#i feel bad for tagging the same ppl but i honestly... don't know who else would care jfnje

[my-traumacore-sideblog]

feeling rly unsafe 2day, but it's specifically bc of being a trans guy, i keep seeing stuff from cis women abt how men r always the worst and how men hav a duty 2 make their lives revolve around women or else we're sexist, how apparently men need 2 all b willing 2 lay down their lives 4 any woman or else we're just as bad as the creeps who make ppl feel unsafe 2 go out at night and yes i said people not just women but they only want 2 acknowledge it when it's a cis woman that's the victim

i did not fucking sign up for this

i did not fucking sign up 2 sacrifice my life either literally or thru dedicating my life only 2 others just because the pronoun "he" fits me better than the pronoun "she"

i should not hav 2 worry that im an inherently bad person because of being a gay trans man

i should not hav 2 worry abt being perceived as a threat bc of being a queer man of colour

i've honestly started to hav thoughts abt de-transitioning not bc being a guy in the way i am doesn't fit me but rather out of fear of the scrutiny every action of mine will b placed under

i was sexually abused as a child but i guess that doesn't matter anymore because im a man now, boys don't cry they punch ig, apparently since im a man now it means im destined 2 become that which hurt me

all i want is to be a man, in a nonbinary way yes but still a man (demi-guy), i want to love men who love me back, i want to live a quiet life surrounded by love and happiness, i want to live a gentle life

but no.... because im a man now then apparently it must make me predatory in some way

i can't de-transition... i know i wouldn't survive emotionally... so i stick with it, with allowing myself to be a demi-guy.... but it hurts knowing that me being free is perceived as dangerous, that im seen as inherently a threat to women

edit: so a terf started clowning this post, just 2 make this shit clear, this is not a fucking debate blog this is a me posting abt my feelings blog, i would've thought the url "my-traumacore-sideblog" would've made that clear

also no racism and sexism is not the same thing

yes women face oppression at the hands of men and should be allowed to talk about it but men also face oppression at the hands of women and should be allowed to talk abt it, 4 men who r not in a minority group this is usually in terms of legal stuff (how r*pe is legally categorised, custody disputes ect) but this is even more of an issue and more every day when it comes to men in marginalised communities, yk like me, yk like what i was venting abt in my fucking post i should b allowed 2 talk abt my own oppression 2 and acting like me venting abt my own oppression in a post tagged as a vent post on my vent blog makes me the same as my white oppressors is not only terf shit but also racist and it shows a lack of political literacy, a woman has just as much capacity 4 violence as a man but a queer man of colour is seen as inherently violent and a white woman is inherently seen as always being a victim but ur ok w/ these white women using that power of perceived vulnerability 2 call 4 violence against queer men and men of colour and especially queer men of colour just say u want cis women klansmen and leave im not backing down from talking abt my own oppression bc of white woman tears

anyways person who clowed is now blocked so don't bother trying 2 respond 2 my edit

[skalidra]

I’m a big fan and hoping to trouble you for advice. If writing complex or dysfunctional families, do you ever have readers who get *too* invested? As in, pushing for character bashing and a protagonist to just burn bridges? I’m glad I got an emotional response and ppl resonate with the conflict, but I’m trying for shades of grey here. It’s uncomfortable and I feel like I’ve misrepresented or poorly conveyed the story, and folks who are so avidly invested will be disappointed :(

Yes. Yes oh my god.

So, this is slightly different but this issue is actually the reason that I stopped writing the Jason in Arkham series, and eventually shut down comments on it entirely a few weeks ago.

For those unaware, JiA featured Jason having, as the name implies, a real bad time in Arkham, and no one noticing for too long (for a variety of reasons) so you had a highly traumatized Jason when he did get rescued. (And I was going to go into the recovery, and etc, but...)

People hated Dick in that story. Hated him, and screamed at him in the comments, and were vindictively gleeful about his pain when he realized that he'd messed up, and so on. No one seemed to care why he made the mistakes he did, or about how things looked from any perspective except Jason's, or the explanations of how he (and anyone else, but they didn't get the same vitriol) could have let something so awful happen.

Being the writer, I knew all those explanations, and it felt like every time someone came in looking to crucify Dick, I had to gather up all those reasons and go defend him. It was exhausting. It sucked. Every time I saw an email about a comment on those stories I hoped it wouldn't be yet-another person raging at him. It killed all enjoyment and interest I had in writing that series.

So I shut it down. It's the one thing that I've decided, even though it's not 'done,' that I'll never go back to. And a few weeks ago, after yet-another 'but why did you stop???' comment from yet-another person incapable of reading the numerous answers I'd already given in response to other comments, I finally turned off the comments on those stories entirely. I'll never have to talk about, think about, or engage with that series again, and honestly I'm relieved as fuck about that. I wish I'd done it years ago.

So, ask yourself a few things. (Little bit of guesswork here, because I can only infer what your story is about.)

First, are you enjoying writing the story? (If no, stop. It is not worth it if you're not having fun. Period.)

Is it something you could maybe fix with added tags? A blatant 'Reconciliation' or 'Unhealthy Choices' or something, if that's the way you plan for it to go, or some opposite tags, if not? (At that point, it's their fault for not reading what they were getting into. Rest easy.)

Do the characters' behaviors make sense to you? (It's most important that the story works for you. Everyone has different interpretations and reactions to shades-of-grey situations like that. Sometimes people make shitty choices or fall back into situations that are clearly unhealthy for them from an outside perspective, for a variety of reasons. Sometimes there is no clear 'moral' one in a situation. Sometimes there's no clear cut answer at all. None of these things are unrealistic, even if they may not be what readers 'want' in their specific emotional catharsis.)

If you want to be absolutely sure people understand what kind of story they're reading, you can put it in an author's note, too. People tend to be blind, but at that point they've been warned so like, oh well.

I am personally of the opinion that stories should be for the writer, and everyone else should come in secondary. So, I wouldn't worry about disappointing people, as long as you feel like you've made it relatively clear what kind of story it is. (Fuck people who don't understand. You know, kindly.)

If you still feel like people don't understand, or you're worried that you haven't gotten the balance quite right, maybe read back through what you've posted so far. Take a look from the other side and see if you can figure out where people are getting that intense investment in the outcome from. Maybe there's something small you can edit or add here or there that might help guide people towards that middle ground. Hints of equally messed up behavior on the part of the protagonist, or sweeter/kind scenes to balance out the unhealthy bits of the relationship, or something. Getting that balance can be tricky, definitely.

(I know this is a super uncomfortable thought, but you can also ask people to stop. A 'Hey I know you're invested but this type of comment makes me uncomfortable, please tone it down' could work wonders, even if it can be hard to be confrontational like that. Stating your desires, on your work, is something you are fully within your rights to do.)

At the end of the day, it's your story. What you do with it and how you choose to advertise it are your choice. If people don't like the way it went, they've got a great back button they can use.

(Good luck, Anon. I hope any of that rambling helped. If you want to ask anything else, feel free.)

[supersweetlyuniquebouquetstuff]

【30 Questions of CP, OC & Fandom★】  

| Credits to @mukami-kuron-mrsadisticcat !! Hopping in to be cool as everyone else- |

1. How long have you been in this fandom?

Around three years I guess? Taking in mind that I abandoned this blog for like two years- HAHA

2. Who's your fictional boyfriend/husband?

Sanji Vinsmoke-- AHEM, if we're talking about DL then it's Kanato xD

3. Why do you like them?

I liked him because he's cute and I believe he's one of the brothers that gets the more tender when he loves his S/O but there are other brothers who also do that so...

I think I never really liked Kanato, I remember that I focused on him because he was assigned to me on a roleplay group around 7 or 8 years ago xd

4. Have you make acquaintance with anyone that ships themselves with the same character?

Nah.

