#i just unfollowed someone cuz they kept being really

[goremet-chef]

some of yall are weirdos for real like....

im of the firm belief that if someone doesnt outright ASK for criticism, dont give it to them? you'll just hurt someone whos not ready to hear what you have to say. they could be a beginner, could have tried VERY hard, could be proud of what they created, let them feel like they did something because they did???? i genuinely dont understand the need to like. COMPLAINN about someone elses creations its so weird man

DOUBLY, its SO weird to treat fanfics as if yr an actual writing critic?? like im not saying fanfics arent like 'REAL' writing cuz they absolutely are but... usually its just some dude doing something theyre passionate about, like.

ive read fanfic that was messy, ive read fanfic that has spelling mistakes, ive read fanfic that has weird format, but i still enjoyed them? because im not here to give a fucking book review, im here to read about my favorite characters SKJFSF

if you dont like what someone else has made, the back button is right there! shocking, i know. sometimes i have opened fics and been like yeah im not a big fan ill dip and thats okay cuz everyone has different taste. but when you as a person start shitting on said fanfic just cuz YOU didnt like it??? yr fuckin weird. yr JUST being mean

[hualian-blessing]

tw// grooming allegations

about the dream allegations? im sorry but i cant fully believe amanduh's case because she has so many holes in her story to the point that she's also destroying her own case as well. i had a talk with my friend who was groomed for years and they told me what a victim usually acted when sharing their story.

i cant say if the victims should act like that all the time when exposing someone for grooming but it was really sus that she wasn't, uh how should i say this, emotional i guess???

(edit: i phrased that so bad but what im trying to say is that everyone has a different reactions to grooming but from amanduh's video, (i showed it to my friend after so that they'll the one who will judge her instead of me) both my friend and i noticed how she doesn't really put her heart into it in a sense? it's along that line technically but still not all victims have the same reaction as my friend.)

other than that, a lot of people were pointing out how the math ain't mathing with the story.

first, she said that she was turning 18 when dream texted her and allegedly started sexting her but in one of her tweets, she said that she just turned 17 last year. which is really confusing and downright idiotic if she lied about her age.

second, she said that she was with her boyfriend during the years 2020 to 2021 thus she stopped texting dream at that time range. but here's what confused me, she herself said that her and her boyfriend met at april 2022 tho??? someone might ask "but bella, this boyfriend might be the different one!!!" no, she didn't have an ex. she could have explicitly said "ex", "ex boyfriend" or "current boyfriend at that time" and her boyfriend confirmed that he was already with her when the dream situation happened.

third, she was still following dream up until today when people noticed that she made that post but still kept up to date with his life happenings in twitter. in fact, she was defending and liking posts about dream's face reveal no less than a week and few days ago. if she was a victim of his grooming, shouldn't she unfollowed and blocked him in all of his social media platforms??? make it make sense. (photos aren't mine, i forgot who the user is because of the sheer idiocy i witnessed).

fourth, she tried to get keemstar of all people to cover her case instead of going to literal lawyers if she wanted everyone to hear her and the "victims" voices. if she really want to make a credible case, she should hold her cards close to her chest instead of showcasing the evidences in the internet before she could even take legal actions against dream. it's literally the best and most logical action she could have done instead of this.

fifth, she already has a record of being...weird online?? like this photo for example is literally just crazy for me to read...i literally can't take face value if she's like this.

i also saw people how the first girl before amanduh already admitted that her claims were fake and i wont be surprised if this one is fake as well. look im not a die hard fan or a stan of dream but i do watch his content and my friend (from earlier) does so as well, and they're downright pissed at this situation because these girls might have destroyed the chances for actual victims of grooming to speak up about their own situations. all for what? clout? it disgusted me and my friend to see people using this serious matter for something so cruel and malicious. i used to believe on the "believe the victim first and foremost" but after the amber heard case and then this, i would be more on "listen and criticize if the victim's claims are true".

to the girls who made these claims and proven to be false, i hope you have a fun time in hell after all of this.

but if it was ever proven that dream literally did it, then i'll retract my statement and remove myself from the internet to reflect.

either way, only time will tell and i hope everything clears up.

edit: no way is amanda fr rn. cuz holy fuck the story is so messy right now, first with avril then anna. and i saw accounts saying amanda did the same thing to sapnap, bad, skeppy and boomer before and im like wtf is going on???

[destinyc1020]

Could you explain further why you think that tom was the dumper?

I just want to see if our thinking matches

Oooof....So many things....so many things lol..... GIRL!😅

Get yourself some wine (or hot cocoa lol) and pull up a chair, cuz it's a LOT.....

Here are some of my reasons for why I suspect (I don't know for sure obviously) that Tom was the one to initiate the breakup:

Zendaya was still wearing Tom's shirt and watch around the FFH press tour/premiere time (if YOU were the dumper, why on earth would you rub salt in the wound and do that??)

She accidentally said "cuddling with my boyfriend" when talking about her "perfect day" on the red carpet (again...did you FORGET that YOU were the one who broke up with your bf?? OR.... lol😅 )

Z seemed blind-sided by the Tolivia pics, but at the same time she made it seem like she didn't want people thinking that Tom had cheated on her.

The fact that she got with JE AFTER Tom was spotted with Olivia (not beforehand 👀). If Z had dumped Tom, why didn't SHE get with someone else before him?? Usually you don't just wake up one day saying "Oh, I'm going to dump my bf of 2 years!" No..this stuff has been brewing... So if you were the initiator, it's cuz you've been thinking about it for a WHILE lol. But Tom got with someone else before she did. Then, she herself decided to move on and started dating JE. This is precisely why I don't think anything "funny" was going on btwn her and JE prior to the Tolivia pics hitting the internet. I think JE saw them and reached out to HER. If he had known she was single long time ago, he would have reached out long time ago right?? He would have dumped Cari long before August right?? 👀

Z had bought a keyhole neckchain for Tom and he started wearing it during the London FFH photocall thingy. Now, if YOU dumped a guy, why would you be gifting him jewelry?? Unless, you had already ordered it beforehand, and it was custom-made for him and you decided to give it to him anyway?

Then there was this tea from someone close to Z:

Now, I'm not saying you cant' be "heartbroken" when you're the dumper in a broken relationship (you can be!), but the way this was worded, it made it seem like Z was heartbroken that things didn't work out btwn them....

Another thing is, Z didn't even dump Trevor who was cheating behind her back lol. You really think she dumped Tom who is the nicest, most upstanding guy she's ever been with?? For WHAT exactly?? LOL You've seen how MUSH she is with him.... We never saw it before cuz they kept it behind closed doors. But now that we see how "girlfriend Daya" is, and we know how sweet Tom is, you really think she said: "You know what.... I just think we need to breakup"? 😅

Then, there was THIS "tea" that an Anon spilled to me. I use the term "tea" VERY loosely here, because who knows if it's even true??? I just know that supposedly there were TWO versions of the "Audrey" tea that was being told around.... This version actually makes the most sense to me...

Another thing that always struck me as odd is the fact that I feel like Tom must have reached out to Z when those NYC/Jacdaya pics came out. Cuz they were still trying to be relatively "friendly" up until then on social media (trying to act like nothing was wrong/different lol), and then BAM! After that!??? Whew chiiiilllle..... Tom unfollowed Darnell and Deja.... Then from that point on, Z paid Tom DUST! 🤣 Tom is definitely the more impulsive one, so I feel like he probably also impulsively initiated the breakup also. I don't think that if Z were the one who broke up with TOM that he would have been hitting the fan so hard at those pics. He would have been like, "Well....she's moved on...she dumped me....". The fact that he was so bold in probably contacting her is because he deep down must have known that she still loved him. He knew he wasn't the initiator of the breakup in other words. Just my hunch.

Tom's "I broke my heart myself" comment seems very obvious that it wasn't HIM who was dumped.

Tom also initiated his breakups with Elle, Olivia, AND Nadia. 👀👀  

Tom's reaction to the Tolivia pics in the GQ interview was also very telling. If you were the one who was DUMPED, why are you worried if people caught you with another woman? Yea, sure okay....maybe it's the first time your little fans have seen you with a woman before lol...but still. He seemed disturbed. I think it's because he knew that once those pics got out, there was no turning back now on Zendaya's end. 🤣

Then even when he reached out to her for the Emmy nod, yet again I got the impression that he felt like HE needed to be the one to ammend things. I feel like if Z had been the dumper, SHE would have been the one trying to get on HIS good graces, not the other way around.

Anyway......

I know some Anons HATE It when I bring up the exes or post these post, but it's the best way I can consolidate what happened around that time, and I added all of the tea and receipts from around that era so that I didn't have to keep repeating myself lol. 🤣

Some other reading for your enjoyment if you want to get more backstory.....

TL;DR Version: We obviously don't know for sure, so all of this is just speculation. I just haven't seen strong enough evidence to lead me to the belief that Z was the one to initiate the breakup. And sad to say?? I actually think Tom had more reasons to initiate a breakup than Z did lol...

[hotchs-big-hands]

https://www.tumblr.com/hotchs-big-hands/729287103786188800/is-it-petty-that-i-unfollowed-someone-cuz-they

I don’t think it’s petty! Like you said, everyone is free to have their own opinions and to follow/unfollow people as they please (unless they remove you as a follower first) :)

I will say that it kind of sounds like we’re on the same side, though? Aaron could have tried to figure out the work/life balance, and Haley could try to see his side of things/assist with finding that balance. Neither of them called it sooner, because they didn’t stop loving each other at any point and they just kept trying to make it work. No one is saying that either of them are 100% innocent or 100% guilty.

