#i tried to recommend titles i don't usually! let me know if you want more specific recs / explanations

[jonismitchell]

do u have any good book recs

i have had. absolutely negative time to read lately. but here's some titles i've enjoyed this year (wide variety because i don't know what you're looking for specifically)!

everything i know about love by dolly alderton

franny and zooey by j.d. salinger

the gift by vladimir nabokov

cleopatra and frankenstein by coco mellors

another country by james baldwin

[tomatoswup]

el chico del apartamento 512⋆ ˚｡⋆୨💌୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

summary: that new boy-next-door Vash from 512 sure is cute! Maybe you should write him a letter~

title translation: the boy from apartment 512

warnings/tags: shy/anxious reader, the usual nerve-wrecking feelings that come with a crush, tesla jumpscare, kabedon! by vash, i edited this at 4am might have mistakes, cute~, Modern!AU

A/N: I....don't know if i wrote this right...but this song had me delusional..... :D,,, I really wanted to write a cute boy-next-door kinda oneshot with Vash and boom, here yall go :P enjoy! I recommend listening to Selena's "El Chico Del Apartamento 512" since this fic was a direct inspir. from the song~

pairing: vash x reader

Life in your apartment complex was, in your own words, quite boring.

Bland scenery, the shouts and complains of neighbors and the ridiculous "problems" that shouldn't even be called problems you had to deal with.

Oh cmon, can't you park in your own fucking parking space?!

But there was a certain someone that made the hell of a place a bit more better. Your new neighbor from apartment 512. You first met him by accident when you dropped the groceries you were hauling up to your apartment one day, to which he helped you and struck up conversation.

From there, fate couldn't help but let the meetings between the both of you continue as the two of you talked more and more. Often times, he'd find you reading at one of the various apartment complex picnic tables, joining you in your times of relaxation.

"You okay?" You asked one day as the both of you sat at the table, sharing a bowl of fruits you had cut up to enjoy the afternoon with. He turned his attention towards you, orange sunglasses resting on his head and mouth full of watermelon causing his cheeks to puff out like a chipmunk "Mfph?"

You had a good ol' laugh as the poor man tried to chew as quick as he could to respond, but truly just ended up almost choking on the poor watermelon. You had to smack him on the back in the end so all the juice left his lungs.

Life, work, and flowers that the both of you liked, sometimes the two of you conversated for hours on end. And sometimes, you two just liked each others quiet company.

You admired that.

But you also admired something else.

ooo girl he was cute.

You couldn't resist the butterflies in the pits of your stomach whenever the two of you took your walks together, coming home from work late nights. The closeness of your shoulders and his made you a bit more delusional than you had wanted to be.

Or maybe you did?

GOD MAKE UP YOUR MIND!

Vash, that was his name, was your boy-next-door crush. To be honest, you never expected to find yourself attracted to someone like him. But man, did he have your heart running its laps.

Every.

Single.

Time.

The glances he would sneak at you from afar felt like honey for your little ol' fragile heart. And no, you never forgot those frequent very frequent times where you would find him knocking at your door. Opening it, there he was, the cute tall spiky haired blonde awkwardly standing there with a flower pot, little flowers already growing inside.

Shifting his weight from his feet left to right, he would use the excuse of "I bought a bit too much for my balcony!" to keep giving them to you.

It was adorable! You never failed to blush every time and whenever he accidentally touched your hand when he handed them to you. You didn't notice his own red cheeks though.

You had a small collection of these plants in your home now that you made sure to water every morning. And as a thankful gesture, you often invited him over for dinner at your place.

That was....flirting right?

Jesus fucking christ you really had no rizz..

You often found yourself lying in bed some nights, not knowing how to address those bubbly feelings of yours towards the dorky man.

How would you tell him either way? How about a date?

Oh no no no, you didn't have the balls to tell it to his face... Did you?

You contemplated for a second.

Nope, definitely not.

If he said no, you would have to think about finding a different apartment at this point.

oh my goddd this was embarrassing..

But cmon now that cute mole on his face? How could you resist those funny faces of his? You groaned loudly into the air as you slapped your hands on your eyes in exasperation.

'What if I write him a letter?' You froze in your mini moment of despair before shooting up from your laid down position. "Okay, okay, maybe this can work." You gasped out, stumbling and slipping off your bed, looking around the room trying to find a pen and paper.

Pen..Pen..Digging out a pen from your bag, you held it up into the air as if it were a holy grail.

Settling with a nice purple colored one and a page from a notebook that you carefully tore out, you wrote your "confession" letter on that messy wooden desk of yours.

That'll do that job! please

By the next morning, you had the letter sealed and ready to be given to him, but damn were you on the verge of wanting to throw up because of how nervous you were.

You even added a cute dried flower on the letter to make it look pretty maybe he could ignore the little tear marks of yours on the note

Okay, go to his door, knock, give him the letter, then run.

PERFECT! Completely foul proof plan!

Wash, rinse, repeat.

You put on one of the more nicer outfits from your closet, and paced around your room a bit before finally leaving the apartment. Letter clenched in your hands, you walked only a few steps from your door until you saw the numbers 512 glaring down at you.

Ummm…

You felt sweatier than usual as you frantically brushed down your hair before straightening your posture. It took you only 2 minutes of self-reassurance before you knocked.

knock, knock, knock

Pulling your hand back, you stood there holding the letter into your chest.

...

...

No response. That's fine! That's totally okay!

You took a moment to breathe in and out before knocking again. Finally hearing movement from the other side of the door, you took a step back, bracing yourself from seeing his face as the door swung open.

"How can I help you?" A feminine voice rung out.

Opening the door was a blonde girl somewhat a bit older than you. Her long blonde hair and piercing blue eyes making you do a double take as your mouth gaped open at the pretty girl. But that surprise was taken over by your heart dropping at the sight. She was wearing a white sweat jacket

His jacket..

HE HAD A GIRLFRIEND!?

'ABORT! ABORT MISSION!' Your subconscious yelled at you as you stumbled to find words to reply to the girl "I-um, well uh-"

The burning feeling in your chest started to hurt as you felt the desire to just drop dead right on the spot. There was no way you just... Oh my god..

Before you could respond, the girl's expression widened into somewhat recognition. "Oh! You're the neighbor from next door! Were you looking for my brother?"

Eh?

"...Y-Yes?" You tilted your head in a somewhat cheeky sweaty smile you were dying on the inside before she turned from you and looked back into the apartment.

"HEY VASH!" She yelled, holding the door open with her back as she crossed her arms, and from the depths of the blue-wallpapered apartment nice choice! you heard his voice.

"WHAT!?" There were sounds of blankets or something moving coming from where he was inside.

Her eyes flickered back to you before giving you a playful wink "I think our neighbor from 511 is knocking at the door! Are they the-!"

"WAIT WAIT WAIT DON'T OPEN IT WAIT!!" His sudden screech emitted before the sudden mess of things falling to the ground and objects breaking echoed through the apartment.

Was he okay?

"GYAH!" You heard Vash yelp before he tripped into your sight right around a corner, shirt half messily on him as he attempted to slip his arm through the hole of the shirt. The scattered scars on his body prominent to your eyes as he struggled for a second.

Wow look at that bod-

You quickly averted your sight, feeling the heat crawling up your neck and into your cheeks as he picked himself off the ground as fast as he could with only one hand. You noted that he didn't have the time to put his prosthetic on in that sudden rush of his.

"T-thanks Tesla!" He breathed out, smoothing down his shirt as Tesla left her spot by the door, leaving it ajar as she gave you a small wave before leaving into the apartment and what you presumed back into her bedroom.

"Sorry about my older sister, she's just visiting for the week..." Vash cleared his throat before leaning his arm his only arm at the moment on the door frame, humorously deepening his voice "So, how can I help a beautiful person on this most wonderous night?"

You giggled at his try to hide whatever happened, the tense muscles in your shoulders softening as you silently held out the letter you had.

"Hm?" His eyebrow rose as he relaxed himself, slowly grabbing the red envelope out of your hand. Turning it around, he scanned the writing on the top.

To Vash

And attached to it, was a red geranium, one of the flowers he had gifted you. He couldn't help but give the envelope a blushed smile before looking back up to ask you what it was.

But there was no one?

"E-Eh?" He stuttered as he quickly stepped outside, only seeing a flash of your body running through your door as you shut it quick behind you.

Did... Did you just run back to your apartment?

Vash let out a pout as his shoulders slouched down, barefoot on the concrete floor of the apartment complex corridor.

"I missed the chance to say it.. Damn it.."

Meanwhile, you had shut the door and slowly slid down it, covering your mouth with your hand in amazement.

YOU DID IT!

YOU ACTUALLY DID IT! YES!

OH FUCK YOU DID IT.

ohhhh shit.

"what did I just do.." You groaned, pushing your knees up to bury your face into.

For the next couple of days, you tried your best to avoid Vash as much as you could. Taking all the early shifts at work, racing into your apartment whenever you saw him sitting at the picnic table with a bowl of strawberries.

Maybe he didn't feel the same way, how could you show your face to him? You were scared..What he would say?

Disgusting?

I'm interested in someone else?

That night was one that had you up late, running through all the things he could say about your letter, bad or good.

But one day. you had been forced to take the late night shift again and found yourself walking down one of the many apartment complex hallways alone. You actually kinda missed your lil nightly talks with him…

"Hey!"

Hm?

Turning your head to the left, you spotted the pretty blonde man, racing down the path in slippers, sweatpants and a long sleeve, no glasses of his in sight.

"V-VASH!?" You squawked out, the man closing in as in a panic, you closed your eyes. Feeling your back hit the hard wall behind you, you were only able to throw a hand out to put a cushion to whatever was happening.

What?

Slowly peeping your eyes open, your vision was covered by the sight of his chest. His large frame practically covering your body and both arms of his caging the sides of your head, most likely to prevent you from meekly escaping.

"I finally.." He let out a deep breath as the hot sensation of it lightly hit your face "..caught you." His gaze only focused on you as you noticed the grip you had on his firm shoulder. Ah... He was trying to talk to you again..

Did the letter not make anything awkward?

"Vash?" Your breath hitched, the intense stare of his eyes just on you making that stomach of yours develop butterflies once again.

"You never gave me the chance to give you an answer.." He muttered before chuckling "Didn't think it'd take me this long to finally see you."

Moving your gaze away and to the side, you tried to escape his eyes in attempt to calm yourself down "I thought I made things awkward...Ha." You gave him a small pained grin, the urge to cry out of humiliation was making the lump in your throat push upwards.

One more word out of you and you'll accidentally let it out, tears and all.

Vash looked down at you with a curious expression before the look of adoration riddled his face "Aw cmon now, look at me. You'll never make things awkward between the both of us..." Hand off the wall, he softly put two fingers under your chin, moving it so you looked back into those endless bright blue eyes of his.

"Ya know, you actually beat me to it first."

"I-I did?"

He gave you a cheeky smile "Definitely, I was gonna come over but.." The corners of his mouth moved downwards "I didn't get to see you anymore. Even after work, I made sure to wait a bit to spot ya. Guess today's my lucky day."

oh fuck, you felt so bad.

he…was actually looking for you.

shit.

"I-" You choked out, silencing Vash as you felt your eyes start to blur with the tears. You couldn't hold it in anymore. All those embarrassing moments and thoughts.

"I was scared about what you were gonna say... I thought you weren't going to like me anymore after that letter…” You tried to regulate your breathing as your furiously wiped the tears out of your eyes “Stupid right?”

Using both hands, Vash slowly took your hands away from your face, before swiping his thumb against the apples of your cheeks "Well, whatever you thought that was gonna do, did quite the opposite.."

Face to face, just centimeters away from each other.

"I like you even more.." His thumb brushing the bottom of your lips as you observed him, eyes still red from crying. But the red of Vash’s own cheeks got brighter and brighter.

"May I?"

And with no words spoken, you nodded and he caved, leaning in. You felt like melting as he wrapped his arms around your sides, those pink lips of his deeping into your own as the taste of mint seeped into your mouth.

The sweet taste of his was one you imagined at night, and have never thought to ever taste until now.

Now that you tasted him, it felt so intoxicating. Every touch of his tongue in your mouth, the grip he had on your waist.

Okay slow it down a little cowboy~

Pulling away for air, the both of you just stared at each-other, eyes wide and quiet.

Until laughter came about, Vash had started giggling and you tried your best to stifle your own until you couldn’t. And the two of you continued laughing as Vash kept you close in his embrace.

"I was wonderingg~" Vash whistled out after getting those cute giggles out of his system "Are you doing anything this Saturday?"

You tilted your head to the right, giving him a shy smile "Not necessarily, I was just gonna order some pizza and stay home alone.."

"Maybee..I can keep you company?" He jokingly puppy-eyed before you gave him peck on the lips just one more time

"Always~"

A sharp gasp was suddenly emitted from your right side, causing you to almost yelp in shock at the sudden disturbance as Vash whipped his head to the direction. And there stood your upstairs neighbor, an elderly hispanic lady and her husband with a little cart full of folded laundry.

"Mire! El chico del apartmento 512 se junto con el rentero de 511. Ay que bonito~" She cooed as her husband nodded in agreement.

You returned a blushed smile, feeling Vash's hand slip into your own.

Oh how sweet!

translation: Look! The boy from apartment 512 got together with the renter from 511. How pretty~

[anxious-witch]

I have this mental image in my head of Bojan meeting someone who he hates (who most likely hurt one of his friends (an ex or something)) and ends up being protective as fuck annnnddd starting a fist fight.

Or some Jance but its Bojan who's exposing their feelings to one another in a goofy cocky way (and later he's probably being chased by Kris with a newspaper, because he as getting entertained by looking at the two lovebirds being shy and awkward)

Or bottom Bojan with Kris... There's something wrong with me these days

Basically Bojan's stupid cocky shenanigans

Okay so I did the first prompt (and kind of implied the last at the very end), and I apologize, this was written on the phone and nit proofread so. Make of it what you will. I still hope you like it!

TW for fatphobia(from an OC not one of the boys) violence, slight description of blood and alcohol

Bojan was admittedly, a little tipsy. Which meant he had a little less control over his emotions than he'd usually have.

Which in turn, meant that when he saw a man invade Nace's space, despite Nace clearly being uncomfortable, he felt anger immediately shimmer under the surface.

He faintly heard a snippet of their conversation.

"Oh, Nacko, you change so much since we went to school together! Finally lost that weight, huh?"

Oh, no he did not. Bojan saw Nace flinch slightly at the comment. He grit his teeth and made sure to push through the crowd in the club until he was at Nace's side.

"Hello," he said, flashing his teeth in something resembling to a smile, "and who might you be?"

The man looked at Bojan suspiciously. He slightly towered over him, but then again, most men did. It particualrly didn't concern him. He looked skinny. And dumb.

"I am Nace's friend from high school!"

Right. Judging by Nace's face, friend was a generous title. Bojan narrowed his eyes.

"What did you say your name was?"

"Marko. Yours?"

"Bojan."

Marko. Wasn't that the guy Nace mentioned bullying him in high school? Bojan wanted to seethe.

"Right, Bojan, of course! You are the main vocalist. I remember now. Guess you guys got pretty famous, huh?"

Bojan crossed his arms over his chest and stepped forward, making sure to insert himself between Nace and the bully.

"Bojan. Don't," Nace whispered softly, quiet enough for only Bojan to hear.

Which did make him hesitate. He didn't want Nace to be more uncomfortable, after all. So he swallowed his rage and tried to put up a charming facade.

"I guess we did."

"Never thought Nace would be a part of something like that. Do you know what we called him in high school?"

He felt Nace tense behind him. Rage hit Bojan square in the chest, and he forgot about not wanting to make a scene.

"I would recommend not saying it. Ever."

Marko didn't seem to have gotten a message, or detected his tone. He laughed, making a dismissing gesture with his hand.

"Oh, com'on now. It was all in good fun. You seem like you were popular, even back in high school. You know how things work."

What kind of piece of shit would-Bojan took a deep breath. He let his hands fall from where he was crossing them over his chest to his sides. Then he clenched them into fists.

"I do," he said, very calmly, "would you like to see how I dealt with people talking shit about my friends?"

He didn't wait for an answer. He swung at him, as hard as he could, and heard as his fist collided with his nose in a satisfying crack.

Then all hell broke loose.

Nace tried to pull him back, but Marko managed to punch him in the jaw, and Bojan taste blood from a slip lip. He attempted to push against Nace to give another punch, but Nace didn't budge.

Just in time for the bouncers to arrive and very firmly escort them out. Marko swore at them, saying he didn't even start the fight. Which looked ridiculous with their heigh difference. And Bojan did ocassionly use the influence he had to get his way.

"A bit of an obsessive fan, that one. Sorry for the trouble," he whispered to the closest bouncer.

He got a nod of understanding in response and they actually let him go, while they continue escorting Marko out. Bojan made sure to flash a quick grin in his directon.  Which prompted  new wave of swearing, before it got drowned out by the the music.

"What did you do now?" Kris asked sharply just behind him.

Bojan turned around to face his very annoyed boyfriend.

"He was mean to Nace!"

Kris raised an eyebrow. He didn't look very impressed. Bojan did his best not to pout.

"He is telling the truth," Nace said, making Bojan jump.

When did he come around? Hmm. Maybe Bojan was a bit more tipsy than he thought.

Well. That was a thought for later. For now...Bojan threw his hands around Nace, pulling him into a hug.

"I will fight all the bullies for you!"

Nace chuckled and returned the hug. Bojan leaned his head on his chest. He really did give the best hugs.

"As much as I appreciate that, I'd prefer you in one peace. He did get you good with that punch. That's probably gonna bruise."

"Where?"

Bojan groaned at Kris' question and lightly slapped Nace's shoulder.

"Look what you did! He is going to go all mom friend on me now!"

Nace simply rolled his eyes and withdrew from the hug.

"Perhaps that would stop you from getting into fights more often."

Bojan pouted and was about to say something about how much Nace actually appreciated being defended, when Jure yelled Nace's name.

"Nace! Jan is arguing with someone over math problems again!"

Nace sighed.

"I better go, before that turns into a fist fight, too."

Then he left, leaving Bojan at Kris' mercy. Kris, who pulled him to the quieter corner, where there weren't so many people.

"Let me see that bruise."

Kris gently raised his chin so he could look at it. If he could see anything with the club's flashing lights.

"Tehnically, it's unlikely the bruise already formed-"

"Just be quiet for a minute, for the love of god."

Bojan closed his mouth with a click. He knew it was due to the alcohol that his emotions were this unstable, but he suddenly became aware of just how much Kris must be annoyed with him.

"Hey," Kris said, his voice softer, "I didn't mean-you just worried me, that's all. How about we go to my place so I can take a proper look at that?"

Not everyone understood his and Kris' relationship, saying they always bickered. What they didn't understand was that, as much as they bickered, it was never intentionally hurtful. And sure, sometimes some lines were crossed, but they always apologized for it.

Bojan looked up at him and smiled. Colorful lights reflected in Kris' blue eyes and Bojan felt as starstruck as he did everytime he gave himself time to think "Holy shit, this guy is my boyfriend".

"Did I ever tell you that you have very pretty eyes?"

Kris rolled his pretty eyes at him. Rude.

"Yes. On an almost regular basis. Now let's get you home, okay?"

Bojan pouted.

"Don't I at least get a kiss for that?"

Kris shot him a glare, but Bojan could see the softness underneath it. So he got on his tiptoes and wrapped his arms around Kris' neck, reaching for his lips. Kris met him halfway.

The kiss started soft and sweet, but quickly turned more passionate as Kris pressed on the cut on his lip. Bojan moaned and pulled him closer.

It was only when Bojan pulled on Kris' hair that the younger broke the kiss and stepped back.

"Let's try not to give everyone a show in the club."

Bojan grinned.

"Does that mean I get a reward for being a good friend when we do get home?"

Kris pressed his lips together and walked towards the door without an answer. Bojan laughed as he ran after him.

Perhaps tonight was a complete waste, after all.

[dysco-lymonade]

What about a silly 3 men and a baby type fic except it's just Clexa somehow getting an infant forced on them out of the blue and then falling in love while figuring out how to care for the kid. Or maybe you could do one where one gets a letter not meant for her and it's from the other. The rest is up to you😂

I will be affectionately referring to this AU as 2Girls1Baby until I think of, or am recommended a new title.