5. How do you feel about it?

No comments jdbskfbs

6. Do you feel any negativity towards them?

Uh

7. Do you like seeing their oc(s) interact with your man/woman?

uH

8. Do you feel competitive against them?

Uh

9. Confident, or pessimistic?

I'm confident all the time but as everyone it varies ksksksk

10. Would you like more to get to know about your ship, or would you rather it being lowkey?

I honestly don't care anymore for the ship, I just wanna roleplay with people because it's fun 🤸

11. Do you follow any of those people (them whom ship themselves with your fictional lover)

Yes! I used to follow @barashikki-dialoversoc when they posted more often, but it's not as active than before. Even though I always liked Bara and her headcanons and writings ksjsjs

12. Are you friends with them?

I think so 👉👈

13. What do you think about the 'stans' ?

It's alright ig, I don't care djsbdksb

14. Are you worried about plagiarism or copying of your oc(s) by others?

Nah, there's always bad people around but I'm not worried about it xd

15. How do you handle such a situation if it happens?

I would try to talk it and if that doesn't work or they block me I'll try more drastic ways (?

16. Is your cp public or only between a particular circle of friends?

It's public but ppl may not notice it at first becoz I don't talk about Tomoky x Kanato as often xd

17. Do you lock a specific cp ship, whats the reason? (I dare you to tag them~!)

Oh fuck yeah

I REALLY love TomokyxShoma (@komori--shoma ), it wasn't planned at first but it was like they had a click- HAHA, they're just so cute together and they're like one for each other KSBSKDJS 💕

I would like to mention that I highly like Mystic x Tommy too (@mino-diabolik ) but we're working on a it uwu however they will always be best friends jdjsdj 💖

18. What kind of behaviors do you suppose is pretentious to you?

Mmmmm anything unpleasant, hateful or possesive maybe, be nice.

19. What kind of comments do you dislike the most when it comes cp feedbacks of your oc(s)?

Ummm I donno! I've never gotten any but I would be very sad if someone said that their story is bad or boring when I've been doing my best to bring an interesting lore.

20. Have you receive hates about your oc(s) before?

Thankfully no uwu

21. Do you have a complete love story of your cp?

For Kanato x Tomoky: Hmmmmmmmmm not really and I'm not planning on doing one either ksbdksbf

For Shoma x Tomoky: Nothing's set yet haha, I guess that at the moment they used to be good friends and caught feelings, but I'm willing to doing or planning their whole story 💖

22.  Do you allow joint of alternate universe with the canon version of your cp story?

Yeah! Actually Mystic (@mino-diabolik ) is Tomoky's best friend and I was planning to make it part of the 'canon' version of her story dkbsdksj

23. Are you okay with people shipping their oc(s) with yours?

Yeah! As long as we build the relationship with love and smoochies then it's fine kdbskdbs

24. Ever gone through a bad experience in the fandom?

Thankfully no.

25. The ocs that you admire in this fandom are? (Tag them~)

Are you challenging me-

*Deep inhale*

@lured-into-wonderland @mino-diabolik @daughter-of-royalty @komori--shoma @strawberry--bride @bluebird-dolly-bride @smonie @sunny-flower-spot @kurosawa-family @fruit-of-infidelity

Even if we haven't talked or so I admire each of you 🤲💖

and if you're not here it's because there are lots of OCs, but i love everyone!! And i'll support everyone as long as I can, kisses ❤️

26. What is the moment that caused you to feel most disappointed or excited?

Dissapointed: Coming back to Tumblr and realizing I abandoned and missed my friends and their content for almost 2 years 💀

Excited: Bro I get excited every time I get a response to roleplay or so ksbsidjs so many things make me excited

27. The scariest era that you have come across in the fandom?

This one- Right now- I'm trying my best to deliver quality content to the people that follow me and look after me so I always check my writings and posts more than twice

28. The most wonderful thing you have come across in this fandom?

OTHER OC'S-- AND NEW FRIENDS-- AND WONDERFUL PEOPLE-- AND AAAAAAAA

29. Say something towards those that sup port and admire your cp~

I love you all so much and I appreciate you and ya'll can count on me on everything and I'm really thankful ❤️❤️❤️

30. You've worked hard, keep up the goid work! ★★★

Yay! Thank you!

[twst-drabbles]

some fun twst questions for u <3

[i'm sending these to random ppl, feel free to answer if you see this and/or tag/send it to another person!]

would you be a mer, a beastman, a fae, or a human? (or other!)

would you be at rsa or nrc?

what dorm would you belong to?

what character(s) would you be best friends with?

what character(s) would you hate?

what character(s) would you date?

what would floyd’s nickname be for you?

and rook’s?

what twst character(s) are you most like? (personality-wise)

which subject(s) do you think you would excel at?

what club would you join?

how do you think you would survive in twisted wonderland/what would your life be like in general?

[optional!] what would your unique magic be?

Huh, certainly wasn't expecting this. Putting this under the cut cause I ramble.

would you be a mer, a beastman, a fae, or a human? (or other!)

Honestly, I would rather be a human. Sure, it's fun to imagine the reader as something else entirely, but when we're talking about myself, then I'd much rather be born a human. There's something nice about being able to show a beastman, fae or merpeeps up while also being a simple human. There's this implication among the three species where they see themselves as better than humans, so I'd much rather be a human that can beat them in certain things just to humble them.

would you be at rsa or nrc?

Hmmm, honestly, RSA, but I would imagine circumstances would happen where I end up being chosen by the Dark Mirror despite wanting to be at RSA. That, and it would make for a funnier story. Cause, knowing me, I will grit my teeth and tolerate this situation because it's not as if I'm going to an inferior college. I'm just in a college who's Great Seven I have no admiration for. (And who keeps losing to RSA like the losers they are why the FUCK am I here!)

what dorm would you belong to?

Ah, preference wise, I would want to be Ignihyde, but it has come to my attention that I would probably suit Pomefiore of all dorms. Sure sure, I know quite a bit of coding and I do have a high interest in seeing the marriage of technology and magic, but ultimately all my efforts are always focused on enhancing my creative arts. Doesn't help that I have a fuck ton of pride and have no insecurities about my appearance. I'm perfectly at peace with how I look and am content to lay about while building my abilities to write and sing at my own pace. I'm also an literature nut which seems suiting for Pomefiore. I would imagine I'd have the ability to get on Vil's nerves because of how I refuse to follow anyone else's pace but my own.

what character(s) would you be best friends with?

Hmmm realistically wise, I'd probably be best friends with Epel. We both have some restrained anger that needs to be let out, and we both don't come from an affluent background so there's some common ground to explore there. Out of place peeps must stick together. That and a part of me thinks that Epel would not be able to leave me alone when he sees how bad my food habits are(I skip breakfast a lot), so he'd probably share what snacks he manages to get. It be the kind of friendship where we'd rib at each other, cussing at each other without actually hurting one another. I would probably pull from my singing experience and give Epel some pointers when he needs the help. Another part of me wants to say I'd be friends with Leona, but I know what would happen is that we just happen to be in the same space, chilling for hours, not saying anything cause we're too stubborn to move. We'd never talk, we'd never even get each others names, just a weird silent contract to not bother one another while we chill more than 5 feet apart.

what character(s) would you hate?

...Sebek. I'm sorry, the minute he refers to me as "human" in that derogatory tone of his, he is not worth my time. I'd ignore his existence or look at him with disdain. I will never acknowledge him as superior and until he apologizes for all that we will never be friends. Hell, if he insists on bothering me, I'd ruin his poor ears with my cussing language.

what character(s) would you date?

None of them, since I am aroace. Never had a crush, but It's not as if I'm opposed to dating, it's just I never feel the urge for more or to change the regular status quo. So, in that vein, never expect me to have a preference for who I want to date or be the one to ask people out. I just don't get that urge. However if asked who I would be in a queerplatonic relationship with, the person with the highest chances of that would be Epel. Or, shockingly, Vil. I feel there will come a time where Vil and I come to an understanding since, to a certain extent, we do hold ourselves to a high standard that almost ruins us. But also because I'm a person that has no interest in celebrity culture with a forever chill aura, Vil would eventually adopt some of those habits.

what would floyd’s nickname be for you?

Mmmm honestly, I would think Floyd would call me Cobia, since those fishes are usually pretty good alone, but can be seen tagging behind other predators. And as that would imply, I do have moments where I just want to be by myself, tuning out the world with my earbuds, but the minute I make friends with a big scary bud, you will see me tagging along with them, when I do see them that is. Remora would be another good candidate for a nickname but I don't tend to stick to people like glue so that's out the window. I don't exactly stand out so I'm fine being by myself.

and rook’s?

