#i love fish dragons so much they just didn’t have enough genes for me

[mawsmauls]

Bleed dry a heart of bloody stone. This is all you were ever meant to be; still you mourn.

Com for Loreshark

[mischiefandspirits]

Parental Bonding: Courtship

S01-E02, part 1 of 2: Danny figures out a new power, gets a date, and lands himself in trouble. Not in that order.

Last time on Living Phantom ~ Next time on Living Phantom

Warning: Implied/Referenced Sibling Abuse (Not onscreen, skip to the bottom for a full description)

Danny came down the stairs, ready to send the annoying Box Ghost back where he came from then spend the next few hours trying to block out what happened at lunch with some mindless video game violence. He paused when he spotted his dad sitting in front of the portal with a fishing rod in hand. He was wearing his fishing vest and had a soda guzzler attached to his fishing hat, sucking at the straw as he watched the swirling green mists.

The half-ghost frowned and tossed his backpack off to the side. “Hey, Dad. What are you doing?”

“Danny, keep it down. You'll scare away the ghosts,” he whispered. He pointed at the rod and Danny realized the line was glowing. “It's the Fenton Ghost Fisher. I'm fishing for ghosts. Check out this line. Coated with a special high-tensile ectoplasmic resin that ghosts can't break.” He focused back on the portal. “Quiet now. Don't wanna spook 'em.”

Danny nodded and turned to leave. He’d have to get rid of Boxy later.

“Whoa! That soda goes right through you like Sherman through Georgia.” His dad suddenly grabbed his shoulder and shoved the rod into his hands. “Here! Hang on to this. I'll be right back after I use the Fenton Urinal.”

Did not need to know that, Danny sighed. Well, at least now he could -

The line started pulling and he scrambled for the reel. The line went taut, then slack.

“Oh no,” he muttered, his breath misting in front of him.

A large claw emerged from the portal, then another. They hooked around the edge as a reptilian snout poked through. It seemed to squeeze through the too-small space as it lengthened and grew into the head of a dragon, electric blue with neon green ear fins and curled horns. It kept coming. First, a barrel chest and wings that didn’t look big enough to carry its weight -- though Danny was pretty sure a ghost dragon didn’t actually need wings to fly -- then forelegs, hind legs, and finally a whip-like tail.

It’s red eyes glared down at him, the end of the fisher caught in its mouth.

Danny flinched back, then his eyes caught on a glimpse of green in the corner of his eye. He looked down and frowned when he realized the dragon’s scales were littered with glowing soot and quite a few claw marks cut into its flesh, dripping ectoplasm that fizzled into nothing before it hit the floor.

“Woah, what attacked you?”

The dragon roared and Danny scrambled back. “I want to go!” it growled, grabbing him in its foreclaw. “I have to go!”

“You'll have to stand in line behind my dad,” Danny joked, then immediately wondered if ghosts could use the bathroom.

Did full ghosts need to eat? Would they eat normal food or ectoplasmic stuff? Would ghost food be closer to his parents' cooking? Did ghosts accidentally bring their  food to life?

No, focus, Danny! “In the meantime…”

He let his transformation wash over him, then let go of his density, becoming a cloud of ectoplasm that slipped through its grip. It tried to claw at him and he dodged around the hits, then pulled back when it started to breathe fire. He arced around the spray then landed a hit to its neck, right on the golden band of the necklace it wore.

It gave a pained roar as it flew back and hit the wall.

Danny flew closer, ready to shove it back into the portal, but it suddenly began to shimmer. It shrunk until it took the form of a young woman. She looked to be in much better health than her dragon form, though there was a darker patch on her green cheek that might have been a burn. The ghost looked up at him with tears in her eyes. “All I wanted was to go to the Princess Costume Ball. And my brother won't let me!”

She started crying and flew into the portal.

Frowning, Danny dropped to the ground and grabbed the fisher. “I hope her brother wasn’t the one that did that to her.”

Footsteps sounded on the stairs and Danny quickly changed back.

His dad came down, new soda cans in hand. “Catch anything?”

“Nope,” he lied and passed his dad the fisher. “I’m going to drop my backpack off in my room then I’m meeting Tucker online for a boss battle.”

“Homework?”

“None today.”

“Alright. Don’t forget, it’s your night for dinner. Jazz has that Debate meeting and your mom won’t be back until Friday.”

“I know. Pizza’s in the oven and timer’s set.”

“Good boy.”

~~~~~~~~~~B~~~~~0~~~~~0~~~~~~~~~~

“Thanks to you, I now know the quickest way to a woman's heart: clean boxers,” Tucker joked as he shut his locker.

Danny glared at him then dropped his head. “Man, are you ever going to let that go. I get it, I blew it yesterday.”

Danny sent Sam a scared look, then walked up to the tree Paulina Sanchez was sitting in front of. He tried to lean against the tree and give his crush a smile like the guys on Tucker’s teen dramas, but his hand turned intangible and he ended up falling to the ground.

“Please! Don't say you've suddenly fallen for me,” the popular girl said in a bored voice, not even looking at him. “That line is so last semester.”

Danny blushed and stood up. “Yeah! I-I mean, no! Th-that's not it. I, uh, I was wondering…”

Suddenly his legs felt cold and the people around them started laughing. His blush grew as he looked down to realize his jeans had fallen to the ground. He scrambled to pick them up as Paulina finally looked at him, only to giggle into her hand.

At least it was boxer day, the last thing he needed was to accidentally be outed by his stupid powers on top of everything else.

“A gentleman usually tips his hat, but I'll give you points for originality,” Paulina said.

Suddenly Sam was at his side, her hand on his arm. “Kudos, Danny. You just set an all-time speed record for drowning in the shallow end of the gene pool.”

Paulina stared at her for a moment, then scowled. “Oh, no! You did not just call me shallow, did you?”

“If you mean do I think I can stand in a puddle full of you and not get my feet wet, then yeah.”

“Shallow? I am not shallow!”

Sam tugged him away from the girl, muttering, “As shallow as a drop of water. Ignore her, Danny. You can do so much better.”

Danny glanced over his shoulder to see the popular glaring at them.

“Paulina probably won't even look at me now.”

“Yoo-hoo, Danny!” Danny turned to see the girl they were discussing walking towards them, a flirty smile on her face.

“Or not! Hey, Tuck?”

“I get it. I'm out. Good luck.” He gave Danny a pat on the back then he was gone.

“Hi, you,” she giggled. “I just wanted to -”

Danny’s world went dark and cramped as he was suddenly shoved into his locker, which closed behind him.

“That’s for throwing your lunch on me last week, runt.”

“It was your lunch and it was an accident,” Danny growled.

“Oh hey, Paulina. Just the girl I was looking for.”

Danny glared at the wall of his locker then turned invisible and intangible. He leaned out of the locker to see Dash smirking down at Paulina, who didn’t look impressed.

“So I was thinking… I’m the top man. All-star quarterback and school hero.”

Danny reached towards the larger boy, ready to pull some ghostly prank, only for his hands to sink through Dash. His eyes widened as he felt his powers draw him in.

“You’re the prettiest girl in school.”

He felt himself shrink infinitesimally small, then expand like a balloon to fit a space that wasn’t quite right.

“It would only make sense if we -”

Danny blinked as he found himself in front of Paulina. He looked down at himself to see he was wearing a letterman's jacket and his arms were bulging with muscles. His eyes widened as he realized he was in Dash’s body.

Wow, a whole new kind of dysphoria.

Thanks, I hate it.

“Hello?” Paulina said, waving her hand in front of his face.

“Oh! Right! Of course!”

Paulina raised an eyebrow.

“I just wanted to tell you that I’m not going to be at the Spring Formal because I’ve got to scrub my mom’s feet that night. I usually do it every night, but she’s going to need some extra time that night. She’s got these massive bunions, you know. Want to see?”

“Eew! Get lost, loser!”

Danny turned and took a few steps, then pulled back his power. Thankfully he dropped out of Dash as he’d hoped and he was able to slip back into his locker just before Paulina opened it to let him out.

“Why do I suddenly feel like scrubbing my mom's feet?” he heard Dash mutter as Danny smiled at the girl.

He tried to step out of his locker, only to fall on his face.

He waited for Paulina to start laughing at him, but instead, she knelt next to him and winked.

“We have to stop meeting like this.” Her eyes widened and she grabbed something that was hanging out of his backpack. “Oh my gosh! What's that?”

Danny sat up and saw she was holding a necklace. It was gold with a short, almost choker-length band and held a smooth green gem that had a dark band down the center. It looked vaguely familiar, but Danny couldn’t place it. “That? Oh! Uh, it's a, uh…” He looked up at her face to see her staring at the necklace, entranced. “You like it?”

“It's beautiful!”

“Hey, that's great!” As they stood up, Danny had a very bad idea. “Because I, uh, got it for you.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I-I-In case I got the nerve to ask you to the Spring Formal and you said yes, I thought I'd want to give you something and that's what it would have been. It's for you.”

Danny felt his powers activate and grabbed his pants before they could slip down more than an inch.

“Whether you go with me or not.”

Paulina eyed him with a teasing smile. “Well, you are kind of cute, and you have great taste in underwear. I'd love to go with you.”

She turned away, slipping on the necklace.

He gave a happy sigh, then frowned. “What am I doing? That thing doesn't belong to me. It could be my mom's, or Jazz's.”

“Bye, Danny. See you!”

“Or I could worry about that later. Because she said yes! Woohoo!” He threw his hands up, remembering his pants a second too late.

“Pantless again, Mr. Fenton?” Mr. Lancer asked, walking up behind him.

