#i have a crippling addiction to making playlists

[kquil]

🧁: cupcake

tell me about yourself, as much or as little as possible and i will ship you with whichever marauder i think you will go well with!

hi! congrats on 1k!! i love reading your writing <33 this is my first time requesting :))

i have lighter brown hair that has a few natural blonde highlights from the sun and blue/gray eyes. i’m about 5’3” and am really quite pale. i would describe my style to be a mix between whimsigoth and dark academia. i have 2 tattoos, one of my star sign constellation (pisces) and one of a hibiscus but i am definitely going to get a lot more. i am more on the introverted side and really appreciate my alone time but when i’m with my friends i could hang out forever (probably bc of my crippling FOMO tbh-). i love music and making playlists and i actually play the bass and sing a little. one of my major hobbies is theatre and acting- i love being on stage. i’m a slytherin but definitely have a little hufflepuff deep down. i love watching criminal minds and horror movies but also appreciate really cheesy romance movies. i have a major minor caffeine addiction- both coffee and tea. i love travelling and reading and writing occasionally. id say my love language is quality time with a little side of physical touch and maybe a little bit of words of affirmation.

anyway i think that’s about me in a nutshell ! thank you so much and once again congrats 🫶🏻 !!

Thank you for the congratulations, darling and thank you for sending in this request, i hope it’s to your liking despite it coming very very late (｡Ó﹏Ò｡)

i ship you with, Remus Lupin

i. you often ‘borrow’ remus’ fluffy and thick sweaters on especially chill days. they were so big that they swamped your frame but that was how you liked it and you liked that they fit your dark academia aesthetic too. remus doesn’t mind, but acts like you owe him for being so generous with lending out his clothing — “you’re nice and toasty because of my sweater so you should help keep me warm,” was his most common excuse but that often led to you cuddling up against his chest, between his legs and on his bed while you read separate books. it was the perfect way to spend an evening together. 

ii. compared to remus, you’re quite short but he loves that about you, especially when you’re dressed in your whimsigoth attire. he thinks you’re adorable and always has this urge to hold you to him – like you’re his own pretty fairy, small and beautiful and someone he doesn’t think he could ever live without – but doesn’t want to come across as clingy so he usually just ends up fiddling around with the fabric of your clothes. you’ve come to see the gesture as a sign that remus needed to be cuddled so whenever you feel a slight tug on your clothing, you immediately turn to cuddle up against your boyfriend.

iii. when you and remus first got together, you were quite nervous about meeting his friends, especially because you knew how close they were. But, over time and with some prompting from remus, you’ve gotten just as close with the boys as remus has; you share a lot of sweets and inside jokes with peter, you help sirius with styling his hair and clothes and james likes to ask you for advice with lily. the boys often refer to you as ‘the missus’ or ‘remus’ girl’ or their ‘sister in law’ because you were all practically family to each other. 

iv. the time remus discovered your tattoos, he was entranced by them, he thought they looked beautiful on you and he’s grown to habitually kiss them whenever you two were intimate with each other. you’ve told him how you debated getting a tattoo dedicated to him, which he blushed at. he was incredibly flattered that you would want something of him permanently on your skin. you were strongly against getting a full moon however; you didn’t want something that caused him so much grief to represent him on your body, instead, you opted for tattooing a matching scar of his onto your own body – it was a favourite of yours and perfectly placed across the upper right side of his abdomen. “Why?” he asked you in disbelief when he saw your new tattoo, tracing it with his finger gently as his other hand moved to press against the matching scar on his own body. “because i think it’s beautiful,” was your answer and ohhhh how you made him melt!

v. one summer, you and remus decided to go on holiday together for a week before the full moon and he fully got to appreciate your love for coffee. you woke up to do mornings with coffee, spent the evening with tea and remus, being the loving and observant boyfriend that he was, helped brew you tea and coffee whenever that time of the day came along. It took you one time to show him how you liked your tea and coffee for him to nail it over and over again. he’s your little barista~

vi. your holiday together was spent in an airbnb located in a countryside village, watching criminal minds, horror movies and cheesy romance films in bed together, going on long walks and reading and writing at cute cafes. It was so relaxing and you had never felt so at peace… until the marauders decided to crash the party and surprise you two with a spontaneous visit of your little get-away together. It wasn’t an unwelcome visit, in fact, you were just beginning to miss the boys and they showed up just in time. “I knew it! I knew you missed us!” james cheered and sirius laughs with his arm thrown over peter’s shoulders, the three of them grinning widely at yours and remus’ cuddled up forms.

vii. as much as remus loved having the boys around, however, he wanted to be alone with you more so he set about planning a scheme to encourage their departure without making it too obvious — his plan: to be as lovey-dovey with you as they were willing to stomach and amping it up every time.

viii. “you’re so beautiful today, my love,” remus coos into your ear before pressing a kiss against your cheek. “No no no, let me get that for, my dear,” remus insists, hurrying to open the door for you to enter as he leans his face down and smiles expectantly. with a giggle, you kiss him sweetly as thanks and enter while the boys in the background pull faces at the lovey atmosphere you two were setting. “we can share the blanket, darling,” remus calls and opens his arms so you could run up to cuddle into his chest with the blanket wrapped around both of you. you were already wearing remus’ thick sweater but cuddling with him made you feel especially warm, which was needed for the chilly night. The rest of the boys glare at the two of you, feeling especially lonely as they look on with their marshmallows over the open fire and glaring when remus looks up from kissing you and smirks at their pathetic, shivering appearance under unbearably thin blankets.   

ix. by the end of day 2, they were packing their bags. “remmy…” you sighed and narrowed your eyes at your boyfriend after the two of you waved the boys goodbye. “yes, sweetheart?” he asks, pressing a kiss to your cheek after taking a strand of your blonde hair behind your ear. “i know what you did! i didn’t know you could be so devious!” he grins as you pout, “darling, i’m a marauder too, y’know~”

1K MILESTONE EVENT : CLOSED | NAVI.

[munchflix]

MUNCHFLIX - HELLRAISER (2022)

IMDB BLURB: A take on Clive Barker's 1987 horror classic where a young woman struggling with addiction comes into possession of an ancient puzzle box, unaware that its purpose is to summon the Cenobites.

WARNINGS: Gore, sex, butts, flesh suits, drug use, addiction themes, and general Clive Barker levels of weirdness. GIFs under the cut contain gore-type stuff

RATING: HAWT.

Munch: I've already seen this twice. I would happily see it six more times. And I might.

Biscuits: We have already both seen this, we watched it together but we're gonna watch it again for Munchflix and pretend we haven't seen it.

M: And Biscuits is gonna play with slime and combat his crippling margarita addiction.

B: I'm not an alchoholic.

M: Denial is the first stage. We open in Belgrade, Serbia. I don't know why.

B: I don't know what Serbia has to do with it. There's a lady picking up a mysterious package from a random guy. She's shopping on behalf of Mr. Voight. And then we're at some weird party which is being put on by Mr. Voight.

M: And then there's this hunky twink guy. I think he's possibly a sex worker. There's some people just fucking in the corner. He comes and talks to the mystery woman from earlier, we can't tell if he's just really into cougars or just really out of place at the party. They establish that Mr. Voight would be really happy to meet this guy.

B: He's into twinks, apparently.

M: Or murder! Probably murder, this IS a Hellraiser movie.

B: And if you DO drugs, you go to hell before you die.

M: The twink gets access to the super secret puzzle box vault and we see the Lament, which is fucking BITCHIN' in this movie. It has so many cool ass phases and for once, c-gen is on my side, even though most of the effects on the box look practical. I'd love to know which it is. Either way, I love it. It's really cool to see the box get to do something more than just rotate once and then shoot out cheesy electricity.

Fun box, oh fun box, small and square and dark.

B: The Twink is like hey this is a really cool puzzle box thing you have, mind if I tinker with it? The Twink is like - hey if I solve it do I get a prize? and rich guy is like, I do! And this sets off NO red flags for this twink guy. He gets stabbed. UH OH.

M: Well that's what he gets for playing with demonic puzzle boxes in basement of a rich weirdo's mansion. I mean...the warning signs were here. Now he's going on a magical drug trip and the box is reconfiguring, and oopsie daisy...there's chains coming out of a hell place.

B: Is it inappropriate to put Fleetwood Mac's The Chain on a hellraiser playlist?

M: I'm not sure there are like...a lot of appropriate songs to put on a hellraiser playlist, but I put Rub Some Bacon on It on a Hannibal playlist so...I might not be the right person to ask.

B: He should've just rubbed some bacon on the Lament.

M: I wonder what would happen if you just like....used fake blood on it. Like stab a pig with the Lament. Would the Cenobites be like super pissed or just like, well - gotta take this pig to Hell!

B: *makes a margarita anyway* so Voight is praying to what we assume is the cenobite god, Leviathan, while the twink slowly perishes in the background and OH SEX.

M: This line kills me though...How's my speed? Is it good? WHO ASKS THAT DURING SEX? So we're introduced to Riley and her boyfriend Trevor who we kept calling Tim. And her brother and his boyfriend and their nondescript roommate.

Note: Munch specifically requested that I not make a gif of him saying this line, so I took a screenshot of it instead :)

B: Her roommate...exists. And there's Colin - fuck, Colin is such a gay name. Might as well have named him Sebastian. Or Preston. Francis. I can say this because I'm gay.

M: Okay but Colin is a mensch, he deserves better than what he gets but no spoilers.

B: Riley's overprotective brother Matt doesn't like Trevorimothy, because he seems like a junkie dude and Riley is a recovering addict.

M: These two obviously have a very healthy relationship. Riley blames everyone for her problems and Matt is a controlling douche so...

B: But Matt is right. No spoilers though. Timmy is bad. So Riley goes to hang out with her shitty boyfriend Tyler but he has an IDEA. They're gonna go steal a thing. And make lots of money. He knows of an abandoned storage unit that has a billionaires shit in it.

M: This is not at all suspicious. This part of the movie really confused me. It will make sense later but right now it's like, why did they ever think this was cool.

B: This guy looks like Chris Evans if they turned the Chris Evans slider down to like...50 percent.

M: *laughs* You right...you right.

50% opacity Chris Evans

B: Riley looks SO much like this girl I went to high school with, it's bugging me out.

M: Riley immediately abandons sobriety and starts boozing it up right before they go break into this storage unit, because that's a stunningly good idea.

B: The first step of a good heist is getting shitfaced.

M: So inside the storage unit, there is a single storage container. Which contains a single tiny vault, and inside that vault there's a BOX and inside that box there's another box but it's THE box. And again, none of this seems at all weird to Riley.

B: As the old saying goes, that's a bit sussy.

M: So hey here's the Lament, and we're gonna just take this. I'm sure it's worth something. It does have this like vantablack spot on it that I love because it just looks like a portal to nothing.

B: Matt and....Colin, are laying in bed, tits out, reading poetry to each other. This is what gay men do. They lay in bed and read Byron. But Riley is back.

M: And Matt is NOT gonna let this go. He's gotta go out there and yell at her. She's obviously drunk and lying about it but there's gonna be a fight.

B: Shitty apartment? This doesn't seem like that shitty of apartment! There's five bedrooms, Riley! But he's like, I don't care that you broke your elbow, and he kicks her out.

M: Colin is like, no don't go but Riley is outskie. She's gonna go make some BAD DECISIONS, that are gonna involve beating up her car, taking drugs and messing with a hellbox.

B: It looks like she walked like...a block away. She walked down the street to her car. Get out of my house! Okay fine! *walks down the street* She finds her secret stash of pills and pours them on the street and then is like, no wait I want my drugs.

M: Way better to be high while you're summoning demons, right? She downs three pills of unknown substance and goes and sits in the kiddie park a block away from her apartment to be all high and solve the Lament.

B: Ooh, the parts move. It's a puzzle! At least in this movie it does stuff.

M: I'm obsessed with this thing. Riley worries that she broke it but then immediately twists it up again. A blade pops out but somehow she avoids getting cut by it. This is gonna make some cenobites very unhappy. And then whoooooo the drugs kick in. For the record, if you haven't taken something in a long time, like say percocet, and then you pound three at once, you're gonna get high as shit. And not in a fun way.

B: And then pinhead is here and is like - that was your blade. This is my blade! It was meant for me! And then they literally open a hole into Riley.

M: I actually thought this was really cool. Basically turning her into a human Lament.

B: And the chains shoot out and grab Matt but nah, he's okay. Then he's like I gotta go find my sister. I don't gotta call her, she's only a block away from the house.

M: She literally is! Her car's right there! Oh shit there she is on the merry go round! That was easy. He grabs the box and accidentally stabs himself.

B: I don't know how he didn't notice the giant blade sticking out of it. Then he's like - I gotta go wash my hand right now in this stank ass bathroom. Oh yeah the box like, absorbs the blood in this one and then it starts moving on it's own.

M: We will later learn it is reconfiguring itself for a reason, because there's like 7 levels you gotta get through to get the cracker jack prize but no spoilers.

B: Oh yeah there's blood coming up out of the drain like that scene in IT, and then whoops! Hell.

M: Matt is seeing walls move around and Riley's still too stoned to know wtf is going on and then Matt SCRAEM. But she runs into the bathroom and he's gone.

B: The cops come and are like - you're high as fuck on drugs. Nothing seems out of the ordinary tho. Riley's like - oh, I know nothing. I was dead at the time. Leave me alone. Also hey there's my puzzle box.

M: Colin and roommate....Nora? Laura? Who knows. Anyway, they really wanna know where the fuck Matt is but Riley is telling them about hallucinatory monsters and bleeding hands and he went into the bathroom and just disappeared!

B: No spoilers but the roommate chick isn't that important to the movie.

M: Riley makes another good decision to run away to Treve's apartment but he's showering all sexy like so it's time for some more banging!

B: She's like no we must have sex immediately. She didn't even bring her stuff in.

M: Timbo is wildly unconcerned about his speed this time but it's moot because she's seeing cenobites.

Chatterer likes to watch

B: The one hallucination in this movie, but at least there's NO DETECTIVES.

M: I would not have loved this movie so much if there were detectives. I don't care if they were the coolest most well written detectives in the world.

B: Riley is like - hey check out this box we stole and Timmy is like - OH FUCK NO because he's a bad guy but no spoilers.

M: So they decide they gotta go figure out things about the box so they go this like hospice place to talk to Serena, the cougar from the beginning who got the box for Voight.

B: She's got cancer now or something now? We don't know why. They're like - we'd like to talk to you about our lord and saviour jesus christ.

M: But not really, they found a box and they'd like information, now! Too bad they're not detectives, they could be sitting this woman at a metal table with a single lamp playing good cop bad cop. It'd be epic. Best hellraiser movie ever.

B: But Serena does kinda know because she worked for Voight and she's like - no that box is pure evil. Trombo is being super rational right now and being like - Riley no we should really not be getting mixed up in all this box shit but Riley does not care.

This shot of the box moving inside the bag is pretty cool though.

M: Serena is harbinging really hard right now, telling them all about Voight seeing things and doing some evil shit. And then Serena is like - hey I'm just gonna take this hellbox because it's bad but then they fight over it and it gets turned again.

B: And then Serena gets stabbed which means she's gonna get dragged to hell now because that's how it works.

M: I actually have so many questions about how it works. Getting stabbed just sentences you to hell no matter what kind of person you were? There's no nothing, just helldeathpain forever because you got a cut? That's kinda fucked up.