Knowing Rook, he would catch me singing while I was in my room. I'm not exactly quiet, and with my preference for choral, opera, and other songs with high and low notes, he'd probably call me Monsieur Chanteur and would proceed to bother me to sing more with an audience to watch. Nope buddy, not happening.

what twst character(s) are you most like? (personality-wise)

I would have to say Leona, though I take my grades pretty seriously, even though I will leave studying to the last minute cause I want nothing more than to continue sleeping. Along with the whole thing about people remarking about how we're wasting out potential because we're not working 24/7. Though, I am remarkably easier to get along with since I do try to make a good first impression when I can. But yeah, we're very much the "my pace" kind of people.

which subject(s) do you think you would excel at?

Anything having to do with literature analysis. English has always been my best subject. History would probably be my worst subject, though it would still be passing, around the high 80%. I can't stand failing grades.

what club would you join?

None. I kid I kid, in order to get teachers off my back, I'd probably join the writing club, if there is one. If not, then I'd probably join the choir club, as that's familiar as well. If both clubs exist, I would imagine I would end up joining both at Rook's or Vil's insistence. I only give in because I genuinely like singing so I don't see it as extra work.

how do you think you would survive in twisted wonderland/what would your life be like in general?

Really depends if I have magic or not. If not, I would constantly be covered in bruises cause some dumb fucks decided I make for an easy target, if I have magic, then I'd be another unremarkable note in NRC's history. If, only a bit disappointing because I didn't want to invest in a magic career, just wanted to be a writer. I know it sounds arrogant but I would probably be born with a whole lot of magic potential, so there would be this expectation that I should be in a field that uses it, but then I turned around and decided to invest in my writing skills instead. So while people aren't saying they're disappointed in me choosing this path, you can feel the disappointment for not realizing that potential. I was always treated as the golden child after all, so I know what's that like.

[optional!] what would your unique magic be?

It would probably be another case where I have discovered my unique magic early. It'd probably be a unique magic where I can make an environment or character appear off the pages I just wrote and manipulate them at will. Probably call it "Words Off The Page." Though anytime I use it, the page or sentences I used will be destroyed, including copies. Which would deter me from using it at all.

[hoshiyoshis]

Hey, its gonna be okay. There are lots of moments in life where our pasions just arent as intense as before or even disapear for a little while, but that doesnt mean you should feel bad/angered with your self over it. Try to give this a breake, focus on other things even if it is only a week or two, because the more you drawn onto this feeling the harder its gonna be on you.

Also, you dont need to apologise to people for following you, you are doing you best🌸💖

ive kinda left this one in my inbox all day bc i dont know what to really say to it, ig? like. obviously i want to start with the fact that i appreciate u took time out of ur day to say something nice to someone whos struggling bc it genuinely means a lot to me that u did that!!

idk take some ramblings of a struggling artist or w/e u wanna call me. 'depressed bitch' also works lmao

i guess i just... always feel like i'm not doing enough as a creator. like as a fan idc abt making content, but i like making things. i think just... stuff comes back around like darl+ing did, or like HOT did, and i just kinda watch everyone else make pretty much every single thing ever and i sit there and im like... well, what do i do? what can i do? everyone's always going to make things better than me to begin with.

it's not like drawing or writing where i'm the only person who can create a thing that way. its taking the exact same content as other people do and just... doing it, but always doing it worse because other people have done this enough times that it looks easy to them even though i know its not. some people probably have their stuff automated so that they can churn content out quickly.

i guess i'll always feel like... not good enough. and i think that's always where my passion dies out. and if i'm honest, i think i notice it the most in caratblr out of anything else. it always feels weirdly competitive. gif the mv first. make your sets for the new gose episode and get them posted as fast as you can but also make them look good. there's a new fancam? there will be gifsets already uploaded before you even view the first few seconds of it.

and it's not that i would ever ask another creator to slow down because if they're genuinely enjoying making their content then go for it? have fun? i just wish people consumed content better. if you aren't a "big name" then you aren't going to get notes. sometimes it feels like if you aren't a part of closed network that you aren't going to get anything either. or maybe people just... don't want to reblog things.

i don't know. i just notice it the most in caratblr compared to the other groups i made gifs for. i think that's honestly why i really prefer making content for groups like treasure or golcha? its just... more comfortable. i don't feel like i'm constantly competing with other people to produce something for them.

i make a gifset of hyunsuk and i feel at home with getting reblogs from my mutuals and seeing people be nice in the notes. i make that skz + red set and i see some ppl being super nice and calling it pretty/stunning or pointing out the way felix looks in one of the gifs.

which isnt to say caratblr isnt nice. i think abt the sweet tags i get usually from my mutuals, sometimes from ppl outside that circle, too. but idk, i just notice an imbalance more of reblogs to likes more often there. i compare myself to other creators who get hundreds of notes which is probably my own damn fault for comparing so much.

and i think that just... genuinely impacts my enjoyment of things. sometimes im like "oh maybe it'll be fun to gif the new mv haha" or something and then i remember oh, right, im not talented enough for that. other people are going to do it and do it better every single time so why should i try?

also lmao its just hard to be on tumblr in general when stuff like this happens. logic says "take a break for a few days" but i just... i dont want to. i like being here. i like interacting with my mutuals. i just know i'm going to sit there and feel fucking awful though if i try to scroll through my dash. and if i take a break for too long, then it feels like im falling even further behind. i already have to take a fucking extra semester to finish my schooling, i feel even more pathetic falling behind in a hobby that i actually like.

its stupid. sometimes i feel like i don't deserve to be here and to be a fan if i let so much stupid shit like that bother me. i know i don't have to create content to be a fan, but i just... i like doing it. its just hard to not lose all motivation again and wonder why i even bother being here and listening when i can't give them my all in return.

[2stelle]

JUDD & GRACE RYDER WEEK Day 3 ☼ Favorite Kiss

[janiedean]

I feel bad for all the nice J*nsa shippers who like their ship for whatever reasons (tropes, pretty art, aesthetic appeal, whatever) and know it's not canon but get associated with the misogynistic Dany hating crowd who act like Jon being attracted to Ygritte is J*nsa foreshadowing because red hair (I guess Jon should fuck Edmure Tully too? Omg give me Dark!Jon getting revenge on Catelyn by seducing her brother!) Tell me something. I'm new to the fandom but was J*nsa popular before the show? And I've heard something about the OG J*nsa shippers being alienated by the new shippers who insisted it had to be canon and acted like the series is called, "A song of J*nsa #danysux." I don't find that hard to believe because I know people who are now ashamed of calling themselves J*nsa shippers. Like, at this point, it's not only rival shippers who hate it. Even Gendrya/Braime/Jon stans/etc have started disliking that ship. You know your fandom is a problem when people who have nothing to do with Jnsa have a problem with it.

me: reads this ask

me: iwastheregandalf.gif which I can't find now but

okay anon buckle up because I am sadly well-equipped to answer this ask but before I do lemme tell you dark jon seducing edmure to take revenge on cat is LITERALLY THE BEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD but *clears throat* ALL RIGHT THEN.

disclaimer: as anon says I have no issue with like the shippers mentioned by anon in the beginning and ngl I agree, I have ABSOLUTELY ZERO FUCKING STAKES in the j*nsa vs j*nerys war and the only het jon ship I gaf about is jon/ygritte and we all know where that ended up I just... have been here since 2011/adwd was over and all the fic around was just for the books under secret lj communities and asoiaf qualified for yuletide and I have... seen... things.... and I actually have like uh had... beef... with some people in there and I know things bc ppl who hated those others told me stuff so anyway *sigh* buckle up anon I'mma tell you the story of jon shipwars through the years

in order, the old gods help me here, under the cut bc this is long as fuck

when I got into fandom also given what numbers were on ao3 one ship was popular and it was sansan. no like sansan was lit. the only asoiaf ship on ao3 with more than 200 fics. jb had twenty when i checked first. jc had like around 100-ish because of the show but sansan dwarfed anything. I posted the first jon/ygritte fic on the ao3 tag and the fourth throbb fic and like the others were all reposts from lj kinkmemes. nothing was popular before the show except for sansan when it comes to huge numbers bc grrm doesn't like fic and it was all hush hush until the show made it impossible to control and that ship was the one with a huge enough fanbase it actually had numbers, so like... j*nsa wasn't popular in the way nothing else was popular until it got screentime on the show

