#i keep saying i’ll figure it out but i had this exact conversation with a friend almost a year ago

[ectoplasmer]

squinting really hard at that egogender label again

[kaiijo]

WORK WIFE — KUROO TETSUROU

pairing: kuroo tetsurou x fem! reader content: fluff, timeskip! kuroo (he’s so sexy)

you’re not really sure when kuroo started calling you his ‘work wife,’ but you honestly wouldn’t have it any other way. like many of your colleagues, you’ve been taken in by his teasing smile and charm and the way he brings you your coffee and bagel in the morning, just the way you like it. “good morning, wifey,” he says as he hands you your breakfast with a flourish. “vanilla latte with oat milk and an extra shot of espresso and a toasted everything bagel with cream cheese.” 

you smile and thank him, sliding the bagel out from the waxy paper bag. you glance back inside and sheepishly open your mouth but kuroo beats you to the punch. “and, of course, your stirrer.” he sticks his hand in the pocket of his slate gray slacks and produces a wooden stirrer. 

you chuckle, “you keep those in your pants just for me?”

“a gentleman always is prepared for a lady!”

“‘gentleman,’” you snort. 

kuroo presses a hand over his heart. “i am a gentleman through and through!”

“uh-huh, keep telling yourself that.” you take a sip of your drink. “but thanks again for breakfast.”

he pats your head and sings out, “anything for my favorite work wife!”

“i better be your only one!” he laughs loudly at your reply, the sound bouncing off the walls as he heads down the hall to his office. 

when lunchtime rolls around, kuroo, as usual, appears in your doorway with his lunch in hand. he never has the same thing, you’ve come to learn; today’s meal is grilled fish over rice, and kuroo asks, “up for a lunch date?”

you try to fight the warmth rising to your cheeks, still not used to his wording despite the many times he’s asked the exact same thing. you shake your head and sigh, “unfortunately, i’m behind on inputting the quarter two estimations so i think i’ll be working through lunchtime.”

kuroo still walks into your office and comes around to look at your computer screen. “have you been doing these all by hand?”

“yeah?”

“here, there’s an easier way to generate these estimates.” with a few clicks and keystrokes, you watch as numbers and figures fill the spreadsheet cells before your very eyes. you slump back in your chair, relieved. you glance up at kuroo. he’s so close that you can very clearly smell the way his cologne mingles with his minty toothpaste. your breath hitches as he stares down at you with pride. “you’re a lifesaver.”

“had to save my lunch time with my work wife.”

you stifle a yawn as you save your last pitch for the budget board and power off your computer. you looked out the window, the sun beginning to set on the horizon. you roll your chair away and stretch your hold body out, humming in relief as someone knocks on your door. it’s not hard to guess who it is. “come in.”

“hey,” kuroo pokes his head inside, blazer folded across his arm and his lanyard in hand. “ready to go?”

“yep, let me just get my stuff.” you gather your things and sling your bag over your shoulder, locking up your office and following kuroo out. you walk side-by-side in comfortable, tired silence until you get out of the building. “how was the merch presentation?”

“oh, it went really well,” he says. “thanks for letting me co-opt your time for rehearsal.”

“you know i always have time for you.”

kuroo gives you a smile that’s almost way too soft and sweet for you to handle, and you quickly avert your eyes to the street in front of you as you two come to the metro stop. he asks about how your younger brother is settling into college and you inquire about his grandparents, and it’s an endless stream of conversation as you two board the metro together. 

“oh,” kuroo says suddenly, voice shifting to a quieter tone. “i’ve been meaning to ask, do you want to—?”

you desperately want to hear the end of his question but you’re coming up to your stop and you have to hurry home to walk your dog. “sorry! text me the question?”

he shakes his head. “i’ll tell you later. see you tomorrow, wifey.”

you wave to him over the shoulder as the doors close behind you, and you’re left with a warm feeling in your chest and burning curiosity about what he’ll ask you. 

it’s the next day when your boss calls you into her office, asking you to let the newest employee to the sports promotion division shadow you for a little while until he gets the hang of what you guys do. his name’s nakamura eijun and he seems nice enough so you agree.

nakamura’s in your office as you go over how the jva’s filing and record-keeping online works when kuroo comes in with your daily breakfast. you sit up straighter, ready for him to finish whatever question he was about to ask. 

he stops short when he sees nakamura and asks, “new guy?” nakamura nods and introduces himself, to which kuroo responds with an enthusiastic “i’m kuroo tetsurou. welcome to the team!” and without your usual banter, kuroo drops off your bagel and coffee and leaves without another word. 

he peeks into your office again at lunch and you’re about to wave him inside, but he shakes his head and says, “i’ll come back later!”

he doesn’t. you don’t see kuroo for the rest of the day, which makes your heart sink. it’s the first time in months that he hasn’t followed the unconscious routine the two of your started. you try to look at the silver-lining. kuroo (and thinking about kuroo) is your main distraction of the day, so maybe it was a good thing he didn’t show up so you couldn’t make a fool of yourself. 

what unnerves you, though, is that the following days are much the same. kuroo silently brings you your breakfast and peeks in every now and then, smile never quite meeting his eyes as he sees you eating with nakamura in your office. the days stretch to weeks and you realize two things: one — that kuroo’s avoiding you, and two — nakamura’s a lot less capable than you thought he would be, given that he’s still shadowing you after about two and a half weeks. 

thankfully, you get a little reprieve when nakamura informs you that he’s out sick for the day. you perk up when kuroo comes in with your breakfast and give him your chirpiest “good morning.”

he leans up against your doorframe, glancing around. “your new work husband’s not here today?”

“what are you talking about?”

he says, “your new work husband. he have some emergency or something?”

you frown at his tone. “sorry, let me be more specific. who are you talking about?”

“nakamura,” he responds. finally, he crosses the threshold and hands you your bagel and coffee, the stirrer already inside the bagel bag. he plops down heavily in his chair, arms folded across his chest. 

“you know you’re my one and only,” you say, offering a smile. when he doesn’t reply, your smile fades and you ask, “why do you think he’s my new work husband?”

“he’s been telling everyone that you two spend so much time together that he might as well be.”

you can’t help but roll your eyes and you reach across the desk, tapping your hand on the surface to get kuroo’s attention. he finally meets your gaze and you say, “we’ve been spending a lot of time together because sakura asked me to let him shadow and he’s—” you lower your voice to a conspiratorial whisper, prompting kuroo to lean in closer, “—not very smart.”

“really?” 

you watch as the tension kuroo held in his shoulders disappeared and something like relief washed across his features. you can’t help but laugh a little, “really. is that what got you so grumpy these past few days?”

“hey!” he protests, “i wasn’t grumpy. pouty, maybe, but definitely never grumpy.”

“sure, sure.” you pause and then ask, “why were you so bothered by nakamura saying he’s like my work husband?”

kuroo’s face flushes and with an uncharacteristic shyness, he says, “because, y’know, that’s— that’s our thing. and i’m not too keen on letting someone steal my wife away.”

“good to know you’re a protective husband.”

he chuckles and says, “well, gotta get back to the trenches. those advertisement pitches aren’t going to pitch themselves.”

“don’t i know it.”

as he goes to leave, he hesitates in the doorway. then, he turns back to you and asks, “would you like to have dinner with me tonight? if you’re not doing anything, of course.”

your eyebrows raise but you can’t help the bright smile from breaking across your face. “yeah, that sounds great.”

a year and a half later.

nakamura and you are sitting in the conference room, brainstorming ways to help boost the sendai frogs’s popularity. nakamura taps his pen against his chin and suggests, “maybe we should tell koganegawa to stop yelling so much?”

“no, their fans like his enthusiasm,” you say. 

“well, tsukishima’s their most popular player… maybe we can ask him to ramp up the fanservice. as in, do any.”

you snort but before you can make some snarky comment about how that absolutely will not happen, a voice comes from behind you. “you’re signing a death wish with that. no way tsukki’ll bite.”

nakamura’s face sours and he mumbles something as kuroo towers over both of you. you grin at him in greeting and give him a playfully chastising look, adding, “you’re right but you know it’s rude to interrupt a conversation.”

“just making sure my wife—” he gives nakamura a very pointed look, “—knows who she’s dealing with.”

you quirk an eyebrow. “your wife is a very capable woman, thank you very much.”

he smirks and bends down closer, deepening his tone. “oh, i know.”

nakamura scowls. “we get it, she’s your work wife.”

“actually…” kuroo’s shit-eating grin grows wide like a cat who got the cream and simultaneously, both of you hold up your left hands, matching silver bands glinting under the fluorescent lights. “she’s my wife-wife now.”

[alt-vera]

— text me, texas ⁀➷

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joel miller worries that the girl he’s been seeing is holding out on him on purpose. she definitely isn’t.

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♡ | joel miller | 1.5k | ❛ text me texas - chris young ❜

warnings: pre!outbreak joel miller. outdoor oral (m!receiving). praise. fond nicknames being used. deep throating. age gap. mdni.

❝ it’s breaking my heart and i’m starting to get the message… c’mon and text me, texas ❞

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JOEL MILLER COULDN’T KEEP HIS EYES OFF OF HIS PHONE.

　Whether he was working, or making breakfast for Sarah, his flip phone was always in his peripheral vision. He didn’t even know if it was intentional anymore.

　It’d been a week since he heard from you. A week since the two of you had gone on a nearly disastrous date. A week since he’d gotten a text from you reading, “Talk 2 U L8er, cowboy”

　Texas and Cowboy. You were the one who started the nicknames, jokingly calling him cowboy when he’d come into the ER for some stitches he’d earned during work. Joel knew he shouldn’t be hitting on the resident more than a decade younger than him patching him up, but he loved the way the corners of your eyes crinkled as he cracked a ludic joke, and the way the tip of your tongue peeked out of the corner of your mouth as you honed in on your work.

　This lead to him asking for your number as you discharged him, and you saying yes for a reason Joel couldn’t figure out. Of course, your residency schedule wouldn’t allow for a date right away, something that wouldn’t happen for another two weeks after your fateful meeting, but it did allow for an abundance of phone calls between the two of you.

　Something that had become so routine for Joel that, with their current absence, had caused him a week of fitful, sleepless nights. Missing his texas that wasn’t really from Texas.

　Even now, as he and Tommy shot the shit sitting on the back of Joel’s shoddy wooden porch, beers in hand and cicadas buzzing a backtrack for their conversation, he couldn’t help but steal glances at the folded black device sitting on the table between them.

　“Maybe she’d finally come to her senses,” Tommy suggested with a shit-eating grin as he took a sip from the glass bottle in his hands. “Realized she could do better than a dirty ol’ contractor.”

　“Don’t talk as if your shit don’t stink,” Joel replied gruffly, calloused hands picking at the peeling label of his beer. “You’re in the exact same boat as i am. How is Ashley, by the way?”

　“Fuckin’ a lawyer,” Tommy replied with a roll of his eyes, a much more forceful sip being taken now. “Hey, maybe that’s why she hasn’t called you. She’s fuckin’ her doctor-supervisor whatever it’s called.”

　“Or maybe she’s been too busy patchin’ up dumbasses like yourself.”

　Your voice cut through the summer air, stunning the two men as they turned around to look at you. You leant against the sliding glass door, tank top wrinkled from being in your locker all day and jean shorts hanging low around your hips. Your hair was wild from being thrown up all day, shining in the setting sun as a six pack hung loosely in your hand.

　“Texas,” Joel said weakly, stunned to see you there.

　“Cowboy, Ranger,” You greeted respectively, smiling as you moved to stand in front of the two as you put the pack on the table. “Glad to know you two still think about me when i’m not around.”

　“I’ll take that as my cue to leave,” Tommy mumbled, face ruddy from being caught shit-talking. He placed his empty bottle on the table, fishing out a new one from the pack you brought. “I’ll be drinking this one at home, Doc. Thank ya.”

　You gave him a two-fingered salute as he stalked off, taking his chair and popping the cap off your beer. Joel’s mouth hung agape before he snapped to his senses, hand running over his stubbly jaw.

　“Tommy, y’know, he was just bullshittin’,” Joel mumbled, eyes trained on you, looking for any sort of indication that you were pissed. “Y’know I don’t think you’d do something like that.”

　You laughed heartily, which put Joel somewhat at ease. He melted into his chair just a bit, taking a quick swig.

　“I know, cowboy,” You teased the nickname. Your shorts rode up a bit as you shifted, and Joel fought himself not to stare. “My attending’s been up my ass this week, sticking me in the ER til i ran out of ice packs and stitchin’ thread. That’s why i’ve been so M.I.A.”

　Joel ignored your addressing of your silence, instead quirking his lips up into a teasing grin. “Meet any patients as charming as i was?”

　“Nope,” You replied, taking a swig of your own. “No one can beat the one and only Joel Miller.”

　Joel angled his body more towards yours, “Is that why you took it out of your busy schedule to come see me?”

　“Actually,” You said, wrist twirling as you stretched your soreness, “I have tomorrow off, so i thought i’d pay my dear cowboy a visit, seeing as i left him in radio silence for the past week.”

　“Yeah, darlin’, you can’t do that to an ol’ man like me,” Joel sighed, tracing the wood of his chair. He was never good at being vulnerable. “Made me think you were off, i dunno…”

　You picked up where he trailed off. “Fucking my doctor-supervisor whatever?”

　Joel shook his head, crows feet prominent as he squinted. “No, just that maybe… there was someone else.”

　“If you ever can’t call,” He continued, “You can always text me. Even though i don’t know how to text back, you can always… text me, texas.”

　“Well maybe I can make it up to you…”

　A sly smile danced on your lips as you sank from your chair and onto the balmy wood of the porch, crawling between Joel’s already spread legs. Your fingers traced the pattern on his bet buckle, doe eyes moving to stare up at him. “Sarah’s sleeping over at a friend’s house, right?”

　“Yes,” Joel’s voice came out as a broken sigh. His fingers came up to trace your jawline, rough pads leaving tingles on your smooth skin. “Y’know you don’t have to make it up to me, texas.”

　Your head cocked. “But i want to.”

　Those four simple words made Joel practically fall apart at the seams.

　You felt him relax into his chair, which you took as a signal to continue. You delicately palmed him through his tightening jeans, a groan of satisfaction leaving his lips as you did so. More confident in your actions now that you knew he was enjoying himself, you unbuckled his belt and jeans, pressing kisses to his clothed member.

　Joel’s fingers danced through your hair, pulling it into a makeshift ponytail as you pulled down his boxers, cock springing up against his dark tee to meet the gentle summer breeze. You spit into your hand, stroking him before smoothly taking him into your mouth.

　Joel could stare at you all day, Texas sunset painting your skin with warm hues, your cheeks hallowed as you took him the best you could, hand stroking what you couldn’t. It took everything in him not to bust the moment you got on your knees in front of him.

　“That’s it, darlin’,” He cooed, thumb absentmindedly stroking your cheek as you took him deeper, throat bobbing against him as you tried not to choke. “Just like that.”

　You pulled away for a breath, and he leant down and kissed you. Your palm still stroking the head of his cock as his tongue swirled with yours. He could taste himself on your tongue, the tang of precum mixed with beer.

　You pulled out from the kiss, smiling as you turned your full attention back to his cock, your tongue sticking out of the corner of your mouth as you focused on making him cum, just as it did when you did his sutures.

　Your muscle tickled his slit as you took him once again in your mouth, wrapping around him as you continued to go down. He groaned, large hand putting gentle pressure on the back of your skull as he encouraged you to take him in farther.

　“You can do it, baby. You can take it all.”

　His encouragement spurred you further, nose coming to meet the wiry hairs at his base as he fully went down your throat. You sputtered around him, but he held you in place, hips bucking up into your mouth.

　“Fuck, darlin’, i’m cumming.”

　His warning came out broken as he moaned, hot seed travelling down your throat and leaking out the side of your mouth. You pulled off once he was milked, using your thumb to collect the fluid that escaped, licking it clean.

　You tucked him back into his boxers and laid your cheek on his jean covered thigh, smiling up at him with a lopsided grin as he fondly played with your hair, tucking it behind your ears and massaging your scalp.

　Joel couldn’t stop himself from grinning back, lips curling as he playfully rolled his eyes. “That was one hell of an apology, texas.”

[rallentando1011]

Somnambulant Soulmates (rise Donnie x gn reader)

Prologue, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6

Word Count: 2833

“Where in the actual heck did you lead me?”

“Trying to figure that out right now. How many turns have you taken?”

“You mean to the left or right?” you inquired cautiously, steps splashing in the shallow water of the sewer tunnel you currently found yourself in. You thought that since you had taken this exact same path literally yesterday you might remember the way. Well, you thought wrong, which was why you called up the man you were on your way to meet for assistance.

Donnie huffed over the phone. “Both, preferably. Why would you go traversing through a complex labyrinth of a sewer system, not knowing where you’re going, and not keeping track of where you’ve gone?”

“Uhh, misguided faith in myself?”

“Eh. Fair enough. I’ll send auxiliary support your way.”

“‘Auxiliary support?’ What is that supposed to-”

Before you could even finish your thought, not to mention get a response, the call ended.

You gaped. Either the signal cut out, which was feasible in the sewers, or he ended the call. For Donnie’s sake, he’d better have hoped it was the former.

You froze in the eerie silence and dark, breathing tersely. Your hands hung uncomfortably off your sides, shoulders drawn tight.

What were you supposed to do now?

Well, retracing your steps seemed better than continuing further into uncharted territory. Following that logic, you pivoted and meandered cautiously back from where you came.

The tunnel came upon an especially dark section, so you turned on your phone’s flashlight. Your field of vision was small, but at least you could directly in front of you. Better than nothingness..

Suddenly, a strange noise entered your ears. Some sort of mechanical whirring. It sounded vaguely in front of you, though the reverberation from the tunnels made it hard to discern.

You tensed up again.

What if it was from those goons from last night? Or, even worse, what if it was-

As the source of the odd whirring sound came into view, you paused.

“Ohhhh my goodness…” Your startled reflexes swiftly softened as you registered the little purple drone levitating before you.

A very boop-able beak was on what you assumed to be its face, with petite propellers acting as limbs. Bottom line, it was adorable.

“Woah, how’s it hanging, dude?” the drone greeted. “D told me you got a bit turned around down here, but we’ll get you to the lair real quick.”

“Woah.” You admired the tech, tilting your head at it. “So, am I talking to Donnie or an algorithm right now?”

“Neither! The name’s S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. broski!” it- he introduced himself.

“Huh. Nice to meet you, S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.,” you responded and gave your name in return. “Would you mind please showing me to Donnie?”

“No problem!” the drone floated higher excitedly before whipping around. “Follow me. We’ll be back to the lab in a jiff.”

“Thanks!”

You trailed along the polite drone in silence, weaving and wandering through dim channels until he spoke up.

“So, you and D are cool?”

“Yeah, you could say that.” You tipped your head down inquisitively. 

“I don’t know what you see in him.”

You barked out a laugh at how abrupt his sass was. “Oh?”

“Yeah! He can be super overbearing sometimes- like, won’t-even-let-me-out-of-the-lair overbearing, you know? He’s gotten better about it, but he can still be way protective.”

“Surely it can’t be that bad,” you offered. The drone did not seem to agree.

“Oh, it can, bro! One time, he padlocked my propellers and I ended up in, like, a gang almost-”

As your conversation trailed off and you two moved, the area around you grew lighter and you found yourself in the empty atrium of the lair. S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. guided you up to the second floor, down a dim hallway, and to a stop in front of large, metallic doors as his rant about Donnie came to a close.

“Thanks, little guy. I appreciate the help.” You smiled, and the drone tilted his head and returned the gesture.

“Of course, bro! Just let me know if you get too bored with Donnie. Us cool people can hang out and do something less bogus.”

You chuckled. “I’ll let you know.”

With a small salute, you sent him whirring off.

You turned to face the sturdy-looking doors before you. Just as you moved to rap on them, the doors opened with a heavy sound of air. You took a confused glance to the right, left, before stepping into the lab.

The room consisted mostly of metallic silver hues with tables and shelves stacked up with a plethora of technological treasures. Purple mood lights illuminated the room softly, though it was still a lot more effective than your flashlight was.

Sounds of clinging and clanging proliferated from somewhere behind a shelf. You followed them, expecting to find your companion tinkering on something - perhaps the invention he was researching at the library?

Instead, you turned the corner to see him using the titanium arms that extended from his battle shell to swipe what was probably a literal ton of empty energy drinks off of his desk and into a trash can beside it.

You interrupted his tidying up with a cough to announce your presence.

Startled, he snapped his head back to look at you, his technology not ceasing to clear the irrelevant items from his desk.

“Oh. You made it. Congratulations,” he said, though his monotonous tone did not invoke any sentiment of felicitations.

“Yeah, I made it, little thanks to you.”

“I take it S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. behaved himself?”

“He was an angel.” You put a hand over your heart and walked up to him just as a thought struck you. “By the way, how did you know where to send S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.?”

“That is unimportant right now. What matters iiiis-” he paused to gesture to his desk, “-science! Engineering, to be more specific, but we can delve into that more later.”

“Hm.” You leaned over the desk, viewing a highly detailed blueprint and sheet of notes. The thought that he probably  definitely tracked your call faded as you immersed yourself in his work. “You mentioned a prototype of this yesterday?”

“I admire your tenacity, but would you not prefer to discuss the workings of the machine before seeing the results?” he queried.

“Is it not helpful to vary in learning techniques? I’m game for some visual learning.”

“Sigh, if you insist.”

Donnie turned around, delicately grabbed an object from a shelf beside him, set it down on the desk.

The metal object was spherical, for the most part, with some geometric patterns on the bottom to prop it up. It was sizable, though wieldy enough to be portable. On the side of it was an ingrained insignia you’d seen on his other tech, and beside that was an odd yet intentional divot in the side.

“About this prototype for the generator-” Donnie glanced to the side, “it’s been built, but I don’t have the juice for it yet.”

“So you don’t have the energy source for your energy source?”

He deadpanned at your teasing. “It’s a prototype for a reason.” 

“Is that dent where the mystic crystal or whatever is supposed to go?”

“Yes, it is intended to be for a crystal, though I’ll take any viable source I can get. Now, shall we discuss the behind the scenes?”

You nodded.

Before crashing into his own chair, he pulled up a stool for you. Oddly considerate, but you wouldn’t complain.

