#i for reals cried when gaming's dad showed up on the bridge at the end omg

[echollama]

Lantern Rite 2024 doodles!

This year's event hit a bit close to home for me personally, and I loved it🥰🥰🥰

[jloves-pp]

The Story of Merida and Hiccup part 5

Chapter 5-Touch the sky

Hiccup yawned as he was cooling a hot piece of met into a bucket of water. He have up early to remake Toothless's tail fin, he did this so less people would see and question him. Hiccup had been at DunBroch for four days and Merida was able to have a tent set up. She also asked for Blacksmith tools and equipment, Hiccup did wonder how to thank her for anything she done from him and Toothless.

He place the already cooled piece flat on table before watching over his drawings, seeing if anything needs changing.

"Hiccup? You're in it?" Hiccup turned to see Merida walking in with tray for fruits, bread and cheese.

"Hey, sorry about missing breakfast with your family" Hiccup said as Merida gave he the plate.

"No, it's understandable, mum is more worry about you being hungry" Merida explained smiling as she crossing her arms as Hiccup took a bite of bread. "mum wanted the services to send some food but I suggested I'll make it, annnd I brought a wee treat for late" and she then placed the sweet cake next to Hiccup.

"Thank you" Hiccup said then added "did you make this cake"

"No"

"Oh that's ok. Just wanted to sure it doesn't turn me into a bear"

Merida couldn't help but laugh at the joke, she should had seen that coming. Her eye then fell upon Hiccup's drawing, she didn't understand them but she known what they were.

"Are these the designs from the tail?" Merida asked.

"Yeah" Hiccup replied as he joined Merida "I drew from what would left, added what would broken and did some minor changes that need alternates. I just need to make two more picses and saw up the leather for the fin and then we're good to go"

"Hic, if it's ok with you. Would you mind if I sew the fin for you" Merida asked him. She was surprised about her offering to help for she haven't done something like that for before.

"You sew?" Hiccup said in surprised, Hiccup thought Merida couldn't sew for what she told him. So this was a real shock.

"Aye I do" Merida said crossing her arms.

"Sorry, sorry it's just I never thought of you as the sewing tape" he quickly approaches, rubbing his neck.

"Well, there are somethings you need to learn as a princess and sewing is one. She replied reassured him "Who do you think made this dress" she added showing him the puffs on her sleeves.

"Oh you did? That's really impressive, I really like it" Hiccup said honestly.

"Thank you, it's better for archery" Merida answered proudly. No one ever complained her dress that she made, hearing Hiccup like it made her happy.

"Well If I draw it out and write the measurements then you can do while I try to finish these metal pieces" Hiccup expected at a moment "now where's that pencil?" And he searched for it among the papers.

Merida looked as well until she spotted one under a pices of paper "there's one" she said and they both reached and grabbed it. Merida got there first and Hiccup's hand was on top of Merida. The two frozen and they faces turned pink, there was that straight feeling again. They been having this feeling for a while, mostly when they hands touch. Hiccup and Merida looked at each other, not knowing what to do.

Hiccup's mind became scrambled, thinking of a hundred way to apologised. Merida meanwhile wanted to say something but nothing came out. Eventually they moved their hands with Merida still holding the pencil.

"I'm sorry. No, I was my.." Both of them said at the same and then the two started laughing lightly together with help get rid of the awkward moment.

"Here" Merida said and handed Hiccup the pencil.

"Thank you" Hiccup replied taking it from her. "I'll start scratch it out now and give it to you it once it's done" Merida was about to say there was no rush when they heard someone yelled at the top of their lungs.

"Right, I had enough of you three. Come back here" The teens peeked out of the test to see Maudie running after the Triplets which Harris wearing a maid dress, holding it up as he ran while Hubert and Hamish were a bucket all of cakes.

"There they go again" Merida said grinning, watching her brothers disappearing around the corner with poor Maudie behind them.

"Do they do this all the time" Hiccup asked closing the certain.

"Aye, they at less pinch a treat or two as day. We surely would worry if they haven't" Merida told him lening against the table.

"Oh, has their crimes mostly cakes based or do they do other operations?" Hiccup asked as he walk back to the table.

"Well, they know for the odd prank or two. They had started big fights during clans meetings and of course they did help me with getting mum out of the castle" Merida said smirking that the countless prank and trick they pulled off. She then noticed Hiccup food, it was hardly touch it. Then saw Hiccup head down, sketching away in deep concentration. "Maybe we should have a break, you been busy all morning. Why not have lunch by the archery field while I do some practice"

Hearing Merida suggest made Hiccup pause. He was determined to finish the tail but he do feel tired and hungry. He really needed a break.

"You know, that's not a bad idea" he finally replied looking up the the Redhead"

"Good. I'll get my bow and quiver and meet you there" Merida said smile happily before heading to the opening.

"Err..where is the archery field again" Hiccup asked sheepishly. He still didn't know where places would and he hasn't been to the game field yet.

"You turn right toward the arch way and it's on the other side of the bridge" Merida explained. "Ok meet you there" and gave Hiccup a small smile before leaving.

The young Viking tidy up, collected his lunch and walked to the field. He couldn't help but think DunBroch was quite similar to Berk as he walked across the bridge. Not only the bridge but the forests, the food and the people remind him of home. Hiccup started to feel a bit home sick and wonder how his dad was doing.

"Ha, look at that gangly lad. He looks like a scarecrow" Hiccup heard a loud voice yelling. He looked up to see a group of men laughing they heads off. "I don't think the crows won't be scared of him" and laughed even more.

Hiccup was use to people making fun and calling names before he met Toothless. All know he would brush it off, deep inside it did upset him. The insults disappeared and everyone says genuine good things to Hiccup. Hearing these terrible words, brought back bad memories he thought they were buried down. Pretending he haven't heard them, Hiccup kept walking until he spotted some targets.

Hiccup sat against one of the target and ate the rest of his lunch, after eating he fell asleep. Hiccup didn't know how long he was but he felt something tickling on his nose, this cost him to sneeze which woken him.

"What the..." He managed to said. he then heard giggling, Hiccup looked up and Merida covering her mouth with one hand and had a arrow in the other.

"Sorry. I couldn't resist" Merida expected. Hiccup soon figured in out. Merida used the featured end of her arrow to tickling his nose.

"Ha,ha very funny" Hiccup said sarcastically but good natured. "I have to get me own back"

Merida grinned at this "we'll see" she said "now, for some practice" and she took her bow off the shoulder and pull one of the arrow out of the quither. "Would you like to try?" Merida then asked offering the arrow.

"Err no, I'm good" Hiccup insisted "if I did, I probably end up shooting someone in the eye"

Merida wanted him to have a go but she didn't want to force anyone into anything that makes them uncomfortable.

"Ok, how about I do some and you watch, then when you ready. You can have a go" Merida suggested putting one of hands on her hip.

"Ok, sounds good" Hiccup replied. Pretty soon. Arrows were flying from the Scottish princess, hitting bullseyes every time. Hiccup was really impressed. He heard about Merida's archery skills from her story and how he heard from her family. Seeing her putting back and then letting her arrow go. Hiccup was mesmerised. He then began to sketch Merida in his book, he made sure that all the angles, her stance and how to she hold her bow, he wanted to draw her right. He seemed to draw Merida's face longer. There was nothing wrong with his drawing faces but doing Merida's was different, maybe he wanted to make it perfect or maybe something else.

After Merida had her seventh round, she notice Hiccup drawing in his book. Curious, she walked up to him then asked "What are you drawing?" Hiccup nearly jumped out of his skin and he quickly slammed his book shut.

"Er, er. Nothing, nothing. You would find it boarding" Hiccup stuttered, his face turning red. Merida did though about asking again but decided against it.

"Ok. It's your turn" she said and handed him her bow. Reluctantly Hiccup took the bow and then stood in front of the target. He loaded the arrow, shut his eyes and was about to shot.

"You're doing it all wrong" Merida shouted seeing how Hiccup held himself, his arrow wouldn't go too far.

"I know" Hiccup admitted clutching the bow "I never was good at it, wielding anything for that matter"

She sighed and walked up to help him. "Here, I'll show you" she said more softly helping him to ready the bow. "First, you need to open your eyes and you head need to keep your head forward, You need to see where you aiming" she moved his head to the right direction. "Then you need to relax especially on your shoulder" she then added. Hiccup rolled his shoulder, breathing a few times. "Now pull your arrow to your check, then focus on your target then release.

Hiccup pulled the arrow, looking at target. He hoped the arrow would at least hit the target. With one last breath, he released the arrow. It soared beautiful and hit right in the bull eyes.

"I..I did it, i did it" Hiccup cried in disbelief. He couldn't wipe the smile "I actually hit it"

Merida clapped and cheered for Hiccup "see, I knew you would do it" and punched slightly on Hiccup's arm.

The young boy didn't mind it for he was too happy to care. That is until a chorus of laughs echoed behind them.

"That boy sounds like a goose" one of the men shouted.

"Maybe he was one in another life" said another men and began honking and acted like a goose while his friends laughed.

The princess looked over to Hiccup, to see him trying to hide his sadness. She remembered his story from the other day, he mentioned that he was picked on a lot mostly for his appearance.

Merida's blood boiled as she turned back to the men who were still laughing their heads out. "How dare they said horrid things to him" Merida though as she stormed over to them.

Hiccup finally managed to pull himself together. He was just about to ask if they could leave but he glanced to find Merida marching up to the laughing men who weren't laughing when they saw the princess.

"May I ask, what happens to be so funny?" She asked with her hand on her hip.

"Well er..." They said, not as confident as before " well we never seen this odd boy before, we just having a joke..." One manage to say. Merida only glared at their terrible excuse.

"He happens to be my dear friend and if I heard one more heartless comment. You'll have a lot of time of thinking in the dungeons" she added which drained the colour off their faces.

"But princess is only a joke" one of the man pleaded but the Scottish princess wasn't buying it.

"Well if you still assist. How about getting my mother opinion on this"

"No! No! Please don't being the queen" they pleaded now their face turn white as snow then one man suddenly said " I...I heard my wife called me" for this the other men chorused...

"Oh yes"

"Me too"

"Just remembered I need to find my sheep"

Merida watched them huddled away with their tails between their legs.

Hiccup didn't know what to say. No one not even his father ever stud up for him, Also he admired that her fearless and her wit. He wished he have someone like Merida around when he was younger.

"I don't think they going to bother you again" Merida said reassuring when she walked back. To her surprised to see Hiccup look unsure.

"What's wrong?"

The young boy was brought out of his thoughts "Oh nothing, it just...thank you" he said smiling happily

"You're welcome" Merida replied relieved he was alright. "they're lucky I didn't try a new fight move my dad taught me"

"Oh what is it?" Hiccup asked

"He called it the head squisher, I could show you how it works" Merida suggested

"And now I regret asking, no I good. I wouldn't want to...what I mean is..is" Hiccup began is fumble.

"It's fine" Merida replied understanding "I'll show you some other time. Now we have a tail to finish "

"Hey but hope you don't know if we get fresh drinks" Hiccup asked as headed back to castle.

"Yes, it really warm today. I like a drink as well" Merida agreed.

As the teens walks, they didn't know they had been watched. Elinor, who was doing some royal duties where she saw the two, she saw them doing archery and saw Merida telling the men out about Hiccup. Elinor smile at them, it was nice seeing her daughter having a friend for Merida only real friend was Angus. She continued watching them as they disappeared before Elinor went to finsh her job.

The next day, Hiccup was headed to meet Toothless, carrying a newly made tail fin. He and Merida working tirelessly the rest of that afternoon until they finally finished the tail, Hiccup was dying to test it right away but it was getting dark so they planned the test tomorrow. Merida needed to help her dad with training some new guards, Hiccup said it was fine and Merida told him she'll catch up with him when she can.

"Hey Toothless" he cried when he saw his best friend drinking the water from the river. Toothless instantly ran and circle happy around his friend. "Hey, ok I'm happy to you" he put one hand around his dragon's neck. "Well, what do you think?" He asked and show Toothless the tail.

Seeing his night fury's toothless smile and his purring, Hiccup knew Toothless like it.

"Yeah it really cool. You know, I'm surprised how good Mer was at metal work. Even know she never done it before" Hiccup then said looking at the tail fin. As they make the fin yesterday, Hiccup taught Merida how to make metal, to bend it and everything he knows. Merida mostly done the sewing while Hiccup did the metal work but Merida did help him when he asked she.

He remembered Merida telling him a funny story when they were working. It was about his dad and a blueberry pie that end up he having a blue moustache for a week. He is though that Merida has a sweet laugh and was a wonderful storytelling.

Hiccup then noticed Toothless giving him a look.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Hiccup asked raising an eyebrow. Toothless answered by directly looking at the tail, The young Viking wasn't sure at first but then it clicked.

"No,no Toothless, she's the princess of my deadly emeries. It couldn't be anything more. Even having her as a friend as bad" Hiccup explained, he signed heavy and burned his face in his hand. Toothless walk up to his friend side, gave a small purred of apologise. Hiccup peeped toward his fingers and showed his dragon a small smile to him

"It's ok bud" Hiccup reassured Toothless "It just becoming so complicated the long we stay. If Merida knew the true she..."

"What are you talking about?" Hiccup quickly turned to see Merida holding the saddle with Angus beside.

"Merida!" Hiccup said blessing, trying to think what to say "I was telling Toothless about your dad and that pie that made him blue" he laughed weakly. he felt awful, he hated lying to her.

Merida could see Hiccup grow palm when he talk. She wanted the question him more but she shrugged and let it go.

"Hey Toothless I got something for you" she said before she looked forward her bag. The Night fury instantly perked up, hoping it was fish."it's not salmon but hope it's still tasty" and pull out a very long eel.

Toothless growth and narrow his eyes which made Merida confused

"Oh Mer, dragons really don't fond of eels" Hiccup quickly expected as he tried to clan the Night Fury down.

"Oh I'm sorry" she said understanding now and toss it away as hard as she could. Toothless immediately softened when eel disappeared "That mite be good to know if dragons suddenly attack us. We'll just launched eels at them"

Hiccup couldn't help but laugh at the thought" yeah, I really want to see that now"

Merida join with him "oh I brought this" she said after finishing laughing and held up the saddle.

"Oh I absolutely forget, Thank you" Hiccup said and gently took saddle. His hand brush against Merida's hand and that cause the two to bless. They wasn't sure if they knew but Toothless and Angus could sense chemistry between the two human.

Hiccup and Merida quickly step away before their blessings got worst. Merida went to check on her horse just as Hiccup began putting the saddle on Toothless. It didn't help Hiccup, seeing Toothless giving him a knowing look.

"Not a word" Hiccup murmured warning. It didn't take long for Hiccup to fastened the saddle and the tail fin on his friend, Merida in the meantime led her horse to the river for a drink while she brush him "ok, we're all set" Merida turned to see Toothless suited up.

"You do look quite handsome, don't you Lad" Merida said to Toothless when the dragon hopped over to the princess. She gently scratch underneath Toothless's neck who purred and gave a lick Merida's check, causing the princess a laugh hard.

Hiccup was made up seeing Merida and Toothless bonding. She was a true dragon ride, not judge Toothless or himself at first sight plus He did like her fiery spirit. Toothless then hopped back to Hiccup and licked all over Hiccup face.

"Toothless" He laughed trying to stop his dragon "you wanted to go flying, didn't you" he then asked and Toothless nodded. "Ok we'll head up and test the tail out"

"Can I come with you?" Merida asked. She did wanted to fly on Toothless for a long time since Hiccup told his story. It sounded fun and exciting.

Hiccup hesitate at first, he wasn't used to someone wanted to ride Toothless but seeing her blue eyes bright up and knowing it wouldn't been in the air for long.

"Yes, just make sure to hold on" Hiccup said as he climbed on to his dragon's back.

Wasting no time, Merida hugged Angus, rush over and climb on behind Hiccup as he hooded his leg into the special pedal that control the tail fin.

"You're ready" Hiccup said to Toothless and before Merida knew it, they launched into the air. Merida gasped, shit her eyes and grabbed on to Hiccup's shoulders as they climbed higher and higher. Merida felt the rush of wind against her checks, it wasn't until she felt the wind slow down. Slowly, she opened her eyes and took in the sight. She always imagine what was it would be like to fly but this was better that she thought. the highlands that Merida knew so well, looks so different from above.

Hiccup smile when he looked over to Merida, seeing to wonder on her face. They happened to fly above DunBroch Castle and looked like model and fingers of people from where they were.

Inside the castle, Elinor was looking forward some letters as she past by window. She glanced over and halted, the queen had noticed something black among the cloud. Judging by the shape, it looked like a dragon but it quickly disappeared. Elinor pause for a moment. Did she see what though or what's it just her imagination.

Merida breath in as they glide through the clouds, she reached out and tried to feel cloud.

"Enjoy the view, Mer?" Hiccup asked.

"Yes. This is the most incredible thing I ever done." Merida answered happily "thank you and thank you too Toothless" and softly patted the dragon on his side which Toothless gave the princess a small smile.

"How about we take it up a notch" Hiccup then said, an idea just popped into his head.

"Ow like what?" Merida replied feeling a little excited

Hiccup lowered the whispered to Toothless "ok, let's show her what we can do" Toothless smirk at this and then shot downward. Merida's hair was flying behind as she cluck on tight to Hiccup. He bless lightly by this but he need to concentrate. Just as they near the ground, they flew by up again. Hiccup did think Merida was going to tell them out but instead, she laughed. Toothless began spinning so quick, everything become a blur.

"Isn't this great" Hiccup shouted as they spurned.

"Yes this is the most exciting thing I even done" she replied and scream with joy. She love flying fast and feel the wind in her hair. After they stop spinning, they found a ravine and show Merida how they dodge and move toward it. Soon the sun was setting as the teens and Toothless gentle glide around the mountains

"Well I can say the tail working. We should probably head back now" Hiccup said seeing how late it was getting.

"No" Merida suddenly said then added more softly " just...just a wee bit long. I really enjoying the view" Hiccup looking out and saw what she meant. The glow of the sun makes the meadows, the forsets,the rivers and the mountains a mystical feel to them.

"Yeah me too" he agreed. The two shared a warm smile before looking over again. Enjoying this beautiful moment as long as they could.

[sweetiepie08]

RebelZ Chapter 6

Invader Zim fanfic

While analyzing Zim’s PAK for weaknesses, Tak discovers strange coding that sends her on a search for answers. The clues lead her to uncover a conspiracy that governs all of Irken society. When the truth sends her on the run, she has no choice but to return to the one place the Tallest would never willingly go: Urth.

Meanwhile, Dib has noticed odd changes in Zim’s behavior. Has the invader simply grown bored of his mission over the last few years, or is there something more interesting going on?

People who asked to be tagged: @incorrect-invader-zim , @messinwitheddie, @reblogstupids, @cate-r-gunn, @agentpinerulesall​

If anyone else would like to be added to the tag list feel free to message me. Also, if you’re on the tag list and you changed your name, please just let me know.

Chapter 1. Chapter 2. Chapter 3. Chapter 4. Chapter 5. Chapter 6. Chapter 7.  Chapter 8.  Chapter 9. Chapter 10.

[-]

Dib flipped through the streaming services, looking for something to watch. The documentary had ended, pizza had been eaten, and Gaz had gone upstairs to fix some emergency with one of her online gaming groups. He knew he had surveillance tapes waiting for him on his desk, (or worse, college applications) but he wasn’t ready to check up on them just yet. He was actually enjoying some downtime for once, and he didn’t want it to end.

Then, he heard the all-too-familiar sounds of an alien spaceship landing outside.

Nope, he thought as he hit play on whatever show he landed on. Didn’t matter what, so long as he could pretend he couldn’t hear what was going on in his driveway.

Some muffled arguing came from the front door, followed by the bell ringing. Dib turned up the volume. Not getting out of this chair.

Loud pounding began, accompanied by cries of “Dib-human! Open this door!” Dib turned the volume up as loud as it would go as the pounding continued.

“Jesus Christ, Dib!” Gaz shouted from upstairs. “Just answer the door!”

“Fine!” Dib shut off the tv and stalked to the front door. When he opened it, he found two Irken idiots.

Zim and Tak hung off each other and drank from plastic bottles while their robot pets bolted right in and made themselves at home. “Hey, you grew into your head,” Tak said, lazily pointing her claw at him.

“You know, Dib, there’s a lot of reasons to hate your planet,” Zim slurred, letting himself in. “You keep chihuahuas as pets, some of you refuse to inoculate against deadly diseases, and that Game of Thrones finale was garbage! But at least you don’t need identification to buy gingzor, and that almost makes up for it.” Zim punctuated his short rant by taking a long swig from his bottle.

“And look,” Tak said, pulling a box of ginger snaps out of a plastic shopping bag, “they had edibles.”

“Are you guys drunk? What is this?” Dib grabbed the bottle out of Zim’s hands. He checked the label, gave it a sniff, and took a small taste. Yup, it was exactly what the label said it was. “This is just ginger ale.”

“Eee-yup,” Zim said, swiping his bottle back. “Your light brews aren’t as potent as the ones we’ve got on Irk, but it gets the job done.”

“Wait, are you guys seriously telling me your species gets drunk off ginger?”

“Why?” Tak asked, shoving a cookie in her mouth. “What do humans consume when they want to forget the futility of existence?”

“Uh, alcohol, usually.”

The two Irkens locked eyes, then burst into laughter. “Seriously?” Tak squealed, wiping a tear from her eye. “That’s an antiseptic.”

“Humans really are stupid,” Zim agreed.

“Not that kind,” Dib grumbled, knowing he would be ignored. Then he felt his temper boil. “What are you two doing in my house?!”

“Oh yeah,” the two brushed past him and hopped on the couch like they owned the place. “We need to crash here for a while,” Zim explained. He turned on the tv, got blasted by an old episode of The Office, then turned the volume down.

“Why?”

“We uncovered a conspiracy behind the Irken empire and our government tried to kill us.”

“I discovered,” Tak corrected. “They just caught you harboring me.”

“Eh, details.”

“The point is,” Tak went on, “we’re both marked as traitors and we need to lay low for a while.”

Dib could have sworn his ears perked like a dog’s. An intergalactic conspiracy? There was a story here so juicy he could almost taste it. Still, as he watched the earth’s total Irken population spill ginger ale on the couch and grind crumbs into the cushions, the only question on his mind was, “why here?”

“Need your lab,” Zim tossed off as if it should have been obvious.

“So? Why don’t you go back to your base and use your own lab?”

“Can’t.” Zim took a teal cube out of his pocket and tossed it in Dib’s direction.

Dib caught it and brought it up to his eye to inspect. “What’s this?”

“My base.”

“Your whole base is in this?” Dib strained his eyes, looking at the cube. “What’s going on? How did this even happen?”

“How far back in Irken history do you want to go?” Tak asked, popping open a bottle.

“Wait, you mean you’re actually going to tell me?”

She gave a non-committal shrug. “Eh…”

“Hold on, wait right there.” Dib zipped upstairs to his room, grabbed a notebook, pen, and recorder, then zipped back down. He grabbed a chair, hit record, and poised his pen. “Let’s start at the beginning.”

[-]

Dib scribbled furiously, trying to keep up with Tak’s slurred ramblings. Zim interjected occasionally to add something or explain an Irken concept, but it was clear exactly who the conspiracy hunter was.

“So, anyway, that’s when I realized this parasite has been controlling our entire society for generations and, you know, it’s just a real buzzkill to find out you’re basically living food.”

“I see,” Dib said, making a note to ask about this library planet later (maybe get coordinates?). “And this parasite has been masquerading as the Control Brains.”

“Not ‘masquerading’ exactly,” she explained. “They always were the Control Brains.”

“And, just to make sure I got this, the Control brains are what, again?”

Before they could answer, he heard a loud “eh-he-eh-hm.” He looked over to see Gaz standing in the kitchen doorway. When he met her eyes, she curled one finger, ominously beckoning him over. “Uh, one second, guys.” He put down his pen and followed Gaz into the kitchen.

“Make this quick, Gaz,” he said, peaking back into the living room. “These two are giving me everything.”

“Okay then,” she said, her voice displaying her irritation. “Just answer me this: why are there two destructive aliens drinking like civil war amputee patients on our couch?”

“Revealing their government’s secrets, that’s what,” he answered with unbridled glee. “Turns out, ginger gets them drunk and when they’re drunk, they have no filter. They’ve been rambling on and on about their creepy big-brother-like society for an hour now. Look at all these notes.” He shoved the notebook in Gaz’s face and flipped furiously through the pages. “As long as I keep them drunk and happy, they’ll keep talking. Which reminds me…” He took out his wallet, grabbed a bill, and handed it to Gaz. “Go to the store and buy them out of ginger ale. We can’t let them sober up.”

“Five bucks?” Gaz said, wrinkling her nose. “I assume you’re planning on reimbursing me for the grocery bill later.”

“This isn’t about money, Gaz.”

“Then dig a little deeper, Scrooge. I know your part-time at Dad’s lab pays more than this.”

“And you make plenty off of your twitch gaming streams,” Dib argued. “Come on, this is about furthering human knowledge.”

Gaz raised her eyebrow in her ‘you’ve got to be kidding’ way. “You’re offering me $5 to drop everything, go to the store, and buy out their entire supply of ginger ale without reimbursing me for the bill.”

“Uh…yes?”

She scoffed. “Get a pulse.”

Dib pinched the bridge of his nose and rubbed the corners of his eyes. Was she seriously arguing with him about money at a time like this? “Look, what if I give you an acknowledgement when I publish this baby? Like, say, in the forward?”

“You mean the part no one reads?”

“Uh…”

Gaz let out an exasperated huff and looked into the living room at the two Irkens. “So, they’ll really ramble on and on if you stuff them full of ginger, huh? About anything?”

“Yeah, pretty much. We managed to stay on topic so far. I mean, Zim did go on a tangent about the Game of Thrones finale, but we got back on track.”

Gaz smiled. “Did he, now? About what?”

“Something about Westeros crumbling as soon as the credits rolled. I don’t know. You watched that show, not me.”

“Hmm…” Gaz murmured, looking pointedly at Zim. Oh no, she was thinking… Worse! She was plotting!

“Gaz? What are you doing?”

She threw him a wicked smirk and sauntered into the living room. “Hey, Zim!” she called, clear as a bell. “That Game of Thrones finale sucked, right?”

“Don’t even get me started, Dib-sister!” Zim called back, slapping his hand on the couch. “Zim has never seen such a staggering drop in quality!”

Dib dropped his face into his hands. Was it too late to offer a twenty?”

[-]

“I guarantee Dorne and the Iron Islands rebelled as soon as they stepped out of the Dragon Pit.” Zim said, splashing ginger ale on the couch with every gesture. “I’ll bet they only voted ‘yes’ on Bran because this would be the easiest reign to overthrow.”

“Exactly!” Gaz said, slapping the arm of her chair. “Dany promised Yara independence two seasons ago. There’s no way she’s just going to watch him hand his sister a kingdom and not demand what’s owed to her.”

Dib twisted the notebook in his hands as he listened to them rant. They’d been at this since Gaz brought up the subject.

“And what was with them acting like Dany was in the wrong for executing Varys?” Zim added. “He tried to assassinate her!”

“As if Jon didn’t execute a child a few seasons ago for the same thing. And it was obvious that kid was coerced into it by the higher-ranking Night’s Watch men.” Gaz said. “You’ll notice Dany didn’t execute the child Varys manipulated into poisoning her. And he only thought she was ‘mad’ because she stopped listening to his shitty advice.”

