#i just need to put signatures on my old art lmao

[pezimint]

posting some old art, this one is of my OCs, Felix! Contrary to the four leaf clover behind him, he is the Ultimate Unlucky Student!

I'm no longer part of the fandom but I still have my Danganronpa OCs I draw and use in RPs occasionally!

[beauleifu]

I’m back in my kung fu panda phase and I’m appreciating each moment of it HEHEHE Could we perhaps get the reader who grew up with Chinese martial arts and they’re often sparring with Macaque, while Mayor just watches behind and supports them both ? this is after lbd’s whole fiasco, and they’re all platonic friends !

Thank u fren, take your time with it and it’s totally okay if you can’t do it ! Don’t forget to drink water :Dc happy holidays !

YESSSS oh gosh i loved kung fu panda, such a good phase I respect you for that fren lmao

anyways, HOPE YOU ENJOY LOVELYY

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MACAQUE X READER X MAYOR

Lego Monkie Kid

Context: You. With the boys. Your best friends, who will support you no matter what (and also thoroughly enjoy the trials and terrors they put your sorry ass through). Today, you're training with Macaque on the temple grounds. Using weapons, like usual. What can go wrong?

CW: Language

***

"Carry me, I say!" You chirp, grinning widely.

Macaque stares down his nose at you, unimpressed. "It would be an insult to my strength. I've lifted stuff fifty times heavier than you."

You huff, scrunching your nose at him.

The three of you are strolling through the temple, admiring ancient pieces of Chinese weapons, offensive and defensive, as well as the armor section and a few old relics. However, your destination is the training hall, where you and Macaque shall test each other's fitness and skill levels after technically leveling up both areas. You feel confident, rolling your shoulders experimentally and tightening your grip on your signature fighting weapon.

Now, why three?

A certain bone demon chuckles. "Apologies, (Y/N), but you must carry yourself for now."

"And you won't do it instead?"

"I'm afraid not. I'd like to sit and watch," the Mayor hums, hands clasped neatly behind his back as he strolls alongside the two of you. Macaque pushes open the large, accented doors and you all head into the training arena. "We both know if I were to enter the fray, neither of you would last very long."

The shadow monkey snorts, gruffly assessing the bone demon's frame. "Sure. You're built like a twig."

You flash him a wink. "A dangerous twig with magical powers."

"Precisely why I shall extend my mercy," Mayor says, smiling lazily as he manifests a seat made of bones, settling down on the cushioned surface. "Now please, don't let me interrupt your fun."

Giving him a thumbs up, you turn to Macaque.

He's already grinning down at you, thick, dark eyebrows raised. "Ready to get clobbered?"

"It's a simple sparring match," you reason carelessly. "What could go wrong?"

"Heh. Cocky. I like it."

The two of you face off on either side of the arena, grinning stupidly at eachother. You're glad for times like these, where the three of you can just relax after the tedious and dangerous trials you went through. It certainly seems like the worst is over, though.

All at once, Macaque jabs forward, lightning quick.

You gasp with delight, ducking to the side with a gleeful yelp, and thus begins your sparring match edged with weapons and talons galore. Macaque's offensive start gives you the adrenaline rush you need to counter his attack, using your weapon to propel yourself against the wall. Knees bending like springs coiling tight, you spring forward and jut your spear at the dark furred simian- luckily the tip is dulled and capped.

"Oh ho ho~! You're quicker than usual," Macaque purrs, evading you as easy as the breeze. He takes a few steps behind you, and his tail hooks around your ankle, giving it a swift tug.

The yelp that leaves your lungs is muffled as you collide with the hard, cold surface of the temple sparring grounds, and with a grunt, you raise yourself onto your elbows. "Using your tail?? So that isn't cheating, but me throwing my shoe at you is an instant disqualification?"

Macaque shrugs, smirking. "Are I not allowed to used all parts of my body to defend myself? Unless the shoe was a part of your anatomy..."

"Oh, suck on a dragonfruit," you huff, pushing yourself to your feet.

Deep down, you know he's right, and it just entices you to roll your eyes. Mayor, of course, sides with the six-eared simian, although he doesn't verbally express his share of opinions. Merely, you catch that subtle smirk on his pale features as you spar with Macaque, the subtle quirk of his eyebrow indicating his amusement at your frustration. You're not surprised. The bone demon has yet to drop the chance to get on your nerves.

In the end, you're a breathless puddle of adrenaline with a lingering fight that becomes the only reason you can still swing an scythe. Poor you.

Macaque, on the other hand, hadn't even broken a sweat.

It's been an hour.

Does this guy ever run out of stamina??

When Mayor calls for a breather, you're all but willing to collapse on the plush couch he'd manifested for your sake, the frame made out of bone- of course. You grab your water bottle, taking a huge swing before dumping some of it over your face.

"So how'd I do, huhh?"

Mayor tuts, his trademark smile still ever-present. His eyes flick to Macaque, who joins the two of you and leaning against his staff, supported by his thick tail. The simian clears his throat.

"Good enough. You almost beat me like three times, so . . . props for sheer, absolute stubbornness."

You stick your tongue out at him, still breathless, but silent as the bone demon chuckles. "What our dear friend is trying to say, is that you're improving. Maybe one day you might have the chance to spar against myself, although . . ." He gives a sinister smile. "The chances are slim."

"Awww, cmon. You can't be that good," You huff doubtfully, kicking one leg over the other. An old man like him, putting up a fight worthy of the powerful demons in this realm? Unlikely. However, there's an odd glint in Mayor's eyes that leaves room for doubt.

Macaque's ears flatten. "(Y/N), trust me. I hate to admit it, but . . . Bones here is more powerful than ya think."

The look on your face must've gone noticed by none other than the bone demon himself, who's eyes narrow at your prolonged skepticism.

"Perhaps I demonstrate?"

You're caught off guard as he suddenly stands up, all business as he adjusts his suit and fixes his tie. With a lazy smirk, he extends his hand towards you, a display of misleading courtesy that belies an undercurrent of sinister intentions. Poor, oblivious, gullible you- who takes his hand and allows him to lead you into the sparring arena. You're practically giddy with excitement, totally ready to see what this old bag of bones is capable of.

"Oh, you're on, old man," you hum darkly, sizing him up through narrowed eyes.

Macaque takes your seat on the bone couch, arms crossed over his chest. "Hey- go easy on 'em, Bones," he calls out, looking disinterested. "I'd rather not have to explain this to MK."

"Oh, worry not, my dear," Mayor chuckles humorously, letting you go in order to cross to the other side of the arena. Once there, he spins on his heel, eyes narrowed yet entirely focused on you. "I merely seek to avenge my status, as our dear little mortal appears to doubt me."

You tilt your head, wondering if he'd taken your tease seriously or not. "Uh. Mayor, I wasn't being genuine, you know-"

"Too late!"

Your eyes go wide as Mayor suddenly grins wide. His arms outstretch, wisps of blue and ice cascading from his fingertips and setting the whole arena floor aglow in a brilliant, ice blue hue. You suck in a sharp breath, taking a step back, trying to step off of the cold, ice tiles-

Fire licks at your calves.

You yelp, spinning around- why was it cold???

Then you realize- the Mayor had created a barrier of blue fire, serving as a ring for the arena and effectively trapping you inside. The breath leaves you in a single, shuddering gasp, your fingers tightening on the weapon given to you. A weapon- you're well aware- that will prove to be useless against a demon like Mayor.

Instantly, you realize your mistake, for a moment disregarding your guaranteed safety over the blind notion that you're in danger. You know he'd never truly hurt you but in the midst of all this?? Yeah. You freak out.

"Shit- Mayor, I take it back!" You call out, spinning around-

Only to find the bone demon a mere few feet from your trembling form.

He smiles, tilts his head. "Giving up already? Now that's hardly a warrior's downfall, (Y/N) . . . Go on, give me a good fight," Mayor purrs, before letting out a delighted, unhinged giggle, and lunges.

And boy, does he lunge.

A scream bubbles in your throat, yet you manage to cut yourself off and stumble to the side as Mayor darts forward, hands clasped behind his back. He manages to keep his offense to his feet alone, the thick, black boots kicking out in a series of martial arts moves that shatters your defenses like glass.

You do your best, of course. With each lash of his foot aimed to knock the air out of you or edge you closer to the wall of blue fire, you parry his attacks with your spear.

One- two- three hits, before he strikes a fourth time, harder than the last.

Your weapon splinters right down the middle.

Mayor lets out a mad chuckle, the whites of his eyes flashing in the corner of your eye as he suddenly reaches out, arms encasing your smaller frame and pinning you to the floor.

It took you a few seconds before you'd even realized you'd lost.

"Oh. . . . hgnh . . . O-Owww . . ." You groan, tilting your head to one side to watch the ring of fire slowly dissipate. The glowing tiles beneath your smushed face return to its normal ashen brown, and you're suddenly acutely aware of Mayor's knee pressing into your back. "Ow."

Macaque, who'd been watching the whole thing, rushes into the ring the moment a break in the fire forms. It licks at his hair but he shakes it off, coming to stand in front of you two. He looks . . . concerned.

"Oh my god, you killed them."

"I did no such thing!" Mayor protests, almost indignantly. As if he'd lose control and kill somebody on accident. "All the blood on my hands has never been an accident, shadow puppet. Now- help them up, please."

Macaque stiffens, bristling- but eventually grasps your hand the moment Mayor gets off of you. He hauls you to your feet, one hand on your head.

"You alright in there, bud?"

The moment your eyes meet, Macaque gets a face full of your pissed, frustrated, and still somewhat excited expression. "Fuck you, why didn't you warn me the old man kicks ass harder than my favorite music band?"

"Oh, thank god, you're still there." The simian rolls his eyes sarcastically, finding relief in your scathing remark. It just lets him know you're okay.

Mayor grins over your shoulder. "I didn't bruise you too badly, did I?"

"Mm . . . not really. A few here and there," you hum, scanning your body, pretending to be studious about it. "Mostly my pride and honor, but, y'know, when did I have any of that, anyways?"

Both of your friends manage an amused chuckle at your feigned indifference, knowing you're gonna hold a grudge for a day or so.

"My apologies, dear, but- you did challenge me," Mayor purrs.

"I called you old."

"Same thing."

"Macaque calls you old all the time!!"

"Yessss, but- I've beaten him more times than I can count. I decided to extend my mercy~"

[harmonytheme]

Could you explain your drawing process? I'm a new artist and I love your style 💛 I'd love to know how you achieve it

Absolutely! I did a little tutorial for you anon, so have a look below the cut and I’ll walk you through how I did this rough little sketch.

first off, i browse my very cheap set of coloured pencils and choose what i’m feeling for that day. these are two weeks old and it’s very obvious which are my favourites haha. i also look for a reference photo!

I chose a cute little turquoise colour for this, one that doesn’t show up on camera very well, and one which I later found out doesn’t erase very well. my reference is a very cute old pic of omar. i already decided here that i couldn’t be bothered drawing his hand lmao.

so, when it comes to guide lines, I tend not to use them when I’m doing side on profile shots, I’m not sure why, I think I’ve just been drawing so long that I don’t really need them anymore? but for this angle, I will use them, just to ensure I have the proportions correct for the angle and so that things line up right.

my guide lines, like my art lol, are definitely in my style. I wasn’t classically trained, but my mother was an artist, and so I’ve used a mixture of her teachings as well as my own research since then. I usually work out the rough shape of the face, centre line, the rough size and position of the nose, then to measure out the distance between eyes and eyebrows. this can all be messy, and as long as you’re using something erasable, you have plenty of freedom to change as you go.

here I am next working out the jaw shape and defining the nose. as you can see with the mouth, it lines up better with the centre of the nose than the guideline I’ve set out, and that’s fine. it looks better that way.

erasing guidelines, defining features.

now here i am adding my daisy-ism’s in. these are the highlights/lowlights I add to almost every picture, even if the refefence does not have it. shadowing under the nose and mouth, a highlight in the brow, the tip of the nose and the chin.

hair time! as you can see, in my reference, he doesn’t have a visible bun, but I think it looks way cuter and more complete this way. I’m just doing a basic hair outline here, working out the shapes and flow, then putting in his lil sunglasses.

shading time! my shading is pretty stylised, but the gist of it is, looking at the reference photo, laying in some cross hatching for the heaviest areas, and making sure the highlights are left unshaded. I use my coloured pencils for shadow AND warmth, which is why I like to have heavily shaded noses and chins in my art. 😌 this also extends to knuckles, fingertips and ears. also shoulders, elbows and knees if those are exposed.

then I shade the hair and add in my final details. so, my little lower eyelashes that I always do, my signature and whatever else I want to add. in this I just gave him a lil heart earring and coloured his sunglasses pink for this.

when it comes to hair, my advice is for you to fake it ‘til you make it. hair is hard, really hard, but my best tips are to section it out and shade each section individually. pay attention to your reference photo and where the highlights and lowlights lay. you don’t need to draw every strand! the inference of hair is always more effective than every single strand drawn out one by one. also, its okay if the final result doesn’t look exactly like the reference. mine never do either! it’s impossible to get everything right, but the important part is having fun and enjoying the process.

and here is the final result! i limited my time on this one as i’m super busy today - usually i would refine it a lot more and spend a tonne of time making sure the shading is smooth, but you get the point, and that’s the important thing. i hope that helps, and if you have any questions, please feel free to send me an ask, or dm me any time! i’d love to help you on your art journey. ♥

[sailorhyunjinz]

~ 𝐁𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐓𝐞𝐚 ~

𝙲𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝; SMUT!!! a smidge of angst and a lil fluff, felix x fem!reader. enemies to fwb, bullying!!!, highschool!au, blowjob, pierced!felix, mentions of complicated family relationships/bad economy, felix being rude lmao, PIV, unprotected sex (use protections ffs, this is a bad example), orgasm (m/f), cum, nicknames, shy reader, fingering. 

𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝; 6.6 k 

𝙽𝚘𝚝𝚎; Consent is like tea or my personal favorite,,, tea slut HSAHSHA PLEASE im- anyways enjoy both tea and consent, both very very sexy and good for you

also,,, my first kinda long fic?? 

𝘚𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺; Lee Felix. The class bully. Also the son of a wealthy business man. You didn’t have the same privileges, living alone at such a young age. After an arrangement Felix invites you to work at his fathers old tea shop but this relationship turns into something unexpected.

The cold wind blew on your exposed calfs, the skirt of the school uniform fluttering as your backpack was lazily thrown across your shoulder, your head turned to the direction the bus comes from. You were not the only one on that bus stop. Other students standing at least a feet apart from each other, all eagerly waiting to hurry back to their comfortable homes, eat dinner and start on their assignments.

You on the other hand had other plans. 

What was on your computer screen wasn’t the typical essay or sheet of physics questions. It was job applications. And lots of them.

A notification arrived, your phone vibrating in your coat pocket and as the screen lit up you saw a message. 

[ Rent due today y/n, have it in by 8 ]

Living by yourself in a dusty apartment that contained nothing more than a bed, a desk and a tiny kitchen overfilled with noodle packets was nothing to be proud of. You could barely afford that type of lifestyle since you were a student so how on earth were you gonna get rent in to the old lady that served as your landlord? 

You sighed, the packed bus rolling slowly on the way and stopping, there barely being place to stand in the crowded vehicle. 

Your apartment was right above an old tea shop, the owner being a wealthy man that owned several shops on the block. His busy lifestyle including buying and selling properties kept him away from his true passion in life; tea. What scared you was his resemblance to a person you knew. A person you knew too well. 

Lee Felix

His only purpose in life was to have fun. To ruin others. And he had every opporunity to do so. His report card was nothing but lies and money, his fathers wealth being able to buy him decent grades without lifting a finger. There was one, only one, instance where the young boy would try his best and that’s when intimidating others. His best skill. Those piercing dark eyes and knife-sharp jaw could leave anyone shaken for days. 

But do you know who his favorite person to bully was?

You. 

All the hurtful memories eventually started to merge together but one stood out clearly to you. It happened a year ago. You walked into the sunlit classroom, your other classmates sitting around their desks, chatting and showing each other photos, laughing happily. Friends was not something you had, more like acquaintance. The students you would greet and exchange a couple of words with but nothing more. Your assigned seat was in the third row, the one sitting right behind you being Felix himself. With a quick glance at the clock you looked underneath your desk, searching for the book you needed for english class, your eyebrows furrowing as you searched desperatly, turning every book over and ripping open your backpack, did you forget it at home?

“Looking for this?”

The cold voice sent a shiver down your spine, you slowly turning back, afraid of what evil gaze awaited you. You gulped as you saw his angular facial structure, his cheekbones pertruding as he held your english book in his hand, the arms of the white school uniform shirt being rolled up just enough to show off his blinged out watch, veins softly trailing upwards on his flexed arms. 

You nodded to which Felix scoffed. Sighing you stood up, standing at the side of his desk and all of a sudden throwing yourself over it in a quest of snatching it from his grasp but failing epically, you falling down onto the floor, scraping your knees on the rough wooden flooring of the classroom. You try to stand up but was quickly stopped by Felix grabbing your face with his other hand, his wrists decked out with multiple delicate chains, all jingling with his movements. 

Meeting his gaze made your skin crawl, his eyes almost animalistic as he looked deep into your innocent doe-eyes, smirking. His blonde hair falling on each side of his face, framing it like a renaissance painting since his stoic features was art in itself. Your eyes lingered a bit too long on Felix’s making the boy annoyed, before you knew it a clear liquid was spilling down your cheek, that not being tears but instead Felix’s spit. You flinch back as he waves the book infront of your face, tears jerking in the corner of your glossy eyes due to the humiliation, your other classmates forming a circle around the two of you, unable to do anything since that could mean the end of them. 

“You want this, you want it so bad? What’s that angel? You’re gonna cry?”

