#i love this idiot so much omg hahahaha

[bbyjackie]

𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐒 𝐒𝐀𝐁𝐎'𝐒 𝐆𝐅 — ♡

one piece social media + dating feat: sabo

》 asl brothers completed

♡ liked by lalalakoala, nicorobin and 5.3k others

_ynln: ur gf or ramen, pick one

tagged: saaaa_bo

saaaa_bo: the answer is obvious

↳ saaaa_bo: ramen 🙏

↳ ace: wrong.

↳ ace: the correct answer is me 🤩🤩

↳ marco_o: said absolutely no one

↳ _ynln: @saaaa_bo surely this is grounds for a break up 🫤

lalalakoala: okay we get it, you have a boyfriend

p1rateking_luffy: YOU GUYS GOT RAMEN WITHOUT ME?????!!!!??! ☹️☹️

↳ _ynln: sorry luf, i'll bring you next time!

↳ saaaa_bo: no wtf we are not bringing luffy, i'm gonna go broke and he's gonna eat our share

↳ ace: im gonna have to agree with sabo

↳ p1rateking_luffy: 🙁

↳ lovenami: nah sabo you're so real for that (liked by saaaa_bo)

↳ marco_o: @ace you are literally the LAST person who can say that

♡ liked by blackleg.sanji, nefertari_vivi and 6.9k others

_ynln: applications for a new bf linked in my bio.

[music: traitor - Olivia Rodrigo ♫]

tagged: saaaa_bo

blackleg.sanji: I APPLIED ‼️‼️‼️

blackleg.sanji: HOW MANY CAN I SEND IN?!

blackleg.sanji: WILL I BE NOTIFIED IF I MAKE IT IN THE WAITLIST?

↳ theroronoa.zoro: the only notification you're gonna get is one from the police

saaaa_bo: WOWW JUST CAUSE I CHOSE RAMEN OVER YOU 🤨🤨

↳ _ynln: girls gotta do what she's gotta do

↳ _ynln: OMG SABO YOU APPLIED? I LOVE YOU SO MUCH OMG STOP 💗💗

↳ saaaa_bo: wtv loser.

lovenami: omg you should've made them transfer you five dollars to apply

↳ _ynln: nami ur trying to pimp me out huh 😭🫵

lovenami: you're so gorg yn. (liked by saaaa_bo)

↳ _ynln: i miss u sm namiiii 💕

nefertari_vivi: OMG STOP UR SO PRETTY I LOVE UUU

↳ _ynln: 😭💕

ace: why is everyone happy EXCEPT ME (liked by saaaa_bo)

↳ marco_o: give me five minutes and i'll dm u a list of reasons (liked by _ynln, saaa_bo, p1rateking_luffy)

♡ liked by ace, lalalakoala and 11 others

priv.ynn: blocking him on this acc so he doesn't see this but omg this is so cute, koala caught him trying to buy gifts for me <333

ace: yo wtf why isn't he getting me prada 🤨

ace: ALSO WHAT DID HE BUY DAMN THAT BAG IS HUGE

↳ priv.ynn: IDK I RLLY WANT TO KNOW

lalalakoala: you guys are so cute together it makes me want to die 🥱

lovenami: DAMNN GIRLY UR SO LUCKY (liked by priv.ynn)

♡ liked by p1rateking_luffy, _ynln and 8.2k others

saaa_bo: public service announcement: my gf is the best. i love her sm. she is so beautiful, i am so lucky to be hers <3

tagged: _ynln

p1rateking_luffy: HEHE my future sister in law is so pretty (liked by ace, p1rateking_luffy)

↳ _ynln: AWWW LUFFY YOU'RE SO SWEET LOVE U 💕💕

_ynln: SABO STOP

_ynln: YOURE MAKING ME FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU ALL OVER AGAIN YOU IDIOT 🤓💖

↳ saaaa_bo: does this mean i won the boyfriend application?

↳ _ynln: there was no competition 💪

nicorobin: pretty girl

↳ saaaa_bo: i agree ☝️

↳ _ynln: YOU GUYS STOP IT IUBWVCEI

lalalakoala: think u feel lonely? spend the night third wheeling these guys and see how u feel then 💀💀

↳ _ynln: KOALA WE TRIED SETTING YOU UP W SO MANY PEOPLE YOU'RE JUST PICKY

↳ lalalakoala: 🥱🥱

♡ liked by saaaa_bo, ace and 8.5k others

_ynln: top scoring appplicant 1️⃣

tagged: saaaa_bo

saaaa_bo: pretty woman

saaaa_bo: hell yeah 💪🔥🔥

ace: yn check ur dms i sent u uggo photos of sabo as a kid

↳ _ynln: LMFAOOO???

↳ saaaa_bo: ACE YOU'RE LITERALLY PRAYING ON MY DOWNFALL

↳ saaaa_bo: ALSO I WAS NEVER AN UGLY KID

↳ ace: sorry couldn't hear that over that tooth gap of urs 🥱

↳ p1rateking_luffy: HAHAHAHA YOU'RE SO FUNNY ACE

↳ saaaa_bo: 😐

↳ _ynln: HAHAHA NOOOO SABO WAS SO CUTE ‼️

↳ ace: everyone she's being held at gunpoint (liked by _ynln)

↳ saaaa_bo: 😐😐

blackleg.sanji: NOOOOOO

blackleg.sanji: gotta respect sabo for treating you well gorgeous queen (liked by saaaa_bo)

lalalakoala: omg im literally gonna have to block u

[yakumtsaki]

Spice and Cyan are the last cousin-fuckers left standing and are proving impossible to break up. I'm inclined to blame the fact Sugar and June also had the hots for each other and passed these destructive genes on to these losers but whatever it is they're just annoyingly into each other.

Now I'm not gonna lie, I did almost waver cause I was like 'man you know what they're second cousins so at the end of the day truly who cares, maybe I should just let them stay together and create one Union super-bebe'.. and then I see this:

In case you can't tell from this amazing screenshot they have ONE BOLT. ONE. ALL THIS DRAMA OVER ONE BOLT ARE YOU KIDDING ME

-What is drama compared to someone you almost desire? -Oh baby, the mediocrity of my passion for you is too much to bear!

-This lukewarm hot tub water is the perfect metaphor for our love.. -Exactly, it's the water of the womb and we all know that's where that sole bolt is even coming from!

UGH. Also man the difference between your noses is UNREAL, now I'm more worried about that if you procreate than the incest.

-Hahahaha, as expected I'm the only one of this trash family that's in a non-disgusting relationship!

Felina no offense but you could afford to add some drama cause you've become boring af.

-People are sick of all this perverted nonsense! They want someone dignified and happily monogamous!

Ya idk sis, I mean look at Barth dislocating his entire spine as we speak:

-I SENSE BETRAYAL AGAIN. WHO DARES CHEAT ON ME NOW

-JIMMY, BACK IN THE ARMS OF MY COUSIN THAT I RIGHTFULLY STOLE YOU FROM. AND TO THINK I WAS GONNA MARRY YOU WHEN I WON THE HEIRSHIP

-You were??

-OF COURSE NOT

Bro I can't, the entire house hates Barth other than Meadow and her billion nice points and Spice who is his childhood bestie. Note that he and Sunset have that goddamn amour fou and are independently becoming un-enemies, which I'm NOT GONNA LET HAPPEN.

-Ok Barth, let's get drunk and make some reckless and sexy decisions!

SUNSET GODDAMMIT IT

-Why do you keep cockblocking us? You know our kids would be hot!

I DONT CARE

-Ya right! Don't act like you haven't thought about it!

IM NOT LISTENING TO THIS

-You know we would produce a hot, psycho turbo-Union! A little Jojo or Jojette, untainted by non-Union DNA, one freakshow to rule them all!! Look into your heart, you know it to be true!!!

ENOUGH, STOP TRYING TO SEDUCE ME WITH THE PROMISE OF COMICALLY INSANE OFFSPRING, SUNSET. EVERYONE FUCK OFF TO BED RIGHT NOW, GOODNIGHT

-AND GOOD MORNING, LOSERS

WTF. Why are you here we've paid our bills!

-BUT YOU HAVEN'T PAID THE INCEST TAX

-OMG THERE'S A FIRE🌞

-OMG THE REPOMAN IS HERE TO TAKE OUR SHIT

-OMG THE STREAKER KILLED OUR FISH

What??

-I JUST DON'T WANNA ADMIT IM STILL CRYING OVER BARTHOLOMEW

NOOOO NOT OUR BEAR STATUE WE'VE HAD IT SINCE GENERATION 1! PLEASE JUST TAKE ONE OF THE KIDS INSTEAD

-YOU SHOULD HAVE PAID YOUR BILLS

WE FUCKING DID

-PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS WITH YOU FLOPS

FUCK YOU, REPOMAN, WE'RE NOT FLOPS

-WAAAAAAAAH I CAN'T BELIEVE HE TOOK OUR BEAR

Oh great, now half these flops are in aspiration failure, that's just what the doctor ordered.

-OMG AND NOW THE OTHER PLANT IS ON FIRE

BRO WTF IS HAPPENING WE'RE CURSED

-WE ARE AND WE ALL KNOW WHO'S TO BLAME

-HE'S BEEN BAD LUCK SINCE HE WAS BORN

-Can you harpies take this somewhere else, I'm trying to get high here!

-KILL HIM

OK NO. No one's killing anyone, we're NOT cursed, ok?

-We're broke, afflicted with a bills glitch, fires keep starting and half the house is in aspiration failure!

Well let's be real, the broke part is on you.

-US??

You idiots are averaging a D each semester because you're too busy fucking each other, beating each other up or both..

..I mean freaking Jimmy is on academic probation, I have never gotten this before in all the years I've played this game, this is the worst college run of all time.

-WHAT IS YOUR POINT

My point is the bar is in hell so let's just get out of this run alive, ok? Now you kids make nice!

-Well, Failina, now that I'm looking at you up close I guess putting lipstick on a pig does work sometimes.

-For my next move, I'll shove my queen in your other eyehole.

See, now isn't this nice? And I think I figured out what caused the bills thing so everything should be fine now..

-THINK AGAIN BITCH

OH FFS

-I'M HERE TO FREE THIS NEIGHBORHOOD FROM YOUR TERRIBLE SPOKEN WORD POETRY

Ok you know what I'm actually fine with that one, take it- Um do I hear hearts??

UH WHAT????

-THAT'S RIGHT IM IN LOVE WITH KEA FOR NO CLEAR REASON

WTF

-We've been friends for a long time-

You have?? Man I really need to pay more attention around here.

-Yes well you can't help being useless!

Very true! Well please, continue, let me just call someone over-

-YOU LEFT THE HOT TUB OF LUKEWARM LOVE TO CHEAT ON ME???

Man I know, it's so terrible! Anyway-

-HOW DARE YOU BE UPSET WITH ME FOR CHEATING ON YOU

CYAN WTF LOL

-YASSSS BEAT HIS ASS UP BABE HE DESERVES IT

DOES HE?? Cyan you are one crazy bitch, I love it.

