#i picked it from her twitch icon :3

[m9ow]

𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐮𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

-that new girl interrupts you and vinnie during a make-out session for some very compelling questions

vinnie hacker x fem!reader

|part 2| masterlist for: attempts

.

background: you guys started dating a while before he joined the hype house. you both decided to keep it a secret, you thought it was none of people's business and he felt like his fans would be upset. you come over to the house regularly to see him, and when the cameras left or eyes were peeled away he'd sweep you off your feet.

but when a new member joins who quickly becomes interested in him, you have to watch a girl flirt with your boyfriend. right in front of you

he slams you against the wall as his lips move fast against yours, tongue dipping into your mouth in with the warmth of his saliva coating your lips as he grabs you tightly

all of this. is ruined by painfully loud knocks at the door.

vinnie scoffs against your lips as he lays one quick peck to keep you satisfied as he calls out that he's busy

"vinnie!" now you are scoffing as you recognize the voice, the stupid high pitch squeak of a voice that belongs to the new girl who can't help but constantly flirt with your boyfriend

you can't blame her for that, she doesn't know he's taken, but what you can blame her for is being a bitch to you and ignoring vinnies signals to leave him alone

"vinnie! let me innn!" she giggled like a little girl and you tossed your head back against the wall softly to take a deep breath, vinnie, who was just as annoyed as you, feels bad because just a second ago he was trying to make you feel special and now he's gotta go out and talk to another girl who, in his eyes, is like an annoying little sister.

"fuck, okay, just give me a second!" he grumbled and you knew your cue, you pushed your way out of vinnie's grip and made your way to the bathroom where you'd have to hide in the meantime

once he hears the door close he moves to the door, unlocking it just to almost get hit with it as it swings open, he feels arms around him as she squeals his name

before he can process she makes her way to his bed and lays out on it, he stands there shocked

"um, I was in the middle of something..is it important?" he asks with a sigh, she looks around almost in a way of looking for anything that could be more important than her, and he not so subtly opens the door wider to hint at her exit

"are you playing one of your video games or something?" she asks, clueless

"i-"

"you know I was thinking, what if we collab?"

"like with a tiktok?"

"no! silly! with your twitch!"

"oh, I didn't know you gamed.." he says, so painfully bored with this conversation as he flew on autopilot, just spewing out whatever his brain thought connected with what the conversation was saying.

"I'm the best! but..what if I was just there? in the stream to hang out!" she stands up and vinnies eyes light up at any sign of her leaving,

"yeah sure, I gotta get back to it tho" he mumbles as she leaves, slamming the door shut before locking it. he rushes into the bathroom to see you basically asleep on the counter.

"m' sorry about that" he slurs as he wraps his arms around you, kissing you sleepily

"I gotta say," you mumble as he picks you up, making his way to the bed

"I cant wait for that collab"

part 3

an: icons/header was from @cookiezitos because shawty was too lazy to search for photos!! anyway! thank you guys so much for the support with everything! I love you guys so much! mwa! 💞

taglist: @httpkoylinnn @kat-789 @madiafern@rafecameronsbadussy @lilly-is-crazy @iloveme-123 @offdjj @iparticipateinmultiplefandoms @piiiicastro

[allwaswell16]

[4 pics, 4 quotes, 4 iconic 1D fics]

Iconic Fics by...

- taggiecb -

[1]

“So, you like it when people tell you what to do?” Louis asks, more cheeky than he feels. Louis is nervous. Nervous because this is going to be a thing, or nervous because this is a thing that Louis has never done before, he doesn’t know.

“Not everyone.” Harry replies, and it’s rough, like he hasn’t spoken in days.

“Just me again?” Louis leans in, and Harry’s breath hitches.

“Yeah.” He replies, mostly whispers.

[2]

“Oh you oblivious walnut,” she says. He lifts his head to see her shaking her head with her arms crossed over her chest.

“Excuse me?” He asks.

“You truly don’t see it?” She snorts.

“See what?”

“H, I love you. And I respect your decisions, but please let me just give you a nugget of advice?” She leans in and reaches for one of his hands.

He nods, wanting her to just fix his life and be done with it.

“Take away the gay/straight/bi aspect that you think this is about. Take away you being a man, and Louis being a man, and Keith being a man. Take that all out for a second. Take yourself out of it for a moment.” She smiles at him although it looks a bit sympathetic. “I don’t think that you are bothered by the idea of two men being intimate. I think you are bothered by Louis being intimate with someone that isn’t you.”

[3]

“You didn’t have to do this.”

“I didn’t say I did, did I? It’s my honour,” Louis says. The words sound foreign on his tongue, as if he was talking to a stranger, not Harry.

A corner of Harry’s lips twitch up, picking up on Louis’ own nerves. “Honour?”

“Privilege?” Louis tries instead. Harry contemplates a bit and shakes his head, rejecting that word as well. “How about pleasure?”

“I can get on board with pleasure,” Harry says, his dimples giving away his fierce attempt not to smile. Louis doesn’t have such restraint and practically laughs and giggles his way through the rest of the song.

The song is unfamiliar to him, and it’s impossible to know how long it lasted, but it felt like a lifetime and less than a second all at the same time. As soon as the last notes play, Harry releases him and steps away. The spell is broken, but at the same time, Louis feels like something has just begun.

[4]

Moving on, Harry is moving on. He isn’t too proud a person to admit that Louis’ rejection stung. That moment at the wedding, his mother's wedding, Harry thinks with a chill running down his spine, was everything that Harry had imagined it would be. Louis was so willing and just took what Harry wanted to offer.  But that didn't seem to change anything when he looked  into Louis’ eyes and all Harry could see was disappointment.  

At least now he knows. Even if he can't have Louis now, he won't have to wonder what his skin tastes like or the look of passion on his face while Harry is inside him. He just has to now convince himself that it was enough.

He thinks he's doing an alright job of it. His main focus has always been his career. He just throws himself into his next client and tells himself that Louis Tomlinson isn't the be all end all of beautiful faces and beautiful bodies. He can most definitely move on.

Or at least that's what he thought until he saw the Daily Mail Article pop up in his news feed.

- answers below -

1. Reduce Me To A Pleading Cry (Break The Skin and Tantalize) 

As the CEO of Styles & Styles, Harry Styles cuts a brooding and handsome figure at the helm of a very successful business. His reputation for intensity is well known, but you would be intense, too, if you had to work numbers all day, give countless orders, and conduct endless meetings. When all you really want to do at night--ache to do--is give away the reins, let someone else make the decisions, be ordered around for once, just--let go. Harry has reached his breaking point when one touch from a man whose very stance commands attention leads him back to a place he thought he’d never return.

Or Harry is a broody submissive boss, Louis is a natural dom who works in the mail room at Styles & Styles, Niall is a matchmaking oracle, and a slender, dark haired man stands mute at the coffee stand encouraging others to spill their secrets.

2. Saw It In Your Eyes

Harry Styles counts himself extremely lucky that he has landed such a great roommate. It doesn’t bother him at all that his new roommate is gay. In fact, they get along so well that they have formed an extremely close friendship that takes up pretty much all his free time. When Louis starts bringing a new guy home with him, Harry is surprised by how much it bothers him. Is he not as okay as he thought he was with Louis’ sexuality?

Or the one where Harry is an oblivious walnut.

3. That's What I'm Here For

Louis Tomlinson is a dairy farmer on a tiny farm in eastern Canada. His wife of nearly thirty years has left him and his children are all grown up and out of the house. Louis needs help running his business but has no idea where to even start looking. Luckily for him his children know just the man for the job.

4. Why Can't It Be Like That

Louis Tomlinson, head of his local hospital's charity fund, suddenly finds himself in the heart of the Royal family when his mother marries the third son of the reigning monarch. Such an upset in lifestyle brings a lot of changes for Louis, one of them being the need for a stylist.

Enter Harry Styles, a cutting edge fashion stylist who loves his job and prides himself on his passion. The first time he sees Louis Tomlinson on the cover of a tabloid he wants to dress him, style him, make him as beautiful as Harry knows he could be. When he's hired to do just that, he knows this will be a perfect partnership. That is, until he actually meets the man.

A fashion AU with a royal twist, where Louis doesn't need a stylist, Harry's thrilled to have a real life Barbie doll, and they're both very wrong about each other.

[eternal-love]

Austin and Me

“Don’t tell me bye, bye”

“Wife to the ‘king’. Icon to the world, Destined for more.”

Summary: At 18 years old, she fell in love with Austin, at 20 years old, she became his wife, by 22, she was his doll. In which Cynthia’s life changed drastically after falling head over heels with a man that promised her the moon and the stars. She takes us down the memory lane of what could’ve been— the perfect marriage.

Inspired by the book: Elvis and Me by Priscilla Presley.

I do not condemn any of the portrayals I decide to do about certain people, it’s just fanfiction. And it would be divided in parts.

English isn’t my first language so I’m trying my best!

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Our daughter, Lori, was born at 1:30 that afternoon. I couldn’t believe she was mine, that I had birthed this child. She was so tiny, so beautiful. Austin came into the room and kissed me, thrilled that we had a healthy baby. He was already in life with her. He watched her in awe, her hair color, blonde as his, her blue eyes like ours. He watched us both with a twinkle in his eyes.

“We have a little girl.” He whispered to me.

“We sure do.” I whispered back with a slight chuckle.

I asked him if he wanted to hold her. He looked at me petrified, but then he started to touch her. He played with her small hands, her small feet. He was in complete awe.

“I can’t believe I made part of this beautiful child.” Austin always knew he wanted the baby to have light hair. “Even her hair color is right!”

We stayed close to each other for a while, caressing our infant and each other, we were just a young couple happy for the birth of their baby and the pleasures of parenthood.

Two days later, I got discharged from the hospital. I tried looking my best, I had teased my hair to make it even bigger, I did my ever-so-black eye makeup, I got dressed with the help of the nurses. It was a pink shift dress, I had some Pearl-colored heels. Austin wearing blue outfit, I could see the disapproval on his eyes. I had noticed quite lately that he was not on-board with my whole aesthetic.

“Is there something wrong?” I asked as I placed a golden cross necklace around my neck.

“Isn’t it too much?” He said as he fixed his blue turtleneck. “I mean the hair and makeup.”

“I’ve always looked like this.” I said, not understanding his rejection now.

“Yeah but— to get out of the hospital? Your hair is too big. You might as well put a whole bird nest on it.”

He didn’t understand how much his mocking affected me, so I just chuckled awkwardly and he didn’t even notice!

“I like it.” I said confidently, but he was making me feel self conscious.

His sister, Ashley, was there and she was taking pictures of us as we held our baby girl. I was a bit down already— he made me feel insecure. I smiled as the picture was taken, I then looked at him dearly. He sometimes did all these weird comments and then act as if nothing happened.

When we were back home, he had already gotten a cook, a maid and a nanny, which I accepted in our house dearly. But still— postpartum depression got me and no one really ever told me how bad it got. But I was still trying to keep myself together.

————————————

Maybe it was the stress or just the peer pressure of being a new father but he was up and down lately, he’d ignore me all the time or be very loving. Sometimes I just didn’t recognize him, and it hurt.

“Cyn!”

He called me into his office, he did his research for characters there. I was getting dressed, fixing my gold bracelet. I picked up the small Lori in my arms, I walked to his office “Yes?”

“Cyn, I’ve been thinking. I-I have to have time to— think. Things aren’t just going good between us. It’ll be okay if you and I took a little time off, like a trial separation. Be apart from one another for a little while.”

I wanted to kill myself, my eye twitched a little bit, I had literally our week-old baby in my arms right now. This was not the man I knew,

“What? What did I do?” I asked, it had to be a joke.

“Nothing, you did nothing wrong, baby. It’s not you. It’s just that I’m going through some things. I think it’d be better if we took a little break.”

A break? I had just given birth to our baby, a break would make me sink in more into my melancholia. But it he didn’t want me now, then he’d get so. I nodded, finding a bit of strength on being the actual mother of his child.

“You’ve got it. You just tell me when to leave.” I said as I walked out of his office. Instinctively, Austin shot up from his office chair, he knew he had fucked up big time.

“Cyn! I didn’t mean so!” He shouted from his office. I just didn’t understand him, did he want me or did he want me not? He confused me a lot and during that postpartum time, it really hurt me. He made me cry a lot.

I ignored him calling my name and went upstairs to our room. I don’t think he ever intended to leave me. It wasn’t his style. Two days had passed. The idea of a trial separation was never mentioned again. We both acted as if nothing had been said, it was during times like this when I wished both Austin and I could actually have good communication, that we’d confront our insecurities, fears and frustrations instead of pretending they weren’t there.

I could not escape the impact his words had on me, leaving me with a sense of doubt.

————————————

I often cooed Lori, she was so small, I’d talk to her softly. It was like she had sunlight in her hair, stars upon her eyes, she was perfect. On the locket Austin gave me on out first Valentine’s Day together, I placed a small picture of Lori too, so I had her and Austin near my heart.

While I was getting ready for bed, Austin cleared his throat from the doorframe.

“Can we talk, baby?” He said softly. I simply nodded as I finished combing my hair. “I’m so damn sorry bout what I said a few days ago. That wasn’t me— my thoughts and frustrations got be best of me.”

I looked at him, why was he making me so emotional? Maybe it were the hormones? I couldn’t guess but I couldn’t stay mad at those beautiful blue eyes. Especially when he unintentionally made pouty lips.

“It’s okay— I’m also very down lately. I’ve been holding myself back from snapping at anyone close to me.” I chuckled, I shouldn’t be so forgiving because that would come back to bite me.

We fell asleep together, our baby in between us, I’ve never felt this sort of loving before but that’s what happens to me. When I’m happy, I think it’ll last forever.

[yazzydream]

JJK Season 2 Episode Predictions

Manga SPOILERS for season 2. Just having fun making predictions for what chapters the episodes will cover. It's been rumored that s2 will have 23 episodes on twitter. No official source yet but it's probably from the next issue of Jump.

Season 1 ended with chapter 63. So, starting off with chapter 64!

1. Ch 64 - A super cute episode covering Ozawa's crush on Yuji. It'll be a nice nostalgic episode establishing of a better time before all our hearts are ripped to shreds later.

Hidden Inventory/Gojo's Past arc

2. Ch 65-67 - Official start of Hidden Inventory/Gojo's Past arc. Ends with the revelation of Riko's bounty.

3. Ch 68-70 - Starts with Toji explaining his plans. Satoru and Suguru deal with the bounty hunters attacking Riko's school. Kuroi gets kidnapped... which was a non-issue, so... Okinawa! Ends with Satoru getting stabbed in the back after returning to the school. Man, I can't believe these animators would be so cruel to end the episode on such a cliffhanger, amirite?

4. Ch 71-73 - Starts with that great Toji flashback.

Just an overall high tension, tragic episode where Toji fucks up all the kids. Ends with him remembering who Megumi is. Lol.

5. 74-75 - I'd start with a scene where Toji is walking away from Suguru and cutting to Satoru's finger twitch that was shown at the end of ch 73 first. Then back to Toji, who drops off Riko's corpse. And we get the iconic battle, round II, Satoru v. Toji.

6. 76-77 - Suguru finds Satoru with Riko's body at the Time Vessal Association. The year of Suguru's downward spiral. Ends on the massacre report.

7. 78-79 - Satoru is shook. The big breakup. Satoru meeting Megumi. Satoru wakes up in the present to the first years.

Post-credits scene where the first years go find Mechamaru. Episode properly ends with Geto and Mahito approaching him.

----

Notes: I can't believe I thought Gojo's past arc would initially only take like 3-4 episodes. It's definitely closer to 5-6 now that I've typed this all up. lol. 16 episodes left now.

Shibuya Incident arc

8. Ch 79-82 - Picking up where we left off, with Mahito and Kenjaku discussing their deal with Kokichi/Mechamaru. Whole episode is just dedicated to the Mechamaru fight. Ends on this ominous scene:

9. Ch 83-85 - Welp, here's Shibuya Incident arc. Begins with incident report lessgoooo. I love this narrative framing device in JJK tbh.

Introducing our allies and antagonists. The absolute massacre that starts in Shibuya station once Satoru is confronted with the disaster curses. Ends partway through ch 85; with Satoru exorcising Hanami.

10. Ch 85-89 - An auxiliary manager explains how the curtain around Shibuya station works. Yuji v. Grasshopper Curse, I expect would be relatively short? Ends with the train packed with transfigured humans coming into the station and Satoru casting Domain. Satoru is exhausted, and then the episode ends with:

11. Ch 90-91 - Opens with the flashback of Kenjaku explaining his plan to the curses. Kenjaku reveals himself to Satoru. Portable Mechamaru appearing on Yuji's ear. Satoru... getting sealed in the Prison Realm. Omg, it's here. Ends with Satoru having "faith in everyone." 😭 Goodbye for at least another season, bby.

12. Ch 92-95 - 9:22PM Allies meeting, concerned that it's been a while since Satoru's gone in. Yuji tells all about the sealing. Ino, Megumi, and Yuji team up. Ep ends with the knowledge that Ogami, that weird grandma, is trying to resurrect Toji.

13. Ch 96-99 - Begins with the curse users' backstory; Satoru's birth. Yuji et al. fight against them. Toji resurrected. Begin Nobara v. Shigemo fight. Episode ends in affirmation of Nobara being a badass and telling Akari to hide; so it's only partway through ch 99.

14. Ch 99-102 - Continue Nobara v. Shigemo. Nanami joins in and wrecks Shigemo's shit. Mei Mei & Ui Ui v. Smallpox Curse. Choso v. Yuji begins ahhh. Ends when Mei Mei wins her fight and Kenjaku comes to compliments her.

15. Ch 103-106 Choso v. Yuji continues. Choso has the memory that never was. End with Mimiko and Nanako finding Yuji; partway through ch 106.

16. Ch 106-109 - Starting partway through ch 106; 10:20PM Naobita, Maki, and Nanami v. Dagon. Megumi to the rescue! Ends with the gang trying to escape Dagon's Domain, only for Toji to pop up like a daisy.

17. Ch 110-112 - Toji kicks Dagon's ass. Megumi separates from the others and the Naobita, Maki, and Nanami face Jogo. Mimiko, Nanako, and Jogo all feed Yuji fingers. Sukuna kills the twins. Ends with Jogo terrified; partway through ch 112.

18. Ch 112-116 - Continuing right where 112 left off; Sukuna asking what Jogo wants. Toji v. Megumi fight. Kusakabe and Panda face Suguru's curse users before they're rudely interrupted by Sukuna v. Jogo. Sukuna and Uraume reunite. Ends with Shigemo freaking out about something Megumi did.

19. Ch 117-121 - An absolutely somber as shit episode. Starts at 11:05PM Shigemo v. Megumi where Megumi initiates Mahoraga. Sukuna summons Domain and destroys Shibuya. Yuji finally regains consciousness and is devastated. Nanami is killed by Mahito, and the episode ends on Yuji's facial reaction.

20. Ch 121-124 - Start off right at that last page on ch 121; Yuji is furious. Mahito v. Yuji. Mahito v. Nobara. It's like "Accomplices" part 2. But then Mahito touches Nobara's face; partway through ch 124.

21. Ch 124-128 - Starts partway through ch 124; Nobara's childhood flashback, adult Saori, the first years hanging out, etc., etc. Mahito beats up a shocked Yuji. Todo and Aarata show up and Todo tells Yuji to get up, which where I imagine the first half of the ep to end.

The Kyoto school are on the train, where the last remnants of Mechamaru talks to Miwa. Yuji and Todo v. Mahito. Episode ends partway through ch 128 where they've "brought out 120% of their potential."

22. Ch 128-132 - Cont. right where we left off ch 128. My absolute favorite sequence where Yuji chases Mahito through the metaphorical snow drift. Can't wait to see this animated.

Episode ends on Kenjaku appearing and offering to save Mahito.

23. Ch 133-136 - Starts with catching up on what everyone was up to until this point. Kenjaku bloodies Yuji up a bit and consumes Mahito. Everyone shows up and teams up against Kenjaku. Including Choso! Then Yuki! Episode/season ends with Kenjaku bouncing with the Prison Realm.

Wow, what a foreboding and depressing end to the season. lmao.

It'll be fun to see how accurate or completely off base I was with how I divided the chapters. Just about 2 weeks left!

[thetheatermst]

Fuck’s High School Pt. 3

Back into the fray, not one of the three looked at all happy to be back in their seats. Twenty-three chapters done, and they were only just past the halfway point. All three of them saw it as the bad sign that it was, and it affected their mood accordingly.

“I really don’t wanna do this,” Cherry groaned, nearly knocking her popcorn onto the floor as she slumped against Asahi. “This story is so bad. I just… I don’t wanna have to read any more of it.”

Asahi shrugged her off, causing more of her popcorn to spill onto the already messy floor. “Then go. The door is that way.”

“Yeah… but the money.”

Briar hummed, one hand on her lap, the other picking at the damage she had done to her seat. “The coin does make it hard to walk away,” she agreed.

Groaning, Asahi sank deep into his seat as he slouched. “Yeah… yeah. The money does make this a little more tolerable,” he reluctantly agreed. “Though we better be getting paid a substantial amount for this one. Who knows how much time and energy we’ve already wasted on TwilightRova, the least our generous host could do is to properly compensate us.”

“I’m gonna use the money to treat me an’ my friends to steak,” Cherry declared. “An' not just your run of the mill steak. I’m gonna go fancy and hit the fifty-dollar steaks. Because I deserve it after this. Expensive steak, savory aju sauce, great drinks, delicious sides, and a lava cake to top it all off.”

“Stop,” Asahi murmured, shaking his head. “You’re making me hungry for steak, now.”

Chuckling, Briar moved her hand from the plastic-foam carnage to join it with her other hand on her lap. “I won’t be getting steaks, but I do think with the coin I’ve earned, I’ll do some much needed improvements on my equipment. Perhaps I will spoil myself and enjoy a night in a more expensive tavern with some fine wine.”

Pushing at the both of them, Asahi turned to fix his glare on the screen. “Yeah, yeah. Keep dreaming about what you would do, but if you want the money, we need to get through the rest of this shitshow.”

As he said that, the lights began to dim, the telltale sign of the story about to resume, and moments later the screen flickered to life.

chapter 24 the new villain

Asahi’s eye was twitching, and he slowly made a helpless and furious gesture to the screen. “You’re adding a new villain?” he demanded, speaking slow and careful. “A new villain? When Swansin is already running free? You can’t do that, no villain you add will ever measure up to her crimes.”

AN: I did some artwurk for rebecca enjoi it! tel me wat u think abut it!

“Well, I suppose we should be thankful that the artwork was not included,” Briar said, crossing her arms over her chest as she said that. “I know nothing of your art skill, but the mental images alone have been enough torment, I would rather not have physical evidence.”

I got the estate which I looked at. It was a freaking beautiful shade of blue which reminded me of a cloudless summers day [AN: REBECCA IS SMART SHE READ SHAKESPEARE].

“A cloudless summer’s day has nothin’ to do with someone’s intelligence,” Cherry countered, rolling her eyes. “Anyone, literally anyone can relate a shade of blue to a type of weather. She ain’t special.”

Asahi opened his mouth and hesitated a moment before shaking his head. “Is she trying to reference Sonnet 18? Cause if she did, she didn’t even do it right,” he grimaced. “Look, Shakespeare isn’t my main read, but I respect the guy and his work, and he does not deserve it to be slandered in this.”

“What’s Sonnet 18?” Briar asked.

To that, he shrugged. “It’s sorta famous, at least where I’m from, by an equally famous poet. Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? It’s a pretty iconic romantic poem.”

 I smiled on the side contordedly. I stood agast because the sight was so great to see!

Turning from Asahi, Briar had a slight grimace on her features, “I don’t think ‘aghast’ is the word you’re looking for,” she said, then paused. “Unless you truly are horrified by the house. Then maybe it’ll work.”

“The house is anti-environmental, so she is beyond aghast,” Cherry added.

 The walls of the estate were red because the Collins love blood and really tall to ward off Mexicans.

“Racism,” Asahi said with a frown. “Of course.”

“Nevermind that, didn’t she just say the house was a ‘beautiful shade of blue’ earlier?” Cherry demanded. “How did it turn red—did they bathe it in blood when we weren’t lookin’?”

“Honestly? I can see that happening.”

Finally we entered the compownd through the gates and we saw the house. It was at least 10 times bigger than my own house (before it burned down). I felt a ping of sadness growing expectantly in my heart from the void where I lost my house. But I had to go on and do good things to make up for my past sins.

“At least you’re trying to do good, I suppose,” Briar said with great reluctance. “It’s better than nothing.”

Asahi shook his head, sinking deeper into his seat as he angrily sipped through the not-environmentally-friendly straw of his drink. “Trust me. That ‘I must do good things’ bit will stop the moment Swan shows up.”

I saw a homeless person on my right as we enterd. Determined to do good I have him money so that he could start a new life. It was a lot of money. Trust me.

Cherry gave a soft huff, “Thought their house was s’possed to be secluded,” she muttered. “Ya know? Give them privacy to be who they are away from pryin’ eyes. So why’s a homeless dude just hanging around?”

“Probably isn’t a random hobo, likely just Jasper, cause she hates him almost as much as she hates Bella,” Briar countered.

 Anyways then we went into the hose but then we went right back out to see Edowerd's gazeebo.

"This is the Gazebo" edowrd said pointing at the gazebo.

“And this is the Department of Redundancy Department,” Asahi retorted.

It was a huge gazeebo outside near the beyutiful flowers. It was cloudy and sunny through the parts of the sky that weren't cloudy.

“Is it cloudy or not?” Cherry demanded, “Ya can’t say it’s cloudy and sunny! Those are two different types of weather!”

A single beam of light appeard and glinted down on me. It was simbolic of me being a gud person deep down [AN: STOP HATING ON REBEKA SHES NOT A BAD PURSON SHES ACSHUALLY MISUNDERSTUD!].

“No, no,” Briar shook her head. “She is not a good person. Good people don’t just abuse and kill others because they want to. There is no ‘misunderstanding’ going on. Your character openly abuses and harms others, and kills when death is not necessary. Those are not traits of a good person.”

Asahi shrugged, rolling his eyes “That beam of light is just God focusing in on her so that he doesn’t miss when he brings out the meteor.”

"It is a nice Gazebo!" I said happily but falsely. What edowerd didn't know is that I was starting to forgive him for his trespasses against me.

Cherry let out a muffled scream. “Edward did nothin’ wrong!”

Then we went inside the gazebo. It had beautiful Roman and Greek arcitecture

She let out another muffled scream. “No! No, no, no!” Cherry yelled, jumping to her feet and making an X with her arms. “We are not bringing back in the Greco-Roman gods in this. This ain’t gonna be a Harry’s Destiny twist!”

which assured me of the Collin's wealth.

Slowly tugging Cherry back into her seat, Briar raised a brow to the screen. “I just noticed, but she likes to use the word ‘assured’ a lot.”

“Huh,” Asahi hummed. “Now that you mention it, it is overused. Also, why the hell does it matter to her if the Cullen’s are wealthy?”

“The greed of humans.”

"Now let's see the house" Alicica said. We walked past the drug lab were Alicia made her gods when she wasn't at school.

Sighing, Cherry gave up and collapsed back in her seat. “Sure, why struggle to find God when ya can just make one in your basement?” she asked. “Sounds legit.”

Ever since she invented a cure for aids she was richer than anyone could ever imagine.

“She cured AIDS, huh?” Asahi asked, crossing his arms over his chest and raising an eyebrow. “That’s a good thing, actually. I’m glad. Though knowing Americans, she’s probably overcharging it by a substantial amount, like they do for EpiPens.”

“They overcharge for medical necessities?” Briar asked.

Cherry nodded her head. “Yup, America; land of ‘make the rich richer and the poor poorer’. Something that makes like twenty bucks to make gets charged two-hundred, and that’s if you’re lucky.”

“Here, something like insulin costs a little under two thousand yen—that’s like about fifteen dollars. America charges ninety dollars—if you’re lucky, as Bolton put it,” Asahi explained to the Huntsman.

“Some people pay upward to a thousand monthly for it,” Cherry added.

Briar frowned, her tightening mouth twisting into something of clear displeasure. “That’s… that shouldn’t be right,” she said slowly, uncertainly, looking around questioningly. “How is that okay?”

“Because America likes to fill the pockets of the rich an’ say fuck you to middle an’ lower class citizens.”

 We went inside the Collins hose. It was HUGE. It had a TV and a kitchen and a table and everything.

“As opposed to the houses that don’t got tables an’ kitchens,” Cherry snarked.

Then Alice took me up to her bedroom and gave me new clothes as she prepared her rum for having 2 people.

“Except that she shares her room with your favorite Hale; her boyfriend-slash-husband,” Asahi corrected with a frown. “So, really, we’re looking at her preparing her room for three people to share.”

 Edowerd and jakub couldn't cum up because their boys and boys shouldn't be in girls rums [AN: you here that you sickos].

“But Jasper, her mate, is an exception,” Briar drawled. “Does she not understand that married couples share beds?”

 Anyways Alicia gave me a pink turtleneck with sleeves to the hands and a red catholic schoolgirl miniskirt and black pantyhose. It looked so god with my purple raven hare with golden streaks.

“Why’s she always got to keep talking about her hare?” Cherry asked, “We get it, ya got a pet, shut up about it.”

“I feel bad for it,” Asahi murmured. “She’s dyed it’s fur and then painted gold streaks through it. I doubt the dye is even safe for animal use.

Tanishashanqua also equips something like that she had a white dress shirt with blue kaki jeans with shoes. Alicia stilt kept on her drug dealer uniform. After that we all made fiendship bracelets so that we would know that we would never abandoned one another ever agin.

Briar sighed, “Give it a few chapters, you’ll be at each other’s throats in no time.”

"Yo homie this shit be gold" tanishashanqua seed happily.

"Okay guys let's see the rest of the house" I said. If it weren't for me reminding everyone of everything we would never get places on time.

“Actin’ like your friends are dumb, that ain’t a ‘good person’ thing,” Cherry said, making another mental tally of how many ‘not good people things’ the so called ‘good person’ Rebecca did. “Plus, it ain’t your house. If Alice wants to keep hanging out here, then you keep hanging out here.”

Then Alice showed us the Bathroom on the basement floor. There was also a winery and a gym and a basketball curt.

“Their basement is sizable,” Briar commented. “Does it also have a dungeon?”

“Probably. But right now ya can get drunk outta your mind, an’ then play some hoops!”

Then on the middle basement floor there was a secret passage to the Armory. Then Alice showed us the dungeon.

“Yep, there’s the dungeon,” Asahi nodded, “Not just a dungeon, but also an armory. This is just… ridiculous levels of design.”

"Guys don't let Esme know that I showed you this" Alice said qualitly. We all shook our heads in assumption so she would know that we wouldn't betray.

“Ah, yes, showing your friends things your mom doesn’t want you showing them,” Asahi sighed, “Shouldn’t she have known if they would betray her or not? She has future vision.”

“Does she though?” Cherry asked. “There’s not been one mention of any of their powers.”

“Fuck, you’re right.”

Then we saw the videoguming rum. It was nice and big. Then I saw EDowerd's piano. Rossey's room had lots of guns and ammo and grenades. Alicia's room had lots of pink.

“You know ya coulda used the wiki to know what their house looked like, right?” Cherry asked.

"This doth be Emmets Roometh" Edowerd sed as we entered Emmet's rum. It was dark with pink stripes. Emmet was listening to Lady Gage's "Born this way". I would have moshed with him to the music but only fucking stupid Goths and emo shits mosh. So instead we all danced normally.

