#i think this ask is regarding the fact that i graduated

[brainlessrot]

Congratulations!!!

thank you!!! it still hasn't sunk yet but i am very happy that i will be going off to uni at the end of this (THIS!!) year, lowkey scared bc high school (y bachiller) was my routine for like the past 6 years but life goes on!! hope your day is well anon <33

[onlyjaeyun]

𝐏𝐎𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐍  – 𝟏𝟎

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐄𝐍: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲

⤲ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐋𝐞𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

⤲ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐞!𝐀𝐔, 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝!𝐀𝐔, 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭

⤲ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟒.𝟐𝐤 (not proofread am sorry it's lit 3.30am)

⤲ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞, 𝐚 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞. 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐬, 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬, 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨'𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧...

← 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 — 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 — 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 →

"She's fucking furious with me right now because I haven't responded to her messages asking about her choice of outfit for tonight", Jungwon says as he buckles himself up in the passenger seat of his Heeseung's car, a huge, dimpled smile covering the younger one's face and actually managing to push away all those annoying thoughts roaming his cousin's mind.

Heeseung can't help but let out a deep sigh, because just as he's expected, Won doesn't hesitate to hold up his phone and show him the cute little pictures you had sent your best friends a few hours prior, which definitely don't fail to make his head spin like crazy.

"Honestly she looks bomb in all of them", Jungwon chuckles and puts his phone away without giving his older cousin the chance to fully take in the sight of your pretty body clad in a tight dress, exposing just the right amount of cleavage as well as presenting your legs in the most perfect way possible.

And as images of all the things he wants to do you fill his head, a huge jolt of guilt rushes through his whole body, a feeling he's gotten used to by now, yet never fails to ruin his mood in ways he can't explain. Heeseung knows his train of thoughts regarding his best friend's little sister is wrong, he shouldn't think about you this way, but after years of fighting with himself, he's come to accept it and brush all those visuals off to the side, all the way to the last corner of his brain to save them for his lonely nights.

"Oh, come on, old man", Jungwon suddenly exclaims and rolls his eyes at his cousin's lack of response, "she's a fucking ten, stop acting like she's not at least attractive."

"She's Hoon's sister, Won", Heeseung gulps harshly, the words feeling heavier than usual and as soon as they roll off his tongue, he can't help but remember all the times he's had to forget the most significant fact about you, just to enjoy himself.

"So?" The younger one doesn't even try to hide his confusion, a trait which definitely comes in handy at times, yet in moments like these Heeseung definitely hates him for it.

"Of course she's attractive", he mumbles and runs a hand through his dark hair to calm himself down, "but not to me."

"Right", Won scoffs and pulls off his beanie as the heat in the little space of Seung's car seems to overwhelm him, "you act like admitting it is going to get you into jail. She's only two yesrs younger than you, you know that, right?"

Of course he does. It's the only thing he's been telling himself ever since the day he realised how much he wants you and what started out as a way to stop his feelings from getting worse, ended up being the number one excuse for his fucked up brain to go absolutely wild when it comes to thoughts of you.

It's never been about age to Heeseung. He might have stated it as a reason back when you had decided to confess your feelings to him on the night of his graduation party, yet he's always been aware of the fact that he never really cared about those two years. You've never been too immature or too young, he's actually always admired just how wise and thoughtful you were compared to everyone else around him. But it's always been the easiest road to walk on whenever it came to the point where he somehow ended up considering a conversation about you with your older brother.

"She's still Hoon's younger sister and that's why it's weird to me to think of her like that."

Fucking lies.

Heeseung sometimes struggles to believe just how easy lying about his feelings and thoughts had become to him. A realisation, which never fails to scare him as he used to be so keen on being as honest as he could be in every situation imaginable.

"Whatever", Jungwon mumbles and lets out a soft sigh, "I'm so happy your little trophy wife isn't coming. I know my baby said she wouldn't mind but those words really got to her and her being there would have ruined everyone's mood."

For a split second, Heeseung feels his heart breaking into thousands of pieces as his brain processes his cousin's word, only for him to take a deep breath and shift his gaze to the younger male as the car comes to a halt at a red light.

"I don't want to talk about Sumin right now", is the only thing he manages to respond with, mentally and physically too exhausted to go into yet another argument about his choice of close friends.

"You kind of never want to talk about her, yet she's always...there." This time Heeseung can't help but roll his eyes as Jungwon bursts into laughter, slapping his hand against the younger ones chest before he tells him to just put some music on and drop the topic he's been trying to avoid for actual months.

The remaining drive to your new apartment is filled with comfortable silence as the two cousins individually prepare themselves for the get together. And just as Heeseung turns off the engine of his car, his phone starts vibrating in his pocket and just as expected he's met with his best friend's name on the display.

"Where the fuck are you?" Sunghoon's voice is laced in amusement and playfulness, the side of him the young male has missed more than he had realised after the two friends had spent quite a bit of time in physical as well as emotional distance and with a soft chuckle, Heeseung reaches for the bouquet of flowers he had gotten for you before he shuts the door and locks his car.

"I literally just parked the car, still had to pick up my present", he replies calmly, shooting Won a huge smile of excitement as he comes to join him at the door to your apartment building and without even giving his best friend a verbal response, Sunghoon hurries to buzz him in, having absolutely no idea what said present might even be.

"Seung's at the door!" At your brother's sudden announcement your heart involuntarily skips a beat and you can't hide the big big smile on your face as you excuse yourself to meet the one guest you've been patiently waiting for at the door like the good host you are.

"He's actually never one to be late but apparently he had to pick up your present", Hoon explains and takes a sip from his beer, throwing his arm over your shoulder before he continues, "now I'm curious what that fucker got you. I bet it's super cool, he actually does really well when it comes to choosing gifts."

"I know."

And you actually do. One of your favorite things about your brother's best friend have always been just how attentive and thoughtful he is; those traits noticeable in every single one of his love languages and despite not being as close to him as his friends, you could always tell he loves and cares about his close circle a lot more than people might give him credit for.

You still remember the day of Jaeyun's eighteenth birthday, where you guys had decided to throw him a surprise party, only for Seung to organise everything and get him a premium soccer jersey Jake had talked to his friends about once because he never liked wasting his breath on wishful thoughts of things he knew he couldn't afford.

As you try to guess what he might have gotten for you, memories of all your previous celebrations together start filling your brain and at the sudden mental image of a very special necklace you feel your heart lenching with agony in your chest.

However, you don't get enough time to lose yourself in those thoughts, as the little ping coming from the elevator at the end of the hall pulls you back into reality, only for the sight you're met with to completely and utterly shock you.

"No fucking way."

Your brother basically takes the words out of your mouth as the two of you stare at your best friend of fifteen years.

"Oh, my fucking God", your voice is barely a whisper as a thick veil of tears blurs your vision, yet you quickly throw your head back to stop them from running down your cheeks, not wanting go ruin Yuna's hard work.

Jungwon doesn't say much and you know it's because he's just as emotional as you; the two of you had never been this far away from each other for this long, which is why the reunion is as bittersweet as one can imagine.

However, when the tall male comes to stand right in front of you with his arms wide open, you can't help but let out a loud scream of happine as you throw your arms around his neck and finally pull him into a tight hug.

Giggles and laughter, way too many profanities and just as many "I've missed you"s filling the empty hallway of your apartment building and you have absolutely no idea for just how long you stay like that, just basking in the feeling of home in form of a person, something you've been subconsciously craving much more than you would have ever admitted to yourself.

And as you slowly open your teary eyes, your gaze meets one so gentle and genuine, you feel tiny little butterflies coming back to live in your stomach; the ones you thought you had skillfully managed to kill exactly four years ago, only for them to proof you wrong.

Heeseung's pretty lips are stretched into a kind smile, his perfect teeth on full display as his pretty eyes have turned into cute little half moons. Despite knowing him for so long, you can't remember a time where anything related to you was the reason for the infamous Lee Heeseung smile and you physically can't get yourself to be upset about it. The thought of being the reason for something you used to daydream about fueling the fire in your chest in ways you've never experienced it before.

Jungwon gently pulls away from you, places a soft kiss on your forehead and manages to gain your attention back before the two of you burst into another row of loud laughter and giggles only for your brother to intervene.

"Come here, big guy", Sunghoon laughs and opens his arms, only for Jungwon to welcome the sweet gesture with a big smile.

And as you watch the way the others finally make their way to the front door, surprise written all over their faces as soon as they spot your best friend, you turn your attention to a rather quiet and reserved Heeseung.

"Thank you so much", you say and nervously play with the rings on your fingers, your eyes meeting his and a feeling of longing overwhelms your chest as soon as he shakes his head with another gentle smile.

"No need to thank me", he replies clamly and runs a hand through his dark hair, "I just wanted to make sure you really know that I actually care about you and your feelings. See this as the second part of my apology."

In the past four years, Heeseung hasn't spoken that many words to you in total, let alone in one sentence, which is probably why the look of surprise on your face doesn't seem to faze him, as he's always been more than just self aware.

You don't really know what to say or do. The sound of his voice, his choice of words, the meaning behind them and the intensity with which your heart has been hammering against your rib cage way too overwhelming for your poor brain to produce anything beyond nonsense.

"Oh, and these are for you", he suddenly adds and hands you a bouquet of your favorite flowers, this time however deciding to avoid your gaze and this time you can't help the little chuckle falling past your lips.

"You still remember my favorites, huh? You're so charming when you don't wanna fight me", you joke and shoot him a grateful smile, pressing the bouquet close to your chest as you attentively observe Heeseung's body language.

Unfortunately your very first one-on-one moment is abruptly interrupted by a call of your name coming from the front door, which is when you realise where you two have been standing all this time.

The following hours are filled with a few rounds of the nice dinner Jongseong had helped you with, your favorite drinking games, way too much karaoke and just casual conversations.

And as the night goes on, you can't shake off the feeling of a certain gaze attentively watching you from across the room, yet every time you actually try to meet those eyes you've been dreaming about in secret, your brother's best friend casually shifts his attention away from you again, leaving you confused.

Unfortunately none of your guests give you the opportunity to start another conversation with Heeseung, each one of your attempts being interrupted by someone else and by the nth time you just give up, accepting your fate that maybe you're just not supposed to talk to him.

Different than you'd expected, your as well as your brother's friends do a great job keeping him away from you, as you pay a little more attention to your green haired coworker than some of your other guests, yet always finding yourself hoping to be interrupted.

It's not like Jiung's boring or annoying you, his company actually quite enjoyable and comfortable, which is why you feel so bad for being relieved by your best friend's sudden appearance every time you felt yourself tensing up from the slight awkwardness between the two of you.

You can tell from the way he's been following you around that Jiung's been trying to get a few proper moments with you and despite this being your initial intention as well, you simply can't get yourself to seek his single presence the way you do it with a certain someone else.

"So?" Jungwon suddenly says as he takes another bite from one of Yuna's cupcakes, his cheeks slightly flushed, hair messily falling into his handsome face and reminding you of all the times you guys used to sneak out to drink back in your high school days.

You know exactly what – or better said – who he's referring to; Won's never had a problem reading you like an open book after all and just as usual, you kind of hate him for this particular ability.

"He's cute", you mumble and skillfully manage to avoid his gaze by shifting your focus on the pile of dirty dishes in your sink, using the opportunity of your guests being distracted to clean up and save yourself from a bad surprise tomorrow.

"Girl, don't fucking play with me", Won replies and you can literally hear his eyes rolling into the back of his head, "he's been all over you all night. That man wants you."

You have absolutely no idea why, but for some reason you find yourself cringing at your best friend's observation and you're almost sure it's because you've noticed Jiung's rather obvious attempts of PDA, something you've never really minded, yet seem to be a little more uncomfortable than before.

There's a tiny voice in the back of your head telling you the exact reason for your sudden discomfort, yet you refuse to acknowledge your brother's best friend and his deathly glares being just that. You're over him and definitely not about to get into your head about misunderstood expressions again.

"Yeah, I know", you genuinely hope Jungwon doesn't notice your little pause and to your luck he's the worst lightweight to exist and has probably stopped producing proper thoughts hours ago.

"What are you waiting for then? Go get laid, he looks like the type to eat pussy. Isn't that what you're looking for in a man?"

"Yang fucking Jungwon!"

His words, as unhinged and shameless as they are, also happen to be nothing but the truth and yet again you find yourself cursing at yourself for being so honest with him.

"Having a screaming match without me? You're breaking my heart guys", Jiung suddenly says as he walks into your kitchen and plops down right in front of your best friend, reaching for one of the little desserts with a big smile.

You don't respond to his comment, laughing it off and secretly hoping for him to take his cupcake and leave you alone with your best friend again, only for it to be the exact opposite.

"Oh? I think Jong's calling me! See you guys!"

You don't even have enough time to properly process your best friend's sudden disappearance and as his words echo in your head, you can't help but swallow the sigh of annoyence bubbling up your throat. It's not like you mind being alone with your pretty faced coworker, but after spending most the night with him you can't help but feel a little fed up.

You hate yourself for thinking like this, especially since you know exactly it's because you read too much into the fee times you caught Heeseung staring at you or glaring at Jiung whenever he had his arm around your waist or over your shoulder, when it's probably only because Hoon's too tipsy to play the protective older brother.

"You look really fucking good tonight", Jiung suddenly says and it's the sudden raise in volume, which makes you reakise how close he's come to stand next to you.

"Thanks, Ji", you say calmly and are grateful for your ability to hide everything you're thinking and feeling behind a genuine smile.

"I actually had a really great time, you know? Your friends are fucking hilarious and your brother and his boys are way more fun than I thought." You can tell from the genuine expression in his pretty eyes how honest he's being and you can't help but feel happy about him enjoying his time with your favorite people. At the end of the day you definitely can't hide the attraction you feel towards him and maybe he'll be the one to finally get your mind off of a certain someone who's not only absolutely off limits but has no interest in you in basically any way.

"I'm really glad to hear that", you say and turn off the water, drying your hands as you turn your body to face your tall coworker, "am pretty sure they're too drunk to admit it but I can tell this might become a regular thing."

Jiung chuckles charmingly and nods, his hand suddenly finding it's way to the loose strand of hair falling out of your hair clip and with a soft smile you cock your head to the side and look at him attentively.

"Definitely wouldn't mind that. You've got a nice bunch there, really great company", he mumbles and gently caresses your cheek with the back of his finger, sending chills over your arms with the sudden contrast of his cold rings against your slightly heated skin.

However, as sweet and gentle as his touches are, you feel the urge to move away for some reason, mostly because you're definitely not really keen on someone walking in on you two so close together, especially since the chance of said someone being your brother or one of his best friends are way too high.

