#i have no motivation to do literally anything. not to play games or write or draw or create or do anything i moderately enjoy

[berrymarkie]

gamer | l.hc

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genre : smut

warnings : fingering , spanking , hair pulling , multiple creampies , unprotected sex

hiii everyone! im so sorry for literally disappearing for a whole month. 😭 i just lost motivation for a while but i wanna start writing again! unfortunately, i lost access to most of the requests i received over the last month due to my own lack of experience using tumblr. i am still fairly new to the app so i am still learning how to navigate my drafts, requests, etc.

any new requests would be greatly appreciated!

well, this is nice. you come to visit your boyfriend and instead of you occupying his time, it’s a computer game. what could possibly make a game so fun? you swear he’s been playing for hours at this point, rarely even taking glances in your direction. you haven’t seen eachother in a week and he’s acting like he couldn’t care less about your presence.

“hyuck” you sing out, as you crawl to the end of the bed to be closer to where he sits. he hums in response, not even looking at you. “wanna cuddle?” you ask while giving him puppy dog eyes.

he looks at you for a moment and then turns to the screen again before speaking. “you know i’d love that. but, there’s a time limit on me getting this super rare gun.”

a gun? seriously?

“you can’t cuddle for just a little bit?” you whine dramatically. he chuckles and shakes his head. “im sorry, baby.”

you sigh and crawl back to the middle of the bed. laying down on the fluffy blanket you were previously wrapped in. you open your phone and start scrolling mindlessly, hoping to pass time so maybe haechan could finally give you attention.

you find yourself going through your camera roll, more specifically your videos. most of them being of your dog, sometimes pretty scenery outside. you come across one video in particular, a video haechan took on your phone.

shit, you look so pretty like this. want me to fuck you, hm? my pretty girl is so wet for me.

the audio plays quietly from your phone, just loud enough for you to hear over the sound effects on haechan’s game. you quickly swipe to the next video and see his face, his bare shoulders glistening with sweat as he roughly thrusts into you, his hair sticking to his sweaty forehead. he looked perfect, so handsome.

great, not only are you wanting to simply talk with haechan, but now, you’re also horny. now craving something he most likely doesn’t want to give at the moment.

you want his attention, and you want it now. you decide to take off a few layers, hoping to maybe catch his eye. you crawl over to the edge of the bed and lay on your stomach. wearing just your bra and panties, you prop your ass up a bit higher, hoping he’d see that first if he glanced at you.

“what are you doing?” he asks, not looking away from the screen. “im not doing anything, why?” you say, making yourself sound way more innocent than you are.

“oh really? then why are you half naked, staring at me.” he chuckles and finally looks at you, taking in sight of you. “uhm, it got hot? i think you’re looking into things too much, hyuck.” you coo at him and blink cutely.

“am i now?“ he shakes his head, his jaw slightly tightening. “mhm, you’d better get that gun anyways. it sounds… exciting.” you say softly, trying to fight back a stubborn smile.

he clicks his tongue and looks at you again, shaking his head and chuckling. you look back at him, raising your eyebrows. he suddenly gets out of his chair and sits down on the bed, pulling your legs across his lap, ass up.

“what are you doing? don’t you have a time limit?” you ask, your voice filled with fake urgency. “oh shut up.” he growls and spanks your ass roughly. you yelp and bury your face into the fabric of his sweatpants.

he rubs your ass before laying another slap across it. “you wanted it this bad?” he asks, his voice a bit deeper than usual. you don’t say anything in response, just shutting your eyes tightly.

you feel him pulling your panties off of you quickly, leaving yourself feeling a bit more vulnerable than before. he spreads your legs on his lap before slapping the back of your thigh gently. “you all worked up, hm?” he teases.

“hyuck…” you breathe out weakly. he hums softly and rubs his finger along your slit. he spreads the wetness all over your pussy before slowly pushing a finger inside you. you whine at the sudden action, hands moving to his free arm in front of you to grip on it gently.

“so wet. it’s all for me, right?” he whispers. you nod your head quickly in response. “talk to me, baby.” he says softly, starting to slowly move his finger in and out. “okay” you whimper and grip onto his hand tightly, your hips starting to squirm a bit.

he lets go of your hand and holds you down with his whole arm, not letting you move anymore. he starts to curl his fingers every time they go into you, speeding up the pace a bit more.

a soft moan escapes from your lips as he hits a certain spot inside you. “oh, did that feel good?” he asks and repeats the action, this time rougher than before, causing your legs to tremble. he repeats this a few more times before adding a second finger, stretching you out a bit.

“please don’t stop.” you whimper softly as your back arches. “oh i don’t plan on it.” he chuckles and continues to finger you. he starts to move his fingers in at an angle, causing them to hit that same spot perfectly.

loud, wet, squelching noises can now be heard in the room, mixing with the lobby music of the game still running on haechan’s computer. you whimper softly with each push of his fingers, you close your eyes tightly.

“im close.” you pant out as your whole body starts to shake. he starts moving his fingers faster, pushing them into your g-spot nonstop. his free hand moves to your clit, rubbing quick but steady motions.

“cum for me.” he says gently. you moan softly as you feel a familiar tightness in your stomach. you clench around his fingers as you feel yourself coming undone. his fingers don’t stop moving inside you, fucking into you roughly as you cum on them. your legs start to shake even more than they were before, he slowly pulls his fingers out after you completely finish.

he grabs your face gently to make you look at him. he then starts to lick his fingers clean, savoring the taste of you on his tongue. your breath quickens at the sight.

“hyuck.” you whimper softly, he smiles and pulls you to sit up, making you sit on his lap. he grips onto your hips tightly, making you grind into him slowly, your wetness seeping through his sweatpants.

“do you want me to fuck you?” he asks, rubbing one of your thighs while continuing to grind against him. you nod quickly, biting your bottom lip while looking at him. he shakes his head and pushes your hair away of your face.

“you can speak, you know? use your words.” he teases. you breathe in slowly and look at his lips, “yes, i want you to.” you breathe out slowly. he nods and tilts his head to the side. his hand moves from your side up to your chest, gently squeezing your boob through your bra.

“please, i need you.” you whimper softly while looking at him. your cheeks feel warm, probably a few shades pinker than usual. he smiles softly and nods, getting off of you to pull off his shirt. then, pushing down his sweatpants, his bulge very evident in his boxers.

he pushes his boxers down quickly, feeling eager to be inside you. "you ready?" he asks softly while slowly starting to rub his tip up and down your folds. you whimper softly and nod, spreading your legs just a bit more to give him better access.

he slowly pushes into you, a small grunt leaves his mouth as you squeeze around him. "so fucking tight." he whispers while he moves his hips a bit more. he leans down and nuzzles his face in your neck, breathing heavily as he thrusts into you slowly. your hands fall from his arms to the bed sheets, gripping tightly on the fabric.

he continues to thrust into you, hitting deeper with every movement. your breath hitches as you feel him pull out almost all the way. he suddenly pushes back into you roughly, not hard enough to hurt you.

“feel good, baby? fucking take it.” he grunts, his voice deeper than the last time he spoke. you nod quickly and grip onto his shoulder again, your other hand resting on his back. he starts to pound into you, gentle but still rough.

“im close.” he whines out as his hand finds it way lower, eventually finding your clit and rubbing gently. you let out a breathy moan as his fingers come in contact with it.

he speeds up his movements even more, the rubbing of his fingers on your clit start to sync with his thrusts.

“im gonna cum.” you cry out. “yeah? cum for me.” he says softly, not slowing down on his movements at all. your legs start to shake as you get closer. your nails dig into his back as he thrusts relentlessly into you.

you shut your eyes tightly as you feel yourself cumming, you unintentionally clench around his cock as you do so, causing him to whimper and shake his head. before you know it, haechan’s warm cum is spilling deeply into you. he pants heavily, still buried inside you.

he pulls his head away from your neck and kisses your lips gently, his hands kneading your boobs gently. he continues to kiss your lips, the kisses becoming a bit sloppy as he pulls out of you.

he leans back and watches as his cum slowly leaks out onto the sheets, staining them. his breath hitches at the sight, he looks up at you after a while as well, taking in your tired appearance.

he lays down next to you, rubbing your waist with his hand as he breathes heavily. “was that good?” he looks up at you. “yeah, it was.” you smile tiredly.

“we should take a bath before you sleep.” he suggests while looking at you. “no, im so tired.” you whine and shake your head. “fine.” he sighs softly, laughing softly a bit after because of your laziness.

“goodnight. i love you, baby.” he kisses your forehead gently and closes his eyes. “goodnight, hyuck. i love you too.” you whisper softly, your eyes slowly closing.

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note . . .

thank you so much for reading! i hope this wasnt too bad 😭 i haven’t written anything in a while so this is probably choppy af. i plan on being more active from now on hopefully! (no promises) i also want to thank everyone for the love and support on all of my last stories. i didn’t think they would get as much attention as they did and im so grateful. thank you! 💞

[writingquestionsanswered]

Tips for writers with ADHD that get major writers block/burnout

Writers with ADHD and Writer's Block/Burnout

Tip #1 - Troubleshoot the Problem - I want to start here, in the most obvious place, because even for writers with ADHD, writer's block is often the result of a specific issue that can be surmounted once identified. My post 5 Reasons You Lost Interest in Your WIP, Plus Fixes! addresses some of the most common ones. It's worth checking to see if something on there resonates with you as a potential obstacle to progress.

Tip #2 - De-Stress Your Writing Time - Human brains are wired to respond in specific ways to perceived threats... fight, flight, or freeze. Quite often, what we call "writer's block" is actually your brain having a freeze response to writing because it's causing you stress and is therefore perceived as a threat.

So, anything you can do to de-stress your writing time can help. Troubleshooting the problem as in #1 is a good start. Set reasonable goals and deadlines... you can estimate your available writing time and calculate that with your estimated WPM to see if it's even possible for you to hit your word count goal. Go easy on yourself when you don't reach goals... celebrate even the smallest of wins, because negative thinking makes writing more stressful. Do what you can to set up an inviting writing space, light a candle (safely), play soft music, use ambient lighting, have your favorite beverage and snack at hand.

Tip #3 - "Gamify" Your Writing - Turning your writing goals into game achievements can make writing fun, which is another great way to de-stress it. You can usually find free game board templates online, or you can create your own. I like to set mine up like this:

You can set as many tasks as you want (within reason) for each goal, and your prizes can be anything from a handful of candy to buying something you really want, or doing something you really want to do. Whatever works for your budget that motivates you to get the tasks done.

Tip #4 - Do an Immersive Writing Sprint Session - YouTube is a wonderland of helpful videos for writers... not just easily digestible writing advice and research information, but also writing music, ambience rooms, and one of my favorites, immersive writing sessions. These are themed ambience rooms with ambient video, music, and sound effects, but they also have a writing sprint timer on the screen, so you are encouraged to write for however long (usually 10 to 20 minutes), then you get a five or ten-minute break before the next sprint starts. These can be a really great way to get into the zone if you're struggling otherwise.

Tip #5 - Eliminate Distractions - When you have ADHD, pretty much anything can be a distraction. If my desk is messy, I'll pause mid-sentence to clean it rather than write. If there's something on my desk I can fidget with or play with, I'll do that. If my phone is handy, I'll pick it up and start scrolling through social media. If I'm listening to music with words, I'll go look up the lyrics and fall down some weird tangentially related rabbit hole. If I'm hungry or thirsty, I'll get up fifty times to get a small snack or drink. So, I clean my desk ahead of time and remove anything I might be tempted to fiddle with. I only play instrumental music (usually an ambience room). I put my phone on silent or leave it in another room.

Literally anything I can do to head my usual distractions off at the pass. For me, it actually makes a big difference. Try keeping a running list of things that distract you while writing during a week of writing sessions. Then, go through the list and write solutions. This helps you build a pre-writing session distraction elimination routine.

I hope something here will work for you! I may do a part two to this soon, so keep an eye out!

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I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking ♦ Learn more about WQA here

[choisanboobenthusiast]

The Ring

Pairing: Sub!Hwa x fem reader

Genre: smut MDNI

Word count: 6k

Summary: Seonghwa comes home after a day of schedules in that YSL shirt. After thinking about him all day you finally get to play with him and he wants nothing more than to let you.

If you want a nice audio to go along with this story @sugarnspice630 posted this one and it just fits sooo perfectly I couldn’t resist adding it.

Warnings: extremely sub Hwa, so much nipple play (duh he’s wearing that shirt), oral/fingering (f receiving), toys, ass play (m receiving, the bulk of this fic is ass play, if that’s not your thing don’t read this), overstimulation, dacryphilia, cum eating, slight choking, name calling, praise, slight degradation, begging. If I missed anything please let me know!

a/n: hiiii, it’s been a while! I’ve been working on this for ages 😭 I just didn’t have motivation to write anything for a long while. However, this shirt on Seonghwa made me go absolutely bonkers like I just wanna play with his nips y’know? I hope you guys enjoy! Thank you to @shinestarhwaa for requesting subhwa 🫶🏻 Feedback and reblogs are super appreciated :) (and yes I chose The Ring as the title to be funny bc well… you’ll see)

masterlist

You had been hanging around the house all day by yourself, trying to keep yourself busy with random tasks, watching your favorite show, playing videos games, even cleaning. You'd gone as far as getting yourself off three separate times but no matter what you did you couldn't distract yourself from all the dirty thoughts you were having about your boyfriend.

You had woken up early with him when his alarm went off even though you had the day off of work. You always liked waking up with him, even if it was at the ass crack of dawn sometimes. It meant you'd get a few snuggles in with him before he had to leave, which you appreciated since he would often be gone literally all day. Today wasn't any different except you cuddled too long, causing him to be a bit behind on getting ready. He showered faster than you'd ever seen him do. Seonghwa was usually the type to take his time as he took his hygiene and self care routine very seriously. But today he just didn't have the time, he had a photoshoot and various other schedules to get to.

It had all started when he came busting out of the bathroom back into your room, clad in nothing but the small beads of water he had failed to dry off of himself. They sparkled against his tan skin under the dim light of your bedside lamp and his wet hair hung messily around his face. It's not like you hadn't seen Seonghwa naked before, of course you had, plenty of times but there was just something about the way he looked in that moment, naked and wet, that made you instantly want him. You couldn't help this was yours bodies response and Seonghwa couldn't help that he didn't have time to do anything about it. No matter how much you whined about it.

You had eyed him up and down as he walked over to the dresser, definitely not staring at his cock as it hung soft in between his legs and certainly not thinking of making him late by putting it in your mouth. Your lingering gaze didn't go unnoticed by Seonghwa as he chuckled, facing away from you while he grabbed his clothing out of the dresser, his cute little ass on display for you. Your panties suddenly soaked at the mere thought of bending him over the dresser so you could play with him. You weren't sure what had come over you so early in the morning, the sun not even up yet, but you were never one to ignore your desires and Seonghwa was never one to deny them.

"Seonghwaaaa." You whined as you crawled to the end of the bed, grabbing his ass playfully as you stood next to him and began to pepper his shoulder with kisses, your other hand playing across his stomach.

"Yesss." He giggled at your actions.

"You can be late can't you?" The hand you'd placed on his stomach flitted up to his chest, your thumb just barely catching one his nipples as your other hand massaged his ass.

"Ughh." He groaned in frustration, his head tilting back slightly. "This is really important, I can't be late today and I'm already running behind- ah!" You had let your hand wander further south to stroke at his slowing hardening cock. He breathed in deeply before catching your wrist in his hand and removing it, apprehensively, from his appendage. "I'm sorry, baby, I really can't."

You groaned but accepted your defeat, telling him it was alright to which he kissed you sweetly on the forehead and promised to make it up to you later when he got home. And it was that promise that had you on the edge of your seat all day.

Finally, after what had felt like an eternity, you heard the front door unlock. You nearly ran from your spot on the couch to meet him, stopping dead in your tracks when you saw him. He had been styled to all hell, but in the best way possible. He wore a pair of dark slacks, his hair straightened and framing his face perfectly. On top he had a blazer that matched the pants, underneath he appeared to be wearing something very sheer, it piqued your interest.

"Wow." You gawked as you strolled closer to him. "What's all this?"

"Got to keep the outfit today." He beamed.

"It's nice." You fiddled with the front of his jacket, trying to take a peak inside as unobviously as possible but he caught on quickly.

"You wanna see the shirt?" He cocked an eyebrow at you. You only nodded, a devious smirk playing on your lips. He laughed lowly, removing his jacket to reveal a long sleeve blouse, completely sheer and extremely see through. Your heart jumped at the sight of him, gosh he really was so beautiful. "Like it?" As if he even needed to ask, you were practically drooling as you eyed his toned torso throughout the fabric, paying close attention to the way it brushed over his nipples whenever he moved.

"Love it." You answered, placing your hands gingerly on his hips before leaning in to kiss him. "You look sexy, baby."