“Their ‘advice’ lost her the Dornish forces, the Iron Fleet, and Highgarden’s armies,” Zim agreed.

“Plus another dragon and her best friend. And when she goes into mourning, he’s all ‘Welp, she’s clearly gone mad. Time to put her down like Old Yeller.’ Oh! And what was with Tyrion’s ‘everywhere she goes, evil men die’ speech? Like that’s a bad thing? Yeah, I know. That’s why I liked her.”

“You know wat she should have done?” Zim said. “She should have flown her three dragons to the Red Keep like she wanted to do last season. She could have taken the city with fewer casualties.”

Gaz nodded in agreement. “Maybe even no casualties if King’s Landing surrenders immediately.”

“Then she’d have all three dragons and all the armies in the Seven Kingdoms to fight the White Walkers with!” Zim added.

“Yeah, then maybe there’d be enough time to make the army of the dead live up to the hype! Nice Long Night. Lasted about six hours.”

“What is this show?” Tak asked. “I want to watch.”

“Enough!” Dib burst, jumping out of his seat. “Enough Game of Thrones! If you want to keep complaining, go on the internet and do it! Now can we please get back to you two spilling the secrets of your evil intergalactic empire!”

“There are no more secrets, human,” Tak snapped. “We’ve told all. The only other information I could find is on this.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a square, plastic information drive. “But this technology is too outdated to decode. So, unless you have access to an ancient computer…”

Dib took the square and held it up to his eyes. “This just looks like a floppy disc.”

“Really, Dib-beast?” Zim scoffed. “Your planet’s technology is antiquated, but it’s not that archaic.”

“Actually, that’s pretty outdated for us too,” Gaz said, “but our dad’s got a computer graveyard in the attic. Maybe we can get one of those to work.”

Tak regarded the disc suspiciously. “You’re serious? You think you might be able to get it to work.”

“It could be possible,” Dib answered, eyeballing the disc. It looked about the right size and shape. It may at least fit into the disc drive. “It wouldn’t be the first time we’ve gotten Irken and Earth technology to work together. It’s worth a shot.”

[-]

After about an hour and a few trips to the attic, they found an old monitor and hard drive they managed to turn on. As the computer booted up, they compared the Irken disc drive to a standard floppy disc. Dib was right. They seemed to match up.

“You really think this has a shot?” Tak asked again. She looked skeptical they whole time the were getting set up, but as the computer whirred to life, Dib thought he could detect a hint of hope in her voice.

“It could,” Gaz answered. “If the magnetic polarity is the same as we use on earth, the computer might be able to read the disc.”

Dib nodded along. While he was good with technology, his area of expertise was more on the engineering side. Gaz was the one with an affinity for coding.

Once the computer was ready, they popped in the drive. They all gathered around the monitor and held their breath. A buffering window popped up on the screen and they let out a collective gasp.

After a few minutes, the picture went black and green Irken text scrolled up across the screen, accompanied by, what sounded to Dib, like a series of chirps, clicks, and hisses. “Um, is it supposed to be making that-”

Tak and Zim threw a sharp hiss in his direction, then went back to staring intently at the screen. When Dib quieted and listened harder, he realized the sounds came from an organic voice and had a deliberate pattern. Holy shit, it’s reading the text! This is their language!

The voice stopped and the screen froze on another set of Irken symbols.

“Oh, my…” Zim choked out, eyes still glued to the screen. “We’ve got to write that down!”

“MiMi,” Tak commanded, “my tablet.”

“Wait, what was that?” Dib asked as he watched the two aliens scramble to scribble down the symbols on the screen. “Was that guy speaking Irken? What did they say?”

“Yes,” Zim answered. “And those are coordinates to the next place we need to go.”

“You mean, I need to go,” Tak cut in. “I’m the one who uncovered the conspiracy, remember?”

Zim scowled and stomped up to her, getting in her face. “You made this my problem when you crashed at my house, drank all my gingzor, and got my base cubified.”

“Why would I ever team up with you?” she shot back.

“I’m every bit as Irken as you are,” Zim argued. “I deserve answers as much as you.”

“Will someone please tell me what that thing said?” Dib shouted. The two stopped their bickering long enough to cast him an icy stare.

“Well,” Dib growled impatiently. If these two thought they were going to force their way into his home, spill ginger ale on his couch, tell him about an intergalactic conspiracy, and not let him in on the details, they had another thing coming.

“This doesn’t concern you, human,” Zim snapped.

“You two waltzed in here expecting me to hide you form your creepy totalitarian government and let you use my lab. Unless you want me to throw you out on your ass…”

“Fine, fine,” Tak said, waving an arm dismissively. “That voice claimed to be Krislotch. He confirmed that he left the clues that lead me to discover the truth about the Control Brains. He also claims more information is waiting on a planet at those coordinates. I must go there next if I want to solve this mystery.”

“We must go there,” Zim but in.

“This is my conspiracy, Zim,” Tak growled, turning back to him. “If there are more answered waiting on that planet, I will be the one to find them.”

“Oh yeah?” he said with a smirk. “How you gonna get there? I’m the only one with a working ship.”

“Dib’s got a ship,” Gaz chimed in. She turned to Tak. “Actually, I think it’s your ship.”

“You!” Before Dib could say anything, Tak had already jumped on the coffee table and grabbed his collar. “You have my ship?!”

“Uhh…”

“Take me to her!”

[-]

“wha-wha…WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!”

They group stood in the garage and stared at the collection of barely-held-together parts, also known as Tak’s ship. Dib had to admit, his last few forays into space hadn’t exactly been smooth sailing.

“It doesn’t look like this all the time,” he tried explaining. “I’ve gotten it to work. But, you know, sometimes things happen… and when they happen, I have to convince the ship to let me fix it again.”

“And why is she blue?”

“Um… I like blue?”

“Stupid human!” Tak spat, rushing up to her ship. “You have no idea what you’ve been toying with!”

“Fine,” Dib grumbled under his breath. “Only repaired it multiple times of the last six years but whatever…”

“Ship,” Tak commanded, laying a hand on the ship’s windshield. “Respond.”

“Biosignature detected,” the ship said as it began to light up. “You are Tak.”

“Yes, yes, ship! It’s me!” she cried. Dib could almost swear there were tears in her eyes.

“Hmpf, what took you so long?”

Tak looked taken aback. “I was, uh, had a lot going on, you know? Schemes and such?”

“And you never once thought to check in on your ship?”

“When I have to eject, I thought I’d lost you forever,” Tak explained, pressing both hands on the windshield. “I never wanted to leave you behind, but I’m here now. I can take you back.”

“Hey, wait a minute…” Dib protested. He started forward, but Gaz pulled him back.

“It’s her ship, dummy.”

“And how exactly did you get here?” Ship went on.

Tak hesitated. “Well, I…”

“I knew it,” Ship huffed. “You have a new ship now, don’t you?”

“It’s not like that,” Tak insisted. “Yes, I needed a new ship to get around, but I swear, it was a simple matter of transport. That ship means nothing to me. I would trade every other ship in the universe for you.”

The ship went quiet, as if thinking it over. Dib found himself oddly captivated, like when he’d accidently get sucked into his grandmother’s soap operas. He quickly shook himself out of it. This is ridiculous. She’s talking to a ship.

“I don’t know what to believe,” Ship finally said.

“I promise, Ship, I will fix you myself and, after that, I will never even look at another ship again.” She gently caressed its side and the engines purred.

“I will allow you to repair me, for now. After that, perhaps I can allow you to pilot me again, in time.”

Tak smiled and continued to pet her ship while it continued to purr. The scene was almost sweet until Zim decided to break it up.

“Well, well, well,” Zim said, a smug smile on his face, “looks like I’m the only one here with an operational ship.”

Tak only hissed in response.

“So, I guess I’ll be taking those coordinates and be on my way,” he continued, “unless someone wants to grovel for the chance to accompany me.”

Tak stomped up to Zim and unleashed a cavalcade of Irken at him. Dib wasn’t sure what she said, but if cricket/bat/snake could cuss someone out, he imagined it’d sound something like that.

“Okay,” Zim squeaked out, looking up at Tak who now towered over him. “I suppose I could let you come, but only because you asked so nicely.”

“I’m coming too,” Dib declared.

Tak and Zim both turned to him with questioning looks on their faces. “Uh, what?” Zim said.

“I’m coming. I want to see what’s on that planet, too.”

“This doesn’t concern you, human,” Tak spat.

“Excuse me? Who’s house are you two crashing at? Who’s ancient computer did you use to get those coordinates? And who’s been keeping your ship running while you’ve been got?”

“We don’t need-” Zim started, but Dib cut him off.

“Yes you do,” he shot back. “You need my lab to get your base working again. You said so yourself. And Tak, you need my garage and my tools if you’re going to fix your ship. If you want to stay here and use my equipment, to fix your stuff, you need to let me in on the conspiracy.”

The two Irkens looked at each other intently, as if holding a telepathic conversation. Dib briefly wondered if they could communicate semi-telepathically, or at least through pheromones. They did have antenna after all.

Finally, they broke their stare down and turned back to Dib. “Fine, the Dib can come,” Zim conceded.

Dib felt a jolt of excitement jump through his body. “Yeah, Gaz and I-”

“Nope,” Gaz said, turning on her heals and heading back inside.

Okay, so no Gaz. Aw well, he could at least count on her to cover for him while he’s gone. “I will get my space travel equipment and be ready to leave within the hour.”

“Yeah, fine, whatever,” Zim said, and he and Tak headed back inside as well. Dib went further into the garage and began preparing the things he’s need for the trip.

“You’re seriously going to let him come along?” Tak asked as they walked away.

“Eh,” Zim said with a shrug. “If the Dib-worm wants to come to a dead planet where total species-wide genocide took place, let him.”

Dib let the helmet he’d been holding clang to the floor. “Wait, what?”

[elatedmarvel]

After All This Time, You and I (1/4)

Summary: Bucky has known you your entire life. Snapshots through the years.

Word Count:  1948

AN: Hello! Long time no see! This is for @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan​‘s Follower Celebration! Congrats to you Star, you deserve every single one!! My prompt was Best Friend’s Sibling. This was originally going to be a long oneshot, but I felt like the flow was better to separate it into a two-shot. Title is from Mary’s Song by Taylor Swift for obvious reasons. Thank you for hosting this awesome writing challenge Star! I had so much fun writing this!

Warnings: tiny mention of violence, swear words

“The building burning up Buck! You gotta get out of here!” Steve shouts staring down his best friend from across the bridge.

“No! Not without you!” comes Bucky’s fierce reply. His eyes scan over the wreck, trying to find something to save Stevie. 

Steve takes a deep breath and prays that the crumbling bridge will hold a little longer, and he charges across the chasm. He almost makes it to the other side when his foot gets caught on a pillow. Tumbling over, he avoids landing on Bucky, but knocks over the unsuspecting person on his right. 

You land with a thud on your hands and knees, and quickly scramble to look at your right knee. There’s a moment of silence, and the boys hold their breath waiting for the inevitable wail. 

“I’m sorry!” Steve cries before wrapping his arms around you in a clumsy hug. He really didn’t see you playing next to him, it was an accident! Your bottom lip sticks out and your eyes become more and more glassy. 

“Please don’t cry” he begs, partly because it breaks his heart, and partially because he doesn't want get in trouble. He knew what kind of hellfire Sarah Rogers could rain down.   

“We’re sorry, what can we do to make it up to you?” Bucky asks, scooting himself to face your tear stained face. He felt bad for making Steve run across the bridge, he never meant to hurt you. 

“I-I need a groom for my wedding.” you state without hesitation, wiping at your eyes. “And I can’t marry Steve cause he’s my brother, duh.” Your wet eyes turn to look intently at Bucky. 

“You can’t get married, you’re 6.” Bucky tries to argue.

“So? You’re 8! That’s only 2 years older! ‘Sides, it’s not real anyway.” you fires back, your bottom lip juts out again, ready to cry if that’s what it takes.

He’s taken a back for a moment at your reply, and blue eyes meet Steve’s pleading ones. He’d do anything for you, and of course Steve was the cherry on top. 

“Ok. Fine.”

On a rainy day in April, Steve walks you down the aisle. 

Clad in his nicest, unstained, khaki pants, Bucky’s heart skips a beat when he sees you. You’re wearing your Cinderella costume from Halloween, and some stolen red lipstick from your mom, smiling like you got an extra juice pop. Somehow, he already knows your the prettiest girl in the world.  

In front of your moms, stuffed animals and barbies, Bucky promises to always make you laugh and smile, and to protect you. You promise to always share her toys and food with him, and to make him feel better when he’s sad.

The ceremony ends after Steve pronounces you both husband and wife, and while your moms cheer and tear up slightly, Bucky leans in and gives you a quick peck on the cheek. It won’t be so bad being married to her, he thinks.

~~~

School sucked for Bucky today. Steve got into a fight with Zemo, which lead to Bucky getting in a fight with Zemo. That punk couldn’t even breathe right, it frustrated Bucky to no end that he couldn’t stop being stupid. Turns out, being punched in face hurts more than it looks in the movies. And of course, his parents weren’t thrilled and took away his TV privileges for the week, which meant he couldn’t find out what happened on his favorite show the Howling Commandos. Last week was even a cliffhanger! Captain America and the Winter Soldier were stuck on a plane with bombs on them and fast approaching Manhattan! 

Wallowing, both Steve and him were relegated to “use their imaginations” and playing in the backyard. Bored out of their minds, they played hide and seek, a babies game really if you asked Bucky. But, Steve was nice enough to let Bucky hide first, and Bucky couldn’t say no to that bruised face.

So here he was, climbing the ladder to the old tree house, hoping Steve wouldn’t look here right away. Sniffles drew his attention you, crying softly in the corner with your knees to your chest. You were blasting music from your walkman, Endless Love from what Bucky could hear. It was really bad then. His chest hurt seeing your red rimmed eyes, and crawled next to you. 

“Hey, what’s going on?” he asked lowly, taking her headphones off of your head and pausing the song. You didn’t look him in the eye, but leaned into him more when he put his arm around you. 

“Stupid boys.” you sniffle. Wiping your face, you finally meet Bucky’s worried eyes. “Jake dumped me for Sierra, cause she always has chocolate snack packs in her lunch.”

“That weasel! Want me to rough him up a little?”

“Thanks, but I think you and Stevie are in enough trouble as it is.” you chuckle, placing your head on his shoulder. He gently rubs his hand up and down your arm, wishing he could take away your pain. 

“I could pretend to be your boyfriend, make him jealous your going out with a 6th grader.” he offers.

“You can’t be my boyfriend, you’re already my husband!” you joke. His eyes go wide, remembering your lovely wedding ceremony and the massive amounts of cake you both ate at the “reception”. 

“Hey! That’s right! Technically you were cheating on me with him! I want a divorce.” he jokes, bumping your shoulder with his. 

You giggle and place a hand on his, “Please forgive me! It’s been so hard being separated from you now that you’re in middle school! He didn’t mean anything! Promise!”

You both erupt laughing so hard that Bucky falls over and brings you with him, which makes you both laugh even harder. Managing to calm down, he places a kiss on your forehead and hugs you closer to him. His heart does a funny dance in his chest, but he ignores it. You’re so warm against him, and your shampoo smelled so good, he could lay here with you forever. 

“I guess I’ll forgive you this once, but don’t let it happen again.” he says solemnly. 

You nod, hair tickling his face, “It won’t, you’re the only one for me Bucky Barnes.” 

~~~

 The room’s getting dark, but he couldn’t be bothered to get up and turn on the light. Not when Lional Richie was pouring his heart out. He couldn’t go down to dinner, his whole family had heard her breaking up with him. Did Dot really have to come over and break things off in the driveway? It would kill him to see the pity in his mom’s eyes, and sit through the uncomfortable talk with his dad about his feelings. He knew they were worried about him, and wanted to help, but he couldn’t stomach facing them.

They hadn’t been going out for long, but being dumped for the first time, he didn’t know how to handle his heartache. Honestly, he didn’t know if he was even heartbroken, or just wallowing in self-pity of being blindsided by the breakup. 

A knock on the door brought him out of his misery. Must be his mom, bringing food up to him like the saint that she was. He stands up slowly, acutely aware of how his muscles ache from being curled in a ball for most of the day, and stretches as he makes his way to the door. 

Your bright eyes stare back at him when he opens the door, and in his shock, he takes in the box of pizza you holdand the enormous bag of junk food. 

“What’re you doing here?” voice cracking from underuse. 

“Steve told me what happened with Dot. I brought pizza and your favorite snacks and movies. I can drop them off and leave though if you would rather be alone?” your voice hopeful that he won’t turn you away. Like he could, he’s never turned you away before and he won’t start now. 

A small smile makes its way onto his face, and he opens the door wider so you can come into the bedroom. Your grin soothes the ache in his chest. You put the pizza down on his nightstand and cue up Star Wars. Getting cozy on his bed and patting the spot next to you, it seems like you fit right in. He didn’t need to be asked twice. 