The tiny voice in the back of your head has started screaming at this point and you hate how much you're actually fighting it. There's no need to be so hesitant with Jiung. He's made his intentions quite clear with his behavior and despite his lack of interest in something serious, you're not necessarily turned off, but actually intrigued.

A beat of silence follows his words, the tension in the air turning so thick, you could practically cut through it with a knife if you tried and with a soft sigh you pull your bottom lip between your teeth and let him fake yet another step closer to you.

"Is this okay?" Jiung asks calmly and takes your face into his pretty hands, the gesture so sweet yet nowhere are those butterflies from earlier to be seen.

And as soon as you manage to push those doubts and thoughts aside, you nod in response to his question and even move a little further into his touch, only for the jarring sound of glass breaking into thousands of pieces to pull you back to reality.

With a soft gasp of surprise you quickly turn around, make your way into the direction the loud noise came from and feel waves of shock roll over you at the sight of Heeseung on his knees as he carefully picks up the little pieces of glass. 

"I'm so sorry", he quickly says, yet doesn't look at you and for some reason you can't help but wonder why he's decided to avoid your gaze again, "I got lost in my thoughts and it just slipped out of my hand."

His explanation is quick and simple, so you just shake your head and reassure him to make sure he knows you genuinely don't mind.

And as you help carefully kneel down to help your brother's best friend, Heeseung feels the rage and jealousy in his chest slowly calming down again, as well as the rationality finally returning to him, yet unfortunately way too late. If he could have only used his actual brain before letting his emotions take over, he wouldn't have made such a mess, yet a wave of relief quickly following everything as he reminds himself that you didn't actually kiss that pretty face.

He didn't mean to eavesdrop. Heeseung hadn't even seen Jiung enter the kitchen, actually assumed you were by yourself once Jungwon had walked into the living room, which is how he found himself listening in on your little conversation.

Never in a lifetime would he have forgiven himself for letting it happen right then and there. You might not actually be his but he'd be dammed if he made himself go through the agony of watching you with someone else. He's had to put up with that baristas little shit show all night, he was sure as hell not going to let him win this round as well.

Was the damage avoidable? Definitely. Was it necessary? Absolutely fucking yes.

Heeseung can tell from the worry in your voice how you don't even seem angry or annoyed for your kiss to be ruined and he absolutely hates himself for being so excited about it.

He's very well aware of how wishful and delusional his thoughts had become, yet there's a part of him which is convinced your sudden lack of interest in your new coworker was actually because of him.

"As long as you didn't hurt yourself", you say quickly and finally manage to lock gazes with him, yet instantly regretting it as you're met with nothing but rage and an expression you had never seen in his eyes before.

Maybe you're too tired or tipsier than you thought, yet you can't help but wonder what's going on behind those pretty eyes.

"That guy's up to no good", Heeseung suddenly mumbles and takes the last pieces of glass carefully into his palm, back to skilfully avoiding your gaze and at first his words overwhelm you, but are quickly echoing in your brain with intensity you actually feel yourself getting lightheaded .

"Pardon?"

You can't get yourself to vide your shock about his comment, a tiny wave of snger breaking down on you at the thought of Heeseung actually saying something like this to you.

"You heard what I said, princess", he grunts and basically jumps onto his feet, doesn't even give you enough time to comprehend his use of an actual pet name for you, "be careful with him. You deserve and definitely should do better than him."

You open your mouth in an attempt to actually respond to him, yet fail miserably as you close it again without uttering a single word; apparently Heeseung wasn't planning on listening anyway as he shoots you one last warning glare and throws the broken pieces of glass into the little trash bin in your hallways before he makes his way to your front door and actually leaves without looking back.

And as you remain in your position on the floor, tiny pieces of shattered glass in your hands and your brows furrowed in absolute confusion, you struggle to actually comprehend what had just happened. Because what the fuck actualy just happened? And why did it manage it to revive those fucking butterflies yet again?

(A/N: i feel like it's way more boring than i wanted it to be so pls lmk what you guys think. too tired to write more so pls know i love and appreciate all of you, sending kisses to everyone. also this chap was inspired by the one scene in twisted games, ifykyk lmao feedback and reblogs are appreciated babies 🧸🩷)

TAGLIST: @soonigiri @thvhannie @enhaz1 @kpoprhia @abrazosolorcereza @deobitifull @mixtape-racha @certifiedmoa @jungwon-xo @hoonieluv @enhamysunshines @jaehoonii @pussyslayerhd @ineedsomezzz @neocockthotology @heerinnie @onionzzzs @hee-pster @3amstarlight @xxxxrvexxxx @primroselover @mimikittysblog @iea-tsand @lhspeachie @xiaoderrrr @viagumi @smg-valeria @kells5595 @heeseunghee7 @xrvrqs @ddazed-lhs @heebrry @fakeuwus @dammit-jjk @ivyannemarie @thekinkpopstandsforkrackheads @s00buwu

[jtl-fics]

Fluent Freshman - Part 22

PREVIOUS

Y’know how sometimes you have something that you need to do or something that you know is going to happen but you just keep…putting it off? Like you know at some point it is going to happen but you put it off over and over and over and over again? You’re getting increasingly anxious every time you put it off because you know it has to get done but you also know that the longer you wait the worse it is going to get. Finally, FINALLY, the anxiety is just a little too much and you end up having to deal with it.

You finally deal with it and the whole ordeal takes maybe five minutes tops and it was in no way shape or form worth the level of anxiety that you put yourself through. Like you worried about this for a good and long while and it wasn’t even that bad?

That is currently how FF feels about being stabbed by Andrew Minyard.

This is what he was so worried about that he had lost sleep, had nightmares, had lost weight, and had exacerbated his stress ulcers over.

Getting stabbed wasn’t anywhere near as bad as he had thought it was going to be. Maybe it was the fact that it was just a single stab wound instead of the Psycho levels that he had been imagining (Wow, showers were going to be so much less stressful now that he didn’t have to confirm Andrew Minyard’s location before triple checking the lock). Maybe it was the fact that he is PUMPED full of adrenaline from his fights against Jackson and Romero but the stab wound didn’t even really hurt at the moment.

This isn’t even the worse thing that had happened to him this year!

That honor still goes to the joint winners of when his Step Family and mother found out that he had a full-ride to Palmetto and when he had tripped up the same step on the stairs at school three times in a row as people watched and laughed.

(Maybe also the solitary congratulations from his Grandma in regards to his graduation but FF doesn’t let himself think about that, won’t think about it.)

He wouldn’t necessarily call being in a state of ‘stabbed’ a pleasant time but Andrew was being so NICE about it.

“Stop trying to sit up you fucking idiot!” Andrew shouts at him.

Well….Andrew’s version of nice.

(This is the same version of nice that he had misunderstood for months at this point. Maybe FF is just enough in shock from the stab wound in his stomach that he’s starting to grasp the basics in the difficult language of Andrew Minyard’s niceness.)

Andrew had gotten off the phone with 911 and then started pulling off his own jacket before draping it over FF’s upper body, wedging his phone between his shoulder and his ear, and then Andrew started to apply pressure to his stomach wound.

Ow.

That is not a great feeling. This stabbing may eke out past the great triple trip of March 2010.

“No, take back your jacket. You’ll get cold if you don’t have it on.” FF argues because his own jacket is barely doing the job. Maybe it’s the cold pavement of the alley, maybe it’s the blood loss, or maybe it’s the cooling sweat he’d worked up but he is shivering pretty badly.

A thought occurs to him as he feels the weird wet stickiness of his own blood sticking to Nicky’s shirt. “Can you help me get my jacket off?” He asks looking pleadingly at Andrew, “It’s my dad’s. I don’t wanna mess it up with my blood.” He clarifies when Andrew looks at him like he’s a lunatic.

Except his second call must connect right then because Andrew’s answer is non-sensical to what FF had asked, “Neil, let Roland know the police and ambulances are en route.” There’s a brief pause and the pressure against his stomach increases as a muscle in Andrew’s jaw jumps. “Smith got stabbed.” He says and he looks angry, angrier than FF had ever seen Andrew when he’s talking to Captain Neil. There is another pause, more than likely Neil saying something or asking a question, “No, it wasn’t them.” Andrew grits out and the pressure on FF’s stomach hurts, “Just get out here, I need help with smith and making sure these two assholes don’t go anywhere before the police come and grab them.” He says before he pulls one hand away from Smith’s stomach (wow he really is bleeding isn’t he?) to hang up the phone.

Andrew’s gaze turns back to him fully, “You’re not moving an inch Smith, your jacket can be cleaned.” He hisses. “Now stay still and don’t fall asleep.” He orders.

Andrew seems stressed so FF complies. He can’t help but notice how Andrew’s hands seem to be shaking as the press down on his stomach. He kind of wishes he had a pillow or something for his head because he’s starting to feel a little dizzy. Andrew’s jacket would be safer from his blood if it was a pillow instead of a blanket. Still, FF would sooner die than spit on any of Andrew’s current efforts to make him more comfortable.

He looks at the knife sticking out of his stomach. Well, he might die regardless of whether or not he spits on Andrew’s efforts.

He needs to take his mind off this.

“Should we take it out and pretend the Dundee knife stabbed me instead??” FF asks letting his mind go to the first thought in his head so that he could be distracted from his own mortality. “I think it’s still under the dumpster over there.” He moves to point one of his hands towards where the knife had remained throughout this entire ordeal.

Andrew’s knee pinned his arm before he could move it, “Stop moving Smith.” Andrew reminded him before moving his knee. “We have to leave the knife in. You’ll bleed to death otherwise.” Andrew reminds.

“I guess that’s true, so do we just say that Romero got a handle on your knife and stabbed me?” He asks fighting his own shivers since he’s a little worried that any shaking on his part would just make the stab wound worse.

“I stabbed you Smith.” Andrew says looking at him with a furrowed brow.

“Yeah, I know,” FF agrees, “but we’re not going to say THAT to the cops.” He says and shock really is one HELL of a drug because he thinks he might have actually given Andrew Minyard an incredulous look with his atrophied face muscles. It’s either Shock or the knowledge that even if he irritates Andrew, what’s Andrew going to do about it?

STAB HIM?

“You’re going to lie to the cops?” Andrew asks, “I STABBED you Smith.” Andrew repeats.

“Yeah, I know!” FF repeats back, “You stabbed me on ACCIDENT.” FF makes sure to use the same intonation that Andrew had used to emphasize the word Stabbed. “Jackson wanted to stab me on PURPOSE. You saw that knife Andrew.” He tries to gesture towards the knife again but again Andrew’s knee pinned his hand.

He could use his other one but the reminder to stay still is enough.

“I still stabbed you.” Andrew says removing his knee again when it’s clear that FF wasn’t going to try and gesture again.

“Well, if I was going to get stabbed by anyone, I guess I’m glad my first time was with you.” Andrew let’s out a bark of a laugh that sounds more like it was punched out of him than anything, “Honestly, I don’t think Jackson would have given me his jacket afterwards or try and help me keep my blood in my body.” He says and it feels like a victory (not a both hands in the air victory cry level victory but it was close) when Andrew’s face settled into one of faint amusement.

“Probably not.” Andrew agreed, “He doesn’t seem big on Aftercare.” He says.

FF doesn’t know what that means but nods like he does, “So, Romero got a hold of your knife during our tussle and he’s the one who stabbed me. Okay? That’s the story I’m going to stick with no matter who asks me.” He looks Andrew in the eye.

“Alright Smith,” one of Andrew’s hands leaves his stomach and clasps around his shoulder and FF can’t help but notice how neither of Andrew’s hands are shaking anymore. “We can lie to the police.” He squeezes FF’s shoulder.

“Nice.” He says and lets his head fall back onto the concrete. He hears a siren in the distance and hopes it’s coming for him.

They sit in silence for maybe 30 seconds before the door slams open and only Andrew’s hands on his stomach and shoulder keep him from shooting straight up in a panic. Captain Neil seemed to take in the scene at lightning speed but it was Andrew who spoke first, “You left Aaron and Nicky with Roland?” He asks.

“Yeah I did,” Captain Neil confirms and FF can see the moment that his eyes land on the knife handle jutting out of FF’s stomach, “Andrew, what are we going to tell the police?” Captain Neil asks and FF could already see Neil crafting a lie to cover Andrew. That’s one of the things that FF likes about Captain Neil and Andrew’s relationship. He thinks it’s nice that both of them have someone who no matter the circumstances would be there with a shovel to help bury a body. He even thought it was nice when he thought it’d be his body!

“The second guy stabbed me.” The lie comes out smoothly which is good because he is planning on committing to it and Captain Neil blinks and looks at him, “He got hold of Andrew’s knife during the tussle.” He adds.

Captain Neil looks to Andrew, “You said it wasn’t-“

“I guess Smith can lie to a liar.” Andrew interrupts.

Captain Neil’s eyes widen before a wicked grin spread across his face that made FF just a little uncomfortable but only because Andrew’s grip on his shoulder suddenly tightened and his nostrils flared the way they did before the two usually started speaking in Russian.

He can handle being stabbed, he cannot handle being in shock and pretending that he doesn’t know what the two of them are saying to one another.

“Can you tell Nicky I’m sorry I got blood on his clothes?” He asks and both Captain Neil and Andrew’s gaze snap away from eye-fucking each other. He looks down and the clothes are black and they haven’t moved the knife so the wound is plugged still but yeah there’s definitely blood seeping into the shirt, not to mention the hole. “Could you tell him I’m sorry about that?” He asks.

“You are going to tell him yourself Smith.” Andrew hisses, “You are going to be fine. Do you understand me?” He asks before turning to Neil, “Can you bunch your jacket under his legs, it’s better to keep them higher than his head and heart?” He asks.

Aw.

Andrew is just so nice.

He can’t BELIEVE he thought Andrew wanted to hunt him for sport.

He’d apologize for thinking that but he thinks it’d be better to just let that particular misunderstanding go unmentioned.

Captain Neil bunches his jacket up and puts it under FF’s legs before he goes over to check on Romero and Jackson. In the corner of his eye he sees Captain Neil pause at the sight of Romero before moving over to Jackson.

“Why is he in these?!” Neil asks baffled.

“It’s a weird sex alley Captain Neil! I don’t know WHAT to tell you!” Yeah he’s definitely going into shock. The sirens are getting closer though so he’ll probably be okay.

***

The cops all have a bit of a laugh about Jackson’s cuffs until Neil tells them exactly who they are taking into custody. Neil could admit that he’s a little irritated with Andrew that at no point did the man clarify that the people who FF and Andrew were dealing with were Romero and Jackson.

Those are his father’s goons.

“They were here for me.” Neil says to the police officer and Andrew’s hand tightens in his, “They tried to take Smith because he’s my friend.”

