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#i don't feel like i'm living here
handlewithcharacter · 8 months
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I'm in my "say fuck it, quit everything, pack a single bag, and go move to a small seaside town in New England" feels again
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uncanny-tranny · 7 months
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It's honestly frustrating that I've seen non-Russian queer people almost bragging about how they would be illegal in Russia, labeled an extremist or terrorist. Russian queers are in danger, their government has made it clear where it stands, and it's made this effort for the better part of a decade (even longer, perhaps). This will kill people, don't mistake this for a quirky little proclamation from a government, akin to somebody saying the sky is pink. Russian queer people were already expressing their fear, and the least we can do now is express our love for them, and advocate with them.
Russian queer people, I love you. I love you all so much. I am so sorry, I cannot begin to express the grief that I feel, and I hope that you are safe. Words cannot encapsulate how I feel as a non-Russian, and I cannot hope to comprehend how it feels to actually be in this situation.
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starcurtain · 23 days
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Hear me out. I know it's unlikely that Ratio would ever have been foolish enough to directly get taken in by a scam, but considering that we know:
One of the groups specifically tricked by Kakavasha before he joined the IPC was the Intelligentsia Guild
What he tricked them about was Tayzzyronth's Swarm remnants, the exact same thing we see Ratio investigating in his very first appearance in the game, and
The researchers were described as "extremely cautious"
I am surprised that "Ratio was at least somehow connected to the Intelligentsia Guild team fooled by Kakavasha before he was ever even a Stoneheart" isn't more popular with the Ratio and Aventurine fandom.
Like imagine being Dr. Ratio. You tell your colleagues, "This seems like a scam. Are you sure you should trust this 'local guide' you've made contact with? Tell me about him. A picture? Does this even look like an Egyhazan native to you? I won't save you fools from making idiotic decisions." (You end up having to clean up the aftermath of their idiotic decisions anyway. There is sand in places on your body you didn't even know existed before this. How mortifying for the Guild. For you, by association.)
Then, next thing you know, you get a mission briefing slid across your desk from your IPC connections. They want you to work with their new Stoneheart. You open the packet to see... that little bastard with the enthralling eyes who had your moronic colleagues scrambling in the dirt on a backwater planet for months. Apparently he's made a career out of fooling you your supposedly competent guildmates.
You run off to confront him. You never met him personally back then, but you deserve compensation for the idiocy you were subjected to nonetheless. He deserves to know how much of a pain in the ass he's been in your life already without ever having met your eyes--
He proceeds to shove a gun into your hands and tries to make you an accomplice to a suicide. Apparently, this is normal behavior for the man now called Aventurine. Somehow, it's supposed to prove to you that he is a sane and reliable individual.
Absolutely nothing in your life has been normal since Egyhazo.
You would like to have mundane problems, sometimes.
How do you keep ending up in this beautiful manic clever conman's orbit, and why, like binary stars, can you not escape the gravitational pull?
