#i love the bad end and esp bad end akira

[muzzleroars]

i'm fucking. whagshjqgdjshdb first of all i'm obsessed with ur supercomputer au it's SO sick!! but second, now that p5r has been ported to pc i've been able to play it again n i've been LAMENTING how little the actual game did with yaldabaoth? but it's inspired me to do as i do n create ocs to remedy lack of character exploration lmao n i've settled on this idea to create a kind of "daughter" for yaldabaoth? the gist of it is that he created her by separating part of himself into its own being, n she comes from the distorted desires of humans who essentially know things are wrong n have the desire to change them but are still afraid of rocking the status quo? she's essentially another variable in his "game," as well as a way for him to attempt to quell any feelings of regret or remorse within him (since. a being created from human desires shouldn't be able to separate himself from them, but). n ultimately, his plan for her is to reabsorb her into himself at the culmination of his power, to prove that humanity's desire for change is still too weak to challenge him, but she ends up defying him n their resolution is that he regrets the way everything played out n the ultimate culmination is that even though he is a "god", bc he is born from humanity he could never completely rid himself of things that make up human psyche. also i wanted to explore the possibility for him to genuinely care about humanity through her; since she's technically a piece of him, n it's just got me thinking about everything n the fact that like. in canon he pushed akira so hard n the ultimate conclusion of the game to be like. "well, anyways!" after everything was SOO frustrating bc there was literally no reason for him to orchestrate things the way he did if there wasn't also So Much More To It

HOOTIN AND HOLLERIN...YEA!!!! YOU GET IT!!

i totally also 100% believe there just...HAD to be more when it came to yaldabaoth and i think he was cheated out of getting his development, esp when you consider his relationship with akira as well as the similarities the two of them share. they develop a social link together that culminates in yaldabaoth offering a place by his side, and how they reflect one another is actually interesting: they're both of the fool arcana, they both have a shapeshifter and faceless motif, and akira's ultimate persona is yaldabaoth's son. generally speaking, the big bad god isn't so deeply connected to the main character so like. what happened!!! he's also built up as such a major presence in akira's life, he's his guiding adult figure, and they've created a bond as deep as the ones akira shares with his closest friends. it's such a fantastic setup, to have the protagonist so unwittingly close with the final antagonist and then????? THEY DO NOTHING WITH IT??????? it's honestly so bizarre that how personal this all is is NEVER addressed by the narrative whatsoever since what's the point otherwise???

BUT to get back on track, it really would have been SO nice for yaldabaoth to have more of a connection to the human consciousness. i’m bringing it up again i know, but that’s why i really loved how the anime had him refer to himself as “us” and “we” in his grail form - i think there’s a yaldabaoth that is individual (god) and a yaldabaoth that is collective (grail), with the collective sort of being his base form. he becomes something else with a sense of identity, but yal is ultimately forged from the desires of humanity and he responds to it. i really wish there would have been more acknowledgement of his situation, where he has grown into a god only because it was wished for - he is an amalgamation of desire and so many people were being crushed under the weight of societal pressure that he became a god to answer prayers. and yaldabaoth has disdain for humanity, but imo his solution isn’t meant to be a punishment, it’s just what he believes is the best way to solve the problem. ALL THAT TO SAY...i would love for him to be able to play off of a character that represents all of that for him skdfhdg like to acknowledge that he obviously has feelings about all of this and he’s not at all divorced from it would add a lot...and i esp like the idea for her character because yaldabaoth admits that there are good people out there, but so many of them do nothing or are otherwise looked over, and i just think that line isn’t talked about enough!!! ALSO also i just like thinking that she’d be a character throughout the game...and the reveal would be really good aaaa!!!

[astro-break]

Thoughts on the 10th ep of Hypmic Rhyme Anima+. Spoilers beware

Season 1 | Ep.1 | Ep.2 | Ep.3 | Ep.4 | Ep. 5 | Ep. 6 | Ep. 7 | Ep. 8 | Ep. 9

LETS GOOOO MCD flashbackkkkk

Oh look finally a good look at TBH and the mastermind's faces, nice thanks OFC the big bag is Kaibyaku the medical dude

ah so in the end it all leads back to that company if all three of them worked in the same place

Ofc the classic cheek punch then pass out, always happens

LMAOO they knocked each others teeth out and made friendship bracelets out of it thats a romance right there.

Oh damn does that mean that kaibyaku has some of of medical issue? that was an IV in his arm im pretty sure or at least some sort of drip. Maybe Jakurai will play some sort of big end of series role that heals him? I hope not, that would be a bit boring but it would make sense since kujaku posse is the only duo not affiliated with the whole TBH trio thing

Leader battle lets goooo we'll probably get another leader song which is always fun

I hope we get a TBH one

EYYY HEADSET MIC LETS GOOO I looooveddd rosho's one and im so glad theres another one which is always fun

Huh mic embedded in the hand? Thats an interesting concept

[On a second rewatch I think its interesting how Kenji specifically says "I can't fall here. Not we. Theres some foreshadowing that he is the only real one here. He specifics in his rap vers that its "that wretched party" that belongs in a grave, not any of our characters in particular]

[also another detail. The necromancy + skull imagery to their rap verse…. they are bringing back old ghosts with their song… they are so tragic. The rap on as second watch is just so much more tragic once you know everything]

Kuko's rap uses the letters T B H as the starts of his verses which is fun

NIce imagery of three dragons fighting for dominance, a very apt metaphor for IchiSamaKuko who are just hothead extremes

huh wonder what was ripped up

oh thats a neat explanation of how they were able to do a lot of supernatural stuff. I feel like it would have been more interesting if it was a hallucination, but hey I'll take that L its not that bad even if a bit uninspired/not very well foreshadowed

Also the vibrations as controlling element, as someone who can hear electronics, is something that would work for me 100% wwwww I would go crazy if i had to hear those annoying sound waves 24/7

I mean exposition episode but its kinda cute actually? I hate that they're doing this after revealing that they're dead but it does put in the point that they were people, not good people, but still people

bro… bro… satoru specifically says in his rap that the world's our kitchen… he has so many kitchen metaphors here…. bro still holds his dream of opening a restaurant with his totally platonic life bro even after death… bro…..

I mean its not that bad of a motive, im not that convinced that they're in the wrong. I'm also very much a sucker for acts of destructive love which is why i may be more inclined to cheer for kaibyakumon

While I do wish that they had fleshed out Kenji's relationship with Satoru and Akira a bit more, I do feel like the duo's dynamic on its own was really well presented before the big reveal. Like what's Kenji's feelings about SatoAkira, why is he so invested in this whole plan other than borderline idolizing kaibyaku?

I feel its hilarious how kenji's just sitting there while kaibyaku is just going on his monologue wwww

Nice, i like how they used Oosaka's island nature into their planning but there Are other bridges going into the mainland im pretty sure?

okay but why should you care? Like hes doing a overall good? Kaibyakumon's goals are aligned with the overall cast's motive of making sure that the government is placed in check so if the team wants us to have a reason to root against them, gotta give a good reason, esp after that backstory

LMAO HIFUMI oh i feel so bad for him

[ahxiang]

tea love why do i feel like you've read all the bl manga/manhwa out there akgssjksks every time an adaptation is announced you've already read the original

i would also feel v iffy about coin laundry if i only read the summary but one actor is 27 and the other is 23 and they're playing a middle-aged man and a highschooler so i'm more confused than anything else. what were their ages in the manga? do you think they're changing the plot a bit to make it less questionable?

btw do you maybe have some bl/gl manhwa recs?👀 i feel like i've read quite a few but you probably know a lot more. for reference some of my favs are soulmate, their story, pond snail robber. and i'm currently reading straight girl trap and honyak/two souls and both have pleasantly surprised me like the first one has a v questionable premise and i was expecting a fucked up power dynamic in the second but no both are really nice and enjoyable and almost unproblematic (esp comparing to some other stuff i've read😬) oh! but i don't read b&w mangas bc for some reason it's hard for me to process it :(

- @ahxu-laowen

sofia, my love! sorry it took me so long to respond, i had a busy day yesterday, but i'm back! this is gonna be longggg, so i put it under a cut!!

absjsjk, i do read a lot of queer comics, but lemme let you in on my secret. when i first started to get into manga/manhwa/manhua, i just started reading what sounded interesting or was well reviewed, but i kept coming across really bad ones that just grossed me out. then i think it was when cherry blossoms after winter premiered that i was wayyyy too impatient to wait for the next ep, so when i saw on mdl that ppl really liked the manhwa, i decided to read it and ended up binging the whole thing that night. i ended up noticing that unlike thai shows that are based on sometimes v shitty novels, j-bls and k-bls are usually adaptations of pretty good manga/manhwa. so from then on, i kept my ear to the ground and the moment an adaptation of a manga/manhwa got announced, i'd read it. and lemme tell you, this has worked much better than looking for things to read on my own. much less icky stuff.

so yeah, blupdate2020 announced back in, like, may that minato shoji koinrandori was gonna get a live action adaptation and i immediately read the manga. it is b&w, still ongoing, and honestly i don't recommend it unless you have nothing else to read, it's probably the worst one of the adapted mangas i've read, but it's also not bad. shin is 17 at the start of the manga and they never specify akira's exact age as far as i can remember, but if i do the math he's 27-28, so the ages are def super iffy. luckily akira's not predatory, in fact it could be argued that shin's the predatory one with the way he pursues him. but if you put the weird teenage thoughts of sex aside, their friendship is quite cute and sweet. all of the manga adaptations that i've seen so far have been very faithful to the original source, with just a few changes here and there (usually elimination of sexual language/scenes), so i doubt minato's laundromat will be too different from the manga, but would probably be much more wholesome, which def helps with the iffiness. i watched the first ep and they aged up shin to be a senior rather than a junior, so that helps? a bit? but minus points bc akira objectifies shin upon meeting him more than he did in the manga. ngl, it was weird. besides that, it's exactly the same but more wholesome. shin is much smilier and just less..... weird, absjsj. so yeah, i think it'll be a cute watch with an iffy premise that i trust them to handle well.

as for recs, i def have plenty, most of which are shows you've probably seen. i've only ever read b&w manga, so all these recs are manhwa/manhua.

it's no secret that i'm a huuuuge fan of who can define popularity?, the source material of blueming. i hiiiiighly recommend it, especially if you enjoyed blueming. it's actually quite different from the adaptation, but both have their pros and cons that make it impossible for me to say which is better. da un's whole deal is expanded upon much more, the sapphics get more development, and do ba woo gets a whole storyline and love interest. i also highly recommend cherry blossoms after winter. i'd say the drama is better, but the manhwa is more in depth and practically the same, so it's a good read! it is explicit though and like always the sex scenes are heteronormative and sometimes kinda uncomfy, but if you skip them like i do, it doesn't ruin it. the same goes for love tractor, which is getting an adaptation supposedly later this year. also a little iffy with ages, but v sweet and has a fun dynamic of v buff and manly country boy with a heart of gold and a damaged city boy musician. outside of adapted source material, there's a manhua i enjoyed called 30 sui nanzi wuyu or the secret tales of a 30 year old gay bachelor. honestly, i don't remember much about this one besides the main character and his brother being rich ceo kinda guys, but i know i enjoyed it. and i'm currently reading the ongoing translation of yeouleul guhaejwo or fall for me!, which is so far v unproblematic and is fun bc it's fantasy! the main character is possessed by a gumiho and gets close to the only guy not attracted to him in an effort to get rid of it.