From talk of sinusoidal waves, frequencies, output and input responses from certain mystic crystals, the conversation went into a plenitude of tangentially related topics, the minutiae of which he had to explain to you, but you got the majority of it. However, such conversation came at a price, for one cannot blab and/or yap for an hour consecutively without obtaining a splitting headache and requiring sustenance.

Eventually, you cleared your throat to get his attention off of the blueprints for the energy source. The turtle met your gaze curiously.

“All this ‘being a genius’ stuff has left me positively parched,” you spoke up, popping the p’s. “You have anything to drink in here? Or is the lair’s kitchen better?”

It felt kind of weird to refer to his residence as a lair, but you were trying.

“This is a laboratory; it would be reprehensible to bring food or beverage in here.”

The two of you glanced down at the miniature trash can adjacent to his desk and the cans overflowing from it.

“Your trash begs to differ.”

He clicked his tongue. “Those cans are empty now, and I don’t have more. We probably have water in the fridge.”

“How about we go somewhere instead? Go for a walk, head to a cafe, get some fresh air. I would prefer not getting lost here again.”

Donnie hummed, tapped his chin.“Not a bad idea. You’re buying, though.”

“Sure!”

He blinked. “I was joking. Of course I’m going to buy my own beverage.”

“We’ll see,” you smiled, hopping up from your seat. “Do you want to grab a coat or something? The wind chill’s bad today.”

“Forcing me out of my lab for food, insisting I prepare for the weather, if I didn’t know better I might say you care about me.” Donnie raised a playful eyebrow.

“Don’t flatter yourself. And I haven’t forced you anywhere. For legal purposes.”

“You can wait here. I’ll be back in a moment.” Donnie hopped up and exited the lab, presumably to get some warmer clothes.

As he slipped out of the room, you traced a finger over the blueprints he had gushed over so adamantly. So much time and effort and knowledge had been poured into every aspect of this project, and that, not to mention the complexity of it, was enough to gain your respect. You pulled out your phone, snapped a quick picture of the paper, not the prototype for now, and slipped it back into your pocket.

You waited for an uncomfortable moment, literally twiddling your thumbs, trying to seem casual. There was a literal trove of things to check out or explore in the room, but you did not know how much time you had. 

And you couldn’t risk getting caught.

So you waited. And waited.

Okay, either Donnie ditched you or he just took forever to get ready.

Thinking back to how late he was to April’s party heavily implied the latter.

After another moment of just standing next to his desk, the sound of footsteps padding closer drew your attention up.

Lo and behold, in the doorway stood Donnie with crossed arms.

His mask and goggles remained the same, steadfast on his head, but he did put on some clothes. A snug black turtleneck and flowy lavender cargo pants had joined the ensemble, though there was still a severe lack of shoes.

“Okay, Steve Jobs.” The comment slipped out of your mouth before you could process it. It came across lightheartedly enough, though, based on Donnie’s grin.

“Don’t say that if you don’t mean it, because that’s going straight up here.” He tapped his index to his temple and started walking out of the lab. You followed after.

“I guess with all that square footage something’s bound to go up there.”

He wrinkled his nose in distaste.

You elbowed

“I’m kidding. Your brain capacity is bound to be maxed out already with all that knowledge.”

“Thanks? That- wasn’t derogatory, right?”

“What do you think?”

“That you’re patronizing me?”

“Sort of. I was mostly calling you smart, in a roundabout way.”

“Huh. So, thanks?”

“Welcome.”

You two quickly made your way out of the lair and onto the surface’s streets.

You realized just as quickly that you had no idea where you were headed to.

“Uhh, D?”

“I know. Unless you have other suggestions, I know a place nearby.”

“Oh, yeah, please lead the way. I genuinely had no idea where to go.”

“Ha,” he grinned, taking the lead down a few streets and corridors and bringing you two to a quaint coffee shop. String lights, beige bricks, sleek tables and booths, the store was modern and comely.

Of course, with it being New York City, the line was huge, but this place was concealed well enough that it at least wasn’t down the road.

While waiting in line, you didn’t talk much, instead opting to either scroll on your phones or try to figure out which kind of coffee or tea you wanted.

As you neared the register, still having no idea what you wanted, you passed the small refrigerated shelf of items.

“Oh, I’ve seen these before!” Your attention caught on some bottles of Yakult, so you selected one of the original flavors. “Never tried it though. Want to try it together?”

“Why not?” he grinned uncertainly and flashed a couple of thumbs up.

“That’s the spirit!”

You two made it to the register and ended up buying the probiotic drinks along with a couple of baked goods. Before he could make a move to pay for at least his items, you swooped in and bought them all with an innocent grin.

His glare saw through your unassuming demeanor.

You got your confections and drinks before making your way to an available booth. You took up a seat across from him and tried the new drink.

“I like it.” You nodded. It was citrusy, smooth, overall pleasant to indulge in.

“Oh. Mmmm…” he shuddered, forcing it down with a queasy smile on his face.

“Huh. You hate it,” you observed bemusedly. You relished the panic that washed over him at your comment.

“What? Nooo. This- this is very… not bad,” he faltered under your smug stare.

“It’s fine!” you reassured as you slid his Yakult toward yourself. “You don’t have to drink it if you don’t like it.”

“But-” he interjected, glancing down at the accursed drink, then back up to you. “But you bought it for me. I hardly consider it amiable to discard something that someone else purchased.”

“Well, luckily for us both, it’s not going to waste.”

Before he had the opportunity to ask you to elaborate, you took a long sip of the probiotic beverage. You smiled while doing so, coming face to face with a floored turtle when you set it back down on the table.

He stared numbly at you before stammering out, “I- you- do you have any idea how many germs we just shared?” 

“Oh well,” you shrugged. “Despite the atrocious things that come out of it, I think you have a fairly clean mouth. Now, how about we get you something else to drink? Something that you don’t find atrocious.”

“Fine, but I’ll be paying for it this time.”

You smiled knowingly, hand already fastened on your wallet. “We’ll see.”

The grin stayed smugly planted on your face as you made it to the front counter and slapped your payment down before he could.

“You’re just gonna have to settle with buying next time,” was your response to his scowl.

“Next time?” Donnie seemed taken aback.

You shrugged playfully. “Unless you don’t want to do this again. I’m good either way.”

“Um, no, n-next time’s on me,” he said hesitantly.

“Alright then. Do you want to tell the barista what you want?” you urged, indicating toward a visibly disinterested worker behind the counter.

“Right!” Donnie finally made it back onto this plane of reality and sprung into action, making his selection from the refrigerated section beside the counter.

“Flavorless juice?” Your jaw dropped as he slid it to the worker.

“Uh, yeah? They’ve got the good kind here. 50% less flavor…”

“Okay then…” you opted to judge him silently and let the man enjoy his juice, albeit an atrocious variety of juice.

You started walking back to the booth before a notification on your phone made you pause. Taking it out, your eyes widened.

“Oh, uh, I spent a lot longer with you than I thought I did. Um, I’ve got to go now, but I’ll catch you later?”

“Y-Yeah! Later!”

You left him standing there with a smile and a couple of finger guns before bounding off toward the exit and out of his view.

Once you left his field of vision, he looked back down at his drink. The drink you bought for him. The drink you spent additional time and money on to get for him just because he couldn’t texturally handle the other one you’d bought him.

What you mentioned earlier about doing this again sounded quite nice.

Perhaps, instead of waiting for fate or probability or whatever was at play to cause you to run into each other again, it could be a more active endeavor, something conscious.

That didn’t sound half bad to him.

(chapter artwork HERE)

Taglist~ @rottmntsimp

@envyjmoney

[mbakuetshurisprincess]

A Betting Woman

AN: Hey y’all! So I’m trynna do some palate cleansers while I work on BTB3 cause lord is that one just emotionally taxing to create lol. 80% of this fic is just Riri and Shuri talking about you and how they view you so there's that. This was heavily inspired by the wonderful work of @generallysapphic who is thee supreme when it comes to Shuriri postings. There's someone else who wrote a Shuriri fic but I can’t find them anymore. Just some cute shit to post fr. Set on a timeline where you went with Shuri to defeat Namor but Riri is a super genius. 

Summary: Normally these types of moral dilemmas don’t bother Riri but after meeting your girlfriend, the queen of Wakanda. Riri decides to pay you a visit to end things. 

Pairing: Shuri x Fem!Reader, Riri x Fem!Reader and the beginnings of Shuri x Riri.

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of D/S dynamic, kissing, i think thats it. 

Translation: Sthandwa - my love , Entle - Beautiful & Usana - baby. 

Word count: 2,864 

Suggested listening: WILSHIRE - Tyler, The Creator. 

“It's morals I really have, it's lines I could never cross But you got somethin' that make All them good intentions get lost I try to keep it together, never felt this way”

Riri knocked quickly on the door three times, rocking on her heels as she did it. 

“Busy right now!” Someone called from the other side of the door. The genius didn’t know if the voice was yours or not but she didn’t care.

‘Oh no, that bitch did not.’ Riri thought to herself. She brought her fist to the door and knocked harder this time. Everything was always on your schedule and Riri was going to be damned if her ending this fling was on your time too. She heard some rustling around and the bed creek before the door opened up enough to reveal a person on the other side. 

The person Riri was expecting to see behind your dorm door was you, it was your room after all. Instead, she was met by the exact person she was here to talk to you about, Shuri. The taller woman stood in your doorway leaning up against the post. She was wearing a black sports bra and a matching pair of black sweats with golden embroidery on the side. The sweatpants hung low on her waist and Riri could make out the band of Shuri’s boxers. ‘She’s a Calvin Klein girl huh,’ The thought came to the mechanic quicker than she could stop it and she mentally cursed herself for getting so off track. 

“Riri Williams, right?” Shuri tilted her head to the side, allowing the name to roll off her tongue. 

Riri’s eyes flashed over Shuri’s figure one more time before she finally pulled herself together. “Yeah that’s me,” She cleared her throat. “Is uh Y/N here?” Riri tried to look further into the room but Shuri blocked her movements with her body. 

This unintentionally gave the younger girl an opportunity to ogle at the Queen’s perfectly sculpted abs and steal a glance at her waistline again, so she wasn’t complaining. 

“No Y/N is busy right now, can it wait?” 

Snapping back into the conversation Riri finally got back to her original plan. “No it really can’t wait, I’ve been needed to talk to her about this.” 

Shuri pondered over Riri’s words for a few moments looking her up and down as she did. Riri wondered if she might melt under Shuri’s gaze. Something about the monarch was slowly starting to make her weak in the knees. She averted her eyes back down to the floor, once again sneaking glances at Shuri’s body as she did. 

“Well I’m sure whatever you wanted to tell her, you can tell me and I’ll relay the message,” Shuri suggested. She had noticed the way Riri was staring at her and decided to play into it. “Is it normal for American girls to make it this obvious when they’re checking someone out, or is it just you?”

Riri snapped her head back up to meet Shuri’s eyes, “What!? I wasn’t- Why would you say that? No, I wasn’t! '' Riri slowly started panicking.

Had she really been that blatant in her staring that the queen would notice? And this was totally not what she came here for or what she had rehearsed saying. 

Shuri relished seeing Riri’s cheeks flush with a dark red blush as she tried to regain herself. “Ah. No matter.” Shuri said with a smile. “What is it that you wanted to tell Y/N?” 

‘No fucking way.’ Riri thought to herself. ‘No fucking way did I just get bested at my own game! Bitch had me stuttering over MY words when I came here to end shit with HER girlfriend. I can’t go out like that.’ 

Riri opened her mouth to speak, after brainstorming something logical like ‘No I need to talk to her in person.’ or ‘I literally have her location and know she’s here right now. I need to speak with her.’ All of those would have been rational things to say but instead what came out of Riri’s mouth was fueled by nothing but good old-fashioned Chicago pride. 

“I’m fucking your girlfriend.” She blurted out.

Shuri tilted her head to the side and chuckled lightly before turning around and closing the door behind her. Riri was left standing in the dormitory hallway staring at the now-closed door. What the fuck was she thinking?? Telling the Queen of arguably the most powerful nation in the world that you were not just seeing her girlfriend, but FUCKING her? Surely that was enough to get her killed and probably in a way no one would know. She would just slowly fade out of the popular consciousness until no one remembered her name; all over some pussy. Great pussy at that, but still. She was roused from her thoughts by the door opening and Shuri standing on the other side once again. 

“I know you’re ‘fucking my girlfriend.’” She said the last part in air quotations with a chuckle. “Are you going to come in so we can finally discuss this or just stand outside confused?” 

The question caught Riri off guard and she stood there staring at Shuri, unsure of what her next move should be. She hadn’t planned for this at all. She had expected to come to your dorm room today and completely end things with you. Normally she didn’t have an issue with sleeping with people who were cheating on their partners. That was someone else’s moral dilemma not hers. But after interacting with Shuri today while she was a guest speaker at a lab on campus, the guilt started eating her alive. 

Eventually, Shuri got bored of waiting and grabbed Riri’s shoulder pulling the small girl into the dorm room and shutting the door behind her. 

“Come in and sit down.” Shuri walked back over to the bed and hopped onto it. When Riri didn’t move it prompted Shuri to speak again. “Do not act like you do not know her room entle, make yourself at home.” 

Riri wanted to ask what entle meant but decided that was the least of her problems right now. She made her way over to the bean bag in the opposite corner of the room and sunk down into it. She could hear the sound of the shower running in the bathroom connected to your dorm and assumed that's where you were since your location had pinged as here, yet you weren't in the room currently. 

“She shouldn’t take too long,” Shuri said noticing where Riri’s line of sight was going. “We can wait till she gets here or you can ask whatever you’d like to ask now.” 

The younger girl shifted in her seat and contemplated what Shuri had proposed. “I’ll wait for Y/N to get out of the shower.” 

Shuri nodded and picked back up the book that was lying on the bed. Riri watched Shuri intently as she read. How was she being so cool right now? Sitting in the same room as your girlfriend's lover would typically draw a stronger reaction out of the average person but the royal seemed to be in a very relaxed state. 

‘Duh’ Riri thought to herself, it’s because Shuri already knew. She had told Riri already so her presence couldn't have been that much of a surprise to her. This thought in turn only raised more questions for Riri. 

‘How long had she known?’

‘Was she upset with Y/N?’ 

And most importantly,

‘How much did she really know?’ 

Shuri looked up from her book and caught Riri staring at her once again, which must be a theme for the night. Riri cleared her throat and spoke. “I change my mind, I’d like to ask my questions and you answer them.” She paused, “Right now.” 

Shuri chuckled at the girl's forwardness. “Y/N did say you didn’t have much patience, I see she wasn’t lying about that… Among other things,” 

Riri swore when Shuri said it she caught Shuri looking her up and down. Shuri didn’t even give her enough time to react before continuing. “But go ahead, I’ll do my best to answer them.” 

“How long have you known about us?” 

“Since the beginning,” Shuri replied simply. 

“And you’re not mad?” Riri questioned, sitting up in the bean bag chair.

“Why would I be?” Shuri questioned back with a genuine look of confusion on her face. 

Shuri’s look of confusion was replicated on Riri after hearing her answer and seeing the woman's face. “Uhh, because while you’re in Wakanda saving the world and shit, I’m here with two fingers buried deep in your girl!” 

“Just two? Normally she likes three but whatever works for you guys really.” Shuri’s sarcasm left Riri’s mouth agape and which only fueled Shuri’s laughter. Once she had pulled herself together Shuri apologized and said she would actually answer Riri’s question, earning a huff of agitation from her. 

“You already answered your question in your question, entle.” Once again Shuri spoke coolly and used that entle word that Riri couldn’t understand. 

“What the hell does that even mean!” Riri sucked her teeth as she spoke. “No more weird shit, no more nicknames in other languages, just explain this shit to me 'cause it’s not making any sense.” 

Shuri nodded, understanding that Riri did deserve the full story. She wanted to wait for you to come out of the shower but the combination of not knowing exactly how much longer you were going to take and her sensing Riri’s agitation; she was compelled to speak. 

“What I mean by that is you gave yourself the answer already. Y/N is here for school for most of the year and I’m kept busy looking after Wakanda. My love has needs that unfortunately due to the distance most of the time I cannot fill. She’s permitted to fulfill these needs in any way she chooses, as am I.”

Riri looked dumbfounded once again as she digested Shuri’s words. “So you’ve known this whole time?” 

“Mhm.”

“About everything?” 

“Pretty much yeah.” Shuri tapped her fingers on her stomach where they lay interlaced. 

“Even the sex?” Riri probed. There was no way Shuri was just so chill about this. 

Shuri was humored, sensing that Riri was hoping to incite an angry response. “Yes, even the sex. Of which I only heard good things about so I must give you credit Ms.Williams, you kept my girl satisfied.” 

The blush returned to Riri’s face and she felt her lips creep into a smile upon hearing Shuri’s praise. Her cocky side came out and she decided to get smart. “You weren't worried I was gonna take her from you?”

“Oh, not for one second. Y/N’s collared, she’s not going anywhere anytime soon.” Shuri replied confidently. Seeing Riri’s confusion she moved her hand down to the necklace resting on her chest; holding it up before letting it fall back down. “Never noticed her necklace? I know she doesn't take it off.” 

Riri’s mind flashed images of you and to Shuri’s credit in all of the scenes, a golden necklace with a small claw was hanging from your neck. Even in the ones where Riri’s head was buried between your thighs and your head was thrown back as you cam-

‘Focus Riri!’ She thought to herself. 

“So she’s your submissive?” Riri clarified.

“Wow, you are pretty smart. Maybe you do live up to that genius title after all.” Shuri quipped with a smirk. “But yes, Bast has gifted me with an amazing girlfriend and sub.”  

Riri desperately wanted to make a smart remark back at the royal but she stifled it in favor of getting more information about your dynamic Shuri. What she had learned thus far intrigued and turned her on. “And she listens to you, a hundred percent of the time?” 

“A hundred and fifty percent of the time.” Shuri corrected her. “Does she not do the same for you?”

“Hell fuckin no she does not!” Riri exclaimed. “There is not a bone in that girl's body that knows how to listen, everything with her is a fight.” 

“My Y/N? Never. She knows better than to even make me repeat myself.” Shuri was baffled at what Riri had said but also intrigued at the idea of seeing a more bratty side of you.

“I don’t believe it, she’s not physically capable of listening.” Riri tapped the side of her head to mimic how hard-headed you acted with her. 

The sound of the shower turning off, signifying your arrival soon gave Shuri an idea. “Do you want me to show you just how well she listens?” 

A smirk slipped onto Riri’s face as she picked up on Shuri’s idea. “Yeah I do, show me how well your girl listens.” 

Shuri let out a puff of air along with her laugh and nodded. You stepped out of the bathroom looking down at something on your towel. 

Let the show begin.

Your bathroom door was on the wall that ran parallel to where your bed was, so when you looked up you were first met with Shuri. “Whew! I needed that baby, I don’t think I was conscious for the first ten minutes of that shower.” You beamed as you made your way over to the bed, still unaware of Riri’s presence in the room. 

“Of course sthandwa. And more to come tonight, you know that. We wouldn’t want to be rude to our guests before that though. Why don’t you go say hello to our friend.” Shuri nodded past you and to the corner. 

You spun around confused at what “friend” Shuri was referring to and immediately alarm bells began ringing in your head. There sat Riri, looking calm as ever manspreading on your bean bag chair. 

“What’s up ma.” She said with a smirk. 

“Oh fuck no.” You murmured under your breath. Never in your life did you expect to mix your worlds like this. Sure both women had known about the other but never in a million years had you imagined them to be in the same room together. You instantly started moving towards the bathroom door, hoping to lock yourself in and formulate a plan without being under either woman's gaze. 

Of course, Shuri calling out a strong “Stop.” ended all hopes of that as a means of escape. “Go give Riri a kiss, I’ve taught you better manners than that.” 

You looked back at your girlfriend as if she had lost her mind. Yes, you had told her every detail about your relationship with Riri and described the sex in explicit detail. But to kiss her in front of Shuri? Something about that felt so wrong it was right. 

“You know I won’t repeat myself without punishment, usana. Go.” Shuri gestured over to Riri who was taking the whole scene in. She watched as you shifted your weight between your feet, debating if you would listen to Shuri. If Riri was a betting woman, she would have bet her entire life savings at that moment that you wouldn’t listen. 

Good thing Riri didn’t like to bet. 

You walked over to Riri and gave her a small smile, slightly embarrassed knowing that Riri just watched you fold to Shuri. “Hi.” 

“So you do know how to listen the first time?” Riri concluded, the smirk still on her face. 

“Only when the right person asks me.” You maintained, crossing your arms across your chest to keep the towel from falling. Shuri heard your response and let out a light laugh and a “Be nice my love.” 

“You heard what your girlfriend said though ma, gimme me a kiss.” Riri sat up in the beanbag chair awaiting you to make the move. 

You looked back at Shuri one more time, kissing other girls had never been an issue for you before but for some reason doing it in front of her felt different. Secretly it turned you on to know that your girlfriend not only ordered but encouraged you to kiss Riri. 

Fuck it. 

You bent down and Riri pulled your face to hers so that your lips met. As soon as they touched Riri hungrily devoured them savoring the taste of you. By now you knew her style and you opened your mouth slightly so her tongue could come in and meet yours. Shuri watched from the bed as you two made out, turned on by the hunger you both displayed. She could tell the two of you were getting into it, Riri especially as she brought her other hand up to cup your cheek.

Deciding this was the perfect opportunity to prove her point Shuri ordered. “Step back Y/N.” 

Once again if Riri could bet she would have bet her life on the fact that you wouldn’t pull away. You loved kissing and she could tell that you were especially enjoying this little makeout session by the way your chest was heaving up and down. 

And once again it was a good thing Riri didn’t bet often. 

You unlatched your lips from Riri’s and stood back up, taking a few steps back in the process. Riri’s eyes flashed between yours and Shuri’s unable to believe what had just happened. 

“Told you she could listen.”

[msmargaretmurry]

18 matthew/leon

18 - things you said when you were scared

(cw for being outed)

In the video, Matthew is instantly recognizable: his curls, wild and golden in the sunshine; his dimpled grin; that stupid Elbo Room t-shirt. His companion is less recognizable, all swim trunks and thick muscle, dark wet hair slicked back from the pool. Over the course of the nine-second clip, Matthew, in the video, tugs this man in and kisses him briefly, then pulls back to say something, then laughs as he’s kissed by the man, longer and more thoroughly. The man has a great ass, and Matthew’s hands find it eagerly as they shift out of view. The cameraperson tries for a moment to find a new angle that works through the foliage and fencing, then gives up. That’s it.