This is a work in progress, but I wanted to give you a little snippet, Anon, because this AU is living in my head rent-free now.

A little back story. Raven and Anya have an 18 month old baby, and they have to go out of town. Their last resort for childcare is leaving their daughter, Tris, with Clarke and Lexa.

Clarke and Lexa have been roommates for a while now, really only knowing each other through Anya and Raven. Anya is Lexa's sister; Raven is Clarke's best friend. They live together, but don't really associate aside from that.

“So what now?” Clarke looks at Lexa, perplexed.

“Well, I guess we'll just keep her alive until Monday. That won’t be too hard… Right?” Lexa searches for comfort in Clarke’s gaze, receiving nothing of the sort.

“Anya is your sister! This is your problem.” Clarke gestures toward the 18 month old in the car seat currently chilling on their living room floor, kicking her feet at a dangling raccoon that is attached to the handle of her carrier.

“Raven is your best friend!” Lexa scolds in a hushed voice, not wanting to disturb the currently occupied toddler.

“Blood is thicker than water, right?” Clarke scoffs and walks away, to close herself up in her bedroom as per usual.

With a heavy sigh, Lexa cautiously approaches the toddler. “Hey, Tris.” She mumbles, “I’m your Aunt Lexa, we’re going to be great friends.” Suddenly, Tris realizes that neither of her mothers are within sight.

A wail that Lexa is surprised didn’t shatter their windows, falls from Tris’s mouth.

“Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, no. Shh- Shh, it's okay sweetheart. You’re okay. Aunt Lexa’s got you. We’re going to have so much fun…” Lexa searches around the living room, desperate to find something to occupy this kid’s attention. Anya had warned her that they were trying to limit her time with electronics, so she wouldn’t become reliant on them. The TV was out of the question.

Lexa whips her phone out of her pocket, scrolls through Spotify, and comes across a Disney playlist. She turns it on, and connects the phone to the bluetooth speaker in the living room.

“HAKUNA MATATA WHAT A WONDERFUL PHRASE” comes out entirely too loud, and only makes Tris cry harder.

“Shit, shit, shi- shoot, shoot, crap, dang it.” Lexa silences her phone. “Okay, maybe a bit more preparation for that, eh? Okay, so, find the speaker… where is it? Oh, there it is!” She locates the bluetooth speaker next to the television. “Now to turn the volume down, huh? That was wayyyy too loud. Aunt Clarke must have been in the zone the last time she was painting.” Lexa continues to ramble to herself, not realizing until she pulls her phone back out that Tris has stopped her wailing.

“Oh. You’re a conversationalist, are you?” She asks with a cheeky grin towards the 18 month old. She puts on the Disney playlist, on a low volume for background noise.

“Did your Mamas tell you the shi- crap I’ve been going through at work?” She waits a beat, Tris looks at her with big, bloodshot eyes, from her crying fit. 

“No? Okay, so let me just tell you. My boss,” she clears her throat and takes on a comedic Renaissance accent, “Executive Chef, Charles Pike, total idiot,” Lexa then resumes her regular speaking voice, “decided today that he was going to have a five course meal planned for the Water’s wedding tomorrow.” She scoffs.

Tris just babbles along while kicking her raccoon and eyeing Lexa suspiciously. 

“Exactly, that’s what I said. And then Pike has the gall to walk over to me and ask me to get it done by the end of the day, like I don’t already have 42 things on my plate. Because this man has made weaponized incompetence into a fuc-freaking art form.”

“Truck truck truck?” Tris all but screams at Lexa.

“You’re totally right, I should’ve told him to walk in front of a truck.”

"Truck, truck, TRUUUCK” Tris starts to wail.

“Truck? Where is the truck?” Lexa starts to rummage through her diaper bag. “Oh god, WHERE IS THE TRUCK?!”

In her panic, Lexa doesn’t realize that Clarke had emerged from her bedroom, and is currently walking towards Tris with a small yellow Tonka truck in her hands.

“Is this what you want, baby girl?” Clarke coos.

Lexa’s head snaps to attention and finds Clarke currently knelt next to her niece, shaking the truck slowly in front of her face. Tris has stopped crying, and currently has her full attention on Clarke’s hands.

“Clarke?” 

“Don’t mention it, I was just tired of hearing you talk about work.” Her roommate quips back, and then starts making vrooming truck noises to occupy the toddler.

“You don’t have to do this, Clarke. I am more than capable of-”

She’s cut off by Clarke, “Babysitting should be about more than just surviving, don’t we deserve better than that?”

Lexa gapes at her, unsure how to respond. 

“I might be a hypocrite, Lexa. But you’re a liar. You have no idea what you’re doing taking care of a baby.” Clarke jests with a raised eyebrow.

“I didn’t lie to everyone, not you.” She mumbles quietly.

“Well, if you care about me, and Tris, you’ll go make a bottle for her. I think she’s hungry.” Clarke retorts, a bit softer than she had been previously.

[atrial-ofhorror-if]

Hey, y'all! It's that time of the month again~~ Time for a monthly update!! 

I want to start this off with checking in on you guys. How's everyone doing? The year just started but it just feels like time is moving so fast already. I hope that this year will be much kinder to us all than it has been 🙏🏿🙏🏿 last year really tried to knock my dome top off, but I'm still here, so thats something. Let's all do our best, and kick or at least bruise the universes ass!

Clerical Updates

I have some changes that I'm planning for the Itch.io page, guys 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿First thing first, I want to change the game's title screen. I had initially made it in Canva with the aid of a friend from work, but as I continue to work through the game, I feel like there could be a much more fitting image. However, your girl isn't a graphic designer, so I want to commission someone to make a header or some shit.

Then I want to add a game starting page into the actual demo. I’ve looked at some examples from other IF writers who have made one, but I think my code is wrong (as it usually is), so I’m pacing back and forth trying to figure out exactly how and what I’m doing wrong. stay tuned for the shenanigans, cause I bet its something super simple 🙃🙃

I've been slowing down in writing. I typically write in my Google docs app on my phone, it's easier than opening my laptop, but the app has been having hella issues. I think it's because of the document size, so it's been significantly slowing down my writing time. I've been looking into alternative apps, so if anyone has recommendations, let me know. 

Game Progress

 I am officially at 60k+ words!!  

To be well (Alex’s Route): 49%

Search and Destroy (Mark's Route): <1%

Interlude (Intermission): 4%

So far, I have three big scenes left to write in Alex’s route. 

North Wing. Nuff said.

Convergent: not to be confused with divergence

Isekai? Isekai. 

Once I've written those scenes out, the rest will be smooth sailing. I just have ends to tie up and scenes to flesh out before I can finally push it into editing. I might do some of the fleshing out during editing to make it easier on myself (and to give myself a break), but I am just trying to go with the flow.

Once I push the game into editing, I'll take a break before I start on Mark's route. I'm still dealing with fatigue from Miss Rona despite having the same progress I had before I got sick but it just feels... weird. Like your girl is trapped in a slumber or something and I can't get out, but now I'm being anecdotal.

Back onto topic.

I want to talk about Mark's route for a moment. Because it truly is the bane of my existence, and I'm DREADING having to write it. I have three possible ways of how I want to deal with it:

Write the damn thing out, and stop bitching. Not ideal

Don't write it and be great 😤😤😤 most ideal

Release Alex's route once done with editing and worry about Mark at a later date. also not ideal cause then I have to come back to it! 🥴🤧😭

So, the last option is something I'm looking at real disrespectfully. Partially because I'm probably going to have to rewrite some of the subplots because when I plotted the outline for the entire episode, I had a precise idea of what was to occur. But Alex's route completely shifted from what was supposed to be there into something that I don't even recognize. Which isn't a bad thing, just… an inconvenience 🥴🥴

Therefore a lot of things that were supposed to happen just didn't. Which, again, isn't a bad thing. It just means that I need to reign the plot in again. I could finesse a lot of the content to make it flow, BUT that will take me some time.

So, in short... I still don't know what I'm gonna do!! 😭😭 but I probably will end up writing Mark's route cause I don't want to end up shorting you guys on content just cause I'm feeling lazy.

This episode has a LOT of variety in it. Like, I'm not even bullshitting. I'm aiming to make it so that you guys can replay it as often as you desire and still find new things you would have missed. (To make up for the fact that episode 2 probably won't be released until next year if we're being honest 🥴🥴)

The interlude isn't even something I'm thinking about at the moment. Partially because I'm trying to push through Episode 1, get done with Alex's Route and start on Mark's. A portion of it will still be in the update, but I'm debating if its going to be even smaller than what I intended it to be. Possibly? But again, I'm not so much of a planner as much as I am a 'go with the flow'er.

I'm hoping to drop pieces of the interlude this year until it's whole, instead of just writing the entire thing, cause I swear I'm not doing this shit again, lol 🤣🤣. Either way, I will keep you guys updated if anything changes.

I think that's it? If you guys have any questions, you know what to do. And if you need anything, let me know! I'm semi-available (not really) on the weekdays so I'll try to answer any asks as quickly as I can. But either way, love y'all 🤎🤎

[seasonal-writes]

If you want to, please elaborate on tango and impulse... their dynamic is so so good<3

-🍂

well i meaaan.. if you really wannaa heaaar.. cracks knuckles SO. essentially, if it wasn't obvious, Tango and Impulse have been attached at the hip for a LOOOONG time in this canon. Impulse's official "title" is like, Personal Guard to the Heir. His only assignment, unless stated otherwise, is to ensure Tango's safety and well-being—meaning they practically "grew up" together because he was constantly tailing him and keeping watch. so you can imagine they know each other veeery well, because Tango's had Impulse as a guard for like, ten or so years? they're genuine friends, of course! best friends, i'd even say, asss tango was actually lowkey a recluse/kinda sheltered? so he'd interact with whoever he had in the castle's vicinity in the Nether, and that happened to be Impulse. so this random, older kid's assigned as his guard and tango's like "it's free real estate" and YES they used to get into trouble together. Impulse has turned his head at maaany of Tango's shenanigans, and Tango never stood for Impulse being punished for anything by higher ups. And when they tried to find Tango someone else after too many convenient "I just wasn't paying attention"'s from Impulse, Tango had a melt. down. That was the first time Impulse ever saw Tango have a real moment of rage, and you can imagine that there were more than just a few scorched painting to deal with, and that Impulse was immediately re-instated as his personal guard. i was actually JUST talking to a friend of mine about how it's canon that Impulse is a few years older than Tango, and he was given this position while training to be an official knight. so i always look SO FONDLY on the image of a tall and quiet, awkward young Impulse with a training sword next to an equally-as-awkward teenage Tango at like, parties and events 'n things. we were making jokes that Tango turns to him like "You gotta start talkin' to some people, buddy. You look too scary." and Impulse is just like "I don't get paid enough to talk to people." It's so funny to me, and that definitely says a TON about their dynamic. Impulse is definitely still quiet, but they're very chatty in private moments—which I tried to capture in chapter six. Impulse is literally a shadow when he's around more than just his prince, and i love the aesthetic of that claim with his blackstone armor and wallflower tendencies. But if there is even a slight change in Tango's tone to indicate discomfort, he's hovering right behind him with a glint in his eye and his weapon drawn. He's also bulkier and a little taller than Tango, too. So he's intimidating as hell.<33 ANYWAY. they're very close. and while Tango might not see it all the time, Impulse is insanely devoted to him. Like, Impulse would die before he let Tango get hurt, he'd break any rule and go to jail before even a hair on his head was disturbed. It's your usual Knight and Prince dynamic, but instead they're long-time best friends and the selflessness is cranked up to an 11. I also have this idea that Impulse doesn't know what he'll do without Tango to watch over. Sure, position change. Sure, there will be changes. But his purpose has been one thing for so long, and i'm sure the idea of Tango running away would be wildly devastating to him. so uh. do with this information what you will. i love them so much and i'd fully recommend sitting and thinking about all the scenarios of two goofy childhood buddies being put into things beyond their age, but still having each other at the end of the day. Or defending each other. Or just being soft pals. i'm so normal about them, can't you tell?

i'm also SO sorry for how long this is, holy cow. i just get very excited about all the characters and these two are a special case to me.

[yukiakaren]

Kpop title track ranking: B1A4

In this series I’ll be ranking kpop groups/soloists title tracks based on my taste.

I watched B1A4's episode on Pangterview and realized that I could do this ranking for their songs! Admittedly, I've only actively listened to a couple of their songs a lot throughout the years, but I've been aware of them for many years and I was already familiar with all the title tracks. Hence, I felt like ranking these songs.

Like a Movie - Let's start by saying when I first heard this one it didn't click with me. However, after a while it did and I can't deny that I'm in love with it now. The movie or musical feel of it has me captivated. It's so so pretty!

Tried To Walk - This one is a classic. Also, in comparison to some of their other older songs the lyrics are quite problem-free which is a huge plus. And this being my favorite song of theirs for the longest time makes this ranking make a lot of sense. Also, the MV is gorgeous!

A Lie - It's just a lovely break up song. I guess the nostalgia I have with Tried To Walk gives it the tiny notch to be ranked higher than this.

Rewind - Rewind is going down very similar path to Like a Movie but just isn't quite as good. But still very pleasant!

Sweet Girl - I guess this is the obligatory surprise of the list. I have always past this song as something fine but not given it much more thought. But now listening to it and comparing it to the rest, it definitely showed the goodness of it in a whole new way. It's in the best possible way "just pleasant".

Baby I'm Sorry - Despite the mostly nonsensical English, overall mediocre lyrics and A TON of autotune, I can't ignore my nostalgia for this one. It was one of the first B1A4 songs that I liked and right now I let that nostalgia cloud my judgement a bit in order to ignore those issues.

Rollin' - Very of that time, tropical sounding song. A fine one but I think I'm quite over this type of sound at least when it's not currently summer.

O.K - Upbeat song about being absolutely whipped for someone. Nice debut but not my personal favorite of theirs.

Beautiful Target - The song that gave such an iconic line "Oh my beautiful target. You zoom zoom my heart like a rocket." doesn't quite get me going otherwise.

Solo Day - I just don't really get much out of this one. It's pleasant enough and the lyrics aren't a disgrace but I just don't care for it.

Lonely - This one just hasn't ever really been one I'd go for either. And I guess it's somehow more annoying than Solo Day for me. Unarguably better lyrics-wise than the next ones, so it ends up above them.

What's Happening? - "What's happening?" is what I want to ask from these lyrics. Like seriously. Is this about the other person cheating or just jealousy over someone you are not with? Which ever it is, it's not great.

Baby Good Night - So, it's a upbeat song about cheating on your partner, right? I was vaguely aware that this one has issues but oh my. Yeah, bottom spot is absolutely deserved here.

And here we come to the end of the list and to the spot I usually put b-sides as honorable mentions. I am well-versed enough to know their title tracks but I have to admit that I don't think I knew any of their b-sides before today. Now quickly taking a look at their albums all the songs seem quite nice and chill. DIVING got multiple listens from me immediately, so this one I can definitely recommend!

[esoehh]

Sycamore Circle (The Rumors in Ross County Series Book 2) by Shelley Shepard Gray

Book Details: 

Title:  Sycamore Circle

Series: The Rumors in Ross County Book 2

Author: Shelley Shepard Gray

Publisher:  Blackstone Publishing

Pages:  296

Release Date:  February 7, 2023

Genre:  Romance

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Book Description:

There’s a lot going on in Joy Howard’s life. She’s got an ex-husband who starts acting like he doesn’t want to be an ex anymore, a sixteen-year-old daughter in need of a guiding hand and a lot of rides to dance practice, more orders for paintings than she has time to paint, and a roster of tutoring clients who sometimes need far more than she can give.

What she doesn’t have is time for a new relationship.

Samuel “Bo” Beauman is a lot of things. He’s a counselor for transitioning ex-cons, a good friend to many, a construction worker, a brother and son, and even a part-time model for a high-end sportswear catalog. He’s also a man searching for redemption.

One thing he isn’t is a man in need of a girlfriend.

But none of that seems to matter when Bo hears Joy’s kind voice in a crowded coffee shop. He instantly knows she’s someone he wants to know better. The two of them hit it off—much to the dismay of practically everyone they know—but Bo doesn’t care what other people think. He feels at peace whenever he’s with Joy, and he won’t let her go without a fight.

When Joy starts getting mysterious texts and phone calls from unknown numbers, she tries to ignore it. But instead of going away, the messages escalate and Joy realizes she can’t handle it alone. But she is juggling a jealous ex-husband, a handful of students with little to lose, and a brand-new boyfriend who spent several years behind bars. Who can she trust?

My Thoughts:  Wow!

Wow! I don't even know where to begin. Sycamore Circle is just another example of author Shelley Shepard Gray's amazing writing. She has once again blown me away with another fantastic story. 

Joy and Bo's story captivated my heart, and I especially loved hearing tough guy Bo using terms of endearment. (sigh) Joy and Bo each have a caring heart, but their background stories are so different. Those differences, their feelings and their uncertainties about a relationship made their story so endearing and kept me guessing just how their relationship would evolve. 

The romance was just one of the things that made this such a great story. Entwined with the romance is intrigue, mystery, suspense, a light message of faith and some really great secondary characters. No element overpowers another making this a perfect combination that kept me glued to the pages. 

Sycamore Circle is a truly amazing story and a great addition to the Rumors in Ross County Series. Even though it is part of a series, it contains plenty of background information from book one, Edgewater Road, that it can be read as a stand alone. It is a great read and one that I highly recommend. 

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing me with a complimentary copy of this book. All comments and opinions are strictly my own. 

         ------------------------------------------------------------

About the Author: Shelley Shepard Gray 

Shelley Shepard Gray is a NYT and USA Today bestselling author. She's published over a hundred novels and has over a million books in print. She currently lives in northern Ohio and writes full time.

Shelley lives just an hour from Holmes County, where many of her Amish-themed novels are set. She currently writes contemporary romance and Amish fiction for a variety of publishers. When not spending time with her family or writing, she can usually be found walking her two dachshunds on one of the many trails in the Cleveland area.

She also bakes a lot, loves coconut cream pie, and will hardly ever pull weeds, mow the yard, or drive in the snow.

Shelley also spends a lot of time on line! Please visit her website, https://shelleyshepardgray.com/ to find out her latest news or to sign up for her newsletter. Shelley can also be found on: 

FaceBook https://www.facebook.com/ShelleyShepardGray?fref=ts  

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/shelley.s.gray/?hl=en 

Twitter https://twitter.com/ShelleySGray

[alleycat-arcade]

Game Start! The Seven Lords (Choice Time! Minigame)

@rayanicaraynbow asked: I know you aren't even done with my last request, but I was thinking... Fluff/crack HCs of the brothers reacting to someone trying to make MC make a decision, and MC replying with something like "I'm Genderfluid, Pansexual, and Polyamorous- I've never made a decision, and I don't intend to start now!" And this is how they come out lol. If you don't wanna do that scenario, you can just do MC just randomly coming out, out of nowhere. Have a great day/night/etc. :)

There we are, the programming should be all good now. The minigame you were trying to play should be running smoothly, but let me know if there's any glitches if you find any.

(Here we are! Sorry that this is a little shorter than my usual hc's, but I didn't want to add any unnessesscary fluff that made them confusing or derailed them. Big thanks to my genderfluid friend Elle for helping me write these lol. For better context, the polyam aspect is based off on of my old relationships. The sexuality and gender aspects aren't too major, but I wanted to make sure I wrote it as good as I could! I took my time with it so I could make sure I didn't write anything that might upset someone haha.)

Why Choose? (Obey Me! Brothers x Genderfluid! Pansexual! Polyamorous! Reader/Mc) (Forgive me for the long title jfosidfjf, couldn't think of a way to condense it)

Content Warnings: General fluff/crack and a surprise coming out of the closet! Actually a little less crack-ish then the original ask may have intended, and more goes along the line of heartfelt acceptance and support. This is real LGBTQ+ loving hours baby. Any input from those who are part of these groups is always accepted by the way! If you feel this is inaccurate in any way and want to suggest some changes, I'm all ears! :)

⚝──⭒─⭑─⭒──⚝

Lucifer:

Shopping trips with Lucifer were always an enjoyable, albeit somewhat rare, experience. It was always nice to get the Eldest out of the house and away from his work for a while, even if you were just going out to pick up some groceries.

