#i dont know how to react to a lot of affection i receive

[bunnysdollette]

˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁ How to: Love and bless your haters (even when it’s hard) ⟢ ☕️🪞

➛⋆˚࿔ Hi guys! I found new inspiration on a post I think is very important. I hope y’all find some clarity and insight on this topic today.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ WHY I DONT HAVE “OPPS” AND WHY YOU SHOULDN’T EITHER 🎀 ⊹₊⟡⋆

think of that one person that you just have so much hate for. Everytime you glance at them your blood boils and you even act out fake confrontations of what you want to say to their face. Maybe you want to fight them, spread rumors about them or do whatever you can to make them suffer. You talk bad about them to your friends and invest so much time and energy into them.

now imagine if you just…stopped. imagine if you just stopped caring. Of course that person would still try to provoke you and maybe you would still feel the urge to react every once and a while but, do you think a weight would be lifted off your shoulders ? do you think you could find more healthy options for what to do with your time other than hate this person? if you consider being this person’s opp as a hobby itself, then I think it’s time to release that baggage.

arguing constantly with a person, loosing sleep and brain power over another person is not healthy at all. it doesn’t benefit you. I have had many haters throughout my life like many people, but I recently had a conversation with my mother about one of them. she told me that throughout our lives we’re going to encounter all kinds of women which will try to bring us down in all kinds of ways. but the most important thing to do is to stay true to ourselves and still win anyway. their hate will never take away from our success. so, sit down and think to yourself. why do I continue to beef with this person, when it’s so meaningless and a waste of the time? at the end of the day, the last laugh we will have is who ended up being successful anyways.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ FORGIVENESS IS THE BEST THING ☕️ ⊹₊⟡⋆

it’s important to forgive people who wronged us. it’s the mature thing to do . everyone has their own set journey and we are all so different, so we have to stay humble. I know you think you may be better than a person for a number of reasons,but at the end of the day we are all human. we are all made of the same stuff and we are all God’s children. Don’t ever think you are better than a person because we are all somebody, even if for some people that is a shitty somebody, just to keep it a buck. 🤷🏽‍♀️

today I was receiving an award at my school. i had to get up on stage in front of my whole class. many people clapped, but I try not to pay attention to who does and who doesn’t since I know not everyone is my supporter. one of my friends later told me the girl sitting next to him who talks bad about me a lot stopped clapping when it was my turn and said “oh, it’s her.” it kind of made me upset, if I’m being honest. but I came to terms with the fact that this is my reality. not everybody is going to like you, and that’s okay. you can’t continue to build up layers of fear of not being accepted, because then you’re not even living.

Stop living by other’s rules and expectations. who knows, maybe this girl wasn’t clapping for me because she saw something in me that triggered her or she had her own traumas . who am I to judge her? who am I to gossip about her to my friends, call her out of her name and give her dirty looks? she’s still a person so she still deserves some level of dignity. so think about that one person today who you hate so much, and try to find it in your heart to forgive them. If you aren’t ready yet, that’s okay.

₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ CLAPPING FOR MYSELF 🎓 ⊹₊⟡⋆

when you have so many haters it’s important to clap for yourself. you don’t have to be an extreme self love guru to build some thicker skin so your haters stop affecting you as much, if you do so much as put in an effort to treat yourself more kindly and invest time into yourself you’ll notice a big difference. I struggle badly with self love from day to day, and I’m still healing. I’m on my own journey. But on this journey I’ve learned that you have to take things a step at at time and build a framework.

I think the reason I’ve learned to become less reactive and more peaceful and focused when it comes to haters or people I just dislike is… I see myself as the prize and the end goal is always about myself in this life. YOU are all you have in this life so please start acting like it. At the end of your life, whenever that time may come, you came into this world alone, you will die alone, you will make the journey out of this earth all alone. who do you need to clap for you when you are clapping for yourself?

being brave is being able to say “many people don’t like me, and that’s okay. I put in an effort to like myself.” And besides from wanting masses of people to want to clap for you every day and relying on that validation, when you walk on stage the only applause you will need is from yourself. You are your own audience and competitor. And that self love and self respect will fill your ears louder than a herd of other people who applaud you just for social clout.

[the-s1lly-corner]

not sure if you have done something like this before but can you do one where the reader is the type to call everyone pet names? Kind of like Caine does, like "my dear", "darling", stuff like that

TADC cast x reader who calls them pet names!

ooouuugh characters who call people names of endearment habitually my beloved <33 gotta be one of my favorite genres of character; side eyes itward and dick knubbler and caine unrelated to everything im so mad it took me so long to listen to psycho teddy ive literally had it on loop all day and yesterday while i write RAAAAAAAH romantic leaning by the way! though some can be platonic if you squint, i think!!

CAINE:

honestly i think caine only calls people endearing names platonically and on occasion, but i think you calling him the same style of names it makes his habit more prevalent. i think the first time you call him something like dear, hon, or darling, he kind of does a double take. i mean, hes always the one saying names, but hes never really... been the one on the receiving end... now im not sure if you wanted this to be platonic or romantic, but i think regardless of which this one is; caine loves it and makes it known. you guys experiment to see which names are his favorite eheeh

POMNI:

i think it would take her some time to get used. i think the main reason she didnt really react to caine calling her those names was due to the shock, just to add some explanation for this post in particular on why she didnt seem to mind... i think if there were any names that made her uncomfortable, she would let you know! does eventually embrace it and probably asks if somethings wrong if you call her by her actual name

RAGATHA:

honestly i can easily see ragatha using terms of endearment for those shes close to (like in a general sense, not just familial or romantically) and i can also see her being a huge fan of being called them! i dont think shes been bold enough to ask to be called them, though, so when you just call her dear and love shes over the moon! probably makes a matching name for you! you become to darling to her dear, the bear to her honey, the sweetheart to her sweetpea, and so on and so forth. i just think... that would be really sweet... you know?

JAX:

calls you a really dumb name in response; like shnookums or something within that ballpark. honestly i think it depends on how you say it, when you say it, and how close you guys are when you call him any endearing name. personally i dont think jax likes public affections, since he kind of views it as vulnerability.... at least when hes on the receiving end. bro is weird like that, you know? only lets you call them any of those names behind closed doors.... thinks... surprises you one day by calling you a normal nickname... since usually its the above example or something completely out of no where like. "Mesopotamia" or "20 ton semi truck carrying 720 thunder fucking pounds of freight" or something just as hyper specific

KINGER:

oh i think he would love it a lot! probably calls you a name back in response, perhaps even one that matches; similar to what ragatha does! maybe its because hes old and he gives off nice dad/grandpa vibes, i can see him calling people that he cares about names of endearment (hes only 48)

thinks... though i do think he pauses the first time trying to process what you just called him.. takes him a few seconds before realizing. kind of like the "oh IM pretty boy!" audio but replace pretty boy with any name

ZOOBLE:

i think zooble is the only one who doesnt like endearing names; like i think in a romantic sense they would like it but only really like babe/baby, and not much else... very picky with what they do like, at least for this instance. definitely going to take some experimenting to see what sticks and what doesnt. funny little scenario but imagine sitting with them trying to find something they like and you call them something absolutely abhorrent, perhaps something akin to the "pookie bear with whipped cream and sprinkles on top" meme but WAAAAAY over the top and zooble just. "absolutely not."

not too mean to harsh with rejecting any names, though. but they are blunt about what they do and dont like

GANGLE:

honestly if this isnt romantic and this is platonic, she sees it the same way as when an older lady calls you a sweet name,... you know? does the ^w^ she does in her character intro short thing, me thinks, whenever you call her any name. very shy and sheepish about calling you any names in return, give her some time shes trying to hype herself up so she can return the same energy! only really likes it when you call her those endearing names, i fear that SOMEONE is going to tease her for it... poor girl.... explodes jax with my neurodivergant brain

[yoursweetwife]

hii haha i dont see a lot of topaz x reader so im gona req one hehe so you know the trope where like (character) introduces their pet to their s/o and the pet likes the s/o more than (character)? i wanna see how topaz would react if numby would rather chill with reader more than topaz, if u dont wanna write this then its okay have a nice rest of your day! :D

warnings: female reader (but no pronouns are used), jealous Topaz, Topaz needs a hug

p.s sorry if this is not what you wanted, but as soon as I saw your request, I immediately thought of jealous Topaz

Right now, Topaz was dismayed by the sight in front of her.

She witnessed how Numby lay on your thighs and rubbed against them as if it was the best pillow of his life (in fact, it was true).

Your fingers ran over the piggy's smooth skin, stroking him in every accessible place and cooing sweetly at his every joyful squeal. But once upon a time it was Topaz herself.

She's actually very happy that you two have become friends. Even at the first meeting, Numby began to feel a strange attachment to you. He tried to climb into your arms when they met him, squeaked happily and jumped, which was quite surprising, because it took him time even to let himself be petted. And you never missed a chance to play with Numby.

Despite your work, you remained a good person, and that's what attracted Topaz to you.

And she is glad to have such a wonderful lover, but now she constantly has the feeling that she no longer lives in this house.

But Topaz is partly to blame for not intervening. And she can’t even figure out who she envies more.

"Who's the good piggy here? It's Numby!"

You laughed quietly at the excited sounds Numby was making. It was very difficult to resist his charms.

"Agree Topaz. Topaz?"

She continued to look at you through her eyelashes, resting his cheek with one hand and frowning slightly. You looked at woman worriedly and called her name again.

Your voice seemed to bring her out of some kind of trance.

Topaz shook her head and gasped at the realization that you were calling her.

“Haha, sorry, I was lost in thought. Did you want something?”