Apparently the Bahamas aren’t far enough to go for some privacy.

While Matthew paces in the bedroom of their rented condo with what seems like his entire family including his uncle-agent on speakerphone, Leon sinks as deep into the couch as is humanly possible, watching the video on repeat in the Tweet that gave it to the world. Leon knows the exact moment it was taken, because it was only yesterday. It would be a hot video if it weren’t so horrifying. They look good together. Matthew looks so happy.

It should be more of a relief that the video doesn’t include a good shot of his face. Instead Leon just feels guilty that Matthew’s the only one getting blown up about it. Feels anxious, waiting for someone to figure it out. Feels nauseous, waiting for what Matthew will say when he emerges from his conference call. Most of what Leon gets through the door is Matthew’s side of the conversation — “I don’t know, I don’t know,” he keeps saying, his voice pitched high, tight with stress. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he keeps saying. “That part doesn’t matter,” a bunch of times in a row, then in an exasperated burst: “That’s none of your business. That’s nobody’s business.”

Leon has no idea who Matthew told his family he was going on vacation with. He just knows it wasn’t him. That’s fine. That’s how it’s supposed to be. 

After an eternity, the bedroom door flies open and Matthew stomps into the main room to start furiously gathering his things.

“I’m going home,” he bites out. 

Leon sits up so quickly his head spins a little. “Sorry, what?”

Matthew doesn’t even pause. He grabs his hoodie from the back of the sofa, his flip-flops from by the door. “There’s a flight tonight, I can make it if I pack fast.”

“”You’re leaving.”

“Um, obviously. My mom’s upset, my dad’s confused, we need to figure out what to do next—”

“Okay, yeah, but what about me?”

Matthew finally whirls to look at him. “What about you?”

It’s like a slap in the face.

“Wow,” says Leon. “Fuck you, too, I guess.”

Matthew deflates. “I didn’t mean it like that,” he says, and rubs a hand over his face, through his hair. “Fuck.”

“No, it’s fine, I get it.” And he does get it, really. Matthew’s life just got rocked, not Leon’s. And it’s not like this is serious, between them. If it was serious, Matthew’s parents wouldn’t be asking who the guy in the video is. Leon’s parents would know where he is right now. When they’d made the plans, Matthew had laughed and said, a lot of effort just to fuck. Leon had grinned and said, yeah, but I’ll make it worth your while.

Leon rocks to his feet and heads for the bedroom. He might as well start packing.

“Leon—” Matthew says, following after him. “I’m sorry, okay? I don’t have time to have this fight right now.”

“We’re not fighting,” Leon says. “You’re leaving, so there’s no point in me staying, so I’m leaving, too.”

“Fuck you,” says Matthew. “You don’t get to be pissed at me right now.”

He’s right. And Leon’s not pissed, not really. Not at Matthew. At whoever did this. A couple of barely-famous hockey players aren’t the kind of people this shit is supposed to happen to. Barely even barely famous. Matthew was right on the phone with his family — it’s not anyone’s business.

“You’re right,” Leon says with a sigh. “I’m sorry. You’re right. Come here.”

Matthew is tense all over, but he lets Leon fold him into a hug. Leon rubs his back, kisses the side of his head, tries not to wonder if this is the last time they’ll ever do this.

“Sorry,” Leon says again.

Matthew exhales wetly against his neck. “I have to leave. I can’t be here. You know I hate people getting in my business. I can’t—”

“I know, I know, I know,” Leon says. He hugs Matthew tighter as his stomach ties itself in knots. 

“I’ll figure out what to tell people,” Matthew mumbles, his fingers curling into Leon’s shirt. “I can just say it was some guy I met here — maybe I wanted a vacation alone or something, I don’t know— I mean, my parents will hate that, they want me to have a secret nice boyfriend or something so we can trot him out and be like, look, still totally wholesome, nothing to see here—”

“Okay,” Leon says.

There’s a beat, and then Matthew pulls back to look at him with a frown. “Okay what?”

“I just mean, if it’s easier that way.” Leon’s brain catches up with what’s coming out of his mouth, and his cheeks are suddenly hot. “I mean. If you need me to be a boyfriend. If that would help. I can do that.”

Matthew stares. “I don’t— I can’t ask you to do that.”

“Did you ask?” Leon says. “No. I’m just saying. If you want.”

It’s probably a very stupid offer. The kind of offer that could blow up Leon’s life in ways he’s only ever thought about as vague, distant what-ifs. The kind of offer you’re supposed to offer only if it’s serious. Definitely the kind of offer he should think about for more than five seconds, but none of that seems particularly important right now.

Matthew sags into the hug again, holding on even tighter than before. Leon squeezes him, kisses his hair, breathes in the smell of the ocean.

“At the very least let me help you pack,” he murmurs. Matthew lets out a long, shaky breath, his fingers digging into Leon’s back.

“Maybe I can fly out in the morning instead.”

[svechnikovvv]

when in chicago

pairing: quinn hughes x actress!fem!reader

warning: profanity

summary: chicago was a magical place sometimes

a/n: i’ve binged 11 episodes of chicago pd today, so that inspired this. also, this is just so you guys can have some sort of content out there.

masterlist: here

*in this, the character you play is, hmmm let’s say detective amelia thompson*

“okay, camera’s rolling in one… two… three!” you quickly get into character.

“jay,” you say warningly before he gives you a kiss, then pulling back.

“amelia,” he says in the same tone.

“you know what will happen if voight finds out.” he gives you another kiss

“lucky us, he won’t.” he smirks down at you

“he’s a fucking detective. he’s gonna find out.” you harshly whisper, turning your back to him and going back to making your coffee. his arms wrap around your waist and he rests his head on your shoulder.

“look, babe, i have it all under control.”

“the last time you said that to me, you lost my cat.” you then hear footsteps nearing and you & jesse quickly separate as you finish making the coffee.

“morning sarge,” you call out, getting a grunt in response. you then give jesse a pointed look and walk out the small office. the director then calls cut and you find somewhere to set down the mug. jesse walks over to you and sits down on the edge of the desk.

“what do you have planned tonight?” he asks you

“nothing, honestly.” he nods

“be ready at 6.” you raise a brow at him

“jesse, are you taking me on a date?” he shakes his head

“it’s a surprise.” you roll your eyes

“what’s the dress code?” he shrugs

“causal, but warm.” you give him a skeptical look, but are cut off by the director telling you to get in your places. the rest of filming goes by smoothly and around 5, you all call it a day.

“i’ll be at your place in an hour. that sound good to you?” you nod your head at jesse and he bids you goodbye as you both go your separate ways. your hair was wavy from the stylists on set, so you figured you’d keep it this way for whatever he had planned.

causal, but warm. what does that even mean? you rummage through your closet and grab a pair of jeans, your favorite pair to be exact. you pair them with a black v-neck and your converse. okay, so there’s casual. now, the warm part. you find a light, white jacket and add it to the outfit. giving yourself a pat on the back, you change into the outfit. 40 minutes until you have to leave.

to pass the time, you make yourself a light snack and catch up on some reading. soon, knocks echo throughout your apartment and you get up, unlocking the door and swinging it open.

“ready?” you nod and lock up your place behind you, heading out the apartment complex and to jesse’s car.

“seat warmers asap.” you rub your hands together and buckle up your seatbelt. before jesse drives away, he reaches into his backseat and grabs a bag, setting it in your lap.

“what is it?”

“just open it.” you open the bag and pull out a quinn hughes jersey. you gasped and looked at him, mouth agape. maybe you let it slip one drunken night that you had something for the canucks’ defenseman. you didn’t think anyone would remember it, though.

“they’re playing against the blachawks tonight and i thought you should have a jersey to wear to the game.”

“what do you mean wear to the game?” he then holds up two tickets to the canucks v blackhawks game and you went silent. you then reached across the console and engulfed him in a hug. he laughs and then you sit back down in your seat.

“now we should get going before our seats get cold.” you laugh at his awful joke and he pulls out of his parking spot, heading to the arena.

when you arrive, there’s already a lot of people flooding in. you and jesse navigate your seats and get comfortable.

before the first period starts, your and jesse’s face light up on the jumbotron.

“from chicago pd, please welcome jesse lee soffer & y/n l/n.” a lot of people cheer and the two of you smile and wave.

soon, the first period is underway and you see that familiar number 43 that, until now, you’ve only seen on your tv skate out onto the ice.

“there’s your man,” jesse nudges you, and you hit him playfully as he laughs.

“he probably has no clue who the hell i am.”

“he’ll know who you are after tonight.”

“what do you mean by that?”

“just that i pulled a couple strings so you could meet them after the game.” your eyes go wide and he shrugs. you squint your eyes at him.

“you want something. why else would you be kissing ass?”

“can i not be an amazing friend?”

“i’ll let it slide this once.” you two go back to watching the game and right before the first period ends, beauvillier scores a goal and you stand up and cheer. the buzzer then goes off, signaling the end of the first.

“you cheer this loud at home?” jesse asks and you nod

“a lot louder, actually.”

“i find it hard to believe that you can cheer louder than you just did.” you roll your eyes and jesse gets up

“i’m going to grab a drink. you want anything?” you shake your head and he nods as you keep yourself occupied with your phone. you feel a light tap to your shoulder and you turn around to see a little girl no older than 9 standing there shyly.

“hi, what can i do for you?” you smile at her and she looks up at the older man standing beside her that you didn’t even notice.

“she watches the show and loves detective thompson.” your heart warm at the words and you look at her.

“do you want a picture?” she nods and you turn in your seat and she comes and stands beside you.

“what’s your name?”

“amelia.” now it makes sense why she likes you so much. your character has the same name as her.

“like detective thompson,” you say and she nods.

“okay amelia, let’s smile.” the two of you smile up at the camera and her father takes a picture.

“what do you say, sweetie?”

“thank you,” she says and you nod. they then walk away and jesse’s back beside you.

“met your first fan of the night?”

“a nine year old girl named amelia.” he chuckles

“how ironic.” you nod. the two of you continue to converse and before you know it, the second period starts. the blackhawks managed to score, tying the game. the rest of the second goes by and nobody else scores. it’s down to the third period and pettersson scores for the canucks, giving them a 2-1 lead. but then someone else on the blackhawks score and the game’s tied yet again.

looks like they’re going into OT because the buzzer goes off. end of regulation.

you see that quinn is on the ice and the puck is being passed to him. now you’re on the edge of your seat. he moves it down the ice and he goes to shoot and you feel yourself holding your breath.

he makes it in.

you stand up and erupt into cheers just as he skates over and makes eye contact with you. he points at you and you point back at yourself, brows raised. he nods and tosses his stick over the glass and you catch it, looking at jesse with a shocked face.

“you look like a kid on christmas.” you nod

“i feel like one.” he laughs and you look at the stick in disbelief. jesse then stands with you and the two of you look for some kind of guard and when you find one, jesse flashes the pass he has and they let you by. you bet you look like gandalf walking around with a hockey stick.

the players start to trickle out of the locker room slowly and soon you lock eyes with quinn. his brows furrow slightly and he walks over.

“thanks for the stick, by the way.” you say and he smiles, nodding.

“you were the first person sporting a canucks jersey—mine at that—that i saw and the adrenaline rush took over, i guess.” you let out a quiet laugh

“i’m sorry, where are my manners? i’m y/n l/n and this is my costar jesse soffer.”

“costar?” he questions and you nod

“we’re from chicago pd.”

“that cop show,” it’s like pieces connect and you nod.

“my mom’s a big fan. you mind if i take a picture with you two?” your jaw slightly drops and jesse nudges you, making you break out of your trance and you nod. quinn laughs and hands his phone to elias who happens to be walking by.

“can you take a picture?” he nods and jesse stands at one side of quinn as you stand on the other. he snaps a couple photos before handing quinn his phone back and saying his goodbyes.

“i was wondering if i could get a picture too?” quinn nods

“absolutely.” you hand your phone to jesse and quinn throws his arm around your shoulders. you’re now realizing how he has some inches on you. you scoot closer to him and jesse snaps some photos before he nods and hands you back your phone.

“well, the two of us have to get going, but it was nice to meet you, quinn. thanks again for the stick.” he nods and the three of you say goodbye to one another. before you even get to round the corner to head to the exit, quinn calls your name. you turn around and walk over to him.

“yeah?”

“i was wondering if i could get your number?” he sheepishly rubs the back of his neck and you feel your heart do cartwheels. you nod and put your number in his phone and he smiles, before saying goodbye for real this time. you join jesse again and now you two head towards the exit.

“what was that about?” he asks as you’re leaving through the doors.

“i may or may not have just gotten his number.” jesse stops in his tracks and looks at you.

“for real?” you nod excitedly

“i told you you’d get your man.” you roll your eyes and set the hockey stick in the back of jesse’s car, sliding back into the passenger seat. he takes you back to your place and you tell him goodnight.

you were settled in bed when your phone pinged, lighting up your pitch-black room.

1 notification

hey, it’s quinn. mom said she can die happily now that you know she exists

you laugh at the message and shoot a text back before you turn your phone on silent, heading to sleep. when you wake up in the morning, you see another text from quinn.

good morning :) our plane boards at 12, so i was wondering if you wanted to catch some coffee before i left?

you smiled at his sweet text and told him to meet you at the cafe you and the cast went to sometimes.

when you get there, quinn’s sitting down in the back with a cup in front of him. you order your drink then make your way over to him, taking a seat in front of him.

“there you are,” he smiles.

“wouldn’t be anywhere else.” the two of you continue to talk about anything and everything and he’s such a sweet guy. you still don’t know why in the world he asked for your number, but you’re glad he did.

he checked the time on his phone and got up.

“i have to leave now, i’m sorry. but i’ll text you, okay?” you nod and he gives you a hug bye. his cologne was comforting and you just wanted to stay there forever. you order another coffee and make your way to set.

“woah, you look like a sad puppy. what happened to you?” patrick asks as you take a seat beside him.

“something tells me a certain someone had to leave.” you shoot jesse a look and he holds up his hands.

“i’m sorry, who?” patrick asks

“you know that hockey player y/n likes a lot?” patrick nods

“quinn hughes, right?” jesse nods and gives patrick a look before he prices things together.

“you’re seeing him?” he gasps out and you shrug

“i mean, we’ve been texting and we got coffee this morning before his plane boarded.” as if on cue, your phone dinged and you looked down to see quinn sent you a picture of an advertisement for chicago pd at the airport.

thinking of you

you can’t help but smile at the text and patrick rips your phone out your hand, gasping. he then hands it to jesse and jesse looks at you, smirking.

“are we playing hot potato? no. give me my phone.” you take it back from them “you two are like children.”

“but you love us,” patrick says and you give him a side-eye.

months pass and quinn and you texted everyday. somewhere around the second month of talking, he asked you to be his girlfriend. to say the least, you were over the moon. you haven’t seen him since he left chicago that one day. so to say you missed him would be an understatement. 

“cut! okay everyone, take a break.” you walked off set and made your way to where the snack table was. you’d been eyeballing the plate of strawberries. you grabbed yourself a bowl and loaded it with them, your stomach growling loudly. 

you then felt a tap on your shoulder and you turned around to see quinn standing there. your jaw drops and you set your strawberries down, engulfing him in a hug. he smiles and wraps his arms around you, resting his head on your shoulder. 

“hey gorgeous.” you pull back from him and cup his face in your hands, scanning him over. 

“how’d you even-”

“jesse helped me.” you're still in shock that he’s in front of you right now. he chuckles and leans forward, pressing a kiss to your nose. 

“i’ve missed you,” he whispers and this makes you smile. 

“you have no idea how much i’ve missed you.” you completely forgot that there were other people around you… like your costars who, other than patrick and jesse, had no idea you were seeing someone. 

“y/n, who’s your boyfriend?” 

“guys, this is quinn. quinn, these are my pains in the ass costars.” he gives them all a wave and they all say their hellos. 

“how long have you two been together?” 

“six months” they all gasp  

“and here i was, thinking you’re like, celibate or some shit.” you all laugh and quinn laughs as well. marina then gasps

“you’re the hockey player y/n wouldn't shut up about!” oh no. quinn looks at you, an amused look on his face as you bury your head in his chest. 

“quinn… quinn hughes!” 

“that’s me.” everyone pieces everything together. “you said she wouldn’t shut up about me?” quinn questions, laughing, and you start to drag him to your traile, grabbing your strawberries as well. 

“it was nice meeting you guys,” he waves at them. quinn takes a seat in the chair you had, pulling you to sit in his lap. you rest your head on his shoulder. 

“i still can’t believe you’re here.” 

“well you better believe it because i’m yours for the rest of the week.”

“but hockey?”

“it’s my bye-week. mom said as long as we facetime her once a day so she can talk to you, she won’t be mad at me for not coming to michigan to spend the week with her and dad.” you laugh and pop a strawberry in your mouth. 

“you want one?” you ask him, mouth full. he nods grabs one, putting it in his mouth, humming in satisfaction at the taste. 

“what did they put in those strawberries? they taste better than usual.” 

“they’re always this good. i don’t know what they do to them. but they better keep it coming.” 

when in chicago, you may just meet the one. or your favorite hockey player. 

tags: @goldenbrokenheart @woodruff-edwards @marsthehockeywhore @samosmackie @hughesx3 @jayda12 @theywantedplayer @austinbutlerscaresme @jackhues @jackhughesily @babydollmarauders @equallyshaw @astars-things @akengii

a/n: this was so long, i got carried away. anyways, tumblr messed up so half of this is pasted from google docs so if something pasted twice or the formatting is messed up, i apologize.

[jongseongsnudes]

four.

warning; 😳??? 0.9k words.

masterlist.

“it was a pleasure meeting you here tonight, mr park jongseong,” an older gentleman says as he shakes your boss’ hands a little too eagerly, “i hope we can keep in contact after this to discuss more on future projects.”

finally, it was almost time to leave.

as exciting as it was to have dinner on such an exclusive cruise for the first time, you wanted nothing more than to snuggle into your heaven of pillows back at the hotel. not only were you becoming restless but the three glasses of champagne you had earlier was starting to kick in, slowly overtaking your very lightweight ass. 

and finally, after going through practically every guest on this cruise, it was time to leave. you’re not sure how mr park could converse with so many people about the exact same thing over and over but you respected him for it. he was definitely a hard worker for someone with so much money and power.

quickly gathering your things into your clutch, you follow mr park towards the cruise’s exit in complete silence. perhaps it’s the alcohol in you that had you daring enough to gawk over your boss’ physique from behind. it’s a no brainer that he was good looking, smart and rich but it was almost unfair just how perfect he was, everywhere else as well. the view of his broad shoulders and obviously sturdy arms covered by his white button up had you internally screaming, the piece of thin material doing no justice to him at all. but it’s his height that always catches you off guard because after all, the man did tower over you.

swoon.

as much as you wanted to stay staring at mr park’s back, you actually had other things to worry about. your feet, to be specific. you were evidently struggling, the gravel and uneven ground beneath making it a hundred times harder for you to walk in these fifty inch killer high heels you had on. you wanted to curse at this point, annoyed at the fact that you chose to wear them because pain was all you could feel now.

“oh shit-” as if right on cue, you step on what must’ve been a small rock and feel your ankle give out, causing your entire body to fall forwards. your hand instinctively reaches out to clutch onto whatever there was to keep you up... which happened to be your boss. of course. the poor man almost topples over with how harsh you knocked into him but he immediately stables himself and quickly grabs onto you as well.

oh shit indeed.

“are you okay, miss park?”

“ye- yeah i’m fine. i’m so sorry sir,” you attempt to stabilise yourself but with how much your ankle was hurting, you almost fall over again. “maybe not... my ankle hurts a little.”

a frown immediately appears on mr park’s face as he glances down at your feet, annoyed at something you’re not entirely sure about. but you assume it’s because you’re embarrassing him in front of so many prominent figures.

“i can walk! just slowly though...” your words trail off awkwardly as you muster all your strength to stand by yourself but the man’s clutch around you doesn’t loosen at all. “how about you go to the car first and i’ll be right there! OR you can go back to the hotel first and i’ll take a taxi- AH MR PARK-”

your boss doesn’t even wait for you to finish your sentence before swiftly lifting you (bridal style) into his arms with such ease. how he could look so relaxed and be so unbothered by everyone’s stares really amazed you because you know for a fact that you must’ve looked like a burning tomato sitting in his embrace.

“sir- sir put me down! i can walk, i really can!” you whisper-yell, fully intending to keep the conversation between you and him, “people are staring at you...”

“i don’t want to keep repeating myself, miss park, but am i your boss-”

“i know you’re my boss sir, that’s why you should put me down,” your attempts to convince your stubborn boss don’t seem to phase him at all. “oh my god... i’m wrinkling your shirt too. it must be really expensive!”

instead of the threatening glare you were expecting to see from you interrupting him, the man begins to chuckle, leaving you completely lost for words. the last thing you expected your cold boss to do was... well... chuckle. you don’t think you’ve ever even seen him in such a mood before and it was definitely a sight to see.

“sir... are you okay?”

the smile on his face while looking down at you, though very small, was enough to have your heart picking up the pace. this was something you were afraid of since day one on the job... because having a one sided crush on your boss would not only be disastrous for your job itself... but also for your poor heart.  

end.

taglist; @i-dalso @wony6ung @jeonjungkookkk @j4yluvr​ @soobsbby @astra-line​ @drunkanddazedalways @shine-your-light​ ​@02zprotector @yabukkura ​@sonmil @byunhoebaek @artgukkx @nowrosesaredead ​@lhsng @abdiitcryy @hwasatiny @uuvjungwon @dehydratedami @enhasengene @enhacolor @my5colors @kyutiepeachy @miiiwaa @miixsh @vantxx95 @1115phile @outrologist @9900z @axartia @yuakagi @bunhoons @3nh4luvr @duckieanon @manaswi-madhusudan @skylaryoung2002 @lix-freckle3 @uuwonnie @emoworu @kyoyangwon @sunshine-skz @paolennenicole @cherryblushtzy @carateum1 @ahnneyong @hhganyu @duolingofanaccount @hseungi @omgjwon @jays-blue @jaykedpotato @gobighee @jiawji @taekbokki @wonwon-ie @mavlogist @thedemonundernikisbed @rosie-is-everywhere @kuleo26   @ii4enha-jwn @thejjrl @taytaymuse @cococake @sunooslover @inlovewsimjaeyun @muffinminnie @sashamifasolla @yoonjin96 @choibeomgogi @flower-lise @princesjy @she-is-dreaming ​​@n-wjns @simksl @love-enhaa  

2022 © jongseongsnudes. please do not copy, translate or repost.