now, that stated, j*nsa had a... fair amount of fic for a rareship which was mostly book-based and from og shippers that were there from before the show and liked it for what it was but literally none of them thought it was gonna be canon, like it wasn't huge or anything but it had a small but dedicated fanbase who did their own thing and thought it was fun/liked the idea but that was it

that fandom had their own niche of hcs that they cultivated and shit except that like... at the end of S5/beginning of S6 there was a surge in shipping for... well obvious reasons bc it was obv sansa was getting to the wall and that would have been all nice and good but a) it was the time puritanical shipping was starting to take root and the 'shipping sansa with sandor or tyrion is hella problematic' rhetoric had started to circle coming from sans*ery shippers mostly but I'mma not open that fucking can of worms here, b) while the ending of S5 had more of a theon/sansa spike, the j*nsa stuff started getting big

now here we have to mention my villain origin story ie: j*nsa fandom had this one stan whose name I won't make because honestly it's been years and if she's still around I don't want her to remember I exist who was a bnf, wrote for... the website that created the whole larry/carol thing etc who was really fixed on this thing that j*nsa was actually canon and started writing extremely popular meta about it. now you're gonna ask how do you know, I know because this person once wrote a meta named 'why robb stark is a dick' and I told her that it was really fucking bad meta and she took it so badly she kept on trash talking me on her blog/her podcast (I was apparently the insane robb stark fangirl l m a o good lord) and like that was when some sane ppl who argued with her informed me in pvt that she was basically harping on the CANON thing when they'd have been okay with like... it being crackshipping and that she was basically cultivating a hoarde of followers who were harping on them/the ogs and basically ostracizing them;

I would like to add that this person - before her tumblr got 'accidentally deleted' and remade it therefore deleted most receipts for, er, her so-called meta which included stuff like ned and cat raised sansa as a sexual object and only wanted to sell her like cattle - had at some point started a round robin fic thing where... some of the characters mocked openly said stuff that some of the og fans had said specifically targeting them and people in that side basically went harassing anyone who didn't agree with that specific notion

now never mind that this person basically coined an entire term to describe ppl who liked white guys and excused all their wrongdoings out of my conversation re robb basically lying about everything I said as if I didn't have the receipts and tried to sell shirts with it and it didn't work and like then she got kicked out of her own website because she was telling her commenters disagreeing pretty shitty insults (considering I was called psychotic for disagreeing with her that time I don't doubt it) I think at some point she stepped back from fandom bc idk wtf she's up to these days and I don't want to, but basically at that point the dam was broken and there was a bunch of puritanical shippers harping on anyone who didn't agree with j*nsa is canon endgame stuff

this also includes an incident when those ppl were like... passing themselves as throbb shippers and ended up trying to tell t*hramsay shippers off the theon tag based on moral reasons and I ended up arguing with all of them (and they were all from that crowd) which in turn landed me in contact with other og j*nsa shippers who were like detached from that fandom bc those same people harassed them away as well ssooooo fun

anyway when S6 happened everyone was high on it and whatnot but I wasn't gonna begrudge them that I mean... you shipped it for years, canon is delivering you, good for you, but then j*nerys happened

god j*nerys happened

aaand basically...... I mean personally I was there like are y'all seriously arguing about the best incest jon ship out there but like basically the j*nsa endgame side was like AH JON IS PLAYING DANY SEE IF IT DOESN'T HAPPEN, the j*nerys obv got defensive af and both sides were sort of alternatively shitting on jon/ygritte anyway and depicting any other romantic rship jon could have as abusive™ and during S8 it just got worse and like I tried to stay out of it but basically from what I'm seeing now idk how the j*neryses are doing but on the j*nsa one it's ah jon's gonna play dany anyway and she's going to go insane like in the show so SHOW TRUTHING EVERY OTHER WAY and like again denying that sandor exists or that tyrion exists and like I barely touch my corner (sansan) but I ended up arguing with j*nsa/th*nsa people on twitter who were antis and is2g it was white-hair inducing and I know for sure the sansa/tyrion shippers were harassed to hell and back throughout so FUN

and even if the show didn't go there now since everyone there banked on the jnsa endgame thing and admitting you're wrong is like... not a thing, they still haven't let go of it and attach to that ship any shred of evidence which honestly is grasping at straws half of the time (like... the sansa/alysanne parallels like guys please no) and which is why every other ship is starting to get fed up, attaching canon proof of stuff from other ships onto theirs see that batb argument and jb is platonic but jonsa is not nvm taking all the sansan stuff and throwing it on j*nsa but then denying that sansan has canon evidence (like guys I had to read sansa touching his shoulder when saying gregor wasn't a true knight wasn't meaningful and we were seeing things please) and blah blah blah

this also goes hand in hand with the fixation on like... villanizing dany at all costs and like is2g I have zero investment in dany or her storyline I don't even remember it and I don't particularly care abt her either way and sure af I'm not for j*nerys endgame but like.... some stuff I read is completely excessive esp when fixing on how she's a completely mad tyrant who's gonna have to be put down and like... guys no

(also there's some srs stannis hate in that corner which I honestly don't get why they even care abt stannis but I had to read stuff like ppl don't recognize that dany and stannis are the real villains in this saga and like........ idek)

I think most of the og shippers are gone or don't ship it openly bc they don't want to be attached to the drama but like I also think they're pissing off everyone else bc like... I mean a bunch of them also were down with sansa being paired with other ppl as long as it meant a good ending for her except those ppl were... like everyone but the ppl she has actual contact with in canon which meant that at some point sansa/gendry was a thing and like.... you can imagine why arya/gendry shippers & arya stans were fed up, and there's also this tendency to behave like sansa is the center of the entire saga which like these books is named a song of jon snow basically can we pls make peace with it and personally I've had it with both j*nsa and j*nerys people since they started with that dumbass JON/YGRITTE WAS AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP rhetoric but I'm also fed up with the total ignoring that sandor exists/depicting us as delusional and honestly I also was by proxy fed up from the harassing of the sansa/tyrion shippers soooooooooooo

there were also instances of 'well theon is an acceptable choice other than jon bc he can't threaten her' which... i mean we all know what that meant and I'm not even commenting it bc it's one AM and I have no force to but I don't have to explain why it's not a progressive take now do I

there were also metas about how cousin incest being legal in half of the world means that jondany is a worse incest and j*nsa doesn't count as such and I was basically there like guys please just fucking own up to it but honestly I chose to forgot where I read that and I couldn't find the link if I tried

tldr: no one wants to admit that it's not gonna be endgame which considering the amount of fic they have on ao3 is imvho useless bc they have more content than like.. anything I ship that's not jb or that's actually like canon *cries in joncon/rhaegar but I mean renly/loras is canon and has less fic than them* so idk what's the problem with enjoying that instead of insisting it's gonna be canon when not even the show validated it while show truthing anyway when the only show truthing that can be truthed is the small council made of minorities and possibly jon eventually fucking off with the wildlings but not like that but like most people who thought it wasn't gonna be endgame had left/were made to leave by the time S7 rolled by and at this point since wow isn't out yet everyone is fandom-grasping at straws to find stuff to discourse on and we're here beating dead horses *shrug*

so that's... how it is but I would again like to point out that I don't judge ppl on their shipping, I don't particularly care about this entire feud bc I only ship jon with ppl he's not related to in whichever way and I try to stay out of this mess bc I don't really care to argue with ppl who have already decided to bend canon to whatever they want and will have to realize that it's not what grrm wrote at some point but like I have a very good memory and the above rant is as objective as possible also bc again I don't literally have a stake in that race I just think romantic/endgame j*nsa is not a thing and that ppl should stay in their lane and not harping on other ppl who ship whatever in general but especially when their ship is the most popular thing in fandom in the first place /two cents

[tokugou]

Hi. First: I love your GIFs! They're pleasing to see on my dash (and sometimes gives me niggling ideas for creating GIFs of my own but almost never do it cuz procrastination and my creativity sucks haha 😅)! Please keep creating! <3

Second, genuine question (and out of curiosity): Why do you self reblog your posts often? People can see your posts on their dash, and even on the search thingy. The search thingy doesn't let people see your self-reblogs (just the original post). Even though I've kinda been on and off of Tumblr for years, I don't really get how it works, so I'm a bit confused as to why you and other bloggers self-reblog your/their own posts?

