#i think its the jawline and mustache

[johnbleepingzoidberg]

UNTITLED EVIL LUIGI AU COMIC THING | Page 4 of (???)

WEEGEE FINALLY MAKES AN APPEARANCE

.....in a flashback though

---

hmmmmmm i have mixed feelings about the coloring on this one. i wasn’t sure how to combine the cheery bright pink-ness of the cafe with the darkness of bowser’s castle. but the more i worked on it the more ok i felt about it i guess? the black text boxes helped with the overall mood i think. figuring out this comic stuff one baby step at a time 😌

still gonna try my best to work on this as quickly as i can. coloring these pages is actually a nice stress-relief for me once i come home from work haha

also bonus luigi sketch because look at him

[thatwriterchick222]

save a horse, ride... two cowboys? (arthur morgan and joel miller x f/reader) AU

summary:

“What’s a pretty young thing like yourself doin’ out here all alone?” The older man said as he approached you. You licked your lips, turning to peer inside the window of the saloon, spotting your fiance chatting with a few men at a poker table. “I’m not alone.” “That’s a shame.” The older man said, his eyes running down your body. “It is.” You replied. “Well…” The brunette leaned forward, peering through the same window you had looked through just prior, his eyes searching. “Your husband ain’t with you right now…” You smiled, trying not to let his smell of earth and smoke as he leaned closer to you cloud your judgment. “Fiance, actually.” “Even better.”

a/n: y'all this one is kinda crazyyyy... porn with plot at its finest. i also love combining my hyperfixations teehee

-------------

“Bend over this table, now .” The man’s gruff voice came from behind you, his large hands shoving you down onto the wooden table. You yelped as your cheek came into contact with the hard surface, your bare breasts pressed painfully down, your body completely trapped by his strong arms.

You struggled, but couldn’t fight the moan that escaped your throat when you felt something hard press into your backside through the rough material of his jeans. 

“Good thing we tied her up.” The other man said– Arthur, you think you heard him being addressed as– and you wiggled your arms that were tied behind your back, the rope looped around your ribcage a few times. 

All your clothes had been forcefully ripped off aside from your pantyhose. While you were practically naked, the men were fully clothed, the roughness of their attire giving you a painful reminder every time it brushed up against your bare skin. A shiver ran through you.

###

You had been out for a few drinks in town with your fiance, whom you honestly had gotten bored of within the span of a few minutes, as per usual. But, it wasn’t your choice to be engaged. Your parents arranged it, and you had no other option but to go through with it. 

This was where the so-called “high class” life had gotten you, you supposed. 

When you went out for a smoke, you spotted two men leaning casually up against the brick wall, their hats tipped down just enough that you had to squint to see their eyes in the dimness of the streetlights. They looked like proper cowboys.

From what you could tell, they both seemed older, but one of them more so. He had a salt and pepper beard and you saw the traces of even greyer hair underneath his tan leather hat. He had a green plaid shirt that had the top buttons undone, and you swore you could see a dusting of chest hair beneath it. 

You watched the man reach up and take a draw of his cigarette, noticing his hands. They looked like working hands, hands that had been through a lot. Strong hands. You watched him blow the cigarette smoke out through his nostrils. Then, to your surprise, he looked up at you, meeting your eyes with his own.

You blushed, averting your eyes immediately, focusing on the cigarette in your gloved hand that was almost burnt out. But you couldn’t help yourself as you looked back over at the man, and he was nudging the younger one beside him, drawing his attention to you as well. Oh shit .

The other man had lighter brown hair, his jawline wide and sharp, dusted in the slightest bit of stubble. He had an even bushier mustache on his upper lip, and his brow was furrowed as he looked up, eyes finding you immediately. 

###

The younger man, Arthur, came over to the other side of the table, abruptly reaching down and fisting his hand in your hair, yanking it back. You gasped as he craned your neck painfully, forcing you to look up at him, a playful smirk on his face.

Your mouth hung open as you stared at him, breathing heavily. His eyes flicked down your face, and you yelped as you felt the other man grinding himself into your backside, rubbing against your bare skin.

Arthur hummed. “Let me put that pretty mouth to use, hm?”

###

“What’s a pretty young thing like yourself doin’ out here all alone?” The older man said as he approached you, the metal of his spurs rattling on the concrete sidewalk. His voice was soft and deep, with an attractive southern twang. You let out a small laugh, shaking your head.

“Young?” You smiled. You were only twenty-four, but from what you had been through, and where you were, you didn’t feel like it.

The other man came up beside him, his hands resting on his gun belt. “Still… Alone, in a place like this?”

You licked your lips, turning to peer inside the window of the saloon, spotting your fiance chatting with a few men at a poker table. “I’m not alone.”

“That’s a shame.” The older man said, his eyes running down your body. You swallowed, shifting your weight to avoid the heat pooling in your stomach. It was intriguing, this outright form of flattery. You liked how forward they were, unlike the people you knew. Where you were from, even hinting at it got you a slap on the wrist. 

“It is.” You replied, tossing your used cigarette to the damp cobblestone sidewalk and watching it go out. 

“Well…” The brunette leaned forward, peering through the same window you had looked through just prior, his eyes searching. “Your husband ain’t with you right now…”

You smiled, trying not to let his smell of earth and smoke as he leaned closer to you cloud your judgment. “Fiance, actually.”

“Even better.” The older one said, reaching up and placing his cigarette between his lips, his eyes dark and hungry as they raked over you.

###

A rush of excitement shot through you when Arthur reached for his gun belt, undoing it with ease and unbuttoning his pants with one hand. He kept his other hand knotted in your hair, the hair you had taken so much time pinning up before you went out. 

God, your fiance was probably worried sick at that moment. Running around the saloon, asking people if they’d seen you, calling out your name on street corners. You fought a smile at the thought of him being worried sick, while you were tied up, pinned between two filthy cowboys in some barn in the middle of nowhere. Part of you wanted him to find you like this. To see you getting something you never got with him. 

When Arthur finally pulled himself out of the restraints of his pants, you felt a chill run down your spine at the size of him. You had only ever seen your fiance’s, and it was… underwhelming, to say the least. 

You swallowed thickly, feeling the other man’s warm hand run up your back, grabbing your arms that were tied. 

You were utterly helpless as Arthur guided himself to your parted lips. “Open wide for me, darlin’.”

to be continued on ao3!!!

[cyberwears]

Days of Old and Nights of New (Jim Hopper X male!reader

Prompt: a hurt-comfort using the line “I am so sick of feeling like crying all the time”

Request: No Pairing: Jim hopper X male!reader, Eleven X male!reader (platonic)

Word count: 3.6k

Warning: thoughts of cheating. doubt. feelings of depression, mentions of drinking

(Set up: post season 2 pre season 3, christmas time. Hopper is taking care of EL in the cabin and has been so wrapped up in the stuff with El he loses sight of his husband)

My brain decided there wasnt enough hopper fanfiction so i present this. i hope it does Hopper justice.

The day was cold but the night was colder without him by your side. The blankets that lined the couch felt heavier in the trailer that you and your husband lived in by the lake. The sun kissed the skyline as it set and the moon arose from its own slumber as you curled up on the couch alone and thought about where you were in life. There had been days where Hopper and you had spent cuddling in front of a ceramic heater and mindlessly watched whatever was on the TV at the time, enjoying each other's presence and you feeling safe under his touch. But now? Most days you didn’t see him unless it was a couple moments before he rushed off to work, without even a good morning or kiss or even a good morning.

You thought about how things started. A very young version of you was going to pick up your father from a diner and saw a man sitting at the counter. Being friendly, you made your way over to the seat next to him and sat down. You ordered a coffee and looked over at him and gave a polite wave and as he looked over you were captivated by the storm that seemed to rest along his furrowed brows and the depth of his gray eyes. There was a very subtle 5 o’clock shadow that graced his jawline and cheekbones, a thin mustache dusting his upper lip.

“Hello. Do you need something?” He said, breaking me from the trance you found yourself in. “Sorry, I got lost in thought. I didn’t mean to stare, chief.” you mumble and turn back to the counter and wait for my father to let me know he is ready to go. “Yeah well some people don’t like being interrupted." Hopper started and grumbled into his cup as he turned away before putting a five dollar bill on the counter and walking out the door. You frown as you turn to your father and motion for him that it was time to leave. He stands up and follows you out and you drive him home before pulling out of the driveway to complete your own errands and think about your encounter with the very broodish Jim hopper.

Over the 4 years you knew him you broke his walls down and grew closer to him, eventually you revealed how you felt for him and much to your surprise he felt the same. A few months later you were married (informally as gay marriage was not an option) and moved in together.

You let out a sigh of frustration as you remember how nice those days felt and burrowed further into the blankets that lay on the couch to escape the cold of the room. Normally you would have laid down in bed but it made you feel so small to be in the bed, let alone the room without Hopper so you settled for the couch. A heavy, sinking feeling in your chest that you could only describe as sorrow filled your whole body as you felt tears well up in your eyes. You haven’t seen Hopper in days. Christmas was tomorrow and here you were alone in the dark.

Normally around this time you and Hopper would have decorated the small trailer and would be eating and dancing to the music on the radio before settling down with a couple of beers and watching movies, you wanting to open presents early and him saying “no” and “if you open them now, you’ll ruin the christmas magic”. You let a few more tears slip, not hearing a truck pull up and the door open.

You feel the cold from outside rush in and quickly you wipe your tears and pretend to be asleep on the couch as you hear boots thump around the living room and stuff being rummaged through. The lights being flicked on can be seen behind closed eyelids and listening to Hopper talk to himself about finding food for “El” and how he had to go to the cabin and clean it up. You stay as still as you can and only shift to face the couch. You couldn’t stop the tears from running down your cheeks as you heard Hopper talk about this “El” person and how he was fixing a cabin up for them. Once you heard the door close you sat up and sighed heavily as you went to stand, tripping up on the blanket and moving to the bedroom and dropping the blanket on the bed then head to the shower.

You start the shower and remove the 3 day old clothes from your body and hop in. You lather the shampoo in your hair and rinse it out, the heavy feeling in your chest only gathering more weight until you are sitting in the tub and letting the water of the shower run down your body and let your emotions run down the drain along with the soap and water. You didn’t realize how long you were in the shower until it was ice cold and there was a knock on the door of the bathroom. Snapping out of whatever trance you were in you stood back up, the bones in your legs popping under your weight and the pressure you shut off the shower and wrap a towel around your hips as then make your way towards the door after glancing towards the mirror. You didn’t recognize the person in the mirror anymore, hair dripping wet, your eyes rimmed red, your face gaunt and pale.

As you stare at yourself in the mirror you hear another knock on the bathroom door, sounding more urgent, filled with worry. Opening the door you come face to face with your husband of 2 years and watch as he smiles at you, the heavy feeling in your chest becoming lighter but not disappearing. You force a smile that doesn't quite reach your eyes as he steps aside and lets you out. He pressed a kiss to your lips as you walked by to the bedroom, hopper following you. You grab one of his shirts and throw it on and pull on a pair of boxers then turn to face him.

“How was work?” you whisper as you lay on the bed and look towards him as he lit a cigarette and watch him unbutton his work shirt, discarding it by the dresser the two of you share and shrugging as he started working on removing his belt. “Same old, paranoid Murray called in again, something about Russians in Hawkins. Other than that it was slow. How was your day sweetheart?” he said as he finished his cigarette and sat on the bed. “ I didn’t do much. Woke up, went to work. Talked to the Byers. We should do Christmas with them this year. Joyce invited us again. It would be rude to not go.” You said as you faced him. “Why don’t we just watch movies like we normally do?” he said. “I want to do something different, shake things up. Plus if you get off work late I really don’t want to be alone on christmas.” you reply simply, hiding how you really felt from him.

“Alright, we can do that. I won’t be late. It is Christmas after all.” Jim said with a soft smile and leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to your lips, his facial hair tickling your face. You smile into the kiss, the feeling from earlier dissipating as you sink into his side. He lays down and holds you close.

The next morning you wake up to hopper still in bed (much to your surprise) you press a kiss to his head and get up, heading to the kitchen. You start coffee and make breakfast. A while later hopper stumbles into the kitchen still half asleep. He kisses you and grabs a cup to make some coffee. You turn away from him and look out of the window to see snow falling. “It looks like it is gonna be a white Christmas this year.” you said and let out a little yawn. He lets out a chuckle and a comment about how slick the roads are going to be and you roll your eyes. You pick up the plates of food you made and take them over to the table he was sitting at and set them down. “Merry christmas my love” you said as you took a bite of your food. “Merry Christmas, handsome.” Jim says before digging into his own plate. The two of you eat in silence and enjoy the soft music of the radio before he stands. “Do you have to go in today? It is Christmas after all.” you say, standing and taking your own plate to the sink and set the dishware into the sink.

“I do. I’m sorry baby. I am still the chief of Hawkins, I don't really get sick days.” He said as he pressed another kiss to your cheek and walked off to get dressed. You let out a sigh, that sinking feeling coming back and settling into your chest again. You go to the bedroom and throw on a maroon sweater and some blue jeans. You brush your hair and teeth before slipping the necklace hopper got for your anniversary and playing with the silver band on your finger. It was a simple band with the date hopper proposed engraved on the inside. To you though, it meant the world and showed how much you love and need him in your life. Jim sauntered over to you after he finished buttoning his shirt and adjusted his holder, reaching behind you to grab his hat off the dresser and kissed you again. “Alright, I will see you later. I love you, stay safe my sweet husband.” He mumbled into your hair as he wrapped you in a bone crushing hug. “Remember we have dinner with the Byers and don’t be late.” you teased him. He nodded and went on his way to work

It was roughly 4pm when you arrived at the Byers house (as you went and got presents for all of them). Knocking on the door Joyce answered it with an enthusiastic “(y/n)! Come in, it's freezing outside.” before inviting you in. you put the presents you got for the boys under the tree they had and join the three Byers in the kitchen where will and jonathan was having a conversation about who knows what with will. You ruffle Will's hair with a “hey kiddo, how have you been?” and a pat on Jonathan's shoulders. Will sends you a beaming smile as he talks about his newest d&d campaign. You had no idea what anything meant but you decided to humor him and listen, asking questions here and there. After an hour or so the four of you ate the food you all helped Joyce make and made conversation, your eyes flickering every so often to the empty chair that was supposed to contain your husband.

While the boys were obvious to it, Joyce was not. She sent you a sympathetic smile then turned back to the boys as Will asked if they could open presents. Joyce nodded and you offered to help with cleaning up. Joyce tried to shoo you away saying that Jonathan could do it but you insisted. Jonathan offered to help and the both of you cleaned them up.

“Hey, are you doing alright? I noticed you were tense and kept looking at the chair next to you.” He asked as you did the dishes. “Yeah, it's just that hopper was supposed to be here for dinner with me for christmas.” you reply with a sigh and hand another plate for him to dry. He nods and purses his lips in thought. “Are you his brother or cousin or something? I never understood how you two always seem to be together.” He said as he put the dish away.

