#i might be a bit of a nerd

[badlywrittenfilth]

Currently utterly fascinated by the noble paladin to slutty little warlock whorelock pipeline. Specifically the tantalizing, uniquely awkward period of dual patronage.

After weeks of strange, unusual dreams - so vivid, so depraved; she knows they should be terrifying, but she can't bring herself to frame them as anything other than intoxicating, alluring - she breaks down and accepts the pact offered by the devil that's orchestrated her nightly torments; it's only a dream, after all...Isn't it?

It isn't until she, or perhaps the whole party, are in dire straits and an unsettlingly familiar voice rings out in her mind, offering to save them all...If she'll only invoke the pact, that she realizes the reality of her situation, and the source new, bizarre strain of calling on her divine gifts becomes clear. At the last possible moment, desperate to survive, she calls out not to her divine master - who's gifts have failed to protect her friends, but to invoke the profane pact.

Eldritch power courses through her, and, with ease, she rallies her allies and together they vanquish the threat - thanks to her new secret. But with every action, movement and spell under his influence, she feels the bond to her god weakening, ever so slightly, the light growing the tiniest bit dimmer, more distant. She should be afraid, she realizes, but how can she be when it feels so good?

As her dark patron's gift fades, she feels empty, incomplete. The light doesn't fill the void, and she doesn't know if she truly wants it to, no matter how much she tells herself she does. No matter how fervently she tries, no matter how she prays, the counsel she seeks from senior paladins and high ranking clerics, what evils she purges, and penances she undertakes, no matter how long she strains to resist, she can't truly deny that deep, secret yearning to give in, to beg her new patron master owner for more.

And she knows that every time she yields, she'll lose a little more of the paragon of virtue and justice that she was, and become a little more His perfect playing. Just as the pact decrees.

[curtain-caller]

You know what? I like you *Turns your nameless faceless MC into a character*

[shanklin]

Stanford never became friends with Fiddleford.

Instead he got himself a different small friend group who cares a lot about him. At least about the Ford he pretended to be in college.

A kind, soft spoken formerly bullied genius who researches very dull stuff in Oregon and definitely not anything weird. Their Ford would never break any rules or ignore safety measures [unlike that other student they heard about during their college years.]

And then Ford stops answering their calls and loses his grant. 

It’s time for an intervention and they start pestering Ford with letters and calls until he finally agrees to meet them at a science convention, but he’ll take his brother with him.

They’re relieved! Ford is with Shermie! They like Shermie! It's a good thing that Ford still has one brother who isn't a good for nothing selfish criminal who destroyed his entire future!

If they ever get their hands on Ford’s evil twin they’ll make sure he’ll regret ever messing with their friend. Ford is too nice for revenge. They aren’t.

Meanwhile at the not-yet Mystery Shack, the Stans freshly survived their own angsty canon divergent tale of two stans AU and locked Bill out of Ford's mind like a week ago.

Stan: I don’t know how long Ford will keep me around but this will be good for him. He needs some friends to take care of him after I inevitably get kicked out again!

Ford: I only agreed to this because Stan insisted and I still haven’t found a way to thank him and apologize. I hope all my “friends” die in a fire.

[starscream-is-my-wife]

Skywarp where I want to try to explain outlier powers

Context for Megatron having space powers from the Transformers cartoon production bible:

That's awesome, I miss gun megatron so much

[casin0table]

AU idea where not only did Peter get shot after If I Loved You (Reprise),, but due to all three nerds dying on school grounds which were built up by the Waylons and would have mystical properties (I know, not realistic but let me dream) would all be passive ghosts haunting the school eternally.

“to the nerds”

[emily-mooon]

@jancyweeks Day 1: History + AU

Historical AU Jancy my beloved <33333

Ok maybe more like vintage vaguely 30’s (heck maybe even 40’s or 50’s) jancy

It’s a redraw of this Saturday Evening Post cover from 1930 by E.M. Jackson (it’s called Crescent Moon Couple). I found it while looking for a completely different piece by J.C. Leyendecker

I did add two things so now they are having a picnic on the moon :]

[pigeonstab]

I need more Feldspar & Gabbro interactions in my life

[starlingfawn]

throws more squid art at you

listen to this,,!!!!!

