Tumgik
#i have a lot of things i wanna start posting now :)
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Hello!
Something about @/demigod-jack-hearth
Something I wanna say about this post (with my reblog on it). I wanna give a side of a story. Mine to be exact.
They were one of the first people I talked to outside of rp. They were a close friend. But that fades.
I DONT WANT THEM TAGGED IN THIS I DONT WANT THEM TO KNOW ABOUT THIS. I HAVE THEM BLOCKED. IF THEY LEARN ABOUT THIS, IT IS BECAUSE SOMEONE SEND THIS TO THEM.
Tw: sa, strong language, I'm a little bitch, please please please read at your own risk
When start this by saying Jack worries me. I've seen so many post, rp or otherwise, where they bring up extremely triggering comments...just randomly. This has happened to me too. I don't get bothered by them I've been lucky enough to not deal with most and be comfortable with what I have dealt with. I think he needs professional help. Or to talk to someone that is an adult. This is difficult for some people. But there are free therapy websites out there. I have seen them. I have participated in them. The people on the other line aren't professionals but they are people willing to listen. And adults.
It started with when I saw an rp they had with camp Sky. I can't give screenshots of that but I do have some of confronting them.
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Now all good right? Yeah! I thought so too. Untill an anon confronts em.
Posts here and here
Oh...kay? What's wrong about this?
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Yeah...
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Actively calling out anon
Now mind me I thought they had buried this au deep deep into the ground. Wasn't until I opened Circe's blog that I realised they didn't. I was pissed. I had every reason to be. We have so few stories of male victims as it is and this 'au' was blatantly disrespectful to victims of all genders. I felt really fucking disrespected that's for sure.
Unfortunately I don't confront them. But I do vent.
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Now I feel bad for this. Maybe this was dirty laundry I shouldn't have aired out. But I was just so angry I couldn't think properly. I didn't mention Jack in this post, but friends figured it out. I won't say who these friends are for obvious reasons. Also, this is a bit wrong. They thought Odysseus cheated with only Circe, and Calyspo was SA. I got that wrong, and I admit it. I only remembered that when I scrolled up our dm to take a screenshot of it.
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Now I wanted to leave that convo because I wasn't in the mood for arguing, and I've learned to give people what they want, which makes em and yourself stop. My fault again.
Things happen. It leads to the apology. Now, obviously, I can't tell if an apology is genuine through a screen, and I am most certainly a pessimist. So, like, I don't think it is. Also, I'm almost certain that most was written by whoever the friend was who 'helped' em.
Sure, people can change, but not enough times do they actually. Just look on the Internet. And real life. A person like Jack, well, they've talked to me enough to know it is most likely not the case. If they were so angry at a piece of good criticism, then I don't have much hope.
Am I an angry person ? Yes. Do I think I have the right to be? Yes. Am I also a logical person? I believe so. The people I've asked think so, too. I don't dislike something for no reason. But I do dislike things. What I do like is reasons for my dislikes. With me so far?
Good. Moving on.
After the apology and after I finally got my thoughts in order, I sent them a message because they tagged me. A lot.
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This is what I sent. It's emotional, but in my opinion, it also makes sense. I was mad they lied to me. I was mad they twisted the story so. Fucking. Much. Odysseus isn't a rapist and Circe isn't an innocent flower. That is not what an AU is. What was their reaction to this? Nothing. To me at least.
A mutual friend told me they sent the last half of my messages and told them that they were angry I. Didn't. Thank. Them. For. The. Apology. Take that for what you will.
Now they made another post replying to the first anon who criticized them. I've read it. And when I tell you it is so fulled with self-pity-
I haven't collected my thoughts properly about this so this is bad and more emotion than the above. but this is the basic things behind it.
1) never directly addressing what he did and constantly tell em to read the apology. Don't wanna repeat yourself. How much time is it gonna take out of your day exactly?
2) not acknowledging the fact the male sa victim. At all. They don't say anything about it. No 'my condolences'. No 'I'm so sorry that happened to you' . Not acknowledging how terrible of a thing that is. At all.
3)says they aren't gonna defend themself... and defend themselves
4) have yet to tell us who these people are. Which is just bad cuz there are people out there who are okay with this. If they were IRL friends just say that.
5) it felt just fucking dull
Maybe this isn't right. Maybe you disagree with these points. But do not tell me you disagree with the rest.
I wanna end this by saying I am victim of SA. Did I tell him this? No. Maybe I should've. I don't feel comfortable sharing it. Because remembring fucking hurts. Remembering means crying and opening the lights and either sitting or laying down on my back because I can still. Fucking. Feel. It. And I was nine.
I don't want your pity on this. I don't want you to say sorry. The people you should be saying sorry to are the people who are not believed when this happens. Feel sorry for the people who cannot report this stuff because they don't trust the people who are supposed to protect them. Feel sorry for the people who think it was their fault and they actually wanted it when they didn't. 63% of rape are not reported in females. Only 12% of child rapes are reported.
I can't find a clear fucking statistics on males.
Do you know how difficult it is for males to have any representation at all? How many male victims do you see online? Even Odysseus being regonized as one is recent. Fucking. Stop. This is more than a made up story. It means the world to some people. So this actually happen. It might mean everything. This was taken away from them from so many retellings. And a stupid fucking au.
If you want to talk about SA, wanna make a character out of it, learn about it first.
So I'm not going to forgive and I am definitely not going to forget. You can. If you want. I don't care if you do. But I ask you not to forget. Please.
I am tagging Jack's taglist
@zariahthewitch @thegroovydaughterofhestia @if-chaos-was-a-boy @the-gods-strange-children @silena-daughterofaphrodite @fabulousdaughterofhecate @weakest-son-of-sun @chaos-pers0nified @neoptolemus-achilles-son @bast-the-best26 @goddess-of-bubblegum @hispanic-child-of-hermes @gaygirldoodles @luck-is-crucial @reyna4ever @vicious-daughter-of-zeus @feral-hermes-child @oopsies-i-did-a-thing @unfortunate-daughter-of-hestia @that-girl-cupid @ariathemortal @love-lightning-forethought @emdabitchass @kaiaalwayswins @champion-of-revenge @zoe-aura-of-d3ath @itsyourboyezra @lunar-eklipso-r @pink-koi-lovejoy @that-daughter-of-athena @sleepy-as-a-song @smileyalater @gellyhelio @daughter-ofthe-moontitan @demeters-daughter-is-done @the-smart-and-the-dumb-one @trinket-snatcher @creature-under-ur-bed @burnt-out-bitxhes @cloak-of-ares @heraaaaaaaa @unproblematic-hestia @i-was-never-sane
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lawrites · 1 day
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Oswald Cobb x Gender Neutral Plus Size! Reader
CW: NSFW, like HEAVY NSFW, descriptions of Oz's body and a little massaging of his club foot (the poor man deserves it), body worship, PLUS SIZE/FAT LOVE, and lots of blowing/cocksucking and dirty talk.