He didn't bother responding, instead lifting his hands to snake them through your hair as he kissed you back. You groaned into his mouth as you pulled your bodies together, your hands finding their way quickly under his shirt to roam over the soft skin of his back. You stayed like this for a little bit, just kissing, hands roaming, tongues sliding together, breath quickening. His pants did nothing to hide his growing erection, every passing second you could feel him growing harder, pressing into you. You had been waiting all day to touch him, to feel him up against you, to play with him how you knew he liked. Now that you finally had him you were becoming restless more quickly than normal.

Still standing in the entryway, you suggested moving things to your bedroom, he was quick to agree. You could hardly keep your hands off each other as you made your way there, stopping every couple of steps just to kiss and touch.

"Been thinking about you all day, Hwa." You said, your hands chasing after his hips as he backed into your bedroom.

"Oh yeah?" He pulled you flush to him, fingers tickling at your collarbones.

"Mhm." You smirked and dipped your hands down to grab at his belt buckle. "You gonna be a good boy for me?" He nodded as you began to undo his pants, smirking at the effect these simple words had on him. "Yeah?" You unzipped his slacks and pushed your hand into them, feeling his hard cock through his underwear. "Gonna let me play with you until I'm satisfied?"

He groaned at the contact. "God, yes." His normally sweet and innocent eyes had turned lustful in an instant, staring down at you with need.

"So hard already, baby." You continued to palm him through his boxers.

"Been thinking about you all day, too." His fingers dug into the skin of your shoulders as his eyes closed. His mouth fell open slightly as you snaked your hand inside his underpants. You grabbed him gently, stroking his length slowly and running your thumb over his leaking tip. "Can I touch you too? Please."

Without a word you retracted your hand and rid yourself of your top, leaving your chest completely bare for him. "You can touch me up here but not anywhere else yet. Got it?"

"Mhmm." He wasted no time, his hands flying to your tits as soon as you gave him permission. He pinched at your nipples, rolling the hardening buds between his fingers while he kissed down your jaw, relishing in the tiny noises he drew from your lips. "So pretty." He mumbled, his lips making their way to your neck.

He continued to massage your breasts as you returned your hand to it's previous position, allowing the other to explore underneath his top. He loved the way you touched him. Loved how your hands felt as they grazed his stomach and flitted up to caress his chest. He was always so sensitive to your touch, his body jolting at the feeling of your fingers on one of his nipples, a tiny whine escaping him. You let your thumb rub slow circles over the bud as he grabbed your face in both his hands, kissing you hard. You kept your ministrations up as his tongue entered your mouth with ease, tasting you like it was his first time.

Still slowly stroking his cock you pinched and pulled at his nipple, earning yourself a string of whines and groans as his head tilted backward. There was nothing prettier than the sounds he made and you couldn't wait to pull more out of him. "Take you clothes off and get on the bed." You instructed, pulling your hands from him. "But leave this pretty little thing on." You fingered the hem of his shirt.

He followed your instructions immediately, taking his pants and underwear off hurriedly before getting on the bed on his back, propping himself up slightly on the pillows. His cock twitched against his stomach, leaking beads of precum onto his skin and shirt as he waited for you to come touch him. He stared at you hungrily, anticipating your next move, the mystery of what you might do sending excitement through him.

Today you weren't going to make him wait, mostly because you were so worked up already yourself. Usually, you'd tease him until he was begging and squirming, which admittedly didn't take all that long. But today you wanted to please him and then make him get you off afterwards, although you knew it wouldn't take anything to convince him. So before joining him on the bed you sauntered over to the closet, grabbing a box from the top shelf. Inside the box was every toy you and Seonghwa owned, save for some things like restraints and lingerie, neither of which were in your plans for the evening. Typically you'd just pick a toy and surprise him but you were feeling generous and wanted to let him choose.

"What do you want today, Hwa?" You asked, peeling the lid from the box and coming to sit beside him.

He looked at you wide eyed, surprised you were asking. "Whatever you want." He answered.

You set the box on the nightstand and touched his thigh gently. "I want you to choose, baby." You smiled, stroking his skin lightly. "Just pick what you want and set it on the bed." You turned your head away, wanting to be surprised.

You felt the bed shift a little underneath you and then heard him sifting through the box before he whispered out a meek "okay."

When you turned back to face him you were surprised to see three toys laid out next to him as opposed to one, which you were expecting. "Aren't we being a little greedy here?" You teased, taking note of the fact that they were all his and none were yours. "These are all for you, what about me?"

He was apologetic immediately. "I-I can put one back or swap one out-"

"Well, we're definitely not doing that." You nearly laughed, closing up the box and placing it on the floor before putting his chosen toys in it's place on the bedside table. "You chose these three things, we're gonna use all three. I guess you'll just have to work extra hard to get me off yourself then, huh?"

"I'll be good, I promise." He sat up, leaning into you, caressing your sides and kissing your shoulder. "Wanna make you cum." His fingers flitted back up to your chest, toying with your nipples once again as you sighed and turned to kiss him.

Before you knew it you were lying on your back, head pressed into the pillows with Seonghwa in between your legs, knuckle deep in your pussy. He had already made you cum once from just his fingers and was now determined to get you off again with his mouth. He loved how you writhed beneath him when he sucked on your clit and pulled at his hair when he curled his fingers inside you just right. You were a wet, sticky mess beneath him, gasping and moaning as your cunt clenched around him repeatedly.

There were few moments were Seonghwa got dominant but with his face pressed in between your thighs he leaned into it quite a bit more, which you never complained about. He'd edge you and overstimulate you until you switched roles again. You'd get this tone in your voice that let him know it was time to stop or give you what you want. And being the good boy that he was, he'd always listen.

"Fuuck." He groaned out, eyes darting upward to look at you, lips still attached to your leaking core. "Taste s'good." You couldn't find it in you to respond, at least not with words. Instead, gripping his hair tighter while grinding against him. While he played the dom part in this position, it was really you who was in control. He knew it, and loved it, wanting nothing more than to be controlled by you. "Fuck yes, baby, fuck my fingers." He was relentlessly pushing his digits in and out of you, an obscene squelching sound filling the air as he licked and sucked on your clit. He felt your walls clenching down on his fingers, watching your eyes roll back. "Gonna cum?"

"Mmm!" You whined, still unable to form a single coherent thought. The only thing on your mind the feeling of Seonghwa's long tongue dipping into your entrance with his fingers, your clit catching on his nose, your whole body seeming to light on fire at the sensation. Seonghwa loved it when you rode his face, wanted to be covered in your slick by the time you were done. You, of course, would grant his wish every time.

As you ground onto him with a tight hold on his hair he groaned lowly into you, the vibration of his voice sending you over the edge. Your body trembled and shook as you came undone, your legs snapping closed around your lover's head as he worked you through your high. As your body went slack he slowed his movements, massaging your thigh with his free hand and peppering kisses along your skin gently. He removed his fingers slowly, rubbing them through your soaked folds a few more times before you gave his hair a harsh tug. He got the message, retracting from your sensitive core completely and lifting his face to stare at you.

With your bare chest heaving, you looked down at him, and what a sight he was. His face glistened with your wetness, smeared across his nose and cheeks, dripped down his chin and with a wide smile and sparkling eyes he licked you off his lips. He sighed out, resting his cheek on your inner thigh, both his arms still hooked around you as he stroked your skin lovingly.

"I did good for you?" He asked.

"So good." You mused, sitting up a bit, your hand still tangled in his dark locks, you pulled him backward. He didn't resist, allowing you to do what you wanted. "Now it's your turn baby boy."

Seonghwa had grabbed three toys, a vibrating cock ring which you planned to put on him right away, and a butt plug and vibrator which you planned to tease him with until he was crying. You made him lie on his back first, sliding the cock ring onto his shaft and placing it just below the head, the vibrating part on the underside where you knew he liked it. He fisted the sheets while you stroked him lazily, not yet turning on the vibrations. His lips trembled as he watched you rub your palm over the head and pump him slowly, little gasps and groans escaping him.

"Feels good?" You questioned, although you already knew the answer.

"Fuck, feels so good." He answered.

"Ready for more?"

"Please." He nodded eagerly.

"Flip over, hands and knees."

He did as you said, switching positions to get on his hands and knees. He knew what was coming of course and his body shook with anticipation. You trailed your hands over his back, massaging him lightly, squeezing his shoulders and neck gently, raking your fingers through his hair. He still wore the shirt he'd come home in, it hung loosely around his shoulders as the hem brushed across the mattress. You let your hands travel down his sides and over his hips before squeezing his plump ass in both your hands, being sure to massage the flesh there too. As you did so he fell forward slightly, now supporting himself on his elbows as his breath quickened.

You grabbed a bottle of lube, dripping some in between his cheeks before coating your index and middle finger in the substance. You carefully rubbed your fingers over his hole, his breath hitching at the contact. You kept a slow pace, prodding your middle finger into his entrance just slightly before removing it to rub over him again. Simultaneously your free hand wandered over his soft skin, squeezing his cock and pinching his nipples, drawing out little whines from him. Any minute now he would start begging you to fill him and fuck him and let him cum. You sunk your middle finger into him completely and he groaned out into the sheets, his fists clenching at the feeling of you moving in and out of him slowly.

"Please, more." There it was. He lifted his head from the pillow it had been shoved into and peered back at you, his big brown eyes pleading as he whimpered for more. "Please, baby."

"Want another finger?" You asked.

"Yes, please." He nodded.

"Since you're being such a good boy."

You complied with his request, slotting your pointer finger in slowly next to your middle finger. He watched you still, mouth agape as you stretched him out, nearly drooling as you pumped you fingers a little faster. He groaned and closed his eyes, giving himself over to the pleasure and burying his face back in the pillows. Eventually your fingers moved quickly in and out of him, your other hand nonstop toying with his nipples. His body was shaking with every thrust of your fingers, moans and whimpers escaping him as you pinched and pulled at his sensitive buds which were now red from being played with. You purposely avoided touching his leaking cock all that much, wanting him as desperate as possible.

"P-please, fuck me." He whined into the pillow, his hips moving involuntarily with the motions of your hand. "Fuck, pleeease."

"You want your toy now, baby?" You slowed your movements, finally dropping your hand down from his chest to stroke at his cock, red and leaking all over the sheets.

"Yes, y-yes, want you to fuck me." He pleaded, voice shaking, taking on a high pitched tone. "P-please, please, I've been so good. Been a good boy. Wanna cum." He babbled on.

"You have been a good boy." You agreed, carefully removing your fingers from him. "My good boy." You grabbed his vibrator from the nightstand, lubing it up generously. It was certainly larger than your two fingers, but you knew he could take it. You rubbed the toy over his hole, prodding his entrance with the tip of it. "You're such a little slut, Seonghwa," He groaned. "Asking me to fuck you with three different toys. Begging me to fill you up."

"Yes, please, f-fill me, please." He was grinding his hips back onto the toy, desperate for it to enter him.

"You love it when I stretch you out? Fuck your tight little hole until you're crying?" You started to push the toy into him at an extremely slow pace.

"Please please please." He begged. "Please, more. Want m- unghh." He moaned as you turned on the vibrations, pushing it in further.

"I love it when you beg me, baby." You reached for his cock again, this time flicking on the cock ring. His whole body shuddered as you did so, causing the toy to slip in further and the most obscene sounds to fall from his lips. You began to slowly move the toy in and out of him, pushing it deeper with each thrust as you pumped his cock in unison. "Doing such a good job." You praised. "Taking it so well, Hwa. Does it feel good?"

"Yes!" He nearly shouted. "F-fuck, it feels so good. Love when you fuck me."

You continued like this for a little while, fucking him harder and faster but not yet letting the toy sink all the way in. You were honestly surprised he hadn't cum yet with the way he was mewling and gasping for air. At the very least you knew he must be close.

"D-deeper." He whimpered. "Need it deeper."

"Oh yeah? My baby boy wants the whole thing?" He nodded eagerly and whined when you gave him what he wanted. With the entire length of the vibrator sheathed inside him you released his cock from your hold and brought your fingers up to curl harshly into his hair. You pulled his face up from where it was in the pillow, his eyes wide as he looked back at you, face flushed, a bit of drool dribbling down his chin. You were no longer moving the toy in and out of him, instead just letting it sit inside him as it buzzed. Nearly every breath he exhaled was accompanied by a broken whimper, his mouth agape as he stared at you with all the admiration in the world. Without warning him you turned the vibrations up, hitting the button twice to put it at it's highest setting.

"Ah!" His breath hitched violently, the muscles in his back and arms tensing. His tanned skin now glistening with a sheen of sweat. "Please keep f-fucking me. Wanna cum. Let me cum please."

"Seonghwa, you can cum whenever you want, my prince."

"Mm-mm." He shook his head. "Don't wanna cum unless you- unless you're fucking me. Need you to fuck me." His voice trembled as he spoke and the way his fingers dug into the pillow told you he was holding back on purpose.

"Fuck, Seonghwa." You groaned at the sight of him, the throbbing in your pussy growing greater by the second. "Just need to have your ass fucked, huh?" You began to do as he asked, moving the toy in and out of him again, your other hand still gripping his hair. "Can't cum unless I play with your little ass? Fuck, look how good you're taking it." You released his hair, smacking his ass hard. He let out a high pitched strangled moan.

"Harder, please." He whined and you complied. Though you weren't sure if he meant fuck him harder or smack his ass harder, you opted to just do both. Going as fast and hard as your tired wrist would allow you to with the toy you slapped his cheeks a few more times, red marks beginning to form immediately. He was shaking now, a near constant stream of whimpers escaping his throat.

"Wanna cum?" You asked, obviously already knowing the answer.

"Yes, yes, yes." He cried.

"Play with your cock then." You demanded.

He did as you said, snaking a hand underneath his torso to stroke himself needily. "Ahhh, I'm g-gonna cum, gonna cum for you."

"Dirty boy. Gonna cum from getting your ass fucked?"

"Yes! Fuuuuck." He was pumping his cock quickly, hips stuttering as he tried to simultaneously fuck into his fist and move his ass back on the toy. "Right there, oh fuck, don't stop!"

"When you cum you're gonna catch it all in your hand, understood?"

"Mmmmf!" He nodded.

"That's my good boy."

With your praise he fell apart, his other hand coming down to catch his release as his entire body shook. His voice cracked as he moaned, his eyes squeezed shut and mouth agape as he rode out his high.

"Good fucking boy, cumming so much for me." You continued to praise him as he shot his load into his hand. "Make sure you don't drop any or you'll be in trouble."

Once the trembling in his his legs died down you removed the vibrator carefully, setting it aside before turning off his cock ring. Seonghwa stayed in his position, face down, ass up, chest heaving, tiny sounds still managing to be heard from him.

"On your back now." You helped him turn over, gazing at his fucked out face. Strands of his hair stuck to his forehead, his cheeks flushed red and he glistened with sweat everywhere. "Use your cum as lube, I'm gonna ride you." You instructed, grabbing his butt plug off the nightstand. "And get this nice and wet for me." You presented it to him and he followed your directions, lubing himself up with his own release, gasping and whining at the feeling of overstimulating his softening cock. He then reached his hand out to rub it around the butt plug and without having to be asked shifted the cock ring to rest at the base of his shaft instead of the head. "You're being so good for me, baby." You cooed, rubbing the flesh of his thighs gently. "Now show me your little ass. You want it plugged up don't you?"

He nodded fervently. Hooking his hands behind his knees, not seeming to care one bit that one of them was fully covered in his arousal, he pulled them towards his chest, displaying himself for you just as you'd asked. His cock twitched against his stomach as he stared down at you In between his legs, rubbing the plug over his abused hole. He was fully hard again almost immediately, throwing his head back with his eyebrows threaded together as you pushed the plug past his rim. He squeaked when the plug settled fully in his asshole and you ran your hands along his legs, admiring him spread out before you.

"So pretty, Hwa." You complimented, pulling his legs back down onto the mattress and straddling him. "My gorgeous boy." You slotted your wet pussy right over his dick, grinding yourself over him, leaning forward to kiss him. His hands grabbed at your ass, encouraging you to continue to move. A bit of the cum that was still left on his hand now transferred to your skin but you didn't care, you'd both need a shower after this anyways. "This shirt looks so good on you, baby." You sat up a bit to trace his collarbones and shoulders through the sheer material before bringing your fingers down to his nipples, circling your thumbs over them gently. His breath caught in his throat, his body jumping slightly. "Awe, my baby's so sensitive." You pushed his shirt up, bending down to attach your mouth to one of his nipples, circling your tongue around it and nipping at it carefully with your teeth as you continued to pinch and pull at the other. This earned you a series of whines and his hands in your hair.

"Fuck. Please, wanna be inside you." He breathed.