[thot-of-khonshu]

Meet cute with Agent Whiskey? ☺️😇

Okay, so at first I didn’t think Agent Whiskey was my thing, knowing sooo many dudes from the south with his cocky attitude (but without his good looks) but god damn like every other P character he got to me. So here I present it…and I’m sorry that of course it got slutty.

Content: meet cute, airplane rides, fingering, dirty talk, jack daniels being the menace that he is

Rating: Explicit 18+

You could not believe your luck. 90% of the time you were on the flight from hell whether it be delayed, stuck in a sweltering cabin waiting for takeoff or sandwiched between new parents and a screaming baby.

On this flight you managed to have your seat upgraded from coach to first fucking class! Hello, champagne. Hello, extended seating. Hello luxury.

You were technically on the aisle seat but you figured why not test your luck again? If the person who was actually sitting there caught you in the window seat, you could feign confusion.

Like clockwork, a broad man in a white shirt, leather jacket and cowboy hat sat next to you. He didn’t have any carry on luggage except for the hat, his tinted glasses and an exceptionally bushy mustache. You looked towards him, ready to apologize but all he did was give you a wink.

“Quite a view, ain’t it?” He finally said after the plane had taken off. He had a deep voice with a slow southern drawl that took you out of your trance, watching the clouds go by.

“Yeah, there’s nothing like it.” You politely smiled back at him.

“I remember my first flight, too. I couldn’t stop staring at them clouds and trying to fix up stories about the shapes.”

“This isn’t my first flight.” You said curtly to him.

“Well, if it isn’t, then why’d you take my seat?” He grinned, giving you a side smirk exposing a dimple. You weren’t in a laughing mood.

“I’m only teasing, sugar. I’ll tell you what, you can keep the seat as long as I get to know your name.”

“I don’t talk to strangers.” You shortly replied.

He leaned over to you, tipping his sunglasses and exposing his dark brown eyes. He gave you a side smirk that made your insides more excited than you wanted to admit and he extended his hand.

“The name’s Jack Daniels, sweetheart.” He looks at your hand expectantly. After a few moments you decide to give in. What the hell, right? You introduce yourself. You shake his large, calloused hand and observe how tiny yours is in his, you see him looking down as if he sees the exact same thing.

“Well, we aren’t strangers anymore, are we? Can I buy you a drink, little girl?"

Who were you to say no to a free drink?

--------------------

After a couple of hours and a couple of drinks in the air, the conversation was fun and definitely flirty. You put your hand on his shoulder whenever he joked he was too old to be talking to you. You'd make a sly remark, and he'd squeeze his hand on your knee, after the third time he ignored all subtlety and stopped moving it all together.

His broad hand engulfed your knee as he grazed his fingers up and down your leg. Somehow in the discomfort of an airplane cabin you kept your legs crossed to form some sort of decency, but to also ignore the pool of want that was forming whenever he slipped his hands higher and higher.

At some point you'd decided you were cold and ordered a blanket. You covered yourself up as Jack grabbed some to share.

"If you want your own, it's $20 bucks. I don't share with strangers." You joked, leaning into him with your wine stained breath.

"I thought we weren't strangers anymore, sweet girl." Jack's side dimple exposed itself. You looked into his eyes, sunglasses off and the liquor you could smell and almost taste in your mouth.

"Hmmm, you don't know. I could be someone who cons old men into buying her drinks on every flight she takes. And just like every other sucker, you took the bait." You whispered.

"Darlin', I'm no sucker. I could tease and please better than you can imagine."

You chuckle at his forwardness. This man had some nerve, and it was somehow working. "Prove it."

He moves towards your ear and whispers in a deep, raspy voice. "Open your legs for me, sweetheart."

As if they had a mind of their own, your legs parted, Jack's fingers squeezing at your leg.

He moved his hand higher and higher until it met the cotton of your underwear. You briefly looked around to see if anyone was paying attention, but there were conversations, naps and movies being watched. Your world only revolved around you and Jack at that moment and with his molten stare, he knew it.

"If we're strangers...Have you ever been finger fucked on an airplane by a stranger, sweet girl?" Jack whispered into your ear. You felt yourself squirm and open yourself up for him.

He pushed your underwear to the side, no doubt already feeling your wetness for him. He moved up and down your folds, stopping at your clit to add a light pressure. You leaned into him to moan into his ear.

"I'm gonna take that as a no. But I tell you what, if this stranger makes you cum? You have to give me your number and let me see you again, wherever the hell it is we're landing."

"I don't have to give you anything." You retort, trying hard not to rock your hips into his pressure.

"That's right, I reckon you don't." Jack nodded. He slid his thick fingers down towards your opening, sliding in with such ease due to how achingly wet you were for him. "But I think once I'm done with you, you're gonna be begging to see me again. I'm already thinking about the next time when I'll get to taste this sweet pussy. Wouldn't you like that?"

You felt so much pressure from his fingers, shallowly entering you. The fight to ride his fingers was a losing game. You knew by the end of the flight, you'd be moaning into his ear, leaking juices all over his fingers spread inside of you and putting your number into his phone so you could do it all again.

[neon-lights-and-glitter]

Fight The Feeling- 1 You Don't Have To Agree

Summary- You and Jack's managers both decide you need to get into a relationship to help your careers. Thinking that you will like each other and not knowing that you had dated in the past, they pair you two up together. You find out some news that might ruin the whole plan.

Word count 3.2k

A/N- this was originally an original character fic, but I changed it and edited it in like 20 minutes, so if there’s any mistakes that’s why.

“Look, you don’t have to agree to it, but just consider it, you being in a relationship will help your career, I promise.” Claire told you, you crossed your arms over your chest as you sighed.

“But who am I going to date? It’s not like I have guys lining up to date me, plus I’m not really interested in being in a relationship right now.” You told Claire. 

“Please, you’re one of the biggest models right now, any guy would be lucky to date you. Plus even if you weren’t, you’re still you, any guy would jump at the opportunity to date you. I’m not even saying that as your manager, I’m saying that as your friend. Plus, it doesn’t have to be a real relationship, celebrities’ fake relationships for publicity all the time.”

You thought about it for a few minutes, you hadn’t entertained the thought of another relationship since you broke up with Jack 2 months ago. You and Jack kept your relationship extremely private, only your closest friends and family knew about the two of you. Not even your management teams knew about you two being a couple, you didn’t want to risk your relationship with Jack being used for publicity. 

You and Jack dated for a little over a year before you broke up. You both loved each other but keeping your relationship private along with both of your careers completely taking off was difficult and led you both to feel like you were being unsupportive of each other and deciding it was best to break up so you could focus on your careers and yourselves.

“Ok, fine.” You agreed, the idea of faking a relationship sounded sort of fun, the perks of being in a relationship without the feelings involved.

“I have the perfect guy in mind, I think the two of you will have amazing chemistry together. The hardest part will be not falling in love with him for real.” Claire teased, causing you to roll your eyes.

“I told you, I’m still getting over a breakup, I’m not interested in a relationship. I won’t be falling for anyone. Who do you have in mind?” You asked.

“You still haven’t told me who you were dating, I want to know.” 

“I’ll tell you one day, I promise. Not right now.” You promised Claire who nodded.

“Well, then I’m keeping who I have in mind a secret, you’ll like him I promise.”

Little did you know, Jack was having almost the same exact conversation with his management team. 

“I don’t get it, you’re always saying how me being single is better for my career. Why is that changing now?” Jack asked Neelam who sighed.

“Well, in a way, it is better for you to remain single, but as tour slows down it will help by keeping your name in the media and being talked about. It will also help people start to take you more seriously. It will also help your image so you won’t be seen as some rapper who sleeps around with whoever, whenever he wants to. It’s difficult to explain but I promise it makes sense, just think about it.” She explained, making Jack think for a moment as he sat back in his chair.

“Ok, fine, whatever, I’ll do it. Who is the girl going to be?” Jack asked.

“I’m still figuring it out, I have a couple girls in mind, but the less information that’s talked about, even between us, the better. I just don’t want someone to overhear us when they walk by. Anyone who knows, will have to sign a very strict non-disclosure agreement. Even then, we have to be careful who we tell. Non-disclosure agreements don’t stop anyone from talking, it just lets us take action if they do.” Neelam said and Jack nodded.

It was only a few days later when your separate teams had planned on the two meeting. You had gotten some news earlier in the day that might throw off the whole plan.

“I need to tell you something.” You told Claire as Claire led you down the hallway to where you were going to meet your “boyfriend”.

“Can it wait? We were supposed to be in this meeting 10 minutes ago, but you were running late.” Claire said, continuing to walk down the hallway.

“Not really, it’s important. Like, really important, might ruin this whole thing level important.” You emphasized and Claire sighed.

“You can tell me after, we already signed all the agreements, everything will be fine, nothing will ruin this.” 

“It won’t take long, just a minute or two. I’m serious, it’s fucking important.” You promised.

“After.” Claire insisted and you rolled your eyes, knowing you weren’t going to win this one.

Less than a minute later and you approached the door. Claire stopping in front of it before either of you could enter, turning to you. 

“Okay, I know you want to talk about whatever it is your freaking out about, but I’m sure it’s going to be okay, and we’ll deal with it after this. Just focus on this for right now and calm yourself down.”

“Maybe I’d fucking calm down if you let me tell you why I’m freaking out and why I was late.” You argued, and Claire glared at you.

“I don’t care why you were late, you can’t change it now. Let’s go, they’ve already been waiting for 15 minutes.” Claire said, giving you a couple seconds to try and calm down before she opened the door, and took a couple steps inside the room. 

“Y/N, this is Jack Harlow, sorry we’re late.”  Claire apologized to his team. As soon as you took a step into the room, you made eye contact with Jack who didn’t know what to do or say either. You instantly felt nauseous, well, more nauseous than you did before. You weren't sure if it was caused by seeing your ex-boyfriend for the first time in 2 months after actively avoiding him or your morning sickness that had started in the last 2 weeks, but your best guess would be a combination of both. 

“I-I’m sorry I’ll be right back.” You said before turning around to walk out of the room and find the nearest bathroom. Out of instinct Jack wanted to follow you to make sure you were okay, but he stopped himself.

“I’m sorry, I promise she usually isn’t late, and now this.” Claire instantly apologized to Jack and his manager. Jack interrupted before he could talk.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to apologize. Is she okay?” Jack asked and Claire nodded.

“Yeah, she just hasn’t been feeling well recently, I’ll be right back, I’m going to go check on her.” Claire said before standing up and walking out of the room to find where you went. 

“So, funny story actually.” Jack turned to Neelam hesitantly.

“What now Jack?” She asked.

“You remember how I told you about that girl I dated but I didn’t tell you about her until we broke up and you kept asking why I was upset?” Jack asked, and Neelam nodded.

“Yeah, what does that have to do with anything?” She asked, and Jack made a motion with his hands to tell her to think about it more. It took her a minute, but she finally put the pieces together. “Was that girl Y/N?” She asked for clarification, and Jack nodded.

“Yeah, it was. We dated for a little over a year.” Jack sighed, running his hands through his hair.

“You didn’t think that might be something you should have mentioned to me before you agreed to this?” She scolded.

“Oh yeah, because I thought the one person I had a relationship with was going to be the one person you would pair me up with. Do I really have to go through with this?” Jack asked.

“You both already signed the paperwork, so yes. Was it a mutual break up at least?” Jack shrugged.

“Kind of? Not really. I don’t know. It’s a complicated situation.” Jack explained.

It only took Claire a few minutes to check one of the bathrooms, finding one of the stall doors closed, assuming it was you.

“It’s me, are you okay?” Claire asked through the door. 

“Not really but I guess so.” You sighed, walking out of the stall and over to the counter, placing your hands down and leaning onto it. Looking at yourself in the mirror for a moment.

“I can’t do this. Not with him.” You told Claire, looking at her through the mirror.

“Why not? I thought you guys would get along?” Claire asked and you laughed sarcastically.

“Yeah, we did. Except now he’s my ex-boyfriend. I fucking loved him.” You confessed.

“Wait, you dated Jack? He was the one you were dating?” Claire asked and you nodded.

“Yeah, he was, and to make things worse, I’m pregnant. With his child.” 

“You’re pregnant? When were you going to tell me?” Claire asked causing you to roll your eyes.

“Yes, I’m pregnant. I just found out this morning. That’s why I was late, and I wanted to before this meeting, that’s what I wanted to tell you, but you thought it could wait.” You said. “I seriously can’t do this. Is it too late to back out?”

“Yes, all the paperwork has been signed and filed. Appearances have already been scheduled, it would be too suspicious to back out now. The only people who know this is fake is the people in that room.” Claire told you. You sighed, running your hands through you hair before putting them down on the counter again.

“I’m never letting you surprise me again.” You told her. Claire opened her mouth to defend herself before stopping herself.

“You know, I was going to defend myself, but I think If I was in your situation, I’d say the same thing.” Claire agreed. “Does Jack know?” She asked, and you shook your head.

“Not yet, you’re the first person I told, I’ll tell him, just don’t say anything okay?” Claire nodded.

“I won’t. Let’s go back in.” You sighed but nodded, following Claire back into the meeting room. 

This time you made sure not to look at Jack this time, sitting down across from Jack and next to Claire. As Claire and Neelam talked about the arrangement, you couldn’t help but look at Jack occasionally. Jack on the other hand, couldn’t keep his eyes off you. You hadn’t seen each other for 2 months since the night you broke up. 

“Are you okay?” Jack mouthed to you one of the times you looked at him. You nodded quickly before looking down at your hands for a moment. 

“Okay, so we have the articles ready to go once they get the okay right?” Neelam asked Claire who nodded.

“Yeah, they are just waiting for the okay from their sources, us, and they will post them. I can give them the okay tomorrow morning.” Claire told her. “Then we have the paparazzi photos, a couple days later, we can tip them off on a location once we have a specific time.”

“And then after that we’ll get them on one couple’s interview, probably the couples quiz? After they confirm their relationship status.” Neelam said and Claire nodded.

“Then after that, we quiet things down, maybe an appearance or two, a social media post maybe. We don’t want to overexpose them as a couple to quickly.” Claire said and Neelam nodded in agreement. 

Neither you or Jack were paying attention to the conversation, Jack to focused on you and you were focused on your thoughts. How was Jack going to take the news you were pregnant? Why was Jack suddenly faking a relationship when 2 months ago he was telling you he couldn’t go public with you. You had so many questions. Some that you knew the answer to but just didn’t want to admit. Claire and Neelam continued to plan out some events for the couple before eventually deciding they had done enough, plus Jack had to leave so he wasn’t late for his next meeting.

“Does that sound good to you two?” Claire asked you and Jack, who turned their heads to her, Jack nodding in agreement even though he had no idea what he was agreeing too.

“Yeah.” You agreed as well, not wanting to admit you weren’t paying attention. 

“Ok, good, I’ll get the articles out tomorrow morning, and then you two have 2 days to figure out what’s going on between you two. I know it isn’t an ideal situation, but I don’t care how much you interact, or how unless we are in public okay?” Neelam said.

“Okay.” Jack agreed.

“Jack?” You fully acknowledged Jack for the first time other then your nod earlier and some glances here and there.

“Yeah?” Jack turned to you.

“Can we talk?” You asked Jack, playing with one of the rings on your finger.

“Can we talk later?” Jack asked and you nodded slightly.

“Yeah, I guess that’s fine.” In a way, you preferred that, it gave you time to think about what you wanted to say and how you wanted to tell Jack you were pregnant, but you also wanted to get it over with.

“Unblock my number and I’ll text you later, I only have one more meeting and then I’m done for the day.” Jack told you and you rolled your eyes at his first comment.

“I will.” You said as Neelam interrupted the two. 

“We have to leave Jack.” She told him and Jack nodded, following Neelam out of the room. Claire put her attention back on you, waiting a minute after the door closed before speaking.

“Are you going to tell him tonight?” Claire asked, you didn’t look up from your hands.

“I guess so. Might as well just get it over with.” 

“How do you think he’ll react?” You sighed, pulling your legs up on the chair. 

“I don’t know. I mean, I know it’s not the best situation, but he’s also half responsible.” You shrugged, leaning back on your chair.

“Why did you break up?” Claire asked.

“I think we tried to keep things to private. It was fun at first, having that level of privacy and sneaking around, but then we had to plan everything out too much and we couldn’t do things that normal couples could do. Neither of us felt like we could support each other, I couldn’t go to his shows, or visit him on tour. He couldn’t come to fashion week like he wanted to or anything like that. I was willing to try going public with our relationship, but he didn’t want to, so we broke up and decided to just focus on ourselves.”’ You explained and Claire nodded.

“How did you guys meet?”

“Some random industry party. We just connected for some reason, and we were staying at the same hotel, and ended up running into each other in the elevator on the way back. I ended up going to his room and we stayed up all night talking.” You said, playing with your ring still.

“Do you want to use that as the story to how you met? Instead of making something up.” Claire asked and you shrugged.

“Might as well, makes it easier to remember.” You agreed.

A couple hours later you had made your way home, at some point during the day you had unblocked Jack’s number. Every time you heard your phone go off, you checked it instantly, part of you wanting it to be Jack, and another part of you hoping it wasn’t. 

Finally, a call from Jack came through, you waited a couple rings to answer it, not wanting to seem like you were eager for his call.

“Hello?” You answered.

“Hey, sorry it took so long to call, I just got done with my meetings. Do you want me to come over to your place or we could meet somewhere if you want.” Jack suggested.

“You can come over.” You told Jack. “We should talk in private anyways.” Jack nodded even though you couldn’t see him.

“Okay, I’m 5 minutes away.” Jack said and they said goodbye before hanging up. The whole time you were waiting on Jack you couldn’t sit still. Even though your apartment was already spotless, you couldn’t help but clean up more just for something to do. As soon as you heard a knock on the door, you sighed, you couldn’t get out of this now. You walked to the door and opened it up.

“Hi.” You smiled softly. “You can come in.” You said, opening the door further for Jack who walked inside.

“Hi.” Jack smiled softly at you. “I just want to make it very clear, I had no idea that Neelam and Claire were going to put us together.” Jack said.

“I believe you Jack because I had no idea either. I don’t think this is a situation that either of us want to be in.” You said, walking into her living room as Jack awkwardly followed behind you.

“I mean, I feel like there is worse people we could be paired with, but you’re right.” Jack agreed as you sat down on the couch, Jack sitting on the other side as you turned to each other. “What did you want to talk about?” Jack asked and you sighed.

“Well, I feel like there’s a lot we have to talk about in general. I know this is just going to complicate the situation even more, but it’s something that you need to know, it’s something you need to know even if we weren’t in the situation we’re in now.” You rambled before Jack interrupted you.

“Your rambling, just tell me what it is.” Jack said, knowing that when you were nervous, you would talk forever before getting out what you wanted to say.

“Sorry.” You said quietly, looking down and playing with your ring just like you had done earlier in the day.

“It’s okay, don’t apologize.” Jack said.

“I don’t know how else to say this, but I’m pregnant.” You told Jack, not looking up at him.

“You’re pregnant?” Jack asked, wanting to confirm he heard you correctly. You nodded.

“Yeah, I found out this morning. I know it’s not ideal, but none of this is.” You sighed as Jack ran his hands through his hair.

Jack didn’t feel like he was ready for a baby. You weren’t together, it wasn’t how he pictured starting a family. Jack still cared for you, and there was even a part of Jack that still loved you, but he no longer felt that he was in love with you. You had a strained relationship, how were you supposed to raise a baby together when you were both as busy as you had ever been, the whole reason you broke up was to focus on your careers, and because Jack had cheated, but Jack didn’t know that you knew that. 

“Is it.” Jack hesitated, knowing that you weren’t going to take the next thing he said well, and he couldn’t really blame you, he just didn’t know how else to ask it. “Is the baby mine?” Jack asked. 

[eightsevenths]

eddie loves the sun.

pairing, steve harrington x eddie munson

length, 3.7k

warnings, first kiss, mutual idiot pining, jealousy, happy ending

read now (under the cut) or on ao3

Eddie wasn’t sure he was in love with Steve. I mean, yeah, he had had the question rolling around in his padded cell of a brain for a couple of months, but nothing was set in stone. 

It’s just that like, see, Steve? He’s everything. Like not just Eddie’s everything, although he is, but it’s just like not that big of a deal because it’s become a fact; his life revolves around Steve. And he hadn’t considered that ever being a problem, until now.

Now, or the moment of Eddie’s masochistic nightmares, had Eddie burning holes through the back of some dark-haired anonymous threat who had all of Steve’s attention. Attention which up until earlier tonight, Eddie had sort of bet would be his to roll around in. 

Just as everyone was piling into Steve’s dark red beauty, he catches Eddie’s arm. His grip tightens on the leather and Eddie looks at him, Steve’s got a look like spun sugar in his eyes, the multiple clear shots that had slid down a little too easily probably the cause, and he licks his lips- that are... glittery? Is he wearing lipgloss? Eddie doesn’t have time to unpack the gut blow that is that sight- 

“I’ve been thinking,” Eddie smiles at the sound of his voice, “maybe it’s time for me to get out there again.” 

He’s not proud of the way his face falls. 

“Uh,” he clears his throat and looks around, anywhere but Steve’s stupid brown eyes, “You mean like, uh, dating? Or just,” he can’t get the words out like they physically won’t exit his body which is like the exact opposite of his usual problem. 

Steve seems to understand the trailing off and nods, even adding a little tilt to his head like a fucking gunshot to Eddie’s chest, “Yeah like it’s been a while and, I-I don’t know maybe it’s the next logical step?” His buttery soft voice phrased everything like a question, forcing false hope down eddies throat, which has led to him trying to flush it out with bleach all night. 

Logical step. Logical step. Logical step. 

It is the drum beat thudding in his heart, the headache hammering the coffin nails over his heart, the feeling of the bass coming from where Steve is dancing near the speakers with a body that is not his (Note: the guy is wearing LOAFERS in a fucking bar for god sake.), it is the thing that will no doubt keep him up every night until something changes, until he isn’t a coward and doesn’t keep every feeling deeper than content to himself.

