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#i really do not have the words for it yet this is all only kind of expressing what i mean but oh well
simpjaes · 12 hours
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DAY-SHIFT. (p. sh)
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― part one here! After finding out that your boss has seen, heard, and instructed you through some pleasurable nights while parading around as a faceless cam-boy, you decide that your best course of action is to: call out sick. use vacation days. avoid Park Sunghoon at all costs. Unfortunately, ten days doesn’t appear to be nearly enough time to erase what’s happened, and Sunghoon refuses to be avoided. or the one where sunghoon pretends that he isn’t an anxious mess over accidentally exposing himself and you just so happen to have a lot of fucking empathy. 
minors dni 
PAIRING ― boss / cam boy!sunghoon x afab reader  
WORDCOUNT― 14.5k 
CONTENT― forbidden office romance kind of, smidge of angst if ur sensitive, mentions of predatory behavior from sunghoon, he is more desperate than he is dominant, just the way we like it.
NOTE ― bro im so sorry this took way too long to write, it also is way longer than it's supposed to be. but yknow. i had to do him right lmfao. NOT PROOF READ.
nsfw tags under cut
nsfw tags― perverted sunghoon, heavy petting, making out, foreplay on a chair lol, desk sex, very intimate shit ok? ok., pussy eating, jerking off, finger fucking, fingers-in-mouth antics, gagging, implications of something more than just an office fling, unprotected sex, he fills you UP!!! YIPEE!!! 
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
Avoidance.
That is the only way you know out of any awkward or unsavory situation. Avoid, avoid, avoid. Find a new job, change your name, dye your hair– question all of your life choices up to this point.
It’s the fact that never in your life have you had an interest in live sex cams. It was always just a porn video or a nice erotic novel for you. Sometimes curiosity gets the best of you though, like it does all people, and it’s not like you thought anyone would ever know who you are or catch you in the act of feeding into your curiosities. 
The one time you ever navigated to the live camera feed on your favorite porn site did shift your sexual appetite a little bit. A whole new world of seeing exactly what you want without needing to search for far too long for that perfect video…for a cost, of course.
You made good money already, and it’s not like you weren’t going for that promotion at the time either. You thought, why not? Why not pay a pretty, faceless man for some anonymous jerking off and move on with your life? 
The one time you found something to satiate the late night body-cravings, the point of pleasure ended up being…your boss?
Small world? Miniscule, fucking tiny little world. 
For days you wondered if Sunghoon’s text to you was just a coincidence. After all, the faceless man on screen didn’t say a word to you after you uttered the name of your boss. Even if he directly said your name. Even if Park Sunghoon uttered your false name at work. 
Consistent back and forth in your head. From, “No, how could that even be possible? No way is it him.” to “but Mr.Park started being weird after the first call, he used both names, he played off of the boss/employee dynamic.”
You’re going crazy as you send another email to your department, apologizing for taking so many days off but not truly apologetic. It’s been ten days now and Sunghoon has yet to text you again. 
That little “Can we talk?” can be heard in your head in his voice. Only now recognizing how clear and unique it truly is when he does speak. You try not to realize how similar the cam-boy sounded to him. Only connecting the dots when they force you to do it, really. You still try to convince yourself that the text was about firing you, given his actions at work that very same day. 
Maybe he was avoiding you because he felt awful about needing to fire you? 
Maybe he sent that text message to start the process of pushing you out? 
After all, it’s still very difficult to imagine Park Sunghoon having a cock that nice, or cum in that amount. Given, it’s not like you ever thought about him jerking off or anything, it’s just–
You don’t fucking know. Your brain is a mess of shaking anxiety and echoes of sexual frustrations and moans. 
You were refunded your money. He texted after the session. He said your name. It’s him, isn’t it?
You refuse to fucking find out.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
From:...[ [email protected] ]
BCC:...
Subject: Time off Request: Rejected. Insufficient PTO.
[insert your name here],
The time you have requested from the 27th to the 3rd has been rejected due to insufficient hours. As of last Thursday, you are no longer meeting the minimum hour requirement as a full-time employee. Your PTO is at 0 hours and 00 minutes and you now have three unexcused absences. Please return tomorrow with a signed order or note that exempts you from work. If you move forward without returning to the building, this will be grounds for termination. Please review the company handbook and job abandonment guidelines. 
Additionally, COO Lee, myself, and Division manager Park will be scheduling a meeting with you in the upcoming days, failure to appear will result in immediate termination.
Thank you,
HR
Well, fuck. You knew the time to avoid this would dry up, and this ten day hideaway to fake your death didn’t quite pan out.
Devastating, truly, that you have to walk through those doors with the same legs your boss may or may not have seen spread open for him through a grainy webcam image. Horrifying, that you have to look him in the eye and explain that you really were sick for the past ten days, that you definitely were not hiding the shame of your sexual desires.
The worst part about all of this? Not just the embarrassment but the fact that…you liked it. On that night, had he admitted it was him, you may not have ended the call yourself. It felt like it added some danger to your arousal at the time. Which, naturally, makes you more embarrassed now. Mostly because, at worst if that was Mr.Park, it was predatory. At best though? You very well may have consented.
But the what ifs don’t matter now. The only thing that matters is forcing yourself through the awkwardness of being at work after avoiding it for so long already.
Fortunately for you though, work is…weirdly normal. In fact, no one acts like you’ve missed ten days at all. You are greeted by the usual co-workers, you sit down at your desk and can log in as usual, and there are no warning emails or invitations for what would be considered a meeting of termination either. 
The day goes by just fine, suspiciously so. Sunghoon, though you’re avoiding him at the moment, doesn’t appear to be too out of character either. At one point, you were forced to drop corrected paper work off in his office, and he gave you the same usual and small “Thank you” before you stepped out with your legs threatening to buckle. 
Then again, his “casual” appreciation could just be your mind playing positive little tricks on you. Maybe it wasn’t casual at all. Maybe that little uncharacteristic breath afterwards isn’t just in your head. You didn’t make eye contact with him during that brief moment, and you did rush out quite quickly so you wouldn’t really know. However, in the deepest part of your brain his voice really does match the one who said all those dirty things to you. 
Maybe you’re still overreacting.
Or maybe you dreamed all of this up. 
You choose to remain unaware of the awkwardness around you solely because everything else is normal. Deep, deep down, you know. But you’re not giving that truth a chance to thrive or run your brain anymore.
And just as the day comes to an end, you’re actually feeling better. Anxiety is draining out of you, fear and embarrassment sit dormant in some hidden part of your brain over the small possibility of virtually fucking your boss. It seems you’ve let this work day clear up all of that fear in your head.
You were wrong, right? It wasn’t him, right? He’d have tried to defend himself by now. What boss wouldn’t be absolutely terrified that you’d report him, anyway? After all of that?
You actually feel a little dumb at the possibility of Mr. Park ever wanting you sexually, or ever even wanting to speak to you in that way. Asking to see your pussy? Telling you how to touch it? No, that’s definitely not him. Couldn’t be him. 
And your eyes do stray after a little while. Just to steal glimpses into his office, feeling relieved and weightless now that it appears your fears are over and finally understood. Doesn’t change the fact that now when you look at him, you might be wildly fucking attracted to him. Because fuck, imagine if that was him. You’re kind of forced to put his image to the faceless cam-boy now, not that you want to do that or anything. It just…you can’t really blame yourself for it.
You lend yourself a little laugh. As happy as you are that you’re able to convince yourself that it’s not Sunghoon’s cock you’ve yearned for, you really wouldn’t mind sleeping with someone as handsome as him. 
Crazy how the lack of anxiety lets you think those types of things though, isn’t it? When your brain is no longer fogged by fear or embarrassment, it’s like the clarity can sometimes be scarier simply because you don’t know how true certain statements are. Even through all of that fear, maybe a part of you wished it was him. 
Even with the weight on your shoulders lifted, in hindsight, maybe you’re even a little disappointed that it wasn’t. 
And, just as you’re preparing to clock out and head home with a big secret crush and a little pep in your step, you hear the familiar notification of an email. No problem, probably just a daily report or something. 
From:...[ [email protected] ]
CC:...
BCC:...
Subject: Mandatory Advising
[insert your name here],
Please come to my office before you leave for the day to discuss your conduct as of late. 
Thank you,
Park Sunghoon
Division Manager
000-000-0000 ext. 000
Well, double fuck. To think everything was fine despite you being well aware of that shit HR said to you previously? 
You barely recognize how the email is sent directly to you from Mr. Park, not including HR or COO Lee. In fact, the anxiety wells up inside of you so quickly that you nearly have to dry heave a few times before taking a deep breath. 
In your head, it’s not even about the web-cam session with a faceless man anymore. Your anxiety about that died the moment you successfully lied to yourself enough, now you’re genuinely just afraid you’ll lose your job or that beloved promotion you worked so hard to be qualified for. You just had to let your anxiety run your life for the past ten days, didn’t you? After all, skipping work to such an extent? Everyone had to have known that it was a lie eventually.  
So, you stand to your feet, brush off your thighs, and attempt to keep your heart from pounding as you make your way to Mr. Park’s office expecting to see HR, COO Lee, and a severance package on the desk waiting for your signature. 
Instead, you walk in to just find your boss. He’s looking at you as he normally would, eyes focused on his screen before glancing at you for a moment and nodding his head to one of the chairs in front of his desk. 
“Mr. Park–” You start, nearly wincing at the way you say it because, well, you haven’t said it since the night you had your pussy out on display. It’s only natural to physically react, right?
“One moment.” He says in a small voice, clicking a few times with the mouse as you watch the monitor light shine across his cheeks with each window he minimizes. 
It’s silent for a few moments as you awkwardly look around an office you’ve been in countless times. His lights are always dimmed, the temperature is always comfortable. You’re gonna miss this office, though it’s not your own. It was a nice, brief escape before all of this if you’re being honest. 
“How was work for you today?” He turns his attention to you, finally adjusting and rolling his chair to center himself in front of you behind his desk 
You pause at the question, unintentionally tilting your head at it like a puppy. “Good? Normal, I guess?” 
You watch as he nods with a tight-lipped expression, eyes falling to his desk as he takes in a deep and disappointed sounding breath. 
“Well, that’s one of us.” He huffs out, causing you to feel a bit confused with his tone. Is he being…passive aggressive? And when he snaps his eyes from his desk straight to your own confused gaze, you can almost sense a bit of something else in them compared to usual. 
Not anger. Not disappointment. 
He looks worried.
“Eleven days–” Sunghoon drones on with an exhausted tone, cutting himself off with another breath that shows you were right to assume his current displayed emotion. “You have ignored my text messages for eleven days.” 
You’re shocked by that because as far as you’re concerned, he has not texted you.
“What are you–” You furrow your brows at him, frantically pulling out your phone. “You haven’t texted me. See? The last one I got was–” You take a second as you pull up his texts and remember the exact time he texted you. So late into the night, right after…that. Naturally, you silence yourself, afraid to say it out loud.
“On the contrary,” Sunghoon denies your proof. “I texted from my personal phone.”
You hesitate again, looking down and noting the notifications under the tab of  “message requests.” To be fucking fair though, you didn’t even know that existed so you never really paid attention to it. Especially as you practically avoided your phone out of fear that he’d be texting you again. 
You were thankful he didn’t. That comforted you. Now though? Your comfort is replaced yet again with anxiety because, well, he texted you consistently after that night.
“Oh–” You say quietly, seeing a glimpse of “Please, let me call y–” in one of the messages.
“I didn’t see those.” Quickly, you turn your screen off and shove your phone back into your pocket, nervously clasping your hands in front of you and looking to the floor. 
“I will reiterate then.” 
You can hear the leather on his chair squeak against his expensive suit when he leans forward, both hands splayed out on his desk in a wide and intimidating stance in front of you. 
“Wait–” You look around the office now. “If you’re going to fire me– shouldn’t the others be here too?”
Sunghoon pulls back at that, narrowing his eyes before lending a very small and even more nervous chuckle.
“I’m not firing you. I told them I’d take care of your sudden and, quite frankly, unhelpful vacation.” 
You look to the floor again, feeling scolded for your actions but having a genuine reason. If Sunghoon truly is aware of that reason for your absence, he understands too, right?
“I have been beyond inappropriate with you.” He blurts now, that same leather squeaking as he leans back again and looks away from you the moment you snap your head up. “I have reason to believe you’ve not yet reported me, and I’d like to ask for the opportunity to explain myself before you do.” 
You feel a chill wash over your whole body, cold sweat peaking right at your temples as you stare forward. He’s being so professional about this, and that lie you’ve convinced yourself of is showing it’s face as just that, a fucking lie.
So this is it? 
So there it is? A semi-admittance that it was him? That little feeling in the back of your head that wishes it was diminishes within an instant. In fact, you narrow your eyes at him, your nose crinkles, and you feel frustration bubble up in your gut.
“So you admit that it was you?” You ask, needing a full confirmation. 
“Yes.” Sunghoon sighs, leaning back somehow further, creating as much distance from you as possible before unintentionally rolling his eyes. Mostly due to the fact that he was stupid enough to let this happen, mostly to shame himself. “What I did was inappropriate and unacceptable. I didn’t intend for this to ever happen.”
Now you feel a bit…pissed off.
Like? Oh, he didn’t intend for this to happen? What? You mean he didn’t intend to let you fucking find out! Well, as good as he is at playing the part of a slutty man on the internet, he’s not so good at acting in real life, now is he? Saying your false fucking name at work, saying your real name with his cock out?
What in the fuck are you supposed to do about this? Why is he giving you the ability to report him? He’s the one with the power here. He could fire you now and bury the information if he so pleased. After all, He’s besties with COO Lee, right? That bitch in HR has an obsession with him too. Hell, everyone here loves the guy. 
You’re just a bottom of the barrel employee trying to work your way up. If you got him fired, surely he’d make damn sure you never work for a decent company like this one again. Additionally, you don’t even want to report him.
Yeah, it was fucking weird that he just knew it was you and kept going. Super strange that he had to have known after the first call, only to ask to see you in the second one. Why does that turn you on in the midst of this anxiety induced spiral? Why the fuck is the idea of Park Sunghoon apologizing for masturbating to and for you so alluring?! 
Sure, maybe it’s kind of nice knowing that someone of his status would ever find an interest in you, but it doesn’t quite wash the frustration away. You have every right to question, and every right to be pissed off about it. 
Still, in this quiet room, Sunghoon is stoic and all you can think about when you look at him is the way he said “if I were your boss i’d–” and the way he fucked his palm while saying it, implying he wanted it to be you while simultaneously knowing it was you watching. 
Since fucking when did Mr. Park ever show a sexual interest in you? And if he did, why the fuck couldn’t he have just been normal about it?
“That was really fucked up, you know that?” You argue immediately, voice shaking at the speed of which your emotions shift. Your resolve isn’t quite as clear as it probably should be. Perhaps you should report him, or maybe you already should have. But, it’s not like you accepted the truth until he demanded it of you.
You would have let it slide. Both of you could have pretended it never happened. You could’ve gone home and continued working, never paying a cam-boy again had Sunghoon not called you into this stupid, comfortable ass office. 
“In my defense, I was just doing my job. Though it’s my own fault for not telling you, my job here was at risk if you had found out.”
“You made me talk about you.” You roll your eyes at him now, gaining the power and control over the conversation. “And you thought I wouldn’t find out?! What? Did that get you off or something?”
“I–” Sunghoon stops himself from answering that question truthfully. He quickly tries to explain away the stutter instead. Never has he been scolded by an employee, but you’re well within your rights to do so. “I wasn’t in my right mind. I never get called by name during these sessions and I apologize for having you say it.”
“And you want me to report you?” You raise a brow at him. “Want me to just storm right into HR and tell her how you’re a fucking pervert? Want me to tell her how you told me to repeat your name? To thank you for it? Is that really what you want?” 
Are you enjoying yourself a little too much? Maybe.
Sunghoon doesn’t respond though, instead, he runs his hand through his hair and sighs from the stress welling up inside of him. He can only act calm and collected for so long, and it’s been eleven days already. He hates how hearing you say those words goes straight to his cock at a time like this, he hates even more how all of this could have been avoided if he had simply declined your second call. 
But you’re not wrong. He is a pervert, and he did tell you to thank him for the pleasure you were getting from his voice and half image alone. At the time, he was so turned on he really just couldn’t help himself. You fed his sexual appetite unknowingly and now this is the consequence of his action. Being a known pervert.
Is it what he wants though? To be reported? Humiliated?
Fuck.
Arguably, just having you humiliate him like this is enough. Drives him crazy, really. Whether it be from arousal or guilt, or both. 
And for the first time since you started working here, you see him for what he truly is. A strong man to an extent, but he’s crumbling under his own mistake and it makes you wonder just how far he would’ve taken it had you not found out. 
“And what if I didn’t realize who I was fucking myself for?” You glare. “Would you have asked for more? Avoided me here even more? Would you have declined my application for the assistant position because you can’t come to terms with the fact that you’re a fucking pervert?!”
Sunghoon raises his hands in defense. 
“Please–” His voice sounds panicked. “Please, keep your voice down.”
“Answer the question, then. Just fucking own it at this point.” You throw your arms up now, letting them fall back down in a slap to your thighs. “Would you have made my work-life miserable just so you could watch me get off to you? Knowing the whole time? Would you have kept on with that boss slash employee shit just so it felt more real for you?” 
Staring forward at him, you watch him accept that everything you’re saying is likely exactly what would have happened. Maybe he really will try to own it. Which would be… a good thing if you decide to let your own resolve falter.
So fucking secretive, huh? An actual, real life degenerate? And it’s Sunghoon of all people? 
“Maybe…” Sunghoon trails off, making himself seem much smaller than he usually is on a day-to-day basis. “I mean, No–I,”
Oh, he’s actually stuttering.
“And you want me to tell on you? You want me to fuck your life up?” You raise a brow. “As if I didn’t pay you to do it?”
In all honesty, aside from the anxiety and awkwardness, and despite never once thinking of Sunghoon too sexually, things have changed. Drastically. Especially after being confronted with this situation and he’s not intimidating you or using his power to control you. No, he’s giving you the power and quite frankly, you don’t know what to do with it. 
Are you basking in it? Absolutely. Is it nice to see him cower in front of you? In that big plush chair that costs more than your monthly income? Hell yeah.
But goddamn, had he approached you before all of this and asked for a date, or showed interest, you would have gladly partaken in a secret romance with him. He’s intelligent, attractive, clean, and has money. It’s not like you ever expected the guy to go home and fuck himself on camera. 
You never thought he was the type to be so lonely either. Or so desperate, judging by how he acted during those two sessions. Arguably, you always wondered why there was never a ring on those pristine fingers. 
And while you were definitely the victim in this situation, you feel more embarrassed than you do violated. Many nights you thought of how he spoke, how he said how badly he wanted you. It’s embarrassing because you’re starting to love the idea of who those words really came from. The Park Sunghoon, so untouchable in the business world. So untouchable by women and men solely because he appears to be too expensive, too pristine.
But you…
You’ve seen him dirty. 
Part of you wishes you didn’t pay to be humiliated like this. The rest of you wishes you didn’t fucking like it as much as you do.
“It’s only fair.” Sunghoon explains with a short breath. “I feel awful for what I’ve done, and I should have told you the moment I recognized her as, well–” He pauses with a pained face, as if he hates hearing himself say it. “You.”
“Then, why didn’t you?” You raise your brow again, nearly forgetting you’re at work, solely focused on the conversation at hand and feeling relieved at the way it’s going.
Sunghoon shifts in discomfort, looking away from you.
“Do you want honesty?” He asks in a quiet voice, leaning forward on his desk but refusing eye contact. He keeps his gaze lowered the entire time, his voice small and shaky. 
There’s still people in the office, though his door is closed and it’s unlikely he can be heard.
You nod to him with an even smaller “Go on then.”
“I tried to convince myself that it wasn’t you.” He says, shifting his hands and picking at his cuticles. 
Man, he really knows how to act sorry, doesn’t he?
“I avoided you after that first call, solely because I think I wanted her to be you. Which is…incredibly inappropriate.” 
He looks up at you now, searching for a reaction and only seeing you nod at him. His eyes shift right back down as he continues. 
“My avoiding you led you to– um– more services.” He explains quieter, admitting in full the situation he’s allowed to take place, seeming more and more insecure with his words than he ever has before. “I can admit that I have fantasies and needs.” 
Silence. 
“After that first call, I couldn’t help but be entirely attracted to you. The idea of–”
You suddenly find yourself thinking back to all of those things he said to you again, parading as if he wasn’t your boss, telling you what he'd do if he were. He seems to have accidentally found a sexual interest in the dynamic…and he fucking dragged you into it with him. 
“Mr. Par– Sunghoon.” You cut him off, actually feeling a bit of pity now at his admittance. 
His words make you feel like maybe he’s not entirely just a pervert who was intending to make you get off to him from the start. If anything, he probably felt uncomfortable at first knowing who was on the other end of the call. It’s the fact that his real life job was at risk if you found out, and still he indulged despite that. He accepted that second call, he asked for more, he acted like he really does want you.
 To the extent that losing his job was in the front of his mind and he still did it. He ignored the danger of it and prioritized getting off…with you. You find yourself wondering if this would have happened to any other employee under him if they happened to stumble across his stream too. 
Part of you wants to pretend he wouldn’t, because the idea that all of this is happening solely because it was you? It hits a little too hard, a little too deep. 
“Okay, okay. Stop,” You say, keeping your eyes on him and willing him to look up at you. “You don’t have to keep explaining, I get it.”
“No.” He does meet your eye this time, stopping your brain of all thoughts at how differently you see him now versus all the times before. “I do.” 
He’s so honest. Probably too honest for his own good. Maybe that’s why he’s so good at his job, maybe that’s why everyone loves him. Maybe a bit of lying would help him in this situation if it were anyone else, but for you? 
You kind of enjoy the way he’s telling the truth. Admitting that he was desperate, apologizing for wanting you even if just for a brief moment.
“I asked you to turn on your camera for selfish reasons. I asked you to say my name, then I made the mistake of exposing myself because I–” He hesitates, closing his eyes and breathing in deeply through his nose. “I struggled to pretend it wasn’t me, and that she wasn’t you. I very well knew what I was doing, and at the time, I wished that you did too.”
More silence as you stare at him, stunned, slightly in awe. 
“But I knew you wouldn’t have reciprocated. What I’ve done is criminal, and I am encouraging you to report me for it if that’s what you deem necessary.” 
“And if I don’t?” You don’t leave any more room for silence now, feeling desired and validated. 
You can’t pretend that you’re mad, though you were previously. You simply can’t pretend that, now at least, you wouldn’t reciprocate. If anything, you’re more interested now than you think you ever would have been before. 
“We can forget any of this ever happened. I’ll stop streaming and accepting private calls, and we can hopefully move forward without any ill-feelings of one another.” He blinks at you, near pleading with his eyes. “I’ll push your application through– That is, if you still want the position.” 
Sunghoon does wince at the bribe, considering he’s never done such a thing let alone commit acts of sexual harassment, or perhaps even non consensual foreplay with someone. It really really wasn’t entirely intentional, and he’s disgusted with himself. If you report him, he’d take the hit to his reputation and career, but if you don’t…what then?
Ill-feelings, he says? If anything, you might feel more ill parading around like you wouldn’t want him to do all of those things he said previously, with free-will to say as he pleased without the fear of you knowing who the words were coming from. 
“Can you please stop with the professional talk?” You hum out with an exhausted eye roll.  “I don’t want the promotion if you’re just offering it so I don’t rat you out.” You narrow your eyes now and lean yourself forward. “You hope to forget this ever happened? Really?” 
Carefully, the two of you watch each other for a while longer. Sunghoon looking like he’s about to catch himself on fire, and you, looking annoyed and amused. Still, the thick air in the room starts to feel suffocating under the pressure of the “issue” at hand as you scold him further. 
“What you did was predatory. But– I don’t want to ruin your life over this.” 
You watch as Sunghoon listens, his posture opening up a bit more as you speak, showing that he’s being relieved of his stress through your words alone. 
“Are you trying to hold a promotion over my head over this?”
Before he gets the chance to curl in on himself again, you answer for him. 
“Maybe.” 
You continue too, not letting him speak for the time being. Or, rather, giving him a chance to breathe. 
“Should you change your username and continue doing what you want behind closed doors because it’s no one else’s business?” You really watch him this time. “Yes.” 
He blinks at you, raising a brow in slight confusion. 
“Did you take advantage of me?”
He nods before you whisper out another “yes” yourself. 
“Would I let you do it again…?”
Oh, for Sunghoon, it’s hard to breathe right now as he anticipates what you’ll say. Is it going to be a ‘no’ this time? Are you going to stand up and change your mind? Despite just stating you don’t want to ruin his life?
God, hasn’t he already let you?
“Yes.”
Pause. 
“I’m sorry?” Sunghoon responds in disbelief, shifting his eyes to his hands and then back to you. “Come again?”
“Sunghoon.” You make it a point to call him by his name now, ignoring the etiquette of a proper boss and employee dynamic. “I am humiliated by all of this but I can see that you are too. You’ve admitted your guilt and even go as far as encouraging that I report you.” You pause again, knowing that this isn’t where the conversation should be going for any, uh, normal person, you suppose. 
“If you had just told me. If you had said anything about wanting to, like, fuck me, I would have done it with or without the promotion on the line.”
Does that make you sound a little desperate? Yeah. But it’s not like he doesn’t know how badly you need to be fucked. After all, you know, the cam sessions and stuff. You were literally paying a stranger to get you off. 
Shouldn’t he, of all people, know that you were bad-off enough to get laid?
Sunghoon’s issue though, is that he never looks at his employees sexually. No matter how pretty, no matter how much they flaunt themselves at him. He never has, and probably never will again. If it hadn’t been for that single first session with you, all would be well. But now? He’s too attracted to you. 
He wants you so badly.
“If you tell me right now that you want me, in the same way you did on that call–” You stop yourself to really look at him. With the way he swallows, the way his lips slightly part, the way his hands show signs of eleven days worth of nervous habit cuticle picking. “If you do all of those things you said you’d do ‘if you were my boss’...”
“Wait, wait–” Sunghoon stands in a rush, causing you to jump slightly at the sudden sound echoing off of the walls in the office. “Do you understand the consequences of what you’re implying right now?”
“If I fuck my boss, we could both be fired?” You smile, feeling the confidence raise within you. Watching the way he reacts to your lewd words face to face rather than through a microphone. 
“That would be…correct.” He raises a brow. 
“Well, technically, you’ve already been fucking me.” You look away from him, feeling a bit shy even with the confidence, but never having spoken to a man so bluntly before like this? It’s a bit scary. “Would it really make anything worse if, you know, I do reciprocate?”
Goddamn. Sunghoon might be a bit smitten. This situation could have gone a thousand different ways, and you offer the one that includes your legs spread across this fucking desk and his face buried between them?
Oh. Never has he been so willingly turned on at work. 
“Is this what you want?” He asks in a breath, shifting his eyes to the door and walking towards it, immediately reaching for the lock but not quite turning it. 
“Is that what you want?” You counter, turning and staring at the lock. 
Sunghoon hides his nod, wanting you to be the one to answer first. After all, hasn’t he been self-indulgent enough?
“Do you want me to fuck you?” He finally breaks and says it, blatantly, not sugar coated, yet still sweet when the words hit your ears. “After all this, you still want it?” 
You nod, dipping your head a bit against your shoulder. 
Click. 
“I guess I should have known.” Sunghoon plays with his words now, hand dropping from the now locked door and eyes entirely on you. “Do you want me to fuck you, or would you prefer–”
“You.” You smile, feeling your skin prickle at the electricity that enters the room through breath and words alone. It’s the way he already shifted. Like all of that anxiety melted out of him within an instant. 
“No, no.” He stalks towards you now, the nervous Sunghoon is no longer in sight as he makes himself seem bigger, taller, far more intimidating. Just like he was on camera. “The me you saw on screen is not the same as what you’re seeing right now.” He tries to explain. 
“Oh?” You tilt your head, and he only finds that cute. 
Far too cute. 
“You’d do as I ask, right?” His voice shifts to a raspy whisper as he centers himself in front of you, both hands reaching the arms of your chair as he hovers above you. “I’m far more tame online.” 
Tame?! That’s what he calls tame?! 
You stare up at him, keeping your jaw from falling slack as you physically see him shift from being your boss into being a man with a need. Not just any need either. A need for you.
Part of you wonders if he ever truly felt bad in the first place about all of this, because the shift from just moments ago is so dramatic it’s almost scary. 
“So, tell me.” He leans down, inches from your face as his eyes start to fall to a half-lidded stare at you. “You’ll do as I say? You’d let me do it all for you, and not ask me to stop until I feel it best, yes?”
You swallow and slowly nod. Oh god, it really, really, is him. 
“And while at work, you’ll behave?” He continues, lips now ghosting over yours to the point you can almost feel them press down. He’s implying that if you don’t tell, that this won’t be the only time too? Shit. He’s entirely aware of why this shouldn’t be happening, but still making it happen.
 “No matter what I do to you, where or how I do it, you’ll behave?”
You can’t help it when you lift your chin, just a bit to rest your lips against his words, eyes falling closed and hands hesitant to reach out for his perfectly ironed shirt. 
You feel his smile against your lips, with that sharp-toothed grin he rarely offers. 
“Ah, so it’s true.” He murmurs against you, his hand reaching for yours and guiding it for you, straight to his belt. “Dirty, dirty girl.”
A small, pleased, sound leaves your throat when he does kiss you, adding his own pleased hum alongside yours as his hands still hold yours in place over his belt, not quite letting you do anything just yet.
”Gonna be quiet–” He whispers into your mouth, just against your tongue before licking out and against it. “Even when I tell you to moan my name?”
