#i have so many feelings about him and so many moments that people misinterpret that i want to correct

[cursedcola]

Prompt: "Will You Marry Me?"- Proposal Headcannons Characters: Everyone :) Part(s): Heartslabyul, Savanaclaw, Octavinelle, Scarabia, Pomefiore, Ignihyde, Diasomnia (Pt.1 !) (Pt.2 Here!) Fandom: Twisted Wonderland Warning(s): None. I mean, unless you don't want to marry any of them. Just don't read if that's the case. ALSO SLIGHT SPOILER FOR CHAPTER 7 IN SILVER Note: These are all if he is the one proposing btw. Also, I went overboard. I had to break Diasomnia into 2 parts because I exceeded tumblr's character limit. I have favorites I guess :/

This man is a child masquerading as an adult. As in to say that he resists any illogical emotions until they bottle up and explode. The traditional pathway for finding a life partner typically follows: stranger -> acquaintance -> friend -> crush -> lover ->partner. You know, as it normally goes when bonds form.

Sebek....is not a textbook case in this regard. His path is a bit more customizable

stranger -> person he is forced to interact with -> acquaintance of Lord Malleus -> Acquaintance of Lord Malleus that Sebek approves of -> Friend that Lord Malleus approves of -> Repressed Crush -> Acquaintance that Sebek avoids at all costs -> Acknowledged crush -> Acknowledged crush that Lord Malleus approves of -> Respected individual with mitigated interactions -> Courting -> awkward situationship -> lover -> awkward situationship (with better communication) -> spouse

Enough said.

This process isn’t as complicated as it may seem on paper. While there are many steps, Sebek is fortunate enough to have people in his life willing to force commitments onto him. It also helps that he has blind trust in a select few. This makes him a bit naive and easily influenced. A boon in the right hands, and a bane in others.

In short, Sebek is emotionally constipated and only acts when there’s a driving force. Otherwise he just gets frustrated. This is extremely apparent at two stages: ‘repressed crush’ and ‘awkward situationship’. Scratch that. Three stages.

Beginning at ‘repressed crush’ - Sebek realizes that he likes you when you ask about how his training is going. He happened by your dorm during his morning jog, and was more than happy to go off on a tangent of the strict regimen developed to forge a perfect knight.

Except that’s not what you wanted to hear. You were more interested in his health and how he was enjoying himself rather than how his work was benefitting Malleus.

His heart fluttered, as if a shock of electricity thrummed through his body. Having never felt this before, Sebek mistakes it for a lapse in his strength and runs off at a much faster speed than before. Forget a light jog, he had enough energy to run 500 laps around the school track.

Don’t you get it human?! You were distracting him! His body was at rest too long. Now shoo, you’re hindering him from doing his duty.

He represses these budding romantic feelings and ‘misinterprets’ them as deviant behavior. He even goes so far as to blame it on ‘useless hormones’ and convinces himself that it’ll pass. He spares it no thought until his pining becomes apparent to everyone except for himself

Que the driving force. Despite Sebek believing otherwise, he does have friends and his entire love-life can be credited to their affectionate stupidity.

Simply put, Ace takes every chance to seamlessly flirt with you whenever Sebek is around. Not in a subtle way either - he's making some risky comments and trying to eat up every moment of your time. The others in your year are well aware of what he's doing too. Deuce thinks he's being unnecessary, but also agrees that Sebek needs a push so he lets it happen. Epel has his gripes with Sebek, but admires him for his manly tenacity. So he's 100% in support of giving an extra push and even tries to copy Ace. Except... yeah, he's pretty bad at flirting so he gives up after one try. Jack is against it at first, not wanting to hurt your feelings in the process but gets talked into it after seeing you get salty over Sebek being distant. Ortho, bless his innocent soul, thinks of it as a fun experiment. Lil guy just wants everyone to be happy.

You have no idea though, which is great because all of Ace's attempts fail hardcore. Sebek and his chivalrous ways (jealousy) won't stand by if you're being constantly bombarded with 'unwanted' romantic affections.

Nevermind that you don't seem to be taking Ace seriously at all. It is still not proper behavior! It would be a stain to his Lord's image if Sebek knowingly let Malleus' beloved friend endure such a hardship.

Every time Ace makes an attempt, Sebek shuts him down faster than you ever could. You have no idea how he does it, but Sebek is always around when it happens. The timing is honestly creepy....until you catch on to what's happening because the Ramshackle prefect isn't a dumdum.

"So....prefect, how about we go get dinner together tomorrow? Just you and me, what do ya say?" Ace slides into the seat to your right during breakfast. He leans in on his fist, eyeing you with a mischievous grin that crinkles the heart on his cheek. Just as he does, Sebek occupies the seat at your left and pushes Ace back with his palm.

"Do you ever rest?! They will do no such thing, now eat your meal before it runs cold. The chefs worked too hard for their efforts to be wasted by a delinquent!" Sebek answers on your behalf like clockwork. This event was not an uncommon sight to anyone, neither was Sebek failing to control his volume, so no other student paid the show any mind.

Normally you'd let them spit a few words at each other before returning to their own devices. Yet letting this continue just felt cruel, especially knowing that Ace was doing it to get a rise from your friend. Although Sebek wasn't innocent in the matter either

"Alright - Ace, would you knock it off? You don't even like me that way so quit messing with my head. I thought you were better than this," you say in between bites, side-eyeing your friend with a disapproving glare "And you!" you turn to Sebek, "I can answer for myself. Why do you even care? It's not like you're in charge of my love life. Just because someone wants to date me doesn't make them a delinquent...sheesh"

Why...why does he care? Sebek short circuits at your scolding, opening and closing his mouth to rebuttal yet coming up with nothing. Angered by his own turmoil, he grabs his meal and goes to sit with others from his dorm.

Stupid human. How dare you be so haughty and ungrateful? He was just protecting you from....from, what exactly? It's not like you going out with Ace would impact him in any way. It's not like you were in danger or upset with his advances. If anything. he was doing a good job at keeping your relationship professional for the sake of his liege!

Go ahead and date that childish hooligan for all he cares! Sebek won't be there to protect you when you're lost, or lend you a scarf on cold winter days. Ace can be the one to call you before bed every night, and keep your yearbook photo on his desk. Possibly keep his favorite candid photo as a bookmark for his diary, not that Sebek would know anyone that keeps a journal. He can have your birthday written in his calendar with a heart drawn around it, and have your picture in his wristwatch. He can set alarms to know when your classes end and walk you home. He can worry when you're sick and listen to your obnoxious prying....he can receive all your affections, and have your loyalty. Listen to your silly ramblings and receive those random 'i just thought of you' presents that Sebek always has a dilemma over what their purpose serves

You can be Ace's headache, and Sebek's heart will be lighter for it. These attachments he's formed were a lapse in judgement and will never be allowed again.

...

Sebek asks his lord for permission to court you. The next morning Malleus wakes to find the devotee bowed outside his bedroom, forehead attached to the floor and hands laid flat on the ground in reverence. Sebek proceeds to begin a long rant about how he's succumbed to his inner demons, and that he has sinned for letting another in his heart - Malleus cuts him off, happy to see love blossoming and interested to watch it all play out. He tells Sebek to take good care of you, before leaving. Meanwhile Sebek is sobbing at his lord's blessing

Once he's gathered himself, Sebek runs to your dorm and pounds on the door with fervor despite the early hour

Grim shakes you out of sleep, grumbling something about an 'annoying bastard' at the door before flopping back in bed. He shoves two pillows over his ears and tells you to fix the problem. That's when you hear the thumping, it's relentless and somehow sours your mood beyond what you thought possible. Mornings were not meant to exist on the weekend. So with an irritated groan, you slip on a robe over your pajamas and answer the door. A fist pauses in the air, moments from striking you. Sebek freezes momentarily, his body going ridged before coughing into his fist. A light blush dusts his cheeks.

“G-good morning, human. I apologize if I've disturbed your sleep, but I have an important announcement that cannot wait any longer" Sebeck studders, focusing on the door pane instead of your disheveled morning appearance.

“Alright" you sigh, resigning yourself to his whims, "what is it?"

Sebeck bows at the waist. "I am in love with you. Please accept my affections."

And so the motions continued on. A most unconventional pairing - possibly the hottest topic of the school year, in the words of Cater Diamond - was formed. Sebek was cautious of Ace at first, their previous spats leaving a bitter taste in his mouth. When he found out the truth, he was both appalled and grateful. So much that he scorned all his friends for weeks on end for pulling a stunt like that - but also thanking them. He apologizes for calling Ace a delinquent, and his heart changes a bit in response to their 'unique' display of care. Their intentions were good, and in the end it worked out. So he can pardon the indiscretion.

Life goes on until your relationship forms an 'awkward situationship'. The first time is brief. As it is with most cases of young love, the binding force that ties you to them crumbles. On earth it is highschool. In Twisted Wonderland it is NRC. Sebek knows where he's going - to serve the Draconias . The grey area is what you plan to do...because as much as his affections have grown, Sebek isn't willing to give up his dreams for you.

He's astonished when you decide to follow him to Briar Valley. He doesn't even have to breech the topic - arrangements were already being made without his input. You wouldn't be staying at the palace against his Lord's wishes. Instead a small cottage was built at a safe distance from the main city. Close enough for you to visit the castle, and far enough for you to feel comfortable and not out of place.

Seeing you taking his wants into consideration alters Sebek's perception of your relationship. You truly were lovers, and not a passing 'hormonal induced fling'. You loved him, and it's here when he truly begins to consider a forever. It was like the time when he first called your name, no longer calling you by 'prefect' or 'human'. He had done it many times in private, yet doing so to your face altered his brain chemistry. He loved the way your name rolled off his tongue, and the way your attention became his at the call.

Which leads us to the third and final major block-aid. Years have passed, and Sebek's well grown as an established knight for the Draconia family. He works alongside Silver, and many other comrades in arms. Everything is exactly as he dreamed. Malleus has become a beloved, strong king. Sebek is respected, and you are thriving as well. He didn't have much faith in your ability to last alone - it's not that he doubts your abilities, but he did doubt his people. When you first moved to Briar Valley Sebek was well aware that there were many like his past self - fae with a hatred for humans. He worried you would struggle to fit in.

Yet you surprised him. The tensions did exist against your kind, but you managed to card a space for yourself in Briar Valley with ease. You didn't even work in the palace, instead choosing to work towards becoming a children's teacher and work towards helping future generations of fae feel comfortable around humans.

His family adored you - with his mother in particular fawning over how Sebek fell down the same pipeline she did. His father offers you both advice on being an interspecies couple - and Sebek actually found himself listening.

Huh. Character growth. Is this what it's like to mature?

All is perfect, yet not. Sebek is forced to confront this when news travels that a human was attacked on their way to the palace. The dread that coursed through his veins was unlike anything Sebek's felt in his entire life. Under Malleus' rule, humans were slowly becoming more prevalent in Briar Valley. They hadn't mentioned your name specifically, but he jumped the gun.

Against his better judgement, Sebek abandons his post and rushed to the city's clinic. The injured human wasn't you, thank the seven, but the dread lingered. So he ran to the school you taught at and practically barged into your classroom. Luckily it was empty as the day was near end. Sebek hadn't known that yet still behaved recklessly.

He rushed to your side, talking faster than your brain could keep up with while checking over your body. He flipped topics like a teen trying to pick a college major - scolding you for worrying him, blubbering gibberish about how you'd no longer be allowed to walk alone, and myriad of other things.

Sebek was so shook, that he completely forgot about his knightly station. Malleus didn't punish him for abandoning his post. Not like it mattered, considering Sebek was already doing ample damage on his own. The realization hit him like a stone punch to the gut - there was a threat to his liege, and instead of focusing on apprehending the criminal he chose to find you.

Malleus' power or his dismissal of the matter meant little in the overall picture. Sebek failed. He's ashamed beyond belief.

and yet, he can't help but wonder what ight have been. What if you were the one attacked and he chose to stay? He would have failed you in that scenario.

He's surprised to find that the prospect his failure hurts just as much - if not more. His lord is powerful, and there are many to serve him. Your last moments could have been spent in a cold medical bed, surrounded by strangers. Fading away and taking Sebek's dreams with you.

............

Ah. Since when had that word become plural? His dream was always to serve Lord Malleus. Now there are more - he wants a family, and he wants to go to that play you were organizing with the valley's children next weekend. He wants to become a greater knight to protect the city that houses all the people he cares about. Again, plural. Lilia, Silver, his siblings and parents, all the human and fae who are loyal subjects to his most revered. You, and your decedents to come.

It's frightening. How valuable one's life can become. His always belonged to the Draconia bloodline to do with at they pleased - now Sebek's in pieces. Is he truly worthy of being a knight if he cannot give his whole heart?

He doesn't blame you for this. In his youth Sebek might have tossed your relationship aside in a heartbeat - that, or he might've demanded Malleus dismiss him and send him to repent in exile or whatever. Sebek has a problem with embellishing with dramatics.

BUT... he's more mature now. Mature enough to realize that maybe he can have his cake and eat it too.

So, he asks Lilia for advice. At this time the general merely lazes around the castle like a bat on the wall - acting as an advisor and observer. Surely he'd know what to do.

"There is nothing wrong with sharing a heart amongst many. If anything, the toughest decisions make us stronger. The more you have to lose, the stronger you will become to protect"

Preach it grandpappy. Lilia wants to see his grandkids so stop the slow burn already.

It's deja vu because Sebek wants to propose as quick as possible. Just like when he confessed, the man nearly runs to your home on impulse. You can thank Lilia for your proposal not taking place at 3am with your door being broke in two (Sebek is much stronger than he was in his teens, and sometimes miscalculates his strength).

Instead, Sebek finds himself anxiously clutching a ring in his pocket the following week. It was the night of a school play you were hosting - one he was looking forward to since you were so proud in your work. Ergo, Sebek felt pride as well by default.