“Ah, insulting goths and emos. Still proving that you’re not a good person,” Asahi shook his head. “Anyone can mosh, it’s not just for them.”

 But suddenly there was a HUGE FUCKING NOISE from the front of the house!

"OPEN UP MOTHERFUCKERS" said the door!

“’How about we don’t!’ the wall retorted.” Cherry replied with a high pitched tone.

"SHIT! THE COPS!" Alicia said as she got her gun out.

"No wait let me talk to them" Jacobo said. Then he took off his shirt and opened the door. There were two more cops.

“Because a shirtless fifteen-year-old is a surefire way to get rid of cops,” Asahi rolled his eyes.

"Hello Rebecca. We are here to say sorry. We couldn't find Chadley's murderer. We thought that there might be evidence in the murder sene but now the Murder Scene has been burned down! Do you know who did it?" They asked.

“The culprit for both is Swansin.”

 Jakub nodded towards me. I remember that before he said it was okay to do bad things but only if they were for good reasons. So I lied.

"It was esme." I said. Edowerd and Tanishashanqua and Alicia and Jacob all nodded chalantly.

“You know,” Briar began, “I don’t quite understand why Esme is getting such hate. It’s nothing compared to the hate Bella gets, but Esme was a genuinely nice person in canon for the most part.”

“The author doesn’t care, she needs her punchin’ bags,” Cherry replied.

"Bitch please" Someone who looked like Esme said

“But only ‘looked’ like her,” Asahi added. “It’s clearly, totally not the real matriarch of the family, just a doppleganger.”

 as she went into the room. Then she took out a knife and stabbed the two cops and then ate them. It was... ESME!

Cherry rolled her eyes, “So, the chick who looked like Esme and ate the cops really was Esme. Shocker.”

Esme was standing there all eviliy and everything. She was dressed in a business women's suit and was easily taller than jakub. She had a black dress on too.

“Is she wearing a dress or a business suit?” Asahi asked, squinting at the screen.

“She could be wearing the dress over the suit,” came the Huntsman’s answer, though equally uncertain and confused.

She had dark golden hair which went down to her back and also had leopard highlights. Her front tooth was missing but we didn't bring it up. Not even Rosalie because even Rosalie was afrade of that mega fuckking egotistical biotch Esme.

“Seriously, though,” Cherry yelled, raising her hands to the air, “What did Esme do? She’s nice!”

"By the way you bitches all need to go back to school tommorrow." Esme sed.

“That’s why she’s evil,” Briar nodded. “Forcing them to go to school.”

"What!? Why!?" Alice asked

"Shit's fucked up yo. People be dead and shit." Tanishashanqua sed.

“And who’s fault is that?” Asahi asked, frowning. “Who started fights and killing sprees in the school? Who is responsible for every ounce of bullshit that’s happened?” He paused, waited a few seconds, and clapped his hands together. “That’s right! Swansin and co!”

"Too bad you bitches. I'm the new prinsipul and I say that school goes back tomorrow. And I hired new teechors too." She sed, pointing at ME! "ALL TO GET YOU, REBECCA! MY ENEMY! I WILL KILL YOU BEFORE THE WEEK ENDS!" she warned super evily.

“Are we ever going to learn why people want to kill Swansin? Of course, not,” Asahi said and shook his head.

Briar shrugged, “I know full well why I wish to kill her,” she said. “But for the others? Likely for revenge for all the horrible things she has done and will do.”

"FUCK YOU BITCH" I sed. I almost attacked her with my katana but I stopped myself because we wuld need Rosalie to take down Esme and this wasn't a good time.

“Also; Esme is a vampire and will fuck you up,” Cherry reminded.

"HAHAHA! YOU WISH BITCH!" she said! "BY THE WAY I HAVE HIRD THE VULTURE TO TEACH CLASSES!" she screamed! Then she jumped out the window and left!

Sighing, Briar massaged the bridge of her nose. “…Yes, because Volturi would have happily stopped their own, very important work as the strongest, and largest coven charged with keeping vampires secret from society, and leave all that behind to teach a high school in a small, rainy town.”

“It makes no sense,” Asahi groaned.

"Who the fuck are the vulture" Jakub.

“Vultures are a type of bird that eat carcasses,” Cherry said. “Come on, dude, everyone knows what vultures are.”

 I knew the answer becausemy friend Claritee had gotten away from them as a kid. But i deicded to let Edowerd have a moment of intelligence before he acted like a stupid fucking bitch again.

“Back to insulting Edward,” Asahi said rolling his eyes. “You really are collecting those ‘nice girl’ points.”

"They are the vampiores who have superpowers" Edowerd send as he came.

“Every vampire has a power,” Briar said, and then shook her head, “No, as Cherry already said, the Cullen’s don’t. There’s been no mention of Edward reading minds or Alice seeing the future. Because that’d just make too much sense.”

 He was now in the room. "Do not worry Rebecca weeth caneth defeateth them." He salon said cleanly.

Then Jakub left but tanishashanqua didn't because she was sleeping over with us too. I deeply but silently wondered just what that fucking bitch esme meant when she said that she would kill me.

“She means she will kill you,” Asahi answered. “It’s not that deep.”

 But then i stopped thinking

Snorting, Chery sank in her seat and smirked, “As if you ever had a coherent thought to begin with.”

and went to bed for the night.

chapter 25 - Religin class

“Oh, joy,” Briar shook her head. “Religion. Not a good sign.”

Today it was tiem to go to scool unce agin. I got out my new bead in alicias rum. I luked out the window were I saw that it was snowing outsied. Wich was werd because normally in furks it doesnt snow onlee rain.

I mean I caem to furks for the rain in the first place so why the fuock didn't it rain more often.

“Not a fan of rain myself, makes it harder to skate around,” Cherry said with a shrug. “I like it sunny and dry.”

“Agreed. Rain can be tedious, makes for harder work,” Briar nodded.

I shuke my hand at Judah in the sky before gettin dresed in my new outfit for scool. I equipd my anti raep catana and my shotgun in case I had to kil esme or jessie or vitorio or james.

“At least Meowth is safe,” Asahi shrugged.

Wen I got to the dur with Tanishashanqua and alice I saw edowerd and Jacob. Even tho it was snowing jakub didn't hav a shirt on so I got to see his fucking sexy hot indian abs. Judah fucking dammit I wanted to do him right here but it was fucking cold out so I didnt.

Briar raised a brow, “And not because of your supposed vow of abstinence?”

"hi jakub" I sed to him sexily as I culd.

"hi Rebecca. You luk good today." He told me. then Jakub caem.

“Gross,” Asahi said, grimacing while Cherry made retching noises.

We then huged in front of everyune. He was so warm so I hung on ti hum as he ran to scool. Becuz hes a werewolf he has super speed he can just taek me places. Alicia and edowerd and tansishanqua had to taek the car tho but it was oaky they sped along the road next to us. I waved to Alicia as she drove.

“Vampires have superspeed, too. Or did you just forget all the vampires having any power besides immortality and blood-drinking?” Briar asked.

Rolling his eyes, Asahi leaned back into his seat, “I think we’ve established that she did.”

Jakub droped me on the ice wen we got to scool. Hes a werewolf so he goes to scool in an indian restarant.

Still leaning back, he raised an eyebrow. “I think that Black going to school on the reservation has more to do with him being Native American and, you know, living on the reservation than it does with him being a werewolf,” he pointed out, then paused to think it over. “Though, I suppose that begs the question of why you keep bringing the pack into Fuck’s High when you said yourself that they go to school at a restaurant.”

“Oh, man,” Cherry said with something of a groan and a laugh, “I actually forgot she said they go to school at a freakin’ restaurant.”

 He left but onlee after litly kissing me goodbi. Wen I luked up he was gone. I frowned. Then I saw edowerd Alicia and Tanishashanqua all cum over together. Claritee was there too.

Briar blinked and leaned forward just slightly in her seat, “Huh,” she said after a slight pause. “I truly did not expect to see her again.”

"yo homie wats that" Tanishashanqua sed as she ponted her ring finger over at the scool bilding. The building was still smoky and brokin from when cops jumprfd though the windows and shot at everything.

“Really?” Cherry asked, gesticulating at the screen, “They couldn’t clean the school up first before makin’ everyone go back?”

“The smoke and glass shards adds enrichment,” Asahi deadpanned.

There was stil blud on some of the walls and edowerd and Alicia started getting off on it. Tasnishashanqua and me both thought it was fucking weird.

“I do hate agreeing with her, but it is really fucking weird,” Briar conceded with a face of disgust.

 Then Edowerd and me both luked shrewdlee at wat was happening. First there was a bunch of new students. One of them was a gai the other one was a gurl. both of them were obviuslee new. They were walking right towards us at fast speds.

“If we’re lucky then they’ll run her over and she’ll be dead,” Asahi said and tilted his head to the side and then back again with a sigh. “But, we’re not lucky.”

"hi my names Rebecca whtas yours" I asked the boy.

“The girl isn’t important,” Briar drawled.

The boy was a mega ultra fucking hottie but I didn't get to see his abes so I didn't no if he was actualee hotter han jakub.

“I’m really hoping that the author’s a teen,” Cherry said with a shudder, “Cause I dunno about y’all, but the way she keeps sexualizing everyone makes me really uncomfortable. Like these are high schoolers, my age range, and if she’s not a teen then having an adult talk on an’ on about how hot Jacob is, is just…”

She made a retching gesture.

 He was realy pail but not like that foucking sick transecual caspor.

Taking in a deep breath, Briar closed her eyes and tilted her head back. “We’re back to this bullshit. Great.”

 He also had gorjus blue lipstick on. He was angry then shoked and finaly calm as he spuked up.

"I am zAlec" he sed. "this is my sistor she is Kane" he sed waving his arms arund at his sister. She was just liek him onlee with bubs and a vajayjay and no you-know-what.

“Well, Zalec is an interesting thing to name your child,” Asahi frowned. “But… it has a strange sort of charm to.”

She had a pink corset on with a matching dress. she luked like mary antwonet except without the wig and without looking ugly.

“I’m sure she’s very beautiful,” Cherry countered with a huff.

"well okay that's niec" I sed as edowerd tasniahsshanqua Alicia and me all went to religion class wich was the first class of the dayu. But then Zalec caem too becuz it turned out that he was aslo in the clas with us.

“Run, Zalec, run, while you still can,” Asahi warned.

 We weer going to religion class which was taught by Carliel who is a paster of the romin orthodoks crutch.

“Of course, because Carlisle would willingly give up a very lucrative and noble job as a doctor to become a pastor and teacher,” Briar said, shaking her head. “At least Rosalie is bringing in enough money to support a family of seven.”

“Not to mention that she has the wrong church. He’s from the Angelican church, not the Orthodox,” Asahi complained, running a hand down his face. “They’re two different churches.”

Claritee kept looking at Alec the entire time and nobuddy paid any attenshin to that hag Jane.

"hello I am fathor carlye and this is religion class" sed carlyse the fucking gorjus fathor of the collins. Calisle was even older than edowerd and alicai combined wich was really fuocking old.

“Fun fact,” Cherry said, clapping her hands together with a stiff smile. “Jasper is technically the second oldest of the Cullens. While Carlisle turned back in the 1600’s, Jasper became a vampire in the 1860’s. While your precious Edward didn’t become a vampire until the early 1900’s.” She paused for a moment to let that knowledge sink in. “So this was all long after the ‘doth’ and ‘thy’s went outta fashion!”

“As if she cares,” Asahi grumbled.

 Im not sure why but he didn't have an aksent and instead just spouke ina normal fucking sexy british accent. He also was pail. Wen calyse found god he become a fathor to spred the wurd of jesus crist to everybody.

 Normily scool wuldnt allows him to teech becuz of the amendment but becuz hes esmes husbando he can teech religion now.

Groaning, Asahi buried his face in his hands. “Religion classes and religious teachings are two different things,” he hissed between clenched teeth. “A religion class teaches you about religion, when different religions were founded, what society was like, how it was treated. Etcetera, etcetera. Religion class is supposed to be an unbiased, academical point of view on numerous religions.”

“There should be no problem with him teaching religion, so long as he’s objective about it and does not try to convert students,” Briar added.

 I thught this was fuocking STUPID BECUZ RELIGION SHOULD BE FREE and I wantd to follo Judah and not the propped up fals god befor me.

“I’m still tryin’ to figure out if Judah is supposed to be God for Judaism, or some new fictional god for the story,” Cherry muttered as she tugged on a pigtail.

 "Here verybudy taek a free bibul for class" he sed.

"NO FUOCK YOU YOU MOTHERFUOCKER" I SCREEMD as I tuk my anti raep catana and cut the bibul in haf. Then Carlyle gaev me a new bibul becuz he sed the lord had spaers so wen calyse told us to use the bibles I said no and riped mine in half and chuckd it out the window.

“Destruction of a religious text, another point for Swansin’s ‘I’m a wonderful person’ tally,” Asahi said with a roll of his eyes.

Briar sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Is the inability to accept multiple gods this horrible?” she asked. “I follow the Grand Hunter, but I have no issue with those who worship any other god.”

"who can explain this verse" he asked politly. Then he pickd on Tanishashanqua becuz hes a rasist. "tell me tasnishashanqua why guns cant make noise in this verse" he pointed at the sun and got down and prayd as he asked the question.

“What does her race have to do with her being asked to read from the book?” Briar asked, moving her hand from her face, and then looked around in more confusion, “And what do guns have to do with it?”

“I’d say nothing at all…” Asahi began, sinking into his seat. “But it’s America. They would marry a gun if they could.”

Cherry shrugged, “Pretty sure half our government wants to.”

"gun cant sound motherfucker" Tanishashanqua began. "but neither can peace." She finished.

Leaning forward, Cherry wiped a fake tear away, “So beautiful.”

THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN A NEW TEECHOR CAEM TO THE CLASS….. IT WAS ARROW!

“Is it Red Arrow or Green Arrow?” Asahi asked, crossing his arms over his chest. “It’s very important, and the answer will affect my mood going forward.”

“As if your mood isn’t already sour as lemon drops,” Cherry snickered.

Chapter 25 - the betrayal

“All right,” Briar nodded, crossing her legs, and playing with her dagger. “Who, this chapter, admits they would like to sleep with Rebecca and gets called a rapist scumbag for it? Who does she manipulate into making a sexual advance on her only to demonize them for following through?”

“My bet is on Black,” Asahi said.

IT WAS ARROW! Arrow was a new teecher here at furks high ever sinc eseme becaem the new scool psinsipul becuz i had the kil the old one becuz he wuz evil and a vampior slayar.

“He didn’t even do anything wrong,” Cherry complained. “Ya broke into his office, then killed him when he demanded to know why!”

“He was also bald, which meant he was evil,” Asahi corrected.

But then i stoped and luked out the window away from hi mand carlisle becuz i thought i saw something in the grass outsied. But it was just a boyd.

“A… boyd? A body?” Briar asked. “You saw a body outside?”

“Probably one of her victims,” Cherry said through a handful of popcorn.

Watever then i luked back and arrow had ogtten up n the table wich fathor carlisle was supposed to be on. He kickd all the bibuls off becuz he realizes that criteenity is fuocking stupid and that judah is the way to go i hopped.

Sighing, Asahi massaged his temples. “Look, I am not a religious person. I lean more towards atheism and agnosticism most days. But even if I’m not a devout believer, I don’t treat others like shit because they are,” he said, and gestured to the screen. “What Swansin is doing is being a jerk. As per usual.”

"what the fuck is he doing motherfuocker" tanishahsnqua asked me. Then clarity cum to us and told us something.

"im not sure but hes the new lootenant of the scool polise" she sed.

Lowering his arm, Asahi frowned and looked over to Cherry. “Do American schools actually have police in them?” he asked, bewildered as fuck.

Cherry just shrugged. “We have resource officers, who are technically cops, but for the most part useless and just around to make sure you don’t got weed in your locker and nothing else.”

 I noded caerfuly. Clarity had fund out about my secret lately. She new that i kiled chadley but she also new that i didnt really meen it and that he understood me and that i was atoneing for my actions now.

“Your idea of atonement is questionable,” Briar muttered. “And how did you not ‘mean it’? You went in there very intent on killing Charlie. Over a key.”

i luked into her cristel like eys and new that i had a feind forever with her.

"WHAT THE FUOCK" cristal shouted when she saw arro who is a meember of the vulture.

“Don’t scream, ya idiot!” Cherry shouted, “That’ll get his attention!”

 The vulture killed her parents when she was yung. Now she is a vampire becuz of them. I wuld fele bad but clarity just wont get over it so wtf am i suposed to say to someone whos complaing abut their deed parents for the millinth time for yeers.

Sighing, Asahi dragged a hand down his face. “Yeah, because being a good friend means being resentful towards someone for their trauma of having their parent murdered. You are certainly winning as the biggest douche in the universe.”

“Ya don’t just get over your parents being murdered! You don’t just get over bein’ forcibly turned into a vampire!” Cherry yelled. “How are you such a nightmare?”

 I meen my parents lucked me in a basement for yeers but u dont see me telling peepul.

“I see we can check off her ‘trauma filled background’.” Briar said, miming a checkmark.

Anyways arrow opene his muth and out caem words.

"I AM HEER TO ANUNCE THAT dERE WILL BE A DANSE THIS CUMING FRIDAY NITE AND UR ALL INVITED!" arrow sed from the ceeling wich he had climbed up to sins hes a volture!

“Weird flex, but okay,” Cherry muttered.

"BUT IF U DUNT CUM ULL FAIL RELIGION!" he sed evilly! "AND IF U DONT HAV A DAET U CANT CUM EETHER! AHAHAHAHA!" He sed before he turend into a bat and left the classrum.

“For the group in charge of making sure vampires remain secret… they are doing awful at keeping their vampirism a secret,” Briar pointed out.

“What’s worse is we’re required to attend school dances, now! The horror!” Cherry complained.

Then class was over becuz father calisly had to give bat the chase becuz it actualee was arrow. Clarity Edoward Alicai Tanishashanqua Salec me and the hag Jane all waked down the hals togethur.

Asahi frowned, “Is she the new Swan? Because I feel sorry for her already.”

"hey rebeca hu won the elecshin" asked alicai. "i voted for u even tho rosalies my sis dont tell her or ill fuck u up" she sed quietlee. I noded my hed.

Briar held out her hands, her face aghast with horror, “What have you done, Alicia?” she demanded. “You’ve doomed us all!”

"um i no" sed Alex hu was a quite small boy hu was beyutiful. "it wil be anunced at the danse" he sed

"how do you no that" tanishashanqua sed

"arrow is... MY FATHOR!" he reveeled and then grabed that fuocking bitch ane's arm and ran down the hal.

“Yes,” Cherry nodded, “but actually no.”

“I suppose if he turned the twins into vampires, he could be considered their father,” Asahi allowed. “But, he’s technically not their father, not in the same way the Cullen family works.”

But when he was running jane let go and aciduntly steped in rosey's peth wich rosey didn't liek. But rossey thinks shes go grate she let hur of with a warning.

"bitch dunt do that agin" she sed and dicked her gun.

Asahi winced, “That sounds… very uncomfortable.”

"wtf rebecca u hav a posse now u miseryabull cunt" i luked it and it was bella hu luked haf emo and haf skanc. She had white fishnte stalkings and a black waste belt and upsieddown hipster glaosses. She had a blacke and gray flannel top on too wich was why she was so emo.

“No, Bella,” Cherry begged, watching with worry, “No, you don’t wanna be here. Get out, please!”

 Then al of a suden ALEC CAEM BACK!

"wtf do u want ho" i asked but then remebered to be gud to repeent "im sorry, i mean wat is it". Claritee and alicai saw how hurd it was for me to be niace to that fuocking biotch so they smieled at me.

The group blinked, taking the moment in with an air of uncertainty.

Asahi was the first to break the silence with a slight cough, “Wow…” he began. “She actually apologized to Swan. “I mean, it’s a shit apology, but it’s an apology. I didn’t think Swansin was capable of saying those two words.”

“I think this deserves a point to be removed from her tally,” Cherry decided.

"i jsut want to tell u that you suck. And stink. And can go fuock an elephent." Then she turned and walked away. This is the fuocking thanks i get for hepling to protekt her from angela yesterday god fuocking dammit.

“Protect?” Briar asked with a scoff, “You did no such thing. You tied her in a bathroom stall, and when Angela was after you, you demanded she go after Bella instead. You said, and I quote; ‘No, get Bella. She’s tied up.’.”

Asahi nodded his head in agreement. “Not to mention you tried to frame her for the murder of her father,” he reminded sharply. “A murder you committed.”

 I waentd to cry becuz angela hadnt kiled her but then i stoped and went insied my mind and smacked my inner biotch and told her to stop being suoch a biotch.

“An’ now you wanna cry cause Angela didn’t kill her,” Cherry rolled her eyes. “Make up your mind, ya idiot! Were you tryin’ to protect her, or sacrifice her?”

"who is that gurl" alec sed starrily.

"shes bella shes a biotch" i sed.

"shes beyutiful" he sed dreemilee.

Asahi leapt to his feet, clapping his hands together, “Yes!” he yelled. “Yes, Zalec, she is. Thank you, for noticing her and appreciating her!”

I culdnt staend the thught of him lusting ofter such a fuocking hore so i decided to set him strate.

"no u don't want to get involved with her. Right edowerd?" i asked.

"yes milday doth not wanteth toeth get involvedeth with that ho" he concluded poste hayste. But then in the moment jane saw everyting going on.

“It’s like she’s trying to be Regina George, but being too mean, even for Regina,” Cherry commented. “Like, guys, just let him be with Bella. Stop tryin’ to involve yourselves with other people’s love lives!”

"WHATS RONG WITH U AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH ?!" she asked wile crying. It was disgusting becuz snot and teers wer runingn down her faec. Then she ran off into the girls bathrum so alicai claritee me and tanishashanqua folowed her wile edowerd went to go beet up dalec for being such a doosh.

“There are… several questionable things about this,” Briar began with mild hesitation. “First, Alec did nothing wrong but say he thought Bella was beautiful. That does not make him a douche. Secondly; Jane is his sister. Is the author trying to push incest?”

“Oh, the author is absolutely trying to push incest,” Asahi confirmed.

"girl dont worry ur beyutiful" alicai pated jahne on the back caerfully.

"yeah if he cant see your beyuty then hes not good enuff for you in the first place" i told her.

Briar held her hounds out, face twisted into pure disgust. “He’s her brother,” she gritted out.

I felt good. Then i realized. Being good feels good. Maybe this was something i culd do afterall.

“Yeah, you can be good, but will you?” she asked, and paused so they could think back on the twenty-five chapters before this. The answer then was obvious, but she still said it. “You won’t.”

I was goign to be a better persun and leaf the lief of sin ive been folowing behind me. I went over to the last stal and there was a homeless person in it. I gave them som money. Then i gav him a poptart. It felt good!

Asahi groaned, “Why is there some homeless person just hanging out in the school bathroom?” he asked. “I mean, yeah, it’s good that you gave them some money, and some food, but why and how are they here?”

But then it was tiem for gim so we al had to go to class. We were playging dodjhal wich is a fun game were you hav to dodje shit that peepul are throwgin at you. Becuz of all my combat experiunce it was easy for me.

“I am the queen of dodgeball back home,” Cherry said, proudly puffing out her chest. “Team captains fight over who gets me on their team. I’m just that fuckin’ slippery to hit and that quick to snatch balls from the air.”

“Cool, I was never that good at dodge ball,” Asahi shrugged. “Then again, I never got too interested in it. Regardless, her ‘combat experience’ is boiled down to her being saved by everyone and stabbing people for no reason. Nothing to do with dodging balls.”

That whore bella was on the other team along with clairy. When she wuznt looking clarity pushed her and she fell down and got hit 15 tiems by everune on our ttem.

“Rude,” the Huntsman frowned.

“That point we took away for apologizing to Swan? It’s been added back to the tally and doubled,” Asahi stated, crossing his arms over his chest.

Then the other teem god angry and throo shit at bela. I laughed so hard that i though i wuld pee myself but i wuldnt in public so fuock u.

“Tripled,” Asahi gritted his teeth.

“She’s gonna have a few hundred points when it’s over,” Cherry predicted, “an that is being generous.”

As the gaem was almost ovar edowerd was hit so hard that he went thru the wall... It was CASPOR i meen CASMINE the transeccual boy! [AN: NASPER WENTS TO BE CALD JASMIN BECUS HE FELS MORE FEMINEN]

“More power to her,” Briar shrugged.

Cherry nodded, “Jasmine is a pretty name,” she said. “I’m sure she’ll be a beautiful woman.”

 he hade thrown a hal so fast it broke eodwrds spien twice.

“Nice,” Asahi clapped his hands, “Good job, girl.”

But then anya the bold stud up and cawt the ball! She was so beyutiful and fast and gud at editing. [AN: ANYA THIS IS U!]

“Ah, she has a new editor,” Briar mused. “I wonder how long this one will last.”

“I’m betting two chapters, and then she gives up,” Cherry said, taking a sip of her soda.

 she thrw a keyboard at bella and bella went ot the hospitul.

“A keyboard,” Cherry choked out, spitting out the soda. “She threw a fuckin’ keyboard? What the hell?”

Then i saw emmet. I went up to him and asked him how the gay thing was. It must be haerd not being with the une u luv becuz if he was with seth then saths family of wolves wuld exile the too and familee is all sath has sins his fathor dyed yesterdae.

Sighing, Asahi pinched the bridge of his nose. “If you love someone, and if your family can’t approve of your love, then you’re better off without family,” he said. “Now I don’t forgive Seth for what he did, but if he and Emmett truly love each other, they shouldn’t care about what others think and cut off the family who disapproves.”

Anywasy then we won the gaem but lost the match becuz they trid to make us go outsied and sins most of our teem is vampiors they culdnt play. So it was me and anya. We tried but there wer too many. 16 acshually.

“How do you win the game but lose the match?” Briar asked, then shook her head. “No, the reasoning is stupid. More importantly, I’m just imagining that Rebecca got struck by so many of the balls she’s currently a walking bruise.”

Cherry let out a sharp, wheezing laugh. “I love that.”

Anyways then we went to our next class but first i waented lunch so i skiped and evryon caem with me...

Asahi raised a brow, “Considering the principle wants you dead, you shouldn’t be skipping,” he said, paused, and chuckled. “Actually, do skip. Maybe that’ll make it easier for you to die.”

I wuz going to the bathrum were i hade fught angela to a draw and then helped to beet her when suddenly edowerd apperd!

“We’ve been reading the story,” Briar frowned. “We know that is not what happened.”

"EDOWERD WHAT THE FUOCK" i asked! this was the WOMINS bathrum!

"doth engaegeth in sex" he sed forsing himsefl on me! OH NO! WHAT WAS I GOING TO DO!?

“Wow, Edward. That’s forward,” Asahi deadpanned.

chapter 27 - the hospital bathroom

“It’s a bit annoying that she keeps bringing up how the school doubles as the town hospital,” Asahi said, shaking his head. “It’s even worse that now we need to specify that she’s in the hospital bathroom and not the school bathroom.”

“This girl really, an’ I mean really likes bathroom scenes,” Cherry clicked her tongue.

Oh no! wat was i gunna do edowerd wuz cuming to me to moleest me?

"no stop edowerd i dun get ti" i sed crying.

“Okay, her crying is actually completely justified, now,” Briar said, and made a face. “It feels weird validating what she says and does, though.”

“I feel no sympathy for her,” Asahi shrugged. “She constantly gave Swan crap for being a victim, and now she gets the same to happen to her. I think it’s fair play.”

 Why was edowerd tryign to do this to me? This was so fukced up!

“Maybe his reasoning is the same for why Clearwater assaulted Swan,” Asahi continued, narrowing his eyes at her. “By your very own logic, what he does is justified and Cullen is the real victim.”

Cherry nodded. “I don’t like this subject matter, but at the same time, I don’t wanna see ya acting like a whiny bitch after this with how ya treated Bella when she went through this.”

Teers wer runign down my face so quitlee and i wuz jsut so shoked. Edowerd tuk my rist and then throo me at the grund.

Briar had brought a closed fist to her mouth, “Break her spine, break her spine,” she chanted under her breath.

"doth beeth a bitcheth" he sed and then smackd me.

“She has always been a bitch, about time you noticed,” Asahi snarked.

 Then he riped my shirt off.

"why are you doing this!?" i screemed at him. "STOP! WHY!?" He hit me agin, this time with his cleets [AN: EDOWERD IS ON THE SOCCUR TEEM].

“He hit her with his cleats, not kicked her?” Cherry asked, tilting her head and trying to imagine the scene. “What did he do? Tear off his shoe an’ start smackin’ her in the face with it?”

 Then i felt sumthing red sleeping down my forehed. It was BLUD! he must have brike skin when he hit! "shit" i sed.

“Tis a flesh wound,” Asahi shrugged.

“It really is, at least for her,” Cherry agreed.

Edowerds eies turned all red andshit and then hey got huded. He luged after me but i got up and dodgd his atac.

“Because dodging a vampire with super speed and heightened reflexes is very easy for a human,” Briar said sarcastically. “TwilightRova really doesn’t know anything about vampires. Not even Twilight ones.”

He culdnt be resened with in his stayte and i was scrayd. I tride to run for the dur but then he apered and slamed it. Then he punched me and i flew back into the mirors. As i hit them they explouded into a bilion trilion shrads and they went everwere. Sum of it hit my faec and i culd tel i wuld get a scar.

“Seeing Swansin get the shit beat out of her is surprisingly cathartic,” Asahi mused as he leaned back, a slight smile on his face as he finally enjoyed the story. “This isn’t something you get to see often.”

Cherry nodded, looking equally as pleased, “I’m soakin’ as much of this in as I can before the inevitable happens and she somehow beats him.”

"AAAAAAAAAH" i screemed!

“Alas,” Briar monotoned her fake dismay. “The bathroom is completely soundproof, and thus no one passy by in the halls will be able to hear her cries and screams for aid.”

He hit me so hrad i went thru the sink too! Then before i culd reakt he had thrown me thru eech bathrum stal one bai one. There were five in tottal.

“I’m surprised she’s still standing,” Asahi hummed. “I suppose being resilient runs in the family.”

Finaly tho he tripped up and so i ran up to him with my katana and smaked him with it. I didnt want to hurt him he wuz my frend at one point so insted i just taped him withit.

There was a collective sigh. It had been nice seeing Rebecca Swansin on the receiving end for once, but it was over far too soon, and the tables turned in the most predictably lame way possible.

“Emphasis on smacked,” Cherry said sarcastically, rolling her eyes, “It’s not like ya wanna cut the person who was beatin’ you up an tryin’ to molest you. That’d just be rude.”

 He lost his frenzie and then luked at wat he did to the bathromo.

"doth fucketh" he sed and then before i new it he had sped out of the rum.

“The way to stop a vampire on a frenzied rampage is to… tap them with a sword,” Asahi deduced, brows furrowed together. “As Cullen said; the fuck?”

I new that i had to run and find alicai and tel her wat hapened. It was hard to run tho becuz blud was gushing down thru my foreheed and it wuz gettin in my eies.

“Of course it’s the blood on your face making it hard to run,” Briar shifted in her seat to rest her face on a hand, watching with disinterest. “It has nothing to do with being thrown into a mirror, through five bathroom stalls, and a sink, resulting in numerous bones, internal ruptures, and broken bones. It’s solely the gash on your forehead and the blood in your eyes that makes running hard.”

