#i finished this a couple weeks ago but never posted oops

[arevixie]

⭐️〜(˃̵ᴗ˂̵๑)

[simplemente-myself]

Good Omens Manifesto - 1

(this was written on 11/08/2023)

I watched the first season of Good Omens in 2020 when I had just arrived in the UK and my English skills were very limited, I hadn't heard about the book, and I did not know David Tennant (Shame on me! I know) and barely knew Michael Sheen from his role in Passengers only (Oops!). I think that I read a blog recommending this show for English learners, and then I read the synopsis and went for it. I quickly engaged with that magic and a bit absurd world of Angels and Demons, the end of the world story, and of course the captivating performance of both main characters. As a Christian and former well-committed Catholic (Am I still a Catholic? I don't know anymore) the show challenged my vision of God's ineffability and Their role in the fate of humanity many times. The thing is that I loved the show, I laughed loudly so many times with every episode and I enjoyed that hypnotic chemistry between Crowley and Aziraphale. I loved the whole first season and simply adored the finale: Cheers to the World! I must recognise that with a happy heart and relaxed mind after watching such as heart-lifting show I did not follow much of the news about the show because I never thought that I would be blessed with a second season. When I heard that the second season was coming, I became very excited about having the opportunity to witness again this marvellous universe of love, craziness, shadows, and colours. As I always do, I didn't read anything about the plot for this second season basically because I can't stand any spoilers and a week ago, I put myself on the task of watching season 2. Oh my God! Despite being very busy with my studies I finished the season in just a couple of days. I was enjoying it so much, laughing a lot, watching with a big smile on my face all those minisodes (5 stars to the Zombies!) that showed more about the Angel and the Demon's long-lasting relationship throughout history, and again it found me thinking about God, Heaven, Hell, and we simple mortals. I was so goddamn fooled by the disappearance of the Archangel f**** Gabriel, the love story between Nina and Maggie, and its parallel between Aziraphale and Crowley that I never expected such a punch in my stomach, heart, and soul that gave me the last minutes of the final episode. It felt like a bucket of cold water on my feelings! I was sceptical about what I had just seen and waited until the last minute – even when the credits and the melancholic music were already in front of me - that Aziraphale would leave that lift and the awful Metatron to come back to Earth. But it didn't happen... So, here I am, I watched again season 1 and loved it even more, probably because now my English is better and also because now, I see Tennant and Sheen as two beloved and incredibly talented actors. I am a huge fan of those performances that move your guts - such as Sarah Lancashire's in the amazing Happy Valley - and for me, the core of this season was how Michael and David delivered the millennia-lasting relationship between these two celestial entities and made everyone who watched Good Omens to believe in true unconditional love and cheering for them to be together for other 6,000 years and more. I'm amazed at David Tennant's ability of showing Crowley's hidden emotions even when he is wearing dark glasses and Michael Sheen’s grace in showing an overload of innocence that doesn’t match his long-lived existence.

(it continues in the next post)

[bexalex]

INTRO.

oops i'm already late but a quick intro while i have a chance!! hi everyone this is laur (@bejinyoung) again attempting a second muse because this dude spawned in my head a couple weeks ago and won't leave me alone!!!!

to be honest i haven't finished his bio yet so i'll put a quick tl;dr under the cut with the highlights and hopefully i can get some plots rockin' and rollin' with alex!

ps. this is a new blog so i'm stuck with the new post editor. please pray 4 me.

the history!

mom's a particularly cutthroat lawyer and dad is a former major league baseball player who was more or less babytrapped by mom while she was visiting her extended family in korea. due to conservative beliefs and values, he married her anyway and moved to canada with her to raise the baby (it's a girl!).

alex was also born in toronto, ontario (canada) and was more or less an accident. his mom really didn't want a second child, especially not one FOURTEEN years after her first, but due to conservative beliefs and values (there is a pattern here) she kept the baby (alex) anyway. that said, she was not a very affectionate mother. his dad, on the other hand, was fairly doting but not always present.

alex kinda grew up a little too independent. his sister didn't want much to do with him (what high schooler wants to deal with an infant anyway?), his dad was always busy, and his mom was distant at best, cold at worst.

side plot: alex at some point realized that he looked nothing like his father. and also not that much like his mother. while he's never dared to ask, he assumes he's the product of an affair. he can tell that there's no love left in his parents' marriage one way or the other, but they stay together due to conservative beliefs and values.

CW INJURY // like his dad, alex had a keen interest in baseball from a young age! he started out in little league and was quite the little talent. he continued to play until 8th grade; he made the junior varsity team (he passed the special test for underclassmen to play with high schoolers) but in an unfortunate accident in practice, he broke his femur. he's now fully healed, but whether it's physical or psychological his leg has never really felt the same. while he can walk and function normally in most of his daily life, it still aches with too much hard activity. the pain was bad enough that he had to give up his baseball career dreams.

while still initially recovering from said injury, alex was quite bored. he's always been competitive so he eventually fell into the wild world of video games. first person shooters in particular appealed to him. and he became quite good at them. this will be important later.

another side plot: his sister is married to @bexabbi's brother. alex was only invited to the wedding because people would ask questions if he wasn't.

somewhere halfway through high school, alex's dad decides he has had enough. he legally splits from his wife (she takes everything) but alex is old enough to tell the judge that he'd rather stay with his dad than his mom. his mother puts up a fight at first, if only just to spite her ex, but eventually she relents and dad gets sole custody. alex and dad move back to south korea a year later and alex finishes his schooling in seoul.

at some point, his prowess at fps games earns him a spot on an overwatch contenders team (the very same as @renxbe) as another dps. i actually don't know too much about games so bear with me here because i have no idea who he mained at the time, we will determine these details later. anyway, through a series of unfortunate events, alex's contract was not re-signed or extended and he ended up leaving overwatch entirely to join a valorant challengers team instead. he's still playing valorant professionally and streams on the side just for fun. his whole team is hoping to win the challengers league and become a franchised team in the Big international competitions <3

his stream content is a lot of valo (again i dont know much so can't tell u who he mains rn) but he also does some other variety content.

anyway these days he's a creative writing major (mostly to spite his mother, who would've dropped dead if any of her kids weren't doctors or lawyers, etc.) and has vague plans to write a novel if streaming fizzles out for him. he doesn't currently have any particular interest in music but i'm hoping to give him some connections to change that!!

a little bit of personality info too:

i kinda consider him the guy asking the question "aren't you tired of being nice? don't you want to go ape shitt" and he is currently tired of playing nice and is going a bit ape shitt

not completely impulsive but definitely doesn't overthink so many things. sexuality in particular. he's not defining himself by any one label and is currently in an experimental stage? he's figuring out what he likes and his preferences at a pretty laidback pace and just kinda enjoying the experience.

sarcastic piece of shit. not exactly loud, but annoying as hell when he does speak up. i don't really know how to describe this vibe but just know that despite having nothing to contribute to any conversation, he was very demanding for my attention and to be brought to life in wannabe. he still has nothing to contribute to the conversation.

he sometimes acts like he doesn't care too much about school but he's academically very intelligent. he pretends he's taking creative writing because it's easy but he's secretly very interested in storytelling in unique ways; he thinks it'd be fun to use what he's learning to create some sort of arg or maybe even write a script for a video game someday? he's not entirely sure yet, he's a bit too unfocused to really commit to any one project. maybe he'll just be a boring novelist someday!

i don't have any particular plots in mind Yet and this post is already so long omg so i might try to get some ideas up in a separate post later! but for now! if anything piques your interest please let me know, leave a like, whatever you're up for and i'm so excited to get to plotting with the boy!

[claudiajcregg]

M, N, S, T , & Y for the fanfic ask game. Please & thank you.

Also, no rush on answering these, we all have busy lives in one way or another. : )

I've been writing this reply for over a week now, I think, but just forgot to finish and post it altogether. Oops. Thank you for asking, Danielle! These were interesting questions to consider, really. I was also stumped by a couple of them. I hope these make sense? They probably don't.

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you’d care to share?

Oh boy, so many. But because some of those are half-baked ideas (most of my starting prompts are one-sentence ideas), here are some fics I am considering posting in 2023. Except for the first one, they're all stories I've written in the last couple of years.

A happy bookend to the haunted by the notion that I have barely started to write, set post-series. (For context, these first two chapters are set during their Christmas dinner in 1999.)

The airport arrival scene! As it stands, the current/most recent version is silly and ridiculous and part of a very sweet Jan 21st, 2007 fic.

CJ writes her first memoir, which was a story I wrote rather quickly almost two years ago (where does time go 😭)

Lots of random, one-line ideas.

N: Is there a fic you wish someone else would write (or finish) for you?

As we've established, I'm not so fond of my writing so... Yeah, sure. There are a few ideas I'd love to see done by others. But then again, someone once reminded me that only you can write the idea that's on your mind the way you want it to. Someone can probably do a better job with it, especially if you're a perfectionist like myself, but it's never going to be exactly what you envisioned or in your voice.

I'm always happy to share my ideas, though. It's always nice to see how different authors approach different ideas because they're never exactly the same. The more stories, the better!

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

Again, so many (and not just because there are a ton of tropes). Mutual pining (with a hint of obliviousness or everyone knows), fake dating, friends to lovers, slow burn, I love it all. And all of them together 🤌🏻

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

None come to mind immediately. I guess incest, bestiality? It would all depend. The media I normally consume doesn't really have any of these things!

Y: A character you want to protect.

My blorbos. Only I can hurt them. (jk.)

[angels-heap]

🛒🥺🎶

Oops. Totally forgot to answer this a couple weeks ago! (Prompts from this post.)

🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

Hm. Besides my overuse of certain transition words and favorite adjectives (I'm working on this, I swear), I know I write a lot of stationary characters having deep, halting conversations in very sparsely described locations. Action scenes and vivid scenery? I do not know them. I am here for that angst and hurt/comfort, and in my head, most of it's happening in that white room with the floating squares from the "future" episode of Spongebob.

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

I don't usually enjoy media where characters work themselves up into a frenzy over a huge, mutual misunderstanding that could easily be averted if they just fucking talked to each other, but I love writing (and reading) stories where an innocuous conversation ends up being super profound because it resolved a previously unrecognized misunderstanding or provided unexpected (and possibly heartbreaking) context for some prior interaction. (See also: The entirety of The Ghost in You, most of my other HL fics, and the third chapter of Keep the Light On that I swear I will finish one day.)

🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

Oh god. As previously discussed, I do listen to music when I write. Some of my choices make obvious logical sense, and some of them are really fucking weird, but they work. I remember writing most of Whispers and Moans to the Jesus and Mary Chain album "Darklands," which also provided the vibes and title for Deep One Perfect Morning. In recent history, I wrote most of Presque Vu to A Quiet Life (Teho Teardo and Blixa Bargeld) (a thematically appropriate soundtrack, sort of, and you get a gold star if you know where I found this song), and then played The Curse (Agnes Obel) on a loop while I finished The Darkness Has Eyes (I don't know, man, but it worked). Also, I did actually listen to Barney's Frank Sinatra album while I polished up the end of The Ghost in You. Don't look at me.

[yarnreader]

Summer Days (7/26/17)

We're a little bit than halfway through summer in the northern hemisphere and I can not be happier about that. Summer has always been my least favorite season, I don't like being warm at all and I hate being outside in the heat. And with living in Florida, we suffer through super high humidity with 90 degrees (F) heat, so it's like an oven. (An oven filled with blood-sucking mosquitoes.) So I stay cooped up indoors with the AC blasting while I job hunt (ugh!), knit, read, spin, and play the Sims 4 while listening or watching podcasts and TV shows to keep me company, while I dream of the cooler Fall weather that is in a couple of months (and a job that supports my hobbies!). I wanted to do a post today that shows some of what I've been up to since the last podcast episode I had recorded. Don't worry, I'll talk more about these on the podcast. But this is for those of you who don't watch the podcast. (How many times can I say podcast in one blog post?) If you watch and/or listen to any knitting podcasts recently or have been on Ravelry, then you might have heard about the Tour de Fleece that had run from July 1st through July 23rd. It is a spinning event that coincides with the Tour de France bike event and the goal is to spin the length of the tour and resting on the rest day of the tour. My goal for TdF was just to spin a little bit each day, I did end up having a couple of rest days because I just forgot the pick up the spindle, but I pretty much met my goal. I'm not quite finished with the braid of fiber yet, but I am close. For my knitting, my projects had gotten a bit of love but today my attention has been on Jordan's Hagrid Sweater. I've been loving the cabling in this project it definitely hits all of my buttons.I also had realized that the errata that I thought I had found wasn't actually errata, I just misread the pattern, oops! I'm really enjoying the way it is working up. Last week, I managed to finally finish my cropped sweater! I also got to wear it while running errands and it was perfect for the over air conditioned DMV and Library. All the details for this sweater can be found on the project page on Ravelry, I did do a modification for this pattern. The pattern is an Andi Satterland pattern, A Cropped Sweater for Winter. It's a free pattern that is great for a beginner garment knitter. I've never knitted one of her patterns before and I defiantly will be knitting more. This was also my first time doing the type of construction for a sweater, it had short rows to shape the shoulders, and it was super easy to do. As I had mentioned above, I made a trip to my local Library last week to pick up the rest of the books in this series. Uglies by Scott Westerfeld is a YA Dystopian novel that I first read years ago, so it has been a while but it was one that I remember that I loved when I was in school, hence the reason why I have the first book in my personal library. It's an easy read for me, so it's going by quickly. The story is set during a time in the future where everything that we have right now is centuries old and is consider artifacts and anyone who looks normal or different is considered an Ugly. When people turn sixteen, they get an operation that turns them "Pretty" and they look like everyone else. I'll talk more about it on the podcast, so if you want to hear more check it out. How is your summer going? Do you have any favorite summer reads and/or projects at the moment? I would love to know in the comments below or in the Ravelry group.