-I take after my mom! :D

Which one, they're both insane! :D

-What's it take to get your number? What's it take to bring you home? Hurry up, it's time for supper, order up, I'm hot to go🎵

Alright well Chapell karaoke seals it, Kea, welcome to the family!

-You mean it this time right, you won't fuck me over again like when I was engaged to Sophito?

LOL I forgot about that but no I'm certain this one is gonna work out, unless crazy ass Cyan goes back to one of her cousins

-What?

I said start planning the wedding!

[lutawolf]

My Personal Weatherman and the D/s element Ep 3

If you haven't read my other episode break-downs, please do so here.

Let me just say, I love Segasaki. Oh, so much. He works hard to read Yoh. There is a lot of respect there, it's just there is also a lot of miscommunication. He commands Yoh, put that aside and come eat breakfast with me. And Yoh immediately obeys. While saying, he hates Segasaki in the most sappy inner voice ever. Leading us to believe that I hate you, is code for, I love you.

I really like you, is big dialogue? I mean, even porn should have some kind of plot asshole. I wanna beat his boss. Oh, Yoh is eating out. Change of scenery. Then surprise, Segasaki shows up. I adore it. He knows Yoh enough to know that he would be doing café sketches, so he came by. Um, good thing Segasaki missed seeing him with the girl. hahahaha. Are all Doms jealous? I get this question a lot. The answer is no. However, all Doms are possessive. That's not to say they can't also be jealous, but I personally am known for my possessiveness with damn near zero jealousy.

Their friendship is cute though. She got some brains there. She does. Why isn't he drawing BL! Um, he likes to draw breasts. Okay, I respect that.

The indecisiveness of a submissive. It's a thing. The more submissive, the less they like to make decisions. I however, want to make all the decisions unless I'm hungry, then I short circuit and sound like any hangry female. Segasaki asks if Yoh is working, Yoh says it doesn't matter. So Segasaki says they are going out, and he still asks again if Yoh has plans. Very respectful. Segasaki has way too much respect for any of Yoh's boundaries for anyone but dumbass Yoh to think he is a slave. That little smile Segasaki gives! Ahhhh!

They're on a date! So cute! I love how Segasaki just stares at Yoh and waits for him to notice. You are looking at a Dom with a strong primal instinct. The hunt, the chase, and outwitting his prey.

So much went down at this scene. Okay, so first, notice that Segasaki orders for Yoh. When I talk about a Dom serves food, this is what I mean. Everyone wants me to explain the difference between a Dom and sub serving food, and it's hard to. I can't just say, well one is a Dom and one is a sub, but that is it. The attitude involved with food is different. Segasaki and Yoh are a great example of this. Can you see the difference in how they both serve the food? How one is an act of service while the other is providing? Even in the way Segasaki takes a bite from Yoh's bun, he asks, but he is already going in for a bite and Yoh is already offering. The asking is simply Segasaki being soft with his commands. There is a reason why Brat Tamers are often called charming. Now, also notice that Segasaki purposely brought up the price, he also made sure to say that Yoh doesn't need to worry about it. This is him saying, no matter what, I can provide for you. Which is very important. A sub does not want a Dom that can't provide security. Think about it, a submissive is giving all of themselves, of course they need to feel secure.

Look at the difference in how Yoh asks for a bite. Look how he double-checks that it's okay. Totally different vibe. They felt like only Gyaru could have it? Like only females?

Oh, the ride is giving me My Accidental Love vibe. Yoh honey, this is a date. So cute!

Segasaki pushed that sales lady right out of the way. He wasn't rude, but he clearly indicated that Yoh was his. Poor Yoh is clueless. Man is cute but dumb. Seriously dumb. Thankfully, Segasaki is all about this idiot. He really does get him. OMG, the sheets!!! This is going down as my favorite. HAHAHA

Segasaki teases until Yoh admits. He teases, and then he praises. Ah, now Segasaki is calling him out. He continues to push. Causing Yoh to retreat, but Segasaki won't let him. He then calls Yoh an idiot. Fair enough because he is.

The kisses though! The kisses!!

See, Segasaki knows Yoh. Aw, the way Yoh curls in on him. So cute!

These two are killing me. I need more. Now! I'm looking forward to the next one. Hopefully you guys are too. If you enjoyed this. Let me know. 💜💜💜

[queen-of-reptiles]

𝙷𝙰𝙼𝙼𝙴𝚁 𝚃𝙸𝙼𝙴

description: In which dagný's girlfriend surprises her with a sudden move and wonders how she didn't pick up on all the hints previously

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dagný brynjarsdóttir x female reader

disclaimer: this is all fiction! Do not take any of this seriously, i am in no way saying Dagny is bi-sexual!

warnings: language, bad google translation, cuteness and so much fluff - so much

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y/n just posted

liked by, dagnybrynjars, alexandraj18, and 198, 390 others

y/n blár hefur alltaf verið minn litur, hver vissi að tárin væri það líka?

blue has always been my colour, who knew claret was too?

view 6283 comments

username1: JESUSSSSSSS 😍😍😍😍😍

username2: HOW????? 🔥🔥

username3: I feel like she is too hot to be a footballer?!?!?!!! 😱

username4: UGGHHHHHH 🔥🔥🔥

dagnybrynjars: Ég er heppin kona 😍😍

i'm a lucky woman

^

y/n: Ég er heppnari elskan 😘

I am luckier baby

clarewheeler: OMG!

^

y/n: hehe my new fav dress!

^

karen_holmgaard: I don't blame you! Beautiful!

^

y/n: xoxo

alexandraj18: móðir! 🔥🥺

mother!

^

y/n: barnið mitt! 😊

child of mine!

^

dagnybrynjars: okkar!

of ours

^

y/n: okkar, afsakið elskan 😚😚

of ours, apologies baby

^

username5: omg this is so cute! ☺️

^

username6: what did they say???

^

username5: Alex called y/n mother and y/n called her 'child of mine' and dagny corrected her saying 'of ours' and y/n responded with 'of ours of sorry baby!'

^

username6: omg they are the cutest!!!!

^

username7: AWWWWWWWW 🥹🥹🥹

see more comments...

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y/n just posted on their story

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dagnybrynjars just posted on her story

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y/n just posted on their close friends story

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y/n just posted

liked by, mackenziearnold, dagnybrynjars and 203, 822 others

y/n hammer time!

(Vil taka það fram að ég á mjög erfitt með að vera DIY kærasta.)

(Would like to point out I am very much struggling being a DIY girlfriend.)

view 6088 comments

username1: I love her so much 🥺🥺

username2: I am loving all of her west ham puns atm!! 😂

^

username3: RIGHT?! but they are making me wonder...

^

username4: omg do you think?? 😶😶

username5: HAHAHAHA

dagnybrynjars: þú gerðir frábært starf elskan! ❤️

you did a wonderful job baby!

^

y/n: Ég grét þrisvar og fékk mér tveggja tíma lúr - bölvaðu aukaæfingunni þinni! Elska þig tho! ❤️

I cried three times and had a two hour nap - curse your extra training session! love you tho!

mackenziearnold: DIY SOS - proud of you!

^

y/n: awwww thanks Mac! ☺️

hawacissoko23: Go on y/n!! Stick it to the mrs! 👏

^

y/n: no ring no Mrs ! 🤷‍♀️

^

kirstysmith.11: @dagnybrynjars

^

dagnybrynjars: not mrs yet... 😏

^

username6: 😱😱😱

^

username7: omg omg OMGOMG

see more comments...

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Dagny waited for their new arrivals with the rest of the girls, some of them were passing a ball between them while Dagny watched her phone, confused her girlfriend hadn't texted her.

A vibration makes the skipper look down and Dagny sighs when she sees it is just a new post from West Ham women, welcoming their new signing.

Flicking her phone open, Dagny lets out a call of shock at her girlfriend's face staring back at her, Mackenzie laughs, having known about the transfer and spins her skipper to face her girlfriend.

y/n was lent against the tunnel entrance, the new signings of Riko already talking to others with her translator. y/n looked fantastic in the hammer's shirt and Dagny could feel the breath leave her.

How hadn't she known, how hadn't she'd guessed? All the hints obvious now, her Hammer puns, her change in colour for her wardrobe.

"Ertu búin að ná þér, ástin mín?" y/n asked her girlfriend with a chuckle.

caught up have you, my love?

"Ég er þvílíkur hálfviti." Dagny gasps.

I am such an idiot

"Hálfvitinn minn." y/n hums making Dagny smile softly.

my idiot

The skipper sighs at her girlfriend and moves forward the two meeting in a soft kiss, still aware they were in public. The sound of gagging echoes.

The two pull away and turn to the team who are all mock gagging and y/n rolls her eyes before Mackenzie grins widely and runs at her happily.

"Macca!" y/n laughs as the woman scoops her up tightly and spins.

"Skipper's mrs!" Mackenzie yells and there is an echo of laughter.

"No ring no mrs!" y/n yells back as she is finally placed back on her feet the rest of the team coming to greet her.

Dagny only smiles softly at her lover before the group are called away ready for training.

"You're here." Dagny hums as she takes her girlfriend's hand softly.

"I'm here." y/n reassures as they join the group.

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y/n just posted

liked by hawacissoko23, mackenziearnold and 218, 276 others

tagged dagnybrynjars

y/n think she finally caught on...

view 12, 281 comments

username1: COME ON YOU IRONS ⚒️⚒️⚒️

username2: so excited to have her omggggg!!!

username3: allll the puns make sense now! 😂

^

username4: how did we not see the hints???? 🤨

dagnybrynjars: Took me a while, but I'm there!

^

y/n: xoxo

mackenziearnold: I KNEW ABOUT IT HA 😁😁

^

kirstysmith.11: So did I kenzie, you're not special

^

mackenziearnold: :(

username5: AGHHHHHHHH ❤️❤️❤️

username6: she does look good in claret tbf

^

username7: HOT! 😛

see more comments...

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dagnybrynjars just posted

liked by y/n, alexandraj18 and 289, 182 others

tagged y/n

dagnybrynjars she does look good in claret

view 10, 222 comments

username1: 🥹🥹🥹🥹

username2: Yes she does...

mackenziearnold: you two are so cute it makes me feel sick!

^

kirstysmith.11: icky

^

y/n: you want me to hand out receipts ??? 🤨

^

mackenziearnold: omg you guys are so cute! 😅

^

kirtsysmith.11: I agree so cuteeee! 😊

^

y/n: that's what I thought 😏

^

username3: hahahahahahahahah 😂😂

westhamwomen: Happy to have you y/n!!

^

y/n: ❤️

^

dagnybrynjars: happy to have her too honestly!

username4: I love her so much omg!! 🥺

username5: I miss her already (everton fan here!) 😭

^

username6: I know she was so lovely and so good! We are going to go down without her! 😭

^

username7: she's a snake for leaving Everton honestly 🖕🖕

^

username8: why???? because she wanted to be with her girlfriend of 8 years? because she was offered a massive contract with West Ham for great money and better exposure?? She gave six years to Everton, she is allowed to move! 🙄

^

username9: 👏👏👏

username10: loving the fact this is black and white lmao 🤣

see more comments...