[coffeelomort]

Considering that Ruta's song has a higher BPM than I think anyone was expecting, I thought I'd list out each song and its BPM (taken from the official lyrics uploaded to the site) to figure out which one was actually "fastest".

EVER RED: 143

Aozora no Memory: 185

ALL SO BAD: 223

Your Melody: 154

Key My Notes: 224

Charcoal White: 126

Yotsuba Tsuzuri no Rhapsody: ??? (Seems like they forgot to include the BPM for this one)

Haikei Akatsuki Someru Niji Yo: 200

BUBBLE: 133

Bouquet of Wishes: 146

I'm Stitch Dot: 130

Nagaki Hitomi no Sirius: 100

As of now, only the instrumentals and official lyrics for up to Nagaki Hitomi no Sirius has been released, but using one of those likely not entirely accurate online calculators, I got the following for the songs available on streaming services:

Yotsuba Tsuzuri no Rhapsody: 104

Tied 2 Order: 141

So overall, it seems like Blue Bouquet is actually taking the crown overall for fastest tempos (especially with Key My Notes and Haikei Akatsuki Someru Niji Yo being both 200+, and AoMemo being 180+).

[sysig]

Cards 👏 cards 👏 cards 👏 (Patreon)

[nathaniel-underwood-is-an-intj]

Post Ptolemy's Gate ramble

So I just finished Ptolemy's Gate, thoughts are a bit all over the place and aside from mentioning the obvious I thought I'd dump some thoughts here.

Piper's apathy certainly shocked me. I know she's stressed running the council and she's got loads of organisation to do but oof she sure did come across as cold in her conversation with Kitty. Kitty has that kind of apathetic resignation of grief but it really felt like Piper had already put it behind her despite it only being two days before. Her boss that she worked for died horribly to save them all and she didn't even seem to share a quiet moment of grief with Kitty idk it just felt a little brutal 😅 I had an impression of her being really sweet so I was a bit taken aback.

One thing that really stood out to me was Nathaniel's apathy to the situation, I found it really interesting. I guess something could be said about it being the magician in him.

Nathaniel really has this duality to him, the obvious being Nat vs John Mandrake and of course Nat + Bartimaeus but in chapter 36 part ii something that caught my attention

'it was the feeling of consummate superiority, the delight of power weilded without peril. He danced beneath the night sky, smiting down his enemies.'

It already seems as if he's being elevated to something other- a martyr perhaps, except martyrs have causes and ideals, they do something because they have a strong belief in their justness. And Nathaniel:

'He felt aloof disconnected and alone. If his hatred for demons he had killed was dull and almost matter-of-fact, so was his sympathy for the people whose lives he saved.'

So he seems almost like an avenging angel, I love the religious imagery, especially because it seems to call back to Bartimaeus comparing his body to a holy mosque. But also divine rage is the driving force for an avenging angel and he's no longer even angry at the destruction caused.

'Pride spurred him on.' this almost makes him seem God-like?? His sole motivator is the pride of a deity, and I love that. But it's also just very true to him as a boy, pride spurred him on against Lovelace and against Duval and Whitwell.

When he's alone with Bartimaeus he's taken on this air of not being entirely human. He feels alone and solitary from everything including humaity. But when he rejoins Kitty, Piper and the rest of the magicians waiting for him he's reinvigorated - 'he felt a surge of joyful impatience - 'he would detroy Nouda, rescue the commoners and return to Kitty.' it seems as though he has to be surrounded by people to remind himself he's one of them. It could be seen as an effect of sharing a mind with Bartimaeus, but of course it could be Nathaniel's own human pride and his memories of being othered even as a child. Just gives the impression of this human / higher entity duality.