How unfortunate that he can't focus on the show. With his mind reeling so much, it's taking all he has to sit quietly in the audience. His eyes follow your movements as you direct the kids, and for a brief moment you smile at him from the stage.

Zap. Alright. Don't clutch metal when you're a living thunderbolt. Duly noted. If anything the jolt of pain brings him back to reality.

When the play ends, and all the children have gone home with their families, he finds you back stage sweeping confetti. His plan was to congratulate you, and take you to a nice restaurant where he could do this properly.

Except he can't wait. When you turn around from putting the broom away, he's already taken a knee and holding the ring out. Those diligent gold iris' not pulling away for one moment, as he holds the ring out between two fingers and his other hand placed over his heart as if taking an oath.

"Before you say anything - You have sacrificed time and time again for my happiness - my efforts are insignificant in comparison. I have taken your patience for granted like a spoiled juvenile. There was a time when I found this kindness of yours unnecessary. I thought it a distraction - a test of my strength to fulfill my destiny. I see now that I was foolish”

Sebek pauses, grinding his teeth together in regret and anguish.

“I had not known fear until you. I have more to lose now than ever before. Last week I abandoned my post - my purpose- In that moment, all I could think about was if you’d been attacked, then my life would be over. You make me lose all sense of logic and reason…so I demand that you take responsibility and marry me!”

{A gold band with an obsidian base. Gold and silver flakes are sealed atop the obsidian plate using resin. Very practical, yet charming nonetheless. Humans typically wear matching bands, yes? Sebek sees no purpose in getting separate designs since the point is to show proof of partnership. He needs a practical shape that will not interfere with combat, yet also wants it to be an aesthetic choice. Sebek could care less about looks, but if he’s going to give you a ring then it will be the best possible option to match to your worth}

Silver is beautiful like still ocean waters. He's breathtaking - literally and figuratively. With the beauty of a fairytale prince, personality of a wise knight, and deadliness of the deep sea. It's easy to be sucked in when Silver seemingly has no flaws. So easy that at one point there were rumors of him being a living doll, created by the fae to be a perfect solider.

These perceptions all rely on his outward appearance: the knight in shining armor. Albeit so, being so perfect almost makes him unnoticeable. Compared to his rowdy peers with quirks and notable personalities - Silver truly is a doll. Like the complacent child praised for being more mature than their siblings. He is as easily forgotten as he is admired.

Some would say that this is a flaw in itself - because no one is naturally perfect. No one is so complacent and calm at birth. It's simply a desirable flaw. One that hurts him, yet has ben praised by others.

Silver is strong. Silver is diligent. Silver is beautiful. Silver is breathtaking and yet not the showstopper - like gold. Gold brings warmth while silver is cold. Imperfections in gold give it character, and can be seen as art. Imperfections in silver are seen as unsightly scratches.

Silver knows this, yet doesn't want to be gold. He doesn't deserve to be gold.

Silver doesn't deserve anything. He has already taken so much simply by living. He has a world to be grateful for, and not enough time to repay his debts.

He is content being Silver - if he could then he'd be copper. Lesser. Yet he is Silver, a reminder of the blood he carries.

He will remain unremarkable yet dedicated. He will dedicate everything to his family and friends - do whatever he can to break free of his sleeping curse and help others. He will give until he cannot give anymore. Then he will give more, to repay all he has received.

....For as much as he is content with this life, Silver still envies gold.

You are beautiful like a new dawn. Ushering in each day with a vibrant display that commands attention. People instinctively admire you despite the risk of hurting their eyes. You heal the world naturally, and help others simply by existing. People take you for granted, because inevitably the moon will rise, and the cold will inevitably return.

You were bathed in golden light. This Silver noticed the moment he laid eyes on you. He couldn't tear his eyes away.

Silver envies gold.

........

You envy Silver. His calm, his family, his dedication despite being limited by his crippling drowsiness. Out of the students from Diasomnia, he was the one you lingered towards more often than not. The freshmen revered him for his skills, and he was a true gentle soul. You at first couldn't believe that he was Lilia's son - how did such a kind boy come from a rambunctious tease? Revelations of his past brought much to light, and now you couldn't think of him being anyone else.

Silver was loved like the first snowfall. He had a family that loved him dearly, no matter how short his time with them would be. He was raised to bring happiness to others, and protect their hearts using his demure temperament.

Silver was modest, and silver glistened when you'd expect him to the least. As the wind caressed his hair during an afternoon siesta, or sparks lit in his eyes while swinging his sword. How the horses nuzzle his side after equestrian practice, showing full trust and affection. Even in the sweat dripping from his brow, shining as he easily finishes a set of push ups.

Yet nothing struck your heart more than the melancholy he'd emit when no one was looking. How quickly he'd fade into the background, only popping in when necessary or if someone gave him note. In these moments Silver gleamed brilliantly, yet a shadow put out his shine.

You thought the melancholy inviting. It felt so natural, so real. Except you believed it balanced dangerously between despair and serene. The larger question being which side would he evidently fall towards.

.........

Silver admires gold.

He couldn't stop the pull. He just couldn't. Not with how you seemingly watch him when no one else does. Who wouldn't feel special? With the way you take note of things he normally wouldn't think of, and recklessly delve into helping others with no regard for yourself. Whether you desire the trouble is beyond him - the matter is that you see every issue through. There isn't a soul who doesn't know of the ramshackle prefect.

Perhaps this is his torment to endure. To get a taste for what he could have been, and willingly be tied to it.

Silver stares into a vanity mirror, his expression neutral despite the growing emotions inside. A slightly tattered sheet is tied around his neck like a bib, covering his front and part of his back. A shiver runs down his spine as you comb through his hair, deftly trimming the edges with a pair of kitchen scissors with the precision of a professional. A shiver runs down his spine every time your fingers linger against his scalp, either from tucking stray strands or combing through layers with your fingertips.

Your expression is stern, eyes intensely focused as you cut around his ear, afraid to nick him in the process. He finds the expression adorable yet bites his tongue. Silver couldn't think those thoughts. Not when you offered to do this out of the kindness of your heart.

Nonetheless, his heart thrums. If it were possible he'd think the organ about to pop out at any moment.

"Finished!" you smile in satisfaction and tussle Silver's soft locks for good measure. In one fell swoop, you undo the knot around his neck and pull the makeshift apron off of him. Silver nods, a slight smile teasing the edge of his lips. He stands from the chair and steps over any hair on the floor, reaching for the broom to clean before you could think to. "Thank you. I no longer need to schedule with a barber. This will save much time," In truth he had no intentions for a haircut. Either himself or his father would trim the ends once they started interfering with his sight, but he was too busy as of late. You were the one to notice how his bangs hindered his vision, and offered to help. Silver couldn't bring himself to deny your kindness. "You really like it? Hehe. Y'know, maybe I should start a shop on campus? I only started doing this since there aren't any affordable salons....maybe with it I can finally afford to fix the guest room!" you cheer and prattle on about all the different possibilities. Occasionally you'll ask for Silver's input, or even give an off hand compliment about how he was the perfect 'test subject'. Your company is intoxicating, he realizes. Talking with you is as easy as drinking water. Before Silver realizes, night has fallen and you've fallen asleep on the couch. Despite his better judgement, he finds himself wandering the Ramshackle door. He compulsively cleans up the mess you'd both left behind during his visit, doing the dishes from dinner and rearranging things here and there. As he does so, Silver notes all the little improvements around the dorm. It feels more like a home than a school building. Then again you do live alone. He wonders how often you host visitors, and if you unknowingly ensnared them just as you've done to him. He covers your shoulders with a blanket and steps outside under the moonlight.

It’s cold.

...............

You wake up the following day to find all the windows shut, your living room clean, and a warm blanket covering your shoulders. Your eyes peer around for silver, yet turn up empty.

Of course. Silver has a dorm to return to and people that would miss him if he returned late.

Shuffling around the silent dorm, the rickey old floorboards creek underneath your weight. In manufactured motions, you brew a cup of tea and pour it into the only well-used cup from the cabinet.

As your cup brews, you sit at the table with the blanket still clutched tight over your shoulders.

The tea goes cold, yet you are warm.

................

Silver loves gold.

but silver and gold don't mix. The question always is: silver or gold? When deciding a piece of jewelry to match your skin tone, people will ask 'silver or gold'? The metals are not meant to mix because they clash. It's an outfit catastrophe.

Yet, Silver cannot help but wonder. As he lays with his head in your lap and the sun and silence coaxing him to slumber - what if an outfit existed to compliment both silver and gold?

"Silver..are you sleeping again?" you tap his cheek with one hand, and his eyes open instinctively. Despite his drowsiness he will always look for you. Yet right now he's never regretted the magnetic pull more. With the sun casting a golden overcast, you peer down at him from above with tender eyes typically reserved for one's child. Your glow is breathtaking, and he cannot help the sinking feeling in his stomach that he is unworthy. With such gentle hands combing across his scalp and eyes that look upon him so tenderly - he is afraid to steal your warmth. And yet… "You are beautiful," Silver lets it slip, his hand reaching to brush against your jaw as if under a spell. He feels unnervingly calm. Not in his usual way, where he is constantly observing and playing a game of mental chess. This is a true calm, and he knows now that this is a point of no return.

Silver is beautiful like a still ocean. You are beautiful like the rising sun. When combined, a perfect image is formed just waiting for an artist to stumble upon it.

Against his wishes, the world has granted the child of dawn another gift. The gift of true love. 'True love's kiss will break the curse' and while it is childish to believe so in this case, Silver does so wholeheartedly.

When with you, the days pass like minutes. He wants nothing more than to forgo need for sleep, if only to work harder towards becoming a man worthy.

Silver envies gold for it's effortless demand for love, yet he no longer wants to be gold. He no longer wishes he were born copper.

Gold loves silver, so Silver he will be.

And with time, both Silver and Gold will be ground to dust regardless.

He thinks of this on a winter evening while holding a ring up into the moonlight. It's cold outside, yet he doesn't mind. The chill atop his nose does nothing but tinge it a lovely rosy color.

He looks through the windowpane into a home masquerading as a school building. His reflection is familiar yet changing rapidly in comparison to his family. The years have aged him, yet not by much. Silver is stronger, his soft jaw a bit sharper. His bangs have grown long again, it would soon be time for a cut. Perhaps he'd enlist a 'barber' after relocating back to the castle in briar valley.

Inside you sit at the couch, sipping from a well-used mug with Grim on your lap and watching cartoons. Silver's bag rests on the armchair, unzipped with nightly necessities spilling out the side. A slightly newer baby blue mug sits on the coffee table, with steam evaporating into the air as it waits to be used.

Silver smiles, walking towards the door and walking inside. Heat warms his cheeks and he is calm.

"I know I am unworthy of you, the thought plagues me to this very moment. Yet I cannot help but love you - like wishing on a star yet knowing deep in the depths of your heart that miracles are made not granted. I've received many, so I would know. My father gifted me life through love - and with you I understand how it is possible. I cannot imagine life without you. I promise this, I will cherish you and protect you for as long as you allow it. Would you marry me?"

Months later a ceremony is held in a secluded forest, in the yard of a cottage where a child first learned love. As an adult, he joins his most precious in matrimony, offering his sword to be sworn faithful.

You are beautiful like the first breech of daylight - and for once, Silver is happy to be a man of dawn.

Silver and gold.

Silver and gold.

Everyone wishes for silver and gold.

How do you measure it's worth?

Just by the pleasure it gives here on earth.

{A ring forged from a silver band, gold leaf embellishments, and a moss agate core. Enough said.}

[autistichalsin]

Halsin's autism coding really jumps out in his camp confession scene

Both the romantic and platonic one. Starting with the romantic one:

He thinks asking about his past lovers is a sign of interest (I notice a lot of autistic folks like us tend to never get it "right"- when we guess that someone might be interested because of cues we were told were romantic, we get it wrong, whereas when someone is showing certain cues, we think it's just friendly!)

The way he feels the need to explain why he thinks you're interested in him before you accept or reject. This one isn't explicitly explained, of course, but it is very easy to read it as an autistic person afraid of being harshly rejected/told they're insane to think there was a connection, so he puts out an explanation first in the hopes of softening the blow if he turned out to be wrong.

Halsin completely, and adorably, misinterprets the player if they tell him "maybe your heart stirs easier than you think"; he doesn't understand that the player is partially slut-shaming him (which is rude af on the player's end, but he misses this because he's honestly un-slutshamable, so he would never be offended here) and partially asking for clarification- how can you have had many lovers yet your heart doesn't stir easily? Not understanding this, Halsin goes on to tell stories of his past exploits, which are hot and very welcome, but also very much not what the player as getting at.

If the player is an absolute asshole and mocks him by comparing him to a deep rothe, he is crushed, but stays calm, simply telling them that they could have just said no- he doesn't call the player a jerk like they deserved. Just feels very true to the 'tism experience.

This line alone could stand as proof, I think: "Nature gifted us our desires, and the means to act on them. But we muddied its beautiful simplicity with rules, social strictures... clothes." He hates social structures for their complexity, and prefers something simpler. The dislike of social structures, of their nebulous nature, is a core autistic experience.

If the player says they only helped because he's a useful ally, he once again misreads; he misses that the statement was a rejection, and responds earnestly that he sees them as much more than an ally.

For the new platonic path:

If the player tells him they just want him to carry heavy things for them, he responds differently based on his approval levels to them (I.E. based on how close they are and how kind he feels the player is); at low approval, he is deeply hurt by this, and sadly muses that "perhaps not all friendships are destined to be balanced and reciprocal." Yet... he still considers it a friendship, even though that is in practice no friendship at all. A lot of autistic folks have this experience of being friends with people who don't share the same level of affection, or even outright mistreat, us.

In fact, the same thing happens in another variation: if the player snarks about Halsin inviting himself along (a way of saying "get lost"), he laughs and warmly says that he guesses he did invite himself along, and that he will be "more tactful when trying to make friends in future." Declaring oneself friends with others is such a classic autistic experience, but even MORE so is declaring yourself friends with someone who only tolerates, or even actively dislikes, you. It's quite sad- but also very endearing, because I feel so SEEN in that moment.