"Oh yeah?" You pulled away from his chest and his own hands found their way to your breasts, giving you the same treatment he'd just received. You sighed out and closed your eyes. "Want you inside me too, Hwa."

You reached down and turned the vibrations back on his cock ring, causing him to jolt at the sensation. You pumped his hard cock a few times, sliding the tip through your folds and over your clit, both of you moaning. You lined him up with your entrance, slowly sinking down onto his length, the cock ring coming in contact with your clit as he bottomed out. You planted your hands on his chest as he grabbed at your hips, looking up at you with stars in his eyes, eyebrows pinching, mouth agape.

"Fuck baby, your pussy feels so good." His fingers dug into your flesh as you began to move.

Before long you were riding him like your life depended on it, bouncing on his cock quickly. The sound of your wet skin slapping together filled the room, as did both of your obscene moans. You were close to cumming already, the feeling of his fat cock filling you over and over mixed with the vibrations of the cock ring hitting your clit every time you came down on him causing you immense pleasure. Seonghwa didn't look like he was going to last long either, his fucked out expression only worsening with time, tears forming in his eyes, a few escaping. His overly sensitive cock just taking what you gave him. Eventually you collapsed onto his chest, grinding your clit over the cock ring while kissing his neck fervently, nibbling at his earlobe, making sure to whine right in his ear.

"Fuck, you're gonna cum aren't you?" He asked, voice cracking, slapping your ass harshly as you nodded into his shoulder. "Fuck yes, baby, cum on my cock." He encouraged, smacking your ass again. "Gonna cum with you. Gonna fill up your pussy. Can I? Fill up your slutty little cunt?"

“Fuck yes, Seonghwa.” You gripped his hair, feeling the coil within you getting dangerously close to snapping with his words. “Be a good boy, cum inside me. Fuuuck, I love your cock.”

“Please! Please cum!” He shouted suddenly. “S’too much, I can’t.” He let the tears flow freely now, it appeared he had been holding them in. With his arms wrapped around your torso he held your body tightly to his, with his eyes squeezed shut and his little sobs falling right into your ear. “Please, need you to cum. Ican’tIcan’tIcan’t.”

You felt his fingers digging into your back, his body shaking beneath you as he cried. You knew if he truly didn’t want to continue he’d use your safe word. Seonghwa took pleasure in the immense overstimulation and enjoyed crying for you because he knew you liked it when he did. “Yes, you c-can, Seonghwa. Doing so good, baby, just a little more- ohh shit.” You felt your orgasm approaching quickly, the heat in your core building. You wrapped your fingers around his neck, applying some pressure. “Cumming, Hwa, m’cumming! Fill up my pussy, baby.”

Didn’t have to tell him twice, he came immediately as your cunt clenched around him, both of your bodies shaking as you climaxed together. He let a loud, broken sob as he released deep into you. You both rode out your orgasms, panting and whining, Seonghwa still crying. After a minute, both your highs died down and you lied on top of him, sticky skin sticking to his as you released your heavy grip on his throat. He tapped at your back quickly.

“P-please, t-turn it off.” You had almost forgotten about the cock ring buzzing around his length. He sniffled as he spoke, his voice sounding pained. “Please! Turn if off, t-turn it off!”

You almost didn’t, considering keeping it on and fucking him again. But with the way he was crying and shaking you thought he might not be able to handle anymore. So you complied with his request, sitting up just enough to reach in between your sweat covered bodies and turn off the toy.

“There you go, baby.” You cooed, petting his face sweetly. He let out a sigh of relief, a jumble of quiet and tired “thank you’s” falling from his swollen lips. His head slumped to the side as his body calmed down a bit. “My prince looks so pretty when he cries.”

You kissed his jaw gently, swiping some of his tears away. You stayed like that for a little while longer, his cock softening inside you as you continued to stroke his skin softly and pepper him with gentle kisses. You couldn’t bring yourself to part from him yet, wanting to be connected to him forever. His breathing eventually slowed, his crying nearly subsided and he began to run his own fingers along your back. You felt his cum dripping out of you, spilling out down the sides of his shaft. You reached your hand in between your bodies once again, this time to collect some of the sticky substance that was dribbling out of you. You swiped your fingers around his dick and through your folds before bringing them up to his face.

“Open up.” You said softly. “Look at me.”

He obeyed. Opening his mouth and jutting his tongue out slightly while simultaneously opening his watery eyes to look at you. You slid your three fingers along his tongue and he closed his lips around them as you pushed them back into his mouth.

“Mmm.” He groaned around your digits.

“That’s my good boy.” You praised. “Do you taste good?”

He nodded and continued sucking on your fingers, swirling his tongue around them and swallowing down the mixture of both your juices. When you removed your fingers he opened his mouth wide, sticking his tongue out to show you he had swallowed it all. When he closed his mouth he puckered his lips cutely, silently asking you for a kiss. You obliged, pressing your lips sweetly onto his, parting his lips with your tongue. The salty taste of his own cum lingered and you could faintly taste it as you lazily made out. Before long you could feel him hardening inside you once again.

“Getting hard again, Hwa.” You whispered into his ear, placing chaste kisses along his jaw.

“Can’t help it.” He said quietly. “Pussy’s so warm around me.”

“You wanna go again?” You asked, very gently rocking your hips once. He immediately dug his fingers into your side, holding your firmly in place and shaking his head.

“No, can’t.” He almost sounded like he was going to cry again. “Please, can’t go again.”

“Shh, okay, it’s okay.” You pet his hair and carefully lifted yourself off of him. “No more tonight, baby, you did so good for me.” You continued talking to him as you sat beside him and reached down to remove the cock ring, trying your best to distract him from the feeling. “You wanna take a bath?” You began to pull the ring up his shaft slowly and his hands fisted into the sheets. He nodded, squeezing his eyes closed. “Okay, good. We’ll get you all cleaned up.” You wiggled the ring over the head of his cock, which was now bright red and overly sensitive. He sucked in sharply, a tiny squeak leaving the back of his throat as you the ring brushed over his sensitive tip. “Good job, honey.” You set the cock ring to the side and rubbed his arms lovingly. “You okay?”

He released the sheets from his tight grip and placed both his hands on your thighs, a tired smile spreading across his lips as he stared up at you. “I’m okay, my love. You take such good care of me.”

You placed a hand on his cheek and he nuzzled his face into your palm, giving you a kiss there. “Let’s get you into that bath then.” You leant down and kissed him. “Wanna cuddle.”

[eunxhan]

❝ But remember, in this game, there are no winners or losers. There's only survival and satisfaction. ❞

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Ꮺ 😪 Requested ⨾ HEY I looked at your profile and it’s literally so pretty, and you write for so many fandoms I’m literally dying…Now I wanted to ask for a ticci toby x male reader! Committing a crime together, covered in blood only to end up on the mansion/forest making out. Feel free to add horror, any amount of smut or anything you’d like. Thank you in advance and, is “😪” free for anon?

Ꮺ Eun Replies ⨾ I'm sorry for taking too long but thank you! I'm still not good at writing gore but I do added smut and I tried putting on violence..? But I hope this doesn't disappoint you ^^

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Ꮺ Disclaimer — NSFW AT THE END. If you're under the age of 16-18, I'm not responsible for what content you consume.

Reader & Genre ⨾ MALE!Reader, He/Him/His

Words used ⨾ 1,236 words 6,850 characters

Character ⨾ TOBIAS ROGERS (Ticci Toby), He's an adult here.

Art Credits ⨾ @/shatteredankles

Links ⨾ My Navigation and Mandates

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Toby is known to play tricks on people. While he has been known to steal things for his own amusement, he usually returns them later or pays for them with some form of "payment" like a practical joke back at the store owner. While Toby doesn't have a conscience, he has a sense of right and wrong, but it's based on what is funny, rather than what is morally correct.

Toby takes pleasure in playing harmless practical jokes on people, especially those who have wronged him. When Toby steals something, it is generally for fun and not for personal gain. His motivation is that he finds it amusing to see the reactions of the people who he is stealing from. He usually returns the items later, or replaces them with something else that is equally funny.

On the other hand, [M/N] is more of a thrill-seeker. He love taking risks and trying new things. How do he and Toby met? That's now on you, He's also very creative and can often find ways to get away with things that most people would never even think of. He tend to see stealing as a game, with the goal being to get as much as he can without being caught. [M/N] loves the adrenaline rush he get from stealing, and he often take items he doesn't even really want just for the thrill of it.

Both Him and Toby are quick on their feet and could easily escape into the forest. They might even have a secret hideout in the forest where they could hide out and plan their next adventure. Ticci Toby would probably enjoy the chase and try to make a game out of it, while [M/N] would be more focused on getting away as quickly as possible.

Toby would likely be both impressed and annoyed if [M/N] tried to one-up his game. He would be impressed because he appreciates cleverness and originality, but he would also be annoyed because he views stealing as a competition, and he wouldn't want anyone to be better than him at it. He would likely try to one-up him back, leading to a sort of back-and-forth battle between the two thieves.

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Toby and [M/N] had been stealing together for some time now, and they had developed a strong sense of competition with each other. They would often try to one-up each other, stealing bigger and better things than the other had, and would sometimes even bet small amounts of money on who could get away with the most valuable prizes. But despite their competitive spirit, they also loved to tease each other, taking any opportunity to make fun of each other's methods or techniques. This made stealing together a fun and exciting adventure for both of them, even if at times it could also be a bit intense and competitive.

Both are competitive as hell, They're a couple of teens and one of them is a literal killer. Their competitive instincts often led to them teasing each other to an extreme, pushing each other's buttons until all that was left was pure annoyance and anger. In these moments, they would often come very close to physical violence, but neither one wanted to actually hurt the other. Making Toby in a sour mood, He would mumble slurs against his breath whenever [M/N] "wins"

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Ꮺ ⨾ ONESHOT —

As they hurriedly made their escape from the store, they couldn't help but feel a competitive tension brewing between them. They found themselves in the forest, having just pulled off a daring heist and hiding out in some gross abandoned building. Their nerves were on end and they were both feeling the adrenaline from the excitement of the robbery. As they argued over who had been more responsible for the successful heist, they began teasing each other relentlessly, their words becoming more and more heated.

In the heat of the moment In the heat of the moment, the tension between Him and Toby reached a fever pitch. The air was thick with anticipation, and the dim light filtering through the broken windows cast eerie shadows on the decaying walls. Toby's heart raced as he glanced over at him, Toby's eyes narrowing as he took in the sight of him. The two thieves were standing inches apart, taunting each other, their eyes locked in a battle of wills. They felt the anger and resentment building between them, but neither one could seem to let go.

[M/N] 's breath tickled his skin, his words sending shivers down his spine. Toby could feel the heat radiating off his body, and he couldn't help but be drawn to him despite their rivalry. His mind raced as he tried to think of a clever retort, but before he could utter a word, [M/N]'s lips crashed into his. The force of the kiss left him breathless, him lips tingling with delight. Toby' S hands instinctively gripped [M/N] 's waist , pulling him closer to him as he kissed him back with fervor.

As their tongues danced together, exploring the depths of each other's mouths, [M/N] felt a fire ignite within him. He could feel the warmth spreading through hiz body, his core throbbing with desire. Toby'z hands began to explore his body, his fingers tracing the contours of the man's curves, sending shivers up his spine.

Toby pulled away slightly, his eyes locked with [M/N] as he spoke in a husky whisper, "You may be clever, but you're also right about one thing. I do want to see who can outlast whom in this game we're playing."

They continued to tease and provoke one another, Toby couldn't help but feel his heart race with anticipation. The tension between them was palpable, the air thick with desire and competition. He could see the hunger in [M/N]'s eyes, the way his gaze lingered on his body, and it only fueled his own desires.

As they circled each other like predators, their hands grazed and brushed against one another, sending electric shocks through their bodies as well as both of them grinding on each other. [M/N]'S breath hitched as Toby's fingers lightly traced the curve of his waist, his touch sending waves of pleasure coursing through him. Their bodies pressed against each other, the heat between them almost unbearable.

"Wow.. Ha.. You couldn't get enough of me, do ya?" [M/N] whispered in between the kisses, Toby frowned hearing that and lunged forward, his lips capturing [M/N] once again in a searing kiss. the intensity of their passion was overwhelming. Toby's knees buckled, his body melting against [M/N] 's as he moaned into his mouth. His hands roamed freely over his body, exploring every curve, every inch of his skin.

As their kiss deepened, Toby felt an insatiable hunger grow within him. the kiss came to an end, Toby and [M/N] pulled apart, looking at each other with a mixture of fear and excitement in their eyes. They had both felt something they had never felt before, a connection that went beyond their petty competitions and the rush of stealing, Toby's eyes locked with [M/N]'s as he whispered, "You win this round, Reader. But the game is far from over.."

They have completely forgot about the food and drinks they stole, that was now on the ground..

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Ꮺ ⨾ I DO NOT CONSENT TO MY WORK BEING COPIED OR TRANSLATED.

[vigilskeep]

i have never thought of the bg3 paths as railroaded before but oh my god... i see your vision. i think that, for all that can be picked apart in the writing of dragon age, the worldbuilding in that series is so so interested in complicating all factions that you can envision a character who /makes sense/ while bouncing through various ideologies. and the sort of fantasy writing in (most of) the forgotten realms doesn't really allow for that.

dao is particularly the light of my life because the origins mechanic is specifically intended to let you create a character who has a distinctive perspective on the world that’s grounded in the worldbuilding. one of my favourite aspects of this is several origins having completely different codex entries on their own culture as opposed to those an outsider would get. it’s really good! it’s also a reasonably grounded world (while obviously silly) because, like, the basic fundamental premise of thedas, from which they ikea flatpack built almost every feature, is “how would people react to magical and fantastical diversity? the same way they react to human diversity.” you’re meant to feel like, aside from i guess the darkspawn, people are normal and have real motivations. sure it has to fulfil certain roles in a story, and dragon age was manufactured too quickly and purposefully for everything to land feeling authentic, but evil in dragon age should feel recognisable. and in most of the origins they give you a chance to do something that is bad, but also totally makes sense, because of the context of your character belonging to this world where these things happen

in dnd/the forgotten realms it’s a bit different because capital e Evil exists, so there are people and deities and devils (and, to open another can of worms, races) whose entire goal is to Do Evil. it’s also harder to produce grounded evil because in a world where i’m being given basically no context and just told to make whatever i want, i don’t have an inch of the kind of social information i get from for example a dao origin: what my character has been taught to believe they should do to survive, who they are willing to sacrifice, whatever. bg3 also happens to have a main plot goal that is, at least for the first part of the game, broadly selfish (“i am sick, and i need a cure”) which works really well for getting a bunch of people with vastly differing moral standards to band together for the same goal, and not so good for any kind of “greater good” type blurred morality, so that’s out too

however much the worldbuilding factors into this, bg3 specifically went for quite a clear distinction between the good path and the capital e Evil Path, and i find it pretty hard to vary up the good path. when i say railroaded i mean you either do the specific thing that gets you a quest down the line or not. i was really disappointed actually in my playthrough where i totally fucked up in the druids’ grove and caused a fight to break out, because it immediately instakilled tons of characters i knew i would need down the line. the few it spared needed some of the dead ones to stay alive in later quests, so it’s like... oh. that’s just... over. for both factions. bg3 arguably lets you do basically anything you want but they are able to do that because if you fuck around it just breaks the entire quest line from coming up again, which means playing a character who fucks up is not even really going to get me consequences it’s just going to cut content from the game. does that make sense? and then the Evil Path is just straight up evil, like... there’s no way for me to complicate and empathise, here, especially playing a blank canvas character whose motivations i would have to make up from nothing, and who faces basically no consequences for not doing this. the only neutral/cowardly/self-interested option in act 1 is to do neither path, which gets me the least content because i literally don’t get to play the fucking game

i don’t know, i’m not saying it’s necessarily bad just that it’s hard for me, personally, and how i like to create characters. especially when you have my constant restart disease and you have to do this all over again a dozen times just for a handful of different dialogue. does any of that make sense

[caraphernellie]

wip !! here's a moodboard <3

fake happy // e.w.

ellie williams is a freak, and that's just a fact. others deemed that she is not to be trusted from the moment she was born. in a world where everything is real and raw, it's hard to lie. but ellie doesn't quite fit into the category of 'real and raw.'

everybody's moods are displayed above their heads like little emoticons - there's no fake, there's no lies, there's simply emotion. except for ellie. nobody could figure out why ellie's feelings were not displayed. she'd been seen by every doctor, every specialist, every psychiatrist, and psychologist, and none of them knew what could cause this. and so an assumption was made that she doesn't feel anything.

nobody knows how she feels at any given moment, and in a world where people are spoiled with honesty, nobody wants to believe ellie isn't dishonest. nobody wants to be played by her.

somehow surviving life up to college without ever even having a friend, ellie's accepted that she's in for a lonely life. the only person she has is joel, and well, even he can be misunderstanding at times.

and ellie's sure her professor must hate her, because he partnered her for a project with the one girl who is always happy, without fail. the girl whose mood above her head is always, always, always a yellow smiley face. ellie would even say she's jealous, that she hates you, but she can't help but feel herself smiling whenever you're around. you're like a ray of sunshine. if sunshine knew how to lie.

ok ok ok so. i feel a little bit crazy and like nobody is going to like this fic but i kind of want to write it. this is just me posting to see if anyone actually would read it 😭 not like that would motivate/demotivate me but idk. im curious paramore inspired fics first of all, the best ones. secondly, i feel like maybe years ago i read a fic with a similar premise which inspired this but it's also mainly inspired by the music video for fake happy by paramore. and also, i always write fics about reader having the 'i can fix her' mentality for ellie so this time it's ellie saying 'i can fix her' about reader. this one would be for my fellow sad/anxious girlies who love big hurt/comfort vibes. it would be an angsty ride but not without lots of comfort :D two people who are very sad falling in love and helping each other with their issues? i think yes. this fic would be very? angst and hurt/comfort and some fluff idk if there'd be smut ... anyway this was more a way for me to brainstorm for the idea (by making the moodboard and blurb) i have yet to do literally any plotting or writing for it..

from the river to the sea, palestine will be free 🇵🇸 i stand with palestine, and for that reason, i require everyone on my blog to keep themselves educated and participating in the fight for palestine's freedom. here are some links to educate yourself- 1, 2, 3. the last of us part 2 in particular is a game with zionist background. do not support neil druckmann by buying any of the games and please continue to engage in your media with critical analysis!! stay educated. !!! i urge you to participate in the global strike for palestine from february 18th - 25th !!!

