#i feel so alone now | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

roseofcards90 · 3 months

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I'm sad 😭

#I take an hour long nap and I feel like I missed so many things #I feel so alone now #I'm sorry ahhhh #my posts

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catmask · 11 months

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its true that romance amd friendship will not solve everything but. objectively speaking its very hard to get sad when you can say 'lets go get cake tomorrow okay' and someone will go get cake with you. like there is some good at least. you know

#i think this is why ive been so much more geniunely happy these last few years #like. i will never be going to bed alone. i will always have someone who wants me here #i will always have someone to say 'im sorry im not feeling very well now' and they will be concerned instead of being annoyed #at you as if those feelings are an inconvenience #scratchpost #txt

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bigfatbreak · 2 months

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Birds of a Feather previous / next

#my art #feralnette au #birds of a feather #long tags #sorry I went apeshit in the tags #LETS SAY IT ALL TOGETHER NOW #I - M - A - G - OOOOOOOOO #its fun drawing marinette's back to Alya and having her appear stout and unstoppable and totally logical #and then you see her face and she's like two seconds from completely snapping and is keeping it together by a thread #as a note just because mari feels very certainly abt smth doesnt mean she's right. feelings can be valid and also irrational #in the throes of grief she decided it was better to be alone than to lose someone again so she started pulling away #and lila made pulling away very very very easy to do #shes also vaguely aware she's being unfair in pinning this on alya which is why she started spinning the drain on cockmoth again #legitimately all the shit that's happened to her wouldn't have been so catastrophic if he was never in the picture and she knows it #but the bitterness of her bestie choosing a fantastic liar over her at the worst of times stiiiiiings #alya's personal timing was bad but lila really took advantage of the fact that marinette had been acting off and weird #she basically clocked marinette as being unstable from SOMETHING and made up a lie about her #knowing she wouldn't have the strength to defend herself #between her social life going tachy bc of lila and losing fu in a way that felt like personhood death marinette was really put on the spot #and alya doing her thing of busting in there and assuming her bias is correct was a terrible combo #essentially marinette is highly unstable and alya is just realizing that #busting in and giving her a lecture when she's slightly hysterical and definitely delirious from exhaustion is NOT the way #to show her she's self sabotaging #cuz thats just gonna make her double down on self sabotaging. bc marinette will not accept that she is also a CHIIIIILD

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stuckinapril · 4 months

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megan thee stallion is the perfect example of unbothered energy. nicki has repeatedly vagueposted about her, gone on unhinged rants about her, gone so far as to mention her dead mother (such a classless low blow), threatened her on live, and has now released the tackiest diss track in history. and what has megan done? literally nothing. she straight up ignored her, aside from that one ig story where she posted herself laughing (which was perfect btw). she is the epitome of “i will not dignify that w a response.” i love it.

#btw i was rly into megan before it became trendy now in light of her dropping hiss / the nicki debacle #nicki’s latest music has been ass anyway but it’s sad to see her behaving like this to newer rap girls #the parasocial hate is literally so intense / insane like i can’t imagine hating someone enough to be persistently harassing them like this #nicki’s a celeb so you’d think she’d know a thing or two about how dangerous it is to pit her fans on somebody else like this #unless this is all just a bid to stay relevant which i would not be surprised ab but nicki seems PRESSED.#i guess if i released something like pink friday 2 id also be feeling threatened by a new rap girl w the bars megan has #i just want her to leave my homegirl megan alone. good on megan for ignoring and living her best life. the energy i wanna emulate #i’m not usually one to play into the whole pit women against other women thing but nicki’s recent actions are so inappropriate. wild #btw megan majored in health administration in uni?? which is a major factor as to why i’m obsessed w her. anyway #text

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pommegrantaire · 8 months

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well, heaven knows

that without you is how i disappear

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favroitecrime · 8 months

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Palestinian freedom fighters breaking out of Gaza and reclaiming their occupied territories. They’ve taken over israeli tanks and have chased out the settlers that were on that land. They’ve launched rockets everywhere and the iron dome has failed to intercept. This is about to mark a momentous event in history.

From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.