You don't have to answer if you don't want to, though! I'm just genuinely confused and I don't know who/where else to ask/search 😅. Thanks in advance! Have a nice day! <3

I honestly don't know what I did to get dragged into this discourse

Thank you for polite question, I honestly don't know if I can help you a lot and if my answer will explain it as you expect. I also was on and off tumblr for a long time and often, but I can answer it based on my own experience on this becasue it was confusing to me too when I first met with self reblogging.

Long reply under read more so to not trash other people' dash

first of all self promotion isn't a bad thing and i'm staring to think some of people here see it as a crime

compared to old one nowday t/mblr is a mess, lot of people left this site and most of them were content creators (either artists or gifmakers) and back then it seemd more welcoming to editors? People would rb your stuff no matter your popularity becasue hey it is content from my fav series i wanna see more i wanna keep it on my blog and show it to others so there was no need for people to self reblog becasue it circulated around a lot on its own.

new people who join this app are raised on i/stagram t/itter and/or f/book where LIKES means everything, you show your support by liking posts THIS NOT APPLY TO TUMBLR AND NEVER DID [you can check this amazing post about rebloging]. As nice as it is to get likes on your post becasue it is like a pat on a head - it is only a pat, doesn't mean anything on a long run. Reblog = spreading. If people don't spread it we stay unnoticed and we tend to self reblog more.

another thing that changed is: people no longer scroll from top to the last post they saw before going to sleep, cos why would they? You wake up in the morning open app while eating breakfast or drinking coffee and you sroll past ten or twenty post or an equivalent of hour or two of your absence - you dont go deeper cos it would be a waste of time - again, I say USUALLY, some ppl still do this and it is ok either way - which leads us to main point of self/reblog:

DIFFERENCE in TIME ZONE not all of our followers live in the same time-zone, when I post something in my free time it doesn't mean others have it too, most of them are probably sleeping or in working place at that hour. We self reblog so people who were absent (and we think might be interested in - becasue why not? they follow us for a reason right?) can see it when they get back on here. By reblogging ourself multiple times, that puts the post back on the follower’s dash and hopefully gives them a chance to see it.

most of people follow ton of blogs (one of my friend I met here told me they follow over 1k blogs) imagine even half of these blogs posting regulary, a few things per hour, the dash is messy and crowded OUR EDITS TEND TO GET LOST IN IT. Most of people follow a lot of blogs and might miss our posts becaue their dashes are WAY more active than these who follow five or ten blogs.

t/mblr fandoms aren't welcoming to new creators in my experience, to get notes you need to be popular/have lot of followers but you can't have lot of them if your posts aren't spread/seen and so on and so on it go in circle (a lot of ppl also only reblog popular posts and avoid these with litte of notes - don't know why it is like this, maybe they think these posts are suspicious?) so with self reblog we also give some of these fake notes to make a post more appealing, i guess? this one is just speculation.

the search function you mentioned is very rarely used tbh people don't go to search for things daily, they usually only do this when they join new series/ship/etc to check if there is something. People usually stick to what they see on their dashes. AND most importantly this option doesn't work as it should. It is some type of algoritm that promote post that are alive/active - even if your post is relativy new it might not show in search becasue it died quickly (as if it wasn't interacted with for some time). With search option it is 50/50 your thing either show there or not. ALSO REMEMBER search option is a terrible promoted thingy that doesn't show you everything so you better stick to /tagged/ thing you can enter manually while on dash if you are using web t/mblr.

people no longer go straight to specific blogs to check if they missed something, they might do it for their besties (as they call it) but other than that DASH is all people see and focus on, so the more often content creators self/reblog the higher chance followrs will see it.

we are not paid for what we do and it come to everything: edits, gifs, arts, writing, video and META POST we are not paid for it and no matter how many people say notes are just numbers these numbers are our motivational payment, the less you get the less you create because you just don't feel the point of sharing your creations if it is not received well or at all.

when I started posting I used to post new content daily even twice a day, nowdays seeing most of my edits not being well recieved in fandom I lost motivation to the point I was thinking of quiting because it didn’t give me joy anymore and I'm still considering it.

I personally never felt bothered seeing self rebbloged post, I follow a bunch of content creators, some of them sr twice a day some each hour, some more or less often. It often helped me to see something I would missed becasue I wasn't here and personally it often give me joy to see the post I remember seeing that had 2 notes when I rb it and now it is 500 or more.

to anyone who read it and still think self reblog is a bother: do not tell people to stop self reblogging. If you genuinely have a problem with self reblogging, just unfollow or block the person who does it and don’t make a fuss over it!

I hope I managed to answer you at least partly? I probably lost the point somewhere between first sentence and second but... well

[tiny-space-robot]

Okay so Fire Emblem anon here!! Here's a Kinda Super Long Bc I Got Carried Away description of a few Fire Emblem games, plus some characters that seem like they hit tropes you like!

The good news is that there's not a super huge overarching timeline, there's several smaller timelines that are seperate from one another except for the crossover games. I'm gonna go with describing the newer ones that you're most likely to be able to get your hands on and play; a lot of people complain that they lean into some anime-tropey stuff and are too easy, but tbh, that's a perk just as often as it isn't. Basically, it's Game of Thrones, but rated T and with more cute girls and old men who are friendly instead of creepy.

Tbh, it's a turn-based strategy game with visual novel elements for characterization, if strategy games aren't your thing and you're just interested in the characters, watching the support conversations on Youtube might be more your thing. All the characterization, none of the resetting the same goshdang level thirty times. Anyways, description of the games in passing, including a brief description of the plot concept, pros and cons, trigger warnings, and some characters you might be interested in if you're just looking up characters.

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Awakening: for the 3DS. Follows Robin, an amnesiac mage, after they're found in a field by a band of knights called the Shepherds. Involves the undead, a twink in a mask, timey-wimey shenangians, and the usual cast of oddballs you'd expect from a Fire Emblem game.

Pros of Awakening: customizable player character, intro of Casual mode (turns off permadeath) and the Pair Up system, which lets you put characters together for shipping reasons strategy and stat boosts. Also doubles as a shipping simulator, since you can pair off characters and meet their later in the game due to said timey-wimey shenangians.

Cons of Awakening: there are some....very concerning combos of names/skin tones/plot relevance for certain characters, so go in with a warning about implicit racism. Also if you like strategy games, this game is relatively easy to break and make "too easy," but tbh that's what Lunatic Mode (the Ultra Unfair Hard Mode) is for.

Trigger warnings across the main plot: underhanded politics, attempted assassinations, martyrdom, an optional character is implied to stalk Robin but idk how to tag that, identity crises, conflicts within a family, character who isn't you looks like you, backstory child abuse, an optional character is a bad portrayal of DID if you squint?

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Fates: is actually a group name for two games set in the same universe, and a DLC bonus story: Birthright, Conquest, and Revelations. All for the 3DS. All three games star Corrin, a pacifist raised in seclusion in the kingdom of Nohr. Each game reflects a different path Corrin can take in navigating the war between the nations of Nohr and Hoshido: Birthright has them stand with Hoshido, Conquest with Nohr, and Revelations has them strike out (nearly) alone. Each path has a completely different storyline, cast of characters, and difficulty curve.

Pros of Fates: honestly, the characters here cater the most to the avid pro-shipper and multi-shipper. I just love this cast. Both Nohr and Hoshido have four members of the royal family you can play and get to know, each of those royal family members has two retainers who are various levels of dedicated and/or unhinged, and the cast just widens and widens. Also a character customization and shipping simulator point for the same reasons Awakening gets it. Also, canon fujoshi rights (there's a character with a skill called Daydream, which boosts her stats when two male characters are paired up near her. one of us, one of us). Also the first game with canon queer characters: both Rhajat and Niles are bi.