You really shouldn’t be surprised, but you still are. You like this Sunghoon better than the one who stutters and picks his cuticles. He’s owning it, and in a way, so are you. 
 After all, it wasn’t until today that you truly learned what Sunghoon is like when he’s aroused. Not that you ever should have known in the first place. The fact that you do know, the fact that he’s showing you? It just makes this all the more arousing, in your opinion.
All he needed was a green light and within seconds it seems, Sunghoon became the need you’ve been chasing for months now through porn sites and erotic novels. 
You nod to his words, trying to drop your hand just a bit to feel what you’ve already seen. Just to feel how warm he is, how—
“Is that so?” Sunghoon whispers in an amused tone, guiding your hand right back to his belt, only to drop his other hand straight between your legs. “You’re supposed to do as I say. If I tell you to moan my name, you do it.”
Oh, the sexual confusion of what to do and which Sunghoon to obey. All you can do is continue to nod for him, hanging your head with a breath at the way he cups his hand over the entirety of your core. You wore pants today in order to hide your shame, to try and feel invisible based on previous circumstances. You’re not so happy about that now, as you try to feel his touch through the thick fabric only to shamelessly thrust your hips up and against his palm.
He moves his lips to the top of your head now, hovering over you in a perfect stance of power, hand gently rubbing up and and down despite your hips asking for a harsher touch. If anything, it makes him feel better knowing how you react to this. 
In actuality, his relief is sending his arousal through the roof. Not only are you not going to rat him out but…you want more of it? More of him, in particular? Not the facade of him online? 
At this point, if he gets caught, you’re both going down in flames. So, why not enjoy the ride?
Truly, it’s laughable in the way he’s just as amused as he is turned on, relishing in the fact that he wants you and you’re letting him have you despite his past actions. You’re messy too, he’s seen it, and now he gets to feel it. 
“Mhm,” Sunghoon hums against the top of your head, now pressing his own hips forward against your hand. “Feel that?”
The electricity? How hard he is? How needy you are?
”Yeah…” You sigh absentmindedly, bumping his chin with your head when you try to look up at him. You only blink twice before he coos out with a sad little sound. 
He doesn’t say a word after as he removes his hand and instead, grabs both of your hands and places them on his shirt. 
“Go on.” He smiles, waiting to see you to start fumbling against his buttons. 
And fumble, you do. Touching him, for some reason, feels so dangerous. Knowing you’re the one removing his shirt, watching his skin be revealed as it begins to fall open by your own doing? It’s electrifying. Enough to lose your train of thought as you study how toned and smooth his skin is. Just like how you had seen on camera, so clear in front of you now. You’re aching for him by this point, being able to feel his body heat, touch him, feel his eyes on you. 
If you had really known back then who it was you were talking to, you very well may have pretended to not know as well, judging by the way your entire body catches fire for him. 
And as his shirt falls completely open, he’s satisfied with the way you do it. Complacent and docile beneath him, nervous fingers shaking much like he did for the past eleven days. With those pretty eyes looking at him, like there’s nothing in your head at all. 
He chuckles at you, grabbing your hands again and placing them right on his chest, helping your hesitant touch to massage and caress each bump and toned muscle. He intentionally flexes the further down your hands go, all the way back to his belt. 
There, he looks down at where you touch, then back at you with a quirked brow. You stare  up at him, blinking, face feeling hot, and it’s like you move your hands on instinct. The sound of his buckle being unclasped echoes in the room, and his eyes only darken with the sound.
The sound of it slipping from the loops when he takes it upon himself to remove it completely for you, the sound of his breathing, the sound of that zipper, the button, the shuffling of his pants being skewed down just enough to fit your hand inside.
He moans at the image alone, loving the way your smaller hand looks slipping down his pants, the way your breathing is somehow even as if you’re trying to keep yourself calm. So calm, so pretty, but he knows how needy you are. He shouldn’t, but he does, and he uses it to his advantage. 
You’re the one who moans this time upon feeling that little twitch of his cock urging you to grab. And he helps you too, with the way he guides your hand under the front of his pants further, forcing your fingers to grab and grope the thick of his cock, uncomfortable and pressing between his briefs and undone zipper. 
“Still, you’re just looking.” Sunghoon comments, pressing his hips forward slowly and gently. “I’m right here.” He continues to explain the situation to you, as if you’re not experiencing it. “You need me to show you how to touch me too?”
You hesitate with a groan caught in your throat. You’re still processing the size difference that you feel now versus what you saw. Bigger. Thicker. Heavier than you would have expected against your palm. Honestly, you were so focused on the fact that Sunghoon’s cock is currently fucking forward against you that you almost forgot how to jerk a man off by yourself. 
His hand had been doing all the work for you, and you’re quick to take over. 
Sunghoon lends a very small gasp at the way you try to grasp, and instantly both of his arms shoot to the chair behind your head. He grips it, dropping his chin to the top of your head before thrusting a bit harsher into the grip you try to hold on him. 
“Harder.” He exhales, his cock twitching in your weak hold. “Grab me harder.”
You do, squeezing the bulge before intentionally adjusting it for him, allowing the head of his bulbous cock to peek from the top of his briefs. 
His relieved sigh is enough, you can’t help it. With his chin sat atop your head like this, you have no choice but to watch the way he moves his hips. Just like he did on camera. His abs flex with each movement, his arms grip behind you on the chair tighter, and you couldn’t pull your eyes away from his desperate body even if you wanted to. 
You thrust up too, as if your body craves what you’re already touching. And you do crave it, so much so that your clit aches against the denim you’re rubbing up against. Unfortunate that you wore these fucking jeans, honestly.
“Mr. Park–” You let out a small and frustrated cry, using your other hand to try and fail at unbuttoning your own pants. 
He hides his smile at the way you’ve reverted back to his professional title, but pays no mind to it because that’s what he wanted to hear in your voice that night. A desperate sound of his name, a plea, a cry. He can’t help but cling to it and bury that pretty voice into the darkest parts of his brain. A memory he’ll revisit time and time again after this. That sound, those pretty lips, this weak grasp you have. For the time being, it’s his. You belong to him right now. 
“Hm?” He hums out, fucking his hips forward while tilting his head back to look at you. “What is it, baby?”
Oh. You lost your train of thought. 
Thankfully, he seems to do the thinking for you as he shifts his eyes down and watches you try to both please him and remove your own pants. A cute sight to him, really. Someone who was just scolding him for wanting this, fumbling for more? 
So cute. 
He chuckles, pulling his hips back from your hand and grabbing it, unbothered by the loss of your touch. Instantly he intertwines his fingers with yours, and grasps your other hand from your pants to do the same. Both your arms raise by his guidance to the back of the chair before he releases them. 
You watch with a slack jaw and half-lidded eyes as he lowers himself, right onto his knees before he unbuttons your pants for you and very politely pulls them from your legs. 
“This what you want?” He smiles, lying his cheek right against your exposed thigh and taking a deep inhale. It’s taking everything in him not to fawn over the woman who had him in his thoughts for the past however long, truly. 
Then again, he’s weak. He doesn’t even look up at you through his words and, instead, nuzzles his nose right up and against the seat of your panties before inhaling with a pleasant hum. “To have me finally touching this pretty pussy for you?” 
God damn, if you didn’t already know it was him on that camera, you do now. He speaks the same type of words, with the same confidence, the same sultry tone…
You can barely comprehend the way he slowly takes his own pants off because you’re too focused on the way he runs his lips across your skin with dirty thoughts spilling from them. Fingers tucked under either side of your panties in preparation before he eventually pulls them off of you. 
“Did you wear those pants to hide yourself from me?” He comments now with an amused tone. “Knowing you wanted me to take them off of you anyway?”
You shake your head at him, holding your breath. You did wear them to hide, but you never would have expected this situation to go in a direction involving his mouth anywhere near where you need it. Sure, you assumed he would have rejected you, you assumed that if it was him– he’d have been so disgusted with himself that he’d only gag at your presence. 
But no. You were bold in your words, and he seems to feed into that. 
“No?” He furrows his brows and lifts his head. Now lowering your panties much like he did for your pants. He’s quick with his next action, seemingly hiding his own desperation through playful comments at you. “Why not?” He adds, instantly pressing his thumb against your clit and fucking shining his eyes up at you with a semi-pouted mouth. 
You roll your eyes back at the sudden pressure, relaxing your shoulders and slouching down in the chair. Your legs spread further on instinct, granting him a full view of your sticky cunt parting open for him.
His eyes glance down, peering into the heat you offered once before ever knowing it was him looking. Clicking his tongue, he can’t help but bite his lower lip to hold himself back. He hopes you don’t notice the way his hand finds its way to his own cock, he really, really hopes you don’t see him act so pathetic over this. 
But you do. The moment your eyes roll back into place and get a look at him. One of his shoulders is moving, but the action is hidden by not only the chair, but his fucking face. He’s got his lips parted and he’s licking his lower lip. Slicking it up with his own saliva before–
“So quiet,” He hums with glistening lips, lending himself a light hold with his cock and pretending it’s you doing it for him. “You have nothing to say for yourself?” He adds now, inhaling once more the scent of your slick dripping for him as he leans in just a bit more.
“Oh–!” You yelp slightly at the feeling of his teeth digging into the flesh just to the side of your core. He bites down harder and harder, licking the flesh between his teeth before sucking hard against it. The sweat and scent of your full-day at work does nothing to calm his raging cock. He loves it and it only grows his appetite for you. Licking, sucking, nibbling at the skin until he’s sure he’ll leave a nice, painful swell to rub against your panties later. Only then does he release your skin from his still-tasting mouth. 
The relief when he releases your thigh is short lived because he offers not even a full two seconds before you feel his mouth circle your clit. Like he can’t help himself, like he can’t tease you right now even if he wanted to. 
 A flick of his tongue sends a shiver down your spine straight to your toes and you can’t stop your legs from immediately wrapping around his head. You hear his muffled “mmf” when you do that, but he keeps you from apologizing for it because his free hand goes straight under your ass and scoots you even closer to his tongue. 
And if you didn’t already think Sunghoon knew how to use that mouth for more than just being a professional business man, you do now. With the way that same tongue that used to taste the morning coffee you’d bring him now tastes you. Deeply. 
He licks, flicks, and sucks every fold. Slurping up any dripping heat that slips out of you before pressing his tongue in and nuzzling his nose against your clit. He’s not quiet about it either. He moans with each lick, hums every time your legs squeeze around his neck, slurps and loudly sucks. 
It’s pornographic, it’s sexy, it’s–
Suddenly, you feel a sharp jolt shoot through you, having not even noticed his hand moving from your ass to your front, moving straight up under your shirt. His fingers immediately find your nipple and pinches hard. So hard that your previous moan only becomes prolonged. Grows louder, breathier. 
He pinches and massages your nipple with the intent to keep you loud for him. Office setting or not, he could give less of a shit about that right now. He ignores the strain on his wrist from your bra, he uses his other hand to grip himself harder, and you can’t help but squeeze him tighter between your thighs until you’re, quite literally, shaking.
Your hips are sliding against his face with each jolt of pleasure, practically riding him, and his cock is now entirely neglected because you can’t help but want more. You need more. And he gives it, by now releasing himself and keeping both hands on you. One holding the outside of your thigh, almost pushing you to squeeze tighter, the other incessantly abusing your nipple. 
He chokes out a moan through his messy movements, never quite knowing where to put his hands solely because he wants to touch all of you. His cock is just fine being neglected, he thinks, as he realizes just how much pleasure he gets from feeling you wrap yourself around him like this. 
It feels better than jerking himself off. 
“Mr. P–” You sigh out, still not quite used to actually calling him his name, but the sound of it reminds you time and time again how wrong this situation is supposed to be. 
You’re sitting on this soft chair, pussy being spread apart by a tongue none other than the man who signs your paychecks. And just this morning you were terrified of him ever even getting a glimpse of you without pants on? God, how stupid could you be? You should’ve been chasing this man’s touch since the day you looked at him for the first time. 
“Fuck–” You moan out for him, brain spitting thoughts at you as each second passes. The danger of this, the fact that he genuinely got off to you before you knew it was him. The secrecy of his perverted thoughts and actions…it’s all so… “So, you’re so – hot.”
You feel him laugh, kissing the pulsing hole of your pussy when he pulls his tongue back to swallow. And for just a few moments, he turns his head, gripping your thigh with his teeth once again before speaking back to you, muffled by the hot skin. 
“Yeah?” He laughs, now pulling his hand from your bra and lifting to your chin, pointing your gaze down at him, forcing you to see the way your thighs nearly suffocate him against your pussy. “Then keep your eyes on me.”
And you do, especially when he uses both of his hands now, nudging them between your legs and forcing them from his shoulders. He rests your legs on the arms of the chair instead and flicks his eyes up at you. 
“You watching?” He makes this a point, blowing a small breath of air straight at your clit before receiving a dazed and slow nod from you. “Keep your legs open too.”
That’s the last thing he says before his mouth is full again, sucking your folds between his teeth before tucking his tongue right back into your hole. He tastes for just a few moments before you feel those same lips on your clit. He lets it throb in his open mouth as he listens carefully to your little sounds, especially now that he’s sliding his fingers into you. 
You gasp, holding your breath at the feeling. His fingers slide in, reaching deep before he scissors them open. And all you feel from it is pleasure. You can’t help that your eyes roll back again, but you do try to keep your gaze fixed on his. With his eyes so rounded, blinking up at you with his strong jaw moving with each swallow of his own muffled moans. 
He sucks your clit, fucks your cunt open, and relishes in the way he will soon get to splay you across his desk and really let you have it. 
And he does this for a few minutes, though in your head it goes by so fast that you nearly get whiplash from the way he pulls back with a wet sound and grins at you.
“Aw, baby–” He coos at the face you make, seemingly disappointed to lose all stimulation at once, but he’s quick to lift to his feet and lean back over you. 
Oh, his cock. It’s right there. 
Oh.
His face– 
“You’re so fucking wet right now.” He murmurs against the corner of your mouth with a raspy whisper, easily and without warning slipping two of his fingers right back into the heat that he just denied himself of licking more. “You hear that?” He continues with a sharp toothed bite to your lip. “How wet you are?”
You groan at the way he slams his fingers in, out, in, out, in…He keeps them there, pressed so far into you that you can physically feel the way your pussy tries to push him out again.
“Could slip it in right now–” He moans out at how tight you clench just his fingers. “Fuck, could be so deep in you.”
Your face feels hot as a bashful feeling overtakes you. His voice hits so much harder when you feel his breath along with it. His fingers, his cock right up against you. You want him to slip it in. To stuff his cock in you so fast, no room to adjust, not a second to even catch your breath. 
God, you need it right now. It’s been too long since you’ve felt a real person touch you, you can’t help that you feel so desperate. The clench isn’t on purpose, your body tells him all he needs to know, all while he tells you all you could only wish to hear fall from someone’s lips.
And not just anyone. His lips. 
You shoot your arms around his neck and it's not really intentional but– an actual kiss. You need it. 
He seems pleased by it though, with the way his tongue immediately asks for more. One hand moves to brace your cheek, the other still fucking into you so good that you can’t keep a single moan down. He takes full control of the initiated kiss solely because you kissed him first. Almost hungrily, he licks into your mouth with his own muffled groan, encouraging you to keep being pretty like this. Just so you can see what he’ll do to you. 
And, damn. He guides your body like a puppet, stiffening his shoulders when he licks into your mouth and threatening to pull away by raising  himself up just a bit. He knew you’d chase the kiss, and you do. You lift with him, your ass lifting from the chair just to keep his tongue against yours, and he takes the elevated position and angles his hand just a bit. There, his fingers fuck into you harder, faster, so much fucking deeper until– you feel his fingers stop at a painfully deep spot inside of you. 
He pulls back from the kiss, looking down between your bodies, and your eyes follow his gaze. Right there, he’s placed his knee up against his own wrist, forcing his fingers to remain deep and unmoving in you. 
You take in a sharp inhale, seeing the way he lets your body fall back to the seat of the chair, only forcing him to skew his fingers and– “Oh, god!”
You moan out so suddenly that it even shocks him for a moment, but he takes your weakness and uses it to his advantage. Quickly, he licks into your moaning mouth, tickling his fingers upwards, pulling even more animalistic sounds from you. 
“Yeah?” He whispers frantically, so turned on by the way your entire body stiffens. “Right there?” He continues, leaning his full body weight forward with his knee, wincing at the way he presses his cock against anything he can find in the process, just to get you off right here, right now. 
You nod just as frantically, toes curling, arms shooting to the chair in a form that should appear as discomfort, but really you’re just bracing yourself through the tensing of your muscles before all of them relax and pulse at once. 
Your ears pop, but you can still hear your desperate cries of his name somewhere distant. You can even hear him, humming and encouraging your orgasm. You wish you could hold your eyes open to see him, to grab him and force him to fuck his fingers hard into you. God, you could take it right now. You could take just about anything to heighten this feeling of stars bursting behind your eyelids. 
Somehow though, it’s like he knows. Half-way through your orgasm, you feel the weight between your legs shift and his fingers start moving again. Still, your eyes are squeezed shut, and you can't help but to lunge forward and hug against his neck, clinging to him through the prolonged orgasm that his fingers alone have brought to you. 
“Squeezing me so tight–” Sunghoon groans, unsure of if he’s referring to the way your needy cunt crowds his fingers, or the way you cling to him like a lost pet, begging for him to never leave your sight. “Fuck, you’re so pretty like this.”
You hear those words over any of his others. So clear in your head as you snap your head up and look at him. You see him lower his gaze, but your grip doesn’t quite allow him to actually look down at you. Not when he has to physically hold you up anyway. Still, he looks amused up there, knowing that single compliment must’ve hit somewhere inside of you.
You’re not sure why, through all this, Sunghoon calling you pretty makes it so much more intimate. And even as your legs continue to shake, and you release your death grip hug on him, he keeps himself crowded up to you. He’s somehow out of breath just like you are, relishing in the calm silence of your post orgasm as he…Jesus.
It’s not just your imagination. Somehow, it is intimate. It’s the way he pulls his fingers out and both hands shoot to your face. First, he kisses you as if you’re a long lost love. Deeply, slowly. Then, he’s putting one hand at the small of your back, nudging his knee right back between your legs, and pulling you right up against him. 
“Who did you cum for?” Sunghoon asks, pulling back just to lick against your lips and stare directly down at you. “Say my name.”
You don’t hesitate, echoing out with a winced expression, still so out of breath while rubbing your clit to the expanse of his thigh. 
“Su-Sunghoo-Sunghoon-” 
“Yeah?” He encourages you, hearing his name heat his ears up. He moves his pussy-slicked fingers to your mouth while you cry his name, and easily presses your tongue down with them, sliding the digits further and further down your throat. “Sunghoon.” He says his own name. “Say it again.”
You gag around his fingers, unable to obey his demand. 
“Sung–” He inspects the way your tongue struggles against the intrusion in your mouth. “Hoon.” 
You swallow around them now, sputtering, tears now running down the outer apples of your cheeks. He watches you do it too, wondering how good that would feel if it were his cock you’re swallowing around. Knowing you’d probably do it for him if he wanted to right now. 
But…he needs more than that. Despite how delicious you look while gagging, his cock has been neglected and he needs to fuck out the stress from the past however long you’ve been avoiding him. It’s like his brain breaks with the action as he watches you take his fingers in whatever way he offers. You let him do whatever he wants. You’re obeying. 
“Up.” He suddenly says, pulling all physical contact with you away as he turns, steps out of the pants restricting his ankles, and swipes every pen, file, and picture frame off his desk. “Come here, baby.”
You feel like you’re melted to this chair right now, in all honesty. You’re still trying to catch your breath just from touching his cock before he decided to make you see fucking stars, to think you can stand right now is insane.
So, when you don’t immediately hop up and throw yourself onto his desk, he turns to look at you. 
You’re splayed out, legs still spread, toes still curled. Your chest is heaving to breathe, eyes wild and lips so fucking kissable. 
“Oh, fuck.” He sighs to himself in realization, relishing in the image of you he’s only recently been craving. “Look at you.”
You lift your arm to hide your face, feeling apologetic for the way you’ve lost the ability to exist as an active participant right now. Even more apologetic when you glance down at how fucking hard his cock is. Raging hard, so pretty with the tip sputtering precum for god knows how long. 
He watches you stare, and lends you a few moments to catch your breath by gripping it himself. Leaning himself against his desk and twisting his wrist with a tight grip at the base. 
“Is this how you looked at me when I did this before?” He asks, flicking his wrist still with each drag. “So out of it, you look like such a mess, babe.”
You find yourself humming a confirmation to him as you watch, almost reverting back to who you were during that first session. Unseen, only heard, all while you got to see him pleasure himself to almost nothing. You gave him nothing. 
You’ve still only given him nothing. 
And so, very slowly, you force yourself to stand on shaking legs to take those two strides to his desk. Something inside of you tingles when he drops his cock and opens his arms for you, like a good boss would do in this situation. Supporting your unbalanced weight, letting you walk into his comforting grasp. 
“Said my name so pretty, you know.” He comments gently when he holds you close to him. Hands reaching down from the grip around your waist just to grab both of your fleshy ass checks and squeeze them. “You want more, yes?”
He’s quick to the point, only allowing the short and sweet moments to last just enough for them to stick in your head. Just enough to have questions about his actions. Just enough to give him anything, everything, he could want if it involves your body.
You nod almost shyly, dipping your head down and leaning against his chest. 
“Let's get this off of you then.” He smiles with a gentle voice, reaching to the hem of your shirt and pulling it straight up, watching how you lift your arms to help him. “Mhm–” He hums again, loving how the bra drags off of you along with the shirt. He lets both of his hands brush your nipples before he goes back to gripping your ass cheeks and spreading them. 
Spreading them so wide that, once again, you have to lift on your toes just to let him play with your body. Which, oh man. Always wearing his button down shirts, his blazers, his long-sleeve shirts. You can’t help it when you tug at the opened fabric of his shirt, asking silently that he shake it off. Wanting to see his arms, wanting to see the strength in them.
And he does it without hesitation, letting his hands fall from you just for a moment to shake his shirt off, only now hugging against you again and forcing a position change. He turns both of you so now you’re up against his desk, and he’s standing in front of you.
It’s easy for him to push you back in a kiss. Your legs open for him on instinct anyway, so he need not worry about prying those legs open again. You do just as expected when he pushes you too. Your ass hits the desk and you lift on your toes to sit on it. Your legs spread wider, making room for him to step even closer, cock right up against you when he closes any amount of distance, and still? He’s kissing you. 
All across your face, down your neck, back to your lips. And his hands just keep feeling. Massaging your tits, lending small taps to your ass, holding your chin, jaw, neck, and then…he runs them through your hair. 
The feeling is so good you almost forget how you’ve been trying to steal a glimpse of his flexing arms as he grabs at you. Goosebumps prickle and you let out a groan at the pleasure of it. He keeps one hand there now, smiling against his kiss to your ear. 
“You like being pampered?” He asks, now gripping a fist full of your hair and skewing your neck to the side. “Like being moved around like a puppet?”
Never once have you thought about your sex life that way, but when you think about it…maybe. After all, you did enjoy being told when and how to touch yourself, being allowed or forbidden from cumming. Now, with him quite literally moving you around with just a simple grip of your hair? Yeah. 
“By you–” You mutter out as you open your eyes, staring at the ceiling and feeling his tongue lap against your earlobe. 
“Just me?” He leans back, using that same grip in your hair to force you to look at him. “You’d give me that power?”
You nod against the grasp, lips falling open in a moan despite not being pleasured by anything aside from the stinging against your scalp as he pulls little hairs a bit too tightly. 
“You know–” Sunghoon starts now, pressing his hips forward, dropping his other hand to his cock and slapping it right against your weeping cunt. “If I had known you were this dirty...”He sighs out at the image in his head, thinking back to all those times he silently complimented you in his head. Back then, never would he have made comments about your legs out loud, or how your tits would look in certain shirts. Thinking back now, he’s always found you quite beautiful.
Quite fuckable, even. 
You listen to the silence waiting for him to continue, feeling the way he presses the hardened head of his length against your clit repeatedly. 
“I would have propped you up on this desk months ago,” He smiles now, leaning in real close to your ear as his grip in your hair loosens just a bit. “Could’ve had you moaning my name this whole time.”
Then, you feel it. The way he adjusts his weeping cock lower, prodding at your hole just a bit until his tip is entirely enveloped by your clenching walls. 
You swallow a moan and hold your breath, legs shooting around his waist and instinctively trying to force his hips to move forward, trying to force him to penetrate you deeper.
“Shh,” He coos out, holding his hips firm and not letting you control his movements. Then, he kisses just under your ear before peppering them all the way back to your lips. He doesn’t kiss you though, no, he chuckles at you for trying. Watching you let your tongue fall from your mouth, inspecting the way you’re entirely in tune for him right now. “You really want it, don’t you?” He whispers just above your lips. “Want me to fuck you right here, right now?”
You nod absentmindedly, legs still trying to force him to move, arms clinging under his biceps, head still forced into whatever position he keeps it in by the hair. 
“Please–Sunghoon.” You cry in a small voice, feeling as if you’re going insane by the feeling of his tip sitting comfortably in you. 
“You’re so cute.” He smiles, lending you another inch of his length before letting his hand fall from your hair. There, he grips your waist instead, letting a strained grunt fall from his own lips this time. He’s really trying to remain collected about this, and he’s unsure himself why he’s enjoying the act of teasing you like this. He feels like he’s teasing himself more than you right now, seeing as how it’s taking everything in him not to stuff his cock into you hard and fast. “So–so, fucking cute.”
You clench around the few inches in you and it appears that’s all he needed to break entirely. Is he controlling you, or are you controlling him? 
Honestly, who gives a fuck?
You feel his arms shake when he plants them at either side of you, pointing his cock straight into you and sliding in fully. There’s a groan from him that you want to hear so badly, but your own heart beat is thumping in your ears so loudly that you miss half of it. 
The stretch is delicious, and the fact that it’s Sunghoon doing this to you makes this all the more enjoyable. The man who you’ve seen day after day, now holding himself up on the desk you’ve signed papers on with and for him? All so he can angle his hips and shove his cock in? Just to let his arms frantically wrap around your waist? Just so he can scoot you forward on this desk, using your leaking slick to slide you back and forth in time with his hips? 
That groan you wanted to hear? He hasn’t stopped. He’s essentially, controlling the entire situation and when you half open your eyes to witness his face, you’re forced to roll your eyes back in a moan matching his. 
He’s fucking you so deeply right now that all you can do is moan, all you can do is forget the embarrassment, the victimization, the way he’s doing this to you despite the risk of reality crumbling. He could lose his job, you could lose yours, and yet still– he’s fucking you like he doesn’t care.
So, you choose not to care either in the form of grabbing his hair, forcing his head back, and attaching your lips right against his adams apple. You feel him swallow and breathe out a shocked sound, and then? You suck.
Intentionally, you suck, bite, and lick, harder and harder until there’s a deep purple mark there. He doesn’t even fight it, though you feel him try to move his head just to keep you from going too insane with it. You don’t care though, because still you feel his cock splitting you open, forcing you to adjust to him. 
“Ah,” Sunghoon lets out another breath with that familiar chuckle, “Marking me now?” 
You hum a confirmation as you move to a new spot on his neck, absolutely fucking marking him. Feeling devastated by the idea that he’d do this with any other employee. Or any other person in general. 
“Making me all yours, huh?” He continues with his cocky words, feeling the way your pussy clenches him tightly, dripping all over his desk. He’d let you make him yours, with or without the bruising from your mouth. 
“Mhm.” You hum pleasantly, letting out little yelps each time he slams into you. Letting out full moans each time his arms wrap around your waist tighter. 
You continue with the act, littering his pretty neck with your touch and loving how he just lets you. Knowing that he’ll show up at work tomorrow looking a bit tired, but glowing nonetheless, trying to hide all these marks with that tight-necked collar he likes to wear. 
“Whatever you want.” He breathes, letting his hips lose rhythm for just a moment as he feels his muscles tighten. “Fuck, you’re still so tight.” 
You feel like you’re on top of the world as he compliments you, to the point you’re not sure when you’ll cum because your whole body has seemingly been feeling euphoria anyway. Everything feels good, even if his cock reaches deep enough to cause little jolts of pain. The sound of the desk scooting back through the force of his hips is enough to make you take it. Enough to squeeze your legs around him tighter, enough to clench, enough to– forget what you’re doing and let yourself fall into it with him.
Your head falls back from his neck and you pant out little half-calls of his name with each thrust. Your legs loosen from around him too, but his grip on your waist only pushes you back on his desk. Until he’s leaning forward so hard with each thrust that suddenly your back meets the cold wood.
Sandwiched between him and his desk, he follows the action, his hands quickly moving from your waist to your tits, pushing them together just so he can nuzzle his face between them.
There, you look at him. You really look at him. 
What a messy, messy, man. Always so pristine during working hours, now looking so wrecked and out of it as he chases a pleasure that you hope only you can give to him. 
“Mr. Park–” You sigh out in a pleasant voice, watching the way he sucks your tit into his mouth before his eyes open wide just so he can look up at you through each thrust. “Harder.”
You can physically see the way his eyes darken when he pops off from your tit, hands now going back to the desk as he hovers over you and intentionally rolls his hips. 
You feel his cock loosen you up painfully before he intentionally fucks into you. Dragging all the way out, just to push forward in a deep and painful thrust. Over and over again, all while he’s staring straight into your eyes.
As you look up at him, you see the intent in his face. The way he wants to give you exactly what you want. Sweat shining from his cheeks, his neck littered with pretty colors. Oh, he’s actually heavenly when he fucks. 