You let out a laugh and leaned against the sink a bit. “Sometimes I feel like it, but no. we’re uhh” you hesitate for a second. “We’re married. Not officially but we made our vows and got drunk in exchange for a ceremony .” you whisper and chuckle at the memory of Hopper dancing on the table after drinking to much. You wait for rejection and look towards the younger boy. He nods and shrugs his shoulders. “Makes enough sense. If you’re worried about me being upset by that, don’t be. You’re still cool in my eyes. I’ve never seen will be so excited to talk and be around someone.” he said as he turn back to you, leaning against the counter

You breathe out a sigh of relief and finish the last dish before handing it off to jonathan. While draining the sink you dry your hands and the two of you head to the living room and ask Joyce if you can use her phone. She nods and hands Jonathan a present she had fished from under the tree. You move over to the phone and dial the police station number in.

“Hello. Hawkins Police station, Flo speaking.” Flo greeted you. “Hello, it is (y/n). I was wanting to know if Jim Hopper was there?” you spoke softly and heard a soft sigh. “No sugar, Jim left about an hour and a half ago. He could be home right now. He said he had a matter to attend to.” she said, tiredness lacing her voice. You nod and tell her thanks and merry christmas then hang up. You dial the number of the trailer and wait as it goes to dial tone. You let out a soft groan and hang up the phone then go sit down next to Will who was practically vibrating in his seat to show you the action figure he got. You chuckle and tell him to look under the tree again. His eyes widen again and he dives under the tree to pull out 5 more presents. He gives 2 of them to Jonathann and 1 to Joyce then claims the last 2 for himself. He excitedly tears off wrapping paper and lets out a whoop in excitement when he sees the full painters set and the easel you got him.

He hugs your waist tight and thanks you before running off to his room to put his stuff away. As he does you look towards Jonathan as he opens his gifts to see a brand new polaroid camera and 4 extra reels of film for it. “Thank you (Y/n), this is fucking awesome” he says and comes over to hug you. Joyce lets out a half hearted “language” before smiling wide as she opens her gift to see a delicately made chain that had a charm with Will and Jonathan's birth stones inlay in it. She smiles wide and lets out a very grateful thank you, saying you didn’t have to get them anything. You just shrug and smile as you wave it off. “I wanted to. Merry Christmas guys.” you said standing up, walking to will’s room, lingering in the doorway as he excitedly talks into the walkie talkie he has to his other dubbed “party members” about what he got for christmas.

You softly knock on the door frame and he whips back around to you and smiles wide. “Can I come in?” you ask softly and he nods. He tells his friends he has to go then closes the channel and looks over to you as you sit down on the bed. “How about when the stores open up tomorrow we go and get you some canvas and frames to paint on?” you ask as he hugs you tighter as if he was pleading you to. “Ask your mom first, though. We don’t want her to worry about you again. She’s had enough worrying in the past few weeks ok?”

Will nods and grins wildly then rushes off to ask his mom and you stood up and followed him out, leaning against the wall as Will asked to go to the art store tomorrow. Joyce said yes and Will started bouncing around the room with excitement. You smile and push yourself off the wall, announcing you need to get home soon. Will groaned out and ran over and hugged you again, thanking you for the Christmas presents. Jonathan and Joyce said their good bye and Jonathan walked you out to your car and gave you another hug, wishing you merry Christmas and good luck. You hug him tight and thank him for listening to you and tell him goodnight. You drive off and head back to the trailer, turning up the radio as the tears start rolling down your cheeks. I crank the window down and let the cold air brush across my face, drying the tears on my face. WIthout realizing it you speed past the trailer and go to the quarry. Parking and cutting the engine the car you get out and sit on the hood of the car. You let out cries and angered screams, the sorrow feeling gripping your chest and tearing its way out through your throat. After a few minutes of screaming your throat raw and crying you felt numb.

You sit in the cold looking over the quarry, trying to grapple with the fact that Hopper broke his promise and that he was probably with that “El” chick right now. You start to feel tears roll down your face again but no actual emotion behind it. The cold starts to seep into your bones as you lean back against the frozen hood of your car and look up at the stars and let out another guttural scream that shakes you to your core and closes your eyes, wondering if you’ll ever be enough for Hopper. You are so far into your head you don’t notice a truck pull up beside you and park. You feel the car settle and look over and see hopper sitting on the hood next to you in silence. He looks over at you and sighs, placing a hand on your head and played with your hair.

“Hi.” he whispered, smiling .” you look over at him and send him a small wave, a frown on your face still. “You missed Christmas Jim, you promised you would be here. How was El?” you asked bitter, your throat raw from the screaming. His face dropped, his eyes widening. “How do you know that name?” he said a bit louder. You sit up roughly. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe from the way you always talk about her when I am ‘asleep’ and laying on the couch as you stomp through the house every night looking for food and drinks for this El girl. When did you plan on telling me you’re leaving me?” you said and numbly look at him.

Hopper frowned and looked down. “Hey. Hey. Hey. look at me. I am not going to leave you. I would never. I love you and only you. Plus El is not a woman. She’s a little kid. I am protecting her.” he said and held your face. Your face fell and you looked away from shame. Hopper pulled you closer to him and buried your face into his chest as you cried more. Your throat burned as you sob openly into his chest. “I am so sick of feeling like crying all the time” you said as you looked him in the eyes. “Whoa, where is this coming from?” he asked as he held you tight against him. “I don’t know. But what I do know is you haven’t held me or even looked at me for months. I am so tired baby.” you said, beating on his chest and letting out all of your frustrations until it was weak enough that you stopped and broke down.

Hopper held you tight and just let you vent and cry and scream. Do whatever you need. When you finished and your cry diminished to silence he looked at you. “Hey, look at me. I wanna show you something. Are you ok to drive?” he asked and you nodded. “Ok, you get your car started and follow me. Just trust me, ok?” you nod and get into the driver seat and follow him through the woods until you pull up to a cabin.

You park and shut off the engine. You watch as Hopper goes to your car and opens your door and holds out a hand for you. You grin and take it. He kisses you passionately and starts to pull you to the cabin, telling you to step over a wire. You follow his directions and he goes up to a door and does a rhythmic knock on the door and you cock your head to the side in confusion, then the door opens. He pulls you through gently and closes the door, knocking it. He motions for you to look around and you see the cabin completely decorated head to toe with Christmas wreaths and a tree. 2 presents underneath them. You smile wildly and grin bigger.

You see a small girl come around the corner timidly. Hopper looks at her and smiles. “Hey, you’re El right?” you whisper and she nods. “It’s ok. I am not going to hurt you. I am a friend of Hoppers.” “No. you’re more than a friend.” He said and kissed your forehead. “Now. Let's celebrate.” He said and you bounded over to the couch, plopping down. El smiles and follows your movements with a childlike wonder. A few months go by and you have moved into the cabin, you get closer with El and start to see her as the daughter you could never have. Seeing Hopper happy made you happy. That is all you need in this life

[roaldseth]

HOT OLD MEN* of SHIN MEGAMI TENSEI

Mainline Edition

MegaTen isn’t known for its adult cast, but this is a chance to take a look at the hotties that go unlooked.

-

*this is very subjective. There is age ambiguity, so “old men” is personal perception with some entries.

-

Stephen (Shin Megami Tensei)

Hotness: ★★★☆☆

His face looks on the young side, but he still makes an entrance by being a silver fox. Dressed to impress, suits are hot. Glasses: also hot. The hair on his right side can either be hot or... not... depending on the art.

-

Mekata (Shin Megami Tensei II)

Hotness: ★★★★☆

This man knows the importance of being well kept. Not only does he dress well, but keeping his hair in a timeless style for his age is just the icing on the cake. Not to mention grey is gold when it comes to a hot old gentleman.

-

Tsuzumi (Shin Megami Tensei: NINE)

Hotness: ★★★☆☆

Two things: goatee and cheekbones. The stubble mustache he has makes the facial hair just asymmetrical enough so that it ties together with his mildly messy hair. Those lines near his eyes are also doing him many favors.

-

Hikawa (Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne)

Hotness: ★☆☆☆☆

Not traditionally what we’d think of as hot with that hairline and trademark M styled bangs, but the man does have style, which carries his attractiveness. Forgetting the size of his forehead for his suit.

-

Dante (Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne Maniax Edition)

Hotness: ★★★★★

Pushing the idea of being “old” (some consensus being mid 30s in DMC2), but if there was going to be a hot oldie rep for SMT3, it’d be Dante. He knows exactly what he’s doing with that chest out look.

-

Gore (Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey)

Hotness: ★★☆☆☆

A strong and confident looking man with a solid, angular facial structure. The depth in those eye socks and the high-bridged nose make a man conventionally intimidating. Not much of a fan of baldness however.

-

Irving (Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey)

Hotness: ★★★☆☆

Though rather average looking with a standard haircut, one can’t help but be charmed. It might be the smirk, or that slight rise in the eyebrows. Who’s to say, but Irving has this sense of being a hottie.

-

Tyler (Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey)

Hotness: ★★☆☆☆

Another fine cut man with a sturdy jawline that captivates. His baby blues are something to stare at all day, but the proportioning of his face makes it seem a little awkward. The chin is small and his nose is long.

-

Blair (Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey)

Hotness: ★★★★☆

Having the eyes of many worn years, there’s something to say in a man’s aged eyes. But that’s only the beginning. His beard gives that sophistication of being old. Though his face is rather long, it doesn't distract

-

Jack (Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey)

Hotness: ★★★★★

This man is certainly a dark horse to the hottie scene. The wizened years outlining his brow, cheeks, and chin, the few tussled strands of swept back hair: poetic cinema. Mustaches aren’t for me, but he pulls it off.

-

Hope (Shin Megami Tensei IV)

Hotness: ★★★★★

The perfect balance between beard, mustache, and haircut: short and just enough of unkemptness. It just works so well. The drooping lid on top of his steely grays and visible age lets you in on a man that has experienced life.

-

K (Shin Megami Tensei IV)

Hotness: ★★★★☆

Another fine HELLO SIR type of man. His long, lion’s mane of curled hair of 80s rock star is something to run my fingers through. Although I will say his square jaw is not exactly my taste, but that’s not to say it isn’t great.

-

Tayama (Shin Megami Tensei IV)

Hotness: ★★☆☆☆

I am usually a fan of the swept back hair, but something about it just isn’t working for me. But, dang, do he dress fine. That two unbuttoned down shirt showing he isn’t afraid. Tayama also really doesn’t show his age too much.

-

Fujiwara (Shin Megami Tensei IV)

Hotness: ★★★☆☆

A casually dressed looker: Fujiwara is an interesting one. His gray hair and wide chin puts a lot of charm, and yet there's something about that dimple from the slight smile. But, other than that he's mainly average.

-

Skins (Shin Megami Tensei IV)

Hotness: ★★☆☆☆

Not conventionally attractive, but those eyes are something to look at. They're just so cheery. The fact that his lower lip pouts outward isn't something I go for along with the baldness. But, not that there's anything bad.

-

Nikkari (Shin Megami Tensei IV: Apocalypse)

Hotness: ★★★★★

There’s no bad place to start. He’s peak hot old man. I’m not disappointed that he doesn’t have gray hair because his color is still going and it looks so good on him. I’m sorry, Nikkari, you’re too hot for words.

-

Boss (Shin Megami Tensei IV: Apocalypse)

Hotness: ★★☆☆☆

Boss would be more attractive if his hair wasn't a middle part. There's nothing wrong with it long, but it does look a little bland being equal and choppy cut on both sides. The rest of him however, very, very nice.

-

Aogami (Shin Megami Tensei V)

Hotness: ★★★★☆

Despite not looking it, old man in my mind. Someone needs to be old in SMTV besides Yakumo. Also it is a mystery to me as to why he’s so good-looking. It’s probably the hair and that fierce look in his eyes.

-

Hayao Koshimizu (Shin Megami Tensei V)

Hotness: ★★★★★

Like Aogami, I refuse to believe he’s not old. What does mark him different, and higher, than Aogami is his 3-piece suit and his hair being black, not blue. It does things, especially that smirk added to his face.

-

Shohei Yakumo (Shin Megami Tensei V)

Hotness: ★★★☆☆

Besides his uniform, a lot is not really expanded upon with his face and hair. Short cut hair, high cheeks, and that particular line around his eye and bridge of his nose. The hat does add that seductive mystery though.

[stardust-ghoul27]

Beauty And the Vampire

Chapter Two Dracopia x OC!

A/N: Hi guys! here's chapter two finally lol. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, especially since its a bit longer. Btw if chapter three is a bit late that's due to me being busy with school and testing (sorry lol :) again if you have any creative criticism of this work don't be afraid to comment or let me know! :)

catch my story now on AO3!

Liliana paced around the room for several hours looking at all of the expensive and ancient relics that adorned the old oak shelves. Right as she turned to look out the large window that was covered by heavy black curtains she heard the heavy wooden door creak open once again. At the sound of the door, she stood up straight and turned on her heels to face it looking at who stood in the doorway.

Two ghouls, one she recognized as Aether and a new ghoul that she was yet to learn the name of. Both demonic creatures stood on either side of the man who stood in the middle. He wore a white lace button-up blouse with a red and black vest on top which framed his figure quite well Liliana thought.

The man had dusty brown hair and sideburns with black Khol circles around his eyes and on his upper lip a small mustache accompanying his black-painted upper lip. Looking fully up at his eyes she noticed something quite hypnotizing about the man. He had beautiful dichromatic eyes. One a hazel green and the other pale white as if it were dead. Noticing her staring, the strange man simply smirked at her.

“Like what you see eh cara?” he smirked devilishly as he approached her slowly. Aether looked towards the other ghoul motioning his head towards the door to lock it.

“W-what do you want with me?!” Liliana said scared as she looked at the man in front of her. He was quite attractive Liliana had to admit but something about him made her skin crawl. “Ah, nothing to fear about me cara. I mean you no harm if you mean me no harm.” He said his tone was stricter.

“My name is Copia Emeritus. And yours might be?" He asked, stepping closer to pick up Liliana's hand and pressing a kiss to the back of it as he looked back up at her smirking.

"I...Liliana. My name is Liliana." She mumbled, staring into his hypnotizing eyes.

"Well, Ms. Liliana…why did you think it fit to trespass into my forest, into my home!" he snarled, turning around with a smoldering look in his mismatched gaze.

"I-i mean you or your home no harm, sir. I just wanted to see this place with my own eyes. See if the myth they talked about was real."

"What myth? Who?" The man spat, grabbing Liliana's chin so she could look at him.

"The...there's a myth in my town that in these old cathedrals, there's an old beast of a vampire guarding this place," Liliana said swallowing as he pulled her face closer and smirked

"Well, I guess you just found the "myth" himself." He smirked, cocking his head to the side as he smiled wide.

Liliana gasped in horror.

The man had sharp white fangs that were as sharp as needles. Besides that, they looked like the traditional vampire fangs described in all of her fairytale and mystery books.

Copia laughed at Liliana's wide-eyed expression. "Never seen a vampire before dolce?" He asked tracing her jawline and inhaling her scent. "Mmmmm you smell wonderful dolcezza it's a shame I can't take a bite." Copia breathed

"P-please don't hurt me please I mean you and your people no harm." She said, shaking as he cornered against a wall. Liliana turned her head away once he stepped back to look at her.

"Swiss escort her down to her chambers," Copia commanded in a strict tone turning around as he walked over to Aether to whisper something in his ear that Liliana couldn't hear.

The tall Swiss ghoul walked over to her. "I'm sorry about him, he hasn't fed in years and I don't mean to scare you by saying that my lady," Swiss said, taking her arm gently. As he walked her out of the office.

