#i was about to go back to bed because i didnt sleep last night but now im a bit worried

[ghosts-lot]

i just lived through the scariest moment of my life i feel like im going to go completely bald from the stress in the next hour or so

[chososlilprincess]

okay last LAST part of Virgin!Choso…part 4<3 (i will probably do scenarios w Choso as a virgin in the future tho but this is the end of this lil series) other parts here: part 1. part 2. part 3.

alright….rly hope u guys like it!!<33

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Virgin Choso, who wakes up in the morning, blinking his eyes, trying to get used to the sunlight coming in through the blinds.

You’re laying on his chest, your arms hugging him close, breathing softly. You’d fallen asleep quickly last night, fucked out from him eating you out. He smiles at the memory of you kissing him, and how you’d said yes to being his perfect little girlfriend. He starts rubbing your back, kissing your forehead softly before moving you, he’d needed to go to the bathroom for 30 minutes now, holding it in because he didnt want to wake you, he wanted to stay with you on his chest forever.

When he leaves his bathroom he stands in his boxers and a white t-shirt outside of his bedroom, he needs a cigarette, and he wants to let his princess sleep.

He goes to his balcony and pulls out a cig from the pack, putting it between his lips and lighting it. He’s really happy he realizes, and his heart is at ease, even though it’s still burning up from how much he loves the girl sleeping in his bed.

A minute later he hears the door to his bedroom open, and the pats of your feet on the floor, walking to him. You wrap your arms around his middle, nuzzling your face into his back.

Fuck. calm yourself Choso.

“come back to bed please,” you tell him in a small voice, hugging him closer.

His heart clenches, “of course,” he says, he could never deny you anything, And he takes your hand as you lead him back to his bed.

“Wanna show you how much i like you,” you say as you place urself in his lap, straddling him on his bed. You feel him twitching in his boxers. And when he looks at you again, his eyes are full of desperation.

“been wanting you,” he breathes out “so much and i…” he pulls you closer by your waist, wrapping his arms around you. “i touched myself…every night, thinking about your pretty face and…” he’s embarrassed to admit it and his cheeks flush.

“it’s okay…i did it too choso..” you say softly and caress his cheek.

you touched yourself thinking about him. fuck that did it for him.

“wanna be inside you…please i,” he buries his face in your neck, bucking his hips and you feel how hard he is. You’re driving him insane, sitting on his lap so pretty, with only your top and panties on. He wants to show you he’s yours, he wants you to tell him youre his.

“shhh i want you too…” you tell him and he nods,

You kiss him then, giving him little pecks around his mouth. And when you put your hand on his cock, he whines and grinds himself into you.

“wanna touch it…can i?” you say innocently and trace a finger up his cock, all the way to the tip. He whimpers, “please,” and rubs his head on your cheek.

As soon as you get his consent you put your hand down his boxers, pulling out his dick. Its so pretty. Long and thick, the tip leaking and red. And you eye the happy trail from his groin all the way to his belly button.

“look…my hand almost doesn’t fit around it…so big…” you say fascinated, studying his dick. He groans deeply, holding onto your waist. “baby i…” he’ll cum if you say shit like that, while looking so perfect on top of him.

You stroke him once slowly and he kisses you again, groaning into your mouth. it feels so good, so much better than when he’s doing it himself. He bucks up into your hand, fucking himself into it. He’s panting softly, and when you pull away his eyes are half lidded, he looks fucked out already.

“cant wait anymore please fuck,” he almost looks like hes gonna cry, looking down at your hand stroking him, “let me be inside you princess please,” he begs.

You take your hand away from his dick, and he sobs at the lack of contact. “tell me,” you say, and he knows what you mean.

“loved you ever since you smiled at me for the first time, i think about you…f-fuck i think about you all the time,” his face turns into one full of affection, “ive never done this before,” He says, and doesnt tell you that not only is he a Virgin, but he also had no clue about sex before Yuji told him. Back then something in his human heart wanted you so bad, and now all of him does.

“ive never felt this before,” he sniffles, “fuck please princess i can’t take it anymore,” he’s shaking now, trembling from his desire.

“shhh…take your clothes off,” you tell him and he obeys you, pulling off his t-shirt to reveal his toned chest, his body full of scars. He pulls off his boxers and you pull off your panties.

“lay down,”

He gets on the bed, And you admire him for a moment. He’s completely naked, big chest and strong arms on full display. His hard cock leaking and stiff on his stomach.

When you get on top of him he mewls in anticipation. You put your hands on his chest, placing your pussy on his length.

He grabs your thighs tightly as he groans. Youre so wet, all for him. It makes his heart swell with pride.

You grab him and place him to your wet hole, putting his tip inside. And hes so big, your little pussy struggling to take even just his tip. You whine out and he stops you before you can sink down on him more. hes breathing heavily, cheeks a light pink, “dont wanna hurt you…” he breathes out.

“i…i can take it, just…give me a minute,” you say and bite your lip tightly. And youre so fucking adorable, how youre struggling to take his big cock, but you want to make him happy so bad, wanna have him inside you so bad.

When you finally sink down fully on him, you both moan in unison. And Choso groans at the way he can see himself poking through your tummy.

You look at him, silently asking for permission to keep going, he nods eagerly. You lift your hips and start fucking yourself on him slowly, letting out the prettiest sounds hes ever heard, It feels so fucking good. Your cunt is so wet and warm. He loves this, he loves you. He whimpers and cries while you bounce on him, moving his hands to your waist.

“you’re so handsome Choso,” you say it softly to him, clenching down on his length. You think hes handsome.

Choso looses his mind.

“fuck baby i’m sorry,” He grabs your hips and flip you over so that you’re laying on your back underneath him, he slides into you again, “need to…fuck i need you,” he whines and he ruts into you fast and desperate.

You’re moaning so pretty now. he keeps going.

“mine…mine mine mine mine,” he breathes.

You look up at him with your pretty big eyes, letting out the cutest sound hes ever heard. And with that he reaches his high.

“fuck i love you i love you i love you,” he repeats it over and over as he fills you up with his hot cum, trembling and crying from how good he feels, while you cum around him too from the feeling of him finishing inside you.

He passes out on top of you, breathing heavily, careful not to crush you under him. You reach up and stroke his hair, calming him as he comes down from his high. He nuzzles his cheek into you, kissing you softly as he pulls out of you with a whimper.

He lays down next to you and cradle you to his chest, wrapping his arms around you and kissing the top of your head.

“i love being your boyfriend,” he says,

and you laugh, your body vibrating against him.

he looks at you with a smile, “what? whats funny?”

you stop to look at him again, “nothing,” you crawl on top of him then, laying flat on his chest, folding your arms and putting your head on your hands.

“fuck youre pretty,” he breathes, and you kiss him softly.

