#i fucking got you dude. i got you

[brainrotdotorg]

imagine a dashboard for alligators. what do you think that would look like

2 notes

🍏gatoridae Follow

Controversial opinion. If you're doing nothing but eating meat, what are you even doing. Remember to include bugs, fruits, and legumes into your diet in order to help aid digestion of the meat that you get from snakes, fish, and mammals.

Just because we have the reputation for eating lots of meat, that doesn't mean we have to stick to it.

🥒biting-you-biting-you Follow

counterpoint: fuit yucky

🪵blog-from-a-bog Follow

wdym reputation of eating meat. i float lik ea log thats what im known for

4,904 notes

🌿swamp-ass Follow

asked dad if i could go and steal some Floridian guy's lunch and he said "we have prey at home" girl we have been doing shit ALL DAY i am an awesome 600 pounds and I need some meat left on me to deathroll with. let me get a quick snack that i don't need to kill mmmmmmm burgers I want people food soooooo badddd....... i know they shouldn't feed it to me but I have such a lovely smile oh please oh please give me your burger.........

182 notes

🥗aliali-seeyoulater Follow

mom says it was cold the season she laid me so i have to be a girl. because girls are always born from eggs laid during cold seasons.

cope and seethe mother first of all, second of all, the reason i am transgender is because you kept me too fucking snuggly warm in the nest.

#i guess if you wanted a daughter you should have. idk. made a shittier nest? #thats not really my fault man

81,337 notes

⛰fuckyeahhugesnout Follow

You'll never guess how I just learned that we have the honor of being the "loudest reptiles in the world"

🫑teethem Follow

Yeah yeah, the 90 decibel mating bellow, we've all heard it.

🤢ch0mper Follow

we've all heard the what

135,633 notes

🩲gaytorrr Follow

this guy asked if i wanted to see his gator hole and i said fuck yes. why this boy take me into a 65 foot long hole in the mud at the bottom of the lake

6,421 notes

🏞daily-clawsitivity

✨Remember to take it easy sometimes!✨We thrive in slow-moving waters!✨Even though we can run fast, we get tired fast too-- it's okay to let yourself take breaks!✨Let yourself relax, that's how we made it this far as a species.

mud-rocks-deactivated20140706

Yeah, imagine telling your prehistoric great great great great great great great great great great grandpa or something to calm down and relax when he should be doing nothing but deathrolls. the longevity of the species should be your only goal. It's irresponsible to encourage your fucking species to fall behind even more than it already has? Have some pride, you're not a crocodile.

scalesssss-deactivated20150310

jesus christ calm down

alidile-crocogator-deactvated20140709

Okay, this post has a lot of misconceptions in it. There aren't as many differences between crocodiles and alligators than you think. It's really harmful to think that we have nothing in common with each other. So what if they're carnivores and we're closer to omnivores, or their snouts are more U shaped while ours are V shaped. We're both badass miracles of nature that have no reason to be pit against one another all the time.

Don't listen to guys like this. It's just hateful and small-minded.

stop-jawlock-androll-deactivated20140911

crocs are like. like them shoes that float right

wetlandia898 Follow

i wish i was a crocodile because i could have a virgin birth and i wanted to see what it would be like to eat an immaculate conception.

bigchallengesrealblog-deactivated20190412

welcome to the no notes gator/croc discourse post.

🦖l8rg8tr-z Follow

omg this is the post.... i can't believe i would see this naturally on my dash

🎍taildraggers Follow

Uh are we just going to ignore the virgin birth reply orrrrrrrrr

🐊gator-heritage-posts

gator heritage post

0 notes

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Follow

hgwiow h

hsfhjs

howw ws i nbevyrboy tyopingssaog oo vd wi hhrth rh thrre cl alawas ?>>

🌴a-l-g-t-r Follow

lmao this idiot never learned how to use their tail to type

#/j lol yeah its kind of hard at first #actually i'd say cut your losses and forget how to type bring the laptop back to the dumpster its not worth it

39 notes

🐍bellowbellowmygoodfellow Follow

am i fucking stupid. i just learned theres another species of alligator other than just me and the guys in my swamp. and i said "oh wow I didn't know that! which one of the two are we haha" and my buddy just stared at me like I was a fucking idiot. how am i supposed to know if no one ever tells me this . WHICH AM I

🍖meet-eat3r Follow

there are only 70-80 mature chinese gators in existence while there are 750,00-1 million mature american gators . do the math.

🐍bellowbellowmygoodfellow Follow

i could have just hatched you don't know me.