for gl stuff, i do have to look on my own, but so far i haven't found any bad ones, so that's good! my absolute favorite is a manhua called jintian de ta yeshi ruci keai or my darling is the cutest. it breaks down a bunch of stereotypes and tropes, tackles some hard issues like child abuse, has a fantastic ensemble of queer characters, and is just v v sweet. it's ongoing at 122 chapters. the rest of the gl comics i’ve read so far are actually just webcomics and not manga/manhwa/manhua, but they’re still v good! kiss it goodbye is a very cute slice of life set in japan (but actually in english and made by an italian artist) that is complete and ends very well. i’m only five chapters in, but i’m really enjoying the girlfriend project, which is a fake dating story! and the ongoing mermaid x witch comic the sweetness of salt is beautiful and very sweet. i keep making the mistake of reading comics that end up being ongoing and then forgetting about them while i wait for updates, so idk much about these, but i’m also reading rainbow!, she’s a keeper, and waiting for the release of zhui lan or falling blue.

hope this helps and that you enjoy reading!! thank you for the ask 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

[ciaran-archive]

Character I really want to bitch about: Akechi Goro P5R. I can't really put it into words but god I hate fandom characterisation of Goro. Not in a "everyone woobifies him" way but "how can everyone ignore the huge fcking handle-with-care sign on him". I'm. Frustrated. Hngh. I'm sure I'm too hyper about this, but just. no. All of the tragedy of his character, his intelligence, his relationship with his mother is almost completely lost in "aggresively-tsundere serial killer". I don't get the need to... dumb him down or make him incapable of love or lacking in understanding and empathy while portraying his rather just anger at the world. His relationship with Ren too, the confusing love he feels and the way destiny works into their relationship to nearly destroy them both. I feel Ren is portrayed awfully... helpless and morally upright wrt Goro. Which does not make for good ShuAke. (They're foils, thesis and antithesis, not... I'm not sure how to explain it honestly). This is why I prefer JP Goro, a lot of nuance is lost in the English translation of the game itself.

(I loved your characterisation of him a lot, I think I sent some anon asks fangirling about your fics.😅)

I recently got into BSD, and I think I'm going to stay away from fandom (esp wrt Dazai) outside of jokes. There is just no trust.

YES I FULLY AGREE (and thank you for liking my fics!!)

i have said this before, i think, but a huge element of akechi's character is that he is deeply traumatized by humanity as a whole. he has little faith in the goodness of people and even less in systems and governments. he doesn't want to be kind to people because it doesn't end well for him. he cannot bring himself to help people because he has to think about how that might hurt him down the line, and no one else is going to think about his pain. also, he is 18. he's a kid! you know who else is a kid? everybody.

one of the best themes in p5 is how every phantom thief has their own traits that are reflected in akechi: ryuji and goro have similar relationships with their parents; ann and akechi are both public figures/minor celebrities with the self-image issues that entails; yusuke and akechi both have corrupt father figures who use them relentlessly; haru and akechi both have fathers who treat them like objects; futaba and akechi are both clever and lonely in their cleverness and unable to connect with other kids their own age. and akira, of course, always akira, but all of them.

any of the thieves could have ended up like akechi, if not for. if not for akira, if not for people who loved them and reeled them back from the edge, if not for each other. akechi is the only person who gets none of that until it's too late for him. of course he's bitter and jealous and hates everyone! anybody would, in his place.

another thing is that trauma just makes it harder for you to empathize with other people because all your resources are dedicated to getting through your own days. akechi isn't inherently unempathetic or incapable of kindness (not that lacking empathy is bad); he's just not in a place where he could exercise those traits even if he had them. he pretty much has to kill - we don't know what, if anything else, shido had to maintain control over him. can you imagine how much worse it would be if he spent time sympathizing with his victims and the consequences of his actions and then had to do it anyway?

and lastly, p5 stresses that children don't get choices. children don't have power in a world ruled by corrupt and callous adults. they have to bear the abuse until the universe takes pity on their misery and grants them a persona - but in akechi's case, a persona isn't enough. his life is still dominated by the self-serving cruelty of adults because it's not just power that saves you, it's also having other people who understand. and akechi never had anyone understand him until long after it would have changed the trajectory of his life.

as for the way akira gets flattened to his moral uprightness - lmao. pretty much the whole point of akira's character is that he would be exactly like akechi if not for, again: if not for sojiro, ryuji, ann, yusuke, futaba, all his confidants, hammering in over and over that what gives him strength is the bonds he builds with other people, and what keeps him moral is those same bonds. he was willing to kill! it's not that he's a better person than akechi inherently, it's just that the course of his life is dramatically different in ways that support him being good. it's a tenuous morality. he does have an internal sense of right and wrong, justice and injustice - akechi does too. it's not what made him good, though.

i didn't realize i still had so much to say about p5! thanks for sending this in and thanks again for liking my fic <3

[tricksheart]

Real talk here.

Why do I feel so empty when finishing persona 5 royal? ( I once again finished it just now ).The original I didn’t have this problem with. Maybe because that one felt I dunno complete? That the ending made sense? Sure I do like kaSUMI and Maruki but completing the game just feels I dunno hollow? I replayed the original because it had so much replay value but for this, i just want to see the gang together and not go through all the shit they had to go through in the 3rd semester. Maybe because the narrative made it seem like the thieves were at fault? ( those lines and plotlines still piss me off because no, it wasn’t their fault. It was Maruki’s because he manipulated them throughout the game / knew they were the phantom thieves from the start. Like really Atlus? Really? Pushing blame to the thieves esp. Akira who straight up didn’t want this reality / didn’t really wish for it is a no-no ).

In all, I know I’m not the only one who feels this way. Maybe if the plot was different? Or don’t make Maruki to be behind it all? I just can’t really say. Or maybe it was a strategy for us to pick the ‘bad ending’ more? In any case, I still love the original more than I do royal ( besides the updated gameplay mechanics and getting go do more stuff at night thing ). Mic drop.

[kaito-yuki]

Shout Out Thank Yous!

Alrighty I can already tell that this is going to be a long ass post, so I’m just going to say general things here first. I will then address each mun under the Read More (there’s 20+ of you!), so search for your blog mentioned to find my message to you! 

This Fairy Tail OC blog is my 3rd most popular blog by follower count, just under my Vegeta (DBZ) blog which is popular because of the muse itself over the RPing. Kaito is the opposite, which is why I especially find it important to address and thank each and every mun who’s interacted with me through this blog. For actual posts made it is only second to my personal, which just affirms  that this blog has earned its popularity (and bronze medal) here in my opinion. 

I put in my all and beyond to this blog especially, how it’s navigated, organizing the threads and tags as much as I can so me (and you) can read back on things whenever we want, will use it as a template for my other muses/blogs too haha. Kaito (and my other OCs) have grown as characters thanks to the interactions here, especially when it comes to ships! I also have done the most mun/muse vs muse posts here (Shiro has his own tag FFS lmao), which I’m pleased that many of you are a fan of (the posts, not Shiro!) 

To all my followers, thank you for following and sticking with me, esp those from the beginning! To the other RP blogs I haven’t interacted with yet, I’d love to, especially you OCs! I want to also use this blog to advocate for other similar (OC) blogs, that they can also be great and relevant as canon ones with enough hard work!  Now onto the special thanks!

@crystaldragonslayer: Oh looks like the Queen Pixie has returned, the timing couldn’t have been better with your RP comeback! You are just one of the best RP partners out there, I am very grateful for the time and effort we combined together on our RPs/ships. Vivienne is just awesome and probably the main reason why Kaito is too, creating a OTP that deserves it’s own paragraph gdi!

+KaiVi: Kaito & Vivienne have a total of 69 threads by my count atm (I hope I miscounted lmao). I just love this OTP of ours to bits, it is a pleasure and honour working with you on them so far. I can’t wait to start exploring the next stage of their lives and beyond! You know what they say, ’First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes-”-mouth gets frozen by Kaito coz spoilers!- I’m so happy that KaVi has got at least a couple of fans too! Then there’s the AUs, and interactions with them with/and our other muses, so much to look forward to! It’s just really fun to just crossover this ship with others, with other muses ours and our RP partners! Highlights: Battle of Fairy Tail (Thread) | Song | Promo | Wedding (Art)

@starlightxveins​: I usually ship Kaito with Lucy romantically, I never would have thought they’d be the BrOTP too! Your Lucy is a delight and fun to interact with, crossing over the KaiVi, ShiroAqua, GraLu, JerZa and WendyCookies ships is just fabulous and I look forward to more of them (crack) [group] interactions lmao. Can’t wait to start on the other ships we discussed as well!

@celestial-weirdo-lucy: We may only have one thread on here, but I love it! Your Lucy is great, and it’s awesome I get to make a spin on KaiLu by having Kaito have a crush on her already lmao. Then there’s our other ships that I’m excited to develop too! Our KaiLu bodyguard AU is probably my favorite AUs which I look forward to sharing, I’m excited for our other  AUs too (like Gods and Bleach) and ships with our other muses, damn there’s lots to RP!

@celestial-keys-princess​: The Lucy that started it all, Ava you are first mun I approached in the FT RP community and became my guide to others. KaiLu is awesome and I thank you for going through plots and headcanons with me for them! Look forward to continuing their interactions when we do! 

I appreciate you also helping me expand Kaito’s Sabertooth verse with Minerva. Kaito’s ship verse with Tori is still the only one where it’s Shiro and the female teaming up against Kaito, which is so hilarious that I will keep it there lmao. Then there’s our other interactions/ships I’d be happy to get into again like Rukia/Aizen, Laxus/Tori, GraLu (with modern band AU) and Lucy/Jackal, who is atm growling at Lucy behind me because of and/or for her ear rubs lmao Highlights:  A Prayer in the Rain (Thread) | Song | KaiLu (Art/Promo)

@pitchblacksteel: Akira I just love your Gajeel, especially your ships with Lucy and Mira! I look forward to more interactions with him and muses on your multi (like Natsu and Erza!) Kaito still feels bad over the crap Shiro has dragged Gajeel (and Natsu) into lmao.

@poisonouslightslayer: Your Sting is the Sting me (and Kaito) think of whenever Sting is mentioned, you portray him with such depth, it’s really nice to read the posts I see from you! Our interactions also helped inspire me to add a Guild Master addon/verse for Kaito, would love to explore that too!

@itashiro-hitsuchiha​: Thank you for helping me expand Kaito’s Sabertooth and Kingdom Hearts verses, I look forward to continuing our threads with Harumi and Perix!

@dxvilishgrin: Our Kaiio/Mira ship started on Discord, so I’m happy we could also expand upon on it on Tumblr too! Also enjoyed the interactions with your other muses, canons and OCs alike!