“And youre handsome…or maybe i shouldnt say that because you might go beast mode again,” you grin at him,

“shut up…” he mumbles, and you laugh even harder. “its okay…i liked it,” you say,

“say that youre mine,” you look at him and his face is serious,

“im yours Choso…”

You both fall asleep to the sound of eachothers heartbeat.

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YIPPIEEE!! yeah i made reader say he went “beast mode” sue me. i was giggling bru😭😭 (she said it ironically dont worry)

taglist:

@adanfore @the1exiled @tojicvmslut @natriae @mynahx3 @arabellatreaty @himboelover @saturnlus-stuff @sircatchungus @ladygunheild @peregrine-nation @otomebebe @kyouenredxviolet @dellalyra @bloombb @mimiemie @sodoney

[veryberryjelly]

fidget

felix catton x fem!reader

cw : none, no mention of y/n.

𝐧𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

saltburn was your favourite place to be.

you had been spending your summers there since you were 14 and you met felix at school.

at 16 felix decided to kiss you by the lake and you had been inseparable since then.

even at oxford, it was very rare that you'd spend a night alone, either sleeping in felix's dorm or having him over at yours.

your summers at the house were always enjoyable, unless god forbid you fell unwell over the time you stayed there.

and unfortunately, that had happened this year.

you were curled up in your bed, curtains drawn as the burning sun heated up the entire room.

even with the warmth from the sun, the hot water bottle on your stomach and the duvet over your body, you were still shivering.

of course your period had to come on the hottest day of the year, when you would be constantly taking off your covers and putting them back on moments later.

your eyes were clenched shut as you willed yourself to fall asleep so you could wake up and be rid of your devilish cramps.

but of course, that was not what god had in store for you as your boyfriend burst into your room.

" mornin' sweetheart " he said, making his way over to your bed where he sat down , his hand lifting to brush some hair from your face. " what're you doing sleeping in here? i was waiting for you last night "

while you would normally relish in the feeling of felix playing with your hair, right now everything was sensitive and you couldnt take it.

" you were asleep when i came in, didnt want to wake you " you muttered, clearly lying through your teeth as you lifted your hand to move his off of your face, instead choosing to loop your little finger through his.

that was about much touch as you could handle at the moment.

felix was not having that as the reason. you knew he didnt care if you woke him up, as long as he woke up to you in his arms. it was then that he noticed the furrow in your brow and the lick of sweat over your forehead.

" what's up, sweetness? you dont look so good " he said, shifting a little closer to you, his leg lifting up onto the bed so you couldnt avoid this conversation.

you were hesitant, never having discussed this with felix before as there wasnt ever a need to, but the soft movement of him sliding his hand into your practically made you melt.

" i got my period last night, didnt want to stain your sheets or keep you up with my fidgeting " whenever you got cramps it was impossible to get comfortable. no position was good enough to ease the storm in your uterus.

" so you deprived me of your cuddles last night because you didnt want to ruin my sheets? " he asked, his brow raising incredulously.

" didn't think you'd want to deal with my fidgeting either. " you admitted, clutching your hot water bottle a little tighter.

" oh, baby, i don't care. i want to be there for you when you're not feeling good. " he explained, shifting on the bed again so he was sat up agains the headboard. " now because you robbed me of your company last night, you have no choice in letting me take care of you now. " he said with a soft smile.

" you don't have to do that, lex- "

you were swiftly cut off by felix " i dont have to, but i want to. i'm going to get you something to drink, then how would you feel about a bath ?"

you had to admit that sounded amazing, being engulfed in warm water for a little while.

" that sounds really nice " you agreed, lifting your head slightly to rest against his leg, still clad in his pyjama pants. " but dont leave yet "

your final word caused a soft laugh to come from his lips, his hand lifting to rest on your back, the other still clutched in yours.

" okay, we can stay here a while "

[skullvgirl]

needy!nagi ིྀ | headcannons

incl. nagichi ≧▽≦

warnings: school!au, suggestive, fem reader, fluff ooc ( ? )

an's: idrk if this follows the theme of [ ooc trait x character ] yall, nagi is kinda need no?

needy!nagi who follows you around, everyyyywhere, like theres an invisible leash attached to your hand and his neck, you literally had to force him too leave when he tried following you into the bathroom

needy!nagi who calls for you to do even the littlest things, because somehow you 'do it better' or 'make it look easier'

needy!nagi who forgets all rules physical boundaries when he's near you, who has to hold you always and for as long as possible

needy!nagi who makes the biggest fuss when you have to leave the house without him. even if it's just a 5 minute outting from your house to the store he acts like your moving half way across the world { but you are he'd say }

needynagi who texts you all the time, 24/7 365 days a year is always blowing up your phone asking you and talking about the most redicoulus things

"did you tie your shoes before you went out ?"

"did you make sure too look both ways when crossing the street?"

and don't even get me started on when he's needy, needy

an obnoxious and repetitive beeping sounds on your alarm and you groan, twisting your body uncomfortably in the shared bed sheets before finally turning it off.

"seriously morning already..." you mumbled quietly, the darkness shrouding your thoughts.

i need to get ready for school.

and you did just that. at least you were going to before you realized there was another person in your bed, someone who felt very familiar.

oh no...

"nagi ???" you whisper-yelled it, patting his face lightly and turning the lamp on to get a clear veiw of your boyfriend.

"nagi wake up, your not supposed to be here" you sat up and began shakimg him this time.

nagi only groaned and wrapped his arms around his arms around your waist, nuzzling into the side of your thigh. "shhh, m' tryna sleep"

you shook your head and attempted to unwrap his hands from your body, with much struggle, he was surprising strong for being half asleep.

"nagi stop, nagi it's monday—a school day, you were supposed to be gone last night, why didn't your parents pick you up?"

"didnt tell them too"

"didnt tell them too...whadday mean didn't tell them too—im gonna get in trouble—wait a minute, nagi you didn't..."

"didnt what" his voice unmuffled as he moved his head to rest on your lap, his eyes staring directly at your own.

"you didnt lie to your parents and say you could stay for the whole week...did you?" you cupped his cheeks, studying his expression.

he didn't answer, "kiss me"

"nagi now is not the time—"

"kiss me pretty, please?"

you stared at him for a moment before leaning down, softly pressing your lips on his.

"good now?"

he looked dazed, and he was quiet so long you'd thought he didn't hear you. "almost"

your hands which had previously been rubbing soothing strokes across his face were quickly held behind your back.

he kissed your belly softly, relentlessly pressing butterflies into your body. "nagi that tickles" you giggled, trying to break free from his grasp.

"really? does it?" he murmured, rubbing his nose in the crevasse of your thigh.

"it does, now let go we have to get ready for school before my parents wake up"

he continued nuzzling your body however, then began slowly pushing his other hand against your chest to lean you back.