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END

love this woman

AND LOVE THIS FCKING TEAM xoxox

-

Queenie xx

[thecapricunt1616]

The Bear S3 Capri Live React

WARNING! Spoilers for each episode below the cut!

EP 1 - “Tomorrow”

ASSHFBEJNSNDNEJWNENE AND WHEN IM BACK IN CHICAGO I FEEL ITTT!!!!!! WOOOOOO

CARMY HRJEJWJW YOU'RE OUT OF FREEZER JAIL MY LOVE!!

Oh your poor hand I wanna kiss it, my sweet baby :((

Omg it’s filmed so differenttttt AAAAAA!!!!

Zaddy walked in meaning business lets gOOO

Like I said in TB&HH and many of my one shots this is a STUNNING restaurant - like FUCK!!! Carmy is BRILLIANT !!

Carmen RELAX!! Jesus! With punting the chair!

Omg his notebook from The French Laundry!!! Cute

BRBEBSHSBSNSBSBSBSBSEBVELHCAA LUCAAAAAAA

COPENHAGEN OH MY GO FJEJWBDBD WERE BACK

OHRBE WE ARE SO BACK

New Yorks got everything :( OH this seeaaason is gonna rip my heart to shreeeeeds New York destroyed him.

Oh I think we are getting loads of baby chef Carmy FUCK 

Oh god oh god 'subtract'??? Fuuuuck

I would hate how perfect he always is HAHAHAHA I would haaaate working with him!!!!

Cousin Steve took care of him, I'm glad someone did 🥺

Oh fucking for Carmy to kiss me like that 

The kiss on the nose is everything I want to do in life 

SORRY. THE WORDS OMG GOOD BOY GOOD BOY

OMG SYDCARMY KISS KISSKISSKISSIIISSS

“It’s never gonna happen again” he will die before it happens 

Good apologize to Richie you FUCKING IDIOT and good for saying I’m sorry good for saying I love you. Good boy. Good boy. 

He is about to make everyone miserable.  

“I know you are, honey” that is his real mother figure. 

While Mikey was dying Richie was destroying his marriage trying to save him and Carmy was getting verbally abused in New York. I am…gutted! 

I have thought about Carmy finding out about Mike. I never. Fucking. Thought. They. Would. Show it.

ARE WE SEEING MIKES 

WE ARE OH NY FJEBE WE ARE SEEING MICHAELS FUCKING OH HIS FUNERAL HE SAT. OUTSIDE. OH I AM COOKED THIS SEASON I AM C O O K E D !!!!!

“LET IT RIP BEAR” OH FHEJWBDBDB 

Like a mother Nat snuck the money in his pocket. I’m fuckin CRYYYING BRO THIS SEASON IS GONNA GUT ME 

The best meal Syd has ever had 🥹

The fennel makes him think of Syd because she has an allergy I’m gonna stroke out. 

EP1 ; Final Thoughts - SydCarmy is SO happening if it doesn’t what the fuck are they doing. Baby Carmy is gutting me. I hope Luca doesn’t go away after this episode. Mikey. Oh, Mikey :(((. Natalie? The cinematography - oh I’m about to EAT w these fics. Oh my god.I am fucking GUUTTTEEDDD THIS SEASON IS GOING TO DESTROY ME

EP2 - “Next”

SYD! MY GORL THERE YOU ARE BBY!!!

the AirPod falling out is so real

Lmaoooo her dad !! She is absolutely moving out as soon as she can 

Awww the ‘love you chef’ <3

See this music like shut up SydCarmy or bust!!! lmaooooo

Why is the fourth wall being broken???

His anxiety is so insane he is acting cracked out LMAO

CICERO OH NO - this is gonna be INSANE

Carmy needs to step off Syds dick and give her some control lmfaooo - like ? you don’t even own this place little man.

“Technique is spelt wrong but OK” BYE THIS IDIOTTTTTTTTTTTTTT 

“You know buddy, I tried to call in and get you an order but they says you was back in the fridge yelling at yourself” LMFOAAOAOAO VJKFDNVLAKNLKVN I AM CRYING HE IS I LOVE UNC SO MUCH

everyone is asking him why the fuck he’s doing this and he cant say “because i cant stick my dick in syd” so he doesn’t know what to say.

He’s quitting smoking not for his health but to save … time. Alright then.

“The computer drafted the agreement so make sure you have a lawyer look at it” CAAAACKLING 

DAAAAADDDYYYY RICHIEEEE

Carmen shut the fuck up you are in no position for fuck yous.

“I commend your bravery from inside a locked vault” IM DRFNDJSNENN HAHAHAHA GET HIM RICH

“Oh my god am I finally having a stroke?” “Am I having a stroke?” These POOR WOMEN SOMEONE PUT CARMEN ON A FUCKING LEASH

“I insist that you get fucked my good man” BYEEEEE HAHAHAHAHAHA RICHIE IS TOO FUNNY 

They are bickering like BITCHES 

his ego needs to be stroked lmaoooo he’s asking Syd to stroke his ego 

“I know sweetheart, don’t be scared” NATALIEEEE HAHAHAH It's ok Fak I'M scared of Carmy rn lmao.

holy fucking shit Carmen you are driving me CRRAAAAZYY SHUT UP 

“This is scary” FAK, HONEY I KNOW CARMY IS CRACKED OUT

“Every day Jeffery-Ballet?” TINA HAHAHAHA I LOVE THAT 

This IS banana town sweetheart Fak

“Sup PIMP” PLEEEASE HAHAHA

“He was gonna tell us what he said to Claire”- Richie: “classic behavior dysregulation” PLLLEEASE

“Then I actually take it back, fuck you” i love Richie down

“What’s nunya” “nunya fuckin business” THE WAY IM CRRRY LAUGHINGGGGG LMFAAAAOOOOO THIS IS A GLIMPSE OF HIS CHILDHOOD

The gum chewing is sexy 

“Is that what you did” “no i’m just here if you need anything” oh, Carmy :(

Oh, Marcus :((((((. “Take us there bear” “yes chef” oh my god I’m crying again 

EP2 ; Final Thoughts - Carmen needs to fucking relax and I’m gonna say this probably a lot. Omg the fighting with Richie in this episode was pissing me off they are fighting like catty brothers!!! The moment with Marcus at the end really got to me. This was overall though a hilarious episode

EP3 - “Doors”

Marcus mom funeral!! Awww I’m glad they all are there for him. Thiiis is the moms funeral, ok, so they did it all in one day the shooting for both funerals so we wouldn’t know!!!

I wonder how Carm feels he’s there for Marcus’ mom but wasn’t for his brother 

Wow this speech must be so impactful for Carmy to get a glimpse into someone else’s life like this 

Look alive lizards we are OPENN

Richie is so goooodddd at his job 🥹🫶

For the bear and his honey fans princess cake is 100% going in there hahahah

Hmm things are going a bit too well 

Carmy throwing so much good decent edible food away makes me twitch. 

Carmy and his little edible flowers hahaha I love it

“The rare Transylvanian 5 titted goat?!” CICEROOO HAHAHAH

“Joy” “this is a waste of time, give it to sugar” HAHAHAHA

LMAOOO SINGING HAPPY BDAY IN SPANISH HAHAHA LOVE IT

Fak not putting it ON THE TABLE and Richie being like “keep my mans name out of your mouth “ PLLLELEEEASEE

Something abt Carmy cleaning is so hot

GRAAAHHH THAT PIECE OF BACK SKIN POKING OUT OF HIS SHIRT WHEN HE BENDS OVER

They’re being so too hard on tina :((

Richie is bringing patrons to the kitchen and Carmy is just violently bitching Syd out I am dead also, someone get the belt i’m gonna beat him.

This goes out to everyone who said there’s no chance the bear could fail and that it was a stupid idea it could? (cough- ex moots, cough) ; please tell me why they don’t even have a star and they’re already doing poorly with funds

I can’t- Carmen and Richie are fully going at each others throats and physically fighting.

Please Fak just grilling customers for info.

Carmy is SO little brother and I wanna choke him “we’ll figure it out” “ME?” “I’m trying to use less shiiittt >:(“ like a winey bitch - YOU ARE AN ADULT SHE IS THERE TO HELP YOU YOU LITTLE COCKSUCKER DO YOUR GOD DAMN JOB EFFICIENTLY

Carmy is losing it he needs to be medicated ASAP

Thank GOD Syd is putting her foot down and telling him to shut up

Syd looks fed the fuck up, rightfully

EP3 ; Final Thoughts - Holy shit Carmen is going nuts. Sydcarmy is going so hard rn he needs to finish shit with Claire so he can admit his feelings to himself about Syd. He needs to stop being so mean to her, he is going to cause her to panic. Whats so funny is I drafted Carmy bitching Syd out in my OC fic in the most recent chapter before this even came out (but in my world (in girl world) winnie is behind him chewing his ass out and literally told him he’s acting like his old boss) But it’s funny because hes literally telling her abusive ass shit his boss told him.

EP4 - “Violet”

Ohhhhh to kiss Carmy that way. A dream

The nose kiss oh my god oh my god 

He’s such a good listener 

He is so fucking - oh my god this man. This man. I need him astronomically 

Marcus :(((

I love Syd’s scarf but also lmao the stress of that docu - I get you girl hahah

Yaaaay she’s moving! 

This apartment is stunning!!!

DAD RICHIEEEE AHSHDJSHSHJ EVA OMG CUTIE PATTOOOTIEEE

Him laying with her is so cute. 

“He’s not my uncle like Carmy” 🥹PLS SO CUTE

This is so good such kid convo omgggg kids are just like thissss!! He’s such a good dad omfg playing her handdddd fuckFUCKCJCKCJC expect more Richie content soon

DONNAS GOING TO TIFFS WEDDING OMG!!!!!

Yes daddy TAKE THAT RING OFF YOURE A NEW MAN PAPA 

LMFAOAOAOA THEM SCREAMING HELP

“Maybe you’ve reached as far as your talent can go” makes MY stomach hurt, dawg 

“I feel like Bear is starting to respect me” please the way they look up to him I cantttt lmao

YAY MORE DAD RICHIE 

TAYLOR SWIFT!!!!!!!!!!

This Frank guy is weird- they made a great job at making this feel awkward as fuck.

HE DID INVITE HIM TO THE WEDDING OH GOD

that’s my girl! 

Oh is she about to get poached

Oooo like not Carmy??? Oooooo hes trying to poach her

Marcus has such nicely manicured hands

The way they just stuff snacks in faks mouth to make him go away hahaha love it

Mmhmm this season will make me fall more in love with Richie then ever before

Richie. Richie. Richie. Richie. Richie. Oh my god. My heart is being ripped out 

Wait they’re being reviewed for a star?! Already? They JUST opened! 

EP4 ; Final Thoughts - This was SUCH a Richie episode! I loved it alot :))) <3!!! So many Dad!Richie moments that made me smile. He also almost made me cry with his whole being alone thing. I will remedy my sadness with writing Richie fics literally probably tomorrow because holy holy holy this man I need to give him kissesssssss

EP5 - “Children”

So do the Bears all have the same alarm clocks?

Marcus speech really touched Natalie :((

Carmen doing the boxes by himself HAHAHA its what he deserves!! BAD BOY! 