[akookminsupporter]

ARE YOU SURE?!: THIRD EPISODE

MY IMPRESSIONS

Preface: This is not an analysis post, and honestly, I don’t want to overanalyse their interactions or everything they said and did—many others are already doing that. My intention with this post is simply to share my thoughts on the episodes, my impressions, and perhaps my conclusions.

I’m writing this as I watch the episodes for the second time.

Well, this time the trailer or preview of the episode didn’t lie. Tae wasn’t originally scheduled, so to speak, to be on the show. He saw the schedule and invited himself. That’s very him; he does what he wants. This is also confirmed by the activities they chose.

From the first minute, you can see the dynamic between Jungkook and Tae, and I find it so obvious that I don’t understand why many people misinterpret it. They have a slightly passive-aggressive dynamic, but in a fun way. Jungkook is the cheeky teenager who always has a comeback for everything.

They really love Jeju Island. And Jungkook had to prove that his Jiminpedia is up to date.

Jimin and Jungkook bickering cutely will always give me life.

Jimin looked tired at the beginning of the trip. I wonder if it’s mainly because he tends to get carsick?

This episode perfectly showcased the dynamics between each pair, and I feel it confirmed what I said in an Ask: each pair operates on different wavelengths, and when they’re together, it becomes even more apparent. I feel like they try to make it work, and generally, it does, but it’s still obvious that their dynamics are different.

Tae and Jungkook are like two puppy Labradors, excited about absolutely everything. The way they ordered all kinds of food and then ate it so excitedly and happily was endearing to watch. Jimin looking a bit nostalgic and tired, it was quite… an interesting contrast, and a little bit funny too.

The way Jungkook’s face lit up when Jimin walked into the restaurant is just too beautiful and reminded me of that time when they were visiting a TinyTans store, and his face transformed when he heard Jimin’s voice. The same thing happened here.

Tae saying he shouldn’t have come, and Jimin and Jungkook immediately telling him to leave then, that it was their trip, is such a mood. They said it in a funny way, but at the same time, it’s a bit of that passive-aggressive dynamic the three of them share. Though I do wonder what Tae meant when he said “they do that even when there are no cameras”. What was he referring to? The slight awkwardness that’s always there between them? Or what?

Jimin and Jungkook telling Tae what happened on their trip to the USA suggests they don’t tell each other everything.

Why is Jungkook always picking up Jimin’s shoes, and why is Jimin practically allergic to his own shoes? Hahaha.

Jimin chasing after Tae to feed him is so on-brand with their dynamic.

Tae not knowing how to order at a drive-thru is that reminder we sometimes need as fans that they’ve never led normal lives. Though, on the other hand, Jimin seemed like an expert or at least someone with experience ajajajaajaja.

Jimin saying he wasn’t okay with Jungkook not finishing his coffee, despite Jungkook saying it was fine if he didn’t, says a lot about the kind of person Jimin is and how much he cares about Jungkook too.

Jimin and Jungkook immediately understanding that the mattress on the floor was for Tae and that the beds were obviously for them was a bit funny. I don’t know if they did it intentionally, but they basically said, “You weren’t originally part of the plan.”

Once again, Jungkook always worrying about the staff is heartwarming to see. They’re amazing people.

Vminkook, in general, are cute to watch together. Fun. It’s easy to see they’re the youngest in the group, haha. They’re too adorable. But it’s also easy to see in moments that Jimin is definitely the eldest, haha.

Jimin sleeping through all the chaos caused by Jungkook and Tae is definitely a MOOD. This reminds me of my previous posts when I said Jimin is one of those people who loves to travel and plan trips, but once he arrives, he just wants to rest and do nothing.

That said, Jimin just needed a nap to recharge. Ajajajajajaj

Well, we got to the part where Jungkook and Tae were lying down together. With all due respect, there was nothing romantic about it, and Jungkook looked a bit uncomfortable or lost. Another thing about their dynamic is that Tae often treats Jungkook like a child, or maybe “baby” is the right word in their case. Jungkook usually goes with the flow, but only for a moment. And that moment is a clear example of that. Their dynamic is definitely interesting.

Jungkook and Tae teasing Jimin is a recurring thing when the three of them are together. The funny part is that Jimin is usually the one who starts, but then he can’t handle them.

When they went to the game center, or whatever it’s called, is when we saw the true regression of Jungkook and Tae to their childhood, haha. Jungkook, in particular, was the happiest. This moment also reconfirmed that the trip was designed for Jimin and Jungkook only. Another thing that became clear is that everything they did was chosen by them, as Jimin said it was his idea to pick that place.

When Jimin jumped and got hurt, the way Jungkook’s face fell immediately reminded me of the online concert the guys did. When Jimin started crying, Jungkook didn’t notice right away, and he was smiling, but when he saw Jimin, his face immediately changed. Something similar happened here.

Hearing Jungkook say “Jiminssi” in the way he always does will always give me years of life.

Jimin and Tae are mostly toddlers together. And they’re very cute to watch.

MY CONCLUSION ON THE THIRD EPISODE

This episode was what I thought it would be. As I’ve said many times, watching their dynamic is interesting.

Something else I confirmed is that the dynamic between Jimin and Jungkook changes a bit when there’s another member present. It’s not that they change in those moments, but I feel they adjust their dynamic to include the other person. I feel they also sacrifice their closeness in a way so as not to exclude the other person. More than once, I’ve wondered if they do this because they’re aware of how they are ajajaajajaj.

The above, I think, is the reason why this episode feels so different from the previous one. This episode is three friends on a vacation that was originally meant for two.

Something I did feel, and this might be controversial, is that this episode felt like a filler episode. I feel like it was more of the same and wasn’t really necessary. I don’t know. It’s also true that this episode felt more like what we’re used to seeing in these types of BTS shows, so in a way, it felt nostalgic.

With that, I can understand why many are saying they miss the vibe of the first two episodes and honestly, I kind of agree with that. I want more of the first two episodes, but at the same time, I like the fact that the three of them had that time together before enlisting and honestly, that difference helps to clearly see the difference between Jimin and Jungkook when they’re alone compared to when they’re with others, in this case, with another member.

Overall, I enjoyed the episode. It was really fun and cute. And I want to see more of how their dynamic and interactions developed as a trio.

If you’ve made it this far, I’m sorry and thank you—I just couldn’t stop writing ajajajajaja.

[infiniteetcetera]

My next weekly controversial ACOTAR post: A defense of Azriel, because if I see one more post saying he has no personality or is an incel (but also an f-boy apparently) then it’s game over

Azriel is such an interesting and complex character I think it’s an incredible shame so many readers misinterpret him just because his character is shown is small bursts rather than loud blasts. SO i’m not going to try and defend him because this man has done nothing wrong, instead I’ll provide y’all with a list of moments that prove both that Azriel DOES have a personality and that’s it’s a loveable one:

•He tells Feyre that Cassian is annoying right up front (a small thing but I appreciate it)

• He spent the night at Rita’s with Feyre, playing silly games betting on Rhys’ dating life (funny for so many reasons) and making her feel comfortable in an overwhelming situation

•Even though he’s quiet and private, he confides to Feyre he doesn’t know where he belongs after 500 years and feels he doesn’t fit in to reassure her that the feelings she’s having are normal

•He was reassuring and polite to Elain and Nesta when they first meet

•Acknowledged that it was a risk and a sacrifice for Nesta and Elain to lend them their house and was thankful rather than antagonistic or rude (*cough cough Cassian*) and met them both with a protective regard to Feyre but an open mind about their circumstances

•Is so upset by the mysogny and abuse in Illyria he straight up refuses to go there because he will not play nice and polite with these jerks like Rhys and Cas do

•In Feyre’s own words, she trusts him well enough that if Rhys was ever doing something to harm her/locking her up like Tamlin did she believes he would not only save her but deal with Rhys himself if it came to it

•Follow up on above, he spies on Amren against Rhys’ orders. When Feyre asks about it Amren says Azriel is the most disobedient of the IC (some of them could never) because he’s willing to do what is right over what Rhys thinks is right (hot)

•Gave Feyre such a stunning smile after she accepts the mating bond that Rhys is filled with jealousy and ready to attack (that is to say, this man is very pretty and deserves credit for it)

•Amren putting her head on his shoulder after battle because she’s tired and everyone (including him) is shocked but he’s polite about it and also it just radiates male worth trusting vibes

•Was literally bleeding out screaming crying throwing up poisoned and still sassed the king of Hybern for Mor and Feyre

•When Cassian is trying to make Lucien uncomfortable Azriel KICKS HIM (all the Azriel is so mean/hates Lucien people come down to reality please)

•When Cassian implies something rude about Nesta and Mor wants to join in Azriel shoots her a look to stop (yes the Az that is supposedly obsessed with Mor and her opinion of him) and Feyre describes said look as as if they had talked about it many times before so YES EVEN PRE-ACOWAR THIS MAN WAS SUPPORTING NESTA

•Feyre and Mor both agree he’s the only one with manners

•He laughed at Nesta’s sassy comment to Mor because man respects good comedy

•When Cassian makes a sexist joke and implies Az is thinking the same thing not only does Azriel not engage with his tomfoolery but Mor cuts in to defend him as the only batboy who never says such things

•Just the ENTIRE sequence of him training Feyre to fly. He’s so sweet and witty and charming

•So gentle and reassuring to Elain, offering to show her the garden and carrying her all the way up to the house

•Him taking care of Feyres injuries from the flying lessons. Again just always being so gentle and sweet. He trusts her enough not to go easy on her but isn’t cruel and overworking either

•The entire Nephelle story and just the fact Rhys gave the story to Azriel as a “gift” this boy appreciates sweet stories about underdog lesbians with wings and I love it

•Just him paying such close careful attention to Elain and recognizing she is a seer, him talking her through her visions and helping reassure her she’s not crazy (he knows what that feels like)

•Even though he hates Illyrians, he helps Cassian break the news to the families of those who lost warriors in the war

•Just “I don’t see you spouting poetry brother” “I don’t need to resort to it😩🔥”

•BE CAREFUL HOW YOU SPEAK ABOUT MY HIGH LADY

•Eris uttered the word “slut” about a woman and this man ATTACKED. Like I am an Eris stan and I know some people don’t like this scene but it’s the true feminist energy I need

•Ignoring Rhys’ order to stand down but stopping the second Feyre says something bc this man respects women’s authority (t’s literally an intentional way of demonstrating Feyres power right after she was belittled by Tamlin. people act like he was rabid in this scene but it seems so clear to me he was intentionally doing this to support his high lady)

•Was the first to realize something was wrong with Elain (also has a sweet exchange of looks with Nesta over it, like they are homegirl’s designated protectors)

•Just EVERYTHING about him volunteering to get Elain back. Whether you ship Elriel or not this was such a sweet moment. He doesn’t hesitate at all even when Nesta says it’s a death wish and everyone’s sentiment starts to change.

•Everything about him saving Elain and the human girl. Just 10/10 all around, hot, stunning, sweet, incredible, precious angel of death boy

•Az is so badly wounded after the rescue mission that Rhys and the others who see him are shocked but he refused to set Elain down (even though she’s not hurt) until Rhys takes her and the first thing he asks is for Helion to come unchain her (not anything for himself). Again just SOOO sweet and caring whether you ship Elriel or not

•Another Elriel moment but well they happen, Az giving her truth teller is just🤧 he’s never lent out this blade to his brothers or anyone else, we know it has some special brand of magic and he likely does too and he offers it to Elain to give her a sense of safety (again even if you don’t ship them it’s just so considerate)

•”Chain me to a tree Rhys, I’ll rip it out of the ground and fly with it on my damned back” LIKE TELL ME THAT ISNT HOT

•A super small moment but after the war when the boys are watching the sisters/Mor laughing and Rhys starts crying Az tells him “it’s real” and I just think the intuitive understanding and care behind that is so sweet (especially when Az is so misunderstood by his brothers)

•This sounds more like a hate comment to Rhys/Cassian than pro Az but when Rhys admits he and Cassian used to beat Azriel for hours to get him to speak to them and he never would, I think that’s such crazy determination and resolve and also he’s wayyyyy nicer than me for still putting up with them after that

•HIM REFUSING TO SPY ON LUCIEN. I just love that degree of respect it’s made even better by the fact Rhys asks about Lucien a second time bc he literally assumes Az was joking and Azriel’s just like “nope not doing it” (again people who say he hates Lucien, please)

•Him finding drunk Cassian and Feyre and trying to fix their terrible decorations the just chugging some wine himself😭 he’s so funny AND sweet

•”Sit, I’ll take care of it.” I NEED THIS ENERGY FROM EVERY MAN EVER PLEASE

•Also him telling everyone to wait for Elain because she’s literally the one who cooked and them eating before her would be rude and I just IWJDKWKDN again so hot and polite and it’s not even a romance/flirting thing bc when Elain comes back and she/Cas give him the opportunity to take credit he doesn’t at all?? He just did it because it’s right and proper

•Him insulting Amren to defend Elain (and then blushing when everyone laughs at his joke) he’s precious (and funny af)

•Him dying at Elains gift JMEKXNEKD the IC stresses him fr and he’s waiting for someone to free him

•Him being nice about Mor’s awful gifts even though she’s known him for 500 years and still gets him awful gifts and also exchanges lingerie with Cassian to his (and Nesta’s) face even though she thinks Az is in love with her

•Half compliment to Az half complaint about Cassian, but when there’s mention of all the universe research Rhys does in ACOSF Cassians like “Rhys told him and he instantly forgot” but As is super interested and listens intently and wants to learn more and I just love a boy with hobbies and interests😩

•Small thing but when he first sees Nes in the house of wind in ACOSF he smiles and is so polite and Nesta tells us for like a whole paragraph how beautiful he is and I trust that woman above all

•Also in reference to the above, Nesta chats with Az for like 10 seconds and instantly wants to train with him over Cas because she knows he’d be better to her

•Azriel blushing when Nesta calls him pretty✨ (such a sweet lover boy I swear)

•He laughs at Nesta’s insults to Cassian but holds back from laughing at Cassians✨

•The only one who literally JUST ASKS why Nesta won’t train and also sparks the idea in Cassians obtuse head that it might be because she doesn’t want to train in Illyria (VALID)

•I know people have mixed takes about how the scene is written but him asking Nesta if she was pushed down the stairs feels genuine to me, like he asks the question very pointedly serious and focuses just on Nesta, his vague amusement after is only in regard to Cassians dumb reaction but the fact he asked her and the way in which he does it (ignoring Cassians input and still waiting for Nesta’s answer) shows genuine consideration to her (still a stranger to him for all intents and purposes) over his brother’s feelings

•Him paying such careful attention to Nesta and being the only one who never starts fights with her to such a strong degree that even Nesta feels too seen by him

•Such a basic thing (but it’s not when you look at the quality of other ACOTAR men unfortunately) but when Cassian asks him if he wants kids he says it’s not his decision (like this is why I hate the anti-elriel “elain can’t bare his children” argument, I assure you Az does not gaf)

•”Azriel had never said a bad word about Nesta” and i’m not supposed to stan???