[loverofpiggies]

Hey guys- tumblr is a broken website and deleted this nice long thing I was writing you guys! Of course, of course.

But. I read everyone’s comments on my last post about discontinuing GV, and... I appreciate the support so very much ;0;

I’m always excessively hard on myself about this sort of thing, and it broke my heart too that I just. Can’t seem to get back into the story I loved so much. So, thank you for all your kind words. I read everything with tears in my eyes, I won’t lie.

And I AM doing much better then yesterday, a few of my friends were alarmed and contacted me, and. I didn’t mean to alarm anyone. ): I have a tendency to not realize how horrible I’m feeling for a long time, until I do some weird cryptic post, or message to someone, and just sorta crash. It’s not the best coping mechanism or anything, but I gotta be honest I got no clue how to curb it, since I never realize how bad I’m doing until I need a day to be real miserable and cry. So, oops! Sorry about that.

A related note, but. Part of what lead to that, is after I’ve moved back to New Mexico and have been working on my home, well. Some sad stuff under the cut, if you’re up for reading that.

My mom had a stroke a few weeks ago.

She’s doing better overall, but it was a massive shock to the whole family, especially right before Christmas, which is definitely her favorite holiday. It was heartbreaking to see her stuck in a hospital during that time, and just. See her struggling so much.

I only live 10 minutes away from her rehabilitation, while the rest of the family live almost 40, so I’ve been visiting her the most. I’ve been learning how to help her walk, sit, stand, ect, and I’m leaving in about a half an hour to do another learning session with her. I’ve been trying to be the fun, sunshiny one to help make her happy and laugh, and luckily it’s been working, and I’ve seen her spirits go up! But, it’s hard on me sometimes. Christmas was insanely hard and I ended up in tears, my whole family is struggling and it’s just. Been a real hard couple weeks. ): I am so happy I moved here before this happened though, that way I can be there for her.

And I know I’m not alone with the Covid situation, but 2020 was so hard, and so many hardships have happened since then, things that have completely upturned my whole life. I know I’m not alone in that, and I still have so many things to be grateful for, but. It hasn’t been easy. It’s a big part of why I just, can’t write a story right now. Besides, if I did, the writing would be terrible.

I am eternally grateful for the job I have, that I’m able to visit my mom as she needs, even if running a business solo is a LOT of work. But I’m able to shift things around and see her. I’ve also been delivering her food, since the food they give her isn’t.... well, all that great, and she’s barely hungry right now.

I will say, despite all that, I’m surrounded by incredible friends and family to help me during all of this. Despite feeling like crud, I’m really very happy for everyone and everything I have right now. So, thank you again. ;_;

And, I know I haven’t been active on here like at ALL, but the truth is I’ve been working on something, that mostly keeps all the visuals and everything hush hush. I also don’t want to post anything publicly about it, and then maybe be unable to finish it, so I’m mostly doing this project for me.

A while back I posted some visuals that indicated I was making a video game, and well. I still am! Everything has switched to pixel art, and I’ve reworked the game physics. I have the story set in stone, and I’m really genuinely excited to work on it. But unlike comics, you can’t just. Post a page up and do it slowly, you sorta got to complete the whole thing before putting it out.

I’ve learned how to program a ton of stuff, I just finished learning very basic save points and I’m working on the visuals for a menu, and I’m trying to get all the more frustrating things out of the way so I can focus on the story, and the level design.

This is SUPER SUPER early in development, but. I wanted to give you guys something as a thank you. The playable character’s name is Willow, and the other child is Nina!

So, thanks again for reading if you did, I appreciate it. I hope everyone is doing ok, and if you’re not doing ok, that’s ok too. Love you guys <3

[wordsinhaled]

MAY I ASK do u have an ao3 account or do you even write fanfictions because the dreamling stuff u keep writing has me in a GRIP

hi anon!!! thank you so much for asking! unfortunately i don’t have an ao3

and—depends how you define actually writing fanfiction i guess? i personally consider all my dreamling drabbles and vignettes and things to be bits of fic, and they are on my blog in the #dreamling tag !! i have written multiple parts of the same thing before. and i do have specific tags for a couple of things that are ongoing! if you mean like... Fic That is Actual Words I Strung Together and not just me yelling my vaguely prose-y thoughts into the void... i have a couple of those so far also

on that note, sometimes people tag my posts #notfic, and like, i do see why because it’s not a thing that was proofread and beta’d and whatnot, but also, is it really not fic? i guess i’m not sure!

anyway, tags for things!

#regency epistolary dreamling — my current beloved, regency hob’s unsent letters to dream and (maybe, eventually) dream’s unsent letters to hob. has ART because the lovely @fishfingersandscarves hand-wrote one of hob’s letters!!! soon to have More Art when my stationery supplies come in!!!!

#dreamling bodyguard au — hob dies & dream offers him the choice to come to the dreaming and be his bodyguard

#gentle dom hob — aka dreamling kink negotiation; may eventually have “proper” fic if the mood strikes

fics—

hob tries courting dream <3

if the walls were too thin, you would break right in

in which dream can read hob like a book; he is the prince of stories, after all (alludes to nsfw)

bring all your things and we will build a pyre (nsfw, D/s tones; sequel to the previous)

these bones never rested while living; so how can they stand to languish in repose? (the bodyguard AU)

at the moment, i’m writing... basically, shameless dreamling smut-with-feelings fic? because they just can’t escape their Feelings, even when they pretend not to have them, oops. hoping to finish that today! 👀 at myself

aaand after that i will potentially maybe possibly write (or at least yell incoherently about, and kind of sort of write) the faerie prince!dream dreamling AU that i promised @et-in-arkadia in the middle of the night like two weeks ago

so... yes. i don’t know if this was a decent answer, anon, but i will certainly continue writing and as always everyone is welcome to writhe around on the ground with me about dreamling <3 <3

thank you again!!!!!! i appreciate you!!!

[givemetherapyimawritingtravesty]

some??? jegulus maybe??? 👀👀

regulus had a bad day??? 🖤 starts questioning himself??? james won't let him?????🙈

you're such an amazing writer 👑👑

i love you tons ‼‼

Alright, yes yes and yes. Here is a collection of times Regulus was doubting themself and James made it known that they have no reason to. Just cute couple’s things. Also, I’ve decided I really like nonbinary Regulus, I’m in love with the idea actually (and it’s @fuckboyregulus 's fault but I ain’t mad about it).

Confession: Did I saw I was gonna post this like two weeks ago and then promptly never finish it? Maybe. I'm sorry. The Big Sad hit hard but we're on the upswing now.

Also another confession: this has been sitting in my asks forever, since before I really started writing Jegulus, and I finally decided to do some more since it's been forever and it was gonna be short and sweet and spiraling into like 2k words... oops. But who here is gonna complain? Yeah, I thought not lol <3 I had several ideas for how to write this so I wrote them all, tell me what one was your favorite? :)

Reassurances

1. ~after exam nerves~

Regulus has just gotten out of potions, head down and shoulders slumped, when they caught sight of James on a bench across the still crowded hall.

“Hey. How’d the exam go?”

“Kicked my butt. I’m sure I got half of it wrong. I’m just rubbish at potions.” Regulus sighed.

“Hey, no one’s allowed to do anything to your butt but me. And I’m sure you did fine, you studied non-stop for the last three days.” James smirked. “Or rather, you did stop a few times.”

“Yeah, when you were incessantly distracting.”

“I’m always distracting. Look at me.”

“Oh, I do, don’t you worry. But this exa-”

“Nope. You did great and I will not hear otherwise. You had it all down last night, as long as you didn’t mix up Wartcap powder and Octopus powder again, you’ll be fine.”

“Which one of those was for the Fire Protection Potion?”

“Wartcap.”

“Fuck.”

James chuckled and threw his arm around Regulus’ shoulders, pulling him close. “It’ll be alright. It won’t hurt anything at least; it just won’t work. Now had you added both, it would have made the potion…”

“Stronger?” They looked up at their boyfriend.

“Exactly. It’s a fairly harmless ingredient, just strengthens most potions. See, you know it, just need to not freak out about the exams.”

“But my potion was wrong.” They sulked.

“But if everything else was decent, your grade will be alright. And we’ll really study up for the next one.”

“We?” Regulus asked, smiling up at James.

“Yes. We. I’ll actually help this time, instead of being a distraction.”

“But I thought you were always a distraction?” They smirked.

2. ~pre match jitters~

“I should go, Sirius will be back from dinner soon.” Regulus said into James’ neck, from where the two were cuddled together on James’ bed in Gryffindor Tower.

“No. Stay.”

“I really should head back and get some rest before the quidditch match tomorrow. It’s only against Hufflepuff but if I don’t do well again, Mulciber’s going to bump me back down to reserves.”

“No.” James snuggled impossibly closer, “You’re going to do great. I know you are. Ravenclaw is a tough team, but you’re going to kick butt tomorrow. I know it.”

“But,” they sighed, “What if-”

“Nope. No, I will not hear slander against my partner. Not gonna let it happen.” James protested, holding Regulus tight and placing a kiss in their curls.

They stayed cuddled together for a while, James holding Regulus tight and rubbing reassuring hands up and down their back until they drifted into a light doze.

Sometime later, the other three marauders returned from dinner, rowdy as always, banging the door open.

“Shh!” James shot them a dirty look as the person in his arms grumbled and shifted. James soothed a hand down their back and hugged them close.

“What are they doing here!” Sirius whisper yelled. “They have a perfectly good dorm several floors away from me they could cuddle you in. Gross.” Sirius feigned disgust. But James didn’t miss the smile that pulled at the corner of his lips at seeing his sibling sound asleep in his best friend’s arms.

3. ~rough words from home~

James smiled at Regulus who sat next to him at the Gryffindor table, filling their plate with toast and bacon for breakfast as Regulus poured tea for the both of them.

I was quite early, not many people in the great hall yet, so they ate in comfortable silence, sitting impossibly close, and ankles locked together beneath the table. It wasn’t long before the morning post arrived, and the Black family owl landed in front of Regulus with a angry hoot.

James shot Regulus a worried glance as they untied the note from the owl, who tried to peck their hand before flying off.

“You alright?” James asked them, eying a little spot of blood on their knuckle.

“Yeah, it’s fine, barely hurts.” Regulus said, taking their napkin to clean up the drop of blood.

James eyed them wearily as they reluctantly opened the letter, trying to get a read on Regulus’ expression. They never liked getting letters from home, usually their mother just expressed her disappointment in her “only son” and scolded him to do better. This one seemed to be no different, and James could feel Regulus go tense beside him as he neared the end of the letter.

Regulus folded he letter back up neatly before placing it in his pocket, staring down at his plate, disinterested in finishing it.

James wasn’t sure what was wrong, but didn’t want to overwhelm Regulus with touch, so he jostled their entangles feet and waited for Regulus to process what he wanted to share. If he wanted to share.

“Mother is not happy about my last potions exam.” Was all they offered.

“Forget her. You did so well. Way better than the last one, and you passed with flying colors.” James reassured them.

“I may have improved but not enough.” Regulus’ voice waivered, tears in his eyes. “She said if I- I don’t- she-”

James moved a tentative hand to his back, “Hey, shh, it’s alright. I won’t let her come near you. Okay? Please. Think about what I said, yeah? I’m serious. You never have to go back there again.”

Regulus let out a wet laugh, “You’re not Sirius.” They sniffled, turning into James’ shoulder. “I… I have to go back.”

“No.” James was resolute, wrapping Regulus up in his arms. “You don’t.”

They stayed like that for another minute before Regulus sniffed and pulled away. “Will you help me study again? There’s another exam in a few weeks and if I have any chance of getting a hundred percent, I’ll have to get started now.”

“Of course. I’ll always help you. And you’re going to do great, you know everything, you just don’t explain yourself the best in the essay portion. We just need to work on getting you to slow down and writing out your thought process is all.”

“But I suck with words.” They slumped.

James knocked their shoulders together, “No. You’re great with words, you just get a bit ahead of yourself when you write them down. Now, let’s forget that dreadful letter.” James help out his hand expectantly.

Regulus handed over the parchment and watched at James cast a quiet incendio and turned it to ash.

4. ~late night ramblings~

It was yet another win against Ravenclaw for Gryffindor today and the party in the common room showed no signs of dying down anytime soon, and it was already one in the morning.

Regulus, not one for loud parties or being surrounded by loads if people, had snuck up to James shared dorm room some time ago to curl up in his bed, away from the chaos.

Regulus had been nearly about to drift off when they heard the door creak open behind them and click softly shut before feeling a weight dip the bed and an arm lay softly over their waist, pulling them back into James’ chest. They smiled as James placed a soft kiss to the back of their neck.

“Finally had enough partying for the night?” Regulus teased, sleep slurring their words.

“Was missing you.” James answered back simply.

“Why?” Regulus let slip out.

“What do you mean by that?” James went a bit rigid, holding Regulus tighter, sounding much more serious than his soft flirting had been a moment ago.