Cons of Fates: unfortunately, the writing is kinda rushed or badly translated in some places. Also *shakes IntSys* my lore! Give me more lore! Also, iirc, you could get both physical games in a bundle for a discount when they came out, but not anymore, so it's sorta like Pokemon with version exclusives. Which is less fun, since you can't directly trade characters. Also the fandom for this game is RIFE with discourse, which is kinda sad bc I just wanna talk my ships with ppl sjxhdjdn

Trigger warnings for Fates: child abuse might as well be Nohr's middle name, in-universe racism (since Hoshido is p obviously Japan-inspired, and a lot of Nohrians are rancid to Hoshidans), kidnapping, on-screen murder, lots of fighting your loved ones (on both main routes, you gotta fight the playable characters from the other side AAA), su-c-de, death of sibling(s) in certain routes, demonic-like possession, there's like six characters people can read as bad mental illness rep, Niles especially is discourse bait for being a kinky (yes that's canon) bi man of color but also he's awesome so die mad antis

*break for space*

Shadows of Valentia: for the 3DS. A remake of Gaiden, the second game in the series. Follows Alm, a farm boy from a small village in Zofia, and Celica, his childhood best friend. Zofia and the nation to its north, Rigel, are two nations ruled by the dragon gods Mila and Duma, respectively. Normally, they're in equilibrium, but Rigel is invading and Mila is missing, prompting Alm and Celica to independently investigate the problem.

Pros of SoV: the most like the old-school Fire Emblem games, but it also has the permadeath-off mode. also the first to be fully voice acted! The art style is gorgeous, and the plot was polished up from the old game--two characters names Berkut and Rinea were added, and they are PEAK OTP the diskhorse can die mad. Also the cast is pretty fun all around, from buddy squad and the older brother/dad figure they adopted along the way to "hello this is my gang of childhood friends, we're gonna kill a god" Also introduces Mila's Turnwheel, which lets you rewind your moves if you realize you goofed big time and screwed yourself over.

Cons of SoV: has the most references to other games, but you won't, like, be lost if you don't get them. You just might have a few interludes of "who tf is Camus/the White Wing Brigade/etc" but it's easy enough to look up on the wiki. Also tbh, the plot kinda drags in the middle, there's some filler battles to try and make it feel more realistic and it feels...weird. Also no custom character, you are Alm and Celica and you will Like It.

Trigger warnings for SoV: you know that thing where a girl character gets killed off for a guy character to angst over? the game starts with a fakeout version of that. also a character slowly goes mad over the course of the plot (but it's really well done imo?), there's some self-sacrifice stuff in there, classism is a major theme, possession/selling your soul™, there's a couple of levels where you're exploring tombs/prisons, I'm sure there's something else but I'm forgetting right now

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Three Houses: on the Switch. The newest game in the series, and the most polished imo? Stars Byleth, a wandering mercenary turned teacher at the Officer's Academy. The Academy, housed in Garreg Mach Monastery, teaches youths from across the land of Fodlan how to be warriors, commanders, and knights. Students are sorted into three houses based on their country of origin: the Black Eagles are from ghe Adrestian Empire, led by the heiress-apparent Edelgard; the Blue Lions are from the kingdom of Faerghus, led by prince Dimitri; and the Golden Deer are from the Leicester Alliance, led by Claude, grandson of the Duke. You choose one of these houses to lead, and then everything quickly goes sour.

Pros of Three Houses: It's such a rich experience! The music is incredible, there's so much lore, and you can wander around the Monastery and hang out with the students to your heart's content. Also, it's four storylines for the price of one, even if they're all relatively similar in the first half. It does a pretty solid job of weaving together its themes into a satisfying narrative that will make you consider everyone involved. Also we got our first bi main lord (Edelgard) and non-white main lord (Claude is mixed race) in one fell swoop! Also, given the setting, it's teacher/student ship heaven.

Cons of Three Houses: just gonna come right out and say it: one of the villainous factions in the game is pretty substantially tied up with some anti-semitic tropes. There's no way to ignore it, it's just bleh, and I'm not gonna send anyone in without that warning. Also, though there's some characters you can persuade to switch sides, or spare, there's no route where there's a happy ending for everyone. Also there are so many people who are fake deep about the themes of the game, so be ready for the worst takes imaginable about your faves. also super trigger heavy, see below.

Trigger warnings: MANY. Garreg Mach and the Church of Seiros are very reminiscent of catholic religious stuff, for anyone with religion triggers, blood in cutscenes, death of a parent, death of a sibling (different characters), major gaslighting vibes in some places, lots of people going unhinged, some white savior™ vibes in places, body horror, creepy ass weaponry, backstory genoc-de (mostly not related to the anti-semitism), blood magic (definitely related to the anti-semitism), in general it goes to a lot more effort than the other games to make you think about what's Actually going on, even if it doesn't always work.

*break for legibility*

As for characters you'd like, if you just want to look some characters up, my recommendations based on what I understand about you include:

Awakening: Libra fits 'gnc man of the cloth' so well it's actually a conversation in game: "so what's a woman of the cloth doing here?" "...man, sir, man of the cloth." And Then He Never Gets Misgendered Again. Also Nowi's supports sometimes feel like a jab at antis-- she's a manakete, a person who can transform into a dragon. Manaketes also grow really slowly, as in "middle aged looking manaketes are like 1000 years old," so she's got major baby face and copes with being mistaken for a teenager by making jokes. Also Gregor, who she first appears with, is pretty fun--older mercenary with a thick accent who is like 80% here for a good time. Also Walhart, who's a villain but got some content added as DLC.

Fates: any interactions between Corrin, Leo, and/or Camilla are probably right up your alley--Camilla is obsessively protective over her siblings in a way that's Very Definitely Platonic™, and Leo also canonically has a crush on her in something that was cut in the English release. Also Gunther--once upon a time he was your classic knight in shining armor, now he's semi-retired, Corrin's personal guard, and covered in scars (and his voice is gorgeous too)

Echoes: my biased answer is to listen to every single line Ian Sinclair read for Berkut because he absolutely did NOT have to go that hard. My actual answer is to point you in the direction of the pegasus sisters Catria, Palla and Est, or maybe the older gentleman who's the head of the Priory, I forgot his name oops abbdbd. Also Clive is a devoted husband to one Mathilda, who looks just like an older version of his sister Clair 🤔

Three Houses: knowing you, you'd adore Hanneman--an older professor who's extremely passionate about his work, to the point where he tends to forget personal space and such. Also Seteth, like I mentioned before (join me in simping for him and his gorgeous pecs) and like, honestly, I know ppl make jokes about Alois but he's rlly good. Soft, awkward but he doesn't care, dad jokes everywhere. And also Mercedes, both because she's the biggest sweetheart imaginable and everyone should love her, but also bc she is just walking potential for the kinds of stuff you post on this blog. On one hand, she's the oldest student at the Academy and attached at the hip to one of the youngest, Annette (tho people act like they have a way bigger age gap then they actually do) and on the other hand, she has a long-lost half brother she can encounter (who I will not name for HUGE HUGE spoilers reasons) who she spends the rest of her life with in one of her endings. Heck, he has three possible endings total! Total!

Basically I brought the games up bc I'm used to being on the side of the fandom where everyone shoos anything uncomfortable under the rug, but there's so much material here that's being wasted I SWEAR

If you have any other questions I can send another anon? Your call! Thanks for hearing me out I love ur blog :3

OKAY!!! sorry for answering so late, but this ask was pretty much a BOOK (not that I´m complaining though! thank you so much! ;;u;;)

and from what I read here, I THINK if I´m going off on my first fire emblem adventure, I´ll try and pick up three houses if I get the chance! I have read your trigger warnings (thank you so much! ;u;) and I think I can take it! >:3

again though, I am really, really not a fan of anime and the anime artstyle in general (blergh! XP) so I´m not sure how I´ll cope with that in particular, but then again, an artstyle does not make a game! u3u

AND HANNEMAN SOUNDS LIKE A WINNER TO ME!! I looked him up and OOOF!!! he may not have NEARLY as many wrinkles as I´d like him to have, but the facial hair is definitely a step in the right direction! ;3c

NOW YOU GOT ME INTERESTED!! 