•Also the fact he doesn’t like hand to hand combat bc he doesn’t like getting covered in people’s sweat JEKKDKW I know it’s just a gag Cas jokes about but there’s something so funny and refined about that

•Him being so competitive is hot honestly😩 especially how Cassian describes it as not being in an arrogant or scary way but in a very strategic sort of manner, how he’s often the only one who can compete with Rhys (who was trained for this stuff since birth) like YES

•Az getting flustered and awkwardly walking away when he sees how Nesta is staring at him and Cas KEKKDKE i so highly appreciate his balance between confident and shy boy

•Him and Nesta smiling about Cassians stupidity, being “allies against his insanity,” again, Az just being a friend to her is so sweet (and important given it’s like the one thing Nesta needed in this book)

•Not only does he vote with Cas against keeping things from Nes but when Amren starts saying lewd things about her it’s Azriel (not Cassian bc apparently he could never) who tells her to STFU about Nesta

•Amren tells the boys NOT to touch the sword and Az is legit the only one who tries to listen (the ONLY bat boy with brain cells half the time)

•Just the fact that once he starts training the Priestesses with Cas Nesta notes a bunch of them seem to have crushes on him. Like these girls who have been so traumatized by men they can barely stand to be in public feel that comfortable with him so quickly, he just radiates safe energy

•Also a small moment but him awkwardly smiling the first time he sees Gwyn at training and just trying to act casual to not make her feel weird is so sweet.

•Him dancing with Nesta “as easily as breathing” (again, their friendship means everything to me)

•When Nesta asks him why he came to solstice if seeing Elain/Lucien hurts him and he says “Because Rhys wants me here and it’d hurt him if I didn’t come” like HEJEKNDO he’s so selfless for the people he cares about FR (especially given how Rhys talks to him that same night)

•EVERYTHING about his gift to Nesta. The fact he didn’t have to give her one in the first place (it was no one’s expectation, including hers. on the surface he didn’t even get Elain a gift so it wasn’t just a polite thing). The way the gift is literally SO SWEET AND GENUINELY THOUGHTFUL like he took care not just to get her something but to get her something that would bring her joy and be useful (and is definitely based on his observations about her avoiding the fireplace)

•ALSO when she hugs him the entire room goes silent because they’re just that shocked but he just laughs and hugs her gently and then is blushing after like ANDKEKD

•The entire relationship he forms with Gwyn and how he notes shes competitive and uses that to help inspire her in training and even when he’s teasing her he’s so potently rooting for her too

•Him being nervous about holding baby Nyx with his scarred hands like this precious angel IEKKDKW

Most Offending Thing, His Bonus Chapter (the good and the bad)

•Him scheming about a snowball fight for a whole year is hilarious

•Also him including in his plotting that Cassian would be up all night with Nesta (little did he know his boy only lasts like one round, that and Cassian being so horrified at the thought of Az finding out about him being quick off the mark with Nesta, I just know Az is the stamina king)

•Even his shadows just want him to sleep but your boy is too depressed

•I’m sorry but everything about his and Elains almost kiss is HOT people who think it was overly sexualized or something have missed all the first thoughts we get from like every SJM boy about their LI (ROWAN IN QOS FR) and also the fact that this tension has obviously been brewing for a while??? he’s been avoiding her because it’s that palpable and ELAIN KNOWS IT. it’s a mutual thing it doesnt mean there isn’t romance beneath it or that he’s a creep for wanting her after a year of putting off his feelings

Brief interlude, his offending lines:

•”My two brothers are with two of those sisters but the third was given to another” - the language here might make you uncomfortable but that’s because MATING BONDS ARE UNCOMFORTABLE. we’re told by Rhys himself that they’re often used to “give” a female to a male. the distinction he makes here that Feyre/Nes are “with” Rhys/Cas but Elain was “given” to Lucien is because Elucien is the only mating bond example we’ve followed in this series where the foundation is not love and choice. Azriel does not feel entitled/think he deserves Elain. In this same chapter he feels unworthy to even touch her, stands outside in the freezing cold until he’s “again nothing at all.” Mor tells us all the way back in ACOMAF that he feels completely undeserving of love. Azriel does not think he deserves Elain just because Rhys said so (Az LITERALLY glares at him for saying it). Azriel brought up a valid point (that other characters have too) that the Archeron sisters (who have comparable power) would makes sense all mated to the bat boys (again, comparable power) since we know that’s a crux of mating bonds. Not to mention, Azriel and Elain genuinely just like each other and always have, more so than any of the mated couples even. From a logical standpoint, they would make sense as mates. Even this ships haters say they would be “too predictable/obvious” like SO YOU AGREE THEY MAKE EASY LOGICAL SENSE that’s what Az is implying.

•”Lucien will never be good enough for her” I’ve seen a lot of people use this line to say Az hates/drags Lucien but that’s not how I interpret it at all. First off, all of Az’s other actions (i’ve listed some above) show he’s actually very considerate of/trusting in regards to Lucien. This line to me reads less as “lucien is a bad/undeserving person” and more “Lucien is not what Elain wants” (right after he says she has no interest in him). From Azriel’s POV (and ours my fellow readers) Lucien has done nothing to win over Elain. Yes he’s been polite and I applaud him for that over others actions with their mates (cough cough Cassian) but he’s also never sought her out for a real conversation about the bond, never had any sort of “clicking” moment with her, and still after years just makes her uncomfortable (as far as we and Az know). I think it makes perfect sense to infer from this Lucien is not “good enough” in regards to what Elain is seeking (I think the easiest way I can put this is the idea of “somebody can be perfect but still not perfect for you”). Is Azriel’s opinion a little biased? Yes FS, but also this girl was about to let him do filthy things to her down the hall from Lucien, I say it’s pretty safe for him to infer that she doesn’t want Lucien (and therefor never will).

•”He hadn’t gotten that far with his planning, certainly not beyond the fantasies he pleasured himself to” - I won’t repeat what I said above regarding the sexual undertones in the chapter, but also the reason why Az hadn’t thought beyond this is in the chapter and it’s not because he’s some fuck boy. AZRIEL KNOWS HE CANT HAVE A FUTURE WITH ELAIN AND DOESNT THINK HE DESERVES IT. It’s written all over their interactions together. He wanted to kiss her to have a piece of her to hold onto, not because he thinks he can have a future with her because he knows as things stand he can’t. He doesn’t want to plan to push her/seduce her (like rhys implies) or anything because he doesn’t feel worthy of her and knows circumstances won’t allow them to be together safely. What’s driving him crazy and keeping him up at night with fantasies is that they do both want each other, but imagining a life where they could have more than that and be happy together is impossible for Az because he’s someone who has never prioritized his happiness and does not expect it.

•”I’ll defeat him with little effort.” - Again reading comprehension I beg, this is not a diss against Lucien. If Lucien was the type of guy to invoke a blood duel because Elain chose Azriel (Lucien wouldn’t, Azriel doesn’t even think he would it’s Rhys who suggests it) then YEAH AZ CAN KICK HIS ASS WITH LITTLE EFFORT BC THAT WOULD BE A CRAPPY THING TO DO.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming

•I LOVE everything about his scene with Gwyn on the roof. His vague awkwardness, his teasing of her and trying to be polite, him actually trying to help her train (after we learn Cas has been useless, go figure), and just being so sweet and kind to her in general even though he’s probably still incredibly sad/upset🤧

•This precious boy gets a small urge to cross his arms and is thrown into a PTSD flashback of his father with his mom??? He constantly consciously makes effort not to appear scary/threatening to women because he’s that scarred from his fathers behavior😭

•Listen, I won’t try to entirely defend the necklace thing because I do think it’s weird no matter who you ship Azriel with BUT i will say my best take on it is that it’s a version of self harm/sabotage. Like the only thing that makes sense to me here is he’s subconsciously creating barriers in his relationships with both Elain/Gwyn by doing this which is honestly way less f-boy (a weird take i’ve seen from people, especially given at this point he has no plans to pursue either Elain or Gwyn) and just way more very sad.

FINALLY, sprinkles from HOFAS:

•He’s so FINE in this book

•His silly little things like kicking rocks while trailing Nesta and Bryce to make a point are SO funny

•Him and Nesta working so well together, may not be a point in his favor but it makes me happy

•Azriel loving and defending his mom✨

•Azriel barely snapping at Nesta and then immediately apologizing and saying he loves her. THAT is more emotional intelligence than any other male in ACOTAR has shown

•Him liking club music but also being embarrassed about it? Adorable

•Everything about his interactions with Bryce in this book strike me so hard because you can tell he’s trying to keep his guard up but still has a lot of sympathy for her. I think that gets to the core of who Az is: smart and distant and guarded but also genuinely kind above all

•Also so many small funny little jokes and lines

I COULD PROBABLY SAY MORE AND GO ON FOREVER BUT HOPEFULLY PEOPLE GET THE POINT :)

[inoreuct]

horse girl zoro/prince sanji au that @redgitanako and i talked about way back when because it suddenly crossed my mind OKAY HERE WE GO

zoro’s a travelling bounty hunter with three horses. yes, three. don’t tell kitetsu and enma but wado’s his favourite

wado was kuina’s horse; when kuina died she was so sad because she didn’t get why kuina was gone and for a while zoro had to emotionally support a horse AND himself, but horses are smart creatures. wado understood by herself after a while. they don’t really talk about it.

on that note, zoro talks to his horses. people look at him like he’s a few crayons short of the whole pack but they don’t say anything because he looks scary as hell; built like a brick wall, one eye gone, gnarly scar across his chest and all

(they’ll never know that he’s having an argument with enma about buying supplies where one party is contributing in possibly-misinterpreted horse looks. the crayons aren’t missing— but it’s admittedly a little hard to prove they’re there, zoro, we can’t keep defending you like this)

sanji's the third prince of the kingdom that hires him; sora’s the queen, and his siblings are all decent other than regular sibling assholery. judge is on the run and they’ve made the collective decision that they want his head on a stick.

zoro expects sanji to be a stuck-up priss because he LOOKS like a stuck-up priss— look at his perfect hair. his clothes. his heeled boots and his stupid curly eyebrows

but NO. well, yes, sanji IS a little bit of a stuck-up priss but also, he’s good with horses?? wado takes to him like a DREAM and zoro's flabbergasted because anybody who has ever tried to coddle her other than zoro or kuina has gotten kicked in the head, but sanji's petting at her neck and cooing at her in baby-talk and she's licking sugar cubes and apple slices out of his palm. zoro feels so betrayed.

like of COURSE his horse had to take a liking to the boy he hates OF ALL PEOPLE.

(zoro. at this moment the horse is smarter than you. listen to her.)

reiju’s the princess here, but sanji’s the one who got all the magic-esque affinities. animals LOVE him. he would be a literal disney princess if not for the fact that he doesn’t love them back

like SQUIRREL. WHY ARE YOU SHITTING ALL OVER MY YARD. GO AWAY. WHY IS A DOG TRYING TO LICK MY HAIR. WHYYY IS THIS BIRD BRINGING ME STICKS ALL THE TIME. he’s trying to fall asleep. he hears a TSKTSKTSKTSKTSKTSKTSK. he sits up and gets right out of bed and starts yelling at the lizard on the ceiling.

he does have a pretty mare called maple, though! (and zoro can’t help but love her too; it’s a sign that the mosshead doesn’t clock until much, much later)

and then zoro comes into his life with his three horses and sanji yanks him in by the collar like "listen up, swordsman. i do not CARE how sweet your horses are. i do not CARE how— how— WHATEVER you are. if you stink up my stable i will make you sleep in it, are we clear?" and zoro just nods because he’s having a bit of a gay crisis

sanji is 1. pretty 2. entirely able to hold his own and 3. Wado Approved™ and zoro does NOT know how to deal. at all. he’s holding onto wado’s reins for dear life. he wonders if the same ultimatum would apply if he swapped out the word stable for bed and immediately wants to dunk himself into the horse trough.

meanwhile sanji isn’t spared at all. sora sits on her throne, one eyebrow raised as her son goes on and on about how "mother i hate the swordsman you hired. he's green. and ugly. like a troll. like an OGRE. his hands are too big. his boots are too shiny. his earrings are cute but only because i want them. his EVERYTHING smells like horse. he might as well be a horse with how strong he is, did you know how many hay bales he carried at once??" and she’s just like,,, "honey are you sure this is hate"

she certainly wouldn’t mind them being together. zoro is rough around the edges and does smell a bit like horse, admittedly, but he was clearly raised right— he’s respectful in his own gruff way and he does things with immense care. sora’s noticed. she knows her son well enough to know that he’s noticed, too.