They had decided on their story before the cops came. FF had no idea who any of these people were and was just defending himself. He’d gone out to catch his breath in the alley when Jackson had shown up. Neil had asked how in the world FF had handled Jackson on his own but FF must have been getting kind of loopy from blood loss because all he said was, “He told me to sing so I did.”

Neil can find out the full story later.

The important part is.

“Jackson went after Smith but Smith won the fight.” Neil says looking at where the cops are trying to decide how to get the fuzzy pink handcuffs off of Jackson to get him in the far more secure police issued handcuffs.

“Your friend said that you and he took out Romero together. That Romero is the one who stabbed him with your knife.” He says.

“Yes.” Andrew answers simply and Neil squeezes his hand as a reminder, “I went out to grab a smoke and Romero followed after me. Romero got hold of one of my knives in the struggle and stabbed Smith.” Andrew says with his usual deadpan affect.

“Yeah that’s what your friend Smith was saying too.” The officer says. “Well, I’m sure the FBI will want to talk to you all further but for now it’s a pretty clear cut case of self defense and no one but your friend has any serious injuries.” The officer pats Neil on the shoulder and Neil manages not to shirk away from the touch. The officer retracts his hand, “You guys are free to go tonight.” He says and turns back towards the car where a dazed Romero is in the back seat.

“Where did they take Smith?” Andrew asks since they’d been shepherded away from Smith the moment the ambulance had come. They hadn’t been able to ask which hospital Smith was going to be taken to so they could go and get updates.

“Lexington.” The cop answers, “Go on and see your friend. He seemed pretty loopy he kept talking about some beauty contest thing when he was getting loaded into the ambulance. I’m sure he’ll be a riot on painkillers.” The cop goes for a joke but it twists something in Neil’s stomach to think of FF so out of it that he’s talking nonsensically.

He feels Andrew’s hand stiffen in his and knows he’s not alone.

“Thanks.” Neil says before they head towards the front of the club. The club had been emptied out when the cops had come so Roland was babysitting Aaron and Nicky for them while they talked to the cops and FF was loaded out to the hospital.

In a way it’s almost a blessing that Nicky and Aaron are both so blasted that they aren’t comprehending any of what’s going on. They’ll have to drop them off back at the house before they go to the hospital. They’ll beat Wymack there easily even after the interrogation and drop off.

FF had asked them to call Wymack to let him know what was going on “I gave him the rights to make health care decisions for me if I’m incapacitated.” FF had said so Neil texts Wymack the hospital and the address after Andrew rattles it off for him.

“I don’t like that you hid it from me.” Neil says in the car.

“They wanted to kill you.” Andrew won’t apologize.

They still hold hands on the drive back to the Columbia house.

Andrew takes care of getting Aaron into bed while Neil helps Nicky.

Nicky who looks at Neil with a loopy smile and Neil hurts knowing that tomorrow when Nicky finds out about tonight and how he was too blasted to do anything to help FF.

Andrew and Neil reconvene in the Maserati and make their way to the hospital before either of them realize the issue.

“What is the name of the patient you’re looking for an update on?” The receptionist asks.

Both Andrew and Neil freeze.

Fuck.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

NEXT

Per your requests:

@i-have-three-feelings​ @blep-23​ @dreamerking27​ @andreilsmyreligion​ @belodensetdust​ @rainbowpineapplebottle @yarn-ace @iwouldlikesometea @lily-s-world​ @obscureshipsandchips​ @booklover242​ @whataboutmyfries​ @sahturnos​ @pluto-pepsi​ @dreamerthinker​ @passinhosdetartaruga​ @leftunknownheart​ @aro-manita-muscaria @hologramsaredead​ @Chaoticgremlinswishtheycouldbeme @tntwme​ @tayspots @nick-scar​ @crazy-fangirl2524​ @blue-jos10​ @stabbyfoxandrew​ @splishsplashyouropinionistrash​ @sammichly​ @the-broken-pen​ @bitchesdoweknowu​ @very-small-flower​ @ghostlyboiii​ @its-a-paxycab​ @bisexual-genderfluid-fan​ @cheesecookie​ @theoneandonlylostsock​ @foxsoulcourt​ @blueleys @adverbialstarlight​ @elia-nna​ @can-i-just-stay-in-the-corner​ @nikodiangel​ @foxandcrow-inatrenchcoat​ @hallucinatedjosten​ @satanic-foxhole-court​ @vexingcosmos​ @chalilodimun​ @insectsgetcooked​ @angry-kid-with-no-money​ @queer-crows​ @lillyndra​ @themugglemudperson​ @readertodeath​ @apileofpillows​ @mortalsbowbeforeme​ @hellomynameismoo​ @next-level-mess @youreonlylow​ @interstellarfig​ @notprocrastinatingatalltoday​ @percyjacksonfan3​ @queenofcrazy27​ @bsmr261 @ghostlyscares​ @spencellio​ @adinthedarkroom​ @harpymoth​ @sufferingjustalilbit​ @anxietymoss​ @oddgreyhound​ @ohno-myhyperfixation-itsbroken​ @ken22789​ @atiredvampire​ @isoldescorner​ @not--a--pipedream​ @azure-wing​ @bushbees​  @roonilwazlib-main​ @crumplelush​ @foldedaces-paperbirds​ @thesenseinnonsense​ @let-tyrants-fear​ @ketchupandfries​ @legowerewolf​ @deadlydodos​ @but-we-respect-his-craft​ @cariniqe​ @zanypersonapricotbiscuit​ @lesbian-blackbeard​ @lesbiansupernatural​ @silvermasquerade​ @thepeachfuzz​ @minniemariex @kazoo-the-demjin​ @gaypomegranate​ @ji-nk-ies​ @neilimfinejosten​

The requests to be added to the tag list keep being spread out across a few different areas. If I missed you please just ask again in the replies I promise I just missed you.

As stated before if you’re up here and I spelled it right but you didn’t get a notification there might be something switched around in your settings that won’t let me tag you properly?

[twistedwonderlandimaginesblog]

Hello! May I ask ❤️ 10,20 and 30 for Lilia? Thanks!

Lilia Vanrouge:

2. ♥  When they have a crush on someone, how do they let them know?

Lilia is openly flirty but he leaves you guessing on how deep his feelings may run. Falling in love was not on his bucket list, and he did manage to avoid it for several years, but it seemed the clock was ticking ever faster. Should he commit to fun few years together, keeping it light, or should he share the rest of his life with you? A lot for a crush, and he’s normally not so caught up on planning the little details, but things are going a bit differently for him now.

8. ♥ Are they loyal to their partners?

He does admit that his past self might have taken you for granted, and maybe he would’ve strayed because the horrors of war had to be wiped from his mind somehow. But the Lilia he is now, with his love for his family and friends, had many experiences that taught him that having one special person to stay by his side would prove more fulfilling than the concept of a thousand lovers.

9. ♥ Are they patient with their partners?

Lilia is very teasing and can be a little mysterious, but as long as you can deal with some curious prodding, you’ll be content. He doesn’t really stress over time so he’s not likely to be pushy, but if you’re not also a fae he will give the gentle reminder that you don’t have all the time in the world (mostly when you’re in a lovers spat)

10. ♥ Do they include their partners in most aspects of their life?

Lilia might not have considered it back in the day, unless you were a soldier like he was, but these days he finds there’s some enjoyment in doing things with those you love. There are certain parts that are a little darker and much drearier, ones that he doesn’t want to subject you to, but he does always try to include you in the fun portions of his life. As far as he sees it, you’re part of the family and welcome to enjoy time with all those in Diasomnia.

20. ♥ How did their relationship start?

You didn’t really consider a relationship person. After becoming fully aware of not just his age but the life he’s lived before NRC, you can’t imagine he even pictured something serious beyond graduation happening. But he surprised you by the official questioning leaving his lips, asking you to be his one and only, the teasing smirk leaving you to wonder if he’s just teasing you again after you confessed what was on your mind. Asking ‘what are we’ is always an embarrassing situation but Lilia seemed to respect your directness, saying he had always regarded you as his one and only; your question made him realize he should make that fact known before you started making wrong assumptions. While he’s a little whimsical and certainly not quick to commit, he does confess to being the possessive type, unwilling to share your romantic interest with anyone else.

30. ♥ Would they leave the person they love if it meant saving their life/giving them a better chance at life?

Lilia was not a stranger to making hard decisions. How he managed to compartmentalize it was a bit of a mystery, but he thinks he’d do anything if it meant assuring your happiness. He doesn’t even know if you being together would be the ending you deserved, if there were greener pastures awaiting you who was he to hold you back?

[captainkirkk]

✩ WEEKLY FIC ROUND-UP ✩

ATLA

Divergence of Destiny by Fernandidilly_yo

This is his life now, here on this ship, serving tea with Uncle and the crew. Traveling the world and staying far, far away from the ongoing war.

The Jasmine Dragon is Zuko's home.

Meeting the Avatar does not change that.

It changes absolutely nothing.

(Until, inevitably, it does.)

Tea and Cakes by ghosteyes

Zuko is having trouble pretending he doesn't has a problem with food and through a series of field trips with friends, the gaang starts to pick up on that as well.

Wishful Thinking by mindbending

Right after Boiling Rock, Zuko found Sokka sprawled in his tent with a bouquet of red roses, and a ring of romantic candles, and one final rose set between his teeth. With the littlest twinge of envy, Zuko realized the entire display was for Suki.

The point is Sokka's flirting is about as subtle as a buffalo yak. To miss it, you’d have to be a complete and utter airhead.

Stranger Things

Down in a Dead Man's Town by holyfudgemonkeys (erraticallyinspired)

When Steve nearly runs over Will Byers on that fateful night in 1983, he doesn’t expect offering him a ride home would result in both of them being hunted into another dimension. Surviving there is hard. Adapting to normal life again is even harder. His old self settles like an ill-fitting suit, and there’s no room for nightmares and fear and his new bond with Will in it. As he struggles to find a new normal he can live with, Steve finds himself befriending a bunch of kids and maybe (definitely) falling in love with a local weed dealer.

BNHA

Overcome by redrobin1989

When Izuku accepted All Might's quirk, he never expected to feel this helpless again. Sitting in on the interrogation of a serial killer, he realizes that the past can't always be left behind. Sometimes it comes back and brings with it a body count.

One can either overcome the problem or yourself be overcome.

DC (Batfamily)

Conference Room 2B by motleyfam

And okay, fine, Tim can admit it: his parents paying off a school official to circumvent social services just to see him was sketchy at best—probably illegal at worst. They really shouldn’t have done it. Bruce and Alfred would be furious to find out that they had. Not to mention Jason, who would go absolutely apeshit.

But–

But it was also just really fucking sweet of them.

Tim hasn’t felt this loved, this cherished, this fought for and desired by his parents in years.

Doesn’t he at least owe it to them to hear them out?

(Three months into Tim’s foster placement with the Waynes, Jack and Janet Drake decide they want back into their son’s life.)

Another Mirror by byrambles

It’s over remarkably quickly. The winning Batman leaves the losing Batman on the floor, still and broken, and Superman moves quickly to tie that one up as Winning Batman turns away. Turns toward Damian.

His shoulders slump, and Damian feels numb. This is not his Batman.

Anton Syndrome by Anonymous

Tim's parents have been away for six months and counting—the longest he's ever been left alone at one time—and it's starting to have some unpleasant side effects. Luckily, he has a solution.

OR, the one where Tim attempts prostitution to cure his touch starvation. His plan goes wrong pretty much from step one, but it all works out for the better.

DC/Danny Phantom

I Just Wanna Talk by foldingfacets

John Constantine beat the system of life and death until it fully refused to touch him anymore, and when it did, it never went well. It was a fact that the League had come to terms with, or those that knew, anyways. None of Constantine’s past could explain the kid in fuzzy pajamas that was curled up on a chair in the Justice League’s control room asking for the elusive brit.

Danny had barely made it to high school graduation only to be thrust into dealing with the millennia of bullshit waiting ever so patiently for the King of the Infinite Realms to look at. The fact that there was a weird amount of paperwork filed regarding some dude named John Constantine that looked like the weirdest form of tax fraud he’d ever seen was puzzling, and his parents committed that regularly. He has no idea what the hell he’s looking at.

Alternately: Danny is the inter-dimensional personification of the IRS for Death and the Unliving, and he just has a couple questions.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I don’t know if you’ve been asked this but I wanted to ask your opinion on something regarding Fellow Honest and Gidel.

So, we know that at the end of the “Stage in Playful Land” event, Kalim pretty much offers Fellow a spot as a student in NRC, but Fellow declines citing that he doesn’t want to go to a school with a bunch of brats AND he wants to make his own school that admits low magic users and non magic users.

I think this fits him perfectly and I won’t say that it’s dissatisfying for Fellow and Gidel’s story to end this way, but do you think that - had the events been more intertwined with the main story - Fellow could’ve potentially started going to NRC at some point? Like do you think it would make sense for him to both want to create this school AND prepare himself via getting a proper education?

The ending was so fitting for the type of person Fellow is and what he dreams of accomplishing. He’s trying to carve out his own path in the world with Gidel at his side! There’s both a bittersweetness and hope in that kind of a finale.

Now, to the question. This may sound a little cynical (please stick with me for a moment!!) 💦 but I don’t think studying at Night Raven College would help Fellow in opening his own school. Of course, getting an education is important—however, I firmly believe that NRC is not the right place for Fellow to get that education. (This won’t stop TWST from probably making a playable Fellow card for Halloween 2024 though, I suspect that it’ll be a temporary or non-main story canon situation like Rollo.)

The first hurdle to overcome is actually convincing Fellow to enroll. I don’t believe him turning down Kalim’s invite was just for convenience or to keep event characters separate from the main story; it genuinely makes more sense for his character to not want to go right back into the system he despises, the system that tossed him out to begin with. He has not only distrust in the elite (and literally just came out of a hard situation where the elite controlled him), but too much pride in himself to allow for that. Another issue is that even if it is Kalim extending the offer, he actually has little say in whether or not Crowley will let Fellow in. (I’m not counting monetary bribes here yet because that’s an unfair advantage for Kalim to get literally anyone in.) If we’re being pragmatic, Kalim is oversimplifying the solution to Fellow’s issues, just the same as Kalim offering an overly simple solution for Jamil’s woes in book 4. We have no idea how realistic this enrollment would be for Fellow.