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nonasbirthday · 4 months
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of course you can read necros and cavs as a parallel to the gender binary bc A) you can do whatever you want forever and B) yeah there's plenty of textual evidence comparing the necro-cav bond to a marriage. however one thing i think many of these discussions keep missing is the fact that most people in the nine houses are not necros or cavs and do in fact exist outside of this binary. which would make it. not really much of a binary
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aquanutart · 6 months
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lunarharp · 4 months
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What led to this (orufrey comic, cw an uncomfortable/creepy scene)
#witch hat tag#orufrey#er.... i'm too tired to have anything to say..i worked several days on this.#wait.. didn't i say just recently here that i probably wouldn't ever depict 'what if alaira is qifrey's sort-of ex'. What's going on#i don't even remember deciding to draw this..it's all a blur..i'm not sure why i WOULD decide to draw delicate scenes in my head#that i wouldn't really want to share with anyone/discuss so why did i draw it...#some part of me really really wants to draw things that are more and more true to myself...#maybe because of my alienation with most romance/shipping/dynamics the rest of the world depicts.#orufrey really is perfectly suited to me - what i read in the text and what is in my head. well anyway#i am TIRED of drawing poses and angles and..maybe now i will actually take a break from drawing bc of the tediousness of Angles#btw it really is a 'stretch of time' . . . assuming witches graduate age 18-20#well orufrey are canonically 30-ish. they've only had agott around for presumably about TWO years (?) bc she took the test age 10#and it feels like oru moving in/unknown atelier acquisition/building (?) .. i guess that could be a year or so before agott at most#(she was the first disciple) so... ????????? What about the other 7 or so years ?!?!?!!?!?! Unemployed Brimhat Hatred era#that time is very nebulous. after qifrey went to the tower i feel like it's been implied he and oru drifted apart a little.#certainly they didn't live together at first... no way. that doesn't feel like how it is based on things oru has said about becoming Eye#idk. I'm tired now. i don't usually think of alaira as necessarily qifrey's ex and this being how things went in that 'sliver of time'.#i usually prefer the idea that they have their first kiss with each other in their 30s cause That's Just The Orufrey Lifestyle#just felt like making a more relatable alternative view of my own Cai Orufrey Canon one time. btw im a big monoshipper and it hurt a bit#let's leave it there. this is surely the most i've worked on a 'single' art - though now i realise just how much longer the fic took :')
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eddiezpaghetti · 5 months
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Okay, so my experience with Stranger Things is a weird one.
I didn't care when it first came out, started to watch it out of "might as well" in 2020, wasn't interested in it enough to make it past S2, forgot about it outside of going "oh, hey, cool, there's a lesbian in it now, I guess," in S3, got really annoyed when "Running Up That Hill" got popular from it because it was a song I listened to on fucking loop after one of my best friends died in high school and I fully expected its appearance in the show to ignore the whole survivor's guilt theme of the song (and was very happy to learn later that it did the exact opposite of ignoring the lyrics), saw people drawing Eddie, suddenly got a lot more interested, watched just the fourth season like a fucking psychopath because I was seriously only there for Eddie, then got interested enough to start the show over properly, having mostly forgotten what I did watch of the show before.
And let me tell you something from the perspective of someone who started with the complete fourth season, who wasn't there from the start, who wasn't tainted by ship goggles or this internal battle of hope and despair, who wasn't theorizing about what the painting could be or expecting Mike and Will to kiss when Volume 2 happened or rooting for Mike and Eleven's relationship to go down in flames or whatever the fuck. Just someone who went blind into Season 4.
It's really fucking obvious that Will and Mike are gonna be endgame.
Like holy fuck. It's so fucking blatant I don't even know why people are nervous.
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No sane fucking person would shoot this scene this way if they wanted the audience to care about El and Mike as a couple. Despite being all blurry in the background, Will's reaction to what's happening here is smackdab in the fucking middle, clearly showing that the important part is what's going through his head here. What he's feeling. It's like the opposite of that scene from Kingdom Hearts II where Sora and Riku reunite and Kairi just fucking vanishes into the aether while it's happening because, despite the fact that she was standing between them when the scene began, she doesn't matter to the scene, so she's just kind of gone when the camera angle changes. Will could have been behind one of their heads, or so far in the distance he blends in with the background, but he's not. He's so obvious that despite being massively blurred out, he's still the first goddamn thing you look at. What, you think that's an accident? You think he's in the middle of this dramatic fucking scene because of a mistake? He basically has a big flashing neon arrow pointing at him with "THIS IS THE POINT" being screamed through a megaphone.
And then this?
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They're paired up like they're taking fucking prom pictures. Each one of these pairs is so fucking close to one another and so fucking far from everyone else. It's not, "Oh, they're standing vaguely near each other in a group shot," it's fucking Noah's Ark out here. Again, there's no way to take this as an accident. It's not just a framing issue. If they wanted to make the shot look balanced while still not hiding anyone else behind El, they would have scattered people around much more naturally. Even if they wanted to keep Nancy with Jonathan and Hopper with Joyce, there's so much room on that hill for three people to stand on El's left and three on her right. But they didn't do that. They put Mike and Will together on purpose in the most obvious way possible.