But also I partly got the impression that this hints to depression- I'm sure it's hardly out of the realm of possibility for Nat to have it. Though it's never stated I think several moments in the books make a good argument for it, including the above- just the numbness to everything. And I guess the sudden change in demeanor at 'surge of joyful impatience' can be read as hopefulness, but it reminded me of the saying that when people have decided to follow through on their s*icidal ideation they come across as happy and like a weight has been lifted from them. Nathaniel is impressively calm for someone who realises he's gravely injured. And while he can be seen as a martyr or hero for his final actions, the hollowness he felt at that moment gives it a more bitter edge.

I think it's made even more sad when compared to Anthony Lockwood, who has that same sense of pride - because he's trying to make his dead parents proud and because he's trying to hide the fact that he doesn't like himself very much. Nathaniel gives this same impression. And Lockwood at the end had reason to be proud, he uncovered a huge conspiracy, his agency became the most famous in London. And Nathaniel had reason to be proud; he's managing to wield the staff of his childhood hero, something he had dreamed of doing, he's had the bravery to unite with a spirit and he's going to take down the biggest threat to London.

But Lockwood gets something Nathaniel doesn't-

There's this subtle idea seen through Lucy's eyes that Lockwood's biggest achievement was fighting through his s*icidal ideation and discovering he has something to live for, even just seeing his friends again.

And Nathaniel just doesn't get that moment.

He sort of acknowledges that he doesn't have to be a powerful leader, that he doesn't need his colleagues approval, that he doesn't need to erase the fear the commoners have of him and other magicians, but without these things he doesn't know what to do with himself. He has no plan for the future, because even before he's injured the idea of a future doesn't seem to have much appeal to him. He already appears to have given up on trying to uncover who Nathaniel is, depite finally having the opportunity to. Like after everything- being beaten, the fear of his colleagues trying to harm him and burying himself in the John Mandrake persona to protect his sensitive side- he doesn't want to uncover the remnants of that boy because he's worried it'll be too difficult to put himself back together.

Or maybe he feels that he already has discovered who Nathaniel is, a deeply unhappy, hollow shell of a person, whose personality has been pulled in so many directions he no longer has a sense of self. He's been stripped back to the barest version of himself and found he doesn't even have the foundations upon which to rebuild himsef. Like discovering dry rot in your walls and you keep pulling and pulling bits of rotting wood away from the home until you've finally got it all, only to realise the house has come down around you- there's nothing left.

He doesn't get this moment where he works through his trauma, where he realises he has a support system, where he realises he's loved. I don't know if Nathaniel ever really knew what it felt like to be loved. I don't think he did. Ptolemy's death was awful and heartbreaking but his short life was filled with affection. And Lockwood realises people do care about him, depite being told that no one does. It hurts so much that Nat felt isolated and alone his whole life, right up to the last minute. Potential love confessions aside, Nathaniel never got a chance to sit and bathe in the warmness of affection. Like Bartimaeus tells him, it's about 'being not doing.' Nathaniel never got to understand the importance of just being, of simply existing as himself or of being happy. He constantly had to be working on the next goal, the next plan, because if he stops working he'll be forced to sit with his thoughts and realise how unhappy he is. And the thought of that is just too much to bear, it's so much easier to give in.

The ending gave the impression of being very romantic, while sad. Nathaniel gets to be remembered as a hero and never has to confront the consequences of his actions with wars in Europe and America that he had a direct role in. Acknowledging his role and dealing with fallout are two very different mountains to climb. And I think that idea of dying like a hero perfectly appeals to Nathaniel's prideful tendencies, and maybe he views it that way to hide the fact it's a convenient way out of his unhappiness and confronting what he's done. It's quite interesting to see that after he's been stripped back to nothing and can't figure out who or what he wants to be if he gets the chance, he still has that vanity and arrogance to him- despite not really being good character traits, they're so authentically Nathaniel, he's been that way right from the start and it's nice little peak of the real him at the end, being so humanly flawed.

[ifindus]

1660 - Cavalryman - Several wars under Denmark against Sweden.

1697 - Gunner - pre-Great Nordic War under Denmark against Sweden.

1774 - Skiing Soldier - pre-Theater War under Denmark against Sweden.

1785 - Infantryman - pre-Great Northern War under Denmark against Sweden.

1808 - Coast Guard Officer - Napoleonic Wars under Denmark.

