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12/18/2020 DAB Transcript

Habakkuk 1:1-3:19, Revelation 9:1-21, Psalms 137:1-9, Proverbs 30:10

Today is the 18th day of December welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I'm Brian and it's great to be here with you today as we continue the journey step-by-step day by day. Moment by moment together we move through the Scriptures. And it's not a secret that we’ve been moving rapidly through the Scriptures because we’re encountering shorter texts within the Scriptures. Today is no different. We got a brand-new book in front of us. And this one is called Habakkuk and we will read Habakkuk in its entirety today.

Introduction to the book of Habakkuk:

It's the eighth of the minor prophets. And who Habakkuk was is pretty well unknown. Maybe we know less about Habakkuk than we do any of the other writers in the Bible. Nahum, we didn't know much about him when we read that yesterday, but we did have some…some time…like we could locate him in time because of some specific references. Of course, me saying we’re not really exactly sure who Habakkuk was, that's like not new. People have been wondering, figuring, having traditions about a Habakkuk for centuries, even millennia. There’s a Jewish tradition that speaks of Habakkuk as is the son of a Shunamite woman who was resurrected through Elisha. And that stories found in the book of second Kings. Of course, Habakkuk’s not named in that story. So, it's a tradition. There’s other traditions, like fantastic traditions, one that’s found in the up apocryphal book “Bell and the Dragon” that talks about Habakkuk with Daniel while he was in the Lion’s den. But like I said, these are traditions, they may be long-running traditions, but they’re traditions and most scholars, especially with, like “Bell in the Dragon” find…find a story like that to be maybe be legendary. Nevertheless, many verses that are found in Habakkuk are famous. Maybe the most famous will be like Habakkuk 2:4 “but the righteous will live by their faithfulness to God.” That might sound familiar – “the righteous will live by faith” - is like a mainstay quote from the apostle Paul in his writings. It's also in…in the book of Hebrews. It's a core theme in the Christian faith. And scholars have noticed that…that the book itself, the text itself is sort of lyrical in form and definitely has a Psalm or hymn at the end, which leads some to think maybe Habakkuk was a temple musician, possibly. But basically, the book of Habakkuk is a conversation between the prophet Habakkuk and God, and it begins at a place of doubt. Habakkuk is saying out loud the things that he’s seeing, and they are leading him to doubt. He wants to know why God continues to allow evil to exist and to continue forward almost like he…he’s indifferent to it. And then God responds by saying the Babylonians are gonna come punish His own people, which leaves Habakkuk confused even more. Not sure, he’s perplexed. And then God reveals the Babylonians will punish His people and the Babylonians will be punished. Evil will be destroyed in the end. That's the goal. And, so, Habakkuk begins to realize that God’s not indifferent, he’s not unaware. He has His will. He will continue to move His plan forward. He is a God of justice. And Habakkuk ends up moving into a place of worship. And, so, Habakkuk has three chapters, and we will read them all now starting with chapter 1.

Prayer:

Father we thank You for Your word and another day to spend together in Your word. And we thank You for Habakkuk, a book that we read in its entirety today, one that shows us a movement from frustration and confusion to worship when we understand fully that You’re not aloof. You’re very, very much paying attention to what's going on and You are in control. We lose sight of that when we judge that it doesn't look like that, when we deem that it doesn't look like that anymore. And, so, we have these questions and these frustrations and then when we can settle into the fact that You are good, You are present, You are the most-high God, You are the all-powerful one and You are our Father. When that context takes hold again, when our actual reality reasserts itself than we, our spirits are again turned toward worship. What else can we do? There is none higher than You. There is nothing else to give our hearts to in worship. There is no other place to put our hope. And, so, our hope is in You and You alone. Come Holy Spirit, lead us forward in truth we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is the website, that is indeed home base and its where you find out what’s going on around here. And what else is going on…on besides Christmas time. We are getting very close are we not? We’re going to go through this weekend and then it’s gonna be Christmas week. How did it get here so quickly? Are we ready? Is everything done? All these things are swirling through our minds at Christmas and those things can kind of cover over what we’re really looking for underneath it all, which is hope for the arrival of the Savior.

So, I mentioned yesterday, we released a new single “O Holy Night” performed by Jill my wife and we’re just releasing it into all of the flurry of activity and festivity that goes on at this time, these moments, these days before Christmas comes. The words to that song are timeless and they root us back to that story underneath it all. Yes, this is joyous. Yes, there's a lot of chaos involved in Christmas, but underneath it all there is “oh holy night the stars are brightly shining it is the night of dear Saviors birth.” So, you can stream that on Spotify, or Apple music, or YouTube music or Google play, wherever, or you can buy it at any of these places as well and keep it a part of your permanent collection. Just look for Jill Parr. That's…well…that’s Jill’s maiden name, and that's what she was known of…known as before she was Jill Hardin. So, just look it up, “O Holy Night”, the single and enjoy. Listen to the words of that song and let it lead you deeper into the Christmas season.

The other thing we’ve been talking about is the Daily Audio Bible Shop. There are a number…there’s all kinds of stuff in the Daily Audio Bible Shop. Some stuff, yeah. If you’ve taken the 2020 journey, something to remember that journey. This has been an unforgettable year and we might want to forget it as quickly as possible, but we shouldn't because when we get some hindsight on this thing, we are going to see that we grew up all lot and it was time. We…we were…we were getting soft and pudgy, we were acting like a toddler, we were kicking and squirm…squirming, we were throwing our bottle down on the ground because things weren’t going our way. We were jumping up and down and throwing a fit. And once and a while things come along and they tell you, “you know what? A new season is upon you. Whether you like it or not it's time to grow up.” And we have in so many ways. So, just to kind of remember that, that is important because…so that we don't have to do these lessons again, not that pandemics are going to be sent upon the earth every year, but so that those pathways that lead us to transformation and growth and growing up so that we can have learned the lesson no matter what the catalyst was, so that we could've learned what we needed to learn and pick up what we need to pick up and lay down what we needed to lay down and move forward stronger. So, there's the case for remembering. But there are number of resources in the Daily Audio Bible Shop that just…there just that kind of a thing, they’re commemorative things each year as we go through the Scriptures. So, check that out. There are number of unique gifts there for…yeah…for anyone in your life. So, check that out. We have basically the weekend and then that’ll be sort of the end of it because we've reached our threshold for shipping inside the United States and etc. etc. So, check out the Daily Audio Bible Shop and maybe that hard-to-find gift will be there.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, you can do that at dailyaudiobible.com. There is a link on the homepage. I thank you with all of my heart, with all of my heart, with all of my gratitude for your partnership. Especially here as we’re ending the year. Thank you. Thank you for your partnership. If you’re using the Daily Audio Bible app you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or the mailing address, if that's your preference, is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And if you have a prayer request or encouragement you can hit the Hotline button in the app, which is the little red button up at the top or you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

This is Quiet Confidence from Virginia and ever since I got out of the mental hospital, I feel so lost. I’ve just been begging God to just please take me home because life seems so unbearable. It seems very unbearable. Every day is a struggle and I just need God to have mercy on my soul. I used to be so close to Him and I don’t know how I got to this place. But I need God to help me. The enemy keeps telling me I’m not a Christian, I’m not going to make it to heaven, but I ask God for forgiveness of my sins and that He would just please allow me to go home. My husband of 24 years has been trying to help me and I’ve been taking my medication, but I still struggle, and I really need God to deliver me. I don’t want to self-harm anymore, but I really need God to please just…just take me home. I just want it to be over because it’s a terrible feeling to feel lost every day. Lord Jesus please have mercy on my soul.

Hey this is holiday greeting from Justin in Colorado. I’ve walked with the Lord for several decades. I’ve been in the mission field. I’ve been on church staff. You know, all the things. But this year I purposed to work through the Bible in a…in a single year and I’ve just gotta say the Daily Audio Bible was such a huge gift. And consuming large volumes of Scripture every day has been transformational for me in the sense that I’ve got…I feel like I’ve gotten to know the Lord, His personality, just…just to know who He is, what He does, what He likes, what He doesn’t like. I…I feel a greater level of intimacy than I’ve ever felt even having quiet times and going a verse at a time every morning like I’ve done for years. So, this is been just a huge blessing to me. Thank you so much.

Hi yes this is Living by Grace. I don’t know if you can hear me clearly, but I just want to give a praise report. This is long overdue. Back about two years ago I called about my wife having some anxiety problems and since I called in maybe about a week and half afterwards really started see a marked change. And she was struggling even going to work and was really in a rough place. And I believe that God saw her through and helped use that situation to grow her closer to Him. And I just want to encourage anybody who is going through those things that I know is very real and I know that God has a plan for it and that He’s able to overcome whatever difficulty you’re going through. I’m a personal witness to it and I…I know that He has to continue to sustain her, sustain us in all that we do. But I just want to say thank you and thank the whole family, the Daily Audio Bible family for praying for us and just have a blessed day.

Hey, DABbers this is Katie in Kentucky. I just want to call and pray for all of you parents who are exhausted, whether you have a newborn who is not quite sleeping through the night like those two hour stretches that leave you just so tired or a parent of a four-year-old who wakes up in the middle of the night and won’t go back to sleep, those parents of teenagers who are out and trying to wait up for them or any of those parents who are just dealing with your children’s big feelings overall the Covid restrictions. I just want to pray for all of you. God lift up the parents, give them strength, give them energy that is just beyond anything that they can have on their own. Give them wisdom and the words to say to their kids as the kids are struggling. Give them peace. And God as much as possible, just give parents a good night’s sleep. In Jesus’ name. Amen. Love you DABbers. Bye.

Good morning Daily Audio Bible friends and family this is Granny Mary from Missouri. My best friend Vera has Covid and she’s in a coma on the ventilator in the hospital. She’s been in a coma for two weeks. They’re going to give her another week and try to decide. She’s got grandkids and a daughter. And would you please pray for her because, you know, it’s not easy for families who lose loved ones. She’s a wonderful Christian lady so, I know if God does take her home where she’s going, but the kids all need prayer, her grandkids and her daughter. So, thank you very much. God bless you all. Have a good day. Bye-bye.

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nadziejastar · 5 years

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It’s Canon: Lea and Isa are Officially Soul Mates (Analyzing Organization XIII’s Weapons)

No. VIII - Axel (Flurry of Dancing Flames)

An assassin who puts his own agenda first, and everything else on the back burner. Wields fire.

Axel’s Chakrams are Ashes, Doldrums, Delayed Action, Dive-Bombers, Combustion, Moulin Rouge, Blaze of Glory, Prometheus, Ifrit, Magma Ocean, Volcanics, Inferno, Sizzling Edge, Corona, Ferris Wheels, Burnout, Omega Trinity, Outbreak, Double Edge, Wildfire, Prominence, Eternal Flames, Pizza Cut (joke), and Conformers

Axel (along with Saix) has extremely fascinating weapons when we look at the symbolism. I always liked Lea and Isa together as a couple and I suspected that the writers of 358/2 Days did too. But when I actually took a very close look at the weapons and what they truly represent, I realized that the writers must have LOVED them together. No, seriously. It’s extraordinary how many references there are which share a common theme: the Sun and Moon, masculinity and femininity, the balance of opposites and yes, even romantic love.

The Sun represents our ‘outer-world’, our identify, our personality, our ego. It represents how we ‘shine our light’ out into the world, the present moment, and our yang or masculine archetype expression. The Sun offers us strength, courage and illuminated insight of the Soul.

The Moon represents our ‘inner world’, our hidden emotions, desires, our shadow-self, our fears, worries and our dreams. It represents our feelings, our unconscious beliefs, the past and our yin or feminine archetype. The Moon offers us the ability to feel, learn from the past and unlock and express our essence.

“I want everybody I meet to remember me. Inside people’s memories, I can live forever.”

Axel’s starting weapon is called Ashes. I think the name actually refers to two mythological stories. The first myth is that of the Phoenix from Greek mythology. Axel’s iconic weapon, his Zero Gear, is Eternal Flames. Associated with the Sun, a Phoenix obtains new life by arising from the ashes of its predecessor. Because it is continuously reborn from its own death, the Phoenix also took on the characteristics of regeneration and immortality.

The Phoenix is a very important symbol in alchemy. Interestingly, many of Saix’s weapons relate to alchemy as well. The process to create the Philosopher’s Stone was called magnum opus, or the “great work”. It has four stages: nigredo (black), albedo (white), citrinitas (yellow), and rubedo (red). Birds are are used to represent the progression through the colors. The final stage was symbolized by the Phoenix. Three of Axel’s weapons in 358/2 Days are based on these alchemical stages.

The Phoenix dies in a show of flames and Combustion. Its claim to fame is its ability to be reborn from the ashes of its former, who dies in a literal Blaze of Glory. This is one of only two weapons that Axel can upgrade to ++ status. In alchemy, nigredo, or blackness, means putrefaction or decomposition. Many alchemists believed that as a first step in the pathway to the Philosopher’s Stone, all alchemical ingredients had to be cleansed and cooked extensively to a uniform black matter. In psychology, the term became a metaphor for the “dark night of the soul”, when an individual confronts the shadow within.

Burnout represents albedo. It is a Latin term meaning “whiteness”. Following the chaos of the nigredo stage, the alchemist undergoes a purification in albedo, which involves the washing away of impurities. In this process, the subject is divided into two opposing principles to be later coagulated to form a unity of opposites during rubedo.

Outbreak is the weapon with the yellow rim. It represents citrinitas, a term given by alchemists to mean “yellowness.” It is a term used to refer to “transmutation of silver into gold” or “yellowing of the lunar consciousness.” In alchemical philosophy, citrinitas stood for the dawning of the “solar light” inherent in one’s being, and the idea that the reflective “lunar or soul light” was no longer necessary.

“Bet you don’t know why the sun sets red. You see, light is made up of lots of colors. And out of all those colors, red is the one that travels the farthest.”

Flame Liberator, Lea’s Keyblade actually represents the rubedo stage. It is a Latin word meaning “redness” that was adopted by alchemists to define the fourth and final major stage in their magnum opus. Both gold and the Philosopher’s Stone were associated with the color red, as rubedo signalled alchemical success, and the end of the great work.

The Phoenix represents the freeing of the spirit from the bounds of the physical. It builds its nest which at the same time is its funeral pyre, and then setting it alight cremates itself. But it arises anew from the ashes, transformed. The Phoenix now realizes the nature of the spiritual; he has in this sense attained the Philosopher’s Stone, the spiritual core of his being. The true self manifests in wholeness, a point in which a person discovers their true nature. The Sun is analogous to the soul transmuted and illuminated, representing the perfect union of spirit, soul and body; the Omega Trinity. This is the center point of equilibrium sought by the alchemists.

The second myth has to do with Axel’s title, Flurry of Dancing Flames.The Hindu god Shiva has many representations in art, but perhaps the most famous is as a dancing figure within a circle of flames known as Shiva Nataraja, or Lord of the Dance. His dance is called Tandava, and its symbol is Agni, or fire. Tandava, the masculine form of dance, is forceful, often manifesting anger. According to Hindu legend, Shiva almost signalled the end of this universe by performing this dangerous dance after the death of Sati.

Sati spurned the advances of rich kings to the point where she left for a forest to escape the constant proposals. Eventually Shiva consented to make her his bride. Elated, she went to share the news with her father. However, upon her father’s expression of his disapproval of her marriage, she immolated herself, praying to one day be reborn as a daughter to a father she could respect. When Sati self-immolated, Shiva couldn’t control his anger, pain and agony.

Unable to bear the loss of his wife, he covered his entire body with her ashes as a sign that she will be with him forever. He then went into meditation for many years, ignoring all his godly duties. It was not until Sati was reborn as the goddess Parvati that Shiva finally came out of meditation. Thus the Tandava symbolizes the cosmic cycles of creation and destruction, as well as birth and death.

This very is interesting because Saix also has Shiva imagery in his weapons. And one weapon’s etymology ALSO references an act of self-sacrifice…in a fire, no less. Hmm. Sounds like there was some kind of self-sacrifice story planned originally. Maybe Isa offered himself up to be experimented on to protect Lea?

Shiva and Parvati then merge together and exist as the same being called Ardhanarishvara. It is depicted as half-male and half-female, equally split down the middle. The right half is usually the male Shiva, illustrating his traditional attributes. Ardhanarishvara represents the synthesis of the masculine and feminine energies of the universe and illustrates how the female principle of the Goddess Parvati, is inseparable from Shiva, the male principle of God.

“A powerful djinn with control over scorching flames hot enough to turn the whole world to ashes.” —Dissidia Final Fantasy Summon Compendium

Ifrit is a very popular summon in the Final Fantasy series, associated with the element of Fire. Inferno is one of his strongest abilities. They are also supernatural creatures in Islamic culture. The Ifrit are a class of subterranean djinn and held to be death-spirits, drawn to the life-force or blood of a murdered victim, seeking revenge on the murderer.

“As long as we remember each other, we’ll never be apart. Got it memorized?”

Ifrit shares its shape with another weapon, Omega Trinity. Omega is the name of the Greek letter representing infinity, so the natural meaning would have to do with his vow to never be apart from his two friends. I do think that’s one of the meanings. However, hidden in the weapon’s shape is another meaning.

According to alchemy, the Tria Prima are the three substances of salt, sulfur, and mercury that make up all things. These chemical substances are said to have similar properties to the three celestial elements that flow out from the mind of God into creation. These forces correspond to divine trinities found in many religions, like Christianity.

When salt, sulfur, and mercury are combined, it creates what is called an alchemical marriage, the symbol of which is the Ouroboros. The Ouroboros is the snake eating its own tail in the shape of a circle, representing unity, eternity, and how the beginning and the end coincide. It is associated with the the idea that all-is-one; light and darkness, Sun and Moon, masculinity and femininity, etc. He is the bride and the groom, the beginning and the end, the Alpha and the Omega. If Ifrit represents death, then Omega Trinity represents rebirth.

“Living explosives, prone to destroying themselves along with their enemies with their powerful “Self-Destruct.” Bombs take the rage built up by being attacked and transform it into energy. This, in turn, makes them grow, sometimes to incredible sizes.” —Dissidia Final Fantasy Files

Many of his weapons refer to bombs or explosives. Bombs are also enemies in Final Fantasy. A Delayed Action bomb is an aerial bomb designed to explode some time after impact, with the bomb’s fuzes set to delay the explosion for times ranging from very brief to several weeks.

“Go on, you just keep running. But I'll always be there to bring you back!”

A Dive-Bomber is a bomber aircraft that dives directly at its targets in order to provide greater accuracy for the bomb it drops. Diving towards the target simplifies the bomb’s trajectory and allows the pilot to keep visual contact throughout the bomb run. This weapon is one of the two that can be upgraded to ++ status, implying that it’s particularly important to his character.

I also couldn’t help but notice that many of Axel’s weapons were shaped like the symbols commonly used for the chakras. Even Lea’s frisbee shares this shape. Just as there are 7 colors, and 7 Guardians of Light, there are 7 chakras designated to each of the colors. Axel’s weapons are based on the red chakra, the Root chakra. This is the chakra of security. It is comprised of whatever grounds you to stability in your life. It is the most important and fundamental chakra. The Root Chakra provides the link between our energetic system and the physical world and is the base for our life force energy. When these energies are blocked, our vitality and zest for life are also compromised.

Delayed Action in particular seems to incorporate the smaller petal design of the second chakra into it as well, the Sacral chakra. Associated with the water element, it’s characterized by movement and flow in our emotions and thoughts. Its symbol is the Crescent Moon. It’s the center of our feelings and sensations. It’s particularly active in our sexuality and the expression of our sensual and sexual desires.

Doldrums are areas around the earth centered slightly north of the equator between the two belts of trade winds. The large amount of solar radiation that arrives at the earth in this area causes intense heating of the land and ocean. This heating causes various forms of severe weather, such as thunderstorms and squalls. Hurricanes originate in this region. The doldrums are also noted for calms, periods when the winds disappear, trapping sailing vessels for days or weeks. Without doubt, the doldrums are probably one of the hottest places on Earth. In the doldrums, the Sun becomes a laser beam and sailors are exposed to raw, piercing heat from sunrise to sunset.

Moulin Rouge is French for “Red Mill”. It is a cabaret in Paris, France. Its iconic red windmill originally had a Sun in the center and a Crescent Moon at the top. The original house burned down in 1915 and the new house no longer has the Sun and Moon design on the windmill.

Ferris Wheels is probably a reference to the Disneyland attraction that opened as the Sun Wheel.

Both Moulin Rouge and Ferris Wheels use the achemical symbol ☼ for gold. Gold was associated with Sun and was one of the most prominent alchemical symbols, representing spiritual, physical and mental perfection for human beings.

The tips of the rays, however, have the same shape as one of the symbols for silver. ☽ is also one of the alchemical symbols for silver. It was one of the seven base metals to an alchemist and often associated with the Moon. Silver was believed to have feminine qualities and associated with purity. ☽☉ is the symbol for platinum. Alchemists thought that platinum was the mixture of gold and silver and that is why the symbol was created to look that way.

Ferris Wheels looks like it is made of platinum. Moulin Rouge is the black and red weapon. Sol niger is a term in alchemy meaning black sun. It can refer to the first stage of the alchemical magnum opus, the nigredo. The black sun is used to illuminate the dissolution of the body, a blackening of matter, or putrefaction.

Lea: You know what? I’ll bring ‘em back myself.

Ienzo: Huh? How, exactly?

Lea: Why do I always get stuck with the icky jobs?

There are several other weapons that are either silver or platinum, and all are shaped like the Root chakra of security and stability. Ashes, the symbol of death is one. As well as being a Solar phenomena, Doldrums also refers to a dull, listless, or depressed mood. Dive-Bomber is the aircraft that dives directly at its target for greater accuracy. It is platinum with red tips. Inferno and Combustion are just red and black. They might be a symbol of Ifrit’s desire to avenge the murder victim and the Phoenix’s death at the pyre. Inferno is a also a perfect circle, symbolizing the cycle of death and rebirth.

And all the weapons have the “X” symbol incorporated into them. This is probably a reference to Saix and Axel’s relationship throughout the game. The only exception is Delayed Action. The bomb that doesn’t detonate right away. It it has black petals with red dots in them. A sign of rubedo within nigredo? It’s also shaped like the sensual Sacral chakra. Oh, I get it. That kind of delayed action.

Magma Ocean is shaped like a red and black yin-yang. You can even see the dots as a reference for the design. Yin and yang are two sides of a dualism. Yin is passive, feminine, and subdued. Yang, in contrast, is active, masculine, and expressive. You can use any color to represent yin or yang, so long as you can bring out the contrast. In Chinese culture, Red is a very positive color representing good fortune and joy. Black represents stability, calmness, the unknown and that which is dormant.

The actual term magma ocean refers to a theory of planetary formation. In the last giant impact, the Earth was struck by an object the size of Mars. This impact is believed to have formed the Moon. The Moon-forming impact was most likely the origin of the last major, deep and global magma ocean on Earth. Magma oceans may survive for millions to tens of millions of years.

Corona and Prominence refer to two specific Solar phenomena. Solar prominence refers to the glowing, red loops of plasma that extend outward from the photosphere, the lowest layer of the sun’s atmosphere. The corona is the outermost part of the Sun’s atmosphere. The corona is usually hidden by the bright light of the Sun’s surface. It is only during a total solar eclipse that the Sun’s corona and prominence are visible to the naked eye. In other words, it is only when the Sun and Moon are directly aligned that you can see these features of the Sun;s light. Prominence is Axel’s Zero Gear, a weapon said to draw forth its wielder’s true worth.

I also noticed that some of his weapons are purple, a color not usually associated with Axel. Wildfire and Double Edge are the purple ones. Wildfire also incorporates the color silver into its design, symbolizing a union with the Moon. Double-edged means something having two contradictory aspects or outcomes. Wildfire is actually called Rapid Spinner in Japanese, a reference to the chakras.

The Sanskrit word chakra literally translates to wheel or disk. In yoga, this term refers to the swirling wheels of energy throughout the body. The Third Eye corresponds to the colors violet, indigo or deep blue. It is considered the eye of intuition and intellect. This chakra has two lotus petals dedicated to the Sun, the other to the Moon (e.g. light and dark, or male and female) merged at the center.

The sixth chakra occurs exactly where the bindi is placed. A bindi is a decorative mark worn in the middle of the forehead by Indian women. In Hindu metaphysics, Bindu is considered the dot or point at which creation begins and may become unity. The bindi’s purpose is to enhance the powers of this chakra, specifically by facilitating one’s ability to access their inner wisdom, allowing them to see the world and interpret things in a truthful, unbiased manner. It is at the point of the Third Eye that the two main energy streams in the body are said to terminate and merge with the central channel, signifying the end of duality. The symbol for this chakra is the syllable OM, and the presiding deity is Ardhanarishvara, who is the half male, half female Shiva.

The bindi, especially a red-colored one, also serves as an auspicious sign of marriage. As the Hindu bride steps over the threshold of her husband’s home, her red bindi is believed to usher in prosperity and grant her a place as the family’s newest guardian. In Hinduism, the color red represents honor, love, and prosperity; hence it was worn to symbolize these qualities. One of the red weapons is named Corona, which also means crown of the head. In Japanese this weapon is called Crowning. A topor is a type of conical headgear traditionally worn by grooms as part of a Hindu wedding ceremony. According to a legend, the Topor was created because lord Shiva wanted a special crown for his wedding ceremony.

Prometheus, in Greek mythology, is one of the Titans, the supreme trickster, and a god of fire. His intellectual side was emphasized and he was considered a forward thinker. Prometheus lit a torch from the Sun and brought it back to man. However, Zeus was enraged that man again had fire. He decided to inflict a terrible punishment on both man and Prometheus. Saix’s weapons are all about astrology (and alchemy). Axel is the only other character whose weapon references a god associated with a specific Zodiac sign. So I think it’s fair to make the connection.

Prometheus represents Aquarius. Aquarius people are the visionaries of the zodiac. Aquarius rules emotional detachment, unpredictable energy and rebellion. Those of the Aquarius zodiac sign are humanitarian, philanthropic, and keenly interested in making the world a better place. They are also quick to engage others in this process, which is why they have so many friends and acquaintances. Aquarius is the most humanitarian astrological sign.