Like I get that coming up with crackpot theories is fun in and of itself and I'm not blaming anyone for having fun. I totally get the appeal of arguing a point and reaching for every stupid little thing to pull into it because it's like a game, okay? I've done that. But if you're trying to actually convince someone (whether it's someone who wants to believe or someone who's pissed at the very idea that Mike and Will could be in love), stay away from blue and yellow lights, stay away from costume design, stay away from the existence of closets in backgrounds. And don't worry about whether Mike's gay or bi when he's in love with Will either way. I'll give you a little tip about persuasion: You're only as strong as your weakest argument. Even if you've got strong stuff in there, too, the person you're trying to convince is going to dismiss anything you say as complete insanity the second you start going on an entire tangent about the shape of a character's fucking pocket.
Sometimes, clothes are just clothes. Sometimes, there's a closet in the background because it helps establish that a character is in a bedroom. Sometimes, blue and yellow are just a couple of colors that look nice together. And sure, it might be set designers and costume designers and cinematographers smirking and winking at the audience from behind the camera. But if the show was just those things, instead of those things in the context of everything else, they wouldn't be saying anything of note.
But this?
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This tells a story all on its own. Someone with no context can look at this and automatically assume that each paired person is standing with someone they care about deeply, seeking comfort as they watch some sort of disaster unfold. And yeah, romantic couples usually come in twos, and we live in an amatonormative society, so that's going to be the first association anyone makes seeing a bunch of people paired off.
It's the same reason you look at this
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And go, "Oh..."
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"Those two are probably a couple."
And I genuinely don't understand how people could have watched S4 Vol. 2 and gotten scared. Because as someone who went in with no investment whatsoever, I just looked at these two--
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--and went, "Oh, those two are a couple. Good for them." And I moved on. Shut up about the trees for five seconds and just see the forest for what it is.
Oh, and if you're still nervous? Little thing from a storyteller here: You don't leave a hanging thread like "Will confessed his romantic feelings for Mike by projecting them onto El, but Mike either didn't understand or at least didn't say he understood," without coming back to that later. That's Chekov's gun hanging on the wall, babes. It's gonna fire at some point. If Mike was going to reject Will's feelings, if they weren't relevant, they would have had that discussion in Argyle's van. There'd be no reason to leave you in suspense.
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hurglewurm · 15 days
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me: we are Not going to worsen our life while in a minor depressive episode
the brain: :/
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vegaseatsass · 22 days
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Since I'm still thinking about Ming today... Let us compare Three Mings.
1. Ming when he's Scared*
*caught off guard by domesticity/affection and how much he likes and wants it
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2. Ming when he's Trying*
*to fix the shit he does when he's scared, but still seem cool and controlled (of highest priority always)
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3. Ming when he's Scared*
*deeply fucking terrified, scrambling, on the precipice of a complete break from sense and reason which he shan't recover from for years
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And the thing is, which of these Mings do you think stays with Joe in his bones, in his gut. Which of these Mings are the Mings Joe remembers and thinks of as true?
Ming my babygirl, you have so so soooo much more Trying to try.
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kashilascorner · 1 month
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for @queer-ragnelle May Day Parade. May 17-21: Grumpy Month of Kay {Seneschal Celebration}
I have been here since before you became yourself: a collection of Kays (and Arthurs)
Chulhwch and Olwen / Camelot (2011) ep. 1 / Vulgate Cycle: The Story of Merlin / La Morte D'Arthur (Sir Thomas Malory) / The Once and Future King, book 1 The Sword in the Stone (TH White) / Sir Kay's coat of arms / Matthew 16:19 / Under cover of darkness (The Strokes) / Arthur of the Britons (1972) ep. 3 / Vulgate Cycle / Camelot (2011) / Icarus (The Crane Wives) / Idylls of the queen (Phyllis Ann Karr) / Hey Brother (Aviicii) / The High History of the Holy Graal (aka Perlesvaus), trans. Sebastian Evans / Camelot (2011) / Alliterative Morte Arthure, trans. Richard Scott-Robinson / Icarus (The Crane Wives)
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bubblewrapsnek · 3 days
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Phantomarine Live reread: Prologue
I'm anticipating the reread before the chapter finishes cause I want to read it now again, altho I wanted to wait the chapter to be over to have a cleaner finish line for mental order and to avoid posing questions to things that would be maybe have more ground to speculate on or outright be answered in a few days This is my first time rereading Phantomarine, so if anyone is actually goint to read these posts expect me to come to realizations about stuff that everyone knew ages ago probably, also it's my first time liveblogging something since a friend suggested it could be appreciated, I am not convinced there would be interested but it can't hurt I guess. That said I hate the idea of clogging with posts and like keeping stuff a bit more tidy, so I'll post one post per chapter with my thoughts, silly ramblings and whatever comes to my mind that I feel like sharing while trying to put my thoughts in order
So uhh if you exist and are reading, have fun and feel free to interact!