The problem is in people loudly hating Haley; not hating her as a person. Rather, hating her as someone who wasn’t content to play ignored housewife for the rest of her life while constantly worrying about her husband getting killed at work or something, and someone who spoke up about being unhappy with the situation

Everyone’s got their opinions. Mine is that Haley has the right to want a present partner/husband/father of her child, especially after having him be present for literal decades before that, and I’m simply against the opinion that she’s some godawful bitch for asking for that

Omg noooo I didn't expect you to see this :((( I'm rly sorry abt this! I'm embarrassed now KDKDKD

I get your points tho! I think like you can either love her or hate her, the two of them weren't made to be together in the end which is sad cuz they obvs were extremely and deeply in love. I just think they really shoulda had a big talk abt what he wanted and what she wanted long ago, way before marriage. Maybe when he was going to law school. He was never going to have an easy lifestyle with the job he wanted, he shoulda been more firm abt this fact. And Haley shoulda been more forward and kind to herself with the fact that she wants more time with him, someone she knows is going to come home at a reasonable hour, and eventually when they had Jack, someone to be a parent too. But it just didn't happen. And so idk I just think that they were both wrong in the end. Aaron isn't a bad person for wanting to do what he's doing, Haley isn't a bad person for wanting what she wants. Both are bad for not communicating and staying in this marriage.

I guess what bothered me was calling fans misogynistic for hating her ? I suppose maybe some of the extreme haters could be but it's not really something I should get into.

Anyway tho I didn't expect you to reach out and now I feel like a clown unfollowing sksksksksk I'm sorry about this! I really hope NO ONE goes to your dms/asks/mentions or the op of the post's to send shitty comments and just generally be a cunt abt this. It's all fiction, we shouldn't attack one another over it. Differing opinions is just how the world works!

Anyway, I hope you're having a good day and again I'm very sorry about this!!!

[andi-kook]

Omg I was in a kind of situationship too 😭 it was around a year ago. Him and I were friends from fifth grade, and he was one of my first male friends. I had a crush on him back then but I never told him that. and he had surprisingly confessed that he too had a crush on me. But I still didn't tell him cuz I was too afraid and we were just too young for this shit lol.

However the next year I broke things off with my friend group and since he was also good friends with them, I thought he probably wouldn't want to talk to me anymore. So I decided to stay away from him from then onwards. And then covid happened too, which made it impossible to have any communication in person.

Fast forward to a few years later, he reached out to me on Instagram and we started chatting day and night about so many things. We cleared up misunderstandings like I thought he didn't want to do anything with me anymore and he thought my mom (a teacher in our school lol) forbade me from talking to him. He also started low-key flirting with me, complimenting here and there and saying corny shit 😂. However, a few months later his responses started getting dry and would keep me on sent for a long time. I didn't realize I was literally embarrassing myself by texting even after he once kept me unseen for days. He gradually ghosted me like that and a couple of months later unfollowed me.

Now he claims in front of his friend (that friend is my friend too) that he was just playing around and thought I got the hint. When he "realized I was quite serious about whatever was going on" he decided it was best to just ghost me. It's just funny now how he completely claims he never liked me when the things he'd say to me were so contradictory. It's been like a year now, I don't like him anymore but still feel hurt whenever I remember things.

Anyways sorry did I bore you with all this? Lol I didn't realize how much I wrote, got carried away 😭 sorry skip this if you want lol 😭😭

-💗

nooo you didn’t bore me!! i’m grateful you sent this in, lovely 💗!!!

ghosting someone is such a coward move for me. if you don’t think you’re going to work out, just say so. you owe that person that much especially if you’ve spend a significant amount of time with them that disappearing from their life, without any explanation as to why, will really affect them in a way that is indescribable. people who ghosts instead of just being honest are cowards!!!!

i’m sorry you had to go through that :( he sounds like an asshole my god and it’s worst because you considered him a friend before anything else. i definitely could relate to the whole instagram thing – that’s where my situationship started too – and going from talking to each day in and day out to just .... nothing. in hindsight, that really should have been our sign but alas, love is blind.

and fuck, him changing narratives to your friend????? SAME. he also claimed that i was the only one who liked him when he was the one who pursued me. that really broke my heart and the cherry on top was that i found that out through this other girl he was talking to while he was gradually ghosted me. that really gave me extreme anxiety on top of my already existing one and i always dreaded going to our campus and coming across them – even on social media which i don’t use anymore besides tumblr.

i’m proud of you for saying you don’t like him anymore. i wish i can say the same thing. the pain from a situationship is really greater than most because we don’t get any explanation why it ended. it just did. and when you do get an explanation, you’re fucking gaslighted beyond belief hahaha. it’s insane how a person can do that to another human being.

i really hope we heal from this unnecessary character development, 💗. i hope we never experience this again. we really don’t deserve it and i hope we realize that again and again until it’s etched in our brains.

may they never know peace every time we appear in their life whether through a dream, a song, a scent, a place, or when they simply go about their day.

[sukirichi]

— 💌 ; a love letter from @kyriaan

long post below regarding broken records. cw includes adultery, physical assault, toxic relationships, broken records spoilers, and mature content

[ from the ask ] BROKEN RECORDS ; track 005

Okay! I finally had time to actually sit down and properly read chap 5 cause ill be damned and burned if i dont pay special attention to one of my favorite series here! Rather drown or be sting by bees slowly 😒

🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙃 I for the first time don't even know where to start so allow me to be all over the place cause my emotions are also all over the place with this chapter ✌️

Ill start by y/n's dad caN GO FUCK HIMSELF? Like okay sir you might have fallen in love with our mom (ill give him the benefit of the doubt regarding his feelings) BUT SIR YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN HONEST? FROM THE BEGINNING? ALSO BRUH YOU KIDDING ME??? SIR YOU LEGIT ABANDONED YOUR OTHER DAUGHTER AND THEN YOU PROCESS TO 'LEAVE US' I- YOOOOO I WOULD BITCH SLAP HIM I SWEAR!!

Also ALSO ILL SCREAM FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK NO KID HAS EVER TO BE BLAMED FOR BEING BORN!! Y/n mom's line: 'we have to atone for our sins' its legit BULLSHIT it wad NOT y/n fault her DAD COULDNT KEEP HIS DICK INSIDE HIS PANTS NOR ITS Y/N FAULT THAT HER DAD CHEATED!!! ATONE FOR OUR SINS MY ASS!! the father is the one that has to take responsibility for all this shitty situation we do NOT nor any kid out there in this situation has to be taken accountable by this!!

And now Suna 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 bruh im just gonna cry... Everything he does just makes me heart swell i feel so cozy when i read his parts like how sweet and present he is I- bruh I never had that... Actually seeing y/n breaking up with him when shes clearly falling in love with him just breaks me cause Girl for real Suna would be there for you... I get it shes afraid and shes acting on that fear but girl... Pls he truly loves you deeply not everyone is like your dad. There are happy endings. There are good people Sunas one of them pls 🥺🥺🥺 also MY LOVE TSUMU BEING A SUPPORTIVE FRIEND EVEN THO SUNA GOT THE GIRL BRUH TSUMU I FUCKING LOVE YOU MY CHILDISH YET ADORABLY SMUG BOY 😭😭😭😭😭

Nagisas a bitch btw ✌️ so far i see no redemption not excuse in what she did so far. I get her reasons but that does NOT excuse her behavior. She has to lash out at her cunt of a dad not at a innocent woman who was also a victim all along. Nor even her half sister. I get her mentality behind this but doesnt excuse her behavior at all- its basically the same as being a victim from a bully and playing bully after aswell.

Overall YOU MADE ME CRY AGAIN SUKI! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS BUT ALSO UGH MY HEART SUKI!

[ from suki ] 

BROKEN RECORDS IS UR FAVE SERIES??? babe pls you’re gonna me cry !! nah nah fr his dishonesty caused all this mess. YEAHA SAKLAA tbh I love mama lucy but her words of ‘atoning for their sins’ or her mindset of ‘we don’t deserve to be happy when we’ve hurt others’ really messed up YN. she was only 21 and vulnerable with all the shambles happening in her family + the sudden assault from nagisa, that when her mother said those words, she struggled to let go of it. to her, it became like a final verdict that dictated how she lived her life.

SUNA URGHHH PLEASE GIVE SUNA A CHANCE HE HAS PURE AND GOOD INTENTIONS BUT I CANT BLAME HER EITHER AHSJAKA. and the comparison of nagisa being a bully’s victim only to become the next bully is true. nagisa should lash out at their shitty excuse of a father. ALSO AAAAHH THE NEXT CHAPTER (007) IS WORSE AHSJKAAL

[ from the ask ] BROKEN RECORDS ; track 005

I know shins attractive I mean mans perfect?? Does he even have any flaw?? And the way he cried when he got his jersey MYGOD FHDHFHFJSKS but I still look at him and im like.... Hmmmm nah i wouldnt date him its just not my... Do i dare say type? Cause i dont think i have a type ghfhfisofbd but like I just 🧍‍♀️

I love him i just dont love him i guess

The makeout scene tho ill give you that 🥵🥵🥵 made me bark (i would still walk out next day like was a good fuck kita byeeee🚉🏃‍♀️💨)

... More drama regarding mari... And you said this will have like 10 chapters... And from 8 on will be angsty.... 🙂 *traumatized noises*

[ from suki ] 

YUUHHH KITA IS PERFECT HERE AHSJKAA IDK MAYBE ITS MY SIMPING FOR NAOYA CONVERTED TO KITA ALREADY BEING PERFECT AS HE ALREADY IS AND I AMPED IT UP BCOS THE SIMP MODE IS ACTIVATED AHSKAA. the make out scene !! pls sir i’m on my knees spare some love in ur heart AAAAAAHHHHHH. also. i assure you. businessman! kita got game. he’s gonna make you walk funny if you give him the chance HSJKA

yeah i just finished writing the outline for track7 right now and the drama is HSJKAA it gave me a headache sobs 

[ from the ask ] BROKEN RECORDS ; track 006

I want to give you my usual thoughts on the new chapter and at the same ahm...