"i can make you feel alot more than tickling if you let me"

your cheeks felt hot. jeez, what has gotten into him !

"mmh, tempting but we cant and you know that—look it's already 6:09 we gotta g—OH!"

your stentence was cut off by the sensation of nagi feeling you through your shorts. his hands releasing your wrists long ago, he was now tugging at your pj's in hot desperation, probing his nose against your—

"nagi! what are you doing! school remember? we have to be there at 7"

"but do we reallyyyy..." nagi groaned, the vibrations sending shudders up your spine.

"y-yes, really, we have to be there, my parents own this house remember? not me"

"fine, but ill only go under one condition"

you sighed in preparation, for whatever rediculous reason was coming your way.

"and that is?"

"i get to stay over for the rest of the week AND, you sit on this right here..." he pointed too his mouth, and you squeezed your thighs together at the proposition.

"nagi, staying over defeats the purpose of you leaving, a-and i dont think that second option would be good for us either..."

"you wanna test to see?"

"i-i,—test and see what?"

"how bad our second option would be"

"..." he began moving in your silence, flipping your legs over his shoulders and kissing your belly once again.

"i'll take that as a yes"

an's: nagi is needy but somehow this still came out ooc, ( do i consider that a win or what...? )

[azrielsdove]

I literally had a dream about this last night and I had to get it out. 😬

Could I request Azriel x Rhysands sister Reader. Where her and Az have a one night stand and Reader becomes pregnant but she glamours her scent and goes to a healer for a tonic to get rid of it. She doesnt tell Azriel or Rhys because shes young and barely become of age for a fae, shes a princess and couldnt bring a bastard child into the high court and also Rhys would freak the fuck out and probably ban them both. Azriel somehow finds out finds out and that she wants to get rid of it and he begs and grovels for her to keep the babe but shes so so conflicted. Angst with whatever ending you'd like.

Side note: In my dream I don't know how it ended just that Rhys was newly appointed high lord and was under so much stress and was suuuper strict. And thats why I didnt tell him. I remember azriel stopping me outside of the healers and he just knew. Like serious spymaster look hovering above me cuz I was so much shorter than him and he was holding my arms telling me to keep it. 😩😩😩 I wish i would have remembered the baby making process tho. 🤣🤣🤣

Baby, My Baby: Azriel x Reader

Warnings: Smut, angst, pregnancy + abortion talk, 18+

***

Your back slammed against the wall outside Rita’s, Azriel’s lips harsh against yours. You gripped onto his shirt, pulling him impossibly closer. His fingers dug into your hips, groaning into the kiss. Everything about this was wrong, and you were both dead if Rhysand saw.

You couldn’t bring yourself to care as the Shadowsinger ground down against you. You gasped against his lips, pushing back against him. “Az,” you murmured, breaking the kiss just slightly. “Let’s go.” He nodded, wrapping you in his arms as he shot off to the sky.

He flew you to the House of Wind, your lips kissing his neck and face wherever you could reach. You let your fingers trail his wings, shivering at the noise that pulled from him. “If you don’t stop that, we will never make it there.” He growled, voice hot. You smirked against his skin, letting your fingers trail the delicate leather one more time.

Azriel landed you on the balcony outside of his room, lips immediately connecting to yours while he pushed you backwards through the doors. The tension between the two of you had finally snapped when you both had one too many shots that night. Your brother forbade you from laying with anyone, having given you a dreadfully long speech the night you turned of age. He warned you of the dangers of trusting males with your body, that it wasn’t appropriate for the princess of the Night Court to sleep around.

All his concerns were gone from your mind as Azriels fingers slid up your skirt. You arched into the touch, this feeling new and unfamiliar. He groaned into your mouth at your body’s reaction to him, tugging your dress and underwear off. He pulled away, gazing at your now exposed body. You felt self conscious for half a second, until he looked up at you with desire filled eyes.

“Can I taste?” He asked, pushing you onto the edge of his bed and kneeling between your legs. You nodded, not trusting your voice to work right then. Azriel gave you a wicked smile, head ducking down. Your back arched against the bed at the first swipe of his tongue, hands tangling in his hair. He gripped onto your thighs, pulling them over his shoulders. His tongue worked expertly, licking and sucking you in a way that made you cry out with pleasure. He dragged one hand up to your stomach, pressing you flat onto the bed. You moaned loudly, the force of him keeping you still increasing the sensations he was giving you.

Your thighs squeezed around his head, gasps and moans falling from you as he worked you. He brought his other hand up, sliding one finger inside. You bit your lip at the unfamiliar intrusion, mind going blank when his finger curled in the most delicious way. “Mmm, you are tight.” He growled against you, pushing another finger in. You gave a squeak at the two large fingers inside, prepping you to take him fully. You felt the coil in your stomach threatening to snap, your hands holding onto Azriels hair like a lifeline. He sucked sharply, fingers doing that perfect curl inside of you, blinding white taking over your vision. You pushed against him, mouth open in a silent scream as the unmistakable pleasure wiped over you. Azriel pushed you through it, prolonging the feeling until you were shaking.

He pulled away, kissing up your body as he made his way back to your lips. You grabbed onto his back, kissing him as hard as you could. You tasted yourself on his lips, his tongue, the fire reigniting in your stomach. “Are you ready for me?” He asked, sliding his pants off. You looked down, mouth dropping a little at the size of him. Was he even going to fit?

Azriel chuckled darkly, titling your head back up to look at him. “It will fit.” He promised, leaning back to kiss you as he ran himself through the wetness between your legs. You groaned when he pushed the first inch in, the feeling new to your body. He went slowly, moving inch by inch. Pain erupted through you, quickly turning to pleasure the deeper he went. When he finally bottomed out, you swore you could feel him in your stomach. He breathed heavy against you, breaking away from your kiss to rest his forehead on yours. “Tell me when.” He whispered, allowing you time to adjust to the size of him.

“Please”, you breathed out, “Azriel, please, move.” He didn’t need to be told twice, pulling nearly all the way out before thrusting his way in again. You screamed his name, nails digging into his skin. He started kissing and sucking on your neck, the feeling of his mouth and his cock overwhelming you. You moaned his name over and over, the only word you knew at the moment.

“Fuck,” Azriel groaned, feeling you around him. “Princess, fuck. You feel even better than I imagined.” He accompanied his words with a bite to your shoulder, a whine escaping your lips. He fucked into you over and over, having you on the edge again in no time.

“Az,” you moaned, “Az! I’m gonna-“ You didn’t even finish the sentence before release poured over you, certain you were drawing blood with the force of your nails on his back. He roared as he came right behind you, the pleasure of you squeezing around him too much for him to bear. He spilled into you, rope after rope of thick cum coating your walls. He stilled his movements, the two of you breathing hard against each other.