By 4 AM, he’s forgotten all about what’s-her-name, and his earlier self-pity and heartbreak. Not when Star Wars was playing in the background and your blinking sleepily at the TV, head on his shoulder. 

~~~

“Bucky, we have a situation.” Steve announces, flopping onto Bucky’s bed. Bucky looks up from the laptop in his lap with a confused stare, waiting from Mr. Dramatic to explain. He didn’t have time for his antics, his last college final of the semester was due next week.

“Y/N’s prom date bailed on her, and it’s tomorrow.” was all Steve said, and looked at Bucky, waiting for what he knew would happen now.

“That dick.” Bucky replied, mentally searching for his tux. “If I leave now, I can make it with enough time to shower and get ready.” And he hops off the bed, grabbing his duffle bag, he stuffs whatever he may need for the impromptu trip home. Steve just stares at him with a smile on his face like the little shit he is. 

A 5 hour drive home, shower, frantic search for his tux, and a quick power nap later, he knocks on your door. He wishes he could photograph the look of surprise on your face, your jaw literally drops when he see him in his tux.

“Bucky?!” And he swears he forgot how beautiful you were. Literally glowing, and he doesn't think it’s from the makeup, he can’t help himself as he takes in your dress. You’ll be the most beautiful one there, no contest. “Hey doll.” he smirks at you, still amused by your shocked state. He can tell when your brain catches up when your eyes soften as you look up at him.

“What are you doing here?” you ask in a soft voice. 

“Taking you to prom, what else would I be doing?” and he can see you calculating in your head. 

“Bucky, you must have driven all night!” you exclaim. Bucky loves when your eyes grow wide, it’s so cute.

“It’s fine, who needs sleep?” he says as he steps inside, past your frozen, and shocked state. Steve must have told your parents he was coming, he can see your parents waiting with the camera in the living room. 

“You told me you were going to work on your final all weekend.” you fire back, closing the door. 

“This is more important to me.” and he can tell you don’t quite believe him. You have a scowl on your face that reminds him of when you would catch him stealing a piece of candy as kids. He’s pretty sure you think it’s intimidating, but he finds it adorable. 

“I promise that I worked on it already, and I’ll be ok.” and he presses a kiss to your forehead. “You look beautiful.” your glad your foundation hides the sudden flush of your face. 

“You’re not too shabby yourself.” you tease back. But really, seeing him like this does inexplicable things to your heart. He’s so handsome, and he had driven all night to take you to prom. You could just kiss him. 

Taking your hands in his, you look into his eyes. “Thank you.” you say earnestly. 

And Bucky knew in that moment, he would drive days to get to you if needed.

Part 2 

[sumeshi-t]

the idea of making hc’s of children is sosososo cute. i’ll follow ur steps chloe @akaashit-baeji lolol this is gonna be really self-indulgent buuut my excuse is that it’s my birthday so here it goes... i'm writing the last half of this with a hangover and a bad case of dysmenorrhea... sucks 2 be me

Oikawa Teru (及川 輝)

his name “輝“ means “bright”, and this boi lives up to it because, let’s face it, he’s gonna be like his dad. he embodies this “brightness”, in a way that he’s smart, and he makes sure he and his team’s (or whichever team he’s going to be in) will shine on the court

wavy/curly hair and a victim of my and his dad’s astigmatism. always has this cheeky smile, and he gets my brimming energy so he’s really approachable and charming

very good with words; it’s like he always knows what to say

when he plays he also wears contact lenses

but don’t be fooled. in their generation, it’s him who has to put iwaizumi’s son in check. he knows everything about his teammates too, he knows more than what he lets on (which sometimes, they find creepy, but they all know he means well)

anyway, unlike his dad, he doesn’t really mind having geniuses around. instead, he watches them very closely; something like “mutualism”. he knows what he lacks and he knows he can learn from them too, vice versa.

is into horror games. in his free time, he and his sister take turns playing. and they decide it by seeing who can last the longest without flinching/screaming. he’s annoyed because his sister’s better at it 

has fans, ngl. i mean look at him. however, the female fans especially, are pretty on guard. he’s approachable, but anytime they see him with his sister... they back out. he doesn’t mind, he loves his sister and it actually amuses him. he’s the same when it comes to the boys who hang around her too!

basically protective siblings who are always there for eo

is very neat. can’t concentrate when something is out of place. he keeps his nails short, has a somewhat flowery scent. yes, he uses female perfumes because he despises strong smells.

bug-catching was his childhood hobby just like mine’s was. used to sneak beetles in iwaizumi’s son’s backpack back then

he will never admit it but he actually asks his sister for fashion tips because his taste sucks ass so bad

basically his major problem or issue in life is getting compared to his father (he’s also a setter). he hates that so much, being hidden in the shadow of his dad, and when people just recognize him for being oikawa tooru’s son.

something he and ushijima’s child relate to so strongly. they’re friendly rivals; might end up being teammates in their career hmm

so when he’s the one stressed, he skips practice for a day just so he could recollect his thoughts. usually stays in the library to read books he picked up based on the titles; might either open up to iwa or his sister later on, it depends. then when he’s okay, he doubles the amount of training

Oikawa Rie (及川 麗恵) it’s /ri-ye/ oki

so the kanjis are: "麗" meaning, beautiful and "恵" is blessed. tooru thought of this name obviously

also has curly hair like mine. has that tiny mole below her eye just like i do. actually has lots of moles over her body; one time she fell asleep on the couch her brother drew connecting lines between the moles on her arm and called them constellations. it was nice she thought but still, the next day, teru had to wear a band-aid over his nose bridge.

she’s just a year younger. is less “vibrant” than her brother, a bit more serious. has a resting bitch face and she’s not even sorry about it and i love her for that

she’s actually relieved she looks like that, or else she knows the girls in her class would flock to her just to get in her brother’s pants. usually brushes them off with “ask him, not me” or “do you think that’s any of my concern?” 

her tongue her words damn never get to this baby girl’s bad side she’s gonna burn you alive. like fr when she’s angry, oh she’s gonna show you that she’s angry. but tbh she's very sweet, leaves little notes or little gifts to her friends every now and then

she just doesn’t want her brother’s heart to be broken (she’s heard stories from her mom about her dad’s many hs exes), and she knows teru’s struggles

therefore

doesn’t really like volleyball that much. it’s because she didn’t get to grow up with her dad around, she felt like it separated her from him. she’s not mad at him though. she’s very supportive of him and her brother.

used to play vb though when they were kids. but that’s all it was for her

she’s the team’s honorary manager lol the occasional “i brought you guys sumn” or “something-kun, a girl from my class says she likes you so do your best” etc

the team’s lil sister how bout that

despite being tolerant of horror games, this girl is vvvv squeamish. she cries at the sight of internal organs or blood. biology lab was the worst time of her life 

when she dug up my hs videos she was shook to discover i once did theater. and thus begins her interest in theater too

and??? baby girl is actually???? really really good???? 

the girls she used to shut down nicknamed her “prima”, short for “prima donna” she hates it. hates it more when her closest theater buddy was the one who spread that around

immediately went to the gym to spike some balls from her brother. baby girl was crying because she was just so pissed.

she was given ice cream and sweets afterwards. ugh it’s so cute idk she’s baby to the team skksksk they protecc

in that upcoming play, her first ever performance, the whole team got front row seats and howled when she came on during curtain call; it was vvv sweet and memorable even if the guys were kinda reprimanded afterwards lmao

which is why, in return, boiis also have a hard time approaching her because damn??? the vb team as your knights???? excuse me??? 

oh have i mentioned she has a sweet tooth? mygod. she has a stash of sweets in her room. teru has had to sneak some away because she might get tooth aches or diabetes

her pastel nail polish is arranged by shade, her body clock is fucked up lmao she hates the mornings; has succulents by her window which she names after various characters from books/plays etc she’s for sure gonna be a theater actress tho

asks help from iwa’s son for math. even her brother’s 0% help. teru is smart but a terrible teacher. she’s an above-average student and that’s all that matters for her. she can leave the spotlight to her brother because she only craves one type of spotlight

Miya Seiichi (宮 聖一) and Miya Seiji (宮 聖二)

their names literally mean “聖” sacred then “一” is one, and “二” is two

atsumu thought it was funny. when they were kids, seiichi’s nickname was “juan” and seiji’s was “tutu” (i gave them the nicknames)

when the twins discovered the meaning behind the nicknames, they hated it. especially seiji, he despises it vvv much

so when they were hs, seiichi = chi, seiji = ji for the people they're close with

as we can see here, the twins unfortunately got my curls. seiichi likes his hair as is. he doesn’t like the thought of dyeing his hair just to be differentiated from his twin. in fact he enjoys twin jokes, enjoys tripping people up about it. seiji on the other hand, grew tired of his brother’s jokes and by the time hs started, he sacrifices his soft hair. 

between the two, seiji is the one who has my ugly eyesight. add to the fact that he reads a lot (once he starts he can’t put it down. so he reads in the dark, in a moving car etc)

the piercings was a thing that happened between them, and their cousins (which were also twins wtf)–it was a 2v2 vb thing and they lost

surprisingly, the cousins weren't pleased bc atsumu didn't scold them for getting piercings (but for playing half-heartedly). seiichi wanted the piercings tho tbh it was the perfect excuse. ngl, seiji also wanted them.

first let's talk abt seiichi, aside from the fact he also got my mole (he feels it makes him look cuter tho)

seiichi's into vb, but not a setter. he's the ace. may or may not push through with it as a career. he hasn't decided yet. is actually a bit sad that seiji didn't join the vb club in hs, he wanted them to be like his dad and uncle.

seiichi doesn't have any uh, quirks like shutting the whole cheer squad up like his dad does. but he usually dribbles the ball five times before any serve (this is something i did before) and he likes the 'ooooh hey' thing the crowd does when he goes for a serve

his side of the room doesn't have much stuff going on except workout equipment. he follows what exercise plan i give him as da PT mom that i am, and he is very strict with his diet and with what he eats–he's close to not needing a calorie counter anymore; but not a picky eater. he loves his uncle's cooking very much and he is jealous he can't cook even if he tries

he can do beatboxing, he learned it through youtube lmao his spotify playlists are da bombest; he learns a lot in youtube tho in his free time. his current interest is magic tricks and french (he thinks he can use it to woo that girl from class 4)

he hates insects, and hates mess. he has had to scold his twin about it that it escalated to them having this imaginary line in the middle of the room

anyway, he's straightforward. but not rude. he just doesn't like any pretenses so he says what he thinks or feels is right. may or may not have led to some misunderstandings, but he owns up to his mistakes if he crossed a line

next, seiji

even if he looks like a nerd with his glasses tbh he is not he actually hates studying. you can love reading without having to love studying right? he's that dude

the only time that he regrets dyeing his hair was when he realizes couldn't change identities so his brother could take his exam for him

his side of the room is littered with his sketches, notes from books, pencils everywhere – he drew a bunch of ants one time on a paper and made it look like they're real ass ants and placed it on seiichi's pillow

to solve this problem, atsumu has planned to give him a tablet for his next birthday

quits vb in hs because he kinda lost interest? he still finds it fun but he doesn't wanna be put under the pressure that his dad and uncle left for them lmao

he's in art clubs tho

he designs banners/posters for the team anyway. they use his strategic mind from the shit he's read for any plays and stuff so when he's not drawing, he's thinking

he might look like he has no emotions, but tbh he is more emotional and empathetic than his brother. he cries easily over the simplest things, like those grandparents vids, or rescuing animals and stuff

and thats why he doesn't let people in too much bc he knows he'll be hurt (dw seiichi knows this vvv well, and even if they do have arguments, he loves his lil bro and helps him about this)

has once begged to have a cat at home–seiichi didn't want bc he knows his twin is gonna leave him for clean up lmao

he can cook period.

he's gonna either be an architect or an animator, still hasn't decided.

his music taste sucks lmao. his youtube recents are filled with cooking stuff; in constant conversation with his uncle abt cooking lol it be cute sometimes atsumu is jealous bc he feels his son is closer to his brother than with him

he is forgetful that's why his stuff is messy lol he keeps misplacing stuff, sometimes it's literally in front of him and he's just 'where????'

but remembers dates well, remembers plays well. he's good at nitpicking tiny nearly insignificant details. just anything outside studying? he's good. dw he passes his classes but he hates giving effort for that shit lololol

[thenovelartist]

Sleepover Snafu

So, here’s the crack fic that I pulled out of my WIPs and finished this week. It’s... ridiculous. XD

Never once did it cross his mind that giving a small gift to his friend as his superhero persona would be a Bad Idea™.

“You know Chat Noir?!”

Because it never crossed his mind that she may be hosting a sleepover for her sixteenth birthday.

“Uhh… hi, ladies,” he greeted with a strained grin knowing full well that Marinette was going to string him up by his tail the next time she got the chance. “Fancy seeing all you here.”

“What are you doing here?” Mylene asked.

“Oh, please tell me there isn’t an akuma nearby!” Rose cried.

“Please,” Alya dismissed with a wave of her hand. “I’d know if there was.”

“Yeah,” Juleka assured. “Her akuma sense would be tingling.”

There was a round of snickers while Alya shot a glare at Juleka.

Chat thought he’d get two seconds to slip out with the distraction. But Alix.

Oh. Alix.

“So, Marinette. When did you become his ‘princess’?”

And suddenly, Chat was on the hot seat. The girls circled him as he sat cross-legged on the chaise lounge with Marinette by his side.

“For the record, kitty,” she said. “I hate you.”

…

An hour later, after answering all the questions they threw his way and winning all—sans Alix—over with some over-the-top theatrics about how desperately and deeply he was in love with his ladybug and though Marinette was a wonderful friend, he could never forsake his lady, for she owned his heart.

“You all,” Alix grumbled. “Are saps.”

Thankfully, he won Alix over after the girls let him stay and play games with them. After all, not many people got to play games with Paris’ second favorite superhero.

They had a good time, though it was difficult to pretend he didn’t know anything about these girls other than the fact they’d been akuma victims.

But then got to the part of the night were Alya got that gleam in her eye that Nino constantly complained about because it always spoke volumes of trouble. “Chat Noir,” she purred. He noticed how Marinette was immediately on edge. “You’re a guy in love.”

He quirked an eyebrow, uncertain about where this was going. “Yes.”

“You surely know what it would take to get a guy’s attention.”

And he felt like he was back in the hot seat because now every girl was giving him that smug look.

He swallowed. “Y-yeah?”

From beside him, Marinette buried her face in her hands with a groan.

This was not going to end well.

“So,” Alya began. “Surely with you being such great friends with Marinette, you’d be willing to help her gain the attention of the love of her life.”

Again, Marinette groaned in her hands.

But Chat Noir, for his part, just blinked. Marinette? A crush on a guy? Really?

“She never told you?” Mylene asked.

“It’s not like it’s some big secret or anything,” Alix added rather smugly.

Chat just shook his head.

Alya clapped her hands then rubbed them together. Which meant this was happening and nothing could stop it.

“Chat Noir,” she said. “We. Are officially drafting you. To be part. Of the ‘get Adrien Agreste and Marinette out on a date’ squad.”

He choked on air, and the world started feeling a whole lot smaller. He was barely aware of Marinette mumbling something incoherent into her hands.

Alya nodded proudly. “Yup. You’ll help, right, Chat? The girl needs all the help she can get.”

“I do not!” Marinette protested, finally pulling her face from her hands. “I can talk to him on my own.”

The girls all rolled their heads her direction.

Chat may not be the most socially versed kid on the block, but he knew full well that when five girls roll their heads and shoot someone that look, it’s bad.

Like, cataclysm bad.

“Let’s recap, shall we?” Alya challenged. “The scarf you knitted you couldn’t give to him.”

“And let his father take the credit for.”

“You also took up fencing.”

“And sparred with him, but never talked.”

“The wild plan to sneak Adrien away from his bodyguard so that you could take him out to ice cream.”

“I still don’t remember who was Rose.”

“Who cares? She left me standing on that stupid bridge for a half hour.”

“You weren’t there when she had the opportunity for him to drive her home.”

“Only for her to babble like an idiot and turn him down. Our whole plan was for not.”

“Ladies, focus,” Alya said. “And lastly, we have our ‘almost gave up on him’ fiasco.”

Juleka crossed her arms. “I’m still not cool with you pulling my brother into it.”

“Especially since you did kinda lead him on.”

“And you didn’t even succeed in the end!” Alix cried. “You had the perfect opportunity to say ‘yes, Adrien, just the two of us’.”

“And now Nino’s telling me how Adrien’s trying to convince him that it would be fun if the entire class came to the rink.”

“When it could have been a DATE!” the girl’s all shouted in unison.

“So forgive us,” Alya finished with a sarcastic smile. “If we have so little faith in you.”

Marinette was back to hanging her head.

Chat’s head was spinning in circles, and it seemed like it wasn’t going to stop anytime soon. All those moments with Marinette… and they were because she was trying to be more than friends with him?

Somehow, after a long time, he found his voice. “You really like this guy, princess?”

Marinette didn’t look up at him for a long while before finally shooting him a glance and a single nod. “Yeah,” she said, her voice quiet and shy. “But it’s never going to happen.”

Chat’s heart was officially yanked in two. He loved his lady, that was clear to the world. But Marinette… she was pretty spectacular, too. And who was he kidding? His heart liked to flutter around her. Not quite like it did with his lady, but noticeable enough to get him to pause pretty often. And now she was here, bearing her heart—well, having her friends bear her heart to him—and the last thing he wanted to do now that it was an undeniable truth that he held her fragile, precious heart in his hands was to crush it.

“Because Mr. “just friends” doesn’t have any real reason to take you out,” Alix deadpanned.

“No matter how obvious you might be,” Alya continued. “He’s clueless.”

Chat had to bite is tongue before he gave away his identity. Instead, he focused on Marinette, one of the best friends a guy could have.

But she was also the only person in the world, sans Ladybug, whom would have him abusing his superhero powers just to visit her in the middle of the night and watch movies together.

“Could we just drop it for tonight?” Marinette asked. “Please?”

As Chat looked over at his friend, he found that her blue eyes were begging for release just as her crimson cheeks proved her embarrassment. She really liked him. If all those things were true—which, there really wasn’t any reason for them not to be—then Marinette cared deeply. “You said you gave him a scarf,” he asked. “Yet let his father take credit for it?”

“Yeah,” Alya said. “I mean, it was sweet, but the girl couldn’t give him anything without becoming completely useless.”

“So why let his dad take credit?”

“Because,” Marinette answered. “You should have seen the look in his face. It just… he was so happy thinking that his father made that scarf for him. I couldn’t take that away from him! I just… couldn’t. And no, I’ll probably never tell him. Let him be happy.”

Something in Chat’s chest twisted painfully. “And you’re okay with that?”

She shrugged. “It means more that way to him.”

The girls let a collective sigh. “It’s so sweet,” Rose commented.

“Even though she totally should take credit for her work,” Juleka added.

“Yeah,” Alix agreed, “but where Adrien’s concerned, let’s face it, common sense goes straight out the window.”

Marinette hid her face in her hands again, and Chat knew he was going to have to make a decision with the heart he currently held in his hands.

So he put up an over-large smile. “So, Princess, sounds like you’re pretty head over heels for this guy, so I’ll tell you what: I’ll help you out.”

“Oh, that’s not necessary.”

“Yeah it is!” was the chorus from the girls.

“Please, do, Chat Noir,” Alya begged. “I would literally do anything.”

Chat put on a show of thinking. Thankfully, something came to mind. “You should write him a letter.”

The girl’s faces fell. Clearly it wasn’t what they were expecting.

“Yup,” Chat said with a grin. “Go. Do it. A letter with all the things you’d never say to his face.”

Marinette knew him too well by now. “Why?” she said, her eyes narrowing. “What are you thinking?”

“Because,” he said. “I dare you to take one of those things and actually say it to him.”

Her expression fell, while all the other girls brightened like the sun.

“Yeah!”

“That’s a great idea.”

“This will be amusing.”

“No!” Marinette cried. “No way. Not happening.”

“Come on, Princess,” he said with a grin. “Trust me.”

She quirked a brow, showing she didn’t.

He frowned. “Harsh.”

“Yeah, but you can trust us,” Alya quickly chimed in. “And that’s a good idea! We’ll even help you.”

There was a round of consent from the other girls, meaning Marinette was sat down at her desk. The girls surrounded her, throwing out ideas of just what she should tell Adrien. Everything from “I admire your kindness” to “Hey Hot Stuff, get dressed up for me today?” made its way to the paper.

Marinette couldn’t even stay mad for long as the more ridiculous things got put on the page. But the amusing thing was, there was a part of Marinette that clearly meant everything, even the ridiculous phrases.

There was a lot of laughter and giggles and amusement. And Chat was about to crash the fun as well as put himself squarely on Marinette’s kill list.

“It’s perfect, Princess. Meaning now…” He snatched the paper out of her hand. “I’ll deliver this to a certain someone and give him a clear explanation.”

Chat found some sick, twisted pleasure in watching not only Marinette but all the girls’ faces fall in shock.

He shot them a wink. “Trust me, Princess. If he’s that blind, he needs a bat over the head. And I’ll be sure to give it to him. I’ll see you later.”

He was halfway out the door when he heard Marinette shriek his name and Alix cackle like a madwoman. It was at that moment he knew that he’d never be able to go back to Marinette’s without serious consequences.

And Plagg… well…

The little shit found it fricking hilarious.

…

Marinette wanted to simultaneously melt into a puddle and slaughter a certain superhero. She swore the next time she saw Chat Noir—as Ladybug because Chat was smart enough not to return to Marinette’s house for a good while—she was going to tie him up and leave him hanging from the Eiffel Tower.

And that feeling increased tenfold when she saw Adrien appear.

Alix was already laughing. Alya was patting her shoulder reassuringly. And Marinette wanted to die.

She was going to skin that cat and use him as a rug.

“Hey, Marinette,” Adrien greeted, rubbing the back of his neck. “Can we… talk for a moment?”

And there it was: her march to her doom. Still, she followed him to a quiet corner of the school so he could let her down easy with as few witnesses—if any—as humanly possible.

“Look,” she said once she was sure they were alone. “If it’s about the thing Chat Noir gave you then—”

His dazzling smile caused her to stop in her tracks. “Don’t worry Purr-incess,” he whispered to her. “Your little secret is safe with me. Always has been. Always will be. I’m not that cruel to give a paper like that to some unsuspecting guy.” He sent her a wink and then marched off, stupid smug smirk on his stupid face and his stupid green eyes dazzling with mirth.

And it took her far too long for her mind to kick back and gear and process his words.

She looked up at him, not believing it. He couldn’t… no way…

But Adrien spun around, waggling his brows and shooting her another wink and she swore right then and there…

“I’m going to kill you, you stupid cat!”

[neo-culture-mafia]

Older Members: Reaction to Daughter Defending Themselves

Hello my little beans,

This has been in drafts for a while and I think this is actually an awesome idea. I am going to only be doing realistically possible members...so no ‘99 - ‘00 line. Eventually...but not right now. So as you requested I will do Taeil - Jungwoo. I hope you like it and remember to request more if you would like. Also, thank you. I love that you love out blog so much.

Love, ~J

P.S. Since most of the members aren’t super old, I’m not going to make the child like 15 or 16, I’m going to be more realistic with this one and make some of the included members who happen to be younger, have younger kids...if that makes sense (some will have ‘special’ case tho [i.e. adoption, etc.]).

______________

LEE TAEYONG (Had daughter when he was 17 - Single Father - 7 years)

You were literally sitting there, playing angry birds. You had been waiting for your dad to come back from the car. He was in eyesight but he was on the phone with Uncle Yuta so he had to step away so you wouldn’t hear. He sat and watched you from the driver's seat, but he was still too far away for what was about to happen. 

“Hey, little girl.” a man said as he sat next to you. You looked back to see your dad freeze and just stare at you and the man. You turned back to the man with a smile, not wanting to be rude. “Hello, sir.” You said and returned to your game. “I have this really cute puppy in my car if you want to come see.” He said and you shook your head no. “Oh why not?” He asked as he pouted. “Because you’re a stranger...and you’re smelly.” you mumbled. Before you knew it, your phone was snatched from your hands. “Hey!” You yelled and the man took off. “Come and catch me, little girl!” He yelled and you hopped down from the bench. You began to run and try to get your phone back. “You as-” You began screaming, yet strong arms picked you up. “Hey little lady.” Your dad said holding you tightly. “I hope you weren’t going to say what I think you were going to say.” He said as he began walking to the car with you in his arms. “But...he took my phone!” You said pointing to the man. “Yeah, I know. I can get you a new one. There are unlimited phones, but only one of you.”

___________

MOON TAEIL (Acquired daughter when older sister passed after an accident - Single Father [”uncle”] - 13 years)

You both went to the arcade for the day because of the good report you got from school. You took the advantage at this chance to just forget the compound and focus on right now. Even though he was technically an uncle...he was your dad. Your real father had disappeared after your mom passed, so Taeil was all you had left. You were going to ask him today if you could call him dad, so today was a day that would stay in your memory; no matter the outcome.

“You are so gonna lose at air hockey!” He said pushing your shoulder as you both walked into the air-conditioned arcade. “Yeah, sure old man.” You sneered playfully. He held his chest with a fake hurt expression written on his face. “The last one to the air hockey section buys lunch!” You said starting to run through the semi-empty arcade. “I’m the only one who brought money!” He laughed and chased after you. You make it first and are waiting patiently with your hands on your hips. “Oh my gosh, you act just like your mother.” He said ruffling your hair and taking a place at the other end of the table. You smile to yourself and fix your hair. He inserts a token and you both play 2 rounds before you go to the racing games. “Hey, can I ask you something?” You said, getting ready for rejection. “Yeah...but can I go to the bathroom first?” He asked and you nodded. “Of course. I’ll just wait here.” You said and he nodded, running off. 

“...y/n...?” Someone questions. You turn around looking for the source. It was a man around Taeil’s age. “May I help you?” You asked, pausing the game. “I just have been looking for you for so long,” he said walking over and bringing you in for a hug. “it’s me...your dad? Don’t you remember me?” He asked as he held you in his arms and looked down at you. “D-dad?” You questioned. “I have waited so long to hear you say that.” He smiled holding you close again. “Let’s go get some food and catch up!” He said grabbing your wrist and pulling you away. “Wait...no.” You said, coming back to your senses. “No. Let go!” You said hitting his wrist. But he regripped your arms and pulled with all his might. “Stop! Come on. You’re coming with me.” He said pulling harder. “No. Dad!” You screamed for help. “What?” Two people asked at the same time. You looked back and saw Taeil standing there. With one final tug from you, you were free from your father and running into the arms of Taeil. He held you and put you behind him. “Get the hell out of here.” Taeil seethed, looking at the man who claimed you as his own. “Not without her.” He said trying to come closer. You gripped onto Taeil. “Don’t make me go.” You squeezed your eyes shut. “You’re not leaving.” He comforted you, bringing you in his arms. “Leave. Before I get someone down here to make you leave like I did the last time you tried showing up in her life. She wants to find you? That’s different. But I’m not going to allow you to come in her life when you were the one who walked away in the first place.” Taeil said and the sorry man just gave up. 

“You okay?” He asked and you nodded, making sure the man already left. “Yeah.” You mumbled. “Okay, good...” he said ruffling your hair and pinching your cheek slightly. “When you were calling for ‘dad’...did you mean me?” He asked and you nodded after a moment. “If you don’t like that, I won’t call you th-” “I would be honored if you would.” He said and you just looked at him and smiled. You hugged him tightly. “Thanks, dad.” 

___________

SEO JOHNNY (Mom was going to put you up for adoption if he didn’t take you - Single Father - 8 years)

You waited outside of your dance studio that had become a second home outside of the compound. Your phone rang and you quickly answered it seeing as it was your dad. “Hey, dad.” You cheered. “Hey, baby. I’m going to be a couple minutes late. I’m on my way, I’m just stuck in traffic.” He said. “Alright. I’ll wait right here.” You cheered. “Okay.” He said and you hung up. 

You pop your earbuds in and just listen to random music until someone ripped your earbud out. You look up and the man suddenly slapped you. He grabbed you as your phone fell to the ground. You start kicking and screaming. He was still running for a while until you realized that you could easily take this dude down. You start laying your knees into his ribs. He gripped your thighs so you couldn’t move your legs. You put your mouth close to his neck and bit down hard. He screamed, dropping you and grabbing his neck. He tried kicking you so you wouldn’t move, but you were quicker than he was. You got up and ran as fast as your little legs could take you back to where you were supposed to be picked up. You couldn’t help the tears roll down your face as you heard the steps of the man behind you. 

You got back to the studio to see your dad looking around as he held your phone. “Dad!” You screamed getting his attention. He saw you and began to run towards you. “Car. Now.” He yelled and you ran past him and to the car. You got in the passenger’s seat, and curled up, not wanting to see your dad get violent. You grabbed his phone and called your bestest friend, Chenle. He answered. “Yes, hyun-” “Le le.” You cried. “Oh, y/n...what’s wrong sweetpea?” You stayed on the phone until your dad got in the car with your phone in hand. 

He began driving, rubbing your back lightly to calm you down. “I am so proud of you y/n. You did what I taught you and you didn’t give up.”

___________

NAKAMOTO YUTA  (Adopted - Single Father - 14 years) [this one will be a little different]

You haunted his dreams and every waking moment. Your screams for help ringing in his ears. You both were having fun, he turns back and he’s hit with something over the head. He watches as a group of men drag you away from him as he lies helplessly on the ground. Your inner child shone through as you yelled for ‘daddy’, trying to call for Yuta and the feeling of safeness he brought with him. “Please...get up!” You cried as they tied a scarf around your eyes. 

You were thrown in a car, continuously hit until you passed out from crying too hard. You woke up, wishing they put a bullet through your head already. They had reverted you to your younger self again; the you at the orphanage. You became quiet, docile, and childlike. You only spoke small sentences to the men who came in every hour or so. You just wanted your dad at this point, and he just wanted you home again. Most people from Seoul flew into Osaka to help him stay on his feet. 