@stellcrblossom: Rin I appreciate you and your OCs so much, you gave Kaito a [adoptive] daughter (Ember) and sister (Kamui), and pretty much helped extend his family and my OCs too. Also this helped me branch into going through the next generation of FT, got me working on my other ship’s children too which is appreciated! Can’t wait to RP as Issei (KaiVi’s son) when I’m done with his info! +SakuEm: Sakurai x Ember is one of my favourites and is awesome to see them upgraded to an OTP, and that we created a whole plot/saga/arc/war around Ember’s kidnapping. Can’t wait to continue that and crossover it with my other ships, it’s going to be awesome! Don’t get me started on our AUs, excited for them too! Highlights: Ember Fading (Thread) | Asterius Arc Promo & Graphic

@gureixfurubasuta: Your Gray is great, and I just love their brotherly (gay according to Shiro lmao) bond esp with their shared ties to Ul. Thank you for inspiring me to start my own Gray blog, even though it’s just so I don’t force anyone (like you) to RP Gray for Kaito, and look how that turned out haha. Your Gray (and Juvia) will always by my main for Kaito, and my Gray’s more angsty twin lmao. I’d be happy to interact more through our other muses too!

@sky-dragon-slayer-wendy: Your Wendy is so precious (and a rebel GDI lmao), I loved our thread together and would be happy to continue interactions when you’re free enough again! 

@broken-memories-and-silent-tears: Alice is great and I’m happy to crossover this with our Gralice ship, Kaito and Alice have a great sibling bond with my Gray (and Shiro) between them haha. I’d be happy to add Alice into my fan game as we discussed before way back too, esp now things are better on my end!

@imaginaryserver: Me and (my muses) miss you and your Mavis! Our Cards Against Humanity game is still a memorable time for me from way back, I’m still waiting for an artist to draw it!

@shrimps-variety-garden: I just adore your Levy and her ship with Kaito, the modern AU is especially interesting since it’s based on song lyrics haha. Looking forward to us RPing though to the endgame! Our ship also has helped me develop a more antagonistic version of my Gajeel which is awesome too.

@scythe-rps: Hiroshi is a better guy (and muse) thanks to his best friend Gyrain! it’s good that we can bring more focus onto the usually underappreciated Blue Pegasus! I look forward to when Lyon & Gyrain finally clear the air about their relationship lmao, and thanks for helping me develop Masaru more through their interactions! 

@sunaarashii: Thank you for interacting with Hiroshi, his ship with Cari is just precious with the thread we have currently, can’t wait to RP out what comes next!

@bunnysmultimuse: The thread with Sorano was fun, so I’d like to continue interactions (esp with the headcanons discussed) if you’re still up for it! That goes for Jellal with Meredy too!

@ultecr: Still have your post in my drafts, I know you said to take my time but even I know taking months is ridiculous lmao. I look forward to starting the Kaito/Ultear ship once I do reply, love your portrayal of Mavis too!

@herhorns:  I love seeing your Mira on my dash, especially her ships with Gajeel and Gray! Looking forward to interacting with Ravyn when we get to it, your art is awesome too!

@angelsoffiore: Welcome back man! Mizumi is a great OC and is why I approached you in the first place, so appreciate you still continuing our thread after so long. Hope to interact more with Mizumi, your other OCs, and your Laxus too!

[hirokiyuu]

goro akechi. or akira?

I REBLOGGED THAT AND THEN WENT TO WORK BUT

ill do BOTH wwww

goro!

favorite thing about them: his murderous rage (i wish this was a joke)

least favorite thing about them: status among the dead. realtalk i honestly think he was handled clumsily esp at the end but. u kno.

favorite line: “we couldve been great rivals perhaps even friends” which is made even better by him rapidly descending into screaming frothing rage @ ren. its good.

brOTP: f u t a g o. like. i really love them getting along well and their dynamic in sae’s palace is good. but also the Pain Potential is (chef’s finger kiss)

OTP: AKSH people who wear masks learning to love both the act and the actor its so good. i love them. its so g

nOTP: i would prefer not to ever have to see romo sae/goro ever again LOL

random headcanon: suicide warning / if uve read pef u already kno this but i think his mother having committed suicide in a way he takes as “drowning” is. fucked up and also thematically appropriate given shido’s palace. water = death motif good esp given he closes the flood doors to die

unpopular opinion: aus where he’s just a Pleasant Boy are 100% out of character and have nothing to do w/the actual akechi in game

song i associate with them: number one goro song is probably broken heartbeats sound like breakbeats bc i think the general atmo fits + a lot of the lyrics are good w/rt his various facades etc (plunge your hand rip out my spine / replace it with a uv light / so i can be the beacon of hope you’d always expected) while also getting the violence i feel like is really entrenched in his character. lifetime achievement award and the mind electric are both also good. 

favorite picture of them: every picture (im sorry im lazy and not going to do this. hes beautiful and i love him and also a loser)

aaaand ren

favorite thing about them: hes so PRETTY. realtalk i like how even tho he’s a silent protag he has a Lot more personality than most silent protags. the fact that he canonically dislikes mishima is so good!! you can’t be nice to him!!! akira himself doesnt like mishima and thats so interesting to me!!! he has preferences + rships outside of the player!!!! its good!!!!!

least favorite thing about them: i dont kno if i have anything i necessarily Dislike. not enough murderous rage to be one of my faves but hes a good boy.

favorite line: i like the part in the beginning where he n ryuji get stopped by the cops and he pretends they never met

brOTP: him and all  the thieves are good but im especially weak for the original quartet. i feel like they get ren at his least masked if that makes sense??? and i really like that. theyre a good quartet. him and ann esp are good

OTP: would i wrote 50k for a ship if it werent my otp for both character. on a side note i like ren being mildly suspicious but finding goro honestly kind of grating until he kind of realizes goros a dick and then likes him more

nOTP: i actually thinking ftb having a crush is cute but im not v big on it requited

random headcanon: tryng to rmbr which things ive written abt ren are canon and which are pefcanons. o i like to think the first time he ever tries a cartwheel outside the metaverse hes Really Bad at it.

unpopular opinion: not necessarily unpopular but smth i dont usually see done in fic that i think is v good for the character is him kind of dealing w/internalized homophobia? desire to keep his head down/be “normal” manifesting itself that way is interesting

song i associate with them: idk if i have a song i associate with Ren, Specifically, but caring is creepy originally made it on pef playlist as ren pov rather than goro wwwwwwww

favorite picture of them: i like when he wears the lei

[dragimal]

How different are the crybaby characters compared to the characters in the manga? I haven't been able to watch it since I only have hulu and amazon prime.

(if u ever wanna watch it I could maybe try to set up a rabb.it for anyone interested and mooch my roommate’s netflix for a few viewing events. big maybe tho, I haven’t had a lot of personal time lately, and I don’t see that changing soon..)

for my own convenience I’m gonna try to do a compare/contrast list (+ personal “ideal” versions b/c why not). also, I must repeat my disclaimer that it’s been a minute since I read the og manga so some details may be warped by my memory

Ryo:

OG pre-Satan: 

environmentalist, conspiracy theorist, flips wildly between completely neutral/dead-pan and hysterical (which could be for any emotion– he could be hysterically happy, hysterically mad, etc.). he’s not the best strategist and often makes snap decisions (ex– doesn’t super give a shit abt blowing his cover, as long as he can make a clean/quick getaway). his “sacrifice the few for the many” approach is questionable, but ultimately logical in a battle for the survival of humanity as a whole. more likely to seriously injure than outright murder people. pretty desperate to keep Akira by his side. he’s basically the right image below

OG post-Satan: 

they actually face their mistakes and realize that by trying to wipe out humans, they turned into a version of the God they opposed, ultimately trying to wipe out a whole race of beings that deserve to live as much as anyone else, despite their faults. this is ultimately a lesson on Satan’s hubris, and lends to a thematically satisfying (and soul-crushing) ending

(x)

Crybaby pre-Satan: 

basically cool/collected throughout, with very few moments where he loses his cool (or has much emotion at all, really). seems like he knows what he’s doing most of the time, and most of his decisions seem to have a far-reaching goal that was planned ahead. indiscriminately kills everyone who poses even the slightest threat to his plans, despite the fact that his plans are supposedly for the sake of humanity. doesn’t seem super attached to Akira, beyond using Akira for his goals. basically the left image above

Crybaby post-Satan: 

Akira apparently taught Satan that love exists and is good? idk, the whole point of the OG plot was that Satan’s love of the demons pushed them to hate humanity. I think this is actually the main structural change that ruins the entire demon/Satan-revenge arc of Crybaby irreparably, b/c basically everything falls apart if Satan doesn’t feel any love or even obligation to the demons. like, if Satan doesn’t love demons already, then what’s even the point? as can be seen by the lack of cohesion/logic in anything Satan or their lackeys do, Crybaby clearly doesn’t know either. it’s also not a super effective approach when u can’t actually feel the love Satan/Ryo apparently has for Akira, and have to have it spelled out in the last 5 minutes of the series :/

Ideal Ryo: 

OG Ryo, in all respects (aesthetics, personality, etc.). tho I do like Crybaby’s puffy white coat, that’s 100% fashion-disaster OG Ryo

Akira:

OG pre-Amon: 

very skittish– will avoid confrontation as much as possible, but will still stick around to protect those he cares abt, even if he’s scared shitless. wary of weird stories abt demons, and rightfully questions their validity

OG post-Amon:

(edited w/ thessaliah’s input)

fiercely protective of humans until he realizes the atrocities they’re committing against themselves and devilmen, at which point he completely denounces humanity. thus, shows a strong sense of justice over forgiveness

Crybaby pre-Amon: 

obliviously cheerful and trusting– I’m legitimately not sure if he’s actually brave or just too dense to recognize danger as it comes. doesn’t question weird stories abt demons, and is ready to step right into the frying pan w/ barely an ounce of information beforehand

Crybaby post-Amon: 

(edited w/ thessaliah’s input) 

cries a lot, which I think is a nice visual metaphor for his inner humanity. much more forgiving of humanity, even when he sees humans at their worst.