She rubbed the back of her head and focused all her attention on you. You couldn’t help but notice the slight sadness in her voice, and even Numby stopped playing and began to pay attention to the conversation.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes, eh...I"

Topaz couldn't find the words? If anyone had told her that, you and she would have laughed about it. You noticed how her gaze ran over Nambi lying on your lap, and without thinking twice you put two and two together. Oh, who would have thought...

"Topaz, are you...jealous?"

After your words, an expression of shock appeared on the girl’s face. white-haired woman began to actively shake her head, fervently denying your words.

"No no! Well maybe a little... But I like watching you and Nambi have fun, I really do."

You immediately realized that Topaz had received almost no affection lately. A guilty expression appeared on your face.

Numby looked at you and seemed to understand what you were thinking.

You and Nambi “looked at each other” and a smile immediately appeared on your face, while the piglet stomped around impatiently. Topaz did not have time to react when at the one moment two bodies knocked her down, pinning her to the sofa.

She felt your warm breath on her neck, tickling her skin, one of her hands held your waist while the other stroked Numby, who settled comfortably on her stomach.

A heartfelt, loud laugh burst from her chest, making you laugh along with her.

"What is this for?"

Topaz asked, stopping laughing. You moved closer to her face and quickly kissed her lips, a light blush appearing on her pale cheeks.

"doesn't matter."

[justbelievinginmagic]

Hello! For the questions for fic writers thing, here are the questions I've chosen (they're quite a lot, feel free to answer whichever one/s u like, I'm interested in hearing your takes!):

3. What are some tropes or details that you think are very characteristic of your fics?

12. Are there any tropes you used to dislike but have grown on you?

13. Are there any tropes you used to like but don’t anymore?

17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it?

21. If you wrote a “missing scene” in Like A Waltz, what would it be?

22. Who is your favorite character in Like a Waltz and why?

30. Have you ever written something that was out of your comfort zone? If so, what was it, and how did it affect your approach to writing fic thereafter?

41. Link a fic that made you think, “Wow, I want to write like that.”

42. Have you ever received a comment that particularly stood out to you for whatever reason?

48. What’s the last fic you read? Do you recommend it?

oooo so many!! im so excited to answer them!!

3. What are some tropes or details that you think are very characteristic of your fics? i feel like a lot of my fics are inspired by something! like there is always something i can reference and build off of (ie. ariadne's thread is inspired by labyrinth and follows its plot with divergences or like a waltz is inspired by iomt mv but also mafia/ballet sources.) i also think i slowburn a lot lol. all of my fics feel very slow burn with their romances. ive heard i am very detailed when i write too! and i know i personally care about making things feel realistic both in the world and how people react to it! i think i use parentheses often to imply asides/commentary that may not fit the flow of the paragraphs - they are often attempts at giving more context or a character's feelings. i dont think i do that in Every fic though.

12. Are there any tropes you used to dislike but have grown on you? For kpop specifically, I hated AUs lol. I only read idol-verse stuff for so long. but now I mostly read just AUs haha and i rarely write idolverse stuff too lol. I used to refuse to read ABO. i thought it was just strange - but eventually you read all the non-abo stuff in kpop fanfic category and get desperate to read more lol. I like ABO now - especially when people discuss gender/societal roles within it and it feels less like a smut trope and more like a world. Sports AUs have grown on me; ill read them now when i used to completely pass them. I guess this is more AUs rather than tropes but thats what came to mind.

13. Are there any tropes you used to like but don’t anymore? Im very set into my tropes lol; i cant remember anything that im like i wont read that if i already enjoyed it. i could read the same flavor of fic with the same tropes and be like i love this lol.

17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it? Ooo I'll do this per fandom I like writing for: ATEEZ: I want to write a Tron AU for Ateez inspired by their The World albums BUT really dive into tron lore lol like the concept of tech and users/humans seen as gods. That franchise is so weird!! and i can imagine ateez in specific roles from the film! I also want to read more cult!ateez lol. i could never write it, but ive really enjoyed the psychological horror of the fics that i have read. berryunho's the answer is the best one ive ever read its so realistic and horrifying. STRAY KIDS: I have a The Borrowers AU (inspired by their Giant MV) idea. I think itd be so fun to write seriously - like where they have to navigate a world with humans as itty bitty ppls but also incorporate religious lore that the MV had. I seriously dont think I'll ever write this lol. I also want in general more MV inspired fics in SKZ!! Megaverse, NoEasy, their solos!! there is such potential for writers!! BTS: Okay I have an ON MV inspired fic! But its about a d&d-esque world where there will be a ritual/sacrifice to bring upon either a new beginning or the end. Full of magic but also physical fighting and clans and soulmates!! I've written so much for this but never really solidified a super clear story for it :(( ENHA: More. Modern. Vampire. I will read it allllll. I'd like to write a Bite Me AU too - where its more Victorian era vampire inspired or maybe reader is the vampire. I personally dont vibe with the MC having more control over the boys but itd make sense with their Orange Blood album as inspo. But I gotta finish immortal lolol.

21. If you wrote a “missing scene” in Like A Waltz, what would it be? Oooo this is fun. tbh i would've liked to include a "from the perspective of the theatre box" scene. probably early on, maybe when woo and san only knew of her. canonically, yeosang/yunho/seonghwa/san/woo had been to the theatre before meeting yn, just to watch her. id be interested to write their first impressions. and their conversations about her while in the box. more insight on their thoughts on yn basically and maybe insight on why they are in cromer in the first place? i like the idea that they didnt expect to fall for her in the beginning. i do like the mystery of not including this though!

22. Who is your favorite character in Like a Waltz and why? I really enjoy YN's characterization lol. But i feel like thats a cheat to say since she is left somewhat vague for the reader's benefit. Hmmmm I love writing Wooyoung because he feels easy to write; his dialogue comes easy and i think hes fun. but I also love Mingi's backstory the most so far and the way he expresses himself! He's going to be fun to write when we see more and more of him.

30. Have you ever written something that was out of your comfort zone? If so, what was it, and how did it affect your approach to writing fic thereafter? oooo im not so sure. i started immortal as an out of your comfort zone fic. I wanted to write in a more direct way. I have a habit of rambling lolol. so i wrote immortal chapter 1 very straightforward in my opinion. kinda clinical - even if there were emotional moments! It was interesting but it was hard for me to remain consistent. I think thats why i struggle with continuing immortal - i dont want to drift too far from that original tone but its hard.

41. Link a fic that made you think, “Wow, I want to write like that.” omg there are so so so many. ill give a few! keep in mind all of these are 18+! the answer which is about culteez!!! its scary and so good. the writer is so good at building up tension, and also keeping characters true motives secret!! i cant trust any of the boys and i love that!!! i wish i could do that in my work - i too easily add in context for things instead of letting the actual reader figure things out or be tricked! like the moon which is an ateez fantasy au!! this one transports me!!! its so carefully written and i adore all of the introspection we get inside the main character. the writer is amazing at build up as well!! the lily of adversity which is a bts soulmate werewolf magic fantasy au!! oMG I was obsessed with this plot! i love soulmate aus so much and i love rejected love. i also love an unreliable narrator. this fic lead me in one direction only to completely go in a different direction. i love the agency the oc has! love at first touch which is a bts jimin x oc soulmate idol au! another fic that let the reader make conclusions too!! i really struggle with letting my writing speak for itself without elaborating. this fic is sooo good and angsty its just so perf. i love the concept. i wish i could write a universe like this. also basically anything written by foxymoxynoona. she is the goat. she can write so much so beautiful intricate and real!!

42. Have you ever received a comment that particularly stood out to you for whatever reason? there is one person who just GETS Like A Waltz! they see every little moment, every little connection, and are like on the same brain wave as me and it just lights up my day to know that my writing is getting across so clearly!!

48. What’s the last fic you read? Do you recommend it? im currently reading bvidzsoo's black ocean series!! i started the series at the end unfortunately lol, so i just read mingi's part and im starting to read through the others. it was sooo good. i loved mingi and reader fighting and pick-pocketing from each other, so cute.

[mononijikayu]

12 & 14!!

this is based on this thing i reposted and nonnie here asked about it!!! so if you want to ask more, just look here!!!

anyway, hello nonnie!!! thank you for asking questions. i'll answer them now~

12. how does receiving and or not receiving feedback/support impact you?

i think it affects me significantly. i like having interactions with people. i'm an ambivert leaning very well to introversion. but i also love people. i love talking to you all and enjoying conversations with how the story is and how it makes you feel. or how i can make it better, how i can write more cool and well.

i want it all. humans are no islands after all. and i don't want to be an island. i wanna be someone that can just be holding warm hands with you all!!! so, please be my friends here too~ interact with me happily~ <3

14. how do you write emotional scenes? do you ever feel what the characters feel? do you draw from personal experiences?

i draw a lot from what i experience and what life i live and what i see and know. everything is real and genuine to me. it is life lived over and over again and i'm just writing them in ways that i think could be good. i'm just writing another life in the thousands i've already lived and done.

needless to say, in order for me to write, i need to be overwhelmed by the situation. as much as i write fast, i also let myself become consumed by the situation and the moment.

i tell myself, 'kayu, if you were this person, how do you think you'd react? in this life, in another life, in another universe? how would you do it? how do you make this as honest to god human as possible?'

for any scenes, but for all emotional scenes, for deep emotions, i really lock myself in there. i am the person in that moment, i am in that box for a moment.

it's like im acting, but through the page i write. i imagine the scene in my brain like a director also, im watching behind a camera and readying to say cut when it gets to the point i like.

for example, in therapy. this is based off the song therapy from tick tick boom. that song played so many times while writing, i think i sing so much of it while doing the dishes or going on a walk.