B: I mean, the rules were pretty loose in the other films.

M: They never really do explain it very well in any of the mythos tbh. Draw your own conclusions. Meanwhile! Serena is about to have a very bad time because in this movie, getting stabbed means you goin' to hell. Riley and Tilda have fucked off to do..something else. And we get our first FUCKING TERRIFYING LOOK at the cenobites. This wheezing motherfucker is so scary to me. This death rattle noise and the exposed lungs, oh my god.

Nice lungs!

B: But the rotating torture pillar is back. And more cenobites!

M: I love that they are still very bondagey but they're literally clothed in flesh, it's honestly just the neatest thing to me. I love the look of the new ones.

B: She's looking up information about Mr. Voight on a search engine that looks like google but totally is not and she finds out that he disappeared under mysteeeeeeeeeerious circumstances, because of course he did. And a picture of his freaky millionaire house. Trevor is outside having a uh...phone call.

M: Apparently Voight was kinda kinky too, but we're not really surprised to hear that. Serena has also mysteriously disappeared.

B: It's been a minute since I had alchohol! When we did hellraiser revelations I was so drunk. Riley has deduced that the box is up to something. Colin is calling! Colin's callin. *snort laugh* Nobody appreciates my dad jokes. Colin is like Riley come back but she's not gonna because she's a woman on a mission and that mission is to uh....uh...do some shit with this box.

M: She accuses Trimothy of not believing her but he does, and he really does because he's fucking sus, and I'm kinda mad because I was rooting for him the whole movie. He's like the only dude who makes any sense in this movie.

B: Riley naturally drives all the way out to this crazy kinky ass millionaires sex mansion because that's a good idea.

M: She's made only good decisions this entire movie. I get that there's some allegories here about addiction but also, this box is obviously bad news and this millionaire guy was also obviously bad news. Riley just happens to find the one tiny window into this creepy lament configuration looking metal maze around the entire mansion. Natch.

B: *back with another margarita* what's happening?

M: *dies laughing*

B: She got into the mansion, okay. We got the house in a cage, we don't want it to get away.

Despite all its rage, it is still just a house in a cage.

M: Gotta keep my sex dungeon safe. Riley does what anybody in a horror movie would do and immediately just starts messing with shit. What does this switch do??? What does this one do??? Oh that one opens and closes weird doors. This one opens the skylight to Leviathan, god of Hell! Nifty.

B: Now she can unlock the front door. For reasons. She's gonna be like, yo Travis you gotta come see this shit. Oh yeah and she finds his creepy study which is totally intact and full of weird drawings of cenobites and tons of information just laying out about the box and hell for her to find.

M: Serena cleaned out his estate but not very well, apparently. We learn that Voight is well aware of the cenobites and box and all the configurations of the box. Each level represents a favor of some sort that can be curried from Hell if you get it throught all six configurations but no spoilers. I'd really love to see what all of these looked like.

B: And then she sees her dead brother but I guess she doesn't really know he's dead. He's just disappeared.

M: But it's not at all weird that he would also just be hanging out in the rich weirdo's mansion, but apparently he's missing some flesh and she's like OSHIT but then Colin and Troy and Roommate have all showed up.

B: How convenient. Riley is not leaving though, and Colin's gonna give her a pep talk. Riley wtf are you doing running off and running around abandoned mansions? Oh and Tony and ...N..ora are gonna go fuck around for a minute but this is actually important.

M: We know this movie is kinda slow, but believe me, the payoff at the end is fucking amazing. Stay with it.

B: Stuff happens. Trust us. Colin notices that Voight has a fuck dungeon. That's not really relevant. Now Nora is gonna do what people in a horror movie do and just press all these random weird switches! What could possibly go wrong! While Todd is drinking in the bathroom.

M: Nora opens a secret passage, because of course he has that. Colin is getting a quick overview of the lore.

B: The box offers a reward to whoever finishes it. Life, knowledge, love, sensation, resurrection, power. Long ago the six nations lived together in harmony....

What’s your pleasure, sir?

M: I'd really love to know like...what any of these are. Is knowledge just like infinite knowledge of pain? Is life just like eternal suffering? Wtf does resurrection do?

B: Who knows but if you have the final configuration the cenobites are like - what you want fam? And you're like uh....McDonalds. What if the guy...he...like..uh...

M: You good?

B: I was trying to come up with a joke. Riley was like - hey maybe the box can resurrect Matt - and Colin should have been like - wait, Matt's dead? Nora is trapped in the creepy secret tunnel and Taylor is like wtf. Nora's just like - hey just flip those random switches until it opens up again.

M: Again with the really good decisions. Riley has LOST THE BOX. That's probably bad. Someone else has it. It's Veidt. I meant Voight. He stabs Nora in the back with the box, and again I have some questions about how this box thing works. Who is it working for? Voight? Riley?

B: I think it's just working. I don't think it cares who gets stabbed and who's doing the stabbing, it's just like BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD. Everyone is like Nora are you okay and she's like NO I GOT STABBED. Colin pulls it out and now she's bleeding profusely because that's what happens.

M: Nora is like - there's a man in the walls btw, but they gotta get her to the hopstita. Riley of course, grabs the box. Because i'm sure it'll be helpful. Everyone piles into Tate's van and they get going. But not really. Because portals are opening behind and in front of them and suddenly the road is going nowhere because that's how Hell do.

B: They don't know where they're going, or they do but it doesn't matter. Meanwhile, Nora is fucking dying.

M: I love this elongated shot effect to show that the doors to the other realm or whatever are opening. It's very effective for an old trick. Nora is suddenly very alone and not in the van. Oh and there's cenobites. MY BOY.

B: Lookit this dude. It's the teeth chattering guy from Hellraiser. The most overrated cenobite ever.

M: You're gonna get some hate for that.

B: He's overrated as fuck. They had to put him in like every movie. But also, the other cenobite everyone knows. That one with the pins in their head.

M: Excuse you, her name is HELL PRIEST. Also she is cool as fuck. She looks amazing. Girl, your glow up. I really enjoy the changes, they're much like the book versions. Pinhead is playing this girl's throat like an instrument by sticking her head pins in there and making Nora scream, which is really fucked up and also very cool.

B: Oh yeah, blood, and then Pinhead looks directly at Riley in the mirror and then Nora's entire back falls off, all of it, just blech. And now Nora's gone, she exploded into blood in the back of the van. How you gonna explain this to the police??? Why is all her blood in the back of your car? Uh...we don't know.

M: Riley blames herself but Ted is like, listen this is not the most pressing issue right now. Maybe we should go back to the house, because otherwise it's the wilderness or the endless road. Colin and Terrance are getting into an argument while Riley just runs off and is like HEY FUCK THIS BOX I'M GONNA THROW IT.

B: Pinhead's like, no don't. Also have you given any thought to resurrecting your brother? Who we killed. Because we could do that.

M: Just kill two more people and we'll totally give your brother back, it's cool. But Riley is like no that's bad so Pinhead makes the box stab her so now she's gotta or she's gonna go to hell.

B: Sacrifice some more bitches or it's you! We're super short on bitches down here. Not enough motherfuckers. Also you've got two homies left right here!

M: I do feel for Colin, he really just like got dragged into all this shit and now everyone is dead and Riley might be coming to kill him. Also the earth just opened up and the 10 foot tall Chattery boy is now after them so they HAVE to run to the mansion and Colin is busy failing his wisdom save.

He’s one hell of a unit.

B: Meanwhile the chatterer dude is pinning Tanner and Riley behind a gate and Riley is like, well I could kill Tanner but she stabs the chatterer instead.

M: I love Pinhead's tiny tiny malicious smile there. This surprised the hell out of me. So it's goodbye chatterer because apparently it really doesn't matter who you are as long as you get stabbed. Meanwhile the box is assuming it's second to last form.

B: Colin is like WTF DO WE DO NOW. Also Tucker got his arm half bit off so he's kinda bleeding out all over now. Colin at least has the wherewithall to close the door.

M: The cenobites cannot pass through the magical bronze gate things in and around the fuck mansion for some reason. I don't know why, they're magical beings.

B: Magical anti cenobite properties. They tourniquet him to stop the bleeding, and we've talked at length about the dangers of those things. Riley conveniently finds very strong drugs right next to where Trent is bleeding to death but she's gonna let Colin hold on to them. Seems like it should be a Chekov's gun but it's not. MA THERE'S A WEIRD LOOKIN' CENOBITE OUTSIDE.

M: Blink, motherfucker. Some of them don't even have eyeballs, I mean....but they are just standing there....menacingly. Outside the mansion. Waiting for...something. Riley is gonna come up with a plan. Plans are neat.

B: Oh but here's the part where we get the plot twist, Travis was actually a BAD GUY! Voight is here and he's got some weird ass device going through him. Just straight through him.

M: On my first viewing, I was like that is hokey as FUCK but then we find out it's literally playing his nerves like a music box and that's honestly hardcore as hell.

B: All you had to do was follow the plan! You gotta do the box thing for reasons, Toby, you should have opened it yourself. The point here is that Theo was siding with the bad guy all along so now we can't root for him anymore.

M: He did kinda orchestrate this whole thing and put like, tons of people in danger and get a lot of people killed. Riley is just like - well it worked on Chatterer so we're just gonna stab more cenobites with it. But first we gotta figure out how to let only of them inside the mansion so we can stab it. Riley and Colin still don't know that Tyson is bad and he's sitting there on the floor bleeding to death.

B: I don't know why he's sitting on the floor, it's his arm that's injured. So they're literally just gonna open the front doors and Terry is gonna flip switches so they can let in just ONE cenobite. Colin's like - this is a bad idea, which probably, yeah, it is.

M: Riley's just gonna walk out there and be like psspsspss, come here cenobite. Come on! Just one of you tho! She tells Pinhead to take her and honestly, SAME. I am down. S tier forever.

B: Oh yeah this guy's arms just FUCKING OPEN UP, they just split in half. Nice, brutal, grody, I like it! But somehow only the gasping dying wheezing cenobite is coming inside.

M: Not at all sus.

B: They definitely don't know it's a trap. We'll just sacrifice this guy, nobody likes him anyway.

M: His breathy asthma noises are just keeping them all awake.

B: It seems very innocuous but then it suddenly breaks it's arms out of it's spine cage and takes off like a Romero zombie, but then it gets caught in the door and it's skin just PEELS OFF. This movie is nasty.

M: It so is and it's glorious. Also Riley dropped the fucking box outside of the door where the wheezing cenobite is caught all bleeding and gross so now Colin has to go get it but someone stabs him! It's Voight.

B: And suddenly Thaddeus is upset with him but Voight is like I don't fucking care. I like how he took the time to go put on a suit jacket. Get all dressed up for his meeting with Leviathan.

M: Riley is like WHAT THE FUCK, TRISTAN YOU USED US AND PEOPLE ARE DEAD and he's like - sorry.

B: Voight's gotta give us some exposition. What happened is obvious? It is NOT obvious, sir. He's like hey I'm rich and I've had like all the experience on the planet so I called up the cenobites and they were like hey so we're gonna put this device right through you to tear up your nerves for eternity.

M: He was seeking pleasure but he KNEW what the cenobites were so honestly...who's really at fault here.

B: You made a deal with the devil. After his entire monologue the configuration finally decided to change.

M: It was just being polite. Also, can I just say, maybe making ANOTHER deal with the devil isn't your brightest idea, eh?? Riley is screaming at Colin, who has been fucking stabbed, to get up and get going and Tyrone is like no stop.

B: All the blood coming out of the box and gravitates towards the weird Leviathan sunroof. I don't know why but it looks cool. Things running up always look cool.

Stuff running upwards always looks sick: known fact.

M: Meanwhile, actual Leviathan is descending on the fuck mansion, and Colin is running away.

B: Go back to your room young man and wait for the cenobites. I don't know what's going on with this mask guy. He doesn't have a head! This other cenobite shows up for like one scene, what's up with that?

M: Pinhead is like, well...guess it's time to go in now. Door's open, oh wait. No it's not.

B: Mister fucking bad guy closed the doors, and cenobites are like vampires apparently, you gotta invite them inside. And Voight is like pretty patties turned my face purple! Also I'm gonna try and hold the cenobites hostage.

M: Seems like a solid plan. Also yelling and cursing at them.

B: Riley manages to squeeze through the gate the wheezing cenobite is stuck in so it must not be closed that hard and she's got the box and she opens the doors which is bad for Voight but also Colin.

M: Exit stage left, pursued by cenobite. The gasp is now here and she's like well I have to kill you because you got stabbed by the box, no hard feelings.

B: She wraps some wire all around him that digs into his flesh, Riley hears him screaming and she's like no don't kill Colin!

M: Voight is trying to bargain with Pinhead to take the nerve device out of him but Pinhead is like, yeah nah. We worked hard on that thing.

B: Cenobites don't accept returns, but they do accept exchanges. No store credit. Like Gamestop, but Fleshstop. This scene has weirdly erotic undertones. Maybe overtones.

M: I don't think they're undertones at all. I think it's pretty intentionally erotic. One of the things I like about this Pinhead, she comes across as little bit more weirdly sexual.

Bark bark bark woof woof... respectfully

B: Riley is like well I gotta stab Tex to save Colin, and she does. Meanwhile Voight is having his device removed. He's throwing up blood and metal bits.

M: It's honestly hardcore. He's got a whole...hole through him but they magically knit him back together and it's a neat effect. It looks practical. Pinhead is like hey about that wish......and a gigantic chain comes down through the sunroof and impales him.

B: Meanwhile fuckin' Trombone is getting kind of flayed alive by the gasp cenobite but he was sus so it's okay.

M: It's no less than he deserves. Voight is getting pulled into the hellosphere and Pinhead finally says the iconic line. I would've loved to see more of the weird leviathan shit. Or just see the milkman show up but nobody's gonna get that reference unless they read the comics.

B: Read the manga, you fool. Riley and Colin are just...gonna leave I guess. Now that my horrific incident of terror is over, how about some breakfast?

M: Oh nah she's got a wish now too because she murdered her boyfriend.

B: I think it's like a bit of genie situation. Bit of a monkey's paw.

M: Ya think??

B: She sees her dead brother again.

M: After everything she's seen tonight, she's gotta be like nah. Just nah. And she does. And Pinhead is like well, your choice. Now you gotta live with the consquences of your actions!

The council will decide your fate.

B: You have selected casual bongos.

M: If I had to listen to casual bongos for eternity that might be hell. So Riley's punishment is just to go on living and be riddled with guilt and feel bad. Which is honestly kind of brutal. Reality is the harshest punishment. Way worse than being flayed alive for an eternity.

B: Riley and Colin do the morning after walk out of the mansion and Colin is like wtf just happened and she's like I made a choice and he's like NO I MEAN LIKE WITH ALL THE FUCKING FLESH MONSTERS AND SHIT HELLO?!?

M: He doesn't really but he should have. And now we see Voight and his penis all sacriligiously laid out inside what I assume is Leviathan getting his skin pulled off and all fucked up because apparently power means you're a cenobite now. I guess it beats the alternative? And Leviathan is just a big glittery diamond thing from inside.

B: His eyes turn into cenobite eyes.

M: Little bit of blasphemy but it's a very cool look. And the movie is over! Yay! I hope they make more. I want to know what some of this other shit does, yo. I want more fucked up flayed cenobites.

