#i still haven’t properly acknowledged that this happened

[boyga-king]

Forgive me I’m externalizing.

[strxnged]

platonic; 1k; reader is cautious about friendships due to past experience.

“Do you think you’ll ever change your mind about being friends with me?”

Alhaitham’s hand froze, pen paused mid-sentence. Ink dripped once or twice onto the paper, and you watched it intensely so that you would not see his expression.

“I mean, I know you eventually will,” you continued, “but how… soon… do you think that will happen?”

You couldn’t help your gaze from falling on his face. Your fellow scholar was staring sharply across the library table at you, eyes slightly wider than usual.

“Don’t look at me like that,” you said, feeling a bit antsy. “It’s just a question.”

“A baffling one,” he finally said, and then pressed his lips into a line.

“I just want to see where you’re at. It’s been… how long, three years now? So you should have some idea by now, right?”

Alhaitham laid his pen in its case, leaning back into the chair with his arms crossed over his chest. He humphed. “I refuse to answer that question until you properly elaborate on why you’re asking it. We were sitting in what I assumed to be peaceful silence, doing our reading—which, mind you, is completely unrelated to your inquiry as I recall. And now you’re asking me that. To me, it’s coming out of nowhere. So please, explain yourself.”

He was delaying his answer, and it was only making you feel more frantic. Was he going to leave you behind that quickly? Were you catching him on the way out? “I only want to be prepared.”

“Prepared, you say?”

“Y-yes, prepared.”

“For?”

You let go of a long, shaky sigh, acknowledging that he would not relent. “People get tired of me, you know. I’m not exactly the easiest person to be around. It’s usually possible for me to anticipate exactly how long people are going to last, but with you… I haven’t wanted to think about it. So I’ve got to ask you directly. I’ve got to know how long I have so that I don’t take you for—” Your voice cracked, and you cleared your throat before finishing the sentence, “—for granted.” 

Alhaitham pinched between his eyes. He sounded unmistakably bothered. “And how long have you been meaning to ask me?”

You cleared your throat again, averting your eyes to the bookshelves around the table. You could feel tears pricking at your eyes but you did not permit them to fall.

“Awhile, huh?”

You squeezed your eyes shut, praying the tears would go back in. 

He clicked his tongue. You could feel his glare on you even as you admired the cut of the Adhigama wood. One book was hanging out of the shelf. You stood up suddenly and walked over to fix it so that Alhaitham would not see your jaw trembling. You had meant for this to be a logical, calm conversation. Damn, you thought, shoving the book back into place. Pull yourself together.

You felt the shadow of Alhaitham leaning his elbow on a shelf to look at you. “You asked me a question and then walked away. Do you want to hear my answer, or not?”

With a shrug, you focused on the feeling of the book's spine under your lingering fingertips. It was a cloth hardcover. Some of the tiny weaving was worn out.

“Alright. I’ll start with all of the things you got wrong. First of all, it is not fair to neither me nor you for such a question to be asked. We cannot know the future and there is no use in living outside of the reality of the present. You may not prepare.”

You stayed silent, pulling the book out and pushing it back in again over and over again. With your other hand, you wiped away one disobedient teardrop.

“Secondly, I wonder if you were paying attention to the words you were saying. You said you’re not the easiest person for ‘people’ to be around.” Neither was he, you thought. “Well, neither am I,” he said, echoing your thought.

“Okay,” you said, “but still.”

He scoffed. “‘But still’? That’s your best argument against my point?”

You laughed, although it sounded a bit more like a sob. He was correct, there. “You still haven’t answered my question, Alhaitham.”

“I see no need.”

You looked up at him, eyes wide and red.

He considered this. “Fine, I see a need. But you're picturing I’ll tell you something I haven’t once implied, I hope. I am not going to change my mind about being friends with someone who means as much to me as you do. That’s not how friendship works, and I am rather distressed that you are under such an impression.”

“Alh—”

“Let me be clear. I am not changing my mind on you. I’m going to stay your friend as long, if not longer, than you will allow it.”

You rubbed both your eyes with the heels of your hands. “Well, that’s real nice of you.”

You did not believe him, and you could tell that he knew this. “Besides,” he conceded, “who else is going to sit with me in the library for eight hours just because they like being around me? People don’t do that.”

“I’m not people,” you said.

“No,” he agreed. “You’re not. And neither am I.”

ps. dear that one irl who might end up reading this (the one who has literally asked me this question) (you really are a devoted gal if you're here right now, people don't just read other people's fanfiction for a fandom they know nothing about) (unless you're howdy) (but you're not), alhaitham's response is my response to you.

i relate to him for reasons i hope are clear.

➳ GENSHIN MASTERLIST

[scary-lasagna]

HEYY! Wondering if you do everymanhybrid and if so could you write a HABIT x reader headcannons? Relationship in general I don’t have specifics in mind

I might have mentioned him in passing before, but I'll definitely write something about him for his place in my AU, it's a bit ooc from EMH but it's very interesting.

HABIT

Habit is...not mentally stable in the slightest.

The only time he would fall in love is if it either a.) benefited him or b.) you were smokin' hot and he obsesses over you

And be prepared to hear him mull and complain over both Slender and Zalgo, both who equally piss him off but he's forced to be nice to one of the two.

But when Habit falls, he will fall hard. You will sit on a royal pedestal, and HABIT your knight in shining armor. There would be nothing he is against doing for you.

He grovels at your feet, swearing to always protect you, to keep you fed, to keep you safe and warm, to-

“I KNOW you only asked for Kirspy Kreme, but darling my point still stands.” And he pulls his unsettling, ear-to-ear grin out of his back pocket to plaster on his face.

But all-in-all he’s your little guard dog.

Most of his working hours are spent obsessing over Slender’s history and origins, striving to find any bit of information that will lead to his downfall.

The rest of his work day is spent over tea with Zalgo, not that he ever drinks any, he’s really just there for the lemon squares and latest celebrity news that haven’t hit the 6 o clock channels yet.

After all, Zalgo has close ties to all of the higher ups. He always has the best gossip.

He might shove some pastries in his pockets for you if anything looks of your taste, but they’re usually melted or crumbled by the time he gets home. Usually he licks the remains out of his pocket (gross).

There’s also a room in your shared space that you are never allowed to go in, two if you’re counting the closet.

A room filled to the brim with ancient texts, books, artifacts, and knives hold a red herring for a closet in that same room filled with many different types of guns, weapons, cursed artifacts, and a haunted McDonalds coupon from 2008.

HABIT and Evan function similarly to Liu and Sully, however HABIT has the upper hand in the body. It’s a once in a blue moon occurrence that Evan will peek through and attempt to escape the house and/or try to kill you, thinking you kidnapped him.

Freaked the hell out of you the first time it happened before HABIT managed to grab hold of the reigns.

Safe to say, Evan was properly dealt with that night in the dimension of HABITs brain, being held in a void of endless whispering and torment while you sat with HABIT, watching Twilight just to make fun of it.

He’s also kind of…not the brightest. He always has the right idea, but never quite sure how to execute it properly. This is the explanation of the many failed assassination attempts toward Slender and his brothers.

He has been sucker punched more times than he can count by 3/4 of them. Splendor just talks him down with a therapy session and it works in more ways than one.

But this also applies to relationships. You want roses? He gets you daisies because they look better, even though you specified roses.

A fancy restaurant date? Takes you on a cruise. You didn’t want or pack for a cruise. Neither did he. Don’t ask where he got the money.

Right idea, wrong execution.

He’s also extremely clingy, even though it’s been implied, but he will quite literally hover around you, waiting to be acknowledged or asked to do something for you, because if he’s not working, he doesn’t have anything else worth tending to except for you.

You’ve once asked for alone time and he quite literally sat in the floor of the kitchen and twiddled his toes until you got peckish for a snack and stumbled on him.

“Why are you on the floor?”

“I was waiting for you to ask me to get you a cookie.”

[mrsshabana]

Aaah there are so many I want to see but for now could you show Mafia!Demon!Gyutaro?

I'm so glad you picked this one because it is one of my favorites too! This fic takes place in the AAO au. But if Gyutaro didn't go to college and joined the mafia with the other moons instead.

If you aren't familiar with my Against All Odds au, basically demons live among humans similarly to Tokyo Ghoul. But they don't have to eat humans, they can survive by eating any raw meat. Though some of them will still eat humans anyways.

Content: 18+ MDNI, Gyutaro x female!reader, violence, kidnapping, sexual themes

✧:･ﾟ→ My WIP's

𝑴𝒂𝒇𝒊𝒂!𝑫𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒏!𝑮𝒚𝒖𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒐 𝒙 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

The world of demons was foreign to you, but in the blink of an eye you were thrusted into this life and demons became all you knew.

The only other humans you ever interacted with were the other girls. Girls who were in the same unfortunate position as you.

You were no one special before. Just working your way through life like the rest of us. And that’s how he found you. You were the perfect candidate really. Young, attractive, and weak. He was sure you’d be profitable. Abducting you in the cover of nightfall as you walked home from work after a graveyard shift.

Your abductor, the demon with the two-toned hair, took you to the black market. Selling you to an illegal exotic dancing club. A place where humans are kept captive for the enjoyment of demons. Forced to wear lingerie and dance behind nichirin bars.

This became your new normal.

You hated everyone here. The other girls gave you a hard time because you were new, and the owner of the club didn’t help. She’s the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen, with stark white hair, two-toned just like the demon that had abducted you.

For some reason, that demon often came into your thoughts. As you sit in the back room, preparing yourself for your upcoming scheduled dance, you think back to him. His appearance was terrifying, but something about him intrigued you. You’ve been an exotic dancer for only a week, and you haven’t seen him since that first day. 

Too distracted by your lingering thoughts, you barely notice the other girls shuffling out of the room. You’ve been surviving by following what the other girls do, the girls that have been here for years. And an uncanny feeling begins to form in your gut. One that tells you that you should follow them. So you hastily finish your hair and makeup, slide on your heels, and make your way towards the door. 

And that is when you bump into him.

In your panicked state, you open the door too quickly without realizing what’s on the other side. Walking into the man’s chest, with a huff you slip on your heels. Falling right on your ass, at the feet of the only demon you recognize in this place.

Glowing eyes stare down at you with a frown. His lips downturned in an annoyed scowl. Looking down at you as if you are his prey, his frown changes into a toothy smirk, showing off his sharp teeth. 

Every nerve under your skin burns, every muscle in your body aches with the desire to run. But you find yourself frozen at his feet. Staring up at him like a helpless puppy.

“I-it’s you…” you whimper as he quirks a brow at your acknowledgment. Crouching in front of you and reaching forward to grip your cheeks with the rough pads of his fingertips. He hums as his grin widens, turning your face side to side, inspecting you.

“Oh so you remember me? How sweet,” he coos.

Quickly getting bored, he rolls his eyes and stands, “Get up,” he orders.

“R-right,” you stutter, struggling to get back on your feet. Once you are able to stand properly you bow and apologize, “I’m so sorry for my clumsiness, please forgive me sir. I-it won’t happen next time.”

He takes a step forward and brings his hand below your chin, forcing you to look up at him. He’s pleased by how you speak to him, it’s so different from how the other girls react to him.

“So eager to please, I’m glad I found you,” he chuckles before releasing you from his grasp, “and no need to be so formal, just call me Gyutaro from now on.”

You nod and he pushes you aside, “Now scram.”

After that day, you learned who Gyutaro was and why he frequented this place. This club is owned by the Kizuki, otherwise known as the most dangerous demon mafia in the world. And Gyutaro is one of their top members, along with his sister, Daki, who so happens to be the manager here.

Gyutaro comes once a week to collect the money that the dancers have generated, and once a month he’ll bring new girls if there is a need for more dancers.

Every time you’d see him, you’d politely greet him. A part of you hates him for bringing you here, but you begin looking forward to his weekly visits, even though he rarely acknowledges you.

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

You’ve been here for a few months now. Things have gotten alarmingly mundane. Your previous life becomes a distant memory as you’ve even forgotten what the warmth of the sun feels like on your skin…

Putting on your lingerie, slipping into a pair of stockings and heels before you exit your quarters. 

Daki waits for you in the backroom with a group of other girls. Something must be going on. Daki never bothers to interact with the dancers much unless she’s scolding them.

“Girls, listen up,” Daki yells in an aggravated tone, “we have some special guests tonight so be on your best behavior!”

She then begins pointing to girls out of the group, instructing them to come to her, “and… you,” she points to you, “the rest of you are off for the night.”

She picked a dozen of you from the group, “Ok girls, you’ll be having some very special customers tonight,” she smirks, “Come with me.”

You all follow her out onto the dancing stage, where nichirin bars separate you from a group of men sitting in front of the stage.

She instructs you to stand in a line. And your heart sinks at what she does next.

Pressing a button behind the stage, the bars begin to lower until there is nothing separating you from the men that sit in front of you.

And what do you know… there he is. Gyutaro sits nonchalantly with his legs spread wide, a lazy smirk on his face. He’s wearing his usual attire, ripped black jeans, black leather boots, and a black button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His birthmarks and various tattoos are visible on his exposed skin. 

The other men you don’t recognize.

Daki turns on the music and shouts, “If you're chosen, give him a lap dance. If not chosen, you're free to go back to your quarters for the night.” 

What the fuck is happening right now. As far as you know, this doesn’t happen. They never allow girls to get in such close proximity to customers for safety reasons. Having half naked women flaunted in front of blood thirsty demons is a recipe for disaster, which is why the nichirin bars have always stayed between the stage and the customers. The only time a girl is allowed to give personal dances is if the guests pay a hefty price… and even then the dancer usually never comes back.

They begin going down the line, each man pointing to a woman of his choice. And for some reason, you’re relieved when Gyutaro points to you. Feeling a heavy weight lifted from your shoulders. 

This doesn’t go unnoticed. Gyutaro’s smirk is wiped off his face when you flash him the tiniest smile as you make your way to him. You shouldn’t be happy about this. He knows you know who he is and his status within the mafia, so why are you so eager to see him?

After each man has made his selection, Daki takes the remaining girls backstage. Leaving you vulnerable at the hands of the Kizuki…

Dim lights flicker as you stand between his legs. Gyutaro’s gaze trails down your body, pupils hesitating when he reaches your breasts, and stopping when his gaze reaches your thighs.

This is quite awkward for you. Yeah, you’re used to dancing for guests but Gyutaro has never been one of your guests. He’s always just been the guy that comes to collect the money, you never viewed him as a customer. But orders are orders and in this place you know you have no choice. So you begin to dance for him.

“Stop,” Gyutaro says sternly, grabbing your wrist and pulling you forward, “Sit…”

You nod and do as you're told, taking a seat on his lap, straddling him. He rests his left hand on your thigh, and brings his other hand up to your face. Moving a strand of your hair behind your ear.

“Why so eager to see me?” words drawn out, his hooded lids stare at you with a lazy expression.

“I-I was just glad that you picked me…” you blush, feeling your body heat up.

He hums, holding your hips down as he rolls his hips upwards. A hard bulge can be felt through his jeans, rubbing directly on the wet spot shamefully forming in your panties.

“I can’t imagine why,” he growls.

You lean forward to hold onto his shoulders for support, “You-you’re the only one I recognized…”

Gyutaro can see right through you as you spit out a half truth. Trying to convince yourself that that is the only reason that you were happy to see him. That you haven’t formed some sick attraction towards him. 

“Well, I was happy to see you too,” he smirks, caressing your cheek, “so pretty, so obedient, so eager to please… so sweet to me every time I come by each week.”

His praises make the tightness in your chest worsen, you feel like you can’t breathe. Your whole body feels hot as he leans forward to kiss your neck. Nipping at your collarbone with his teeth. Your small acts of kindness and simple decency towards him have caused him to grow a liking to you. Forming foreign feelings towards something that he only viewed as food before.

Tilting your head to the side to give him better access to your neck, you look beside you. The sight makes your blood run cold.

The man beside you, a demon with platinum blonde hair and rainbow eyes, is busy ripping out the trachea of one of the dancers. Blood covers his mouth, pooling beneath him on the floor. Looking further down the line you see similar acts. 

You seem to be the only girl left alive.

Gyutaro instantly senses your panic. Feeling your pulse increase drastically under his lips as he kisses your neck. You begin to squirm in his grasp, but he keeps you seated with a firm grip. Your breathing becomes choppy and panicked, whining as tears blur your vision.

“Hey hey hey, you’re ok,” he coos and wraps his arms around your waist to pull you close, “I’m here with you, doll.” 

“P-please…” you whimper pathetically.

“Don’t you want to be a good girl for me?” Gyutaro grabs your face, forcing you to look at him, “You trust me don’t you?”

Through hiccups and sobs you respond weakly with a nod, “Y-yes.”

“Good girl,” he groans, “It’s just me and you right now… don’t worry about anything else.”

[queenie-official]

Chapter Four: ‘The Groom To Be’ Bridgerton Au!Anakin

part 1, 2, 3

a/n: hey guys 🤭 so as per usual the pictures used all correlate to the story so do keep that in mind while reading🥰 Also Thank you so much for 200+ followers i love you all 💋💋 Hope you enjoy this chapter loves🫶🏼

To your delight or rather relief you’ve been told that Anakin would be joining you in the castle a day before the wedding along with his mother and brother. the royal council deemed it necessary so that they could ensure everything went smoothly and the possibility of the groom not arriving on time would be one less worry. unfortunately you had received this news from Barclay right before you were about to head to sleep. so now you find yourself on your balcony staring off into the night sky unable to sleep. thoughts of what’s to come plaguing your mind, fighting the urge to pace around- a typical nervous habit of yours- when a soft voice came from behind you. “your majesty you should sleep”

“i would if i could Eleanora but my thoughts betray me” you say with a sigh, not bothering to turn around. instead you kept your gaze on the moon as the cool night breeze blew over your face. “shall i make you some tea to help calm you?” she suggested as you leaned against the railing, resting your head in your palm. “tea would be nice but i am quite alright” you answer airily.

“very well” she replies but does not leave, instead standing still in the doorway behind you. finally you turn to acknowledge her properly “shouldn’t you be sleeping?” you ask curiously, seeing her with night garments of her own on. “i find it hard to sleep when you cannot your majesty. i worry for you” she says with knitted brows, concern written all over her. you felt bad for causing her worry. “i promise i am fine. i just cannot seem to rest knowing that he will be here again in the morning, this time i properly have a chance to speak with him and yet i haven’t a clue what i should say.” you vent, walking into your room and allowing Eleanora to close the doors to the balcony behind you as you sit on your bed to speak with her. “a simple greeting is always a good start, considering you didn’t last time.”

“that’s because i hadn’t been given the chance” you said a bit defeatedly. “you could try now” simple and true but for some reason it didn’t seem so easy to you. “i find it strange how much i want to talk to him, maybe im just curious as to what his voice sounds like” you wonder out loud, fiddling with the lace curtains attached to your bed frame. “it sounds perfectly reasonable to me, you want to get to know him he is going to be your husband after all.” you sigh whilst letting yourself fall back onto your bed, laying with your legs hanging over the edge. “i can only hope he wishes to get to know me too, but if his silence is anything to answer i fear he may not.”