He slowly pulled out, rolling to lay next to you. Azriel wrapped his arms around you, pulling you comfortingly into his chest. “You were amazing.” He whispered into your hair, smiling at your already sleeping form, fucked out.

He chose to ignore the thought of what Rhysand would do if he ever found out what happened.

***

It was a few weeks after when you woke up one morning, body sore. You weren’t sure why, you had been too tired to even go to training the day before. You stretched, deciding to go down and get some tea to soothe your muscles. You were waiting for the water to boil when Cassian came in behind you. “Good Mor-“ He started, stopping abruptly. You turned to him, lifting an eyebrow in confusion. He was staring at you wide-eyed, mouth open in shock.

“Cass?” You asked, confusion turning into concern as he just stood there. “Are you okay?”

He blinked, snapping out of his frozen state. “Am I okay? Are you okay? Does Rhys know? Whose is it?” The questions tumbled out of him, each one confusing you more and more. You held your hand up, signaling him to stop.

“I’m sorry, what are you talking about?” You asked, cocking your head to the side. Cassian’s eyes got even wider, realizing you yourself didn’t know yet.

“Oh.” He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, shifting on his feet. He did not want to be the one to deliver this news to you. “Uh, you know. The baby?”

The baby? What was he talking about, ‘the baby’? You stared blankly at him, not sure what to say. “What do you mean,” you started slowly, “the baby?”

Cassian looked like he wanted to melt into the floor. “Your baby. The one inside you.” His words were quiet, cautious.

You laughed.

“Impossible, Cass. There’s no way i’m pregnant, i’m-“ You cut yourself off, heart racing. You weren’t a virgin, not anymore. You thought back to that night, remembering Azriel finishing inside you. Realizing you have never taken the contraceptive tea, a request like that would have guaranteed your brothers meddling. You foolishly believed it wouldn’t happen, it is so difficult for fae to conceive. How could you lose your virginity and fall pregnant all in one night?

You heard the unmistakable sound of your brother and Azriel talking, heading to the kitchen. You looked in panic at Cassian, glamouring your scent as quickly as possible. “Can you still smell it?” You asked quietly, breathing a little easier when he shook his head. You turned back to your now boiling water, filling your teacup as though everything was normal.

“Good morning sister! Cass!” Rhys exclaimed, walking into the room. Thanking the Mother, Cassian had managed to sit down and fill his plate with random food before they came in. Hiding the tense conversation the two of you just had. You turned to face them, sipping your tea nonchalantly.

“Brother. Az.” You greeted, acting like nothing was wrong. Like you didn’t just have the biggest bomb of your life dropped on you. Rhys came to give you a hug, your body tensing as if he would be able to feel that there were now two heartbeats inside of you. He pulled back, resting his hands on your arms as he looked into your eyes.

“Are you alright?” He asked, worry written on his face. You have him a small smile, sipping your tea.

“Yes, just tired. I think i’m coming down with something.” You responded, throwing in a little cough at the end. “I’m just going to go lie back down, i’m sure some rest will help.” You smiled at your brother, turning to leave the kitchen.

The Shadowsingers eyes were burning into your retreating form.

***

You paced your room, every inch of you panicking. Should you tell Rhys? Should you tell Azriel? No. You shouldn’t tell either of them. Azriel will probably be ashamed of you, not wanting to claim your child as his. You’ll be forced to bring a bastard into this world, into the Night Court. And Rhys, oh he would kill you. No, he would kill Az. And then he would kill you. He’d make you and your bastard child leave the Court, not allowing that kind of shame to be brought on his family.

No, you decided. You had to get rid of it. Rhysand would never recover from the mess of it all. His barely of age sister, knocked up by his best friend. He was too new at being High Lord, the last thing he needed was something as complicated as this weighing him down. You fell into a fitful sleep, knowing what you would be forced to do the next day.

***

“Cass?” You called, knocking on his door early the next morning. Your brother kept you in the House of Wind, ensuring you would have to ask before you went to and from. You were not gifted with the Illyrian wings of your mother, and you did not care to trek 10,000 steps down to get where you needed to go.

Cassian opened his door, rubbing sleep from his eyes. “What is it?” He asked, looking down at you. You wrapped your arms around yourself, suddenly self conscious.

“I need you to take me down to the city.” You spoke quietly, the words harder to say than they were to think. “I’m getting rid of it.”

Cass stilled, staring at you for a long moment. Finally he nodded, turning back to get dressed. He lead you out to the balcony, folding you into his arms before taking off. It was a wordless flight, neither of you knowing what to say. He flew you all the way to the healer on the edge of Velaris, knowing it would offer you the most privacy.

You thanked him when he landed, turning to go into the small building. Cass stopped you, a hand on your arm. “Are you sure?” He asked, conflict in his eyes.

You nodded, giving a sad smile. “Rhys doesn’t need this stress. His unwed, young sister bringing a bastard into his court? And Az-“ You stopped yourself, feeling Cassians hand tighten on your arm in shock. You looked at him wide-eyed, realizing what you had confessed. “Do not tell him Cass. Please, please. He doesn’t need to deal with this either.” You begged, eyes filling with tears. He slowly nodded, releasing your arm.

“Okay.” He said finally, looking over you one last time. “I’ll stay in the area, watching for when you’re ready to go back.” You smiled gratefully, watching as he flew back up into the sky.

You turned to the building in front of you, suddenly feeling nauseous. Maybe you should just run away, run to a different court and hide. You don’t know how long you stood there, lost in your thoughts. The sun rose higher in the sky, signaling the time that had passed. You took a deep breath, whispering “It’s for the best” as you took a step forward to open the door.

“Stop!” You heard the panting cry from above you, and then a thud behind you. You whipped around, shocked to see Azriel standing there. “Stop.” He said again, quieter. He took a hesitant step towards you, looking like he wanted to grab you and take you away. You couldn’t say anything, mind blank as you looked at him. “Cass told me. He is scared for you.” He explained, hands fidgeting at his sides.

A flash of anger goes through you, he promised not to tell. “Go home, Az.” You said, voice clipped. “You don’t need to deal with this.” You ignored the pain on his face as you turned back to the door.

“No!” He grabbed your arm, pulling you away from the building. “No.” He said softer, making you look at him. “You don’t have to do this alone.”

You ripped your arm out of his grasp, frustrated and embarrassed at the whole situation. “Do not pretend you want a child, Az. Especially a child with me. You’ve barely talked to me since that night, and now suddenly you think you have a right to my choice?” It wasn’t so much anger at him that was coming out of you, more an anger at everything.

He looked like you had slapped him across the face, hands falling to his sides. “I thought you didn’t want anything to do with me.” He said softly, eyes on the ground.

“What are you talking about?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest.

