#i literally only didn’t post bc i was too tired to draw lmao

[mickeywabbit]

full of soup and very tired🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️

[ipatrichor]

c!wilbur? for teh ask game. if he's already been done than c!tubbo?

c!wilbur it is ^^

favorite thing about them

the mental illness /j no but actually my favorite thing is how much he cares. like... he has this incredibly warped perception of himself, but he cares soso much about everyone else that he tears himself apart for them and convinces himself it’s what they want/what he deserves :’ he’s given up everything for his friends time and again, and even when he self-destructed a large part of it was because he thought it was what was best for them i’m going to scream

least favorite thing about them

ok this is gonna sound weird but i don’t have very many disliked things abt him so,, i guess the nsfw jokes? idk, i’m ace and closer to sex-repulsed on the spectrum so rlly it’s just a personal thing that makes me a little uncomfortable sometimes jkgbfh :’ like just saying ‘kinky’ or w/e i literally don’t care abt, i’ve made those jokes, but when it gets to like borderline roleplaying something sexual i get uncomfortable :’’

favorite line

i’m not gonna be able to explain this one very well but the one that hasn’t left my head is something along the lines of “i know what i’m like. that’s the problem” because. fuck, dude. yeah. if i said i don’t feel that on a personal level, i’d be a fuckin liar :’’

brOTP

crimeboys. there are a lot of duos w wilbur i greatly enjoy (tubbo, niki, techno, fundy, phil, etc), but nothing will ever hold a candle in my heart to crimeboys

OTP

none really. idk why, like if it’s because of how much i relate to/project on him or something, but i just don’t see him in a romantic relationship :’ like i’ll write him post-sally, sure, but not really in a relationship

nOTP

any of the minors, full stop. i’ve Seen Things when i don’t filter ao3 tags carefully enough, and i hope to never see anything of the sort again. other than the obvious, i guess... any? like sally is canon and i don’t rlly mind that bc it’s a past relationship, but again i don’t really like shipping c!wilbur and idk why :’ it’s just not my thing lmao

random headcanon

i think he stims a lot. like, he probably masked a fair amount the first time he was alive, but even so he never really sat Still until sometime during potopia. he’d always be like. flicking his wrists, or holding his arms a certain way, or messing with his hair. during pogtopia i think it was a combination of masking bc he was desperate to be ‘taken seriously’ and him not having the energy to stim very much anymore (it’s canon he didn’t eat much and malnutrition is a bitch). so, i think it varied wildly between bursts of stimming and complete stillness, much like his mental state varied between high and low energy. and then after revival, i think he stops caring about masking so much and just goes fuckin wild (as he should)

unpopular opinion

idk how unpopular it is,, but i really hate the zombie wilbur stuff people have been doing since his revival. like, it rarely comes with a body horror tag, and even on stuff done by sympathizers there are still these massive stitches and patches of rotting flesh and it’s just so uncomfortable both to look at and because it’s only ever wilbur. like, tommy was revived too, but people don’t draw him as a Stinky Gross Rotting Zombie Man- no, it’s just wilbur. like, the implications are just. not good once you actually think about them, and it seems to have become part of the most popular/widely accepted fanon design which means i can’t avoid it bc people don’t even tag it or anything. idk it just feels like yet another unintentional dig at mental illness, and i’m just genuinely so tired

song i associate with them

there are. so many. i’m just gonna go thru my c!wilbur playlist and pull out a couple that rlly resonate ok :’’ a terrible ride from lizard boy, villains pt 1 by emma blackery, the village by wrabel, dancing after death by matt maeson, it’s called: freefall by rainbow kitten surprise, burned out by dodie, and liar by the arcadian wild ^^

favorite picture of them

i was abt to say i don’t have one but ykw i actually do- it’s this art piece my friend wil @gremling4mer drew for a fanfic i wrote. i still have it as my lockscreen, and the sheer cozy vibes + it being a gift from a friend have it ranked firmly as my favorite picture of c!wilbur ever :}

[neon-junkie]

unpopular opinion: Micah is terrible but he shows instances of having real, human emotions and completely erasing those moments to paint him as a 100% monster is a disservice for the fandom.

arrrrkajslkfjdsglk okay I'm gonna break Micah down and explain why I like him, just bc of everything going on and cause you've summed that up perfectly. Let's make one thing clear - I don't stan his actions, I never have, I never will. A lot of ppl seem to keep ignoring that lmfao. AND we all know that Micah is a fucking piece of shit. He's the devil. We know. Like the list goes on and on and on when it comes down to why Micah's garbage, but I guarantee you, there is NOBODY out there who actually *stans* him. He's a villain and damn good one. Now. Relating to what you've said, this man has just as much emotion as everybody else. I think the people who view him as an emotionless monster have either never seen ANY camp interactions with him, or they just choose to ignore them. For whatever reason. Idk. It is VERY obvious that Micah has 100% been abused by his father, probably physically as well as mentally and emotionally. He openly talks about the monster that his father is, and he KNOWS that he is just like his father. Now, Amos (his bro), on the other hand, has managed to break away from that lifestyle, straighten his ways, and settled down. Micah is so obviously jealous and even takes the time to write to his brother, probably to try and rekindle their sibling friendship or whatever you wanna call it. Amos basically goes 'NO' and slaps that idea right out of Micah's head, so I do feel bad that Micah was rejected. Amos makes it clear that he will only rekindle that if Micah changes, but he doubts Micah is able to change. So now his only 'role models' are gone - his father and Amos - Micah has nothing left to lose. He has no family, friends that encourage his chaos rather than help fix him, and no partner. He's a loose cannon, and without guidance, Micah will only continue to fire. That's why he sucks up to Dutch so much, because he STILL needs acceptance, praise, and guidance, and Dutch gives him all of that. Yeah, it's creepy to see, but that man must be dying inside if he'll literally lick Dutch's shoes just for a bit of acceptance. Micah clearly does try, like his approach to making friends is so cringe, but he's clearly never ever done this before, and he's only following the ways his father taught him. I mean, we see him still try to befriend Arthur at the start of the game, but Arthur barely looks at him and just continues to shoot him down. I know Arthur is probably following his gut, but people can't say that Micah didn't try. And we see him try it on with the women of the camp, he's clearly desperate to at least find a partner, and probably secretly jealous that his brother has that and a family. And if his brother can do it, then maybe he can too? and we do see him try. But Micah's no rapist, and it makes me cringe when ppl say that. There's a good post about it (here) that I won't go into detail, u can just read that for urself. So - Micah has nothing to lose. The camp doesn't want him there, so it's no sweat off his nose if he rats them out. Obviously, I don't agree with it and I think Micah should have just left, but then that'd be a very boring game lmfao.  There's nobody stopping him from causing chaos, and he's just going to continue to do what he was taught to do - be a fucking piece of shit. But to say he has no emotions? You sure about that? It's SO obvious that Micah still craves acceptance in any form, whether it's from a friend, a partner, his mentor, etc. He NEEDS acceptance and he seems very lost without it. And it's so clear that Micahs past trauma still controls his actions, and he clearly has no idea how to even begin accepting and moving past his trauma. That man just needs a therapist asap. Peter Blomquist said it himself, that Micah is essentially just misunderstood. (here) And well, if his own actors said that then why the hell do people continue to ignore it? Because they just want to hate Micah. They view him as an evil and racist piece of shit and just want to hate that, which everybody does cause yanno, it's bad. But they continue to ignore that Micah, like Bill, suffers from a lot of mental trauma and issues, and his past has resulted in the person that he is today. I’ll say this AGAIN, I’m not condoning his actions, far from it, I’ve said many times before that Micah is fucking garbage, we just find him interesting. Honestly, I think if the gang was accepting, or if Micah had someone to shove him in the right direction, then he would have redeemed himself and fixed his ways. Things like racism are taught, and if you can teach it, then you can unteach it, just like Bill begins to learn. Micah is a villain and that's why I like him. Again, I don't support or stan his actions, but it's just so refreshing to see someone so chaotic and loose. People saying that you shouldn't like Micah because he's racist, also choose to ignore the fact that Abigails abusive, so why do y'all still stan her when we see the way she speaks to John? or the way she physically abuses him? So abuse is fine but racism isn't? hmm.  But if we shouldn't like Micah because he's bad then why the hell do we like characters like Darth Vader or all the fucking Disney villains? Have you seen how much merch those criminals have? But a bunch of strangers on the internet having a wank over the ratman is bad? We're allowed to enjoy those but not Micah? big sigh. Peter also said that there's nothing wrong with liking Micah. You're allowed to enjoy villains, it's not a fucking crime, and it doesn't mean you support their actions, it never has done.

PLUS, this is a game full of mass murderers?!?! Arthur does a LOT that is considered questionable, such as beating a terminally ill man into his grave, but people choose to draw the line at Micah. You’re free to enjoy whatever fiction you want, but there’s no line you can draw. Well, you can draw a line for yourself, but you can’t rule what others can and cannot enjoy.

It's just SO tiring (personally) to constantly see happy endings and pure, wholesome, golden characters. I'm a sucker for bad guys and seeing them win, so when I played RDR I was like 'oh yeah, this is what I need' and that's probably why Micah's my fave lmao. It's so refreshing to see, and there's nothing wrong with enjoying it. Some people just enjoy villains, big whoop. We need to stop expecting characters to be pure cause that's just so unrealistic. Everybody has flaws of all different kinds, and that's what makes these characters human. Like, are we just choosing to ignore the fact that Arthur is the most wanted out of the gang, who has probably murdered the most people? Do we just wanna sweep his kill count under the rug and choose to hate Micah based on the one fact of him being racist? The whole fucking gang are outlaws, they're all essentially villains, even the babies like Kieran!! Micah is just as complex as every other character in this stinky game, and people who refuse to acknowledge his layers and just portray him as a monster are whack as shit. And remember, those who tell you what you can and can't enjoy are just as bad as Micah Bell himself. Especially the ones who abuse you over FICTION.

[jcfoxington]

@sambambucky​ : “pls... Pastels, Peaches and Pain??? among us first draft??? marvel meets warframe meets a bunch of tumblr posts (it’s not an au!?!??!)

hi jo !!! Pastels, Peaches, and Pain is one of those sambucky wips i have mostly fully fleshed out in my head because of one (1) extreme moment of clarity after a rogue ‘what if’ tangent thought but havent written anything of yet out of restraint / knowing i need to finish at least one of my current sambucky wips before i start it or none of them will get done

this was the rogue tangent thought: “what if Sam is haunted by Figaro’s ghost and has been since he was a kid?”. i’ve changed the ghost cat to not be Figaro but that’s the premise !

i refer to the fic as the cat fic ‘cause the whole plot is based around sam’s ghost cat companion insisting he adopts nat’s cat Liho after endgame and then Figaro later and then [insert redacted because plot spoilers but just know it relates to Alpine]. no im not projecting my feelings about cats idk what youre talking about 

here’s some note snippets just for you:

the cat, inexplicably, takes a liking to bucky, which is really annoying bc sam doesnt know how to explain to him that all the oddly soft gusts of wind are actually sam's dead cat insisting on getting pats

bucky getting shade thrown at him by said ghost cat during all of tfatws + them making up (and not out. yet)

starts when sam's a kid & follows him as he grows up w/ a ghost kitty as a companion only he can see & interact with + angst with an undertone of comedy + getting together

he whispers to ghost kitty, who simply mmrrs happily

for the among us first draft thing, what basically happened is i saw this tweet and this video and my brain latched onto these dynamics so hard i had to write about them. 

here’s a sketch of my two main imposters, Black (left) and Cyan (right):

and here’s a snippet:

The thing having Cyan pause and stare out at the asteroid field is how the colors stretch to family. When they and Black came aboard, they had thought every crewmember was an adult working on the planet-change project. That the patch of off-white with a black something-pattern-or-shape signified status. In a way, Cyan supposes it does, but just not the way they expected. They had expected it to show what rank an individual held within the hierarchy of the crew, from deckhand to division leader to captain, not to show that you're family of the crew and not actually part of the crew itself. 