“perhaps he’s just shy” she suggests and the idea makes your nose wrinkle. you hadn’t known many princes to be shy, most of them had egos too high for that to be a possibility. “i suppose that is a perfectly reasonable explanation, but what good is a shy king?”

“won’t that be easier for you then your majesty?” you turn your head too look over to her, she’d sat down at the ottoman in front of your bed so that she could be closer while you voiced your thoughts to her. “how so?” you ask with a raised brow, unsure how him being shy could possibly be a good thing.

“well there won’t be much of a power struggle between the two of you” she says and the statement made you laugh. she wasn’t wrong and you weren’t laughing at what she said specifically, but you where laughing at the mere idea of a power struggle happening. “there would not be a power struggle regardless, i get enough of being told what to do by the men in the royal council. i shall not allow that in my marriage” you state firmly once your laughter dies down, a small smile on your face as you spoke.

“of course your majesty” she says in response, a similar smile mirrored onto her face. “i think i will have that cup of tea Eleanora” you say softly, sitting up and moving to sit against your pillows.“yes your majesty” she responded, happy to be of help and to see you in a lighter mood.

the sun was shining brightly in the sky as you waited rather impatiently for the carriage to arrive. the only thing stopping you from pacing in a circle was Padme on your left and Eleanora on your right, so instead you walked up and down the length of the castle hallways. they where supposed to arrive already, late by over an hour now. the idea they might not show at all has crossed over your mind multiple times now but both girls beside you where quick to shut that down each time you brought it up. of course they where right but if that is the case then what possibly could cause such a long delay.

“y/n we really need to work on some different coping skills” padme said sounding quite winded as she did. the poor girls where practically jogging to keep up with your fast pace. "yes or at the very least you ought to get a slower walking speed" Eleanora added quickly, struggling to catch her breath as well. "sorry" you say and pause your actions allowing the two girls to catch up to you. “i don’t know why i’m so worried, it would be perfectly understandable for them to arrive late. it’s not like our kingdoms are close.” you didn’t realize how quickly you rushed those sentences out of your mouth until you saw the look on Eleanora’s face. thankfully Padme seemed to understand what you said, probably used to deciphering sentences from her own children. “exactly so let’s take a deep breath and calm down, if anything this is exactly why they are coming a day early. no need to work up a sweat over this” She says softly, a gentle hand resting on your shoulder to help ground you.

“Ah your majesty there you are, the carriage has arrived” a breath of relief exited you at Barclay’s proclamation. “thank you for letting me know i’ll be down in just a moment” Barclay nods at your response and heads back down the hall probably to go greet your guests and properly invite them in. you turn back to the girls and Padme gives you a soft smile. “i’m guessing that’s my cue to leave” she says with a laugh and you give her a hug silently thanking her for always being here for you. as you pull away she gives you one more look that says you’ve got this before she leaves through the gardens again. “i’ll busy myself in the library your majesty” Eleanora adds so that you don’t have to worry about her, she gives you a smile of her own as well before heading off.

Taking a deep breath you turn to look into one of the mirror panes in the hallway, making sure you hadn’t messed up your hair. flattening your hands along your dress to smooth out wrinkles as well as rid the sweat from your palms. today you where going to make it your mission to talk to Anakin- even if he was reluctant to speak with you or even look at you. turning on your heel you walk down the hallway at a reasonable pace as you mentally prepare yourself for however the next couple interactions go.

as soon as you entered the room they where waiting for you in, you immediately greeted them with warm smiles. only something was different this time. instead of the side of a tan face you where met with the last time you where in a room with Anakin you where instead met with the beautiful pair of blue eyes you had only caught a glimpse of, the sight made your stomach swirl.

forcing yourself to tear away from his eyes as you walked up to them, you look at who you presumed was his mother. “your majesty a pleasure to meet you” you gave the queen a low bow, in terms of status she outranked you. so it only seemed right to bow properly before her.

“a pleasure to meet you as well your highness” she says with a soft smile giving you a quick bow as well. “you’ve already met my sons” she says with a gesture towards them and you nod before greeting them. “yes it’s good to see you both again” both boys give you a nod in turn but only Obi-Wan speaks “thank you for having us” you smile politely but you can’t help but wonder why Anakin still refused to speak. at least he was looking at you this time, that’s progress.

“it is still early and im sure you all are hungry, i’ll have Barclay here lead you all to the dining room” both the queen and Obi-Wan seemed pleased with that suggestion and happily nodded, the only person who didn’t give you any indication of what they where thinking was once again Anakin. it was beginning to frustrate you, why wouldn’t he speak to you. Mad or not you’d rather him talk to you and tell you off then stay in silence.

“feel free to make yourselves at home” is what you said instead of voicing your thoughts, making sure to keep up the happy facade until they all left with Barclay. you did not let this falter you though, growing more determined to get him to talk or at the very least to find out why he wouldn’t speak to begin with. maybe he had an impediment, you wouldn’t judge him for it- in fact when you where younger you had quite the difficulty saying words with the letter R and sometimes you swore it came back whenever you where extremely nervous.

pushing your thoughts aside you decided to busy yourself with some work, so off to your study you went.

it had been a few hours since you’d last seen them all and you’d finished most of the work you needed to do for the day, according to Barclay Obi-Wan went to the library to read and the queen went to the room she’d be staying in for some much needed rest after the long carriage ride. as for Anakin well he wasn’t quite sure where he’d run off too, so you had taken it upon yourself to find him. this was the perfect moment to get him to talk.

the only problem was where ever he had disappeared to had made him next to impossible to find. you’d spent the last 15 minutes searching for him before you almost gave up.

sighing as you looked outside a window is when you saw him- or at least what you could only assume was him. quickly picking up your skirt so you didn’t trip, you sped through the castle to get to the side exit closest to where you had seen him.

sure enough there he was, sitting upon a half wall and resting against a pillar with his eyes closed peacefully. you slowed your pace as you approached him, trying to seem as casual as possible. “you seem comfortable.” you watch as he peaks an eye open to look at you before he answers. “i believe you said we could make ourselves at home.” he closed his eyes again right after he finished speaking. you couldn’t help but smile brightly once you realized he actually spoke though. “ah so he speaks” you say jokingly but it definitely came off more as a revelation.

“of course i do” he said now opening both of his eyes to look and address you properly, clearly realizing you weren’t going to leave him be anytime soon. “well i’ve yet to hear you say a thing up until now” you defend yourself, feeling like what you’d said was justified. “did you need to hear me speak?” he asks and that question confuses you. of course you didn’t need to hear him speak, but why would you not want to.

“i suppose not… is there a reason you didn’t” you ask curiously. “yes” he responds, and you nod waiting for him to continue but he doesn’t. you shift slightly in your spot as the silence continues before realizing you’d have to press further if you wanted a answer out of him. “will you tell me the reason?”

“if you wish to know” you resist the urge to roll your eyes at that response, so this is how it was going to be. “if i didn’t, i wouldn’t have said anything at all” you point out the obvious. “it was a choice i made to annoy my brother” he stated simply. the bluntness of it throwing you off for a moment. “what?” he smiles slightly at the question and your reaction, was he just teasing you? “on the first carriage ride here i was given a firm lecture on how i was to say and do nothing so that everything would go smoothly.” he says and although you got a proper answer this time you couldn’t help but raise a brow in concern. “should i worry why you speaking would cause things to not go smoothly?”

“not at all” he said with another smile, he was definitely pulling your leg. “not very reassuring” he simply shrugs at your statement. “so the reason you did not speak to me was out of spite for your brother?” you ask again to reconfirm his answer. “that is what i said yes” he crossed his arms as he spoke, leaning back against the pillar again as he waited for your response. you roll your eyes and think over that fact. okay so he was a petty person, that could go either way considering you’re also quite petty.

“but why didn’t you look at me” you ask curiously, being petty and refusing to speak was one thing but not even acknowledging your existence was another. “i’ve been told my stare can be quite intense” that certainly wasn’t the answer you had expected. “i don’t understand you.” he gives you another shrug.

“you’re really casual about all of this” you opt for a change of conversation. “what do you mean?” he says whilst he shifts so that he’s sitting with his legs hanging over the wall and his body facing you. “i mean about this whole marriage situation, you don’t seem mad or even scared”

“should i be?” he asks with a tilt of his head. “you aren’t scared to marry me?” you ask incredulously. “i’m getting the feeling you want me to be”

“i’m a stranger” you point out to him, how could he not be scared of marrying a complete stranger. “are you scared of marrying me?” you blink a few times not having expected him to throw the question back at you.

“how could i not be, i don’t know you” he seems to ponder over your answer for a brief moment. “so we’re both strangers that means we have common ground” he answers with another shrug. what was going on? had you been overthinking this situation entirely, or maybe he just wasn’t as easily distraught about his entire life being changed practically overnight- neither of these seemed like the correct conclusion.

“i’m confused” he raised a brow at that. “i feel im being very straightforward” you scoff once again resisting the urge to roll your eyes at his statement “this conversation is going nowhere”

“where would you like it do go?” he asks you and you aren’t quite sure what to say to that so you shift the conversation again. “i prefer someone to speak their mind to me.” he’s nods in acknowledgment but remains silent again looking off to the side like he was thinking something over.

you look him over again in this moment of silence taking note of the clothes he was wearing- they where a little over casual for a prince especially compared to what his mother and brother had been wearing, he could of been easily mistaken as a stablehand. “you know to be a king you are to dress the part” you say boldly and watch as he looks back over to you. “i prefer comfort over luxury” he retorts. “most people would consider luxury comfort” he laughs at your response and it made your face flush slightly, unsure why he was laughing until he calmed down and spoke again. “let me ask you then, is that corset you’re wearing comfortable?” alright fair point on his end but it’s not like he had to wear a corset.

“if the people saw you they’d think i’m marrying someone of poverty. it would be a scandal” he rolled his eyes at that- you weren’t being completely serious mostly just wanting to see if you could get a reaction out of him the same way he had been doing to you, having to resist the urge to smile when it worked.

“everything leads to scandals.” you snort a laugh and you could of sworn you saw a smile form on his lips again when you did. he wasn't wrong though just about everything did lead to a scandal. “you cannot be seen in public dressed like that.” you add still wanting to tease him.

“good thing the public is not here then” you smile, he was funny. “fair enough” was all you could think to say and he chuckled “that’s all you got then?”

“for now anyways, yes” you look back over to the castle deciding you should probably speak with the other two guests as well. “i’ll let you get back to what you where doing before i got here” he nods in response and you begin to walk away only to stop a few moments later by the sound of his boots hitting the ground and jogging over to you “wait i have something for you.” you turn towards him tilting your head to the side unsure what he could possibly have to give you “i’m sorry?”

“a gift” he says and holds up a small box in his hand, holding your hand out he gently places the box into your palm. “what is this?” you tilt the box to the side trying to see if you’d hear something move around. “open it” and so you did just that, gently pulling the box open to reveal a silver ring with beautiful tiny flower details on it and a big yellow diamond on the center that glimmered beautifully in the sunlight. “my mother suggested i get you an engagement ring to make it seem like we’ve known each other longer and love each other to the public eye” you carefully pull the ring out handing him back the box and placing it on your left ring finger. holding your hand out to look at it on you, it truly was pretty.

“clever idea… i’ve never seen a yellow diamond before” you look up into his eyes not surprised to see him staring down at you, having felt him watch over your entire reaction. “they’re quite rare most places but in Tatooine they are common.”

“thank you” you smile at him, there was definitely worse people you could of been forced to marry and so far Anakin seemed like the lucky straw to pull. you could definitely work with this.

part 5

Tag List: @luvvfromme @bimbo-baggins86 @gatekeepingirlboss

ima tell you guys this now cuz i want you to pick up on the change but pay attention to how reader copes with anxiety and stress now just for future reference 🌝🌝 anyways next chapter is going to be the wedding and ball (because is it really bridgerton without a extravagant ball?) hope you huns enjoyed this chapter Xx<3 🤭

[pedrostylez]

Mi Cielo

pairing: Javier Peña x fem!reader

summary: reader and Javier are coworkers that typically hate each other, but find each other helpful in relieving that stress

rating: 18+ (no minors please)

word count:4.4k

warnings etc: smut, dirty talk, unprotected p in v sex, pet names, established relationship. Mentions of SA-the start and then Javi saves you, please do not read if this is triggering NO USE OF Y/N.

A/N: I thought about this being another prologue and then thought…nah, way too much admittance of feelings for this to be before that! Anyways, please enjoy, let me know if I misspelled anything or got anything wrong in regards to grammar, Spanish, etc. 

You and Javier had gotten into a routine. Every Thursday or Friday, you would lock the doors to the archives and head upstairs to see if he was still at his desk. If he was, you would drive yourself home and he would follow you 10 minutes later. If he had already left, you would drive to his place, greeting you with the door open and a beer held out to you, a smirk on his face. 

If you went to his place, you typically left right after, sometimes going out in the same evening, especially if it was a Friday. Peña knew you did it, and for the first few months, he tried to not let it bother him even though he was falling way too quickly for you. You refused to speak of what you were doing at the workplace, only allowing sidelong glances at each other before coming up with your system after the third time you had been together. 

At the end of the day he just wanted to be alone with you, and sometimes if it got to be too much he would purposefully flirt with your friends in front of you. Amy was always willing to speak to him, and he knew she typically would tell you about it after which was his only way to silently communicate to you that if he wanted to he could, but that he held out for you. He only wanted you.

Maybe that wasn’t his best method. 

Even with your stone-cold face never showing any ounce of discomfort with him flirting with others in the office, you take it out on him with actions. From leaving the cream out of his coffee when you brought in treats from the cafe around the corner, to only allowing a quickie with minimal talking, sometimes covering his mouth and taking your own pleasure followed by leaving in a rush to the bar with Susan. It had happened a few times now that he was still hard, on the edge of finishing with your heavy pants echoing in his ear as you hopped off of him and smiled at him, telling him that you were finished and flying out the door. Every time he was shocked, thinking he had finally gotten what he wanted-your attention-and then finding out it backfired. 

The final time he flirted with Amy in front of you was the breaking point. You watched him in the hallway just outside archives lean against the wall with his left hand, reaching for her hand and inspecting her nails. Amy giggled, completely unaware that just last night you were in his bed. You hoped that he smelled like you still, maybe just a little. 

Amy pushed his chest back and he pretended to stumble, glancing at you and his eyes whipped back to Amy, laughing and pushing past her up the stairs. Amy sighed, waltzing into the archives and seeing you already looking at her. “I swear, he gets dreamier every day!”

You gave her a grunt as acknowledgment, looking back down at your notes and trying to not break your pencil. “Are we still going out tonight?” You asked, crossing your ankles under your desk. 

“Yeah, let’s find someone hot for you tonight! You haven’t been laid in forever.” She pouted, grabbing files from your desk that were in the “put back” pile, and started going around to the shelves. She was one of the only ones you trusted to put your files away properly, and yet she was what Peña used to get under your skin. It wasn’t her fault. 

“You’re right, maybe I can find Robert again?” You mumbled, mulling it over in your head. He wasn’t horrible, he just wasn’t great. Had little skill, and you had to do most of the work. 

Peña was only halfway up the staircase, leaning against the wall listening to you make plans. 

After hours of letting it simmer in your bones, you were angrier when Peña walked into the archives holding a bunch of files you told him to return to you a week ago. He tried pushing your buttons immediately, and instead of keeping a straight face, you snatched the files out of his hands, shoving him with your shoulder. He scoffed, surprised by your actions but wanting to see more. 

“I told you to return these a week ago.” You growled, making his eyebrows rise to his hairline.

“Are you actually upset with me about that, or about Amy?” He was getting better at reading you, and he knew it when you rolled your eyes at him.

“Stop using her to try and get under my skin. She doesn’t know any better and I like her. If you don’t actually fuck her she’s going to come crying to me.”

He scoffed and rolled his eyes, shifting his weight to his other leg and watching as you put away more files. He noted you get more aggressive as you slid each one into place, knocking over one of the boxes and grumbling to yourself. 

He took a step toward you, trying to help pick up what you had knocked over and you yanked it out of his grip. He started getting frustrated, running his fingers through his hair as he watched your fingers twitch around the files he was just holding. You cemented it in your mind, hell-bent on going out. Fuck Peña, fuck your job, and fuck his stupid dick. You did not need him to get off. 

It was like he could read your mind as he stood over you and the box he grabbed from the ground. “Face it cariño, you couldn’t even fuck someone else if you wanted to at this point. I am the only one that knows what you need.” He was growling at you, hovering over you, and moving the box out of your reach so you had to look at him. 

“We will see about that.” You scoffed, pushing him away and setting the remaining files back on the shelf.  The line he was crossing over and over at work got on your nerves as you walked over to the archives door and opened it. Anyone could walk by, and it let there be an invisible boundary.

“What is that supposed to mean?” He was gripping the side of the shelving, ready to knock it over. He didn’t understand how multiple times now you had gone out with your friends, making him stay up late and wonder if you were alright. Didn’t you understand that he wanted your attention and the only way to get it was to piss you off? He didn’t want anyone else, and you shouldn’t either. 

“I am going out. I’m sure you listened in.” You spat, watching his cheeks redden at being caught. How could you read him so quickly but couldn’t tell that it was all just an act?

He sighed, exasperated with how you were responding. “Stop fucking around mi cielo, you’re mi-”

“I’m not, and you know it. We both agreed this was casual. Stop talking about this here.” You gritted your teeth and put your foot down, staring straight at him. “I’m tired of you acting like this. There is no skin to get under, you can do what you want, but you can’t be using my friends in front of me and then wonder why I am upset. I’m going to go out with them and have a good time.”

His jaw clenched, watching your arms cross your chest as he pushed the thought away of you in his car that first time and he sighed. Fine. “I’m going out too then.” He decided, not giving you a chance to respond before booking it out of the archives and out to the sidewalk for a smoke. You stressed him out beyond measure. 

Javier watched you leave the embassy with Amy and Susan, laughing about something and Amy waved at him. He was aware of Murphy watching him, agitated and answering the phone with rough hello’s, but didn’t bring more attention to it beyond getting him to stay at his desk and going down for intel himself. He had an inkling you were the cause of Javier’s frustrations.  Javier went home shortly after you left, getting ready quickly and making a few assumptions of what bar you would have gone to and headed out. He wasn’t planning on picking anyone up and only changed his pants to darker-washed jeans. 

He eyed you from the bar, whiskey in his hand and eyes dragging up and down your figure. That blue short dress stops at your mid-thigh, legs for days, and heels for the first time in a while. He knew you did it because he was going to be there.

He watched shot after shot being thrown down your throat, knowing you weren’t typically this drunk in public. He glanced at Amy who had been eyeing him all night and gave her a nod, downing the rest of his whiskey and deciding that no more would be needed. He felt satisfaction at knowing he had gotten under your skin coming out but knew he needed to be watchful. Something in his gut told him that if he wasn’t careful you were going to get hurt. Maybe he needed to stop putting you into these positions. 