He crouches as your gaze lowers to the floor, hair hanging infront of your face as a shield from his degrading words as the tears started pouring out of you like water, mixing with Felix’s saliva. He laughs psychotically, the cold laughter echoing in the classroom, tiny specs of dusty floating around like bubbles in a fizzy drink. The bold boy puts down the book on the floor behind him before he raises his hand, you shutting your eyes tightly, expecting the worst but being surprised as his hand laces in your disheveled locks. He pushes a strand of hair behind your flushed ear, leaning in close enough for you to feel his breath hit the shell of your ear. 

“I’m gonna give it to you,,, but I want something in return”

You snap your head up to look at him, your eyes wide open, eyebrows hightened. 

“W-what do you want?” you say, only for him to hear.

Felix hums, running his tongue in the inside on his cheek before speaking in a low voice.

“You”

You choked on your own spit, coughing as you turned away from him. You could hear his laugh ringing in your ears and after your coughing fit you turned back hastily, eyes as big as saucers. This couldn’t be true, this couldn’t be what you though it was. In sheer panic you once again tried to snatch the book, crawling on the floor like a bug in order to snake around his back to have a chance to grab the corner of plastic outside of the textbook but being met with disappointment when Felix slammed his foot on it, you retracting your hand after being mere inches away from his shoe. The boy tsked. 

“I expect you at the school gate by the end of the day and if you don’t show up you’re gonna pay for it, understood angel?”

You nod, just nod. No words or mimicks. Simply a nod. His intimidation wiping the entire alphabet from your mind. 

He stands up, grabbing the book and throwing it at you before exiting the classroom, a evil smirk plastered on his face. The sharp gazes of other students around you made you want to escape but you couldn’t, class was starting in 2 minutes. 

♡ 

The sun shone it’s rays on your face, students exiting through the wide white metal gates. You ran your hand through your hair, pulling the straps of your backpack impatiently at you looked left to right, seeing the flowers blossom out in the rather windy weather. Suddenly your wrist was grabbed by a hand wider than yours.

It was Felix.

His closeness made you gulp loudly, a lump nestling into your stomach as you felt your anxiety rise, scared of what he might do to you even if you did find him strangely attractive even though he was a complete asshole. But who didn’t? The entire school was ready to give up their life in order to even be this close to the boy, girls and boys alike. You shook your head, wanting to get rid of the silly thoughts that clouded your mind. Only after minutes did you realise that your legs moved on their own, you being dragged by Felix, his hand still on your wrist. 

“W-where are we going?” you inquired, the wind blowing on the blonde pierced boy, his angelic hair bouncing with every step. 

“Don’t worry about it” he said, not speaking a single more word during the entire time he held your wrist and walked with you in the spring weather. 

All of a sudden the two of you were standing infront of the tea shop, you lifting your head to glance upwards at your dusty window that was right above the tiny wooden sign that said “Tea Shop”, swinging rustily back and forward. Felix retrieves a key, unlocking the corrodated wooden door, the color matching the sign above. 

“Wh- how do you know-” 

Felix hushes you, closing the door behind you before throwing the keys on the counter. 

“I don’t care about what you have to say. My father owns this place and I usually hang around here whenever it’s closed.” 

“Do you work here?” you asked with a voice filled with curiosity. 

Felix starts laughing his signature laugh, it being laced with nothing but iniquity. 

“Work? Do you think I need to work? I’m the only child of a wealthy family, I’m pretty much settled for life”

You nervously look down at the floor, only being in the tea shop a couple of times before it was closed for business.

“Well,,, I know that your father owns this place, I live in the apartment just above so-”

You were quickly cut of by Felix slamming his hand on the table, standing behind the checkout counter and leaning over it with his two arms as pedestals. 

“Why?”

You looked at him confused before your eyes gazed across the wall of glas cabinets displaying their finest china. Teapots with squiggly handles, painted with the utmost attention to detail, the colors of the scenes painted contrasting nicely with the eggshell white background. Small lamps were installed above each teapot, illuminating the work of art even more. 

“Why what?” you said back, still in trance from the beauty of the teapots.

“Why do you live alone?” His eyebrows raised.

“I never said that!” 

“y/n, that apartment is barely enough for a fucking mouse, there’s no way you could live there with someone else”

Damn, how did he know that? You had no other choice but to nod timidly, curling your hand into a fist.

“Don’t have the best relationship with my parents and since they aren’t wealthy like yours I have to do my best to find a way to support myself” you spat out at him, annoyed at his many questions. 

“Touché” Felix said shortly, shrugging his shoulders.

After a long moment of silence the blonde boy spoke again;

“Let’s make a deal, I’ll get you a job here and I’ll join you but only because you’re stupid and need my help, not because I want to be here”

Your eyes light up, like an excited child you dash toward the counter and place your hands near Felix’s, looking at him with twinkling eyes. 

“Really? You would do that?”

Felix nods.

“But don’t get too excited, you haven’t paid your end of the deal yet”

“Tell me! I’ll do anything, I promise!” you says quickly, smiling widely at Felix’s deadpan face.

“Suck me off”

Your previously bright smile faded in a matter of seconds, now turning into pure confusion. 

“Wh-what? I can’t do that! Are you crazy?!”

Felix scoffs, walking towards the door in a cocky manner with his black backpack over his shoulder, wearing black ripped jeans that were strictly banned in school but no longer warned to Felix by the teachers. The schools logo embroidered on the white flowy shirt that was unbuttoned, exposing his brand name t-shirt. 

Just in time you managed to block the door, his lips inches from yours as he sighed, smirking down at you. 

“I’ll do it! I will do it!” 

You blurted out, you had no other choice but to do it. Seeking other jobs had been impossible since you were only a student without any work experience, not having many other skills other than procrastinating and sleeping. You needed this in order to survive. You needed him. 

The boy pushed you against the entrance door, placing his forehead against yours. 

“Of course you will” Felix whispered in a voice deeper than the ocean, causing you to helplessly gulp and drop down on your knees, them hitting the floor with a thump. His small but veiny hands reached for his belt, unbuckling it in a swift motion, metal hitting each other. You were lost deep in thoughts, simply staring at his crotch whilst rethinking your every life decision. Wondering how on earth you got to this point, soon having your mouth stuffed with your bully’s dick. 

Thank god that he was at least hot. 

Felix popped his dick over the band of his underwear and as if you hadn’t had enough surprises today one last one awaited you. A silver metal barbell lodged right beneath his pretty red tip, his dick already hard as he gave it a couple of pumps. Your mouth fell agape, cheeks heating up as you struggled to keep a straight face. Felix being the tease he is had to comment;

“What? Bigger than you thought?”

You scoffed from his boldness, not believing your ears. 

“N-no! Get over yourself you ass”

“Enough talking princess” Felix said in a deep voice, rubbing the tip of his leaking cock on your plushy lips, them being coated with a layer of saliva from you repeatedly lickning them out of nervousness. 

There was a moment of awkwardness, you not being sure where to place your hands before you grabbed the base of his girthy dick, pursing your lips and latching them onto the tip, sinking down gradually in order to not choke immedietly, not wanting to embarrass yourself even more than you already had. 

Felix let out a strained groan at the sensation, you feeling the cold metal as you flattened your tongue, licking a fat strap on the underside of his cock earning yet another groan. The blonde laced his fingers in your hair, tugging on it slightly in order to control the sinful sounds dripping out of his mouth. You whimpered against his dick, there barely being any room to breath as your nose was hovering just above his abdomen, impressed by your own gag reflex but that didn’t last long, Felix now shoving your head down his length, making you choke. 

“Wow, is there anything you can do right? Can’t even suck me off properly”

You can only hum in response, sending shivers down Felix’s spine from the vibrations, the boy feeling the knot in his stomach tightening. The hair flies in front of you face as you bob your head down his cock that was equally as veiny as his decked out arms, feeling the metal hitting your bottom teeth a couple of times. Tears teased the corners of your eyes as you were throat deep on Felix’s member, your hands slightly sweaty from the butterflies in your stomach. Eventually Felix started to weaken in your grasp, small grunts escaping him as you hollowed your cheeks, mascara staining your heated cheeks. 

“f-fuck,,,yes just like that,,ah-”

Luckily for the both of you the shop was located in a rather desolate area of town therefore no bypassers saw the scandalous view through the door that was decorated with a small foggged window. But did Felix care? Not really, the boy was bold enough to get sucked off in public if the opportunity presented itself. 

You looked up at him with the most innocent eyes you could muster, spit starting to dribble down your chin and landing on your skirt, forming slightly saturated patches on the fabric from the wetness. The blonde boys useless comments didn’t make it any easier to withstand this agonizing process. 

“Ah,,, never thought I would be seeing you like this, thought I had degraded you enough but this is just another level of humiliation, isn’t it y/n?”

The hand that was previously tangled in your hair was now moved to your stained cheek, him carefully swiping his thumb across the warm skin but you furrowed your eyebrows, swatting his hand away causing him to scoff before being interupted by his own loud moan, you pulling off and kitten licking his tip, coaxing his impending orgasm. 

It didn’t take long before the boy was shutting his eyes tightly, his jaw slacking as a last low vibrational growl ringed in your ears, his eyes still piercing yours while the thick white liquid spilled out of him, coating the metal bar and seeped into your mouth, your dry lips now getting a coat of clear gloss, the rest dripping down onto the floor and your dark colored skirt. 

You shook your head as you looked around the shop, not wanting to spit out his salty seed right on the floor but Felix simply shook his head back at you, grabbing your face gently. 

“Swallow”

Goosebumps erupted on your skin from his intimidating voice, as if you’d been cast under a spell you nod, swallowing the droplets of cum harshly, the sound of your loud gulp causing Felix to hum and with a smile, ruffle your hair before zipping himself up and running a hand through his own hair, exposing his forehead for just a bit. You stand up on your own, legs wobbling as you don’t even expect the rude boy to help. 

“You start tomorrow after school, my father will only be happy to know that someone actually want’s to work in this shithole. I’ll join you but once again, not because I want to but because your stupid head will mess everything up.”

You nod, only now noticing how scruffy the rest of the teashop looked, moving boxes piling up like the dust in the windowsills. You jerked your head to the side, eyes wandering all over the place, everywhere from the wittering plants to the miscellaneous stacks of files. 

The both of you step out of the dusty shop, the cool air hitting your cheek, now remembering the makeup that was running down it. Without saying a word Felix tries to escape but you stop him, putting a hand on his shoulder. He doesn’t turn around, staring at the road ahead of him. 

“Thank you”

You whisper out, your hair fluttering in the wind, feeling yourself getting emotional from his seemingly sweet gesture. Felix starts walking, the sound of his footsteps getting fainter as the disappears down the sunny asphalt road, leaving you standing infront of the shop before you go behind the shop, entering your burrow of an apartment.

♡ 

You walk to the teashop in the floral spring weather, wondering where Felix had been all day since he wasn’t in school this wednesday where lectures went in half speed. Arriving at the shop everything was surprisingly closed. You peeked into the window, standing on your toes as if that would improve your vision but gave up quickly after, only seeing the scene from yesterday, the same old piles of rubbish. 

A light tap threw you off guard, you yelping and jerking away before noticing the blonde hair, Felix greeting you with a jingle of keys in his hand.

“Wanna have the honors? I mean, it is your first day after all” 

You respond with a small “yes” before grabbing the keys from his hand and unlocking the entrance to the stuffy teashop, coughing as you step in from the dust that twirled all around the two of you. You walked over to the sad plants that were placed haphazardly in the windowsill, swiping your finger over the leafs and closely examining the dust that rubbed off, blowing it away softly before turning to Felix that was nearing the pile of random files. 

“Looks like we have a bunch of work to do before we can actually brew tea” 

He didn’t smile, visibly annoyed. Felix went into the back, behind the beaded curtain he retrieved a bucket of cleaning supplies. 

“You mop the floors, I’ll clean some of the heavy stuff away” 

Felix said, his voice still in that notorious deep tone. 

“Not fair? There’s not even a mop which means I’ll have to do it by hand?” 

Felix scoffed, throwing a old rag at you before turning around and grabbing a moving box filled with god knows what. You sigh, grabbing the bucket and emptying the contents, the brushes and strangly colored bottles of cleaning solution spreading across the counter before you went behind the beaded curtain, being met by a murky kitchen that hadn’t been cleaned in what seemed like forever. You sighed, looking around and opening cabinets only to be met with half broken porcelain and cobwebs, the shelf at the top displaying a multitude of metal cans filled with loose tea that had probably gone tasteless. With a disgusted face you close the cabinet, instead filling up the bucket with water and adding dishsoap in lack of other cleaning substance. 

Hours ticked by, Felix sighing and huffing out of annoyance when carrying out and sorting through countless boxes while you cleaned the floor and dusted every corner, the shop transforming right before your eyes. The two of you eventually ended up in the kitchen, you observing every cup for cracks and disposing of those that showed just that as Felix was washing those that you thought looked presentable. Felix tried his best to not drop the cups despite his slippery fingers in a pathetic attempt at trying to do the dishes, it was clear that he had never in his life had to do this which made you roll your eyes, thinking about the boiling anger you had at this pompous and spoiled boy. 

“Do you like living alone y/n? ” 

The question was rather unexpected, making you choke on your own saliva. Never in your life had you thought that he cared about you. You shrugged your shoulders, wanting to appear unbothered.

“y-yeah, I wanted to be more responsible, I mean we are adults soon and nothing is served on a silver platter but I wouldn’t expect you to know.”

Felix smirked, seeing right through your lie but choosing to not taunt you. You felt vulnerable from the question but instead of continuing the awkward silence you wanted to get to know him better, maybe he wasn’t such a dick after all, maybe his tough guy personality was only a facade?

“What’s with that piercing?” you said, pointing at his groin with your chin making Felix laugh, getting shy from your question but snapping back to his cold outer self. 

“It was a bet and as you can see I lost” he scoffed before continuing, “wanna see?”

Your eyes widened, cheeks heating up before stammering out;

“N-no, Felix you’re disgusting!” you say in desperation for an answer but Felix only laughs even more, almost annoying you. 

“Well it wasn’t so disgusting when you were sucking me off, have you forgotten babygirl? Maybe I should teach you your place again.”

You gulped, not answering but instead just staring at him, a cup frozen in your hand as Felix locks his eyes with your, tilting his head in a cocky manner. You harshly place the cup down, storming out into the area where racks upon racks displayed the many tea sorts that were stashed away somewhere in the shop, Felix retrieving them earlier in the day. You start sorting through them, seeing a paper with orders on a clipboard and deciding to check the different kinds. Everything from oolong to pu’er to herbal was lined up in both teabags or loose tea leafs and surprisingly Felix did a good job, everything displayed in pretty and uniform lines. Before you could put a dash for a variety of tea that was missing. Felix sticks his head in between the beaded strings of the curtain, his eyes twinkling. 

“Want some tea?”

For the first time he seemed cute. Not scary or intimidating, just cute. By the way his blonde locks fell infront of his face to the way his earrings were jingling, fading out to his angular facial structure. 

You nod shyly, placing the clipboard on a random shelf before scooting over to the kitchen, seeing that Felix had placed out a white teapot with cobalt blue details, a floral pattern that contradicted to the eggshell white base. On the counter stood a small brown paperbag with black tea and right next to it a small tray of white sugarcubes. 

“This seems awfully complicated for making tea” you say, looking at the red kettle boiling on the stove, there not being an electric kettle in this old establishment. 

“What you expect? That I’ll be satisfied with you serving some watered down tea from a teabag? There’s a process you know.”

“Wow, and this is coming from Lee Felix? The son of a rich man and also the schools scumbag?”

Felix snaps his towards you, previously looking at the piping hot kettle. He licked the inside of his cheek, exhaling sharply through his nose, turning his cheek towards his shoulder, a momentary pop being heard before he looked at you with his dark eyes.

“I’m being nice, take that to your advantage and I’ll break your kneecaps”

You nodded and he smiled, astonished by the duality of this man. 

“Are you just gonna stand there? Come closer”

You stepped closer to the counter, your breath hitching when you felt Felix’s chest again your back, his hands leaning against the counter and trapping you between the two. You swallowed harshly, eyes darting over the various equipment needed to make a simple cup of tea. 

“Open the tea pot maybe?”

Felix said, sighing. You feeling his warm breath against the outer shell of your ear, his voice sounding even more dangerous when it was right beside you. You grabbed the blue detailed teapot and opened it, only to see a metal strainer already a part of the pot. Doubtfully you grabbed the little packet of loose leaf tea, removing and placing down the clip that was hindering it’s aroma from escaping the luxurious leafs. The fragrence of the tea hit your senses, the smell almost addictive. 

“What tea is this?” 

You said, turning the bag in you hand, looking for any type of lettering that would bring you closer to an answer.

“Russian earl grey. It contains bergamot orange making it more pungent”

You hummed, being to scared to turn around and face him, you now zoning out whilst your eyes were stuck on the awfully colored tiles on the kitchen wall. 

“You’re supposed to drink it y/n, not smell it”

Felix stated causing you to snap out and notice that you’ve been holding the bag to your nose, scrunching your nose ever so often. 

“Oh yeah,,, right,,, sorry. How much should I put in?”

You say, tilting the bag and slowly watching dark colored particles spill into the metal strainer. Felix slowly put his hand on yours, tilting the bag even more. You could feel your heart in your throat, your hands starting to sweat from his close proximity. His hand was warm for such a cold person. 

“It’s supposed to fill up one third of the strainer, remember that”

You mewled out a quiet “yes” as he put the bag down, removing his hand from yours. The next step was obvious, filling up the tea pot with hot water. Just as you were about to grab the black handle of the shiny red kettle Felix smacked your hand away, him grabbing it instead.

“It’s hot and I can’t trust someone as stupid as you with it”

“I can grab a kettle you know? I’m not that weak-”

“Shut it”

You pressed your lips shut as Felix pressed himself against your back, carefully reaching and pouring in the steaming water and seeing the water droplets diffuse up into the atmosphere. He carefully put the lid back on the pot and backed away as he put the kettle back on the stove, turning it off. 

“What do we do now?” 