I just saw myself on Suna... Deeply....and it kinda slapped me harder than i was expecting...there were too many things from him giving himself to mari/treating her like he wants to be treated... To deleting his best friend from social media thanks to his girlfriend... And it really hurt me ahah..

I would vent but.. Yeah

But yes this chapter i saw myself in suna and i had to take quite the long breaks cause it was getting to me 😅😅😅 also if anything i learned from my experiences is that MARI SCREAMS RED FLAGS and even Osamu can see that pls

I would honestly end Mari there, i wouldnt even bother to just retort i would walk my way into to the damn apartment and fucking take Suna for myself cause Mari does not deserve him. Shes manipulative, and in a way abusive.. Not allowing him to keep contact with his best friend his a total redflag and o know its because Suna had feelings for y/n and vice versa but Suna never gave het a reason to distrust him.

The moment he said he was best friends with y/n and was single she immediately clinged himself to him and for what? To then dump him like he was trash...

He gave himself to her, he proved he was there for her he even took her back this boy deserves the fucking world and its not Mari...

I kinda want to say it's not y/n at this point either cause the way she broke his heart was kinda the same Mari did.. Y/n disregarded his feelings and just broke it up.. Mari disregarded his feelings abd broke it up... But y/n stated from the very beginning that she would eventually break up Mari just shrugged and didn't care so i can in a way forgive y/n i cant forgive mari

Besides y/n was supportive from the beginning while Mari was obsessive and controlling.

Another really insanely well written chapter as usual (albeit this one making me ball my eyes off harder because yeah) but yes~ eagerly waiting for the next one~

Take your time tho 😌🙌

Mari can go fuck off 💗💓💞💕❣️❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍💯💝💖💋💅

Suna x y/n pls

Y/n deserves to have a healthy love life with someone she loves (hence why npt Kita) and loves her back

And Suna deserve the fucking world and be treated right

[ from suki ] 

NAHHHH cuz when you said suna was treating mari the way he wanted YN to treat her... that’s right. on point. they’re all so complicated sobs. MARI IS A WALKING RED FLAG THAT OSAMU CAN SMELL FROM A MILE AWAY. ALSO yes mari is manipulative and borderline possessive when it came to suna. like yeah, let’s be real, she could tell a long time ago that suna was in love with YN and it made her insecure / jealous, but the whole time, YN kept her distance. she was supportive over their relationship from afar as to make mari comfortable. suna also did everything he could to make sure she was well cared for. for three years, he was focused on her and only her. he gave love a second chance despite being brokenhearted. suna never mari a chance to doubt because he, too, was sure he could be happy with her.

until mari left him.

and now suna is back with YN because they will always have each other. but honestly,,,if we think about it, if mari never broke up with suna or at least gave him the chance to explain himself - if mari didn’t do the exact thing YN did to suna years ago - he honestly would’ve been really happy with mari. they were going well. like yeah mari has always been toxic by pushing suna’s boundaries and asking him to unfollow his own best friend on social media, but he did it anyway. because he trusted their relationship. he wanted the best for them. 

also yeah, the parallels between mari and YN were intentional !! 

HEHEHEHE THE KITA X YN SHIP everyone loves them im so happy about that bcos kita is so amazing in my eyes. PREACH FOR THAT THO !! SUNA DESERVES THE BEST. SUNA DESERVES TO BE TREATED RIGHT. HE DESERVES THE WORLD AND SO MUCH MORE

thank you for taking the time to send me this, kya, it means a lot to me and it motivates me to work harder on the future chapters !! <33

[flamediel]

Hi so im kinda new to the fandom and i see all this drama on your blog, which is lovely and great you seem so nice, can you help me with like getting a lil up to date with all cuz i love drama and it seems messy

Ahhh welcome to the fandom! I'm glad you like my blog. This is gonna be a quick summary bc I need to sleep and if you have any specific questions lmk and ill get to those in the morning. putting these in categories by who its about

Chris/joel drama:

Ok, so around two years ago, joel started dating this girl emilia. They broke up about six months ago and joel posted online saying it was really toxic and hurt him a lot. At the time he was hanging around chris a lot and we kind of got the vibe chris helped him through the breakup. Chris was also one of the people who unfollowed emilia at the time, not all the boys did that. Everything was chill for a while, then the day the hero music video was supposed to come out, someone (samantha camara) posted a video from Joel's close friends story where he was hanging out with this girl sam sanchez and they looked all couply. Thing is.. sam s is Chris's ex, so people were mad. Personally I think its pr bc hero was coming out that night and sam s was releasing music, so the timing was toooooo good. Also sam s and c are still really good friends (they were hanging out today) which wouldn't be the case if she had exposed a relationship that was supposed to be private. This all is lowkey for a while, the guys seem to be close in the vlogs and content we get, then last night Chris flowed emilia again. Right after that, joel posted sam s on his story. One theory is this is them being petty and fighting, but sam s is releasing music the same day deja vu comes out so I just think (or hope) its more pr. Thats the gist of this

Erick: ok so erick was seeing this girl nadia mualem for a while. She was in the de cero music video (his girl) and a few others i think (pretend for example). We didn't see them together a lot but we knew they were hanging out bc she was always posting hinting about it. He took her to cancun this summer for example, and when she's in miami she'll post stories that are obviously from his house and stuff. Recently they unfollowed each other.on insta and people thought they might have broken up. Then she posted in miami but she was staying in a hotel which confused people bc she never did that before. Someone asked her if they broke up on tiktok and she answered like this:

This was super out of character bc she's always shoving the relationship in people's faces, so suddenly acting like its private is sus. Imo this and the hotel is definite proof they broke up or at least are fighting/on bad terms. Erick is a huge fuckboy anyway so I doubt he committed.

Richard: speaking if fuckboys.. OK, so you know how I mentioned that erick took nadia to cancun? Richard went too, with a girl named Olivia wong. No one had seen olivia before so we thought she was just a one time hookup he met at the club, but then people did some digging and found that she was at their NYE performance in times square the year before. This was kind of big bc his mom also attended the performance, so if olivia was there w him she met his mom. It also implied they had been together for a while. We didn't see much of olivia after that, but bc we only saw her once it was implied they were still seeing each other. Then the beso video dropped, and Richard started reposting his beso model (doug, idr her last name rn) all over his instagram. Still, he and Olivia kept following each other so all seemed chill. Then in the middle of December olivia posted a tiktok at the airport saying she was gonna go surprise her bf and he dumped her right before. She later said the situation had been "updated" in a comment but all we saw was a text conversation w a contact named "king" where he sent her the tiktok and was like "ouch you were gonna surprise me 🤕🥴" or whatever emoji the fuckboys use these days idk. In the tiktok olivia just responded w "Ig we'll never know" and thats basically all we saw of her. BUT she never unfollowed him so idk. Then, days later, doug is EVERYWHERE. She's in the vid of Richards fam wishing him happy birthday, talking to aaliyah, and she seems really close w all of them. AFAIK she's the only hookup to meet his daughter (other than yocelyn ofc). This is kind of sus bc this was RIGHT after the thing w olivia, so why is he bringing another girl to meet his family? Idk man, in my opinion there was definitely some two timing going on, but this is all we have for now.

Ok, I think that's all of it. Im sorry if this is confusing, just send me more messages if you have other questions. For now tho, gn lovessss

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #384

“watch your tongue or have it cut from your head”