B: I want more...Pinhead. More of Jamie Clayton as pinhead. I'm gay but like....it's just an androgynous hell creature, it's fine.

M: Yes. I love that they didn't try to fucking emulate Doug Bradley and just let her do her own thang. It's very similar type of thing, very serious but also a little fucked up.

B: Her appearance is much more similar to the book versions.

M: It's wonderful.

B: I went into this movie thinking, when I saw Pinhead and I saw that they cast a woman as Pinhead, I thought maybe they were going back to the Kirsty Cotton lore but it didn't work out that way. It would've been kinda cool.

M: I actually wish they would've used some of that shit for the movies, ever, where Kirsty and Pinhead have this epic showdown and she becomes the Hell Priest. But instead we got detectives.

B: No detectives in this movie, 10/10. I am interested to see what the other gifts are from the configuration. I wanna see what cenobites think love is. It's not a perfect movie, but compared to some of the other Hellraiser movies, this shit is TOP TIER.

M: It's gory, it's got some twists that I didn't even see coming, it's fun and sexy and I loved it. I do think the cenobites were a wee bit overdone, but I like that they were clothed in flesh and so much of it looked practical. I like the scarification thing and I like the pieces of the lament kind of showed up in their designs.

B: I was kinda sad that they didn't bring back my boy butterball. Gasp was kind of based on the female cenobite but still.

M: That wheezing cenobite tho, ugh. It takes a lot to unnerve me but that thing did it. Still, 10/10, totally fucks.

B: Nonbinary Pinhead can get it.

M: It is here for the taking, baby. I'm gonna end this before it devolves into just us talking about how much we would bang the new Pinhead.

B: They horny for this one!

M: Munch and Biscuits out, yo.

[mab1905]

@bzedan here’s your Frenchie playlist! He hasn’t had any major plot lines so I pretty much just went off of vibes. Hope you enjoy!

Spotify Link

[pikaflute]

hi, sudafed cleared my sinuses long enough to think so here’s a giant post about most of my charles headcanons

Playlist

OH btw here’s my 4 hour and 23 minute playlist for Charles. Enjoy. Yes I know I’m insane: https://open.spotify.com/user/pikaflute24/playlist/4DBxaaxbqsmJt9Fvl8AgwZ?si=OcXlYCdFRzOhuKa4p_HdUQ

General Headcanons

He was born November 24 1965. He’s currently 56, but I usually write him in his late 40s in most fanfic and content I make. So there’s this middle aged man....

He has hazel eyes. Sometimes they look green, sometimes brown. Sometimes they’ll be white but that’s when he’s using his magic so mind your business

Gear brand over his heart >:)c

:) i think he has piercings and tattoos, a skull (dead man teehee) on his upper arm, a tattoo of a date (the date pickles and him first met TEEHEE) on his left arm also has a tattoo on his arm of the day he “died” on his right. had his ears pierced when he was a teen.

Has a sweet tooth so hard. Smuggles in treats into the drawers of his desk just to snack on during the day and has a mini fridge just filled with ice cream and also sorts of other goodies. He loves brownies and cookies the most

Likes to work out and keep himself in shape. it takes his mind off of stressful things like work and the boys, and just take his morning practice sparring and doing various exercises in the mordhaus gym. 

he’s uh also very flexible so he does yoga a lot when he exercises. don’t. look too deep into that

cannot cook to save his life. he almost burned mordhaus down trying to make himself a sandwich

he can play guitar! he used to play it more often when he was younger but he rarely has the time to play it nowadays. when he does get to play it, it’s usually in private (and mainly songs by dethklok), or it’s to show off to a certain lead guitarist that yes he is playing that solo wrong

he’s ambidextrous but prefers using his right hand. he’ll use his left hand to spar in order to go easy on his opponents because hes a smug cunt

he’s 5′7 but intimidation factor adds a couple inches doesn’t it

has a scorpion named princess as a pet. he lets her sit on his desk sometimes and it scares the shit out of dethklok which makes charles laugh on the inside

hes also a cat person. one time toki brought a cat home and it settled on charles�� lap and he almost cried

loves to be a smug asshole and relishes in it. will not take shit from anyone, especially from some asshole who is trying to pull one over on him

he has no idea how social media works at all. will print memes out to show to dethklok, he’s very fond of cat memes specifically (i can has cheeseburger type beat)

he has no idea what any internet memes means he isn’t going to start learning. he is going to misuse internet phrases. are you boys, ah, finding the imposter? [cue five groans from dethklok]

knows a lot of languages. not a comprehensive list but: french, swedish, norwegian, spanish, italian, japanese, chinese, german, russian and korean

is very competitive. scarily competitive. once he starts losing in smash or mario kart all hell will break lose

very bad at showing emotions or affection, when he gets compliments he gets all red and quiet and mumbles a thank you. 

weird about being touched as well and will usually avoid it unless it’s with someone he trusts

speaking of, his love language is acts of service :)c

hates being called charlie or chuck, unless the right person calls him it ;)

he’s autistic. was nonverbal for most of his life and only talked to certain people, or anyone at all. he stims with his hands and uses his pens to fidget.

has a collection of novelty socks. he likes the ones that have polka dots or stripes

sleeps with a garfield plushie he had since he was younger. it helps him with the nightmares

when any of the boys need help sleeping (usually toki or pickles), he’ll sleep with them in his bed. after dying he had trouble sleeping some nights, so dethklok returned the favor and all piled up in his bed and helped him sleep. he didnt have nightmares after that night

hes nearsighted, and prefers to wear glasses over contacts

lactose intolerant, hes still eating mac n cheese and paying the price

metalhead but pretends to not be just to mess with his boys

crippling addiction to match 3 games. also loves to play minecraft.

overly self sacrificial. puts ones he love needs before his own, results in himself being very isolated and distant from those he cares about because he’s afraid of hurting them

his favorite colors are black and purple

coffee kinda guy. black coffee or bust

has a lot of cute novelty mugs to put his coffee in. he ones from places where dethklok tours, dethklok official ones (the only two that aren’t adorned with spikes), some cat themed ones, a couple that have ties and math references, and one from his boys that says “most brutal manager”. he drinks out of that last one the most

he has a couple of grey hairs and wrinkles, but he keeps them because they remind him that he’s human. also pickles said old men were hot but you didnt hear that from me

likes to play chess but he can never find a good opponent. all the klokateers are too scared if they win and dethklok is too distracted to ever play with him or they end up losing to quickly if charles plays against them

really wants kids. he babies his sister’s sons and daughters a TON (uncle charles always brings the best gifts :) ) and also treats toki like his own son in a way. toki doesnt mind, he really appreciates the love

speaking of, toki does call charles dad once and it makes charles cry for like. a week and a half

his favorite dethklok song is the gears :)

he likes to collect knives as a side hobby, his favorite of his collection is a sleek black one with skulls on the handle

he has a motorcycle and likes to drive it around sometimes to just be alone with himself. it’s all black with a red gear on it

lightweight but only if he drinks the amount dethklok drinks. can hold his alcohol fairly well if he drinks like a sensible human, prefers brandy and wine

he can smoke cigars to be sexy for me and me ONLY

likes to read in his spare time. he likes mystery novels and science fiction

he has soft spot for cheesy sitcoms, they’re his guilty pleasure

his favorite youtuber is lockpickinglawyer. yours should be too

usually sleeps in only his boxers but will wear a shirt if its’s cold. he tends to sleep on his side (also wants to be the little spoon when cuddled but he will never admit that)

takes vacations sometimes away from the boys despite his worry that something will go wrong (it will!). many of his vacations are usually going to visit his family and going to the shore with them, or travelling to somewhere new for a change (cue charles being a yakuza substory on his one vacation per year)

he can sew pretty well. learned from his mom and used to sew the whole his sister use to put through her soccer uniform.

can also do makeup, and usually does it for one of the boys of there’s no one else around to help

bites his lip when he’s nervous. which is a lot

likes chococat and gudetama. he’s a man of tastes

laughs really loud if you catch him off guard. he snorts sometimes too. he’s embarrassed by it, but i think its’ cute

loves law and order obviously 

he likes men

has a lot of pent up rage. very good at compressing it. sometimes

as high priest, he stays up very late trying to decipher the ancient prophecies that dethklok needed to fulfill. he doesnt sleep very much when he starts out because he misses home, so the band makes him come back (or else)

also as high priest he becomes more intune with magic granted to him after he died and he mainly uses his magic to protect his boys when they go back to being a band. also to fuck with them

the band he managed before dethklok was a band named savior who said they were a metal band with a unique sound, but that unique sound was actually just being a christian metal band that were bad at playing music. they also treated charles like shit and blamed him for them doing so poorly with sales and shows. had an unfortunate “accident” with a tour bus after charles had enough of their attitude towards him.  he denies he had anything to do with it (he did.)

Family/Childhood

He’s the baby of the family. Spoiled rotten to the max. He doesn’t admit it though but whenever he comes home you know he abuses the “:)c im the favorite” card

He has 4 older sisters: Caroline who is a high school civics teacher, Cynthia who is a librarian, Callie who is a coach for a soccer team, and Charlotte who is a lawyer/manager who manages Ladyklok, which gets awkward (and funny) when Abigail starts dating the lead singer Natalie

charles is actually one of the tallest in his family. his dad is 6’1 and his older sister Callie is 5’11. cynthia is 5’6, caroline is 5’6, and his mom and charlotte are 5’5.

his mom is a doctor and his dad is an accountant. his mom’s name is giovanna and his dad’s name is elijah

caroline is the oldest sister, followed by cynthia, callie, charlotte then charles.

Charlotte and Charles are sworn enemies since they were born on the same day a year apart and basically have the same job. They do love each other though

His father calls him Charles. Caroline and Cynthia call him Charlie. Callie calls him Chuck. Charlotte calls him Charles (derogatory). His mom calls him a whole slew of nicknames that she made up when he was young (she calls him cheese ball and he turns red)

caroline has a wife (lauren who is a chef) and two kids (evan and shelby)

cynthia is dating a coworker (viola)

callie has a husband (john who is a stay at home dad) and they have three kids (brenda, melissa, and jeff)

charlotte is dating ladyklok (and abigail). this is a weird flex on charles i think.

He had a race car bed when he was like 5

He also was also one of those kids at family game night. He almost killed Cynthia over a game of monopoly

Always got to lick the spoon first after his mom baked brownies

He grew up in North Jersey (derogatory) (also yes im projecting state shot)

He’s also Italian (derogatory)

He got bullied in middle school for a little bit but once his older sisters found out, oh boy did all hell break loose

Was in band in high school. He played flute (DONT TALK TO ME I LIKE PROJECTING), he was of course a soloist and incredibly smug about it

Took gymnastics as a kid. Can do a backflip on command. Also very flexible.

First manager gig was helping his sisters sell girl scout cookies. They raked in a lot of profits when baby bro was behind the scenes. His cut was eating thin mints for free

Loved Star Trek when he was a kid

Was incredibly gifted, and taught himself to read at a young age. didn’t talk that much though

was always sick when he was little. he would always get sinus infections and colds if someone even sneezed weird

was in mock trial in high school. one guy on his team was a jerk to him so charles made it a point to be this poor kid’s nemesis

was on the student council, treasurer of course.

was also in nhs, and he was treasurer there too

was that kid who insisted on doing the group project by himself because he didn’t want to wait on anyone to finish their part

was super rowdy as a kid, always got into trouble but his mom was a little lenient of punishment (hes a mommas boy)

when he was like super young he bit people cause he was just a little monster (charles' sisters: mom charles is biting again. charles, biting one of them: im not :/ sheesh)

wanted to be a lawyer since he was 7

put his own siblings and parents on trial and would win every trial and would always get the last cookie or a higher allowance

he shared his room with his sister Charlotte and they would set up a pillow fort on one of the beds and stay up late reading together 

loved going to the beach as a kid, his mom still has his collection of shells from the beach

on the boardwalk, he would dominate at claw machines anad carnival games. he won a bunch of plushies from himself (and his sisters obviously)

his dad and him have a super close bond. they watched star trek together and also like to watch how the stock market would do. his dad was also sometimes the judge in charles’ mock trials at home

they were very supportive when he came out as gay, he was also the first of his sibilings to come out of the closet

College

Got his masters in business management at rutgers and a JD (law degree) from seton hall law.

Started college when he was 18 (1983) and ended college when he was 26 (1991)

Wasn’t a party guy. Never got invited to many, but he never went unless a certain redhead was in town

Sustained himself off of ramen, coffee, and SSRIs to get his masters (hey man i feel ya)

Did weed like three times. Three of those times were because of, you guessed it, a certain redhead

Speaking of, his first time having sex was in his dorm with Pickles. Pickles also kicked him off of the bed (those beds are fucking tiny) while they slept, and almost burned Charles’ dorm down trying to make toast the next morning

Absolute did not do essays until the night before. Bad habit that made it’s way into Dethklok managing when he’s forced to write a legal brief before 12 am.

Loved calculus 2 for some reason. Nerd

Had a mullet. Pickles thought it was hot (still is) while Charles would rather die than remember anything about that horrid hairdo

Also went through his goth/emo phase while in Law School. He stuck out amongst the sea of sweater vests and polo shirts

Was in a band with his fellow college bandmates. The band was called Habeas Corpses and he was the lead singer who also played guitar. Their sound was kind of similar to TWRP’s first two EPs (The Device and 2nite). they had a grunge aesthetic, and yes charles dyed his mullet black (with a purple streak), for the band.

his bandmates were all fellow law students. dillan was on drums, margaret was their bass guitar, and nick was their keyboardist. all three of them also got tutored by charles while in law school. they are still best friends and write to each other sometimes

Was on the debate team, but uh kicked off due to be very competitive (he threatened to punch the opposing debater)

Was also in the chess club, also kicked off for being too competitive (lunged at a kid for cheating)

After being kicked from the two previous clubs, he joined fencing, his very competitive nature made him the best in the state

nick (the guy in charles’ band) was charles’ roommate the whole time they were in college. they may or may not have had a brief relationship before they realized they would be better as friends

nick also has a nes and charles loved to played zelda and wrote an entire guide for himself because he’s was that into the game (nerd)

occasionally would be found sleeping in the library on campus

wanted to be an RA but the resident association at his schools thought he was a little much. charles took this as a compliment

worked out a lot between studying and classes. a lot of jocks underestimated him because of his size but charles was just :) [casually lifts something heavy]

a lot of fellow classmates thought he was super cool cause of the leather he wore, and how cool and quiet he was, too bad they didnt know he was a huge nerd

tried skateboarding. once.

had a cadillac that barely started and drove like a piece of shit but that was charles’ baby

pickles tried to have sex with charles in said car btw, charles almost killed him for even daring to suggest to tarnish his beautiful baby

has damaged his back permanently because of all the books he used to carry around in his crappy back pack

did some modelling for one of his friends in college. he was very attractive and got some other modelling job through it. he tries to hide that from the boys in the future because he thinks it’s embarrassing

Relationship with Dethklok

Pickles - he’s known the drummer the longest out of any other member, and if you couldn’t tell by now, he had a brief relationship with the drummer back in the 80s (and maybe also still has a crush on him :)). charles respects and admires pickles’ talent as a musician and sometimes they play together when they have time alone. he tries to be there when pickles has a relapse in either emotions with his family or something else, but still tries to maintain a distance because he thinks that pickles doesn’t feel the same as he did in the 80s. (he does btw). nothing could break the bond these two share. not even death

Nathan - understands nathan’s quiet nature (nonverbal kings!) and strive for perfection in everything dethklok creates because he is the same way. their similarities allow them to connect on a level that allows nathan to open up about his feelings that he likes to lock away. nathan also gets charles to open his feelings up and actually care for himself for once in his damn life. charles also helps nathan with the depression he develops after charles dies and how to deal with it despite it being not brutal. nathan wants to give back and he does by becoming one of charles’ closest friends (and maybe even lovers hehehe)

Toki - charles has taken it upon himself to be toki’s father figure after seeing the way toki’s family has left him for essentially dead. ever since toki joined the band, charles has made it a point to be there for him whenever he needed it. even if it meant spending late nights reading to toki or sleeping over in toki’s room to help him sleep, he’ll do it. he blames himself for toki’s disappearance but toki assures him that he did the best he could. toki calls him dad a lot after doomstar. it makes charles cry.