one day sanji bumps into zoro on his way out of the baths and wow. okay. so he doesn’t smell like horse ALL the time and oh his hair is damp and there's a towel around his waist and he is very, very shirtless and sanji turns around in a panic and walks face-first into a pillar.

he watches zoro care for his horses, carefully brushing through their manes and coats as he speaks to them softly, and alright. maybe this guy isn’t all bad. animals, sanji has noticed, are brilliant judges of character; horses especially can be testy and temperamental, and they don’t hesitate to kick anybody they don’t like.

zoro’s horses love him, and it’s obvious. maple looks forward to the snacks he slips her when he thinks that nobody’s looking. that says a lot more about his character than anything else.

after a few days zoro has a solid plan down and sets out to find judge, and suddenly the stables are empty. sanji finds himself going out with maple more and more, exploring the woods around their forest to pass the time because he needs something to keep his mind occupied and there’s only so much he can cook. judge might be a piece of shit, but he’s also an evil genius, and sanji refuses to admit he’s worried even though he is.

and then zoro comes back with judge’s war helmet wrapped in a cloth, gore dripping off the bottom edge as he sets it at sora’s feet.

he’s a little banged up, tired as hell with a couple of scratches here and there— nothing serious, but sanji still drags him to the infirmary and cleans him up perhaps a little more emotionally than either of them had expected

he passes out for a good few days afterwards but sora invites him to stay for a little longer, a time frame that nobody specifies. zoro just kind of… doesn’t leave. it’s strange for him; he’s wandered, always. he gets antsy staying in one place for too long, but this blond prince that is strangely kind and gives back as good as he gets is really something else.

the days pass. they race and bicker and soon enough, all three of zoro’s horses have brass name plaques tacked above what are now their stalls. he had a room in the palace and a place at the dinner table. sanji’s hair has grown long, now, and neither of them talk about the way that zoro’s stay has become something that feels more permanent—

until zoro finally finds the balls to give sanji one of his earrings as a courting gift. it’s the first one of many, but at that moment sanji just looks at it wide-eyed and zoro starts to shrink back all like "if you. don't want it that's alright. i'll get you something new, something else—" because look, he knows he’s not much. he has money, but not enough to give sanji something really nice. not enough to get something that’s more impressive than all the jewels and gold that the prince could have at a whim. he’s a bounty hunter that came from dirt and this earring is the most precious thing he has to offer, but he understands if—

sanji kisses him. yells something borderline incoherent along the lines of about fucking time as he shakes zoro by the shoulders, but he’s smiling very brightly and he’s very beautiful and zoro has a feeling they're going to be just fine.

(sora and the siblings breathe a collective sigh of relief, because the pining looks and dejected sighing were really getting a little ridiculous.)

(they speak too soon. after they get together it somehow gets WORSE.)

this was a ride… (get it. get it.) okay i’ll stop HOPE YOU ENJOYED HEH i know a lot of places are having a flu season/covid wave going around rn so make sure to hydrate and eat well!! muaks 😽

[aniseya]

i saw some things on the hellsite of twitter that i’ll just rant about here because god knows i don’t have the strength to deal with swtwt.

i feel like there’s kinda a misconception around qimir kidnapping osha being something that stans gloss over. like yeah, it is kidnapping, and more problematically in his head it’s justified, but people forget that’s how so many ships/especially enemy ships happen. how i take it is that qimir took osha not only because he was interested in her power but because he also knew mae was gone/the jedi were too.

in his head, he sees that they left osha for dead or were gonna kill her anyways because she’s dressed like mae. and so what, he’s just supposed to leave her there to be murdered for a misinterpretation or worse, killed because they don’t want anything to do with her (in his mind)? not saying that was SOLELY his intention, because he’s got warped perspectives left and right, but like even if he was on the light side would anyone do any different than this? and was he supposed to just tend to her wounds on the goddamn battleground of fallen jedi awaiting to be slaughtered by jedi and have osha get slaughtered with him (in his mind)? he basically HAD to take her even if he didn’t want anything directly from her. his own personal mantra was that he strikes down jedi, but others, so even if it wasn’t osha i believe he would’ve done the same thing for a person who had been abandoned and left to die by the people he considers his own oppressors.

once again, i am not saying he doesn’t also not want something from her, but i do think he’s just a low that while he does want something from her, he doesn’t necessarily expect her to believe or join him. he is vulnerable, feeling a little hurt from mae, and now has to reorganize his plan to strike down jedi because his cover was blown. they could find him easily now if they wanted, ESPECIALLY since he is with osha. remember him saying that her place in the force is what drew people near to her? he’s basically in a position he could quite literally not gaf if he was killed, just a frayed wire with no intention right away of having himself reconnected and at the height of his power.

even leslye said that qimir was ready to die if osha wanted to ignite the saber, genuinely. so many vibes i picked up from him this episode were depressed and defeated. he’s vulnerable with all these emotions and while he’s interested in osha, at the moment of the episode he’s just ready for whatever happens, even if that meant death.

manipulation/inherent toxicity is present in *just* about every star wars ship that starts off on enemy frontlines. but what everyone means when they say there’s no manipulation they mean the kind of manipulation that leslye is referring to: twisting the truth to make osha submissive to him, wholeheartedly knowing what he’s saying is just a power play to get her to become his toy. leslye admitted that he’s being honest, as much as he thinks his version of honesty is, so even in his own honesty he could be using that to “enlighten” her, but not in the way where he knows he’s being disingenuous and purposely trying to create an unequal dynamic with him in the lead.

this is the kind of manipulation that so many have thrown at the ship as a reason against it, which is why so many stans talk about it and celebrate that leslye had our back because the idea of a more equal, non-manipulative (in that above sense) etl relationship being confirmed allows us to shrug off discourse like that without feeling the weight of its dogpilling.

[anothermansjeans]

Ok so I have an idea what if Spencer Reid’s s/o wears lolita dresses:D or or maybe gyaru too I just love both of the styles and or a metal head reader I just have so many ideas for what the reader could wear:)

i am SO sorry i'm doing this so late :( i hope you like it!!

cw: reader wears dresses, reader has a metalhead aesthetic, reader's feelings are a little hurt (it's okay though!!), very much fluff

wc: 435

masterlist

++

When you first met Spencer, no one would ever picture the two of you ending up together.

To be honest, you couldn't even picture it at first– meeting him at a cafe you ran into to get a fix of coffee, dressed in your gothic-style lolita dress, you didn't clock the six foot man in a cardigan until you accidentally bumped into him. From there on out, he told you some facts about the gothic style and how it often gets misconstrued or misinterpreted, and you were a goner.

The first few months of dating were incredible, both being in your little bubble, but it only popped when you met his team.

They were nice… but very wary of you. You could tell that they didn't understand you or the look you had, and you get that, you do. Not everyone has a metalhead-esqu style. The problem arose when one of them tried to make a joke saying they “went through that phase in high school.”

It kind of turned you off a little bit. You became very quiet around them, and only really spoke when spoken to. Spencer caught onto your introvertedness immediately though (you were pretty well reserved but you went in with meeting the team confidently), and squashed everything right then and there the moment he found out. You tried to let him know it wasn't that big of a deal, you’re an adult and can get over it, but his team had never seen him so riled up. They instantly apologized, making sure to let you know they had no ill intent, and you forgave, even going out with Penelope every month to go shopping (she told you about her style pre-BAU and you were going to do everything you could to bring back some of that).

After that, everything in the land of you and Spencer was fine and dandy. People would give you weird looks every now and then due to the very different styles you had, but you couldn't give a shit.

Tonight, you and Spencer were walking to one of the movie festivals he heard about, and on your way there, a woman was walking the opposite way, and smiled. “You two look so cute together!”

Your hands were intertwined and you both looked at her with shy smiles, “thank you,” you said together, and continued walking. When you were a good distance away, you looked at Spencer and let out a laugh. “You know what? We do look cute together.”

He gave your hand a squeeze and leaned over to kiss your temple. “That we do.”

[prapaiwife]

Before love sea airs I do want to talk about love in the air again like I have many times before lol. But it's just about prapai and sky especially their relationship as a whole and now that it's been obviously like a whole year since the show and i watched it so many times and I still read a lot of people like negative comments about their relationship.

There's like two scenes in particular that stand out to me and so with the first one it's the scene in episode 12 when prapai reads sky's journal. And so I've seen so many people misinterpret that scene as pai being so invasive and overwhelming towards sky. When it is so far from that because from what we have seen from sky up till this point is he dissociates a lot. Which is understandable because of his traumatic past. But prapai didn't read the journal to torture sky he didn't do it out of any malicious intent. He read the journal to see where Sky's mind was really at because the things that sky was saying didn't add up to all of the good times they had genuinely shared together. And he knows sky up to this point that he won't tell him his honest feelings he will only shut down. Him reading out loud having sky listen to what he wrote was a way for him to make sky see that if this is how you really feel that's okay you can love me. And I understand that you can't tell me this because you're scared and so he made the first move towards sky for him to see like he has already fallen for him, he loves Sky for all that he is even though he thinks so little of himself. Sky couldn't even fathom pai liking him but at the same time in that journal he wanted pai to have eyes just for him he liked the attention the love and how attentive and caring pai was to him. He constantly worries on how to reciprocate that in some way so pai can see that he is just as interested in this as much as he is.

Sky wasn't going to tell him all this of what was read in that journal because that would make it all too real for sky. Pai just wanted sky to face his feelings and not in a torturous way. Sky hearing all that be spoken out made him really as we saw go into a like a very emotional state because he's in that moment now thinking he could possibly lose pai for good. But that's not what he's there for he wasn't there to break it off with him the way that sky did with him earlier in the episode. He just wanted an answer because he knows that this isn't sky like I said he sees sky and so he's not going to leave things to be when he can sense that no something is up. That hug at the end of the scene as well when Sky tells him that he loves him that's all pai wanted to hear and what he kind of already knew. But he made the first move first to tell that to sky so sky can see that it is okay because I love you just as much and I'll make the first move for us and put my feelings out there and tell you that I love you.

And if you've been watching the show it has been pretty clear as day that pai can clearly see something is wrong with sky he picked that up initially on episode 9. From that point on he always kept that to the forefront of his mind and this will also kind of explain people saying he was "stalking" sky. When literally he's been seeing this man not take care of himself at all he doesn't eat his meals he doesn't sleep he's getting sick, sky is pretty much abandoning himself. And so all pai did was step up and be that person for sky to see that he sees him he's not going to just let this go he's going to take care of him he's going to be there for him all the signs that sky was showing that others may have turned a blind eye too or couldn't tell. Pai knew something though which is why he followed sky so much around and try to be like a presence in his life. And in the whole process that was a big thing for sky because he doesn't trust anyone after what he went through understandably so. But him seeing the strides and the commitment that pai was making just for him touched his heart so much that he didn't want to admit it because he liked it. He was scared but he liked it this feeling he thought he would never feel ever again nor did he even want to imagine that this person could genuinely like him for him especially as to how he was treating pai prior to this by declining him so many times and by saying he doesn't care who he is and he doesn't want anything to do with him. But once pai set the record straight to him after he took care of sky when he was sick about his intentions of like I just want to take care of you that's it. Yes my intentions in the beginning were not as they were now but right now I wa wanna be that person for you.

And like when he was taking care of sky he saw him having these completely horrible nightmares which answers his question as to why he wasn't getting any sleep. And when he brings it up to sky he derives from that and doesn't go into detail which is fine but pai from that point on always comes over to his apartment.

He also sees how important school is to sky but how sky uses school, his school work as a distraction and lets it consume him more than it should he doesn't give himself any breaks he works from the time he comes back all the way to next morning most likely. To the point where he's up before all of his own friends. And so pai comes over regularly and helps him with his homework. He wants sky to rely on him he wants sky to see that you can call me text me whatever I'm always going to be accessible for you. And we see sky that starts leaning into that and gets comfortable with him coming over and helping him so much to the point where he kind of scared him unintentionally because of how urgent he needed his help lol.

And in ep 11 pai made it pretty clear of like I will always help you whenever but you have to be a little bit aware of how you sound to me this is the same man who he has saw have nightmares so for all pai knows sky might be in trouble or something more. And so he was upset out of worry because he didn't think sky is taking advantage of him he wants sky to call him he wants sky to to know that he's there for him.

But he also wants sky to know in that moment to just be more aware of his tone. I like that pai doesn't even stop him from helping him because he always wants to help sky if he asks for his help even if he doesn't pai is a helper and a giver he's a big brother after all. To two of his siblings so it falls in line with his character if you ask me it's not out of line him sticking around sky it's not stalker behavior. It's really him seeing this person who's clearly going through something in their life and they don't have anyone looking after them nor are they looking out for themselves and so they need someone who's going to be around them to just kind of keep an eye on them and make sure they're okay. Especially with pai knowing sky's father lives away and his mom as well. And so he gives him his meals everyday and so calls him to ask what he wants!

And then on episode 13 the last scene I wanted to mention. In the last episode after sky was almost about to be assaulted. Pai yells at sky but it wasn't meant to be taken I think in a horrible way. He's once again seeing sky dissociating from everything around him, including him. What he needed in the moment was for sky to see that's he's here. Cause as we know and see when sky gets like this he is completely cooped up and it makes it hard for pai to understand and or help him the best that he could.

And so when he did that it made sky realize who he's with. Sky really fully realized that pai was in front of him you can see like that relief in front of his face. And pai telling sky just asking him to just cry just to feel what he's feeling this moment because he knows it's not good and it's making him hurt just as much as sky, he's seeing the man that he loves in pain. They are both hurting in that scene but the same time sky was once again able to see that through pai reassuring words once again he's not alone as he thinks he is in his head about all of this.

He has this man in front of him that loves him so much he would do anything for him. And right now comforting him and taking care of him is what he's going to do. And no I'm not saying that pai can fix him but what he can do is be this amazing life partner for him and walk through every stage of his life with this with him. Because although this has happened hes gonna make sky see this doesn't define him it's not going to make sky as a person and I think he wants sky to see that.