There are innocents on this ship. Children. It was not something any of them had anticipated, and not something Cyan had been prepared to deal with. They and Black boarded this horrible place to eradicate a threat, believing each and single one of the humans were accomplishes and dedicated to the goal of destroying Cyan and Black's species, and their planet. But, now?

marvel meets warframe meets a bunch of tumblr posts... doesn’t have a wip title or seperate document for itself yet cause it’s been stuck in my ‘story ideas’ document since its creation. so ‘marvel meets warframe meets a bunch of tumblr posts’ is literally just me describing the vibe of an original world gjkerfkds

the world came to be for two reasons. firstly, i want to do make take on a superhero universe because the plot and complete lack of communication in both the dcu and mcu piss me the fuck off. secondly, needed a place to dump ocs with elaborate backstories or fantasy / sci-fi abilities that dont fit into any of my existing worlds

which sounds super competent but trust me, it isn’t. it didn’t gain any solidity at all until i decided to do a personal ‘how different can i make spn castiel look & still retain the same vibe?’ challenge. i have my own cas now

however, the reason i said ‘marvel meets...’ is because i’ve snagged a couple of different things from the mcu, most notably: enemies to reluctant coworkers to lovers, yes our best friend have the same name. no they’re not the same person, secret evil org is controlling the government, and the assassin that tried to kill you several times is now your best friend

warframe was added to the world because i got attached to my Volt build, gave them a name, and have some headcanons idk what to do with because i refuse to interact with that fandom. also because the friend i made through discussing warframe lore + plot dicked me over so it feels Bad to create for

the glue to this whole mess is that one “in every friend group there’s a mean bisexual, an even meaner lesbian, a she/they, a he/they, a himbo, an astrology bitch, a short king, and a token straight” tumblr post. my main group of superheroes ala the avengers consist of these people. the token straight is the only one i havent figured out who is yet

ever since i figured that out ive been throwing story / character ideas and weirdly specific aesthetics from popular tumblr posts into this world’s notes. here’s some examples:

sword grandmas

that trope where someone’s really nice and acts super well-adjusted to society but then they do something super whack and dangerous and you realize ‘oh they’re secretly a little bit insane, actually’

anti-gay group’s leader’s wife leaves him for another woman

superhero who swore to be the best hero [city / planet / solar system / continent / ????] has ever seen ever since he lost his wife. not because she’s dead but divorce just sucks & the hero-to-be is terrible at coping

dishevelled swamp witch

that one person who runs around with an amulet all the time & isn’t aware it’s cursed

an exasperated, tired superhuman assassin running after their husband and their husband's best friend. their husband and said husband's best friend both have wings. chaos ensues (yes, this one is a sambucky post)

ask me about my WIPs!

BONUS:

@sambambucky​​ : #i want to have a coffee and listen to synopses of all of these.... #i miss the discord wow #WRITING TAG #waitttt time jumping dream movie? lmao I'VE READ THIS LIST FORTY TIMES and every time i rediscover something i wanna know about #outfit doodlesss ugh i need to go

couldnt not respond to your tags because they make me go ghrkjfnerknf but in the good way. we miss you too jo !!

the time jumping dream movie was one of the first vivid dreams i had and the whole thing was so stupidly coherent and whacky i had to write it down. it grew plot, a queer love dynamic, weird sci-fi apocalypse elements, anti-military propaganda, questionable science, and a sequel while i wasnt looking and now i just. have to make it a real movie or i’ll combust

outfit djoodlles.png is only on there because my best friend sent me a ‘draw this outfit’ meme and space kitty, my current character brainrot, stole all the outfits for himself. otherwise, that file just sits there until im feeling like designing an outfit or wanna see how a stupid thing looks on my oc patrick

here’s one of the two poses-to-doodle-outfits-on of space kitty ive made so far:

and here’s one of those stupid things on patrick (that then turned into an actual outfit of his because i have no self control):

[piduai]

this has been on my mind for a while, i feel like at this point women mangaka are generally just better people than their male peers. id love to hear some manga ud recommend by women, or even counterpoints, but series like Dungeon Meshi and Full Metal Alchemist (among others) handle almost every concept way better and with more tact, from writing complex stories and compelling characters, to treating women like people and not literal naked rubber dolls colored in and posed like p*rn

you are so correct and right and speak the truth. female mangaka are superior. the only thing i’d say women don’t do inherently better is technical skill, there’s a ton of men who are very artistically talented, but arts such as drawing and music are sexless because they come from within and aren’t influenced by external factors such as upbringing and culture like storytelling is. everything else though is done better by women.

the problem with female mangaka is that they’re gatekept in the industry big time. if you google ‘top selling manga of all time’ and go to the wikipedia page, there’s only one woman (kimetsu no yaiba) and she’s hiding behind a male pen name just like arakawa hiromi did when fma was publishing. neither of these are a coincidence. women are generally discouraged from pursuing writing, and if they do so they’re supposed to be kept to female-catering genres such as shoujo, josei and BL, which are all much less mainstream, aka much less known and much less money making, than shounen. women having to go behind male-sounding pen names just so men don’t feel emasculated when consuming their stories has been a thing since forever across many different cultures. misogyny is universal.

however since i personally am more into grittier stuff and i love gratuitous violence and other Mature Themes i just naturally gravitate more towards manime with all its faults. my favorite genre overall is comedy though and women ARE much funnier and wittier and more clever. female mangaka also typically avoid drawing gore, which i guess is cultural but a shame.

i’m not a manga person, i prefer watching anime, so i compiled a list of my favorite anime based on manga written by women a while ago. i am VERY picky and nitpicky and very, very difficult to please so keep in mind that the list is not comprehensive in the slightest, it’s just things that i personally liked. there’s tons of non-shoujo stuff written by women that generally have a good reputation (ao no exorcist, gangsta, kuroshitsuji, noragami, d gray man, magi, xxxholic etc etc etc) that didn’t stand out to me at all so again, short as it may be the list isn’t comprehensive in the slightest, i’m sure that people who are more easily entertained than me could come up with much more names. anyway everything else is copy-pasted, i know you know of fmab but it needs to be included because fmab is my favorite series of all times:

anime based on manga created by female writers that is in fact not heterosexual shoujo/BL garbage and i liked (bc i saw a post talking about female mangakas and all of the examples were in fact heterosexual shoujo/BL garbage that i unfortunately do not like and my anime opinions are super important obviously):

fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood (adventure/action) any comments on why fmab is the best product the anime industry has ever put on the market that will not be outranked ever is tired at this point. fmab is a masterpiece through and through. most of the cast including the mcs is male tho, which is sad

saraiya goyou (historical/drama) if fmab didn’t exist it would have been the best title out there. the word masterpiece was invented solely to have a concept to describe it. the ost makes up about 40% of its greatness and was also written by a woman. too bad all the characters are also dudes

acca: 13ku kansatsuka (drama/political) not quite as good as saraiya goyou but from ono natsume as well. pleasant is the word to describe it. relaxing. most of the cast is male.

dorohedoro (horror/gore/comedy) the best title since like 2006. everything about it is great. i don’t have a single criticism and that’s rare. the cast is actually balanced and the Female Characters™ all 3 of them are like, written like people and are also queens

hachimitsu to clover (slice of life) saddest shit i’ve seen in my whole life in a colorful packaging. heterosexual as hell but not in an obnoxious way. cast seems diverse but it’s predominantly male

3gatsu no lion (drama) from the same great umino chica who is a master at writing uncomfortable truths and playing on emotions. she’s great truly, her character crafting is genuine but it gets under your skin, it’s filled with melancholy. 3gatsu is actually better than hachimitsu to clover but 1) i have history with the former so i like it better and 2) it was produced by shaft which is a sin in itself. they did a great job and all, i just hate the studio. has 3 speaking female characters in total but all 3 are great.

hoozuki no reitetsu (comedy) it’s hilarious it’s fresh it’s pretty it’s original it’s creative it’s clever. i love everything about it. the whole cast is male with like 2 exceptions and a rabbit (best girl).

saiunkoku monogatari (historical) i know it LOOKS like heterosexual shoujo garbage but it in fact isn’t. fits the reverse harem trope solely because everyone is in love with mc, but there’s next to no actual romance in it. unironically a feminist power fantasy. i’m still shooketh at how incredibly pleasant it turned out to be. the mc is a young girl but the rest of the cast is almost exclusively male.

arakawa under the bridge (comedy) surprisingly… by shaft again. maybe i am prejudiced. anyway, hilarious to a fault. is technically centered around a str8 romance but it’s not too invasive so whatever. cast is pretty balanced and the women are written smartly.

saint oniisan (comedy) THE funniest thing i’ve ever watched, or nearly. it’s just great. same author as above. cast exclusively male

doukyuusei (gay romance) which i refuse to categorize as BL simply because it’s not BL. it’s a good gay story, arguably the best one yet. cast is exclusively male but i mean lmao

gekkan shoujo nozaki-kun (comedy) straight to A FAULT but funny nevertheless. is, technically, heterosexual shoujo garbage. but SOME heterosexual shoujo garbage can stay i guess. cast is balanced, there’s still more male characters tho

gokusen (comedy/action) which i don’t remember much about except kumiko being best girl and me liking it. if i remember liking it it means it was good overall just not memorable. cast is exclusively male except mc.

kaleido star (sports) which is the ONLY good, or like decent, or like watchable sports anime, the rest don’t exist. not based on a manga but the writer is a woman which is strongly felt through and through. good story about perseverance and will and optimism and competition. cast is predominantly female and all of them are wonderfully written

michiko to hatchin (adventure) again no manga but main writer is the woman known for creating the skating BL people pretend isn’t BL. michiko to hatchin is way better than the skating BL, but i’m just a humble girl. tons of sexy sexy i could have lived without but otherwise good shit. cast predominantly female.

mushishi (mystery/fantasy) mushishi is just unique. it has similar vibes to saraiya goyou and natsume sure, but ultimately it’s one of its kind. it has what ghibli wants. again no criticism about it at all except that it’s SO chill that binging it is super tiring. cast is predominantly male but it has few reoccurring characters so who cares.

natsume yuujinchou (mystery/fantasy) again similar to mushishi but less grim. chill story, the definition of wholesome unproblematic etc whatever kids are into these days. cast predominantly male but not memorable in the slightest

petshop of horrors (horror) watched it a million years ago so don’t remember shit but i do remember liking it. cast is probably predominantly male

sakamoto desu ga (comedy) well THE actual funniest thing i’ve ever watched, it licherally had me in tears, i watched the new episodes like 3 times on the days they came out, including watching them on tv in real time at like 3 am or whenever it aired in shinya. just really really funny. cast predominantly male.

[red-i-mean-blue]

A:TLA romantic ships part 1

yes, no one asked for my opinions, yes I will give them anyway, yes because I have decided making a bunch of meaningless decisions and arguing for them will improve my mental state, yes I watched the show all in one very sleep deprived go and i’m not interested in rewatching it so yes I have absolutely no sources, yes this is a really long grammatical nightmare because I don’ t know how to be succinct and i use way more words than necessary at any opportunity because if my point doesn’ t come across exactly like i intend it will greatly upset me, no I have not yet watched Korra or read the comics because i’m tired now let’s do this.

includes Kataang, Zutara, Jetkara, Jinko, Maiko, Sukka, Taang, Tokka, Toko Ty Lokka, Tyzula, Yukka bc these were on the Avatar wiki ship list, part two will go into gay ships more

from 0 I despise people who ship this immediately to 10 I will read absolutely anything with this, I love it and could draw it for hours on how much I think the relationship would be good and how happy it makes me

Kataang (looks like a comic book sound effect so plus points)

very clearly built up over the series

cute kid crushes also ngl did not know katara was 14 and not older 12 or 13 so didn’t care about age when watching

now I know she’s 14 and he’s 12 it’s a little weird but still

haters say katara was just the avatar’s trophy girl, as if aang didnt kiss the ground she walked on and wouldnt stop telling anyone how amazing she is. Katara was the first face he saw from the new world and they immediately became friends. she was so excited to meet another bender, he clearly is trying to impress her and it is working, he listens to her about bending and offers to take her to the other side of the world to master water, TELL ME at this moment she is not ride or die and she doesn’t even know he’s the avatar, he lets her feel like a kid again, which is a feeling she’s forgotten after years of being a mother to sokka and the children. he literally sweeps her off her feet to save her from the fire nations ship i-. rewatched boy in the iceberg and hoo boy had canon not messed it up, this ship could have been legendary

hard to imagine older them working out what with the whole last airbender, preserve air nomad culture, let’s travel the world bc nomadic lifestyle, what’s marriage i’m a monk without biological family values vs last southern waterbender, preserve southern water tribe culture, I believe in the power of family and am ridiculously dedicated to my tribe,  let me go home to my father and tribe shtick, but I don’t care for after the show finishes much except for following the gang fix the world so I don’t really care about the marriage issue

canon was good until that Mess in season 3, WHY did he kiss her after that speech, wish they talked that out properly, wish he learned letting go of her to open the 7th chakra was the only right decision, wish the ending was a little more vague in ships and just left things open but yk whatever

that finale kiss was sweet, they hugged foremost as friends, no blushing, and then got the fuzzies, that moment standing alone? a+ but without any talking about what happened on ember island, a little unsatisfying

overall, fine ship, not my favourite nor do I actively ship it, but I see a kataang moment, i’m like, sweet so I give it a 6