LETS GO!!!!!!!!!!!!! (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

[muzzleroars]

Hey, you don't need to apologize to Muraki-Anon. I get that they're sad to see someone doesn't like their fave. But they also can STOP RRADING your post once they see the post is not about singing the man's praises. Changing your tag to 'the councilor' is just going to make people that want to see your bad end akira vs Muraki content struggle to find it. I can't control what you do in the end, but please don't beat yourself up over somone who can't stop reading when they don't like the book.

thank you 🥺 i got this ask and a couple dms from people with the same opinion on this issue, and truthfully it is hard for me to decide what to do in this case because of this problem with tagging. tumblr used to have a system where the first five tags made the post appear in those tags and on the poster’s blog, while the next ten after that were blog-only - this made it easy to organize your blog effectively while also avoid a tag if you were posting hate, criticism, hot takes, or just plain old silly stuff you didn’t care to clog a tag with. because...i’m in the camp that tagging hate is kind of rude - like when i look in a character tag, i don’t want to see hate of that character as i track the tag bc i love them. also, being INCREDIBLY sensitive, i know how bad it feels when you see someone bashing a fav and i don’t want to make anyone feel that way. BUT on the other hand, i again don’t consider my posts to be hate - i just have a different view of maruki, who is a character i genuinely like and enjoy, but who i also view as having deep flaws that other characters should be able to be upset or angry with. like. there is good reason to have friction between him and the thieves, and he’s not an innocent party despite his understandable and even sympathetic motivations. SO i’m sort of stuck on what to do as i don’t want to make anyone feel bad, but also like you said, i want my blog to remain easy to navigate and accessible, which can be troublesome with custom tags. maybe i should just tag anything like that with “maruki crit” too instead of changing the maruki tag, so that people have something to blacklist but it also keeps my posts managed for my blog? really tho, i wish people felt more comfortable just hitting the block button for this kind of thing sdfjhdfg honestly, i’ve blocked several ppl for posting hate or even just personally upsetting content in character tags before, and it’s such an easy way of making myself feel safe and happy again when browsing that tag. i think people don’t want to, like they feel it’s rude or a big deal or even weak (???) to do so, but i don’t mind if someone wants to block me for posting content they dislike or even just disagree with. that’s literally a big reason blocking exists, to curate an experience and feel happy going into your fandom space. but bc of the way i am...asking someone else to do the work feels like imposing sdfjhf SO maybe as a compromise i’ll be tagging with “maruki crit” from now on as i think my posts do fall under that fairly, but it allows me to preserve the character tag to keep my blog tidy

[letmetellyouaboutmyfeels]

so idk if you could tell but ive been shamelessly scrolling through your timeless tags and for me, while i love garcy and think those two go amazingly well together, when its in a canon universe im always simultaneously like, but what about wyatt??? bc he does NOT belong with jess bc that is just a mess of a relationship/is toxic, and to me (lol) its obvi that he loves lucy and garcia so im constantly like hnggg bc i also totally understand why ppl don't like wyatt/garcyatt and im just: *sob* :(

Phew, okay, sorry it took me some time to answer this. But I have nothing else to do at the moment and no motivation for anything so. As always, I am unable to shut the fuck up, so this is all below the cut.

*cackles* I am SO pleased that you love Garcyatt and that you think Lucy and Flynn would be good for Wyatt because, as captain of the ship, I agree (I mean, if anyone else wants to be captain let me know but the position was open so I AM THE CAPTAIN NOW). I also totally understand why people are pissed at Wyatt and don’t like him, either on his own or as part of the shipping equation.

However, while I am and forever will be the leader of this trash poly triangle, I can get behind the idea of Wyatt and Jess, in the sense that if the show had gotten picked up for a third season, I doubt the writers would have been bold enough to go for a poly triangle (as in Sense8) or even the subtext of one (as they did in Leverage), which leaves Wyatt with two options: Lucy and Jess. Lucy and Wyatt on their own I just don’t agree with. I could get behind it I suppose in the beginning but after season two, no way. With Flynn as their third member, yes, I think the three of them balance each other out very well, but just the two of them? Nope.

However, we got some lovely Wyatt/Jess moments, so if the show had chosen to go in that direction, since it’s the natural direction for said show to go given the development of Lucy and Flynn’s relationship and the COWARDS NOT WANTING TO GIVE US A THROUPLE, I would’ve been behind it.

Provided that Wyatt shapes the fuck up, of course.

The thing is, Wyatt was raised by an abusive father, and we learn in the second season (2x06, I believe, or 2x05) that Jess and Wyatt were high school sweethearts. That means that Wyatt’s view of Jess, whether he realizes it or not, is skewed, because when we have a bad influence in our lives (Wyatt’s father) we counterbalance it with a good influence (Jess). But the good influence, since it is a counterbalancing one, isn’t allowed to be truly human. It’s idealized, put on a pedestal. Hence the “my emotional support actor/show/etc” joke from a lot of people, it’s a self-aware extension of that idea and it’s fine if it’s a fictional character or an actor you’ll never meet or even a real person in your life, HOWEVER, Wyatt doesn’t seem to realize that’s what Jess was to him, and so he’s put her on a pedestal and idealized her AND, since she was the only good thing in his life, he’s hugely protective of his relationship with her and terrified she’ll leave him.

All this leads up to an unhealthy relationship dynamic. Furthermore, Wyatt’s only had his dad as an example on how to be a man, and that leads to the same jealous, angry, possessive behavior towards Jess that his father showed towards him. Wyatt may not realize it, since in his mind he’s just protecting his relationship with Jess (the relationship that formed the cornerstone of his personality and sanity to counterbalance his father’s abuse) and since he doesn’t do the same things his father does, so to him, it doesn’t seem like abuse. In respect to his relationships, Wyatt is still five years old. He’s still a child. He’s desperately clinging to the illusion of safety and home that Jess has given him, at the expense of seeing and treating Jess like an actual person.

We see this with Lucy as he starts to transfer all of those feelings over to her at the end of season one/beginning of season two. He has Lucy on a pedestal. Lucy’s actions such as shooting Jesse James, wanting to go on the offense against Rittenhouse, etc, Wyatt can’t even compute those, because they don’t match his idea of Lucy as this delicate perfect flower he must protect.

So, with Jess going over to Rittenhouse but pregnant with his kid, Wyatt has a huge opportunity before him to be a better person. Jess is not going to be easily persuaded to betray Rittenhouse, if only because it would risk her own personal safety (and that of her child). So Wyatt would really have to work to show Jess through his behavior that he is setting aside that toxic behavior. One way, for example, would be to tell her that he wants her back not because she’s his wife, but because she’s a good person who deserves better than Rittenhouse, and that if she doesn’t want a romantic/sexual relationship with him, that’s okay. This would show Jess that Wyatt cares about her as a person and not just as ‘my wife, mine’.

I think that Jess and Wyatt had, at the end of season two, a great chance to really grow and redeem themselves as people together and through one another. That could have ended as them being platonic co-parents, or as reigniting their relationship on healthier terms and falling back in love. I’m good with either, honestly, because for me what matters is that these are two people who have fucked up (Wyatt more than Jess if you ask me since Jess was manipulated and gaslighted from her childhood by a cult) who care about each other (platonically or romantically) who are ready to use that caring for one another to overcome their obstacles and become better people. And I think that’s beautiful.

So, if the show had gone that direction, I would have totally been okay with that. Will I always prefer Garcyatt? Yes. The Flogan interactions are just too delicious, and I love the idea of Lucy and Wyatt being adorable co-captains of the Flynn is Awesome squad. But the idea of seeing a relationship that was loving, that became toxic, redeem itself and become loving again, I really like that.

maybe it’s because Flynn and Jess are the two people I see challenging Wyatt the most and helping him grow the most and ironically I see Jess and Flynn as the most similar in personality, not Jess and Lucy, but who knows, I’ve been rambling for too long, I’ll shut up now

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I signed up for psychological therapy for transgender youth. I was supposes to get 1 2 hour session alone, and it ended up being a group session. I had to leave 20 minutes in cause everyone was one upping each other and it made me feel very uncomfortable, like I didn't have a deep story enough to be there. And my thoughts were confirmed when one of the people said that you have to have dysphoria or hate and now I don't know anything anymore cause yes there's hate, but aparently, I need more?

Honestly, it sounds like an unhealthy group dynamic.  The facilitators (or whoever’s supposed to be kinda watching/running the group -- usually a counsellor, social worker, psychologist, and/or psychiatrist) should have skillfully interjected when the other group members were one-upping each other.  Everyone has the right to feel the way they do, so if someone feels that dysphoria is needed in order to be transgender, then that’s their opinion, sure, but they need only apply it to themselves -- not force it on everyone else.  They certainly don’t have the right to actively invalidate the other group members based on their personal opinion.  