As expected of a house of 5 demons, 1 particularly ravenous demon, and a human, you had quite the long list of groceries ahead of you. Honestly, it was surprising that the list didn't hit the ground and start rolling out of the store when you opened it. You could recognize a fair amount of the items since you'd gone grocery shopping before. Hell coffee, family pack sushi, shadow hog meat, mermaid splash, that sorta stuff.

The one thing that did surprise you however was a single item written in scratchy black ink, reading "Stuff for Mc". With the way it had been so hastily written down it was hard to pinpoint which of the Brothers had wrote it, but according to Lucifer the list had been created by both Mammon and Belphegor. That item in particular was actually the reason he'd asked you to accompany him originally, since apparently neither of the two had came and asked you what you would've wanted added to the grocery list.

What triggered your surprise admission was not your companion however, rather a very pushy sales attendant. For the most part, before encountering the attendant, the trip was uneventful. Lucifer made you aware that he trusted you enough to not give you a spending limit, and let you buy whatever you liked. But as luck may have it, you ran into one of the store's employees in the middle of grabbing some Super Spicy Newt Chips for Beel.

They were trying to get to to take a survey on customer satisfaction and asking for any recommendations for any products to begin stocking on the shelves that they didn't already carry. While that perhaps may not have been an issue if you were the more extroverted type, the entire form had been written in Infernal and they only wanted food from the Devildom as suggestions. You continually backed away and tried to excuse yourself from the conversation, but they continued to hound you to the point that there was no denying that they were doing it deliberately.

You were debating calling out for Lucifer or summoning him using the pact when the phrase had absentmindly slipped out of your mouth, somehow at the same time that you backed straight into the demon you were looking for. He let out a noise upon impact that drew your attention to turn and look at him, but Lucifer simply let out a sigh and asked the attendant to leave you be. Once the lesser demon had scurried away with their tail between their legs, the Avatar of Pride was quick to take your hand and led you back to the already full cart.

Your mind had grown restless as you stood in the checkout line, eyes darting this way and that way. Had he heard what you said? There's no way he couldn't have, he was literally right behind you. But then why wasn't he responding at all?

As another anxious thought bubbled to the surface, you felt Lucifer's hand return to lace into yours in the middle of paying, using the pad of his thumb to rub soothing circles into the back of your hand. Your heart fluttered slightly at the sudden subtle display of affection, enough to distract you of those thoughts until you had loaded up the groceries and were in the car.

Lucifer had been the one to bring it up again, turning down the car radio and clearing his throat. "What you said to that attendant, was that true?" It was hard to indicate any particular feelings from his tone, but you fought against your nerves and decided to tell him the truth. "Yes. I am genderfluid, pansexual, and polyamorous." "Have you told anyone else, Mc?" He hummed. "...No. You're the first." "Well, I'm honored to be the first one you've come out to about this Mc. If you ever need anything relating to your gender or sexuality to make you feel more comfortable, do let me know, alright?" "You're not upset about it?" Your response elicited a more boisterous laugh than you usually heard out of the Eldest, but he calmed down quickly and gazed over at you with a fond smile. "Mc, while those sorts of things may be viewed as unnatural or something to hold in disdain for some humans, it's actually rather commonplace amongst demons. I'm pretty sure if you told that line from the store at a Comedy Bar around here, you'd have the audience howling with laughter. It's quite the relatable line."

He's very understanding if you're still not ready to come out to anyone else yet, and unlike some of his brothers Lucifer's very good at keeping secrets. At times he might subtly drop hints to get his brothers on the topic of it between themselves to show you that they'll support you as well when you're ready. Luci also starts looking into some stuff that might help you feel more comfortable in your own skin if you haven't already. He's very subtle about dropping off the items as well, usually leaving them on your dresser while you're busy with something else.

(No one will ever shit talk you unless they value their status of being alive.)

Mammon:

Just about everyone in the Devildom was aware of Mammon's crush on you and how desperate he could be sometimes for your attention, even if said demon would never admit it. With it being exam season, that only gave him even more of an excuse to be around you. It didn't matter if he was really good at a subject or you were really bad in one, Mammon was desperate to squeeze in any study daaaa- study times! with you before his brothers could steal you away.

Luckily, the subject Mammon had asked you to help you with that night was something at least somewhat easy for you. You had an advantage in your Human History classes over most other students at RAD seeing as you had grown up in the Human World your whole life, so that made you one of the best people in HOL besides Satan to ask for help on the subject. Even if History hadn't been your strong suit before, the majority of the lessons were pretty much baseline knowledge you already learned in Middle and High school, with the occasional spike in difficulty.

Usually you and Mammon would trade off helping one another with their school work anyway, with him doing most of the help revolving around Mathematics, Seductive Speechcraft, and Infernal 201, and you helping with the rest. Needless to say, you weren't surprised when you found the Avatar of Greed waiting in your room after you had left to get a quick snack, sitting on your bed with his thick textbook in hand.

The majority of your study time that night had been just you sitting together on your bed, with you explaining certain concepts and literary definitions while he would nod along and take a few notes. This part of your miniature lessons was by far the easiest for your Guardian Demon, since he could ask you any question he wanted and have you explain something far better than any of the teachers at RAD would've. Although the next part was somewhat easy as well if he made decent notes, since it was a practice test that you let him use them on, he did not look forward at all to the ending point. Once you were certain that he was ready, you would set up a practice test for him that he couldn't use notes or the textbook on. While you agreed that this wasn't really the best way of testing someone on information, it was the same as you did for your exams at RAD.

When the phrase had left your mouth, you had been sitting idly by as he was in the middle of a particularly hard question. Off the top of your head you couldn't remember the exact question or complaint, just that he was upset about picking in between stances of different sides of a war for an exam question. You weren't necessarily allowed to even talk to him while he was testing, but you couldn't help yourself from say the snarky comment. It wasn't until you had already said it did you realize that exact phrase.

Mammon is silent for a moment, before turning to you with a confused expression. "Really?" "...Yes?" "Ah, cool. Do whatever ya want with yer life in your free time though, human. If I don't pass this test Lucifer's gonna take away Goldie and my car!" Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, in more confusion than the demon had previously had written across his face. "That's your reaction to me coming out?" "Ah wait, this is one a' those things that humans make a whole party out of, yeah? Let's ditch these dumb study books and hit the-" As he tried to push the chair back and stand up, you caught his shoulder and pressed him back into a seated position. "No Mammon."

After the practice test was over and done with, you commented on his very light surprise at your confession. In response he just shrugged, saying that he's met quite a few people who were either genderfluid, pansexual, polyamorous, all of the above, and more. Not just in the Devildom either, but in the Human World and Celestial Realm as well. He is however very happy to hear that he's the first person you've come out to, yet another thing to brag about to his brothers! Oh, you're not ready yet? Fiiiine, the Great Mammon can keep your secret for a little while longer, so be grateful he's so courteous! But genuinely, if there's something you really don't want anything to know that you've shared with him, he'll take it to his grave. Mammon may be a loud mouth, but he cares deeply enough for you that he doesn't want you getting upset.

He's not particularly the best with asking you about the things you want, so most of the stuff that you may need or want you'll need to either tell him up front or hint at subtly. Just leave a few things in your Akuzon cart overnight and leave your D.D.D. unlocked in a place easy to reach after mentioning something about online shopping, and they'll be laid out on your dresser within minutes. Something he has given you that he didn't get off of Akuzon is some handmade pronoun bracelets, which he made after seeing some people on Devilgram showing off theirs. The first couple batches were messy and unkempt, so he kept making them until they looked professional quality. If you ask him where he got them though, he'll probably just say Akuzon or deny being your secret gift giver.

(Threatens to beat the shit out of anyone who judges you.)

Leviathan:

With how often Leviathan would invite you into his room for a gaming or session, one would be concerned if he didn't have you over at least every other day. As such, you were getting a little worried about the otaku since it had been a week since you last hung out together. But as it turned out, he had actually been planning a surprise for you! A brand new game from a series that he loved had just came out that day, and he had spent the whole week preparing his room to play it with you. This particular installment in the series allowed main campaign Co-Op mode, and he could hardly contain his excitement.

When you saw the first series of garbled texts pop up in your notification bar, you knew he was excited about something. The amount of key smashes, caps lock, and misspelled words was very similar to the way he typed when something about his favorite anime, game, or idol came out and did something he viewed as extraordinary, and with how frequently those sorts of things happened you had gained an eye for it. Eventually he was able to get out what he wanted to say, along with sending you a picture of the game's box. The box art itself kind of reminded you of a few Human World games you'd seen in the past, but everything else about it just screamed Devildom. Shrugging, you sent Levi a text to let him know you'd be on your way over and set your D.D.D. down to get ready.

You didn't need to do anything more than knock on the door once you had gotten there, because it appeared that the Avatar of Envy had already been waiting for you behind it. Eagerly, he led you into the room by your sleeve and to his desktop, where he had already set up his second gaming chair for you, custom Henry pillow and all. Surprisingly a lot of the floor space in his room had been cleaned up and put away, and his bedtub had been pushed back enough to create a decent amount of space in the center of the room. Levi was already explaining the game, it's basic storyline, and all of the features to you as you had been looking around the room, and from what it sounded like it was a VR RPG game set in some sort of steampunk world.

After he had finished explaining it to you, he slid the disc into his PC so it could download properly. You had been expecting to wait a good chunk of time, maybe 15-30 minutes or so, for a game of that size to finish downloading, but you weren't 3 minutes into a different conversation with your beloved snake boy about something else when the download completion noise cut you off. Devildom technology frequently flipped between higher quality than Human stuff to lower quality, so you were a bit surprised that he had a computer with such a fast download speed.

Your legs swung idly as you watched him boot up the game, chuckling lightly as another download started and he groaned. Eventually, he had gotten past the start up screen and the game sent you straight into something Leviathan forgot to mention. A character creation screen.

It's not that you were against the idea of designing your own in-game character, far from it honestly, but you were a little nervous to do it in front of your boy- no, best-, no, Lord of Shadows? Lord of Shadows. The majority of options and features in most character creators were often gender specific, and you would have to choose a gender before you could begin. Staring at your half of the split screen, the text box seemed to stare back at you is it requested your character's gender.

Leviathan could see the way you were squirming in your chair from the corner of his eye, stopping in the middle of making his own character to look at your own screen. He was confused why you were stuck on such a specific part, and asked if you were having trouble deciding. Too focused on thinking, you spoke the phrase while toying with your controller's joystick. Before you could react though, Leviathan nodded and pointed to the option's drop-down menu.

"Yeah, there's more than just the basic male and female options if you just select this bit here. And the game will let you change it at anytime. Plus you can self-adjust a lot of the details of your character after this so it suits you better. Not to mention-" "Levi." You cut him off, staring at him with a wide-eyed look. "Hm?" "Did you realize what I just said?" "Yeah, that you were Genderfluid, Pan and Poly right?" His eyebrows knitted together looking at you reaction before it slowly dawned on him. "W-wait, did you not mean to come out to me just yet? I get if you didn't, but I don't judge you at all or anything! As my, uh, one and only Henry, you have my full support in every aspect!"

While he has also know quite a few demons and angels with similar circumstances as you, Levi's also come to know humans across the world all over both the gender and sexuality spectrums through online Co-Op. That's where he had come to know a good deal of the abbreviations as well. If you feel comfortable with it, he'll ask if a few of his guildmates in another game would want to chat with you and give you support as a fellow LGBTQ+ individual with similar experiences. He also asks those same guildmates for advice on how to make you more comfortable and happy, and does his best to put their advice into actions.

(Where did those Ruri-chan pronoun pins come from....?)

Satan:

It was well known that Satan enjoyed spending time in Animal cafés, with Cat cafés being his all time favorite. So, it was no surprise to you when he invited you along with him to go to a new one that was about to open up. The café wasn't completely cat themed but it did have some felines hanging around. Rather, it was an animal café that intended to show off to customers the more exotic creatures that many of the residents in the Devildom kept as pets. You had happily agreed, eager to see some of the other fauna that the Devildom had to offer.

The walk to the café was quite pleasant, mixture of brief mingling and comfortable silence as you made your way through the uncrowded streets of the Devildom. With all of the connections that Satan had, he was able to be one of the people invited for the café's Pre-Opening day, where a small amount of guests could spend a bit longer than they usually would with the animals and have a few free treats.

When you had arrived you were quick to claim the secluded booth in the corner, a space that gave you a perfect view of the entire café as well as being in the optimal range for any of the animals to just wander up to you as they pleased. None of the other guests had arrived just yet, giving you some quality alone time with Satan and the animals. Oh, and the staff as well, you suppose.

Only a few of the animals had woken up at this point, and they were quick and eager to approach your table not too long after you had sat down. A few Human World animals were amongst them, such as a few housecats, dogs, and rabbits, but there were even more Devildom fauna over all. For the most part they looked quite similar to the mammals, reptiles, and avians that you were used to seeing, give or take some extra scales, arms, flippers, gills, and what not.

In the middle of stroking a vampiric rabbit, a staff member had finally come to your table with menus. Seeing as Satan was currently obsessing over the kitten that had approached the table moments before, you requested to have some extra time to look over the menu. Skimming over the menu, it was fairly similar to most of the other Devildom cafés with a few fancy pet themed names. It was a relief, since you didn't need to worry to much about accidentally eating something unsafe for humans.

Eventually the kitten wandered off, leaving you with Satan's attention for the time being. He was quick to skim the menu before picking out something that appealed to him, but you weren't having as much luck. Just about everything on the menu looked or sounded fairly appetizing, making it hard to choose between any of the drinks or food. You were almost ready to just let the vampire bunny on your lap choose what you would eat for you anyway. When you had suddenly uttered the sarcastic phrase, you were under the impression that you had just whispered it to the rabbit, but the way that Satan's eyebrow suddenly raised told you that he heard it as well.

"Ah, did I say that out loud?" "Yes. Is that an issue?" His lack of reaction was kind of odd, but you didn't pry. "No, I guess not." Satan was quick to recognize the discomfort in your voice. "This is what most Humans call 'coming out' isn't it? I suppose I should start arranging the festivities then." "E-eh?" A quizzical look was sent your way as you made the noise of surprise and distress. "What's the matter, Mc?" "Nothings really the matter it's just..." Picking up on what you were subtly hinting at, he offers you a gentle smile and places his fingertips on the knuckles of your hand that you had left on the table. "I don't know much about those sorts of things, but I know that they are important to you as a person, correct? And as someone who values your wellbeing and happiness, I fully support you."

On the topic of sexualities and gender in the Human World, the Devildom's history books about it aren't the most up to date. Most of the knowledge that Satan had on these sorts of things were learned second-hand, and before your arrival he never had too deep of an interest in anything to do with the Human World. He had been fully prepared to give you one of the "Coming Out" parties that an acquaintance of his had invited him to, but if you weren't ready to come out yet he fully understood. Satan is fully willing to study up on anything and everything he can learn about LGBTQ+ in general, and if you're willing to answer them, he'll ask you a great deal of questions.

(While Mammon might threaten those who judge you, Satan will act on those impulses.)

Asmodeus:

While Asmodeus was quite particular about his health and wellness, he knew that it couldn't hurt from time to time to indulge in something on the sugary side. Earlier that week you had spoken about wanting to go to Madam Scream's for some pastries since you'd been having the itch for them, and Asmo had jumped at the chance to take you out before his brothers could even speak.

Madam Scream's had bulked up their menu quite a bit from the last time you had been in the Devildom, with a few new treats added to the menu that were clearly based off of pastries from the Human World and Celestial Realm. They all looked delicious in their own right from what you had seen in commercials and online, so you knew off the bat that it was going to be a hard decision for you to choose just what you wanted. If Grimm wasn't a limiting factor for you, you might've just walked away with the whole store.

You had met Asmo at the gate after the last of your classes at RAD had finished, just as you had agreed to earlier in the day. Mammon had waited alongside you for a while, but quickly scurried off in a huff once he saw the Avatar of Lust approaching in the distance. Spotting you, Asmo was quick to make his way through the crowds of students, weaving in and out until he was finally close enough to wrap his arms around your waist and give you a gentle hug. With the close proximity, you could smell the new shampoo he had been talking about using that morning on the way to RAD, scented lightly with sugary smells. He chuckled as you joked about not needing to go to Madam Scream's if he just kept smelling his hair, but teased back that you wouldn't be able to handle doing that right now.

As one might expect, there was a decent amount of traffic at Madam Scream's. Just enough to make a somewhat large line, but not enough to have a line out of the building. This gave you some time to think over your options, since you could see the menu board from the door. Standing beside Asmo, you shifted nervously in place as you thought over all of the options on the menu. He took notice of your indecisiveness easily, and teased you lightly about it. Deciding to be a bit snarky in return, you spoke the phrase as a remark.

Asmo giggled pleasantly at your sudden confession, lightly placing a hand on your shoulder. "Mc, you say the funniest things sometimes! I didn't know you could make such relatable jokes!" "The first bit wasn't a joke Asmo..." You muttered, nervously rubbing your arm. "Oh, I know. And I appreciate that you were able to come out to me, even if it was on accident. I was just saying that I could relate to not wanting to ever make a decision." Looking up from the ground, you were met with a glimmering smile from the demon beside you. "Let's talk about this somewhere more private though, dear. I sense that you're not exactly comfortable discussing this in such a crowded place, no? But you are going to have to pick something off the menu before we leave."

Out of all the brothers, Asmodeus is most in tune with sexuality and gender as a whole. One could say he's quite literally seen it all and done it all as well, subtracting the final bit from those who are asexual. Asmo sets out to become your number 1 support system if you're comfortable with the idea, and is overall the most bold about helping you be more comfortable in your own skin. Want something to make you feel more masculine or feminine? Asmo's got you covered. Wanna feel more in-between/androgynous that day? Don't worry about a thing. Want to get yourself a few things to show off your proper pronouns? Asmo has a few that you can borrow while you pick out some ones that suit you. Need someone to introduce you to other similar people so you get comfortable with the concept of coming out before you are fully out of the closet? Asmodeus, at your service!

(Dunno why anyone would even try judging you with Asmo around, they'd only end up embarrassing themselves.)

Beelzebub & Belphegor:

Seeing as Belphie was the Avatar of Sloth, it could be hard to find the time to hang out with him unless he really wanted to. But ever since you had bonded closely with Beel, freed him from the Attic, and wormed your way into his heart, it was hard for him to deny any requests from you. So, he pleasantly agreed when you invited him to have a movie night with himself and his twin. Beelzebub was just as happy to tag along, content with the idea of spending time with good company and good food.

You had bought a majority of the basic movie snacks that one would typically dine on the night before, making sure to pick up as much as you would probably need and plenty of the things that yourself and the twins liked to eat. To make your movie night a little more special, you had asked Lucifer if he could get a projector set up to work in the Planetarium. When the star lights had been turned off, the ceiling made a perfect spot to project images onto so you could watch it while laying down. The Eldest was hesitant, but eventually gave in and agreed. Borrowing the laptop that you would stream Rouletteflix on from Leviathan was by far the easiest task, since you just promised him that you would marathon an anime with him next week in return.

Once the popcorn had been popped and all the blankets and pillows set out, you sent a text to the chat that you shared with the twins and waited. Beelzebub was the first to arrive, noticing the scent before your text when he had returned home from a quick workout. Belphegor arrived not too long after, not even bothering to knock as he made his way in and took a seat at your side.

The laptop you had borrowed was set up a little ways away from where you planned on laying down at, so much to Belphie's dismay you had to gently wriggle out of his grip and walk over there to select a movie for the three of you to watch together. A seemingly endless set of movies and shows were displayed on the screen before you, and as you scrolled down it looked like the list of titles would keep going to the end of time. By the time you were what the site considered halfway down the page, it had reloaded with more and set your progress almost all the way back up to the top. Asking the twins about what they wanted to watch wasn't much help to your plight either, since their responses pretty much boiled down to "whatever you and Beel/Belphie want to watch is fine". In annoyance you had spoken the phrase, before quickly shutting your mouth and looking over at the twins with wide eyes.

Beelzebub stared back at you with inquisitive eyes, tilting his head curiously at your words. Belphegor was more nonchalant, but he was clearly staring in your direction as well. "Is that true, Mc?" "I-er-" "It's fine if it is, Mc. We're not going to judge you if it is." "Beel, I-" "We've been through enough together that neither me or Beel would be cruel to you for practically anything anyway." Belphie cut you off, lifting his head up a bit so that the lower half of his face wasn't covered by his pillow and revealing a gentle smile. "It is, I am all of those things." You spoke again with a little more confidence. "Now why don't you two help me actually pick out a movie so we can get started?" "Tch, fine."