Yet, when the men realized you really weren’t going to say anything, they decided to give you back. 

Yuta sat at the large meeting table with everyone sitting around him. “You just have to be at your A gam-” Taeyong was cut off by one of Yuta’s henchmen running in with a phone. “It’s y/n.” he said and Yuta just snatched the phone away from him. “Y/n...hello?” he called, holding onto the small electrical device. “Dad?” You asked and Yuta fell back into his seat, the tears coming into his eyes. “Are you okay?” Was all that came out of his mouth. “Yes-I have to go they’re coming.” You said and there was a whoosh on the other side of the phone. Your screams were the only thing that was heard. “No! Don’t touch her!” Yuta yelled, but he knew he couldn’t do anything. “Osaka bridge. 5 o’clock tonight. We’ll trade her for you.” Was all the man said before hanging up. 

“We...can surprise attack them or something. You can’t just...go.” Taeyong tried reasoning with Yuta as they rolled up to the bridge. “No. I’m going to do this. They want me...and I...I just want y/n to be safe.” was all that Yuta said as he put the car in park. Everyone got out and waited at the car. They were parked at the bottom of the bridge, and they all watched the bridge in anticipation for the car that would bring you home again. 

Eventually, the car rolled up, and men hopped out with you in their arms. You were still blindfolded and you looked broken...but alive. Yuta de-armed himself, putting his gun on the hood of his car. “We’ll get you,” Taeyong said, looking at Yuta then the rest of the men who could only agree with the head boss. “We’ll get you back and you guys will be a happy family again.” Taeyong said and Yuta just chuckled, nodding his head. 

He looked back up to the bridge where you were awaiting your freedom for the exchange of his. He knew he wouldn’t be coming back...and Taeyong knew that too. Taeyong just didn’t want to admit it that Yuta was doing that voluntarily - by choice of his judgment. “Just...make sure she’s happy.” Yuta said and Taeyong could only nod in defeat. 

Yuta walked up the bridge, savoring every step of freedom he had. Once halfway up the bridge, your blindfold was taken off. “Daddy!” You screamed and once you were released, you sprinted as fast as you could to Yuta who was savoring this as a bitter-sweet feeling. 

You hobbled the last few steps, digging your face into his chest and sobbing for pure joy. “Are you okay?” He asked as he took your face in his hands. You smiled through the pain and just nodded as you were happy to be in his arms again. 

The men motioned for Yuta to hurry up. “I want you to go to Taeyong and the other boys down there.” Yuta said pointing to the car at the bottom of the bridge. “But-” “I’ll be home soon. I’ll be okay.” He reassured you, but he didn’t say what home he’ll be going to. You just nodded, not realizing that this was it. 

“Cheer up. I’ll come to see you soon.” He pinched your cheek softly. You nodded, hugging him one last time before running to the car. 

Yuta watched as you got in the car and Taeyong drove away with you who would believe the world ended in happiness and rainbows. Yuta breathed in the last breath of freedom before he continued his walk of shame. Guns were drawn as he raised his arms in surrender. He walked close and eventually was in custody. 

He was thrown in the car, without restraints or blindfold. The men felt bad for him; giving him one last taste of life before it was all over soon. He leaned his head against the window as he reminisced the best moments of life. When he first brought you home...when you called him dad for the first time...when you told him you loved him for the first time. He was just proud you survived this long...especially in a world like this where it seemed that nothing was fair.

Yet he remembered everything he didn’t do yet. He never said he loved you back...but he loved you with all his heart. He would never be able to walk you down the aisle...and he would never be able to comfort you after your first heartbreak. 

He sighed, closing his eyes and smiling to himself while tears rolled down his face. 

Yet, he didn’t know what to do because he knew that you would be sitting up all night waiting for him to get back. 

...and he was never coming back...

__________

QIAN KUN (In a relationship where his S/O had a child from the previous relationship - Married - 11 years)

He thought you were fine. You were just in your room reading and listening to music. Your mom had gone to work for the day like usual and you were just chilling with your dad. Yet, you were acting really weird today so he let you have your space, getting ready to have a heart to heart with you in a little bit. He already had a drink and snack in hands, ready to leave the room with you after the talk and go make dinner with him; ready for when your mom when she came home. 

He walked down the hallway, humming to himself before standing in front of your closed door. He stopped when he heard a muffled thud. “Get the fuck off of me.” He heard you struggle. He dropped the snack and kicked the door in. He saw you struggling on the bed with a man in a mask. Your dad didn’t waste time in walking over; but before he reached the both of you, you had kneed the man in the no-no area and he groaned, slapping you roughly. You gasped and Kun grabbed the man by the hair. He pulled the man up and you got up with him. “Fuck.” The man sighed as soon as he was met with Kun’s angry expression. 

“Why is she so strong? I’ve been trying to get her out of this damn bed for like...5 minutes now.” The man struggled to get to you as you stood in a cocky stance on your bed. “Because she’s my daughter.” Kun said before headbutting the man. The man dropped to the ground. Your dad made sure the man was knocked out cold before he clutched his own forehead. “I haven’t done that in years.” He said as you hopped off the bed. “That was so cool.” You pointed to your dad and the man at the same time. “Yeah, for you maybe.” Kun chuckled as you both stared at the brawny man who laid on the ground unconscious. “5 minutes?” Kun questioned you after a moment of silence and you nodded. “The rock flew through the window and I already knew I wouldn’t be able to get to you in time. I gripped onto my headboard and got ready. He was really strong too.” You sighed, rubbing your wrists where the man had pulled on you. 

“Well, I’m proud of you.” Your dad said as he put an arm around your shoulder and pulled you closer - laying a kiss on your forehead. “But now...” He sighed looking at the man and then the broken window and broken glass. “How are we going to explain this to your mother?” 

(KUN. IS. THE. ULTIMATE. DAD. DON’T FIGHT ME ON THIS)

__________

KIM DOYOUNG (Had daughter when he was 16 - Single Father - 6 years)

“I’m gonna find you.” Doyoung cooed, looking around a corner as he followed the sound of your giggling. “And when I do you’re gonna meet the tickle monster.” He said and you laughed. You rounded the corner of the playground that was full of other kids. “Catch me if you can.” You called as you hid with your back to the wall.

Doyoung crept next to the wall where you were hiding behind. Yet, when he turned to scare you, you were missing from your place. He looked around for a split second as a slight panic set in over his mind...before a loud groan was heard throughout the play area. Doyoung ran and saw you looking down at the man who was cupping his manhood from any further violation and pain. Your dad swept you up into his arms, straightening your clothes out and planting a kiss on your forehead. “You okay, princess?” He asked. “I’ll be okay.” The man said from the ground. You and your dad slowly looked at each other, and then to the ground where the mean man laid. 

Doyoung rolled his eyes as he carried you away from the man and back to the car. “You did that to the man?” He asked, and you just nodded as you had a look of guilt on your face - expecting to get yelled at for hurting someone. All that came was your dad's open palm. You looked up at him with a confused expression. He just smiled at your solemn expression “High touch?” 

TEN (Adoption - Single - 14 years [ he is more of an older brother than a dad honestly])

“So...what are we getting for dinner?” He asked from the other side of the couch. “I don’t know. You’re the adult. Think of something.” You snarked back. He groaned, throwing his head back on the couch. “But...that’s too much work.” He said and you chuckled. “You’re the girl here. Why aren’t you in the kitchen making food?” He asked, and that sent you flying from the couch. “Excuse me?” You stood with your hands at your waist. He smiled. “I was joking, but while you’re up, can you run down to the chicken place and pick up the usual? I would...but you’re already up.” He said. You rolled your eyes, walking around the couch but not before flicking his forehead violently. 

“Hey!” He said rubbing his forehead. You stuck your tongue out at him as you slipped your shoes on. “I’ll be back.” You said throwing on one of his sweatshirts and walking out of the house. 

You walked down the semi-dark street as you daydreamed by yourself. You stepped next to an alley, and the next thing you remember was opening your eyes in the back of a car being driven by people you didn’t know. 

You tried brushing the hair out of your face, but your hands were bound. “You’ve got to be kidding me.” You whined. It was already completely dark outside. “Is she awake?” The driver asked. “Yeah, boss.” A man next to you said. “Oh, well you just told me all I need to know.” You scoffed. “My dad will beat all of your asses by the time he finds you.” You confidently said. “And how will he find you, if we already have your phone?” The man asked. “No need to be asking questions.” And your cocky tone was met with a harsh slap. You turned yourself upside down in the seat and kicked the driver with one fight and the other man with the other. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You walked in to see Ten still in the position as when you left 6 hours ago. “Hello?!” You screamed, flailing your handcuff bound wrist and bloody wrist. He turned over and looked at your deteriorated state. “Where were you?! Men captured me and drove me halfway to Busan! I saved...myself!” You yelled. “Oh...” He said looking at you up and down. “I was waiting for my chicken.” He said and you rolled your eyes, stomping to your room. You slammed the door but still heard him. “So that’s a no for the chicken?”

________

JUNG JAEHYUN (Adopted you because your father wasn’t in the picture when he first your mom - Married - 14 years)

You and your dad had actually gotten into a fight the morning you had left for school. He wanted you to wear a sweater, but you wanted to leave and putting on a sweater would take up your time. Then you called him immature so he called you a brat. It ended up with you walking yourself to school. 

You were now walking yourself home because you told your dad you didn’t want him to drive you. That was a bad idea and you realized that as soon as you noticed the car following you. You began to walk quickly but as you did that, it cut you off on a corner, and a man with a knife hopped out. “Come with us.” He grabbed your upper arm that would have been protected by a sweatshirt. “No. Let go.” You said hitting the mans hand. He looked at the man in the driver's seat as he nodded. He pulled you hard but once he realized you weren’t going anywhere, he cut your arm and hopped back in the van. You decided to be a smart ass as you took out your phone and took a picture of the license plate. The van broke hard and started reversing. 

You put your phone away and you began sprinting. Your lungs were on fire and begging for you to stop, but you cut across parks and other people’s lawns as you ended up on your front porch. You kicked the door in and ran into the kitchen where your mother was preparing dinner. “Mom.” You cried, burying your head in her chest. “Y/N! What happened to your arm?!” She asked holding you and examining your opened arm. “Where’s dad?” You sobbed, just wanting him to protect you. “In the shower. What. Happened.” She continued. You heard tires screech in front of the house. You left her and went to close the front door that hinges were now splayed across the living room floor. You saw the same van drive off, but you still barricaded yourself against the broken door. 

You clutched your injured arm, your school shirt now stained red. Your mom ran in, yelling: “Jae! Emergency!” She screamed up the stairs. You heard a door slam and footsteps coming down the hall. “Give me your arm.” Your mom said as she held a damp cloth. You whimpered, shaking your head and turning your body away from her. Your dad came down the steps with damp hair and a bulge on his hip (ON HIS HIP LADIES, CALM DOWN, THIS IS AN EMERGENCY SITUATION. FOCUS.). “What’s wrong? What’s going on?”  He asked jumping the last few steps and landing crouched in front of you. 

“She came in with a cut up arm, and she was asking for you.” Your mom shrugged, moving the hair from your face. He took his gun off his hip and set it down next to him. “What happened baby, you have to tell us.” He said gently grabbing your hand so he could see your arm. “I...I was walking home. And-and these men cut me off. Then a guy, he hopped out.” You took a breath. “And he tried to-he tried to get me in the van. I wouldn’t go so he cut me.” You said finally getting enough courage to look at the wound. When you saw it still gushing, you couldn’t take your eyes away. “Don’t look at that.” Your dad said as he gently brought your attention to his face instead. 

“Do you remember what the men looked like?” he asked and you nodded your head. “I also got a pic-picture of the license plate.” You said and he smiled. “Good job.” He pinched your cheek lightly. “We need to get this disinfected.” Your mom said motioning to your arm. You hugged your arm to your chest more, shaking your head. “Come on. We have to.” Jae said standing up. He motioned a hand out to you and you slowly accepted it. He pulled you up and lead you to the downstairs bathroom. 

You sat on the counter as he took out stuff to fix you up. Before he could even begin, you wrapped your non-messed up arm around him and hugged him. He gladly accepted the hug. “What’s this for?” He asked you curiously. “Earlier. I’m sorry I’m a brat, and I called you immature...and I broke the door.” You sighed. “Just thank-you for caring.” You said and he chuckled. “You’re not a brat. We both said stuff that was mean. So I apologize too.” He said pinching your cheek. “And even though you’re older; you’re still my little girl. I would care about you even if you didn’t want me too.”

___________

Dong Sicheng (Winwin) (Had daughter when he was 16 - Single Father - 6 years)

You were picked up by uncle Kun and uncle Yangyang. Your dad was doing something important so he couldn't come himself to pick you up from school. You knew it was serious because he usually never leaves you to come home with anyone but him. “Are you hungry?” Uncle Yangyang asked and you nodded your head quickly with a huge smile on your face. Kun held candy out in front of you while Yangyang held a juice box. “Thank you!” You happily said as you took them both in each hand. 

You all walked to the park where your dad would be meeting you guys. “Don’t step on the cracks!” You scolded your uncle Kun. “Yeah, Kun. Don’t step on the cracks!” Yangyang helped you. “I’m sorry, y/n.” Kun pinched your cheek quickly. He looked up to Yangyang where he hit him on the back of the head. “You just need to shut up.” He said and you laughed at the two men fighting. Yet, they were fighting too much to realize that a man had come by and swept you up in their arms. 

As they ran down the alley, you remember what your daddy had told you. “Aim for the eyes.” You whispered and turned towards the man while still staying in his arms. You brought your hands up and push on the man's eyes. He gargled, smacking your hands away. Yet, he pushed you off of him as he tumbled holding his eye sockets. He tumbled and hit his head on the ground, passing out completely. 

“Then after...wait for an uncle or me to come get you. We won’t be far from you. But you have to stay put.”

You groaned as you stood up, being covered in some dirt and mud from falling into a puddle. You hid your hands in your sweatshirt and looked down the alley to see no one. The man started groaning and tossing in his sleep as you got scared. Your eyes quickly filling with tears. “Uncle! Daddy!” You cried, wanting to be at the park already. Your snacks were now long gone and you were scared. The more you called for someone, the more the man woke up. Then before you knew it, you saw your dad coming down one way and your uncles coming down the other. You didn’t know who to run to, but you were brought out of your trance when the mean man pinned your small body against the brick of the building. You screamed from the suddenness and you just saw the man being pulled off by your uncle Kun. Your dad picked you up, and you let the tears flow. 

You grip onto your dad’s shoulders and didn’t look at anything else. “It’s okay baby.” He hushed. You heard groans from the man and obvious punches and kicks. Your dad fumbled for something on his hip. “No. It’s okay. Don-don’t hurt people.” You said holding his face with your small hands. He sighed, wiping your rosy cheeks of tears. “It will be quick. He won’t feel anything.” He said and you began crying again, diving back into the familiar shoulder. You felt your dad lean closer as the familiar sound of the gun cocked itself back.

“Sing for me, sweetheart.”

__________

KIM JUNGWOO (Had daughter when he was 16 - Married - 5 years)

You and your father are the pride of the family’s cuteness. You got all your cuteness from him. Your mother says you got everything from your dad. Your cuteness, innocence, pure heart and your stubbornness. You and your dad are usually inseparable and whenever one of your uncles need to unwind, they’ll go to you to play and let go f their stress; believing that this world was still full of innocence and peace. You were a prime example of it. Yet, you were still stubborn. If you didn’t wanna hear something, you flipped your hair and walked the other direction. Yet, it would get to you later on and become a cry baby. 

“Cry baby! Cry baby!” The older boys taunted you on the playground. “Am not!” You screamed back. “Yes you are, go cry to your daddy or something. This place is only for the best kids.” He said and pulled your hair. Your eyes pooled with tears and you ran away from the prk. You totally left your mom and dad sitting on the bench while you cried your eyes out. When you finally stopped and looked around and realised you were a long way from the park. 

As if someone read your mind, someone touched your shoulder. You looked back to see a woman. “Sweetie, are you lost?” She asked, and you nodded as you rubbed your eyes. “Here, how about you hop in my car and we could go back to the park?” She asked and you nodded. You followed inside her car and you sat up front. 

You drove a little bit and you noticed you had passed the park. “Wait...how did you know I was at the park?” You asked and she smirked. She reached below her seat and pulled out a gun, pointing it at you. Yet, you grabbed the gun and pointed it right back at her. She was definetley taken by surprise at your actions. “Take. Me. Back. Now.” You said and she rolled her eyes. 

“Huh...I wonder what would happen if I pressed this button.” You said, already knowing that your dad called it a ‘trigger’. “Okay okay fine.” she said screeching to the side of the road. She snatched the gun from your hands, and threw it in the backseat. You crossed your arms and cocked an eyebrow. “Go and tell your Daddy that Diana is waiting for him.” She said. “Yeah sure whatever.” You replied. 

“Just get out brat.” She said and you got out, running in the direction of the park. You eventually got to your parents where you told your dad the message. “Wait, you acted like that and she still let you go? Surprising. Good job baby girl.” He pinched your cheek, and was met with an abrupt slap to the back of the head by your mom. “If she continues to act like you, she’s gonna get herself killed.”

[taesugaar]

Game Over

Idol! Jungkook AU

We were in the waiting room, the boys were fooling around with their new hair colors. Jungkook’s hair was now blonde, I couldn’t deny that it suited it him, I’d be lying if I said it didn’t. Opening the app on my phone, I took a picture of him and sent it to my alternate account. At least that’s where I thought I sent it.

“what the hell is this Y/N?” Jungkook suddenly turned to me. He pulled up his phone in front of me, letting me see the picture I took moments before. “how did that-?” I quickly checked my phone, seeing that I had accidentally posted it on my story instead of sending it to myself.

“this is the fucking reason I rarely take you anywhere with me,” he started,”you’re so irresponsible! It’s like being with a goddamn child.”

“I didn’t mean it gguk, you know I would never-“ “you should leave. I can’t look at you right now, the company is gonna be so fucking pissed at me and it’s all your fault. So get OUT.” He said, turning his back on me. I could see Namjoon giving me a look of pity as he too, looked away.

Ever since then, Jungkook never really let me come with him anymore. Albeit when I buy my own ticket to concerts, the fans all noticed my mistake and have been ridiculing me for it.

I got a huge scolding from his manager after he had called me to his office, telling me that I shouldn’t meddle with their business.

I remembered the time where Jungkook was forced to tell the public about our relationship, our photo was taken and they wanted answers.

Weeks passed by and they were going on tour. I knew he didn’t want to take me along, clingy as he called it. We were never the same after I got backlash, the public deemed me irresponsible after the company had put out a statement that I had accidentally posted it.

He was mad at me because his manager was mad at him.

He’s been on tour for a month, I’ve tried calling him but as usual he doesn’t answer. The one time he did answer, he was pissed drunk and at a private club. I hanged up the call seeing the girls that were there with them.

I tried.

Y/N: Game Over Jungkook. I’m sorry.

Read.

You cannot respond to this message anymore.

There it was, I threw my phone off to the side looking down at the water below me. The bridge was empty, it was 2 in the morning.

“Game Over, maybe in the next life I’ll see you again.” I whispered into the air, hoping that it would carry on.

I fell.

Game Over.

Jungkook’s POV

Ah. Shit.

The hangover that I had was head-splitting, I swear I could feel a crack somewhere. My phone was blaring up, the brightness was blinding.

September 2, 2024

8:45am, Tuesday

Mom (12 Missed Calls, 2 Messages)

Dad (17 Missed Calls, 5 Messages)

Jaehyun (24 Missed Calls, 25 Messages)

Y/N (1 Message)

The first question that popped in my head was, why was Y/N brother messaging me?

The second one was, why were my PARENTS messaging me.

Before I could check everything, a frantic knock on my door snapped me out. I opened it up seeing Namjoon-hyung on the other side looking alarmed.

“have you seen the news?” was the first thing he asked me. “not even a good morning hyung?” I jested, his face remained stoic as he, “I’m not kidding gguk. You might have to sit down for it.”

“change your clothes hurry up, we have a meeting right now.” He told me as he hurried me to the bathroom.

Changing my clothes, he pulled me towards the practice room. I saw all of my hyungs there with gloomy faces that matched the managers.

“what happened? Why do you all look like someone died?” I joked around as Hobi-hyung winced.

“Jungkook-ah, I need to tell you something. Come and sit with me.” The manager told me as he took me to a corner of the room. Hobi-hyung was teary-eyed as he glared at me, walking out.

“how are you and Y/N gguk-ah?” the manager hyung asked. “we’re doing fine, hyung. What’s even going on you’re all acting weird.”

“Gguk, she… Y/N was found dead this morning, under the Mapo bridge..”

What?

“come on hyung, don’t joke like that. It isn’t funny.” I steeled at him as he looked at me with pity.

“hyung? Come on, you can tell me it’s a joke now. Look, I’m sorry I pranked you guys last week. But this joke of yours isn’t funny hyung.”

“gguk..”

“NO! She can’t be gone just like that hyung. I haven’t proposed to her yet. Sure we fought but that doesn’t mean she’s gone..”

“gguk.. it’s real.” Namjoon-hyung placed his hand on my shoulder.

“we arranged a flight back to the country, jungkook. We postponed the concert.” The manager told me before he stepped away. Leaving me and hyung there.

“no hyung, look she messaged me last night!” I told him showing him the unopened texts.

Y/N: Game Over Jungkook. I’m sorry.

“gguk..”

There it was, mocking me. I fell to my knees as I stared at the lone text on my screen.

“no. This has to be a joke right?”

“please?”

3rd person POV

There it was, the stages of grief..

Denial.

He stood there, looking at his hyungs. He denied the thought that she was gone.

“stop believing that hyungs! She’s not gone!”

“please stop telling me that.”

“stop looking at me like that! She’ll be there when we get home..” he cried, breaking down.

Anger.

He stared at the window of the plane as his hyung sat beside him.

“gguk..” “shut up, if I hear one more thing about her being gone I’ll fucking toss all of you out of this fucking plane.”

The glass shattered as he looked at the flight attendant who attempted to touch his knee in attempts to seduce the young one.

“I told you I fucking didn’t need anything! I have a girlfriend for fucks sakes so leave me the fuck alone!”

Depression

He looked at your face in the casket, you looked like you were just sleeping. Like you were going to wake up and tell him everything was okay.

He didn’t feel like getting up in the morning, he couldn’t see your good morning texts anymore.

He didn’t have anyone to bring him lunch or bug him to sleep.

He didn’t feel like eating, the food didn’t taste like anything. He wanted your cooking, the slightly burned pancakes or the small soggy piece of vegetable.

Bargaining

He didn’t believe in the almighty. But he sure as hell was praying to one now.

“take mine, give her back.”

“it isn’t her time yet, I haven’t proposed yet.”

“I haven’t told her how fucking sorry I am so please give her back.”

“give her back for a year or two, I can make sure that I’ll be good please..”

Acceptance..

After everything, life was grey.

Life would move on and forget about her. But he couldn’t. Instead, he kept her in mind.

He didn’t marry, he didn’t have hook-ups.

He loved her and only her in this lifetime.

He continued his career, being a single man.

In the end, he would meet her again. Either on the other side or in the next life.

He believed the she IS his soulmate.

He’ll stay true.

.Game Over.

[everlarkficexchange]

Prompt 41

Written by: @wendywobbles

Prompt 41: Everlark based off the Hallmark Christmas Movies Meme:  I still going to watch them and act surprised when she falls in love with the small town baker who only wears sweaters instead of falling for the big city CEO? Yes! Does not need to be Christmas time, but definitely end game Everlark                                              

Thanks for the prompt, @historywriter2007!

AN: I hope I do some justice to this for you and put a smile on your face….I’m not sure it’s Hallmark Christmas Movie enough so maybe make some hot chocolate and put on the Michael Buble Christmas playlist to help set the scene!

Peeta Mellark had moved to District 12 to take over his Nana Sae’s bakery.  Running the place had been his dream since he was kid. He remembered how Sae had introduced him to the wonders of baking from a very young age.  She lit a fire in him that time had never diminished. 

His dad, William was an only child and while he loved his mother dearly the life of a provincial baker was not for him so he left at 18 for a Capital college and studied Law graduating top of his class. He worked hard for the firm he started with and was made partner before he was thirty.  He met and married Isabella and together they had the picture perfect life-or at least it appeared that way.  They had three boys Jackson, Davis and Peeta.  Peeta has been a surprise addition and when Isabella had found out she was expecting she was convinced that this was her much longed for daughter.  So when her third son was born she was devastated. She took to her bed and refused to leave.  She showed no interest in the child not even choosing a name for him, but while William fretted he actually did little to help his wife to deal with this situation. Instead he continued going to work and hired a nanny to take care of his youngest child.

When Sae came to visit she could not believe that at three weeks old the child was still being referred to as Baby Mellark. She took her son aside and gave him what for, she visited her daughter in law and gave her what for and then she gave the child his name Peeta James Mellark.  Isabella scoffed but she said nothing else after all what did she care what the child was called really? 

Peeta grew up, aware that he was not like his brothers although he could not figure out why. His mother lavished attention on his older brothers while he was often ignored.  His father was away with work so didn’t see the cruel and spiteful ways Isabella would torment her youngest son, which included sending him out of the Capital to a Boarding School. 

Peeta loved District 12 and spent all his school holidays there with his Nana Sae, he rarely visited the Capital or his family there.  In 12 he learnt old family recipes, invented new ones. He told Sae of his hopes and fears, he told her about his first kiss, his first love (although looking back it was more like lust). It was Sae he told first that he was planning on going to culinary school and not following his brothers to law school.  It was Sae who encouraged him to keep going when his parents refused to pay his tuition and it was Sae who paid them. 

As she got older Sae sat him down and told him she wanted him to takeover the business but before he could he needed to go see the world. So he did. He travelled around Panem and then to Europe and Asia working in small family run  places and large upscale restaurants honing his skills and seeing this he had only ever dreamed about.  He met a girl he thought he’d marry. A formidable chef from London with a lively smile and they shared many of the same interests. They were the perfect couple according to their friends and despite a year of happiness he knew something was missing, the “spark” just wasn’t there, so it was with regret that he decided to part ways with Clove.  He kissed her one last time in Trafalgar Square on New Year’s Eve and knew after five years of travel and adventure he was ready to come home.

He headed first to District 12 to catch up with Nana Sae. He filled her in on all that had happened and plans were set that that he would go home and tie up lose ends before returning to take over the Bakery in 2 months.  Sae meanwhile would oversee the conversion of the floors above into an apartment for him to live.  But as with all the best plans it didn’t quite work out like that. 

Two days after he left William rang to tell his mother there had been a dreadful accident and Peeta was in hospital.  After coming to see his parents a row had broken out and Isabella had raged against her son telling him what a disappointment he had been, how she wished he had never been born. Her words cut Peeta deep, but he wasn’t surprised by them.  He turned to walk away when his mother in a fit of fury picked up a tray of glasses and bottles of alcohol and threw it against the wall. It smashed sending glass flying in all directions one  large piece caught Peeta in the leg and immediately he began to bleed and bleed badly. He heard his father cry out as he ran to his side.  Peeta’s last thought as he slipped into unconsciousness was that he had never experienced true love…….

He lost his leg.

They tried to save it they said.  

And so the move was delayed while Peeta attended rehab and adjusted to life with a prosthetic .

He dealt with feelings of rage and anger. Let them consume him. Eventually he realised that he couldn’t live like that, he sought help and worked through his demons.  Old Peeta was gone but new and improved bionic legged Peeta was ready to get back to his life.

He arrived into 12 on a crisp September morning.  He walked to the bakery and instantly he felt at home.

“Well old lady aren’t you going to give me a hug” he dropped his bag on the nearest table and opened his arms.

“Peeta! I wasn’t expecting you until tomorrow” cried Sae as came out from behind the counter and gave her grandson a hug “Let me look at you. You look well. So very good compared to last time I saw you. Now your furniture and stuff arrived and is upstairs. The additional rails have been fitted on the stairs and the bathroom modified”

“Good. That’s good” Peeta was no longer embarrassed by his leg and the adjustments that needed to be made to allow him to live his best life. 

September passed in a blur. Learning the ropes and adjusting to his new schedule took time but by October Sae felt comfortable enough to head to District 4 to visit her old friend Mags and leave Peeta alone.  This amused Peeta no end, he was adult but Sae seemed to forget that sometimes.

Peeta had begun to look at making changes to the place. He added new things to the menu. More variety and choices, specialised one of a kind occasion cakes and the addition of decent coffee had meant that Mellark’s was enjoying something of a renaissance. He had started to get to grips with some of Sae’s quirkier habits and had begun to introduce his own.

This included new opening hours.

Nana Sae only opened the bakery from 8am until the bread ran out, she was a one woman show for most of the time so this was suited her.  With Peeta the hours were 7.30am to 4.30pm Monday to Saturday with 9.30am to 12.30pm Sunday.  He needed staff 2 full timers and maybe 2 part timers and although right now he could handle the baking, but he was considering taking on an apprentice.

He talked to Sae after Halloween, he found that she agreed and so they set to work looking for help and filled the full time positions. Sae suggested he get in touch with Katniss Everdeen out at Prim’s Roses to see if she knew anyone who might be worth considering.   He was vaguely aware of Prim’s Roses.  It was on the other side of town that was part drop in centre and part residential for local college kids. He actually wasn’t to sure what it was -a sorority maybe- but he trusted Sae so he called ahead, explained who he was and arranged to meet with the head of the place, a Ms Katniss Everdeen.