[dangerouslyknown]

Hiromi Higuruma Headcanons 🌻

A/N: Ughhh I have been having literally 0 motivation for writing, kind of like an art block. I wanna write so much but something just prevents me lmao... But this man, I swear. He just sparked my will to write and hopefully also work off the requests and one trade with a friend I have been working on. Also I just haaaad to get these out of my head

Contents/warnings: Random general headcanons, relationship headcanons & NSFW headcanons. I am just writing about "his S/O" and referring to S/O with they/them. Doesn't contain spoilers from JJK story, just Higuruma and his existence

General headcanons

He listens to Modern Talking. Don't ask where this comes from, I just feel like he'd like their music. Also somehow I was thinking he'd like Bon Jovi, too? He isn't like a crazy fan for either of them, just likes various of their songs. Could see him listening instrumental music as well, like game/movie soundtracks

Surprisingly enough he isn't a huge drinker. He enjoys an alcoholic drink every now and then to refresh, but he knows his limits. He knows when it feels good and when it goes overboard

He doesn't have visible muscles for the most part, I'd like to think him having a bit of body fat which hides them. My man is an attorney, he hasn't been focusing in training or being physically fit all that much. He does like to keep himself in decent shape though, because healthy body equals a healthy mind

He's not tall per se, more like average height, definitely under 180 centimeters

He's a minimalist. He doesn't have anything "extra" in his apartment, just the necessities

Speaking off, his wardrobe probably isn't huge either. Maybe a basic suit or two, so he can wash the other and still have the other one wearable. Otherwise his wardrobe is filled with mostly casual comfortable clothes. He values practical clothes, too

If he ends up having time to play games, he'd definitely mostly be into single player, story focused games. Not into fps games. One of his favorites are, funny enough, Ace Attorney games (he also likes the soundtrack)

SFW relationship headcanons

He doesn't strike me as a person who would be into dating all that much, but if he finds so called a right person, he might consider it. He doesn't really sleep around with lots of people either

He values the personality of a person more than looks. Forming an emotional and a mental bond is what matters him the most when it comes to a relationship

He doesn't even have a type, really. He thinks he is capable of finding anyone attractive if their personality hits him

And while we are at it, I bet he would love to have conversations with his S/O about anything. He'd love to discuss anything, silly to serious to deep thoughts with the right person. He wants to hear his S/Os thoughts and share his own

He'd also love to have playful, sarcasm filled banters/debates with his S/O

Either quality time or physical touch are his love languages

Quality time, because he is often doing long days and working a lot so he might not be around as much as he'd like. But when he finally is around his S/O, no matter what they do, he is going to be very happy. He likes to do the most basic, mundane things together with his S/O. Having breakfast, watching TV, showering together, cooking together, sitting together in the same room...

And what comes to physical touch, he just loves to get touchy with his S/O and most of the time not even in a sexual way. It is like a way to make up for all the time he hasn't been around. All the little touches and kisses he exchanges with his S/O makes him feel so loved

Oh, and one thing he'd absolutely love is to get a massage from his S/O. He would literally melt to their touch

(NSFW under the cut)

NSFW relationship headcanons

I think he is pretty vanilla... But he is very open to try new things and kinks for his S/O and for his own curiosity. He'd also be pretty gentle overall, but he loves his sex passionate, with an intimate, personal feel to it

He is a heavy switch when it comes to dynamics. He can top, he can bottom. But I have a feeling he'd have a tiny little submissive side in the sheets. He isn't opposed to being dominative either, but like I said, he is mostly vanilla so these kind of dynamics aren't exactly what he desires in the sheets

He prefers to do all the sexy stuff mostly in somewhere private, only him and his S/O... but he can't deny that he has thought of taking them in his office. Something about the though of him fucking them on his desk turns him on

He would definitely love having sex with clothes (mostly) on. First of all, he can be a bit tired after long days (and lazy, too) but, like, just having his dick out of his fly... or both of his and his S/Os pants just slightly lowered. It's all just so hot for him

Oh, and he'd love to fuck his S/O anywhere (privately). On the floor, on the sofa, against a wall. He isn't picky, he just wants to feel good

I still feel like bed is his to-go, because he is often tired to do anything extreme and it's just overall more comfortable to get down to business in the sheets

Previously mentioned that his love language is physical touch which applies to this aspect too. Sex is also a part of that for him. Sex is also a way for him to feel deeply connected with his S/O, physically and emotionally

Sex with his S/O is his favorite stress relieving method

I'll say it: I never thought he'd have a big cock. Recently, I came across Kyo-00´s Headcanons of the dicks of JJK men, and I agree on her take of Higuruma. I had previously thought he'd be more like average sized or so

He doesn't need to have a huge cock though, because he knows how to use what he has. He also has his mouth, his nose and his hands to make one pleased

This could probably go without saying, but he loves when his S/O shows him that he is desired and cared for. He would get so excited if his S/O initiated intimacy and slid their hand to his pants to play with his still limp dick, stroking it while giving his neck and face soft kisses all over... (Consensually, of course. He isn't always in the mood for that stuff either) Anyhow, that just sends a message to him which turns him on. Who would even want to have sex with someone who doesn't seem into it?

I believe he wouldn't want kids, so he 100% would get a vasectomy especially if his S/O is a afab/female so there isn't a need to worry about pregnancy

[lizandbo]

okie doks, so i would like a hc where bokuto, kuroo, and maybe tsukishima react to seeing their volleyball player! girlfriend play for the first time

i love your blog btw :) it makes me happy <3

Volleyball player!reader x kuroo, bokuto and tsukishima

I’m so so glad that my writing makes you happy, plus this ask is like 100 years cuz time management is not a thing for me

Masterlist

Tsukishima

Before I say anything else HE WILL LAUGH WHEN YOU MESS UP

When you tell him that you play volleyball he might not believe you until he sees it with his very own eyes

He would believe you but ✨trust issues✨

If you ever invite him to one of your matches he just either gives a glare and says a monotone “ok” or grunt in response 

But most times he goes to your games without you knowing 

Tsukishima wants to see when do your best without the pressure of people yk watching you

Cuz honestly I feel that wholeheartedly 

But man when he does see you?

Bros gonna explode from being flustered 

He thinks that you honestly look really hot, but he never ever gonna say that

Not even when he’s being held by gunpoint, which honestly who would ask that question if you were being held by gunpoint?

Anygays 

He just appreciates your work ethic in volleyball

Not being too annoying and obnoxious about volleyball or not giving a fuck with his standards 

Nice balance 

and at some point you motivate him to push on his own hobbies (more so volleyball)

When you catch sight of him you whip your head around to get a double take almost getting whiplash in the process

He just covers his mouth and snickers by the confusion of your face just now realizing that he did attend your match after all

You shuffled up to him half bashful half excited to see tsuki

You wrapped your arms around his middle and he stared back to, giving you a little headpat 

“Sooo how did I do? Since you’ve been stalking me like a dimwit”

“You did better than last time ig, moron”

“You were here last time too??” 

“Now see your the dimwit here since you didn’t even realize I’m coming to your stupid games”

“Awww tsuki I thought would’ve never be here:(“

“Your an official dimwit” tsukishima says with a blush darkening 

Bokuto

He knew you played volleyball cuz he always has asked you how was your day? Every single fucking day

Even before you were dating

It might get a lil annoying sometimes but baby boy genuinely wants to hear about your day

Prolly at some point interrupts you by accident but once he realized he apologizes so damn much 

But a simple “it’s ok bo” is enough for him lmao

ANYWAYS 

IS SO PROUD OF YOU WHEN YOU PLAY

ALWAYS YELLS LETS GO Y/N OR HEY HEY HEYYYY THATS MY S/O

Vvvv proud baby 

Whatever position you play he’s so so so supportive 

“Y/n! That’s such a great set im so proud of you”

“I KNEW YOU COULD DO SO WELL BABY”

“HEY HEY HEY! That spike was so accurate, you should have a kiss as an award! Come her baby”

“BLOCK THEM BASTARDS! YEAHHH”

When the match/ practice is over he’ll quite literally jump and attack you with a bear hug smothering you to absolute death

You guys go to your car him carrying you bride style  and finding a withered mess of half dead rose petals in the passenger seat cuz bo was so focused on seeing you than bringing the damn bouquet of flowers he was gonna give you

“Well… maybe I’m just distracted by incredibly sexy and hot partn-“

“OKAY BOKUTO, LETS JUST GET IN THE DAMN CAR”

“Your also very cute when you stammer like that”

“Booooo”

Kuroo 

Also a vvv proud baby

Found out by having the volleyball match delayed and you coming home late

Quite literally did the mom “and where were you?” Thing on you

But he was concerned for his baby cuz you could’ve gotten kidnapped

You told him that you were at a game of yours and he was appalled 

“And you never thought that I would like to go?” Pouts like a little girl in a playful way

“Well I just never thought you wanted to go since your always so busy”

“Bullshit, I’d do anything for you” he practically manhandled you onto the bed and cuddled there

“Oh really? Anything??” Your eyes sparkled as he met your eyes with a small smile

“Yes baby, anything. Your my one and only”

“Ok so would you do the dishes for me? Oh oh and cook dinner too that would be absolutely fantastic”

Rooster wasn’t too happy with that response smh

SKJDJDJD I GET SO DISTRACTED ANYWAYS

rooster baby would go to any games when he has free time 

Analyzes your movements a lot 

But he’s never deeply judging you in a negative way, he’s just observing 

Becomes your personal trainer but would never push you too hard 

Always after matches no matter if you win or not he’ll always have some version of “you did well baby, now drink some water I’m not letting you be dehydrated”

Always gives you a meaningful hug too

Kisses are also a definite must

One on your forehead, nose and three on the lips

It’s like a secrete combination just between the two of you

Even tho it’s not even like a lock or some shit

It always amazing him how you do certain things when your focused into your game

Sometimes laughs at how cute you are

Just being a proud parent boyfriend is all you need

[lostaurorax]

could you maybe do for the mini series where the pregnant reader is at Travis’ game and we reveal to his teammates and the whole world they are having a child?? also keep it up! i love your imagines so much! i find myself coming back and rereading!❤️

picture perfect - travis kelce.

summary | the chiefs win the super bowl making it the perfect opportunity to tell the world and travis’s teammates the news

warnings | mentions of morning sickness + pregnancy

authors note | hi nonnies!!!!! hope you like this!!! thank y sm for the kind words 🥹 you motivate me to keep writing! lmk what you think and if u have any requests :)

it was the day of super bowl 57. the kansas city chiefs were playing the philadelphia eagles.

you were about 4 months pregnant and still had only told your close family and very few friends just till you passed your third month. you and travis had been planning on telling the guys today after the game no matter who won.

“oh my gosh hi y/n!!!!!” brittany said to you with open arms, as you walked into to locker room with travis following suit. you went up to brittany and travis went to talk to patrick and a few of his other teammates.

you hadn’t seen brit for a while because due to your pregnancy and the sickness that came with it, you had to skip out on many games in person. although you always supported from home, you had missed experiencing them in person.

“hi, brit! aw, i missed you so much!!” you said as you hugged her back.

“oh, girl i missed you more!! how are you?” she said smiling at you as she leaned down to pick up sterling who had been trying to get her mom's attention

“im good hun! how are you guys? my god, she’s getting so big! hi ster!!” you said as you smiled at the two-year-old in her arms as she smiled back at you.

“oh, we’re good! ugh i know they grow so fast!! wait till you see bronze he’s so big already!!” she said with a frown on her face

“i can just imagine! they’re both so cute though!!” you said as sterling tried reaching for you causing you to put your arms out and take her.

“aw did you miss auntie y/n?” brittany said as she pulled out her phone to take pictures of you two.

“oh wow look at these little ladies!” travis said as he and patrick walked toward the three of you

“wow y/n you look like a natural.” patrick said as he stood on brittany’s side with his arm around her waist.

“she’s gonna be a great mom one day!” trav said as he smiled down knowingly at you and you looked up at him with a smirk on your face

“oh she definitely will be!!!” brittany said as she took sterling back from you as she was starting to get fussy

“alright guys let’s go! ladies clear out!” said coach reid

“good luck baby. we love you.” you said as you leaned up to kiss travis and give him a hug

“i love you baby.” he said as he pulled away from the hug and gently brushed his hand over your stomach.

as you walked out of the locker room you turned back to blow him another kiss and wave goodbye.

you and the rest of the girls made your way up to your designated lounge and got settled in.

“y/n you are literally glowing!! have you been doing something new?” one of the girls had said to you as you were mid-conversation with brittany

“aw thank you! no i haven’t done anything different lately..” you said with a nervous laugh

“wow now that you mention it you do have a glow to you…” britt said as she examined your features with a confused face

“hm i don’t know what it could be���” you said as you nonchalantly shrugged and took a sip of your drink

but brittany just became 100% more suspicious. honestly, you had wanted her to be one of the first people you told but travis wanted to tell the whole team together so you obliged with his wishes.

she has been pregnant twice so she thinks she would be pretty good at detecting it in somebody else. she noticed the glow, and how you had been eating tons of junk but that honestly didn’t faze her much. what threw her off was your outfit she didn’t think much about it until now. you were wearing an overly large hoodie with travis’s jersey number and said “mrs kelce” on the back. she looked down toward your stomach and noticed that the hoodie wasn’t as oversized as it should’ve been. she kept quiet about her suspicions though not wanting to be wrong.

the chiefs had beaten the eagles 38-35 and everyone was ecstatic. you and the rest of the girls were all making your way to the field to find your husbands.

as you walked through the large crowd of reporters, families, players, and interviewers your eyes were finally met with the ones you had been looking for.

with a large smile on your face, you ran to your husband.

“good job baby!!!! i’m so proud of you.” you said with a huge smile on your face as you jumped into his open arms and placed multiple kisses on his face.

“thank you, my love. you know i had to do it for my girls.” he said as he smiled down at you and you smiled back leaning up to kiss him.

“i’m so beyond proud of you travy. my super bowl champ!” you said as you smiled at him with tears in your eyes as he shared the same expression so happy with how far you both had come.

after many interviews and hugs, you and travis made your way up to the big platform where many of his teammates were already on.

“you ready?” he said as he looked down at you making sure you were certain.

“yeah definitely. i think britt is getting a little too suspicious and she’s going to tell everyone before i get too.” you said as you laughed

“oh she definitely would.” travis said as he laughed and rolled his eyes walking closer to the front of the platform.

as he was greeted by his coach and fellow teammates he grabbed hold of the trophy in his hands making sure you were right by his side.

as terry bradshaw called travis to join his side he did. he asked him many questions about the game and how well he had played.

“now i see you’ve got your wife y/n here next to you is that correct?” terry said as he smiled at you

“yes this is my beautiful wonderful wife y/n!” travis said as he kissed your forehead

“she’s got to be a big part of your motivation for this game right? i mean it must feel great to just go home to her and be a super bowl winner!” terry said as he smiled at travis

“she is the reason i do this. if it wasn’t for her i wouldn’t be here right now…actually she isn’t the only reason i do this as of lately.” travis said a shy smile on his face as your heart rate raced.