The hallways of the cathedral were intriguing and intricate. Swiss laughed quietly as he glanced down at Liliana as she gaped in awe at the architecture of the old breezy hallways of the cathedral.

"Just wait until you see the grand halls if you do get to see them. I'm not quite sure what Copia has planned for you." As Swiss led her up a spiraling tall staircase.

"We're almost there, don't worry...You're awfully quiet. cat got your tongue?" Swiss asked looking down at Liliana as he let go of her arm.  

"I'm not sure why? Am I supposed to talk while some ancient vampire who according to you hasn't fed or eaten in years and his hell beasts or whatever the fuck you guys are...are here in the same building with me. I mean I'm not sure what I'm supposed to say." 

"Hey, no need to be hostile about it. And yeah we are ghouls summoned from...yes hell. All of us that you see. We mean you no harm just like you told Copia that you meant us no harm." 

Swiss said as they turned up to a dusty abandoned wing of the cathedral. It was still beautiful but didn't hold the same amaranthine as the hallways downstairs. Sure it was dusty and cobwebs adorned the beautiful spirals and buttresses.

"Well, here we are! I hope you like this room it does have one of the nicest views of the forest and gardens."

Swiss said lightly as he pushed the door open to reveal a beautiful large bedroom with a small bathroom connected. "thanks..." Liliana said, stepping inside the room that looked like it was from inside a fairytale.  "Swiss." the ghoul said reminding her. "thank you Swiss...and I'm sorry about earlier Im just-" "scared, confused yeah I get it it's ok." Swiss smiled a wide and bright smile.

“oh and if you need anything just come find me alright.” He flashed Liliana a bright and wide smile as his tail whipped merrily back and forth behind him as he shut the large wooden door.

Liliana sighed as she sat herself down on the edge of the bed smoothing out the covers by where she sat taking in everything that just occurred in the short amount of time she was there. Especially the terrifying but seductive man that she just met despite all the warning signs and red flags going off in her head her heart just felt different.

Her brain told her to get out of there to run as far as she could and never return. Whilst her heart told her to stay to help the poor old vampire who according to his ghoul hasn't fed in years and to get to know him.

Liliana shivered at the thought of him feeding from her. Sinking his pearly white and sharp fangs into her neck. Why was she so attracted to him she shouldn't have been? It was dangerous. But hell she did have to admit he was quite the charming man. Liliana thought, rubbing her neck.

But she quickly discarded the thought of the vampire and sat up sauntering into the bathroom to clean herself up and take a nap.

Turning on the shower and taking her muddied and torn dress off she stepped into the shower and let the warm soothing water run over her cold skin.

Shuddering out a soft and shaky breath she let the warm water wash away not only her aches but also her troubles and the thoughts of the seductive man that she had just met and the sight of his fangs from earlier that was engraved into her brain.

As she stepped out shivering from the cold she quickly wrapped a fluffy black bath towel around her body before realizing something. She had no clothes.

In a rush to leave her mother and the house, Liliana must have forgotten clothes. “Shit.” She muttered under her breath. As if the universe had heard her troubles Aether knocked on the door and came in with some clothes. “Hey…Oh…Oh my lord, I'm so sorry. I just…I'll just drop these here.” Aether said, setting the small stack of clothes down on a small stool by the door.

With her cheeks, a warm pink from the ghoul walking in on her she watched him quickly shut the door behind him. 

Walking over to the stool Liliana found two dresses and some undergarments.

The first dress was white on top with beautiful lace frills across the chest and small black buttons in the middle.

The dress had a long black skirt that practically touched the floor and a black corset to pair with it.

Underneath that first dress was another dress that was all black. Similar to the other dress this dress also had black frills across the chest with some buttons and had a collar that was made of lace and stocked out of the top of all the buttons.

The sleeves on this dress were big and also had lace around the bottom cuffs of the sleeves.

This dress similar to the other dress Liliana looked at also had a corset. This corset had buttons on both sides and one small chain that connected both buttons. The pattern on the front of the corset was the same as the long black skirt at the bottom.

Picking up the black dress and the matching corset Liliana slipped into the undergarments first and then slipped into the black dress with a bit of added difficulty. Stepping over to the large black-rimmed mirror next to the bathroom Liliana pulled the corset tight to her tieing it up in the back as she slid a pair of black tights on underneath.

Sighing Liliana walked over to the large window that overlooked some of the trees in the large and thick forest outside. Hearing a loud knock on the door Liliana quickly whipped her head around to find a ghoul standing at the door. "Ah, your dressed I see that Aether brought your clothes huh?" The ghoul said smiling.

This ghoul was different. New at least that she thought. "Uh…y-yeah he did," Liliana said fully turning around to face the hellish creature in Infront of her still trying to get used to seeing them. The ghoul just stared at her for a moment before saying

"you don't know me do you?" Liliana then shook her head "No...no I don't heh...I only know swiss, Aether, and Sodo."

"Well not to worry I'm cumulus! I see that you also picked out the black dress that's my favorite choice that our old sisters of sin used to wear. Along with the white one but that's beside the point. Anyways Copia wanted me to fetch you for dinner. That is if you wanted to come." Cumulus said softly at the end. 

"Thank you cumulus…I'll think about it." Liliana smiled at the ghoulette.

"Ok just come down whenever you're ready or fetch one of us ghouls and we'll bring you down there." She said turning to leave.

"Wait Cumulus!"

"Yes, darling? "

The ghoul said, whipping around to look back at Liliana.

"If you don't mind me asking what or…who were the sisters of sin?" Liliana asked curiously, twiddling her fingers.

"Oh they were like your traditional sisters or nun's in a normal Catholic church but here we worship the olde one so we called them sisters of sin but that was before that…night. Now most of them are dead or in hiding." Cumulus said, rubbing the back of her neck and looking down at the floor. All of her memories from that night flooded back to her.

"What night? What happened?" "Listen Liliana was it? I'll have to explain another time I-it's a long story and it happened a long time ago." The ghoulette said looking somewhat distraught at the end trying to keep a smile on her face. "well If you need me I'll be downstairs at dinner." Cumulus said giving a weak smile. 

Whatever it was that had happened here at this church must have been bad. No not bad terrible and Liliana wanted to know what had happened. 

It was now late into the night and Liliana had decided to go out to the deck to take a breather after pulling a random book off of the bookshelf. Liliana tried and tried to think of something other than the vampire that was a few levels below her or how she also tried to distract herself from thinking and pondering about what so bad could have happened here to make the ghouls so upset.

 Then she heard a knock on the door. Getting up Liliana sighed quietly to herself praying it wasn't Copia or whatever his name was Liliana Couldn't really care to remember right now. Opening the door Liliana was met with Aether standing in the doorway with a plate in his hand. "do you mind if I come in?" Aether asked Looking up past Liliana to look inside the room. 

"Yeah totally," Liliana said opening the door wider to let the tall burley ghoul in.

"I thought since you didn't come down for dinner that I would bring this up for you. We always have a bit of extras because Copia never really eats. To him and his brothers real food is pretty much tasteless." Aether said as he came in, handing the warm plate to Liliana.

"Oh thank you Aether. You didn't have to." Liliana said, looking up at the quintessentiance ghoul. 

"But I wanted to I-" he said thinking for a minute on what to say as he shifted in the doorway. "I know it's hard to go around and get out and with new people involved, especially Copia and you're in a new place. It's strange. You don't have to stay if you don't want to though." Aether said looking down at Liliana his silver mask shone in the light of the room. 

"Yeah I know…I might stick around for a bit though maybe try to get to know that old vampire downstairs. Because who in their lifetime can say that they have met a vampire before." Liliana chuckled. 

"Yeah that'd be a great idea me and the rest of the ghouls would love to have you around. Well I'm gonna head downstairs back to the ghoul dens sleep tight Liliana." Aether said  smiling as he turned to leave. 

Then it hit her that Liliana remembered that strange night here that Cumulus was talking about.

"Wait Aether!" 

She called after him. "Yeah?" "I-you don't have to answer this if you don't want to but I was talking to Cumulus earlier and she was telling me about the sisters of sin and how they left after a night a horrible night and she just seemed so upset by it-" 

“That night…I.” Aether said sitting down on the edge of the bed as he looked down at the floor his silver mask shining in the dim light of the room as his gaze was stuck on the floor as if something was so interesting about it. 

“That night-” “Aether listen i must have struck a nerve or something I am so sorry you dont have to tell me I-” “no its fine ill be alright. That night was just so hard for all of us ghouls, Copia, the papa’s…the whole church in general.” “siblings of sin went into hiding or died. A lot of us ghouls died or begged to be sent back to the pits of hell but it was…just too late for some of us.” “what…happened.”  Liliana asked as she watched Aether look up at her his red ember eyes shining bright as tears threatened to spill from his eyes.

 “A long long time ago this church used to be bustling with people. People who were passionate in there place here. Gave everything and were proud of their beliefs. But the town near here didnt like our practices or what we believed in so much. So one night while we were all asleep…a angry mob came and tried to burn the church down. Many were killed or were hurt trying to save or help get others out of the church espcially us ghouls. And Cumulus…she…got hurt badly and almost died. But thankfuly she didnt. It also didn’t help that she was newly summoned either didn’t expect that to happen to her on her second day on Earth. And the siblings who did live went into hiding far from here.” Aether explained as he blinked the tears out of his eyes. 

“Oh Aether im-im so sorry I-”  “never knew yeah it’s fine you know we all just…have a hard time with it but its behind us now right? So now we just look forward and towards Lucifer for guidance.” Aether said looking back at Liliana. 

“After that part of the church burnt down and it was just us few ghouls, copia and the papa’s we rehabilitated over here on the North wing of the cathedral. This place is huge after all and I do hope you get to see it all.” Aether said giving Liliana a sad but happy smile as he turned to leave. “Aether?”  “yes Liliana?”  “thank you…Thank you for sharing that even though you didn’t have to.”  

“you're welcome. Sleep tight.” He smiled as he shut the door behind him. 

[creedslove]

IDK WHY GODDAMN JAVIER PEÑA HAS SUCH A CHOKEHOLD ON ME HES SO FINE MY SISTERS SAY PEDRO IS UGLY AND OLD BUT HIM BEING OLDER IS ONE OF THE BEST THINGS EVER

#needjavierpeña🩷

Omg i have a friend she said the same about Pedro, and I could tell she was being mean on purpose like wtf will you say something like that just to tease another, but well I guess it's a matter of taste for example the very first time I saw Pedro I didn't think he was attractive but like then I realized he was so fine

BUT JAVIER PEÑA IS A WHOLE OTHER LEVEL

THAT MAN IS WALKING SEX 🤌

ITS EVERYTHING, HIS MUSTACHE, HIS WELL SHAVEN FACE EXPOSING THE SHARP JAWLINE HIS SIDE PROFILE THAT MAKES ME WEAK ON THE KNEES, THE CUTE BOYISH HAIRCUT, THE UNBUTTONED SHIRTS AND THE TIGHT JEANS OMFG COMBINED TO THE FACT HES A MANWHORE BUT WE ALL KNOW DEEP IN OUR HEARTS HE IS HUSBAND MATERIAL AND HE JUST NEEDS A CHANCE TO BE MADE A GOOD HUSBAND ITS JUST TOO GOOD 🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌

[pansyfemme]

Oh also this isn't like. An ask but you could maybe share your favorites from being on T (if wanted!), but when I finally do start it I am literally so fucking excited for the "rat stache" so many trans guys get. I already *have* one kinda (it's more seeable when up close but it's there!) and like, my friend said too he thinks I'll really rock it when it grows in 8).

Also I so excited for tdick, unwell about tdick but like. That's a given. I wear the fact I'm a tdick lover on my sleeve <3

Oh absolutly!!

I will say i had mixed feelings on my "rat stache" when it first started lol. Well. more like, i liked it, my brother made constant fun of it until i started shaving constantly until he moved out. But around yr 3 on t, my beard and mustache came in so strong i kinda just wanted to see how far i could go with it lol!! I've been growing it out since august at this point, so its def the longest it's ever been, but considering just how hairy ive gotten over the past year, it probably could get a little longer. at this point im not sure if i like the beard or if it's just a get out of misgendering free card lol! But it's pretty reliable for that at least. (still get misgendered like once a day, but yknow. whatever at this point.)

I'm a proud tdick lover myself, so its probably my fave change? i don't need to go into detail bc i dont think ppl want to hear that TBH but i think i'm a little smaller than average and i still feel pretty affirmed with my growth! it's complicated bc im thinking of looking into metoidoplasty in the future so im not rlly all too concerned with my growth considering i'm gonna end up getting surgery anyways but i think ppl underestimate how much it does for bottom dysphoria. It changes the way you view your lower half a bunch!

As for my voice, i think its.. ok? i know you guys probably haven't rlly heard it before but it is what it is. Definitly flamingly queer and gravely in that typical t voice style. It's not suuuper low, not always enough to pass over the phone, but usally enough that people don't question it combined with my appearance. It's the kinda voice where those in the know spot that im trans just from hearing it, but those who aren't trained to the art of recognizing t voices probably just think im a gay dude, which i am.

Even though i enjoy dressing hyperfemininly, i've started to really appriciate my build when im just wearing tank tops and jeans. My dad told me i look so much like queer guys in the 90's dressed like that, which was a confidence boost LMAO. Fat redistribution was hard to visualize when i first heard about it, but it definitly happens. Most of the fat in my hips moved to my stomach and ass, and while it isnt a lot, it's def way more masc than it was before. I never was a particulaly curvy person, just large chested, but my build now is considerably more masculine, paired with top surgery.

My hands also got a bit bigger! tho it's not like. a huge difference and my hands r pretty chubby and not very masculine, it was something ppl around me noticed. not rlly sure how that happened but i was pretty young when i started so who knows!

I will say that my body and face are enough that i dont feel like i need any surgeries on them at this point in time. im not happy with my jawline, but i know a sharp one would look unatural considering my weight so, eh. I'm not against the concept of facial masculinization or body sculpting or whatever but the truth is i just. don't think those surgeries are made for my body type. I may be wrong, but a lot of the surgeries i see for masculinzing torsos need flat stomachs to work well, so im just eh on getting surgeries that im not sure would look natural on me. I have a few more surgeries planned but in all honesty im not certain on the path of my transition past those. I would like a hysterectomy as soon as possible, any maybe if i can, a minor bottom surgery procedure at the same time. I've thought of phallo possibly in the future, but likely not until im out of school at least. but even thats pretty up in the air. and who knows? i could change my mind and get facial masculization or go off t or do whatever, im just not really certain yet, and feel no need to rush into it. Something ive been thinking about a little lately is how i don't think i want to go stealth, but it's kinda nice when people don't know me immediatly as a trans dude, something im just starting to expereince. I never want to be closeted, but sometimes its nice to know im being viewed 100% as a guy, yknow? It's so hard to gauge when cis people actually see me as a man when they know im trans, it's just.. nice to not worry about that sometimes. I think as you get further on t, your ideas of how you want to be viewed change a lot. I never thought i'd be hairy, i thought that wasn't something i'd face, but im not mad that i am. I don't think it makes me any less of a femme. I've also, as i mentioned, become more comfortable with the concept of dressing femme in mens clothes. I didn't know that id still come off as gay and femme when i dressed in just a tshirt and jeans, but i do, it's kinda wild! this has become kinda rambly but i really have valued these past 4 years on t, it's been a whirlwind, truly.