***********************

He arrived for their meeting a little earlier than he needed to be there and parked up in the drive way of a large two storey house with a porch.  The garden was small but well looked after. He looked around taking it in, it really was a lovely place and had a nice feel to it- welcoming and friendly.  He walked up to the two steps and knocked on the door. 

The door swung open and there stood a petite woman about his age he guessed, with long dark hair, currently pulled into a messy bun, she had eyes like liquid silver and lightly tanned skin and smattering of freckles across the bridge of her nose.  “Yes?”

“Oh hey, my name is Peeta Mellark I’m here to see Ms Everdeen?”

“Oh right, right. Hi I’m Ms Everdeen  come in. I’ll just bring you into the office.  Johanna?”

A short spiky haired woman appeared and raised an eyebrow.

“This is Mr Mellark, I’m going to have a quick chat with him.  Can you keep an eye on things?”

They went into a small room which housed a number filing cabinets, a desk, some mismatched chairs, an old computer that had seen better days and walls that were covered in pictures and photographs of girls in their late teens early twenties, smiling, graduating, some with kids and partners even pictures of  =pets. Each picture was different but  the same, all had a happiness in them that just seeped.

“So what brings you here?” Katniss got straight to the point as she gestured at one of the chairs for him to sit into.

“Well I run the bakery, Sae is my grandmother and I’ve taken over, we are looking for staff some part-time workers and Sae suggested I get in touch.  I guess because you are a sorority-“

“Mr Mellark Prim’s Roses is not a sorority.  We help girls transition from being in the care system and into the  world.  . For some being in care is all they  have ever known and they are wholly unprepared to live in the real world as it were.  Some want to go to college, others go straight to work, some don’t know what lies ahead. Here they get time, guidance and learn life skills” she said back in her chair and looked at him.

“Oh…right…ok…. I take it Prim was a person? And the “Roses” bit of the name is because like a rose  these girls need a bit of extra time and attention to flourish, but sometimes they come across as hard and have an inbuilt natural defensiveness to keep people away, kind of like thorns?” Peeta stopped why on EARTH had he even said that!!!!

Katniss stared at him, he had gotten the point of the name immediately. Most people just thought it was a play on her sister’s name. “Yes well most people don’t think too much about the name, other then to comment on how pretty it is. My sister and I were place in one of Panem’s Community homes after our parents passed away. I was  twelve and Prim was eight. At eighteen I aged out and left the system and the home. I wanted to take my sister with me but a very wise man I met in the Homes sat me down and made me go through my options.  The reality was I couldn’t take responsibility for Prim at that point in time.  I adapted to life outside that routine well but when Prim turned eighteen  she struggled. I was able to help her to get herself organised. For Prim that meant deferring  Med School until she was more confident in making her own choices and decisions. We discussed how useful having a person to help you through the first few months like I had been able to do for her.  And here we are.”

“Prim is currently in her first year of residency at a hospital in District 8 and what started as a conversation over a glass of milk has turned into this place.  When you age out the system, particularly one as controlled as Panem’s even the act of opening your own bank account can seem like huge deal, not to mention the problems from childhood don’t just disappear overnight.  Along with practical skills, like budgeting,  small things learning to change a lightbulb, we help girls navigate the mountains of red tape that exists and can stop them from accessing birth records and passports or even applying for driving licences. We also help them to link in with counselling-for some it’s grief counselling, other may require more long term medical interventions.  We do what we can to help.  We have successes but we also have failures but an old mentor once told me that failures can be viewed as learning experiences, everyone fails at some point, just keep trying don’t let it defeat you.  Granted to an 18 year old this probably seems like an awful motto . So why are you here?”

“Your girls- I’m sorry what should I call them?” Peeta wanted to make sure she knew he wasn’t here  to disrespect anyone.

“Girls is fine, for now” she smiled.

“Ok, would there be any interest in anyone applying for the jobs at the bakery?”

“I think so, part time positions?”

“Yes, initially although who knows what the future holds?” he smiled “I really admire what you are doing here. It’s fantastic really.  If there is anything else I can do to help you guys out please just give me a shout.  May I?” He indicated to a post-it pad and pen lying nearby and with Katniss agreement he wrote out his contact information.

“Mr Mellark, thank you so much for stopping by.  I’ll talk to everyone this evening and have anyone interested submit a CV?”

“It’s Peeta and yes that would be perfect” he stuck out his hand to shake hers, and when then touched he was jolted by something. She pulled back her hand clearly she had felt it too.

“Oww flaming static, I’m always the same” Katniss smirked “and Peeta you can call me Katniss”

They walked out to the front door just as Johanna appeared “Hey Kat, Gale Hawthorne of Hawthorne Electrics has just called. He saw you speak at a charity event and he wants to talk to you about funding”

“Wow Ms Everdeen- sorry Katniss you clearly have friends in high places.  I’ll leave you too it, and next time your in town drop in and say hi there’s a hot chocolate in it for you”

Before she could answer Johanna called out “Promise to Irish that hot chocolate up and I will definitely pop in Blondie”

And that was how Peeta met Katniss.  And Johanna.

********************

In the course of just a few week Katniss and Peeta became good friends, despite the fact that they were completely opposite in many ways:

He liked art. She didn’t see the point.

He was a morning person.  She was not.

She was hot headed. He was calm.

She could sit for hours quietly. He was a chatter box.

He had the patience to complete intricate cake designs creating masterpieces from just sugar, water and food colouring.  She was good at eating his cakes the decorating part no so much he let her once, never again.

He liked tea, she drank coffee.

Her childhood before her parents had passed away had been happy, Peeta’s had not.  Katniss hated that Peeta had had such a rough time but loved that he still say goodness in  the world.

She never wanted to get married. He did.

He wanted kids, she didn’t

She loved Halloween, he loved Christmas, and now that December was on the way he was getting down to the serious business of choosing Christmas sweaters for his staff.

She had the voice of an angel, he did not.

But for each difference they had many things is common.  They were hard workers, kind hearted, generous, giving, they enjoyed 1980’s movies of any kind and a love of Gordon Ramsey that bordered on obsessional.

******************************

Peeta had hired Rue and Glenda-or Glimmer- as she insisted on being called- from Prim’s Roses. Rue was attending college studying Computer Science. Glimmer didn’t know what she wanted to do and quite by accident they discovered that Glimmer has a knack for cooking, even old Sae was impressed. Glimmer had an incredible natural palate and talent that most chefs could only dream of.  Peeta and Katniss helped her to apply for culinary schools, and looked at the various options to fund this for her. She was accepted to school in District 2 but although she had received funding to cover the cost and had received  a small stipend when she has aged out of the system she still had to figure where she was going to live and then work so she should could look after rent and bills.

Peeta remembered an old buddy of his had a place in  2 and put in a call.  Cato immediately offered up a solution. He was short staffed so she could work at his bar/restaurant part time. Initially a waitress position but he could give her some kitchen work as well.  Katniss called Enobaria Lewis who she knew ran a similar project to hers in District 2 and explained the situation.  A couple of days later she had a room in a shared house to offer Glimmer.  The other tenants were of similar age and background. Sae paid for Glimmer to out to meet Enobaria and the other girls to see if they “clicked” after all she was moving so far away. Sae had a huge soft spot of Glimmer and she was worried “her baby girl” would get there and everyone would hate each other and Glimmer would be stuck. Luckily they all hit it off. College didn’t start until January but Glimmer decided to move to 2 more or less straight away she could start work full time, earn some cash, get to grips the with city and be completely settled in by start of the course.                                                                                      

*************************************************

Right now Peeta and Johanna were sitting in the living room of the Prim’s Roses house listening to Katniss practice the presentation she would be delivering in two days to the Board of Hawthorne Electronics. 

Gale Hawthorne had been in touch and then arrived into District 12 for a one to one meeting with Katniss three days after Peeta had met Katniss to discuss funding for Prim’s Roses.  Katniss was taken aback by the gorgeous man that stood in front of her.  He was tall, had dark hair, grey curious eyes and when  he smiled his face changed so much he looked younger more, carefree.

 They had quickly got down to business he told her the Hawthorne Electronics was interested in providing her and her organisation with funding to help her grow,  They needed new equipment, additional space and to increase the supports to the service users and  they would like to back them. Gale had a quick mind and asked all kinds of questions but Katniss was able to answer them. 

“Katniss, you present like this it the Board and I can’t see how they can refuse you. They will love you”

Katniss was beaming and then Gale has asked her out. She said yes.

Gale was the perfect partner for Katniss. He loved the outdoors and hunting so the house was well stocked with meat for the coming months. He had a drive to match her own. He loved his family and they were the main driving force for him to succeed.

Although sometimes he wasn’t the most observant  and didn’t really listen. Like the time he bought her a new jacket to replace the old leather one she wore. She thanked him but politely told him to take it back , explaining once more that her current jacket belonged to her father and she wasn’t ready to let it go just yet.

When he kissed her, Katniss first thought was “Well this is nice” her second was “Who describes their first kiss with her boyfriend as nice?” she brushed it aside.   Katniss relationship with Gale was easy she knew not every relationship was fireworks and drama. They lived so far apart and they weren’t  living in each other’s pockets that it suited Katniss. Sometimes their only contact was a few text message a few times a day, but that was normal right?

Now with days to go before the big presentation Katniss was a ball of nerves.

“Katniss you will be amazing. They will love you.  You speak from the heart but you have all the facts and figures, research results and testimonies to back up what you’re trying to do.  If they pass up an opportunity to partner with you then they are fools” Peeta stood up and pulled her into a hug, again they were blasted by static.

“Mellark! Will you take off that awful polyester Christmas jumper when you touch me me it’s like hugging an electric fence”

Johanna snorted “Ah leave him alone I happen to think he looks positively festivetastic in that”

A knock on the front door interrupted them.  Katniss answered it and there stood Gale a large bunch of roses in his arms. “Hey babe” he said as he leaned in to kiss her “I thought maybe you could come to the city with me a day early let me show you around before the meeting? Here these are for you. Roses being your favourite after all” he gestured round as he said this.

“Erm Gale I can’t just leave. I have things that need to do before I go. I’m sorry but this was a wasted trip for you”

“Can’t Jo look after things?” Gale dismissed her concerns.

“No. Absolutely not.  Gale if you have free time why don’t you stay in District 12 and then travel up with me tomorrow night?”

“Great idea babe, I’ll grab my stuff”

“Gale you can’t stay here.  Seriously, we’ve been through this, it isn’t appropriate while I live under the same roof as the girls. Book into the hotel in town I’ll swing by later if I get time if not I will meet you for breakfast” she leaned up and kissed him.

“Fine” Gale snapped and walked away.

Katniss looked at the roses and then at Johanna “Please get rid of these.  I absolutely hate the things”

Peeta laughed at her “Poor fella, he should have just brought you some dandelions they are your favourite after all. Right to the kitchen we have a cooking class to teach” Peeta had taken to giving lessons to anyone interested in learning to cook.  He was teaching them how to make nutritious meals but that were low cost. He was also showing them some no cook ideas.  They classes were proving a hit.  Even Katniss was learning something.

****************************************

The presentation went better than planned and plans were in motion for funding to start in the New Year. 

The night after celebrating Gale told Katniss he loved her.  She was stunned. Did she love him? She respected him, enjoyed his company, they had fun, kissing him was ok and the couple of times they had “made love” as he insisted on calling it had been nice-he didn’t make the earth move but so that stuff was overrated right(if she was being honest no man she has ever slept with had rocked her world) Maybe it was love? So she smiled and said “Ditto” he laughed and told her she was so cute.

****************************************

With a week to go to Christmas District 12 was blaze of festive colour. Peeta had gotten the local vendors to agree to contribute money toward new lights and  to put  a giant tree being up in the town square. Shop fronts were painted, there was Carollers singing  dressed in what she assumed was Dickens style clothing all bonnets and hats.  In Katniss opinion it looked like Christmas itself had vomited on the town.

Gale and her were walking along hand in hand stopping here and there to look at this and that, and Katniss was content.  Gale was the perfect boyfriend, everyone said so.  Prim who was in town for a few days was bowled over by the charming, educated, wealthy Mr Hawthorne and declared he was a vast improvement on Katniss last boyfriend Darius.  They were heading to Mellark’s to grab some hot chocolate before heading back to the house.   Gale was particularly keen to get back to the house. 

When then entered the bakery Katniss was overwhelmed by the scent of ginger and cinnamon.  It smelt just like Christmas should.  She waved to Rue and Diana, who had replaced Glimmer. Peeta had opened up the interior a bit more since taking over so people could sit and have coffee. He told Katniss he planned to do more as time went on but for now he was happy at the pace things were going. Peeta came through from the kitchen with fresh cookies and Stollen muffins, he nodded at Katniss and Gale. Gale returned his nod Katniss waved and asked him if he had a minute.

“Hey guys how are you?” Peeta walked towards them Katniss noticed he was limping slightly.

“We’re good but you by the looks of things haven’t been looking after yourself properly? Are you getting enough rest?  Did you fall asleep last night without taking your leg off? “Katniss asked.

Gale’s head swivelled to look at Peeta “You have one leg?!” he blurted out

Peeta snorted laughing “Yep, you didn’t know? I’m part bionic so don’t ever challenge me to a race I’ll easily beat you”

“Stop teasing him Peeta and let me introduce you to Primrose my sister” she waved to Prim would was currently shoving a muffin in her face.

“Oh my god Katniss…this stuff is amazing…”

“Thanks glad you like it. I’m Peeta the maker of those amazing muffins”

They chatted for a bit until Gale cleared his throat and told Katniss they needed to go.  As they turned to leave Rue whistled and pointed about Peeta’s head  where a piece of mistletoe was hanging.  “You know the rules” she giggled.

Gale laughed and kissed Peeta on the check, then Diana called out to Katniss “Come on you’re more under it then Gale give Peeta a kiss”

The was absurd thought Katniss but she leaned in and went to place a kiss on his cheek, Prim was laughing and pushed Katniss, she stumbled and her kiss landed closer to his lips then she intended.

And there it was that spark of static again but this time with the jolt images that shot through her head: a wedding, laying in a meadow with Peeta plaiting her hair, two children one dark, one blond, she pulled back from Peeta the confusion she felt was mirrored in his eyes.

“Ok, well bye” they both said at the same time.

Peeta practically ran back to the kitchen wondering what the hell had just happened?

Meanwhile Katniss walked out the door wondering exactly the same thing.

*****************************

When they got back to the Prim’s Roses house, Gale was giddy like a child and Katniss was distracted.  He sat her down and began a speech about although they had only known each other a short time, he was certain she was “the one” and he wanted to give her something.

“Hmmmm what sorry Gale? What’s one?”

“Aren’t you listening  I said you’re the one. The one for me. We are physically and emotionally compatible and well I don’t see the point in waiting I am a man who goes after what he wants. So Katniss Everdeen will you marry me?” Gale stood there with a yellow gold ring with a huge pear cut diamond.  It was beautiful but it wasn’t her. She looked Gale in the eye and shook her head.

“I’m sorry Gale no, I can’t if I accept I will be condemning us both to live half a life. You are wonderful, truly wonderful but you need to find someone who makes you spark. Do you know what I mean?”

“Yes. I think I do” he sat down beside her “On paper we’re perfect but the reality is not so good. I think we might be better friends than life partners”

Katniss laughed “Gale, that exactly my point I don’t want to be a “life partner” it all sounds a bit businessy when you say it.  You deserve the world and you won’t get it with me. As your friend though can I give you one tip? They next time you propose to someone and you have to describe the two of you “as physically and emotionally compatible” stop and run away. They are not the one for you either”

He looked at her and the two of them burst out laughing.

A short time later Gale got ready to leave. He  told Katniss he would be in touch regarding the funding and he would like if possible to look at bringing the Prim’s Roses model to other areas to help young men and women adjust to life after care.

News of the break up spread, Katniss wasn’t too upset.  Peeta asked her about it.  She felt weird talking to him but she told him the truth that there just wasn’t enough between them to grow a relationship.

Things continued as they had always done Peeta helped out when he could, Katniss regularly visited for free hot chocolate. They didn’t mention the kiss at Christmas time . Rare night off together were spent watching Masterchef US and bad 80’s movies.  With the additional funding Katniss was able to hire some new staff one of her first hires was a young Social Worker called  Leevy who was one of the first girls to come through Prim’s Roses doors.  She was a great fit for the place.

Gale rang Katniss six weeks after the break up and told her he had met someone.  She laughed when he told her that when they kissed for the first time he would swear fireworks were going off.

On the night before Valentine’s Day Katniss sat on Peeta couch watching that most romantic of movies “The Goonies” and she realised how absolutely content she felt, she reached to grab some popcorn just as Peeta did and their hands touched, there was that jolt again only this time she didn’t pull away and neither did he.

 The never made it to the end of the movie.

But Katniss did discover that night that with the right person the earth really can move.

As for Peeta  well Peeta finally experienced true love firstly with Katniss and then three years later when their twins were born, a raven haired girl and a little boy with a mass of blond curls.

[taylorftparamore]

YOU CUT OUT ALL TOO WELL??????

i mean... starting from debut, let’s show all the bridges that got cut that definitely didn’t deserve to be cut but y’all let them get cut anyway, hm?

“you never did give a damn thing honey but i cried, cried for you. and i know you wouldn’t have told nobody if i’d die, die for you, die for you.” (cold as you)

“if you and i are a story that never gets told, if what you are is a daydream then at least you’ll know.” (stay beautiful)

“you stood there in the doorway my hand shake, i’m not usually this way. you pull me in and i’m a little more brave, it’s the first kiss, it’s flawless, it’s really somethin. it’s fearless.” (fearless)

“when all you wanted was to be wanted, wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now. back then i swore i was gonna marry him but i realized some bigger dreams of mine. and abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind, we both cried.” (fifteen)

“i got tired of waitin, wonderin if you were ever comin around. my faith in you was fadin. when i met you on the outskirts of town, and i said, ‘romeo, save me. i’ve been feelin so alone. i keep waitin for you but you never come.’ he knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring.” (love story)

“they’re dimmin the streetlights, you’re perfect for me, why aren’t you here tonight? i’m waitin alone now so come out and pull me near and shine, shine, shine. hey stephen, i could give you fifty reasons why i should be the one you chose. all those other girls, well, they’re beautiful, but would they write a song for you?” (hey stephen)

“and there you on your knees, begging for forgiveness, beggin for me. just like i always wanted, but i’m so sorry.” (white horse)

“i remember you drivin to my house in the middle of the night, i’m the one who makes you laugh when you know you’re bout to cry. and i know your favorite songs and you tell me bout your dreams, think i know where you belong, think i know it’s with me.” (you belong with me)

“i have an excellent father, his strength is making me stronger got smiles on my little brother, inside and out he’s better than i am. i grew up in a pretty house and i had space to run and i had the best day... with you. there is a video i found round back when i was three. you set up a paint set in the kitchen and you’re talkin to me. it’s the age of princess and the seven dwarves. my daddy’s smart and you’re the prettiest lady in the whole wide world. now i know why all the leaves change in the fall.” (the best day, typing this one out made me fuckin CRY, bitch how DARE y’all cut this one)

“i run my fingers through your hair and watch the lights go wild. just keep on keeping your eyes on me, it’s just wrong enough to make it feel right. and lead me up the staircase, won’t you whisper something slow? i’m captivated by you, baby, like a fireworks show.” (sparks fly)

“i miss your tan skin, your sweet smile, so good to me, so right. and how you held me in your arms that september night, the first time you ever saw me cry. maybe this is wishful thinkin, probably mindless dreamin, but if we loved again i swear i’d love you right. i’d go back in time and change it, but i can’t. so if the chain is on your door, i understand. (back to december)

“take pictures in your childhood room, memorize what it sounded like when your dad gets home. remember the footsteps, remember the words said and the words to all your little brother’s favorite songs. i just realized everything i ever had is someday gonna be gone. so here i am in my new apartment in the big city, they just dropped me off. it’s so much colder than i thought it would be so i tuck myself in and turn my night light on. wish i’d never grown up.” (never grow up)

“time turns flames to embers, you’ll have new septembers, everyone of us has messed up too. lives change like the weather, i hope you remember today is never too late to be brand new.” (innocent)

“so i’ll watch your life in pictures like i used to watch sleep and i feel you forget me like i used to watch you breathe. and i’ll keep up with your old friends just to ask how you are. hope it’s nice where you are. (last kiss)

“this is the state of grace. this is the worthwhile fight. love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right. these are the hands of fate. you’re my achilles’ heel. this is the golden age of something good and right and real.” (state of grace)

“remembering him comes in flashbacks and echos. tell myself ‘it’s time now’, gotta let him go. but movin on from him isn’t possible when i still see it all in my head, burnin red.” (red)

“two headlights shine through the sleepless night, and i will get you, get you alone. your name has echoed through my mind and i just think you should, think you should know that nothing safe is worth the drive and i will follow you, follow you home. i’d follow you, follow you home.” (treacherous)

“oh, we made quite a mess, babe. it’s probably better off this way. and i confess, babe, in my dreams you’re touching my face and asking me if i want to try again. and i almost do.” (i almost do)

“you took the time to memorize me, my fears, my hopes, my dreams i just like hanging out with you all the time. all those times that you didn’t leave it’s been occurring to me that i’d like to hang out with you all the time, stay.” (stay stay stay)

“it was a few years later i showed up here and they still the legend of how you disappeared. how you took the money and your dignity and got the hell out. they say you bought a bunch of land somewhere, chose the rose garden over madison square. and it took some time, but i understand it now. (the lucky one)

“what do you say when tears are streaming down your face in front of everyone you know? and what do you do when the one who means the most to you is the one that didn’t show?” (the moment i knew)

“this is falling in love in the cruelest way. this is falling for you when you are worlds away. new york, be here. but you’re in london and i break down cause it’s not fair that you’re not around.” (come back... be here...)

i feel the “you cut all too well” loses weight when y’all let EIGHT tracks from red get cut. let’s keep going regardless, cause y’all let some GOOD 1989, reputation, and lover bridges get cut.

“your kiss, my cheek, i watch you leave. your smile, my ghost, i fell to my knees. when you’re young you just run but you come back to what you need.” (this love)

“they are the hunters, we are the foxes. and we run. just grab my hand and don’t ever drop it, my love.” (i know places)

“ten months sober i must admit, just because you’re clean don’t mean you don’t miss it. ten months older, i won’t give in. now that i’m clean i’m never gonna risk it.” (clean)

“i reached for you but you were gone. i knew i had to go back home. you search the world for something else to make you feel like what we had but in the end in the wonderland we both went mad.” (wonderland)

“please take my hand and please take me dancing and please leave me stranded, it’s so romantic.” (new romantics)

“they’re burning all the witches even if you aren’t one. they got their pitchforks and proof, their receipts and reasons. they’re burning all the witches even if you aren’t one, so light me up. go ahead and light me up, light me up, light me up, light me up. go ahead and light me up, light me up, light me up.” (i did something bad)

“they’re burning all the witches even if you aren’t one. they got their pitchforks and proof, their receipts, they don’t need their proof. they’re burning all the witches and it’s just for fun. so light me up! light me up! light me up! light me up, light me up, go ahead and light me....” (i did something bad tour version)

“i don’t trust nobody and nobody trusts me, i’ll be the actress starrin in your bad dreams. i don’t trust nobody and nobody trusts me, i’ll be the actress starring in your bad dreams. i’m sorry, the old taylor can’t come to the phone right now. why? oh! cause she’s dead.” (look what you made me do)

“you did a number on me but honestly, baby, who’s countin? i did a number on you, but honestly, baby, who’s countin? who’s countin? 1, 2, 3, and all the pieces fall” (so it goes...)

“we were jet set bonnie and clyde, til i switched to the other side, the other side. it’s no surprise i turned you in cause us traitors never win. i’m in a getaway car. i left you in the motel bar. put the money in the bag and i stole the keys, that was the last time you ever saw me.” (getaway car)

“i’d kiss you as the lights go down, swaying as the room burned down. i’d hold you as the water rushes if i could dance with you again. i’d kiss you as the lights go down, swaying as the room burned down, i’d hold you as the water rushes in if i could dance with you again.” (dancing with our hands tied)

“flashback when you met me with your buzzcut and my hair bleached, even in the worst times you could see the best of me. flashback to my mistakes, my rebounds, my earthquakes even in my worst lies you could see the truth in me. and i woke up in just in time. now i wake up by your side. my one and only, my lifeline, and i woke up just in time, now i wake up by your side. my hands shake, i can’t explain this ah ah, ah” (dress)

“i want to wear his initial on a chain round my neck, chain round my neck not because he owns me but cause he really knows which is more than they can say. i recall late november, holdin my breath, slowly i said, ‘you don’t need to save me, but would you run away with me?’ yes.” (call it what you want)

“would you please stand? with every guitar string scar on my hand, i take this magnetic force of man to be my lover. my heart’s been borrowed and yours had been blue, all’s well that ends well to end up with you. swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover. and you’ll save all your dirtiest jokes for me. and at every table, i’ll save you a seat, lover.” (lover)

“what’s it like to brag about rakin in dollars and getting bitches and models? and it’s all good if you’re bad and it’s okay if you’re mad? if i was out flashin my dollars, i’d be a bitch not a baller. they paint me out to be bad so it’s okay that i’m mad.” (the man)

“cause they see right through me, they see right through me, they see right through me. can you see right through me? they see right through, they see right through me. i see right through me! i see right through me! all the kings horse and all the king’s men couldn’t put me back together again, cause all of my enemies started out friends, help me hold on to you.” (the archer)

“lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh, we can follow the sparks, i’ll drive. lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh, we can follow the sparks, i’ll drive. so where we gonna go? i whisper in the dark. where we gonna go? i think he knows.” (i think he knows)

“i want to drive away with you, i want your complications too, i want your dreary mondays, wrap your arms around me, baby boy. i want to drive away with you, i want your complications too, i want your dreary mondays, wrap your arms around me, baby boy.” (paper rings)

“and i hate to make this about me, but who am i supposed to talk to if there’s no you? this won’t go back to normal, if it ever was. it’s been years of hopin and i keep sayin it cause i have to.” (soon you’ll get better)

like you’re telling me out of ALL THESE SONGS that got cut, all too well’s bridge is the only one worth being outraged about? grow up.

[thisdiscontentedwinter]

Baby Daddy - Chapter 10

You can find it here on AO3, or the Tumblr Chapter Index here. 

Laura calls Peter as soon as she gets home to the loft and finds the note that Derek left for her. It takes Peter less than ten minutes to arrive.

“What the hell do you mean he’s gone?” he asks, striding inside and slamming the door shut behind him. “The Argents could be on their way back here already! We need to stick together, not wander off and get picked off one by one!”

Laura shows him the note.

Peter stares at it, and then shakes his head. “What the hell happened?”

Laura’s eyes sting. “I don’t know!”

“I thought we were all on the same page,” Peter says. He pinches the bridge of his nose and draws in a breath. “Have you called him?”

“He’s not answering. I think his phone is switched off.”

“Leave him messages,” Peter instructs. “Tell him you need him back here. You’re his alpha and his sister, and you need him back here. I don’t care what sort of guilt trip you need to put him on, understand? It has to be bigger than the one he’s put himself on. If he’s out there alone, he’s not safe.”

Laura tugs her phone out of her pocket, her hand trembling.

“You’re his alpha,” Peter reminds her. “Use it!”

***

Several hours later Derek still isn’t answering, and Laura doesn’t know what to do except keep trying. When his mailbox is too full to accept any more voice messages, she continues to send texts telling him to come home.

Peter, meanwhile, paces back and forth in front of the windows.

He’s called Satomi Ito, in the hopes that if Derek tries to get through her territory, she’ll stop him and call Laura and Peter to come and collect him. It’s a good plan, but it’s not foolproof. If Derek’s hopped on a bus or hitchhiked in some stranger’s car he could already be halfway to Sacramento.

Laura draws a deep breath and tries to focus on their pack bond. She can feel Peter’s restless energy thrumming like a guitar string somewhere in her core. It resonates perfectly with her own anxiety.

And she can feel Derek’s bond as well—a sour-tinged note of stress and guilt and pain. Laura can’t remember their bond feeling this wrong since the fire, and she has no idea what’s caused this sudden change. She’d thought, like Peter, that they were all on the same page.

Is it possible that Derek has seen Kate again? Is it possible that he thinks he can draw her away from the pack? It seems like the sort of self-sacrificing bullshit Derek would think he should attempt. Or, worse, what he would think that he deserves.