You had only looked at Javier once the whole night, finding Robert, or really Roberto, apparently, (“Close enough” Susan mumbled at you clinking her glass with yours and laughing) and dancing with him and flirting to get free drinks. Tequila was flowing, and you felt like you could actually relax. You tried to not notice how Amy was eyeing Peña, looking to you to help her get in his pants. It wasn’t a lie to say that you were too drunk to really help. 

Roberto leaned down to your ear and asked in broken English “If you wanted to step outside for a minute.” and you happily agreed. He grabbed your hand, and it was the only other time you allowed yourself to look at the bar, seeing Peña fuming. His hand was on his chin, eyes glued to you as he made eye contact. You smirked, raising your eyebrows and dropping the connection, tripping on the back of Roberto’s shoes and laughing.

He waited two whole seconds before standing up and following you outside. He didn’t really care that Amy was walking in his direction or that Susan was watching him almost shake as he pushed through the crowd to the side door you disappeared behind.

And there you were, leaning against the brick as he pulled out a cigarette. If he had to watch he would, but he was going to need something to stop him from running over there. 

Your vision had honed in on Roberto, listening to him ask where you lived and maybe he could walk home with you and spend the night. You laughed, suggesting his place again before he leaned toward you and whispered, “How about here, puta?”

He grabbed you roughly and you tried to decline, laughing it off since you weren’t sure what that meant. Something in your memory of reading it on paper of quotes for intel told you it wasn’t good, but you still did not have the courage to ask Peña to help with translations. He was the only one that you were even tempted to ask, but he teased you too much about it for you to gather the courage. 

When Roberto grabbed at your hips in a bruising manner you shook yourself out of your thoughts, now uncomfortable. “Get the fuck off me, Roberto.” Your voice was muffled to your own ears, the tequila hitting you harder than you expected. 

Peña was halfway through his cigarette when he heard you tell Roberto to get off you. His eyes trailed up, seeing you wince away and try to shove, and Roberto’s smile was menacing.  How many guys had you turned down that were aggressive like this? 

Suddenly he was behind Roberto, seeing red. How had he gotten here, ready to defend you at a moment's notice after hating you for months? He grabbed his shirt and yanked him off you, twisting him around and punching him in the nose. The crack of cartilage vibrated through his arm, making him reel back and go for another punch. 

Roberto moaned, grabbing at his face and looking up at Javier shocked. “Get the fuck out of here!” He yelled, the guy skittering away with blood rushing down his nose and over his neck, yelling profanities. 

“Are you alright?” He turned around quickly, changing his tone to one of worry laced with irritation as he reached for your arms. You were shaking but also in a daze looking over his shoulder.

You were buzzed, irritated, and downright annoyed that Peña had followed you to the bar, and followed you to the alleyway, but felt sudden relief. You weren’t convinced the night would have ended well if he hadn’t stepped in. “I had it handled...” you mumbled, not believing yourself. 

“Are you fucking serious?” Now Javier was mad, shaking himself as he watched you wipe at your lips and shiver. “He could have hurt you. You had it handled?” He continued to observe you, your eyes darting around to anywhere but his face, elbows scraped up from being pushed against the building. He thought about softening his tone. 

“Yes.” You said, glancing up at his eye line. You lifted your shaking hand to your forehead to breathe when he lunged forward, pushing you roughly against the side of the building. “Javi-”

“Get me off you then, hermosa.” He didn’t want to pretend like he was going to hurt you, but something in him snapped with the way you were pretending to be strong, your actions gave you away. The shake in your hand, the way you clenched your jaw to hold back tears…

You struggled, picking up your knee to hit him but he avoided it, pushing you deeper into the brick and leaning forward to attach his lips to your jaw. He couldn’t help himself–your neck was shiny with sweat and while he was upset with your inability to see you were in danger, at least he was here–he could protect you.

You pushed, feeling yourself get ready to scream, tears leaking from your eyes and you started to give up. Why did Peña have to prove you wrong every time?  “I can’t.”

He leaned back, hearing the catch in your throat and heaving a breath on your face. He reached his hand up to your hair, feeling his heart crumble when you winced away. “I’m sorry baby-you scared me when you left and I…I know you can handle yourself if you have to, but I don't want you to have to.”

Tears were willingly falling now as you looked up at him, leaning into the hand that rested on your cheek. “What does puta mean?” Your voice was barely a whisper as he tensed up, fingers scratching through your hair as he pulled you to him. 

He sighed. “It means whore, mi cielo, did he call you that?”

You nodded into his chest, grabbing at his shirt around his waist. “And what does that mean? Cielo?”

“I’ll tell you another time. Will you let me take you home? So I know you’re safe?” He could have chased after that guy at that moment, but seeing you continue to shake gave him pause. He couldn’t let this happen again, and that meant he couldn’t keep trying to upset you at work. 

You nodded again, pulling away and wiping at your eyes. “Let me go tell Susan and Amy so that they don’t get worried.”

He watched you walk away, following close behind as you found Amy and Susan together, leaning in to tell them you were heading home. Susan eyed him, his hand hovering over the small of your back, glancing at Amy and then you again before nodding at him. Amy also looked at him, eyebrows raised in understanding that something more was going on, and he vowed internally to pull her aside next week and try and explain what he had been doing for months. 

He got you in his car, your head leaning against the glass and closing your eyes. He reached for your hand and squeezed your fingers, getting you to look at him. “I’m sorry.”

You shook your head, still dizzy from the tequila and not understanding why he was apologizing. “You don’t have to be.”

“I do, I–I keep trying to get you to react to me and I want you to see how much I want you and I am just going about it the wrong way. I know you want this to be kept under the radar, and I can understand why and I’ve been ignoring that by flirting with Amy in front of you.” He glanced at you, eyes focused on his profile and he sighed. “If I hadn’t been an asshole earlier then you wouldn’t have gotten into this situation, and I’m sorry.”

You paused, squeezing his hand tighter and leaning your head back against the glass. “Take me home, Javi.”

Javier had every intention of dropping you off at the door but watched as you stumbled and kicked off your shoes outside and he knew you were going to need more help. You hadn’t accepted his apology but didn’t deny it either, and that was as good as it was going to get. 

He got out of the car, his own keys placed in his pocket as he plucked yours from your fingers easily, unlocking the knob and opening the door, and ushering you in quickly, shoes being kicked in behind. He locked it behind him, turning around to see you stumbling with one heel in each hand mumbling how they were uncomfortable. 

No words were exchanged as he followed you up the stairs, hands hovering around your waist in case you took a misstep and into the bathroom. You dropped the shoes in your bedroom and turned around to him to show the zipper at your back. “Help me, please.”

He chuckled, holding up the collar of your dress with one hand as he clasped the zipper and pulled it down, finding you had nothing underneath. You went out like this? And he didn’t know? Maybe he was drunk. 

You slipped out of the dress the rest of the way, leaning forward to start your shower and turning to him. His eyes stayed on your face and he swallowed heavily, clenching and unclenching his hands. “You can look if you want Javier.”

That was all the permission he needed to rove your chest and center. His knees felt like jelly as he saw red marks on your hips from earlier. Anger bloomed in his chest, knowing those would become bruises. His eyes came back up to yours as he reached for the buttons of his shirt. “Mi cielo means 'my heaven,' hermosa.”

Your breath caught, watching as he too started to strip off his clothes from the activities of the night. “Why do you call me that?”

“Because it's true.” He said simply, letting his pants fall and kicking off his boots. “Being with you is heaven, and I don’t want to be with anyone else.”

Tears filled your eyes as you glanced at your bare feet, feeling self-conscious. “I don’t think I can give you what you want, Javier.”

He sighed, stepping forward to pet your hair and kiss your forehead. “I’ll take whatever I can right now, cariño. Okay? Don’t feel pressured to–to be with me.” It was a hard pill to swallow, but he could do it. Time and time again he just wanted to be granted the chance to be in your presence. “I am only with you.”

Tears slipped free as you turned and stepped into the shower, holding on to his hand for balance and then pulling him with you. No other words were needed as you washed and cleaned your hair, letting the water take Roberto’s marks with it. 

He knew you were too drunk to remember what he said in the morning, but the feeling still sunk in his chest that he had confessed to you what he was really feeling. Maybe he would have the courage to try again another night. 

The next morning you woke up to his arms wrapped around your waist, fingers trailing down to your pajama pants, and playing with the untied string. “Good morning.” He rumbled into your ear, breathing out a chuckle at how you tensed initially and then relaxed. 

“Did you spend the night?” You asked, tilting your head to look behind you and seeing he was bare-chested, only in his boxers, and glanced back up at his eyes. 

“No, I just snuck in this morning.” He joked, wanting to see what all you remembered from last night. 

“Please don’t leave, what if he followed us and knows where I live?” You cried, Javier helping the shirt over your arms and grabbing your face. 

“Okay, cielo, I won’t leave you. It’s okay he won’t come back here.” He kissed your forehead and ushered you to bed, climbing in behind you.

“Will I always be your cielo?” You whispered, feeling yourself doze off, your tongue unable to wrap around the word. The hot water didn’t seem to help you become more sober, and it made you a crying mess that Javier had to soothe and try to not worry over. 

He froze, closing his eyes and sighing deeply. “Yes baby, if you remember what that means in the morning then you can be.”

You laughed, lightly hitting his arm as you went to sit up. Flashes of the night before came to mind, hazy and confused but knowing that Javier was there to make sure you got home. “Thank you for taking care of me.”

He smiled, watching you stand and stretch as he lazed on your pillow. “Of course hermosa, do you remember much of it?”

You looked in the mirror, seeing your hips from lifting your shirt slightly, and brushed your fingers against the green bruises. They wouldn’t be deep, but you saw the way Javier’s eyes blazed with anger at seeing them again. “I remember that you were there to help me when shit was going downhill. And that I think Amy and Susan are suspicious.” You paused, squinting lightly to try and relive parts of last night. “And that puta means whore, but after you unlocked the door I don’t really know. Did we-?”

“No, you just asked me to stay and you were kinda mean about it whenever I tried to leave so I thought it best to wait.” He joked, not wanting to make you uncomfortable. You smiled at him, watching as he propped his head on his arm as he laid back flat, looking at your ceiling before you went back to bed and crawled over him. 

“How can I ever thank you?” You whispered, leaning down to capture his lips in a quick kiss before digging your nails into his chest, his heartbeat speeding up under your palm. He was already growing hard, thinking that even though he apologized last night that you might still be mad at him. He wanted to make it up to you. 

You released him, watching as his pupils blew wide and he reached for the back of your neck to pull you down again, biting at your jaw gently. “Get on your side mi cielo.”

Your heartbeat fluttered, recalling that word but unable to place it as you rolled off of him and put your ass to his center, sliding your pants and underwear down and off your legs as he lifted your left leg. He supported himself on one arm, grabbing at your hair to twist your head to look up at him as he rested your leg on his hip. He shoved his boxers down to release himself, resting his hardened cock on your inner thigh. “Stay there baby, are you wet for me? You want to thank me for last night?”

His fingers grazed your clit, making you gasp and reach back to his hip. He dipped down to your entrance, feeling your slick already begin to pool. “You feel like heaven, hermosa.” 

He chuckled as he watched the words click in your head, sinking into you with one hand in your hair, one on your clit encouraging you to keep your leg lifted for him. As he entered you, the hand between your thighs reaching to direct himself briefly before returning, your eyes rolled back and your jaw went slack, immediately on edge already. “Fuck–Peña-”

“Really?” He punctuated his frustration with a harder thrust making you squeak and grab his bicep quickly. “You still want to be professional with me after I have told you that you are literal heaven? Mi cielo? For fucks sake baby-christ-” He groaned, burying himself in you and pausing as he leaned down to your ear. “You don’t have to like it baby, but you’re mine and that isn’t fucking changing any time soon. Pretend all you want, but you call me Javi when I fuck you.”

He picked up his pace again, letting go of your hair and sitting up, maneuvering your legs to be on either side of his hips and him between your thighs, pushing your legs up for a different angle. His heaven, his Earth, his light, it didn’t matter-he couldn’t stop now. 

You couldn’t process what he was saying quickly enough to respond, your release sneaking up on you as you reached for his shoulders and dug your nails in, leaning your head back and exposing the column of your throat to him. He leaned forward brushing his beard and mustache against your neck as he breathed you in, groaning into his own release. 

When you both caught your breath, he pulled out, looking down at your heavy lids and wondered if he said too much. You reached for him, pulling his face toward yours to brush your lips against his and giggled. “Don’t be surprised if I don’t remember what that means, Javi.”

He let out a surprised laugh, kissing you quickly. “I’ll get you a book so you can work on it, baby.”

[eden4eva]

Come on bunny

Summary: Nick is a former barracks bunny, helping military men blow off some steam. This one man who won’t even acknowledge Nick storms into the barracks searching for him.

Warnings: smut!!, Mask during sex, cursing, degrading, slight choking, unprotected, coming inside, implied after care, little praise, slight spanking, hands tied up.

“OH FUCK!~” Nick screamed in pleasure as the man pounded into him, hitting his prostate and slapping his ass.

His eyes roll back into his head as his face is pressed into the pillows,

Nick looks like a drooling fucked out slut, getting back shots with his hands behind his back, yet he couldn’t be happier.

~Earlier~

The masked man stormed off the training field in anger. He couldn’t keep his gun straight causing him to miss most of his targets. He’s been pent up for a while, so he’s been stressed. His mind more focused on sex than his actual job.

The man swung open the door to the barracks, stomping through the hall he swung open nicks door. Nick was sleeping, the top off his head peaking out from under the blankets as he hugged one of his pillows.

The man’s face softened, he shut nicks door not caring about how loud he was being, the covers were yanked off his body startling Nick awake.

“Wha..” Nick mumbled rubbing his eyes trying to wake up.

It wasn’t often that he was woken up for sex but he wasn’t complaining when it did happen, when Nick first applied to be a barracks bunny he signed a form agreeing that it is ok to have sex whenever, of course if he wasn’t in the mood he could always say his safe word or color.

Nick yelped out when he was pulled to the edge of the bed by his ankles, he was flipped over on his stomach, the man gripped his hair and pulled his hair back roughly erupting a gasp from Nick.

Masked man pov

I yanked his shorts down dropping them to his knees, “fuck you like this? Huh? Like being used?” I groan out running my finger down the crack of his underwear. I watch as he burys his face in the mattress.

I frown in disappointment before landing a harsh smack on his ass. “Answer me.” I grip his ass cheeks roughly spreading them despite the fabric in the way.

“Yes!” I give his ass another slap.

“Again.”

“Yes! Fuck- please!” He moans out. I bite my lip and undo my belt throwing it behind me, I yank down his underwear, watching him gasp and squeeze his eyes shut. “What’s your color.” I watch him gulp and bite his lip “g-green”

I smirk traveling my hands up his thighs groping him again “such a good slut huh” I say spreading his ass apart, watching his hole clench around nothing.

“Oh god-please f-fuck me” I whines rutting his hips into the mattress. I grip his hair pushing his head back again, my lips by his ear “did I say you could hump the bed?” I whisper. I suck a hickey right behind his ear.

“No.”

I slap his ass “say it properly” I growl, my fist still in his hair as I pull it again, drool escapes his bottom lip.

“No sir!” He moans out. I push his face back in the mattress, standing up fully again I see his thighs shaking and clenching together, his cock leaky like he doesn’t get fucked every other day.

“Fucking whore, look at you shaking and i haven’t even touched you yet. How pathetic” I say I watch his hand grip the sheets, I smirk walking over to my belt picking it up off the floor.

“Give me your hands.” I say, he lifts his head snapping it in my direction, his eyes trying to scan over my face, my mask making it difficult to do so. I cock an eyebrow “I’m not repeating myself.” I growl. His hands slowly let go of the sheets his eyes not leaving mine as he put them behind his back.

I grip his jaw and shove his face back into the mattress grabbing his wrists roughly and securing the belt around his wrists.

I step back and take a look at him, smirking trailing my eyes down his body. His cock leaking on the mattress, legs spread and back arched.

I reach for his bed side drawer, grabbing a small bottle of lube and pouring it down his ass, watching it drip down his balls to the floor.

“Do you like teasing me or are you just an asshole.”

My head snaps up to meet his, his head is turned to the side and he’s glaring at me, yet he doesn’t look so dominant in this position.

“Drop the attitude.” I narrow my eyes at him he huffs and turns his head “fucking brat” I mumble slapping his ass. My finger circles his hole, pushing the tip of my finger in, then taking it out.

“Just fuck me already!”

My movements pause I move my hand away. I yank his hair pulling his head back to look at me “can you shut the fuck up.” I say through gritted teeth. My free hand moves up to grip his throat roughly, I apply pressure. Not enough to make him pass out but enough to get my point across. Moving my hands back by my side I let his face drop back into the mattress.

My hands move to unbutton my pants. Pulling the zipper down and letting them drop to my ankles.

I palm myself through my boxers my eyes falling shut. I look up at Nick, his eyes watching my movements. He licks his lips my eyes trail down his body.

my movements pick up as I see Nick slowly grinding his hips against the sheets, little whines and moans escaping him.

I tug down my boxers, nicks eyes widen when he sees my cock spring up against my abdomen. “What? Is it to big for you baby~” I tease watching his eyes narrow at me, “don’t flatter yourself” I scoff at him and roll my eyes at him.

I grip his ass, spreading him open my hand wraps around my cock, stroking myself slowly I let my head fall forward, biting my lip to stifle a moan.

Nick whines when my tip presses against him, pressing myself inside him inch by inch. He’s biting the sheets, his eyes squeezed shut “g-god fuck-don’t move yet” Nick whines out. I smirk “I thought I was to small for you” Nick stays quiet, his hands are in fists behind his back and he bucks his hips slightly

“Okay.. move” Nick says quietly, except I don’t, after a moment of us sitting there he lifts his head. “What are you doing move” he says. His lips are parted and theres drool dripping down his chin.

“Beg”

“Fuck off”

“I mean I can always pull out, leave you tied up”

“You wouldn’t dare”

I grin, slowly pulling my self out of him “wait!” I tries to grab ahold of me, his hands not bringing any help “you gonna beg?” He groans dramatically, rolling his eyes

“Please fuck me.” He says in a monotone voice

I raise a brow “you’re joking right” I smirk slapping his ass.

“Please fuck me- I wa- AH~”

I slam back into him, his head falling forward in instinct, my hips thrust at a brutal pace, his muffled moan filling the room.

My hand pressed on his lower back, my other hand gripping his hair pulling his head back. His back is arched perfectly I groan out in pleasure as nicks pornographic moans fill the room

“Such a slut yeah? You don’t care who it is you just want a cock inside you. Messing up your insides.” I thrust harder into him. Watching his eyes roll back and drool run down his chin

“P-please” he babbles, his hips thrust against the bed, chasing his orgasm.

