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#i definitely need to learn to draw Maya better.
butchbarneygumble · 5 months
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Felt like drawing Moe and Maya, y'know, since they're engaged and all that...
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Frankie Driscoll
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'the most unwanted boy in town'
age: 17
born: October 24th
zodiac sign: Scorpio
catchphrase: 'well fuck me i guess'
favourite ride: The Ferris Wheel
tw: mentions of s/h, the Coat Hanger method, gender dysphoria, su!cidal thoughts
His mother barely talked to him -she didn't want him in the first place, why should she act like it now?-, his father was nowhere to be found after he got told he would be a father, and his older brother moved out of town before he could even meet him, leaving Frankie and his mother in a lonely, loveless house.
As Frankie grew older, he realised he didn't exactly feel right in his body. His voice was too high, his shoulders weren't broad enough, and his boobs were... boobs. Then he realised that his (dead)name didn't feel right either. So, after some intense googling and buzzfeed quizzes, Frankie came out as trans. His mother seemed pretty unfazed when she found out she had a son instead of a daughter. Sure, Frankie was happy she didn’t go all ape-shit transphobic on him and kick him out, but deep down it just reminded him that she didn’t really care about him.
As Frankie grew older, he realised he didn't exactly feel right in his body. His voice was too high, his shoulders weren't broad enough, and his boobs were... boobs. Then he realised that his (dead)name didn't feel right either. So, after some intense googling and buzzfeed quizzes, Frankie came out as trans. His mother seemed pretty unfazed when she found out she had a son instead of a daughter. Sure, Frankie was happy she didn’t go all ape-shit transphobic on him and kick him out, but deep down it just reminded him that she didn’t really care about him.
While his home life was average, he was still trying to decide whether school was better or not. There were transphobes and homophobes, but normally they didn't bother Frankie, not paying that much attention to him. He didn't have many friends, but after joining the school's choir, school definitely wasn't as bad as it had been before. Over time, he actually became friends with some of the other choir members (despite Frankie overthinking everything and convincing himself that they were only being nice to him out of pity).
Then came the day of the fall fair...
other facts about Frankie
is unlabelled, polyamorous and demiromantic
demiboy (ftm)
uses he/they pronouns
favourite colours are yellow and pink, but he tells everyone it's blue (gender norms in society fucked him up real bad)
became friends with Constance first, who then introduced him to her friends and the rest of the choir
tried learning some sign language to be able to say 'hello' to Ricky just to be polite, but over time he liked it so much that he and Ricky could have hour long conversations using sign language
eventually developed small crushes on Noel, Ricky and Mischa but didn't tell anyone (took that secret to his grave-)
alto (only likes to sing when he knows no one can hear them or if he's in a group of people)
mainly gets c's and c-'s in class, either not being interested enough to pay attention, or genuinely having no idea what the subject was about
wants to get diagnosed for autism, but is too scared to talk about it to anyone
fav artists are Cavetown, Will Wood, Queen, Conan Gray, Maya Hawke and Sushi Soucy (secretly loves Taylor Swift)
awkward with a capital A
cuts his own hair (impulsively, most of the time)
in social situations he mainly avoids talking, but by god if he sees an opportunity to make a 'ur mom' joke he will fucking take it
rides his bike everywhere since he doesn’t want his mum taking him anywhere
gets really bad chest dysphoria, so the second he bought a binder he would literally only take it off when he needed to sleep
draws on his hands all the time
doesn't believe in zodiac signs, and gets pissed when people ask for his zodiac sign and then start making assumptions about him
always has his nails painted black
zero self preservation
has really bad coping mechanisms and digs his nails into their arms when they're stressed or upset
sometimes he wishes his mum succeeded in aborting him
when his family heard the news that Frankie had died, his mother fell into a deep depression, and never left the house, not even for the funeral, too guilt ridden to show her face anywhere. However, his brother (along with his newborn son) came back into town for the funeral, saying he felt bad for not being able to meet his little brother, even naming his son after Frankie.
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flowerssamara · 2 years
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The Black Candle: A Kwanzaa Celebration
The Black Candle: A Kwanzaa Celebration is a film directed by MK Asante with narration by Maya Angelou. This documentary was released in 2008. This film was extremely insightful. From someone that was not knowledgeable about Kwanzaa, this film taught me everything I needed to know and even urged me to celebrate the holiday. The film highlights the seven principles of Kwanzaa and what each of them represent. The principles are unity, self-determination, collective work and responsibility, cooperative economics, purpose, creativity and faith. Each of these principles allow the celebrators of Kwanzaa to be reborn and become better versions of themselves for the new upcoming year. My favorite part of the film is when the children are shown practicing everything that has been instilled in them thus far. They show true passion and love for the holiday and take it very seriously. It is evident in the film that they were taught the importance of Kwanzaa and truly understand it. Another part of the film that stood out was the amount of people that celebrated Kwanzaa in the film. It is beautiful that there are people that celebrate this holiday and still reminisce on the day it was officially made a holiday. The qualities that the holiday is based upon are extremely inspiring. A film dedicated to teach the world more about that is a touching idea. Any film that draws a spotlight on Black excellence is a film everyone should see. A holiday that celebrates Black excellence is a holiday that everyone should embrace. The film also has a great quality of tone. As an audience, the feeling of the filmmaker is definitely evident. Maya Angelou is a large part of that. Her voice is angelic yet exudes so much power, she was a wise choice for narration. The film also explains the different traditions originated from African culture. In African culture there are different traditions for getting married, worshiping, music,  learning and most importantly teaching. Kwanzaa is described in the film as "part of the struggle to overturn white definitions for our lives". This is a powerful quote because it causes the audience to think. It caused me to think. It explains why each African country has their own traditions unique to each of their communities. These unique aspects of each of their cultures gives them something whites did not. It gives them the opportunity to identify themselves without the input of whites. There is an interesting clip of James Baldwin. Baldwin explains how a sixteen year old tells him he has no country. That was very interesting because Baldwin also felt like he could not tell him that he did. This film was very raw and felt genuine in regards to sharing the culture and history of the African holiday, Kwanzaa. 
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graedari · 3 years
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Also for the character thing!! Either Maya or Godot?
Okay so!!!! (this is going under a read more since I'm gonna do both!)
Maya:
First impression
She is such a cute and lovable character! I honestly was super excited to learn about her powers and I just love her interactions with Phoenix in the trilogy. Honestly felt like she was truly a younger sister to me while I played TTwTT
Impression now
GOD I LOVE HER. She has so much depth and she's been through so much. Gosh!!!!
Favorite moment
Okay- you haven't gotten here yet Lav, since this scene is from Spirit of Justice, but I just love her talk with Rayfa about responsibility and roles you are born into and how you choose to fulfill them and make a point to do it right by your way! it just really hit me, but I also really loved Rayfa and know she needs a good role model like Maya who experienced similar stresses and expectations over being the Master of Kurain village!
Idea for a story
I would love to see a story about her rebuilding her relationships in her family. Helping shape Pearl into the person she is when she helped raise her after Morgan got put in jail; finally getting closure over Mia's death and not forgetting her memory; getting some more closure over the whole Misty thing as well; building a relationship with Iris, whom deserves to have a chance at being a better person and rejoining the Fey family; etc!
Unpopular opinion
I don't know if this is really unpopular when a majority of the people in the fandom tend to ship Narumitsu, but like, I don't really like Narumayo? I much more see them as brother/sister relationship! (But also no hate if someone does ship it! Just not how I saw their relationship while playing! I know the devs hint towards it more often than not!)
Favorite relationship
Okay, romantic wise, I am a simp for FranMaya. God I love that ship. The dichotomy of their personalities BUT THE SYMBOLISMS OF EXPECTATIONS AND LEGACIES OF THEIR FAMILIES. CHEF KISS. PLEASE CAPCOM
But I also just love the little family she created for herself with the OG trilogy team of Mia, Pearl, Phoenix, Edgeworth, Fanziska, and Gumshoe! Always makes me smile :)
Favorite headcanon
I know it's sorta canon that both her and Miles are Steel Samurai fans, but I just love the idea that the fandom collectively shared in them becoming friends almost behind Phoenix's back and are always texting about Steel Samurai stuff and I just love the relationship of Miles and Maya as sibling bantering (ALSO I WILL SOMETIMES HOP ON THE MILES IS SOMEHOW A FEY HC THAT PEOPLE WILL THROW OUT SOMETIMES)
And now...
Godot:
First impression
I was /not/ a fan. I had really grown to like Fanziska and Miles and was disappointed that they didn't carry over into the next game. His mannerisms also kinda set me off, and I didn't really like him? Just kinda rubbed me the wrong way. I know that Miles and Franziska were also mean to Phoenix during cases, but like they were charming about it? And Godot just felt a little too mean for no reason?
Impression now
I love funny coffee man. He definitely grew on me after the first case. I also deeply love the interlocking backstory between Mia, Phoenix, Dahlia, and him. I really love how complex he is and that he recognizes by the end that he was much more deeply flawed and wrong about his intentions.
Favorite moment
Anytime he mentions how many coffees he's had. Shit cracks me up.
But in all honesty. I just love the scene he's confessing about how he realized his intentions to keep Maya safe were not truly his leading ones and that he reflected how his revenge for Mia had blinded him. It just really hit me and I'm like- damn. Okay. Cool. Now I actually feel bad for him.
Idea for a story
I would love to see him maybe out of prison at some point, rehabilitated, maybe running his own coffee shop that the other's frequent. Maybe even as just a background location. Him possibly seeking out Maya to patch things up between them and then maybe even seeking out to speak to Mia with her or another medium to get his own closure as well (maybe even ask to speak to Misty to apologize for murdering her despite it being a fail-safe for their plan)
Unpopular opinion
I do not like Miego. I thought it was kinda cute to begin with, but then I kinda died off on it... I mean- I can kinda see it sometimes, but like... Idk.. I changed my mind about it I guess.
Favorite relationship
Godot x Coffee
Favorite headcanon
This is 100% from the art that @/_julia_cheesecake_ has done, but it fucking sends me anytime they draw some of the killers in jail. But just Godot interacting with Kristoph there just fucking ends me. I think they only drew it once, but at least once a month, I like to imagine that Godot calls Kristoph a twink
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dessarious · 4 years
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Misconceptions, Miscommunication, and Misinformation Pt77
Inspired by @ozmav Maribat AU
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Damian spent the next day with Marinette at the hotel. Chloe and Luka both had school and Mari needed someone to keep her calm before the meeting with the Justice League. Not to mention Damian did not want to be stuck in the apartment with Drake. When Hawkmoth was unmasked it created a lot of ripples that everyone was still reeling from. Françoise Dupont was one more casualty. Between the ongoing investigation that was happening because of what happened to Marinette and the fact that Hawkmoth’s son went there the school was shut down until they found new staff at the very least. Since Damian hadn’t transferred yet he was off until it went through.
“So how’s your family taking the announcement?” He figured she’d ask eventually but it had taken her three hours so he’d give her points for restraint.
“The same way they take everything. It’s just one more thing for them to make fun of and overanalyze.” He saw her expression go hard and when she spoke there was a dangerous edge to her voice.
“They’re making fun of your sexuality?” He actually shivered at her tone. This was why Batman himself was terrified of this tiny girl.
“No. More making jokes about me having a significant other at all. Apparently they all decided that if I was ever to show interest in someone it would definitely not be reciprocated. At the moment they seem to be debating whether I’m making the whole thing up or holding my boyfriend’s family hostage to get dates.” It was their usual nonsense and he was used to it. Marinette however looked ready to transform and go back to Gotham to ‘talk’ to them.
“You should tell them that’s not okay. You shouldn’t be so worried about dealing with them that you’re afraid of living your life.” Damian just scowled at her in annoyance.
“I’m not afraid of those idiots.” She rolled her eyes and sighed.
“I didn’t say you were. But how many times do you decide to not do something because you don’t want to deal with the fallout? How often do you debate whether it’s worth it to do something that actually makes you happy because you think they’ll give you shit for it? They need to know that’s not okay. You should be able to live your life without being concerned about what they’ll say or do.” That made sense, to a point anyway. When he really considered it he realized she was right. It never would have occurred to him to ask to go to an arts school because he didn’t want to listen to their comments. At the same time, it was how they acted with everyone in the family.
“They don’t just do it to me you know. They constantly harass each other just as much. I could just ignore it and not let it control my actions.” He hadn’t realized how much it did control his actions if he was being honest. That was one of the many things he’d learned about himself because of his friendship with Marinette. Not that he’d ever tell her that.
“That doesn’t make it alright. Just because they don’t discriminate in their stupidity doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be called out on it. Just like when I call you out for being an asshole.” He gave her a flat look but she just smiled at him. It was becoming harder to keep a straight face around her and he couldn’t decide if that was a good or bad thing.
“Any idea what you’re going to say to the Justice League?” All else fails, redirect the conversation. Marinette grimaced at the question before blowing out an annoyed breath.
“I assume that Superman is going to start before I can get a word in edgewise so having an actual speech planned out is pointless. There’s only a few things I want to make clear. First that the ban to travel to Paris will be lifted at the end of the week in case of ‘loose ends’. Mainly I just want them to stew about the fact that they can’t do whatever they please.” Damian let out a snort of laughter at that. Given the way they’d all tried to descend on Paris the moment Hawkmoth’s capture hit the news he understood why she was doing it. They didn’t wait to confirm she had in fact caught the real villain and could have just been putting Paris at risk. “Second, that they still have absolutely no authority over the Miraculous themselves. Having Wonder Woman’s backing should help with that but I wouldn’t be surprised if one or more of them try to tell me to give them the Miraculous. And third, if any of them think tracking us down to take them is a good idea they’ll get the full force of the wrath the Kwami are capable of. Given that Plagg destroyed the dinosaurs in an ‘oops’ moment they should probably be worried about what he can do when angered.”
“As much as I would like to believe words will work, you may have to do another demonstration.” Marinette just nodded at him. She knew as well as he did that this wasn’t going to be easy. It was highly probable that they’d spend the next six months or so showing various members of the League that they needed to back off. Yet another reason for him to stay in Paris. Damian still didn’t understand why Marinette didn’t just ask him for the civilian identities of the heroes so she could deal with them herself. “Did you figure out which wheelchair you want to get? My father said he’d pay the difference if you need something out of your price range.”