Assuming Fellow is convinced to give it a shot and does get into NRC courtesy of a large donation from the Asims… then what? Sure, Fellow does stand to gain from an affiliation with NRC but that's pretty much ONLY if he manages to earn that coveted diploma and formally graduates. Many of the classes beyond year 1 demand a substantial amount of magic in order to complete the coursework. Fellow canonically does not have a ton of magic to spare, so it's doubtful whether or not he would be able to pass those classes or make it to fourth year internships (which is when you can really take advantage of NRC's connections in various industries). It's a similar situation as Yuu, who has no magic at all and wouldn't be able to even participate in the higher level courses without Grim doing all the magical tasks for them. We know it's very possible to drop out of these magic schools (as Riddle references that no student has dropped out since he took on the role of dorm leader + a NPC in book 5 is stated to be a magic school dropout). Who's to say this wouldn't be Fellow's fate if he can't handle the magic curriculum? Yes, he can certainly give it a try if he wants to and his efforts shouldn't be insulted. However, the fact of the matter is that he most likely would not be able to physically keep up with his peers (through admittedly no fault of his own, it's not like he can control his genetic makeup).

Another thing is, what exactly does NRC have to offer Fellow that would actually help him with getting the knowledge to set up his own school? NRC is meant to specifically train mages (and mainly for jobs which demand magical capabilities). Fellow wants to establish his own school, which in of itself does not require a magic degree or any sort of magic education. Furthermore, he details that his school would admit non and low magic users, and will focus on teaching "true life lessons". None of this inherently requires any knowledge or training in magic, which, again, is NRC's specialty. The only practical skills classes that NRC offers seem to be electives like Culinary Crucibles/Master Chef (which, conveniently, do not require magic), and those can be learned anywhere, not exclusively at NRC. I guess my question would be... What is the point of Fellow studying at NRC if he 1) would have a hard time with the magic demands of several classes, 2) most of what NRC teaches is not applicable to his long-term goals, and 3) he could easily learn the practical skills he values so much elsewhere? It's a time sink that doesn't benefit him as much as he needs it to.

If Fellow wants to attend school or to get the knowledge he needs to set up his own learning institution, I think he should ideally pick a mixed public school that does not have a focus on magic. Plenty of those must exist to accommodate the 90% human population without magic. NRC is a restrictive environment mainly composed of the upper echelon and the gifted, and is thus the antithesis of what Fellow seeks to create. Public schools are overall more accessible and offer a more diverse population which Fellow can for sure learn from. It would also be useful as there may be low magic users (that aren't strong enough to qualify for magic schools) mixed in with non-magic users. Fellow could hit up his exact target demographic and mingle with them, get to familiarize himself with their wants and needs, etc. At the same time, he would be theoretically pursuing a specialized degree in education or whatever it is he would need to establish his own school and become an educator himself. That route makes a lot more sense to me than just lumping Fellow in at NRC because that happens to be where all the other major characters go.

Again, it's definitely possible for Fellow to get an education while having his dream. (That's also the case for lots of us fans that go to school while also having our own hobbies and personal goals on the side!) The issue is that I don't see Fellow "fitting in" or learning well at any magic school, especially not one as privatized as NRC is.

[medievalpeasant]

btw. i don’t actually think there’s any timeline conflict between the seven and junior year. it could easily take place after spring break in the sophomore year of the bad kids.

Prom is pretty variable, and when it’s held depends on the school, but in my experience it’s held significantly before the end of school. Plus, Goldenhoard has a vested interest in having it as soon as possible given his plans.

Brennan describes the seven as taking place a year and a half later, and the description of the first episode says a year later. taking the average of the two (with possibly a little bias towards the description, as dms are improvising and therefore may often make a mistake regarding minor details like that) a year and a quarter after prom would be after spring break but before the end of the school year. This would track, given the importance of graduation in the seven, something that would, you know, be going on at the end of the year. Admittedly, brennan does say it’s the beginning of the year, but again, DM mistakes, and that seems mostly to be an introduction to the pertinent fact that the seven are all in different years of school, some are juniors and some are seniors or super seniors.

Ostentashia Wallace is introduced in the first episode of freshman year, the first day of school. Now, given that none of the PCs knew each other already on the first day, it seems reasonable to assume that it is not an uncommon experience for incoming freshmen to know no one on their first day. Therefore it seems significant that Ostentashia is described as speaking with friends when Riz interrupts her to ask Ostentashia to spy for him. If she is a freshman on day one, it seems unlikely to me that she would have these friends, indicating she might be a sophomore. This would track also given the sort of dismissive attitude she has towards riz at first, kinda low key telling him to fuck off by first asking for 20 gold pieces in exchange and then asking for one the principal’s teabags, an insane thing to try and steal given the risk, especially on one’s first day (riz does this because he is in fact insane). She later has a fairly popular party, further indicating that she has greater social power than your average freshman. So, if Ostentashia is a sophomore in freshman year, and a junior in the seven, it seems reasonable to assume that the Seven takes place something like a year after FHFY.

Given all of that, I suggest that the seven took place after spring break but before summer vacation in the sophomore year of the bad kids. Zelda and Gorgug break up or have whatever relationship trouble during the summer, while gorgug is on the night yorb quest (which makes sense, the other big argument we see between them also begins when they are separated for a quest). blam

anyway those are my thoughts about the whole thing. sorry if ur one of my mutuals who doesn’t watch d20. i have autism.

[ellewritesandrants]

I don’t know why but the idea of a soulmate AU between Billy, Steve and Eddie captivates me, especially with the idea that Billy unknowingly gets Steve and Eddie to find out that they’re soulmates. Either in a modern AU where Billy’s a big fan of Corroded Coffin and Steve just managed to get a free ticket or something or in a canon AU where Billy and Steve are friends who want to smoke a little something so they buy from Eddie or Steve picks up the kids from Hellfire and one of them notices the marks match, I don’t really care how but I just want to explore the hurt and comfort of that.

Can you imagine Billy pining away, forever in love with the idea of his soulmate being the one who’ll save him from his situation given that’s what happened to his mom and he finds out that his crush is his soulmate but doesn’t want to tell him yet until he’s made something out of himself, until he’s deserving of love and all of a sudden, he finds out that his soulmate found his soulmate and it wasn’t Billy?

Imagine Steve happily dragging Eddie with him who already looks besotted with Steve and they show Billy the mark that he’s memorized from seeing it in the mirror thousands of times and as soon as he sees the smiles on their faces and the look of wonder in their eyes, he knows for a fact he can’t ruin their happiness. He isn’t selfish enough to do it even others would say he was and all he could do was pretend to be happy and smile at the happy couple.

Imagine Billy pulling away, either out of fear he’d inadvertently ruin their relationship or because he couldn’t stand being surrounded by what he couldn’t have and the kids weirdly enough noticing and trying to figure out what’s wrong. It doesn’t help that Neil’s always been bitter about soulmates and he loved rubbing it in Billy’s face how worthless everything regarding soulmates and soulmarks was. Billy used to be able to ignore it in the hopes of finding his soulmate but now, he knew the truth.

The kids come to a different conclusion, not realizing it was something regarding soulmates but instead, about Neil’s treatment of Billy. If canon, it would be El spying on Billy and seeing him being beaten into a pulp by his dad but in a modern AU, it would the aftermath wherein Max would ask Steve to come visit Billy and he drags Eddie along with him.

Either way, Steve and Eddie find out about the abuse that Billy’s been suffering through and the guilt that Steve felt was immeasurable for not seeing what his best friend was going through, too busy with being in love with his soulmate. With Hopper’s help, they get Neil behind bars but Billy’s a wreck and he needs people to take care of him.

Steve refused to leave Billy alone in the trailer while Max went to school and Susan went to work so he offered to have Billy move in with him and Eddie so they could take care of him. Since Steve only worked part-time and Eddie was in the same year as Billy and could drive them to and from school, it made a lot more sense than leaving him to his own devices.

Billy thinks he’s in a new level of hell as time goes by because getting to know Eddie and seeing everything he can’t have was absolutely painful and heartbreaking on another level. Being surrounded by their care and affection when he’s barely known it his entire life hurts on another level he can’t exactly describe but it’s a pain that hurts so good that he can’t exactly say no to it. His only saving grace is that his mark was casted over due to Neil’s last temper tantrum and there was no way that the boys would get to see it.

Months pass of Billy falling more and more in love with his soulmates who are already in love with each other and it hurts so good. Steve and Eddie never make him feel like an outsider the entire time he’s there but sometimes, his touch starvation reminds him of just how much he’d love to be squeezed in between them in any way possible.

Graduation comes and goes and Billy refused to let his father take his achievements away so he graduated valedictorian, dragging Eddie kicking and screaming past the finish line to graduate. Billy gets to make his speech, loudly supported by everyone and he makes sure to thank his newfound family for all of the support they’ve given him.

Of course, graduation wouldn’t be complete without a graduation party so they all get drunk and party in Steve’s house to celebrate six graduations especially Billy and Nancy who graduated valedictorian and salutatorian respectively. Both Jonathan and Nancy planned to go to the same college in Chicago while Robin and her girlfriend, Heather were heading to California soon. Billy had also gotten into the same college but he wasn’t sure about going because he’d be leaving so much behind, including his soulmates.

By now, Billy was in love with both of his soulmates and unbeknownst to him, they were both plently enamored with him and they’d been trying to build up the courage to ask him out. The party had been slightly delayed because Billy was getting his casts off about a week after graduation and they wanted to do shots, something that really wasn’t advisable with a cast.

Billy had planned to initially conceal his mark using makeup but a large part of him knew that it didn’t matter since Steve and Eddie were happy anyway so he didn’t bother. After all, both Steve and Eddie loved to show off their marks at every opportunity and no one gave a shit about Billy. Somehow, Billy had managed to keep his mark a secret from everyone but he knew Heather had some suspicions.

After some time, the drinking games start and somehow, Billy’s mark is revealed either in a dared striptease or by accident during a dare and it quickly sobers him up. He doesn’t notice at first but then Robin drunkenly pointed out that they had matching marks and the sober gaze of Eddie was too sharp for Billy to meet, instead choosing to run away, stumble to his car and hit the gas to the quarry.

It’s only there that he allows himself to breakdown and to mourn the end of what was a good friendship he had going on with his soulmates because he was sure they would want nothing to do with him now. He’s only just begun to run out of tears when he hears the telltale sound of Eddie’s van, meant to drive Nancy, Jonathan, Heather and Robin home later but was most likely currenly holding the last people Billy wanted to see.

For a moment, he considers running again but his Mama didn’t raise no coward, so he wipes his tears and stands his ground. Steve was a lot drunker than Billy was when Billy had left but it seemed he’d sobered up during the ride because he was clear-eyed when he was grabbing Billy and making sure that the blond wouldn’t run away.

Steve and Eddie trapped Billy in between them, in what seemed like a mockery of his fantasies only to have them play out right in front of him. Never in his wildest dreams did he think that his soulmates would tell him that they wanted him, that they loved him and wanted to take care of him and love him. Sure, it was after an argument about why Billy felt the need to hide but he had expected rejection or at the very least a mutual ignorance of his mark. He’d never considered it a possibility but the two were convinced to try and convince him to give them a chance.

After more than a few tears and attempts to get them to realize they were better off without Billy and his baggage, Steve and Eddie stubbornly managed to convince Billy to try with them. A few kisses convinced Billy to leave his car behind so that they could get it in the morning but for now, Steve and Eddie wanted him in Eddie’s van so they were sure he wouldn’t run.

The entire ride, Billy’s mind was trying to convince him that Steve and Eddie were better off without him, that he didn’t deserve this and that he was a fraud ruining a perfectly happy couple but Steve instinctively knew something was up and he’d had Billy laid across his lap with his hair being stroked to keep the bad thoughts away while Steve affirmed Billy of all of their feelings towards him.

Halfway through the ride home, Billy was asleep and Steve had no problem carrying the younger boy into their bed so that they could finally hold him the way they wanted to. Billy had long since told them of how lonely he felt in his room but as much as they had wanted to invite Billy to literally sleep with them, they hadn’t wanted to cross any boundaries.

Tonight though, all Steve and Eddie wanted to do was to fall asleep holding their newly found soulmate. Billy awoke to Steve’s warmth cocooning him and Eddie coming in to wake him with breakfast in bed. After a hearty meal, Steve and Eddie asked if they could court Billy to show him how serious they were about their feelings for him and Billy found that much like before, he couldn’t say no to his soulmates.

Months passed with Steve and Eddie constantly trying to prove their love of Billy who eventually concedes and moves in with them in the master bedroom. It isn’t long until having Billy in between Steve and Eddie is a norm and no longer a fantasy for Billy and he realizes just how much he didn’t let himself have when he hated himself. With Steve and Eddie’s love, they helped Billy realize he was always worthy of love, care and devotion and that they were ready to spend the rest of their lives together reminding him of that fact.

[gyusrose]

➵ the five lovers -> ot5

⚠︎ fluff, angst

✎ non-idol! au

summary: being alone now, makes you reflect on how much you took for granted your love life.

ot5 x fem.reader

wc: 1 .5k

——————————————————————————-

“so uh we kiss now?”

Taehyun was probably the one person you knew better than yourself, you spent more time with him than your own parents. growing up together had its advantages, he always had your back no matter what. even when he got ridiculously popular during late middle school-early freshman year, he never forgot about you, how could you not fall? you had trouble figuring out if he was flirting or just being friendly, you seriously couldn’t tell. that was until a summer night before sophomore year..

“i really like you, a lot, not as a friend but you know?”

you almost screamed at that moment, thankful to know that it wasn’t one-sided.

unfortunately as the weeks and months went on, you noticed how much you didn’t act like a couple. yes surely you’ve kissed, but nothing more than a peck and would only hold hands occasionally. nothing changed from your friendship to your ‘romantic relationship’ just the title.

Taehyun noticed as well, that’s when during January he decided to have a talk with you regarding what y’all really where. you both decided to stay off as friends instead since it clearly wasn’t meant to be more than that. you hold nothing but brotherly love towards him still. you were sure of that when you saw him get a girlfriend and felt nothing but happiness for him and so did he when you did.

“you’ve never done this before?”

Yeonjun was a heck of an experience. he was the school’s basketball captain which also meant he had girls at his feet, swooning over him, yet he saw you. it wasn’t out of nowhere of course. over the summer you definitely grew into your face a bit and had a puberty bloom so going into junior year, you were pretty popular as well. destiny put the two of you in the same physics class and it started from there. he sat next to you and somehow always made a conversation with you, it escalated week by week, next thing you know he’s asking you out on a date. obviously you say yes.

he was your first REAL relationship. he made experience everything (if you know what i mean) although you’ve been worried about losing your virginity and feeling ashamed of it, Yeonjun made it as special as it could’ve been. y’all dated for the whole year. since he was a year older than you, he graduated high school. the two of you really wanted to keep dating ‘long distance’ but we all know how that’s pretty much a slow breakup. it didn’t help the fact that he went so far away. he was also surrounded by college girls, even if he denied it, you knew there was definitely a couple of kisses stolen from his friend’s instagram stories. it didn’t take much for the both of you to end it keeping in ‘good terms’.