but i watch the clips from the scene it was intergral to and the various layers of emotions in that scene and even as far for covers of the song from other singers.

so the song becomes so overwhelming and then it heightens my emotional response too. because when im overwhelmed with emotion, my desire to get it off my chest becomes just as overwhelming. so i end up wanting to get it off my chest. that's when i start to imagine the scene.

okay, what does the character want? what does nanami's wife want? they're going to therapy, but does she even believe the marriage is salvagable? is therapy even something that works when it comes to this situation?

okay, if not, then how does therapy lead her to finding something to reflect about herself and her wants and her needs? what can therapy contribute to who she is and who she can be?

that seems likely, actually, so add that. write it now then polish and polish later. if it's not good, take it out. okay, repeat the song. repeat the clip. live in the moment. okay, this scene was badly written, take it out. write something new.

my process is like that. i become one with what im writing, with the inspirations, with the themes. i let myself become what the story is. i think in some ways, it is nuts, but its how i go about things.

i suppose that's often why im in my head most of the time. a lot of interesting things go on and a lot of interesting people to meet all the time. but you can only do so much until you get sleepy.

and sometimes, they also dont appear in dreams. but that's okay, there's always a next day. i'll meet those people again and live their lives with them again.

thank you so much for asking these questions!!! i hope these answers satisfy your curiosity <3

[biggestsimp12]

Hey. Do you mind writing about Akane and a gender neutral reader that has a habit of biting and scratching? Or just a habit in general that could fit what her true nature would likely be interested in, either to receive or give without it going too far?

I genuinely don't know how to explain it, and the only thing that came in was a habit. The reader doesn't do it in public of course, only in private. They likely have sharper canines and a hard grip for them to be able to do it for that long(if we go with the first suggestion).

They tell Akane about it one day but dont do anything more, even if the topic does interest her for her own reasons. And I mean it interests her a lot.

To the point where.. what if she could use that to her advantage? Turn it as a form of affection? Both? It doesn't seem fair to her for such opportunity to be left, now. And her dear is too cute to not be loved! Idk, I feel like she would pull off some shit like that.

Akane Toriyasu x GN! Reader.

—–--

—–‐-

It starts as a casual conversation, an offhand comment made in private. You mention your habit of biting and scratching—not in a painful way, but enough to leave fleeting marks, enough to feel the pressure of skin against skin. You’re careful with your words, not wanting to alarm her, but instead of reacting with surprise or concern… Akane leans in. Interested.

She hums, tilting her head slightly, watching you with something unreadable in her eyes. “Oh? That’s… fascinating.” You don’t think much of it at first. You assume she’ll brush past it like most would, but instead, she latches onto it. Like it’s something important. Like it’s something useful.

It doesn’t take long before Akane starts nudging you towards it. She never outright asks, but she invites. A casual brush of her hand, a quiet “You’re holding back, aren’t you?” when she sees the tension in your grip. She makes it easy for you, makes it seem natural—because why wouldn’t you indulge in something that feels right?

“I don’t mind,” she tells you one evening, voice barely above a whisper. “If it’s with you… I’d actually like it.” Her words are warm, gentle even, but beneath them is something far more calculated. She knows what she’s doing. She knows exactly how to make this a part of you both.

The first time Akane turns it back on you, she does it deliberately. A sharp graze of her teeth against your shoulder, a slow scratch down your arm—mimicking, testing, claiming. She watches your reaction, eyes gleaming with satisfaction when you shiver, when you accept it.

She is careful. Always careful. This is a game of patience, a slow and steady descent into something that feels mutual but is, at its core, hers to control. She never forces, never demands—she simply guides, making you believe it was always your idea.

Akane sees opportunity in everything, and you? You’re just so adorable. So easy to adore. Why would she ever let something like this go to waste?

---

The end <3

---

[leaguecollectorsanxiety]

asdfgfvgfvc it’s okay to ask me these types of questions, dont worry it’s more like ‘ezreal yaoi’ is the mascot of this blog (and kind of my major ajsfddfv)

But yeah, there were definitely some complex things when it came to yuri ships. Again, these are my observations from a lot scrolling and reading posts from the past. This essay got really long and I’m not sure if everything I’m typing even makes sense.

The main form of homophobia @ yuri ships tended to be more like ‘civil disagreements’ (aka that homophobic family member that wishes you stopped being gay). Like, only the real assholes were vocal about their distaste at yuri ships. Not in the “ew! homos!” way, but emphasizing that the hetero ship was ‘better’. The only reason why they tolerated many yuri ships was due to the fact that they got to see boobs and smutty art. I have seen posts where someone said they shipped Riven/Morgana (2012) and everyone nodded in agreement.

But there were still issues here and there. I know that I often loop back to Ezreal, but he’s kinda a factor in it all. Ezreal (2010 release) and Vi (2012 release). While their releases are 2 years apart, they received a similar treatment to how people reacted to them. When Ezreal was released, people immediately called him ‘girly’ and ‘gay’ (derogatory). A similar situation happen with Vi too. People said her appearance was too lesbian (derogatory).

And holy fuck people were bending backwards to prove both characters were straight. Specifically, people were trying to prove Ezreal was ‘not gay’ and ‘a real man’ by shipping him with Lux.

For Vi, however, people were trying to ‘prove’ she was not a 'lesbian stereotype' by trying to pair her with Jayce.

The main difference between the two is the outcome of ships. In 2013, Vi/Caitlyn literally flourished despite the fact that people were trying to negate ‘the lesbian stereotypes’. Meanwhile, all the Ezreal yaoi had to be extremely subtle and kept in small circles.

I think that the main reason why people seemed to be okay with yuri ships is due to the fact that they just saw it as someone making their barbie dolls kiss. It didn’t affect the lore and they could easily replace one of the dolls with a ‘ken doll’ at the end of the day.

People only became hostile when yuri ships (and sapphic headcanons) were actually taken seriously. Especially, when it affected the original lore. And with the demand for more canon yuri… Well, people decided to become petty and homophobic about that. When I say ‘petty’, I mean that they purposefully try to create things to ‘trigger’ sapphic fans. (And it’s becoming a common practice too :grimace:)

However, that’s going into the modern culture of fandom. And I’m not exactly seeking out those types of posts. (In fact, I don’t want to see it at all).

But let’s go back to the past. In 2012-2013, people were on Tumblr for the yaoi/yuri in their fandom. (I was there when Free!/KnB yaoi was at its peak). But there was usually a positive response to yuri ships no matter what fandom. Like, Vi was released in a year when fandoms were cheering for queer ships of all kinds. It’s likely the reason why Vi/Caitlyn fanart quickly surged in 2013.

After that year, yuri crackships were just popping out of nowhere. Like, there was plenty of hetero ships that people were fans of, but they were often okay with the existence of yuri. Garen/Katarina and Talon/Riven shippers didn’t throw a tantrum when seeing Katarina/Riven. Hell, people were cheering when they saw Katarina/Lux!

I feel like, the only time that hetero shippers saw a yuri ship as a problem… Is when it threatens the ‘straight status’ of a character. Specifically, I’m going back to Vi and Ezreal. I mentioned that people were making an effort to prove that ‘they weren’t gay because gay is an insult’. With Vi/Caitlyn taking off, people were like “oh fuck, this is actually going to make people think she’s a real lesbian”. And if Lux was removed from Ezreal, hetero shippers were frantically trying to find another girl to pair him with to make sure he remained a straight fuckboy.

I’ve talked about it before, but Star Guardian Jinx’s release (2016) is what really destroyed the curse of Ezreal homophobia. I know it sounds like a joke, but it shattered the ‘ideal hetero image’ for Ezreal/Lux.

People were looking at Jinx/Lux and realizing, this has more chemistry. More chemistry than Riot’s promotional teasing for Ezreal/Lux.

People wanted more of whatever the fuck was going on between the red magical girl and the pink magical girl. And because Jinx and Lux were already Riot’s favorites, they were bound to always get new skins and receive the spotlight for promotional animation (ex: Wild Rift and Valoran Town). Like, no matter where you go, League fans were delighted with them.

But you need to remember: neither of them are confirmed as lesbians.

Because the moment that Neeko was released and confirmed lesbian, some people took a sharp turn into lesbophobia. People were just in denial of Neeko being a confirmed lesbian. But you know what. The queer fans of the League fandom were ready to defend her.

Because you see… K/DA dropped a month before her release. People got into League because of all the K/DA yuri that exploded across Twitter and Tumblr. Like, these are fresh fans that downloaded League because they needed more yuri of the fictional kpop gorlies. (Although, most of them just stayed within musicverse and didn’t really look into other characters being sapphics). Other than that, a lot of people were down bad to see K/DA yuri. However, being that musicverse doesn’t affect lore… People were okay with it because it was ‘fanservice yuri’.

The reason why I say that is that the ‘Warriors’ cinematic introduced everyone to Ezreal/Kai’sa (literally one of the K/DA members that people joined League for). It was kinda… Like it was a backup hetero ship if Lux could not be paired with Ezreal. The League fandom seemed to ‘politely clap’ that K/DA didn’t mess with the main universe. And that’s how you know; people in the fandom were happy with yuri if it didn’t touch the canonverse.

And I understand that some people will want to use these words. Specifically to defend Arcane’s impact on the lore. But that’s really a talk that you want to DM me for. All I can say is that I try my best to understand both the old and new fandom.

[stfulia]

Hi chat

Hi, wtf tho?.