You asked, turning around and leaning your butt against the cold counter.

“We wait for 5 minutes, the steeping time is different for different teas, you’ll have to learn them when working here.”

You nod attentively, staring down at your shoes and turning your heels against the dark wooden floorboards. 

“I wanna change the deal y/n”

Your head shot up to the blonde boy, him standing close by in all his glory, not wearing his school uniform but instead a black t-shirt, of course having a obnoxiously loud designer logo in the front just like the belt that was resting on top of his black slacks. His bracelets jingled everytime he moved his hands, this time wearing dainty silver rings to match with his wristwatch and shining piercings. 

“W-what why? Are you gonna fire me?”

Blood was boiling in your veins, not knowing his intentions yet but knowing that they were just as sinister as the boy himself. Before you knew it his lips were attached on yours.

Your heart skipped a beat, knuckles whitening as you held onto the counter from sheer panic. His lips were softer than expected, pressing gently as he tilted his head, his eyelashes feathering over his closed lids. His hands traveled up your clothed body, exploring every inch of you. The soft sound of lips smacking against each other ignited a feeling deep in your core. You were pushed closer to the edge of the counter, his body so close, leaving you with no choice but to jump up on the metal surface. The coldness radiated through the thin fabric of your pleated skirt, hitting your aching cunt that was already dripping from Felix’s simple actions, his daunting aura clouding your mind with sinful thoughts. 

“I’ll raise your pay if you fuck me, please y/n”

He whispers against your plush lips. You hummed, hesitating before slowly nodding, not being able to think clear with your heart beating like it’s about to protrude from your chest. He smiles slyly before reattaching his lips onto yours, his wet and sharp tongue running over your swollen bottom lip, desperatly wanting to taste your tongue. Your lips parted as you moaned into the kiss, giving him the perfect opportunity to pry himself into your mouth, the kiss getting sloppier, Felix growing needier as the seconds on the large clock on top of the door frame ticked. The blonde boy placed himself inbetween your legs, his veiny hands placed on your knees, seperating your already shivering legs. Without knowing what you were doing you cupped Felix’s cheeks, feeling the sharpness of his jaw against your soft hands.

Why did you pull him closer? He’d hurt you so bad in the past, everyday was living hell because of him and his deeds. A lightheadedness hit you as memories scrolled past your consciousness. Memories still painful, tender as open wounds. But for him you could forgive anything. Forget, just to see him smile at you.

His cologne was strangely addictive, the musky smell mixed with the scent of his soft sunkissed skin. You moaned softly against his lips as his fingers traced lightly over your exposed panties, the skirt already folded up your thighs. He hummed in delight, feeling the soaked fabric sticking against your pulsating cunt. 

“I’ve waited for this for so long y/n”

You looked at him with confusion in your glossy eyes. Waited, for you?

Within a matter of seconds his fingers pushed aside the wet patch of fabric shielding you from the cold air, only to insert a finger inside of your desperate hole causing you to gasp. A second finger joined close by and Felix groaned, feeling your tight walls around his glistening digits. You had so many questions but not enough power to say them without stuttering.

“W-waited for,,, m-me?”

His fingers curled upwards as you finished your sentence causing you to grip his wrist, the squelching sound of your pussy pleasing the blonde boy as he pumped his fingers into you relentlessly.

“That’s how I get attention. You aren’t impressed by materialistic things so I did what I had to”

You couldn’t believe your ears. All that to get your attention? He succeeded but he would never understand the emotions you went through because of him. The hatered you thought would never melt away suddenly did, you becoming nothing more but a whimpering mess from his touch. 

A thump was heard from your head hitting the cupboard, the pleasure firing through your body as your small cries echoed throughout the small kitchen. A sudden feeling of emptiness caused you to sigh in both relief and frustration. Your previously shut eyes slowly drifted open, panicked when you see Felix unbuckling his belt, letting both the fabric of his pants and underwear fall to the dim floor. 

Somehow his leaking cock looked prettier this time around, the shiny piercing distracting to the eye. Your mouth watered embarrassingly enough, turning your gaze to the ticking clock until Felix cleared his throat, his adams apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed his spit. He looked nervous which was unfamilliar, the boy always being persistant with his cocky mannerisms. Felix pulled you closer to the edge of the counter, your face heating up as your legs were spread wide open for him. There was nowhere you could hide your flushed face and Felix took this to his advantage.

“Huh? Shy, babygirl?” 

You gulped as you watched him stroke himself, the crimson colored tip disappearing only to reappear seconds later. Your eyes shut tightly as he moved the slick-stained panties to the side, anticipating to be filled to the brim from his impressive size. Mouth agape, Felix pushed into your wet hole, your hands gripping his broad shoulder in order to hinder a loud moan. 

“fuck y/n,,, you’re so tight, s-shit”

You couldn’t answer, still adjusting your velvety walls around him. As the pain subsided your core ached for friction, needing to feel him deep inside of you. Your arms wrapped around the boy, pulling him closer to your heated body making him smirk slyly before carefully pulling away, only his tip resting inside of you. Just as you were about to sigh due to emptiness he slammed inside of you, your entire body shaking from the impact. Panting, you begged for more, begging for him to go faster.

“F-felix! faster,,, please”

Your warm face was buried deep in his shoulder, his slightly cold hands gripping your hips tightly, starting to roll against your throbbing cunt earning small mewls from between your swollen lips. The counter creaked with each thrust that grew louder as his pace got faster, feeling your delicate walls clench around his veiny length, his silver earrings dangling from his lobes. Felix explored parts of your body even you hadn’t felt, his dick prodding you deep enough to make your eyes roll back into your skull, biting down on his shirt. 

The sound of skin slapping echoed in the room, your weakening legs wrapping around his figure, trapping him inside of you but the blonde boy had no plans of stopping. Sweat beaded around his temples, his previously serious expressing turning into a grin as he adored your moans, words falling out in incomprehensible syllables. You were close and so was Felix. 

The pit of fire grew violent deep in your core, holding the young boy tighter to your body, clawing his clothed back. Every thrust had it’s impact, shaking you up and forcing shameless moans out from your throat that were being muffled by the fabric between your lips. The two of you moaned in unison, Felix’s deep mutters getting louder, his vicious thrusts becoming sloppier and uneven, desperate for his sweet release. You clenched around him involuntarily, trying to hold back from screaming, glad that your warm face was between his shoulder and neck so that he couldn’t see your fucked out expression. His name rolled off your tongue like a mantra, mind blank as your eyes were squeezed shut.

“Felix, i-im gonna c-cum! im-m cumming!”

The wall seperating you from your orgasm collapsed, leaving you with a powerful sensation washing over you. Your legs shook, struggling to keep your legs wrapped around him but soon enough you wouldn’t have to. Felix thrusted into you one final time, sending a shiver down your spine and overstimulating you before pulling out, his dick glistening with your erotic juices as he fucked his hand, hot spurts of cum leaking out. He growled, scrunching his forehead as he released on your shaking thighs, one last droplet of cum descending down his shaft and coating the shiny piercing that decorated his pretty cock. 

You panted, still processing what just happened, looking at Felix that unwrapped his hand from around his member, dick turning flaccid. You lifted yourself off the counter, only then realising how weak your legs were, not letting go of the surface you just fucked on. 

“Is this a one time thing or,,,” 

You start, not really knowing what to say afterwards. Felix cleared his throat, putting on his pants as you fixed your dark skirt, back against the boy.

“Let’s be friends”

You turned around, gazing at Felix as he looked down at the grimy floor.

“I’ll stop,,, bothering you, now we’re friends,,, with benefits but it’s a secret, understand?”

Every sentence this man spoke sounded serious with his deep voice but this was serious, for real. 

“Why should I? Why should I agree, Felix? So that you can play around with me even more, make me your little shy puppet? I’m not having it!!”

You yelled at the boy, his expression deadpan as you hit him in the abdomen, instantly regretting it as your knuckles hit his rock hard abs. Frustration clouded your mind, wanting to break every single piece of porcelain in the narrow kitchen. Instead you broke yourself apart. Crying in front of Felix like you’d done so many times before, dropping to the floor and feeling the cold material against your bare thigh. This feeling, so familiar. Felix gazing down on you like you we’re worth nothing more than the ground. 

Only this time he didn’t only stand and stare. 

His arms wrapped around your quivering figure, his embrace warmer than his face. 

“I’m sorry, y/n”

His voice shook as the silence overtook the both of you, the quiet ticking of the clock interupting. 

“Hm? Look at me, y/n”

Felix pulled away from you, sitting on the floor next to you, watching your head hang low as he gently put a hand on your jaw, lifting your gaze up to meet his. 

“I’m fucking stupid, I know. I shouldn’t have hurt you like that but,,, I didn’t know how- how to get closer to you.”

He swiped the rough pad of his thumb across your cheek, wiping your tears. 

“I will never hurt you ever again, y/n. We- we can work here and just,,, do stuff.”

You knew exactly what he meant by “stuff” but somehow you trusted him. You trusted him because you had no one else to trust. 

“But one rule” he said.

You tilted your head, wondering what his rule was.

“No falling in love”

You hummed, nodding as you wiped your tearstained cheeks with the sleeves of your shirt, cracking a smile at your own vulnerability. Felix stood up and you looked up at him, feeling small but not afraid. 

“So what do you say, y/n?”

He offered you his hand, you couldn’t stop looking into his secretive eyes that slowly turned mellow. 

You grabbed his hand, passing it as a yes to his question. 

But the both of you knew that the rule would be broken soon, like the brittle edge of a teacup. 

[arhvste]

KUROO TETSURO - 3:37AM

summary - you and kuroo play hide and seek in the early hours of morning after the hot nights of mid august prevent you both from falling asleep - fluff

this was actually a prompt written by @emma_ichihara on tiktok that i absolutely needed to write about after i saw it so thank u for that queen <3

warnings - none

-

The heat in your bedroom was unbearable. Then again, you couldn’t say you didn’t expect it to be as mid august is always going to be a pain to sleep through.

You tossed about in your sheets flailing your arms and legs about trying to get some sort of breeze across your limbs only to flop down in frustration. Grabbing your phone from the side of your bed you checked the time. 2:27AM.

Your eyes squinted at the brightness of the screen and you put your phone back down only to hear it vibrate on the surface as soon as you let go of the device. Assuming it was going to be a random notification from one of your apps you almost decided to ignore it but something told you to check regardless.

Your eyes once again squinting as they adjusted to the luminous light emitting from your phone contrasting against the darkness of your room. Your heart fluttered as you read through the notification.

2:28AM - tetsoup : i know ur up right now

You unlocked your phone as you typed out your reply. A conversation flowing between the two of you.

2:28AM - thot chan : okay u got me sue me for not being able to handle the heat

2:29AM - tetsoup : would’ve thought after being around me so much you’d be able to handle the hot ;)

2:29AM - thot chan : ur a chemistry nerd u aren't hot

2:29AM - tetsoup : fail ur next chemistry exam for all i care dont ask me for help :(

2:30AM - thot chan : you wound me captain

2:30AM - thot chan : and what are u doing up right now?

2:31AM - tetsoup : same as u genius, this heat is making my body perspire more than what i’d like

2:31AM - thot chan : lmao that means u finna be smelly. go take a cold shower u farm animal

2:31AM - tetsoup : at 2am? i don't think so u imbecile, i have a better solution though

2:32AM - thot chan : and that is?

You stared at your phone expecting a reply quickly but after 5 minutes it never came.

‘Idiot must’ve fallen asleep’

You hummed as you set your phone back down and allowed your head to hit back against the soft pillows on your bed. The heat was still bothering you so it didn’t look like you were going to be getting much sleep, regardless you still tried by closing your eyes and trying to force your brain into drifting off into a peaceful slumber.

Not even 4 minutes into your attempt at forced sleep you heard your phone vibrate softly against the wood of your bedside table. Snatching it up towards your face you stared at the notification in disbelief.

2:43AM - tetsoup : im outside ur house hurry up the bugs are eating me alive

This boy.

Swinging your legs off the hurricane of sheets, pillows and your comforter, you dragged yourself over to the window to peek through your blinds. There stood your tall boyfriend with a big hoodie and sweatpants on, signature bedhead with his hands in his pockets patiently waiting for your arrival.

You smiled slightly. He really had your whole heart and you couldn’t deny that even if you tried.

Grabbing one of his hoodies you had ‘borrowed’ you threw on your shoes and quietly made your way to the front door carefully not wanting to disturb your parents and have them question your activities.

“Finally, my body was about to start decomposing from all the bugs attacking me from just standing here.”

“Sounds like a you problem.”

Kuroo pulled your smaller frame into his significantly larger one as you inhaled the scent of his hoodie. He buried his head into the crook of your neck as he gave it a soft kiss before looking back down at you.

“Come on let's go.”

You hummed in curiosity but allowed the boy to take your smaller hand into his larger calloused one and lead the way to the unknown destination.

It wasn’t rare for you and Kuroo to meet up during the night. Sure you spent a lot of time together most days but there was something about being the only ones out in such public places that made you both feel as if you were the only ones in the world. This feeling never got old to the pair of you as everytime the two of you met up in the earliest hours of morning you would find yourselves falling in love all over again with each other. These hours were the ones you held close to your evergrowing heart.

After 5 minutes of walking through the peaceful streets in your neighbourhood, Kuroo led you to the playground the two of you and Kenma would find yourselves occupied most days after school back when you were all younger. The place was such a public and overlooked one, but you all still cherished the memories created there and would sometimes find yourselves reminiscing on those times whenever you’d come back.

You let go of your boyfriend’s hand as you climbed onto the climbing structure which years ago would’ve proven to be more of a challenge for you to reach the top too. The platform a lot smaller than it used to be, you grabbed the railing and allowed a gentle breeze to run through the locks of your hair.

Kuroo looked up at you, adoration twinkling in his eyes. To him you were everything. He had known you ever since he first moved into the neighbourhood with his dad and grandparents. He used to find talking to others a struggle and found Kenma particularly hard to communicate with. You however, took the opportunity to get both boys to open up more to each other right by the reigns and within your first 6 months of being acquainted with each other, you had managed to get both boys comfortable enough to call you and each other a friend in confidence. For that, Kuroo was eternally grateful and even more so when you accepted his romantic feelings towards you 3 years ago.

“Let’s play hide and seek, you know, like we used to.”

You turned smiling to the beheaded captain. He gave you his signature smirk and turned around.

“You’ve got 30 seconds, be prepared to lose immediately.”

You laughed as he began to count up to 30, crouching behind a slide that you thought covered yourself from his view. It actually took Kuroo 54 seconds to find you and you turned the childish game into a small competition between the two of you, tallying up who could find the other the fastest each time.

It got to your 13th round and this time you were hiding inside the slide. Kuroo had yet to find you and it had been 8 minutes already. This confused you slightly as the usually perceptive boy would’ve found you by now. You climbed out of the slide and onto the platform as you glanced around your surroundings seeing no signs of him.

You raised your eyebrow as you knew the boy surely must be messing with you. He would never actually abandon you especially without letting you know.

Cupping your hands to both sides of your mouth you let yourself lean towards the railing of the climbing structure.

“Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo!”

You called out while continuing to scan the area in your view.

What you weren’t expecting was for strong arms to find their way around your waist as you felt someone's hot breath against the skin on your neck.

“I’m right here, my beautiful Juliet.”

You gasped as Kuroo kissed your neck before spinning you around to look at you directly. One of his hands supporting your back and the other moving a piece of loose hair away from your face, he stared into your eyes which twinkled under the stars. You smiled widely at him as he admired your gorgeous face.

He allowed his hand to trail down your neck until he moved his fingers to weave through your hair delicately. Moving his head down, he softly kissed your lips as you melted into his touch. Your hands moved to his broad shoulders as he deepened the kiss making you sigh in satisfaction. You hummed as he drew small circles on your back with his long fingers let your own hands move towards his untamable hair and rake through it resulting in a hum of approval from him.

You both pulled away as you studied each other's expressions. In that moment Kuroo had fallen for you even deeper if that was possible. Every fibre in his being adored you and it took so much self control to not just tackle you off the structure and cuddle you forever. You were his soulmate he was sure of that. The idea of love had never crossed Kuroo’s mind until middle school when you had both grown up a little bit more. He was focused on volleyball and keeping up his grades but you were always at the back of his mind driving him crazy to the point where he felt he had no other choice than to explore these foreign feelings for you. He would argue that by confessing to you, he had made the best decision in his life. You brought nothing but pure light into his life he was convinced you were some sort of guardian angel. You couldn’t be real. You were a living goddess and there were times when he’d feel like you were too good to be true.

The feelings were mutual on your side too. Kuroo Tetsuro had been a challenge for you to get to open up but when he did he didnt hold back on subconsciously taking your heart and occupying your thoughts on the daily. The two of you held such a deep and indescribable love for each other sometimes you felt like it was too hard to contain.

Brought back to reality by your hand caressing his cheek Kuroo turned to you and smiled so genuinely.

“Y/N, I am so so in love with you.”

“I know Tetsu. I love you too. So much.”

You pecked his cheek as he guided you off the climbing structure and onto the soft grass surrounding the playground.

You both laid there in a comfortable silence as you allowed the sounds of distant cars passing through the busy city of tokyo, and the soft sounds of crickets chirping as you cuddled up to Kuroo’s chest.

He wrapped his muscular arms around you and pulled you close to him whispering “I love you” over and over again quietly enough for only you to hear.

The early morning had reached 3AM and you both knew you’d have to make your way back to your homes soon but right now nothing else mattered.

The only thing on your minds was the fact you were both stupidly in love with each other and you would continue to allow yourselves to fall in love over and over again as you stared at the stars whispering small professions of love to one another for the remaining time you spent outside.

Kuroo Tetsuro, a perceptive boy who hadn’t considered love until you came into his life, had never felt such raw emotion in his life and it was these early hour moments which he would hold close to his heart for the rest of his life which he had planned to go through with you by his side.