Aquarians are one of the most friendly and entertaining signs of the zodiac, and thus they can be fun to spend time with. Their eccentric and empathetic nature leads them to be great advice givers, always happy and excited to help those in need as well as to have a listening ear. They make great friends, and work hard so that more introverted signs can come out of their shells. Their curiosity with the world means that they are always willing to accompany friends into new adventures. They are also generous givers, so if you are ever in need, an Aquarian will not hesitate to share whatever they have with you.

Aquarius can be eccentric and energetic. They are deep thinkers and highly intellectual people. They are able to see without prejudice, on both sides, which makes them people who can easily solve problems. If there is no mental stimulation, they are bored and lack motivation to achieve the best result. Although they can easily adapt to the energy that surrounds them, Aquarius-born have a deep need to be alone and away from everything sometimes, in order to restore their energy.

Despite their friendly nature, they have a reputation for being outsiders - ones that cooly observe society, while sometimes also feeling detached from the systems that run it. Although they can be quite aloof, they are also deeply concerned with humanitarian causes. Aquarians tend to care very much for the welfare of others and society as a whole.

Loyalty and honesty are two of the most important traits an Aquarius will look for when choosing who they like to spend time with. Aquarius will do anything for a loved one to the point of self-sacrifice if necessary. Freedom is important to Aquarians, which is why they like to keep things light on an interpersonal level. Amiable and cheery by disposition, Aquarius-born tend to have a plenty of social charm.

Although Aquarius-born are communicative, they need time to get close to people. Considering that they are highly sensitive people, closeness to them means vulnerability. They may have a lot of acquaintances, but many have very few close friends. Aquarians easily make friends with any other sign of the zodiac, but their friendship is particularly appreciated by the more quiet signs - as their extroversion can balance the other’s introversion, and bring the quieter person into larger groups.

Axel’s weapon Prometheus is actually shaped like the symbol for Mars ♂. It represents his weapon, the lance, which the astrological symbol is based on. Mars is also known as the “Red Planet”. The counterpart of Mars among the Greek gods is Ares, of the zodiac sign Aries.

Thanks to its ruling planet Mars and the fact it belongs to the element of Fire, Aries is one of the most active zodiac signs. It is in their nature to take action, sometimes before they think it through. Its representatives are naturally brave and rarely afraid of trial or risk. They possess youthful strength and energy, regardless of their age and quickly perform any given tasks. Aries never does anything half-heartedly, so if you are spending time with someone under the Aries zodiac sign then you will feel the full force of their zest for life.

An Aries is ready to be the hero of the day, fly away and carry many endangered, powerless people on their back. Those under Aries often have a very positive attitude and are less inclined to feel pity for themselves than some other signs. At times they can be quite hot headed, given their propensity to seek out justice. If harnessed properly, the fire that burns inside them is something that will fuel their actions, and will push them to become defenders of both themselves and others.

You know what’s really interesting? Saix has a weapon that matches Axel’s Prometheus. It’s called Horoscope. It’s shaped like the astrological symbol ♀ for Venus, and it has the Mars symbol going straight through it. This weapon is one of only two that Saix can be upgrade to ++ status, so it is implied to be very important to his character. It’s pretty and pink and it even has a shape reminiscent of a spiky seashell. One of Venus’ iconic symbols is the seashell. And the middle part is gold, for the net of Vulcan.

There is a well-known myth concerning the forbidden love affair between Venus and Mars. Venus was the goddess of love and beauty, and was considered the fairest of all the goddesses. Venus was married to Vulcan, the god of fire and the forge. Vulcan was notoriously ugly – one of the ugliest of the gods.

At one point, Venus took up an affair with Vulcan’s brother, Mars. Handsome, young, and clean-built, he is irresistible to her, and they make passionate love in Vulcan's marriage bed. When he learned of the relationship, Vulcan was outraged and he crafted an unbreakable golden net to trap the adulterers. According to the legends, whenever Venus had an affair, Vulcan would get so angry he would erupt a volcano. This is supposedly the reason there are so many volcanoes. Hmm, if this was supposed to be a horoscope...

...It’s funny, because Axel has a weapon that is actually named Volcanics. It shares a shape with Prominence, his Pandora’s Gear and his Mystery Gear, Conformer. They are shaped like a symbol used in Buddhism and Hinduism known as a Manji (Japanese for whirlwind). Conformer is called Fuma Shuriken in the Japanese version. “Fuma” translates to “wind demon” in English. So it is literally the wind demon shuriken.

The Manji is a symbol representing the harmonious interplay of opposites. The horizontal line unites light and darkness, while the perpendicular line symbolically connects heaven and earth. These two combine to form a cross representing the universe in harmony beyond the limits of time and space. In Hinduism, the symbol with arms pointing clockwise (Ura), symbolizes the Sun, prosperity and good luck, while the counterclockwise symbol (Omote) symbolizes night. All of Axel’s weapons are Ura, of course.

Also, if you look in the middle of them both, you see that Volcanics has a ⊕ , the Sun Cross symbol. And the Fuma Shuriken has a Recusant’s Sigil in the middle. The “X” of death. Mystery Gear is supposed to bring out one’s true personality, so what does that say about him?

…Phew, I guess that covers it. This meta took me like a month to make. There is no way that the writers put that much symbolism in if Saix and Axel were not viewed, at least internally by the staff, as a romantic couple. This officially proved it to me. Beyond a shadow of a doubt.

#kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts meta #kingdom hearts 358/2 days #kingdom hearts 3 #kh axel #kh lea #leaisa #akusai #anti-kh3 #i fucking love leaisa #its so pure and beautiful otp #kh saix #organization xiii

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minaminokyoko · 5 years

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Avengers Endgame: A (Late, Incredibly Long) Spoilertastic Review

Well, it’s done.

I did it. We did it. We all watched the original lineup of Avengers’ stories come to its end.

So what did I think?

It was phenomenal. A worthy ending to a more than worthy series of films and stories.

There are just so many things to go over and so many points to hit that I have to warn you this review is likely going to be just as long as Endgame’s running time, so strap in.

Overall Grade: A-

Naturally, spoilers below.

I’m taking a note from a friend of mine and have decided that due to the film’s epic length and its history, the best way to tackle my reactions is first per character, and then I can evaluate things like plot and story and action. Just a heads’ up. So here we go.

Tony

Christ. I…wow, where do I even start?

There’s just so much to talk about with this movie and the arc that Tony Stark has been fulfilling since his first film. I almost don’t know how I can even put into words what I feel for this character. Tony came to us as this swaggering, arrogant diva, and yet the first Iron Man breaks him down to his core character. Tony Stark is a man with everything and nothing. He has the looks, the intelligence, and the resources to have everything a person could want, and yet he has no family and no deep connections with others aside from Rhodey and Pepper when it all starts. The core of the MCU was very cleverly built around the theme of Tony’s heart, and that’s perhaps why so many of us are devastated to know his fate. We all saw it coming. There was sadly no other way Tony’s story would pan out if we wanted to stick to his full arc. Tony could not rest until he knew the universe would be safe, and he made sure it would be before he left us. His legacy is incredible. It’s so…hell, to use a bad pun, heartwarming.

I guess the best thing to do in order for me to not just recap every amazing thing he’s done since Iron Man is to recap moments in Endgame for Tony that leapt out at me as exceptional:

-The intro with Tony playing paper football with Nebula. Stab me in the heart. That was so cute. It’s so very like Tony to try and keep her strong and keep her spirits up when they were literally staring death in the face. It was unexpectedly adorable, and even without us having seen the days they spent together, you could tell that Tony treated her in a mature-ish fashion and that’s why Nebula appeared to be affectionate, or at the very least, respectful towards him when she is usually very distant. You could tell they totally depended on each other and it was an important partnership. I was very, very touched when she scooped him up and put him in the seat when they were approaching their final day together. It’s such a powerful thing to see how far Tony has come, through the lens of Nebula showing such compassion for him even in such a short amount of time. I love how the Russos are so good at conveying thoughts and emotions and story without saying it outright. It’s an amazing skill in filmmaking.

-Tony’s arrival back to earth, and his confrontation with the Avengers. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. My fucking feelings, y’all. Christ. I mean, the Russos already know how to gut-punch you and then kick you when you’re down, but Tony’s complete and utter break down still hurts like a mother. It’s just so raw and emotional, and it should be that way after a loss on this kind of scale. What really tipped me over into choking down frustrated tears was that Tony just looks at Cap desperately when he stumbles off that ship and says in this broken voice, “I lost the kid.” He can’t even bear to say Peter Parker’s name. The shame and loss and guilt is too much for him to say his little Spider Son’s name. Oh, fuck you, Russo brothers.

And then the team being in utter shambles over losing to Thanos, all of them just barely holding it together, and then Tony just shatters. He’s home and he’s with family, but he can’t get over this kind of failure. What really tears it is him going after Steve so viciously, and it’s so complex. He’s angry at himself, and he chooses to direct that anger at Cap because we all know Tony took it as a personal loss, as all of them did, that he couldn’t stop Thanos even though he literally gave it everything. He gave every last bit, every last drop, of effort, and he couldn’t stop Thanos. It just hurts. And the resentment that was already between Cap and Tony after Civil War is still clearly there, so the entire scene is just like being dragged naked over broken glass. RDJ and Evans’ acting here is some of the best of the entire series in this scene. It sets the stage and reminds us of the stakes amazingly well.

-Tony’s post Snap life, and his interactions with his family. All of us Tony stans called it that Tony would be a phenomenal father. He’s already shown us that he can be the right amount of strict and caring, and everything with Morgan is exactly what I dreamt it would be. I could rewatch the scenes with Tony and Morgan a thousand times. People can shit on Tony all they want and I will never listen to them, because it’s so apparent how much and how deeply he cares in scenes like this. Where he confronts Pepper after he figures out the time heist equation. Years ago, Tony may have lied to her or made a decision without consulting her, but Tony has grown as a person and he approaches his wife with one of the most important things he will ever do in his life and he asks for her opinion before he does anything. It’s such a good comparison to how he used to be. Tony’s heart is so huge in this whole sequence. It’s such a good representation of his internal battle between doing what is right for everyone and doing what is right for him.

-Tony and Cap’s reconciliation. Oh, my heart. I love how Tony approaches it in such a Tony sort of way, forgiving Cap and agreeing to move past their resentment for what happened in Civil War. I like that it was done in a brisk sort of way, and that a lot of the power in the scene comes from RDJ and Evans’ facial expressions. Really, these two act off of each other so well that part of why we’re all crying so hard about this movie is the horrible knowledge that we don’t get to see them act opposite each other in this context. I pray they stay friends in real life, and I would love to see them reunited on screen someday. It’s such a great relationship and it’s at the core of why this is such a great film series.

-The New York heist. Oh God. I can’t wait for them to tell us if the comment about Cap’s ass was in the script or if it was an improvised line by RDJ or Paul Rudd. It is by far one of the funniest things ever to happen in the MCU. Dear God, I was howling. The best part is that during the premiere we were all laughing so hard that I missed Cap’s initial reply, which was, “No one’s asking you to look, Tony.” Christ, I can’t deal. I know it’s straight up Stony pandering but I don’t give a fuck, it was hilarious. And it’s a very meta joke since Chris Evans’ gorgeous, flawless body is a meme thanks to his Dorito proportions (if you haven’t seen that yet, oh god, please look it up) and the fact that he has an absolutely phenomenal ass, especially for a white guy from Boston. Anyway, Tony and Scott’s whole interaction was perfect, and I loved how the scene went and how it led into the next one.

-The army base heist. Tony running into his father was such a good twist. I absolutely did not see that coming, but it was a really welcome conversation to give Tony closure. He’s felt so guilty for how he left things with them, and it was so touching to see him get a second chance at it, even if Howard was none the wiser. I really hadn’t expected anything like that, but it worked well with Tony’s arc and I thought it was very sweet.

-Tony’s reaction to seeing his baby boy, his little Spider Son, running up to him. My God. This was everything. I am a hardcore supporter of the Iron Dad and Spider Son dynamic, and this was the reunion I so sorely needed after the sick, demented, painful scene that was the final moments in Infinity War. Like the rest of you, the level of trauma that hit me when Peter Parker died is just…hell, infinite. The pain was just infinite. I both love and hate Tom Holland and RDJ for doing that shit to us. I did not know I could cry that hard about a fictional character, but I openly wept to the point of sobbing when Peter Parker died in IW, and to see him back in this scene was so wonderful. In my second viewing, the audience actually clapped when Peter swung through the portal, and that was quite sweet for me to experience. But back to the point: once again, I have to simply compliment RDJ’s acting. This is why we love him so much. It’s not even about the big, loud moments. His acting is so precise that the flurry of emotional expressions that Tony went through when his tiny son helped him up and started excitedly babbling to him about being dead, of all things, and then Tony just doesn’t even interrupt him, he just walks forward and pulls that little boy into his arms and holds him tightly in a hug and it’s just…wow. This is some spectacular acting on both their parts, and it heals a really wounded part of my heart, even though the next scene I talk about just breaks it all over again. Plus, at the time I wrote this review, the Spider-Man: Far From Home full trailer just dropped and (SPOILER ALERT) the opening scene is Peter Parker and Happy mourning Tony and I just feel like someone hammered a stake into my chest. This scene is so fantastic. It’s just another reminder of how damn much Tony Stark cares about the people around him and that he has an actual family now, and that’s why the next scene is possibly the saddest one of all.

-Tony’s death. Like Loki’s untimely demise, I knew this was coming from years and years of being a writer. Based on the track for his character arc and because RDJ announced this is his final official performance as the character, I knew Tony was going to die. There was no way around it. His determination to save everyone and correct the wrong done to the universe by Thanos would drive him past his limits and cause him to sacrifice it all. It’s just…man. I wish it had ended differently for him. Anyone who follows me on Tumblr knows that I tag all Iron Man posts with “we stan Tony Stark in this house” and that is how I feel. While Tony is not my favorite Avenger, I will stand up for him all day, err day. Tony Stark is the epitome of the human spirit, and in a different way than Cap, if you ask me. Tony is all of the dark and seedy parts, but also the defiance and the self-deprecation and the obsession and the power of the human spirit. He has so many vices and yet so many virtues. He cares to a fault. He blames himself to a fault. He has come so far after that brutal conversation in Avengers when Cap accuses him of not being the man to lay down on the razor wire and let the other guy crawl over you. He made the ultimate sacrifice play. As much as I reject the idea, we all knew it had to be him. It had to be. Because at the end of the day, Tony’s need to make his family safe was more precious to him than his own life. He gave up a future with his loved ones to make sure Thanos could never hurt them again. And all of it was capped off with a line that will probably haunt me forever, of Pepper’s soft, forgiving goodbye, “You can rest.”

-Tony’s farewell message to his family. Want to know something crazy? I cried so hard at the premiere. So hard. I was almost dry heaving with how hard I cried at Tony’s funeral. But then I had a week of time and I saw it again this past Sunday. I was choked up during his death but I didn’t shed actual tears this time until “I love you 3000.” Somehow, it didn’t hit me until the second time how they filmed Tony’s goodbye to us. They shot it in such a way that as he leans down to turn off the recording, he’s actually looking at us. Not directly into the camera, but so close to it that it finally hit me that this was RDJ’s goodbye and thank you to the fans. It was so touching and sincere that I finally broke down and actually cried again. What truly hurts is knowing that his loved ones have to be without him, and even though his sacrifice means everything, he is going to leave behind such a void. Even with his problems and his flaws, Tony was a damn good man and he was the right choice to begin this epic series. I can’t express how much I am going to miss him and how much I am going to miss RDJ in this shared universe. He’s so charismatic and wonderful and complex. It was not only a comeback for Tony Stark, but a comeback for a very troubled man, and it’s come full circle that Tony had a loving family just as RDJ has a loving family after his checkered past. To be honest, I’m likely going to do as I did for Loki and have a cutoff point in my brain for the MCU, where I don’t accept what happened because it’s too painful. I just pretend that nothing happened after that hug with Peter Parker and they all won the day and no one died. That’s just how it’s gotta be for me to survive a post Endgame world.

Thank you, Tony. You gave everything. I love you now and always.

Thor

-Thor executing Thanos. Standing. Fucking. Ovation. Right, so, I know that Thor probably should not have outright killed Thanos before they had more information, but at the same time, there was nothing more to get out of that son of a bitch and I clapped when Thor swung Stormbreaker and lopped that mo’fo’s head clean off, and I flipped off Thanos’ corpse with both fingers. Good boy. He told you he’d kill you, and he killed you, you sorry bastard. A+++

-Thor’s depression and weight gain. Alright. *rolls up sleeves* Time to make some enemies. I think Fat!Thor is a great idea, but the execution could have been done better. I recognize writing tricks when I see them, and Fat!Thor seems to be two ideas in one, and one of them is what is bothering the semi-reasonable part of the fandom. What I’ll do is explain my take on both parts of the overall idea.

(1) Thor’s depression at his failure (at the time) to reverse the Snap and save everyone is 100% accurate, in character, and is damn good writing. Thor has never actually full-on failed at anything in his life. The closest he has come is between being cast out in the first Thor movie for being irrational and cruel, and in Ragnarok where he had to let Surtur destroy Asgard in order to save his people. Even then, Thor lost battles, not the overall war. Therefore, Thor does not understand how to process failure. Yes, he also failed to save his mother, but at the same time, it’s not a failure on this level. He lost Frigga, Loki, the Warriors Three, and Heimdall, but this was literally trillions of lives that he feels were weighed on his shoulders, and his shoulders alone, even though as Rocket pointed out, losing the war was the fault of a LOT of people, not just Thor (and not Starlord either, you bunch of whiny hypocrites in the fandom, ugh). So becoming an alcoholic and giving up on his life as a hero is definitely how Thor would handle things. Think about it. He no longer has any guidance from his family, or his best friend, since they died. All he has is his Avengers family and Valkyrie. I’m sure the Avengers tried to talk him out of it to no avail, and that’s a really sad thing to know, that they couldn’t get him out of his depression spiral, so they let him wallow in it. As for Valkyrie, she’s still just barely recovered from her own trauma, and I am sure she probably tried to snap him out of it too, but he was too stubborn to listen. What I like about this point for his character is that Thor is right—he has always been expected to be “worthy” and to be the savior. Thor is the big gun on the team alongside the Hulk. He has always been the bravest, the noblest, and the most powerful person on the team, and he is expected as a king to win the day every time. But he lost. And he can’t reconcile it since he has always triumphed in the end. So it’s very understandable for him to lose control and just want to have nothing to do with the hero business, because if you fail once, you can fail again, and he couldn’t bear the thought of failing again, not after it cost him literally everything.

(2) Fat!Thor was an easy source of cheap laughs to keep the mood from getting too dark considering the subject matter handled in this movie. I am of two minds about this issue. On the one hand, I can see why certain people feel that this is fat shaming. It is. But the problem stems from the fact that the fat shaming is still a large part of American culture, and people have not broken the bad habit yet, and so it gets shifted into the easy laughs category. The easy laughs are for the Average Joe viewer. It’s for people who aren’t as conscious of how it sounds to mock him for his weight gain who are just used to “ha ha, fat person jokes.” Some fans felt uncomfortable that he was the butt of a few jokes because a lot of us who suffer from depression know that this is in fact a side effect. When you’re depressed, it’s easy to stress eat and overeat, and you lean heavily towards comfort foods that cause you to gain weight, and your depression makes you tired, so you also don’t exercise and that’s how you can end up overweight. On the other hand, while I agree with these folks about not liking the fat jokes, I also think it was necessary to show a character we all admire falling into the same pitfalls that we as mere Midgardians deal with on a daily basis. I don’t like the jokes, but I do like Fat!Thor’s inclusion in this story because people need to realize what depression does to a person. It shouldn’t have been handled this way, but from a strictly observer perspective, I understand why they went for the low hanging fruit. People needed to laugh since Endgame has very, very dark elements to it. I would have preferred they approach his weight gain in a more dignified fashion, but not every part of this movie was written for me and I sadly have to accept it. That’s my feelings on it.

-Thor’s encounter with Frigga on Asgard. I. FREAKING. LOVE. THIS. I did not see it coming, and I love it with every fiber of my being. This is such a heartwarming scene. I want to rewatch it a thousand times. I love Frigga immediately knowing what’s up (she’s not stupid and of course she noticed and it’s everything to me) and I love that she can clearly see how distraught her beautiful son has become. I love Thor having a panic attack, because that’s extremely realistic after he’s gone so long not having done any hero work, per se, and having to face his previous failed relationship with Jane, and with facing the day his mother died again. It’s really compelling writing. Frigga’s gentle reassurance is exactly what he needed, and it’s exactly what we needed to see him go through. He had to let go of the expectations piled upon him and accept himself for who he is, not who he needs to be as a warrior king and an Avenger. While I do wish they had gone on to show us a little more of who he considers himself to be instead of who he is supposed to be, I am really excited to hear Chris Hemsworth is one of the Avengers who has chosen to stay past the end of Phase Three. He’s young and funny and vibrant and I think Thor is his best role of his career anyhow (no offense meant, Hems, if you ever read this, you handsome golden retriever, you). I think exploring Thor’s personal goals and future will be very interesting.

-Thor’s reaction to Natasha’s death. This is a very small moment, but I actually like it a lot. I like that Thor’s optimism here is a form of denial. I like it because there are certain Avengers who despite the 11 year saga have not interacted with each other much, and Thor and Nat are probably my leading example. When it hit him that they couldn’t use the time stone to bring her back, the loss and devastation on his face almost made up for the fact that Thor and Nat have almost no lines with each other in the film series. I like it because it hurts and because it shows that she does matter to him, even though they don’t interact. It’s a nice detail to include since I was often a little sad I never got to see these two have dialogues. I personally have even written a bit of fanfiction about what their relationship could have been like, and I think it could have been sort of brother-sisterly. It’s a shame we won’t get to see it, but I like that it is given attention here at last.

-Thor wanting to undo the Snap. Yes. This is a very good character beat for him. Again, I agree it’s annoying he ends up getting another fat joke thrown at him (nice work, Rhodey, sheesh, it’s not like the poor guy was traumatized or anything), I like that Tony talks him down. I like that Tony doesn’t think he can’t do it, he’s worried that Thor is in so much pain that he shouldn’t try to make such a rash decision that could cost him his life. Tony seemed dismissive, but I think he was trying to protect his friend more than anything else. I think Tony also knew that it would be rough if Thor either died or became permanently crippled by undoing the Snap. Being able to fight is extremely important to Thor, even with his depression, because Thor is essentially a space Viking. It shows that Tony is aware that Thor’s not just bumbling around as a chubby drunk, but he’s legitimately in pain and he needs to take things slower.

-Thor giving Valkyrie the throne. First off, I need to sling salt at the freaking part of the Thorkyrie fandom that is somehow complaining about this scene. Are you kidding me? What movie did you watch? This is the ultimate freaking Thorkyrie scene, you bunch of whiny nincompoops! Thor literally gave Valkyrie the throne because she is so smart, powerful, and kind that he trusted her to take care of the people he loves with all his heart. The amount of trust and respect that is in this scene makes me want to just squeal for hours. I can’t handle how affectionate and reverent Thor is as he gives Valkyrie the throne. I love the long gaze they share. I love the handshake. I love that Val asks when she’ll see him again. I love that Thor has faith in her and how she will lead his people. Anyone bitching that this is an anti-Thorkyrie scene did not see the same movie we did, and you can all piss off. I love this scene to my core. I love seeing Valkyrie being assured to be a relevant part of Thor’s story and that it likely means Tessa Thompson is going to join us again for either Thor 4 or Guardians of the Galaxy 3. I am a giant freaking fan of her character and I can’t scream “SIGN ME THE FUCK UP” loud enough for her to be in future films with him, and with the MCU in general. I hope she signed a three movie deal or more. That would be amazing. But anyway, my point is, this scene is fantastic and I will be rewinding it a lot when this movie gets to DVD. Nothing makes me happier than Thor shooting heart-eyes at Val, and he was shooting them so hard in this scene that he even took his sunglasses off. God bless this scene.

-Asgardians of the Galaxy. I DON’T KNOW WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN WITH THIS BUT I LOVE IT WITH MY ENTIRE FUCKING SOUL YOU GUYS. Everything about Thor hanging out with the Guardians makes me so incredibly happy. I can’t wait for shenanigans. I would assume the plot of the next one is finding Gamora and bringing her home and re-teaching her about her family and falling in love with Quill again, but who knows what wackiness awaits us? I can’t deal with Thor being a little shit to Quill. I could see his Hemsworth peeking through, and I am here for it. Half the reason we all love Thor as much as we do is that Taika was one of the first people to suggest letting Hems be more like himself, and Chris Hemsworth is basically a giant, hilarious puppy, and it really made Thor more fun and likable. Don’t get me wrong—I loved my noble prince, but he was still a big golden retriever even when he was more Shakespearean and all they truly did was dial it up to be a bigger part of his personality.

Really, I like what Thor went through in Endgame and how it connects with lots of elements in previous movies. While parts could have been done better, I thought it was fantastic and it shook things up in a way that should be quite intriguing for his future appearances. Of everyone, Thor is the character I am most excited to learn about continuing to be in the MCU.

Natasha

-Natasha taking a leadership role in the Post Snap years, and her conversation with Steve. Anyone who knows me knows that I am a die-hard Captasha shipper, but more than that, I think the friendship and love (platonic or otherwise) between Nat and Steve is by far one of the best relationships in the Avengers saga. I love how it began, how it developed, and where it is when we watch this scene of them together. I love how soft and gentle Steve is with her, and yet he teases her in this subtle way that’s almost like a verbal hug. Steve is just so compassionate and conscious of her emotional needs, the same as how she has been with him. I think this is such a precious relationship and it’s vital to both of them that they have someone to confide in when times are hard. It’s possibly even more beautiful because they aren’t canonically together as a couple; they’re just two friends who have bonded and been partners ever since The Winter Soldier, and they without a doubt love each other. (Side note: and I am not alone in this because Chris Evans even ships it, and that makes me so very pleased.) I gobble up all Captasha scenes, honestly, because it’s so well written and it’s come a long way from the first time they met in Avengers. But to get a little more in depth, Nat’s brief breakdown about Clint is really something else. Seeing her struggle with the idea that the man she loves (again, platonically) has become a monster, and struggling with the idea that she should move on but she can’t because she’s lost her family, is really damn hard to watch, but it’s necessary. It’s a really good reflection of the level of loss and trauma and pain our poor Avengers have had to deal with since the Snap. It’s an excellent scene.