If anyone walks by it wouldn’t be a secret what we were doing Nick couldn’t stop the moans coming out of his mouth even if he wanted to

My pace increases, fucking into him harder nicks hips match my pace, fucking himself on me. I slap his ass “such a good boy.” I groan out next to his ear my body pressed against his back fucking myself deeper into him.

“Fuckkk, I’m gonna fill you up yeah? Fill you up with my cum, watch it leak out of you” I grunt chasing my orgasm

“Oh god please!”

“Please w-what”

“Please fill me up! I need it! I want it so bad!”

my hips increased pace, I pressed his face into the mattress, my hand still gripping his hair as I pounded into him.

“I’m- your gonna make me cum!” Nicks hips rutted against the bed a loud gasp escaping him as he came. I fucked him through his orgasm, my hips stuttered as I groaned loudly coming inside of him.

I pulled out watching my cum drip out of his used hole, smirking to myself I trailed my eyes up his limp body again. My hands reached for the belt, undoing it i let it drop on the floor.

I pulled my pants and boxers up, before picking Nick up bridal style. His arms wrapped around me instinctively as he buried his face into the crook of my neck.

“Let’s get up cleaned up” I spoke softly, making my way out of his room.

•Tysm for reading



[beauty-and-passion]

CCCC Vol.1 - Cacophony: entering the lore (1/5)

Hello and welcome back to my analysis of CCCC.

Do you see that little beautiful number in the title? Well, the Cacophony act is long, I couldn’t fit an entire analysis into one single post. It would’ve been endless, Mucka Blucka alone took this entire first post!

So you will get the full analysis in manageable pieces and I will introduce each piece with a brief recap, so we won’t miss anything ;)

A brief recap of what we got from the Calamity act:

The events are stuck in a time loop, caused by the clash between Heart and Mind

Chonny starts to show his frustration regarding writing songs others already wrote

Soul is introduced and the poor guy is so tired of everything (from Heart and Mind to the loop), to ponder suicide. But in the end, he finds the strength to give it another try. Maybe things will be different this time.

<- Previous post - First post

_______________________________

Mucka Blucka (Intro to Cacophony): welcome to the lore

"I decided to do the ENTIRETY of MMMM, and it’d be very, very funny if the dumb chicken song was the most verbose in the album." (Chonny’s Q&A)

Well, it is funny that the stupid song got the honor of being not just the most verbose of the album, but also the introduction to the lore and the preview of what will come.

*

A clear vision: Chonny makes it clear from the very first verses that:

We will see his struggles, pain and dark thoughts  (“My blood, my sweat, my open doors”, as he will say in Taken for a Ride)

The songs are full of metaphors

There is a time loop ("So when we come back here again, and the start becomes an end/Consider this lamentation a foreword")

*

Awareness of the time loop: In Dream, Soul showed us he’s aware of the loop. Now Heart and Mind show the same awareness.

This confirms the point I previously made about all sides knowing the same stuff Chonny knows. No delay of information, here

This justifies Soul’s frustration even more. He knows they should come back into one and yet, the other two sides still haven’t learned a single thing after so many loops

*

The loop as a punishment: while talking about the loop, Heart and Mind say that they are “condemned” to repeat it.

From one side, none of them is taking the blame. It’s as if it’s not their fault, but the fault of something outside of them. Maybe an event that influenced them.

From a meta perspective, it’s very poetic/tragic, because Heart and Mind are condemned to clash every time, because of their contrasting natures. Because, as Chonny said in the Q&A, they’re parts of the same being and yet, they “can produce completely separate and juxtaposed conclusions from a single input”. So it’s not specifically their fault the loop happened: it’s because they are built this way.

*

Wanting and refusing the audience: Chonny wants an audience that listens to him, but at the same time, he acknowledges his audience isn’t able to understand his work:

Who will refuse to properly see The man behind the lines The triplicated rhymes

And later on, he says his audience cannot help him either.

This all anticipates and connects to Greener. In that song too, Chonny will show the same apparent contradiction - it will also be explained better, so for now, I’ll just point out how Chonny shows the same consistent vision.

(But yes, this thought is understandable. Every artist wants an audience, even if they’re not the main reason why art is made. Art is an artist’s need first and that’s particularly true in Chonny’s case. But we’ll talk about that in the Concord act.)

*

The current leader: First Soul wants to introduce us to their “poultric pullet commander”, then Mind immediately follows, by saying: “The coward in question? By now, you know him so well”.

And since we will soon learn that Mind doesn’t have a high consideration of Heart, we can safely deduce that yes, the current leader is Heart. And yes, this makes sense in the overall narrative.

*

Heart: Sisyphus, hate, the despited

Heart is Sisyphus: just like him, he’s forced to roll his rock up the hill (aka to keep their vessel moving forward). And every time he’s almost reached the top, every time he feels they’re accomplishing something, his efforts are in vain and they come back to square one. And he’s doing it for a very long time. Can’t really blame him, if he gets overwhelmed by pessimism.

Heart is associated with hate: as seen before, Heart can be pessimistic and dark, and that's because he’s not just the bearer of positive feelings. As he will say in The Heart Acoustic, he’s “the emotional side”, not the “positive emotions only side”.

Heart is the despited: he embodies all emotions and those are instinctual, uncontrollable forces. We always blame them (and consequently our hearts) when they make us do stupid shit.

(And how we’re aware we’re doing stupid shit? Thanks to our minds. So yes, Mind despising Heart for everything he does makes perfect sense too.)

*

Mind: time, berate, the freak

Mind is associated with time: a great reference to Ruler of Everything, a song about how time is the ruler of everything and, by association, how Mind is the ruler of their vessel… or at least, that’s what he wants to be, because for now their leader is still Heart.

Mind berates Heart and oh my god if he does it. He spends entire songs to diss the other side, "berate" is the perfect verb for him.

Mind is a freak: again, incredibly human and understandable. Not just because Mind is a freak (Heart himself will call him "automaton freak" and his appearance on the album cover is freakish too), but also because it's very common to associate cleverness with freakiness. The more clever someone is, the more they look/act like a freak. And who is more of a freak, if not the embodiment of the mind himself?

*

Soul: minutiae, amalgamate, the enlightened and the free

Soul is associated with minutiae, through a reference to 1984: just like Winston in the Ministry of Truth, so Soul feels in his powerful position, forced to drag himself through every futile, trivial detail. Like, you know, listening to Heart and Mind's "silly war" (The Bidding).

Soul is associated with "to amalgamate": again, his vision is clear, he remembers the goal. To become one.

Soul is the enlightened, because he's the only one remembering that goal from start to end and actively working for it. The other two get... well, a bit lost on the way.

Soul is the free: as stated in Dream, he's the most powerful of these three characters. The other two aim to control him, but Soul cannot be controlled.

*

A connection with Sanders Sides: these two lines made my brain immediately click

And sure, I lament the lack of a hen to share with in sick or in health But how am I supposed to love another when I barely know myself?

Why? Because they’re a lot similar to this line:

[Thomas]: Do I really know myself as well as I should?

and this line is the premise of Sanders Sides. So yes, it’s interesting (and understandable) that both stories open with the same idea of “not fully understanding yourself” as a starting point for a deeper exploration of the self.

The big difference is that Chonny takes one step further and doesn’t just tell he doesn’t know himself… but that he cannot pretend to love someone else, if he doesn’t know himself first. Which is the solution to the Thomas/Nico relationship I kept talking about for ages.

(I will write that post about these two series, I promise)

Also… remember this point about loving others when we will reach Concord.

*

About the Juno Incident: Chonny says that "there's a me stuck underground", clearly referring to the Juno incident and how Heart got stuck in the hole dug for Mind...

But, wait: the incident hasn’t happened yet. How can Heart be already stuck?

Unless the Juno incident is a fixed event of the time loop. Every time the loop restarts, the Juno incident happens, Heart misses Mind and gets stuck in that hole.

This also explains how they can talk about the incident in such clear detail and especially about the events before and after said incident:

One time they tried to sing to me About blues and greens; the in-betweens But mechanical hands decided where the Heart would be Just apathy I had been trying for years and for years that streamed To thrive, and relish entropy But when he finally shot at me Lines once solid were blurred

Heart says that they tried to find a compromise, an in-between (Night). But then, Mind slowly took over: he appointed himself as the new leader (Ruler of Everything) and decided Heart was beneath him. Heart’s reaction was a slow descent into apathy (Just Apathy), until he gave Mind full control of the vessel (The Heart Acoustic).

On the other hand, Mind says he tried for years to thrive, to keep their vessel up (Be Born, Storm and a Spring, The Mind Electric). But when Heart shot at him, he “blurred the lines”: his action reminded them both they’re not separate entities. They are the same entity. And that’s because:

And right as he (I) missed, my eyes in a mist I finally realized I shot at myself

Heart’s eyes were “in a mist”, because feelings are irrational and instinctual, so of course he didn’t act with a clear, logical mind.

Hence, he missed. But at the same time, he still hit a target: himself. Because what struck him wasn’t a bullet, but the consequences of an event. Specifically, the consequences of a failed romance.

But I will further explain this once we’ll reach Haiku and Hidden in the Sand. For now, as it was for most of this song, just keep this stuff in mind: we'll develop everything down the road ;)

Next post ->

(How about a coffee? ☕)

_______________________________

TAGLIST:

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[whxre-bxby]

For the hate-fucking with Brown or Ja, maybe they would hate each other because they like knew each other in the past (like high school rivalry) and they never outgrew it.

Or they're just really competitive keep trying to outdo the other.

Or when they woke up as recoms they were both really distraught by the situation and when emotions ran high they both said some hurtful stuff and after that they started hating each other

Just some suggestions! :)

Why not combine both into one :D , I chose the last idea. Thank you for your request!

Recom Brown x Recom f. Y/N x Recom Ja

Hatefucking with Brown and Ja

Masterlist (baseball cap buddies)

Summary: After waking up as recoms, many soldiers keep neglecting their emotions which leads to them exploding one day. Y/N gets into an argument with both Ja and Brown and they solve it by finally once giving in to their instincts and listening to their bodies.

Warnings: Smut, angst, cursing, arguing, manhandling, roughness, angry/hate sex, non-con, hurt/comfort, aftercare, threesome, orgasm denial, teasing, penetration, blowjob

Word Count: 6949

As you definitely already know by now, waking up in an Avatar wasn’t easy for the recoms. You all struggled but no one ever talked about it. Suppressing and ignoring is easier than acknowledging and solving. 

It’s an unhealthy strategy, you know that, but it does work. To a certain extent at least. Sometimes, bottling up emotions will cause them to suddenly burst one day. When that happens, things usually escalate. 

Now to bring up the inevitable, that exact thing already happened. 

About a week ago you lost your patience with two soldiers specifically. They broke too. 

You’re in the weaponry, holding a wetted rag in one hand and your assault rifle in the other. The weapon which now has scratches and a dent in it because of the way it was carelessly chucked at you by Ja. 

That was the first small spark of the huge fire that broke out that day. 

He’s clearly in a bad mood which infected you. His behaviour is unprofessional and you yourself aren’t in the best state of mind to be dealing with his moody self. 

But you have a little self-control left in you, so you don’t comment on his behaviour. You let it slide. Nonetheless, you’re pissed off. Your ears are flattened back and a frown is covering your usually cheerful face. 

Ja notices your mood change but it doesn’t cross his mind that it’s because of him. Sitting around the room on the other benches are Brown and Prager. Everyone is busy. Which is why Ja should focus on his work and not yours. 

“You’re doin’ it wrong.” he suddenly blurts out, breaking the heavy silence. The silence was comfortable and pleasant before he threw the weapon right next to you. 

Your movements of wiping the grease from the gun still and you ask yourself whether you heard that right. You hope for his sake that you imagined it because if he were to have the nerve to comment on your doings after his little childish fit, you would lose it. 

You glance up at him, studying his expression only to realise he did in fact say that and is now awaiting a reaction. Brown and Prager and now listening too. 

“You think I don’t know how to clean my own weapon?” You ask with an undertone of sass which has his ears flipping back too. 

“I can see you’re clueless.” 

That’s it. You can’t stand him anymore. “I’ve done this before. I know what I’m doing, dipshit.” you sneer at him, resting your hands on your lap while he stands in front of you. 

“Maybe that’s why our weapons haven’t been working properly lately. ‘Cause you have no idea what you’re doin’.” 

You’re speechless and boiling with anger. Who does he think he is?

“Maybe if you wouldn’t throw them on the fucking ground they would work just fine.”

Ja isn't able to fire back an argument at that. Perhaps he forgot he even mishandled your weapon. That could very well be the case. The number of overwhelming emotions have caused many of you to become hotheaded, but you were too angry with Ja to excuse his behaviour. 

You get up to stand at eye level with him. His stare is hard and intimidating now but you won't back down. You're not scared of him. 

"Don't start bitching to me about shit I know. It's not my problem you're all moody." You snap, provoking him by mimicking his voice in an exaggerated manner. 

"Moody?" He scoffs, taking a step forward to intimidate you. "You've been actin' like a bitch all day." 

You laugh at his pathetic comment. There's almost no point arguing with him. It’s like talking to a rude brick wall.

"I haven't even seen you today, until now." You reply. 

Prager steps up, walking a few steps closer to Ja and me. 

"Cut it out, both of you. We have to finish this in an hour." Prager says. He's right, we have a tight schedule and this is wasting time. 

Ja glares at him. "This doesn't concern you. She's been like this the whole time so I'm gonna deal with her now." 

You scoff, crossing your arms in front of your chest. "You don't have to 'deal' with shit. Brush it off like everyone else."

"Yeah, like that's what you do." He chuckles darkly.

"I let you, throwing my fucking weapon on the ground, slide earlier. I didn't call you out for almost breaking the door handle when you came in and I didn't complain about Brown not putting the fucking weights back." You snarl at Ja but now Brown stands up too. 

"Don't pull me into this shit." Brown says and Prager sighs before taking his weapon and leaving the room. 

"Just like your mess almost pulled me to the floor?" You continue to provoke, shifting your gaze from Ja to Brown. 

Brown had left his weights on the ground of the gym the other day instead of putting them back and you almost tripped over them after your workout. 

"Hey, I'm not the one blocking the shower for an entire hour." He snarls and you roll your eyes. 

"At least I fucking shower." You fire back. "Both of you smell like shit."

Ja takes offence again and glares at you as you turn around to pick up your weapon. The second you straighten your posture, a hand is on your shoulder and it roughly spins you around to face the two of them. 

"You do it on purpose don't you?" Ja snarls. 

His words catch you off guard. You don't understand. 

"What?" You ask, genuinely confused. Your angry tone fades with the question. 

"You wind us up." Brown adds, seeming to understand what Ja is saying. 

"I wind you up?!" You almost shout in disbelief. "Do you know how long I've been fighting the urge to punch you two?!"

They grin evilly at you, probably imagining you attempting to punch them. It makes you want to do it that much more. 

"I saved your lives you know?" You tease, shifting your weight from one leg to another. 

"Oh yeah, how?" Ja scoffs. 

"Pure self-control." You snarl, hinting at the fact that you're trying your best to not kill them.

"Something you both lack."

"Yeah, well you don't make it easy." Ja replies, stepping forwards so that he's all up in your space. His chest bumps against yours and your heart is racing. You tell yourself it's from the anger but really, it's because of them. Your hatred for each other has caused tension between the three of you. 

You don't know how to reply to that so you take a step back, trying to read his expression before your yes avert to Brown's. 

"What do you use? Is it some fuckin' body wash?" He asks and you just stare up at him in confusion.

" ‘S that why it takes you so fuckin' long to shower?" Brown grins scanning your body over. 

"What the fuck are you talking about?" You ask, upping the tone once more and crossing your arms in front of your chest.

There's a small pause while you await their answer. Both soldiers exchange looks before staring at you a little while longer. As if they aren't sure why you aren't catching on to what they're saying.

"Your smell. It's different." Ja says. You're at a loss for words. Are they seriously insulting your hygiene after mentioning themselves you take the most care of yourself?

"I smell different?" You ask in disbelief, trying to understand what is going through their heads. 

"You didn't smell like this before." Brown adds. You feel like you’re going mad. What the actual fuck are they talking about?

"Before what?" you fire back, trying to get to the bottom of this.

"Before we became recombinants. When we were human." Brown replies. Their eyes are fixated on you and their full attention makes you slightly nervous. You’re not used to this. 

“What are you even saying?” You ask again, telling yourself you will just leave like Prager if they don’t start making sense soon. 

Ja exhales loudly and still looks angry at you. 

“You expect us to be able to work properly with you smelling so fuckin’ good?” 

The words slowly sink in and you realise they are actually not insulting you. That’s a surprise. 

“Whatever you’re usin’, let it be.” Brown growls, backing up Ja. They both seem fed up. 

You think about their words and reactions for a minute, putting the puzzle pieces together in your mind while they just watch you. 

Suddenly, an idea comes to mind which has it all making sense and you gasp in shock before bursting out in laughter. 

Now it’s their turn to be confused. Ja and Brown exchange a quick questioning glance before turning back to you. 

“What so fuckin’ funny?” Ja asks. His bad mood is still very much present.

You have to pause your giggles to explain. 

“There’s no body wash in the bathrooms you morons.” you wheeze, holding your side to prevent stitches. “We’re not even allowed to use it.”

They don’t quite understand and continue to cluelessly stare at you.

“Poor babies, you’re going through your cycles.” You coo teasingly, trying to piss them off even more. 

Both their ears instantly flip back at the pet name and it makes you grin even more.

You turn away, wanting to wash the cloth you were just cleaning your gun with but once again, you’re pulled back to them and turned around. Ja tugs you back with such force you land right in front of them, almost bumping into their chests. 

You sigh, finally being able to relax your aching facial muscles from the laughing. “You didn’t read the documents did you?”

They stay silent for a few seconds before shaking their heads. Apparently, you were one of the only soldiers who read all the information about the new bodies. 

“Being all frustrated and moody tricks your body into thinking it’s your fucking seasonal cycle. Then you get all angry and horny for one specific person.” you grin evilly, pushing Brown’s chest back to create some sort of space between you and them. He just stumbles back one step, suddenly listening intently. 

“You’ve been honoured with me.” You tease. “Too bad you hate me and vice versa.”

Something in the atmosphere changes. Their gazes are no longer curious, but predatory in a way. 

“You’re serious?” Ja asks. His voice seems deeper than before. 

“Yeah, I wouldn’t make this shit up. The last thing I’m doing is trying to get in your pants, asshole.” you snarl. The insults naturally come to you at this point and you’re not sure whether you’re even speaking the truth. 

“Quit it with the attitude.” Brown growls. The way he says the words makes shivers run up your spine but at the same time it pisses you off.

“Me? Look at how you’re fucking behaving. Leave me the fuck alone before you fall in love.” you torment him, taking a few steps back to reach for the cloth again. 