[calciferous-kelpie]

Breaking Young Artists ft. Kirby

So I woke up today at 8AM (which is highly unlike me) with the extreme urge to write about my shitty experiences as a young creator online. I’ve never really talked about this with anyone before, at least not to the extent that I’m going to now. But yeah. Here we go. Yay.

Today we’re talking about the Kirby fandom, but it’s okay if you don’t know shit about Kirby because we’re actually talking about fandom gatekeeping more than anything.

Most of you probably didn’t know I was into the Kirby franchise at one point, and that’s completely intentional. I’ve put that part of my life far behind me, and let me tell you, I don’t look back on it with much fondness, despite the fact that I was in the fandom for years.

Here’s one of the many reasons why!

This is JP. My Kirby fan character from forbidden days no longer spoken of.

“Wait, so JP? Like… Jigglypuff?”

Yes.

“And this was your Kirby fan character?”

Yes.

“Oh.”

Yes.

My lack of creativity should be apparent to anyone who looks at this character. JP’s creation is lazy and self-indulgent. She is clearly the Pokemon Jigglypuff with some minor redesigns who was then shoved into the Kirby universe for no good reason.

When I first made her, I had no real intention of explaining why she was basically just Jigglypuff, but as I continued to develop her, I began to consider what it would be like to explain her appearance—to create a story where Pokemon and Kirby both existed together on, like, different planets in a vast universe. She was going to be half Jigglypuff and half… whateverthefuck you want to call Kirby’s species.

You can still find art of her buried deep in my DeviantArt gallery (as well as 21 chapters of a story I will never, ever complete), but I don’t talk about her anymore. And this is why.

It all happened back around 2010-2012, which meant I was about 12-14 at the time. This was back when DeviantArt was still the main hub for all artists (lmao) and tumblr was still kind of new on the scene. A cool new trend popping up in fandom spaces at this time was the creation of “your oc is terrible” tumblr blogs, which—as the term implies—existed simply to make fun of artists who had crappy characters. They would reupload artists’ works and laugh at how lame or unoriginal their designs were.

These people were trend-setters, making fun of cringe character designs before “cringe” was even a word used to describe them. And before you fall for the fun hipster wording here: no, this did not make them admirable. They were, in fact, assholes.

Some of these blogs liked to pretend they “poked fun” in the spirit of “constructive criticism” but very few of these people actually offered anything outside of insults. (Besides, even if their feedback had been constructive, none of these artists whose work they’d reuploaded had asked for this and probably should have just been left alone.)

You can probably see where I’m going with all of this. My art of JP was uploaded to a couple of these “crappy oc” blogs, and I was ridiculed for having dared to create a thing.

I discovered my art had been taken from my DeviantArt gallery and uploaded to tumblr (a site I didn’t even have an account on at the time) without my knowledge. My signature had been blocked out (to protect my privacy I guess??? lmfao) and my work had been openly mocked for the enjoyment of an audience. People complained about my shitty character, saying that she was literally just Jigglypuff dressed up to look like an OC. They rolled their eyes at her name and her appearance. And in no uncertain terms, I was deemed a bad artist and a bad member of fandom—a warning to other new artists of what to never be.

I wasn’t told any of this to my face, of course, which I guess was supposed to be a blessing. Rather, I had the lovely privilege of discovering that people were mocking me behind my back for their own satisfaction. It could have even been one of my friends who had brought my work up for mockery. I’ll never know.

But let me tell you, there’s not a lot that’s more discouraging than learning people are ridiculing you just out of earshot.

I wish I had had the foresight to take screenshots of the posts these people made. To document the insults and the way I was treated when I asked them to take my art down from their blog. Unfortunately, I don’t have that. I was young and ashamed and just wanted the experience to be over with. But you know what? The receipts don’t matter, anyway.

I don’t need to prove that I didn’t deserve that treatment.

Today, I acknowledge that my character was lame and kind of uncreative. But that certainly doesn’t mean that the people who made fun of me were in the right. I had never claimed to be a brilliant character creator—some great example of unique OCs and unparalleled storytelling. And hell, even if I had done that, it wouldn’t have given anyone the right to stomp on my imagination the way these people did. I was just a kid.

It’s 2021 now. I’m nearly 23 years old, and it’s been about a decade since this happened to me. I haven’t thought about this horrible event in detail for some time, but I need you to understand that even when I’m not actively thinking about this, my life as an artist is affected by it every day.

I’m still ashamed to share much of anything about my characters. I still worry constantly that I’m being cringey, self-indulgent, or a “bad artist.” Some days I manage to create with beautiful, reckless abandon, but then when the dreaming ends, I look back on what I’ve created and fuss, and worry, and doubt. (Ever wonder why you rarely see my work?)

I know the culture around OCs online has improved in a lot of ways since the 2010’s, but I still want to put this message out there. I want everyone to know why this sort of thing isn’t okay. I want my history to be documented so that maybe some new, excited artist doesn’t have to go through what I did.

TL;DR:

Never make fun of someone for having an uncreative or “cringey” character. It’s crappy to do to any artist of any age, but especially if you do this to a kid of all people—a young artist who is just learning the ropes and learning to be creative. This shit sticks with a person, and it can and will inhibit their ability to create amazing things in the future. If you put down an artist for being bad at design or being cringey, you are an awful person.

And to the people responsible for putting my dumbass little timmy’s-first-OC on tumblr blogs to be sneered at and mocked, I mean this will all my heart:

Fuck you! :)

[dykehaus]

Chromatica first listen reactions

Chromatica 1 - Orchestral opening, very cinematic like she threw a Hans Zimmer wig in the ring here for apparently no reason other than to maybe suggest a video game/scifi movie opening? I’m getting opening credits to a Square Enix game circa 2005 so. I’m good with it.

Alice - MY NAME. ISN’T ALICE. Straight into the dance beats… yes god. Verses may be forgettable and the lyrics/conceit of the song isn’t that interesting but I’m really loving the chorus sound and the modulated voice in the bridge - Judas teas!! Other than the bridge, kinda filler? Remains to be seen on second listen.

Stupid Love - I didn’t love this when it leaked or was officially released. I almost let the dumb video sour the potential of it. Is it the greatest song here? No it’s just as dumb as its video. But it’s actually more enjoyable when you just accept that it’s dumb and don’t try to fight against it. It’s got some crisp BTW B-side sounding production and corniness to it and we can get behind that! After school special pop. Not sorry, I’ll listen to Stupid Love.

Rain on Me - Has gay sex in public while this plays. Someone meanwhile smokes a cigarette in a Brooklyn warehouse and sips a matcha cocktail. Next.

Free Woman - KNOCK OUT in my opinion. Like an upbeat So Happy I Could Die I would argue… Also might be one of the lezzier items on offer here. Which is among my priorities in listening to any Lady Gaga output. You really get the texture of her vocals here and Gaga’s voice is one of her real selling points. There are no girls who make this kind of music that have her intonation. Periodt. I’m a Free Wuhman!

Fun Tonight - Is this the ballad? It’s not a ballad. It’s a dance song. But it has Gypsy from ARTPOP vibes. The Gaga equivalent of a torch song. This is the song you put on when you’re having a little early 00s white girl in a romcom sad montage moment and there’s certainly a time and place for that! This is definitely about Christian and for that reason I wish it were angrier lmao. (Fuck him)

Chromatica II - More moody strings! I definitely get more of a video game feel from this than cinematic necessarily. Feels like an album version of a cut scene.

911 - Heavy bass! Chanting robot voice! Would’ve given myself a wettie through the car speakers with this if I were still driving on the regular. This vocal is of kin with Madonna’s on Madame X. The lyrics here are GARBAGE  but it might get the Heavy Metal Lover treatment where I’ll eventually love every bit of it.

Plastic Doll - This is Barbie Girl but played straight. Right now I don’t love that but given enough to drink I will think it’s transcendent art. She rhymed ‘saga’ and ‘gaga’! Someone will inevitably perform a genderqueer drag act to this.

Sour Candy - I don’t pretend to know actually anything about Kpop. Their presence here gives me unrelenting early 00s vibes. Is that a big reference point for Kpop groups? I have no idea. I think this one might have real commercial value considering the crossover event of it all. The production here is really just. fine. Capable. But I LOVE the Gaga vocal!! My favorite other than Free Woman thus far.

Enigma - She put some effort into the lyrics here! Thanks G! Killer, signature soaring Gaga chorus. The enigma thing is technically self promotion for her never-ending Vegas residency (which costs about a billion to attend). This has 70s disco sparkle to it and it’s really enjoyable.

Replay - (Shawty’s like a replay?). When the electro-hook kicks in here, I just want to get up and dance. This whole section of the album actually after Chromatica II (should we call it Act 2?) feels like it’s trying to ramp the energy back up after a dip. “Your monsters torture me!” Me looking up at my Fame Monster merchandise.

Chromatica III - OK like the cut scene before the final boss! My favorite of the three orchestral songs. Makes sense considering what’s to come in Sine From Above.

Sine From Above - FUCK. For me, the best song on the album on first listen. This has the most “narrative” and “build” as I would say in a reader’s report at work. Elton John actually brings even more gravitas to this. Let’s spell it out kids: W-I-G! Before there was love there was silence!!!

1000 Doves - It’s depressing me a bit how plaintive she is on this album. But somehow this song is still uptempo? Reminds me of the original version of Dope. But like, listenable. Much as we valorize ARTPOP was oddly prescient for its release year, there were legit duds on that album. Dope was one of them.

Babylon - You can serve it to me ancient city style! She said lemme ham it up real quick to finish this ditty off. The Lady Gaga equivalent of Liza Minnelli turns off a lamp. Gossip! Babble on! This is what I’ll put on to get dressed and, nostalgically, it gives me a little of Disco Heaven closing The Fame. This might start up shit with Madonna again like the good old days :)

OVERALL THOUGHTS: This is the most homogenous album she’s released since The Fame. It’s also one of the snappiest, smoothest listens as an album. Sometimes Gaga albums are better taken in bites... One of the upsides: that homogeneity makes it automatically more cohesive than say, Born This Way or even Joanne (cowboy crap aside). Do the complaints that she’s playing it safe hold water? Absolutely and that’s just as I expected. But this is the album she frankly needed to make at this stage. Just as Madonna needed to make Ray of Light when she did. After such massive and unexpected success basically under the guise of ANOTHER character (this one a basic girl in the Ally/SiB character), she needed to ease back into the Gaga machine.

BEST SONGS: Sine From Above, Free Woman, Enigma, Babylon

Anyway, I’m putting Sine From Above on repeat now!! 

EDIT AFTER 24 HOURS: best songs are enigma, 911, babylon, and rain on me. and i stick by really enjoying sine from above in all its 2012 edm hangover in ibiza-ness. alice is really a grower on several listens. fun tonight, 1000 doves, and stupid love round out the bottom for sure. 

[majorshiraharu]

Discussion of Limitations in Live Action & Style Choices

This will be all spoilers for the new episode of the Mandalorian.  I’m putting it under a cut so no one accidentally gets spoiled. Fair warning it is long af, I tried doing a mix of my opinions and information from the show, films, etc. I tried putting the more opinion parts in italic, might have forgotten some parts tho. I spent way too long on this lmao

--------------SPOILERS BELOW------------------

I'm putting my thoughts for each time I watched it. That way, you can see how rewatching changed my mind some. I also had almost a whole day to process the episode before I watched it again, then I had a few hours to think about it and add to this, and then now I've watched it for the third time. This will be a mix of my reactions and opinions and then some information about The Mandalorian and things I think many people are overlooking. Especially in a time when we have major blockbuster films with pretty amazing CGI and people have come to expect that level of detail in everything. If you don’t want to read my reaction/opinion parts, skip down past “3rd Viewing” (the sectioned area)

1st Viewing When It Dropped; Right After Watching: — Okay honestly not the biggest fan of this Ahsoka, I feel like they could have done a bit better with her lekku, montrals, and the contacts because they kinda took me out of it a few times. She didn't move a lot like Ahsoka, but then again she does move and act more like the Rebels version, so if you haven't seen that I can see how this would be more off-putting. She's much older at this point and probably can't move as well as she used to. Also, I know we've come to expect the effects of high-budget films and their fancy CGI, but this show is not that and I think they truly did the best they could with what they had. I'm too tired now, but will write about that stuff in my second viewing section. Overall, I think in the scenes where she interacted with Mando and the child were very well done and felt like how I thought Ahsoka would be after the journey she had over the past years. Those moments felt like Ahsoka to me, and I really enjoyed. 2nd Viewing; About 16 Hours After First Viewing: — So I took some time today to think about last night's episode, I also decided to hop on social media and see what people's reactions were. I was surprised how on Twitter and Reddit I hardly found anyone who disliked this version, longtime fans, new fans, people who didn't know Ahsoka. It seemed like most people really loved it and were extremely happy to see her in live-action. Some people didn't like the way her lekku & montral looked but otherwise enjoyed it, and then there were a few people who said it didn't feel like Ahsoka to them. Now here's my opinion on the second viewing, I liked her more after watching it again. As mentioned above she's definitely more like her Rebels version, and we have a few years when she and Sabine were out searching for Ezra and Thrawn. We don't know what she's been through but clearly, she's much calmer and wiser, which I think fits, it's not like how she was in Clone Wars but it's been like 25+ ish years, so she's had a lot of time to grow and shouldn’t be the same. The actress who played her was pretty stiff and monotone during more scenes than I would have liked, but all her scenes with Din and the Child were excellent, and felt pretty close to Ahsoka, really liked her in those. The action scenes were very cool at the start. Her fighting style was more like her fighting in Rebels. I would have liked a few more shots of her with her signature lightsaber hold, but they included them during the right moments, so that doesn't really bother me that much. Now for the mostly on Tumblr infamous lekku & montral, on second viewing I didn't mind them as much because it wasn't as shocking. The length should have been longer imho, and they definitely needed to change the montral, that's what I have the only real problem with. The montral just looked too short, was angled back quite far, and yeah, just didn't look like any animated version, concepts, or even any cosplays I've seen. This was the only thing about her that I really just didn't like and bothered me some. 3rd Viewing; Most of my opinions stayed the same, I watched it this time with some of my friends who love Star Wars and one who loves Ahsoka as much as me, so I wanted to see their reaction. They all loved her, tho they agreed the length should have been longer and the top should have been different. But they all really loved the episode and her.

--------------------- Now all that said, here are some counterpoints and information because I thought it was important to look into why it might be that way, and I will also include ways that I think it could have been done better. Besides having some cosplay experience of my own, I have no idea what they went through to pick or make this look, and it could have been always ended up a lot worse. First off they need to consider the actress, the material, how it moves, how heavy it is, how it looks in movement, fight scenes, etc. - There is concept art that shows many types of looks for her, and while I think they picked my least favorite of them, people need to understand that there was a reason. We don't know and may never know, but it was a choice made. Concept art from the end of the episode:

It could have also been that it looked better in person, or that they wanted a distinct look for it in live-action to make it feel more realistic or unique. Here is other concept art of Ahsoka from Rebels and The Clone Wars, Link Here

----------------- Also, many people aren't aware of this, but the Mandalorian is made to look a lot like the OG movies. They specifically try to only use camera angles/ movements from that time. They try to do action that fits the original films style and also is similar to old westerns. They have a very specific look they're going for, and a lot of people don't know this. This also includes the use of miniatures, puppets, and as many realistic things as they can for costumes and the interactive parts of the set. They use CGI and new tech too, but aside from the large screen they use for scenery they seem to only use CGI when it's really needed and not for everything like blockbuster movies or even some shows do, aka they don’t overuse it.

Here are two links for more info on this. They are long but have a lot of cool insight into the show: link for filming style here — link for the tech they use for filming here They have the tech and probably money to have made Ahsoka's lekku & montral CGI, but it was a deliberate choice in style not to do this. Was it a good idea, maybe yes, maybe no, maybe a mix? In Season 1 Chapter 6 of The Mandalorian when they had the Twi’lek Xi’an and I saw how her lekku moved I was concerned for if they ever included lekku in a more prominent role.

As you can kind of see in the above gif, they didn't have enough weight to them and were too foamy/rubbery in their movement. It seems like the same stuff was used for Ahsoka's, which resulted in the same problem. Since we've only known her in animation where they can change things to a much more finite degree, it's off-putting in live-action, and it kinda falls into the uncanny valley which I think is why it's slightly weird to see. If we had seen her in live-action first this probably wouldn't have bothered people as much.

Video Link to show it better

I included the older Clone Wars version of Ahsoka in here because I believe they mixed her looks together to come up with the live-action design. - We saw Shaak Ti in live-action years ago and many people are pointing to that as what they should have gone with for Ahsoka. A reminder that was done for a film, not a TV show, so there will be differences in quality and style. I do think they could have used that as a model to base Ahsoka on, they should have access to old headpiece unless it just deteriorated with time. Here’s a video that includes behind the scenes looks of Shaak Ti, Youtube Link Here  

Also here’s a look of Ayla from the Prequels and from the original trilogy of the Jaba palace Twi’lek to compare how they look with the Twi’lek in the Mandalorian.

I think the original trilogy looked better than the lekku in The Mandalorian so if they’re using similar material to keep it more fitting to that time, maybe they need to make them longer to hold more weight and look like actual flesh and not foamy rubber.

They could have also gone the route of making different headpieces with other material depending on what they were being used for. Again it's a TV show, not sure if they have the time or money to do this or think it's worth it for just one episode. But they could have had one made of that foamy material for action scenes, and then one that looked more like Shaak Ti's for scenes where she just talked or moved some. Honestly, this would have been their best option, and as far as I can tell, that wasn't done. I see people mention they could have done no action or less action and made better lekku, but there are already people complaining that there wasn't enough action or movement in her action scenes. You can't please everyone, and I think they struck a good balance.