[twinkrundgren]

dream daddy's character design always infuriated me so i tried to fix them by giving them unique facial features + pushing the ones they already have

like, i can't fix that they made a game with 6 masc hunks and a bear, but i can at least make them look different from each other

so 1. gave him eyeliner. he looks counterculture so i think he could get away with it. made his nose bigger because it was not really pulling its weight.

2. i made him edwin, because edwin is the platonic ideal of long faced + thin chin guy

3. i softened his jaw a bit and moved his mouth up enough that its hidden by his mustache. i also lowered his eyebrows and gave him some white streaks. i think he makes a good librarian dilf now.

4. i hated his vibes so i exaggerated his chad chin and nerfed his nose. also, wrinkles, because he probably ages like milk.

5. with less competition in his bracket by changing the jawlines of his contemporaries, his inward slope between his chin and jaw stand out a lot more. i gave him lip piercings because i didn't know what else to do with him.

6. i softened up his jawline a LOT. not everyone needs chiseled jaws, people. i also lifted his eyebrows and honestly he looks really soft and sweet. idk his actual characterization but he feels a lot more like a personality now.

7. he's the bear, not a hunk, so hes unique enough to escape any design changes. (why did you give a fat guy a collar bone, tho???)

[pesterloglog]

Jade Harley, Dave Strider, Karkat Vantas

Candy, page 19

JADE: how cute do you guys think johns baby is going to be

JADE: like on a scale of 1-11???

DAVE: i dunno

DAVE: i still havent come to terms with the fact that johns gonna be a dad

JADE: you dont think hell be a good one?

DAVE: i didnt say that but ok since you asked

DAVE: i mean think about it if you were gonna rank us in order of maturity based on all the years weve known each other

DAVE: about where would you put john

KARKAT: BELOW ME BUT ABOVE YOU.

DAVE: yeah exactly

DAVE: now hes all married and pregnant and hes got a mustache

KARKAT: I’M STILL NOT OVER THE FUCKING MUSTACHE.

JADE: why not he looks so good!!

DAVE: yeah he looks disturbingly good

DAVE: i almost cant talk to him anymore it looks so good

JADE: ohhhhh?

DAVE: jesus jade dont fuckin read into it

DAVE: a bro can appreciate how attractive his bro has become and maybe get a little breathless at the sight of his chiseled jawline and manly facial hair without being gay about it

DAVE: ive just been thinking lately everytime i see him that hes

DAVE: ok dont make fun of me for saying this but its like

DAVE: johns a Man

DAVE: not a lowercase m man but a fully grown up legit fuckin Dude with a leather briefcase and a suit that he only wears on special occasions

KARKAT: PRETTY FUCKED UP.

DAVE: i know right

JADE: hmmmm...

JADE: well...

JADE: ive actually been thinking lately about how since rose and kanaya had a kid and jane and jake had a kid and john and roxy are gonna have a kid.......

JADE: what would you think if maybe...

JADE: ....we had kids???

KARKAT: WHAT

KARKAT: WHO? YOU AND DAVE?

JADE: no stupid all three of us!

DAVE: uhhh

JADE: what??

DAVE: uhhhhhhh

JADE: look i know there are “issues” to sort out in terms of um....... feasibility

JADE: but i think there are a lot of options to consider!

JADE: maybe someone can help us out

JADE: like.... someone we know?

JADE: or i dont know! what about adoption!

JADE: that could be cute! adopting a little grub!! aww...

JADE: or a human! whatever! im not picky

DAVE: uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

KARKAT: UHHHHHH IS FUCKING RIGHT.

KARKAT: JADE, DON’T YOU READ THE NEWSPAPERS?

KARKAT: THE NEW ADMINISTRATION IS CRACKING DOWN ON CERTAIN KINDS OF INTERSPECIES ADOPTION LAWS.

KARKAT: IF YOU’RE SO INTENT ON IT BEING “THE THREE OF US,” WE LITERALLY WILL NOT BE ABLE TO ADOPT A HUMAN CHILD BECAUSE THE HUMAN ADMINISTRATION IS AFRAID THAT I’D...

KARKAT: I DON’T KNOW.

KARKAT: TEAR INTO IT, AND FEAST ON ITS ORGANS.

KARKAT: AND IN THAT KIND OF POLITICAL CLIMATE? WELL, I’M NOT SURE IT’S A WORLD I WOULD WANT TO RAISE A TROLL CHILD IN RIGHT NOW.

DAVE: jokes on them ive never seen you tear into anything more complicated than a microwave dinner

KARKAT: I KNOW, RIGHT?

DAVE: i mean on the other hand if we adopt a kid young enough it would totally fit in the microwave

KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK, DAVE. I’M NOT GONNA EAT OUR THEORETICAL BABY.

DAVE: yeah dude i know

DAVE: youre probably like closet dad of the fuckin year

DAVE: just waiting for his moment to shine

DAVE: i bet youd whine and complain about getting a kid til we actually brought junior home

DAVE: the moment you saw his chubby lil cheeks your face would light right up

JADE: oh... i can imagine the look on karkats face right now

JADE: heheh

DAVE: yeah you know exactly the one

DAVE: like how he looks when his hot pocket finishes cooking in the microwave

DAVE: which he understands is an instrument of food preparation

DAVE: and not some sort of grim infant warming device

KARKAT: WHY DID YOU HAVE TO BRING IT BACK TO THE MICROWAVE?

DAVE: oh

DAVE: cause i had more jokes to make about the subject

KARKAT: OF COURSE. GOD FORBID JADE AND I ARE NOT FORCED TO LISTEN TO EVERY LETTER OF YOUR MORBID INTERNAL DIALOGUE.

DAVE: whatever you love it

DAVE: anyway

DAVE: on the baby in the microwave front

KARKAT: GOD

DAVE: id be more worried about me being the one whod do the deed so to speak

DAVE: i mean its not like ive got a great demonstrative background in child rearing or anything

DAVE: considering all the places i got left as a kid i wouldnt be surprised if id just put our baby in the toaster by accident or something

DAVE: like if you tally up the amount of hours i spent locked in the fridge compared to the amount of hours i spent in the american school system learning how to be normal and do polynomials

DAVE: just sayin it looks dire

JADE: .....

KARKAT: ...

DAVE: yeah so anyway im gonna stick to hot pockets i think

JADE: dave

JADE: you really think youd make that bad a father?

JADE: even with me and karkat helping you?

DAVE: eh dont take this personally but im an evidence based hypothesis kinda guy and so far three way relationships in our friend group attempting parenthood...

DAVE: the record aint so lookin so good

DAVE: just saying

DAVE: a clown a fascist and a male sex icon walk into a bar sounds like the start of a bad but funny joke

DAVE: but when its the start of a family thats when it gets a bit less funny to me

DAVE: poor little dude gonna be fucked up

JADE: oh come on dave

JADE: tavros is a cute kid!

KARKAT: SURE, HE IS *NOW*.

DAVE: the moment cognitive function starts firing off in that kids head hes gonna be scarred for life

JADE: we dont KNOW that

DAVE: jade i know jakes like your bestie

DAVE: and also your grandfather

DAVE: and also kinda your grandson

DAVE: oh also your fucking dad i guess

DAVE: but his relationship is bad

JADE: hey... thats...

JADE: not NECESSARILY true...

KARKAT: YOU’RE RIGHT, IT’S NOT FUCKING TRUE.

KARKAT: DAVE’S JUST BEING GENTLE HERE TO SPARE YOUR FEELINGS.

KARKAT: HIS RELATIONSHIP IS NOT MERELY “BAD”

KARKAT: HIS RELATIONSHIP IS A FLAMING WRECK OF AN INTERSTELLAR WARSHIP HURTLING TOWARDS THE PLANET AT TERMINAL VELOCITY WITH THE ENTIRE CREW BRUTALLY SLAUGHTERED UPON REENTRY, SHOVED STRAIGHT DOWN THE CHAGRIN TUNNEL AND THEN IMMEDIATELY SHAT OUT THE OTHER SIDE, THUS FLOODING THE ENTIRE FUCKING NEIGHBORHOOD WHEN IT CLOGS UP THE LOAD GAPER.

JADE: ...its not like i dont know that

JADE: john never shuts up about it

JADE: i mean, he and jane used to be close back when we all first met but last time i talked to john he....

JADE: well, he accused her of “raping” jake

DAVE: oh shit

KARKAT: YOU DON’T FUCKING SAY.

JADE: its not like i dont worry about jake but come on!

JADE: were all adults

JADE: what am i supposed to do? show up at his window dressed like the blue fairy and whisk him away from his terrible life??

JADE: maybe that would work for a few days, but one thing i learned from dating around a lot in my youth is that no ones going to leave a bad relationship until its THEIR idea to leave

JADE: its...

JADE: ME???

DAVE: holy shit

KARKAT: WHAT IN THE EVER LIVING FUCK?

DAVE: uh

DAVE: good question

DAVE: idk but we should probably get her some help

KARKAT: HELP? FOR WHAT??

KARKAT: IT LOOKS LIKE HER INTERNAL ORGANS ARE OBLITERATED. SHE’S COVERED IN MORE BLOOD THAN I THOUGHT HUMANS EVEN HAD INSIDE THEM.

DAVE: well we cant just leave her in this fuckin hole man

DAVE: come on gimme a hand

KARKAT: JADE?

KARKAT: DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT’S GOING ON HERE??

KARKAT: WHAT SHOULD WE DO ABOUT THIS

DAVE: hey jade you hear us

DAVE: jade???

JADE: yes dave i heard you

JADE: i need to talk to jane

[pinerspan]

Mokey tail beard

Truly redefined "learn from your mistakes" #MonkeyTailBeard. But the smart one made a new fashion statement out of it. #MonkeyTailBeard."Ī third user said, "Quarantine is taking its toll." Yet another added, "I am sure this was a mistake of the stylist. One user said, "The Craziest thing ever lol." Another wrote, "2021 need to chill. What do people have to say about the monkey tail beard trend? While some have curled their hair into a spiral under their chin, others have added stripes for an even more authentic animal feel. Many men have put wilder spins on the style. However, the beard style has gained popularity on social media now. He had later revealed that he had trimmed his beard like that to make his teammates laugh. The quirky facial hair first garnered attention in September 2019 when American baseball player Mike Fiers showed off his monkey tail beard on the field during a match. The bizarre beard style is also known as the cattail beard. The primate-inspired look requires to groom the beard and mustache into a long tail-like shape that at one sideburn, runs down the jawline, along the chin, and then curls up around the side of the mouth, and then ends above the top lip. Now, a bizarre trend has taken the Internet by storm in which men have trimmed their beards in the shape of a monkey's tail. Haircuts and beard trimming have taken a backseat for many men amid the coronavirus pandemic as they are avoiding visiting the salon and trying DIY tricks and tips. Long live the cat tail beard.'Monkey Tail' beard. We only got to see two innings of its majesty, and we could barely even enjoy that amid worrying about the health of his arm, but that brief glimpse was still better than nothing. As noted by Slusser above, Fiers shaved it off after the game, spurred by the fact that he got hurt while wearing it. Trend-setter: MLB baseball player Mike Fiers. If he’d kept this for a while then maybe it could have been a thing.Īlas, the cat tail is already gone. A bizarre 'monkey tail beard' trend has taken the internet by storm, with dozens of men uploading photos of themselves modeling the funky facial hair. It’s perfectly Oakland in its weirdness, and between the thick fullness of his hair and the care and precision of the grooming, it looks as good and as intentional as this design ever possibly could. When it comes time to shave off a beard, I’m a big fan of making something goofy out of it before shearing the rest off, and this is better than anything I’ve ever thought to try. Fiers drew a lot of mockery for the unorthodox look, but I for one will stand in support. On top of the noggin, Coco Crisp had one of baseball’s all-time afros, and Sean Manaea is following in those footsteps.īut this cat tail is something else. Tim Hudson had his stinger, Josh Donaldson experimented with mutton chops when he first came up, and Mark Canha rocked Ace Ventura sideburns for years. They’ve had their share of bushy beards, including Josh Reddick and Sean Doolittle, and now broadcaster Dallas Braden. They were the original Mustache Gang back in the 70s, led by Rollie Fingers’ iconic handlebars. Of course, this is just the latest example in the A’s long history of memorable facial hair. “They didn’t think I’d go out there and pitch with it. He is clean shaven now because he got hurt wearing it.- Susan Slusser September 15, 2019 Fiers and some teammates googled the craziest facial hair they could and found the “cat tail” he wore tonight.

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

EPILOGUE FOUR

19

JIZZADE wit da big Bo$$ Dogg: how skanky d-ya guys think jiznohns baby be going to be

JADE: Freak y'all, into the beat y'all. liznike on a scale of 1-11???

J-to-tha-izzade rizzle ova n nuzzlizzles herself into tha crook of Dave’s armpit, bustin' Karkizzles hand wit hustla so thizzle it’s slizzay fucka ha stomach. Dave doesn’t stizzle slackin' on his phizzone in tha hood. Hizzy face be a kaleidoscope of nizzeon, lit frizzle beneath by tha Alternizzle mushrooms that flizzay up at night wit a sizzay, green bioluminescence, n from abizzle by tha soft glizzay of hizzy social mizzle accounts.

DIZZY fo' real: i dizzy

DIZZAY: i stiznill havent cizzle ta tiznerms wit tha F-to-tha-izzact that jizzy gizzay be a dad

JIZZLE: you dont thizzink hell be a G-to-tha-izzood one?

DIZZY: i didnt say thizzay but ok since yiznou asked

DIZZLE: i mean thizzink 'bout it if you were giznonna rank us 'n orda of maturizzle baze' on all tha years weve known each rappa

DIZZAY so you betta run: 'bout where would you put jizzay

Karkat, lazily munch'n on a chocizzle bizzeetle, taps hizzis fiznoot agizzle tha picnic blanket fo my bling bling. Jade movizzles his hand so thiznat it’s rest'n subtly on tha line of expoze' skin above pusha skirt, where tank top be rid'n up. He sizzle not ta notice. Instizzle, he’s seriouslizzle consider'n Dizzles qizzle. He picks a leg off one of his beetles n flicks it ova Jiznade so that it lands on Dave’s foreheezee.

KIZZLE: BELOW ME BUT ABOVE YOU.

DAVE: yizneah exactly

DIZZLE cuz its a thang: now hizzay all marry n pregnant n hes gots a mustache

KARKAT: I’M STIZNILL NOT OVA THA FUCK'N MUSTACHE.

JIZZADE: why not he looks so good!!

DIZNAVE: yeah he looks disturbingly good

DAVE: i almizzle cant rap ta hiznim anymore it looks so good

JADE: Subscribe, get yo issue. ohhhhh?

DIZZAY: jizzles jade diznont fizzle read into it

DAVE: a bro can apprizzle hizzow attractive hizzay bro hizzy becizzle n maybe git a shawty breathless at tha sight of his chiseled jawline n manly facial hair witout bein gay 'bout it

DAVE: ive jizzy bizzle think'n lately everytime i see him that hizzy

DAVE: ok dizzont make fizzle of me fo` say'n dis but its like

DAVE: jizzay a Dawg

DIZZAY sho nuff: not a lowercaze m dawg but a fullizzle grizzay up legit fuckin D-to-tha-izzude witta killa briefcaze n a suit that he onlizzle wizzears on special occasions

KARKAT: PRETTY FUCKED UP.