Laura has failed him as an alpha. She knows that now. Her little brother should never have carried the burden of his guilt and pain for so many years alone simply because Laura didn’t know how to ask him to share it. She’d assumed that he could shed it alone, and she had been so, so wrong about that. She’d assumed that this was just who Derek was now, who they were as a pack, and she’d been wrong. If they hadn’t come back and found Peter alive, if she’d continued on without his guidance, how much more hurt would she have been heaping onto Derek’s head?

She wonders how Mom would have handled something like this, but all that thought does is throw her own deficiencies into sharp relief. Talia Hale would never have let one of her betas slip so far from her. Never.

She tries to draw on her pack bond with Derek, to call him back to her and to reassure him at the same time. But her pack bonds aren’t as strong as they should be. There are too few of them, and they are too thin and strained. She thinks she gets a sense of a third bond, new and fragile and faint, and presses her hand against the slight bulge in her abdomen.

Her phone buzzes, and Laura’s heart skips an anxious beat. She looks at her screen, and discovers it’s a text message from Stiles: Hey, so my dad wants to know if he can have your uncle Peter’s phone number? He wants to ask him some things about the fire.

And then, a moment later, she gets: Sorry. Shit. There was no real way to ease into that. Call me?

It’s totally out of the blue, and Laura hasn’t got time to worry about it right now, on top of Derek. She slides her phone back into her pocket. She’ll call him back later.

“Not your brother?” Peter asks.

Laura shakes her head. “Stiles. His father is the sheriff. He wants to talk to you.”

“Well,” Peter says flippantly. “That’s a conversation I’ll be sure to avoid!”

Laura watches as he starts to pace again.

“He did this when he was small, do you remember? Derek did.” Peter’s smile is strained. “You had a fight, and he broke some toy of yours. An accident, probably, because the pup never had a malicious bone in his body, but he felt so bad he packed his little Ben 10 bag and ran away into the Preserve.”

Laura feels the memory stirring. It aches, but not in an unpleasant way.

“He must have been four or five,” Peter says. “He didn’t get far. Your mother had the whole pack out looking for him, but it was raining, and almost impossible to catch his scent. I found him curled up at the bottom of a tree, like a little squirrel. He cried the whole way home because he thought you would be so mad about the toy, but I think you’d already forgotten it. I think that was probably the moment when I realised he’d never be your left hand and that I’d need to look elsewhere to train up my replacement.”

“Cora?” Laura asks, her breath hitching over her sister’s name.

“I think so,” Peter says softly. “She was a little hellion, wasn’t she?”

Old grief, soft and quiet, settles over the loft, and Laura closes her eyes briefly.

She flashes them open again when the window behind Peter shatters, and the loft fills rapidly with choking smoke.

***

“No!” Peter grabs at Laura’s shirt as she makes her way toward the door. “The roof!”

He pushes her in front of him as they hurry up the winding steps toward the top floor. The smoke burns, and Laura tries not to breathe it in. It must be laced with wolfsbane; she feels dizzy and weak, disoriented.  

Peter shoves her into her bedroom and clams the door behind her. He drags the pillows off her bed and pushes them into the gap under the door.

Laura hurries toward the window, and to the creaking fire escape she used to sit on to smoke.

Peter grabs her again. “No!”

He positions himself between her and the window.

“Peter,” she says softly.

“Usually I’m a fan of ladies first,” he tells her with a smirk. “Not so much in this case.”

Because of course. If they’re under attack, then the Argents will be watching all the exits. Even the fire escape. Isn’t that exactly what they did eight years ago?

“When we hit the fire escape,” Peter tells her. “Go up. Aim for the roof. It’s a hell of a jump between here and the next building, but you can do it, you hear me?”

Laura nods, blinking back tears.

“You are the alpha,” Peter says. He brushes his knuckles gently against her swelling belly. “You are carrying the future of this pack. You willmake the jump.”

“I can do it,” Laura says with more confidence than she feels.

“Good girl.” Peter’s smile slips. “They weren’t meant to find us here. They were meant to find my apartment, not this place. I’ve been leaving breadcrumbs on rental agreements and voting roles for months. They must have followed me here though.”

Laura’s phone buzzes in her pocket. She grasps Peter’s hand tightly.

“I’m sorry, Lulu,” he says. He leans forward and presses a kiss to her forehead. “You’ll make the jump for me, won’t you?”

“Yes.” Laura blinks, and tears slide down her cheeks. She’s glad Derek’s not here. She doesn’t think it would make a difference. “I’ll make the jump.”

“That’s my girl,” Peter says, and steps forward to open the window. “Let’s go!”

He leaps out onto the fire escape, his beta shift taking over.

Laura is right behind him.

Right behind him as she hears the sudden burst of shots—the hunters are using silencers, but Laura can still hear every single distinct pop of the gunfire from the landing below them. She can hear footsteps on the fire escape steps below; boots ringing on metal.

“Up!” Peter roars, his body jerking back as he’s hit. He lurches forward towards the narrow steps, roaring at the men below them, a shield and a distraction at once. “Go!”

Laura hauls herself up the ladder toward the roof. She hits it, and starts to run.

***

Another memory.

Peter chasing her around the yard. She must have been eight or nine, no older, and she was fast for her age, but Peter was faster. She had a stitch in her side, and it hurt, and she didn’t want to play anymore.

“No!” she yelled at him. “Stop! It’s not fun anymore!”

“Keep running!” he told her, his eyes flashing. “Run!”

“I don’t want to!”

In the end her yelling and her tears brought Mom out into the yard.

“Peter, what the hell are you doing?”

And then Peter was all smiles, showing his palms, pretending that it was no big deal. “We were just having fun, Talia.”

“He-h-he wouldn’t let me stop running!” Laura sobbed, feeling vindicated by her mother’s sympathy.

“Peter!” Mom exclaimed again, pulling Laura in for a hug. “What the hell is wrong with you? She’s upset! What sort of game were you playing?”

“The sort of game that might save her life one day.”

Mom hugged Laura tighter. “Just stop. Stop it! She’s a child! She’s not as strong as you!”

“Which is why she needs to be faster!” Peter said, his lip curling.

“Keep your bullshit away from the kids, Peter!” Talia snapped, drawing Laura inside to be consoled with ice cream and chocolate chip cookies.

And Laura, vindictive in her victory, had turned around to smirk at Peter as she’d been ushered inside.

But Peter hadn’t looked annoyed at all, or even ashamed at being put in his place by his alpha. Instead, his expression was drawn, as though he wasn’t angry at what Mom had done, but almost as though he was sad.

And that hadn’t made any sense at all to Laura at that age.  

But it was the first time that Laura had realised just how different a left hand was, and just how differently they were taught to see the world.

***

Laura looks back once. Smoke is curling over the edges of the rooftop.

Peter is no longer behind her.

She can hear sirens in the distance, getting closer.

The wolfsbane has weakened her, but she has to try.

She runs toward the edge of the roof, putting all of her strength into the jump.

She thinks of the small life she’s carrying inside her, and how she refuses to let it end before it even really begins. She sucks in a lungful of clean air, and leaps off the roof of the building, her hair whipping around her face, her arms outstretched.

For a moment she thinks she’s not going to make it, but she catches herself on the edge of the rooftop of the building next door, and hauls herself over. She lands awkwardly on her side, grit and rubble digging in. And then she’s moving again, rolling up onto her knees, climbing to her feet, and running.

She heads for the rooftop entrance to the building, wrenching the rusted door open and breaking the lock in the process.

It takes a moment for her eyes to adjust to the sudden darkness.

A moment too long.

There’s a pop, and a muzzle flash, and a burst of pain in her chest. She stumbles down the steps and lands on the dirt linoleum floor.

She blinks through the pain, a whine building in the back of her throat, and sees, through the tangle of her hair, a pair of shining brown boots appear in her narrow field of vision. Then the person wearing them squats down, and Laura sees the barrel of a gun, and the smiling face behind it.

“Hello,” Kate Argent says, her smile wide with delight. “You must be Laura Hale.”

[rejectedbyeharmony]

Bryan Paul, Semi-Pro BMXer

The summer after I graduated high school, I got the opportunity to spend some time in Europe with a few of my classmates and my favorite art teacher. We spent weeks looking at art, taking in the culture (read: legally drinking), and saying a farewell to each other before we all went off to college. I wasn’t focused on meeting anyone that summer, I was happy enjoying my last few glory days before college started, and I had to make a whole new set of friends.

I was accepted to George Mason University, which is a great fine arts program. But, my parents lived 25 minutes away, so I commuted to school. My freshman year, I didn’t really get the college experience. I would hang out in friends dorms, but I didn’t really get a chance to make many friends, as I was taking a full load of classes and was dating someone who didn’t go to our school. That guy is irrelevant to this story.

I found myself slipping into old social habits, including hanging out at the mall a lot with friends. Part of that experience was walking laps around Vans Skate Park, at the end of the mall. My girlfriends and I would go in and look at shoes, and pretend to be interested in the skateboards. But we were mostly interested in the skaters. We would stand on the chain-link fence and watch them do tricks, sometimes they’d come over and talk to us. Any girl who grew up in Woodbridge in the late nineties, spent her share of hours watching and flirting with these incredibly talented, hot guys. It was pretty much the highlight of every week.

Wednesday was bike night, when the BMX riders would come in and hit the pipes and bowls on their bikes. I loved going and watching them, because the skill level was significantly higher than most of the skateboarders, and it was pretty much like watching your own X-games at your local mall.

One fateful Wednesday I caught the eye of a tall, black-haired, blue-eyed guy. I didn’t know who he was, but from the way the staff treated him, he must have been important. He was really talented and had a great smile. I kept hanging around where he was and eventually he talked to me. His name was Bryan. And he was hot as fuck. I don’t even remember what we talked about but ended up hanging out that night, having dinner and talking for hours. And then the next day, he called me. He wanted to know what I was doing that night, and if I wanted to go on an adventure. This is still probably the most romantic thing any man has ever asked me, to this day.

So we met up, and he took me to the neighborhood where he grew up. It wasn’t far from where I grew up, and I spent some time playing in this neighborhood as a kid too, so it bonded us. He showed me this tiny pet cemetery in the woods and we shared a mutual creepy shiver when we discovered it. We laughed and made out, and had an incredible time together.

Needless to say, I was completely smitten. I knew he was older than me, but I couldn’t really tell how old. I was only 18 and I had no concept of discerning men’s age yet. I was sure he knew I was younger, but he never asked how much younger. So we kept dating, blissfully ignorant of each other’s ages, but just happy to spend time together.

He lived pretty far south of me, closer to Richmond. He was always willing to come up and see me, but one day suggested that I come down his way. We met and he took me to Richmond. I had never been there before, but a lot of the kids I went to high school with ended up moving there and loved it. He showed me around all the cool neighborhoods and I fell in love with Carytown. I thought it was so cool that he would take me there, and I fell head over heels for this guy.

We dated through the end of my first semester in college, when he announced to me that he had to move to South Carolina. He was getting laid off from his job, and he was going to go work for his dad in Charleston. My heart took a huge leap and I told him I was going to go with him. He encouraged me to stay and finish school, but I needed to be with him. I told my parents that I was going to take a semester off and follow my heart, and they were understandably livid. I wasn’t working at the time, and I had no money. So I was completely financially reliant on them. They paid my car bill, my insurance, and gave me an allowance for gas and food to get to school. I told them that I didn’t want any of that and I just wanted Bryan.

My parents told me if I dropped out of school, they would take my car away. They also threatened that if I left school, they would no longer be responsible for paying on my student loans. I didn’t believe them, I knew they were all just empty threats… Or so I thought. But I also had a car and no money and I needed to get out of town before they could take it away from me.

So I stole the car, I drove out to Warrenton where my grandma lived and I asked her for money. I don’t remember how much she gave me, but I do remember her crying when she wrote me the check. She begged me not to go, but I told her it was something I needed to do. So I got in my Saturn and drove it to Charleston.

Bryan had given me an address, and I called to tell him I was coming. At the time I had a pretty basic Nokia brick phone. There was no text messaging, just calls, so I really had to rely on him answering. He didn’t answer my call until I was crossing the North Carolina/South Carolina border. I remember looking up at the exit for South of the Border, and when I looked down and saw that he was calling me back. I gleefully told him where I was, and it stung when he sounded stunned that I was actually coming. I asked “do you want me there?” And he said “of course. You’ll be here late, but just call me when you get here and I’ll come down and let you in.”

When I drove up to the house in Charleston, I was so nervous that i forgot to call him. Walking up, I could tell it was his parents house, so I expected to see them. I hoped that he told them that I was coming, and I wouldn’t be an unwelcome guest. But I didn’t expect to see two small pink bikes with streamers thrown down on the sidewalk in front of the house. There were children living here.

I sucked in my breath as I knocked on the door and Bryan’s mom answered. She gave me half a smile and welcomed me into her home. She apologized for not having the guestroom ready, and explained that Bryan forgot to tell them that I was coming. I was mortified, I immediately felt like I was making a terrible decision, but I just needed to spend the time with him to know that things could be right.

Then he came down and hugged me, and quickly ushered me up to his room. I stood there awkwardly and asked “should I not sleep in your room with you?” He said, “No it’s fine.” And we crawled into bed and I told him all about my trip down. At some point during our conversation I mentioned something about dropping out of college during my first semester. He stopped me and asked, “wait how old are you?”

Here we go. I remember looking back at him with big eyes, for the first time realizing that we had never had that conversation. I said “I’m 18,” then reassured him, “I’ll be 19 in May.” And his face turned green. He said angrily, “do you have any idea how old I am?” I didnt... so I guessed 25. I didn’t know anyone older than 25 that I didn’t consider a ‘real adult’. He laughed and closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, and then he all at once wide-eyed looked at me and said “Fuck, Katie. I’m 32.”

I didn’t know how to react to that and I think I didn’t say anything. But he was clearly fretting over it. He laid back on the pillow and closed his eyes, and sighed “Let’s just go to bed.” We didn’t have sex that night, and I couldn’t sleep anyway. I just laid there awkwardly cuddling with him, worried about the bikes and the parents and what the fuck was I doing.

I think I dozed off around four and woke up with the sun. He was already up and out of bed. I cursed him for leaving me in that room by myself, but was grateful to discover there was an adjoining bathroom with a shower. So I pulled some clean clothes out of my bag and went into the bathroom and ugly cried in the shower trying to decide what I was going to do. Would I just hide in the room until he came and got me? Should I walk downstairs and see if everyone’s waiting for me at the breakfast table? I was so confused and a ball of anxiety.

As I finished my shower and I got a towel, I heard two tiny voices in the bedroom. They’re were little girls in there. My heart sank as the reality sunk in: Bryan had children. I kept hoping that maybe they were his nieces or just some neighborhood kids, and I searched back through my memories to try to recall whether he had ever told me he had children. But all I could remember was never telling each other any intimate details about our lives. I mean, Jesus Christ, neither of us knew how old the other one was.

Yes I realize how stupid this is, I gave up my entire life to move to another state with someone who wasn’t even expecting me, who I knew nothing about. I see that now. And I felt it then, but I was too young and naïve to understand the gravity of the situation.

I got dressed and walked out into the bedroom to find Bryan in there with two beautiful little girls playing video games they both looked up confused that I was there. He clearly hadn’t even primed them for the woman that would be walking out of the bathroom. I use the phrase woman lightly, because I was not. I was all of 18, and I barely had any relationship experience, and here I was faced with a man, much older than me… With two little girls.

I’ve always been pretty good with kids, so I stood on that confidence, and sat down on the floor with them. They flooded me with questions “What’s your name? When did you get here? How do you know daddy? I like your hair. What’s that? (pointing to a tattoo) Oh, did that hurt? Do you want to go outside and play?”

I felt relieved by that last question and happily agreed to go outside and play with the girls. I looked to Bryan for some acknowledgment, he just smiled and said he would come outside a little later. We were outside for what felt like hours, until his mom called us in for lunch. Bryan never came outside to play with us and never gave me an opportunity to talk to him about what we were doing here. But when I walked inside, I saw my bag packed at the top of the stairs. He was leaving me a not-so-subtle clue that he wanted me to leave.

So I politely finished lunch with his family and walked upstairs to grab my bag. I made an excuse about having to visit some friends in town, thanked his parents for their hospitality, and said my goodbyes. He followed me out to my car and tried to apologize, but I was heartbroken and the damage had been done.

I loaded Incubus “Morning View” into my CD player, and watched him in the rear view as i pulled away and made the long trek back to Northern Virginia. I didn’t go home that night, I drove onto campus and stayed with a friend who knew where I was going that weekend. I called her on the way back and she could just hear me quietly weeping on the other end and she said “hey, just come to my dorm”. At this point I had already disenrolled from school, and it was too late for me to sign up for the next semester of classes. So I waited a few days hiding out in Jessie’s dorm until my sister called, asking if I was ok. She said everyone was worried about me, and I confessed that things didn’t work out. Then, I finally went home to my parents house. To my moms credit, she never gave me shit, she just welcomed me back in with open arms and to this day we’ve never really spoken about it.

It’s been 17 years now, but I still think about him all the time. I’ve even looked for him on social media, but he was never really much of a Facebook kinda guy. I never knew the whole story about his kids mother, or his past. But sometimes, I’ll see someone who vaguely looks like him, and my heart misses him as much as it did that day I left.

[raychulemma]

50 Completely Random Questions People Rarely Ask Tag:

1. What’s your favorite candle scent? Red Apple Wreath - Yankee Candle. It's perfectly Autumnal and always goes on half price sale after Christmas. I have far too many versions of it

2. What female celebrity do you wish you were related to? Probably Maya Rudolph because she's a shameless weirdo like me

3. What male celebrity do you wish was your brother? Probably Peter Kay. I feel like he would be easy to open up to. And he would make awkward family events so much more bearable

4. What’s your favorite thing about marriage? (And if you’re not married, what’s your favorite thing about being single?) Security. Safety. I didn't expect it to feel any different because we had been living together for a while but something about the actual marriage made me feel protected and comfortable. Also because its a same-sex marriage it's a lot nicer to say my wife than my fiancée, because i would wonder if they assume my fiancée is male

5. What’s one thing you own that you should probably get rid of, but just can’t? Books that I'm not going to re-read but have memories linked to buying/receiving/reading them.

6. Can you do a split? not a chance

7. How old were you when you learned how to ride a bike? Seven. i learnt at the end of my road because it's a dead end. and i got a green bike for my birthday with a seat for my teddy

8. How many oceans have you swam in? just the Atlantic ocean 🌊

9. How many countries have you been to? 6. France, Spain, Germany, USA (Florida), Wales, Scotland.

10. Is anyone in your family in the army? No, my Grandad was, and some of my Great Uncles but no one during my lifetime

11. What was your favorite TV show when you were a child? Superted, Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, The Story of Tracy Beaker, Dick n Dom in da Bungalow, Jungle Run

12. What did you dress up as on Halloween when you were eight? A classy binbag witch

13. Have you read any of the Harry Potter, Hunger Games or Twilight series? I got into the Harry Potter books in 1998 and am still in love with the series. I went to the midnight release for the last book. I watched all of the films in the opening week and vividly remember that the cinema i saw the first film at in 2001 had a Harry Potter themed sweet shop. I have jewellery, clothing, books, dvds, wands, other collectibles. I read the books with my mum when i was younger and watched all of the films in the cinema with her. she had her own HP merch. My wife also loves Harry Potter. We have been to see Cursed Child twice and have been to the Studio Tour 3 (or 4?) times. We had a Harry Potter themed wedding which was absolutely perfect. Hunger Games was something i avoided reading until the first film was coming out, and then absolutely loved the first 2 books (3rd one got too political for me) and the films are still some of my favourites for costume and set design. I read the twilight books after my best friend recommended them to me. We all actually read them as part of our sisterhood club. I went to blackpool to watch the first film in the cinema with my best friend. I watched the last one at midnight with my wife and one of the girls from the sisterhood who is one of the biggest twilight fans i know still. she has behind the scenes books and dvds and has re read the books that much that the spines are just gone. my mum was also a big twilight fan and would watch them any time they were on tv. i watched a few at the cinema with her, always her choice. she hadnt seen hunger games at the time of them being released but we did watch them all with her a few years ago

14. Would you rather have an American accent or a British accent? i film YouTube videos and always think my accent would be more interesting if it was American

15. Have you ever taken karate lessons? no, my 2 brothers and sister did when i was 5 or 6. i didnt like being touched so never did it

16. Do you know who Kermit the frog is? yup

17. What’s the first amusement park you’ve been to? im going to guess Gullivers world Warrington because its the closest one to where i live

18. What language, besides your native language, would you like to be fluent in? French because I love disneyland paris. or japanese because i would love to visit tokyo but its way out of my comfort zone

19. Do you spell the color as grey or gray? grey. e for england, a for america

20. Do you know triplets? yes, 2 girls and a boy but i only met the girls

21. Do you prefer Titanic or The Notebook? Titanic. my mum was a massive fan. She watched it 3 times in the cinema when it first came out. we watched it with her when it was released in imax on an anniversary. she had behind the scenes books, a few versions of the vhs and dvds, playing cards. her love for it made me love it

22. Have you ever had Indian food? no im a very fussy eater and have never tried indian or Chinese

23. What’s the name of your favorite restaurant? Of all time? Tough choice but im going with pizza hut. Cheesy bites base with double mushroom. Never craved something more

24. Have you ever been to Olive Garden? they dont have it in England so no but i would probably like it

25. What would your parents have named you if you were the opposite gender? i have no idea, maybe jason after my dad?

26. If you have a nickname, what is it? rach, chicken, chickadee

27. Who’s your favorite person in the world? i want to say scruff but shes technically not a person. kirsty is my best friend and i would pick her every time

28. Would you rather live in a rural area or in the suburbs? where i live is in between. drive one way and its city, the other way is farms. so living in one ot those farmhouses not far from city life would be the dream. i would have chickens, sheep and cats.

29. Can you whistle? yep but my cats hate the noise

30. Do you sleep with a nightlight? i can see the hallway light from where our bed is so i dont generally need a nightlight but we do have cute ones. i have 3 HP ones on my bedside table

31. Do you eat breakfast every morning? yea as long as i have time

32. How many times have you been to the hospital? ive only ever been to a&e. once for palpitations, a few times for mental health and once for an x ray on my hand. ive been to walk in centres for urine/kidney infections and for fractured fingers. oh i did go to hospital to see a neurologist to be diagnosed with essential tremor

33. Have you ever seen Finding Nemo? yes i love it. my brother and sister both bought me the dvd for christmas the year it came out so i had 2 copies for a while. i also had the game for pc and ps2. and i had a game on my phone and ipad where you could build up the seabed and gain fish. the film is just so nice and calming to watch. the scenery, the sound effects, the movements are all just gently flowing. and somehow you get attached to these characters and root for them whether youre a fan of tropical fish or not.

34. Where do you buy your jeans? primark, next, sainsburys, asda

35. What’s the last compliment you got? kirsty said my eyelashes look like im wearing mascara when im not

36. Do you usually remember your dreams in the morning? yea and they're weird as fuck. the latest one was about the bath being clogged with poo

37. Favorite beverage that isn’t water? Tea ☕

38. How many pairs of shoes do you currently own? a disgusting amount. maybe 20. maybe more

39. How old were you when you found out that Santa wasn’t real? about 8 which I think wasnt too young or too old. my brother told me which I was glad about because i was prone to being bullied at school and would have hated to be told by nasty kids

40. What is one food that you used to hate but now you love? cheesy garlic bread WTF

41. What is a weird lie you’ve told? i told kirsty once that i had pood the bed and asked her to help me clean it.

42. Heels or flats? flats always. specifically trainers. i think dresses look so much cuter with trainers. same with suits

43. Do you have any weird phobias? no just common ones. moths, spiders, flying insects, beetles, heights, being completely isolated, finding a dead person

44. What is a phrase or word you always say? i cant actually think of a current phrase i say but i do get stuck on phrases

45. What is a song that you bast or belt out when you are alone? part of your world, let it go, bridge over troubled water, over the rainbow. any that i try to actually hit the notes on

46. What is one of your biggest pet peeves? nails. nails tapping, and the sound of cutting or biting nails. or people that stop in the middle of an aisle or walkway when you're trying to get past

47. Do you sleep with your closet door open or closed? they dont even have doors on yet so open

48. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of bees? bear. the noise of bees terrifies me. i had a flying ant in my hair on flying ant day but i didnt know. i heard it buzz and cried

49. Do you have any weird things you do? i cant have 2 cream biscuits together (custard cream and jam n cream). i sometimes say hi to my teddies so they know i havent forgot about them. i buy hatchimals when theyre on sale even though i havent previously collected them cos im an impulsive pos. (honestly collecting animal jam figures and my little ponies were the best though)

50. What movie could you watch over and over again and still love? any of the harry potter films, titanic, sisterhood of the travelling pants, Princess diaries 1 and 2, enchanted, princess and the frog, raise your voice, catch me if you can, chalet girl, the shining, slumdog millionaire

[sapphicalexaandra]

Where Thou Diest...

Pairing: Jace/Alec

Rating: Mature

Summary: When Jace dies, Alec feels it...

Notes: One-shot, 11k. This is based on the events of City of Glass that COULD be translated partly into 2x20, mixed with show events so far, set in my Seelie Court Kiss AU. So POSSIBLE finale spoilers. Check tags for further information.

“You can stop all this, you can choose to be better right here, right now…please, Dad.”

The crack in his voice at the last word angered Jace, yet he could not deny to himself that a part of him still was, and would always be, a scared and lonely little boy who had cried for his father’s death. And who longed for his father’s love. How desperate was he, that, after all this time, after all Valentine had done, he still wished he could change him?

Jace and Valentine were staring at each other, unmoving. Everything else was quiet, the only sounds to be heard the soft crashing of waves on the lake shore. Clary’s heavy breathing, coming from the place where she was trapped in a pentagram of Valentine’s doing, was easy to tune out.

“Oh, Jonathan…you were always the better part of me.”

And he passed the Soul Sword through Jace’s heart.

Jace didn’t feel the pain. Or, the emotional heartache must’ve hurt more than the literal one, because what he felt more acutely and clearly than anything, were the tears slowly falling from his eyes as Valentine caught his fall and held him tenderly, as he died by his own hand. Jace had had one last hope for the man who had raised him not to feel love, and that was his final punishment.

The sky above was clear, cloudless, and beautiful. The screams that were coming from Clary, the unyielding convulsions that were shaking his body, the blood that was dripping from his mouth and spreading under him like a sheet, were like a distant nightmare, happening to someone else, not him.

In those last moments, he just felt sad.

He couldn’t keep his promise.

The sounds of battle were all around him. Demon after demon swarmed Brocelind Plain, and Shadowhunters and Downworlders alike pushed them back with all they had, the Alliance rune - Clary's new invention - enabling them to draw from each other’s strengths.

Suddenly, one sound prevailed over the rest.

The rattle of bow and arrow falling on the ground thundered in Alec’s ears, because he hadn’t noticed that he had let his weapon go.

Alec gasped. A lightning bolt had just struck him right through the chest. Or, that was what it felt like.

His hand, as if it didn’t belong to him, as if he had just been thrown out of his own body and was experiencing it from the outside, rose and placed itself over his heart –  his still beating heart. Yet, every pulsation brought pain, an inexplicable, blinding agony…and he couldn’t breathe.

His mouth agape, he fell to his knees, doubling in on himself. Another ache was coming from his abdomen - a black hole was being dug from inside of him. And the source of the pain dawned on him…

Bringing a hand to where his parabatai rune was, blood came out of it…and he screamed.

“Jace! Jace, please, answer me!”

“It’s too late, I’m afraid, Clarissa.”

“How could you do this?! How could you kill who has been like your son?!”

 “Do you still not understand? I’m doing this for all of us! We’ll finally be free of all these wretched demons!”

“You are the real demon!”

But Valentine wasn’t interested anymore. Rising from Jace’s side, he used Jace’s blood to activate the pentagram.

“Alec?! Alec, what’s wrong?! Are you hurt?!”

Alec could only vaguely hear the shouts of his sister, as she rushed towards him. He also barely took notice of the shadowy forms of the demons slowly closing in on him, as he stayed there, clawing at his face, screaming his lungs out. If he could’ve ripped his lungs from inside of him, or, better, his heart, he would’ve.

The throbbing in his side had stopped, abruptly, inevitably, like a switch had been turned off.  

“Alexander!”

Lights started flashing somewhere ahead of him, the stench of burned flesh reaching him every time. Hands were now on him, holding his head upwards to face a long-haired figure he supposed was Izzy. Her mouth was wordlessly moving.  

He couldn’t hear anything, he couldn’t feel anything. His entire being seemed to start and finish in that bleeding, gaping-open spot. The severed end of a bond that wasn’t there anymore.

“Promise me! Promise me you’ll be careful!”

“I – I promise, Alec.”

He never should’ve let Jace go after Valentine alone.

“He’s dead. Jace’s dead.”

He didn’t recognize his own voice. He didn’t see what Izzy’s reaction was. He could tell that they were now under a magical shield, as Magnus was trying to protect them from the demon attacks…