~~~~~~~~~~B~~~~~0~~~~~0~~~~~~~~~~

“Catch anything, Dad?” Danny asked as he shuffled up behind where his dad was once more in his fishing chair, Fenton Ghost Fisher in hand.

“Son, I couldn't catch a cold. I've been sitting here all day without a single bite.”

Danny hummed and looked down at the slip Lancer had given him. Apparently having your pants accidentally fall down twice was an offense worthy of having your parents called in so now his dad needed to meet with Mr. Lancer in an hour. Well, at least there was only one parent home to get mad.

He took a deep and held up the slip. “Da-”

“I'm so frustrated I want to take out my rage on the first person who gives me bad news.” His dad adjusted his line with a growl. “Anyway, you wanted to tell me something?”

Danny flinched. “Well, sort of. Mr. Lancer -”

His dad stiffened. “Mr. Lancer what? Is this bad news?”

“Mr. Lancer -” An idea hit him and he smirked. He turned intangible and dove into his dad. “- wants to have a word with us!”

~~~~~~~~~~B~~~~~0~~~~~0~~~~~~~~~~

Pan_Fried69: Are you out yet

Pan_Fried69: How’d it go are you grounded

EcoAce13: I still can’t believe lancer got on you for your pants. How is that your fault!? It’s not like you pulled them down!

Transplanetary: I’m out. Didn’t get in trouble

Pan_Fried69: Sweet

Pan_Fried69: How’s you manage that

Transplanetary: New problem tho

Transplanetary: MY DAD convinced lancer it was because I don’t eat enough and he actually bought it

EcoAce13: What new problem?

EcoAce13: Wait. Danny, tell me you didn’t!!!!!!

Pan_Fried69: Didn’t what

Transplanetary: Mayhaps

EcoAce13: DANNY!!!!!!

Pan_Fried69: What’d he do

Transplanetary: I might have possessed my dad a little

Transplanetary: And by a little I mean for the whole meeting so he doesn’t even know it happened

Pan_Fried69: Nice!!!

Pan_Fried69: Can you do that to my dad the next time I get in trouble

Pan_Fried69: Better yet can you get me a date

EcoAce13: No, not nice! You can’t just take a persons Drew I’ll away from than!

Transplanetary: Forget it. You can get your own date for the dance like I did

Pan_Fried69: Drew I’ll?

EcoAce13: Free will. Wtf autocorrect?

Transplanetary: Drew I’ll

Transplanetary: And trust me I’m paying for it

Pan_Fried69: What happened

Transplanetary: Lancer asked Dad to chaperon the dance and would take no for an answer

Transplanetary: *wouldnt

Pan_Fried69: Guys problema giant ghost dragon at mall!!!!!

Transplanetary: OMW

EcoAce13: Why are you at the mall?

Pan_Fried69: All the hot people are here

Pan_Fried69: There’s a big sale at Abyss and some football star is signing stuff at Sports Victors

Pan_Fried69: Danny’s fighting the ghost

EcoAce13: So you mean all the brain dead people are there.

EcoAce13: How’s he doing?

Pan_Fried69: He just got knocked into weenie on a skewer

Pan_Fried69: Then calles himself a weenie

EcoAce13: Figures, the idiot.

Pan_Fried69: At least he’s got a date unlike us

EcoAce13: Maybe if I was as pretty as PAULINA. 🙄

Pan_Fried69: The ghost just disappeared

Transplanetary: I don’t know where it went, but that’s the second time I’ve fought it. We need to investigate

EcoAce13: Are you okay?

Transplanetary: Also why are you so down on Paulina? So she’s pretty, it’s not a crime

Transplanetary: I’m fine

EcoAce13: Looks are de icing, Danny.

EcoAce13: *deceiving

Pan_Fried69: Great now if only I could get a date

Pan_Fried69: Well then

Pan_Fried69: Apparently the dragon and Danny were a prank using smoke and a projector

EcoAce13: You’ve got to be kidding me

Pan_Fried69: They just made an announcement ove the intercom

Transplanetary: Trust me people will make as many excuses as possible to avoid admitting ghosts are real

Pan_Fried69: How would projections even do all that stuff

Transplanetary: No clue

~~~~~~~~~~B~~~~~0~~~~~0~~~~~~~~~~

The Amulets of Aragon

The Amulets come from a Spanish tale about a noble family residing within the medieval Kingdom of Aragon who attempted to usurp the King. Wanting the crown for himself, the lord asked his sister to use witchcraft to create two amulets that would allow them to transform themselves into powerful dragons. The king learned what was to happen and had his knights storm the lord’s manor. The knights captured the lord and lady before the amulets could be completed and the two were burned as witches.

The King’s victory was short-lived, however, as the two nobels returned as vengeful spirits. What they failed in life, they accomplished in death as upon their necks were the amulets the brother had longed for. Together the spirits burned the king’s castle to the ground in a storm of blue and green flames.

The legend goes on to say that any who stole the amulets from the lord or lady could gain their power, but they would have no control over it. They would be captives to their distress or anger and lash out blindly.

“Are you sure this is what we’re looking for?” Tucker asked, looking over the webpage. “Just sounds like some fairytale.”

“No, I think she’s onto something, look at the pictures,” Danny said and Tucker opened the gallery.

The first few pictures were medieval art of similar-looking black and purple dragons; though none seemed to be able to agree if it had bat or bird-like wings, scales or feathers, two or four legs, and ears or horns. Those were followed by more dragons, these blue and green. These were just as mismatched, but even then…

“Okay, the blue one kind of looks like your ghost dragon.”

“And Danny said the ghost looked medieval and mentioned her brother right?” Sam pointed out.

“Huh, that's the amulet I gave to Paulina. It must have accidentally fallen into my backpack. Wait. You mean… I'm going on a date with a dragon?” Danny gasped.

Tucker scrolled down to see pictures of the amulets. The stone settings looked the same, though one was on a long chain while the other had a collar band. The latter looked just like the necklace Paulina had been wearing the past two days.