“I- I just meant… I don’t know.” Regulus got out through the sleepy haze threatening to take over. “I just don’t know why you’d miss me. Rather be in here than having fun downstairs. I just don’t get why you’d- you’d waste time with me. I’m not worth-”

“Why do you like me? Like spending time with me?” James countered.

“I dunno.” Regulus slurred out. “You’re good. And make m’ feel safe. And caring… no one’s really cared about me like you do.” Regulus clutched James’ arm to this chest.

“You’re good, Reg. You make me feel safe, and good, and I care about you so much.” He squeezed them tighter. “Don’t you ever doubt for a second how much. You’re worth it all, Regulus. Remember that.” He placed another soft kiss on their neck.

Regulus gave a contented hum as they wiggled happily, getting comfy, and James could sense the tension leave their body as sleep pulled them under.

James just snuggled in as close as he could, holding Regulus tight, never intending on letting them go.

5. ~woke up on the wrong side of the bed (James wasn’t there)~

“You’re not good enough for me. Why would you ever think this was going to work out.” James sneered, “You were a mistake. I should never have brought you here.” His hateful words were hitting Regulus like bricks catapulted at his chest. “You aren’t worth saving.”

Regulus awoke with a gasp, bolting upright. They looked around the room frantically through teary eyes. They didn’t recognize where they were as they brought a jumper sleeve up to wipe the tears off their face. Looking down at the jumper, it was soft and in a deep maroon color. This isn’t mine,they thought. Looking around the room, they took in the warm red of the walls, the open window to the left, and the bedroom door open to his right.

Regulus started to panic more, breathing fast, trying to work out what had happened. James had been yelling at them in the dream. Had it been a dream? Sneaking off the train and going home with James and Sirius for the summer had definitely felt like a dream, finally getting away from their parents. But his yelling had felt so real.

Regulus tried to work out what had happened but couldn’t help hyperventilating. They barely heard footsteps pass outside the door just to come back and knock softly. They looked up to see someone rush towards them and envelope them in a hug.

“Shh, it’s alright Reggie. It’s okay.” Came Sirius’ voice.

All Regulus could do was let out a sob, unable to get their arms to move and hug their brother back.

“What’s going on?” Regulus heard a clang as he saw through teary eyes James hastily put down a plate on the floor as he entered the room. “Reg, what’s wrong baby?” He sat down on the bed next to Sirius, going to pull them into his arms.

“You- You hate me.” Regulus sobbed out as Sirius reluctantly let his sibling go to allow James to scooch closer. Sirius kept a hand rubbing up and down Regulus’ back, sticking close by.

“Never, baby. Why would you think that?” He questioned softly.

“You- you said- and then I woke up and you weren’t here, I-” They gasped out.

“No, Reg. It was only a bed dream. Never. Never, I promise.” He held them tighter, starting to understand what must have happened. “I’ve got you, Reg.”

Regulus cried harder for a moment before they quieted, and James help them until their breathing evened out a bit more. “I’m sorry.” They hiccupped, whispering a barely audible, “Please don’t go.”

“Shh. I’d never do a stupid thing like that. Never, baby. I’m right here.”

[crackedoutwalnut]

Sleep (Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader)

Summary: Y/N has been struggling with a case for three days and refuses to sleep until she gains headway. Natasha isn't having any of her crap and forces reader to sleep.

Warnings: Just fluff

Word count: 1,600

A/N: I originally posted this on my ao3 account and decided to post it here as well :)

It had been a week since the terrorist threats had been made on live television and three days since you had been assigned to finding information on the hostile organization known as Anubis. You were S.H.I.E.L.D's youngest and most skilled hacker. They had recruited you just over a year ago when your best friend, Peter Parker, suggested you to Nick Fury. You and Peter had met your freshman year of university; he was a smart young man, if a little goofy. The two of you hit it off immediately, and when he found out how skilled you were with computers, he immediately suggested you join S.H.I.E.L.D.

This seemed to have been a mistake considering you had been up for the better part of 72 hours and still haven't managed to get anything on these assholes. No matter how many times you analyzed the video, nor how many government databases and archives you cross-referenced, there was nothing about Anubis anywhere. The man in the video had been wearing an intricate black mask in the shape of a jackal, the animal symbol for Anubis, the god of death and mummification. You spent an entire evening alone researching Egyptian mythology and how the hell that could tie into a terrorist organization. However, seeing as Anubis has no digital trail or relation to any other hostile organization, your insomnia-addled brain failed to make any connections.

Groaning, you scrubbed at your face and took a sip of your now cold coffee. A total of four coffee cups, two Monsters, and a Redbull now lay empty on your desk. The caffeine did nothing for your exhaustion at this point; however, it was either that or go to sleep. You drained your coffee to the last drop.

Looking down at the bottom of your now empty Avengers mug, you sighed and stood from your desk. Shuffling out of your room, you trudged to the kitchen on the other side of your floor. You readily accepted Natasha's offer to share a floor with you in the tower back when the two of you first started dating. The prices of staying in the fancy university dormitories your school offered were outrageous, even for a S.H.I.E.L.D employee. You two often slept in Natasha's room, despite having a separate bedroom. Your eyes felt like lead at the memories of cuddling up with your girlfriend under a pile of blankets and pillows. Natasha usually did not like sleeping with more than a single blanket finding the heat stifling; however, she usually gave in easily when you pulled her down into the fluffy pile. Rubbing your eye with the side of your fist, you pushed the cozy memories aside and set your mug under the Keurig. Blindly you reached out to grab a coffee pod from a rack to the left of the coffee machine. Your drowsy limbs allowed the pod to slip from your fingers, rolling under the counter.

"Shit," you cursed, crouching down to look for the coffee. After a few moments of clumsily looking for the pod, you finally grasped it and went to stand.

"I've been looking for that shirt," a voice rasped sleepily.

You jumped and whirled around to see Natasha leaning against the kitchen counter. Her shoulder-length red hair was ruffled, and the plain black tank top she wore was askew. You looked down at the Captain America t-shirt that hung down to your bare thighs, "Didn't you steal this shirt from Steve?" you asked with a raised brow.

Natasha shrugged, "He never noticed, so it's mine fair and square."

Turning to face the coffee machine once again, you inserted the coffee pod and pushed the start button. "I'm not sure that's how it works." Natasha chuckled and strode up behind you. She wrapped her arms around your middle, kissing the side of your head. You hummed and leaned back against her, feeling the toned muscles of her stomach and biceps supporting you. She was firm but soft, like an expensive mattress. On lazy days you loved to read with your head resting against her chest. She would idly thread her fingers through your hair and listen to you softly whisper the words on the page. Sighing you, nuzzled the back of your head against the crook of her neck. Your eyes slipped shut as her fingers lightly traced your stomach.

"Where have you been? I have barely seen you these past three days."

"Busy with the Anubis case."

She spun you around lightly and inspected you, her brows furrowed slightly. "You look awful."

You snorted and nudged her, "Thanks, Babe."

She raised a brow, "When was the last time you slept?"

"I took a nap around lunch." You didn't mention that it had only been an hour long for fear of being on the receiving end of the assassin's wrath.

"Y/N..." she warned lightly. "you can't go that long without sleep. It isn't healthy."

You stepped away from her and shrugged, "I'm fine, I just need to clear a few more things up about these assholes, and then I will rest, I promise." You turned around and grabbed the steaming coffee cup. However, Natasha grabbed it from you and set it behind her on the counter. Groaning in protest, you went to reach behind her to grab it. "Nat, come on, I'm fine."

"You look terrible, Y/N," Natasha argued, grabbing your arms gently. "I know you want to prove yourself to Fury and the rest; however, you are of no use to anyone if you are too tired to do your job."

You huffed and looked down at the tiled floor beneath you. She was right, as always. Your mind was foggy and slow, making it hard to do anything productive. A couple of times, you drifted off at your desk. Not that you were going to admit any of that to her, though. "Fine, I will take a nap," you conceded, "But, you have to wake me up at 6. Got it?"

Natasha glanced at the oven clock that read 2:45 before nodding her agreement, "Alright, now let's get you to bed," She wrapped an arm around you and guided you to her room. Inside her sparsely decorated room, she had gathered three extra blankets as if knowing you were going to be joining her. You cursed her for being so persuasive. She laid down under the many blankets and gently pulled you down with her. The moment your body hit the mattress, you felt your body turn leaden. Relief crept through your bones as you leaned into the warm comfort. Natasha wrapped her arms around you and pulled your limp body against her front. You went slack as you felt her soft hands stroke up and down your sides. Your girlfriend pressed a kiss to the base of your neck and hummed contently. A cozy feeling settled in your chest as you let your eyes slip closed.

"One of these days, I'm going to convince you to let me be the big spoon," you joked drowsily.

She snorted and laid another kiss to the top of your head, "In your dreams." You rolled over and burrowed your head under Natasha's chin, her red curls tickling your cheeks. You wrapped an arm around her waist and slung a leg over her own. She chuckled and tightened her grip around you before tucking you more firmly against her. "You're too much of a koala to be a big spoon," she murmured against the top of your head. Her hand crept under your shirt and started tracing imaginary shapes against your back.

You huffed and nuzzled against the column of her neck. "We'll see," you slurred drowsily. Your eyes were now sealed shut with exhaustion and your limbs too heavy to move.

"Shhh, go to sleep," Natasha whispered, squeezing you gently.

"Remember, 6 am..." you trailed off to sleep before finishing the thought.

"We'll see," she murmured.

When you woke up, you found Natasha typing away on her laptop next to you. She wore different clothes than the ones she wore earlier that morning, sweatpants and a red hoodie. You groaned and sat up, rubbing your eyes. "I thought you were going to wake me up?" You questioned, shooting her an accusatory look.

Natasha looked up and smirked, "Oops, my bad. I guess I forgot," she shrugged innocently.

"Natasha, I was serious; I have so much work to do," you complained, moving to get out of bed. Checking the alarm clock on the bedside table, you gasped when it read 3 pm.

Before you could fully slip out from under the blankets, Natasha set her laptop aside and pulled you on top of her. You yelped in surprise as your head fell back onto her lap. "Come on, stay in bed with me. You have three hours until 6 anyways."

You scowled, "That is not the 6 o'clock I was referring to, and you know it."

Natasha grinned and shrugged, "You never specified; how was I supposed to know which one you were talking about?"

"You're an asshole," you complained.

She poked her lip out in mock sympathy and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, "Oh, I know I'm terrible, aren't I? Making sure my girlfriend is well-rested and not overdosing on caffeine, simply awful."

"I'm glad you agree," you muttered, struggling to stand up off her lap.

Natasha wrapped two strong arms around your middle and pulled you further against her, "Come on, three more hours," she moved so that her lips grazed your ear, "I'll make it up to you, I promise."

You melted at her tone and sighed, "Fine, but if you don't wake me up at 6 pm, I swear I'm breaking up with you."

Your girlfriend kissed your cheek and nuzzled against you, "Sure you will."

[cruelangelstheses]

on each other’s team

fandom: fire emblem rating: T characters: hilda/edelgard words: 2.2k additional tags: post-canon, post-crimson flower, comedy, forced to work together, unresolved sexual tension description: after an attempt to parley ends in them being knocked out and captured by slithers, hilda and edelgard must work together to free themselves and defeat their captors. a/n: ok so this was written for the 2021 fe3h femslash exchange on ao3 except i kind of forgot tumblr existed and never posted this on here until now. oops! don’t think too much about the politics/lore of this okay i just needed a reason for them to be tied up together in the dark lmao. title from “team” by lorde

read it on ao3

—

It’s quiet, deathly quiet, and darker than the blackest night. The only sound is Hilda’s breathing and that of the woman whose body is squished against hers.

Finally, Hilda can’t take it anymore. She speaks.

“This is your fault, you know.”

Edelgard—Emperor Edelgard—scoffs and shifts slightly. Her back is up against Hilda’s, and the rope that ties them together constricts against Hilda’s chest. More rope binds her hands and feet, and Edelgard’s are probably the same. Hilda tries not to think about how close they are.

“My fault?” Edelgard says. “You’re the one who couldn’t resist bringing a Heroes’ Relic to a parley.”

Hilda rolls her eyes, not that anyone can see it due to her blindfold. “Fine, fine. Blame me for wanting to be safe. Blame me for being a bit cautious about meeting with the emperor I fought in battle against not six months ago. Pretty sure they came here for you, Princess, not my stupid weapon. Of course they’d take advantage of the fact that the Emperor herself was going to be here.”

Edelgard sighs. “I didn’t want to send an envoy because I thought you would trust me more if we spoke in person. And I didn’t want to bring a whole squadron of bodyguards with me for the same reason, as well as so they wouldn’t give away my location. But clearly someone found it regardless.”

It’s only been a couple months since the war ended with the Empire’s victory. About two weeks ago, Hilda received a letter from Edelgard herself asking to meet at Gronder Field, about halfway between Enbarr and Goneril territory. It’s a bit further to travel on Edelgard’s end, but Hilda supposes she wanted to show that she was dedicated to peace talks and negotiations. Or something.

Hilda’s not sure what, exactly, Edelgard had intended to discuss. Probably something to do with the Almyran border, though she could have just sent a message directly to Claude—no, Khalid—or even Holst, for that matter. He’s the one who’s been in charge of fighting the Almyrans at the Throat, though that’s all starting to change now. What does Hilda have to do with any of this?