Zutara (apparently fans are zutarians which looks like an alien race, plus points)

latter half of the show had quite a lot of Zutara potential, but idk about Zutara actual

katara was so ready to drop his ass, no way at the start

there is only one dynamic between them in which I can see Zutara working and that is as in the Stalking Zuko by emletish series where katara is so distrusting over zuko she takes to stalking him to make sure he isn’t doing anything to hurt Aang or about to betray them (her) again but he is just such a sweet dork who keeps trying to apologise to her even while she’s apologising to him for being a bitch that she can’t help but start to trust him, i’m a third into the third book in the series not stalking firelord zuko and I am thriving and tbh this is the only situation where I accept zutara, read the series I love it

age gap is weird, I know it’s the same difference between kataang but they made a point of zuko being older in the show also he’s so much taller and I don’t like 16 year old boys with 14 year old girlfriends in real life and so would katara because jet

katara has a bad experience with bad boy sword weilders (jet) but I guess you could see it as the start of her type idk

they are both the moms of the Gaang. sokka is the fun dad.

there is a parallel between their families, with the leader of their people dad, mom who left the picture when they were young, an older brother who is not a prodigy at/can’ t bend their respective element so they become proficient at swords instead, prodigy at bending younger sister with a violent streak. this is why I see zutara as potentially a really close friendship, almost siblings, but not a romance because to me katara is a little too like azula for comfort...

tbh I think a lot of folk shipped it because ooh fire boy and water girl (not the game) that’ s perfect, and bam army of zutarians

overall, kind of weird but ok and good grounds for humour so I give it a 4

Jetkara (bad ship name, why would you like this, minus points)

Jet is bad. yes Katara really liked him, yes he was definitely her first kiss and she would definitely consider him her first boyfriend but they would not define it because it’s easier to manipulate someone when it’s unclear what your relationship is and Jet is bad, with his weird fricking eyebrows and not even real swords those hook swords

Not wasting my time, 2

Jinko (cool name, reminds me of Hong Jinkyung, plus points) 

short but so sweet. not the first thing people remember from watching the tales of ba sing se (brb going to rewatch and cry) but really cute, so here’s a running commentary

his first thought was she knew they were fire nation rather than a pretty girl sat in a teashop giving him looks because she had a crush omg

that honest surprise when his uncle suggested she liked her and then she walked up and asked him on a date, adorable

anyone who looked at that god-awful hairstyle and still thought he looked cute has it bad also aww that hair ruffle and the little grab onto his arm

he’s pushing his food around and she’s trying out ice breaker questions and recieving one word responses he has no idea what he’s doing

“she is not my GIRLFRIEND” he’s not over Mai, clearly but he still is trying his best to be a good date even if he’s terrible at making conversation

anyone who sat through that date and the bad lying and the stilted conversation and still thought he was cute has it bad 

he is So Bad At Lying he just told the truth very vaguely and then bam travelling circus

jin so knows the two are fire nation, the whole date she just politely ignores the clear lies and doesn’t react to the obvious firebending, what an icon we love jin

honestly I was really expecting the show to reveal that jin knew he was a firebender if not from the start then from the lights but eh I guess she can keep a secret, good for her

HE KISSED HER BACK BEFORE REALISING A RELATIONSHIP COULD NEVER GO WELL AND HE MAY HAVE ANGSTILY STORMED OFF BUT HE ADMITTED IT WAS A NICE TIME TO HIS UNCLE

that being said I can’t see anything more happening but this date but omg imagine fire lord zuko coming back to visit and they become friends I-

overwhelming support for pre-date jin flirting to an oblivious zuko and the date Jinko, 8

Maiko (name would be a good name for a cat idk why)

childhood sweethearts before the banishment i think

she crushed because he saved her hair from getting burnt by tackling her into a fountain? adorable

I love mai she’s so funny but I think not the best match for zuko? he has a lot of trauma to get over and she doesn’t seem like the let all your feelings out and let’s talk about it until you feel better kind of person.  it was deeply ingrained in her to keep all of her feelings and emotions strongly hidden because she got what she wanted from her politician parents so long as she was quiet, well-mannered, and perfectly behaved according to avatar wiki so I get why she’s that way, until I was 11 I was that way too all the time, I understand freezing your face so you don’t look afraid or upset or angry and risk annoying adults, but I don’t think that that would fit zuko with his social ineptness

they literally broke up twice but are just assumed back together? she just surprised him and said they were back together and I think he forgot she existed

the deadpan firelady and the fire lord would be hilarious together tho she got the ruthlessness he lacks

post coronation I can see it happening, 6 but under Kataang

Sukka (terrible name lmao)

the cutest, sokka very excitedly says “Suki!! :DDD” every time he sees her

she didn’t give him the time of day until HE changed, incredible

just the best canon ship, the two nonbenders in the Gaang but very clearly shown to be important key members.

suki is sneaky and badass, rivalling zuko for position on the team as the sneaky badass one (they tie and bond over being sneaky and badass)

sokka is a great dad, he is the dad of the Gaang and he clearly loves suki and suki loves him back

sokka ships are ELITE, 9

Taang (a delicious orange drink mix that reminds me of home, nostalgia)

foreshadowing from the swamp where someone aang loved in the future really made me think taang was endgame yk

opposite elements ideology that I guess is what zutarians like also leaves everyone in the gang dating a Gaang member if zutara happens

actually the same age but not much else going for it

best friends, 4 but under Zutara

Tokka (great name of a small pet fight me)

sokka ships are elite, childhood crush turned adult strong friendship

I really like seeing the rough, tough, greatest earthbender in  the world have a crush, adorable

sokka is a great friend and his and toph’s canon relationship is so sweet, I wouldn’t change it

toph was fully going to give sokka a kiss on the cheek for saving her life i’m melting

age difference is too weird for a romance he’s like 16 or 17 by the end I think and she’s 12

best friends, 10 as a relationship in the show, 2, but in their 20s after the show... 4 but under Taang

Toko (very forgettable name but both characters have 4 letters so I guess it’s hard to come up with something memorable but every time I read it as Toph because same shape ish so minus points for being annoying)

even weirder age gap than Tokka 

not many moments that could be considered romantic? 

toph first accepted zuko despite him burning her feet, how she sees, which was big and they resolved problems between them quickly

toph clinging to his arm and asking for a life changing field trip caused him to blush, but I see that as him being like oh someone wants to spend time with me?? she’s hugging me??? what is this 

convenient ship for kataangers because the Gaang could be paired off as Kataang, Sukka, Toko

her crush on sokka seemed to go away or calm down when he showed up and she punched him and teased him a lot, her way of bonding

similar strict teaching styles and bonding over secret identities as Blue Spirit and Blind Bandit and parental issues and being the children of important families who made them run away to enjoy not having anything to do with politics and being nobility with impaired vision who have never stepped into a kitchen in their lives and being used to servants and then being on the run

I really see them as siblings with her helping him relax from his duties as fire lord because you already know this boy’s sense of honour is going to make him work tirelessly to fix the world and him helping her relax from the whole i’m not a fragile, weak little blind girl, i’m the greatest earthbender in the world shtick and reminding her she can be both a blind 12 year old girl and the most powerful earthbender in the world, she can accept help without being weak or lesser than anyone, people want to help because they care not that they pity you

best friends 10, relationship in show 1, after show 3

Ty Lokka (I don’t like this name looks like a place but can think of nothing better)

yeah I guess ty lee’s obvious flirting is grounds for a ship but in every interaction he’s involved with someone else and doesn’t seem to like her as a person

do they even interact while on the same side?

friendly aquaintances at best, don’ t understand, 2 but above Jetkara

Tyzula (don’t like this name, like a mineral water?)

canon I don’t care it is canonically a possessive relationship

azula’s only genuine apology goes to ty lee after hurting her feelings

Azula clearly loves ty lee, her betrayal sends her mad

after a lot of therapy for azula and apologies, maybe a healthy relationship could form after the show, 8 above Jinko

Yukka (looks like a childish insult, surely someone could have thought of a better name)

Sokka’s love for Yue stays with him for the rest of his life, she was the first person to die in front of him and he sees the moon as her facing the earth

love this forbidden lovers content, sokka ships stay elite

Sokka and Yue spend as much time together as possible with secret midnight dates flirting (“you wanna do an...activity together?”)  Sokka’s reaction to Yue’s engagement shows that he wants to have a serious relationship with her, and also he thinks Hahn is a bad person for Yue, which he is. 

Yue dying devastated him and he never falls out of love with Yue. her last words “[she] will always be with him” are true. swamp visions show Yue as one of the most important people in his life like a season or so after he last saw her. he wouldn’t kiss suki in front of the moon, and cries when Yue appears on stage, ignoring Suki. he talks about the moon as if it is directly Princess Yue in that cactus juice scene.

she died in his arms oh my god don’t look i crying, he feels personally responsible and guilty

yue was great even though she was the indigenous or black girl with light hair and eyes character and I wish she could have helped aang in the spirit world 

despite her arranged engagement she clearly really likes sokka even though she knows nothing can happen, 9

Kataang, Zutara, Jetkara, Jinko, Maiko, Sukka, Taang, Tokka, Toko, Ty Lokka, Tyzula, Yukka

[peachywander]

All asks

Holy shit, this will be so much fun B-) *cracks knuckles*

Ask me: FANDOM EDITION

A - Your current OTP

Uhhh pff,,, skeleton dance I think?? I mean sure, skelley dance is always my current OTP, ngl. They're basically made for eachother, hell, even craig himself wore tshirts and stuff with wander hugging hater ifthisisn'tcannonthenidkwhatitis

B - A pairing you initially didn’t consider but someone changed your mind

To be honest,, wander x beza. I used to dislike every wander x girl ship bcs I see him as gae and nothing else. But I have a friend who does lots of art with them so I think it grew on me more and more with time?? Now I think they would look cute together, even if i'm still not super big on it.

C - A pairing you have never liked and probably never will

Wnder x domi. No comment, I despise it with all my heart 😂😂 Like I said earlier, I don't like most of wander x girl ships, and domi really hates wander. Sooo this ship simply doesn't make sense to me,, lmfao.

D - A pairing you wish you liked but just can’t

I think Twi x Flash from mlp. Yeah, I thought twi was cute when crushing on him in the 1st EG movie but they don't seem to have that chemistry I was hoping for. Plus I haven't seen any recent episodes of mlp in a long time, though I heard ppl say that he was mean to her once, if I remember well? Anyways, doesn't work so much for me.

E - Have you added anything stupid/cracky/hilarious to your fandom, if so, what

Besides memes/ shitposts, not really. Check @gunxball if you want to see posts of mine back when I was into gumball 2 yrs ago (golly i miss those times)

F - What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom

Probably su (2016-2019) or kid vs kat (2011-2014)

G - Do you remember your first OTP, if so who was in it

Why yes, of course I do. cosmo x wanda from fop. They were so adorbs together esp in the first 2 seasons. Don't like how they got so flanderized with time, their dynamic was absolutely destroyed, and my day was ruined when I found out.

H - Do you prefer characters from real action series or anime series

I don't watch either lolol

But I think anime.

I - Has tumblr caused you to stop liking any fandoms, if so, which and why

Dislike the fandom, not the show itself? Probably hzbin hotel. The show has a pretty neat concept and animation and it had such a big impact on my artstyle when I first watched it. But the fandom? Absolute hell. (pun intended)

From shipping wars, to pestering vivz, anything is possible. Glad I haven't actually interacted with that part of the fandom.

J - Name a fandom you didn’t care/think about until you saw it all over tumblr

Not a show but among us. Back in september/october last year, my tl was FILLED with among us, up and down. Made me a lil tired of it but once I tried playing that game, I couldn't stop. Also the owlhouse, fell in love with the artstyle and story.

K - How do you feel about the other people in your current fandom

I don't have a current fandom. Not feeling in the mood + school + inactivity bcs of school. So I'll say abt my latest fandom, which was animaney. Well, people were really nice, and they seemed to enjoy the reboot. Nothing more to say tbh,,

L - Your favorite fanartist/author gives you one request, what do you ask for

Ummm I don't really like giving rqs to my fave artists, i don't wanna bother them haha

M - Your favorite fanart or fanartist

I don't know aaaa, prolly toonipi but she also draws ocs, not just fanart.

N - Your favorite fanfiction or fanauthor

Anything cute or sappy with skelleydance (NO nsfw)

O - Choose a song at random, which OTP does it remind you of

Lasers and feelings. Skellydance again. It matches sO well-

P - Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas)

I used to have a skatepark AU ft. su chars but never put anything over here. I still have the sketches from 9th grade lmao.

Q - A ship you’ve abandoned and why

To be completely honest, Amydot. Up until s3 they really gave me possible ship vibes. They interacted a lot, and peri discovered her metal powers thanks to amy. But after s3 they hardly ever interacted anymore (besides that one ep from s5 with the kindergarden). I was so dissapointed, but hey lapdot isn't so bad anyway, right?

R - A pairing you ship that you don’t think anyone else ships

Back in 2014 I would have said chred from angry birds, definitely. Not many really shipped them, and when I saw some fanart of them on dA everyone would say "ew, gae". Well, 2014 everyone. I was always like "so?? i like that ship, what's the problem??"