Syd the ultimate good friend helping Marcus with his moms stuff 

Syd looks so cute her outfit is adorable 

Lmaooo Syd with her dead mom club jokes she’s too funny I see why Carmy is so whipped 

The Bear and His Honey is going to fucking SLAP with this new Carmy content WOW

Him throwing away more food that is perfect literally perfect. *sarcasm*

I wanna leave hickeys on Richie’s neck so bad - it’s so pretty 

Omg Carmys mentor closing the restaurant- he’s spiraling and looking at the every second counts she instilled in him- oh god.. Oh god-

Richie has grown so much im so so proud of him! 

He is crushing on this girl from Ever so hard

IS THAT JOHN CENA?!

JOHN CENA IS A FAK I AM DBHSJABDBEBE HAHAHAHAH

Carmy is gonna get his legs broken if he doesn’t cut it out hahahaha

Fak drinking a Capri-sun LOL

Omgggg him saying to fire Marcus you are CRAZY 

Lmaooo Jimmy venting to syd and saying that carmy has a tree up his ass

Carmy finding baby pics I’m SICK

EP5 ; Final Thoughts - WOWOWOWOW This is the last ep. I am watching tonight I need to digest. This was such a cute Richie ep. I am so in love with Dad!Richie. He is such a good, good dad. I also am dead- John Cena as a Fak? And having a mikey esc. Haircut???? And smoking in the restaurant- and then them saying it smells like smoke I am dead as fuck. Richie really really wants this review to go well, I hope it does:((

EP6 - “Napkins”

Good morning! time for e6 It is Directed by Ayo so i fear it is gonna kill me :) !

Well at least Tina has a normal clock 

Oooo get down on it!!!! Let’s go Tina!!! Get in that groove mama! 

Tina is so Puerto Rican mom I love it so so much 

Tina’s married?! I love it!! how sweet 

If Mikey’s in here- I’m gonna fucking die 

Baker tina!! Oh- customer service Tina? No! Books Tina!!! Smart girl!! that’s my lady :))

NOOOO - WHAT ?! THEY’RE LETTING HER GO?!

THIS IS WHAT LANDED HER AT THE BEEF??? THIS???

Oh Tina I’ve been there mama you’ll land on your feet :((( That’s right baby everything will be ok 

One thing about this show is all of the characters need routine 

The degree thing pisses me off to no end because of how real it is. Like shes been doing this 15 years and knows it better then someone right out of school with a stupid degree.

Awww Tina and hubs been together so long!! So sweet I love it her husband is good to her. 

I sooo love Tina is getting her moment the actress is so kind and amazing 

Woah I thought the big interview would be at the beef LOLLLL like not that it’s big but that they really need her lolll 

Oh my god. They hired someone ??? What the fuck and didnt tell her?!! RUDEEEE 

This little fucking prick oh my god yes Tina fuck him

Aw baby I wanna hug her it’ll be fine mama I know it doesn’t feel like it

Bus is delayed SO SHE COULD APPLY AT THE BEEF HAHAHAHAHA

THERES MY MANNNN RICHIEEE!! HES SO HOT AAAA

“Maam you can’t smoke in here anymore” I can’t hahaha

Everyone calling him handsome I can’t hahah he is! But still hahaha

Omggg richieeee I love him he’s always been so sociallll!! Get ready to eat with the beef Richie oh. Wow. This whole scene is so chef kiss i cant wait to write more the beef!richie

FAKS FAKS FAKS ok where’s Mikey HDBDHAHSHEBDNEBSBD. THERE HE IS IN SHFJENSNSJEJEJENDNEJWKA

MIKEY OH MY GOD JEJSNANQ

RICHIE LMAO STOP THEY ACT HOW IN KNOW THEY WOULDDD

“She can’t be crying in here” I am done LMAO

I fear I’m seeing the Mikey crush AAA “sandwich really that bad??” Stop being funny !! I also see how he got Carmy out of his panic attacks what a brother stop Mikey!! Why would you do that Mikey everyone loved you so muchhh 🥺💔

Gosh Mikey IS so handsome

THE HAUNTED EXPLODING TOILET THAT CARM IS STILL DEALING WITH HAHAHAHA

oh my god Carmy takes after him SO SO SO MUCH oh my god Carmy takes after him so much 

Oh my gosh I didn’t realize she was older then Richie!! 46 means something in this show- did Mikey…at 46? If he did I will fucking sue 

OMG SHOWING HER THE PIC OH ANS TELLING ABOUT CARMY SHUT UP HE “hes the shit” he wasn’t allowed to work at the beef because mikey knew that he’s better then the beef. He sees so much in him I knew that was the case!!! I’m sick 

My god !! Carmy!! Takes!!! After Mikey so fucking MUCH!!! 

Oh Mikey- oh. Mikey. Oh Mikey. Oh Mikey. Oh Michael Berzatto. Hit me while I’m down PAL kick me why don’t you?! “I knew I was gonna get skipped because I had people to take care of” I knew this episode would make me sick. 

oh my god when Tina said she loved Mikey she loved Mikey like a good friend and I am so gutted when Carmy says everyone loved Mikey and he just lit a room up and could make anyone comfortable oh my god I’m so gutted!!!!!!!!!!! 

EP6 ; Final Thoughts - This episode let us truly meet Michael & oh my god it’s almost painful to watch these back to back like- this is a lot to digest holy fuck. When Carmen talked about a temp in a room and how Mikey could feel it then lean into it and manipulate it however he wanted. He did such a good job portraying that. I’d give anything for him to have just called Carmy when he was on that bridge and for him to have answered and for Carmy to change his mind. Oh my god I’m so- like oh my god? This show. I can’t.

EP7 - “Legacy”

Carmy so pretty :)

Oh Richie. Thinking about :((( everything. 

Syd thinking of Carmy 

SHE IS GETTING POACHED BY EVER MAN OH NO

good Carmy is back at AI-ANON 

so much fucking family hahahah god I love Italians hey uncle Gary! 

*sighs* good morning, Syd. 

Oh. Ok he’s opening his own place ok…and he’s asking her I KNEW IT POACHER!! POACHER!!!!!

oh my god he’s offering her a real CDC job - with a real good salary,  it would be healthier for her sadly!!!!!!

How’d I headcanon Carmy knew French PUUUURRIODD 😌

“You look nice” ha. Ha. Ha.  Shoot me in the FUCKING FACE

The gum chewing HNNNNG IM CHEWING ON MY CAGE

“That sounds legendary pal” I WANT TO KISS HIM ON HIS STUPID MOUTH 

ARE THEY PART TIME THE BEEF NOW?!! OH MY GOD- THEY ARE!!! EBRA IS LIVINGGGG HAHAH OMG THIS IS SO COOL???

“Matter of fak supply” LOL

Richie is taking this so seriously which makes me more mad how Carmy treats him like he really is so good at the job and loves it.

Aw he really misses Tiff. :( he’s so different now and wishes he could go back so bad but he’s gonna find someone that I’ll be very jealous of bc I need this man SO BAD

Oh him crying abt Mikey- no stop I can’t 

SYDS TURN IN THE BOXESS HAHAHAH

“Hey grandpa” “hey grandma” I love Ebra and Tina sm lol and her mimicking his accent they’re adorable 

“Maybe you can go fuck, Ted” hahahaha I love telling people to go fuck now 

Eva’s drawing in Richie’s host book 🥹🫶

Carmen I wanna choke you out so bad!  Can you take a single suggestion ???

THE BABY IS COMING :D!!!!

EP7 ; Final Thoughts - Another good episode!! Very balanced which I like, the character centered episodes feel very heavy but I still love them. I'm just happy that we got a little bit of a second to breathe!! I think it’s cool how they’re doing the beef on the side, like so cool! I never thought of that as an option. Because it’s true the neighborhood would probably miss their local sandwich spot! I liked this episode a lot :) Carmy can go fuck this episode, though he’s in the dog house and I hope Syd leaves to teach him a lesson! (& it makes him realize he loves her!!!)

EP8 - “Ice Chips”

I’m guessing before we start Nat is gonna find comfort not in her brother, but in Syd! 

Oh poor Nat all alone :( PETE ANSWER THE PHONE- SYD ANSWER -CARMY ANSWER !!! SOMEONE ANSWERRRRR

CLAIRE SHES FINDING COMFORT IN CLAIRE. NO HER MOM!!! OH MY GOD OH DONNAAAAAA WHAT 

oh my god Donna SUGAR oh my god sugar snapping on Donna I can’t 

COACHING. SHES BEING A MOM HAHAHAH PLEASEE 

someone get someone here other then Donna 

My Scorpio sissy Natalie !!! 11/10/88 (this confirms to me carmy is still in his 20s theres no way hes 33 when nat is 34)

Donna needs to leave this is the worst she’s the worst birth partner ever 

At least Donna is being nice 

She never told her mom she was pregnant??? Wow!

Donna’s labor with Carmy being so incredibly hard is honestly canon! That is so funny actually. Yeah that kid makes everything hard for himself! 

lol you get that epidural queen!!!

I’m glad Donna is hearing that she scared them as children. 

Donna is an alcoholic because her mother had problems

Ok I’m feeling Donna sympathy 

Oh a mothers love. Please STOP THIS I DONT WANN A FEEL BAD FOR DONNA 

EP8 ; Final Thoughts - wow. Wowowowowowowowow 0 Carmy and 0 Richie basically but this was nats episode and Donna’s! I am happy we were able to see the sweet side of Donna, I think (and hope !!) she is on the right path to sobriety!!! This episode was very tender , I loved hearing about their childhoods more <3 Nat is gonna be a good mommy!!!

EP9 - “Apologies”

Magic? Ok sick, ok Marcus!! That’s who was watching this ok then wonder what thats about?

“Claire is peace” please- the thought of her gives you a panic attack. 

He’s gonna apologize this episode Jesus we wasted a whole season still no sydcarmykiss. It’s ok guys stay strong we’ll be there next season 

Yes Syd leave him 

Carmen you are nuts!!! 

Richie and Carmy staring at eachother through the window like bears about to kill eachother is freaking me out.

Syd say it -

Oh wait it’s the funeral for ever lol! I forgot that’s the funeral. Ok not worried 

He goes to the walk in to try to make it in his mind like he hasn’t waited all this time to apologize hahahaha 

AND RIGHT TO SYD AND THE AGREEMENNT I DJSJEBDJSJEHSHWHSBD SYDCARMY TILL I dIEEEE

“Missing one, that wouldn’t the the thing happened to be wedged up your ass the last few weeks is it?” JIMMYYYYY HAHAHAHAHAHA

Jesus this man’s eyes literally glow blue 

He owes him sooo much money wow 

Tina and Marcus are so cute

Carmy and his drawings are adorable 

Ten minutes left and Carmy hasn’t said sorry lol 

His little smile at the farm AAAA

Syd ls bringing them food before Carmy 

No she’s right Carmy I’m sorry why wouldn’t it be immediate insurance what is … wrong with you?