“you sure you hate me?“

Beomgyu was the last person you’d taught you’d even think about dating. after taking a year to focus on yourself, the moment you got to college you were met with a crazy long-haired boy, bumping into you. he didn’t even say sorry or anything which was already enough to dislike him.

later you found out he was in a rock band, how ‘surprising’. you found this out when your roommate invited you to go with her to one of their gigs since her boyfriend was the lead singer she had extra tickets. you, not knowing he would be there, agreed since you needed to have some fun. your excitement was drained when you saw him playing the electric guitar and he was good, which made you more annoyed.

your roommate invited you to parties and he was always there, he noticed you the first time, after noticing your coldness, he kept bugging you day after day, trying to make you laugh once. the way he pushed your buttons made it almost impossible to not answer back. it became a love-hate friendship in a way? more hate than love. you clearly don’t despise him but you don’t like him at the same time. it wasn’t until during an argument, to shut you up, he smashed his lips into yours and you didn’t hate it? needless to say you both started dating shortly after.

unfortunately you can never enjoy things too much since he got signed with a company and decided to focus on his career and dropping out of university, in no way were you going to try long distance again so the only choice was to break up. you listen to his band’s music from time to time when you’re sad.

“my sister has good taste in friends”

HueningKai was perfect for you. one summer during junior year of college, your roommate , Lea, invited you to a vacation with her family, since you weren’t doing anything during the summer so why not? that’s where you met him. Lea’s younger brother wasn’t…bad looking. you didn’t start immediately dating, in fact y’all started off as friends, very good friends. both of you had a lot in common, some things you never seen someone also like. after the vacation you hung out at their home most of the time.

the both of you didn’t feel any romantic feelings until that one night. it was his 20th birthday and you two somehow ended up ‘accidentally kissing’. you guess you were just really excited for him and ended up kissing him. from there it kind of became awkward. you didn’t know if you should bring it up or just forget about it and pretend it didn’t happen. eventually he brought it up which ended up in a confession. you hesitantly accepted , you liked him but not to such point.

you loved him. yes you did. being with him for two years, making it your longest relationship, he made you love him, so much. he had this other part of him, the crazy one, which you adapted to love. he was like beomgyu but way softer.

this can’t be a happy ending right ? of course not. you got a job opportunity outside of the city and you would be dumb to not take it. once again you went through another break up. we decided to stay as friends and hang out form time to time, meaning once a year.

“i really like you”

Soobin was the love of your life. after three years of being single, you were craving love, wanting someone to be with and just love you, yeah you had your friends but it wasn’t the same. your best friend and coworker noticed this and decided to have a night out and go to the club, you didn’t budge and agreed since you actually needed it, at least to get laid.

you met this jaw dropping handsome guy, which didn’t seems like a club type of person since he looked really reserved wi to himself so for the first time, you started the conversation, thankfully he wasn’t creeped out or anything and continued ending up in exchanging phone numbers. soon you found out who he was, the son of one of the richest man in the country. you were surprised since Soobin was very humble and down-to-earth. you didn’t treat him differently though, knowing he’d probably hate that.

y’all started to go out to different places except his house since he mentioned how his dad was. after a couple of months he asked you out which you obviously said yes to, unknown to his dad but unfortunately he eventually found out and was against it since you weren’t “high class” . Soobin rebelled against this and still found a way to meet up with you one way or another. until one night.

he came with his head down dried tears down his cheeks. you were very confused, his next words explained everything though.

his dad had arranged a marriage with another woman.

your heart crumbled. his dad was too powerful to say no to you understood, but you still spent the next few days sobbing into your pillow. the marriage happened way too soon as well, it was all over the news, now making it impossible to watch television.

you can never have a happily ever after can’t you?

[nanamimizz]

tags: reader is a big cry baby, aizawa and reader are married, gen reader, reader wears mascara, eri is confused and concerned, i need something fluffy after the misery bnha is putting me through rn

synopsis: graduation comes and aizawa is beyond happy.

aizawa shouta laughs when class 1-a graduates.

he’s overjoyed, elated and bursting with pride. he watches them line up in their uniforms, bright eyed and smiling ever after everything that they had gone through. he doesn’t even get a tear out because you’re at his side bawling like a newborn.

your face is in your hands and you’re sniffling loudly, tears making through through the cracks of your fingers. you spent all day getting ready and now you’re face is soaking wet with tears and snot. he hands you the handkerchief that was folded in the pocket of his suit and pats your back. eri looks up at you with eyes that filled with more concern than curiosity.

“here, come on they haven’t even gotten their diplomas yet and you’re already crying.” he says, voice softened by affection. you wipe at your face with the soft material, mascara streaks making you look like a raccoon. he bits back a chuckle.

“are you okay?” eri asks from her place at your side, little hands gripping your jacket. you nod your head and take gulps of air. you hiccup and wipe your eyes again.

“i’m-i’m just so h-happy. that they made it.” you look at shouta and he smiles - even with your lip wobbly and your face scrunched up from your happy sobs you still are the prettiest person he’s ever seen.

“they made it shouta.” he blinks back his own tears. the scars still ache but they have healed. his students have bloomed wonderfully, chasing the sun despite the hardships. he glances back at them - he can see midoriya’s nervous face and can hear bakugou’s shouts. iida’s rigid regard for etiquette and todoroki’s monotone voice cutting through. even on a day like today they are still causing a ruckus in there section.

they are his pride and joy.

“yes, they have. they will go only further from here.” he says and if you didn’t know shouta they way you know him, you’d miss the soft crack in his voice. but you know shouta like the palms of your hands and you know there’s a part of him that cracks at the fact that they aren’t his anymore.

“shouta please d-dont cry cuz then i’ll cry-“, you can even finish your sentence before another sob is heaved from your chest. he can’t help but laugh - you’ve never been one to cry in public events, the only time he can remember is your wedding and you had scampered off the altar to cool off before coming back.

“don’t laugh at me!” you almost whine and shouta truthfully can’t help himself but chuckle at your watery expression - you looked like a baby seal on the ice from that documentary you made him watch with you. he wipes your tear tracks and mascara lines, tucks a stray piece of hair behind your ear.

“sorry for laughing, it’s just humorous to see you like this. the last i saw you like this is during our wedding.” what he thinks would soothe only make you cry more.

“why would you bring up the happiest day of my life on the 2nd most happiest day of my life when i’m already crying!” whatever you say next is blurred, the film of the memory continuing and aizawa shouta can only think about how happy he is right now, and how happy he will be when he tells hizashi about how you bawled like a baby before the ceremony even started.

[paintingwhiteceilings]

Can you do Male Reader X EXO?

So, its basically when either Male reader or an EXO member is struggling with his homework.

❃EXO and helping with your school/uni work ❃

A/N: Heyyy, I am so sorry this took as long as it did. I had to take some time off of posting on Tumblr as I am about to start my graduation process for my RMA. In a way, it was super cathartic to write this prompt so it became a bit of a mix between school and uni work, I hope you don't mind :')

Regarding male x-readers: I try to keep my prompt as gender-neutral as possible, mostly so anyone can insert themselves regardless of whether they identify as male, female, non-binary, etc. However, I am totally open to doing any LGBTQIA+-specific prompts, so feel free to do so!

Xiumin/Minseok:

✾ Considering this man is rumoured to have a PhD (although not specified in what), you would think that he would be an amazing person to have around when you are struggling through your homework/coursework. However, being smart doesn’t always equate to being able to offer understandable explanations.

✾ His brain skips so many steps when he is tackling a problem or working on an essay. He knows why something is right or wrong, but he can’t really explain how he got to his answers. It comes so naturally to him that he struggles to dissect his thought processes and convey them to someone else.

✾ Ultimately, he will convince you to email your teacher/professor; they can explain it much better than he can, anyway. After having corresponded so often with professors during his own studies, he is more than capable of helping you with formulating your email in such a way that they would agree to help you out.

✾ Still, after having studied as much as he has, he understands the struggle of keeping up with homework/coursework. Considering he got his degrees whilst being an idol, he is incredible at planning his work efficiently. Thus, he instead offers to help you with creating a schedule, giving you a more healthy work-life balance.

Suho/Junmyeon:

✾ Well, considering that he has an MA in Cultural Management and talked at Stanford (plus it has been proven time and time again that Suho is incredibly intelligent), he is one of the best members to go to if you ever struggle with your homework/coursework. He strikes me as someone who, although they are incredibly smart, can explain his inner thoughts very well.

✾ Give him a whiteboard, and he will shine. Don’t ask me why, but I can totally imagine him being one of those people that is convinced that “you have to visualize things. Write it down to have more space in your head to think.” Does that work? Maybe. Is it annoying to be told time and time again to “just draw it”? Yes.

✾ If he isn’t familiar with the topic/class that you are struggling with, he will take time out of his busy schedule to familiarize himself with it. He will find a couple of sources or a handbook so that he can read up on it.

✾ A part of him enjoys studying and learning together, smiling the entire time as you do so. Despite your own stress on why you can’t seem to work through the problem/assignment, you can’t help but return his quiet enthusiasm.

Baekhyun:

✾ Another member who went to university to get his degree (although I can’t find out whether he has a BA or MA, sources are so incredibly vague) and is probably used to studying whilst being unbelievably busy. Furthermore, Suho has said before that although Baekhyun tends to be the mood maker of EXO on camera, Baekhyun is a deep thinker and has many philosophical conversations with him in private. Therefore, I can imagine him being another member who would be good at conveying his thoughts very well, offering you a coherent explanation.

✾ He would be an expert on making studying fun. Instead of having to cram a bunch of facts or read a long dry article for your next class, he would find a way to gamify it, turning it from a long boring study session into a fun competition. Although he might not be a huge help regarding the content of your class, he would help you to keep your motivation while studying.

✾ At the same time, I can totally see Baekyhun being a massive distraction while studying. You will be trying to solve a problem or work on that lengthy essay, and Baekhyun keeps trying to get you to pay attention to him, as he is too restless to sit still and study. He strikes me as someone who tries to convince you to do it tomorrow instead.

Chen/Jongdae:

✾ He has an MA in Media Advertisement so you can bet that he can sell a story. I am pretty sure Media Advertisement falls under either business or communication studies, so he will probably be not too shabby at statistics either. He will, therefore, not only sell you on why studying this particular subject is fun, but he will also be able to help you actually study the contents of most math-based subjects.

✾ Chen probably is too busy to delve deeply into the subject matter that you are trying to grasp, though. He will try, nonetheless, to work through it with you. He will sit next to you as you try to solve equations, and although he might not have mastered the theory himself, he will try to learn it with you, giving you a fresh set of eyes.

✾ I think rather than being incredible at explaining stuff, he would be an amazing person for emotional support. I can see him prioritize calming you down first and having you take a step back from studying to clear your head. He would make sure that you stay hydrated and fed while studying, preparing a bunch of snacks beforehand that he will hand out as a reward for making it through another chapter.

Chanyeol:

✾ Am I tired of repeating myself and saying “This member is smart because they got their degree”? Yes. Am I insanely impressed with most of EXO going to university whilst balancing their studies with a full-time idol career? Yes, and I will never shut up about it. Anyway, yeah Chanyeol went to university bla bla, making him, not just smart, bla  bla, but also hard-working, bla bla. You know the drill.

✾ Regardless of whether Chanyeol is well-studied in the field you are struggling in, nothing will stop him from becoming an expert. He is reading up on it as if his life depended on it, driven by his strong dislike of being bad at something. It doesn't matter whether you tell him it is okay and that you can always ask a fellow student or your teacher/lecturer; he is having none of it.

✾ At this point, he is more frustrated about not grasping a particular part of the theory than you. Even after you two manage to work through your homework/coursework, he will continue to read up on the topic until he fully understands it.

✾ He might be an overachiever and perfectionist who could’ve very well used the time that he spent on a piece of information he will never ever use again more wisely, but if anyone ever needs to know more about that specific theory, he can tell them everything.

D.O./Kyungsoo:

✾ Listen, I love him with every fibre in my body, and I will continue to do so until I turn to dust, but Kyungsoo has admitted, on several occasions, that he is not a big fan of studying. Sure, he got his degree, just like the others, and got his culinary license, indicating that he is more than capable of retaining a ton of information and working through difficult assignments/problems. But, does he enjoy studying? No, not really; he got it over with and seems glad to be done.

✾ So, when you ask him to help you with your homework/coursework, he will remind you, at least seven times, that he isn’t too good at studying and that there are better people to ask for help instead. He will try his best, albeit reluctantly, reminding you continuously to lower your expectations.

✾ In the end, he will try to help out in a different way, either by supplying you with a ton of study snacks or recounting how he worked through tough assignments back when he was in university, with the hope that maybe it works for you as it did for him. He makes sure that you are as comfortable as you can be, convinced he can’t do much more than that.  

Kai/Jongin:

✾ Listen, don’t get me wrong, I adore Kai. However, I have to say that he is not the brightest when it comes to academia (at least compared to the rest of EXO) or, like, his common sense. Yes, he had his moments of genius in New World, and I am sure that when it comes to memorizing dance and lyrics, he is insanely good. However, give him a math problem, and he will cry.

✾ Kai strikes me as someone who was exhilarated to be done with school, not seeing the point of going to university like the rest of his members. When you ask him to help you out with your home/coursework, something inside of him dies as he knows nothing that will be leaving his mouth will be helpful. He is too sweet to say no and will try his hardest to help you with whatever you are struggling with. Nevertheless, he is even more lost than you upon reading your assignment, confused by all the fancy words the assignment seems to be using.  

✾ Nevertheless, Kai would be an amazing person if you need someone to talk to without necessarily needing any advice/answers, just to get your own ideas out of your head. He knows exactly when to nod and say “hmhm”,  aware that you don’t necessarily want to get his input, only needing him to work through your thoughts and ideas on your own.

✾ Honestly, he gets an A for effort for me. Kai is good vibes only, and he would give you a hug for support.

Sehun:

✾ Another one who is glad he finished school and never has to go back. Again, don’t get me wrong, I love Sehun, but you can’t deny that he isn’t the smartest person in the room. As Suho said during EXO Ladder, “I think, they (the beluga whales) have the same IQ as Sehun” after noting they have an IQ of 60-90.

✾ Where Kai still tries to help out, he flat-out refuses. What do you mean you need his help finishing your work? He is so unapologetic about it too and slightly offended; why did you have to remind him about the horror that is school? He left that behind him and under no circumstances will he ever be dragged back in. He is rich, and he needs no degree.