Ideal Akira: 

personality-wise, I’d have to say OG, particularly for pre-Amon. while Crybaby pre-Amon is kinda cute in his obliviousness, I prefer the Akira who will knowingly jump into danger for those he loves, despite how scared he is. + I was so mad when Crybaby Akira didn’t question ANYTHING abt Ryo’s demonic explanations, like wtf dude u just swallowed that shit hook line and sinker, huh? 

on reflection, I also prefer OG post-Amon, b/c I think it’s a lot more soul-crushing to see this ~largely~ idealistic character finally finally get worn down to the point of just giving up on those he was trying to protect. Crybaby’s overly-idealistic approach isn’t necessarily bad, but I do think it smooths out Akira’s rough edges a bit too much for my liking. tho Crybaby def has a leg-up thematically when it comes to the crying, I love that so much

aesthetically I could go for either, but I think I’d ideally love the look of everything Crybaby Akira + OG sideburns/mullet lmfao

Miki:

OG: 

prideful as a personality trait, thus takes any slight as a personal offense. unashamed, but simultaneously defensive of her abilities (namely has some internalized misogyny in the beginning, which she eventually overcomes). impulsive and somewhat socially dense, which leads her to being unintentionally harsh in situations where she thinks she’s trying to enact “tough love”. could be read as (obnoxiously) selfish in situations where she wants Akira to fit her standards, and doesn’t question his changed state (and more importantly, doesn’t miss the ‘old Akira’)

Crybaby: 

proud of her accomplishments, but not necessarily defensive of her position– she’s secure enough in her abilities to not feel threatened. thoughtful of those around her and what they may be going through. possibly too trusting, considering the whole situation w/ her agent. actually seems aware and somewhat wary of Akira’s changed state, even if she does like it

Ideal Miki: 

this one’s tough b/c as much as I hate OG Miki and Akira’s relationship, there are certain negative traits that I think give OG Miki a more dynamic character than Crybaby. like OG’s socially dense, unintentionally harsh approach is p interesting to see, esp if it’s highlighted as a point of growth for her. of course, I want to completely trash the way OG Miki treats Akira in terms of throwing him into dangerous situations and harshly criticizing his pre-Amon character, but I wouldn’t necessarily mind seeing her sometimes harshly criticize Akira’s decisions in a way that is clearly framed as her trying to help Akira (even if it isn’t necessarily the most ideal approach). I also love OG Miki’s bubbly, unashamed personality, which is a gr8 contrast to her harsh approach to social situations

as for Crybaby, I fuckin ADORE Miki’s relationship w/ Miko, which I think only works the way it does b/c Crybaby Miki is securely proud, not defensively prideful like OG. plus, OG Miki’s defensive pride is p damn annoying to me, ESPECIALLY her internalized misogyny, god I want that completely trashed. yeah, OG eventually grows past the misogyny, but it feels less like satisfying character development, and more like a relief, like, “oh thank god she ain’t pullin’ that shit anymore” 

I suppose, given all this, my ideal Miki is one that combines OG’s social harshness/denseness (to a logical/understandable degree), bubbly temperament, and impulsiveness, with Crybaby’s secure pride in her abilities and actual physical prowess (+ Crybaby’s love of cats, which is adorable and relatable)

Miko:

OG: 

tbh I had to look her up again b/c I completely forgot her arc/personality. idk if that’s on her actually being a boring character, or if it’s just the fact that her arc was dropped in the middle of all the other wild bullshit of the main plot wayyyy at the end of the series

anyways, she’s a former delinquent trying to reform herself, but her old gang/posse won’t leave her alone, and she’s all stressed out over being half-demon. I don’t remember her personality necessarily being affected by the demon, which is kinda odd. also her demon form is some tiddy/pussy-volcano ridiculousness

Crybaby: 

it’s worth noting that the actual, literal OG Miko makes a very brief appearance in Crybaby as one of the half-demon test subjects held captive by scientists– volcano-tits and all. personally, I count this as OG Miko’s actual Crybaby counterpart, but for the sake of comparing important characters, I’ll be comparing OG Miko to main Crybaby Miko since they share a name and an actual arc in each respective series

Crybaby Miko is insecure and wants so very badly to prove herself to others, especially Miki. this is especially potent considering Miko’s actual name is Miki, but she’s forced to stick with Miko as a name b/c Miki’s popularity/prowess overshadows any other potential Miki. post-demon, this jealousy manifests itself as an insatiable competitive streak, as Miko now has the ability to not only reach Miki, but surpass her level. Miko eventually realizes that at least part of her insecurity was misplaced affection for Miki. thus, part of Miko’s desire to be on the same playing field as Miki was so she could feel worthy of potentially dating her. also, Miko’s demon form is some kinda spider creature

Ideal Miko: 

just b/c of her personal/thematic connection to Miki, I’d have to vote Crybaby Miko for almost all traits. I rly love her arc in Crybaby, and she’s a lot more personally connected to the plot than OG Miko is (considering OG Miko appears super late in the game, and barely interacts w/ Devilman). 

though I do like the idea of a former delinquent trying to reform herself– it might be kinda interesting to integrate that into Crybaby Miko. maybe have her be a delinquent before she met Miki (I can’t remember how long they knew each other in Crybaby, but I’m thinking maybe have Miko be a middle school delinquent, then a reformed high-schooler). it might be especially interesting to see how Miko struggles to restrain a delinquent side that was used to getting what she wanted, then have it all fall apart when she’s merged with a demon 

Crybaby Miko is also more interesting aesthetically, in all her forms (human, devilman, and demon). I’m esp super gay for her devilman form, while her full-demon form is such a huge improvement on tiddy-volcanoes. I do like OG’s hat tho, I wish Crybaby could have OG’s hat

Bullies/Rappers:

OG:

a little fuzzy on the details of these guys as well, but I mostly remember their overall arc

in the OG, these guys are straight-up bullies/delinquents, and aren’t there to fuck around. at first, they’re extremely aggressive towards Akira and Miki, and straight-up threaten to rape Miki. later on, once Akira gains their respect (and the world starts goin to shit), they become reliable, rough-around-the-edges friends, and try to protect Akira and Miki as much as they can

Crybaby:

these guys seem like harmless, disenfranchised rappers. they could be read as dangerous when they first approach Miki, but I honestly don’t think they would have done anything even if Ryo hadn’t intervened– I think they were just trying to scare her. Kukun in particular plays a significant role in Miko’s arc (however brief). they all rap about the hardships and injustices of society in a way that fits p well w/ the plot

Ideal bullies:

I rly love the OG bullies for how they go from aggressively antagonistic to aggressively protective of Akira and Miki. however, I rly hate exactly how aggressive they start out (namely, their willingness to straight-up rape Miki), which kinda sours their connection to Akira/Miki later on. it’s, uh, hard to forget something as serious as that, even when the ppl in question do seem to have changed some

as for Crybaby, I rly love how the rappers are a misfit group that makes comments abt society at large as the story progresses. + the rapping itself is p damn entertaining. I also, of course, adore Kukun’s relationship w/ Miko

it’s hard to say which I like more, but I’d def have to cut legitimate rape threats from the OG characters to truly appreciate them. as a way of merging some of their best traits, it might be interesting to see the stakes raised w/ the Crybaby rappers, and have them carry knives and make actual threats against Miki/Akira’s safety at first (again, w/o the rape threat,,), only to find out later it’s just a facade they put up for their own safety (but still won’t back down if they actually ARE up against trouble)

closing comment I guess

I think those are all the characters I feel like talking abt. I could talk abt other characters who got some significant changes (like Miki’s parents, or Akira’s parents), but I didn’t feel any particular way abt them in the OG or Crybaby, so they’re not rly worth my personal time ¯|_(ツ)_/¯

[no-mo-rules]

scenario where akechi was saved by his phantom-thief lover and they were shot instead of him? maybe they lost their eye? in their last conscious moments they murdered the cognitive goro before they collapsed, and theyre rushed to the hospital once they leave the metaverse. maybe the aftermath of that, in the hospital? (sorry i really love ur writing esp for akechi so... expect more akechi reqs in the future... he best boy...)

Just as a heads up, I’ve actually written something super similar to this request on my ao3. To make this feel different, I changed some little things around here to there. Follow this link if you want to read the other story.

Goro Akechi is not sure what he’s feeling.

He knows it’s bad, that much hecan tell from the get go, but he hasn’t given it enough thought to categorise itinto pretty little boxes. The past few hours have been too chaotic to even try.There’s more time to think about it now, he supposes, while you’re asleep – andthe blaring thrum of his heart in his chest doesn’t sound through his body withthe force of a drum. He feels the cold skin on your hand, and it seems ill andsickly compared to the warmth he usually associates with trailing his fingersalong your palms.

It all comes back to the momenthe loses control of himself; when the difference between inflicting andreceiving pain thins to an incomprehensible, mid-battle haze until theadrenaline recedes along with the strength in his legs. He falls to the floor.

“Please don’t fight us anymore,”you say, standing over him. His initial reaction is to laugh in your face.

Humour.

It is funny, isn’t it? Becauseit’s long before your first confession that he’s wanted to do this. Eversince his birth, his life has been an absolute misery: his father abandonshim, his mother hates him, yells at him, uses his fear to control hisbehaviour in front of others, and eventually, he walks in on her hanging from a ceiling. He spends the first six years of his lifehungry and cold, and the next eleven after that lonely and scared.

Think about ratios here, hetries to justify; two days can’t change a man, even if it was two days ago that-

“I love you, Goro Akechi.”

Suddenly, the laugh in histhroat feels like a lump.

Fear is the second emotion. It comes when the Phantom Thieves crowdaround him, because he feels small; curled up on the floor and holding everywhere that aches like the same lonelychild from all those years ago.

“If everyone knew how much of acry-baby you are, they’d tell me to leave you,” his mother says, and walks outof the room to smoke a cigarette.

Right now, Goro Akechi isn’tcrying.

“Now that you know who I am,you should leave me,” he says. You’re staring down at him, and you don’t looklike you want to acknowledge his words. You just look kind of sad.

The resolute tone in his voicedoes nothing to portray the tremors inside of him. On repeat, like a brokentape recorder, all he can think is ‘please don’t.’ It’s pathetic, it really is,because it’s only now that he’s lost and grovelling at your feet that he wantsyour pity. By all means, you should leave him.

You really, really should.

He’s scared of your response, because even ifhe’s not scared of dying here, he is scaredof losing you, and he can’t imagine there’s any way to salvage yourrelationship when you’ve found out how he’s been pulling the strings.

“We’re not leaving you,” yousay.

Like water sinking into theearth, his dread disappears. He’sdumbstruck, because as much he was hoping (praying, begging, desperatelywishing) for this turn of events, he didn’t think it would actually happen.

“Why?” His voice is broken up.It comes out as tattered around the edges, far away from the confidence hetried so hard to emulate.

“You need our help too.” Youlook pained, and maybe a little unsure of yourself. “I want to help you.”

There’s something akin to joy, but it doesn’t last long. Before hecan say anything, his doppelganger comes.

He should know there’ssomething off about your face, about the way you’re standing slightly on yourtip toes with the muscles in your calves all tensed up and solid, but he’s gotother things to worry about. After all, he ison the receiving end of a gun.

He needs to play this right.

Fear comes again, and stays for a while. He fears a lot of thingsin that moment. He’s fears for your life, and it feels strange when justseconds ago he was so indifferent to it. It’s the driving force behind the wayhis face pulls into a grin that feels too tight for his face, and points thegun straight towards you. It’s the first time in his life he’s feared pullingthe trigger, and he fears the hurt expression on your face as he does it. Hefears the next decision he has to make, and that too, feels strange, because he’sso used to being ready to throw his life away. Maybe he’s been underestimatinghow much the human body wants to survive now that it’s come down to it. (Notthat it has a choice, anyway. He’s already made his decision.)

Acceptance is next. When he laughs, it’s because heknows there’s no way around it. This is the best-case scenario. They are thewinners, in every way. They’re kinder, more honest, and have more love to give.He swerves towards his doppelganger and fires the bullet.

The next few seconds are a madflurry of confusion. He can barelyremember them now, when there’s not so much as a painting on the blank, whitewall of the hospital room to distract him. He thinks maybe you’re the first oneto move, which makes sense, because if you and a bullet get to the same placeat the same time, then surely the bullet needs to be the one to go second.