First thing I'll not here with a few examples and try to not say everytime, but I can't help seeing how the royal family brands EVERYTHING with the Manta, I swear you could fill a where's waldo book by searching the mantas in Phantomarine's pages at this A manta hat, manta drawer, manta desk, and a manta polo in just the first pages, I swear they have a disney park-esque gift shop outside the palace
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A manta hat, manta drawer, manta desk, and a manta polo in just the first pages, I swear they have a disney park-esque gift shop outside the palace
Bonus neat things, the candle has the same pattern as Cheline's dress and there is what I guess is a samoyede on Irving's shirt
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Next thing is something I hadn't noticed before but I've seen already people point out in the comments now, Irving having very clearly pink eyes, at first I thought it might have been lighting but in the pages where he is alive they are very clearly pink, and even when in shock the characters get drawn with pinprick irises, while the others get black dots he has pink and is even more blatant in the shot with the Fata morgana stabbing them where he is eye to eye with a Fata with the same eyes
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Bonus: alive Lani is very cute
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I pointed the next thing in another post but I love how Cheline wanted to be sure to scapegoat the Fata Morgana so much she painted the arrows and bow too with Cheth's name bands(confirmed to be painted on by the transcript too altho it was the only possible reason they had those bad with what we know now), also I love that the cyan outline was faintly on the Fata Morgana's eye from the beginning
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I am also getting suspicious about the ghosts being blue and the veins(referred as such in the transcript) that spread from the bite being purple, tho I don't have a concrete or sound thought about this
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Also, something I love a lot in comics is paneling so some of this won't be thoughts but just panels that are really pretty or fun or creative here I love how the action flows very well, having many details making what happens readable such as the "magic" squares making phae's body on the bottom edge of the silouhette in the middle also appear on the heart, showing the wound being "repaired"
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Love the veins snaking behind her
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Something I had completely glossed over was Phae's middle name being Augusta, and I do find it possible to have a reading on it, as Augustus was the name and title that Octavian took as the first emperor of rome, the member of a what can be considered a royal lineage establishing the name for himself and becoming a key turning point in the history of an empire, just as I can see Phae become the turning point for the history of her reign, a change of the guard and of the status quo of the kingdom she watches over
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End in the end, to finish the prologue of this reread, a funny typo Cheth appears, tipping his fedora: "M'Phaedra"
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annotated-catastrophe · 4 months
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I don't know why this is so funny to me.
That I almost died this morning, actually.
And... this place lives on.
It's funny how much the world really doesn't revolve around me.
I'm glad it doesn't!
I don't mind at all.
I am just in a strange mood.
It was just a near car crash, I'm ok.