-Nat going after Clint to bring him home once they figure out that the time heist is at least possible. Ow. This is another scene that is a big kick in the nuts. “Don’t. Don’t give me hope.” “I’m sorry I couldn’t give it to you sooner.” Bury me, this is such a good, quiet little scene for her. I really like their friendship and their bond. When Nat mentions family in the previous scene, this is what she’s talking about, and I love how Endgame might be the first film to openly acknowledge that the Avengers are family to each other. And what I like is that this series has earned that. Nothing makes me angrier than when people drop the F-bomb where it is NOT deserved. (*side eyes Suicide Squad and Deadpool 2*) The Avengers have fought and bled for each other, have supported each other, and have loved each other through hell and back, and they ARE a family. Bringing Clint home was a big deal to her, facing her fears of what he’s become, but seeing that he is still somewhat the man she knows and loves because he does return to the fold in the end.

-Natasha’s death. Hoo boy. Okay, so like Tony and Loki, I might just stick this in my Denial category. I was hit with a huge wave of “oh no, please no” when I found out Clint and Nat would be the ones going to retrieve the Soul Stone, because of course it had to be them. However, it was thematically the right choice for it to be Clint and Nat, since I personally think the only other combination it could have been was Steve and Tony or Steve and Nat in terms of “give up that which you love” that the Red Skull illuminated is the price for the stone. I think all the team members genuinely care for each other, but if I wanted to use the word love, yes, I’d say it comes down to members of the team who truly love one another, it’s Tony and Steve, Clint and Nat, and Nat and Steve. So I am in a very weird place about Nat’s death in this movie.

First off, I love how it was handled because it couldn’t have gone any other way. Of course both of them wanted to jump on this grenade for each other. Of course they both think they are the unworthy one who should die for the other person they love. Of course they fought over it.

Here's the thing, though: from a writing standpoint, it did need to be Natasha.

And before we go further, let’s address the elephant in the room fandom-wise: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, YOU MORONS, THIS IS NOT THE ‘STUFFED IN THE FRIDGE’ TROPE. God, I hate you sometimes, MCU fandom. I knew as soon as she sacrificed herself that all the fake feminists would run into the streets and climb onto their soapboxes and try to call the Fridge trope. Shut up. It’s not a Fridge.

For those not familiar with the trope, Stuffed in the Fridge is when a typically female character is unceremoniously killed off for usually one of two reasons (1) to cause a male character to angst (2) to further or advance a male agenda somehow.

Natasha’s sacrifice is neither of these things.

First off, it was her choice. Clint made it completely clear that he loves her and he did not want her to die for him. One of the primary problems with the Fridge trope is it robs the woman of her choice, and Nat is the one who decided that she would be the one to die for the Soul Stone. Calling this a Fridge is a blatant, insulting erasure of her motivation as a character.

Second off, Nat’s death is a sacrifice that wins a war. It’s not pointless, and it’s not just for angst, and it’s not just for a male character to get ahead in the story. She literally saves trillions of lives by trading her soul for the stone. Trillions. Yes, the team is devastated, but her death is not simply there to make you shed tears and nothing else. She saved them all. So don’t you dare try to pin this dumb trope on her, because it’s not accurate or correct.

Third off, this completes Natasha’s character arc. We’re introduced to the beginning of her arc in the iconic scene of The Avengers where she tricks Loki into revealing his scheme, but it turns out that while she does succeed, we find out what motivates her, and that Loki’s cruelty did affect her in the end. Clint was sent to kill her, but he shows compassion and instead recruits her. Clint gives her a second chance. And Nat, in sacrificing herself for the Soul Stone, gives Clint a second chance. It’s come full circle. One of my all-time favorite lines in this entire film series is hers, “I got red in my ledger; I’d like to wipe it out.” That. Is. A. Fucking. Great. Line. And this is the pay off and the completion of Nat’s character arc. She’s done horrible things and they have been chains on her soul and she felt that she needed to repay her debt in this way, and in a way that would save so many innocent lives. I will not have these people running around discounting that and acting like she is some victim. Natasha Romanov is not a fucking victim. Natasha Romanov died a hero. She is one of my favorite Avengers and I cried so hard at her loss, but I acknowledge that she did a brave, selfless thing for everyone she loved, and she will be remembered for that always.

Now. That being said…if you want to complain about a female character dying in a majority male story, yes, go right ahead. That is a legitimate complaint. It sucks that Nat died when most of the team is male. I will heartily concur with this criticism and offer no counterargument. It sucks. Period. I hate that she dies in the first act because I really love her fighting style and I wanted to see her kick more ass in the final battle because she’s amazing to watch. So yes, that’s a point I do take off from this movie.

In the end, I’m sort of straddling the fence for losing Nat, as I am with Tony, but I think a lot of people feel the same way. It is great writing, but the loss is so painful that I might not accept it totally.

Thank you for your bravery, Nat. Seriously, you’re one of my favorite female leads and you’ll be sorely missed. I can only hope the Black Widow movie helps me deal with the pain of losing you.

Steve

-Steve quietly taking all of Tony’s trauma-fueled ranting. This is so important. Chris Evans is so fantastic at acting in general, but all of his expressions as Tony lays into him are so underrated, man. He knows that Tony has reached a breaking point, and so he offers no vitriol in return. It’s a huge contrast to the scene in Civil War where the two of them argue. Steve is by no means a timid man. He recognizes that Tony is in such pain, as are all of them, and he just takes that rage because he knows it’s just how Tony chose to process everything because he can’t come to terms with it. We know he blames himself for being unable to stop Thanos, same as all of them do, and it’s such a testament to what a good man Steve is that he doesn’t fire back at Tony, and he is deeply concerned for him instead. Especially when Tony throws it back in his face that they’d lose together, and that’s what hurts the most during this scene. Tony was alone when he lost. Nebula was the only survivor, and she was a complete stranger to him until they repaired the Milano and tried to get back to civilization. I think Tony would still be angry and traumatized, but he’s always been able to look to his team members for ideas or comfort or just companionship in hard times. He nearly died, and that left a mark on him that ran so deep he just couldn’t stop spitting vitriol at possibly one of his closest friends, and it’s also important that they hadn’t spoken since the end of Civil War, so all of that anger and resentment is also tangled up inside them both. What a scene, man. What a scene.

-Steve mentoring people in the Post Snap years. This has a couple of really great things as a scene, honestly. First off, I love that even with Steve being heartbroken and refusing to move on, he still knows it is important to help others. Second off, I love that it’s almost implied that this is in honor of Sam Wilson, who did the same thing for soldiers who returned home from war struggling with PTSD. I really, really love Steve Rogers with all my heart for this scene. Even though he’s broken down and just as devastated as everyone else, he is still out there trying to help others. That is who he is at his core. Steve is the man who cannot stand by and let other people suffer. He won’t do it. It doesn’t matter what it costs him. He will defend and protect and nurture, always. By God, I love that about him.

-Steve’s quiet reconciliation with Tony. We discussed this above, but I love that Steve says so few words here and lets Tony do all the talking. There’s an almost silent “I’m sorry and I love you and I want you to be happy” in this scene together. Tony bringing back the shield just…my feelings…oh God, my feelings.

-Steve’s miniature speech before they head into the Quantum Realm. I love that even Rocket is impressed.

-Steve’s reaction to Nat’s death. Fuck. Me. Up. This hurt so badly. I can’t. I can’t with how Steve looks at Clint and Clint just looks back at him, and you can almost hear him telepathically saying, “Steve, we lost her.” Like I said before, Steve and Clint without a doubt love Natasha. Yes, Bruce does to some degree, but it’s not the same (sorry, y’all, I think BruceNat was trash and I will never accept it because it was forced and awkward and made no sense to me) as the deep vein of friendship and love she had with both men. It killed me when they were out on the dock and Steve was openly crying for her. We saw Steve crying in the trailer but we didn’t know this was the context. Oh, this hurts me. Steve loved her with all his heart. She was his best friend, same as Sam and Bucky were, and to lose her with no chance of ever getting her back is a terrible, terrible loss. Boy, this scene was rough to endure. I can only imagine how he must have felt having to let her go after he’s lost so many people he loved. Poor Steve.

-The entire New York heist. Oh God. I’m just in heaven over how Steve handled things, everything from the intentional recreation of the iconic elevator scene in The Winter Soldier to the insidious “Hail Hydra” (*makes strangulation hands in the direction of the Russo brothers because they KNOW most of the fandom hates Hydra Cap from the comics and so of course they put that in there just to screw with us*) to the smug smirk on Cap’s face as he walked away with scepter to Cap laying the beatdown on himself to Cap acknowledging his sweet, sweet, round, perfectly firm ass. (Seriously, Chris Evans, if you ever read this, marry me, we already met and hugged each other, we could make this work.) Yes. Special props to Cap vs. Cap’s interactions. It was just…everything.

-Steve wielding Mjolnir. Jesus. Fucking. Christ. So everyone’s already raved about this scene, but I don’t care, I have to rave about it too. Good gravy. Good God. This scene is everything. Honestly, it is easily one of the greatest things ever conceived not only by the MCU, but in action movies period. This can stand toe to toe with some of the best beatdowns in all of cinema. It’s just…where do you even start with how good this fucking scene is?! I mean, every second of it is just glorious. Whether it was the Russos or Evans or the script writers, whoever I need to thank, THANK YOU. Thank you for gift wrapping this total surprise. Every one of us was wounded that Cap didn’t easily lift Mjolnir in Age of Ultron, but at the same time, I loved the humor of that scene when Mjolnir did actually start to move and Thor totally panicked for a second. It was funny as hell. But for the Russos to fulfill our fantasy in a way that was not only a surprise, but just an absolute joy to watch, I can’t even express my fangirl tears. This scene is better than sex and chocolate and cocaine. It’s flawless. Everything about it is flawless, from Steve summoning the goddamn lightning to Thor’s gleeful “I KNEW IT!” I wish I could frame this scene on my wall in .gif form, and I apologize in advance to all my Tumblr followers, because the second this scene is giffed after the DVD release, I am going to reblog it three billion times. I will never stop reblogging it. This is the height of MCU perfection and it deserves to be known as such.

-Steve facing off with Thanos in his last stand, and actually holding his own. Dude. Steve Rogers is a human man, and he withstood Thanos. I just…I can’t with how awesome it is. He lost in the end, but he beat the shit out of Thanos for a good bit and I just have to give him all the props for that. He did the impossible and survived him. That’s amazing.

-Steve strapping on his broken shield and staring down Thanos and his army. This is peak Steve Rogers right here. “Yeah, you have thousands of soldiers. Yeah, you sheared my shield in half. Yeah, you beat me and my comrades. And I don’t give a single solitary fuck.” This is also an amazing echo to the moment in Infinity War where poor Wanda had to kill Vision, and Cap stood up to Thanos with his goddamn bare hands. Steve standing up after getting the shit kicked out of him is what he is all about. He doesn’t care that he is outnumbered. He doesn’t care that he is outgunned. He is Steve motherfucking Rogers and he is going to stand against evil period. This is top tier stuff, man.

-“Avengers Assemble.” Like everyone else, I jizzed in my pants. Full on. We all had a hunch that they would save it until the final Avengers film with the final appearances of the original team, and it was everything we dreamt it would be.

-Steve catching Stormbreaker as well and then trading it with Thor mid-battle. A tiny but hilariously awesome scene. I’m so glad they included it, and it was another little nod to Steve and Thor always having a small adorable friendship moment in each Avengers movie. Thanks for that, truly.

-Steve passing the mantle over to Sam Wilson. Holy shit. So a lot of us were relatively sure with Chris Evans confirming this as his last full appearance as Captain America that the mantle would go to either Bucky or Sam. My money was on Sam, simply for him still being new blood having entered at Phase 2 in the MCU, and because Sam is a lot more of a dynamic main lead that I think the MCU needs in the role. Anthony Mackie, as any hardcore MCU fans know, is a bundle of fun behind the scenes. He’s really hilarious and charismatic, and I think he’ll bring a lot to the role of the new Captain America. It’s such a touching scene as Steve hands him the shield. I really, really get choked up about how it was handled with such respect and trust and honest to God friendship. “How does it feel?” “Like it’s someone else’s.” “It isn’t.” Wow. What a beautiful scene. I’m a little misty as I type it out. And I do like that there was just this little nod from Bucky, who has been antagonistic to him pretty much all the time but here, he shows his support and it’s kind of just known that he will back Sam up no matter what. I cannot express how much I love this idea and its execution. It was perfect. (By the way, please look up the way Anthony Mackie found out about this before filming. It’s too cute.)

-Steve’s ending. Oh my God. Of possibly everyone on the team who I wanted to have a happy ending, I wanted Steve’s the hardest, even though I love Tony to death and beyond. Thank you, Russo brothers. Thank you for letting this man have his second chance at a life, and that he got to spend it with Peggy. I was already crying from the funeral, but the fact that they decided to end the saga with possibly the sweetest imagery in the MCU is just overwhelming. I loved their little slow dance. I love the tears of joy on Peggy’s cheeks. I love the softness in Steve’s expression as he dances with his lady love. I love the song choice. I love how he just looks down at her and she looks up at him and they kiss to close everything out and say goodbye to us all. What a scene. What an ending. I love it more than anything.

Thank you, Steve. Thank you for being our ray of light and sunshine and guidance all these years.

Nebula

I really did not expect to see an arc for Nebula, but I am delighted that we got it. This was very, very interesting considering what a sadistic murderess Nebula was in the previous films, so fueled by rage, and yet here we see that she is still powerful and effective and yet vulnerable. I enjoyed seeing her growth and getting some amount of closure with Thanos’ demise and saving Gamora as well as the rest of the universe.

Bruce

So here’s the thing: Bruce is probably my least favorite Avenger, next to Clint, but that’s not because anything is wrong with either character—I just find their personalities and abilities the least interesting. Therefore, I’ve heard complaints about Hulk not kicking ass in Infinity War and Endgame, and while they are valid points…I don’t care. I guess the thing is that Hulk has kicked ass in all his previous appearances, and I think it was nice of them to get back to the fact that Bruce is indeed a scientist and there is more to him than just crushing things. He is a very conscience driven character, and I was totally fine with him as a supporting member of the team, and of his brave decision to Un-Snap everyone back to life. I especially liked his sympathetic approach to bring Thor back home. “You helped me.” I fully admit that made my lip quiver, honestly, since Thor was obviously so traumatized and was in a lot of pain, and Bruce was gentle with him. That, to me, is just as important as all the bashing he could have done. Same with his impassioned plea with the Ancient One. Sorry that he didn’t kick ass in these last two movies, but honestly, I felt things were balanced and that it’s important to show he is more than the Hulk.

Clint

As mentioned above, Clint is my least favorite Avenger, but again, not because there is anything wrong with him or that he is written poorly—the others just outweigh him in what I like about them. I have to say opening the film with Clint losing his entire family with no knowledge of what was going on was almost as gut-stabbing as how Infinity War began and ended. It was somehow even more cruel since Clint would not have known what was going on until he called the Avengers. And yes, someone’s pointed out to me that it’s crazy he didn’t know about the war, but I have a headcanon that he just cut everyone off once he decided to retire, and he wouldn’t answer when they called so he wouldn’t be dragged into more shenanigans. I highly doubt the whole team just flat-out didn’t tell him what was going on. There’s a good chance Clint decided not to hear from the team again after Cap busted them out since he risked everything and almost got jailed for life after his decision.

All that being said, I did feel Clint’s loss very hard after Nat sacrificed herself. It was extremely well done on Jeremy Renner’s part and there was never a doubt that he loved her. Their bond has always been very cute and I never shipped them, so I wasn’t disappointed by the reveal of his secret family. I thought it was a nice touch and a surprising turn in the story. I’m glad he got to go home to his family in the end, and I especially liked the touching moment he shared with Wanda after Tony’s funeral.

Loki

Holy shit, y’all.

I did not expect this, and I love it more than anything in the world.

Right, so, I am sadly a fan of Loki’s ever since The Dark World, but at the very least, I am not a rabid fan of the character. He is an absolute fucking trashlord and I acknowledge it while still loving him anyway. I was positively giddy that they invited Tom Hiddleston back to shoot new scenes of Loki rather than simply using the old Avengers footage. And I definitely didn’t expect Tony, Cap, and Scott to screw up and Loki gets the Tesseract and vanishes. This is amazing. I can’t wait for the Loki mini-series on Disney Plus, and I assume this is what it’s going to be about. I’m really excited to see what kind of shit he gets himself into, and I loved the little bits we got of him mocking Cap even though they all just kicked his ass, and I loved him rolling his eyes in the background during the heist, and being the only one who knew something fishy was going on. Love, love, love it to pieces. Thank you for giving me more of my stupid trashlord, Endgame. You rock.

Scott

Oh, poor, poor Scott. Not only did he awaken to find his new family gone, but he lost five years of time with his daughter. Ouch. I really have to commend Paul Rudd for the reunion scene with his daughter. The shock and pain mixed in with the gratitude that she survived the Snap was so palpable. I’ve never really considered him much more than an easy going comedic actor, but he did a great job here. Kudos.

Gamora

I am really, really deeply hurt that this means our Gamora, the one we came to know and grow with, is truly gone. Like many fans, I had hoped she was somehow inside the Soul Stone and they could bust her out, but like Nat, it appears that we did truly lose her. I’m not okay. I feel so bad for Quill, who wooed her with so many great moments, and now he’s lost her again. He’ll have to try to make her fall in love with him again, and it hurts me because the sequence of events from the first two Guardians movies are how they fell in love, and it’ll be so much harder to make her understand what they meant to each other and what they had with one another as well as their little stitched together family. Damn it all. This might be one of the biggest underrated losses of all for me. Gamora is my favorite Guardian, period. I adore her, so I am both anticipating and dreading the third Guardians movie as a result.

Carol

Alright, I do have to admit one of my letdowns, even though it’s a total nitpick, is that the trailer gave us Thor and Carol, but the actual movie did not. Oh, why did you lift my hopes up this way?! I really wanted Thor and Carol to bond and have hilarious pissing contests about who is the strongest Avenger, and become battle buddies! However, this might be possible later since we know Hemsworth has agreed to at least one more film, if not more, so fingers crossed he and Carol share screentime. I adored that “I like this one” scene and Thor would play very well off of Carol if you ask me.

That being said, when Carol came back for the final fight…yassss bitch yassss fuck it up! When she came after Thanos, he was fuckin’ shook and I am here for it. I loved that failed headbutt. I want to frame that on a wall. Carol Danvers is not having any of your shit today, you purple Grape Ape punk ass bitch. She laid down the law, and it was glorious. 11/10 good shit of Carol whupping his ass and he had to suckerpunch her just to try to win.

And kudos for the utterly adorable interaction she had with my Spider Son, “H-Hi, I’m Peter Parker.” “Hey, Peter Parker. Got something for me?” *kisses fingertips* This could not have been cuter. Thank you so much, Carol.

Oh, and extra kudos for the Ladies of the MCU smackdown moment. My God. I loved every second of that assault. Please make that into a whole separate team someday and make a movie about it.

Wanda

Standing ovation for Wanda in every respect: her entrance, her powerful line (“I don’t even know who you are.” “You will.”), and the fact that she flat-out almost killed Thanos by her damn self. Wow, wow, wow, my girl. You brought the pain. I miss Vision too, honey, and I’m so sorry we can’t have him back. It’s so unfair that she’s lost her brother and her love within this story, but she still manages to keep going. Wanda is a testament to just how strong women truly are in spite of adversity.

Plot/Story

I know some fans didn’t want it to be as straight-forward as it appeared to be with them going back in time to grab the Stones and undo the Snap, but I was honestly fine with it. The story still managed to genuinely surprise me, especially with the development that the two Nebulas are what caused Thanos to find out what was going on. Holy shit, that was very creative and a great way to let her be a central character considering the trauma she has been through and overcome. I thought the pacing was excellent, and I will have to sit down and think it through but I don’t feel as if we had unnecessary scenes aside from the diner scene being a little longer than it needed to be. (You could have cut the photo op bit out and no one would miss it, for instance.) Like Infinity War, I felt that all the scenes had a use and showed us something, and the action was magnificent and creative. The Avengers pulling the entirety of the MCU together in the third act is some seriously iconic stuff that I really hope people will take into consideration as a legendary thing no one has ever really done before.

A friend of mine mentioned that you can neatly divide Endgame into three sections of story: build up, heist, and pay off. One of the best things about Endgame, to me, is the pay off. I love how many continuity nods we had and how many threads were tied off in a satisfying manner, from deeply emotional relationships to just sublime action sequences. We have so many films in this series that it’s hard to rank them, but I have to say I really would put Endgame in the top 10 for my preferences. It was a worthy ending to such an amazing set of films, and while I will miss the actors who won’t continue past Phase 3, I am incredibly grateful for their time and talents spent on this franchise. It is in its own category, honestly, with consistent quality in nearly every aspect it attempts. I think it was the perfect mix of solemn but affectionate goodbyes and bright, hopeful new beginnings. I am excited to see what is in store and what new ground we’re gonna break with the future stories.

So thanks for everything, Endgame. I’m glad to have had this era come to such a satisfying close.

See you in the funny papers.

Kyoko

#avengers #avengers endgame #endgame #spoilers #movie review #film review #the avengers #marvel #Marvel Cinematic Universe #mcu #spoiler alert #no really this is 14 pages long #i am so sorry but i had a lot of feelings okay #sorry not sorry

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kabane52 · 5 years

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The War Within

This is an old article from Christianity Today from 1982

Driving through Wisconsin on vacation this summer, a Leadership staff member passed a huge sign in the middle of the bucolic countryside. "Naughty Things for Nice People," it proclaimed, and as if to prove it, a gigantic cuddly bear peered out from beside the words "Adult Novelties."

"What's that mean, Dad?" came the question from the ten-year-old boy in the back of the van. "Yeah," piped up the siblings, "what's that all about, Dad?"

Such questions abound these days, as media penetrate our homes and vehicles with not just sleazy sex but carefully packaged titillations. One report has it that a recent convention of youth pastors created the highest rental of X-rated movies in the hotel's history. More than 80 percent of all customers signing up for cable TV opt for the erotic films. The availability—the near-ubiquity of so much sexual enticement, the constant barrage of innuendoes, and the nonstop polemic for indulgence inevitably attracts.

Many rationales tempt the mind of the Christian leader: "I have to know what's going on. … Voyeurism is better than adultery. … I need moderation—total deprivation isn't necessary."

Admittedly, there are no easy answers. We cannot shut off either our brains or our glands. But consider the following article by a man in full-time ministry. The article is blunt. But we felt it important to be just this honest and realistic. Sexual temptations in many forms have always lured Christians, but today's opportunities and climate make this article especially relevant to all of us.

* * *

"Lust is the ape that gibbers in our loins. Tame him as we will by day, he rages all the wilder in our dreams by night. Just when we think we're safe from him, he raises up his ugly head and smirks, and there's no river in the world flows cold and strong enough to strike him down. Almighty God, why dost thou deck men out with such a loathsome toy?" Frederick Buechner Godric I am writing this article anonymously because I am embarrassed. Embarrassed for my wife and children, yes, but embarrassed most for myself. I will tell of my personal battle with lust, and if I believed I were the only one who fought in that war, I would not waste emotional energy dredging up stained and painful memories. But I believe my experience is not uncommon, is perhaps even typical of pastors, writers, and conference speakers. No one talks about it. No one writes about it. But it's there, like an unacknowledged cancer that metastasizes best when no one goes for x-rays or feels for lumps.

I know I am not alone, because the few times I have opened up and shared my struggles with Christian friends, they have replied with Doppelganger stories of exactly the same stages of awakening, obsession, possession. Years from now, when socio-historians sift through the documents describing our times, they will undoubtedly come up with elegant explanations of why men who grew up in church homes are oversexed and vulnerable to attacks of lust and obsession, and why women who grew up in those same environments emerged uptight and somewhat disinterested in sex. But I leave that to the future analysts.

I remember vividly the night I first experienced lust. Real lust—not the high school and college variety. Of course as an adolescent I had drooled through Playboy, sneaked off to my uncle's room for a heart-thumping first look at hard-core pornography, and done my share of grappling and fumbling with my fiancee's clothes. I date my lust awakening, though, to the adult onslaught of mature, willful commitment to lust.

It hit on one of my first trips away from home. My job required me to travel at that time, and as I sat in a dingy motel room near the airport and flipped through the city guide of what to do in Rochester, New York, I kept coming back to one haunting photo of an exotic dancer, a former Miss Peach Bowl winner, the ad said. She looked fresh and inviting: the enchanting kind of Southern girl you see on TV commercials for fried chicken—only this one had no clothes on.

Somehow, I had survived the sixties sheltered from strippers and Woodstock-type nudity. And when I first saw the ad, I instinctively ruled her show out of bounds for me. But as I settled down to watch an inane TV show, her body kept looming before my mind with the simple question, "Why not?"

I began to think. Indeed, why not? To be an effective Christian, I had to experience all of life, right? Didn't Jesus himself hang around with prostitutes and sinners? I could go simply as an observer, in the world but not of the world. Rationalizations leaped up like flying buttresses to support my desires, and within ten minutes I was bundled in the back seat of a taxi headed toward the seamy side of Rochester.

I got the driver to let me off a few blocks away, just for safety's sake, and I kept glancing over my shoulder expecting to see someone I knew. Or perhaps God would step in, efface my desires, and change my mind about the wisdom of the act. I even asked him about that, meekly. No answer.

I walked into the bar between acts and was then faced with the new experience of ordering a drink. My forehead sweating, I scanned my memory of Westerns for an appropriate drink to order. Finally I decided on whiskey. I tried to make it sound casual, but the waitress flummoxed me by asking another question.

"How do you want it?"