There’s a shot, but that’sfine; it’s what he’s expecting. What he’s not expecting, however, is you comingout of formation to jump at his doppelganger with a knife aimed straight at hisgut, and the bullet to sink neatly into your skull.

There’s gasps, then panic. Pure, unadulterated panic.

Every part of him snaps.

“No!” He jumps towards you. Hisbreath comes out in short little gasps. With no absence in adrenaline, heshoves the other Akechi off and holds your body to his chest. Your eyes areopen, wide, wide open. You’re scared.

“No, no, no. Please don’t dothis,” he chokes out.

Blood drips down to where he’sholding your head in his hand. There’s already something wet on his face,blurry tears in his vision. “You’re not doing this.”

The rest of the Phantom Thievesstart acting quickly (and how typical is that, he thinks, that he’s the onebeing useless again.) Akira approaches him from behind and places a hand on hisshoulder.

“You hold her head,” he says.

The other Akechi coughs in thebackground, and spouts some incomprehensible mutter about betrayal, about howAkechi is worthless, and how the one person who loved him is going to pay for it. He’s dying quickly. You pulledthe knife out of his stomach as your fell back into Akechi’s arms, so the bloodfrom his stomach is coming out in little spurts that colour his khaki coat with a deep crimson. Spasmsgo through his legs as he coughs again, but that’s fine. He doesn’t matter. Youdo.

Ryuji picks up your legs, Akirapicks up your torso, and Akechi gently holds your head. He’s weak. Completelybroken, bruised, and everything hurts, but the adrenaline is still there. You’restill there too, and that’s what makes the difference. It’s all he needs, evenif the shaky tremors that run through his feet make every step feel wobbly.

“Don’t leave me,” he whispersinto your hair, and Ryuji looks at him with something that can’t be describedas anything more than pity. “Please, I love you.” (Like he’s trying to convinceyou to stay.)

“I still love you,” he says,taking your cold hand to his lips. The tick of the hospital clock feels too methodical. Fifteen minutes to twelve, it says, to remind him that everyone else has left long ago. “You’ll love me too, when you wake up,right?” The steady beeping line of the heart monitor doesn’t affect him. “Evenif this is all my fault.” The nurse that comes into the room and ushers him outcan’t stop him either, because he just waits outside and leans against the door until the nextmorning. “Don’t leave me. You can’t leave me,” he hums against the wall, overand over.

He’s not sure if denial is an emotion.

[aja154ever]

High School Star Musical/ Starmyu Event – 10/08/2017 Evening

Uwaaa. It’s been quite a long time since my last seiyuu event. I’ve only been attending GRANRODEO lives these past months (but that’s not bad at all!). Anyway, this fan report is quite late, because of work and stuff, but ofc I need to make this post for the record, and for my feelings. Also, thanks to fans who gave tweet reports that helped me remember more things.

 As usual, I used the seiyuu’s nicknames for convenience. Loooong report under the cut!              

Hoshitani Yuuta – Hanae Natsuki Nayuki Toru – Ono Kensho Tsukigami Kaito – Lounsbery Arthur Tengenji Kakeru – Hosoya Yoshimasa Kuga Shuu – Maeno Tomoaki Tatsumi Rui  – Okamoto Nobuhiko Sawatari Eigo  – Uchida Yuuma Inumine Seishiro  – Okitsu Kazuyuki Toraishi Izumi  – KENN Ugawa Akira – Matsuoka Yoshitsugu Ageha Riku – Shimazaki Nobunaga Hachiya So – Takanashi Kengo Kitahara Ren – Umehara Yuichiro Nanjo Koki – Takeuchi Shunsuke Otori Itsuki – Suwabe Junichi Yuzuriha Christian Lion – Toriumi Kousuke Saotome Ritsu – Okiayu Ryoutarou Futaba Taiga – Hoshi Souichiro

Honestly, I am not very much into Starmyu so I actually do not remember everyone’s names. I also do not know all the seiyuu. But don’t get me wrong, I like the anime as the story about working hard for dreams is just so close to heart. But the main reason why I decided to go to this event is because of the precious baby I’m protecting against the world, Hosoya Yoshimasa. Hosoyan is baaaaaaaaaaackkkkk!!!! I need to welcome him back so I wanted to show my support literally so I badly, really wanted to be there.

And I’m so glad I did. The event turned out to be more fun than I thought as I loved the characters and the seiyuu more.

Introduction

The cast first appeared in the following order:

Ancient, Kao Council, Team Sazanami and Yuzuriha, Team Hiragi, Team Otori

Team Otori gathered at the center to make the Stardust pose OMG!!!

Anyway, I would just like to give special mention to Tori-san’s live speaking in Yuzuriha way. His accent is really entertaining. Also, Kensho as Nayuki OMG seeing and hearing it live is just soooo cute; I’m not even a fan of Nayuki and Kensho but I really liked it! Another one I found cute was Noburin! I’ve always loved his voice as Haikyuu’s Noya and his real voice is actually close to that anyway, so it’s really refreshing to see and hear him as Tatsumi.

Also, SuwaJun called out the boys in the audience, with his Otori-senpai voice and tone, and surprisingly there were a good number of boys in the crowd who responded well. He then also called out the girls and was ofc answered with a loud yeyyyyy. 

Game Corner

The cast was divided into two teams, A and B, with members decided through drawing lots.

The game was basically guessing who is the person standing behind you as the guesser wears Tengenji’s eye mask (lol so cute).

SuwaJun and Tori-san took the MC roles in this part so the players were the remaining 16 cast.

Team A first sat on their respective chairs as they put their eye masks on. Team B then went behind them to attach their names on the stand behind Team A members. They were free to choose to whom they want to attach it.

The guessing team then asks one question so they can get hints on who the person is. However, a voice changer is used on the answerer so they cannot guess based on their voices.

They asked interesting out-of-this-world questions that I do not know how they managed to get hints from such. The ones that I got left in my memory were:

Guesser Uchida: If you would carry me, would it be bridal style or piggyback style? Umehara: My hips would ache if I carry you bridal style, so piggyback, but anyway lose weight first!

((Ume-san was so harsh really lol))

Guesser Okiayu: Regarding date plans, what’s a good word to ask a girl out on a date? Kensho: Ahmmm… Okiayu: In a cool way so don’t say “ahmmmm”! Kensho: On the 17th… are you free?

((Kensho was so cute damn it, acting like he’s shy))

Guesser Noburin: What’s your favorite Gundam? Hosoyan: Barbatos

((Take note that most of the seiyuu present has been a cast in the Gundam series, so you can get the hint based on the answer. Hosoyan played a character in Gundam Iron-blooded Orphans where Barbatos is the main mobile suit))

Zakki was next to guess then he asked the same thing Hoshi: Strike Freedom!

((Hoshi-san played as Kira Yamato in Gundam SEED where he piloted Strike Freedom))

Guesser Maenu: What do you think about Maeno Tomoaki? KENN: He’s not always honest, he’s bad-mouthed, but I like him.

((The whole venue screams KYAAAAAAAAA))

Team A got 50 points in total, 5/8 correct answers.

 Next is Team B.

Guesser Hosoyan: This is a serious question. Which do you prefer, a do-S or do-M girl? Noburin: I usually prefer do-S but sometimes I would also like a do-M

((What is up with this “serious” question Hosoyan???))

Guesser Umehara: What’s the weakest part of your body? Zakki didn’t answer first as he consulted with Tori-san regarding his answer. Zakki: Ahmmm… the left… Tori-san touched/poked Zakki’s left chest/nipple. Zakki shyly laughs as he steps backward. SuwaJun: Okay. It’s his left nipple, right?

((LOL I was laughing so hard Zakki please why are you like that!!))

Guesser Hoshi: What’s the kind of relationship you have with me? Hanae: Ahmmm… 15 years ago I was an entrance examinee for high school. On the other hand, (laughs uncontrollably), I can’t say anything more than that! SuwaJun: (repeats Hanae’s answer) So on the other hand 15 years ago ufufufufufu he can’t say anything more

((So basically Hanae-san was implying about the difference in their ages lol))

Guesser KENN: What do you think about me? Maenu: This ikemen! But I like him.

((The whole venue screams again KYAAAAAAAAA))

Guesser Okiayu: What song do you sing when you take a bath? Yoshitsugu-san also consulted Tori-san first before answering. Then he hums a melody as his answer. SuwaJun: It seems like a very sad song.

Team B only got 3/8 correct answers. So Team A won! Anyway, Okiayu-san’s answer after hearing Yoshitsugu-san’s sad hum was, “I want to hug this person right now.”

 Live Drama Voice Acting

The drama was basically about a contest (I’m sorry I missed the main word about what kind it is), but they were divided into teams of four.

The first part was about Hoshitani, Nayuki, Tsukigami, Shuu, and Tengenji talking about it. They were looking for other members to join Tsukigami and Nayuki and they found Tatsumi and Eigo.

The scene cuts to Eigo waking up sleeping Tatsumi.

Eigo: Ne, Tatsumi, wake up Tatsumi: Give me five more hours…

Eigo talks about the beauty of things when Tatsumi wakes up but Tatsumi says that those truly beautiful are things he can feel even when he’s asleep.

Then they started to sing ZOMG I didn’t expect that they would have a live performance WAIT OMG

Noburin and Uchida-kun sang The ELEGANCE.

Team Otori appeared after, astounded by the two.

Tengenji: Amazing. Do you do that (singing) every morning?

So Tatsumi and Eigo ended up joining Tsukigami and Nayuki in the team. They then performed Aozora SEASONS.

So on the day of the contest…

Toraishi and Inumine were the MCs of the contest.

Ancient and Kao council were on the same team together.

Tsukigami, Nayuki, Tatsumi, and Eigo were a team.

Hoshitani and Shuu were just part of the audience.

Well Tatsumi and Eigo were supposed to join, but they got into an unexpected affair on the day of the contest so they called saying they can’t go.

“Unexpected” affair being a sudden wedding.

Tengenji: A sudden wedding? What the hell is that?

So they had to make a way to fill up the members however the names cannot be changed so Tengenji and Ugawa ended up pretending to be Eigo and Tatsumi, respectively. This was really funny OMG esp with Tengenji because you know his usual way of speaking sounds proud and impolite, but he has to restrain and speak calmly and politely like Eigo. He would tend to speak in his usual way, then Ugawa would subtly remind him, “ne, Eigo?” To which he would respond, “So-sou desu ne, Tatsumi.”

((This live drama part really assured me that Hosoyan is already really okay. He spoke many lines and his role was more complicated than the others. You see, he was acting in the acting. I’m so proud of you Hosoyanby!))    

At first, only the two teams were originally part of the contest, but right before it began, the other team made a sudden appearance as Ageha, Hachiya, Kitahara, and Nanjo performed Storytellers.

((OMG if you didn’t know, Zakki is my ultimate husband in another world (being Nanase Haruka) so hearing him sing live for the first time is just too much for my heart. T.T He sounds pretty much the same in recorded and in live. Good voice Zakki huhuhu))

 So they then joined the contest.