S - Show us an example of your personal headcanon

Uhmm, i headcanon darwin from tawog that he likes to yodel lol

T - If you mostly have homoships, do you have any heteroships

I think my ships are 50-50, but here are some examples:

Larsdie

Stevnnie

Blckeye

Fluttrcord

Beeckard

Starc0

Tanyamao

Foxodile

Pennball

Carwin

U - If you mostly have heteroships, do you have any homoships

Same as T. Another examples:

Skelleydance

Wnderingeye

Sylava

Lumty

Rupphre

Pearlmthyst

Badgrmao

Bubbline

Flutterdsh

Patbob

V - Are you one of those fans who can’t watch anything without shipping

Lol no. Tbh, i'm not super big on shipping either. I only slighty like/dislike any ship i listed earlier (with the exception of skelleydance, i'm too in love with that ship)

W - 5 favorite characters from 5 different fandoms

wakko warner (animaney)

wander (woy)

fluttershy (mlp)

amethyst (su)

bubbles (ppg)

X - 3 OTPs from 3 different fandoms

skelleydance (woy)

lumty (toh)

stevnnie (su)

Y - A fandom you’re in but have no ships from

kid cosmic (or maybe I do ship papa g w/ chuck), animaney, okko, gravity flls

Z - Just ramble about something fan-related, go go go

That one fan made episode from su called the smothering, it was so freaking amazing. It helped a lot in relieveing the pain of that big hiatus from 2017 (which was the biggest one, i literally turned into a skeleton waiting for new eps). Loved peri's needy personality, as well as lappy's playful one. It was so well written, like it could be perfectly fit as a role reversal episode in the main show.

[crazycookiemaniac]

Omg why are you losing so many followers youve been drawing gay shit for forever??? (Or maybe i as a gay was just interpreting it that way)

Because I literally spammed people every day for one week lmao. And also, a lot of people follow others for specific content. The moment I stop drawing that exact thing they followed me for, they unfollow me. There are also accounts that follow just to make you follow them & if you don’t, they unfollow you after a while. There’s people who followed me for haikyuu & weren’t interested in BC content, and there were people who followed me for BC content but got showered in gay art instead and that was not their cuppa tea. 

But mostly, i start appearing on people’s feed the more I post. So having me post incessantly for one week made me show up on feeds that I hadn’t shown up for  a good while, so there were probably people who forgot they had followed me in the first place & me posting was a reminder to unfollow.

Truthfully, follower counts are dumb. Yes, it is important for you to have a high follower count for you to get attention, but the amount of people actually following you if you don’t have a consistent art style & rarely ever post something with different vibes than your usual ones, is equal or less than 1% of your total amount of following.

My instagram tells me I have 43k. I do not have 43k people following me. I’ve had 43k that once saw my account & pressed the follow button, but their feeds are filled up with other people’s accs that interest them more than mine (as well as my own feed does not show all the content of the 200+ something people I follow, unless I scroll down till the depths of hell to find every single post on that day and then do so on the next day as well).

Essentially, 95% of your followers are there because of content. They want to see what entertains them. Most of them don’t care about the artist and don’t interact with them at all. Many of them are scared to, given the high follower count. Social media & big accounts make people forget that there are other, real, living & breathing people that are behind them all.

So, to many, I was just a random artist they found and “lol”ed at one of my comics & pressed follow without thinking about it. Most of them don’t go to my account and see all other art I’ve posted to see if they actually like what I do, or me as a person and as an artist at all.

People who don’t know this get really discouraged when they don’t earn a lot of followers, or when they lose a lot (like I did). And some people think you gotta have hundreds of thousands to be famous. I’ve seen accs going around that paid for ads, that had over 150k followers and less than 1k likes on their posts.

Truly famous, loved, growing and/or steady accounts have an amount of likes per post proportional to their follower count. For example, if someone has 150k followers, most of their posts will vary from 20k to 100k likes.

When I was growing my account because I hopped in the fandom bandwagon and stupid little me didn’t know that would only make me crash later, I had like 20~30k and some of my posts reached more than 20k likes (because people liked my stupid comics). Nowadays, I’m not part of the fandom that made me grow anymore. I’m part of a very underrated one (Black Clover), as well a I am drawing a very underrated ship (LuGna) that above all else is getting hated on. I have everything against me in this, so it’s no wonder I lost so many followers.

They didn’t wanna see gay art. They didn’t wanna see Black Clover. They didn’t even know what the fuck was going on. Not everyone paid attention or kept up with my warnings. Despite me explaining multiple times in multiple posts what the Thunder Flames project was about, a lot of people still didn’t know what I was doing that for.

The thing about being a big follower count is that, unless you’re actually loved for what you do (and to do that, once again, I need to emphasize that you need to keep a steady rhythm, a steady vibe, a steady you. Because people follow you for your first impression on them, and you gotta keep up to that first impression if you wanna keep your followers.

I’m unsteady. One look at my gallery and you’ll see how disorganized everything is. Oh, lookit, a 1 min speedpaint of a random drawing I did on an old piece of paper! And right on the left there’s a stupid random comic I did–on the right there’s this super detailed, shaded drawing I’ve done that actually looks terrible to me and I will 100% archive it later, and then there’s B&W mixed with gray shaded, flat colored and fully shaded characters of different fandoms + OCs from commissions and whatever else. 

The thing is, I made my follower count based on a fandom, and now that I’m not there most of that follower count does not have me on their feed. And most of them do not want me on their feed. Now, I’m trying to build a follower count for who I am as an artist, because the few people who have actually stayed and followed me throughout the years know how inconsistent I am in terms of art style, fandoms and everything else.

A solution to this would me either keep creating/posting the same thing all over again (just in different patterns), or creating original content (which I do plan on doing at some point). But for now? Since my follower count does absolutely not reflect on how many people actually like me and/or my art, I’m going to be as chaotic as fucking ever and do whatever the fuck I want.

So yes, I do find it comical that I lost 1k followers over this and am not fazed in the very least, especially because I literally foreshadowed losing 1k and hit the fucking jackpot.

The only reason I’m talking about this at all is because 1- it’s impossible not to notice my follower count decreasing, especially because every new 1k I thank people publicly through stories; 2- some people were actually worried I was upset over it and I have to 3- show that I am not, while simultaneously trying to show people that just because you’re losing followers doesn’t mean you have to stop doing what you want to create content to please people. It doesn’t mean you should be upset, and it doesn’t mean that what you’re doing is bad or wrong.

It means you’re fucking renewing your followers & you’ll now grow for what you’re trying to grow for, bitch. That’s what it’s all about.

Obviously, people do take a great risk doing this. I am taking a great risk doing this. I could’ve lost 5k, I could’ve lost 10k. But I only lost 1k! And that’s because I believe in the project I worked on; I knew there were people out there who enjoyed what I was doing and it’s on them that I was focused on. On the people who supported me AND my art, not just that one single funny comic post I did 3 years ago.

This answer is 100% a lot longer than what you could’ve possibly expected for and I am typing this while being awake for more than 24h so I’m sure that I’ve repeated myself a lot and that there are a lotta typos or w/e and I apologize for that!! But I’m too lazy to go back to read everything over & turn this into a neat post & I’m pretty sure I could answer your question in the first paragraph.

Oh and also. Yes. Yes I have been drawing gay shit ever since I’ve become an artist because I’m so fucking pissed at the lack of canon gay content in a way that it’s depicted as a normal fucking romantic couple instead of having eeeeeeeeveryone point their finger to the gay couple and scream “HEY THAT’S GAY!!! THIS CAN’T BE PART OF THIS VERY HETEROSEXUAL SHOW WHERE EVERYONE IS OBVIOUSLY HETEROSEXUAL EVEN THOUGH NONE OF THE CHARACTERS HAVE EVER SAID THAT EXPLICITLY BECAUSE WE KNOW THAT THE CREATORS ARE EITHER HETEROSEXUAL OR TOO AFRAID TO LOSE AUDIENCE IF THEY TREAT GAY PEOPLE AS NORMAL PEOPLE!??!! WHAT SORT OF ABSURD NONSENSE IS THAT??!! GAY PEOPLE AREN’T NORMAL!! THEY’RE GAY AND THEY SHOULD HAVE A GAY SHOW JUST FOR THEM IF THEY WANNA GET SCREENTIME” and yadda yadda yadda.

I’m tired of this bullshit. Ever since I was an artist I’ve been rooting for gay ships in shonen manga while knowing they would never happen just because they were gay, and now that we are in our Blessed-By-Satan, Pandemic-Chaotic, What-The-Fuck-Is-Going-On, We-Don’t-Know-If-We-Wanna-Go-Back-Or-To-The-Future-Or-Just-IDK-Fucking-Die year 2020, in which the LGBT community is thriving and being louder than ever to fight for our rights, Me, in my twenty four years of fucking age, having gone through several fucking disappointments ONLY regarding this matter, am sitting here on my ass, hopeful as all galactic, glittery shit that for some fucking reason, my new OTP formed by very underrated characters from this very underrated franchise in the southern and western communities, becomes canon because my stupid eyes can see chemistry between them even though those stupid haters’ can’t. But that’s because they’re stupid and homophobic, and they really should just shut the fuck up. I don’t wanna dream, I want to believe. Let a bitch pray in peace.

But even if I’m getting ready for disappointment, I’m gonna make this project happen and I’m gonna have a shit ton of artbooks from this Thunder Flames project inside my fucking garage if no one wants to buy them. But I am going to invest a shit ton of money in it and I am going to have these artbooks come to life. Because I am spiteful and petty and homophobes should shut the fuck up, and I wanna do what I wanna do bc as an independent artist, I’m building my future with my own two, very toned and buff by now from all the drawing I did, hands. 

God fucking damn it.

Jesus christ I’m just rambling at this point, I’m so sorry. If anyone ever reads this out of context people are going to be so confused.

But that’s fine. They won’t. You know why? Cuz I got almost 11k followers here on tumblr but less than 0.5% gives a shit that I’m here, so I’m safe.

Have a nice day, drink your water and fuck homophobes. Peace

[thegreatescape]

SHARE THE LOVE CONVENTION

Here’s what happened at the Share The Love Con in Milan! :) [Sorry for my terrible English lol]

At the con I was in the front row with my friends. It was amazing but at the same time I felt a little bit observed lol Pietro was the first one who greeted me and then Nicholas recognized me ;; 

After the panel, my friend and I decided to take a picture with Federico because he was too beautiful with that blue sweater and when we went to take the picture he gave us a tight hug that I will remember forever. I don't know why but I was more nervous than the previous times... maybe because he was even more beautiful than usual lol 

Then we queued for the Fede + Rocco duo and I don’t know where I found the courage but I showed them a photo in which two people were kissing a girl on the cheek and this happened sdifhoisadpo 

Damn Fede has really soft lips, I cry just thinking about it. I left the room shaking like a leaf lol Then we went to the autographs of Nicholas, Greta and Beatrice. Greta and Bea were a wonderful surprise. They are both so kind and sweet. When Greta saw my drawing she gave me a hug and said ‘thank you’ a hundred of times. She was sooo cute! ;; 

Even Beatrice thanked me so much and complimented me and said “You drew me so hot!” And I was like "Well, you are" haha ​​

Then I went to Nicholas and this happened:

Nicholas: Hi! I'm a big fan of yours!

And I smiled at him sooo embarrassed.

Nicholas: I don't know how to thank you! I’m very tired after a drawing, you draw 10 drawings every day! You're very good.

Then Greta arrived at his table and said: Did you see my beautiful drawing with the pink background?

And he was like: Mine is gray! :(

Me: I made the backgrounds based on the shirt you had in the photos and you always have a black shirt.

Nicholas: I have to do a photoshoot then haha

Nicholas then asked me to show some of my drawings to Bea and when I showed her my Instagram profile she remembered those I had done for her and Greta added: Oh my God you made me the drawing of me and Nini kissing? It's beautiful! ; _;

This is Nicholas’ autograph. He drew me Luchino eating pizza’s crusts LOL

Then we went to the autographs of Pietro, Fede and Rocco and I have to say that this was one of the most beautiful moments of the Convention. When Pietro saw me he greeted me with an "Hello darling, how are you?" And before I answered he said: "Did you bring me something?" And when I gave him the drawing he said: “Oh my God, it's awesome! This is a new one!”

Me: “Well, yes, I couldn't post it before, it had to be a surprise!”

Pietro: “Can I keep it? ;)”

Me: “Sure it's for you! Also, sorry if I tag you on so many drawings.”

Pietro: “It makes me so happy! You drew the futuristic black and white one, the one where I’m in Venice, the one with the flag you gave me last time and ... this, right? (he remembered all of them ; ___;) And then he added: “But you drew Federico more :( AHAHAH”

Then I went to Fede and he said: “I know that yesterday was your birthday so… HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” And he sent me a kiss. I died. Then I gave him the drawing and he thanked me and he looked at me with a pleased smile saying: “What can I write here ..?” And he wrote me this beautiful autograph that I’ve to frame. 

Then, without saying anything, he got up and hugged me and it was a beautiful moment because I didn't want to let him go. Maybe that was the best hug- not only because it lasted longer but because I could tell him how grateful I was for everything.