It doesn’t matter now, of course, because they barely had the chance to speak before they were attacked, knocked out, and tied up together alone in the dark. It feels like they’re moving, and every once in a while, Hilda feels a small bump. They’re probably in a carriage or wagon, being taken somewhere else for…she’s not quite sure what.

This is why Hilda avoided Edelgard at the Academy. There was always something about her—her serious demeanor, her strong will, her ambition—that set off warning bells in Hilda’s head. Don’t get involved with her, they said. You’ll just get caught in her whirlwind. Now look where she is.

“Ugh,” Hilda groans, “who are these guys, anyway? I thought the war was over. If they’re your enemies, then what do I have to do with it?”

“They’re enemies to all of Fódlan, not just me,” Edelgard replies matter-of-factly. “I worked with them in the past, but only because we shared a common enemy in the Church. Now that our alliance is done with, we’re fighting our own war, though most of it takes place in the shadows rather than out in the open.”

If Hilda could, she’d rub her temples. “Sounds exhausting. Finish one war, start another.” Her head hurts just thinking about it.

“After we defeat them, the fighting will be over for good,” Edelgard replies, a sense of conviction in her voice—impressive, considering their current situation. “I swear it.”

“Good to know,” Hilda says, squirming. She’s starting to sweat due to their combined body heat (and definitely no other reason). “But first, I think we should focus on getting out of here.”

“Right,” Edelgard says. “Hubert had a feeling something like this would happen. We have a system set in place. He should be here soon.”

“Ughhh,” Hilda says, both at the mere thought of that creepster and also at the thought of having to wait for him to save them. “You don’t think we can get out of here ourselves? It’s just rope, right?”

She feels Edelgard shrug in response. “We can try.”

She and Edelgard both strain against their bindings, to no avail. Even with their combined muscle—for, despite their short statures, Hilda knows they’re both quite strong—the ropes barely budge.

Hilda kicks her foot out and feels it connect with what is probably one wall of the wagon. She kicks again—and feels something small and sharp jab against the sole of her shoe.

“Oh, hey,” she says. “Help me scoot over here. I think I found something.”

She and Edelgard inch their way closer to the sharp object. With what limited reach she has, Hilda feels around against the wall until her fingers brush against what she thinks is a nail sticking out of the wood.

“A-ha!” she hisses, so as not to alarm whoever might be driving the carriage. She holds her tied-up hands next to the nail and slides the rope back and forth against the rough edge.

It doesn’t cut cleanly, but after a good thirty seconds, the rope tying Hilda’s hands together splits apart and falls to the ground, freeing them along with her lower arms. She bends her neck down and, with her hands unbound, pushes her blindfold away from her face.

The wagon is covered and dark, but there are cracks in the wood that let enough light in for Hilda to see. There doesn’t seem to be much else in here besides them. Huh. Where’d they put Freikugel?

“If your hands are free,” Edelgard says, “do you think you could reach into my left boot?”

With their backs against each other, it’s difficult to maneuver. Edelgard twists her hips and bends her knees until both of her feet are near her left side. The ropes are tight, constricting like a boa and pressing Edelgard’s boots flush against her skin, but Hilda manages to slip her fingers into the left one. She feels the hilt of something metal and slides it out with only mild resistance. Sure enough, it’s a dagger.

“I didn’t particularly want to carry any weapons,” Edelgard says, “but Hubert insisted I at least take that.”

Hilda isn’t sure whether or not that’s the truth, but she supposes she shouldn’t be passing judgment right now, considering that this dagger is going to make things a lot easier for them. She cuts the ropes from Edelgard’s feet, then her own, followed by the thicker ropes tying them both together. When those fall to the floor, she and Edelgard sigh in unison, letting their bodies relax. Hilda cuts the bindings from Edelgard’s wrists and hands her the dagger, and Edelgard removes her blindfold.

“Hm,” Hilda mutters, staring down at her now entirely free body. “Kind of amateurish, if you ask me. If it weren’t for that dark magic knocking us out, I’m sure we could’ve taken them.”

“Something tells me this wasn’t a coordinated attack,” Edelgard says. “I think it might just be a small group who happened across us and decided to strike.”

“Oh, I get it!” Hilda says with a bit of a smirk. “It’s one of those ‘If I capture the Emperor and deliver her to Master, he will finally recognize my worth and promote me to Head Executioner’ things.”

Edelgard snorts. Hilda can’t help but feel mildly proud of herself.

“Anyway,” Edelgard says, “let’s try not to alarm them.”

They stick their heads out of the flaps on the back of the wagon, and Hilda squints against the sunlight. In the distance, she thinks she can see a black horse galloping toward them, with a few other horses just behind them.

“Timely as always,” Edelgard comments as Hubert comes more clearly into view.

Behind him, Hilda thinks she recognizes some of the former Black Eagles—Caspar and Dorothea. She didn’t take either of them for horseback riders, but they seem to be faring well enough.

At the front of the wagon, Hilda thinks she can hear some confused muttering, followed by the wagon slowing down. They probably heard the horses coming.

“So much for stealth,” Hilda says. “Oh, well. Time for payback.” She cracks her knuckles. She likes to pretend to be helpless, but the truth is, she doesn’t need Freikugel to kick these squishy mages’ asses all the way into next Tuesday.

Edelgard stares at her for a moment with an unreadable expression on her face. Then she clears her throat. “Er. Yes. Right.”

Was she…checking Hilda out?

No time to think about that, with their allies now directly in front of them. Caspar tosses a large axe in Edelgard’s direction, and Edelgard catches it with one hand.

It’s Hilda’s turn to gawk at that. Tiny but mighty, indeed—both of them.

She and Edelgard jump out of the wagon, which has now fully stopped. The dark mages, of which there are four, have hopped off their horses, and so have Caspar and Dorothea. Only Hubert remains mounted.

Five on four. This shouldn’t be difficult. They’ve all carved whole armies in half before.

Hilda lunges for the first mage she sees. With an uppercut, she knocks his stupid pointy mask right off his face. Then, while he’s staggering, Edelgard appears from behind her—Hilda didn’t even realize she was still there—and knocks him to the ground with the blunt end of her axe. She spins it around and points the blade at his neck.

“Who ordered this attack?” she demands, effortlessly assuming the role of the powerful emperor.

The mage hesitates. He seems to be looking somewhere behind him. Hilda glances over her shoulder and finds that the rest of his allies are in a similar state, with Hubert, Caspar, and Dorothea having each taken one down. It’s true, then—they’re amateurs, having only gotten the jump on Hilda and Edelgard due to stealth. Without that on their side, they’ve crumbled.

“Er, n-no one,” the mage stammers. “It was just us. Please, spare us!”

Edelgard and Hubert exchange glances. Hilda doesn’t doubt that Hubert would end them all without a second thought. But Edelgard…is she as ruthless as her second-in-command?

“Very well,” Edelgard says, turning back to the mage and removing the blade from his neck. “I doubt you will be telling your leader anything about your foolishness or your humiliating failure.”

The mage shakes his head rapidly.

“Then go,” Edelgard says. “All of you. Leave before I change my mind.”

The mages scramble to their feet and climb back on their horses. One of them drops Freikugel from where it had been resting on the front seat of the wagon. Hilda picks it up and slings it over her shoulder so that it rests against her back. Within a few seconds, the mages and their wagon are on their way, barreling down the path.

Edelgard lowers her axe. Hubert looks like he wants to say something, but he holds his tongue for the time being.

“Good work, everyone,” Edelgard says. “Hilda, I apologize deeply for the inconvenience. Incidentally, the matter I had intended to speak with you about is the same one you just saw for yourself.”

Hilda frowns. “Wait. So it doesn’t have anything to do with Almyra?”

“That’s only a small part of it,” Edelgard says. “If that had been my only concern, you likely would not have been the person I would have contacted. But I need all the allies I can get in the fight against Those Who Slither in the Dark, and you were suggested to me.”

“Those Who Slither in the Dark?” Hilda repeats with a snort. “That’s what they’re called?”

Edelgard puts a hand to her forehead. “Hubert came up with the name. We still don’t know what they actually call themselves.”

Hilda crosses her arms over her chest. “So, what, you came here to ask me if I wanted to join your cause?”

“In essence, yes,” Edelgard says. A tiny smile graces her lips. “It appears you and I work well together. I would be sure to compensate you appropriately if you agreed to lend me your hand—and your blade—once again.”

Hilda can hear that little voice in her head again, telling her to refuse. You’ll only have to do more work, it says. You won’t live up to her expectations. You’ll disappoint her. Besides, nothing good can come of getting involved with her. But that’s not necessarily true, now, is it?

Hilda thinks about how they helped each other without a second thought. She thinks about Edelgard’s body pressed against hers, thinks about Edelgard’s laugh at Hilda’s little quip.

“Well,” Hilda says, cocking her hip, “I suppose if you really want me to join you…”

Caspar cheers. Dorothea runs up to Hilda and slings an arm around her shoulders. “That’s a yes,” she sings triumphantly. “Let’s go, everyone! Enbarr awaits.”

As she drags Hilda over to one of the horses, Hilda thinks she sees Dorothea wink at Edelgard. Edelgard’s face burns bright red, and she makes a throat-cutting motion with her finger.

Hilda tries—and fails—to hold back a mischievous grin. Perhaps working with the Emperor won’t be so bad after all.

[dracothedeatheatingcupcake-ao3]

Mondo Owada DIY Jacket

Hey all! So, for the past couple of weeks, I've been working on making my own version of Mondo's jacket! I was originally going to wait until it was finished to post about it, since that's what I tend to do with my projects, but I figured I could post in progress shots, since I'm very excited about it! I'm almost done with the back, I just need to paint the last couple rows of kanji in, but I've got the basic outline down with gold chalk pen, so as long as I follow it it should hopefully still look good.

I am using a leather duster jacket that I bought for cheap from Good Will several years ago, back when I was obsessed with Spike from Buffy and wanted his jacket. It has just been hanging in my parent's closet for the past decade, however, getting no use since it's a bit too big for me and kind of bulky. So I decided that I could probably turn it into Mondo's jacket with some gold leather paint and some new buttons, maybe some new purple lining and an extended collar if I can figure out how to do that. Currently I'm working on the painting part first, since that's the most important element of Mondo's jacket. The alterations to the jacket itself are a bit daunting to me, since I've never done anything like it, so I'll put that off for now, ha.

Here's what I had after the first day of painting. I decided to do the Japanese version of Mondo's jacket, since it looks cooler, and I like how it turned out! I did mess up the spacing on the kanji, but I think it still looks decent enough. I also forgot one of the kanji words, but I luckily had enough space to add it in, messing up the spacing more, but eh. Beggars cannot be choosers and all.

So here's how it looks with the additional kanji added in, which I did the next day.

The first picture is what I had when I finished the second day of work. I added the extra kanji at the top, as well as the first row of kanji below. I also added a couple extra coats of gold paint to the compass and larger kanji, and cleaned up the areas where I accidently spilled some paint with some rubbing alcohol. Note: I do not advise using rubbing alcohol on leather, as it will harm the leather. I, however, preferred to have the paint off, so I tried to be careful about it. I did later buy some leather cleaner and conditioner to try and keep the leather healthy. It doesn't rub the paint off, though, which is both good and bad. Good since I can clean this jacket without worrying about the paint, bad since I still will have to use rubbing alcohol to remove the paint I mess up on. Oop.

The second photo is where I am today, with two of the rows of kanji fully painted and complete, and the other three having the outline drawn, but still needing to be painted in with my gold leather paint. I'd work on it more now, but my work station for arts and crafts is outside and it's currently dark out, making it hard to see what I'm doing. In fact, that's why I had to pause work for a week, since I work until 6:00 every weekday and it would be dark when I got home. It also was raining pretty bad this last week. Luckily I'm off work for the next two weeks, so I should have enough time to finish this, I hope! If it doesn't rain anymore, ha.

I'm hoping to be finished with the back tomorrow, and after that I'm going to work on the front, which I'm a bit nervous about. There's a lot of thin lines on the front, which I'm not great at painting. As you can see if you look close at the compass, the lines all wonky, oof. Hopefully it'll still look good regardless. Too bad they don't make gold leather paint pens! The sleeve is going to be the hardest, since there's a dragon on there, so... wish me luck!

Anyway, I'll post updates as I go from now on, more for my own benefit than anything. Let me know if anyone is bothered by it and I can put the updates under a "read more" in the future. ^-^

[anneapocalypse]

Dragon Age: Origins Re-Play (City Elf Rogue)

Crosspost. Originally posted on dreamwidth on 5/5/20.

Warnings: discussion of fictional sexual violence and coercion, abusive relationships, canon-typical power dynamics and political power structures.

After all these years, I think I've found my favorite Warden.

Well, let me back up.

It's been a long time since I've fallen down the Dragon Age well. I put it like that because picking up this game always seems to mean I get deeply immersed, and the game takes over as much of my life as I can reasonably allow until it's out of my system and I'm ready to move on. So needless to say, I don't play all that much, because I can't really afford that most of the time! But if there were ever a time to fall facefirst into a fantasy world with fictional problems I can actually solve, now would be it. And now that I'm through the first game, here is a long and rambling entry all about the experience and the thoughts on the game and the universe that this new playthrough has given me.