Anyway, KENN as Toraishi was providing a lot of fan service, with his “koneko-chan” calls, winks, and kisses. Srsly KENN is so ikemen tho huhuhu

At first, Ageha thought that Hoshitani was part of the contest so he lost his will to join when he found out that Hoshitani is just watching.

The MCs then explained that the questions would be about Uozumi and Haruto, and that the prize of the winner is Uozumi and Haruto’s sign. With that, Ageha’s determination to join went back in a flash.

Ancient and Kao got the first question right about Haruto’s favorite sports being team sports since he’s not good in anything that doesn’t involve music.

Tsukigami team then got the second one about Uozumi’s favorite food being cold food. Nayuki cited an incident when Uozumi didn’t want his curry heated before eating.

Ageha has been giving really adorable reactions with gasps and short comments, expressing his worry and excitement in getting the prize. When the second question turned out to be about Uozumi, he coldly answered with, “I don’t know.”

The third question turned out to be the last, and so Nanjo and Kitahara started complaining that they haven’t gotten a point yet, and their extra performance earlier would be worthless if they don’t even get a point. They also added that if they happen to get the point, no one would be declared a winner as the teams would all be tied. So they suggested that the last question be worth ten thousand points. The MCs then agreed after they got the audience to chant “ten thousand points!”

Ancient and Kao ended up getting the point about Haruto. Anyway, for some reason (I forgot or I just didn’t understand) their team got disqualified. That made the Tsukigami team the winner with one point, but then the others complained that they should also be disqualified for the pretending Tengenji and Ugawa. So in the end, because the two other teams got disqualified, the remaining team won though they didn’t have any points! Ageha was so happy and with his loveable reaction, I believe everyone in the venue also got happy for him T.T

VTR parts in between

VTR clips were played in between segments. The characters appeared in their chibi forms, grouped together for free talk.

Some things I remember:

The Hardy group (Tengenji, Hachiya, Inumine, Todo, Chigira) used to eat together during audition break times. They would also casually teach one another. They teased Tengenji that they’re glad that he has gotten more friends. Ofc, tsundere Tengenji refuses to accept that he already calls them as friends. He also said that Todo and Chigira have other business today so they can’t attend the event. So apparently, he contacted them.

Inumine: As expected of Tengenji! Tengenji: Be-betsuni! I’m just doing it as the leader of the Hardy group… I’m not doing it for your sake, okay!

Hoshitani, Tsukigami, Shuu, and Toraishi were talking about their Middle School days. Hoshitani claimed that he wasn’t popular with girls at that time, but he had many friends who are girls. They would give him snacks, make bentos for him, and come to cheer for him in club events.

Tsukigami, Shuu, Toraishi: So he was just dense…

Apparently, Hoshitani was pretty popular lol

Ageha, Nayuki, And Ugawa were put together. Nayuki said that their combination is kind of weird and they wondered what they have in common.

Ageha: Ah! I found our common feature! Nayuki, Ugawa: What is it? Ageha: We’re all small (in height). *awkward laughing from the two* Ugawa: Well, that’s true but… Ageha: That’s fine, we’ll still get to grow taller Nayuki: Is Ageha’s family tall? Ageha: Yes Nayuki: I see. My family is generally small Ugawa: Mine is relatively normal, but recently since I’ve always been with Inumine, when I came home last time I think my family has gotten smaller Ugawa: My ideal height is Kuga’s Nayuki: Since I don’t grow muscle that much, my ideal build would be Yuzuriha-senpai’s. Ageha’s would of course be, Haruto-san’s height, right? Ageha: 187 cm… Ah, I still have to grow 23 more centimeters.

 The last VTR revealed the announcements:

Blu-ray Box of the first season out on Spring 2018

OVA for October 2018

Season 3 on 2019

KYAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Last Greeting

The cast then went back on stage now dressed in the Shadow and Lights Event shirt. It’s Hoshitani’s birthday on the 10th so they brought out a cake (see picture below!). They then said their words of goodbye one by one.

Maenu said that in the future, he would want to hold an event like this again, but hopefully with Hirakawa Daisuke-san and the other seiyuu as well.

((Aww Maenu so sweet T.T))

It was Arthur-san’s fourth performance of the day, as he was also in the musical and then in the noon event. But he said he got the energy to go on from the fans, and he feels that he can still go on for another performance.

((Srsly, otsukare-sama Arthur-san! You’re so adorable huhu. I can feel your love for Starmyu. Thank you!!!))

SuwaJun sang a few lines, earning KYAAAAAAAAAA from the crowd, as he wished to hold another event in the future.

Ume-san has ofc used his signature line, “guilty”, in every chance he got in the event, so ofc he ended the night with that. KYAAAAAAA

KENN/Toraishi: If we’re talking about stars, then it is here *points to self* *winks* *flying kiss* fangirls died* Okitsu-san repeats the same line with ever-energetic Inumine! Uchida-kun/Eigo: If we’re talking about stars, then it is here *gestures hand to Noburin/Tatsumi* Noburin/Tatsumi: Hi. I’m the star.

((KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HAHAHA I officially declare Tatsumi x Eigo as canon because these two have been teasing flirting from the start, in the VTR, in the drama parts OMG. I did not even notice them in the anime but I’m telling you their seiyuus are the captains of this ship so I’m really happy for the shippers of this fandom!))

Ok. That flow of goodbye greetings was really entertaining. Lol. Anyway, Hanae ended the greetings, with, “I don’t know of a way to give up on my dream!”

Awwww. Then they ended the night as the whole cast performed Gift.

As soon as the music started, SuwaJun came to Hanae’s side, putting his arm over Hanae’s shoulder. That was such a lovely sight! Otori-senpai and Hoshitani!!!!!!!!! T.T

Okay, so I’m a huge fan of Hosoyan’s singing voice (I have a whole blog post dedicated to that here) so I was really delighted when we got live performances earlier as I assumed that I would finally get to hear Hosoyan sing live later. So everyone actually sang in Gift, however, Hosoyan didn’t sing with the mic. Lol what. He was just smiling and waving his hands, singing in some parts, but all the time he was pointing the mic to the audience. Somehow, I came to the conclusion that due to medical conditions, maybe he cannot sing that much yet. I’m really worried, but Hosoyan still looked so happy. He was the only one who walked around the whole stage, going far to the right and left sides as he continued waving to the audience. Ok now I want to cry

In the end, team Otori with Otori-senpai gathered in the center, Hosoyan being late as he was busy waving on the left side of the stage, but then they put him in the center as they all put their arms over their shoulders. BEAUTIFUL.BEAUTIFUL. Welcome back Hosoyan!!!!!!!!

Photos/Posts from Official Accounts:

Uwaaaaaa. I didn’t really expect to enjoy the event this much as again I’m not that attached to Starmyu unlike the other seiyuu events I’ve attended. But then I found myself laughing all throughout the event. I really had a good time. But the most important thing to me is that I got to see Hosoyan. This isn’t the first time as I saw him in the BSD event last February, but seeing him in this event carries SO much meaning after his hiatus. He’s well, he’s fine, he’s okay. I literally had tears in my eyes when he appeared in the beginning. He has repeatedly said that he’s gonna take good care of his health during the intro and final greetings assuring the fans. He may not be 100% yet but what matters most is that he’s back, doing the things he loves. I also felt that his waving around the stage was like him saying, “I missed you! Please be assured that I’m okay now!”

Anyway, though waiting until 2019 is kinda hard, we got an OVA coming soon! I’m really happy that the story of our boys continues! Uwaaaa Starmyu gets to have a third season! Isn’t that amazing?

“When I receive something precious from Starmyu, I feel that I am cherished by Starmyu.”

For similar Japan-based original posts, you may follow me or track the #my original content tag on my blog.

[muzzleroars]

Hey, hey, hey. I love your Bad End AU and your art style and saw your most recent comic and thank you for the good angst. And may I ask, how do you see the Phantom Thieves of Hearts while under Yabboath's control? Is it basically the same for each Phantom Thief as Akira is in? Or is it different for the different tasks Yabboath gives them? And, if I maybe so selfish, would their outfits be similar to Akira's as well? Sorry for all the questions, I'm just really curious about your Bad End AU.

You never have to apologize for asking about my bad end au, I could talk about it for days!!! In fact...this answer got a little out of hand, so it’s under a cut to save people from scrolling fgbggg

 I actually have a few different “paths” for a bad end - in the full corruption path, the thieves would be pretty similar to Akira, where they’re brought back but fully under Yaldabaoth’s control, with Akira leading them more directly. Essentially, they would be extremely shallow versions of their real selves - they have the same personalities, but none of their morals or driving forces. They keep Akira happy and he believes he still has his friends with him and agreeing with his actions, which creates an Akira that has much less of his true self surviving. The thieves here, and in the bad end au in general, are really just “supplements” so Yaldabaoth can keep the power of the Trickster under his control. They support, assist, and comfort Akira, as well as just generally keep him company. He’s very sensitive to feeling as though he’s alone or his friends have abandoned him, even when he’s corrupted, so keeping them around is advantageous to Yaldabaoth so Akira doesn’t regain his rebellion.

In the gradual corruption path, the thieves return as their normal selves and it’s only Akira’s rebellion that’s been robbed from him. Things begin relatively normally, the thieves continue doing their work, but Akira begins to change and spends more and more time on his own in Mementos. He corrupts further and further, which leads to the group fracturing as Akira becomes more of a dictator. He doesn’t sound anything like he used to and he’s no longer egalitarian, but because the threats they’re fighting keep becoming increasingly horrifying and their loyalty to Akira, the thieves continue working in a growing state of unease. Desperate to help him but not understanding what’s caused the change, the thieves begin to corrupt one by one along with him, with Ryuji and Futaba most likely being among the first to fall because of how close they are to Akira. 

And just as Akira represents the Fool in reverse (taking a “sure” bet even if it sounds too good to be true to protect against the consequences of the unknown), all of the thieves degrade into their reversed positions which causes the group to crumble entirely. Ryuji no longer pushes the group forward with his passion, instead backtracking to only support all of Akira’s decisions. Futaba seals herself off and no longer offers to investigate Akira’s apparent issues - basically, she gets to the point where she only talks to him. Haru gives everything to assist Akira and make him comfortable, which adds to the support he receives from Ryuji already. Yusuke, likewise, is sapped of his own power when his objections fall on more and more deaf ears - he’s also one of the thieves that trusts in Akira the most, so he begins to give his power over to him as Akira becomes increasingly authoritarian. Makoto is swayed at this point and stops listening to her instincts telling her something is very wrong, instead keeping it to herself to keep harmony in a group that largely supports Akira without hesitation by now. And finally, Ann, disconnected from everyone else, only falls when she’s left all alone despite her misgivings. I don’t really think Morgana would be with them anymore and, if he is, it’s a fake created by Yaldabaoth to, again, keep Akira happy and in line. Goro, already on the outside of the thieves, isn’t influenced by Akira’s corruption, and so my comic can apply to this path of the AU. These two paths offer little hope of a good end, as in the first, the thieves are entirely puppets and in the second, only Goro would remain to oppose them, and he simply wouldn’t have the power to defeat them + Yaldabaoth on his own...though I think he would try, since his life is borrowed at that point anyway. 