Then I went to Rocco and he greeted me with a big smile saying: “Hello Giulia, how are you ?!” And I was actually dying inside so I immediately gave him the drawing and he said something like: “Wtf is this a drawing? Oh my God it’s amazing thank you so much” and he showed it to Fede.

Then in the afternoon there were other panels but for those I will make a special mentions at the end of the post.

Then there was Fede and Rocco meet & greet. It was pretty weird because we were all so shy and we didn’t know what to say so they told us something that happened on set during Marti and Nico reunion on the terrace in 2x09.

Fede: “Ludovico told us ‘Kiss!', so we did it. It was so romantic, but when we stopped, I noticed that I had Rocco's snot on my cheek. So I said: WHAT THE FUCK IS IT? THIS IS DISGUSTING! and the atmosphere was ruined.

Rocco: “It's true HAHAHA”

Fede: “I had your snot on me all the time! You were always crying!

Rocco: "Yes, there was an important exchange of body fluids. AHHA”

Then we went to eat the pizza with the cast. The first one who sat at our table was Federico. I was the first one to get the pizza and he said: “Well you're the birthday girl that’s why they gave you the pizza first”. I just smiled like an idiot and he said: “Eat it or it gets cold!"

Me: "No, I'm waiting for you …"

He: “But if it gets cold, it sucks”. (it sucked anyway haha)

Then me and my friends started arguing with him bc Federico claimed that the pizza has to be cut in 8 pieces (and we were cutting it in 4). Thankfully Pietro arrived and supported us and told Fede: “Stop being so annoying” ahah.

After that, there was the most embarrassing interaction that I've ever had with him. We looked at each other and he smiled, so I smiled back but I was too nervous to say anything. Basically we kept smiling for like 15 seconds and it all ended with an embarrassing silence :))))

Then Rocco sat right next to me and he was so… excited? Haha

Rocco: “Did you eat today?”

Me: “No, we were anxious…”

Rocco: “Why? C’mon we know each other now! We’re friends!” (I almost cried, I swear).

Then I showed him a bracelet that my friends bought me for my bday (a heart with the word ‘Sbedemmic’ written on it) and he enlightened and said: “Nooo! Oh my god! Sbedemmic !? A-ma-zing!”

Then we asked him how to pronounce “Maxence” and Rocco called him at out table and Maxence rushed to us leaning towards us and we were blown away because he has really beautiful eyes and honestly I didn't even listen to what he said ahaha

Then Nicholas joined us and said  "I want to sit right next to Giulia” (I wanted to hug him ;u;) and we talked about drawings and it was wonderful. Then at a certain point I don't remember what he wanted to ask Bea and he started to call her addressing a girl at the table next to ours and only after a while we pointed out that Bea was sitting on the other side of the room and he was like: “Who was I calling? The girl doesn't even have hair like Bea!” HAHAH

Before he left we hugged each other tight and we  thanked each other for everything.

Maxence is literally an elf. He is nice, funny and he gave me a lot of positivity. We asked him to take a photo all together and he immediately put the glass of wine down because “If my mom sees the picture she gets angry” xD He said he never had the chance to interact so much with the fans at the events and that he thinks it’s amazing to create a bond with us.

Then I apologized bc I tag him on a lot of drawings and he asked me “Wait, what did you draw?”

Before I answered him he started to jump on the chair saying “The raccoon one!?”

Me: “Yes, even the-”

He: “The one with the shirt! Come on, let me see it!”

So I showed him the drawing and he exclaimed: “YEEEEES! THIS ONE! YEEEEES! THE SHIRT!!!”

He thanked me and I closed instagram, but I had forgotten to change my background and I had a photograph of me with Federico.

Maxence saw it and said: “Is that your boyfriend?"

And I said: “I WISH!”

I swear I didn't want to say it out loud, but it was spontaneous. He widened his eyes and literally burst into laughing while I turned RED. I apologized saying it wasn’t my intention to say it out loud but he said that he got that bc he read the panic in my eyes as soon as I realized it, but he appreciated my spontaneity and he said that it will be our little secret xD (then we talked outside and we took a couple of photos, he even chose the poses AHAHAH but then we got caught and the staff told him to go inside xD).

1 December

The second day in the morning we went to the autographs of Robin and Lukas and they both thanked me so much for the drawings (I will never forget their expressions ;;). 

After giving Lukas the drawing he stood up and hugged me tight and he was the sweetest, with his beautiful and kind smile :’)

Then I took a photo with Nicholas 

and a duo with Maxence and Rocco where I asked for a group hug and Maxence said: A POLIPATA ?! (an Italian word that idk how to translate. Obviously Rocco taught him that haha it’s like “hugging like an octopus” lol)

The last photos were those with Federico. When I showed him the photo I wanted to do he made an expression that I will never forget a mix between a smile and ;) and he said: “Uh, today we are in the mood for kisses”. And of course I turned BRIGHT RED :DDD

The last activity of the day was the autograph with Maxence. He thanked me for the drawing and said "You made me a beautiful drawing, so I will also make your own beautiful drawing" and he made a stylized character of me ahaha

At the cocktail party Maxence was the first one to sit with us! He didn’t know what to say so he asked us to do a toast and we all said in chorus 'cin-cin' and he said: "Do you know that ‘cin-cin’ means vagina in Chinese?” Ahah This was the highlight of our conversation.

Then Nicholas and Rocco came at our table and we talked all the time about medicines and reflux lmao We looked like the geriatric department bc they said that all the cocktails tasted like medicines lol 

Then Pietro and Fede arrived, both sooo tired, but Fede greeted us with "Hello rays of sunshine!" And we were literally dying . Pietro said he was worried about not being able to return home because he would have arrived after midnight and he didn't have the keys. "I can't call someone and say "Hi, I'm the guy who lives upstairs" ahaha

Then we talked to Lukas and Robin and they were so cute ;; Lukas is a very interesting person, he has a pure soul and it was a pleasure to know him ;; 

In the end, Bea and Greta arrived and we gossiped a lot, especially about boys haha

Best moments of PANELs:

-Nicholas said his favorite word is Australopithecus Robustus and Greta said "Fregno" (it’s a slang for ‘hot’) xD

-Fede said his Spirit animal is a Golden Retriever and that Martino’s is a fox

-Fede made fun of Rocco because he spoke with metaphors that didn’t make any sense so Fede was like: Enough Rocco, enough! Stop it! THAT'S ENOUGH!

-We made a video for Bea and everyone cried in the room

-THE KARAOKE

-Fede said that Rocco didn’t know how to ride a bicycle and they had to shoot that scene a lot of times

-Fede complimented Rocco and then he gave the microphone to him saying: “Come on, I’m waiting.” Because he wanted to get compliments too haha

-Rocco sat in the audience and asked Fede the story of Bambi and Fede called him “Er Lucertola (lizard)” in revenge and said that the name of Bambi was born because of a toxic (Rocco haha)

-Pietro who answered BOH to all the questions haha

-When a girl mentioned the 4th season (even if we couldn’t) and everyone said to keep hoping and thanked us for fighting so much during these months and then Rocco said: Yes, thank you very much for the support. Without you it wouldn't have been pos— Everyone: ROCCO !!!!! haha

-When another girl talked about Massimo Reale -Dr. Spera- (referring to the photos he posted from the 4th season’s set) and then Bea said: She just wanted to know the name of Dr. Spera and yes, it’s Massimo Reale xD

-Rocco screaming SBEDEM

Here’s some pics I took at the panels :) 

Everything was AWESOME! I miss them all so much ;;

Please if you want to use one of these pics tag my instagram account:  here

[peachdoxie]

I didn’t get around to posting last week’s liveblog of Rhythm of War, so I’m going to post both chapters 14 and 15 here. Let’s get to it!

Some of the Fused on Braize slumbered...

SLUMBERED?

Timbre pulsed a warning inside her, and Venli forcibly resisted those instincts. It was not easy. Perhaps as a Surgebinder, she should have been naturally selfless. Naturally noble. Like Eshonai. 

Ah, identity/Identity stuff. Fun.

fannahn-im, the Altered Ones

Cool, another type of Fused.

In that light, these tombs were a flagrant, wasteful act—the ultimate price for this show was paid not by the Nine, but by the poor singers they had killed to give them bodies.

Something something Marxism and the labor of the proletariat

She was both the very crust of the unimportant and the very dregs of the important.

I like this line.

Avendla was their name for Alethkar; Venli’s powers instantly knew the meaning of the word. Land of the Second Advance. Her abilities stopped there, however, and she couldn’t answer the more interesting question. Why was it called that?

Yeah, why DO they call Alethkar “Land of the Second Advance”? Hmm...

“You think I could be defeated by a common human?” the Pursuer demanded. “This Windrunner must be of the Fourth Ideal—something I was led to believe had not yet happened. Perhaps our reconnaissance teams have lost their edge, during the long time spent between Returns.”

HAHA GET FUCKED YOU GOT REKT BY KALADIN “ONLY SWORN THE THIRD IDEAL” STORMBLESSED

Each new wave of attacks had involved what was called a Return, when the Fused would descend to Roshar.

Yeah uh anyone else suspicious of the word “Return” bc that’s really similar to the Returned in Warbreaker.

None of them realize she’s trying to protect that Windrunner, Venli thought. Maybe she doesn’t realize it herself.

Leshwi has officially joined the Kaladin Protection Squad.

“There are few among them of the Fourth Ideal—perhaps only one individual—and they do not have full access to the tower, now that the Sibling is dead.”

Okay, first: who’s the one who might have sworn the Fourth Ideal? Is she referring to Kaladin or someone else??? No one we’ve seen has sworn the Fourth Ideal...

ALSO. S I B L I N G L O R E.

“You have nearly perfected the suppression fabrials,” Raboniel said. “Do not forget, it is technology I discovered from the tower itself thousands of years ago. I have a plan to use it in a more dramatic way. As the Sibling is essentially a deadeye, I should be able to turn the tower’s defenses against its owners.”

The Sibling is “essentially a deadeye.” But not an actual deadeye. But just a moment ago she said that the Sibling is dead. WHAT THE FUCK. GIVE ME LORE.

“We will need to lure the Elsecaller and the Bondsmith away. Their oaths may be advanced enough to push through the suppression, much as the Unmade have done at the tower in the past.”

First. What the fuck. Second, what the fuck???

“During the last Return, she developed a disease intended to kill all humans on the planet. Near the end, it was discovered that the disease would likely kill many singers as well. She released it anyway…only to find, to all of our fortunes, that it did not work as expected. Fewer than one in ten humans were killed, and one in a hundred singers.”

That’s a yikes but also how have we not heard of this illness yet?

“If you forget why you are fighting, then victory itself becomes the goal.”

Something something Journey before destination

“In addition, this endeavor will give me the opportunity to test some… theories I have developed while slumbering these last millennia.”

SLUMBERING

“Last time, her recklessness nearly cost us everything.”

GIVE. ME. THE. LORE.

***

Kaladin announced that Sigzil—with whom he’d conferred earlier in the day—would take over daily administration of the Windrunners, overseeing things like supplies and recruitment.

I am not surprised that Sigzil is now in charge.

“I know you are, sir. But I have no interest in taking ‘what I can get.’ And I don’t think you should force a spren into a bond. It will make for a bad precedent, sir.” He hummed a different rhythm. “You all name me a squire, but I can’t draw Stormlight like the rest. There’s a wedge between me and the Stormfather, I think. Strange. I expected prejudice from humans, but not from him… Anyway, I will wait for a spren who will bond me for who I am—and the honor I represent.”

Literally not at all surprised that Rlain is turning Yunfah down. I expected as much. That still means Yunfah is without a bond. Also, I wonder if Rlain will bond with a spren that’s not an honorspren. Rlain for Nightwatcher Bondsmith 2k20

Or maybe, another part of him thought, you could do what you promised him—and listen for once.

Yeah, Kaladin, you should listen to Rlain. Take a lesson from Lift in that.

“But you couldn’t give up the sword,” Kaladin said.

“Oh, I gave it up. I let go. Best mistake I ever made.”

Lmao I’m betting Zahel is referring to one veeeery specific sword.

100% not surprised that Zahel is doing stuff with cloth. That’s like Awakening 101.

Honestly this scene with Kaladin fighting Zahel in the clotheslines is wonderful. It’s cinematic, actually.

“I’m not confident anyone knows the answers. I figure I’ll let the people who care argue about it, and I’ll keep my head down and focus on my life right now.”

Agnostic Kaladin. I didn’t know I could love this man more but I do.

“I don’t have to believe,” the voice drifted back. “I know gods exist. I simply hate them.”

Lmao since on Nalthis he was considered a god.

“You want to know what I am? Well, I’m a lot of things. Tired, mostly.”

God what a mood

“That’s because Wit is an asshole.”

BEST FUCKING MOMENT OF RHYTHM OF WAR SO FAR

“Happened to your friend too. Up in the prison? The one with… that sword.”