Skwisgaar - unstoppable asshole meets immovable object. skwisgaar sees himself above everyone else like he does with the other dethklok members but with charles, skwisgaar knows that charles isn’t intimidated by him nor will he bow to the guitar god in anyway. this develops a game of cat and mouse between the two, with skwisgaar trying to no subtly push charles’ buttons and to see what makes him ticks, while charles resist him at every turn with a smug ‘:) is that all you got’ and it delights him to finally see the guitarist squirm under pressure.

Murderface - at first the two are very. distant to say the least. murderface used to see charles as unemotional robot and charles was fine with that and accepted the distance. overtime however, and especially after charles died, murderface warmed up to charles confiding in him things he hasn’t told the band, mainly things about his insecurities because charles is ‘fucking smart with crap like this’. and charles helps him and is happy to see him work out his problems and not bottle them anymore like the rest of his bandmates. charles also enjoys murderface’s company as a friend as well. and….he’s gonna help murderface the most with the whole traitor stuff too.

Abigail - mlm and wlw hostility. but seriously they’re good buds. he sympathizes with having to deal the moronic actions of dethklok on a daily basis and also thinks she’s really intelligent and overall fun to hang out with. they take lunch breaks frequently together and like to make fun of people at dethklok dinners together as a fun activity together. abigail will bully his ass once she finds out she’s dating charles’ sister and WILL bring up those baby pictures to get a higher raise thank you very much

Knubbler - can you say coworker besties! like abigail, he gets along because they both have to deal with dethklok being, well dethklok, but with knubbler, charles can relax a little more. the two cause problems on purpose just because they can. the two are also close friends and knubbler tries to get charles to relax for once in his life, and despite charles protests and objections, he sometimes caves and hands out with his friend (maybe boyfriend OOOOO who knows)

Sex Headcanons (IM SORRY)

um maybe he can have a giant dick (10 inches for me), it do be swinging though

daddy kink (everyone stay on this side, ill take care of him….come to daddy ;)c)

likes to do roleplay. he has a lot of costumes prepared for when his partner wants to do a scene with him

likes to bite and be bitten during sex. after a very long night, he’ll be covered in bite marks, it’s kinda hot

no gag reflex ;) he likes to deepthroat but good luck trying to get him to go down on you without him teasing

remember how i said he was flexible like eight times? yeah he uh, uses that a lot to his advantage. likes being fucked in weird positions because of it

the suit stays on during sex

he likes topping because he likes to be in control of everything he does all the time, but really wants to be told what to do sometimes and will let those he trusts do that for him

he has a dick piercing i know it

he's a very busy man, so he relies on his huge collection of toys he keeps in his bedroom and office

really good with his hands. as soon as those hands are on you, its game over

he loves to do it on his desk, makes him feel powerful. when he gets blown under his desk, it really takes all of his willpower to not cum immediately

really sensitive in weird places, specifically his ears

he likes to cuddle after sex, hes the little spoon :)

likes to be tied up, sometimes he’ll get tied up under his suit

mating press and riding are his favorite positions, giving and receiving

size queen, likes large toys and well ;)

has a private room that he sometimes goes to relieve stress, it has a fucking machine that he likes to use often when his job gets too stressful

he’s sucking people off at the klokateer glory hole, he’s uh, very good at what he does

likes to be spanked and like to spank

uses collars and leashes

maybe the klokateers can fuck him, if they’re good ;)

freeballing

likes cum on his face but doesn't seem to realize that means he’ll get cum on his glasses and will need to clean them

he can wear a chastity belt :) for me

likes being came in but will still complain about being gross after

pretty much up for anything, he’s not picky, he just wants to be in control and get off

[katehuntington]

Title: Ride With Me (part thirteen) Fandom: Supernatural AU Characters series: Reader, Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer, Ellen Singer-Harvelle, Jo Singer (Harvelle), Benny Lafitte, Garth Fitzgerald IV, Ash Miller, Castiel Novek, and many more. Timeline: 2008 Pairing: Dean x Reader Word count: ±6350 words Summary series: Y/N is a talented horse rider who is on her way to become a professional. In order to convince her father that she deserves the loan needed to start her own farm, she goes to Arizona for six months, to intern at a ranch owned by Bobby and Ellen Singer. Her future is set out, but then she meets a handsome horseman, who goes by the name of Dean Winchester. A heartwarming series about a cowboy who falls for the girl, letting go of the past and the importance of family.  Summary part thirteen: The six mile ride to find water is a long one, exhausting the wranglers. When they finally reach the river, Dean and Y/N find a lot more than just that. Warnings series: NSFW, 18+ only! Fluff, angst, eventually smut. Swearing, smoking, alcohol intoxication, alcohol abuse. Mutual pining, heartbreak. Crying, nightmares, childhood trauma. Description of animal abuse, domestic violence, mentions of addiction. Financial problems, stress, mental breakdown. Description of blood and injury, hospital scenes, character death, grief. Music: ‘I Will Carry You’ - Carter Burwell (opening scene), ‘All The Wild Horses’ - Ray LaMontagne (Dean & Y/N final scene). Check out ‘Kate Huntington’s Ride With Me playlist’ on Spotify! Author’s note: Thank you @kittenofdoomage and @girl-with-a-fandom-fettishfor helping me. You girls are awesome betas. Thank you for your endless patience! 

Ride With Me Masterlist

     “Here.”      A water flask moves into her peripheral vision, pulling Y/N back from a hazy daydream. It’s past five PM, but it’s at least 90 degrees, the high temperatures lingering. The heat is dry, not the kind that is oppressive and makes it hard to breathe, but more torrid. Crippling nonetheless, especially for someone who is used to chilly autumns and cold winters. Her fatigued body was aching when they were standing at the junction hours ago, but Y/N didn’t want to be the one to call it quits. She still feels the pressure to prove herself, to her dad, to Dean and Bobby, to herself. So she kept her mouth shut. Now it seems stupid, because she isn’t feeling well. 

     Heavy eyes glide up the arm extended to her, meeting Dean’s handsome face, shaded by his Western hat. It’s clear that he’s concerned for her.      “That’s yours,” she objects. “I’ve got some left.”      “No, you don’t. You emptied it over an hour ago,” he knows, motioning her to take the bottle.      Y/N huffs; looks like someone has been keeping an eye on her. Dean isn’t going to take no for an answer.      “You gotta to stay hydrated, or this heat will take you down,” the wrangler pressures. “You’re not used to these circumstances.”      “I’ve been here for over a month, Dean. I think I’m used to the climate by now,” she counters stubborn, even though she knows better.      The cowboy eyes her sternly, but can’t stop the corner of his mouth from twitching in a smile. Hardheaded? Y/N? Where did he ever get that idea?      “Are you gonna drink it, or what?” he half asks, half tells her.      Reluctant the cowgirl takes the water, but hesitates before she lifts it to her mouth.      “What about you?”      “I’m alright,” he assures.      Before she has a sip, Y/N takes in the cowboy. Dust has covered his arms and his neck with a thin layer, the tiny particles sticking to his sweaty skin. His bandaged hand rests on the horn of the saddle, but other than the minor injury, nothing indicates that the long journey in extreme conditions is getting to him. He must be thirsty too, but he looks alert and healthy, which she surely does not.

     Y/N quickly counts the number of hours she has been in the saddle; close to eleven. The long trail under the merciless sun is taking its toll. Dean knows it, even Joplin does, because the mare has reduced her pace significantly, getting her cargo safely across the land, while before she was hard to keep up with. Her rider is glad she slowed down and took the wheel, because she is not in the mood to repeatedly ask the dark little horse to ease. Every now and then, Y/N feels like she could faint, a wave of dizziness almost washing the female wrangler off her horse. Gosh, she wishes it was actual waves. She would do anything for a drop of rain right now. For a second she fantasizes about a nice bubble bath, or a shower even. She would do anything for a cool shower.

     She swallows down the water, leaving some for the wrangler next to her. With worry puckered on his forehead, he observes her intently. It doesn’t go unnoticed, because a scoff erupts from her sore throat.      “I’m fine,” she assures him. “I’m just tired and a little sore, that’s all.”      But Dean isn’t convinced. Pondering he glances ahead, watching Benny and the other three riders. His Southern friend is making easy conversation and it seems like Macy and Brad are handling themselves, but Jon looks like he’s going on fumes.       “We should’ve gone back,” he mumbles, second guessing his decision.      “What? And return to the ranch without the horses?” she queries, resting her free hand on her thigh. “We had to make the jump, Dean. Rather on the second day than later. Plus, you said it yourself: find the water, find the herd.”      Ted’s rider looks aside, the muscles of his jaw tensing as he averts his eyes again. He did tell her that, but he has trouble trusting his own words. Running low on water could have disastrous consequences in the desert. Having enough of it while on a trail is one of the first essentials. What if they get stranded? What if one of the horses suffers a more severe injury than Cash already did?      

     “How much longer?”      Y/N didn’t mean the words to come out pleading, but when Dean returns her gaze sympathetically, she realizes how desperate she sounded. He then glances at the volcanic landscape around him, determining their position. With Battleship Mountain on his left and the entrance of Boulder Canyon straight up ahead, it can’t be more than a mile.      “We’re almost there,” he reassures her. “I promise.”      She nods, but her smile isn’t sincere. Everything other than ‘we’ll be there in five minutes’ is too long. Dean seems to be able to read her mind, however.      “We can go for a swim once we get there,” he adds.      Now Y/N does look up, her interest peaked.      “A swim?”      “Hm-hm. Where we’re headin’ isn’t just a little stream. There is water there the whole year round. So if you want, we can go for a swim.” He smiles at her.      God, that sounds heavenly. She looks forward to it already, although a question rises almost instantly. She can’t go swimming in her jeans, so that means the cowboy is going to see her, all of her. Insecure she smiles back at him, trying not to let her self-consciousness stand in the way.      “Don’t wait up for me; if you want to lead the group, go ahead. I’ll catch up.” She changes the subject, nodding at the six horses about forty yards up front.      He shrugs, shaking his head lightly and dismissing her suggestion.       “Benny will manage. I’d rather be riding next to you.” 

     And so he stays by her side as they descend into the narrow canyon, the trail getting steep. She lets Joplin choose the path, trusting the agile horse with bringing her down the slope. They drop several hundred feet in a short amount of time, Dean on her tail the entire time, making sure she will arrive at the river safely. Then the path evens out, a plateau hanging over a cliff seems to be the end of the line. The other wranglers halt at the edge, the moral lifting at the sight. Curious Y/N rides up to join them, when she spots it. In the middle of the dramatic landscape with intimidating rock formations, which cast long shadows over the land as the sun hangs low in the west, an oasis of green frames the riverbed. Crystal clear water runs through the La Barge Creek into Canyon Lake. Salt River snakes through the landscape to their east. They made it. They finally made it. After a long and stressful day in the saddle, they can finally recharge.      “Boys and girls, welcome to Eagle’s Nest,” Benny announces, a wide grin on his face.

     Y/N lets a deep sigh slip from her lips, just the image before her having her feel a little bit lighter already. She smiles at Dean, who mimics her expression, clearly relieved that it all worked out. The head wrangler is the first one to ride down the hill, the rest of the company in his wake. About a hundred yards from the water he stops Ted.      “Set up camp here?” Benny assumes.      Dean nods. “Let’s make it quick, before we run out of light.”      He dismounts his horse, slightly stiffer than he did yesterday; even the experienced trail rider is feeling this one deep in his muscles. Y/N does the same and she lands on the rocky surface with a thud, her feet tingling. Walking seems almost foreign, the first few steps a little unsteady, a sensation similar to having sea legs. Her supervisor hands her Ted.      “You can take the horses to drink first,” he lets his eyes glide from Y/N to Macy and Jon, who looks like he is in no shape to help set up camp. The women nod and get to it, taking over the other horses as well, figuring the sooner the evening chores are done, the sooner they can put their feet up. 

     All eight horses eagerly walk further down the slope and step into the creek while putting their lips to the surface. Joplin almost drains the lake, her ears ticking forward with each gulp. Y/N chuckles at her eagerness, as she takes her flask from her saddlebag and fills it up. Jon throws water into his face, a delighted sigh escaping him as he freshens up, Macy following his example.       “I’ve never appreciated water so much,” he claims. “I will never take it for granted again.”      “You and the water need a room?” Macy nags, splashing water at her friend, who returns the favor.       Y/N watches them banter, taking a long swig from her bottle, emptying almost three quarters in one go. The cold water runs down her throat and for a moment she feels a little uneasy, but then the fluid settles in her stomach. God, she was thirsty. Maybe even dehydrated, in combination with the relentless heat. But after a few more sips, she feels a lot better. Refilling her flask again, she straightens her back, looking up at the plateau where Dean, Benny and Brad are setting up the tents in record time. She walks around Joplin to the head wrangler’s horse, taking his bottle and filling it up as well. Having done the same for the other two wranglers, she takes Joplin and Ted to the camp, giving out water.

     “You’re a frickin’ lifesaver. Thanks, darlin’,” Benny compliments, taking his bottle gladly. After handing Brad’s flask back, she walks up to Dean, who is setting up a paddock for the horses. He doesn’t notice her until she’s right behind him; without thinking about it, she lays her hand on his strong biceps to get his attention. The wrangler turns around surprised, meeting her soft smile. She holds the water bottle up, his eyes bouncing from her to the refreshment, looking at it with the same want. Gratefully he takes the flask, his fingers brushing over hers in the exchange, before he twists the cap off and takes three, four, five swigs. He lets a contented ‘ahh’ slip from his lips, breathing out relieved. Y/N tries not to stare, but it’s like she’s under hypnosis. Those same lips were on hers last night, and she has to admit she wants that again. She needs to retain herself, though, because Brad and Benny are setting up the third tent next to them.

     Dean lowers the bottle, catching her slightly lowered jaw and hungry eyes. He smirks, his emerald greens twinkling as he wets his dry lips. Then he tucks his chin down, looking deep into her eyes while his darken a little. It seems like it’s only then that she realizes she is gaping and the blood rushes to her face. She breaks eye contact, smiling at her feet sheepishly. Oh, he knows exactly what he is doing.       After gathering her confidence, she looks up to meet his gaze, the playful smirk back on his lips. Something in the air has changed. The nerves have dissolved, together with the doubt. There is no question if they both feel attracted to each other, but rather when the pull between them grows too strong to resist. The silent moment of sexual tension lasts a couple of solid seconds, before Dean is called over by Brad to help him out. As he walks past Y/N, he holds her gaze and lets his fingertips brush her forearm. It leaves her skin sensitive, goosebumps running up, despite the fact that the temperature is nowhere near chilly.     