Do you post to say happy birthday on other people’s walls? Sometimes. Depends on my mood and the person. When was the last time you saw a rainbow? Idr. What’s your favorite television commercial? I don't watch TV enough at all to have one. And who has a favorite commercial, anyway? Do you trip a lot? I don't really trip a lot, but kinda fumble over my footing and stray a bit. I'm horrible at walking straight, and it's gotten worse as my legs have. How old is your television? The one in the living room is god knows how old. My parents were still together when they bought it. When did you last talk on the phone with someone? A couple days ago for my appointment with my psychiatrist. Are you currently sleepy? I'm quite convinced I'm permanently tired. Are you hot or cold natured? I am ALWAYS fucking hot, ugh. Do you take any advanced classes? I took mostly Honors classes in school. Do you have weak upper body strength? My body is just weak as a whole. What is the worst insult someone can call you? Emotionally weak. Are you good at sketching? If we're talking meerkats, haha. They're the only complex thing that I can freehand no problem without needing a reference, honestly. Ever play Angry Birds? Nah. I thought the movie was cute, though. Have you ever been to the zoo before? Yeah. Has anyone ever been weirdly obsessed with you? No. Are you afraid someone might steal your identity someday? It's not something I actively worry about at all. Like, you don't want my identity, I promise. Do you have any talents that come naturally? Growing up, adults always told me I was a "gifted" artist and writer. Also that I seem to have an unnaturally strong connection with animals. I've always been that person where a pet's owner is like "omg ____ never lets people do that" and whatnot. Have you ever had plastic surgery before? I haven't. It's funny though, how opposed to it I used to be... Like goddamn, I was such a fucking stupid and honestly judgmental teenager, regarding many things. I look back on her and cringe. Like damn dude, if you have a safe surgical procedure to help you enjoy the body you're stuck with the rest of your life, you go for it, boo. Are you afraid of airplane rides? Not really. What’s the best Valentine’s Day gift you’ve gotten? There was this one year where Jason had to go to work on Valentine's Day and I was super bummed, yet he still surprised me with a heart-shaped box of chocolates, roses, and a game I really wanted, Heavy Rain. I thought it was the sweetest. What is something you lose often? My phone. ;-; Do you enter a lot of sweepstakes? I don't enter any. Do you consider yourself physically active? *chuckles nervously* Do you have Netflix? Yeah. Favorite salad dressing? That Olive Garden replica you can buy at the store. Do you enjoy dancing? Once upon a time I did. My body could never handle it now. Have you ever considered writing a novel? Many times. Snow or sand? Snow, by twenty thousand miles. It is VERY hard for me to walk through sand, and I also hate hate hate hate HATE the sensation. Do you like sour candy? Heeeeeell yeah man. Have you gotten any injuries lately? If so, what & how? Nothing notable. Are you a clumsy person? Like you would not fucking believe. Last male you talked to in person? I think my primary physician's nurse. Are you thinking about asking anyone out? No. Pink lemonade or regular lemonade? Pink lemonade, for sure. But I love both. Chocolate or strawberry milk? CHOCOLATE. Strawberry milk is disgusting. Have you ever won a contest on the radio?No. Is there a song that reminds you of your best friend? There's quite a few. Has a book ever made you cry? Yes. Do you automatically check your phone when you wake up? Yes, for the time. Do you know anyone who has a pet bunny? Not that I'm aware. What store or website would you most like a gift card for? Rebel's Market. How do you feel about wolves? I adore wolves. Beautiful, majestic creatures with very interesting social dynamics. Name your top 3 favorite musical instruments. Electric guitar, violin, piano. What was the last book(s) you bought at a bookstore? At an actual bookstore, I think it was The Fault In Our Stars, which I never actually read. Do you use Pinterest? Yes. Do you know any sign language? No. Do you have a favorite poem? No. Do you have a dog? No. The one we were pretty much stuck with has a home now. Have you ever read The Little House on the Prairie series? I haven't. Have you ever gone on a service trip to an underprivileged country? No. Have you ever performed in front of more than 100 people? Yes, for dance. When (if ever) was the last time you went to church? Forever ago, I don't even remember the last time. What's a quote you think is really powerful? There's a whole lot. The first one that came to mind was, "An eye for an eye will leave the world blind," which I do believe has great depth in it. Have you ever had to do your laundry at a laundromat? Yes. Are you the oldest person who lives in your household? No. My mom is turning 60 (... I think?) this year. If you have tattoos, how long have you had them? I got my first the day I turned 18. Do you and your dad have similar personalities? We're alike in some ways, imo most notably in that we have NO fucking common sense, embarrassing as that is to admit. We're both kinda slow at understanding things, too. What were the last three things you had to drink? Mountain Lightning, milk, and water. What did your family usually do for Easter when you were a kid? Us three kids all got Easter baskets full of stuff, and we'd go egg-hunting when we were all awake. My little sister Nicole would always wake our parents up in excitement, haha. My parents hid plenty throughout the house, and there was always this one "special" egg that was actually from Mom's childhood and was extremely intricate and beautiful. You basically "won" the hunt if you found it, and it was extremely well-hidden. When you have house guests over, where do they sleep? Historically since living here, my two half-sisters and their spouses (the only people who've stayed over) slept in what is *technically* Mom's room, but for whatever reason this woman still insists on sleeping on the couch in the living room, I guess because she's used to it after all the years she didn't have her own room and bed. Are you emotionally stable? LOLOOLOLOOLLOLOOLOOLOLLOOLOLLLLLLLLLLL Do you still talk to the very first person you had sex with? No. Are you an atheist? No. I don't quite know how to define what I am, but since I believe there's SOME higher power, I don't think it's fitting to call me an atheist. What’s the largest bug you’ve ever found in your house? Hm... I'm unsure. Probably a male mosquito, 'cuz them bitches are big'ins. Would it annoy you if a stranger called you "sweetie?" If it was a man, I'd be creeped out. Are you into fashion design? Not really. What’s the worst thing you’ve gone through in the past year? My leg muscles continuing to degrade, honestly. I have to do something about this shit. How did you get your last bruise? I fell when stepping over the stupid dog gate. Have your parents ever forgotten your birthday? Yikes, no. Would you rather have some bacon or beef jerky? Bacon. Do you like your orange juice with lots or no pulp? NONE. Do you wear skinny jeans? Back when I wore jeans, they were the only kind I wore. What projects are you doing now for school? I'm outta school. What’s the most number of comments you have on a Facebook picture? What is the picture of? I have no idea. Do you like coconut flavored things? No. Have you ever met a famous author before? No. Do you know anybody who has been raped before? No, thank god. I know someone who might've almost been, though. I don't know what the fucking pig was going to do to her if my sister and I weren't there. Have you ever wished for bigger boobs? No. Being overweight, I just want smaller ones now, haha. Have you ever gone a full day without interacting with another person? I've gone many days without it. How many relationships have you been in that lasted less than a year? Four, if you're counting everyone that had the "boyfriend" title. Where were you going the last time you were on a plane? Home from Illinois. Where were you going the last time you were on a train? I've never been on one. Have you ever been significantly more physically fit than you are now? Holy fuck, yes. You would never guess now that I was perfectly healthy in high school especially, yet I still thought I was kinda fat. It hurts so much to look back on. When growing up, did you parents keep the house very tidy? I mean not excessively, but Mom was pretty dedicated to keeping the house in decent condition. With three kids though, of course the house was somewhat messy with toys and all. When you shop at IKEA, do you always stop to eat a snack/meal in the cafeteria? ... There's a fucking cafeteria in a furniture store? o_o I've never been there before. How many watches do you own? None, save for one in my "treasure box" from when I was a kid. I was SO SO SO obsessed with Finding Nemo that I kept my broken one. I did the same with my horribly aged sneakers, like the soles were coming off and Mom finally made me stop wearing them, ha. Are there any ways in which you greatly differ from everyone else in your family? I do fucking nothing and am useless to society. Should teenagers be allowed to have their cell phones with them in class? Yes, because emergencies happen. I personally think it's best to maybe have your cell phone flipped over on the corner of your desk or something and on vibrate, that way the noise isn't too disruptive and the teacher can see you're not just using it for other purposes. Do you have any gay relatives? Yes. Have you ever had to have a pet put down? Sigh, multiple. Have you unfollowed, deleted, or blocked anyone on social media recently? If so, what was the reason? Not recently. How many cups of coffee do you typically drink per day? None. Do you know what your vocal range is? No, but it's not very broad. What’s the biggest financial mistake you’ve ever made? I haven't been in this position before. Have you ever been in a relationship where there was a large difference in maturity levels? No. What’s the longest you’ve ever stayed as a guest at someone’s house? I wanna say over a month while we were technically homeless. How bad was your acne when you were a teenager? Oh dear, it was rough. Like there were people who had it worse than me, but ya girl was lookin preeeetty rough lmao.

[artxmisery]

doing this for tma since thats sadly the only one i know enough about to get anything out of your answers. salty asks: 1, 2, 3, 4, 9, 11, 26, 27

1: any otps you just don't get? not really? idk, anyone outside of the main cast ig, they just don't have enough time to get a sense of their personalities and thus good ships

2: any otps you only brotp? none of the popular ones, no

3: have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion? nope

4: do you have a notp? not really

9: most disliked character(s)? i hate annabelle cain bc web sucks and i hate michael crew bc he's a little bitch

11: is there an unpopular character you like? elias (although he's not a sexyman either he's just a good character)

26: most shippable character? ssssasha??? idk lol

27: least shippable character? JURGEN LEITNER?

STUPID IDIOT MOTHERFUCKING JURGEN LEITENER GOD DAMN FOOL BOOK COLLECTING DUST EATING RAT OLD BASTARD SHITHEAD IDIOT AVATAR OF THE WHORE BIGGEST CLOWN IN THE CIRCUS LAUGHED OUT OF TOWN COWBOY MOTHERFUCKING JURGEIN LEITNER

STOP PINNING ME WHEN I TALK ABOUT JURGEIN LEITENER I HATE HIM SO MUCH WHY DOES HE HAVE SO MANY FUCKED UP BOOKS WHY DID HE DECIDE TO FUCK AROUND AND FIND OUT JUST SET THEM LOOSE IS HE DEAD IS HE A BASTARD MAN HAS SUCH A VISCERAL AFFECT ON ME NOT EVEN IN THE ROOM NEVER SEEN THIS MANS FACE AND I KNOW HE HAS THE WORLDS SHITTIEST BEARD GET AWAY FROM ME

if i wanted to get into heaven and god said jurgein leitners waiting inside i would piss on gods feet for the sole purpose of getting sent back down

if i have to deal with jurgein leitner speaking one word in person on voice in podcast not only will i close the tab i will delete my bookmark out of spite and have to rewatch the entire series again for the experience of being able to skip all the times when he is mentioned or alive

i dont even know why i hate him so much. he collects books but i am just mad because i am angy

he better have some fucked up backstory to explain this if hes just some rich shithead whos a fan of creepypasta and wanted the irl version ill go ham

BETTER have had a book make him kill a man cuz if he didnt Im going to make him

paypal.com/IFuckingHateJurgeinLeitner

episodes not even about him. vaguely mentioned what is supposed to maybe be his library and I lost it

where the fuck is jurgein leitner if hes still alive im going to so deeply wish he wasnt

crusty old man

ill punch leitner and his sad frail old man twig bones will simply flake apart under my epic huge meat fist and he will disintegrate until all thats left is one final book he kept on him at all times simply titled Now You Fucked Up in ancient yiddish

im not breathing im hyperventilating at this point

i hope theres a date given for when jurgen died or will die so i can make it a reminder on my phone

everyday once a year i will see it and do anything but pay respects to the man who had so many fucked up if true books

[crazycookiemaniac]

Omg why are you losing so many followers youve been drawing gay shit for forever??? (Or maybe i as a gay was just interpreting it that way)

Because I literally spammed people every day for one week lmao. And also, a lot of people follow others for specific content. The moment I stop drawing that exact thing they followed me for, they unfollow me. There are also accounts that follow just to make you follow them & if you don’t, they unfollow you after a while. There’s people who followed me for haikyuu & weren’t interested in BC content, and there were people who followed me for BC content but got showered in gay art instead and that was not their cuppa tea. 