Again, with how limited the education on the Human World was in the Devildom prior to the Exchange Program, it was hard to find too many resources about the topics of sexuality and gender besides a few outdated sources. Belphie did know quite a bit about humanity prior to the Fall, but a lot had changed ever since then in human society, so the twins had quite a lot of catching up to do in that regard. Nonetheless, they're both very welcoming and accepting of you. The twins also try to go above and beyond to accommodate you unless it makes you uncomfortable. Most of the time they would go to Asmo for help on the topic, unless you're not out to him yet, and try to learn as much as they could about your specific gender and sexuality as a whole as well as ways to help you emotionally and physically. Collectively, they want nothing more than you to be happy, healthy, and living your best life.

[loving-ricciardo]

im devastated if danny gets so hurt that he has to leave f1 for good, bc i had the absolute shit times the previous couple of months mentally, and before this season started youtube recommended an interview w danny and it was smth titled “is the smile always real?” and i watched it and man it was the very thing i needed, which is kinda weird to say it bc he’s a literal stranger to me but i hope you’ll understand what im saying… but just smth about him that he showes about himself through media and stuff and that personality and style and what he does in the vlogs has continoued to uplift me during my down-phases. and to think about all this shit and how it must be affecting him, the person who’s positive mindset changed me, is surreal and i cant imagine how he’s feeling.

hi hun, first of all im sending you the biggest hug and i really hope your mental health is better now (disregarding the current Daniel situation) and i hope the universe is gentle with you 🧡🧡🧡

okay, i might go on a bit of a rant here-

i started watching this sport more closely because of Daniel. Like he is the reason I’m here today and ever since i started supporting him i tried to like define my ‘relationship’ with him ~I am probably not gonna make complete sense here~ but like I couldn’t imagine meeting Daniel on street and being like ‘omg I love you. you changed my life’ because he is literally a white rich man driving in circles like it’s a bit silly to care so much about him (this is me @ me btw like it’s an internal struggle I’m not ‘judging’ other fans! You do you besties!!). Like I’m a big football fan but I still could never really justify being such a big fan of them?? Like I obviously have favourites but i always compared them to my favourite authors and songwriters and honestly I have no idea why I always struggled with this like it’s not that deep.

Okay I lost myself and I’m too lazy to go back and rewrite it but I just wanted to say that I had different drivers which I liked for their driving style but it was too superficial for me to get into the sport for (again nothing wrong with that-) and it wasn't until I saw an interview with Daniel that I was just instantly charmed and impressed with how he presents himself. Like Daniel is the definition of ‘fake it till you make it’ and ‘act confident and no one will question you’. The sport is brutal and you can see he under all that charm he is just an anxious insecure lil gremlin who created an 'alter ego' to sort of protect himself from the outside world. Don't get me wrong like Daniel is his alter ego but it's just a bit of a different version of him and I do admire that. As someone with social anxiety I try to channel my Danny Ric energy when I can't control things hh.

And his energy is just so kind and warm and SO positive as you've mentioned. Like it must be SO draining to try to be so positive most of the time and like keeping his emotions in check,,, i admire that so much. Like he could be an asshole (i mean he is a charming asshole,, he does use that smile to get away with saying mean shit sometimes)- he literally doesn't own anyone anything but no he takes time to make people laugh and to give them a show and interact with fans and like even when he has bad days and he probably wants to lock himself in his driver's room he still tries his hardest to be his cheery self and even apologizes to people when he thinks he is not being positive enough- just all good all ways even though he keeps jumping from one toxic team to another--

and like normally i am pretty good with boundaries and i mean i am dramatic on this blog and i do get upset when his race goes badly but i can usually shake it off quickly but ngl these past two days,,, my heart is so heavy and im SOSOSOS pissed and SOSOSOS sad because the way mclaren is handling it- noone deserves let alone daniel who had been one bad race strategy after another yet still trying to be positive and professional... URGH i know this sport is brutal and unfair but this is truly disgusting

idk if this makes sense i am very bad at expressing my feels lol but yeah i hope danny has a good support system around him and im sending him and all daniel fans the biggest hug and good vibes, we will get through this <333

[ihavenocluedude]

Watched Honor Society (really good movie) and I couldn't help but feel bad for Michael by the end. He's just someone who stuck to his guns to see his plan through and, with the way he's treated at school, he doesn't have any friends he can turn to so that makes him a loner. Unlike Honor, he didn't get a chance to (or let himself) make genuine connections with people except with Honor, but we know how that turned out.

I love this ask and I do agree with the facts that; he definitely followed through with his plan, he was definitely not treated well at the school and it really seemed like he didn't have a shot at making any genuine connections with anyone until Honor started interacting with him with less than honourable (hehe) intentions.

RANT BELOW (this post got so much longer than I though it would I'm so sorry lol)

The whole feeling bad for Michael or not is a very complicated thing for me. Because like... usually it feels like his actions were a bit more foul than Honor's but like... she did think about actually drugging him at one point?? Also like "seducing" someone to manipulate them feels quite awful in my opinion?

But I think his actions feel more foul to me because he knew what she was trying to do, but she didn't see his plan (also the fact that I did not see that plot twist happening jfc).

Also she tried seducing him, but he actually succeeded with making her truly care for him. She tried throwing him off his game, he tried throwing off her world (a lil dramatic but I hope you get what I'm trying to say?)

In the end, it feels like she actually learnt something from the whole thing, got hurt by it all but ended up in a better place than where she started. Whilst Michael learnt that he truly could manipulate to win but he needed to be able to hinder anyone from outsmarting him in the end like Honor had with the audio of Mr Calvin.

What I mean is that Michael (just talking about movie Michael and really not the bby in my fic of his perspective lol) probably didn't learn anything from all of this, other than that he needed to improve his manipulation skills more??? (idk).

He'd probably just resent Honor for taking the recommendation away from him, it wouldn't be an actual lesson of "don't do shit like this" bc there was no more punishment than the recommendation not being his y'know? and I don't think he'd realise that if he'd just... idk not done any of it, he could've just seen Honor throw herself off by changing her world by changing others? idk I'm tired

I'm sorry if this all sounds like gibberish, my brain is really tired rn so I'm worried this won't make sense at all.

(I am working on another Honor Society fic that is going to be connected to Places We Won't Walk and I'm planning another one after that too?? I mean they're all connected but I want to post them like individually and not as chapters to the Places We Won't Walk but they are all connected and part of the same story. Though I think they all could sort of be read as stand-alones? I'm hoping? The working titles are; Coughing Fit and Bite The Hand That Feeds Me, both taken from songs sung by Lucy Dacus; Night Shift and Bite The Hand. I can't say they're inspired by them but.. I wouldn't say they aren't either? God this post is so much longer than I anticipated it would be I'm so sorry)

[astro-rain]

delicate; b. barnes

chapter thirteen - “sober desires & the reminiscence of a winsome smile”

delicate masterlist

word count: 4k

synopsis: wakanda gets a visit from our favorite captain, two drinks is too much rum for a reticent psychologist, and bucky knows (& feels) more than meets the eye.

pairings: bucky x fem!reader

[A/N]: this took so long to write but WHEW this chapter!!!! pls let me know what you think >:D

The knock on the outside of his hut was followed by a deep accented voice, one that he had heard before.

"Sergeant Barnes?" it called.

Quickly enough Bucky was outside, facing the king of Wakanda himself. He wasn't sure exactly what to say. You see, the majority of their past interactions included the Black Panther trying to kill him. T'Challa was kind and Bucky trusted him. It was just... a little awkward given the history.

"Your highness," he greeted.

He smiled bashfully at the title.

"I have some news for you."

Bucky's head cocked to the side, curious. News? Should he be worried? He hadn't been expecting anything.

"Captain Rogers is on his way here. He was alerted about our recent complication with N'Jadaka," he said, referring to who Bucky guessed was who Y/N called Erik Killmonger, "and he asked to come check in, make sure you're okay."

Steve was coming. His mood was immediately uplifted. He hadn't seen his oldest friend for months. It was weird to have Steve feeling the need to make sure Bucky was okay; it was usually the other way around. Nonetheless, he was excited. And he had the sudden urge to tell Y/N.

- - -

READER

"Sharon. Hey," she said into the phone.

The friends hadn't spoken since Y/N left for Wakanda - security measures since Sharon helped Steve and betrayed the... well everyone.

"Y/N!" Sharon greeted. "How is everything? Are you alright?"

"Yeah, no I'm totally okay. The Killmonger thing was more the royal family's deal than mine. I was just hiding out in some bunker with Barnes."

Concerned weaved its way into Sharon's voice. "Oh my god. Did anything happen?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, historically, stress hasn't affected him well..."

She wasn't sure why she almost got offended. "No... he was completely fine. He doesn't lose control out of nowhere and turn into the winter soldier. It's a lot more complicated than that... We were fine."

"Oh, that's good. Listen... I'm actually on my way to Wakanda right now."

"You're-... what?"

"Steve needed to check in on Bucky after Killmonger. Wilson and I are coming too."

They must all be together. It makes sense considering what happened after the disaster in Berlin, and then the airport fiasco in Germany and then... everything in Siberia.

Aw, they're in hiding together, Y/N joked in her head. She almost laughed out loud.

"Oh. Is that safe? For you? For everyone?"

"I've been careful. We've all been careful. But, things don't always go as planned. And T'Challa feels bad about putting you guys in a dangerous situation when he was supposed to protect you."

"It wasn't his fault."

"I know. We all know. But, it's kind of his way of making up for it: letting us stay so that Steve can check in on Barnes and we can cool off for a bit."

"Was Rogers mad?"

"Well, he wasn't thrilled that his best friend was trapped alone in a country that just got taken over..."

He wasn't alone.

"...he was mostly worried," Sharon continued. "Still is."

"Right."

"Alright, well I got to go. We'll be there in a couple hours."

"I'll see you. Be safe."

"See you."

- - -

BUCKY BARNES

"Hey Buck," the happiness in Steve's voice was genuine as he patted his oldest friend on the back in the middle of an embrace. "How you been?"

"A hell of a lot better than the last time I saw you, that's for damn sure," Bucky smiled.

Sam Wilson stood next to the star spangled man with a plan. Bucky briefly glanced at him.

"Wilson," he deadpanned.

"Barnes," he returned the greeting.

"I was worried when T'Challa told me about Killmonger," Steve said. "Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful that they let you stay here, but I just didn't think I'd have to be worried so soon."

"It's alright. Everything turned out okay and I was fine the whole time. You don't have to lose your head."

"I'm not losing my head."

"You never had it in the first place."

The blonde changed the topic of conversation.

"You were with that therapist right?"

"Yeah."

"What do we think about her?" he asked with equal parts caution and suspicion. "Do you trust her?"

Bucky wasn't sure why he was almost offended.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"Well, you know what happened the last time you were with a psychiatrist..."

"Yeah well, this one doesn't have a personal vendetta against the Avengers."

"You sure she's alright?"

He looked serious, and Bucky could see the genuine concern etched into his friend's face. Steve was truly wary.

"I'm positive. She's helped so much since I've been here. I really trust her."

"Okay, if you say so. I trust you."

Bucky smirked. "Hey uh... is Sharon with you?"

Sam said nothing but radiated a smirk to match Bucky's perfectly, a kind of smirk that only a ball-busting best friend cracks.

"She is..." Steve replied. "Why do you ask?"

"Oh nothing. Just wondering, that's all."

"She said she wanted to talk to a friend."

"Oh, she's probably with Y/N."

"Who?"

"Y/N. Dr. Y/L/N. 'The therapist.'"

"I didn't know they were friends."

"Why do you think Sharon recommended her?"

"She said she knew 'the best' person to help."

"That true. She's crazy smart."

"As long as she can do the job, I'm all for it, no matter whose friend she is."

In a short-lived thought, Bucky wondered what Steve Rogers would think of who else Y/N was friends with. He wondered if Steve would think it was strange to be friends with your doctor, or if he'd be pleased that Bucky had gotten close to someone, anyone else in this world.

"How long are you guys staying for?" Bucky asked.

Steve rubbed the back of his neck anxiously. "Honestly, we were only planning on staying for like a week or so. We've been moving throughout Europe, and the other day, when we were in Prague... it was almost really bad."

"We need to stay low for a while," Sam added.

"What did you do?" Bucky asked, used to Steve getting himself into trouble.

"It's a long story..."

"What did T'Challa say about it?"

"He said to take as much time as we needed," Steve filled him in.

"You know, I'm startin' to really like this guy," Sam nodded, smiling. "Obviously when he went all cat murderer on you, he was a bit of a pain in the ass. But now? Guardian angel."

Bucky shook his head at Sam's nonsense. What an idiot, he thought. He wondered what Y/N would think of Sam, but then a more pressing question popped into his head.

"Where are you guys gonna stay?"

"I'm guessing there," Steve said pointing behind Bucky.

When he turned around, Bucky was shocked but he also wasn't. Behind and around his hut stood three more just like it, but slightly smaller. He could've sworn those weren't there yesterday, but that's the beauty of Wakanda. They were ten steps ahead of the rest of the world and he guessed that included speed building as well.

"I will never stop loving this place," he admired.

-

He tried not to sound too eager when he knocked on her door. She looked shocked but didn't really try to hide it.

"Oh," she sounded confused. "Hi, Bucky..."

"Hey," he grinned. "I have a proposition for you."

Her eyebrows lowered as her lips twisted into the most devilish smirk. She could communicate an entire joke with just her face.

"Not like that!" he exclaimed.

She laughed, smirk morphing into an endearing smile. "Like what then?"

"Steve wanted to have like a bonfire sorta thing to catch up since we're all together for once. You know, just like drinks and stupid stories from the forties. D'ya think you could part with your paper work to grace us with your presence?"

"Oh, uh... are you sure?"

"Of course. I'd love to have you there."

She wrung out her hands. "I don't know, Buck. Is that really appropriate? To have your doctor hangin' out with your friends?"

"That may be, but that's not what I'm asking. I want my friend to 'hang out' with my other friends."

Out of her composure seeped a meek smile. The air felt softer to him.

"And maybe you can analyze Wilson and tell me what his biggest fear is later," he added.

She snickered.

"Okay. Lead the way, James Buchanan."

-

The fire was a monster, roaring and crackling with all the life in the world. Bucky loved it. He loved the warmth, the heat, the lack of cold.

"I'm gonna get another drink," Y/N said. "You want anything, Buck?"

"I'm all set," he smiled, gaze lingering for only a second too long.

"Sharon?" she turned. "You?"

The blonde shook her head. "Oh, I think I've had plenty."

Surrounding the fire sat five chairs. All but one was empty as Y/N went to get her second drink. Of course they were in Sam's hut, Bucky thought. After all, even though it was Steve's idea, Sam was most excited about the whole thing, actually sitting down and just relaxing instead of fleeing from belligerent governments.

"Therapist's pretty," Sam noted with a smirk once she was out of hearing range.

"Y/N," Bucky corrected, mind going completely elsewhere. "She's so smart."

"Smart enough to call you Buck..." Steve said, catching on to Sam.

"What?"

"She calls you Buck."

"Yeah, so? You do too."

"Yeah, but I've known you longer. And I'm your friend."

"She's my friend too," he shrugged.

"She's your doctor..."

"And I'm a hundred year old man with one arm trying to get un-brainwashed in a country that the rest of the world doesn't even know exists. None of this is conventional."

"...fair," Steve said, with only a little bit of skepticism. "Are you guys close?"

Does spending hours alone talking with someone in a hidden bunker make you close? Does them comforting you after a nightmare and then subsequently allowing you to get the best night sleep you've had in forever? What about making daring voyages to quaint waterfalls and laughing a kind of laugh that makes your heart swell? What about-

"Buck?"

He shrugged. Again. "I guess so."

Sam narrowed his eyebrows. "How close?"

"Wilson," Sharon admonished exasperatedly. "Y/L/N's his doctor, come on. That's inappropriate to suggest."

Sam put his hands up in mock surrender. Briefly, just briefly, Bucky imagined kicking the leg of Sam's chair and watching him fall back. He didn't, obviously. But it would have been funny if he did.

The seemingly never ending conversation was cut short when Y/N returned, drink in hand, and took her seat next to Bucky.

"What'd you get?" he asked, demeanor subtly but swiftly changing into something lighter, something happier.

"I don't know, but it has rum in it," she shrugged sardonically before clinking her glass with Bucky's.

"Cheers," Sam raised his glass, trying to engage.

Y/N wordlessly, and with a half-smile, raised her glass in his direction.

"So," Steve started, comfortably crossing his legs and leaning back into his chair before asking Bucky, "you wanna know what actually happened in Prague?"

"Do enlighten me. I've been waiting all night."

"Jerk."

"Punk."

The rest of the night went on sort of like this. The group took turns telling stories and then listening. Cracking jokes and then laughing. Everyone but Y/N, Bucky noticed. She just... sat and drank, livelihood only extending to the borders of her seat.

He hadn't seen her like this before, and he found himself stuck halfway between confused and worried. Had something happened? Had something wrong been said?

He kept an eye on her as dusk melted into night. He told himself it was because he was concerned, but that was only in addition to the way he was magnetized to how she looked with the light of the fire gleaming on her skin.

After she would finish a drink, she'd stare into the fire for a little while, before leaving to get another. When he made sure no one was looking at him, he'd look at her. Discretely. At her eyes. The reflection of the fire in her pupils made him wonder if she would burn the fire before it could ever burn her. He was all too aware of the heat that accompanied her gaze. It was a ravishing burn that made him ache for the searing feeling as soon as it was taken away.

He didn't dare think of it for too long or else he would get distracted. And someone would call his name, pulling him out of a trance he didn't want to be caught in. A trance he wasn't sure he wanted to admit that he was in.

The night remained as such until someone - he couldn't remember who - said they were tired, and everyone bid their farewells, and wished their good nights.

Y/N spared about a side hug to Sharon before walking off on her own. Bucky half volunteered, half insisted on tending to the fire to make sure it went out, only to ignore it as soon as everyone was gone and follow after his psychologist.

He caught up to her as she was in the middle of opening the door to her living quarters.

"Y/N."

She turned around in the spot, door wide open, staring up at him.

He bore into her eyes, looking at something, noticing her dilated pupils and hazy stare.

"You're drunk," he said, but it sounded more like a question.

"Yeah."

"But you don't seem drunk?"

"I'm not wasted," she padded into the room, carelessly leaving the door wide open for him to walk through. "Just drunk enough to remember why I didn't drink in college."

She rubbed her eyes.

"Think I want another one," she sighed, heading for the door with a bitter smile. "More rum."

Bucky gently closed the door, maneuvering himself in front of it, and blocking her from exiting. Another drink is definitely not a good idea.

He changed the subject. "Why didn't you drink in college?"

Her eyebrows raised, introducing a look that said Really? You think I don't know what you're doing?

"Wow, look at you being the voice of reason for my otherwise inebriated brain."

Nevertheless, she cooperated.

She sighed. "It just... makes me miserable. I'm a sad drunk."

"Better than a mean drunk," he offered.

"Possibly. It's a real mood killer, though."

"That why you were off all night?"

"Off... ? I don't know, I guess so... I'm usually pretty inconspicuous when I'm drunk. Didn't think anyone would really notice."

There was no hesitation when he spoke.

"I did."

"I'm sorry..."

"Don't be sorry. Just... why did you keep drinking if it only makes you miserable?"

"Alcohol is a depressant," she breathed mechanically, as if speaking was difficult. "It depresses your nervous system, then you get disinhibited. Then you don't care about rationality and just drink! Then in the moment it feels kinda good... but then it makes you sad... and then you need more to blur the feeling away. It's like... the worse you feel, the more you need to drink... but then the more you drink... the worse you feel..."

"How are you drunk but still talking... sorta still like you usually do?"

She smirked, looking like she was trying not to laugh. He was glad she was smiling.

"Maybe you're not the only one with heightened metabolism as a result of the serum..."

He looked at her quizzically, amused. She wasn't making total sense, but he couldn't find it in himself to give much of a damn. She smiled, again.

"Kidding. I just have outstanding self-control."

She plopped down on the floor, deciding that she no longer wanted to use her legs. Fine motor function was overrated for intoxicated people.

He sat down with her, next to her.