 As i ran down the hal i culdtn figur owt why edowerd did that to me. I meen i no ive dun bad things in the past but this wuz just out of cacater for edowerd.

“Okay, so maybe not the rape part, but ya definitely deserved the beatdown,” Cherry said.

 But then i shruged it off until i fund tanishashanqua and alicia and Jacob who was there for lunch break

“And Jacob is at their school and not the Indian restaurant he attends because…?”  Asahi asked, receiving no answer because there would not be any. Jacob was there just for the heck of it.

"what the FUCK gurl are you okay!?" Tanishashanqua asked. she tuk a cleen rag [AN" CLEEN TO PREVENT INFECSHINS] owt of her purs and then wiped my forehed with it.

“She’s really the most competent person here.” Cherry said.

“Her and Hale,” Asahi agreed, reminding her of Rosalie.

"alicia get out of heer u wont be able to resist the blud" Jacob sed to her. She noded her hed smoothlee and then jumped up the roof and out of scool grunds.

“You’ve got to make your exit memorable,” Briar mused.

Jacob picked me up with tanisahshanquas help and they tuk me to the hospitul wing of the scool. Then i blaked out.

When i woke up jacub was there with me. I had a yellow bandij on my hed were my wund was. Tanishashanqua was there to, but she wuz sleepign becuz sh ewas tired.

“Now be quiet, we don’t wanna wake Tanishashanqua up,” Cherry shushed.

Asahi shook his head, “That is still such a hard name to say.”

"rebecca u need to tell me what is the matter" jakub sed. "who did this to you. I want to help" he sed as he culd see me.

"it was edowedr he tried to raep me" I sed cheerliee

Briar frowned. “That is an unusual thing to be cheerful about.”

but no then sadlee becuz i had the shit beetin out of my.

“Ah, ya forgot ya ought to be sad bout that,” Cherry nodded. “No worries. Happens all the time.”

 FUCK THAT EDOWEDR GODDAMIT.

"itll be okay i'll go take caer of him" jakub sed as he got his axe out of his pockit.

Clearing his throat, Asahi rose to stand up, “Are you tired of your belts constantly breaking when you hang your axes on them?” he asked, holding an imaginary microphone to his mouth. “How about the axe hitting people or the walls whenever you try to squeeze by people?”

“Well, now ya don’t got to worry about any of that anymore!” Cherry joined in, jumping to her feet and doing a little twirl before gesturing to the table with the letters. “We’re here to introduce the newest innovation in the axeman lifestyle! The pocket-axe!”

“When you’re tired of cutting down trees and killing vampires, you just fold it up and slip it right into your pocket. Now you don’t have to worry about anymore axe-idents.” Asahi continued, lips curling into a little grin.

Cherry was snickering at the little pun, “It’s easy to store and quick to retrieve, perfect for spur of the moment axings. Call the number below, and for a low nine-hundred and ninety-nine dollars and ninety-nine cents, the pocket-axe could be yours today!”

Then he howled and turned into a fury and then juped out the window of the hospitul rum.

“The important question is if he was still carrying his axe when he did all that,” Briar said.

Cherry laughed as she plopped back down in her seat, “He’s just carrying it in his mouth at this point. Like a discount Great Grey Wolf Sif.”

I wuz glad that he wuz ther to support me. I wuld support him in my own speshal way in the futor.

“By stabbing him in the dick,” Asahi translated.

"fuck yu you cunt" i herd. I luked up. It was BELLA! She wuz the one in the hospitul bed to the side of mine! God fuocking dammit i thught to myself slylee.

“Bella, our favorite girl here. It’s so great to see you’re okay,” Briar smiled.

“At this point I’m convinced the girl’s immortal,” Cherry mused, “that’s the only way to explain how she just keeps comin’ back.”

"what!? What the fuck doyou want bella!? Cant u just leev me alone!? JUDAH FUOCKING DAMMIT U WEER ALWAS SUCH A FUCKING BITCH TO ME I HATE YOU" i screemd in fuory. Uh oh. I was supoed to be gud.

Asahi scoffed, “You’ve never been good.”

“She’s the opposite of good. She’s like Satan’s favorite problem causer,” Cherry agreed.

"thas hard to do when u do shit like KILL MY FUOCKING DAD YOU CUNT" she screemed even loudlier.

“She has a valid point,” Asahi said.

I gasped loudlee so that she culd understand my shouck.

"ur just jelus that chardly always luved me mora than you" i sed furiouslee!

“An you repaid that love by killin’ him,” Cherry scowled. “Real nice of ya.”

She was so shucked that she culdnt even say anyting to that. Then she luked down an troddin. Wich ment that she new i was rite. Wich ment that i weon.

“None of that justifies murdering him,” Briar pointed out.

Asahi shrugged, “She’s just jealous because we all know he loved Swan the most. Swansin is just full of herself.”

I got up out of my bead and went to the hospitul rum bathrum. Y didnt this victoree feel gud tho?...

“Oh, God!” Cherry shouted, reeling back. “Are ya finally learning empathy? Better late than never, I guess.”

As i steped into the bathrum to go tinkle my combat sens tingld.

“Look mom, I can rhyme! Are you proud of me, now?” Asahi snarked.

Sudenly i dodj roled out of the atac in the smal bachrum onlee to see... ANGELA THE VAMPIOR! She was back!

“Why do all these vampires love attacking girls in the bathroom?” Briar asked. “Edward did it once, and this is Angela’s third Bathroom Strike.”

“TwilightRova is in love with bathroom scenes,” Cherry said. “It’s weird, but I ain’t gonna kink shame.”

And she had a new BLAK CATANA! And she had triedto kill ME WITH IT! I ran out of the bathroom at my ful potenshil and assumd fightign pose in frunt of bella.

Asahi raised a brow, trying to comprehend what was happening, and having quite a bit of difficulty, “Are you attacking Swan? Defending Swan? Using Swan as a human shield?” he asked.

"shit motherfucker!" tanishashanqua screemed!

Cherry rolled her eyes. “Oh, ya woke up to the fight, but not to Bella and Rebecca screamin at each other?” she asked. “Damn ya have some selective hearing when sleeping.”

She got out her gun and poiynted it at the biotch angela. We wer gonna protekt bellas lief and also my life. I new that it was heer that i wuld maek up for my sins and devowlee folo judahs plan.

“I can’t believe it,” Briar said with a soft gasp. “They’re actually protecting Bella? Bella? Did someone replace Rebecca with a changeling?”

“Don’t get your hopes up,” Asahi warned. “This ‘nice act’ isn’t going to last long.”

As angela the vampiore stuck out the bathroom we prepard!

"u evaded me twise so now yuo both shall DIE" angela screemed! Then she LUGED!

“Oh, no,” Cherry said, looking at her nails. “She luged. How will anyone survive?”

okay i no i sed that i wuld reply to ny reviows but srsly

Jason Bartholomu 12/4/12 . chapter 16

Do you even lift?

lift what i dunt get it what the fuock is rung with u pepul

Looking away from her nails, Cherry stared at the screen with a face of pure disappointment. “Ya don’t get the most iconic and basic of memes?” she asked. “You should feel ashamed of yourself.”

chapter 28 - Rebecca & Bella vs Angela

Then she LUGED! I gasped wile tryign to deflekt angelas atack with my catana. She was very skiled but i think that i was more thern a match for her wile we were in the hospital rum.

“No,” Asahi said, shaking his head. “No, you are not.”

“She is as outmatched as can be,” Briar agreed.

"SHIT HOMIE GEDOWN" tanishashanqua SCREEMD as she usd her gun at angela. I was fsat enuf to dodge the bullits but if i hadnt bene then i wuld be ded.

“Considerin’ how fast bullets move, that’s physically impossible,” Cherry pointed out. “You aint the Flash.”

Angela didnt tho and she got shotted at leest 4 times in the neck. But she didnt say anything like i expected her to so it was werd. She jsut tryed to stab me and tanishashanqua and bella sum more so u no wat? Angelas a fuocking bitch.

With a scoff, Asahi crossed his arms over his chest and sank deeper into his seat. “Takes one to know one.”

Suddenly anya the bold ran in wile eeting cheetos and poptarts and luked at us but she was so scray by wat she saw that she ran out. [AN: ANYA GET UR AKT TOGETHUR UR SUPOSED TO BE EDITING NOT EATING CHEETOS U FATTI]

“That’s one way to chase away your editors,” Briar mused. “Yelling at the one editing your story and insulting her. Really effective. Completely ignoring that as the author, TwilightRova should be editing her story, too.”

“I’m surprised this Anya girl lasted this long,” Asahi admitted. “I assume that after this chapter she won’t be helping you anymore if this is how you treat her.”

 but then angela threw her sword like a boomeragn and it cut off anya the bolds arm so TAEK THAT U CAN GET UR ARM BAECK WHEN U START WURKING AGAIN!

“Ways to quickly sink a friendship; be like TwilightRova,” Cherry said.

"Bella u need to get out of here we caent hold her off for loung!" i sed wile trying to be a gud person. It was hard to prove it tho becuz there wer no homeliss pepul to give poptards to but whatevr.

“I don’t think you understand that doing good deeds because you want to be viewed as a good person is not the same as doing a good deed because it’s the right thing to do,” Asahi frowned. “The first is egocentric, you only do it for the praise and love. The second is because of a genuine want to help.”

Anyways then angela smacked tanishashanqua on the hed but she didnt stop THERE! then tanishashanqua luged at bella but i blocked the atack. Tasniahsnqua then tuk out a nife and went for Angela!

“Tanishashanqua, are you having difficulties remembering who you are supposed to be fighting?” Briar asked. “Understandable, this story is a confusing mess.”

"YOU WILL NOT STOP ME!" Angela screemed but then tanishashqnau stabed her in the gut with her getto nife and then i pushed her owt the window of the hospitul rum. Luckilee the rum is fiev storys up so angela had a long fal to deel with.

Cherry shrugged. “It’s actually a pretty quick fall when ya take into account the speed ya fall at.”

"we need to escape befor she climsb back up here" i sed serverlee. I luked ovar at Bella and Bella was just fuocked up becuz of this drama and shit.

"WHAT THE FUOCK IS GOIGN ON!?" she screemed.

“Honestly? An understandable response,” Briar said, while Asahi and Cherry nodded in agreement.

"luk motherfuocker that bitch is gonna kill you too if we dont run so u can eether stay here or run with us to be abel to survive" tanishashanqua sed.

"she wuz the one who atacked us in the bathrum stal" i sed to clarifye the situation.

“So long as you all stop going into bathrooms you will be safe,” Asahi saidl

Bella thught for a secund and then nodded her head.

"okay, ur right." She sed.

"we need to get away and fast" i sed as i locked the windows so that when angela tries any spiderman shit to get back into heer it wuldnt wurk.

“Locking the window does nothing if the glass can be broken,” Briar pointed out. “Though, considering the subpar intelligence this cast exhibits most of the time, the concept of breaking a window to get in probably won’t cross anyone’s minds.”

"how are we going to do that!? Shes so strong a powerful!" bella sed wile starting to cry a litle bit.

"Theres only 1 persun strong enuf to take on angela for shure" tasniahshanqua begined. "Rosey." I nodded my hed becuz this was a relly good idea. Thank gudness tasniahsnqua is such a gud friend with gud ideas.

“Thank God Tanishashanqua has the one brain cell this group shares,” Asahi sighed.

“All hail the holder of the brain cell,” Cherry began chanting before sagging with a tired sigh.

"does anybody have a car that we can use to get to the collins house?" i askd the too.

"i do!" bella sed and then we all went to the parkign lot to get into beds fuocking uglee truck. Even tho it was uglee and i haet it with all my pashin it was savign my lief now so i maed sure to remember to fix it when this was all ovar.

Perking back up, Cherry made a face as she read the text. “This is so weird. She’s… growin’? As a person?” she asked in disbelief. “Am I dreamin’?”

“No, and it’s jarring,” Asahi confirmed. “Though her idea of fixing it could still be par for the course with Swansin and just be ‘destroy it’.”

 I culd start to append for my sins by treeting the things in my life better. As we were gettign into the truck, we herd a fucking obnoxshis screech.

"GET BACK HERE BITCHES!" It was ANGELA! She was on a moturcycle! She tuk out a pistol and started to shoot bullits at us so we got into the truck fastlee.

“Motorcycles are… similar to mechanical horses,” Briar said slowly, trying to figure it out, and then nodded. “That’s rather cool”

“Motorcycles are awesome, I defs want one.” Cherry agreed.

 Tasniahsnqa and I got into the back bed [AN: THATS WERE U PUT THE KARGO AND SHIT IN A PIKUP TRUCK]

Asahi sighed, staring at the ceiling once again, “Everyone knows what a truck bed is.”

and asumed fihgting posishin. I tuk out my shotgun and shotted it at angela wile tanishahsnaqua tuk out her getto pistol and also shotted it.

"GO GO GO GO!" i screemed and then bella tuk off out of scool grounds and around the town while angela followed us. Agenla tried to shoot at the car but tanishashanqua shot back and i deflekted bullits with my anti-raep catana wile shooting with my shotgun.

Cherry shook her head, drawing her legs up to rest on the seat so she could prop her chin on her knees. “I always hated the ‘deflect bullets with a sword’ cliché,” she confessed. “It’s just… not as cool as anime tries to make it.”

 It was hard, to sto pthe bullits, but i had to protekt bella, the driver of this vehicol. but then Angela activated her turbo button and then she was speeding up so fast that theer wouldnt be a chanse for us to escape! It was as if she had a jet in that fucking moturcycle!

And then she was raising her head, watching with wide eyes. “Now that? Jet powered motorcycle? That’s cool.”

"Bella!" i screemed! "Speed up! We arent lusing her!"

"IM TRYING DONT DISTRAKT ME" bella screemed. I meen i understand her srtress but hello tanishashanqua and i wuldnt let anything happen to her. But whatever she desruves the beenfit of the doubt.

Groaning, Asahi shook his head, “This is so weird,” he muttered.

 We sped up rally fast and then Bella tuk the truck out of the town and into the windign roads behind the town. There were lots of trees everywhere and it began to raen liek crazee so i felt at home.

“They passed the magical barrier that kept all the rain outta town,” Cherry deduced.

Briar frowned, leaning forward to read the text, “This is getting dangerous. More so than usual with anything pertaining Rebecca,” she said. “High speed chases on slippery, muddy grounds are risky.”

“It we’re lucky, they’ll crash the truck, and everyone will die,” Asahi offered, but then shook his head. “We’re not lucky enough.”

Suddenlee a coip car starded to get in on the chase too! We were tryign our best to deflekt bullits but then the fuockign cops tried to drive US off the road insted of angela!

"Tanishashanqua the cops are alyed with Angela!" i sed! We were doomed unless we culd get those biotches off our backs!

“It could be because they figured out you murdered both Charlie and the principal,” Briar suggested.

“Or because they’re cops, and you are breaking many, many laws right now,” Asahi added with a shrug. “High speed chases and bullets alone would be reason enough for the cops to get involved.”

"i got this motherfucker" tanisahsnqua sed and then she shot the cop driving the car in the hed and he died and his car went off a cliff and exploded.

“More murders to your list, good job,” he said in a deadpan tone.

 Then we went back to doign what we were doign before.

"YOU WONT ESCAPE EASILEE!" angela screemed and then she tuk her gun and aymed it at the tire of the truck and SHOT THE BULLIT! IT HIT! THEN IT MADE A NOISE! Tanishashanqua and me almost fell out but before i new it Angela had use d the swurve to JUMP INTO THE TRUCK WITH US! FUCK!

“Somehow she has made this simultaneously exciting and dull,” Briar said with mild amazement, “It’s actually unnerving that she managed to do that.”

"FUCK YOU" i screemed and engayged her in one on one swordfightign. It wuz her black catana versis my anti rape catana and it luked liek i was losing!

“Surprisin’ absolutely no one,” Cherry said, waving a hand in the air.

 I just culdnt keep up with her enhansed vamprie powers! FUCK! She then pujnched me in the boob and smacked me!

She immediately lowered her hand to wince. “Boob punch, ouch. Low blow.”

Then she luged for tanishansqua! NOOOO!

"FUUUUUUUUCK" tanishahsnqua screemed as angela cut off her pistol hand with her evil black catana! Then she picked up one of my onlee friends and threw her out the back of the truck wile bella was driving it at 120 miles per hours!

“Great. You killed off one of the few genuinely interesting characters,” Asahi groused. “Thanks a lot.”

It was tramatic taek my wurd for it.

“I’ll have to, we have no other reason to think it would be,” Briar said with a shrug.

"Bitch please this is still my fucking turf ur on" someone sed. IT WAS ALICIA! She was drivign a sports car and had caght tanisahsnaqua's bodee with the hood of her car.

“That’s actually gonna hurt a lot,” Cherry winced.

“It’s less of catching herm, more like Alicia hit her with her car and Tanishashanqua just stayed on,” Asahi added. “But, at least Alicia is here, now they have a little better chance of survival.”

Tanishashanqua got into the car wile alicai shot at angela frum the sports car. I new then that this wuz my chase to get a hit in on angela so i struck and almost nocked her off the speedign truck! Btu then she hung on and overpowerd me.

“Surprisin’ no one,” Cherry groaned.

"No matter how many of u weeklings show up I will still rain supreme!" she sed evilee! Alicia used her vampire strength to shoot many bullits at angela but angela also was a vampiore so she dodged them like a profesional. But no! some of the bullits that missed angela wuz going to hit bella! I tried to dodge into the atac but i onlee tuk too bullits!

“It’s so jarring that she’s throwing herself into danger to protect Bella,” Briar commented with a frown, glancing to her companions. “Is this the same Rebecca?”

“Could be her good twin,” Cherry offered.

"SHIT" i screemed. I had faild and culdnt protekt bella. Even tho i akt like i hate her shes secretely always been my role model and i shuldve been nicer to her.

“Know what this is?” Asahi asked, holding out his hand and bringing his fingers together. “Growth.”

A singul teer drop fell frum me faec as i relized wat was goign to hapen. I herd a screem from bella, and suddenlee the car went off the side of the roed and into the wuds. Angela and i went flyign over 70 feet in the aeir along with the truck. As we wer in midair bella fell from the truck and angela stabed me in the stomick, but not before i shoved my antiraep catana into her nee!

“That’s three deaths, right?” Cherry asked. “At least Becca’s one of the casualties.”

 She kickedd me and i went flying even furthor. But then as i hit a tree on the way down, i herd an exploshin. Then everything went blaeck as i fell...

“That,” Briar said, clasping her hands together and pointing her joined middle and pointer fingers at the screen, “is the sound of your insides turning to mush.”

Chapter 30: woods

“The less successful knockoff to the hit “Into the Woods” musical,” Cherry nodded.

I woke up in the fucking awful rain becuz seriously people I dont love it THAT much I mean geeze.

“You kept saying you loved the rain, and complained that it didn’t rain enough,” Asahi pointed out, “and now you’re complaining that you don’t love it that much? Make up your mind.”

Anyways my head really fucking hurt because i had been sent through a fall. I didnt know where Angela was because she had gone flal too but I knew that if I honed myself that I could find bella.

“If Swan is dead, we will riot,” Asahi warned.

Cherry nodded her head, “I’m already sharpenin’ my pitchforks.”

I found my shotgun and katana and put then in the ground int he forest I was in. It was almost dark. I could tell ecause the sun was setting. Time had passed. I cliped my hands together and prayed to Judah that something would guide me way. Then I opened my eyes and saw the Elf Grandfather who was pointing at the car wreck with Bella underneeth it!

“There are suddenly elves? And elven grandparents?” Briar asked.

“Eh,” Asahi shrugged, “It’s not the weirdest thing thrown our way by this story.”

I ran to the reck and saw that Bellas hand was the only thing not under her fucking trashed truck. It was burning and smoke and shit and the trees were going to burn down soon.

“Save her, or perish,” Cherry glowered.

"Bella dont worry I'll save you!" I screemed because I was a good person and shoved the truck with all my mite. It was no use those I couldn't gain ground against the truck because of Newton's laws against moving objects! [AN: FUCK YOU NEWTON]

Her glower shifted to an eye roll, “Newton had nothin’ to do with this.”

"rebeeca you goddamn it fucking ugly stupid whore help me goddamn you and fuck this" she whinied at me which was totally unhelpful right now I mean c'mon I'm trying to concentrate at the moment.

“To be fair,” Briar began in a placating tone. “Now is not the best time to complain.”

"GODDAMNIT IM TRYING" I screamed at her. I mean if she didn't have such a fucking huge truck this wouldnt be tough the thing ways like 15 tons. But then my combat sense tingled and I looked behind me and suddenly ANGELA APPEARED in the sky and and she started to use her sword in me!

“Phrasing,” Asahi muttered.

“She meant what she said,” Cherry countered. “The sword’s in her.” As Asahi made a face of disgust, she began cackling.

"I'll kill you! HIYAH" She screened as she luged over and over again. I tried to fight back but it was hard because bella was there nad she was the targit and I was trying to protect Bella but Angela used and I couldn't truck!

“She… couldn’t truck?” Briar questioned and looked to Cherry, “Is that some form of slang?”

Cherry shrugged, “If it is, it ain’t any I’ve heard.”

"WHAT YOU SAY TO ME!?" I screamed as I punched Angela's breasts in the fight.

Looking back to the screen, Cherry curled her lip back, “Another boob punch? Ouch.”

 It was a ground blow but it was all I could do to stay in front. "You're a monster Angela and I won't let you harm people!" I screemed harder this time! But then Angela jumped into the air with her Katana and cut my shotgun in half! Oh shit! I was so fucked!

“Well, it was nice knowing you, Swansin,” Asahi said, and after a few moments his stoney expression twitched into a wry grin, “Nope. Couldn’t keep a straight face. Honestly? Good riddance, won’t miss you at all.”

"IF I AM A MONSTER THEN I WILL BE THE MONSTER COACH!" She screemed while flying. "THE FIRST IN MANKIND AND THE FIRST ALL OVER THE WORLD!"

“You are certainly not the first monster,” Briar said, shaking her head, “But I’ll give you credit; to my knowledge you will be the first monster coach.”

“What does that even mean?” Cherry whispered. “She coaches others in bein’ monsters?”

Then she stopped flying right on top of me. As bella was getting her face burned and crushed by the Car Angela just kept stabbing me and stabbing me with her Katana of death until She picked me up with it and impaled me.

“Okay, I can compromise,” Asahi said, clapping his hands together. “I’ll be okay with Swan dying if Swansin dies as well.”

"AAAAAAAAAA" I screemed in shire agony! THERE WAS A FUCKING SWORD IN ME AND SHE WAS SPINNING ME AROUND WILE I WAS ON IT!

“I feel like I’ve seen this in a Dark Souls boss fight,” Cherry mused right as Briar muttered “This gives me some ideas.”

She was just to strong. This was the final line for me and bella. None of my friends were around to save me. Jacob was after Edoward who was running away from Fucks and Alicia was with Tanishashanqua wherever the fuck they were and And nerd Clarity was actually in that the school.

“I honestly forgot she existed,” Asahi confessed.

 I tried to take a breath but it was hard because Angela was using a sord to mvoe me.

Then all of a sudden a gunshot went off and Angela threw me off to the sword with great power! She cut the bullet in half and we both looked up! It WAS CHOCOLOVE!

“Never mess with the strippers,” Cherry cackled.

"Angela stop" he said while looking like a teachor.

"Why the fuck shuld I?" She asked as I was there and on the ground almost dead

“If only you’d commit,” Briar sighed, leaning back.

and Bella was almost dead to. She was about to snap my neck so it was good that Chocolove arrived to stop her!

"Because" he said wile pointing at Angela the Vampire! "When you were alive, I WAS YOUR FATHER ANGELA!" She then started to cry becuz she was just confused by touching it all. Then she got fucking angry!

“What a twist!” Asahi said in as much of an exaggerated voice as he could muster.

Briar gave a shrug, “I think tears are understandable in the face of such absurd confusion.”

"YOU LYING FUCKER" she screemed and then tried to stab him but Chocolove's forcefeld stopped her from comign close to him. "AAAAAA" she screemd as she went flying backwards into an other grandfather elf tree.

“That poor grandfatherly elven tree,” Briar said, giving a somber shake of her head. “Gone from us too soon.

"ITS TRUE" he screemed! "YOUR MOTHER IS NONE OTHER THAN RENNY!" Everybody at the sene gasped because of the revelatin! If angela was renny's dohter then that meant that... "YES!" Chocolvoe screemed! "THAT MAKES ANGELA BELLA'S SISTER!"

“Clearly Renée had the true harem,” Asahi said.

“That must be where Bella got being bland as bread and five guys wantin’ her from,” Cherry added.

And then Angela started swearing so much that I'm not even gonna fucking write it becuz seriously it would take up like 5 pages of text.

“Talk about lazy,” Briar monotoned. “I for one would rather read five pages of cursing than this absurdity.”

"you bitch" Angeal screamed and then broke down on the ground.

"Its true their insides are made of the same blood..." he said. "My daddy blood".

Asahi groaned, leaning back to look away from the screen. “I detest the word ‘daddy’. It just feels so wrong.”

“More importantly,” Cherry said. “Charlie’s Bella’s dad, so wouldn’t they be sharin’ Renée’s mommy blood?”

He reached over to smack her on the arm. “Don’t say mommy either.”

And then all of a sudden my pain wouldn't release because Angela had still stabbed me. But then something amazing happened that saved my life that I will never forget!

"HOMING MISSLE BOMB STRIKE" sed a voice! The voice belonged to Alec!

Asahi raised a brow. “You’re still here? All done with the twincest drama going on between you and your sister?”

 All of a Sudden Angela went missiling up into the air like some sort of flying projectile and left the atmosfear. Jane was there too but she was a had so it didn't matter.

“Wow,” Cherry remarked, “You just can’t help bein’ rude, can ya?”

"What are you doing here you fools?" Chocolove asked

"I am here to save Bellanita and Rebeccadora [AN: THOSE ARE THEIR FULL NAMES]

“I don’t know about Rebecca, but Bella’s full name is Isabella Marie Swan,” Briar corrected and frowned. “I hate that I know her full name.”

“Bellanita and Rebeccadora are stupid fuckin’ names,” Cherry added. “She thinks slappin’ on Adora’s name will make her half as iconic as that gay disaster? Well, she’s wrong!”

from sertin death" Alec said. "They are too close to the collin compound and you know what lies in there! We must not let Esme see them!" And then Jane nodded and made a incantation to say "HOLY" and then the truck got up and rolled over and away from Bella so that we culd save her.

"Don't worry" Alec said to me. "My powers sent her to the MOON" he screamed.

“She’ll be back within the hour,” Asahi said, unconcerned.

"I won't let you ruin my plans!" Chocolove said with anger and blood dripping from his voice and then his forsefield grew to ten times the original amount! "Esme will hear about this blatant betrayl of our plans and then you will suffer the consequences!"

That lack of concern morphed into pure confusion. “I’m sorry?” he asked. “What?”

“The stripper was evil all along,” Briar mused. “What a shocker.”

"what are you saying Chocolove!?" I managed to ask wile bleeping out onto the forest ground.

“Gotta give you props, as much as it makes me wanna puke to do so,” Cherry said, making a face as she said that. “It’s impressive you’re still awake after all that blood loss.”

"I wont asnwer that because it would spoil my plans" he said. And then he made to summon a Lance and equiped it to do battle with.

"Well too bad they are our friends and we will save them" jane sed finally speaking up! Then she made a ninjutsu sign and then screamed "TELEPORT" and the four of us (Me, Bella, Jane, and Alec) teleported away from Mr. Chocolove!

“What?” Asahi asked. “Is this Naruto, now?”

This time Cherry reached over to smack him. “Dude, shut up. Don’t say that name, I’ve got a bad feelin’ regarding it.”

Chapter 31: Return to School

Suddenly like as if were teleported we were in the school. I was there with my wounds and Bella was there with her face and shit all burned and alec and Jane were there to.

"We will take Bella to the facility" said Alec. He puked up Bella with amazing speed and pushed everyone out of his way to the hospital. Jane cried like the hag she is and then teleported away.

“I’m going Belec, now,” Cherry decided, settling back into her seat. “Just to spite TwilightRova.”

“The incest going on with her new punching bag is weird, but also unnecessary in the cruelty,” Asahi said, frowning at the treatment Jane was getting.

 So then I had to go to class to find claritee because she was the only one who could be my friend since Jacub was in the pursuit and Tanishashanqua and Laicia wer .

“Or, more accurate, no one really wants to be friends with you anymore, not at this point after how you treat everyone,” Briar corrected. “So they’ve taken any excuse they can to avoid being around you.”

 Then I looked up at the clock and there was enough time left in the day to go to my next class wich was a math class. I hate math because I'm not very good at it because of Newton [AN: FUCK YOU AGAIN NEWTON].

Sighing, Cherry reached up to tug on a pigtail, “Girl, Newton has nothin’ to do with how much ya suck. He didn’t create the laws, he just put words to them.”

"I'm sorry I'm late sir I was busy fiting angela" I said to the teachor who was suppled to be Mr Clearwater but I acted a gasp when it wasn't! It was Hasmes the man whose arm was missing after he consumed Clear water!

“I forgot Hames was still alive,” Briar commented, paused, and frowned. “That’s a running theme, isn’t it? Characters vanish, and they’ve been so unremarkable and so easily forgettable, we just… forget they exist.”

“It’s a sign of bad writing,” Asahi said with a shrug. “In a well written story, characters wouldn’t be so easy to forget once they weren’t around.”

"PAY ATTENTION TO THE BOARD REBECCA" screemed Hames the Vampire teacher of my Calculus class as I perfectly sat to my seat. We were learning things like how to divide funktions and trickonometry. "YOU ARE THIEVING KNOWLEDGE FROM THE OTHER STUDENTS" he screamed wile waving chalk and shit around the class. I don't get why I even try its not like I'm asian or anything so fuck this shit.

Immediately, Asahi’s face twisted into a scowl as he raised his hand and curled four of his fingers so only his middle was still out. “Fuck. You.”

“Everyone’s gotta learn math, so deal with it,” Cherry added.

"Psst Rebecca want to buy some weed" sad the boy to the left of my seet! IT WAS SERKADES! [AN: SERKADES IS ONE OF THE SNERKERS].

“Who, from the what?” Briar asked.

Lowering his hand, still looking rather pissed at the screen, Asahi crossed his arms and sank into his seat. “No idea.”

He was a sit there and selling drugs to me and everything! I went all D: and then he Took out the dope and waved it in my fucking face. "I need it to pay for my props" he tried to say slidely.

"Mr Hames serkades is selling drugs!" I told the teechor but he was so busy reducing Clitoria that he didn't notice.

“Ouch,” Cherry winced. “A clit reduction in the classroom’s gotta be painful.”

 "No I don't want any of your fucking drugs so stop before alicai sees you beside I am too far above the inner fluence" I told him. I was trying to help I mean if Alica saw this shit she would fuckign kill him for being on her turd.

“Fair enough. Though I think standing in a pile of shit is punishment enough, but to each their own,” Briar shrugged.

"Your strong so I can not do anything to encourage you" sad Serkades because he just kept on trying to sell. "I'll call you when I'm selling cheap" he sed and swiped me his phone number for texting because nobody calls anymore.

“Who the hell is Serkades?” Cherry demanded. “It’s drivin’ me crazy tryin’ to figure out who that is.”