Oh my god fak going to see Claire Fak leave now no no no no no no no no oh my god this is so bad 

Mommy Nat 🥹💖

Aw Carmy looking at mikes funeral card 😭💔

EP9 ; Final Thoughts - Why does this season not feel done?! Well prob because they’re gonna do a season 4. But still there’s no way they can finish all of this in one episode. Holy moly the Faks need to stop interfering this is so bad!!!! Too many Faks!! Ok I can’t last episode time AAA

E10 - “Forever” !!!!!!

This mentor I like very much 

He took the popes nose thing from this mentor hahaha

This man who mentored Carmy it’s understandable why he was so driven or like, inspired to keep going

LUCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LUCAAA LUCA LUCA LUCA LUCA

LUCA LUCA HES SO CUTE HRJJEJSJEJDNDJSNSNS “is that injected? Or is it…oh..ok” CUTE SHY EMBARASSED LUCAAAAAA

OMG CARMY MINGLING GOOD BOY!!!

Richie is crushing on Jess hard 

Luca oh baby I wanna kiss himmm oh him 

SYDYFBDNANA. SYD SYD SYD SYD CARMY IS GONNA EXPLODE 

oh my fid oh my god oh my god oh my god his boss his his oh my god 

Oh my god oh m y god “working for a bad boss is the worst because the culture you’re a part of is the culture you create” Carmen is spiraling rn (the next chapter of my oc fic is gonna go crazy)

Syd being more sociable then Carmy bc Carmy is panicking 

This smug bastard loves that he makes Carmen squirm I wanna punch him

“This is why you’re alone you can’t handle this” I’m going to fucking stab something

Carmy finds 0 joy in cooking anymore. 

Richie is so lovable the boss loves him and knew him for less then a week hahahahah

Carmy OH CARMY CARMY CARMY OH CARMY  “generally being you” my jaw is my jaw my jaw my jaw my jaw my jaw on THE FLOOOOORRRRRRRRRR. Oh my god. He’s such this asshole boss I hope he dies holy fuck HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE. I WANT TO PEEL OFF HIS SKIN

Luca and Syd??? Ok- I say go for it queen

My mind is blown so far this is so amazing but also how the fuck hasn’t he sorted with Claire and S3 is closing???

Omg after party at SYDS?! Where is Carmy??? literally Marcus and Tina are there and the Faks?? He has to be seeing Claire there’s no way why would he miss out on this!!!!

If only Carmy got to be apart of something fun. Of course he’d deprive himself. OF COURSE

He is… giving Syd ptsd like his boss did to him. She is having done to her what was done to him.

Oh Syd. Oh Syd. Oh you need to get out of there baby it’s killing you. I hate seeing her upset its hurting me.

Their review was bad…. :((((((((((((

YES I KNEW ITTTTTT!! TO BE CONTINUED !!!!! ASDFGHJKLASDFGHJKL

EP10/S3 ; Overall Final Thoughts -

IM CRYING omggggg omg omg omg omg omg omg the whole thing with the boss had me in actual tears. TB&HH is about to eat so hard so so hard oh I have so many ideas AAAA and I’m so in love w Richie even more then last season he is totally crushing on Jess. Oh my god syd needs to get out of the bear Carmy is actually killing her. He is doing to her what his boss did to him and that’s evil!!! Evil evil. Oh my god so many thoughts I have but wow just wow. I can’t most of all wait to read the rest of the fandoms thoughts WOW my fics are about to eat I’m so inspired ALSO SydCarmy fics are about to be so angsty and eeeeeaaaatttttt!! He is slowly killing his girl, also - him being able to say sorry to syd but not claire??? I’m mad that the Faks had so much screentime like they were funny sometimes sure, but waywaaay too much faks. Not enough Nat, not enough MARCUS!! The most powerful touching scene or at least most inspiring of the season for me was the one with carmy & his old boss the sack of shit, that scene is gonna propel tb&hh so farrrr also this whole season is going to! Im so excited to keep writing that. I see people are not liking this season in my peeks on my home page (i didnt want to taint my thoughts) but im kinda surprised - like yes we didn’t wrap everything up & there were too many faks and not enough syd BUT the cinematography was stunning, and we got to see in carmys head which is what i predicted - this season was to get in his head to see 2 main things 1) how he does what he does 2) why he is how he is - and we got both of those answers, I think everyone was expecting this to be the last season and it was never going to be! In order to wrap this up we had to fully understand why carmen is how he is, are you all catching my drift here? I cant wait for S4!!! I feel it that SydCarmy will happen, I know that chefkids will put it in to words because their brain is much bigger then mine - but wow wow and wow. I’m gonna have to watch each episode 10 more times to digest it but wow. Loved it! MOST OF ALL I CANT WAIT FOR S4!!!!!! AAAAA

[louisisalarrie]

https://www.tumblr.com/awesomefringey/753370197897969664/httpsxcomshalarryystatus1801861513407246519

OMG…I mean WTF is this?! I don’t believe it for a second. Such a private guy would no way be pulling 10 women up to his room so publicly. I mean he was only in Mexico 5 minutes…when did he possible have the time to f*ck all their women?!!

No wonder Lou likes to disappear when he’s not touring. He’s clearly had enough of trolls like this…

I am interested to know though about the comment about him getting into trouble for smoking pot in a hotel room (have we heard anything about this elsewhere?) and what video they claim to have passed on to the media. Have you heard anything about this? What horrible people they seem!

So I saw this last night, and I feel like they meant to post it to wattpad instead??? how silly of them!!

but also… I have so many questions for these losers

1. So it was her, and her friend, but how do they know about 10 other people? Did he put them all in a group chat, say “thnks fr th mmrs” and leave?

2. If you’re seen and he wants you, security will ask you if you wanna go to Louis’ room and “hang out”… ok so are we like 15 yr olds using that language?

3. Where tf is he seeing you anyway? Are you front row and louis points you out mid show and stops singing, tells security IMMEDIATELY, and then after the show finishes they find you and make you wait an hour to go to the hotel?

4. If you’re outside the hotel… again, where tf is he seeing you? From the top floor while smoking a cigarette he’s like “oh yeah bro I want that one” and points at you even though he can barely see you

5. How is he amazing in bed if he’s selfish and doesn’t get you off too? Like… that doesn’t sound enjoyable to me whatsoever, bit confused about that one tbh, which leads me to believe these folks may be too young to have even ever had an orgasm/sex. How does that make you touch the sky? Maybe touch some grass instead besties

6. I have no idea what the weed report incident thing is, and so that part is confusing too

7. Everyone who smokes loves a cigarette after sex, it’s an excellent feeling hahahaha so that’s not unbelievable

8. Then he just… fell asleep. And you and your bestie took videos of louis naked in bed… and his security was nowhere to be found? To check your phone when you leave his hotel room? To make sure you didn’t steal anything? To escort you out? okay that makes sense yeah sweet his security sound really professional

9. So they’ve claimed they’ve sold the video to a media outlet. What do you think is gonna happen when it doesn’t get released? “Oh louis’ team must have paid them off but we still have the video but we’ll never show it” yeah ok sure

10. May I kindly remind everyone, once again, about Raven-Symoné’s chat re NDAs and sexy time. There are occasional, slip ups, sure, but he’s not this fucking stupid I don’t care how stoned or drunk he is

anyway, obviously they’re lost, and they’ve missed out so much detail in their little fanfic that it doesn’t even make sense in the slightest. He was seen going straight to the airport after shows, im positive he isn’t having afternoon delights due to how busy and tight his schedule is (I’ve seen it) and that he isn’t an idiotic teenage boy. it’s just so damn laughable. And I think we should all probably just remember the receipts we’ve gotten (like the Chilean UA acct one about Harry in louis’ hotel) and the difference between that, and this. because it’s strikingly obvious

oh and also he is in a long term relationship with a man. so. that kind of discredits this all anyway.

[something-awful1]

my thoughts while rewatching all of Helluva Boss in honor of the S2 trailer PT 3

TRUTH SEEKERS - i sMelL.... c o l o r s 😮 - unrelated but i love the background music? like helluva has such a good soundtrack why didn't we get that for hazbin - i just like complaining - MOXXIE IS T H E BITCH - he's so me - i love this episode so much - blitz looks so chill this is so silly - I'm a VirGo- - I LOVE MOXXIE - i love the fight choreo in this episode so much - blitz is just :p - im sorry what is bitch juice - IT WAS ABOUT UGLY HORNY CATS HAHAHAHA - cue the coolest sequence in indie animation ever - IT TIS NO PRANK BITCH - BECAUSE YOUUU - MY PRECIOUS LITTLE BITCH BOY - ARE TRIPPING BAAAWWWWWLLLLLSSSS - brandon has the best line delivery istg - woah wait scribble moxxies dialogue is some of the best written dialogue in all of vivzie's projects - this animation is so cool i'm sobbing - this is one of my favorite episodes, i remember watching it when it came out and like actually sobbing - the dhorks are idiots why did they give them the truth serum but like not ask them any questions while they were under the influence of it? like- what was the point - THIS IS THE COOLEST FUCKING FIGHT SCENE EVER - no thoughts, head empty, just truth seekers fight choreo - see this is what happens when animators actually take time to make their projects look good, instead of trying to get everything out as quick as possible - millie is the coolest, go break that guy's neck with your thighs, get it bestie - OMG I HAVENT SEEN THIS EPISODE IN FOREVER I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE STOLAS - GET IT STOLASSSSSSSSSS - this is literally the coolest sequence - OWL IN A CAGE INSTRUMENTAL SPOTTED - bryce pinkham the line delivery of "how the FHUCK-" was perfect - this whole scene is perfect - HELP THE DHORKS LOOK SO CONCERNED AFTER BITZ AND STOLAS MAKE OUT - yeah this is the best episode so far, hands down OZZIES - i have never been more not ready - i have no thoughts on the beginning ngl - ugh the lust ring is so beautifully drawn, really some of vivzie's best backgrounds - not the bouncer dude implying that three people can't make one couple 🙄 - "that's a mood, gabriella" LITERALLY ONE OF THE BEST STOLAS LINES - his date outfit is so pretty - THE BOOKS ON HIS CHAIR HELP HOW DID I NEVER NOTICE THAT - blitz is so frustrating right now FUCKING TALK TO HIM INSTEAD OF SYPING ON M&M YOU PERVERT - FIZZZZZZ BABYYYY - damn imagine blitz realizing his ex-best friend and celebrity ex are at the same club as him while he's on a "date" with a goetia that must be fucking embarassing - fizz's "let's fuck him up babe" look is my favorite thing - house of asmodeus is peak songwriting, like i don't think vivzie will ever top this (i fucking hope she does though) - UGH THIS MAN'S VOICE - these two are the biggest fucking hypocrites - "you used to have a smoking wife, a kid, you had it all! i hope you didn't give it up, so you and him could get it up" is so gorgeously written and delivered - i could go into a whole analysis on stolitz rn but you could go read any other analysis on this episode and read the same shit so im not gonna - help why did he drive stolas hope? THE MAN CAN TELEPORT - stolas is so expressive i love him - OHHHH QUEEN BEE TAKES PLACE LIKE AT THE TAIL END OF OZZIES THAT MAKES MORE SENSE (queen bee took forever to come out so i was confused, i kinda forgot)

QUEEN BEE - ew i remember hating this episode so much - this feels so unfinished already - this is vivzie voicing the poodle bitch, isn't it - keshaaaaaa - i don't wanna listen to this song ngl - okay but the visuals are kinda good and i do love her voice - this must've taken forever to animate - HELP THE ONE SILENT LOONA LINE MAKES ME CRINGE SO HARD LIKE WHAT WAS SHE SAYING - she sounds like... constantly wasted as fuck - people definitely ship loona and bee don't they - i don't but like... i know someone does - i've heard a lot of people call bee bitchy, and fake, but yall i feel like she's being genuine - help she changes her mind so fucking fast - okay okay i don't hate this episode that much - blitz's little arm wave help - for reference i write all of these between the hours of 10pm and 3am, this is my complete, honest, unfiltered opinion - yeah this episode wasn't as bad as i remembered

[watchingspnagain]

Rewatching The Curious Case of Dean Winchester

Welcome to “Toothpicks and Dimples and Honor Among Thieves: A Supernatural Rewatch Blog” with Lor and Mace!