This is for the people who watched the first episode of the Penguin show and went "okay so...raise a hand if you wanna suck his cock?" Like I'm not joking this is mainly 2k words of Oz tummy worship and cocksucking. So...enjoy 😅. Ty to @finniestoncrane for encouraging me to post this lol
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You feel like you are in heat tonight. A voice snaps inside your head, asking what's wrong with you, but you brush it to the side. You can't tell if your reactions are due to Oz’s weeklong absence or if it's because he's being particularly doting towards you. Or…maybe it's his outfit.
Oz being out on business was always stressful, 1) because he is a criminal at the end of the day and he could never return again and 2) you are left to your own devices for a whole week. Sometimes he calls to see you through his security cameras, walking you through it and getting off on the other end, but it is never the same as having his hands, his voice in your ear, his tongue…
And his first night back, Oz has decided to forgo his usually very well-dressed image, instead opting for a white suit with a fitted purple shirt. It's casually done up so you can see his chest and a little bit of his belly, the dark hair that covers all of his skin on full display. To complete his look, Oz is wearing a nice, heavy gold chain, which sits directly at the point of his body where his tummy begins to round out.
You lost your mind when you first saw him, but kept your cool. The only thing that betrayed your initial feelings was your face turning red and your inability to meet his eyes, which Oz supposedly attributed to your choice of tight dress and nervousness to head to the Lounge with him. Thankfully he didn't pick up on or didn't comment on your pupils which had blown wide, and your slightly husky voice when you said you were ready to go.
Before you left out the front door, Oz grabbed you to his side, his thick fingers digging into the generous meat of your hip, and whispered in your ear, "I like this dress, Dove. You look so good for me tonight."
And now you find yourself at the Lounge, directly next to Oz as he schmoozes and smiles and charms those that come to ask him favors or update him on business. (You tease him about his Mob-boss like behavior, saying that he should just have them kneel down and kiss his ring at this point, with all the groveling he makes them do. He grins wolfishly in response to you calling him Don Corleone. “Sweetheart, I'm being nice to them by letting them leave with a little dignity here.")
Oz has gone from having you sit next to him, to laying a hand on your soft, plush thigh, to pulling you so close that you're almost on his lap. His strong hands dig into the softness around your waist, forcing you against him so your hands have to hold onto him for support and your head rests on his shoulder.
Leaning on Oz, he occasionally whispers sweet nothings in your ear and chuckles when they make you squirm in your seat.
"Who bought you that pretty dress, Bird? They have good taste."
"You're so soft against me, Dove. Driving a man to distraction over here."
"Want Daddy Oz to get you one of your fancy drinks, hmm? For bein' so good tonight?"
It's like you're possessed, you can't help it…your hands start to wander. Not too much, you don't want to make him nervous or be inappropriate, but Oz has never minded you reminding others that you're his.
First, when Oz has no business partners around, you slowly move a hand through the fuzz at the nape of Oz's neck, carding your fingers through his hair a bit farther up and making his eyes roll back. "Guh, that's the stuff, sweetheart. You treat me so nice."
Then, your other hand slowly inches down to rest just at the edge of where his shirt is unbuttoned. One finger extends to trace the seam, where it slowly, slowly inches so it is lightly running up and down the little sliver of tummy he is showing, right below his gold chain. You pick up the texture of his rough body hair against his soft, warm belly, and it makes you clench your thighs together. His breath hitches just slightly and Oz lets out a soft groan. "Just playin', Dove? Or do you intend to follow through?"
You look up at him, and Oz has to hold back a pained noise when you say, "I'll do whatever you want Oz. Been gone for so long, and you look so handsome tonight. Can't think."
Oz grins, still unused to a pretty thing like you giving him so much attention. "Yeah? You like this look? That why you're feeling up my chest?"
You stop your hand in its path, realizing that you had started fully running it up and down his hairy chest absentmindedly. You blush and pull it away, but Oz grabs your hand and brings it up to his lips. He coos at you, voice low "Pretty Dove, don't be ashamed. Just surprised that you're so handsy tonight." He leans over a bit so you can feel his breath against your neck as he whispers in your ear, "Where's my prim and proper birdie, huh? Flown away for the night? Left a sexy little thing like you in place?"
He nips your ear when he pulls back, making you whimper and squirm again in your seat. Oz takes you in hungrily, eyes roaming down your rolls and bumps on display as he presses you to him harder. "God, you do look good, kid. Decadent. So much for a man to grab and play with. Perfect for a guy like me." His hands dig into your hips, shaking the excess flesh there and taking in the way your body wobbles with dark eyes.
Oz looks at his watch, takes in his club, and then stands up, hauling you up with him. "Let's leave early, Sweetheart." You giggle and take his arm when he offers it, acting the gentleman even after his teasing words.
Heading back to his place feels like it takes forever, especially with Oz getting handsy. The driver closes the partition between you and the front as Oz’s rough hands pet up and down your body, pulling you all the way onto his lap. He gives you a mischievous grin as he brings you down against the bulge in his pants and grinds up into you, his eyes shining when you let out a soft whine.
But he keeps your pace slow, trying to edge and tease but not end anything too soon. You feel your eyes screw up as your body gets hot, letting out a groan of frustration as they open again to give him a pleading look. He lets out a sound like he's been punched, throwing his head back against the seat. "Can't look at me like that, makes me wanna just give you everything you want.”
A thrill moves through you, filling you with a tingling pleasure at the thought that you were so pretty you could make him do whatever you wanted, in this moment. But instead, you just give him a pleased grin paired with a blush that makes his heart skip a beat.
The driver taps on the glass, and the two of you hurriedly try to straighten your clothes as much as you can. Oz hands over a tip, and then you both turn towards his place. He limps behind you as fast as he can, trying to match your pace. Usually, he may feel insecurity over his leg at this moment, but instead he just thanks whatever fate allows him to get a glimpse of your ass and wide hips shifting and swaying as you take the lead.
As soon as you're through the doors, Oz pushes you up against them and kisses you. You both breath heavily and desperately try to take in as much of the other as possible. Separating, Oz presses his forehead to yours and shakily speaks, "Whatever you want tonight, Dove. I'll do it. You…you got me. I can't say no.”
The thought of bringing such a powerful man to his knees…it makes you whine and grind against his front. He bucks into you, his soft tummy pressing against your own. "O-Oz! I-"
He grins, realizing how flustered you already are. His fingers skim up and down your hips, lightly pressing into them, "Yeah? What's my Angel want, huh? You just gotta say it."
You pause and swallow heavily, trying to slow your racing mind and even out your heartbeat so you can think. The mind you're stuck with manages to form only one thought: "God, Oz...wanna suck your cock."
Oz blanches, but then grips your hips harder and grinds into you again involuntary. You whimper and grab desperately at his arms. Oz is breathier now, "F-fuck, bird. Whatever you want."
He starts to pull you behind him quickly, desperate to get to anywhere where you can kneel in comfort. Oz grips your hand harder as you see his office, bringing you through the wide doorway and shoving the doors closed behind.
He hurriedly walks to his desk, stealing a cushion from the couch as he goes and putting it on the ground for you. Impatiently, you wait for him to settle in his office chair, and then get on your knees immediately.