And then there’s the “good” end path, which I sort of went with for the comic! The thieves all recognize something is wrong with Akira, discussing it among themselves and trying to seek a solution with no place to start. They try to reign him in gently, but Akira begins to move on his own, eventually disappearing for days at a time and when he returns, it’s like another piece of him is missing. He spends more time in the Metaverse than he does in reality and, one day, he never comes back (He takes up residence in Mementos, where I imagine Yaldabaoth keeps him company with his cognitive version of the thieves. Akira, in this state, is so far gone that he believes them to be real). The thieves are scared he’s dead or possibly worse, so they go into Mementos to search for him, but they find it far more hostile without him now. They have to take several passes at it, and on one of these missions, they run into Goro fighting through Mementos on his own. They’re shocked to find him alive, but he tells them it’s all Akira’s doing (he’s more clued in since he was literally resurrected, rather just being saved through altering cognition), and he’s furious with the decision. He refuses to work with the thieves, who are looking for Akira to attempt to reason with him after they hear his explanation of what he did. Goro believes he’s beyond redemption with what he’s done, considering it a betrayal toward himself, the Phantom Thieves, and the entire public at large, so he’s therefor abandoned his justice. The scene in the comic comes after Goro manages to travel through the whole of Mementos to find Akira, who explains his choices and his deal with Yaldabaoth, furthering Goro’s hatred of him in this state. He definitely tries to kill him but it’d be near impossible to succeed on his own given he’d be fighting Akira and Yaldabaoth (yea I’m a sucker for “everybody lives” but if Goro did succeed, I can see it either 1. Slowly degrading Yaldabaoth’s control but never really enough to make a real change - there would just be some people that manage to escape his prison but are lost in a world without free will or 2. Reality destabilizing to a dangerous point). This allows the thieves to make it to him in an attempt at a rescue mission where they would try to get him back to reality in order to break some of Yaldabaoth’s control over him. However...in this state, Akira isn’t exactly suited to existing in reality, which leads to a lot of unforeseen consequences as the thieves try to find their leader in the puppet Yaldabaoth’s turned him into. Goro doesn’t believe he exists any more in any meaningful way and even if he did, he figures it’s pointless to try to draw him out - Goro no longer believes Akira would be strong enough to bear the weight of his guilt.

Wow ok that was long but!!! I’m just very passionate about the bad end and I’m so glad you like my ideas for it ;o; Thank you for letting me ramble and for your sweet words!!! It means a lot to me esp since I was really excited about making the comic!!

[goodestboyryuji]

I PLAYED MORE GAEM AND THERE ARE SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

FINISHED SAE’S PALACE

can we talk about how fuckin HOT shadow sae is???? the fuck??????????? HOW DID NO ONE COMMENT ON HER ATTIRE i was expecting ryuji to be like DAMN MAKOTO INVITE ME OVER MORE

i was like 300 degrees of done with akechi in that palace btw also even if i didn’t know that he was a bad dude it’s so fuckin obvious bc he’s callin all the shots and is like ‘ohhh let’s wait until the LAAAST day but seeeee here are my DETECTIVE reasonsss’ like fuck off akechi ur shady af

i started to feel a little sympathetic towards akechi when he was like ‘you’ll keep her safe, right?’ to makoto at the start of the fight but then he’s just so fuckin PRETENTIOUS

we made our sae squad makoto, akechi, ryuji, and obvs akira which felt poetic lmao

i was  about to die with all the ryuji interaction tho and i think it’s cause i was just thirsty from my long hiatus. but like when ryuji says akira is a quiet dude but can handle himself???? with it. WITH IT.

also replaying the opening scene is so hella fun. i will listen to ryuji say ‘shut it, inari!!!’ a hundred times if i’m allowed

*mouth too close to the mic* goro akechi trying out for the part of light yagami aaaand action

ok on the real the whole cognition vs. real thing started to go over my head by the end lmao

I KNEW AKECHI SHOT US IN THE HEAD BUT GODDAMN HE JUST....SHOT US IN THE HEAD

ok but the most important thing

everyone?? when the news is coming out that we’ve died??? i realize now that they all know the truth but GODDAMN WAS MY HEART KILLING ME. ESP RYUJI BC HE LOOKED LIKE HE WAS GONNA CRY. ALSO DUDE IF U KNEW HE WAS OK WHY DID U ALMOST CRY.

also when the shopkeeper is like ‘ryuji are you trying out for track and field again are you still running’ my heart was like ‘shopkeeper lady don’t do this to me’ AND HE WAS SO GODDAMN SWEET

yusuke in front of the subway going “oh wow” i was like “is he gonna jump”

ok ok but what REALLY matters is: when we come back

and ryuji is like !!!!!!

and RUNS TO US and is THE ONLY ONE TO DO SO

AND GIVES US THAT GOOD OL SIDE HUG and PLANTS HIMSELF RIGHT AT OUR SIDE LIKE NO PERSONAL BOUNDARIES

AND JUST STARES AT US FONDLY THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE CUTSCENE

I SWEAR TO GOD OTHER CHARACTERS TURN THEIR ATTENTION TO WHOMEVER IS TALKING BUT RYUJI JUST WATCHES US NEARLY THE WHOLE TIME HE LOVES US SO MUCH

i have so much more yelling to do but just wanted y’all to know that i’M ALMOST DONE AND I LOVE THIS GAME SO FUCKING MUCH

[koniiro]

i feel you people act like goro is evil when the point was he...wasnt his dad was the big bad in the game in the first place yet no one brings him up or they joke about him "having daddy issues" when he was neglected and traumatized because of him. goro is morally gray as hell (hence his persona is "robin hood" he did bad things to stop someone actually evil) and hes such an interesting and good character to me and one of my favs since the games original release

I’m going to put the rest of your ask and my answer under Read More.

i also dont get why the fandom compares him to light yagami and adachi restlessly as if they cant understand or analyze his character well at all. theres a huge difference between a traumatized kid being used as a puppet and a grown ass man who killed people, mainly women who wouldnt follow his desires, of out his own boredom in life and light hardly makes sense besides its a joke about goros hair 

fandom acts like goro is a real person and hurt them personally or smth its really odd esp since the thieves reached out to him during their fight because they knew his villain act was dishonest and they were going against the same guy. everyone wanted him to find redemption but in the end goro killed himself instead of killing his only friends in life he was a kid who fucked up not adachi 2.0

but yea sorry for the long messages its just??? fandoms cant understand absolutely evil abusive characters from more morally gray characters and act like liking goro is evil when he literally got #1 in the official popularity poll after the games release in japan over akira because though theres some flaws in the writing he was a good character and i love him a lot

Not only that, Loki himself is also a morally grey deity and Goro’s color in the chat is also grey. His outfit goes from White Prince to Black Knight. Atlus never tried to hide his true nature. That’s why he’s also one of my faves too, he’s very fascinating to analyze. 

That’s because they are fixated in a certain trail of thought. And it’s exactly how you have said. I’ve also seen people comparing Goro to Kaworu when in fact he’s more similar to Shinji. 

I agree with you, except I don’t think he saw them as friends, the only person he liked but refused to admit was Joker. Even then, his relationship with Joker is confusing in many aspects. It doesn’t help the fact his coop is automatic and Joker is a silent protagonist. But I’m sure what they said to him touched him in the end. Otherwise he wouldn’t put a stop to his cognitive self.

Goro needed to be worked on better, he lacked some depth. I’m hopeful a new release or DLC may approach his character better. 

[seishirosakurazuka]

Okay, but Suoh/Nokoru?!?

hey grey-faced friend, i made some terrible life choices yesterday and now i feel like death warmed over and then frozen and then only partially warmed over in the microwave but the inside is still cold but you don’t care because everything is bad, but you know what warms my semi-thawed heart? it’s this. it’s suoh & nokoru.

i always assume all my fave character tropes are super obvious but the most-most-most favorite of mine is probably idiot king-figure (which pairs nicely with a rogue/trickster/con archetype) & exasperated but loyal to the death follower, in any kind of iteration. (inda & evred but inda is the sunshine god of evred’s life, costis & gen, jean & locke, enjolras & grantaire, gawain & lancelot, lancelot & arthur, the entire ending of crime & punishment, illya & napoleon tv edition, etc etc etc etc.) anyway. point being is i am weak to long-time friends who would die for each other but can’t seem to Talk Directly To Each Other and are in my heart definitely 10 years pining for each other.

here is a list of things about suoh & nokoru that get me every fucking time:

how nokoru is the boss of everything but suoh is one person who can defs boss him around and make him take care of himself

neither one can stand to see the other hurting esp when it’s stupid things they do to protect the other aka they’re an old married couple

at the end of the world suoh (and akira!) are right there by nokoru’s side and when i was fifteen and waiting on a ride home from school in the hs atrium i’d read FFN Clamp stories on my old blackberry on school wifi and one of them was the three of them in a world where kamui loses the apocalypse and i cry thinking abt it right now

suoh met nokoru and was like THIS BOY IS MY ENTIRE LIFE!!! FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES THIS IS MY IDIOT. and honestly. honestly

they are both very good people who balance each other out

i love nagisa-jo & all but....... nokoru helping set them up........... never ever revealing his true feelings generally, trying to play strategy bc he’s in charge of so many other important things his wants don’t much matter.................. that’s such a gay pining move

actually nokoru’s whole elaborate save-the-ladies passion seems very gay to me for reasons im not well enough to elaborate on but it seems like the typical gay-coded Ruse of being over-interested but never Actually Investing or having a Real Relationship u feel me

i actually literally need to go be horizontal and lie down but i will gladly talk abt nokoru and suoh anytime or just clamp school detectives

[muzzleroars]

with the daldabaoth au thing, imagine how hurt akira might be at first realizing goro wants to kill his dad :( he might even feel used like goro only liked him to get close to his dad

I ACCIDENTALLY JUST KIND OF RAMBLED ABOUT THIS AU BECAUSE I’VE BEEN LOVING IT SO LIKE. HERE’S SOME GODHUNTER DRAMA FOR YOU.