Now, to be clear, I can’t speak for trans people, so I’d seek out plenty of trans folks (from different walks of life) to talk to about this! I have some links to various transgender ppl’s blogs in this gender resources tag! 

Like any societal group, each trans person is going to perceive their identity and their life differently.  So while certain people may consider hatred and dysphoria to be a main part of what makes them trans, other trans people often do not have those feelings, and that doesn’t make them, and you, any less trans -- it doesn’t make you anything less than who you already know yourself to be! 

The facilitator -- again, I’m assuming there was one, as there probably should be, for a group like the one you’re describing -- likely could have prevented the situation from escalating the way it did by stepping in and inviting people to share theirs (and alternate) opinions.  They wouldn’t need to straight-up tell another group member that they’re wrong, but they should have paved the way for people to feel safe in sharing alternate beliefs and experiences of being trans.

Personally, based on what I’ve heard and learned from a wide variety of different trans ppl, my own opinion is that dysphoria is very common, but it’s not required criteria to meet, in order to be the person you are.  I’m not trans, so I'm not gonna say, like, “no, those group members were totally wrong.”  However, I can say for sure that you not feeling even more intense hatred and dysphoria doesn’t make you Less Trans than these other group members. 

And your personal experiences are just as worth talking about and addressing as anyone else’s, regardless of how brutal their stories may come across.  There is no “who has the worst life” competition, in therapy.  You’re all there to heal in some way, and whatever the reason, you deserve to be there.  Plus, it’s good to keep in mind that as soon as One-Upping starts happening in a group setting of any kind, there will always be some ppl who exaggerate their circumstances and current emotions in order to compete.  Some people there might even have been on the same page as you, secretly -- wrt to not wanting to feel like they have no right to be there... some of them may have simply felt too anxious to speak up and/or against the "selected group mentality,” which is often dictated by whoever’s the loudest and angriest, tbh.  D ;

If there is something in your life that is impacting you in a negative way, it’s important to be able to receive help for, no matter what it is! And since it’s a group for transgender youth, and you’re a transgender youth, you belong there just as much as anyone else there.  Everyone is different, and there’s no blueprint for what “counts” as trans, or for who has the “right” to be trans, you know?

It’s understandable to feel dysphoria and hatred if those are the natural emotions that are occurring within a person -- that’s exactly why therapeutic help may be crucial for a lot of these group members.  Maybe their personal journey will be to learn to accept their emotions without drowning in them, or pushing them onto others.  Your personal journey related to gender doesn’t have to look like theirs, though.  Everyone there is going to be struggling with slightly (or vastly) different aspects of their life, and their unique experiences/feelings associated with gender! 

So no, you definitely don’t need to feel worse in order to be who you are -- you don’t need to feel more and more hatred (or dysphoria) in order to be there.  If those aren’t already your true feelings, then there’s no need to force yourself to feel even worse about life and gender, you know? Being pushed into doing something like that could actually set you way back in therapy/progress/healing, and could undermine your personal sense of fulfillment in life! You don’t deserve to be made to suffer even more.

And, as I mentioned above, the reason a lot of these people are in group therapy in the first place is to learn how to work through those intense, brutal emotions and feelings of dysphoria.  Gate-keeping who is and is not “worthy” of being there (of being trans) is not going to help these group members feel better about those things.  It may be their opinion that people need to meet xyz criteria in order to be trans and/or worthy of receiving therapy, and that may not change for them internally -- but they should not be intimidating others into sharing that opinion.  

There’s no “wrong” way to be yourself, Anon! You’re not doing it “wrong.” Be kind and compassionate toward yourself, and understand that your own feelings and beliefs have so much value already, just as they are!

I hope the group dynamic improves and becomes more accepting of a variety of perspectives, instead of just a single, collective (and pseudo-enforced) one.  If that group continues to make you feel bad, then it’s always okay to keep looking around to find a group that is more open, kind, accepting, and welcoming.  I’d also bring this incident up with your individual therapist, if you get a chance to do so.  

Remember that you never have to choose hatred and suffering! Best of wishes, Anon; may lots of joy and support be yours in life~

[kkukkung]

me whenever you don't write a tag: 😱😱😱😱😱 is she okay???

me whenever i do write a tag: is she ok

very chronologically confused personal ask compilation!

✨✨ ur so pretty ✨✨ it's actually gross how much of a crush i'm getting

PLEASTHE this is fake im fake ur fake but i love u thank u sm i feel so weird abt my soul prison ily thank u... hope ur doing well today and every other day... thank u thank u... i don’t know how to take compliments bsjfhgjk but it rly means a lot to me that anons are so kind! u guys actually make me happier ily thank u this is a Mess (tm) of a reply

annie: wha aat i dont talk like that :/ also annie: polychrome carve ur initials onto my asscheeks *diff anon

sdhfgsjk shhh... but i mean... have u seen polychrome’s photos............. u know when fansites r talented at taking photos n u can tell they’re kind of in l*ve w the person they’re taking photos of?? polychrome is one of those fansites

ive had a few close friends that were intjs and we got along really well!!! your guys' foresight (ni) brings out different ideas than what my ne produces so we always have super interesting multidimensional conversations!! like u guys can see details and i see the big picture and when u put it together 👍👍👌👌 also you guys are different but not in a way thats overwhelming?? like its always just a chill friendship where we nerd out and have fun its great!! // same anon

intps like, nvr stop thinking i lov it!! and yeth i get very hyperfixated on small things that i often miss the grand scheme of it all so intps r very good at pointing that out + we rly do complement each other a lot? the best thing is recognising that we’re both like... pretty introverted introverts (???) who need a lot of alone time and that good Space u kno..... .. seksi..... one of my fave partnerships....

we dont hate ur memes ........... u just pick the worst pics................ and adding the chaotic evil nastie kinda made me sad n ruined it for me 

omg lmao i didn’t expect a serious response to my whining shfkjg i’m not actually like..... upset that ppl don’t rb my things lol i’ll b more careful how i tag things in the future bc i get that it can come across as annoying and guilt-trippy. i understand ur point and i’m sry if my content made u uncomfortable!

Who do u think are the best group leaders in kpop?

mmmmm i think hanbin is a very good leader! sunggyu and hyorin too :> i like tough but dorky leaders? ppl who know how to adapt well to every situation, don’t hesitate to point out mistakes/are able to initiate confrontations, and always think of their team!

Three things I associate with you: pastel blue, wonhyuk and k*nks. Bonus: the ":/" thing sfgjklh. I'm Actually Sorry.

gfhsdjkhg i swear i have like... very average k*nks but im glad i’m associated w wonhyuk n pastel blue... my fav colour

wonho, extra tags, furries

FURRIES JFHDSKJ SHUT-

Ever since you drew hyungline’s fursonas that’s all I can think about when I visit your blog. I also associate you with the sparkly heart emoji and bunnies

ik i brought this on myself but... pls know im not actually a f*rry...

Annie sñfkdhgs please do talk as much as you want, 3am or not. You know we love you and we love what you say and talking with you:(( 💕💕💕✨ (i mean you probably don't want to hear this from someone you don't know but i needed to tell you i'm sorry)

none offensive @ me but i rly don’t deserve any of u..................... this is so sweet thank u................. did u kno i lov u and i appreciate u taking the time to send this to me....?? like it rly doesn’t matter whether or not i know u! it’s the intention behind the message that matters and ur intention is very kind.... thank u sm i hope something good happens to u today 💕💕

Annie I saw one of ur tags that said u sometimes consider deleting ur blob and idek how serious U were and obviously u can do whatever u want duh but anyways i wanted to come say that I would miss u sooooo much on my dash like not even ur blob just u urself ur my fave 😭😭I just wanted to let u know!!! 💕💕💕💕

pleasthe when i get messages like this i want to keep them in my inbox nd in my heart forever i love u!!! sometimes i feel kind of ??? stressed abt this blob for no reason like ??? but i feel stressed abt everything it’s in my nature so lmao dw!!! i won’t delete anytime soon! where else would i screm abt mx 24/7 to a listening population!! this is very kind ur very very kind :( i have a lot of Issues (tm) tbh but these msgs rly make me so happy ilysm thank youuuu......... thank you for taking the time to send me smth lovely like it rly !! means a lot to me i’m bad @ expressing that but honestly ty ty ty you are very kind