Better than what you thought that guy on camera would have been. He’s not nonchalant like he was when he was performing. He’s entirely in tune with you and what you want. Like what you want is what he wants. 
You can tell he’s paying no mind to his own face or expression, blatantly putting all of his thoughts into how he’s pleasuring you, his eyes searching your face to tell him he’s doing well. To tell him you feel good, to tell him you’re close or–
“Fuck–” He sighs out, teeth tracing his bottom lip as he glances up, keeping pace with the way he’s been plunging into you. “I can’t keep looking at you,”
You smile, feeling dazed and far away. It feels like it’s just you and him. You’re not in his office, on a desk, or doing anything you shouldn’t be doing. 
“You hear me?” He drops his body weight on you again, letting his hips move freely as he chases and chases. “I’m so close.”
Oh. 
“Then look at me.” You huff out, now shooting a hand between his flexed abs and simply…touching your clit once.
 “Oh–shit.” 
It hits you so fast. Just a simple touch causes your pussy to clench Sunghoon so tightly that he mimics your sound. 
“Ah, fuck- fuck,” His voice sounds frantic as he tries to pull out, only to feel your legs shoot back around him. This time, he lets you force him to stay. He lets those legs of yours push him back in, so deep that he knows he can’t fight. “No, no–” He chokes out, uncaring if his hips show you that he’s lying with his words. “I’m cumming– I need to–”
“Stay!” You shake beneath him but your voice sounds pleading, pressing once more to your clit before letting it go. You clench him again, essentially letting your body finish him off. Letting those clenches squeeze him so tightly, making sure he couldn’t fathom ever wasting his cum. “Don’t pull out.”
He doesn’t. In fact, he presses impossibly deeper, trying to bury his cock into you to the point it even pains him. Arms shaking as he tries to hold himself up again, only to drop his lips to yours under his own weight. His hips are so tense between your legs, his cock is so stiff that you can feel each pumped release, and still you’re experiencing your own euphoria through it. 
To the point your toes are curling and you barely notice the way you leave welts across his back from your fingernails through the intense orgasm. To the point his slack lips against yours feel more natural than anything else. Not kissing, just close. So close that–
He kisses you. 
After it’s all said and done, he still kisses you breathlessly. Passionately almost, clinging to you as his cock twitches as it grows flaccid inside of you.
He doesn’t pull out, he just…kisses.
And as you lay against his wooden desk, body coming down from the pleasure you’ve felt more than once within the past hour, all you can do is let your brain think on its own. Without shame, without embarrassment or anxiety. 
You thought Sunghoon would have been in control the whole time. Teasing you, maybe even making this experience more painful than it needs to be. But no, he…
He’s soft. Gentle, almost. 
Only now do you recognize that as badly as he probably wants to appear harsh, like the confident man he is on camera, you think he needs something else. Not just power, not just money or control. Not even just fucking. 
You think…maybe, Sunghoon needs connection. 
Intimacy. 
And that’s proven when he does finally stand on his own buckled knees, pulling you up with him into a hug where he still kisses you. Up until he takes that shirt you unbuttoned and holds it between your legs, scratching the back of his neck with a shy glance at you. 
“Sorry for the mess.” He echoes in a meek voice, holding that shirt firm against you. “Guess I just couldn’t help myself.”
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
Days later, you find yourself in his bed. Which should have been expected probably. Still doesn’t change the fact that every few hours, you remind yourself the reality of the situation.
It’s not just any bed you’re in. It’s Sunghoon’s bed. 
“Oh, right. The promotion.” Sunghoon suddenly calls out mid-episode. 
You’ve been here with him all day. To the point neither of you bother to put on clothes now because you know the spark will come back at any given time and you’ll be all over each other again. Still, lazing in his bed with him on a Saturday afternoon is nice. 
“I’ve been a bit occupied but– the interviews for the assistant position has been pushed back a bit due to you not coming to work.  I was supposed to notify you when you got back, but you know, we had priorities–” 
Sunghoon sighs, embarrassed. It’s nice actually, seeing him in his natural element. Allowing you to see him as more than just the guy that wears a suit and tie every day at work. 
“Unrelated to us…doing this, but, you’re up for the interview. Just need to schedule it with me. If you still want to be my assistant, I mean.”
“Oh, I can only imagine what that could entail.”
Sunghoon seems offended by this remark as he pulls back with furrowed brows.
“Excuse me?”
“Did you fuck the last one too?” You give him a playful smile, prodding at his soft-skinned chest.
“Absolutely not?!” 
“You’re still gonna fuck me too though, right? Even if I’m constantly having to nag you for signatures and meetings?” 
Sunghoon stares at you before smiling. 
“Well, let's see if you get the job anyway. Rhonda from Marketing is applying too.”
You lend a half-joke gag at him. 
“Is it too forward to ask for special attention for the position along with a sexual favor?” You tread the thin line. “I’m half joking but wouldn’t it be like…normal for us to be seen around each other at work if I’m working a job that requires it?”
Sunghoon thinks hard.
“You’re really asking to fuck your way up the ladder?”
“Aren’t you the one who offered it so I wouldn’t tell your dirty little secret?” You narrow your eyes at him. “But no, I’m asking for the job I’ve been trying to earn for ages. Besides, I’d still fuck you anyway.”
“Fair.” Sunghoon thinks harder still. “Rhonda would probably find out too, if she were to get the position anyway, considering my assistants are often intertwined in my personal business as well.”
“Oh, I’m personal business now?”
“Babe, my hand has been on your tit for an hour now.” 
Well, he’s not wrong.
“Rhonda is really close with HR too…” You trail off, feeling a bit anxious. “I think she’d hold it over both of us if she found out.” 
“In all fairness, you’ve been considered for the job more than a few times the past few months. Rhonda only applied during your two week avoidance of me. The reason she’s even up for the position is because my boss thinks you’re too flaky.” 
Oh, so you have a chance with or without putting his dick in your mouth again?
“Who else has applied?”
“Confidential.” Sunghoon shrugs. “I still have to follow company rules even if we’re breaking a few of them right now. What I can tell you is, over fifteen other candidates have already been phased out by me personally.” 
You pause.
“Why?”
“Bad matches, mostly. Two of them have been caught talking shit about me through the company emails, and the others? Many outside applicants, all freshman college students with strict schedules.”
“Being my assistant is not an easy job, and even before all of this, you’ve practically been doing the job already, better than the current assistant I have.”
You damn fucking right you have.
“How many are still in the running?”
“Two.”
Oh, this job is soooooo yours. 
“Just, one more thing.” Sunghoon sighs. “If you get this job, we cannot be fucking in my office. No sexual stuff at work. We can take lunch together, or I’ll bring you home after work, but absolutely nothing at work.”
Oh, he thinks you want him that badly? 
“Who says I need to fuck you during work hours anyway? I know how to control myself.”
“It’s not you who I’m worried about.” Sunghoon looks away, biting the inside of his cheek.
“Yeah?” You smile. “You gonna be calling me into your office just to torture yourself?”
“Oh, absolutely.” 
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
pls remember to leave feedback and reblog! :D love you!
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cobaltperun · 2 days
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Her Wrath
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Wednesday Addams x Female Reader (Request)
Masterlist
A/N: So, the request was originally Jenna x Reader with Percy instead of Xavier, but I don’t do Jenna stories, so this was the alternative. Wednesday and R are dating, and R has epilepsy, also Wednesday is rather protective over R. Xavier, as jealous as he is, pulls a “prank”, causing an epileptic seizure. Hope you enjoy @delicateenemyjellyfish
Word count: 0.8k
You were sitting in the quad, waiting for Wednesday and Enid to have a lunch together, since Enid managed to rope Wednesday into coming with her to Jericho. How she managed to do that, you had no idea, but it was honestly impressive that she did it.
It was a nice day, cool, but not cold, perfect to just spend it together with your girlfriend and one of your best friends, you relaxed, closing your eyes and leaning back and enjoying the breeze hitting your face. Wednesday was going to complain the day was too nice, and that she’d prefer rain, and sure, rainy days had their perks, but you couldn’t agree with her on everything.
All of a sudden you could swear you were being flashed with a laser right to your face, and even with your eyes closed it irritated you. You tried to cover your eyes as you slowly opened them and tried to find out who was doing it, but all you could see was the laser, going on and off, disorienting you and making it difficult to figure out who was behind it. Still, even as dizzy as you were getting you could recognize the tall, slim figure and slightly longer hair. Xavier? Why? Was he that jealous that he would try to make you have a seizure?
You tried to tell him to stop, but the words wouldn’t come out, you were to dizzy, too overwhelmed by the lights flashing in front of your eyes, and no one seemed to notice. Everything else began fading into background but you still heard the one person you never thought you’d hear raise her voice yell your name.
~X~
Wednesday swore she would never be like her parents, yet here she was, searching for a gift for your “three-month anniversary” as Enid called it. It was ridiculous in every way possible, but Wednesday wanted this with you to work, and it was working, but she wanted it to really work. And a way to make it work was to show effort, that much even she knew. So, she got you a gift, nothing too big, just the chocolate you loved, because Enid warned her not to go over the top.
She was not her parents. She would not have gone over he top.
Her and Enid, along with Thing, walked into the quad just as you dropped to the grass next to the table and Wednesday saw red. Red laser light blinking in your face, red haze overtaking her, everything was red. “Y/N!” she yelled, running toward you as fast as she could, which was fast and dropping to her knees, her death glare was the only warning Xavier got to get away, she would, after all, deal with him later. You were her priority now. She quickly took a small pillow she carried with her just in case of something like this happening and placed it under your head and untied your tie and unbuttoned your collar to make breathing easier for you as your muscles jerked.
She watched, anger burning deep inside her, and no doubt showing on her face. Xavier was going to pay for this, he was going to regret ever approaching you in the first place. She was going to make sure he knew exactly what the consequences for hurting you were. Enid placed an arm on her shoulder as she knelt next to you.
“Wednesday,” Enid tried but Wednesday just shook her head, she wasn’t in the mood to be comforted. She just wanted you to be fine and then to make Xavier pay.
Eventually, after excruciatingly long time, because every second of you suffering was a second too long and not in any way the kind of torture Wednesday found to be enjoyable, you stopped having a seizure and she turned you onto your side and took your hand, letting you know she was right there. That she wasn’t about to let you go, that she was sorry she wasn’t there to stop it in the first place.
Your eyes opened slowly, and she could see you were disoriented, but she saw some recognition in your eyes as your eyes met hers. Fast recovery was a perk of your type of outcast, and she was thankful for that.
“You’ll be okay,” she whispered, and you managed a weak nod and squeezed her hand.
Later that night she barged into Xavier’s shed and before he could even register what was going on she tazed him and pinned him on the ground. The blade in her hand shone brightly as she nicked his neck. “If you ever even look at her, let alone repeat what you did today, I will make sure there is nothing left of you to bury,” she promised him as he whimpered pathetically. She should have his head, but that would only get her expelled and potentially separated from you, and that was one more form of torture she didn’t wish to endure.
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livelaughlovesubs · 3 days
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I have a small request which you can totally ignore if yous wants but-
Imagine Poe (bsd) feeling he isn't good enough and making a self-deprecating comment and reader fucking him while making him say (or until he says) he's worth it 💖
Ohhhh, that’s kinda sweet~ I like it heh
Dom!reader x sub!poe
Warning: pegging (can be read as a dick), praise kink, overstimulation, marking, fucked dumb
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“Who’s my good boy? Who’s doing such a good job right now?”
There was only one right answer. It was him. Of course it was your dear partner. He’s been obeying you so nicely, bouncing up and down on top of you without taking a break. His back was facing you, giving you a nice view of his ass, as well as how your dick gets hurried inside him each time he slumps back into your lap. These shaking hands grabbed yours, making you hold onto his waist harder and leaving bruises behind.
You leaned against him, lips hovering above his neck as your hot breath tickled his skin. A shiver ran down his spine when you whispered something again, “answer me, pretty boy.” That’s what you said, but you wouldn’t give him time to speak and think! Relentlessly pounding him while kissing and sucking on his back, painting his body with marks and hickeys. Who would under such circumstances be able to speak properly? All he could let out were soft sobs paired with high-pitched whimpers. Back arched away from you, hands bawled into fists as he slams himself against your crotch.
His hair was a messy nest, flying around and obstructing his view, not that he could have registered anything anyway since he was only focused on the stretching feeling inside him. Every time he slows down for what reason ever, you’d run your hip upwards to meet his, hitting his prostate with such pinpoint accuracy that it makes him see stars. Electricity would course through his body like huge waves of pleasure, rendering him unable to even form a single coherent word. One of poe’s hands was wrapped around his dick to jerk himself off. But poor baby has been too distracted by the feeling of getting fucked dumb, so much that he forgot to move his hand. Now only holding it like it’s some kind of broken decoration that’s leaking its filth everywhere.
Really, everywhere. His precum spread to the sheets, his thighs, and even his belly. Now everything became sticky because of him. What a naughty boy he was, creating such a chaos. When Poe still didn’t muster enough energy to answer your questions, you squeezed down on his hips, getting a better grip before forcing him up and down your cock in a rough pace. “Hu- ah..aAAHHhHNHgG wait- y/n..!! Too much oh <3 too much!” He’d complain, but due to the moans it doesn’t sound very convincing. Watching his muscles tighten as more tears roll down his body, along with droplets of sweat. His rosy cheeks were so adorable, his body too, so perfect for you. A perfect little toy for you to adore.
Once again you groaned into his ear, “tell me, Poe, who’s my good boy?” After you finished your sentence, you noticed how his rim clenched down on you, holding onto you without wanting to let go. “Mhmm..! I- I…” he tried to answer you, he really did, yet whenever he opens his mouth only more whines would spill out. “Go on baby, take your time.” You smirked at him, a comforting smile that told him everything will be alright. Poe closed his eyes in an attempt to collect his thoughts, but it backfired and made him focus only on the way you stretched his walls. God it was heavenly, it was ecstasy he never experienced before. Whenever you just meekly brushed against his sweet spot, he’d mewl and squeak like a little slut.
This is no good, he was close, he had to answer you or else he might receive a punishment. Why do you want him to praise himself anyway? It’s so embarrassing! When you once again drove your dick deep inside him, hitting spots he never knew existed, he lost all energy and slumped back against your chest. A melting expression on his face as drool dripped down his chin, body sore from all the overstimulation already. His legs twitched around as a poor attempt to balance out the pleasure he received. He was exhausted, he couldn’t keep going anymore, all he did in that moment was giving himself to you completely, letting you use him like a toy.
“This won’t do, you have to speak, pretty boy.” You reminded him, while clasping one hand over his, the one pathetically trying to play with his own member. “Uhh.. it feels ah, hNng too good.” He gave out, barely able to register the meaning of your words. “Hmm, but you can speak right? Need me to repeat my question?” Even now you didn’t give up, fucking his brains out while giving him orders. “Hic, hmm… m-me… ah, I’m your go- uhHnn good boy..<3” Poe answered eventually, after that his tongue stuck out and his eyes rolled back. As if you milking his prostate wasn’t enough, you were forcing his hand to pump his length up and down now as well! He was going to break at this point!
“Good job, that’s right, you are my loveliest good boy, so be proud of it alright?” You said, before pointing into him faster and harder as a reward. “AhhHHHHh!! OohhH! Too much- too deep!!! Y/n HngHh, too fasttt!!” Aww, he’s crying about how he can’t handle this again, such an adorable thing. Since he’s encouraging you so feverishly, you had to respond to his pleads, right? Grinning from ear as to ear as you mumbled, “Shh, don’t worry, you won’t break that quick, I want to make this moment last.”
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moonydustx · 14 hours
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Hi, I was wondering if you could do Zoro, Ace, Luffy, Law, Crocodile, King, and 2 Characters of your choice x Reader, where they and Reader are having a romantic moment and just when the moment is just right, something or someone interrupts the romantic scene?
ok, ok, I know, I'm really late with this one. But life is so chaotic that I won't even look for excuses hahah but I really liked your request. I think some came out a little less romantic? I don't know, I'll leave it for your evaluation. I hope you enjoy!
warnings were placed individually in each of the stories.
F!Reader x Zoro, Ace, Luffy, Law, Crocodile, King and Smoker (placed individually)
requests here | rules and guides | masterlist
Comments, reblogs and likes are greatly appreciated.
Zoro
warnings: mentions of previous fights/problems with an enemy pirate. Zoro is very direct with his feelings. Mentions of drinking (we have Zoro in this one, so it's kind of obligatory)
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Another victory, another time to rest in some bar.
Taking the opportunity to explore the new island after solving yet another series of problems, you and your companions chose to stuff their faces - and especially Luffy and Chopper, fill their bellies with food - in a bar they found there.
However, something still stirred you. The encounter with an enemy pirate that afternoon and the way he had spoken to you still affected you. It still made you see your position on the team as shallow, expendable, unnecessary. It still made you want to isolate yourself.
"A dose for whatever's going on in your head." Zoro placed three small glasses in front of you and three in front of him when he sat down.
"What do you mean by that?" you turned to him, only then realizing that what was a full table before was now just the two of you.
"Everyone was leaving, some asking you to come along, but you seemed stuck in your own head." he explained and drank the first shot of drink. "Like I said, one glass, one thought."
"And what are you thinking?"
"That you stayed here because you didn't want to go with the wire eyebrow, of course." he pointed out, eliciting a light laugh from you. Little did Zoro know that, out of all the options you could have, Sanji wasn't exactly the one you were looking for. "Now it's your turn."
You downed the drink and felt the strong alcohol burn your throat, but the words didn't want to come out. It was too difficult to bring into the world an insecurity that, in your eyes, would be so dispensable in the vision of someone as strong as Zoro.
"Me again." he pointed out, seeing that you had remained quiet. As soon as he downed another shot, he started. "You let that shit that guy said get into your head, didn't you?"
"Can you tell me where he went wrong?" you asked and only saw Zoro laugh in disbelief. "I'm weak, I'm just a linguist, I can't fight, I don't have a devil fruit. What am I but dead weight?"
"Much more than you imagine." Zoro responded as if it were obvious.
"Much more? Only if it's much more of a burden, much more of a responsibility. I don't want to cause problems for anyone, I don't want to become a responsibility. If it weren't for you today…"
"If it weren't for me, you would still be alive and well, no one would let that idiot hurt you." Zoro seemed to be stressing about the subject and that became clearer when you saw him downing his last dose and the two of yours that were left and then remaining in a brief silence.
"I'm sorry Zoro, I didn't mean to…"
"You're important, okay? To Luffy, to the crew, to me." Seeing you look away from him, without much refinement or kindness, Zoro turned your face back to him, holding you by the chin. "I would face him a thousand times over if I had to."
"Zoro, what does that mean?"
"You mean I never want to hear you talk about yourself like that again, please." the ending came out more like a whisper than anything else. "And it also means that whenever you need me, I will protect you. It's not everyone's responsibility, you're right, but please let it be mine."
You could feel the adrenaline rush through your body as well as waves of goosebumps going through you from the point Zoro touched you and before he finished the path to your lips, a loud noise on the table separated the two of you.
"Here you go!" Luffy sat between the two of you, practically half on top of each of your bodies. In front, a plate full of different types of sweets: chocolates, lollipops, cotton candy. Chopper was along, already stealing some pieces. "Today we know it was a difficult day for you and we know you like sweets, so this is a good thing to cheer you up. What do you think?"
"I think it's amazing!" You took a piece of chocolate, enjoying it as it melted in your mouth. "Thank you, you're amazing." despite leaving in a loud voice, your eyes went to Zoro, who just nodded and adjusted himself on the bar stool, pleased to see you happy again.
Ace
warnings: Ace and F!Reader have a casual, no-strings-attached affair.
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The party and chaos accumulated on one side of the Moby Dick, it was a common image as there was no shortage - and often, barely needed - of reasons for the crew to get drunk and celebrate something. That didn't exempt you. With a good dose of beer in hand, you were sitting further back on the edge of the ship, just contemplating the mess a good few meters ahead, while the sea was choppy behind you, the cool breeze sending goosebumps against your skin.
"Hey, what's a pretty girl doing so isolated like that?" Ace leaned against the free space next to you.
"I just came to catch some wind, breathe a little." you explained, seeing him get even closer and stop almost glued to your side. "And you?"
"I just came to see a pretty girl." He placed his hand on your knee, caressing your skin, which was covered in goosebumps by the cool wind - and perhaps by his touch. "But seriously, is everything okay?"
"Of course, I really just came to enjoy the view for a bit." you explained, seeing him paying attention to every word. "I like to keep these happy moments in my memory, and besides, the night is beautiful."
"Yeah, I like it too." giving up the caress on your leg, he sat down next to you. "I like to think that one day it will be the two of us."
"What do you mean the two of us?"
"This celebration today. It's going to be about the two of us. About me putting you there in the middle, getting down on my knees and asking you to be mine and then, after a while, it's going to be the celebration about our marriage." he saw you laugh knowing he had surprised you with his brief proposal.
"And what else, fire fists?"
"The old man is going to celebrate our wedding, after all, he's the one who has to give the blessing. We're going to drink all night and then, after a while, maybe we'll be celebrating the arrival of our child, I don't know." he shrugged, chuckling at the very thought. "Maybe I went too far."
"For all of this, we need to stop being just hookups, don't you think?"
"You and I know that's not all we are." His tone of voice lowered, as if he was telling an intimate secret - which it wasn't - between you. "You know you mean so much more than just that to me."
"I know and I know you know it too." you turned around to try and steal a quick kiss from him, but were stopped by Ace placing his hat on you.
Gently, he hit the object on your head, removing your strands of hair that were a little messy and then, he helped the small hanging rope. His hand wandered from the object to your cheek, placing a quick caress.
"I love you, Ace." your voice came out as a brief whisper, a confession that was almost forbidden.
"I love you even more." he stole an almost chaste kiss from your lips, just to confirm the feeling.
"You should say that sober." you warned him and saw him walk away with a cynical laugh in him. Upon reaching the glass he had brought, Ace took another sip and offered it to you, who accepted. Water.
"I needed courage to come and talk to you about this today and I don't think drinking alcohol would help." he explained, placing quick kisses along your exposed skin. "So, no more hookups?"
"No more hookups." you confirmed, feeling his lips slide over your skin. "Keep doing that and I'm going to want you to get down on your knees and propose as soon as possible."
"For your information, I intend to kneel today." his kisses found the weak spot on your neck. "But you're the one who's going to be asking for something more."
"Stop that!" perhaps the distraction of his kisses prevented you from seeing Thatch and Marco approaching. "The two of them won't be isolated in this clump."
"Did he have the decency to ask you to be his girlfriend?" Marco asked you, who nodded, feeling his cheeks burn in shyness. "Finally!"
"Then there are no more excuses…" Thatch threw Ace over his shoulder and Marco did the same to you.
"Put me down." the fire fist asked, even if he wanted to, he would have let go of there.
"We need to celebrate. You finally got the courage." Marco pointed out while you didn't even make an effort to get off his shoulder.
It should have been a night for the two of you to celebrate the new agreement between you, but it was difficult to celebrate alone when everyone wanted to celebrate the fact that you were finally and officially together.
Luffy
warnings: Luffy is a cute fool, that's all. Ah, we have mentions of Luffy sinking into the water (poor dear and his inability to swim)
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Damn, a thousand times damn. Why was it almost impossible to get Luffy to listen to anything other than his crazy ideas?
Most of the time it had ended well, but it didn't seem to be the same as today. Praying to any god that could help you at that moment, you threw yourself against the cold, turbulent water of the sea. Shaking your arms the way you thought swimming was, you began to dive awkwardly. A few feet below, you could see Luffy sinking.
With some difficulty, you reached him and despite being weak, he still remained conscious for enough seconds to see that it was you there. Sticking to his vest and using the very little you knew, you managed to pull him back to the Sunny and now the fight that was taking place throughout the ship was being contained mainly by Zoro and Sanji, leaving you not much to worry about other than revive Luffy.
Not finding many plausible solutions, you stuck your mouth to his and tried to pull out all the water he had swallowed. When you repeated the gesture for the third time, you saw him wake up spitting, while you were kneeling next to him, relief washing over you.
"Thank you for saving me." he began, knowing you would probably be furious. "And apparently you learned to swim."
"Desperate times call for desperate measures." you allowed yourself to relax for a brief moment. In the end, he was fine.
"The only problem is, I've always thought about doing it, but not right after I drowned." upon seeing the question mark that was practically drawn on your forehead, Luffy continued. "I always thought about kissing you. You're pretty, nice…"
"Have you always thought about kissing me?" You looked indignant, but quickly corrected yourself, letting the little secret you carried for so long slip out there. "I've always thought that too Luffy, I think I like you, more than just as friends."
"Can we repeat the kiss…" before he finished proposing, his calm tone was replaced by a loud grumble as soon as he was hit by Nami.
"You idiot! How can you let yourself fall into the sea when there was only one person who doesn't know how to swim to save you." she insisted, the angry tone clear in her voice.
Some of your coughs caught the attention of both of them, as well as that of the ship's doctor.
"You might have swallowed a lot of water too!" Chopper pointed out, stethoscope in hand. "I need to run some tests."
"Don't worry about it, Chopper." You tried to push him away, but soon you felt him cover you with a cloth.
"Listen to Chopper." Luffy asked this time, already recovered and almost dry, which was a mystery to you how he managed to do it. "Chopper, take care of her and as soon as everything is okay, call me, please."
Luffy had no social constraints that would prevent him from doing that in front of everyone, but something told him that it had to be special. Then he just placed a chaste kiss on your cheek and left. Now everyone seemed as lost as you had been the first time.
Law
warnings: sweet boyfriend Law. This has to be a warning because this man is amazing.
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Before you even open your eyes, you can feel a pair of arms wrapping around you firmly, moist lips sliding along the contour of your neck. The warm quilting of the blanket against your skin also made you want to stay there even more. However, it had just been a break after lunch for the two of you to talk - and in fact, talk and without meaning to, or perhaps because of the way his fingers slid under the top of your head in a caress, you found yourself being dragged to the world of dreams.
"Looks like someone woke up from their nap." Law's huskier voice indicated that you weren't the only one to have closed your eyes that afternoon.
"Looks like I wasn't the only one who took a nap." you - even though you practically had to fight against his arms - turned around, just a few centimeters separating your face from his. "You look rested."
"And you look beautiful, even in your sleep." he stole a quick kiss from your lips. "Even snoring."
"Snoring?"
"Yes, the noise was certainly capable of driving away the sea kings that were circling around." he grunted when he felt the light, painless slap on his arm. "Okay, it was just a cute snore."
"A cute snore?" you pushed him in vain, feeling like you only gave him enough space to pull you onto his body. "Don't even think about it, Trafalgar, after that, you don't deserve it."
"Don't be so mean." his hands slid over your body in a gentle way, practically not malicious. "Don't I deserve anything?"
"Nothing." you leaned down, placing a kiss on his cheek.
"That kind of nothing seems interesting to me." he pointed to the other cheek. "Can I have a nothing here too?" As soon as your lips met his skin, the tattooed finger moved to another corner of his face. "And here, can I?"
"Since when did you become so sappy?" you continued following where he pointed, leaving soft trails of kisses against his skin. The last place he pointed was at his lips. "Do you think you haven't gotten enough kisses?"
"Not yet." He raised himself up on his elbows, just to reach your lips and take them for himself.
His hands soon tangled against your messy strands of hair, while almost slowly he allowed himself to explore every corner of the paradise that was hidden between your lips. There was no searching for contact, no mischievous squeezes or grumbling and moaning, just the two of you, tangled in a pile of sheets, exchanging kisses and caresses.
"Captain!" Bepo's voice reached the two of you before he had practically walked through the door. "I found you!"
"Would you mind knocking on the door before coming in!" Law's voice started low and ended almost furiously.
His hands, previously on your body, pulled the sheet to cover your body. Even though you were fully dressed and Bepo posed no threat, Law couldn't help the sense of protection that surrounded him when it came to you.
"What's up Bepo?" You said more sweetly, discreetly trying to get off your boyfriend.
"The captain is about an hour late for his task and Ikkaku has been looking for you for a while too." the bear explained. "And also, if we continue on the same route, we will come face to face with a giant sea king in a few minutes."
"And you just let me know now?" Law grunted, but the stress was short-lived when he heard your laugh, almost like an automatic tranquilizer for him. "I'll meet you in a minute."
Understanding the message, Bepo closed the door and left the room. Your boyfriend's face gave it all away: he wished he could stay there, but he couldn't. Duty called you both.
"I'm coming to sleep here with you today, what do you think?" you proposed and saw him stop fixing his shoes to look at you, a small smile lit against his lips.
"Please." He asked, making you nod. "Well, I warned you."
"What did you warn me?"
"Your snoring, now I have a king of the seas to take down." he laughed when he saw you mumble. The small pout on your lips was covered with a kiss from him. "I'll see you later love."
Crocodile
warnings: jealous crocodile, as always. Brief appearance of our favorite hawk eyes.
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Some things started to make sense when you entered the large hall. As an assistant, you knew that part of the ball was just an excuse to attract some enemies while the other part was to find allies, investors or anyone who could make a relevant contribution to the Cross Guild.
Even though you knew all the planning for the party, you still didn't understand why a long, sparkling dark green dress appeared on your table a few days ago. When you saw one of the evening's hosts, you noticed that - perhaps coincidentally - the two of you's outfits matched.
Waving to some infamous pirates - with rewards that you lost count of digits - little by little you got closer to whoever had provided such an outfit for you.
"I see you liked my gift." Crocodile said as you stopped in front of him. Without hesitating, he took one of your hands and made you do a little turn. "It served as if it was made for you."
