#i do not want this degree anymore

[talesofunlikelysapphicpairings]

Do not take Political Science. I am serious. Dead serious. Mostly dead. But also serious.

[lazylittledragon]

do any other artists feel like. yeah you're a 'good artist' because you draw things that look nice, but like. TECHNICALLY? you're really not great

i really hate that i can recognise that yes, my art is good, but is it VARIED? is it dynamic?? is my anatomy good? is it full of texture and colour theory? do i know how to do This? can i do That? no, not really. and that's quite painful actually

[puppyeared]

learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way

[poison-into-positivity]

just learned that David Jenkins’ first show, People of Earth, aired for two seasons and was greenlit for a third, and he scripted the entire third season before the network changed its mind and cancelled it. That is fucking maddening actually.

[watery-melon-baller]

theres people who only have one ship and people who don't have any ships and multishippers well im inventing a new kind of shipper and it's "all of these people are gay and a little in love with each other but the romance is up to interpretation"

[arsenicflame]

teacher student edizzy au but theyre literally already married, its just Izzy as a history teacher or something and Ed as a forever student (they can afford this because of a youth of crime & family discounts) studying something different every few years. he never pursues something all the way to PHD, just has a ton of different degrees. but every time they have some freak psychosexual teacher/student roleplay about it. like, Ed's studying for a chemistry degree, why is he taking a history class? (to fuck the professor)

[faaun]

my research partner and i are huddled in a blanket in paddington waiting for a too-late train i already miss you and you and you

[friendlyorange]

The weirdest thing about going to college for teaching in the united states is the giant CANYON of disconnect between what we're taught and what we actually do in a classroom.

like we're taught how to diversify methods of instruction in order to most equitably reach the diverse populations of our classrooms and inspire them to do their best writing/reading/speaking (im an English teaching major) but then in reality the students in your classroom are insanely below the level they need to be at in order to engage with age-appropriate lessons for them

we're taught how to take common core standards and transform them into meaningful and deep lessons but we're only given 45-90 mins of planning per day (if we're lucky) and the rest needs to be done outside of school or after hours if you can't do it quickly enough, and teachers are always expected to do research outside of the classroom, as well as collaboration, tweaking of lesson plans, etc.

we're told that students crave learning and they crave fun projects and they crave kinesthetic exercises, but then when I try those things in the classroom everyone complains and halfasses their participation, and im lucky if half of them actually pass something in, whether its an assignment, a test, a project, or an assessment.

we're told that we need to have open communication not only between teachers but between teachers and admin and parents, but then im lucky if one of the ten parents I email about their kid failing emails me back, and im luckier if admin takes a behaviorally disturbed student out of my class for insulting me or other students.

like... i guess my point is that teaching education is so idyllic and utopian, and actual classrooms are a goddamn nightmare of behavioral issues, lack of time/resources, exhausting interactions with students who don't want to be there or participate, and insane expectations from students, parents, and admin alike.

Like... no wonder the teaching field is hemorrhaging teachers right now. How can ANYONE work under the insane conditions we're forced to try and teach in. I'm so tired and I'm not even out of school yet. It's actually psychotic.

[valeriefauxnom]

A Subtle Running Theme

So, a day or two ago, I had the sudden realization about a theme in Abyss that I'm not sure I've seen addressed: 'getting what you wanted in the past that you no longer want now' and how that might influence the ending. Major Abyss spoilers up ahead!

Take Guy, for instance. He, of course, wanted to kill Luke fon Fabre.

He doesn't any more. He wants Luke to live and live well.

And yet...

Asch dies nearly instantly after he finally declares he intends to accept the 'Luke' identity:

...and then Luke follows in short order, despite his fervent wish to see what was done to his family returned to the Duke's.

Jade's another case.

His original intent when he first started working to create replicas was to use them as replacements for the originals, just as substitute bodies to revive the dead, memories and all. He worked and worked hard to find a way to make this dream come to life, modifying the means by which replicas are made in an effort to increase their stability (by means of switching to 7th fonons as their origin fonon).

Since then, he's moved on to believe that such a thing is just flat out impossible. That the dead do not come back, and that everything he did was a fool's errand.

But then, his 'impossible dream' of the Big Bang suddenly is possible. He gets to see it with Star, the original successfully taking over his replica's body, his mind intact...and now is faced with the prospect of it happening to Luke.