I would say even in the special episode we saw a character growth and turns out sky was actually communicating his feelings to pai. In the bathtub scene when he tells him he doesn't like having his exes coming up to him and telling him how they dated him and how he's going to leave you just pretty much dishing out of pai used to be before he met sky. Pai heard him out and said I'm so sorry that my past is still becoming a hindrance it seems sometimes in our relationship because of the people that I've been with and them being so disgusting towards you. I will make sure that that doesn't ever happen again and in that way I love it because sky says I know you love me you love me so much and it just shows that like he doesn't even how to think twice about pai love for him because he can see it clear as day. And so he has no problem now voicing out his uncomfortableness with that and telling him because he's like I know you love me and you will try to do something to help this not be such an issue. At the same time this guy was like I'm still going to get my little payback just because lol but it just shows their communication is so much better and sky is able to have a lot more confidence in himself as to when he told that ex off in the restaurant. Because he's so much more confident I think in his relationship with pai and himself.

Okay that's it just thinking about it and needed to write it out 😭😭

[lexsssu]

Clear (Albedo)

TAGS: Albedo/Dragoness!reader, smut, pregnancy, drabble Ao3 ver. | Ko-fi | Commissions (OPEN)

“Fascinating. You are truly an anomaly that goes against all known laws of this world, but then again...you are not of this world so I suppose that does partially explain how you keep exceeding my expectations.”

You feel like a lab rat beneath the probing gaze of Mondstadt’s Chief Alchemist as he circled you, hands going a mile a minute as he recorded his latest findings about your ‘abnormal’ physiology. 

It was by pure chance that you found yourself at the Dragonspine of all places the moment you woke up in this world that felt the same, but was so different from your own. Though the blistering cold would freeze even the most hardy of adventurers or travelers, your former game avatar and now current body was seemingly immune to it. Like the monsters that called this terrain home, your draconic body warded off the cold as it produced heat that not only spread throughout your physical body but seemed to originate from your very soul. Being the researcher that he was while also being the first to stumble upon your wayward self, Albedo had taken it upon himself to study you.

“...Thank you, I think? ...Was that supposed to be a compliment though?”

“Affirmative. I had intended my previous words to be a compliment. Your body is truly a marvel to behold.”

Had he been any other person you’d have misinterpreted his words, but Albedo’s handsome face never strayed from its cool expression that stayed as pure and untarnished as the snow that piled high atop the peak of the Dragonspine. Still though, you were unused to genuine compliments due to being an ordinary wage slave with average looks before transmigrating to Teyvat so you couldn’t be blamed from feeling a little flustered because of his praise.

The alchemist disregarded the warmth that bloomed in his chest at the sight of the red tinge that splattered across the fullness of your cheeks, attributing the said warmth to your body basically being a furnace that it seeped into your surroundings and reached him because of his close proximity to you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Big sister is the best! She plays with Klee all the time, takes me out flying, and she’s just as patient with me as you are big brother!” Klee gushed excitedly at Albedo, practically vibrating in her spot as she regaled him with tales of their various misadventures. “She’s so pretty too! And, and, and her hair is so long and fluffy that Klee could spend the whole day just petting her hair. Even Razor thinks she’s pretty!...And Kaeya & Diluc too!”

Albedo paused his writing at Klee’s admission, an image of you flashing before his eyes and reminding him of your said snowy strands that felt like the softest silk beneath his fingertips. He recalls how carefree and unrestrained you are towards him, caring not how...different he was compared to most ordinary people. 

So much mystery contained in a single person and yet for all your secrets, he finds that he doesn’t mind unravelling you piece by piece even if it revealed another facet of you that he had yet to explore. It was safe to say that you were not so unlike the Dragonspine, uncharted territory in which no man has yet to fully or even partially unravel its countless secrets.

Was it wishful thinking if he wanted to be the one to discover all your hidden sides?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“To think that such a phenomenon is possible between creatures such as you and I...There are still many mysteries in this world that I have yet to discover the answers to,” a hint of wonder could be felt in his voice as he marveled at you, hands reverently caressing the small yet soft & firm bump on your stomach. “I do wonder if this child will also carry the aura of the stars which you possess…”

Even in the midst of coupling, Albedo’s tenacious mind couldn’t stop itself from functioning like the well-oiled machine that it was. As much as you loved him and all of his quirks however, an obviously pregnant and horny dragoness was not patient enough to allow her lover and the father of her child to simply pet her when he had his cock shoved inside her cunt. 

“Albedo-dear I do so love you, but if you insist on carrying on with your research while we’re IN THE MIDDLE OF FUCKING then I swear to all the archons in Teyvat that I will tie you down and fuck myself on your cock until I am satisfied. IS.THAT.CLEAR?”

“...Crystal”

[kvtnisseverdeen]

This is my humble take…

Joe Alwyn was Taylor’s best boyfriend. She knows this and her fans know this. But he demands actual work and accountability. Taylor is a white rich conservative girl first and foremost. And she’s very narcissist. Joe is the first boyfriend of hers to put actually limits on how her public personal affects him and their relationship. And she liked dating him at first because he was private and reserved and she was desperately trying to scape the industry and she found the most non-industry British man ever. She liked that security and knowing he didn’t attract that much attention. Then, she slowly gained her reputation back on track and realized that she could finally go back to being the person that plays for the media again. And yes, maybe her relationship with Joe was slowly fading — it happens a lot. But she clearly says in her lyrics that wanting to be shown off in public is one of the reasons too. Because she likes that every relationship she’s in gets consumed by her fans and the media.

And Joe Alwyn required her to go and do some work on herself! He comes from a very activist family. He was the one that made her be more open about social activism. It was because of him that she tried to do the bare minimum like encouraging during elections, have more racially diverse people on her music videos and tours, and do a very cringey job at supporting lgbt rights. But it was at least something…

Isn’t funny that the moment they broke up she went back to being very problematic? The climate terrorist that she’s been for the pass year and then wanting to sue people for spreading her private flights information (knowing this is public information). Then dating that racist man that mocked woman of color and admitted to watch what he did, being quiet about the war that’s going on, and the lame and immature issue she created over some of Olivia Rodrigo’s songs (a literal new artist and teenager at the time) to the point she cut total ties with her and her next man being a very typical conservative macho man that seems to love the attention just like her. She’s back at being who she’s always been…

“Your integrity makes me feel small” Yes, Taylor, indeed. I am glad you know this too.

oh you absolutely have said it all. this is extremely well said and on point.

i find it so odd that most swifties can't pinpoint that the real issue between joe and taylor was taylor once again giving into the industry and being a rich white capitalist which is something joe is not and does not want to be, and most likely caused the demise of their relationship. taylor herself has said this in her songs (like the lyrics in peace, as you said). so yeah, maybe she wanted marriage but joe probably wasn't comfortable marrying someone who had completely different morals than him which is his right. let's be real here.

and oh the relationship between her and travis probably set her "redemption arc" far back than ever. she really was finally speaking up on so many matters and now she's dating a problematic trump supporter, giving into the media frenzy with the NFL, and has done no activism despite having the biggest platform. i think what sucked the most was her being times person of the year and using it to talk about travis and how she wasted 6 years of her life being private. so disappointing. and the cherry on top are some of the lyrics from ttpd (ex. 1830s racism lyric) like WHAT?

another thing swifties misinterpret is that no one would've known joe if it wasn't for taylor and that he's living off of his songwriting credits from folklore/evermore. joe who is notoriously low-key and has stated he just wants to be seen as human never used taylor for clout and has avoided saying her name in interviews, even after the break-up. not because he didn't love her, but because he did not want to feed into the media frenzy. and if all eyes are on him, he's using it to make a statement about palestine which is amazing. sure, you may not have known joe alwyn if it wasn't for taylor but he never used taylor's fame to make him more famous. and might i argue, it was taylor who despite releasing positive songs about him sometimes didn't defend him (like in the folklore sessions where jack antonoff was obviously being rude to him? or how she told her fans not to go after john mayor releasing speak now tv but didn't say anything for joe when her fans have been harassing him like crazy?)

on the other hand, we have travis kelce who has most definitely brought her up in every capacity like on his brothers podcast and let's be real, most of the swifties didn't know who travis was (i didn't!) unless they were football fans. we saw proof of that when NFL sales and viewership was significantly higher. so yes, travis is using her name for clout and feeding into the media frenzy. and then you have swifties saying he loves her and supports which yes, can be true, but you cannot deny that taylor and travis' relationship fed the media, fed the NFL, and diverted attention from more important issues like gaza. and while taylor and travis had their eyes on them, they didn't use it to do any good.

so yes, you are right. joe was taylor's best boyfriend.

[thestrangestthing89]

Mike understanding Will vs. Mike being oblivious

Evidence that Mike knows what Will is talking about in the van:

Will: "I didn't say it", Mike: "You didn't have to" - You're telling me that after they say this, Will is now going to have to spell out his feelings for Mike to understand? They wrote this line for a reason.

Mike has always been very emotionally aware of Will. We see that this season at the skating rink when it seems like Mike is ignoring him. He lists all these things Will's done (rolling his eyes, etc.). He pays attention to Will. We've seen this in past seasons, too. The only time he was shown to not be aware of Will's feelings was briefly in season 3 was when him and Lucas were making fun of him over D&D. The second Mike realizes he actually hurt him, he runs after him to apologize and he never does this again. Mike was so busy pretending to be all grown up and like Lucas he missed what was happening with Will. But he figures it out quickly and fixes it.

Will: "You make her feel like she's not a mistake". Will says this line when he's giving Mike the painting and pretending his feelings are El's. Mike knows this isn't true. Him and El had a fight in Lenora and El said "You looked at me like I'm a monster". This fight happened a few days before Will says this. Mike didn't forget. He knows what they fought about. He knows he makes El feel like a monster because she told him.

Mike: "I care for you so much". This line is so platonic and self-aware. She wants him to tell her he loves her and deliberately avoids saying it. He knows what she wants him to say. He blurted out he loves her at the end of season 3, makes a confused face after he says it, tries to awkwardly talk to her and explain that he loves her while avoiding saying the word and confuses her in the process. Then when she brings it up later, he pretends like he doesn't remember and says "that was just heat of the moment stuff". She says it back to him and he's confused and doesn't respond. Then he spends the next several months avoiding saying it the letters he writes her. This is again, very self-aware. It would be very easy to write this. Especially if he already said it out loud. He recognized at the end of 3 that he didn't mean it and didn't say it again.

He throws away 2 of her letters that we see. It's implied he isn't keeping them.

He flirts with Will twice in Lenora. Not to mention how flirty they were at the end of season 3 when they are packing up they Byer's things.

Mike's emotional intelligence has been on display several times throughout the series. Not only does he take care of Will but they have many heart-to-heart conversations where he is empathetic and understanding. He listens to Will. But we also see him do this a little with El in season 1. When they first find her he acknowledges that she's scared and gives her a place to stay and food. He didn't have to do this. It shows emotional maturity. He is aware of other peoples feelings. He doesn't register that Lucas is jealous of the time he's spending with her because he is honestly not spending a lot of time with her. I just rewatched season 1. Their time together is limited. So when Dustin calls him oblivious for not realizing why Lucas was jealous, it really just doesn't add up logically with what was actually happening. Which is why Mike doesn't register this. It's not obliviousness. Dustin and Lucas are misinterpreting the situation.

He looks like he's in physical pain giving his I love you monologue to El. He is more than capable of listing things he likes about a person. There is a reason Will calls him the heart. He connects emotionally to people (Will specifically) but he can't do that with El. He knows he is lying. All of his behavior up until this point suggests he knows this.

Him and El aren't speaking at the end and are rolling their eyes at each other. He isn't even attempting to talk to her. If he believed anything he said he wouldn't be acting like this. He would be trying to talk to her or comfort her when she's clearly upset. When they get to the cabin he just completely ignores her and walks ahead and leaves her behind at the car without a second glance back. This isn't obliviousness and a lack of emotional awareness. We see him 2 minutes later talking to Will and telling him she's upset she lost and then comforting Will about Henry. He knows and understands what people are feeling and what the correct responses are to emotional situations. He doesn't comfort El because he doesn't want to and he knows she doesn't want him to. He is aware of this. She's rolling her eyes at him, too. The only time they aren't stand offish with each other is at the hospital. She leans her head on his shoulder in a very Harry and Hermione like way. He lets her. It's what she needs in the moment. He's not confused by this or shoving her off. (Edit: I want to add here that Will is crying after he gives Mike the painting and Mike sees him. Why would Will be crying if he's talking about El's feelings? If Mike believes what Will is saying is actually El than he would have asked about what upset him because it doesn't add up. Will wouldn't be crying over another couples feelings. It only makes sense if he's crying about his own. Mike doesn't ask him what's wrong because he knows. He knows Will just confessed and it was hard for him so he doesn't have to ask. He also can't say what he wants to say with other people in the car so he gives Will space. Also just look at Mike's face in this scene. It says everything you need to know. Especially when you compare it to his face during his monologue to El. He's so happy when Will is talking to him and he never looks at El like that.)

Evidence that Mike is oblivious:

Mike is never actually SHOWN to be oblivious, we just have characters saying that he is. Dustin and Lucas say it in reference to the way that he acts TOWARD EL. Not towards Will. He doesn't respond to El the way that someone who has a crush on her does which is why they say he is oblivious. He doesn't act like a boyfriends is supposed to so they help him. They are realizing he isn't acting that way for a reason. Mike has never be called oblivious in reference to Will.