I met this friend (P) last year and i quickly started to trust him, which is weird cause of my trust issues. The reason i felt so confy was because he did NOT know the people i was talking about. (pd: i dont talk shit about them, just overthink about the way i feel about them). So basically the first thing i talked about when i started being friends with him was that friends becoming friends with my friends lowkey made me feel bad, cause many times before, had happened to me that they become BETTER friends between each other and i was left out. He said he agreed and that he feels the same. I dont really care about them just being friends, i just dont want them to "replace" me or make me feel left out by my OWN friends. (ig thats understandable)

So i have this other online friend (OF-online friend cause why not) who i know for like 4 years now. I appreciate a lot my online friends cause ive always trusted them in order to talk about feelings, i guess because i dont feel it THAT much real as it would feel if i vented irl. I like to gatekeep my onine friends because i have some bad trust issues thinking they could tell whatever im talking about to someone else. I know im a bit paranoid but i literally cant help it, i need that kind of TRUST in order to feel confortable around you.

Then, few months ago, i dont really know how, but OF sent a friend request on instagram AND bereal to P, cause when i really love my friends, i talk about them with others and they knew each other because of that. Firstly i asked P to not accept it, cause he KNEW that annoyed me a bit. Well, he did, and also said "yeah but i dont talk with her" and i was like "okay, youre right". Then they started to react to each others bereals and they NEVER react to mine, which made me feel a bit weird ngl. But then ONE DAY i just know they started talking by photos via instagram. And they talked about their personal stuff, THINGS THAT THEY DONT TALK WITH ME, LIKE???.

Okay, so when they started talking i acted like i didnt care, cause i decided to trust them and i liked them to get along very well. But one day, OF asked me if P was flirting with her, which was like 💀💀💀. Ofc i asked him (p) and he said he was just joking and that she wasnt even his type, which i actually do believe. But since OF saw that i was lowkey jealous of them being that """flirty""" she jokes about having a crush on him and dating him or sexual stuff that i dont even want to talk about. Ofc i took everything as a joke, cause it was JUST a joke, right?.

Time passed and when i met with P irl, cause we often do, he is constantly taking pictures about everything to reply to OF. And i admit that it makes me jealous, he is very friendly with me, he is VERY affectionate* and i lowkey just wanna fell special ig. I guess im just overreacting but i cant help but feeling this way. So, the thing is, lately, he has been acting distant with me. Yes ofc he has more things to do than me, but yk, i always start the conversation, and it feels like whenever i text him, he is just distracted, i doesnt feel like him anymore. YES, THERES THE CHANCE HES BEEN FEELING BAD FOR ANY REASON BUT IF HE DOESNT EVEN TELL ME, HOW CAN I KNOW???.

*P is just like a best friend to me. I am very very closed to people, i struggle receiving any type of affection, but with him, for some reason, i like to receive hugs, very long hugs. A long hug while watching a movie, if you get me.

So this afternoon, P texted me first (i was even excited) and asked me to play roblox this night. And i was genuinely HAPPY cause i just wanted to spend time with him. Then OF texts me saying that we were gonna play roblox but with her (OF) and another loved online friend of mine(OF2). So what i could only think about was that he has been dry to me while he was planning playing roblox with them💀. YES, I KNOW they ALL invited me, but the starting point was NOT TALKING TO MY ONLINE FRIENDS, and i have tolerated TOO MUCH with OF, i cant tolerate it nomore with OF2. SO, i told P that i dont really feel like it because i dont like them being friends with each other. AND THEN P TOLD OF THAT HE COULDNT PLAY CAUSE OF ME. AND THAT MADE ME SO MAD. CAUSE WHY WOULD YOU EVEN TELL HER THAT?? IT WASNT NECESSARY. I know its the truth, but sometimes, truth just needs to sit in silence between those who know it.

AND, what did you do? Call me inmature, call me jealous, call me toxic, call me avoidant, IDC. I just need to push away them, push away EVERYONE, so i lowkey ghosted them. I TOLD THEM THAT I NEEDED SPACE AND TIME TO PROCESS WHATEVER IM FEELING AND I MADE MYSELF CLEAR THAT THEY CAN BE FRIENDS WITH EACH OTHER IF THEY WANT TO, JUST KNOW I WONT LIKE IT. But i feel like they didnt get it cause their response is rude and mean. I mean, i dont expect them to talk to me like a princess, but who is annoyed here is I, me, myself, not you wtf?.

SO YEAH, THATS PRETTY MUCH WHAT HAPPENED AND WHAT I THINK OF. I just wanted to vent cause now i lowkey cant (my closest friends are them and now i cant tell anyone my feelings), and if you have something to say ill ofc be super happy to read it.

SORRY IF THERE WAS A MISTAKE OR SMTH, ENGLISH IS NOT MY FRIST LANGUAGE, and sorry for the HUGE text.

Thanks chat.

[vanikolya]

Good morning, may i make a request?

Capt. Spaceboy x reader cuddling/affection headcannons.

If you're not too busy that is. Now have a great day!

cw: none

reader info: they/them, no gendered terms used

notes: ofc!! i really should get to my other requests soon tbf but i've adopted a new post theme and im way too lazy atm to make more banners like this space boyfriend one. and you have a good day too anon! (update bc i wrote this note like several months ago: not me writing halkenna all cute and wholesome all the time as if i dont (affectionately, i love him with my whole heart) headcanon him as not actually being a great partner long term help LMAO)

SPACE BOYFRIEND CUDDLING / AFFECTION HCS

this funny little space guy is really big on physical affection so woah ur really in for a lot here

he's pretty clingy, and likes to cuddle whenever possible and whenever you're comfortable

watching a film? cuddling. playing games? cuddling. reading? cuddling.

the type of guy to hug you from behind if you're stood up doing something (like cooking etc), and to be happy for you to do the same with him

his favourite like cuddling thing though is when you're both in bed or on a couch etc and you're cuddling and talking and, that's just it, you're not doing anything else, it's just the both of you laying in each others arms having a little chat and maybe ending up taking a little nap

he especially enjoys this if he knows you've had a stressful day; of course, he loves it when he's had a stressful day and later the two of you have a little cuddle/talk/nap, but there's just something about knowing that he's doing something to help you to relax after a bad day that he really loves

in terms of general affection- i mean he literally adores it. he'll be affectionate with you like it's nothing but the moment you return it he's reacting as if you've just got down on one knee and proposed

hand holding? absolutely. literally almost whenever it's practical; walking together, going somewhere out with friends, i had more examples but i forgot how to word any of them help

i also think he'd really like giving and receiving little kisses, like specifically kisses on the cheek, forehead, back of the hand, etc, usual kisses have their benefits but there's something so wholesome and lovely to him about those other types of kisses

halkenna is also affectionate in non-physical ways, such as loving words, usually portrayed through him writing songs for you, i feel like sometimes he's just so overwhelmed by how much he loves you and all the things he wants to tell you about how much he cares and how lovely he thinks you are, and all the things he loves about you (practically everyth-) so it's a lot easier for him to sort it out in song lyrics that take more time instead of just outright telling you. i think i might have already said that in my alphabet headcanons but oh well

though sometimes he can be a little too, perhaps concerningly affectionate, remind him you need personal space sometimes pls he's not doing it on purpose. probably

[redheadbigshoes]

my non-lesbian friend agrees w me about bi lesbians and i told them lesbians are the only ones actually reblogging informative posts and how it feels really isolating...they haven't reblogged any either despite this. i cant help but fear maybe they just dont want to lose followers (i myself lost over a dozen, possibly dozens, not sure what i started with), but i don't want to assume. i know i should just ask them but i feel like a demanding asshole. i just wish others publicly stood up for us sometimes

I think a lot of non-lesbians actually agree with us about our opinion on “bi lesbians”, but they still don’t publicly show their support, maybe because they’re afraid of how some of their friends might react or maybe because they’re afraid of receiving hate. Still not an excuse though.

Well if they care more about losing followers than actually expressing their opinion on things…

If they’re really your friend they’ll understand you questioning them about showing support about smg that affects your identity.

I think you should ask them. Like I said, if they are really against “bi lesbians” and if they’re really your friend then their reaction isn’t going to be negative.

[lizandbo]

Snuggly s/o with bnha bois

as you see I’m trying to write and post a lot cuz I feel bad

prolly no one cares but yk

kirishima

- this man won’t care

- he would want all the snuggles in the world

- if your busy with almost anything he would get upset

- he’s just so used to the way you treat him

- just snuggles is all his mind would say

- would almost probably start losing his training time because of it

- maybe idk

- he’ll be wanting to be more cuddlier than you

- so y’all might be in some intense cuddles sessions

- so many fucking cuddles

- will kiss your knuckles and compliment you each kiss

- ya guys will prolly have a competitive competition about who can cuddle With the most best quality cuddles ever

- if you do do this he will eat and cuddle at the same time

- kiribby would feed you kinda forgetting he has his own

- just all the fluffiest fluff of the fluff kind

Tenya

- look hes a bit shy the first time or 5 but that that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love your cuddles

- he jus gotta get used to it

- like a month or two

- but when he gets into he gets into it

- very stiff the first couple times it jus not that great tbh

- he feels like everything is too good to be true

- omfg he blushes so much and gets so hard

- I feel like he twitches when he’s nervous

- your jus hugging iida and kissing like theres no tomorrow

- while he’s malfunctioning inside like there is also no tomorrow

- he’s kinda insecure bout everything when ya guys cuddle

- like the one movement and you could die kinda thang

- if you question him while you just tryna cuddle your boyfie like twitching much?