"If I tell you a joke will you be less sad-drunk?"

"I already am 'less sad-drunk.' I wasn't before, but," she took a breath in, "now you're here, so... improvements have been made."

"That's good 'cause I was worried before."

She glanced up at him with brazen eye contact. Her face held a mixture of what looked like a confused and pained expression, as something changed. Some sort of realization or reality check.

She wiped her hands over her face. "God, this is so ridiculous. I'm sorry. You shouldn't be worried about me, that's not your job. I'm sorry. I should just go to bed, and you can leave..."

"I know it's not my job. I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

"I was alright- it... it's not like I was crying at the fire or something. I was fine."

"After your second drink, you were silent almost the entire time."

"You were counting my drinks?"

Not exactly.

"I was paying attention."

"To what?"

To you.

"You completely turned into yourself. Your elbows and legs were drawn in close to your body: unrelaxed and almost apprehensive posture. You were nonverbal, didn't make any jokes, no sarcastic commentary. I was literally purposefully saying things I knew you would correct or tease or laugh at and nothing. I was waiting for a 'smartass' or a 'there's a reason behind everything' explanation or anything science related. But there was nothing."

Her face was blank. It took her a second to catch up. Blinking slowly, she shook her head, eyebrows furrowed, all emphasis on the word. "Why?"

Her tone was truly confused. It was like she, in her heart of hearts, for the life of her, could not believe he was concerned.

"Y/N you're my friend," he chided. "Why wouldn't I be?"

She averted her gaze. Her voice was barely above a whisper. "I don't know."

"Look," his voice was soft. "I know you know everything and you know my mannerisms and micro-expressions and you know when I'm lying and whatever else 'cause you're a genius psychologist. But is it really that hard to believe that, after all the time we've known each other, I know you a little too? That I saw you for once instead of you always seein' me?"

"I think you're the only person who sees me."

The words leaked out before he thought to analyze them, tone lower than a whisper.

"Well I can't seem to look at much else."

He had never felt such potent silence. Did he just fuck up majorly? They just sat, on the floor, eyes glued to each other like twenty year old dried cement. He didn't think he could move away if he tried.

"I see you now," she whispered.

"What do you mean?"

"Blue," she breathed. "Your eyes are so blue. I don't... think I've ever seen that shade of blue."

It happened exponentially slowly, but the closer her face got to his, the more his chest felt like it was going to burst in the best way possible. As if liquid light poured into his lungs, inflating his chest and igniting every nerve with adoration.

Her lips hovered over his so lightly it was as if it wasn't even happening, like her affection was a ghost. But it was happening, and he could feel it. He could feel the softness in her lips and the smell of the rum she drank as they combined into the wondrous dual sensation that permeated throughout his brain.

They weren't kissing by any stretch. Their lips were hardly touching. However, in that moment, he was at her mercy. He was prepared to bend the laws of nature to her will if she would allow the continuation of this feeling for even a fraction of a second more.

Until it stopped and she waned away like the moon bidding adieu to the morning sky.

Her voice shook. "I'm so sorry."

"Don't... it's-"

"No. It's not okay. It's not okay."

He leaned back, examining her face. She looked confused and embarrassed and scared.

"Y/N, it's fine. It's okay, seriously, don't worry about it."

"I'm sorry, I'm... I'm drunk and I'm disinhibited and it's affecting my judgement and making me impulsive. I'm sorry."

He couldn't be exactly sure, but it sounded as if she was trying to convince herself more than she was trying to convince him.

Neither of them moved a muscle.

"Do you want me to leave?" he asked.

She was silent, frozen. It reminded him of a past conversation about the fight or flight response.

Bucky stood up and offered his hand to the woman sitting on the floor in front of him. "Here."

She took it gingerly and stood up with him before wide eyes stared into his apologetically.

"Please don't feel bad," he pleaded. "Barely anything happened."

"Still..."

"Why don't you just get some sleep and we can talk tomorrow. I promise it won't seem like such a big deal when you're sober."

She nodded but they both remained motionless, hands still together. He knew they needed to let go, but her hand didn't move, and she just kept looking into him.

"Okay," she whispered.

She walked him to the door, hand still in hand, and until he was forced to let go of her to open it. He stepped, ever so slowly, out of her room and onto the grass outside. He looked up at her, the doorway between them suddenly feeling like worlds of distance. They stood on opposite sides of the open door like statues. Bucky didn't know what to do and he wasn't sure what to say.

He settled on a, "Goodnight."

He tried not to make it sound so weak and timorous but he failed entirely. He didn't want to leave her like this. Guilty and alone. God knows he knew what it felt like.

Her voice was dry and quiet. "Goodnight."

He wasn't sure when the door shut or which one of them had shut it. The only thing he was sure of was the feeling of formidable regret pooling in his stomach.

On one hand, there was regret for letting her lean in and get so close because now he was scared that their dynamic was ruined and worried that Y/N felt awful. On the other hand, there was regret that he just let her pull away. Regret that he didn't lean in more and shamelessly drown in her. Regret that he didn't unapologetically suffocate himself with the softness of lips, the inebriating smell of rum on on her tongue, and the utterly bewitching taste of her he was sure would follow.

He wasn't sure what he felt, to be honest. He was a muddle of emotions of which he had no idea how to sift through. Momentarily, he wished he was drunk so he wouldn't have to think so hard. Then, he remembered the saying, "drunk words are sober thoughts," and he was damn glad he was stone cold sober; he could only imagine the things he would say to her if he was drunk.

This lead him to pondering, it got the gears in his brain turning. It made him wonder. Maybe... just maybe... if drunk words were sober thoughts, then what if drunk actions were sober desires?

Thinking like this could cause him read the situation completely differently. Thinking like this could make him read the situation in such a way that conceived the slightest sliver of hope for emotions gone repressed. Hope is dangerous...

Hope is dangerous, so Bucky shoved it down into the deepest cavern of his brain, the very same cavern where his feelings for her resided. It was a monster in a cave, growling and hissing menacingly. Intensely.

It scared him, this intensity. It scared him so much that the only way he could fall asleep was by thinking about the way James Buchanan sounded when she said it with a winsome smile.

delicate taglist: ​@bakugouswh0r3 @thefridgeismybestie @strivingforelegance @ilovespideyyy @xpurpleglitter @bluelakeee @darkacademic2 @nickkie1129 @eclipsedplanet @paradisedixon @crazy-beautiful @coffee--writes @lilithknight1111 @buckybarnesishot310 @softladyhours @alwayssandy @quxxnxfhxll @those-sea-green-eyes @hero-ically @devilswaldorf

[blueeyedgeorgie]

Wide Awake-Dream Was Taken

A/N: Here’s Pt. 2 bitches. I hope you all enjoy ! Also, please go support and follow @notphilosopherstudentblog​ because she helped me out with this because she’s so intelligent. <3

Btw Title is based off Katy Perry’s song Wide Awake

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 3.5k+

_________

It was early. Too early for Y/n to be crying. But her she was, sitting in bed, clinging to one of Clay's old shirts. In the past, it was normal for her to steal a couple of his belongings. It was typical of Y/n to invite herself into his closet, taking whatever she wanted to wear, whenever she wanted. But now it just felt wrong.

There were only a few items left Y/n had that were his. She never washed this shirt, she had only worn it once. She could still remember the day she stole it.

"Y/n, you've got to be kidding," Clay turned in his desk chair. She had just walked out of his closet wearing an oversized grey t-shirt. "You're seriously going to leave me with five pieces of clothing."

She shot him a playful look, taking a moment to admire herself in the nearest mirror. "I'm sorry Mr. 15 million subscribers. You can always buy more clothes with all that money."

"Fine... it looks better on you anyway."

She had spent the rest of the day in his shirt. And by the end of the day, the scent of his laundry detergent was strong. For an odd reason, the t-shirt had spent weeks in the back of Y/n's closet, untouched. At least, until this morning.

All night she was toss and turning. It seemed impossible for her to get a moment of sleep, her mind had been racing. The only reason she wasn't able to sleep was because of one person; Clay. Their fight had played over and over again in her mind.

'But Y/n, I really do love you.'

There were so many different ways the night could've ended. But it was her fault it ended how it did. If only she hadn't asked for him to step out of the stupid restaurant with her. She didn't need to make a scene, but she still did. This was all her fault.

The sound of her phone buzzing had pulled Y/n away from the piece of fabric in her hands. Looking down at her nightstand, she glanced at the electronic. Wilbur was calling. With a sigh, hesitantly she reached for the phone.

"Hey, Y/n."

"Morning, Wilbur."

The brunette bit his lip at the sound of her voice. He could tell she had a rough night. "Are you doing alright?"

"I'm..." she paused, looking down at the shirt in her lap. "Yeah, I'm doing better."

"That's good to hear," For some odd reason, he was pacing. It wasn't normal for him to pace back and forth. He was already dressed for the day, wearing a set of brown pants with a creme button-up shirt. A pair of glasses rested on his face as he spoke. "George and I were hoping to go get some breakfast. Do you think you could show us somewhere good?"

"Yeah, I'm up for breakfast. What about Nick and Clay?" If Clay was coming, she didn't know what she'd do. There would be tension, but maybe she could find a way to patch everything up between them.

"Nick's going over to Clay's. They wanna have a bit of time together."

"Oh, okay... when do you guys wanna meet up?"

"Maybe 30 minutes to an hour?"

"An hour it is."

Before preparing to go out, Y/n had texted Wilbur a location point to meet up. It was a nice restaurant located in town, it had always been one of her favorite places to eat. George and Wilbur had gotten a table outside, it was nice out for a day in Flordia.

"Do you think she's gonna do it?"

Wilbur glanced across the table to George, "Honestly, probably not." He let out a sigh, " hope she agrees. I really do. But it's gonna be hard for her to let go. I just think it'd be better if they got some time away from each other."

"You're right. As good of friends they are, they need a break from each other." They both knew it wasn't a good idea for Y/n to stay in Flordia at the moment, she needed a moment away from Clay. So Wilbur had come up with an idea to get Y/n to take a break.

"What do you think of Elise?" Changing the subject, George leaned back in his chair. It was rare for Clay's girlfriend to come up in conversation. She seemed like such a touchy subject in the group. She was definitely a sweetheart, but it seemed like she appeared out of nowhere. The group had been planning future Dream SMP roleplay on a Discord call. It had been so brief when Clay mentioned her. 'Hey guys, I just wanted to mention I started dating somebody.' It was smart of George to hold his tongue because of what else Clay had to say. 'Her name is Elise and she's 19.'

Most of the group had expected Clay and Y/n to end up together. They were best friends who lived in the same town. There was constant flirting going on between them. And not to mention Y/n had always been there to support Clay through the bad and good.

"Hey, guys!"

Both of the British men were pulled out of their thoughts by the sound of her voice. Y/n was quick to take a seat by Wilbur. "Have we ordered yet?"

"No actually, we've been waiting for you." George fixed his posture, his classic grin appeared on his face. "Got any recommendations for drinks?"

"My go-to has to be a mimosa and the eggs benedict."

The knock came as a surprise, but there were a lot of surprises happening this morning. Clay had woken up earlier than usual. Naturally, he'd get up around 9 or 10, but today he woke at 7. He couldn't go to bed for a few more hours, his mind wouldn't quit racing with thoughts. He had ended up skipping breakfast, he wasn't hungry today. It was normal for him to eat something, he always woke up starved. The early knock was the cherry on top of the cake of the surprises happening today.

"Hey Nick, what are you doing here?" Clay glanced behind his friend, looking for any sign of the rest of his friends. Originally, they had planned to meet up later that afternoon at his place. "I thought you were coming by at noon?"

Nick stood on the porch, burying his hands into the pockets of his jeans. It was early in the morning, yet it was already warm outside. "Yeah, sorry I didn't ask if I could come by earlier. I just wanted some time alone with you."

"Cool, make yourself at home," Stepping aside, the blonde opened the door a bit wider for his friend. "Sorry it's a bit messy, I was planning to clean up before you guys showed up."

The pair had made their way to Clay's living room. It was nice, but still a bit messy just as he said. As the blonde began to pick up after himself, the pair had a bit of small banter.

"Is Elise gonna come by this afternoon?" Nick watched as Clay picked up a couple of items sitting on the coffee table.

"Uh, no. I think she had work today."

"Oh, what about Y/n?"

Clay tensed, pausing for a second. She had been on his mind a lot since the last time he saw her. The way she looked at him... it hurt. It felt like his heart was being ripped out of his chest. This morning she was all he could think of. He missed her good morning texts, the way she'd update him about little situations happening in her schedule, when she would randomly face time him just to say: 'I wanted to see your stupid face because I missed it.'

"I... she's not coming."

"Why's that?"

"You know why, Nick." Clay let out a sigh, taking a seat on the couch. He didn't know what he could do, he was the one who messed everything up. If he tried to apologize, he might even piss Y/n off even more. She had always been a hardass about being hurt or betrayed, it was hard for her to give people a second chance. "I don't even think she knows we're all planning to meet up later today."

"Dude... it's weird seeing you two like this. It feels wrong." The two friends looked at one another, it seemed like Nick could tell exactly what Clay was thinking. 'It is wrong.'

"I miss her. But I was also the one who fucked everything up by ignoring her for weeks."

"Why'd you even do that?"

"Because I fell in love with her. I was scared she didn't feel the same. So I distanced myself and looked for someone to start a relationship with.  That's why I met Elise."

"Clay... you're an idiot."

"I know."

Turning, Wilbur looked at Y/n. She was halfway finished with her meal. Everything was going great, she seemed so happy just to be able to talk with two friends. It seemed like the best time to spring the idea on her.

"Hey, Y/n?"

"Yes, Wilbur?"

He bit his lip, glancing at the man sitting on the other side of the table. George gave a brief nod, knowing what was going to happen next. "George and I had an idea we'd like to share with you."

"What is it?"

"You know how you've been talking about how you've always wanted to visit us in London?"

"Yeah..."

Wilbur paused, looking back at George for a second. "Well, we were thinking... I have a free room in my place. Why don't you spend one of two months with me just to see how you like London?"

Y/n's face lit up. "That sounds great, Wilbur. I... wow. That sounds so fun!" She paused, her smile disappeared. "But what about my house? I can't just abandon it for a month."

Wilbur bit his lip, 'Shit.'

"Clay can stop by once a week, just to make sure everything's fine. I'm positive he'll do it for you," George was quick to jump into the conversation. As soon as he mentioned Clay, Wilbur shot him a look. Y/n tensed at the sound of his name.

"Listen Y/n, you don't have to do it. Just keep the idea in mind, you can give me an answer before George and I leave."

"Okay..." Y/n bit her lip, looking at her food. She knew the only right answer was yes, but it was going to be hard to talk to Clay about this. "I think... I think I wanna do this. I wanna go with you guys."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, but... just give me some time to think it over."

"We're always here for you, Y/n. No pressure." Wilbur placed a hand on Y/n's. He wanted her to come to London, everything would be better. He cared a lot about Y/n, he really did. He just wanted to see her happy.

"I just want her to be happy," Clay let out a sigh, opening the refrigerator door. His eyes skimmed over what there was, he had gone grocery shopping the other day to plan for today. He still wasn't hungry.

"Everything's gonna get-" Nick paused, he was interrupted by the sound of Clay's phone ringing. There was a moment of silence as the blonde closed the refrigerator, approaching his phone on the kitchen counter.

"It's Y/n."

"What?"

"Do I pick it up?" Clay glanced at his friend.

"yes, yes, yes! Do it!"

Clay was quick to pick up the phone, putting it to his ear. "Hello?"

"Hey, Clay."

"Hey, Y/n."

"Do you..." she paused, "Do you have a moment to talk?"

"Yeah, I can talk." Clay leaned against the counter, listening to her intently. It had only been a few days, but he missed her voice. He could tell she was down.

"I know this seems like the wrong time to be asking for favors and everything, considering everything that has happened this last week. But... I need your help with something." She paused again. He could tell she was hesitating, as though something was keeping her back. "I think I'm gonna be gone for a while. And I just need someone to check up with my house every couple of days. Could you do that? It's fine if you don't want to, it was a stupid idea of me to ask you anyways-"

"No, yeah. Of course, I'll check up on your house for you, Y/n." He was quick to cut her off. The last thing he wanted was for her to think she couldn't turn to him for help anymore. "And it's not stupid of you to ask me. I'll always be here if you need something or need help."

She scoffed, "You weren't there for me these past few weeks." She stopped herself again for the third time. "I'm sorry, that was really bitchy of me."

"I deserved it," he could only chuckle. Y/n was still herself. "But yeah, is there anything else you need... or want to talk about?"

"I... no. No, that's it. I guess I'll talk to you... eventually."

"Alright," Clay fought back the urge to let out a disappointed sigh. "I'll see you." Without saying goodbye, she hung up the phone. He didn't know what to expect next, he wasn't even sure whether this was a step in the right direction or not.

Staring at the box, Y/n felt herself tear up for the hundredth time this week. This was going to be a hard task to complete, but it was going to help her let go.

Walking around the house, Y/n picked up item by item. Anything that belonged to Clay was going in the box.  A few t-shirts, a couple of CDs she stole, one of his coffee cups. Y/n wasn't even sure how the cup had gotten to her house, but she knew it belonged to Clay. All of her coffee cups matched, all the same color and shape. But... this one cup had shown up in her pantry one day. Every time Clay had spent the night, he'd start the morning off with a cup of coffee, only using that cup.

At this point, Y/n was picking up items that held too strong memories of him. The box had quickly filled, it felt strange. It seemed like she had just lost a chunk of her house. Of her life. This needed to happen. This was the only way they'd be able to keep their friendship.

Y/n had agreed to come to London with Wilbur, she was finally fully on board. Two suitcases sat by her front door as she waited for Wilbur and George to arrive. She would only be in Florida for a few more hours, she needed to give this box back to him. Maybe she could just say screw it, leave it here under her bed, hidden away. So when she'd return she'd be comforted by his shirts and hoodies, she'd listen to his songs and cry.

No. She couldn't do that. If she did that she wouldn't be letting go of everything. Y/n needed closure, it'd be the best for them both and she knew it. Pulling her out of her thoughts, Y/n heard a knock on her door. It was time.

"Morning, Y/n."

"Morning, Wilbur." Y/n smiled, embracing her friend in a hug as soon as she opened the door.

"George is in the car. We got coffee too." Wilbur looked down at her, his arms still wrapped around her waist, holding her close. "You're positive you want to do this?"

"Yes, I need to."

"Alright, then. I'll support you with whatever decision you make." He finally stepped aside, moving to grab her suitcases. Y/n grabbed the box, she had moved it into the hallway before greeting Wilbur. With one more glance, she looked down her hallway before closing the door. As soon as her home was locked up, Y/n had dropped her keys into the box. This was going to be the final step before London. Giving it all back.

George and Y/n greeted each other, Y/n giving him a quick hug before entering the car. The rest of the time, the car ride was quiet. There was obviously going to be tension. On their way, Y/n kept thinking to herself about what she was going to say. What if she fucked it all up? What if they broke out into another fight?

"Here we are."

Y/n sucked in a breath, looking over at the familiar house. This was the final step.

"Y/n, do you need either of us to walk up with you?" Wilbur spoke, he noticed the way she looked at the house.

She shook her head. "No, I got this..." Stepping out of the car, there were only a few words she'd repeat to herself. 'This is the final step. This is the final step. This is the final step.' It felt like it took forever for her to reach his porch.

As soon as she was face to face with the wooden door, she was quick to hit the doorbell. She just wanted to get this over with, fast. A few moments passed, and just as she reached to hit the doorbell again, she stepped back. The door was opening.

"Y/n?" Clay yawned, his hair was a mess. It was obvious she had just woken him up. "What are you-"

"It's time for me to go now. I'm sorry for waking you up. Here are my keys and a few of your items in case you wanted them while I was-"

"Woah, woah, woah." He interrupted her, rubbing his eyes. "Slow down, you're talking fast. You're leaving? Right now?"

"I..." she sighed. "Yeah, I am."

"And this..." he looked down at the box in her hands. "They're all mine?"

"Yeah, that's kinda the whole point." She gave him a look, "Considering the box says your name."

"Alright... thank you," he nodded, carefully picking the box up from her. "How long are you gonna be gone?"

"I'm not sure. I just know I have to go."

"Why?"

"Because of us, Clay. It'd be better for both of us. We need time apart. We have so much going on in each other's lives. I just need a break."