Sam gave a snort. “Like I said, looks are deceiving. I'm sure you two will have a wonderful evening at the dance.”

“Thanks,” Danny deadpanned.

Suddenly Danny sent him a text.

Tucker gave his friend a confused look, but opened it.

👻Boo Boy: She really wants to go to the dance

Me: But she says she doesn’t want to

👻Boo Boy: Were her best friends

“What are you going to do to stop her?” Sam asked.

👻Boo Boy: We should have known

Me: Well there’s nothing we can do about it now right

“There’s no way you can just ask for the necklace back,” Tucker said, “not without a good reason.”

Me: Right

Me: Danny

When Danny didn’t reply, Tucker looked up at the video chat.

Danny was giving him a smirk.

Me: No way forget it ABSOLUTELY NOT NO

“Maybe I can say it’s a family heirloom?” Danny suggested.

👻Boo Boy: Tuck

Me: I just found out Kwan bailed on Valerie

Me: VALERIE

Me: She’s like a luster adjacent

“But then why would you have given it away?" Sam said.

Me: If I act fast I can catch her on the rebound

👻Boo Boy: Come on Tuck

Me: You come on

Me: Why don’t you just take her

“I don’t know! Ugh!” Danny groaned.

👻Boo Boy: What part of “going on a date with a dragon” didn’t you get? Paulinas likely to scorch the town if I bail on her

Me: Plus it’s Paulina

👻Boo Boy: I mean yeah that too but that’s not what’s important right now

Me: Uh huh 🤔

👻Boo Boy: I’m serious Tuck

👻Boo Boy: Do it for Sam

Tucker tried to give Danny an annoyed look, only to find his friend giving him puppy eyes.

Abort! Abort! He tried to look away, but it was too late.

Me: This is so unfair!!!!!!!

Danny smiled quickly then glanced over his shoulder. “Oh, I think I hear Jazz calling me. We can talk more later. See you guys!”

And he was gone.

“Well bye,” Sam said, rolling her eyes. “I should probably go too.”

“Wait, Sam,” he called before she could end the call. He glanced down at his phone, Valerie’s twitter still open on the app’s tab, and sighed. “I was wondering since neither of us have dates, do you want to go as friends? It’d be better than just sitting around at home. Plus, we can make fun of Danny and his dragon date.”

Sam frowned and glanced to the side. “Uh, I don't know. This is so last minute. And I do have plans, and -”

Tucker perked up. “If you don’t want to -”

“Okay, but only because you couldn’t get a date. Might as well put that lame dress my parents bought me to use. Tell Danny I’ll take care of transportation for us four. I need to make some appointments. See you tomorrow!” Sam said quickly before she ended the call.

Tucker blinked then slumped back with a groan. He closed Twitter and texted Danny.