Maybe he should say something. To someone at least. He doesn’t like his chances of getting Steve off the dance floor right now.

So, he settles for Steve's un-biological twin.

“Hey Buckley,” he kind of has to shout over the speakers but she turns from Nancy to face him. They’re all sat in a worn leather booth and with Robin’s attention on him, he has also gained Nancy’s. “and, Wheeler, of course,” he winks, “uh- what do you guys think when you hear the term uh, ‘logical step?”

He should’ve expected confused faces meeting that very obviously something topic of conversation.

Nancy settles back into her seat, regarding Eddie with one of her very scrutinising gazes. 

“So, what did Steve say? ‘Logical step’? I need the context to give you any advice,”

“I actually wasn’t asking for advice-“ I mean he was never going to be able to make Nancy see that but he did need to clarify he was not looking for advice, he was perfectly fine figuring things out, 

“Well, you need it.”

“Clearly.” Buckley finished eloquently. And Nancy is smiling like the winner of an argument Eddie didn’t realise he was a part of. 

And shit. Maybe they’re right. 

After a minute of Eddie staring off into the distance and hoping some magical mystical force would help him the fuck out, he relents and turns back to them. 

“Okayyyy. I want to ask you a question first. Then I’ll explain, deal?”

Robin shakes his hand, Nancy nods like a mob boss and Eddie once again is left thinking she could totally kill him and get away with it. She’s cool. (Read: Nancy is only scary until she is looking at Robin with ooey gooey eyes and she’s like a happy kitten.)

“When regarding me and Steve and our friendship,” Robin cuts him off with a scoff, he levels her with a look before carrying on, “What do you think is the next ‘logical step’?”

Buckley’s looking right through him, probably telepathically communicating with Steve. Eddie looks over at Steve and he’s still where he was, eyes closed hands up dancing like he is completely unaware of anything around him, it simultaneously stresses Eddie out beyond comprehension and also makes him so turned on that he thinks his heart might stop. So much for a nice night out. 

Nancy watches his ringed fingers pick at the label on his beer, “I think, from an outsider, you and Steve have always had something.” He makes the mistake of looking up at her, her gaze steady on him when she speaks, “To me, the next logical step would be for something to happen between you: if it hasn’t already.”

His hair hits his face when he shakes his head, “No, no, no, nothing, nothing’s ever happened.” When he laughs it sounds hollow and empty and he needs to swallow down Nancy’s words. 

She’s right, right? Like when has Nancy ever been wrong, first of all, and it just confirms what he’s already thinking, what he’s been thinking.

They must read this on his face, so Robin asks, “So what is the context of this conversation? Because it seems to me like you’re agreeing with Nance and you’re still not good?” 

So he begins, reminds them of the start of the night and how after they had all finished getting ready for the bar Steve had stopped him outside the car, “And then he said that he thinks it’s the next ‘logical step’ and I've been wracking my fuckin’ brain trying to figure out what the hell that means, for me, I mean like what does that do to us?”

“He said this and just left it?”

He nods. 

The brunette grins, the blonde sighs, 

“W-What does this mean? Wha- is it good? Is it bad? Wh-“

“Eddie, breathe, dude.”

Good point. 

His chest inhales and they wait to talk more until after he exhales and calms down a bit. 

“Listen, I don’ know if he wants me to say anything and usually I wouldn’t but sometimes Steve has a habit of getting rid of anything good for himself before it happens and occasionally, I have no choice but to intervene.” Robin takes a sip of her beer before continuing, “Having said that and designating this one of those moments, yeah: he’s totally gone for you. Honestly, I’d bet this is a game to him, probs tryna get your attention.” Then she leans over and sips from Nancy’s drink.

Whilst Eddie’s brain implodes on itself and causes mass destruction, millions dead kinda thing, Robin returns the bottle back to her lips and looks away like the conversation is over, which causes Nancy to start giggling to herself.  

“I think what Robin said was totally right and obvious, but to help you out because sometimes you guys need it spelt out for you: make yourself the logical step.”

“Is it that easy?”

“It can be.”

/

The music in this place was crappy. But Eddie knew that if he said that aloud it would prompt Steve's indignant argument of ‘you’re such a music snob oh my god-‘, which was always paired with him doing an Eddie impression which was as hot as it was adorable. The only reason he was even aware of the music all of a sudden was because he was walking through the dance floor, walking was generous he was kind of pushing and sometimes dodging melting pairs of bodies. 

If he focused, he would probably be able to tell his shoes were sticking to the covered-in-Something floor and the actual amount of humans in such a small place, but Eddie found if he could find something worth all of his focus and attention it was actually harder to be distracted. It should’ve been a sign when all of his old hyper fixations weren’t as bright anymore and how his head kept unconsciously turning to the sunbeam sat in the corner.

Sunbeam was now suddenly in his eye line, and he feels like he’s just done a marathon and seen the finish line, like he finally found the destination it had taken three hours to search the woods for, and it was completely worth it. 

As much as he would’ve lacerated the guy with a switchblade an hour ago, the brunette Steve is talking to (still) isn’t as much of a threat anymore. Don’t get him wrong he’s still imagining sixteen different ways to puncture a lung that’s quick enough for him to run from, but after his intervention with the girls, he knows that what him and Steve have is something and it is not all in his head anymore, holy-fucking thank you, god. 

At this point, the pair are stood facing each other at the bar and Steve has his back to Eddie so he doesn’t see him approaching. His feet carry him closer until he’s finally behind Steve. He knows how jumpy Steve can get, in loud places and his ears are never that great anyway so Eddie lets his arms curve up Steve’s back as he comes into view.

Steve doesn’t even flinch, which shocks Eddie. The younger man can see the question already forming behind Eddie’s eyes, so he leans up towards Eddie’s ear, “Felt your rings.” 

His voice is raspy, and Eddie has to focus his eyes because Steve’s voice just does things to him, especially if he’s going to act like this. Fuckin’ tantalising little kitten fuck. 

His hands fall to Steve’s waist and he almost freezes when Steve leans into him. He takes a second to breathe and refocus, remembering what he came here for, and yet so painfully aware of how desperately he needs this to go right. Knowing how important it is he plays his cards right. 

He knows Steve.

“So, who’s your friend?” Eddie smiles sharply at the guy now assessing this new person interrupting, he bites back a pleased look when the guy looks intimidated. It shouldn’t be this easy for him to get jealous over someone an hour ago he thought he would just be friends with for the rest of his life. Eddie is fucking blind, clearly.

Steve is looking up at him like he wants to fucking devour Eddie, how drunk is he? Eddies eyes look over to the beer, Steve’s second one which he only knows because he’s been watching him like a hawk, and its half full. So not drunk at all. Oh?

He licks his lips and replies, stretching a hand out towards mystery man, “Oh this is Adam, he is uh into, uh- Engineering?” Steve’s head tilts, clearly looking for help at the guy, whose eyes are wide as saucers at this point.

“Economics.”

“Oh, Economics, of course, I'm so sorry!” Steve is a terrible actor. Eddie loves Steve. 

The three of them all know the conversation, if there even was any, is over now. Eddie gives them an out, asking if he can speak to Steve privately and, considering if he asked Steve couldn’t probably tell him the guy's name, he comes easy. 

Robin keeps her head down as they pass and Nancy shoots Eddie a wink as he leads Steve out the back door with a hand on the small of his back. A warm pressure, grounding and promising. 

A warm evening greets them on their way out, they settle against a wall, still close. Eddie’s mind is racing, when is it not, and every second he is reminded that he thinks Steve is the most beautiful person he’s ever seen. Gazing at his side profile, his strong jaw and full lips which have remnants of glitter, the freckles and moles on every slip of visible golden skin, eyelashes that flutter over to Eddie giving him a look he feels is similar if not more knowing. 

“So, you wanted to talk more privately with me?” pink lips stretch into an easy grin and Eddie throws his head back, partly exasperated and partly completely into it. Eddie loves Steve.

He looks back down to the angel. “Yeah, just wanted to catch up, how you been?” his voice deepens without his consciousness, playing into the joke.

His partner almost looks shocked but falls right into his role. “Oh, how nice of you to check in!” he steps closer, tipping his chin up at Eddie, “Well I’ve been feeling a little lonely actually.” Full-on pouting and pretending Eddie’s dick isn’t rock hard at this point. 

One thing he never predicted was to have the upper hand, sexually, on Steve Harrington. And he probably doesn’t but, Eddie knows what he wants. Has memorised how he looks with pleading eyes just to get what he wants and how he practically melts if he’s cuddled the right way or how his headspace changes if he’s held anywhere on his neck. This all melds into, Eddie knows how Steve thinks he wants this to play out and he knows how he actually wants it to.

“Oh yeah? That’s interesting,” Eddie slowly backs Steve against the wall adjacent, “because I’ve been feeling pretty abandoned all night,” Steve looks like he's about to argue, so Eddie puts a ringed, tattooed finger up to his lips pushing ever so slightly, “and I came here thinking I was gonna spend some time with you, maybe just buy you a drink. You see how that makes me feel? Did you think about how I would feel when you were talking to some fuck-head wearing loafers in a bar.”

That elicits a giggle from Steve and it vibrates on Eddie’s finger before he pulls it away, he relaxes into the wall and lets Eddie cage him in. Eddie loves Steve. 

“Or was it all part of your plan? Tryna get me jealous, Stevie?” he looks down at Steve’s lips, they part as he speaks.

“And if I was?” 

Their bodies move towards each other, magnetic forces pulling them into one and everything is Steve. Eddie can smell his shampoo, his cologne and the beer, can feel his strong arms beside him and the heat radiating off him like he’s actually familiar with the sun. 

He is irresistible and a temptation from sinful gods and Eddie would make wings out of wax to get too close and burn and fall a million times over. Eddie loves Steve. Eddie is in love with Steve.

“Well then I’d say it worked, but only because I was already in love with you, Steve.”

Steve’s whole face drops and there's a flash of an angry look before strong hands are on Eddie’s face yanking him down into Steve’s. There's a split second of confusion that immediately dissolves into a Greek chorus of ‘yes yes yes’ in Eddie’s mind. 

The kiss is undeniably hot, Steve is moving his tongue in ways he should be worshipped for and mewling like a goddamn kitten every time Eddie nips at his lips. Opening up so pretty for Eddie to explore, taste and Eddie is lost in him. 

He meets the hand winding in his hair with a groan into the younger man’s mouth, another hand pressing nails into his back. It’s wet and noisy and fucking delicious, he can’t ever imagine stopping or having enough. 

One of his own ringer hands finds it threading between silky brown tendrils and Eddie has been dying to do this from the moment he got close with Steve; he brings his hand from the nape of Steve’s neck and grabs a handful and just pulls.

Steve’s mouth pulls away from his, spit glistening on both of their panting mouths, letting out a filthy moan which Eddie licks from his mouth. His neck bared, allowing his head to be moved however Eddie decides. Heavy lidded gaze and Steve just waits. Silent and panting and keeping eye contact, breath quickening when Eddie begins to speak. 

“We need to leave now, yeah?” 

It’s not Eddie in control when Steve nods his head roughly. 

Eddie is in love with Steve.

Steve is in love with Eddie.

Eddie is going to ruin Steve.

- notes, thanks for reading hope you enjoyed!

[whumpywinterbun]

i need you closer. 1/2

A mission went wrong, Sam is hurt, Bucky is blaming himself and spiraling. Pretty badly. Good thing his neighbor (friend) cares about him.

Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader (something something somewhat around tfatws?)

Part 2

(emotional) hurt/comfort, a little whumpy, mutual pining (idiots in love)

Warnings: panic attacks, hallucinations, self harm (without the actual intent to self harm? Bucky scratches himself bloody while hallucinating), medication

a/n: This is a part one, i’ll post the second part tomorrow or the day after. It’s a little (very) whumpy again hah also english isn’t my native language so uh feel free to tell me if i messed something up.

Bucky had enough of this week. Frankly, every week for the past months but this week was a different kind of bad. He went on a mission with Sam for a bit, which always took a toll on him, but it went sideways, he messed up, they were given wrong intel, Sam got hurt and now he’s back home waiting for Sam to get better and new information on the mission. Bucky spend the past few days visiting Sam in hospital, seeing his therapist and sitting at home, wishing he would have been the one to get hit. In that exact order. Sleep? Something he hadn’t had in days. Bucky talked to his therapist about feeling like it’s been his fault that everything went to shit, but he only got half-assed comments about “not beating himself up” and “not being able to change it now.”

The only good thing was coming back to you. His neighbor. And friend. At least he liked to think of you as a friend. Bucky liked spending time with you, talking to you, going to your favorite cafés and bookshops with you.

You.

He liked you.

And that speaks volumes.

Bucky tried to stop caring about the people around him after Steve left. He always told himself that it would keep him from feeling left alone and lonely ever again. He could be on his own, right? People rarely treated him with kindness ever since he got his own mind back and left Wakanda. Bucky was a monster to some, a murderer to others, a criminal at least and sometimes, he admitted to himself, he wished he would have never gotten out of Hydra. But then came you. Beautiful, kind, cheerful you. And he thanked the entity watching over him, or destiny, or maybe just luck, that an idiot in your apartment complex had caused water damage and you were both looking for a way to escape the mess at three am on the building’s rooftop.

A long conversation, shared cigarettes and exchanged numbers later Bucky was cursing at himself for thinking someone would want to spend time with him.

Several small meet ups, phone calls and neighbor emergencies later, he cursed himself for trusting you enough to keep you in his life.

The worst thing about this week though, was Bucky knowing you were there. Just right next to him and listening to your favorite songs and walking around and watching TV and doing your daily routine that he has heard hundreds and hundreds of times with his enhanced hearing (he swears he's not a creep) , but he couldn’t talk to you. He just couldn’t. You would ask him about the mission, something you weren’t even supposed to know of, but he trusted you too damn much and what was he supposed to say? “Oh, I messed up and now my best friends in hospital, but it’s fine.”?

So, Bucky stayed by himself, ignoring your calls and knocks and hoping you too would soon realize what a massive fuck up he was. He figured that being close to him would get you hurt at some point, so Bucky stayed away for your sake.

What he didn’t know,

or at least didn’t think of,

was that you too could hear him sometimes.

You could hear him opening and closing his apartment door. Sometimes a neighbor would greet him, and you could hear his voice greeting them back. You knew he was there; it was hard not to, and you had long figured that something must be wrong. But you didn’t want to intrude.

Bucky had sometimes mentioned things about his past. Not too much, it made him uncomfortable and you could tell he didn’t want to scare you or something, but just enough to know why you heard him scream at night, why his eyes glazed up, why he tensed up and stared into the distance. So, you let him be, in fear of pushing him away from you. He would come around eventually, you hoped. And so, you kept listening to him opening and closing the door at the same time every day, as some sign of him being okay enough to still be keeping his schedule.

What you didn’t know,

was that Bucky was spiraling.

Pretty badly.

Three Hours. That’s how much sleep Bucky had before he was violently woken up by his dreams again, his throat raw. But he couldn’t escape. He could still smell the blood, the gore, he could still hear the scream. Sam’s scream. Bucky looked around himself and couldn’t recognize where he was, it was all too blurry and dark. He could barely breathe. But what he could see, and feel, was the blood on himself, on his left arm. The blood was stuck between its plates, dulling the black and gold.

Bucky stood up and ran into what looked like a bathroom. His bathroom. Was it his? He couldn’t focus on anything but Sam’s blood clinging onto him. Everything was so blurry. He fell over something, got blood all over the floor. Why was there so much blood? He got into the bathtub and turned the water on but somehow the blood just wasn’t washing off, while the water turned darker and darker. Bucky tried to rub the blood off himself, but nothing helped, nothing could rinse, clean him from the blood he had spilled. He kept rubbing, scratching, anything to get rid of it, but nothing had helped. He looked up, realizing he had painted the walls red. Bucky cried, he screamed. His throat hurt so much but he kept screaming.

And you heard him.

You had heard Bucky scream once already that night, knowing his past was haunting him yet again. But it was when you heard something fall that you put your ear to the wall between your apartments and heard water running for a while. He was probably okay, just trying get rid of the nightmare, you thought, taking a shower seemed like a reasonable thing to do in his position and so you moved away from the wall and were on the way back to your own bed until you heard the screams. His screams.

You rushed out of your apartment, taking the set of keys to Bucky's apartment he had once left for you in case of emergencies. You still knocked on his door, asking if he’s okay through it, just in case. He had stopped screaming at this point, but the water didn’t stop. You couldn’t shake the feeling that something just wasn’t okay, that he needed you. So, you opened the door carefully.

“Bucky, It’s me.”

You had looked around the corridor of his small apartment, slowly nearing the bathroom. You could hear Bucky crying. Quiet, exhausting sobbing. That’s when you entered the bathroom. And there he was. Small, oh god he looked so small and scared, in his bathtub, the water falling on him.

Bucky was still in his underwear, his skin red from the scalding water and his exhausted hands scratching his skin. There were deep scratches all over him, blood seeping through the torn skin. “Oh god…What happened?!” You had sunk down next to the tub, reaching over and turning the water off. “The b-blood. There is so much b-blood. And i-it’s not coming off. It’s everywhere. Go! Please go! You shouldn’t be s-seeing t-this.” You were confused. “What are you talking about?”

“Sam’s blood! It’s everywhere! See!” Bucky held his arms up but there was nothing apart from torn skin that was already slowly mending. You carefully moved your hand up to touch his arm. Bucky winced, his breathing getting shakier. “Hey, it’s okay, you are okay. Come on, breathe with me. In. And out. In. And out.” Bucky had once or twice mentioned that he hallucinated occasionally and you remembered him telling you about medication he had been prescribed to calm him down. Or at least enough to get him out of such intense phases. “I will be right back, is that okay?” Bucky swallowed, before slowly nodding. You smiled softly at him, rushing to the kitchen cabinet you knew he kept his medications in, before finding the pills he had told you about “in case he would totally freak out on you.” You took the right dosage and a glass of water with you back into the bathroom. “Here, take these.” “What's this?” Bucky’s voice was raw and quiet, you had never seen or heard him like this.

“They will help you; you told me to give them to you, remember?” You held your hand with the small, white pills out, trying to smile while you were slowly breaking apart yourself. Bucky reminded you more of a broken child than the strong, tall man you knew. He took the pills, putting them in his mouth before gulping down the glass of water. You sat there in silence with him, little, soft touches to his arm and carefully stroking his head while he slowly came down and started getting drowsy.

“I don’t deserve you…” his head was leaning against the bathtubs edge.

“Bullshit, I care about you.”

“Yeah…that’s the point y/n.”

He looked up, tears in his eyes. “You shouldn’t care about me. Everyone who ever cared about me died, left or gets hurt.” “I’m not planning on dying, leaving or getting hurt anytime soon, so you are stuck with me for a whil- “

“You will.”

You took his hand. “You know that that’s my decision, right? If I get hurt caring about you, that’s on me.”

“Sure…” “I mean it Bucky. I’m being with you right now because I choose to be here. Because I like you. You are my friend. My Bucket. Do you think I could just stop caring?”

“…Thank you.” Bucky rested his head against the tub again, closing his eyes.

“Come on let’s get you out of here, you will catch a cold.” “I can’t get sick y/n.” “Then I will, come on.” You got up, holding your arms towards Bucky to help him get out of the bathtub, before handing him a towel. “Should I get fresh underwear?” “So desperate to rummage through my underwear, doll?” He tried for a crooked little smile. “I will smack you.,” you deadpanned, trying to hide the growing smile on your face. “I don’t think I can stand for long enough without help…” Bucky’s voice dropped again. “I’ll help you walk to your bedroom. Come on.” You hooked your arm in his, leading him out of the bathroom to the bedroom Bucky admittedly rarely used and sat him down on his bed. “Where’s the underwear?” He pointed at a drawer. You threw the boxers at him and awkwardly pointed at the door. “I’ll uh… let you change.” And left the bedroom.

You walked back to Bucky's bathroom, cleaning up a little, putting back all the knocked down bottles and putting some kitchen towels on the wet floor before you could take a deep breath for the first time in what felt like hours.

You adored Bucky. So much. You wish you could somehow show him just how much, but you didn’t want to risk a friendship that meant so much to the both of you for feelings he probably didn’t reciprocate.

“Y/n?” You rushed back.

“You are not naked, are you?” You heard Bucky laugh.

“No.” You opened the door and he was already laying down under the covers, the exhaustion finally taking over.

“Do you need anything Buck? Water, I can make you some tea… I can… stay over on the couch if… you want…” your voice got quieter with every word, not sure if you were overstepping his boundaries.

“No. I mean. Yes. No, I don’t need anything but yes can you…stay over…please? And maybe stay here with me for a bit…” “Of course, Buck.” You went up to the other side of Bucky's bed, sitting down next to him. “Oh man it’s such a comfy bed, you are really wasting it Bucket.” You heard a small chuckle from the blanket burrito next to you. Bucky reached out with his right hand, taking your hand in his. You stayed like this until you were sure he fell asleep, before slowly moving your hand away and carefully getting up. “Please stay.”

“Okay Buck.” You laid down next to him, until his breathing evened out and you too, fell asleep.

[kaiijo]

love triangles in twisted wonderland (ii)

characters: ruggie, kalim, cater, malleus, sebek, jack notes: gn! reader, mix of jpn and eng translations

ruggie bucchi vs kalim al-asim

Ruggie didn’t know how he felt about Kalim. On one hand, he represented everything Ruggie really despised — spoiled, oblivious, lazy upper-crust people who wouldn’t know a struggle if it hit them in the face. On the other hand, Kalim never gave him a real reason to dislike him beyond his socioeconomic standing.

That is, until now.

You and Kalim, much to Ruggie’s dismay, had been paired up for some Astrology project. You two had been friendly before but now, you were attached at the hip. Or, more accurately, Kalim followed you around like a lost pup, which made Ruggie roll his eyes every time he saw it. You didn’t seem to mind though…

It was a rare moment nowadays to have you to himself, so Ruggie capitalized on the fact that you were alone at a cafeteria table and that Leona had been sound asleep in the gardens at that moment. Skipping the line and ignoring disgruntled cries, Ruggie got a hamburger and joined you at your table.

You perked up when you saw him, offering him a smile that made his stomach flip-flop. “Hey!”

“You mind if I sit here?”