“You’re too much of a bitch to even like.” he snarls at you. You would have thrown insults back if you’re wandering eyes wouldn’t have accidentally landed on his crotch. They then flickered over to Ja’s pants and he seemed to have the same problem.

This is pathetic. “Awwh seems you really have it bad for me.” you fake a sweet voice, giving them puppy eyes. 

“Yeah?” Brown scoffs. “Not the only one. I can fucking smell you Y/N.” 

“Apparently you always can.” you fire back, trying your best to avoid being exposed like them. 

“Why do you make everything so hard for us?” he sneers and you chuckle. 

“Literally or figuratively?”

“Bitch.” he growls, muttering the curse under his breath. 

“That’s your problem.” you say, shrugging your shoulder and turning your back to them once again. If they spin you around once more you will deliver a punch to one of their faces. 

“Our problem.” Ja corrects and it makes me scrunch my face in confusion. The fuck does that mean?

“Glad you have something in common.” you mutter, not bothering to give them your full attention anymore. 

“And I’m gonna deal with it.” Brown mumbles, probably talking to Ja but you overheard what he said. You want to turn around and question him but suddenly, a hand wraps around the base of your queue while the other catches both your wrists behind your back. 

You gasp in surprise at the sudden roughness but before you can comprehend who is doing what, you’re being pushed forward. Your chest and face are pressed down against the hard surface of a metal table. 

You can hear Ja chuckle from somewhere behind you but it’s now clear to you that Brown has had enough and is pinning you against the furniture. 

“You don’t know when to stop, do you?” Brown teases, growling the words. You hiss at him, trying to break free from his harsh grip but it’s useless. 

“Get off of me you son of a-”

He chuckles darkly at your miserable escape attempts. “Then don’t think that I will. By the time we’re done, you won’t be able to fucking talk like that anymore.”

Within moments after he speaks those words, you can hear him unbuckling his belt. You freeze, wondering whether you heard that correctly. Was he being serious?

When his hands start roughly opening yours and tugging down your cammies, you realise he wasn’t playing around anymore. 

Your body is in a state of unexpected shock and you don’t quite know how to react, but your stomach still continues to twist in excitement. An excitement they can smell. One that clouds their minds with lust and blinds out all common sense.

Ja comes around the table, squatting down in front of you and grinning at your helpless and surprised expression.

“Thought we’d let you just leave after all that?” he teases, lifting his hand to demeaningly stroke your cheek. You tilt your face away from his touch but he grabs your jaw and makes you look at him while Brown continues to strip your bottom half naked. 

“Why the fuck are you doing this?” you hiss at him in between struggles, hating how easily they took control of the situation. “I thought you- hated me.” 

Brown has now removed both of your pants and underwear and his large hand suddenly slid over the curve of your ass before roughly groping at it. It makes you whimper when you feel how mean he is being with you, definitely leaving the skin red. Ja glances up at Brown and when his eyes meet yours again, his grin has grown wider.

“Yeah, I fuckin’ hate you. Your attitude most of all.” he chuckles, deeply staring into your eyes. “But at least we can fix that.”

You frown, wishing you could slap that smirk clean off his face. But he isn’t taking you seriously. Not when you’re bent over a table, half naked and being manhandled by his friend.

Suddenly, Brown delivers a stinging slap to the area his hand just assaulted and it makes you flinch. You have to bite down on your lip to prevent yourself from crying out. Something tells you that even tears won’t help you out of this. 

“But there’s no denyin’ that you’re the hottest bitch around.” he grins, before getting up and pushing your head to the side. 

Above you, Brown chuckles again and you feel his hand slide lower until his two fingers slip down between your shamefully wet folds. 

“You’re sure you don’t have the same problem as we do, baby?” he asks, teasing you for being equally as worked-up as they are. 

“Never in a hundred years would I feel any sort of attraction to you idiots.” you spit your words, trying your best to still resist. 

“Guess we’ll find out.” he replies. His voice sounds strained. “I’ll fuck you dumb, Y/N.”

His words startle you and in the next second, Brown thrusts forward and his tip instantly penetrates your throbbing pussy. Your hands ball into fists at the intrusion and you press your forehead against the cold table, clenching your eyes closed. It felt different than you remember. Maybe it’s because your Avatar isn’t used to this.

Brown hisses in pleasure, not stopping his movements until he is buried balls deep inside of your dripping cunt. 

“Fuck-” he groans, letting go of your queue and now just holding your hip and wrists behind your back. “So tight.”

You whimper, clenching your jaw. “It hurts.” 

Your voice is quiet and shaky but he hears you. He hesitates to move after what he heard you say. To test the waters, he slowly pulls out, keeping just the tip of his dick between your lips. His eyes peer down to where you two are connected and his whole body freezes when he spots a few specks of blood. He knows very well it’s not from him and now he isn’t only questioning what he is doing, he’s regretting his actions. 

His eyes are wide with shock as he just stares at it. His thoughts are racing and his heartbeat picks up. What made him think he could do this to you? Instantly, his hands let go of you and you let them fall to your sides. 

Ja notices something is wrong and glances under your tail to be met with the safe horrific site his friend is seeing. It’s horrific to them, but surprisingly less bad for you.

They don’t understand. You’re scent clearly told them you were ready for sex and it fueled their instincts to mate. Now, seeing the potential harm they caused, snaps them back into reality for a few moments. 

“Shit- Y/N, I thought you wanted…” he stops mid-sentence, being reminded of your protests. We’re they that ignorant?

To their horror and confusion, you suddenly look calm. Your body is relaxed and you scoff, rolling your eyes. 

“I’m bleeding aren’t I?” you ask, feeling almost certain you know what is happening. 

“Yeah…” Brown replies and Ja takes a step back, not sure how to react. “Fuck, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to hurt you like this. I-”

“Brown, calm the fuck down.” you say, silencing not only his panicked voice but their worried thoughts. 

Your tail lifts higher and you caress his jaw with it, looking over your shoulder with a grin. He doesn’t move away, he lets it happen. The silence makes him uncomfortable and he draws his hips back a little to completely remove himself from you but suddenly, you push back against him. Your hips follow his and you slide yourself back on his dick, taking him slightly deeper than just the tip. 

He freezes again, watching you in confusion and shock. Neither of the soldiers understood what was happening but watching you willingly press yourself up against him again made his dick twitch. Almost making him harder than before which is nearly impossible. 

“Tha Avatars are virgins. It’s normal.” you say, hoping to help them realise they didn’t hurt you in the way they feared. You didn’t expect to bleed because you didn’t bleed when you lost your virginity as a human. Either way, you know it’s nothing to be worried about. 

Both men are silent as they start to rethink everything and process what you just said. Then Brown speaks up, wanting to make sure he understood correctly.

“You’re okay?” he asks. His voice is tainted with worry and you can hear a small tremble. 

You chuckle, facing forwards again. “Aw, look at that. You guys give a shit about me.” 

Behind you, Brown and Ja exchange looks again. As if to make sure they’re both back on board with their original plan. 

“Main thing is you act like ‘big boys’, being all mean and grumpy and then you almost cry about a few drops of blood.” You laugh at them, with the full intention of winding them up again. You don’t know why you do it, but it's amusing to you because it’s so easy to get under their skin. 

You wiggle your hips against Brown for a few seconds and that’s all it takes for his original self to be back on you. 

“I knew you do it on purpose.” he snarls but you know he is grinning to himself. Now you know that he likes it, even if he complains about your bitchy behaviour. Maybe you need to be like this more often. 

“Do what?” you ask, playing dumb which makes him chuckle. Fuck, do you do things to him. 

“If anyone’ll be cryin’ it’ll be you on my dick.” he says, groping the soft flesh of your hips. Brown loved how soft you were. It very often made him weak when he would watch you. Now, he gets to touch you 

“Make it happen before you have another crisis.” you tease, and with that Brown thrusts forward once more. This time, he goes slightly harder than before. 

You inhale sharply, stretching your arms forward to hold on to the edge of the table. He pauses, tapping the insides of your ankles with his boot for you to open your legs wider. You move one and he doesn’t bother to wait for the other so he kicks it to the side. 

The pain is very mild and is rapidly fading away each time he thrusts forward. 

Ja moves in front of you again, leaning down to look at you. 

“Dirty girl,” he tuts. “Been needin’ this, huh?”

You stare at him, trying to look composed but your lips constantly fall open in synch with Brown’s movements. 

“Needed us to take care ‘f your pretty pussy.” he coos and oddly, the words make you let out a silent moan. He notices your attempt in hiding it. 

“Not you specifically.” you push the words out unevenly because you feel like the air is being fucked from your lungs. “You just got lucky.” 

Brown was listening and he hums before spanking the sweet spot under your ass. It makes you yelp and jolt forward. Suddenly, he picks up the pace, thrusting harder into you than before and you feel like you forgot how to breathe. 

“You wanna cum?” Brown asks, seeming slightly agitated by your attitude again. 

“You can’t make m-”

Before you can finish your sentence, he shuts you up by reaching beneath you and softly brushing his fingers against your clit. As if he knew what you were going to say so he decided to prove you wrong instead of answering. 

“You wanna clench down around my dick? Finally let go and let me take care ‘f you?” he asks, leaning forwards to reach your ear. 

Ja is looking up at him with a doubtful and questioning expression. 

The offer sounds good but you choose to not answer. 

“I’ll take real good care of ya.” he whispers through his heavy breathing. “Fuck you until you’re full of cum. I’ll have y’er legs shakin’ and shit.” 

You whimper, feeling overwhelmed. It’s as if he knows exactly what your desperate body needs. 

“You want that?” he asks, urging you to answer by fucking you deeper. You feel so close, loving the way he seems to fill you with the girth of his cock while rubbing your clit through your wet lips. Everything suddenly seems perfect. 

“Yes-” you whisper, closing your eyes. 

“Can’t hear ya.” Brown breathes out, seeming to struggle to control himself.

“Yes!” you cry out, arching your back against him. “Please, please. Fuck-” Your hips push back once again. Any second now your orgasm will hit you. 

He chuckles again but it almost goes unheard because you’re about to be flooded with pure bliss. Brown straightens his posture again and suddenly, his hips still. 

You open your eyes, wondering whether he was readjusting his position but he just stopped. 

In confusion, you turn your head and look up at him over your shoulder. There’s an evil smirk stretched across his face and suddenly you realise he screwed you over. 

“Bad girls don’t get to cum.” he says, clearly amused by how confused and desperate you look. 

“You’re fucking kidding-” you breathe out. He shakes his head no, looking at Ja who is now grinning too. 

In a last attempt to please yourself, you rock your hips back and forth on his dick. Brown’s hands fly to your hips and he curses while digging his fingertips into your soft flesh, holding you still. 

“Fuck- you slutty girl.” he swears. 

Brown had to force himself to stop even though he wanted nothing more but to have you cum around him. He felt the need to fill you up and he will, but first, he and Ja need to teach you a lesson. One you won’t forget. 

Ja stands up and starts to unbuckle his pants in front of you. 

“Choke on his dick and I’ll think about it.” Brown says, tugging your hair back and making you look up at Ja. 

“You assholes-” you mumble, still trying to calm down your breathing. Brown decides to take it up a notch and he slaps your pussy, making the area of your clit stingy unexpectedly. 

You whimper, flinching again and tightening your grip around the edge of the table. 

Ja pushes his pants down to his mid-thigh and you stare at him. We’re they both naturally this big or was it because we have Na’vi DNA now? Either way, it’s extremely intimidating and they is no way you think you can fit that in your mouth. You’re surprised you’re managing to take Brown who is still balls-deep inside you as we speak.

“Do it and I’ll let you cum.” Brown says, tilting your head up further to force your mouth open.

“If you listen, I’ll be nice when it’s my turn.” Ja grins, cupping your jaw now to replace Brown’s hand. Your eyes widen at the statement. His turn? You’ve never done anything like this. It’s always only been one person. 

“You guys are so cruel.” you mutter, tipping your ears back and drooping your tail in defeat. Both men would almost feel sorry for you if you wouldn’t have had such a rude mouth before. 

You huff out a sigh and Ja shifts closer, so you open your mouth. Your tongue slips past your lips and he rests his tip on it before inching forwards again. 

You make sure to show your display of annoyance when wrapping your lips around his dickhead and gently suckling on it. But Ja isn’t looking at your eyes, he’s watching your saliva-coated, plump lips close around his girth. His body shudders and he places a hand into your hair, unable to tear his gaze away from your mouth. 

You gently worship his tip, swirling your tongue around it before pressing it up against the slit of his dick. A low grumble erupts from deep within Ja’s chest and his muscles flex to prevent him from thrusting forwards into your warm mouth. 

Proceeding with pleasuring him, you remove your lips from his tip and start sloppily licking up and down his length. Your tongue starts at his balls, slowly moving up and tracing along a vein until you reach his tip again. 

“Fuckin’ hell…” he murmurs, clenching his stomach muscles in pleasure. 

Behind you, Brown slowly pulls out of you, making sure not to trigger your or his orgasm just yet. However, you relax at the feeling of him moving again and let your mouth fall open. Ja uses this to his advantage, almost shoving half his length into your mouth. You don’t protest, you take it. Moving your head forwards, he already brushes against the back of your throat. The uncomfortable feeling makes you freeze your movements so that you won’t gag. Instead, you hiccup while he’s stuffed in your mouth and he grins. 

“That’s it,” Ja praises, watching you fight back your gags. “So fuckin’ good for me.” 

You look up at him with glassy eyes of slowly forming tears and he almost loses himself in them. Ja feels pity for you and looks back to Brown who is intently watching you work your way down Ja’s length. 

“She’s bein’ good. C’mon.” he urges his friend and Brown’s eyes flicker up to Ja. 

He nods with a smirk, deciding to tease you a little more before giving in to his and your desires. Brown holds his dick and glides his tip between your folds, watching with dilated pupils how your hips naturally chase his movements in an attempt to stuff yourself full with him again. 

“Shit, you have it bad, huh?” he coyly teases, once again lifting your tail to clear his view of your dripping and throbbing heat. 

Your ears tip back again. Not as bad as they had it earlier. It’s their fault for getting you so worked up now. 

Brown notices the return of your attitude but this time it doesn’t annoy him, it fuels his lust for you.

He leans back down to you, placing his lips near your right ear and whispering, “I’m gonna fuck your pretty pussy until it hurts.” 

Your eyes widen at his words but he almost instantly draws back, not waiting for your reaction. You stop paying attention to Ja for a few moments, especially when Brown snaps his hips forwards once more and fills you to the brim with his cock. Almost instantly, your back arches and he grabs a hold of your hips, starting to roughly fuck himself into you. 

Ja gently nudges his hips forwards too, slowly urging you to take more of him. You resume your previous actions, and after a few minutes, you realise you can’t think straight. Your eyes flutter closed in pleasure every few thrusts and your mouth is hanging open with small droplets of saliva spilling from the sides. You can’t concentrate on Ja anymore and he pulls away. However, he isn’t disappointed in the slightest. Seeing your fucked-out facial expression is a sight he never wants to forget. He would have had to pull away anyway because he didn't want to cum just yet. The first time he gets to have you, he will release his load into you, to mark you as his. Well, Brown’s and his. Brown seems to have the same plan. 

Brown’s thighs are slapping against the back of yours with each harsh thrust. He’s plunging his dick as deep as he can into you while digging his fingers into the flesh of your ass. To him, you are the most attractive and sexy thing he has ever seen. He never expected himself to be attracted to an Avatar, not even when he became a recombinant, but at the end of the day, it was you. And you are the best girl out there in both their opinions. 

Your new body kept the slim waist you used to have and your soft hips and thighs. They never touched you before but they remembered your body.

“Mmm- fuck, ‘m so close.” you whimper, spreading your legs even further apart and giving yourself to him. Your movement makes Brown hiss. Seeing the girl he was secretly chasing, offer and open herself to him like this is a gift from heaven. Brown and Ja both desired you for a while, which is why their attraction to you spiralled out of control today. It’s another reason why they hated you. You were a bitch to them that they found hot, and it angered them that they had to resist you. At least until now. You had no right being so nerve-killing while looking good. 

Brown once again decides to play with you, wanting to overstimulate you in the slightest. His hand once again dips under you and he’s rubbing his middle fingers between your lips and over your clit repeatedly. 

You cry out, trying to distance yourself from the rough touch. Your body was still very sensitive from almost cumming before. But Brown held you in place and you had to embrace it, taking everything he’s giving you. 

“Just like that baby,” he groans, “Cum for me.” 

He continues exactly what he’s doing and the more you tense your body, the faster your orgasm approaches. It hits you like a huge wave, making you hold on to the edge of the table until your knuckles turn white. Your tail stretches upward and is trembling along with your legs. In a desperate attempt to prolong the bliss, your start pushing your hips back against Brown’s to meet his thrusts. 

His breath gets caught in his throat and the mixture of your pussy clenching around him, almost sucking him in and refusing to let him pull out and seeing you fuck yourself on him again has Brown cumming. 

His hips stutter and he’s sloppily humping your behind, finally shooting his load into your begging pussy and keeping you filled up by plugging your entrance with his cock. Your movements calm down and after a few moments, you’re both still and regaining your breath. He wasn’t lying when he said you’d be crying on his dick. A few tears of pleasure and overstimulation have already run down your cheeks. 

He knows he’s been mean with teasing you and he loves how well you took his handling, baring through it all. Brown snakes an arm around your waist, lifting your upper body so that you’re standing in front of him while he stays buried deeps inside you. His arms embrace you from behind, holding you against his chest to make sure you don’t lose your balance. Brown rests his chin on your shoulder before nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. 

“You’re so good,” he whispers in praise, still not letting your warm body go. 

This is a new side of him you’ve never seen and it makes you instantly melt and relax against him. You weren’t expecting to be treated so nicely after the argument you had earlier. 

“Best girl out there.” he adds. His heavy breathing calms and gently fans against the skin of your neck. The praise sounds so rewarding. 

You lean back and close your eyes for a few seconds, relaxing and regaining strength after almost losing control of your trembling body. 

Ja walks around the table, watching your interaction before stopping in front of you. Your hazy eyes slowly open and meet his. His hand reaches for you and he leans forward, closing the gap between your lips. You don’t resist. Sure, there were occasions where both of them really got on your nerves and you were sure that if you had a loaded gun in your hand during those times, you would kill them. Earlier today, your weapons weren’t loaded. But somehow you seemed to solve each other's problems now, so why not let it happen? 

His hands were all over you, skimming down your waist before gently starting to bunch up the cloth of your tank top. You let him slip it off you while Brown watched, still not removing himself from inside you. Brown’s fingertips traced along your ribcage, exploring the new skin you showed them while Ja started fumbling with your sports bra, slowly tugging it up and over your head so that it could join your pile of clothes on the floor. 

You were completely bare in front of them but since your body was cradled between them so you didn’t feel exposed to the room.

“God, you’re so fuckin’ pretty…” Ja whispers, staring at all of you. Behind you, Brown hums in approval and you can feel the vibrations come from his chest. He continues to hold you while Ja cups your breast and kisses you again. 