Up today, s5e7: The Curious Case of Dean Winchester.

Bobby makes a bid to join Sam and Dean’s League of Extraordinary Idjits by playing a supernatural card game with a devilishly handsome magic man, in which the stakes are years of your life instead of money. He loses, because of course he does. And then Dean rushes off to try to win back Bobby’s years. And loses. Because of course he does. So Dean walks out of the game an old man, and the three of them start scrambling to figure out how to beat Hottie McCardshark. (Folks, this dude is ATTRACTIVE.) And then Sammy, who has been feeling that Dean is treating him like a little kid - you guessed it - plays to save Dean. No one seems to think he can do it, but of course he pulls through with an impressive bluff. Amongst all the card playing, there’s a sweet and sad little story about the cardshark’s wife being unhappy with their everlasting lot, and a not-so-sweet side bit with Bobby being ableist and sexist.

Mace:

boys are looking fine in their suits as per yooosh

Lor:

RIGHT?

BOBBY

Mace:

grumpy gus

Lor:

LOL Bobby

"may I use your facilities, ma'am" you sure can, sugar

Mace:

HA

“like either of us will live that long”

jfc boys

Lor:

right? wraps them in blankets

DEAN

Mace:

OMG THE WINK

Lor:

RIGHT?

"like xbox?" SAM

Mace:

I LOVE THAT HE’S A GAMER

Lor:

YES

Mace:

LORE

Lor:

"stay classy" HAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA

Mace:

HAHAHAHA

Lor:

DRINK!

Mace:

YAS

Lor:

poor Dean. Uncle Bobby is so grumpy at him

Mace:

right?

Lor:

so smooth, Dean

Mace:

take the elevator down… to the home office?

Lor:

LOL

Mace:

BRAINS TRUMPS LEGS

Lor:

"brains trumps legs" HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA

YES

Mace:

oh Bobby you idiot

Lor:

RIGHT?

Mace:

Dean is NOT losing his second father

Lor:

RIGHT?

Mace:

this dude is hot

Lor:

he IS

Dean you IDIOT

oh Bobby, sucks when your kiddos throw your words back at you, huh?

Mace:

omg the toothpick am ded

right?

Lor:

LOL

Mace:

THE ACCENT

Lor:

HE LIKES THE CUT OF HIS JIB

Mace:

I LIKE THE CUT OF HIS

Lor:

LOLOL

Dean you DOPE

stop sacrificing yourself, idjit

Mace:

I wish they’d gotten a better Old Dean

Lor:

RIGHT?

Mace:

EMPEROR PALPATINE HAHAHAHA

Lor:

all the young actors they got to play them were better than this guy

LOL

Mace:

YEP

“SHUT UP SAM” HAHAHA

Lor:

"bobby's an idiot, that's what happened"

LOLOLOLOLOLOL

Mace:

sigh Dean, stop playing the “I’ve been to Hell” card

omg Sam’s smile

Lor:

LOL

Mace:

SAMMY DIMPLE AM DED AGAIN

Lor:

OMG SAM'S FACE

YES

come on, Sammy, he's eighty years old

Mace:

and it’s his own damn fault

Lor:

well THAT is true

Mace:

if he’d eat a salad once a year that would help

Lor:

you two can go out together for your early salads

Mace:

AHAHAHA

MISSION PATHETIC

“they’re harmless” HAHAHAHA

Lor:

LOL

Mace:

god, he’s attractive

Lor:

aw he's not a murderer

Mace:

OMG HE WINKED

Lor:

"well hooray for you" I love Bobby so much

Mace:

ugh, this self-pity stuff is getting tired, Bobby

Lor:

yeah

and I don't love the message about disability

Mace:

right?

Lor:

god his accent

Mace:

YAS

and he’s got the whole thieves code of honor thing and that’s so hot

Lor:

RIGHT?!

Mace:

omg the dance

Lor:

SAMMY

Mace:

YAS

Lor:

YES

Mace:

this guy is so good

Lor:

he really is

Mace:

i want him to have a spinoff

Lor:

oooo

Mace:

this is such a good ep

besides the old Dean dude

Lor:

YEP

"which time?"

BOBBY

Mace:

HA

Lor:

"you're not useless, Bobby" you tell him, Dean

Mace:

yeah, maybe also open up like this with YOUR BROTHER

Lor:

RIGHT?

"I can't do this without you"

Mace:

a lil manipulative, but I suppose I’ll allow it

Lor:

aw his dumb brimful eyes

LOL

"we done feeling our feelings"

HEY. stop with the gender essentialism, Bobby

Mace:

growing lady parts? smacks Bobby upside and tells him he wishes he could be so lucky

Lor:

EXACTLY

[charnelhouse]

omg but imagine a crossover event where red has worked with the TF! boys on a few missions before joining the 141 and then all of a sudden both teams have to work together on a new mission!!! Imagine how chaotic Benny and Red would be together, how casually affectionate Benny is towards Red and how much he makes her laugh. Ghost would be over in a corner just sipping his whiskey and thinking how pretty she is when she laughs and how he loves seeing this playful side of her come out and her just being carefree and he’s so freaking in love. Like Benny doesn’t even register as a threat he’s just that American twink who’s best mates with his girl and his brother is also kinda cool?? Like Simons made a new friend and Soap is all pouty because he’s been trying so hard to get the LT to like him and yet here he is w another man 😭😭 cheating on him 😭😭. Santi and Price are just in the corner shaking their heads at this mob wondering what the fuck they did to bring down this level of punishment on themselves, what kind of cosmic karma has led them to trying to corral these idiots into an actual working military team. Frankie, Alejandro and Rudy are just vibing w each other like heck these are my hermanos pls never leave me three musketeer shit.

((In case it wasn’t obvious this is a drunken ramble after hitting the town and being unable to get these men out of my head))

I love you Charnie ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😘😘😘

Hahahaha amazing

will and ghost would actually get along quite well

[having-conniptions]

Love In The Air episode 12 live reaction under the cut (long post)

I can't believe there's only one more episode left after this one (and then I'll move on to The Wedding Plan for their cameos obviously)

Awww Prapai is helping Sky again <3

"I'm not worried" baby you can drop the tsundere act fr

Sky getting startled and then annoyed every time Pai says "ouch" hahahaha

"You've become sillier since I last saw you" lmao

"He's a gentleboy in the streets, but a freak in the sheets" GENTLEBOY LMAO BYE

AAAWWW PRAPAI IS SO LOVESTRUCK (and Sky is being sneaky about how much he loves Pai but Pai notices awwwww)

Hahaha birthday immediately canceled bc baby wanna go shopping

THIS EPISODE IS CALLED WHEN THE SKY SURRENDERS TO THE WIND aaaaa will Sky finally admit his feelings??

Sky is such a sugar baby fr

Sky smiling like an idiot when Prapai is talking about couples t shirts but telling him "I think there's something wrong with your brain" hahahaha god I love him so much my sassy boiii

He's trying his best to be a tsundere

"People will misunderstand that you're my boyfriend" IS HE NOT?? SKY WTF ARE YOU ON ABOUT smh Mr Emotionally Unavailable better make up his mind

"This guy's my wife not my boyfriend" PAI PLEASE I'M WHEEZING

Aaaaa he brought Sky to his place and he's gonna bring him to the party Prapai is so ready to go official but Sky is not

Also can I just say PRAPAI IN THOSE PANTS

PAI'S CONFESSION 😭❤️😭❤️😭❤️ "When you tell me to stay away, I want you to admit that you want me to stay close. Or when you tell me to get bored, I wanna tell you that I won't." It captured their dynamic so perfectly - here's how I see it: Sky still doesn't believe this thing with Prapai is serious and long-term but he still gave in to his own feelings and desires. He doesn't see a point in going official and he can't admit his true feelings, maybe because if they're not together there won't be a breakup when things "inevitably" end and it won't hurt as much? He's trying to keep a bit of a barrier to protect himself while still indulging in this relationship. But Prapai knows what's behind that barrier and he's breaking it down with earnest feelings and a good amount of cheekiness. In conclusion: AAAAAAAAA

I'M GONNA COUNT THIS AS THEIR FIRST REAL ROMANTIC KISS I'm pretty sure this is the first time they kissed without a sexual context or the "excuse" of it being some sort of "payment". It's the first kiss that's honest and open, all cards on the table, no excuses or facades, no (faked) reluctance, just pure earnest emotion.

Not the mic making fart noises during the kiss tho omg talk about ruining the mood lol

Just rewinded... Sky's hopeful look before the kiss is everything 😭❤️😭❤️

"I want you to kiss me too. I want you to like me." HE SAID IT HE GOT OVER HIS TSUNDERE ACT AND ADMITTED IT AAAAAAA I LOVE THIS FOR THEM

I mean of course it was gonna lead to sex but still the kiss was not about that at all. THAT KISS. WAS EVERYTHING. THAT KISS WAS THE REAL VERSION OF THE ONE PRAPAI HAD IMAGINED. ROMANTIC. EARNEST. AAAAA IT WAS PERFECT

Huh I didn't expect them to actually make it to the party after Sky said he could skip morning classes lmao

The little peck aaaa so casual so sweet Sky still isn't used to this but he loves it

Oh no now he's freaking out about his own feelings again NO BABY DON'T OVERTHINK IT YOU WERE DOING AMAZING

Oh no ex-hookups and new boyfriends do not mix

The way Sky immediately forgot about having to pee lmao

Oh no what is he seeing- OH. The ex-hookup. SKY IS ALREADY TRAUMATIZED THIS HAS GOT TO HURT SO MUCH JUST AFTER HE FINALLY GAVE IN FUUUUUCKKKK

Oh no not another flashback NOT ANOTHER FLASHBACK NOT SKY CRYING MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS IT'S SHATTERING INTO A MILLION PIECES MY POOR BABY SKY

Meanwhile Pai is actually doing his best to get rid of the random boy clinging to him

Prapai is so smooth even when rejecting someone

Why is Sky not confronting him THEY NEED TO CLEAR THIS UP, COMMUNICATE YOU IDIOTS

"I saw your boy. The one you let me borrow. The one who said he loved you so much" FUCKKKK NOOOOO FUCKKKKKK and I can't believe I called that guy pretty, what a fucking asshole FUCK THE FUCK OFF

Meanwhile Sky is having a fucking breakdown in the car while trying to hide it from Pai

AND NOW HE KEEPS BRUSHING HIM OFF AND MAKING EXCUSES NOT TO SEE HIM THIS FUCKING HURTS SO MUCH DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH THIS SHIT HURTS WHAT THE FUCKKKKK

Poor Pai poor Sky my poor babiesssss

Everyone is scared of Prapai lmao

TWO WEEKS????? Christ on a bicycle shoot me now I will never recover from this

And Sky's "I don't even like you" act is back up to 200% AND IT'S FUCKING HEARTBREAKING BECAUSE SKY IS BEING SO FUCKING HURTFUL AND MEAN BELIEVING IT'S JUSTIFIED AND PRAPAI IS HAVING HIS HEART SHATTERED INTO A MILLION PIECES WITH EVERY WORD I CAN'T KEEP WATCHING THIS just the thought of hearing that from someone you love - or saying that to someone you love(d) - freaking KILLS me

At least Pai doesn't really believe it. Though it hurts, he knows in his heart it's not true.