Me: Sam’s parents are driving us to the dance

~~~~~~~~~~B~~~~~0~~~~~0~~~~~~~~~~

I had fun with the trio's chat names and Danny's contact. I'm still unsure about Sam's chat name, but the next best idea I had was AsexuWhale and a pun like that didn't feel right for her.

Warning Description: Dora is described as being beaten up and it’s hinted that her brother was the one who did it. It's rather minor, but I felt it necessary to list just in case.

[cultgambles]

Nature’s Alfredo Sauce

I saw @wtffanfiction ‘s post on weird words to describe genitals...

and my friend dared me to write something with 100 of the words haha. there’s 108 in here i think.

i dont even know.

Word Count: 1317

It was 10:30 at night, the angel lay in her bed without a care in the world. Well, she did have one care: the human that she called with such sweet words earlier that day had not shown up at the time they agreed upon. They were supposed to be boinking about now. A little bit of horizontal monster mash, one could say. 30 minutes past ten, she was quite bored. There was nothing interesting on TV to sate her being, and nothing worth listening to or reading. She couldn’t even muster up any dirty thoughts to swipe at her tainted jewel.

Ugh.

Until...a knock at her door.

Begrudgingly, she got up, using her wings to carry her the short distance to the door. Lazy. Peeking through the peephole, she saw her human standing there, a bouquet of yellow and red roses gripped tightly in his hands. She opened the door slowly, and he gave a sheepish smile.

“Sorry I’m late,” he said, “the dinner party ran super late.”

“It’s fine. As long as you do what you intended to do before.”

“I do!” he beamed, suddenly his pocket rocket becoming throbbing manliness tenting in the cotton prison of his pants. “I brought it just for you, my lance of love, for my love!”

“Ohhhh!” She crooned, her velvet underground becoming moist as he advanced toward her. Her pleasure pearl throbbed with need, as their mouths were on each other in an instant, tongues battling for dominance. He kicked the door behind him, scooping his angel into his arms and carrying her towards the bedroom. Her legs gripped his hips, and she could feel his coke bottle cock poking her hershey highway. He THREW her on the bed, shoving his shirt off, marveling at the way her eyes drank up his well defined chest. She crawled towards him on all fours, pressing her slender fingers around his MIGHTY MAN NOODLE, feeling its rigidness stiffen even more, massaging the orbs. “Do you like when I touch your organ? Your fuck stem, organic crotch gun, diego the explorer--”

“I know you’re trying to hit 100 words but that’s a little overkill,” the man frowned. “You can just say sperminator and go.”

“It’s hard, just like your engorged staff. It’s gotten so big and thicc I don’t know if it will fit in my haynannernanners at all…” She opened her mouth, licking the veins along the underside of his doggy lipstick. 

“Oh that feels so good on my pulsing manmeat. This bulging soldier boy is gonna wreck your triangular area so gud beby.”

“I can’t wait,” she moaned, the DNA rifle still in her mouth, sending pleasures of vibration to the man’s brain. She swirled the tip of the holy wand, and the man groaned, digging his fingers in her long long hair. After a few more languid licks and sucks, his horrible wet mushroom was SQUIZRTING SOME BABY BATTER RIGHT INTO HER MOUTH.

“Urg,” he moaned. 

“Aaaa,” she moaned back, milking the last few drops from his peenie weenie. His fuckfluid was very salty, like he had a bad diet. As soon as she popped off of him, iT (God’s pinky finger) WAS ROCK HARD AGAIN. She couldnt wait to get that cherry assassin deep in her damp canal of lust. 

“Lay back,” the man said gruffly, kneeling to his knees. His tongue found purchase on her love nubbin, his fish pole fingers making their way to her weeping folds.

“Ur so wet for me beby...just for me and my giant sausage,” he groaned into her love pocket. 

“Yes! Only for u, my man with the love tool! I never met anyone with a better male organism than u.”

“Really? You mean that? No one’s got a better you-know-what than me?”

“I mean it b. Hurry up now, my letter o be gettin dry over here,” the angel rolled her eyes. 

“Oh yeah,” he said, returning to the attack on her valve. Suddenly, he detached from her clam cavern, his man-carrot spewing thick, hot princely milk all over the bed. “Your slit of ecstasy tastes so good.”

Damn, she thought to herself, I wasn’t even close. If his mauve avenger didn’t do the job, she would play with her kitty later after he fell asleep.

He snaked up to her, pressing hot fingers to her love pillows, pinching the rosebuds. “Was that good?”

“Yes,” she lied.

“Now it’s time for my pink stiff flobberworm. In your jewelry box.” (His crimson bird was hard for like the 3rd time). 

“Yeah, I think my vagoo would love that.”

The man sat up, pulling the angel above his lap, over the one-eyed snake so her mayonnaise drain was directly in place to slide in easily. She sank down on the mayonnaise cannon, filling her up deliciously. 

“Oh, babe, your communism stick is in my chamber of secrets so deep and good.” The angel readjusted herself, bracing her hands against his shoulders as she started to move her hips up and down his beef bazooka. His burrito, in fact, was so big she couldn’t even fit all of him in her moist core. COo.

She gave a sudden moan as the hungry dragon hit that sweet sweet geronimo spot deep inside her. 

“Oh, ur tube flute game is so much better than your mouth frickle frackle. Yesssss daddy just like that,” she whined at the end. “SO good in my pleasure casino.”

“Baby, u feel so good on my kryptonian meat.” he gripped her anal fortress with such vigor, it was sure to leave small crecrents. He took a mythical berry in his mouth, teeth grazing the sensitive spot of her fun bags as his hips rose up to meet hers. He POUNDED into her at inhuman speeds, the angel groaning with every pump of his muatra. 

He liked watching his dark spire go in and out from her forbidden fruit, the way his crown jewels slapped her poop cavern harshly every time.

“Do you like your formerly caged viper meeting my downstairs mouth?!” she purred.

“Yeah looks great. Feels great. Must be mine.” (why did i think of p!atd emperor's new clothes??)

Soon, but not soon enough, the angel felt a tight knot in her belly. 

The tell tale signs of an orgasm (surprised they didn't have another word for it). It hit her like a tonne of bricks as she threw her head back in ecstasy, her chest balls bouncing from the force. Each in a different direction, just like anime girl tiddies. She was wrecked.

The man felt her penis trap tighten as her walls squeezed his hairy wolf dingaling. A few more thrusts of his hips had his hardened arousal squirt his liquid love deep in her man muncher, quickly turning it into a cave with honey.

They both moaned wantonly, so loudly that the neighbors were probably also getting off from their wonderful time of bumbin uglies.

He pulled out of her cum dumpster, his love muscle flopping against his belly, still leaking spaff a bit. 

The angel flopped over next to him, feeling warm pale liquid seep out of her egg chamber onto the bed.

“Your midnight meat train never ceases to amaze me. Like why is it so big and so good?”

“Good genes I guess,” he laughed, “but your woman-tomato is givin me a run for my money.”

“That was fun, you can come use your mighty sword of eros in my cock garage again.”

“Can I use my sugar quill in your fart factory next time?” He asked, batting his eyelashes. 

“Sure, why not. Only if I get to peg your man pussy too. So it’s even.”

She laughed, pressing rumblr spheres (and subsequently naked body) on his person, hugging him close. Of course, his thingy became restless manmeat ready for action in 5 seconds flat.

“Another round of belly magic?”

[kpopisthereasonihavenolife]

Hold Your Breath

BTS

Kim Taehyung/Reader [F]

Genre: Drabble, Sea Prince AU

Words: 1.4k

Your leg’s burned.  Just how much farther were they going to chase you?  You’ve done nothing wrong, it wasn’t your fault.  The fault was in the law and its unjust ways.  Who forbade humans from coming into contact with the greater life forms of the vast, open seas?  It’s simply unfair.

The sea was beautiful and the life under was even more so.  From the plants, microscopic organisms, wildlife of water and the humanoid people of the sea. Some think they’re merfolk.  Some still refuse they exist; simply a prolonged state of mass hysteria.  Those folk, are the real fools.  You know better, you’ve befriended one after all; a boy of the waves.

He gorgeous.  Hair a shade deeper than the sea’s blue shine.  Eyes a bright cerulean that shimmer like dragon tear stones.  Skin covered and glimmering with scales and gills. His scales covered his forearms and highlighted his cheeks.  Gills lined him ribs covering his lungs.

You see, those people of the sea aren’t completely inhuman.  They have human organs that melded with sealife traits and genes. Some say they first came to be when an ancient witch was killed, executed by waterboard.  They say she left behind a curse on her village, cursing them with the ironic fate of flooding the village until it was nothing but a massive body of water.  Only to enchant her once people in spite of her death.

His people were an oddity.  Primarily living in the water, but able to walk on land as well; however, not for too long as they would dry up on land.  He didn’t have a tail of a mermaid, but 2 separate legs of a man.  Webbed toes and scaled ankles and scattered scales all up his legs and thighs.  His arms were toned and strong, finger slender and nails long and sharp.  His teeth sharper than sharks, yet at bright and white a pearls.

His naked body was covered only in a single cloth that his people were able to enchant and weave together under the surface. A special kind of material that wouldn’t succumb to ocean currents and still offer protection of the finer jewels so to speak. Shells and shark teeth hung around his neck in a thread and a fish hook pierced ironically through his earlobe. He was a beautiful man of the waves.