- he’ll get so confused like he doesn’t know that he makes it a living hell because of his mental rules

- like dont do this position cuz they might be uncomfortable like bitch you just want some snuggles but all you get is struggles

- but after the 20th time cuddling then he’s the master

- just take your time amf he’ll be the best cuddle to cuddle with

- jus make sure that your not sleeping with a wooden board

sato

- yeah you guess it but he def baking you shit and cuddling no matter what

- look your gonna gain at least a pound or two when your dating him kk? - he so big and broad and no matter what your size he’ll try to make you feel small if you want to feel that way

- he’s also very snuggly but give him a chance or two cuz he a lil shy too

- his face is priceless when you hug him first

- ok let’s be honest here he doesn’t have the balls to initiate the first physical action

- I’m sorry but he doesnt

- so when you do go first he’ll be all for it with a bit of shyness

- if ya wanna cuddle all day he will cuddle all day

- one day he will wanna test who cuddles better

- also he loves when y’all nuzzle into each other’s necks or any area

- he jus has these really fluttery butterflies in his tummy

- he jus wanna be lovedddd

Katsuki

- hella hesitant

- he doesnt wanna hurt you if you do cuddle togther

- blushes like a mf tomato

- he wants to face you but he doesn’t wsny you to see his face so he just nuzzle his face into something

- be stiff as a board the first few times

- over time he’ll come into an end of being overreacting each time you touch him out of affection

- he’s lovign this but he just doesn’t know how to react enough to your standards

- so awkward trying to receive your affectionate side

- just squeeze him and he’ll combust

- he’ll be angry at himself by acting childish and being so weak to the point of not knowing how to handle a simple situation so he jist goes all in for it

- you love all of it and just tell him yk bring it in

- thinks its cringy af sometimes

- hols your hands wihtout looking

- kiss his face and he’ll be so blushy it’s so fucking cuteee

- look everything bout him is cute but when you cuddle AHHH his cuddles are so good

[the-s1lly-corner]

knd villains crushing on the reader

something something more group post shenanigans, might use this prompt for other fandoms as well! toiletnator already had this prompt done for him, you can find it in the masterlist!

characters: father, knightbrace, cuppa joe, spankulot, stickybeard

notes: reader is gn

cws: none

father

jealous man, he can get a bit worked up if someone steals you away or tries to make a move on you

luckily he doesnt wait long to try to make any moves on you, opting to try to ask you out fairly quickly... and its only partly caused by that jealousy! the main reason being he doesnt want to wait, he just wants an answer to he can react accordingly!

leaves you gifts in the meantime, dont ask why hes buying you so many things he just wants to is all! yes yes thats the reason

definitely the type to stare at you with his mouth hanging open like a fool if you do something that really gets to him- though the only indication to you that hes doing it is his pipe nearly falling onto the floor

hes a little bit like a cat about it, though... initiates but hardly reciprocates if you return the energy before things get more serious

mostly due to him not knowing how to full react to receiving your affection because of inner issues but thats another post for another day

spankulot

so so so obvious, he does the hand shakey thing after you two interact and hes giddy the entire interaction even if he tries to act casual

uses any excuse he can to hang around with you- do you want him to go to the store with you? he can carry things! are you a villain, and if so do you want to work with him on something? please please say yes!

talks about you a lot, he probably gets eye rolls from the other villains

he can get a little bashful but i dont think it would take him long to try to ask you out on a date, his eagerness gets the better of him and shushes his nerves

looks at you with so much love in his eyes

knightbrace

similar to father in the way that "hes like a cat", but that may be mostly due to his vigilante style... he approaches you only occasionally

his love language is reminding you to take care of yourself- mostly your teeth but he reminds you to take care of the rest of your body!

pretty normal about his feelings, though i can easily see him suppressing them so he can focus on his work.. things will likely end up building up as you make him fall harder

will only confess his feelings to you if push comes to shove- like something happens to you that gives him a good scare, or you ask him out yourself

slowburn with some denial, my beloved

stickybeard

very VERY open about his feelings for you, even outright flirting with you to your face! he cracks jokes about it too to try to get a smile from you

the most confident in himself, he wastes no time to ask you out on a date

leaves you your favorite candy because it made him think of you

hes not as chatty about it as spankulot- the other villains know but sticky isnt going to talk their ears off about you

once more, hes very forward and confident about the entire thing- its hard not to fall for that charm!

cuppa joe

hes very confident about stickybeard, but honestly? i think he might actually be the most confident and forward- hes got the charm, hes got the charisma- he can make it work!

loaded just like father so hes going to get you "just because" gifts to try to get on your good side

bro would literally dedicate a coffee blend/drink to you just to get his feelings across, thats some real love right there

also openly flirts with you, he cracks some jokes but a majority of his lines are just outright telling you that he thinks you're "a pretty little thing" and that he wants to spend more time with you

some people might actually think you're already dating thanks to him being so open about it

[dailytatsu]

Hello! I saw request were open so i was wondering if i could request some headcanons of the Archons and/or the Adepti meeting a God reader who is the God of Chaos and destruction. The reader is not a Archon tho and travels all over Teyvat cuz small bits of destruction were ever they go. They're pretty mischievous and somewhat smug but despite how they act they're actually a good person. They dont mean to cause problems(most of the time anyways) chaos follows them were ever they go. Idk if you have a character limit but if you do please tell me so i wont make a mistake again. And if there is you can just do Zhongli and Xiao. Optionally could you make them a dendro user, there not a lot of dendro content and if not thats fine. I understand. Could you make the reader Gn or Non-binary they/them pronouns please? If not male reader is totally fine. Im so sorry for the long post and I hope you have a good day/night!

Ohmy, it’s my first time just writing headcanons! I’m use to write a lot, so let’s hope I did it right (^ ^' )7

Thanks for the request! ✨

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[HC] God of Chaos! Reader and the Archons + Xiao

Characters: Zhongli, Xiao, Venti, Shogun Raiden (Ei).

Gn! Reader

I tried doing it with everyone but I’m no still that confident to try writing with some characters ＿|￣|○

Sorry for any mistakes!

Request are open!

Genshin Masterlist

Second part ->

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VENTI

To be honest, he didn't notice your presence at first. He had other concerns on his mind that day to perceive the chaotic (and slightly threatening) aura that Mondstadt was infected with that day.

Barbatos is a person of habit, so he couldn't help but be curious when the crowd in front of him began to look a little agitated instead of seeming to enjoy his lyre and his songs.

But then a series of domino events appeared in front of his very eyes.

The purity of the chaos was such that he felt overwhelmed, even without the white-haired boy around, if it wasn’t Bennett fault, then how was it possible for everything to be ruined in such a short time?

His patience ended when, out of nowhere, the strings of his lyre jumped close to his face as they snapped. Making that awful noise that couldn’t mean nothing good.

Okay, enough, who is messing around in here? No more joking in his nation!

He concentrated a little, a faint but unique presence kept his nerves on edge, as if he was being watched from afar. He moved away from the busy areas and then chased that ephemeral energy to the highest point of the church, where the bells were ringing in an irregular and stressful way.

Then he found you. Snoozing against one of the columns, somewhat tired because the trip you made to reach Mondstadt.

Surprisingly, Barbatos understood you since the first exchange of words. A god of chaos who was also a free spirit, you followed no rules ever written in Teyvat, and you had no plans to apologize for the mess you made.

Both of you were Zhongli’s worst nightmare, but that’s another story.

He managed to through your arrogance and your teasing nature that you, in fact, were a lonely spirit that liked to witness the life from above of everyone.

The difference between teasing someone accidentally and committing a crime was really visible, but he still couldn't help but feel like he should scold you after your mere presence messed up with the guild's baskets full of fish.

But hey! He also enjoy the company! Venti tried to teach you how to enjoy the calm and the whisper of wind, music can also contain chaos, feelings, old stories waiting to be told again, expressions and desire united, in a wonderful piece of-

As you yawned his lyre broke up again. Making clear the message.

Okay, not even God of Freedom and Wind can control chaos. Anyways, what a tragedy, but there’s nothing a simple bard can do, smh.

“Do you like kids, don’t you?” He said once, after a nice day of hearing him sing before your chaos reached his little concert. Again watching everyone from above on the hands of the statue, with your attention caught by some kids playing tag.

“… I don’t know what do you mean.” Once discovered you had no choice but to remain defensive, pretending to be disinterested.

“Heh, you aren’t a good liar.” It may not be the wisest thing to make fun of someone who could destroy the place where you were resting, but Venti was confident that he knew you well enough to know that you were not so explosive. “You know!, I just have some pieces, but I think it’s because they are little walking concentrations of pure and innocent chaos, am I wrong?”

He wasn’t, no at all. But you would never confess something that embarrassing.

This guy wrote a ballad about the days when Mondstadt got immerse with that strike of bad luck. Kind of an apology of not being able to handle the situation.

Now there’s the rumor that says that, every time somebody sings that song, something unlucky will happen in front of you.

The song is cursed.

One night when the moon was shining on the Cider Lake his well tuned ears distinguished a melody that was broken from time to time by the accidents of his performer, distracting him of his way to look for you.

It could be painful to listen to, but Venti could certainly feel the dedication of the one who was playing the imperfect song.

The ballad of the god of chaos, hummed like a lullaby that instead of making you sleep makes you question the events of the day. Wishing for the slightest thing to be different after an exhaustive week of peace and tranquility.

A lonely spirits cursing their existence, sitting in the highest point of a stranger’s palace, where you can reach the sky by only rising your hand.

The next day, Barbatos invited you to drink some wine, this time near Windrise to avoid accidents in the city.

As he almost dropped the bottle when a lot of slimes were attracted by your presence, he confirmed the theory about that the way to spend time with you would not be his personal definition of hanging out.

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ZHONGLI

Okay, there’s only two scenarios that could happened when you set a foot in Liyue.

Old man has a soft spot for you for being a relative young deity.

Or he’s always lecturing you for not having control of your aura and powers.

How u dare bringing chaos to the nation of order? It’s that a death wish?