“You know that I don’t. I feel like it’s been forever since I’ve seen you!”

“Yeah.” Ruggie resisted the urge to point out that Kalim was the reason for it, instead opting to say, “I’ve been studying my ass off for Vargas’s exam.”

“Me too,” you sighed, resting your cheek on your palm. “Who would’ve thought the Headmage would make him do a written exam?”

Ruggie replied, “I heard something different — that Professor Trein basically said Vargas wouldn’t be able to pull together one since he’s got muscles for brains, or something like that.”

You snorted out a laugh, “Even if that isn’t true, it is in my head.”

Ruggie bit down on his lip to keep from grinning too widely. Your conversation carried on, blissfully uninterrupted, for approximately seven more minutes (not that Ruggie was counting or anything) until the exact person Ruggie didn’t want to say bounded over in his endless sunshine.

“Ooh! Is that the blush sauce pasta?” Kalim asked you, leaning over your shoulder. Ruggie huffed when your attention was pulled from him. “Do you think I’ll like it? Can I have a bite?”

Ruggie glared at Kalim as you twirled up a bunch of pasta, holding it out on your fork for Kalim to try. He wondered if Kalim was purposefully a messy eater or if that was just him, but some sauce splattered on his cheek. “Whoops,” Kalim said and you just shook your head fondly, wiping some off with a napkin.

Deliberate or not, Ruggie had one thought cross his mind: Two can play that game. With that, he braced himself and drove his knee upwards into the table. He let out a yelp of pain and your attention was immediately diverted. “Are you okay, Ruggie?” You shot up from your seat and came over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Roll up your pant leg — is it bruising?”

As you started pulling the fabric up, Ruggie shot a sidelong glance at Kalim, who was watching intently with a pout, and his mouth pulled into a smug smirk.

Ruggie: 1, Kalim: 0.

cater diamond vs. malleus draconia

Since Riddle and the rest of the housewardens were away on some bonding retreat organized by Kalim, Cater decided to throw a party. Half of it was to be able to have fun without Riddle getting on to him about the rules, and the other half was because he wanted an excuse to spend time with you outside of class. You had been pretty busy recently so he was really looking forward to chilling with you.

Imagine his shock when he saw you walk into the dorm with Malleus Draconia at your side. Tall, dark, and regal, Malleus cut an intimidating figure as followed you across the room, headed for Cater. “Hey!” you chirped, grinning brightly. “Thanks for inviting us.” Cater’s heart skipped a beat as he soaked in the sight of your smile.

Malleus nodded along and said, “It was very generous of you.”

Part of Cater wanted to say that he invited you, not Malleus, but he definitely wasn’t going to say that. Plus, maybe he could get a Magicam pic with him at this party? “Of course!” Cater replied, “I’m super excited to have you here!” He turned to Malleus and said, “Not often that I see you out and about!”

You looped you arm through Malleus, something both he and Cater took note of, and said, “This is Malleus’s first big party so I was thinking you could show him around and introduce him with me?”

“I’d be surprised if people didn’t know him,” Cater said. “But I’ll definitely help.”

“Ah,” Malleus spoke up. “We wouldn’t want to impose on Cater. I would be okay if you just showed me around, Y/n.”

Cater’s smile faltered but he recovered, shaking his head. What was that about? “It’s no trouble at all, really.”

“It’s uncourteous of a host to leave his guests unattended and to curry favor on one,” Malleus pressed and Cater’s eyes narrowed. What was Malleus playing at?

It didn’t take long for Cater to put two and two together. The way Malleus didn’t reject your touch, the way he arrived with you, the way he insisted that only you showed him around, the tenderness with which he looked at you — Malleus liked you. Panic bubbled up in him. If that was the case, and you brought him with you to Cater’s party, did that mean you liked Malleus romantically?

At that exact moment, another thought dawned on Cater. “Shouldn’t you be at the housewarden retreat?” He nearly jumped when the aura around Malleus became a mix of gloom and irritation.

You definitely felt the shift too as you asked, “Cater, can I talk to you alone for a sec?” You grabbed his arm and hauled him off somewhere, calling sweetly over your shoulder to Malleus, “We won’t be gone long!”

You led Cater to an empty hallway and said, “Malleus wasn’t invited, so I decided to bring him here to, you know, cheer him up!”

Ah, now that made sense. His body relaxed a little. So this wasn’t a date. You just felt bad that Malleus wasn’t invited.

You continued, “I know you’re hosting and it’s a lot to ask, but could you help me just make sure he has a good time? Or at least isn’t sulking alone in the corner?”

Cater considered this for a second. He wasn’t too keen on babysitting Malleus for the night but if it meant spending time with you… “Sure, no problem!” When your face broke into a relieved smile, Cater knew that, somehow, this would be worth it.

sebek zigvolt vs. jack howl

“Master Lilia!” Sebek shouted, rushing into the Diasomnia dorm. Looking up from a game of chess with Silver, who had fallen asleep across from him, Lilia asked, “What can I do for you, Sebek?”

“I seek counsel!”

“Oh? On what matter?”

Sebek huffed, “I am trying to find a way to spend more time with Y/n but I am at a loss for how to do so. Every time I approach them, they are with someone and even when they are not, people pop up everywhere.”

Lilia nodded carefully. “I see.” Lilia thought for a moment before saying, “You have a test in Defense Magic coming up, no?”

“Master Lilia, with all due respect, this is not the time to—”

Lilia held up a hand. “Let me finish, Sebek. You share that class with Y/n, if I recall correctly. So why don’t you invite them to study with you? Just the two of you, no one else.”

Sebek’s face brightened. “Master, you prove yourself once again to be a brilliant strategist! I am indebted to you!”

With a bow, Sebek ran off again, finding you in the Mirror Chamber, leaving your dorm portal. “Human!”

“Oh, hey, Sebek!”

“I am requesting that we study together for the Defense Magic test!”

“Oh!” You nodded vigorously. “Yeah, that would be great actually! It’s kind of one of my worst subjects, so it would be a lot of help to study with someone else.”

“And, of course, I know what I’m doing, so you’re in good hands.”

“Alright, do you want to go to the library now?”

“Ah,” Sebek said, “I… got banned for the day for my volume in the library.” He couldn’t tell if his face was warming from the admission or from your amused stare.

You chuckled and said, “What about the courtyard then? We need to actually do spells anyways, so that’s a better option.”

Sebek nodded and you two walked to the courtyard. As you two started studying and practicing together, Sebek learned two things: one, you weren’t lying when you said Defense Magic wasn’t your strong suit. You managed to put a shield around a bench instead of yourself. The second thing was that, while he was okay at the subject, he was nowhere near good enough to really effectively help you study. And if that was the case, how could he help and defend the Young Master if he couldn’t help you, the person he liked, with such a simple thing as Defense Magic? And if he failed the Young Master—

“Jack!” The call of the name snapped Sebek from his downward spiral, and he followed your gaze to Jack, who was jogging across the courtyard. Sebek couldn’t help but grimace when the other boy made his way towards the two of you.

“Hey.”

You asked him, “Your best class is Defense Magic, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you think you have time to help me and Sebek with the shielding spell that’s on the upcoming exam?”

Sebek’s eyes narrowed as he watched Jack’s tail start to wag. Before he could answer you, Sebek interjected, “I’m sure we don’t want to bother Jack on his run.”

“I’m, uh, actually just finishing,” Jack said. “It’s okay, I can help.”

Without warning, you wrapped Jack in a hug, ignoring the sweat clinging to him. “Thank you so much, you’re the best!”

Sebek could only glower at your embrace and at the way Jack’s tail seemed to be rapidly picking up speed by the second. It seemed like he would have to take the loss, retreat for the day, and regroup with Master Lilia to craft a different plan.

[bucketsofmonsters]

To Kill the King - Chapter 3

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

find the full book here

“Leo can we please talk about what just happened because that was weird,” Everand pleaded with him.

“That’s Sir Leo to you, my boy.”

It didn’t feel like the most relevant thing at this exact moment, but Leo had never been great at priorities anyways. “Yes of course sir, sorry sir. I just mean, the princess deciding to save us, did that not strike you as odd? Why would she do that, what does she gain from it?”

Leo gave him a patronizing look as he said, “Now I know you’re quite young and… we’ll say inexperienced but trust me, there are many young women who…”

“No, not… sir she was staring at me the whole time.”

Leo threw back his head as he guffawed. “You always know how to make me laugh, Everand. That’s why I keep you around. Now go tend to the horses, I have to figure out where I fit in in this place.”

“But sir I don’t know where the…” Leo walked out of the room before Everand had the chance to finish his sentence. “Where the stables are, not that you care. I’ll find them myself, it’s fine.”

Everand took to wandering the castle, hoping to stumble upon the stables sooner rather than later. After what felt like an hour of aimless walking, Everand realized he was going to have to find someone to ask for help. Amidst his wandering he saw several busy people he couldn’t quite manage to grab the attention of before they blew past him. He was growing frustrated, determined to pull the attention of the next person he crossed paths with as he turned the corner and saw the same mage girl he’d seen earlier, minus the ridiculous hat. She didn’t seem to notice him, focusing instead on scribbling into a notebook she had pushed against the wall. He slowly walked backwards, not particularly wanting to interact with the girl who had been giving him a death stare earlier. As soon as he quietly left her possible line of sight, he spun around to retrace his steps as far away from her as possible. He rushed off, checking behind him, making sure she wasn’t heading this way and, as he looked behind him, he ran directly into something he was certain hadn’t been there before.

A dark-haired girl stood in front of him holding a big basket full of white cloths. She looked a little dazed but luckily didn’t seem too shaken up by Everand walking directly into her.

 “I’m so sorry,” he said. “I wasn’t looking where I was going. You alright?”

She waved his concern aside as best she could with a basket in both hands and responded, “I’m fine, don’t worry about it.” Then her head cocked to the side for a moment. “Were you not just walking the other way? I’m almost certain I saw you in passing.”

Well, that wasn’t ideal. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m very lost.”

“Oh, I can help you with that. Where are you headed?”

“Uh, the stables ideally. Someone took me and my knight’s horses there when we arrived and I’m supposed to be tending to them.”

“You and your… oh you’re Sir Leo’s squire, aren’t you!”

And there went Everand’s amicable attitude. Of course she got excited as soon as she realized he knew Leo, this is how it always went. Didn’t make it any less irritating though. “The one and only. You were showing me where the stables are?”

“Right of course, apologies. They’re not far from here.”

She gave him a quick rundown of where he needed to go and he headed off immediately, not particularly keen on continuing this conversation any longer. With a rushed, “Thank you” shouted behind him, he hurried off to his destination. 

The girl’s instructions were good and he reached the stables within a few minutes. He felt his annoyance and tension leave his body as he saw Lilypad standing in a stall next to Destrier. He was glad to see they’d been taken care of and he was happier amongst the horses anyways. Leo always told him he was meant to take care of Destrier first but Leo wasn’t around and he had a soft spot for Lilypad. He walked in her stall, giving her some gentle pats along her neck. “You wouldn’t believe the day I’ve had, girl.”

“Do you always talk to your horse?”

Everand nearly jumped out of his skin as he heard someone speak from directly behind him. He whirled around, only to see the young mage sitting on a bale of hay inside Lilypad’s stall, right next to the entrance.

“What are you doing here?” And how did she get here so fast? He couldn’t actually ask her that, he didn’t want her knowing he’d seen her earlier, but she’d been further away from the stables than him and he had come here immediately after seeing her in that hall.

“Looking for you, squire boy,” she said, hopping up to her feet as she did.

“My name’s Everand.”

“I’m sure it is, squire boy.”

He let out an irritated huff but decided not to press it, there were more important things to say. “Why were you looking for me?”

She tilted her head to the side and looked him up and down. He got the distinct impression she could see right into his head and wondered if that was something mages could do. “Why don’t you tell me squire. Why was I looking for you?”

He didn’t have the time nor the patience for this. “I wouldn’t have asked if I knew, mage girl.”

“It’s Mari, actually.”

“Alright, mage girl.” To Everand’s annoyance, she didn’t seem to much care what he called her, or at least not as visibly as Everand did.

“Yeah alright, well I came to find you because you are clearly up to something.”

“The only thing I’m up to is trying to take care of my horse, thank you very much.”

Mari redirected her attention to the aforementioned horse. “She’s beautiful by the way, does she have a name?”

Everand’s voice softened. “She’s called Lilypad.”

Mari laughed to herself, trying and failing to cover it up with a little cough. “Yeah alright, I guess that’s kinda cute. Does she help you commit crimes or do you do those on your own?”

Everand snapped. “For the last time, I just got here and I have no ill intent. I don’t know why you are so convinced I mean harm but I swear to you, I don’t. If you’re so set on bothering someone, go bother Leo. He’s the one who got banished, I’m just here to take care of the horses. I could not care less about you and your stupid little kingdom. You’re magic right? Shouldn’t you be able to test my intentions or read my mind or something instead of poking around in someone else’s business?”

For the first time since they’d started speaking, Mari seemed thrown. She mumbled to herself, barely loud enough for Everand to hear, “I’m not going to waste magic on a nobody like you.”

Everand threw his arms in the air. “If I’m such a nobody, why are you so intent on following me around, huh?”

Mari rolled her eyes again. “Alright, I’ll let you off easy this time, squire. Just know if you do get up to anything you will regret it.”

Everand rubbed his temples. “I’m sure I will. As long as you’re here, you might as well make yourself useful. I’m supposed to go to the squires’ quarters after this, where are they?” He hated asking her for help but he hadn’t seen anyone else in the stables and he didn’t want to have to repeat his little trip around the castle.

“Uhhh, if you go out the backdoor and to the right you’ll see a hedge pathway, it’ll spit you out right at the squires’ quarters. Anyways, just remember I’m watching you. See you around, squire boy.”

Everand muttered to himself, “Unfortunately you probably will.”

She poked her head back through the door and asked, “What was that?”

“I wasn’t talking to you, go away.”

She snorted. “I forgot you talk to your horse, carry on.”

And with that she was gone

. . .

Everand spent as long as he could with Lilypad and Destrier, but eventually he did have to part with them and find his way to his quarters. By the time he left, the sun was just beginning to set and he headed out the backdoor, looking for the hedge pathway Mari had described. He found it pretty quickly, an opening in a massive wall of bushes that led forwards, both sides surrounded by the hedges. He assumed it was some sort of garden he’d be heading through, hoping it was somewhere he was allowed to be. 

He hurried inside, wanting to find his quarters before night fell. The pathway took a right and then another right, which confused him, appearing to loop back on itself. As he continued forwards he found a fork in the path. Wanting to ensure he didn’t double back on himself, he took a left. He’d assumed it would open up to a garden or more open path but the hedges continued to surround him. By the third fork in the path, Everand realized what had happened. The mage hadn’t told him how to get to the squire’s quarters, she’d led him into a maze. Despite her trick, he could find his way out easily enough. He’d only taken about five turns and he definitely remembered them but when he went to return to the fork in the path he’d just travelled through, it was gone. He followed the path back further but the only thing he could find was a single bend to the right that had not been there moments before, no fork in the path to be seen. 

His breathing got heavier as he continued to move through unfamiliar territory that he would’ve sworn up and down did not exist mere minutes prior. As he travelled forwards, not only did the path seem unfamiliar but it gradually got narrower. Not liking the rapidly enclosing space he turned around but as he headed in that direction, the path only continued to get smaller and smaller as he progressed. He could feel the walls bearing in on him. He started to run, wanting to be free of the maze as quickly as possible. He wasn’t sure what was happening but he knew he had to get out so in a moment of panic he threw himself at one of the walls.

It was far easier to break through than he had anticipated and he found himself barreling through the hedge into a thankfully open pathway and slamming into something solid, or perhaps he should say someone solid, who fell to the ground with a yelp. 

“God this keeps happening, I’m sorry the maze just-” And then he looked up and saw who he ran into. The princess rose slowly from the ground, brushing off her white skirt to try and get rid of the dirt the fall had left on it to mixed success. “I am so sorry, I didn’t realize.”

He went to help her stand up properly but she waved him off and gave him a smile. “You should watch where you’re going.”

“Yes princess, sorry princess.”

“That’s really not necessary. You can call me Lorelai.”

“I can’t-”

“Oh of course you can, I insist. Wait, you’re the new squire, aren’t you? I remember you! I don’t think I caught your name.”

“It’s Everand princ- uh Lorelai. My name is Everand.”

She smiled wistfully to herself. “Everand, I like that. It suits you. You look like an Everand. Well, you look like a lot of things.”

Everand knew he should stop this conversation in its tracks but he couldn’t bring himself to. Her voice was kind and her gaze soft and he just wanted to talk with her forever. “What other things do I look like princess?”

She laughed to herself as he called her princess again but she didn’t correct him. “Well, Everand, you look very angry and very tired, and I would say that you look kind.”

Kind wasn’t one he heard often. He would hazard a guess that she thought many people were kinder than they were. That’s the thing about people with soft gazes and sleepy smiles, they liked to see the best in people. “Well, I hope I don’t disappoint you princess.”

“Oh, don’t worry, you won’t. Now what are you doing all the way in here? You just got here and you’ve already decided to try and best the maze? How brave of you. It can be quite tricky.”

“No, I didn’t mean to. I asked for directions from the mage and she told me to go through here because she was trying to kill me or something, I don’t know.”

A hand flew over the princess’s mouth and it almost sounded like she was fighting back laughter. “You’ve met Mari I see. She can be like that with newcomers, terribly sorry about that. I promise you she meant no real harm, she can just be… mischievous at times. She’ll come around though, I can feel it.”

“Didn’t mean me any harm? The maze tried to eat me!”

She nodded solemnly. “She wouldn’t have known that. She doesn’t believe in the maze. Not really. But don’t worry, I do. I think it’s just not your time to be here yet, Everand. Or maybe it is your time and the maze doesn’t like what that means. Either way, I would stay out of here if I were you. Until something changes.”

He looked around at the surrounding walls nervously. “Trust me, I intend to stay far away from this place. Right now, I’m just worried about getting us out of here.”

The princess laughed again. “Oh, don’t worry about that, I can show you out.”

“But the maze-”

“Trust me, Everand, we’ll be alright. Now where were you headed? If I know where we’re going the maze will take us right there.”

“Uh, I was going to the squire’s quarters?”

She nodded and shut her eyes very tight for a few moments before spinning around and looking at the hedges around her. “Please?” Everand could’ve sworn he heard them shifting around them.

Then the princess grabbed Everand’s hand to lead him along the path and he almost fainted. He knew that of all the things he shouldn’t have been doing, holding the princess’s hand alone in a maze was pretty high on the list. But was he going to pull away from her? Not in a million years.

She led him forwards for barely any time at all, no more than thirty paces and already Everand could see a gap in the hedges that lead out to some sort of small building. He held his breath whilst they slowly approached the exit. As the princess walked through the gap, Everand found himself speeding up, not wanting to be in there for too long while the princess was outside the maze and he was not. Suddenly he was very happy they were holding hands so the maze couldn’t slam shut with him inside. As soon as he exited, he finally let himself breathe, letting out a massive sigh of relief. The princess dropped his hand and turned to him with a proud smile plastered across her face.

“I told you I’d get you out of there!”

He couldn’t help but smile back. “Yeah, you did. Thank you.”

She dropped his hand and reached up to brush a strand of hair out of his face, one that had probably fallen there when he’d accidentally slammed into her minutes ago. “No Everand, thank you for trusting me. It means more than you know.”

Before Everand got the chance to respond, or maybe just stare at her dumbstruck, the door in front of them flew open and a kid came barreling out of the door, looking like he was barely fifteen. They seemed to be starting squires off younger and younger lately. When he saw who was standing outside of the door, he came to a screeching halt, staring with wide eyes.

The princess leaned down a little so she was closer to his height. “Hello. This is Everand, our new squire. Can you take him inside and introduce him to everyone for me?”

The kid nodded, awestruck, and the princess ruffled his hair. “Thank you so much. I will be seeing you around, Everand the squire.”

For once he didn’t particularly mind being called a squire. “I look forward to it, princess.”

She gave him one last smile and then turned and walked back into the maze. Everand instinctually went to tell her not to, that it was too dangerous, but he stopped himself. She seemed like she knew what she was doing.

[formulauno98]

Once Upon a Time in Silverstone | Chapter Six

Word Count: 8k

So it was official. You were dating your boss. Not the ideal circumstances but sometimes you had to follow your heart instead of your brain. Ever the sensible pair, you decided to keep things lowkey, until one day they weren't.

Warnings: Eating out (and not the kind you do in a restaurant) 🌶

Author’s Notes: Disclaimer, purely fiction, no-one is married in this alt-universe.

SATURDAY AM

You’d been in the UK for the last week, the longest you’d spent in your home nation since Winter break. Having found a permanent home during the last Summer break, you were almost there in furnishing the place to the point where it felt homely. It was a modern barn conversion, with lots of exposed wood and glass with plush cream furnishings. You’d been so busy with work it had been a true labour of love and you had just one room left to tackle. The house had three bedrooms so naturally, you’d allocated the third to be a walk-in closet, a vision that was yet to be fully realised.

As you stepped over the multitude of shoe boxes that lay scattered across the floor to get to the temporary rail that housed your clothes, you figured it was time to do something about it. You hated the place but there was only one store where you’d be able to find the shelving you needed. Ikea.

You spent the morning browsing their website for the multitude of options that were on offer and decided to bite the bullet and order some shelving units. You would keep the rails for now but you could at least get your shoes and bags off of the floor. Surprisingly they were able to deliver the next day so you pressed the order button and set about clearing some space.

While you were busy tidying, your phone buzzed. Looking down you saw that it was Toto. You hadn’t seen him much since your return to the UK as he’d been in London ironing out some deals while you held the fort in Brackley. In a surprisingly sweet gesture, he’d texted you every day to say good morning and goodnight and had suggested you meet over the weekend.

Morning Y/N, I hope you slept well. Are you around tomorrow morning? I thought we could go for a walk in the country and get some lunch if you’d like? 

Smiling at his surprisingly formal text, you typed out a response.

Hey stranger, I’d love that. The only thing is that I ordered some furniture and it’s supposed to arrive tomorrow morning. Could we have lunch and then a walk?

You returned to your sorting, grinning away to yourself that you were finally going on a date with Toto. You’d started everything backwards so it was nice that he was making the effort. Your phone buzzed again.

Sure. To be safe shall we do a late lunch? I can pick you up at 2?