I riped it up because I was done being a bad person and I didn't even try to stab him so I felt good about myself just like it should be. In fact I was going to tell on him and do the right thing so he could sort his life out. Judah would want that.

“She didn’t try to stab him, that is impressive knowing her,” Asahi commended. “It’s strange seeing her try to be good. But that doesn’t get her off the hook for her ‘Asian’ remark.”

"Bye mr Hames I am going to the School police" I told Hames as I got up and left and he just stuck his middle finger up at my because she was busy kussing his lady bitch's face to notise his job. I walked down the fucking empty halls and located Arrow's room since his is a liutenant [AN: THE SCHOOL POLICE ARE IN ARROWS ROOM].

“At this rate, all this school needs is a bank and it’s effectively it’s own town within a town,” Briar said.

 But I heard mouning going on inside so I quickly opened the door to investigate!

"WHAT THE FUCK" I SCREAMED because I was scared. My old fiend Clarity Etude Symphonia was on the desk laying there and Arrow was on top of her as a Bat masticating on her body! He just kept going and going it was fuckign sick. There was blood everywhere like a volcano in Italy.

The three made faces of disgust. Cherry lurched over and began gagging, making retching noises in response, as Asahi began bemoaning about the vulgarity of it all as he lurched forward and buried his head in his knees.

“Disgusting,” Briar said, stone faced, “Absolutely revolting.”

 "Get off of her what the fuck are you doing!?" I screemed and took out my Katana and threw it across the room but the Bat dodged and I tried to get but I could because bats and its wings kept fapping.

“How is it still… still…that,” Cherry said, waving her hands desperately at the screen, “as a bat?”

“I don’t think you want to know,” Asahi answered, and shuddered, “I certainly don’t.”

"You disgusting shit I will kill you" the bat said using Ekolocation to translate thoughts into me! "I have killed this worthless hunam and drained her of all of her blood" he translated loudly!

“That’s not even how echolocation works,” he added with a groan.

"You sick fucker your wrong I am a vampire too!" Clarity screemed as she got up to kill Bat but he stopped her and went through her breasts to get inside her body! "FUUUCK" Clarity screemed!

“What is even going on?” Cherry screamed, tugging hard at her hair.

Asahi reached over to pat her on the shoulder, “Again. You don’t want to know.”

"I am now inside her body it is warm like a volcano's bakemeat. I shall nest in here" he said and then closed the entrance to her body so that he would be safe.

He looked from Cherry to the screen, “We’re in Alien now.”

“That’s even worse!” she bemoaned.

"Arrow stop trying to live inside of Clarity!" I screemed to protect my friend! I wanted to kill him but I couldn't not without killing clarity too.

"There is no use Rebecca" Clarity said now crying a lot not as much as Bella when Chadley had died but more than when Bella cried over Mikes dead body.

“Bella is now a gauge of how sad you are. Are you ‘my cousin murdered my dad’ sad, or ‘this somewhat friend who won’t take a hint has died’ kind of sad?” Briar asked.

"He will nest in me and you cannot harm him without killing me first" she sed.

“Time to take one for the team,” Asahi said, nodding to Clarity.

"Clarity you are my friend we will solve this predicament" I sad. "Esme will pay for this!" I also sad this time waving my fists towards the sun.

“What did Esme do? She had nothing to do with Aro being a disgusting creature,” Briar said.

“She’s just a mum who wants to raise kids,” Cherry added, “Leave her out of this.”

"No Rebecca you must know what I found out before…" She sad as she drew her gun from her bra. She was shaking because she was losing control of her body to the parasite Arrow inside.

“Most men are parasites, so what’s the difference?” Cherry asked.

Asahi smacked her, again, on the shoulder. “Fuck you,” he muttered.

She laughed, rubbed her shoulder, and held her hands up in surrender, “M’bad. Bad joke.”

 "The volutre are a diversion… Esme hired them to kill anyone on Cocolove's trail…" She was puking blood now because Arrow was eating her from the inside. She took out a jar of holy water. I was crying it was so traumetric.

“You should see a therapist,” Briar suggested. “For numerous reasons.”

 "He is the masterind behind everyting and he is connected to everything… You were not always supposed to…" she stopped and then her eyes rolled back like some weird chuky shit.

“Chocolove is the beginning and the end, the alpha and omega. He is everything and nothing. He knows all, sees all,” Asahi droned on. “He is the villain we do not deserve, but the one who may be able to end Swansin’s reign.”

“Fingers crossed he wins,” Cherry muttered.

"NO! CHARLITY YOU ARE MY BESTEST FRIEND DON'T DO THIS TO YOURSELF THERES NO GOING BACK!" I scremed but it wasn't enough. "IF YOU DO THIS THAN YOU WILL BECOME THE GERATEST MONSTER OF THIS WORLD OF THEM ALL!"

“Well,” Briar whistled, “You’re exaggerating a bit.”

“How is she even ‘doing anything’?” Asahi questioned. “Her insides are currently being eaten by a perverse bat. All she’s doing is dying. And you’re calling her the greatest monster of the world for dying?”

"URGHGHGH GOODBYE" Clarity barfed and then she chugged the entire jar of holy water. Then her entire insides caught the fire and everything except for her bones and muscles and skin burned up she no longer had orgins to donate in case someone was going to dye.

“As a vamp, she probs shouldn’t be donating organs in the first place, unless ya wanna go all ghoul on people needing organ transplants,” Cherry pointed out. “I mean, that’d add an interesting layer to the story, but I don’t trust ya to write something like that and not butcher it like you’ve butchered everything else in this dumpster fire.”

"AHAHAHAHA NOW I CONTROL HER!" Arrow said from inside Claritee as he piloted her like a giant mecha like in one of those animees. "IT IS I THAT CAN GRASP THE GERATEST MONSTER BY BEING THE GREATEST MONSTER OF THEM ALL!" But the clarity I knew was dead inside arrow had masticated into her and then she had commited to suicide by drinking water and now she was hollow. "THANK YOU REBECCA YOU MADE ALL OF THIS POSSIBLE" He screemd and then using Clarity he ran out of the Office.

“So we’re all in agreement that Swansin is the final villain of this story, right?” Asahi asked, looking around, and not waiting for an answer. “Right? Good.”

I ran out of the office too but I was crying because today had been really bad. Then Alicia and Tanishashanqua and Jacub and Edowerd all came to me. Except edowerd couldn't talk because he was typed up and his mouth was closed with duck tapes.

“Black proved his worth and caught Cullen. Suppose he can be a good dog now and then,” Asahi mused, crossing his arms over his chest once again.

“The gang’s all here so time to return to the usual bullshit,” Cherry added with enthusiasm faker than an influencers life.

"What is wrong Rebecca?" Said Jacub. He helped me close very sexily I could even felt his nipples through his shirt.

“For someone who claims to be so religious and chaste, it is hilarious that you are constantly sexualizing others,” Briar remarked.

"Clarity just died" I sad.

"Aww that stinks" Said Alicia

Asahi rolled his eyes, “You can really see how well loved she was, when the most she gets in response to dying is ‘that stinks’.”

which reminded me of smoking da Mary J.

"By the way that fucker Serkades is trying to steal your turf where were yoy anyways!?" I questioned while flapping my raven hair with golden streaks in the dramatic sexy wind.

“The return of her stupid colored hair blowin’ stupidly in the wind,” Cherry scoffed. “It ain’t dramatic or sexy. It’s dumb.”

“It’s very stupid,” Asahi agreed. “And the timing for it just makes no sense. This isn’t a ‘dramatic’ moment. It’s just her being a nark.”

"I was getting a new hand" sad Tanishashanqua who now had a robot hand sort of like Luke Skywinkers from Revenge of the Jedis. "The surger was difficult but I pulled it through" she said.

“Robot hand? That’s pretty cool,” Briar admitted. “I can see how useful it would be in a fight.”

“Robotic limbs are the fuckin’ shit!” Cherry laughed. “If I ever lose a limb, give me a robotic replacement.”

"THAT FUCKER" Alicai said and took off into the school with a gun equipped to use on SErkades that turd. Alicai would settle him straite.

"But anyways Rebecca why are you so beat up" Jacub asked.

"Because wile you were away Angela attacked me Bella and Tanisha and then Bellas truck fell and Chocolove stopped the killings!" I told him. He nodded very quickly at first but then stopped and did it slowly. Suddenly it became raining and thundering outsied so I felt at home.

“I’m surprised she isn’t yelling at him for not being there and helping,” Briar hummed as she read. “It certainly feels like something she would blame him for, and then start crying over, while bemoaning what a terrible person he is for just not being present.”

“Give it time,” Asahi assured her.

"We need to investighat Chocolove" Jacub said. Tanishashanqua wasn't sure at first since this was her dad and this meant that he was a lying cheator on her mother because shes a year older than angela (Tanishashanqua is 18) so now she had a reason to rebel.

“Yikes, gotta feel bad for Tanishashanqua. Her dad went an’ cheated on her mom, and her half-sister tried to kill them,” Cherry said with a wince.

"Jacob you go find Alicia and do that." Tanishashanqua said while taking control of the situation.

“Tanishashanqua is the true boss here, I would trust her with my life,” Asahi nodded his head. “I fully expect to die, but I’d trust her to get the job done efficiently.”

 She was preparing to distance, I could really tell. Jacub ran off and then Edowerd Tanishashanqua and me were left. "We need to go find Alec and Jane, some is telling me that they are more into this than we think." Tanishashanqua said and with that we were off to go an interrogate the two.

“Well, they are part of the Volturi,” Cherry reminded. “So it makes sense they’re involved.”

AN: I have decided on what I will do after kronicals I will write a prequel telling of how angela became the vampire bitch that she is today I hope you all red it when it comes out BUT THIS ISNT ADVETISING SO DON'T TAKE IT THAT WAY GEEEZE

“I would rather skinny dip in a shark tank with a bleeding wound than read the prequel,” Asahi growled, glaring at the screen. “And yes, this is technically advertising.”

“Also,” Briar interjected, “Why implement this in the middle of the chapter? Why not wait to type that until the end, at the authors note?”

“Cause that requires common sense, an’ we all know she lacks it,” Cherry explained, twirling some hair around her finger.

But Tanishashanqua and jacub couldn't do it so they caem back. Then we were the 5 crusdaers again because clarity was a robot for arrow who was piloting her quickly. The 5 of us were there to crusade against esme and shit so we went out to buy dresses and suits for the guys for the upcoming school dance.

“Well, that is nice. The girls buying the guys their suits,” Briar said, nodding her head. “I nice little switch of gender norms. I approve.”

“Oh yeah, a mandator and stupid dance,” Cherry sighed, shaking her head. “I kind of hate it.”

“Kind of?” Asahi asked, raising a brow.

 I had a feel that esme would attack then because she is a mega fucking bitch who ruins everything he touches.

“Can you leave her alone? Your hatred of her makes about as much sense as your hatred for Swan,” Asahi complained. “And that is, none. It makes zero sense.”

We went to the market district [AN: ITS FAR FROM THE GETTO ONE TANISHASHQNA DOESN'T COME OUT HERE MUCH BECAUSE SHES POR]

“The emphasis is appreciated,” Briar snarked. “Classism, racism, and shaming someone for being poor. You really are talented at multitasking.”

to buy fresses for the dance. I saw one that was fucking beautiful with maching pink laces on the gown and Alicai told me to buy it. But at first I didn't have any money but then I remembered that when I killed Chardly I stole his wallt too so I opened that up and took the money from it.

“Wow,” Asahi said in disbelief. “First you kill him, pretend to feel guilty about it, keep pretending that you have to redeem yourself for it, and now you use the money you stole from him to buy a dress. A fucking dress.” He buried his face in his hands to muffle his snarl. “How do you still think you’re a good person?”

I felt bad for about a second I mean it was his fault he dyed the stupid fucker

Asahi moved to bite his arm to muffle the screaming as Cherry patted him on the back. “Rude. It’s not his fault he died, that’s on you, bitch,” she stated.

so I took the money and began to use it to pay for the dress when then I saw who the casher was!

"CHADLEY WHAT THE FUOCK" I scremed! Jacub Edowedr Alicai and Tanishahsnqua all looked amazed and then scared and then worried. "I thought you died" I sed crying because this was so emenstionul for me.

Asahi let go of his arm to stare up with frustration and confusion, even Briar reeled back from that. “Wait, so Charlie is alive, now?” She asked, confused. “He somehow survived, he’s retired from being a cop and is now a cashier?”

"actuall you killed me swine" he sed.

“She absolutely is swine,” Asahi agreed.

I looked at him and he was a vampire just like Edowerd and Alicai and Esme and Angela and all the others.

"WHAT THE FUCK YOU FUCKER YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR THAT" I screemed! I mean geeze he didn't have to go do that if he was alive all along.

“Her logic is insane,” Cherry groaned. “He survived, she didn’t kill him, an’ now she’s pissed because he’s alive? The fuck?”

“I’m still trying to wrap my head around it all,” Asahi groaned.

"But wait we flamed the house" edowerd spoke to say. "how can you be?!"

"Esme saved me fool she took my body and vamped it out" he sed and then he stuck his arm out at me and graped my throat. It really fucking hurt but not as much as the payne in my heart from having to have to put down chadley again for being an abomeration.

“This is absolutely justified. You killed him, and now he’s getting his revenge,” Briar defended, a tight frown on her face. “Secondly; abomination? I suppose by that logic, Alicia and Edward are both abominations as well. I’m sure they’d love to know that’s what you think of them.”

“Oh, they won’t care at all, because it’s Becca,” Cherry grumbled.

Asahi shrugged, “I mean, Cullen, canonically, always hated himself and saw himself as a monster and abomination. He, and I hate to say this, would absolutely agree with her if she called him one.”

I cut off his hand with my Katana and then engaged him in combat.

"fuck you" I said and then cut his head off. His body fell.

Sighing, Asahi’s body began to sag. “Why can’t you just leave the Swan’s alone?”

"Yay way to go" Jacub chwrd and me but then he got all scared all of a sudden! "Rebecca look at the scene!" he said trying to warn me! I looked back and there was the head! It was floating and being!

“Floatin’ heads. Such an inconvenience,” Cherry yawned. 

"WHAT!? BUT I KILLED YOU!" I SCREAMED

"you did not kill me hard enough fool" he sed and then tore my dress in half with his zombie toeth. "Besides before I die I have to tell you the secret of what Esme is going to kill you with!" he scremed

“Why would you tell her that?” Briar asked. “Keep it a secret, don’t make it harder for Esme to kill her.”

“But that would be smart, and TwilightRova is incapable of writing a smart character,” Asahi explained.

 so then I stopped trying to kill him to listen. If he had disciplined earlier none of this would have ever happened it was all fucking chadley's fault!

His eyes went back to the screen and his brows furrowed. “She always I a professional at shifting the blame.”

“It’s quite a talent,” Cherry agreed.

"what" I sed huffing expectantly

"Esme is going to mutate the town using radio waves from the radio station! And if you do not stop her than she is going to nuke everything!"

“Mutate the town, then nuke everything?” Briar asked, trying to follow the logic, but trying to cut metal with a feather would be an easier task. “What point is there in mutating a town if you’ll just nuke it all after? That’s an unnecessary step.”

 then he finished and opened a portal and flew his head in and then the portal closed as I called him a fucker because right now hes being one goddamit.

"We have to fight aggrsively Esme will mutate the entire town if we do not stop the radio from spreading! She has the nuke and she will use it if we lose!" Alicai said taking out her gun. Tanishashanqua also took out her gun Jacub took out his ax and Edowerd his nales as the Crusdaer Crew got ready for battle.

“So, Edward is suddenly in the clear, now?” Cherry asked, tilting her head as she subjected herself to torment by rereading the text. “Did I miss an apology or explanation?”

“Nah, she got tired of shitting on him,” Asahi said.

 We left the store but before that I all got my dance dress on because the chaser was dead wich meant free clothes!

“So now you’re shoplifting,” Cherry frowned. “You’re not even tryin’ to pretend to be good, now, are you?”

“She really has nosedived down,” Asahi agreed.

When we got to the outside Esme was flying in the air. The sky was green from the radio's waves. Rose was flying too because she can be a fucking bitch.

"SUCK ON MY VOLCAN BAKEMEAT REBECA YOU SHIT MUFIN" Esme sop and Rose confom it

“Volcan… bakemeat?” Asahi repeated, sounding out the words as if they were a foreign language. “I… what?”

“Is she just trying to say; ‘suck on my dick’?” Briar asked.

That's when her army of zombies appeared and shit went residint evil on us the zombies were under esme's control so when she told them to attack they listened.

Cherry groaned and resumed tugging on her hair. “She is going to make me despise Resident Evil, ain’t she?”

“Probably,” Asahi confirmed, earning another whine from her.

 Anya the bold and serkades were there too. But you know what fuck this shit I'm tired of these fuockers.

"FUCK YOU" I said as I took out my katana and cut off anyas head because guess what IM TRIED OF YOU RUNNING MY STORY WITH YOUR BAD INFLICTS ON EVERTHING GO BACK TO TH WHOLE YOU CLIMBED FROM!

“Of course, that’s the mature response to not liking someone’s attempts to do their job, because you are such a mature person,” Briar said, her tone robotic to mask just how exhausted she was becoming from reading all of this.

“You’re tired of them?” Asahi asked and waved his hand at himself and the girls. “We’re tired of your shit.”

Then I saw serkades but it was fine because Edowedr chopped his dick off with a chainsad they got from alicai.

“Who the absolute fuck is Serkades?” Cherry demanded. “Please, God, someone tell me who the fuck that is supposed to be!”

“It doesn’t matter anymore, I suppose, seeing as he’s dead,” Briar said, attempting a modicum of comfort.

Not that it helped. Cherry began tugging on her pigtail even harder. “That makes it worse! He died an’ I have no idea who he is, and it’s drivin’ me crazy!”

"that is is Esme, Rebecca, we cannot die" I was told but there was too much fighting I culdnt tell who sed it. Whoever they are they were right. I took a gun from serkades because drug dealers have guns and shot it at Esme but her shield pooped up and she burned the shot to the ground! I fell distressed and dazzled because what the fuock can I even do in this situation.

“You can die. That’s still an option,” Asahi pointed out. “That is the ideal option, in fact.”

"REBECCA!" Jacub shouted from afar "I BELIEVE IN YOU!" and with that I was better. Alicai my friend came running towards me wile Jacub and Tanishahsanqua fought zombies and shit.

"To defeat her you need to rock the fuck out" alicai told me as she handed me a rocking electic gitar made out of diamond from mars all for an awesome solo wile she took out an expensiv blood-ruby encrusted gold fiddle and got ready to fuck the rock out of me.

Cherry blinked, opened her mouth, closed it, and waited a few seconds before trying aain. “I’m sorry? What?” she said, struggling just to get those words out. “Did this turn into a fiddle contest with the Devil? What is this, Georgia?”

"take this… it is… a jew!"

“A Jew?” Briar asked.

“A Jew,” Asahi confirmed.

Neither really understood it, or why it was a Jew. But apparently it was a Jew.

 I looked at esme in the sky and punked the fuck out. We busted into a song that pursed the heavens of everything it had and bellowed to hell itself and then the core of the planet causing the molten iron in it to rush out like a Vulcan and bake the fucking shit off of esme's face which it did. The earth shattered in half braking apokalypticly because of my beautiful lyrics.

“Destroying the world isn’t really a good thing,” Briar frowned. “Though, nothing you do is necessarily good, so this fits right in with the rest of your actions.”

"AAARRRGGGHHH REBECCA!"

"YES!?" I screemed to esme who was being fired and burned by the firey hot magma of my sin

“Finally ya admit you’re a filthy sinner like the rest of us,” Cherry laughed.

“Don’t lump her in with us,” Asahi growled, hitting her on the shoulder. “She is far, far worse.”

"FUCK YOU" she screemd and then teleported away but Rose didn't she got caught in the flames of ym torture and then the olten iron became a hand which dragged her down into hell.

"REBECCA SAVE ME" she screemed so I stopped my solo but it was too late Rossey was sicked into a molten spicy hellish land that is pretty bad but not as bad as what goes on in my heart mot of the time. Fuck you if you don't thnk Rebecca is deep.

“Fuck me, I guess,” Asahi sighed, looking up at the ceiling in desperate hope for some form of salvation, but found none. There would never be any no matter how hard and often he looked.

Cherry stuck out her tongue. “Becca is about as deep as a post-sprinkle puddle.”

Anyways after that we went home because seriously I was fucking done with everything today my dress was burned clarty was a piloted and angela was on the moon and now rossey's in fuckign hell which is just bad but I secretly thinks that she deserves it.

“Just continue to rack up those ‘good person’ points, at this rate you’ll be in Hell’s V.I.P. section before long,” Asahi said, making a motion of writing a tally in the air. “Though, let’s be honest, Hell is a vacation day for you.”

As he said that, the text began scrolling as chapter 32 – prom shown on the screen. Before it could get much further, Cherry stood up and shimmied out into the main aisles. “I need a break,” she declared, massaging her scalp. “My head’s startin’ to really hurt.”

Looking over his shoulder, Asahi rolled his eyes. “Considering you kept tugging at your hair, it’s no wonder your head hurts,” he chided, his voice void of any sympathy for her plight. “Stop using your pigtails as stress ropes and you might not have a headache. I’m surprise you’re not bald yet withal that pulling.”

“Says the guy who’s the reason I’m gonna go home with a bruised arm an side,” Cherry bit back, though there was no real venom to it as she pushed open the doors. “I’m getting some ice, see if that’ll help the pain go away. Y’all best get your asses up and out here if you want anything, too.”

Briar shrugged, slowly rising from her seat. “I could do for some movement,” she said, and as she got out into the aisles to walk, Asahi followed after, making a beeline for the restrooms.

These breaks never lasted long, but they were nice, brief respites to have.

[whirea]

Something here too now!

So I´m just posting here the things I´ve posted on SpaceHey, so enjoy the read! Also, I´ll prob start posting story stuff on here so cya!

So hi! Finally posting something haha. So I've been writing a story in secret for years now, I haven't rlly shown anyone only some small parts on my Instagram. But today I decided to share it here, I'm sick rn so kinda delusional from pure pain but oh well. Note please that I ain't anything good, I just write :'D Also, any criticism is welcomed! This is is a small part of one of my characters backstories (I rlly like to write backstories A LOT). His name is Kasai Funka and he is the ig main character (although you can also say I have like 10 main characters because I just can't choose-) and he is my baby boy. Anyway enjoy this little part of his story! 

"When he was 6, he and his parents were driving a car to go on vacation to the seaside where they had a beach house. But the car started to twitch for unknown reasons (later his father learned that the brakes were tampered with and there was also a bomb under the car, classic), and before the car drove off the cliff the car exploded. Kasais father was able to keep the explosion at bay, but the impact pushed Kasai off the cliff. Kasais mother switched places with Kasai and then got impaled by a spiked rock. Kasai saw his mother getting impaled."

Now I'll forget that I posted this because it's hella embarrassing, love u and hope you are having a good day or night <3

Me here again sharing a snippet about one of my characters! Hope ya all been well <3

On today's block is Amari Ammar, one of my many lesbian icons (she´s taken, so back off-)! She can be a sweet little ray of sunshine or the devil's right hand, you pick your poison :3 If ya want a clearer picture of her go listen to "Harley Fucking Quinn" and come back!

And here´s that snippet from her past:

"She was walking around in the woods like she liked to do, it was quiet and calm, and she felt safe. Amari noticed a little bird at the side of the road, the little thing's wing was broken, and it seemed it was also sick from an illness because its breathing was slow but heavy. Amari picked up the poor thing and wished to help it, but she knew she couldn´t. She wanted to end its suffering like she did with her mother. If she held on hard enough, she could end its pain. It was easy, she had done it once before."

You can make your own conclusion if she turns out to be good or bad or even something more <3 I´m currently rewriting her story so I´m not sure what will happen to her either lol

Anywho, I´ll leave now and let ya chill, love you <33

And that´s all for now, love you and see you who knows when!

[monarchisms]

thanks for the request, anon! ♡ 【☢️】

[thespoonisvictory]

Top Ten Most Wilbur Streams Ever:

rules: no dsmp lore streams, no music streams. I also tried to pick one from each ‘category’ of wilbur streams.

10. ‘If Niki Laughs the Stream Ends’ - feat. Niki

I showed extreme self-restraint in not adding more Niki-Wilbur solo streams. Anyway, this is the most enjoyable Wilbur ylyl vod, and one of the best of the Niki-Wilbur chill content genre. Besides their great chemistry, the Shawty bit is one of my favorites from the chat, and Niki losing it at the dumbest videos is just really enjoyable.

9. ‘mcc 12 - How long can I go without saying 'Gogy' ‘- feat. TapL, Phil, George

This team got first place four games in a row, had everyone in the top ten at one point, and looked great doing it. Wilbur’s chemistry with TapL and George despite having not made much content with them is off the charts, and it’s generally just such a fun vod to watch. Not only that, but their complete dominance and ease in so many games make this a really satisfying pov to watch, making this a rare vod where the gameplay and jokes are both at the top of their game. their communication and morale and skills and insane battle box comeback make this vod my favorite mcc team for Wilbur.

8. ‘Ultimate Chicken Horse (Post-nap stream)’ - feat. Niki, Fundy, Phil, and Tommy

Just a good time. Peak early dream smp content groups where people were just trying different dynamics out. Fundy shrieking when he died, everyone doing so poorly. They spend twenty minutes at the beginning trying to get Tommy to leave so Niki can play, some random dude accidentally joins. Cinema.

7. ‘Text-To-Speech Mediashare’ - feat. Phil’s assistance

Chaotic energy in the year of our lord 2020. The premise is simple: typing in chat activates a voice command, such as the word “clap” producing a clapping sound. This, as you can imagine, goes horribly, and breaks several times, while generally being overwhelming. At one point, Wilbur thinks he broke the entirety of twitch. This is where the clip of him reacting to the pigeon’s head coming off is from, it’s top tier.

6. ‘Minecraft 100 Player Lab Rat Experiment’ - feat. Technoblade

Definitely the best 100p in stream format, although I prefer the edited videos of some others, which is what keeps the moles and birds stream off this list. This is peak techbur content, what more can I say. uhhhh the techno burning his hand story makes me laugh every time I hear it, give it a watch.

5. ‘drunk geoguessr and minecraft with Niki, Fundy’ - feat. Fundy, Tubbo, Niki, Jack

Literally does “drunk christmas eve stream with dream smp gang” need more explanation? Drunk mamma mia!! Drunk geoguessr! Wilbur gives a giant sappy rant about how he loves his audience! Tubbo accidentally making Wilbur and Jack chug a ton of vodka is a highlight, but the whole stream just has a bubbly chaotic energy that really bottled the late 2020 dream smp vibes. 

4. 'It's time for monopoly‘- feat. Niki, Minx

It is a three-hour vod of actually playing monopoly and it is the funniest gameplay of it I’ve seen in my life. Minx doesn’t know how to play monopoly and struggles the entire time, yet somehow, she’s winning for a majority of it. It’s the most shit-talky we’ve ever seen Wilbur be. featuring bits such as ‘Pussy so good gotta put it in jail- uh’, ‘it’s free parking you stupid bitch’, Minx taking so long on her turns that Wilbur starts timing them, and Minx trying to think of warm places to go and only being able to think of Spain. Wilbur comes from behind to win the whole thing through psychological warfare, Minx loses her shit. Iconic. It’s one of those streams where the full three-hour experience is needed to feel the relief when Wilbur wins, and yet it doesn’t drag at all.

3. LAST HOUSE STREAM Short fun improv n that with Jack and Tommy - feat. Jack, Tommy

This is Wilbur’s funniest stream. Ever. I’ve watched it like five times and it still makes me laugh hysterically, it’s the peak of crimeboys humor. While everyone has their favorite bits, there’s really not a bad one, but finding out that Tommy does a great Karen accent and Jack and Wilbur rping distraught girlfriends are highlights. It’s just. So funny. Watch it.

2. skyblock randomizer finale - feat. my tears

I don’t think the vod even exists anymore, but the edited video does. It’s notorious for making people cry, and for good reason. I talk about it more here, but what made this series so unique was Wilbur’s ability to carry a story entirely solo, in such a solitary and empty environment. It shows how simple it is for people to get attached to things, for them to build a home and find things to love, and it’s all over a pixelated fish.

1. Quackity Wine Stream - feat. Quackity, George

It’s all fresh in our minds, so I’m sure I don’t have to recap too much, but this is easily the best of the “Wilbur is rambling freely about whatever topic comes to mind” streams that actually exist on Wilbur’s channel. Wilbur and Quackity have amazing chemistry and just have really candid conversations about their friendship and content creation as a whole, once they get started there’s not really a moment of uninteresting discussion. Plus, the fact that they’re getting progressively more drunk is an added bonus, also Wilbur’s beret is really cute. Who knows if it’ll stay my favorite as time passes but it is rn

[littlemisslipbalm]

I live in the neighbourhood

When Y/N moved to Hampstead she was unaware of the implications the decision would have on the course of the rest of her life.

or

Harry is Y/N’s eccentric neighbour who sweeps her up in the whirlwind that is his life

this gif bc its maybe my favorite clip of him EVER holy fuck - this is the harry of my dreams this is the harry of i live in the neighbourhood

HEY YALL it’s been a minute and I missed yall so much and I’m just about to be on break so maybe i’ll be back to posting writing regularly but with school its so hard and I think I’ve been working on this for months so yeah <3 lol PLS PLS PLS leave me feedback and reblogs and that stuff bc otherwise my writing just feels...empty and you have no idea the smile i get when even just the tags say like “god this was everything” it can be anything honestly but it keeps my passion up. Thank you again and hope you enjoy.

Word Count: ~10k | Warnings: swearing probably? no smut (yet), rich and famous harry - mentions of Taylor Swif 

-

She considered herself an average young woman in her mid twenties. She liked screaming Taylor Swift and Megan Thee Stallion songs alone in her car and thrifting on weekends. She hated cable because of commercials and when doordash didn’t deliver all of her order. She had asthma when she worked out or the air quality was bad. She had dumb celebrity crushes that her friends and her still laughed over with every new instagram post. She had hopes and dreams she had yet to achieve and she had past trauma that many would never know about, especially at first glance.

Sure, she was successful. She would admit that. How else would she be able to afford even the modest little house she had found in Hampstead? She had studied international business in college and hopped on a plane to London the first chance she got. After a few years of a more than decent paycheck and an advantageous stimulus check from her kind parents, she was able to move out of her starter flat into the suburbs. The definitive push for the move was two-fold. Her parents wanted her to take her dog and her apartment complex was strict on no pets. Then her promotion at work - which included a pay raise - made it hard to wave off taking full ownership of her childhood ten-pound best friend.

So with life happening as it usually does, Y/N first found herself scouring Zillow, then touring homes in the area, and finally standing outside a three bedroom, two bath, two-story cream house in Hampstead. Her house.

The little moving truck she had rented sat beside her as she stared at her future. The realtor had told her they would be there in ten minutes. For the next ten minutes all Y/N had to do was keep herself from combusting, or worse, sobbing.

She felt overwhelmed already. Renting a flat in London was one way to describe herself as independent. Owning a home in Hampstead seemed like a whole new level of adulthood she wasn’t sure if she was prepared for.

After taking a few deep breaths to ground herself, Y/N walked up to the gate that kept her front yard narrowly separated from the sidewalk. She lifted one hand from beneath the box she clutched tightly to her chest to push past the iron-rod gateway. The garden was cute, a little bland, and she thought to herself that maybe she’d develop some gardening skills now that she had her own front yard. The thought made her smile a little, refraining from laughing aloud while on her lonesome, since she had never taken interest in gardening before. But this house. This house. It was a new beginning. It was a fucking unwritten journal. Blank film. Unknown territory. She could be anyone in this house.