     Within ten minutes the camp is ready for occupation. The horses calmly chew on their hay and scavenge for grass and twigs in the makeshift paddock. Despite the long day, none of them are visibly tired. Not even Cash, who seems to have forgotten about the whole snake bite incident.       “Who wants to go swimmin’?”      Y/N puts down the last stone and closes the circle of the firepit, only looking up when she dusts off her hands. Benny has already shed his shirt, unzipping his pants now with no shame whatsoever. Stunned she stares at him, then quickly averts her eyes.       “Hell yes! I’ve been looking forward to diving into that creek ever since I laid eyes on it,” Jon muses, his appreciation for water still not faltering.

     The intern’s gaze lingers on Brad and Jon now; one kicking off his boots, the other unbuckling his belt. Even Macy follows without a second thought. The female guest notices Y/N’s hesitation, because she shrugs as she slips her denim jeans from her hips.      “No different than a bikini, right?” she comments carefree.       Macy has a point, it doesn’t ease Y/N’s nerves, though. Of course it’s not skinny dipping, but she still feels uncomfortable exposing so much skin. She glances at Dean, who leaves his hat on the corner pole of one of the tents. For a second she freezes as he unbuckles his belt, realizing there’s something else she hasn’t considered. Seeing Dean in nothing but his underwear might just be a bit too much for her to handle.            “Last one down takes the night’s watch!”      The broad shouldered farrier descends down the hill - only wearing his form fitting boxer briefs - with the guests in tow. Brad chases his sister, who squeals as she tries to stay out of reach, running into the water in her red bra and striped boy shorts. She doesn’t seem to care about how she looks. Y/N gulps as she watches her, wishing she had that kind of confidence.      “You comin’ or do you need my help undressin’?”      She jumps when she feels Dean’s hand on her hip and turns around. He stripped from his clothes, only wearing a pair of grey boxers. Dear Lord, he looks amazing. Last time she saw him shirtless, it was the morning of her first day on the job. He was freshly showered then, his hair fluffy. Now it is fixed with traces of gel, pushed up again when he ran his hand through it earlier, after his hat flattened the light brown strands. Dirt and dust have mixed with the sweat that the heat surfaced, adding to the tan lines on his arms and neck. She swallows with difficulty and tears her eyes from his toned chest up to his evergreen eyes.       The wrangler senses her discomfort, because he narrows his eyes at her slightly, the trademark smirk dying down. She knows that he was joking about the undressing part, right?     “You okay?” he checks.      “Yeah, yeah. I’m - I’m fine,” she assures, faking a smile. “I’ll be down in a minute.”      Dean holds her gaze for a second, trying to read her. Not sure if he made her feel uncomfortable, he lets his hand slip from her waist and decides against the quick kiss he was going to leave on her lips; he doesn’t want to push her. His expression is soft now, letting her know that it’s okay if she needs time.       “Alright,” he returns, leaving it at that.      He walks past her towards the water, the sounds of splashing and laughter welcoming him. Taking a deep breath, Y/N closes her eyes. She has to go down and join them and doing that clothed is both more conspicuous and impractical, since she’ll be wearing the same pair of jeans in the morning. Not taking a swim isn’t an option either, because this might be the only chance she gets to clean herself thoroughly, until they get back to the ranch. She has no choice, so why is she blowing this up in her mind? Why is she so self-conscious about her appearance? Because Jo told her once how Dean only goes for the pretty girls? Because she saw his former fling Casey, the beautiful brunette who could as well have been a model? Or is it because no one has ever looked at her like the head wrangler, and she doesn’t want him to see her differently after he witnesses all of her?

     Frustrated, she takes off her hat and pulls the hairband from her braid, strapping it around her wrist. Internally she scolds herself for letting the insecurity get to her, all the while she unbuttons her plaid blouse and shrugs it off hastily. Before she changes her mind, she takes off one boot, then the other, leaving them by her tent, neatly placed next to each other with her socks inside. Finally she pushes her jeans down, folding them up and placing them on top of her Western boots.       Again she inhales, because there she stands, in nothing but her black hipsters, a navy blue bra and a white tank top. Even though she had to pack light, she at least could have brought matching underwear. Not brave enough to take her undershirt off, she steps onto the path towards the water barefoot, running her fingers through her hair. The sight in front of her takes away some of her anxiety, because the wranglers, who were running low on moral an hour ago, are now enjoying their refreshing swim. Macy’s significant giggle echoes between the rocks at the river bed as Jon and Brad continue to tease her. Benny swims a slow lap, floating in the middle of the creek, while Dean washes his face in shallower waters. Thankfully, none of them are paying much attention as the intern approaches the waterline. 

     As she dips a toe in the water to test the temperature, Dean turns to look at her. His eyes shift from playful to mesmerized in a split second, because he has never seen her like this. For the first time since he met her, she’s wearing her hair down. The braid she left in for two days, leaves small waves in her locks, coming down like a waterfall. Her exposed legs haven’t seen much sun, due to her Northern origins, and probably her shyness as well. They seem strong, though, hours of horse riding and training leading to the muscles barely visibly moving under her soft skin, as she steps into the water.       He smiles at the sight of the young woman, who sweeps him off his feet every time he lays eyes on her. “There you are.”            She returns his expression, insecurity oozing through when she covers herself as much as she can. She has pulled her tank top down far enough to stretch over the little shorts she’s wearing. He is careful not to look at her differently, not wanting the self-conscious young woman to think that seeing her in less clothing changes his perspective, but deep down it hurts him. It hurts him that she apparently doesn’t feel like she’s beautiful, because God damn, she is.       “Just take the plunge, Yankee,” he encourages, letting himself fall back smoothly, the water up to his shoulders now.      “You know, for a place that is as hot as it is here, the water is pretty damn cold,” Y/N scoffs, collecting some of the water in her cupped hands and spreading it on her arms.      Dean chuckles at that. She said ‘damn’, it’s about as close to a curse that he’s heard from her.       “Once you’re in, it’s not so bad,” he promises. 

     Not having the heart to jump into the cool water, she puts one step into his direction, the surface at her knees now. This afternoon she would have committed a crime for a refreshing swim, but now that she is standing here, the cold licking at her ankles, she shivers. She still has her arms crossed, hugging herself in an attempt to feel warm and comforted. Movement of the water draws her attention and Y/N looks up at the head wrangler, who is moving towards her. Normally that wouldn’t strike her as alarming, but when she notices the mischievous grin adorning his handsome face, she holds her ground.      “W-what are you doing?” she stammers.      Dean doesn’t answer, but raises his eyebrows at her, fighting the fading resistance of the water with every stride. Oh boy, he is clearly up to no good. It causes her to step back and put out her hands in defense.      “No - no - no! Dean, don’t you dare!” she warns, once she understands where this is going.

     Y/N steps out of the creek now, trying to get away from him. But the cowboy is quick, and even when she sprints away, he manages to catch up. She lets out a scream when he grabs her by the waist, locking her to his chest with his strong arms. He then lifts her up without a strain and walks back to the creek. Not impressed with the fight she puts up as she tries to escape his grip, he steps into the cool water.      “Dean, put me down! Put me --”      Honoring her request, he jumps in, turning so that he is the first to dunk in the water and only then lets her go. They both go under, the cowboy coming up before her, shaking the water from his face. When Y/N breaks through the surface, he throws his head back while laughing out loud. The sheer horror on her face says it all; her mouth hanging open, her hair soaked and covering her eyes, her shoulders pulled up to her ears. She looks more like a cat who got dropped into the bath than a human being.

     She wants to be mad at him, but the sound of his laughter melts her stone cold limbs. With a scoff she pushes the tangled strands from her face, glaring at the cowboy as she bites down on her lip in order to not break character. But then she chuckles, shaking her head.      “You are such a jerk,” she utters.      “You were taking forever,” he returns sniggering.       Amused he watches her, moving a little closer. He’s about to apologize, when Y/N kicks her foot up, sending a big splash his way. He turns his head to avoid getting even wetter and counters with a good pitch, a handful of water sloshing at her as she protects her face. They continue to spatter like a bunch of kids, cackling as they do so, until Benny intervenes.

     “Children!” he calls out, finally getting his friend’s attention.      Both stop mid-action, glancing aside at the farrier who is watching the banter with his arms crossed and the water at his waist.      “Permission to get the diving boards, Chief?” he requests.      Dean nods, confirming, liking his Southern brother’s idea. Y/N studies him puzzled, however.      “We didn’t bring diving boards, did we?” she double checks, not sure what Benny is up to.      “Not the typical ones, no,” Dean returns mysteriously. “You’ll see.”

     Benny returns from the camp not even a minute later, a horse by the halter in each hand. Stunned Y/N watches how he leads Ted Nugent and his own horse Ozzy Osbourne towards the riverbed, the large animals stepping in trustingly. He hands Dean Ted as he passes by, guiding the other chestnut to the center of the creek. When the water reaches to Ozzy’s shoulder, Benny pulls himself on top of the calm horse. Clearly it isn’t the first time that the wranglers have done this, because even when the farrier stands up on the gelding’s back, Ozzy waits patiently.       “Bombs away!”

     With a loud cheer Benny jumps from the ‘platform’, pulling his knees to his chest and breaking the surface with an impressive cannonball dive. He sends a tidal wave over the tourists, who rally him on. They swim towards Ozzy, who seems to love the cool down plus the attention. One by one they climb on his back, diving from his strong hindquarters.      Dean watches the bunch with a contentment over him that Y/N hasn’t seen before. He leans against Ted, his arm resting over the arc of the horse’s spine. Of course this isn’t the first time she notices how relaxed he is, how at home he feels, and yet something is different about him. Like he reached a new level of happiness, of fulfillment. That couldn’t possibly have anything to do with her, now could it? But when he lets his eyes wander from the frolicking guests to Y/N, his smile grows wider, edging crow’s feet at the corner of his eyes.       “Wanna go for a ride?” he asks.      Without wasting words, she nods, holding his gaze until he takes Ted’s leadrope. Skillfully he swings his leg over the horse’s back, using the momentum to jump from the creek’s bottom and landing behind Ted’s withers. Once he’s seated, he extends his hand towards the woman beside him, grabbing her arm and interlocking it with his. With one swift pull he hoists her from the water, Y/N using the same technique to sway onto the horse, settling behind the head wrangler. As he steers Ted a little deeper into the water, his free hand comes to rest on Y/N’s thigh, not caring about the guests seeing them together. 

     The cowgirl’s balance on a horse is that of a gymnast on the beam, so holding on to Dean wouldn’t be necessary, but she puts her arms around his waist anyway. Comfortable and allowing herself to let this be, like he has encouraged her to, she rests her cheek against the hollow between his shoulder blades for a moment, closing her eyes. Her bare feet sweep through the water, her toes drawing ripples on the surface, the break catching the last light of the day. Despite that she is not holding the reins, bareback on a horse that she doesn’t know, she feels safe. She hasn’t felt this carefree since the early days of her horse riding career. Her grandfather would walk with her during those very first pony rides, teaching her about horses along the way. She trusted him fully, never once doubting his life lessons and knowledge. With Dean it’s a different kind of faith. It’s knowing he will be right there whenever she needs him, but also to give her the courage to take that leap.       “You alright back there, Yankee?” he wonders, feeling her smile against his skin.      “Yeah,” she acknowledges. “I am.”      The corner of Dean’s mouth pulls upward, his hand holding the leadrope shifting from Ted’s mane to cover her hands on his stomach, fingers entwining, trapping the braided cord in between. The rope made of horsehair scratches his palm, a contrast to her soft skin. Grateful he breathes in, the smell of desert dust underlaid with a subtle, herbal, organic scent of the river fills his nose.       Before, he never felt like he needed something more in life. He has never gone steady with a woman, not more than a couple of weeks at least. He was never looking for a relationship and appreciated the freedom that came with that. But now, having her pressed against his back, warm and comforting, he realizes what he’s been missing. 

     They approach the other wranglers, the rider exchanging a knowing look with Benny, who takes in the perfect picture delighted. Before the guests notice the intimacy, Y/N slips her arms from Dean’s strong torso, pulling up her feet.      “What are you doin’?” the cowboy wonders, looking over his shoulder.       She stands up on Ted’s back and stretches her legs, steadying herself by holding on to him until she finds her footing. Then she straightens up.      “Taking the plunge,” she chuckles.      The intern jumps then, squeezing her nose closed as she folds herself into a ball before she crashes through the surface. Macy is still cackling when Y/N comes up, unsuccessful at dodging the spatter that came her way. Meanwhile the others cheer her on, now that she has finally joined them. She has completely forgotten about her insecurities, or the cold water that washed all that away. All she can think of is how blessed she is to be here, to gain so much more than just work experience. 

     The crew takes several more dives from the horses, who allow the gambol calmly. Dean drops an impressive dive bomb right between the group, not outdoing his slightly heavier friend Benny, but creating quite a splash nonetheless. Time flies by way too quickly, and before they know it, the sun has disappeared behind the mountains, leaving only dark shades of red and purple to decorate the sky. The air cools quickly and everyone knows they should get ready for the night. Eventually it’s Benny who rattles up the company.      “Alright, y’all. Time for Benny’s famous Southern soul soup. Get your butts to camp and start that fire. I’ve got some cookin’ to do.”      He shoos the tourists out of the creek, following them with the two horses in tow. He looks over his shoulder at his best friend and the intern, who linger. A mischievous grin comes Dean’s way before the farrier straightens himself, walking away whistling. Y/N sniggers at the funny character; looks like he has been acting as the head wrangler’s wingman.      “Smooth,” she comments, a knowing yet amused smile pulling at the corners of her mouth.      “Yeah, he’s real subtle,” Dean chuckles, busted. “Got you alone again, though.”      He comes closer, water moving between them, and suddenly nature goes quiet. His hands end up on her hips, pulling in the girl who is so willingly looking at him. His fingers trace the hem of her white tank top as he dips his head, his nose brushing against hers. 

     Before Y/N knows it, he’s kissing her again. She melts into him, her muscles going slack under his touch. Like the night before, the kiss is gentle and unhurried, giving her a moment to compare the two. His lips are a little more chapped, probably due to the long day in the sun while running low on water. A three day old stubble tickles her skin, the tough hairs slightly longer than yesterday. He’s clean now, fresh water having washed away the sweat and dirt. The first-time nerves aren’t there this evening, but she does feel that same fire rise up from her coil. That same desire to stay here forever, because no kiss has ever felt this good.

     He parts from her, with his hands still splayed on her lower back, looking down on the cowgirl he has hopelessly fallen for. A few clouds reflect the little light that is coming from the horizon, but it’s enough for Dean to notice something. He grins widely, even though he tries to tone it down, as his hands leave her waist to run the pad of his thumb over her cheekbone, sweeping across the area under her eyes. For a second she wonders what he’s trying to brush away, but then it hits her.      “Oh, Lord. I look like a Goth, don’t I?” she realizes, remembering how fond she was to still have a significant amount of mascara on her lashes this morning, helping her feel a little less naked. Now she regrets not washing it off completely.      “More like a sad panda,” Dean chuckles, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth to stifle a laugh.