Sudden panic set in, Toto was coming to your house. He was notorious for being a neat freak and kept everything hidden away in his office. You tried to echo this but you always seemed to accumulate clutter in your office. Your house was even more relaxed as you were always tired when returning from race weekends and often left things lying around.

Sounds good, I’ll share my location so you can find me, my address is not always on GPS. Looking forward to it. x

You followed up with your location as you knew he would never find it without the exact pinpoint. Numerous taxi drivers had failed to find it so you’d taken to just sending coordinates.

Thank you, I’m looking forward to it too. Enjoy the rest of your day! X

You smiled as he signed off with a kiss, something he’d never done before. 

SUNDAY AM

You’d spent the rest of your Saturday frantically tidying and pampering. Even though you knew he’d likely step foot inside your house for all of two seconds and you’d be having a casual lunch in a country pub you wanted everything to look nice, yourself included.

Waking up at eight, you hoped that your furniture would come early so you could perhaps build a unit or two before you needed to get ready. The tracking from Ikea told you that you were the next stop so you busied yourself hoovering the fluffy cream rug in your living room while you waited.

Sure enough, it was not long before the doorbell rang, meaning your shelves had arrived. As you directed the delivery man to leave them in the spare room, you clocked the long boxes and were worried you’d taken on more than you could handle with this build. As soon as he left you set about opening one of the boxes and reading the instructions. It seemed easy enough so you fetched your tool kit and set about building the first of the four shelving units.

To your dismay, it was not as easy as it seemed. You’d got as far as screwing the sides together but no matter how hard you pushed, you couldn’t slide the back panel in. Frustrated, you decided to come back to it and opened the second box, repeating the process and again reaching a sticking point. Huffing you looked at the time and realised with horror that it was past one o’clock and you really needed to get ready. 

Pulling out a black crochet sundress and tan leather gladiator sandals you quickly got ready, hoping this was the right vibe for a first date. Silly as it sounded you had butterflies in your stomach, something you’d not felt for a long time. You took extra care in doing your hair and make-up, trying to go for the no-effort look which of course took double the amount of time and effort. With one final hair tousle and shake you were done, with two minutes to spare.

Punctual as ever, your doorbell rang for the second time that morning, only this time you opened it to a casually dressed Toto, holding a big bunch of pale pink roses.

“I’ve missed you,” he said, leaning down to kiss you chastely. “Here, these are for you.”

Taking the flowers from him, you beamed, “I’ve missed you too. Thank you, they’re beautiful, that’s so sweet, let me go and put them in some water and I’ll be right out. Do you want anything to drink before we go?”

“I’m fine thanks, I’ll wait here,” he said, curiously peering around your entrance hall. You had put up some large art pieces, leant a huge arch-shaped mirror against the wall facing the stairs and had topped a console table with several small frames with family photos. 

As you made your way through to the kitchen your heart was pounding. Toto was a handsome man but you always thought he looked particularly good when he dressed down. Contrary to most, you found the white shirt and black trousered Mercedes uniform a little corporate for your taste.

You carefully placed the roses into the small stoppered section of your sink, turning on the tap and making sure they had enough water. Grabbing your handbag you made to go when Toto came through the doorway to the kitchen.

“I’ve just been admiring your photos, you were a very cute child. I don’t know what happened,” he said with a grin.

You edged closer to Toto, “You are so cheeky, let’s see your childhood photos.” 

“You’ll have to come to my mother’s house for those I’m afraid,” he said, glancing down at you as you set your handbag down on the kitchen island and wrapped your hands around his hips, pulling him closer.

“I’m willing to make the trip,” you said, reaching up to kiss him once more. 

“Good to know,” he replied, breaking the kiss. “Before we go, can I have a tour? I’m curious to see the rest of the house, you never talk about it.”

“Sure why not. So this is the kitchen, where I do the cooking.” You gestured around you at the bright kitchen space with white wooden shaker cabinets topped with light grey marble.

“Oh really, I never could have guessed that.” he said dryly, “I like it. It’s very well finished.” He ran his hand along the marble countertop on the kitchen island, “Did you choose this?”

“Sadly no, this was a large selling point of the house, the kitchens and bathrooms needed nothing changing.”

“Ah that explains why it’s so tasteful.” he said, slipping his arm around your shoulders, “I can’t believe I’ve never been here.”

“Shh.” you said, wriggling playfully out of his grip and turning to face him, “I’ve never been to your place to be fair and I have only had Rosie and George over a few times.”

“George has been here?” asked Toto, surprised.

“Of course he has, he and Rosie are joined at the hip these days and she lives just down the road.”

“I suppose.” Toto said, “I’ve not had many people come over to mine.”

“Ooh, so I’ll await my invite with bated breath,” you said.

“I’d love to have you over, I can cook for you if you want?” said Toto.

“You cook?”

“Of course I do. I enjoy it, it relaxes me.”

“How have we never discussed this?”

“How have you never told me anything about your house?”

“Fair enough, want to see the rest of it?”

“Please, lead the way.”

You made your way out of the sunny kitchen to the dining nook. The back wall was panelled with glass that opened onto a small patio and garden.

“This is nice Y/N,” said Toto, “I like this,” he said, gesturing at the huge blue Ed Ruscha print that hung at one end of the room.

“Ah, thanks, my Dad got it for me years ago. It’s travelled everywhere with me,” you said, surprised Toto was interested in your art.

“Your father sounds interesting, you should bring him to a race one day,” Toto said.

“Funnily enough I was thinking about inviting him to Mexico. I know it’s a few months away but I think he’d love it,” you said.

“You should ask Lara and she will arrange tickets.” Toto said kindly, “I’d also like to meet him.”

“You’re a braver man than most,” you laughed, knowing that your Dad would not be thrilled about you dating a man more than twenty years your senior.

“I’m sure I can win him over,” said Toto hopefully.

“Hmm let’s see,” you said unconvinced, “Do you want to see the rest of the house?”

“Of course,” said Toto, lightly brushing your hip.

You made your way back into the hallway and through another doorway to the living room. This was the most impressive room in the house as it had a double-height ceiling and again, an entirely glass back wall. You’d bought a vintage mid-century blown glass chandelier to fill the space and artfully arranged a cream boucle sofa and two armchairs around the cosy fire. 

“Wow,” exclaimed Toto, “This is amazing.”

Pleased as punch you smiled at him, “It’s alright I guess.”

“I love it, I need your help to redesign my place.”

You smiled, “Of course, for a fee.”

Toto laughed, “It’s always business first with you.”

“I’ll even give you a family and friends discount since I kind of like you.” you teased, “Want to see upstairs?”

“You’re too kind,” said Toto as you grabbed his hand and led him upstairs to the galleried landing. There was a small open section that looked down into the living room before it turned into a corridor with various doors on it.

You started to lead the way down the corridor, purposefully skipping the door to the third bedroom that contained your mess from earlier. Not missing a trick, Toto tugged on your hand, “What’s that door?”

“Oh, nothing special, just a cupboard,” you said, hoping he’d let it go.

“You forget Y/N. I know you well enough to know when you’re not telling the truth. Is it a cupboard full of all the mess like Monica in Friends?”

“You’ve watched Friends?” you asked incredulously.

“Of course I did, I’m not that old.” Toto replied, “It is definitely that, you’re blushing.”

“No I’m not!” you said, knowing full well that your flushed cheeks were betraying you. The effect this man had on you was quite something.

Toto reached out and grabbed you by the hips, grinding yours into his. “You’re sexy when you blush. It turns me on.”

Your hand found his chest as your lips met, your stomach doing backflips.

“Why don’t I show you the bedroom?” you said seductively.

“Nice try, I want to see the cupboard first,” said Toto, continuing to run his hands up and down your hips, exploring your curves as if for the first time.

“You are relentless,” you said, before turning around and pulling him towards the door, “I must warn you, it’s a mess.”

“I knew it!” said Toto smugly.

You opened the door to reveal your two half-built bookcases and empty boxes strewn across the carpet, power tools laid down and abandoned.

‘That’s not what I was expecting. I didn’t take you as the DIY type.” said Toto, disappointed not to find something weird and wonderful.

“Now that’s the thing, I thought I could be, but turns out I’m not,” you said, blushing deeper than ever before.

“What happened?” asked Toto, bending down to inspect your handiwork, “Surely you just slide this back piece in and it’s done?”

“Easier said than done. I tried but I’m not strong enough so I gave up,” you said exasperatedly, crouching down beside Toto.

“How are you planning to finish them?” he asked.

“I hadn’t thought that far ahead.” you shrugged.

“Do you want me to try?” Toto asked, turning to you.

“No, honestly don’t worry I’ll figure it out. We should go.”

“Don’t be silly, it will take two minutes, grab that end and I’ll slide it in,” he said, standing up and rolling up his sleeves. You couldn’t help but gulp as the veins in his arms flexed.

“That’s what she said,” you replied with a smirk.

“You are so dirty, I’ll slide it somewhere after this,” growled Toto.

With Toto’s help, you made quick work of finishing the two shelving units, even propping them up and fixing them to the wall. As he finished screwing the second one in, Toto looked behind him and saw the two remaining boxes. “Jesus, are there more?”

Guiltily you replied, “Yes but don’t worry, two is enough for now.”

“Nonsense,” Toto said as he set about unboxing the third unit. You watched in awe as he managed to connect the panels without as much as a glance at the instruction booklet.

“How are you so good at this? As if you have ever even set foot in an Ikea,” you said, crossing your arms as you watched him screw the panels together.

“Of course I’ve been to Ikea, who hasn’t?” Toto said, leaning back on his heels to admire his work.

“You’re full of surprises today,” you said, bending down to kiss him softly, forgetting that he’d get a full view of your bare breasts in your sundress. You’d opted not to wear a bra as the straps were thin.

“Mmm, no bra? Now you’re the one full of surprises,” said Toto, pulling you down into his lap, your back flush against his chest, his large hands wrapping around your waist in a way that you’d fantasised about many a time. He ran his hands up and down your torso, kissing your neck in exactly the right spot.

Just as things were starting to heat up and you could feel Toto hardening behind you, his pocket started vibrating.

“Ooh that feels good,” you joked.

“Not as good as I’m going to make you feel later,” said Toto, nuzzling your neck as he pulled out his phone, “It’s George, mind if I take it?”

“Of course not, shall I leave you in peace?” you asked.

“No, stay right here,” he said, a strong arm swooping around and trapping you where he knelt, his now prominent erection pressing into you from behind. “Hello, George.”

You could hear murmurs from the other line, George loved to chat so you resigned yourself to being stuck on Toto’s lap for a while. Wanting to rile him up, you ground up and down as he tried to keep a level tone with George, who’d called with some kind of problem.

“Look, I’m sure it’s no big deal, let me call them first thing tomorrow.” said Toto, his breathing getting heavier,, “I am sorry to do this but I need to go, I’m in the middle of building furniture.” More murmurs followed before Toto said his goodbye “Don’t worry about it, any time George. And don’t panic. Talk later.”

As he put down his phone, he growled once again, “You are so bad, so where were we?” his hands now running up your torso towards your breasts.

“I believe you said you were going to slide it in?” you said breathlessly, the grinding turning you on a ridiculous amount.

“I did say that, didn’t I?” he said, running his hand back down to where your pussy was starting to throb. With a deft movement, he flicked the bottom of your dress up, revealing your skimpy mesh thong. “Fuck me, no bra and this?” he exclaimed as he took in the barely-there fabric, his long fingers getting tantalisingly close to where you needed them the most.

“You’re fucking hot, you know that right?” you said, breaking free of his grip and turning around to straddle him where he sat on the carpet.

“Not as hot as you,” he replied, catching your lips with his as his hands wandered closer and closer to the sweet spot. Kissing you deeply, his fingers suddenly delved under the mesh and found your clit, drawing slow and careful circles.

It wasn’t long before he found a rhythm that got you moaning. “You like that?” he asked as you closed your eyes in pleasure.

“Mmm” was all you managed as he slipped a long finger in, testing you out before adding a second.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” he smirked, pumping his fingers in and out a few times before curling them in exactly the right spot.

“Fuck me,” you exclaimed breathily, his fingers filling you most satisfyingly.

“Don’t mind if I do.” he said, withdrawing his fingers and swiftly removing you from his lap, flipping you over and laying you gently on the floor, opening your legs and settling between them, “But first I want to do this.”

Before you had a chance to ask what it was he wanted to do he proceeded to kiss down your neck, his hands exploring every inch of your body as he pushed your dress up. He quickly divested you of your underwear and brought his mouth to your dripping wet pussy, his tongue bringing you to the edge embarrassingly quickly. Trying to grab at something and finding only carpet, you decided now was the time to ruffle your hands through his hair, something you’d been wanting to do for a long time.

You moaned as every lick brought you closer to the edge, his strong arms squeezing either side of your thighs as he bobbed up and down.

“Fuck!” you exclaimed as you got there, your pussy clenching hard as you came.

“Record timing,” said Toto as he came back up to kiss you squarely on the lips, your heart pounding.

“Why is everything a competition with you?” you laughed, feeling very warm and fuzzy as Toto lingered on top of you.

“Not everything, just things I care about,” he said, kissing your neck gently.

“Well, it’s only fair if I try to beat your time, no?” you said, grabbing at the waistband of his chinos.

“No, no, I wanted to do that, we have plenty of time later, it gets me off to get you off.” he said, batting your hand away, kissing you one last time on the neck before propping himself up to a kneeling position, carefully rearranging your dress,, “Besides, I have shelves to build.”

“For real?” you asked.

“Of course, I’m a man of my word,” he said, flashing you a charming grin.

– – – 

True to his word, Toto helped you build the remaining two shelves and fix them to the wall. It was almost annoying how easily he slotted everything together, but you guessed he had the size and strength advantage on his side.

As he bolted the last shelf to the wall, he stepped back to admire his handiwork. “Not bad.” he smiled, slipping an arm around your shoulders, “What are you putting on these shelves anyway? Are you turning this into an office?”

“Well… not exactly, I got them for my shoes and bags,” you said, feeling like a bimbo.

He chuckled, “Of course you are, the woman of many bags.”

You laughed, “I’m surprised you noticed.”

“I notice everything,” he said, glancing down at you fondly.

“I feel really bad that you planned this nice day for us and then spent it indoors building furniture, do you want to go for a late lunch?”

“Well I already ate,” he said very seriously before cracking up and laughing at his own joke.

“Hilarious,” you said with a poker face.

“You know you love it.” 

“Maybe,” you said, reaching up to caress his face, “Let’s go, we can beat the rush.”

“Sure. Let me just find my phone, I put it down somewhere.” Toto dropped his arm from around you, searching around the room before spotting his phone, on the floor in the corner. Bending down to pick it up, his eyes widened, “Scheiße!”

“What’s up?” you asked, concerned that something bad had happened.

Toto stood up, muttering under his breath as he stood up and passed the phone over. “Look.”

You glanced down to read the notifications, all from George.

14:42 Toto, I don’t know why but it won’t let me hang up. Is that Y/N with you?

14:46 Don’t think I’m supposed to be hearing this. 

14:48 Right so I managed to turn my phone off and break the connection. Don’t worry I won’t tell anyone.

14:50 Well Rosie is with me but she won’t tell either.

14:51 I’ll leave you to it.

“Fuck.” you exclaimed as you finished reading the thread of messages. “How does that even happen?”

“I don’t know, I thought I had hung up.” said Toto, horrified, “I don’t know how much he heard but it was enough for him to say that.”

You grimaced, cringing as you tried to recall what you might have said to each other in the throes of passion. “I can’t believe Rosie was there too, maybe we just have a quiet word with them both tomorrow? I take Rosie, you take George?” you suggested, trying to think how to make this situation less awkward. Rosie of course knew a certain amount but you weren’t about to let Toto know that.

“No, I think we talk to them together.” said Toto, “It’s better that we put on a united front. I don’t want them to think we’re fucking about.”

You raised your eyebrow, “But isn’t that exactly what we were just doing?”

“No, we are more serious.” Toto said, his expression neutral, “I know it is early days but I know that I want to make this work long-term.”

Surprised by his admission you wrapped your arms around him, gazing up into his chocolate-brown eyes, “I do too.”

“You do?” he said.

“Why would you think I wouldn’t? I wouldn’t risk it all for a one-time thing. I like you Toto, a lot. Christ knows we spend enough time with each other.”

Toto smiled, dimples forming, “I’m glad you say that. I like you a lot too.”

“Well, glad that’s settled then, shall we go and get a bite to eat?” you suggested.

MONDAY AM

As you walked into your office on Monday morning, you felt nervous for the first time in a long time. You’d discussed with Toto a game plan on what to say to George and Rosie, making your mission first thing to put some time in with them. Sophie, your ever-helpful EA, had been curious why you, Toto, George and Rosie had needed to urgently meet on a Monday morning as you didn’t normally call meetings first thing, let alone with such a random assortment of people. You were grateful for her but sometimes she asked too many questions for her own good.

“Toto wants to discuss George’s participation in Drive to Survive.” you lied.

“But why does Rosie need to be there? Surely Emily should be there too?” asked Sophie. 

She had a point as Emily was George’s press officer. You quickly thought on your feet, “No, just Rosie for this one, she has been assisting me closely on the scripts for the talking heads.”

“Oh, I see, that makes sense. Are you sure you don’t want me to add Emily? Or I can take minutes?”

“Honestly, it’s fine Sophie, Rosie will take minutes,” you said, trying not to get annoyed as Sophie was only trying to help.

“No worries, I’ve just checked with Lara and ten thirty works for Toto.”

Feigning surprise, you thanked Sophie, “Great, thank you for sorting that out.” Of course, you knew full well that Toto could do ten thirty as you’d discussed it last night over a glass of wine.

“No problem, is there anything else?”

“No, that's all for now, thank you Sophie.” you bid your assistant goodbye as she left your office.

Rosie had of course texted you last night. You were close and you felt extra awkward as you had outright lied to her before.

Y/N, did we hear what we thought we just heard? 

You hadn’t wanted to reply without Toto so left it at that.

Hey Rosie, let’s catch up tomorrow. I’m so sorry. X

Ever the understanding friend, she had replied with a simple.

Oh God, I hope you are okay! I’m sorry if we ruined anything. Speak tomorrow x

Ten-thirty came around quickly and as you made your way next door to Toto’s office you were relieved to see that he was sitting at his desk alone. As you shut the door behind you he looked up and smiled at you, peering over his round glasses.

“So…” he said awkwardly, “How did you sleep?”

Taking the seat opposite him you grimaced, “I won’t lie, I didn’t have the best night’s sleep, how about you?”

“Four hours tops.” he sighed, taking off his glasses and leaning forward to look into your eyes, “You still look beautiful, how do you do it?”

Shaking your head you replied, “I really don’t but I’ll take the compliment.” Aware of Toto’s glass-walled office you discreetly reached out for his hand across the desk, “Don’t fret, you’re his boss, what’s he going to say?”

Toto looked worried, “I worry that he will lose respect for me…”

“Hey, am I that hideous?” you said.

“I’m not going to warrant such a silly question with an answer,” he cooed, “What’s the saying? You don’t shit where you eat?”

“You and your analogies,” you rolled your eyes, dropping his hand as you spied George walking towards the door out of the corner of your eye.

Toto stood up to greet George, gesturing for him to sit down on the chair beside you.

“Hello George, how are you today?”

Looking incredibly awkward, George managed a quiet “Good thank you, and yourselves?”

“Good.” you and Toto replied in unison.

Trying to break the tension Toto fussed around pulling up another chair to his side of the desk, “Y/N, do you want to come here so Rosie has a seat when she comes?”

“Sure,” you said, offering George a sympathetic look. Poor guy was probably scarred for life. Thankfully Rosie came in, looking less worried than her boyfriend.

“Morning Toto, morning Y/N,” she said chirpily, taking your recently vacated seat next to George.

“Good morning,” said Toto, sitting back in his chair and folding his hands in his lap. “So I don’t want to make this too painful but we have the elephant in the room. First of all, I wanted to say how sorry I am, I don’t know how it happened as I am certain I hung up, but you shouldn’t have had to hear what you overheard. I hope you don’t think lowly of us.” he paused, “Secondly, this is not the way we wanted you to find out but recently Y/N and I have become romantically involved and would appreciate your discretion on this. It’s new and I’m hoping it will be something long-term…”

“Eee,” Rosie squealed, barely containing her joy.

“Rosie!” you hissed as Toto looked rather taken aback.

“Well that’s not the reaction I expected, thank you for your blessing Rosie.” Toto smiled. “Like I was saying, we’re hoping to go the distance but it’s new and I would appreciate this not going beyond this room.”

“Of course,” said Rosie. “For what it’s worth, I’m really happy for you. Y/N helped protect George and me in the early days and we’ll obviously do the same.”

George had still not said a single word and you saw Rosie give him a not-so-subtle kick under the desk.

“We won’t tell anyone,” he said blankly, less enthusiastically than his girlfriend.

“Thank you both,” said Toto curtly, his brow furrowed as he tried to scrutinise the young driver.

“Toto,” said George quietly.

“Yes?”

“How long has this been going on?”

Toto looked at you for guidance on what to say before you sighed, knowing it was time to fess up. “Not long, since Montreal. It’s very new.”

George and Rosie exchanged a look, before George answered carefully, “I see, did it happen by any chance when you both missed the team dinner?”

You smiled weakly, “I don’t want to scar you with the details but yes, we got talking and one thing led to another.” You shot an apologetic glance towards Rosie but you needn’t have worried as she couldn’t have looked happier at your admissions.

Toto blushed, clearly casting his memory back to that night. It had been unexpected but certainly memorable.

“Knew it. And you being weird to each other on the plane, were you trying to hide it?” George continued his line of questioning.

You both nodded.

“I see.”

You exchanged a glance with Toto, not sure what to make of George’s interrogation.

“George, I am sorry you had to find out this way, and Rosie too,” Toto said, sighing.

“It’s okay,” said George, looking down at his feet before looking up with a glint in his eye and adding “You sounded like you were having a great time.”

It was your turn to blush, you still struggled to recall what you’d said in the moment but you knew it had to have been spicy. For once in his life, Toto was speechless and his mouth dropped open at George’s cheeky comment.

“George!” exclaimed Rosie, playfully slapping him on the shoulder, making him break out into a wide smile.