You look up, hands resting in your lap, and Oz groans at how good you're being for him. He hastily starts undoing his belt buckle, but fumbles a bit. You whine, "Ozzie…let me help."
Oz groans and holds his hands up, gesturing for you to get to work, and your hands dive in. They make quick work of his buckle and separate his belt, and then start unbuttoning, unzipping, even undoing his shirt, until his cock is free, so hard it's resting against his soft, fuzzy belly.
You almost drool. But then, you go a bit further. You move down his pants-covered legs and start to leave little kisses on his brace, making him draw in a shaky breath. When you get to his shoes, you carefully untie them, slowly and gently removing them until he is left in socks. Your clever hands start to knead and rub his club foot, making his eyes roll back and his posture soften almost instantly.
After a few minutes of massaging his poor foot, that he never lets anyone know is almost constantly in pain, his whole body is relaxed and his voice lets out occasional grumbles of praise. "Right there, Dove, yeah, that's the stuff."
Deciding that you've given him enough kindness for the night, your hands pull away. Oz's head raises up, and you almost giggle as his face screws into a confused look. "Why'd you stop, sweetness?" You do giggle now, "Oz, don't you remember why we are here in the first place?" And to remind him, you spit in your hands and Oz whimpers, "Dove, so dirty, where'd you learn that?"
But he doesn't get to speak more as they close around his length, your fingers gently tracing and running up the vein at the underside of his cock until he's panting, already leaking. You take time to gather a drop from his tip, sweetly looking at it on one finger before desperately plunging it into your mouth, groaning at his salty taste. Oz sees your thighs rub together and his eyes roll back, hands gripping his chair.
You lean forward when you're done, looking up at him and sweetly licking the tip of his cock with your pink little tongue, making Oz shiver and moan. "G-good, good job-fuck."
His praise makes you whimper, and that's when you decide to really go for it. You barely give him notice before your mouth is surrounding his tip, tongue laving around the head and making Oz shout out your name. Your mouth works down his length, using your fingers to spread out your own saliva and Oz's precum to allow you to move further down his length.
Oz is spewing obscenities, doing everything to keep from bucking into your mouth like some sort of teen who is getting his first blow, but it's difficult. His heart, his sweet bird, acting like a whore and begging to suck him off? Your sweet little mouth and hands working him so nicely? He's close already.
Vision starting to go black around the edges, you realize you have to breathe after being so obsessed with him for too long, and you pull back. Your lungs fill with big gulps of air and you can only taste and see Oz, his cock, his tummy…"So good. You taste so good. Wanna take you all the way now." Oz swears again.
He nods, out of breath, and you sweetly wrap your lips around his length and start opening your mouth wider, opening your throat, letting him slide in until your nose is pressed into his hairs and his gut is pressing into the top of your head. You whine, feeling him surround you, and your hand reaches down, pushing up your dress and playing with yourself. Oz looks down, sees your glazed over eyes and your drool around his cock, your plush body pressed into his leg, and hears your hand moving.
Oz bucks up, unable to help himself. "Fuck, Angel." You choke around his length, your throat muscles clench, and then he's finishing with a shout of your name. Sputtering, you're unable to even think about swallowing, allowing it instead to drip down your chin and onto your chest. Oz feels like he's in heaven and hell as his orgasm lasts a while, for him, groaning and throwing his head back and reaching for you. He clenches a hand in your hair and murmurs to himself “Mine, sweetness, God" around his moans.
When he comes back to Earth, he sees the mess he's made of you. His spend is pooling in the valley of your soft chest, and he groans and bucks up, his cock softening. "Dove, you killed me. You gotta stop it."
But his brain kicks in only a moment later, his eyes darkening and cataloging every part of you like he needs to remember it. "Fuck you look good, all covered in me." His hand reaches out, fondling your chest and making you moan and whimper as his cum starts to run down from where it had pooled and onto your dress, soaking it.
He fishes a handkerchief out of his pocket with his other hand blindly, loathe to stop playing with your chest or look away for a moment. Then he gently starts with your mouth, cleaning your chin and pressing a thumb to your lips, making you open for him. You do, of course, eagerly, gladly.
"You got messy, Sweetheart. Too eager for my cock, huh?" You nod and blush and he is on the cusp of getting hard again, your embarrassment after basically pawing at his cock making him feel obsessed in a way he only remembers experiencing around you.
He grins, but his eyes remain dark, like his mind is racing with vicious plans. “Well, fair’s fair, Dove. Gotta let me show you how a real man thanks you for a show like that, huh?”
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imustbenuts · 2 days
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nuts reading trigun in japanese 6 - kaite's foreshadowing. plant synchronization's downside
remember in my part 3 and 5 i was talking about hierarchy? surprisingly, it continues past chapter 8 with kaite. and wolfwood. triangulating nyoom
(to be honest... ive been doing these read and analysis completely blind in a 1st JP read through. so its possible ill find new nuances, get things wrong as the context shifts and changes, so my stuff looks like its scattered all over the place. sorry about that.)
i think ill start explaining names and meanings. kaite's name in japanese is kaito. カイト. this can be a homonym with i think 怪盗 (kaitou) in this case, which means phantom thief. for trying to help Neon with stealing loot from the Stand Steamer.
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left bubble next to neon: 道案内は的確だったかね!? I trust your guide has been giving you clear instructions?
^the headaches with manga translations has always been to keep texts short and reasonable for flow and readability, so these simplifications can and sometimes must happen.
but, add dakutens, the " on 2 of those カイト katakanas and suddenly, kaito turns into. ガイド gaido. Guide.
so Kaite has been playing as a guide to lead vash to his death at the hands of Neon. this page is such a fucking whammy with the wordplay going on. if you just read this in japanese theres a moment of "oh shit, no way, Kaite, vash just told you to stop betraying people! what the hell!"
yet theres a level of trust going on already, so its not as bad as it seems
nightow really likes his worldplay. i really like this page.
kaite redeems himself by later charging into the boiler room and helps turn the valve to stop the sand steamer from running off cliff and killing everyone on board....
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hm. a guide. and those sequences
we sure have a lot of guides here. one who appears in the manga later with a kansai dialect. and another in TriStamp, where he is younger than he appears.
when i spoke about hierarchy and the fact that vash is over 150, i was also kind of hinting that all of current humanity are akin to children in the system of JP hierarchy. that takes on extra meaning with a little change of context and language
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wolfwood is filling in the shoes of kaito here in tristamp. and within trimax, kaito foreshadows him. incredible.
theres actually more going on with wolfwood and certain design/changes choices i wanna talk about with tristamp but ill save it for another day. maybe when i run into him in this read later
Plant Synchronization downside.