1845 - Infantryman - pre-First Schleswig War under Sweden against Germany.

1855 - Infantryman - during the Crimean War (Sweden-Norway debated joining the UK and France against Russia).

1905 - Hunter - preparing for wars of independence against Sweden.

1914 - Engineer Officer - First World War.

1940 - Infantry Officer - Second World War.

[glitch1997]

Being AroAce be like

[venlazlo]

Fields of Mistria Birthday Approximations

Still in an art rut so I calculated all their birthdays on the Gregorian Calendar under the read more for those that like to draw their favorite characters on their birthdays.

edit: compressed into a single image

Also the math isn't perfect so I will list all the flaws in the data and my own calculations at the end but I am pretty confident in what I have managed to achieve so far. The fat chunk of text at the end is by no means required reading but may answer some questions that may arise.

edit: sorry forgot abt Adeline. Shes Jan 26

Jan 1-3 Errol 7-10 Darcy*

Feb 9-11 Hemlock March 11-13 Ryis 31 - Olric

April 1-2 Olric 19-21 March

May 5-8 Luc*

June 4-6 Elsie 17-19 Vera

July 7-9 Balor 13-15 Celine 19-21 Josephine

August 1-3 Eiland 14-16 Nora 21-23 Maple 30-31 Valen*

September 1-2 Valen* 9-11 Landen 16-18 Merri

October 5-7 Reina 12-14 Holt 18-20 Dozy 31 Louis

November 1-2 Louis 7-9 Teritha 20-22 Juniper

December 6-8 Dell 19-21 Henrietta 22-24 Hayden

*The middle date of the range is my assumed option. (i.e Reina is October 5-7 so I'll just assume Oct 6) *This is based on the Northern Hemisphere since it snows in Mistria. Spring 1 translated to our calendar would be equivalent to March 1-4. *There was an extra day that could not be equally distributed so I picked a day that would be ultimately inconsequential. (Feb. 28/Winter 28) Aside from the estimated dates, putting it anywhere else only makes it so Henrietta has one day in Capricorn. and changes the bullet point above. *Darcy, Luc, and Valen have four days while everyone has three bc 365/112 produces a decimal value (3.26) so I evenly distributed an additional day to every 1st, 5th, 9th, 13th, 17th, 21st, and 25th day. >>This decision was unfortunately subjective. As opposed to doing the 4th, 8th, 12th, 16th, 20th, 24th, & 28th which would have affected the following: >>>Vastly increased the list of 4 day estimates to Ryis, March, Balor, Josephine, Eiland, Nora, Landen, Reina, Dozy, Louis, and Hayden. This puts too much guess work on a "center" day >>>Everyone's estimated dates are effectively shifted by -1. >>>March Would still be either an Aries or Taurus without a skew towards either, Maple would be a pure Leo, Juniper would be a pure Scorpio, and Hayden would have one day in Capricorn. >>>Had this been the decision, I would have probably put the extra day into March 1st/Spring 1 purely because the thought to do the days divisible by 4 was an afterthought and I'm too lazy to retype all the numbers and putting the extra day on Spring 1 just realigns everyone with the data presented above.

Thank you for reading!

p.s. if someone can get me Caldarus' birthday bc I have seen that screenshot where he tells you that it is his birthday but it does not show the in-game UI so the date is not visible. There's a random gaming article that lists it as Spring 25(May18-20 Taurus) but I do not trust any of them to do their jobs right honestly.

[tiny-planet-13]

AND IF I SAID THIS WAS LITERALLY JEREJEAN (I'm actually losing my mind on this one like oh my god)

[greennoobartist]

What would be a good last name for Shadow to have? Do you have any headcanons for that? (Modern aus are hard)

:)

You're gonna regret this...

no, i definitely did not make a Samsung note for this ask to yap no nonononononononono definitely no nope... ....

....

....

Lemme try to comprehend and connect how tf do I get asks like this which are 1. On a topic I love to experiment with and literally do it on every character in the universe of the online media and think about 24 a day 7 days a week and helped idk how many people with this and 2. On a day when im feeling cheerful on a dangerous level which means that i have issues with controlling how im talking and if it's understandable or not!! (aka the hyperactive demon possessed me so if my talking sounds insane today.... Ah, sorry ig...)