I dove into Origins a couple weeks ago with the intent of replaying the whole series… and actually finishing Inquisition this time around. And uh, playing all the DLC I never got to, oops. It's not for lack of interest I never played them all, and I never actually meant to skip them; I was holding out on Witch Hunt, for example, because I always meant to play a male Warden and romance Morrigan but I just never got all the way through that playthrough and most of the time I prefer to play a female character so it's probably just never going to happen. [Edited to add: Famous last words, Apocalypse.] In a more general sense, despite beating the main game a couple of times, I'd never quite found a favorite character and definitive playthrough I would carry forward into the rest of the games. I've played through most of the origins and started several characters I was fond of, but I haven't completed one since my second playthrough.

Despite my love for the games, Dragon Age fandom also isn't one I've delved far into, though I did skirt the edges for a few years (and you'll find a few poems set in the universe if you dig into my AO3). I found BioWare fandoms to be particularly… volatile, and I had the unfortunate experience of encountering a lot of people with a lot of opinions about the "right" way to play the games, which pretty much runs contrary to the entire way I think about RPGs. My way of enjoying a video game is no more right than anyone else's, and with every playthrough the way I see the story and the characters is heavily colored by the character I've chosen to play. I think that's part of the fun. With games like these, every playthrough is a new story.

Gameplay Thoughts

I decided to play on Casual this time around, as I've already beaten the game a couple of times and I'm more interested in experiencing the story than in making the combat challenging. I enjoy the combat, but I don't enjoy getting stuck and struggling over and over to beat an enemy without dying.

Although the game will allow you to do the main quests preceding the Landsmeet in any order, they actually scale by difficulty in a specific order (as detailed here) and so on a higher difficulty or as an inexperienced player, it is very possible to stumble into a high-level quest too soon and get stuck, as I did multiple times on my first playthrough. I'm a much more experienced player now, with a much better understanding of the game mechanics, so I'm much less likely to get stuck now. And of course I could simply do the quests in the optimal order—but that also dictates which companions will be available for which quests. (For example, if you always do Broken Circle first, you'll never have the opportunity to recruit Zevran before that quest and you'll never get to see his Fade nightmare.)

So playing on Casual actually broadens my options for role-playing and character interactions quite a bit! And on this playthrough, that's what I'm here for.

I also made a point on this playthrough of exhausting the companion dialogue branches as soon as they became available so as not to miss anything. This can be a little comical at times, as it's possible with most companions to rack up approval points very quickly through dialogue, and thus you can advance relationships very quickly if you choose the right responses—and that's why, in the past, I've sometimes tried to space out the conversations just to roleplay a relationship progressing more organically. In doing so, though, I've definitely missed some things! I heard dialogue I've never heard before on this playthrough, and even played through a companion quest I've somehow always failed to unlock despite knowing it existed.

I also managed to accidentally start romancing Leliana while I was already romancing Zevran, which was entertaining. I do enjoy the fact that if you tell Leliana she's welcome to join you and Zevran, she sounds surprised but interested, and I wish it were possible to actually romance them both as a triad! Sadly, the game is not built for polyships, so I had to load a save to avoid creating a love triangle and breaking her heart. I always save before making the rounds in camp so I didn't lose any progress.

Character Creation

My first two playthroughs were both Cousland, romancing Alistair; human rogue just happened to be the first origin I chose, and the second was my "do-over" playthrough in which I actually consulted walkthroughs and did all the sidequests and got all the cool stuff I missed on my first, spoiler-free playthrough. This tends to be how I play RPGs. I've also started several unfinished playthroughs, and at this point I think the only origin I haven't played through is dwarf noble. I'll probably play through it sometime just to see it, but I doubt I'll complete the game; after two Cousland runs I've had my fill of nobles and would much rather play an underdog. [ETA: And that's 0 for 2.]

After some deliberation I decided this playthrough would be a city elf rogue. I almost always play a rogue; I have no interest in warriors [ETA: Okay, really, past!Anne, this is just getting embarassing], and while mages are cool, I just have a preference for daggers and archery and subterfuge. I also decided I'd be romancing Zevran. It was a tough call between him and Leliana, but I thought my scrappy city elf would have a lot more in common with the Antivan assassin.

And thus was born Ilana "daggers at dawn" Tabris! Alas, I am playing on console at the moment and the 360 doesn't have a built-in screenshot feature, so until I employ some more creative methods (or do a PC playthrough for screenshots) I don't have a good picture of her at the moment to share.

The City Elf Origin

For my readers not familiar with Dragon Age, in this setting elves are a marginalized people; they were formerly enslaved in Ferelden, and still are in some other nations. There is a cultural divide between Dalish elves, who live nomadic lives committed to reclaiming and preserving their cultural heritage, and non-Dalish elves, who may live in impoverished "alienages" within major cities, or work as servants for land-owning humans. It's easy to see some parallels to real-world marginalized groups in the Dragon Age elves and there are plenty of valid critiques to be made based on seeing the elves through that lens. When it comes to in-game immersion, I'm of the opinion that the story works best if you don't assume a direct parallel to any one specific group, and that's all I'll say about that at the moment.

The city elf rogue origin is a rough one, probably the roughest in the game, and this is a game where one possible origin is the player character's entire family being murdered. In the city elf origin, the PC's cousin is raped just offscreen; the PC rescues her and several other women from further brutality but arrives too late to stop what happens to Shianni, though they do have the option to kill the men responsible. Whether this was a good storytelling decision on the part of BioWare is another conversation for another day. Suffice it to say I've seen this origin before and I knew what was coming, and for that reason I honestly never figured this origin would be a favorite for me.

So it was a surprise that Ilana has turned out to be my favorite character I've built yet in Origins. But there is more to the city elf origin than that one awful event, and there are some things I uniquely like about the Warden being an elf who grew up in the Denerim alienage, keenly aware of human politics and their own status relative to it, but also surrounded by a close-knit community. I think it gives the Warden a unique perspective, just as the Dalish elf or circle mage or Dwarf commoner have their own unique perspectives.

Companionable Thoughts

Through some dialogue I think I missed on previous runs, I realized that prior to the battle of Denerim, Alistair seems to have a lot of faith in Loghain. I suppose this makes the betrayal cut that much deeper.

I've always had mixed feelings about hardening Alistair because I don't particularly like the way that conversation goes, or the way the game frames Goldanna as a bitter shrew and a gold-digger when in fact she's an impoverished working mother trying to get by who has little patience for a well-heeled stranger barging into her life and asking for her attention and affection. I'm not saying Alistair doesn't have a right to be upset, but I think the dialogue as written doesn't really allow for the Warden to sympathize with Goldanna's side of things—as indeed a Warden who grew up in poverty might do. I also don't think the dialogue option, "Everyone is out for themselves. You should learn that," quite nails what Alistair's real problem is.

I can however appreciate that the spirit of "hardening" Alistair is supposed to be convincing him to stand up for himself—and that the results of said hardening can be something of a mixed bag.

Seeing him through the eyes of a new player character gave me a new perspective on Alistair. It really stood out to me this time around how much he saw the Grey Wardens as a family above all else, despite having been recruited a mere six months ago. That's certainly enough time to get attached to people, but it's also deeply colored by Alistair's longing for a real family, and I think it's fair to say he projects that desire onto the Wardens, sometimes to a fault. At the Landsmeet, for example, if he's appointed to duel Loghain he will kill him no matter what, even when it ruins the plans he and the Warden had previously agreed upon, because he takes Duncan's death extremely personally and is unwilling to set those feelings aside for anything. When the Warden discuss the future of the Grey Wardens with him, he is still hung up on the fact that things will never feel the same, rather than the fact that the order must be rebuilt and maintained for whenever the next Blight comes.

None of this is to disparage Alistair as a character; he's a character I like, and I think his flaws make for a more interesting story no matter what the Warden's relationship to him ends up being.

I think it's easy to see, though, how Alistair's view of the Grey Wardens differs from Duncan's. One thing that was neat in this playthrough that I hadn't seen before was that I had Ilana do some stealing in the camp at Ostagar. Turns out, if Duncan sees you stealing, he'll praise your skill, but warn you that you should practice that skill with caution, because the law will not be kind to a thief, and your status as a Grey Warden will not always help you. It's one of many small things that demonstrate Duncan's commitment to stopping the Blight at any cost, and his understanding that they need everyone they can get. In the same vein, he points out to the city elf upon their conscription that it is not an act of charity.

This becomes relevant later. Particularly for this playthrough, because I'd decided early on that I would be conscripting Loghain, which I'd never done before and was interested to see how it played out. But more on that later!

Somehow, I have managed to miss Leliana's companion quest entirely on all my previous playthroughs, possibly because I didn't exhaust all the dialogue options at the right times—but the wiki also tells me there was a known bug, so it might not be my fault at all! The encounter with Marjolaine is very brief; what's really important is the conversation with Leliana that comes after.

It was especially significant to me that I had already taken Leliana to the Urn of Sacred Ashes, where the Guardian told her that she made up her vision of the Maker for attention.

And the thing is… I sort of believe him? That is to say, I don't think the Maker spoke directly to Leliana, but I do think that she believed that, at least for a time. If you listen to the way she describes the dream or vision she had, it's very vague, a series of images open to interpretation. I don't think Leliana consciously made up a story for attention. I do think that Marjolaine was an emotionally abusive partner in ways that long predated her betrayal. Leaving her left Leliana with some deep wounds that even the Chantry could not fully heal. She still had a need to believe that someone was commanding her and looking after her as Marjolaine had done. Not having fully examined those wounds and the emotions surrounding them, she simply found a replacement for Marjolaine in the meantime, one that gave her the sense of direction and security that she had lost. So in a sense, the Guardian is correct that she had a need to feel special, and chosen. But I don't believe it was conscious. I think Leliana truly had what she interpreted as a religious experience, and later, she has the opportunity to examine those feelings and experiences with a more critical eye.

Since I'd never triggered the companion quest before, seeing Leliana hardened was also new for me, and I must say that all of this makes Inquisition!Leliana (at least what I've seen of her in my incomplete playthrough) make much more sense to me. She hasn't lost her love for the Maker or the solace she found in the Chantry, but she has accepted that the life of a bard suits her better than the life of a cloistered sister. The Leliana we meet in Inquisition is a Leliana who has found a way to keep both of these things in her life, and that seems to me like a good thing. I haven't finished Inquisition, of course, and it's been a while since I played it, so my thoughts may change when I get there. But these are my present thoughts.

I hadn't actually planned on doing the Dark Ritual this playthrough. I've really never liked it, because coercing Alistair into having sex with someone he hates feels uh... bad, and the cutscene makes him look so distressed, it's just... always left a bad taste in my mouth. The idea was I'd conscript Loghain and have him die killing the Archdemon. Somehow it didn't occur to me that with Alistair leaving the party and Loghain in his place, it would be Loghain taking part in the ritual, not Alistair.

So I had to play through it once just to see, and it honestly came across much less creepy to me. Loghain seems a little perplexed, maybe, but not distressed, certainly not visibly repulsed as Alistair is. It didn't feel coercive in the way it had with Alistair, and in the end, I decided to keep it.

Romantic Inclinations

I was briefly very tempted to romance Leliana, because I do love her and I've never completed a romance playthrough with her. But I knew Zevran was going to be the best fit for Ilana and I was determined to see that one through.

And it was so, so worthwhile. I ended up absolutely loving Zevran's love story. I love that it can start out as more of a friends-with-benefits situation, in which the characters sleep together early on and flirt a lot and only after Zevran is free of the Crows do they confess that they have well and truly fallen for one another. I like that Zevran gets scared when he realizes how deep his feelings for the Warden are, and I enjoy the way that resolves. And I like the fact that even when they are in love, neither of them ask the other for promises.

I am well acquainted with Alistair's romance, and make no mistake, I did enjoy it greatly—but it's very complicated. Alistair is inexperienced in both relationships and sex, his feelings about the Grey Wardens are deeply tied up in his desire for a family, and he is unwillingly at the center of the political conflict in Ferelden because of his parentage. All of these things deeply affect his romance, and in fact they're part of the appeal of that story. That Alistair's personal flaws can come out more starkly in romancing him is also a feature, not a bug to me.

I remember being a bit taken aback during my first playthrough (in which I romanced Alistair and did not harden him) when right before they had sex he told my Cousland he couldn't imagine being without her, and then almost immediately after he said he had no idea what being King would mean for them. It was startling to realize that despite his feelings he wasn't necessarily committed to standing up for the Warden being his queen—and that's with a Warden who's a noble! But if anything that enhanced the story for me; less fairy-tale perfect, but a more realistically flawed character. (Jolene Cousland, it should be noted, had no such qualms; I played her as a benevolent but kind of selfish woman who was used to getting her way, and she put Anora on the throne and kept Alistair in the Wardens with her purely so that she would never have to share him with anyone!)

Alistair's romance is one that feels fairy-tale sweet but doesn't necessarily have a happy ending when it collides with duty and politics and Alistair's own flaws, and I do like that about it, for what it is!

Zevran, on the other hand, is much more the "bad boy with a sad past saved by true love" trope, certainly just as appealing in its own way! I think for my own part, at least right now, Zevran just appeals to me more. I like that he's more experienced and less sentimental; I enjoy his sauciness and I love watching him open up to the Warden about his past as they grow close. And though the ending slides are not all necessarily canon, it does please me that Zevran is said to stay with the Warden and help train new Wardens though he never becomes one himself, which is pretty much exactly what I was already headcanoning.

Theories

I found myself thinking about the nature of the Guardian of the Urn of Sacred Ashes this time around. It's never quite explained how he has lived for so long (though there may be some canon on that that I haven't gotten to yet). It's possible the power simply comes from the Ashes, or from Andraste herself somehow. Given Wynne's experience with a Fade spirit joining with her to extend her life, I wonder if it's possible that the Guardian has also been sustained by a spirit who approves of his motives.