....so theres a bad downside to vash synchronizing with the plant that i didn't catch. which also answers what the fuck was going on in tristamp when that version of him hits the ground
nightow mentions this in an interview, link here posted and transcribed by xoxo-otome (thank you!) that he likes action flicks and has incorporated a lot of action into his work. and its true. there is so much action in the form of sound effects.
reading through the entire manga and paying attention to the sfx peppered around offers a lot more context to whats happening in half of the panels that seemingly doesnt make sense
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like this one where the top panel has "DADADADADA" sfx. so they're stomping down the corridor with their guns crossed and facing each other. the "GO OH" in the bottom panel emphasizes the sudden burst into open air. unfortunately, anyone who values their life and sanity in this economy will not want to translate trigun's sfxs 100%.
i should have paid more attention when reading trigun in english. but i didn't so here i am. in the trigunbookclub tag now doing this.
why is it important? here. this. below. when vash does his plant thing with his sister:
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see those heart panels? i tried searching real quick but nobody seems to have pointed this out. i havent seen this in EN fanfics. maybe i missed it. maybe im stupid:
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thats Dokun, the sound effect of a heart thumping. as vash synchronizes, the heart panels with the same sound effect appear, but they gradually split apart further with ellipses "..." to signify his heart beat slowing down. and down. and down....
Dokun, do kun, do... kun....
then the wings comes out. and the panel below it:
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sfx: PIIIIIIIIIII
breathes. a FLAT LINE.
aaaaaaAA?!
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何かなんだかわかりません I'm not sure what's going on. とにかくプラントの動きは一切止まっています But the Plant's movement has completely stopped. 同時に男にも呼吸 心音ともに停止してます It's the same with that man. His breathing and heartbeat sounds like it's stopped with the plant too.
AAAAA?!!?! the も means vash is in the same state as the plant?
i.... um. um.,, ANYWAY-
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AAAAAAAAAAAA?! HUH?! HUH??? HUH?!
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is THIS why he has a metal grate over his heart? something happened and he an an operation on his heart???? by some engineer maybe? what? huh? am i reading this wrong? what? wait, hello? HEY!!!
what the fuck. okAY--?!
and then he just. pretends like nothing's happened. doesnt tell kaito anything. and he leaves the Sand Steamer.
and im going to have to sleep bc its 5 am now and pretend like i didnt just realize something this big right in front of my eyes during the first read.
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bixels · 9 months
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While I do think anon was rude, I do think it's pretty shitty to set up all this stuff you were going to add the au and then just drop it. It's disappointing. Definitely unfollowing.
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Bye.
#ask me#anon#once AGAIN.#I am not dropping anything#the au is not getting cancelled. more than likely i'm gonna take a break from it until i find motivation again#But I've been drawing the AU for half a fucking year#In that time I've only drawn 5 things that aren't mlp related#I'm getting tired and my last few posts didn't do as well as I'd hoped#And I'm not about to burn myself out on mlp au art even if I really do love making it#I'm still gonna make comics. I have a bunch of ideas.#Tulli and I still wanna do the limited run merch shop#Discord is still coming. Sunset is still coming. Sombra is still coming. I have so many ideas#But I need to do something else for my own sake. Did you know I was supposed to get the background 6 designs done by now#But I didn't because I'm TIRED#I've been keeping myself on a schedule to keep content pumping despite travel and school and family and I'm tired#what i'm getting isn't matching what i'm giving and that's nobody's fault. i'm not frustrated at anyone. a slump was bound to happen#drawing the au was fun until it become my Thing. Because when your Thing––your identity––starts to faulter#it can really make you freak out#And that's not healthy for the project or for myself. I need to find the fun again and I'm sure I will#I'm really appreciative of everyone's support in my inbox and replies it really does mean a lot especially given that about 2/3 of my#followers followed for mlp. But if you're gonna react to me saying “i'm gonna cool down on mlp art and draw my own stuff” with “i'm#disappointed in you." then Leave! I think it's good you're unfollowing#you are not obligated to stick by my side! But don't act like I'm doing you a disservice by turning my attention elsewhere#I didn't promise anyone anything and I definitely didn't say I'm breaking any promises.
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softerhaze · 1 year
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idk if it was the venus retrograde or what, but july 2023 was quite literally the worst month i've ever experienced in my life like.....every single day? awful? worse than the last? it's more likely than u think
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This. This. This entire conversation with Morrigan actually makes me want to sob. She and my Tabris always becomes close friends over the course of DAO; that, paired with the fact that my Tabris always romances Alistair, makes everything about this hurt so much more when you take DAO's ending into account.
Her confusion over why my Tabris didn't send her away. Why she didn't abandon her after they learned of Flemeth's plans. Why Tabris went out of her way to slay Flemeth and bring her the true grimoire. She asks Tabris why, and is baffled when the answer is, "I did it because I'm your friend," as if it's that simple.
The way Morrigan looks at the warden, the way her voice cracks when she says, "I want you to know that while I may not always prove... worthy... of your friendship, I will always value it."
She knows how this will end; Flemeth sent her with the wardens with the end goal of stopping the blight and obtaining the old god soul through the dark ritual. Morrigan knows that Alistair and Tabris are the only Grey Wardens here, and assuming they don't find more, one of them will have to die defeating the archdemon unless they agree to do the dark ritual.
With that context, her asking Alistair, "And what if a Grey Warden has forced to choose between the Warden he loved and ending the Blight? What should his choice be?" suddenly has so much subtext weaved through the words that I'm gonna start foaming at the mouth. She's practically telling Alistair that a warden has to die. She's scrutinizing his reaction to find any hint that suggests he would agree to the dark ritual in order to save himself and the woman he loves. And when he doesn't choose, she has her answer.
Morrigan made comments to Tabris about him, almost hopeful that their relationship was just a physical thing between them and not actually riddled with feelings... and then gives disapproval when Tabris says she loves him.
She doesn't want the warden to die; hell, she doesn't want Alistair to die, either; whether because she does actually care about him or because she knows it'll break her friend's heart if she loses him, or both!
Things would be so much easier if the only two Grey Wardens left to defeat the blight didn't fall in love, wouldn't they, Morrigan?
She knows that in the end, no matter the outcome, she will lose the woman she called sister and it's devastating.
Morrigan, who has never known true friendship. Who grew up isolated in the woods with an abusive mother and terrible implications for her future. Who discovered said mother planned to take over her body just as she did with her other daughters. Who doesn't understand kindness as it was rarely given to her without a catch. Who isolates herself from the others in camp. Who finally has a companion she cares about... and in the end, if her plan works and the dark ritual is completed, she'll end up pregnant and alone and wearing Tabris' resentment like a tender wound on her heart.
Or Tabris will reject the ritual, and will die to the archdemon.
Or her lover will.
I just- the dynamic between the warden, romanced Alistair, and Morrigan is so good and painful and rich that I'm gnawing on furniture as we speak.