Finn says Mike is oblivious and clueless. Of course he does. He can't say that he knows what Will is talking about. It's a spoiler. I don't know why people take these interviews so seriously. The actors can't say anything. They frequently say things that aren't true because they were instructed to. Interviews are to promote the show. And the audience is in the dark about Mike's feelings so he can't say more than this. The oblivious excuse is so easy. It allows people to dismiss a lot of other things that are going on. It's superficial. But the show is never what it seems on the surface. They like to show and not tell. So if they are TELLING us that Mike is oblivious, then we need to pay attention to what they are SHOWING us. They have never shown us that he has no idea what's going on. They have shown us the opposite. It's a misdirect. They want people believing he's oblivious so that when they show us the truth it's completely unexpected. Most of the audience has the wrong perception of him. And honestly, a lot of the insistence that Mike is oblivious is coming from people who desperately want him to have romantic feelings for El at some point even if they think Byler is endgame. I don't understand this need for these two to be romantically involved. There is the bare minimum being done with the way they interact. They are being intentionally written to not understand each other or be good for each other and it's been consistent since the beginning. Just because one is a boy and one is a girl and they are cute kids doesn't mean they need to be crushing on each other. It isn't being SHOWN.

[destinygoldenstar]

I want to talk about THIS scene from the episode "The Forgotten Element" in Season 4

This was the scene that spawned many Evil Kai AU fanfictions.

(And like... I get it)

As a kid, I was always jaw dropped by this scene, but I didn't understand this scene too much.

Like, what was the point of this Evil Kai AU if it was for a minute and it was resolved so quickly?

They were building this up the entire episode and even before it, so was that all for nothing? Did it not mean anything? What was the point of this anyway?

And then it clicked with me WHY that was.

The problem was that I was only focusing on what's present in the moment and not all around it.

In the moment itself, Kai is holding the staff, it holds too much power, it corrupts him and spills all of is bottled up negative emotions about destiny and the Green Ninja, how he feels about it all being wrong, that he was somehow 'not good enough' compared to a child, and how he should've been the one with all the power all the glory and all the abilities in is veins.

"You had all the power, now it's my turn!"

"Nothing that I don't already feel!"

"I should've been the Green Ninja!"

That's straight up TELLING.

And it makes sense. Kai wanted to be the Green Ninja more than anyone ever since he heard of that prophecy. Ever since he was told he was the Master of Fire by Wu he went from 'do everything for Nya and be a parent' to 'I can be special and worthy in a way I couldn't ever see in myself'. And then it all turned out to be for nothing, Kai being 'special' was all a lie, and the prophecy went to this bratty kid that Kai was tasked to babysit. Then Lloyd would proceed to be very well recognized and Kai was just... the forgotten member that nobody understands the motives of. 'You wanted to take the place of someone who did something sacrificially heroic? How dare you. SELFISH.'

BUT WE ALL KNOW THAT.

This all sounds like a villain origin story that would happen in the season, right?

The build up is all there. The bottled up emotions. Skylor's influence. Chen taunting him in this episode about it and getting into his head about his parents, something that is VERY PERSONAL to Kai.

So if it ended up being just ONE MOMENT and that's it, then this was all for nothing, right?

NO.

Why? Because that's not what this aspect of the episode is about at all.

This was all NOT build up to Kai becoming a villain.

This was about Kai REJECTING that villainous side of him.

He's been 'on the villain's side' at the start of the episode when Chen decided not to enslave him.

Another motif of this episode is what gets said over and over again in the B plot of the episode, that being the prison escape from the Noodle Factory. "The power of positive thinking"

Kai is learning this as well, but it's his own personal battle to come to that. Part of being positive is being positive about yourself.

He's been scolded for being selfish constantly. Again, how dare he want to take someone's place, someone who was better than him in every way and they all knew it. These people are oblivious, they can't read his mind, they're misinterpreting his words, and for some reason nobody apologizes for that.

We've seen him be insecure of his own abilities. When he feels like he can't do something, he goes 'If only I had this ability'. An example being the Digiverse.

Part of the lesson there was that he had to allow himself to have the power he needed to get out of a tight spot. As an old fashion and a devoted brother, makes sense why he'd struggle with this.

And then when Chen gets in his head, it's the same thing again, he's selfish and he wants the power and that's all he cares about.

Everyone is saying you're selfish, therefore it must be true.

And this is the first time Kai ever actually CALLS THE PERSON OUT for accusing him of being one dimensionally selfish.

Yes he falters back when Chen mentions his parents, but that's still a notable step. (And he would continue to call out their accusations in Possession)

The episode consists of Kai being on the villain's side and playing the role of the deceiver. Him being smart by playing the emotions of Chen and Skylor rather than be a logical thinker. (WOW. An episode that doesn't make Kai dumb and instead makes him smart in a way that fits his character. That is sad how rare that's shown anymore.)

And to do that he had to convince everyone that he was on the villain's side and that he has turned.

So THIS moment is not build up to Kai becoming a villain truly, it's a test on this own side of him that he must acknowledge exists. How this way of thinking isn't healthy, it's petty, it's not worth it, and he shouldn't be lingering on something when he himself is capable of so much.

And then NO ONE EVER TALKS ABOUT HOW KAI WAS THE ONE WHO BROKE THE STAFF AND I DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT.

He could just grab the staff again and be corrupted again, and that's it. But HERE, there is no one paying attention to him to tell him what to do.

Which means this is all Kai's choice.

This is Kai CHOOSING to REJECT that villain inside him, and instead proceed to a more positive outlook, one that would benefit everyone.

That's countering all the selfish accusations more than anything else.

As a kid I was confused as to why there wasn't a scene where Kai acknowledged what happened when he was corrupted and how you go from that to 'Kai wants to protect Lloyd'

Him breaking the staff IS that scene. (It's just so fast that it's hard to see on a first couple viewings) He NEVER wants to see himself as that corrupted figure again, and is willingly choosing what role he wants to play now. That's the transition there from that Kai to Possession Kai. (Possession Kai = Best Kai)

This is one of my favorite episodes of the show because of how much justice was done here in so many ways.

[the-music-maniac]

Zoro has rapidly become my favourite character in One Piece and so I felt the need to write this after seeing one too many people misinterpret him as this alpha male type of dude purely because he's muscular and likes fighting. Don't do my boi like that, I actually think Zoro is a very good example of non toxic masculinity, and I will fight people over it. I've seen someone call Zoro a red flag. I will find you.

I've seen this happen quite often when it comes to characters with certain body types and defining traits, especially in shows with large followings like one piece, where people just tend to equate muscular + likes to fight + likes to drink to a certain archetype of personality without looking at the nuance? In reality, Zoro is a very likeable guy in my opinion (once you get over how terrifying he can be as an opponent).

Disclaimer: I haven't finished the entire show so feel free to write any rebuttals if you think I got anything wrong! Fandom debates can be quite fun.

I also mention Sanzo/Zosan very briefly so feel free to skip over that part if you're not into that ship.

The biggest thing I think people tend to forget is that Zoro is kind. And this one I don't understand how anyone can forget, because it's like an integral part of his character. Sure, his goal of becoming the greatest swordsman is not a path that's without bloodshed. He's not kind in an all encompassing, indiscriminate way, he's kind in a practical way, especially in the world he lives in with the type of life he leads. He doesn't have qualms about killing when necessary. But the motivation behind those actions are never cruel. He wants to be the greatest swordsman, but he's not amassing that skill because he wants power. He's doing it for love of that weapons style and for the childhood dream both Kuina and him had. Does he like fighting? Yeah, but I'm pretty certain it's purely for the competition of skill. And Zoro shows his kindness with how willing he is to help those who need it, in that he usually doesn't use his strength to take what he wants/hurt others but to protect. Even when he was a bounty hunter and earned his moniker of Demon of the East, he was just trying to survive. I'm not sure how people forget that he's a kind person when our initial introduction to Zoro was him agreeing to get tied to a post for a month without food or water to save a little girl and her mother. He's kind in the little ways as well, in that mundane everyday living type of manner, not just in the big, heroic "risk your life" type of way, which I think is important to acknowledge. He didn't have to tell that girl that her food was good. And Zoro is pretty damn good with children - we see that with Chopper, and we see that with that filler episode with Zoro babysitting and - I think there are some more examples but I can't recall them right now. That's a very big green flag in my opinion. The little gestures can matter as much as the big ones. As far as I'm concerned, those traits couldn't be further from the "alpha male" stereotype.

I've also seen people characterize Zoro as just a cool, quiet, man-of-few-words type of guy, and sure, I can see how he would give that impression if all you saw of him was random edits of when he gets serious but honestly, the man is pretty fucking sassy. He's also just - SUCH a 19 year old with all the antics he gets up to with the rest of the crew, and I'm aware he gets much more serious after the timeskip (I haven't gotten to that point yet in terms of watching but I don't care about spoilers so I know the reason behind it), but like. I don't think he lost his snark from some clips I've seen. Zoro is funny, and I think people ignore that too often for the cool guy type of characterization. Not that he isn't cool - Zoro has his moments but that's not all he is. The man gets lost running in a straight line???? He once almost got frozen in wax and decided his priority was to ensure he died in a cool pose. That type of willingness to be silly is not something you find in a stereotypical alpha male type of personality. Like, who are you kidding, he's lame af, unashamed of it, and it's fabulous.

Another thing, granted this is not a common opinion by any means, but on one instance I've seen someone act as if Zoro's some lady killer or some shit and I actually had to pause and stare at my screen in disbelief. Could I see women being attracted to Zoro? Yeah sure, I mean the one example I can think of right now is Hiyori (another example may or may not be me. But then again you knew that didn't you, considering this post is just one giant love letter to Zoro). But does Zoro purposely try to attract women? Uh no? I don't even think the man is straight. He's either aromantic/asexual (very ace of him to not give a shit about romance but leap up in two seconds upon hearing the word "sword") or just gay, cause he exhibits very little interest in romance, or very little indication that he finds women attractive. And I pinpointed attraction to women specifically just cause people tend to assume Zoro is heterosexual and have the audacity to get mad at you if you try to imply otherwise. Which to me is clearly heteronormativity speaking because where. Where is he straight, I don't see it. And sure is there a possibility he may be heterosexual and just unwilling to act on attraction because he has a different goal in life? Yeah sure, but you can't act like that's the only valid interpretation for him. But regardless, no matter what sexuality you headcanon him as, he's still very very far from "manly man with ladies swooning left and right into his muscular arms" type character. I mean if someone swooned into him I'm pretty sure he would catch them on principle without registering any romantic connotations whatsoever. (Note that these opinions do not stop me from being a Sanzo/Zosan shipper, but that's more because I find the concept entertaining. An argument could also be made that Zoro does pay the most attention to Sanji, even if it's to fight him). So yeah, another strike against the whole alpha male type of characterization. Zoro doesn't really give a shit about romance and even if he DID, I am convinced he still wouldn't treat a potential romantic partner as anything but an equal, doesn't matter if that s/o is a man, woman or non binary. And this segways into my next point.

Because Zoro has some very refreshing attitudes about gender, both his own and of other people. This doesn't just tie in with the sexuality/romantic partner thing, it ties into the willingness to be authentic/silly thing, and the "likes to compare skills through fighting" thing. I very much think that Zoro just doesn't really register gender roles much, or he does and he just doesn't care about it. And I'm aware this partially stems from a position of privilege he has as a guy - he doesn't need to care about gender roles and how people view him because he's a man. He wouldn't be short changed for anything if he doesn't notice. While the same luxury is not extended to individuals like Kuina and Tashigi, who were in a field of practice that looks down on them purely for being women. Having said that, Zoro literally just doesn't give a shit who he's dealing with, man, woman or any other gender. If you challenge him, he'll fight you. And the level of effort he gives that fight is usually dependent on ability and the situation. If you annoy him, he'll annoy you back. He has no qualms about snarking and yelling at Nami the same as he would with a male member of the crew. People in the past that have pointed out to him the difference in the way the rest of the world perceives men and women - like with Kuina and Tashigi for example - is met with confusion. And again, this is partially because Zoro has the privilege of not noticing, but honestly even if he did notice, I don't think his personal actions would change. And I find that refreshing. I love Sanji as a character, don't get me wrong, but his whole refuses to fight women schtick is something that annoys me (even if I do headcanon that it partially comes from a place of trauma). And moreover, Zoro gives me the impression of a person that doesn't give a shit if his own masculinity is "compromised", going by the stereotypical definition of the phrase. He does shit cause he feels like it, not cause it's the "manly" thing to do. Yeah, he happens to like drinking, working out - things that are considered traditionally masculine, but I get the sense that if he did have hobbies that were not traditionally masculine, he would just go ahead and do them regardless of what people think of him. His antics pre-timeskip wasn't exactly the epitome of manliness, it was silly and goofy and he has no qualms about it cause it was authentically him. And he wouldn't feel threatened if he were to do anything not in keeping with a "manly" image, even if he wouldn't do any of that of his own volition. Like the babysitting filler episode? The man was in a crop top that said "mama" on the front. I fully believe that if he lost a bet to Nami and had to wear a dress or some other traditionally feminine piece of clothing, or if for some convoluted reason Luffy ordered him to put on a disguise like that for some mission or whatever, Zoro wouldn't give a shit as long as it was comfortable and didn't obstruct his ability to fight. If someone made fun of him for it, he would probably bite back depending on how insulting the person is trying to be, cause not caring about wearing non masculine clothing doesn't mean he would be okay with someone looking down on him, but he wouldn't automatically equate the two to each other without that interference, and that association wouldn't be permanent. Would he choose to wear a dress on his own? Probably not. He does still have clothing preferences and they tend to be simple, practical and comfortable, and with certain clothing pieces, in keeping with his culture. Would he fly into an insecure rage about not being a girl? I don't think so. And that's so far in attitude from the whole alpha male thing that it's not even funny. The whole concept of an identity centered around being an alpha male reeks of insecurity, and Zoro is very secure in who he is as a person.