✾ Such a bad influence on you as he tries to keep you from doing your work. “Well, if you are struggling with your homework you might as well take a break and go to the convenience store with me.” Funnily enough, it actually helps to clear your head. Sometimes the best thing to do is to step away and try again with a clearer mind. Sehun maintains that it was his plan all along; you doubt it.

✾ He will end up asking one of his members to assist you with your homework, calling in a favour with, for instance, Suho. They are all down bad for him, so you end up with the best tutors EXO has to offer.

Masterlist

[gyunglitter]

➷ prologue ➷

-“oh, the way he makes me feel that love isn’t real -– cupid is so dumb”

or

unlike you, your brother’s best friend just doesn’t know when to quit

word count: 1,205

warnings: not too many, just hints of angst and a SINGULAR curse word (for now lmao), i hate editing sooo this is VERY unedited lmao

tags: brother’s-best-friend!beomgyu x reader, ??? to ???, angst, fluff(??), beomgyu is the cool boy-next-door, reader is an independent girlboss (or trying to be, at the least), beomgyu’s gonna be GROVELING, simp!gyu, pathetic pining from both sides lol, maybe some cringe from reader (she was a teenage girl in love, have some empathy plz😭)

notes: super excited for this story! inspired by my personal love life (except for the fact that no one’s groveling for me, just the first half of the story🥴) but we believe in happy endings here!! enjoy a story of pining and crying and groveling<3

–> masterlist <–

Shit. You were so late.

It wasn’t necessarily your fault. Okay, maybe it was. After getting off your flight, you had made the irrational decision to stall your return home by stopping by your childhood best friend’s grad party, as she had also graduated from college at the same time as you. (Thank instagram for providing you with that information.) And so what, you got caught up and now you’re twenty minutes late to the dinner your parents were putting together for you–it’s for your graduation, it’s not like they can start without you anyway. 

At least, that was the reassurance you kept repeating to yourself as you begged your uber to speed up the rest of the way to your childhood home.

Unlike the last time you had stepped foot in your family’s home, you were now twenty-one—a real adult—with your bachelor’s and a promising full-time job. Just like you had promised yourself when you were eighteen and moving out almost four years ago: you’d grown up.

There were a few promises you weren’t able to keep, but you’d rather not think about that as you rang the doorbell to your old house.

“Y/n! You’re finally here!” The shrill that came out of your mother was nothing but joyful, as she ran from her side of the doorframe to hug you tightly. “Where have you been? Dinner was supposed to start at seven!”

You patted her on the back, laughing sheepishly. “Sorry, traffic was terrible,” you lied, wincing at yourself. You’d made sure to wash your teeth in your friend’s bathroom before leaving and sprayed a ton of perfume on yourself in the uber before coming over to the door to hopefully drown out the smell of your previous engagement, but that didn’t stop you from fearing your mother’s strange intuition.

Luckily for you, she’d bought it, probably too caught up in the excitement of you being home after so long. You didn’t come home to visit since you had left abroad for school. If your parents ever wanted to see you, they would fly out instead, sometimes bringing your older brother and making the visit a family vacation instead. There were a few times you could’ve gone home and made it easier for your family to see you, but you always came up with an excuse. You’d gone to great lengths to not step foot in this house. Until now, of course.

You stepped inside, taking off your shoes as your mother asked you a ton of questions regarding your food storage, laundry, and how much the uber was. All the usual things she asked you when she got the chance. It made you laugh a bit, before going to deny it.

“Eomma, you have nothing to worry about! My well being and financial state are fine at the moment,” you reassured her.

This didn’t work, as she continued to rant about her concerns. Oh well, you tried.

You looked down to put on a pair of house slippers, when you noticed an additional pair of shoes sitting by the others. It wasn’t a pair that you recognized, but your heart stuttered a little at the possibility of who the shoes could belong to. You hoped it was one of your uncles you hadn’t seen since you were a kid. Or maybe a grandparent! Hell, you hoped it was your weird-possibly-dead next door neighbor–anybody other than the first name that popped in your head.

Your mother sighed at you, “Honestly, Y/n, it’s been years since you came home! I worry–”

“Is that Y/n?!”

Your head shooting up, you couldn’t stop the grin on your face from growing when you saw your older brother, Soobin, after over a year. He didn’t make it to the last few visits because of work, and it made you miss him dearly. Who would’ve guessed?

“Oppa!” You cried, running over to your brother that already had his arms open for you. Hugging him tightly, you laughed a bit. “Jeez, oppa, what happened to your lankiness? You have muscles now!”

Soobin snorted at that, squeezing you tighter in his arms. “It’s called the gym, ever heard of it? Now that you’ve graduated, you’ll finally have time to go! Congrats, by the way.”

You smiled in thanks. Your brother and parents hadn’t been able to make it to your graduation since it had been a bit of a last second decision–you weren’t too sure when your graduation was supposed to be since you figured you still had a few more credits to go. But you ended up getting cleared after a bit of deliberation, shocking your family as they hadn’t made plans to fly out yet. It was you who had decided that instead of them coming out, you would come home to celebrate and stay for the next couple of months before your job needed you. Your family agreed without hesitation, they had been trying to get you to come home ever since you’d left. And here you were now, after what felt like a lifetime.

“It’s good to have you home, Y/n,” your father shouted, coming from the kitchen.

You grinned at your father and went to hug him as well. He had on an apron, looking like he had just finished making some dessert judging by the chocolate smudges on the front. Unlike the last time you had seen him (which had been about six months ago), he had quite a few more patches of gray hair. But his smile was the same.

“It’s good to be back, appa,” you replied, and it wasn’t a lie.

Looking around the home, you realized not much had changed. Sure, there were a couple new photos hung up and there was some new furniture fitted in, but everything felt the same. Even the sounds of the house were the same: the TV playing some sports game your dad wanted to catch, your mom scolding Soobin as he whined, and the beeping of the oven from the kitchen. Though it had been so long since you last stepped foot in here, you felt like if you closed your eyes, you could be taken back to when you were eighteen. At first, you didn’t mind the thought of that.

Until he came back.

“Hey, little Y/n.”

The smile you had on your face immediately dropped at that voice. That damned voice. 

You could recognize all of the old nostalgic sounds from around the house easily. But none of it compared to the deep tone that sounded behind you. You remember when the pitch had still been higher and louder, before mellowing out to the smooth baritone you had spent your teen years adoring. You swooned when you would hear it around you, and dreamt of when it would be spoken for you.

But that was when you were eighteen. And, with your greatest effort over the years, you were no longer eighteen.

“Beomgyu…I should’ve known those shoes up front were yours.”

–> next <–

[jtl-fics]

Fluent Freshman - Part 43

PREV

FF is a pretty good student. Solid Bs in his Gen-eds and As in regard to his major. With one C+ that he’s still working on with Captain Neil but it’s higher than the D+ that he had been pulling before Captain Neil had started to tutor him and he really just needs to pass the one gen-ed required math class.

There was many a deep breathing exercise before he made an appointment with his educational advisor for the next semester back in October but it hadn’t been that bad even though she was the one that had asked if he knew anyone good at math since it obviously was not a strong suit of his. So he dragged his grade up from a D+ to a C+ and he was pretty proud of that.

FF has a preferred spot in each and every one of his classrooms. In his Gen-Ed courses he sits in spots that the Professors don’t even notice and where there is almost always a gap between him and the next person. He arrives perfectly almost late every single day for every single class he can to achieve this feat.

For his Major classes he sits near the front with the few Foreign Language major friends that he has.

FF likes to be prepared. Studying was a nice way to prepare for the future. If he’s already read the entire textbook front to back and taken notes then a pop quiz can’t catch him off guard. He double, triple, and quadruple checks homework. He could probably recite the syllabus for any of his classes off the top of his head. He has read it so much to make sure he’s gotten everything and is on track.

FF kind of likes finals week.

For once, for one week, everyone is as anxious as him.

He sits next to Nicky patting his back as his friend sobs into a pillow. “I’m not going to graduate and it’s going to delay seeing Erik by an entire year!” Nicky yells as he brings his face out of the pillow.

“Nicky, you only got one flashcard wrong how about you shut the fuck up!” Aaron yells from his desk where he seems to have spontaneously developed ambidextrousness as he writes notes with both hands. “Fuck I am NEVER fitting all of this one one index card.” Aaron slams his face into the table.

“I don’t even need this degree.” Matt says looking down at a textbook that he has not turned a page on for the last hour. The fact that Matt had also not even opened that textbook before now was a bit of a cause for concern. “I’ve already got offers for professional teams. I can just play Exy. I do not need to pass a workplace psychology course.” Matt says.

“You think Dan wants an idiot?!” Nicky demands not wanting to go down alone.

“She thinks it’s cute that I’m stupid!” Matt exclaims.

“No she doesn’t!” Aaron points at him, “She said and I quote ‘I love it when you use that big ol sexy brain of yours.’ the last time you had her on speaker phone!” he uses a slightly more…effeminate voice when he impersonates Dan but FF had spoken with Dan and to his memory she did not sound like that.

“Fuck you’re right she deserves an all rounder!” Matt cries, head in his hands.

“Why do I even have to TAKE this Gen-Ed about history?” Nicky demands now holding onto FF as if he were a teddy bear.

“So that we’re well-rounded individuals with a wider perspective on-”

“Smithy, my sweet child, I was not looking for an answer.” he feels Nicky’s hand come up to his hair and maybe he’s being treated more like a favored pet?

“You’re having trouble with a Gen-Ed?!” Aaron asks turning around in his seat, “That’s embarrassing.” he turns his nose up.

“I’m having trouble with something that is going to be useless in my adult life.” Nicky says as if he were not currently an adult. “You are having issues with a class that will have huge ramifications on your future if you don’t manage to learn it!” Nicky points out.

“Eat my shorts Nicky.” Aaron hisses.

“Maybe I could study if you would wash your shorts Aaron. I can smell your laundry pile from over here!” Matt spits.

The fight devolved from there and FF slipped out of the dorm as Nicky was holding a chair over his head to seemingly throw at Matt for his ‘unreasonable number of sticky notes messing up the flow of Nicky’s studying’.

He heard a crash.

“It’s probably fine.” he says to himself and he has his index cards with the speech he has to give for and he really should go over to talk with Captain Neil.

He walks to Captain Neil, Andrew, and Kevin’s door and- “There faster-!”

FF walks away from Captain Neil, Andrew, and Kevin’s door, remembering only in this moment that Kevin had declared that he would be “Living in the library until this paper is done or I am.” to the team at the last practice of the year.

Captain Neil and Andrew were never the type to waste an empty dorm room.

He misses Pepto Bismol as he hears a particularly dirty line of Russian coming from his Captain’s dorm room.

***

Eventually Finals week is done and dusted with only 4-5 more blow-ups in his dorm room that result in Nicky, Aaron, and Matt stopping their fight to see if they accidentally had knocked him out with all of the thrown debris (only happened once when Aaron threw a textbook that Nicky ducked but he didn’t.)

FF came out of his final…final feeling pretty good all around. He had managed to get some extra tutoring time with Captain Neil after Kevin managed to finish his history paper a little early. Despite all of their fears and complaints Aaron, Nicky, and Matt all did manage to pass all of their finals and their classes.

The Tower was closing tomorrow for the rest of the year and despite checking almost every day with Nicky he still was invited to go to New York City with most of the team to stay at Allison’s house.

“Smithy, did you pack a swimsuit?” Nicky asks.

“Nicky, we’re going to New York for Christmas break. Do you think we’re going to swim?” Aaron asks incredulously.

“Two words, my fetus of a cousin: Hot. Tub.” Nicky holds his hand up and putting one finger up and then another. “Is hot tub two words?” Matt asks as he reaches for his own swim trunks.

“Yes Matt hot tub is two words.” FF says nodding.

“Thank you Smithster.” Matt says.

“I can’t believe you don’t know that hot tub is two words.” Aaron says with a huff.

“I can’t believe that you don’t know how to not be an asshole even after you started getting regular sex with Katelyn.” Matt returns, “Look at how not a thing that was when Smithster answered it.” he gestures to FF.

“You cannot compare Smithy to Aaron. Apples and Tomatoes.” Nicky dismisses.

“Whatever, so Allison got a hot tub at her place?” Aaron moves past the conversation.

“Aaron you just made fun of Matt for asking stupid questions.” Nicky says with a hand on his cheek.

“I fucking hate being part of your family.” Aaron says without any real heat.

“Yeah sure.” Nicky says, rolling his eyes and smiling as he saw Aaron packing swim trunks that FF knew he had bought for his cousin.

“Okay, I’ve got the packing list that Allison sent. Do we wanna run through it so that we’re all properly packed?” Matt says holding up his phone.

“Yeah, let’s run through it.” Nicky says with a sigh.

They went through Allison’s provided list twice and then zipped up their suitcases. Smith was going to be driving to the airport with Matt. Neil and Andrew were going to be driving the Maserati up alone while the rest of them were going to be flying up to New York City.

Now onto something that filled FF with far more dread than simply passing tests that determined whether or not he continued to get a free ride in college.

Meeting new people.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

[theworldoffostering]

The director of special education did not show up to our IEP this week. It made the meeting a whole lot less contentious. It didn’t hurt that they assigned a much more experienced teacher to DS and our advocate showed up and kept everyone in line. Should it take that much work/effort/stress? Absolutely not! I will never understand how anyone is getting services if we cannot with all of the privileges we have personally been afforded.

DH and I talked to Ms. 6 this week. It could be worse, but it’s not great. She bought herself a car or someone else did, but it seems no one cares if she has insurance (legally required). I told her to call and get some quotes. She has not.

She has a boyfriend she met online that no one has vetted. He’s older (no idea how much older) as he has his own place. He lives three hours away in a neighboring state, but Ms. 6 couldn’t remember which city he lives in. She goes to see him on the weekends despite the fact that no one has met him or vetted him. It’s killing me! She was very vague on the details regarding what he does for a living.

Her car seems some basic repairs. Her grandpa has been a semi truck driver for decades. Hasn’t helped her with the repairs. Boyfriend is maybe some kind of mechanic but is unable to help with repairs. Mom is driving Ms. 6’s uninsured car and teaching Ms. 6 how to do donuts in it.

Ms. 6 said she applied to a PA program. When I pointed out that the PA program she applied for is a masters program (aren’t they all?) that cost $109k for the 28 month program, she seemed shocked and unimpressed. I did do a conference call with her and the high school this week to try to sort out her graduation.

Ms. 6 had knee surgery last week. I offered to be available and make the three hour drive to take her. She said her mom was taking her. The night before surgery her mom said she had to work and couldn’t take her. Grandma said she couldn’t take her because she had already take a sick day that week. Mom’s BF drove her, but apparently doesn’t like hospitals so he didn’t sit in the room and wait for Ms. 6 to be taken back to surgery. Surgery was pushed back several hours. Now mom doesn’t want to take her to the post-op appointment because the dogs have a vet appointment.