“oh really? what’s your new reason?” terry said curiously

“well y/n is currently carrying our baby girl who is definitely the newest reason to why i do this!!” travis said as he rested his hand atop your stomach and you both smiled wide.

“wow, congratulations buddy! baby kelce coming to the world soon everyone!!” terry said as he patted travis on the back and he was immediately bombarded with hugs and congratulations from his teammates.

“oh, y/n!!!!! i knew it!!!!! oh my gosh i’m so happy!!!” brittany said as she found you and pulled you into a hug

“thank you brit!! i wanted to tell you at the beginning but travis felt it was special if we told everyone today!” you said as you smiled at her

“oh that’s fine i’m just so happy!! sterling your gonna have a little friend soon!” she said to the sleepy toddler in her arms as you smiled at her.

“congrats y/n!” patrick said as he came over with travis to give you a hug

“thanks pat!” you said as you hugged hun back

many of the other guys and girls congratulated you and you felt nothing but happiness radiating in the air.

you and travis were finally home after a very long night.

“i hope you know how proud i am…” you said to him as his head rested on your chest listening to your heartbeat as his hand found your stomach and rubbed circles on it

“i know baby. i don’t know what i would genuinely do without you….” he said as he kissed your chin

“did you like how we told everyone? it went to your liking..?” you said as your fingers ran through his buzzed scalp

“are you kidding? it couldn’t have been more perfect babe.” he said as he sat up slightly to look at your face

“i’m just glad your happy.” you said smiling at him

“couldn’t be happier…” he said as he kissed your lips gently and then returned his head to its previous spot. as he slowly drifted to sleep he couldn’t help the smile on his face. he had won his second super bowl with the same girl still on his arm and now bringing a baby into this world. what more could he ask for?

he had won his second super bowl with the same girl still on his arm and now bringing a baby into this world. what more could he ask for?

[and-then-the-dragons-arrived]

I'm getting REALLY angry at all "motivational" books / blogs / posts who keep saying things like "Stop watching TV / playing *World of Warcraft* and you will have a few hours a week to create a business / write a book / whatever".

Because I don't watch TV. I watched like two EPISODES of TV series last year. And probably no more than 5 movies of which some I didn't even finish.

I'm not playing video games. I wish I could but I don't have enough time.

I'm already sleep-deprived so don't even start with "Get up an hour earlier".

And I still can't gather more than a few minutes a day to work on my personal projects.

And even if I *do* find some time, sometimes I'm too tired or overwhelmed to do anything more challenging than going to sleep or scrolling my phone. And before you start with "So stop scrolling social media and you'll be able to write", just DON'T. At those times my level of focus is so low that I couldn't put two words together.

And I still WANT to do those projects. I NEED to be creative for my mental health.

So here's to those who - like me - have daily goals to write TEN words. No, NOT ten thousand or even a hundred. Just ten words. One or two sentences. If I'm lucky and can write a few hundred, that's great! But ten words are FINE. Do you know how many words I wrote yesterday? THIRTEEN. I had literally a few minutes.

I'm often writing on my phone because turning my computer on would eat up all the time I have to write. I don't have any special ritual with scented candles or special tea because all this setup takes too much of my time.

I'm writing all this because maybe you need to hear this.

Maybe you need to hear that setting tiny little goals is OKAY. You don't need to write thousands of words a day.

Maybe you need to hear that watching a movie or scrolling your phone when you're overwhelmed is OKAY. Having free time does not equal being able to do a task, especially a creative one. You can't be always on your 100% capacity.

Maybe you need to hear that there's someone out there (me) who is doing even less than you. If you add 20 words to your current WIP today, you're still ahead of me. So if you see those writers making amazing progress each day, just think there's me who's struggling to do 1% of that.

And that's OKAY.

[urtheloml]

wonder how we got this far (i don't really need to wonder at all)

pairing: bakugou x reader w/c: 9k synopsis: you're excited about the prom, bakugou is not— disagreement ensues a/n: i'm back... first post of 2023 n the year is almost over... embarrassing 🧍🏼‍♂️this is the third n final installation to my little white lie mini-series!! read part 1 here n part 2 here!! this can be read as a standalone too :3 uhm... i started this fic in like... april (??) n completely forgot abt it until last week so i have no idea what the original plot was going 2 be but i think it turned out okay (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) also i know this fic is SOOOO overdramatic but i have watched every single movie that had a major prom scene (hsm3, the duff, mean girls, etc) n growing up, i looked forward it to SO bad that i literally used it as motivation to do well in exams. but then COVID happened so no prom experience for me so this is me basically projecting onto my writing!! okay mwah hope u like it xx o((>ω< ))o!!

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. The opening scene of the Bee Movie plays like a mantra in your head as you're searching for something in your closet. Your ears pick up the occasional grunt or cheer from your boyfriend, who's currently laying in your bed with his DS in hand, and your eyes roll affectionately.

You can't find what you're looking for so you abandon the mess you've made in your drawer and turn to Bakugou instead. "'Katsu, have you seen my can of body glitter? It's in a little purple spray bottle."

Bakugo barely glances your way, "No, why would I have seen that. Why d'ya need it anyway?"

Your body slumps against his comfortably as you cosy up next to him on your bed and even if it's been a while, your heart still skips when he immediately tangles his legs with yours. "I need it to make myself glittery for the prom, duh. You can use it too if you want before we leave."

"Huh?"

"The prom. The dance thing we're going to, in like three days?"

Bakugou's eyebrows scrunch up confusedly as he puts his DS down and immediately a bad premonition settles in your gut. "What are you talking about? I never said I was going to that shit."

Ah. There it is. You're glad he put his game down 'cause if he wasn't looking at you while you're about to have this conversation then his console might have landed outside your window right about now. You're looking at him incredulously when you say, "What do you mean you're not going? You're my boyfriend so you have to go. It's like an unspoken rule... you can't not go to prom. Who's gonna take me then? You want me to go alone, like some loser?"

The barrage of questions makes him smile amusedly at you, but for once the sight of it induces anything but affection in you. There's no way he's taking you seriously right now. Bakugou scoffs and turns back to his game, "Huff all you want, princess, but I'm not going to the prom."

Before he can start a new game, your body lands on top of him unceremoniously so you have his undivided attention. "'Tsuki! This is our one and only prom as high schoolers. Doesn't that mean anything to you? I want to go and dance with my girls and I want to dance with you. Please?"

His jaw ticks, and he looks away from you because he knows if he stares too long then he'll cave. He refuses to go and you're not about to sway him. He has his own reasons for not wanting to go and he'll stand by them if it's the last thing he'll do.

"I told you I ain't fuckin' going, alright? You can go with your friends and you can have fun and dance with them but I'm not going. Stop pushing me on this."

His voice comes out hard and unwavering, leaving no room for argument. Also, you can't believe he just called you pushy. Bakugou, who forced a confession out of you just because he wanted you to say it first. He underestimates your persistence though, because next thing he knows, you're leaning down like you're about to kiss him and his eyes are already half-lidded but instead you bite down harshly on his nose.

Bakugou yelps but that doesn't deter you. "Can you at least tell me why you don't want to go? Because you don't want to go to a lot of things with me but you always end up going anyway. Like the nail salon, or Bath and Body Works. Why's it different this time?"

His eyes narrow and he shifts beneath you, probably trying to escape your shit fuck ton of questions but you're caging him in. He stays quiet for a whole three minutes when he finally says, "I just don't want to go, fuck, can't you just let it go and compromise for fucking once?"

What. "What?"

“I’m just saying,” Bakugou sneers, propping his elbow up below his head, “you shouldn’t be forcing me to go. You said it yourself, ya know, it feels like I’m always doing what you want.”

You falter. "That's bullshit, Katsuki. You're being really mean right now."

It seems that you used the wrong choice of words because his face turns gloomy, and you can tell he’s biting the inside of cheek as hard as he can. He places his forearm over his eyes so he can physically block out your reaction when he practically spits, “Why don’t you go date golden boy Kirishima if you think I’m so mean, huh?”

Woah. That was a low fucking blow and he knows it. He regrets bringing up his best friend’s name the moment the words leave his mouth because the way you inhale sharply and get off of him fearing for his life. The hairs on his arms rise when you start speaking to him scoldingly, and he won't even deny that he deserves it.

“I cannot believe you’re still using that against me, ‘Suki, that was more than a year ago! And don’t give me shit about not knowing how to compromise because I always eat the food you make. Even when you make it spicy on purpose even though you know I can’t handle it. And you know what? I don’t particularly like going to the gym with you on the weekends, but I still always go! And maybe sometimes I wish we could have more than just study dates but I stay and read with you anyway. And I always, always, forgive you when you do stupid shit like forgetting our anniversary or- or when you make me cry."

Almost as if your body takes cue from your words, you can feel a familiar stinging sensation creep up behind your eyelids. It starts a chain reaction because somehow Bakugou barrels on. Even though his face blanches when he sees the water on your lash line, he can’t seem to stop his mouth from moving.

"Well, fuck, sorry I'm such a shitshow to handle, princess. You knew what you were getting into when you agreed to date me. But if you’re so tired of me already, then why don't you just break up with me, huh?"

No longer was there a trace of affection or playfulness in the way he calls you ‘princess’. The word drips with condescension and malice and your heart cracks a bit at the way he speaks about himself. Bakugou's sitting on the bed now, looking up at you as you stand before him.

Yet, your gaze holds nothing but warmth and frustrated tears when you look at him. Because, much to your dismay, you also always know when there’s something up with Bakugou . He leans away for a moment when your hands come up to touch his head, but decides to let himself fall into your touch in the end.

Bakugou buries his face against your stomach, gripping onto the back of your shirt with crumpled fists. Gently, your hand cards through his messy hair, “Baby, I never said that. I never said you were hard to deal with. You’re a very easy person to deal with, and an even easier person to love. And I have never, ever, thought about leaving you. Okay? I’m sorry for making you think that."

He nods into you, the movement tickles your abdomen and he does it again and again until you start giggling and pushing his head away. Bakugou rests his chin against your navel, looking up at you with slightly glassy eyes. He knows he doesn’t deserve the kindness you’re laying onto him, doesn't deserve you in general, but he still reaches up to swipe a thumb under your eye.

“No, I was out of line. I shouldn't have said all that. I’m sorry, I was bein’ rude as shit.”

The truth is, Bakugou isn't really that easy to deal with. You can handle him just fine because you've had years of practice. To an untrained eye, maybe it'll look bad for him when he scoffs a fuck off everytime you ask to hold his hand. But you know he never means it because he always takes your hand anyway, intertwining his fingers with yours. And then he'll squeeze your hand three times; i love you, i love you, i love you.

So no, he isn't easy to deal with. His body language and words don't always correspond to what he's trying to convey but it's still plainly obvious that he quite stupidly adores you anyway. He'll yell at you for forgetting your wallet, he'll call you an idiot the whole day and then he'll pay for your lunch and walk you home the same day. If you get cold for forgetting a cardigan, he'll tease and taunt you for a whole five minutes maximum before giving you his own that he just somehow keeps forgetting to take out of his bag, as he says. He'll make a face like he just ate a lemon when he tries and fails to not make fun of you if you don’t score so well on a test, and then he’ll tutor you for hours on end until you can get it right.

It gets quite predictable.

He pulls you down then, letting your bodyweight sink onto his lap and presses a kiss against your lips in apology and you hate that it works. Hate that he can erase every mistake with a press of his lips to yours, because he never kisses you without meaning it. And you know he means to say sorry with the way his tongue slips into your mouth.

Unfortunately, the argument does not end.

He pulls away, breathing heavier than before. The bubble of calmness and comfort around you bursts explosively however when he mutters, “‘M still not going to the prom, though.”

It's not like you didn't see this coming. You knew that he didn't really care about prom, no matter how badly you wanted him to. You just thought that maybe he'd take you anyway. The thought of going without him makes your chest clench because you could have the time of your life with your girls but it won't feel the same without him next to you.

Maybe he's right. Maybe you do make him do things he doesn't really want to. But then again, you do the same for him. You're left confused and defeated when it's time for him to leave and he's still adamant on not going. On one hand, you don't want to force him to go. But on another, you really do wish he'd change his mind.

You're silent as you show him out, and he notices but he stays quiet too and in his head, he beats himself for being a coward. He hates himself for not being able to talk to you properly. He knows very well that if he just told you what's up with him then you'd understand, and you could still probably convince to go to the dance. But he doesn't speak up.

Right before he leaves, he leans down to kiss you goodnight but you turn away at the last moment so his lips meet your cheek instead. Slowly, you press a palm against his heart, pushing him away and pretending you can’t hear how it stutters at your denial.

"Hey, before you go, I'm sorry if I'm being pushy again but you-,” your voice trails off, and you sigh defeatedly, “you can't keep making me cry and just expect to kiss it better all the time, okay? And I know you don't mean to do it, but it still hurts, Bakugou. I'm tired of getting hurt all the time and I'm not forcing you to go, but I hope you know that it really fucking sucks that my own boyfriend won't go to the dance with me, and it sucks even more that he won't even tell me why."

Bakugou? What happened to Katsu or ‘Suki, he mourns internally. He keeps a blank face but it feels like the blood within his veins just got replaced with pure fucking ice as he lets your words sink in. He refuses to let his facade break but it feels like someone is grabbing him by the throat and he can’t seem to breathe right.

"If you keep making me feel like this, one day I'm not just gonna let you kiss it all better. 'Cause sooner or later, you're gonna run out of chances."

Bakugou stays unanswering, and you look at him pleadingly for him to just talk to you but he doesn't. It's not until you go to close your door that he finally speaks, voice soft but accusing, "You just said you've never thought of leaving me, and now just 'cause I'm not taking you to some stupid dance, you're taking it all back?"

If Bakugou had superpowers, pissing you off would definitely be one of them. You resist the urge to stomp your foot childishly, because you know that won't help to get your point across. Your teeth bite down on nothing as harshly as possible because you don't want to start arguing again, it won't solve anything. He knows that too, and even though your hands stay right by your side, he feels like he was just punched in the jaw when you meet his eyes and he finds that somehow, he managed to make you cry twice in one night.

"Has it ever occurred to you that maybe this isn't just some stupid dance to me? I get it, okay, that it's not your scene or whatever, and it doesn't matter to you but it really matters to me," you tell him as placatingly as possible, and his eyes are as clouded as his judgement, "I've waited a long time for this, and I never thought I'd even be lucky enough to have someone who means so much to me to go with. And if you can't even see how important it is to me that I want you with me at this stupid dance, then you're the worst. The worst."

With that, you finally shut the door in his face. His muffled protests behind the slab of wood go ignored in favour of stomping back to your room. Bakugou's insufferable! He's stupid and stubborn and temperamental. He's a hothead that jumps headfirst into anything he does with everything he's got.

He's the worst. (he's the furthest thing from it)

⚝ ⚝ ⚝

Neither you nor Bakugou give in to the temptation of calling one another. When you see him in class, you don't look at him and you go straight home. The both of you being too stubborn to admit defeat by reaching out first. It hurts to admit though, that for once you wish he'd just call you. A mere three days of radio silence on both your ends doesn't do wonders for your relationship, it chips away at both of you until the hurt simmmers to a seemingly numb feeling in your hearts.

As you think of ways to spite him, your mind comes up with the idea of going with someone else. But you don't entertain that thought for longer than a second, because that would be cheating and you'd never stoop that low. He probably wouldn't even know if you did anyway.

The night before the prom, you sit on your bed forlornly, twirling the little charm bracelet that slings around your wrist. It's a cute thing that Bakugou gifted you a few months ago. It was a simple purple band with two star charms on its ends and a little saturn charm in the middle. He has a matching one in blue.

"It's beautiful, 'suki. Why saturn?" You had asked.

"Uh... I don't- I read somewhere that it kinda symbolises growth and commitments. And you know, that fits us." Katsuki answered, withholding the fact that he spent three hours reading multiple astrology sites about it even though he quite frankly thinks it's bullshit but didn't want to get the meaning wrong anyway.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. ‘Cause I wanna fucking commit to you and I'm gonna be everything you’ll ever need.”

The bracelet jingles lightly as you fidget with it. Your phone lays on your bed with no signs of him calling and a deep crushing sigh escapes you as you prepare yourself for another night of tossing and turning. The memory of what the bracelet meant lulls you to sleep and you're left wondering if he's still wearing it too, which makes you wonder even more if he's missing you as much as you're missing him or if he's missing you at all. It's hardly noticeable but you think your cheeks feel damp as your eyes fall close.

⚝ ⚝ ⚝

In his own room, Bakugou lets the dumbbell he's curling fall to the floor. He barely hears the resounding thud it makes or his mom yelling at him for dropping the weight like that. He flops onto his bed, arms spread and neck spotted with sweat. His mind swims with thoughts of you and he wishes it wasn't so hard for him to just fucking open up to you. His insides twist just thinking about the way he left things with you, it makes him feel stupid and he hates it.