----------------

Other opinions of mine on her live-action version. I think Ashley Eckstein should have been the one to play Ahsoka in live-action, or I think they should have dubbed the voice. The actress playing her in this wasn't bad, but honestly, she brought nothing new to the role and didn't do enough to capture the smaller nuances of Ahsoka's character. Some of these problems could have been fixed by dubbing her voice, even if she didn't move or look like how people wanted Ahsoka to in live-action, having her voice would have made a big difference. I don't know if Ashley was brought in on this; she hasn't mentioned anything as far as I have seen. I would find it strange if she wasn't involved since Dave and her are friends. Both really love the character, but he doesn't have full control over the show and maybe she wasn't made a part of it for one reason or another. But if she wasn’t, I think that was a bad choice, she’s the one who brought her to life in the Clone Wars.  -  I also think that we don't always need a big name or famous person playing a character, we could have a dubbed voice and had someone performing it who was a stunt woman or an actor who isn't as well known, this has been done in Star Wars before. 

Also look at this cute cosplay of Ashley as Ahsoka:

--------------------- TLDR: Lekku and Montral are not easy to make or look real, I think the creators did the best they could with the style they try to achieve (again we don’t know behind the scenes stuff or their choices), there is stuff that could have maybe improved the look. Many people don’t understand the amount of work that goes into something like this and that sometimes choices are made for a design that you may not like, but that doesn’t make it wrong. Art is a creative thing which includes taking risks, putting a unique spin on something that exists, and sometimes making choices that not everyone will like.

--------------------

But still I’m happy we got to see live action Ahsoka and I’m glad she was able to bring joy to so many people. I’ve watched the Clone Wars since I was a kid and have always loved Ahsoka and while I have my nitpicks about her live action version, overall, I think they did a good job. I was disappointed at first, but now not so much, and instead I just view her as a different version and that she’s unique in her own ways. I remember when Rebels Ahsoka came out a lot of people hated that version, personally I loved it, there are aspects of her design I didn’t like as much tho.

I also feel this was her only appearance in The Mandalorian, I don’t think she will return again, as far as the story goes, I don’t think there is a need for her to return either. I personally would prefer to have Ahsoka stay as an animated character if she got her own show, animation suits her better and has fewer limitations for the creators.

[har-rison-s]

Run, Rabbit, Run

Request: I’m so glad you’re writing for stan!! could you maybe write a stan x reader where it’s when they are younger and it’s after the readers first encounter with pennywise and she’s freaking out so she goes to him for comfort? maybe including the babylove nickname because it’s canon and i love it!! thank you❤️

A/N: I'm glad, too. I love this one. I mean, okay, I say this about all the requests I get, but... that's the whole truth. I love all of them, each in their own unique way. I thought long and hard about the fear I could execute in this one. I've honestly also thought about what IT would turn into for me, but I can't 'decide' cos I have so many fears. I hope this turned out well and that I succeeded in making the fear... correct? Normal? Idk. My mom helped me with deciding the fear and how to execute it lmao. This was honestly hard to write. I've never written horror. Hope you like this, tho. Happy reading!

IT masterlist

main masterlist

warnings: horribly written fears and IT, panic attack

A Thursday afternoon in Derry High. Sun rays break through the long un-washed windows of the building, classrooms with thick air due to lack of air-conditioning. Quiet halls and classrooms. There's barely any soul in the high school left.

Y/N sadly got sick the previous week, so had to stay after classes to write a test she missed while sick. Her best friend Stanley was having piano lessons on Thursdays usually, enjoying the silence and the over-all deserted school building. He was the only pupil the music teacher taught piano, all the others uninterested or already good at piano. Most times Stanley even stayed until the sun started setting.

Y/N has just finished writing the test she missed out on last week and walks down the hall to the bathroom. She wants to change her hair before she leaves school today. Just get it out of the high ponytail and make a little one with the top half of her hair. A style that has suited her well her whole life. A signature hairstyle of hers.

She passes Stan's piano lessons class room and hears what he's playing very clearly. Anyone passing through this hallway would hear him playing, even from the other end. The music room has great acoustic in it. She smiles to herself and pushes the door of the girls' lavatory open, hearing its squeaks behind her when she enters the empty room.

A public bathroom in its natural element stinks horribly, but she still winces at the horrible stench. Even if she's got used to it by now. 

Y/N carefully puts her bag down on the floor, choosing a spot on the tiles that wasn't covered in some suspicious liquid. It could be just water, but she doesn't want to risk it. She sighs as she looks in the mirror. This has been a long day and she's ready to head home.

She takes out her hair-tie and her scalp immediately breathes a sigh of relief. Today's ponytail was definitely a tight one. Her hair almost cries at the release. She smiles to herself tiredly. 

As she starts picking out the hair strands to put up in a small bun, Y/N hears a sound similar to cracking, or maybe widning? Breaking? Where could it be coming from? She pays no mind to it, thinking someone's breaking tree branches outside. 

The sound grows louder and Y/N furrows her eyebrows. Sounds like it's... coming from beneath her. She's a bit scared to check the floor, but when she does, she freezes in complete horror.

The former tile floor now looks like a forest's bed and instead of where the pipes should be under the sinks, there's wooden roots. Like the ones you see in the woods. Like the ones she's always been afraid of all her life, since she was a little kiddie.

Y/N tries to grab her bag, not believing her eyes but also not wanting to stay any longer and see the elaboration of the pipe-roots. But she feels something snaking around her right ankle and as she looks down on it, she cries out. One of the roots coming from under the sink have locked around her ankle and is slowly making its way up her leg. 

Tears collect in her eyes and in such a big amount that they reach the brim and fall down on her cheeks, her dress, her hands and legs. She's in such a state of fear that she can't let out a sound. A silent panicking. 

She tries to wriggle her foot out of the plant's grasp, but it's tight as hell. Y/N does what she can with her other foot still relatively free, reaching for her backpack. She knows she has scissors in her bag, she had arts and crafts today during Home Ed. They're in the outside pocket. 

Her right hand is suddenly stopped, captured by a root that's coming out from the sink itself. Y/N's eyes widen even more, almost popping out of her skull. Physical terror almost takes over, but she makes for her backpack with her free left hand.

The moment she's got the scissors in her hand, she hears a giggle coming from behind her. Cold fright shakes her body. Should she even look behind her? Should she, for the best, close her eyes and wait for this nightmare to be over?

“Not such quick feet now, eh, Y/N?” An elderly, sort-of warped voice asks. It sends chills down her spine. No one even came in while she was here. Have they come through the window? And who are they?

She can't help her curious eyes looking up in the mirror. There she sees the most disturbing image a child could ever be beared to see. An at least six feet long... person in a clown costume is standing right behind her. Their skin is the palest white you could imagine. The lips and nose and eyes are crimson red. She hopes to the Gods that it's not blood on their face.

Their clown costume is dirty and very worn-out, looking decades old and over-used. The clown has orange hair that's sticking in the air, and wears a menacing smile. Their eyes are so big they look about to burst out, especially when they're each looking in their seperate direction.

Y/N screams and the clown laughs hysterically, and so loudly she feels like her ears and head would combust any second. She realises she needs to get herself free from the roots around her and bends down to start stabbing her scissors into the roots where they just barely are starting to wrap around her flesh. She's careful not to leave any self-injuries in the process. But it's hard to concentrate in this panic.

She's screaming and crying, afraid to death of the situation she's in. More and more roots start coming from all directions while the tall clown figure still laughs so horridly and terrifyingly. Y/N feels like she's spent, that she can't do this anymore, she can't free herself, that she'll give up and let whatever is bound to happen, happen. 

“Run, rabbit, run, rabbit, run, run, run,” the clown starts to sing when she's finally freed herself of all the roots and grabs her backpack, ready to make it out the door, “don't give the farmer his fun, fun, fun! O-ho-ho!” The clown laughs again. 

Y/N stops at the restroom door, looking at the room before her in horror. It's turning into a sort of nest, roots coming from every corner and inch, each of them wanting to grab onto some part of her. The clown stands right in the middle of it all, staring at her. She dodges the stretching roots best she can, but she won't be able to hold back for any longer.

“He'll get by without his Y/N-pie,” he continues, but his voice has dropped an octave or two, the smile no more on his horrid features, “so run, rabbit, run, rabbit,” he takes steps towards the young girl, terrifying her even more, “RUN! RUN! RUN!” He screams in the most agonising and horrible voice she's ever heard, also running towards her with sharp teeth coming from his mouth and an evil grimace twisting his face. 

Despite what her better judgement might tell her later, she listens to the creature and really does run. Out the swinging door, into the hallway without looking back. She runs into the first safest room she knows. The music room.

She practically falls through the door with a big clutter noise and terrifies poor Stanley, who's sitting alone at the piano. His eyes are wide and he jumps in his seat with a little shocked gasp. He looks upon the frightened Y/N. She's almost fallen down to the floor, her back against the door, as if she's holding it closed. As if someone might try to break in.

Stanley stands up and jogs over to her. “What's wrong?” He asks, one hand out-stretched hesitantly to her. She looks at him.

“I was... I was... There were... All around me...” She tries to explain what's just happened to her, but she makes no sense to Stan. He frowns. She looks scared, terrified. Her eyes are moving at rapid speed in every direction.

Y/N falls down on the floor, her knees against her chest and hands covering her face. In fear or embarrassment? Stanley immediately sits down next to her, legs crossed, and leans closer to her. He puts his arm around her shoulders in an attempt of an embrace and she goes in, letting the embrace happen. Needing it badly.

“There were the—the roots everywhere.” She cries. “Around my leg, around my arm. Trapping me, holding me. I couldn't get out. They wanted to—they wanted to trap me, get in me. I couldn't—”

“You're safe now.” Stanley tells her and soothes her with gently rubbing her back with his arm. 

“There was... There was a clown there.” She tells him. “In old clothes. With a white face and a horrible smile. He was singing.” Y/N says and breaks down in a seizure of cries and sobs. “And the roots wanted me! They wanted to get in me! Trap me!” She shouts.

Stanley tries to make sense of it all. Wonders if she was hallucinating, maybe someone drugged her? But no. What if it's just like the woman he saw? What if she did see... roots? Whatever that could mean. But it was a nightmare. It's not real. 

She can't stop crying. She's been exposed to her biggest fear and she can't calm down. She can't find any extra air to breathe, she feels like she's suffocating, like she's never going to calm down. It's a feeling of... no hope that you'll ever smile again. 

She can't calm down for another five minutes, at least. But Stanley stays put, holds her and listens to anything she tells him. 

“Do you think it was a nightmare?” Y/N asks him in a quiet voice, looking afar. 

“I believe so.” He replies. “It can't be real.” But is he trying to convince her or himself? Trying to calm himself down or, at last, her? “It was just like my nightmare with this... strange woman.” 

Y/N looks at him, slightly pulling apart from their embrace. Her eyes and cheeks are red, she looks lost and scared to death, still. “What woman?” She asks.

Stanley looks down. “My dad has a painting of a weird-looking woman in his office. She was trying to attack me when I was there to put the Tora back. Her face is all... twisted. She had teeth. I just ran.” He says finally and looks at her again. “But she's not real. And what you saw isn't real, okay? It was a bad, a really bad nightmare.”

She doesn't nod, but she takes his word for it. “But why did I see all that? Why now?” She asks. Perhaps she doesn't direct her question towards Stan, but to herself or something that could answer it. She sighs. “Sorry for scaring you.” Y/N apologises and sniffs. 

“Don't worry. I understand.” He tells her in response. “Do you—do you maybe want to hear something?” Stanley offers with a kind smile. She nods. Stanley playing piano sounds calming to her, and he plays so beautifully, after all. 

Stanley helps her get up from the floor and gives her a tissue to wipe her face with, one from the tissue box he always has in the music room, lying around, just in case. Y/N takes her bag and puts it on a near-by desk. 

Stan gets her a chair to sit on, putting it next to the piano, and sits down on the pianist stool. She sits down and puts her arm on the piano, resting her head in the palm of it. She watches him play one of Chopin's Nocturnes, watches his face change with every note he plays. He's careful not to mess up at any point. But she wouldn't think anything of it if he did. 

She feels peaceful, calm. The soft sounds of the piano playing in a completely empty room and, probably, building, calm her down and make her feel at peace with herself. 

Y/N has always been first in P.E. class. She's competed in sprints and running competitions and marathons since she can remember. It's one thing that gets her away from everyone else (quite literally) and from any thoughts that she'd find unwelcome - running. 

At one point in her secondary school years, she was running a kids marathon through the woods and tripped on a tree branch, getting her left foot stuck under a tree root by accident.

It was the first time she felt trapped. It was the first time she didn't win the marathon. It was the first time she didn't get any of the three first places. It was the first time she sprained her ankle. And the first time she felt genuenly scared for her life.

For her, it felt like the end of the world. It felt like no one would be coming to save her. But when they finally would come, the tree root would have already grown around and in her leg and stayed with her until the end of her life. She thought she'd have to live with a tree stuck to her, a root in her leg. She thought she'd never run again.

Permanent taglist: @v0idbella @inlovewithmiddleagedcelebs @works-of-fanfiction @destiel-stucky4ever-loki-queen @stfxlou @ur-gunna-h8-ths@empressdreams @betweenloveandfire @but-legendsneverdie @deardeacy @thewinchesterchronicles @mavieesttriste16 @mrsmazzello @benhardyseyes @langdonzvoid@intrrverted @the-freak-cassie-131

Stanley Uris tag-list: @nightbu-g

[aharris00britney]

ASKS 16

haha remember in July when I said I was gonna answer stuff every month... yeah me neither 🙈🙈 anyways lots of stuff under the cut

Anonymous said: You should get along with other Simblrs and start a new cc group now that PTS is disbanded, your hairs and clothes are always amazing! :D

Firstly thank you! Most of the clothing in AxA is 99% ayoshi with me going in after and cleaning/adding some stuff. So I give him props for the clothes :P As far as a ‘new PTS’ style group idk, there are a lot of amazing creators on simblr but I think the reason PTS was such a special thing is because the bond they all had. I feel that when working on collabs with some of my really close friends (such as the one coming out this month with @dogsill​ and @ayoshi​) because we have known each other for over 2 years now. A group of friends built only for collabing purposes would be more of a hassle than an enjoyment imo. <3

Anonymous said: HELLLOOOO! just curious bc why not but what is your favorite creation that you have made??

It varies every month to be honest lmao. If you asked me to pick a favorite hair from each month? Easy, always the last release of the month. But favorite hair ever? Awwww shucks 🤠 lmao I would say my Madison Hair is one of my favorite hair releases, I am planning to revamp it soon to work with my Mia ombre accessories and tidy the mesh up some. 

Anonymous said: hello, when will this collection be free for public download please? /post/186706149526/patreon-08-19

That came out in August luv, go to my downloads page and click AxA 2019

Anonymous said: Hi! Idk if you do wcif!!!! But if you do, wcif the freckles on the girl with the short hair on the BOP AHOOB collab?? If you know! Thank you much in advance!!!!!

Hey! You’ll need to send Bowl-Of-Plumbobs a message for that WCIF, that was his Sim otherwise I would link you. Sorry hun

@lumalinrose-sims​ said: Not a question, but you are like so cool I can't even--

thank you lmao I appreciate it, your profile pic it pretty cool :P

@ang3lba3 said: sarah is so pretty!!! is there a way to download how she looks in its entirety, or no? (sorry if this is a silly question im pretty new to the sims) 

not silly don’t worry :P the Sarah hair is for download on the post, the sim can be downloaded here but she is a bit outdated as I have changed her somewhat since then. 

Anonymous said: Hihi just stopping by to tell you how much I love your hairs!!

thank you so much! I appreciate the love<3

Anonymous said: hi! i just wanted to say that i love your cc so much i and always look forward to your posts! you make the cutest cc ever and honestly you're probably my favorite cc maker. you also seem like such a chill and genuine person we truly stan.

fgvhbjn thank you lmao I am literally TOO CHILL irl lmao I let people run over me so much but it’s whatever. Thank you again for the super sweet message. Have a great day if you’re reading this :)

Anonymous said: Heeeey we have the same name

Austin club :P great name til you’re trying to sign something and it looks awful (at least for me I can’t do my signature for shit)

Anonymous said: the collab with bop is so boring and dull it’s drier than a cracker it’s a no from me

well not everything is going to be someones cup of tea lmao I’m sure there is someone that enjoys it which counters you’re negative view <3

Anonymous said: Hi I love your cc! I have almost all of it in my game and I love your tropical punch palette so much I was wondering if you would ever consider releasing the palette.

If I ever make an ombre accessory tutorial video I will release a set of actions for the palette. If you wanna use the palette feel free to grab the hex codes from S4S.

Anonymous said: How did you become a ea game changer? Was it through Tumblr or youtube?

About a year ago SimGuruKate was the community manager and had applications for Tumblr Game Changers, I applied and got accepted. Follow SimGuruFrost on Twitter to stay up to date on when new applications are open.

Anonymous said: Are you going to upload the hair you made on your livestream? I literally love your work and am a Patreon subscriber!!!

Hey! The hair will be in my October voting (I think) and if it wins, release will be November. If it doesn’t win I will put it in November voting and so forth til it wins. Also thank you for watching the stream and supporting me on Patreon 

Anonymous said: hello!! i just wanted to see if knew is there’s anyway i can save my cc and save files somehow where i can download them again if my computer breaks so i don’t have to download it all again.?

zip your Sims 4 folder and upload it to Google Drive/SimsFileShare/OneDrive. Then when you install Sims 4 again you just replace the folder made in Electronic Arts in your Documents.

Anonymous said: what face do you make when your in love with a bee?

this is an old anon so I doubt they’re gonna check for this, and I can’t find the joke on Google so.... anybody know it?

Anonymous said: i love these collab sets they are honestly gifts from above

mhmm gifts from above for every collab except those in October... those are from below  👹 😳

Anonymous said: the pack is sooooo cute i love everything omg!!!! The male stuff is so adorable i can’t wait to download   

Anonymous said: you guys are the only ones i go to for packs i would love to see build buy items in the future we don’t get a lot mm stuff like that

Anonymous said:i just want to say thank you for putting in so much time and hard work and dedication to creating cc for us. i hope there's never a moment when you feel unappreciated, and i want you to know we all love you!