“That’s a kind offer but I’m not struggling for money. My business has actually gotten even better since the fashion show. I might actually have to hire some people to make the clothing so I can concentrate on design if I don’t want to start turning people away. I’m also getting a lot of interest from clothing manufacturers about designing discount clothing to market to a broad audience. Honestly just doing one of those would likely have me set for life. I’m just glad I’m at the point where this won’t completely destroy my parents financially. While it’s nice to know they love me enough to sell the bakery and move somewhere that’s accessible to me I would never want them to have to.”
“Well if you need tips or names of people to help with that, Drake would be a good source. I know that you have Jagged stone but global manufacturing is different from music in a lot of ways. Wayne Enterprises deals with a lot more of the problems you’re likely to see.” She nodded thoughtfully before offering him a bright smile.
“Thanks, I might just do that. It’ll be helpful to talk to someone who knows the ins and outs of things. I was actually going to ask you since I have a feeling you know a lot more about your father’s business than you let on.” Damian just blinked at her for a moment before giving out a sigh and pulled out his phone to send her a list he’d put together. It was names and numbers of people in the company who could help her along with various laws, specifically intellectual copyright laws, and some other things to do with business. She just gave him another bright smile before she started drawing in her sketchbook again. He really wished he could figure out how she did that.
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purplerose244 · 4 years
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Thoughts journal Ninjago season 13!!! 🤩🤩 (3/4)
I am enjoying the season A LOT. The reveal has been thrown already, everything seems to be leading towards something special about Rock Mom and I couldn't hope for something better!! I know Lou will be back so I guess a flashback?... I'M SO EXCITED 💕💕
Alright, let's start!!
DUNGEON PARTY!
Side note, we're past the season and no Nexo Knights reference. Me sad, but me not quitting like ninja!! 💪💪
Korgran of METALONIA?!?! WHERE KARLOF COMES FROM!!! Oh you just love to feed me with good throwbacks, now do you Ninjago crew 😍
Plundar the thief, yeah, the attire gives it away although it is nice. And Fungus... huh... well that explains the mushrooms on the hat I guess 😅
Yep, there we go, a party of adventurers, the DnD situation promised 👈👈 He said loot, I saw a 20 faced dice, nice nice
In these recent seasons adventurers just won't like to do adventures for one reason or another, first uncle Powers, now these guys? I mean Ninjago is in danger every freaking time and you risk your life at every step and there's a new formidable villain every like five seconds but... huh... what was my point again?
THE ANIME STYLE IS BACK 😂😂 Oh boy I can tell we're in for a train to crazy town
I'm thinking this dude looks a lot like He-Man... of course he does, the HECK, am I noticing this just now? 😑
I do agree with mister Korgran's father reluctance about talking like that (I saw too many anime characters like that 😂), but Karlof uses the third person too. Either it's common in Metalonia, or there's a general lack of education there 😅 (I LOVE METAL BOY I MISS HIM 🖤🖤)
Talking axe that doesn't talk, nice 😂
Okay... okay, I need a moment
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This is too cute. I know her head is a bit too big but LOOK AT THEM 💛🤍💛🤍 Has Chompy never grown?... wait he did got big that one time... okay... okay, never mind
Well that's a pretty nice party, you got your barbarian, your magic user and your rogue. Kinda misses a healer but still... tomorrow I'm doing a DnD session with my friends and I wanna sound like I know stuff 😂
I just noticed that I haven't seen hidden trap doors like that since Chen, the ABC of villains right there my friends 👆
So the King didn't become evil just because of the skull, he actually wished to obtain it and use the dark power. I get that he wants to defend the city but he is basically remorceless about everything else, so he is guilty. Also DRAGON ABUSER 😡
Poor Vania, but she overcame her Skylor situation very quickly. Proud 💛
There we go with the encouragement, you go Rocky!! We have a crazy Skull dude to turn into dust!! 👿👿
Wait, a promise he made a long time ago? Rock mom?
DUNGEON CRAWL!
ROCK MOM!!! YAAAASSS!!! FINALLY SHE'S HERE!!! 🖤🖤🖤
Oh holy FSM, my heart 💔
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MY HEART HURTS SO MUCH. Cole as a kid, Lou is back, Rock Mom IS SICK AND WILL DIE, all the drawings, the picture of them together 😭😭
I cannot, freaking, this kid doesn't want his mom to be sick and he's gotten into troubles at school and she wants him to fight and be strong and right and SHE HAS HIS SAME EYEBROWS 😢😢😢😢😢😢
This scene was really heartbreaking, such a genuine situation with a kid that wants her mom to be fine and proud of him 🖤
Just looked at her VA and it's Erin Matthews 🤩 So first I'm counting it as a Nexo Knights reference just because MACY AND ROBIN ❤🖤❤🖤 Second, wasn't "the mom" going to be voiced by Jillian? Is it... is it Maya? Is she coming back? MAYBE NEXT SEASON??? NYA SEASON?!?!? 🤯🤯
Oh, we're moving on? So... so there's still the stuff about Rock Mom's past to uncover, still unsure if she was the one of the blades for the two tribes
PLUNDAR WE DO NOT DISRESPECT COLE INTO THIS HOUSE VANIA MY GIRL YOU ARE SPEAKING FOR ME TOO 💪💪
The connection between Cole and his mom is the earth itself, I'm loving this concept so much. It's true that he never found himself this deep into his element before, the Caves of Despair were mines but never this deep. This really is rock bottom... HECK YEAH
Well Cole...
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Welcome to the colored eyes because of elemental power ninja team!! 💚❤🧡 (without counting the forbidden scroll moments) I LOVE WHEN IT HAPPENS!!! I'M GETTING SO PROUD AND EMOTIONAL!!! I'M PROUDOTIONAL!!! 🤯
Aww, Cole saving his son sensei, very nice. They did save each other a lot 🤷‍♀️
This place reminds me a lot of the Fire Temple where Kai got himself into trouble in season 1 but then saved Lloyd, one of my favorite and most memorable episode of the show... I'M TOO NOSTALGIC RIGHT NOW LET'S MOVE ON
NEVER MIND COLE IS TAKING CHARGE LIKE OLD TIMES HE IS FINALLY THE LEADER AGAIN I'M GONNA CRY ROCKY I'M SO HAPPY YOU DESERVE THIS 🖤
Wu's spinjitzu!! Always nice to see it 😊 And yes Adam is a good boy, and for my arachnophobia is a little freaky saying it 😅
Ah, good Plundar, Cole needs all the appreciation of the world because HE IS SUCH A GOOD PERSON AND AMAZING WARRIOR AND I LOVE HIM AAAAAA
This is probably my favorite episode for now, got Rock Mom, got elemental powers, got a lot of Cole in all of his glory: the leader with a clear smart mind able to lead even strangers, with big heart for what's important 👏👏
I feel like this season is giving him glory, I'm curious about how it will end!!
GRIEF-BRINGER
Okay I know it's the name of the dragon... and it gets me a little antsy 😅
Back to the munce! Still doing as good as ever I see! 😅 And lol, you can't blame Nya for not being nice Jay! Although she is kinda best friends with Ronin who double crossed her multiple times... okay, I see your reasoning Bluebell
There we go, Nya making them listen. I honestly could have seen her just grabbing one of them and make them fly through the the room, still cool though 😎
Back to the geckles! Also doing as good as ever! 😅 These little purple guys are so dang cute, seeing my flame babe trying to lead is so PRECIOUS, and even more PRECIOUS is Zane giving him support... and a rock in the face 🤍🤍
Gotta say
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I'm more and more fascinated by their culture 😂😂
Aww little Gleck, everything had started with him after all... wait... HER NAME IS LILLY?!?! ROCK MOM HAS A NAME!!! AND SHE IS GILLIE/MILLIE!!! I KNEW IT!!! 🤩🤩
I think I saw the name somewhere, didn't think it was actually her. I always headcanoned her as Gaia, but Lilly is a very sweet name too 💕
It is pretty nice that even though we as viewers didn't know what happened to Lilly, the ninja knew. It's obvious, they've known each other for so long, but still. It feels nice to see this 😊
Oh-oh, Skull dude is up to something... and he said the title 👈👈
Zane keeps being the sweetest thing ever created, le cute dude 🤍🤍 Never thought I'd see Tin Can and Hothead discussing about lies while two slugs race each other...
I don't know if it's the new animation but the armored suits look CRAZY GOOD, the metal and the details are awesome!! I approve the suits of this season 👍
Pff, they are talking down his sister, if he knew they would be literally toasted 🔥
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HUG HUG BEAUTIFUL LEGO HUG!!! And she lifts him up, omg the Smith siblings are back and they are so CUTE 😍
Yep, only he can talk down his sister... and possibly be annihilated right after 😅
Oh, the dragon that almost destroyed the two tribes... OH THE DRAGON THAT ALMOST DESTROYED THE TWO TRIBES!!! 😱😱
NO GUYS DON'T LEAVE LLOYD AND ZANE BEHIND, THEY ARE THE MOST PRONE TO SACRIFICE THEMSELVES 😭😱😭😱😭😱
The cringe Kai, the cringe never leaves you alone you beautiful idiot ❤
I cannot believe the animators managed to make Lloyd's LEGO hair swoosh, I must applaude them 👏👏👏 Also POOR BABY ON THE GROUND GIVE HIM A VACATION FOR CRYING OUT LOUD
Well aren't things getting even more complicated 😅 Where is Cole? We need season superstar pronto!
MASTERS NEVER QUIT
Awww, major throwback to the show's most famous motto right in the title! NINJA NEVER QUIT!!! LET'S GO THEN!!! 🤩
The upply team! With the lava beast back... I could easily make comment about how it could be a representation of Cole's feelings since it's LAVA with EARTH and FIRE, and he is running from them... I'M JUST RAMBLING MOVING ON 🖤❤🖤❤
Cole misses the Caves of Despair maybe, he wants to have a round with the carts like in Possession 😂 Was that why he knew it was going to work eventually? That would be histerical, especially since back then they all almost fell into the lava 😅😅
The Heart of the Mountain? Secret temple of the masters of Earth? Possibly hidden in Shintaro? Spinjitzu Burst? Wu, let me ask you this... just in case... is there... perhaps...
IS THERE SOMETHING YOU SHOULD'VE TOLD US??? 😡😡
He is definitely and officially old, only reason why he keeps forgetting to warn people about stuff 😑 I mean, it's not major like with Morro or Aspheera, I guess it's an improvement?... kinda?
So you learn spinjitzu burst if you're surrounded by your element, that sounds pretty awesome! I wonder how it could be with all the others, this can open up kinda like a quest for the true potential but with different places and lots of OP powers and I'M INTO IT 🤩🤩🤩
Okay season, I get it
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YOU WANNA MAKE ME CRY 😭😭 I love this aztec vibe, so cool and appropriate she looks STUN 🖤
I didn't expect this much introspection about Cole, I thought it was going to be kinda last minute like with Jay in Prime Empire. I'm so thankful it's not like that, freaking yes. YES. GO COLE BURST OUT!!
... okay, take your time sweetie, no rush. The other ninja are just going to be fried but eh, happens all the time 🤷‍♀️
VANIA MAH GIRL 💕 I understand Wu, I mean the guys kinda learned all they needed already back when they started to train Lloyd. Ever since then, they had been not master and students, but just family. And you always need family, no matter how far you go 🖤
Awwww, Wu! You got your own development too! 👍 So nice to hear "ninja never quit" again, can't be too sure but it's been a while 😍
Let's hope the guys are doing fine resisting while Team Cole arrives 😎😎
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suchdan-veryphil · 4 years
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I’ll Be In Touch- A Dad!Ben Solo Imagine
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Request:
Anonymous said: hi idk if ur taking requests atm but i absolutely loved ur dad ben solo fic i always re read it. Could u do another dad!ben solo where he’s like a single dad and the reader is his child’s teacher and he gets all flustered at a parent teacher conference cos he’s like woah?? thank uu
Word Count: 1,976
Trigger Warnings: I don’t even think there’s swearing here. Pure floof.
A/N: I LOVE DAD!BEN SOLO !!!!!!!!! THANK YOU FOR THIS REQUEST! Also I’m trying my best to make some of these more gender-inclusive. If there is anything that I can do better, please let me know! 
--------------
Ben’s POV: 
If it were up to me, I’d get a long note in the mail about how Maya is doing in class. But, here I was waiting on the world’s smallest chair to meet with her teacher. I looked around and down the hallway, the walls covered with drawings and pieces of art by the children. Curious, I stood up and walked across the hall to look at the hand turkeys on the wall. 
I looked closer at all of them, looking for Maya’s name on one. When my eyes landed on it, I knew it was hers. The black scribbles covered the page and she decorated it in blue and purple stars. My lips curled into a smile as I compared it to the other kids’ pieces that were splashed in neat bright colors. I couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped me. 
Definitely my kid. 
I was brought back to where my feet were by the sound of a couple being escorted out by Maya’s teacher. 
“Thank you, guys! I’ll see you at the family game night!” their voice was soft and gentle, but also full of excitement, catching my attention. I turned to face them, knowing my time-slot was next. 
I looked down expecting to see a 72-year-old grandmother hunched over a cane, wearing some reading glasses. I was pleasantly surprised as my eyes were met with a young adult, shorter than me, with a smile that blinded me. I felt a pull at my chest that I hadn’t felt since I met Maya’s mother 8 years ago. I stayed quiet as I walked closer, unsure of what I would even say. I forced a smile that I’m sure came out as more of a grimace, and I instantly regretted it. Rarely did I leave my house except to go to work and go shopping with my spunky 5-year-old so human interaction was not my specialty. 
“Mr. Solo? Maya’s dad, right? Come on in!” They turned to walk into the classroom and sit behind their desk. I looked around at the walls and tiny tables, all decorated in bright colors, broken crayons, and welcoming feelings. 
“Take a seat! Make yourself comfortable,” 
I sat in the only other adult-sized chair in the room across from the person who hung out with my kid 5 days a week. 
“Mr. Solo-” 
“Ben, you can call me Ben,” I cleared my throat as I crossed my ankle over my knee and made my best effort to make eye contact with them. They smiled at me and nodded. 