But mostly, i start appearing on people’s feed the more I post. So having me post incessantly for one week made me show up on feeds that I hadn’t shown up for  a good while, so there were probably people who forgot they had followed me in the first place & me posting was a reminder to unfollow.

Truthfully, follower counts are dumb. Yes, it is important for you to have a high follower count for you to get attention, but the amount of people actually following you if you don’t have a consistent art style & rarely ever post something with different vibes than your usual ones, is equal or less than 1% of your total amount of following.

My instagram tells me I have 43k. I do not have 43k people following me. I’ve had 43k that once saw my account & pressed the follow button, but their feeds are filled up with other people’s accs that interest them more than mine (as well as my own feed does not show all the content of the 200+ something people I follow, unless I scroll down till the depths of hell to find every single post on that day and then do so on the next day as well).

Essentially, 95% of your followers are there because of content. They want to see what entertains them. Most of them don’t care about the artist and don’t interact with them at all. Many of them are scared to, given the high follower count. Social media & big accounts make people forget that there are other, real, living & breathing people that are behind them all.

So, to many, I was just a random artist they found and “lol”ed at one of my comics & pressed follow without thinking about it. Most of them don’t go to my account and see all other art I’ve posted to see if they actually like what I do, or me as a person and as an artist at all.

People who don’t know this get really discouraged when they don’t earn a lot of followers, or when they lose a lot (like I did). And some people think you gotta have hundreds of thousands to be famous. I’ve seen accs going around that paid for ads, that had over 150k followers and less than 1k likes on their posts.

Truly famous, loved, growing and/or steady accounts have an amount of likes per post proportional to their follower count. For example, if someone has 150k followers, most of their posts will vary from 20k to 100k likes.

When I was growing my account because I hopped in the fandom bandwagon and stupid little me didn’t know that would only make me crash later, I had like 20~30k and some of my posts reached more than 20k likes (because people liked my stupid comics). Nowadays, I’m not part of the fandom that made me grow anymore. I’m part of a very underrated one (Black Clover), as well a I am drawing a very underrated ship (LuGna) that above all else is getting hated on. I have everything against me in this, so it’s no wonder I lost so many followers.

They didn’t wanna see gay art. They didn’t wanna see Black Clover. They didn’t even know what the fuck was going on. Not everyone paid attention or kept up with my warnings. Despite me explaining multiple times in multiple posts what the Thunder Flames project was about, a lot of people still didn’t know what I was doing that for.

The thing about being a big follower count is that, unless you’re actually loved for what you do (and to do that, once again, I need to emphasize that you need to keep a steady rhythm, a steady vibe, a steady you. Because people follow you for your first impression on them, and you gotta keep up to that first impression if you wanna keep your followers.

I’m unsteady. One look at my gallery and you’ll see how disorganized everything is. Oh, lookit, a 1 min speedpaint of a random drawing I did on an old piece of paper! And right on the left there’s a stupid random comic I did–on the right there’s this super detailed, shaded drawing I’ve done that actually looks terrible to me and I will 100% archive it later, and then there’s B&W mixed with gray shaded, flat colored and fully shaded characters of different fandoms + OCs from commissions and whatever else. 

The thing is, I made my follower count based on a fandom, and now that I’m not there most of that follower count does not have me on their feed. And most of them do not want me on their feed. Now, I’m trying to build a follower count for who I am as an artist, because the few people who have actually stayed and followed me throughout the years know how inconsistent I am in terms of art style, fandoms and everything else.

A solution to this would me either keep creating/posting the same thing all over again (just in different patterns), or creating original content (which I do plan on doing at some point). But for now? Since my follower count does absolutely not reflect on how many people actually like me and/or my art, I’m going to be as chaotic as fucking ever and do whatever the fuck I want.

So yes, I do find it comical that I lost 1k followers over this and am not fazed in the very least, especially because I literally foreshadowed losing 1k and hit the fucking jackpot.

The only reason I’m talking about this at all is because 1- it’s impossible not to notice my follower count decreasing, especially because every new 1k I thank people publicly through stories; 2- some people were actually worried I was upset over it and I have to 3- show that I am not, while simultaneously trying to show people that just because you’re losing followers doesn’t mean you have to stop doing what you want to create content to please people. It doesn’t mean you should be upset, and it doesn’t mean that what you’re doing is bad or wrong.

It means you’re fucking renewing your followers & you’ll now grow for what you’re trying to grow for, bitch. That’s what it’s all about.

Obviously, people do take a great risk doing this. I am taking a great risk doing this. I could’ve lost 5k, I could’ve lost 10k. But I only lost 1k! And that’s because I believe in the project I worked on; I knew there were people out there who enjoyed what I was doing and it’s on them that I was focused on. On the people who supported me AND my art, not just that one single funny comic post I did 3 years ago.

This answer is 100% a lot longer than what you could’ve possibly expected for and I am typing this while being awake for more than 24h so I’m sure that I’ve repeated myself a lot and that there are a lotta typos or w/e and I apologize for that!! But I’m too lazy to go back to read everything over & turn this into a neat post & I’m pretty sure I could answer your question in the first paragraph.

Oh and also. Yes. Yes I have been drawing gay shit ever since I’ve become an artist because I’m so fucking pissed at the lack of canon gay content in a way that it’s depicted as a normal fucking romantic couple instead of having eeeeeeeeveryone point their finger to the gay couple and scream “HEY THAT’S GAY!!! THIS CAN’T BE PART OF THIS VERY HETEROSEXUAL SHOW WHERE EVERYONE IS OBVIOUSLY HETEROSEXUAL EVEN THOUGH NONE OF THE CHARACTERS HAVE EVER SAID THAT EXPLICITLY BECAUSE WE KNOW THAT THE CREATORS ARE EITHER HETEROSEXUAL OR TOO AFRAID TO LOSE AUDIENCE IF THEY TREAT GAY PEOPLE AS NORMAL PEOPLE!??!! WHAT SORT OF ABSURD NONSENSE IS THAT??!! GAY PEOPLE AREN’T NORMAL!! THEY’RE GAY AND THEY SHOULD HAVE A GAY SHOW JUST FOR THEM IF THEY WANNA GET SCREENTIME” and yadda yadda yadda.

I’m tired of this bullshit. Ever since I was an artist I’ve been rooting for gay ships in shonen manga while knowing they would never happen just because they were gay, and now that we are in our Blessed-By-Satan, Pandemic-Chaotic, What-The-Fuck-Is-Going-On, We-Don’t-Know-If-We-Wanna-Go-Back-Or-To-The-Future-Or-Just-IDK-Fucking-Die year 2020, in which the LGBT community is thriving and being louder than ever to fight for our rights, Me, in my twenty four years of fucking age, having gone through several fucking disappointments ONLY regarding this matter, am sitting here on my ass, hopeful as all galactic, glittery shit that for some fucking reason, my new OTP formed by very underrated characters from this very underrated franchise in the southern and western communities, becomes canon because my stupid eyes can see chemistry between them even though those stupid haters’ can’t. But that’s because they’re stupid and homophobic, and they really should just shut the fuck up. I don’t wanna dream, I want to believe. Let a bitch pray in peace.

But even if I’m getting ready for disappointment, I’m gonna make this project happen and I’m gonna have a shit ton of artbooks from this Thunder Flames project inside my fucking garage if no one wants to buy them. But I am going to invest a shit ton of money in it and I am going to have these artbooks come to life. Because I am spiteful and petty and homophobes should shut the fuck up, and I wanna do what I wanna do bc as an independent artist, I’m building my future with my own two, very toned and buff by now from all the drawing I did, hands. 

God fucking damn it.

Jesus christ I’m just rambling at this point, I’m so sorry. If anyone ever reads this out of context people are going to be so confused.

But that’s fine. They won’t. You know why? Cuz I got almost 11k followers here on tumblr but less than 0.5% gives a shit that I’m here, so I’m safe.

Have a nice day, drink your water and fuck homophobes. Peace

[spn-ficfanatic]

F*ck Cancer- Ch 8: The End (Final)

SERIES MASTERLIST - CHAPTER ONE - CHAPTER TWO - CHAPTER THREE - CHAPTER FOUR - CHAPTER FIVE - CHAPTER SIX - CHAPTER SEVEN

A/N: This is it guys, the final chapter. No summary, the title speaks for itself. Let me know if you laughed, let me know if you cried, let me know if you decide to unfollow me after this cuz I’m scum (but please don’t?). Second A/N at the bottom.

Genre: Angst all the way

Characters: Sam x Reader, Dean x Platonic!Reader* *For the Dean ladies/lads: it may not be romantic between him and the reader, but it’s a very close brotherly/sisterly relationship and I still think y’all will really enjoy it :)

Words: 2412

———————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

You thought a lot about death. You wondered if it would hurt, or if you might just fall asleep... if you would even remember who you were when the time came. Would you go to heaven, or hell? If it was hell, would Crowley cut you some slack? If it was heaven, well… what even WAS heaven? Would your parents be there? Would you have an imaginary Sam to keep you company, until the real one could join you?

Sam thought a lot about what came after death. Not being able to wake up every morning and spoon you until you opened your eyes and kissed his neck. Not sitting with you in the garden anymore, watching the family of foxes behind your house as they grew up and had cubs. Not being able to follow the foxes and have babies of your own. Moreso, he couldn’t even begin to imagine what he would do next. You wanted him to sell the house and go back to hunting, but he couldn’t see a life after you.

Dean mostly thought about ways to save you. Sure, you’d had this conversation with them before and they’d promised not to look. But he did anyway, while you slept he hid away in his room and scoured as many books and websites as he could. Columns of printed paper highlighted in various colours filled his wardrobe to the brim, hidden from view. Suddenly the man who loathed research found himself living and breathing the pages of any ancient book he could get his hands on. Bobby had brought some with him when he came for the wedding, and continued to look on his own back at his house. But time was drawing nearer, the inevitable just around the corner, and hope was running out.