@primadonnaliferiseandfall​ said: all hail you and ayoshi for the cc pack its so pretty omg!!!!

Anonymous said: omg the kings have delivered!!

Anonymous said: since we got axa 2019 and 2018 will there be an axa 2020? 👀

Anonymous said: Great job on the pack! Everyone's items look gorgeous! Thank you for making this, you talented human being.

Anonymous said: ilysm! that’s all 💓💫

Anonymous said: just wanted to let you know that your content is absolutely amazing and i love it all :) sending love from the uk👍

Anonymous said: would you and ayoshi consider sharing the psds for some of the stuff in your collab? please?

thank you guys so much! Me and Ayoshi were super super happy with the AxA 2019 release and we are so happy with how many people have liked it. AxA 2020 will be a thing, yes. Also I have been working on PSDs that are super easy to navigate. I will get those up soon hopefully.

@graphicpickles​ said: Hey um, I dont know if you were aware of this but your discord link is broken ^^"

hey! this is super late sorry, discord link should be working now. If not: https://discord.gg/CtQR9tb

Anonymous said: Why would you include a cc hair in a preview for a cas review

because I liked the hair and wanted to use it 😗

@goddesssimmerina​ said: I just stopped by to tell you how much I LOVE your content. *_* I just went through and downloaded soooo much! xD I actually just switched to using MM hair and i'm so glad I did because I'm finding so many of you amazing creators and I thank you all sm! :*

awe thank you!! I appreciate it. Welcome to MM hair world :P

@moonbrightsims said: whats ur origin id?

AHarris00Britney

Anonymous said: how are your photos/screenshots so high quality? seriously, do you use a mod for it or idk editing? or maybe your settings?

Ultra Settings, and I use SRWE for HQ pics. 

Anonymous said: if you don’t answer this ask you’re straight

It has been answered. I am no longer straight. Was a hard two months not answering this 😔😔😔

Anonymous said: Hi, would you mind teaching us how you make the LoDs of your hairs? I opened one of them in S4S and found out your LoDs are great looking. I use decimate tool in blender and they look really bad.

I edge split everything before I decimate in Blender, I also delete the hairline and extrude the mesh inside the head before decimating as well. Really confusing to explain in words sorry. Might make a tutorial.

Anonymous said: omg ur cc finds blog has apink namjoo as icon and header. i'm.. sCREAMING. austin knows royalty

yes ma’am now where is the comeback

- it was at this point I realized I have caught up with my last asks post and have answered 4 things over again from Asks 15. Well... I guess that’s it folks

see yall in asks 17 in 2 months.... maybe the end of October idk

[soleilstm]

(  jennie  kim  ,  twenty  -  one  ,  &  cis  female  )  who  ?  these  days  ,  it’s  all  about   soleil  ‘ sol ’  ryu   ,  who  comes  from    san  francisco ,  ca   and  is  making  headlines  as  an    actress    .   she  currently  has  a  fan  count  of  38k  ,  no  thanks  to  the  rumors  of  them  being  peevish  !  but  ,  on  the  other  hand  ,  their  most  devout  fans  say  they’re  actually  wilful  .  last  i  heard  ,  they  caused  quite  a  buzz  when  she  got  casted  for  the  lead  role  in  the  next  a24  film  !  it’s  no  wonder  they  remind  me  of   glitter  eyeliner ,  bitten  fingernails ,  the  quiet  grey  before  a  thunderstorm ,  deep  breaths  before  leaving  the  house ,  sickeningly  sweet  fake  laughter  &  the  addictive  flash  of  the  cameras   . 

     hi hi, how are y’all doing ? my name is bea, i’m twenty yrs old, i use she/her pronouns and i’m from the gmt tz ! i’m super excited to be rping with y’all and i hope my brand new muse sol might spark some interest in a few people so we can plot, plot and also plot ! you can find a little bit more about her underneath the cut as well as a couple wcs. if you like this post i’ll assume you want to plot and IM you, so click the heart at your own risk ! x 

statistics.

background. 

the  story  goes  as  following:  man  meets  woman.  both  man  and  woman  are  fresh  out  of  med  school,  trying  to  survive  their  internship  as  the  only  two  immigrant  interns.  they  get  closer  and  closer.  two  years  later,  a  baby  girl  is  born.  she  is  not  who  this  story  is  about.  she  is  the  warning,  to  the  man  and  the  woman.  she  says  ‘  you  are  great  doctors,  but  you  are  not  good  parents.’  sadly,  they  don’t  hear  her,  because  they’re  busy  at  work  while  a  nanny  takes  care  of  her.  she  grows  into  a  lonely  toddler,  until  that  fateful  moment,  at  age  five,  when  the  protagonist  of  this  story  is  born.  they  say  she  cries  and  giggles  in  the  delivery  room,  making  sure  no  one  can  miss  her  or  ignore  her.  even  her  own  mother  can’t  help  but  stare  at  her  scrunched  up  face,  stuck  between  a  frown  and  a  laugh.  they  call  her  soleil,  for  the  sun.  or  sol,  to  her  older  sister,  who  finally  has  someone  to  play  with.  

the  years  pass  the  ryu  family  by,  settling  into  a  peaceful  routine  for  the  most  part.  sol’s  parents  are  at  work,  vying  for  another  promotion.  her  mother,  olivia,  stops  by  the  house  every  once  in  a  while,  because  she  heard  daughters  that  grow  up  without  a  mother  turn  elsewhere  for  attention.  and  really,  she  won’t  have  either  of  them  falling  out  of  track.  there  is  a  path  laid  out  for  them,  of  science  and  medicine  and  upholding  the  family  legacy,  that  she  reminds  them  of  every  time  she  hugs  them  in  that  precise,  medical  way.  sol’s  sister,  rose,  listens  intensily.  sol,  on  the  other  hand,  becomes  very  good  at  pretending  she  is,  as  well.  it’s  all  thanks  to  the  theater  club  she’s  joined,  after  getting  a  half-asleep  signature  from  her  father  on  the  one  day  of  the  week  he  sleeps  at  home.  she  excels  at  it,  forming  her  own  little  world  where  they  can’t  see  her.  except  for  rose,  who’s  determined  to  make  her  care  about  what  their  mother  cares.  so  sol  goes  along,  because  she  doesn’t  want  to  hurt  rose.  she  would  never  do  anything  to  hurt  the  only  sincere  hug  of  her  life.  

but  peace  can’t  last  forever,  and  this  she  learns  on  her  junior  year  of  high  school.  her  mother  finds  her  early  acceptance  to  juilliard  by  accident,  stumbling  home  after  her  congratulations  party  for  becoming  chief  of  surgery.  rose  is  long  gone  by  then,  graduating  top  of  her  class  and  enrolling  in  medical  school.  sol  had  gotten  so  good  at  pretending,  they  all  believed  she  would  follow  suit.  in  that  very  moment,  sol  walks  in  to  see  her  mother  rip  the  letter  to  shreds,  her  face  a  massive  red  welt.  they  fight,  the  entire  night.  her  father  comes  home,  and  they  fight  some  more.  there  is  no  way  she’s  pursuing  this  nonsense.  there  is  no  way  she’s  ever  becoming  an  actress.  no  matter  how  much  she  cries,  cloudy  skies  taking  over  her  delicate  features,  they  don’t  hear  her.  they  never  hear  her.  she  gives  in.  she  accepts  her  fate.  she’ll  follow  rose’s  path,  if  that’s  what  they  want.  they  hug  her,  still  as  mechanical  as  ever,  and  she  goes  to  bed.  the  thing  with  being  as  gifted  as  she  is,  is  that  lying  becomes  an  art  none  of  them  will  ever  appreciate.  so  she  packs  her  bag,  a  hundred  dollars  in  her  pocket,  and  escapes  with  the  moon  high  in  the  sky.  

she  wishes  she  could  say  her  path  after  that  moment  is  without  flaws.  that  none  of  it  involves  days  upon  days  of  couch-surfing,  of  scrambling  for  minimum  wages,  of  terribly  missing  the  life  she  had  before.  at  night,  she  goes  to  sleep  wondering  if  her  dream  is  worth  all  of  this.  and  when  the  sun  rises  in  the  morning,  she  wakes  up  knowing  it  is.

after  that,  she  hustled  doing  a  lot  of  short  films  that  went  for  the  most  part  unnoticed  while  waitressing  on  the  side,  until  one  of  them  actually  made  it  to  a  major  film  festival  where  she  began  to  gain  traction  and  more  movie  roles.  it  wasn’t  until  she  got  the  role  of  joi  in  blade  runner  2049  two  years  ago  that  she  really  made  a  dent  and  got  noticed  by  the  big  producers.  now,  she’s  lives  her  life  day  by  day,  putting  her  work  above  everything.

personality. 

sol  is  the  most  stubborn  person  you’ll  ever  meet.  nothing  can  ever  get  in  the  way  of  what  she  wants,  and  it  doesn’t  matter  how  long  or  how  hard  she  has  to  fight  for  it.  .  .  she’ll  get  it,  in  the  end.  despite  her  confident  persona,  she  is  also  extremely  anxious.  she’ll  always  see  everything  through,  but  she’ll  spend  the  entire  time  imagining  everything  that  could  go  wrong.  it’s  a  part  of  herself  that  stays  perfectly  hidden  behind  gummy  smiles.  she  can  be  unpredictable,  as  well.  her  patience  levels  dim  day  after  day,  and  before  you  know  it,  something  that  made  her  smile  a  week  ago  now  irritates  her  to  no  end.  fame  definitely  has  something  to  do  with  it.  the  more  love  and  admiration  she  receives,  the  harder  she  finds  to  control  her  moods.  basically,  she’s  turning  bit  by  bit  into  a  diva.  right  now,  you’ll  miss  it  if  you  blink.  but  she’s  steadily  running  towards  it.  she’s  an  introvert,  and  though  she  can  carry  a  conversation,  she’ll  need  several  hours  to  recharge  afterwards  from  the  effort.  it’s  common  that  after  shooting  a  movie,  she’ll  retreat  into  her  apartment  for  a  week  or  two  without  contacting  the  rest  of  the  world.

connections. 

i’m  a  lot  more  open  to  either  brainstorming  or  fitting  in  your  wcs  buuut  i  could  see  one  of  these  three  tbqh.  but  like  i  said,  i’ll  mold  into  yours  or  we’ll  make  something  from  nothing  !

childhood friends if  anyone  comes  from  the  bay  area,  maybe  they  let  sol  couch  surf  at  their  place  for  a  while.  they  know  each  other  better  than  anyone  else,  but  it’s  also  something  really  chill  and  sweet.

rivals in  the  industry  could  be  a  lot  of  fun,  as  well.  they’re  always  battling  it  out  for  roles  and  polls  and  all  of  that,  maybe  it’s  positive  and  drives  them  to  do  better  or  maybe  it’s  just  a  lot  of  cattiness  and  low  blows  because  why  not  lmao.

exes, from  the  beginning  of  her  hollywood  chase  and  now  that  they’re  both  rising  it  got  harder  and  harder  to  be  with  each  other  so  they  called  it  quits  for  the  sake  of  their  careers  but  there’s  still  a  lot  of  lingering  feelings  and  jealousy  and  all  that.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #211

"i was told when i get older all my fears would shrink, but now i'm insecure and i care what people think."