“Ben, thank you. You can call me Y/N, then. Thank you for being on time, a lot of parents are rolling in here five or ten minutes late,” they smiled at me and pulled a folder off of the top of a pile. 
“Oh, yea- well I usually try to be a few minutes early to everything to avoid … being la- being late...” I mentally slapped myself as I cleared my throat. 
Idiot... Just focus on Maya.
I watched as they smiled and nodded at my comment. “That’s a sturdy plan, Ben. So, I guess I’ll start with Maya’s strengths in the classroom and then we can move into some challenges and any questions that I have or that you have, okay?” 
I nodded and leaned in as they opened the folder and took out a few worksheets. “So, in kindergarten reading levels is really what we focus on and Maya is a very strong reader. I can see her moving into the first grade level before the year is over!” They took out two pieces of paper from the folder and placed them in front of me. 
“She loves reading non-fiction, and she will memorize a book before she puts it down,” Y/N said as they chuckled a little. I smiled and nodded, knowing exactly what they meant.
“Yea, well, I blame myself for that. I did the same thing when I was little. I still do it sometimes, it’s weird. But, there are lots of useless facts up here, thanks to that weird …. thing …” I stopped myself and laughed a little as I read over Maya’s reading scores. I couldn’t prevent the smile of pride that spread across my face as I read the comments on her persistence and positivity. 
“Well, I personally don’t believe in useless facts, Mr. So-Ben,” 
I looked up and smiled at them before I put the paper back on the desk. 
“Her math is a little bit more of a challenge for her, I’ve noticed. She wants to know, and she wants to learn but I find that when she doesn’t understand after a few tries, she gets frustrated and needs to take a break, which is completely encouraged except she doesn’t want to return to the task at hand.” 
I nodded my head and shifted in my seat a little bit.
Stop fidgeting, they’re gonna think you’re weird. 
Focusing back on Y/N, I looked at the papers they were showing me. They continued to go into detail about how Maya is a great student and that she just needs help with being persistent. Although, I would be a hypocrite if I said that I didn’t also have a short fuse at times. I was fully aware of how similar my daughter and I were, from our temper to our preferred activities but I was proud of myself and of her. 
“How is she doing socially?”  I asked and sat back. 
“She is thriving socially, Ben. Your daughter is the cutest little munchkin in the mornings. She stands right where you’re sitting and she’ll greet every single one of her classmates by name. She’s quite the charmer.” 
“Really? That’s too funny. She talks about her two best friends, Jordan and Tia. She told me how she likes to sit with Tia on her right and Jordan on her left because the two of them like to talk to each other and she doesn’t want to be distracted, so she separates them,” I chuckled at the thought of my 5 year old plopping herself between two other tiny humans to prevent them from distracting her from the coursework. 
“Oh Tia and Jordan. The three of them are something else. I had to separate those two one time and Maya has taken it upon herself to be the peacekeeper ever since. It’s very sweet. It seems like you’ve got quite the leader on your hands,” Y/N smiled as the words flowed.
It was refreshing to talk to someone who wasn’t my mom about Maya. I truly had a lot of pride in the way I’ve been raising her despite my struggles. To hear that she was doing well and was a pleasure to have in class took a weight, that I wasn’t even aware I was carrying, off of my shoulders. 
“That’s Maya...” I trailed off and bit my lip as I thought about it. 
“Did you have any questions for me, Ben?” They asked as they began to pile the papers back into the folder. 
“Um...” suddenly every question that I had for Y/N was gone. I sighed and shook my head. ‘They’ve all left me,” 
They chuckled and nodded their head. “That’s okay. Do you want to take down my cell number? Some parents use it for really urgent questions or updates on their kiddos during a hard day,” 
For some reason, I could feel myself get giddy over the fact that they were offering me their personal number. 
Don’t freak out, they just said that other parents have it, too. Get it together, Ben. 
“Sure, that would be very helpful. You don’t mind if I text you if I remember those questions?” 
“Not at all, that’s what I’m here for,” 
It took me a second, but I finally went fumbling for my phone to take the number down. I handed it over so that they could just plug it in and I could save it. When I got it back, I noticed that they had texted themselves a quick message saying, “Ben Solo’s number”. I slid the phone back into my pocket, trying to hold back the smile that was beginning to pull at my face. 
“Perfect, so uh... did you have any questions for me?” I asked, unsure of what to say now.
“I don’t at the moment but if I think of anything, I’ll shoot you a text,” They seemed so confident when they spoke, which was not helping my growing-by-the-second crush on them. 
“Perfect, so then I’ll be in touch. Thank you, Y/N,” 
“Of course, any time Ben.” With that, they handed me the folder with Maya’s work in it and smiled as they stood with me to escort me out. 
“Talk to you soon,” I mentally slapped myself again. I really couldn’t just shut up for an entire thirty seconds. 
“I sure hope so. Have a good night and tell Maya I said hi,” they stopped at the doorway and bit their lip gently as I turned to face them. I wasn’t sure if I was being flirted with so I just smiled and waved. 
The entire ride home, all I could think about was how absolutely ridiculous I must have sounded during that entire twenty minute meeting. I also questioned whether or not we were flirting or if they were just the nicest person on the planet. 
I parked in the driveway and as I turned off the engine, I could see Maya run out to the front yard. 
“Daddy! You’re home!” 
I smiled wide and climbed out of the vehicle to meet her. She continued to run towards me and I picked her up as soon as she got close enough. 
“I miss’t you daddy,” she said as she wrapped her arms around my neck. 
“I missed you, too, ewok,” I squeezed her a little to let her know that I meant it before looking over to see my mom standing with her hands on her hips. 
“She is exactly like you were as a child, stubborn and charming.” 
I smiled and nodded my head as I walked towards her, Maya still snugly hanging onto my body. 
“I know, but where do you think that I got it from?” 
“Your father,” Mom didn’t miss a beat, and I didn’t argue with her. “How was your meeting?” 
I suddenly felt awkward again as I recalled my interaction with Y/N. “Fine.” 
“How’s our little one doing in school?” 
“Nana I am doin’ amazing, I read and I write,” 
“And she needs help in math, isn’t that right kid?” I looked at her with a small smile before I kissed her cheek and started walking into the home. 
“Well that’s good. I’m sure she’ll be fine.” My mom held the door for me and Maya before making her way to the kitchen. “I was just finishing up dinner,” 
I sat on the couch with my little rebel and rubbed her back as she sat contently with me. My phone chirped in my pocket and I reached in to grab it before it went off a second time. Confused, I took a hard stare at it. 
Y/N: I have a question. -5:23PM
Y/N: Are you free next weekend? -5:23PM
I didn’t even realize what my face was doing until Maya poked my cheek. “Daddy, you’re happy! Who is that?” 
I locked my screen and put my phone down calmly before I shook my head. “A friend, sweetie, that’s all.” 
“Do they want to eat dinner with us?” 
I laughed a little and shrugged. “I don’t think Nana made enough for that many people, maybe another time.” I chuckled and rested my cheek on top of her head, just thinking about Y/N and asking myself how in the galaxy did they not find me absolutely weird. 
But, I wasn’t complaining. 
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ayellowcurtain · 4 years
Text
Prompt: maybe Lucas going to one of these urbex parties (invited by Eliott of course) and someone there thinking they have an open relationship because of the [redacted] with Lola, he hits on Lucas and Eliott founds out is not funny being on the other side of things.
Eliott at the urbex party with Mayas Gang (+Lola) while Lucas went to a party with the boy squad and they bump into each other in the roads late at night and Eliott does the typical seeing Lucas noice and running over to him to kiss him and Jo is just like "biggest Elu shipper in the world"?
Eliott had finally created the courage to invited Lucas and the boys to an urbex party. It’s his two worlds colliding in one public place and so he can’t help but feel a little insecure. Especially of Lucas’ reaction since it took Eliott months to actually invite him to come to one of his favorite places to party.
Lucas went out before him, telling him that he was going to Yann’s first. He didn’t ask, didn’t warn, just told Eliott where he was going while Eliott was still taking a shower.
He left their bathroom to find an empty and quiet flat to himself. Eliott would be lying if he said it didn’t sting. The feeling of being left behind when Lucas could very well invite him to go to Yann’s too, but he didn’t.
They text each other and Lucas will meet him there with the boys so Eliott goes alone to the urbex place of choice. He’s done this so many times by now, but tonight feels weird, harder.
He tries to ease his worries as he gets to the party, meeting the Lamifex right away and they’re a good way to keep himself busy, with their loud voices, talking over each other, always sort of disagreeing in a loving way.
If Eliott could draw them, they would all be some type of pack of wild puppies. These days he’s only been able to draw a raccoon and a hedgehog, nothing else.
Jo drags him to go paint something outside and everyone else follows, watching them closely. Lola and Maya are a little further away, clearly talking about something private, but Eliott doesn’t care. He’s happy they’re finally talking, but he doesn’t care enough to risk losing Lucas so he keeps his distance for now.
But suddenly, everyone goes quiet and Eliott frowns, looking over his shoulder only to be starstruck like the others. Lucas and the boys are there, walking upstairs like they’re some sort of a rock band. Eliott’s world starts moving so slowly, in high definition as he watches Lucas mess up his hair, finally finding Eliott close to the ground, crouching down to pain the wall in front of him.
Nobody else except for Lola knows Lucas and the boys and they don’t have the best experiences with each other, so Eliott quickly gets up, suddenly feeling so nervous, like this is his first time talking to Lucas.
“Hi...” Lucas says very carefully and to everyone, clearly not wanting to have to say hi privately to everyone, to Lola.
Everyone is still kind of looking around each other, blushing a little and Eliott can’t believe his boyfriend and all his friends are creating this shock with the Lamifex.
“This is Lucas...my boyfriend.” Eliott finally manages to recover himself enough to use his words to form a sentence, standing closer to Lucas, leaving an uncertain kiss on his lips.
“I thought you two were in an open relationship, because of Lo-” Sekou says with his usual matter-of-fact kind of way and Eliott panics, sees how Lucas clenches his jaw and just looks down, but thankfully Max changes the subject, giving Lucas and the boys all their names. They all move on from that phrase quickly and Eliott stands by Lucas’ side, hearing The Gang getting to know Lamifex.
Eliott wants to talk, to ask if Lucas is okay, why he left the house like that, but not in front of everyone. For right now, he’s just happy they’re in the same place for once.
Jo keeps staring at him and Lucas until she can’t help herself, stepping closer, stopping right in front of them “You guys are so cute! You look so good together...” 
Lucas is caught by surprise, frowning but he laughs shyly and Eliott smiles, feeling proud for some reason. 
“We brought some beer, if you guys want!” Yann says and the Lamifex is more than excited about it, pulling Yann - literally by his arm - to show where they can go to sit and drink for a little bit.
Lucas follows them and Eliott follows him, biting the inside of his lip to keep his words to himself.
The night goes well, still with a hint of awkwardness, but mostly is ignored. Lola ignores Lucas, Lucas ignores Lola and they all get along way too well even. Baz and Arthur try to learn with Jo how she dances and Lucas watches them, laughing and teasing his friends with Yann, close to Eliott, but not really acknologing him.
Eliott notices how a guy approaches them, sitting where Baz was, right next to Lucas, trying to create a conversation about the dance party happening in front of them. He and Lucas start talking excitedly about Lucas’ friends and their terrible dancing skills. Sekou joins them and Eliott reminds of what he said before. The guy is clearly interested in Lucas, not even trying to hide it and Sekou seems to know him.
“Hi...” Eliott cuts their conversation short, raising his arm in front of Lucas. Sekou’s friend is a little confused, looking at Sekou and back to Eliott, shaking his hand.
“Hi...?”
“I’m Eliott? Lucas’ boyfriend.” Eliott raises his eyebrows and nods his head towards Lucas like it’s not obvious they’re talking about him.
“Oh...Hm, I’m Leo.” He finally shakes Eliott’s hand, clearly uncomfortable for getting caught hitting on someone that’s in a relationship.
Jo suddenly grabs Lucas’ hand and he and Yann are gone to the dance floor with the others. Eliott watches and Sekou comes to sit in between him and Leo.
-
At some point, Eliott lost sight of Lucas and the boys. He bites his nails, drinking his beer slowly, it’s even getting warm and disgusting. Maya comes to join him and Eliott smiles at her, shoving his hand inside his pocket.
“Hey, you.” She bumps her arm against his and he laughs.
“Hi! How are you?” He raises his eyebrows and nods his head, Lola is nowhere to be seen.
“I’m good, having fun. Trying to keep Max and Jo alive. You?” Eliott smiles at her just because Maya doesn’t deserve to be in the receiving end of his annoyance, but he looks down, not really caring to completely hide his sudden bad mood.
“Good too! Kind of tired though...”
Maya hums and Eliott looks at her again, knowing that there’s a lot more inside her head than just a word. “It’s still early, but yeah, you’re always the first one to leave.”
She teases and Eliott sighs in defeat. She’s not wrong. Usually he always get the sudden need to be with Lucas and so he’s always the first one to rush back home.
“And Lola?” He asks and Maya holds his stare, nodding her head.
“Went on a walk with Max. Probably to smoke. A normal cigar.” Eliott bite the inside of his cheek and nods his head like Maya does.
“Better than weed, I guess.”
Maya shrugs, probably agreeing with him. It’s a long process, Lola is a lot better, but Maya probably thinks it would be best for her to stop smoking completely. She’s not wrong, again, but she understands this process is not a quick one so Lola needs more time and maybe to grow up a little more. Maya is a lot more extreme than Eliott is, a lot stronger too.
Their conversation is interrupted when Eliott finally finds Lucas again. Coming back inside with Yann and Arthur.
“I gotta go.” He says to Maya, but doesn’t bother to say a proper goodbye.
Eliott rushes to Lucas like he’s the air he needs, crashing into him with a quick kiss, not caring Lucas is caught by surprise.
“Can we go home?” He asks and Lucas looks around at the boys, like he doesn’t want to leave with Eliott, but his emotions - his care for Eliott or his feelings for him - are louder than his pride.
“Okay...”