#dragon age origins#dao#alistair theirin#dao alistair#dao morrigan#dao tabris#warden tabris#i'm replaying dao right now in case my recent written posts haven't made that obvious#the relationship dynamics the warden has with each of the companions is so so soooo good like there isn't a companion i dislike#i play into the slow burn with alistair's romance but it's not even just the romance aspect it's also their friendship too#playing dao and not romancing alistair would feel wrong at this point for me it's so crucial to the entire story and its development#and i love morrigan's friendship with the warden and how gutted tabris is when she comes clean about everything and offers the ritual#and then bails once everything is over and tabris is torn between hating her and feeling hurt and not wanting morrigan to be alone again#i talked more in depth about morrigan and the ritual in a previous post but it's a lot... especially when it comes to the witch hunt dlc#oh and then there's the friendship between tabris and zevran like don't even get me started on that sksksks i won't be able to stop#even a character like oghren who is the last person you'd think tabris would ever become friends with since he's y'know *oghren*#but i'll go on the record and say there's more to oghren that gets overlooked and overshadowed by his glaring flaws#and i don't wanna talk about leliana... she makes me too sad like ever since my last playthrough where i accidentally triggered her romance#while i was deep in alistair's romance i have a really hard time not reading into the things she says to tabris#in my last playthrough i dunno what i did but she confessed to tabris even though she was fully aware that tabris and alistair were togethe#and it was a *mess* okay like it really felt like we killed marjolaine and leliana was in a vulnerable position yet was hardened enough#to be like 'i know she and alistair are together but i'll take my shot anyway and attempt to break them up' like.... noooooo leliana D:#and the rest of the game it felt like she was bitter and still in love with tabris and i felt *horrible*#i just said i don't wanna talk about it but hhhnnngggg i'm taking extra precautions to not have a repeat of that this time#excuse my tag ramblings i'm just very passionate about dao and the companions okay#also want to note that this is my interpretation of morrigan's motivations based on how i play the game and my warden#so others might view this reaction and the warden/romanced alistair/morrigan dynamic differently and in that case#i would be interested to hear that different interpretations because those are always fun to read
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goobygnarp · 6 months
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#good grief im gettin a lil tired of seeing 'DONT DO THIS' kinda art videos#i very much understand its a youtube thing and that clickbait names and thumbs get the views and attention needed#but it doesnt mean it doesnt annoy me or that I cant be annoyed by it#sometimes i just see it in tutorial pictures too#but the large DONTS with red Xs near the supposed ''wrong'' way of drawing is so demotivating#people start and draw in many ways than one#its what makes art their own#but when videos or tutorial posts are made and show the ''WRONG'' way to go about it#its like scolding the new artist or long time artist with that style that they're doing it wrong and that its bad#no matter the intention its not the way to go about helping artists learn to draw#and in my personal opinion#the click bait ''DONT DO THIS WHEN DRAWING'' thing is what keeps me from actually watching the vids#i get theyre probably helpful but i don't like that I have to feel some NEED or DESIRE to click on a vid cause I feel like I did a thing#wrong or that i never should have done it at all#i wish i could see more 'here are some tips that helped me#kinda vids cause yes i would love to learn what helped you rather than being or feeling wronged for drawing in a way that isn't theirs#im rambling but i have been seeing a lot of 'DONT DO THIS' NEVER DO THIS' 'IF YOURE DOING THIS STOP NOW' kinda art vids#im speakin for myself here#but im an artist sifting through art youtube or spaces always willing to learn new ways of improving my art#i dont need to feel click baited like the next 3am don't this kid to learn how to improve my inking skills#if it was more a 'this is my personal preference and I wanna share it with my audience and maybe teach some things' kinda vid#id watch that too#but im just so tired of seeing art youtube going down this need to tell folks 'YOURE DOING IT ALL WRONG. THIS IS THE RIGHT WAY"
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cerise-on-top · 8 months
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Haiii! I love your work :D
Could you possibly do a gaz x reader? When him and reader are celebrating their anniversary:), that would be really cute :’))
Hello! Thank you, I hope this is enjoyable as well! I went with a more fluffy route this time, I just wanna see Gaz happy and healthy and as far aways from any and all danger as possible! This request was really cute, I love Gaz! I'm glad there are several of us who do! Though I think I went a bit overboard with this, but how could I not when people are requesting best boi!
Celebrating Your Anniversary with Gaz
For the sake of this request, we’re gonna go with the idea that Gaz was able to be with you during your anniversary and didn’t end up being somewhere in the world, having to fight tooth and nail for his survival. We’re gonna go the fluffy route with this!
His memory is really good, Gaz would never forget something as important as your anniversary. Doesn’t matter if you’re together, doesn’t matter if you’re married. He has it memorized, he wrote it down on his phone, he noted it on several loose papers lying around just about anywhere. Trust me when I say he’s the last person to ever forget something like this. Although he would appreciate it if you remembered as well, he’d probably love it even more if, just once, you forgot about your anniversary, that way he could properly surprise and absolutely spoil you rotten. He wants to make your anniversaries days you can remember, so he will tailor them to your liking. You like going to arcades or amusement parks? A bookshop date? You just wanna go to McDonald’s? It’s all yours, and don’t you dare even think about paying, your wallet will not be strained on such a holy and sublime day.
The day would start off simple. You’d sleep in, if you can, cuddling for as long as possible, until one of you needs to get up for whatever reason. He’ll nuzzle into you, holding you as close to him as possible. He wants you to feel his warmth, how alive you make him feel, he wants you to feel how his heart beats for you and only you. Gaz has a beautiful voice, it’s fairly low and very calming to listen to. He’d hum your favorite tune that’s a bit calmer. He wants you to be as relaxed for him as possible, maybe even fall asleep in his arms again, even if he definitely wouldn’t mind you staying up to chat a bit with him as well. He’s gonna be all over you, making sure to touch you wherever he can so you feel secure with him. And when you’re drifting off to sleep again, that’s when his plan begins.
Gaz will plant a kiss on your neck or your forehead, whatever he can reach as he excuses himself to the bathroom. However, this sly dog will actually head for the kitchen to make you some breakfast. He’s a good cook, so whatever it is you like, he’ll make it. French toast? Scrambled eggs? Eggs and bacon? Your wish is his command, even if you never uttered a single order. He just hopes you won’t wake up or, even if you do, will at the very least stay in bed. This breakfast isn’t for you to enjoy in the kitchen or the living room, you’re to eat it in your bed. He even got you a nice tray so he can carry it to you without making a mess. Orange juice and all. You will be spoiled.
It’s then that he’ll wake you with another soft kiss to your temple, maybe shaking you awake a bit, so you can enjoy your breakfast together. Might even feed you a bit, just to be embarrassingly cute while he’s at it. The more content you look, the better. Afterwards, he’ll leave for the kitchen again, putting the tray away and decorating the living room a bit. There will be the most gorgeous roses you’ve ever seen in a vase, alongside several other flowers, each of which tells of a different kind of adoration. And when you finally follow suit and spot the flowers, he’ll just smile and claim that they looked very pretty. If you understand flower language, then you can tell he just really wanted to say he loved you in as many different ways as he could.
It’s then that he’ll ask you to get ready for the day, to brush your teeth and hair, and put on some clothes. You don’t need to look particularly fancy, he wants you to be as comfortable as you could possibly be. This is when he’ll take you to a place you like which, as mentioned before, could be just about anything. Waterpark, roller skate rink or just a lovely walk in the park, he’s open for everything. You will be accommodated accordingly. Those places are where you’ll be spending the majority of your day, grabbing something simple to eat for the time being, such as some fries or maybe some toast at a good cafe or pub.