What is your favorite time of day? Morning. What is your third favorite color? Ummm maybe peach. Do you care what others think of you? In most contexts, very much so. How would you dress, if you were the opposite sex? Same style I do now, really. Though not tank tops and dance pants; I'm sure I'd mostly wear loose band or graphic tees and sweatpants. Can you remember your first phone? If so, what kind was it? I think I might? I believe it was a blue one where the keyboard slides out from the bottom. Small and square-ish. What do you do to maintain your eyebrows? Nothing. What was the naughtiest thing you did when you were a child? I bit my sister's back so hard that I made her bleed, lmao. Sorry Ash. What, in your opinion, is the most thirst-quenching drink? COLD WATER. Who is your favorite character from Alice in Wonderland? Cheshire cat. Name the closest body of water to where you live: Atlantic Ocean. What do you like to put on toast? Light layer of butter and then cinnamon and sugar. The true cinnamon toast. Do you like art? Of course. How about theater? I don't have too much of an opinion... other than it has potential to be incredibly cheesy. Have you ever made breakfast for someone? Yes. Do you talk to your crush? If you have one. She's way more than that, and we talk every day. If yes, what do you usually talk about? Loads of stuff. What was the last thing you bought? With my own money, I don't have a clue. Have you ever been considered popular? No. Your signature perfume? I don't have one. Favorite undersea creature? Sea turtles, seahorses, jellyfish... Describe your room with just 5 words. Small, crowded, zoo, artsy, and... idk. Favorite type of chocolate? Milk. What types of things would you plant in a garden? If I actually wanted one, lots of flowers. Maybe tomatoes because fresh tomatoes + bacon and mayonnaise sandwiches are fucking incredible. Favorite attraction at a carnival? Ferris wheel. What toys did you play with as a child? Plastic animals, Pokemon figures, and stuffed animals were common. Oh yeah, I loved Lincoln Logs too. What types of music do you listen to? Various kinds of metal and rock as well as indie. What, without fail, makes you cry? Mufasa dying lmao. What makes a movie really enjoyable for you? A cool plot. Usually fantasy elements. Favorite way to decorate a cake? *shrugs* What gift(s) did you get for your birthday last year? I don't remember. What do you daydream about the most? My future. Name a game you are really good at. Shadow of the Colossus probably, but considering how infrequently I play games now, I'm sure I'm nowhere near as good as I used to be. Whenever I get a PS4 and the remake tho, I'm getting that goddamn white Agro. I never did the timed challenges before, but I think I could do it. What kinds of snacks do you munch on? I don't really have snacks anymore; I try to keep them out of the house so I'm not tempted. If anything though, it'll probably be some kind of chip. What emotionally exhausts you? Socializing. What accessories would come with a doll version of you? A laptop, iPod, and medication lmao. Favorite thing to do when it’s night time? Sleep? I've sure grown into a fun person. How do you like to bathe/shower? With hot-ish water. The most childish part of your personality? I absolutely hate chores. Favorite type of fantasy creature? Dragons. Do your arms move when you walk? I... actually don't know and can't even visualize how I walk right now. Favorite photo search engine? Google. Are there such things as stupid questions? Depends on your age and some other factors, I guess. Do you celebrate April Fools Day? No. I hate it, honestly. Do you doggie paddle or actually swim in a pool? Both. How do you cure boredom? I'd love to fucking know. I'm always bored. Ankle socks or knee-highs? Ankle socks. Do you know how military time works? Yes, but I can't comprehend the time immediately if it's passed 12. What’s your daily routine? Wake up, check the time, use the bathroom, have breakfast, feed my cat, sit on the laptop doing nothing, maybe or maybe not have a nap at some point, shower if I need to whatever time I feel like, also brush my teeth at some random point during the day (unless I have to go somewhere; then I'll do it before I leave), eat dinner, feed the other pets, and go to bed. Did you get in trouble for cussing on accident when you were a kid? I literally yelled "HOLY SHIT, I THINK I SEE A SHARK!" when we were all in the car driving over a bridge and I swear I saw a fin in the water, lmao. Mom was. Not happy. Ever made a snow angel? Yes. Are you short or tall for your age? I'm average. At what age did you learn the Pledge of Allegiance? Idk, early elementary school. What’s the longest you’ve gone without food? When my appetite was like non-existent and I lost a shitload of weight, I think I almost went a full 24 hours. What do you think about most? What's stressing me out. Are you honestly a good person? I don't think I'm a bad one. Where would you like to be buried? I'd rather be cremated. Do you use Bing or Google? Google. Last song you listened to? "Damage" by Fit For Rivals. Last movie you watched ALL the way through? The Shining. Howwww had I not seen it sooner. Last thing you wrote down? The time I was meeting with my job coach on the calendar. What was the last movie you saw in theaters? Detective Pikachu. What is ONE thing your fridge or pantry ALWAYS needs? My day will feel so off if I don't have one Mtn. Dew Voltage. Do you believe more in luck or hard work? That's a good question. Sometimes you can work your ass off and yet reap inadequate - or any - rewards, while some people pick up a lottery ticket once in their life and are suddenly a millionaire. Life's not fair, kids. But I like to think hard work usually prevails. Do you have any metal on or in your body right now? Piercings. What is your favorite thing to eat with dip? Plain chips with sour cream dip... yum. Do you consider yourself a heartbreaker? Nope. Who was the last person to tag a picture of you? Who even knows. I don't get tagged in pictures because I'm never with people to take and tag me in any lmao. Have you ever liked someone much older than you? No. Is there someone you always, secretly hope will talk to you? It's not a secret that I want to talk to Jason ONE last time to apologize on MY end. What was your first favorite band? Backstreet Boys. Are you friends with any bands? A local band, yeah; their guitarist is an old friend. Do you stay up ridiculously late for no reason? Very very rarely now. What’s your life motto? Idk, I've never really thought about it. Last year for school, we had an assignment where we had to choose a popular song to write a story based on. What song would you’ve picked? A popular song? Oh boy, idk. I don't really know what's popular that I like... Well, guess I'll think of old songs I know were. Um... Oh well I love writing sad shit, so maybe "Runaway Love" by Ludacris ft. Mary J. Blige. I already had an RP plot that was kinda inspired by it lmao. Do you like 3OH!3? If I said I wouldn't belt "'CUZ I'M A VEGETARIAN AND I AIN'T FUCKIN' SCARED'A HIM" at a club at 2 in the morning I'd be lying. Did the vacuum scare you as a child? No. Do you have a long driveway? No. Anyone’s grave you visit, regularly? No. Who was your first kiss? First person who kissed me was Juan, first mutual kiss (which I consider my "real" first) was with Jason. What was it like? Were you disappointed? Juan's kiss I didn't want, and it made me confused at the time. I had no clue how I felt about him back then. With Jason, it was incredibly sweet. I was lucky to get like a fairy tale one and not a horribly awkward memory lmao. Do you have an older brother? If so, what’s he like? Yeah. He's super super intelligent and a deep thinker. Very mature and has a great sense of humor. Are you confident? hunty- Have you ever begged someone to stay with you? Yes. Who do you want around you when you’re afraid? More than anyone, Mom. Had separation anxiety as a kid, obviously grew out of it, but if I'm seriously scared, I want my mom's presence. Like if I'm sick (I'm petrified of vomiting alskdfjaowie) or we're having risky weather, stuff like that, I want her with me. Have you ever mistaken something’s shadow for something else? Probably at some point. Indie, rock, electronic, techno, dubstep, or ‘crunk’? The hell is "crunk" music. Rock. Do you know how to read a map? I have no clue 'cuz I've never actually used a real one. Have a friend that looks JUST like a celeb? Not off the top of my head. Are you good at basketball? I used to be, but I haven't played in forever. It was probably my favorite sport that I ever played. Or softball. Are you friends with anyone missing one of their five senses? Not that I know of. How many times have you moved in your lifetime? Three. Are you good at Pac-Man? I was never exceptional. I haven't played it in yeeeaaars. Have you ever been called 'jail bate’? No. Have you ever been seriously addicted to anything? Technology oops like I barely know how to function without it, sadly. Ever lied to get out of going somewhere with someone? Yes. Where did you meet your current or last significant other? YouTube. Do you like to eat pasta? Yes. Do you enjoy wine? Most bitter shit in the world. Noooooooot a fan. How long have you been driving? I've had my permit since senior year of high school (I think senior???), but I still don't have my license. What’s your lawyer’s name? N/A What’s the last thing you watched on Netflix? Good question. Do you play any video games? The only one I play regularly is World of Warcraft; it's the only "ongoing" game I play. Why were you last in the hospital? My sister got into a wreck. Would you ever get a face tattoo? Possibly something small and subtle, but I doubt it. Have you ever gambled? No. What has been your most epic cooking failure? I split a hot dog entirely in half in the microwave because I thought it'd take much longer to warm up than it actually did. Do you read other people’s survey answers on here? Sometimes. Do you agree with the saying ‘distance makes the heart grow fonder?’ With my experience with Sara, yes. Do you know any transgender people? I knew someone who like... swapped back and forth five thousand times. Then one of my friends had a transgender "phase," if it's appropriate to call it that. Have you ever had a parrot sit on your shoulder? Don't think so. In the morning, do you eat breakfast first or brush your teeth first? Eat. Why would you eat RIGHT AFTER brushing your teeth. What sort of window coverings do you have in your living room? Blinds. Has anyone in your life ever treated you abusively? No. How long has it been since your last breakup? A year and a half. What’s the name of the amusement park closest to your house? Uhhh I think Busch Gardens in Virginia? Do you like The Rolling Stones? Yeah. What was the last single item you spent over $100 on? A plane ticket. Can you read tarot cards? No. What is the last non-fiction book that you read? I have zero clue. Do you prefer lemons or limes? Lemons. Do you prefer peppermint or spearmint? I don't think I even taste the difference. Have you ever written a special note in a book? Yeah, I did in a book Jason lent me. Turns out it's a bad idea to write in pen a lil love letter on the back of the front cover to a book that was also for collection purposes lmao, but he wasn't mad. Would you rather have a house exterior made from wood, brick, or stucco? I like wood aesthetically, but I think eliminating wood housing would be a good idea, so brick. Brick also makes me feel safer. What is your favorite candy bar? Those big rectangle Reese's ones with individual blocks. I fucking love them. Have you ever thrown up in public? I know at least one occasion in I believe kindergarten where I did on the classroom floor, oof. Pepsi or Sprite? I hate Pepsi and I'm not a Sprite fan either, but if I had to, I'd drink the latter. How many video games do you own? We have an old CD case just about full of them. Have you ever stripped? No. Even if you are not Christian or never celebrated Christmas, do you think you will raise your (possible future) children to believe in Santa Clause? Why or why not? I don't want kids, but if I did, I probably would. It's just a magical, fun thing as a kid. Who has the most interesting phone cover you know or what was the most interesting one you have come across (in store or online)? Sara has a really cute chameleon one. Would you rather play a game such as World of Warcraft, League of Legends, or an app/Facebook game (Candy Crush, Bejeweled)? Y'all know. What’s the most amount of messages you either woke up to on a social media site or your phone? Idk, not a lot. When you have nightmares, do they normally have the same theme (ex. always being killed) or do they just relate to something going on in your life at the moment/random? They're very commonly either with me dying or about to be raped. Some surveys ask if you ever stepped in dog poop. However, have you ever stepped in animal pee? Yup. When’s the last time you or someone else has overstayed their visit? Whenever Girt last came over forever ago. He always does lmao. Have you ever consumed a full bottle of liquid medicine in one shot? Is there ANY medication you can actually do that with and not die???? Have you ever had a hamster? Yes. If you had a choice, would you rather eat chicken or beef? Chicken. What was your favorite birthday cake like? I don't remember any specifically. Would you prefer bacon or sausage? Tough call, but probably bacon. How many books have you read in the past YEAR? Zero. Do you type with all of your fingers, like you are taught in school? Yes. Have you ever put gum on the bottom of your desk/chair? No, grosses me the hell out. At what age were you the most physically attractive? The least? During high school; 2016. If you intend to get married, what are you looking forward to/dreading about wedding planning? I think planning the vows will be fun (I don't want references to God, fuck saying my dad has to "give me away," etc.) as well as the theme, and then I don't think I'm dreading anything about planning. Who are you most nervous about introducing potential significant others to? Mom. What is the craziest thing you have done to lose weight? I haven't done anything "crazy." Which parent do you most resemble? Idk. What is the best job you’ve ever had? Never had one I liked. How do you feel about monogamy as a whole? It's definitely what I find to be the better option. You're minimizing the risk of spreading STDs, and plus I personally see love as a one-on-one thing, not open to multiple. What is the most exciting thing about your life right now? LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL What was the most important non-academic thing you learned in high school? Probably some life lessons from my favorite teacher. Have you ever lived alone? Do you prefer living by yourself or with someone else? No. I never want to live alone. Do you and your friends ever talk about your sex lives? I don't have a friend to discuss that with, but I also don't have a sex life. Has anyone ever criticized your appearance? What did they say and how did you take it? Yeah. It was typically about my piercings or how I dressed (particularly ripped skinny jeans), and neither of those ever got to me. I love my piercings and style. How common is it for you to get jealous in romantic or platonic relationships? It's rare. When someone asks you about your number of sexual partners, do you include oral sex partners? I probably would if there was anyone who fit that criteria but I wasn't "fully" sexual with. It's still sexual. Have you ever had a job that deeply affected your personal life? How so and do you still work there? No. What is the most serious injury you’ve ever sustained? When I passed out onto my chin and ended up with a really deep cut, broke multiple teeth, and got a concussion. What were the best and worst interviews you’ve ever had? What made them so good/bad? None stand out for either end of the spectrum. List three people you’ve had crushes on. Just to make it interesting, I'll name people I had crushes on but never dated. Sebastian, Kyle, and Mini. How old were you when you were first head over heels in love? 16. Has loving someone ever made you miserable? Boy, have you heard about my Historical Breakup? How bad are your worst cramps on a scale of 1-10? They used to be easy 10s, but now that BC helps me, I'd say the worst are like... rarely 7-8s. Have you ever thrown up from cramps? No. What is the most physically painful thing you’ve ever experienced? I 110% should've been under anesthesia when I got an infected cyst drained. I wanted to fucking die to get it over with. Do you have an embarrassing period story? If so, what is it? No. Did your school allow you to have pain medicine on you? I think so? I do know you couldn't share it, though. Do you ever comfort eat? I get the urge to when I'm depressed, but I stopped doing it. If applicable, what form of birth control do you use? Pills and not being with a man. What is your sexual orientation? Bisexual. Have you ever questioned your sexuality? Yes. What gender do you identify as? Female. What gender were you born as? Female. Have you ever gotten high off a prescription medication? No. Can you still wear clothes from the children’s section? Pf, hell no. Are you lonely? Very. Do you have allergies? Yes. How old were you when your parents talked to you about puberty? However old I was in 5th grade when we had family life class. Do you take vitamins? Only one I'm prescribed for for vitamin D. Do you like fantasy better than reality? Yep. Have you ever contemplated suicide? Yeah. Have you ever self-harmed? Yes. How many people have you known who were suicidal? Multiple, sadly. What’s your favorite pain reliever? Advil. Who has the cutest baby/babies you know? My acquaintance has an absolutely beautiful daughter. What’s the most expensive thing your car needed to get done? N/A If you had a thousand dollars to spend on a pricey brand you like but can’t really afford (until now of course), which ONE brand would you chose? I have no clue. I don't really know pricey brands that don't have the ugliest shit. How many pairs of flip flops do you own? One. Do you still talk to any of your old teachers? One, yes. She's a family friend now. What color was the dress you wore to your senior prom? Black. Ever go to another school’s prom? No. Ever take Melatonin supplements to help you go to sleep? When I used to have AWFUL insomnia, it was the only way I could sleep. Do you like burning candles or incense? Incense especially. Ever throw a pair of your shoes in the washing machine? How did they come out? Not that I remember. Do you ever venture into the woods? What do you normally do in there? No. Do you like to wear shorts or capris in the summer? No. I hate my legs, nor do I regularly shave. Does your phone have a keyboard, touch screen, or neither? Touch screen. How did you dress your freshman year of high school? Emo. Were you obsessed with the Spice Girls back in the day? Obsessed, no, but I liked them. Have you ever had an encounter with the paranormal? Yes. Would you do your own surgery so keep yourself alive? (ex. stitches) I mean yeah, if I had no choice. Would you rather read poetry or write poetry? Write. Have you ever had any really infected injuries? An ear piercing got an infection once. Is there any band out there that you like every song by them? No. Would you ever work for Google? I mean, I don't see why not? Do people that are ungrateful for everything bother you? Immensely. Are you popular on any websites? No, not really. If you ruled the world, what is the first law that you would make? Probablyyyy the banning of at least single-use plastics, but hopefully plastics as a whole if doable. When was the last time you played jump rope? Not since being a kid, probably. Do you hate it when people look over your shoulder? I can't do ANYTHING if someone is. Do you know anyone who has had a heart attack under 30 years of age? No. If you were starving would you eat food out of a garbage can? If I found something that didn't look dangerous, yeah, in order to survive. When is the last time you had your vision checked? Like two months ago. When is the last time you had your hearing checked? Some time last year when I had that whole ordeal with my ears. Do you know your blood type? It's A-. Do you donate blood/platelets/plasma/etc.? No, I don't drink enough water. Ever been in the emergency room? Way more times than I like. Have you ever been robbed? No, thankfully. Ever kiss someone on the first date? No. Do you own any Burt’s Bees products? No. Dr. Pepper or Root Beer? Dr. Pepper. What’s your favorite picture of your mom? Dad? I have one of Mom I took for a photography course of her laughing, and I fucking love it. She rarely laughs. Dad, I'm not sure. Are you subscribed to anything (Magazines, monthly boxes, streaming sites, etc.)? No. Favorite flavor of cream cheese? ... It has flavors? Do you have any board games? If so, where do you keep them? Yeah; they're at the top of a cabinet in the living room. Is there an ice cream flavor you don’t like? Of ones I've tried (I'm not very adventurous with food), I loathe strawberry. What’s the raunchiest thing you’ve ever stumbled upon? I don't know, don't wanna know. I steer clear of that side of the Internet. Hm, it was probably something on dA that had a mature content filter that I looked at anyway because it had an intriguing name. That site can have some wild-ass shit. How rude is it to snap your fingers at a waiter or waitress? Have you done it before? That is incredibly rude. They're not dogs. I've never done that. Best way for someone to bond with you? Let's talk about deep shit and philosophy. Discuss interesting, unorthodox topics. Show me you have an open mind. What is the first meme you remember seeing? BOY, I don't know. Maybe Overly-Attached Girlfriend? Suitcase, duffel bag, or backpack? Duffel bag. Sci-fi, fantasy, or superheroes? Fantasy. Favorite font? Out of the default options, Garamond. Favorite fairy tale? Fucking FIGHT ME if you say Shrek isn't one. Forget the memes and such, I genuinely love the movies. Favorite tradition? By this point in my life, we don't really follow any traditions... but I do know as a kid I would NEVER let Mom forget we had to make "reindeer food." When a Christmas light show was still here, we would also go there and grab hot chocolate and chocolate-covered peanuts. I miss that. Talent you’re proud of having? I think I'm an above-average writer. Favorite website from your childhood? Webkinz. :') Any good luck charms? Nope. Least favorite flavor of food or drink? Cranberry. Least favorite pattern? Uhhh... I'm not big on animal print. Favorite potato food? Fries my man. Do you call them fireflies or lightning bugs? Fireflies. Lamps, overhead lights, fairy lights, or sunlight? FAIRY LIGHTS. How many phone numbers do you have memorized? Two lmao. Favorite historical era? The Renaissance. What are some must-have Google Chrome extensions? If you don’t use Chrome, how about on other internet browsers? AdBlock. What piece of stand up comedy (10 minutes or less) has successfully made you cry with laughter? Oh boy, a lot. I love stand-up. What little “Easter Eggs” on websites do you love? If you don’t have one on a website, how about in a game, TV show, or movie? Boy, got plenty in games. The secret Silent Hill 4 replica room in Silent Hill: Downpour I especially love; I had no idea it was in the game 'til I played it and found it myself. Then the butterfly barrel in the PS4 remake of Shadow of the Colossus in reference to The Last Guardian is awesome. World of Warcraft's Robin Williams genie tribute is lovely as well. Besides pornography, what is a website you frequent and don’t want anyone to know? Nothing. What GIF reduces you to hysterical laughter every time? Don't know about every time. What things that are legal do you think shouldn’t be? Smoking, but I understand why we can't do that now. What is the closest you have ever been to a major historical event? Idk. What is a skill someone can learn in 6 months that will impress employers on a resume? Microsoft Office programs. What are some meals that are simple to make, but easy to impress people with? Idk. I know nothing of cooking. What bizarre celebrity encounters have you had? None. What is your favorite picture on the whole internet? Oh don't make me go through my Pinterest of Mark pictures. What is a “dirty little (or big) secret” about an industry that you have worked in, that people outside the industry really should know? N/A What is the most outlandish (hilarious, surprising) thing you have ever seen go down in public? OKAY SO one day otw home from my psychiatrist appointment, there was a man dressed in horrid drag walking on the side of the highway in the middle of winter. It was. An experience. If you met someone who has never heard music before (born deaf or what have you), what music would you introduce to them first? Gentle, soothing instrumental things. Like let's listen to the soft SotC pieces, please. What’s a little-known site you think everyone should know about? I don't really know of any. What is a MUST SEE movie that is highly overlooked and is on Netflix? If you don’t have a Netflix, just say in general. Johnny Got His Gun. What quote gives you chills every time you hear or read it? From Amnesia: A Machine For Pigs: "I have stood knee-deep in mud and bone and filled my lungs with mustard gas. I have seen two brothers fall. I have lain with holy wars and copulated with the autumnal fallout. I have dug trenches for the refugees; I have murdered dissidents where the ground never thaws and starved the masses into faith. A child's shadow burnt into the brickwork. A house of skulls in the jungle. The innocent, the innocent, Mandus, trod and bled and gassed and starved and beaten and murdered and enslaved. This is your coming century! They will eat them, Mandus, they will make pigs of you all and they will bury their snouts into your ribs and they will eat your hearts!" Not even mildly exaggerating, I get coooovered in goosebumps every time I come to that point in the game. I just read it twice lmao. When was the last time you bitched someone out? A while back I lost it on Mom about Dad and his wife. Have you ever given a lap dance? No. Are you afraid of plane rides? No, not really. Do you like unique or common names? Unique. Have you ever made a turkey dinner all by yourself? As if. Do you prefer running or yoga? Yoga. What continent would you most like to visit? Africa. Who do you wish you were dating? I'm happy with who I'm dating. What did you always want to do as a kid but were never allowed to do? Hm. I'm sure there's something... What is your favorite ice cream topping? Hot fudge. Is your Bible falling apart? I don't have one. Would you rather have a tail, fin, or wings? Wings. If you live in an apartment, is your landlord mean? N/A What products do you sell, if applicable? None. Is abuse in your past? No. Is there trauma in your past? Yes. Do you know anyone who’s been raped? I don't believe so, thankfully. Of the many different American accents, which one is your favorite? New Yorker. What was the last thing you watched on Youtube? Watched and not just listened to, it was an 8-BitRyan gaming vid. Do you know anyone who had a kid before they were financially stable? Probably half the people I know or more. But I think that goes for everyone. What’s your phone’s wallpaper picture? Darkiplier rip. Have you read any of Shakespeare’s works other than Romeo and Juliet? Yeah - Beowulf and Macbeth. Maybe Hamlet? Is there anything hanging from the doorknob in your room? My purse. Why did you move to where you’re living now? We got evicted and had to find something cheaper. What’s your opinion on wearing pajamas in public? Do you yourself do that? I sincerely don't care, especially if there is damage on the person's state. Like if you're suicidally depressed or very sick in another way and have to go out, don't be a fucking ass and force them to do something that can legitimately be hard for people just to appease the standards society set. A basic rule to me is never make assumptions or ask why they're in their pj's. I do it a lot, depending on where I'm going. Like you have clothes on at least, why the hell does it matter. What’s something you’re really bad at compared to others? Math. Knowing the names of cars. Giving directions and knowing where I even am in comparison to everything else. Do you know anyone who treats retail/restaurant employees poorly? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA BOY DO I but she's been removed from my life. When was the last time someone betrayed your trust? What happened? Idk. But I can say with near certainty aforementioned friend posted our entire last convo on Facebook as she'd done previously, so there's that. Do you usually fill up at the same gas station? Mom usually does. What are some odd habits you have relating to food/eating? I hate eating biscuits in front of new people because I dissect mine to parts, lol. Like I open it and eat what's in it individually, the bread being the last. Do you like Oregon Trail? I love that shit. As an adult, do you want to live in an apartment or a house? A house. Do you like the stem or leafy part of the broccoli? Stem. Do you believe in the “innocent until proven guilty” idea? Depends. Not always. Do bats frighten you? No, I love bats!!! What’s a song that reminds you of your special someone? THERE'S SO MANY!!!! Does Paris appeal to you? Yeah. Are you a KPOP fan? No. Do you believe in the phrase “if it’s meant to be, it’ll be”? Nope, bullshit. First time you kissed the last person you kissed? June 2018. Do you have to really know someone to kiss them? Absolutely. I have to actually be romantically interested in you. Well, to kiss you on the lips. Kissing family on the cheek and such is different. Were you anyone’s first kiss? No. Will you keep your last name when you get married? No, please take that shit away. Where was the last place you held hands at? I'm not sure. If you could live in any home on television what would it be? BITCH take me to the Addams' Family home. Do you think morals are universal or relative to the beliefs, traditions, or practices of individuals or groups? Mostly universal. Like just to give an example, some Christian religions forbid eating shellfish, so while avoiding shellfish is moral to you, is it really immoral to eat it? Is torture ever a good option? If no, why not? If yes, when? No. It's just... so inhuman. Regardless of what one has done, never lose your grip on being one. Be a moral human being. Don't succumb to that evil. What do you think is one one of the most undervalued professions right now? Teaching. Have you ever seen anyone have a heart attack? No, thank Christ. Have you personalized your answering machine/voicemail? No. What’s your favorite horror movie? I really love both The Blair Witch Project films, The Shining definitely joined the top tier when I watched it recently, and The Crazies is great, too. Would you say you have a high sex drive or not so much? I'd say it's normal. What was the worst thing a friend has either done or said to you? Oh boy, who knows. One of the billion things Colleen said and did. Something you feared as a kid but don’t fear anymore? Taking the last answer because it's like the #1 thing: death. It's inevitable, and immortality seems horrible. I just hope I go with the least pain possible. What is your opinion on girls who become obsessed with their boyfriends? lmaooooo been there sweetie, don't do it. Are you biracial? No. What’s the most unique pet you’ve owned? My champagne ball python. Do you have a fence? On either side and at the back of the house. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? Just my psychiatrist. I feel bad for not including Dad, but nightmares fucked me up hard. Does your family use coasters? Is anyone in your family excessively tidy? No. Do you still have your tonsils? Yep. Do you think making out is slutty? ... No...? Well, at least if you're in a relationship and love the person. Just casually doing it, quite honestly yes, I think it's slutty.