Taehyung was the beautiful prince of the kingdom below the surface.

You’ve never had the liberty of seeing his home, but you were fortunate enough to see him for the first time a year ago. Turns out, when you decided to explore a cover that is only accessible when the tide is low, you would stumble upon the unsuspecting prince. He nearly took you out on an impulse of a fight or flight instinct.

Grabbing your shoulder and pinning you to the ground, he rolled over you.  His azure hair dangling from his forehead and scraping yours.  His glowing eyes piercing straight through you, sharping than his fishhook earring.

You, of course, did the one thing any human vulnerable in this current situation would do.  You opened your mouth and you screamed.

The man above you panicked as he quickly covered your mouth.  He hissed in your face to shush you.

“Be quiet, human!” You pushed your face forward to bite his hand, causing him to jump off you and shake it around.  Seething as he watched the reddening teeth marks appear on his hand.  He looked incredibly up to you.  “You- you bit me?!”

“It’s only fair!”

“How in the ocean waves is that fair?!”

“You attacked me?! Hellooo!”

“I didn’t attack you!”

“Right, because throwing a girl to the ground is such a friendly ‘hello, how are you’!”

“It was reflexive, okay?!”

“Whatever, Fishboy.” He gasped.

“That’s low, even for a human.”

“Okay, fine.  I take it back... Fishman.”

“HEY!”

It’s hard to believe that that one interaction has blossomed so greatly in just a single year.  Over time, you and Taehyung met in secret nearly every night by now.

Taehyung was a storyteller.  He was born to weave and tell tales, you swore it was in his blood.  He’d tell you all sorts of miraculous folktales, some true some not, but he’d never tell you which was what.  He’d never tell you the difference between the truths and the falsehoods.  He taught you the language of his people, his culture and his love of his home.

In turn, you answered any questions he had about humans the world about the surface. He wasn’t aware though, that it was against the law to interact with his kind.  You had been breaking the law for so long, so he tried to convince you- for your sake- to stop meeting him.  But, no matter what, you’d always wait for him to show up.  It had already been 6 months by then, you were already in too deep.

After the last year, you felt like you’d never get caught and could stay with Taehyung like this.  However, doesn’t the coin of the universe just love to flip?  You were woken up one morning by rude bangings on your front door.

Ambling to your door, you peek out the peephole and cover your small gasp with your palm.  The police, two men.  You stood, unable to move for the longest time until they hammered their arm against your door again.  You jolted as you looked around.

Maybe they didn’t want to arrest you.  Maybe they didn’t know about Taehyung. Maybe they only wanted to ask you a few questions about something. Those pitiful thoughts flew out the window as you peeked one more time to see a pair of handcuffs in one man’s hand and overheard them talking about ‘this arrest’. So, you fled.

Jumping out your furthest back window, you ran towards the direction of the sea.  Feet bare, shorts on your hips and a loose tank top with no support of any kind underneath.  You were too panicked to be embarrassed about your braless torso at the moment. You had little time to run for your freedom- for your life.  Even if you got caught, you didn’t care.  You just wanted to see Taehyung again.  Just one more time at least.  

You soon heard the two men chase behind you.  You turned corners and ran allies in hope of losing them.  Though you gained distance, you never lost hem completely.  Just your luck.  Soon you ran into the sandy beach and collapsed into the shore.  Waves crashing against your knees as you heaved and gasped for air.

You gained a lead in the chase somehow.  It was your only chance.  Now.

“Taehyung!” You screamed out into the deafening ocean.  “Taehyung!”  Another scream causing you to choke.  He had to show up.  It was now or never again.  Please, just once more..!

He never showed like you so wished.  You stared sorrowfully into the distance when you heard those bad men after you again, gaining up on you.  You clicked your tongue and picked yourself up, taking off again.  Running along the shore, heading to one more area to try.

You’d never met him in the open before, so maybe he just wasn’t around.  He couldn’t hear you, so you needed to go somewhere further out. Somewhere the ocean sat under.  You needed to go into the water without getting wet.

Your feet sunk into the wet sand kicking it up with your heels with each forceful nudge forward and soon you came to a dock.  A small pier reaching out in the water, far from the swimming beach. Perfect for fishermen.  You ran along the wood to the end of the dock and took a deep breath.

“Taehyung!”  You cupped around your mouth and yelled.  Your voice cracked and you coughed.  Tired, out of breath and nowhere to go.  You spun around with your back to the sea to face the two men who had been pursuing you.

“You’ve already made this harder than it needs to be.  Just give up Sea Talker.” That’s what the illegal action of communication with the ocean was called: Sea Talking.

“What’s so bad about reaching beyond humanity?  What kind of ignorant morons do you have to be to deny them life!” Before the men could advance to restrain you, the ocean added oddly.  

Water rose violently on the dock, threatening only the men.  You then felt someone behind you, pulling you backward.  They moved to your front and came close to your ear.

“Hold your breath,” Taehyung instructed right before he wrapped his arm around your waist and dove in the ocean.  

Both he and you, disappearing into the sea.

[duhragonball]

[FIC] Luffa: The Legendary Super Saiyan (97/?)

Disclaimer: This story features characters and concepts based on Dragon Ball, which is a trademark of Bird Studio/Shueisha and Toei Animation.   This is an unauthorized work, and no profit is being made on this work by me. This story is copyright of me. Download if you like, but please don’t archive it without my permission. Don’t be shy.

Continuity Note: About 1000 years before the events of Dragon Ball Z.

Previous chapters conveniently available here.

[16 June, 234 Before Age.  Planet Shenia]

The military of Planet Shenia was formidable, much more so than would be expected for a planet considered insignificant by the major galactic powers.  Centuries ago, Shenia was a client state of the Camelian Empire, and used as a buffer against a rival power, the Qophean Khanate.  Decades later, the balance of power shifted, and the border moved, and Camelia withdrew from Shenia.  But the people of Shenia had not forgotten their vigilance against foreign invasion.  Their armies were well-trained and well-armed, and rumors of their ki techniques were enough to frighten away would-be raiders.  One of Shenia's national holidays celebrated a time when they defended their world against a Saiyan invader, and prevailed.

This time, however, Shenia was visited by two Saiyans, and the outcome was not as favorable.  A week later, the entire Shenian parliament was captured, and they quickly surrendered.  Over the next several days, a ransom payment was assembled to pay the Saiyans to leave the planet peacefully.  A portion of this was converted into a sort of expense account, which the Saiyans used to pay for meals and souvenirs while they enjoyed Shenia's nightlife.

"Look at this," Seltiss asked as she twirled around in a dress she had just purchased.  The price tags still dangled from the hem as she showed it off.  "I thought it was sequins, but it's actually some kind of fiber optic technology, so when the lighting changes..."

The discotheque's lighting included a number of lasers and other devices to shine an array of colors onto the patrons.  Seltiss was sticking close to the bar, but she stepped just slightly to one side so a passing strobe light could flash onto her clothes.  Her dress refracted and shifted the frequency of this light, producing a vivid pattern of oranges and violets.

Sitting at the bar, Xibuyas could only stare and nod awkwardly.  To everyone else in the club, they were just unusual-looking humanoid, not so different from the Shenians themselves.  To the bartender serving them meals, they were just a couple of rowdy adolescents.  But to Xibuyas, the teenage girl standing before him was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.  The dress had nothing to do with it.

"It's nice," he muttered, and then he looked away to take another piece of fish from his bowl.  

"Everything's so colorful here," Seltiss said.  “Not like Planet Saiya at all.  Dad would flip out if he saw me wearing anything but royal blue.  And the academy on Protef is even worse, if you can believe it.  Four options in their dress code, and all four are drab earth tones.  And they wondered why I dropped out."

Xibuyas said nothing.  For what it was worth, he liked her school uniforms, with their pleated skirts and the crisp sharp lines of their starched suit jackets.  They made her look very cosmopolitan, unlike the handful of other Saiyan females he had encountered in his young life.  Most of them were caregivers or teachers, middling warriors who only attended to his upbringing because they lacked the talent to do anything important on their own.  

Seltiss was different.  His instructors and King Rehval had told him that he would be married to her when they were of age, and he had absorbed this information like any other dry fact they had taught him.  But Seltiss herself was so much more than a princess of the Saiyans.  She was smart and funny and mischievous, and completely unafraid of anything.  She was the only Saiyan he knew who routinely disobeyed the king.  