ANYWAYS-!!!

ofc that I have ideas :) they cover multiple fields based on your preferences :)

If Shadow will stay a demon in your AU, then here are some:

Shadow Kurai

Shadow Kage

Shadow Kagami

Shadow Kuro

Shadow Akuma

Shadow Waru

Shadow Obake

Shadow Genso

Shadow Shinanai

Shadow Yoru

Shadow Yonaka

Shadow Fukuro

Preferably avoid Shadow Kagami bcuz Kagami is a Japanese name so im not sure if it's smart to use it as a last name, plus i think that Kagami is a girl's name tho im not sure. I suggested Kagami bcuz Kagami means "Mirror" :3

These ones above are provided by translator so i don't trust them fully, so I searched some irl last names you could use:

Shadow Aikawa

Shadow Hoshino

Shadow Igarashi

Shadow Kazama

Shadow Kuroiwa

Shadow Miyashita

Shadow Mochizuki

Again this is all if Shadow is staying a demon in your AU

If he's being a Hylian (human), here are some alternative ideas: (you could also use the above irl last names, they're still matching)

Shadow Ningen

Shadow Honmono

Shadow Ribingu

Shadow Kowarenai

Shadow Jozuna

Shadow Yoru (yeah it matches for both demon and human)

Shadow Yonaka (again)

Shadow Fukuro (once again XD)

Again, these are by a translator, not fully reliable from my personal opinion, so whether he's a Hylian or demon, irl last names match.

Also, you probably realized, these are all on Japanese (both irl and ones by a translator). Since the manga is well, manga lol, id use Japanese last names. If you're tired of Japanese or don't want to use it, here are some alternatives on different languages:

Shadow Noir (French)

Shadow Ombre (French)

Shadow Hibou (French)

Shadow Habile (French)

Shadow Noche (Spanish)

Shadow Oscuro (Spanish)

Shadow Gufo (Italian)

Shadow Diavolo (Italian)

Shadow Agma (Korean)

Shadow Eodum (Korean)

Shadow Yewan (Chinese)

These above on different languages are also by a translator, so im not sure how reliable they are. Speaking of translator, it says there is simplified and traditional Chinese so that one above is by simplified.

If you want me to do research on the alternatives of different languages, lemme know :) It would take me a while but I could do it if you want :D I definitely have many many more you could use, but these were some examples. It depends on who and what Shadow will be in your AU. Irl Japanese last names from my research are probably the most reliable and make the most sense, but these from a translator are kinda fitting too ig :3

This is probably too much lol, so here are my top choices for Japanese ones:

Demon (translator):

Shadow Kurai

Shadow Akuma

Human (translator):

Shadow Jozuna

Shadow Ningen

Irl from my research (can be both demon and human):

Shadow Mochizuki

Shadow Hoshino

Also, ik you didn't ask for it lol but wanted to share it if you need help for Vio (he's my husband gotta mention him lol)

Good choices for him from the translator would be:

Vio Murasakiiro

Vio Toshokan

Vio Chikyu

Hehe uhhh, imma stop here cuz I KNOW ill find too many for him that would only make sense in my head hahahaha, plus if I do research we're all SCREWED XDD But Vio Murasakiiro would be the best option :)

Ik you didn't ask for Vio, but if you need help for him or anyone else feel free to ask. I can either go from the translator or better do research, but for research takes time haha XD

ANYYYYWAAAYYYSSS-

Everything depends on who and what Shadow is, but I was able to cover multiple fields here. If you need help for him or anyone else, feel free to ask, i love giving characters last names if they don't canonically have those. It often takes time cuz I either go by translator or research, tho i prefer research which takes more time but I prefer it cuz it makes the characters more realistic and makes them sound like they are in fact from modern world. If you want explanation for this, ehhh... You'd have to wait for me to write an asf long essay which would take me like forever XDD

All in all, hope this helps :D 💚💜