Lucas says goodbye to Yann and Arthur and Eliott follows him. Yann hugs him a little tighter and longer than normal and Eliott feels a little ashamed, not meeting Yann’s eyes before leaving with Lucas.
They walk through the empty streets with a heavy, full of unsaid word silence between them. Eliott breaths in to gather some courage and he holds Lucas’ jacket by his elbow, making him stop and turn to look at him.
“I’m sorry...”
“Huh?”
“For what I did today...and with the movie.”
Lucas digests his quick explanation, opens his mouth and wets his lips with his tongue before explaining. “I was just talking to him...”
He shrugs and Eliott puts all his weight on his tiptoes, controlling his urge to touch Lucas.
“I know. I know and I was just...jealous.” Before the awkward silence becomes unbearable again, Eliott repeats the words that kept dancing around his head all night long. “I can’t lose you, Lucas.”
Lucas doesn’t answer, just looks down and Eliott sighs, coming closer, holding his face gently, but not asking for anything, just using Lucas’ presence to calm them both down a little bit.
When a second goes by, Eliott gently moves Lucas to look up at him. He’s so beautiful, even when he’s broken.
“I like you. I like us. I like being around you, hearing your crazy stories, watching you with your friends, seeing how much you care for them. I like your personality, how brave you are, how fearless and reckless you can be, how much love you want to give, I like that you’re adventurous, I like that you give people so many chances and sometimes you don’t give them not even two, sometimes you give all of yourself and sometimes you don’t even bother. I like who you are, all of it, how much you care...about me. I don’t just love you, you know? I don’t just love you because you’re with me. I just genuely love who you are.”
Lucas quivers under his touch as he exhales and whispers. “Stop...”
“You don’t even know. I could go on for days.” Eliott huffs and draws an invisible line with the tip of his nose along Lucas’.
“You don’t have to.” Lucas quietly shake his head. “But I told you how I wasn’t that perfect person you thought I was. You were warned since the beggining.” He teases like he always does when he’s trying to lighten the mood and keep himself from crying.  
“Lucas...” Eliott laughs, his eyes following his thumbs caressing Lucas’ cheeks. “I just told you: I like everything, all of it. You deserve all the love and I wanna be the person that gives it to you.” Eliott says like a confession, even though he thought Lucas already knew about all of this, it still feels a lot telling him with actual words. Eliott has to meet Lucas’ eyes to make sure he understands.
“Yeah, but you deserve better. And I’m sorry for being such a fucking asshole. I can’t stop myself sometimes.”
Eliott kisses him to stop Lucas from thinking so little of himself again, thinking he was the only one in the wrong, like he’s only made of bad bones when that’s so far from the truth. “I don’t want you to. I don’t want us to live our life holding back from each other anymore.”
Lucas nods his head, whispering. “We can try.”
“Yes, we can.”
Lucas looks down again, resting his forehead against Eliott’s chest and he lets him, kissing the top of his head.
“I like you too. So very much, you’ll never be able to fully understand.” Lucas confesses and Eliott smiles against his hair.
“Try me. Every day.”
Lucas puts his arms around Eliott and he can feel Lucas’ hands gabbring the back of his jacket so tightly.
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ram-reads · 4 years
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Gods of Jade and Shadow follows a girl called Casiopea from Yucatán. Like Cinderella, she and her mother live with her grandfather and are treated as maids. Longing to leave her small town her wish is granted when she opens a mysterious trunk in her grandfather’s room and pierces her finger on the bones within. A Mayan god named Hun-Kamé materializes from the bones proclaiming that he is the true ruler of Xibalba, the Mayan underworld. His brother, Vucub-Kamé, trapped him in the box and now that he is free he needs to collect his missing ear, finger, eye, and necklace. Casiopea must come along because a bone shard stuck in her finger is the only thing allowing Hun-Kamé to walk the earth. The longer it stays in her the more life she loses and the more mortal he becomes. Vucub-Kamé doesn’t plan on letting Hun-Kamé reclaim his throne without a fight though, so he enlists the help of Casiopea’s cousin Martín, pitting brother against brother and cousin against cousin. The plot was perfect in every way. I was constantly engaged because the story never felt like it lagged. I wish some scenes had been drawn out a little longer, but that’s a minor complaint that slightly stems from me liking the story too much that I didn’t want it to end. In hindsight though it’s the perfect length because there was a purpose for everything that happened and anymore would probably have been unnecessary. The author completely nailed the vibe of myths. You have a quest to find a certain number of items, a race against time, and symbolism galore. Toss in magic, monsters, and gods and the tableau is complete. I love stories based on mythology, and I love them even more when it isn’t Greek mythology (not that I don’t like Greek mythology, I just think it’s been overdone and there are plenty of other mythologies to draw inspiration from). Going into this story I knew very little about Maya mythology so part of the appeal came from reading about a mythology that is relatively new to me. Because of this lack of knowledge I can’t say whether it was done well but it felt well researched. I, for whatever reason, wasn’t aware that this book took place during the 1920s, so when I discovered that it did I was super happy because I absolutely love historical fantasy. Just like with mythology, I like it when the historical fiction I consume takes place in countries outside of England and the United States. I’ll admit, I can’t recall reading any book that takes place in Mexico, so following Casiopea as she travels through her country was a pleasure. I feel like I learned a lot about Mexico and Maya mythology from this book. If anyone worries they’ll be lost don’t because there is a glossary at the back that is a perfect resource (even if I didn’t realize it was there until after I finished).
To make this book even better the characters were fun to follow. They all had strong personalities, even the minor characters. The author excelled at making each character their own that I never had trouble differentiating between them when the perspectives changed. Casiopea is definitely now my favorite female character. She’s not perfect by any means but that’s why I liked her. She doesn’t pretend like she’s a human being with no faults, and she doesn’t necessarily have any special talents that make her stand out. This characterization of Casiopea made her feel like an actual human being. The author doesn’t fall into the hole of making her female character fit into a specific stereotype (super special savior, sweet and innocent girl who can do no wrong, a snarky strong woman who has no time for feelings) so I can actually connect to her character. I loved her thoughtfulness, that she gets easily angered, and that she can rationally sort through her problems without relying solely on what her heart wants. She is such a wonderfully written female character that it makes me eager to pick up more books by this author. Hun-Kamé was a treat. I will always love powerful beings who start off being aloof and slowly become awkward sweethearts. I was happy to see that he respected women. There’s a conversation between him and Casiopea near the beginning that just made my heart swell with affection for him. His pride as a god makes him unaware of how other people feel so there were many fun moments where Hun-Kamé just Did Not get something. His slow transformation from a god into a mortal happens so effortlessly. It was enjoyable picking up on these changes in his character. As far as supernatural royal beings go he is currently my favorite one because his characterization is so on point. The other two main characters were Vucub-Kamé and Martín. Vucub-Kamé was an interesting antagonist. Being the twin god of Hun-Kamé he is just as prideful, but not as respectful. Unlike his brother he doesn’t care about the balance of the world and only cares about being worshipped by humans. When you get down to it though he’s actually a pretty complex character and I wouldn’t mind getting a short story focusing more on him. There isn’t much to say about Martín. He’s a sexist cousin of Casiopea who tormented her as she grew up. He has his own story arc too, but I didn’t care much for him. There is romance in this between Casiopea and Hun-Kamé. I was worried I would hate the romance but it was so good. It just happened so naturally! There was no instalove, no annoying back and forth, no unending proclamations about how attracted to each other they are without developing any actual chemistry. Their love gradually blossomed and that’s the kind of romance I prefer in books. I’ll admit I liked them as friends and was skeptical of it becoming a romance, but man am I glad it did. The book wouldn’t have hit as hard if it didn’t. I need me a man like Hun-Kamé. You might be wondering how a romance between a god and a mortal would work. Well, you’ll just have to read the book to find out! The way the author wrote Gods of Jade and Shadow definitely aided in making the book feel like it’s own myth that was created years ago. I’ve already written about why that is, but it bears repeating because it’s impressive. This book does have perspective shifts between the four characters I mentioned before, but it mostly follows Casiopea and her thoughts. The author's writing style at times felt a little too tell-y for my tastes, but luckily it didn’t get too over the top. My favorite part of the writing was definitely the descriptions of the different places visited. As someone who has never been to Mexico I appreciated the author’s dedication to making sure the reader was always aware they were in Mexico and not somewhere else. The dreamlike quality of Xibalba was also well written. I greatly enjoyed this book because there was very little wrong with it. The story was unique, the characters were lovely, and the writing style made the book feel like it’s an old myth that’s only recently been rediscovered (the author nailed all the mythmaking requirements). I also loved that it turned out to be part of my favorite genre, historical fantasy. If you’re a fan of mythology, historical fiction, or even just like reading about humans falling in love with supernatural beings you can’t go wrong with Gods of Jade and Shadow. I definitely think this book should have a bigger fanbase.
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nighttimepixels · 4 years
Note
How do you draw chubby characters, if I can ask? I've only really been able to draw one type of body and I want to expand that! And your art is so lovely I wanted to ask you. If this ask makes your uncomfortable, you dont need to answer!
Oh stars, I dunno if I’m any sort of high tier speaker on this, but I can give a few tips?
First, it’s really common for most artists to start with only being able to draw a fairly lean or lean-adjacent stock body; it’s rad that you’re looking to work on that, and I’m delighted and cheering you on, right there with you! Also, super flustered and grateful that you’d say as much.
There are a few main things you’ll want to do to draw a better variety of body types:
Look at different body types! Actively seek ‘em out!
This sounds almost offensively obvious, but I really mean look.
Study, follow online - make observation part of your regular routine!
Are you on Instagram? Make a concerted effort to follow creators who have different body types. There are a lot of fat-positive bloggers & creators out there to vibe with! Same applies to Twitter, Youtube, etc - whatever your social media consumption, mix it up and make an active effort to diversify.
And if you’re not the type to regularly consume online real-person-visual-here content, that’s okay! Bookmark a few you like the vibe of, at least, and start checking on them more often - draw a couple random studies as you do so. Not anything you intend to post, but just - to help you get the feel of what that body feels like in it’s core lines, navigation of space, and so on!
Example of the kind of rough sketches I mean-
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First one’s an exploration based on me feeling my own body, second’s referenced from online media, third’s a cross between them, and so on. These were all purposefully on the stylized end, and I focused on the feel of the body most of all.
(...Please note that I’m very sapphic and favor drawing ladies, but this applies to dudes and body types of all genders! I’m working on my dude game atm too, but it’s a WIP for sure, heh. We all gotta start somewhere, and that somewhere for us artists is... our eyeballs!)
((I imagine it goes without saying to study anatomy, from bones to muscles to of course fat itself, but here’s saying that in acknowledgement, anyways. It helps no matter how tedious it may feel to hear the advice ad nauseum XD ))
Follow and study artists that draw different types of bodies!
Maya Kern and Jijidraws (on Twitter) both pop to mind immediately, but there are so many more! I’m an artist that likes stylization, so though I work hard to get irl reference, part of being an artist is dissecting what other artists do to learn and grow on your own.
For example - on chubby/fat bodies, note how the neck & and jawline connect in a gentle slope or rolls! Note how boobs rest on tummy fat with a cat-like mouth (think the w in uwu) rather than a defined round-then-flat ‘skinny’ look. Notice how arm fat falls softly, but there’s still a little elbow definition - and often elbow ‘dimples’! Notice the way leg fat falls, moves, shifts solidly but softly against itself when kneeling... and so on!
Different artists have different ways of boiling these traits down - study ‘em and figure out what’s the core essentials, what works for your level of stylization, and keep applying those things until you get your own flare and can do it naturally.
Feel how your own body feels, and read accounts from others if possible!
No, really. Even if you’re not chubby or fat yourself - feel how your body distributes it’s mass as you bend, twist, hunch, crouch, curl. You’d be surprised how much translates - our squishy bits have to go somewhere, so figure out where that is on yourself! Both by touch/feel, and in the mirror/using the camera on your phone, if possible :)
Biased bit here, but- watch good animation with different body types!
I really like the Ghibli-type approach of stylization where you don’t just draw what you see, but you draw how the thing feels. From tears to laughter, to sleeping, to stomping in frustration, to running! That applies to literally all parts of the body.
Even if you’re not an animator, you can learn and grow so much from studying how animators move different types of bodies (and personalities) through space. Try to figure out why and how, and translate that into your own art! It’ll benefit both in helping variety in your character designs, and in portraying how they carry themselves, regardless of their shape.
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These are just a few tips, but they’re the core of it. When in doubt, observe! But don’t think that just means still-life, fancy nude studies - though those are important and helpful too - basically, be mindful of the choices you’re making.
Use reference for everything, until it’s freakin’ second nature - and even then, use reference! And observe other artists work just as much as real life - every act of creation is in fact an act of remixing, and that’s okay - heck, that’s the beautiful, wonderful thing about creating. We’re all building off one another, and ideally, pulling one another up with each other as we go :)
Godspeed, and happy chubby drawing!! :D
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ironxkid · 3 years
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3. What is their relationship like with their parents or siblings? Is there a reason for it being that way? 4. Did their family have any notable or odd traditions that carry through to their daily life now? 5. What sort of life lessons, if any, did their parents/guardians teach them? Did they stick?
Family Matters
3. What is their relationship like with their parents or siblings? Is there a reason for it being that way? 
I’m gonna break it down with person to person to make it easy dfgjdfhj
Tony: she adores her father! She absolutely looks up to him, he’s absolutely her hero, and I’d say they’re quite close! But, it’s... a little complicated. Carter definitely learned some bad coping mechanisms/habits from him, and she’s codependent on him (not his fault), which... doesn’t do any good for their relationship. She puts herself in his shadow and it’s choking her, something she knows, but she’s afraid to leave, so it’s... not good. She needs to let herself be her own person to really get her footing and find who she truly is outside of being his daughter (something she tends to reduce herself to), so their relationship could be better! But, it’s not the worst
Maya: it’s... complicated. Carter doesn’t really know how to feel about her biological mother. A part of her wishes she got to know her - wishes she had been able to talk to her, especially about her work. But at the same time, there is a part of her that’s bitter towards Maya, and a part of her that feels betrayed. She tries not to think about it, but she does wonder why Maya gave her up to begin with (she brushes it off as Maya being more invested in her work than her, but it’s something that feeds into her fear of abandonment, because if her mother could give her up as a baby to someone who, by all means, probably wasn’t the best to be in charge of an infant, what’s there stopping everyone else from leaving her?), and can’t help but associate her with extremis. Which... includes literally everything that happened in IM3. But Carter knows Maya tried getting Killian to let Tony go - knows Maya died in the process, and... doesn’t know how to feel about it. So, while their relationship is nonexistent, it’s still messy
Pepper: she adores Pepper! Pepper’s definitely been a more solid figure in her life since she was a kid, and someone she’s been able to talk to when she couldn’t talk to her father for whatever reason. She’s always seen her as a mother figure, albeit is very nervous about saying anything to suggest it until later down the line, but I’d say their relationship is pretty good!