     Awkwardly she looks down at the water, but the wrangler stops her, hooking his finger under her chin.      “Don’t hide,” he says, his expression soft.      Cupping her face, he wipes away the last black shades from her flushed cheeks, then drinks her in, his eyes flicking over her features. Embarrassment remains prominent in her stance, though. Dean feels his chest tighten a little, because if anything, he did not want to make her feel uneasy.       “You know you don’t have to wear it, right?” he starts, his thumb caressing her soft skin. “The makeup?”      She looks up at him again now, still insecure, but carefully hopeful. Where is he going with this?      “I mean, if you want to and if it makes you feel better, don’t let me stop ya...” he adds, stammering a little bit. “I’m just saying that you don’t need it. You’re beautiful... With or without.”

     A small smile forms on her lips. Again she’s blushing, not from shame, but from flattery this time.       “You think I’m beautiful?” she asks, traces of slight disbelief in her voice.      “Hell, yeah,” Dean assures smirking, half rolling his eyes at her doubt. “And as my lovely cousin told you in such detail, I have snooped around plenty, so I’d know. Those girls ain’t got nothing on you.”      She laughs at the joke, casting her eyes down.       “Hey…”      Y/N glances up, the intensity of his eyes catching her off guard.       “I mean it,” he whispers.       Showing her exactly how amazing she is, he kisses her hard this time, leaving her breathless. Overwhelmed by the intensity she stiffens, but then opens up to him, allowing his tongue to slip past her lips. With her eyes closed she waits, letting him take the lead in their dance.       Careful not to break the moment, Dean leans back, letting himself fall gently into the water, taking her with him. Floating away on waves of elation, he envelopes her in his arms, offering her the warmth of his body in the icy creek. He rises up then, searching for footing again on the floor of pebbles, the water at chest height now. For a second they part, breathing in each other’s air. The wrangler opens his eyes, looking down at the gorgeous woman who is slowly becoming his. Waiting for even the slightest hint of hesitation, he moves his fingers to trace down the hem of her top again, slipping underneath. She gazes back, her eyes piercing with nothing but want, nodding barely noticeable. Dean spots it, though. It’s like the lights on the track jumped to green, meeting her halfway in a kiss much more heated than the previous ones. 

     His hands hike up under her shirt, gliding over her delicate skin as his mouth never leaves hers. A hitching breath passes her lips when the pad of his thumb caresses the underside of her breast, featherlight, yet electrifying. Dean pushes her bra up slightly, almost tracing her nipple, which has hardened both from the cold and arousal. Completely in awe, she rolls her head back a little, exposing her neck. Gladly Dean ghosts over the junction to her shoulder, running his teeth towards her collarbone torturously slow, biting down a groan on the curve. Good Lord. His touch, his tongue, his mouth. Everything about this feels amazing. The freezing water is just the right temperature to cool her heated skin, the swell of the small waves identical to the one she feels in her lower abdomen. The cowboy can have her anyway he wants, she’s not going to fight him on it. In fact, she urges him to keep going, carding her nails through his damp hair and applying pressure once she closes her fingers around the brown locks, darkened by millions of droplets.

     Dean’s right hand descends down her body again while his left remains to attend her soft breast. He follows the arch of her back, then lower, kneading and exploring her behind, firm from years in the saddle. Holy shit, this cannot possibly feel this good. The resolution to take things slow goes right out the window, as his fingers find space above the back of her thigh, following the edge of her underwear. Then he grips her tight there, his other hand sliding to cover the clasp of her bra, not freeing her from it just yet. He lifts her a little, pushing her flush against him. Hungry for the woman in his arms, he covers the top of her breasts with his mouth, the soaked fabric of her top between him and her hot skin. Dean knew it before, but this, this unbelievable display of chemistry only confirms it; she’s it. 

     His lips find hers again, even though she has to keep breaking away in order to get enough air. Her respiration has picked up, every breath coming out labored. She can feel the gentle vibration of a low moan coming from deep within his chest, only adding fuel to the wildfire that is spreading through her body fast. At first she is unaware of the noise of water rustling in the distance, but then Dean freezes. Not understanding why he has stopped, she nuzzles her nose against his cheek, drunk and thirsty for his affection, seeking his mouth, but the wrangler is focussed on something else. Confused Y/N opens her eyes, looking up at the handsome man, whose eyes are fixed on the estuary of La Barge Creek to Canyon Lake.      “Dean?”      “You hear that?” he whispers.

     The sound of water moving and the fragile surface breaking dawns on her now and she follows his gaze into the dark. Then she hears a neigh and her heart skips a beat. That wasn’t one of theirs.      “Find the water…”      “Find the herd,” Dean finishes her sentence.      Still in his embrace, she watches the mystical sight, able to make out the shapes now under a faint moon, once the clouds move away from blocking the light. The group of horses crosses the creek, some stopping to drink. Dean lets out a relieved laugh, turning to face Y/N again.      “We found them,” she smiles.      “We did,” he whispers.      He kisses her briefly, knowing that he has to warn Benny, before the herd moves away. He drowns in her eyes a little longer, though, the ignited ecstasy still sparkling visibly in her pupils. His heart swells, his mind calms. He knows. He has found so much more than just the horses on this trail. 

Thank you for reading. I appreciate every single one of you, but if you do want to give me some extra love, you are free to reblog my work or buy me coffee (Link in bio at the top of the page)

Read part fourteen here

[quarantinemusiccalendar]

Day 251: The Verve - Forth

The Verve may very likely be the band that holds the record for breaking up the the most. As of writing this in late 2020, they have split 3 times now.

And The Bittersweet Symphony may be their biggest hit and also their biggest pain, given the royalties issue that took over 20 years to settle (Mick Jagger and Keith Richards have eventually given up their share of the song and gave it to Ashcroft in May 2019), but in my opinion the best record of The Verve is not the one with The Bittersweet Symphony on it. Urban Hymns (1997) is a very good album. But I would argue that Forth (2008) is even better.

Forth, as well as many of Ashcroft’s solo albums, is also a window into a creative mind dealing with issues. Having nearly ended on anti-depressants in my early thirties and getting away with a doing “therapy only“ for few months myself I did have a taste of the sort of dark place Ashcroft’s songwriting is coming from. I know the swings between ecstatic creative and dark paralyzing episodes. In this scenario, creativity can come from an euphoric place full of joy and energy or even from a dark melancholic place where you shut the world off, but your senses are so sharp and focused that you can come up with something dark yet brilliant. On this album, the best illustration of the state of mind first mentioned is Love Is Noise. Sit and wonder or Numbness on the other hand have a kind of energy about it, that makes me think it’s coming from the latter one. Both beautiful songs, but very very different. And then there are the truly paralyzing periods of dark deep sadness where, in the best case scenario, one only wants to melt into the background and not be anymore. And to be honest, without these mental conditions a lot of great art work and music would never even exist. I don’t want to glorify it in any way. It truly sucks when you’re dealing with it and it depends a on what specific condition it is. But whereas some disorders are only crippling and destructive, other ones, a bipolar disorder for example, can come with a period of heightened creativity or sharpened senses as side effects. My point is, that many great works of art would probably never even came into existence without the mentally altered minds of their creators. So at least something good comes out of it. Sometimes. Valium Skies and Appalachian Springs may be also reflections of experiences of mental health issues, but these are coming from a good place of calmness and confidence.

Musically, the record sounds totally like The Verve we know from the 90s, yet at the same time it’s more confident, consistant, streamlined and elegant. And the fact that it’s also less raw and a bit more polished my be a bit detrimental, but it is to be expected. It would be  quite weird and even suspicious if musicians didn’t get better at their craft with age.

Love Is Noise is an addictive dance - rock epic. It’s full of hooks and over spilling with energy, yet it’s a comment on the destructiveness of human encroachment and a warning that once we lose something, it's gone forever. 

Although they are individually very distinct and very different, Rather Be, Columbo and Valium Skies could have come from the Urban Hymns (1997) record. They would fit right in. Ashcroft’s anthemic instincts melt beautifully with guitarist McCabe’s experimental streak to be greater than the sum of their parts. In that, they are typical Verve songs. (1)

Valium Skies is a love ballad and it’s about living with depression as well. In an interview with BBC Steve Lamacq, Richard Ashcroft explained this song: "The term Valium Skies has been in my mind for 10, 15 years. You get them all over the country but back home, up North, sometimes that grey, grey, grey cloud seems so low you can almost touch it and, but it was also a metaphor for depression and it's about being with someone who recognizes almost where you can go, how dark you can go but still is with you. He's in a band and he knew every time when you're breaking down, you know. 'When it comes to my Valium skies, she don't mind if I cry,' and I think that's a test of any relationship, I think, and really I was trying to get that across, I think. It's one of them songs that you first hear and then after a couple of listens it, the chorus had me for about a month after we recorded that. I was just, I couldn't get it out of my mind and it, yet it doesn't seem like an obvious single song or anything and again good playing by everyone, great guitars and good work." (2)

Rather Be is a statement against the constant information overload we’re living in and the human need to live “in the moment”. The song was apparently way more experimental and psychedelic at an earlier stage of the process, but at the end it was decided to put the more song-like version on the record. But I am really curious, how did it sound like. It may not be a constant hit, but have a feeling I would like it better.

The musical highlights of the whole album are easily Colombo and Appalachian Springs. Colombo is a shoegazing epic with a shamanic guitar line and a hypnotizing beat. Appalachian Springs is an atmospheric giant with wonderful guitar swells. And it’s one of the best songs The Verve has ever recorded.

Someone has summed the record up in one of the user reviews saying “It’s a great album, but it won’t be anyones favourite.“ And I do agree. But I would also add “who cares“. It may not be my favourite album of the decade, but it’s a good one and it’s totally worth listening.

Happy Monday, relax and enjoy.

Album highlights: - Love Is Noise - Rather Be - Columbo - Valium Skies - Appalachian Springs

Playlist:   https://spoti.fi/3bB5lH7  

Links and references:   - The Verve - Wikipedia   (1) P. Stokes (14 August 2008) The Verve – ‘Forth’ review. NME. (2) Valium Skies by The Verve. Songfacts.com

[theonlycampix]

Okay I got tagged by both @porygonprince​ and @eevyerndracaneon​ so even though I’m not the type of person who normally does these let’s go

Rules: Answer 17 questions, tag 17 people (I don’t really like tagging people generally bc I feel awkward doing it :x) <-- this is :x not :x) I had to close the bracket

Nicknames: Basically everyone IRL calls me Cam - I can’t remember the last time I was called by my full first name. Other than that, Campix is...also very infrequent. Yeah it’s basically just Cam

Zodiac: Carcinogenics. Cancer. It’s...it’s a joke about cancer. I’m a Cancer. Homestuck did not invent the ‘carcino’ prefix alright that’s why he’s got that handle because ‘carcino’ means cancerous

Height: 6′. Much to the chagrin of my boyfriend.

Hogwarts: Hufflepuffle but like...I never really engaged much in HP

Last thing I Googled: Whether ‘carcino’ actually was a prefix that meant cancer or not (it is)

Followers: I honestly haven’t checked in forever and I don’t really check much but uhhhh 215 apparently

Song in my Head: That one song that plays when the *KSHZHZHZT* show up in the *KHZTHHZTHZTGHTH* during *KZHTHZ* Interlude V. Sorry about if u aren’t innoculated lol i hate that TAZ made me wait over 69 (nice) hours until I started slamming my head against the wall like I wanted (still was an entertaining listen though)

Sleep: Generally around 6 hours or so. I’m trying to go for 8 but I stay up late a lot of the time and if I want 8, I have to go to bed at around 11:30

Lucky Number: This one’s easier to read spelled out than with actual numbers. Came up with it when I was in Grade 4, added onto it in Grade 6, and kept it. Seventeen-hundred sixty-twelve point fourteen (1772.14, 17612.14, or 17006012.14 depending on how you want to note it.) I just wanted to make the most incorrectly phrased number. ‘Seventeen-hundred’ starts out alright, it’s a little unconventional compared to ‘one thousand, seven hundred’ but it works. ‘Sixty-twelve’ is just flat-out wrong. And ‘point fourteen’ is an incorrect way of saying ‘point one four’. So...yeah there’s a whole paragraph about my lucky number. As of yet, it has not come up. My discord tag is actually a reference to this number, if you have me on discord.

Dream Job: A fiction author. Not a super-duper famous one, but...I’d love to be able to write stories, whether they be books, games, podcasts, campaigns...I just love making worlds and characters.

Wearing: An old ‘ENFP’ shirt (The Myers-Briggs ENFP) that my mom got me for my 17th birthday. Or was it Christmas? Anyway it’s a really comfy shirt even if the design on the front is super faded.

Favourite Instrument: I’ve got a few. I love the way the guitar sounds but I absolutely hate its layout. This is because I grew up playing the piano and singing (my favourite ones to play well) and the piano is very well-organized. B and A are next to each other, and C# is between C and D. The guitar was made by someone who hates order. Or if they like order, they made the guitar according to the rules of fuckin 4D Chess. As for my favourite instrument to play that I can’t play well, that’d have to be the theremin.

Favourite Songs: Oh boy I have a lot. Tessellate by soupandreas, Face the Night by Tennyson, Sun Spat by EMEFE, Liftoff by Discoholic, When He Died and My Trains by Lemon Demon, Carried Home by Marcus Warner, Atlantique Sud by M83, Fireflies by Owl City, Superseded by Simpli, a BUNCH of songs by OK Go, DiscoVision by Anders Enger Jensen, Heartbeat by Jeddi, Fly Like a Butterfly and Funky Dealer by Hideki Naganuma, Sparkle from Your Name, Telling Myself by Nicholas Podany, Deja Vu by Ataraxia... (I’m just reading off my ‘All-Time Favourites’ playlist on Spotify at this point.)

Aesthetic: Arcades, digital, auroras, lo-fi

Favourite Author: Probably Lemony Snicket. He’s the one who encouraged me to start writing in the first place, and I take a lot of inspiration from him.

Favourite Animal Noise: Probably my dog Charlie’s barks. He’s a little shih-tzu and he’s so old and they’re just...pitiful. They sound like ‘oorghf’, like when an old dude stands up from a chair.

Random Thought:  I’m probably responsible for one of my friend’s crippling hanafuda addiction.

Tagging @nickel-for-a-nakysha (I’m sorry about the addiction) because I’m too nervous about tagging anyone else and also I don’t know if you’d even want to? So I know it’s a little lame to say but if you follow me and you want to do this, pretend I tagged you - if I didn’t but I know you it’s probably just because I’m nervous and didn’t want to bother you

[therealpurposeoflife]

Dear Humaira, I have lost everything because of a crippling addiction and i am doing a 12 step program for it and they are telling me God will heal me and I think I know that because I was raised muslim but I realize I don't know anything about the God I supposedly worshipped all my life that's why I became an addict I didn't think God was enough. I am trying to connect again and it's hard because no connection is coming. Maybe I am a bad Muslim. Any thoughts on finding God again?

Hey there! I think you’re very brave for making this conscious decision to come out of this addiction as a stronger person with a desire to find God again. I admire your courage. You are not alone. Just think of your heart that has been rusted for a while. It’s going to take some work to remove that rust and let the light shine again. And the fact that you’re already on the journey should make you optimistic.