Sig is the fucking MVP

Sky is even gonna move dorms?? MY BABY IS HURTING SO MUCH I CAN'T FVKNG BREATHE OMG THE MEMORIES OF PAI WHEN HE GETS BACK TO HIS OLD DORM

Why did I kinda expect Prapai to be waiting in his room omg THE ANGST I'M GONNA IMPLODE

It's the book with all the notes he took 😭❤️ PROOF to Pai that Sky loves him

Which I guess is good for Pai but rn it's just making things worse for Sky because he still thinks Pai lied to him and used him and now that guy has proof that Sky loved him DID I MENTION THAT THIS HURTS??? BECAUSE IT SURE FUCKING DOES

Omg all of Sky's thoughts during their arc being revealed BUT AT WHAT COST aaaaa why couldn't they just have COMMUNICATED?!?! RIGHT AFTER THE FUCKING PARTY?!?!

"Can you not look for someone else? Can I be the only one for you?" 😭😭😭😭 SKYYYY BABYYYY he really wrote that aaaaa my heart

SKY WAS SO IN LOVE 😭❤️

In Pai's eyes he's proving to Sky there was no reason to break up. In Sky's eyes he's adding insult to injury and humiliating him for being stupid enough to fall for Pai. ARE YOU UNDERSTANDING I WANT TO SCRATCH MY EYES OUT

Ok what I don't like about the love confession is that it happens before they've talked it out so in that moment Sky still feels pathetic for admitting his feelings to a guy who has hurt him and will probably do so again

FINALLY they talked it out. I hope Prapai understands that Sky was not overreacting but actually acting the way anyone with that kind of trauma would act after getting triggered.

"I wonder where you get this idea that I'd get tired of you some day" *panicked look* oh no

But at least Sky is finally talking about it

"You can tell me when you're ready" PRAPAI MY LOVE LEMME GIVE YOU A BIG KISS FOR SAYING THAT MWAH

"Cause love makes me blind" AAAAAAA

Rain's reaction to PrapaiSky dating hahahaha

Sky's reaction to Rain calling Pai shameless ayyyyyy

"Can I kiss you?" PRAPAI DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH YOU MEAN TO ME RIGHT NOW

Bonus scene: WHY U GOTTA HURT ME LIKE THAT AGAIN --- HE WROTE THAT AFTER THE PARTY???? FUUUUCKKKKKK

[inkykeiji]

Clari, I see you missing Dabi 👀👀I must raise you my favorite playlist that someone on YT made for him of all time. It includes voice overs (Japanese voice lines, and also steamy additions around the middle to the end), in case you haven't heard this before!!

https://youtu.be/oQD-356fNM0?si=vqgZyHXPKPh6Aj3b

I love it so much, it's a huge comfort audio to me and I always listen to it when I have to drive from my hometown to the airport in the next city over (Canadians unite 😂😂) I have other playlists with English voice overs but none of them beat this one, aside from glitter's Shiggy/Dabi x Listener playlist (that also has voice overs and is??? WOW). ANYWAY ENOUGH RAMBLING HAHAHAHA!!

i am missing him so so so much today ｡ﾟ･ (>﹏<) ･ﾟ｡ ah omg!!! i’ve never come across this before, thank you so much for sharing it with me (and inadvertently the rest of my blog!!) <333 it’s really thoughtful of you and i appreciate it so much <3 i only listened to the first few minutes and it already has me grinning like a lovesick idiot (*ﾉ▽ﾉ)

[numbknee]

omg more kyman headcanons please, your last ones were *chef’s kiss*

aaaaaa I am SO SORRY I completely missed this ask so apologies if this is a million years late 😭🙏

but alas....I do have many kyman headcanons rattling around in my brain (and a lot of them are displayed in my fics so this is a shameless plug to read those lol...also a lot of this is very horny so I apologize in advance)

when kyle and cartman finally get together, a lot of their external dynamic doesn't really change that much. I adore this post by sludgescribble because it perfectly exemplifies how I see established relationship kyman: arguing until the cows come home but still holding hands. still being huge fuckin idiots, still obsessed with each other, still very much in love

I like the idea of kyle going into counseling or something else psychology-related because of the post-covid specials (and also i'm a psychology ho), but I can't for the life of me imagine an actual career that cartman would settle on.

I would think cartman would be the type to do odd-jobs for his whole life, never settling on one thing but jumping around from place-to-place where he thinks he would make the most money in the quickest amount of time possible, maybe running a drug ring or a dog-fighting circuit or whatever before moving on to the next thing. either that.... or he just becomes a fuckin rabbi lmao. I totally lost my shit at that in the post-covid episode because it was the COMPLETE fucking opposite of what I (and I'm sure a lot of other viewers) expected from him. but leave it to cartman to keep us on our toes every goddamn step of the way. also I'm sorry but rich CEO cartman just doesn't do it for me. he needs to be in a position of power, but simultaneously that position needs to be... kind of lame and unconventional.... like a mall cop or some shit. hahahaha

(now onto shmekshy stuff again I'M SORRY) kyle takes a while to admit to himself how much he's physically attracted to cartman because... denial and conventional beauty standards are strong forces to be reckoned with. but once he does, he's fuckin OBSESSED. all of cartman's thick, muss-able hair, his deceptively cute and innocent-looking face and huge brown puppy-dog eyes, every curve and swell of soft flesh on cartman's body... kyle goes FUCKING INSANE whenever they get intimate because he's subconsciously making up for all the time he missed being in denial lol. also he's more similar to his dad than he likes to admit: he likes his lovers strong-willed and chubby... lmaooooo

I may have implied this before but cartman is actually a HUUUUGE masochist. he's shown to have some sadistic tendencies in the show (see all of ginger cow) but the underlying vibe I get is that his performative sadism is a huge cope for what he ACTUALLY wants, because we've been shown that he gets off of being taken advantage of (i'm SO SORRY for that link) which.... is kind of fucked up but hey kinks are like that sometimes. and god knows this kid has an insanely fucked-up relationship to sex in general (which I also wrote a fic about lol. also kyle is a sadist in denial too LOOOOOL)

they end up doing A LOT of shit together throughout the course of their relationship. they travel the world. they stop the world from exploding a few times. they nearly kill each other on several occasions. they save each other's lives on even more occasions. they go to other planets because eventually the tom-fuckery of their hometown becomes too much to be self-contained. they somehow destroy reality but end up stitching it whole again at the same time. and through it all.... they stay together. because they both know deep down that they simply cannot live in a world without the other. they are irrevocably intertwined. think that quote of stephen colbert talking about his wife but like slightly more fucked up and with a few poop jokes thrown in

[parcequecestnotreprojeeeet]

Hello! It's Winter. One Didier fic coming up! LOL.

He watched intently as his wife spoke passionately on her cell phone. It was almost time for bed, but she had answered a call while they were removing their decorative pillows from their bed.

Distracted by his wife’s wholesome laughter, Emmanuel could no longer concentrate on his book. He felt his face burn red when he noticed the way she playfully touched her diamond necklace - a gift from him. Once she bit her bottom lip and whispered, Oooh I love that idea. You're the best, he lost it.

“Get off!” Emmanuel whispered in a harsh tone. He wasn’t playing around anymore.

Only now, when she looked him in the face, did Brigitte realize her husband was serious. She quickly said goodbye to the person on the other end and hung up. 

“What’s wrong?” she asked, throwing her cell phone across the bed. 

“Who were you talking to? You were practically giddy.” Emmanuel huffed. “Please tell me it was one of the children!” 

She closed her eyes, preparing herself for the shitstorm that was about to happen. “It was Didier. We were talking about our event.” 

“Didier??!! What did he say that made you laugh so hard?” 

Brigitte rolled her eyes, “I wasn’t laughing that hard. We were remembering something funny a small child said to us. Stop acting jealous!”

“JEALOUS? How do you expect me to react? Hearing my wife giggle on the phone with another man is not a comforting feeling. If I wasn’t in the room, would you have started touching yourself?” He asked, spitting as he spoke.

“Are you fucking insane!?!? What the hell is wrong with you!? I can’t believe you just asked me that!” Brigitte rushed to the door, but Emmanuel grabbed her. 

“Where are going? This conversation isn’t done!” Emmanuel yelled.

“YES, IT IS! I can’t believe you think I am physically attracted to Didier. Or think I would touch…. AH! You need to think before you speak.” Brigitte scolded him. "I would never have phone sex with another man!"

He took a deep breath, regretting the words he had said to her. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said what I did. However, you should know, by now, how upset I get when you speak about Didier.” Emmanuel sulked. "He's a sore topic."

“I don’t understand why! I am happily married to YOU! I would never do anything to jeopardize our marriage.” Brigitte said, opening their bedroom door. 

“Where are you going? Aren’t you coming to bed?” Emmanuel asked, realizing his words cut her deeply. He knew how hot their phone sex was, and he couldn't imagine sharing his wife - in that way - with another man. But it was stupid of him to allow that thought to enter his brain.

Brigitte took a deep breath. “You know when people say you shouldn’t joke around? Well, I was only kidding. That wasn’t Didier on the phone. I was speaking to our future son-in-law. I just wanted to tease you into thinking it was Didier so you could get all jealous and sexy. And then we could have wild, passionate sex… but unfortunately, you took it too far with your comment.” She admitted before walking out of the room. “I’ll be down the hall. Maybe I'll see you for breakfast."

Hellooo Winter! ❤️

Omg 😂 I knew something was coming 😂 hahahahahaha Brigitte wanting a bit of foreplay pretending to be Didier on the phone to make him jealous and have some nice passionate sex, and Emmanuel just ruining the all thing with his big mouth 😭 Hopefully he learned the lesson hahahaha even tho being an idiot and the promise of what could’ve been a great night, will probably serve as enough punishment 😂

Thank you so much, Winter! ❤️❤️❤️

[myyoungroyalsblog]

Liveblog of Gåsmamman season 6 (so spoilers, obviously)

Episode 1

Everyone needs to hug a cow every once in a while😔

Wow is that prison??