Jokes aside, you’re not really a threat. And he could sense that after he saw how you tried to avoid having direct contact with the city. Rex Lapis found your silhouette jumping and crossing through the mountains until reaching the fairest point that allowed you to enjoy the view of the streets that were filled with life and light as the sunsets.

He even noticed how you sighed in frustration when a storm started out of nowhere. A rain dedicated just for the arriving of the God of Chaos. Not even bothering of getting shield, you stayed in your place to look at all the people who were getting back to their places.

The rain seemed to stop over your head, for a second was enough to stop you from being cruelly swamped by the very weather you had created. An elegant umbrella covered you, the long awaited surprise you expected from someone as outdated as Morax.

You looked up, and found his expression calm and attentive, watching you. As if he had made a great discovery that he could not believe

“May I have a moment of your time to keep you company? Letting out your sorrows in the middle of a torrential storm is not what I would recommend as way to spend a good day.”

“… What are you talking about? Get in your own business, old man.”

“Well, you should know that a sorrow shared is a sorrow halved.”

Next time you knew was that he was helping you to dry your hair with a towel once you let him guide you to his place.

Zhongli picked you up like a abandoned cat that day. Even if having you near meant to deal with new the roof leaks.

Also kept you away from Hu Tao, if you two ever get along for being partners in crime he would seal himself underground-

For all the time you spend exploring Liyue, there he was. Like a little kid showing his treasures. But also like a worried father looking after his child for them not to stumble making their first steps.

Look at you! Almost crushing those Treasure Hoarders when a bunch of rocks fell down after you jumped at the edge of the cliff.

Wait, no- come back here! You should verify the surroundings and be aware of the weight of your power if you’re going to explore in that bold way. You, chaotic brat.

Another one who believed fervently that your mood was to blame for the constant chaos you caused. He also tried to show you the wonders of peace and calm, teaching you how to prepare tea while listening to the storyteller (also both being a little far away from the rest of them, just in case).

He couldn’t help but sigh when the teapot arm broke as soon as you tried to serve the tea. What a waste, he thought.

You apologized to him, kind of stressed with yourself after you took all the pieces with your bare hands to run away with them. Leaving a confused Zhongli behind.

Next day you were back, with the teapot repaired and just like new.

He let out a lot of thankful words, some flattering and a lot more cheesy things that you never had received before.

With that unexpected affection you couldn’t help but react flustered; then a cat that was chasing a bird jumped through a lot of decorations and merchandise, almost starting a fire as the chained events kept going.

Yeah,, uh, Zhongli got some useful mental notes about you and your chaos that day.

Hey, before you go, want to make a contract? You won’t regret it!

But as the wandering spirit you were you had no problems in reject his offer, but also promising that you would visit Liyue if he wanted you to.

Of course he wanted! But.. maybe next time you should stay in Huaguang Stone Forest instead of roaming near the city,,

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XIAO

Tried to kill you.

I mean, your aura is threatening and full of a destructive energy, how is possible that you weren’t a demon to eradicate??

Sorry, but he had a point.

Your first met was on your way to reach Huaguang Stone Forest along with Zhongli for introduce you with the Adeptus.

Xiao, in the other side, thought that you were about to attack Morax from behind, so he just struck against you. With his polearm near to go through your chest, just stopped because you felt him before.

Lifting your hand at his direction, summoning chaos, this time, on purpose. The wind gained a wrathful nature and the biggest roots that were hiding under his feet rose to caught him.

And when you were about to hit each other Zhongli’s shield appeared just in time to separate both of you. Preventing a real catastrophic event.

Now stop fighting and introduce to each other.

Nice(n’t) to meet u.

What if you tried to awake Azhdaha to bring chaos and destruction to Liyue? What if you wanted to summoned Osial? What if… ?

Zhongli had to confirm and promise to him that those cruel possibilities won’t be a near future for respecting the real reason of your travel.

No matter if he wasn’t comfortable with your presence, it wasn’t his decision to allow you to roam freely, so he had to get use to it.

He immediately knew after hearing about your nature that was your fault that lately there were a lot more demons and monsters. Even his karma was getting more painful than usual.

(If you ever meet Hu Tao, please think twice before doing Xiao a prank)

You both didn’t interact a lot, and being honest, it was better that way.

He hadn’t a single intention of talking with you again until the day you were practicing the song that your Anemo friend taught you. By the other hand, Xiao noticed that the melody had the same nature as the one he once heard before being consumed by the karma.

It wasn’t a flute, but a worn lyre that was still in one piece after weeks of being repaired again and again.

“That song… ”

“Do you know it?” Xiao just nodded, staying in silence, being your very first audience even if you still have a lot to learn about playing a lyre.

It wasn’t as effective as the original, but was still… nice, kind of nostalgic.

Next morning, the Yaksha called for you. Made you stay still in the middle of a plain and then he disappeared of your sight.

He abandoned y- wait, what’s that? Why those monsters has that weird dark aura?

You were about to defend yourself until Xiao appeared back just in time to defeat them.

That day you became his personal bait for demons and monsters. Naturally you attracted chaos, so anyway you were, there will be also something to fight.

I guess this is your way to pay for all the troubles you made for him and his duty, so no complaining about it.

If you ask for a unexpected experience to Ganyu she would said that once she found both of you fighting along against the catastrophe, looking after each other’s back and almost having a perfect synchrony.

➷➹➷➹➷➹➷➹➷➹➷➹ ➷➹➷➹ ➷➹➷➹ ➷➹ ➷

SHOGUN RAIDEN; EI

Also tried to kill you.

Well, the puppet tried to.

And then Ei tried when you had the opportunity of facing her.

But since killing a god just mean the releasing of a lot, pure, energy she couldn’t afford that risk, much less considering your “speciality”.

Who knows what would happen to Inazuma if your vital energy burst across the nation. Just like that old story about Sal Terrae and their goddess.

She just defeated you. Letting you rest and recovering in the midst of the plane of her reality within her mind. Your inert body in the middle of the battlefield as she kept meditating.

When you woke up she ignored your presence, but also denying your complaints about letting you go out back.

In her words, you were a burden, another enemy of eternity. Something as unpredictable as you and your “accidents” couldn’t get along with her utopia.

Ei could banish you from Inazuma, but she knows your type. Stubborn and not accepting the most simple orders to obey.

She knew that you would found a way to be back.

It’s better like this.

And in the hypothetical case of you being freed when she trapped the traveler (kicking you out) and then having a chance to see her again after the end of the war, then things would be somewhat different.

There’s not that much of civilization on some islands, so she allowed you to explore as much as your heart wanted. But if something serious happen, she promised that would end her work in the middle of the sea so your remains never be found.

Okay, message clear. Just do chaos near monsters and bandits, got it,,

Even if she wanted to spend some time with you and telling you some stories about Inazuma and other gods she couldn’t found the right time to call you at her presence.

As the current ruler of Inazuma she was busier than the rest of Archons you have meet. Maybe just some letters now and then like a way to keep a logbook, but not really a face to face talk.

Until she got the opportunity of a day off, just to found you messing around near some ruins. Trying to solve a puzzle before your speciality strikes in. The structure fell down after your fingertips reached the stone.

When the dust dissipated, you discovered her figure judging you from the other side of the remain ruins.

Give her a good reason for not errase you from the map, I dare u.

You felt the worst was about to come when Ei ordered you to follow her after a long sigh. Crossing her arms and starting to walk away from the bunch of old and worn rock.

Plot Twist, she actually invited you to rest under a tree, asking in her serene voice the reason for your journey and your origin. In such a direct way that it seemed more like a sentence than a talk to get to know each other better.

You answered what you could remember and then the silence stayed like the only way of interaction between you two.

Ohno, you know this pattern. Something’s about to happen-

“There is some strange beauty in the chaos, it may be the calm after the storm, but the catastrophe itself is seen as a necessary evil to appreciate the stillness. How much it would last until the lighting hit the valley?”

“So I arrived to keep order between the humans?”

Well yes, but actually no.

“… You see, if there is nothing but order and a lack of problems, mortals are likely to create them on their own. Their minds feels the need to be tested, to prove their worth, so I guess some of your chaos may be part of the history.”

“… then shall we take a walk in Inazuma?” You did not know if you were right, but you thought you saw a faint smile through his lips in the same way that lightning can be seen in the sky.

“I’ll allow it.” She said.

Her only condition was for you not to approach the huge boxes of fireworks down the street.