You’re so lust-drunk even after the orgasm Brown gave you, you moan into the kiss. It drives Ja wild, and he intensifies his actions. 

“My fucking turn.” he grumbles, pulling away and staring down at your bare pussy. Brown obliges. He’s had his time with you, now Ja should too. 

Slowly, Brown retracts his dick from inside you, leaving you sore and hollow. You let out a soft whimper as he pulls away, being nudged against Ja’s now bare chest. He holds you upright while Brown sorts himself out, probably putting his pants back on. 

After a little less than a minute, I feel Brown’s presence behind me again. It confuses me but Ja doesn’t seem to have a problem with it.

His left arm once again wraps around your waist, tighter than before and his right hand stretches down to grab the backside of your knee. Ja reaches for your other leg, placing his palm on the back of your thigh before both men suddenly lift your feet off the ground. You hold on to their arms, gripping their biceps in an attempt to steady yourself. The sudden movement is a surprise to you. 

“Don’t worry, sweetheart.” Ja grins, placing one of your legs over his shoulder while Brown continues to effortlessly hold you in the air. “We got you.” 

You’re staring at him with wide eyes, definitely impressed by their strength. Ja doesn’t waste time with you. He’s already pressing his leaking tip against your entrance. The fact that Brown’s cum is dripping out of you doesn’t bother him at all. As long as it’s either of them fucking you and no one else, they don’t have a problem with it. 

“Ready?” he asks, helping Brown hold you up by holding the underside of your thighs. 

You gulp nervously, still feeling slightly sore from Brown’s brutality. 

He smirks. “I’ll be careful.”

You exhale shakily before nodding. “Okay.”

He pets your thigh as if to show you he liked your answer before he starts to slowly enter you. You squirm in their arms but they keep a firm hold of your body, holding you in place until Ja bottoms out. It’s easier for him to enter you after your pussy has been worked open by Brown. 

“Good girl,” Brown whispers into your ear. “Show him how well you can take him.”

You let your head fall back against his shoulder, faintly nodding your head. 

Ja’s lips are parted and his mouth is slightly hanging open as he pants. It’s been too long since either of them have felt pleasure like this. Too long since they’ve been with a woman, but hell, you beat them all. 

Ja is starting to hastily thrust himself inside you while watching your expression. It seems so soreness has faded or at least it’s been concealed by lust once more. He is also still stimulated from your sloppy blowjob so Ja has to hold back a little to not cum instantly. He’s into messiness and sloppy sex. It’s his favourite thing, which is probably also why the squelching sounds of your slick and Brown’s cum along with the way the fluids are dripping down you and coating his length, turn him on even more. 

“Got one more in ya?” he asks between breaths. At this point you’re so mindblown by the way they have and are fucking you, you could cum on command. 

“Yes- fuck. It’s so good-” you breathe out, arching your back again and throwing your head back. Brown’s lips attach to the side of your neck and he nibbles and sucks on your skin. The hickey that he is forming is the least of your concerns. To be completely honest, you want to be covered with them. You want to be theirs in every way possible. 

“Let go baby, can’t hold it much- longer.” he struggles to say. The feeling of your wet cunt welcoming him in is exactly what he needs.

And just like on command, you cum. Brown holds you tighter while your body trembles and your toes curl. You’re a moaning mess and a few seconds after you, Ja is stuffing your pussy full of his cum, emptying his load into your drenched hole. 

He’s cursing your name and holding you so tightly, his hands leave red marks on your thighs. 

“Goddamn. Didn’t know you had it in ya.” Brown grins, continuing to steadily hold you while you and his friend calm down. 

“Might have to start forgetting to put away gym equipment on purpose now.” he chuckles, and you scoff and Brown’s joke. 

“The only reason this happened is because you morons can’t keep your shit under control.” you say. You would have been fine. They were throwing a tantrum. 

Brown frowns. “And just like that, the good girl is gone again.” 

“Good girl my ass, this is your doing.” you reply. They’re the reason you get so annoyed with them. 

“Maybe we just need to keep fuckin’ her. Then she won’t be talkin’ to us like a bitch anymore.” Ja adds to the conversation. 

“Permanent sex to keep your filthy mouth closed and bad attitude gone.” Brown chuckles. 

“Forget it, I’m so done right now.” You shut their idea down as your voice slowly recedes to a whisper. You’re exhausted. 

They don’t argue with you and carefully place you back on the ground. While you all get dressed you continue to throw insults each other's way but at this point, it’s all playful. 

You’re all behind schedule now with your tasks so you sit down again and get back to work on cleaning your weapons. For the next hour or so, all three of you continue talking. The teasing doesn’t stop but you’ve discovered that you hate them a little less now.

Tag List: @ken-dala @drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed @numarusworld @number1gal @ikranwings @jatwow

[worstqueerbaittournament]

Before you complain about the picture: I asked people to send in better pictures of Grif and Simmons and NOBODY DID

Submission message for Janis: Mean Girls  - Janis + Person who submitted Janis here. Yes, I meant the movie. The whole time it is implied she's a lesbian only for her to end up with a dude lol

Submission message for Grif and Simmons: Hi! I’m submitting Grif and Simmons from Red vs. Blue. I think they’re the worst personally because I’ve spent a third of my life being queerbaited by someone’s fucking halo ocs.

Additional propaganda: Meanwhile Janis from Mean Girls IS queerbaiting:

    She’s presented as a lesbian throughout the film

    She gets very emotionally attached to girls and tries to sabotage them after they ‘betray’ her and become more interested in boys/popularity (Regina in the past, Cady during the film)

    Proudly declares herself a “big lesbo” to half the school during her trust-fall scene

    Wears a suit to Prom and kisses her gay best friend Damien, they both show complete disgust afterwards

    But in the LITERAL LAST SCENE OF THE FILM, she’s shown dating a guy and kissing him.

((I also haven’t seen the musical yet, so I can’t comment there))

Vote Janis, she’s the only right answer.

this ain't enough information about Grif and Simmons; these two are literally the intro character for the entire series. The first conversation they had became a running joke and repeating theme to the point that, years later, it was used in a dramatic moment so Grif could identify Simmons while fight an evil look-alike. When one of them got injured, the other donated various body parts, including skin and organs, and then became a cyborg, thus having the metaphor of "becoming part of each other" and "you have my heart". They still bicker constantly and and trade insults. They've been glued at the hip for more than a decade. The one time they were split up, it was treated like a devastating divorce, with one of them using the line "I quit you". They then both proceeded to have mutual pining and emotional withdrawl from being apart because they're just THAT codependent. They've been forced to share living space, and immediately devolved into having old-married-couple situations. During a planet-wide sex party, they fooled around in a closet, everybody knows this happened, but they refuse to fully acknowledge it. The VA for Grif even plainly stated that "Grif is in love with Simmons". Simmons once mentioned that he and Grif carved their initials into a tree. When we see the "inner worlds" of their minds, Grif's is almost empty except for a tiny Simmons that runs around to annoy him, and Simmons imagines a Grif that has to do whatever he says, but STILL insults him because Grif can't stop being Grif.They had a talk show together and even called themselves their ship-name "Grimmons". They've been having one long conversation for 2 decades. They're slow-burning like a tire fire. They're married, but they'll never properly get together. IT'S BEEN 2 DECADES

Let's not forget Tucker's actually-in-the-show commentary when he's spying on them over the radio of "I've only been listening to them for five minutes but I can tell they're really in love. Why can't they see it?”

It's literally been two decades.

[bigtittiecomitte]

“Envy and Thuzi was supposed to be endgame but they changed their mind for Nuzi”

Oh boy. I hate this phrase and I dislike anyone that says this phrase and BELIEVE that Envy and Thuzi were supposed to be the canon ships. I keep seeing this phrase from toxic shippers that just can’t accept that there were no signs of those two ships of even happening and I really want to talk about the stupid misinformation of it because if there’s a thing that toxic shippers love doing the most….it’s spread misinformation.

‼️This is not a hate post about ships, I just want to talk abt how silly it is‼️

Let’s start off with an actual fact about the show! Liam wrote the scripts for each episode before episode 2, everything was planned for a reason it did not just happen out of the blue, you can tell by specific posts that Glitch made in (Glitch posting abt Beau a year ago) and some Reddit posts of the Liam qna has a lot of interesting things so I definitely recommend checking that out. So no, Nuzi can’t be fanservice if it was planned before the ship became a popular thing, people just say it’s fanservice bc they hate seeing a crowd of people happy even though they’d be just like Nuzi shippers if N and V held hands instead

I kinda have a lot to say abt Envy so I’ll just talk about Thuzi first. Thuzi (the ship between Thad and Uzi) wouldn’t have happened in canon and it’s very simple to see why it wouldn’t work out, first of all Thad hasn’t been shown ANYWHERE ever since episode 4 and I don’t think he’ll ever been seen again unless they go inside the bunker and although people say that Thad is gone bc of his voice actor being problematic I think he was always supposed to be written out (reminder that the show was written before all of that va drama). Thad didn’t really have a role to be honest he was just kinda there lol which is what wouldn’t work out between him and Uzi since they haven’t talked since episode 2, if Liam wanted Thuzi to be endgame then he would’ve made them interact more, get people invested into the ship before it would become canon but the pilot is the only episode where Thad and Uzi properly interact (I would count episode 2 but there really weren’t any shipping moments between the two unless it’s that scene where Thad pops in but that was just Uzi being all awkward lol). I’d like to add that we have no idea how Thad feels about Uzi, he’s just friendly with everyone so it’s tough to know if Thad even likes Uzi because he hasn’t shown any sign that he has, anyways that’s just my view on Thuzi lol

Envy is a ship filled with miscommunication and I’m not going to deny that. Envy (ship between N and V) is the rival ship of N and Uzi and is the 2nd most popular ship, in my opinion, it’s not a good one at all and this isn’t because I’m a Nuzi shipper, it’s because of the toxicity of it, N and V in their DD forms is very toxic and dysfunctional, V is an okay character but people should acknowledge that V was incredibly mean to N (Ignoring him, physically assaulting him, etc) obviously it’s because of everything that happened in the mansion but that doesn’t justify her actions, N is also pretty mean to V too (insulting her, physically assaulting her, etc) I don’t blame him but it still shouldn’t be justified, couples shouldn’t be mean and hurt each other which is where the miscommunication comes into place. N and V don’t talk about their feelings, they don’t talk about why they’re the way that they are with each other, they just don’t communicate, the only positive interaction I’ve seen them have is only when they are Worker Drones but that’s it, as I said in that reblog of people blaming Uzi and wishing harm on her (btw go check that post out they describe everything SO well!) we don’t know what N and V’s relationship was before they became DD’s, they could’ve been dating, they could’ve just been friends, we have no idea how long they’ve known each other for, all we know is that they were much more nicer to each other than what we see in the entire show. Maybe if they just talked and explained their feelings to each other and why V was ignoring N for who knows how long then maybe they could’ve had a chance of being endgame but that hasn’t happened and might never will if V is dead for good, they still have a chance of talking to each other but it’s too late for them to love each other, N clearly has moved on from his crush on V (it’s been noticeable since episode 3) and has taken interest in Uzi which is the only relationship he has had with anyone that is healthier so it’s no surprise if N and Uzi start dating. People need to realise that V needs to sort herself out without N, she doesn’t need a man to suddenly make her better, she needs to do that on her own terms before talking to N and starting a friendship with him

So now that’s out the way…misinformation! If Toxic shippers had a dollar for every time they spread misinformation around they’d be a billionaire because holy hell do they love spreading false information, I’ve seen so much new fans comment underneath a Nuzi post “oh but I thought they were ____” which is really damn sad. No guys Glitch and Liam never stated which ship was going to be canon they wouldn’t just spoil it and no Nuzi didn’t just come out of nowhere, if you look just close enough, they’ve been hinted at a million times

Thanks for reading this silly thing I made at 3am, I hope it does make sense bc I might just cry if I was explaining gibberish to everyone

[cinnbar-bun]

hi luna :))) *rubs hands together* 💕

can i request some hcs (fluff) of hot pants crushing on reader. like how she is when she has romantic feelings!

(i think you write for pt7 i sprinted to the ask box so delete if you dont anyways bye ilyy)

AAAA Bambi ofc <3 happy late birthday sorry i did this later but yk better late than never!!! Honestly, HP beating me in an alley would totally fix me.

Hot Pants Falling in Love

Rating: SFW

Word Count: ~1.1k

Notes: Mentions of HP's backstory, GN!reader, no spoilers for SBR, some mentions of death/angst (this is HP) but overall pretty fluffy.

Hot Pants is not someone who generally tries to get close to others. She’s on her own mission for salvation, and she’s willing to do it by any means necessary. 

In the beginning of you two meeting, she acts harsh and blunt, as usual. It’s honestly a miracle she didn’t threaten to hang you, but that’s not really a bad thing. 

You two spend a lot of time together during the race and slowly grow closer, something she wasn’t intending or expecting. She was just trying to do her job and find the Corpse Parts. 

Not that she’d admit that- out loud or to her own self. She holds you higher in her head than Johnny or Gyro, but she still views it as just a working relationship. One where you’re both using the other to collect the parts and stop Valentine. 

Nothing more, nothing less, she thinks (deludes) to herself. 

She will straight up refuse to acknowledge these feelings. In no way shape or form is Hot Pants going to admit she’s falling in love with her partner. No way. 

That extra worry she has that’s only reserved for you? Well, of course she’d worry when her trusted partner is injured or hurt. You work so well with her, it’d be a shame for you to be put out of commission. 

The fact she feels the need to share her food with you? Don’t be foolish, how can you race properly when you haven’t eaten much? Now hurry, you need to go to another location. 

The annoyance she feels when Johnny, Gyro, Diego- or frankly anyone else- is taking up your attention and time? You’re her partner, and it’d be annoying to have to deal with you splitting your time or going off to them instead. 

As you can see, Hot Pants is not exactly one to ponder these thoughts too hard. She believes them to be just about business, and that your relationship to her is just a professional one. Nothing else, no other things involved. 

She hasn’t had experiences with love and romance, so she just doesn’t know how to process these feelings. She’ll occasionally have a split second awakening where she’ll think, I do like their presence, then choke it down with a for racing, of course. 

Hot Pants is also not helping her case because despite you being the closest to her and being the one she curries more favor with, she also acts extra stern with you. 

Everyone is seeing those mixed messages where she glares at Gyro for telling you a joke before she barks at you that you need to get your shit together. 

Or when she gives you a part of her sandwich then shoves it in your hand and lectures you on why you planned so poorly. You need to think ahead for these matters, damn it. She won’t be around every time to save your ass. 

Although… she wishes she could be. 

There’s a certain dread that creeps over her when she thinks or looks at you, and it’s entirely self-inflicted. She refuses to acknowledge the notion or why she could be feeling this way towards you, specifically, but she knows that you’re the one she feels this way to. 

It would only be on a random night under the stars where you’re sleeping and she’s on lookout duty, contemplating and ruminating over her life, where she’d be forced to understand the thoughts she’d been denying for so long. 

Hot Pants won’t even make a fuss or put up much of a fight at that time, instead quietly looking into the fire and admitting to herself the truth. 

Ah… I do like them. I like them a lot more than I should. 

She’s obviously guilty over what happened to her brother, but she wonders if she is worthy of having your attention. Does she deserve to be happy with someone after all she’s done? (The answer is yes, of course)

Daily life after that night stays kind of the same. Although, you might catch Hot Pants avoiding your gaze or talking softer to you sometimes. Not always, again, she will try to mask it with her harshness and continue her lectures. 

But now she’s even more determined to make sure you don’t get hurt or, god forbid, die on this race. She will not have you get hurt if it’s the last thing she does. 

She already admits she’s willing to put her life on the line for the sake of the corpse parts and her salvation, but you also get added there, too. She won’t acknowledge this to even herself, but if push came to shove, she’d have no regrets sacrificing her life for you. 

In a way, she’d hope you could be the one to continue the mission for her. She trusts you immensely, and would like to believe that if you got the parts, you could be free and saved. 

All this to say, Hot Pants’s feelings are more subtle and internal. And although she likes to act as if she does not have such feelings or ideas in her head, truthfully, she’s a whole well of them. She thinks too much, feels too much, and loves you too much. 

You’ve complicated her already busy head while also providing with her the only amount of peace and quiet in her mind. You make her feel a bundle of contradictions that she can’t help but act out on. 

She hates you, but she loves you like nothing else. She is worried for you and wants to shield you, but thinks you’re one of the strongest people out there. She wants to get angry and upset at you, but she can’t find it in her to continue that kind of behavior. 

You’d pretty much have to be the one to confess first for her, because no way is she ever going to get over her self-doubts and worries to tell you those feelings. Hot Pants is dedicated, this woman is more likely to go hundreds of years never saying a word about it because in her head, your current relationship is fine enough as it is (your presence is really all she needs) and she’d rather not spoil it with her own desires she deems unworthy to have. 

But one thing is for certain… a Hot Pants in love is a very protective Hot Pants, who would do almost anything for you. You need to just say the word and she’d do it, even if she pretends it is a bother or a waste of time.

[verdantcrimson]

Heaven and Earth / Creation of Heaven and Earth - 7

(Unproofread)

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[After school that same day, in the ES reception room.]

Keito: Now, I’ll summarize the issue at hand for Anzu, who probably doesn’t understand what is happening very well.

Keito: We, AKATSUKI, have been asked to host a long-running show ‘Rumbling Heaven and Earth’, that any history buff worth their salt knows about.

Kuro: By the way, little miss Anzu, have ya ever heard of ‘Rumbling Heaven and Earth’? Ya haven’t, right?

Keito: Quit trying to increase the number of your brethren in ignorance.

Souma: Fufu. You say you have yet to properly sit down and watch it, but you know of its name? Well, it does appear understandably difficult and complex to become invested in.

Souma: I too have beckoned for my younger brother to “come and watch” with me, but he does not spare a glance.

Kuro: Haha, wouldn’t it be more fun for a growin’ boy to move his body?

Keito: Back to what I was saying earlier. We’ve been entrusted with this major role, but a problem has cropped up.

Kuro: The issue is that I’m an idiot.

Keito: I’ve come up with a workaround for that bit, so it’s no longer an issue.

Souma: Hasumi-dono is far too strict in his refusal to retort with the simpler, “You aren’t an idiot,” phrase. ~♪

Keito: You’re being annoying. Also, Kiryu isn’t an idiot, generally speaking, he just can’t study. There’s a difference.

Keito: The problem I was referring to, of course, is the ‘Three Sages.’

Keito: These ‘Three Sages’ are authorities in the field for the countless historians that have supported ‘Rumbling Heaven and Earth’ throughout the years. Without their cooperation, this show just wouldn’t work.

Souma: Umu. We are not academics, but ‘aidoru’, for which reason we so desperately require the assistance of such experts.

Keito: Exactly. However, for better or worse, these exalted scholars were quite unique—

Keito: They had their own set of conditions for us to follow. Though it seemed like they’d be cooperative if we fulfilled them,

Keito: All of these conditions are ill-matched, and in theory, it seems impossible to fulfill all of them.