Don’t overburden yourself when you dont feel a connection. We’re human. We have highs and lows in faith. It’s part of the struggle. And since you’re in the recovery process, you must be gentle with yourself. Give yourself time. You are not a bad Muslim. You are being too harsh with yourself. I think you identified the lack of connection in the above message yourself! The fact that you probably didnt know much about God is a strong reason for not feeling connection too. How can we possibly love someone we don’t know? It needs time and nurturing. Of course in Islam, we do believe that all humans are born on the fitrah(an innate tendency to know and recognise God) but then in the process of battling temptations and the tests of the world, we get pretty lost sometimes. And that’s okay as long as we go back to Him. It’s humbling to know that we have a chance and our past doesn’t define us or set our future into stone.

So do just one thing- get to really know God. And how do we do that? He gave us His names- we get to know them through the Qur’an and some names appear in Hadith literature too. So I have been watching this series- it’s super chilled, full of dialogue and banter but also great learning content to get to know God through His 99 names. Could you take out just 10 minutes everyday? Just 10 minutes a day- one or two names of God per day, not more and I promise you- it will help you find God again. Here is the link of the series. I hope this helps! Let me know if you need anything else :) Take care of yourself

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL9kNYOUgRrmcoLBleoNQGnNg4iZKIyoAB

[midnineties]

Was tagged by @old-memoria 💕 thank you babe (i love doing these lmao)

zodiac

Scorpio sun, Aries moon, Leo rising ✨

height:

165-ish cm. Haven’t measured myself in awhile so I’m not completely sure

put your playlist on shuffle and list the first 4 songs:

Stealin’ - Arlo Guthrie

No Pressure - The Kooks

Those Were The Days - Dolly Parton

Eye in the Sky - The Alan Parsons Project

grab the nearest book and turn to page 23; what does line 17 say?

“So keeping up an interchange of favours, like good men in the truth of their behaviours”

From Keats’s Poetry and Prose.

when was the last time you played air guitar?

Last night while listening to ac/dc

what is a sound you love and what is a sound you hate?

I love the sound of rain and I HATE chewing noises ewwwww

do you believe in ghosts?

Yes and no. I’ve seen and heard some shit y’all and on the off chance they’re real I ain’t fuckin with it just in case! Like ouija boards and bloody mary and all that jazz - BIG nope

do you drive? and if so have you ever been in an accident?

No, driving makes me super anxious so I’m putting it off big time

do you believe in aliens?

Duh. The universe is seemingly infinite so the chances of there being other intelligent beings out there is pretty likely imo

do you like the smell of gasoline?

Hmm from a distance maybe. If it gets too strong I feel dizzy

do you have an obsession right now?

Other than my crippling bob obsession u mean 😪

Been really into a new book series that I can’t put down

in a relationship?

Nope, I’m super undateable lmao

Have an addiction?

Tbh? Music. If I go a day without listening to music I get irate, sad and almost twitchy

I’ m tagging @strange-ddays @ringostardom @punkslapped & @secretariatjohnkerry 🌻

[ace-disaster-weeb]

Some POV playlists I'd make if I actually had the skills to make YouTube videos:

1. "POV: You're a character in a Coming-of-Age Indie movie"

All I know for sure is that "Freaks" by Surf Cruise would have to be on the playlist. It just has a really specific vibe to it that I really like.

2. "POV: You're trying to help, but it always backfires (vent playlist)"

3. "Yet another Gifted Kid Burnout playlist"

Some songs I'd include here would be "Brutal" by Olivia Rodrigo, "Hey Kids" by Molina, and "Back in School" by Mother Mother.

4. "POV: You're me"

A few songs here would be "Imaginary" by Evanescence, "Never Too Late" by Three Days Grace, and "Never Surrender" by Skillet. Yes, I'm aware of how emo this is, but I swear not every song on the playlist would be like this.

5. "A Weirdcore/Dreamcore playlist"

This is probably one of the most fleshed out playlists I've thought of. Some of the songs would be "Six Forty Seven" by Instupendo, "I'd Rather Sleep" by Kero Kero Bonito, "Hey Kids" by Molina (I really like that song OK), and "Still Life" by Sitcom.

6. I don't really have a title for this one, so read my description here for info:

OK, so I have a ton of OCs. It would appear that I have a crippling addiction to character creation. One set of characters that I'm working on right now, which this playlist is about, is an Adventurer's Guild of DnD characters who are all based on the various fandoms I've been in and my experiences with them (I might eventually post them all here!). I've given each member their own theme song, so the playlist would be full of those.

7. "POV: You're in a fist fight with the Mastermind in the halls of Hope's Peak (a Danganronpa inspired playlist)"

8. "POV: the person you love sacrificed themselves to save everyone"

9. "POV: You traveled back in time to save everyone"

[wrylywriting]

coffee and playlist!

coffee ; what's your favorite beverage to drink while writing?

Coffee, since I was a barista for many years I have had a crippling caffeine addiction. or just put anything in front of me that has a straw and baby I'm sucking on it!!!!! This is how I get myself to drink more water bc my caveman brain is like mmm straw.

playlist ; do you make playlists for your characters or wips?

I made a playlist for time is on my side just so I can inflict onto everyone my awful taste in 60s/70s music just as my father once did to me, but that's the only one! I like the idea of listening to music and reading, but sometimes my brain can't take it.

[kirwond]

Shuffle Time: A Persona 3 Playlist

Listen at Spotify.

Even more playlists here.

Tracklist + notes below the cut.

Disturbia -- Rihanna

it's a thief in the night to come and grab you it can creep up inside you and consume you a disease of the mind it can control you it's too close for comfort

Brown Eyed Girl – Van Morrison (Yukari Takeba)

skipping and a-jumping in the misty morning fog with our our hearts a-thumping and you my brown-eyed girl

  Pretty Fly (For a White Guy) – The Offspring (Junpei Iori)

he may not have a clue and he may not have style but everything he lacks well he makes up in denial

  Killer Queen -- Queen (Mitsuru Kirijo)

dynamite with a laser beam guaranteed to blow your mind anytime

It’s a Fight – Three 6 Mafia (Akihiko Sanada)

I'm the man there's no defeating the ground you will be eating I'm ready sharp non stop this is easy

Kids With Guns -- Gorillaz

kids with guns kids with guns easy does it easy does it they got something to say no to

Lone Wolf – The Eels (Shinjiro Aragaki)

nobody needs to get too close to me you'll only see this truth I am a lone wolf

  Angel -- Chiara

(Fuuka Yamagishi)

I’ll be the sunshine when you’re feeling blue I’m always here for you

Personal Jesus – Depeche Mode (Takaya) things on your chest you need to confess I will deliver you know I'm a forgiver

Ladies of the World – Flight of the Conchords (Operation Babe Hunt)

outta sight amazin' ladies late night hard workin' ladies erudite brainy ladies hermaphrodite lady-man-ladies

Lithium Flower – Yoko Kanno (Aigis)

and is she really human she's just so something new a waking lithium flower just about to bloom I smell lithium now

Beyond the Sea – Bobby Darin (Koromaru)

we’ll meet beyond the shore we’ll kiss just as before happy we’ll be beyond the sea and never again I’ll go sailin’

  Are You Old Enough -- Dragon (Ken Amada)

so won't you tell me won't you tell me the truth are you old enough? Fucked Up Girl – The Vandals (Junpei + Chidori)

I understand all the problems you got I'll stay up nights on a suicide watch for you

Getting Away With Murder – Papa Roach (Shuji Ikutsuki)

and I'm addicted to your punishment and you're the master and I am craving this disaster Closer – Kings of Leon (Ryoji Mochizuki)

skies are blinking at me I see a storm bubbling up from the sea and it's coming closer

 Imagine – A Perfect Circle (Nyx)

nothing to kill or die for and no religion too imagine all the people living life in peace

War – Poets of the Fall (Final Battle vs Nyx)

do you remember standing on a broken field white crippled wings beating the sky the harbingers of war with their nature revealed and our chances flowing by

  Brand New Days – Yumi Kawamura

itsuka tsunaida te no tsuyosa ni kizutsuite mo zettai hanasanai yo [Even if someday the strength with which you're holding my hand becomes painful I definitely won't let go]

[mab1905]

Okay it’s playlist time, y’all ready?

Both of these playlists are for the characters Leonid Toptunov and Sasha Akimov in the Chernobyl HBO Miniseries. (As well as their ship, Toptumov).

“It’s The Little Things”

- mostly 70’s and 80’s rock

- classic rock, glam rock, soft rock, some pop, some new wave

- generally fun, dance-around-lip-syncing-in-your-shower-fun

- 58 tracks, 3h 37min

- the type of thing I could imagine Leonid getting a bootleg tape of from the west, he introduces Sasha to all this new music. They listen and Leonid can even get Sasha to dance to it even though they don’t know the lyrics.

- made alongside my fanart by the same name

“Love In The Time Of Socialism”

- more diverse in terms of music genre

- mostly art pop, rock, and indie/acoustic, although there is some classical and purely instrumental songs

- very specific vibe that’s very difficult to explain

- sad but,,, content? and very much hopelessly in love

- name of playlist comes from a song title

- 50 tracks, 3h 18min

- songs ordered in a specific way, I would suggest listening through it begining to end rather than on shuffle

- this I see more as a soundtrack then something the two would actually interact with themselves

- image at the bottom is my planning page for this playlist. It helps me to write out each song if I’m going to be putting them into a specific order, as well as see which could be removed

[therecordscratch]

Album Review!

Marina (and the Diamonds) - Electra Heart

Released April 27, 2012

A bit of a throwback, MARINA’s sophomore album was a staple in my freshman year playlist and I thought what better to complement MARINA’s most recent album than do my favorite of her releases (Based on my CD copy trackless and Spotify)- Let’s go:

Track 1 : Bubblegum Bitch - Right off the bat we have a high energy jam. You can’t no feel badass blasting this song. Marina’s iconic singing style comes in with the power and drive that carries the whole album. I love the echoing vocals and the seductive sounding instrumentals, it wraps the song together perfectly! Welcome to the life of Electra Heart. This song also does a nice job of setting the stage for the songs that come up later in the album, a great first track!

Track 2 : Primadonna - The album’s lead single, this song follows in Bubblegum BItch’s shoes. I love the keys and mixing on this song, it pairs so well with Marina’s vocal style! Electra Heart’s ego complex is strong in this one, addicted to drama: Living life like I'm in a play / In the limelight I want to stay / I know I've got a big ego / I really don't know why it's such a big deal though The acoustic guitar in the bridge with the build up is my favorite part, for sure. 

Track 3 : Lies - A bit of a slower song, you can feel the weight in Marina’s voice. Calling out the narrator’s significant other on their cowardice is conveyed clearly in the lyrics: You only ever touch me in the dark / Only if we're drinking can you see my spark I love the feeling this song radiates, you close your eyes and sway, letting the anger build in your chest - it’s so interesting and I love what she was able to do with it!

Track 4 : Homewrecker - Gotta love the spoken intro on the track! The third sister to Primadonna and Bubblegum Bitch, it’s a callout to this who play the victim and Marina said herself she wanted to “turn the tables.” I absolutely love her vocals in the track especially, it even sounds seductive and powerful - a strong song with a beautiful acapella at the end? So damn good.

Track 5 : Starring Role -  One of my favorite tracks, Marina put it best herself: “You don’t want to live in reality. That’s why you’re an artist. You’re on the run.” The way Marina uses her voice to convey such intricate feelings in the listener, it’s such a cool thing to experience as you listen to her music. The percussion in this track is steady and strong. The bridge on this song is interesting- creating a different sound and a different power behind her voice.

Track 6 : The State Of Dreaming - I learned this song is actually inspired by Marilyn Monroe which explains the detailed references. It’s such a unique tracks and I think it’s criminally unrelated. I Loe what Marina did with this one and it’s lyrics: All I really want is to be wonderful / People in this town they, they can be so cruel one of Monroe’s famous quotes that display the parallel between the album’s “character” Electra Heart and Marilyn Monroe herself. Overall, a track that deserves a listen two fold.

Track 7 : Power & Control - Ugh I absolutely love her vocals on this track especially. The intro is light and mischievous and it comes in strong with the harmonies in the back - You cannot be bored listening to Marina sing her heart out. One sided relationships are tackled in the cracks of this song. I love the mixing on this tracks s well, the beat gets me every time! Steady and strong. 

Track 8 : Sex Yeah - A “call for action” for our society’s virgin-mother-whore complex - pick one and deal with it. I love how point blank and “fuck you” this song is! The chorus: If history could set you free (from who you were supposed to be) / If sex in our society (didn't tell a girl who she would be) / 'Cause all my life I've tried to fight what history has given me wraps up this songs intent perfectly - an anthem for women and girls everywhere. 

Track 9 : Teen Idle - Another one of my favorites, the pun in the title is a perfect start for this track. I love the repetitive reference to herself as “I”  in the verse, it captures the narcissistic ideology with the crippling insecurity lurking below. The gentle keys in this song with, of course, Marina’s powerful vocals create a dark vibe in this track. I’m sure I’m not the only woman who can relate to what she’s explaining in this track.

Track 10 : Valley of the Dolls - Talk about a dark vibe. The hollow vocals and steady clapping in the background capture an empty void feeling. One of my favorite sets of lyrics from the verse : Pick a personality for free / When you feel like nobody We’re all trying to become someone, whether that’s our most authentic selves or the complete opposite, we all have artificial parts to ourselves. One of my favorite tracks, yet again.

Track 11 : Hypocrates - A change of pace, this song is more sweet and gentle sounding. I adore the fun things she does with her voice in the chorus, trills maybe? I’m not completely sure but I dig it either way. Favorite lyrics :  Yeah you played the martyr for so long / That you can’t do anything wrong The narrator’s partner is constantly calling her out for issues when they have plenty on their own. There’s also a great guitar solo type break! I love it.

Track 12 : How to be a Heartbreaker -  A break in style, this one is similar to the trio of songs. Apparently this track is only on the American version of the album, but it’s a fun one none the less. If you need a break from the more heavy and altered songs, this song does that for you. I love the breakdown with the mixing and the bouncy beat. Sometimes playing dumb and hard-to-get I the path of least resistance: We don't want our hearts to break, in two / So it's better to be fake / Can't risk losing in love again, babe Such a fun track :). 

Track 13 : Radioactive - First of all, a really cool intro! This track showcases Marina’s vocals against a more simple, yet catchy instrumental. A fun, catchy track I could hear on a summer song playlist. The outro is one of my favorite parts : My heart is nuclear / Love is all that I fear So point blank and a different ending to this song. The bridge too, I love the classic pop instrumentals. An underrated one for sure.

Track 14 : Fear and Loathing - The emotion in this song is so strong I absolutely love it. You can feel the turning point of the narrator in this song and it’s a perfect choice as a resolution to the album (the standard version, anyway) Favorite verse: Got different people inside my head / I wonder which one that they like best / I'm done with tryna have it all / And ending up with not much at all I felt these lyrics deep in my core. This is perhaps the strongest track on the whole album, so beautiful. 

Album Overview - This album is full of powerful messages, internal struggles and resolutions that make the audience feel for the narrator entirely. From more humorous and bouncy tracks to ones that you could read about for hours, MARINA came in with this album and blew expectations out of the water. I think she did a fantastic job and I’m honored to have this album in my memories and my music collection!

Let me know what you think of this album! If you have an album you’d like me to review, shoot me an ask! Until then, I’ll talk to you guys in the next one. :)

Source: Genius

[perfectus-in-morte]

Get to know me more! (Yes, I'm obsessed.)