Post surgery, Ms. 6 was prescribed narcotics. Mom is an addict. Is she currently using? I have no idea but she used for at least a decade and has a conviction for cooking meth with the intent to sell. Kids were removed for many reasons including heroin use. Ms. 6 said the “oxy” isn’t managing her pain so she asked the nurse for something else AND an oxy refill. The pharmacist wouldn’t give both to mom. Mom told Ms. 6 it’s because they don’t have the same last name. I pointed out that I also don’t share the same last name as anyone in our family, and we were also recently denied a narcotic at the pharmacy. It is clear that no one that she has contact with lives in their thinking brains—they are all convinced that they are victims of one system or another.

Ms. 6 also quit her job. She said it was because they were making her do too much work.

Ms. 6 really wants contact with the other kids, particularly NB at this point. We have withheld that so far but can’t really articulate why. I think because it doesn’t feel healthy or good, and things don’t necessarily feel stable with her between DH and myself and her. I’ve talked to her a handful of times in the past month which are the first times I’ve spoken to her since she left in August. Anyone have experience in this area? Is it wrong for us to feel it out as parents before we open that relationship back up to siblings? It’s not my intention to use them as pawns, but it probably feels that way to Ms. 6. The kids here have not asked to see her, and DS and DD are actively continuing to say that they don’t want to have contact.

I’m trying to be something for her but that all feels very temporary and complicated right now. I sent her a small care package today via mail and am going to offer up some services for her like connecting her with colleges, but am trying to hold tight to a lot of boundaries at this point.

[hollowed-theory-hall]

The Riddle of Tom Riddle: Part 5/7

(Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 6, Part 7)

After Graduation

Continuing with my analysis of Tom Riddle's character, we reach his graduation. Here things start getting a little murkier. You'd expect we'll have more information the more recent it is, but there is very little information about Tom's life between his graduation in 1944 and his return to Britain under the alias Lord Voldemort in 1967.

I want to discuss the continuation of his quest for immortality, his choice of profession, and a little bit about his family's legacy.

Graduation

So from Dumbledore, we know Tom graduated top of his class. Head boy and 12 NEWTs, all Os under his belt:

He reached the seventh year of his schooling with, as you might have expected, top grades in every examination he had taken. All around him, his classmates were deciding which jobs they were to pursue once they had left Hogwarts. Nearly everybody expected spectacular things from Tom Riddle, prefect, Head Boy, winner of the Award for Special Services to the School. I know that several teachers, Professor Slughorn amongst them, suggested that he join the Ministry of Magic, offered to set up appointments, put him in touch with useful contacts. He refused all offers.

(Half-Blood Prince, pages 430-431)

Dumbledore says Tom was offered multiple positions in the ministry and that he refused all of them. We knew he applied for a teaching position at Hogwarts, which I'll discuss in a moment, but I want to talk about his refusing these offers and why.

Now, I made no secret of the fact Dumbledore has an agenda when he's showing Harry these memories, he wants Tom to appear as an irredeemably evil monster that must be destroyed. Now, Tom isn't a good man, not by a long shot, but in his younger years, I don't think he was beyond help.

Regardless, I'm sure Slughorn did help him set up appointments with ministry personnel, it sounds just like the sort of thing Slughorn would do. The thing is, Tom is incredibly ambitious, he is as Slytherin as they come in that regard. Most ministry positions, especially the ones that'd be offered to him aren't anything shiny to brag about. These positions Dumbledore is talking about were probably for a clerk or secretary. We see with Percy Weasley, that the approach in the ministry is that you start from the bottom and climb up. Tom, who got used to thinking of himself at the top would've struggled being ordered around like we see Crouch ordering Percy. Tom would've murdered his boss before running around to someone else's whims.

I think he didn't take a position in the ministry for this exact reason. He's prideful and ambitious and he wanted a position that'll give him more freedom and control.

Tom loves being in control, all his childhood was in a state of lacking — both in food, belongings, clothes, and mostly control. Tom had very little he could control about his life and we see him seek to exert control, not only on his own life, but on others.

but Voldemort first approached Professor Dippet and asked whether he could remain at Hogwarts as a teacher.” “He wanted to stay here? Why?” asked Harry, more amazed still. “I believe he had several reasons, though he confided none of them to Professor Dippet,” said Dumbledore. “Firstly, and very importantly, Voldemort was, I believe, more attached to this school than he has ever been to a person. Hogwarts was where he had been happiest; the first and only place he had felt at home.” Harry felt slightly uncomfortable at these words, for this was exactly how he felt about Hogwarts too.

(Half-Blood Prince, page 431)

Tom's first choice was to be a professor. I think Dumbledore is pretty spot-on on the first reason why Tom wanted to stay at Hogwarts. I already mentioned in my previous post, how Tom loves Hogwarts. Hogwarts is the only place he ever called home. He loved it so much that he attached his soul to items representing the school (the founders' artifacts).

And Harry is right to feel the way he does. Tom is similar to him in this regard.

The other two reasons Dumbledore gives in this scene for Tom's desire to become a teacher are:

2. Tom wants to unravel the mysteries of the ancient magic of Hogwarts that he hasn't resolved yet.

3. As a recruiting ground for future Death Eaters.

I think the second idea has some merit. Tom is definitely an academic, as I mentioned in my previous posts. He'd want to study and learn everything about magic and Hogwarts and would only be satisfied once he knew everything. I think his love of academics and magic is another major reason for his desire to teach. Dumbledore doesn't mention it, but Tom loves magic, as in just magic. It's what made him special, what gave him power and control when he had none. It's what garnered him pride and attention. His magical academic accomplishments are something Tom takes great pride in. "magic is might" in his words, after all.

The third one I believe is completely false. We have nothing but Dumbledore's words to support the existence of the Knights of Walpurgis (proto-Death Eaters followers of Tom when he was in school). We know Tom had people he considered friends and who he (diary Tom) says already called him by the title Voldemort, but we don't really have any other information about them and if there was an actual organization.

Also, from how uninvolved Voldemort was in both wars I find it hard to believe he'd bother applying for a job to raise an army. He didn't take over the ministry when he did have an army, so I don't think this is something he was actually after, at least not at this time. He didn't really make an effort to create an army for himself in these years after graduation, because he could have, even working at Borgin and Burkes, and yet he didn't. Which means this wasn't one of his goals here.

Customer Service

“So Voldemort went off to Borgin and Burkes, and all the staff who had admired him said what a waste it was, a brilliant young wizard like that, working in a shop. However, Voldemort was no mere assistant. Polite and handsome and clever, he was soon given particular jobs of the type that only exist in a place like Borgin and Burkes, which specializes, as you know, Harry, in objects with unusual and powerful properties. Voldemort was sent to persuade people to part with their treasures for sale by the partners, and he was, by all accounts, unusually gifted at doing this.”

(Half-Blood Prince, pages 432-433 )

So, not being able to secure the teaching position Tom goes to Borgin and Burkes. Now, I think Dumbledore isn't accurate on why Tom chose to work there.

First, I mentioned why he turned down the ministry positions, Tom isn't interested in being low on the ministry ladder and climbing it slowly. Dumbledore mentions himself how Tom wasn't a mare assistant. He was in touch with powerful clients and had access to priceless magical books and artifacts he probably found fascinating. I bet all the time he wasn't with clients he was studying the magic he could in the shop and the things in its collection.

This position gave him a lot of freedom in who he talked to and how he got these treasures. His boss clearly didn't care as long as there were results, which is something I think Tom would like, having complete control over his life and work. It's the kind of job that would give him plenty of time to pursue his own studies should he wish to do so as well.

I don't think Tom suffered in this job. I called it Customer Service mostly as a joke, I don't believe Tom often worked retail behind the counter at the shop. Dumbledore mentions he mostly procured treasures (and also studied them, in my opinion) rather than handle the customers at the shop. I think Tom enjoyed it well enough, I don't think he'd have remained there 10 years otherwise.

These 10 years at Borgin and Burkes ended with him going to Hepzibah Smith and I want to talk about this scene a bit:

She opened the lid. Harry edged forward a little to get a better view and saw what looked like a small golden cup with two finely wrought handles. “I wonder whether you know what it is, Tom? Pick it up, have a good look!” whispered Hepzibah, and Voldemort stretched out a long-fingered hand and lifted the cup by one handle out of its snug silken wrappings. Harry thought he saw a red gleam in his dark eyes. His greedy expression was curiously mirrored on Hepzibah’s face, except that her tiny eyes were fixed upon Voldemort’s handsome features.

...

She hooked the cup back off Voldemort’s long forefinger and restored it gently to its box, too intent upon settling it carefully back into position to notice the shadow that crossed Voldemort’s face as the cup was taken away.

(Half-Blood Prince, page 436)

As I mentioned in the past Tom is sentimental, and there is nothing he is more sentimental about than Hogwarts and his family legacy. The first place he called home and something he thought he could be proud of. Both signs of his magic — what always made him special. His sentimentality is very tied in with his ego.

This is Hufflepuff's cup, a remnant from a Hogwarts founder. It's rare, special, and magical and is a symbol of home for Tom, and so he wants it. And Tom likes getting what he wants when he wants it.

She slid back the fine filigree clasp and flipped open the box. There upon the smooth crimson velvet lay a heavy golden locket. Voldemort reached out his hand, without invitation this time, and held it up to the light, staring at it. “Slytherin’s mark,” he said quietly, as the light played upon an ornate, serpentine S. “That’s right!” said Hepzibah, delighted, apparently, at the sight of Voldemort gazing at her locket, transfixed. “I had to pay an arm and a leg for it, but I couldn’t let it pass, not a real treasure like that, had to have it for my collection. Burke bought it, apparently, from a ragged-looking woman who seemed to have stolen it, but had no idea of its true value —” There was no mistaking it this time: Voldemort’s eyes flashed scarlet at the words, and Harry saw his knuckles whiten on the locket’s chain.

(Half-Blood Prince, page 437)

With the locket, Tom's reaction is even more obvious. It makes sense, it's not just a symbol of home, but of the family legacy he should've been able to be proud of and yet, couldn't.

You see, Tom and his family is an interesting dynamic. Like, how he feels about them is interesting.

When he found out who his family was he went to look for them. I don't think Tom searched out his relatives to kill them. Harry describes him being disappointed in the state of the Gaunt house and Morfin:

“You speak it?” “Yes, I speak it,” said Riddle. He moved forward into the room, allowing the door to swing shut behind him. Harry could not help but feel a resentful admiration for Voldemort’s complete lack of fear. His face merely expressed disgust and, perhaps, disappointment. “Where is Marvolo?” he asked. “Dead,” said the other. “Died years ago, didn’t he?” Riddle frowned.

(Half-Blood Prince, page 364)

I think, back then, when he was 16, Tom had hoped he'd find a family and a legacy. He only attacked Morfin after he learned his father left his mother when she was pregnant and that no one wanted him. I think he had hope back then, and it was squashed completely.

The thing is, up to that point, he probably took great pride in speaking Parseltongue and being the Heir of Slytherin at Hogwarts. Then he met Morfin and all that pride turned to shame, emberessement, and burning hatred. But the pride, the sentimentality towards a legacy that could've been remained.

By the time we see him with Hepzibah Smith, Tom has complicated feelings about Slytherin's legacy. It's something that won him friends and favors in Slytherin's house, it symbolized how special and powerful he was. But he was also ashamed and disappointed in them, the way none of them seemed to really love him and they all abandoned him. I think he blamed his mother for not surviving. After all, he was sure she couldn't have been the witch between his parents because of how weak she was, because of how she died.

I just find this dichotomy, of Tom wearing her legacy — Slytherin's legacy — proudly as part of the identity he fashioned for himself but being ashamed of the weakness of all his relatives fascinating.

Even in the above scene with the locket, the way he is so desperate to keep hold of it at the age of 29-30 shows this dichotomy. His desperation for a family and a connection he never had, he is still desperate to feel connected to his legacy, even when he hates all of his relatives.

“Hepzibah Smith died two days after that little scene,” said Dumbledore, resuming his seat and indicating that Harry should do the same. “Hokey the house-elf was convicted by the Ministry of poisoning her mistress’s evening cocoa by accident.” “No way!” said Harry angrily. “I see we are of one mind,” said Dumbledore. “Certainly, there are many similarities between this death and that of the Riddles. In both cases, somebody else took the blame, someone who had a clear memory of having caused the death —” “Hokey confessed?” “She remembered putting something in her mistress’s cocoa that turned out not to be sugar, but a lethal and little-known poison,” said Dumbledore. “It was concluded that she had not meant to do it, but being old and confused —”

(Half-Blood Prince, page 438)

But before they [Hepzibah’s family] were sure beyond doubt that the cup and the locket were both gone, the assistant who had worked at Borgin and Burkes, the young man who had visited Hepzibah so regularly and charmed her so well, had resigned his post and vanished. His superiors had no idea where he had gone; they were as surprised as anyone at his disappearance. And that was the last that was seen or heard of Tom Riddle for a very long time

(Half-Blood Prince, page 439)

Then, he kills Hepzibah and steals the locket and the cup. The cup was made into a Horcrux using Hepzibah’s death and we know he took it with him (along with the locket) when he went traveling the world for the next 10 years. This is important because, in this next section, I want to note something important I noticed regarding Tom's Horcruxes — or more specifically their hiding locations.

Tom's World Tour

Ten years separates Hokey’s memory and this one, ten years during which we can only guess at what Lord Voldemort was doing. . . .” Harry got to his feet once more as Dumbledore emptied the last memory into the Pensieve. “Whose memory is it?” he asked. “Mine,” said Dumbledore.

(Half-Blood Prince, page 440)

Like Dumbledore says, we have little to no information regarding these 10 years of Voldemort's life I like to refer to as his world tour. All we know from this period in his life is that he made 2 new Horcruxes — the locket and the diadem.

To the Dark Lord, I know I will be dead long before you read this but I want you to know that it was I who discovered your secret. I have stolen the real Horcrux and intend to destroy it as soon as I can. I face death in the hope that when you meet your match, you will be mortal once more. R.A.B.

(Half-Blood Prince, page 609)

We know he killed a "muggle tramp" to create the locket Horcrux at some point between 1956 and 1966 in an unknown location outside Britain.