He watched her, she looked close to tears. Without thinking, Clay pulled his friend into his embrace, holding her close. "I understand. Take as much time as you need. I'll be here."

"Thank you."

The hug was short, Y/n was the first to pull away. As soon as it was over, she muttered a quick goodbye, hurrying back to the car. When the car door shut, Wilbur was quick to jump to asking questions.

"Are you okay? Do you need anything? You're completely sure you want to do this?"

"I'm fine, Wilbur."

"Alright, I just wanted to check." Wilbur paused, looking out the window. "Y/n, would you mind if George and I said our goodbyes to Clay?"

"Go ahead, I'm not the boss of you."

Sitting in the car alone, Y/n got a moment to catch her breath and stop the tears from forming. She did it. She completed the final step. She could do whatever she wanted now. The moment alone in the car felt short, George and Wilbur were back in the car in what felt like seconds. Only, Wilbur sat in the back with Y/n, George driving by himself.

"You ready, Y/n?"

"More than anything." Y/n looked at Wilbur, the way he smiled at her just felt... good. Looking down, she noticed Wilbur gently grabbing her hand in his. She smiled, things were going to start getting good for her, she knew it.

"Wow okay, now I just feel like a driver for you two." George shot a dirty look in the mirror.

"A bad driver," Y/n grinned at her friend. "Start moving, Mr. colorblind." "If I get a ticket for running a red light, I'm blaming you."

With a yawn, Y/n opened her eyes. She had another good night of sleep, it had been weeks since she had a bad night of sleep. For eight months, she had lived in London. At this point, her house in Flordia was sold to a family of three, and she was no longer flatmates with Wilbur. Instead, she was his girlfriend.

Turning over, she faced the beautiful brunette. He was still asleep. She owed him everything. She was now an influencer because of him, he had helped her set up her YouTube channel and introduced her to the fans. He thought it'd be a good job for her, considering how she was a social butterfly and carry conversations.

Clay and Y/n didn't interact as much as they use to. They'd interact on the Dream SMP and over social media. But it was rare for them to speak in private. The only way their relationship got better was by them distancing themselves. What was a beautiful friendship had turned into an acquaintanceship. Clay was still dating Elise, but it seemed like things weren't going the best and there were signs of him planning to break up with her soon.

Wilbur peeked an eye open, looking at his girlfriend. "Morning, Y/n."

"Morning, Wilbur."

Y/n smiled, she knew she was right. Everything got better for her. After all, When the rain ends, there will always be a rainbow.

[fictionwordcounts]

Home [Anakin x Reader]

Word Count: 2000+

Summary: You're on the desolate planet of Dagobah, and things are a far less than exciting. However, someone crashing close to your home changes everything.

Requested on Wattpad.com at StarkWars084

You were whittling away at a stubborn piece of wood when you saw a ship of some sort fall from the sky not far away. You jumped up from the small chair you had made and examined the smoke trail in awe. Nothing exciting ever happened on this disgusting swamp planet and you absolutely had to go to the crash sight.

Smiling to yourself, you climbed down your tree house and headed off in the direction of the crashed, mysterious object. Wading through the thick mud was easy and you started walking a ways off, but stopped suddenly. You reached toward your back only to grasp empty air-- you'd left your weapon at home. You were furious with yourself for forgetting such an important tool. The planet you were on was nowhere shy of dangerous creatures. Looking over at a large stick on the ground, you decided it would have to do. You grasped it tightly and continued on until you found a broken ship submerged in quick sand. If anyone was alive in there, they certainly weren't now. It was a shame too. You were hoping to find someone (You didn't care who) to make life more interesting. You would have settled for anything in fact.

The sand prevented you from investigating closer, but it was just as amazing from where you were. Sure you had seen ships before, but that was a long time ago, before you came here. The ship was swallowed up quickly by the hungry sand and you strained to see the last bit of the tail disappear. You were about to leave when you noticed footprints leading off from where the plain had been. A sound from behind you made you jump, and you spun around with your makeshift weapon in hand. A man with shoulder-length dark hair and clothes caked in sand stood there. His eyes were kind and calm despite the large stick only inches from his face.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you," he stated. Even if it wasn't his intention, he had scared you a great deal, and you found yourself unable to lower the stick. He slowly raised his hands and started pushing the weapon down, and you let him since you couldn't do it yourself.

"Who are you?" You asked him once you had found your voice.

"It's alright, I'm Anakin Skywalker. I'm a Jedi, and I can help you off this planet," he answered. "I could take you as far as Coruscant, if you like."

You bit your tongue and changed your mind. I'm not okay with anything! you decided, I wanted anything but a Jedi. The Jedi were the people you had tried to escape in coming here. You had thought you wanted to be one at one time, but they had rejected you when you had failed their ridiculous trials. Now there was one here, though you had chosen to live on one of the most remote planets you could find. You were angry with him though you knew it was not him alone that had denied you the position.

"Well, I'm very glad you've found a way to get home," you said, trying to maintain a steady voice. "You can do so alone. I wish you luck." With that, you spun around and headed back to the home you had made. Sloshing footsteps and swinging branches told you that he was stumbling right behind.

"Hold on!" He called after you. You were nearly running, and you would've kept going, but this was the only social interaction you would get for who knew how long. You rolled your eyes and slowed so he could catch up. "It's dangerous out here alone," he warned.

You slowly turned around and rolled your eyes. "Is it?" you scoffed and took in a deep breath while you tried to get your thoughts together. "Listen, I do appreciate the offer, but I have no interest in heading back to anywhere the Jedi Council is."

"What do you mean back?" he questioned. "You mean you've been there before?"

You glared at him. "Do the Jedi now find things easy to forget?" you felt yourself shaking and tried desperately to stand completely still. You're not mad at him, you told yourself. You knew you shouldn't be mad at all, but it grew more difficult the more he spoke.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what you're talking about," Anakin apologized. "But at least let me take you to a safer, more populated planet." You almost laughed now.

Gesturing to land around, you responded, "Even if I wanted to leave, how would we?" Anakin looked around.

"I'd find a way," He insisted. You knew there was really nothing he could do, but you liked his determination.

Still, you weren't sold on the idea of returning. "Well," you started hesitantly. "If you're going to find a way back, you'll need a place to stay." You gestured for him to follow you. He was surprisingly good at navigating through the mud. He knew exactly where to step and where not to. You guessed it was the Force showing him the way. It had for you, too, before you memorized the land. When you got to the lake that was not far from your tree house, you made Anakin scrub off all the sand off his arms and neck.

When you made it back to your home you showed Anakin the way up the tree. "You built this?" He asked you once he was at the top.

You nodded proudly. "It took me a while, but it finally came together." You ran your hand across the railing you had put up. You were rather proud of your work and had a right to be. It was sturdy and homely which was perfect for where you lived. "You could probably stay just outside my kitchen for now. Tomorrow I'll have to make a proper bed for you."

Anakin nodded to show he understood then looked questioningly at you. "If I'm going to stay here, I need to know your name."

You had completely forgotten to introduce yourself! You scolded yourself inwardly. "Y/N," you told him.

He smiled "Thank you for offering your home to me, Y/N" You knew he was just being polite. He wouldn't have the comfort of a bed like the one you had made, and you couldn't make one now. You didn't have the items you would need, and it was getting too dark to gather any.

"I recommend you don't leave the house until dawn," you suggested. "The creatures here love the dark."

"I wont," he assured you. Even though he was a Jedi, you knew you couldn't leave him to figure that out on his own.

You would help him the best you could. You didn't hate him. In fact, you found it hard to dislike him. But it was impossible to ignore his title: Jedi. Just thinking the name made you shudder.  You wished him a good night, and Anakin took his robe off and lay down on one of your pillows. He pulled the robe over himself to stay warm and you went to your moss bed. It was actually a nice, comfortable bed that took you a while to complete. You looked over at Anakin who was still awake, staring up at the sky, and your stomach twisted. He wanted to go home, but you couldn't help him do that. The best you could do was make sure he didn't freeze, starve, or get killed by ravenous animals, so that's what you would do. You would keep him alive until he could get back home.

________________________________________________________________________________

You woke up earlier than usual and dressed quickly. You decided to go hunting in hopes of finding some meat to balance out the root stew you would make. As you slipped the cotton shirt over your head, you realized that you didn't have any extra clothes for Anakin to change into, and his clothes were still covered in mud that had dried over. Surely, it wasn't a comfortable way to live. You walked over to Anakin who was fidgeting and stirring in his sleep. You would have to make him a change of clothes as soon as possible.

You grabbed your spear and knife and climbed down the tree easily. You wanted to do this quickly so you could start working on the other projects Anakin's arrival had made for you. You waited at some rocks near the lake with your knife in hand. Nudj, you knew, were lizard-like creatures that stayed around this area. You had only killed a few before, but they weren't bad. When a brave nudj climbed the rocks you quickly threw your knife and pierced it's skin. It thrashed for a second before falling still. You knew the alarm it let out would warn the others and keep you from getting anymore from there. You retrieved the knife and nudj and headed to a different patch of rocks. You repeated this pattern four more times until you had three of the lizards to take back. You jogged back to the tree and climbed up. Anakin was awake.

"Good morning," you called to him. His face was pale and there were beads of sweat on his forehead. "Are you okay?"

He nodded. "Yes, I'm fine." You looked him over worriedly. Treating disease was not something you could cram into today. Deciding to leave him be, you started preparing a stew from roots herbs and the nudj you caught earlier. Anakin came up to you and watched for a little bit.

You turned to him while the stew cooked. "Have you figured out how you'll be getting back?" you questioned.

He shook his head. "No, I haven't, but I'll find a way," he answered confidently. Surely he knew he wouldn't be able to. The only thing that flew on the planet were the bogwings, and you didn't want to mess with them.

"I'll have to make you a change of clothes," you told him. "I'll do that after we eat." You turned back to the food and stirred it.

"Thank you," Anakin said. You pointed to a small pot you had sitting by.

"If you're going to stay here though," you announced. "You'll have to help and boil some of that water."

He smiled and took the full pot to a small fire you had going.

After you and Anakin had finished eating, you walked over to a bin where you kept thread and fabric. You hadn't expected to use it really so you were happy you found a use for it. You sent Anakin to wash the dishes, but it didn't keep him busy for long. He came to where you were working.

"Tell me about the time you were with the Jedi council," he requested.

You stiffened. Of course, he would be curious, but you didn't want to talk about it. You just wanted him to have a magical solution to leave and do so. You hesitated, trying to play out the conversation in your head.

"When I was younger," you started. "All I wanted to be was a Jedi. I looked up to them and my parents did too." A lump formed in your throat. "They noticed me, finally, and I trained for a long time until I became a Padawan. I wasn't long after that my parents were killed. I couldn't preform as well as they wanted me to. I could only think about them, hoping they would come back. It devastated me, and at times, I even felt resentment--hatred. You know that's not acceptable for Jedi." You inhaled deeply and wiped a tear from your cheek with your fingertips. "They expelled me, and I left. I was angry with the council." You gritted your teeth. "I was angry with Master Yoda."

Anakin looked puzzled. "Master Yoda is very wise," he defended. "I'm sure he had a good reason."

You wiped your face and looked at him reasonably. "Master Yoda has it all wrong," you argued. "There has never once been a Jedi who has kept to the code completely. Our emotions make us human, and those that embrace that are the ones he wants to get rid of. He can't turn us into his mindless, emotionless robots to fight his battles for him."

Anakin was silent. The whole time you were talking your hands were working on the outfit for him.

"But never mind," you attempted a smile. "I finished your outfit." You turned around while Anakin switched his clothes. When he was finished you turned back to see your work. You laughed out loud. The clothes looked absolutely ridiculous. They were baggy and blended into each other making it look like one piece.

"Well, it's a start," he teased, smiling. "At least now I'm not covered in sand from head to toe."

You made a note to yourself to practice your seamstress skills later.

You had just finished the bed for Anakin when the sun sank behind the trees. He slept on it well the first night, but he grew restless from nightmares that not even the most comfortable of beds could fix. You often had to sit by his bed with a cold cloth to calm him. He told you they were of his mother. He had to watch her die over and over again every night and it made him miserable. You did the best you could, but that wasn't much. There were nights when he would wake up suddenly, and you would have to speak quietly and soothingly to him until he could fall asleep again. At first it bothered you, but it troubled you more now.

Anakin had stayed with you for two weeks before a ship landed right next to the lake where you were gathering water one day. You dropped the bucket and ran to the ship. The door opened and a light-haired, bearded man emerged confidently. His eyes were tired but that didn't change how he acted.

"Hello there!" he called to you. "Allow me to introduce myself: I'm Obi-Wan Kenobi. Could you give me a hand with something?" Stunned you nodded and beckoned him forward. "I'm sorry about landing here without permission. I didn't think this planet was populated. I'll leave soon, but I seem to have lost something and I need help finding it," he explained.

"What did you loose?" you asked him, though you could already guess. Obi-Wan looked at you warily.

"His name is Anakin Skywalker."

You froze. When Anakin arrived, the thought that he might have someone looking for him hadn't even occurred to you. He was back at the tree house preparing food for the both of you. You weren't sure if you should get him or not. As if he heard his name called Anakin came running up from behind you.

Obi-Wan perked up. "Anakin!" He called cheerfully. "I'm glad you're alive, Anakin. You had us all worried." Despite the fact that this man had brought Anakin a way home, he didn't look all that happy.

"You shouldn't have come for me, Master." Anakin said. "You could've saved supplies and time going on without me."

"Anakin don't talk like that," Obi-Wan commanded. "You are my friend, and I will not leave you like that."

Obi-Wan looked at you. "I thank you for any help you have given my young apprentice. You will be paid in whatever currency you find acceptable." He turned back to Anakin. "Let's go, Anakin. Master Yoda will be happy to know you're alright."

Your heart sank. Anakin had found a way to leave after all. This is what you wanted. You reminded yourself. Once he's gone, life will be normal again. Boring and normal. You didn't want him to go now, but what could you do? It was Anakin's decision, and he was already following his master. You stood there waiting for the ship to take off, but it never did. In fact the door opened once again and both of them walked out.

"Is everything okay?" You questioned with a small glimmer of hope that the ship might not start. Anakin was looking much happier now and Obi-Wan more upset.

"It appears," Obi-Wan spoke first. "That Anakin will be staying with you," he explained.

You looked at Anakin who was next to you now.

"Are you serious?" you asked quietly, though your heart was beating rapidly.

He looked up at Obi-Wan. "Thank you for your training, Master," he said respectfully. Obi-Wan nodded blankly.

"I don't know what I'll tell the council," he said almost talking to himself.

Anakin smiled. "I'm sure you'll think of something," he assured. Obi-Wan looked up and smiled.

"Yes, well, I'll still have to pay you, Y/N," he said. "I'll go and get whatever supplies you'll need." He looked at Anakin again and laughed. "And good heavens hopefully some proper clothes." You both laughed merrily. You felt wonderful and couldn't stop smiling.

Obi-Wan left and Anakin hugged you tightly.

"You're really staying," you whispered.

He chuckled. "Yes, I am." He pulled away and looked into your eyes. "You were right, Y/N. I shouldn't try to push any emotions aside anymore." He rested his hand on your cheek. "I love you, Y/N." He grabbed your hand. "Let's go home."

[okimargarvez]

YEAH - Sweet & soft (11)

Original title: Yeah. Prompt: post 15x10, choose your finale for the garvez date. Warning: crossroad, smut. Genre: angst, funny, romantic. Characters: Penelope Garcia, Luke Alvez, Roxy, Lou, Sergio. Pairing: Garvez. Note: oneshot 79 in Garvez collection. Legend: 💏 😘😈🐶. Song mentioned: Assurdo pensare, Tiziano Ferro.

Yeah - masterlist

GARVEZ STORIES

*K*: Sweet & soft

-Thank you very much, but we have a connoisseur here.- the girl immediately focuses her attention on Penelope, who blushes visibly and her makeup, not too heavy, fails to cover her reaction in any way. The man looks at her with heart eyes and anyone would be able to understand what he is feeling. He loves all kinds of reactions from her, even though she probably thinks otherwise, she feels childish. She throws him a reproachful look.

-Come on, Luke, don't overdo it.- she moves one of her graceful hands as if to chase away an invisible fly. Then she shrugs. -I can speak a little Italian.- she admits then, reluctantly, painting an embarrassed half smile on her lips.

The young waitress approaches her, amazed, positively impressed. -Really?- all the sad and self-destructive thoughts that she had elaborated, convinced that the other woman was hitting on Luke, vanish. It was her mind, as usual, that never misses an opportunity to make her life even more complicated… and to keep her from being happy. As if she was convinced she didn't deserve it. She has never talked about this tendency of hers even with the various psychologists... let alone with one of the men with whom she had a relationship, no matter how long and serious. But with Luke… it could go differently. She feels within herself that he has this right, this privilege. -Tell me then.- Penelope looks for the eyes of her companion, his approval.

-Well, I thought...- and he immediately understands her, smiling at her and even taking her hand. It is in that instant that she realizes that doesn't care how many women will flirt with Luke... she is the only one who occupies his thoughts. He looks only at her in that way. And it is a clear thing, evident to anyone.

He even begins to caress her fingers, taking away from her concentration and cognitive abilities. -Order for both of us, I totally trust your taste.- Damn, she thinks, cursing him, while the love towards him grows to the point that it seems impossible that she has not yet exploded. She feels filled with her feeling for Luke, so much so that she is in a frenzy that is difficult to manage. She nearly stands up, dragging him out with her. They don't need to go out to dinner like mere mortals, they are meant to be something, to be together. But she doesn't want to disappoint the waitress.

She looks down at the menu. -... Tagliatelle with mushrooms?-her eyes are instantly captured by Luke's, who nods, encouraging. She sighs, realizing only after it has been a manifestation of relief and not annoyance.

The girl becomes even more radiant when her face opens into a sincere smile, yet Luke stubbornly continues to stare at her, she notices it out of the corner of her eye, but it no longer appears to her as absurd, but logical, right. Wouldn't Will do the same to JJ? And Mendoza? -Wow, I absolutely approve.- she gently grabs the menus, then drops down, speaking in a confidential tone. -I shouldn't say it, but I was quite tired of serving the usual spaghetti allo scoglio or bucatini all'amatriciana.- Penelope struggles to not laugh, thinking that time she and Kevin tried to learn Italian for their trip in the so-called Bel Paese. -May I recommend a red?- the man takes a few seconds longer to understand that she is referring to wine. -We import it directly from Italy.- it is impossible to say no in the face of so much enthusiasm. Plus… red has always been her favorite. Who knows what Luke's is? Maybe he's neutral. You don't have to take sides...

She still sees him nod, so she realizes she hasn't given her a clear answer yet. -Of course. Thanks.- with a last smile, the girl vanishes heading for the kitchen. And despite all the good thoughts of her running through her head, she finds herself putting him to the test. -Hey, the waitress is really nice.- she ventures, throwing the bait and feeling deeply petty for it.

In any case, he doesn't take the bait at all and not because he has noticed the trap and has therefore avoided it. No, he just replies a -Yes- very distracted, clearly not interested in discussing the matter. She may not know, but he is in fact thinking about how pretty she is, in fact more than just pretty. Maybe not many men in this club would think like him, but he honestly… doesn't care. For him she is beautiful, sexy, she lights up both his mind and his body, she was the first to force him to behave like an idiot, to put work in second place... -At least you'll have a little piece of Italy.- his hand starting to caress her fingers again, scared to death by the idea that it may be too much, that he is going beyond, but instantly reassured by a splendid smile, extremely… sweet. Penelope moves her fingers but not to slip away from his grip, but to make them intertwine with the male ones. They look into each other's eyes intensely and for a moment the background noise disappears completely; then the blonde lets her gaze fall on their union and he can only follow her. They stare at the magnificent contrast between their skin tones.

Then she opens her mouth, replying to his sentence as if only a second has passed. -Only thanks to you.- her voice is a whisper, she almost as if she were afraid of being heard, rather than wanting it. It was almost as if she were reflecting on something other than a simple Italian dinner. For the first time, a somewhat heavy silence falls, too full of expectations, despite the fact that they both feel that no matter what they say or do, one cannot fight against fate. We need to take a cue from Revenge, learn from her mistakes: every time the psychic teenager combined a lot of trouble trying to prevent her visions from coming true... and in fact, she got the opposite. They can change the route, but not the destination. That's why she comes up with that question, which she really cares about… but not right now. -How are you all doing without me?- she feels him getting stiff, his hand isn't exactly warm. -Have you found someone yet?- Luke snorts and rolls his eyes. And he is extremely sexy.