“The next morning, when I woke up, you were gone. I thought maybe you weren’t sure if I was okay with you staying there, so I went to find you. I wanted to let you know that it was more than a fling. That I needed it to be more than a fling. When I found you in the kitchen, you smiled and said good morning like nothing had happened. I assumed you weren’t interested in more than that.”

Silence.

“You are a fucking idiot.” You said, rolling your eyes.

“What?” He asked, looking back up at you.

“I acted like everything was normal because I assumed that’s what you wanted. I’m your best friends younger sister, can you imagine the trouble you would get in with Rhys if he knew?”

“I imagine the trouble i’d get in with him is tenfold now.”

“Go home, Az.” You demanded again, staring him down. He took a step closer to you.

“No.” He said, reaching out to grab onto your arms. “Whatever choice you make, it is yours. I will respect what you decide, and I will never bring it back up if you wish. But please, know you are not alone. I want to be by your side, baby or not. My best friends sister or not.” You were taken aback by the honesty in his eyes, the tears begging to fall there.

You swallowed thickly, voice quiet when you spoke. “I want to be by your side too, no matter what.” He gave a soft smile, wrapping his arms around you. You stood in his embrace for a few, debating the choice you were going to make. You finally pulled away from him, sliding your hand into his. You took a deep breath, turning to walk into the healers office with Azriel next to you.

***

“You WHAT?!” You hear your brothers roar, sighing as the House began to shake with fighting. You pulled yourself up, walking out to the training ring to see your brother and Azriel. You leaned against the wall, arms crossed in front of you. Cass came up beside you, watching as well.

“I take it he told him?”

You nodded.

“Guess it didn’t go well.”

You shrugged. “He isn’t dead, so.”

Cassian laughed, agreeing with you.

The two of you watched as they fought, Rhys yelling countless insults to Azriel. Really, it was less of a fight and more of Az letting Rhys get his anger out, deflecting enough to escape serious injury or death. “You dirty, disgusting pig! My sister?! You’ve chosen to be with my sister?!” He throws another punch at Az, deflecting it with a glance at you.

You and Azriel had grown closer since that day at the healers. He was so gentle with you in the few days after, caring for you and treating you like a delicate piece of art. You didn’t stand for that for very long, desperate to get back to training. He allowed, modifying it at first so you wouldn’t overwhelm yourself.

Rhys and Az fought for a good while, Rhys finally winding down. He was breathing hard, looking between you and his friend. “Fine,” he said, crossing his arms. “I can be happy for you, or whatever.” He didn’t sound very happy, but there was a light in his eyes that wasn’t there before. Azriel sighed in relief at the fighting being over, a wicked smile coming across your face.

“Brother dear,” you called, directing the attention over to you. Azriel sensed what you were about to do, shaking his head vigorously behind Rhysands back. You waved your hand, allowing the glamour you’d kept up for the past seven months to fall away. “How does ‘Uncle’ sound?” You watched your brother take in your smell, the rounded belly your hands now rested on. His face reddened, anger coming back in full force as he whirled onto Az.

“YOU GOT HER PREGNANT?!”

***

Extra:

Rhys held the tiny girl close, letting her little hand hold his finger. He cooed and awed at her, already willing to do anything to make her happy. Azriel smiled at you, holding your tired body close to him. Your labor had been long, but without incident. By some stroke of luck, the healers discovered you had the Illyrian anatomy of your mother, just without the wings. When you went into the building that day with Az, you asked for a pregnancy confirmation. The healer had been able to confirm one healthy child, a child that unmistakably had wings. Fear had overtaken Azriel in the few weeks after, constantly debating if he should tell Rhys. At your next appointment the healer did an internal check, delivering the news that all would be well.

You were thankful, laying in the arms of Azriel as you watched your brother hold your daughter. You were thankful Azriel stood by you as you decided to keep the baby, supporting you every step of the way. You even became thankful Cassian told him what you planned to do that day, even if the betrayal had stung for a while after. You were especially thankful Rhys didn’t murder Az when he found out you were pregnant. You looked up to the male next to you, a soft smile on your face.

All was well.

***

i LOVED this request!!!!! sometimes dreams are the best story inspo haha! also the “i wish i would have remembered the baby making process” SENT me lmao! i hope i did it justice for you 😉😅🫶🏻

[jadeylovesmarvelxo]

Alot of my high school experience was ruined because my life was rough, i have a request that maybe eddie knows reader didnt get to experience things she wanted to, sneaking around at school to make out, hiding hickeys, a guy sneaking through her window to take her on an adventure, being told in the middle of the night to meet them in the woods so they could fuck, was crying instead of getting fingered on prom night ect so he wants to make the reader feel special and plans all these exciting things for her and does it in a way that feels natural? (Lets be honest eddie doesnt have to be a teenager anymore, he'll crawl through your window regardless)

Request by anon

18+, mdni. Fluff.

❤️

Eddie had a plan. It involved you- his princess.

There was a list that he had made of all of the things you didn't experience in high school that he was determined for you to experience now.

You had confessed all of the things to him a few nights ago and he couldn't stop thinking about it. It kept niggling in his brain until he couldn't take it. He had to do something for you.

Most of your high school life was spent fighting interdimensional monsters with Steve and the rest of Hawkins heroes. No wonder you weren't able to have a normal high school experience.

There were also a few family troubles that caused you to be stressed throughout high school as well.

And so the list was born. Some things were easy, like sneaking around and making out. Granted it wasn't sneaking around and making out all over school like you wished to experience but it was something.

None of your friends knew that the two of you were together, the relationship had only come about after the upside down was finally destroyed and you and everyone else in Hawkins could have peace from all the spooky shit that had been happening the last few years.

❤️

The first experience on the list was just about to begin, Surprise you by climbing through your window and Take you on an adventure.

He was currently trying not to fall off your roof as he made his way to your window.

He smiles when he sees you reading on your bed and gently taps your window. You peer up and a smile caresses your face. "Eddie!" you rush over to open the window and he clambers inside.

"Sweet princess, will you join Eddie the brave on a new quest... a quest for adventure?" you giggle and nod looking delighted.

"Of course my knight" you take his hand and he gestures to the window. He was hinting for the two of you to make your exit out of the window. "Eddie, we can't. What if we fall?" he grins and kisses you.

"Come on sweetheart. This is an adventure after all" he's practically bouncing on the balls of his feet to get started and you couldn't help but feel endeared by his excitement.

"Okay, let's go" he grins and bows to you, then helps you climb out of the window and climb off the roof.

"Where are we going to go Ed's?" you're curious about where exactly the two of you could have an adventure when it was almost midnight.

"That's the point of an adventure sweetheart, we just see where the night takes us, now onwards" he holds your hand all the way as the two of you walk into the night.

...

It's maybe a few hours later when you sneak back into your room feeling flushed and giddy, you collapse on the bed and giggle at how amazing the night was.