[fairestwriting]

heartslabyul index

all

with s/o who's reckless with their own safety

riddle rosehearts

soulmate au

reaction to reader falling asleep under a tree

reaction to crush describing their type like in guy.exe

reaction to innocent crush singing touch you

vil's reaction to reader (his younger sister) dating him

setting reader up with his vice dorm leader but falling for them in the process*

with vampire s/o who's craving his blood

with s/o who plays a lot of otome games

with reader who's always surrounded by cats

having a crush on a hopeless romantic fem reader

reaction to malleus simping for someone

reaction to yuu sleeping with a body pillow of him

with cyber goth s/o

how he would be like as a brother

comforting tired s/o with cuddles

s/o gets amnesia and falls for someone else

catching his crush checking him out

reaction to yuu crying because he reminds them of their older sibling

with s/o who sings suddenly like a disney princess

with s/o who's taking care of a cat that oddly resembles him and rivals him getting all of s/o's affection

jade and floyd's reaction reader (their little sister) dating him

watching a disney classic with him

carnival date with his s/o

with s/o who's similar to morticia addams

poly relationship between trey, riddle, chenya and reader

receiving handmade gift from s/o

with s/o who despises tea and prefers coffee

with s/o who loves and makes good tea

playing the pocky game with his s/o

reacting to s/o wearing a maid outfit

crushing on vice dorm leader's sister

with tall and flirty fem s/o

wearing a maid dress

with himbo mc

finding out crush is related to the queen of hearts

makeout session with lipstick stains

with gentle giant boyfriend

visiting mc's world

reaction mc slapping his mother

fem s/o distracts him from studying with kisses

being tsundere for fem crush

getting a goodnight kiss from yuu

being hit by spell that makes him hold his crush's hand for hours

finding s/o's drawings of him

with s/o who doesn't put effort into celebrating their birthday

trey clover

riddle's reaction to reader (his younger sister) dating him*

lilia and silver's reaction to reader (also lilia's child) dating him

setting reader up with his dorm leader and falling for them in the process

kissing fem s/o who's too cute for her own good

with patient and affectionate s/o

getting back together with his ex

poly relationship between trey, riddle, chenya and reader

with cuddly fem s/o

with delinquent-looking s/o who somehow carries themselves elegantly

realizing he has a crush

ace trappola

older sibling-like reader

riddle's reaction to reader (his younger sister) dating him*

with a reader who's overprotective of grim

reaction to s/o ruffling his hair

getting caught checking out fem crush

reaction to fem reader cutting off most of her hair

"if we're single by 30, let's get married"*

with very photogenic/videogenic fem mc

jade and floyd's reaction to reader (their little sister) dating him

reaction to usually nonchalant s/o getting flustered

with tomboy fem s/o

with shy, socially awkward s/o

mc shows him popular music from their world

with parental figure mc who's tired of their antics

reaction to being drawn

reacting to seeing reader cry

deuce spade

older sibling-like reader

riddle's reaction to reader (his younger sister) dating him*

with a reader who's overprotective of grim

getting caught checking out fem crush

with physically affectionate s/o

reaction to fem reading cutting off most of her hair

with small but very strong s/o

getting a massage from his s/o

"if we're single by 30, let's get married"*

with very photogenic/videogenic mc

mc shows him popular music from their world

with parental figure mc who's tired of their antics

bridal carrying fem s/o who sprained her ankle

with motorcycle racer male s/o

reaction to being drawn

reacting to seeing reader cry

cater diamond

riddle's reaction to reader (his younger sister) dating him*

malleus' reaction to reader (his younger sister) dating him

getting caught checking out fem crush

with feline beastman s/o

with patient and affectionate s/o

yuu showing him music from their world

opening up to his s/o

reaction to usually nonchalant s/o getting flustered

with cuddly fem s/o

bridal carrying fem s/o who sprained her ankle

with fem s/o who can't handle cold

helping his friend get over a cheating ex

[cosmicjoke]

(insert Adele song) Hello, its me.

It wasn't actually an ask, it was more like I wanted to reply normally, but Im scared of that aggressive anon to get at me, so I am hiding as Anon.

I was basically trying to school that mofo. It was as if Anon wanted another mental breakdown from Yashiro, and till then it's obvious he regrets it all, and not with a smug smile? That Anon to me felt like they read the manga in one night, and focus only on what they want and not what they should.

They forget Yashiro IS a natural liar. Lies are his shield. Lies has been one of the things that made him survive. He lied for decades about his masochism, his love for pain. DECADES of lies. You cant expect him to suddenly tell truths to someone he meet again for days.

Your AA (aggressive anon) also seem to forget Yashiro is starve of love, to the point he doesn't know what that is. How that feels. Obviously he doesn't know how to react when he received that, or when finally he understands that, or when he is slowly accepting that. Yashiro right now is still in an accepting phase.

Remember he lived in a love-less environment and was only done violence since 8yo. Imagine living in that kind of life... cause I cant. Even Misumi treats him that way, I hope AA didnt ignore that. Least not forget he has lived under the care of Yakuzas since his teenage years? Living and breathing that kind of life is only natural to expect him to exhale violence as well, like shooting Doumeki or hitting that Hirata crew with a stick.

It was a shocker to him to realise that 'thing' that we normal people call love exists. In referencing the forbbiden fruit panel, which is Doumeki. He he has known it just cant admit. Not without self-loathing attached.

Yashiro is confusing? of course he is, thats the point! Doumeki confuses the hell outta him? Didn't you (AA) see how he acts differently towards Doumeki compare to everyone else? Doumeki scares him. And still is! I dont know if this is obvious, but to me Yashiro is flustered whenever Doumeki is around. He doesn't know what to do with himself, that he may seem cold or casual, but he's really terrified.

And yes, this is Yashiro's story of self-healing. It's slow but then when have you seen a BIG wound that healed over night?

The cage bird is Yashiro and he will always be cage and in the dark for as long as Misumi has him bound to this world and Doumeki is that shimmering light that attracted him...so yeah be kind to Yashiro and let him have that glimpses of light. ( Im referencing those glitters when he thought of Doumeki. It was kinda cute. ) Lets all wait and celebrate now he's slowly healing. So much of himself he has admitted.

AA should study and broaden their understanding of trauma. How that affects people. Watch documentaries of real people. Grow some human sympathy. Saezuru must be so overwhelming to them compare to other BLs that focuses on smut. It irk me when they pass the word "suicidal" so easily like a comedy skit. In case it's not obvious, AA, this is also tag as psychological.

Anyway... that's basically it. Saezuru is not for everyone. I never have thought I would see someone like AA strolling in here, thought they only crawl in twitter and mangasites. lol

I wish you a good day, Cos. (:

Hi anaon, and thank you so much for sending in your message again! I'm really sorry I deleted it the first time, as you obviously put a lot of thought and effort into it.

And everything you said, is 100% correct.

With Yashiro, it's imperative, in order to understand his character, to also have a grasp on his background, the way he grew up, the environment in which he was raised, the abuse he suffered, and continues to suffer. You can't ever understand his character, or why he is the way he is, or why he does the things he does, without first understanding those other things. And it seems painfully clear to me that that other anon doesn't understand any of it.

And yes, exactly, lying and deflecting are tools with which Yashiro has learned to defend himself. Truly, the ONLY way he's ever had of defending himself. It's HIMSELF he lies primarily to, in fact, as a means of coping with the horrific abuse he's suffered in his life. By convincing himself he's always wanted it, that he's always liked it. It isn't out of some malicious intent, it's out of self-preservation.

And yes, again, Yashiro was raised in an environment of violence, being sexually and physically assaulted by his step-father starting at eight years old, and lasting until he was, what, 16? That kind of horror isn't even conceivable to most of us. We can only look at it at a remove, and understand objectively that it's awful. But we can never know the true pain and terror and misery of that kind of abuse unless we ourselves have experienced it. So when I see these kinds of idiots like this anon going off about how unfair Yashiro is being to Doumeki, or how he's "using" Doumeki, or whatever other tripe they were spouting, I get seriously pissed. It's just a breathtaking lack of compassion on display. And indeed, the violence of Yashiro's world continued on into adulthood. He was taken in and entrapped in the world of the Yakuza, and it was either adapt or die at that point. His entire life has been filled with violence. The only example he's ever been set in terms of solving problems, or getting out of situations, is through violence. It's all he knows. It's one of Yashiro's great tragedies, that he's a genuinely kind and compassionate person who, through no fault of his own, was born into and then later further trapped in a world of cruelty and violence. And you make a great point, when you say that for someone who's grown up knowing only cruelty and violence, it's absurd to expect them to know how to react or deal with it when someone, for the first time in their life, shows them genuine love and affection. Yashiro has never know the like. He's never been treated as anything but a punching bag and a joke. Of course it would befuddle him, to be treated, for the first time in his 36 years of life, like an actual human being. And of course it scared him, because he was also being forced, through that love, to face the reality of how he'd been treated before. To face the truth, that what was done to him was wrong, and irrevocably damaged him.

Also, this anon acts like Doumeki is the gentlest soul to ever walk, and has never engaged in or displayed violent behavior in his life. lol, okay. Doumeki is way more violent than Yashiro. For one, Yashiro hasn't, that we've ever seen, killed anybody. But Doumeki sure as hell has. He killed an entire group of men, in fact. The one's who kidnapped Niki. He beat his father nearly to death (not that it wasn't deserved), he routinely attacks and assaults people with no hesitation. Doumeki is a pretty violent person. That's not to say he's a bad person, because he's not. He's a good person. But he isn't some wilting flower that Yashiro has been oh so mean to. They whine about Yashiro shooting Doumeki without taking into any consideration the mental state Yashiro was in when he did that. The fact Yashiro was suicidal, that he was going to try and make a serious attempt to end his own life. Like you said, they toss that word around like it's some kind of joke, like it's not a big deal. It exposes just how bereft of compassion for psychological suffering they are, that they couldn't see or just didn't care how much pain Yashiro was in at that point in his life. He wanted to DIE. He genuinely did. He shot Doumeki because he was desperate. He needed to keep him away, because he knew Doumeki would intervene and prevent him from being killed, and possibly get himself killed in the process. Doumeki wasn't listening, wasn't going away, words weren't working at that point, despite Yashiro's best efforts to drive him away with them, and so he fell to the last resort of violence. He was trying to protect Doumeki, and give himself the chance to end his own life. But, again, this anon clearly doesn't understand ANY of that. As you said, this manga isn't just BL, it's a psychological study of the affects of trauma and child abuse. It deals in a serious manner with very serious subjects. If they can't handle that, then they should stop reading, right now.

Anyway, thank you for resending your message! I really appreciate it!