And she really liked him.  She wasn't just using him for his power, the way her father did.  His power was important to her plans, true, but she spent time with him, and complimented him, and told him things that she never told anyone else.

"What's eating you, Xibuyas?" she asked.  "Don't tell me you're still sore about your fight with Luffa."

He didn't know how to answer that, so he changed the subject.  "Would your father still let us marry, Seltiss?  I failed him, and he knows not that I survived that battle.    I doubt that he would be relieved to find that I survived."

"Oh, is that all?" Seltiss said.  She approached him and patted his cheek, causing him to wince with embarrassment.  "Take it easy, Xibuyas.  Public displays of affection are normal for most civilizations.  You don't have to be so stuffy all the time."

But he did.  It helped him stay focused, especially around her.    King Rehval had great plans for him.  He was destined to become the king of the Saiyans, and through Seltiss, King Xibuyas' descendants would rule their people through centuries of prosperity.  It was a glorious opportunity, and he found it much less overwhelming when he used formal speech, and carried himself like he mighty warrior he was expected to be.  A mask of false pride to hide the cracks in his confidence.

What frustrated him was that he couldn't even use royal address with Seltiss, because she had commanded him not to.    "Princess Seltiss was never here," she had explained.  "As far as the universe knows, we're just two anonymous Saiyan raiders."  

It hadn't really been a command.  More like instructions for her plan.  He loved that about her too.  Seltiss respected him, and what little regal bearing she had, she dropped it completely with him.  He didn't know if that was because she loved him back, or because she saw him as a fellow royal due to their engagement.

"Why don't we get some air?" Seltiss offered.  "You don't look like you're in the mood to dance."

He sighed with relief.  Sometimes she seemed to understand him better than he knew himself.  After a few minutes to settle their bill, they walked outside together, though Seltiss stubbornly held onto his arm the whole way.

*******

The night air helped improve his disposition a little, and getting away from the crowd made a bigger difference than he would have expected.  Normally, he craved every moment alone with Seltiss that he could get, but things were different now.

"So what's up, Xibuyas?" Seltiss asked as they flew.  "You can tell me."

"It's difficult to put into words, your h-- er, Seltiss," he said.

"Good catch," Seltiss said.  "You were great the other day, you know that?  The way you tore through the Shenian fleet..."

"I could have done it faster," he said.

"Don't be so hard on yourself," she said.  "You're the strongest Saiyan alive!  The strongest Saiyan who ever lived, I bet."

"I wasn't stronger than Luffa," he grumbled.

"Well, she's not really a Saiyan, right?" Seltiss replied.

"That is what your father always told me," Xibuyas said.  "Suppose... well, what if he was... wrong?"

"You think she's really one of us?" Seltiss asked.

"I don't know," Xibuyas said.  "But she... seemed Saiyan enough.  I don't mean her eyes and hair, but the way she moved.  Her scent and the sound of her voice.  It was much easier to believe her a fraud before I faced her in battle."

"Okay, but what difference does it make if she’s a Saiyan or not?" Seltiss asked.  "She's still an enemy of the crown, the one you'll be wearing one of these days."

"You're so certain of that," Xibuyas said.  "Your father has other heirs to choose from.   One of your sisters, or perhaps he'll have another child in the future."

"You forget how stubborn my dad can be," Seltiss said.  "He likes to pretend that he's flexible, but once he makes up his mind, he's pretty much locked in."  She pointed at herself and smiled.  "You're not his only pet project, you know."

They landed on the beach of an island that happened to catch Seltiss's fancy, and she took off her boots so she could feel the sand between her toes as they walked.  

"My father had it all worked out since before I was born," she explained.  "He used some special system to test Saiyan women, then he picked one that would give him the best heir.  That was my mother.  He tinkered with me the whole time I was in the incubation tank.  I couldn't tell you what he did, but it was all for the sake of making me his ideal successor.  That's what I've been hearing my whole life.  My sisters are just Plan B.    I'm the one he put the most work into.  He made me smarter than all of them.  Don't ask me how."

She suddenly drew back her fist and tried to punch him in the jaw, but he blocked it with his open palm.  Seltiss grinned and shook her head.

"I'm not very strong, but dad doesn't seem worried about that.  My children will be stronger, he tells me, as long as their father has the right genes.  That's where you come in, tough guy."

"I never even knew my parents,"  Xibuyas said.  "King Rehval told me I was gifted with a strong bloodline, but he still used his potions to make me even stronger."

"You must have something about you," Seltiss said.  "Otherwise, he wouldn't be marrying you off with me.  Don't you see,  Xibuyas?  I know you’re grateful to him and all, but in the end, he needs us more than we need him."

She threw her arms around his neck, and for a brief, nerve-wracking moment, he thought that she might kiss him.  She only smiled instead, and he wasn’t sure if he was relieved or disappointed.

"At least, he needs us until we give him a litter of grandchildren," she said.  "So in the meantime, we're pretty much free to do whatever we please."

"And this is what pleases you?" he asked.  “Invading a backwater planet and playing tourist?”

"I studied military tactics for a semester," Seltiss said.  "This is the first time I've gotten to put it into practice.  I always wanted to conquer my own planet, but I was hoping you'd enjoy it.  You've been so depressed ever since the battle on Pflaume."

This time she really did lean in to kiss him, and he backed away from her, a little more forcefully than he would have liked.

"Xibuyas, what's wrong?" Seltiss asked.  "What happened between you and Luffa?"

"Nothing!" he lied.  The look in her dark brown eyes told him that his response was a mistake.  Seltiss was the smartest person he knew, with the possible exception of her father.  And she knew him much better than her father.

"There can't be any secrets between us," she said.  "It's just you and me against the galaxy, remember?  Dad isn't going to look out for us beyond his own needs, and the rest of the universe thinks we're a couple of brainless savages."

"I know," he said quietly.  That was exactly why he didn't want to tell her.  

"Whatever it is," we'll deal with it together," Seltiss assured him.  "I'm the brains of this outfit, remember?"

For a long monent, he struggled with his indecision, and then he finally mumbled:  "Very well.  The truth is that..."

But before he could say another word, the ground beneath them exploded.

"Saiyans!" a voice cried out.  "I never expected to find creeps like you on Shenia, but I guess I could use the workout!"

When the dust settled, they could finally see their visitor hovering twenty feet above them.  It was an alien, insectoid in appearance, though its lower body resembled the tail of a massive serpent.  

"Where did you come from?"  Seltiss asked.  Before she could get an answer, Xibuyas stepped in front of her.

"Careful," he warned her.  "it's stronger than it looks."

"Smart boy," the alien said.  "And to answer the female's question, my name is Clondique.  You might call me a superhero.  I'm kind if a big deal in this sector."

"I've never heard of you," Seltiss said.

Clondique shrugged all four of  her shoulders.  "I knew that publicist was a waste of money.  Well, take my word for it, I was a major player in this part of the galaxy.  Came to Shenia for my third metamorphosis, wanted someplace nice and peaceful while I chilled out for eighty years, and I wake up to find the whole planet's been conquered?  By a couple of kids?"

"I'm more than a match for a talking eyesore like you," Xibuyas replied.  "If it's a fight you crave, I'll--"

He took two steps toward Clondique, and then Seltiss called out to him.

"Hold it, Xibuyas!" she said.  "I'll handle her myself."

"What?" Xibuyas asked.

But she had already removed her dress, revealing the pink leotard she normally wore in combat situations.  She looked up at Clondique and smiled.

"You may be stronger than me, but I'm as much a Saiyan as you are," she said.  "This guy wants a workout, and so do I."

"Your boyfriend is right, kid," Clondique said.   "You shouldn't take me so lightly."

"Prove it," Seltiss demanded.

*******

Clondique's power was substantial, but this wasn't Seltiss' main concern.  She knew Xibuyas would step in if she appeared to be in any real danger.  The real challenge was getting him to open up to her, and she believed she could accomplish that through battle.  

She and Xibuyas were the same age, though the chronology of their young lives was distorted by her father's use of the Hyperbolic Time Chamber.  It allowed beings to enter another dimension where time flowed at a faster rate.  On different occasions, King Rehval had sent Seltiss into the Chamber to focus her studies, and to hone her combat skills with different instructors.    Xibuyas, on the other hand, had spent most of his life inside the Chamber.  He had been a baby when Seltiss first met him three years ago, but each time she saw him after that, he was always a little bit taller, and a great deal stronger.  Her father saw him as little more than a breeding stock, but he also wanted to use him as an enforcer.  More than four-fifths of his life had been devoted solely to mastering the art of war.