Morgan: oh, Carter adores her little sister and will Not hesitate to fight anyone who hurts her. Of course, she does find her annoying at times and doesn’t always want to deal with her, but at the end of the day she does love her and she wants to do everything she can to be a good older sibling to her! Carter does try to be a good role model and is careful with how she acts around her, because she doesn’t want Morgan picking up on the same stuff she did when she was a kid
4. Did their family have any notable or odd traditions that carry through to their daily life now? 
hmm... honestly, I’m not too sure about this one! I’d say maybe some big thing with Christmas, since Tony seemed to go all out with the bunny alone in IM3 lol, but... going off of that, it’s definitely not something Carter would carry now. Christmas... has kinda been ruined for her due to everything that happened in IM3, and the fact it sounds like IM1 took place around Christmas? Definitely before, and I wanna it takes place during the winter, so uhhh... trauma for Christmas!!
other than that I’m drawing a blank on other things tbh fsghjfd 
5. What sort of life lessons, if any, did their parents/guardians teach them? Did they stick?
ooh, hmm. Well, Tony definitely encouraged her to stay curious, if that counts as a life lesson! Whatever she was interested in, he encouraged her to look more into it, and would get into it with her, so she had someone to ramble to! Which definitely helped with her confidence as a kid, since she didn’t have a lot of it and was used to being ignored by her classmates, so having at least one person who listened was good
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Capernoited
to be slightly intoxicated or tipsy
The party is bright and loud and almost too much forNathaniel, though given that he stepped off a six-hour flight less than eighthours ago, he feels that his exhaustion isn’t unreasonable.
But, to Darryl’s credit, the party is fairly tame by hisusual standards — there are only two colors of streamers, and no one has even triedto put a funny hat on him. That might also be because, for whatever reason, theparty is being hosted at Heather and Hector’s condo, and Nathaniel isreasonably certain that Heather would enjoy seeing him out of his element. Butall she does, after the initial cheering and hellos, is give him a long, amusedglance, a pat on the arm, and a comment about being impressed that he didn’tmanage to die of some exotic disease before wandering away.
He would definitely bet that Heather was the one to remembernot to make every snack offering made of starch, and there are several goodfruit and vegetable platters among the spread. He does smile at the pretzelslaid out in a vague Guatemala-esque configuration, and even picks out a plainone for later consumption.
The pretzel-maker herself is in attendance, of course -she’d sprung out of the crowd and caught him in an unfortunately brief butenthusiastic hug earlier in the evening, with her arms up and over hisshoulders, going up on tiptoe to extend her reach. But then he’d been drawnaway by Whijo and Vic, and she had bounced over to another cluster in the room.Apart from a small pang, he tries not to be too disappointed – everyone hasbeen busy with their lives and are trying to catch up with each other as muchas with him. And it’s…nice, to be considered a part of this group, no matterhow weird, and realize that he fits here as well as anyone.
Naturally, there is also alcohol, and by ten in the evening mostof the guests are at least tipsy. Nathaniel is only a little buzzed, but enoughto duck around AJ and Maya’s spirited debate on Gone Girl’s feminism inorder to sneak out to the porch. It’s still a warm night, but it isn’t humid,and he enjoys the open, dry air after the pressing clamor of the bodies andconversations inside.
That, naturally enough, is when Rebecca pounces.
He doesn’t even see her coming – she barrels into him justout of his sightline, wrapping her arms snugly around his waist, and when hetwists to look down at her, he finds her grinning up at him like she’s gettingaway with something.
“Hey,” she says.
“Hey,” he echoes right back, settling his arms carefullyaround her shoulders, and yes, she’s definitely going to get away withsomething, if such a simple exchange makes him feel that sudden, inexplicablefondness for her again, as sturdy as if he had never left at all. Not tomention how completely her gaze catches him, field of vision both expanding tomap every detail and contracting so that there is nothing else in his focus buther.
“I never gave you a proper hello, did I?” she says lowly,eyes fluttering half-closed.
In another time, that would have definitely been aninnuendo. Truthfully, Nathaniel wouldn’t be surprised if that’s what she’strying to go for right now, but her careless tone is too open for it to beanything serious.
“Oh?” he plays along, leaning down towards her, like theyare sharing a secret; moving slowly and keeping his eyes locked with hers sothat he won’t look at her lips by mistake. “What counts as a properhello?”
She giggles and goes up on her toes, pushing her facedangerously close to his. 
“Hel-lo,” she sings, right in his ear, and dissolves intolaughter. Nathaniel winces but laughs, jerking away with a playful frown. She’sclose enough that he catches the scent of something sharp and fruity on herbreath.
Ah, that explains the demonstrativeness.
“How’s the bar tonight?”
Rebecca’s nose wrinkles in distaste.  “Eh. I’ve onlyhad, like, a drink and a half.”
“What happened to the other half?”
She scrunches up her face. “It might have been tippeddown the sink.”
“No good?”
“It was disgusting,” she assures him, all seriousness. 
“Blame the bartender.”
“Can’t,” she mumbles, eyes drifting closed. “She just tellsme to order better next time.” 
She leans into him, and he shifts his hold to keep herupright, trying not to think about the familiar weight of her in his arms.
“Uh-huh. Come on, let’s get you sitting down.”
Gently, Nathaniel guides her to the porch seat, and sitsdown beside her. She lets him but catches his hands in hers when he tries to drawaway, give her space. He looks down at their entwined fingers and tamps downhard on the tendril of hope that tries to worm its way out of his generalaffectionate feelings for her. It’s ridiculous; barely twelve hours officiallyback in the States and he’s nearly lost again.
He waits for her to let go, but she doesn’t, releasing hishands only to twine her arms around him again in a surprisingly strong grip.
“A drink and a half is less than three,” she begins, afamiliar kind of non-sequitur.
“That is how math usually works, yes,” agrees Nathaniel,teasing, trying not to smile too broadly. He’s forgotten how easy it is to justlook at her and just feel happy, a feeling that never seemed to have anycorrelation to whether they were together or not.
Rebecca rolls her eyes at him, still smiling. “What Imean is that I’m a little tipsy. A little loose. But I am, distinctly, notinebriated.”
“Okay.”
“So what I’m about to say right now can be taken quiteseriously,” she insists, eyes wide and eyebrows angling sharply down.
“All right,” he agrees, because Rebecca clearly has a goalin mind, everything about her face and body language and tone radiating pureintent, and the best thing he can do right now is listen to what she has tosay, and not presume anything. Rebecca gives a tiny nod, apparently satisfied.
“I’ve missed you.”
“I know,” he says, and means it in earnest. She hasn’t saidit in so few words, but he’s known. Every time she sent him a message, or anarticle warning him about caimans. When he came back last year for Valentine’sDay and she said in public that she was in awe of him and later, in private, repeatedthe sentiment, and then asked why he couldn’t have gone somewhere that was lessof a schlep to be in awe of.
(He didn’t read too much into it, he knows better than thatnow, but those words have definitely lingered in the back of his mind, thislast year.)
“I missed you too,” he returns, because she is clearlywaiting for a response. “I’m glad to be back. Tired, but glad.”
Rebecca screws up her face in exaggerated empathy, promptinglaughter.
“I told Darryl to wait at least a day,” she says,utterly long-suffering. “But there’s only so much you can do once he hashis mind on a party. But I don’t want to talk about Darryl to you.”
“Oh?”
“No. I wanted to tell you I missed you.”
“You just did,” he teases, trying to play it light, despitehow his pulse hammers as her arms tighten around him, as if determined not tolet him slip away.
(As if he would ever want to.)
Her mouth firms up. “Well, yeah, but no.”
“No?”
“That’s not all I wanted to say,” she says, impatiently,like he’s the one not making sense. “I wanted to say that I miss you and Ithink about you right about…here,” she gestures around the space above her headvaguely. “And here.”
She taps her breastbone, and it feels like she has reachedbetween them, instead, the sharp give and tightening of his heart that hasnothing (and everything) to do with her grip on him.
“Oh?” he says, trying to be light, reminding himself thatnot-quite-drunk still isn’t sober, even if her eyes are clear and fiercewith that Rebecca Bunch determination. “It’s like that, huh?”
“Oh yeah,” says Rebecca, popping her eyes wide, thenlaughing, bright and quick, that reassures him that she isn’t entirely too-fargone. When she blinks up at him again, her gaze is steady. “You have no idea. Itsucked, missing you. You’re so tall, it’s always obvious that you’re missing. Like,in all the group photos. And I know that you were living your best life andeverything in the jungle, but I just wanna say that I’m really, really gladthat you figured out that your best life isn’t like, only possible in thejungle.”
“It was never going to be only in the jungle,” saysNathaniel, amused that she would ever think he could stay away for such anextended time. “I told you I was going to come back. Multiple times.”
For the first time since they’ve started talking, Rebeccalooks away from him, her intensity softening into something he might almostcall uncertainty.
“I know,” she says softly. “You did. And you always do. Ijust needed to have you physically next to me, you know?”
“I know. You’re actually cutting off my circulation.”
“Oops.” Guiltily, she loosens her arms and he can breathe alittle easier, even if his pulse is still hammering in his ears. “Sorry. But,listen, but we need to address this—this thing, between us.” She flaps ahand between them, smacking him hard in the chest and making him wince. “Thatthing we keep sending pictures and text messages and emojis around.”
Nathaniel would be lying if he said he wasn’t expecting thisturn. But he’d have thought (foolishly, he can see that now) that Rebecca wouldgive him a few days to settle back down before bringing up the ‘where do westand’ conversation. She turned him down, he left the country, and while theircorrespondence was always normal between friends, they never actually did aproper post-mortem on their relationship.
“Right.” He shouldn’t ask, he shouldn’t ask, for the samereasons why they are not going to talk to each other right now, but he has toat least try to be prepared. “The kind of talk you had with Greg and Josh? Aclean break, clean slate kind of thing?”
These are not questions he wants to ask. But if there’ssomething he’s learned these last three years, it’s that if it is a hardquestion to answer, it’s worth trying.
Rebecca looks up at him, eyes glimmering from the faintillumination cast by the porch light fixture.
“Not the exact same talk,” she says, but not as fastas she normally does – she goes slowly, carefully enunciating, and while thereis still a shakiness to the sounds, it is a Rebecca who is clearly within hercapabilities. “I don’t think you can get a cleaner break than continental lines.”
“True, but that didn’t stop us from talking about otherthings.”
“And I don’t think that was a bad thing. I really likedtalking to you these past two years, Nathaniel. But, I think, since we arefinally going to be inhabiting the same town again, we just need to figure outsomething…sensible. A lot of things have changed around here, not just me.”
“I know,” says Nathaniel.
“And honestly…it’s a talk, not the talk. Justto clear the air about where we wanna go with this as-of-yet-unspoken thing.It can always be revisited and…expanded, as need be.”
“Right.”
“And it’s…gonna be a lot, not gonna lie. But some things youjust have to talk through. A lot of talking. And, also unfortunately speaking fromexperience here, there might also be crying. Lots of crying.”
“I don’t cry that much,” Nathaniel’s protest is automatic,even if he can’t quite help but laugh, knowing that it’s not true (whatever, hecan at least try to deny it). His laugh is a little too loud, has been sincehe’s started spending the majority of his time not thinking of his father, butRebecca responds like she’s been waiting for that sound, like it’s somethingshe wants to hear again.
“Uh huh,” she hums, looking at him, amused. “Don’t try to thinkyou can fool me. You’re a crier.”
“I just don’t remember it that way,” says Nathaniel, affectinghis most haughtiest manner, well aware that he’s already lost if he’s fallingback on that one.
“Give it up. Paula told on you. And Darryl. And Heather—”
“Okay, you’ve made your point,” says Nathaniel withexaggerated exasperation, because he’s better at acknowledging his emotions butthat doesn’t mean he has lost all of his secondhand embarrassment. “And you’reright. Crying or not, we should talk.”
Rebecca smiles again at him and nuzzles into his shoulderand the crook of his neck. Cautiously, he tilts his head so that it restsagainst hers.
They sit like that for a while, listening to the murmur ofvoices just inside.
“This is nice,” Rebecca murmurs into the fabric of hisshirt.
“Yeah,” agrees Nathaniel. “But if we don’t get inside soon,I’m just going to fall asleep out here and wake up with a crick in my neck. Andyou won’t be that much better off.”
“Yeah. That’s a shame,” says Rebecca around a yawn. “Ithought we could try the hot tub.”
“Afraid not. I don’t have my swimsuit.”
Rebecca waggles her eyebrows at him, a spark of old mischiefin her eyes. “Who says you need one?”
Nathaniel grimaces. “Gross.”
“Or, is it sexy?”
“No way. It’s unsanitary, and Heather would actually kill me.Or, even worse, make me unclog it.”
“No, she wouldn’t.”
“You’re right: she’d just kill me.”
“Not if I asked her not to.”
 “Not sure I wannatake that risk.”
She pouts fiercely up at him, and he grins.
“Fine,” agrees Rebecca begrudgingly. “Too bad. I definitelythought about you many a time in that hot tub.”
Last year, that would have been enough to make Nathanielcompletely lose his composure, but not now. As it is, he can feel his earsburning, and he’s not blushing, he’s not, but it’s a close thing.
“Well, don’t stop on my account,” says Nathaniel, helpingher stand so they can go back inside. Rebecca snickers.
“Wasn’t gonna.”
It’s good to be back.