Well, that answers two questions. One, what happened to Szeth after Oathbringer? Two, does Zahel know Szeth has Nightblood? Also, it seems that Szeth still has possession of Nightblood. Wonder how he managed to do that.

“She’s what I now call a Type One Invested entity. I decided that had to be the proper way to refer to them. Power that came alive on its own.”

“Type Two Invested entity. Dead man walking.”

Interesting. It seems based on Vasher’s BioChromatic entity scale, but not the same.

Kaladin frowned, trying to figure out why Zahel was telling him this.

Good question. Why IS Zahel telling him this?

“The longer one of us exists, the more like a spren we become. Consumed by a singular purpose, our minds bound and chained by our Intent. We’re spren masquerading as men. That’s why she takes our memories. She knows we aren’t the actual people who died, but something else given a corpse to inhabit…”

Sure, Zahel. Just drop us some fucking lore right here. We kinda already knew it but to have it laid out here is something else. But it’s still interesting, especially with the part about capital-I Intent, and Endowment taking memories.

***

Anyway, that’s chapters 14 and 15! Some interesting stuff going on, including what will probably be one of my favorite scenes in Rhythm of War.

[cuddleslutloki]

2018 fics, a year in review

i’m a madman, but even my crazy ass probably won’t finish and post another fic in the last 6 hours of 2018, so here are all the fics i posted on ao3 this year, plus some thoughts on each!

Hemlock Honey and Silver

this was my last ever supernatural fandom fic. literally the end of an era for me since i was in the spn fandom for so damn long and wrote so much fic, about two-thirds of which has been orphaned on the archive at this point because i didn’t like the stories anymore lol. 

i do like that one, though, and i’m actually alright with it being my last ever spn/destiel fic

Fire In Your Veins

this was my first time posting thorki fic! i was so, so nervous about it, but everyone in this fandom is so chill and lovely. i still like this one, and i don’t think i write enough 69ing lmao. also this fic was obvs the start of something bigger bc. i mean. i’ve written so much damn fic now lol since i only started posting in june. i was worried that i wasn’t going to be writing anymore, or that i’d never be posting on ao3 again because it had been literally 2 full years between hemlock honey and silver and the fic that preceded it. then i fell into thorki and i started writing fic and it’s just been such a huge, huge thing. bc i’m also writing original stuff again for the first time in forever.

Underdressed and All Out of Time

a direct sequel to fire in your veins, i really like it. i felt like i was able to characterize loki fairly well in this one bc i was very insecure about the way i wrote loki when i started out

A Thousand Teeth, Yours Among Them

who doesn’t love a fic title from a hozier song? i remember writing this fic and wondering if it was any good and if my characterization was okay and still being nervous and insecure in my writing, but it’s been very well received so i kinda got my inner critic to stfu which is nice lol. i also really enjoyed doing this vignette style story

To Always Face the Sun

what if :) loki was happy :) and thor had his brother back :) lol i really liked writing this and having loki being such a little shit tbh. can we tell that i like a happy ending in fic?

Blue On Gold

so i wrote an arranged marriage fic where they never actually get married and it’s still 15.8k lmfao. also the return of the vignette style, which was fun bc i got to do short, impactful scenes and build the narrative with them. i remember sitting at my desk at work, on my phone, writing this fic, then coming home and editing on a damn tablet bc my laptop bricked earlier this year

the warmth of your doorway

i meant to capitalize the title but at this point i’ve decided to leave it lol. i really loved writing this bc i felt very confident in the way i was building the scenes and the detail i was able to incorporate. i feel like this is where i really kinda go my voice back and i start to come into my own, if that makes sense? one of my fave fics i’ve ever written tbh. there’s a longer ‘verse for this, but after i finished this fic i got too distracted by new projects to try and continue it lol

Tell Me

this was my first trans!loki fic and he’s a trans man, and god i love it. i’ve got another ftm loki story as a WIP in my gdocs bc this story showed me how much i fucking love writing trans characters, and i really enjoyed the dynamic i put into this fic. there’s a sequel planned lol it’s gonna be dirty

Interwoven

i still haven’t managed to ever find the post that inspired this damn fic and if you wonder whether that drives me up the wall the answer is yes (: and fun fact! i intentionally never describe loki’s genitals in this fic, bc i was picturing him as a trans guy since i’d just written tell me and now i have a massive obsession with writing trans romance and erotica

Tie Breaker

in this house we love and appreciate bottom thor!!! also i loved writing the sparring at the beginning. it makes me wanna write more fics w/ brutal fight scenes lol. thor’s slutty drunk cape outfit is iconic and i’m gonna read that comic just for that outfit honestly

Pretense of Subjugation

i became drunkenly obsessed with loki manspreading on the throne of asgard and this was the result. this was the first thorki fic of mine that i’d had beta’d and it was vastly, vastly improved by it. the tips @ktspree13 gave me when she helped with this fic have affected literally every single fic i’ve written since

Double and More

so this is not the first thorki fic i ever posted, of course, however it is the first i ever started writing. i got to the point where loki’s in thor’s lap and then i kinda blanked out and let the fic sit for like... 2 or 3 months? then i opened it back up and i was like “oh i like this i should finish this” which is why i don’t delete anything anymore bc there’s always a chance i’ll come back to it

Ringback Tone

y’all owe @thotki for the wondrous idea they presented in discord that ended up creating this fic. i think i wrote this fic in like 3 days bc of how much fun i was having with it. the dirty talk was my favorite thing to write in this and i remember distinctly having this [:< moment when i was daydreaming about it

Seldom All They Seem

there was an impromptu bottom thor day back on 20 oct and this fic was my contribution. we can never have enough time travel, can we? i remember i think i took like a four day weekend from work and part of my motivation was literally wanting to finish this fic in time to post it lmfao

Fluffy Thorki Sunday Ficlets

i started doing fluffy thorki sunday back when i was on bourbonbucky and i continued it here, and i’m proud that i’ve written at least 1 piece for fluffy thorki sunday every sunday since i started. i love doing fluff and smut, and honestly even when my mood has been shit, i’ve always felt motivated to try and improve it at least enough to write some nice fluff. i put all of these on ao3 once i moved blogs

Let Love Disrupt

this is another fic we owe to discord lmao. i remember posting this when i was either very drunk or very tired and having to keep going onto ao3 on my damn phone browser to correct minor shit, and some not so minor shit like a typo in the title bc at first it said “distrupt” and that’s why i only post when i’m awake and sober now lmfao

Without Fear

i love werewolves (: a whole bunch (: and this fic is something dirty and wonderful that i’m proud of and THERE’S ART bc @nekokat42 is a blessing and takes commissions. kot i love u :3

On the Other Side Like Always

i have a lot of feelings about this fic. there’s an entire future in this ‘verse that i would so love to write, but i’m stuck on where to go with it. as it stands i am satisfied with this as a story of thor and loki coming together, and a story about how loki does something out of desperation but is finally given something genuine and comforting in his life like he’s always deserved. THERE’S ART from the wondrous @boltplumart / @mrhiddles bc allie is perfect :]

Runaway

when i tell y’all i’m a trash gremlin king. i do have a thing for writing underage characters with adults (probs due to messy personal history lmfao ain’t gonna look at that too closely) and so writing this one was a fun little bit of self indulgence. also it’s dirty and really plays into codependency, which i always like writing bc it’s a fun thing to explore in fiction

Sunset Rhapsody

this fic. was supposed to be. two thousand words. at most. then thor smiled at me, as the writer, and was like “i want to own him” and we ended up with 11k of thor’s obsessive bs and loki being brutal. joking aside, i love this fic, i love what i did with it, i have an original story i wanna write for my size kink anthology that will follow a similar thread to this one. also that torture scene. i don’t recall if i ever properly wrote torture before, but this did kinda make me squirm a bit when i was writing it and if you’ve read it you know precisely which scene i’m talking about lmfao

Right to Guard

this fic was honestly very emotionally satisfying for me in a pretty visceral way. writing thor just surrendering to love and spoiling the fuck out of loki was pretty damn cathartic. 

A Bite of Lamb

me making sure i never lose my title as a trash gremlin king. honestly writing thor’s POV in this fic was like >.> at myself a couple times bc it felt distinctly dark in a way i’d never written another character. a very, very unhealthy kind of obsession and this twisted logic where he’s trying to make it all okay. i really fucking love this damn fic tho and i’m happy with how it came out. 

Seamless

i was so, so frustrated and pissed off at work that i needed to let that shit out, so that was channeled into this very guilt-ridden turned tender fic, and i really enjoyed writing it. loved writing thor taking care of his baby sister. also! KOT IS FUCKING AMAZING and drew this bc they’re such a good fucking person ;A; like they sent me a message and just said “really liked this scene” and i was D Y I N G and i still am. thank you again, kot!

The Way A Rose Blooms

this was written for the thorki secret santa exchange! i drew @chickcheney and honestly the list of prompts was so, so good. bottom thor, arranged marriage, semi-public sex and trying not to be caught, body worship. i was like “damn did i draw myself wtf” bc that is all up my alley. 

Sugar Cookie

i honestly could not think of a better fic to finish off 2018 for me than sugar cookie. porn and emotions that’s all this is, but it features loki as a trans woman being loved and appreciated as she is with nothing extra expected of her and it was so satisfying to write. it makes me want to write original romance with trans women, which i’ll definitely do bc i loved writing this hungry and tender story and i’m very happy with how i ended it. 

so that was 2018 for me! 

[soosdraws]

I hope it’s ok to ask for advice but how do you stay motivated with an art blog? I always end up deleting 😭

SO I TYPED THIS UP IN MY NOTES APP BC THIS IS SUPER LONG BUT,,,

ANYHOW! Of course it’s okay! Don’t hesitate to ask anything 💖 I hope you don’t mind the late response, I wanted to take time to answer it because it’s something I really used to struggle with too!

I can only talk about what works for me personally, but I hope my way of thinking helps you out ;;;;

Anyways, first of all I would say: don’t give a shit! About anything or anyone! I also used to have an art blog before this one (that I deleted lol) but it was because I was really focused on trying to get notes and stuff that it completely made me not want to draw??? Or I was focused too much on trying to “find a style” or keep my art blog all consistent and nice. That really made me sad and just… not want to run an art blog. So I deleted. However, for this one, I literally just started it because I was bored one day during college and just wanted to start posting stuff again so I just??? Did??? And THEN I fell back into Naruto and it became like the only thing I drew, which really is where my blog started to grow!

At this point, as you can probably tell, I really… don’t care about much lol like at first I wanted to keep this an art only blog which… UM. YEAH… now I just kinda post anything I want? Even the random thoughts I have at 2AM that are probably really stupid in hind sight. But I think that’s okay actually! It lets other people know who you are better and also kinda gets rid of some boundaries where it allows other people to share their thoughts with you too! And then you make mutuals, then friends, and it’s all really fun lol

Also notes! I think that’s really what brings down a lot of artists. Because it shows that people are viewing your content and appreciating it! And it’s completely valid. Like you’re allowed to feel upset if something you worked really hard on doesn’t get the attention you want. And I fell into that a lot too! Like in the beginning when I posted my stuff (not on this one, but the blog I deleted) I’d probably get a single note or maybe 30 at most? And it really brought down my self confidence, thinking that maybe I really wasn’t good enough and no one liked my art. But that’s not true at all! It’s just very hard to get attention on a site that has millions of other talented people. You’re also VERY talented, it’s just a matter of finding your own audience, which comes in time! Like even now, yeah I have art that hit 2k+ notes, but I also have my fair share that still are in the single digits lol and at first I was still really disheartened by that, but now I’m more okay with it, because as I said, I’ve sorta stopped trying to focus on the notes part. Instead, I just try to post what I like, and what I think is good and if it doesn’t get that many notes, instead of dwelling on feeling bad I immediately hype myself up going like “ITS OKAY!!! There’s always next time!!!” And just draw the next idea I wanted to draw to get my mind off things. My motivator is usually myself and like just always having a next thing to draw lol. And if you can’t think of things to draw, just draw whatever! Like a stick figure, usually studies of things help a lot! From photographs or real life. It really sharpens up your skills 💖 and once you start mindlessly drawing, sometimes you start to just find love in what you’re doing and you find that in the end? It’s okay that your art didn’t maybe get enough notes, because YOU love it.

However, there are definitely times where that’s not the case, and it’s okay to let yourself be sad. Vent it out, even if it’s not art. I’ve just actually taken a nap sometimes when I felt too sad to do anything lol And then refresh!