“And . . . and the diadem?” “It remained where I had hidden it when I heard the Baron blundering through the forest toward me. Concealed inside a hollow tree.” “A hollow tree?” repeated Harry. “What tree? Where was this?” “A forest in Albania. A lonely place I thought was far beyond my mother’s reach.” “Albania,” repeated Harry. Sense was emerging miraculously from confusion, and now he understood why she was telling him what she had denied Dumbledore and Flitwick. “You’ve already told someone this story, haven’t you? Another student?” She closed her eyes and nodded. “I had . . . no idea. . . . He was . . . flattering. He seemed to . . . to understand . . . to sympathize . . . . ”

(Deathly Hollows, page 522)

The second is the diadem that was made into a Horcrux in a forest in Albania by killing an "Albanian Pheasant" at an unknown time between 1956 and 1966.

What I wanted to note about these Horcruxes and his world tour is actually quite simple. We know from Deathly Hollows all of Voldemort's Horcruxes were hidden in Britain, that's why Harry, Ron, and Hermione could track them down as they did.

"So?" you might be asking.

Well, I just described Voldemort having five Horcruxes (diary, ring, cup, locket, diadem) with him, on his person, when he traveled the world. He made the last two abroad, and the others weren't hidden yet since he didn't meet Lucious Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange to give them the diary and cup yet and he was described wearing the Gaunt ring. So, get this, Tom travels the world, outside Britain, including an Albanian forest where Ravenclaw's diadem remained hidden for centuries without anyone locating it, and he thought, the best place to hide his Horcruxes was in relatively accessible places in Britain that are way less well hidden? Places other people know of and could go to?

No, I'm not convinced.

This is just so weird to me, I mean, he could've made the Diadem Horcrux and then left it where he found it, and no one would've been able to track it down. But no, instead he brought it back to Britain to place it at Hogwarts.

Why?

Well, he is sentimental, about Hogwarts and Britain as a whole. Think about where he hid his Horcruxes:

The Diary - was given to Lucious, the son of Abraxas Malfoy who went to school with Tom. Tom was probably fond enough of Abraxes to hand Lucious the diary, although without telling him what it was.

The Ring - he hid in the Gaunt Shack, in the place his mother grew up, the last place his magical relatives lived. With all his shame and disappointment in them, he still felt a desire for what they represented.

The Cup - he gave to Bellatrix Lestrange to hide. I think he did care about Bellatrix, she seemed to know what the cup was, that it held his soul, and when she died:

Bellatrix’s gloating smile froze, her eyes began to bulge: For the tiniest space of time she knew what had happened, and then she toppled, and the watching crowd roared, and Voldemort screamed

(Deathly Hollows, page 621)

Voldemort clearly cares about her, we see he reacts emotionally to her death in a way he doesn't react to most other deaths.

The Locket - he placed in a cave dedicated to his own magical might. A place he made into an undead experiment, with protections of his design and a potion he invented. And where did he place this cave of wonders? In the same cave he scared two children from the orphanage with his magic. This is a place dedicated to what made him special, what made him better (in his mind).

The Diadem - He placed it at Hogwarts, the first and only place he ever thought of as a home.

Then he didn't really hide Harry or Nagini.

But all these locations reek of sentimentality and emotional attachment, even fondness to people. This is the main reason I call bull on Dumbledore's statement of Tom being incapable of love. I think he is capable of it, it's just very rare for him. He doesn't trust easily and keeps everyone at a distance (even Bellatrix who doesn't know he's a half-blood), so of course he doesn't have anyone close. But it's not that he never wanted a connection. He did, was actually quite desperate for it.

The other thing that's curious about all these hiding locations is that they are all accessible. Not necessarily easy to get to, but the trio showed it was possible to reach all of them. And that's a bizarre choice, because, why wouldn't he drop a Horcrux down the marina trench? Why wouldn't he leave the Diadem where it hadn't been found in centuries?

Because he doesn't want them to be impossible to find.

Tom is smart. He's one of the best students to ever make their way through Hogwarts. I'm sure if he wanted to make his Horcruxes inaccessible, he could have. After all, he made up the spells protecting the locket in the cave, he could've made a ward that wouldn't let anyone but him inside, but no, he made the cave a game. Something solvable, it isn't easy, but it is possible.

This tells me that one of Dumbledore's assumptions about Tom is wrong at its core. Tom didn't want to die when he started making Horcruxes, but I don't think he intended to live forever. Someone who wants to live forever wouldn't make it this easy to access their failsafe to immortality, they would drop the Horcrux down the Mariana Trench, or hide it in a vault under wards that no one could access, not even themselves. But that isn't what Tom did.

Conclusions

Tom is incredibly sentimental and is capable of feeling love and attachment to places, people, and ideas. He does, he loves magic and Hogwarts. He has complicated feelings regarding his family and Slytherin's legacy and he cares about Bellatrix (and Nagini).

He wanted to teach not to raise an army to start a war, but because he truly is an academic who loves magic.

He had no interest in working at the ministry as that would limit his freedom and control. He is prideful and ambitious and isn't willing to be at the bottom of the ladder.

And most interestingly, he never actually wanted to live forever. He just wanted to ensure he'd live as long as he wanted to, but not forever.

[kitsmits]

Nobody asked, but here are my rambling thoughts about Bleach’s Aizen Sousuke

Aizen Sousuke. The man, the myth, the legend. The villain who ~allegedly~ planned out so much of Bleach’s storyline that the fact that that is a meme is, in itself, a meme. And also probably part of Aizen’s plan.

I’m fascinated by this character, to say the least. I mean, why else would I be writing an Aizen/OC fanfiction on both AO3 and FF.net? (Shameless plug. Sorry not sorry.) Despite my many thoughts - so numerous are they that anytime I reply to a comment on “Mono no Aware,” I wind up with a graduate dissertation - I’m not entirely sure where to start with this guy. He’s complex in some ways, yet simple in others, fitting neatly into some psychological molds until you come across that one trait or act that makes you question your whole thesis. Fitting, really.

I don’t think there is one definitive, absolute answer for who Aizen Sousuke is. Even Kubo’s own idea of him isn’t necessarily the only one - once an artist puts their creation out into the world, that creation is open to interpretation by others. Again, rather fitting that we’re talking about a character whose entire power is based on the ideas of suggestion and perception.

It’s fun to explore various facets and ways to interpret a character though, so today I’d like to look at a few: psychology (Aizen the Sociopath), mythology (Aizen the Trickster), reality(I guess…) (Aizen the Opportunist), and philosophy (Aizen the Ubermensch).

So let’s start with psychology.

Aizen the Sociopath

Antisocial personality disorder, commonly/colloquially referred as “sociopathy,” is defined as “a mental health condition in which a person consistently shows no regard for right and wrong and ignores the rights and feelings of others.” (Mayo Clinic) For the sake of simplicity, I will be using the terms “sociopathy” and “sociopath” here. It’s one of four cluster-B personality disorders within the DSM-V (Diagnositc and Statistical Manual of Mental Health Disorders, 5th Edition - the most recent one as of 2023), along with narcissistic, borderline, and histrionic personality disorders. In other words, it is clinically recognized as a mental health condition by the psychology field, and it’s one of a family of personality disorders characterized as having “a consistently dysfunctional pattern of dramatic, overly emotional thinking or unpredictable behavior.” (Considering who we’re talking about…this is kind of surprising, honestly.

To paraphrase the Mayo Clinic’s list of symptoms, sociopaths…

ignore (or have little/no concept of) right and wrong

often lie, steal, use false names, and/or engage in cons

use charm or wit to manipulate others for personal gain

have an inflated sense of superiority and are extremely opinionated

often violate others’ rights and feel little/no remorse for how their behavior negatively affects others

Keep in mind that for a person to be considered a “sociopath,” one must consistently and repeatedly show these traits. Not every mean person is a sociopath, and not all sociopaths are mean (…all the time). Probably the most consistent descriptors I’ve come across for sociopaths are “manipulative” and “callous” - again, they’ll say/do anything to get what they want, and they have no remorse over whether it harms other people.

So…is Aizen a sociopath? And why should we care?

Setting aside the fact that Aizen is a fictional character, and fictional characters are often meant to be simpler than complex, ever-evolving human beings…I’m of the camp that yes, he is. It certainly explains a LOT of his behavior and actions; even the fact that he seems to have no “true” personality fits this mold. Partly because of how Kubo writes him, we can never be certain that anything Aizen says or does is “genuine,” or if he’s just trolling.

Why we should care if he’s a sociopath or not: Eh. Aside from the fun of armchair-diagnosing fictional characters, this gives us a framework within which to work. It gives us consistent traits that help us understand Aizen as a character. It’s sort of like a character sheet or profile: an easily referenced list of traits and tendencies.

However, even if we could truly diagnose Aizen with something, I don’t think that diagnosis would completely define his character. Far from it. Because this is fiction, every major character usually serves a particular purpose for the narrative that influences how they act and how they affect the characters around them. So let’s look at what I believe Aizen’s role is in the Bleach ‘verse.

Aizen the Trickster

A “trickster,” in terms of mythology and folklore, is “a character in a story…who exhibits a great degree of intellect or secret knowledge and uses it to play tricks or otherwise disobey normal rules and defy conventional behavior.” (Thank you, Wikipedia.) Classic examples of tricksters are Loki from Norse mythology; Anansi the spider from West African folklore; and Coyote from many Native American cultures, particularly groups in California and the Great Basin. Even Greek mythology’s Hermes and, at times, Norse mythology’s Odin act as tricksters, using their intellect to deceive others or defy conventions. Tricksters can be villainess or heroic, depending on the tale and their role in it. Consider Odysseus in the Illiad and Odyssey: in both tales (but especially in the latter), he is cast as a hero, but most of his actions are devious and even reprehensible.

I see Aizen as being a trickster in the Bleach ‘verse in many ways:

He’s highly intelligent and possesses “secret knowledge” (ie: truth of the Soul King…but more on that in a bit)

He seeks to defy convention and push all types of boundaries, from combining/transcending Shinigami and Hollow powers (physical boundaries) to being a Shinigami who commands Hollows (societal boundaries)

He openly questions, disrupts, and mocks authority (Even when he was playing the Nice Captain, he was one of the only people to openly question Rukia’s execution…granted, it was All Part of the Plan(TM), but I still find it interesting that he allowed that to be a part of his character at that time)

He enjoys trolling people and making them question their own beliefs and perceptions. Not even just because it’ll benefit him; I think he honestly enjoys throwing people mentally off-balance.

I mean…he openly says it during the TYBW:

Sure, you might say that Aizen’s goal was to kill the Soul King (…I have thoughts about that too), but THIS is the reason for that goal. If it wasn’t the Soul King, it would be whatever other being tried to reign over him. Yhwach, Ichibe, whoever else…Aizen would not tolerate anyone having authority over him. This fits with the Trickster archetype because, at their cores, this is what tricksters do: they challenge authority.

It’s also worth noting that in most Trickster stories, especially ones where the trickster plays the antagonist, the trickster doesn’t exactly “win.” Often, they’re foiled or humiliated in some way, sometimes due to their own hubris; I mean, Loki wound up being tied up with a snake dripping poison into his eyes because he couldn’t keep his mouth shut about having orchestrated the death of one of Odin’s sons. This is also something we see in Aizen’s role in Bleach: At the pinnacle of his power, he is defeated - not only by the hero of the story, but also by another possible “trickster” type (Urahara) and by his own arrogance and, possibly, not knowing his own deepest desires.

Btw - for an interesting take on Aizen “not knowing himself,” check out this video by Nux Taku: Anime’s Most Relatable Overpowered Sociopath - Aizen from Bleach

“Defeated” doesn’t necessarily mean he didn’t win, though. In my opinion, Aizen is, above all, a master opportunist who will turn ANY situation in his favor.

“All according to keikaku:” Aizen the Opportunist

Aizen definitely fits a classic “mastermind” mold, no arguments here. But I think people take the meme-worthy “it was all part of my plan” thing a little too far with him. Aside from the tendency of sociopaths and tricksters alike toward self-aggrandizing, and the fact that it benefits Aizen to be perceived as omniscient, let’s be real: He didn’t plan everything out himself from the start. To be honest, the idea that a “mastermind” necessarily sees all possibilities 100 steps ahead is…a bit much. Rather, masterminds like Aizen who play the long game are excellent opportunists.

Just look at how Aizen acts during “Everything But the Rain”: As far as Tousen was concerned, the Hollow “White” was a failure because instead of going after the powerful Shinigami captain, it attacked a Quincy - the one creature in the area that couldn’t be Hollowfied. But to Aizen, this wasn’t a failure: it was an unforeseen turn of events that presented an unprecedented opportunity to study the congruence of two diametrically opposed beings. After all, his whole schtick is about transcending the boundaries between species; of course he’d be curious to see if there was a way for a Quincy and a Hollow to mix without destroying each other. Plus, I’m willing to bet that Aizen at least suspected that this phenomenon might draw Urahara out of hiding, which would give Aizen his location (and thus the location of the other Hogyoku). The fact that Masaki survives with White’s Hollow energy inside of her, AND that she, a Quincy, and Isshin, a Shinigami, fall in love and have a kid…that’s all a bonus that he later works into his plans.

TL;DR: Aizen had plans for White, but when those plans fell through, he turned the situation into a new part of his plan. It all worked toward his ultimate goals in the end. THAT is what makes him such a formidable mastermind: he’ll take any opportunity that comes his way.

Aizen the Übermensch

Okay, I’ll admit I’m gonna be a little lazy here and point y’all to a wonderful analysis video by DBZimran that goes into this topic. The gist is that Aizen embodies the Nietzsche idea of the “Ubermensch,” or “super man” (from before the N*zis appropriated the concept), and that Urahara is the opposing “last man.” It’s really interesting stuff, and DBZimran explains it way better than I feel equipped to right now.

Sosuke Aizen: THE FALSE GOD | BLEACH: Character Analysis

While you’re there, check out his other videos about Bleach. I took a lot of inspiration from his analysis of the Hogyoku when writing Mono no Aware, to be honest.

Other interesting takes on Aizen

I can’t get enough of this man, and if you’ve made it this far in this ridiculous long post, I’m guessing you can’t, either. I’m definitely open to writing more about him, answering prompts, giving headcanons…just ask! Here are some other people I like to reference for Aizen and Bleach content in general:

Youtube:

MrTommo2304

DBZimran

This wonderful hellsite, aka Tumblr (not a definitive list - I’m sure I’ll forget peeps):

@bleachbleachbleach - I LOVE THEIR WORLDBUILDING HEADCANONS OMG

@my-my-my - large variety of headcanons and imagines, from worldbuilding/story analysis to romantic/shmexy stuff

@brittscafe - fun, shmexy headcanons with an excellent grasp on the characters

@recurring-polynya - writer who also has lots of interesting and fun headcanons about the Bleach world; also their page is just really pretty

@brainbleached - silly totally-real-not-at-all-made-up incorrect quotes and such