Which, again, is a thing he no longer wants.

Jade, shortly after: ...But this time, I do hope that the answer I’ve produced is incorrect.”

I also quote, from a talk between him and Dist, it's clear that Jade is trying very hard to avoid acknowledging the reality for what it is, that Asch will almost be guaranteed take over Luke's faculties and body in the near future, whilst not trying to appear weak to Dist:

Dist: ...Regardless of what caused his death, we can assume the Big Bang had begun. Jade: ...It may not have begun. Dist: What is that supposed to mean?! You're the one who finalized the theories on perfect isofons! Do you not believe your own research?! The Jade that I knew – Jade the Golden Child – isn't someone who would say something like that. ... Dist: Or is that replica that important to you? More than your best friend, Saphir?! Jade: The dust on the floor has value compared to you. Dist: Listen, Jade. The Contamination Effect cannot be prevented. Even with your talent.

Despite this attempt, Dist recognizes that Jade is not exactly happy with this fact, and tries to console Jade, while displaying his own perspective of 'memories=person' that Jade has moved on from. You know it's bad when Dist is attempting to console Jade in his own warped little way.

What had been his greatest dream is now a worst nightmare: Luke, as confirmed on Eldrant, would have lost his life and mind regardless if he survived the freeing of Lorelei, all to be a backup to the currently-dead Asch.

Hell, I can extend this to Natalia, too. She, in essence, wished for Luke to stop being himself the past seven years. To hurry up and re-become that prince charming she saw in Asch before his 'amnesia'. And soon he will, just as she has started to learn to appreciate Luke for his own merit instead of just being the inferior reflection of Asch.

Luke himself is not immune, either.

Starting at act two, Luke is increasingly depressed. He goes from passively wishing that maybe he ought have died to actively thinking dying would be the best for the world.

Enter Tower of Rem, where he finally decides that he actually wants to live. Lo and behold, it's exactly then the universe then decides to ensure a death in the near future for him via fonon separation. Not just that, but his journey's course leads to a duty that will kill him. Doomed twice over to certain death.

And that's not all. Another struggle he has is determining his own self identity. He finally resolves to want to be his own person, be able to have his own mind and body separate from just being 'Asch's replica' or 'Asch' at all in any capacity. This is a big thing that starts to anger Asch in the ending, as Asch has his own complicated feelings on Luke's independence from him and what it means for his own impending death (that I could and might rant about in another post).

Again, though, even that is possibly contested in the ending.

In short, Jade, Luke, and Guy all got what they wanted at the end of Abyss... just not what they wanted in the present.

---

So, uh, yeah!

I see a lot of arguments that it just has to be Luke in the end, that he's the protagonist and thus is more untouchable/more likely to be revived than less central characters like Asch, and that it would be against Abyss' themes of self-determination to have that mysterious figure be anything other than Luke in body and (complete) soul.

However, with Abyss also consistent in its 'be careful what you wish for' narratives that come back to bite and bite hard the good chunk of the cast, I would argue it's entirely possible to have the ending be but another case of this corruption of past wishes.

[romanceyourdemons]

i’m honestly sick of people asking me “do you think ai’s gonna take all our jobs someday?” man i don’t fucking know, and it’s not like there’s anything i can do about it anyway. what are you asking me for i’m not the one making those decisions i am literally just making bagels

[lynxfrost13]

Do you guys think Holt and Storch Sieben ever hatefucked

[name-doggo]

One thing I really wish the FF Community would Stop doing is Removing All Nuance from the Parents in Those Stories in order to Make Them Abusive Supervillains who Never Loved their Kid.

Like... In the Four Years I've been here, and for how Small the Community really is, you'd be surprised how many Times I've seen it-

[acheemient]

Is it really even fanfiction if you don't use the word "ministrations"?

[cappurrccino]

i was gonna say "i shouldn't have to go to work when my brain feels like a depression slushie" and then i was like "wait but then i'd basically never ever go to work" and i'm actually doubling down on the first part now bc my god how am i supposed to heal my brain from burning out 5 years ago if i can never get an actual break

[verdiesque]

made the mistake of thinking a bit too long about political situation at home and now i'm crying again lol

[vivwritesfics]

I wasn't made for academics