So, knowing what we know now… Goldanna definitely isn't Fiona's child, right? From the sound of it, she was actually the child of a servant who died in childbirth. It's unclear to me at this time whether Maric is in fact Goldanna's father as well (after reading The Stolen Throne, I am confident he is not), but it doesn't sound like it. So the confusion arises from the untruth Alistair was told about his mother; she was never a serving girl, and Goldanna is probably not related to him in any way.

Worldbuilding Thoughts

One thing that struck me early in the game is that the priest presiding over the elven weddings, while she pleads with Vaughan to leave them alone, is really powerless to stop his violence against the elves. I think this says a certain amount about the position of the Chantry relative to the nobility. Priests may be exclusively women in this world but it does not follow that Thedas is an egalitarian society; it very much isn't, and there is ample dialogue throughout the games to support this.

One thing I spent a lot of time thinking about in this playthrough was land, and landholding as sociopolitical power in this universe. It was a pleasant surprise to find that I did have the ability to enact some change for elves in Ferelden; among the boons Anora will grant you as Queen, if you say you want your people treated fairly, she will declare the Alienage part of the bannorn and appoint an elven Bann (I appointed Shianni). And with the Arling of Amaranthine granted to the Wardens, as long as the Warden-Commander is an elf, that's two elven voices in the Landsmeet. The Landsmeet holds most of the political power in Ferelden. This is certainly not an instant fix for the marginalization of elves in Thedas, but it's a step, and a big one. (This is also part of the reason I don't care for the idea of the Warden-Commander stepping down after just a few years when they could continue to wield that influence.)

According to the wiki, there is an ending slide indicating that if Shianni is made Bann of the alienage, she's later murdered, and there are riots in the alienage prompting a crackdown from the monarchy, so… that's not great. I didn't actually see that slide in my game, however, because it's bugged, but I suppose it is still canon.

But my point isn't so much where things are better for elves following the Fifth Blight—I'd agree with Cyrion that the influence of an elven Hero can only be a good thing in the long run, but also systematic injustice doesn't just vanish overnight. What really interested me was the larger question of land as power. So long as Ferelden works the way it does, as a feudal monarchy/aristocratic oligarchy, controlling land is the only way to have real political power. (This is not only true under feudalism, by the by, but that's another conversation for another day!) Elven oppression isn't just about humans being mean to elves, or elves living in poverty. So long as elves are systematically prevented from holding land, whether Dalish or city elves, they will continue to be disenfranchised. Land is power; that's why Amaranthine is such a big deal, why the Alienage Bann is such a big deal.

The principle that land is power also has ramifications for mages, and that made something click for me that I never really put together on previous playthroughs, despite the fact that it's basically laid out for you in The Arl of Redcliffe quest. The whole reason Arlessa Isolde goes to such lengths to hide Connor's magic is that mages cannot hold land or titles. If Connor is a mage, Eamon has lost his heir. Now I don't doubt that Isolde genuinely loves Connor just as her son; she's willing to die to save him, after all, without hesitation. But his magic also means that the Guerrin line will be broken unless Isolde bears another heir. And as we can see from his opinions about Alistair and the line of Calenhad, Eamon is the kind of old aristocrat who puts great stock in bloodlines. Without an heir, his family line is ended, his lands lost.

(This also comes up in Dragon Age II, by the by, with the mention of the Amell family being tarnished by magic in their bloodlines, but we'll get to DAII in another post!)

Anyway, this all puts into sharper focus the systematic disenfranchisement of elves and of mages as well. So often in Dragon Age, the oppression of mages is put in terms of their being locked in a tower and hunted by templars if they resist. And to be clear, those are in fact the primary stakes for most individuals. In DA2, in particular, we see that abuse of mages by templars is a very real problem.

But at a societal level, the disenfranchisement of mages comes down to this: mages functionally cannot own land. No matter how powerful or wealthy their family, magic strips the individual of property rights under Ferelden Chantry law. There are no mages in the Landsmeet, by design. I would imagine that a mage Warden being granted the Arling of Amaranthine would be almost as big a shake-up as an elf. The wiki tells me that a mage Warden can ask that the Circle be granted independence, though this, like the Alienage Bann, seems to also provoke a backlash. Though I guess it's been retconned now, the ending slide for an independent Circle had Cullen murdering three apprentices and eventually escaping from prison, "a madman and a threat to any mage he encountered."

Land is power in Ferelden, and as long as this society functions the way it does, the only way to real political power for elves, mages, or Grey Wardens is to hold land.

DLC

There is something a little comical to me about the montage of Cailain's last days and his death that you see when the Warden gazes on his body in Return to Ostagar. I'm not exactly saying there should be no emotion attached to Cailan's death, but well… the Warden barely met the man, and as a city elf Ilana Tabris was not exactly overcome with reverence for the King of Ferelden. It might be more appropriate framed by Alistair than the Warden, but even Alistair's grief at Ostagar is much more centered around Duncan than Cailan.

I haven't yet managed to get very deeply attached to Shale as a character (though that could still change), but I do appreciate her relevance to the Orzammar questline and her own search for answers about her past.

I never actually got around to playing the pre- and post-game DLC for Origins, and was very excited to finally experience them as a part of a playthrough I was so happy with.

Leliana's Song was great fun. It definitely provides some insight into Leliana's life before the Warden; it's one thing to hear about it, another thing to see it through her eyes. I think the ending really drives home the sting of Marjolaine's betrayal and the loss of belonging and purpose that drove Leliana to the Chantry.

Going into Awakening, I was initially unsure exactly how long after the end of the main game it was, and what I could assume to have transpired in the meantime. The Warden-Commander seems unfamiliar with Vigil's Keep so one has to assume this is their first time going there. I do find that a little odd once I realize that it's six months since the Archdemon was defeated, but I suppose there are plenty of ways to fill in those blanks.

I also have to wonder when Warden's Keep was written in relation to Awakening, because the existence of Soldier's Peak ends up feeling a little redundant with the Wardens being given the Arling of Amaranthine and Vigil's Keep. I say a little redundant, because Warden's Keep is largely about Grey Warden history, where Awakening deals with other themes I'll get into later. And maybe the ending of Warden's Keep is more meant to imply that it becomes the Drydens' new home, but I like Soldier's Peak and the idea of it becoming a Grey Warden base of ops again, and the fact that the game gives you a storage chest there certainly implies it's at least a little bit that.

The story sort of requires that there be Grey Wardens at Vigil's Keep when the darkspawn attack, and also that none of them survive so the Warden-Commander can have everything fall back on their shoulders and also feel the necessity of recruiting more Wardens. It does feel a little bit like plot necessity, like oh, those Orlesian Wardens did finally arrive, but you never got to meet them and they're dead now, oops. And I think the explanation for why they were all killed when that wasn't actually the intent was a little flimsy. Nevertheless, it functions to get the story rolling, and I do like this story.

I enjoyed King Alistair's brief visit and the tension that allows. I don't know how intentional it was, or whether this scene just doesn't take Alistair's possible falling out with the Warden into account, but I appreciated that while there's an option to respond to him sarcastically (which I of course took), Alistair doesn't sound hostile himself, just kind of… wistful. It doesn't feel discontinuous with the falling-out necessarily. There's distance, but he can't quite hide that he still cares.

As this was my first playthrough of Awakening, I did miss a few things, accidentally locking myself out of completing a couple of sidequests and not triggering all the companion quests. I will definitely be replaying Awakening at some point and probably with Ilana so that I can complete her story the way I'd like.

Saving the city of Amaranthine was not a difficult choice, especially with the Keep fully upgraded. Whether or not to kill the Architect was a much more difficult choice. I played through the ending in which I killed him, slept on it, and decided to load and play the other ending, and sparing him ended up being Ilana's choice.

I love the letter from Zevran found in the Codex during Awakening. It makes sense that he would have some unfinished business to take care of with the Crows and it's a good enough reason to explain his absence. The letter is very characteristically Zevran and the closing of "Yours always" is so sweet.

I didn't love Awakening's ending slide for Zevran quite as much, as it adds an ambiguity to the outcome of their relationship, which… it doesn't really ruin anything, because it never says for sure what happened between them, I guess it just seemed unnecessary to me to cast doubt on what the main game's ending slide had implied was a happy ending in which Zevran stays with the Warden. That is the ending I prefer, and I choose to read the Awakening end slide as more hearsay than truth. (Awakening's slides are already not fully canon; Anders did not in fact stay with the Wardens, but eventually left for the Free Marches and wound up in Kirkwall.) And looking at certain wiki entries pertaining to Inquisition, it looks as though the Warden and Zevran do stay together, so I shall be content with that. This is all, of course, through the lens of me being freshly off playing through this romance and being in starry-eyed love with it! None of this is bad storytelling, just me being sentimental about it.

Likewise I'm not in love with Awakening's ending slide for the Warden herself. I understand that by indicating that the Warden-Commander stepped down from that role not long after the Blight, the series is relieved of any future need to account for their whereabouts. And again, looking at some canon from Inquisition, it looks like there are some good reasons for the Warden striking out alone. That said, I do prefer to imagine that Ilana remains Commander of the Grey for some years, as the rebuilding of the order is a task she takes quite seriously.

Regardless, I can certainly imagine Ilana would be ready for some respite following the events in Amaranthine, and that she would take that time to seek out Zevran in Antiva to aid him in his own quest, leaving Loghain to oversee the Wardens until her return.

Golems of Amgarrak I did not particularly enjoy, as it's mostly one big tedious puzzle. The connection to the Harvester in Dragon Age II is interesting, but all in all I'm not sure it's a DLC I would bother playing again. As it's not even mentioned in the Dragon Age Keep for importing into Inquisition, I doubt it would be any great loss to skip it.

Witch Hunt was short but satisfying, even as it raises many questions. I'm always happy to see Sandal again and it's neat that he's at the Circle Tower. I actually had a great time browsing all the library books in the Circle Tower, and it was one of the highlights of the DLC for me. Ariane isn't the most memorable character, and it's a little disappointing that her conflict with Morrigan resolves itself with no real interaction between the two of them; she and Finn definitely kind of feel like they're just thrown in so the Warden can have companions, and it's a short DLC so you don't get to spend much time with them, though I did find Finn to be a lot of fun. I was certainly entertained to find Ariane wearing armor identical to Ilana's.

In addition to that armor model, this DLC reuses a lot of environments to get you to Morrigan, and its real focus is that final confrontation.

I don't think it's a particularly expansive or cohesive DLC all told, but I did enjoy it, especially the ending. I like that it's still possible to end things on a friendly note with Morrigan, even if you can't go with her. I know Morrigan shows up in Inquisition and that's about the extent of what I know, but I'm pretty excited to find out what she's been up to in the meantime.

The one DLC story I've left unplayed is the Darkspawn Chronicles, which I honestly don't have a ton of interest in, and for those who've played it, I'm curious if there's anything really interesting or canon-critical that I'm missing. BioWare is notorious for the fact that no content is truly optional if you're invested, and that has certainly become very clear to me with the rest of these DLC (and the novels, and the comics), but Darkspawn Chronicles is basically an AU from my understanding, and playing as a darkspawn does not really interest me. Am I missing anything? Let me know!

[atmilliways]

For the smut prompts... either 42 or 43 for hammertooth? (if you feel like it!)

I finished this a couple weeks ago but totally spaced on posting it, oops. I guess it counts towards Rare Pair Month, but I can't decide on which prompt it fits best. Whatever. Here it is!

Prompts: 42) “I guess I’ll just get off all by myself.” ; 43) “Don’t you want to play with me?”

To Live For You

Magnus had always thought that falling in love was about being willing to die for someone. That’s what it had always been in movies and books, even when he got old enough for the kinds of entertainment that had sex in them too. So he’d always been sure that love wasn’t anything he was interested in, because he couldn’t imagine ever making that sacrifice for anyone.

~

“Maaaagnus. Ams you coming to beds?” Toki is sprawled across the sheets, easily taking up the entire mattress—a double, because he’d sworn up and down that a smaller bed is better for cuddling.

If it weren’t for the younger man’s complete and utter nakedness, Magnus would pretend to complain about there not being any room to join him. This sight never fails to leave him momentarily speechless.

~

Then he had almost died. Almost killed himself, in fact, but not for anyone.

Well. Maybe for himself. That instant when the veil had come off and he’d realized how massively, hugely, collossally he had fucked up had been really fucking harsh, and he hadn’t wanted to face it. Because teaming up with cannibals and murderers? Against actual, literal gods? After being so firm in his conviction that he’d had everything in hand and was totally in the right, he’d just figured there was no coming back.

~

Toki’s hands wander down his washboard abs, teasing. He wets his lips suggestively and then puts on an impressive pout. “Don’ts you wants to plays with me?”

His hands dip lower. Magnus, watching, swallows hard.

~

The thing was, he’d come back anyway—or been dragged back, really, and he’d deserved it for trying to duck out of the hard part.

Dying, it turned out, was easy. It was living that was hard.

~

“Yeah,” Magnus says, finding his voice again. It’s a touch hoarser than it was when he’d last left it. He has no idea what to do with his hands. “Yeah, I’m coming. You starting without me, sweetheart?”

Toki grins in that way he does, like Magnus has made his day just by noticing him. Of course I noticed you, Magnus thinks, have you seen you? It’s far more of a miracle that Toki wants his eyes (well, eye anyway) on him at all.