It's not like he doesn't want to take you to the prom. If anything, he'd love to do that. He wants to show you off so bad. Have you all pretty, draped over his arm and looking gorgeous in whatever dress you wanted to wear. God does he want to, he wants everyone to see you with him and he'd bask in his smugness that no one else gets to have you like this but him. He'd relish in the absolute envy on anyone else's face as that saw you with him. Because everyone knows, including himself, that you're too good for him. And now he's gone and fucked it all up.

For all the confidence he exudes, Bakugou Katsuki is actually not someone who's void of insecurities. If anything, his confidence is just a front to his crackling interior. But not always, because sometimes he is quite the hot shit. Anyway.

Contrary to your belief, he doesn't want to go to the prom for your sake. He's heard the things people have said about you- or rather, he's heard what has been said about you in regards to your relationship with him. Just thinking about it makes him feel nauseous all over again. He wasn't supposed to hear it, he thinks.

He'd been walking past the girl's toilet whilst looking for you. It wasn't on him that girls talk so fuckin' loudly. Like c'mon, in his defence, if you're going to talk shit about someone, at least do it quietly so that the person aforementioned won't hear his own name like a siren beckoning him to eavesdrop. So really, it's not his fault for pressing his back against the wall to hear the rest. He can't put a name to the two voices (why would he be able to) but from what they're saying, they know him apparently.

..."... I bet he's forcing her. To date him, I mean."

"I don't know... they seem pretty lovey-dovey and all gross to me. If you ask me, she should leave now and find someone better."

"That's called conditioning. Or like, stockholm syndrome. I mean, let's be serious, who wants to willingly date Bakugou of all people. He's like if the word aggression was personified. He's mental, I swear."

They laugh, gaudy.

"I bet he's gonna show up to the dance with the poor girl, 'cause he's way too fucking clingy. Have you noticed that he's practically by her side almost 24/7. Hope they don't turn up together, like give that girl a break."

So. He wasn't supposed to hear that. He wasn't supposed to fucking hear that, and for a good fucking reason. At that moment, it felt like his heart was stuck in his throat while simultaneously, his stomach dropped to his ass. He doesn't cry. He's not that bothered by it. But it makes his head spin that people actually think of him like that.

By then, he wasn't thinking straight, because if he was, then he'd know not to make assumptions about how everyone felt about him based on two girls' conversation. Alas, he's not thinking straight, so, fuck it.

He doesn't know if you remember but he barely said anything when he walked you home.

It hurt him, but everything they said about him wasn't anything he hadn't heard before. It was the way they talked about you that got to him. How you were unhappy or being forced, they said. It's the way he's tried his hardest to pour his heart and soul into you and him and it's still seemingly not enough for people around him to think that you're both undeniably gone for each other.

It makes him upset, because he thinks he's been doing a pretty good job at showing you just how much you mean to him, but apparently fuckin' not. He's obviously not doing something right. Which makes him feel frustrated because he can't figure it out. He tells you he loves you plenty. Okay, maybe not plenty but he does say it. He says it and he knows you know that he’s trying to show it in his own words. He always keeps a jacket for you, he’s never let you fail a test since you got together and he always always makes you extra food that he makes for himself. Maybe he’s done something wrong along the way.

It's not like he unintentionally made the food spicy for you. Sometimes it just slips his mind that your portion can't be the same level of spicy as his is. And he knows how sad you get when you fail an exam, which is why he forgoes normal dates to sit and study with you. Of course he'd much rather do something like hiking or fucking, he doesn't know, laser tag with you, but he'd always put your education first. He knows how much it means to you after all.

An ugly feeling nags at him. It makes him want to pull away from you, show some distance so people would stop talking for a bit. But another part of him wants to run to your house right now and tell you I'm sorry. please don't leave. I can do better. Neither of those feelings actually make him do anything, though, because he's stubborn and refuses to cave.

Ugh. He thinks, before promptly passing out on his bed.

⚝ ⚝ ⚝

The evening of the prom arrives. You're standing in front of your mirror, all dressed up and pretty. Your dress accentuates your curves amazingly and you've adorned your cheeks with small star-shaped rhinestones and sprayed a generous amount of body glitter all over yourself. The shimmer makes itself known in every crevice of your room but it doesn't bother you right now.

An imaginary Bakugou makes himself comfortable on your bed. He's eyeing you up and down and groaning appreciatively at the sight he's been blessed with. Fuckin' gorgeous, he says, just like you know he would if he were actually here. You're wearing his colours after all.

Your hands smooth down your dress incessantly for the nth time that night, as if getting rid of the imperceptible wrinkles on your dress would get rid of the thoughts in your head as well. It doesn't, but it makes you feel calmer. Maybe some would call it dramatic, or stupid, but you don't even really feel like going without him.

You don't want to miss out on your prom, and you still want to dance with your friends and eat cheap shitty food though. So maybe your hair droops a little, akin to your mood, but you leave your house shining and smiling anyway.

And when you get there, things start looking up. Whoever's in charge of the music has been doing an amazing job of not playing Closer by the Chainsmokers on repeat yet so that's win in your book. In fact, they're not playing any songs that would give the average retail worker war flashbacks, which means they're doing a phenomenal job.

The hall is mostly full by the time you and your friends find a table near the back. There's a line at the punch table and you can already tell that it's probably spiked with something judging by the students practically dry-humping one another on the dancefloor, much to one of the school's chaperone's dismay.

The first hour passes by without a hitch. The buffet table is lined with cheap pizzas, stale fries and other questionable foods like jello cups that you're not sure is even made with real jelly. But your friends eat it anyway and you do too because food poisoning's all part of the party package.

At the back of the hall, there's a photo booth with props and signs for everyone to take. Your friends and yourself take ungodly amounts of pictures at the booth, laughing loudly without a care in the fucking world. You don't let yourself think about how Bakugou would scoff at the choice of props, you refuse to let yourself think about how he'd pose after choosing something equally stupid and you absolutely do not let yourself think about how much brighter you'd be smiling if he were here with you. You don't.

The sound system blares songs from bands you're somewhat familiar with, the bass of the songs echo and reverberate throughout the dancehall. It amplifies the adrenaline running through your veins as you jump around with the rest of the people in the hall. It feels silly and unnatural but you're giggling and swaying and it isn't so bad when you've got your girls right next to you doing the same thing.

It's easy to forget about all the aches when you let yourself get lost in the crowd. You're pushed into the middle of the dancefloor that's definitely filled with people who don't go to your school.

A song that you vaguely recognise by The Weeknd plays over the speakers and it's so fast paced that your heart thumps to the bass of the song. The tremors echo through the hall, shaking the floor and it becomes so easy to forget why you were upset in the first place.

The song ends and cheers from half-drunk high schoolers fills the temporary silence that follows. The DJ announces that he's about to slow things down a little for a kick of romance. He stretches out the word romance so it sounds more like roooowmaynceee and when the music fades into something mellower, it becomes even easier to remember.

It becomes increasingly harder to ignore the pitiful glances your friends send your way as they're whisked away by their own dates. Humiliation and longing pools in your belly as you watch your friends get their waists held and their bodies swayed and it fucking sucks. Even though you wave dismissively at them, it does look quite pathetic when you slowly move to stand against the wall by yourself.

Your eyes sweep over the couples dancing, and you pray that no one asks you to dance while you're being a wallflower. You don't think you'd want to dance with anyone but him anyway. Distantly, your mind wanders to Bakugou, and you're left thinking about what he must be doing at this hour. Maybe he's studying, or watching a movie, or cooking something inedible like always. Maybe he's already asleep. Maybe he's missing you and he's on his way over here right now.

Nobody is crueler to you than yourself, you think, as you let your mind wander dangerously into that false pretence of hope that he might change his mind about showing up.

There's a phantom feeling that glides over your skin as you watch your friends dance, and you wrap your hands around your elbows to soothe it. The sweat from your earlier dancing cools off as the air in the hall gets cooler and you're not sure if it's the crisp, cold air, or the fact that you're painfully aware of Katsuki's absence that makes your throat sting each time you inhale.

⚝ ⚝ ⚝

In the end, Katsuki's mother is the one who quite literally knocks some sense into him. Mitsuki Bakugou is not a force to be reckoned with, ever, and as tough and cool Katsuki makes himself seem, he'll always be a little bit intimidated by his mom. It's why he tries to seem as nonchalant as possible as he sits on his couch while staring unblinkingly at the TV.

Mitsuki pops her head into the living room. Fuck, he didn't think she'd be home so soon.

"Katsuki? What the hell are you still doing here?"

"You going crazy, hag? It's a Friday night, am I not allowed to take a fuckin' break or what?" He swallows.

"Language, asshat. And I just stopped by Inko's, brat, I know what day it is today," she sighs annoyedly before plopping down next to him, "She tried to show me Every. Single. Photo of Izuku in his tux. I had to tell her I left the stove on to get out of there. So quit the bullshit. Why are you still here?"

Katsuki has a pillow in his lap and he squeezes it until his knuckles turn pale so his voice won't waver.

"She didn't want me to take her," he lies, hoping his mom will take the bait.

Mitsuki shoves her son's head to the side good-naturedly, "I thought I told you to quit the bullshit, brat. That girl adores the hell out of you for some fucking reason, so don't try to lie to me."

It's that one goddamn line that has him snapping at her. It's her words and the stupid girls in the stupid fucking toilet and it's an amalgamation of everything that has him wanting to tear his fucking hair out that makes him lose it.

"Yeah, okay, fuck you too mom. You're right, I don't fucking know why someone like her wants to be with someone as fucked up and angry and- and mean and aggressive as I am too, alright? Everyone at school already fucking wonders why she even wants me so I didn't take her to this stupid fucking prom 'cus maybe they'll get off my back about fucking forcing her to be with me. I'm not in the goddamn mood to be hearing about this shit so fuck off. I wish I knew what the fuck she sees in me that's so good but I don't so just stop this fucked up interrogation, God."

He's not even looking at the TV anymore. He spits out his outburst while staring straight at his hands fisted in the poor pillow. It'll never uncrease now. His jaw is clenched so tightly he's scared his teeth might just shatter in his mouth. He doesn't want to look at his mom right now, too afraid to see her pitiful gaze directed at him. Doesn't want to hear her say you're right Katsuki, I don't know what she sees in you either.

Katsuki braces himself for an impact, knowing he's probably about to get smacked for talking to her like that. He doesn't expect the hand that gently lands atop his head, and he doesn't expect the hand that's curling behind his ears to turn his head towards her. Mitsuki looks at her son, making sure he really looks at her this time.

"Katsuki." She says, as gentle as the first time she held him in her arms. It doesn't matter how many years have passed, he looks just as small to her right now, and just like the day he was born, she will wrap him up and make sure he knows how loved he is.

"Katsuki, listen. I'm sorry for saying that," Mitsuki exhales, "It was a joke, but it was insensitive and I'm sorry. Every other time I said something like that about you wasn't true either. You're a good son and a good student and a good person. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, or says about you because the people who truly care about you know that you're a good fucking person, Katsuki."

Katsuki can barely hold eye contact with her. As embarrassing as it is, his vision blurs over and he will never acknowledge the way his voice breaks. "Mom," he shudders, "I'm always trying so fucking hard. I want to be good, please."

A noise that sounds like a choked back sob escapes him unwillingly. Mitsuki pulls his face into her shoulder and smiles when he barely resists. He fits just like he did before he thought hugging her wasn't cool anymore.

"You are good. You are so good, Katsuki." she whispers, "You always help to cook, and you keep the house clean and your grades up. You don't speak politely but you are honest and you are just like me. You use your hands, actions, to communicate rather than words. But you know, Katsuki, sometimes the people we love need to hear it from us too, okay? We'll both work on that."

A miniscule nod. "I'll start right now, Katsuki. You may be a brat sometimes, but you are my son. My sun. You are good, and kind and for everything you do not love about yourself, I love it tenfold."

He absolutely does not break at that. Katsuki bites back a whine, and exhales shakily again, soaking in her words like a sponge because he knows these moments for them come few and far in between. He doesn't mind. He thinks it's special that way, cherishing it whenever it does happen even more.

Mitsuki cards her hands through his hair, "You're a winner, Katsuki, that's why you have your name. Don't let whatever happened get to you like this. If you don't go to that stupid prom, you'll be making the biggest mistake of your life. Because I love you very much, and it might even be possible that that girl of yours loves you just as much, or maybe even a smidge more. Get your ass changed, and talk to her, alright? I know it's scary, letting someone in, but you care about her and you need to do this."

Katsuki pulls away from her, wiping his face roughly with his arms. He sniffles harshly, trying to erase all traces of the vulnerability he just showed. He bites his lip hard enough to almost draw blood. He wants to say he loves her back but the words fail him. Not yet, he thinks.

"I don't know what colour her dress is." He says instead.

"Wear your red suit. Don't ask questions, go get ready. You're already late, I'll call a cab for you."

Katsuki nods, getting up to walk to his room. He's halfway up the stairs when he pauses for a second. "Thanks mom. Love you."

Mitsuki waves her hand dismissively in his direction.

Katsuki stands in front of his mirror, inspecting everything he sees as if that'll change the way he feels about himself. His mom talking to him helped a lot, but he's still finding it hard to breathe and it's not just because his collar is choking him a bit. He fiddles with his bracelet. He tries to ground himself as he thinks about whether he should put on a different suit.

He really wishes he listened to what you were saying when you were talking about your dress. What if he shows up and his suit clashes with your dress? That would just make your night worse.

It's ridiculous. He knows he's just procrastinating. Because thinking about suit colours is easier than thinking about the crippling insecurity that still sits heavily on his shoulders, shackling him with the sheer weight of it all. He'd rather think about the colour of your dress than the fact that he feels like he can't give you what you deserve in a boyfriend.

His reflection frowns back at him.

The words you said play in his head like a broken record. You are the worst, you told him. He thinks of all the things he never really says to you because for some reason his emotionally constipated self just can't bring himself to say them. (Because he says I love you, but he means he hopes you never trip on your shoelaces if they're untied, that your hair never tangles in the wind, that if your drink spills not a drop of it would touch you, that your hands are always warm, that you'd never forget to bring your headphones before you leave the house and that you're always safe whenever he's not with you. Because he says I love you, but he means he hopes that if the sky were to drizzle, the raindrops themselves would feel privileged just to be able to fall upon your skin. Because he says I love you but he means he hopes you know he wants to say it right to your face, and into your mouth and kiss the words and every version of it's meaning into the space where your shoulder meets your neck every morning when he wakes up and every night before he lets himself succumb to slumber. He says I love you, but he means more than what those words convey. He says I love you, but he means stay warm, stay safe. He says I love you but he means my heart belongs more to you than me. He says I love you but he means he'll never want anything else for as long as he lives if it meant you'd always stay with him. He says I love you but he means come home to me and keep coming home to me, please.)

Oh.

If he could kick himself for being so stupid, he would. But he can't so he'll let you do it for him instead. I am not a coward, he tells himself as his unsteady hands try to make his hair look less of a mess. It doesn't work so he leaves it be and dashes out the door with an undone tie around his neck and he hastily side-hugs his mom- dodging her attempts to groom him- before throwing himself into the cab.

He doesn't make it a habit to show up late, but hopefully this time you'll forgive him. This time showing up late is better than not at all.

He's never made it a habit to show up late but maybe this time showing up late is better than not showing up at all. He drums his fingers nervously on his thigh throughout the entire ride. He hopes to God you're having fun. He hopes you know he's on the way. He hopes, and hopes and prays that he hasn't lost his chance.

When he arrives, he doesn't even spare a glance for his own friends, too preoccupied with finding you. The hall isn't very big but the space is large enough that he has to walk around a few times just to spot you.

The minute he sees you leaning against the wall, he wishes desperately he could go back in time. He'd do fucking anything to erase that faraway look in your eyes. He can see the way you're yearning to be one of the couples on the dancefloor and he wants to unwrap your hands around yourself and replace it with his own.

Katsuki breathes in deep and makes his way towards you cus damn it, if you wanted a dance, he'll give you a fucking dance alright.

⚝ ⚝ ⚝

The last slow song finally slowly tunes out, transitioning into a more upbeat one. The couples finally disentangle themselves from one another and you're just about to step back onto the dancefloor when a very familiar pair of arms snake around your waist.

You didn't even see him come in. It doesn't matter how he apparated here, because the only thing that matters right now is the fact that he showed up and the way his arms fit snugly around your hips. A breathless sound of disbelief escapes your lips as he pulls you into him when you turn around to face him.

If he's surprised by the lack of anger or disappointment on your face, he doesn't show it. All he knows is the feeling of your arms coming up to rest up on his shoulders. With the way you're beaming up at him, anyone would think that the only thing he did was show up almost two hours late. He knows better though, he knows he fucked up when all you wanted was for him to bring you to this stupid dance. And on God, would he try his hardest to make it up to you.