And so, as Seltiss charged after Clondique and exchanged blows with the alien, it was with the hope that she could reach him in a language Xibuyas would understand better than words.

Clondique's chitinous fists managed to connect with her a few times, though Seltiss managed to recover and back away before taking too much of a beating.  She responded with a hail of energy bullets from the palm of her right hand, but Clondique was able to avoid them with astonishing ease.  

She had her suspicions about what was bothering the boy, and with some clever manipulation, she was sure she could trick him into revealing enough information for her to figure the rest out without him even realizing it.  But that would defeat the point, which was to convince him that he should confide in her no matter what.  

"Hold still, you little--!" Clondique griped as she chased after her through the air.  Seltiss had no intention of standing her ground until she knew exactly what she was up against.  Until then, she danced around Clondique, a avoiding her offense as well as she could, and only fighting back when it was safe to do so.

The message she wanted to send was this: I'm a Saiyan warrior like you.  We share the same passions, the same longing for combat.    Xibuyas already knew this, but Seltiss liked to remind him from time to time.  Besides, she really did enjoy fighting, even if Clondique might not have been her first choice for an opponent.

The alien swung her tail at Seltiss and for a split-second, Seltiss thought she had successfully avoided the strike.   Then she sensed the ki energy welling up in Clondique's body, and Seltiss had to dodge again, barely escaping a volley of ki blasts from Clondique's hands.   Then the tail swiped at her again, and Seltiss found herself regretting that most of her combat training had been with humanoid sparring partners.  

After a few minutes, Seltiss decided she had enough of Clondique's measure to risk striking back, only to find that she had miscalculated.  Clondique could block with two hands, fight with two more, and use the tail either way.  This would only be a minor challenge if the two of them were evenly matched, but Seltiss was beginning to notice that Clondique's power level had been steadily rising as they fought.    The alien had been holding back, or perhaps she just needed time to warm up.

Seltiss resorted to an explosive wave, more out of a growing sense of desperation than any calculated plan.  She preferred to stick to a script, and while she had planned to look vulnerable against Clondique, she was turning out to be more vulnerable than she had expected.  Pink ki energy blasted out from the young Saiyan's body in all directions, just as Clondique tried to catch her between her fists and her serpentine tail.  Seltiss didn't expect it to stop Clondique, but it would at least guarantee some breathing room for--

And then Clondique grabbed her anyway.

"Cute trick," Clondique said.   Using one pair of arms, she locked Seltiss in a full nelson, and she used her lower arms to grab hold of Seltiss' ankles.   Seltiss wondered why Clondique hadn't used her tail instead, and then Clondique curled it forward until the tip of her tail was aimed at Seltiss' head, and it began to glow. 

"You bit off more than you could chew, kiddo," Clondique said.  "Happens to everybody, sooner or later."

Seltiss struggled against Clondique's grip, but it was no use.  It was only now, at this close range, that she could sense just how strong the alien really was.   She wasn't entirely sure if even Xibuyas could win.

Clondique's tail glowed brighter.  "This won't kill you," the alien explained, "although when you wake up, you'll probably wish it had.   Energy venom packs a hell of a hangover, but I can't risk you trying something stupid while I tackle your boyfriend down there."

Suddenly, Seltiss' morale brightened considerably.  "It'll take more than your puny attack to kill a Saiyan!" she shouted defiantly.  

"Didn't you hear me?" Clondique asked.   "I just said I'm not going to kill you."

Seltiss struggled against Clondique's grip, though she knew it was pointless.  "Even if you could destroy me, Xibuyas would avenge me!" she shouted.  

"What is your damage, kid?" Clondique asked.  "The fight's over.  You think that yokel down there can save you?  I can tell he's no match for--"

Without warning, Xibuyas transformed.   Seltiss didn't really know what to call it.  His aura glowed bright yellow, and his hair stood up.  His eyes glowed solid white, and his muscles seemed to expand a little.  Seltiss had never seen the Legendary Super Saiyan in action before, but from what she had heard, Xibuyas' power increase bore some resemblance to Luffa's other form...

Suddenly, it dawned on Seltiss.  It had been right in front of her the whole time.  

But before she could give the matter any thought, Xibuyas had already launched himself at Clondique, and severed all four of the alien's arms, freeing Seltiss immediately.  

Clondique barely had time to register what was happening.   Her energy venom attack was still charging, and when her arms were injured, she instinctively fired, though Xibuyas swatted this bolt of ki aside with a wave of his hand.   With his other hand, he fired a ki blast of his own, which tore through Clondique's torso, killing her instantly.  

Seltiss found that Clondique's severed hands still had a powerful grip, but without any ki to amplify it, it took only a moment's exertion for Seltiss to shake them off her arms and legs.  When she looked up, she saw that the battle was already over.

Only Xibuyas wasn't finished.  

With a loud roar, he released all his pent-up aggression and directed it at Clondique's body.  The barrage of ki blasts was as relentless as it was pointless.  Clondique was already dead.  Within three seconds, the body was damaged beyond recognition.  Within five seconds, the remains of Clondique had been completely reduced to ash and vapor.    Xibuyas kept firing for another fifteen seconds after that.  Fortunately for everyone on Planet Shenia, he had angled his fire away from the planet, so that his blasts would head for outer space instead of damaging the planet, though Seltiss couldn't tell if that was a conscious decision or if it was just from the habits drilled into him from his combat training.

When he finally calmed down, Seltiss approached him.  She was cautious, but cheerful nonetheless.  Her plan had nearly backfired, but it had all worked out in the end.  

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"That filthy thing was going to kill you!" Xibuyas shouted.  He turned to face her, and as he reverted to his normal appearance, she could see tears in his eyes.

"I had the situation under control, babe."

"I never should have let you fight her alone!" he said.  "I almost got you killed, and then--!"

He didn't finish the thought, but she could guess the rest.  Whatever he was keeping from her, however heavy the burden, at least he had the option to share it with her.  But if she were killed, the  he would have no choice but to carry that weight alone, for whom else could he tell?

"Luffa," he finally said after a long pause.  

"What's she got to do with anything?" Seltiss asked innocently.  She had a pretty good idea by now, but she needed him to say it.

"She said... she said that she was my mother," Xibuyas replied.

Seltiss pretended to be shocked, though in truth she had suspected this ever since the battle on Pflaume.  Xibuyas was born around the same time Luffa became a Super Saiyan, and his powers had a certain similarity.  Besides, it made no sense for Luffa to have defeated Xibuyas without killing him.  She knew little about Luffa, but Seltiss couldn't believe that Luffa would show mercy to such an implacable enemy.

"Your mother?" she asked with a gasp.  

"I couldn't believe it at first," Xibuyas said.  "I still don't, but... What if it's true?  What if she truly is an alien?  That would make me..."

It would make him unworthy of her father's breeding plans.  That was the missing piece.   Seltiss had known from the beginning that King Rehval never would have bothered with Xibuyas as an heir without first confirming his bloodline.  But Xibuyas didn't know how thorough her father was about these things, and being an orphan probably caused him to question his self-esteem from time to time.  

Well, that was easy enough to fix.  Seltiss could explain it to him.  If Luffa really was his mother, it only proved that Luffa was a genuine Saiyan herself.  Her father must have known all this.  

And that could work to her advantage.  If Rehval's goal was to marry Luffa's bloodline with his own, then he needed Xibuyas even more than she had ever imagined.  By comparison, Seltiss was somewhat expendable--one of her sisters would do in a pinch--but Xibuyas... he was irreplaceable.  

She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him passionately before he could push her away.    To her surprise, he returned her embrace.  It made sense.  Before, he had been worried that he wasn't worthy to of her intimacy, but now that he had told her...

"It doesn't matter," she said when she finally pulled away from his lips.  "You and I, what we have, it's more important than family or pedigrees."

She could have told him why it didn't matter, that it really was a non-issue, but she needed him to believe that she was being gracious instead of practical.  If Xibuyas really was indispensable to her father, then she needed to make herself indispensable to him.

"Seltiss--!" was all he could say.

"We'll figure something out," Seltiss said.  "If it turns out to be true, then we might be able to use it to our advantage, but it doesn't change what's between us.  Got it?"

"Of... of course, my lady," he stammered.  "You... you are the brains of this outfit, as you put it."

She smiled and kissed him again.  "Smart boy," she said.  "Now, let's go get some dinner, and then I want to go shopping one more time."

"Don't you have enough clothes already?" Xibuyas asked.