-You just don't want to give up, huh? - a bit of malice in the midst of that sea of ​​sweetness. -You've been through it already, you know how it works.- he doesn't let go of her, at all, gradually relaxing his fingers again between her lighter ones, but he doesn't even look into her eyes... even though he feels her gaze upon himself. -It's tough, but we'll make it.- he knows that her dark eyes right now are a radar on to detect a possible lie. In fact, once her system didn't work… but better not think about something so sad and ugly, not now. He shrugs. -JJ is the one who manifests it most openly but... We are all happy for you, if you are happy in your new place.- because it is clear that everyone misses her, even him, not only as a friend, but as a computer analyst... but just think of her belittling her stalker, crying for Reid, in front of Walker's corpse... to understand why it was better this way. Besides, he… he could never ask her out if she stayed. Something tells him that she would not have said yes, regardless of the rules, that she would never have lived in a secret relationship (how can she avoid telling the team, at least?). And she wouldn't even let him drop the BAU, change the area again, so there could be no conflicts. So, better this way.

Penelope seems to read through him, every single sentence that passes through the anteroom of his brain. -Yes, Luke, I am.- and the same goes for him. it makes him sad seeing her depressed because she feels guilty, guilty of being happy somewhere else. But not enough to go back, thankfully. And then, Luke realizes that there is behind a lot more. -I always felt like I didn't do enough for animals and now I can finally make my contribution.- ah, here, let alone. Something suggests to him that she will never be satisfied with herself, with what she has done, because she can always do more. And she's right, though… it will be his job to also convince her that if she hasn't done everything, she has done enough anyway. Very very much. -What?- she asks him. He barely holds the lump in his throat. He wants to cry, laugh, well... behave like a madman, a fool as he feels. Because she is too much. Unreal. And she doesn't even notice, and that makes her even more fantastic.

With a willpower that he believed was now lost, he manages to hold back and simply shake hìs head. -Nothing, I'm just looking for a discreet way to pinch myself, because this can't be real.- she doesn't understand, of course not, in this case. -I'm here, having dinner with the woman of my dreams, the best person I've ever met.- she likes that definition, so much. Not that it might bother anyone, but the way she lights up, even if only for a moment... it convinces him that, outside of the team, Morgan's... well, no man she's been in a relationship with has ever said something like this to her. Bad, but he will fix it.

In fact, she begins to vibrate. -Luke...- her tone is threatening, but like a four-month-old kitten could be ruffling his fur to look bigger. So, mostly ridiculous, but in a tender way. And he is too excited to want to laugh, luckily for him. He would have risked tasting her nails… and although this will happen sooner or later, it will be in a very different context.

He forces himself to watch her as she goes on. -I exaggerated, I know.- she doesn't reply anything, not agreeing with him. -But that's what I really think of you.- he doesn't even know what reaction he expects. Perhaps an embarrassed chuckle, which confirms his words; perhaps that instead she looks at him in a state of shock, or that she stands up, even overturning the chair, perhaps, to make everything more scenographically attractive. Instead, Penelope reaches out and intertwines their fingers again. This time he decides to make one thing more, lifting her hand up and bringing it to his lips, before returning to the table. However, the atmosphere is broken by the arrival of the dishes. Neither of them glares at the waitress.

Nobody shoots the messenger and... after all she is just doing her job. That aura can easily be recreated, because it depends on them, not on other external factors. -Here is the bottle.- says the young woman. Penelope doesn't have time to decline the offer.

Luke is quicker and she falls silent as soon as her ears hear his quiet, gentle voice. -Yes, thank you.- the other woman approves, almost winking at her, before leaving them alone again.

Penelope begins to wrap the pasta around the fork, cursing herself and her choice. She could also have opted for something less… open to embarrassing situations. -Luke, but do you know how much it costs?- she takes it then with him, venting her anxiety on her favorite victim.

He doesn't take it. He shakes his head. -No, I can imagine it but... Only the best for my lady.- he sees her half-open her mouth as if to comment, but then nothing comes out of her. She just stares at him in the usual way, like "who are you, are you really agent Alvez?". -La reina de mi corazon.- he exclaims, speaking in Spanish. This is definitely one of the most erotic things he can do. She feels a strong heat in her chest. -The queen of...- she blocks his translation, proud of herself and smiling.

-I understood it.- she says, with a confident tone. -You know, after you teased me too, I decided to learn at least a few sentences.- she mentions, provoking him and aware of the consequences she will face. He doesn't disappoint her. He concentrates on the pasta, rolling up a portion of tagliatelle, but without bringing it to his mouth.

He looks at her as if she were naked, with such greed that it frightens her. If she were another woman. But it so happens that she is Penelope Garcia, the (former) sex bomb of the Bureau, the undisputed genius of the BAU (along with Reid). -It was not just a provocation, chica.- well, he said so. How much she missed it! Even he understands it, because he watches her bite her lip right with the nickname. -It never was.- he adds, more seriously.

Penelope nods. -Now maybe I could believe it.- so they finally dedicate themselves to the dishes, eating without stopping to exchange sweet glances, with just a few tips of chilli. He is much quicker than she is, but he is good to shilly-shally, not wanting to leave her alone to finish or feel pressured to speed up the pace. -How is it possible that you have been single for so long?- she asks him at one point, when he pours her a drink for the umpteenth time. Every neuron in the Latin agent's brain is concentrated on the act, especially because if he raises his eyes he risks seeing her delicate fingers wrapped around the stem. -You are practically the knight that every woman would want at their side.- she said it, she said it and she does not intend to deny it later. Her determined look on him is valid as confirmation in this sense. -Or should I thank...- she can't say that name right now. -You know, don't you?- so she leaves it suspended in the air, invisible like the ghost that Lisa seemed for a while.

But the atmosphere freezes a bit. -Uh, no, not really .- he hears her sigh, as he takes breath and courage, as if it were the rumble of thunder. -I know it will make me lose points but... I wasn't exactly the boyfriend of your dreams.- and he no longer intends to lie to her, no more. She must want him for better and for worse, with all his suitcase of flaws. -I suck, but I think it's right that you know.- he admits, in fact, fearing that he had ruined everything, but the alternative would have been to always live in the balance, with the fear that she might find out who he was really with and therefore anyway... break up with him… breaking his heart completely. She still looks uncertain. -Only with you, only with you, I spontaneously do these things.- he then adds, blushing. -Help you get off the sidewalk, just to take you by the hand...- and long before she broke up with him. -If you think I have ever done it with her...- he understands that she doesn't want him to say that name. -... With another, then you have a better opinion of me than I thought.- he concludes his delusional speech with a nice crazy smile.

Penelope swallows, then she pokes her head up and down at least a couple of times. Both of their plates are empty. -Ok, we can ask for the bill, because there is no need for dessert.- better than he had dared to hope. He nods at her, delighted to see how she waits for him so she can help her up. She takes him by the arm, then they go to the counter to pay.

Outside, however, he struggles to keep up with her, however fast she walks. Although it reassures him that she has not freed herself from the bond that binds her to him. -Hey. Are you in a hurry to go home?- he asks her, when they have almost reached the car and his spleen begins to throb. She shakes her head, but there is something strange in her gaze. No, he won't let her fears get the better of her. -So why does it look like you're taking part in the New York marathon?- she doesn't answer, so he takes her face gently in his hands. -Penelope, did I say something wrong?- and here he hit the right keystroke.

-No!- she snaps, like a cobra. -You were perfect.- she reassures him, calming herself at the same time. She places her hands on his neck, then strokes his cheek, slowly, discovering new sensations, the smooth surface of her skin against Luke's beard. -Everything was perfect.- she whispers, catching his eyes again, as he lowered his lids to enjoy that first (of a long series) show of affection.

But he is confused by her attitude. -So...- she doesn't allow him to wallow in doubt for much longer.

She clicks her tongue between her teeth, annoyed by not being able to find the words she would like, to explain herself, something not so trivial. But then she gives up. -It's just that I wish it would never end.- ah, what a stupid thing she seems to have said.

He lifts her chin. -Look at me.- she executes it without protesting. -Me neither.- everything seems suitable, as a backdrop for their first kiss, yet it doesn't happen. They take the few steps that separate them from his car, of course he helps her up and she strokes his arm as a thank you. As soon as they are on board they sing love songs like two fools, not worrying about appearing out of tune, but low enough not to wake the inhabitants of every building they pass.

They stop only when Penelope recognizes her way (and he too), turning down the radio. Her sigh echoes in the cockpit. -Well we have arrived.- she announces, as if it were necessary. -So...- Luke undoes her belt first and then his, freeing her from him.

-Let me take you to the front door.- he whispers and she stares at him as if hypnotized. -I could never sleep peacefully, otherwise.- it's too much. The armor that she had built unwittingly between herself and whoever tried to romantically enter her heart, it shatters.

-Oh, Luke, I...- she is finally ready to say it and take it seriously, not as a friend or part of the family. She hesitates for just a second.

And so they end up saying it together. -I love you.- she reaches out to him, who leans in her direction and their lips meet. There is too much sweetness to pass the word even to their tongues, and both are no longer in a hurry, because they now know they belong together. He turns off the engine and lets her out, accompanying her into the apartment complex, to her door. You are never too cautious. He no longer wants to have regrets, or at least he would like to reduce the number.

-Goodnight.- she whispers, with her back leaning against her door. But he lifts her face so that their mouths melt again.

Luke then echoes her, staying a few millimeters from her lips. -Goodnight.- and giving in to the temptation to snatch yet another kiss. It takes a lot of "good nights" before he can break away, turn around and go home. But not without giving her one last (yet another) look.

Go to the ending: O

-

Tags: @princesstreaclefanfic @dittokld @londonrosebooklovingwitch @inlovewithgarvaz

Tell me if you want to be removed or re-added to the tags ^^

[shinahbee]

February Favs 2021

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GREETINGS

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March 6. 2021

Hello!

Another month has passed by really quickly, maybe because February had only 28 days.

This month also was lunar new years or Chinese New Year, so happy new year to all of you who celebrate it! Our household celebrated safely with just my family, in previous years we would celebrate with extended families, but of course every one’s safety is important.

There was also Valentine’s Day, which I helped my sister make some cheese tarts for her boyfriend as a gift. I’ve been working on a few things, including art for more of my manhwa recommendations, but I’ll put that on hold for now and work on a few for some recent anime that I have been watching. I feel like I’m winding down when it comes to filtering the shounen ai manhwa, there really isn’t much that I have read currently that I want to really want to share.

There are some of the ones that are popular that I dropped, I named two of them in my last favorites, but there have been a lot more since then, if you’d like I could add another segment under the hell segment that talk about the ones I dropped and why I dropped them, I feel like if someone had similar thoughts to a certain manhwa and why they dislike the content , It would honestly help me filter out a lot of the ones I never really should have read, if that makes any sense.

Not instagram though...it keeps showing me the pictures of manhwa that I dropped ...I’m like omg instagram your algorithm is screwed...I don’t even like these.lol. Thus this is how it thought of the new segment idea. I feel like I’m adding a lot to this segment alone.lol.

So how is everything going for all of you? Anything exciting happening? I’ll keep you guys updated when something good happens, but there is nothing currently. Thank you for taking the time to read my nonsense blabbering.

Enjoy reading!

Sheena

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DRAMAS:

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No dramas this month to talk about.lol.

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MANHWA/MANGA/WEBTOONS:

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Recap:

1) Whose baby is it? (ongoing)

2) Social temperature (ongoing)

3) Salad days (ongoing)

4) To be or not to be (ongoing)

5) Path to you (Completed)

6) Here u are (Completed)

7) BJ Alex (Completed)

8) No way, vampires don't exist (ongoing)

9) Unintentional love story (ongoing)

10) Karasugoka don’t be shy! (Completed)

11) Semantic Error (ongoing)

12) Tied up in Twins (Completed)

13) My Suha (ongoing)

14) Crash into me (Completed)

15) Dine with a vampire (ongoing)

16) Inner beauty (Completed)

17) False memories (Completed)

18) Hand in Hand (Completed)

19) Stanning 101 (ongoing)

20) Private lessons (Completed)

21) Behind the scenes (Completed)

22) Turn off the camera (Ongoing)

Updates on ongoing titles:

So I thought I would start off with some updates on some of the titles in the recap section since it has been a while since I last talked about them.

No way vampires don’t exist:

This is almost done soon so I’m glad that the manhwa updates are consistent, what I didn’t know is that there were extra chapters of side stories for this manhwa, and I discovered them through a Chinese manga site, I really hope the licensed site will be able to translate these as well cause it goes into the later lives of all the housemates and of course an in depth development of juwon and dongha’s relationship which I am living for since they are so cute. Lol.

I really hope these get translated since my Chinese is lacking, I’ve just seen the raws and thought I may be able to read them but of course my 8 years of Chinese school has failed me once again.

Dine with a vampire:

This manhwa is giving me so much gripe when discussing the story so far, the recent update of course was a little better in showing the relationship between chi hwan and sooin, so i’m happy they got their feelings across to each other and sooin was able to really begin to trust people again. BUT....I was spoiled by the raws for this week’s update, and let me give a big F*CK you to that harry potter asshole...I still don’t know his name, i think my memory did me a favor and selectively removed it for my mind. I obviously can’t spoil all of  it for you but stuff happens and harry potter has found his way to sooin and basically kidnapped him while he was vulnerable and he’s trying to make him his partner...I’m like...great...In all honesty let’s look at this situation in modern society, think about a person who had made your life living hell, who then dies and you think that’s the end of it , but this asshole still haunts you even after death and still tormenting you...i’m not going to lie, I honestly think I would just kill myself at this point.

I feel like when I first read this manhwa , I thought it was disgusting but I still read it thinking that it will be better, it’s like watching season one of a show and being annoyed hoping that it will get better later and then finding out in season two is just...I need anger management.

I really hope what I think might happen will not but the author seems to be a sadist, so it might end up that way. Props to the creator for making one of the most detestable characters i’ve seen so far. I will watch out for people like this in my actual life.

Semantic Error:

This is updating a little slow and again I tried reading the raws, but of course that didn’t go too well, from what i’ve seen there is a bit of character development between the two main leads so far. Also I’ve seen on twitter that semantic error is going to get a mini anime adaptation, in Korean of course but that is so awesome either way! This is one of the manhwa’s I would like to see an anime of because it’s really good.

In terms of Japanese anime seiyuu who would play these roles I wonder? Sungwoo I feel like anyone can since he’s very ambiguous, but for jaeyoung, I think I’d like to hear sakurai takahiro ( cloud from ff7, miyuki kazuya from daiya no ace) play him, in all honesty it’s because of his role as miyuki in daiya no ace, jaeyoung is basically the same character but more intense.lol.

Turn off the Camera:

Oh this piece of work, i’m glad this is completely satire because if I were to take this story seriously I would have an aneurysm thinking about all the bad choices these people have been making. So recently, our boy jihoon who wanted to protect his virginity from the two co-stars has finally lost it to yoojin, one of the co-stars. I’ve heard a lot of people say they don’t know about him because his intentions are still very unknown, and I agree that I don’t know what his intentions are but from what I've seen, it’s not like he treats jihoon badly, he won’t do anything that jihoon would not like so i’m not opposed to it, but I really would like to see romantic development between jihoon and yohan because of how straight forward yohan is, he isn’t hiding his intentions and says whatever is on his mind, it’s reassuring knowing that there’s nothing he would hide.

Jihoon doesn’t really seem interested but it’s more like that push and pull relationship, where despite him not seeming interested he still had a wet dream about having sex with him...lol. Where as with yoojin, Jihoon does not oppose to having intimacy with him. So we’ll see how this dumpster fire plays out as it continues. I absolutely HATE love triangles cause this whole concept alone is so unrealistic, it’s hard enough to get ONE person interested in me, this dude has like 2 without really doing anything. Also it’s just really messy and annoying to read and I always want to route for the guy who never wins.lol.

This is merely a suggestion, but I feel like authors should make alternative endings with different characters, if you think about this in a realistic perspective, you can end up with different people depending on the decisions you make, which is why harems exist in this genre, because there is not just one person you can love, and how alternative timelines can exist. So if the author would consider this idea and make alternative endings for the main character, then I would feel more satisfied with the story overall, because i’m always wondering what if...he ends up with this person ? What would that be like? This only applies to love triangles where abuse doesn’t happen, because there’s no way I would be happy with an abuse victim ending up with their abuser...

Anyways, that is all the updates that I have for you, in this heaven segment I’m going to talk about some titles that I don’t really think is that popular but I decided to read them after reading the summary and they turned out better than I thought.

In the hell segment, I’m going to be discussing some manhwa titles that are a bit “ quirky” you know in my hero academia where these kids were each born with a super power, seem like some of these manhwa characters also have unique abilities, which I will refer to as “ quirks” in this segment. Let me tell you...there are some interesting ones out there.

So let’s begin.

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Welcome to heaven

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Murderous Lewellyn Candelit Dinner:

“Shevon is a writer who lives in a run-down apartment in the streets of the slums. One day, strange memos start showing up at his front door. Before he can uncover the mystery behind them, he encounters a beautiful young man that keeps peeling onions on the staircase next to his unit. After accepting a dinner invitation from the young man, Shevon discovers a dead body in his host’s bedroom...”

Okay so starting off with this one, it’s very different than the usual types that I would read. This story is more of a mystery drama with implied romance, but I have yet to see that happening in the story so far. It is fairly new so I suppose it will be a slow development. Like the summary for the manhwa says, it is a about a guy named Shevon, who I believe is a writer that is trying to get a job at a writing firm, but he ended up free lancing for a while with no luck of getting a paid job. He was being harassed by an ex boyfriend when he encounters his neighbor that is sitting on the stairs peeling onions. Since that day, Shevon would always run into his neighbor peeling onions while exchanging small talk with him, which makes him curious about why he does this at the same time each day, one day his neighbor wanted to invite him over for dinner and Shevon obliged due to being curious and other advances the neighbor has made to get his attention. As he went up to his neighbor's apartment he noticed that he had a bunch of candles lining every inch of his apartment and there was a very strong smell coming from here. Lewellyn (neighbor) just says that it was the onions that he had been peeling, he wanted to use them for tonight's dinner. Shevon didn’t want to just eat onions...I mean who does. So he told him that he will make him a proper meal instead. So he was in the kitchen making food when the door bell rang and Lewellyn went to check who it was. Shevon didn’t see him for a while and decided to just head back to the dining area, but before he could head there the smell from earlier was getting stronger and he noticed it coming from a certain room, he opened it and there lays a dead corpse surrounded by candles covered in blood. Being shocked accidentally took the candle he used to light up the room and left the room; just as Lewellyn entered he said he had to leave for the day.

After that incident there were suspicious activities involving Shevon’s apartment, such as the name plate on his door being moved, the feeling of being watched when he was alone in the room, and some creepy mail he had been receiving, which all points to the fact that he had a stalker.

Shevon starts to suspect Lewellyn as a murderer because of the obvious corpse found in his apartment, but there was no evidence he could find to report him, meanwhile the stalking had been getting worse he found himself getting more entangled with Lewellyn than he’d like to be.

So yeah, it was really creepy when you read those letters, so far we knew Lewellyn is involved in some sort of murder and although he has been helping Shevon find the suspect he himself is also one as well. It’s still too early to make judgments as to what actually is going on, there’s a lot of mystery behind Lewellyn that isn’t explained yet.

So if you like murder mysteries you might like this manhwa, I don’t see any romance involving them yet, but maybe curiosity will lead to something eventually.

Unripened Expression:

“Jaewon has known that he likes males since he confessed his feelings to a boy named Yoonsung in elementary school, but when Yoonsung tells him that liking other boys is weird, Jaewon tries to hide his "weird" feelings and push them away. Now in high school, he's developed a strong crush on his kind, handsome classmate Karam, and Jaewon decides it's time to finally confront the reality that he might be gay. He asks for advice over the internet and befriends another gay student named Junseo, who becomes Jaewon's emotional support in his quest to win Karam's heart.”