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spoondoodles · 5 days
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I blacked out and more Logince HS AU appeared on my canvas idk what happened (also ty @oatmeal-stans-the-trash-rat for some inspiration sorry it took so long to make a post about Them <3)
#spoondoodles#sanders sides#sanders sides fanart#ts sides#tss#logan sanders#roman sanders#patton sanders#remus sanders#janus sanders#logince#I am here!!! for the platonic relationships!!!!! in this AU!!!!!!!#i have a strong character arc in my head about platonic logicality growing up together as childhood friends you have no idea asdfghj#i think they were very dependent on each other for many years so much so they'd copy each other but they're much more independent in HS#only remnant of that is that they have the same glasses + emotionally vent to each other a lot - their friends circle has grown enough#they don't live in each others' pockets anymore. roman + janus met in theatre + are gossip besties like they just talk shit together#(not completely sold on janus' design yet ngl i'm not happy with how i drew the vitilego but i'm working on it)#remus + logan are partners in chemistry in a classic teacher act of putting the 'disruptive' kid next to the 'good student' kid in hopes#that logan would stop remus acting out. predictably what happened instead is that they're friends now + remus is still as disruptive#but in a way that entertains logan so they get their work done early. now the teacher can't separate them. lol lmao.#remus knows ALL. but has been sworn to secrecy so can't say shit. janus knows roman's feelings but only suspects logan's.#patton didn't even have to be told by logan he just KNEW + is choosing not to speculate on roman's feelings b/c he's too polite.#virgil isn't here but that's b/c he also KNOWS without being told + is in an even more precarious position than remus. if they were#on better speaking terms he'd commiserate with remus. alas they are suffering separately.#anyway enough rambling from me. many thoughts head full.
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astraltrickster · 8 months
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Given that my post about why you are not obligated to blog about Current Events (whatever they are at any given time) is going around again, I'd like to say the same thing from a slightly different angle and state what you ARE obligated to do.
You are still not obligated to blog about ANY specific subject, no matter how serious, no matter how urgent, no matter how grave. You never will be. The impact of social media on real world atrocities has the potential to be great, but it is cumulative. No one is going to die in a ditch somewhere, barely uttering the tragic final words, "if only...if only...tumblr users wormhentaiafficionado and mothmanbutthole...posted about how sad they are...then maybe things would be different..." - nor are policymakers going to change their minds because some tweet has 749,845 cumulative likes and retweets instead of 750,000. Make no mistake, if you have the energy to be sharing these kinds of things, it can be good to do! We live in a society, it's always good to help where you can, even if all you can do is show public support for people who are hurting - but if you can't do that, for any reason, you're not obligated to. Period. End of.
What are you obligated to do?
1. Give people the benefit of the doubt. Social media accounts are not most people's entire lives. Just because someone isn't blogging about whatever tragedy is occurring does not mean they don't care. Sometimes it does mean that, sure, and that sucks - but not only are you not going to change that by yelling at them, sometimes it means they care too much. Sometimes it means they're closer to it than you assumed and need a moment to think about something else, anything else. Sometimes it means it's not safe for them to be blogging about it, be it due to abusive family potentially finding out, being at risk of getting fired and quite possibly dying of poverty sooner rather than later, or even taking very illegal direct action that they do not want to be linked to on record in even the vaguest possible way. Sometimes it means dealing with it is their day job and they're on the internet after a long and exhausting day of trying to make things better. You don't know. You'll never know unless they decide to tell you. No one owes you that explanation. You are obligated to make peace with that fact.
2. Slow the fuck down.
Listen. When bad things happen, from natural disasters, to manmade horrors beyond our comprehension, it's only normal to get scared and desperate to do something, anything about it. That heightened emotional state is very vulnerable, and because of that, there will always be people out there looking to take advantage of the chaos for ulterior motives - and no matter how good your intentions, and in fact no matter how right you are in your values and at the core of your strategy, you will never be immune to garbage-in-garbage-out. Misinformation can be deadly, even in the hands of someone who means well. You need to pause long enough to sort out the garbage. You need to learn to fight the impulse to trust every single post that tells you that your share/comment/etc. is URGENT and WILL mean the difference between life and death for someone, somewhere. Do your fact checks. Scan for dogwhistles before you end up passing around a post that implies [insert group that is marginalized in most of the English-speaking world but has hegemonic power in some other part of the world and is committing some atrocity there] is coming after you next if you stay silent. Vet charity and advice links before you accidentally send scared, desperate, and vulnerable people to a scammer - or worse, hand them over to a honeypot operation or give them a recipe for poisonous "medicine".