Katsuki leans into you, burying his nose into your hair that's all pinned up and pretty. He's getting glitter all over his face and suit and he doesn't care at all.

"I'm sorry," he exhales, letting the apology spill out of him, "'M so fuckin' sorry, princess."

It's so quiet, you almost think he never said it at all. In the background, you can just barely register the lyrics of Paramore's Still Into You that's currently playing. A litany of 'thank yous' is mentally conveyed to the DJ.

"And what are you sorry for?"

Katsuki clenches his jaw, his eyes darting away from yours like he's struggling not to look away. He groans before telling you, "There’s been rumours going on, people talking shit like they know us. Saying fuck all, running their fuckin’ mouths about how you could do better than me. And it’s stupid that I believed them for even a millisecond, I know. Then I realised that if I let you show up here alone then i’d just be proving those fuckers right. So, you win, princess. I took you to this stupid prom. I showed up, ‘m here right now."

Even though it's been said before, the lack of confidence Katsuki has in himself is absolutely baffling. It's like he can admit he has flaws and weaknesses and he'll know exactly what the problem is but he won't fucking talk to you for some reason you can't figure out.

Nvermind, you figured it out.

He's scared. Bakugou Katsuki is fearless. He's not afraid of anything, because he knows everything he's afraid of can be defeated one way or another. His fear of failure is conquered with his efforts in order to secure success. His fear of inferiority to anyone that's a threat towards him can be overtaken by brandishing his own achievements like a sword, or like armour. But when you come along, suddenly it becomes: Bakugou Katsuki was fearless.

The only thing he's scared of is losing you. That’s something that he alone can’t control, because you could very well decide to leave him if you ever felt like it. He realises that if he didn't show up tonight, the chances of that happening would be much much higher, and then if he lost you, he'd be a loser. Bakugou Katsuki is not a loser.

Your chest tightens at the thought that he actually believed that you’d leave him for someone better, as if someone like that even existed. One of your hands reaches up to curl around his neck, forcing him to look at you. You shake your head firmly when he tries leaning away.

You’re glad your voice remains steady when you say, "You should've talked to me. ‘Suki, I can’t believe you almost blew me off because of some shit some people we don’t even know thought about us. They don’t know anything about us, alright? They don’t fucking know how good I have it with you and you shouldn't keep all that to yourself next time, okay?”

His grip tightens, “You should’ve heard them though. Girls are fuckin’ ruthless. Talking about how easily you could just fuck off and get with someone better. Saying I... I'm forcing you to be with me. Fuck, it made me feel like shit ‘cause I knew there was some truth in what they said. I know I can stand to be nicer to you.”

Your hands find their way to his undone tie and you tug, “Katsuki, I don’t care about what they said. You hear me?”

Once he nods, you go on, "I couldn't do any better than you, because you're already the best. You said it yourself. If you think I deserve better, then be better, 'cause I don't want anyone but you. So stop trying to push me away. Whoever started all this can fucking eat our asses 'cause clearly they don't need their mouths if all they're gonna do is talk shit."

"Holy fuck, you really need to stop spending so much time with me." Katsuki snorts.

With a laugh, he twirls you around two times all while complaining that you're starting to sound exactly like him. But you’re not so sure he really minds so much judging by the way he grins wickedly at you. When his arms go back to their rightful place, you rest your forehead against his chest, "Also, let me? 'Suki, I did show up here alone. Which means that technically, you didn't really take me here, you know? 'Cause I had to come here all by myself."

Katsuki huffs and puffs, and leans back far enough to flick your forehead softly. He sways you slowly to the music, despite how fast the music is, "What matters is that I'm here. I’m fuckin' sorry for making you show up here all alone. Look, I’m even dancing with ya, ain’t that enough?”

Am I enough?

Katsuki says all that like he's exasperated with you but really he's posing it as a question. He's asking, and looking for a chance to redeem himself. Like always, you rest even more of your weight against him, knowing you can let yourself go boneless against him and he'll hold you all the same. He's all strong and soft and sturdy and you can hear his heartbeat thundering beneath his clothes and you make sure he can hear you when you say, "You've always been more than enough."

You can feel the way any lingering tension escapes him when you tell him that. He tells you softly, promises you that he'll start opening up more to you, and he kisses you on the cheek to really seal it in. The song echoes throughout the room, thrumming in your veins and making you feel weightless.

Some things just, some things just make sense and one of those is you and I.

His eyes don't waver as he really takes you in, savouring the image of how good you look. He sears the image of you into his brain and he hopes you know how serious he means when he rasps, "Fuck, ya look gorgeous by the way. Absolutely fucking stunnin' and I really fuckin' wish no one else but me could look at ya." His hands run down your sides slowly and squeeze at your hips, eliciting goosebumps all over your skin.

Heat quickly floods your cheeks and pools in your tummy, and his hands tighten his hold on you. You grin at him, "Well, ignoring your tie, I think you look very handsome as well. I'm surprised our colours didn't clash."

Katsuki barks a laugh at that. If only you knew.

It's quite the scene to see you and him swaying gently to such a hyped up tune. Everyone mostly crowds up around the front of the hall. But you and Katsuki hang back from the big mass of sweaty bodies, choosing to stand nearer to the opposite end of the room. If your friends look at you weird, you don't take notice. It's as if you're in your own little world; just you and him.

The second chorus sounds and Katsuki dips you as low as he can get before you yell at him. When you come back up, he's looking at you all starry eyed, staring directly at your lips. He can't stop himself, he cuts you off while you're singing along to kiss you right then. He swallows the little 'mmphrh!' that comes out of your throat greedily, sliding one of his hands up your back all the way to the cuff of your neck to press you even closer into him.

"Fuckin' missed you and your pretty fucking mouth, baby." he sighs breathlessly into you.

It's barely a chaste kiss, looking quite messy for a high school prom. Thankfully no staff member comes in between you and him, so he pulls away slowly before leaning back in. He kisses you once, twice and then some more and even a fifth and sixth time, like he's making up for all the days he didn't.

After he's satisfied with all the kisses he's peppered on your face, he leans away, smiling sillily. "She's right, you know?"

Your eyebrows furrow but your lips quirk up anyway, "What are you talking about?"

Katsuki spins you slowly, "The singer. She's right," and leads you back into him before singing monotonously, "After all this time, I'm still into you."

"You are such a loser, that was so cringe. Oh my god, what the fuck," you laugh, but your heart squeezes in affection.

Katsuki doesn't know if it's the haphazardly hung disco ball and the flashing lights that makes your eyes shine and sparkle or if it's just you, but he can't tear his eyes away from you. You're looking at him like he split the oceans for you, and he thanks every star in the sky that you're letting him hold you this close again.

If he knew how unreal you’d look when you’re dancing in his arms, he never would’ve ditched this thing. What a shame, he thinks, that he missed out on two whole hours that could have been spent with you looking like this. Maybe it’s the air in the hall but he feels practically giddy at the sight of you enjoying yourself, and it makes his heart fucking leap because it’s him that’s making you smile like that.

The sides of his mouth hurt from how much they've been stretched tonight, but he can't keep the smile off his face when you say, "You're right though. She is right."

He hums along to the tune, because denies it as he may, he absolutely loves this song just as much as you do.

Your eyes drink up the sight of Katsuki dressed up so… in character. His hair is as messy as ever, his tie hangs loose and undone around his neck and you’re sure his suit jacket has seen better days but he looks fucking ethereal to you. He’s all lethal grins and loud laughter and his cologne smells as spicy and warm as it always does and you realise again just how in love you are with him.

Katsuki’s eyes are gleaming, and maybe it’s just a trick in the light but you’re reminded of just how lucky you are to have him like this. Because maybe he is brash and harsh when he talks to you, but he’s never treated you like you’re anything but the most important thing in his life. To him, you’re his favourite person in the whole world, and he doesn’t need to say it out loud because he knows you know it too.

So maybe Katsuki isn't easy to read, or deal with. That doesn't mean he's not easy to love. Because loving him was like breathing— instinctual and  inevitable. You loved him the way the moon loved the ocean, and the way the sun loved the stars. Loving him was the easiest thing you've ever done in your life, and you knew that wasn’t ever going to change.

And baby even on our worst nights, I'm into you. Let 'em wonder how we got this far, 'cause I don't really need to wonder at all. Yeah, after all this time, I'm still into you

⚝ ⚝ ⚝

(extra)

Later, when the two of you have sufficiently made out against the wall enough for the chaperones to flick water at Katsuki so he'll finally pull away, you'll find his hand and pull him along to the rest of your friends.

Kirishima will see you two and laugh, telling Katsuki he's glad he pulled his head out of his ass. Katsuki will hiss, "Kay why ess..." and drag you to the photo booth. You won't tell him, but you're secretly glad that you were right. He does scoff at the assortment of props but he picks up a stupid styrofoam emoji of a bomb.

He pushes you into the booth and sets the timer for the picture. Right as it's about to go off, he looks at you very seriously as he says, "You put the boom-boom into my heart," before absolutely smashing the emoji against your cheek.

"KATSU I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU-"

The photos come out blurry and you're wide-mouthed and laughing in all of them. He's looking at you like you're the only thing that exists. There’s barely any inches between you and him like you’re the sun and he’s every planet that orbits your celestial body.

Katsuki walks you home afterwards, laughing and stealing your body heat as he delivers you to your doorstep. When you kiss him goodnight, he thinks he must have known you in every life before this one for him to have the capacity to love you as much as he does. He keeps his copy of the photo in his wallet, signing the back with 'still into you xx'.

Not that he needs the reminder.

[aclowntiny]

How Enhypen Act Around Their Crush (Gender Neutral Reader)

To usher in 7 more wonderful bois to this blog, the classic scenario I started the others with 😌 hope you enjoy, Engenes 💁🏻‍♀️➖

Jungwon

♡ Can be sort of obvious, depends on how you perceive his shyness 🤔 he may just come across as quiet, on the reserved side before he gets more comfortable.

♡ He always has a big smile just for you & he listens so intently, like his eyes will be on you the whole time. Will be so expressive, reacting to everything you say.

♡ Wants you to be his partner for everrrryyyy game you guys play. Sorry, I don’t make the rules, Jungwon does apparently 💁🏻‍♀️ but yeah, he comes up with a creative reason to recruit you every time, even if it doesn’t make much sense.

♡ He stumbles on his words quite a bit around you, especially when you catch him off guard. Things that catch him off guard include (but are not limited to): you calling his name all of a sudden, Jungwon looking over to see you smiling/laughing, you just being beautiful (all the time if your name is Yang Jungwon).

♡ Another potential tell is how giggly he can get around you 🫢 man acts like everything you say is funny plS. & tell him something he did was cute he’ll straight up MALFUNCTION

♡ Pretty much UNO reverse cards almost any compliment you give him. Tell him how kind he is no you. Tell him he looks nice today??? DHCVSSGCHSBFDWS no you

♡ If the other members tease you, he’ll pull the leader card so fast to get them to stop, sheepishly (hahaha 양 pun haha) apologizing for them & steering you a bit away (oh darn…that results in more time with you…oh noooo….😉) from the chaos. Unless you really like it/give it back to them, then he’ll just cheer you on like get em!!! (੭ˊ꒳ ˋ)੭

♡ You accidentally kicked him lightly under the table once & felt so bad, but Jungwon lightened the mood immediately & turned it into your little thing instead :3 so you guys pretty much always play footsie at dinner that’s just how you cutiepies flirt 😌

Heeseung

♡ He’s so sure he’s being super duper smooth with it, but it kinda shows tbh

♡ Literally trips over his own feet trying to help you once but it’s ok, it was cute ☺️ how could you not resist his eagerness??

♡ His goal one hundred percent is to make you feel valued, so your opinion is always taken into account. Suddenly, whatever you want to do is what Heeseung is voting for, too, especially if you’d have been the only one otherwise.

♡ Basically becomes your personal delivery boy. You want a drink? What kind? Heeseung’s already out of his seat, he’ll bring you one. You left your shoes? Oh, just stay there, Heeseung’s got it.

♡ When you talk to him, get ready to see Maximal Big Bambi Eyes™. Like, those things are going to be shining full of stars whenever they get to look at your wonderful face 🩷

♡ “What’s your favorite song? …Oh, no reason.” Heeseung then proceeds to make it his life mission to learn that song & sing it for you. May even…write you a song 👀 if he gets brave one day, maybe he’ll show it to you!

♡ Probably invites you to go get ramen with him because of course he does 😆 anything to have some one-on-one time though! He actually has an easier time that way, no pressure from other sets of eyes on him.

♡ May not initiate touch too much, but if you do he’ll look some of the happiest you’ve ever seen him 🥺🥰 that’ll probably encourage him to do a bit more with you as well!

Jay

♡ Thinks he’s super smooth but it kinda shows part 2

♡ He tries to show off more around you, taking on more challenges & trying to do things that make him look cool. “Oh, yeah, I can do that. Check this out!” If he fails, at least he can amuse you & laugh it off, getting more motivated for next time 💪🏻

♡ 5000% the guy who gives you his jacket when it’s cold (& revels in the way you look in his clothes 👀)

♡ If you laugh at his puns, A. Jay.exe will stop working, B. he’ll make that many more just to make you laugh, his chest swelling a little every time it works 😌

♡ Finds out you like something then does a ton of research on it so he can casually bring it up & be like ‘oh, you’re into that too? nice, had no idea 😎’

♡ Tries to make sure he’s standing next to you in pictures so he can see how you two look together 👀 probably also tried wearing your favorite color more too, just subliminal messages for when you see him & look back on those pictures 😌

♡ Probably the most obvious thing he does is how fiercely he defends you. If anyone teases or even slightly inconveniences them Jay’s ready to fight them for you. Even harder than he is when they tease him for his crush CGDVSCDSFCHVX

♡ Really casually breaks the touch barrier by sitting really close to you, your arms & sides brushing, but is dying on the inside especially when you scooch a bit & somehow end up even closer 💗

Jake

♡ Highkey really good at handling it, not making it obvious in an embarrassing way but dropping just the right amount of hints 😌

♡ He approaches you right away & asks questions to get to know you better, finding a way to relate to as many of your answers as he can.

♡ Definitely asks if you like animals & shows you pictures of Layla because the two of them are a package deal 😤 but of course you love her & gush over the pictures & Jake’s heart goes 💗

♡ Jake is always the first to congratulate you on a job well done, telling you did great even if it’s something as simple as completing a task on the game you’re playing together.

♡ Jake’s the kind of guy to send you songs he thinks you’ll like, please listen to them 🥺 & give them nice reviews especially if they’re love songs because that’s a hint!!!

♡ He will always open doors for you & pull out your chair for you because our Jake is a gentleman 😌

♡ Also the one who buys you random surprises, just cute things in your favorite color or themed like your interests that made him think of you (as if he isn’t always thinking of you)!

♡ The first time he really initiates contact, it’s sort of on accident 😅 you have something in your hair & he gently reaches over to take it out, then realizes what he does & apologies, a blush spreading across his face. His smile returns, though, when you tell him it was quite all right & thank him!

Sunghoon

♡ Doesn’t want to be embarrassingly obvious but, like, what’s the point if you don’t know, you know? 👀

♡ Strategically positions himself at gatherings so he can always have a good look at you if he isn’t talking to you.

♡ Lets you win whenever you guys are playing games because he loves seeing how happy you get, especially if you playfully rub it in his face. It builds a little joke between you two & gives him an excuse to play with you again for ‘revenge’!

♡ Enjoys being able to teach you things, partially for showing-off factor but mostly because it forges a connection between you two & shows that you can learn from each other.

♡ On the flip side of that, Sunghoon wants to try out your hobbies, too. Even if they don’t end up being his favorite, it’s a new experience for him to have under his belt & one more way to show his interest in you.

♡ Smirks a little if your eyes meet his from a distance, but the moment you look away he’s probably crashing into a wall or completely turned around so no one sees how red he is.

♡ If you wear a hat or glasses, he’ll probably steal them from you just to flirt. Coin flip if he just puts them on or if he takes something & runs so you chase him down for it. If he puts it on, he’ll say it looks better on you 😏

♡ He’s not super touchy-feely, so he’ll go with the flow on your signs there. If you’re a hugger, though, oh boy will he lean into that fact. Every greeting between you & Sunghoon will be a hug just because he can 😌

Sunoo

♡ Definitely could be more obvious, but internally he feels like with everything he does there’s a big flashing Las Vegas sign above his head that says ‘SUNOO LIKES YOU’.

♡ However his hints aren’t always that glaring like he feels like he laughs at everything you say, but also laughs quite a bit naturally so it can easily be seen as part of his naturally joyous personality.