None of that mattered.

Feeling his last ounce of strength leave him, Alec collapsed on the ground. His life, his existence, was void of anything that mattered. And he started screaming again.

He should’ve been by Jace’s side.

“What did you do, Clarissa?!”

The Angel Raziel, in all his glory, in all his grandeur, had been summoned. Except, he wasn’t answering to Valentine.

Clary – despite everything – smiled. She removed her hand from where she had changed the name on the pentagram. Raziel answered to her.

The Angel wasted no time in killing Valentine.

“I can grant you a wish, Clarissa Morgenstern.”

“Alec, you need to react! We need to get out of here, please!”

Izzy’s sobs were echoing in his ears, as she was hovering over him, unsure of where to touch him, tears streaming down her face.

“I can’t hold on much longer!” came Magnus’s strained voice.

Alec was looking up at the sky, the beautiful, endless immensity above. His senses seemed to come back to him all at once, because he could now see it all.

Every star, every tree…

The shield around them that was thinning…

The moving forms outside of it that were slaying the demons coming their way – probably Simon, who was bonded to Izzy, and someone else of their friends, the squad he was supposed to lead…

The battle that was still raging on further from them – who knows what they were all thinking of his predicament, and what it had meant for their formation...

Everything was clear, and Alec knew what he had to do.

His hand closed on the knife he had strapped on his thigh.

Where thou diest…

“Izzy, stop him!”

…will I die.

“Alec, NO!”

Izzy grabbed him when the tip of the knife was only a few inches away from his heart.

He had no time for this. Couldn’t she see how he was bleeding, cut in half, irremediably, forever, broken? He had sworn his oath! He wouldn’t live a half-life!

“Izzy, let me go! Let me go!”

They started brawling, an ironic echo of the games they played as kids. Could they ever have imagined one of them having to stop the other from killing himself?

Their broken, strangled shouts must’ve been pitiful to hear.

“Jace wouldn’t want this! He’d want you to live!”

“Jace isn’t here! He’ll never be again! I can’t – you have to let me go!”

“I can’t lose you, too!”

She could ask for any wish…she could ask for anything…

For a moment, the smiling, beloved face of her mother came to mind. She dreamed of running to hug her, burying her face in her hair, tears of joy streaming down their faces…

But that could never be.

The sight of Jace laying a few feet away from her – he had never seemed more like a small, tragic boy. He had just been killed by who he had thought all his life to be his father. What person would she be, if she just let that happen, when she could fix it?

I’m sorry, mom. I love you. Forgive me.

Clary knew what to wish for.

"Please, Alexander, don’t do this!”

“Alec…don’t…”

He couldn’t make himself hear their desperate voices, or he wouldn’t be able to do it. He needed to do it. He wasn’t himself anymore, and he would never be, ever again. He had just hit his sister, sending her flying against the magical shield, where she was now doubling over in pain…no, that person couldn’t be allowed to exist.

He found his knife on the ground, and he gripped it as hard as he could, trying to rein in the shaking in his hands. Tears were falling freely from his eyes, but he wasn’t bothered by them. Soon, he wouldn’t feel them anymore.

Magnus dropped the shield. Alec had no more than a second before he would be immobilized. He had to hurry up.

I’m sorry, was his last thought.

“Could you, please, bring Jace back to life?”

Jace opened his eyes.

For a long moment, he couldn’t tell where he was, what he had been doing, or why he was lying on the ground. He could hear the soft crashing of waves, he could feel the cold of the terrain biting at his skin, and he could smell blood – lots of blood, but none of that made sense to him.

All he knew was that he was breathing, his chest rising and falling…and that felt, inexplicably, like a blissful, blessed act.

Only when a shadow clouded his sight, caused by the form of a crying and laughing Clary leaning above him, did Jace remember.

A battle – J.C. versus J.C. – and Jace, with Izzy's help, had managed to avenge once and for all Max’s death, Jonathan Christopher Morgenstern finally falling to his death from a bridge...

They hadn’t had time to rejoice at their victory, however, because they all had to rush to Idris after learning that Valentine had managed to reach it, despite all their attempts at preventing him from doing so. The Seelie Queen, as it turned out, had made that possible, which at least ensured them the Downworlders’ support, when, suddenly, demons had started to infiltrate Idris after the mysterious deactivation of the Demonic Towers. Valentine must’ve had more assets than they had thought.

A counterattack had been about to happen, when Valentine had suddenly appeared in the middle of the street Clary and Jace were walking in, and he had grabbed Clary, pushing her into a portal. Jace had had to run after them at that point, in the hopes of stopping Valentine’s plans. He had reached them at Lake Lyn, the Mirror, the third Mortal Instrument, the last piece of the puzzle Valentine needed to be able to summon the angel Raziel and have him end all demonic life on Earth, Downworlders included. Apparently, he had needed Clary’s pure angel blood as well. Jace had tried to bargain with him, to make him see the errors of his ways, he had begged him to be a better person…and Valentine in turn had passed him through with the Soul Sword.

He remembered agonizing in Valentine’s arms – Valentine himself doing his last ironic act of good parenting – as he felt the life fade from within himself. He remembered crying about his idiocy, for how he had let that man ruin him one last time.

He remembered the worry and desperation in Alec’s eyes as he had tried to stop him from going after Valentine, and how he had promised him to be careful, to come back to him…Angel – Alec!

The knife was on the floor, his hands immobilized, well before it was magically induced.

Alec widened his eyes…and he could breathe again. He could’ve sworn he felt the blood happily rushing back in his veins, the color returning to his cheeks, as his vision cleared, and his mind was truly his again…because the parabatai bond was back in its place, throbbing and flowing with life, as if nothing had happened.

That couldn’t be possible. That was impossible…

Yet, it was happening.

“He’s – he’s alive…” he said, more to himself that to the others, hardly believing his own words.

“What?” The surprise was clear in Izzy’s voice, as she slowly got herself back upright. Her eyes were wide and glistening with tears. 

Magnus crouched in front of Alec, his hands still outstretched to hold him in his spell, and Alec turned his head towards him.

“Jace’s…alive!”

And he started laughing. Hysterically, crazily, he was laughing, as that unbelievable yet incontrovertible truth set on him more and more. The pulsing in his parabatai rune was even getting stronger, and that was the most lively and blessed sensation that he could imagine, after having thought everything had ended. Jace was alive! He could feel his life force, his familiar and astonishing presence at the other end of their bond – the very same one that had just been severed…

“How is that possible?” Magnus echoed his thoughts, but he must’ve taken Alec’s reaction as the real deal, because he let him go.

Alec was breathing hard, in and out, unable to stop a smile from splitting his face in half. He shook his head at Magnus, and looked at his sister, whose own growing smile…made the harsh reality and the feeling of shame come crushing down on Alec. His face fell, and his throat closed painfully.

“Izzy…Iz, I’m so–”

But she shook her head firmly, and she was about to throw herself into his arms, when a shout reached them.

“Watch out!” Simon called out to them.

Magnus was up in the blink of an eye, sending to the depths of hell the demon coming their way.

Alec looked around, and he finally, really took in his surroundings. It was chaos.

The entire hill was a whirlwind of movement, and the ground littered with bodies and ashes emanated the most unpleasant stench of death. The screams and clashes of the people fighting for their lives were positively deafening. The bubble they had been encased in was slightly apart from the thick of the fight, which had probably tried to stay clear of them…

Alec dreaded to know if he had had any hand in causing it all to go downhill.

And yet…that battle, its importance, its cruciality, still felt so far away from him. He couldn’t focus on it, he couldn’t bring himself to care enough. The pulsing life-force at the other end of himself needed him, now more than ever.

He had to find him.

And as the sight in front of him became no more than an aggravating obstacle between him and Jace, an unprecedented kind of anger mounted deep in Alec. He’d had enough – of pain, of loss…he wasn’t letting any of that touch Jace ever again, if he had a say in it.

When another demon growled and launched itself on them, Alec, bow and arrow back in his arms, rose, and shoot it with all he had.

He hit the target...but that wasn’t the most surprising part.

A blast, bright and golden, rippled out of the disintegration of the demon, and the entire plain was inundated by it. The light was burning his eyes, so Alec shielded himself with his arms, as shouts were heard all around. But the explosion didn’t harm anyone…except for the demons in its trajectory.

Alec’s mouth fell open. Had he just done that?

But, of course, Alec was bonded to Magnus through the Allegiance rune…he had magic abilities now. They hadn’t been quite this strong so far, admittedly, but that was the only explanation he could find. It was working, that was what mattered. His path was clearing in front of him faster than he had expected, and he needed to get out of there as soon as possible.

“Come on, let’s go!” he shouted to his squad.

Not waiting to see if they were following him, Alec started running. Arrow after arrow hit their targets, and every time a new blast stronger than the one before caused the surrounding demons to dissolve into dust.

He would get to Jace.

“What – what happened? How am I…alive?” Jace managed to croak out, his mouth full of Clary’s hair as she hugged him painfully tight, sobs shaking her petite form.

Awkwardly, he patted her back. Not that he wasn’t touched by her clear distress for his death (and resurrection), but her emotions added to his own were overwhelming. He didn’t know how to deal with emotions well – that was another thing he had to thank Valentine for – and he was trying hard to not let the tears fall, not now at least. He needed to be strong for her…and they needed to get out of there.

Clary disentangled herself from him, and recounted what had happened after his death as best as she could. It was only then that Jace noticed Valentine’s body a few feet away from them. For a moment, he was shocked, and his stomach tightened. He would need time to process that – but, ultimately, it was for the best. It had to be.  

“So, you wished for me…to be back?” He felt inexplicably touched, and it showed in his voice. Clary could’ve wished for everything, anything, and she chose to bring him back. Looking at her reddened face, he thought of her mother, Jocelyn. “You – you didn’t have to. Your mom–”

“Don’t even say that, Jace. It was the right thing to do, you didn’t deserve to die like that. My mother didn’t either…but she wouldn’t have wanted to live at your expense. I’m sure of it. One day, I will see her again…but as long as I’m here I need to be the best person I can be, in her memory.”

A few tears escaped from Jace’s firm control, and he initiated a new hug, trying to convey with it all that he couldn’t say. He and Clary had been through so much together, some of it good, most of it bad, and in the end, he would always care about her.

“Thank you,” Jace whispered, and he had never meant it more. He had to clear his voice to continue. “We should bring Valentine’s body back to the Clave.”

They rose, and Jace found himself having a lot of difficulty doing that. His head was spinning, and he wobbled on the spot. He felt raw, every nerve ending on edge, his hands tingling, his knees weak and unfeeling. Was that what it felt like to come back to life?

But he couldn’t let himself surrender to those sensations, and to the tiredness in his bones.

He went to pick Valentine’s body up.

“Wait, Jace, you can barely stand up! I’ll carry him!” protested Clary, putting a hand on his arm to stop him.

Jace looked at her straight in the eye. “I need to do it.”

She must’ve seen something in him, because, in the end, she let go.

The trek back to Alicante seemed to last a lifetime. Every movement, every step hurt. His insides felt frizzly, the body on his shoulder as if it weighted ten tons. Still, he went on, deaf to Clary’s concern, determined to carry his burden on his own. It had always been his to bear.

Strangely enough, they didn’t encounter any demon as they passed the forest, and Jace chose to see it as a sign that the battle was going well for their forces…

A knot tightened around his heart when he thought about their forces.

He had died, and Alec must’ve felt that. Since he had woken up, Jace had felt frantic, on edge…and it had taken a while to realize those emotions weren’t exactly his. He could feel Alec’s desperation to reach him burning in him, and at least that meant Alec was alive, and that their bond hadn’t been broken by his death, no matter what the oath said. Still, Jace tried as best as he could to send Alec’s way the feeling that he was fine, in the hopes of mending the distress he had caused his parabatai.

But that didn’t feel as enough. He needed to see Alec, and that need was so primal, so strong, so pressing, that it was slowly consuming him from the inside-out…Jace needed to touch his parabatai, to hold him and be held by him, because he had just died, and this new life coursing through his veins still hadn’t experienced the closeness of the other half of him.

Cause the truth was, while he was still ultimately himself, Jace felt like a new person had been brought back, someone who was now reacquainting himself with life. He was, for all intent and purposes, a new born. But he was still incomplete, and he would be until he wasn’t reunited with Alec.  

Jace pressed harder, quickening his pace.

In the end, they reached the City Hall of Alicante, and Jace laid the body on the ground in front of the Inquisitor Herondale, his grandmother. She looked stunned, staring at the body in awe, and she looked proud, Jace could tell. But he wasn’t really in the mood to be happy about that. He stared straight ahead.

At the Council’s request, he heard Clary recount what had happened, everything that happened, and Jace kept silent through all of it, even when they all started examining him and his blood-stained shirt.

When Clary stopped, he asked about the demon attack.

“It’s still on-going. The demons clearly haven’t progressed beyond Brocelind Plain, but we still have no other news,” clarified the Inquisitor. “We’re sending a scout.”

They had to wait some more, then.

“Can I be excused for the night?” Jace barely had the energy to ask.

Tomorrow, hopefully, he would have the usual fire he put in everything he did, but in that moment, he just wished the Council would let him go without him having to beg for it. They could examine his miraculousness another day.

His grandmother took a long look at him, and she nodded. “Go rest, both of you.”

Jace and Clary started to make their way towards the Lightwood mansion in silence, no need to voice the worry they both would carry until all their loved ones came back to them.

At some point, however, Jace broke out into a smile...

Alec was in the city, getting closer and closer – Jace could feel it. Every part of him sang for his parabatai’s return.

His comrades, spurred with new energy by his unexpected display of power, were following Alec’s charge. The demons were still never-ending, flooding the plain again and again every time their numbers started to dwindle, but their counterattack became more organized, more focused, more efficient. Until finally, finally, the jointed effort of the Shadowhunters and Downworlders brought an end to the endless advance of the enemy.

A roar of joy erupted throughout the plain, but Alec could barely hear it.

Moving away from the others, he took from under his shirt the chain he had wrapped around his neck – at the end of it, the Herondale ring.

Alec, Izzy, Magnus and Simon were in the Lightwood mansion in Alicante, getting battle ready before they were supposed to go to the City Hall and join the rest of the army – which included a big portion of the city guard, as well as Luke’s pack, the New York vampire clan, and the handful of Warlocks they had managed to recruit. Alec, however, noticed someone was missing.

He went upstairs to the living quarters, and there he was, Jace, giving him his back as he packed his weapons. Something was wrong, judging by the sense of unease he could feel coming from him through their bond.

“Where’s Clary? We’re about to go.”  

Jace stiffened. He didn’t turn around.

“Jace?”

Alec took a few steps forward, worry only growing in him. He went to put a hand on Jace’s shoulder, and his parabatai finally turned to face him. He had a strange, set look on his face, and he was avoiding Alec’s eyes.

“Jace. Where is Clary?”

“He took her.”

A pause, then, “What? What are you talking about?”

“Valentine. He appeared in the street and took her through a portal before I could reach them. They must’ve gone to Lake Lyn – the plan is starting…”

Alec’s head was spinning, trying to wrap itself around what he had just heard. “So, wait, what does he need Clary for? And you mean that at any point all the Downworlders could start dying?! Why didn’t you say anything?! We need to warn the Inquisitor and the others, we need to dispatch…”

“No.”

Jace looked him straight in the eye, and the resolution Alec saw there was unwavering. Alec opened and closed his mouth a few times.

“Jace…what are you saying?”

“There’s a swarm of demons advancing on the capital, we can’t spare anyone! But I need to get to Valentine, I can stop him once and for all – and this time, I won’t fail. Alec, there’s nothing you can say that will make me change my mind.”

Alec wanted to protest, he wanted to shake Jace so hard until he started making sense again…but he knew that it would be to no avail. Jace’s expression had an apologetic undercurrent, but the fire in his eyes wouldn’t budge, not even for him. Alec knew his parabatai inside and out, and there was no stopping him if he put his mind to something. Just recently, Jace had refused to back down from a direct fight with Jonathan Morgenstern...

But he be damned if he let Jace go on his own again. The ghost of the injuries his little brother’s killer had caused his parabatai still haunted Alec. He had come so close to lose him as well…and he didn’t think he’d survive someone else dying because of him.

“I’ll go with you.”

Jace shook his head furiously. “No, Alec, I need to do this alone.”

“No, you don’t. You never have to do anything alone! I’m your parabatai, whither thou goest–”

“Alec, please! The people will be counting on you, you’re a squad leader! They’ll be needing you…”

Those words stung more than Alec would’ve expected. His stomach dropped.

“Of course, since you don’t need me.”

Silence fell on them as if someone had abruptly turned off the sound. Jace was staring at him, stunned, and Alec, embarrassingly, felt his eyes starting to burn. Because he knew that was the truth, that was how it had always been. He had always needed Jace far more than Jace needed him. Lately, he had thought, maybe, that he had been wrong…

Jace seemed to come out of his trance. He stepped closer to Alec, gripping his arms, invading his personal space, and Alec lost his breath – damn Jace and the effect he always had on him! – as Jace kept Alec’s gaze trapped in his as if to burn himself into Alec’s soul...as if he wasn’t already.

“I need you, Alec, to be far, far away from Valentine. You know what he does, how he uses me and the people around me…Alec, I can’t – I can’t do what needs to be done if you’re there. Please, I’m begging you, my parabatai, stay out of it. You’re the one person I need most in this world, how can you not know that?” And the shaking in his voice couldn’t be but genuine.

Alec felt ashamed of his doubts then. Jace had made it very clear of how much he needed him, of how most of all he needed him alive. And there it was…the one thing that would’ve made him cave. Alec knew that Jace feared what Valentine would do to him, if he ever found out about them. He would weaponize their love for each other in the worst ways possible…

A part of Alec still wanted to fight, to try and find a loophole that would either make Jace stay or him go…but he knew he had to do this for him. Alec closed his eyes, defeated, and he nodded.

He felt Jace’s hands come up – oh, so tenderly – to hold his face, and Alec leaned forward to let their foreheads touch together.

Inhaling the same air as his parabatai’s, reminiscing the time not so long ago when they’d been on a roof, with a different yet similar sense of doom coming down on them, Alec basked in the feeling of belonging being this close to Jace always gave him.

Suddenly, however, he broke apart, going to grip Jace’s arms hard, fighting the still-strong urge to shake him. “Promise me! Promise me you’ll be careful!”

Jace gulped, now more subdued than before. “I – I promise, Alec.”

Jace then brought his hands to his own neck and, strangely enough, removed the necklace with his family ring from around it. He went to put it around Alec’s neck.

“Wait, Jace, what–”

“Keep it for me. You’ll give it back when I return.” 

Jace smiled, and Alec felt warmth pool around his heart. Jace was giving him what was left of his family, his heritage – in a sense, it was as if he was giving him himself, and Alec didn’t know why he felt so touched, because Jace had already done that a long time ago, reciting an oath in a circle of fire. Back then, however, Jace hadn’t known about this part of himself…it was only now that he could give it to Alec. Only now, there were officially no more parts of each other’s lives that weren’t intertwined, and Alec held his head down to receive the Herondale ring with a certain kind of reverence.  

“Alec, are you ready? We’re about to go!” Izzy’s call reached them from downstairs, and the moment passed. It was time.

“Don’t tell the others what is happening. If the Downworlders find out that Valentine’s so close to fulfilling his plan, it will distract them from the battle,” Jace told him. Alec raised an eyebrow, opening his mouth… “I know you don’t want to lie to them again! But this is just – I won’t let anything happen to them, I promise this as well…you just need to have faith in me.”

Alec stared in the depths of Jace’s differently-colored eyes…and he knew that he would follow him to the ends of the Earth. If I have faith in something, it’s you. It’s always been you. Those had been his words, and he would stand by them forever, even if that made him a fool. 

Alec nodded.

They were still not letting each other go. Alec registered a new resolution on Jace’s face a fraction before he was being pulled in for a kiss. He couldn’t help the moan that escaped him, as he responded, melting against Jace, opening his mouth and savoring his familiar taste that still made him so incredibly dizzy.

Alec still marveled at how he had survived so long without this. Their bodies fit perfectly, so rightly together, and in the few weeks since they’d become lovers they had found that out more and more. During the day, when they have to keep their distance, life had become like a slow, constant torture, that only accomplished to intensify his burning need and desire to be close to Jace, to be with Jace.

It felt like he was a perpetually starving man, and Jace was his cure, unescapably. If the guilt, the fear, the shame for what they were doing came to coil around his heart in his lowest moments, it was in moments like this that he realized all over again why it would always be worth it.

When they broke apart, Alec couldn’t escape the pleading in his voice, “Come back to me.”

“I will.”

 Alec stared at the ring in his hands, painfully recollecting the circumstances he had got it, mentally berating himself for how he had ceded so easily and let Jace go. Why could he never make the right decision? He had almost lost Jace, he had lost him for a while there, and if that had been permanent it would’ve been nobody’s but his fault. He had failed him, just as he had failed Max. And the darkness, the emptiness of a world without Jace…wasn’t sustainable. He didn’t want to live through it again. He wouldn’t.

Filling his mind with thoughts of Jace, Alec let the ring guide him to his parabatai.

As it turned out, Jace was back in Alicante, and now that he had a clear destination, Alec started running as fast as he could. He heard his friends trying to catch up to him, but he didn’t mind them, and pressed on.

Every less space that he put between them, it felt like the air filling his lungs became fresher and sweeter to inhale. Every cell in his body was yearning to be reunited with the other half of him, and that only spurred him to go faster. Not even entering the city slowed him down, because he could sense that Jace was nearby, and he would find him at any cost.

He was so close, closer…and closer...

Rounding a corner not far away from the Lightwood mansion, his heart skipped a beat, and he welcomed the tears starting to pool at the corner of his eyes. Because the sight of Jace, a safe, alive Jace, walking on the street beside Clary, could’ve made him go blind on the spot for how much it filled his burning eyes with its light. 

Jace saw him too, and he stopped in his tracks, a smile on his face, the emotion on it mirroring Alec’s own.

Did an eternity pass, or just an instant, before they collided with each other, their bodies clinging to each other, nullifying any separation that existed between them? He couldn’t have said. All that Alec did know was that he had Jace in his arms; he could inhale his unmistakable scent, he could hear his labored breaths, he could touch him and feel the life coursing through him, a fact that he couldn’t have trusted himself to be sure about before that exact moment. Jace was alive. He might’ve been crushing him with the strength of his embrace, but Jace was doing the same to him. They might’ve been crying, or laughing, or both, but nothing mattered besides their overwhelming need to dissolve the space between them that made them two separate beings…when they weren’t.  

Jace was talking, Alec sensed the mumbled words said against his neck more than he heard them. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”

Alec broke them apart only enough to be able to hold Jace’s face in between his shaking hands. “You were dead. I felt you die, you were dead…”

Jace was blinking furiously, as he croaked out, “Val – Valentine…he killed me, with the Soul Sword.”

Anger started to burn in Alec, those words making him positively sick, and he started studying every inch of Jace, from his pale face, to the blood-soaked shirt that clung to his body. His fault.

“The angel Raziel then brought me back to life, by Clary’s request,” Jace continued.

In the end, what did it matter how the miracle in front of him had happened? Still, that statement got through to Alec, and he followed his parabatai’s gaze to where Clary was side-hugging Simon, smiling at them through her tears, “It’s – it’s a long story.”

It was then that Alec also noticed that Izzy and Magnus were there with them as well. Izzy came forward and put a hand on Jace’s arm, and she was crying too. Jace tried to smile at her…but all of a sudden he was stumbling forward, as he turned even paler than before. Thankfully, Alec hadn’t let him go, and he managed to hold him upright. His entire weight was on Alec. It was like all the adrenaline had faded, and all the exhaustion of his death and resurrection had just come crushing down on Jace.

Yes, the explanations could wait. He needed to bring Jace home.

“I’ve got you,” he whispered against Jace’s hair.

Izzy stopped in front of Alec’s room, hesitating to enter. She was just going to go to bed – even though she doubted she would get some sleep – but the furious beating of her heart wouldn’t subside if she didn’t go check on them.

Clary’s words, explaining what had happened, as her, Izzy, Simon, Magnus, and Luke – who had joined them – all set in the living room, still resounded in Izzy’s mind. Jace had really died, and if it hadn’t been for Clary and the Angel Raziel…Izzy shuddered only at the thought. And without fail, the blank, void face of her big brother as he tried to put a knife through his heart came back to her, making the picture even bleaker. She didn’t think those images would ever stop haunting her. She had just almost lost two more people in her life...

Still, they had to go on, and she knocked, pushing the door open a moment later at Alec’s reply. He was getting out of the bathroom, fresh clothes on him, his hair damp and messy. His expression turned pained as he saw her. He came towards her anyway.

“How is he?” Izzy asked.

“He – he’s shaken, but he’ll be fine. He’s in the tub, cooling off a bit.”

Izzy noticed the pile of bloody clothes that he had in his arms, which he threw in the laundry basket, and she gulped, nodding.

Alec took a deep breath. “Iz, I’m –”

“Don’t, Alec,” she interrupted him. She managed a smile, for how hard it was. “You don’t have to apologize. It wasn’t your fault.”

“Still, I shouldn’t have hit you. I can't - I can't believe I did…I just, I couldn’t think, I couldn’t care about anything, it was just all dark and–”

She stepped forward, and took his hands in between her own. “I know – I think I’ve always known, that if I ever had to lose one of you, I’d lose both…and I can’t deny that it hurts. It hurts so much. After M-Max, seeing you like that–”

She found herself buried in her brother’s embrace, as she tried to restrain herself from outright crying. She might’ve failed a bit. Lately, it seemed like that was all she could do. 

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…I love you, little sister…” Alec was saying against her head. He was choked up too, and she hugged him tighter.

In the end, it was Izzy who broke apart first, wiping her face with the back of her hand. “Just tell Jace that I love him. And I’m here for whatever he needs.”

Alec nodded. “Iz…we’ll be alright. We need to believe it.”

Her addiction, their parents’ separation, Max dying, Jace and Alec almost dying…the only way to go next had to be up.

Yeah, they needed to believe that.

Jace was staring at the ripples caused by his fingers on the water’s surface as if in a daze. The soft sensation of the water all around him was a balm, and he was glad he had chosen to step into the tub after he had already taken a shower. All his joints were finally loosening up, and the water helped him get used to his own body again, to its shape, to its responses to the world around it. Eventually, it would all start to feel normal again – not a novelty, or something to marvel at. Eventually.

The sound of Alec’s footsteps got him out of his trance, and Jace turned towards his parabatai, who was making his way back into the bathroom.

One thing was right in his life again, at least.

When Alec had come running towards him in the middle of the street, and he had crushed him into a bone-shattering hug, Jace had felt something finally set in its place inside of him. Melting into the hug, he had held Alec as hard as he could, frustrated at how it still felt not enough, yet he had sighed in relief. Buried in his parabatai’s arms, the need to search for his missing part was gone, and Jace could let go. He had felt all strength leave his body, and he had collapsed in on himself.

He didn’t remember much of their trip back home, with Alec basically carrying him all the way – the contact of Alec’s body had been the only thing he was constantly aware of.

His first conscious thought came when he was thrown under the shower, Alec following him suit. The water had awakened his senses, and he had been able to see the look of utter horror on Alec’s face as he stared at his bloody chest. He had brought Alec’s hands over his heart, so they could both feel and relinquish in its steady beating. I’m here, I’m alive, he had tried to convey. Alec had then hugged him again, even fiercer than before, and no more external layers were in the way of them being as close as possible as they could physically get (for now). He remembered thinking in that moment that he would’ve very much liked for them to be truly, completely, fused together…only then could nobody ever separate them again.

Jace didn’t exactly know where that exaggerated need had come from, but even now, having Alec a few feet away from him, as he approached the tub, was positively maddening. For a few minutes, their bond had been severed, he had been not of this world anymore, and a deep-rooted fear for that to happen again had taken ahold of him… He had to literally force himself not to sound as needy as he felt and ask Alec to come in there with him, and make him feel all the ways in which he was alive and connected to him in every way.

But looking at Alec’s tired and swollen face as he knelt beside him, Jace knew that it wasn’t the right time.

Alec must’ve felt something similar, however, because the first thing he did was take Jace’s hand in between both of his, interlacing their fingers together before laying his head on top of them. He then stared at Jace’s face as if he still had trouble believing he was real.

“Izzy tells me to tell you that she loves you and that she’s here for you whatever you need,” Alec said, barely above a whisper.

Jace sighed, nodding. He knew there were a lot of people, Izzy most of all, that he needed to talk to the next day, and he wished he were in a better state to reassure her now. They had already lost Max…it pained him to think how she must’ve been feeling right now. And all because he had been so weak and stupid to...

Jace had to look up, fighting to keep treacherous tears at bay.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Alec told him, his voice soothing. Of course, he had noticed immediately. “You don’t have to be strong or some bullshit that you’re telling yourself right now. It’s okay if you’re not. I think it’s especially the case now.”

Alec smiled at him, and he brought a hand to caress his face, softly, lovingly. If he did it like that, how was Jace supposed to keep it together? It was already too late.

“I’m tired, Alec,” he admitted, brokenly, breathlessly. “I’m tired of things never going my way. I’m tired of my life being shaped by Valentine and the fucked-up things he does to me. I can’t believe I let him kill me.”