Keito: Now, we need to figure out what to do. Do you understand now, Anzu?

Kuro: No really, what’re we supposed t’do…? Both Hideyoshi-sensei and Nobunaga-sensei said the same thing, come to think of it. Turns out ‘Rumbling Heaven and Earth’ is a total landmine of a job after all.

Kuro: We’re just dumbasses that jumped for joy, and fell right into a trap.

Souma: Now Kiryu-dono, let us try and think of this the other way around. I believe that it may be precisely because we are without a proven record of accomplishments unlike the ‘beterans’ of our agency, that the responsibility of handling such a precarious case has been entrusted to us young people.

Keito: I agree with Kanzaki’s view on this.

Kuro: Why’re you two just freakishly in sync these days!? You ‘good at studyin’’ folks are conspirin’ together, aren’tcha? Little miss, you’re on my side though, right? Won’t ya come to the ‘can’t study for shit’ side…?

Keito: Don’t act like a baby to gain Anzu’s sympathy, Kiryu… But seriously, what side would you take, Anzu? I’ve always thought that you were sincere, and a hard worker, so your grades must be good, right?

Souma: Hmm. Anzu-dono is currently enrolled in the ‘purodyuusu’ course, so I cannot say for certain, however, the year prior, her grades were of a generally average nature. They were neither good nor bad.

Kuro: If ya studied super hard and still got an average grade, that must mean you must’ve been a pretty terrible student in the past.

Keito: Don’t try to recruit fellow bad students. Quit trying to run from reality, Kiryu. It’d be best if you tried to be reborn as a wiser version of yourself.

Kuro: Easy for you to say, but y’know… I can’t change that fast. I mean, I worked real hard to finally be reborn at the level I am right now.

Keito: Yes. I acknowledge your hard work.

Keito: Effort will never betray a person. People are only ever betrayed by people.

Souma: Those are meaningful words. Unfailingly, problems can be attributed to people.

Keito: That applies to our current predicament as well. What should we do, Anzu?

Keito: I would like to hear your opinion.

Kuro: Careful now, little miss. If ya answer with somethin’ strange, Hasumi’s gonna blow his lid.

Keito: Stop fooling around. If Anzu had been even a little less self-assertive of a person, she would’ve shriveled up by now.

Keito: —Hm, I see. Decide on what our priorities are, huh?

Keito: It’s better to be selective, and decide on what you want to accomplish, rather than try to accomplish everything and risk ending up with nothing.

Keito: That sounds fair. Nothing good comes from being greedy.

Keito: And naturally, what’s most important to us is the progress of AKATSUKI.

Kuro: As an idol, ya should’ve answered with somethin’ more like “the smiles of our fans.”

Keito: If we’re very successful and sparkle brightly, our fans will be pleased and smile anyways, right?

Keito: We would like to bolster our reputation by hosting ‘Rumbling Heaven and Earth.’ However, in order for the show to be a success, we need the cooperation of the ‘Three Sages.’

Keito: However, in order to get them to cooperate with us, we have to meet their conditions—

Keito: …I’m just repeating myself. What I’m trying to say is that the order of priorities is (1) AKATSUKI’s progression, (2) Getting ‘Rumbling Heaven and Earth’ approved, and (3) the feelings of the ‘Three Sages.

Keito: In the most extreme case, even if we are unable to achieve (2) or (3), accomplishing just (1) would be fine.

Keito: … Hm? What is it, Anzu?

Keito: If you have something to add, don’t be afraid to say it. That is why I called you here, after all.

Keito: I see… That sounds drastic, but I guess it’s technically possible.

Keito: It’s not like we’d be punished for trying. Oi Kiryu, Kanzaki—

Keito: Let’s prepare whatever documents and materials we’ll need by tomorrow.

Keito: As per Anzu’s suggestion, we’ll make a trial version of ‘Rumbling Heaven and Earth’ on our own.

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[rahuratna]

WAIT I ACCIDENTALLY PRESSED SUBMIT WKDNNDKSKKD.

My bad, I don’t know what to do… 😭 😭

Uhh, I’ll just continue you off here… (I’m so sorry).

Ahem. Mahito. My sworn enemy. Murderer of the love of my life. I will never ever forgive— but, oh gosh, why is his voice so… AHEM. I got distracted.

Mahito said this one thing that piqued my interest. Don’t remember the exact words but it was something along the lines of: “I’m grateful to you.” So interesting. We talked a lot about how gratitude was one of Nanami’s motivations, how it gave him purpose. And it came from the innocent/weak and his comrades. But this is coming from a curse 😬

I can’t really give an explanation as to why… because his interaction with Nanami led him to discovering domain expansion? Is that it?? I guess Mahito growing stronger is something he gets off of, the thrill of it and also identity shenanigans, but I do not spend time pondering over my mortal enemies 😁 (Just kidding… here I am… intrigued by Mahito and his stupidly cute voice… I still hate him… I can’t help but wonder… ugh)

The reason I find this so interesting is how at the end, Mahito is stronger than Nanami. When Mahito ends Nanami, I doubt that he remembers or acknowledges any of the gratitude back then. Specifically because he said to Yuji, “I’ll probably forget you in the future too.” Gratitude to Mahito is meaningless. I think that also just shows how different curses are from humans. Gratitude plays such a big part for a lot of human happiness. But not for curses.

I found Mahito’s philosophy very interesting, the way that he saw everything as pointless which led to him doing whatever he wanted to do. Which is killing people (my beloved 😭) and propelling the endless cycle of war between curses and humans. It reminds me of nihilism sorta kinda maybe IDK. Again, I just haven’t given it much thought because he’s Mahito…

Ah, you know what. This reminds me of Attack on Titan (🥸). Marleyans vs. Eldians. Each side is fighting for survival, so they can have their own world. They wanted the same things, have their own peaceful world, but it just so happened that they were on opposing sides with a long history of violence and racism. Same thing with curses and humans. They both want to occupy the world, live their own lives, but they just can’t coexist. Mahito doesn’t see any side as right or wrong. His choices and decisions are based on impulse and desire. The lack of empathy is what makes him realllly different from Eren but I think the vision is very similar. They both stick to one side and fight for it because that’s the side they were born into. It’s so cool how there are overlapping themes of endless cycles. Like either with humanity against curses or a divided humanity against itself.

In conclusion, I feel very frustrated, confused, mad, and intrigued about Mahito. UGH. How dare he have an amazing VA and also cause so much pain and suffering. UNFAIR. CRUEL. I dislike him but I don’t. Would I have disliked him more if I only read the manga and he never had a voice? 😐😑😐

(Side note, I also realized ep 13 was when Nanami actually actually acknowledged Yuji as a sorcerer. Now I have to draw more Papamin. Sigh. I swear, everytime the topic of Nanami is brought up, it evokes a physically sigh from me.)

Sighing to sign off,

courtney 💜💜

Hi @courtneedsleep ! I am the world's biggest procrastinator, both in the way you mentioned and with regards to work I don't like/have little interest in. When it comes to series, absolutely! I put things off when I know I will enjoy them. I have a whole list of shows (anime included) that I know are brilliant and have been putting off for some time now, all because I know I will love them and want to savour them properly!

So, essentially, I don't know when I will end up watching Paranoia Agent, Odd Taxi or From the New World, but I know I'll love them 🤭

I've actually been re-watching some of season 1 myself (ah, simpler times) and Mahito is genuinely such an excellent character (as much as I want to do unspeakably horrible things to him).

Mahito initially came across, to me, as something of a contradiction. He was evidently born from human folly, and shows great delight in manipulating and tormenting humans, as he does with Junpei. You could almost say that he uses humans in the same way that sorcerers use cursed tools. That's what they are to him. Tools to be used to further the ends of cursed spirits.

This is where Mahito struck me as being truly dangerous: his fight with Nanami. He comes across (as Nanami comments) as fickle, sadistic, immature, barely aware of the impact of his own actions and with the air of a child playing with and destroying their toys. What is doubly terrifying is the power that he possesses, leaving others at the mercy of his whim.

Mahito's power is also terrifying and, from my initial perspective, almost inappropriate for a cursed spirit like him. He is able to accurately perceive the soul, in spite of being an 'immature' spirit, and downright psychopathic (by human standards). His power, like you said, is heavily instinctual and relies on his reading of a moment, emotions or the way a person responds to things.

The moment when he 'thanks' Nanami also stands out to me. It's almost like a child thanking their parent for a new plaything, something that might increase their status or bargaining power on the playground. Naturally, the child won't remember that act of gratitude for long, over the pleasure that their possession brings, or the manner in which they use it. That's going by the standard of regular children, of course, and Mahito is anything but regular, let alone human.

When Mahito eventually kills Nanami, he feels nothing of normal human gratitude. As far as he is concerned, Nanami has played his part, has helped him achieve more power, and can now be disposed of like all of the other human 'tools' as a means of furthering the cause of cursed spirits.

Yes. Pretty callous and inhumane overall. As expected. But then, Mahito subverted my expectations. As the series progressed, I began to see what you described; the attachment to his comrades, declaring a clear purpose for cursed spirits on earth, bringing about the return of Sukuna, and creating a new reality beneficial to cursed spirits overall. Very similar to the Marleyans and Eldians, this shows two species that are determined to carve a place for themselves in the world, to declare their right to exist, but also not able to tolerate the existence of each other.

Mahito suddenly displayed characteristics that were so much more human. I could no longer think of him as 'just another capricious curse' with no real understanding of the havoc he caused. His attachments to his own comrades spoke very clearly of that fact that he understood just how sadistic and terrible his actions were, they were just directed at humans, and so, he simply didn't care.

He was able to be so carefree not because he was totally unhinged, but because he saw humans the way humans saw curses. If we think of it from that perspective, he killed Nanami, just as Nanami exorcised cursed spirits.

Is there therefore a difference between him and Nanami, as viewed from either side? Fundamentally, yes. Nanami is shown to offer comfort and compassion to transformed humans, even as he has to take their lives. He understands all too well the weight of taking lives; Mahito does not.

This is all too clear when he prioritizes taking out Nobara, someone who's technique is a direct threat to him. Mahito suddenly learns what mortal peril feels like, what it means to be on the receiving end. Unlike Nanami, who truly did expect to meet his death as a sorcerer, and fully understood the risks, Mahito was still a child playing in an adult world, albeit, a horrendously powerful and dangerous child.

It's also extremely clear later (I won't spoil things, because I'm not exactly certain where in the show you are) that he is terrified of Yuuji's single-minded pursuit of him and desire to eradicate what he represents. Mahito does learn the true meaning of fear, he does come to understand the weight of lives, he does come to understand his own smallness on the scale of things. As philosophical as he came across, he applied those concepts very narrowly, and in ways that were heavily prejudiced by his own conception as a cursed spirit.

Mahito is such a great character, a truly adaptable and ever-evolving antagonist, and he's just delectably detestable, isn't he?

(Side note: It WAS the first time Nanami acknowledged him as a sorcerer! Proud Nanamin. 😭 I love that he's so caring and compassionate to Yuuji without ever overstepping the bounds of what he believes is true. He won't give praise where it's not deserved. He's not a sentimental man given to overt displays of affection. He's blunt to a fault. Which makes the occasions where he DOES acknowledge the students so much more meaningful and precious).

[azulsluver]

Twisted Tales In The Dark

Ending Of A Beginning        Halloween Event

tw: mentions of violence and gore

A monitor loudly beeps within every two seconds, being the only sound in the room with you. You can feel your chest breath in and out of oxygen, the bottom part of your face feels warm with each breath. There’s movement by your side, hands caressing your arms and hands, they’re desperate.

Your vision was nothing but a black void, soon you regain the sight of colors and shapes. The mind starts to work inside of your body, blood flowing through your veins to twitch your weakened limbs. You’ve never felt more alive. The ears haven’t yet start to work, you can feel things around you, were you more sensitive to the touch? The hands on you have left by now, leaving you to feel the soft yet stiff mattress you were on. Fingers intertwined with the thin blanket that covers you, finding comfort in the material as you try to regain more control.

There’s a soft whisper, something is placed by your heart than fingers on your neck. You swallow the sweetened air and flutter your eyes open, cringing at the brightness of light shining down at you. Finally seeing the world around you, wondering where you are next. But you aren’t in some scary situation, there’s no people who aren’t familiar to you. Blinking more than once when you’re surrounded by others who hug and hold your hands.

As if your eyes deceived you, just what was going on? Your eyes gazed from one person to the other, their faces morph from a swirly void to features you didn’t think you would see again. Their touches are warm and words are loud. You didn’t mind they were loud, you would rather have them screaming at the top of their lungs seeing you rather go through— what happened?

“You’re alive holy shit, I thought you died out on us! That fall was horrible, the doctor said you won’t be able to walk until your knee heals properly.”

“[Name]!! Y-you’re okay!! God, don’t do that ever again, I was convinced you were a goner!”

“Guys don’t overwhelm them, they just woke up. Give them some space would you? Jeez, I’m glad you’re well [Name].”

With little surrounding you, only one person who whines and clings to your side stays to cry. Others try their best to pry her off. You stare shocked at their faces, wishing somehow you can pinch yourself to see if you are in the afterlife. Or did you make it. Your eyes swell with tears, chest heaving from relief as you cry. Weak limbs wrapping around your friend who cries along with you, the two of your sobs being the loudest thing in the room.

•

Dragged and pushed around in a wheel chair, you constantly have a friends hand over yours. Squeezing it for reinsurance, you’re afraid if you didn’t you might wake up from this dream. Your mind is still frazzled, sensitive as you are from everything around you. It felt unreal knowing you’re back home, there’s just something bothering you during the meantime.

A part of your brain acknowledges the events you’ve been through, it’s about the next day since Halloween has passed. An eternity of abuse and violence stayed in the far back of your mind. The brain refuses to go into further detail of what happened, the memory of your body being mauled, people slaughtered ruthlessly, and the deaths caused by your own hands. Guilt lies deep down into your system, you can try to bury them but it will always find a way back to you.

“They’ll be fine, as long as they take these medications every six hours a day things will run smoothly. For some odd reason the brain was fractured mentally, as if some traumatic events took place. Are you sure they just fell?”

A doctor holds a pen and board in hand, your focused on the way he’s tapping the pen on the board. Zoning and daydreaming.

“I’m positive. My friends were experimenting on this book we found, we were just messing around with it until some bright light blinded everyone. [Name] panicked and started to run hysterically in the woods, that’s when we later found them a couple of hours later deep down a steep hill. I’m certain that’s all that has happened, the book however…”

You squeeze hard on the hand, heart spiking in panic at the mention of the book. You were sure the look on your face gave it away. 

You weren’t supposed to be leaving the hospital so soon, but you didn’t feel like staying for another week would heal your mind mentally. You really needed to do something first, starting off with that book and whereabouts. They let you off so easily, you’re getting suspicious.

“What did you guys do with the book?”

“Hm? You mean the one Michael stole?”

Nodding, she hums in thought.

“Micheal has it, I’m not sure where but do you want me to ask him to give it to you? He says ever since the incident of your accident he’s been getting weird vibes from it.”

Staring at the various of cars parked in the lot you blink once, a shadowed figure slipping from your sight. “Yea. I would like that.”

Patina, ah, that was her name. Her face displayed into a cherry woman with red hair and the kindest of yellow eyes. You’re not sure why you couldn’t remember her for a second, the aftershock of meeting everyone and the past has made you block them off entirely. You couldn’t handle another death caused by yourself. Patina would idly chat with you as you’re seated in the car, she speaks of your parents who are away in the state but have heard about the accident. You’re glad they care. Placing an arm by the window, you stare lazily in the distance. Peace, you should enjoy it while you can.

“Do you need some help making anything before I leave to get the book? Are you able to eat solids?” You laugh, rolling your head back to meet a smiling friend who shines brightly at your reaction.

“It’s fine, Patina. I’ll just eat whatever’s in the fridge. I want that book here as soon as possible however.” She sighs before patting your shoulder.

Being left to your own devices again, you can almost cry when stepping foot into your apartment, well, not really. The wheels were fun to push around, going past the kitchen and living room to check the bedroom. You wanted to rest for a bit even when you feel jumpy after Patina left. The book clouds your thoughts, laying in bed and staring at the ceiling. You would bring your hands up to your face, if you looked harder maybe you’ll see the stains underneath your nails.

Sleep was hard to come by, making you face the left and right wall. You became uncomfortable with each breath and flicker of your eyes, wishing Patina would call you sooner. Calling? You lost your phone during the fall, you haven’t received your phone but luckily you had a landline. The idea of calling Patina even after she left thirty minutes ago has you sitting up, throwing the blanket off you to stand.

Feet planted on the ground, you sway and fall, hands reflexively grabbing onto something to hold you up. Your knees are shaking as you open your eyes, looking down at your feet as they move inch by inch on its own. You test your faith by putting weight down, standing up straight.

Was it a miracle? Lifting a leg and settling it down, the other as well, you don’t feel anything else but a faint strain by the ankle. It was impossible, you’re not in the stories anymore—

Your eyes land on your jewelry box. You haven’t notice anything out of the ordinary, that was the problem, you didn’t notice or cared to check. Was your room always this clean since you left for Halloween? The fluffed out pillows. Clothes not in sight, possibly in the drawers and closet. You move with confidence, hand reaching out to check your desk for any odds. There’s paperwork on the left side, it’s neatly stacked in a pile and organized by last names and color. The first stack catches your attention, you don’t remember having any sort of contract paper. With expert writing, there’s a list of conditions including along the lines of life and death. The more you read the long dress starts to sink in. At the bottom lays an empty space for a signature, it jeers at you.

You crumble up the paper in your hand, throwing it in the middle of your bed in a fit of anger. Your breaths are shallow again, fingers entangled in your hair as you try to calm yourself. It was a mistake. Maybe, just maybe you hit your head too hard you can’t even remember what happened before leaving the house. Nothing strange but it’s unsettling, you’ll be fine! Laughing to yourself, you decided to do a deep check of things, starting off with your desk drawers. You pull at the handle, met with a gust of perfume that clogs your nostrils. Holding in your breath as you fan the air, smelling of something of floral and strong. The middle part of your drawer is filled with paper, all written with words you can’t even understand. Since when did you had a secret stash of admirers?

Confused, your hands pull at every drawer there was. The side drawers of your desk: coins and gemstones you recognized from somewhere. The jewelry box: large rings and necklaces, flattered to think it was made out of pure gold and diamonds! Frantically throwing your closet open, you gasp at the sight of thorned vines covering your clothes. A sharp margarine has you clutching your head, holding onto the closet to steady yourself. Craning your neck back up, eyes blown wide by seeing nothing, no thorns, weeds, just a closet.

Tripping over yourself, you reach for the landline just a couple of feet up by the hallway. Fingers desperately tapping on the numbers of what you can remember.

“Patina! The book! WHERE IS IT?!” Sweat forms under your neck, a scowl on your face as you wait for an answer.