Which leads to my second point! Draw what YOU love! There’s a lot of artists, me included, that try to draw things that are “in” or popular, in order to gain a following and that is completely okay!! However, for me I just couldn’t keep up with it and I just became overwhelmed with the plethora of other talented artists that were also drawing for that certain thing and instead fell back into self-doubt. As for this time though, I literally found that I couldn’t stop drawing Naruto lmao. Like I just have so many ideas I want to draw for the fandom and I found that since I’m passionate in it, others who are into it also just naturally fall into it! So if you enjoy it, that’s the best part for sure 💖

And like, if you find that you’ve run yourself dry of inspiration, reason, or love for drawing: take a break! I actually took a really long break from art one time (I mean like… a complete year I just didn’t draw anything omg) because my self-confidence had hit rock bottom. Instead, take time to seek out shows, books, nature walks, or just anything besides art to keep you occupied and one day the want to draw will just like… hit you. And when that feeling hits, draw! And if you like it post it! Start anew too if you feel like it! And if your next drawing inspiration doesn’t hit for awhile that’s okay too 💖 it can be really pressuring to feel like you need to keep posting art in order to keep your audience engaged but that will tire you out. Just post your best quality work that YOU love! And you’ll find that the fact that it getting not many notes or any of that other self-doubt thin that we artists usually have in common, start to fade away a little.

Also, be your own hype man!! Like you didn’t get enough notes?? Post again or reblog your post again and be like “HEY!! I DREW THIS!!!” Like there’s no shame in wanting validation for your work. And if you start feeling bad about the lack of audience just be your own #1 fan. It was like that for me for awhile too, because I started this blog only a few months ago?? And of course in the beginning it was just like me and my one (1) irl friend and I was just like hey I really like this thing I drew!! I’m gonna post it!!! And just kept doing that! Make your art be about YOU and what you love and motivation will naturally come to you! Also don’t hesitate to reach out to your friends to hype you up too. Like obviously, we can’t support ourselves 100% of the time, and during those times just take time to be with people who you know will give you love 💖

And if you do decide to start up and art blog please tell me (only if you want djfjsjdjjs) I’ll support you 💖 we artists gotta stick together since we’re always our worst critic 💪

[princeyitz]

who are your favorite simblrs and why? love ur stuff xx

oh man this is a huge question!!!! i follow a lOT of people so uhh idk if i don’t include you im really sorry!!! i’m mostly going to put people i’ve been following for awhile in this - or at least simblrs i’m caught up on idk this is maybe a follow forever idk man!!!

also this is in no way organized lmao im really tired

another also i realized i put a lot of people on here and i gushed a bit so i’m putting this under a read more to save u all ok bye

my fave stories/legacies/etc!!!

@a-kind-red​ not only is red super sweet but he also has an aMAZING story and i’m still trying to get caught up but whOOOO boy if you’re wanting to really get into a story pleeeease give them a follow!!!

@musicalpixls i really love amy’s nsb it’s really awesome and her writing is really great also i love lyte a lot

if you’re not following @qwertysims​ please fix it asAP raven is fuckin’ awesome and makes really unique and beautiful sims i’m a Big Raven Stan

@teanmoon​ inga is sO so sweet?? and i’m really diggin’ her ariadne challenge. you can tell she really puts a lot of research and time and love into it and i really admire it/her!!!!

gotta talk about my girl @xuni​!!! her sims are so cute??? i die honestly

you wanna cry at beautiful edits and giggle at fun and cute gameplay? check out keek @whiisker​

my girl breezy @simblrbreezycakes​!!! sUPER sweet and writing a beautiful story. seriously i love when i can hear characters’ voices in my head as i’m reading and breezy nails this 

@keysims​ has an amazing story??? i love damien i don’t even cARE. also editing is fuckin’ top notch and you can tell how much effort goes in

@wooldawn​ meshelle’s sims are so unique and beautiful she inspires me a lot?? i’ve been following for awhile and i just. i love everything she posts

this wouldn’t be complete if i didn’t include @takemizzu​ and gush about her. bree has such a fresh and different simblr but its not forced at all??? like i fuckin’ stan so hard. all of her monsters are amazing and she puts so much into them and i love seeing when she posts. if you love gore, horror, monsters and fun check her outttt!!! (also ps give ricky a smooch 4 me)

@ratboysims​ prrrrobably one of the first simblrs i followed?? i read emmett’s legacy from the beginning and cried. do u remember jonathan and darius bc i do. i love finch, i love birdie my name twin, i feel for sam, i miss dove and leo, roxie is a babe i miss her. he has cute rats, he makes beautiful art and you should follow him forever

@smallcowplant​ follow sam!!! follow her on all your accounts!!!! she’s so sweet and has this beautiful way with words i just??? you like history? she’s got that. you like ladies who murder husbands?? got that too. you like romance and cute boys competing for a total babe’s heart?? GUESS WHAT SHE GOT THAT TOO.  her edits are super cute as well and i stan her dog to the end of the world

i’m pretty sure everyone is already following @okyio​ because christy is literally a ball of light but in case you aren’t pleeease get on it. she constantly brightens my day no matter what she posts and she is one of the few people out there who is GENUINE in care and kindness. she makes beautiful edits, draws super cute art and just wants everyone to take care of themselves and just. ball of light. i’m serious

@bratsims​ is hilarious and you gotta read the woods from the beginning bc. just do it. i’m still sad about arthur and also i think sunny should be make another appearance somehow. also??? wylie?? im love him and he should just have 10 partners okay and i wanna give mei a big hug

follow @eefahsims​ purely for elliot please i’m begging u make that boy happy i love him. also her bio is “raw power of roadhog mindset of torbjorn” so that should b an instant follow tbh

@tea-sims​ super sweet, has beautiful gameplay??? want 2 give her a hug tbh

@blarffy​ here’s another simblr i’ve followed since i started mine. read her greene legacy from the beginning it does not disappoint. makes beautiful sims, is beautiful, super nice and always willing to help. top notch person in general 

@peonypyxels v nice, has cute sims, has beautiful screenshots, i can’t wait for the next update on her story its so!!! ahhh!!!!

here’s another simblr i’m pretty sure everyone is also already following but i’m putting her here anyway: @ridgeport makes amazing cc, has a hilarious and fun gameplay, beautiful edits? check. also very sweet and i stan her sims’ noses, it’s a Thing.

i follow claudia @plumbee-bob here and on yt, pretty much one of the few that i do watch. she has beautiful, unique sims, and i love how colorful her gameplay always is. she’s so sweet and has a very relaxing voice

really awesome cc/builder simblrs!!!

pretty sure i’ve downloaded liTERALLY everything @pyxiidis​ releases. honestly a Queen. becoming a patron was the best decision i’ve ever made. her cc is Pure Quality and so unique and i use it on every sim i make

i’m pretty sure i download everything @cakenoodles​ makes too. james is super talented

if you love plants you’ll love @magnoliidae​ seriously like how do u do these things??? pretty sure mal is actually magic

@viiavi​ is honestly cc royalty in my eyes like hoooo man i swoon everytime she posts something

@plasmafruit-tree​ i’m obsessed with their makeup cc like it’s so good??? has amazing cc in general also i love the cake’s a LOT

male cc is always lacking but guess who isn’t slacking? @wyattssims​ i’m so sorry for that rhyme but not sorry for promo’ing you bc you deserve it. everything wyatt makes is Quality and he’s also got this really cool ensom project going on and i’m confused but into it

@valhallansim​ another one i’ve followed since the start of my simblr. i loooove all their cc and they make really unique and fun stuff???

a sweetheart: @cubersims makes beautiful recolors and is always a light of sunshine??? 

everything @nolan-sims makes is stunning. she’s incredibly sweet and i love talking to her. she also has beautiful art. if you want to follow someone who not only releases flawless cc, but is also a sweetheart, she’s your gal

UM I THINK THAT’S IT FOR NOW??? again pls don’t take it the wrong way if i didn’t include you i love you all tbh oki im super tired bye

[sufferthesea]

Transitional Period

Okay so I feel really lame writing this but I think it's also important. I keep apologizing for not being super active on this blog anymore, and there's a number of reasons I haven't. Most of it has been health related but anyway. I started this blog because I hated my other blog and wanted to do something new with a fandom I'd been in for a long time (10+ years), so after talking with Katie ( @shiranuigenma ), I decided to create this Naruto blog. But it wasn't intended to be just a Naruto blog, but that's how it kind of ended up since that's what I was into when I made it.

The fact that I've kept this a 98% Naruto blog is awesome because my attention span and energy allotted for a fandom is around 3-4 months. After that I usually get bored or burnt out and have to find something else. Making friends and participating in things like Kakashi Week, and just doing art and writing fanfics, has helped me to maintain interest in this blog for a lot longer than I thought I would. So thank you!! You guys are awesome!!!

(Okay real quick I'm not quitting lol. I know it sounds like it. But I'm not.) Basically, I was getting so burnt out on Naruto that I was dreading getting on this blog and I didn't want to watch it anymore. That's why I've been MIA. I literally only follow Naruto blogs at the moment. I don't want this to become a trash blog like my last one that I abandoned, so I'm still going to be kind of selective with what I reblog. Anyway. To combat the staleness and burnt out feeling I had, I got into a few other shows with my friends and that's really all I've been watching (RWBY, RvB, and YouTube if you're curious). It sounds dumb but it's really helped me a lot because I'm not so exhausted and wearing myself out trying to be ~the cool singular fandom blog~ that I'm really not meant to be. (Yo, major kudos to those who can do that.)

So anyway, 2018 has been not super unkind, but very tough for me. You grow from challenges, right? But it's also important to not be challenging yourself 24/7 for 6 months straight with little sleep and locking yourself away in your bedroom. I am not Maito Gai. I cannot do that. So here's a few things about my blog that'll carry us into summer 2018 and hopefully allow me to be more active and not so stressed and sad!!!! Esp since I still don't have a job even tho I'm looking!! And I'm getting tired of ppl telling me “Well just get a job??? Just go get hired???” like !!! what do you think I am doing???

Requests are now closed indefinitely. I'm going to finish up the few I have, but after that I'm closing them. They were super fun but I have so many things backlogged that it hasn't been as fun anymore. I send love and thanks to all those who sent in requests while they were open! It was a fun experiment and I got to really test myself by writing for characters I don't normally write for!

Writing commissions are closed indefinitely.  I’ll complete the one I have, but then that’ll be it for now. These too were also fun and challenged me more than anything else I've done. I got to write some very unique and difficult topics and I'm so thankful for those who trusted me enough with their stories to do this. However, the amount of time and mental energy it took was too much and severely underselling myself made it difficult to justify the time I was spending. (I've read writers should charge around 1 – 3 cents a word. I was charging $0.001 cents a word lmao. Whoops. I actually don't mind but it is hard to make a living like that.)

Art commissions are still OPEN! And btw, I do have a ko-fi. I'm thinking about doing something like, one coffee = one bust of your character of choosing? (which is same price as commissions whoops lol.) Idk yet. I won't be doing any writing for ko-fi, though.

I was going to create a side blog for the other fandoms I'm in but side blogs are tedious and annoying to manage so I'm probably just going to start posting stuff here. If you don't want to see it, you can start blacklisting tags now. I'll be tagging things as #rwby, #rvb, #not naruto (that's my catch-all tag for anything, uhh, not Naruto). Expect a lot of Ozpin, Qrow, Church, and Washington because even tho I was inactive here, it does not mean I stopped hoeing around in other fandoms. Oh, also expect an occasional #game grumps because #dan avidan is way cute.

I'm also going to be posting fanart for other fandoms here too. It's been nice to draw stuff other than Nardo. I'll still be doing Naruto stuff (I have a ton of Naruto projects I'm working on) but silly little doodles will probably be from RWBY.

I'm also in this weird kinda scary period in my life with school and career options. I have a degree in English and it's always been assumed I'd be a teacher but I don't want to be?? I realized recently that I love to draw and I'm getting quite good at it (with the help of my sister who is my own real-life youtube tutorial for SAI), so both my sister and I are going back to college for a Studio Art degree. I'm thinking about getting into animation and I'm scared because it's not a secure or “traditional” job??? I'm scared because I'm not settling on a job I don't want or a field I just assumed I'd go into. I'm not good with big changes or going into things when it's uncertain, so I'm like ….. /anxiety increases/ But I'm hoping it'll be good.

Just as an extra bullet point and a reminder, I still really love Kakashi, Iruka and Obito, and all my other guys!! Don't think I forgot about them!!

Sorry this is 10 million years long but it was important to me to write all that. I'm sorry I haven't been able to reblog your art or fics and comment on them. I'm sorry I haven't gotten back to you guys and responded to messages. I'm sorry I'm not as active. I've just been figuring stuff out and hanging out with friends, and watching other things so I don't grow to despise Naruto lol. So. That's about it. I probably forgot something.

Oh, I have 21 plants growing in my windowsill. 2 are decorative and the other 19 are going to go in my garden in the backyard bc they’re herbs and vegetables. And I'm going to cosplay for the first time next month and I might meet the voice actor for kid Obito. So. There's that.