You smiled gratefully at Rosie for breaking the tension and decided it was time to wrap this meeting up, “Well I’m glad you’re not too scarred.”

“Oh no, I am,” said George, “I need therapy and ear bleach.”

“Very funny,” said Toto.

George grinned away at his boss, content with making him squirm with embarrassment. “It’s okay Toto, we’re all human and to be honest, I wasn’t that surprised. Everybody has been saying you two should get together.”

Toto’s eyebrows shot up, “Who’s everybody?”

George exchanged a panicked look with Rosie, “Um, just a few people.”

“Which people?” you interjected.

“Well…” George started to talk but was interrupted by a knock on the door. It was Lara of all people.

Toto looked a little annoyed but called out, “Yes, come in.”

Lara opened the door and strode in, greeting you all with a nod, “Good morning all, I am so sorry to interrupt but I have Ola on the other line. He says it’s urgent.”

“Fine, I’ll take it,” said Toto.

“Great, I’ll put him through,” said Lara, making an exit.

“We’ll leave you in peace then.” you said, turning to Toto, “Glad we talked.”

“Thank you Y/N, and thank you both for being so understanding.” Toto said, sighing as his conference phone started to ring, “I had better take this.”

“Thank you, Toto, see you later,” said George, getting up.

“Yes thank you, Toto,” said Rosie, “See you soon.”

You met Toto’s eyes softly and smiled as he picked up the phone and mouthed, “See you.”

As you made your way out of his office and into yours, you caught up with George and Rosie.

“Thank you both,” you said kindly, “We appreciate it.”

“Honestly it’s fine.” said George, “If anything it gave us a laugh yesterday. Our Sunday was very dull compared to yours.”

You blushed again, “Jesus, you’re never going to let us live this down are you.”

“Nope,” the young couple said in unison.

“Right, well I’d better go and get some work done, I’ll see you both later,” you said as you opened your office door.

“Yes, and we’ll have a full debrief later,” said Rosie.

You sighed, “Of course.”

– – – 

The rest of the morning was filled with meetings and it wasn’t until later in the day that you managed to catch up with Rosie. You were strictly supposed to be meeting to discuss an upcoming media day but inevitably the conversation began with the morning’s meeting.

“I’m sorry about this morning, Toto was mortified and so am I. And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, it was brand new...” you began.

“Honestly don’t worry about it, we’re all adults and I understand why you didn’t want to spill yet. I just want the juicy details. From what we heard he sounds good.” said Rosie, a grin forming,. “When you say you got together in Montreal did you sleep together? What we heard didn’t sound like the first time.”

You paused, knowing that Toto wouldn’t want you to share too much, “You are awful. For the record, yes, I spent the night in his room, yes we had sex and no you are not getting any further details.”

“Oooh.” said Rosie, “But I bet he’s good, no?”

“Jeez, you are not going to let this go are you.” you groaned, “You have to swear to me that you’re not going to tell a soul, and if you do I will assign you all transcription duties from now until the end of next season.”

“Deal,” said Rosie.

“Okay, well yes he knows what he’s doing.” you said, “Happy?”

“Knew it.” she said smugly, “I wish I could get George to do what I think he was doing.”

“Rosie!” you exclaimed, “Thank you for that vision.”

“Sorry, just saying though,” said Rosie.

You laughed, “You are terrible, you know that right?”

“Yes, it’s why you love me.” said Rosie, opening up her notebook, “So about this media day…”

SATURDAY PM

As your office was so close to Silverstone, the weekend so far had been well and truly a home Grand Prix. The media day on Thursday had been busy, as had Free Practice on Friday but it was nice being able to go home and sleep in your own bed as opposed to a hotel. By the time Saturday rolled around you were feeling refreshed and ready to tackle whatever challenges the day threw at you. 

Unfortunately, qualifying had been somewhat of a disaster with Lewis’ engine blowing out and the garage scrambling to get the car ready in time for the race. He’d managed a paltry P14 and ran the risk of a penalty if too many parts were changed. George hadn’t fared much better, barely scraping P8. Toto had been inundated with post-qualifying media requests, all wanting to be involved in the drama.

Finishing up one last interview with Sky, you both returned to Toto’s office for a debrief. As Toto sat down opposite you, he bowed his head and ran his hands through his hair, something you now knew meant that he was feeling stressed.

“What a fuck-up.” he said, frustrated with the outcome.

“Don’t say that, we’ve come back from worse,” you said, trying to reassure him.

“This is bad Y/N, we can’t afford to fuck up like this.”

Getting up out of your chair you made your way across to Toto, putting an arm around him and stroking his shoulder, trying to ease out the tension, “The team is working on it. Yes, we might be here all night but they’re a brilliant bunch of guys and they’ll sort it. You have the best driver in the world in the car tomorrow, if anyone will make up the points it’s Lewis.”

Toto looked up at you and smiled resignedly, “You’re much more optimistic than me. I have to think about the worst possible outcome.” 

“There’s my little ray of sunshine,” you laughed, bending down to kiss him gently. Just as you were mid-peck, Toto’s door burst open to reveal a harassed-looking Lara.

“Oh.” said Lara, “I can come back, I didn’t know you had company”

You leapt up, taking a wide step away from Toto. 

“Well, that’s a bit late now, isn’t it?” said Toto bluntly.

“Indeed,” said Lara, her expression unreadable.

Feeling incredibly awkward you shuffled around to the other side of Toto’s desk, unsure of what Lara was going to say next.

“Look, I know that you are well aware that Y/N are close but there have been recent developments…” Toto said, pausing as if choosing his words carefully, “We have grown very fond of each other and we’ve started seeing each other outside of work.”

Lara raised her eyebrows, “Oh, I see.” She turned to you, shooting you a particularly dirty look before muttering under her breath, “Now everything makes sense.”

“What makes sense Lara?” you said, immediately ready to unleash your temper. Lara was always full of snide remarks to you and your team but was always sneaky enough to refrain in front of her boss. 

Looking annoyed, Toto stood up, using his imposing height to his full advantage,, “Sorry, I did not catch that.”

Lara turned back towards her boss, seemingly oblivious to his bubbling anger, “I don’t want to misstep here Toto but everyone says Y/N only got the job because she’s young and pretty.”

“Who is this everyone?” said Toto, a vein starting to pop in his forehead.

“Everyone in the paddock,” said Lara, folding her arms smugly before turning back to you “They’ve seen the way she flirts with everybody, wearing the tightest uniform she could find.”

Toto took a step forward, “Get out.”

“Excuse me?” said Lara, taken aback.

“You heard me, get out.” said Toto, “Never insinuate that about Y/N. We hired her because she was a good fit for the team. I have never been so insulted in my life.”

“Toto, that’s not what I was saying,” Lara said, now desperately trying to backtrack.

“I know what you were trying to say,” Toto said, his tone level but his eyes narrowed with anger.

“Look, whatever this is, I didn’t see anything,” said Lara holding her hands up.

“Okay.” said Toto flatly, “Please apologise to Y/N.”

“Why?” said Lara indignantly.

“Lara, you are on thin ice. I am this close to going down to HR and telling them what happened. I don’t seem to remember you being so judgmental when I caught you sucking Ed’s dick on the beach in Zandvoort, but maybe you’ve forgotten that?”

You were stunned, Toto had never told you this story. It explained Lara’s strange attitude, knowing that your boss had witnessed you going down on one of the mechanics would definitely throw the dynamic out.

“Toto, that’s low.” said Lara, “It was a one-time thing. I thought we agreed to never bring it up, especially not in front of company.”

“I am not going to have you chastise me for doing something when you did something ten times worse. And I’m not going to stand by and let you insult someone who I care very deeply about” Toto came to your side, resting his arm behind you.

Sensing she was defeated Lara conceded, “Fine, you do whatever you want, I won’t judge. I think you could do better though Toto, she’s not all that.”

You could now feel Toto shaking with rage behind you, “What did you just say?”

Lara shrugged, “I just think you could do better. Why would you want this short thing that looks like she’s been around the block and then some?”

At that it was your turn to fly off the handle, “I’m sorry Lara but what the fuck is your problem? Do you have a thing for Toto?”

“Of course not.” Lara hissed as there was suddenly a knock at the door. “Fuck, that’s Lewis and George, that’s why I came up here. They wanted to talk to you.”

Toto dropped his arm from behind you and took a step back, “Lara, we will pick up this discussion later.”

“Fine,” she huffed.

“We will talk. Well, why are you just standing there, let them in,” commanded Toto.

“I’m going to leave you in peace,” you said, trying to edge out past Lara as she opened the door.

“Hey guys, everything okay?” said Lewis.

“Yes thank you, I was just leaving, I’ll be next door if you need me, with Lara,” you said firmly.

“Fine,” said Lara, still sulking.

“Hi guys,” said George cheerily, his smile dropping when he clocked the stony faces in the room. 

“Hello.” said Toto, very seriously, “What can I do for you?”

As you closed the door you took one last look at Toto, who looked positively livid, with not a trace of the warmth that normally danced across his face. He had a scary temper and you were always glad to not be on the receiving end. You silently wished Lewis and George luck knowing that he was not going to be receptive to whatever they had to say.

Making your way out into the office outside of yours and Toto’s, you turned to Lara, “Lara, look I’m sorry about that. I really am, it was unprofessional of me but he is stressed and I was just trying to help.”

Lara huffed, “I have to deal with him when he’s stressed but I tend to not shove my tongue down his throat.”

“For fuck’s sake, it was a quick peck Lara, calm down,” you said exasperated.

“Oh that’s interesting, who else do you do this with?” she said sassily.

“What is your problem? Honestly, do you have a thing for Toto?” 

“Of course, I don’t. Better you than me on that one.”

“So why are you so upset?”

“Because you don’t know the amount of shit he has given me for the Ed incident.” she said, suddenly lowering her voice, “He has held that above me for three years, one fuck up and I just know he’ll go to HR.”

“Toto’s not like that.” you said, shaking your head, “There must be more to it.”

“Ed’s married, Y/N,” she said. “Toto said he’d tell his wife if he ever went near me or any other woman in the team again.”

Your eyes widened, “Oh.”

“Oh indeed,” said Lara, “As I said, it was a one-time thing, you know how drunk everyone gets in Zandvoort. We went to the beach in the evening and one thing led to another and you know… and then who the fuck takes a beach walk at night alone. Toto scared the hell out of us, coming looming out of the dark. I get why he was angry but he got personal when he shouldn’t have stuck his nose in.”

“I see,” you said, still trying to figure Lara out. Now it made sense why she was not particularly friendly with the rest of the team, “Look, we all make mistakes. I’m sure he was just trying to protect you.”

“But it’s so chauvinistic, I don’t need protecting. And now I find out he’s a filthy hypocrite. The lecture he gave Ed and me about not starting relationships with co-workers and I find out he’s doing it.”

“I understand why you’re upset. Let’s let him cool off and we’ll talk again later? For now, I’d really appreciate you keeping things quiet.”

“Who am I going to tell?” said Lara, shrugging her shoulders.

– – – 

SUNDAY AM

You woke up early on Sunday morning, thoroughly exhausted having stayed at the track until four thirty, waiting for the car to be repaired and everyone to be happy. You hadn’t needed to stay but thought it best to diffuse the Lara situation as soon as possible. When you’d finally gone back to speak with Toto he was much more relaxed and had even apologised to Lara for his previous behaviour. More shockingly, Lara had returned to your office at eleven o’clock at night with a hot chocolate as a peace offering and apologised profusely. You still couldn’t figure her out but it seemed that she was willing to keep quiet for now.

It was a bizarre situation, you barely knew what Toto’s intentions were but had found yourself defending your fledgling relationship twice in the first week. You hoped it wasn’t an omen for things to come as you were starting to fall hard for the man.

As you made your way through the paddock you felt uneasy seeing how well-rested the other teams looked. No one else had had car issues like Lewis and you couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy towards your fresh-faced Ferrari counterpart who probably enjoyed a good eight hours of sleep. When you finally made it to your office you poked your head around Toto’s door to find his office empty. 

Morning, are you down in the garage? X

You’d barely put your phone down when it buzzed with Toto’s reply.

Morning beautiful, yes, they asked me down for some final tweaks. Let me know when you need me for Sky. x

You smiled, he was a very diligent Team Principal and it wasn’t a rare occurrence for him to be down in the thick of the action. His first media appearance wasn’t until noon so you had plenty of time to push on with your work for the day.

SUNDAY PM

The afternoon’s race had been a stark contrast to the previous day’s disaster. Lewis had put in a heartstopping drive and had fought his way all the way to P2, with George not too far behind at P3. You watched from the edge of your seat in the garage as the laps ticked over, Lewis edging closer and closer to the race leader, Max Verstappen.

Against all odds, your team were in for a double podium finish and the mood in the garage was electrifying. It was lap forty out of fifty-two and things were on the up, however, little did you all know that they were about to get even better. 

Verstappen had pushed his tyres to the absolute limit having gone on a different strategy to Lewis and George, relying on an undercut that never came to fruition. Lewis and George were gaining on him and fast. The battle that ensued was one that would surely go down in the history books as Lewis spectacularly overtook his arch-rival on the second to last lap. The applause from the home crowd was thunderous and you couldn’t believe your eyes as George perfectly executed the same move on the last lap. From P14 and P8 to P1 and P2 at their home Grand Prix. You couldn’t have dreamed of a better result and everyone in the garage was beaming. As the chequered flag was waved, Toto leapt up and scooped you up in his arms, lifting you in the air and spinning around, unable to contain his joy, much to the amusement of all those around you. As he put you back down on the floor, you saw a few bemused faces behind Toto and Lara smirking away as she clapped for her team. Maybe she wasn't so bad after all.

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Well, I’ve had a hell of a week. So far since last weekend, I have:

- Had a conversation with my roommate after which I became sure I would not be able to stay in my house. There’s been a whole thing for the last couple of months where my roommate is moving out and has tried to give our place to someone else, but I very much like this place (for reasons that range from good price and good location and it’s a good house, to I get too emotionally attached to places where I spend too much time) and want to stay here, and it’s long and complicated but basically I’ve had two months of being constantly stressed due to uncertainty about where I’ll be living in the fall. Then last weekend, I had a very confrontational call with my roommate – and I don’t do confrontation well – in which he informed that he was going to do something I had not previously thought of in order to give the house away, I was pretty sure it would work, got very upset due to the unexpected confrontation and due to the fact that I became sure I wouldn’t be able to stay here.

- Three days later, a couple of other people talked to my roommate, I talked to the landlord, a few things changed (including – I’m not saying my roommate will listen to men but not women, but when our male mutual friend made all the exact same points to him that I did, suddenly they made sense), and I’m now pretty sure I can keep the place. More sure than I’ve been for two months. The first time in two months that I’ve been able to lift almost all of that stress off my shoulders, and it’s an amazing feeling. I almost hesitate to write this for fear of inviting the worst, since nothing’s signed yet, it’s not for sure. Also I do still have to find a new roommate to cover the other half of the rent because his subletter’s moving out. But I can figure that out. It’s a huge relief to know it’ll very likely be okay.

- On Monday night, I accompanied my brother to one of his comedy shows, a decision I made partly to take my mind off worrying about whether I’d get to stay in my place (since I hadn’t yet heard the good news about that getting better). My brother convinced me to put my name in a draw, where whatever name they pick gets to perform in the one spot they keep open for that. My fucking name got picked. I performed stand-up comedy for the first time. I recited some shit that I wrote a while ago and have wanted to perform but haven’t had the guts to try before. It went much better than I’d expected, though that’s only because I’d expected it to be a catastrophic failure. In reality it went fine. People laughed more than one time, which wildly exceeded my expectations. Afterward, several comedians and several audience members came up to me to say I did well. Some were presumably just being nice (I’m sure “just being nice” also factored into the laughs, as I did immediately tell them this was my first time doing it), but they seemed to mean it, at least a bit. I think it actually was all right for a first time. Afterward I hung around the bar and drank with comedians and it was the first time in ages that I can remember having so much fucking fun without any part of it being difficult.

- On Wednesday, I went out to a live Celtic music night. This is because a couple of weeks before that, my parents went to a folk festival out East and saw a few of my favourite singers, and that made me sad, because I used to go see music all the time, and I stopped in 2020, and I’ve seen a couple of music things since then but not many, and I miss it. So, it occurred to me, there’s nothing stopping me from just starting it again. The day after the folk festival that I missed, I Googled folk music in my area, found a reasonably priced Celtic music night at a venue that’s relatively near me, that I’d never heard of because it just opened during the pandemic. I checked its schedule and it has a lot of stuff that I like, including monthly Celtic music nights. This sort of thing is part of why I care so much about staying in my place that’s downtown. Near my sport. Near my friend. Near comedy. Near live music. I’ve spent so much time staying in my house not doing stuff, I’m only just starting to do stuff again, I want to do everything, that is not a good time to lose my downtown housing.

So on Wednesday, I walked to this new music venue, and it’s so good. So good. The perfect size, big enough to fit enough of a crowd to bring in touring musicians, not big enough for the size of the room to impact enjoyment. Capacity of about 90 people, I think, and well spread out. Stage with enough room for a band with lots of instruments. A building that was clearly made with acoustics in mind, the sound quality was fantastic. And when I got there, I didn’t want to pay for the overpriced water bottles you get at venues, but I was so hot and thirsty from the walk that I decided it was worth it. So I asked at the counter for a bottle of water, and they told me I could just take a cup and fill it from their water cooler for free. I will be returning to that venue.

Then they played music! God, it’s been so long since I’ve seen that stuff live, I love it. It was a band I didn’t know, but was made of four people, two of whom I did know, from other projects they’ve done. Three were local and one from out East. They all knew their shit, played a bunch of classics and some of their own stuff. Stuck very closely to the “Celtic” remit (unlike some bands that will just define “Celtic music” as “anything with a fiddle”), explained the history of every song and tune, it was mainly Scottish and some Irish and a few Cornish songs. Was fucking beautiful. The show was just about to start when I got a text from my roommate telling me he’d spoken to the landlord and I’ll get more details later but I’m going to be able to stay in the house.

- On Thursday, I went out to a different comedy night. This is one I’ve been to before, a pub that runs comedy every Thursday just around the corner from my house. I went a bunch of weeks in a row this spring, and hadn’t been for a few weeks, but was pleased when the woman working at the bar still recognized me when I came in, asked me where I’d been. This was normal, she’d started recognizing me after I’d been going for a few weeks. What was less normal was that this time, the guy who runs the comedy night also went up to me, and asked if I planned to put my name in the lotto draw, the same type of thing that I did on Monday when my name got picked and I performed. The Monday and Thursday night things both have seven comedians who are booked ahead of time, and then leave open one “lotto spot” that goes to whoever’s name gets pulled from a pitcher.

I said no, because that hadn’t occurred to me, I hadn’t even started to think about how I wanted to try performing again, I’d only come to watch. Then I sat down, thought for five minutes, got back up, and put my name in. Because why not?

My name didn’t end up getting picked, but I enjoyed some of the comedy (not all of it, these nights can be hit and miss, but a few people were good). After it was over, while I was paying my bill, the guy who runs the comedy night came over to me again. He addressed me by my first name, which briefly surprised me because I’d not spoken to him before that night, and I hadn’t realized he knew my name. He said he was sorry I didn’t get picked for the lotto spot, but would I like to perform – as in be on the actual bill, not just in the lotto – on August 10th, in two weeks?

My first thought was genuinely that he’d made some sort of mistake, what with me not being a comedian. I asked him if he was sure, and he said, “Yeah, I saw you at [name of other pub, that runs the Monday night comedy], you were good. So do you want to perform here in two weeks?” I said yes, and thank you, and tried to seem relatively cool about it. Then I left the bar (after briefly apologizing to the guy who had compered the night for how quiet the audience was, including me because to be honest I’d been too distracted by wondering if I’d get picked for the lotto spot to laugh out loud much, but the compere was good and got visibly distressed about how little audience reaction he got, I told him he was funny and deserved a better response, and he told me that made him feel much better and my comment made his night, I’d been nervous to say that to him but then was glad I did, little life tip, if you have nice things to say to people you should say them), and walked home while trying not to shout out loud “I love this fucking city!” as though I was Jim Carry running across town at the end of a movie.

So... it wasn't just people wanting to be nice when they told me on Monday I'd done well. A guy who runs a comedy night thought I did well enough to put me on a bill.

- Last night, I went out for dinner with my best friend, hadn’t eaten in actual restaurant in ages, that was really nice. Hung out at my place afterward. Appreciated how convenient it is to live a fifteen-minute walk from a guy I’ve known for twenty years and still want to see all the time.

- Today, Saturday, I’m about to drive to Montreal to see Tom Ballard and Josie Long, two of my favourite comedians, in a fairly small room at the Just For Laughs Festival. I am so fucking excited. Beyond fucking excited. I am not even going to try to explain how excited I am, because I won’t do it justice. I’ve written a couple of posts about it already. I can barely even think about it. I still can hardly wrap my mind around the idea that Josie Long is a real person and will be in a room with me, even though I’ve been sent pictures she’s put on social media of herself since she arrived in Canada earlier this week.

- Tomorrow, I am being sent to the seaside for my health. I fly out to my grandparents’ home on Canada’s East Coast, my favourite place in the world (Canada’s East Coast in general is a place I love, but my grandparents’ house, out in rural Nova Scotia and right on the ocean, where they’ve been living since I was two years old and where I’ve spent a lot of time every year of my life, is my actual favourite place in the world). My parents have been there for a couple of months now (that’s how they went out to the folk festival that I had to miss due to not being in the area), and I’ll be joining them for a week, and then we’ll all drive home next weekend, and I start a new job on August 8th.

My grandparents won’t be there – they moved into a care home a while ago, and my parents love that house so much and have been trying to figure out a way to keep it in the family, but it doesn’t look like it’s going to work. So part of why they went down this summer was to look into the process of selling it. They did do that a bit, and nothing’s happening immediately, but there’s a good chance this week will be the last time I’ll ever go there. I hope it won’t be. Selling it might take a long time and I might get there again. Or it might sell immediately because it’s the best place in the world.

Either way, I’m going to enjoy this time there. I feel really lucky to have had all the time with it that I’ve had for thirty years, and I feel lucky to get to see it again next week.

So, that's my life update. Things have been rather rough for a while, but they're really looking up. Not everything's sorted out yet, but to paraphrase 30 Rock's Liz Lemon, I am hesitantly allowing myself to feel slightly hopeful.