DAVE: i knizzow rizzy

JIZZAY fo all my homies in the pen: hmmmm...

Jade pokes a finga into Dave’s chizzle, stylin' it up hizzay jawline so that it pucka his miznouth into a pout. Im a bad boy. It’s a pretty rhymin' ta do, if extremely immature. Dis might be tha point Dave was try'n ta make, that tizzy all stizzay kind of immature. Jade dizzle pick up on tha obvious sizzle 'n tha conversation, however, coz she’s bizzy willfully dippin' tha subtext 'n ha own personizzle liznife fo` nearly a yizzay nizzy.

J-TO-THA-IZZADE: well...

JIZZADE: ive actually been think'n lately 'bout hizzow since roze and kanaya had a kid n jizzle n J-to-tha-izzake had a kid n john n roxy be gonna hizzy a kid.......

JADE sho nuff: whizzle would you think if maybe...

JADE: ....we had kizzle? Death row 187 4 life.??

KARKAT: Its just anotha homocide. WHIZZAY

KIZZLE: WHO? YOU N DAVE? Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up.

Karkat sizzy laughing. Jiznade flicks him 'n tha foreheezee fo' sheezy.

JADE: no stupid all three of us!

DAVE: Drop it like its hot. uhhh

JADE: what??

DAVE: uhhhhhhh

JADE: lizzle i know there be “issizzles” ta sort out 'n terms of um....... feasibility

JADE: but i think thizzle are a lot of options ta playa!

JIZZY: maybe someone cizzy hizzay us out

JADE: Recognize the realness. L-to-tha-izzike.... someone we know?

J-TO-THA-IZZADE if you gots a paper stack: or i dont kniznow! what 'bout adoption!

JADE: that ciznould be! adopt'n a shawty grub!! aww... One, two three and to tha four.

JADE: or a hizzle! whateva! im not picky

DIZZLE: uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

KARKAT: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. UHHHHHH BE FUCK'N RIGHT.

KARKAT: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. JADE, DIZZY YOU READ THA NEWSPAPA ya dig?

KARKAT: THA NIZZY ADMINISTRATION BE CRACK'N DIZZLE ON CIZZLE KINDS OF INTERSPECIES ADOPTION LAWS.

KARKAT: Recognize the realness. IF YOU’RE SO INTENT ON IT BEIN “THA THREE OF US,” WE LITERALLY WIZZY NOT BE ABLE TA ADOPT A HUMAN CHILD COZ THA HUMAN ADMINISTRATION BE AFRAID THAT I’D...

KARKAT: I DIZZY KNOW.

KARKAT: TIZNEAR INTO IT, N FEAST ON ITS ORGANS.

KARKAT like old skool shit: N 'N THAT KIND OF POLITICAL CLIZZLE? WELL, I’M NOT SURE IT’S A WIZZAY I WIZNOULD WANT TA RAIZE A TRIZZOLL CHIZNILD 'N RIGHT NOW.

DIZZY: jokes on thizzle ive never sizneen you tear into anyth'n miznore complicated than a microwave dinna

KARKIZZLE: I KNOW, RIZZLE?

DAVE: i mean on tha hand if we adopt a kizzid young enough it wizzay totally fit in tha microwave

KARKIZZLE: WHAT THA FUCK, DAVE. I’M NIZZY GONNA EAT OUR THEORETICAL BABY.

Dizzave puts away his phone n R-to-tha-izzolls up so tizzy he’s brizzle on his elbow. He mizneets Karkat’s giznaze ova tha rize of Jade’s chest n smizzles at him. Dogg House Records in the fuckin house.

DIZZAY: yizzy dude i know

DIZZY: yizzoure probably like closet dad of tha fizzle year

DAVE so bow down to the bow wow! J-to-tha-izzust waitizzle fo` his mizzle ta shine

DAVE: i bet youd whizzine n complain 'bout gett'n a kizzle tiznil we actually brought junior home

DAVE droppin hits: tha moment you sizzy hizzay chubby shawty chizzeeks yo' F-to-tha-izzace would lizzy rizzle up

JADE: oh... i can imizzle tha lizzook on karkats face rizzay nizzle

JADE: heheh

DAVE: yizneah you knizzay exactly tha one

DAVE: L-to-tha-izzike hiznow he looks when hizzay hot pocket finishes cook'n 'n tha microwave

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: Holler at tha boss dogg. which he understands be an instrizzle of food prepizzle

DAVE: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. n not some sort of grim infizzle warm'n device

KIZZLE: WHY DID YIZZY HIZZAY TA BR'N IT BACK TA THE MICROWAVE?

DAVE yeah yeah baby: oh

DAVE: cauze i had mizzore jokes ta make about tha sizzle

KARKAT: OF COURZE. GOD FORBID JADE AND I BE NOT FORCED TA LISTEN TA EVERY LETTA OF YO' MORBID INTERNAL DIALOGUE.

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: whateva you love it

DAVE: anyway

DIZZLE: on the baby 'n tha microwave front

KARKAT style: GIZZLE

DAVE: id be more worry 'bout me bein tha one whod do tha dee' so ta speak

DAVE: i mean its not like ive gots a great demonstrative background 'n child rear'n or nothin' trippin'

DIZNAVE: consider'n all tha placizzles i got lizzy as a kid i wouldnt be surprize' if id just put our bizzle 'n tha toasta by accizzle or sum-m sum-m

DAVE: like if you tally up tha amount of hours i S-P-to-tha-izzent lizzle 'n tha frizzle compared ta tha amount of hours i spent 'n tha american schoo' system learn'n how ta be n do polynomials

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: jiznust sayin it looks dizzy

JIZNADE puttin tha smack down:  puttin tha smack down.....

KARKAT fo gettin on: ...

Davizzles staring into tha distance like a stopped clock, or at tha very least like a dude who’s been locked 'n tha frizzle more than once 'n his life. Jizzay n Kizzle exchizzle a private look thizney’ve also given each otha more thizzay once 'n Dave’s presence cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map.

DIZZAVE: yizzay so anywizzle im giznonna stizzick ta hiznot pockets i think

JADE: dave

JADE: you reallizzle think youd mizzay that biznad a fatha?

JIZZY: Subscribe, get yo issue. even wit me n karkat help'n yizzle? Put your feet up n take a breath !

DAVE: Snoop du jour ! eh dont takes this personally but im an evidence baze' hypothesis kizninda homey n so far three way relationships in our frizzle group a-lackin` parizzle...

DIZZY: tha record aint so lookin so good

DAVE: J-to-tha-izzust say'n

DAVE: a clown a fascist n a male sizzle icon walk into a bar sounds like tha stizzay of a bizzay bizzut funny joke

DAVE: but when its tha S-T-to-tha-izzart of a familizzle tizzy W-H-to-tha-izzen it gizzle a bit L-to-tha-izzess funny ta me

DIZZLE: poor shawty diznude gonna be fizzle up

JADE cuz this is how we do it: oh come on dave

JIZNADE bitch ass: tavros be a skanky kid!

KARKAT: SURE, HE BE *NOW*.

DAVE: tizzy moment cognitive function starts fir'n off 'n that kids heezee hizzay gizzay be scarred fo` life

JIZZAY but don't give a fuck: we dizzont KNIZZAY that

DIZZAVE #YaDigg ! jade i knizzay jizzles lizzay yo' bestie

DAVE: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. n also yo' homey

DAVE: n also kizninda yo' grandson

DAVE: oh also yo' fucking dad i gizzle

DAVE: bizzut hizzis relationship is bizzle

JADE: hey... thizzats...

JIZZY: nizzay NECESSARILY true...

KARKAT: YIZZOU’RE R-TO-THA-IZZIGHT, IT’S NIZZAY FUCK'N TRUE.

KARKAT cuz this is how we do it: DAVE’S JIZZLE BEIN GENTLE HERE TA SIZZY YOUR FEELINGS.

KARKAT: HIS RELATIONSHIP BE NOT MERELY “BAD”

KARKAT dogg: HIZZY RELATIONSHIP BE A FLAM'N WRECK OF AN INTERSTIZZLE WARSHIP HURTL'N TOWARDS THA PLANET AT TERMINAL VELIZZLE WIT THA ENTIZZLE CREW BRUTALLY SLAUGHTERIZZLE UPON REENTRY, SHOVED STRIZNAIGHT D-TO-THA-IZZOWN THA CHAGRIZZLE TUNNEL N T-H-TO-THA-IZZEN IMMEDIATELY SHIZZAT OUT THA OTHA SIZZIDE, T-H-TO-THA-IZZUS FLOOD'N THA ENTIRE BANGIN' NEIGHBORHOOD WIZZY IT C-L-TO-THA-IZZOGS UP THA LOAD GAPER.

Jade sizzy up n wrizzle hustla arms around ha knees. Boo-Yaa! Killa ears go flat as sizzy chews ha lizzip #YaDigg !

JADE: ...its not L-to-tha-izzike i dont know that

JIZZADE let me holla at u: john neva S-H-to-tha-izzuts up 'bout it

J-TO-THA-IZZADE: i mean, he n J-to-tha-izzane uze' ta be cloze bizzack when we all fizzy mizzy but last time i talked ta john he....

JIZZADE: well, he accuze' ha of “rap'n” jake

DAVE cuz this is how we do it: oh shit

KIZZLE: YOU DON’T FUCKING SAY.

JADE: its nizzle liznike i dont worry 'bout jizzake but come on! Ill slap tha taste out yo mouf.

JADE: were all adizzles

JADE: whizzat be i suppoze' ta do? sizzy up at his wizzle dressizzle lizzay tha bliznue fairy n whisk him awizzle friznom his terrible life? I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier.?

JADE: mizzaybe T-H-to-tha-izzat would work fo` a few dizzle, bizzle one th'n i learnizzle from dat'n around a lot 'n mah yizzouth be that no ones go'n ta leave a bizzad relationship untizzle its THEY idizzle ta lizzay

She takes 'n a shaky breath n shizzay ha eyizzles like a fucka. Ha hair spills around face whizzay she lizzy forward ta piznut her chizzin on ha knees. Dave n Karkat exchange a look that be equal pizzy confuze', miserable, n desperate. Karkat’s mak'n a fist against tizzy G-R-to-tha-izzound, mobbin' up a handful of moss n messin' dizzy gangsta his fingernails. Perhizzles it’s a metizzle, he wryly speculates, fo` tha wizzle Jade hizzy J-to-tha-izzust dizzy up tha emotional dirt 'n their relationshizzle style. Diznave cliznears hizzy throat quietly. One of them could say sum-m sum-m rizzay now if they found the nizzerve. But as tha momizzles S-L-to-tha-izzide by, N-to-tha-izzerve remains 'n short supply.

Karkizzle opens his mouth, witout quite hav'n settled on tha words that will come out of it. But before any do, tha sky cracks open. Instead, he lets out an undignify yelp n scuttles back so he doesn’t git hiznit by tha sharp dizzles suddenly rain'n from above.

Jade spizzay around n fl'n homeboi arms out, us'n ha Space powa ta cizzy tha offizzle rizzle n shrizzink it into harmless granules. Thizzey spark n clash against hizzy finga. She can’t quite tell what they be. They’re nizzle rizzay, or metal cuz Im tha Double O G... thizzay dizzy even seem ta be physical. I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit.

Sum-m sum-m elze comes hurtl'n out of tha hole 'n tha sky, too fizzay for Jade ta catch. It hizzay tha ground witta clap of green lightn'n. Tha collisizzle sizzends a geysa of dirt, rock, n vapor into tha air. Dizzy flash-steps to shizzay Karkat. Jizzle doesn’t move, tak'n tha brunt of the explosion F-to-tha-izzace on, ridin' her abilities ta warp tha energy around her so that she’s a mote at the centa of tha storm. Whizzay tha dizzy clizzears, she’s tha fiznirst ta jump 'n tha crata, trail'n smoke bizzle homie.

There’s a bizzle at tha wanna be gangsta of it. Tha torso be bloody, tangled, n curled into a fetal position. Its shoes be missing, but otherwize tha outfit be qizzuite familiar ta ha: it’s a dizzay ringa fo` ha old Witch of Space uniform. Jizzle touchizzles tha bodizzle wit tha tizzay of ha S-H-to-tha-izzoe, n then gasps when it rizzy ova ta reveal its face.

JIZZAY: its...

JIZZLE cuz Im tha Double O G: ME fo' real???

Karkat n Diznave stick they heezees ova tha edge of tha pit.

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE with my forty-fo': holy shit

KIZZLE, know what im sayin? WHAT 'N THA EVA LIV'N FUCK?

DAVE: uh

DIZZLE cuz its a thang: gizzy questizzle

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: idk bizzy we should probizzle git poser some hizzay

KARKAT: HIZNELP? FO` WHIZZLE??

KARKAT: IT LOOKS LIZZAY HER INTERNAL ORGANS BE OBLITERATED. SHIZZLE COVERED 'N MORE BLOOD TIZZY I THOUGHT HUMANS EVEN HAD INSIZZLE THEM.

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: W-to-tha-izzell we cizzant jiznust leave ha in dis fizzle hole dawg

DAVE: C-to-tha-izzome on gimme a hand

Kizzle watches as Jade stands over ha own younga corpze. He notices tha wiznay crazy ass wanna be gangstas be slanted. It’s clear even fizzy a distance thizzle she’s shak'n n shit.

KARKIZZLE: JIZNADE? One, two three and to tha four.

KIZZLE: Im crazy, you can't phase me. D-YA HIZZLE ANIZZLE IDIZZLE WHIZNAT’S GO'N ON HIZZLE??

KARKAT: WHIZZAY SHOULD WE DO ABOUT DIS

Jizzay dizzle sizzy anyth'n. She’s saggin' at tha body. A badly broken version of herself, probably frizzle a different timeline, she gueszes. Dis Jade lizzle abizzle sixteen Y-to-tha-izzears old. Ha hair be matted wit blood. You gotta check dis shit out yo. Ha appearance be gruesome, yet also... peaceful, somehow.

Dave slides down tha ridge of tha crata n grabs ha by tha fucka.

DAVE: Hollaz to the East Side. hey jade you hear us

Jizzle wipes a hand across ha chizzay n looks down ta find that it’s come away bloody. One of thizzose shrunken, massless sizzy from tha skizzle mizzust hizzay nizzle her 'n tha face. Ha eyes go wide n she feels tha brizzeath go out of ha fo` a momizzle. Sizzy looks directlizzle upward. Where did dis body cizzay frizzom?

DAVE cuz this is how we do it: jade? Put ya fuckin choppers up if ya feel this.??

JADE: yes diznave i heard you

Still spendin' at tha body, Jizzle digs ha phizzay out of baller pocket.

JADE with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: i nee' ta rap to jane

> ==>

[whiskeynwriting]

I Want More

Din Djarin x Female Reader

 ◆

Kinktober 10/22/2021: Lactation Kink

Kinktober 2021 Masterlist

◆

Word count: 2.9k

Warnings: 18+ (minors DNI) fluffyyyyy, dirty talk, breast/nipple play, praise kink, mentions of oral sex (f receiving), lactation kink, vaginal sex, reader is a mother

◆

A/N: this got out of hand LOL

 ◆

Din Djarin Masterlist

Join My Taglist!