I was tagged by the ever-lovely @hannibalssweaters 🖤🖤🖤 Rules: Tag 9 people to do this too! Are you named after anyone? Yep! Elvis' daughter! When was the last time you cried? Lmao oh boy. Um this morning when The Demon King came up on my playlist. Also, Reloader. And then at lunch I cried because I found a baby kitten and it kissed my nose. I'm an emotional person. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Do you like handwriting? I LOVE handwriting! I'm working on my calligraphy skills and it's addicting! What’s your favorite lunch meat? Ew? Can I just say that steak is my favorite even though it's a full course meal and not a lunch meat? Do you have kids? No, thank god. I can barely take care of myself and my pets. I'm a wreck. If you were another person would you be friends with you? Yes! Like, I've got a pretty rad taste in music and I'd like to have me around to fangirl over everything. Do you use sarcasm? It's my native language. Do you still have your tonsils? I actually do not. Do you bungee jump? Fuuuuck no. What’s your favorite cereal? Oh god. Um Cocoa Puffs, granola, and Raisin Bran because I'm a granny. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Lmao no, I'm ether wearing sperrys, vans, or converse and I've got the converse pre-tied. Ain't nobody got time for fucking with shoelaces. Do you think you’re a strong person? I mean, I've been through a lot, so I guess? I'm not dead yet. What’s your favorite ice cream? WHY MAKE ME CHOOSE?! Um cookie dough and butter pecan are my top two contenders. Ooh and coffee nut! What’s the first thing you notice about people? Their body language/energy. And then their eyes or smiles. But I never really look anyone in the eyes, so it's usually their energy I notice. What’s the least favorite thing you like about yourself? My almost crippling mental health and my body. So, like, everything? What color pants and shoes are you wearing right now? Lmao black leggings with the moon phases on them, no shoes. What are you listening to right now? Still Loving You by Scorpions, which weirdly followed right after Robokitty by Excision. So clearly, my music tastes are all over the place. If you were a crayon what color would you be? Ooh dark green. Like a deep forest green. What’s your favorite smell? Lavender, Earl Grey tea, tulips, mahogany teakwood, and petrichor. Who’s the last person you talked to on the phone? Lmfao my mother. She called me and told me (knowing full well I had people in the car and my calls come through my cars Bluetooth speakers) that Omega plays his guitar like he's getting the best blowjob of his life. Thanks, mom. Favorite sport to watch? Um are concerts a sport? Because I hate sports but seeing the Ghouls jump around on stage seems like it should be applicable. Hair color? A stupid mousy dark brown 😒 Eye color? Ugh, also brown. Do you wear contacts? Nope. Favorite food to eat? I just love food, okay? I guess if I had to pick? Crab Rangoon, pineapple chicken, French fries, the flesh of my fallen enemies, tacos, spaghetti, fruit. Scary movies or comedy? Scary! Last movie you watched? The Lost Boys 🖤 Color of shirt your wearing? Black MCR shirt 🖤 Summer or winter? Can I choose neither? Spring and fall all the way! Hugs or kisses? Both! What book are you currently reading? Lmao Psychology Today's latest magazine currently, but book wise I'm in the middle of The Lucifer Effect. Who do you miss right now? OMEGAAAA 😭😩 but also my cat because he's been avoiding me all week and I need his love 😒 What’s on your mousepad? I don't have a mousepad at home 🤷🏻‍♀️ What’s the last TV show you watched? I'm binge watching Justified. What’s the best sound? Papa E growling 🙌🏼🙏🏻 Rolling Stones or the Beetles? Both, except I'm more inclined to the Stones because I had a terribly creepy nightmare where I had to marry Paul McCartney to pay off student loan debt and now I'm haunted my visions of a naked elderly Paul chasing me in a mansion and I'm terrified lmao this is why you don't watch their documentary and drink before bed, kiddos. What’s the furthest you’ve ever traveled? I've been to Cali, D.C., Texas and like 10 other states, but I'm too lazy to write them out. I've yet to go north. But I've got my sights set on the Scandinavian countries. *cough cough* Sweden. Do you have a special talent? Sarcasm? Sexual innuendos? Bad puns? Dad jokes? Making things awkward? Where were you born? In a hospital? Jesus, I'm not a heathen. Nor am I Jesus because I wasn't born in a barn. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I'm now tagging: @crashloves @grucified @petalplush @stranger-ghoul @mysticairghuleh @flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash @lysergic-saturnine-desert @ghuleh-101 @grungedaddykinks Sorry if you've already been previously tagged by someone else! I also invite everyone to do this because I love getting to know y'all!

[mab1905]

More Fitzjames content? Yeah... here’s a playlist for ya’ll...

These are songs which I think describe him at different points in his character developement or simply different aspects of his personality. Somewhat James/Crozier (Fitzier) but all about James.

(25 songs, 1 hour 33 min)

Song List + Most Character-Relevant Lyrics:

Fancy — Orville Peck

We didn't have money for food or rent / To say the least, we was hard pressed / Then Mama spent every last penny we had / To buy me a dancin' dress / Mama washed and combed and curled my hair / And she painted my eyes and lips / Stepped into a satin dancin' dress / That had a slit in the side clean up to my hips / It was red velvet trim, and it fit me good / Starin' back from the lookin' glass / There stood a woman where a half-gown boy had stood / ... / It sounded like somebody else that was talkin' / Askin', "Mama, what do I do?" / She said, "Just be nice to the gentlemen, Fancy / They'll be nice to you" / "Here's your one chance, Fancy, don't let me down / Here's your one chance, Fancy, don't let me down / Lord, forgive me for what I do / But if you want out, well, it's up to you / Now don't let me down now / Your mama's gonna move you uptown"

gold rush — Taylor Swift

What must it be like / To grow up that beautiful? / With your hair falling into place like dominos / ... / At dinner parties / I call you out on your contrarian shit / And the coastal town / We wandered 'round had never / Seen a love as pure as it / And then it fades into the gray of my day old tea / 'Cause you know it could never be

The Name Of The Game — ABBA

Your smile, and the sound of your voice / And the way you see through me / Got a feeling, you give me no choice / But it means a lot to me / So I wanna know / What's the name of the game?

Spectrum — Florence + The Machine

And when we come for you / We'll be dressed up all in blue / With the ocean in our arms / Kiss your eyes and kiss your palms / And when it's time to pray / We'll be dressed up all in grey / With metal on our tongues / And silver in our lungs / ... / And when we come back we'll be dressed in black / And you'll scream my name aloud / And we won't eat and we won't sleep / We'll drag bodies from the ground / So say my name / And every colour illuminates / And we are shining / And we'll never be afraid again

Dreamy Bruises — Sylvan Esso

How can we question / What we knows feels right / Black eyes turn to marigolds / In the morning light / Ohweeohweeoh kids move so slow / Shaken all over like some dogs at the pool / Ohweeohweeoh kids move so slow / They’re kicken all the records over acting like they hanging water / Ohweeohweeoh kids move so slow / Down in the basement where the sun don't show / Ohweeohweeoh kids movie so slow / Naked dollars wonder piles dreamy bruises rotten lovers / And they say I want you / To bend me back in two / To make me sing your tune / To make those words so smooth / Fill me like a song do

Wolf — Sylvan Esso

But no birds nor beast does he eat / He only wants the tenderest meat / And oh the sounds he makes them speak / Under all different patterns of sheets / ... / The modern wolf, the modern wolf / Drippin' in all the lives that he took / He'll go on home, try to wash them off / But when he shaves, he hears them call

Francis Forever — Mitski

On sunny days I go out walking / I end up on a tree-lined street / I look up at the gaps of sunlight / I miss you more than anything / I don't need the world to see / That I've been the best I can be, but / I don't think I could stand to be / Where you don't see me / And autumn comes when you're not yet done / With the summer passing by, but / I don't think I could stand to be / Where you don't see me

James — MGMT

James / If you need a friend / Come right over / Don't even knock / And I'll be home / The door is always open / And we both can say, "Who's laughing now?" / Oh, James / My little doll / You just go outside and you call / Oh, James / Oh, you're never too far off / If your fire's out / There's no need to shout / I'm always home / And walk on in / I'll make you tea and breakfast / And we both can say, "Who's laughing now?"

South London Forever — Florence + The Machine

I drive past the place that I was born / And the places that I used to drink / Young and drunk and stumbling in the street / Outside the Joiners Arm's like foals unsteady on their feet / With the art students and the boys in bands / High on E and holding hands with someone that I just met / I thought it doesn't get / Better than this / There can be nothing better than this / Better than this / And we climbed onto the roof, the museum / And someone made love in the glass / And I'd forgot my name / And the way back to my mother's house / With your black cool eyes and your bitten lips / The world is at your fingertips / It doesn't get better than this / What else could be better than this? / Oh, don't you know I have seen / I have seen the fields aflame / And everything I ever did / Was just another way to scream your name

Oh! You Pretty things — David Bowie

I think about a world to come / Where the books were found by the Golden ones / Written in pain, written in awe / By a puzzled man who questioned / What we work here for / All the strangers came today / And it looks as though they're here to stay / Oh You Pretty Things (Oh You Pretty Things) / Don't you know you're driving your / Mamas and Papas insane / Oh You Pretty Things (Oh You Pretty Things) / Don't you know you're driving your / Mamas and Papas insane / Let me make it plain / You gotta make way for the Homo Superior

Venus As A Boy — Björk

His wicked sense of humor / Suggests exciting sex / His fingers they focus on her and touches / He's Venus as a boy / ... / All across your lips, oh, then until / Well be that it's a little now, until / He believes in a beauty / He's Venus as a boy / He believes in a beauty and gentle

Winds Change — Orville Peck

Had a lover but I lost my patience / Gonna get a song on a radio station / Got a fire but you just can't use it / I don't mean no lies, baby, please don't lose it / Lost my way on the other side / I know why, I don't know when / From the way that we said goodbye / I knew I'd never see you again / Left my mind in the Salt Lake City / Met a lot of men who would call me pretty / Pack of reds, watch the days get colder / Don't it make you cry, how we're getting older?

Fluorescent Adolescent — Arctic Monkeys

Oh the boy's a slag / The best you ever had / The best you ever had is just a memory / And those dreams weren't as daft as they seem / Not as daft as they seem / My love, when you dream them up... / Flicking through a little book of sex tips / Remember when the boys were all electric? / Now when she's told she's gonna get it / I'm guessing that she'd rather just forget it / Clinging to not getting sentimental / Said she wasn't going but she went still / Likes her gentlemen not to be gentle / Was it a Mecca dauber or a betting pencil? / Oh the boy's a slag / The best you ever had / The best you ever had is just a memory / And those dreams weren't as daft as they seem / Not as daft as they seem / My love, when you dream them up / Falling about / You took a left off Last Laugh Lane / Just sounding it out / But you're not coming back again.

Cheerleader — St. Vincent

I've had good times / With some bad guys / I've told whole lies / With a half smile / Held your bare bones / With my clothes on / I've thrown rocks / Then hid both my arms / I've played dumb / When I knew better / Tried so hard / Just to be clever / I know honest thieves / I call family / I've seen America / With no clothes on / I don't know what I deserve / But for you I could work / Cause I don’t want to be a cheerleader no more

Queen Bitch — David Bowie

She's so swishy in her satin and tat / In her frock coat and bipperty-bopperty hat / Oh God, I could do better than that / Oh, yeah / She's an old-time ambassador / Of sweet talking, night walking games / Oh and she's known in the darkest clubs / For pushing ahead of the dames / If she says she can do it / Then she can do it, she don't make false claims / But she's a queen and such a queen / Such a laughter is sucked in their brains / Now she's leading him on / And she'll lay him right down / Yes, she's leading him on / And she'll lay him right down / But it could have been me / Yes, it could have been me

Boys Keep Swinging — David Bowie

Heaven loves ya / The clouds part for ya / Nothing stands in your way / When you're a boy / Clothes always fit ya / Life is a pop of the cherry / When you're a boy / When you're a boy / You can wear a uniform / When you're a boy / Other boys check you out / You get a girl / These are your favorite things / When you're a boy / Boys / Boys / Boys keep swinging

Caterpillars (Of The Common Wealth) — Will Connolly

You know you'll always be my valentine / Now swear to god that you will never tell / They're streaming every indiscretion live / For caterpillars of the commonwealth / Gotta go / You can stay / Make yourself at home / Gotta go / This campaign / Don't run itself you know / You've got potential little parasite / I tie your hands so i can wish you well / Cuz i'm a gentleman and you are like / A caterpillar of the commonwealth / Gotta go / I said no / You need to know your role / Gotta go / I said no / It's all under control

Imposters (Little By Little) — The Fratellis

You wear your mask, I'll wear mine / They don't come cheap, but they fit just fine / You can be her and I can be him / We can both sink when the rest all swim / ... / We can pretend that our fates were entwined / A beautiful lie is the beautiful kind / Everybody knows that the sun still sets / And everybody gives and everybody gets / ... / I could be the one that you just can't shake / Till you swear that your eyes go blind / We can disappear till the sun burns a hole / In the life that we left behind

Sweet Painted Lady — Elton John

I'm back on dry land once again / Opportunity awaits me like a rat in the drain / We're all hunting honey with money to burn / Just a short time to show you the tricks that we've learned / If the boys all behave themselves here / Well, there's pretty young ladies and beer in the rear / ... / Forget us we'll have gone very soon / Just forget we ever slept in your rooms / And we'll leave the smell of the sea in your beds / Where love's just a job and nothing is said

Super Trouper — ABBA

Super trouper beams are gonna blind me / But I won't feel blue / Like I always do / 'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you / ... / So I'll be there when you arrive / The sight of you will prove to me I'm still alive / And when you take me in your arms / And hold me tight / I know it's gonna mean so much tonight

Babooshka — Kate Bush

She sent him scented letters / And he received them with a strange delight / Just like / His wife / But how she was before the tears / And how she was before the years flew by / And how she was when she was beautiful / She signed the letter / All yours...

Paris is Burning — St. Vincent

I write to give word the war is over / Send my cinders home to mother / They gave me a medal for my valor / Leaden trumpets spit the soot of power / They say, "I'm on your side / "When nobody is, 'cause nobody is / "Come sit right here and sleep / "While I slip poison in your ear" / We are waiting on a telegram / To give us news of the fall / I am sorry to report / Dear Paris is burning after all

Dream of Sheep — Kate Bush

Oh I'll wake up to any sound of engines / Every gull a seeking craft / I can't keep my eyes open / Wish I had my radio / I'd tune into some friendly voices / Talking 'bout stupid things / I can't be left to my imagination / Let me be weak, let me sleep and dream of sheep / Ooh, their breath is warm / And they smell like sleep / And they say they take me home / Like poppies, heavy with seed / They take me deeper and deeper

Hunger — Florence + The Machine

At seventeen, I started to starve myself / I thought that love was a kind of emptiness / And at least I understood then, the hunger I felt / And I didn't have to call it loneliness / ... / Tell me what you need, oh, you look so free / The way you use your body, baby, come on and work it for me / Don't let it get you down, you're the best thing I've seen / We never found the answer but we knew one thing / ... / And it's Friday night and it's kicking in / In that pink dress, they're gonna crucify me / Oh, and you in all your vibrant youth / How could anything bad ever happen to you? / You make a fool of death with your beauty, and for a moment / I forget to worry