When day meets night, he’ll take your hand in his, taking you to a fancy restaurant you’ve been to a few times. Preferably one where the both of you can look down at the city and see all the beautiful lights it has to offer. You’ll spend another two hours or so there. At the very least, you’ll be there until it gets dark, eating good food, having a good drink, maybe some wine as well. It doesn’t matter what you choose, all Gaz wants is to see the twinkling city lights dance in your eyes afterwards. When the evening is starting to roll over into night, he’ll take you to a ferris wheel. A big one where you can see the entire city from.
He’ll watch you as you excitedly look everywhere, taking in as many sights as you can, hoping that the ferris wheel stops at just the right time. Ideally, that would be right at the top. But he won’t be too picky if it’s somewhat to the side as well. As long as he gets to see your mouth agape at all the pretty lights, he’s content. While the ferris wheel stops, he’ll shoot his shot. If you’ve been together for a few years but aren’t married yet, he’ll propose to you. If you’re already married, he’ll still get down on one knee, take your hand in his and kiss its back tenderly, like a knight in shining armor. It’s embarrassingly sweet, but he knows no one but you is going to see it, so he does it anyway. You’re royalty in his eyes, you’re his to protect and care for, and he needs to show his loyalty however he can. Once he’s done kissing your hand, he’ll get up, holding your hand still and pulling you up with him, just so he can hold you close once again. Another tender kiss to your lips, and then he’ll get out a small box. Either the proposal ring or, if you’re married already, he’ll gift you a lovely little necklace made of pure silver. Something you can wear that will always remind you of him.
Once you’re down on the ground again, he’ll take your hand in his and lead you home, conversing with you about how much he loves you, how happy he is to have you in his life and how he hopes he gets to spend many, many more years like that with you.
If it’s not too late yet, you might watch a movie and cuddle on the couch. But you’ll likely both be tuckered out after today and just snuggle up in bed, ready for the next day.
And this is how Gaz’ ideal anniversary would go.
#cod#cod x reader#kyle gaz garrick#kyle gaz garrick x reader#gaz x reader#I wish I could gift Gaz a small music box that plays “You Are My Sunshine” I think that would be a cute gift#I have a music box that plays “Over The Rainbow” which I think is also very sweet#I think I might wanna start collecting music boxes they're just so very lovely#now that's a hobby I can also get behind! a lovely little tune that could calm down just about anyone!#maybe even put someone to sleep as well#I still remember one of the first things I ever wrote and posted here. The Batter and the Music Box#I wish I had the time to write something like that for my favorite lads and lasses as well#whew this is almost 1.300 words long which is surprising since I wanted to go for 800-ish#but I read Gaz and my brain short circuited he was my favorite when watching the campaign#I did start watching the mw reboot for him and Valeria but I stayed for him and Valeria#mw1 was the best one out of the three in my opinion. and now I'm watching the og mw when I can :-)#og Soap and Ghost are a funny little duo. I love the little hackerman Ghost so much! though I wanna know where the joke of him breaking#so many laptops came from! it's cute but I always thought he was good with technology :o either way I like to imagine talking about IT#stuff with everyone and being good at it and helping them! IT is fun I like it a lot :-)#either way thank you for the request! this one was also an absolute delight to write! love me some good natured fluff and Gaz :D
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creative-hanyou-girl · 9 months
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I don't know if anyone else feels this way but I think a big reason why I'm so chill about the changes made to the PJO show from the books is because I kind of look at each other as their own seperate canon.
Like, I read a lot of anime and manga, and anime adaptations have a huge habit for changing plot points for various reasons, and as a fan of said anime and manga, I've found that I can enjoy both versions of the same story even with the differences when I look at them as their own universe or canon. That's not to say I don't want them to be faithful or true to the source material, but if a scene or situation plays out differently for a logical or entertaining reason, than I can still appreciate that deviation from the manga even if I still like the other original version of that part more. And I can even like the reversal way if I feel an anime does something better than even the manga. But if I want to, I can look at certain moments as more canon than others because I got 2 different versions of that same scene or moment.
And, I don't know, I kind of apply that reasoning to the PJO series as well, mainly with the books, the show, and even the musical (not the movies put that right back where it came from). So far I'm loving the TV show, and while I miss some of the things they changed (like the pink poodle), this adaptation really is doing a great job with staying true to the heart and spirit of the original book that I personally am not even really bothered by the changes, especially when I remember that the books will always still be there with it's own version, or canon, of events.
Like, I will say 1 thing I adore in the books that isn't really in the show is the fact that a lot of Percy and Annabeth's "rivalry" during TLT has more to do with the rivalry between Poseidon and Athena. I just really like on how this adds a level of "forbidden friendship/love" to their relationship 'cause I personally eat the forbidden relationship trope up, especially when it's done well like with Percabeth.
Yet, even if this isn't really the reason percabeth have beef with each other in the show, I can still appreciate and enjoy that according to the show's canon, they have issues because they genuinely have problems with each other as actual people rather than their parents' rivalry, because at the end of the day, that's the PJO TV show canon, and I can always turn to the books for that version of Percabeth's "rivalry", as that is the PJO book canon.
Same goes for the characters too. I will always have and love my dark haired Percy and blond haired Annabeth in the books, but I can also welcome and love Walker's Percy and Leah's Annabeth from the show. And so far, they along with Aryan are KILLING IT as those characters.
I can love both versions of the characters.
I can love both versions of the same story.
I can look at both versions as they own seperate canon or mix them together if I so wish too (especially since both versions of PJO are written by the same guy)
And that's ok. The adaptation doesn't have to be a complete copy of the books. It doesn't have to have things play out eactly the same way. The characters don't have to look exactly the way they are described as in the books. And that's ok. I will still always have the books to love and appreciate, but I can also start to love and appreciate the new adaptation for it's new spin and twists to the same story that sets it apart as it's own canon while still staying true to the spirit of its predecessor.
Anyway, sorry if I'm not making a lot of sense. I just think the people complaining about the changes in the show are looking at it all the wrong way. The show has it's own canon just as the books have their own canon, or even the musical. At the end of the day, isn't that kind of cool to have different versions of the same story and characters? Doesn't it give you so many more options to look at the story in different ways that you can prefer or choose from? Doesn't it give you new versions of canon that you choose from? And really, as long as the PJO adaptation, or any adaptation for that matter, stays true to the heart and spirit of the original story and characters, do the changes made really matter?