♡ Lowkey his love language is food, like he’ll find out what your favorite candy is & then somehow alwaaaaayssss have some when he’s with you ☺️

♡ MUST be sitting next to you whenever possible. Once stole Heeseung’s seat next to you when he got up on the grounds of the couch being more comfortable than the chair he’d had to be in before.

♡ He really wants to know your favorite things, like your favorite movies, songs, ice cream flavor, etc. because then he can try them too & feel like he’s experiencing a little part of you through them 🥰

♡ Wants to take selfies with you every time you hang out!!! 🥺 what can he say, pictures capture good memories!

♡ Never more will you desire having a personal cheerleader, Sunoo has that covered. Everything you do is amazing in his eyes & he will tell you it’s impressive all the time.

♡ A little shy with initiating touch, but eventually when he feels more comfortable he’ll do little things like resting a hand on your arm as he asks if you’re ok or grabbing your hand to lead you places!

Ni-Ki

♡ Honestly one of the better ones at hiding it if he wants to, which he definitely does at first! Later on, though? Different story. He has to win you in the end right? 😤

♡ Definitely the type to try showing off a bit, like he’ll be the one that always wants to show you the choreographies they’re working on, giving his all even into his little demonstrations & immediately glancing for your reaction.

♡ Really loves it if you dance with him, whether it’s letting him teach you or just joining in on what he’s doing. He’ll get so smiley please dance with him lots!

♡ This boy lives for teasing you!!! He loves to imitate you playfully & fake-bicker with you, but it’s just because he wants to play around 🥺 if you ever seem upset he’ll stop & apologize right away.

♡ If you don’t speak Japanese, he’ll teach you some phrases, but only either super weird random ones or cutesy stuff he just wants to see you say.

♡ You’ll probably catch the others (read: Jake, Jay) teasing him for it at one point; even if the context escapes you you’ll just walk in & see Riki getting ready to throw hands 😂

♡ He brings it on himself a little bit because even if he’s pretty good at being nonchalant, he’s always near you, whether it’s following you around to chat or just taking a seat near you, any spot that gets him in your orbit.

♡ Probably tries the ol yawn-&-stretch the arm thing at least twice (fails once) on you 😭😂 if you look surprised, he’ll totally act like he didn’t know that was what he was doing 😅

[episims]

So here's my allowance for this long ramble about why that last pic is important to me. Thank you @esotheria-sims ❤️

I played Jonas' first round knowing he was in a horrid state. He had fled from a mutually abusive relationship fearing for his life (he's never properly admitted that) and must've gone through alcohol withdrawal on his trip to Foxfire. Instead of processing what had happened, he went right back to his old coping mechanisms: numbness and approval drinking and men.

And so he ran into Julian. At the time, Julian was quite disconnected from daily matters and frankly full of himself (as was Jonas). Some might remember that it quickly came up that Julian was some kind of prodigy working on top-secret research.

It made Julian very appealing to Jonas. How to put this in short... approval had only ever meant anything to Jonas when it came from someone with the correct status. He's pulled to authorities and power figures and nothing turns him on like a little power play (by his own rules). Never mind that he already burned his whole life down once by doing exactly that.

But, as history and Esotheria remember, Jonas was impatient and Julian wasn't ready to hop in the bed with a near stranger. So Jonas ended up at this bar to mope about getting struck out.

Cloud, on the other hand, was indeed dating Mel. It worked great for him! It had little potential for anything beyond a casual fling but that's how he prefers it, as carefree as possible. He's that kind of polyamorous person who likes to have all the fun but none of the responsibilities of relationships.

Of course it stang Cloud a bit that Julian kept turning him down, but it wasn't very different from a kid with a bag of candies being sour about not getting a lollipop. He'd be able to get over it.

So I had one sim power-tripping in a self-destructive way and another chasing a permanent sugar rush. But you got to believe it didn't even remotely cross my mind that they could hook up. They have different personalities and Cloud surely isn't a power figure while Jonas is pretty much the opposite of carefree.

Yet I found myself staring at Cloud swooning over Jonas at the same literal second he caught the first glimpse of him.

It was shitty for Julian, of course. He had developed a crush on Jonas, even though he had turned him down. But at this moment, it didn't matter. Cloud wasn't aware that Jonas had been out with Julian and Jonas was clueless that Cloud knew him.

That's the essence of this picture, I think. Cloud and Jonas reacted to each other instantly and undeniably, without having ulterior motives to do so. It was just their in-game chemistry and it was so easy to write, too! Because (even as this is a big cliché): it wasn't the kind of relationship they thought they wanted, but it was the relationship they needed to get off their personal mental treadmills.

With time, it proved to Jonas that an easygoing biologist with more poor jokes than ambition was the most special person he'd ever meet. And it proved to Cloud that facing problems and enduring hardship only made his relationships better, not worse.

For anyone who read all the way here, thanks for joining my Ted talk!

[24hlevi]

Hey, can you write a nsfw alphabet for arisu

hello! so sorry for how ungodly long this took, but here ya go! thank you for requesting 🫶

— Arisu NSFW Alphabet

Arisu Ryohei (Alice In Borderland) X Gn!Reader

Summary: a nsfw alphabet with arisu

Warnings: language, nsfw

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He is such a sweetheart afterward, will immediately ask if you need anything and makes sure you’re okay, won’t leave your side for a good while

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

For him, his hands because of him playing so many video games, he knows how to use them. For you, he can’t pick just one. One day it’s your thighs, the next it’s your lips. He can’t choose

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He can cum multiple times during the night and not get tired somehow

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He has a thing for maid outfits, but would never admit it to you

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Despite having literally no experience, he is a little nervous at first, but once he gets the hang of it, he isn’t stopping

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Missionary, he enjoys seeing your face as he pleases you

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He can be both depending on the mood, if you’re both drunk then he’s joking a little bit, but he’s usually more serious

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He is pretty decently groomed, not completely shaven, there’s a little bit there, mainly because he doesn’t like the feeling of nothing being there

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) He is incredibly intimate during it, he likes taking his time with you and expressing how much he loves you so so much

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He gets embarrassed at the thought of jacking off when he has you, but if you're away and he has even just a picture of you he's going to, only when he knows he won't be caught

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He definitely has a begging kink and a praise kink, clearly. also. pegging.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He likes to keep it in the bedroom, but he won’t be against getting a bj in a bathroom

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Seeing you wearing his clothes is a big one, it takes all of his willpower to not pounce the second he sees you, also when you get dominant with him, he immediately folds

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything with strong degradation, slapping, blood, he can't fathom the thought of possibly hurting you

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He loves when you give him head, while he's embarrassed at first, by the end he's gripping your hair and pushing your head onto him more. What he loves more is giving you oral, he would be there for hours if he could

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) He's more slow and sensual with it, he doesn't like going super fast and wants to take the time to show he loves you

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He's not one for quickies, but he wouldn't be against a quick one before he goes out somewhere or in a bathroom

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) Mainly yes, but there are some things he will straight up say no to

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) Probably 2 or 3 max, he's not that athletic obviously and doesn't have a whole lot of stamina but he tries his very best, making sure you feel good first before he does

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) He doesn't really use toys a lot, but he wouldn't be against using one on you, it just depends on what it is!

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He isn't one to tease a whole lot, but he definitely will in public until you ask him to go home with you

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) He’s normally pretty quiet, letting out short groans and whimpers until he's close to release which then he gets loud moaning without a care

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He would love to see you dress up specifically for him like a maid’s outfit of sorts, but he's too afraid to admit that

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) He's pretty average sized with a bigger girth than his length so he stretches you in all the right places with a long vein on the undercurve of him

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Once he is officially dating you, it's pretty high because he was so used to masturbating that he will take all the chances he gets with you

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

After making sure you're cared for and okay, he’ll fall asleep with you next to him, making sure you're asleep first before he does, so fairly fast

[boozoid-13]

Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective; If I Had A Nickle...

An examination of Ghost Trick's use of fridging.

(*Please note that this was originally intended for people who have not played Ghost Trick, so their is a bit of lore-dumping when it comes to characters & the story.)

BUT FIRST!... What is Fridging?

Women in Refrigerator Syndrome, or more commonly, Fridging, is a narrative trope in which a female character is either assaulted or killed as motivation for a more important male character. The term “fridging” was coined in referral to a now infamous Green Lantern comic in which the hero returns home to his apartment, only to find that his nemesis has killed his girlfriend, and stuffed her body in his fridge.

This is obviously bad writing, but why? It's bad because it uses an often major moment for said character to focus on someone else, and it is also just sexist by nature, even if unintentional.

Fridging in Action; Exhibit A: Alma

Who is Alma? She was the wife of Detective Jowd, mother of Kamila, and possibly a detective before supposedly being killed by either her husband or her daughter. It is revealed later that Yomiel, who is a ghost, rigged the surprise-birthday contraption to shoot her as an act of revenge against Jowd.

Notice how I wrote more about her death than who she actually was as a person? That is because the game provides nothing more for me to write about; she is introduced by her death, and though her family are clearly shocked by what happened, we learn nothing new about her through their grief other than that she was kind of like Kamila… Maybe?

After the Fate-Change at the very end of the game, which prevents her death from ever occurring, she gets roughly two lines of dialogue before walking off the screen, never to be seen again, and is not included in her own family photo.

(*Apologies for the poor photo quality.)

Fridging in Action; Exhibit B: Sissel

Who is Sissel? Sissel was the fiance of Yomiel; we know that Yomiel loved her a lot, naming the main protagonist, who is his cat, after her. We also know that she was very fond of him too considering she killed herself right after his death, with Sissel’s suicide note reading: “I’m coming to you, Yomiel.”

Like Alma, she is introduced by her death, though I’d argue that Sissel's death is even more tasteless as she doesn’t even get a cutscene, instead, both her existence and suicide are revealed via a block of text in Yomiel’s sad backstory.

In fact, Sissel is such a miniscule character that she doesn’t even appear after the Fate-Change or in the epilogue, let alone have a sprite I can use to make this segment less boring. Her only purpose is to be one of the many reasons why Yomiel hates the world.

How Does This Affect the Story?

Because Alma and Sissel do not have any personality to them, and we do not learn anything about them through the course of the story, it means that their deaths lack of the gravity that the moment demands due to the player not really caring about either of these characters.

An easy way to fix this, at least in my opinion, would be by having the people closest to Alma and Sissel talk about them more often; maybe when you first reach Lynne’s apartment, there could be a family photo with Jowd, Kamila, and Alma that you (*as Sissel) can knock over to get Kamila to examine and say some extra dialogue?

Maybe have Yomiel mention his literal fiance beyond one block of text? Just a thought.

Defence Against the Fridging Allegations

Point A: Ghost Trick has multiple male characters that are just walking plot-devices or puzzle pieces, for example: in chapter 5, there are two prison-inmates, C38 and C74, whose sole purpose is to get you from the first cell to Detective Jowd.

Point B: Implying that Sissel and Alma are unimportant to the story just because they exist inside another characters’ backstory would be false, both of their deaths have clear impact on the main cast, like in the case of Alma’s muder: of which is a major plot-point, and something that you as Sissel, the protagonist, have to help solve in the present of the game's narrative.

Point C: Ghost Trick plays with death in a comedic way on many occasions, one of the running gags is that Lynne cannot stop dying. Another played-for-laughs moment being when Missile, a tiny pomeranian, gets shot by a sniper rifle at point-blank range.

Arguing that their deaths should be more serious may not fit the tone of the game.

Defence Against the Defence

Counterpoint A: The first argument is true, however, it excludes that both prisoners C38 and C74 have backstories, personalities, and desires of their own (*their shared desire being to escape prison) unlike Alma and Sissel, of whom serve their purpose in the story, and are then promptly axed, disappearing without a trace.

Counterpoint B: I am not saying that Alma and Sissel are unimportant to the story, in fact, both of their deaths are major events in the plot of Ghost Trick, which is why it’s more annoying that they aren’t given more character beyond “Jowd’s wife I think” and “I love Yomiel!!!”

Counterpoint C: Though the game treats death rather lightly, both scenes have the standard dreery music associated with serious scenes, and are treated as tragedies by the main cast, thus, getting to know at least a little bit about these characters would impact the player in the desired way, of which I assume is shock or surprise.

I am not saying that the player needs to know Alma or Sissel inside and out, just that it would be nice to know something.

(...)

Conclusion

Ghost Trick is a spectacular game with a truly unique narrative and distinct style that makes it iconic even after the fourteen years since its debut, however, the game, accidentally or not, uses harmful tropes that worsen the quality of some of its most crucial scenes, and waste what could’ve been two interesting characters.

(*Thank you for reading, I know it's not the best lol)

[a-goumang-ripoff]

My Thoughts on the Character Writing of Nine Sols

Alright, it's finally time to autistically rant on this account to my heart's content because HOLY FUCK I LOVE NINE SOLS!!! It has such amazing gameplay, and I don't think I could ever forget the Lady Ethereal fight in my life, easily one of my favorite bosses ever (and I love how she's written but that's a rant for another day).

I think my favorite thing about Nine Sols is the fact that it's such a densely packed game where literally everywhere you look you can find some kind of underlying message, even in small areas. And every Sol has its own underlying message and you bet your ass you'll be seeing rants from me on probably every one of them eventually.

For now though I'm sticking with rambling about the general writing of the game because I love it but also hate it sometimes and I love this game so much that I need to rant about how much the parts I despise piss me off. Before I start ranting off though, I should preface with this: if you aren't aware, RedCandleGames is a Taiwanese game company whose previous game, Detention, contained an easter egg which mocked a member of the CCP, I think it is safe to say that Nine Sols can easily be interpreted as a massive hate letter to China wrapped up in a beautifully gruesome story with amazing gameplay.

This isn't something that screamed out to me when I first played, but I had a suspicion something like this might pop up because of the storyline with the humans, they're shown to be livestock to these Solarians with only Lady Ethereal objecting to them being harvested for their brains (and eventually Yi but it was also his idea). They're treated as lesser beings, subhuman if you will, that are feared, hated, and stereotyped, but shown by the game to not warrant any of that treatment and be entirely capable people. Something was going on but I was quite unsure what it was.

It wasn't until the Fengs, who I fought after Ji, that it really set in what a lot of these messages I've been noticing could be about. I am very well viewing all of this through a specific lens and I don't think I'm right about everything but I am certain to say that the Fengs are absolutely a hate letter to Chinese nobility, between the Fengs' lack of care about anything besides profit/entertainment and the fact that Nuwa has clearly endured the horrors of foot binding (mishappen feet + entirely unable to walk) while still being a spoiled brat, not to mention the incest.

Everything after that kind of fell into place, it's not all about Chinese culture and government, but things definitely started falling into place when I started thinking back on everything. It started to make sense why they made Goumang a fascist who quite literally owns slaves before giving her easily the most disturbing fate in the entire game.

I do really love Nine Sols for all these little messages, but I also feel like sometimes they entirely give up on writing a unique character in order to send a message with them. Yanlao, Goumang, Jiequan, Nuwa, and Eigong are all very basic tropes that either lack deeper character, or their deeper character motivations don't seem to line up with their character.

And what do I think these characters all have in common? They're all being used to send a message about culture and/or government. Yanlao's demand for respect and power just because he's old, Goumang's fascist ideologies, Jiequan's dynastic bloodline, Nuwa's wealthy apathy, and Eigong's drive for immortality and tendency to lie or bend the truth. It feels like their characters were made secondary to the message they were attempting to send. I can say this about Yi as well, he's a very typical edgy protagonist trope I see a lot in East Asian media, though his character development is really well written so I can overlook that.

Another thing I've noticed is that the characters I think aren't sending as strong of messages, or at least not messages geared towards criticisms of government and aspects of East Asian culture, seem to be a lot more well written, and a lot of the stuff I've seen in the Nine Sols community confirms that. People tend to love Ji and Lady Ethereal and enjoy Kuafu. Ji and Lady Ethereal are so amazingly written in my opinion, maybe it is just that I relate to them a bit too much, I just feel like their stories are really enjoyable and make you feel something other than "what the fuck just happened." Kuafu I feel is just inoffensively written, he's not super tropey, but he's not amazingly written either, so he's kind of just this inbetween spot that makes him enjoyable.

Also note that I haven't talked about any of the non-sol characters, most of them I have not thought about nearly as hard (except Heng but I will break down and sob if I ever try to talk about her in length lmao) and thus don't feel like I can safely comment on them with the same confidence as I've had for the sols.

I am not saying that RedCandleGames should've forgone writing the messages into their characters that they did write, I just feel like there could be more effort put into the actual characters themselves and going about these messages in different ways to majorly improve the experience of this game, not that it isn't already amazing. Well now that that's out of my system, I'm probably gonna be making more rants about different parts of Nine Sols because I love this game and I also enjoy ranting about the parts I dislike lmao, easily one of my favorite games ever.