"I suspect it was actually made for me, am I right?" you accepted the champagne and with an almost malicious smile you took a brief sip. The two of you lived in a cat and mouse hunt between all the years you had been working together, your feelings for him were clear and at least on one day, you expected to be reciprocated.
"I couldn't afford to let the most beautiful lady of the night go unnoticed, or unaccompanied." He said and for a brief minute, you realized he still hadn't let go of your hand. The awareness of the act seemed to reach him too and in a subtle way, he let his hand fall to his side. "And after so long…"
"After Alabasta, after Impel Down, here we are." you concluded his idea, a sideways smile took over Crocodile. "Everyone begging to be at your feet again."
"I know I'm a little cold, I won't deny that fact, but…" he approached, letting the words come out gently and quietly, as if nothing mattered other than the two of you there. "I'm grateful that all these years you've been by my side."
"And I'm grateful that all these years you allowed me to stay. For taking me out of that miserable life." you just said, reaching out to grab another glass and handing it to him. "Here's to business."
"I'm hoping this is the last toast to business." He tapped the glass against yours, seeing your expression remain in doubt. "I hope our next toast like this, you won't be my assistant anymore. I mean, just my assistant."
"And what do you expect, Sir Crocodile?" you gave him space to approach, stopping just a few inches away.
"Instead of green, maybe you'll wear white. And we sure as hell won't have that bunch of stupid pirates." he pointed out, seeing you smile widely. He raised the cup towards you again. "So, here's to our last night of business?"
"Sorry to interrupt." Mihawk's voice reached you as did his brief touch on your waist.
"I hope it's something important." Crocodile's mild expression faded as he analyzed his business partner and wondered why he was touching you.
"I need your help, miss." he pointed out, turning to you. "An idiot who refuses to take his eyes off you coincidentally owes me a few things. Would you be willing to serve as a little bait?" The groan that came from Crocodile upon hearing Mihawk's proposal to you didn't go unnoticed. "It's just a talk with him."
"Alright, I can help you with that." you agreed, much to your partner's chagrin. You handed your cup to Crocodile and taking advantage of the fact that Mihawk practically covered you from the others' view, you gave Crocodile a quick peck. "Last night of business, okay?" the man just nodded and watched you leave with the other man.
"Mihawk?" he called, seeing Mihawk and you turn towards him. "Let him lay a finger on my girl and I'll have his head and yours on my desk."
King
warnings: cute, very cute. Kind of like OC King, but I can't help but write him being cute. Sorry.
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Some companions respected him too much - you analyzed it as pure fear, but you preferred to keep the observation to yourself - however, King did not impose this "fear" on you, quite the opposite.
When you weren't carrying out any of the requested orders, you liked to take your time and observe him. How he seemed to have been sculpted by something that went beyond comparison, how he could be affable when no one was around - this Queen insisted amid acid comments that it was an affection directed only at you.
After a long battle and few scratches distributed throughout the crew, in a more private corner you can see him sitting, patching up a possible injury to his hand. Aside from the bandage and messy hair, he still looked the perfect vision.
"How can I help you?" the words spill out of you without giving you much time to think.
"Don't worry about that."
"That's kind of impossible." you moved even closer, assessing his hand. "It's a small cut, it should heal in a few days."
"It was a small oversight." He shrugged and smoothed the insistent strand of hair that fell into his face.
"Can I help you with this?" you asked and he just nodded, giving you space to work.
Agilely, your fingers reached the stubborn strand and began to adjust it back to where it belonged, that is, the braid that was almost part of it. As soon as you finished, you adjusted it so that it wouldn't fall into his face again.
What went unnoticed by you was how close the two of you were, about how when you looked down you could feel his eyes burning towards you, as they strayed from yours towards your lips.
"Thank you… I mean, how can I thank you for that?" his voice was no more than a brief whisper.
"It is not necessary…"
"I insist." he interrupted you, being graced with the smile he knew on your lips. What he wouldn’t give to let you know what that meant to him.
"A ride then." your answer sounded natural to him, as if the idea crossed your mind with a certain frequency. "I always wanted to see the world from above."
"A ride, sounds amazing to me."
"I knew." Queen's voice interrupted the two of you and you immediately moved away from his body. "I told you that this softie was only soft on you."
"Shut up." King simply said without even looking in the other's direction, his eyes following you to apologize and leave.
How did that idiot Queen feel free to interrupt - and even embarrass - someone so beautiful?
The sun was already setting when you finally finished your tasks for the day and out of everything you could have expected to find in front of you, on your bed, you didn't expect to find a small note.
This way, we cannot be interrupted. Neither on this note nor among the clouds.
I heard that especially tonight the moon and the view from above will be beautiful, not as beautiful as the girl reading this note. Would you like a ride?
Smoker
warnings: mentions of a previous incident, but we have no descriptions, just brief mention of it being traumatic. F!Reader is also in the Navy.
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Even without opening your colleague's door, it was almost as if you could see smoke coming through the gaps. Smoker was stressed and that was nothing new, especially when one of his missions went wrong.
"Commander Smoker?" your knocking on the door didn't seem to have caught his attention that much, so you opened a small gap, seeing him typically sitting with two cigars in his hands. "I can enter?"
"Yes." he simply responded, watching you close the door behind you and cross the small space that separated you from his desk.
"Here are some reports from today's mission."
You placed them on the table and you could see him still sulking. You had been working together for too long to know that if possible, Smoker would always let his frustration take over the entire environment - and sometimes it wasn't even in the form of smoke.
"I heard that some stupid pirates gave you a hard time today." you pointed out and saw him just respond with a look, he really wasn't interested in conversation.
A small idea, more like a memory than an idea, crossed your mind and you decided to put it into practice.
"You seem tense." you stated and saw him sigh deeply as you left your gloves on the armchair in front of him.
Without even asking permission - if he didn't want to, you would have at least gotten closer to him, you let your hands slide lightly from his shoulders to the back of his head. It only took a few squeezes for you to start to see him relax. Massaging all over his shoulder and neck, Smoker slowly began to become something more malleable and accessible under your hands.
"Those idiots, if I catch those little shits." he grunted, turning his neck a little to give you more room to work. "And you still ask if I'm tense."
"Some things are impossible to go unnoticed." you let the laughter escape you, a comfort to Smoker's ears. "But you know, sometimes you need to take some time off and relax."
"You say it like you take a lot of time to relax." he turned around, seeing you stick your tongue out. "Some things are impossible to go unnoticed." he repeated to you. "How many nights did you sleep well after that incident?"
"Well, I guess…" you thought for a moment, now your hands were just resting on his shoulders. "To be honest? I think it was only that night that I slept there." you pointed to the armchair on the opposite side. "And of course, in the infirmary. Their medicine is good."
"Don't say things like that." he pointed out, little did you know but the idea of ​​that night still gave him chills.
Letting the affection he had for you guide him, Smoker brought his hand to yours on his shoulder and pulled it, so that your face was level with his.
"I believe we both need to relax." he pointed out, his breathing practically mixing with yours.
"Yeah, we both need it."
You could almost taste Smoker's lips when the door ahead abruptly opened, revealing a panting Tashigi in front of you.
"Commander Smoker!" she started and then stopped, analyzing the situation in front of her eyes. "Do I interrupt something?"
"Don't worry honey, I'm leaving." you pointed out and you could hear Smoker practically grunting in front of you.
"What's so important Tashigi." he didn't bother to let go of your hand, even with the girl's presence, even with your body already standing behind him.
"The pirates from the last mission, someone attacked their ship and they sank, so the team that stayed behind managed to bring them in." Smoker jumped to his feet immediately, picking up the reports you had left on the table.
"You can go, I'll be waiting here." you warned without even waiting for him to ask. As soon as the room was empty, you occupied your favorite armchair and, as you rarely did, you allowed yourself to relax with the aroma of Smoker that still remained in the room.
201 notes · View notes
sukirichi · 16 hours
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[ DUSK ‘TILL DAWN : 009 ]
“we who bear the burden of the crown do not need to love. you only need to stay here, with me, in power, in greed, in lust – in victory.”
c/w. 18+. modern royal au. infidelity. angst. gaslighting. toxic characters. very suggestive. toxic relationships. unedited. kiyoomi is horny. and uh suna too
notes. we are in kiyoomi arccc whewww, also i think i mentioned the word balls like three times. anyways.
wc. 10.8k
series masterlist 
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[ NINE ] i know a place, it’s somewhere I go when I need to remember your face. we get married in our heads, something to do while we try to recall how we met
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You were still reeling from your shock by the time your Mother showed up beside you. She must have noticed the quite interesting crowd of the royals and their parents, and couldn’t wait to indulge in the drama. A nosy creature, your mother was, but her presence comforted you. You had heard about it before – the tradition of having your last dance on your debutante ball would be your destined lover. Your mother would know; your father was her last dance. But you couldn’t remember it clearly, not when your only memory of your debut ball was the sinking dread of coming out into society and having to be removed from the comfort of your bedroom.
“My last dance,” you mused, plastering an apologetic smile as you turned to the older Prince. “Forgive me, Your Highness. I hadn’t known it was you.”
“As I’ve mentioned, I am the Forgotten Prince.”
Kanami ignored her son’s remark and clapped her hands. “It was a beautiful last dance as well. In fact, I’m certain your Mother remembers it.”
“I do! Oh, Princess, Miss Sakusa is right. I still remember that first time you danced with one of the Princes! It was magical!”
“It must be,” quipped Suna, who possessively wrapped an arm around your waist. He was close enough you could feel his breath on the nape of your neck, and even without looking at him, you could tell he was glaring at his brother.  “Kiyoomi is a fantastic dancer. But tradition aside, fate sure has a funny way of working out because I wasn’t her last dance, yet she married me. I am a lucky Prince for that.”
“You weren’t even at her debut ball,” mumbled the Second Prince, causing your eyes to nearly pop out your head.
You knew it was rare for royals to attend the birthday balls of even noble families, but finding out that your husband hadn’t danced with you on your special night was a different kind of hurt.
“The Crown Prince is a lucky man, indeed,” sighed Kanami dreamily, unaware of the tension between you four – with the brothers ready to tear at each other’s throat, and Iris’ smile slowly transforming into a grimace. An eventful night, indeed. “So, Your Highness, any thoughts on my invitation?”
You didn’t give it a second thought.
“I would love to visit Itachiyama, Kanami.”
“Splendid! Oh, come, come, we have much to talk about!” she stole you away despite your husband’s protests, and soon, you were led away from the crowd. It was all up to your Mother to hold Rintaro back. Glancing back at your husband worriedly, all the worries faded away. Because he wasn’t even looking at you, but rather at Iris, who clutched her head and murmured something while Rintaro fretted over her. The only person who looked at you was Prince Kiyoomi, his handsome face stoic while his mother yapped in your ear.
“You have no idea how happy you’ve made this old woman.”
You turned away from her son’s intense gaze, waving a dismissive hand in the hair. “Please. You are hardly old. I can only hope I look as good as you at that age.”
“Dear, you flatter me too much!”
Smiling at her cuteness, you glanced around the room to look at her again. It seemed like she knew she would be the tonight’s topic, as the Princess’ red lips flattened into a thin line. You almost had the urge to smile wickedly. Almost, if she hadn’t been leaning against your husband for support. You wanted to scoff. She really had the audacity to pretend she was the poor one here – and because of what? Because her mother in law disapproved of her?
She had everything already. She had your husband’s heart, and you couldn’t even keep his attention on you for longer than ten minutes.
The Princess needed to stop acting like a kicked puppy. Otherwise, you would truly give in to the desire to kick her until she whined and cried at your feet.
Gods. Since when had you been so violent?
“As much as I am looking forward to our trip, however, I cannot help but wonder why you seemed… against Princess Iris,” you voiced your thoughts out, feigning innocence. “I am only assuming, of course. I do not mean to say you hold any animosity towards Her Highness.”
“You are not wrong. I do hold some ‘animosity’ towards her,” chuckled the free-mouthed Kanami, almost as if she didn’t care anyone could hear. She was too laid-back for a foreign guest, but you supposed with her wealth and fame, along with the fact she was the biological mother of the Second Prince, her confidence made sense. “I am well aware it is wrong, and I could be gravely punished for speaking ill about the royals, but… I never quite liked her for my son. They were never a great fit.”
“Is it because he is older?”
“Pssh. The age gap hardly matters. He is only three years older. But there is something about Iris… something… off. I mean, I know my place. It is not like I married the King or was promised any security or titles when I birthed his son, but I am still his mother, and surely I have the right to care about his future. That includes who he marries, and quite frankly, I dislike his wife. She seems ingenuine.”
“How so?”
Kanami’s cheeks puckered out. “Well, imagine my shock when my son – who spends most of his time hiding away in his room with his nose buried in a book – suddenly becomes a husband in a fortnight! And to her, no less. It is all too suspicious, I tell you. I have never heard nice things about that girl and her mother.”
“Her mother was an honorable and loyal follower of the Crown. Despite being from Itachiyama, they pledged their lives to the Crown.”
“Which is odd in itself, because Itachiyama is a great country. We are peaceful, and if there are issues within the people, it is resolved immediately. So that whole sham of a story of her mother ‘defecting’ and moving here for a better life sounds unbelievable,” she shook her head, lowering her voice as she hid her lips behind her palm. “And I know her mother. Kate. She has always been ambitious, scarily so.”
“And you know this because…?”
“Because years ago, when His Majesty visited Itachiyama, I was not the one who meant to end up in his bed,” she admitted with a wince, “Kate had always set her sights on greater things. If she couldn’t be his wife, she could be his concubine, at the very least. And oh, His Majesty was smitten with her. She was a wonderful performer, and they shared too many drinks, but… Well, I, myself, am lost on what happened next. The King and I conversed the whole night, and I felt a spark, you know?”
Your head spun with all this information. You always knew the Royal Family Tree was a mess, thanks to the late King’s trysts with multiple women. But hearing about the history of it all caused your head to ache.
“I see. And that night, Kiyoomi was conceived.”
“He was. And Kate never spoke to me again. Next thing I know, I heard she moved to Inarizaki, and I figured she still hadn’t given up on the King. So when my son informed he was now married to Kate’s daughter, I was restless. I am most certain this had to be her doing.”
“Where is she now? Iris’ mother?”
“I don’t know,” she blinked, as if realizing this now, too. “She disappeared one day, and each time I asked Iris how her mother was faring, she’d stop speaking completely.”
“Perhaps she is not on good terms with her mother and is uncomfortable about the topic.”
“Perhaps,” she agreed, and then tilted her head to the side, a smirk on her pretty face. “Is it rude of me to say I wish my son married you instead? I know you are smitten with your Prince, but a mother can hope, can she not?”
The rest of the night, Miss Sakusa terrorized the guests. It was uncanny seeing how different she was to her son, who barely spoke a word. She was bright and lively, lived for sarcasm, and seemed to have a penchant for making Iris uncomfortable. You honestly would’ve felt bad if you didn’t agree to the mean things Kanami said about her. But that aside, you still couldn’t move over the fact that Iris was a huge contrast to Maiko. Maiko and Oikawa’s marriage, you understood. She came from an influential noble family, and so did Tooru. But who was Iris, exactly? How exactly did a citizen from Itachiyama, without a father and a mysterious, greedy mother end up being married to a Prince also in line for the crown?
Could it be that Kanami was right? Did Iris’ mother plan all of this – all to have a spot in the throne? If it was true, then you couldn’t cross out the possibility Iris may have seduced Rintaro when they were teenagers. He was the Crown Prince, for goodness’ sake. There was no quicker ticket to the throne than to have the rightful heir be smitten with you.
All this thinking wasn’t good for the night.
You were supposed to enjoy, and so you stole a glass when a servant passed and down the drink, uncaring if people thought it to be ungraceful for a Princess. It was an intimate gathering, anyway, with only the royal family and some of your closest friends and relatives. Surely they would understand you needed to loosen up.
Breaking free from Kanami, who had now taken her attentions to fixing Kiyoomi’s unruly curls, you watched as your Mother stood in front of the podium. She tapped the bread knife against her class, the clinking sound catching everyone’s attention. When she had them, your mother took a deep breath, searching for you in the crowd as a smile lit up her face.
You stiffened in your seat. Beside you, Rintaro took his place, his hand snaking down to rest on your thigh.
“I would like to thank everyone who graced us with their presence tonight,” your mother began, raising her glass in the air. “And I would like a toast in honor of Her Highness’ marriage, and to the Crown Prince, as well. I wish you both nothing but happiness and may you reign supreme.”
“To the Prince and Princess!” cheered the crowd. Feeling everyone’s eyes on you, you leaned back against Rintaro’s chest and smiled, the perfect image of a couple in love. Rintaro played the part, too, squeezing your thigh and pressing a kiss on the curve of your cheek. You let out a giggle – though it sounded more like a gurgle at the shock. Rintaro chuckled at your reaction, his chest vibrating with the sound.
You couldn’t deal with this anymore.
The night went from perfect to messed up, to you being slapped in the face with reality. You felt bad for yourself for not learning. Just because your husband danced with you, and he’d been perfect the past few days, didn’t mean he wouldn’t run to Iris if given the chance. You’d seen it with your own eyes. How if stuck in a situation where he was forced to choose between the two, he would choose her. And it was pathetic. You had his ring on your finger. You had the burden of his crown and title on your shoulders when all you ever wanted was love. And he couldn’t even give you that. Worse, he meant none of it.
How was it so easy for him to laugh and kiss you like it was the most normal thing in the world when both of you knew deep down he did not want you?
It was becoming unbearable. You needed to leave. Now.
Prying yourself off his grasp, you ducked. “Excuse me.” Rintaro couldn’t get the chance to speak when you darted past him and into the restroom. There, you heard the racing of your heart loud and clear – a song of both yearning and hurt lingering deep in your bones. You couldn’t understand it – not when you glanced at your reflection in the mirror and wondered… why not me? You were beautiful. You were educated. Surely, he must have seen good qualities in you if he chose to court you for two years when there were other more charismatic bachelorettes out there. Or… did he choose you because he knew you were inexperienced? Because you were lonely, shy, and therefore the easiest to manipulate?
The worst part of it all was that he had already made his intentions clear. You knew he loved her. You saw it in his eyes – the way his eyes drooped when he spoke about her, and his voice grew softer. How he yearned for her so badly talking about her hurt. But Maiko had given you false hope, and his sweet gestures didn’t help. This would all be easier if he hurt you, like he had back at your honeymoon, because then at least you would have a greater reason to hate him.
And that was what you wanted, wasn’t it?
To turn all this love into hate.
So letting him go would be easier. Although it never was.
Gripping the edge of the sink, you forced yourself to take deep breaths. Breathe in, breathe out. Count from one to eight with your eyes closed and focus only on the sensation of your lungs expanding and retracting. Do not think about him, do not think about his kisses, or his hand on your thigh, or how he called you beautiful –
“So this is where you were.”
You raised your head. Rintaro swung the door open, leaning against the doorframe as he watched you inquisitively. You both stared at each other like that for a moment, letting all the unspoken words just hang in the air until he broke the silence. “I’m sorry,” he sighed, sounding defeated. And this time, it sounded like he meant it.  “You know I don’t wish to lie to your parents like that.”
You shrugged, turning on the faucet and splashing some water on your face. It became harder to breathe when he was around – all handsome and every bit the piece of your greatest desire.
“It’s just another night we have to see the end of.”
“Are you really going to Itachiyama?” he craned his head, eyes narrowed. “I cannot accompany you.”
“I did not ask you to.”
“I know, but,” he tried to argue, crossing the distance in three long strides. Just like the other night at the Palace hallway, his large frame engulfed you, trapping you between him and the sink. With him this close, you could see the unmasked desperation written all over his face. The frustration. “It’s… it’s Kiyoomi. I am uncomfortable knowing you would be spending days with him. Alone, at that. At least take someone with you.”
“My maids are coming.”
“I do not mean the maids.”
“Then who should I bring? His precious wife?” you rolled your eyes, “In case you weren’t aware, she isn’t invited either.”
“She should be…”
You couldn’t stop yourself from planting your palms in his chest, and gave him a shove. Your stupid husband, all lean with muscle, barely budged. It irritated you further. “Oh, come on, Your Highness. Do not act like this inconveniences you. I will be away for days, and so is your lover’s husband. The two people standing in your way will be out of your hair. Shouldn’t you be rejoicing in delight? No better time to frolic around with your lover when your wife and her husband aren’t around.”
Rintaro’s jaw clenched.
“You are saying I should be happy my wife is going on vacation with another man.”
“It sounds to me like you are afraid of your own shadow,” you mocked, and Rintaro flinched back. He hadn’t expected the harsh truth of your words would pierce this deep. “I am not an adulterer, my Prince. It has never once occurred to me to seduce someone else when I am married. Besides, Iris seemed rather relieved at the prospect of having you all by herself for a week,” you reminded him, having seen the Princess’ newfound relief only moments after Kanami had announced you would be having a trip with her son. It made you want to laugh. “You should enjoy, my Prince. You can even fuck in our bedroom.”
Whatever distance he previously put between you disappeared.
Rintaro growled, slamming his chest into yours until there was nothing but your clothes separating you. He shook with fury, and you delighted in it. How you could provoke this reaction from him. And you laughed, or tried to, because all the noises you made got swallowed in your throat when Rintaro grabbed your throat. Not tight enough to choke you, but the pressure served as a warning. Swiping his thumb on your lower lip, Rintaro huffed.
“Every day you test my patience. I think I rather preferred you when you were more malleable.”
“Sounds like you married the wrong person, then,” you spat out, and Rintaro’s dark chuckle reverberated in the empty space of the room.
“Oh, I made no mistake choosing you, that I assure. You are perfect in my eyes, whether you believe it or not,” and sooner than you liked, your husband was off of you again. But he was still close enough that his fingers intertwined with yours, the touch shockingly gentle despite his apparent anger with you. “And because you are my perfect wife, and my Princess, we will go back out there with all smiles and laughter. We are to appear in love. Do you understand?”
You glared up at him defiantly.
“Fuck you, Rintaro.”
Your husband smirked. “Darling, I wish you would.”
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You began packing for your trip to Itachiyama. It wasn’t supposed to be for another three days, since Kanami still had work and wanted to be free by the time you and Kiyoomi arrived, but after everything that happened between you and Rintaro, you were eager to leave. After that dreadful night at the ball where he forced you to hold his hand the entire time, your legs felt uncomfortable with slick.
As shameful as it was to admit, you hadn’t expected your husband’s anger would make you feel things. Sinful things that led you to sneaking your hands down your thighs when you got home. And by the Gods, you bit your lip so hard to not scream his name when he was just in the other room.
Another moment spent with him was just pure torture. So, you were running away.
It wasn’t the bravest thing to do, but you already tried braving it all, only to fail spectacularly. You were still weak around him, and until you managed enough strength to actually pretend you didn’t care about Rintaro, the distance sounded like bliss. Even if your husband eventually supported you in this trip, because ‘he can finally spend more time with Iris.’ Right. You wanted him to be happy about this, but heavens, couldn’t he act a little less eager to have you gone?
You think you would lose it if he truly fucked her in your bed.
“Call me when you get there,” Rintaro’s voice drifted through the wind, and you swallowed. You were now at the airport, and he stood there below the staircase, hands shoved in his pockets. Your heart ached at the sight of him – so handsome with the wind messing up his hair, his cheeks just slighty flushed from the cold, and his lips plump and swollen still from the farewell kiss he gave you. It was all just an act, of course, since there must be some lingering paparazzi, but you still felt him. You could still taste the mint of his toothpaste on your tongue, his strawberry candy lingering at your taste buds.
But of course, he didn’t love you.
You felt the lack of that, too.
“I’ll see you,” was all you said before turning around, already looking inside the plane and spotting Kiyoomi.
He sat on the seat across from you, his eyes closed with music playing in his headphones. He looked so peaceful like this. For once, he wasn’t frowning, and it was then that nervousness settled in you as you awkwardly shifted in your seat. You still weren’t quite too fond of the Second Prince – his dry remarks always baffled you. He always left you wondering if you should laugh it off, or if you should apologize. If not that, his silence itself was completely unsettling. And when he opened his eyes, his body as still as water when he regarded you, you were certain you stopped breathing.
“Are you ready to go?”
“Huh? Oh. Oh, yes. I am.”
The Prince nods, looking outside the window. You did, too, and then regretted it when you caught sight of Iris and Rintaro outside the limos, huddled together for warmth. To other people’s eyes, it would just be two people waving goodbye to their spouses as they left. But you and Kiyoomi knew better.
Wriggling back to make himself more comfortable in his seat, Kiyoomi turned up the volume in his phone. “Well, this is going to be fun.”
You wished you could agree.
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When you woke, you had arrived in Itachiyama. It was only a forty-five minute flight, but you dozed off nonetheless, and when you did, Kiyoomi had already wrapped a blanket around you. You thanked the silent Prince for it, but he made no gesture to say whether he heard you or not. He was a gentleman, at least. Holding your hand as you made your way down the plane, opening the doors for you into his car, and offering you drinks as the driver headed to Kiyoomi’s farmhouse.
“I’m sorry you had to deal with my mother. She can be quite persuasive.”
You looked back at Kiyoomi. You had been staring at all the billboards of Kanami; commercial ads, movie promotions, and the like. It stunned you again how this loud and flashy woman was the mother of a silent, brooding man. Even now, he had himself glued to his seat, adamant to put distance between you both with his arms crossed against his chest. “I was delighted by her invitation,” you tell him, glancing outside the windows again at another huge billboard of Kanami eating local ramen noodles. ‘MUST TRY!’ it was captioned, and they colored her cheeks red from the spicy flavor. You chuckled. “Wow. She really is everywhere.”
Kiyoomi followed your gaze. “She’s Itachiyama’s darling,” he shrugged, and then leant forward until his elbows rested on his knees. Sheepish wasn’t a word you would use to describe the Second Prince, but he definitely looked like it right now. “I must let you know, my mother didn’t invite you to visit just because she felt like it. She… well, she wanted you to somehow see Itachiyama as your home.”
“But I already have a home.”
“Yes, but she is fond of you, and she’s delusional that you should’ve been married to me,” he scratched his cheek, purposefully avoiding your gaze. Then, his cheeks flushed red, and you felt heat crawling on your neck at the implication of his words. “Sorry. That was awkward.”
“It’s fine. You are a great man, so it’s not like being married to you sounds entirely bad.”
“Definitely beats being married to my brother.”
“I guess so,” you chuckled, expelling any thoughts of being married to Kiyoomi instead. It wasn’t such a bad thing, to be honest. He was tall, handsome, and respectful. All of the Princess were good-looking in their own ways, but Prince Kiyoomi held the type of regal beauty that you would have oil portraits of hanging on the entrance of your home. He was large, stood tall and imposing, but never did he actually make you feel small or irrelevant. And even with his mysterious and silent demeanor, his intimidating features did little to hide his humble and bashful nature underneath. Which you found adorable, but you would never say it out loud. Instead, you watched as a crowd gathered in the middle of the city. Children ran around laughing, and parents bought trinkets from the stalls set up at the edge of the road.
“What is that?”
“A culture festival. They hold it annually around this time of the year to welcome autumn and give thanks for prosperous harvests. It’s called Kōyō no Matsuri, or ‘Festival of the Changing Leaves.’ It lasts about eight days where the farmers come together and celebrate.”
Unable to contain your excitement, you pressed your palms against the window. “I heard about this from the Crown Prince. Something about Itachiyama being one of the main suppliers of harvest and livestock?”
“We’re mostly a farmer country, whilst Inarizaki is the more advanced and modern one. It’s mostly to do with how our terrain is just richer in natural riches, while Inarizaki boasts in academics and politics,” he informed, “On the third day of the festival, the farmers visit some shrines to offer thanks for their harvest, and on the fifth day, they gather around the old temples and castles before Itachiyama and Inarizaki were split into two.”
“Wow. I hadn’t known your country would be so rich with history.”
“Technically, both countries share the same history. They just took separate paths at the end of it all.”
Pushing yourself off from the window, the driver drove past from the festival commotion until more trees surrounded you. You figured you’d left the city and now travelled somewhere more remote – fitting for where Kiyoomi lived.
“Do you like it better here?”
“Yes. It’s much quieter, and here, people don’t care too much on how I’m supposed to act as a Prince. I’m not their Prince, after all. I’m just a half-blood who happened to be their spokesperson.”
Something about his tone told you there was more he wanted to say, but chose not to. You pondered over it – how the Princes were so different. Some loved their titles and basked in their wealth, while some took their duties seriously to serve their people better. And then there was Rintaro, who was nearly crushed by the pressure to become better than Ushijima, and Kiyoomi… Kiyoomi, who remains an enigma to you. From what you heard about the Second Prince, people called him lazy, rarely attending meetings and showing up only when needed. It made you wonder how he was like as a little boy, who probably just wanted to live normally and in quiet, but because he was a Prince, he had to become someone else entirely.
Letting it go, you decided to change the topic. You were certain the Prince would share more with you about himself when he was ready.
“Your Highness, I would love to attend the festival.”
“Really?” his brows raised, and your eyes caught the motion of his vertical moles following the movement. “I mean, you can, but there would be lots of people. Wouldn’t you rather rest?”
“I’ve been doing nothing but rest the past few days. It would be nice to go out and do something. Besides, I wish to know more about your people.” And you meant it. You were barely a few hours in Itachiyama, but it already reminded you of the peaceful Greenville where you were raised. Itachiyama was starting to feel like home, like Kanami hoped.
Across you, you remained unaware of the Prince’s soft smile.
“I see. I shall take you to the festival tonight.”