How do I want it? What did she mean? What could I say? It seemed everyone in the bar was staring at me.

"A double," I stammered.

Sensing my naiveté, she rolled her eyes slightly and asked, "Is on the rocks OK?"

Bolstered by my first fiery sips of whiskey, which I tried to stretch out so as not to have to order another, I sat with my eyes glued to the stage.

Miss Peach Bowl was everything the ad had promised. With a figure worthy of a Wonder Woman costume, she danced superbly and was something of an acrobat. She started fully clothed and teased us with slow removals of each sequined article of clothing. Toward the end, when she wore only a G— string, whooping men near the stage bade her lean over and stuffed folded bills under the tiny swatch of cloth. She grinned invitingly. I stared in disbelief. In one final strobe-lit routine she cartwheeled nude across the stage.

The flush of excitement created by my first whiskey, drunk too fast in spite of myself, the eyepopping spectacle of this gorgeous woman baring all and jiggling it in front of me, and the boisterous spirit of the all-male audience combined to overpower me. I walked out of the bar two hours later feeling strangely warmed, intensely excited, and surprised that nothing had actually happened to me. I suppose it's the same feeling that washes in after a big event like marriage, or graduation, or first intercourse for that matter. In just a few hours, you realize that although in one sense everything has changed, in another sense nothing has changed. You are the same person.

Lust shares with sins like envy and pride the distinction of being invisible, slippery, hard to pin down. Was what happened that night a sin? I denied it to myself on the way home. To really rate as lust, I told myself, you must look on a woman so as to desire sexual intercourse with her. Isn't that what Jesus said? Whatever happened that night, I certainly couldn't recall desiring intercourse with Miss Peach Bowl. It was more private and distant than that. What happened, happened quickly, was gone, and left no scars. Or so I thought at the time.

Ten years have passed since that awakening in wintry Rochester, ten years spent never far from the presence of lust. The guilt caught up with me, and back in my motel room that very evening, I was already praying slobbery prayers for forgiveness. For a while that guilt kept me out of live shows and limited my voyeurism to magazines and movies, but only for a while. For ten years I have fought unremitting guerrilla warfare.

Being the reflective sort, I have often pondered the phenomenon of lust. It is unlike anything else in my experience. Most thrills—scary roller coasters, trips in airplanes, visits to waterfalls—lose a certain edge of excitement once I have experienced them and figured them out. I enjoy them and will duplicate the experiences if given the chance, but after a few tries, they no longer hold such a powerful gravitational attraction.

Sex is utterly different. There is only so much to "figure out." Every person who endures high school biology, let alone a sniggering sex education class, knows the basic shapes, colors, and sizes of the sexual organs. Anyone who has been to an art museum knows about women's breasts. Anyone who has hauled down a gynecology book in a public library knows about genitalia. Somehow, no amount of knowledge reduces the appeal—the forces may, in fact, work concordantly. What strange power is it that allows a male gynecologist to clinically examine female sexual organs all day long—there is nothing left for him to "learn"—and yet return home and find himself quickly aroused by his wifely peekaboo blouse?

"An ape that gibbers in my loins," wrote novelist Frederick Buechner about lust, and no experience comes with such a feral force. And yet, maybe by labeling it an "animal drive" we have missed the main point of lust. No animal I have heard of spends its life fixating on sex. Females in most species invite attention only a few times a year or less; the rest of the time males obediently plod through the mundane routine of phylogeny, apparently never giving sex another thought.

Humans are different. We have the freedom to center our lives inordinately in this one drive, without the harmony enforced by nature. Our females are biologically receptive the vast majority of the time, and no instinct inhibits us from focusing all our thoughts, behavior, and energy on sex.

I have tried to analyze lust, to fractionate it down into its particulars. I take a Playboy centerfold and study it with a magnifying glass. It consists only of dots—dots of four primary colors laid down by a printing press in a certain order. There is no magic on that page, only stipples of ink, which under magnification, show flaws and blurs. But there is magic on that page. I can stare at it, burn the image in my mind, fondle it mentally for hours, even days. Blood steams up when I gaze on it.

Early Marxists, heady with revolution, added sex to their list of human foibles needing alteration. Lenin pronounced his famous Glass of Water Theory, legislating that the sexual act was of no more consequence than the quenching of thirst by a glass of water. Surely bourgeois morality would topple along with bourgeois banks and industries and religions. But in a few years, Lenin had to abjure the Glass of Water Theory. By all reductionist logic, sex was like a glass of water, but sex proved immune to reductionist logic. It resisted being made of no consequence. Lenin, a historian, should have known better. Kings had renounced their thrones, saints their God, and spouses their lifetime partners because of this strange demon of lust. Dialectical materialism hardly stood a chance.

Books often question God's wisdom or goodness in allowing so much pain and sorrow in the world, and yet I have read none that question his goodness and wisdom in allowing so much sex and lust in the world. But I think the two may be parallel questions. Whether through creation or marred creation or whatever (we can't get into that here), we ended up with sex drives that virtually impel us to break rules God laid down. Males reach their sexual peak at age eighteen, scientists tell us. In our culture, you can't even legally marry before then, so when a male marries, if he has remained chaste, he has already forfeited his time of greatest sexual prowess. Mark Twain railed against God for parceling out to each human a source of universal joy and pleasure, at its peak in teenage years, then forbidding it until marriage and restricting it to one partner. He has a point.

Couldn't our hormones or chromosomes have been arranged so that mates would more easily find sexual satisfaction with just one partner? Why weren't we made more like the animals, who, except for specified periods, go through their daily routine (nude to a beast) with hardly a thought of sex. I could handle lust better if I knew it would only strike me in October or May. It's the not knowing, the ceaseless vulnerability, that drives me crazy.

Lust, I read somewhere, is the craving for salt by a man who is dying of thirst. There's a touch of perversion there, isn't there? Why were we not made with merely a craving for water, thus removing the salt from every newsstand, television show, and movie?

I know what you are thinking, you readers of Leadership. You are protesting that God never makes me lust, that I choose it, that he probably allows it as an opportunity for me to exercise my virtue. Yes, yes, I understand all that. But some of you know firsthand, as I do, that those pious platitudes, albeit perfectly correct, have almost no relevance to what happens biologically inside me when I visit a local beach or pick up any of a hundred magazines.

Some of you know what it is like to walk with your eyes at breast level, to flip eagerly through every new issue of Time searching for a rare sexy picture, to yearn for chains on the outside of your motel room to keep you in—unless it comes with that most perverse of all modern inventions, the in-room porno movie. And you also know what it is like to wallow in the guilt of that obsession, and to cry and pray with whatever faith you can muster, to plead with God to release you, to mutate you, to castrate you like Origen—whatever it takes to deliver you. And even as you pray, luscious, bewitching images crowd into your mind.

You also know what it is like to preach on Sunday, in a strange city, to preach even on a topic like grace or obedience or the will of God, or the decline of our civilization, with the awful and wonderful memories of last night's lust still more real to you at that moment than the sea of expectant faces spread out before you. You know the self-hatred that comes with that intolerable dissonance. And you muddle through the sermon swearing never to let it get to you like that again, until after the service a shapely woman comes beaming and squeezes your hand and whispers praise to you, and all resolve melts, and as she explains how blessed she was by your message, you are mentally undressing her.

The night in Rochester was my first experience with adult lust, but by no means my last. Strip joints are too handy these days. The drug store down the street sells Hustler, High Society, Jugs, anything you want. I have been to maybe fifteen truly pornographic movies, including the few classics like Deep Throat and Behind the Green Door. They scare me, perhaps because it seems so deliberate and volitional to stand in line (always glancing around furtively), to pay out money and to sit in the dark for an hour or two. The crowd is unlike any other crowd I mix with—they remind me I don't belong. And the movies, technically, aesthetically, and even erotically, are vapid and boring. But still, when a local paper advertises one more Emmanuelle sequel, I drool.

I learned quickly that lust, like physical sex, points in only one direction. You cannot go back to a lower level and stay satisfied. Always you want more. A magazine excites, a movie thrills, a live show really makes the blood run. I never got as far as body tattooing, personal photograph sessions, and massages, let alone outright prostitution, but I've experienced enough of the unquenchable nature of sex to frighten me for good. Lust does not satisfy; it stirs up. I no longer wonder how deviants can get into child molesting, masochism, and other abnormalities. Although such acts are incomprehensible to me, I remember well that where I ended up was also incomprehensible to me when I started.

A cousin of mine subscribes to at least fifteen of the raunchiest magazines I have ever seen. Books I have peeked at for just a few seconds in airport newsstands litter his house. He has told me that, even surrounded by vivid depictions of every sex act, every size and shape of woman he can imagine, he still wants more. He still devours the new issues. He and his wife are experimenting with orgies now, and numerous other variations I won't mention. It is not enough. The thrill will fade before long, and he will want more.

Psychologists use the term obsession to label what I have been describing, and they may say that I have more innate obsession than the average male. They would trace its genesis back to my repressive upbringing, and they are undoubtedly right. That is why I am writing to others of you in the Christian world. If you have not fought such obsession yourself, every Sunday when you step to the pulpit you speak to many who have, although you could hardly read it in their blank, freshly scrubbed faces. Lust is indeed an invisible sin.

At times the obsession has felt to me more like possession. I remember one time especially that scared me. I was in Washington, D.C., one of the places in the United States where any kind of lust is easily attainable. At three o'clock in the afternoon, after touring the cherry blossoms, I sauntered into a dark bar that advertised nude dancing. I fended off the girls who came to my table and asked for drinks, and instead directed my attention to the dancers. There were only two, and maybe five customers at most. One black girl with an unspectacular figure weaved over to the part of the stage nearest my table.

This was somewhat different than the other strip shows I had seen. There was no teasing or "visual foreplay." She was already naked, unashamedly so, and she wiggled maybe a foot from my head. She stared right into my eyes. This was so close, so intimate, that it seemed for a terrifying moment to be nearer a relationship than a performance. What I felt could only be called possession.

I found myself—it seemed as though I had not made the decision, that someone else's hands inside mine were doing it—fumbling in my pocket, pulling out bills and stuffing them in a garter belt high up on her thigh. In appreciation she maneuvered herself to grant an even better view. She had no secrets.

I staggered out of that bar. I felt I had crossed a line and could never return to innocence. That weekend I had important business engagements, but throughout them indelible images of that anonymous girl filled my mind. I yearned to flee and go home to my wife, to demonstrate to her my fear so that she could shelter me and mother me and keep me from following where all this was leading.

Just a few years before, I had sat with a distant, reproachful view and watched men lose control and act like country-fair churls as they stuffed bills down the G-string of Miss Peach Bowl. I would never stoop to that—I was smugly confident in Rochester. After all, I was intelligent, happily married, sophisticated—a committed Christian known by friends for my self-control. It would never happen. But it did.

When I went home, I did not tell my wife. How could I? The story was too long, and she, who had hardly ever known lust and had never been unfaithful to me, would not comprehend it. It would likely rupture my marriage, and then I would be cast loose on a sea I could not navigate.

I made a vow then—one more in a series. I vowed I would only look at Playboy and other "respectable" erotic magazines. No more raunchiness. I had certain rationalizations about lust, and pained realism about my inability to stay pure. I simply needed some safe boundaries, I decided. Here are some of my rationalizations that supported my conclusion to contain, not destroy, my lust:

Nudity is art. Go to any art museum in the world, and you will see nudity openly displayed. The human form is beautiful, and it would be puritanical to cut off appreciation for it. Playboy is photographed well, with an aesthetic, not prurient tone. Playboy and its kin have great articles. There's the Jimmy Carter interview, for example, and Penthouse's conversation with Jerry Falwell. I must keep up with such material. An aesthetic, not prurient tone. Some stimulation will help my sex life. I have a problem approaching my wife and communicating my desire for sex to her. I need a sort of boost, a stimulant to push me to declare my intentions. An aesthetic, not prurient tone. Other people do far worse. I know many Christian leaders who still do all the things I toyed with, and worse. For that matter, look at Bible characters—as randy a bunch as you'll ever meet. There's probably no such thing as a pure person anyway; everybody has some outlet. An aesthetic, not prurient tone. What is lust anyhow, I kept asking myself. Is fantasizing wrong in itself? If so, then erotic dreams would count as sin, and how could I be responsible for my dreams? I reminded myself of the definition of lust I had started with long before: desiring intercourse with a specific sexual partner. I experienced a general sexual heightening, a raising of the voltage, not a specific desire for the act of intercourse. Some, perhaps all, of these rationalizations contain some truth. (Do they sound familiar?) I used them as an overlay of reason and common sense to help calm the cognitive dissonance that tormented me. Yet I knew inside that the lust I experienced was not subject to reason and common sense. To my dismay, on several occasions I had already felt it burst out of containment and take on a sinister power. At other times, I could analyze lust and put it in perspective, but at the moment when it was occurring I knew I would not stop and analyze. I would let it take its course. Secretly, I began to wonder what that course would be.

Don't let me give the wrong impression. My entire life did not revolve around lust. I would go days without fixating on sex, and sometimes a month or two without seeking out a pornographic magazine or movie. And many, many times I would cry out to God, imploring him to take away the desire. Why were my prayers not answered? Why did God continue to curse me with freedom, even when that freedom led me away from him?

I read numerous articles and books on temptation but found little help. If you boiled down all the verbiage and the ten-point lists of practical advice for coping with temptation, basically all they said was "Just stop doing it." That was easy to say. I knew some of those authors, and knew that they too struggled and failed, as I did. In fact, I too had preached many a sermon on handling temptation, but look at me. Practical "how-to" articles proved hopelessly inadequate, as if they said "Stop being hungry" to a starving man. Intellectually I might agree with their theology and their advice, but my glands would still secrete. What insight can change glands?

"Jesus was tempted in all points as you are," some of the articles and books would say, as if that would cheer me up. It did not help. In the first place, none of the authors could conceivably describe how Jesus experienced sexual temptation, because he never talked about it, and no one else has ever been perfect and lived to tell about it. Such well-meaning comments reminded me of telling a ghetto dweller in East Bronx, "Oh, President Reagan used to be poor too. He knows how you feel." Try telling that to a poor person, and prepare to duck.

I felt a similar reaction when I read accounts of people who had overcome lust. Usually, they wrote or talked in a condescending, unctuous tone. Or, like Jesus, they seemed too far removed from my own spiritual quagmire to comfort me. Augustine described his condition twelve years after conversion from his lusty state. In that advanced spiritual place he prayed to overcome these besetting sins: the temptation to enjoy his food instead of taking it as a necessary medicine "until the day when Thou wilt destroy both the belly and the meat"; the attraction of sweet scents; the pleasure of the ear provided by church music lest he be "more moved by the singing than by the thing that is sung"; the lure of the eye to "diverse forms of beauty, of brilliant and pleasing colors"; and last, the temptation of "knowing for knowing's sake." Sorry, Augustine, I respect you, but prayers like that led to the climate of repression and body-hatred that I have been vainly trying to escape all my life.

I got a perverse pleasure out of knowing that this same Augustine a few years earlier had prayed, "Give me chastity, but not yet." He delayed purity for a while also, to sample more delights than I would likely get around to. Why is it that I scoffed at accounts of saints who overcame temptation but loved hearing about those who gave in? There must be a name for that sin, too.

Most of this time I hated sex. I could not imagine it existing in any sort of balance in my life. Of course I knew its pleasure—that was the gravitational attraction—but those short bursts of pleasure were horribly counterbalanced by days of guilt and anguish. I could not reconcile my technicolor fantasy life with my more mundane experience of sex in marriage. I began to view sex as another of God's mistakes, like tornadoes and earthquakes. In the final analysis, it only caused misery. Without it, I could conceive of becoming pure and godly and all those other things the Bible exhorted me toward. With sex, any spiritual development seemed hopelessly unattainable. Maybe Origen had the right idea after all.

It is true there is difficulty in entering into godliness. But this difficulty does not arise from the religion which begins in us, but only from the irreligion which is still there. If our senses were not opposed to penitence, and if our corruption were not opposed to the purity of God, there would be nothing in this painful to us. We suffer only in proportion as the vice which is natural to us resists supernatural grace. Our heart feels torn asunder between these opposed efforts. But it would be very unfair to impute this violence to God, who is drawing us on, instead of to the world, which is holding us back. It is as a child, which a mother tears from the arms of robbers, in the pain it suffers, should love the loving and legitimate violence of her who procures its liberty, and detest only the impetuous and tyrannical violence of those who detain it unjustly. The most cruel war which God can make with men in this life is to leave them without that war which He came to bring. "I came to send war," He says, "and to teach them of this ware I came to bring fire and the sword." Before Him the world lived in this false peace. Blaise Pascal Pensees This article is divided into two parts. The first part, which you have just read, recounts the downward spiral of temptation, yielding, self-hatred, and despair. If I had read this article several years ago, I would have gleefully affirmed every thing. Then, when I got to the second part, which describes a process of healing, I would have turned cynical and sour, rejecting what follows. Such is the nature of self-deception.

I have described my slide in some detail not to feed any prurient interests in the reader (after all, how many racy articles have you read in Leadership?) and certainly not to nourish your own despair if you too are floundering—God forbid. I tell my struggles because they are real, but also to demonstrate that hope exists, that God is alive, and his grace can interrupt the terrible cycle of lust and despair. My primary message is one of hope, although until healing did occur, I had no faith that it ever would.

Scores, maybe hundreds of times I had prayed for deliverance, with no response. The theologians would find some fault in my prayers, or in the faith with which I prayed them. But can any person assume the awful right to judge the prayers of another who writhes in mental torment and an agony of helpless unspirituality? I would certainly never assume the right, not after a decade—long war against lust.

I have not mentioned the effect of lust on my marriage. It did not destroy my marriage, did not push me out to find more sexual excitation in an adulterous affair, or with prostitutes, did not even impel me to place unrealistic demands on my wife's sexual performance. The effect was far more subtle. Mainly, I think, it cumulatively caused me to devalue my wife as a sexual being. The great lie promulgated by Playboy, television commercials, and racy movies is that the physical ideal of beauty is attainable and oh, so close. I stare at a Playboy centerfold. Miss October has such a warm, inviting smile. She is with me alone, in my living room. She removes her clothes, just for me, and lets me see all of her. She tells me about her favorite books and what she likes in a man. Cheryl Tiegs, in the famous Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue, sweetly walks toward the camera, letting the coral blush of her breasts shine out boldly from underneath a net bikini. She lets me see them—she has no inhibitions, no pudency.

The truth is, of course, that if I sat next to either Cheryl Tiegs or Miss October on an airplane, she would not give me the time of day, let alone take off her clothes for me. If I tried to strike up a conversation, she would brush me off. And yet, because I have stared at Cheryl's breasts and gone over every inch of Miss October as well as the throng of beauties that Madison Avenue and Hollywood recruit to tantalize the masses, I start to view my own wife in that light. I expect her to have Farrah's smile, Cheryl's voluptuousness, Angie's legs, Miss October's flaming red hair and sparkling eyes. Envy and greed join hands with lust. I begin to focus on my wife's minor flaws. I lose sight of the fact that she is a charming, warm, attractive woman and that I am fortunate to have found her.

Beyond that, lust affected my marriage in an even more subtle and pernicious way. Over time, I began to view sex schizophrenically. Sex in marriage was one thing. We performed OK, though not as often as I liked, and accompanied by typical misunderstandings. But passion, ah, that was something different. Passion I never felt in my marriage.

If anything, sex within marriage served as an overflow valve, an outlet for the passion that mounted inside me, fed by sources kept hidden from my wife. We never talked about this, yet I am sure she sensed it. I think she began to view herself as a sex object—not in the feminist sense of being the object of a husband's selfish greed, but in the deprived sense of being only the object of my physical necessity and not of romance and passion.

Yet the sexual schizophrenia pales in comparison to the schizophrenia of my spiritual life. Can you imagine the inner rupture when I would lead a spiritual retreat for a weekend, winning sighs of admiration and tears of commitment from my devoted listeners, only to return to my room and pore over the latest copy of Oui? I could never reconcile it, but somehow I could not avoid it. If you pinned me down on what degree my succumbing to temptation was a conscious choice, I would probably search for an enigmatic response such as the one a Faulkner character gave when asked about original sin. "Well, it's like this," he said. "I ain't got to but I can't help it."

Paradoxically, I seemed most vulnerable to temptation when speaking or otherwise performing some spiritual service. Those who see Satan as personally manipulating all such temptation to sin would not be surprised by that observation.

Lust became the one corner of my life that God could not enter. I welcomed him into the area of personal finance, which he revolutionized as I awakened to world needs. He cleaned up many of my personal relationships. He gave stirrings of life to the devotional area and my sense of personal communion with him. But lust was sealed off, a forbidden room. How can I reconcile that statement with my earlier protestations that I often cried out for deliverance? I do not know. I felt both sensations: an overwhelming desire to be cleansed and an overwhelming desire to cling to the exotic pleasures of lust. A magnet is attracted equally to two opposite forces. No matter how small you cut a magnet or rearrange it, the two ends will still be attracted to opposite forces. One force never cancels out the other one. This must be what Paul meant in some of those strange statements in Romans 7 (a passage that gave me some comfort). But where was Romans 8 in my life?

Even when I had lust under control, when I successfully limited it to brief, orderly perusals through Playboy at the local newsstand, I still felt this sense of retaining a secret corner God could not enter. Often I would get bogged down in sermon preparation. For motivation to keep going, I would promise myself a trip to the newsstand if I could finish the sermon in an hour and a half. Can you sense the schizophrenia?

Just as I can remember graphically the precise incident in Rochester when adult lust moved in, I can remember the first flutterings of a commitment to healing. They also came on a trip out of town, when I was speaking at a spiritual life conference. The conference was scheduled for a resort hotel in the White Mountains of New Hampshire, near my favorite part of the country. Nothing affects me like the long drive up the rocky coastline of Maine. It is an invigorating, almost religious experience. Some people find deserts affect them like that, some wheat fields, and some mountains. For me, the magnificence of creation unwinds with each curve on the road up Maine's coast. I made plans to fly into Boston, rent a car, and spend three days cruising the coast just to refresh myself before the conference.

My mistake was spending the first night in Boston. I was then practicing a fairly rigid regimen of "controlled lust." I hadn't given in to any scary splurges like my Washington, D.C., encounter in some time. But sure enough, that night I found myself stalking the streets of the seedy areas looking for lust. I did not have to look far. Like many cities, Boston offers strip shows, porno movies—a veritable menu of lust. I usually avoided porno movies because they had proved so unsatisfying. But, Boston also features live nude girls on a revolving platform that you can watch for twenty-five cents. I went in one of those booths.

The mechanics are simple. Twenty curtained booths encircle a revolving platform. Each booth has a glass window covered by a piece of plywood. When you insert a quarter, a mechanical arm somewhat like a toll gate lowers the piece of plywood and lets you see the nude girls revolving on the platform. Then, about three minutes later the toll gate goes up, and you have to drop in another quarter to continue. This is lust at its most unadorned.

The girls employed by such places are not beautiful. Imagine for yourself what kind of women would willingly settle for such employment. You lie under bright lights, revolving like a piece of roast beef at a buffet table, masturbating occasionally to keep the quarters clinking. Around you, leering, furtive stares of men appear for three minutes, then disappear, then appear again, their glasses reflecting your pale shape, none of them looking at your face.

Maybe such booths do serve a redeeming purpose for society—by exposing lust in its basest demythologized form. There is no art or beauty, no acrobatic dancing. The woman is obviously a sex object and nothing else. The men are isolated, caged voyeurs. There is no relationship, no teasing.

The girls are bored stiff: over the whir of the timing mechanism you can hear them trading talk about grocery prices or car repairs. They masturbate as a routine for the customers, like an ape at the zoo who learns to make faces because the onlookers then laugh and point. This is what the richest, freest society in history spends its wealth and freedom on?

And yet, there I was, a respected member of that society, three days away from leading a spiritual-life retreat, dropping in quarters like a frantic long-distance caller at a pay phone.

For fifty cents you could go to a private booth, and one of the girls would entertain you personally. A glass wall still separated you from the girl, but you could, if you wished, pick up the receiver and talk to the girl. Maybe you could talk her into doing something special for you. I went into the booth, but something restrained me from picking up the telephone. I could not make that human an act—it would expose me for what I was. I merely stood, silent, and stared.

Guilt and shame washed over me in waves that night, as usual. Again I had a stark picture of how low I was groveling. Did this animal lust have any relation to the romance that had inspired the Symphonie Fantastique, Elizabeth Barrett Browning's Sonnets, and the Song of Solomon? Certainly each of those works contained traces of glandular desire, but this that I had experienced was devoid of all beauty. It was too naked, and shameful.

I had felt all that remorse before. What shocked me more was my trip up the coast the next two days. I followed my usual practice of staying in homey inns with big fireplaces, and of eating by the waterfront and watching the sailboats bob in the shimmering sea, of taking long solitary walks on the rocky promontories where huge waves crashed with thunder, of closing my eyes and letting salt spray splash across my face, of stopping at roadside stands for fresh lobster and crab. There was a difference this time: I felt no pleasure. None. My emotional reaction was the same as if I had been at home, yawning, reading the newspaper. All romance had drained out, desiccated.

The realization disturbed me profoundly. By all counts, those wonderful, sensuous experiences rated far higher than the cheap thrill of watching a fat, pock—marked body rotate on plywood. And yet, to my utter disbelief my mind kept roaming back to that grimy booth in Boston. Was I going crazy? Would I lose every worthwhile sensation in life? Was my soul leaking away? Was I becoming possessed?

I limped through the conference, and everyone warmly applauded each talk. They were all blessed. Alone in my room at night, I did not pore over pornography. I pored over what had been happening inside me for ten years. I did not like it.

Exactly three days later, I spent the night with a very dear friend, a pastor of one of the largest churches in the South. I had never shared intimate details of my lust life with anyone before, but the schizophrenia was building to such a point I felt I must. He listened quietly, with compassion and great sensitivity as I recounted a few incidents, skipping over those that showed me in the worst light, and described some of my fears to him.

He sat for a long time with sad eyes after I had finished speaking. We both watched our freshly refilled cups of coffee steam, then stop steaming, then grow cold. I waited for his words of advice or comfort or healing or something. I needed a priest at that moment, someone to say, "Your sins are forgiven."