So for this one it was not listed as a harem but it actually is, all the guys you see on the cover is related to the main character so how. I usually don’t like harems in any genre, but this one wasn’t as bad as I thought. Actually every guy in here was a good contender and I was not upset with who he chose in the end even though it would be obvious in the first chapter who he would end up with...lol. and you know me, always picking the “ other guy” in these situations, I really do have bad second lead syndrome.

They guy I wanted him the end up with is named “ junseo ” he’s the gay friend that jaewon the main character met on an online forum while asking questions about his sexuality, they felt comfortable enough to exchange numbers but not give their identity away to each other. Jaewon realizes that from talking to Junseo that he went to the same school he did, coincidently, and found out his identity through his friend. Junseo didn’t want to associate with jaewon but he was really persistent. Junseo then gave up and decided to listen to jaewon whenever he wanted to talk.

Junseo had some trauma in the past involving a ex boyfriend and getting bullied at school when someone found him kissing his boyfriend in a room and started spreading rumors of them together, but instead of just denying it, his ex boyfriend accused junseo of leading him on and that’s why junseo ended up being bullied and shut himself off from people, even though he forced to leave school cause of all the bullying he endured he still understood why his ex boyfriend did that, everyone had to protect themselves first after all.

After opening up to jaewon and telling him his story, jaewon cried because he was sorry he had to go through that. Junseo was happy that someone would cry for him, who had just accepted everything until now. Their time together lead to some feelings developing between jaewon and him but although jaewon is aware he has feelings for junseo, it doesn’t compare to the feelings he had for karam..Which is the guy he ended up with.

Okay. Compared to karam who didn’t have much development, junseo had a much better chance to be perfectly honest. It’s not that I don’t like karam, he just didn’t have much back up story to convince me that his feelings for jaewon is real. Lol

But I guess that’s the trope in these types of manhwa right? The Main character always ends up with the guy that he meets first...OMG. Come on authors ...work with me here and try something different for once. Anyways, it’s all good it’s not like any of them were sexually harassing and/or abusing jaewon so I’m happy with whoever he chose.

If you are into harems with good characters, you might like this one.

Oh! My Assistant: (18 +)

“Naive comic artist Seonho, who draws R-19 series, hires beauty(?)-and-brains Muyoung with outstanding skills to be his assistant. However, working with Muyoung who is too task-oriented and has a prickly temperament, turns out to be a little difficult. Seonho asks Muyoung to pose for him one day to help with a sexy scene, but when he sees how erotic Muyoung's pose is, Seonho's "junior"... that hasn't stood in 2 years, got up. It's hard! It got hard! It finally got hard! This is an unpredictable, comical and chest-tickling BL story brought to you by Milla and Yalgae!”

The first thing that came to my mind was Oh! My goddess... LOL let me know if you guys have ever watched that anime, i’m really showing my age with that comment.

Anyways, so this is about an adult mahwa artist named Seonho and he was getting really popular and needed an assistant to help with his busy scheduled serialization. He held an interview with a couple of selected candidates after viewing their portfolio, and of course muyoung was chosen out of all for his pristine work. Of course there was several conditions that muyoung had listed in exchange to work here, most of which applies to a 9 to 5 job, but of course artists out there know that we make our own time...we don’t have a scheduled work hours, but of course seonho needed a person soon and he liked muyoung’s work so he hired him under those conditions.

Muyoung was actually the heir to a prosperous kimchi making firm and did not need money because he was already wealthy, but his grandmother wanted him to have some independence and so muyoung wanted to look for a normal job to get his grandma off his back. He quickly learns that not everything that you ask for will be complied there are times where you will need to work late for a dead line and such.

This made muyoung wonder if he should just quit, the only reason he doesn’t is because he liked seonho. He liked seonho since he first laid eyes on him as he is exactly his type.

Without realizing it seonho also thought muyoung is attractive and ended up in situations with him that are presumed romantic. In the end, the two of them ended up together, but of course there’s always an inconvenience that disrupts this romantic development, and this came in the form of his best friend, who is by the way married to a woman, but as you know in BL...that doesn’t matter...

His best friend was actually in love with him for a very long time and the marriage was just a family arrangement that he had no say in. He tried to separate muyoung and his seonho by trying to convince muyoung to quit several times and even got into an accident and used this as an opportunity to guilt trip muyoung to stay by his side.

He basically just said that he would die if muyoung left him alone...now, here is some advice from me, if anyone says that to you don’t believe them, you have no control over what a person does and you are not responsible for any of their actions, so call their bluff on it.

This incident caused some strife between muyoung and seonho’s relationship to the point where it was getting pointless for seonho to keep up something that not working, he wanted to break up with muyoung but after talking to muyoung’s grandmother he decided not to since what muyoung needs is his support at this moment. So they overcame it and muyoung made it clear to his best friend that he had no feelings towards him and that he only loves seonho, which made the friend only, had to accept it. So in the end muyoung and seonho moved in together and continued working as a mahwa company, and even hired a new assistant who strikingly had the same conditions as muyoung when he was first hired.

Lol. In the end this story worked out great, and it was really good read, the drama was minimal though that friend of his was an inconvenience. It was an overall a good story and the relationship development was really cute since muyoung was in love with seonho first, I’ve never seen that happened before actually, so if you like all of my recommendations so far you will like this one as well.

The Good Teacher: (18 +)

“Hojun’s recent breakup was pretty rough. His partner told him it wasn’t him, per say… Hojun just wasn’t good in bed. But it turns out Drunk Hojun is surprisingly resourceful; singlehandedly managing to find and set himself up with a sex tutor by the name of Mr. Ahn. Ahn Seunghyun was only half serious when he posted the sex tutor ad, but he quickly finds himself in too deep to call the lessons off. And the more he sees Hojun, the more he can’t help but notice how much attractive he is. Seunghyun is making it up as he goes along, so what will the final exam look like?”

This is basically “Sex for dummies” .LOL. I don’t know how your sex education went in school, but for me all I remember is that the teachers would leave he girls in classroom where they took the guys out and talked to them about masturbation. So needless to say I didn’t have much of a sex education until later in life. Or you can read this manhwa which basically taught me more that my sex ed teacher ever did.lol.

So basically Ahn seunghyun ( Mr. Ahn) was drinking with his friends and thought that they would pull a prank by posting an ad for a sex tutor, not thinking that anyone would fall for it. But Hojun found the ad and took his chances to reach out to seunghyun, so he decided to play along for the first meeting to see who he was dealing with, he made fake lesson plans and prepare a lot in order to make him sound convincing as a teacher. What started off as a joke became very educational for hojun whom had very little sexual experience and how his previous partners would claim him being very bad in bed. Seunghyun had a lot of patience and taught him from the ground up. I’m not going to lie, this was pretty educational and I think Mr. Ahn looking really fine does not help either.

So as the lessons progress they began to have feelings for each other, one thing that doesn’t add up is the fact the seunghyun is not a n actual teacher to begin with, although he did his research before every lesson he was not a an educator in trade, so he didn’t tell hojun the truth until the end and they had a fight, but made up quickly right after when they both realized their feelings for each other.

Now you’re probably wondering if there is a third wheel in this relationship, well there is a guy who is seunghyun’s ex boyfriend, he was a little bit of an inconvenience but not really causing too much trouble, just enough to make hojun a little jealous, the only thing he was out of line for saying was that three of them should have a threesome...LMAO not with you f*cker you look like Tarzan...lol. Hell no!

I say that but there is a special chapter at the end where hojun was having a nightmare where the three of them did have a three some and it was gross...i’m like wtf he’s so ugly...I can’t imagine anyone thinking this is hot.

Yeah take this as you will, if you lack sexual education I recommend this mahwa to educate yourself cause lord knows when that will be when you get proper education for that. If you liked reading BJ Alex, you may like this one because of the similar art style, if not then just read it for Mr. Ahn..cause he is so fine...lol.

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Welcome to hell

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*Warning *

These titles are suitable for 18+ audiences, because of the mature content in discussion, you have been warned.

So finally onto the hell segment for this month! This month we will be discussing some of the quirky titles, people born with unusual abilities, I have come across a few of them and from that I chose these three to talk about since their stories alone are interesting in many ways.

Whether these stories are satiric or serious, I enjoyed finding out by reading these more hellish stories. So here we go...starting off with...

My purrfect boss:

“Sunwoo is thrilled to be starting his new job! Full of energy and enthusiasm, he’s eager to please Manager Kang. The problem is, he keeps making dumb mistakes and getting in trouble. Things come to a head one night after work when he pours soju all over his boss. Typical! But hang on… Why is Manager Kang blushing like that? And what are those cat ears sprouting from his head?! After discovering his boss’ secret, it isn’t long before Sunwoo has him purring with pleasure.”

Let me start by saying that the funniest thing in this manhwa is that Mr. kang has both cat ears and human ears...lol. How is that possible?

So basically in this story manager kang is an anthromorph, which are humans with animal characteristics, they only make up of the minority of the population. He is basically a human with cat characteristics and has hidden his identity until sunwoo spooked him and his ears popped up from being surprised. This seems to be his “quirk” and of sunwoo being really innocent only wanted to find out what he was, then was caught by Mr. Kang having his heat cycle and sunwoo was dragged into the meeting room where he and the manager had jerked each other off.

Mr kang needs the cone of shame after the next day realizing what he and sunwoo had done. He started to avoid him until they were set up on a business trip together, in which they had to spend the night in the same hotel room. Manager kang looked apologetic for having sex with him just cause he was in heat but sunwoo said that he wasn’t repulsed by it and actually enjoyed it, therefore manager kang proposed they do it again...and so they did...lol. Many times after that too.

And sunwoo became a furry. The end. lol. I’m kidding, but sunwoo really liked manager kang and decided to make it official with him, they decided to see each other but not make it public since he was scared. Later there was another manager from another department who participated in a joint project and that other manager is also an anthromorph and knows manager kang as well. This manager cha was like an ex boyfriend but he calls himself his “owner”. He tried to force manager kang into this abusive play and now he’s scared of him. But even knowing that sunwoo didn’t really give up on manager kang but instead gave him courage to confront his fears and stand up for himself, and if anything it made him love him even more. Even if sunwoo didn’t know much about manager kang the way the other manager did, manager kang listed out all of his favorite things to him so that he does know now.

I really like this part of the story, just because a person’s past partners know more about the person you are dating doesn’t mean they know everything, people’s preferences can change over time and all you have to do is ask. So i’m glad they communicated with each other.

So in the end, sunwoo and manager kang was able to be together and he was thankful for having sunwoo in his life. There’s a lot that happens in between but you’ll have to figure that out on your own by reading it.lol. Can’t say that this story is relatable since I don’t have feline features but it was an interesting read in the end.

The Sales Departments Cupid:

“'Taejun', who has the ability to see auras from people who have been in contact with him since childhood, connects with people with similar auras, and at his company he is known as 'the Cupid of the Sales Department'. Then, Hongyeon, a new employee with a rainbow-colored aura, approaches Taejun...”

In this manhwa, Taejun’s quirk is that he has the ability to see people's auras in the form of colours and that way he matches people by the compatibility from complimentary colours between two people’s auras. This is why he is the match maker of the sales department, because anyone who he consults ends up married happily with their partner. The only thing taejun can’t see is his own aura which made him feel like he will be forever alone, Until the new employee Hongyeon showed up and started a conversation with taejun at a drinking party. There was a slight issue though...taejun also has this uncanny ability to kiss anyone who is in close proximity to him when he drinks, and hongyeon was told to sit next to him by his supervisor, basically they wanted to sacrifice him.lol.

But this development made hongyeon very happy and they kissed and did other things after wards. Taejun didn’t really notice it when he was drunk but took notice that hongyeon had a rainbow like aura emitting from him. Which he had never seen before.

I find it really cute to see people’s auras but not your own, which means nothing can be predicted in terms of who you end up with, but why was he able to see hongyeon with a rainbow aura?

Makes me think that is an indication that he is the “one” for him. This concept is really cute and the relationship between hongyeon and taejun started off really romantic for just having a first encounter, after things progressed they started to catch feelings for each other.

This manhwa is still ongoing so I’m not sure how and when it will end, but really liking it so far, even with the crazy amount of sex scenes, I can still feel the intimacy between to two characters and it’s not just showing sex for the sake of it. This is a really cute story so please read it if you are curious!

Pearl Boy:

“ Do shik is a host who ran away with a large sum of money and has a bunch of people chasing him down, he fled to the country side to lay low for a while and noticed that he was essentially running out of funds to survive. He tried to pick up a few men in hopes of getting some money for his services, but none have been taking the bait. He noticed a clam grilling restaurant and thought he would try his luck in getting a free meal, the boss of the restaurant over heard doshik’s plans and told his worker to pay attention to him in case he runs away. the restaurant’s worker jin juha was aware of his schemes and stopped him from eating and running at the very last minute, saying that he should make it up by paying with his “ body” doshik thought that meant sexual favors and began to touch juha inappropriately. Before juha says that wasn’t what he meant, there was a bunch of men coming towards the restaurant, which made juha panic and forced doshik to leave and forget about paying. After doshik left he was loitering around the restaurant and noticed the back alley had an entry way to the back of the restaurant, there he saw something that he should not have seen.....”

Shameless plug before we begin here, I did draw a fanart of juha from pearl boy if you would like to see it please do so, I explained in the summary that I would write my own synopsis since the one i found was really bad.lol.

I wrote a little summary of the plot up till now below:

so it goes Boss  sexual abuse juha by making him work as a sex toy for old ugly bastards -> juha has ability to produce pearls from cuming after sex lol. i’m sorry this seems so absurd, but it is how the story goes, which the boss monopolizes him -> juha can’t run away because he is scared and owes boss money  juha was about to be assaulted by the ugly bastards-> doshik shows up and saves him a couple times and ends up working at the shop as a co worker-> juha and doshik get to know each other after doshik saves him a couple times juha asks doshik to have sex with him ( in order to produce pearls for debt payment) -> doshik discovers juha’s ability but thought it was beads coming out of his body...LOL. he actually thought he had kidney stones and was genuinely concerned ->  doshik had a pearl that he found at the beach earlier on and used it to compare to the bead that came out of juha and found out it as an actual pearl after getting it appraised by the bank person ->juha met up with doshik and wanted to tell him he wanted him to come over again cause he liked doing it with him -> juha and boss confront each other and boss is angry he didn't show up meet his business partners that night that juha and doshik were together -> juha says that he’s only going to pay it off by himself with his one partner, he didn't tell boss it was doshik, but i think he found out later -> juha and doshik became roommates ->Boss goes to doshik’s old work place to find out more about him

And that is the summary until the official licensed chapters, so I have a lot to say about this manhwa, since this one has been on my mind for a while, but juha’s “quirk” is to make pearls by cuming after sex.lol. Firstly that must hurt, it really would feel like having kidney stones wouldn’t it? It sounds so absurd to say “my ability is to cum pearls” although it’s quite unique, not really sure if you’d save any one with that power.

So the reason why I couldn’t tell if this manhwa is satirical or serious because the whole plot started off with juha being used as a sex toy for crusty old men, these people were getting paid by the boss to basically have sex with juha in order for him to produce pearls, it’s sounds so far-fetched when you explain this to someone, it sounds like some hentai plot line with ugly ass b*stards...but it’s not just one, it’s like 10 of them...so imagine the ugliest being you’ve ever seen in anime/manga but x10...

That freaken boss, I get that some of you would see him and simp over him cause he looks hot but he’s a terrible person, looks can’t begin to compromise for his actions, he’s involved with sex trafficking and sexual abuse, that alone is enough for me to hate this person. So just keep that in mind if you decided to read this.

That aside, he complains and hurts juha because he does not produce quality pearls after having sex with all those men...and i’m like can you blame him? Satirical point of view speaking, you only gave him crusty old ugly ass men to work with, i’m surprised he produced any at all, if you want quality then get better looking men, look at how much he made with doshik...doesn’t that tell you anything?...ugh. the idiocy...

Speaking of doshik, I really like his ballsy character, when one of the crusty ass men was assaulting juha he literally grabbed the ugly ass’s balls and says he will take care of it for him, since he’s good at this stuff. Lol. He is an awesome character and he cares so much for juha, even in the beginning when they were not close and always ended up arguing, he would be genuinely worried for him. Fast forward when juha and doshik were getting close and juha wanted to have sex with doshik instead of the dudes he was supposed to meet that night, doshik really showed how much he liked him and handled him gently and sweetly, I honestly blush every time they have any sort of intimacy, I could feel their affection projecting off of my screen, it’s really sweet. If you can’t tell I simp so hard for this couple and will probably continue to do so. You’ll need to read the manhwa to know what I’m saying but their love scenes are really passionate and affectionate. This of course makes me believe that juha was a person who only knew what pain and suffering was due to his situation and that led to his cold and indifferent expressions early in the manhwa, but after meeting doshik his expressions begin to soften and you can tell as a reader that he starting to develop feelings for doshik. The author actually drew an illustration on her twitter that was quite symbolic to the recent chapters and where the story was going, and I decided to write an entire tumblr post, breaking down the symbolism and foreshadowing in her art. If you’d like to read that post I’ll link it down below.

This manhwa is fairly new and currently is still ongoing so there is very much a lot of stuff to unravel as it continues down the line. Please read this if you have not you won’t be disappointed, I thought this was going to be some satire bull shit and I was proven so wrong... lol.

Alright, that is it for the manga and webtoons section this week, we ended off with the theme of “quirks” in time for spring when My hero academia season 5 will be starting again in the spring.

I hope you all are enjoying reading this since I don’t have any feed back after doing this every month. I do enjoy sharing these since not many people talk about manga/webtoons and I feel like this topic should be more popular. Like I said in the beginning please let me know if you’d like to see the titles of manhwa that I dropped and why I dropped it, in case there are some you are not sure whether or not to read it and would like some feedback, I don’t beat around the bush when I don’t like something so you can be sure that my opinions are 100% genuine.

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ANIME

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Kemono Jihen:

“When a series of animal bodies that rot away after a single night begin appearing in a remote mountain village, Inugami, a detective from Tokyo who specializes in the occult, is called to investigate.

While working the case, he befriends a strange boy who works in the field every day instead of going to school. Shunned by his peers and nicknamed "Dorota-bou" after a yokai that lives in the mud, he helps Inugami uncover the truth behind the killings but supernatural forces are at work, and while Dorota-bou is just a nickname, it might not be the only thing about the boy that isn't human.”

- Summary from my anime list

I started watching this because it reminded me of old series like inuyasha, and I thought I would try it out. I think it’s interesting so far, half demons living among-st the humans and a group of them are solving cases together, this is only my understanding so far. I think that main character is in need of some development because I can’t really read his expressions very well so he doesn’t have much of a personality. I’m not really getting the whole plot as of yet, but maybe when this show is over I’ll have a better understanding.

I’m not going to lie, there is nothing that is intriguing me in terms of new anime series, I have watched the same ones I talked about last month, plus this one. I am waiting for attack on titan to finish before watching it all at once. I don’t think waiting every week for a new episode is something I can do for this series.

I am also waiting for shaman king to show in the spring, I loved shaman king when I was younger and I really want to revisit this series since it was one of my favorites. Also my hero academia season 5 is in the spring as well, so looking forward to seeing that.

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MUSIC/PODCASTS:

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Music for this month is mainly a playlist called dandelions playlist, this YouTube channel has a plethora of indie k-pop music and I love listening to this while painting and drawing, it really relaxes the mind.

I did say in the last months’ favorites that would maybe include some podcasts that I have been listening to and it’s also on YouTube as well

This one is not a podcast, but she may as well have one since she has really interesting takes on bad movies, her channel name is KennieJD, and she talks about bad movies in her series called “bad movies in a beat” I watched a lot of them and I really like the one she did on the “death note” live action movie, this is why I avoided watching that movie, being a huge fan of death note back in the day. All the things she said in her video are valid and I whole heartedly agree with all of it.

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So you have reached the end! Congrats!

I hope everything was informative and if you decided to read/watch any of the things mentioned in my favorites for this month, please let me know down below what you thought about it,

I also am doing a draw 6 characters challenge so if you’d like to participate please see that post on my tumblr page for details!

With that being said, please take care of your selves, we are still in the mist of this pandemic and I hope you are all well and taking care of your selves and your loved ones.

I’ll see you in the next monthly favorites.Thank you for reading,

Sheena

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SOCIAL MEDIA

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Instagram: shinb_art

Tumblr: shinahbee

Deviantart: she-be.deviantart.com

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