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Seeing as Kanami still had her schedule filled, you and Kiyoomi had the rest of the day to yourselves until she returned. His mother did his best to welcome you, though, even in her absence. When you arrived at Kiyoomi’s farmhouse, she had already left you a bouquet of roses and a handwritten card telling you how happy she was her ‘daughter’ was now in her home country. It made your heart soften, even more so when she lent you a black-and-yellow floral yukata for tonight’s festival.
“You look nice,” Kiyoomi commented when you descended from the stairs, some flower pins in your hair. Overall, you felt pretty. It felt nice to be out of corsets and long-sleeved dresses. You could tell Kiyoomi approved too, as his eyes lit up, but his lips remained the same with an impassive expression. Offering his arm, you gladly took it, letting him lead you out and into the awaiting chauffeur. “Did my mother tell you to wear that?”
“She did. She said it would be more appropriate to wear traditional clothing fitting for the festival,” you gave a little twirl, and Kiyoomi’s lips curled by the slightest. It was enough to make you happy, and you were practically bouncing in your seat as the city lights came into view. Kiyoomi’s farmhouse rested on the countryside; surrounded by nothing but hills and endless amounts of grass. Signal couldn’t reach there, too, so you left your phone behind.
Tonight, you would simply enjoy this trip.
“Do you attend often?”
“When I can, yes, but… It’s a rather intimate celebration for the farmers, and I feel like I don’t do much for them, so I mostly sit out at home.”
“But you are a farmer, too, aren’t you?”
His eyes narrowed, but the reddening of his ears told you it was more of embarrassment. “Who told you that?”
“Your mother,” you chuckled. Once you’d arrived at the city, and the driver had parked somewhere else, you looped your arm around Kiyoomi’s and ventured into the heart of thefestival. “And I’m not stupid – you live in a farmhouse and have your own barn. I just never thought you would be the nature type.”
“There are lots you don’t know about me.”
“I can always learn.”
Kiyoomi’s gaze casted downwards. You couldn’t read his expression; he was always so guarded. But before you could contemplate on it further, you were swept up in the festivities. Everyone around you wore a yukata, and young couples held hands while wearing matching bracelets. Kiyoomi had told you those bracelets were special only for this festival, that the symbol of the moon was to pay respects to the Heavens for the blessings they bestow. Parents also joined in the night, with their children eating caramelized apples, and other candies. Mostly, the stalls offered food from their harvests such as roasted chestnuts, rice cakes, and pumpkin dishes. There was such a strong sense of community within the people that you were overwhelmed – Inarizaki didn’t feel as homely as Itachiyama.
An hour later, your stomach was well beyond full. You’d tasted and tried everything the farmers and their wives made. And when they saw the delighted way you closed your eyes and moaned at the delicacies, they offered you more and more. Kiyoomi paid for everything despite your protests, saying he was the host, and your only job for tonight was to enjoy.
Well, you surely wouldn’t complain.
Once you’d eaten your fill, and purchased a fox mask that matched your yukata, a group of young men started banging their drums. A woman played her flute effortlessly even behind her crow mask. Beside her, more people in matching crow masks sang in a foreign language. It sounded like a serenade; something about the voices were sweet, calling out to you like you were being seduced, and the hypnotic beats of the drum made your hips sway. But the most shocking part of it all was when people began to join in and held their partners, bumping their masks as if they were kissing, their hands squeezing each other’s waists and chanting along to the song.
You were mesmerized.
“That’s the Harvesting Dance,” Kiyoomi whispered in your ear, “They dance in hopes to bring joy to the ancestral spirits for blessing them with good harvest this year.”
“Must it always be a man and a woman?”
“It’s… an intimate dance,” he struggled to let out, and you craned your head towards him. He’d bought himself a fox mask to match yours, claiming he’d feel more comfortable if people didn’t recognize him. “Like the union of man and woman, they have become one with the ancestral spirits. It’s a time for reconnecting to their old ways, and showing gratitude for the family they’ve been given. And, uhm…” he scratched the back of his ears, which had turned pinkish again, “Well, it’s not just about harvest, really. It is also a dance for fertile crops and fertile wombs.”
Realization dawned on you.
“Oh!”
“It is a newly married couple’s tradition to participate in the dance.”
You nodded at the information, feeling both flustered and entertained at the Prince’s bashfulness. You almost wanted to tease him more about it until you were dragged by a young woman, her male partner already waiting for her in the middle of the dance. She rotated her hips in a circle and jumped to the beat, head thrown back in laughter. You couldn’t help but laugh with her, too – her laugh was contagious, and Kiyoomi was right. There was a sense of freedom when people didn’t know who you were.
“You lovebirds! Don’t miss out on the dance, unless you want the ancestral spirits to take away your virility!”
“Oh, thank you, but–”
“You are newly married, are you not?”
“I am, but–”
“Then come dance so you may be blessed with many healthy offspring!”
Sending a halfhearted apologetic smile to Prince, you dragged him with you. You realized he couldn’t see you, exactly, but your eyes were crinkled enough from your joy. He grumbled a bit, but otherwise didn’t complain. When the music played again, you mimicked the locals’ movements and giggled so hard your stomach hurt. Some of the steps were suggestive – a flirty brush of your knuckles on Kiyoomi’s chest, or him rubbing his mask tenderly at the sensitive spot of your neck. Through it all, you had to remain connected to each other. It was hard to tell who held who tighter – Kiyoomi had his hands planted on your hips with a deliciously vice-tight grip, and the fronts of his kimono had been undone by your teasing, restless hands.
You now understood why the dance encouraged fertility. There was so much seduction with only just your bodies, with no words needing to be spoken. And you couldn’t help but wonder – is this the way to Kiyoomi’s heart? Because he is not the best with words, so you had to touch him at all the right places?
You received your answer when the drums came to a crescendo before immediately halting. Like a growing orgasm, until it exploded from within, and you found yourself pressed up against Kiyoomi’s. Pressed close enough that his breathing matched yours. His eyes, already dark, grew impossibly darker.
“That was fun!” you bumped your mask with his, breathing hard underneath. “Has anyone told you you’re a great dancer?”
The Prince snorted. “I would be surprised if I wasn’t. I spent the good half of my childhood enduring dance lessons, thanks to my mother.”
You laughed hard at that. Already, this was becoming one of the best nights of your life. Back in Inarizaki, you didn’t go out much to socialize. All the other unmarried ladies seemed to be well-versed in charismatic social skills and effortlessly landed a husband within months after their debut into society. You, on the other hand, having grown up as an only child with busy parents, had no one to talk to. You stuttered a lot, and always stumbled on your own thoughts when voicing them out loud. It truly was a surprise to everyone that the Crown Prince found you interesting – even if that seemed a lifetime ago.
But you supposed you really weren’t the same person anymore. Because if you were still the same shy, bumbling young woman from years ago, you wouldn’t be here in Itachiyama, laughing without a care in the world with a handsome Prince at your side. He’d bought you more trinkets, and another set to gift to your mother when you returned home. You found it incredibly sweet, but of course, Kiyoomi only grumbled in embarrassment when you told him about it.
By the time Kiyoomi’s arms were filled with shopping bags, the crowd began to lessen. It was getting late, yet you were in no hurry, walking at a snail’s pace along the closed roads.
Silently hoping this moment would last forever.
“Your homeland is beautiful, Your Highness.”
“Thank you,” he said, and his brows furrowed deep in thought – as if hesitating. “They end tonight’s celebration with a Lantern Lighting Ceremony. Would you like to see?”
Your jaw dropped. Can this night get any better?
“I would love to!”
Since some of Kiyoomi and your security were still discreetly following, he handed them the bags before leading you away from the roads and near a lake, just beside the heart of the city. There, floating hydrangeas decorated the water, looking like it came out of a painting. Lanterns were already being lit up from where you stood – some with a rented wooden boat, and the rest content to just remaining in the concrete pavement, their hands weaved together as they mumbled themselves.
You turned to Kiyoomi in question. “It works like a birthday wish,” he explained, politely bowing to the old man who sold lanterns and match sticks. “You say your greatest desire, and then you let go of the lantern. The ancestral spirits will hear of your prayer and grant it to you.”
Doing as he said, you close your eyes. You could hear Kiyoomi lighting the match as he lit up the lantern, and you wished for more of this – more joyful, peaceful nights. It seemed like a simple wish, but with your current predicament, you had to jump at any chance of luck you could get. After all, you would have to leave Itachiyama someday. Your life wasn’t always going to be like this – of dances, of candied apples, of lighting lanterns and simply feeling alive. Because you knew once you returned home, reality would set in. So you prayed, and desperately wished, to experience happiness.
Satisfied, you cracked your eyes open, beaming at how the golden lantern burned even brighter in Kiyoomi’s large hands. Seriously, his hands were so big and his fingers long he almost encompassed the entire paper globe. However, he only had his eyes on you, his expression somber and lips tight – almost as if he knew you had wished for something impossible, and he, too, wanted your wish to come true.
“Did you wish for anything?”
“No.” He shook his head, “I already have everything I could need. The farmers need the prayers more than I do.” Again, you were stunned by the Prince’s thoughtfulness. He turned to you to ask if you were ready to let go of the lantern, and you nodded, the both of you watching as it soared up high in the sky – the dark night decorated with a hundred little lanterns like stars rising from the lake.
It was pure magic.
“Whatever it is you wished for,” Kiyoomi mumbled, “I hope it will come true.”
Your lips wobbled. “I hope so too.”
He nodded, feeling awkward once more, and you nearly laughed. The Prince clearly wasn’t great at dealing with genuine emotions. “Are you tired? We can return home already.”
“I’d like to walk on the way back to the car. I don’t want the night to end just yet.”
Kiyoomi wasn’t against your idea. You shared the silence in peace, gratitude and pure, unabashed happiness blooming from within your chest. You suddenly missed your mother; wishing you could’ve taken her with you. She would’ve loved it here. She would shamelessly do the Harvesting Dance with your father, because they were still enamored with one another even after years of marriage. They were the reason you believed in true love and hoped to have it for yourself. But alas, fate had different plans for you.
It had made you fall in love with the wrong person and made you a Princess in the aftermath.
Sneaking a glance at Kiyoomi, you noticed he’d already taken off his mask. His handsome features were bathed in the moonlight, making him look even more ethereal than he already was. His features, strong, and dark, and sharp, yet his lips were curved so softly, his dark eyes nothing but tender and patient.
He held none of the malice or greed the other Princes had.
“Do you enjoy being Prince, Your Highness?” you blurted after a while, because talking seemed to be the better option than ogling at his beauty. No, you couldn’t do that. You were both married to someone else – and you would rather lose your title than be unfaithful like Rintaro.
Rintaro. Just the thought of his name soured your mood.
“Not quite,” he admitted, “It isn’t as grand as it sounds. There are lots of things to do, and a myriad of rules to follow. But I still think this responsibility bestowed on me is an honor. After all, not everyone has the privilege to be born with a purpose. Many people spend the rest of their lives looking for it, but mine was handed in a silver platter.”
“Hm. I never thought of it that way. I… I always thought you hated being Prince.”
“I do not despite it, but neither do I like it.”
“What would you be doing, then, if you were born as a commoner?”
He side eyed you, a hint of a smile appearing on his face. “Farming.”
You both laughed. Of course that was his answer. “Why am I not surprised by that?”
“What about you?” he asked, tilting his head to the side and briefly glancing at the fat, extravagant ring on your finger. The sight of it made him wince, but he schooled his face into impassiveness before you could think about it. In return, you searched for his wedding ring too, frowning upon the realization he hadn’t worn it. “What would you be doing if you hadn’t married my brother?”
“Hmm… Managing the household… learning the business, although if you ask me, I really would have wanted to get married, regardless if it was to a royal or not. In fact, I never even dreamt of being a Princess. It just never seemed to be possible for me.”
“You’re a great Princess,” he commended, and that warmth blooming in your chest had fully sparked. “Who would you have married, then?”
“Anyone who loved me and cherished me,” you scrunched up your nose, feeling bashful. “I am quite the simpleton, aren’t I?”
“There is nothing wrong with wanting simple things.”
His words held nothing but sincerity. Coming from a Prince who didn’t indulge in the lavishness he could have with his life, and opted for farming instead, you believed him. And it felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulder, like a breath you’d been holding had been released. Kiyoomi was like a breath of fresh air. He was so different from his brothers – so detached from the crown, yet so connected to the world and its humble gifts. Kita was different, too, but he held a sharp edge to him. He wielded his intelligence and knowledge like a weapon, because living anywhere near the throne was a battle in itself, but Kiyoomi was just… different.
In a world of polished gems, he shone brightly as a raw diamond.
“Your Highness, I… I know most of royal marriages are arranged, and rarely does it happen out of love, but why Iris? You are the second Prince. Anyone of you could have had anyone you wanted, and Iris didn’t seem wealthy or influential enough to be a royal spouse candidate. Why her?”
“Because she’s from Itachiyama.”
“That’s it?”
Kiyoomi licked his lips, thinking about his answer before he spoke them. “You are aware I’m the only son with a foreign mother. When I was born, they saw potential in me, to possibly unite the two territories into one again. But I was aloof, and liked to keep to myself, so I lacked in that department. When Iris had been presented to the Queen by her mother and they pledged their loyalty to the throne, she was made a royal scholar,” he glanced at you, gauging for your reaction. “You are right that she isn’t anyone’s first choice to be a Prince’s wife. She comes from a common family with nothing to her name. But she is intelligent, and she has always shown dedication to the throne. That was enough to convince the Queen we were the most sensible pair.”
“And is it working? Are we being united to your homeland?”
“No. Iris has barely stepped foot in Itachiyama,” This time, Kiyoomi turned away from you and licked his lips. “She mostly does work at the Palace.”
“Because Rintaro is there?”
“Precisely.” You knew he would answer that, but the image popping in your head was unkind – of Iris and Rintaro making love to one another while you weren’t around.
“Do you love her? Or hold affection for her, in the very least?”
“Not at all. I never wanted to marry, and my opinion of her hasn’t changed since we married,” the determination in his voice surprised you, a hardness settling over his features. “Royal marriages are always done with a political purpose, Princess. It was, and never will be, out of love.”
The conversation died at that. You didn’t press further, either, because you knew Kiyoomi hadn’t said those words to hurt you. He only meant to remind you. And you were thankful, because he chose to be honest, albeit cruelly, when everyone else made you a fool – a weak fool who had to be fed lies because people believed you wouldn’t be able to stomach the truth. Perhaps they were right, perhaps you were weak, but Kiyoomi didn’t look at you like that. He only looked at you like he despised everyone for even lying, or keeping secrets, and he’d made it his mission to be truthful.
Truly, your unexpected friendship with the Prince had been the greatest gift.
“Thank you for the lovely evening, Your Highness,” you bowed to him, quite ready to retreat back into the guest room once you’d reached his farmhouse.
“It was my pleasure,” he returned the bow, yet remained frozen at the bottom of the staircase, tongue darting out to lick at his lower lip nervously. “Oh, and Princess? Would you… come and like to meet my horses tomorrow? I think you would like them.”
Somehow, the thought of Kiyoomi introducing his horses to you, and nerding out about them, put a smile on your face. Getting to know the Princes was like unwrapping a gift – you never know if you would like what was inside. But you most definitely liked Kiyoomi, and you remained true to your word that you would learn everything about him. His horses, his history, the contents of his heart, and every inch of his farmhouse and barn if he would let you.
“I would love to.”
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You couldn’t stop tossing and turning in your bed.
Today’s events still played on your mind like a loop. The festivities, the freedom that came with anonymity, the connection of the citizens to their culture and history – you realized they were so different from Inarizaki. Inarizaki had its great parts, too, like their dedication to the monarchy and the power they held. It was a country known for having many scholars as the academe was greatly funded by the monarchs, but somehow it always felt… detached. Detached from nature, detached from the basic aspects of humanity.
Inarizaki cared about greatness, and so did its people. It was the sole reason why they had such strict customs and adhered to the law like their life depended on it. Itachiyama was different. They weren’t the most advanced – their buildings not as tall, their country mostly surrounded by beaches or forests, with their people preferring the old ways. Yet somehow, you felt more at home here.
It reminded you of Greenville and summers spent chasing dragonflies and lying on the grass to sunbathe.
It reminded you of a childhood long gone.
Sighing to yourself, you slipped out of the covers. The clock read it was just quarter past two am. Kiyoomi’s staff were already asleep, and you were certain each footstep you took would cause the floorboards to creak. Still, there was only so little you could do in your room. The TV didn’t have cable, Kiyoomi wasn’t interested in having Wi-Fi, and the place was rather empty of anything that could entertain you.
Surely a little exploring wouldn’t hurt, though. Slipping your arms into your robe, you tied it around your waist and exited your room. The hallways were dark and empty, and you held your breath, tiptoeing around the halls. You didn’t know why you were so nervous to be caught. It wasn’t like you were doing something wrong, although you did look suspicious turning every knob and groaning when none opened.
What was the point of all these rooms if you couldn’t enter them?
Walking around, you studied every bit of Kiyoomi’s farmhouse. It was grand in size, and nothing about the chandeliers and marble floors were the least bit modest, but it felt homey. There were knick-knacks everywhere, messy childhood paintings and poorly drawn stick-figures hung up on the wall. Upon closer look, you saw Tobio and Tooru scribbled upon the drawings. Smiling to yourself, you took it all greedily – the lack of family pictures replaced by these artworks, the fresh flowers with Kanami’s name tagged on a card lovingly taken care of, and a single portrait of Kanami with a younger Kiyoomi on her lap.
You could imagine how once in the past, the brothers spent many nights in this house, ran around chasing each other with their high-pitched squeals.
They were boys before they became Princes.
They were brothers before they were rivals.
Your hands reached out for the drawings. Even Shinsuke’s was there, and to no one’s surprise, his was the best. The colors were always within the lines, and he had clean, smooth strokes of his brush. Keiji’s was second best, but his looked more like scribbles and sketches than a polished end result. Ushijima didn’t have any drawings, but a certain stick figure drawing from a little Tobio counted eight brothers holding hands. ‘Brothers forever’, he scrawled underneath, causing your heart to ache.
He hadn’t included Rintaro in the picture.
Letting go of the drawings with a frown, you took a step back and collided with something solid. You gasped, a scream nearly torn out your throat when you studied the figure now standing in front of you. Broad shouldered, with unruly curls surrounding his face, and his head tilted to the side in confusion – Prince Kiyoomi looked like a dream come true. One shouldn’t look this ethereal in the dark hallways of his house, with nothing but the moonlight slipping through the glass windows illuminating the sharpness of his cheekbones.
He stood so still and quiet you couldn’t hear him breathe. Had he been here for a while?
You placed a hand to calm your racing heart. “Your Highness. I’m sorry, I didn’t know you’d still be awake.”
“It’s okay,” he mumbles, looking past you and to the drawings just as his brows pinched together. “I didn’t know you’d be awake, too. Is your room not to your liking?”
“Oh, no, no, it is. I’m just…”
“Feeling homesick?”
“Not quite,” you scrunched your nose, “Today was just amazing. I’m still reeling from the joy of it all.”
He nodded, seemingly lost in his own thoughts. You watched him have an inner debate before he nodded again, gesturing to the staircase. “Follow me. There’s something I’d like to show you.”
The Prince led you to the hallway where his room and Kanami’s was located whenever she visited. At the end of the hall stood two grand double doors that could only be opened by a key from his pocket. The doors squeaked as it open, and you both coughed as dust fluttered through the space. Clearly, it hadn’t been used in a while, but that mattered little when he switched on the lights. Rows upon rows of books stood tall enough to nearly hit the ceiling. The room had a dome-shaped structure, with the walls carved in to make more spaces as bookshelves. In the middle sat a velvet red couch with a wooden table decorated with a vase of flowers. However, it wasn’t the books that took your breath away – it was the grand spiraling chandelier that slowly flickered to life like candles being lit, bathing the room in a warm, soothing light.
Unable to help yourself, you stepped inside, jaw dropped at the beauty of it all.
“This is my library.”
“This is marvelous,” you chuckled out, breathily, running your fingers over the spines of the books. They were covered in dust, but otherwise in pristine conditions. Most of them were classic collections too – the types of books you would only find in antique shops. And was that an official journal from an ancient royal? You couldn’t believe what you were seeing. This couldn’t be just a personal collection – these had to be an official record room.
“Are these all yours?”
“Some of it were my father’s. His Majesty liked to read.”
You glanced at Kiyoomi from under your lashes. He stood at an arm’s length away from you, casually leaning against the bookshelf whilst you pull out a random book. The Anthology of the First King, it read.
“You’re the first Prince who ever spoke of him.”
Kiyoomi’s gaze flittered over yours, from your fingers caressing the ancient book delicately, to the way a smile graced your face upon inhaling that addicting old book smell. His voice, if possible, grew quieter. “I know my brothers all dislike him, and I don’t blame them,” he continued, “But His Majesty raised me as best as he could. It may have been because of the power I could wield as a foreigner, but he came here often. He was the reason I grew up with a fondness for books.”
You hadn’t heard of that before. As far as you knew, the late King seemed absent in all of his son’s lives, but then again, the royal family had always been a complexity.
Turning away from the historical section, you beamed at the Prince. “Well, this is quite an impressive collection. His Majesty has taste.”
Kiyoomi fought back a smile. The gesture shouldn’t have looked as adorable as it did, and now you were fighting back a smile, too. You liked him this way – you like him much better here in Itachiyama. Whenever he was at the Palace, you could see the walls he surrounded himself with, how he closed himself from the world. But here? Here, he was just a man eager to talk about the things he loved, and you eagerly followed him when he gestured you to.
“This is my section,” he pointed to a rack spanning from floor to ceiling, then to the shelves next to it. “And that is Tooru’s. The one at the back is Keiji’s.”
Tooru’s section was… surprising, to say the least. He had all of Shakespeare’s books, with a multitude of romance and tragedy novels. His books looked to be the most loved out of everything you’d seen – with cracked spines, folded paper edges, and annotations on the pages. “Tooru’s? These are all romance novels.”
“It may be hard to believe, but he is a hopeless romantic,” Kiyoomi snickered, “Keiji, on the other hand, loves to read historical fiction. And don’t tell him I told you this, but he wrote three of these books here.”
“He’s a writer?!”
“A splendid one,” he boasted, pulling out a book titled The Fall of Belle. “He wrote this about Belleview Manor when he was eighteen. Belleview was notorious for housing the most, er, complicated royals, you see. He was inspired by it and turned it to a kingdom, writing something about soldiers and poets and kings. It’s a really good novel. I highly recommend you read it.”
Kiyoomi was already shoving Keiji’s novels into your arms before you could say anything. Next to Keiji’s was Shinsuke’s collection – unsurprisingly again, were mostly textbooks. The Itachiyaman Law, the Governance, the History of Inarizaki, The Fall of the Union. You weren’t too interested, so you moved onto the next shelves and blinked back at what you saw.
Beside you, the Prince cleared his throat in an attempt to hold back a smile. “That is Tobio’s section.”
“These are… balls.”
Instead of books placed on the shelves, they were balls, all held up carefully by expensive looking holders. Each one of them had signatures written on them with markers, along with a tag underneath of several dates. “Volleyballs, yes. He had these signed by his favorite players, and those are the dates of the matches,” he explained, slowly moving behind you until you could feel the heat radiating off of him. Looking up at the Prince, you saw he wasn’t looking at you, but rather at the sports equipment with what seemed like fondness, and regret, in his eyes.
“He’s always loved playing sports as a child. He was rather good at it, too. Shame he couldn’t go pro.”
“Because he’s a Prince?”
Kiyoomi nodded. “He may be the youngest, but that doesn’t mean he’s freed from his duties. The Queen knows the kingdom loves him so she has quite a grand plan for Tobio to start tours by himself and see if he’d be more successful in establishing connections with others,” shaking his head, the Prince closed his eyes. “He may marry soon, too.”
“He’s too young to be married.”
“He isn’t that young, but I know what you mean,” he said, “Although I think Tobio will find it the hardest to marry out of every one of us.”
“Why so?”
Kiyoomi shrugged. “He’s a romantic. Not like Tooru in the sense that he would recite Shakespeare’s sonnet to seduce a woman he likes, but in the sense that he still innocently believes he can marry someone of his choosing. That’d only work if she was a noblewoman, though. Otherwise he might experience the same fate as Shinsuke.”
Ah. Shinsuke and his maid – a tragedy in the making.
You looked away from Kiyoomi. Shuffling the books in your arms, you shuffled to the lone seat in the room and plopped down on it, wincing when your arms ached from the weight. “You know a lot about your brothers.”
“I’ve spent a long time watching them,” he confessed, and the sofa dipped beside you. He leant back against it, his long legs crossing over the other as he tilted his head back, watching what little he could of the stars visible from the dome-like ceiling. “It wasn’t always like this. There was a point in our lives we used to be closer and didn’t care too much about the throne.”
“Who were you closest with?”
“Tooru and Keiji. They both loved reading, and so did I. I wasn’t very close with the younger ones because they were rambunctious, especially the twins. But I like Tobio a lot,” he smiled, albeit sadly. “I hope the crown never fails him. I would do anything to ensure he stays unaffected by the harshness of it.”
“He’s a precious boy,” you agreed, and then thought back to the drawings in Kiyoomi’s living room. Biting your lip, you suddenly stood up and headed for the last shelf at the end of the room. Silently hoping, wishing, it was Rintaro’s section. Behind you, you heard the Prince shuffle on his feet as he followed you around. “And… Rintaro? Were you close with him back then, too?”
You already expected the answer, but it didn’t disappoint you any less when you heard it.
“No. The Queen always kept him isolated. I rarely saw him growing up, but on the few times I did, he always looked like he wanted to play with us. He wasn’t allowed, though. Her Majesty was… eerily wary of him getting too close with his brothers,” Kiyoomi let on, his handsome face contorting to that of discomfort when you blankly stared at him. Then, his ears reddened, and he coughed out of nowhere, his large palm covering his mouth. “I fear I may have talked too much. Please, look around. I’m sure you’ll find something you’ll like.”
Happy to do so, you left no inch and corner of the library unturned. Tooru had the most interesting collection with his romance novels, but you found Keiji’s section to be the most curious. A moment later, you had a dozen books stacked on top of each other at the nearby table. You just wanted one more – a book about Tobio’s favorite sport so you could ask the sweet Prince about it when you returned home.
Unfortunately, the first five rows of Tobio’s shelf consisted of his signed volleyballs, and his books sat at the top ones. You had to stand on your tiptoes, only for your fingers to barely graze the spine of it. Damn it. Taking your slippers off, you bunched your nightgown and robe in your hand and used your free arm to hoist yourself up. Your feet landed on the wooden boards of the shelf as you struggled to reach for A Dummy’s Guide to Volleyball when your foot slipped.
The ground disappeared beneath you.
Gravity consumed you as you fell, the book you’d been reaching for sliding out of its place and nearly knocking into your forehead. But it never came. Your face never smacked the ground, and your bum seemed safe, too. Instead, strong arms wrapped around your waist until you landed on a hard body with an ‘oof’, the breath knocked out of your windpipe.
Kiyoomi groaned underneath you.
Gasping, you realized you’d accidentally elbowed him in the chest. The poor prince had turned red in the face as he struggled to breathe, and you hoisted yourself up to move yourself out of the way, realizing a little too late how little you wore. Or how thin your nightgown was. Or how you didn’t wear a bra to sleep and forgot to wear one when you left the room, and now your hardened nipples were brushing against his chest. Underneath you, Kiyoomi inhaled in sharply, his dark eyes darting from your cleavage and to the books – the movement so fast you wondered if he had whiplash.
You froze. This was… quite a predicament to be in.
If you slid your body upward, your lace panties would brush against his crotch. If you slid yourself downwards, you’d graze your sensitive nipples on his silk blouse. But if you slid sideways, that would mean you had to rise your upper body to get your knees to stop straddling him, and he’d have an even closer view of your breasts.
In conclusion, nothing would work.
“Let me, just, uh, move,” the Prince groaned beneath you, and you nodded fervently. He could do whatever he wanted at this point as long as it meant you’d both be separated. However, luck was not on his side either. As soon as the Prince gripped your hips to lift you off of him, his hips rose on instinct, accidentally thrusting into you.
The Prince stopped breathing, and so did you.
Within the blink of an eye, the Prince had torn you off his body – and he was suddenly at the other side of the room. Color drained from his face just as his skin from the neck down blistered red, the poor Prince snatching a nearby book to hide the growing tent in his pants.
“My apologies,” he blurted out, looking at everywhere but you. “I didn’t – I didn’t mean to.”
“It’s okay,” standing up, you dusted yourself off and wobbled on your feet. Great. Your legs felt weak, and your voice didn’t come out as confident and composed as you liked it to be. Rather, you were both breathless – and you couldn’t tell if it was from the adrenaline, or the delicious way his body molded to yours.
A pleasure you would not be thinking of. Ever. Again.
“Uhm. Thank you. Your library is really nice.”
The Prince nodded, taking his lips between his teeth. “I should, uh. I should go.”
“Yes, that might be for the best,” you croaked out, and just like that, the Prince was gone. The heavy slamming of the doors was the last thing you heard before you were engulfed in a deafening silence.
That night, you did not get any sleep at all.
And you were restless for all the wrong reasons.
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Chiori and Yae with a reader that tries to slack off all the time
characters: Chiori / Yae Miko x gn!reader (separate)
a/n: Chiori is such an asshole and I absolutely adore her. She’s like if they gave Stannis Baratheon hair and a second sword.
(I wrote this like... 2 months ago and finally finished it. A total henry move to write 90% of smth and then let it rot in my WIP folder for months, if you ask me.)
Anyway, hope you enjoy!