"Not for me, for you," Seltiss said.  "We're meeting the Prime Minister tomorrow to go over our ransom inventory, and I want you to look your best..."

*******

[17 June, 234 Before Age..  Planet Shenia.]

"You're welcome to check the manifest yourself, of course," the minister said.

The Prime Minister of Shenia had a rather spacious office, primarily to accommodate press events and conferences.  He rarely hosted diplomatic envoys, due to Shenia’s isolation from the rest of the galaxy, though there was enough furniture for about two dozen ambassadors.   In spite of this, Seltiss took a seat on the corner of his desk, while Xibuyas stood behind his chair, looming over him with a menacing glower.

"No need for that," Seltiss said.  She slapped the paperwork with the back of her hand and made a satisfied nod.  "This all looks to be in order.  You could forge a lot of these documents, but not the tonnage of the shipments themselves, and the ones Xibuyas and I spot-checked looked to be in order.  Besides, none of it's leaving Shenia anyway."

"I don't... what?" the minister asked.

"Xibuyas and I will just bury it in the desert.  Later on, we'll parcel it out to you and the other ministers as a reward for your compliance."

"Madam Saiyan, I don't understand," the minister said, trying to contain his growing panic.  "You said you would leave Shenia once we paid this ransom."

"That's what I want the rest of the galaxy to think," she explained.  "If anyone visits Shenia and sees the aftermath of our invasion, I want them to think it was a couple of Saiyan raiders who took off once they got their plunder.  That way, no one will know we're still here, ruling the planet in secret."

"But why?" the minister asked.  

"Because I need a base of operations," Seltiss said.  "And if I conquered a planet outright, certain parties might come along to try to stop me.  If my father knew I was here, doing this, he'd probably kill me.  Well maybe not kill me, but he'd totally flip out."

"This isn't what we agreed," the minister protested.

"Oh, it's close enough," Seltiss insisted.  "Xibuyas and I will keep a low profile.  Your government will still control the planet, but you'll be taking orders from us.  Don't worry, we'll try to stay out of your way.  I'd suggest a special task force to handle our needs, but if you'd rather meet with me directly, that's no problem."

The minister was sweating now.  "You can't just renege on our agreement!" he said.  "Our army can still fight--!"

"Oh, please," Seltiss said.  "Do you think I picked this place at random?  Your warriors gave us a good workout, but you Shenians are practical enough to know when you're beaten.  Xibuyas could have destroyed your entire military, but we need it to maintain this ruse of mine.  Your ancestors were realistic enough to cooperate with the Camelians, and you're sensible enough to cooperate with me."

"Then why didn't you just tell us all this when we asked for terms of surrender?" he asked.   "If you were so sure we'd capitulate, why bother having us assemble a ransom at all?"

"That's easy," Seltiss explained.  "I asked for the ransom to see if you'd actually follow my instructions."  She held up the manifest and waved it at him.  "This right here proves you're willing to play along, and that you're not foolish enough to try to call for help or rat me out to my father.  You know Xibuyas can destroy this planet, and it's worth putting up with us for a while to make sure that doesn't happen."

The minister lowered his head and groaned.  "What are you kids going to do with our planet?" he asked.

"Oh, not much, minister," Seltiss said.  "You've been gracious hosts to Xibuyas and me, so I thought we might invite over some friends..."

NEXT: The Adventure of Bred

[luvdsc]

(1/?) hii, 🐧 anon here, back on track with very long ask to send you cause i miss you 🥺💓. i also danced to twice’s signal with my class but thinking about it, i must also look like a fish flopping around kekskswk. i sometimes felt insecure bc of being tall for a young age (am i young? idk) and only some of my friends, not always tho, it is iust like a joke but my family does. my family is also very tall, my dad is 190cm and my brother is like 2 meters (?), my mom isn’t tall, she is short - 🐧

(2/?) she is only 159cm and my baby sister is also tall, she is 2 years old but she is taller than most kids at her age and taller some of the kids older than her 😅. i never went to a concert before but if i do, being tall is definitely a benefit for me loll! i literally try to learn dances, i just watch the mv many times and copy it (only the chorus) i’m trying to learn blackpink’s how you like that, hope i can 😚. i usually visit my cousins when i was small, during summer mostly - 🐧

(3/?) hà nội is beautiful, i also love visiting it, and hội an too! my mon loves hội an, because there are many types of snacks there and it is like a paradise for me and my mom 🥰❤️. your trip to vietnam sounds amazing 🤩, it seems you have alot of fun there! to me, there isn’t much to see in sài gòn (since in sài gòn, mostly are malls) idk if you knew are not Thành phố Hồ Chí Minh and Sài Gòn are one! just the name changed, Sài Gòn is the old name of Thành Phố Hồ Chí Minh - 🐧

(4/?) i never went to Ngọc Châu Garden i think, this is actually my first time hearing this sksksk, i am embarrassed for living in Vietnam for my whole life and not knowing the restaurant 😅. I also thought my city is gorgeous too! This is my personal opinion but i think that, Hồ Chí Minh is like a modern city while Hà Nội is more ancient. omg same! my mom would get upset if we didn’t suggest anything to eat but then she cooked it and we didn’t like it, she would get upset - 🐧

(5/6and tbh, idk if i am responsible or not? cause i do sometimes but mostly not, i just do it cause i want to help out a bit, even though i helped a lot, i still get shout for being lazy 😞 but i do agree tho, like between lazy and responsible? i am not sure if i am close to my brother or not, even if he come back home, he doesn’t help me out that much, it is just like without him 😔, but i am used to that so i couldn’t complain abt anything, he helped with the dishes, but not much 😢 - 🐧

(6/6) i saw your jaemin’s fic come up omg! i will read it when i have time and i saw bang chan’s signature drawing on the title’s banner (is it call that wat?) ! the one that look like a worm and a dragon (?) my stay inner is screaming aaahhh! i hope you’re having a nice week and life is treating you well! my week are the same, stay hydrated, eat 3 meals a day and get enough rest hunny bunny 💕💕. i love you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ - 🐧

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hello, honey bee!!!! 🌷 i love your messages, and i’m so happy to hear from you again! i missed you too!! 💕 sdfajsasjdfhj at least you know how to dance to twice’s signal!! i’m sure you looked just as amazing as tzuyu 🤩 and omg i’m positive you’re just as gorgeous and tall as weki meki’s doyeon, snsd’s sooyoung, gfriend’s sowon, and twice’s tzuyu 💝💝💝 you look like an absolute goddess!!! 💜 also oh my goodness, your dad and brother are so tall!!!! 😦 woah, i wish i was taller aksldhflkajsd pls share some of your height with me 

your mom is the same height as my sister i think and omg your sister got the tall model genes too!!!! and yes! it’s such a great perk of being tall because everyone else is short and you can comfortably watch and record the concert :’) omg that’s so cool though!!! you must be able to pick up dances really quickly :o which dance was the easiest for you to learn? and i hope you’ll be able to memorize bp’s hylt quickly 💘 aah, i see! when i was younger, i used to visit my cousins out of state too, but my family and i went every christmas break 💓

i love hà nội and hội an so much! i want to revisit them both 💕 omg yeah they had yummy food there!! i also bought one of my favorite bags there, it’s like a circular rattan bag? i love it so much. do you go to hội an with your mom a lot? it was soooo much fun!!! i absolutely loved all the different places we were able to visit and all the things i got to experience! 💛 oh yes, i heard people use both names interchangeably for the city! Sài Gòn is such a pretty name, and i want to call my cat that if i ever adopt one :’)

and omg no, you shouldn’t be embarrassed! i don’t even know all the restaurants in the city i live in LOL also, since we were tourists, we had chosen places to eat that were recommended by other tourists on yelp and such, and we didn’t really know the good food places that locals would go to 😅 but the food was amazing, and i loved it! 🌸 ooo yes, that’s what i thought when i visited both cities! i really like the more ancient style since the US is all modern, so i especially loved hà nội and yeah, like you said, Hồ Chí Minh has a lot of malls, and i’m not super interested in shopping akjhdfds and LOL yes exactly!!! i see that all moms are the same :’) 

i think you’re very responsible, lovebug! 💕 you’re helping out around the house, and you take good care of your sister every day, like i don’t think my mom ever trusted leaving me alone with my sister at home, but your parents trust you to take care of her even as a toddler!! 💟 also, i think all asian parents just like to yell at their kids for being lazy because that’s what happens to me and my friends too 🤧  akjsdhfljkasfdhla i think your brother sounds like the irresponsible and lazy one here 😅 you’re the one who’s doing so much :o

and omg i hope you’ll enjoy the jaemin fic!!! 💛 and oh my gosh yes!!! i was wondering if anyone would notice that little drawing ✨ i have it in the headers for jaemin, hyuck, and jisung :’) i gotta let my inner stay also show 🤩🤩 and thank you so so much, honey bee!!!! 🥺💗💗 my week is going good, and life has been treating me very well! (except it’s currently like 40 degrees celcius and i wanna melt rip) and i wish the same to you also 💘💘 drink lots of water, eat lots of yummy food, and make sure to get a good night’s sleep every night, sweetpea 🌸 ily lots!!!!! 💓💖💕💝💞💗✨🌷