You're so exhausted that you fall asleep instantly but not without one final thought that tonight was one of your wishes to experience. If you weren't so tired you would think your boyfriend was up to something using what you told him.

You dismiss the thought and succumb to sleep.

❤️

For the next few days Eddie ticked off a few more things on the list but tries to make it look like they are occurring in a natural way.

Giving you the best prom night- of course there wasn't another prom that you and him could go to but Eddie had talked Steve into throwing an impromptu prom themed party and everyone had to dress in formal wear, drink punch and dance to cheesy as fuck songs; that Eddie would only listen to for you.

To sober up he took you outside where the two of you danced under the stars and the glow of the moonlight.

"I love this. This is amazing Eddie" you murmur as you rest your head on his chest and sway to the music. He kisses your forehead and a Cheshire cat grin forms on his face.

"What do you say that I give you the proper prom experience sweetheart?" He waggles his eyebrows, you giggle and swat him playfully.

"Let's try and sneak past Steve" you whisper and he gapes, clutching his heart in mock horror.

"I feel like I'm a bad influence on you princess" he winks and then the two of you snuck upstairs to one of Steve's guest bedrooms and Eddie drove you wild with his fingers, you clenching so tightly around him that Eddie almost came himself. (The two of you didn't leave the bedroom that night)

Of course if he ended up crossing off another item on the list which was to have a little fun in the woods near Steve's house then that was no one's business but you and Eddie.

"What's that on your neck?" Steve asks as you and Eddie join the others for breakfast, pretending that you've both been fast asleep. Nancy and Robin exchanged knowing looks, Robin shaking her head in amusement as you try to unsuccessfully cover your hickey.

"What does it look like dingus, I know it's been a while since Brenda but you remember a hickey right?" she teases him and he rolls his eyes at her.

"Of course I do, I just didn't realise that her and Eddie were uh...together" he shrugs and Robin snorts.

"Steve, they've been together for three months" at learning this Steve makes a little oh face then goes back to making pancakes.

Nancy delicately pulls something out of your hair and holds out a bright orange leaf. "Busy this morning huh?" you exchange looks with Eddie and both of you erupt with laughter.

Eddie meanwhile is pleased as punch that he's managed to tick all of the things off the list. Maybe he should write a new one?

After all he's never had sex in a pool before and Harrington's one is just right outside...

🤭❤️❤️

[morgluvsconnie]

BOUND, c.springer

chap.7 | fighting, drinking, arguing, language | chap.6

"these was supposed to be yours yesterday but... you know how that went."

connie said, standing at your door with a bouquet of pink flowers and chocolates. you softly smiled and bit your lip, grabbing the big bouquet and chocolates from him. he then looked at your arm.

"these the same type of roses i tattooed on your arm that night."

you tilted your head. "thank you. really. this the second time you saw me lookin a mess though." you laughed a little.

referring to the bonnet you had on your head and the oversized t-shirt you had on. connie shook his head, "nah, you look good." he laughed. "them was for your birthday though... your third birthday present."

"you funny." you looked at the flowers before looking at him. "you heard from...?"

"he saw my message, he know wassup." connie waved the air before putting his hands back in his pockets. ever since he stayed at your house last night, he never got the feeling to stay away.

you had some kind of hold on him, and it was odd.

"but yeah..." he said after a small silence filled the space between the both of you. "if you feel good enough, eren havin a party at his house tonight. tryna see if you going." he looked at you.

you hummed. "ill let you know." you nodded.

"without my number?" connie frowned playfully. you rolled your eyes with a smile. "i guess you found a way." you mumbled, taking his phone and putting your number in it. "just text me and remind me about it tonight." you said, passing him his phone back.

"i gotchu." connie said, turning to leave. he paused in his steps and turned back around, looking at your lips.

you exhaled, walking closer to him and giving him a peck on the lips. "there." you said, softly pushing him out of your doorway and shutting it behind him.

you walked back towards your stairs and in your room, placing the flowers in an empty vase. "ill put water in you later." you mumbled, sitting on the end of your bed and checking your phone, which you hadn't checked all night.

you had calls and texts from sasha, her asking where you were and if you were getting "fucked."

"what?" you frowned.

"you got fucked last night, i already know. i told mikasa you were either at home slumped or getting fucked. and since you answered, i wanna know who it was, why, and how it was." she said on the other line, making you hum.

"i didnt get fucked by anybody last night." what a liar you are.

"yeah yeah, girl cut the bullshit. i wanna know every detail." she looked at the camera before looking back up and what seemed like her tv.

"okay ill tell you, but sasha dont make a big deal out of it 'cus it was literally nothing." liar.

"i literally wont, just tell me." sasha looked back at the camera.

"so i was with connie-"

"bingo! i just fucking knew it! yknow, i wondered why i couldn't find you and connie after i found ony and i suspected you two were somewhere, and he was beating them doonies down." sasha pointed at the camera, making you roll your eyes.

"alright, whatever. you goin to erens party tonight?" you rubbed your forehead and closed your eyes.

"yeah, and youre going too. you woke up so late, the parties already in three hours." sasha mumbled like it was nothing. "what?" you said in disbelief, looking at the time on your phone.

it was 5 oclock. you really did get put to sleep.

"okay sash, im finna take a shower, dont worry bout picking me up tonight, ill just drive myself. ion plan on gettin wasted no more." you explained, standing up and going towards your bathroom.

"okay girl, love you, bye." she said before quickly hanging up. you put your phone on the bathroom counter before turning your water on and taking a long, steamy, shower.

you really werent in the mood for another party, and you really didnt feel like going out tonight again.

your back was aching, your legs were on the verge of being sore, all because of connie. you didnt even stay out long enough last night to have sore legs from the club, so you knew he was the cause.

but parties were different from clubs. theres was more fighting, drinking, arguing, everything. especially drama.

as you redid your fresh face, applying light makeup, redoing your hair and curling it, and putting your outfit on, you checked the time once again. 7:43pm.

if anything you were gonna be late instead of early due to the sheer amount of people that would crowd the house, even minutes before the official party started.

you grabbed your things, heading out of your house. as you started your car, smacking your lips at the fact that it was cold outside, and you just mindlessly decided to wear a small skirt.

you pulled out of your driveway after starting your music, driving down your neighborhood, pulling your mirror down to make sure your hair looked at least decent after replacing some of the tracks. "damn connie." you shook your head, pushing your mirror back up.

your music got interrupted by a phone call, you glance at your phone, not even looking at the contact before hitting answer. "yeah?" you said, putting your phone in the cup holder.