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Chiori
While the two of you matched when it came to radiating calm energy, the way they came out in quite contrasting ways. Where the Seamstress worked hard at following her passions, you were easygoing, where she was direct and brutally honest, you were charming and always said what the other party wanted to hear. Where she was Chiori, you were you.
So when you once again found yourself in her Boutique, chatting away with customers and somehow managing to make them spend more than they had planned, only to up and vanish from one moment to the next, Chiori couldn’t help but feel like she had an inkling of an idea to as were she would find you.
“What are you doing here?”, Chiori’s voice suddenly rang out, waking you from your slumber as you slowly looked up at her, your eyes still half closed and yet still managing to make out the vexed look on her face.
“I was taking a small break. Do you need me for something, Chiori?” you asked in a completely innocent tone, an unwavering smile plastered on your face as she stared you down before signaling to the once locked door.
“And where did you get the keys for the room?”
“They were in the door, so I let myself in. Oh- Was I not supposed to go here?” You realized with widened eyes, glancing between her and the door before shooting her an apologetic smile.
“Yeah no, don’t do that again. The next time you want to take a nap, do it at home”, came her response almost immediately.
Putting the whole “sneaking off and going into a locked room to take a nap away from people” situation aside, what annoyed Chiori even more was how impossible to read you were. If she was sure you were lying to her, she’d have thrown you out long ago. Were you really clueless enough to let yourself into a room or were you simply playing dumb? 
“Ugh. If you want to stand around and do nothing, come with me. I’m in need of a model right now.”
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Yae Miko
While you were certainly far from being as lethargic as a certain ninja-girl loitering around the shrine every so often, you had your moments of supreme languidness. And while there were times she felt the urge to help you out by giving you a bit of motivation to get your day started, more often than not, Yae found herself amused by the lengths you took to go unnoticed by your superiors.
“Oh my, you look exhausted. You must have been working hard to get all of this paperwork finished. I do hope I’m not being a nuisance right now”, Yae observed as she entered the room, her voice both soft in nature while masking her mischievous intentions, letting herself into your office only to see you half-slumped over your desk with finished paperwork surrounding you.
That being said, Yae had no doubt it didn’t take you as long as your dramatic rendition of an exhausted warrior would suggest, considering the clever ways you found to make your work easier. So often had you inadvertently impressed her with your way of working that she wouldn’t put it past you to reinvent the wheel if it could shave off a few seconds from your work.
“No, I just now finished my work”, you were quick to soothe her worries, and yet by the way you rubbed your eyes awake, the Kitsune couldn’t help but doubt your words.
As expected, you had learned from your mistakes. The last time you were caught finishing early, you got a few sentences of praise and an extra load of work, the way your self-satisfied smile turned into one barely holding on as you tried to mask whatever emotions washed over you on the inside, being exactly the kind of subtle reactions she loved to watch people go through.
“You should know that you are truly a commendable employee. So, to reward you for your hard work, I should give you a promotion”, Yae spoke before shooting you a small smile as if to praise you, and yet by the time her words registered in your brain, your mouth was left hanging wide open.
“Thank you, but that’s really not necessary. I can think of a dozen people more suited than me-”
“You’re selling yourself short. I’m confident you’re more than qualified for the position”, Yae quickly cut you off, her expression unchanging as she slowly turned around. “Or… Is it that you do not want more work?” She added as her smile grew wider, barely hiding her enjoyment anymore.
“No… thank you”, you responded with a meek sigh, realizing the futility of fighting it.
Once you’d take a closer look at your new privileges and responsibilities, you’d surely realize that she made sure most of your new workload wouldn’t take nearly as long as your current one if handled in an intelligent manner, and yet, when she saw your current reaction, a part of her found herself hoping you wouldn’t realize anytime soon.
By the time Yae reached the door however, she found herself halting in her tracks, quietly humming to herself as she seemed to think about something before finally turning to face you once again.
“I do suppose you did work well today. Take the rest of the day off.”
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blondgirls-world · 3 days
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57 Reasons
TW: Meanspo
01. You will be FAT if you eat today, just put it off one more day.
02. You don't NEED food.
03. Fat people can't fit everywhere.
04. Guys will be able to pick you up without struggling.
05. You'll be able to run faster without all that extra weight holding you back.
06. People will remember you as "the beautiful thin one".
07. If someone has to describe you, they'll say "oh she weighs like 90, 100 lbs".
08. Guys will want to get to know you, not laugh at you and walk away.
09. Starving is an example of excellent willpower.
10. You will be able to see your beautiful, beautiful bones.
11. Bones are clean and pure. Fat is dirty and hangs on your bones like a parasite.
12. If you eat then you'll look like those disgusting, fat, ghetto and trailer-trash hookers on Jerry Springer.
13. The models that everyone claims are beautiful, the spitting image of perfection, are any of them fat? NO!
14. Too many people in the world are obese.
15. People who eat are selfish and unrealistic.
16. Only fat people are attracted to fat people. Do you want pigs to like you because you are one of them.
17. Anyone can have "inner beauty" but few can earn real beauty, inside as well as out.
18. You'll be able to move as quietly and skillfully as a spider.
19. Only thin people are graceful.
20. If you slap a fat person you can see a shockwave ripple over their skin. That's disgusting.
21. Do you want people to say "for gods sake get off me you're crushing me!!!" or "you are sooo light" ???
22. Underweight aka perfect body.
23. Ballerina? or beanbag?
24. I want to be light enough so a helium balloon could lift me and carry me to the clouds.
25. I want to walk in the snow and leave no footprints.
26. Starve off the parts you don't need. They're ugly and they drag you down.
27. Nothing cant be fixed with hunger and weight loss.
28. Saying "no thanks" to food is saying "yes please" to THIN!!!
29. Fat people are so huge, yet people look away from them as if they don't exist.
30. The only time people do notice a fat person is when they get in the way of that beautiful thin girl walking by (ok that sounds really horrible i know.)
31. Have you ever seen a person NOT notice a walking skeleton.
32. Nothing tastes as good as thin feels.
33. Is food more important that happiness in life? I think not!
34. Eating is conforming to everyone else's expectations.
35. When you start to get dizzy and weak you're almost there.
36. Hunger is your friend and it won't betray you like food.
37. Food is mean and sneaky. It tricks you into eating it and it works on you from the inside out making you fat, bloated, ugly and unhappy.
38. Think of anorexia as your secret weapon.
39. If you can name one reason to be fat, I'll name a million and one to be thin.
40. Thin people look good in ANY kind of clothes.
41. Food rots your teeth.
42. Puffy cheeks, double chins and thick ankles-- aren't attractive.
43. Fatty areas stretch and sag as you get older.
44. Ever seen the arms of a fat person wave hello or goodbye?
45. Eating little to nothing saves you money!
46. The average (middle class) American wastes OVER $8,000 a year on FOOD ALONE...it goes in one end and out the other. That sure is a lot of fat! No wonder so many Americans are obese and overweight!
47. Fat people make their country look bad.
48. Big people sweat more and they smell bad.
49. Fat people die earlier.
50. You'll be the envy of all the other girls.
51. All of the guys will want you.
52. You're less likely to get food poisoning.
53. You won't be exposed to all the chemicals and pesticides they put in food today.
54. You won't get sweaty on hot days.
55. The word fat will only apply to you in a sarcastic way.
56. No one wants to see a fat person dance.
57. Beauty Queen? or Dairy Queen?
-Fading Obsession: Pro Ana Mia Website plus Forum (fadingobsessions.com)
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sith-shenanigans · 3 days
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The thing about the Omelas story is that I don’t hate it, actually.
Don’t get me wrong. Usually, when I think about it, it drives me up a wall. I also—on the subject of responses to it—didn’t really like The Ones Who Stay And Fight. (Most of my reasons are said, better, in this article. Not the part about the tone, but that it shot for ambiguity and ended up in “somehow, the clearly magical power of child suffering made more sense than intolerance being a memetic virus that can only be solved through police murder.”) I’m fond of responding to trolley problems by asking who’s tying people to trolleys, and then insisting that it is morally relevant that someone tied those people to the tracks, because you wouldn’t be deciding who lives and who dies if someone hadn’t made the deliberate choice to put those people in mortal peril for no pressing reason.
(I like to think I’d save the five people. I think a lot of us would most likely panic and do something entirely unhelpful, and in practice, I have no idea if I’m one of them, because no one has ever tied anybody to a trolley track in front of me. It just hasn’t come up. But the ideal would be to save the five people. That’s not my answer in the organ-harvesting version, though, because it’s bad for everyone to live in a place where a surgeon can decide to kill you for your organs, no matter how many people doing it just this once would save.)
But I don’t dislike the story that Omelas came from. I don’t even dislike trolley problems, unless people are trying to insist that the context doesn’t matter. (The context always matters.) The problem is that everyone treats Omelas as a trolley problem. “Here’s a utopia where one innocent person has to suffer horribly. Is it worth it, to keep so many other people from suffering? Would you stay and be complicit, or would you walk out to go anywhere else?” The child is the central feature of Omelas, the only thing that matters. The child is nonnegotiable. You can’t rescue them, you can only walk away.
But the narrator did give us the chance to believe, before adding the child in.
Omelas is described to us as half place and half thought experiment, by a narrator that adds things as they go, a narrator that says this at close to the opening:
As they did without monarchy and slavery, so they also got on without the stock exchange, the advertisement, the secret police, and the bomb. Yet I repeat that these were not simple folk, not dulcet shepherds, noble savages, bland utopians. They were not less complex than us. The trouble is that we have a bad habit, encouraged by pedants and sophisticates, of considering happiness as something rather stupid. Only pain is intellectual, only evil interesting. This is the treason of the artist: a refusal to admit the banality of evil and the terrible boredom of pain. If you can't lick 'em, join 'em. If it hurts, repeat it. But to praise despair is to condemn delight, to embrace violence is to lose hold of everything else. We have almost lost hold; we can no longer describe a happy man, nor make any celebration of joy.
And goes on, in the narrative, to consider the reader’s opinion, to ask what they’ll believe.
I wish I could convince you. Omelas sounds in my words like a city in a fairy tale, long ago and far away, once upon a time. Perhaps it would be best if you imagined it as your own fancy bids, assuming it will rise to the occasion, for certainly I cannot suit you all. For instance, how about technology? I think that there would be no cars or helicopters in and above the streets; this follows from the fact that the people of Omelas are happy people. Happiness is based on a just discrimination of what is necessary, what is neither necessary nor destructive, and what is destructive. In the middle category, however – that of the unnecessary but undestructive, that of comfort, luxury, exuberance, etc. – they could perfectly well have central heating, subway trains, washing machines, and all kinds of marvelous devices not yet invented here, floating light-sources, fuelless power, a cure for the common cold. Or they could have none of that: it doesn't matter. As you like it.
[…]
But even granted trains, I fear that Omelas so far strikes some of you as goody-goody. Smiles, bells, parades, horses, bleh. If so, please add an orgy. If an orgy would help, don't hesitate. […] Surely the beautiful nudes can just wander about, offering themselves like divine souffles to the hunger of the needy and the rapture of the flesh. Let them join the processions. Let tambourines be struck above the copulations, and the glory of desire be proclaimed upon the gongs, and (a not unimportant point) let the offspring of these delightful rituals be beloved and looked after by all. One thing I know there is none of in Omelas is guilt. But what else should there be?
Omelas is a story being told to a listener, a utopia being described; the reader is an implied participant in a conversation, the narrator reacting to what they said where the page couldn’t hear. And so, after all of that, the narrator says:
Do you believe? Do you accept the festival, the city, the joy? No? Then let me describe one more thing.
And the narrator goes on to describe the child, the terrible price, the self-justifications that people employ. Because the listener doesn’t accept the festival, the city, the joy—only pain is intellectual, only evil interesting. So the narrator engages in “the treason of the artist” (if you can't lick 'em, join 'em) and regales us with the child’s sorry state.
[…] They know that they, like the child, are not free. They know compassion. It is the existence of the child, and their knowledge of its existence, that makes possible the nobility of their architecture, the poignancy of their music, the profundity of their science. It is because of the child that they are so gentle with children. They know that if the wretched one were not there snivelling in the dark, the other one, the flute-player, could make no joyful music as the young riders line up in their beauty for the race in the sunlight of the first morning of summer.
Now do you believe in them? Are they not more credible?
I don’t think we’re being asked, as readers, to consider whether it’s worth it, though it’s certainly something we can consider if we want. But the narrative seems quite clear that it isn’t: to praise despair is to condemn delight, to embrace violence is to lose hold of everything else. A description of Omelas, of why Omelas should be believed in, but how could that be anything but a condemnation of a city powered by a forsaken child?
And, of course, everyone wants to ask—why don’t we free the child, why don’t we comfort the child, why don’t we change things and take the risk of making everything worse? Why is the best thing we can do to walk away?
Because we needed the utopia to have suffering in it, to believe it. Because it couldn’t be real until there was a cost, a price, something cruel and unfair to balance out the scales. Something had to be wrong with Omelas, as the narrator spun it up before us. Yes, perhaps we could save the child, perhaps we could ruin everything, perhaps we could be heroes—wouldn’t that be nice? Wouldn’t that be the story we want, here, where someone is suffering and only we (who are of course more compassionate than everyone else) can fix it? That would make it a real utopia, if we could kick down the doors and fix everything ourselves.
But it would have been better to believe that Omelas could exist without someone suffering for it, when we were asked.
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annwrites · 2 days
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i think you needed me.
— pairing: billy hargrove x fem!reader
— type: ficlet (part of a series)
— summary: billy helps you with homework, you realize you have a crush, & yet another man enters the fold
— tags: billy trying to learn more about you, billy opening up about who he used to be
— tw: references to past sexual abuse/grooming of a minor, mentions of drugs, infidelity, implied abortion
— word count: 4,458
— a/n: going forward, this fic will be dealing in heavy material, like those referenced in the tw & more. sex scenes will be graphic & potentially triggering to some readers. putting it out there now, so some know to stop before following along any further with this post/series.
i hope this post seems okay. idk how i feel about writing billy this way. it feels ooc, bc he's so nice & mature, but he's supposed to be for this story, bc that's the kind of man reader desperately needs to lean on. idk. i think i just need to get more comfortable with characterizing him so differently than i did in my thoroughfare series.
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When Billy enters the house, he finds you to his left in the living room. Or, what is now serving as a poor excuse for one. You’re on the floor, lying on your stomach atop a light blue blanket, legs in the air behind you, waving back and forth as you work on what he assumes is homework.
You glance up to him for a moment, a pencil balanced atop your upper lip which is in a pout to keep it in-place and he smirks at the sight.
He holds up a plastic bag from a hardware store. “Brought you a new doorknob.”
You drop the writing utensil. “Does that one have a lock, too?”
“It does.”
You turn back to the textbook in front of you. “Good. Now you can replace the other one that you broke.”
His lip twitches. “Yes, ma’am.”
You roll your eyes. “Don’t call me that.”
He repeats the statement yet again before heading up.
A handful of minutes later, he comes back downstairs, seating himself on the cushion-less couch. “Done.”
You look back at him over your shoulder.
He lays an arm across the back of the couch. “What? Do you want to inspect my handiwork?”
You go back to your homework. “Not really. And you’re not getting paid, either.”
He chuckles. “I’d say that’s only fair, since it needing to be replaced at all is my fault to begin with.”
Both of you grow silent then and he leans forward, squinting, trying to get a look at whatever you’re working on. “Number four is wrong.”
He leans back again.
You don’t initially respond, telling yourself that he’s just picking on you. Or that you don’t really care if your decimal is in the wrong place, but you keep glancing back to the question. You sigh loudly then and he smiles in response. “So what’s the right answer, then?”
He shrugs. “You tell me, sweetheart.”
You don’t like him calling you that yet again. Scott is the only one who gets to call you by that term of endearment. Joe had tried it once—twice, maybe—and even if he scared the shit out of you, you made it clear that he could call you by anything else but that. He’d agreed easily, since his cock had just been buried in your warm, wet mouth—close to finishing. His mind was occupied with other things at the time than arguing over meaningless nicknames. He’d given you what you wanted—agreement—and then you’d given him the same: an orgasm, which included swallowing, before his wife came home.
You look at him over your shoulder again. “Don’t ever call me that again. Got it?”
He blinks down at you for a moment, the air in the room shifting as he wonders whether you disliked that specific pet name, or pet names in general. And much more: why? “Sure.” He clears his throat. “It’s four point six seven, by the way. Your decimal is in the wrong place.”
You turn back to your paper, erasing and then correcting. You’d known you had screwed up, but had gotten so frustrated that you’d chosen to eventually move onto the next question.
“I hate math,” you mutter.
He props his other elbow up against the arm of the couch, resting his head against his fist. “It was my favorite subject, actually.”
“Can’t imagine why,” you say, filling in number five, hoping you’ve at least gotten it right. You’re sure Billy will tell you if you haven’t.
“What’s your favorite subject? You like to read, so I assume English?”
You bob your head from side-to-side for a moment. “It’s a tie between that and science.”
Ironic, he thinks. The daughter of a meth manufacturer who loves science.
Speaking of, you’d spent last night on-edge, wondering what the hell had gone through your head to think sharing such a secret with a complete stranger to be a good idea. If any of the men found out…‘being in trouble’ wouldn’t even begin to cover it.
You didn’t want to think what Joe would do to you if he found out you’d ran your mouth off to some random that wasn’t even from here, and clearly not a customer, either.
You weren’t sure that the prospect of him never getting to use you for his own personal sexual satisfaction again would be enough to save you.
Thankfully, however, the only cruiser that had shown up last night—which had still made your heart jump into your throat when you’d glanced out the screen door as your dad went out and you saw it—was Travis’. He’d just been bringing his weekly earnings by to be divvied up.
As your dad stood there counting; ensuring that everything was in-order, he’d stared at you, eyes trailing along your body.
You’d not reacted. You hardly did anymore. They all liked to look. But only a select few were allowed to touch. And he had. Twice now. Even if he was engaged. Not that being spoken-for seemed to matter much to any of them.
Joe had been married now for twenty-five years. Longer than you’d even been alive. But whenever his wife went off to visit her sister, or was to be gone majority of the day and the urge hit him…
Travis was different than him in bed, though.
Then again, they all had their own personal…styles.
Joe really liked blowjobs and demeaning dirty-talk, or taking you from behind—honestly, so long as he was fucking you in some form, he was pleased.
Travis, in the two times you’d now been together, had been more on the gentle side, almost like he was afraid of hurting you—it often made you wonder if that was how his fiancée liked it.
Rhett—in the one time you had been together a year ago—had been tender. You tried not to think about the way he had looked at you that night too much. Or the way he looked at you literally each time he was around you after. With longing, and something else you didn’t want to think about.
He knew what it had been going into it. It wasn’t your problem if he’d hoped for more. You’d been clear from the start.
Sometimes, though, you still felt guilty, knowing that it hurt him each time you slept with one of the other men, or they shared you between them, touching you right in front of him.
And then there was Scott. With him it was just…familiarity. Your bodies simply understanding one another. Wants, needs—they no longer even needed to be talked about. Once your naked skin was pressed against each other—in bed, against the wall, on the bench seat in his pickup, in his garage—it was almost like routine. A pleasant one. Like an old habit that both of you refused to kick. Not that you had any reason to.
Even if, when you fought, it left both of you fuming for days. But the making up was the good part. So, the thought of cutting things off never occurred to either of you. Not that it would last long if you even tried.
You were the only girl he’d bothered to continue carrying on with for so long.
And he was the only man you allowed to kiss you on the mouth.
That was your only rule with the rest of them: they could do, and have you do whatever they desired, but no kissing on the lips. Period.
And then you think of you breaking that rule just yesterday for someone else. But he’d been asleep, so that instance had been different. Or, that’s what you’d told yourself, at least.
You don’t even know why you had done it. Maybe to have a secret of your very own. A new one, that is. Because this house had been that, until he’d showed up.
And now you were back to pretending to be someone else for yet one more man in your life. No more letting your walls down for a few hours and just being a teenage girl with hopes and dreams—playing pretend—even if they dwindled little-by-little as time went on, and you warmed yet one more man’s bed.
He’d ripped that away from you.
You’re broken from your thoughts by Billy speaking again. “I can check your answers once you’re done. If you want.”
“Okay.”
You glance back to him over your shoulder and he meets your gaze with a raised brow. “Need help?”
You study him for a moment, then, “No.”
You turn back around. You’d just been curious as to where his eyes were currently trained at at-present. Because this moment reminds you of a similar one from three years ago, when you’d been fourteen, lying on your stomach on the living room floor, watching TV—you couldn’t even remember what had been on now.
The thing you could recall, however, was Joe sitting on the couch behind you, watching you with hooded lids. When you had turned back to him—feeling suddenly uneasy—you’d watched as he’d adjusted himself over his jeans, making sure you’d seen.
You’d felt sickly after, and hadn’t understood why.
Out of all of them, he’d always been your least-favorite. You had many reasons for that. Perhaps because he was the worst, even if he thought he was the best.
Once you’ve finished, you stand, coming to sit beside Billy, resting back on your calves as you watch him look over your paper.
You study him for a moment, noticing a bit of oil near his brow, and you lick your thumb, then reach toward him to wipe it away.
He pulls back, staring at you. “What’re you doing?”
You don’t reply. You simply clean him up, resting your palm back against your thigh. You wonder if he likes you touching him.
They usually do.
He stares at you for just a moment longer—you can swear that he blushes—before looking back to your paper. “Nine is wrong. Like, way off, kiddo.”
He hands it back to you.
You snort at the nickname, taking it from him. “What is it, then?”
He crosses his arms. “You tell me.”
This again.
You shrug, standing, bending over to put it back in your backpack—you can feel his eyes on your rear. “I can live with one wrong answer.”
He lays his head back against the couch, rolling his eyes. “The correct answer was B, not D.”
You smirk then, pulling the paper back out, quickly correcting it, then putting it away again.
“Never going to learn if I just keep telling you all the right answers.”
You turn back to him then, shrugging. “I’m used to getting what I want.”
He shakes his head lightly.
You sit down again, back pressed against the couch’s other arm, knees bent, feet pressed together in front of you. You break the silence this time.
“So, you went to Hawkins High, too?”
He nods. “Mhm.”
“What were you like? The way you are now?” It seemed to you that most men never grew out of being boys.
He smirks. “No. I was a completely different person.” He rolls his head to the side, looking at you. “Honestly, and this is just going off of a hunch, but I think you would’ve fuckin’ hated me.”
That surprises you. “Really? Why?”
He shrugs, looking up to the ceiling. “I was King Bad-Boy-Asshole. Smoking, drinking, partying, fighting, getting laid and driving a cool car. Generally acting like I didn’t give a shit about anything. Maybe a bit too concerned with my good looks. I had one hell of an ego, too; easily bruised.”
You try to picture this version of him, and for some reason, find it quite difficult to do. You’re not entirely sure that you believe him. But he seems the honest type.
“You’re right. I would’ve.”
And you would. All the guys could get cocky at times. You were used to such behavior. But when it came down to it, especially in regards to business—in whatever capacity—they all pulled their weight; did what was needed—necessary. They looked out for one another.
He smirks again. “You would’ve definitely been my type, though.”
This statement interests you. You lean in toward him. “How so?”
“Attractive, quiet, mysterious. You don’t seem to care much about what other people think. All around hard-to-get. I loved a good chase. As long as I got to break her in like a wild horse in bed at the end of it all.”
He looks at you then.
He’s only half-right about not caring for others’ opinions. Unless they were in your immediate circle, you didn’t. But if they were? You had no choice but to. They expected that from you—you caring about what they do, say, and think. Men like to feel good about themselves, and a supportive young woman is one way to get that validation that they all seem to crave, even if they’d never admit it.
You’d learned long ago to never emasculate them. Any of them. In any form.
“You’re not breaking anything.” You only half mean it. You still think him quite attractive, if nothing else.
It pleases you to hear that he thinks the same of you. Even if you’re not surprised by it.
“Didn’t say I was,” he replies, crossing his arms.
You cock your head to the side. “So, why change?”
“Once my dad kicked me out, real-life hit, and I knew it was time to grow the hell up; the time for games was over. The attitude I had was never going to get me very far.”
There’s a beat of silence, and then he speaks again. “What do you think of me as I am now?”
You shrug. “You’re okay so far. Definitely still a pretty boy, though.”
He scoffs. “Would a pretty boy have hands like these?” He asks, holding his palms up briefly, before settling them against his thighs.
“I was referring to your face, not your hands.”
He chews the inside of his cheek. “Yeah, well, I’m not that.”
Seems like your comment, for whatever reason, has hit a nerve. “Whatever you say, pretty boy.”
He reaches over, grabbing one of your feet, like yesterday, and tugging your sock off, balling it up, and tossing it across the room before massaging the sole.
“Do you have a foot fetish or something?”
His lip twitches in amusement. “No reason why it can’t benefit you.”
You raise a questioning brow.
He shakes his head. “No, I don’t. It’s called being nice. You should try it some time.”
You slide down the couch, settling your other foot in his lap as well. “Oh, I can be very nice. To the right people. Honestly, you probably wouldn’t even recognize me if you saw me with them.”
You stare down at your hands in your lap then.
The latter-most statement had come off as a tad…sad to him. “Why?”
You look at him. “It’s a long story.”
He shrugs, taking your other foot in his rough hands. “No place else to be.”
You glance to the watch on your wrist, knowing Travis is apparently bringing by another cop today to get him dealt-in on the business. He’d asked last night if you’d be there today. You’d said maybe. Meaning that you don’t have to leave.
He looks at your watch as well, then at you. “Do you?”
Your eyes meet his. “Not technically.”
Ever the enigma to him. Never a straight-forward answer with you. You kept him on his toes and guessing, that much was for certain.
“Are you always this cryptic?”
You shrug. “Trust is earned.”
“Trusted me well enough yesterday.”
You glance to him from under your lashes. “I should’ve never told you any of that. It was a mistake. A stupid thing to do.”
His thumbs move to the ball of your foot. “You don’t need to worry. Your secret is safe with me. Besides, I already told you I don’t have any friends. So, who would I have to tell?”
It’s just a general feeling—same as it was yesterday—that he can be trusted. And that’s an unusual occurrence for you. To meet someone like that.
Like him.
He rolls his head to the side, looking at you.
The warmth in his eyes…it’s not often you see such a sight.
“So, who are ‘the right people’, then? Classmates? Boyfriend?”
You cross your arms, shifting uncomfortably. “Family friends.”
He hums, moving his hands back to your other foot. “Why aren’t you with them now?”
“Are you always this nosy?”
He smirks, moving his fingers to your ankle. “Told you yesterday that I only have a few dozen questions to ask. That I find you fascinating.”
“And what do I get for answering?”
His lip twitches. “Helped you with your homework, didn’t I? Sounds like a give-and-take to me.”
“I was doing just fine before you came along.”
He rests the crook of his neck back against the couch. “I think you needed me.”
“Sounds to me like you still have one hell of an ego.”
He chuckles. “Never said I didn’t, honey.”
You glance to your watch again and sigh.
He looks at you, moving his fingers back to your foot, which you then remove from his lap, standing.
You head across the room to retrieve your sock.
He sits up. “Are you leaving?”
You pad back over to your shoes. “Mhm.”
He’s quiet for a moment, thinking. “Want me to give you a ride home?”
You look up to him after slipping them both on. A strange man bringing you home—especially if Scott or Joe were there, or your dad was in a mood—is most certainly a bad idea.
Even at that, with Travis…things were still new and blooming. You knew he felt special—since the rest of them you’d known for years and years—and taking a new guy to bed so soon had made him believe there was something different about him for you. Seeing you with an unfamiliar, like Billy, would only give him doubt.
“No, thanks. I like walking.”
You pull your backpack on and he stands then.
“Will I see you tomorrow?”
You shrug. Normally, you didn’t come here on the weekends to begin with. But you’d procrastinated your math homework yesterday in favor of reading instead. And then had used the unfinished assignment as an excuse to come back today.
You wonder if he always works weekends as well.
He takes a step closer to you, floorboards creaking.
You stare up at him. “Will you be here tomorrow?”
He smiles. “If you want me to be.”
You don’t entirely know what to say to that. “Do you not have work?”
“I don’t work Sundays. And I only work every-other Saturday. It’s the only reason I’m out here today.”
So next weekend you’d have this place all to yourself from the sounds of it. You now had something to look forward to.
You step past him. “And here I thought you came for me.”
He laughs. “Now who has an ego?”
Once the two of you are on the front porch—you really wanted to begin trying to fix this place up, even just a little; perhaps the furniture upstairs could be put to use—you turn back to him. “What I’m doing tomorrow depends on today. Make of that what you will.”
If Travis’ fiancée was to be at work all night, you knew where you’d be this evening. And if you felt wore-out from it come tomorrow, you most likely would hold off on coming back until Monday after school.
Billy raises a brow. “Think I need more details to make anything of it.”
You stand on tiptoes then and press a soft kiss to his cheek, just like yesterday. Once you’re standing on flat feet again, you look up to him with a smile. “Bye.”
He’s blushing again now—you think it sweet that he’s still capable of doing so; the last man who you’d made blush was Rhett, and that was quite some time ago—and you turn, heading through the field to your right without another word.
Billy shakes his head. “What the fuck have I gotten myself into?”
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When you come into the yard, you don’t falter in your steps when you catch sight of Travis and his friend leaned back against Travis’ cruiser—another parked behind it—as they speak to your dad.
You merely glance to them, and the new one—he’s perhaps forty, tall, with dark hair and tanned skin, his strong jawline covered in stubble—looks to you with dark eyes for just a moment. His demeanor is cold, hard, distant. Already he unsettles you.
He breaks the staring contest when he looks back to your dad as you head up the front steps, going inside.