“Whoa, [Name]? I’m with Micheal at the moment, he can’t find it anywhere.”

“What?? You said he had it with him.” This wasn’t good, you bring your nails up to your face, teeth nibbling in anxiety. 

“I did! But we can’t seem to find in anywhere, it’s as if it disappeared.” You stay silent.

You haven’t checked the whole apartment.

“[Name?]” 

Dropping the phone, you turn around to face the kitchen counter; there’s roses in a vase and a plate with a sliced piece of cake. Patina calls out for you again, the line soon turns off with a click as you stand by the counter. With your mouth agape you swallow nothing, the strawberry cake has a scent so tempting, it’s fresh. Should you explore more of your own apartment, the thought makes your skin rattle in your body. You would rather turn into an empty husk, refusing to believe they found a way back into the world where you call home. 

A loud meow has you jolting from your skin, snapping your head to the couch's back faces you. Flickers of blue similar to fire peaks up, a feline all too familiar and much larger.

“Grim?” He meows at you again, jumping over the couch with a book in his mouth. 

Scooting yourself towards him, he leaves the book in your hands, pawing at your pants while at it. Your hands flip through the pages, finding the illustrations just as it was. The spell at the very end was gone, a blank page. You throw the book in the sink, searching through a cabinet for a lighter. With your heart beating with adrenaline you’ve only felt during the chases, thumb flickering the tip to light up. Grim jumps on the counter, licking his paw as he watches you shake.

The lighter was dipped to the edge of the book, flames licking up the paper until your doorbell wrung. Dropping the book and lighter in the sink, you run to the door, not bothering to check the peephole. It must be Patina and Micheal!

But it wasn’t. Except it was this strange man wearing a coat and mask, the mask covering the top of his eyes, resembling of a birds beak. His fancy top hat would’ve fooled you, Halloween isn’t over? Shaken by the golden hues that are blinking and glowing, you close the door halfway but enough to speak loudly.

“Can I help you?”

“Indeed you can.” He tips his hat, bowing slightly in greeting. “Dear, you have something that doesn’t belong to you. This something is very precious associating with my friend who informed me of a robbery.”

Sweat trickled down your forehead. You had no part in the taking of the book, but you still felt guilty. 

“Do...You know how to help me get rid of it?” He blinks. A smile showing too much teeth for your comfort. “Of course. Because I’m so kind, I’ll gladly let you off the hook for breaking damaged property.”

Grim sneaks in between your legs, back arched as he hisses at the sight of the masked man. Your mind screams at you to do something, another choice of risking your life once again. But you didn’t want to relive that nightmare, it’s enough to convince you to put him on hold as you swiftly leave to fetch the book. Not minding Grim’s mewls to stop you from doing so.

Handing the book back, the masked man happily flips through the pages. He’s skimming through the very end of the book, his smile dropping as it comes to a stop.

The book indulges in flames, the crisp of whatever is left lingers in the air. The masked man coughs to gain your attention, his expression unreadable. Tilting his head downwards, he regains a smile back at you.

“There. No more spooky stories. Reality is much more better, I wish you the best of luck. [Name].” Your eyebrows creased, words stuck in your throat as he walks down the hallway.

You never told him your name. 

Closing the door, you slide down to the floor spent. Grim pushes his way to your lap, curling up and resting. How are your friends gonna react to you having a fire-eared cat monster? The whole place was deafening, silence to the point you can hear your own heart beat.

When you lift up your head you can hear a whisper right next to you.

[kpopimaginings]

Stray Kids Reaction (Maknae Line) - Finding you after/during an attempt

TRIGGER WARNING: Do not read any further if you may be triggered by stories about suicide, mental health, depression, anxiety. (If there are any TW tags that you have blocked and I haven’t used, tell me! I will add them)

I would also like to make it clear that in none of scenarios is what happens actually because of the members. It is written from their perspectives where they may blame themselves, but that is not how depression normally works.

Hyung line: Part 1 - Part 2

Maknae line: Part 1 - Part 2

There will be a part two (which could also stand alone) of the super fluff that happens when he can properly talk to you/take care of you after.

Han

Both of you had your own mental health battles going on but were very mindful of each other. You were always making an effort to check-in when you were apart. Even if you missed each other's calls, you would text or call back as soon as possible. Particularly with you knowing Han's anxieties, you didn't like to leave him waiting too long.

With both of you having your own lives, you quickly realised the best way to avoid added stress was to have a set time to check in with one another. That's why it surprised Han so much when you didn't answer his call.

"Hey, angel, it's your boyfriend," he said to your voice mail, "Just let me know you're good when you get a second."

After hanging up he couldn't help but constantly check his phone, waiting for a call back, a text, anything.

When there had been no contact after about 5 minutes, he called again. The longer the dial tone sounded the more anxious he became. With the phone still pressed to his ear he awkwardly pulled his shoes on with one hand before rushing out.

He was grateful your apartment was so close as he continued to call, hanging up and redialling every time your voicemail began. Until one time when the dial tone cut quicker than normal. He called out your name before realising there was no sound. Pausing briefly, he looked at the screen. You had terminated the call. You were with your phone but ignoring him.

The anxious adrenaline kicked up a gear as he gave up calling and all but sprinted the rest of the way to your building, cursing under his breath. He thanked his brain for remembering the entry code despite the panic as he bypassed the lift to dash up the stairs.

Once again, the numbers were pressed on autopilot as he reached your door, swinging it open with no thoughts of closing it. His heart felt like it would burst through his chest as he ran to your bathroom entering immediately to find you struggling with the childproof cap on a bottle of pills.

Quickly noticing the bottle of vodka you had on the sink beside you he knew his panic was justified. Darting forward he grabbed for the pills in your hands.

"No!" you shouted, fighting for them. "No! Let go."

This was a battle you were both determined to win. In the midst of the struggle, you somehow got the lid off, causing your arm to jolt back knocking the alcohol bottle off the sink. Pills clattered to the floor amid the vodka and broken glass. You sunk to your knees scrambling to gather the tablets up. Your breaths were laboured and frantic, your brain unable to register the pain from the cuts the shattered glass inflicted on your hands and knees.

Han continued to call your name, desperate to break through whatever had taken a hold of you. There was no acknowledgement from you from you as you picked up glass alongside the medication and raising your hand to your mouth.

Realising what was happening Han smacked your hand causing you to drop them. Rushing behind you, he grabbed your wrists pinning them to your chest and lifting you to drag you out of the room. You fought against his grip as you cried and shouted.

"What are you doing?" you screamed. "Put me down! Just leave me alone."

Once you were out in the hallway, safe from all the glass, he sat on the floor and wrapped himself around you to stop you getting away. As you slowly start to calm down, your cries becoming quiet sobs, Han felt it was safe enough to remove one of his arms from around you to reach for his phone and call an abulance.

As Han spoke to the operator, you finally stilled now drained of energy. You just sat in a haze for a moment, not focussing on anything around you, sight or sound. When your boyfriend had finished his call and felt safe to let go of you, he moved into your field of vision and started to tap your leg in an unpredictable pattern to ground you.

You gradually became more aware of your surroundings and the first thing you noticed was the bloodstains on your boyfriend.

"Babe, what happened?" you asked, concerned.

Han simply stared at you, eyes wide and mouth agape.

"Are you bleeding?" As you reached out to him, you started to feel the pain from the cuts on your hands.

You looked down at your open palms, realisation hitting you as you thought over what had happened. Tears began to fill your eyes again.

"I'm so sorry," you managed to tell Han.

He simply sat next to you and cradled you in his arms.

"I just can't do this anymore," you sobbed as he held you close.

Han was fighting back his own tears now. What more could he possibly do for you? He'd done everything he could think of to help you and be there for you, but now what? You were giving up?

Felix

Felix knew you'd been feeling a bit down lately so when you disappeared upstairs mumbling about a bath he'd brushed it off as you needing some 'me time' and left you to it. He simply laid down on the sofa and pulled his phone out calling Hyunjin. The sound of the older boy answering in English made him smile.

"I thought you had plans tonight Lixie. Is everything all right?" Hyunjin asked.

"Yeah, it's movie night, but Y/n's in the bath and hyung is out buying snacks," Felix explained.

The pair of them continued to chat about nothing in particular when there was a crash from upstairs.

"Babe?" Felix called up. "You good?"

"I dropped my candle," you shouted back.

"Ah, ok, be careful," he replied, knowing from the sound it was a candle in a glass container.

He apologised to Hyunjin for the interruption before they started conversing again. A few minutes into their chat there was a thud from upstairs.

Felix apologised once again before moving the phone away and shouting up to you. "Y/n, everything ok?"

When there was no answer, he put the phone back to his ear. "I'm just heading upstairs to make sure they're ok," he told hyunjin.

"How clumsy can one person be?" the older boy joked.

Felix just laughed as he ran up the stairs calling your name a couple of times before he reached the bathroom door. He knocked tentatively.

"Babe? Are you ok?" he asked with no answer.

Pushing open the door, he was greeted by a red puddle creeping towards him from your unconscious form.

A shard of glass from the shattered candle pot still laid in your hand. A destressed whimper fell from Felix's lips prompting hyunjin to speak again asking what was happening. In his panic, Felix's brain defaulted to its native language speaking in panicked Austrailian.

Hyunjin was doing his best and picked up the odd word. He managed to catch your name and a few mentions of blood before the call was ended. Alarmed now, Hyunjin immediately called Bang Chan and relayed everything that had happened on the phone. Dropping everything Chan rushed back home, flinging the door open and running up the stairs.

He stopped for a moment in the bathroom doorway taken aback by the sheer amount of blood around you before snapping out of it. You and Felix needed him to be strong right now. Noticing that he was trying to talk to someone on the phone, Bang Chan took it away from Felix. The operator on the other end seemed to be struggling to understand the fractured Konglish that Felix was getting out between sobs. Once the important information had been passed on, Chan left the phone on speaker and grabbed the two nearest towels throwing one to Felix as he crouched down.

Taking the arm closest to him Chan gently wrapped the towel around your wounds, holding tight to keep pressure on them. Feeling how limp your arm was, Chan properly looked at you seeing how sickeningly pale your face was. He felt his stomach drop with dread, panic starting to overtake him. That was until he looked up and saw Felix. He was still sat staring at you, his tears now falling silently. He must have taken the shard of glass from you as his hand was now bleeding.

"Lix," said Chan gently, "The towel. Wrap it around her arm and hold it like this."

Robotically, Felix did as his hyung instructed wrapping the towel around your injury before placing your arm back down and leaning against it.

"She'll be ok, Lixie," Bang Chan tried to reassure your broken boyfriend. "We called the ambulance nice and quick, yeah?"

Felix didn't respond, just continued to stare at you laid out on the floor.

"What about you?" Chan continued. "Are you ok? I saw a cut on your hand. Lix? Felix?"

Still Felix didn't respond. It seemed to Chan that he had completely shut down but his thoughts were a mess of worries.

How could all this happen while he was just downstairs? What if he had gone upstairs after the first crash? Why hadn't he realised you were feeling this low? Was he that bad of a boyfriend that you couldn't turn to him? Would he ever get the chance to make it up to you?

Seungmin

Seungmin had been super busy with Stray Kids' come back so he hadn't been able to see you for a few days. Because of this he had decided to surprise you this evening. He approached your door excited to see the look on your face when you realised he had come to see you. Your smile was one of his favourite things. He always foud you beautiful but when you smiled, you were perfection.

Knocking on your door, he stood for a moment, rocking back and forth between his heels and the balls of his feet. When you didn't answer he reached for your spare key. It wouldn't be the first time you'd had your headphones on and not heard him at the door. He stepped over the threshold closing the door and removing his shoes before wandering the house to find you.

It surprised him to find you asleep in bed. Normally, just the sound of someone approaching the door would wake you. Seungmin paused for a moment, a soft smile on his face. You must have been so tired. He felt bad waking you, but he knew you would want to see him as much as he wanted to see you. He walked closer and nudged your shoulder.

"Jagiya," he spoke. "It's your Seungminnie."

When you didn't stir, he took both your shoulders and shook you slightly. Still nothing.

"Y/n?" he said, more loudly now.

Why weren't you waking? It was then that Seungmin noticed the empty cup and sleeping pill bottle on your bedside table. But it wasn't that late in the evening, and you wouldn't normally take one unless you'd been struggling for a while to get to sleep. Plus, you're alarm was normally still enough to wake you, so surely Seungmin shaking you should get some sort of reaction.

Out of curiosity he picked up the bottle and noticed it was empty. Before the panic could properly set in, he called Bang Chan for some rational advice.

"Hey Min," came Chan's usual upbeat tone.

"Hyung?" Seungmin's shaky tone contradicted that of the leaders. "Um, I'm not sure how much I should be panicking right now."

"Why are we panicking? Are you alright?" Chan's voice had changed now, but it was still as calm as he could make it.

"Well, I'm at Y/n's place and I can't wake them up and their sleeping pills have all gone?"

"Okay, do they feel cold?"

"No... No, why would they feel cold?" Seungmin challenged.

"And they're still breathing?"

"Yes, they're breathing, why wouldn't they be breathing?"

"Okay, that's good" Chan reassured the younger. "Are the pills prescription? Can you tell when they got them?"

There was a long pause on the other end of the line.

"Seungmin? Hey?"

"Yesterday..." Seungmin finally managed to answer, his voice barley audible.

"Right." Chan asserted doing his best to remain calm. "You need to call an ambulance, when they answer..."

"Ambulance?!" Seungmin interrupted begining to really panic now.

"Yes. You need to tell them what you just told me." Chan paused, now noticing the sound of Seungmin's panicked breathing as he incoherently began trying to say something.

"Felix!" Chan called out to the boy closest to him. "Call an ambulance to Y/n's house, now please!"

A confused and highly concerned Felix immediately pulled out his phone and followed Chan's instructions. 

"Seungmin, Y/n needs you to focus. Tell me the name of the pill," Chan pleaded as he pulled on his jacket and shoes. "Just spell it out if you need to."

The mention of your name grabbed Seungmin's attention enough for him to respond, spelling out the word on the label. Chan passed on the relevant information to Felix before rushing out.

"Min, stay on the line with me, yeah? I'm on my way, Felix is sorting the ambulance. Y/n will be ok, we are going to get them help."

Chan started running to yours, noticing that Seungmin wasn't responding. "You still with me?" he asked.

Seungmin hummed, but still wasn't responding with words.

Luckily, your place wasn't far from the dorms and Seungmin had put the spare key back before closing the door behind him. Chan easily got in, making sure to leave the door ajar for the paramedics who weren't far behind him.

Chan barely had time to pull Seungmin into a hug when the heard the sound of the emergency responders shouting as they entered. Still holding his dongsaeng, Bang Chan called back leading them straight to you. As paramedics began to check you over, Chan pulled away taking Seungmin's face in his hands and wiping his tears away with his thumbs.

"Help's here, see?"

"But why couldn't I help?" the younger choked out. "I haven't been here in days and maybe if I was..."

Seungmin couldn't finish his sentence as he broke down in despair burying his face in his hyungs should once more.

"Why am I so useless?"

IN

It was a day just like any other for Jeongin. He'd stayed behind a little late to work on some lyrics with Chan, so it was late evening by the time he returned to the house. As he walked in, he saw Kkami's lead missing from its spot by the door meaning Hyunjin must be out for a walk.

"Yeobo? You home?"

No answer. He smiled to himself; you'd been down lately but had been talking about catching up with the gal pals, so he assumed you were hitting the town. Realising he had the place to himself for a bit he smiled to himself. It was rare for him to have time alone, so he was going to make the most of it.

Heading to the kitchen to grab a snack, he was surprised to see dirty dishes in the sink. You'd normally berate him and Hyunjin for leaving washing up. He decided to earn some brownie points so he cleaned up a little. Once he was done, he figured he deserved a treat before you came back. He'd recently been gifted a new game at a fansign and had left it upstairs in your guys bedroom so he headed up to retrieve it.

As he reached the top of the stairs Jeongin smiled to himself again. You'd left the light on in the bedroom, yet another thing he always got told off for.

"Y/N you're in for it when you get back," he thought to himself.

He pulled down the door handle and pushed but was utterly confused when it didn't open.

He frowned slightly. There wasn't a lock on the bedroom door or anything. What was happening?

Bracing himself a little he turned the handle again and shoved with his shoulder. The door suddenly budged open just a little, not enough for him to squeeze through but maybe he could see what was causing the obstruction?

As Jeongin looked down it was as if the floor beneath him had suddenly vanished.

"What...? Y/N?!"

Before he could fully process what he was seeing, he slammed into the door once more, giving himself just enough space to get through to you. Through watery eyes Jeongin started trying to undo the rope around your neck. His hands were shaking so much he couldn't find purchase on the rope to even begin to get it off you. In a blind panic all he could think of doing was getting the rope off the doorknob.

With the adrenaline running through his body Jeongin felt no pain as he repeatedly bashed his fist again the handle. He didn't feel it when his bones broke; barley registered when the handle finally came free, tearing into his hand. In fact he only realised he'd hurt himself when he saw his blood on your skin. He panicked even more before understanding that it came from him not you as he hurriedly removed the now loose rope from around your neck.

In a desperate attempt he shook your shoulder calling out your name, trying to get you to wake up. It didn't take long for him to realise that you weren't there anymore. Despite shaking with worry and with one busted up hand, he somehow managed to get his phone out of his pocket and call 112.

"112, what is the nature of your emergency?"

"Please help... they're not, they're not... I don't know... I don't know what to do, please help," Jeongin could barley form the words he needed to say in his head, how could he tell this person what was going on?

"Sir, are you okay? Is the patient breathing?"

"No, no they're not breathing! Please..."

"Okay I'm going to talk you through CPR just do as I say. Can you tell me the address of the emergency?"

Jeongin doesn't know how he manages to talk in between his sobs but manages to relay your address before the operator begins talking him through CPR.

He can tell he's not doing a good job of following the operator's instructions. He was trying as hard as he could, but he couldn't fully compress your chest, the blood from his cut was making his hands slippery and his body kept stopping him from putting his weight onto his broken bones. He was so focused on trying to help you that he didn't even realise Hyunjin had returned home until he spoke.

"Move I'll do it," Hyunjin said, shoving Jeongin out of the way.

Hyunjin felt bad at how harsh he sounded but he didn't have time to try and console his dongseng, not when he came home to find one of his best friends lying motionless on the floor. Jeongin looked on as Hyunjin began giving you CPR. His mind was spiralling at a loss of how to help, he had to do something. He just didn't know what.

"Let me..." Jeongin began as he reached for you.

"Back off. You're in no state to help right now," Hyunin snapped.

Jeongin whimpered before whispering, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry hyung, I'm sorry Y/n."

Jeongin couldn't pull his eyes away from you as he curled into himself. Struggling to breath now all he could do was sit there and watch as someone else tried to help you.

"I'm sorry."

NAVIGATION |  STRAY KIDS MASTERLIST