Or, to put it another way, you are obligated to make an attempt to stay informed enough to avoid making things materially worse. You are not obligated to doomblog. In fact, doomblogging can be antithetical to your obligation to not make things worse. Choosing neutrality in times of great tragedy and injustice is bad, yes, but you should immediately be wary of anyone who says that simply not blogging about a subject - let alone not sharing a specific post - is inherently "choosing neutrality".
So remember: breathe. Be careful out there. Mourn for the people that whatever atrocity has this or my other post circulating has taken from us or will take from us, and do your best to be kind to the people who are still alive - and remember that kindness includes using social media responsibly.
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ssaalexblake · 1 year
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it’s also baffling to me that tumblr, home of the ‘why are white men Still being cast as the doctor’ for So many years now (For you know, like over a decade.) is somehow not appalled that they hired a white dude to be the next Doctor because look okay it’s okay if it’s This white man. 
I mean, I do not consent to acknowledge that they’ve shoved him in there under any circumstance, but my Only need for the casting of the next person was that it was Not a white man, otherwise i didn’t care who it was, so when they “announced” Gatwa I was satisfied (i am hesitant to say they announced it bc it was more like a tiny footnote than an announcement, oh the disrespect) and it took a whole seven days (it was literally seven days. Yes i counted. it was easy since it was only seven days) it was ‘actually sorry no it’s this white dude we’ve already had before did we forget to mention that???’ and it’s steadily gotten worse and worse. 
That This site of all places is not up in arms about both the situation and how it specifically played out is depressing, but also massively and darkly hilarious.  
Especially since i Also remember nobody on this site thought casting Whittaker was good enough but literally going backward to a previous white man is?? This is not even a metaphor about diversity getting worse, they literally looked backwards. 
But, yeah,  tenn/ant with the ‘what the future looks like’ headline is uh... Good???? Not super worrying and ominous? 
I feel like i’ve been dumped in some weird parallel universe by reactions to all of this on here like??? the whole way this was done was appalling, the situation is appalling, but i guess the bbc/disney should get a rousing round of applause for accurately judging that nobody would care about their poor actions if the specific white guy they cast was popular enough that next to nobody would care. 
( and to the ‘it’s an anniversary ep’ thing, they legit could have just set a couple of eps in the past. i don’t mean they travel to the past. i mean just say ‘hey this ep is set during s4!’ and nobody would care. this show does weirder stuff than this every second episode. and it would still be bad, but how they did it is so much Worse.)
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lunarharp · 6 months
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figured i'd do this again..bit early i guess..
#to cheer me up.. i feel bad atm.. these things don't even make me feel very good tho bc i'm such a narrative/sketch-based artist..#but Proper Beautiful Finished Pieces are what grab attention and look good at the end of the year all neatly lined up lol.....#so looking at a “yearly review” where i can only choose 'the best image of the month' (??) is like...What have i even been doing...#i did a month by month look back on twt for myself instead..but even that doesn't express the quantity of comic-based stuff..#that i do put a lot of time/heart into..but alas i feel bad bringing even them back..RTing/reblogging my own art simply feels bad lol..#AND WHY IS IT ALL B&W...trying to accept that i LIKE doing that and sketching and scribbling..not like i'm trying to like..Get Artist Job..#this year was so profoundly lonely at times bc i spent all my time drawing instead of socialising and trying to find friends....#please please please have achieved more of your dreams in the future so you can look back at 2023 and think..#It was good that happened so that it got me further to the future. Or whatever i guess.....................#regardless i did have a great amount of fun drawing and improving this year and dwelling deeply & heavily on witch hat atelier.#art-wise and emotionally....march july & september were the best months i think..AUGUST WAS SO WEIRD SUMMER IS SO EVIL ALWAYS.#thank you very much if you are reading this for enjoying & leaving nice tags & such like <3 i've realised how fulfilling that is to receive#really keeps me posting stuff here instead of keeping it all to myself in my head#i wish everyone in this world could have a safe and happy end of year. i wish living in this world were easier
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