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bigskycastle · 5 years
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Yup! I’m gonna use this ask to answer the other ones finally lol
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Hehe that’s a cute idea.. that’s sort of what I imagined the “special ready” effect is, but it would definitely be cooler if instead of just glowing/moving a bit their hair cycled through a bunch of colors
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Hi! Oh that’s pretty broad uhhhhhhhh id say.. well. it’s N from pokemon bw but most of the characters I end up liking are just, like, silent protags lol
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Honestly? at first nervous and uncomfortable because I very much forgot how to draw humans. But i’m feeling tons better about it now and having a lot of fun with it^_^
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Awh thank you ! ❤ you’re also cool
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Good at the moment! Got a 4 day weekend every week now so I should (maybe?) be able to be more active here. Also FINALLY have a doctor’s apptmt today so i can see someone about my mental health shit and possibly, perhaps, potentially actually get help lol
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You’re sweet, thank you❤ I’d like to redo my spectrum piece at some point just because i think i’ve evolved a little stylistically since I finished it, but I still like it despite that. And ty again! They’re very relaxing for me now lol, I’m glad we (against all odds) got a zelda game with one
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I think I first saw a streamer playing it when I dropped by their twitch page on a whim, and I saw all the clothing options and immediately decided “i must buy a switch just to play this game”. The fashion aspect is still one of my favorite things about it lol. 
I think my Favorite part has to be the singleplayer modes, in partic agents though (predictably), bc they’re exactly the sort of “mostly blank slate” characters+worlds I get attached to.. I’ve always rly enjoyed sort of filling in the gaps left behind in media, even if that means what I end up loving at the end is 90% headcanon stuff. I think that’s the best way 2 interact with media anyway. making it more personal. 
It’s always very cool seeing everyone’s different takes on the agents/splat world, and it’s Very cool how I can post a pic of, like, agent 3 and have a bunch of different people each see a totally different character, you know? But yeah i like the shoes in splatoon
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Honestly kinda rough but I’m trying! I’ve started college now and the people there are nice enough, plus it’s got incredibly cushy hours and is pretty light on actual “learning”, but it’s good, I needed some kind of break from academia before I straight up died
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I’m happy you enjoy it anon!!!!!! I will :-)! I’ve got a lot planned for zelda art in the near future, i just have to finish some commissions and stuff before I can properly work on it
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I’ve never “studied” officially, but i’ve been drawing for like, 5-6ish years now? I didn’t pick it up until I was about 10 and didn’t rly commit until I was maybe 12. The course i took at college is meant to be art-focused, however, the stuff they’re teaching is like.. not a brag! but stuff I do already know. Like, a tutor tried to explain what “pixel art” is to me on my first day. I mostly took it to try and learn some Maya skills because I do want to pick up 3D art one day!
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Ty! This question’s pretty similar to the last so i’ll put it here. I’ve been slacking on my actual studying a bit, most of what I do is force myself to draw anything every day. Doesnt matter if its a wonky doodle of a face on the back of a napkin or if its a full illust, its practice, it counts. Also, trying to shove myself out of my own comfort zone by doing things like environments and very detailed things (motorcycle.). It’s very rewarding just to look at something you made and think “I thought this was impossible before right now”.
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hmmmmMm... I can’t think of any just off the top of my head but my friend @nickymemer (I think?) put the idea of Zelda, whenever shes sick of link and her dads’ collective shit, just running off to gerudo town to hang out with urbosa and the rest of the gerudo court, in my head and i love that a lot
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Thank you thank you! As of rn it’s botw but that’s probably because it’s the only one i’ve played by myself. I watched a 30 hour longplay of twilight princess and really loved that though. I did watch an lp of both majora and ocarina but I get the feeling i’m missing a big part of the experience of both bc i’m not playing them. (That or they’re overhyped.) If i get a bit more cash at some point I’ll probably get both on my 3ds.
Alright that’s all I think! Thank you everyone ❤
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schraubd · 5 years
Text
The Good Place: Final Thoughts
*MAJOR SPOILERS*
At the conclusion of season three, I registered my prediction of how The Good Place would end:
The abolition of the afterlife in its entirety (no more good or bad places); a re-emphasis on doing as best you can when it matters (i.e., during one's actual life); the core quartet is sent back to Earth to live out the rest of their natural lives as friends.
I would say that, like most religions, I got about 5% right. The afterlife, as we knew it, is abolished. And the series does end with all of the human characters passing on. But in between, The Good Place takes a much more audacious swing: a genuine attempt to reform the afterlife. And -- and I think this is perhaps even more profound -- an essential acknowledgment that this attempt fell short. A perfect paradise was not created, and in fact the final conclusion of The Good Place seems to be that such a paradise is impossible even in concept. After all, cut away the underbrush and the heroes' solution to the problem afflicting The Good Place was to offer the choice of suicide. And while the penultimate episode suggests that perhaps just having the option will suffice to stave off the ennui of eternal bliss, the finale refuses to accept that out. Every human character, eventually, kills themselves. Their happy ending is that they are content to die. The best possible paradise is one where people can and do eventually choose to erase themselves from existence. Skip over the beatific forest setting and the stipulation of emotional contentment, and that's a rather melancholic, if not outright grim, conclusion. It's easy to draw a parallel between the last episode and the need for fans to accept the voluntarily-chosen end of a great show like The Good Place (it's even easier to draw it to the need to accept our own mortality). But another recurrent theme in The Good Place is the failure of systems. Over and over again, the systems the characters find themselves in are revealed to be either malfunctioning or outright designed to immiserate them. From the very beginning, Eleanor and Chidi confront the brutal harshness of the points system, which results in nearly all people being horrifically tortured for eternity (incidentally, that Chidi isn't immediately repelled by -- and suspicious of -- this set-up is a rare miscue in terms of characterization, if not plotting). They resolve to try and improve Eleanor, only to find out that they're actually in a perpetual torture chamber which will literally reset every time they come close to escaping it. At this point, the series becomes a repeated effort to find ever-higher levers in the celestial bureaucracy that can be appealed to. They find a judge, who is at best indifferent to their predicament and not particularly interested in helping them. Upon returning to earth, they discover first that they can't ever improve enough to enter The Good Place (because -- knowing the stakes -- their motivations are corrupt) and then that nobody can successfully enter The Good Place because existence has become too interwoven and morally interdependent for anyone to satisfy the standard of admission. They meet the actual Good Place committee, who are worse than useless and content to let everyone suffer forever because taking any concrete action risks violating some procedural norm. And when they finally enter The Good Place, they discover it's as dysfunctional as everywhere else -- gradually sucking the life out of its residents who, given eternity, eventually tire of everything. All the systems fail. All of them are doomed to fail. They can't not. Hence, the suicide gate (and sidenote: If The Good Place ever has a spin-off series -- and lord knows it shouldn't -- it should definitely involve exploring the first murder in the Good Place when someone gets involuntarily shoved through that archway). By the time it reaches its conclusion, The Good Place is one of the few depictions of the afterlife to take the concept of eternity seriously. Some other venues glance in this direction. Agent Smith in The Matrix tells Neo that humans reject a simulation of paradise -- the implication is because we're diseased, but perhaps also indicating that perfect, eternal happiness ... isn't. Maya Rudolph's other afterlife vehicle, Forever, certainly touches on this theme. The Order of the Stick has an afterlife where people can eat all the food and have all the sex and otherwise satisfy all the "messed-up urges you people have leftover after having your soul stuck in a glorified sausage all your life". But this is only the "first tier" of heaven: once you're bored, you can "climb the mountain" to search for a higher level of spiritual satisfaction. And while what this entails is left vague, it is not death -- those who ascend can, if they wish, descend back down to the lowlier pleasures (OOTS also introduces the very neat concept of "Postmortum Time Disassociation Disorder"). But the story which provides perhaps the most powerful foil to The Good Place's view of eternity and immortality is (and of the approximately 143,000 Good Place retrospectives being written right now, I bet I'm the only one to make this comparison) Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality. The ultimate adversary in HPMOR is not Snape, or Malfoy, or Voldemort. It is death, and Harry is committed to the "absolute rejection of death as the natural order." The message on the Potters' gravestone is, after all, "The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death" (and it's a sign of my cloistered Jewish upbringing that I thought this was a Rowling original -- it is in fact a quote from I Corinthians). Harry Potter wants people to live forever. And the story anticipates the objection, placed in the mouth of Dumbledore, "What would you do with eternity, Harry?"
Harry took a deep breath. "Meet all the interesting people in the world, read all the good books and then write something even better, celebrate my first grandchild's tenth birthday party on the Moon, celebrate my first great-great-great grandchild's hundredth birthday party around the Rings of Saturn, learn the deepest and final rules of Nature, understand the nature of consciousness, find out why anything exists in the first place, visit other stars, discover aliens, create aliens, rendezvous with everyone for a party on the other side of the Milky Way once we've explored the whole thing, meet up with everyone else who was born on Old Earth to watch the Sun finally go out, and I used to worry about finding a way to escape this universe before it ran out of negentropy but I'm a lot more hopeful now that I've discovered the so-called laws of physics are just optional guidelines."
The last few episodes of The Good Place are, in a sense, a calling of this bluff. Even if you play out the string all the way to extinguishment of the sun or the heat death of the universe -- well, forever is a long time. It can wait. Harry argues that the only reason we accept death is because we're used to it, and if you took someone who lived in a world where there was no death and asked them if they'd prefer to live in a universe where eventually people ceased to exist, they'd look at you like you're crazy. The Good Place provocatively argues the precise opposite -- that if death didn't exist, people would have to invent it. Or they would go crazy, with infinite time on their hands. And so we are, perhaps, back to where we started. The paradise the heroes create is certainly better than that which they replaced. But it still is deeply, tragically flawed -- and The Good Place seems to believe that these flaws are fundamentally inescapable. The suicide option is the clearest manifestation of how cracked paradise must be, but there is another issue that the show alludes to: paradise depends on other people, and on their choices. Way back in the first season, "Real Eleanor" raises this precise point: if her soulmate doesn't love her, "this will never truly be my Good Place." Sure it's actually a contrivance to torture Chidi, but it's easy to imagine it as real. What if your paradise is to live blissfully with a certain special someone and ... that person doesn't love you back? Both Simone and Tahani seem okay with Chidi and Jason respectively choosing someone other than them (Eleanor and Janet). But that's in harmony with the audience's happy ending. It's not hard to imagine a different world where they were less sanguine about it. Or take a far more direct problem: If paradise comes with a suicide option, what happens if your loved one takes it? Harry's excited declaration of all the things he'd do with infinite time is not fundamentally, the reason why he desires immortality. When push comes to shove, he's motivated by a far more basic yearning: to make it so "people won't have to say goodbye any more." Eleanor's utter panic at the thought of losing Chidi forever was, for me at least, the most visceral emotional gut-punch of the entire series -- even more than the finale of season three (at least there, we could be reasonably assured their separation was temporary). She eventually comes to terms with it. But sit on it a little more: imagine a "paradise" where your soulmate has left you forever. People fantasize about heaven to be reunited with their loved ones, yet we end up looping right back into eternal separation. What kind of paradise is this, where people still have to say goodbye? So we have two problems that seem to threaten even the conceptual coherency of a paradise:
First, if paradise is forever, eventually everything will become tired. That suicide is presented as a good solution to this problem shows just how serious it is (and, for what it's worth, I'm not sure the suicide "option" would necessarily bring relief. It could easily generate crippling anxiety -- a sense of trappedness between the irrevocable permanence of death and the unbearable ennui of existence). 
Second, if paradise depends on the choices other people make, how can we be sure they'll make choices compatible with your happy ending?
The Good Place presents the first problem as unavoidable and skates past the second entirely. But could they be overcome? Maybe. In the penultimate episode of The Good Place, one solution proposed to the problem of eternal ennui is to reset people's memories, so the things that bored them become fresh again. This is swiftly rejected as a repetition of how the quartet was tortured in The Bad Place. Too swiftly, in my view. Neighborhoods were also used to torture -- should those be jettisoned too? The problem with eternity is that eventually, everything gets repetitive. Go-Kart Racing against monkeys may be a blast the first time, but it loses its luster after a million reiterations. The wistfulness comes from wishing one could go back to that initial burst of discovery and experience -- before one had the memory of doing it all over again. This was my immediate solution to the ennui problem -- not that some demon should periodically reset you, but that you should be able to choose when, where, and how to reset yourself. It's not just about going back in time. It's reoccupying any memory state you've ever possessed. Go back to before you ever raced against monkeys -- then zoom forward to when you've already experienced all the monkey-races you could handle. It's like a load/save system for your mind. Hell, you can even adjust the "difficulty" level. It's true that, for many, a "paradise" where one simply automatically gets whatever one wants will feel unsatisfying. But one needn't set the parameters of paradise to guarantee success. It can be as hard or easy as one wants; people can be as pliant or obstinate as one likes (not for nothing is one of the afterlife attractions in OOTS -- a fantasy roleplaying-based setting -- "The Dungeon of Monsters That Are Just Strong Enough to Really Challenge You"). Or dream bigger. If one has infinite ability to reverse and remake memory as one wishes, then one could at any point adapt any set of memories one ever could have had. Don't just live a different life, remember a different life. Then jump forward and remember all the different lives you lived -- each of which (when you lived them) you had erased the memories of all the others. Every single possible timeline is lived -- and can be relived in all its glory, as many times as one wants. For me, at least, this dissolves the problem of others' choices as well. If anyone can make not just any possible choice, but live through any possible timeline, what does it mean to ask which one is "real"? If your paradise involves loving and being loved by a particular someone, will in your paradise, the person you need to love you, loves you, and stays with you as long as you need. In their paradise, they might love someone else. You enjoy a timeline where people choose exactly the choices that would make you most happy; they live in a timeline which is the same for them. Of course, the sorts of philosophical questions that would raise (among others: What does it mean for the "same" person to simultaneously exist across multiple timelines? Who, exactly, is "choosing" which version they occupy? And if the one that does choose doesn't choose a timeline that involves them loving you back, is the version that does love you really "them"?) are even more esoteric and less accessible to a network audience than the moral philosophy questions The Good Place did try to introduce. So I don't blame them for skipping by it.