The day you heard loud crashes coming from Dean’s room was the day you knew... If there ever WAS hope, it was now gone. Of course you knew he was still looking for ways to save you, you weren’t stupid. And you’d be lying if you said you weren’t slightly optimistic that he might come through with some miracle, despite what you told them. Sam looked at you with concern and you gave him a small sad smile.

“He’s been trying to find ways to save me,” you whispered to him, too tired to speak at a regular volume anymore. You saw a flash of anger cross his eyes, and brushed your palm over his cheek affectionately. “Don’t be angry with him, he needed a distraction from watching me die. You need to help him now though, because I think his world just crumbled.”

You smiled sadly, and leaned over to kiss him lightly on the lips. He nodded, and sniffled as he stood up and tread carefully to his older brother’s room while the noise continued. You listened to the exchange from the lounge room, unable to do anything but sit helplessly.

Sam opened the door and his eyes widened to find hundred of pages floating through the air. Feathers too, and he spotted a torn pillow on the floor. Books and papers were littered across the carpet, and Dean’s laptop lay on top with a broken screen. The older brother hadn’t even noticed Sam had walked in, he was too busy swearing and shredding the hundreds of papers he’d collected over the last few months.

“Dean!” Sam shouted, stepping forward and grabbing his arm. Dean thrust his arm away and didn’t respond, continuing to destroy whatever he could lay his hands on. When he reached for one of Bobby’s ancient books Sam yelled with alarm and grabbed him harder, pushing him onto the bed. “Snap out of it man, Bobby will kill you if you wreck tha-”

“Shut it Sam, get out of here,” Dean responded, moving to stand on his feet again before Sam pushed him back down. Dean glared at him, seeing red. In one fell swoop he leapt up and pushed him back, sending him into the desk.

“I’m not leaving Dean,” he growled, standing tall in front of his big brother.

“Fine, then I will,” he replied, making for the door. Sam rushed to block his way, and Dean shook his head with a humourless laugh before punching him in the jaw. Sam staggered back slightly, but quickly recovered before pushing Dean back into the room. He hit the wall and fell to the floor.

“You’re not going anywhere,” he told him angrily, “not like this. You’re not gonna go out and get blind stinking drunk and pick a fight with a guy who probably doesn’t deserve it. You wanna punch someone? Punch me. I’m the one who brought us here. I’m the one who fell in love with a dying woman. I’m the one who’s forced you to watch Y/N die.”

Tears were filling his eyes at this point, but Dean didn’t notice through his own. He stood up, using the now broken and unstable desk for support. It creaked under his weight, its legs cracking.

“Fuck off Sam, this isn’t on you OK? This is all on me. I’m supposed to be the big brother, I’m supposed to get you guys out of trouble, that’s my damn job. Always has been, always will be,” he growled, kicking a nearby wastebasket in frustration. He paused, bringing his hands up and rubbing his face, resting them behind his head as he looked away with tears in his eyes.

“That’s not on you Dean,” Sam told him, calmer now as he watched his brother’s wall collapse. He slowly approached him, careful not to step on anything in the process. “You’re not here because you’re just some guy we’d hired to save her life, you’re here because we’re a family. And sometimes part of that is accepting that family doesn’t end with death.”

Sam voice shuddered as he spoke that word. He generally tried to avoid it when it came to speaking about you but lately had been trying to be more open to the idea, which meant not shying away from it. He cleared his throat before continuing.

“Y/N doesn’t blame you for not finding a cure. I don’t blame you. I’m a little pissed that you kept it from me truth be known, but that’s a whole other thing.”

The corner of Dean’s mouth raised slightly in a half-hearted smirk, and he nodded slightly. He sniffed, and brought his hands down and rested them on his hips.

“How’s she doing?” he asked quietly. “Really?”

Sam sighed and ran his hand through his hair, sitting down on Dean’s bed.

“She’s sleeping a lot, not eating much. Her memory is just getting worse, along with the headaches and the nosebleeds. So, everything you’d expect I guess.”

Dean frowned and leaned back against the wall he stood in front of. As he opened his mouth to respond he heard a crash coming from the lounge-room, and as he and Sam shared an alarmed glance they both bolted from the room shouting your name.

They found you on the ground where Sam had left you in your wheelchair, shaking as a seizure wracked your body. Sam fell to the floor next to you and rolled you to your side.

“Dean!” he cried in a panic. “Wha-what do I do?”

“You’re doing it man, just sit with her,” he responded, trying to stay calm for his little brother as he pulled his mobile out and called for an ambulance. He patted him on the shoulder in reassurance, “just hang on Sammy, I’m getting help.”

--------------------

As Dr Wheeler approached them, they could see on her face that the news wasn’t good. They didn’t wait for her to reach them, standing from their chairs and meeting her halfway instead.

“How is she?” Sam asked desperately. They’d been waiting anxiously for 3 hours while they examined you and called in your doctor for a second opinion. Dr Wheeler sighed, and gestured for them to take a seat with her.

“No, please Doc, we’ve been sitting for hours,” Dean told her firmly. “Just tell us.”

Sally nodded in understanding, and cleared her throat. “Y/N is comfortable for now, but the tumour has increased in size significantly since I last saw her. If nothing else, it’s confirmation that any further treatment would have merely caused her unnecessary suffering,” she explained, trying to soften the blow. “I’m afraid other than making her comfortable, we can’t do anything more for her.”

Dean nodded, looking at the ground. “How long?”

Sally looked at the two men sadly. The older brother couldn’t bear to look her in the eyes, and the younger stood staring into space, hearing but not seeing. She’d seen it hundreds of times before and it never got any easier, but something about these men made it harder than most.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t expect she’ll make it through the night.”

Sam lifted his eyes to hers, tears pooling but not falling. Behind her he could see the sun rising through the window, turning a beautiful shade of purple that he knew you would have loved. The idea that you might not see it set nearly broke him, but some inner strength he didn’t know he had kept him standing.

“Can we take her home please?” he asked, his voice cracking.

“Of course,” she told him with a sad smile. “I can arrange for a nurse to join you and administer pain relief, and an ambulance to take her home and connect her to a drip. It should be enough to get her through relatively pain-free and, hopefully, conscious enough to allow you to say goodbye.”

Against his better judgement a small sob escaped Dean’s throat, but he quickly cleared it and avoided his brothers gaze.

“Sam, why don’t you go sit with Y/N? I can do the paperwork,” he offered, looking at Sally for the first time. She nodded with a small smile, indicating this would be fine, and led the boys to your room.

--------------------

You were asleep for most of the day but this wasn’t unusual for you anymore. You woke up for an hour around lunchtime, sitting on Sam’s lap while he and Dean shared a beer on your porch. You were wrapped snugly in your quilt, and coupled with Sam’s body warmth you were very toasty. You were grateful when they didn’t make a fuss when you opened your eyes; Dean offered you a beer and you enjoyed a small sip as they continued talking about whatever topic they could think of to fill the silence. Dean told you Bobby was on his way and you gave a small nod, resting your head against your husband’s chest and looking out over your garden.

“Will you guys be ok?” you asked quietly, and silence fell.

Sam’s grip on you tightened as you heard Dean’s footsteps approach you. As he knelt down to face you, you noted sadly that his eyes were red and puffy.

“Not really,” he told you honestly, brushing a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “But we know that you’ll be safe wherever you are.”

“Do hunters, do hunters go to heaven? Do you think?” you asked, already running out of breath.

“Yes,” Sam answered, not missing a beat. “And even if they don’t, Crowley is going to make sure you do.”

You wrinkled your brow in confusion. “You didn’t-”

“Make a deal?” Dean finished for you with a reassuring smile. “No, no deal. Just a favour, he owed me one.”

Dean didn’t miss the sparkle in your eyes at that news. “So my mom…”

“You’ll see her again,” Dean promised solemnly. “She’ll look after you.”

A tear slid down your cheek and you nodded slightly. Sam leaned over and planted a kiss on your cheek, and you turned your head slowly to look at him.

“Until we’re together again,” you told him simply. He had held it together before this, but couldn’t stop the dam from breaking at that moment. Unable to answer he simply nodded, and kissed you on the lips. You let your head fall to his chest again to look at Dean, who was unable to stop his own tears, and gave him a small smile.

“I know,” you whispered, before letting your eyes close for what would be the last time.

-------------------------------

EPILOGUE

As Dean pulled Baby up to the sand he cut the engine. They had been driving for 2 days waiting for something, anything, to speak to them. To say they were looking for a sign was corny; perhaps it was more guidance that they sought. Neither had spoken much since your death. They wordlessly picked out an urn to collect as many of your ashes as they could and, with Bobby in tow, drove you to a remote location in the woods to give you the hunter’s funeral you deserved.

And now here they were, thousands of miles away from Austin and standing on a beach a few hours out of Seattle, the first they’d come across since heading west. They took off their shoes as they looked over the horizon, the sun setting, and as Dean headed towards the water Sam followed behind carrying your urn.

The water felt warmer than it should have been, inviting almost, and they walked in until the water lapped at their knees.

“She’ll like it here,” Sam commented, watching the children play further down the beach and a family of ducks floating nearby. Dean nodded in silent agreement as Sam removed the lid with a trembling hand. He waited until the breeze came, and gently tipped your ashes out of the urn. The breeze took you easily, and you danced in the air gracefully before landing on the water. A small wave enveloped you, and soon you were scattered amongst the fish and coral underneath the surface.

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

A/N 2: OK, so, in my defense nearly every fic I write the Reader makes some miraculous recovery. I felt it was time to branch out from this. I hope I did it justice, and I hope everyone still liked the ending even though I saw many of you hoping she’d make it.