His gaze catches on the one scar on Toki’s front, the place where his knife had come out the other side. There’s a familiar clench in his gut at the sight—the one that reminds him that he doesn’t deserve this, and the only reason he gets it anyway is purely by the grace of this young god (retired).

It doesn’t send him into a downward spiral quite the way it used to, but the reminder is always there. A cautionary road marker: danger, do not swerve again.

~

And it had been very, very hard. Magnus didn’t like to think about the early days of his recovery. Between being dragged into some mess of apocalyptic prophecy and coming to terms with the horrible things he’d done, he’d been a menace to anyone who had come within snapping distance. With all the excuses stripped away, he’d stumbled through the painful process of really looking at himself and his choices.

~

“Well,” Toki says coyly, recapturing his full attention, “I thoughts if you were going to stays up longer over theres I’d just . . . gets off all by myself. . . .”

Magnus is watching his face now, but knows the exact moment Toki takes himself in hand from the way his breathing changes and eyelashes flutter. The show he’s putting on is having its intended effect; Magnus’ fingers twitch reflexively from muscle memory, and getting out of these jeans is an increasingly appealing idea.

He is not lucky. He has not earned this. But still, he has it, and he’s trying to be worthy.

~

It had taken years, and one world-wide close call with oblivion, barely averted, before Magnus dragged himself in front of Toki to offer amends. He hadn’t expected forgiveness, knowing that he didn’t deserve it—but, as his therapist had told him repeatedly until threatening finally to tattoo it on his arm just so it would finally stick, it wasn’t about deserving anything.

Saying it, apologizing, while looking into the eyes of someone he’d literally stabbed, kidnapped, and held in a basement, had been the final stab in the gut that had really, really driven it home. Everything he’d done laid out before him, laid bare in his own eyes while the ultimate figure of accountability watched him unpack it all, piece by fucking piece. Magnus had done it because he’d earned the pain of it, and afterwards Toki had touched him on the shoulder and said three words that had dragged him back to life.

I forgives you.

~

“You’re such a fucking flirt,” Magnus mutters, grinning. He’s already fumbling with his belt because, as far as he’s concerned, what Toki wants Toki gets. Once it’s undone he gets his pants, underwear, and boots off in two kicks. His shirt follows, a simple matter of shrugging out of it since the front is, as always, already undone.

Compared to Toki, Magnus is scrawny and wrinkled. He feels self-conscious about this sometimes, but Toki always tells him it ams just how bodies are, and he tries to believe him as best he can. The matching knife scar on his own chest (same knife, same hand) doesn’t bear thinking about.

He perches on the edge of the bed near Toki’s hip, birdlike, still unsure of where to put his hands. Such a shame that everywhere isn’t a practical option; Toki would like that.

Once, Toki had told him that’s what being a god had felt like: millions of hands all reaching out in unison to touch, pray, worship him, more intoxicating than all the drugs and alcohol in the world. He doesn’t talk about it often, worried that Magnus might get jealous or something, but when he does there’s this faraway expression on his face like he misses it. Maybe not enough to go back—if he even could, Magnus has no idea—but a good memory nonetheless.

“I'm here now, see?”

~

It wasn’t about what he deserved. Sometimes, what he’d done crept up on him and left him feeling so ashamed at the person he had used to be that he could have died all over again—but he didn’t.

Magnus had never thought he’d be worth the work it would take to piece himself back together until he felt like a person again. He still didn’t.

Toki always told him that he was worth it because he didn’t feel like he was but still tried anyway. For Toki.

~

“I sees you,” Toki sighs, and reaches for Magnus’ hands. He guides one to his half-hard cock, wrapping it around and guiding it to move with his, and the other to his mouth, kissing the knuckles. His breath and lips are hot against Magnus’ skin. “Wants to feels you, toos.”

“Is that so.” Magnus leans over him to steal a quick kiss, then shifts around so he isn’t reaching at a weird angle, and settles with one knee between the other man’s toned, tan legs.

He has, on other occasions, explored every inch of those legs with his hands and mouth. Other parts of him too. All of him. And he will likely do so again, many times, before the next time death comes for him. For now, Magnus follows the guidance of his lover’s hands. He watches as Toki draws his fingers into his mouth like a sucking candy, overwhelmed—first one, then a second, then a third—and sits up obediently when Toki urges him to.

“Wants you,” Toki moans again, biting his lip, urging the pace faster and giving Magnus his fingers back to prepare with.

So he does, eagerly, and before long he’s lining up, teasing against Toki’s weeping head until hands grip his hips tightly but firmly and pull him down like gravity.

Toki’s eyes are shining, starlike. “Loves you, Magnus,” he says breathlessly.

~

For Toki.

~

Magnus wonders if that really is starlight, some sort of cosmic leftover from whatever it was exactly that Dethklok went off to do as gods when they saved the world, or if it’s something else. He’d always assumed that love was about being willing to walk through fire, but maybe—and this is based both on himself and what he knows of Toki’s shitty childhood—it’s the willingness to crawl towards the light.

“I love you too.”

[kerie-prince]

We're Worlds Apart (2)

Draco Malfoy x American No-Maj!reader

series m.list | general m.list | previous chp

warnings: light cursing, mentions of death, angsty Draco

summary: Draco Malfoy is a pureblood wizard. Magic runs through his veins and has been since his birth. You're a Wiccan No-Maj; a non-magical being with ordinary blood through your veins, but practices what you call magick. And this very practice upsets your neighbor.

(gif not mine)

The surrounding neighbors have been very nice; one elderly couple walked up to Draco’s door with an apple pie, quite the American staple, and he seemed to appreciate it. They seemed normal and sweet. Much unlike the feeling he had for his neighbor. Y/N. He hasn't made any attempts in the month that he's lived in the small suburban neighborhood to see her. He avoided her like she was a deadly plague.

Albeit, it was probably harsh and extremely childish. The whole point of him becoming a new person was changing his views he had been taught in adolescence. Or else why did he help Harry Potter all those years ago when he swore he hated him?

It was currently around 3 in the morning, he was standing in his backyard and made sure no one would be awake as he sent his owl to send a letter to his best friend, Blaise. He was the only person who still contacted Draco on a regular basis besides the occasional letter from Theodore. Gregory cut all contact with Draco after the Battle, especially since Vincent had died that night in the fire in the Room of Requirement. Pansy was living her life somewhere, and although the Golden Trio had forgiven Draco for his actions, it didn't start any friendships. But Draco was fine; Blaise and Theo had been there for him in more ways he cares to admit.

He never mentioned a word about Y/N to Blaise until now when he asked what Draco’s American neighbors were like. Majority of the letter contained contents of how work has been, the differences in not only culture but also how things are called, and just his own well being. He did say something short for the elderly couple, but when it came to Y/N he had a lot to say.

These muggles are far different from the ones in England, Blaise. They know things about the magic world but input a fantasy in their heads. They believe they can actually practice witchcraft and wizardry, calling themselves “Wiccan” or whatever rubbish it is. Bloody hell, they even have films and tv programs of them. My neighbor is one of these and she does the most ludacris things in her house. Quite laughable, really. If Salazar was alive today to see this happening, I’d bet he’d curse the whole lot.

She had been lingering in his mind since that day of his discovery. It was annoying him. Every night, he would catch her in her room doing whatever the hell she was doing and he felt as if the universe was mocking him. This is what people think what you really are was the message he got from it all. Draco never thought something like this would make him feel like a freak. But he did. This act of hers was an indirect insult of what he was capable of. And she had no idea.

—

It was a fine autumn morning. The shop was closed today, so you had lots of time at home to catch up with cleaning. You stood over your bathroom sink brushing your teeth and saw from the reflection of your mirror your cat stretching herself before walking into the bathroom to rub herself on your legs. “Good morning, Aurora,” you cooed at her. She purred in response and ran off to her tower in the living room.

After getting changed into some comfortable clothes, you walked up to a closet in the hallway that had collections of crystals, oils, sage bundles and more. “Let’s see, where did I put the angelica root?” you asked out loud to yourself. Going through the shelves, you pulled some sea salt, ground lemon balm, ground angelica root, and a feather. You carried the items outside in a bowl to your backyard and set them at a small garden table. Walking over to your garden, you pulled some elderberry flowers and started your cleansing spell.

You sprinkled the salt onto a censor dish and placed a charcoal dish on it and lit it up. In the bowl you had used to carry the items out, you started mixing the herbs together as you waited for the charcoal to burn red. Once it did, you sprinkled the herbs on top, creating a cleansing incense. You picked it up from the bottom of the censor dish, picked up the feather and made your way steadily to your front door, lightly wafting smoke towards it. Reaching your front door, you drew a pentagram over it with the feather and smoke,

“Be gone negativity,

Here now blessed be.”

You repeat your incantations throughout the house until you have finished and walked back to your living room, drawing one last pentagram. You placed your feather and censor dish on the bare floor, stood up and tapped your foot three times,

“By my will, so shall it be.

Sealed now shall this cleansing be.”

You sat on your couch and turned on the television, waiting for the incense to burn out so you could scatter it around your backyard. After a couple of hours of watching a guilty pleasure of yours, you decided to get some actual cleaning done. First thing was to do some trimming and gardening outside, so you grabbed some gloves and headed out back to your yard.

Before grabbing your garden scissors, you looked up and saw something rather strange. There was an owl in your neighbors yard. In broad daylight. From the backyard, you heard a car pull in and peeked over the fence to see that it was your neighbor coming home. You ran to the front leaving a dirt trail in your house and ran out the front door.

He hadn’t walked in yet, so you started waving your arm, “Hello! I’m Y/N!”

He had just nodded his head and walked a straight line to his door. Not wanting to lose this chance of having a conversation with him, you yelled for him one more time, “There’s an owl in your yard!” His eyes widened and without a word, he ran into his house in a panic. From a distance, you heard him say 'shit' before closing the door.

Building up confidence, you walked up to his door and knocked a few times and patiently waited. You fixed your hair and stood surprised as he hastily opened the door. “H-hi! It’s so nice to meet you, I'm Y/N,” you stretched your hand out to shake his hand. He looked at it and had a displeased look, causing unease within you. Looking at your hand, you noticed you still had your gardening gloves on with dirt on it.

“Oops, sorry!” you chuckled as you took it off and reached out again.

Again, he just looked at you with a straight face for a couple of seconds before finally speaking, “Look, I’m really busy, so if you don't mind.” He shut the door without giving you any chance to say anything back. You stood there in shock, replaying his British voice in your head. And as you stood there, you wondered why it is that he doesn't want to talk to you. The Charles couple across from your house were able to introduce themselves, and even got a smile from him. But for some reason, you could never get the same treatment.

—

Ian had proposed to Draco a housewarming party during lunch. Of course Draco had never been to one, much less hosted one.

“It’s alright, boss. I can fix all the arrangements up. All you gotta do is relax,” Ashley proposed. To say that Draco is extremely happy is an understatement. He had friends that actually enjoyed his company and not his influence. Not that he had much of that anyway.

America was really working out for him; work was great, people were nice, and the area he lived in was peaceful. Yes, he didn't like his neighbor, but she wasn't ruining his life in this new country. He just didn't like what she did.

“Thank you, Ashley. And you know you can just call me ‘Draco’.”

“I know,” she replied. Ashley grabbed her Blackberry phone and started drafting up an email, asking for his address so she could let people know where it would be. “Is this Friday a good time?”

“Yes, that should be fine. I don't have any plans that day.”

“Great, it's sent out to everyone in our department. Now if you'll excuse me, I have an attending to watch over for a surgery. See you guys later!” Draco, Blaine and Ian waved at Ashley as she left.

Blaine left soon after, leaving Ian with Draco. “Alright man, how’s it going on your street? Are you finally settled in?”

“I finally got the last of my things delivered from London yesterday. I was a bit nervous though. That mugg— I mean No-Maj neighbor of mine saw my mum’s owl in my yard. Thankfully, she didn't ask any questions,” Draco said as he cleared his lunch tray.

“Wait, you still use an owl? Ha, I didn’t think people still did,” Ian chuckled. “Well, of course I do. Do you not?”

“No, most wizards here in the States just use the usual ground post that No-Maj’s use. Things are a bit more modern around here. Speaking of your neighbor actually, have you ever spoken to her?”

Draco shrugged nonchalantly and said a simple ‘No’ when he really wanted to scrunch his nose and eyebrows in disgust and say ‘Fuck no.’ Ian, however, is gifted in Legilimens. He heard what Draco really meant but kept to himself. I guess things are different in the UK he thought.

—

“Hello my dear baby, I just wanted to call and give you a heads up; your brother and I are coming for Thanksgiving. He’s bringing Stephanie so do me a favor, please no witchy stuff.”

The voicemail played out loud in the kitchen. Please no witchy stuff. Your mother had repeatedly explained to you that she was okay with ‘it’ all, but growing up you never really got on the same page with her. And you knew it was because of your practice. Your younger brother would say comments every now and then when you grew up, but he always stood up for you when other people called you a ‘satanic freak’. But never once did you regret starting the Craft. You enjoyed it and it made you feel whole.

It had been a week since your encounter with your, now known British, neighbor. It bothered you a lot that he didn’t seem to want to get to know you. You were lost in your thoughts that you almost didn’t notice the doorbell going off. You answered the door and saw your neighbor.

“Hi dear, do you think you could help me and my husband with something?” Mrs. Charles smiled sweetly at you. “Of course, what can I do for you?”