"wassupppp."

you rolled your eyes, "yes im going connie." you said, taking a turn down erens neighborhood. "well you late." connie said boredly on the other end. "why you wearin that tiny ass skirt?"

you frowned, picking up your phone and looking, not even realizing you were on factime. "why you lookin?" you smiled, sitting your phone in your lap. connie clicked his tongue. "watch yo mouth." he said, walking through the party, at least that's what it looked like.

as you pulled up on the side of the road near erens house, you turned your car off and took your seatbelt off, looking at your phone as you got out of the car. "ima see you in here right?" you walked up to the house, already seeing people on the porch and on the side of the house.

"i hope not." connie mumbled, smiling to see if you found his joke funny.

you hung up.

"not in the mood." you mumbled, opening the door and letting yourself, trying to push past everyone and find where eren and the rest of them were.

"y/nnnn!" sasha jumped up, along with mikasa, hugging you. "i heard about you" mikasa whispered in your ear. you pulled away and frowned at sasha. "dont ask me bout shit else." you pointed at her.

"ight, ight, fuck the kumbaya. wassup y/n." ony dapped you up. "hey ony." you smiled. "damn we cant get no hey?" eren frowned, holding his arms out, referring to him and armin. "can you give me time to speak? hey armin." you waved at armin.

you sat down beside connie, who was looking around the party the whole time. you nudged him a little, the rest of the group babbling about random things.

"you remember what i said right?" you looked at him as he continued looking away.

"bout reiner? yeah, ian worried bout that no mo'." he shrugged, taking a sip from whatever was in his styrofoam cup. your eyes rested on him, you obviously not believing him. connie looked at you and shrugged again. "i swear im not gon touch him." he said, looking you in the eye.

you pursed your lips together before standing up. "sash, mika, come with me, im bouta go get a margarita." you said, making your way to the kitchen and opening the cooler. "girl, why connie lookin so tense?" mikasa frowned, grabbing one after you. you slowly shook your head, finally deciding to tell them about what happened.

"he mad about something that happened between me and reiner. he just got aggressive and grabbed my wrist. connie saw the bruise and i told him not to do nothing 'cus i don't want him to get involved, but he stubborn." you shook your head, taking a sip from your margarita.

mikasa and sasha frowned. "y/n, you wasn't thinking on tellin us about this?" mikasa looked at your wrist. the bruise only faded a little. you looked at the ceiling with a groan. "i don't wanna involve nobody." you mumbled.

you really didn't understand why they wanted to know. yeah, he did put his hands on you, and if anything, you should've told the whole group, knowing they'd jump his ass in a heartbeat.

but you were so damn scared of reiner, you didn't know what he'd do if he caught you by yourself.

"what the fuck he do that for?" sasha squinted. "he thought somethin' was going on between me and connie 'cus hes a fuckin idiot."

"oh yeah, connie needa whoop his ass." mikasa glanced back at where connie and everyone else was. "i know." your lips formed a line, your eyes roaming around the room.

speak of the devil.

they landed right on reiner, who was walking through the crowd. your eyes widened and they went straight to connie. "i know that aint the muh'fucka right there!" sasha pointed. "shit." your eyebrows furrowed.

mikasa looked at you, straight in the eyes.

"y/n. reiner put his hands on you. you don't have a choice but to let connie beat his ass."

you were hesitant.

if you did let that happen, that could mean reiner would target you the most. but if it didnt happen, youd have to hide whatever you and connie had going on.

you didn't wanna hide anything. no, you didn't have to hide anything. you're not a child, you do whatever you wanna do, you fight back whenever you wanna fight.

but seems like before you could even give connie the permission to do anything, he beat you to it. you heard screaming around the spot you'd just left. you, sasha, and mikasa running over and through the crowd to see what was happening.

to your surprise, not only connie was throwing punches, but ony, and eren too. armin recording everything while laughing. with your lips parted and your eyes widened, you walked over to the other side to get a better view of what was happening to reiner and stood there, staring down at him.

his nose leaking, and bruises forming around different parts of his face.

he was trying his best to fight back but getting jumped by three strong guys wasn't the easiest trap to get out of.

"you like puttin yo hands on females? you a bitch." connie said as everyone else got pulled off of him. "dumb ass nigga." ony mumbled, aggressively fixing his clothes as some of his other homeboys pulled him outside to calm down.

"you a whole weirdo ass bitch! jumping one person 'cus you cant fight for yo damn self!" you saw historia run up to reiner, rushing to help him up.

she was always the main problem in your relationship, but just like connie defended you, you were gonna defend him.

"he shoulda never put his damn hands on me, if you got a problem we can take this shit outside too, or nah?" you raised your eyebrows, taking your phone from the side of your skirt to give it to sasha or mikasa, somebody nearby.

you might've been scared of reiner, but you wasn't scared of no little ass girl, or no girl in general.

historia frowned at you before looking at reiner. "whoop her ass." reiner mumbled to historia. that was your cue.

"come on man, ion got no time to waste on yo ass. i can get this over with quick." you shook your head, rushing outside and to your car, grabbing sweatpants from your backseat and throwing them over your skirt.

as everyone had their phones out, you got in the middle of the circle, mikasa and sasha standing behind you to make sure ymir or annie didn't jump in. you pulled your sweatpants up, rolling them up as adrenaline rushed through your body.

as mikasa tied your hair up, she eyed the rest of historias friends. you had no idea where connie was, nor were you worried about it.

"come on y/n." eren mumbled, his hands on his knees as he leaned over, waiting for you and historia to get your round in.

as she stepped in the middle of the circle, her minions screaming for her and most people screaming for you. you posted up, getting your hands ready, as you both went in a circle waiting for someone to swing first, you wasted no time to start throwing straight punches, no hair pulling, no pulling in general.

"whoop her ass y/n, you know what to do! yeah!" sasha cheered you on over the amount of people yelling.

historia was throwing punches, deciding to grab your hair and hold your head down, you, automatically mirroring her actions and pulling her to the side of you, making her trip over her own feet, pulling you down with her.

when you opened your eyes, you saw blood leaking down her face, just like reiner. she tried to kick you off of her, as you felt somebody grab your shoulders, you got more pissed by the seconds.

"let my hair go dumb bitch!" you yelled, whoever was grabbing your shoulders let go and you felt people crowd more around you, the screaming getting louder.

"ight, come on, come on." connie mumbled, grabbing you by your waist, trying to pull you off of historia, someone doing the same to her. but you didn't let go, still swinging hard licks, hitting her in her head and forehead.

"let go, y/n come on." connie frowned, trying his best to pull you away, as he turned his back towards historia, you still had a good grip on her hair. finally deciding to let go, and bring a chunk of her hair with you, you frowned, trying to make your way out of connies arms while yelling violent nothings.

"that bitch know to never fuck wit' me, ion even know why she tried it! she should know bout me!" you yelled, getting dragged away. "shut up bitch, you mad cus reiner finally found the one!" you saw her yelling.

"bitch you wanted beef bout a nigga that be bussin nut and knots in yo mouth, shut up bitch!"