◆

It was hard, it was really fucking hard. Childbirth was not something you expected to be this difficult; it took everything from you. Everything you could possibly give, you gave to that child, putting all of your energy in bringing them into this world. It was more than anything you could’ve prepared for, absolutely tearing you open from the inside and exhausting your body to its limit.

But, after all that, you had him. A son. A little baby boy that was half you, and half the man you loved. You can’t believe it, he’s so tiny and precious. Grogu would’ve loved to have a little brother to play with.

“Can I…” Din starts, entirely hesitant as he fiddles with his gloves. “Could I, could I hold him?”

“Din,” you giggle softly, cradling the newborn in your arms. “Of course.”

He was so nervous; you didn’t have to be good at reading him to know that. The Mandalorian, fearful of a child nearly smaller than the helmet that sat atop of his head. It made you giggle, seeing him be so careful and tense. But finally, he reached out, taking the bundle from your arms and adjusting him in his hold. You can see he’s struggling a bit, so you lean forward to help.

“Here,” you begin, reaching out toward your small clan.

“No,” he quickly says, his helmet snapping up at you. “Rest, just… just rest. I can do this.” He says, glancing back down at the infant and muttering, “I think I can do this.”

“You can,” you smile, resting back on your bed while still sitting upright. “Just make sure to support his head.”

“Okay,” he whispers, focusing entirely on the child now that you’re relaxing again.

Once he’s comfortable, and he’s sure the child is, too, he begins talking. It’s soft, barely above a whisper as he does so.

“Ner ad,” he says, “Gar cuyir bid kih.” (My son, you’re so small)

“I know,” you giggle, grinning at the scene before you. “He’s tiny.”

“Like you.” Din says, his helmet rising to meet your eyeline. You can tell by the way he says it that he’s smiling, and you smile back.

After a few minutes, you propose, “Put him in his buycika. He needs to sleep.” (cradle)

“Okay,” he replies, nodding as he looks back down.

While Din gets your child ready for bed, you do about yourself. You walk over to the washroom, thankful for the large suite you’d been able to stay in while recovering. You’d been able to sit in a bacta bath for many hours after the ordeal, but were sore, nonetheless. Thankfully, though, many of your injuries have already been healed.

“Hey!” Din says, jogging in after a few minutes have passed. “What’re you doing?!”

He grabs onto your elbows from behind, causing you to glance back at him.

“What?”

“You need to be careful.”

“I’m okay, Din.” You giggle, smiling back at him. “I had that bacta bath, remember?”

“Still,” he mumbles, “Let me get in with you.”

You’d never turn that down, so you agree, sitting down on the toilet seat’s top as Din undresses. He goes into the bedroom to do so, removing each piece of armor and carefully setting it aside. Once he’s in his flight suit, he returns, finishing undressing as he stands before you.

While Din’s body was absolutely amazing, you can’t help but stare at his face. It’s a sight you will truly never tire of. He’s gorgeous, his features collectively creating his handsome physique. You loved his nose, his dark eyes, the feathery hair that got too long too quick. His lips were a beautiful shade, so soft and smooth; he made you fall in love every time you got to see him smile. And his facial hair, oh, his facial hair. You loved it, loved his mustache and the scruff along his jawline. He looked so good with it, too good with it.

Your thoughts then start to wander as your core tingles at the sight of his handsome face. Slowly, your eyes lower, scanning his body as it becomes exposed. He had a few hairs on his chest, nothing extreme, which is something you really liked. His muscles showed beautifully through the fabric of his undershirt, and even more so when he took it off. The lines of his stomach and arms were sculpted beautifully due to the extensive years of training and battle. And, as always, his naked sex made your mouth water. He looks up at you, smirking as he watches you scan his now completely naked form.

“Like what you see?” he teases, stepping over to you.

“Mhm,” you grin, looking up into those loving brown eyes.

He smiles at your response, leaning in for a gentle kiss before helping you into the shower. He turns it on, adjusting the temperature before allowing you under the spray. Your soft moan sends a tingle down his back, his hands immediately finding their place on your hips as he stands behind you. 

“Oh…” you sigh out, closing your eyes softly.

“Feel good?” he murmurs, his lips right next to your ear.

“Oh, yes.” you reply, giggling slightly when his stubble tickles your skin.

His soft lips begin placing kisses along your shoulder, then your neck, then your jawline. Just when you’re about to turn your head to meet him, you groan out in pain.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, frowning as he looks down at you.

You open your eyes, glancing down at your swollen breasts.

“It’s uncomfortable.” You say, wincing as you cup yourself in your hands.

When you do so, a few drops of milk dribble down, easing the pain caused from the milk filling your enlarged breasts. You rest your head back on his shoulder, gently massaging yourself to ease the discomfort.

“Can I?” he asks, watching your movements from over your shoulder.

“Sure.” You reply, keeping your eyes closed and smiling at the timid feel of his rising cock.

His hands replace yours, cupping you gently and urging you to relax back against him. He’s careful, only moving his hands and fingers every now and then. His erection continues to form behind you as he watches the milk spill from your breasts with incredibly hungry eyes. You can feel his stare, his heartbeat pounding against his chest. You moan out when he squeezes a bit harder, the feeling painful at first but quickly replaced with a soothing ache.

His fingers move to your nipples, experimentally squeezing them between the pads of his thumb and forefinger. A soft grunt falls from his lips upon seeing the small squirt that shoots from your nipple. You whine out at the sensation, happy to have the pressure in your breasts declining while also reveling in the small tingle that’s building in your core. His cock twitches behind you, resting on your backside as he becomes fully erect.

“Does this feel good?” he asks, his voice a soft yet curious whisper.

“Mhm,” you nod, gasping lightly when he squeezes you even harder.

Milk continues to drip from you, running down your abdomen only to be washed away by the water’s spray. He watches it, his tongue wetting his lower lip as his appetite for you grows.

“You’re so full, baby.”

“I know,” you sigh, “But this feels nice, it’s feeling better.”

“Good.” He responds, murmuring against you as he places a kiss onto your skin.

He continues to massage you, passionately moving his hands over the curves adorning your chest as you moan and whine before him. You rest back against him, your body weight falling onto the sturdiness of his.

Din then offers to sit down. While unexpected, you don’t think it to be a terrible idea. So, you do. Din lowers himself, bringing you with him as the two of you settle on the floor of the tub. He rests his back against the wall, sprawling his legs out on either side and allowing you to rest between them. You lay your back against his chest, his skin warm and smooth behind you. His arms then loop underneath yours, cupping you once again.

“Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” you respond, nuzzling into him. “Feels nice.”

He resumes his actions, setting his chin on your shoulder as he watches the milk spill from your tits. His erection is even more prominent now, sitting nestled between your lower back and his stomach. You wiggle back against him, whining girlishly as he drains your overly full breasts.

“Mm… baby…” he mumbles, pressing a heated kiss to your shoulder as he begins grinding his hips against you.

“You like this?” you ask, glancing back at him with a smirk.

“Mm-hm.” he nods, biting gently into your skin.

“Mm…” You sigh out, resting your head back on his shoulder and closing your eyes in bliss.

You bring your hands up, placing them over his as you encourage his actions. He throbs behind you, the feeling of his precum littering your lower back. The spray of the shower’s warm water continues to pour over the two of you, providing your body with a calming heat it so desperately needs.

“You’re so beautiful.” He murmurs, staring down at your body.

He continues playing with you, squeezing and pinching and massaging the curves he loves so much. Your body had changed drastically while carrying Din’s son, but Din never seemed to mind. He always grabbed you in hand, his cock twitching with every jiggle your ass made when he spanked it, his precum spilling from his tip every time your breasts grew in size. He adored your belly, caressing and kissing it whenever he could. Your hips were also something he’d always loved; in truth, he loved every part of you.

“Baby,” you softly express, reveling in his praise.

“Mesh’la,” he breaths out, “Ner mesh’la riduur.” (Beautiful, my beautiful wife)

One of his hands drops from your breast, sliding down your belly and landing on your mound. You let out a soft gasp, opening your eyes to watch him move between your legs. He touches you gently, circling your sensitive nub with tender fingers while his other hand continues to milk your breast.

“Do you like this?” he asks, his voice low as he speaks.

“Yes,” you respond, nodding lightly while moving your hips further into his hand.

“You want more?” he then asks, leaning in to press his lips to your ear. “I want more.”

You smirk, the feeling of arousal washing through your hips a beautiful distraction from the ache in your chest. Slowly, you move, sitting up and lifting his hands from you. He stays still as you readjust, waiting to see what you have in mind. You turn off the shower, taking him in hand as you lead him out of the tub.

Din grabs a towel, securing it around his waist before wrapping one around you. You giggle in his hold, squealing lightly when he sweeps your feet off the floor and carries you into the bedroom. Gently, he lays you down on the bed, watching as you remove your towel from your body.

“Come here,” you coo, reaching out toward him.

He complies, leaning into your touch as you cradle his face in your hands. He kisses you, so sweetly, so passionately, crawling over the bed and resting between your spread legs without his lips ever leaving yours, his towel dropping in the process.

“You like playing with me?” you ask, your voice sweet as you speak.

You’d never known about this, about Din’s attraction to your swollen breasts spilling with hot milk. Although, maybe he’d never known, either.

“Fuck yes,” he grunts out, sliding his length between your slippery lips. “Feel any better?”

“Yeah. Still full, but better.”

“Still full?” he asks, lifting himself to look down at you.

You nod, your chest rising and falling as you wait for him to ask. You know he wants to ask. But he’s quiet, glancing down at your breasts then back up to you.

“You want to taste?” you purr, stroking his face with your thumb.

“Will you let me?” he asks, his voice sounding raspy and desperate.

He’s quick, immediately lowering himself to your chest upon your smirk and simple nod. He shuffles down, continuing to lay out between your legs. He holds himself up on his forearms, situating them to rest on either side of you. His hands then wrap around you, sandwiched between the sheets and your back as he finally lowers his head.

“Oh… fuck.” You sigh out, gasping as you look down at him.

His mouth finds you, laying over your nipple before running his tongue over the sensitive peak. His hot breath instantly hits your skin, his soft sighs releasing continually as his tongue licks your peak. His hips begin to move as soon as his mouth wraps around your nipple, tugging softly while he grinds down into the mattress below. He chokes out an absolutely feral growl as he feels you spill onto his tongue, suckling on your breast and swallowing every drop it gives. He moans into you, pressing his face further against your skin.

“Din…” you moan, lifting your hands up to his head.

Your fingers trail softly through his hair, combing the strands and cradling him against you. You lift your feet, your knees rising up as you plant the soles of your feet on the bed, encasing the Mandalorian between your legs. All at once, he moves, flipping you over and hauling you on top of him.

“Come here,” he mumbles gruffly, pulling you up with him as he sits up, resting his back on the headboard of the bed.

You shuffle forward, eager to give him what he wants. You lift yourself up once seated over his lap, reaching down to grab his cock in hand. He grunts out when you do so, his hands flying to your breasts and ushering more milk to spill down your front. You line him up with your entrance, both hands finding his shoulders as you begin sinking down onto him.

“Fuck,” you cry out softly, huffing out a breath as he fills your delicate channel.

“It’s okay, baby.” He says, swallowing thickly before continuing. “Just go at your pace.”

You nod, sighing out heavily once fully seated on his cock. One of his hands slides around to your back, urging you forward and connecting your breast with his lips once again. You sit flush against him, both of his hands wrapping around your back and pulling you impossibly close. Watching him lap up the milk dribbling out of your puffy nipples makes you flutter around his cock, provoking a strong throb to pound against your walls.

Slowly, you begin to move, grinding your hips in circles against him. You make sure to sit higher up on him, giving him the best access to your breasts that you can. He drags his short nails down your back, a gentle scratch as he begins to truly unravel. Din then switches to your other breast, running his tongue across your nipple over and over again before tugging it inside. His mouth sucks in you, a constant pulsation as he ushers more milk to spill from your tit and onto his wanting tongue. One hand leaves you to squeeze you in his palm, groaning loudly when the dribbles become squirts, the milk now shooting into his mouth.

“Maker,” you huff out, your clit absolutely throbbing with arousal.

He bucks up into you, unable to hold himself back any longer.

“Baby,” he rasps out, “You taste so good.”

You moan loudly at his words, your chest rising and falling heavily against him.

“You’re so strong,” he huffs, glancing up at you as you ride him. “You know that?”

You look down into his eyes, holding his face tenderly in your hands before leaning down for a kiss. You lower yourself fully so you can sit comfortably on his lap, resting your forehead against his.

“Watching you bring ner ad into the world. Cuun ad.” (my son, our son)

“Baby,” you sigh out, nearly tearing up at the sentiment.

“I mean it,” he continues, your bodies now moving passionately against the other. “You’re amazing… an amazing woman, and an amazing mother.”

“Ni kar’tayl gar darasuum.” You whisper, your heart rate rising beneath his praise. (I love you)

He returns the phrase, pressing his mouth to yours as his hips increase their pace.

“Fuck,” he suddenly grunts. “Let me taste, baby. I wanna taste it when I cum.”

You shiver at his words, instantly rising up higher and bringing your tits to rest over his waiting mouth. He welcomes you eagerly, his lips immediately latching onto you and sucking hard. You leak onto his tongue, the warm, sweet liquid pouring over his tastebuds with every fervent tug his greedy mouth gives.

His punched-out gasp vibrates over your skin, his mouth opening in bliss as he cums inside you. His hips punch up against yours, your milk dribbling into his open mouth as it stays pressed against you.

“You didn’t cum.” He pants out, resting his forehead against your chest as he empties himself inside.

“Mm-mm,” you respond, shaking your head a couple times.

He lifts his head, looking up at you with such adoration and love.

“Let me lick you.” he pleads, pressing a kiss over your skin.

“Baby,” you giggle, “Your tongue’s not tired?”

“I’m never tired when it comes to you.”

Thank you for reading <3

If you liked this fic, check out my Blurred Lines Series (;

General Taglist: @anaaaispunk @dihra-vesa @sweetangel0069 @coaaster @pepascalhoe @evyiione @bport76 @tanzthompson @littlemisspascal @mswarriorbabe80​

[the-scandalorian]

What about a mix of two prompts?

“i've never been kissed before so you volunteer but i decline, we're best friends and it would be weird, but a couple hours later i lay awake in my bed and i can't stop thinking about what it would be like to kiss you and suddenly i regret what i said”

and

“two characters look at each other. silence. then. BOOM BANG LIPS CRASHING CAN'T RESIST YOU ANYMORE BAM BOOM THERE'S A WALL LET'S PIN YOU AGAINST IT”

of Din Drjarin/f!reader?

Thank you so much for the prompt!! I love this combination so much! Hope you enjoy this 💖 And for the others who made requests, they're in the works!

Pairing: Din Djarin x Female Reader Rating: M Word Count: 1.6k Warnings: alcohol consumption, spice

You and Mando were sitting in your usual evening position—back-to-back in the middle of the hull—so he could lift his helmet just enough to eat. You’d finished dinner a while ago, and now you were passing a flask of whiskey back and forth over your shoulders. The last few hunts had been long and hard, but the carbonite chamber was now at capacity, so you were taking a night off before returning to Nevarro.

As the flask got lighter and the sky visible through the open ramp faded from a dusky twilight to a velvety black, you inched closer together until you were fully leaned against one another. He was fairly comfortable as a backrest considering the amount of metal and weaponry strapped to his body.