[thelifetimechannel]

The Dave and Dirk log, for obvious reasons, was something I wanted to try very hard to get right. That meant although we drafted it together via msparp, as was our custom, I ended up overhauling it way more than any of our other combo walkaround logs. A few chunks did survive the transfer, though.

In other news, we’ve made a solemn pact to finish TLC over winter break, which is good because I’m running out of bonus content. Hopefully we’ll have some assets to show off soon. I’ve already seen a few; they’re very nice.  

DIRK: Hey, dude. You did pretty well out there. DIRK: Didn't even die once. DAVE: twice in a day is my max im satisfied with keeping that record DAVE: even if getting machinegunned is rapidly becoming my "thing" DIRK: Seems we each have our respective "signature deaths". DIRK: Or at least it ain't a party until I get decapitated. That sure was something we needed to do again. DIRK: Just once, for old time's sake. DAVE: well that puts the nail in the meme coffin DAVE: any time you panic someones gonna tell you to keep your head on DAVE: like keeping your hair on except you know that shit aint going anywhere its probably shellaced DIRK: That shit is bolted to the floor. Did you know I walked around with a girly-ass pink tiara on my head this whole day and had no idea? DIRK: I had no idea. Couldn't feel a thing. DIRK: And people let me do that. DIRK: Can't fuckin' believe it. DAVE: oh DAVE: i figured you knew DIRK: I am less than pleased with my Skaia-ordained divine color scheme. DIRK: But I guess I have to live with it. It's part of the team aesthetic. DAVE: you could always change DIRK: Nah, with the tiara and tights ditched I have at least mitigated the enforced flamboyance. It's bearable. DIRK: I can't be the one dude out of uniform. Couldn't bear the shame. DAVE: my outfit is pretty sick ngl DAVE: sburb knows everyones secret desire is to have a cape DIRK: Unfortunately, mine isn't long enough to also make for a good tactical maneuver. DIRK: Not gonna lie, that was pretty funny. DAVE: if nothing else my attempts at combat can provide a source of humor in our lives DAVE: but honestly id be fine if my fighting days were over DAVE: i was never into it DAVE: rose on the other hand was obviously itching to beat people up DAVE: one of those 12 year olds who wants to get jumped in an alley to work out her suppressed anger DIRK: Maybe Skaia did make a few miscalculations in dumping your asses with your respective guardians. I think you'd get along well with Roxy and her cats, make her budget her time away from the alcohol. DIRK: ...in theory. DIRK: Rose can go a few rounds with me if she wants, we still need to sort out who has the rights to document our legendary journies. DAVE: ill plan your funeral DAVE: what kind of flowers do you want DIRK: ...there's different kinds? DAVE: damn thats right you grew up in waterworld DAVE: these choices matter DAVE: allegedly theres a thing called "flower language" DAVE: whether you can actually send someone a boquet telling them to meet you in the pit i dont know DIRK: Like, I get that, in theory, different kinds of flowers exist. But I fully anticipate any attempt on my part to conjugate in the language of said plants would end in my coffin declaring my hovercraft was indeed full of eels. DIRK: Maybe it'll have thorns on it. Or it'll be like the sixteen millions tons of green bullshit covering my land and making my nose itch. DAVE: probably DIRK: Worst case scenario, I'll pick out something orange and present to a prospective love interest and it'll mean something like "my brotherly passion for you knows no boundaries, and also no homo". DAVE: my bro wouldnt go for flower arranging DAVE: or pink tiaras DAVE: he was pretty uptight about the whole rah rah macho act DAVE: probably subscribed to alpha males weekly DAVE: which is weird considering DAVE: well DAVE: youre gay right DIRK: Uh. DIRK: Well. DIRK: My symbolic quest land is not covered in green bullshit, but I. DIRK: Happen to like watching birds, if you know what I mean. DIRK: Fuck, you probably don't know what that means. Jake and his goddamn thousand euphemisms. DAVE: cant say i do no DIRK: Nobody knows what it means but Jake. It's an old time epithet for being into dudes. DIRK: He knows all the old epithets, including some I suspect he made up. DAVE: so DAVE: thats a yes DAVE: in a roundabout way that includes birds DIRK: I've never denied it. DIRK: I'm just. DIRK: Not a huge fan of the word. Why, in this world post-society, do we need to confine ourselves to labels like "gay"? Such constraints were washed away from my world with the rest of the human race. DAVE: holy shit that was such a pretentious dodge DAVE: dont let rose hear you say that DIRK: Rose can hear all she likes. DAVE: but anyway DAVE: i wasnt asking to get up all in your business like SOME PEOPLE DAVE: who are so into getting into other peoples businesses theyre basically the fucking mafia or the irs DAVE: but DAVE: it explains some stuff DAVE: but on the other hand it doesnt DAVE: the way you raised me was kinda aggressively mainstream masculine enough that it wasnt something that ever seemed to come up as an option DAVE: [describe that type of culture and mindset better later, I KNOW what i mean but im tired rn lmao] DAVE: and anything outside of that id just brush off because it couldnt apply to me DAVE: and that went for pretty much everything that went against what you wanted for me DAVE: including that DIRK: And yet, here the man was, subconsciously shrieking his desire for floppy felt dong through, DIRK: What I guess you could call his art, for want of any other applicable word at all. God, the mental images are crawling up the insides of my skull like the Exorcist child, do I want to know? DAVE: probably not DAVE: guess trying to act peak male has its drawbacks DAVE: weirdly enough troll culture is obsessively hyperviolent but doesnt give a shit about sexuality DAVE: they dont see the difference most of the time i guess DAVE: and so like DAVE: maybe it rubs off on you because in some ways that kind of makes sense DAVE: but after so long its hard to know what i feel and what it means because i spent so long ignoring it DAVE: so i guess i was wondering DAVE: if you had anything that might help with that DAVE: or if youre also trapped in this whirling screaming maelstrom of bullshit DAVE: while kinsey sits in the eye of the storm laughing DIRK: Wait, wait, wait. DIRK: You're coming to me. DIRK: For advice. DIRK: Do you know what a laughable hurricane of disaster my interpersonal life has been? DIRK: Like, in a weird way, I'm kind of honored, especially since about five hours ago you were scared shitless to be around me, but. DIRK: I'm standing here and waving my credentials in the air just to display how I don't fucking have any. My degree is a sham and my hands are empty except for a crudely scribbled on piece of construction paper. DAVE: are you suggesting theres a gay university DAVE: where you study bird watching DIRK: Do I look like a man who's been to college? DAVE: fair DAVE: but like DAVE: your friends know DAVE: how did you broach the subject there DIRK: I might as well have been dating a Yoko Ono for the devastation it wreaked on our friend group, so yeah, it was a little hard to ignore. DIRK: Compounded by the fact some smartass from Gay University was using my social circle for romance geometry homework. DIRK: It wasn't even a love triangle so much as a love roundabout. DAVE: ok but thats just because you were a dipshit not a gay dipshit DAVE: they were chill about the first part right DIRK: Thanks. DIRK: I mean... Roxy always seemed disappointed. DAVE: luckily i dont think anyones waiting in line for me DAVE: i guess im blowing it out of proportion DAVE: i dont think anyone will MIND DAVE: no one did about rose and kanaya DAVE: didnt even question the vampire bit which goes to show what our lives are like these days DAVE: like ok our outfit has vampires now DAVE: thats a thing that we have DAVE: if i say oh hey i might be bisexual theyll just say sure pull up a chair at the acronym table DAVE: the only one who might be weird about it is john DAVE: but hed be just as weird if i told him id changed my favorite color hes just like that DAVE: the only person its really a big deal for is me DIRK: Jane was a little bit like that. I'm pretty sure the only reason she had to object was because she found out the day I made a move on her crush. DIRK: It might just be growing up in a household where you're not regularly fighting for your life, and thus what genders are kissing whom has the space to be higher on your priority list. DAVE: that aint anyones priority these days DAVE: im prepared to acknowledge the concept that hey maybe everyone elses lives dont revolve around me and my personal drama or self revelations might have some merit at least as a hypothesis DAVE: when i met kid english he kept going on about how i was the most important person and everyone else was side characters DAVE: and maybe ive acted like that sometimes DIRK: Yeah, like you alone are the one responsible for everyone around you. DAVE: and maybe ive acted like i think that way too sometimes DAVE: ive been wrong about people DAVE: people i care about people i shouldve known better DAVE: i was wrong because i wanted to believe things that matched how i wanted the world to be DAVE: things that made it easier for the story i was telling myself DAVE: i dont think kid english meant to call me on it but damn DIRK: Reality is, after all, something we construct for ourselves. DIRK: I think maybe I knew that all along when I surfaced for air inbetween shoving my head as far up my ass as it would go. DIRK: Or maybe that's just what I try to tell myself in hindsight. DAVE: well if it takes a hyperactive 12 year old version of the final bosss creepy hero worship of me to make a point i guess thats not the least subtle way the universe has sent me a message lately DIRK: You want unsubtle? Let me tell you about my damn planet quest. DAVE: haha DAVE: i didnt have to do much of my quest because im invisible DAVE: thanks mom DIRK: My denizen practically sat me down like it was my life coach and growled in my ear about improving my communication skills with a guy I told to go fuck himself not eighteen hours prior. DIRK: So while I'm glad SBURB has a vested interest in me repairing my friendships, playing electroshock death DDR with him was a little on the nose. DAVE: maybe getting shot again wasnt that bad DAVE: so weve all learned our life lessons good job team DIRK: Exactly. Can we wrap this up now? Can we please go rest? DIRK: I'm so exhausted I haven't even noticed I'm still hungover. DAVE: sure thing DAVE: but if i need tips on leaping out of a closet to intimidate passerby i might text you DIRK: I mean, I can try. As long as you don't ask me for dating tips. That, I definitely shouldn't be helping you with. DIRK: Go talk to your sister for that. DIRK: ...wouldn't she, by the transitive property of siblings, also be my sister? DAVE: yeah i guess DAVE: but theres no way in hell im asking rose for dating advice DAVE: on her first date which she refused to admit was romantically oriented she got wasted in anticipation forgot to show up and then fell down the stairs DIRK: Oh my god. DAVE: she tries to look like shes got her shit together but its a lie DAVE: if you find my corpse floating on lolar in the next few hours dont let the truth die with me DIRK: Why are we like this? DIRK: Is there actually something hardwired into our DNA that predisposes us to being disasters? DIRK: But, that aside. DIRK: I won't object if it's me you come to talk to. DAVE: ill hold you to it DAVE: and if you ever want to publicly you admit you DAVE: "enjoy birdwatching" DAVE: in less vague and evasive terms DAVE: ill have your back DIRK: Thanks.

[lightningclawedsky-official]

Late Night Ramblings

Going to bed but here are my final thoughts before I pass out

I really wanna get into sculpting- the first thing I wanna do Is make a mask that’s basically Deuce’s Swan Song mask. I know Deuce is a big ass most of the time but I do have a lot of respect for the guy admittedly- he tries his hardest to talk with his fans as much as possible. Lots of his music is good too, and he IS a bit inspiring admittedly, of course, far from ideal, but IMO he really shows that sometimes you gotta grin and bear what people think and say with you and just keep being you, no matter what you did in the past.

Danny’s mask would be fun to sculpt too, but I really wanna do this mask design I spent like 3 hours on lol. Its this 3-part stitched mask, yellow and green. Theres teeth and blood. I like teeth and blood. If I knew how, I’d love to sculpt a spring loaded jaw for the mask too. That’d be awesome, y’know, just opening your mouth and closing it while having some cool mask with it. I don’t know where I’d buy the springs. I also don’t know how to put it together... Fuck I don’t even know where I can buy decent straps for a mask, since I cant really stand the feeling on twine or elastic strings. Supplies is expensive either way- I’d have to buy 4lbs apoxie sculpt to be be safe, some tools, a strap or two, paint, sanding blocks... Its a lot.

I would love to style my hair to be like LightningClaw’s lol. Bright pink/red color, yellow streaks, hair hiding an eye. It’d be cool, but I dont have thick enough hair nor do I have the patience to wait for hair to grow back after I cut it, because I KNOW if I do cut it like LC’s, I’ll probably get bored of it.

Speaking of LC- his old design was a mess lmao. It was basically one of my other characters, Karasu, but with his signature bright ass hair, and then his yellow bangs. What a mess lol. Its also fun to see how far LC has come as a character. Before he was an edgy warriors FOC. The regular insane murderer edition (like 90% of other warriors FOCs lol.) Now he has his own comic that deals with serious issues while also having an adventreous twist with greek gods.

Tattoo’s. Tat’s are rad as fuck man. I want so many tattoos but its like putting a permanent sticker on your body and I’m not sure I can actually commit to that. Though, on the back on my neck, I plan to get LIGHTNINGCLAW written on it. LC means a lot to me and without him I don’t think I’d be where I am now, as a person, artist, and  a writer. Knuckle tats that say SHIT and FUCK would be ideal too lol but I think my family wouldn’t approve of those. t least I’m not doing drugs I guess. Could be worse. Tattoo sleeves are amazing too omg. I just really love tats and wouldn’t mind becoming a tattoo artist, but of course my dad and mom are like “that isn’t where the money is that isnt an ideal job think of the consequences if you mess up on someones body are you willing to commit to tattoos yourself blah blah blah.” Just let me figure things out. Let me try different jobs to see where I end up. I don’t want to follow any roads you two may want me to go to. I’m not going to be a doctor, nor a teacher, nor any overly common jobs. I don’t want to go into the sciences either. Thats not interesting for me. I want to go to a hands on job that I can have fun at.

Hollywood Undead is a good band and I want a new single already. Deuce is a good singer and I want that album already because Bad Attitude is the SHIT. Its awesome. I want Linkin Park to not be pop realllly badly when they drop that album- I didn’t like Heavy in the slighest. I wonder when FOb will release a song tho lol. I like music.

I’m happy to have met and known a lot of people over the years, and so many have stuck with me. I can’t believe I started on wattpad and I’m actually slowly getting somewhere. I can make commissions now, albeit it takes a bit before I can and I do a lot of trades in between, but the more art you do, the more you really get “out there” and really expand your horizons. Even then, just generally being nice to people can get you places because you ahve friendships in those places. Its nice. I’m thankful.

On the flipside, there was some people shos ultimate goal is to ruin my life, it seems. This one kid, his name is Avery, he’s an ass. I don’t get why you gotta talk shit about my back and make my life hell with you “friends” when its more like a posse or a mob. Its because of people like you I felt so lonely most of my years. Whatever rumours you and your shitgang of minions said about me completely stained me as a person and I don’t even know what you said. Say shit to my face so I can punch it back into your mouth you stale fruitcake. If I took a shot everytime someone said I wasn’t like how you or your friends said I was, and that I was actually *gasp* NICE; I’d have fucking alchohol poisoning and need to get my stomach pumped out. Its happened way too much and I swear, when I graduate, I’m gonna meet you somewhere and punch your face so hard your grandchildren (though I doub’t you’ll have any with a personality like yours) will be able to feel it. I don’t know why you think you are entited to treat someone like shit but its all for the wrong reasons you fuckwad.