But my friend was no priest. He did something I never expected. His lip quivered at first, the skin on his face began twitching, and finally he started sobbing—great, huge, wretched sobs such as I had seen only at funerals.

In a few moments, when he had recovered some semblance of self-control, I learned the truth. My friend was not sobbing for me; he was sobbing for himself. He began to tell me of his own expedition into lust. He had been where I was—five years before. Since that time, he had taken lust to its logical consequences. I will not dwell on sordid details, but my friend had tried it all: bondage, prostitution, bisexualism, orgies. He reached inside his vest pocket and pulled out a pad of paper showing the prescriptions he took to fight the venereal disease and anal infections he had picked up along the way. He carries the pad with him on trips, he explained, to buy the drugs in cities where he is anonymous.

I saw my friend dozens of times after that and learned every horrific detail of his hellish life. I worried about cognitive dissonance; he brooded on suicide. I read about deviance; he performed it. I winced at subtle fissures in my marriage; he was in divorce litigation.

I could not sit in judgment of this man, because he had simply ended up where my own obsession would likely take me. Jesus brought together lust and adultery, hatred and murder, in the Sermon on the Mount, not to devalue adultery and murder but rather to point to the awesome truth about hatred and lust. There is a connection.

If I had learned about my friend's journey to debauchery in an article like this one, I doubtless would have clucked my tongue, questioned Leadership's judgment in printing it, and rejected the author as an insincere poseur in the faith. But I knew this man, I thought, as well as I knew anyone. His insights, compassion, and love were all more mature than mine. My sermons were like freshman practice runs compared to his. He was a godly man if I had ever met one, but underneath all that … my inner fear jumped uncontrollably. I sensed the power of evil.

For some weeks I lived under a cloud that combined the feelings of doom and terror. Had I crossed some invisible line so that my soul was stained forever? Would I too, like my trusted friend, march inexorably toward the systematic destruction of my body and my soul? He had cried for forgiveness, and deliverance, and every other prayer he had learned in church, and yet now he had fallen into an abyss. Already lawyers were dividing up his house and possessions and his children. Was there no escape for him—for me?

My wife could sense the inner tension, but in fifteen years of marriage she had learned not to force a premature explanation. I had not learned to share tension while it was occurring, only afterward, when it fit into a logical sequence, with some sort of resolution. This time, I wondered whether this particular problem would ever have such a resolution.

A month after my conversation with my friend, I began reading a brief and simple book of memoirs, What I Believe, by Francois Mauriac. In it, he sums up why he clung to the Roman Catholic church and the Christian faith in a country (France) and an age when few of his contemporaries seriously considered orthodoxy. I had read only one novel by the Nobel prizewinning author, Viper's Tangle, but that novel clearly showed that Mauriac fully understood the lust I had experienced, and more. A great artist, he had captured the depths of human depravity. I would not get pious answers from him.

Mauriac's book includes one chapter on purity. He describes the power of sexuality—"the sexual act has no resemblance to any other act: its demands are frenzied and participate in infinity. It is a tidal wave"—and his struggles with it throughout a strict Catholic upbringing. He also discounts common evangelical perspectives on lust and sex. The experience of lust and immorality, he admits, is fully pleasurable and desirable; it is no good trying to pretend that sin contains distasteful seeds that inevitably grow into repulsion. Sin has its own compelling rewards. Even marriage, Christian marriage, he claims, does not remedy lust. If anything, marriage complicates the problem by introducing a new set of difficulties. Lust continues to seek the attraction of unknown creatures and the taste for adventure and chance meetings.

After brazenly denying the most common reasons I have heard against succumbing to a life filled with lust, Mauriac concludes that there is only one reason to seek purity. It is the reason Christ proposed in the Beatitudes: "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God." Purity, says Mauriac, is the condition for a higher love—for a possession superior to all possessions: God himself.

Mauriac goes on to describe how most of our arguments for purity are negative arguments: Be pure, or you will feel guilty, or your marriage will fail, or you will be punished. But the Beatitudes clearly indicate a positive argument that fits neatly with the Bible's pattern in describing sins. Sins are not a list of petty irritations drawn up for the sake of a jealous God. They are, rather, a description of the impediments to spiritual growth. We are the ones who suffer if we sin, by forfeiting the development of character and Christlikeness that would have resulted if we had not sinned.

The thought hit me like a bell rung in a dark, silent hall. So far, none of the scary, negative arguments against lust had succeeded in keeping me from it. Fear and guilt simply did not give me resolve; they added self-hatred to my problems. But here was a description of what I was missing by continuing to harbor lust: I was limiting my own intimacy with God. The love he offers is so transcendent and possessing that it requires our faculties to be purified and cleansed before we can possibly contain it. Could he, in fact, substitute another thirst and another hunger for the one I had never filled? Would Living Water somehow quench lust? That was the gamble of faith. Perhaps Mauriac's point seems obvious and predictable to people who respond to anguished problems with spiritual-sounding cliches. But I knew Mauriac and his life well enough to know that his observation was the culmination of a lifetime of struggle. He had come to that conclusion as the only possible justification for abstemiousness. Perhaps, just perhaps, the discipline and commitment involved in somehow allowing God to purge out the impurities formed the sine qua non, the essential first step toward a relationship with God I had never known.

The combination of grave fear struck in me by my pastor friend's grievous story and the glimmer of hope that a quest for purity could somehow transform the hunger I had lived with unabated for a decade prepared me to try once again to approach God in confession and in faith. I knew pain would come. Could God this time give me assurance that, in Pascal's words, pain was the "loving and legitimate violence" necessary to procure my liberty?

I cannot tell you why a prayer that has been prayed for ten years is answered on the 1,000th request when God has met the first 999 with silence. I cannot tell you why I had to endure ten years of near—possession before being ready for deliverance. And, most sadly of all, I cannot tell you why my pastor friend has, since our conversation after New Hampshire, gone into an unbelievable skid toward destruction. His marriage is now destroyed. He may go insane or commit suicide before this article is published. Why? I do not know.

But what I can tell you, especially those of you who have hung on every turn of my own pilgrimage because it so closely corresponds to yours, is that God did come through for me. The phrase may sound heretical, but to me, after so many years of failure, it felt as if he had suddenly decided to be there after a long absence. I prayed, hiding nothing (hide from God?), and he heard me.

There was one painful but necessary step of repentance. Repentance, says C. S. Lewis, "is not something God demands of you before He will take you back and which He could let you off if He chose; it is simply a description of what going back is like." Going back for me had to include a very long talk with my wife, who had suffered in silence and often in nescience for a decade. It was she I had wronged and sinned against, as well as God. Perhaps my impurity had kept our own love from growing in the same way it had blocked the love I could experience with God. We lay side by side on our bed one steamy summer evening. I talked about nothing, in a nervous, halting voice, for an hour or so, trying to break the barrier that held me back, and finally about midnight I began.

I told her nearly everything, knowing I was laying on her a burden she might not be able to carry. I have wondered why God let me struggle for a decade before deliverance: maybe I will one day find out my wife required just that much time to mature and prepare for the one talk we had that night. Far smaller things had fractured our marriage for months. Somehow, she incarnated the grace of God for me.

I hurt her—only she could tell how much I hurt her. It was not adultery—there was no other woman for her to beam her resentment toward, but perhaps that made it even harder for her. For ten years she had watched an invisible fog steal inside me, make me act strange, pull me away from her. Now she heard what she had often suspected, and to her it must have sounded like rejection: You were not enough for me sexually, I had to go elsewhere.

But still, in spite of that pain and the vortex of emotions that must have swirled around inside her, she gave to me forgiveness and love. She took on my enemy as her enemy too. She took on my thirst for purity as her thirst too. She loved me, and as I type this even now, tears streak my face because that love, that awesome love is so incomprehensible to me, and so undeserved. But it was there.

How can I give you up, O Ephraim! How can I hand you over, O Israel! … For I am God and not man, The Holy One in your midst. Hosea 11:8-9 Saint Augustine, who wrote so eloquently of his own war within, describes our condition here on earth as a simultaneous citizenship in two cities, the city of man and the City of God. The lure of the city of man often drowns out the call of the City of God. Man's city is visible, substantial, real; as such, it is far more alluring. God's city is ephemeral, invisible, cloaked in doubt, far away. It may not even exist— no one knows for sure.

Cheryl Tiegs coming toward me out of the page, her teeth flashing, her eyes sparkling, her body glistening, is that city of man. She, and what she represents, fits well with my body and the hormones that surge inside it and the complexes that grew in my repressed childhood and whatever else contributed to my obsession with lust. The pure in heart shall see God. Set against luscious Cheryl, sometimes that promise does not seem like much. But that is the lie of the Deceiver, and the dyslexia of reality we are asked to overcome. The City of God is the real, the substantial, the whole. What I become as I strengthen my citizenship in that kingdom is far more worthy than anything I could become if all my fantasies were somehow fulfilled.

A year has passed since the late-night talk with my wife. During that time, a miracle has occurred. The war within me has fallen away. Only a few snipers remain. Once I failed, just a month later, when I was walking the streets of San Francisco. I felt myself pulled—it felt exactly like that—into another of the twenty-five cent peep shows to watch an undulating girl on a revolving table for three minutes. Not ten seconds had passed when I felt a sense of horror. My head was pounding. Evil was taking over. I had to get out of there, immediately.

I ran, literally ran, as fast as I could out of the North Beach district. I felt safe only when I got out of there. It struck me then how much had changed: previously I had felt safe when I had given in to lust, because the war inside died down for a moment, but now I felt safe away from the temptation. I prayed for strength and walked away.

Other than that encounter, I have been free of the compulsion. Of course, I notice girls in short dresses and halter tops—why else would they wear them?—but the terror is gone. The gravitational force has disappeared when I pass in front of newsstands. For twelve months I have walked by them and not picked up a magazine. I have not entered a porno theater.

I feel a sense of loss, yes. I enjoyed the beautiful women, both the art and the lust of it. It was pleasurable; I cannot deny that. But now I have gained a kind of inner gyroscope that is balanced correctly and alerts me when I am straying off course. After ten years I finally have a reservoir of strength to draw on as well as a conscience. I have found it necessary to keep open and honest communication with God and my wife on every little temptation toward lust.

The war within still exists. Now it is a war against the notion that biology is destiny. Looking at humanity as a species, scientists conclude that the fittest must survive, that qualities such as beauty, intelligence, strength, and skill are worthy factors by which to judge the usefulness of people, that lust is an innate adaptation to assure the propagation of the species Charity, compassion, love, and restraint fly in the face of that kind of materialist philosophy. Sometimes they defy even our own bodies. The City of God can seem like a mirage; my battle is to allow God to convince me of its reality.

Two totally new experiences have happened to me that, I must admit, offset by far my sense of loss at the experiences of lust I miss.

First, I have learned that Mauriac was right. God has kept his part of the bargain. In a way I had never known before, I have come to see God. At times (not so often, maybe once every couple of months), I have had an experience with God that has stunned me with its depth and intimacy, an experience of an order I did not even know existed before. Some of these moments have come during prayer and Bible reading, some during deep conversations with other people, and one, the most memorable of all because of my occupation, while I was speaking at a Christian conference. At such moments I have felt possessed, but this time joyfully so (demonic possession is a poor parody of the filling of the Spirit). They have left me shaken and humbled, renewed and cleansed. I had not known that level of mystical experience, had not, in fact, even sought it except in the general way of seeking purity. God has revealed himself to me. The City of God is taking on bricks and mortar.

And another thing has happened, again something I did not even ask God for. The passion is coming back into my marriage. My wife is again becoming an object of romance. Her body, no one else's, is gradually gaining the gravitational pull that used to be scattered in the universe of sexes. The act of sex, as often a source of irritation and trauma for me as an experience of pleasure, is beginning to take on the form of mystery and transcendence and inexpressible delight that its original design must have called for.

These two events occurring in such short sequence have shown me why the mystics, including biblical writers, tend to employ the experience of sexual intimacy as a metaphor of spiritual ecstasy. Sometimes, lingering remnants of grace in the city of man bear a striking resemblance to what awaits us in the City of God.

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wisdomfish · 6 years

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For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God. 2 Corinthians 5:21

It’s easy to lose heart. There are the difficulties of life in the body, the feeling that what you do may not have any lasting significance or value, the harsh judgments other people may make about you, the disappointments that come in the plan you had for your life, the frustrations you may have with what you are in the flesh, and the sheer weight of evil in this lost and rebellious world.

What has been so striking to me in this series is to see again how directly God speaks to the real issues of our lives. Thinking about these things has impressed on me again that these are exactly the things that cause us to lose heart! We have seen in this series how God speaks to each of them in this marvelous chapter of his Word.

Today, we come to a way of losing heart that is familiar to every person who really wants to live a godly life. If the Holy Spirit lives in you, if you have come to love God, if you have a genuine desire that God has planted in you to live a holy and godly life, you will often find that your own sins cause you to lose heart.

Awareness of Sin Is Heightened in Godly People

You might expect that people who are far from God would have a heightened awareness of their own sin, but exactly the opposite is true. It is those who are pursuing a godly life who have a heightened awareness of their own sin. Here are three reasons why:

1. The work of the Holy Spirit

He will convict the world concerning sin (John 16:8).

The Holy Spirit convinces of sin. He comes into our lives like a great light. Dirt shows up when the light is turned on. If you go into a dark theater, it’s hard to tell whether or not the place is clean. But when you turn on a bright light, things that were hidden in the dark can be seen clearly.

The work of the Holy Spirit is to shine the light into dark corners of your life, and this is evidence of the work of God. His work is never ultimately to condemn us, but to shine the light on Jesus the Lamb of God who takes away our sin.

The Spirit of truth will bring you back to the great truth of what Jesus accomplished on the cross. That is why it is so important that what we are looking at today gets fixed in our minds and settled in our hearts.

2. The strategy of the enemy

The accuser of our brothers(Rev. 12:10).

Satan is the accuser of Christian brothers and sisters. He works against the Christian by bringing to mind your sins and failures in an attempt to make you lose heart. This is a strategy that Satan only uses with believers. It would be completely against his interest to do this with anyone else.

His main strategy with sinners is to keep them in the dark about their own sin, and keep them in denial, to make them think that their sin is no issue now, or for eternity. But when a person is in Christ, the enemy brings accusation to the mind and heart of that person.

One way that he does this is to raise the memory of past sins. You will say, “That was a long time ago,” but back it will come into your mind, and you need to know how to deal with the accusations of your enemy, and how to get your heart at rest again in the presence of God so that you do not lose heart.

3. The godly impulse of the new heart

Whenever our heart condemns us (1 John 3:20).

John writes to Christian believers and he says, “Whenever our heart condemns us.”

He does not say, “if ever,” as if it would only be an occasional and unlikely thing. He says, “whenever” and here’s the reason why: A Christian has a new heart.

The new heart has a godly impulse. It is sensitive to sin, hates its presence, discerns its subtlety, and longs for the day when it will be gone completely. Christian, your own heart will condemn you, and you need to know how to answer your own heart.

The person who is far from God usually has very little awareness of sin. He thinks of himself as a good person, and he would find it difficult to name any sins that are actually his. He wonders why we would have a sermon about sin. He isn’t concerned about sin, and Satan never accuses him, because he wants him to remain asleep to those realities.

If a sense of your own sins is not an issue in your life, you may be farther from God than you think, and you should be concerned about the state of your own soul.

So I speak today to every person who wants to live a godly life, knowing that this is an issue for you. You are sensitive to your own sins. You say to yourself, “Here I am a Christian. How can it be that these thoughts are in me? Why have I not made more progress? Why did I speak with that sharp tongue? Why am I so reluctant to pray, when I have been a Christian all these years, and I know how important this is?” And sometimes you lose heart.

Look with me at these marvelous words in 2 Corinthians 5:21 For our sake he [God the Father] made him [God the Son] to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

One writer, Philip Hughes, says of these words, “There is no sentence more profound in the whole of Scripture.” [1] This verse is the epicenter of what God has done for us in Jesus Christ. You should know, underline, memorize, and take it into your life.

We saw last week that God has removed every barrier to reconciliation with men and women on his side, “In Christ God was reconciling the world to himself” (2 Cor. 5:19). This is what God was doing at the cross. But how did he do it? What happened at the cross to bring about this great reconciliation? “He made him who knew no sin to be sin, so that

in him we might become the righteousness of God” (2 Cor. 5:21).

Why Jesus Is Uniquely Qualified to Deal with Our Sins For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin (2 Cor. 5:21).

1. He was holy

Christ knew no sin – he was holy. This was affirmed by the angels, by the devils, and by God the Father.

The words of the angel

When the angel came to Mary, the mother of Jesus, he said, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be called holy – the Son of God” (Luke 1:35).

The words of the devils

When Jesus came into a synagogue in Capernaum, a man with an unclean spirit said to him, “What have you to do with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are – the Holy One of God” (Mark 1:24).

Jesus is the only man who ever lived of whom it could be said that he is God. Jesus is the only man who ever lived of whom it could be said that he is holy.

The Lord Jesus Christ was holy in his conception, holy in his nature, holy in his life, and holy in his death. He is confessed forever in heaven, and even in hell, and among his own people on earth as forever the Holy One of God.

The words of the Father

At Jesus’ baptism a voice from heaven said, “This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased” (Mat. 3:17; 17:5). Jesus is the only person who ever lived of whom God could categorically say this.

2. He was without sin

It is the unanimous witness of the New Testament that Christ was without sin. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been temped as we are, yet without sin (Heb. 4:15).

He committed no sin, neither was deceit found in his mouth (1 Pet. 2:22).

You know that he appeared to take away sins, and in him there is no sin (1 John 3:5).

Here’s why this matters: Only a person without sin of their own could be in a position to deal with the sins of others. If it were possible for one person to bear the guilt and the sins of others, it would take a person who was holy through and through, in himself, to do it.

Here is the unique glory of our Lord Jesus Christ: In all of human history there has never been another person of whom it could be said, “He is God, he is man, and he is holy.” As God, he is able to reconcile us to the Father, and as man, he is able to stand with us and act for us, by laying his life down as a sacrifice.

Jesus is uniquely qualified to deal with our sins. Nobody else is in a position even to attempt what Christ has done. That is why the apostle Peter says, “You were ransomed… with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot” (1 Pet. 1:18-19).

How God Deals with People Who Reconcile to Him in Jesus

For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God (2 Cor. 5:21).

What we have in this verse is a description of what God does for any person who is “in him” or who is in Christ. “In Christ God was reconciling the world to himself” (2 Cor. 5:19). Now he stands before us with open arms, appealing to us, “Be reconciled to God!”

1. God does not count your sins against you

In Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them (2 Cor. 5:19).

The reason that a Christian is reconciled to God and has peace with him is not that he or she is without sin. The reason is rather that “in Christ” God does not count our sins against us.

Charles Hodge makes this striking statement about Christians: “Considered in ourselves, [we] are just as undeserving and hell-deserving as ever. This act of justification is to us an act of infinite grace.” [2]

He is not denying that there is change, growth, and progress in the Christian believer. Of course there is. But if any Christian believer was taken out of Christ and left to stand on our own two feet before God, on the basis of our progress in the Christian life, even the best of us would be lost forever – just as if we’d never made any attempt at living the Christian life.

Christian, you will arrive at heaven still a sinner in the process of recovery, and the reason you will enter in is not because of your progress, but because you are in Christ, and in Christ, God does not count your sins against you.

So what happened to these sins that he doesn’t count against you? Where do they go, that they are not counted against you?

2. God counts your sin dealt with in Christ

For our sake he made him to be sin (2 Cor. 5:21).

Jesus was made sin for us on the cross. This is surely one of the most amazing statements in the entire Bible. Christ is holy in himself, the spotless Lamb of God, and our sins were laid on him.

When I first became a pastor, I bought a little black book, because my pastor had a little black book that he used to bring with him into the pulpit when he preached. I thought I should be like him, but I don’t use that little black book anymore.

I remember my pastor holding his little black book in one hand and saying, “Now, all your sins are laid on you. And when Jesus went to the cross, if you are in Christ, your sins were laid on him.” And he would set the little black book on his other hand.

Horatius Bonar said, “God dealt with him as if he were really a sinner, such as we are.

He treated him as if all iniquity was centered in Him. The Lord laid on Him the iniquity of us all. He was clothed with our guilt. He bore the burden of our iniquities… In all respects the Father dealt with Him as guilty of our transgressions.” [3]

Brother, sister, when you think about your sins remember this, by almighty God your sins were laid on him, your Savior. I love the verse that says, “If we confess our sins he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins” (1 John 1:9). Why does it say that God is “just” to forgive our sins? Why doesn’t it say something like, “He is faithful and kind to forgive our sins”?

Because our peace with God, which is a free gift of grace, is founded on justice. God has not reconciled you to himself by sweeping your sins under the carpet, so that one day, if the carpet is lifted, they might all be stirred up again.

No. God has dealt with our sins in Christ! They were laid on him, the spotless Lamb of God was made sin for us. He died in our place. He became the sacrifice for us. Our sins were dealt with on the cross. God made him who knew no sin to be sin! And he did it for our sake!

Friends, if Jesus did not bear our sins, then each of us must carry our own sins forever. One or the other are true for every one of us. If our sins are not on him, they are still on us. But if our sins are on Jesus, they are not on us, and cannot ever be on us. They cannot bounce back on us, because they were absorbed and dealt with on the cross.

My sin, O the bliss of this glorious thought

My sin, not in part but the whole,

Is nailed to the cross and I bear it no more

Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul. [4]

God laid your sins on Jesus and he dealt with them in Jesus. On the cross, Jesus bore all of your sins, and all of the consequences they could ever bring. The righteous judgment that would have been yours fell on him. He absorbed it and he exhausted it. The flaming sword was broken on him, as far as you are concerned, so that you should be reconciled to God.

How could any sins ever be charged against you when all of your sins have been charged against Jesus? Put these two things together: God does not count your sins against you.

God counts your sin dealt with in Christ. And there’s more…

3. God counts Christ’s righteousness as yours

He made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God (2 Cor. 5:21).

Try to take this in because it will be the center of our worship in heaven forever and ever. In himself, Jesus was the sinless Son of God. But our sins were laid on him, and God dealt with him as if he was sin itself. In ourselves, we are sinners, but God’s righteousness has be draped on us, and God deals with us as if we were righteousness itself.

God dealt with Christ as he deals with sin, even though Christ is holy. God deals with us as he deals with righteousness, even though we are sinners. In Jesus, we become the righteousness of God. I love this phrase – “the righteousness of God.”

Paul speaks about this in Philippians. He says that he wants to be found in Christ, “not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith” (Phil. 3:9).

Why faith? Because faith is what unites us to Christ. Faith is what causes us to be “in” Christ. All of these things can become true in Jesus Christ.

The question is not, “How much progress have you made in the Christian life?” The question is: “Are you believing in Jesus?” If a person says, “I would know that I had peace with God if I were more holy, or if I prayed more, or if I was had made more progress,” they are seeking to be found, not in him, but in their own prayer, in their own holiness, or in their own progress.

Paul says, “That is exactly what I don’t want to do! I want to be found in Christ not have a righteousness of my own… but that which comes through faith in Christ” (Phil. 3:9).

So, thank God that he does not deal with you on the basis of what you are in yourself or even at your best! He sees you in Christ, in whom your sins are dealt with, and in whose perfect righteousness you now stand before God. So do not lose heart!

If You Really Believe This,

What Difference Will It Make to Your Life?

1. People who believe this truth will love Jesus Christ

Bonar says: “God looks on us in Him, blesses us in Him, loves us in Him, and will glorify and reward us in Him. We are complete in Him. It is our connection with Him through believing that gives us this completeness in the Father’s eyes. To the end of our earthly course we are incomplete in ourselves; yet from the moment we believed we became complete in Him.” [5]

If you believe this, you will quickly come to the conclusion that all you have is in Jesus Christ. You will say that no sacrifice is too great for him who became sin for you.

2. People who believe this truth will take sin seriously

How can you do any other when you love Jesus? Look what sin did to him! When you see what happened on that cross, and when you see how much God hates it, and what it cost your Savior to deal with it, there will be a new energy in your life to be done with it.

If you come to believe this, it will energize your responsiveness to the Holy Spirit. When he shows you your sin, you will find yourself saying, “I cannot live with this any longer.”

Do you have an awareness of sin in your life? Do you have a sense of how far you are from what God calls you to be? How can the Holy Spirit be present in your life if you have no awareness of sin, and no interest in turning from it? Why are you calling yourself a Christian if you are content to continue in sin? Why would you think that you are heading to heaven if these things don’t matter to you?

3. People who believe this truth reconcile to God

In Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.

Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.

For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God (2 Cor. 5:19-21).

When God has done all this, why would you walk away? His arms are stretched out. What kind of folly is it for you to push him away? Wouldn’t you want this to be true of you today?

Permissions: You have permission and are encouraged to reproduce and distribute this material in any format you choose, as long as you do not alter or change the wording in any way and do not charge a fee (beyond the cost of reproducing these materials). For posting on the web, a link to this document on our website (www.UnlockingtheBible.org) is preferred. Any exceptions to the above must be approved by Unlocking the Bible, 1-866-865-6253.

Please include this statement on every copy distributed:

By Colin S. Smith. © Colin S. Smith. Website: UnlockingtheBible.org

[1] Philip Hughes (New International Commentary, 2 Corinthians; Eerdman’s: 1962) p. 211.

[2] Charles Hodge (Commentary on the Second Epistle to the Corinthians; Eerdman’s: 1950) p. 151

[3] Horatius Bonar, (Kelso Tracts; No. 26, Righteous Reconciliation, U of Mich: 2009) p. 3.

[4] Philip Bliss (It Is Well with My Soul, from the hymn) 1876

[5] Horatius Bonar, (Kelso Tracts; No. 26, Righteous Reconciliation, U of Mich: 2009) p. 4.

#2 corinthians 5 #colin smith #christianity #heart of the gospel #gospel

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emilywatchescursedshow · 3 years

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Recap of eps watched while grading a midterm

Wow I watched a lot more of the season than I thought I did.