“My grandson is coming in from Vermont, would it be alright if you could give us a ride to the airport? I’d ask Draco but he’s always busy at work and I don’t want to be a bother.”

Draco? “I’m sorry, who’s that?” you had a confused look.

“Our new neighbor, dear. I thought you had met him already. You two are the same age after all,” she informed you. Draco. How unique. You instantly recognized the name from the star constellation. It was nice to finally put a name to a face. Distracted again, Mrs. Charles waited for your answer, “Y/N? Can you do it?”

“O-oh, sorry. Of course I’ll help. Frankie was his name, correct?”

“Yes, it’s Frankie. Thank you so much. His flight comes in on Friday. I’ll see you then,” you wished her a good night and looked out your window to make sure she crossed the street safely. The rest of the night consisted of you and and your cat laying on your couch watching TV, but what was on the screen didn’t have your attention. Draco did. And you had no idea why.

—

“Dude, why do you not have a TV?” Blaine looked around Draco’s house and studied the arrangements he had. It was quite plain, almost minimalistic. Looking around, Draco couldn’t help but think how different it was from the Manor back in London. Instead of grand chandeliers, moving portraits of the Malfoy’s before him, and intricate designs on the walls, he had simple white walls with just one moving picture of him, Blaise and Theo a couple minutes before a Quidditch game against Ravenclaw. He had a bookshelf full of old school books from Hogwarts and some small relics he liked from the Manor.

“I’ve never had one growing up, and once I moved here I just never gave any second thought of it. Besides, what would I even watch?” Draco replied. Despite having one letter off from being the same name as his best friend, Blaine reminded Draco of Theo. They were both funny and outspoken. He would’ve loved for them to have met. They’d probably get on.

A few moments later, Ashley and Ian knocked on Draco’s door. The door was unlocked for them to be able to open the door. They looked around the living room before settling onto the couches. “Okay so I was thinking that we can just have some trays of snacks and desserts with some champagne. Does that sound good to you guys?” Ashley suggested. They just nodded along to whatever she said. She had gone to the store with Blaine to get everything prepared before the party tonight.

Ian looked at the pictures of Draco with his friends and one of his mother that laid on top of a chimney. “Do you still have lots of friends from Hogwarts?”

Draco thought about it, “You know, I actually didn’t have a lot of friends back in school. Back then, I only hung out with probably six people. But now it’s just two.” He sounded a bit sad, but figured that two were better than none.

“Do you think of what happened a lot?” Ian implied about that day at Hogwarts. He had been the only one that Draco trusted enough to tell. “Sometimes,” Draco gave a short reply. The action of opening up was still new to him, but he knew he shouldn’t wallow in it. Plus he’d rather have a friend instead of a doctor to talk about it.

Ian really felt bad for Draco. It must have been really traumatizing for someone to go through something like that at just the age of 17. Sure, Draco wasn’t the best person at the time. Who is he kidding, he was probably the biggest git in the whole school. It didn’t necessarily mean that he had to go through what he did. He lost one of his friends in a fire, and one left him after said friend died. Another left for no apparent reason. And another wanted something different in her life. Those things affected Draco, and probably will for the rest of his life.

He didn’t pity Draco, but was feeling sympathetic. “Well if it makes you feel any better, I don’t have much friends from Ilvermorny. It sucks now, but hey, down the line you get new ones.” Ian held a fisted hand out, waiting for Draco to bump it. It made him laugh as he bumped Ian’s fist.

Outside, Ian looked out to see a certain neighbor walk to her car. “Hey, is that that chick you were talking about?” Draco looked out the window and saw you grab some things out of your trunk and into your house. “Yeah, that’s her.” Ian never really pressed on Draco to explain why he didn’t like his No-Maj neighbor like he did the elderly couple across the street.

“Well, I gotta say. She’s a sight for sore eyes for a weirdo.” She’s a what? Beyond the nightly activities he had caught you doing on occasion in your bedroom, he never really looked at your face. Or really just at you. But now that Ian mentioned something, he started studying you. She’s not so bad looking— wait, what are you thinking?

By accident, Ian snorted at the words Draco thought. “Did… did I say that out loud?” Draco asked with suspicion in his voice. “No, I’m sorry. I don’t really mean to be invading your mind or anything. It runs in my family,” Ian laughed nervously.

“It’s okay. My godfather was also good at Legilimens and Occlumency. I’m pretty sure he’s heard worse during his classes. Come on, I’ll give you a full tour of the place.”

“If the other rooms are anything like the living room, I’m sure I’ve seen the whole place then,” Ian joked.

“Piss off.” As Ian walked towards the bathroom, Draco looked back outside to see you again. He watched as you helped the Charles couple in your car and drove off to Merlin knows where.

—

The party was rather fun. It lasted until almost 1 in the morning. He thanked Ashley for handling everything and spent the night talking and laughing with his colleagues. Once everyone left, he changed into comfortable sweats and a plain black t-shirt. Out on his bedroom window was Blaise’s owl with a sealed letter. He quickly opened the window, grabbed the letter and looked out to make sure no one was watching. Your room was dark and it seemed as the drapes were down. He guided his friends’ owl with his hands to a small, make-shift owl post against the fence that separated your yards. It had food and was enchanted to be at a comfortable temperature. His owl laid on one side of the post, resting as Blaise’s owl joined it.

Draco opened the letter and read its contents to himself.

Well mate, I’m glad you’re having a good time in America. There’s not much going on here in London. I’m just working at Gringotts until something opens up at the Ministry. Not really sure what I want to do, but I’ll figure it out. Anyways, I think you’ll be pleased to hear that Theo and I are going to be joining you for the holidays. Theo got a hold of a couple American muggle films and he figured that if the women there were as fit as the actresses, then you must be living the best life and he wants to join. As for that muggle neighbor of yours, I can’t wait to see her in person. We’ll see you, Malfoy.

From the corner of his eyes, he saw lights turn on in your room and your shadow walk around before turning off once more. Sorry Blaise, but there’s no way in hell you’ll meet her.

—

Frankie’s flight was delayed, causing you to get home so late. You were extremely tired and your feet and back were sore. Usually, you’d take a bath with some salts and oils to relax yourself, but tonight you were really lazy. So lazy that you just shook your shoes off and plopped yourself on the bed.

The second you hit the mattress, you dozed off. Your mind was wandering and found yourself dreaming.

You sat in your backyard in a pretty sundress. There was a slight breeze in the air and you held a cup of coffee in your hands. Someone sat at the chair opposite you and blocked the sun’s light in your face. You looked next to you and saw your friend smiling at you.

Draco.

—

next chp

(っ◔◡◔)っ taglist: @beiahadid @malfoy-styles-wife @fivenightslaughter @juneballoon999 @leydileyla

[makebank]

powerpuff girls

summary: bricks writing challenge!! you and your kook boys argue flirt over your costumes. @bricksatanakinswindow

warnings: cursing, drinking, hints/talk of smut

word count: 1.3k

a/n: so this is technically kelce x reader but is pretty much kook boys x reader. the readers just a lil catch and all the boys want her. i just thought it needed two gifs oops

“Happy Halloween!” You yell in excitement with a little shimmy as Kelce opens the front door. Your elation quickly deflates on sight of the tall boy. He’s too busy ogling your outfit to notice your blatant frown.

“Now that is hot,” he obliviously drools over you. “Kelce! What are you wearing?” He shoots you a puzzled look. You glare as you zone in on his bubblegum pink attire. You already knew what the two dimwits in the vacant house would be wearing. 

“Shit, y/n. I’m sorry. I completely forgot,” he scrambles to apologize for his innocent mistake. Weeks ago you and Kelce had decided to do a couples costume. He wasn’t your boyfriend or anything, but you were the closest with him out of the trio. It was a cheesy idea but you didn’t care. You two decided one extremely belligerent drunk night that he would be Hugh Hefner, which left you as a playboy bunny. The duo was definitely over done, but in your giddy intoxication it sounded like the best idea ever. You unintelligently assumed he would remember that conversation after that. 

You were left standing on Rafe’s front porch in your lonely lingerie costume. Your large bunny ears on display slightly tilted from your pout. Your tight black one piece hugging all your curves in the right places as your fishnet stockings lengthen your legs. Kelce still standing dumbfounded at your risqué wear and height from your sharp stilettos, you sigh and push past him into the house.

“Holy shit,” Rafe’s jaw falls to the floor as he smacks Topper’s chest to get his attention. Topper’s eyes widen once he realizes what Rafe’s fussing about. “Fuck me. What are you wearing y/n?” You huff at your other friends as they gawk at you, not being used to seeing you show yourself off.

“Well somebody was supposed to match with me, but it looks like the bros beat the hoe this time.” You side eye Kelce as he shuts the front door looking guilty. “I said it was my bad. I was fucked up y/n. Can you ever forgive me?” he begs with his soft eyes and puffed out lip. You always had a weak spot for the broad, sensitive rich-skinned boy. I mean look at him, he’s a tall drink of water and you were always thirsty for him. 

You pretend to mull it over, “I guess so. Anything for my favorite boy.” You wink at him and he instantly perks up. “Hey, what about us?” Topper sulks reeling for your attention. Rafe nods his head in agreement. “You know I love you all. C’mere,” as you motion grabby hands to your boys. They all eagerly wrap you in a group hug.

The boys did look amazing in color, so you couldn’t be too mad while eyeing them. Topper in his bright baby blue shade that brought out his eyes. He was definitely easy on the eyes, with his perfect smile and chiseled jawline. Rafe in a color that normally looked hideous on him was doing him wonders in a different shade. His seafoam green hue made him appear slightly evil, which gave you the chills. Him being Buttercup was fitting, since he was always a little grump. You weren’t sure how you got lucky with the smoking hot trio, but you were easily the main attraction tonight. Their toned and taut bodies had nothing on your wicked figure for the night.

“Now, when did you all decide to be the powerpuff girls?” you tease staring at their matching tight shirts, jeans, and color coordinated vans. They chuckle a little bit remembering the scene. Rafe has a smug look that tells you all you need to know, “Oh, it was just something that Maybank kid said.” Kelce high fives Topper, “It got us thinking about how cool we’d actually look, so here we are.” You narrow your eyes at their logic but decide it’s better not to ask questions.

“Before everyone gets here, shots?” Topper offers always being the first to initiate it. No one disagrees so he starts pouring double shots of vodka. “Doubles already? What are you guys trying to take advantage of me tonight?” you question jokingly scanning their faces.

They all laugh knowing they’d never. “Oh, we wouldn’t have to get you drunk for that. We know you’re dying to get us all in bed,” Rafe smirks sharing glances with the others. Kelce joins in, “All together, too.” And now they’re all doubled over trying to catch their breaths and stop the tears. You laugh along, but silently you know you wouldn’t say no to that. I mean just imagine. You shake your head to rid yourself of those impure thoughts of your friends. 

Topper whips out his snapchat and starts recording as you all down your first shot of the night cheering ‘trick or treat’ together. You love being lame with your best friends. Some people start to arrive, so you make your rounds kissing each of your kook boys on the cheek as you know you won’t see them the whole night. You linger on Kelce just a bit longer and he takes notice looking you up and down. 

Before they all run off you make once last pass at them, “Hm, guess I better go find my Hugh Hefner for the night?” They all instantly glare at you being considerably overprotective of any guy that comes near you. “Not a chance,” Rafe demands. “More like you’re our Hugh and we’re your house bunnies,” Topper lightens the mood but is still just as serious. Bubbles was a good selection for him. You ponder for a moment what they’d look like in a skimpy playboy outfit before Kelce interrupts. “If anyone’s gonna be your man for the night, it’s me.” Kelce was usually not one to speak up and make moves but that double shot apparently hit him. You all stare at him in shock from his confidence. As soon as the surprise wears off, you feel the heat rush through your body at his possession. Him being Blossom finally made sense as he took charge. 

“Is that right?” you play along to his sudden courageousness. He doesn’t miss a beat as he nods his head. It seems as if the others register what’s happening and jump to their defense. “Hey, no fair I called dibs in like 4th grade,” Topper whines. Rafe rolls his eyes. “Fuck your dibs. I’m clearly the hottest, so I win by default.” They all start arguing, something about ‘dibs being sacred’ and ‘who is the hottest’. Clearly you’ve thought about them all that way, but have always been scared to break up your group dynamic. How could you ever choose? But now with the way Kelce had been giving you attention and asserting himself, you may be ready to risk it. 

Nevertheless, for now you were fine with lowkey pining after them all as they did in return. You pour more shots during their debate and start handing them out as a distraction. “To my playboy bunnies?” They all sincerely smile at you and repeat your toast as you clink glasses.

Just as your finishing, the pogue clique saunters in. JJ takes one look at your group as he’s rendered speechless, before they all burst out laughing. “So your boys took my advice to heart, huh?” the blond boasts. You nod your head with a giant grin at how cute they looked, “yeah, it was kind of perfect for them.” JJ decides to be his charming self and take a chance, “You look kind of perfect for me.” You shake your head, he could never pass up a good pick up line and chance to rile up the others. 

You mouth ‘smooth’ at him as the trio surrounds him ready to fight like always. You take this as your cue to leave. “I’m gonna do my rounds. Have fun boys,” you strut off into the now full swing party. You leave the boys who all have a special place for you in their heart to sort out their own problems, as you go find more trouble to stir up. Halloween always did bring out the wild side in everyone. 

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