#free palestine #it feels so surreal and so shocking #there’s so much hope but so much fear #you just know they’re about to retaliate with the genocide they’ve been planning for years now #i fear for my palestinian brothers and sisters but this is so fucking huge #they tore down part of the barbed wire fence!!!! the people of Gaza are breaking out!!!!#god there’s so much more on twitter but i beg if you look do NOT look at non-palestinian sources #they’re twisting the narrative as if this isn’t retaliation for 76 years of torture #as if the israeli forces and settlers didn’t kill 4 palestinians yesterday alone #as if they haven’t killed nearly 300 palestinians this year alone #do NOT let the media trick you into thinking anything after will be a retaliation to an attack Palestine started #PALESTINE is the one retaliating #also if you’re gonna come in here with both sides or whatever sincerely block me and lmk so i can blokc you #they’ve already out out statements to leave children and the elderly alone so any middle aged fuckers are free to kill :)#which is fine since they’ve likely killed hundreds if not thousands of their friends and family and neighbors anyway #tag: important #fuck israel #gaza #tag: october 7 2023

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tea-cat-arts · 5 days

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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will

#svsss #scum villian self saving system #shen qingqiu #shen yuan #the fact that people think scum villain #-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me #especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater #heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series #he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters #(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters #like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx #I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes #side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me #i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation #but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years #like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain #the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too #+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu #as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people #another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does #also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be #he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students #and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing #+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this #but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy

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gascreates · 6 months

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emotional support frog

who will absolutely eat your hand.

#THIS FROG is a main character now #i dont make the rules #actually i do and you have to follow them #and the new rule is zuko has a badger frog and he doesn’t know what to do with it #he does not WANT the frog #it just wont leave him alone #he did not expect one of his first questions upon joining the gaang to be 'whats your pet policy'#also momo wants the frog now and it is unclear if his intentions are good #so zuko's playing it safe #abd unfortunately looking overprotective of his frog in the process #atla #zuko #also feel free to bug me for individual files #i can add em under the cut #when im not feeling lazy

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reimeichan · 3 months

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Signs of having DID that I ignored (note that these are not exclusively signs of DID but they were for me):

I don't have amnesia, that's just short term memory loss because I have ADHD!

I actually have a very good memory, I'm great at memorizing things (what do you mean that's not the same thing)

sure it may seem like my mood changes drastically but I've read online that's common in people with ADHD! it's hard for us to regulate our emotions!

so what if I have different preferences from time to time? that's normal right? like when your mood changes you may prefer different foods? what do you mean that's not the same as going from "I hate spicy foods" one day to "omg I LOVE spicy foods!" the next?

yeah okay I tend to space out in the middle of conversations then come back to and need you to remind me what you said for the past 10 seconds or so. that's just my ADHD inattentiveness. what do you mean that I only do this when stressed. what do you mean that's a form of dissociation.

speaking of dissociation, sure sometimes I feel like I'm watching myself say and do things without my own input but that's just because I was tired/stressed out

yeah sometimes I go on autopilot. my autopilot seems to have its own agenda sometimes though. weird.

sure I changed usernames a *few* times but isn't that pretty common? yeah I also wanted to change how I presented online and also my pronouns and stuff but again isn't it common for people to want to start over sometimes?

*making multiple accounts to play the same game because I play the game differently on different accounts and don't want to mess things up on one account*

oh yes, I'm genderfluid! I say that because my gender absolutely changes from moment to moment and sure it seems kinda tied to other aspects of myself like color preferences and energy levels and personality traits but I'm pretty sure that's just par for the course with genderfluidity?

"you're so different when you're around your parents vs when you're at school/work vs when you're hanging out with friends!" yeah that's called being a complex person we all have different masks we wear in different social situations and I'm no different even if it seems more extreme for me

"how was school/work/the hang-out/going to visit your parents?" I don't know I'm tired and have a giant headache and can't remember

"you said this to me the other day and it made me feel <x>" what????? I literally have no memory of this and that's so incredibly out of character for me wtf I would never do that I was probably just really stressed out and tired and had no filter on.