She gently placed the cardboard box on the first step up to the front door. There was no porch, but she couldn’t complain. It was gorgeous and she was lucky to get it at the price she did. The house was cream with dark blue accents and a grey shingled roof. Lots of windows. It was classic and it was hers.

After the realtor came with her keys and made sure everything seemed alright, Y/N’s couple of friends, Amélie and Daniel, arrived with their cars filled with items she had needed picking up from various stores. They helped her move her stuff into the house. Thankfully it was already half furnished, meaning she didn’t have to go out and buy beds or couches or any of those big items that are both expensive and a hassle to deal with.

By the time the evening had rolled around, everything was in the house and it actually seemed semi put together. Y/N looked around, sweat apparent on her face and hands on her hips, proud of what she had accomplished. The nerves from earlier had been drowned by pride.

-

The next day, she woke up from her first night in the house. It felt like a dream even though she was sure she was awake.  

She had to navigate her way to the airport today to pick up her dog from his long flight and then mainly settle into the house. Her house sat on Sherwood Avenue, one of the many streets in Hampstead. It’s neighboring houses were much larger. The ones directly next to and across from her weren’t drastically bigger but what she had yet to learn was that next to the house across from her there were two houses that had been joined together by their slightly eccentric owner. A man who would be the match that ignited the flame that was the rest of her life.

This unknown fact quickly became known after Y/N’s first few weeks in her new neighbourhood. The eccentric - more so absurdly rich - neighbor who conjoined the houses was Harry Styles.

The first time they crossed paths she wasn’t even aware of it. It was the day she moved in. He had been out for his usual morning run and was rounding the corner when she had pulled up in her moving van. Once inside his home, he snoopily watched on as his neighbour began to move in. He hadn’t taken note of much about her, just that she was new and that she had a nice pair of jeans on that day.

The second time, Y/N was convinced she needed to get her eyes checked because there was no way that she had just seen Harry Styles key himself into the house across the way from her. There was no way that she had moved into the same area as him, let alone the same street. It seemed far more plausible that she needed a psych evaluation or a strong glasses prescription.

But the third instance of them crossing paths, she was proven wrong. She was on her way back from the neighbourhood park when she saw a guy jogging towards her. With a yellow beanie and a black Columbia sweatshirt paired with running shorts and shoes, he was hard to ignore running straight towards her. The iconic curls, strong jawline, and soft green eyes were dead giveaways this time. After making brief eye contact as their paths literally crossed, she felt herself make a little face of odd interest. Her head quirked and her eyes narrowed, lips pursed with slight confusion. That was definitely him.

After that, she found herself seeing Harry around the neighbourhood a relatively good amount. She’d see him at the park, at the coffee shop, on their street, and more. They didn’t speak. She really didn’t think he would want to be bothered by his neighbours and she certainly wasn’t willing to test the theory. They sometimes gave a small smile of acknowledgement but nothing really friendly. Just ‘you exist and I know that’.

-

Fridays are Y/N’s favorite day. It’s the beginning of the weekend, she never has to go into work and it’s simply a nice day. People are happier, they smile brighter and it just seems like the world is a little better than usual.

Friday was especially amazing today because her childhood best friend, Cate, was arriving at London Heathrow in the evening. Y/N had begged Cate to fly out to see the new house in person and Cate had finally found the time to run away to England for a week.

She shut her front door carefully behind her and placed her headphones in her ears. Rori, that little terrier, who had made a similar flight to see Y/N’s place not too long ago, scampered out the door with her and jumped happily at her legs as she fiddled with her phone. Her coat ruffles around her disturbed from the morning air. It’s blanket-like fabric that consisted of a deep blue backdrop with felt giraffes sewn on it, kept her warm while she walked. With her mind racing with weekend plans and ideas for her and Cate to do both in Hampstead and the city, she crossed the street like usual and began to walk with her dog to the coffee shop for her morning tea.

Unlike usual, she fumbled just as she was putting her phone in her pocket and bumped into something large and definitely not sedentary.

“I’m so sorry!” She blushed and moved backwards from the man who had just been shutting his own front gate to head somewhere.

“S’alright. No harm, no foul.” He looks down at her and her dog. Rori seems excited by the stranger and sniffs him eagerly. A single paw prodding at the man’s long leg.

She grimaces, hearing the voice and stepping back allows her to fully recognize who she had just bumped into. Her neighbour. The runner. Harry Styles.

“Sorry.” She mutters again as Rori continues to prod at Harry’s leg.

She tries to coax Rori away, but Harry simply smiles and leans down to the small dog.

“Hi there buddy,” he coos and rubs the top of the fluffy dogs head, in between his pointy ears, “What’s your name?”

“Rori.” She states easily, Harry’s eyes flickering to her smoothly. Rori makes a smile babbling noise that sounds a bit like a tiny roar - hence the name - and Harry chuckles to himself.

“He’s really adorable,” he finally says and straightens up from his admiring of the dog.

The grimace becomes more of a smile on her face and she mumbles a “Thank You”.

As her neighbour - who hasn’t introduced himself (which wasn’t necessary, but still) or bothered to ask for her introduction - seems to be about to say something new when his phone begins to vibrate obnoxiously. He twitches, his large hands immediately going to his pockets for the important device. He checks the message and looks back at her face.

“Sorry, I have to run...um,” he’s not sure what to say. He really does have to go, but he doesn’t even know his neighbour’s name. He’ll have to make sure to get it at some point in the near future. Especially now that he’s acquainted with her dog.

“No worries,” she smiles completely this time, relieved for the whole interaction to be over. She felt like she was going to explode with each passing moment. In the presence of a legendary musician, c’mon, who wouldn’t be freaking out. All she could think about was how Harry Styles now knew her dog’s name. What the fuck!

-

Upon arriving at the airport, she waited patiently for Cate to walk out of the customs area.

When she did, the two young women began jumping up and down excitedly, Y/N squealing only slightly. They hugged and began chattering intensely, catching up on lost time that generally occurs when you live an ocean apart.  

Finally, one comment rings through the constant back and forth and Cate stops.

“Wait, what did you just say,” she questions as they begin walking to catch an uber back to Hampstead.

“I think my house might be haunted?” Y/N’s voice raising because she’s unsure if that’s what Cate was talking about.

“No, no, the thing after that. I think I must’ve misheard you.”

“Harry Styles is my neighbour?” Y/N’s brows raise as she looks over at her best friend, curious to know what she will say.

“Yes! Explain. Now!”

“It’s not really a big deal. It’s a nice neighbourhood, it makes sense that celebrities of his caliber want to live there.”

“That is not explaining. You have to introduce us!”

As they climb into their uber and settle in for the short ride back to Hampstead, Y/N sighs and tells Cate everything she knows.

“We’ve only just spoken today and I’ve been here for a couple weeks. He lives across the street and down one, I guess. I just see him around, it’s not like he knows who I am. He didn’t even get my name today, just Rori’s.” She laughs lightly, still finding it funny that Harry knows her dog’s name.

Cate nods, leaning in slightly to her best friend, hardly able to contain her awestruckness from the story and baffledness at Y/N’s calmness. “So, like, when do I get to meet him?”

“Girl, I don’t fucking know. Never, if you’re going to act wild. I don’t want the neighbourhood to think I’m not chill.”

“Sometimes…” Cate starts and leans away from Y/N jokingly, “I hate you.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.”

They both smile, bumping elbows silently. The song on the radio fading in louder as their words die out.

-

The next day, Y/N took Cate to the local park. It was expansive and connected to the football fields that local teams would play at. The park section was a luscious green that was maintained with copious amounts of watering by the township.

She and Cate settled on a patch of grass near a slender tree that would offer some shade if the sun’s rays became too harsh. The quilt they sat on was something her grandmother had made her when she was maybe 8 years old, meaning it was torn in places and completely worn in a different shade of pink than it had been initially.

They set up their picnic and played music, enjoying the sunny day. Something rare and fleeting as the fall began to creep up on Hampstead.

They eat and catch up on life for about an hour. Basking in the sunlight, Y/N had laid on her back and was staring up at the clouds passing along the sky. Cate was carefully watching their surroundings, simply taking in her friend’s new home, but possibly for another reason too.

“Hey, isn’t that…” Cate trails off, trying to subtly nod in the direction of an approaching figure.

Y/N sits up, her hands holding her up from behind her. Her hair fails in front of her shoulders slightly and it’s a little disheveled from being mused in the grass. She looks discreetly in the direction of Cate’s nodding and then looks at her friend and rolls her eyes.

“Yes, but don’t say anything, he might not even notice me and I’m certainly not calling out to him.”

‘Illicit Affairs’ by Taylor Swift is playing off her speaker and as she’s about to change it, Cate turns it up slightly. They share a glare with one another before trying to act casual again, even though both of their eyes kept flickering to the man who seemed to be continuing closer and closer to their set up.

It became clear that Harry was approaching them after all and Y/N tried to carry on an unbothered conversation with Cate, which was hard with the constant nudging of Cate’s foot on her shin.

He stops a mere foot away from their blanket, beaming at the two young women lounging on the ground. He makes an attempt at a casual wave, his large hand splaying his fingers quickly, before opening his mouth to speak.

Cate beats him to the punch. “Hello there!”

“Erm, hi!” He says nicely to her and then looks at Y/N.

“No Rori today?” He inquires.

“No,” she smiles, slightly blushing at the fact that he remembered her and her dog. “He’s napping.”

“Ah, I see,” He pauses, “I feel like I need to apologize.” He continues.

“For what?” She questions and Cate watches on anxiously, mesmerized by Harry and dying to see what happens next.

“I ran off before I could even ask for your name or introduce myself. It was terribly rude.”

“Oh,” she can’t stop smiling, “It’s nothing to apologize for, I’m sure you’re busy. Besides I had to get my day started, otherwise I would’ve been late picking her up.” She points to Cate who smiles sheepishly, still internally screaming over the fact that her friend is able to talk so easily to a celebrity.

Harry nods and looks at Cate again, “Just visiting I take it then?”

She nods quickly, words escaping her. Y/N chuckles under her breath and swoops in to save her friend any embarrassment. “Cate’s my best friend and she’s been kind enough to take time out of her extremely busy life to come look at my new house.”

He hums, still standing a respectful distance from their set-up. “Nice to meet you, Cate,” he says very kindly. Then he laughs, but in a way that is like he’s beside himself. The two women both quirk their heads at him. Y/N squints her eyes slightly, trying to understand the guy she is talking to and connecting him with the man that is all over the news all of the time for his musical genius.

“Now I know your dog and best friend’s names but still not yours. At this point, I’m begging you to tell me.”

They all laugh and Y/N feels nervous for the first time since Harry had walked up.

“You first,” she smiles slyly.

His eyes widen slightly in surprise, but then go back to normal. Harry was very smart, she likely knew his name, but one, she was trying to be funny and two, she was also trying to be courteous. He preferred to introduce himself rather than just be told who he is, even if people already knew. It allowed him to maintain some normalcy.

“‘M Harry,” He says with a smile.

“Alright.” She says and then remains quiet.

Harry’s lips quirk up in a faint smile, amused at her expression.

“I thought it was a ‘show me yours and I’ll show you mine’ type of situation or was I mistaken?” He finally asks when she remains silent still.

The two young women laugh and Y/N bites the inside of her cheek, both feeling flustered and completely in control at the same time.

“You weren’t mistaken, I was just thinking.” Then she pauses again and Cate thinks Harry is about to combust and Harry thinks he’s going to as well with all the anticipation that has been built up over his neighbor’s name, even though he was pretty sure he’d heard it in passing at one point or another but had forgotten quickly afterwards.

“It’s Y/N.”

Harry releases a facetious sigh of relief, “Oh thank god! Finally!” His words quickly turn into an infectious laugh that is paired with a shining smile and she feels like she’s swooning right then and there. The control has gone out the window and she’s taken with her neighbor. He’s wonderful in that moment and she forgets about Cate or the park or anything. It’s just Harry and how it seems like he’s smiling just for her.

“Now that I’ve gotten your name,” he smiles pointedly at her after his laughter has faded away. The smile doesn’t leave his face though, his eyes still crinkled, his dimples still showing.

She nods, encouraging him to continue. Cate feels like she’s watching a movie unfold in front of her and she wishes she could record the entire interaction.

“I can finally ask you, Y/N, where did you get that fabulous coat I saw you wearing yesterday?”

She twitches further upright, eyes bringing themselves directly inline with Harry’s gaze. “Oh,” she inhales, “The giraffe one, yeah?”

He nods.

“I got it from a Goodwill years ago. It’s some vintage company that used to only make sleepwear. I looked up the tag one time and it doesn’t exist anymore. Super cool, though. Wish I could buy more.”

“Yeah,” Harry says eagerly, even taking a step towards the women, “It was so intriguing. Maybe, if you didn’t mind of course -” he falters, losing his courage for a moment, “you could bring it over and my stylist could check it out. I would love something similar and I’m sure he could figure it out.”

She shrugs. It wasn’t crazy, especially not for Harry - she assumed. She was certain he often found things he liked but there was only one of them so he would just order his own. She couldn’t help the pride that was swelling inside her though it that moment. Harry Styles liking her jacket so much he asked where it was from and then wanting his stylist to look at it. She’d jump for joy when she was in the safety of her private home later tonight with Cate.

“One condition,” she says and Harry’s brows quirk amusedly at her.

“You are a very tit for tat person,” he muses.

“Fair’s fair,” she shrugs again and then looks around her quickly, “It’s simple so don’t get too worked up over it, buddy.”

He laughs slightly again and tries to figure out what she’s looking for. When she extends a scratched up, sticker-covered point and shoot film camera he smiles.

“Can you take a picture of Cate and I? It’s always just the two of us so we never have anyone to take pictures of us together.”

Harry grins at this and her sincere face. Cate is a little taken aback, because while it’s technically true, it’s not entirely factual. They have plenty of film pictures of them - maybe not recently though. And she wasn’t going to question Y/N right now. It seemed like she knew what she was doing.

Harry takes the camera and begins to look through the viewfinder. The women scoot closer together and Cate wraps her arm around Y/N’s shoulder. She leans in to press her cheek against her best friend. They smile up at the camera and Harry crouches slightly to get a better angle.

“Alright,” he mumbles, “Ready?...Cheese!”

Their smiles stay hung on their face as they listen for the click and when the faint sound befalls their ears, Cate laughs and Y/N pulls away. She reaches forward for the camera, her hand easily brushing Harry’s large one.

Their smiles meet each other and Cate can’t help but notice how they grow as the two of them look at one another.

“Thank you,” Y/N says sweetly and pulls back to retake her seat on the blanket.

Harry straightens up, his grin falling back into that signature smirk. “No problem.”

“So-” He begins but she cuts him off.

“Well, I’m sure I’ll see you around, yeah?”

He clears his throat, feeling thrown off. “Yeah, sure. I guess next time I see you we can talk about when a good time would be for your jacket to come over?”

His voice raises at the end of his question a little more than usual, he’s trying to get her to bite, but she doesn’t seem like someone who is easily thrown off. He is trying to read her and she’s been completely cool the entire time. It’s intriguing. Even more so than the jacket, even though he’d be lying if he said he didn’t like it, it wasn’t really his focus when he walked across the park to her and Cate.

“Yep! It was nice finally meeting you Harry.”

He feels the cue to walk off and says his farewells. As he walks off, back on course to his intended destination, his head is filled with questions. Most important of them being when he would see her again.

Cate and Y/N watch him walk towards the football fields. They see him meet with a group of men and it seems like they’re there to practice or play a game. Y/N couldn’t be sure.

“He likes you!” Cate finally bursts out.

Y/N rolls her eyes, “Stop trying to make me take the piss. That’s a fucking lie and you know it.”

“It’s not! He likes you and you obviously like him, I mean, but we been knew.”

“Having a crush on the famous Harry Styles when you’re 17 is different than me liking my neighbour Harry.”

“But you like him don’t you? He’s even better than he was when he was 19. Now he’s all grown up and established and more your style anyway.”

“Shut up! He could hear you.”

“He really couldn't, he's yards away, you’re just paranoid.” Cate continues to tease and ridicule her best friend over Harry and Y/N is just about ready to up and leave, but she also can’t help but laugh it off.

“I’m literally gonna kick you out if you keep talking,” Y/N says between laughs and the women feel like they’re back in high school losing their minds over the stupidest joke ever.

“Okay, fine. But all I have to say is I will hold this over you when you end up together.”

“Yeah, yeah. Sure, whatever. Just be prepared to wait forever because I can promise you Harry Styles and I are never ending up together.”

--

Two Weeks Later

Y/N walked to her door after hearing the doorbell ring and opened it to find her neighbour standing with his arm raised ready to knock.

“Hey, Harry,” She greeted easily, but not entirely sure why he was here.

They hadn’t really seen each other since their official meeting in the park. It hadn’t bothered her and it hadn’t really bothered Harry either. It seemed like they both had extremely busy lives that they didn’t plan on throwing out the window because they had said they would meet up at some point. She liked that.

Harry had come over because he finally had a break in his schedule and was hoping to talk about the jacket and anything else really. He was interested in getting to know her and he didn’t care to hide it.

“I was wondering if you wanted to go get a coffee or something?” He asked, leaning himself against her door frame now.

Her eyebrows raise and her eyes widen a little bit, not completely sure she heard him correctly.

“Right now?!” She asked incredulously.

She was wearing an oversized grey sweatshirt and black bike shorts that peaked out from underneath the sweatshirt hem. One of her socks was shoved around her ankle while the other was pulled up flat to touch the base of her calf. She didn’t think she was looking the most presentable at the moment. She had been basking in her day off by simply laying on the couch watching hours of Netflix.

He nods, his smile growing on his face. Her flustered expression only made him happier. She was always so nonchalant with him, he wanted to see her a little more antsy.

“Unless you’re busy,” he adds seriously, not wanting to bother her, just wanting to spend time with her.

“No, no. I’m not...I’m not busy. I just wasn’t expecting any plans where I would be required to go out in public. Let me just...um, come inside and then give me five minutes.”

“Sure,” Harry smiles again as he steps into her home.

Her smile is sheepish and much less genuine then the one Harry holds on his face as he takes in her abode. She tells him to make himself comfortable and then runs to her room to try and possibly fix her state in under five minutes.

She tears around her room, heaving off the frumpy sweatshirt and grabbing a long sleeve striped v-neck top she had hanging out half out of her hamper, a sign known to her that while it was clean enough to wear, if she happened to do laundry she should wash it. Slipping it over her head, she walks to her dresser and leans over to open the bottom drawer and unfolds a pair of dark wash oversized jeans. There’s no holes in them and she throws them on the bed so that she can slip out of her current pants. Next, onto the socks, she swaps out the current ones for a fresh black pair and finds her tortoise print boots to flick on. As she just about runs into her en suite bathroom, she zips the two boots up between steps. A quick comb through her hair, deodorant, two spritz of perfume, her eyelash curler and mascara and she’s running back to where Harry is waiting in her living room.

He blinks surprisedly at her promptness, usually giving people more time then what they say they need. She had indeed gotten ready in five minutes. He thought she looked breathtaking. And she felt like she was at a lack for breath in any case.

“It’s a bit cold out,” he glances to the window.

“Isn’t it always?” She smiles, finally catching her breath.

He chuckles and then nods, a smile appearing on his face as he feels a warmth in his chest at her wit.

“Ready?” He checks in.

She nods, grabbing a coat she kept hung by the door.

“Just the coffee shop down the way?” She inquires as they exit the house and she locks the door behind her.

Harry hums, waiting down a step for her to turn around and walk beside him. It was so strange to her, this felt all too normal with him. Like he was just a friend who had come to pick her up for coffee, her neighbor, nothing more.

“Did you hear the new season of the Crown is coming out soon?” Harry asks as they walk shoulder to shoulder (technically since her shoulder wasn’t in line with his).

“Really?” She looks at him, “I love that show!”

“Me too,” He looks at her and smiles happily.

“That’s amazing,” she breathes mostly to herself, half about the show and half about how Harry watches television and that he watches one of her favorite shows.

There’s silence. The brisk air pricking their cheeks as they walk down their street. Their puffs of breath create a slight mist of white ahead of them and then quickly dissipates.

Her eyes flit up to Harry’s chiseled jaw and face and she watches him as his eyes carefully and meaningfully take in his surroundings. Was it her turn to take a stab at conversation? It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence but she just wasn’t sure what was going on.

“You play football right?” She says finally as they turn onto the next street that would bring them closer to the café they both frequented.

She remembered seeing him there on several occasions. The tips he left were always overly generous, which she assumed you could do when you were exorbitantly rich. He always smiled when he ordered and knew the baristas by name. His order rarely differed and she hated to admit but she knew his two regulars. His actual “regular” was a 12 ounce black coffee, dark roast, no cream and no sugar. The other, his “I’ll actually have”, was a 16 ounce iced green tea, no cream and no sugar.

She couldn’t help that she was observant and that when ‘H’ was called at the bar she looked at what was pushed out, patiently waiting for him to come snatch it up with a smile and nod to the workers before he left. Sometimes he’d even smile at her over the lid of his drink as he exited the establishment. It was warm and inviting and she felt good about the twinkle in his eye that never seemed to waver no matter the day.

Now they were going there together and she’d have to pretend like she’d never noticed what he got as a drink.

He responds to her question with another glance at her and a simple “yes”. His hands shove into his pockets and one side of his pink lips quirk up. He continues, “I’m on a local team with some mates. We’re in a little competition with our league. The final match is coming up this Sunday actually...You should come.”

He says it so casually it almost doesn’t catch her off guard. Harry inviting her to his football game, maybe this was going to be her life now. Going to her neighbours football match. Going to Harry Styles’ football match.

“Sunday…” She sounds out, choosing to look out into the distance instead of at him. “What time?”

“Eight.”

“P.M. right?” She responds quickly, worried since she never wakes up that early and rarely before 10 a.m. on the weekends for that matter.

“Of course,” he chuckles.

They’ve come upon the café and he’s quick to grab the handle to open the door and let her go before him. She can’t stop the blush and smile that spread on her face as she ducks her head into the warm and cozy shop. Men had opened doors for her before and she really thought of herself as a strong woman who didn’t need a man for anything, but something about Harry’s action felt especially, and specifically, chivalrous. Why, she had no idea.

Neither of them stop to look at the menu. They were regulars and they both knew that about each other as well. He gestures for her to go first and she mutters her thanks before turning to the patiently waiting barista. She orders and is about to hand over her card when Harry suavely steps in and says, “Don’t worry about it. I invited you with me, I’ll pay.”

It was both completely unexpected and expected at the same time. Knowing she’d never win this fight, she thanked him again, glanced at the man taking her order and then stepped aside. Harry orders his own drink and then pays for both. Today he leaves double the amount he usually leaves for tip, she assumes since it’s two drinks he was paying for.

“You didn’t have to do that, you know?” She says quietly to him once they’re in a corner of the café waiting for their drinks.

He stands slightly slumped against the wall, closer to her height right now. He only shrugs, his good natured smile not once leaving his face since he entered this place.

“I wanted to,” he said simply right as the drinks were ready since it wasn’t particularly busy on this random Friday afternoon.

They glance outside and see that it’s begun to drizzle while they’ve been inside. She sighs, having hoped to walk around a little after being inside all day.

Instead, they sit at the corner table in the café, across from each other. She moves on from the paying thing, knowing it was simply how this guy probably operated most of his life.

He got a black coffee today, the cold and rain likely contributing to that choice.

As one pop song fades out, slightly under the sound of the coffee machines, she’s about to tell Harry she’s pretty sure she can make his final football match when ‘Cardigan’ fades in. It’s the second time a Taylor Swift song has been playing while she’s been in the presence of Harry and they were conversing. She tries to ignore one of her favorite songs at the moment. Harry doesn’t seem to pay much mind to it. His foot is tapping against his other, but it’s been tapping like that since they sat down.

“I think I could probably make it to your game,” she says finally after a pause and a sip of her own drink.

Harry grins at the response and launches into how great it will be if they win and how happy everyone will be. She smiles along and doesn’t notice the slight head swaying to the song that she’s begun.

“Fan of Taylor?” Harry inquires and Y/N’s face drops, eyes widening cartoonishly.

She stutters, a nervous laugh leaving her mouth before she can actually say something. How does she respond about liking Taylor Swift to a man who counts her as an ex. She’s at a loss.

“Yeah, uh,” she finally starts.

Harry watches her curiously, obviously noticing her discomfort as his question.

“I used to not really consider myself a fan. I don’t really follow her just because I don’t really follow...um...musicians,” she chokes out the last word realizing Harry fits that category. “But, after folklore, I don’t know, this album really spoke to me. I also really like Lover and...uh” she pauses again, sticking on 1989, an album she has argued with her friends about how it’s basically a tell all of the man before her and Taylor’s relationship.

He nods, hoping she’ll continue. He wanted to get to know her and he kind of liked seeing her squirm. “1989?” He finally supplies.

Her blush isn’t able to be covered this time. If her hair didn’t fall in front of her ears she was sure they’d be flushed with blood.

Then she draws out of her own self stress and looks at the smooth man before her and grows calm. He was amazing at winding her up and she didn’t want to seem like some young, impressionable fangirl to him. So, she squared her shoulders and straightened up in her chair.

“Yes, it was pop perfection as one of my college friends liked to say. I’d always listen to it at the gym.” Then she pauses, taking a measured breath, gaining her confidence back. Her eyes meet his, “Is there any songs off it that you particularly enjoy, Mr. Styles.”

He chuckles, mostly because of her emphasis on ‘Style’.

“Shake it off?” He asks.

“Oh fuck off!” She laughs and he joins in with her.

When they catch their breaths from laughing, they simultaneously take sips of their drinks and settle their eyes back on one another. Exes and songs written about oneself weren’t exactly the topics Harry had in mind for the coffee outing he had asked Y/N out on, but talks of exes had never been this funny with anyone else. He was grateful for her playfulness, her demeanor.

“Can I ask you something personal?” She asks quietly and seriously.

“I think we’re past that question, love,” he responds.

“Yeah, I guess,” she pauses and just about whispers, “Pretty much all of them are about you right?”

He shrugs again, his felt coat rustling around his seat. “We never really talked about every single song.”

She leans forward at the ‘we’ Harry is using about himself and Taylor Swift.

“But when I listen to the songs, I hear us in just about every one but a few.”

“Wow,” she breathes and sips her drink. “I don’t know what I’d do if I lived through something that intense and then someone commemorated in a masterpiece.”

“Do you have a favorite on that album?” He asks, moving on from her revelation.

“I love ‘I know places’, it has a cool sound. But I also really love ‘Wonderland’. They both have kind of dark sounds, yet it still is like what you have is so special that the bad bits are worth it. I don’t know, it just seems like a tv show. I don’t think my life could ever be that crazy or dramatic.” She doesn’t notice her use of ‘you’ because she had meant it as a form of analyzing the song theoretically as she had done hundreds of times with her friends,  but this time the ‘you’ is literally the ‘you’ the song is talking about.

“Love can turn anyone’s life chaotic.” Harry muses.

The green eye’s that flashed at Taylor throughout that album look at Y/N from across the table and she feels a flip in her stomach at his tone.

Maybe he notices her mild discomfort, maybe that’s just who he is. But after a beat, Harry’s onto the next topic on his mind. He launches into how he’s just returned from Scotland for a shoot for something so undercover he can’t even divulge to her, much to his dismay. She’s taken aback since she didn’t consider her someone Harry would divulge any of his private matters to, but it seemed like he already considered her a confidant. Just not for that. He wants it to be a surprise.

She smiles and listens attentively. She wonders as he goes on about his interesting yet absurdly lavish life whether he even knows what regular life is like anymore. Or if he’d even enjoy it if he experienced it.

Sure, coffee and football were plenty part of regular life . But the football league was something novel to Harry. He had just gotten to do it and he was thrilled by its normalcy.

She regarded him carefully, unsure what the next step was in this budding friendship. Was it dangerous to get involved with someone’s life which seemed to be filled with whirlwind rigor and constant change.

She liked her chaos, don’t get her wrong. She felt like she often was the odd one out in life. Always thinking differently than the ones around her. She often was the one to suggest spontaneous late night trips around town or exploration of an abandoned building known for spooky stories. She liked inviting friends over for themed parties for no specific occasions and she liked taking film pictures of friends like they were models even though it was only for her and her memories. She thought of herself as silly and fun, but what Harry described as his chaotic fun actually was regimented tight schedules of constant travel and work. Interesting experiences came out of that constant travel and work, but didn’t seem like something she necessarily wanted to get herself wrapped up in.

After coffee, they leave the café and it’s pouring now. Instead of going home, Harry insists on walking her to her place. She relents, realizing, once again, that Harry wasn’t someone who took ‘no’ for an answer. She then invites him in because it’s the polite thing to do. And Harry being Harry accepts.

“Want a dry sweatshirt while you wait?” She asks as she slips off her wet shoes and jacket in the entryway. Harry follows suit, his knit sweater being pelted with rain for the last eight minutes left him feeling cold and shivery.

He nods as he toes off his shoes and ventures back to the living room she had him wait in a few hours ago.

“Here,” She says as she tosses a grey sweatshirt in his direction. She believes it's her one from earlier, an innocuous pullover with ‘London’ in collegiate lettering on the front. He catches it as she rounds the corner to turn up the heater.

Her mistake was being so careless to not look at the sweatshirt before handing it over to her neighbor. Anyone else, maybe they wouldn’t have questioned it. But Harry, how could he not.

“What’s this?”

“A sweatshirt,” she doesn’t spare him a glance on the coach as she fiddles with the thermostat.

“It’s one of my sweatshirts,” Harry says and she can hear the smile on his face.

“That’s impossible, I’ve never borrowed-” Her brows had raised at what he said but now her words fall short.

He didn’t mean one of his personal sweatshirts that she possibly borrowed if they were better friends. No. He meant his merchandise.

“It was a gift,” she sighs as she turns to face him. He’s now wearing the sweatshirt proudly and grinning up at her smugly.

She rolls her eyes when he gives her a knowing smile.

“I didn’t know that it was the one I was handing you. Honest!”

“I thought you didn’t “keep up” with musicians,” Harry says playfully, his fingers making quotes appropriately.

“I don’t.” Her tone is serious as she plops on the couch beside Harry.

“I enjoy your music from time to time. Is that a crime?!” She finally exclaims when she can’t handle Harry’s knowing smirk.

“No it’s not, you could have just told me you were a fan!” She tries to stop him and protest that she wouldn’t consider herself a fan, but he continues, “I still would have wanted to have been friends.You’re one of the liveliest neighbors I’ve got. Everyone else on the street is rather dull.”

She chuckles, remembering finding out quickly that the street wasn’t a lively bunch.  

“I just wouldn’t say I’m a fan,” she presses and sits across from him.

He continues smiling like he knows the truth.

“I don’t think you’ve met an average person in awhile, Harry.” She finally says after they sat in silence for a few minutes because they were both too stubborn to be the first to talk.

“I would hardly call you average if that’s what you’re implying, Y/N.” He nods her way and he shifts on her plush couch, his legs adjusting themselves on their own accord. “And I know plenty of average people,” he adds huffily.

“I normally wouldn’t either, but compared to who you seem to surround yourself, I very much am. And that’s not meant to be a jab at anyone involved.”