Omfg the kid in the car afahsghsgshs

Uhhh how can you just "check" the dark web?? Is it easy or what? Lmao

Fuck, the kids and the kids kids FUCK

Omg not the kid (I don't think she would ever harm the kid but uhhh trauma?? Jfc)

FUCK NINAAAAAAA

Fuck and now Linus

Jfc shit

Holy fuck

Oh god he's gonna find out now😭

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

"Am I dead?" OMG😭😭😭😭😭

Awwww the hug!!!!!!!

Also is he wearing a wedding ring??

Episode 2

Poor baby😭 "I wanna see mama" ahhhhhhh

Are they gonna put her in prison so that she kills Sonja?

Lol I thought that was Fabian for a sec

HOLY FUCK WHAT THE FUCK

What the hell? A fire?

Woah wtf is that even legal??? Jesus christ

Oh fucking new that guard was iffy

Of course they take the wrong person🙄

Who is this bitch?

Oh god she ain't gonna get to the apartment is she?

What the fuck hahahaha she escaped??

Yeah no people don't remember what the fuck you wrote on your CV lmao

Oh shit Emil might lose his job

None of those kids better get hurt or die istg

FUCKING KNEW IT AFSHSGSHDGHSGSGS I HAD A GUT FEELING EMIL WAS IN ON IT

Episode 3

Sonja you can't complain about an ankle monitor are you kidding me???

Omg Linus leaning on his mum my heart😭

Omg the snow is so beautiful!!!!!

Holy shit he was married (did that happen in s5 and I forgot? Lol)

But what if HE is the leak??? Ahhhhh

Hockey? Lmao

Oh that fucker GET HIM GUSTAV

Shit shit shit are they gonna follow him??

Holy FUCK

God poor girl

Vera shut the fuck up

Ohh the piano music is very nice

Oh fuck yeah Gustav is smart😌

Sooooo many secret🙄

Linus heard..... Is he gonna run away again?

Ohh family drama

Fucking knew he was gonna leave

Ohh Lukas helped him (I think?)

But like where the fuck is he gonna go? Can he even drive??

Oop Richard dead

Episode 4

Jfc another chase🙄

Fucking hellllll they know where they are

Preeeetty sure that wasn't Linus who took the photos Zac

I am scared for Linus here ahhhhhh

Oh shit it was, for the passports?

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK RUNNNNN

Fuck

Fucking Dante

Ahhh fuck yeah that was awesome lmao

Okay that was like a tranquilizer or smt right?

Episode 5

Of course the vest lol I forgot about that

Dramaaaaaaaa

I mean I understand Zac, Fredrik is in danger and the bad guys won't hesitate to hurt a child, but I also understand Nina wanting to help her mum

I hate it when my gut is right, that kid seemed in on all this shit (maybe he framed Richard???)

They made themselves a snack wtf afsjsgsh

Did Zac take Linus??

Vera asked for Linus??

FUCK OH YOU ARE SHITTING ME ZAC

Zac you fucking idiot you think they aren't going to hurt him???? Seriously??? FUCK

What the fuck are they making?

Ohhhh Zac I hate you so much right now

Oh

Fuck

Well

Shit

HOLY FUCKING SHIT FUCK

Fuck

And Fredrik????? Without a dad??? And Nina won't know FUCK

Episode 6

Oh wow she old

So I guess she does go to jail in the end?

Oh fuck yeah Gustav you smart son of a bitch

Fuck you Vera for hurting a fucking kid FUCK

I mean if you're gonna raid a place and save a kid better be discreet and not blare your fucking sirens at top volume what the fuck

Why did Dante talk and not shoot Vera? Hello????

SONJA KILL HER

Vera told Linus about Zac right?

Yeah Linus knows Zac's dead

Fuck

Is Winston Barry's son? Idk

Oh shit they are listening

OH SHIT

Jesus fucking christ

But as well Linus needs to say that Zac fucking kidnapped him, like that's why Sonja did what she did

Oh shit Linus called Gustav

Holy shit a bomb????

But they got them ig after YEARS

Awww the graveyard😟

Holy shit hell of a tattoo wow

Ohh Nina found someone

Okay so this is in the future

Did Linus get married??

UM

UM

UM

UUUUUUUUMMMMMMMM

That is so fucking weird no adahsfshsgs

But awww cute bride!!!!

Now go shave that beard afshsgshdh

How many times has Nina changed her hair hahahahahha love the new look!!

Oh you are shitting me

The minute she is out...... WHAT THE FUCK

Oh

Wait

WHAT

OKAY I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT AFSHSGDJDHDHDGSHSG WHAT

That was some twilight shit right there

I mean I think she's right

Hahahaha FINALLY THEY KISS LMAO

Oh wow

Okay then

Yeah that might have been the best thing for her kids

But like what the hell

👑

Well....... What a ride adahsgdhdgdh glad it didn't end with Linus's beard cause that thing is gonna haunt me in my nightmares afshshdjdh but maybe now the family can live "normally" idk

So many emotions right now I can't even think afajsgsjshd

[citrusreadstoa]

Reading The Dark Prophecy: Chapter 3 (SPOILERS)

"Some old lady drops the mic / And kills everyone" That's a much larger mic than I expected. Or the people are a lot smaller. Maybe both.

"I volunteer for death!" Insert Katniss jokes. Apollo, I understand the situation was dire, but...

"What would you consider yourself, Calypso? A Titan? A demi-Titan?" Exactly what I've been wondering since she was introduced in The Battle of the Labyrinth. She exists in, like, a weird limbo zone (Hey, just like her island!). "Calypso cleared her throat with a noise that sounded suspiciously like idiot." So she considers herself an idiot? Got it.

"You're breaking my rhythm." Oh gods, is he singing this? "most worthless of teens!" Every time they repeat this, I am reminded that they're trying to make this somewhat musical and I just. I can't keep a straight face.

"making his way toward the bulldozer under the guise of an interpretive dance routine" I'd love to see this. I can guarantee you that what he's doing is so painfully obvious that the only reason he hasn't been called out yet is because the blemmyae don't want to accidentally insult his "dancing."

"Vary your adjectives" Cut her some slack, she's halfway into shock. She's doin' her best.

"stapled the bulldozer operator . . . right where his actual eyes would be." AAAAHHHHH my worst fear being realized! "Our friend is only giving you a dramatic interpretation of how we beat the Cyclopes." HAHAHAHA this poor little pathetic excuse--

"They're getting away!" "No, not at all! . . . You see, we traveled for many weeks like this..." I am fully laughing now. Also, many weeks? Half of it I chalk up to Apollo's exaggerated interpretation of events which he admittedly does all the time and not a single word out of his mouth when he's recalling a story can be trusted, and the other half I attribute to Festus being wonky. "Imagine you are Camp Half-Blood . . . and we are traveling away from you." HAHAHAHAHAAAA

"our getaway ride shuddered to a halt." Wow, I expected the bulldozer to last a lot longer. More than a page, at least. All that interpretive dance for nothing...

"The naming celebration is in three days" Is someone being born? Is a new building being opened? If it's a baby, I hope the baby doesn't end up dying or something. It's innocent in all this! "the main attractions in his slave procession!" Meg got demoted by a lot, huh?

"Suddenly an arrow" ARTEMIS. Don't even finish your sentence. It's Artemis. "A shrill whistle" NEVER MIND, IT'S HER HUNTERS. I don't need to read further. It's the Hunters. Every time a whistle sounds in these three series, I swear, it's the Hunters. Every time they describe the Hunters of Artemis entering a scene, it's gradual and dramatic with clue after clue in separate sentences or even paragraphs like, first it's an arrow. Then there's the whistle. And the wolves. And then some girl does a dramatic pose in an iconic parka like jumping down and landing in front of them or epically lowering a bow from on top of a tree far away. It's the moviest cinema thing ever.

"this woman was at least sixty years old" What??? I was so convinced. There wouldn't be any Hunters this old, right? I know they've made some exceptions for older teens, but this seems pushing it.

"sweeping red targeting lasers in every direction." Awfully modern technology for them.

"And that ghost you saw--that was Agamethus." Agamethus? I only know Brieanna. Is this some kind of underground resistance against the Triumvirate? Have we officially met the communists?

"the bomb-diggity." "Thank you.. I think." Hey! You never question when someone calls your crossbow trinkets the bomb-diggity! It's the highest of compliments.

"'If you knew Zoë, then you must be one of my sister's Hunters. But you can't be. You're...' I stopped myself before I could say old and dying." Good job, Apollo. OMG is this an ex-Hunter who broke her oath? Did she fall in love with someone and have to leave? If she is, it would explain the dramatic entrance. Holy geez, what if it was Apollo? 'Cause he keeps flirting with his sister's Hunters, it wouldn't be surprising if it worked at least once.

"Come, I'll take you to the Waystation." Holy guacamole, this is an underground resistance. It's all about the principle, baby!

[jalapenobee]

Chapter 6! Can't believe I'm already halfway through this! :(

I'm still not sure what Touma does for a living. "Thug" is so broad, like, what does it mean?

Oh no, does that mean he's gonne get injured at some point?? Oh no......

"why do you sell music when you don't sell?" MEGU JFC!! no filter huh

Yeah, that's the spirit, Sentarou....

No for real, Sentarou reminds me so much of Kazuki xD They both have no chill, I love it!

Wait, Touma really is part of the yakuza??

I always suck at understanding criminal stuff xD They literally explain it and I'm still all "heih??"

this is so funny without context it's funny with context too

Oh, Sentarou's quitting? Is he going to write for himself now?

MEGURU YOU'RE 6 STAY AWAY FROM THE BEER OMG

Your honour, they're so dumb, I love them!

OMG GET THE KID AWAY FROM THE BEER

Oh no, not Sentarou acting. If his acting's as good as his singing, this is gonna go downhill fast

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

WHAT?????

WHAT????

YEAH SAME, TOUMA

AAHHH MEGU I LOVE HOW SHE'S NOT EVEN BOTHERED BY IT! SHE'S LIKE "yeah I could smell this from miles away, you fcking idiots" AAHHHHHH!!!

AAHHHH I DID NOT SEE THIS COMING SO EARLY ON!!! I'M SO HAPPY!! IT'LL DEFINITELY ALL GO UPHILL FROM HERE AND NOTHING BAD'S GOING TO HAPPEN HAHAHAHA!!!

- thug like sus :)

- meguru shh!!!! be nice to him hes trying his best okay TvT

- sentarou is such a lame adult i love him

- YESSSSSSSS (its bc hes blond isn't it.....the blond ones are always the malewives....)

- papaya~ papaya~ papaya~ meguru and touma look so done TvT

- DONT! GIVE! KIDS! ALCOHOL! YOU! STUPID! ADULTS!!!

- even meguru knows these guys are sketchy.....

- THE SCREAMING LMAOOOO

- LIKE HUH

- I FREAKED OUT TOO

- meguru is just disappointed it took this long dfmgdgk her stupid dad's are too oblivious

- AHAHA YEP NOTHING BAD :))))