#did #dissociative identity disorder #actually did #actuallydid #did osdd #osddid #cdd #there's like. so much more but I have therapy right now and honestly this is a pretty good list #by green #by gray #by purple #putting this here in case other people may see this and relate and not feel as alone in their own journeys #we're going through a denial spike rn so it was helpful for us to write some of this stuff down

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artharakka · 4 months

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Beautiful, But Broken

#bg3 #tiefling #tw blood #c: Viivi #so I redid my bg3 character because I wasn't feeling durge that much. So now my sibling does durge and I regular tav Viivi #(changed her to tiefling for funs)#at least I meant to do regular tav but uhhhhh things have gone very unfortunately very fast #anyway. Viivi is an artist; she does painting sculpting poetry and some prose. Experimenting with this and that #unfortunately she is deaf which made making connections a bit hard in the fine arts world #fortunately she has a patreon with one very generous patron (she's fey warlock)✨ who has bestowed some gifts of charms for her #which have opened doors of many art galleries #She's not a fighter so although she is confident in her own lane she is also very aware of her mortality #so she avoided any fights she could #which might have saved her but also got her into the mess of her lifetime #you see she couldn't fight the entire goblin camp and their leaders. She would've just not survived that. So she convinced them #that she is a True Soul. She is good at convincing people. It worked. They thought she is on their side. Good #Halsin also though Viivi was on their side. Halsin attacked Viivi's party. Now Halsin is dead.#So Viivi and her group were still alone deep within enemy fort. Viivi made new plans. She frees the prisoner who says he will warn the grov #Good thinks Viivi now they know to flee. I will go to Minthara and tell we got the information from prisoner of the grove location #she will trust us and we walk off #when we get back to grove they have not fled and Minthara is at the gates #Minthara wants Viivi to sound the horn. Zevlor wants Viivi to sound the horn. Viivi asks Zevlor to please tell this plan in detail.#Zevlor says just blow the horn already. Viivi does that. Minthara thanks Viivi for leaving the gate open as planned #Zevlor does not thank Viivi for that. Viivi is confused as she did not leave the gate open. (for real the damn gate was left open)#So I did a Massacre.#now Karlach is gone Wyll is dead. Lae'zel is also dead #but apparently Minthara is ready to be very loving and sincere with Viivi. The most helpful person she has met in very long time.#Viivi might love her #so that is how she's doing.

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smash-chu · 4 months

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Long distance loneliness

#my art #doodles #smash-chu's art #not having the luxury of being able to just drive and see someone i know and love #having all my human connection come from digital screens when not visiting my family once or twice a year #it makes your heart sink down into a place that is hard to get out of #a place of acceptance that i will just have to live with being lonely #i love my friends #i just wish they weren't so spread out away from me #in a way i was left back here cause i was the only one that didn't move back to their parents #and now i struggle alone being comforted via keeping in touch online #but it can never replace seeing face to face #getting to be right there next to someone #touch starved is a understatement #but for now that is just how it has to be #anyways #my period is frying my brain making every feeling feel more intense so i feel super fucking alone right now #it's fine it'll go back to being numb soon enough #but sometimes you just need to let stuff out

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koiifsh · 3 months

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i found a hatching brush finally yaaaaayyy also i turn 15 tomorrow

#digital art #ibispaint #fanart #genshin impact #genshin venti #venti #i constantly worry about not being “good enough” for my age #especially as i get older #now that im 15 i feel like i should've reached all the art goals i previously made #like being better at backgrounds #which you can see i attempted here #im pretty sure this is a universal experience so at least im not alone #sorry for the rant #but i know if i saw an artist that i liked voice their thoughts on this i might have felt better about it myself #so i hope this helps one of u #sending good vibes and peace and love mwaaahhh

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chernayawidow · 2 years

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When the person you usually go to about all of your creative ideas isn’t interested anymore, so now you have nobody to excitedly explain your ideas to and so now you’re just no longer excited about them.

Me, that’s me right now. My friend doesn’t wanna hear it anymore 😞

#so yeah I’m sad now #ever since she got her boyfriend she never wants to talk about fanfics or anything anymore #it’s like she thinks she’s too good for it now or something #like bruh #i feel so alone now #like it feels so shitty bc I was so excited to show her this moodboard I made for a fanfic idea #and she just didn’t care 😕#anywayyyy #ain’t nobody gonna read these but that’s fine ig

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spicyet · 4 months

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