If you like my stuff please be sure to ask to be on one of my taglists! I’ve been thinking for a while that I’d like to do another Buffy episode rewrite... if anyone has a request for an episode send me an ask!

Thanks for joining me on this journey... love y’all!

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

SERIES MASTERLIST - CHAPTER ONE - CHAPTER TWO - CHAPTER THREE - CHAPTER FOUR - CHAPTER FIVE - CHAPTER SIX - CHAPTER SEVEN

MY MASTERLIST

Tag Lists (Open)

Series Taglist: @deghostyboi , @dreaminemz , @spence-rreid, @almostelegantfire , @ericaprice2008 @mirandaaustin93, @sandlee44

“Dean/Jensen” taglist:  @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk, @perpetualabsurdity, @mlovesstories

“Everything” taglist: @angelsandwinchesters, @grace-for-sale, @growningupgeek, @iamnotsaneatall, @nanie5, @waywardasfudge, @im-dead-inside05, @julzdec, @adoptdontshoppets, @meghanbeinghappy, @sleepylunarwolf , @sammysgirl1997, @imaginationisgrowth, @screechingartisancashbailiff , @flamencodiva

People who requested tags, that I cannot tag (but will still mention because I feel bad :( ): @ronja-uebrick, @lilydarcy, @cabbagewithissues

[rivetgoth]

Please be very cautious about upping your dosage! If you up it too soon and too much it will actually have less effect on your body because it can get converted back.

Anon I’m sure you mean well but this hasn’t been the best day with this sort of thing and I just would like to very very very heavily emphasize to not just you but anyone who does this sort of thing to maybe stop trying to be helpful to trans people in the process of transitioning by giving relatively useless information that boils down to very little except fearmongering hidden behind good intentions. Even if you mean well I really encourage you and anyone who does this sort of thing to think very conciously about how they think this is going to help a dysphoric trans person. (Also, as a side note since I know I’m gonna talk about dysphoria a lot here, idc how people without dysphoria identify I think as long as you aren’t hurting people then idc you know yourself best and all and I know gender is complex. Anyway.)

Things to have kept in mind before you sent this would have been:

1. You don’t know what dosage I’m on now, what dosage I’m moving up to, or anything about what I’m actually doing. From the beginning the doctor and I agreed on starting at the lowest possible dosage for personal reasons and to move up after a short period of time. Everyone transitions differently and this was laid out with a doctor since day 1.

2. I very clearly said in that post that I spoke to my doctor about this, who’s a specialist who’s been doing this for years. I contacted her and very clearly laid out how much I want to move up and when and told her I won’t until I’ve heard back with her explicit consent that it would be safe. Why in the world would you read that I talked to my doctor about this and still presume I needed a warning that this may somehow go badly.

3. You’re on anon, I don’t know ANYTHING about you. I certainly have no reason to believe you know more than my doctor. I don’t know if you’re speaking from personal experience, from something you read online (and if it was from online I don’t know where you got that information because transphobia is absolutely bursting from the seams on the internet), if you’re actually some weird transphobe who thinks I just shouldn’t transition at all, etc. Not that what you said is untrue, but what the intent of it being said was... You know nothing about me and I know nothing about you or your intention or your experience here. But I do know my doctor has been working with trans patients for years and has prescribed HRT to countless trans people and we’ve talked about this since day 1 and after a conversation with her she gave me explicit permission to move up to a higher dosage. I shouldn’t have to transcribe my exact conversation with my doctor in order to be not threatened with “the risks” by anonymous strangers on the internet. (This actually speaks to a larger issue I have with people anonymously arm chair diagnosing and speaking with authority on medical things and acting as medical professionals on anon to people they don’t even know and how dangerous that can be, but that’s another topic for another day)

I’m sorry to be a dick about this and I don’t mean to attack you. I don’t wanna sound aggressive and I really don’t want you to feel bad if you had good intentions cuz I truly don’t think this reflects badly of you as a person, if you had good intentions I appreciate your concern and I don’t want you to feel bad, I really just want to highlight an issue I have with something that’s much more prevalent than just this ask. This was actually an EXACT topic I was literally just talking to another trans friend TODAY about, and this is kind of the perfect example for me to voice the complaint. There’s a very very subtle form of very dangerous transphobic rhetoric present in “woke” spaces online that frankly encourages people to talk down to dysphoric trans folk, especially those transitioning. I unfollow people who post things about how dangerous and unsafe binding is at this point because I absolutely never see posts about that - unless it’s made by other dysphoric trans people - that don’t horrifically talk down to trans folk, speak to them like they’re stupid freaks or children that are going to horrifically damage their body forever, with no consideration that if someone needs to bind it’s due likely to a severe mental disorder that can and often does lead to suicide. It’s fearmongering without thought of alternatives, of safe suggestions, of any fucking compassion for those suffering with dysphoria so severe that they quite literally need to get countless surgeries and take medicine for the rest of their lives to even begin to feel comfortable in their own skin. People really get off thinking the most woke thing in the world is constantly reminding people who are suffering that “there are risks!!!!!” and it really starts to sound like conservatives who tell trans people that hormones will ruin their bodies and pull up biased “studies” trying to prove that transitioning is actually just going to cause “more harm than good,” which is a mindset that leads directly to suicide. I don’t know if people truly grasp the severity of dysphoria. It’s not a little discomfort, or not feeling very good or being kind of depressed, it’s life threatening in its intensity and there is something very disturbing to me about the amount of posts that exist purely meant to “warn” dysphoric trans people of how severe the potential side effects of transitioning is. I’ve even seen this escalated to the point that for awhile a straight up conservative anti-trans propaganda piece was spread around with straight up UNTRUE information about HRT causing higher death rates as a “omg signal boost for my trans followers uwuwuwu” thing.

If you see a trans person who says “I talked to my doctor and I’m upping my T dosage!” and your first thought is to immediately send a warning of the dangers, of the risk of things getting worse or not working, I really really really suggest you introspect on why that had to be your immediate response. I believe that you had wholly good intentions but I really think it speaks to a larger problem in how dysphoric trans people are talked down to by even strangers/anons even in “safe spaces” online. The way they’re talked down to, the way the very first thing to come out of peoples’ mouths has to be warnings, threats, and risks. I know there are genuine health risks associated with these things. Binding is always gonna be a little risky and providing helpful information and resources on how to do that as safely as possible is good! Making posts about things to keep in mind with HRT, with surgery recovery, all of that, those aren’t bad. But how would you guys feel if, say, you had to see a post every other day about HOW DANGEROUS your life saving medications were? What if once a week you saw a post that just laid out the most basic “side effects may include” info on the side of the bottle for your painkillers that help you live a normal life? What if you made a post saying you were prescribed medicine to help with a disorder that had impacted you your entire life and the first thing you were told was a warning about how it might actually go wrong and not actually help?? Dysphoria and transitioning aren’t different, but there’s this extremely prevalent mindset still that the best thing you can possibly do to help a dysphoric trans person in the process of transitioning is... tell them about how risky it is. I really really beg everyone to introspect a bit on this.

[crazyblogging]

legit unfollowed vampire bog lesbian for being an anti because like... her whole blog is so - insidiously political...... for this politic of a kind of aggressively retconned naturalism that i actually cannot stand. and it just kinda made it too obvious to be able to keep following the bog jokes. plus i don’t really like blogs that are about creating a cult of personality around the blogger even if they’re entirely harmless

ofc that’s one explanation but the other explanation is that i’m kinda ready to die on the hill that there’s nothing the fuck wrong with wanting the wrong fictional characters to fuck. like obviously i do in fact draw conclusions abt people based on their writing even if it’s just for fun fic and not all of these conclusions are morally neutral

but i just... i have been in so many healthy relationships with adults as a teenager.... i don’t think it’s like a good idea for everyone or whatever but it’s so important that precocious teens not be left out to dry w/ only the grownups who are generally willing to violate their society’s sexual ethics yk. the bizarre puritan thing where a relationship can pass from evil to ok in the space of a week cuz someone had a birthday really screws us all, lying about which things are pedophilia screws us all, aggressively separating teenagers and 18+yos (until they make it 21+yos) screws us all but particularly people who are supposed to just completely change their entire social positioning the day they turn 18??

i’m. so fucking mad about this actually. bc people who think it’s evil for adults and teens to date have only ever hurt me and my friends as actual teenagers dating adults and usually having a good time but sometimes getting hurt. like is it questionable? sure. am i gonna expect ppl to do their due diligence? yea. but like when i was 14 i had a casual boyfriend who was 26 (although boyfriend is a bit of a stretch, we’d go on dates but the dates would be like we’d kiss one time and then talk philosophy for a few hours) and this was just a 99% positive enriching experience that i don’t regret (knocking a percentage point off because negotiating the part where we wanted to technically be dating but didn’t really wanna like kiss much was a bit awkward). like if i went back through my life i’d make some different choices but i’d absolutely date that guy then! it was good! and in fact he did not make a mistake there

sometimes people who are 14 are meaningfully adults who know what they’re fucking doing and i wish people would stop invalidating my experience of life + had i not had my much older people i was dating i would have been much worse off in my early teens, having mutually respectful relationships with established grownups with jobs who could take me in in a pinch if i decided to run away was a thing that kept me sane during shit with my parents and had everyone been like ‘no we can’t date even though we both wanna and nothing would go wrong because it’s Not Allowed’ would have made me a lot less comfortable

this is not everyone’s life but this is my life and it’s fine to make tradeoffs that screw me for the greater good but look me in the fucking eye while you do it

[destinyc1020]

i’m with you on your opinion of kaia and austin. to each there own and my opinion truly does not do a single thing but i’ve always kept a hope that him and vanessa would get back together. it’s not like they were a fling.. they were together almost a decade! they must of had something good going for themselves and cliqued with each other to be together that long. obviously things change and they’ve both changed and are doing different things, but you never know!

on the other hand, you have people like my mom saying “i hope zac and vanessa get back together” 🤣 THAT was a while ago

Awww......Aunessa lol 😭

Yea, when I look back at all of the old pictures of Austin and Vanessa together through the years, they just looked SO in love, and almost like soul mates. 😔 You could really tell the love btwn those two, and they just seemed so comfortable with each other. I guess after 9 years together you would! 😂

Anytime ppl would bring up Austin's name in interviews, Vanessa would just gush all over him... even in year 8 of being together lol 😂 So obviously he was making her happy if she only had nothing but great things to say about him, and vice versa.