* * *
The last enemy to be defeated may not, after all, be death. It may be time.  Time ruins all things. Eventually you run out of it. And even if you never ran out of it -- you had infinite time -- it would defeat you in a different way: via boredom, repetition, and ennui. We can, perhaps, imagine a world where we vanquish death. But can we imagine one where (forgot about possibility, and just think conceptually) we defeat time? I can. Barely, but I can. Of course, it's in many ways a moot point, since I'm profoundly skeptical that humanity ever will master time in this way -- or even if it's practically possible (that it won't happen in my lifetime is actually less material, given that if it ever did happen we'd probably be at Omega Point anyway). But at least it holds out the possibility of an actual happy ending -- where the last enemy is truly vanquished, and nobody has to say goodbye. via The Debate Link https://ift.tt/2GK19Yo
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reytatouille · 5 years
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hey so your fjord model completely blew me away; do you have any process pics? If not, can you explain a little of your process, for both fjord and beau? absolutely stunning.
Hey !
Thank you, that’s super nice ! I usually post my progress on Twitter but I can make a recap here ;D
1 - First thing first I make a base model in 3Dsmax. I know a lot of people start in ZBrush directly but A) I am not comfortable enough when it comes to creating from scratch in ZBrush and B) I don’t have to do retopology when I’m done he he. I also think it’s easier to manage a shape with a few points rather than sculpt in it but that’s a personal preference so if you’re more at ease with sculpting, go for it ! For this model I tried to stay relatively low poly (and then people from Ubi told me their models were up to 50K and I realized I could have put more edges).
The ropes are still splines at that point and are not transferred to ZBrush. I later used this tutorial to make a high poly version that was then baked on the low poly:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OxAYvMs117I&t=120s
I put a placeholder for the hair so I could see what the silhouette would look like eventually. 
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When I’m done I send the model over to ZBrush !
2 - I import each asset in .obj one by one, starting with the body. To avoid ZBrush making mush out of my shapes when subdividing them, I add one level of subdivision, then come back to the now slightly different first level of subdiv and reimport my original asset. That way it regains its original form and I keep my levels of subdivisions. This method can create some artefact on squared shapes but it’s the only one I found that worked.
When working in ZBrush I try to apply some tips I’ve learned from watching FlippedNormals’ tutorials and work by levels of details: low, middle and high-frequency. Here is the video that explains it the best but I really recommend most of their channel, you learn a ton of important principles when it comes to sculpting ! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKstQNoI2w0
Second important tip: never work with the default orange material, it lies to you.
ZBrush is also a good moment to check my overall proportions and anatomy. I use the Transpose Master in ZPlugin to make my different subtools one, I move and resize everything that feels off and then I reconvert them into separate objects. You don’t loose any subdivision information and it’s completely undoable so it’s very handy !Another thing when working with ZBrush: step back and look at the whole thing from time to time. Remember where your area of focus should be and check that you didn’t overdo it in areas that shouldn’t draw the focus away. For exemple at the beginning I had spent a lot of time on the folds of the boots at the ankles. Turns out the hard shadows they created were catching the eye too much and drawing the attention away from the face. So I smoothed them down a bit. 
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When I’m done with the sculpt it’s time to do some UVs !
3 - For that part I come back to 3dsmax. I use the ZPlugin “FBX Import/Export” to transfer everything at the lowest subdivision level. And then it’s UVs, yay ! I’m not going to explain how to make UVs, I’ll just say I used two UDIMs, one for the whole body and one for the face. Looking back three would have been nice since the hood is too low definition for being so close to the face. I used a checker to make sure all the UVs have the same size.
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Beautiful, I know.
When the UVs are done I export each asset one by one in .OBJ to update the ZBrush model. There again I go back to the first level of subdivision and I reimport, it keeps my higher levels of subdiv.
Ok now we have a low poly version and a high poly it is time for texturing and… baking. Oh dear I hate that part.
4 - So, I’m gonna be honest, when it comes to baking normal maps ZBrush has always been the death of me, and since Substance Painter was involved in my process I decided to do everything in Substance. It was my first time using it so I lost a whole day trying to understand how to make it work :)
Basically you start your project by importing your low poly in .fbx, with every asset named NameOfAsset_low. You then can bake your maps by importing your high poly as a fbx, with every asset in it named NameOfAsset_high. And then ask Substance to “match by name”. 
And then time to work ! I can’t really give tips on Substance to be honest, I’m very new at it, but there are tons of very good tutorials out there ! I worked using PBR Metallic Roughness. I made the opacity map for the edges of the cloth by simply taking the smallest brush size I could and painting threads. There’s one thing a recruiter told me once about Substance, that vaguely sounded like “With Substance kids these days don’t know how to paint textures, it’s all automatic”. So I think using the materials available in substance is nice, but you need to work over them after that. FlippedNormals’ channel has videos on Substance and how to think while texturing so I recommend checking those !
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Then I just exported all my maps and put them on my model ! For Substance to Arnold there is a good video explaining in which slot goes which map: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgiZ-ZOEPNg&t=2103s
5 - And now… the hair. The hair was a first too, and it was quite difficult. 
I learned the principle of the method from this video (it’s a very interesting interview with the guy who made the hair for Horizon Zero Dawn):https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z58OQ9x0E68
And I found another tutorial that used the method but with tools I knew how to use (I have never touched xgen in maya and the fibermesh in ZBrush seemed more approachable): https://www.artstation.com/artwork/GW9JB
For baking I used 3dsmax (you really need to up the global supersampler to get something not horrible) and xNormals. 
When I had all my hair strands all pretty and baked I started placing them. I think I put way too many of them and I would certainly do things a little differently but the method itself is good, I think you just need practice to get better results. For the eyebrows and lashes I couldn’t get something satisfying on ZBrush so I painted the maps by hand. The normal map is a combination of xNormals’ HeightToNormal baking and handpainted normal.
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And we’re not done yet ! Because that’s a three weeks of work model. 
6 - The rig and skin. I’ll just say I used a CAT from 3dsmax. Those are extremely easy to learn and use with tutorials on youtube and they can really bring a character to life. I merged most of the objects together and then skinned them to the CAT. Here you need to know anatomy but if you want references you can check out Hippydrome, a handy website for modelers and riggers showing where articulations should be and how they work. It can also help with good topology ! https://hippydrome.com/
7 - Lighting and rendering. I used Arnold on 3dsmax for rendering everything. It’s very simple to use once you’ve learned the basics: 
A) for the light settings you use intensity first, exposure second, and you change the color using temperature (Kelvin)B) for rendering settings you start low, you check where the noise is and you up the corresponding samples 
For lighting I used 4 lights. From left to right: a rim light, a key light, a secondary and a fill light. The fill light is a skydome. I used this article to get a good base: https://3dtotal.com/news/inspiration/10-top-tips-for-lighting-and-presenting-your-sculpts-by-james-w-cain-zbrush-hair
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And I think that’s all !
As you can see I spent a lot of time researching tutorials, but in parallel I also asked for a lot of feedback from friends who work in the industry. 
For Beauregard I only did modeling on 3dsmax, UVs, handpainted textures in photoshop, rig/skin and rendering in Arnold. She took me a week. For Fjord I introduced new elements and methods: I decided to use ZBrush and Substance, and I wanted to make hair cards. He took me three weeks.I think starting simple with Beauregard helped me figure out a lot of stuff and made it much easier to work on Fjord after. Struggling every step of the way can be overwhelming and make me loose interest in a personal project, so I really recommend starting small and introducing difficulty and new methods when you’re at ease with the basics. Finished is better than perfect !
I hope this will help you in some way. Don’t hesitate if you have specific questions I’ll be happy to answer as best as I can ! 
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Text
Kuromaya Bodyguard AU
Claudine had too much pride in herself to simply stand by and watch. From a young age, she had always found the art of swordplay quite interesting, and as the soldiers trained in the courtyard, she often took the time from her regular royalty duties and snuck away to watch. Years after her exasperated mother and father grew tired of the girl escaping, they decided to let her train with the soldiers of the castle.
Now, at the age of 18, she was rather exceptional, being able to beat any recruit in just a few blows, and holding herself against the best of the king's men. But it wasn’t just the love of sword play that kept her passion burning throughout the years, it was the Kingsmen's daughter- also known as Maya Tendou, and also known, begrudgingly, as her royal bodyguard.
The two had met not long after Claudine had started her daily training. The right hand of the king, known as Captain Tendou, had come to the palace one day with his daughter in tow. The moment Claudine saw her, she was quick to notice her natural confidence. The girl had a stern look and stood straight and proud like her father. She introduced herself humbly to the others, already gaining liking from the soldiers. But, right away Claudine was wary of the new girl. It was 5 years ago when Maya first came to Claudine, introducing herself.
“Princess.” She said respectfully, bowing to the blonde. Standing straight once again, she spoke. “My name is Maya Tendou. I will be training to be your personal guard. I believe we will be seeing each other often.”
Claudine’s lips curved into an unapproved line, trying not to notice that the brown haired girl was taller than her. She did not need a bodyguard! She could protect herself perfectly fine.
Claudine huffed and to Maya’s surprise drew her wood weapon from its makeshift scabbard. Holding it out in front of her, the point aiming to the sky.
“I challenge you. And I won't lose.”Claudia said stubbornly. We will see who needs the protection here.
The corner of Maya’s mouth curved into a light grin, and her eyes sparked with determination, drawing her wooden sword accepting the challenge confronting her.
Needless to say, that was the day the Claudine Saijo was filled with a new passion. She lost to the skilled girl. Claudine found herself overwhelmed by the pure swiftness of Maya, and it seemed like they were on different levels- like looking up at an overwhelming mountain. Claudine couldn’t stand it.  
Claudine looked up from the cobblestone ground, her sword out of her reach and her hair frazzled.
“I look forward to our relationship.”Maya said, sheathing her sword, as Claudine glared up at her.
5 years passed, and their relationship changed, yet always stayed the same. For the first two years, they grew to be bitter rivals. Maya never showing any acknowledgement to the girl, and Claudine constantly challenging her. Then, on Maya’s 16th birthday, she was knighted as the princesses royal guard.
They went from sparing from the spare hours of the day, to Maya being by Claudine’s side almost every moment. Trips to faraway places, the dinner table, and Claudia’s lessons with the castle teachers. At first, it drove Claudine to madness. But the blonde girl got used to her rival’s invigorating presence. Her little teases and quips about Claudine’s everyday life and events began to be routine and the times when Maya’s presence was requested elsewhere, it felt oddly lonely. They grew to know each other better than anyone in the castle.
One thing that did not change was their competitiveness to beat each other. Claudine still had not won a single battle against her bodyguard, and it drove her to frustration. That frustration was then used and turned into determination to show Maya Tendou that she could protect herself, something she had failed to prove on day one. If there was one thing Claudine vowed to do before her life ended on this earth was to beat Maya Tendou.
Their training became more and more intense, and every day they sparred each other at least once. Without even knowing it, their daily battle became something Claudine ooked forward to. At the end of every spar, it ended the same, with Claudine on the ground and Maya with a victorious smirk on her face, holding out a hand for her rival. It took a while for Claudine to learn to accept the gesture, pushing down her pride.
The two girls had become very close over the recent years, and they soon learned that nothing could separate them. They knew each other's likes, dislikes- little quirks and habits. Yet there was always a fine line between them.
Maya being her bodyguard, had a duty- and that meant, while often poking at Claudine with small playful comments, she often kept to herself and stayed cautious. Always professional, never unguarded. Often it annoyed Claudine (for what reason she didn't know) but that line stopped them from getting further in their relationship. A princess and her guard, that is all they seemed to be.
But Claudine wasn't a fool. Out of the corner of her eye at times she saw Maya looking at her. A gaze that made her cheeks blush lightly with color and embarrassment. Whenever she turned her head at all, then the look would instantly snap away, back onto high alert like nothing had happened.  
Claudine would see the way that Maya would glare at flirting boys or soldiers that got too close, causing them to cower and leave the princess be. The way her brow furrowed when she spoke to possible suitors that her father arranges for her (if she had to choice, she would avoid them at all costs).
It would be a lie to say Claudine didn't think Maya was beautiful. Her soft brown locks that flowed down to her shoulders. The old blue bow that was tied in her hair. The tall, lean body that used a blade like an extension of her own arm…
Claudine definitely did not think about those things. Her rival. Her bodyguard. They kept it strictly professional of course. She wouldn't have it any other way.
Except for the times that line was crossed, just a tad.
“1,2,3 1,2,3 and- stop! Truly you two are remarkable!” Claudine's dance instructor praised, looking upon them with pride.
Claudine at the moment, was partnered with Maya for the lesson. Although she denied the need of a partner, the teacher strongly insisted otherwise.
“It is just not the same alone. This is a very intimate dance, something that you and your future suitor will dance at your wedding.” The woman seemed to daydream to herself, looking off with a smile.
Meanwhile, Mayas arm around Claudine's waist tightened and the two became closer than before. A smirk appeared in her features as she laced their fingers together and looked down a but at the princess in her hold.
“You are not afraid, are you? It's just a dance.”
Claudine set her lips into a fine line, hating how the bodyguard could read her so easily. It wasn't that she was afraid...but irritated.
Even in dance, Maya could keep up with her - no, surpass her so easily. Like everything came naturally. It was frustrating. And so that lead to determination.
In retaliation against Maya's statement she trailed her left hand from the guards shoulder to the back of her neck, and leaned up to her ear, letting out a breathy voice.
“I will not lose.”
Claudine herself, was surprised by her own bravado, but did not show the emotion on her face as she pulled back. She managed to catch a glance of wide blinking eyes, before the smirk settled back onto her rivals face.
“Of course.”
This was not the last time they crossed the line.
As time passed, Claudine found herself drawn to Maya. Although the girl was there constantly, she seemed too far out of reach. It was as if Claudiane could feel her presence even from any room. Hyper aware of every movement and shift.  She wanted to be closer. To feel the warmth of Maya's presence.
These feelings not only confused the princess, but also motivated her. The drive to get Maya to truly acknowledge her, to see her as an equal.
This went on until one fateful night. It had been soon after Claudine’s 18th birthday. After her party had been finished and she thanked all her guests, she retreated to her room, tired and drained.