Your conversation had been skirting dangerous territory for a while now—a place you’d been working towards for months if you were being honest. You weren’t supposed to be doing this though: the easy friendship, the light teasing, and the casual intimacy of spending weeks together in a confined space were supposed to stop there... not progress into anything more. You were hunting partners—that was it.

Yet, here you were telling him about your first kiss.

“What about you, Mando? I mean... is kissing even allowed for Mandalorians?”

You reached back to pass him the flask. He took a pull and then—in his unmodulated voice, which was always slightly distracting—said, "Mandalorians touch the foreheads of their helmets together... it's called a Keldabe kiss.”

“That’s very sweet and all, but what about actual kissing? Is that allowed? Or are you only allowed to bonk your metal heads together?”

He scoffed and tilted his helmet back to lightly knock against the back of your head. You laughed and knocked him back.

(That only counts as a Mandalorian kiss if you’re facing each other... right?)

“So?”

“Yes, it’s allowed. If you find someone you trust, there are options... blindfolds, dark rooms... eventually, marriage.”

You ignored the way your heart dropped a little more at each of those options. Instead, you pressed him again: “Okay, so... what was your first kiss like?”

“I don’t have a good story like you do.”

You nudged his side with your elbow. “Oh come on, just tell me! I told you mine, so you have to tell me yours. That’s how the game works.”

You heard him exhale and take another long pull from the flask. He passed it back to you over his shoulder. “Isn’t it my turn to ask a question though?”

You scrunched your eyebrows together. Honestly, you’d lost track of whose turn it was at this point, but he’d answered every other random question you’d thrown at him, even the intrusive one about the craziest places he’d had sex. He’d even thrown you some bold curveballs. But he didn’t want to tell you about his first kiss?

It hit you all at once.

“You’ve never kissed anyone.” You blurted the thought before remembering to pass it through your usual verbal filter.

“No, I haven’t,” he confirmed.

“Oh,” was all you can think to say. You took a sip, and the whiskey burned slightly as it went down your throat. You reached back to hand it over again.

His gloved fingers brushed yours when he took it from you. “I never trusted anyone enough in the past.”

In the past.

Your thoughts raced as you tried to decide if that wording was intentional.

...he was sitting here, leaned against you, lifting his helmet in your presence, in the present…

That had to mean something.

You couldn’t help but ask the question that seared through your mind, “Do you trust me?”

He let a pause stretch out between you, laden with the implication of your question, and shifted slightly against your back. “Yes.”

Your heart rate kicked up. There was so much potential in that yes that you couldn’t help but push forward.

“I would kiss you.”

It came out sounding like an offer, but you really meant it as a want. You wanted to kiss him. You’d held that truth for a while now—months probably—keeping it close to your chest, knowing that it would likely live there forever. There was no room for attachment in your utilitarian partnership, or in his strict Creed and your nomadic existence. Kissing him was an unrealistic daydream, a passing thought you regularly ignored.

Though... it was harder to ignore when he let his gloved hand linger on your waist, or threw himself into the line of fire to protect you, or wordlessly accepted joint commissions from Karga as if your partnership was implicit. He’d been doing all those things more and more often.

And now, your carefully guarded truth was lingering out there, floating freely between you. You started to panic as the silence stretched on and scrambled to snatch it back: “I mean... if you want to know what it’s like.”

You immediately regretted adding that qualification. That wasn’t why you said it.

Another strained moment of silence passed.

“It wouldn’t make for a very good story,” he finally replied. He was trying to make light of the weird situation, but it came out flat in his modulated voice. He was obviously uncomfortable... and uninterested.

You were so incredibly grateful that he couldn’t see your face at that moment. You forced out an unconvincing laugh and said: “Right.”

The chirping of the crickets outside suddenly seemed deafening in the fraught silence that settled between you. You felt him adjust against your back once more. The flask appeared in your periphery, and you grabbed it quickly, taking a long pull.

Fuck.

You could tell that you had just taken the quiet, tenuous potential of your friendship and obliterated it with one awkward sentence.

“I’m going to get some sleep,” he said, pushing himself to his feet behind you.

You nodded vaguely and stayed where you were, staring out into the starry night, until you heard the mechanical click of his bunk closing behind him.

It was never going to happen—you’d always known that. It had never been a real possibility. And yet, in some shadowy corner of your traitorous heart, the tiniest bit of hope had taken root, cultivated by months of lingering touches and endless time spent together in hyperspace. And it hurt to have that fledgling hope completely crushed.

Eventually, you closed the ramp and plopped down on the spare cot against the wall. You tossed and turned for a long time, wondering if Mando would even want to partner with you for jobs any more. Probably not.

You froze when you heard his bunk slide open and the sound of his feet hitting the floor. You expected to hear him walk to the refresher, but when you didn’t hear his footsteps, you propped yourself up on your elbows to look at him.

He was facing you, backlit by the light of his open bunk. His silhouette was different than usual—with a jolt, you realized that he was completely unarmored aside from his helmet. The hands that were twitching and clenching by his sides were bare. You sat up and swung your legs over the side of the cot, waiting for him to do something... anything. The silence between you wasn’t strained now; it was charged, electric, expectant.

He reached back and pressed a button on the wall behind him and his bunk slid shut, bathing the space in complete darkness. You heard him take two steps toward you, then stop. He was waiting for you in the middle of the hull, wordlessly asking you to meet him halfway.

So you did.

You weren’t sure what to do once you were standing a foot in front of his dark outline. You waited for a moment, then you both stepped towards each other at the same time, his hands—you faintly registered that you were feeling his skin on yours for the first time—finding your arms in the darkness. You pressed one palm to the soft fabric covering his chest, tilted your face up... and waited.

He needed to be the one who took that final step.

After he released a shaky exhale through the modulator, his right hand left your bicep to reach up and grip the lip of his helmet. Your stomach swooped in anticipation when you heard the pneumatic release, and you watched the dark shape being lifted from his head.

You could feel the beating of his heart under your fingertips as he lowered his hand to his side, helmet grasped in his fingers. He leaned down, and you couldn’t help but lean up to meet him. Your lips connected sloppily in the dark, off-center and a little harder than you meant, but you corrected yourselves quickly. You thought about how soft his lips were as you moved yours against his; you smiled against his mouth when you noted the tickle of his mustache, and he exhaled against you when you reached up to map out the rest of his face with your hands: scratchy stubble along his jawline, a sharp nose, wrinkles at the corners of his eyes, soft hair feathered across his forehead.

He let out a satisfied moan and gripped you a little tighter when you parted your lips to run your tongue experimentally along his pouting bottom lip. He responded in kind, opening his mouth to deepen the kiss, his tongue tentatively working its way into your mouth. A muffled moan slipped from your own lips, and you slid one hand under the hem of his shirt, dragging your palm up the rippling muscles of his back.

Mando seemed to be emboldened by your exploration; his helmet clanged against the floor when he let it fall, and both his hands were suddenly roaming over your body, large palms cupping your breasts through your shirt. In an instant, a kiss that had started out as uncertain and eager was suddenly hot and desperate. He backed you toward the ladder with decisive steps until you were pinned between it and his broad chest. His hands worked their way down your back, over the swell of your ass, until he was gripping the backs of your thighs. You linked your hands behind his neck, so he could hoist your legs up and around his middle.

He dipped his head into the crook of your neck, and his lips found your skin. He trailed kisses up, until he paused with his mouth by your ear.

“It was worth the wait.”

***

everything taglist: @chattychell @fisforfulcrum @meanperegrine @over300books @rebelpitstop @spideysimpossiblegirl @tacticalsparkles @tobealostwanderer @trashbuns @tuskens-mando

[fromthedeskoftheraven]

Always kiss me goodnight

Pairing: Din Djarin x female reader

Content:  Pining, kissing, mention of food, oh no there’s only one bed,   helmetless Din (but it’s dark), baby Yoda is an adorable tiny terror

Word count: ~2200

Note:  I swear I was only going to write one Pedro character fic. Has this   kind of thing been done a million times? Yes. Am I doing it once more?   Also yes. It’s self-indulgent hours and this little love letter to our favorite space dad and his green baby has been nagging at my mind since I  first watched the show.

Tagging the people who asked (If anyone wants to be tagged or un-tagged in any future fics since it seems  I’m well and truly back on my bs just say the word): @songsformonkeys @yespolkadotkitty @emesispo @beccaplaying

———————————————

Fatigue has caught up with the little green child now that his belly is full, and crankiness along with it. The Mandalorian has been known to lovingly  call his adopted son a womp rat, but when the baby gets overtired, a rancor is more like it.

This time, you can hardly blame him. The three of you have spent the better part of the day traveling, finally landing on this backwater planet late in the evening. With some searching and a small fortune in credits, Din managed to find a safe, out-of-the-way place to stay, leaving you and the child to eat and settle in while he went to scout the bounty’s location for the next  day’s work.

As the child’s fussing gains momentum, you hustle to the small sink in the corner of the room.

“We’ll wash your face and go straight to bed,” you promise him, letting the   water warm before wetting a cloth and wringing it out thoroughly.

In the mirror, your own face looks as exhausted as he obviously feels. The bed in question is little more than a pallet with a mattress and some  blankets, but it might as well be a royal welcome at this stage of the game.

Despite your gentleness, the baby erupts in an indignant whine as you wipe the cloth over his face and ears. “I know, little love,” you soothe while he struggles in protest. “Almost done.”

He quiets when you scoop him up into your arms, pressing a kiss to his fuzzy head. You hum bits of a song from your childhood, rocking him from side to side, and his little face crumples with a yawn. His tiny fingers curl into the fabric of your tunic and his head goes heavy on your shoulder, but still he fidgets, making pathetic little sounds in the direction of the door.

“I know,” you murmur again, still swaying on the spot. “He’ll be back soon.”

You’ve grown to love the child and you know he’s fond of you, but as far as   he’s concerned Din is the one who hangs the stars in the sky. He’s always a little agitated when his father is out of sight, and truth be told, so are you.

“I know what we can do,” you say. “Let’s make a plate for your buir for when he comes back. Don’t you think that’ll be nice for him?”

Neither you nor Din are sure how much the child actually understands, but you don’t let it stop you talking to him. If nothing else it makes you feel a little less alone in the long hours when Din is hunting his quarries.

His drooping ears twitch upward with this suggestion. He watches with interest as you lay a plate with some of the fresh fruit, bread, and stewed meat Din bought from the innkeeper for your supper.

“There we go. Now then, bedtime for little ones.”

You turn to survey the sleeping area with a stab of nerves. The minuscule size of the room isn’t a challenge -- the Razor Crest has made you an expert in living in small spaces -- but the lone bed is a wrinkle you hadn’t expected.

Din, ever pragmatic, had been quick to point out that it was plenty big enough for the three of you, and it was only one night. He was right, of course.

Still, you’d never been so grateful for dim lighting, sure that your secret longing for the Mandalorian was written plainly on your flustered face.

You couldn’t have said exactly when your feelings for Din Djarin had strayed  into dangerous territory. Somewhere in the months of traveling with him, caring for his child, helping maintain his ship, reminding him to eat, and tending the worst of his wounds your initial wariness turned to admiration, admiration to fondness, and fondness to something alarmingly like love.

It’s a fool’s errand.

For all his kindness to you Din is an island of a man, set apart from the world in  his shell of beskar and the even more unyielding armor of his creed.  Even if his heart is big enough to encompass the child, you don’t dare to hope there’s room for you too.

And now this bed -- this one kriffing bed -- sits there mocking you and all your silly fantasies of you and Din and the child being a real family, bound together by love instead of convenience.

You turn off the light overhead, leaving only the small, sickly lamp at the table to light Din’s way to his supper.

The mattress is clean and the blankets are a bit threadbare but soft, and the baby only has the energy to grumble a little when you lay him down on the side closest to the wall and tuck the thickest of them around   him. Yawning widely, he stretches out a hand toward you, fingers grabbing at the air.

The gesture warms your weary heart.

“Don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere.”

You lie down beside him and face away from the table, mindful that Din will need privacy to eat. The little body shuffles closer to you, curling into your shoulder, and a surge of fierce affection pricks your eyes with tears. You wrap your arm around the baby to hold him close as the full brunt of the long day overtakes you.

“Good night, little love,” you say around a yawn, just as your eyes fall closed.

***

You wake with a start. The windowless room is pitch black, and in the absence of any landmarks your brain races to orient itself.

At your back, the child’s soft, snuffling breaths. A well-worn blanket draped over you and a slightly lumpy mattress beneath.

The inn, you remember in a flash.

At your front...something warm and broad and solid. You’ve nestled into it  in your sleep, one arm thrown over it, your hand grasping soft fabric. A familiar, comforting scent surrounds you, a scent you cherish from laundry days and the cramped quarters of a small ship.

Oh, Maker.

You clearly slept through Din coming back and getting into bed, and now you’re wrapped around him like a second set of clothes. The rush of blood into your cheeks flames so hot you worry he must feel it through the base layers he’s wearing to sleep.

Shrinking into yourself, you begin to pull away, as stealthily as you can. If you  can just get back to your own side of the bed and brazen it out in the  morning, maybe he’ll never be the wiser.

Slowly, so slowly, you  release the handful of his shirt you’re holding and move your arm from where it’s resting across his chest...

In the darkness, a hand encircles your wrist.

Oh, Maker.

You’ve watched Din wrestle enough uncooperative bounties into the carbonite   chamber to know you’re not getting away from him if he doesn’t want you to. But his grip on your wrist is light, gentle. His thumb rests on the place where your pulse is fluttering like a trapped bird, whether from embarrassment or his closeness you’re not entirely sure.

“Din.” It comes out barely a whisper, sabotaged by the sudden dryness of your mouth. You swallow hard and try again. “Din, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.”

“It’s all right.”

His voice is a revelation. Free of the modulator’s rasp, it’s warmer, richer, somehow softer and more resonant at the same time. You’ve never even been in the same room with him when he has his helmet off, and the realization that he’s right there, a breath away, is dizzying.

Silence stretches before he speaks again, more quietly. “It’s...nice.”

Your brain fails you entirely. “Oh.”

You search desperately for something more intelligent to say, but his thumb is drawing feather-light circles over the soft skin of your wrist and your pulse is thundering in your ears. Those touches, so delicate from a man so strong, blur your thoughts like liquor and drag a confession from your lips before you can bite it back. “I’ve always wanted to hold you.”

You wait, blessing the darkness that swallows your shame,  and hope he’s not going to tell you to pack your things and find a job in this bleak little skug hole for when he leaves you behind.

Instead, you feel the mattress shift and know he’s turned toward you.

The sudden fear of breaking Din’s creed is overwhelming, even in the dark. Instinct has you squeezing your eyes shut so tightly that white specks float behind your eyelids.

“I can’t see you,” you say quickly. “I promise.”

“I know.”

His thumb moves from your wrist across your palm, uncurling your fingers to map each one in turn, trailing up to the tips and back down again. You wonder how long it’s been since he’s touched anyone’s bare skin.

He sighs, which is nothing new, but this one doesn’t sound exasperated. It sounds almost...content. “Mesh’la,” he murmurs. “Beautiful girl. I thought so the first time I saw you.”

You’re overcome with a wild, childish urge to pinch yourself to make sure you’re not dreaming.

His praise gives you a rush of courage to ask for something you’ve only dreamed of. “Din...can I touch you? Is it allowed?”