S2 E12 - Nightshifter

Dean and Sam pursue a shapeshifter who has taken to robbing banks, but there plan goes awry when the man Sam earlier dismissed as being crazy decides to take the bank hostage himself. It’s a pretty interesting choice to imply that Sam being so dismissive of the tin-hatter that it drives him to such desperation, and paired with Dean obviously feeling sorry for him and trying to walk back Sam’s dismissal later on (too late) we get more to the theme of Sam being stuck up and Dean having more compassion.

This episode rips off a lot of dialogue from Jose Chung’s: From Outer Space, including the term “mandroid” which is used to describe Mulder to hilarious effect. The tin-hatter seems to parallel a character from that episode as well. Jose Chung is a great episode, and also Dean is very hot in this episode, so I’ll allow it.

S2 E13 - Houses of the Holy

People get visions from a dead priest, who they believe to be an angel, to kill parishioners the priest knows are evil. We learn that Dean doesn’t believe in angels and that Sam prays every day, which, like, why. I’m very much on Dean’s side about that, but I also think from a writing standpoint it might be in the show’s interests to have one of the brothers be a good and devout Christian, I guess.

Sam gets a vision, we have another scene of a lady getting assaulted in a car, and Dean saves her while also maybe starting to believe in the will of god. I’ve said before that Castiel was but a glimmer in the writers’ eyes, but this is the first episode where we toy with the concept of angels, which is pretty interesting.

S2 E14 - Born Under a Bad Sign

Sam gets possessed by a demon and starts killing hunters. He attacks Jo, which I don’t love. We learn that Jo is in love with Dean but that (as I sort of suspected) Dean sees her as being too young for him, which, like, yeah, she is a bit young for Dean “I’m not into prude chicks” Winchester. Also apparently demon Sam smokes and drinks which is fun, I hope we get more of Jarp acting drunk on-screen.

Anyway Bobby saves the day by burning off the demon’s locking scar or something, the demon gets ousted, the viewer learns that John maybe killed Jo’s father on purpose. Which is a pretty weak reveal in my opinion, but I guess it’s supposed to deepen the rift between the Winchesters and the Harvelles? I don’t know.

Hot bitch killer Sam was fun, I would like more lore about how he got possessed in the first place, but otherwise I thought the episode was fine. Oh, we also got the character thru-line that Dean doesn’t want to lose his family members in that he keeps refusing to kill Sam.

S2 E15 - Tall Tales

This episode is a ripoff of the X-Files episode Bad Blood. It’s shot the same way, with two people exchanging their version of events and jokes made at each others expense. I thought the episode itself was really fun, although it works better when your characters have strong personalities/traits that can be exaggerated, and Sam sort of has none while Dean’s personality trait they’ve been focusing on this season is primarily “scumbag.” The twist at the end that the trickster was alive was pretty lame, in my opinion, but eh, that’s sort of how these stories go sometimes.

S2 E16 - Roadkill

There are ghosts, they haunt a road. The main reveal in this episode is that Dean and Sam don’t know what happens when ghosts move on. I wasn’t paying good enough attention to this episode to get a feeling for whether it was creepy, but I really liked the main supporting actress.

S2 E17 - Heart

Sam gets laid for the first time this season and then has to kill his love interest when it’s clear she’s just a werewolf from now on. I guess having any characters be regulars besides the brothers is sort of not in the cards (I know this is drama in the show the whole time), but it was a little strange to watch the “sexing a werewolf” thing get treated so differently in this show from Buffy. Oz gets locked in a cage and learns to control it eventually, whats-her-name gets put down like a rabid dog. Anyway Sam’s sad about it, which is fair. I guess they allotted one sex scene per season or something and Dean got it last season so now it’s Sam’s turn. I was pretty bored by the episode, watching the wolf-girl be a NLOG to Sam’s attempt to turn awkward into charm was .. uh.. I wasn’t into it.

S2 E18 - Hollywood Babylon

Dean gets a job working in Hollywood. He’s good at it and they serve good food.

This episode was weird because I couldn’t figure out what exactly the writers were trying to say. The villain is a writer who gets upset that the execs weren’t taking his script seriously enough and changed it for “cleavage and fart jokes.” Are we supposed to sympathize with the villain? I don’t think so - I think the audience is meant to deride him. But what does that say about how the writers view their own work? Dean’s obsession with actors who play bit characters and deep respect for an actress who stars in campy horror movies is supposed to be “nerdy,” but at least it’s genuine and it’s a main reason this episode was fun to watch.

The Dean/Sam dynamic is interesting in this episode as well. Dean is trying to take care of Sam and after his second dead girlfriend and his demonic possession, but gets caught up in life as a PA while Sam tries to solve the case. Sam looks down on Dean for his nerdiness and generally seems fed up with the whole scene. At least Dean has fun.

S2 E19 - Folsom Prison Blues

Dean and Sam get arrested on purpose so they can work a case of a spirit killing prisoners. It turns out the spirit was an angel of death - a nurse who kills people. We get Sam asking Dean if he’s worried about how well he fits in to the prison culture/lifestyle and Dean saying “No, not really.” Sam apparently did not want to do this case, which is interesting; although the writers probably thought that was a reasonable attitude (not wanting to be in prison) and that having Sam act this way would add tension, it does encourage the viewer to wonder if Sam things prisoners are not as worth protecting. Dean obviously things they are and says as much in the episode. Combined with the way Sam obviously looks down on Dean at times for not knowing things... we get a character who fits with the “elite academia” stereotype for Sam.

I thought the episode was fine, there was some good Jacting in it, and it was fun to see an episode pretty much driven by Dean again.

S2 E20 - What Is and What Should Never Be

Dean has an evil “It’s a Wonderful Life” moment when a Djinn makes him live in a fantasy world where is mom didn’t die. I’m assuming that the lore is the fantasy is what would have actually happened had Mary not died, as I’m not sure Dean would fantasize himself being such an asshole. Anyway, it was fun to watch Dean get really excited about sandwiches and mowing the lawn.

I think it’s interesting that this season has seen such a theme for Dean of wanting things to be different, and specifically, being tired of hunting. The “It’s a Wonderful Life” message gets hammered home at the end when Sam tells Dean that it’s worth the sacrifice so that other people might live, after Dean admits to almost allowing himself to get trapped by the Djinn. We’ve switched places from the beginning of season 1 completely, with Dean being reluctant and Sam being gung-ho. I did feel as though the episode had an interesting relationship with the “I’m a simple man with simple pleasures” way they’ve been writing Dean this whole season. He’s been pretty rash and willing to let his whims distract himself and Sam from cases, so it’s pretty believable that he would almost let himself get trapped by the Djinn.

All in all, I liked the episode.

#supernatural #supernatural liveblog #this isn't live but oh well #episode recaps

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cachekakusu · 6 years

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K, so ya girl made the trip to see Anastasia on Broadway because WHY THE FUCK NOT also I needed a much needed vacation lmaooo (RIP MY $$$ but I’m here for a good time, not a long time!!! And worth going to see the show alone!) I also saw it twice because I’m so Extra(TM). But anyway, here be a reallllyy looooooong ass flail-y recap and thoughts for prosperity!!! I’m also combining both nights because I can!!!

So the first night, I sat center orchestra so I can IMMERSE MYSELF IN THE SHOW and the second time, I sat mezzanine right and HONESTLY the theatre is so small that as long as you’re not super to the side, you’ll get an amazing view wherever you are.

ACT I

When the EMPRESS WALKS IN, THAT SHIT SPARKLED LIKE A FUCKING THOUSAND DIAMONDS!?!?!? WOW LINDA CHO WAS ROBBED. The audience also gasped audibly during her entrance

People laughed when they took pictures IDK WHY IT’S SO FUNNY KJDSFS

The Attack (as I’m dubbing it) is so intense and visually stunning, especially the end

Also the “In The Dark of the Night” melody playing!!!!

I also loved the Romanov Sisters “AAAAAHHHHHHH” before the run away

Ok MAX AS GLEB!!! I LOVED HIM he really was more awkward and less poised than Ramin was, at least in front of Anya but just as terrifying and intimidating. I thought he was also funnier sdjfhdsjkhf. The tone of voices were pretty similar too so it was kind of easier to focus on his portrayal, which was amazing overall.

Uhhh once Dmitry comes out, you can’t stop looking at him. JAWLINE. And also he gesticulates a lot sjkfskjj.

Christy really forreal literally has a sparkle in her eye whenever she sings and it��s amazing to witness SHE REALLY IS SUCH A SPECIAL PERFORMER

ISTG, one of these days Derek and John are forreal gonna end up flipping Christy over when they lift her THEY ALMOST DID THE SECOND NIGHT AND I WAS STRESSEDT you legit could see her feet up in the air lmfaaooao

After Anya chases off those hooligans, she points the stick at Dmitry and says, “Come at me, I won’t hurt you.” in this playful almost flirty voice and it gave me......thoughts......

DEREK GETS SO SWEATY AT THE END OF MY PETERSBURG AND IT’S SO FUNNY KFHSKJF also he kind of warbled the last note in both nights but I find it kind of endearing lmao bless him

There are a number of moments where Dmitry just kind of stares at Anya and then kind of catches himself and shakes himself out of it and it’s adorable like “hahahahaha idiot you’re falling in loooooooooooooove”

Uhhh OUAD is even more amazing because the ghost projections extend to the sides of the theatre so like SENSORY OVERLOAD I cried metaphorically

Watching the ensemble is so fun, when you can look away from Derek/Christy for a few seconds (WHICH IS HARD TO DO) lmfaoo, and in “We’ll go from There”, when it’s Dmitry’s turn to sing and he’s just hanging on the train rails, I was watching the two smoker girls (one played by Lyrica aka Odette/Ballerina), and at first, they have these disgusted looks that slowly turn into “Oh no, he’s hot” and LYRICA ESPECIALLY had that “gosh, he’s actually really cute” AND IT’S HILARIOUS (and I told Lyrica when I met her at stagedoor and she laughed a lot, saying she and Sarah have a lot of fun doing that scene)

OTP: DMITRY x BATHTUBS FOREVER

Stay, I Pray You gets me on a deep personal level because the immigrant connection is real (”You are all I know. You have raised me.” WHEN WILL I NOT CRY!?!?!?) , also I love numbers where everyone just sings classic choral style also the harmonies at the end PHEW

Also CONSTANTINE’S VOCALS

Journey to the Past. No words tbh other than MAGICAL.

ACT II

PARIS HOLD THE KEY TO YOUR HEART IS SO FUN AND THE ELEVATOR RIDE UP TO THE EIFFEL TOWER IS SO FUCKING FUN!!!

I appreciate Land of Yesterday so much more as a visual performance because Caroline O’Connor is amazing. Her wit and her PHYSICAL STAMINA

MBP is one regal HBIC and Close the Door made me EMO

TCATCM is always such a hoot and John and Caroline are amazing together, the audience really just eats it up

IN A CROWD!!!! OF FUCKING THOUSANDS!!!!

I love arm

Christy’s delivery of “I remember” has gotten much softer it seems, and then they both kind of stare at each other for awhile, as if really realizing who each other is before they CRASH INTO EACH OTHER RIP ME

both gasp lightly between “I’d find you....” “again”

*cue the disappointed sounds of the audience when Dmitry pulls back. SAME, MY DUDES*

also they both let out really audible gasps before Dmitry pulls back and it’s so !!!!!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!?!?!?

When Dmitry kneels down, the background turns into this starry sky AND THE FULL EFFECT OF IT IS BEAUTIFUL AND I WAS AWESTRUCK

I always get so emo when character’s leitmotifs play but ANYWAYS when the Dowager came out, you can tell she just looked so done and tired AND IT BROKE MY HEART (she looked regal af though)

When Dmitry comes RUNNING OUT and just kind of looks around and you know he’s searching for Anya THE silly boy and then Vlad spots him and he’s fixing him up while he acts like a disgruntled son lmflaks

ANYA’S ENTRANCE IN THE ICONIC BLUE DRESS fuck, the sparkles on that dress is so mesmerizing and SHE WAS GLOWING but she only had eyes for Dmitry right when she found him and has this fond look on her face AND SDKJFHSKJ SHE LOVES HIM FLALSMA

(release “When She Walks In”, you cowards!)

I didn’t really cry cuz during both performances (I was TOO HAPPY TO SEE THIS ALL COME TO LIFE BEFORE MY EYES) BUT I did get super emotional when Vlad sang “Meant to Be” becaue HE JUST LOOKED SO HEARTBROKEN FOR BOTH HIS CHILDREN!?!?!?

QUARTET AT THE BALLET is one of my favorites AND I LOSE MY SHIT EVERY TIME!!!! Also LYRICA!!!!! What an amazing dancer and I found it really nice that it was a show within a show and they had their own curtain call for this

Seriously, which of the writers hates Cleveland sdkjfhsdjkfh that joke will never not be funny

DEREK’S CRESCENDO AND DESCRESCENDO IN ETW!! BITCH!!!!

Also, DMITRY BOUGHT ANYA A FUCKING DOLL!?!!? WHY IS HE LIKE THIS!?!?!? Let me stare off into space while I continue to process that information

Uh, when Dmitry checks in on the Dowager and Anya during their reunion, he has a little smile on his face before he angstily walks away (and out of Anya’s life forever!!! Or so he thought, haha that fool)

The Anya/Gleb confrontation is always such a cool and emotional scene, especially when the Romanov ghosts also step back behind

After Gleb decides to let Anya go, and the Romanovs/Officers leave and you see them carry a body, as if physically and metaphorically burying the past IT’S SO. WOW. HAUNTING AND EVOCATIVE AND I THINK ABOUT IT A LOT

When Anya finds Dmitry and he kind of takes her in for a bit before going all emo on her and Anya kind of has this fond smile before getting all sad once he says, “I can’t be in love with someone I can’t have for the rest of my life” like GOD, YOU’RE A FOOL BUT I LOVE YOU!?!?!?

“*softly* I’m not your prince, Anya.”

*cue my tears*

THE KISS!!! SO MUCH CHEERING And lmao whenever Christy grabs his suitcase to step on it, IT’S SO HILARIOUS because even in her heels she’s almost eye level with Derek (a real testament to how big of a height difference they have)

After Dmitry pulls away, they both have dazed smiles on and kind of look at each other for a beat longer RIP ME

EVEN AFTER ANYA TAKES HIS ARM AND THEY KEEP SMILING AT EACH OTHER AND IT’S SOOO!!! CUTE!!! I LOVE ROMANCE!!!

The finale gets me so emo, the Dowager’s “Still...” and her opening the music box AND THE ROMANOV SPIRITS ALL COME OUT AND THEN THEY ALL ROTATE LIKE AN ACTUAL MUSIC BOX!!!! IT’S BEAUTIFUL

Also the bridge in the background changes from being real, to a PAINTING as if to really add to the fairytale effect of DIMYA WALKING TO THEIR FUTURE and then when it goes, “Far away...” IT CHANGES TO A SNOWY SCENE AND I!!! LOSE MY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stage door. K so honestly, I appreciate all of them so much they are all so nice and gracious AND DESERVE ALL THE LOVE AND PRAISE!!!!

Max was so nice (SUPER HANDSOME) and I told him that he was really funny as Max and he laughed skdjskjf

Nicole came out next and she’s adorable, protect her forever!!!!

Lyrica is WOW BEAAUTIFUL TBH and I told her she’s an amazing dancer and she said how she has so much fun doing the ballet (also she has the most legible signature and I respect that lmaoo)

Caroline O’Connor is a delight and is so nice and I told her that I love her jokes and her high kicks skjfhskdjfh and she laughed and she thanked me for buying the program lmfaoo that was cute

Mary Beth also came out and is so elegant and precious and Zach was following after her because he was carrying some box (??? hers??? WHO KNOWS)

I’m lame and exclaimed, “You’re the music box!!!” when it was Zach’s turn to sign and he was all, “How did you know!?!?!? We have an avid fan over here, guys!” sdkjfhskjfh and I honestly would love to see his Dima cuz he’s really witty and a good egg.

I told John that he was the real winner in my heart and he laughed and said how they really enjoy making the vlogs and I jokingly asked when the next season was and he was very ;)))) about it SO THAT’S EXCITING BECAUSE I WANT MORE ROYAL MISFITS FOREVER!!! I also told him he deserved a full pack of gum sjkfhsjk and he said that he doesnt even like gum sjkdfsh

Derek is unreal beautiful and lmao the thirst for him by everyone is real but he’s so nice with everyone. I just told him that his vocals in Quartet are particularly amazing sdfjhsjkfh and he laughed adorably (ok, everything he does is adorable lbr). I was kind of a mess trying to take a pic with him but he was really patient while I got my shit together and flkaoska he’s so tall he had to crouch down quite a bit (sorry for my shortness, my dude). Anyway, both pics turned out slightly blurry because???? He just has that effect, I guess!

Christy went last and lmao, I wonder if they purposely plan it that way now because of how long she takes interacting with each fan. Even the security guard was impressed with how much she loves doing the stage door lmao. She really is as precious as you expect and I pretty much babbled my love for Anastasia and for her AT her because SHE’S EVERYTHING AND IS A LITERAL PRINCESS and emanates so much love and kindness. I asked for a pic and I’m such an awkward ass turtle, trying to decide which way would provide better lighting lmao she offered to do hold the phone instead and I didn’t even realize she was taking so many pics lmao. Then I told her I loved her and thanked her for being THE BEST ANASTASIA A FAN CAN HOPE FOR and we hugged and she thanked me for coming and told me my hair smelled good sdkjfskf. The second night is when I gave her my gift (lmao, it’s supposed to be a giant easter egg that I painted with some candy in it but the top half came off when she was taking it out, hence why she’s only holding half of it in the picture akhad) and she’s honestly like a little kid with how excited she was about it and even held it out so the other peeps could see lolol. She saw the treats inside and I told her how I know she loves snacking and she kind of went on about the pocki sticks she was eating backstage (which she pronounces, “poke-y” lmaoo so I didn’t know what she was talking about til like, a day later) and how they’re so addicing lmao I love one (1) backstage snacker. And she keeps saying how they have the best fans and I’m like, “UH!!! YOU GUYS DESERVE IT, HONESTLY!!!!” and she does the “Awwww!!!” face (y’all know the one). OH she also tried guessing where I was from but I kind of blurted it out before she could and she was so “SEE, I WAS GONNA SAY ‘CALIFORNIA’! I shouldn’t have even asked!” lmao. I gushed at her again, thanked her and probably told her I loved her again before I finally said goodbye lmao.

I’m probably missing a lot of stuff, honestly it’s a blur and I’m trying to finish this up before I pass out from a food coma but ANYWAYS! 20/10 would fucking recommend, I love this musical so goddamn much and the cast and literally every one involved they’re all so talented and it will always hold a special place in my goddamn heart!!! *a million crying emojis*

#personal #anastasia the musical #christy altomare #derek klena #john bolton #zach adkins #lyrica woodruff #max von essen #mary beth peil #nicole scimeca #caroline o'connor #anastasia cast

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dalyunministry · 3 years

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Pastor Johnraj Lamech

🍁

Greetings in the matchless Name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Topic: Obedience Made Easy!

Rhema Word (1): Matthew 11:30 (NIV) “My yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Rhema Word (2): 1 John 5:3-4 (NIV) “In fact, this is love for God: to keep his commands. And his commands are not burdensome, for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith”.

Let’s pray. Our Gracious Loving Father, thank you for giving us an opportunity to meditate your Word today. Thank you, Holy Spirit, for helping us to understand your Words which are living and active. Please help us to live a life as per your Word Lord. Father, we give all the Glory and Honour to you. We pray in the mighty Name of your beloved Son Jesus Christ. Amen.

We may not be regular in talking to God. But the devil never misses a day to talk to us. Invariably his subject of conversation with us is lies about God and His Word. The foremost of his lies is that, “God is a hard taskmaster…His expectations are too demanding to be lived up to…His commandments are too difficult to be obeyed!” Victory in Christian life depends on which one we choose to believe: Devil’s lie OR GOD’S TRUTH”.

Christian life begins with obedience to the Gospel. From beginning to end Christian life is a life of obedience. That’s why unbelievers are called the “children of disobedience” (Eph 5:6). No doubt obedience to God is difficult, but it is not a drudgery. This was made clear in one of the very early discourses of Jesus: ”My yoke is easy and my burden is light.” To this the dear most disciple of Jesus, even John said Amen when he testified at the end of his six decade of Christian life, ”God’s commands are not burdensome” (1 John 5:3 b).

Remember, the first audience of Jesus was mostly of Jews. Religion was a burden for them. The laws of Moses were a heavy yoke. The leaders who taught those laws to the people would not even touch them with their fingers (Matthew 23:4). It was against this background Jesus invited folks to Him with the promise in Matthew 11:28-30 ”Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

This does not mean that Jesus lowered the standard of holiness set by the Father God in the law of Moses. In fact Jesus has raised it. He said that even a lustful look was adultery, and hatred was murder (Matthew 5:21,22,27,28). The difference is that God under the New Covenant has abundantly given to us His grace through Christ that we may be enabled to obey His Commandments as would be acceptable to Him (John 1:16,17). In other words, obedience is now made easy!.

Let us try to understand how obedience is made practical and easy from the Book of Hebrews. Interestingly this 13 chapter book begins with the words, ”God spoke!”. I could pick up from this Epistle atleast following seven factors which make obedience easy. Understanding of each of these factors will surely catapult you to soaring heights to walk in the heavenlies.

1] Faith:

2] Fear:

3] Facts:

4] Fellowship:

5] Forerunners:

6] Failures:

7] Future:

1] Faith:

If we trust someone, it becomes easy for us to do what that person bids us to do. The Book of Hebrews presents Abraham as a classic example of this truth. Hebrews 11:8 says ”By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.” He trusted God as a “friend”. James records this fact in James 2:23 (b) “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,” and he was called God’s friend.”. Jesus came to show us not only the fatherhood of God but also His friendliness. Obedience is such a pleasant and natural thing in homes where parents and children relate to each other as friends!

Jesus during His life on earth was a friend both of sinners and saints. He was nick-named, “friends of sinners”, and He called His disciples His friends. Fellowship is basic to trust and confidence.

God’s commandments come to us through His Word. We cannot obey them unless we believe them. Adam disobeyed God because he disbelieved what God has told him about the tree of knowledge. Unbelief was the root cause of the disobedience of the people of Israel (Hebrews 3:18,19). The Author of Hebrews says in Hebrews 4:2 ”For indeed the gospel was preached to us as well as to them; but the word which they heard did not profit them, not being mixed with faith in those who heard it.”

God is not against common sense or logical reasoning. They are very necessary to make right decisions and sound judgement. But everything should be submitted to the Word of God. Peter was quite frustrated when after a whole night of toiling and moiling in the sea he caught nothing. Jesus was not a fisherman but a carpenter. When He asked Peter to throw the net into deep waters, the latter would not have found it easy to do so. But when he placed his fishing experience under the words of Jesus, obedience became easy for him. He said, ”Nevertheless at Your Word…”(Luke 5:5).

This kind of faith comes by hearing the Word of God again and again. Not just by reading, but by “hearing” – which means that we must realise that it is actually God “speaking” to us whenever we read His Word. Hearing leads to believing, and believing helps obedience (Romans 10:16-17).

Obedience becomes difficult once the heart is hardened by unbelief. The writer of the Epistle to the Hebrews warns us in Hebrews 3:12 ” See to it, brothers and sisters, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God.” When we realise that the one who calls us to obey is a “living God”, we feel like a child relaxing with confidence into the bosom of its mother. No anxiety. No worry.

2] Fear :

Fear is the next powerful force that motivates us to obey. Noah feared God and obeyed Him to build an ark. We read in Hebrews 11:7 ”By faith Noah, when warned about things not yet seen, in holy fear built an ark to save his family. By his faith he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousness that is in keeping with faith.” If he had not obeyed, he would have got destroyed with others in the flood.

Fear has two components, one negative and the other positive. Fear of punishment is negative. Fear for the person is positive. The negative thing is the worry of consequence. The other one is reverence for the person. For God-pleasing obedience both the dimensions are important.

a] Negative Fear:

The first lessons of obedience are usually learnt in the school of negative fear. When God gave Adam His commandment about the tree of knowledge, He warned him, ”In the day when you eat of it you shall surely die!” (Genesis 2:17). Parents show the cane or threaten their children. Teachers warn students that they would fail if they don’t work hard. While counselling youngsters, King Solomon wrote, ”Fear the Lord and depart from evil” (Proverbs 3:7(b)). As a preacher he concluded his sermons with the words in Ecclesiastes 12:13 ”Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God and keep His commandments, for this is man’s all.”

Let us just check why does a nation become corrupt? Why do communities collapse in morals? Why does the world embrace evil? Why is sin tolerated in the Churches? Loss of Fear of God is the underlying reason.

When Abraham went to Gerar, he requested his wife Sarah to tell people that she was his sister. The King of that place was attracted by her beauty and took her to himself. But before he touched her God intervened and warned him that she was someone’s wife. The King was alarmed and asked Abraham why he told this lie. The answer of Abraham was ”Because I thought, surely the FEAR of God is not in this place; and they will kill me on account of my wife!” (Genesis 20:10-11).

Fear of God comes from the knowledge that nothing can be hidden from Him. The Bible says in Hebrews 4:13 ”And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.” It was this knowledge that made Joseph flee from temptation. When his boss’ wife enticed him, her argument perhaps was no one would know because “none of the men of the house was inside” (Gen 39:11-12). She looked “around”, but he looked “above”! He knew that God knew. Joseph has the knowledge that every transgression and disobedience would receive a just penalty (Hebrews 2:2).

b) Positive Fear:

Understanding “who” commands us makes obedience easy. Reverential fear for God stops arguments and rebellion in our mind. See the introduction to the Ten Commandments: ”I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage” (Exodus 20:2). Then follow the commandments, ”Therefore, You shall….You shall not … and so on!”

Not only for the Ten Commandments, but also whenever God gave His people important laws and regulations, He prefaced them with the statement, ”I am the Lord!”