From her open window where light from the slim moon filtered through, she could softly hear outside the cheers and banters of the drunk soldiers, soaked in the left over beer and ale from the party.
Quickly shutting the shutter doors, she let out a heavy breath and relaxed in the peace and quiet, her thoughts wandering to the many conversations with countless guests she had.
Her trance was broken by a knocking on the door. Two knocks, a pause, then another knock.
Right away Claudine knew it was Maya and opened the door, revealing the brown haired woman in her fine drab. Brown dress pants and a red vest over a crisp white shirt. Of course her scabbard and sword were by her side still, even in the fancy attire.
“A tiring night?” She asked, musing in her voice.
Claudine gave her a blank stare then let out a sigh. “Even after all these years, talking is still the most energy draining activity one could participate in.”
A light grin appeared. “A princess has her duties I suppose.” Maya turned a bit to indicate her leaving, but still faced Claudine.
“I just came to make sure you made it back to your room safely...”
Claudine felt a pinch of irritation and her brows furrowed.”I can escort myself to my room just fine.”
“and to say goodnight.” Maya’s eyes squinted a bit with amusement, and she continued her turn to exit the doorway.
“-And I also must say, the color red looks absolutely perfect on you.”
At this point Maya had already begun walking away receding into the darker part if the hallway, leaving Claudine to stew in her own embarrassment and fluster. Her cheeks had taken the color of her dress and her grip on the door knob tightened before closing the door with a click.
“Annoying…”She fumed, trying to rid the warm feeling from her face.
Although still reeling from the thoughts of the recent event, Claudine found herself extremely tired and exhausted, so she finally found the softness of her bed. The heavy fur blanket helped lull her to dreams quickly, and unfortunately she didn't manage to get away from the thoughts of the insufferable Tendou Maya.
She dreamt of the party, but instead of hundreds of guests and a hurricane of voices, it was an empty ballroom, where music played softly.
She was back in her red gown and pinned up hair, and found herself face to face with a certain brown haired girl.
Over her vest was now a black tailcoat that reached down to her thighs, and in the place of the belt and scabbard was a red sash. Maya stepped closer, to Claudine's dismay, and swiftly held her, exactly as the day they first danced together.
“You look nervous.” Maya teased, the usual smirk on her face.
Claudine looked away fleetingly, feeling much less confident than real life. It was true, regretfully. She didn't know what these feelings were. They plagued her night and day, and yearned for contact between the two.
“Why must you always seem so confident.” Claudine asked, looking down at their feet. Her hands slowly slid to their positions- one hand gripping Maya’s and the other gripping the waist of the tailcoat.
Maya was silent for a moment, before they started moving to the soft sway of the music.
“You...make me want to feel that way. It brings out the faces and emotions of yours that I truly love.”
The answer shocked Claudine, and she not only felt a burning in her face, but now her whole body. The connection of the skin of their hands felt like static, and she tucked her chin down a bit so that her face would be hidden.
But, in a turn of events, Maya sped up a bit, spun and dipped her. Her arm wrapped around her back and her hand still gripping Claudine's, she looked down at her with a look the princess had never seen before.
“I want you all to myself. If you haven't noticed already, I tend to be a very jealous woman.”
Claudine stared up at eyes burning with passion and could feel herself drown in them. With heat burning between them both and the gentle pull, she found herself closer and closer to lips that hovered just out of reach. Closing her eyes and using her just senses, she felt a ghost of a touch brush her lips…
Before she opened her eyes.
But, unlike to darkness, she spotted something. A glint and reflection of the faint moonlight hovering above her.
With a gasp, Claudine shot out her hand and grabbed the arm holding the knife that hovered above her, stopping it in just the nick of time.
Pushing the arm down and away from her, she jabbed out blindly with a fist, and luckily made contact with a nose.
The assailant let out a yelp before falling backwards onto their back and Claudine spotted and heard movement of another shape shifting toward her with speed from the same side  Diving off the opposite end of the bed, she scrambled off the bed and to her feet, lunging for her sword they lay against her armoire.
“Shit!” The figure that had been knocked to the ground cussed, and stood, pulling a sword from his waist. The other did the same, and with Claudine’s eyes adjusting to the dark she could not see their faces due to the black cloaks that covered their shoulders.
“You have made a grave mistake.”Claudine threatened, holding her blade in front of her.
Without another word the two rushed forward, one with his blade raised, the other ready to strike.
The one with the raised blade reached her first, and without hesitation, she blocked it with a clank, and shifted her body to the side before letting her weapon run along the edge. A screech sounded from the clashing metal's, and she swiped down and across, making contact with a leg.
Yelling, the man stumbled back, losing his balance and fell to the ground a few steps away, unable to get upon his feet.
Soon after the other swung his larger sword from his right side, and using her strength, Claudine angled her blade as a ramp, and side stepping, so that the uncontrolled attack would not hit her.
Losing momentum, the second man stumbled forward into the cabinet with an crash, the wood splintering slightly from his force. Taking a step back, Claudine raised her blade again, ready for another attack, but it never came.
After regaining themselves, the two struggled to their feet and exited back through which they came, her bedroom window.
Claudine thought to go after them before her attention was shifted to her bedroom door bursting open.
Maya, looking ultimately on high alert had her shirt poorly tucked into her loose pants and her hair a true mess, held her blade in front of her ready for assault.
But when her gaze first scanned upon an empty room, they then landed on Claudine. Without a moment wasted, she rushed over and wrapped the princess in a rib breaking embrace dropping the sword to the ground.
“I heard noises, so I rushed over as fast as I could…” she breathed, her arms wrapped tightly around Claudine's shoulder and torso.
The blonde stood in shock, never hearing the tone in her bodyguards voice before. It seemed panicked and worried. Nothing like her usual confident self. Dropping her sword, she begun to left her arms so that she could return the hold, but Maya pulled away at arm's length.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?” Her eyes quickly scanned Claudine's body for any injuries before staring straight at her.
They were painstakingly silent for a few moments, just staring into each other's eyes before Claudine begun to register what was happening. She had just been attacked. They had tried to kill her. And they had been so close to doing so.
Before she knew it, her body shook, and she felt something wet on her cheek. Reaching up, she wiped it away, before looking down at her hand, then up at Maya’s concerned gaze.
Claudine felt her cheeks become more and more wet, and soon the neutral plain expression on her face morphed into a frown. When the sob escaped past her lips, Maya pulled her back into her chest, whispering soothing words into her ear. Saying it was okay, she was safe now. She would protect her. Her words were also apologizes for not being there. For letting her be alone. For getting there too late.
Claudine buried her face into her bodyguards shoulder, and pressing her body as close as she could. Tight arms wrapped around Maya's torso, and hands gripped the soft worn tunic. Sobs became muffled in the cloth, and after a while her body stopped shaking.
After a sharp inhale, Claudine pulled back from Maya’s grip to look into her eyes. While they were back to being calm and collected, the blonde could see the worry still etched into the girls face. Reaching up, Maya took her hands and gently cupped Claudine’s face.
“I'm so glad you are okay.”
A thumb brushed across her cheek, and with those words, Claudine felt her heart squeeze.
It was then she realized what her feelings really were.
Soon after the traumatic event,  the castle was in a panic. Guards stood posted more than ever, and the King and Queen had become incredibly busy with the news and many other duties that had spawned.
The night of the attack Claudine had instead stayed in Maya's room in her bed, while her bodyguard sat all night in a chair next to her. She refused to fall asleep, and when Claudine woke the next morning (she somehow managed to sleep with Maya's presence) she saw the girl sitting straight up and alert, watching everything in the room.
The next few days were truly hectic, and Claudine found herself under 24/7 surveillance and Maya did not leave her side. In fact, instead the the usual watch from a short distance away, she stood directly next to her at all times, and instead of being just a hallway down, she stayed in Claudine’s room with her, once again standing guard.
The was truly tiring the past couple of days, and every night Claudine found herself turning to mush the moment she met the warmth of her bed. Although it somewhat irritated her that she was under constant watch and surveillance, Maya was a more tolerable presence. And even if she did tell Maya to go and get a good night's rest, she would not have answered and continued her watch by the door.
Letting out a heavy breath from beneath the covers, Claudine looked down past the end of her bed and let her gaze settle on Maya who was lit from the light of a fireplace in the corner of the room. She stared for a short while, before biting her lip and braving her next question.
“Maya.”
The guards eyes instantly snapped to Claudine's location, and her gaze softened in acknowledgement.
“Will you...come stay with me?”
The question hung in the air for an awkward amount of time, and Claudine instantly began regretting her question.
It wasn't until Maya stood and walked over silently to the other side of the bed Claudine began to panic. She had not turned, so she couldn't see Maya, but she did hear the unbuckling of her belt and scabbard and the clank of the metal tip of the sheath hitting the cobblestone ground.
The bed then dipped beneath weight, and after movements of settling, it became still. Claudine bit her bottom lip, before turning and facing an already turned over Maya.
There were bags under her eyes and her lips were chapped, but her eyes were wide awake and alert. Claudine suddenly became a bit angry, her usual behavior coming back to her. Maya had not properly slept or eaten ever since the incident, and the princess just now let the frown come to her lips. Maya had to take care of herself. She was her bodyguard and her rival, and it was a necessary for the girl to be in top top shape. In this state, Claudine was sure she could beat her in spar. Which wouldn't be right.  They both needed to be in full health before it was an real challenge. The princess would not accept it otherwise.
Softness in her face, she brought a hand up to Maya's cheek lovingly, before pulling her hand back a bit and flicking the girl in the forehead with a satisfying snap.
Maya's eyes opened wide, and she blinked a couple times in surprise, not knowing what to say. A frown on her face, Claudine spoke.
“You will get a full night's rest and eat tomorrow until you are full and properly healthy. If you do not do so, I will throw you in the dungeons.”
Maya blinked a few more times, before the corner of her mouth curved up and a giggle escaped her mouth.
Claudine was so entrapped by the sound, she almost forgot she was scolding the girl and her irritation was instantly gone.
“Yes princess.”Maya replied, her eyes a bit squinted from her grin. It was infectious, and Claudine couldn't help but let her own grin escape from her lips. The two stared for a moment before Maya shifted and put a hand between them. Sucking in a small breath, Claudine broke her gaze and looked down at it, before moving her own hand to meet it.
When they met, their fingers intertwined with each other, and the warmth from the contact soothed them both.
Looking up, Claudine saw that Maya had closed her eyes and was finally beginning to rest, so she decided to do the same. Just before the crackling of the dying fireplace and dreams overtook her she heard a quiet voice speak.
“Goodnight my Claudine.”
Days passed and the castle went back into its its normal state, with the exception of more guards posted. Things returned to as they were before, and training and Claudine's normal schedule had begun again, including her favorite part of the day.
Training had gone along like usual. A warm up to start, then a polishing of techniques, and last the sparring. Maya had reverted back to her usual self with her teasing quips and natural confidence and Claudine went back to being irritated a frustrated with losing.
But something was different. The line that was there before seemed faint, and the two found themselves often closer than usual. Accidental brushes of the hand, fleeting touches, lingering gazes. It all seemed new, and while their relationship remained mostly the same, there was something deeper now. A connection that made Claudine's heart flutter and her frustration melt away.
Although not at the moment as Claudine began to fall backwards after having her feet sweeped out from under her.
Claudine started to protest, but found herself caught in a grip that kept her hovering from the ground below. Opening her eyes, she met a familiar gaze with a invigorating smirk floating above her.
“It seems I win again.” There was gloat in Maya's voice, and her tone was teasing as she held the blonde In her arms.
Claudine stared for a moment, the familiarness of the situation freezing her thought process and she instantly thought of her dream.
It was so close now, and it was real. All she had to do was move up…
But, instead, she let a determined smile take a place on her lips, refusing to give up just yet.
“Then I will win the next one.”
Maya smirked once again, her smile saying it all. She accepted the challenge. And she always will.
It was later that day when the sun was setting and the courtyard where training took place had cleared out. All that was left were a few spare wooden swords and arrows left in their targets.
The sun left an orange glow across the setting, and from the grass Claudine stood holding a wooden sword, practicing her strikes. She wore her blonde hair up in messy pony tied by a brown ribbon, and her clothes showed the fruit of her heart work, sweat beginning to show.
She had been so invested on making precise blows, she almost hadn't noticed the soft footsteps behind her. Whirling around, she met another wooden blade with hers, the two sticks making a loud clack that echoed through the courtyard. Maya stood behind the blade, and the two held the position before they exchanged a few more blows, filling the air with noise.
After an opening appeared, Claudine jumped back away from Maya, and stood in a ready stance. They held each other's stare for a moments, waiting for the other to make the first move.
Claudine moved first. She held her blade out in front of her, the point facing into the sky.
“Maya Tendou, when I beat you, I propose that you will no longer be my bodyguard.” The princess stated.
A look of confusion passed across the brown haired girls face, and she raised an eyebrow.
Claudine cleared her throat, and looked away from a second, before quickly looking back.
“Instead...you will...you will be…”She could feel her confidence from before wavering, and without even noticing, Maya stepped closer to her, lowering the sword.
“I will be what?” She said slowly.
Claudine became nervous as she came closer and had to look anywhere but Maya.
“Er, uh um...my uh...lo- lov…” She could not finish the sentence, and the princess felt like she was beginning to boil over. She was so flustered, she had not noticed Maya had come so close. Close enough for their bodies to almost touch. Too close.
“Hmmm.” She hummed, leaning forward.”Is this what you mean…”
Claudine looked forward at the last moment to face Maya just as their lips pressed together. She suddenly felt like her insides twisted and her heart started pounding throughout her body. The kiss was warm and soft and she could feel the bodyguards hand travel up the her sides, leaving trails of fire, but it was painstakingly short and sweet. As maya pulled away, Claudine whimpered and leaned forward a bit to try and capture them again, but she was already gone.
“I see. Then I look forward to the day you beat me...If you do.” Maya teased, before stepping back.
Claudine felt like she had a fever, and her nerves were screaming throughout her body, but then her eyes met Maya's. Her rival. Her bodyguard. Her friend. She learned to breathe again. Now that the shock had passed, another feeling entered her body. Pure determination.
“I won’t lose.”
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