20,570 notes

🍀gatortears Follow

a group of queer gators in church call that a congregaytion

#reblogging this one bc none of you appreciate me

1 notes

👞makemeintoshoesdaddy Follow

I'm seeing the no notes gator/croc post circulate again and ha ha yes it's very funny, but we are NOT starting gator/croc discourse in 2024. lets leave that shit in the past. i know that's not what the post really ended up being about but i am soooooo sick of it.

🌾clawstothewalls Follow

okay, so the one with a fetish for getting turned into handbags is gonna talk down to us now.

👞 makemeintoshoesdaddy Follow

Not to be a pedant but its Shoes Actually. It even says so in the name. Shoes.

2,663 notes

[bastardlybonkers]

feetman

[just-null-cult]

i love the more well known characters and all but im pushin them all aside to focus on those in the back. i love background characters so fucking much. ino..... ino come back..

[dizzybizz]

ms jay herself (and apple)

[swordsonnet]

i did not have "james somerton stealing the title for his second apology video from hbomberguy" on my 2024 bingo card

[reallilystuff]

big kibby = big sleebgy cuddle. loaf cat vs employee who literally cannot sleep on the job who will win (hint: it's loaf cat 🍞)

[nat-20s]

Honestly I get why narratively speaking they had a Super Mega Tragic Separation for Donna and The Doctor because you KNOW that if they hadn't been every single Doctor would've dealt with trauma by disappearing on their current companions to go have a movie night with the bestie. They straight up would've:

[biscuitfacegrey]

Doodles from Ep 51 that are uninteresting to look at because they’re on a white background‼️

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

Aw, no. No, sweetie, no.

Garth. Baby boy. You are so stupid. Incredibly sweet but stupid. I can guarantee you that Roy would be better with an absentee Oliver Queen then he would be with RUDY AND MARY WEST.

Whooooo boy. This isn't- this isn't even, like, a writer just not knowing Wally's lore or whatever, this is MARK FUCKING WAID writing this. Do you comprehend what that means?? DO YOU?!?

That man in that kitchen is two seconds away at all times from going full Ted Bundy. I'm not even fucking joking. It is so insane how much I am not joking.

Wally's father is dangerous. He ran a work camp for children and planned on using land mines on them! He sold his son to a death cult!!! He hired a hitman to kill his wife!!!!!

But he's also really fucking good at playing the part of the 'normal suburban Dad' and that's what Waid is showing REALLY FUCKING WELL HERE. Rudy is playing his part and he's playing it well. Don't think I didn't notice Rudy dropping the coffee pot in front of Wally and fucking smirking when it 'magically' popped back up on the counter. This is a man who knows about his son's powers and is playing along. This man is a problem.

And I'm super excited to see how Waid plans for this story to progress.

[teaboot]

As a kid I remember I felt real awkward and useless when other kids cried and as an adult seeing kids cry I still feel awkward and useless but I remember I hated being watched or talked to during a cry so to this day my go-to is "hey bud it seems like you're having a bad time so I'm just gonna sit here on the floor in solidarity, take your time tho" and it's probably not the best way to help but it's the best I've got and so far it hasn't backfired so. That's what I'm gonna keep doing I guess

[shivroy]

what if the tomshiv baby wasn't aborted and turned out to be just like a weird cunt. this is my unadulterated vision

[1495-gauge]

there's that fucked up three-eyed thing that lives in the woods. whose turn is it to chase it off again??

[skrunksthatwunk]

meant to be seen and not heard; meant to be felt, not seen

[jaylaxies]

AINT NO WAY?? FUCKING HELL JAEMIN

[sarcasticsra]

Clawing my face off at the meta of the last ep

Impulse and hyper vigilance hooking up so he’s aware of the danger but not too frozen by paranoia to act

Attention standing up against confusion to reprioritize what’s important and lock away unchecked ambition

Pleasure starting to realize that doing the right thing can feel good! But still being tempted by greed

Conscience finally having some power to direct the brain!

(Hopefully culminating in Elias’ realization that each function of the brain can be both rewarding and helpful when implemented in a healthy manner and destructive and isolating when implemented in an unhealthy manner…)

Everything about this season is incredible

[coolcarabiner]

lesbians who are terfs will never make any sense to me crying about the supposed exclusivity of the “female experience” like my brother in christ she experienced an othered, lonely, confusing childhood where she was made to feel inadequate in her gender, sexuality, or both just the same as you and instead of letting this unify you against patriarchy you just enforce it on other people to maintain the sliver of “power” you think you have. how do u not see how dumb this is oh my god