And this is also why I think Zoro would act differently in a romance than how "alpha males" would act, even if it's with a woman (I still don't think Zoro is straight btw, but just for conjecture). For one he respects people based on ability and if not that, determination and heart, so right off the bat he's not gonna treat his partner as lesser than him by virtue of being a woman. And I've noticed that a lot of heterosexual couples (not all, mind you, but a lot) seem to care more about dating a gender role than dating an actual person. By that, I mean individuals who pride themselves on being a model of masculinity however they define it - usually look for a partner to compliment them in that regard. I find this counterproductive, because your partner is not meant to be a tool/accessory to maintain your image, and also because being the perfect man or woman is too narrow of a definition, and it doesn't exactly leave you a lot of room to live comfortably as a human - with all your fallible moments that don't fit comfortably in little boxes. It's impractical and illogical. If you value maintaining the status quo and assigning responsibilities and roles based on arbitrary rules assigned by society instead of ability, if you care about that more than you care about helping your partner and maintaining a functional life, I don't think y'all are gonna last long. That's just my two cents. But for the reasons listed before, Zoro barely even registers gender roles, and he's a pretty "get shit done" type of person. He's not gonna give a shit. He'll do what he's able to do for the relationship, and he wouldn't feel insecure when his partner does the same, even if it doesn't fit into traditional roles. And considering Zoro's love of sparring/fighting I don't think he would get with a partner that isn't able to give him a run for his money anyways. Another thing that sets him apart from the alpha male stereotype, those guys are terrified of anyone challenging them for their position of "authority", however dubious that position is (and however stupid it is to care about notions of dominance for a relationship. Have y'all seen those interview videos with guys who actually believe that? "I can't date a girl that bench presses more than me cause that means she becomes the dominant figure in the relationship" excuse me what.)

This post is getting overly long so I'm going to end it there. Thanks for reading!

[theadorableapprentice]

You Must Be Mad

MC x Solomon Warnings: Fluff Word Count: 894

A/N: Another Solomon story... But my next story will be either Satan, Barbatos, or Belphegor as I have stories planned for all three of them! I hope you enjoy this!

You were pacing in your bedroom, completely lost in your own thoughts. Not even the nasty weather outside could distract you. 

Did he really love you too? Was Asmo right? No, there was no way. Solomon keeps everyone at arms length… But Asmo would know better than anyone… Right? I mean, he seems to know Solomon the best. And Asmo had a point. Solomon does try to spend a lot of time with you. He would drop anything to help you. And there was that one time you thought he was going to kiss you… But surely you misinterpreted what was happening. Surely. 

Lightening strikes outside and you don’t stop thinking about it. Thinking about every interaction.

“MC, I saw this trinket while I was out and it reminded me of you… So here you go!”

“MC, I saw a cat that reminded me of you! Would you like to see?”

“MC, I have to go to the human world to pick something up for Diavolo. Do you want to come with? We can stop by that store you really like.”

Okay, so maybe he did go out of his way to spend time with you… But that doesn’t mean he has feelings for you. Those are totally things friends do too. 

You could almost hear Asmo’s voice in your head refuting that. “Yes, friends can do those things, but not Solomon. Stop denying it.”

Why were you denying it? If he had feelings for you back, that would be great, right? So why hasn’t he said anything? No, you know the answer to that. Fear of rejection and also there’s the whole thing of him losing so many loved ones so confessing to you could bring him more pain in the end… But wait, why should he have to confess anyways? 

No, you’re going to confess to him. You’re going to do something big and dramatic for him because he deserves that. He does big and dramatic things for you, so why shouldn’t you do something for him? But what should you do? Actually, you knew exactly what you were going to do. And hopefully he would find it equally as sweet as he will funny. 

Standing in the pouring rain outside of his window at Purgatory Hall, you wondered why you thought this was a good idea. You cast a small spell that would amplify your voice so Solomon could hear you over the rain and the thunder. 

“But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Solomon is the sun. Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, who is already sick and pale with grief, that thou, her maid, art far more fair than she. Be not her maid since she is envious. Her vestal livery is but sick and green, and none but fools do wear it. Cast it off.”

Solomon appeared at the window, opening it and looking really concerned. “MC? What are you doing out there? You must be mad coming here like this!”

You smiled. “It is my gentleman, O, it is my love! O, that he knew he were! He speaks, yet he says nothing. What of that?”

Solomon looked even more confused, but a slight blush dusted his cheeks. “MC, are you quoting Shakespeare at me?”

You tried not to laugh. You skipped ahead a few lines. “He speaks! O, speak again, bright angel, for thou art as glorious to this night, being o'er my head.”

Solomon let out a small laugh. “Hold on, MC.” Solomon closed his window and a moment later the front door opened and he met you outside in the pouring rain. “It’s a little wet to be outside, don’t you think?��

“I find it increases the drama.” 

“And, why exactly are you dramatically quoting Shakespeare to me?”

You gently grabbed his hands in yours. “Solomon the Wise, the most wonderful sorcerer and best human being I know, you mean more to me than I can describe with words. When I see you or hear from you, my heart does a little happy dance.”

“MC, I-”

“Solomon, let me finish. You are one of the smartest, funniest, kindest, and most chaotic people I know. Now that you’re in my life, I would feel as if something were missing if you were gone. All of this is to say, I’m quoting Shakespeare at you because I am without a doubt in love with you… And if Asmo tells me to tell you one more time I might have to strangle him.” You chuckled at the end of that, but smiled up at Solomon.

Solomon chuckled too. “Yeah, he can be a bit persistent, can’t he? MC, you didn’t have to do all of this for me. A simple ‘I love you’ text would’ve sufficed.”

You shook your head. “No way. You deserve big dramatic gestures of love. So now that we have that established, can we have the classic kiss in the rain?”

Solomon was about to say yes when lightening struck a tree not too far away from you guys. “Maybe we should skip that and go inside.”

You hurriedly nod and follow him into Purgatory Hall. 

Not so unfortunately, you and Solomon got sick and spent the week together. You could’ve probably used magic to make things better, but where was the fun in that?

[menlove]

Do you know where paul said 'this one' is about john? I can't find anything

yeye it's the audio interview in this post

Interviewer: Let me ask you about one of your new songs, ‘This One’. About a marriage? Paul: A relationship, yeah. Interviewer: And about not expressing emotions and feelings.  Paul: You get those moments where you always think; “I’m saving it up. I’ll tell him one day.” And you know what happens. A lot of people, John for instance, getting back to that subject. He died. Um.. I was lucky. The last few we- months that he was alive we’d managed to get our relationship back on track. We were talking, having real good conversations. Real, nice and friendly. George, actually, didn’t get get his relationship right. I think they were arguing ‘till the end, which I’m sure is a source of great sadness to him. And I’m sure in the feeling of this song that George was always planning to tell John he loved him, but time ran out. That’s what the song’s about. Like, there could never be a better moment than this one. Y’ know now. Take this moment to say… “I love you”

let's unpack.

first of all "a... relationship, yeah" is vague as shit & he can easily spin that around to say it's platonic if this ever came up again. but at the same time, it's interesting that he says "yeah" to that, confirming that the relationship in question (which he's about to say is his and john's) is similar to a marriage. and then this whoooole chunk

'I'm saving it up. I'll tell him one day." And you know what happens. a lot of people, John for instance (..)

(bold mine) so first of all, his VERY FIRST explanation of this song is saying it's something he wants to tell to a nebulous "him" one day. even if we're discounting john, noneeee of the lyrics in this song are very platonic, so at the very LEAST it's definitely confirmation of paul being queer. because he wants to tell "him" everything in this song. but then literally the very next sentence he's saying the "him" in question is, for instance, john. he's not necessarily saying the song is ONLY about john, as he also goes on to say the song might ring true for george about john, but he's saying his situation with john is the sort of situation he wrote this song about.

and a lot of people have used this quote to say he's shoving off his feelings for john onto george which is like. PARTIALLY true, i think he was trying to shift the focus off of him saying it was about john onto making it about george as well, but if you actually listen/read what he's saying that's not it at all.

"And I’m sure in the feeling of this song that George was always planning to tell John he loved him, but time ran out. That’s what the song’s about."

(bold mine) but he says "in the feeling of this song" so he's just saying that he thinks george can probably relate to the feeling of the song and relate it to his feelings for john as well. which is just. him again saying it's about john lmao he's just shoving george under the gay bus with him rip

and then:

"That’s what the song’s about. Like, there could never be a better moment than this one. Y’ know now. Take this moment to say… 'I love you'."

and that's about the gist of the song, really. and how many times has paul since john died talked about regretting not saying he loves him? i mean, the entirety of "here today" is about that. so taking that into account, and the amount of times he's admitted he never told him he loved him, his little bit up there about him and john making up and him being lucky for that doesn't negate the meaning of the song being regret at not telling "him" that he loved "him"

sorry, this got long. but i just see this quote around a lot w some interesting readings (& some blatant misinterpretation as well but what can ya do) so ! yeah it's pretty Unequivocally about john, or at the very least about a ""him"". which is insanely telling for a blatantly romantic song. when i tell you that this man is out to everyone but the public..........

[melalot]

TSATS BOOK REVIEW/ANALYSIS (aka i go over things i feel was misinterpreted in the book)

So I read TSATS book, and I’m realizing that a lot of stuff in the book was misinterpreted so I’m just gonna write this here to drop my 2 cents. 

Beyond this point there is spoilers

So personally y’all I loved the book, mainly because of how different and refreshing it is from other books.

I know this book had a co-writer, and honestly I’m glad there was a co-writer because I think the co-writer understood something that I felt like Rick has underplayed in many of his books.

How trauma affects people.

I mean this book was FULL of it, and I think it really flew over a lot of people’s heads as to how crucial Will and Nico’s past experiences and trauma’s shape them as they are and their whole relationship - now let’s go into more detail. 

First I want to say - to me this wasn’t a book about them going on a quest to Tartarus to save Bob. To me this was the story of Solangelo. I mean we literally have the nymph ask them both to tell them the story of them. And the book shifts between their current conflicts, while showing the past of how they came to be, how that led up to them now.

And I also want to remind you guys that they’re both 15 year olds, and that they’ve only been together for almost a year. Their relationship is still developing, but for what already is there? I am so surprised and honestly amazed and proud of how strong they are together, they balance each other out perfectly.

Let’s start with Will. 

I keep hearing about Will being shown as a chill guy that is laid back and stuff - but I feel like you guys are literally forgetting BOO Solace who literally made it his point to be adamant about having Nico realize he wanted to be his friend, and how he takes on the burden of healing every camper that comes to his infirmary. Like this boy ain’t chill - he’s got fucking anxiety y’all!!!!

But I loved reading Will’s POV and I loved reading the way he viewed himself and his relationship with Nico. Will is a son of Apollo, and he hasn’t been out in the real world as much as other demigods have like Percy and Annabeth and Nico, and the other 7. Sure he was at the Battle of Manhattan and he went through some things in the Gaea war, and some with Nero BUT actually going into a quest willingly like that? He never has, so he may not have as much of an understanding as other demigods will about their time in war and their struggles.

Will also didn’t have the same upbringing as Nico. He is a completely different individual. And I’m bringing this point because of the moments in the books where Will would talk badly about the Underworld and where he didn’t seem to understand it the way Nico did. 

Of course he wouldn’t understand it the way Nico did - he wasn’t Nico, but also he was surrounded by people who viewed the Underworld as a creepy place, so yeah Will kinda got roped into that stereotype. But you know what I admire about Will? That he recognized that he didn’t understand, and that he tried to view it the way Nico did, and eventually he did. Like sure he realized Nico would get irritated with him at times - but also they weren’t talking about what was really bothering them in those moments - so both of them had a right to be upset. 

I think Will was just also afraid of Nico going back to his old ways. We saw throughout the book that he was afraid of Nico leaving him, that he’d realize they’re too different - his insecurities about it. Because Will hasn’t gone through what Nico went through, and by the book, they’re supposed to be polar oppostites, but he didn’t let that stop him from from trying to understand his boyfriend. 

Will also had trauma with feeling like he had to fix everyone. He was a healer, he was the son of apollo, optimism and fixing things was his thing. I think the important thing towards the end of the book is him realizing he didn’t need to fix anyone, especially not Nico. Because Nico didn’t need fixing, he just needed someone who accepted him and understood him as he is. And Will came to understand that when he said he didn’t want to keep a version he made in his head of Nico, because he recognized that he was trying to fix him all along and was going about it the wrong way. Will allowed himself to accept some of his own darkness, which in turn gave Nico some of his light. Honestly it was truly beautiful that they added that part about love isn’t about people coming to save you from your tragic life and make you sudddenly love yourself. As per will and persephone’s convo - love is a choice made everyday. to understand and accept the person you want to be with. 

Now with Nico

Honestly it felt so refreshing to read Nico that was a lot happier and more himself and comfortable in his skin. To read about him accepting himself and being proud of it and being so openly affectionate with his boyfriend and vulnerable, is a complete 180 - and it goes to show how much he has healed because he himself DECIDED he didn’t want to shut people out of his life anymore

The patience Nico also had with Will in understanding that will was a different person so it would be harder for him to understand his second home was incredibly important, bc even tho he got irritated at him for it, he also recognized that he couldn’t be mad about something that someone didn’t understand. but he also saw how much will was trying, and will came around towards the end. they talked about what bothered them, they had their fights, but they RESOLVED IT.

another thing i loved about nico is his ability to want to understand another person and see their perspective. he did it with nyx and i thought that was so powerful, because it showed how he doesn’t see things in black and white, that he understands that the way people were brought up affect how they are in the real world, why he is the way he is. but he also doesn’t let it excuse them for their actions.

this whole book was about changing your life because YOU wanted to. understanding and accepting your past and trauma and learning to live with it BECAUSE you wanted to. Understanding one another to make a better relationship BECAUSE love is a choice.

the message is right there!!

so yeah, this book wasnt about a quest to save bob

it was their story, and it was absolutely amazing

the story of how they got together, their first kiss (which hello even if it was after the death of jason, they had gone months dating each other and let me just say the gays have a way of being impulsive mfs lollll, i still thought it was so them) the way they took care of each other, and the kisses, and the jokes, and the ways they understood each other so well and their train of thoughts and the sun lamp and the tokens and the ring and just them 

they’re soulmates

anyway ty for coming to my ted talk, this book was amazing and i loved it