#anyway sorry for the long post#I've just been seeing a lot of people complaining about the PJO making changes from the books and I thought I give my 2 cents#& I thought about how the show dies make enough changes to certain events or plotpoints that you could look at it as its own seperate canon#and how that actually is kind of cool as it gives us another version of the same story and characters#it's actually really neat to have different versions of the same story ya know#its like. if I ever want the Percabeth that has more of a 'forbidden relationship' thing going on. there's always the book canon to fall on#likewise if I want the percabeth where they're rivals because they have genuine issues w/ eachother. there's the TV show. ya know?#and if I want the Athena that I can at least somewhat believe might actually care for Annabeth. there's the book canon#whereas if I want the Athena I straight up wanna strangle from the getgo. I now got the TV show for that😊#same with the characters descriptions#I personally still imagine Percy and Annabeth as they are described in the books#but I am positvely loving Leah and Walker's portrayal of TV Percy and Annabeth so much. especially in these last few episodes.#and don't get me started on how much I love Aryan as Grover. he's the GOAT (literally🤭)#anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk#I just think its neat that Ive now got 2. even 3 versions of PJO canon that I can love together and individually at my disposal now#and I just think the people who are complaining about the show aren't seeing it that way and that's why they're whining about changes#like. chill guys. we still have the books. but now we also the show and musical to give us new versions of the same story and characters#and is that not amazing when you think about it?#percy jackson series#percy jackson and the olympians#percy jackson tv show#percy jackson#percy and annabeth#athena#annabeth chase#grover underwood#book vs show#percy jackson books#percy jackson musical#percabeth
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cerealmonster15 · 3 months
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the block button isnt enough i need to set things on FIRE
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itacestians-unite · 7 months
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itacest fae au
people seemed really interested about the itacest fae au last time i talked about it so... i have more to share. here's one plot point i had planned that i may or may not write as a one-shot.
tw for (nonsexual) dubcon
in my au, faeries are actually really uncanny looking. they just don't look right. their cheekbones are too sunken in and their eyes are too far forward in the skull, and have too much of a twinkle to them to look quite human. it's scary.
(fae) feliciano of course uses glamour to make (human) lovino view him as irresistibly attractive, so lovino just thinks he's this hot faerie guy thing who he can't stay away from (unaware he's been charmed and has no choice in the matter)
antonio is a faerie, too, and long story short he's the leader of a revolution, and because feliciano is the child of one of the royals in their realm, he goes after lovino for reasons i forget (but they're in my document somewhere)
antonio attacks lovino but feliciano steps in and fights for him, but all the fighting has him weakened, causing the charm he set on lovino to collapse and for lovino to see him for how he really is.
lovino is horrified and runs away. later, he meets feliciano again in front of a river. feliciano has healed enough to recast the glamour & the charm, but glamour doesn't show in the water's reflection. he was careful around water before for this reason, but since there's nothing left to hide, he goes and sits next to lovino, exposing his true face once again.
since lovino is aware of it all, the charm on him is weaker now, and he's unsure how much is his true feelings and how much is him being toyed with.
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quirkle2 · 6 months
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oh nooo that's quite a bummer :( but i'm very glad that i helped brightening up your day :") tbh your writing brightens up my day too (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)
AND WAIT I'VE BEEN ACTUALLY QUITE THINKING ABOUT WHETHER ZOMBIE MOB HAS FOUGHT OFF A ZOMBIE WHEN I ASKED IF HE HAS EVER BITTEN SOMEONE and since you brought it up, well, would be okay to ask about the details of how it went 👁️👁️ (also him fighting off a fellow zombie to protect tome got me sobbing)
- 🪻
aww im glad my silly little words brighten ur day!! ur so sweet :]
and yes, it went horribly <3! tome prolly wasn't paying attention as closely as she should've been and got herself surrounded by a crowd. to be clear, that's not Always dangerous, since zombies arent like,, after ur brains in this constantly. but these zombies did look quite hungry, and human or not, she looked like a good meal,,
she had wandered off a bit from mob n ritsu, but mob heard the commotion first. tome has a big fucking baseball bat in this au that she likes to swing around, but a baseball bat can only get u so far in terms of self defense. she thins the horde but there's simply too many of them
mob lets exactly One zombie grab her and yank her toward them before he goes ballistic
watching zombies fight is a lot closer to watching wild animals fight than anything else, and it gets quite horrid sometimes. since their bites aren't rly "dangerous" to each other beyond the typical Oh No a Chunk of Flesh is Gone (not even painful for them, since their nerves r.. less than functional), the fight is a lot more close up and gruesome than a fight against a zombie and a human would be. humans usually back away from zombies immediately and try not to touch them at all in fear of getting bitten; zombies don't need to care abt that
most of the horde realizes that this meal isn't going to be easy and they wander off, but a few more hungry, more desperate ones try to rip into mob's throat at the first sign of defiance. it's not exactly a fair fight; it's like 1 against 4, so he's sorta bound to lose
thankfully ritsu shows up and shoots two of them down (he's Terrified of shooting mob by accident, but either way he'll probably die, so) and tome gets the last one with a good swing to the head. ritsu rushes to mob and is horrified by the amount of blood dripping from his neck and his arm; tome is equally as shocked, but she's mostly thinking, "ive Never seen a zombie defend a human before"
mob's neck is thankfully mostly just scraped up and clawed, but there Is some gruesome punctures where canines sank in and tugged. it's a lot worse along his arm that's bitten and gouged beyond belief. he loses a lot of blood here, but the whole nerves-no-longer-work thing is a blessing in disguise atm; he'd be in a lot of pain otherwise. while ritsu and tome are patching him up w shaky hands he simply glares beyond their shoulders like he thinks he's still in danger, even when they tighten the bandages. it's like he barely notices what they’re doing
his strangely alert behavior makes them think abt the possibility that maybe mob Knows he could've easily been shredded apart there, and he's a little scared and worked up abt it. the only reason he managed to fight as long as he did without dying is prolly bc the other zombies weren't as well-fed as mob—they were kinda weak and shaky from days of no food, but mob has humans taking care of him and keeping him fed 24/7
they're all shaken up by it pretty good.. tome is still reeling from the fact that mob defended her so valiantly, and ritsu is quietly horrified by the idea of another zombie killing mob instead of a human. he doesn't know which is worse
#qktalks#anon#zombie au#this isn't the first time ritsu has had to kill a zombie btw ^#this is just the first time he's had to kill one since he started seeing zombies in a different light#it was either letting his brother die or killing a zombie. ritsu's upset that he had to make that decision at all#but he's not afraid to say that the decision was incredibly easy to make#it sucks that he had to kill one but . for mob ? literally anything goes#ritsu checked tome over after they took care of mob too. tome's very surprised when he's rly gentle abt it#ritsu's been known to .. lose his head a little in moments of stress#and sometimes he snaps at tome bc of it. he never means to he's just..worked up#but this time he's kinda fretting over her and it opens her eyes a little bit#ritsu has indeed grown to care abt tome a lot. they bicker Most of the time but it's usually not very serious#in all the excitement tome just hadn't rly realized that until now. ritsu is so high-strung that it's hard to get a read on his softer side#but now he's not just directing his softer side to his brother‚ but to tome as well#i have 15 more tags to explain smth i wanna make clear btw let's hope i don't start rambling abt smth else entirely#so i've been using a lot of vocabulary in these au posts that hint toward mob being ''special'' or ''abnormal'' in his behavior#he is not special or abnormal in any way#Every zombie is like that. every zombie has a personality‚ and a gentler demeanor hidden behind that desperate starvation#and remnants of their past selves in there somewhere#mob is simply one of the only zombies that have been taken in and cared for and treated like a sick person rather than a monster#as i've said before most people just.. either run away or shoot them between the eyes when crossing paths with a zombie#they don't give any of them a Chance. mob is a very very lucky zombie.#he is healthier than most other zombies and he is treated far better#and the way ritsu constantly talks to him is actually great for his health ! gets those rusty gears in his head rollin#exercises that brain‚ even if‚ to ritsu‚ he's only responding in odd gibberish#that's only one of the things ritsu gives him that other zombies never receive in their lifetimes#i'd say mob prolly ? has one of the longest ''zombie lifespans''#most zombies either die of starvation‚ dehydration‚ or sleep deprivation within a few weeks#he's lived a long zombie life !