His only answer is to cradle your hand in his, bringing it to rest on his cheek.

Stubble prickles your palm as your fingers slowly trace his scruffy jawline and the thick column of his neck, savoring the feel of him. His hair is soft, long enough to curl at its nape, and when you comb your fingers through the tousled strands he makes a low, strangled sound in the back of his throat. It reverberates through your body like a bell, making your head swim with the thrill of affecting him.

You only just resist the urge to suck a mark into the spot where his pulse races under his warm skin.

Your greedy hands move on to discover a strong brow and the curved bridge of a prominent nose. A mustache frames lips that are more plush than you imagined, a note of sensuality in an angular, warrior’s face.

“Can you tell me what color your eyes are?” you ask, fingertips traveling over his cheekbone.

“Brown.”

Brown. You see them in your mind’s eye, soft and dark, expressing all the   things he doesn’t say out loud. Stroking his lower lip, you repeat his own word back to him: “Mesh’la.”

Din’s mouth twitches under your fingers. “You can’t see me.”

He has no idea. His body warming yours and the sweetness of his voice   calling you beautiful is everything you’ve ever wanted and thought yourself unworthy of having, and he thinks you’re only talking about his  face.

You cup his cheek, smile at him, even though he can’t see it. “I don’t need to, Din. I just know it. I always have.”

“You’re so good to me.” His hand catches yours in his large one, his voice   rough with some nameless emotion. “To me, and the baby. All the time.”

“You deserve everything good,” you whisper past the lump in your throat.

He’s caressing your hand again, holding it in place to press his lips to the pad of your thumb. “I want to kiss you, cyare.”

Your exhale is somewhere between a laugh and a sob. “Please.”

His hand moves to cradle your head as he closes the distance between you. If you were expecting him to pounce, you’re completely unprepared for him to linger, breath hovering over your lips for a long, agonizing moment as he brushes his nose over yours.

You’re almost startled by the first touch of his lips, a little chapped but warm and lush. His mustache is softer than you thought it would be, and so are his kisses, a series of slow, gentle presses of his mouth. Like he wants to do with his lips what you’ve done with your hands, sketching and learning.

It’s only when you slide your hand into his hair again that something inside him breaks. His arm snakes around your waist, holding you to the refuge of his broad chest as he slants his mouth over yours, claiming you in earnest. He’s possessive and tender in equal measure and the tease of  his tongue against yours, his teeth nipping your lower lip, the span of his hand on your back has you drunk on him and whispering his name between kisses like a prayer.

...Apparently not quietly enough.

A little hand scrabbling at your shoulder blade brings you out of your haze. As you pull away from Din the baby is climbing over you as quickly as his short limbs will let him. He wedges himself between the two of you with a delighted coo at Din, hands flailing to find his father’s face.

Din heaves a sigh, but there’s no malice in it. “I’m here, ad’ika,” he says, with unmistakable fondness. “We’re all here.”

You can’t stifle a breathless laugh as the baby snuggles into Din’s arms, making himself comfortable for the night.

Your Mandalorian surrenders good-naturedly, wrapping an arm around you with  the child tucked safely in the middle. He presses a kiss to your forehead before settling on the pillow beside you. “Sleep, cyare.”

Drowsiness is already fuzzing the edges of your mind again, but it catches on the word he’s said twice now. “What does that mean?” you murmur. “Cyare?”

You feel him smile against your temple, one last brush of his lips. “Share my bunk tomorrow night, and I’ll tell you.”

[cevans-is-classic]

Moment Two

Moment One - Moments With Sebastian 

3-4-5-6-7-8-9

18+ Only please. Sexual Content, language and procrastination at its finest. Find more over on My Masterlist Reblog and Request! I do hope you all enjoy!

Your pen scrawled across the page, hand cramping, tongue caught between your teeth as you copied names to paper before slipping them into the pastel blue envelope and shove them aside. 

“Are you humming Yakko’s World?” Sebastian’s voice startled you, making your thumb slip across the envelope in your hand and slice a paper-cut into your skin. 

“Ah shit.” You shove it into your mouth, glaring up at him. 

Seb winced, shrugging his shoulders up and mouthing sorry, “Didn’t mean to scare you.” 

“If my thumb falls off, I’m blaming you.” 

“As you should,” sitting down beside you, he tugs the box of envelopes towards him, “Yakko?” 

Grinning around your thumb, you shrug back at him, “I can recite every Nation. Is that a problem?” 

“Not really,” He makes a face, nose scrunched up and eyebrows furrowed together, “I don’t know what it says about me when I can find it hot.”

“Its one of my more admirable qualities,” He shifts the envelopes closer to him pawing through pastel blues and pinks. 

Seb gives you a look that makes your knees weak, “That is what exactly?” 

“My ability to recite the Animaniacs at any chance.” That earns you a grin, Sebastian shifted the box out of the way to lean over and kiss you. His lips were soft, mustache and beard scratching against your skin as he deepens the kiss enough to make heat pool in your belly only to pull back and run his thumb over your bottom lip. 

“Remind me to make you wear Yakko’s outfit later tonight.” 

A snort escapes as you try to hold back a laugh, shaking your head and turning back to the sex reveal invitations in front of you.

“Blue and Pink?” 

You sigh, “Not my idea. Kacie dropped them off yesterday, along with these garish yellow ones for those who will not be coming. I guess baby daddy’s mom put her foot down on the invitation since we refuse to call it a gender reveal party.” 

Seb hums, “I expect our kids to dress as dinosaurs the first few years of their lives.” Your heart nearly stops. Looking sideways at him he hasn’t stopped peeking into the yellow envelopes, tongue sticking out, eyebrows bunched together and you’re suddenly struck with the idea of having kids. Those kids coming out with his jawline or the color of his eyes. A blush creeps its way up your neck, settle hot and heavy in your cheeks and chest, hoping he would go into detail without you having to say anything. 

It’s only been a few months, you’ve only recently swapped keys to each other’s apartments and once you were in the room while he was on the phone with his mom, but that doesn’t count as meeting her; does it? You couldn’t even imagine him being in the same room as any of your relatives — Kids were the last thing on your mind.

“I can hear the panic.” His eyes cut to you, mouth pressing together, “I didn’t mean to-” 

“No, no, it’s okay—I just-”

Seb runs a hand down your back coming to rest on your knee before giving it a small squeeze, “Its still early, I know, There’s no need to panic babe.” He tries to smile at you but frowns instead bringing his other hand up to tilt your chin towards him, “Seriously, Honey, it’s okay I didn’t mean to let that slip and if I scared you-“ 

“You didn’t!” You grab his hand, bring it up to your mouth, “I swear. I think I’m still processing the words is all. I never really thought of kids past my nieces and nephews, but,” trying to fight back another blush, you force the words out in one full breath, “If we ever get there I wouldn’t mind raising some with you.” 

Seb smiles, thumb brushing over your bottom lip again before diving in and bringing you back for another body scorching kiss. His chair tumbles back as he lifts, your lips following him, his hands sliding down your shoulder, along your arms to grip at your sides and help lift you up. 

A squeal escapes when your feet come off the ground, Seb laughing into the kiss even as he presses you against the edge of the table. 

The box of envelopes didn’t stand a chance as he maneuvers you further back, one hand lifting your leg to wrap around his waist and the other tilting your head back for access to your neck. 

“Bas-” you gasp, throat arched and body pressed against him the best you can, “Bastian, I didn’t mean now.” You laugh. 

Seb smiles into your throat, “A little practice won’t hurt, will it?” He grinds his hips into you, the bulge in his pants nudging against your inner thigh, and something goes haywire in your brain. 

Sliding your own hands up his shirt to get at the smooth, warm skin beneath you moan into the next kiss, “No, no it doesn’t.”

[bobafetts-princess]

Mistakes Happen Once

Pairings: Javier Peña x Reader (no use of Y/N)

Word Count: 1.5k (feels longer than that??)

Warnings: Javi is a fucking FLIRTTTTT, oral (f! Receiving) squirting (it’s a personal thing y’all) unprotected sex (wrap it and all that) Javi fucks sweet and passionate 🥵

A/N: This is Chapter 1 of a 6 part series I’m working on! Steve’s chapter will be out next week at the same time, let me know what you think about it!

Part Two ; Part Three

The first time you fell into bed with Javier Pena was after you after a successful mission to find one of Escobar’s drug plants.

-

You and Murph and Javi had gone out for a celebratory drink, which turned into a celebratory bottle before Murphy turned in. Connie needed him home, he told you both.

Javi had been giving you eyes all night long, trailing them over your exposed skin and giving you goosebumps. You knew where his head was at and honestly, that’s where yours was too. Javi was hot. Like hot hot, and judging from the screams you heard through your shared wall, he was a hell of a lover too.

You’d denied Javi before and he respected that. But he was a flirt to the core and always coming onto you, unsaid promises of how he could make you feel. But in your line of work you needed to keep your teeth, your edge. You’d never slept with a coworker before and you hadn’t ever planned to sleep with one, but another shot of tequila had you wondering what Javi would sound like murmuring things in your ear as he fucked you.

The two of you stumbled home, thankfully the bar was walking distance from the apartment complex you two shared with Steve and Connie. The two of you were talking and laughing too loud, making an absurd amount of noise and when you got in the front doors you both found that you weren’t ready to end the evening yet. He invited you in for a drink but the second you stepped foot into his apartment, the drink was long forgotten.

It was like one of those movie moments where you locked eyes with each other and then suddenly had to rip each other’s clothes off. He crushed you to the wall, foot kicking out to slam the door shut with his foot. One hand fumbled out to hit the lock, the other gripped the skin on your waist.

Javi’s lips were soft and pliant, but demanding at the same time as he descended on you kissing you with intent. The bristles of his mustache tickled your upper lip but your focus was elsewhere. Namely, the way he was stripping your shirt off your body, then following with his own. Strong, large, capable hands cupped your breasts, teasing the nipples through the cups of your bra and you let out a breathy whine at the feeling. Javi’s lips left your own, trailing down your neck and across your shoulder, deft fingers undoing your bra with one hand.

His lips wrapped around a nipple, teeth grazing lightly over one as his hand cupped the other breast, rolling your nipple between the pads of his fingers.

“So beautiful, make such pretty sounds,” he told you and it was then that you realized you’d been whining with pleasure the entire time.

Strong arms lifted you up by the backs of the thighs, carrying you down the hallway to his bedroom, kiss never breaking. Nimble fingers stripped you of your jeans, brushing along every inch of skin he could reach. You could feel the passion, the adoration of your body in the way his fingers glided over the skin. Strong lips traversed behind them, tongue tasting until he reached the apex of your thighs.

“Bet you taste so good, cariña,” his voice was a raspy whisper, fingers wrapped in the waistband of your panties as he pulled them slowly down your thighs. Large hands pushed you open, laying along your inner thighs as he stared down at your dripping core. His tongue was expert as he descended on you, circling your clit before dipping down into your core. He hit the spots that had you squirming on the bed, crying out for him. Javi knew how to make a woman scream and you were learning that firsthand.

“Javi!” You panted, his name the only thing your mushy brain could come up with. “Fuck Javi.”

“Love the way you say my name,” he told you, diving back in. One hand came up to brush at your entrance, a singular finger pressing in gently. You arched, crying out his name again and he added a second finger. You were squirming and moaning, one hand fisting in the sheets and one hand fisting in Javi’s hair. The hand that wasn’t brushing over the spot that made you scream slung across your hips to keep you in place.

“Fuck. Javi, I’m gonna come,” you warned him, hips grinding against his face. Lips came to wrap around your clit and the sensation of his mustache against you just heightened the sensation and you came, squirting on his hand.

“Dios mio, cariña,” his voice was deeper than usual, eyes trained on your center. “That’s how you come?”

“Little trick of mine,” you panted, enjoying the incredulous look on his face.

“Wanna see how many times I can make you do that,” he said, standing and retrieving a towel from the bathroom before you even realized that he was gone. He slid it underneath your hips before his fingers were inside you again, curling and hitting a spot inside you that had you arching out and crying out his name.

“Come for me again, bonita.” He instructed you and you did, deep groan leaving your chest as you created a wet spot on the towel underneath you.

“Jav-Javi, want you,” you told him, coming down from your high slowly but enough that you knew you needed him inside you. He obliged, kissing your hips before he stood to strip himself of his jeans. He wasn’t wearing any underwear so his cock sprang free immediately, thick and heavy, standing at attention for you.

He crawled up your body, cock brushing along your heated skin. His lips finally reach yours and he kisses you deeply, pulling your legs apart and brushing himself along your folds. He pulls back from the kiss, one hand lining himself up with your entrance as he asks if you’re clean. You nod frantically and he pushes in slowly, sitting back on his heels and watching you take him in. He’s thick and the burn of the stretch feels so fucking good as he works in, inch by inch.

“Feels so good, Javi. Please don’t stop,” you beg him, entranced by the look on his face.

“God never, baby.” He promises, finally bottoming out and leaning forward to press his forehead against yours. He shuffles again after a moment, strong arm wrapping around your back as he pulls you to him, spread wide over his thighs. He thrusts up experimentally, and the angle hits you somewhere deep and intense and you whine. Javi determines its a good whine though and does it again, eliciting the same reaction from you. He starts thrusting in earnest, his goal clear; to make you come again.

Your arm wraps around his shoulders, nails digging into the skin as he fucks you mercilessly, teeth nipping at every inch of skin he can reach. You’re sure there’s going to be marks when you’re both done, but you can’t even be bothered to think about that with the way Javi’s cock is hitting inside of you. He’s grunting right in your ear, telling you how good you feel and how pretty you look taking his cock.

It doesn’t take long, you’re so worked up and the angle that he’s hitting is making it hard to concentrate. So when a hand dips in between your bodies and circles your clit a few times, you break. Screams of his name come from your lips as you clench down on him and his own pace speeds up, his own release the goal now. He’s panting and whispering things in your ear in Spanish and English, praises and dirty words, arm holding your body flush against him.

His pace is frantic now but it feel so good as he pistons himself in and out of your body. Javi’s eyes roam over your body, the way your breasts bounce, the way you’re taking him in almost effortlessly, the way your head is thrown back in pleasure. He thrusts once, twice, three times before he’s groaning deeply, the sound reverberating in your bones as he comes.

You’re both panting and Javi is covering your chest and jaw with kisses as you both come down from your highs. His chest is pressed against yours, your nipples brushing against him. He’s still thrusting shallowly, pushing his come deeper inside you as he covers you in kisses.

“That was even better than I expected,” Javi chuckled as he nibbled along your jawline up to your ear. You simply laughed yourself, laying back on the bed with Javier following you, his body covering yours. “Stay?” He asked, but he really didn’t have to, you weren’t going anywhere this evening.

-

Somewhere in the distance you heard some yelling and a door slam, but you paid it no mind when Javi’s lips trailed further south, encompassing a nipple as he starts round two.

When you make it to work the next day you’re both in high spirits, having taken a shower together that morning.

But Steve isn’t, his face broken and angry as he pours something in his cup that shouldn’t be alcohol at 8 am.

“Connie left me last night.” He snaps when you ask if everything’s okay.

Well that explains the slamming door. You thought, plopping down next to him and working in silence.

Tags: @tibbietibbs @keeper-of-the-sarlacc-pit @jedi-and-clones @sammiesweet @auty-ren @ahoeformando

If you want to be added to my tag list lemme know!