[palmett-hoes]

per your post "every single one of the monsters is autistic and/or adhd" will you elaborate on that?, if you do i will love you forever (not that i wont if you dont do it)

oh boy i would love to!!! unironically nothing brings me more joy than writing long, convoluted character analysis posts

---

okay so i’ve written several posts before about why andrew is autistic. his moral code, the roundabout way he communicates, his body language, his stimulation-seeking behavior, his strict adherence to transactional deals, the emphasis on honesty, and a dozen other details. at this point i just take andrew being autistic as fact, not just an interpretation

h o w e v e r  i also hc that andrew is dyslexic, which is also a neurodiverse condition

- - -

similarly, i’ve seen more than one person interpret kevin as autistic, and i absolutely agree that it fits. not just the hyperfocus on exy but mostly the way he communicates. he’s very indirect, especially in his affection but very direct with his opinions. he tries to be helpful in a material way to the people he cares about, even if he comes off as negative. he wants the people he cares about to be safe and successful so he pushes them to work hard and reminds them in measurable ways how to stay healthy. he doesn’t factor in a lot of room for emotions, so instead he focuses on quantifiable things that he can improve. i personally act very similarly. approaching someone emotionally is hard for me, so when the people i care about have problems all i can think to do is try offering solutions, check up on their well-being, etc. practicality instead of conventional sentiment is extremely common with asd

- - -

so now let’s talk about neil. i had to think on this one for a WHILE but ultimately came to the conclusion that neil is adhd, probably hyperactive type. 

like obviously neil is high energy. i would say he probably does the most exercise of anyone on the team. morning run, morning practice, afternoon practice, night practice with kevin and andrew, plus he doesn’t have a car so he runs to class (on a BIG ass campus), and goes for an extra run when he feels stressed. that’s... insane, honestly.

neil reminds me SO MUCH of this post that goes:

“Was just informed by my mom that I do in fact have ADHD and the reason I thought I didn’t was because ever since I was seven whenever I got super energetic my mom would have me go chop wood so now when I’m feeling The ADHD I go chop wood”

(phenomenal post) and that’s neil to a t. tell me this isn’t exactly how neil handles his problems and also exactly what mary would have had to do to keep her unmedicated and very energetic son focused on the task of staying alive

neil also definitely has that ADHD on/off switch with his interest. the obvious being exy which is like the definition of a hyperfixation, but you can see it in other things: the way he runs totally hot or totally cold with people, his complete disinterest in his schoolwork, the way he can’t seem to sit still long enough to follow movies. but then there’s also the hyperfocus. doing the same drill for hours on end. watching exy game after exy game. staring at andrew until time falls away

what’s more, neil on many occasions shows racing thoughts, both in an anxiety way (and anxiety often goes hand-and-hand with adhd) but also as a way to quickly and accurately take in details about people to build a character profile of them. this is what allows him to connect with the foxes, how he manages to get through andrew’s puzzles, and even how he knows what to say in order to knock riko down a peg. his brain just works so fast and it takes in a lot of very specific details and disparate information to make connections.

but also like,, neil has a HUGE problem with time blindness. like the instant he didn’t have his mother around to manage and direct him anymore he lost all sense of time. he stayed in Millport for a YEAR. and what did he keep telling himself during that time? basically “i really need to move on, but not just yet.” for a YEAR! then he gets to palmetto and he’s like “i’ll cut and run in a month or two” then he doesn’t “i’ll be gone by halloween” wrong again “i’ll leave by the raven’s game” nope. like,, the boy just has NO sense of time and he can’t seem to make himself DO anything outside of an externally enforced schedule. and even then,,, HE HAD 48 FUCKING DAYS TO FIGURE OUT SOMETHING TO DO TO NOT GET MURDERED! 48 WHOLE DAYS. he didn’t make a plan, he didn’t write down any letters with goodbyes, he didn’t GO TO THE FBI LIKE HE’D INTENDED TO THE WHOLE TIME! nah he just made out with andrew and when he finally got to zero he was just like “ah shit, that was fast. oh well guess i’ll die” and that’s time blindness, babey!

---

let’s move on to nicky. 

now i think it would be really easy to say nicky is just adhd because he’s high energy and forgetful but tbh,, i don’t think that’s all of it. like if you really look at nicky’s character and especially at his problems, he has asd problems just as much as he has adhd problems.

so nicky is dual diagnosis asd and adhd. also nicky reminds me a lot of a girl i used to know who was autistic/adhd

so, adhd:

very generally speaking, ppl with adhd will struggle with sitting still, listening to and following instructions, planning/organization, following a schedule, and some social boundaries like “appropriate” times and topics of conversation

i would say you see hints of this with nicky. he’s definitely a rambunctious personality, constantly on the move, constantly stimulation seeking. he’s very tactile. he likes to dance, he likes to party, he complains about it but he’s an elite-level athlete. he’s also decidedly very chatty, and doesn’t seem to really pay attention to what he’s saying. he distracts himself and the people around him have to keep him on track. he has some trouble with boundaries. he’s a little all over the place. he’s almost a bit of an adhd stereotype

also one thing i find interesting is that when neil sees him in the library doing work neil is surprised to see he’s capable of that, especially bc when we see the upperclassmen doing work they generally do it in their dorms or on the bus and/or with other people around. that hyper-social nicky would be alone in a quiet place is weird. but this is like the most common tip for dealing with adhd. don’t do it in a familiar space. have a designated space and time to do work. limit distractions. just a lil detail

so now, asd:

in all honesty, most of nicky’s actual problems in the narrative could be viewed as stemming from asd symptoms. his number one issue being that he has a lot of trouble with nonverbal cues (and tbh, verbal ones too). the twins are mostly quiet. andrew especially (when he’s sober) communicates primarily nonverbally, and nicky seems to have a lot of trouble with this. despite knowing them for the longest on the team, nicky honestly seems to have the least insight into the way either of the twins actually thinks or processes things. he loves them, and he’s very forgiving of them, but he fundamentally doesn’t understand them. 

the twins, andrew especially, put up a LOT of nonverbal boundaries, and nicky sort of inadvertently keeps trampling all over them. he’s touchy in a way they don’t like. he talks a lot about their personal lives to other people. he treats them like they’re joking when they’re serious. etc. and like,,, you kind of get the sense that the upperclassmen feel similarly about him. beyond the homophobia, beyond the fact that he’s loyal to andrew, the upperclassmen still treat him with this sense of,, bafflement, i suppose? it’s clear that they don’t really understand him and he doesn’t really understand them. although, nicky IS curious about the upperclassmen, while the upperclassmen are pretty dismissive of him. it reminds me of when my sweet, floppy dog tries to play with my cat. their body language is different; they’re each receiving different signals than they believe they’re sending out

only,, nicky loves people!! he likes being around them, he likes talking to them. he’s interested in their lives and stories, but it’s very clear that he can’t read between the lines on people. he has an incredibly hard time with people who expect their actions to speak for them, which is most people, but is especially his cousins.

actually this is very much also an issue that i have: things need to be spelled out for me. the way i deal with it is i ask a lot of questions. ‘how do you want me to react to this potential situation?’ ‘what are specific things that make you most comfortable?’ ‘please explain to me exactly how you feel and what has prompted those feelings?’ and i’m always communicating vice versa like that with other people. a lot of specifics in both questions and answers

and the interesting thing is, when i was skimming through the books reviewing dialogue styles for another ask, i noticed that, actually, nicky DOES do this. with neil and the upperclassmen, nicky asks a LOT of quick, clarifying questions. things that ask after tone, that ask after intent. it’s kinda sad that he does this for communicating with acquaintances, but with the twins, the people he’s closest to, he makes a lot more assumptions. and i’m really proud of nicky for having this coping skill, because i can’t imagine it’s something he grew up doing. there’s no way he was raised in an environment that fostered this kind of open communication so it must have been something he learned about much later, probably in germany with the kloses, which would also explain why he’s a lil imperfect about it

---

now last but not least, aaron

this is another one i had to think through for a long time before it felt like it fit

much like how i felt that it would be easy to read nicky as simply adhd rather than also asd, i think it would be easy to say aaron is autistic simply because he is quieter, less rambunctious. however, i actually think he’s adhd, likely primarily inattentive type

in all honesty, aaron’s #1 character trait for the first two books is basically that he’s disconnected. detached. separated both from his family and his team. not in the same forcefully apathetic way that andrew is, more,, spaced out. he’s just kind,, there. not really paying attention to what’s going on, tuning in every once in a while only if something really catches his eye/ear then tuning right back out again. just sits in his corner and plays on his phone. and the thing is, from the moments when he does tune in, you can tell that he actually does care. he backs nicky when seth insults him in tfc, and we know he cares deeply about andrew even if he’s become disillusioned with their fraught relationship. he even hangs with his family, doesn’t seem to really try and slip away to other friends besides katelyn, he’s fine spending his leisure time with the monsters. so it’s not totally apathy, he’s just,,, tuned out most of the time

and, yea, that sounds like adhd. it’s not the type that most people are familiar with, and for a lot of people this causes it to slip under the radar. it can make it hard to get help or a dx because it doesn’t fit with how adhd “should” look or how someone “should” act, but difficulty focusing your thoughts and staying in tune with the current moment is absolutely part of adhd

addiction is also a huge problem for people with adhd. a lot of stimulants affect people with adhd very differently than neurotypicals, especially in small doses, and an adhd kid who’s struggled their whole lives with the disorder might try speed or god-forbid meth or fuck even coffee and suddenly find that things are a lot easier for them. they start to self-medicate, they don’t actually know what they’re doing, and then they’re addicted, and everything spirals out of control. we don’t know too many details about aaron’s addiction other than that his mother enabled him, but wouldn’t this fit? it’s also an explanation for aaron still taking drugs at eden’s, given that cracker dust seems to be a mild amphetamine. (aaron talk to betsy about the neurocog and get an actual prescription please)

(total throw away but aaron plays videogames and videogames are like,, adhd culture)