It's almost hard to imagine that two people who seemed to love each other THAT much could break up and now be with other ppl.

But oh well! C'est la vie I guess? 🤷🏾‍♀️

You know, I too was wondering if they would ever get back together at some point (I wouldn't be surprised tbh), but after he recently unfollowed her on IG, I've quit with that type of wishful thinking lol 😆

I think that was the final nail in the coffin tbh. While it's still kinda weird how Vanessa is somehow linked to most of the other women Austin has dated after her (ie. Olivia, Kaia, etc), I really do think they have gone their separate ways and have officially moved on long time ago. Vanessa seems blissfully happy with Cole, and Austin seems genuinely happy with Kaia. 😊

In fact, now that I look at it, A & V do seem to be very different and in different places in life right now. So maybe the split was for the best? 🤷🏾‍♀️

Re: Zanessa

Omg your poor mom lol 😆 What decade are we in again lol? I honestly don't see Zac and Vanessa ever getting back together again lol, but hey.... who saw JLo and Ben Affleck getting back together married to each other after 17 years, multiple marriages, multiple divorces and several kids? 🤣

So never say never I guess lol. 🤭

Omg I just remember how Austin got such an insane amount of hate from Zanessa shippers cuz HSM sweethearts Zac and Vanessa had broken up and she was now dating Austin lol 😆

After 8 or 9 years of her dating him though, shipper fans gotta just accept that their ship has long-since died and their fave has moved on to someone else! 😄

Don't be rude!

If TZ ever broke up again and seriously dated other respectable ppl, I sure hope the fandom wouldn't jump on their new SO's necks just cuz the new person isn't "Tom" or "Zendaya", coz that wouldn't be cool either. 👀😔

[sweetjunmyeon]

TORI'S 600 FOLLOWERS GIFT!!!

I reached 600 followers recently and since i forgot to do anything for 500, I’m bringing you this gift! I’m giving you all fic recs!!! I read a lot when I had time, and I think this might be a nice gift for me to give you all!! That being said, i havent read some of these in a while, so they might not be as good as when i settled 3 years ago.

If you have recs for ME tho, send them bc I’m desperate rn akljfhkjfah (especially minseok)

I took half of these off my rec list from my writing blog, and some of the themes and pairing in others are…a bit…ya know (read the triggers on the actual story fr if you have problems with some of the themes). So like judge away I guess; I kept the like…really bad stuff off cuz i don’t need yall unfollowing me for some of the shit i read when i was young and naive.

💎=Tumblr

💣=AFF

—-

🔞 =18+

🌟= ID SELL MY SOUL FOR THIS STORY

M i n s e o k / X i u m i n

💎 🔞🌟 2am 

💎 🔞 Ready or Not

💎These Days 

💎Comeback ​

💎A Good Catch

💣🌟The Blood Brother Code

J u n m y e o n / S u h o

💎 🔞 The Whale Song ​

💎 🔞 Just Regular Stuff 

💎 🔞 Friends

💎 🔞 Dizzy​

💎 🔞🌟 Your Star Wars Shirt

💎 🔞 The Crisis by

💎 🔞 Walk-Ins Welcome

💎 🔞 Don’t Lie to Me

💎 🔞 Stress Reliever

💎 🔞🌟 Higher

💣T is for Tattle

Y i x i n g /  L a y

💎 🔞 Shutter

💎 🔞🌟 Before You Leave

💣 🔞 Confess

B a e k h y u n

💎 🔞 Sticky

💎 🔞 The Different Ways to Take Down a Bear 

💎 🔞🌟 I Give Up

💎 🔞 The Ugly Friend

💎 🔞 Last Time 

💎Psych

💎Dyeing To Meet You

💎 🔞🌟 Guardian

💎 🔞 Someone That I [Wanna] Know

💎 🔞🌟 Nothing More

💣 🔞 Teach Me Sex

💣 🔞🌟 The Marriage Life of Mr. Byun

💣Florescence of Love

💣 🔞 Rules & Regulations

💣A Dead Man’s Diary

💣Half A Page

💣Attayear

J o n g d a e / C h e n

💎 🔞 Desperate

💎 🔞 Weak

💎 🔞 I Hate You

💎 🔞 Behind His Back

💎It Was Then

💎The Big Slip Up

💎 🔞🌟 Guardian

💎 🔞🌟 Caffeine

💎 🔞 How Bad Could He Be

💣Symptoms

💣87 Steps to Kim Jongdae

C h a n y e o l

💎 🔞 Killer

💎 🔞 Make Me Feel It

💎 🔞 Off Air

💎Spoil 

💎They Don’t Know About Us

💎Catch A Fly 

💎Nobody Else

💎 🔞🌟 Bruise

K y u n g s o o / D . O

💎 🔞 Borrowed T-Shirt

💎 🔞 Daisy

💎 🔞🌟 All His

💎 🔞🌟 The Price of Privilege

💎 🔞 Mistakes

💎Denouement

💎 🔞 Consider Me Yours by

💎 🔞 If to Please

💎 🔞 Audiophile

💣🌟Guts

💣Sacrifice

💣No Free Wifi For You

J o n g i n /  K a i

💎 🔞 Hips

💎 🔞 I Promise I Will Behave

💎 🔞 Egotistical

💎 🔞 A Tap on Your Window

💎Break the Distance

💎Don’t Run Off

💎 🔞 If to Please

💎Because of the Chicken?

💣 🔞🌟 Running With Wolves

S e h u n

💎 🔞 And There She Is

💎 🔞 Tension

💎Everything Has Changed

💎 🔞 Without A Word

💎 🔞 If to Please

💣🌟27 Days

Former Members and Others:

💎 🔞 Lucky Charm (Luhan)

💎 🔞 What a Beautiful View (Taemin)

🔞 Almost Like Breathing (SuhoxJongin)

💣🌟Two Moons (????)

💣 Delta (Harem)

💣Red Skys and Royal Cards (Harem)

💣The Other Girl (Luhan)

💣 🔞🌟 Down Dog is Hell (LuhanxMinseok)

💣 🔞 Just Different (BaekxChen)

💣 🔞 Heart Vacancy (SuhoxJongin)

💣 🔞 A Man Who Can Do Both (SehunxMinseok)

💣 🔞 Scent (JonginxKsoo)

💣 🔞🌟 The Faults in Byun Baekhyun (PcyxBaek)

💣Day and Night (BaekxSehun)

[junkobears]

3, 7, 8 and 19!

Knew I could count on ya, anon. Going under a Read more due to length and V3 spoilers.

3. Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?

Yes, many many times. Anyone who posts too much content about characters I hate is automatically unfollowed for one. Blogs that hate on all my favourite characters and hugely misinterpret them get instantly unfollowed. Posting meta analysis that I heavily disagree with also gets a blog unfollowed. I would give examples but then it’d be so obvious which popular DR blogs I’m referring too… Generally I just don’t follow people who have drastically different fandom opinions from me anymore. I’m that one snobby fan all alone on my unpopular opinion island, I’ll admit that much haha.

7. Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?

In DR + fandom? I used to like Naegi a lot when DR1 was the only game in the series. And then more installments came out and kept hyping him up as Hope Jesus that everything and everyone revolves around despite him barely changing or doing shit. And I also really can’t stand bland self-insert nice guy VA protagonists who both canon and fandom over-praise anymore. It’s so goddamn tiresome.

Also (shockingly I know) I used to like Saihara a lot pre-V3. Liked his design and thought he had potential to be a subversion of Kirigiri’s character. Then the game came out and You-Know-What happened. Now I hate him more than I hate Komaeda, which is genuinely impressive in some ways. 

8. Have you received anon hate? What about?

Nope! But this is most likely because I just don’t ever post original content on here or on AO3, haha. If I actually posted my opinions and fics I’d most likely get some hate. If I had to guess what for: Despair Sisters content + I hate literally all the stuff the fandom loves. The usual.

19. What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

The sheer amount of vitriol I see for DR1 from a surprising amount of ‘fans’ in this fandom. I genuinely don’t comprehend this. It’s cool if you prefer the sequels to the first game cuz yeah, it does have weaker gameplay and some people will just prefer characters/plots from the other games… but the number of people I see who talk about how much they HATED DR1 and how they don’t give a shit about any of the characters and how the gameplay was awkward, the mysteries were terrible and they thought the plot was stupid… but then talk about how much they loved DR2/V3 it’s kinda just like… why the fuck did you even bother with the rest of the series if you hated the first game so much? At least respect the game that provides the base for the rest of this series, for fuck’s sake.

Also I really can’t stand how dude-focused this fandom is, but that’s just every fandom ever, really. I do hate how the series is pandering to this demographic in every way possible lately though. V3 was so goddamn awful for this. Yes it’s just a coincidence all the fandom fave pretty boys were the focus of every major plot point 🙄 And all the girls either died in the first half of the game and/or only existed to be love interests. Yumeno and Shirogane did jack shit in the latter half of the game, as much as I like them. It’s just fucking disappointing compared to DR1 and DRAE. Especially after being promised Akamatsu. I really cannot express how bitter I  am about this.