[pappydaddy]

Obx anon here lmao I hope you're not sick of me. 😭😂

I definitely agree the whole Kie vs her parents arc was very badly handled bc it made her seem more ungrateful than she probably is. I just really couldn't stand her this season, I mean she wasn't my fav character to begin with she definitely already had those moments in S1. I mean she was 80% annoyed with something this season sooo... 💀

I'm kinda surprised that so many ship her with JJ bc I got the impression from her she's rather their friend than be romantically interested in any of them. Like she mostly acts annoyed around JJ, for example in S2ep10 when they both stayed together in the ship container she literally rolled her eyes at him while saying "now it's only us" , so I'm sorry I can't really get on board with this when 85% of their interactions are like this. Or maybe it's just me because I love JJ so much and I think he deserves better idk please don't come for me. 😭 I can totally see her in a relationship outside the friend group plus it's super weird if she would go through every guy in her circle idk. The entire Pope thing was so unnecessary and I still hate her for playing him like that.

Dude I'm way too invested in this show I basically binged the entire thing in two days bc I refused to watch it until this year. I already knew this would happen based on the things I saw on the Internet and I didn't want to add another fictional white boy to my list of characters I'm hopelessly in love with, but here I am daydreaming about JJ Maybank like I predicted a year ago. 🙃🤦🏻‍♀️💀 (might fuck around and start writing fanfics for him bc I can't help myself)

Definitely a highlight of this season was JJ stealing a fucking ambulance bc ofc he would. Like he's so loyal to his friends my heart can't handle this 😭❤️ He definitely has Steve Harrington energy another white boy who stole my heart 😂🙃 I wish both would get more development as normal characters and are not treated as punching bags (literally) and comic relief characters.

I can't wait for season 3 and how this entire thing ends (I heard there will be only three seasons so correct me if I'm wrong). How the fuck will they escape from the island and when will the Camerons finally face the consequences for their actions? 🙃😬

Of course I'm not sick of you lovely! I love when you guys interact with me like this!

I get what you mean, I feel like the situation between Kie and her parents was handled poorly on both their parts, but I feel like Kie's faults were a bit (teeny) more excusable as she is a teen who thought her best friends had died and then had her parents tell her she couldn't hang out with her friends anymore. But overall, aside from her situation with her parents, Kie did annoy me in both seasons. I really hope in season three, there is more character development for her because she is a good character and has strong morals, but I just feel like she's a bit lost in herself. Which is a big reason I don't like her and JJ together. I just feel like they both have such strong personalities and they would only draw out the worst in each other. I also picked up on the things you pointed out about Kie acting annoyed with JJ and that's another reason I feel like they wouldn't be a good match romantically - more like a brother/sister kinda match would be better I feel. For next season, I would love for Kie to find another person outside of the main circle as well, I feel like that would not only be good for her character development, but it would be interesting for the plot since she is usually the person who doesn't like new people joining the group. And I know I said this before, but it would be great if she was LGBTQ+ because I feel like the writers could incorporate her past behaviours and such into the internalized anger she felt towards herself for being part of the LGBTQ+ because I feel like that is something many people in the community still battle internally about even if they are accepting and I know that a lot of bi people still deal with those feelings (spoken from experience).

My take on the Pope/Kie thing was that Kie knew she didn't like Pope that way. And even if, for a second, she thought she might like him that way, when he stopped her before they had sex expressing how he didn't want to do it if there was a possibility that it would mess up their friendship - she should have respected that and maybe they could have felt the relationship out a bit more before going all in. Especially because it was Pope's first time. I love Kie, I really do, I know it doesn't seem like it from this post, but I feel like the writers aren't doing her character justice. Just like Greys Anatomy destroyed Izzie's character.

Also, don't worry, I binged the entirety of season 2 in one day. Nonstop. I laid in bed for ~10 hours just watching the show because I worked 8 hours the next day and I knew I was gonna be too tired when I got home to watch it and I needed to finish it for my sanity. When I first started watching, I knew JJ was gonna be someone I fell in love with because he is the type I usually fall for, so I tried really hard to fight against it, but I am a white man's whore so I ended up losing. But Pope is my baby, I want to protect him and just save him from everything so it's not just JJ who I am in love with from the show. IF YOU START WRITING FOR JJ PLEASE SEND ME THE FICS I WOULD LOVE TO SUPPORT YOU! I ALSO HAVE A HARD TIME FINDING FICS BECAUSE THEY NEVER COME ACROSS MY DASH SO!

BUT 100%, START WRITING FOR JJ, THERE IS NOT NEARLY ENOUGH OBX CONTENT ANYMORE! YOU WOULD BE AWESOME, TRUST ME, YOU HAVE A REALLY GOOD SENSE ABOUT THE CHARACTERS FOR JUST WATCHING THE ENTIRE SERIES IN TWO DAYS! IF YOU NEED ANY HELP REACH OUT!

And JJ def gives off more chaotic Steve vibes. Loyal, a little dumb sometimes, his heart in the right place, crappy parents, etc. It's pretty much a dead match. Even in between last season and this season, JJ had a lot of character development. He seemed more calm this season, he wasn't getting in fights every episodes. But, I agree, both characters def need more character development and to be beat up less.

I haven't heard anything about them being signed on for more seasons yet, so I'm not sure how many seasons there are going to be. But saying as though it's still in the top 10 and lot of people are streaming it, I feel hopeful that Netflix isn't gonna just cancel it like they love to do. I have a feeling that they might sign on for more than three seasons if the actors are willing (hopefully) since it is such a popular show.

I think they will probably pick up next season with a search being conducted, but I have a sneaking suspicion that Pope will figure a way to get them off or lure help to them. Maybe the coast guard will stumble upon them or Pope will do some cool shit to send a distress signal to them. But since this show is really realistic when it comes to the privileges that rich, powerful, white men hold, I have a sneaking suspicion that Rafe and Ward won't face the consequences for their actions, especially not if Rose continues to help them.

But, please, oh please, start writing for JJ and send me your fics, I would love to read them and support you! I started this blog and writing my fics just because I wanted to try my hand at them, but I also didn't want them cluttering up from drive. I just had so many ideas swirling around my head and I needed a place to put them. I have not regretted the decision to start this blog. It's been the best year. I found so many great people who are supportive, I found followers who are supportive and put up with my randomness and my rants about my life and family. If you need any help getting started, never hesitate to reach out. I would be glad to help you even if you just need a hype man.

[nabilfekir]

below is a long ass paris saint-germain post-ucl thoughts essay

to start.....im not even mad that we’re out....im mad that they didn’t even fucking try. after the first leg (in which the same old story of “we crumbled” plays on), they all came out on social media asking for supporters to be there on march 6th and the supporters were there, the supporters showed up.....but where the fuck were they? where the fuck was the team??? they asked for our support, we gave it and what did they give us in return? the same old bullshit we get every year. i didn’t see “warriors” on that pitch. i saw a bunch of pussyholes and cowards (excuse my language). 

the only players i give credit to are areola and thiago silva, the rest were shocking. i’m so fucking disappointed to be honest. they all cried out on instagram for supporters not to give up and then they go and visibly give up on the pitch, give up on the biggest stage in club football for everyone to watch. fucking shameful. even if we don’t go through at least WIN the game at home, or even at least give it your fucking all to the 90th minute plus stoppage time. that’s the least we ask of them.

now key parts of our team will be looking for the exit door in the summer and they’ll think they weren’t the problem but this was a loss they all participated in as a team...everyone on that pitch but areola n o monstro. the rest of the team all has to eat a big ass piece of that L pie. they don’t get to think they’re better than this team bc absolutely none of them proved that on the pitch. the exit door is open for those who want to leave - marco i love u but every summer its the same shit with rumors and this past summer u crossed a line so if you want to leave bye see ya bc i’ve had enough. draxler can go too, him and his fans like to think he’s better than the team but i can count on one hand the amount of good games he’s had this season when we give him the chance to prove himself. if neymar wants to go m*drid please do, i’d love to have the spotlight off of us but know they’ll have to pay 444m aka double we paid for him lmao fuck yall if you think you’re gonna get his ass at any price less than wtf we paid for him bet on that. idc to keep him against his will but we’re sure as hell not gonna record a 222m loss so if they want him, pay up. rabiot can go too, if he wants to go to the prem then let him, he’s also been hinting at thinking he’s too good for us and he’s free to go and prove that somewhere else. cavani looks like his foot is out the door and his service to this club was greatly appreciated but since he broke ibra’s record he’s looked distracted and disinterested and he’s been in the media saying he wants to win the copa lib so let him go back to argentina if thats what he wants. let timothy weah work his way into this team and see if he can be a good striker for us.

on that topic......i am desperate for us to use our academy better. as most big european clubs, the path from academy to first team has gotten harder to follow but i don’t want that for us. i don’t want us to be ch*lsea loaning out or our youth like cattle to make us money or whatever and never giving them a shot at the first team but then they go somewhere else become a star and we sit there looking like idiots. if they’re good, give them a shot, especially if we wrap up the league soon, why not give some of them a TRY at the very least? 20-15 minutes at the end of a game at least? we only used tim weah bc we were trying to rest for real m*drid, otherwise it never would’ve happened. how long has nkunku been in the squad but he still mostly comes on as a sub in the 80th minute, and kimpembe needs to start being utilized more before he decides to leave because thiago at this point must be eyeing retirement. presnel is an amazing player and has psg in his blood and would fight for the shirt and this team more than any player on that pitch. we need to start making better use of our academy period point blank. our youth team captain yacine adli is being eyed up by clubs like m*n city b*yern b*rcelona ars*nal but hasn’t gotten a single look in with us and tbh i think he’ll probably leave and that will be another talented prospect leaving our academy without having played for us. and watch he becomes a great midfielder meanwhile we pay out our ass to buy one from some club.

anyone who wants to leave the team, let them. anyone who thinks they’re better than the team, sell them. let’s give our titis parisiens a shot in this team and keep a low profile, i’m tired of making a public entertainment show of ourselves for everyone to keep an eye on, we bring too much attention to ourselves and that heightens everyone’s expectations for us in the ucl, which we’re destined to fall short of.

the coach........lord have mercy we need this man gone in the summer. we have to bring in a coach with champions league experience if we’re really trying to build a project to win it. it was stupid to keep him on after last year anyway with having been embarrassed in the ucl and on top of that come second in the league. i’m still baffled how nasser let that happen. and even more stupid was to think a coach who won the europa league a couple of times could give us glory in a competition at a much higher level than that. he’s a europa league manager and that’s his level and will always be his level, it’s time to let him go. he’s fallen below expectations way too many times. get a manager with ucl experience either winning it or at least having been to a final, a manager with a personality and tenacity and fight to give this team a better mentality.

our biggest problem is that our mentality is weak as shit. we have a team capable of getting far in the ucl - strong players, technical players, talented players! - but our mentality when the going gets rough or when there’s a little bit of pressure???? disgraceful and disgusting and embarrassing. i’d back a ligue 2 team to beat us if they really fought for it, the same way rc strasbourg beat us earlier in the season, the same way ly*n beat us earlier this year, the same way m*rseille was a free kick in the last second away from beating us for the first time in 6 years back in october. when a team fights with actual passion and fight....we crumble....and badly, they don’t even have to play well but play with strength and the will the win. its so sad to watch honestly. it’s literally our weakness.

we’re a good team. we went out to a better team. i knew we were out as soon as the draw happened. i knew we weren’t getting past them, despite all the m*drid fans being fucking dramatic about it. the back to back ucl winners? it doesn’t matter what kind of form they’re in, they were going to beat us. there was no question of it, as if it their team wasn’t going to show up on the biggest stage? when they have nothing else but the ucl to fight for? it was never going to be easy and we got knocked out by the literal title holders. we didn’t get an easy draw, or even a moderate one, in fact we got probably the hardest draw, i dont care what m*drid fans or anyone else has to say about that.

but again....it’s not about the fact that we got knocked out - we got knocked out by the current uefa champions league champions! that’s nothing to be embarrassed of - but it’s HOW we got knocked out, thats the embarrassing part. no fight no passion no goddamn BALLS. when it was time to stand up and be counted and show we’re more than a “money team”.....we didn’t. any criticism that comes our way now, we invited upon ourselves. we didn’t need to buy neymar to win the champions league lmao, that wasn’t the solution whatsoever.

our team last year but with a fighting spirit would be better than our current team this year (with neymar) but with our weak mentality.

if we had fighting spirit and passion and the willingness to get dirty and play hard and fight for our lives on THIS VERY DAY last year against uefalona, we might have made it through then, we wouldn’t have won it, but at least gotten through to the next round despite the ref’s utter bullshit.

anyway i’m not even hurt about the game anymore. i’m more worried about how this will affect our season, but even more so i’m worried about what will happen to us in the summer when verratti, rabiot, cavani and more will be wanting to leave.

at this point this team HAS AND I MEAN HAS to do a domestic treble (EDIT: it would be a quadruple i guess cuz we won the trophée de champions at the beginning of the season against m*naco).....like anything less is a big fat fucking failure of a season. the cup final against m*naco.....i mean now i’m worried that if m*naco turn up and really fight for it, we’re probably still going to be licking our wounds from this match and lose. and i really need us to beat them for mbappé’s sake lmao.

anyway this team truly disrespected the fans that night (again! second year in a row!) and i’m hurt and fuck the champions league fuck both teams from that night and fuck emery.