“No, Jace…don’t even say that. You didn’t let him do anything, none of this is your fault! Yes, Valentine has hurt you in many, many ways – but he’s gone now. He can’t hurt you anymore, you can start your life anew, free of him!”

They had already had a similar conversation, and he had already been resolute not to let his life be ruined by Valentine again…yet here he was, anyway. He didn’t want to say this to Alec and bring him down, not after what he had put him through, but if he couldn’t tell him…

“How many more times do I have to start anew?” He wanted, he could’ve begged Alec to give him an answer, but he knew there wasn’t one. 

Alec lowered his eyes, gripping Jace’s hand harder. “I don't know, Jace. I guess, how many times that it takes, until it gets better. And I’ll be here with you all the way, parabatai.” He then looked him straight in the eye, and in his eyes, there was a fire, a promise, that Jace knew he wouldn’t break.

It seemed that the only way forward was…forward. Jace took a deep breath - then he exhaled until he had no more air in his lungs. He did that a few times, feeling it with his entire body.    

Alec watched him in silence, bringing Jace's hand to his lips in the most tender of kisses, his presence and affection all that Jace really needed. And he used that moment of quiet to really regard his parabatai for the first time since they’d been back. Despite being clean and refreshed, Alec still looked like a mess, the circles under his eyes his most prominent feature. His grip on Jace’s hand never faltered.

Why did they seem unable to ever take a break from heart-shattering, world-altering events?

“How – how was it?” Jace asked, tentatively. At Alec’s raise of eyebrows, he went on, “Feeling me die. Is it as painful as they say?”

Alec inhaled sharply. He opened his mouth, averting his eyes, but no words came out. His lower lip was wobbly.

Jace took that as a yes. When Alec had almost died in his arms, their bond had been at its weakest, and all that he had felt had been a dull absence for those few moments Alec hadn’t breathed. Thus, he couldn’t even begin to imagine what Alec had gone through…

Then, it occurred to Jace that if Alec had been in pain while surrounded by demons…

“And what happened? What did you do? Weren’t you in the middle of a battle?”

Alec cleared his voice. “Magnus and the others protected me from the attacks.”

“Were you on the ground? Could you move?”

“Jace…I suddenly felt something like a bolt strike me through the heart, and the pain was so…and when I realized that it was coming from you, and then I couldn’t feel you anymore, I…yeah, I fell on the ground. No, I couldn’t move.”

Jace fell silent. His heart was in his throat. 

"Alec, I'm so sorry. I – I failed, I couldn’t keep my promise, and if it weren’t for Clary, the entire Downworld –"

“Shhh,” Alec shushed him, kissing his hand once more.

“Don’t you regret trusting me?”

“I regret,” Alec hesitated, “I regret not being there next to you. That’s all. It’s over now, things turned out well, and, honestly, right about now…I’m tired of worrying about what could've happened or not.”

The finality in his voice shut Jace up. Things couldn’t be changed at that point, Alec was right...and Jace sank into the water a little more.   

Alec looked odd, however, Jace suddenly noticed. He was nervous, fidgeting with their joined hands. There was something he wasn’t telling him. “Alec, did - something else happen?”

Alec wasn’t looking him in the eyes. A nagging thought started edging at the back of Jace’s mind…

“Alec, look at me.”

Alec, reluctantly, did …and Jace understood what had happened. “You – you didn’t…Alec, you didn’t try to kill yourself, did you?!”

Alec’s lowered eyes were answer enough.

Jace couldn’t breathe. He shot upright in the tub, panic flaring up his insides.

“Alec!”

“What, Jace?!” Alec shot back, defiantly.

“You can’t – if I die you need to live…”

He couldn’t be the cause for Alec’s death!

“No, I don’t! I swore an oath, and I mean every word of it! Where thou diest, will I die.”

“But–”

“You don’t understand what it was like! I felt broken, empty, like all the light had gone from the world! I was catatonic. I saw the other side of a world without you, and I could never live in it…Jace, I can’t!”

The sudden silence left a ringing in Jace’s ears. He was staring at Alec wide-eyed, his heart pumping wildly in his chest, as he slowly took in his words.

“What if it had been you, wouldn’t you want me to live?” he still asked him.

“Of course. But I only know what I would do.” Alec's voice made it clear that he wasn’t going to relent.

They were still staring at each other, breathing hard.

In the end, it was Jace who gave in. He leaned his head forward until it was touching Alec’s, wiping the tears that had escaped from both his and Alec’s eyes. 

“I couldn’t live in a world without you in it, either,” Jace whispered.

Jace was finally under the covers of his bed, and Alec had truly no more energy in his body. Jace had his eyes closed, but he reopened them in hearing him approach.

“Will you stay?” Jace asked, a plead in his voice.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

 Alec heard the door of his room open, and, thanks to the light entering from the corridor, he saw the small frame of Jace come in. He was surprised, to say the least. He liked the new kid his parents had brought home, they had already trained together more than once, and he had been really impressed – if a little jealous – by Jace’s unprecedented skills, even though he was younger than him.

But, besides that, Jace had been generally distant, closed off. He had had a glimpse of why when he had found him crying on the roof of the Institute. That had surprised him, too. The sight alone had made his stomach clench nervously. Still, it had spurred something in him, and he hadn’t been able to restrain himself from going to sit by him, despite Jace's protests. He had shared his snack with him, and Jace had reluctantly made him promise to not tell anyone that he was crying for his father’s death. Alec had promised. He didn't understand why, but he had felt very protective of Jace ever since that moment.

Another time, he had heard Jace’s screams come from the room right beside him, and he hadn't thought twice about going to wake him up and try to comfort him, in any way he could.

That must’ve been the reason why Jace now felt confident, or comfortable, enough, to go to him. The thought pleased Alec. 

“Did you have another nightmare?” he asked him.

Jace nodded stiffly. “Can I... can I stay here?”

That surprised Alec even more, but he nodded eagerly. 

“Of – of course.”

Alec moved a bit further into the bed to make space for Jace. He suddenly felt nervous at the prospect of having him be so close…but he couldn’t very well kick him out.

Jace came under the covers. Alec didn’t know what to say, so they stayed in silence, facing each other, for what seemed like an eternity. It was thankfully dark enough that they didn’t have to look each other in the eye.

“Do you want to tell me what it was about?” Alec asked tentatively, at last. The thought of Jace battling tricky demons like nightmares made him uneasy – he remembered how long it took Izzy to get rid of them.

Alec heard movement, Jace must’ve shook his head. He had expected that. He still felt the need to help him more, somehow. If he just let Jace fall asleep so that he could have another nightmare, what was the point of him being there? Alec tried to search his brain for a solution, something. 

“You know…my mom says that nightmares are just images conjured by our brain when we’re afraid of something. She used to make Izzy, and me as well, tell what we were scared about before going to bed…it didn’t always work, but it helped a bit, I guess. Do you want to try?”

Jace squirmed a bit, obviously uncomfortable at the idea.

“I’ll go first,” Alec offered. He didn’t wait for Jace’s response. “I’m scared…of not being able to be as good a Shadowhunter as my parents expect me to be. I just – I’m afraid of disappointing them.”

Jace was still silent, but Alec could’ve sworn the air surrounding him had softened, so he went on.

“Oh, and I’m afraid of demons.”

“Demons?” Jace's disbelief was clear. “We’re demon hunters!”

“I know. That’s why I’m scared. We’ll have to spend the rest of our lives fighting them, and one of them will probably kill me…so yeah, I’m afraid for when I’ll have to actually face them.”

Alec had meant to open himself up a bit to encourage Jace to do the same, but now that he had voiced some of his deepest fears…Alec was starting to feel uncomfortable, embarrassed even. Would Jace judge him? Think he was weak? Would he make fun of him in front of the others from now on? Angel, he was regretting this already.

His discomfort must’ve showed, because Jace suddenly started to speak. Alec’s heart was pumping in his ears.

“I’m afraid…” Jace’s voice was hesitant, but firm. Alec widened his eyes, “that I’ll never live up to my father’s expectations, too. He was – very demanding. He wouldn’t want me to cry and have nightmares about his death. He’d be…ashamed of me. He’d call me weak.”

Alec stopped breathing for a second. “I – don’t think you’re weak. I think you’re very brave…for going on with your life like you are. But your whole world has just turned upside-down, of course you’d be upset! It’s only normal, I guess. Not that I can understand what you’re going through…but if you ever feel like that again, know that I’m here, if you need anything. I – I want to be your friend, if you’d like that.”

Jace stared at him – Alec thought – for a long while, unmoving. Then he spoke again. “Alec, I – thank you. I think I’d like that, to be your friend, that is. And I think you’re brave too…I bet you’ll become the best Shadowhunter there is, after me, of course.”

Jace’s mirth was contagious, and Alec started laughing, his nervousness fading away.  He had never had a friend his age, beside his little sister. He felt…light. He had a friend.

 Alec got under the covers, immediately going to hug Jace and place his head over his (now-)beating heart. He had the feeling that he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep if he couldn’t hear that steady, reassuring sound. Warmth, peace surrounded them, and they would be fine. Alec repeated that to himself in time with Jace’s heartbeats. We will be fine, we will be fine…

Jace could probably sense his unease, because he circled him with his arms, placing a kiss on his forehead. 

“I’m afraid...” Alec started, in a whisper, “of losing you again.”

Jace breathed in, slowly, then he shifted himself until he was on his side, facing Alec, their faces only a few inches apart. “Ditto,” he whispered back.

Alec closed his eyes, letting their foreheads touch. That was a game they always played when they were kids, when Jace had been plagued by nightmares of his father’s death. After saying one fear each, they then used to fall asleep side by side with the reassurance of the other’s presence. With time, they had done it less and less…still, doing it now felt right. The first night they had voiced their fears, they had decided to become friends – and what a ride it had been since then. At the time, they could hardly have imagined they'd one day get to where they were now. Parabatai, their souls forever linked together. Lovers, going against the Law’s dictates. One of them had died, yet here they were. Alec wouldn’t change any of it, if it meant a different outcome.

The fear of losing Jace was still very much real, a painful throbbing in his chest. Jace had come this close to not come back to him…

"Don't do that, ever again," he begged him. 

"You know I can’t promise you that, Alec…but know that I really, really don’t want to die anytime soon.”

He would take that, he had to.

They gripped each other's hands as hard as they could, falling silent as they both waited for sleep to reach them. To not much avail. 

“I forgot to give you your ring back,” Alec remembered suddenly. 

He had removed it when they had gotten into the shower, then he had put it back on when he had gotten dressed and Jace had been in the tub. He now made a move for his neck, but Jace stopped him.

“Keep it.”

Alec stared at him. “I can’t keep it.”

“Why not? I want you to have it.”

“But, it’s the only thing you have that belonged to your family…”

“You are my family, Alec.” Jace’s voice made it sound like that was a thing Alec should’ve already known.

“I know that, you’re my family, too...but this is different. Your grandmother gave it to you, what if she saw me wearing it? What would she think of you giving your family ring to me?”

“You’re my parabatai, it wouldn’t be strange.”

“Yes, it would. Jace, rings are…serious stuff. Everyone knows sharing rings is a romantic gesture. I’m sorry,” Alec brought a hand to Jace’s face, trying to crease with his thumb the frown that had formed there, “you know I can’t wear it.”

Jace sighed. “What, a guy can’t be romantic towards his parabatai now?” He was grinning, but Alec knew that he was frustrated.

“Not in this world, no.” Alec got a little closer, and he slid his hand down over Jace’s body until he reached his hip, squeezing it lightly, “Not in public, at least.” He managed a smirk of his own.

Jace turned serious, however. He brought a hand to Alec’s neck and hooked his finger on the chain around it. He looked up then, and the fire Alec saw in his eyes caused a new kind of heat to start mounting in the pit of his stomach. Therefore, he wasn’t surprised when Jace pulled on the chain and brought their lips together.

Oh, how Alec had wanted to kiss Jace since the moment he had seen him in the street. He had wanted to imprint on his lips the shape of Jace’s mouth, breath the air out of his lungs to make sure that it was there. Yet, he hadn’t dared…not even among their friends, who, despite them not having told a single soul, must know.

He did it now, however, kissing Jace ten times deeper and harder than he had ever done before, if that was possible. It surely felt like that to him. Opening his mouth, he breathed Jace’s air as if he were to suffocate if he didn’t. And when he slithered a hand under Jace’s shirt, he sighed at the heat and pulsing of his skin. He pulled Jace even more to himself, and he couldn't help but notice how pliable he was in his hands, the little moans he could hear coming from Jace not far from desperate, and demanding more. This was the first kiss of Jace's new life, Alec realized. He didn't know if it meant something for Jace, but Alec was glad he had the honor, and he swore right then that he would make the most out of it, would make it worth it for Jace like never before.

Still, they were tired. They should’ve stopped, and gotten some well-deserved rest…yet, they couldn’t just ignore the bristling, live electricity that was coursing through them. There wasn’t a place in Alec’s body that didn’t feel it, or that wasn’t consumed by it. The strings connecting his life to Jace’s were pulling and writhing and claiming to be closer to him, and Alec was but a mere vessel. Jace had never felt more like a continuation of himself, so no words were needed to know that Jace was feeling the same. They were two supernovas on a path towards each other, and nothing, not even themselves, could’ve stopped the inevitable collision.

They removed each other’s clothes like two possessed men, their movements fast and frenzied like never before. The covers were soon forcefully pushed aside, no more than a nuisance for their blazing skin.

Alec pushed himself forward, and found himself on top of Jace, who promptly went to circle his hips with his legs, an unyielding grip that would surely cause bruises later. Alec would welcome them on his body proudly.

“Make me feel alive,” Jace demanded against his lips.

Alec did.

Jace felt boneless, sinking deep into the mattress as if he were made of jelly. He was caressing Alec’s head, playing with his hair, while Alec was sprawled all over him with his face buried into his neck, his every breath sending shivers run throughout his body. Alec’s weight on him was the kind of burden he would always welcome, Jace thought, as he already wished to have him again. In fact, he didn’t think he would ever get enough of him. Their coupling had been hectic, ardent in a way that had left him gasping for air more than once, but in a way that was entirely opposite to what had happened earlier on the lake shore, thank the Angel (literally).

Yet, despite their urgency, it had still not been sex…no, with Alec he never had just sex - and he, more than most people, could tell the difference.

Whether was it slow and affectionate, or rough and passionate, they made love.  Countless sexual partners – for how fun and enjoyable – had never come close to fill the hole that he didn’t know he had in his heart, while only one touch from Alec managed to do that, and so much more.

This time wasn’t any different. Alec had held him, had fulfilled his every wish, had given him all that he wanted, be that to be fucked as if there were no tomorrow, to be softly touched, or to be joined deep with him, to reach that closeness that he had so craved for since they had collided on the streets of Alicante. He had needed that as if his life depended on it…and in a sense, it did. Only when he couldn’t have told where one of them ended and the other started, did Jace’s soul finally find its peace. Only when they had muffled their screams against each other’s mouths, as they came undone, had Jace truly felt alive.

That might turn out to be a problem, in the future, he mused. If as they were now – pressed together, holding each other in the most intimate way, coming down from an unprecedented high – already wasn’t enough…

Jace was starting to realize why this kind of intimacy between parabatai was forbidden. Their souls were already so deeply interwoven together...if they shared their hearts and bodies as well, they might lose themselves in each other. The main purpose of parabatai pairs was to be enhanced soldiers, and having them divert their focus from their sacred duty to be with each other couldn’t be welcomed. Yet...how did they expect two people, who willingly knit their souls together, to not be quite as close as they could be, when they were closer with each other than any other mortal (or immortal) could ever be with anybody else? In no way was it not an unfair request, or a cruel one.

As if responding to Jace's own desire – a fact that was very likely – Alec started kissing his neck, leaving a wet trail all over it until he reached his chin, the side of his mouth, his lips... Jace welcomed him by holding him even closer to himself, all the while he started tracing the runes on Alec’s back. Alec moaned at the shivers that were being sent to his body at every new touch, and Jace smiled against his lips. 

Jace could reason with himself all he wanted, about how the road they had taken might be even trickier further along than they thought it would be; that still wouldn’t make him regret any of this.

Abruptly, he flipped them over, laughing at the surprised sound that came out of Alec. Positioning himself better between Alec’s legs, he quickly covered any further protest with his mouth, and Alec gave in into the kiss with eager abandon. Jace sure loved when Alec put himself into his hands, as if he was giving him everything that he was, saying it’s yours, it’s always been yours.

And the fervor and devotion with which Jace took him managed to shake both of them to the core. They might have to apologize to a few people the next day, for how loud they were - if they didn’t know before, they now surely did. Jace would still never regret any desperate I love you being shouted against slick, burning skin.

Only much later, was Jace finally, tiredly, contentedly falling asleep against Alec’s chest…when he had to let out a sound of protest at his parabatai leaving the bed.

“What the–”

“Sorry, but we can’t fall asleep like that. If someone arrives tomorrow to check on you…”

Alec was walking around the room, butt-naked, collecting the clothes they had thrown away…and Jace had to shake his head in disbelief. "Are you kidding me right now?"

He was not. Unbelievable...Alec, always the sensible one, even after Jace had just, pretty much, fucked his brain out. It was amusing, really, and Jace resorted in enjoying the view, as he put on the clothes he was given without protesting too much (he might've protested a bit more at being given his ring back). The faces Alec made at him in noticing his stare, while a blush spread from his face to all over his chest, were also very entertaining. It made Jace positively giddy, knowing that he could still embarrass Alec. 

Now dressed, Alec was coming towards him again, finally…until he dived for the arm chair in the corner, starting to push it towards the bed.

“What in the world are you doing?” Jace couldn’t mask the outrage from his voice.

Alec looked apologetic, but he didn’t budge. “What did I just tell you? We can’t risk being caught sleeping together, even with our clothes on. One rumor is all we need…”

“I just died. I think my parabatai is justified in wanting to be close to me under these circumstances, don’t you think?”

“Not this close, Jace,” Alec’s voice had turned somber, and the pinch of sadness he could sense in him made Jace stop protesting. He still sighed morosely.

Alec positioned himself on the chair, which had been put as close as possible to the bed as it could be. Alec tried to fold his long limbs to fit into it, but it was mostly a lost cause.

Jace moved towards the side of the bed where Alec was, and he outstretched a hand.

“You’re too far away.”

Jace knew that he was pouting, but he couldn’t help it. That was the opposite of what he wanted.

Alec took his hand, but, needless to say, it was an uncomfortable arrangement. After a while he rose from the chair in frustration, pushing it forcefully away, and kneeled on the floor instead. He laid his head on the bed, facing Jace.

“I’m here." A pause. "I love you.” 

Jace always thought that words could never be enough to convey all that they were to each other and felt for each other, but the way Alec said it, had embedded in every sound all the pain he had felt at losing him, all the joy at having him again, all the need to never let him go.

“I love you too, Alec.” And Jace tried to convey the same.

Alec interlocked their hands again, and, this time, with both their arms on the bed, they fit perfectly. It still wasn't the perfect outcome, but it would have to be enough.

Jace closed his eyes...and the fact that at the end of a day like that - the day of his death and resurrection - the last thing he saw was the face of his parabatai, the other half of him, the most important and beloved person in the world to him…didn’t make it all so bad.

Eventually, Jace could feel the sleep finally closing in on him. Nightmares might plague him…his heart might start aching – despite how much he wished it wouldn’t – for his father’s death, again…but his breathing was synced with Alec’s, and he was at peace.

His last conscious act was tightening his grip on Alec’s hand.

Neither of them could see it, deep in their slumber…but their runes were glowing.

[fraddit]

autumn tag game🍁🍁

Tagged by @milanima  Thank you!  I feel so popular today!

The last:

1. drink : water

2. phone call: my sister

3. text message: forwarded an anti-capitalist tumblr post to my husband

4. song you listened to: Mazzy Star – Look on Down From the Bridge (currently playing)

5. time you cried: uhhh... *thinks* Wednesday morning?

6. dated someone twice: nope

7. kissed someone and regretted it: I guess? Kinda?  Meh, not really.  I mean in hindsight the dude sucked but, whatever.

8. been cheated on: no

9. lost someone special: Yes, actually my cousin died a few years ago and his birthday is tomorrow and he died a week after that.  So it’s on my mind this time of year.

10. been depressed: I currently am and have been a lot, but I’m seeing a professional now!

11. got drunk and thrown up: nope

3 favorite colours

12. Gray

13. dark gray 

14. light gray

in the last year have you

15. made new friends: I’m sure trying to!  Gosh I’m so bad at tumblr…

16. fallen out of love: no

17. laughed until you cried: It’s a weekly goal

18. found out someone was talking about you: I have no idea

19. met someone who changed you: ummm, maybe?

20. found out who your friends are: I already knew

21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: Does my husband count?

general

22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: Most of them

23. do you have any pets: No pets currently.  My cat passed away recently.

24. do you want to change your name: I love my name.

25. what did you do for your last birthday: Um, probably nothing?  Did we go to a restaurant I like?  Maybe that was last year?  No idea.

26. what time did you wake up: Sometime around 7 or so

27. what were you doing at midnight last night: Scrolling tumblr to read all the reactions to THE EPISODE of Once

28. name something you can’t wait for: My kneejerk, joke response was “death.”  For real… I’m hoping to finish a manip I’ve been working on soon.

29. when was the last time you saw your mum: Uhhh… *thinks* was it like a month ago?  No idea.

31. what are you listening to right now: Now the song that’s playing is Massive Attack - Teardrop

32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: My dad’s name is Tom, so yes.

33. something that is getting on your nerves: Uhhh, my depression? My adhd? The current state of the world?

34. most visited website: Tumblr, tumblr, and more tumblr (I have a problem)

35. hair colour: brown

36. long or short hair: buzzed

37. do you have a crush on someone: Does Colin O’Donoghue count?

38. what do you like about yourself: Haha, nothing.  That was a joke.  Uhmmm, sense of humor?  Intelligence?

39. piercings: 11 on my ears

40. blood type: I honestly don’t know

41. nickname: none

42. relationship status: married

43. zodiac: cancer

44. pronouns: She/Her

45. favourite tv show: To watch, that’s currently running? Probably Brooklyn Nine-Nine for actual enjoyment, but I spend 98% of my time thinking about Once Upon a Time.

46. tattoos: none

47. right or left handed: right

(did you notice that number 30 is missing? If you did, kudos! PM me and I’ll humorously predict your future😄) - I didn’t notice

first

48. surgery: 11 baby teeth removed in middle school because they didn’t fall out on their own 

49. piercing: I got my ears pierced in second grade, I think?  So like 7.

50. sport: To play? I’ve never really played a sport. Just like gym class stuff.

51. vacation: Disneyland when I was 4

52. pair of trainers: Who actually knows the answer to this?

more general

53. eating: nothing

54. drinking: nothing

55. i’m about to: work on my manip instead of homework

56. waiting for: the will to do homework instead of anything else

57. want: for my manip to look super fucking awesome

58. get married: already am

59. career: I don’t have one.  I’d like to write for a living, novels or shows or something, I think.

which is better

60. hugs or kisses: hugs

61. lips or eyes: eyes

62. shorter or taller: taller

63. older or younger: are these for romantic partners or what?  My husband is only a few months older than me.  I don’t have a preference.

64. nice arms or nice stomach: Yes?

65. hook up or relationship: relationship

66. troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant troublemaker

have you ever

67. kissed a stranger: nope

68. drank hard liquor: just sips for tastings

69. lost glasses/contact lenses: no

70. turned someone down: yes

71. sex on the first date: never did

72. broken someone’s heart: yeah

73. had your heart broken: yeah

74. been arrested: no

75. cried when someone died: both real and fictional

76. fallen for a friend: yes, and now we’re married

do you believe in

77. yourself: hahaha… no. But I’m trying to work on that.

78. miracles: no

79. love at first sight: no

80. santa claus: no

81. kiss on the first date: go for it?  This question is weirdly categorized…

82. angels: no

other

83. current best friend’s name: I’ve got a few lifelong friends.  They’re not going anywhere.

84. eye colour: Green with brown around the pupils

85. favourite movie: I always say Raiders of the Lost Ark

This thing is a beast, so I’m tagging anyone who actually read this to the end.  Tag me if you do it.

[themeybeme-blog]

  I lost my dad when I was seventeen. Some people lose their dad when they're in their 30's or 40's or later. Some lose him when they're younger than fifteen, and some don't have a dad at all. But I did. And he died when I was seventeen.

  I got the call after a football game we'd won. I always thought it was weird he wasn't there, since he came to every game I had before, but I figured he might've been busy or something. I went to the hospital and he was laying there, smiling, telling me he was fine, that it would all blow over soon while they wheeled him into surgery. I couldn't stop crying. I didn't change out of my uniform for another 24 hours, and stood there with the pads and everything and my helmet in my hands. I didn't want to leave. I was afraid I couldn't get back, or something would happen, or... I don't know.

  He was in the hospital for a total of two months and thirteen days. I skipped school for a week and when he found out, he was ready to get out of the bed and shake me, so I went back. Every day single after my last class ended, I ditched a seventh period study hall and took a 2:36 bus to the hospital. On the weekends, I would wake up and get us breakfast at a coffee shop. He pretended to like the hospital food, but I knew he hated it. He loved blueberry muffins, and I would get a banana nut muffin for myself, and we'd sit and watch TV or talk or just act like he wasn't sitting in a hospital with a chronic heart condition. I didn't know the details, and I didn't understand what the doctors told me.

  He told me over and over that everything would be okay, that he hardly felt sick at all and just wanted to get out of the bed and go home. I'd never really been afraid of anything in my life up until that moment. I might've been afraid of the dark when I was little, or afraid of monsters in my closet, but I'd never been scared of something that wasn't mysterious. Something that was happening right before me, that was inevitable, that I couldn't stop and I had to watch. It felt like slow motion, but time moved faster than ever. I can't explain it.

  I remember everything about the day he died. I remember what I had for breakfast, what the guy across from me on the bus was wearing, what color earrings the nurse had. My heart hurt and my head ached and I cried while I sat alone in the waiting room with nowhere else to go, no one to see, not knowing what to do with myself. I didn't leave until they kicked me out, and even then, I sat on the curb in front of the building and cried harder. Security told me to go home, but I didn't. I took a long, long walk until I saw the sun rise again. After that, everything is sort of a blur.

  He was always really social, really happy. He'd be an optimist about anything, but I didn't understand why his funeral was so short and empty. An old woman who knew him since he was my age stood at the podium and told a story about how he'd helped her, and called him the sweetest man she'd ever met. A few of his friends from work showed up and shook my hand and told me they were sorry and left. I got up to the podium when my time came, and didn't know what to say. I'd tried to write a speech or something, just something, so I wouldn't say nothing, but I stood there and looked out at the faces I didn't know and my hands shook. That was the first time I ever thought about killing myself. I wanted to go to the bridge, climb the fence and step off, but all I could hear is my father's voice in the back of my head telling me how cold the water was, and how it'd be terrible to die while freezing.

  I started failing in school, but it was too late in the year to really affect my GPA, and I graduated. The principle and teachers and staff all apologized to me, students that I knew came up and said they were sorry a hundred times. A girl I remembered from a party came up and kissed my cheek and hugged me, and my ex who hadn't spoken to me in a year said she'd be there if I needed anything.

  I was a waiter at the time, and took a second job as a mechanic. I didn't know too much about cars, but my dad loved them, so I knew the basics. I didn't really like cars and didn't see the appeal but I figured it would be money in my pocket. Being there reminded me of my dad, sort of. Whenever an old one came in. I worked as much as I could to avoid being where I was staying. I didn't have a guardian for the next 8 months, so until I turned eighteen, the state found me somewhere to live.

  There wasn't anything wrong with the place, and the family was nice. They let me keep my dog, even if he was a bit too big for the house. I got my license and drove out to the beach on the nights I wasn't working and watched the water and wondered how long it would take to drown. I thought about walking as far out as I could go until my feet didn't touch the ground anymore. About dunking my head underneath, and counting, and seeing how far I could get before everything went black. Life wasn't that bad, honestly, and I didn't know why the thoughts came in my head. I worked, I had a roof over my head, I had people who tried to care about me, and yet, I thought about killing myself more than any coincidental natural urges people experienced once in a while. I didn't tell anyone.

  I always smoked a little in High School. I only started because of the whole 'why not' when someone asked if I wanted one. I never did anything too rebellious, and that was probably the worst of it. After I graduated, I smoked a lot more. It calmed me down. It didn't stop the urges, but it let me breathe, it let my eyes close off the vacant stare that was glued to my face in every waking moment I had. I didn't sleep much. I found out later it qualified as insomnia, the kind that people take medication for. I tried sleeping meds, but after a while, I stopped caring. I'd go to diners late at night and get a slice of pie with ice cream and take as long as I could to eat it.

  I spent a lot of my time alone. After high school, I lost connection with almost all of my friends, and being as socially stunned as I was, I didn't make many friends at all at work or wherever else I was. At the diner, a waiter who worked the early mornings and late nights would sit with me if it was slow and talk to me as best he could, but that was about the extent I had of real human interaction. Even when people talked to me I gave short answers and didn't expand on anything; I didn't want to be rude, but I didn't want to talk. Some understood, some took it personally.