His right hand sneaks up to his head to scratch at the base of a particularly perfect curl. His eyes squint a bit as his mind processes her claim.

“What are you trying to say exactly?”

“I’m just curious to see if you’d actually like me in your life. It seems like you want to be friends with me and that’s great, but realistically I don’t know how much I would fit into it.”

Harry scoffs, “That’s literally bullshit, just relax. I’m so chill you won’t even know what to do with me.”

Now it’s her turn to scoff. “Chill?!” She asks incredulously. Harry nods with a seriousness she hadn’t seen before.

“When’s the next time you’re flying off to another country for work?”

Harry pauses, “Um...the day after the final match. I’m beginning to film a movie, so I’ll be there for a month.”

“Busy bee,” she muses and they both chuckle.

There’s something about the somber look Harry is giving her. His eyes twinkled in the coffee shop and with playful winks she was excited to be in his presence. But after she mentions when his next trip is, he seems saddened. There’s skepticism behind his eyes and maybe he doesn’t like being challenged about who he is from other people, especially those who are new in his life.

But that’s who Y/N is, she’s straightforward and doesn’t lie to someone. If Harry was now her friend, she was going to tell it like it is to him. That personality trait she worried wouldn’t make her long for his world.

“So the cardigan? Do you have it here?” Harry changes the subject, clearly not wanting to actually consider a realistic friendship together instead just charging ahead with no hesitation. Whatever happened they would deal with it as it came. Maybe she should just go with the flow, let herself be swept up into his madness. Maybe it would be easier than fighting it.

“No.”

“Oh?”

“I do, I was joking. Where else would it be?” Her tone is light, trying to get back the shine she had seen Harry exhibit before it had vanished.

Maybe that was Harry’s effect on people. He was vibrant and like an Elton John song. You never wanted that shine to go away, never wanted the song to end. Never wanted him to stop shining his light on you. She felt this happening in just a few hours with him. When he was happy so was she and when he wasn’t entirely shining she wanted to do whatever she could to get it back.

A smile curls on his face and his green eyes narrow slightly. He’s trying to figure her out, know what she’s all about.

“Do you want to go and grab it?” His voice sweetening, almost like a tease. Maybe he means to bite his lip, maybe he doesn’t, but the effect on her is nonetheless earthshaking.

She pops up and smiles back, happy to have made him happy. As she walks out of the room to go get the cardigan that had started this all, her head tilts and she furrows her brow wondering why she felt such a sense of pride just for making him happy.

Would this man cause her to finally put someone else’s wishes ahead of hers?

-

“Are you on your way?”

She listens to Harry’s slightly worried voice crackle over the speaker of her phone as she shuts her door with the hand not holding her phone to her ear. His voice is raspy and muffled. She assumes it’s from the cold air of London at night and the scarf he is likely got wrapped around his neck.

“Yes! Jeez, I’m on my way. Walking over right now.”

It’s the final match for Harry’s football team and if they win the game then they get a trophy and it’s all Harry has been talking about since they got coffee and she handed over her cardigan.

Harry huffed an “alright” on the other side of the line and she called a “see you soon” before hanging up.

He was both eager for Y/N to come and possibly meet some of his teammates and a few of his close friends who he had invited and for her to arrive so that she wasn’t walking out late at night alone. He hadn’t known her for long, but he felt a certain protectiveness over her. She was relatively alone here, only two friends at work that she had mentioned and everyone else lived far away. She said she didn’t mind it, but Harry had a hard time understanding it since he surrounded himself with his friends as much as he could and was constantly either traveling or having them travel to see him.

He had even contemplated inviting her to come to Los Angeles with him for a month, but knew she would remind him of her ever important job that she couldn’t just randomly take a month off.

He’d have to ask her what exactly she did because every time he tried to remember, it always slipped his mind.

When her figure came into sight below the fluorescent lights, he breathed a sigh of relief. A grin spread on his face as she beamed at him and waved a bit. He didn’t understand how she couldn’t see how special she was. Every time he saw her he felt himself straighten up and feel a bubbling in his chest. Her smile was infectious and the way her eyes glittered when she looked away quickly and then returned eye contact made him want to stay in her presence forever.

“You made it!” Harry said and scooped her up in his arms, not realizing just how happy he was to see her, swinging her around in a half circle.

She laughs in surprise, but appreciates the warmth Harry’s hug offers her. She’s not quite sure they had ever touched each other before this moment beside shoulder brushes and hand touches. Nothing so...purposeful.

“I made it,” she confirms and pats him on his broad shoulders.

Questions in her mind raced as she questioned whether it was normal for friendships to happen like this. She knew in college friendships could happen this quickly. And that’s when it dawned on her, she really hadn’t made a new friend since college and that was why everything with Harry was so odd to her. She had forgotten what new friendship was. She needed to stop questioning everything and just live in the moment with a person she really liked being with.

Harry’s hands move from her waist and one stays to lead her forward so he can introduce her to some of his mates, as he had promised.

She felt at home in that moment. His hand on the small of her back, his heat radiating off of him and her hair swept behind her ears and her cheek pressed to his shoulder staring up at him sweetly.

She meets Charlotte, a member of Harry’s band who lives in London, her boyfriend, Mitch (who had just happened to find himself in Hampstead this weekend), Ben, and a few more people she couldn’t remember all the names of.

Harry’s team wins the game and Y/N’s not sure if she’s ever seen someone so happy to win an adult league football match. There wasn’t any official trophy except the one Harry had made himself and said he would even give to the other team if they won. It was engraved with the words “The World’s Greatest Football Team of Stars Ever. October 22, 2020”. It doesn’t even make sense but she’d been holding it for the entire night as he played.

He goes down the line of his friends who have been watching and gives them all jubilant kisses on the lips. When he reaches Y/N she holds out the trophy and he grins and gives her a kiss on the cheek. His lips are surprisingly soft and his scratchy stubble tickles her and she swiftly pulls back, a smile on her face and blush on her cheeks nonetheless.

Charlotte and Mitch share a look between the two of them and Ben’s eyes narrow slightly at the interaction. His eyes narrow just as they had when Harry had strutted over to the group with Y/N before the game. He had happily named everyone and she had shaken all of their hands with a warm smile on her lips. Ben had regarded her warily and she had shaken it off as the chill of the night air. But there it was again, not quite trusting of the neighbour girl Harry had just randomly befriended a few days ago.

The team and the friends of the team decide they deserve to celebrate this win, mostly at the request of Harry.

Y/N tries to find a time to leave, to return to her place so she can prepare for her day at work tomorrow. But no excuses will be heard from Harry and she has a hard time saying no to his sparkling eyes and gorgeous grin that she’s growing far too accustomed to.

She’s ushered down to the closest pub with the rest of them and finds herself chatting with Charlotte’s boyfriend. He’s the most...normal. She’s not sure how to explain it, but he doesn’t seem to be regarding her as different, unlike every other one of Harry’s friends. They were all perfectly nice and cordial with her, but she just felt like she wasn’t a part of their group, their world and she didn’t know how to explain it.

Charlotte and Mitch are rather nice too, but they’re more reserved with her. They’re musicians, like Harry, and they somewhat have that air of awareness around them that Harry sometimes gets. She thinks it’s from the fame, having to constantly be wary of who is around you, what everyone is doing, what is happening next. She doesn’t mind it, it’s just not something she’s used to.

She wishes she could just throw back some drinks and she could allow herself to be more...well just be more. More of a presence, more of herself, but she has a job she has to get to bright and early. Tomorrow was Monday and for her that meant work. So she sips a beer that Harry insisted be on his tab and she makes small talk with Charlotte’s boyfriend about how he’s been helping her produce her first EP. Charlotte occasionally pops in when she hears her name, but mostly is conversing with Mitch over something silly. Y/N knows because they keep laughing.  

Harry is going around to just about everyone in the party and she watches as he happily talks with every one of his friends. He’s ecstatic and she wonders if she’s ever experienced happiness like he has.

At midnight she attempts to make a French exit, as her mother always called it, and slip away with little to no farewells, but Harry spots her before she can.

“You’re leaving already?” Harry asks loudly, the euphoria of winning his silly little game and drinking a fair amount of pints has him at his peak boisterity.

“I have work tomorrow,” she says warily, slumping slightly from the weight of Harry’s arm slinging around her shoulder.

He turns serious and straightens up slightly, his green eyes looking especially dark in the pubs dim lighting as they look her dead in the eye. “Let me walk you home.”

“I can get home by myself,” she laughs, shrugging off his hold. “Plus, the host can’t leave his own celebration.” She gestures to everyone else happily celebrating on a Sunday, somehow not bothered by the beginning of the average week.

He steps closer, his brow furrowing for the first time that night. One of his large hands raises to his tousled hair and he runs it through the tresses. He even nibbles at his lower lip as he contemplates his decision. Then quickly and suddenly, he makes up his mind,

“No, I’ll escort you. Can’t have my neighbour walk home this late alone. I’ll just leave my card with Mitch. He’ll settle up the tab.” He smiles at his perfect plan and she grimaces feeling slightly embarrassed that he would leave his friends to walk her home. “Won’t you Mitch?” Harry calls as he grabs his coat from the wall next to the door. Mitch simply nods and Harry yells his farewells, Y/N waves meekly.

“That was...interesting,” she mulls over her words as they walk through the cold night air outside of the pub.

“Amazing, right?” Harry speaks over her less enthusiastic voice.

“You have a lot of friends,” she mused, trying to sound less disheartened than she had in her last statement.

Harry only hums and shivers slightly from the cold. His breath comes clearly out in puffs in the cold night air. Y/N’s is muffled by her scarf wrapped tightly up to her chin. She’s tucked his face as far into it as possible but her nose won’t stop from freezing as they walk.

Her hand goes up to it and she rests her palm to the tip of it. The motion grabs Harry’s attention and he looks directly at her curiously.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m freezing,” she muffles out, “This helps my cold nose not be so..cold.”

He chuckles and wraps his arm around her shoulder and she easily folds into him, welcoming any warmth right now.

After another moment of silence and them enjoying each other’s warmth and slight smell of whatever perfumes they had chosen earlier that night as well as beer and wood of the pub, Harry nuzzles his head above hers and then asks her something.

“Was that overwhelming for you?”

She’s quiet, thankful his eyes can’t reach hers right now. He was too powerful with those things.

“I, um, a little. I just...I just realized today that I haven’t made a new friend since college outside of work and it was overwhelming just hanging out with you. So all of your friends as well, yeah, it was a bit much for me.”

Harry looks out at the empty street ahead of them and sighs in realization. In his excitement, he hadn’t accounted how she might have felt tonight until just now. He wanted to kick himself for not thinking of her feelings, but other’s feelings slipped his mind so easily sometimes.

They round their street corner and she nuzzles back into his side.

“I’m sorry, love.” He rubs at her outer arm, “I didn’t think about it like that. I was just so excited for my plan to come together. Maybe next time, it’ll just be a couple of them rather than so many?”

“Sure,” she says quickly, wanting to make him happy, knowing how much he cared about his friends. “I feel like we need to hang out more with just you before I osmos into your friend group though if I’m being honest.”

“Well that can definitely be arranged,” he says and reluctantly lets go of her body. They’ve arrived at her door.

“I also want to see the inside of your house at some point.” She tugs at one of his hands before it can disappear into his warm coat pocket. “Houses,” she corrects.

“That can also be arranged,” Harry smiles with his lips closed. Pink lips and rosy cheeks extra bright from the cold. He plays with her fingers as the two stand close to one another, happy for the alone time and chalking the proximity up to heat sharing.

“You leave tomorrow right?” She finally asks.

His head falls and he sighs.

“Yeah…”

“It’s just a month,” she smiles, trying to stop Harry from being so dramatic. Especially when there was no logical reason for him to be so upset over not seeing his neighbour - she keeps telling herself.

“Are you sure you can’t quit your job and just fly out with me?” He pleads.

She throws her head back in laughter and shifts closer to him, her front porch light illuminating and shadowing every perfect place on Harry’s gorgeous face.

“Not even a chance.”

“That is a shame,” he takes an experimental step closer and she feels his breath fan across her cheeks at his last word.

She wrinkles his nose at the smell of his last beer, even though coming from him it was endearing.

Just as she feels him being to shift his head closer, she steps forward and gives him a tight hug.

“Goodnight Harry,” she whispers into his ear, “Safe travels.”

Then she’s stepping back and swiftly unlocking her door. She moves it slowly so as to not wake Rori and then Harry’s left alone and dumbfounded on her doorstep.

He definitely preferred being with her alone, but now he didn’t even have that chance until next month. And nonetheless she had just sidestepped his kiss with such ease he’s not even sure if he meant to kiss her. It had felt right, but why? Because it was cold and picture perfect? Or because he was enchanted by her and liked her as more than a new friend?

She slumps in her kitchen and fixes an Emergen-C to stave off the chill of the night and any germs that might have been lurking around the pub. She hopes when she walks to her bedroom she can check the front porch and see that Harry has gone home because she would hate to turn the light off on him.

How could he have expected her to kiss him just then? They’ve only just met each other a few weeks ago? And he’s Harry Styles and she just lives in the neighbourhood. What the actual fuck had happened to her life?

[boogiewrites]

Never Break the Chain Pt. 3

Part 3 of 5

Characters: Javier Peña x OFC

Summary:  Esme keeps her distance and Javier's obsession gets worse. She decides to let him find her and they're both faced with the hard questions they've been suppressing for decades.

Warnings/Tags: Reunited Lovers.  Angst. Yearning. Difficult adult conversations. Regret. Nostalgia. 

Click on my icon then go to my Mobile Masterlist in my bio for my other works and chapters. (Had to do this since Tumblr killed links, sorry.) Please like, comment and reblog if you enjoyed it! It helps out us writers A LOT!

Steve stood staring and ignored by a red-eyed and greasy Peña still hunched over a desk with boxes of old files piling up around him. The boxes obscured half of him, stacks that started on the desktop, now on the floor. His nose twitched from the dust and his eyes burned from lack of sleep.

“Did you ever leave?” Murphy moves a few boxes to sit on his desk that had been commandeered for Pena’s obsession.

As if snapping out of a trance, Javier looks up and around, seeing morning light again through the high windows in the cool-hued room that lacked any warmth in its sterile choice of furnishings. “Guess not.” he yawns and looks back down at the work he’s done.

“You look like shit, man.”

“Thanks.” he gruffs out and stretches, a noise that half groan and half yawn escapes him.

“Did you at least find anything?”

“Plenty.” he pauses and rubs his face. “Unfortunately.” he pushes a legal pad full of scribbled notes with dates.

“These...all her?”

“I think so.”

“Damn Javi, you sure can pick ‘em.” he grins at the expense of his partner.

“She always said she was gonna be rich.”

“The Lucchia Heist?” Steve snorts in amusement.

“Potentially. She’s…” he lets out a slightly crazed but hushed laugh. “She’s fuckin’ good.” he covers his face before resting his head on his palm, supported by the desk. “I’d bet my badge she’s framed more people than I’ve even had time to find. Had a million aliases. Been everywhere from Corpus Christi to Lima. I’ve traced her down the continent.”

“And she landed right in your backyard.” Steve tosses the roughed-up papers, months of research, back in front of him. “You’re not a man who believes in fate are ya Javi?” he smirks.

“She said she didn’t know I was here.” a mumbled response as he begins putting away his research.

“And you believe her?”

He focuses on removing the evidence of his fascination, putting it away in a drawer that’s near full and dedicated to her. He stops and pauses, a thoughtful expression before answering, “I might be another sucker in the long list she’s got but... yeah, I do.”

-----

With the aged bulbs in the generic hotel room, the woman with him was easy to push out of his mind. He outstretched his arm as she pulled on her panties with a jump.

“Who is Esme?” she asks softly, attempting to make a connection with a man she felt she almost knew with as many times as they’d been together.

He didn’t look her way and motioned the hand with the money in it again.

“You’ve had your nights before but… the past few months you’ve... and now tonight? Should I be worried?”

“No,” he states with a bite. It wasn’t directed at her but himself. He tossed the money onto the bed and moved to light a cigarette. “You shouldn’t be no matter how I act.”

She holds in a sigh, a grimace on her face as she pockets the money and dresses. “Are you su-”

“What do you want to hear?” he turns his head sharply her way, brow low, but not aggressive enough to make her fear him.

She knew men, and she knew his problem was a woman, not the job like it usually was. Javier didn't get emotional over work when they were together. He would be rougher sometimes, softer others... but a disconnect was far from the usual. He was a client she was glad to hear from. He treated her with respect, he looked her in her eyes and handled her as if he cared about how she felt while they fucked. It was rare but entirely welcome. She curses herself silently for caring. He was right.

“I’m sorry,” she answers curtly. “You’re right.” she nods and gathers her things. “I’ll go.”

“It’s not you-” he begins with his head down before she passes him at the foot of the bed.

“I know. It’s not my business. It’s... I know women. It's hard to believe you would have trouble with one.” she lets out a smile to break the tension and his face doesn’t tell her if she succeeded or not. “You know where to find me.” she says kindly, something he felt he didn’t entirely deserve at the moment. He could hear her heels patting down the hallway outside when she left, fading until she was down the elevator and gone.

He gives his forehead a hard rub, nails scratching into his scalp before taking a long drag. “Fuck.” he exhales loudly to an empty room. He couldn’t get her out of his head.

-------------------------

The heat was something he had grown up with, he never found that part of Colombian weather to be difficult. But the humidity, that was a different experience. He quickly lost any self-consciousness about the sweat showing through his shirts, everyone else's looked the same. Propped against a stucco wall that was radiating the sun's warmth into his back, he partook in his condensation-covered beer bottle and his favorite public activity, people watching. It was an art form for him, once an amusing pastime that he made a living off now. There was no short of things to look for, the Festival of Flowers was in full swing and everyone was crowded into the streets. It was loud, a bit chaotic, and exactly the sort of crowd he felt comfortable observing.

The Discoteca a few streets down was powerful, sending music out over the radios in stalls and stores dotted along the streets surrounding it. It wasn’t entirely unpleasant but that didn’t stop Javier from having an annoyed expression. Songs from his past would play casually, feeling anything but in his head. He knocked back the rest of his drink and promptly got another every time a memory was triggered.

It had been almost a year now since he’d seen Esme. From what he’d learned, he wasn’t surprised. She could keep playing the phoenix forever. She could’ve been across the world by now and he was powerless to pursue her. Of all the possibilities, he still held onto the statistical probability that she was still around. She had good connections here, it made sense for her to stay. This unignorable fact led his obsession to be indulged by his profession, his paranoia fueled by his keen observational skills. A handful of times he would’ve bet he'd seen her. Sometimes he could follow, others he couldn't. Either way, he ended up at a brothel and with a woman who may look like her but wasn’t. The boisterous festival crowds would be a perfect place for her to be anonymous, the plumes of flowers were cover to disappear in plain sight. He wouldn’t admit to himself, but he was feeling hopeful. Or was it the alcohol?

Esme, with her head heavy from the large crown of flowers she wore, matching her brightly colored traditional dress skipped and hopped her way across the rooftops of the lively streets. She held the flowers to her head and jumped from pitch to pitch with her woven shoes. She knew this part of the city in light or dark. Not just for her safety but for means to get the drop on others. Her work with the cartel made sure she was knowledgeable in such things. But it also came in handy for a specific reason she’d been indulging in for almost a year now.

He was moping around his usual watering hole for this part of town. She sat with her head on her hands, between two flower pots, watching Javier from the safety of the rooftop across the street. She’d seen him many times, mostly taking home girls, or spoiling them with nice hotels for the night. Since she now knew the Pena she’d heard of was HER Pena, she asked the local sex workers about him and she wasn’t let down with the gossip they shared. She found out he’d been looking for her, not that any of them knew she was this infamous woman the playboy was hung up on. After a polite offer of employment, she dipped out and felt an odd satisfaction in what he’d become. It wasn’t ideal by any means but he was a good man. That was more than she would’ve guessed he’d become with the company he kept.

Each song from their past hit their ears at the same time, both suppressing a sigh as it floated down the streets, imagining a simpler time with one another. She’d missed him. Just as he had, she’d tried to drink and fuck the pain away for a bit but it didn’t work as well for her. She was left feeling nostalgic and downright amorous about him, seeing him lean, strong, and handsome against that wall. Sweat beading down his neck like it did on the bottle he held. She wanted to pop those buttons right off his shirt and- she knew it wasn’t smart to indulge in such fantasies. But he was the only man left that she even cared to think about when he wasn’t directly in her line of sight. She wanted to see him again. Was she willing to throw away months of laying low for a rendezvous? The summer sun made her feel young, the songs pumping blood to places, like her heart, it didn’t normally flow anymore. It made her feel young again. And at this point, it was a welcome and sought-after feeling.

——

A group of dancing girls covered in flowers with wide sweeping skirts made their way down the street. They wore smiles and the brightest of colors, dancing with each other and passersby as carts of flowers were pushed around them. Esme had been in South America long enough to know how to blend in. It was easy considering she didn’t look like a gringo. Her Latin heritage assured a degree of anonymity and mixing in, adding in the factor of whirling skirts and a blur of color from flowers she melded right in. Her chameleon skills were enviable but Javier’s observation skills were better.

Of course, he’d look at the group of beautiful women flouncing towards him. He seldom passed a woman he didn’t take a second glance at. As he glanced over their faces, to see if any had been friendly to him previously, the set of emerald green eyes grabbed him as they sat deep-set in a heart-shaped face he used to know intimately. Like a dog with a scent caught in his nose, he perks up, bottle discarded as he takes a step towards the street. She separates herself, a clear view of each other for a moment before a smile as bright as the sun beating down on them meets his gobsmacked expression. For only a moment there’s an unbroken line of sight and he instinctively pursues. With a bite of her lip that was a mix of flirtation excitement and a challenge, she spins on her heel and runs to an alleyway. He was fast on his feet behind.

This was where she felt at home, fast and light on her feet through small spaces and over walls. She desired to test Javi, combined with her caring about anyone seeing them, luring him to a safe space. She could hear his grunts and calls of her name like it was a swear as she’d climb and hop drain pipes and fences. All he could hear was the occasional heavy breath and giggle coming from her. They moved away from the busy streets, up higher over every sketchy rooftop, and eventually came to climb onto a secluded and blocked-off rooftop together.

“You've still got it Javi.” she laughs breathlessly, hands on her knees from the far side of the roof he’s slid onto.” her face beams his way, a sheen of sweat catching in the sun as she fluffs back her hair.

“I never lost it,” he grunts, dusting off his jeans. “Can’t afford to.” he pauses and regains his cocky posture.

“You look good.” she offers as a compliment, both closing the space between them to face off.

He takes his time, looking her up and down, unsure of her motives, yet she'd always had that wild streak. He used to love that about her. Now it made it hard to read. “So do you.” he presents in response to her out-of-place compliment.

“It's nice to finally see you up close.” her face is relaxed, too relaxed in his opinion. She touches his chest, hands light on his collar and moving up to tuck back the messed pieces of dark hair from his sideburns.

“That mean you’ve seen me from afar?” he stands stoically still, letting her touch him, not ready to reciprocate.

“Possibly,” she smirks, eyes trailing over his now-adult facial features. His brow had hardened, his jaw rounder but still sharp. Her favorite part, his nose was now proportionate and he was even more attractive up close. She lets a small sigh slip, dedicating his handsome face to memory. “Couldn’t let you pick up on my location could I?”

“Is that why you knocked me out?”

She lets out a chuckle and pats his chest. “That was… an unfortunate mistake on your behalf and a fortunate one for me. I have laced lipstick I wear during jobs. Easy to kiss a man and get away. Less messy than shooting. And far quieter.”

“Poison lipstick…” he nods thoughtfully.

“I’ve spent years perfecting it, dosing myself with tiny amounts to have immunity. Took a note from the Renaissance covert killers.” she smiles proudly. “I’m very proud of it.”

“You should be,” he admits begrudgingly. “I’ve looked up your work. It’s… impressive.”

“That means a lot coming from you. Your career has been notable as well.”

“Looks like we both got what we wanted, huh?” The response was bleeding with sarcasm.

She bites her lip, her shoulders slumping just enough for him to notice. “It is what we said we wanted.” her voice was softer now, less playful and confident as he sees the lump in her throat bob up and down. He lets her sit with her words for a moment, seeing a passing sadness behind her eyes. They seemed even brighter green than he remembered. But memories aren’t always honest.

“Where have you been?” a demand, not much of a sweet inquiry.

“If you’ve looked at my records then you know already. “

“This past year. Where have you been?"

“In Colombia.” She gives a subtle shrug.

“So I don’t get an answer?”

“You want the longitude and latitude? I can’t give you exact locations so you can know where to find people.” She frowns.

“You think I give a shit about that?” His brow furrowed and his head tilts. She’s caught off guard by his defensiveness. “The shit I deal with… a couple of stones means nothing. I want to know about you. That’s why I asked where you had been. Not who you’d been with.”

She felt scolded. It wasn’t something she was used to. Still, he was the only man who could pull it off. “I have a place in the mountains I stay at on occasion. I float around and do jobs. There’s no specific place.”

“You have a place here and you couldn’t come find me?” He sounded almost hurt.

“I can’t have anyone know we know each other. They’d kill me. Kill you.” She knew he was accusing her of not caring. Which couldn’t be farther from the truth. “I didn’t want you getting hurt.” She finally averts her eyes, a vaguely familiar ache in her chest growing.

He lets out a harsh laugh. “Should’ve thought about that twenty years ago when I thought you were dead.” He spits out. He sees the hurt in her eyes and he takes a moment to move her hands from him, and take a ragged breath. “You’ve been SO close this whole time. And I didn’t know…” he clenches his jaw and looks away to the horizon. Readjusting his posture he swings his head back her way and flares over her, an accusing finger in her face. “I can’t take this... you running around and not knowing SHIT about it.”

With sad eyes but a firm expression she swallows. “You used to get possessive like this. I remember… I’d-” Her voice is breathy and her hand moves to remove his from her face, a gentle hold that he answers harshly.

Grabbing her wrist, her eyes widen as he stares her down. “Don’t fucking tease me, Esme.”

Her brow furrowed quickly as she tries to tug away.

“I could take you in right now you know. For so many reasons.”

“You wouldn’t though.”

“Would I not?”

She stares with wide eyes that would’ve made him drop to his knees and beg her forgiveness when he was young. His worst fear was to hurt her back then. Now it was her getting hurt from her own actions.

“You have no idea the hell you put me through, do you? All this time not knowing for sure. And you’ve raised from the dead and think you can fuck with a man's head like this?” She could feel the bite of his words as he spoke quietly to her, letting her wrist go after he made his point. “Do you even give a shit or is this another game you’re running? Are you conning me too? Is there some guy who’s fallen for this shit somewhere with a gun on me right now?”

“How could you say that? I’d never.” She holds back a stutter in her throat. She felt something she hadn’t in a very long time, the sting of tears in her eyes. He regretted his outburst as soon as he saw it. He just had so many years of anger and hurt built up it was hard not to explode.

“Did you miss me at all?” His voice a whisper now, eyes wider and opening up like he was trying to.

It broke her to see him like this now. This stoic figure was just a shell covering that young man she left. She didn’t know it would hold onto him this long, that he did love her that much. “If you saw the wear on my rosary you'd have your answer. I prayed you to be safe. For you to get what you wanted.” She clears her throat and tries not to break.

“All I ever wanted was you.” A clear and plain statement. It was a fact.

“I had to make my own life.” She said it as an excuse and she hated the way it sounded coming from her. It made her feel weak. “You wanted yours.”

“We were kids. We didn’t know what the fuck we wanted.” He huffs out a strangled laugh.

She takes a deep breath and her time in answering. “We were. We didn’t.”

It was an admission of guilt on both their behalfs. They got what they said they wanted but was it really what made them happy? They’d been chasing a fix to fill a void of their own making. And now on the other side, the ugly truth of their dreams stares them and their unhappiness down every day.

“I’m sorry.” She adds and lowers her head. “I felt trapped and I knew you’d… do exactly what you are right now if you thought I was out there.”

“You were right.” He sighs and reaches to lift her chin revealing tears falling down her cheeks. He cups her face and wipes them away with his thumbs.

“I shouldn’t have reached out to you again.” She shakes her head.

“No...no, you should have.” He sighs heavily and pulls her into his chest, something she didn’t expect. “I’m sorry too.” He remarks into her hair, closing his eyes and feeling her in his arms. “I’m just…” he trails off. What could he say? I’m lost, I’m tired, unhappy, empty, angry? There wasn’t enough time to explain how he felt about this... about her. “I’m sorry too. I’m glad you let me find you. Okay?” He leans her head back to look up at him.

“I didn’t know you were here. In Colombia. I came here for work.”

“So did I.” He looks away purses his lips. “You know you can’t work for those men.” He wipes away her tears again, his hand smoothing her black waves away from her face. “They’ll kill you, Esme. The second you do something wrong they won’t even blink.”

“Like talk to you?” She arches a brow and gives him a soft smile. “I know, Javi. I know the risks.”

“And you still did it?”

“I missed you.” she admits with a soft exhale.

He pulls her in again, tighter this time. A kiss to her hair as he strokes his hands over her. “You know you need to get going. It’s almost night they’ll be crawling all over soon.”

She nods but doesn’t pull away. “They can’t see us here. There are no lookouts. It’s why I brought us here.”

“You know this place that well?”

“I have to. I don’t have a choice.” It felt hopeless as it left her trembling lips and it reflected more regret as she let it escape. It sounded as tired as she felt. It was as if being in his arms made her aware of how exhausted she was. How worn and hollow she was.

He knew the sound of exhaustion well. He heard it when he would deflect questions from the women he would pay to distract him from the one in his arms. “I know, sweetheart. Believe me, I know.” When she didn’t pull away, he didn’t make her. It gave him the answers he needed. At least what he needed to make it through another day without her for a short while.

@jaegeeeeer​ @likedovesinthewnd​ @inkededucatednnerdy​  @biharryjames @ladamari68​ @past-romantic​ @weliketomoveit @shikin83​ 

[dehydratedpool]

hello again!! it’s the beginning of a new month, meaning a new fic rec post!! here are some fics that i read this month that are just... exquisite and deserve all the love and attention <3 

there aren’t as many as last time unfortunately, since i was quite busy this past month, but i promise next month won’t fall short! ((fics that i’ve reread this month are indicated with a **))

Foolishly Laying Our Hearts On The Table [11k] by runaway_train @runaway-train-works 

“You think Harry wants that?”

“Dunno. Maybe. Wanna make him happy.” Harry takes advantage of the red light he’s pulled up to turn and look properly at Louis’ face. He’s not even looking in Harry’s direction though, focused instead on something out of his side window, head drooped, mindlessly playing with the string of his hoodie between his fingers, lost in his own world somewhere. For some reason, it makes Harry’s spine straighten.

“Because he’s your best mate?” Harry questions carefully.

“He’s my boyfriend.”

He couldn’t have heard him right. “What?”

Louis releases a deep breath, still not turning around. Harry wonders who he thinks he’s talking to right now. “He’s so pretty. Want to kiss him all day long. And buy him a big house and give him presents and marry him.”

Or; The one where Harry is in love with his best friend Louis but doesn't think he stands a chance until some wisdom teeth and a rather unusual confession might just change his mind.