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starlooove · 11 months
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My batfam gender sexuality hcs 🥰🥰🥰🥰:
Bruce: cishet he/him
Dick: cishet he/him
Jason: cishet he/him
Tim: cishet he/him
Steph: butch lesbian to ME! She/her but she’s trying out she/they and doesn’t know how to feel. Might fuck with neos but she’s not ready to take that step yet.
Cass: think early on in accepting that she’s a human being she’d psychoanalyze the fuck outta herself to see where she fits in and be super super super pressed about the entire thing to a detrimental point but as she progresses she’ll be fine. Lesbian, and she’s pretty sure she’s a girl most of the time sure 😄.
Duke: I think he knew he was not straight since he was young (moonlight opened his eyes and broke his heart) but he never really questioned his sexuality at all. The problem is that he doesn’t question it because the idea of gender roles (girls do this. Boys do that.) is so engrained in his mind that it’s not even something he thinks can be changed, if that makes sense? Anyways I don’t think he’s the type to get dysphoria he moreso experiences euphoria when exploring his gender identity. I think he would realize he has different views on his own gender when he sees other people expressing their own differently. Like genuinely he goes to school and sees another boy wearing lipstick and his brain blows up. As of this very moment he’s “exploring” but he’s actually a lil scared to genuinely confront himself about this and uses “there’s bigger problems in the world” to get out of it. End goal is non-binary but for now he’s at the veeeeeeery tail end of questioning.
Damian: I think at the moment Damian’s just not thinking about any of that but it’s in the opposite of duke; he knows he’s probably some kind of queer, both in sexuality and gender, but it’s just. Not top priority for him at the moment. I wanna bring up clothes rq bc, extra hc time, in MY mind Damian does express himself a lot through his clothing and getting to the manor made him a bit shy when it came to skirts and dresses. Seeing the way boys, and especially black and brown boys, who explore their femininity are treated, he just doesn’t mention it at all and the scenario never comes up. He gets more comfortable as time goes on though and later on gets bold enough to wear a dress to an event. He’s stonefaced but slightly regretting it till some younger kid sees him and is awe stricken, like stars in his eyes and asking if he can do that too. Damian feels better about it and resolves to wear whatever he wants more often. I don’t think he ever comes out in big big way (he’d tell the people closest to him but everyone else can just figure it out) but he genuinely doesn’t feel the need to label himself at all.
#the way y’all do Duke and Damián in these hc posts….#Steph I wanted more for you truly but sorry ur unfortunately white#u get more than the boys but today ain’t about you 💔#I WILL say buzzcut steph true#and she’s black in MY mind so in MY mind stud steph true#Cass I have a lot of thoughts about#like for me early on in her lil suicidal era I think she’d find the whole labelling thing complicated and stupid#but surface level deep inside she likes that idea of community but she doesn’t think she deserves it and it burns her#post trying to kill herself with Bruce’s full support#she throws herself into the idea of this community but she kinda like. wants a good grade in being queer as opposed to truly exploring-#-herself. comes to head when she just breaks like crying screaming throwing up and Steph is like ‘why do you even wanna do ts anyways’#and cass doesn’t have an answer#she starts looking inwards and kinda. sets it up as a yes/no question tree for herself and lands with knowing she’s a lesbian but nothing#really concrete about her gender and she’s actually ok with that#imo she ends up with mirror pronouns#as in whatever you call yourself you can call her#I want it to be that earlier she was suffocating herself for others approval but now she’s allowing for vulnerability in a way that serves#her and her alone. this is in the tags and not the post bc y’all are actually pretty ok when it comes to cass in them hcs.#and I wanted the main focus to be on the black and brown boys since y’all always do them dirty 🙃#and just to be mean#Bruce wayne#tim Drake#dick Grayson#Jason Todd#Duke Thomas#damian wayne#cassandra cain#Stephanie brown#btw bringing back my Joey soft adopting damian agenda: damian absolutely made sure Damian knew he could do whatever he wants. Damian’s not-#-used to feeling hesitant about this kinda thing but he’s double embarrassed and joey says he’ll wear the damn thing with him. he does
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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#hello to anyone who happens to b interested in the saga of my life... also maybe the irl person i gave my url to... hopefully my blog#didnt freak her out too much lol. anyway so its been a busy week? 2 weeks? month? year? life? its been a lot. my parents helped me move#across the country from the desert to somewhere that's beautiful and green. my dad is so jealous of me lol its so so so pretty and theres s#so much to do. will i do any of it? that remains to be seen but im gonna try to be better about that sort of thing. try to get some help#with the thoughts in my head that keep me from doing and enjoying most things. its weird like im decorating my new room which i love. the#location and living situation seem ideal and i really hope i can stay here all 5 years of my program but i was picking a lot of bright#colors and now it feel uncomfortable. like if i wear things that r too bright or my room is too bright without dark contrast it feel weird#like if im wearing it it kinda makes me feel sick. idk what thats abt. anyway. ill try to heal my brain and im just so happy to b out of the#southwest. i was so so so excited when we were leaving thr city and even more so when we left the state. i cant believe im here. in December#it felt like a million years away and i really truely could not fathom how i was gonna survive that long. my thoughts were so distorted. but#i did and here i am. and in like a month i should b starting my phd program and my parents were telling me how excited ppl r for me and#jealous of where im living and im glad. im glad they're excited. i think i am too but its under a layer of: if i get excited it wont happen#im not allowed to b excited or it wont happen. which is irrational but ya kno. anyway so that's yeah. im so happy to have a fresh start and#the town seems super cool. a liberal blip in a sea of... not that so theyre very visibly pride forward haha and i think itll b way easier#for me to get around without driving. and im gonna try to make friends. i need someone to tell me where to get tattoos haha. so yea im happy#but exhausted and i dont wanna go back to work and so so greatful to my parents for being wonderful ppl idk how bc both of them had fucked#up childhoods. like my mum will say the saddest shit and im like bro this is y i don't wanna talk to my grandma fuck her and my dads parents#r so fucked. like my nana is the reason im so fucking control freaked out but i kno i have issues and she has no insight and thinks shes#better than everyone. anyway hopefully i can get back to drawing a posting more now. ive been drawing it its been in a sketch book#like an actual sketch book for sketching big ideas thst r gonna take fucking forever to draw 😭#so that's all. just uprooted my whole life. thats all. but in a good way :-]#unrelated
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the-kipsabian · 2 months
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maybe instead of wrestling bracelets tonight im gonna make some alan wake ones
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gemharvest · 20 days
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Hmmmmm I might be developing facial hair. Which like, the gender euphoria of that aside, I might have to bring this up to my mom cuz idk. Idk if this is a sign of something I should have checked out or not.
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