You head to your room, softly shutting the door behind you and slipping off your backpack, setting it on the floor before flopping down face-first on your bed. You smile softly to yourself when you think of Billy’s hands on your feet—such an un-intimate part of the body that he’d made feel the very opposite—and the way he’d blushed when your lips pressed against his warm skin.
You had a crush.
The last time you’d felt such a thing was when you first set eyes upon Scott at eight-years-old. It was now a foreign feeling to you, but nevertheless felt…good. It made you giddy, warm, excited. You bury your face in your pillow and softly squeal, kicking your feet. You should’ve told him yes to tomorrow. You wanted to see him again. You wanted to see him every day.
At what was now your place. You still somewhat wish he’d never found it, but he seemed nice enough so far. Different. And he clearly likes you.
But he liked hard-to-get, had said as much out loud. Most men did.
It was always a careful, delicate balancing act upon a high tightrope you were forced to walk day-in and day-out. Glances and soft touches, giggles and flirtatious comments, precise body-language that could be easily construed one way or the other. But never so distant that it left them frustrated or wholly uncertain of your feelings toward them.
They always needed to believe they were the ones in control. That you might think you know what you’re doing, but in reality, they always have the upper-hand. That they know how to play the game far better than you ever could. Because you’re just a girl. Some pretty, empty-headed doll or sex-toy, while they rule the world. That you need them.
You’re broken from thoughts of golden curls, pretty eyes, and handsome smiles by a knock at your bedroom door.
You groan. Travis. You’re sure it’s him.
You turn onto your side, snuggling the pillow under your head. “Yes?”
When the door opens, you’re proven correct. He leans his tall, broad form against the doorway, crossing his arms. You notice his typically short dirty-blond hair is just a tad shorter today—he’d gotten a haircut. He’s wearing a gray t-shirt, which just says ‘HPD’ on the front, and jeans. At least he’d bothered taking his shoes off first—they all know how you hate them walking through the house with them on.
He gives you a small, soft smile. “Where you been all day?”
You shrug.
He hangs his head, shaking it with a smirk and a small chuckle before looking to you again. “Should come outside and meet Cyrus. I’ve told him a lot about you.”
That translated to: I tell him the things we do when Amy is away at work, and he’s interested in also getting to know you on such a level.
Honestly, you’re a bit surprised he would do so. He’d made a ‘joke’ the last time you two had had sex last week, asking ‘how to get you all to himself’. You’d told him that that’s not how things work around here. If some newbie—a cop in particular—came along and demanded you all to himself suddenly…it would not end well for him.
You sit up then, on the edge of the bed, and just stare up at him.
He glances around your room, then back to you. “She’s out tonight, pulling a double at the hospital. You could come over. I’ll even make you dinner. Spaghetti?”
Having dinner made for you was also different. It was the other way around with the rest of them. But he’s still new at this. Trying to woo you, even if it’s completely unnecessary. You don’t need presents to get you to spread your legs for him.
You doing so easily and willingly is a pivotal part in all of this—your role to play; cross to bear. It was one more thing that kept them all coming back—kept them working with your dad, even if he’s unaware of it. You think sometimes he suspects—he’d nearly caught you and Scott once on your bedroom floor—but he says nothing of it if he does indeed know anything.
If you ever stopped—decided to start telling any of them no—they wouldn’t take kindly to it. They saw you as something they were entitled to, something that belonged to them. And even if they accepted that: you wanting to stop—albeit reluctantly—the business would fall apart.
Having an attractive young woman to fuck whenever, and however they pleased for free with minimal effort put into your so-called ‘relationship’ was something they wouldn’t be getting anywhere else.
You don’t come home covered in bruises or crying, and haven’t gotten…well, as of two weeks ago you could no longer say that. That was the day you’d found the house. You’d never needed it more than in that moment after getting out of Joe’s truck a nervous wreck after leaving the clinic.
But because you always seemed fine, your dad let it go. Sometimes you wish he wouldn’t.
You cock your head to the side. “It’ll be just us?” Will your buddy be there, too? You’re asking.
He smiles again, nodding. “Yeah, baby, just us.”
“Okay.”
He grins. “I can take you home with me when I’m getting ready to leave?”
You stand, readying an overnight bag, incase you need it. “Just let me know when you’re ready to go.”
He comes closer to you, wrapping an arm around your waist, his other hand tugging gently at the hair at the nape of your neck, easing your head back, his lips coming down to settle over your pulse. He kisses, other hand squeezing your rear and he groans. You feel him pressing into your stomach then, hard and firm.
“I will,” he mutters against your skin, sucking on it for just a moment before stepping back. He winks at you before heading back outside.
You simply roll your eyes once he’s out-of-sight.
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ari-just-ari · 2 days
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S1E5, 17th minute roughly, Will and Hannibal in his office
"Jack gave you his word he would protect your headspace, yet he leaves you to your mental devices."
'-' -=- "..You trying to alienate me from Jack Crofford? "
"I'm trying to help you understand this angel man that you seek"
"Oh, huh, help me understand how to catch him. "
This is such an interesting piece of dialogue between them. Of course, every piece is interesting, but this one especially!
Will is smart, you can't really manipulate him without him noticing, not really. Hannibal already saw him react quite quickly and actively to actually working with HIS mind (from S1E1 introduction of the two to the words that come right before: will noticing that Hannibal changed the topic to his mental state, ridiculing him for it but allowing him to proceed). So Hannibal knows Will knows when his mind is messed with in a psychiatric manner.
Will always asknowledges. He calls it out twice just in this scene, first the analysys and then the manipulation.
Now I wonder if it actually works — because the ridicule and the callouts are Will's coping mechanism of sorts, but the problem was now brought to his attention, and could he really keep himself from seeing all of Jack's actions through the question "has he been dismissive of my state" now?
But what I truly think Hannibal is doing here is shifting the focus not necessarily ON Jack, no, that would be too forward for a man-that-speaks-in-implications. He's shifting the focuse elswhere, away from himself, for now.
And truly the next two lines need to be analyzed in a separate post because they're about another thing entirely, but they go together so why not. Or do they?
The next two are.. Subtle and brilliant. Hannibal reveals his true intention here, to make Will empathise with these killers even more, to make him go into their heads deeper and deeper. Maybe to observe Will do it. But overall, it is truly just for Will to understand the new killer. He does not care for the killer to be captured, the motive is the empathy itself. In fact, he may benefit more form the criminal not being caught, since the longer the investigation, the deeper Will goes (see Hobbs's case).
For Will, he would rather catch the killer faster, so he doesn't have to do it at all. The empathy is even less than a tool, it is an UNWANTED tool — he hates when he has to use it, yet it is helpful, so he feels like he kind of has to. Because not using it means he is allowing people to be killed, basically.
So Hannibal tells Will the raw truth. With a bit of omission sprinkled on top, because the context prompts anyone to believe that Hannibal would want the investigation to succeed too. Only the viewer has this context, and can therefore understand Hannibal's true motive. Will doesn't know, so he can't. But he feels it somewhere in his empathetic guts, and therefore his emotional reaction is to call him out on it. He is annoyed with himself for not getting everything first try, always. And he doesn't quite know it, because Hannibal ruffled his feathers right before by psychoanalyzing him, but Will is annoyed Hannibal is not exactly helping him. Not in the way that hi wants.
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savagewildnerness · 2 days
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E12
OK... I normally make notes on an episode when I rewatch, but I dunno... after watching S2E5, I just feel compelled to say a few things...  First... LOL...
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Armand at the end!!! hahahaha!!!
OK, so first off - the acting is SO GOOD:
Jacob - especially the way he delivers his interview 1 take down of Lestat is SO MAGNIFICENT, OH MY! Jacob! You are DIVINE! (Also: Louis' see-through grid shirt: YES PLEASE!!!!)
Luke - is SO ERIC. OMG, he is SO GOOD!
Eric - is SO GOOD! The emotion. I want Ericasavampire and seeing as much of DM is still-to-come - Eric as a vampire - PLEASE!!!!?! Finally someone to love Armand for all he is. Write an entire NOVEL of your own invention writers please for Daniel!!!
Assad - I am at this point bowing down to my Assad shrine! I haven't the words for how perfect your Armand is. I only have love.
There is SO MUCH to analyse from this episode.  We must PSYCHOANALYSE the characters this week fully!!!
I utterly ADORED it!  One thousand thanks to the writers for creating something like this - not in the books, but totally feels like the books. 
And OMG, at this stage I will be devastated if Daniel isn't involved in this entire show from start to end... which also feels somehow some kind of a homage to River Phoenix, who would have played Daniel in the 1994 film had he lived...?
ANYWAY!  OMG ASSAD I LOVE YOU!  OMG WRITERS, I LOVE ARMAND!  Like this episode - how CRUEL Louis is to Armand!  And yet, Armand saves his life!  And not only that, he offers that pathway to Lestat... right until he is unable to utter Lestat's "I love you.."  And really, Armand, you did that in so much love for Louis - you sacrificed your self! Armand, Armand, Armand.
And Armand, seeking in Daniel what it means to be fascinating and special.  The irony is that Armand IS special!!!  He is absolutely the most complex vampire… he just doesn’t understand how to love or be loved… and Louis is NOT his "one"! But he is SO fascinating!  And special.  All of the edits to Radiohead's Creep PLEASE!!!!
I also find it WONDROUS in a show about vampires - where vampires are always a metaphor to The Outsider... yet... in art, The Outsider is often portrayed in imo an unrealistic way, as in "actually the outsider is infinitely special, really!", BUT IN ARMAND, the writers have given us a truly actually special character who feels like many outsiders do - AND is told by the person he loves SO much he would literally be a pathway to their other love that he is boring and not special and not enough... THAT is relatable! (Even though nobody has told me this, as I am simply isolated, personally! Yet, still, I feel it!)
Also - OMG it is both infinitely tragic and simultaneously hilarious that Loumand true sexy times cannot begin until Armand literally WIPES Louis’ mind of Lestat!!!  LOLOLOLOLOL (Poor Armand!)
Also LOL @ Jacob in the post episode thing - saying he can’t think of a bigger betrayal than rewriting the history of a person you love and that it makes him angry… referring to what Armand does to Louis… when IN THIS SAME EPISODE, that’s literally what Louis does to Lestat..!
Meagre thoughts as I didn't write notes during the episode, so just a few points I think of now (and I have had a glass of wine with this episode lolololololol!!  Lalalalala... GOTHIC JOY!!!!!!!!!!)
Lestat is my boy, but ASSAD'S ARMAND.  Armand was always my second favoruite vampire, but Assad - I do not understand how you are making me love Armand even MORE!  Be MORE evil, Armand.  And more tragic.  And more loving.  Be every thing you are.  I know you are fascinating!!!!!
Also, I cried A LOT in this episode! Though I did not note when. Like, that I feel compelled to do a post now with my random tipsy thoughts on a non HQ version with no subtitles I hope expresses A LOT about how I love this episode!?!??!!
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txtmetonight · 3 days
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Revelation ✆
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call summary ⋆ ★ When a date gone wrong...goes right!
pairing *. * Yang Jeongin x Fem! Reader (ft. Hwang Hyunjin)
genre⋆ ★ Fluff
warnings *. Mentions of blood and violence, crude language
call duration⋆ ★ 1.9k
a/n*. * I feel bad for not working on my other works but then again I realize I'm doing this for free out of my own enjoyment so... I hope you enjoy it!! Also, look out for the little surprise at the end ><
taglist ⋆ ★ @kflixnet
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Dating apps suck, everyone knows that.
Jeongin knows that too, but you find it ironic that you both found each other on a matchmaking platform but as best friends. You two had too much in common to continue anything further than friendship.
But as of right now as you stare out of the window of your car (parked in a five-star restaurant for your date) you think of it as a mistake. You know it’s a mistake.
Yet you still proceed with hiding your feelings and push past the negative overtone with dating apps (due to the whimsical horror stories that each app gains) to find your next person.
The new one that would bring feelings of elation. And usually, when you find a decent human being, they do give you sweet joy! But only for a short while until you’re back on the hunt again.
“I can’t believe you found another person that quick,” Jeongin sighs. He sits in the driver’s seat and fiddles with the radio until he finds something that he likes.
You give him a quick queasy grin and settle into your seat. Your date said that he was going to be there at six. The clock currently reads five fifty-seven.
“Well…I like to keep my options open.” He rolls his eyes at your words and places something in your pocket. When you pull it out, you notice that it is your favorite candy, the one that you keep with you on every date to help calm you down. He must've noticed that you were running out.
"I love you what the fuck"
“Yeah yeah, I know, I love you too." You give him a crinkled smile. "But be careful because one of those ‘options’ could actually an axe murderer and the next thing I know is that you’re found in a ditch. Dead. And you’re suddenly on a true crime podcast.”
You snort at his words, heart in your throat when he gives you a cheesy smile and unlocks the door so you can get out. You wish to stay, though.
“You’re being dramatic, Jeongin. Plus, this Hyunjin guy seems nice. What guy with a dog named Kkami sounds like he would kill someone?”
“You would never know.” He shrugs his shoulders and suddenly leans a little forward to wipe away at the corner of your lips and you feel your cheeks tremendously heat up.
You’re lucky that it’s getting dark to see the way that your eyes dart to his lips. When he pulls back, you try not to scamper over to his warmth; missing the touch it left on you.
“But anyways, you know the drill. Call me if he gets weird or if you’re done. I have to go pick something up, so I’ll be in the place,” Jeongin drawls as you get out of the car. He slowly rolls down the windows when you wave at him.
“Sure thing. Don’t miss me.”
He chuckles and pulls out of the parking lot, leaving you alone with a huff of your breath. And then you turn towards the towering restaurant with thoughts of regret.
You’re tired of pretending and you’re tired of going on meaningless dates. And with all honesty, deep down in your heart, you do this to make him potentially jealous. Does it work? You don’t know.
You just want to be with the one you want and get what you crave, differently
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You’re right. And Jeongin is…probably, ninety-five percent wrong. Maybe your date is a killer, and you don’t know yet. But Hyunjin is a nice guy and he’s sweet as honey.
He’s sickeningly handsome too, right up your alley but he doesn’t bring that same spark that Jeongin does, so you feel bad as he pours you another drink. You still let yourself indulge in some of his flirty gestures though; they’re kind of cute–really.
“Do you have any hobbies?” He asks, cutting up his (your) lamb chops. You two are playing a classic game of twenty questions but with a twist. If you two have anything remotely similar, you both switch meals.
It’s quite fun and you’ve taken two bites of Hyunjin’s chicken piccata, not counting the one that you shovel into your mouth as his eyes glint at you.
It churns your stomach when you realize that you only see Jeongin’s twinkle in your mind. You’ve fallen bad. Horribly bad.
“Uhh,” You think, “Art. I do a lot of visual art–all kinds I suppose.”
He seems to light up at your words. “Really! Me too!” He takes a small pause. “Maybe you can show me one day.”
“For sure.” You laugh at his excitement finding it endearing. You then gesture to take back your plate. It goes slowly dwindles down; the eagerness and it becomes a little suffocating as you try to think of a question to ask the man in front of you.
Hyunjin who you see doesn’t really mind, picks up the atmosphere immediately and excuses himself to go to the bathroom. A waiter comes by in the meanwhile and fills up his drink, placing a lemon on the top.
Staring at the fruit, dazed and in thought that’s when you recognize that even though Hyunjin was a great man, maybe you should put the date to a stop and apologize.
You felt bad that it was going to be another failed date and that you were going to go home without your feelings sorted and a semi-broken heart.
Your heart aches in a familiar sense as you pull out your phone to text him to pick you up soon.
[You] heyy can you come pick me up???
[Partner in crime] sure, i’m already here. did he do something weird?
[You] nah, he’s sweet. he’s just not my type ig
[Partner in crime] mmmmm ok. does he look as good as he does in his pfp?
[You] why?? are you jealous?
[Partner in crime] …
[Partner in crime] maybe
You’re about to respond to his cryptic texts, your thumbs ready to get sore but Hyunjin suddenly sits down in his seat, and you’re forced to put down your phone.
He takes another bite of his food, finishing it off with a sip of his drink, which he quickly cringes. He quietly tells you that the lemon was too sour for his taste. Meanwhile, you try to open your mouth to say something, but he quickly beats you to it.
“This isn’t working, is it?”
Your eyes widen and your apologetically twist your lips to the side, nodding nervously. Yet he just smiles at your assent and calls for a check.
“I’m sorry. I just…I currently have someone else that I have in mind. You didn’t do anything.”
He just shakes his head. “It’s fine–really. I kind of knew from the start, it’s sort of obvious.” Hyunjin takes a winding sigh as he pays for your meals (you try to refuse but you find him stupidly stubborn).
“Who ‘s the lucky guy though?” He questions, taking your hand so he can help you up before he places a chaste, friendly kiss on the back. You flush a little at his gesture. God, you wish that you didn’t meet him. You feel terrible.
“My friend.”
“I see. How about this? If I walk you to your car right now, you’ll ask him out on a date.” He boasts and you giggle. You accept his preposition, gaining courage from Jeongin’s texts from earlier and let him open the door for you.
You spot Jeongin’s car in the deserted parking lot and point your finger at the black sedan.
On the walk there, you learn a little more about your date and his horrible pick-up confession advice. It’s so stupid that he stumbles around a little because of both of your laughter.
He pushes you when he trips over a well-seen rock like it was your fault that you placed it there and you giggle. He was probably the date you've had from this app before (excluding Jeongin).
When you get to a respectable distance, you notice that Jeongin isn’t in the car. You suppose that it was so Hyunjin didn’t think you were going home with another man. And even if your date already knew the truth you were grateful that you could have your last words with the man.
Turning around to face him, you smile.
“I’m so sorry Hyunjin.”
His eyebrows furrow and he wobbles a little in his spot, swaying with the wind.
“You…you’ve already apologized. Why are you doing it again?”
You take a step back. “I’m sorry.”
You suppose that you half-heartedly are remorseful because Hyunjin’s an amazing person and you gave him up.
But really aren’t when Jeongin smashes into his face with a wooden bat, splashing blood onto your clothes. Hyunjin falls to the ground, and you grin back at your lover before you both drag the body into the backseat of the car. A bottle of pills in your pocket sears into your skin as you pass the sour drug back to Jeongin.
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You two had too much in common; you both met with each other with the same plans unknowingly. You both shared the art of jubilation and the fascination of the dead. Too alike.
But as you stare at him you realize how much you two aren’t. He likes fried chicken. You like it spicy. Jeongin loves the cold, you like it warm.
Yet what makes your heart thrum more is that he takes care of you so charmingly it makes you sick.
He wipes the bodily fluids off you when they splatter, runs you a hot bath after your escapades, and makes sure you eat when you can’t make yourself to. You love him, you really do.
‘Another dead body discovered found off a highway just now…more reports coming to you soon’
The radio buzzes lowly in the background but you don’t pay attention. You only regard Jeongin. The lingering smell of metal wafts through the vehicle even though you already disposed of the body just moments before in a ditch.
You did it together and now you find the bravery that Hyunjin gave you earlier once again.
“Did you make sure to delete the footage?” You start off saying and he gives you a playful glare as if he was offended.
“Of course I did. I was able to get rid of a whole week of film and I even parked in a blind spot when you got him out. Just to make sure.”
You sigh and pull out your phone. It glints off the blood on your face.
“You’re really fucking amazing.”
“I know.” He speaks. You tap him on the shoulder, and he slows down the car a little to face you. Jeongin grins when you pull up your texts with each other.
“What did you mean when you said that you were jealous?”
“Exactly what you think I meant.”
Clicking your tongue, you softly push him. You try to think of what to say because the words of your confession are in your throat and they burn as you try to express your feelings coolly, but Jeongin all of a sudden stops the car and turns off the headlights.
He grabs your hand and interlocks it with his, fingers pressing into your skin, sending goosebumps up your arm.
“What the hell Yang Jeongi–”
He kisses you. And you immediately reciprocate with your bloody hands on his cheeks, staining his skin with the ruby smears. This only pulls him closer towards you as you pull apart for air, just for him to close the gap again.
This time the kiss is sweeter, and you feel the love coursing between your veins. The rush of energy you look for is right here in your arms.
“I love you,” He whispers. Your lover nuzzles into your hands.
“Yeah? Me too.” You kiss his cheek. “But why so suddenly?”
“I didn’t like you with Hyunjin. I actually don’t like you going on dates anymore–I never have. You might leave me if you find someone better.”
You scoff, “Like I would. Don’t worry, you have all of me, Innie.” He stares at you in silence, and you can see the admiration swirling in his eyes.
“All of you?” He squeezes your arm three times and rubs at your lips, where some of the blood collects.
“Always have.”
He kisses you again.
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saveugoodmadam · 1 day
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lmao this has less than a day to be relevant and sorry for publishing it so late but @dedhumn here is a oneshot based off your desire for the reveal to be with red-eyed hyde!!!
Henry Jekyll was in agony.
His heart hurt in his chest- though whether it came from the waver in Robert's voice or the all-too-familiar smashing in his muscles he didn't know.
“Don't come in, Robert. Please,” he implored as that awful green goop bubbled up through his body and leaked from his face. Hyde was a constant movement, flitting from vial to vial as he babbled, high-pitched, panicked and incessant. In fact, Henry realised somewhat triumphantly, the only words Hyde hadn't yet uttered were ‘this is all your fault’.
He knew it was, though. Hyde passed through the reflection of another vial, its blue glass a reminder of less dire times. A dangerous glint entered his eyes as he reached a trembling, goo-coated hand for its neck.
“You idiot,” Robert Lanyon hissed through the door, pushing down his tears like the good little high society boy he had been trained to be. “Are you really shutting me out again? After everything we've been through?”
He was used to friends ditching him as they grew older. It was a fact of wealthy life he had been forced to become used to. Once they were too rich, or he was too queer or not pale enough for their tastes, he had always been cast aside. But Henry wasn't like them. From the first meeting, he had been kind and gentle and no, it hadn't always been perfect but it had just started getting good again and last night had been so good and suddenly words he'd tried so hard to swallow were spilling from his lips.
“Don't you know how much I-”
Just as soon as they had started to be said, they were cut off by a muffled yelp of pain.
As the transformation came over him, that familiar all-consuming pain, Henry tried his hard to muffle the wracking sobs and piercing shrieks he usually emitted. He and Hyde’s spirits swirled around like water and oil in a stirred beaker; infinitely close but distinctly separate. Their voices groaned as one as their body grew shorter and their hair longer. They were both vaguely aware of the door slamming open and a sharp gasp in a familiar voice, then the whirling feeling settled and Henry was left in charge of a body that was not his own.
Blinking his eyes open again, his eyes settled on the form of Robert Lanyon.
“Fuck. Not you,” he groaned in his best approximation of Hyde's demeanour. His heart thumped anxiously in his chest. The jig was up, after all of those years hiding it all. He could feel the sommeil de la mort swirling through his cardiovascular system and prayed it would set in before too many questions could be asked.
“Henry?” Robert gasped.
Robert could have sworn it was Hyde in front of him. Same hair, same height, same voice, same everything. Everything except the eyes. He had met Hyde before, and one of the man's most striking features were his eyes, those strange, glowing emeralds. Certainly not the deep, soft garnets staring up at him in a way that begged for mercy and affection like a stray puppy. Those eyes were deeply familiar to him, ones he had seen in every colour of light; from the soft glow of the golden hour to the sordid glimmer of a candle.
He knelt beside the smaller man and awkwardly patted him on the back, before some strange force in his chest puppeteered his arms to wrap around him and pull them close together.
“Why didn't you tell me, Henry, you numpty?” he asked softly.
“I- I'm not Henry! I'm Hyde! Henry's boring and… and likes paperwork and I like jumping off stuff!” the man in his arms declared in a poor pantomime of Hyde, his blinking somewhat sluggish.
“Henry, I can tell it's you. I'm not stupid.”
“But I look like Hyde. How could you say I'm Jekyll?”
Robert sighed, moving his head so his lips hovered just above Henry's. He could feel the erratic heartbeat just below his own chest, attributing it to simply nerves and the heat of the moment.
“Do you think I don't know you do well- don't love you so much- that I couldn't pick your eyes out from a sea of faces?” he murmured as their lips locked together. He could have stayed there forever, if Henry hadn't pulled back with a retch and a wheezing groan.
“What is it?” he asked, beginning to panic as he felt the arms wrapped around him grow heavier and watched as it got harder for those gorgeous ruby eyes to stay open. “Henry, please, we've kept secrets for too long. Just, for once, tell me something.”
“Robert, I- I love you. And I'm so so, so sorry,” Henry mumbled, his words slurring as he leaned his head into Robert's chest and shut his eyes.
“Why are you sorry, Henry? Henry, talk to me! Why are you sorry?” Robert begged, his breathing ragged as he pressed a hand against his oldest friend and greatest love’s still chest. There was no heartbeat.
Lanyon opened his lips and let a shriek tear from his throat.
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staylovesmiley · 3 days
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Collision— Chapter 4
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ᯓᡣ𐭩Pairing; Stray Kids x afab!reader
ᯓᡣ𐭩 ᯓᡣ𐭩Summary; You’ve known him for years but you never would have guessed the charming guy you’ve been online gaming with has been an idol this whole time. (masterlist here)
ᯓᡣ𐭩 ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩Warnings; implied afab reader (only they/them pronouns used for reader), mild angst?, pls I haven’t written fanfics since 2018 patience and kindness is appreciated
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By the time you both arrived at the dorms, the rest of 3racha was returning from the studio.
When they saw how red and puffy your face was from your tears, the events of the early morning hours causing exhaustion to settle in your eyes ten fold. “Oh my god Star are you okay?” Jisung asked with wide eyes as he dropped his bag by the couch and made his way over to you, Changbin on his heels. You nodded weakly as the rapper placed his hands on your shoulders while looking you over. “Their apartment flooded.” Chan said as he carried your duffle into his room. “They are gonna crash here until it gets fixed so be on your best behavior.” He said, pointing a finger at the two men causing Changbin to practically howl in protest that he was always on his best behavior. You sniffled, giggling lightly as his outburst. “You can stay as long as you need to….let me know if there is anything I can do to help, yeah?” Jisung gave a warm smile, rubbing your arms gently to comfort you before bidding a goodnight and retiring to his room. You spoke softly as you wished him sweet dreams, Chan returning to guide you into his room. “You can stay in here tonight until we can work out a better arrangement.” Nodding, you looked around before meeting his eyes. “Thank you again for this….I didn’t know who to call-“ the oldest gave a reassuring look before patting the top of your head. “You did the right thing calling me. Now get some sleep, yeah? I’m gonna go crash in Bin’s room.” You were going to protest but found yourself too tired to argue, allowing him to tuck you into his bed before you quickly fell into a heavy slumber weighed down by the exhaustion all of the stress and crying had caused.
Once Felix had woken up, news of your arrival at the dorms had traveled fast as Jisung had told Minho who told Hyunjin who then blabbed to Felix and Jeongin when they had met up for breakfast at a cafe near by. Hurt, confusion, and concern all flashed across the younger aussie’s face at the news that something had happened that caused you to crash in the 3racha dorm so suddenly. Minho hadn’t mentioned to Hyunjin why it was you were staying there and so their imaginations ran wild with the possibilities. Felix felt himself growing a bit jealous the more he thought of how you had gone to Chan when you could have called him. He would have dropped everything and came to help you, you should have known. His two breakfast dates bid him farewell, deciding to do some shopping after their meal leaving the blonde to his own devices has his mind spiraled.
He wasn’t sure why he was feeling this way, it was just Chan and you and himself were only friends. His feelings for you were strictly platonic, weren’t they? He sat at the table alone in the cafe for some time, wondering why you hadn’t reached out to him yet to tell him what had happened. Against his better judgment, he returned home but instead of going to his own dorm he found himself entering the key code to the 3racha abode coming face to face with a shirtless Bangchan sitting at the dining table eating a bowl of cereal. “Sup Lix! I didn’t know you’d be coming-“ The younger huffed, dismissing the older man’s words while looking around for you. “Where are they? Where is Star?” Chan’s brow furrowed in confusion, sighing as he remembered he lived with two of the most gossiping members in their group. “In my room, still sleeping. They really wore themself out last night-“ “WHAT?!” Felix shrieked, eyes wide as suddenly the shirtless appearance of his mate didn’t seem as innocent and common place. “Geez, Lixie not like that…what do you take me for?!” He rolled his eyes, standing to approach the younger cautiously. “Is everything okay?” The blonde shook his head, looking down at the ground as embarrassment from his outburst flooded over him. “No- yes? I don’t know- why didn’t they call me?” Chan nodded, understanding now. “Are you upset they called me instead?” The younger Aussie nodded softly, not able to look him in the eyes. Chan immediately enveloped him in his arms, rubbing soothing circles on his lower back. “Hey, it’s okay. It happens, a little jealousy is normal. We are only human-“ Felix scoffed, rolling his eyes a bit. “I wouldn’t say I’m jealous…I just don’t get why they’d call you when I’ve known them longer-“ Chan pulled back, tilting the others chin up so he would meet his eyes. “Hey, I said it’s okay. I get it- but we need to talk about it, yeah? It’s clearly been bothering you.” Had it been bothering him? All of the teasing and flirting they would do with you to fluster you. He didn’t think it did, until now as he thought harder on it. But then he remembered how you would flush the most adorable shades of pink just at catching his eyes on you, no words necessary, and it didn’t feel as upsetting knowing that he could get such a reaction from you with less effort. Though hearing you had went to someone else in your time of need that wasn’t him, it made him feel like maybe you didn’t trust him to take care of you. He saw the things stay would write about him being soft, delicate, submissive- maybe you thought he couldn’t protect you like Chan could and that hurt him.