--> this is a new comfort fic for me tbh. i got rec’d this after louis tweeted about getting his wisdom teeth removed, and i’m so SO glad i decided to give it a read. it’s so precious and lovely and personally, i found it to be a quick read. it’s the kind of fic that makes me both warm and fuzzy inside but also highly upset that i’m single and will surely be alone forever

Just Let Me [14k] by HelloAmHere 

The party was going well. So well, Niall had already sworn undying love to one multi-tiered chocolate cake, two friendly corgi-poodle mixes, Zayn’s hair, and the entire population of Los Angeles. So well, Zayn had only laughed and ruffled Niall’s hair and not even twitched towards a cigarette. So well, nearly everyone had spilled far past the boundaries of the night’s original plans, extracting bottles of vodka from the cabinets and losing a lot of clothes. Harry had proclaimed that he was finally going to throw a small and very grownup dinner party and of course here they were three hours later, fifty people half-naked in the pool. Soon to be full-naked, if Louis had to guess. Everybody in LA loved a heated pool. Everybody loved Harry.

--> ok LISTEN. as some of you know, i just recently got into reading a/b/o fics and this one is definitely at the top of my fave a/b/o fics out there. it’s an interesting take on the trope, almost a bit more realistic in my opinion, and to quote the author’s note, “’what if a/b/o but less biological determinism?’”. i believe i found this one through a masterpost of “touch-deprivation fics”, so if that’s your thing, give this one a chance!

my ugly mouth kept running [4k] by theankletattoo @hadestyles

Another seed, another try except they know what caused the first wilt. They will be careful, they will be kind and together they will nurture it to life.

sometimes second chances are more important than the first.

--> rori, the author, never fails to disappoint when it comes to all of her works. i’ve said it once and i’ll say it again, she’s so incredibly fucking talented it’s unreal. her imagery is so vivid and real it leaves simultaneously everything and nothing to the imagination. as usual, h and l’s dynamic in this is an addicting portion to this fic that has you anticipating how their dynamic will shift and grow up until the end. if you’ve yet to read any of rori’s work, i suggest you add that to your to-do list for the month, and get a head start to her collection with this one!

**As Wicked As Anything Could Be [21k] by whoknows @crazyupsetter

It starts when Louis decides that he wants to lose his cherry and announces that he thinks the best way to do that is by going to a gay club. Naturally, Harry can’t let him go alone, so he tags along and spends the night rating guys with Louis until someone finally catches Louis’s eye.

Harry shoves him out to dance with the guy, and he can already tell that it’s going to be a quick and dirty hook up, so he’s not surprised that Louis and the guy disappear into the bathroom ten minutes later.

It is a surprise when Louis comes out not even two minutes later, pale and clammy, grabs Harry by the hand and drags him right out the door.

Somehow Harry comes to the decision that it would be a good idea for him to be in the room with Louis while Louis gets laid.

It’s a stupid fucking decision.

--> i discovered this fic a while ago on a whim and i have zero regrets. this is absolutely on my top ten fave fics list (that has yet to exist but perhaps i’ll post it one day). whoknows is a well known author within the fandom, so i’m sure i don’t have to say much about their immense talent, but SERIOUSLY, their plot progression, even their use of dialogue is wonderful in every way. as a writer, i envy them lmao. this fic takes me on a rollercoaster every time i read it, it’s yet another comfort fic of mine and never fails to disappoint every time i pick it up again. please, do yourselves a favor this april and read this.

Keeping The Flame Alive [19k] by whoknows @crazyupsetter 

Recording with One Direction never felt like this. There’s a couple reasons for that, Harry thinks. One is that they did most of their recording on the road, rushed and in busses and hotel rooms, never in one place long enough to really get an argument going. The other, larger and more important one, is that back then he had the sweetest, meanest little omega around to distract him from all of that frustration.

The first time around, when he’d been recording his debut solo album, it hit him pretty hard. He likes to think he’s better adjusted to it now, but frustration is warring under his skin nonetheless. He doesn’t want to be told what to do most of the time, and he especially doesn’t want to be told what to do when it comes to his music.

What he does want right now is that sweet, mean little omega right in front of him with his mouth on Harry’s cock. Unfortunately, the best he’s got is his own hand and a shared toilet. So. That’s really not going to work.

--> yes, for the first time in dehydratedpoolfics history of fic recs even tho i’ve only been doing this for a month i am rec’ing the same author twice, but seriously, how could i not??? this fic took me on a literal journey like... wtf. i have no words. seriously, i have none, i’m just that blown away, go read it for yourself .

**a trail of honey through it all [27k] by bruisedhoney @yvesaintlourent 

The boy in front of him, well really, the man in front of him, was like something out of a confusing wet dream. Built, tall, tan and muscular, his skin glistened with sweat after a long day of working outdoors with his hands. He was wearing a cut up old American football shirt, the bottom hem was torn and the sleeves were cut off to the point where the t-shirt was really just a loose tank top. The shorts he had on had clearly been full length jeans at one point, and were now just crudely cut off above the knee. His white socks were pulled up too high on his calves, and the brown work boots he had on were old as fuck, the leather peeling along the edges of the soles. Curly brown hair stuck out from the edges of his backwards snapback, and there was a smudge of grease wiped along his brow bone. The smattering of hair along his jaw proved that he hadn’t shaved in a week or two, the hair growing in thicker across his upper lip and around his chin. His sinfully bowed mouth was pink and plump, and Louis was suddenly hyper-focused on the way that he chewed at the toothpick stuck between his lips. He looked like he needed a shower. Louis wanted to lick him.

Or, the TPH fic we’ve all been waiting for.

--> okay look. i may or may not have a slight obsession with this fic. i reread it constantly, mostly for the iconic line, “are we fuckin’ or fightin’?”, because how can i not scream over that?? ((also patiently waiting for the sequel)) this is a literary masterpiece, one that defines an entire generation of this fandom i stg. but in all seriousness, hayley, the author, does such a wonderful job of giving the reader a vivid look into “nowhere, georgia”, and as a southern gal myself, i absolutely adore the itty bitty pieces of southern culture embedded into this, the tiny quirks that make this fic authentic. i could probably go on forever on why this fic is so iconic, but perhaps you should read it for yourself instead *wink* *wink*

SO. that’s all for this month!! if you read any of these, first of all, be sure to read the tags and author’s note (if any) before starting, AND please don’t forget to leave a quick kudos or comment, it means more than you may ever know <3

[celestialflamesme]

| THE GUM CONUNDRUM | A Stashi One-shot | Fairy Tail Next Generation |

Ship: Storm Fullbuster x Nashi Dragneel

It was a normal, uneventful day in the magical town of Magnolia.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S OUT OF STOCK?!"

"SIR, YOUR CLOTHES!!"

Well, almost.

Storm huffed, exiting the grocery store (Why even call it grocery store if it didn't have the goddamn essentials?) just as Gale yelled "Pick the pace, prick! I have a book to get to!"

He rolled his eyes, "Gee, talk about priorities."

Gale sauntered forward, crimson eyes unimpressed. "Less talk, more walk."

The Demon-slayer frowned at him. "Go right ahead, I need to find another store for my damn gum!"

"Yeah no, Team Storm needs the goddamn leader to sign off the register or it's invalid," He shot him a dirty look, "Which one of you oafs decided on that rule again?"

"Hey, it's a good rule! Especially since the pyrofreak gets motion sick and takes like an hour to recover. Win-win!" Storm rubbed his hands evilly.

The archive mage deadpanned, "Right."

"Moodkill."

Storm scanned the street for any signs of that familiar blue vending machine but to no avail.

What the heck?! Wasn't it supposed to be an icon? Disrespect is what it was. Storm himself featured in their advert a few months ago and it sold quite a few million copies. (Nashi still glared at him whenever he brought that up. She'd received quite a few threats and demands to lay off the Ice Demon Slayer back then. Mira was thrilled. She however, was not.)

"Uh, Storm. You might want to get a look at this."

He waved a sheet of paper, his face a little too smug for the news to be good. The raven head squinted at him and proceeded to snatch it.

There, in bold black letters, was the title of his nightmare track.

FIORE GUM BANNED

"Fiore gum has now been officially banned after research suggested the carcinogen vinyl acetate was present in staggering amounts-"

Storm Fullbuster was a simple man, he had only 3 basic needs: Food, a roof over his head and Fiore gum (Bah, who needs clothes?) One pack per day, was that so hard a request?

"Well, considering the serious health violations here, it seems logical to ban it before it's released worldwide. Isn't that in like a month?"

He glared at the Archive mage, "Not helping, Gale."

"I wasn't exactly trying to," Storm flipped the bird at him for that, "But what exactly was it that you said before? Ah, priorities. Sweet, sweet irony."

Right now the ice mage had the urge to rip him a new one. Nothing would be sweeter. Ugh, Nashi was never going to let this go, was she? She'd smirk at him, bite that annoying little lip of hers, and say "Serves you right, Frostbite, for all the shit I went through. Cheers." And go celebrate while he was out there, maybe in prison-

"Dude, clothes."

"Fuck em, we have no time! We have to stock up on gum!" He jumped forth, causing an old lady passing by to shriek and swing her cane threateningly. Again, it was his Constitutional right to get the choice to wear (or not wear) whatever he wanted to! Talk about judgemental!

He could already feel the uncomfortable sweat on his brow. Damn withdrawal symptoms. He'd gone through this hell once before (When his mom decided to ground him the hard way for destroying a town) and was NOT going to go through that again. Nope.

"New mission: We find a pack of Fiore gum or die trying!" He pumped his fist in the air. "ALL ABOARD!"

"Oh bother," Gale grumbled.

...........

One rabid Chihuahua (those things were nasty, how the hell did people own them willingly?!) and an armada of Rune Knights later, the duo gave up.

"FINE! IF THE UNIVERSE WANTS TO PLAY DIRTY, I WILL NOT ENGAGE! NOPE! I'M GOING BACK!"

Gale huffed, "If only you were struck with this realisation 3 hours ago, I'd be at home. Content. Free. With no fear of a goddamn puppy pouncing at me from any corner." They collectively shuddered.

"And that kids, is how you cartwheel!" Nashi's giggle followed from in front of the guild quarters.

Typical, she'd be here having the time of her life while he suffered.

Okay, that was mean of him. It wasn't as if she truly had anything against him. He just loved messing with her. She was nice when she wanted to be.

"ETHAN! NOT THERE-"

Bang. Crash. Screech. The notorious triplet's head popped out of the trash pile near them, covered in grime. Nashi grimaced through her hands (God, her annoying nose was all scrunched up! Don't even start with her damn eyes!)

She sighed, pulling him out with one hand. "Your mom is gonna skin you alive, you know that, right?" The 7-year old shrugged in response and his relatively well-mannered brother Elijah facepalmed. How they were even related was beyond any of their understanding.

She ushered them in, and turned back to hoist herself on one of the railings upfront and swing her legs.

Oh, look at that, Gale left already.

He strode forth with a smirk that he knew she detested from her very being and tapped her shoulder, despite the fact that he knew she sniffed him a mile away.

She narrowed her eyes. "What?"

"Nothing." He smirked again.

She rolled her eyes and continued to- chew?

He raised an eyebrow, "Whatcha eating, dumbass?"

Which is when she proceeded to pop a bubble at his face. Oh no.

She grinned at him like the cat that got the cream, "Not that it's any of your business." Pop. "But it's Fiore gum."

3 hours. He could feel the sweat and his fingers twitched impatiently. "Oh."

There were two ways he could play this.

Way one. Ask the dragon nicely. She was usually extra generous with her friends. It's not like she even liked gum.

"Mind if I borrow a piece?"

She blinked. "Uh, I mean, sure."

He couldn't help but smile as she fiddled with her pockets taking out papers and wrappers of all shapes and sizes. Despite all their banter, and her one sided hatred, Storm knew he like-liked the Fire Dragonslayer the second she punched him in preschool for being 'stupid'.

And now?

With her hair set back, and her bangs framing loosely in that annoying way she liked because it made her look 'Nashi', and her cute *cough* annoying *cough* lip that she was nibbling on, and her chocolate brown eyes-

Okay, she just said something. Abort!! Mission!! Abort!!

"Yes?" he blinked. God, was he pathetic or what?

"I saidddd," she drawled, "I have only one piece left." She twirled it around her slender fingers. Damn seductress. "And I really do like this flavour, so-" Without a word of warning, she popped it in her mouth.

She popped it in her mouth.

She popped-

She popped-

SHE POPPED IT IN HER MOUTH?!

"Did you just eat it in front of me?" He gaped at her.

Her hazel eyes narrowed, "Uh, yes? Sorry bub."

Okay, Storm Fullbuster did not fight a possibly rabid Chihuahua, escape a bunch of Rune Knights and climb a wall just to be defeated this easily. This was another way the universe wanted him to prove his worth.

Oh, only for you Fiore gum.

Way two, here I come.

And then he kissed her.

..........

..........

..........

Okay, so he might have lied. Maybe he was kind of looking for a reason to kiss the pinkette too. And damnnnnnn, did he not regret it.

Papers rustled in the wind from when she'd dropped them in shock. He cradled her face tenderly, keeping his eyes open to admire her flushed face and half lidded eyes (And also to make sure he'd be ready when she decided to sucker punch him) and lightly sucked on her lower lip.

Oh fuck, she just moaned. He counted his blessings and maybe her freckles too as his tongue nudged her own and they fought for dominance. She tasted like cinnamon and apple and strawberry. (Was this how the forbidden fruit tasted like? If so, he'd dive headfirst into that pile of- was it apples? Not strawberries? Strawberries...)

Her hands were now gripping his forearms. He grinned into the kiss, aware of the effect he now had on the pinkette. Hopefully his. If she'd like.

Back!! To!! Mission!!

Right! He swiped the gum from her and broke the kiss, pausing for a few seconds as she struggled to catch her breath (Hoe!! He!! Finally!! Did!! That!!) He stroked her lip gently with his thumb, making her breath hitch. She still hadn't opened her eyes.

Time for the quick getaway. "OKAY! BUH-BYE BABE!" He kissed her forehead and rushed in the guildhall like a man possessed.

He actually did it! Fuck yes! Also Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Wait, why wasn't she chasing him?

He paused and turned to face the door. His guildmates stared at him curiously.

One second. Two.

"STORM FULLBUSTER, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!" She bellowed out, and he winced, sending a prayer above as he ran, once again.

.............

[polar534]

Slumber Party... OF DOOM!

So. Here is my submission for @johnnysfire ‘s TOH Prompt challenge. For anyone who doesn’t know the prompt chosen was “Evil.”

I asked my lovely friends from discord whether I should go emotional or lighthearted with this and they said lighthearted, so here we are. It was actually really really fun to take a topic like evil and twist it to something fun and hopefully fluffy. I had to keep a lot of things shorter then what I would’ve liked to meet the word count (spoiler alert, I still went a little over), so one day I do plan on fixing this up and making it an actual one shot, detailing the game and everything. Until then, enjoy the read! My idea going in? 

Haunted Boardgame:

(EDIT: Um so Tumblr ate and spat out some paragraphs at random the first time I posted... so hopefully everything is in its correct order. Yikes.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Pillows?" 

"Check."

"Blankets."

"Check!"

"Hot chocolate?"

3 sets of eyes turned to the green-haired witch sitting in the corner. Amity Blight was currently too busy staring at the glow that inexplicably seemed to surround Luz as she sounded off the ingredients for her perfect 'Slumber Party' to notice her companions all staring at her.

"..."

Amity's eyes shifted only slightly to the left as her ear twitched, finally noticing the silence and the fact that everyone was staring at her.

Wait.

Everyone was staring at her.

"Oh um..." Amity looked around panicked, flushing red as she realized she had completely zoned out. She quickly analyzed the scene. Willow had wrapped a fluffy blanket around herself as Gus clutched a pillow excitedly to his chest.

Right. The checklist. Refusing to look at Luz (to avoid any further embarrassment or lapses in attention), Amity quickly reached out and snatched her sound-off item. Only barely remembering what it was at the last moment, Amity somehow saved herself from the splash of scalding liquid that flew out of her mug.

"Hot chocolate, acquired!" She grinned forcibly and altogether too nervously.

Finally risking a glance up to her crush she realized that Luz was giggling, the human's eyes closed as she snicked softly against her hands.

Amity's ears pressed flat against her head as Willow chuckled to her left.

"Well that would be Amity for 'check.'" The plant witch giggled, shifting her body to face Luz excitedly. "So. What happens now?"

"Yes, what new human traditions are you going to show us? I'm so excited!!" Gus squeaked happily, crushing the pillow in arms.

Luz grinned. "Just a little more patience my friend. We've got to start this off correctly. So… if everyone would grab their cocoa, probably a little more gentler then Amity over there, then I'll begin the toast to make this the best slumber party ev-"

THUMP THUMP

Luz stopped short as all those in attendance whipped around to face the door. Amity was finally able to unhunch her shoulders and stare with the rest of her friends at the mysterious knock at the door. The human was inquisitive herself.

"Luz, I thought you said there was supposed to be no one home tonight?" Amity questioned her curiously, cocking her head slightly to the side.

Luz's brow furrowed as she got up.

"There isn't anyone home tonight."

The entire room seemed to hold it's breath as Luz approached the door and pausing for what had to be dramatic effect, opened it sharply.

"HAH! GOT YOU… absolutely nothing…"

Amity peered around Luz's body to see exactly what was going on only to be met with the same sight and disappointment. An empty hallway.

Glancing both ways in the doorframe, the human shrugged nonchalantly as she went to close the door.

"Wait!" Gus cried from behind all of them. Flinging the pillow away from him and into Willow's stomach, he jumped up and dived underneath Luz to swipe something up from the ground.

Holding it proudly over his head both him and Luz marched back into the room, the bedroom door closing softly behind them. Willow and Amity leaned in close as Gus dropped the mysterious object to the ground with a soft and dramatic thump.

"What… is it?" Willow asked curiously, inspecting what looked to be a black rectangular box that lay before them.

"Is this part of the slumber party?" Gus asked curiously as Luz picked up the box and gave it a small shake.

"Not that I'm aware of. Let's open it!" The human said excitably, turning the box over to rip it open.

"Wait!" Amity yelped, grabbing Luz by the arm to stop her. Realizing what she was doing, Amity immediately dropped the contact, blushing profusely as she pointed to a small piece of paper that had fluttered to the ground.

"A note!!" Luz's eyes twinkled, causing the blushing witch to somehow go even redder. "Amity, you should read it for us!"

"What?!" Amity choked in surprise. "Why me?!"

"You found it! Besides you have a nice voice!" Luz explained casually, shaking the box slightly and holding it up to her ear.

Amity found it difficult to breathe as she shakily grabbed the note and held it in front of her, Willow and Gus scooting forward in excitement. Trying to ignore the thundering of her heartbeat in her chest and the full attention of the room, Amity glanced down at the note.

"Dear Sleeping Party attendants! You have been called upon to vanquish the evil from within this board! Inside you'll find what seems to be a normal board game, but is actually a prison for a very powerful and evil spirit! The only way to keep it's villainy contained is to play and win the game. The world is counting on you. Good luck! Mwehehehehehe."

Amity frowned and reread the note to herself. The world? That seemed farfetched to say the least. Where did this box even come from? Who sent it to them? Looking up Amity saw the stars dancing in Luz's eyes. Her crush was sold. Gus was practically buzzing beside her.

"I've heard of objects that could be bound with spirits before, but never like this!" He babbled excitedly.

"I have! You know how many human stories are filled with things like this? How long I've been wanting to do this?!" Luz grinned, finally figuring out how to open the box.

As the top lid slid off, a cheap and busted old board fell to the ground with a cloud of dust. Flipping the box over, a pile of cards, dice and one rather large hour glass spilled out as Luz gave it one final shake. Willow automatically went to organize everything and flipping the board over Amity saw a long and complicated maze pattern. The entire board seemed to be black, with the path cutting along through it a dull, brownish red. It seemed like each square had one of 3 icons sprinkled randomly throughout. In the very, very center of the board there was some sort of design. Amity reached forward and brushed the dust and dirt away from it as Luz and Gus talked excitedly above her.

The chatter quickly faded as everyone's eyes slid to the symbol that Amity had just uncovered. It was carved into the board itself, the deep grooves of the design painted in a faded and chipped white. Luz stared curiously while Gus, Willow and Amity all exchanged a concerned look. The design was simple, a small circle, with 4 tight loops surrounding it in all 4 cardinal directions, connecting in a diamond pattern in the very center of the circle.

The Witch's Knot.

Luz looked up at the plant witch curiously, one eyebrow raised as Amity swallowed the lump that was quickly growing in her throat.

"Oooh. That's elegant." Luz cooed.

"It's not elegant Luz…" Willow breathed quietly.

"That's," Amity pointed at the symbol, "a witch's knot. It's a symbol used to ward off evil."

Luz turned her head down to the board game and nodded. "Oh I get it, because of the evviiiilll theme this game has going on right?" She chuckled lightheartedly. When no one responded in kind, the human became quiet, her grin slowly slipping off her face.

"No. You don't understand. The Witch's Knot isn't just some superstition or tradition. In the Boiling Isles it had been used as a spell, carved to literally seal away evil. It hasn't been used in centuries though." Amity explained further, staring at the ancient white symbol. A cold feeling crept up her back.

Maybe there really was something to this game.

"Well, that makes what I'm about to say next, something that I have wanted to say forever by the way, a little more somber…" Luz gulped as she grabbed the dice Willow had set aside. The human tossed them into the air, and as they all watched the cubes crash down, she spoke again.

"Let the game… begin."

***

Despite the incredibly dramatic and powerful gesture, Luz had no idea how to play the game, none of them did. Luckily for the companions, Willow eventually found the directions taped to the inside lid of the box Luz had tossed aside. They were scribbled out in child-like handwriting but they were detailed enough to understand:

- Rolling the dice will move your character that many steps forward. On the board there are 3 different symbols. These represent your obstacles, fail to complete them and you lose your life. The only way to reverse this death is for a living player to revive you by taking a detour off the fastest route. Be warned, choosing this path will waste precious time and you will be risking your own life. You may only revive one player per game.

- Each player must choose a small token to represent themselves on the board. You will work together with those around you to overcome each obstacle in your path to the sigil. The goal is to reach the end with at least one player still standing to revive the The Witch's Knot protecting us from the evil.

- You may not begin the game until you have flipped the hour glass. If the last grain drains from the timer and you have not reached the end, evil will be unleashed.

-The Board itself is enchanted to tell if the players are worthy. It will be the judge and jury for the challenges you complete.

[ ~ ] Draw a blue card and cast the correct type of magic listed on it at the board. If you fail to cast the correct spell you lose your life.

Below are the symbols you will encounter on your quest:

[ + ] Draw a pink card and complete the challenge listed upon it. If you fail to meet this challenge you lose your life.

[ * ] Draw a green card. Answer the question on it correctly to move forward. If you get it wrong you lose your life.

Now having read through the rules, everyone seemed a lot more hesitant to start.

- When your token reaches the end, the correct lines to reseal the evil will appear. Read them aloud in a strong and clear voice.

"This seems like a bad idea." Amity echoed the thoughts of everyone in the room. Her amber eyes flicked up and caught Luz's warm brown ones. The human gave her a shaky smile.

"Come on Ami," Amity had to remind herself to keep breathing at the idea of her nickname. "It will be fun. Besides… I'm not exactly itching to find out what happens if we don't play." The human admitted quietly. Taking a deep breath, she grabbed the dice.

They had all chose board pieces to represent themselves from Luz's large collection of knickknacks. Luz was a small figure of Azura while Amity was Hecate. Gus found himself a tiny rubber chameleon toy while Willow fittingly found a small plastic flower. Each kid seemed to fidget with their tokens as Luz looked at them each in turn. Nodding, the human set her figure down on the start square. Immediately a buzzing sound filled the room and the dull red path illuminated itself. The symbols now glowed their respective card color.

"Well. That seems ominous." Luz laughed nervously, her eyes growing wide as the light from the path traveled towards the Witch's Knot, as it reached the chipped white paint, the symbol flashed, changing it's paint to a bright angry red. "Scratch that. That is just ominous. Is my soul about to be consumed? Did I just sell my soul to a board game?"

Willow set her piece down next, a small ring of light forming around it as the board recognized yet another player.

"Well, I wasn't really using my soul for anything important at the moment. Let's do this." The plant witch grinned and Amity watched as Luz's confidence swiftly returned.

Gus whooped and set his own piece on the board earning him a wide smile from both of his friends. Soon all sets of eyes drifted to Amity who was staring down at the note that had been originally taped to the box. She couldn't shake the horrible suspicion that someone was setting them up. Looking down at the now glowing and obviously magic board, it was clear they were already too far into the trap to back out now. Taking a deep breath she placed Hecate down right next to Azura.

"Alright. Let's do this." Amity nodded, swiftly grabbing the hour glass sitting next to her. "Is uh, everyone ready?"

"Oooh! Can I say it? Amity pleaaaseeee?" Luz jumped in suddenly, startling the green-haired witch into nearly dropping the time piece. Resetting her heartbeat, Amity handed the hourglass to Luz who grinned widely.

"Alright. This time for real. Let the game begin." The human announced as she flipped it and begun their countdown.

The dice magically floated over to Luz as soon as the first grain of sand hit the bottom of the glass. It was clear who was going first. Tossing them out in front of her Luz rolled a 3 and 5. As she reached to move her figure, it zoomed away from her hand, darting forward 8 spaces by itself. The symbol beneath it glowed a bright pink. A challenge space.

Luz grabbed a card, and the race against time began.

Gus was the first to die, his token being swallowed by the board itself after he lost his balance 2 seconds into a 5 second handstand.

Amity was the next to lose to the game. Her concentration on a fireball spell having been completely shattered by Luz's supportive hand laying on her shoulder. Amity knew it wasn't her simply being startled like Luz apologized profusely for, but there was NO way she would be explaining that today. Not over a stupid board game at least. Fate of the world or not.  

Luz and Willow were about 3/4th through the path leading to the sigil when just a few spaces ahead the path split in two. Written in very faint lettering was the words: "Forest of Revival" by the detour path. Looking down it, the companions saw every single square through the 'forest' was lined with knowledge cards. The path itself eventually weaved back to the sigil, but was easily twice as long and packed with symbols.

If they wanted to revive someone it would be a struggle. Deciding to move forward Willow rolled her dice and landed on a spell square.

"Summon a small abomination to pick up your token off the board."

The group fell silent. Willow had never been good at abominations. She slumped in defeat.

Amity had to speak up, the painful memory of her teasing hanging over the entire room.

"You've got this." She said quietly, looking anywhere but Willow.

Luz's eyes flicked worriedly towards Amity, before they turned back to Willow.

"Amity's right. I've seen you do much cooler then a little abomination." Luz cheered helpfully.

"Thanks you two, but I think we both know what happens now." Willow admitted holding a hand up and drawing a pristine circle.

The resulting pile of barely sentient goop unsurprisingly earned a negative reaction from the board and Willow's token disappeared.

Luz wasted no time grabbing the dice for the next turn. They only had about 20 minutes left.

"I'm going to revive someone." She announced, rolling the dice and moving her token into the empty space before the forest.

"Wait, Luz! The forest is full of knowledge checks. Chances are you're going to get something you haven't learned yet. And we won't be able to help you." Amity spoke up quickly.

"Yeah, well you can't really help me if you all are dead right? Look. I'll be fine. There's 12 spaces to the revive square. If I roll double sixes, I'm there."

"That's a pretty big IF Luz..." Willow said worriedly, glancing over at the hourglass.

Turns out they didn't have to be worried at all. As double sixes appeared on the dice, Azura shot forward safely through the forest and landed directly on the revive square.

"I'm reviving Amity." Luz announced decisively as the square began to glow a bright yellow and Hecate appeared beside Azura.

"Me? Why?"

"Because statistically you are the most obvious choice. Top Student and well versed in multiple different magic tracks." Gus nodded, tapping his chin thoughtfully. "Good choice Luz!"

Willow merely looked away in shame and Amity felt guilt twist at her heart.

"Well that's not exactly true, but I figure since all of us are always getting up to magic mischief that Amity should get to be a bigger part of this adventure. Plus, historically we have made a pretty good team." Luz beamed, somehow melting the tension of the entire room with her words.

She practically melted Amity face too as heat rushed to the witch’s cheeks at the compliment.

They resumed the game, getting further and further through the forest. As the sand ran down in the hour glass, Hecate and Azura inched closer towards the sigil and the evil within the board.

"1234...5...6... and 7. Nice! Just enough!!" Luz counted excitedly as the board moved her token into the final square before the Witch's Knot. She glanced worriedly at Amity who was still several spaces away and then at the hour glass with just a sliver of sand left.

They were running out of time.

Luckily the board seemed to recognize Luz's finish as a team victory and Hecate was pulled straight to the end, standing alongside her friend/rival Azura.

Two white cards appeared in front of Luz and Amity.

"Ok. So... now we just read whatever's on this card and the evil gets re-sealed?" Luz asked uncertainly, fidgeting with her card.

Amity simply stared at the white card still laying in front of her, dread building in her chest. If there was ever a time for the trap to spring... it would be now. Haunted objects like this often came with a curse, especially here in the Boiling Isles. The ancient symbol currently pulsating red in the center of the board reminded Amity that there was a chance that whatever 'evil' this board contained may be far too old and powerful to simply be sealed away by two witches in training...

"Yep. And hurry! There's not much time left!" Gus's panicked voice jolted Amity out of her thoughts. Taking a deep breath, Amity snatched the card up and flipped it over, almost completely in sync with Luz.

"To defeat the evil within in this board, I hereby announce that-" The two read off in unison.

"... King is the greatest of all time."

"... Luz is a buttface."

The entire room fell silent as the two finished the 'spell' causing the Witch's Knot in the middle to flash a bright, blinding blue before the entire board went dim.

From the doorway the companions could all hear a malicious cackling.

Amity turned around slowly, only to see the resident demon of the Owl House rolling around on his back, laughing.

"YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN YOUR FACES! Oooooh. Oh nooooo! The evil of the board is going to get usssss. Wheeeeheheehehe."

"King!!" Luz reprimanded angrily, but the smile on her face gave away her true feelings. "You know, if you wanted us to play a board game you made, you could've just asked!"

The little demon pushed himself off the floor and wiped his eyes. He walked to the center of the board and kicked over the hourglass, seconds away from running out of sand.

"Psssh. Like I'd want to be involved in your silly little 'Sleep Party' thing anyways. Not that I got an invite or anything..." King grumbled.

Amity felt bad for the little guy, even if the game had them all stressed over nothing, he just wanted to feel included. Reaching forward hesitantly, knowing she didn't have the best relationship with the demon, Amity gently scooped him into her arms and coddled him.

And to both of their surprise, The King of Demons let her.

"Besides, it's not my game anyways. I just wrote those last two cards." King continued, crossing his arms defiantly from his position in Amity's arms.

Luz frowned. "But if you didn't make it then... who did?"

"I don't know. Eda just had it laying around. I found it a couple of days ago and planned this spectacular and amazing prank to pull on you guys for not inviting me. And it workkkeedd! Hah!"

Amity tensed. Nobody knew who made it? A board this enchanted had to have been made by someone.

"No, that's not right. There has to be some sort of clue, right?" Luz frowned, looking around at her friends.

"I don't know, I didn't look." The demon king shrugged before stretching out and curling tightly into Amity's chest.

"Try flipping it over? Maybe there's a name or something. That's what my dad's always do to our stuff in case it gets lost." Willow suggested helpfully.

Everyone nodded as Luz tentatively reached over and flipped the board over. On the back, faintly scratched into the cheap cardboard, were two initials and a small inscription. They had found their answer.

L + E - Vanquishing evil together. Forever.