YEA that’s pretty much exactly how it goes ;o; akira is really fascinated by humanity and he loves to make friends, he loves to help people with his unique perspective, but he’s also definitely very guarded considering he knows what would happen if anyone found out who he is. so, very much like in canon, akira is great at getting others to open up to him, but he rarely does the same in return, too afraid that any personal details will be looked into and he’ll be discovered by the wrong people. as a cognitive being, akira does have a little bit of insight into the emotions and motivations of others, but being in reality really messes with his ability to be totally accurate (yaldabaoth retains this ability to a much higher degree, but he still has plenty of trouble himself as surviving in reality presents different issues for him), so he’s navigating social relationships with a lot less insight than he’s used to. initially he gains an interest in goro due to his minor celebrity status (akira is obviously drawn to popularity due to the public’s influence), and goro is interested in turn for, again, the same reasons in canon: akira is fascinating to speak with and his opinions often surprise goro. despite the fact that he really does seem to be a trend follower, goro notes that he often has very different ideas than most on whatever topic is popular, waxing incredibly philosophical about different viral trends in a way that’s oddly intriguing. and for his part, akira sees a perception in goro that’s rare for humans, an unparalleled acumen and the ability to mold himself to what the public wants in an utterly flawless way in order to achieve his fame while the real goro remains far and away from that persona. they both begin opening up to each other, letting their guards down, and it’s the exact perceptive nature that akira admires in goro that leads him to become suspicious of who akira really is. after all, despite their growing intimacy, goro never even learns where akira lives, let alone goes to see it, and akira has nothing to say of his family, his history, or his personal life. his friends at school know nothing either - ryuji and ann both shrug their shoulders to the questions, saying they’ve never seen akira’s home...although he has mentioned his dad once or twice, mostly about how he has a strict curfew and couldn’t stay out with them. it’s the most goro’s heard too...and he knows it’s not right, but he goes to dig into akira’s school records to find the information scant and impossible, fake addresses and fake names, “akira kurusu” not seeming to exist outside of shujin academy’s files along with the parent listed. neither of them exist...and goro understands the metaverse, having to achieve the fame he has in order to travel to the depths and find the shrine that had been abandoned - akira, obsessed by trends in a way that seems unnatural given the opinions and intelligence he’s demonstrated time and again. he almost wonders if akira himself might be god, but why would he go around inserting himself into humanity so openly? goro spends time debating how to question him without arousing suspicion, but once he receives intel that it’s suspected god has a child, he’s almost certain that’s exactly who akira is and the father he only mentions in passing, the one who’s never been seen or heard from himself, must be the creature goro’s looking for. 

it marks a shift in their relationship, goro hesitating in his mission for such personal, sentimental reasons, but no one else has a clue where to find god or his child, so he does have the luxury of keeping his silence for a time. however, akira notices the shift, sensitive to emotion and intention, and he begins to feel something...wrong about goro, flashes of anger, hatred, disgust directed toward akira...feelings of grief and guilt that come with them and it frightens him, it makes him distance himself from goro despite the pain it causes him. goro almost figures it’s for the best...yet he knows if he makes his move, if he tells the organization he works for that he found him, akira will suffer too, he’ll be ended with his father. so he tells himself he needs to be sure, that akira will only be killed if he truly is god’s child and this isn’t all a mistake that could see his life taken for no reason, so all that’s left to find is where he truly lives and confront whatever’s inside for himself. it’s stupid, it doesn’t make sense, if he does find himself in god’s residence, he’ll only have himself to kill that miserable creature without knowing what it might be capable of. yet...he tracks akira, follows him and finds his home over the course of days as akira often takes multiple and ever changing lines to arrive in his neighborhood, a precaution that makes goro’s heart sink as it only serves to be another nail in this coffin. but once he knows, all it takes is going to the home when akira isn’t present, forcing himself in and quietly, quickly with wide eyes and sweating palms searching each room...but when the upper floors yield nothing, he realizes all that’s left is the basement...and of course that thing would live in the basement, he’s seen the throne it kept in the bowels of that dungeon it called home. yaldabaoth had sensed goro’s presence long before he forces open that door, however, an unwelcome and unknown human filled with such conflicting emotions they induce a headache in the god. and in truth, that irrationality and unpredictability is somehow worse than a human totally intent on killing him - it makes motivations unclear, it makes the ailing god more agitated than he should be, and it’s an emotion not lost on akira, who rarely feels anything but composure from his father. how stupid had he been, he thinks, rushing home as fast as he can, he knew something was wrong with goro, he knew he had said too much and felt that sudden shift of emotion between them but he ignored it, he just tried to run instead of alerting his father to his missteps so that they might have left this city. but...he had hoped to be wrong, that he was reading things wrong as he so often does and besides...his father would be safe, he’s too powerful to fall isn’t he? (but akira knows being in reality has made him sick, he knows his father doesn’t admit to the weakness, he hides it from his child, but existing like this poisoning him)

and what can goro do? the basement is dark, dingy like the endless halls of mementos, but he knows he’s found god long before he actually sees him, feeling sick and repulsed, the sense of wrongness, of trespassing, of walking into see something his entire body rejects to experiencing...it all pales to actually laying eyes on the being they’ve been looking for, however, a poor parody of humanity. its eyes all lock onto him, six of them on its face, an additional four on each hand that it uses to observe him too, its mouths full of sharp teeth, body covered in dizzying geometric patterns that disappear under the vestments of a priest. goro hadn’t known what to expect but the sheer size of it is even overwhelming, just tall enough to fall into an uncanny valley, its skin a true white with shocks of blood that burns an angry red (but it can’t be blood, can it?) and hair that turns to feathers at its tips, something that tried so much to be human but has failed. yet yaldabaoth doesn’t move, he observes goro quietly as he senses the mix of emotion from him, an intent to kill being overridden by something else, at least for now. even as goro draws a weapon, levels it at the deity that refuses to move, he can’t pull the trigger on it, knowing he would lose akira too...but how can he sacrifice his autonomy and everyone else’s to a monster? he tries to speak to it but it doesn’t answer, although he can see that the mouths on either side of its face twitch into different expressions occasionally...and he can’t stand that indifference, that silence, the creature that created them and abandoned them without care...the creature that surely had made him suffer so without a second thought. his mind makes up, motivation and rage clicking into place and only then does yaldabaoth move, a split second before goro’s reflexes can fire on him and it only serves to piss him off more - this thing knows how he feels, it’s reading him and only stayed still until now because it sensed his indecision, his hesitation....his hesitation for his son’s sake. its eyes narrow by fractions and those toothy mouths smile while it seems the other frowns deeper, obviously now understanding the source of goro’s conflicted emotion the moment he thinks of akira. the god finally opens its mouth but just as quickly it seems to think better of it, an action that rattles goro before he hears the basement door slam open again and almost in an instant, in a moment too impossibly fast, his gun is now pointed at akira. his eyes are nothing like they had been before, that composure, the cool sharpness of them replaced by pain, by hatred, by the red sting of tears in betrayal, of righteous anger and animal-like fear for an entire existence threatened, the panic of survival and the hurt of that panic coming from someone you had trusted so much more than any other. goro can’t stand it, he knows what akira thinks now without a single word traded between them...a godhunter that had used him to track his prey, the deity that now grabs akira with all four hands to remove him from the line of fire and the first words goro hears him speak tell his child to run, to find somewhere far from this city, but akira refuses. this is all his fault. he led a hunter here to his father, a father that’s only here as he is now because he won’t leave akira on his own, but when he and goro look at each other once more, akira pushed back and partially hidden, goro’s gun lowering inch by inch, what can they do? one of them should die here, yet in that instant they reach an impossible impasse, neither of them willing to sacrifice the other despite being so opposed to one another. the god is silent, watching goro closely in his unpredictable indecision once more...but goro can’t raise his gun against akira and this monster...the thing all of humanity wants dead now shielding the boy he loves, so where does that leave the hunter? he has to leave, has to run from them and escape that horrifying, suffocating basement, escape his own hesitation and the revelation that he has fallen in love with something that isn’t even human, the spawn of that repulsive god. he can’t sacrifice his own need for revenge, the need to free humanity from an oppressive will, but he can’t sacrifice akira either...and things only get more complicated from there.

[muzzleroars]

In reference to the one where Akira just snaps and goes against yaldi made me wonder if he wouldn’t develop a split personality one is akira yaldiboath creation and slave the other joker with his heart and senses returned to him and who becomes the embodiment of rebellion and have the two sides constantly bicker and argue with each other over even small things like what to eat and what movie to see to more serious things like killing there creator/warden and who’s the real Akira

oooh an interesting concept....especially since i have considered how bad end akira and canon akira would interact with each other. BUT this is the like the extreme end of canon akira, all of his anger and rebellion condensed into joker while all the broken and traumatized parts of himself are retained in akira...and BOY would they hate each other. i see this joker as like. the infallible leader of the phantom thieves, the one that never lets himself break and takes on all the burden of responsibility without complaint, while akira has been left so decimated by all the trauma he incurred over the course of the year (which accelerated drastically in the last couple months) that he was a shell of himself even before yaldabaoth stole his heart from him. bad end akira still has the same tireless work ethic, the same drive to be of use and to work toward reform, but his priorities have shifted so much - reform means helping people accept yaldabaoth and he can’t be alone, he can’t be the one to make all of his decisions anymore. i find akira interesting in the sense that i think of him as someone that needs control and autonomy in his life, like he HAS to make all of his own decisions and he is one of those people that won’t ever do something someone else tells him to do if he can help it...but at the same time, he burns himself out on it because he takes on loads of responsibility for others. and those others come to expect it of him, so they keep leaning on him and he keeps allowing it, needing to have control in his life, needing to help, needing to be needed. and subconsciously, that’s exhausting...he can’t keep it up, it’s destroying him little by little to be sixteen and taking on responsibility for other kids and even adults - their very happiness and even their LIVES depending on his next piece of advice or move. he’s taxed to his wit’s end by the time the bad end rolls around, and i think that’s one of the saddest parts - that akira leans on yaldabaoth, asks him to take responsibility, to parent him and make those decisions for him because it’s always, always been on him this entire year that he’s already incredibly vulnerable in. the thing is, the public in p5 want to be cared for, to have the burden of responsibility lifted from them, and that’s the point akira has reached BECAUSE of all the people around him that counted on him to an unhealthy extent (side bar: i in NO WAY blame the thieves and i don’t believe at all that they never appreciated what akira did and they truly, deeply loved him...but they’re traumatized kids too, and akira offered what seemed like such a strong shoulder to cry on that they couldn’t resist doing so even to akira’s detriment. but he hid that from them, and they had no IDEA he was doing this for literally every single person he met...the adults on the other hand?? they should feel bad for putting all this on an already traumatized sixteen year old lmfao). akira has to tap out, he’s not like yaldabaoth who is a being MEANT to take responsibility for everyone...and really, at that point, akira feels he’s the only one that could take responsibility for him because of that. this is the whole purpose of his creation, so akira can allow it and can let himself let go, but that destroys him because it’s a core part of who he is.

SO THAT WAS A BIG TANGENT, but it’s all to say that akira would fight back against joker because he CAN’T be that person again - he wants someone to care for him after all his hard work while joker is repulsed by the very idea of anyone else directing his actions. yaldabaoth needs to be destroyed, but akira doesn’t want his one parental figure ripped away from him and be back to making so many hard, even life or death decisions. it goes deeper than just truly believing in yaldabaoth’s words now and believing him to be a god - it’s about akira’s own survival and having someone that will finally take care of him (no matter how poorly it may be). but being able to do those decisions and live freely, even if it’s hard, is what joker fights for, what he believes is right and an essential part of himself no matter how difficult it may be. it’s who is and one of the reasons why bad end akira is so unwell - he needs that part of himself but he gave it up because he was so broken. so it’s really two parts that are totally at odds with each other fighting for what they need the most - akira needs to be cared for, joker need to be free, and he needs to let others be free too. joker can’t bear being hurt, being taken from and controlled, but akira feels a need to accept it in order to do what he needs to survive....VERY inch resting 🤔