Felix sighed and rested his forehead against Chan’s. “Maybe I was a little jealous they called you instead….I don’t know why-“
Chris looked at him incredulously. “Lix, babe…you’re joking, right?” The blonde pulled back to meet his eyes with confusion. “You like Star, sunshine….you are seriously still like this even with everything we all went through?” Felix groaned, burying his face in the crook of the older’s neck “god don’t remind me- I was so stupid and clueless back then.” Chan laughed, shaking his head. “Seems like you still are, Lix. Why don’t you go see if our guest is ready to wake up, yeah? I’m sure seeing you will cheer them up.” It dawned on him that he still had no clue what had happened, and he got the feeling Chan was wanting him to find out from you and not himself. “O-Okay….” He stammered out, worried as to what could have happened. Bangchan pressed a gentle kiss to his temple before pushing him in the direction of his room where you remained soft asleep even after his earlier outburst.
The sight of you curled up in the middle of Chan’s bed, face hidden under your arm as you let out soft little snores caused his chest to clench tightly. He figured the older must be onto something as the butterflies erupted there moments later when he sat carefully on the edge of the mattress and rubbed between your shoulder blades gently until your began to stir, blinking away the sleep as you looked up at him with a pout. “F’lix?” You mumbled, still groggy from your slumber. He chuckled, pushing the hair out of your face as he beamed down at you. “Yeah, I heard Chan brought you here last night….what- um…what happened? Are you okay?” As the events from the early hours returned to you, you felt your lower lip begin to tremble. Before the tears could fall, the blonde was pulling you to his chest, smoothing down your wild bedhead as he whispered as to not startle you. “Hey hey it’s okay….you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to I’m just worried about you..”
Once you had calmed down, you nuzzled your face into his neck causing him to blush a deep crimson and kiss the top of your head. “I woke up and my whole apartment was flooded-“ you spoke softly, hesitantly as you held onto your friend for comfort. Sighed in relief that you weren’t hurt, and that it was something fixable, he relaxed visibly against you. “Chan told me to stay here until it’s fixed but- Lix I can’t impose on you guys like that it’s too much.” You looked up at him, eyes wide and behind them your brain worked overtime to try and come up with a solution. “Yeah you’re right, you shouldn’t stay here.” He said, nodding in agreement. “W-What?” You asked, looking up at him worried as you felt your fears of being a burden to them were being confirmed. “You should stay with me instead. My bed is bigger and I live with the better cook.” He teased, poking your sides until you were squirming around with fits of laughter. “Okay okay OKAY- Lix cut it out I can’t breathe!” You squealed, hitting lightly at his chest to get him to back off. As his attacks died down, along with both of your laughter he could help but stare down at the position he had you in.
There you were, splayed out under him and breathing heavily from the intense tickle fight. He himself was practically sitting on your lap, taking in the way your chest rose and fell rapidly and becoming transfixed by the motion. “Um- Felix? Hello, earth to Felix!” You said, it now being your turn to poke at his side until he snapped out of the trance you had put him in. “S-Sorry, lost in thought. Let’s go get you something to eat, yeah?” And with that he was standing up and pulling you with him so fast you felt the blood rushing to your head much too fast. “Woah slow down, comrade you’re gonna make me faint-“
Your words caused him to freeze, successfully making you run into him where he had been pulled up and behind him. “Oh- sorry just have a lot of energy today I guess….” You giggled, shaking your head at him before reaching up to ruffle his hair. “It’s okay Lix just take it easy, yeah? I lost a lot of fluids last night from crying my eyes out.” You hummed, patting his cheek before making your way to the kitchen where a still shirtless Chan was sat scrolling on his beloved laptop.
You stopped dead in your tracks, taking in the sight with wide eyes. “Oh, morning sleepy head.” He beamed, looking up from his work to great you. “Morning….um- thanks again for everything last night, I really appreciate it.” Seeing Felix coming out of the room to join them, Chan shrugged and sent a wink your way. “Any of us would have, it’s what we do.” You felt arms circle around your middle from behind, giggling at how endearing you found the blonde’s clinginess. “Want to go grab something to eat then check on your apartment to talk to the front desk?” He questioned, looking down at you where you tilted your head back to meet his eyes. “That sounds good, yeah….I think I’d feel a lot better having you there for emotional support.” This caused the freckled man to blush and beam with pride, feeling much better than earlier with those words alone. “Alright then let’s get going! Do you wanna change first or-“ looking down at your pajama clad appearance you bit your lip and nodded, rushing back to Chan’s room to change quickly into whatever it was you had managed to shove in your bag in your distraught state before rejoining the men in the common area of the apartment to head over to your complex with Felix in tow.
“I’m sorry h-how long?” You stared at the maintenance man with complete disbelief, jaw practically to the floor while Felix stood behind you running his warm hands up and down your arms in a comforting motion. His actions helped ground you, holding you in reality as the worker’s words sunk in. “Three months, roughly. There was a lot of water damage no one could have prevented once the leak sprung, along with waiting for the parts to repair the cause of the damage.” You whined, turning around to bury your face in your friends neck, your fists balled up against his chest. “This sucks! What am I gonna do-“ Felix had to fight back the grin threatening to spread across his lips as the idea of you living with him for three whole months. “It’s gonna be okay, you are more than welcome to bunk with me until everything is settled, yeah?” You nodded, sniffling a bit as you trying not to cry yet again as you felt the voice in the back of your mind nagging at you that you were going to become a burden to your friends. “O-Okay…can I go in and get my things I’ll need?” The maintenance manager nodded and stepped aside to allow you into the apartment.
They had already cleared away the pools of water though the floor seemed to squish audibly with each step. Felix helped you pack away your things in the suitcase you had arrived with originally, batting your hands away as you attempted to take it from him when you both went to leave. The only thing he would let you carry was your backpack and even that took you giving him the best set of puppy eyes you could manage causing him to cave and drop the bag from his shoulder and pass it over to you.
Once back at the cuties dorm you set your bags up in the corner of his room while he was out explaining to the others the situation to save you the stress of bringing up the stress again. You were beyond grateful for him, taking a deep and shaky breath before making your way out into the living room where the four men lounged on their phones. You plopped down in the seat beside Felix and curled into his side.
After about an hour of the lot of you scrolling absentmindedly, occasionally showing something to the group or an individual you thought they might like you all heard someone’s stomach growl with hunger. “I think it’s time for lunch- should we order in?” The next few minutes was spent going back and forth over what to eat and where to order it from. Once everything was settled there was a groan of annoyance coming from the oldest in the room as he attempted to place the order. “It says they aren’t doing delivery at this time- someone is going to have to go pick it up because we are not about to go through all of that again to find something different.” You shrugged, speaking up. “I can go get it.” The men ignored you, immediately starting an intense battle of rock, paper, scissors. Felix lost, falling to his knees dramatically as Minho let out a maniacal laugh. “You spend way too much time with Hyunjin-“ Seungmin sighed, shaking his head as he got back on his phone. “Wait- the restaurant is too far to walk so someone is going to have to drive me there!” The Aussie exclaimed, jumping up from where he had crumpled on the floor in defeat. “Okay rock paper scissors for who has to drive Lix to go pick up the food!” You looked at them with confusion, shaking your head. “Wait if one of you has to drive there why does Felix still have to go in and get it?” Jeongin rolled his eyes playfully and a determined look fell upon his face as they began their little rematch. “Cause he already lost, duh. Rules are rules but he can’t drive.” You laughed at that logic, watching as Leeknow lost and he too fell to the ground in defeat with the drama level of a telenovela.
You and the maknaes bid Felix and Minho goodbye as they went to go get you all lunch, settling back in your spots though you were left pouting at the loss of your cuddle buddy. “So you’ve started taking your Korean classes already?” Seungmin spoke up, closing his phone as he set it on the coffee table in front of him. “Um, yeah I did.” You hadn’t had much interactions with the two youngest members outside of hanging out in larger groups so you felt a bit nervous, also setting your phone down to not come off as being rude and not giving them your attention. “Are you liking it so far?” Jeongin asked, scooting closer to you from his side of the couch. “Yeah! Right now it’s a lot of going over the basics I learned a while ago so nothing’s too hard yet but I’m sure it will get a bit more challenging as classes progress.” The two looked at each other before turning back to you. “You already know some Korean?” Seungmin tilted his head to the side curiously, causing you to hold back a giggle as he really lived up to his puppy nickname like this. “Yeah! When I was in highschool one of my close friends lived with her korean grandparents who didn’t speak much english. I was over there a lot, especially during the summers, and so over time I picked up a little bit and even asked Danbi, my friend, to teach me some so that I could communicate better with them out of respect.” Jeongin smiled and nudged your shoulder. “That’s so sweet of you. I’m sure they appreciated it. How come you don’t speak Korean to us at all?” The maknae gave you a pout, resting his chin on your shoulder as he looked up at you. “Well I uh- I’m just worried my pronunciation isn’t very good?” You shrugged, looking away bashfully. “It’s been a long time since I had any practice with it….Danbi and I sort of drifted apart after graduation and so I had no reason to continue to speak it.” Seungmin got up and moved to sit on the other side of you, sandwiching you between Vocalracha successfully. “We can help, you know. Practice with us.” You blushed a soft shade of pink and looked down at your lap. “I-I don’t know what if it’s really bad?” The puppy pouted at you, taking your hand in his causing you to look up at him. “Are you afraid we’ll make fun of you?” He asked, a look of hurt on his face. “No! I mean- I doubt you would it’s just so embarrassing if I get it wrong in front of you…” the two members shared a look over your head before leaning into each side of you. “Getting things wrong is just part of the process of learning, Star…no need to get embarrassed.” Jeongin said, leaning down to meet your gaze.
“We embarrass ourselves all the time have you seen any of the content we put out to the world?” Seungmin spoke with a laugh, softly nudging your shoulder. You turned to look between the two of them as you realized just how close they were sitting. “Okay I’ll go get my workbook then-“ you stood suddenly, the speed in which you moved from where they were both leaning against you causing the two to fall into each other. You giggled an apology before running off to grab what you would need.
“They really are to cute for their own good, Hyung.” Jeongin said with a sigh, shaking his head. “Tell me about it…” the second youngest groaned, burying his face in his hands before the two perked up hearing your footsteps returning. “I got it!” They both flashed you warm smiles before making room once more for you between them.
The rest of the day passed by rather uneventfully, the two youngest members helped you with your work for Korean class until Felix and Minho arrived back with the food. You all went your separate ways after eating, with you and Felix ending up in his room as you sat on his bed on your lap top and him at his desk. The both of you gamed until Leeknow had to come pry you away for dinner. You ended the night tucked safely in the Aussie dancer’s embrace, your back pressed to his chest as you both drifted off to sleep. Skinship came so easily with the two of you, you know for yourself it was due to years of being touch starved. Your family was never very affectionate with you, and you lacked a physical connection with friends since your highschool days leading you to spend most of your time alone or at work. You were comforted in the way both you and Felix both seemed to share touch as a love language, seemingly always being in some form of contact when around each other which did not help the teasing the other members gave him when you weren’t around.
You woke up rather early the next morning, Felix still dead asleep as you slipped out of bed. The air was a bit too chilly for your liking, quickly finding the oversized hoodie Felix had discarded on the floor before slipping it on, you were sure he wouldn’t mind. You made your way out into the kitchen, having been given the tour and explained that you were more than welcome to help yourself to anything that didn’t have a name written on it which was mostly just snacks the others had bought for themselves since most of the groceries were bought collectively as a group to make meals together. You figured a way to say thanks for everything they had done to help you could make them breakfast that morning. You quickly got to work, pulling the hood up and over your head as the dorm was still much too cold and your felt any body heat you held escaping rapidly through any part of exposed skin. Clothed in your baggy sweat pants and Felix’s even baggier hoodie you washed your hands and got started chopping vegetables to mix into omelets, and a simple pancake batter with what ingredients you found in the small kitchen. Mentally you told yourself you were thankful you were staying in the dorm where they are more than just chicken breast as you were sure the pantry and refrigerator were stocked with less variety next door. While you sautéed your veggies, you felt someone approaching from behind and before you could turn to see who it was you heard a voice with a deep rasp from sleep call out a “Morning, jagiya. You’re up early for once-“ before you felt a sharp slap land on your ass causing you to yelp in surprise with eyes as wide as saucers. Upon hearing the much too high pitched response, the perpetrator jumped back as you turned around to face them. “Star oh my god I did not know that was you I am so sorry-“ Minho stood with a horrified expression as he panicked, body tense. You both stood there for what felt like eternity, blinking at each other as neither of you made a move not knowing what to do or say. “You know- seeing it’s you I’m not as shocked but even with all the teasing I don’t think even you’d be as bold to do that with me yet-“ you giggled, attempting to calm him down and show you held no hard feelings as well as to try and dispel the awkward tension that had filled the space. This seemed to work as Minho chuckled, body visibly relaxing as he shook his head and moved to stand beside you. “Can I help you with anything? Whatever you’re making smells delicious.” You shook your head and bump your hip against his. “You can go sit down and relax. I’ve got this, yeah?” The older starred down at you before shrugging and going to the corner where they kept the coffee pot. “I’m gonna make coffee. Want any?” Making a face you shook your head. “No thank you, not a fan of hot drinks.” He raised an eyebrow at you before nodding and pulling his phone out of the pocket of his sweats. “Okay then what do you want? I’ll order delivery from the cafe around the corner. The kids will definitely need some caffeine since we go back to work today and have a lot of dance practice to catch up with.” You thought for a moment before telling him your order while continuing to cook for them. Somehow he managed to get you to agree to letting him help you cook the pancakes (it’s because you burnt one side of the first three you made because the “wait till you see holes then you know that side is done” trick only works for the first side and he took pity on you) and you fell into a relaxed silence before the other three residents of the dorm woke up to the smells of your cooking.
After breakfast you were dragged along to JYPE and sat on one of the black sofas against the back wall, unsure of why exactly they wanted you to tag along and when you had questioned it Minho just made a teasing remark about you being their mascot, with a wink stating you were the one who said you were back when you had first arrived that day they started helping you find a place to live.
You watched, entranced as they danced. Your eyes moved rapidly from one member to the next as they never ceased to amaze you with their talent. When they finally stopped to take a break they all practically collapsed to the floor in exhaustion and you took that as your cue to grab some water bottles and beg passing them out. “Thanks Star, best mascot we’ve ever had.” Minho teased with a cheese grin on his face. You rolled your eyes and pushed on your shoulder lightly, turning to move to the next member when you felt a light slap to your ass from the man much like that morning only more gentle. Everyone’s eyes widened but you only froze for a second before laughing and turning to stick your tongue out at the older who laughed in return. The other members looked amongst each other with differing levels of shock and panic and when you made your way to hand Felix his bottle instead he reached up and pulled you into his lap, clinging to you possessively as he glared at Minho who only laughed harder at the younger’s attempt to look threatening. “Hyung I cannot believe you did that- your butt hunting has gone too far!” Felix exclaimed as he continued to glare while holding you closer and practically wrapping all four limbs around you protectively. “Ya! You’re acting more offended than they are!” He laughed, pointing at the Aussie as he rolled on the floor with his amusement. “I don’t mind, Lix it’s just goofing around you guys do it all the time-“ you said softly, turned to try and meet his eyes. Felix looked between the rest of the members knowingly before clearing his throat a bit. “Star, really I don’t think it was so appropriate….are you sure you’re okay?” You shrugged before looking over at Minho, not catching the looks the others had at you interpreting their constant groping of each other as friendly playful gestures. “I mean I definitively was startled this morning. But that was way harder than-“ “What happened this morning?!” They almost all shrieked at once, all eyes falling on either you or Minho. “I’m my defense I was still half asleep and they were wearing Felix’s hoodie.” He held both hands up, looking at everyone with a smug expression. “You did not.” Chan said, looking at him with disbelief. “Guys seriously it’s fine i think Min is right you guys are more offended than I am about this.” You didn’t seem to get it, and they all sighed as they decided it was probably best to drop it since you seemed to not understand. They all soon got back up to continue practicing, you making your way back to your place on the couch to watch.
Their reactions seemed to weigh on you though, your brain working to understand it all as both Leeknow’s words that morning, his actions, and the other’s reactions, as well as back to that first time you stayed over when Leeknow had whispered to you those intimate details about your dear friend and his tendency to be a bit to noisy in the bedroom, it started to click. Oh- oh? Were you reading into things too deeply or was your previous assumptions not reading into them enough and dismissing their words and actions too easily. You paid attention as the day went on, catching how Chan’s hand lingered on Seungmin’s waist a bit longer than necessary as he moved past him, how Hyunjin draped himself over Han as they took a break to listen to Leeknow explain a move Jeongin was struggling with to him. How at any and every given moment Felix had his hands somewhere on Changbin’s muscular build, whether it be to massage the flesh there or to simply hold onto him, and the looks each of them shared with each other were making you blush from how intimate it all felt. Suddenly, feeling like you should give them all some privacy like these moments were too loving and too personal to be shared with you, you excused yourself to go down the hall to get a drink from the vending machines to allow yourself to process your sudden realization about their true (or seemingly so) relationships with one another.
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author’s note: HAPPY PRIDE MONTH EVERYONE ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა˖⁺‧₊˚ I wanna go ahead and say I am not assuming any of the boys sexual orientations here this is just fiction and how I’m choosing to write them to for the narrative of my own story not having to do with reality at all as far as we know. Idols don’t owe us the knowledge of their identities nor does anyone let’s remember that this pride (and always) and respect each other….that being said I hope you like boys kissing boys cause in this polycule everyone loves everyone sharing is caring ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა
taglist (if the user is pink that means I was unable to tag you); @softkisshyunjin @coastinglove @palindrome969 @amara-mars @whiteghostt @ihrtlix @queen-in-the-shadows @soaplickerrr
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nomsfaultau · 3 days
Text
The Lambs Wolves Wear part 9
Dark SBI AU where Philza’s human children were replaced by monsters. Start of ficlet is here.
For all that “Wilbur” was blatantly hostile and suspicious at times, Philza somehow got the impression that “Technoblade” trusted him the least of the monsters. They were never at ease, rigid like a soldier standing guard. At least more often than not they were farming, which meant Philza worried the least about them hurting Tommy. Still, at meal time he watched them closely as the ghosts fed their chosen vessel.
Tommy held no reservations, sitting by the skeletal husk of his brother and swinging his legs, piling on extra of the potatoes “Technoblade” had harvested. Finally it was easy to get Tommy to eat his vegetables. Really the sole benefit from his stint as a cow, even if Philza had the new hassle of convincing him not to eat grass. And Philza was certain he was the real Tommy, as the “Tommy” sitting next to him was curling his barbed tail around Philza’s ankle. Tommy poked the bony ribs of “Technoblade”, pestering until they bent for him to whisper in their ear. “Technoblade” scarcely reacted as Tommy snickered, but the red lights dancing in their eye sockets darted for Philza, locked upon him like a target. 
“Technoblade” was by far less impulsive than the other two, but that just meant what ever nightmare they inflicted was calculated. Philza could tell they were scheming for all that they rarely imbued Technoblade’s features with expression. But Philza offered the ghosts a cheery grin though he knew it would never be returned.
A cold shiver of a spectral claw tapped on his shoulder, and Philza canted his head. “Do you need something, mate?” “Technoblade” shook his head, and for some reason Tommy looked disappointed. “Well you did wonderful on these potatoes. You’re so hardworking, it’s very kind of you to help me out so much.” Sometimes praise would get Philza a slight smile, since unlike the real Technoblade the imposter didn’t become awkward about it. Yet for some reason “Technoblade” dropped their gaze, sweating slightly. Philza didn’t let his unease trickle into his smile. Usually they swallowed sycophancy well, what changed? 
He hid his confusion with a sip of his tea, only for his tongue to freeze mid-drink. Philza’s eyes flew open, frantically yanking to escape the searing cold only for a frozen block of tea to pull out of his cup. Philza couldn’t help his bewildered laugh, intertwining with Tommy’s cackles. He pried the frozen drink off and winced as ice shattered everywhere. 
The shards of tea flew back together, filling the cup that “Technoblade” caught with spectral hands. It floated back into Philza’s hands, who sat it down to avoid another prank. It was distinctly not in the vein of the stoic “Technoblade’s” humor, or the real Technoblade for that matter given he was far funnier than his counterpart. No, the simplistic practical joke reeked of Tommy, and he turned upon the boy with an eyebrow raised. “Tommy?” 
“Wasn’t me! I don’t have ghost powers!” 
“Sorry, sir,” “Technoblade” mumbled. “It wasn’t particularly noble, but I hadn’t-” Tommy elbowed the spirit vessel roughly and they went quiet, clearly uncomfortable. 
“You said hurting feelings is just as wrong as hurting small squishy human bodies,” “Tommy” announced with a nod as he parroted Philza’s own words. He looked at Philza expectantly for praise, and received a vague head pat. “And you said not to hurt Tommy, and he would be very sad if he wasn’t allowed to be annoying so we HAVE to do everything he says!” 
“Uhh…right,” “Technoblade” agreed dryly. “In our case, Tommy threatened to claim we hurt him and so we were forced to comply or risk being grounded. A fate worse than death.” And given they’d died countless times…hm. 
“Tommy!” Philza scolded. “You shouldn’t manipulate your brothers like that.” Philza hadn’t planned for Tommy somehow becoming the ringleader. That…might make this next part more difficult. 
He blanched. “I’m not Tommy, I’m “Tommy”! I’m innocent!” 
“No you aren’t. Nice try, but you’re grounded, mate.”
“Tommy” cheered. “WHOOO! He’s grounded! That means you’re going to grind him into mush with a mortar and pestle and bury him all over the place, right? TAKE THAT, WORM-FOOD! I’m the preferred Tommy!” He stuck out a forked tongue at Tommy. “He loves me more than you, he loves meee more than youuuuu~”
Philza paused. “I’m sorry, what exactly do you boys think grounding is?” 
“Tommy” scowled. “I know what it is! That’s how it worked in hell.” 
“Wilbur” wouldn’t look at him. “...if it were the Fae Queen, I’d guess it’d mean being trapped in an underground labyrinth for weeks alone. Or treated like the dirt she walks on, but that was always.” 
“That’s not what it means. If you’re grounded Philza despises you for eternity and you can never redeem yourself, cursed to forever roam the land without a chance to move on to the next life. It’s called grounding because he’s anchoring us to the mortal coil,” “Technoblade” posited confidently. “And also extra chores, probably.” 
…that would explain why they all reacted so horrifically. And while it was rather effective at protecting Tommy, he thought in the long run the monsters holding any fear towards him would prevent the underestimation he was relying on. “I…suspect your past experiences are warping your understanding. In this household, grounding means you are housebound for a few days and help with extra chores while we talk about how to act better in the future. I’m not- I’m not going to torture you, good god. I won’t hurt any of you.” He can’t, no matter how much he should want to. He hadn’t seen any of his real children in months; shouldn’t he want them slaughtered? Shouldn’t he hate them? But Philza only hated himself for the weakness. 
“Wait………grounding means we get to spend more time with you?” “Tommy” asked slowly. “And hurting Tommy means we’re grounded…?” 
Philza had just enough time to think oh no before “Tommy” turned into a lion and threw himself at Tommy. Though Philza barely held him back, that just meant a different monster got there first. “Technoblade” nearly punched Tommy in the face, but that turned out to be one of “Wilbur’s” illusions, who was going the emotion route by trying to show Tommy images of his brothers dying in really gruesome ways. Kicking “Tommy” back, Philza lunged across the dinning room table, scooping his boy up as fire began to spread through his house, spectral dead weaving between illusions as the three began to bicker about who got to hurt Tommy first. The dinning room chairs began to float up and hurl themselves violently at “Tommy” and immediately bursting into cinders. “Wilbur” egged them on further in a desperate bid to have his competition annihilate each other given how outclassed he was. 
Panic exploded in Philza’s chest as he realized how badly he’d messed up. He clutched Tommy to his chest, trying to protect him as best he could. Tommy, feeling awfully guilty about having threatened them not knowing their original interpretations of grounding, kept shouting apologies, having apparently not clocked that the brawl was about who got to murder him first.
“ENOUGH!” Philza screamed. “YOU’RE ALL GROUNDED!” A chorus of cheers broke out, the monsters ceasing the violence immediately. “All of you go to your rooms!” A round of protest, but he quashed it. Tommy stuck out his tongue as the monsters dragged their feet, and Philza sighed. “Tommy, you’re also grounded.” The boy protested. “No, you started this mess by manipulating them. You’re going to spend your time thinking about how to apologize.”
“But you already sent “Tommy” to our room!” 
“You’ll be by my side.” Philza stared flatly at their uproarious objections. “Grounding is a punishment tailored to the offense. I want all of you to think about how ripping each other to shreds in a race to see who can attack their brother first is completely unacceptable. At dinner I will bring supper to you and we will privately discuss the matter.” Somehow, it worked despite how clearly they all hated it. 
He waited till they were gone, then dragged Tommy out of the house, brushing objects with his iron ring to rule out illusions and tossing a handful of salt over his shoulder before he began to speak. “Listen to me,” Philza whispered as he cupped Tommy’s face. “What you did was immensely dangerous. You cannot be messing with them like that.” He knew much of it was his fault as well, but it was more important to stress the point to Tommy. 
Tommy’s brow furrowed. “I wouldn’t have bullied them like that if I knew that’s what they thought grounding was. That stuff sounded scary. Who did that to them? Are my new brothers okay?” 
“I-” Philza was blindsided at his concern for them. “I…don’t know. You have to be careful around them.” 
“So I don’t hurt their feelings?” 
“...exactly. When they’re frightened, or mad, they can cause accidents like the one you just saw.” And yet Tommy was enchanted by the show of lethal power, like they were fairy tale heroes. What spiked Philza’s terror only had the boy eager with excitement. He couldn’t see how Philza fought tooth and nail to eke out what little safety they had now. 
And that naïveté would get him killed if Philza didn’t act quickly enough. For a brief second he’d hoped- no. Didn’t matter. They’d all tried to slaughter Tommy just to spend more time with him. They’d proved his children would never be safe if they were around. Philza’s resolve hardened, quashing the part of him trying to protest. He had no other choice. 
Philza had to get rid of the monsters to protect his family.
Next>
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A/N ::: So, I was trying to work something out about Kafka's ass and the sparse amount of hair on it that he's self-conscious about but holy god, I couldn't do it. I started like 4 different things, all of which were not even close to what I was going for. So, here we are. With another idea I had about Florist!Kafka. I had this idea yesterday, I think. Thank goodness I can check this off of my to-do list. There are too many now. It's getting bad, guys. My feelings for this man are becoming an issue lol. Anyway. I about vomited when I finished this because the ending could not have been more perfect (for me?). I love it. I hope you guys like it too!
C/W ::: None. Just more smooshy lovey shit. Sorry not sorry. Maybe I'll carry on with this after the fact. Idk. Let me know if I should whip something up for later? Like after the initial thingy happens?
WC ::: 621 ish
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Florist!Kafka has seen you walk past his little pop-up shop every day for the last 2 weeks and he feels like if he doesn't get to talk to you, he'll burst. He does what he can to get your attention and he'll smile at you. You smile back, politely, sure. But that's becoming not enough. He wants to talk to you. With you.
Florist!Kafka has had enough when he sees you making a run for it from one side of the street to the other when it's raining and he's sitting comfortable and dry under the large umbrella that covers his portable cart. He calls out, jogging toward you with an extra umbrella he has.
Florist!Kafka who trips over his own feet and goes flying through the air, knocking you over, too. You're both laying in the biggest puddle you've ever had the displeasure of encountering. Not only that, but he's lying on top of you, face to face. You can feel his breath fanning across the bridge of your nose.
Florist!Kafka who jumps up faster than he ever has gets right to work on helping you, making sure you're ok and that you didn't hit your head or anything like that. He apologizes profusely, offering you to come sit down at his cart to rest for a moment - to collect yourself, were his exact words.
Florist!Kafka who wanted nothing more than for you to take him up on the offer so he could spend more time with you. More importantly, so he could ease his mind and actually see you get some rest. You're always rushing off to one place or another and he wants to see you just "BE".
Florist!Kafka who is delighted beyond words when you agree to go sit with him for a moment, "to collect yourself," as he put it. You thought it was sweet how he was fussing over you. He wouldn't take no for an answer when he offered you a bottle of water. So, you took it, graciously. Thanking him for his kindness but reiterating that he doesn't have to go through this much trouble for you.
Florist!Kafka who disappears around the other side of his mobile stand for a couple of minutes and comes back with a single yellow rose with a bunch of black tulle floofed up around the stem and an unnecessary apology for you. He blames his uncharacteristically clumsy nature on how pretty you are - this isn't the first time you've made him slip up.
Florist!Kafka who blushes when he sees how happy his observation (and the rose) made you. He wants to ask you out so badly but he's not feeling the bravest right now - despite his ability to fight actual monsters when he's really "working". Love is a beast he has not conquered yet. Though he's reveling in the strength you give him just from being there. He could kill a thousand kaiju after a single kiss from you.
Florist!Kafka who hopes you are ok when he lets you leave him to go off and take a second shot at your day. He watches you all the way until you turn the corner at the end of the block and disappear. He smiles for the next 15 minutes straight because he got to be with you for a short amount of time. But still, he had some lingering thoughts.
Florist!Kafka who worries you won’t find the little note he put in the tulle. 
Florist!Kafka whose lingering thoughts were all shattered when his phone alerted him to a new notification; a text. From you! He opened his phone, scrolling right away to read the message ...
"Meet me where I fell for you. Come hungry. - Y/n"
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@kazutora-kurokawa @southside-otaku
@reiners-milkbiddies @darkstarlight82
@bakubunny @supersecretsaga @katkusuo
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