The End

[samcrobae]

Off Limits, 3

Gif Credit: @seventhdevil

Some EZ FILTH BABY, 😈 this is also not proof read. Hope you like it!

—————————————

You were watching Jersey Shore reruns when there was a knock at your door. You had on biker shorts and an oversized shirt. You opened the door and EZ was on the other end of it holding up a bottle of Tequila. “Well I never thought I’d see the day Ezekiel Reyes takes a drink of anything!” You joke and move to the side motioning for him to come in.

“Yeah well I’m a free man for the next 3 days thanks to you.” He sets the bottle down on the kitchen counter and turns to find you pouring a glass of your favorite wine. He comes up from behind you and pushed your hair to one side before letting his lips find your neck and presses his lips against it in rough and sloppy kisses, and you feel your knees go weak. “Wait. After this episode. It’s the one where snooki and Jenny type up the note to sammi to tell her about Ron.”

EZ makes himself a drink and sits on the couch with you. He listens as you recite the scene word for word. “Wait you’ve already seen this? Why are we watching this?” You look at him confused, “ummmm because this is an iconic episode in the jersey shore series. Seriously where you been?” He chuckles and takes a sip of his drink “I don’t know, prison.”

You down now at your hands, “sorry, I forgot. Why’d you go to prison?” You shift positions now, both feet on the couch, knees bent toward him. “It’s okay, um long story short? I shot a cop.” He waits for you to react, to close off from him, but you didn’t even blink an eye. He went into detail of that night and you listened. Validating his thoughts, emotions, his anger and his guilt.

You had sat and talked and drank for about 4 hours before looking at your phone, “Damn it’s 2 in the morning.... you’re not driving home right?”

He looked at you and then at his empty glass, “I mean I was planning on going home but I’m pretty buzzed not gonna lie.”

“Good. Cus I’m going to bed.” You turned your back to him and lifted your t shirt off and tossed it to the floor, looking back at him as you did. “Are you coming?” He jumped off the couch and set his drink down before following you into your room. He didnt know what it was, maybe the alcohol coursing through his veins or just the feeling of being alone with you right now, but something animalistic and possessive took over, recalling the conversation you had at the clubhouse earlier the day.

“It can’t happen again.”

“Fine then I’ll find someone who will let it happen.”

You start walking towards your dresser to change into something to sleep in when he reaches forward and grabs you by the back of your neck, pulling you flush against his chest, a gasp escaping your lips.

“You think I forgot the shit you said to me earlier? You’re gonna find someone else who will let it happen? I don’t think you want someone else. You can try and tease me all you want but we know it’s true. I told you I wasnt done with you.” You clench you’re thighs together as you feel wetness in your panties begin to pool. You reach your hand back and try to stroke him over his jeans but he moves your hand away.

“No, you don’t get to touch, it’s my turn.” He walks you toward the bed, his hand still at the back of your neck. He turns you around and there’s a devilish, dark look in his eye replacing the usual softness he normally shows. “Go sit up by your pillows.”

You do as your told, sat at the top of the bed, near your pillows and watch as begins to strip. Your eyes fixed on his abs and muscular biceps and all you can think about is gripping them as he fucks you into oblivion. When he’s completely naked he stands at the end of the bed pumping himself as you watch and lick your lips in anticiaptaion, the instant sexual tension that had built since you met him just the day before was unbearable. He climbs into the bed and takes his shirt and wraps it around your wrist, then wrapping the other end to your headboard , tying them together loose enough to not hurt you but tight enough you couldn’t wiggle out of it.

“Ezekiel.. what are you doing?”

“This is what you wanted right? You think you’re gonna suck my dick last night, then come to clubhouse and tease me, grind up against me this morning and then not get what you wanted?” He insterted his hands into the waistband of your shorts and panties and removed them in one swift motion and spread your knees, exposing yourself to him and he could see how wet you were. He trailed gentle kisses up your thighs, replaced by bites then licked the skin before repeating the motions. You tried to buck your hips forward but he pulled away, “what? What do you want?”

“You. I want you Ezekiel” you say, your breath ragged. He grins at you and dips his head down and delivers an agonizingly slow lick up your center and you feel your legs go weak, he did it again and again and all you could do was whimper. He dove his face into you hungrily, flicking his tongue against your clit and your legs shook. He added a finger into you, then another, never taking his lips off your sensitive bud. You thrust your hips to meet each of his thrusts with his fingers and it wasn’t long til you were moaning his name as your orgasm washed over you. You were a moaning mess, and all you could do was beg for him to untie you.

He was amused at how you squirmed at his every touch, how you were the one in control up until this very moment. He trailed kisses up your belly then when he got to your breasts he took a nipple into his mouth, roughly sucking on your skin while rolling your other nipple between his fingers, once again you tried to buck your hips towards him, begging for any kind of friction and he laughed.

“EZ, please... let me feel you.” He reached up and undid the shirt and your hands instantly fell to his biceps, your lips meeting his. You wrapped your legs around his waist, desperate to feel something and he effortlessly flipped you over so that you were on top. You leaned back, your breasts on full display and his hands come up to grab and squeeze at them. You were absolutely blown away at this side of him, but you loved every second of it and needed to feel him inside you. You raised yourself slightly and slowly sank down onto him, a sigh escaping your lips at the way he felt as he filled you completely.

You rolled your hips then rested your hands on his chest, his hands coming to grip your ass and you started bouncing up and down on him. “That’s it babygirl fuck me...does that feel good?”

“So fucking good, shit....” you whined and you leaned forward to rest your hands on the head board and picked up your rhythm, his hips coming up to meet yours.

“EZ... fuck you feel so good... oh my god...”

“You’re gonna make me cum already, slow down..” he said in between breaths. You could feel his thrusts become unsteady but you couldn’t help it. He felt so good and made you feel so full, and at this angle, he was hitting just the right spots and you didn’t want to stop.

“Y/N, slow down.... shit....I’m cumming..." was all he could get out as you rode him faster.

“EZ... EZ.... yes yes yessss.." your 2nd orgasm rushed over you and you could feel him twitch inside you, costing your walls with his cum as you slowed yourself down, letting yourself fall forward onto him.

He was outta breath and slowly moved his hips so he slid out of you. “Holy shit you’re crazy ...” you laid next to him forms few minutes before finally getting up to get a shirt from your dresser when you felt his hand on your wrist. “No, no clothes , get back in the bed. I want more.”

————————————-

The rest of the weekend went the same, he went home and grabbed some clothes and things to have at your place the next 2 days and you couldn’t get enough of each other. The connection was unmatched, the sex was on another level, and you were happy spending the weekend indoors moaning and screaming his name all hours of the day and night.

Monday morning came and you woke tangled in each others arms, under your sheets. You peppered soft kisses on his chest and his hand came up to rest on your head. “Do you have to go back today? Can’t you just spend the day here with me again?" You ask.

“Shit I wish, but the guys get back today, I gotta head into the clubhouse to get everything set up. Wanna come with? Wait speaking of, what time is it?” He reaches for his phone and checks the time, then saw he missed 4 calls from Angel, 2 texts, and a couple missed calls from coco. “Fuck, they’re back.’I gotta go. I’m gna shower.”

You got out of bed and got dressed, and went into the kitchen to start your day. 15 minutes later he was out of the shower, kutte in hand and you both heard pounding on your front door. EZ was closest to the door so he put his hand on the knob and opened it.

“Good morning. Somehow I knew I’d find your ass here. Get your ass to the yard. You’re late.” Angel said as he leaned against the door frame. EZ shot you an apologetic look and walked outside.

“Did you shower here? Wait hold on, were you here all fuckin weekend?! Shit EZ what the fuck.”

“Can we just go please ?” EZ shot back.

Angel drapes an arm over his shoulder, “Yeah come on, Bishop wants to know where you been.”

——————————-

Tag list: @starrynite7114 @briannab1234 @gemini0410 @ifoundmyhappythought @briana-mishell24 @blackmissfrizzle @carlaangel86 @woahitslucyylu @marvelmaree @thickemadame @wrcn9fvlcver @sweetcannolicarisi @jadert15

[namorres]

BE QUIET  ∞  E. MIKAELSON

wc |  2.7k

warnings |  canon-type violence? but it’s a short lil cheesy fic so no worries

notes: this is based off a prompt from this list, “if i were you, i’d be quiet” that i randomly picked & then i knew i had to write it so here’s that

masterlist

Y/n had come to love the eldest of the Original siblings, and if she ever said she regretted it, she’d be lying to herself. Indeed, when he’d first revealed all that he was to her, she was stricken with a sense of absolute confusion, asking questions and being taken aback at the idea that her boyfriend was an immortal bloodsucker she’d only heard about in movies. They were definitely supposed to have long fangs and big noses and slicked back black hair with horribly receding hairlines — honestly, they all were supposed to look like Dracula. 

And they were supposed to look like that because they were supposed to be scary bedtime stories, not real creatures that walked the Earth in search of a blood fix, nor were they supposed to resemble people, with humanity and the urge to create empires and be out with the real world and develop connections.

But there one was, standing in her kitchen after an eventful late night, shirtless and not as pale as she’d imagined, telling her his whole story. He’d even let her see, placing his palm to her head and speaking through the memories as they flashed in her mind. She felt everything that came with them, every bit of emotion, every blade of grass between her hands and at the soles of her feet. When he pulled away, she’d asked in a tiny voice, “How did you do that?” 

He’d laughed at her, a small chuckle, looking at her with curious brown eyes through dark lashes, “That’s what you took away from everything I just bore to you? A curiosity for my abilities?”

Her brows furrowed, her lips parted as she thought, “Was I supposed to take something else away from it?” She tilted her head to the side when his gaze fell away, landing on the kitchen floor. Closing the small gap between them, she placed a cool palm on his warm chest, “Elijah,” her voice was softer than the breeze of the AC, “I’m not afraid of you. Your brother?” She debated for a moment, looking away and then smiling softly, “Maybe. But you? Never.” 

After that, he’d asked her if she would be willing to be with him more. She knew he feared her having this knowledge, she knew that he didn’t want her to ever come in harm’s way. But she also knew he was going to let her make her own decisions, give her the freedom of figuring out what to do next. Her answer to his request was a simple yes, and from then on, it was like a letter with a wax seal.

The two had been together three years, now, and she never let the idea of eternity with him escape her mind. But that didn’t matter much right now — she was happy and human, and she intended to keep it that way until it was sure that she would have forever to spend with him. 

All of that, though, led her to where she’d been then — in Elijah’s bed, tangled in the sheets, with a distinct lack of her boyfriend. He was likely down in the study, mulling over books and his mother’s grimoire, trying to solve another problem for his little brother that was likely never his own. She admired that about him, truly. But she also detested the idea that Klaus would always come before even Elijah in the vampire’s mind. 

Sighing, she turned so that she was flat on her back, staring up at the ceiling. She debated, momentarily, just going to sleep and hoping to wake up with Elijah next to her, but she knew that wasn’t going to happen. If he didn’t sleep, she didn’t either; if it did so happen that she fell asleep, it was because she simply could not outrun exhaustion, for she was no supernatural being. 

Taking her bottom lip between her teeth, she thought a second more, then shook her head. Being alone wasn’t going to work. Twisting so that she lay on her side, she grabbed her phone from the nightstand and checked the time — 3:32 AM. “Of course,” she laughed to herself, pulling it closer to her face so that she could see what she was doing as she tapped the phone icon, scrolled to Elijah’s contact, and called. A moment or two of silence, then the dialtone came, followed by an intense vibration from the other nightstand across the mattress. “Of course!” She was in a fit of giggles at this point — luck would not be on her side tonight.

Sitting up, she threw her phone to the wayside and moved to get out of bed, sucking a breath through her teeth at the cold air nipping her legs. A shiver ran through her spine, but before she stood fully, a sense of unease settled in the pit of her stomach. Why had it been so cold? The window was shut, and she knew it was a summer night. The AC was a good one, but it wasn’t that good. 

Looking over her shoulder, her narrowed eyes traced the folds in the sheets of her bed before traveling up the wall. Then she stopped, completely frozen. By the window stood a figure shrouded in black, his head ducked and his hands gloved. Her mouth opened to yell out for her boyfriend, but not a sound made it through. A hand flew to her throat, and she tried to make some kind of sound, anything, but nothing was coming of it. 

“If I were you,” the figure spoke, his words growled from his teeth, “I’d stay quiet.”

She searched frantically around the room for something that could help her, that she could throw or use as a defense. A knife sat on the bookshelf by the door, reflecting the dull light of the lamp, and she raced to get it. However, the man whispered something in a language she didn’t understand, and she flew back against the wall, held up by her throat. Her fingers clawed at the invisible hand, scratching her own skin instead and leaving the area burning.

“You’re going to tell me where he keeps the grimoires,” the man said, stepping closer and starting to raise his eyes to meet hers. “But you won’t speak. You see, if he hears you, I’ll have to leave, and I won’t leave,” his wrist twisted, the grip on her throat impossibly tighter, “until I have what I came here for.” 

Y/n continued to struggle against the magic, even though she knew there was truly no point. Her foot swung out then struck the wall with a loud thud, and the man, which she could safely assume was a witch, cringed. With one hand directed at her, he moved his other and hovered it over the doorframe, murmuring something before turning his attention back to the woman strung up on the wall.

“See,” he said, “he’ll have heard that. And he’ll likely wonder what it was.” He stepped closer, dragging her down the wall so that she was eye level with him, “And he’ll come for you. A pathetic little human who can’t defend herself.” 

Y/n attempted to whimper against the strength of his hold, her toes numbing and her eyes wanting to close and pop from her head at the same time. He was crushing her windpipe, and if he succeeded, she wouldn’t come back. He was right — she was human. She got no second chances.

“Y/n? Are you alright?” She heard from down the hallway, starting to vigorously shake her head. Tears escaped her eyes and she tried her best to keep struggling, but her body was weak and her vision was spotty and there was absolutely nothing she could do in this moment except watch. “Y/n?”

Elijah was at the doorframe now, looking in without noticing her against the wall closest to the door. He wouldn’t have thought to look there, not at first. Instead, his eyes were trained on the bed, where there were crumpled sheets, and an absence of his girlfriend. “Y/n,” he said again, turning his head and looking straight at her, “Y/n, are you in here?”

Her eyes went wide, and the witch man below her smirked devilishly, but did not speak. He had used a spell to cloak them, though she wasn’t sure for why. Even in her hazy state, she was aware of what he came for, and if he thought she was going to be able to give it to him, why would he make them invisible to Elijah in the first place? 

Her eyes fluttered as the witch’s magical grip twisted so that it was pressing against a different part of her throat, and her arms flopped to the side, smacking against the wall. Elijah’s eyes searched the area for some explanation, but he couldn’t see any reason why there were sounds coming from the room — if no one was in there, where were the sounds coming from?

Then he stepped in, and she could hear a breath leave the witch’s chest — he’d wanted Elijah to do exactly that. With a small chant, Y/n watched the vampire whip around, staring at the witch, then locking eyes with her. Her eyes were hooded, almost closed, and her skin had turned a rather sickly red, all the blood rushing to her face and throat. 

“Good evening, Elijah,” the witch’s tone was cocky, so confident that he had the upper hand, “it’s so nice to see you on such a lovely evening.”

“Well I’d invite you in, but it seems you’ve made yourself quite,” his eyes left his girlfriend’s, his head tilting to the side, “comfortable.” 

“Ah, yes,” the grip on her throat loosened, just enough for her to be able to take in a labored breath, the tingling in her body stopping just at the top of her kneecaps. “You have a truly wonderful home, I must admit.”

Elijah gave him a tight smile, one hand tucking itself into his suit pants. The other hung by his side, cuffed sleeve brushing against his hip as he looked down at the sheets, then locked eyes with the witch again, “I would love to have a proper conversation with you, but it seems you’ve got my,” he breathed in, gesturing to her, “Y/n stuck against a wall. Would you mind bringing peace to my mind and letting her down?”

The witch returned the grin, lowering her so that her feet hit the ground, then letting his grip on her throat go. With no blood in her limbs, she collapsed, gasping out for much-needed oxygen. Elijah’s lip twitched, lips parting as his tongue darted out across them. “You said to let her down,” the witch gave a shake of his head then gestured to her weak form, “I obliged. Now, I never said I would release her from my spells.” He shook his finger at Elijah, backstepping and lifting Y/n by the arm, then throwing her to the bed. “So, until I get what I came for, she won’t be able to utter a word, nor will she be able to move from that spot!”

Y/n sputtered soundlessly against the mattress, falling into the sheets and taking deep breaths. Her limbs were burning, her eyes were heavy and her vision was spotted and dizzy. Elijah stepped closer to the mattress, fingers steepling on top of it. Lazily, her hand reached for his, weak fingers wrapping themselves around three of his own. He took in a breath, then gave another tight-lipped smile, “And what is it, pray tell, that you came for?”

“Esther’s grimoires,” the other man’s tone had darkened, his lip pulling into a snarl and his brows drawing upward in challenge. 

“Oh? Is that so?” Elijah asked, stepping forward and feeling Y/n’s grip slip away from his. “Well, right this way.” 

The witch looked him up and down, blinking like the vampire was stupid, “You think I’ll fall for that? You think I’m an idiot?”

Elijah’s hand untucked itself, finger twirling the daylight ring that sat on his middle finger, “I prefer to keep my opinions of certain people to myself. Makes for easier negotiation.”

The witch let out a growl, stepping forward and closing a distance between him and the vampire. Elijah’s chin lifted as he stared down his nose at the slightly shorter man, taking in breath. “The grimoires. Now.”

With a lifted brow, Elijah looked away, then over his shoulder to Y/n, whose face was buried in the sheets, eyes closed. With one more look at the witch, he snarled, then pushed his hand forward. His fingers passed the skin, the muscle, the ribcage, and gripped around the heart of the witch, holding it with such a grip that if the man moved away, he would move without his organ. 

“I don’t take kindly,” he growled, “to people coming into my home and putting the people I love in danger. Now,” he squeezed, and the man gasped out, eyes wide with fear, “I assume you’re a smart man. Or, rather, smart enough to know when you’re no longer going to achieve your goal. Am I correct?”

The witch didn’t move to answer, and truly, Elijah’s question was entirely rhetorical. 

“But,” he breathed in, his eyes moved down to his arm in the man’s chest, “smart doesn’t describe your actions tonight. And for that,” he gave a thoughtful frown and nod, “you lose your life.”

Then he pulled his hand out, gripping the witch’s heart and watching as the man stood still for a moment, then fell to the ground in a mess of blood and coats. Looking at the heart in his hand, he let it drop and shook his head in disgust, wishing now that he’d had his handkerchief on him. The blood was truly gross to look at. 

Without much other thought, he turned around and walked to Y/n on the bed, leaning on the mattress with one knee and touching her with the hand that lacked blood. Pulling her face from the covers, his pinky rested on her pulse, weak but there, and the rest of his palm cupped her cheek. The blood was returning to its proper places, and any spell the witch had cast was now void, seeing as it depended on his life force and Elijah had ever-so-kindly stripped him of such a burden.

Letting go of her face, he pushed himself off the bed and walked into the bathroom, washing his hand. He unbuttoned his dress shirt, pulling it off his torso and discarding it to the basket of dirty laundry. Next was his shoes, then his socks, then his belt and pants, which were changed out for a pair of shorts for the time being. He then walked back out to Y/n, picking her up and fixing her position on the mattress. 

She stirred a few minutes later, after Elijah had tucked himself into the sheets, turned off the lamps and held her form against his chest. “‘Lijah?” She asked in a small voice, drawing in a heavy breath, “I think I just had the worst dream. Something about a witch and your mom.”

Elijah chuckled lightly, leaning down and placing a soft kiss to her head, “It’s alright, darling. You have nothing to worry about.” She didn’t reply, only tucked herself further into his chest. He situated them so that they lay comfortably, kissed her head once more, then let himself begin to relax. He wasn’t going to sleep, no; if a witch had so easily been able to sneak into the compound and come for Y/n, there was things that had to change. For now, he would stay alert, in case the first witch had come with any friends, and ensure that they would have no way of bringing harm to her. 

The man that lay on his floor would have to be dealt with come morning, however. He was sure Y/n would start to smell something. 

[sanchoyo]

Looks like you’re gonna have to gush some more cuz I meant in general uwu🌸

🌺😌🤟 Always happy to! Okay here’s just some General bnha Thoughts ™ Mostly Lov centric. You asked for them, and you said GUSH about them, so here’s. A Lot! :)

This isn’t a lov one but it’s really funny so I thought I’d put it out there:

-when bnha was first gaining traction on tumblr, it was all art of Tsuyu. I have no idea why. People were talking about the funky frog lesbian superhero anime. Maybe it was just the people I was following, maybe it was a general trend, but I LOVED her design!!! my fav color and frogs r super cute!!! And I already loved superhero media, so I was like. I’ll watch it. For Her. SO. FROPPY IS THE REASON I WATCHED/READ BNHA. I went in thinking she was the protag and I was sooo confused when Izuku was... tbh I still think it’d be more interesting if she was lmaooo aus where? ...seriously if anyone has good aus where this is the case send them LOL

-I don’t actually feel that bad abt what Shigaraki’s doing. I still feel bad for him. I’m this post. yes im an apologist. its not my fault hes sexy and has been running around shirtless. hes a lesbian icon like thor is. I want to touch his hair. hes never done anything wrong in his life. he could kill all might, deku, bakugo, whatever, I’d still be sayin this. I don’t feel bad for gt. like. was anyone genuinely attached to him? lmao

-well u know how spinner’s quirk is just sticking to things? We haven’t seen him use it in canon except like, (1) time iirc?? I think this is probably bc he’s embarrassed about it even in front of the league... I loooove the idea that he gets more comfortable with it around them :”) and also how shigaraki. um. does that falling asleep thing while standing up with his eyes open, canonly? (which I still love lmfao) Imagine someone in the league walking in a dark room, turning on the light n just seeing. Spinner upside down, stuck to the ceiling asleep bc heat rises and its Warmer Up There. (cold blooded thing like tsuyu?? come ON give him a big fuzzy coat and scarf...) and Shigaraki in the center of the room, slouched but still standing, eyes open and motionless. Theyre both sleeping. Whomever sees it just...slowly walks out. LMAO

-Toga roller derby au. No deep thoughts I just think she’d be good at it. 

-Toga 100% is a social butterfly and could befriend anyone if they didn’t just judge the fact she was trying to stab them smh :/ (ok but seriously anytime I see cute friendships with her n the other kids im like :) aw. I feel like her and Camie...would be good friends. Camie feels chill enough to be like ‘ok whatever thats totally fine I forgive you!!’ LMAO we love airheads here)

-HOW DID TOGA GET SO GOOD AT FIGHTING? We know she’s been on the run since middle school or so, but good enough to pin Deku down after he’s been formally trained at a ~hero school~ for a while? (she pinned him TWICE I think, once when his arms were messed up, but, the other time as Camie, so? AND THEN WAS ONE OF THE 100 PEOPLE TO GO THRU TO THE 2ND ROUND OF THAT? even tho she didn’t bc she had to leave) good enough to beat Aizawa in a fight and stab him? A professional hero and teacher for YEARS? Is that seriously just street training??? Can people acknowledge how amazing her combat skills and reflexes are??? More Toga appreciation when?? Also her backstory??? SO subversive and incredible, hate when people reduce her to just a ~typical anime yandere~ :/

-Tomura doing stuff with his hands/fingers to train his quirk!!! And to learn to be careful with it!! obv I’m a Big Fan of him playing piano to do this and video games are prob the canon answer, but like, guitar or any stringed instrument that requires Hands would work too. Or knitting/sewing? EMBROIDERING? ??? Please, let me give you the mental image of him knitting aggressively while mentally scheming, watching a twitch streamer or smth too while doing it. (Doing stuff with your hands is a great way to let your mind come up with creative stuff, that’s how I come up with writing/drawing ideas 70% of the time)

-Tomura actually PREFERS cutesty, relaxing games. I mean, he does fighting and bloody stuff irl, games are a way to relax...he’ll play shooters and gta type games with The Lads, but. on his own?? animal crossing. pokemon. kirby games. mario. zelda. BIG ZELDA FAN (not saying this bc I, personally, am biased, but,) slime rancher, stardew valley, funny simulator games... he really enjoys those :”) God forbid he has a kid bc they’re 100% getting named after a viddy game character unless someone can talk him out of it LOL. Toga and Tomura are that animal crossing /doom meme where she’d be asking for doom and him asking for animal crossing :”)

-Bits and pieces of Before are kinda stuck in Kurogiri’s brain, but like. mostly useless stuff the doctor didn’t care about removing. Like, types of clouds. So Tomura kinda picks up on stuff like that. He can just look at clouds and tell you what type they are because Kurogiri used to take him up to high places in the city and point them out to calm Tomura down from a panic attack when he was younger. He can tell you if the sky looks like it’ll rain with a 80% accuracy rate too. 

-Kurogiri left food out for kitties in the alley beside the bar. They weren’t allowed in for Health Reasons (it IS a bar with sanitation standards!!) And Tomura really wouldn’t stop it or encourage it either way so long as Kurogiri did his job, but occasionally would stand outside with Kurogiri and just watch the kitties from a distance. If any approached he’d go back in (lowkey afraid he’d hurt them by touching them :( ) They kinda kept that between them tho, bc they both Know AFO is a big bag of dicks and no fun

-people have pointed out how similar aizawa and tomura look. this was 100% the intention. tomura has a hatecrush on him. THIS IS SO FUNNY AND HORRIBLY AWKWARD FOR KUROGIRI LMAO

-Sako??? Mr. Dramatic?? Opera fan. Drama kid. Like, obviously, but. Really. He is. I feel like he can speak a dozen languages. I also feel like he used to be an overachiever but got too ambitious. He was def some kind of leader at one point of a diff Group or something that fell apart. I LOVE how creative he is with his quirk and the magician theme??? incredible. I don’t show him enough love but I Love Clowns :o)

-I don’t care what their canon heights are. Spinner and Dabi? short kings. My height hcs are (tallest to shortest) Kurogiri, Twice, Sako (who also has heels on his boots and a tall hat, keep in mind), Tomura, Magne (Tomura and Magne are about the same height imo) Toga, Spinner, Dabi. LISTEN. Dabi has short energy. Sorry. it’s true tho

-This is a semi-popular hc I think bc I KNOW I’ve seen it before, but Dabi having Terrible Vision and needing glasses is so so good. (seriously, with burns THAT close to his eyeballs, how could he not?) 

-he tries to be a tough loner coolguy. you’d think he’d smoke, but I hc his ‘weak constitution’ comes with weak lungs (esp from years of a flame quirk?? inhaling smoke over so much time is SO bad for you, most people who die in fires actually die of smoke inhalation...) so he’s got like, an inhaler, can’t smoke, actually gets carsick, needs glasses, overuses quirk to save friends constantly, likes napping, a little awkward and rude. Tomura put him in charge of the vanguard so he’s smart, and good with strategies too, like a nerd. this is the Dabi I wanna see, not the popular fandom version of him tbh also step on hawks one more time sir :”)

-I wish all the lov fics weren’t?? villain!deku like I said earlier, but also, chatfics? I have nothing against them but most of them are just a bombardment of Memes with NO PLOT!!! Listen. text/chatfics CAN have plot and be an interesting way to tell a story. I almost want to write one just to show what I mean...

I know I’ve said I like spinaraki and blackmagic, but I am a multishipper, so a few ships I don’t talk about that I like that involve the lov in some way:

-toga/any of the 1A girls??? or Camie??? super interesting. ALSO in the radio drama, bakugo’s voice actor said Toga was his favorite girl??? so?? bakugo/toga ?? I WANT TO SEE IT. but specifically my fav dynamic with her is when someone ELSE is the one to like her first, it’s what she deserves.

-Kurogiri/aizawa/mic?? any variety of that is also 👌🏻 I also kinda wanna see kurogiri/all might bc. Dads. COME ON. they bond over ‘well, I raised him, and you want to have a part in his life now?? ok. earn it. prove it. I’ll screen you first’ or something LMAO they’re both genuinely concerned for the boy, and SOOO biased. let them bond.

-WAIT WHERE IS THE MIC/COMPRESS CONTENT. THEYRE BOTH DRAMATIC. ENEMIES TO LOVERS?? HELLO??? SOMEONE?? ANYONE. rarepair hours

-giran/twice is cute. like he was hyping him up so much and so ready to go save him...

-dabi/magne where is the content. when. why not everywhere??? I’ve also seen magne/compress which was cute!! or twice/magne? they’re the big sibs of the lov...

-dabi/spinner?? come ON dabi could get over his learned biases and spend time with him and they could hold hands. I want them to.

-dabihawks. Obviously bc the Drama. yes even still, don’t @ me. (also, shigahawks, seen some REAL interesting fics with it tbh) or spinahawks?? adding hawks to a ship is like adding extra chili powder. makes it SPICY dramatic)

-nine/tomura don’t @ me once again. both kinda afo’s playthings, nine obviously was the test for tomura’s new upgrades...they both love their friends...That Scene in the Flower field </3 hmmm tragicships are fun.

-tomura/mirko. more enemies to lovers. big fan of her and bunnies. remember when he wore bunny ears in bnha smash. (ok its crack but. CUTE.) 

-I’ve also seen shiganatsu and shigafuyu and I’m like. these are cute, but also Dabi’s reaction always makes me cry laugh. so good.

-MOST EVERYONE IN THE LOV IS LGBTQA+!!! heres my personal headcanons:

Toga: pan or bi (CANON BASICALLY)

Magne: transwoman (CANON BABEY) bi, leans towards men. (her crush on dabi in bnha smash... uwu content where)

Shuichi: gets sooooo flustered canonly, I think he’d go for the first person Who Hit On Him (I can see him being the target of those mean pranks where someone says ‘my friend likes you!!’ and the friend is like ‘eww!!’ :(((( ) he’s super hesitant for romance, lots of repressed stuff. gay but takes sooo long to realize it bc he thinks most women are conventionally pretty Aesthethically, feels obligated to Like Them, but has bad self esteem so never goes after them, then only likes (1) guy so hes like?? is this allowed?? is this allowed???? (HES LIKE. IN LOVE WITH SHIGARAKI)

Dabi: bi but rly hasn’t ever gotten to date anyone, so he’s actually more reserved about it and while he’ll tease, he absolutely is absent and kinda oblivious (again, I KNOWWWW bnha smash isnt canon, but. my god. when magne is hitting on him and he Just Doesnt Understand.) also hes ace

Tomura: doesn’t care. (just prob says ‘its whatever’) trans/nonbinary (i’M NOT PROJECTING, BUT. :’/) probably goes with like, the label queer if any but doesn’t care much for labels

Kurogiri: bi??? kind of??? I say kind of bc well, I hc U Know Whom as bi, I feel like thatd carry over but he’d be really avoidant to date anyone bc hes gotta Watch His Kid u know? this is gonna sound surprising but I think he’d be the type to be like ‘ok we can have a one night stand/fling BUT it cant get personal bc I have a Job to Do for my Son so don’t get up in your feelings’ and act a little coldly at first or very ..not personable... depending on who it was he’d prob turn around eventually, esp if that person valued his feelings/job :”)

Sako: that mans Not Straight. I hc him as gay and also trans :3c

Twice: Bi and HAS dated prob more than anyone else in the league imo, super comfortable with his sexuality and supportive of everyone else’s :)

ok that’s about all I can think of atm, come back in 5 minutes and my brain will refill with lov headcanons :3 thank you for asking!!