In a very practical situation Peter demonstrated how the knowledge of who commands makes obedience easy. When Jesus was walking on the sea towards His disciples whose boat had been seized by raging waves and contrary wind, they were afraid that it was a ghost! But Jesus cheered them up saying it was He. Immediately Peter responded, ”Lord, it is You, command me to come to You on the water!” (Matthew 14:24-29). Peter knew how risky it was to attempt to walk on water. But he ventured because he knew who called him.

3] Facts:

Often we are told by preachers and people that we must obey God blindly, but God would have us understand WHY we must obey Him. No doubt our obedience must be implicit and immediate, but God is only pleased when it is intelligent too.

In Hebrews 3:7 we read, ”Today, if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts.” The author of the Epistle in the two previous verses states twin reasons for calling for obedience. One was that Moses was faithful in God’s house as a servant, and next, Christ is faithful over His house as a Son. In other words, Moses understood that he was a servant of God and that demanded faithful obedience; and Christ obeyed His Father as a son.

Applying the same principle to us, when we know that God is our Creator, we will obey Him as His creatures. When Christ is our King, we obey Him as His citizens. He is the Captain, so obey Him as His soldiers. He is the Lord and Master, so we obey Him as His disciples. That’s why He once rebuked His disciples, ”Why do you call Me, Lord, Lord, and do not do what I say?” (Luke 6:46). If Christ is the Head, we ought to obey Him as the organs of His body. This is intelligent obedience.

David was a man after God’s own heart, but that does not mean he never disobeyed God. He did have difficulties in obeying God in everything. That’s why he frequently prayed, “O Lord, give me understanding and I shall keep Your law…Give me understanding that I may learn Your commandments…that I may know Your testimonies” (Psalm 119:34,73b, 125). Yes, God does not demand from us blind obedience, but He desires brilliant obedience. Intelligent obedience gives no room for half-heartedness.

Please note, why do horses and donkeys and other animals find it difficult to obey their masters? Because, they have no understanding. That’s why God admonishes us, ”I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go … Do not be like the horse or like the mule, which have NO UNDERSTANDING, which must be harnessed with bit and bridle, or else they will not come near you!” (Psalm 32:8-9).

Where do we get facts from ? How do we get understanding? It’s all from the Word of God. It imparts understanding of eternal facts in our inner man. This function of God’s Word is graphically explained in Hebrews 4:11-12 ”Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will perish by following their example of DISOBEDIENCE. For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”

The message here is that God’s Word gives us clear-cut understanding of divine truth. Plain truth. Just facts. No compromise. Systematic meditation of the Scriptures keeps our spirits soft and submitted to the Rule of God in our lives. Not mere accumulating of knowledge in head but assimilation of divine truth in heart.

4] Fellowship:

Help and support from fellow believers, friends and family folks make obedience to God easy. We are exhorted in Hebrews 3:13-15 ”But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. We have come to share in Christ, if indeed we hold our original conviction firmly to the very end. As has just been said: “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion.”

Please note when we enter eternity, there will be no “today” because there will be no yesterday or tomorrow! A walk of obedience with God is ultimately the individual’s choice and responsibility, but he cannot do it all by himself. Not isolation but integration is the safest road to walk in consistent obedience.

We must not fail to note when exactly God gave Eve to Adam. It was immediately after He commanded Adam about the tree of knowledge (Genesis 2:15-18). God said, ”It’s not good for man to be alone! Not that he would fall into adultery if he were alone. In fact, there was no woman at all at that time! The companionship of Eve was mainly to help Adam to obey God and resist Satan. What an awesome responsibility God has placed on spouses to mutually encourage and exhort one another in their walk of obedience to God! When together they seek to obey God in all matters, relationship between them also becomes smoother. This was the secret of oneness between the old couple Elizabeth and Zacharias (Luke 1:6,59-63).

Children need the help of parents to obey God. King Solomon stresses it in the very beginning of this book of Proverbs. ”My son, hear the instruction of your father, and do not forsake the law of your mother” (Proverbs 1:8; 4:1-4). The influence of mummy and granny is well known (2 Timothy 1:5).

”Leave me alone”, is the demand of youth both at home and outside. This puts the devil in an advantageous position to play havoc in their lives. Let them listen to the words of the wisest king ever lived: ”Two are better than one…Because, if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up… Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him.. Better is a poor and wise youth than an old foolish king who will be admonished no more” (Ecc 4:9,10,13). Was it not because of the strong support of fellowship the three young men namely Hananiah, Azariah and Mishael enjoyed that they could choose to obey God rather than the King of Babylon in the matter of faith? (Daniel 3:28).

5) Forerunners:

Obedience is taught as well as caught. Because the children of disobedience outnumber the children of obedience and we are invariably surrounded by the former, we get easily imbibed with a spirit of disobedience (Eph 2:2). The most effective means to unlearn the ways of disobedience is to learn from those who walked in obedience (Colossians 3:6-8, 1 Timothy 6:11).

Of the clouds of forerunners whom we can emulate to walk in obedience, Jesus is the supreme example (Hebrews 12:1). We are called to closely study Him and watch Him (Hebrews 3:1-2). Apostle Paul points this out in Romans 5:19 in stark contrast to the disobedience of Adam and his race: ”As through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous.”

Yes, the obedience of Jesus was not intermittent but consistent. He was obedient “until death”. His life from beginning to end was characterised by obedience. He obeyed His Father on the banks of River Jordon, in the wilderness of temptation, in the Garden of Gethsemane, on the Mount of Golgotha and everywhere. No spot on earth was desecrated by Him by steps of disobedience. Let this mind of Christ, the willing mind of obedience, be in us also! (Phil 2:5,8). Let us “obey always!” (v 12). It is easy to dismiss the example of Jesus saying that He was God and so He could live like that. But let us not forget that He did so by ”coming in the likeness of men” (v 7c).

The 11th Chapter of Hebrews, which is called God’s Hall of Fame, is filled with portraits of those who excelled in obedience to God in their generations:

Noah obeyed God amidst mockers (Hebrews 1:17)

Abraham obeyed God leaving comforts (v 8)

Joseph obeyed God against allurements (v 22)

Moses obeyed God against affluence (v 24)

Daniel obeyed God against threats. The disciples obeyed God amidst persecutions. Let us be always inspired by these forerunners. Most of them lived in times when the benefits of Calvary or the blessings of Pentecost were unknown. If they could walk in God-pleasing obedience then, we certainly can – even more!

Forerunners of obedience run not only all over the Bible but also throughout Church history:

Amy Carmichael (1867-1951) obeyed God’s call and came to India.

William Carey (1761-1834) obeyed God’s call and came to India.

David Livingstone’s (1813-1873) obedience to God’s call took him to Africa.

Adoniram Judson’s (1788-1850) obedience landed him in Burma.

Hudson Taylor (1832-1905) sailed to China in obedience to God’s call.

6] Failures:

There is no one without failures in this world. For those who love God no failure is final. Failures, crises, suffering, losses, disappointments and such things belong to the same category. In the providence of God, all these can be redemptively used to learn obedience.

Why does God take us through difficult and depressing situations? Hebrews 12:9 seems to give the most satisfying answer: ”We have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in SUBJECTION to the Father of spirits and live?” Jesus was not exempted from this experience except that in His case there was and could be no failure but only suffering. The Son of God as the Son of Man graduated with honours in the school of suffering, with obedience as the major. The author of Hebrews writes in Chapter 5:8-9 ”Though He was a Son, yet He learned obedience by the things which He suffered. And having been perfected, He became the author of eternal salvation to all who OBEY Him.”

Except in very rare circumstances, failures in life are due to disobedience to the Word of God and His revealed will. Failures are God’s attention-getters. Failures bring us to knees. Repeated failures make us prostrate before God. If we don’t learn from failures, we are only learning to fail. Henry Ford forgot to put a reverse gear in his first car. No one repeated that mistake. Hear the testimony of the Psalmist in Psalm 119:67,71 ”Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep Your word…It is good for me that I have been afflicted, that I may learn Your statutes”.

Disadvantages in life also usually keep us humble and obedient. Some failures are beyond us, but we are responsible for most of the failures in our lives. An objective and honest analysis of these failures would teach us how we can avoid them by watchfulness and diligence. Failures break our arrogance and stubbornness, and make obedience easy.

7] Future:

Finally, obedience becomes easy when we think of the future rewards God has promised to those who obey Him. The author of Hebrews says in Hebrews 4:9,11 ”There remains therefore a rest for the people of God. .. Let us therefore be diligent to enter that rest, lest anyone fall according to the same example of disobedience.” Obedience may be a struggle now, but this struggle will be over in eternity. Hebrews 4:10 says ”For he who has entered His rest has himself also ceased from his works as God did from His!” One day of rest in God’s literal presence will be worth all the efforts we took for thousands of days on earth to walk in obedience before Him!

Jesus spoke about two buildings in His Sermon on the Mount. One was built by a wise man and the other by someone foolish. The wise man was one who lived and worked in obedience to God’s will revealed in His Word. His building withstood all storms and floods. But the building of the disobedient man was washed away (Matthew 7:24-25). This illustration was the conclusion of Christ’s longest recorded sermon. It was a warning against disobedience, more so a motivation for obedience! If I believe in life after death I must choose to obey God in life before death.

Let me close this with a promise from the Old Testament. Deuteronomy 28:13 says, ”The Lord will make you the head and not the tail; you shall be above only, and not be beneath, if you heed the commandments of the Lord your God, which I command you today, and are careful to observe them.”

Let us introspect ourselves..

Shall we trust our Lord wholeheartedly so that we will be able to obey Him like Abraham?

Shall we fear our Lord so that we will be able to obey Him like Noah?

Shall we have a reverential fear for God which stops arguments and rebellion in our minds?

Shall we obey our Lord by knowing that we are His children as He bought us on the cross of Calvary?

Shall we have the fellowship with our close friends in prayers and spiritual life so that it would lead to obey our God like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego?

Shall we try to unlearn our ways of disobedience from those who walked in obedience so that we can also walk in obedience to God?

Shall we use failures, crises, sufferings, losses, disappointments happening in our life to learn obedience like our Lord Jesus, though He was a Son of God, yet He learned OBEDIENCE by the things He suffered?

Let us Pray: Our Heavenly Gracious Father, we thank you for helping us to understand about “How Obedience is made easy” as Your yoke is easy and Your burden is light. Yes Father, Your commands are not burdensome. Father, please help us to trust You wholeheartedly, to fear You, to have a reverential fear for You which removes arguments and rebellions in our minds, help us to obey You as Your children, have fellowship with our friends and relatives besides help us to unlearn our ways of disobedience by seeing those who walked in obedience in the past Lord. Father, please help us to use our failures, crises, sufferings, losses, disappointments to learn obedience like Your beloved Son Lord Jesus. Please help us to run with perseverance the race marked out for us by doing Your commandments so that we may have the right to the tree of life and enter through the gates into the city Father. We give all praise, glory and honour to Your Holy Name. In Jesus name we pray. Amen.

God bless you all..

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plaidstiel-wormstache · 6 years

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Above the Northern Lights

Christmas Challenge: request by @grace-for-sale with Cass and the song Above the Northern Lights by Mannheim Steamroller Listen to this first, as it’s more of a feeling I got that inspired the below... AN: the biggest thank you goes to the best beta a writer could ask for - @whispersandwhiskerburn. She wrote half of this, giving it an added sense of magic. Thank you my wonder woman!

Castiel had always watched earth with great interest. The angel watched each creature, but one more so than others. The one that dominated the planet, sprawled across its surface, claiming everything as its own. Humans intrigued Castiel. Not only because it was his Father’s command to watch over the two-legged creatures, to shepherd and care for them, but because he was fascinated by them. By their rituals and short lives. How quickly they formed emotional attachments, and how quickly those bonds could be broken. But in all his observation, there was one particular time and series of traditions drew his fascination more than others.

Each culture, each religion, they all had one common theme: love. A celebration of sorts that brought them all together. Towards the end of each human year, everyone seemed to shift into a certain way of thinking. They thought about the ones they loved, the things they held dear.

Soon Winter Solstice began - a festival of hope and determination. A celebration of life, the bringing together of communities; villages, clans, groups. They came together in the coldest and darkest times of the year and got through it together. Showing what humanity was truly capable if it worked together. Then Christmas was created - a holiday to celebrate God, though it quickly grew larger than that. Sure people would attend church, some would pray, some would create lists of tomorrow’s feasts, some would even fall asleep. But everyone seemed to have their spirits lifted.

And soon The Angel’s own thoughts lifted, He began to look forward to these celebrations. There was Christmas and Hanukkah, Bodhi Day and Eid al-Adha, The Winter Solstice and The Day of the Return of the Wandering Goddess. Saturnalia, Yule, Kwanzaa and Shade-Yulda, Omisoka and Diwali. So many celebrations, so much Happiness. How could the people of earth not see the shared experience and accept each other. There was so much colour and creation and joy! He especially liked the lights. The glittering and twinkling of all different colours. What wasn’t to love?

So when Castiel found himself grace-less and stranded as a human, he turned to a time that seemed, from above, to make everyone happy. End of year Holidays. He started to put together a list of what he wanted to experience while on earth, things he hadn’t been able to do while leading an Angelic garrison. Mecca for Eid al-Adha, watching as families and friends came together in prayer, sharing meat; a third to the poor, a third to friends and finally keeping the remains for themselves. New Delhi for the third day of Diwali, all the candles that were lit in so many homes across many countries, not to mention the fireworks that could be seen from heaven. A small street in Craigmore, Australia. Every house on the street came together, no matter their differences and arguments throughout the year; combining their lights, creating one long scene. And then finally, seeing the Aurora Borealis from below. Looking up into a black sky and seeing the bright colors of spirits, temporarily caught and floating just above the surface of the earth, flying close to those they were told to watch over.

Alas, the Angel never experienced these miracles, these small human feats. Instead, he stayed close to his new brothers, his new family. He took his father’s word as the only direction he needed, protecting human life in whatever way he could.

Castiel had died many times.

He supposed it had something to do with his choice of the Winchesters and humanity, but the fact remained that he had been banished countless times, assumed many different forms, fought in countless angelic battles, and died more than probably any other Angel in creation.

Most of the time, he didn’t remember what happened when he wasn’t inhabiting an earthly vessel or in Heaven. In fact, he had discovered that there were many times he’d had his memory rewritten by Heaven’s forces, so who knew how many different times he’d been recreated.

But this time was different.

After being cast out of the Empty, he drifted through time and space, nebulous, lost, unaware of what was happening around him. He needed to get back to Earth, back to the Winchesters, but he didn’t know how.

The first moment he had any type of realization of self after the blankness of the Void was a tingling of beauty, of magic in the air. He found himself awake, not in his vessel, but in his Angelic form-- a multidimensional wavelength of song, power, and light. And he knew his location instinctually, a place that was home to many spiritual beings. The Northern Lights. He had finally made it there, when he hadn’t actually meant to arrive… and it was just as beautiful as he’d always hoped.

The energy produced by so many beings coexisting let off colors visible even to the poor human eyes, but to Castiel-- he was awash in a kaleidoscope of dreams and images, hopes and faith, all being poured into the celestial beings that existed in this one section of time and space.

It was Christmas, and the combined beliefs and emotions of so many mortals aimed at so many religions buoyed him up on wings made of magic and dreams, and Castiel was relieved to feel safe, to begin his healing.

Here in this moment, above the Northern Lights on Christmas night, he would discover himself again. He would heal and find his old form. And, soon, he’d find his way through time and space to the Winchesters.

But for now, he would dance across the sky in the endless light and be thankful to have escaped the dark one more time.

Tagging:

@akshi8278 @dont-trust-humanity @yoursmilemakesmeloveyou @redlipstickandplaid @lipstickandwhiskey @jensen-jarpad @avasmommy224 @munlis @arryn-nyxx @autopistaaningunaparte @babypieandwhiskey @beckawinchester @blacktithe7 @bringmesomepie56 @chaos-and-the-calm67 @charliebradbury1104 @chvalkenberg95 @clairese1980 @dancingalone21 @ellen-reincarnated1967 @eyes-of-a-disney-princess @fandoms-are-the-best-escape @frenchybell @gabby913 @green-love-red-fantasyhearts @hasta-impalasta @i-like-your-assbutt-dean @ilostmyshoe-79 @impala-dreamer @impalaimagining @iwriteaboutdean @jalove-wecallhimdean @kazchester-fanfiction @kristaparadowski @leatherwhiskeycoffeeplaid @lucifer-in-leather @lucis-unicorn @melonberri @manawhaat @mogaruke @mrswhozeewhatsis @nichelle-my-belle @notnaturalanahi @oriona75 @ruprecht0420 @sdavid09 @sherloki-moriartea @thegreatficmaster @waywardjoy @wheresthekillswitch @whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname @wi-deangirl77 @wideawakeandwriting @you-know-whodoesthat-crazypeople @maddieburcham1 @captainemwinchester @samwinjarpad @kittenofdoomage @room-with-a-cat @atc74 @katymacsupernatural @emoryhemsworth @sandlee44

#christmas challenge #holiday season #castiel #spnfanficpond #supernatural #northern lights #spn fanfiction

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trinamcmichaels01 · 4 years

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Americas Blessing of Freedom & Hope

Where is your family from and also why did they pertain to America?

Have you ever before visited the communist countries of China, Russia, Cuba, North Korea, Laos, or Vietnam?

I've had the honor of traveling to many parts of the globe, and also loved individuals of virtually every nation. My heart made those who were incapable to appreciate the liberties of choice and also self direction that Americans consider given each day.

What do you provide for a living? Whether you are a physician, educator, auto mechanic, IT person, or full time parent; I would imagine you selected that course for your life since you appreciated specific facets of that work, and you have the ability to be compensated for it.

What if you had no say towards your life, and also your future was exclusively dictated to you by the federal government?

I can not assume of a faster method to off the trigger of life in one's eyes than completely eliminating their own firm from their lives. Sadly, that is what happens in communist/socialist nations America National politics.

Do you want to move there completely as well as give up your American flexibilities and also opportunities?

Do you want to make America into an additional China, Russia, Cuba, North Korea, Laos, or Vietnam?

Your candidate for Head of state in America need to have 2 goals:

1) Dedication to expanding the stability and also stamina of their nation.

2) The prospect needs to dedicate to shield as well as safeguard their residents' civil liberties.

Why do people leave a country?

- Anxiety of safety and security for themselves as well as their family members from violence.

- Anxiety of oppression for their beliefs.

- Extraordinary destitution as well as no possibilities for altering it.

- Federal government corruption and overreach that stifles private options as well as development as well as forces conformity.

Are you and your household looking to import where they came from to America?

What are the differences in between their residence country as well as America?

Your candidate for President in America should have 2 objectives?

1) Be committed to expanding the stability and strength of their nation.

2) The candidate should dedicate to safeguard and also protect their residents' civil liberties.

Obtain the facts, assume meticulously prior to you act as well as vote for Head of state of the USA on Nov. 3, 2020!

I have appreciated seeing, mentor, as well as carrying out on my violin as well as viola throughout the globe. This consists of communist countries. I have always mored than happy as well as delighted ahead back residence to America as well as our many true blessings and also freedoms! It is a true eye opener to see how privileged we remain in America.

We have lots of chances right here to begin a business, choose the job we wish to do, to have property, pray as we pick, protect our legal rights to totally free speech, protect ourselves and our house and property, the right to believe and also share our thoughts with others.

We have great sanitation, plumbing, drinkable running water, electrical power with washrooms that work which permit you to wash your hands with soap and also water to keep germs and sickness from running through entire cities America National politics.

After checking out these foreign locations, I was constantly so grateful for the true blessings and liberties of living and also operating in America.

" In Communism the government owns all property and pays its residents similarly. Citizens possess absolutely nothing. The government chooses your job and also tells you what to do. They have you! There is no free choice!"

Communism/Socialism is often considered in scholastic and also media circles as an "every little thing is free because it is a right". There is no liberty when you depend on the government to determine what you are worthy of.

The American Revolution has actually stood the examination of time because we are reminded that our liberties originate from God, not male.

Communism removes all your rights, your property, your chances, your options, and your flexibilities. This consists of thinking, prayer, organization.

Birds Eye View on Communism in Russia:

The flick, Moscow on the Hudson" (1984) was created and also guided by Paul Mazursky and also starred Robin Williams, as Vladimir Ivanoff, a saxophonist with the Moscow Circus who is carrying out as well as going to in New york city City. He decides to problem while shopping at Bloomingdale's in New york city City. Director Mazursky stated the concept for the film originated from his very own grandpa emigrating to the USA from Russia.

He states, "A lot of Russians, are just attempting to survive. Yet, all Russians that leave their country, leave something they prize and also love. It's a terrible dispute for them, so the act of valor is frustrating."

The movie opens up with Vladimir in Russia living "in a congested apartment with his extended family." After that "he stands in line for hrs to buy toilet paper and also shoes." It takes as long to acquire the toilet tissue and also footwear that he's late to rehearsal. Boris, the communist event participant, KGB,

" slams Vladimir for being late to practice session and also suggests Vladimir may miss the approaching journey to the USA.". Vladimir immediately hands over to Boris, the footwear from the shop that made him late. After wedding rehearsal Vladimir selects his friend to buy fuel for his car from a "black market dealership."

After Vladimir flaws he has numerous American residents that have actually promptly agreed to assist him. They give him an area to stick with their family members, help him in locating work, as well as a recent American person from Cuba who his lawyer.

True blessings of America: America is not excellent, however it is our last beacon of hope!

America was improved Judeo/Christian worths, order, sanctity, capitalism, entrepreneurship, as well as free enterprises. America is a land of possibilities. Our United States Constitution safeguards our freedoms. The of our Constitution were smart enough to understand that our unalienable legal rights did not originate from federal government or male; they originated from God. They were likewise smart adequate to develop the Constitution as well as Expense of Rights to be exclusionary (clarifying what Government can refrain from doing, rather than all things it can do).

The very liberties that a lot of us consider granted like the search of life, freedom, and the quest of joy, freedom of religion, freedom of expression, freedom of the press, freedom of assembly, and liberty to petition the federal government to ideal wrongs are what make this nation wonderful. It is also why this excellent nation of ours is a magnet for people from throughout the globe that answer the "battle-cry of their souls to be free by looking for citizenship."

Your candidate for President in America should have 2 objectives?

1) Dedication to expanding the security and strength of their nation.

2) The prospect should commit to shield and also protect their citizens' rights.

What is Kristallnacht?

Kristallnacht, (additionally called the Evening of Broken Glass). On November 9-10, 1938, Pogroms, violent troubles, (strikes, looting, arson, mass arrests, and fatality) were performed against the Jews by SA paramilitary forces (tornado troopers) and also civilians throughout Nazi Germany, Austria, the Sudetenland, Czechoslovakia, Slovak, Bohemia, Poland, and also Moravia. These rioters damaged, struck, robbed, and also knocked down Jewish organizations, homes, schools, hospitals, and Synagogues with sledgehammers. After the assaults smashed glass was left on the roads.

" British chronicler Martin Gilbert wrote that no event in the background of German Jews between 1933 and also 1945 was so widely reported as it was occurring, and also the accounts from foreign journalists working in Germany sent out shockwaves around the world."

The Times of London observed on November 11,1938: "No international propagandist curved upon blackening Germany before the globe can outshine the tale of burnings as well as poundings, of blackguardly attacks on helpless and also innocent people, which reproached that nation the other day."

Communism is total government control. Damaging down of order, robbery destruction, arson, death. Pogroms, Kristallnacht, eliminating statues (eliminating history), instilling the young, (mind washing), no responsibility, versus independent thinking, against self-sufficiency, against family members worths, versus faith, versus human spirit. Tramples on constitution. Takes all your rights and freedoms away America National politics.

Where is my family from?

My family is from Russia and Hungary where there were no civil liberties, no selections, no possibilities, no complimentary speech, no right to a fair test. You did what the federal government authorities informed them to do. There was no freedom of speech. No owning of residential or commercial property. There was no selection in anything. The government determined what your profession would certainly be. When you said to attempt as well as safeguard yourself, they would toss you behind bars as well as eliminate you.

America is the only place you can go from cloths to treasures. In other nations if you were birthed bad you remain that way permanently. Mark J. Quann, writer, claimed in 2017, "Immigrants Are 4 Times More Likely to End Up Being Millionaires in America."

The number of immigrants show up in the United States each year? "More than 1 million immigrants show up in the U.S. each year. In 2017, the leading country of origin for brand-new immigrants entering into the U.S. was India, with 126,000 individuals, followed by Mexico (124,000), China (121,000) and also Cuba (41,000)." https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2019/06/17/key-findings-about-u-s-immigrants/

Ages 18 or Older: Suppose what you are being informed is Not 100% real? Do you question what you are informed and seek to inspect the reality? Do you inform yourself? Are you responsible for your activities? What is your goal or dream?

Just in America will certainly you be provided the chance to pick your desire and help it!

Rebecca Walser, skilled author of "Wide range Unbroken", states, In America "you are encouraged to take control of your life, your fate, and that is something billions of individuals do not have."

Communist China in 2016 had a populace of 1.4 billion. "Their people had just an ordinary per capita disposable revenue of $3,469 in 2016." Compare this "to 320 million Americans who had $43,536 per capita non reusable yearly income that same year." (Walser, Wide Range Unbroken).

Your candidate for President in America should have 2 objectives?

1) Be dedicated to growing the security and also stamina of their country.

2) The candidate ought to commit to secure as well as defend their citizens' rights.

Why have numerous people concern America? America is Not Perfect, but it has opportunities and also remarkable possibilities that communism does not have!!!!!

These immigrants from Russia, China, Laos, and other nations that have ended up being residents of America are "Not begging" to go back to the countries they have actually run away from!

These 5 plus months of the pandemic and also being homebound has actually brought tension and also anxiousness to America with civil unrest, rioting, looting, and also murder. This is a suggestion of pogroms in Russia as well as Kristallnacht, (Night of Broken Glass) in Nazi Germany, Austria, the Sudetenland, Czechoslovakia, Slovak, Bohemia, Poland, and also Moravia America Politics.

Assume and obtain truth realities, before you elect Head of state of the USA on Nov 3, 2020!

Your candidate for Head of state in America should have 2 objectives?

1) Be devoted to expanding the stability as well as toughness of their nation.

2) The candidate needs to commit to shield and also protect their people' civil liberties.

Remember what President Ronald Reagan claimed, "Flexibility is never ever more than one generation away from termination ... It should be fought for, secured, and handed on for them to do the exact same.".

Assume and also obtain the true truths before you vote on Nov. 3, 2020.

Do you intend to maintain your legal rights as well as privileges in America or provide up?

Background of American Ballot Rights.

Among the wonderful points concerning living in the USA of America is that we do not undergo fifty percent as several struggles to vote as newly democratic countries. Although now it might seem that voting is virtually considered approved, the history of American voting civil liberties is not so quite. This write-up will check out the development of the American voting civil liberties from the birth of the nation previously.

Initially of American background, just white males over the age of 21 might take part in the vote. In addition, the head of state and vice president were chosen separately, and legislators were not directly chosen in all. Remember the selecting university's enact concerns to the presidency, too. Nonetheless, there were a number of modifications that occurred throughout our history to place the elections much more in the hands of the people-all individuals.

After the Civil Battle finished, the newly rejoined country passed numerous amendments permitting the newly launched slaves a lot more legal rights than ever before, allegedly equal with those of white citizens. Initially, the 13th Amendment eliminated enslavement, in addition to forced servitude, and also remains to ban these techniques. Second, the 14th Modification made slaves and their descendents total citizens of the United States, and also gave them the same rights as every various other resident in America. Lastly, the 15th Amendment banned voter discrimination based on race, shade, and heritage. With each other, these were known as the Restoration Modifications.

You may have observed that although people can not lawfully stop others from electing based on color, there was absolutely nothing consisted of about gender. Even after African-American males got the right to vote, females of both shades were not able to do so. Ultimately, in 1920, the 19th Modification provided females suffrage. This wanted straight election of senators was given to the people (17th Change, 1913) America Politics.

The Vietnam Battle was a time of great civil discontent. Initially, the 26th Modification reduced the voting age to 18 due to the fact that 18-year-olds were being dispatched to battle without also obtaining the chance to choose their leader. This happened in 1971. Previously, yet also during the long period of time of the Vietnam War, the little ways people handicapped African-Americans from electing concerned national focus.

People powerless black citizens by instituting poll tax obligations, proficiency examinations, and also grandpa stipulations. Because these were unreasonable and also borderline unlawful, individuals rebelled versus these methods, which cause President Lyndon Johnson signing the National Voting Civil Liberty Act of 1965. This act made the discrimination versus black voters completely prohibited.

A Vote For Capitalism Or Corporatism.

A window of opportunity will be in the political election of 2011. This window will enable you to cast your ballot, for or against business America. While I need to confess, that the business influence is healthy on both sides of the island, it is dominate away. You absolutely do not need me to inform you which side has actually fallen totally in bed with the enemy of industrialism.

You just need to see, that is attempting to empower corporate tax obligation evasion, company authority, in taking apart lengthy established labor laws and that looks for to alter our entitlements (social safety and security, Medicare) into independently run business who's motive would be to earn money, rather than assist those that need aid. While they are pressing now, harder than they ever before have, they are still steadfast in not permitting the rich to pay at least as much taxes as the middle class.

Big corporations pay much less than 15 percent in tax obligations, some really pay none. Some pay no tax obligations and also receive cost-free money from the federal government on top of that; called aids. Warren Buffet (Billionaire) remarks that his personal assistant pays a greater tax price than he himself does. The millionaire tax obligation brace is practically 35 percent now, after the George Shrub tax cuts; yet they hardly ever pay this rate as they use funding gains technique to submit, and also this tax obligation bracket is around 15 percent. Given that Head of state Obama's political election, there has actually been a battle to raise the millionaire brace from 35 percent to the original 39 percent. This was the keystone with the brand-new republican tea party; that they were regarded to of held congress captive over not permitting that 4 percent boost. Rather, they pressed really tough to make massive cuts, every one of which will certainly come directly out of the pockets of the bad and also middle classes.

The Shrub tax obligation cuts took 2.5 trillion dollars out of the United States economic climate over one decade. Two battles an additional 2 trillion bucks. The Bush deregulation of monetary laws, permitted hoggish financial institutions and their CEO's to control negative home mortgage, which resulted in the financial collision of 2008, that we are still suffering from. All the above, were activities developed by corporate power and impact through our government, right up to the desk of the presidency its self. All of this pain to our economic situation was developed by millionaires, billionaires and also powerful companies.

With the recent debt ceiling crisis, we now find that it is NOT corporate America that will pay for these horrendous activities, however those that were the targets to begin with; the center course. Corporate wide range has raised 10 layer in 10 years, while the middle class has actually been downsized with enhancing healthcare expenses, as well as level wages. Company America has 2.5 trillion bucks saved up and stashed here in the US. The affordable collapse of 2008 taught them how to run their firms with less people, raising their earnings, as well as keeping unemployment extremely high. Business America is estimated to have 2 trillion dollars stashed in off shore accounts to avoid the little tax obligations they do pay. This cash, will never flow down to the center course - not in a million years. In addition, one tenth of one percent of the globes population possesses 55 percent of the globes wealth America National politics.

In these times, its very important to not perplex conservative national politics with business monopolies in this one regard. Traditional individuals have a legitimate disposition as do liberals. Each party is merely a preferred method of establishing the government. Actually, all nations all over the world have these 2 possibilities that are maintained in balance.

Yet the sad point here is that conservatives have actually had their party penetrated by big corporate money and control; pulling the puppet strings of congress, bombarding state legislatures with pro corporate expenses. The conservative experts (individuals who discuss national politics) are paid, and also paid well by these company teams which have attacked the conventional party as a hook worm lives below the skin. The firms have moved in under the radar with conservatists, by hiding under the umbrella of conservative concepts, yet in truth they have actually currently overtaken the conventional motion; and also to the conservatives hinderance they have really been educated to safeguard the very same oppressor through the bombardment of the media statements the experts are paid to project.

A Democratic, Market Issue That Brings completion of America As Projection by Daniel the Prophet.

Alexander Tyler, a Scottish history teacher at the College of Edinburgh, assessed the fall of the Athenian Republic some 2,000 years prior. He is credited with saying that a freedom is constantly momentary until citizens discover that they can elect themselves generous presents from the general public treasury. From that moment on, the bulk constantly votes for the candidates who promise the most benefits from the general public treasury, with the result that every freedom will lastly fall down over loosened fiscal plan, (which is) constantly complied with by a dictatorship.

The typical age of the world's greatest people has actually been about 200 years throughout which we see this series: "From bondage to spiritual belief; From spiritual confidence to great guts; From courage to freedom; From freedom to abundance; From wealth to complacency; From complacency to apathy; From lethargy to reliance; From reliance back right into chains." America's Obituary: Born 1776, Died 2012.

America, started as a republic, is currently a freedom where the bulk ballot money on their own in welfare programs. Demographics are an upcoming issue with amnesty of prohibited aliens, as recommended by Daniel's prophetic publication.

Teacher Olson includes: "In aggregate, the map of the region Romney won was primarily the land possessed by the taxpaying people of the country.

Obama territory primarily encompassed those citizens living in reduced revenue tenements and living off various kinds of federal government well-being ..." Almost fifty percent of the US is in the "governmental dependency" stage. If Congress grants amnesty as well as citizenship to twenty million criminal intruders called illegals, we can say goodbye to the UNITED STATES.

Does the Bible have any light on this subject? When inquired about completion of the globe, Christ said to understand guide of Daniel. Matthew 24:3,15. "Throughout the end" the king of the north "overflows" the king of the south, Daniel 11:40. That is the king of the north? The Scriptures is its very own expositor-it interprets itself ...

In Ezekiel 26:7, the king of the north is the king of Babylon, but we also see that in the end-time, this is not about a city in Iraq, however regarding baffled systems of federal government, health, eduction, well-being as well as religious beliefs (Babylon).

Babylon is redefined in Rev 17:5 where we see images of a church riding the beast of New Globe Order. The female (church) is entailed with national politics, It's an affluent church dressed with gold and the shade of scarlet, being in a city of 7 hills, and also drunken with the blood of saints-historically a persecuting church.

So exactly how does Babylon "overflow" the king of the south? With numerous illegal aliens overruning our southern border having their key allegiance to the pope, it's no secret just how the king of the north will certainly win in a freedom in which millions elect as informed.

A pal asked a Mexican couple that he met in Montana why they move there. They responded, The clergyman told us to relocate here.

The pope states he has no problem with a Marxist tag, (Google it) yet he would not concur with Marx that faith is "the opium of the people. The abolition of faith as the illusory happiness of the people is needed for their genuine happiness.".

However maybe Marx is right when it involves Catholicism. Numerous believe they can live as they please via the week, yet reach paradise by paying the priest on Sunday.

The pope intends to see a redistribution of riches. Why not confess the priest can not forgive sins (Mark 2:7) and repay the cash to the inadequate that, in many cases, provided the clergyman their last cow to get papa out of purgatory (a word not found in the Bible).

In contrast to every other country south of our border, America was started by Protestants taking the chance of stormy seas, bitter winters and also starvation to run away the Vintage Order injustice tht we might be inviting under New World Order, Rev 13:15 -17.

Leaders offered us a Constitution various from every various other country in its stipulations for self-government as well as splitting up of church and also state to ensure that Congress ought to make no laws favoring a spiritual facility (like they did in the institution voucher program preferring parochial institutions of which the wonderful majority are Catholic as are the Supreme Court Justices, etc

. Prior To Ballot, Consider Your VIEW Of America!

Today, we seem to be experiencing a time period, when there is more quarrel, division, and also polarization, as we have experienced, in current memory, and also, maybe, the larger quantity of people, that appear to be, reluctant, to look for any commonalities, in order to secure, a far greater opportunity at getting to, a meeting - of - the - minds, than, this country has seen, because our Civil War! No doubt, there are a number of factors for this, including, economic, racial/ ethnic, etc, but, a lot of this, might have been, brought - to - a - head, due to the unusual nature of Head of state Trump, and also, the way, he typically appears, to appeal, to disgust and also divisiveness, as opposed to bringing individuals together! Why do several, that oppose Trump, fail to be able to see, anything, positive concerning his management, while Trump advocates, stay dedicated to him, and absolutely nothing, he seems to claim, or do, adjustments that? Wouldn't it make good sense, before voting, each people, should, seriously, think about, our VIEW of what this nation represents, has represented, is today, and also what we wish for, right into the future? Keeping that in mind, this write-up will certainly try to, briefly, think about, take a look at, review, and also go over, using the mnemonic method, what this implies and stands for, and why it matters America National politics.

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02/15/2018 DAB Transcript

Exodus 39:1-40:38, Mark 1:1-28, Psalms 35:1-16, Proverbs 9:11-12

Today is the 15th day of February. Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible. I am Brian. It’s great to be here with you today to take the next step. So, yesterday was a big day - Valentine's Day, we talked about the beginning of Lent, finished the book of Matthew yesterday, the first of the Gospels, which will lead us, of course, into the book of Mark when we get to our New Testament reading. So we’ll talk about that when we get there. But first, the law is being given in the wilderness with the children of Israel and Moses and we’ll pick up with that story. We’re reading from the Contemporary English Version this week. Exodus chapter 39 and 40.

Mark:

Okay. So, I mentioned at the beginning that we concluded Matthew's gospel, which leads us, now, into Mark's gospel. And we should probably say up front, Mark wasn't one of the 12 disciples, he wasn't an apostle. He was rather, mostly, a long-term disciple of Peter. And we first see him show up in the Bible in the book of acts, which, obviously, we haven't gotten to yet. He’s also known as John Mark and he lived in Jerusalem and came from pretty well-to-do family. His mother's name was Mary. She had a big house. She had a servant whose name was Rhoda. So, John Mark's mother, Mary, was one of the earliest of believers and she opened her home to early believers. And church tradition holds that her home may have been the place of the upper room where the Holy Spirit was poured out on the early believers after Jesus ascension. Of course, that’s a church tradition that just goes way back. But it's not explicit in the Bible, but John mark, or Mark, was around the gospel all his life, even as a boy. The apostle Peter was captured by Herod. And we’ll read about this story little further into the New Testament. And he was going to be executed by Herod who had put other Christians to death. And this seemed to be pleasing the people. So, we plan to execute Peter, but an angel came and sprung Peter from jail. And it was to John Mark's house, to Mary's large home, that Peter first came. And all the believers were there praying earnestly for Peter. And that prayer was answered by God, sending an angel to spring Peter from jail. So, Peter comes to John Mark's house and Rhoda, the servant girl, comes to the door and sees him and slams the door in his face, basically, because she can't believe it's Peter. And that’s a story we’ll come to later, but it shows us a little bit about who Mark is. So, John Mark had been around the gospel his whole life. His cousin's name was Barnabas, who was a dear friend of the apostle Paul. And Mark went with Barnabas and Paul on Paul's first missionary journey. So, there is a long pedigree with Mark. And church tradition holds that Mark later became a disciple of the apostle Peter and traveled all around the countryside with him and served as an interpreter in Italy, and especially in Rome. And everywhere that Peter went, he was there to share the gospel of Jesus Christ. So, John Mark had heard Peter's gospel over and over and over everywhere that they would go as Peter was evangelizing. And Mark recalls and remembers this because he’s heard it so many times. And he’s finally asked to write it down so people can remember the whole story that Peter's giving everywhere that he goes. And, so, Mark eventually does. In a real way, what Mark could be recording is the gospel according to Peter. And most agree that Mark himself was the writer of Mark. There’s some speculation as to the time of its writing, but most scholars believe this…and this might sound surprising to you…but the first books, the first Christian writings preserved in the New Testament are the earliest letters of Paul and, perhaps, the letter of James. The gospel of Mark, being the first of the Gospels, so the first narrative of the life and ministry of Jesus, came later. About 10 or 15 years after Mark comes Matthew and Luke. And they’re a few years apart. And then about a decade, maybe even more, later, comes the gospel of John. So, we’re in the section of the New Testament known as the Gospels - Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. And we’re about to enter the gospel of Mark, which is the first one. So, you may be like, yeah, I don't care about all this stuff, just read the Bible, but this stuff is actually kind of important. Because when we can understand it, then we can begin to see how the gospel developed and spread. So, Mark is the first of the Gospels, then comes Matthew, then comes Luke, then comes John. And they’re spread out over a couple of decades. So, they’re written at different times and they’re also written to different audiences. So, their purpose is different. Mark is writing for the first time, the life and times of Jesus. And Mark's gospel, more than any of the other Gospels shows the apocalyptic nature of some of Jesus teachings. We've already covered the apocalyptic worldview as we’ve talked before, but certainly will talk about it more in the gospel of Mark. Whereas the gospel of Matthew, that we just completed, was written for different purpose and to different people. Matthew was written to Jewish people and its intention was to show how Jesus connects to the Jewish story, how it's the same story, how Jesus fulfills prophecy, and how Jesus fulfilled the law. If Matthew were being written to a Gentile audience, they wouldn't even understand what was being talked about and they wouldn't particularly care that Jesus was fulfilling prophecies from a different religion. However, Mark influences Matthew and Luke. Matthew, Mark, and Luke are known as the synoptic Gospels. And we’ll talk more about that along the way. But that means that they share a lot of the same stories and in a lot of cases they share exactly the same wording. Now, as it turns out, Greek scholars have examined the Greek of St. Luke, which is very educated and well written, contrasted with the Greek used in the gospel of Mark, and it's very different. Mark's gospel is written almost in like fifth grade elementary, like it's written in very, very basic Greek. So, although Matthew and Mark use a lot of the material from Mark's gospel, they’ll often make corrections to the grammar and expand the stories, as the traditions and stories about Jesus are collected through oral tradition. So, that's kind of the lay of the land. What we’re going into as we go into the book of Mark is the first telling in written form in the New Testament of Jesus life and ministry. And we’ll see that it's focus is on Jesus and his ministry. For example, there isn't a birth story. Like, the Christmas story isn't in the gospel of Mark. It begins with Jesus ministry. And so, we begin the second gospel in the New Testament in order, but the first gospel in the New Testament in time. Mark 1, 1 through 28.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for Your word. We thank You for bringing us to this point. And as we enter into the gospel of Mark, we invite Your Holy Spirit. Jesus, it's You that we seek. You are our Savior and it's You that we are getting to know day by day through this process of sanctification. The Gospels, they give us the opportunity to follow along with You, hear the things You had to say, see the things that you did, all while modeling what humanity can look like, what humanity should look like, what it's supposed to look like. And, so, we pay such close attention, because the Gospels introduce us to Your heart. And, so, as we move into this second gospel we continue to invite You to reveal Yourself to us through the power of Your Holy Spirit. Come, Holy Spirit. We pray in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is the website, it’s home base, it’s where you find what's going on around here. So, check it out.

And it's just a couple of days from now, day after tomorrow…hooo…I have a lot of packing to do…that we will be boarding the big plane and heading across the ocean and landing in Tel Aviv. And many of you from all over the United States and the world will also be making that journey as we prepare to pilgrimage together throughout the land of the Bible. So, I’ve been mentioning this for a couple of days, mostly asking for the community here to begin interceding and praying over every aspect of this trip that we’ll be journeying together. And we’ll be making it as interactive as possible. We do this every year. And, so, we’ll be posting pictures as were at places and videos, when the signal is strong enough. And, so, we’ll be doing as much as we can to connect everybody. And I'll be talking about where we've been and what we’re doing on the Daily Audio Bible each day. But it is just a canopy of prayer that were raising up over this, over technology, over transportation, over safety, over stamina and health, over all of the aspects of moving a couple of busloads of people all over the land. So, if the Holy Spirit begins to move in you to pray as were there, then thank you. And if we come to mind while we’re there, then thank you for your prayers. And if you want to stay connected, I would recommend that you follow the Daily Audio Bible Facebook page, which is facebook.com/dailyaudiobible or follow us on Instagram. This is where we’ll be posting the most. And about halfway through the trip we’ll be doing a Facebook Live from the Sea of Galilee, not from the shores of the Sea of Galilee, but from where we’ll be staying at the Sea of Galilee. So, we’ll give more details as we get closer, but just wanting to pray for this in advance and keep on praying over it as we move through the land of the Bible. So, thank you for your prayers.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible. If what we’re doing here is bringing life to you, then thank you for your partnership so that it can exist and continue to bring light and good news into the world through God's spoken word each day. There’s a link at dailyaudiobible.com on the homepage. If you're using the Daily Audio Bible app, you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or, if you prefer, the mailing address is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And as always if you have a prayer request or comment 877-942-4253 is the number to dial.

And that's it for today. I'm Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Good morning Daily Audio Bible family. It is February 8th. My name is Barbie and I live in Mechanicsburg Pennsylvania and I wanted to call today for two specific sisters. I wanted to call for Salvation is Mine and for Melody from Canada. Ladies, I heard your prayers this morning. I heard your cries and I want you to know that you are so dear to my heart. And I am going to pray right now. Father, I pray for Salvation is Mine, that she rest in that promise, that she would hear Your voice calling to her, that You would open her eyes to see that You are with her, that she is not alone, that she is not invisible, that she is the only thing that You are looking at right now Lord. Comfort her and give her the strength that needs to move about her days, to be a light in her world, and the witness of Your glorious love. Father, I lift up Melody in Canada. The pain that she feels right now of wanting so deeply to have a career and to be a mother. And it hurts so much to want something that is being denied to you. Lord, I pray that you would give her just strength in knowing that this is for Your glory. We do not know what Your future plans are for her but in this time, as You call to her, I pray that she would respond, that her heart would be moved toward You, that You would use this time of rest to strengthen her for whatever is that You have in store for her and her future. Mold her into the woman that you are calling her to be and let her be strengthened by You Lord in this time. Give her a hunger and thirst for Your word for your company, that every…

Hey Daily Audio Bible. This is Paul from Houston and I want to pray for people as we’re going into Valentine’s Day next week. I want to pray for the folks that are brokenhearted, the people that are hurting from strained relationships. And I looked at Psalm 34:18, the Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. So, I want to pray now. God, You are sovereign. I don’t understand why we go through this pain, but let that heal our brothers and sisters who are hurting. God, You loved us so much that You would spare Your own Son, but He endured the pain and hurt of the cross to redeem all of us to You. Thank You Lord for revealing Yourself and Your love to each of us in an individual way. Help us to know You personally and to know how much You love each of us individually. Please fill us with Your love so that we can pour Your love out into others that are around us each day. Bring them to know You Father so that we can know that we were made in Your image and for a purpose that You put in us before we were even born. Jeremiah 1:5, before I created you in your mother’s womb I knew you. Help us to know You Father. Help us to love those who are hurting and difficult to love. Thank You for Your presence. Pour out Your spirit, Your love on these brothers and sisters this Valentine’s Day and may they know, Ephesians 3:18, how wide, how long, and how high, and how deep is Your love for them. I just thank You Lord for being with us all Lord. Please give people peace and seal Your love and Your Spirit toward them and to know You personally, Father. And thank You. Thank You for the opportunity. Paul from Houston. Have a great Valentine’s Day…

Hello this is Candace from Oregon. Salvation is Mine, our beautiful, beautiful sister from San Leandro California. Our hearts ache for you amidst all that you’re going through. 2017 was shockingly difficult for so many of us. And in your case, I feel proud of you and honored that you are my sister when I remember your many calls across this past year and how many times you valiantly withstood hardship. A year like that requires recovery time. Please, immerse yourself in the Psalms. Cry out to Your beloved Savior, Jesus. It was kind of a shock to hear you say that you feel invisible. You are not invisible to us. And the Lord, Your beloved, as you engraved on the palm of his hand. He longs for you to just look to Him, cry out to Him, weep, even be angry. Just come to Him. Come to Him every minute that you have that you can and just pour out your heart. He loves you so deeply. One time, after I’d lost my husband of 41 years, a month later, it was in April I think, I asked the Lord to forgive me for how angry I was. And He…I heard Him in my heart say to me…I don’t have to forgive you for that…I hate death to. So, just know that you can fellowship with Him in a deeper way, even more than ever. So, go there my sister. We love you. We are praying for you.

Hello there. This is JoAnn Marie. I’m calling from Southern California. Today is Thursday, February 8th. I just heard Salvation is Mine. I heard you this morning. And I just want to give you a word of encouragement. I don’t know what’s going on in your life but about 10 years ago I had a semi-break down. I call it a breakthrough, but it was hell to go through. And God has totally seen me through the whole thing with my emotion, physical healing, finances. He just gave me help through other people. And one thing that you said, you’re struggling to keep it all together. You know what, it might be time not to keep it altogether and just continue to call out to God and let yourself have some of that time for healing for whatever it is that’s going on. But I do want to encourage you that God is with you He hears your call. If you can get the stamina up each day to praise Him no matter what it is you’re praying to Him as you praise Him, and it’s so good for your soul. Have a great day. And again, I’m praying for you Salvation is Mine. God is good. He is with you. Take courage. He will never leave you nor forsake you. Take care. bye-bye.

Bonnie, we heard you. I remember listening to your first call and telling us that your son was coming out of prison and asking for prayer for him. And Jacqueline we hear you. And others like Jacqueline who are screaming inside or so close to that, know that you are not alone even though it feels like that. I’ve been in a similar place myself. But you are not alone. And I know it’s no comfort right now, but God hears you, God ___ you and I pray, I’m praying so hard that He will give you…send you relief and surround you with people who will be an outlet for you where you can express even the feelings to get to the bottom of it and what’s going on. As well, I’ve got another comment Brian. Say, sometimes you leave on such a cliffhanger. Right? You get so into the story and suddenly you stop. It is like wait a minute I just can’t wait till tomorrow. I know that’s how it works but like today your reading along and then you finish on, look my betrayers here… And it’s like… No, you can’t stop now we need to know what happens next. Yeah, I know praise God. I’m getting into the Bible. It’s getting bad isn’t it? But yeah, thank you for your word again today. And it reminds us that, even though it’s a story that we’ve heard many, many times, it’s still relevant and it has relevance for us. All of these stories have relevance now as much as they did back then. This is Blessed by Him from Gloucester in the UK. I will run out of time probably. So, I’m just going to pray for a bit…but if I get cut off I get cut off. Have a blessed day wherever you are. Father God, we lift up Bonnie to You for her son. Thank you Lord that he’s coming out of prison and I pray Lord that you be at work in his heart and that he would want to come back to You and to read Sneezing Jesus and that You would be glorified in his life. Father God I lift up…

Hi DAB family this is Rhonda calling from the UK. I hope you are all doing good. Today I just wanted to pray for Pastor Gene. I heard that she’s in the hospital and I just pray Father Lord Almighty God that You touch her oh God with Your healing hand in the name of Jesus. We come against every attack of the enemy on our life and we pray Father Lord God that her suffering will stop and that she will begin to respond to treatment in the name of Jesus. I thank You Lord God tonight Lord God for Brian. Lord God I thank You for his ministry. I thank You for Jill. I thank You for China. I lift them all up on to Your throne of grace. I pray Your protection on Your call for them in Your life in the mighty name of Jesus. I pray Father Lord Almighty Father that You continue to use them for Your glory in the name of Jesus. Father Lord Almighty God I pray for those that are all over the world that are going through a lot of pain especially the cancer patient and in the midst of God I pray Father Lord Almighty God that You be with them and their family that You touch them and You heal them in the mighty name of Jesus. I pray tonight for Jacqueline oh God. I ask for the Lord Almighty God that You heal Jacqueline Almighty God. That she would know that she’s loved by You in the mighty name of Jesus. I pray for Sophie oh God. I lift her before Your throne of grace. I pray Father God that You make Your way for her where there is no way in the name of Jesus. I pray tonight also almighty Father Lord God also for __. For __ I ask Father Lord God that You bless her husband with a new job ___ that she desires in the mighty name of Jesus. Father Lord God we are just truly grateful for who You are and for what You are doing in each and every one of our lives Lord God. For those who pray regularly Father God I thank You Lord for their life, Blind Tony, Salvation is Mine, Daniel Junior, I thank You Father Lord God for Viola. Father Lord God I lift __ I lift them all before Your throne of grace and I speak blessing upon every member of this DAB community. I pray Father Lord…

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