"hush, hush, hush, you drunk. come on." connie mumbled, dragging you towards your car, continuing to hold you. "all three of yall got it out, come on." connie put his hand over your mouth to make you shut up.

you frowned up at him before looking at the ground.

"you good, just calm down. ight? i gotchu." connie mumbled, glancing back at a pissed off eren, storming towards his house.

"he ain't gon hurt you no mo', ight? just get in the car and calm down." connie mumbled. "i wanna go back in the house, ian drunk yet." you muttered, looking back at the house.

"you tryna fight, so no. get in the car bruh." connie looked back again, seeing historias small group leave the house.

"im not gon do nothing to the bitch, ima let her be mad bout a nigga." you mumbled. "i just wanna get drunk." you muttered.

connie looked at you for a few seconds before sighing, slowly nodding. "ima stay for a few mo minutes, but im goin home soon. gotta calm myself down." he muttered, grabbing your hand and leading you back towards the house.

you huffed. "okay."

chap.8

[thelov3lybookworm]

Can I request a cardan x reader fic? Anything you want to write! Just gimmi my baby there isnt much of him on this app.🥺

Weeping heart

Summary: Y/n has seen cardan go through lovers like they're wrappers of chocolates. One in his hand before the previous is even in the dustbin.

Now he has found Jude, and she does not know what to do.

•○●⛦●○•

A/n: anon thank you so much for this request! i love you so much for this. It was such a good writing exercise honestly. This is mainly pining, maybe angst.

Also, this marks the beginning of me writing for characters outside of the acotar universe, so I'm very excited

also I didnt tag anyone because the general taglist i have was for acotar.

(i might be down to write a part 2 👀)

(not proofread)

Enjoy!

•○🌑○•

She bit her lip as she stared up at her best friend, trying to contain the smile that threatened to overtake her features.

"Let me see that smile, beautiful." He grinned lazily at her, his dark eyes twinkling under the rays of sunlight that penetrated the thick canopy of leaves above their head. They were currently seated under a weeping willow, hidden away from the whole world outside. Where only the two of them existed, and nothing else mattered.

The place was special to Y/n and Cardan. This was where the two of them would meet all the time, just the two of them, away from their friends and family. In here, they didn't have to pretend, didn't have to act like everything was okay. They could be themselves, and not care about getting hurt.

He leaned closer to her, searching her eyes, his eyes and features softer than Y/n had ever seen before.

"Shut up." She mumbled, but that action had her lips splitting into that smile she was trying so hard to supress.

His grin widened. "There we go."

His hand came up to cup her cheek, his thumb absently brushing her lower lip, his gaze following it with a hungry look. Then his eyes lifted to hers, a question in them.

She dipped her chin almost imperceptibly.

That was enough for him, and he leaned forward, his lips getting closer and closer to hers.

She let her eyes fall shut.

But the kiss never came.

•○🌑○•

She opened her eyes, wondering why he hadn't yet kissed her, and found herself staring at the ceiling of her room.

She blinked blearily, wondering what the hell happened, and then she realised.

It had been a dream.

She closed her eyes again, heaving a sigh as she willed herself to go back to sleep, back to that dream, hoping he'd kiss her before she woke up again.

Of course, that was very nearly impossible.

Because someone decided in that moment that it would be a good idea to knock on her door.

She was certain she knew who it was.

Still she called out, demanding the identity of the knocker.

The answer was immediate. Cardan.

She groaned lowly, dragging her hands down her face.

He didn't wait for her to let him in. The permission wasn't ever needed between the two. That hadn't changed. Yet.

The next moment, he had barged in through the doors, a grin on his stupid face.

She sat up, trying to look anywhere but his face. Heavy emphasis on trying.

"Y/n, guess what happened."

"I am not in the mood, Cardan."

She winced internally. She was being cruel. He had done nothing wrong. It was not his fault he didn't know of her feelings. She had no right to be rude to him, especially when he was so excited about something.

He wasn't bothered by her lack of enthusiasm. He simply plopped down on her bed as she climbed out of it, getting ready for the day as he launched into a story of how after last night's revel, Jude had told him to wait in their bedchambers while she walked into the closet, her skirts swishing around her legs.

How she had retuned without it.

Y/n tried not to pay attention to the details, but she couldn't help it. She had never been able to ignore what Cardan said, never been able to let anything he said go unheard. He had spent nearly all his years being unheard because no one considered him worthy of their time.

She had long ago decided that she was not going to be one of those people.

She heard everything, and her torturous brain created all the images Cardan's words conjured. Her traitor of a heart clenched, but she ignored it.

"That's great Cardan." She said when he finished speaking, and when she looked at him, he was practically glowing with happiness.

Y/n felt guilty for being jealous of the mortal who had everything Y/n ever wanted, but she couldn't bring herself to care when her heart was breaking into pieces everyday.

"It feels like I've waited for this an eternity. Never thought I would get to have Jude in my arms."

She gave him a smile. "I need to meet up with some generals this morning. I need to leave."

He nodded happily, straightening from where he'd been lying on her bed. She watched him walk out of her room, a knot forming in her throat, her resolve hardening.

She needed... she knew what she needed.

•○🌑○•

Jude had her eyebrow raised, and it concerned Y/n how a mere mortal's judgement could make her nervous.

"Tell me again why you want to go on this mission?"

Y/n reigned in a frustrated sigh. "There is no real reason. I just wish to explore the Elfhame more."

The look Jude gave her told her she saw right through the act. But she didn't push the mater.

"There has been rumours of a rebellion on the other side of Elfhame. If you really want to go on this mission, then you need to know that this is an incredibly long and dangerous mission. You'll not only have to investigate the place, but also squash any hint of rebellion you find."

Y/n gave Jude a smile. "Sounds amazing."

"Sure it does." Jude's eyes narrowed as she continued. "If you need more time away to, as you say, to explore, then after you finish this quest, have a tour around Elfhame and meet up with people who have associated with Madoc before. Make sure they are not plotting something behind our backs."

Y/n dipped her chin in a nod. "When can I leave?"

"Before the week ends."

"So does that mean I can leave right now too?"

If possible, Jude's eyes narrowed further and she stood. At that moment, the door behind Y/n opened, and she stiffened as the smell of his perfume reached her.

"Y/n! I thought you were in the meeting with the generals. What are you doing here?"

Y/n smiled stiffly, turning to look at Cardan.

"I had something important to discuss with Jude." She gestured with her hand.

Cardan nodded, as if that was the most understandable thing in the world.

"What were you talking about?"

"Nothing-"

"She is leaving on a long mission-"

Jude and Y/n spoke up at the same time, and Y/n had to resist the urge to smack her forehead.

Cardan's head swung towards Y/n, and he stared at her with wide eyes, his mouth opening and closing, but no words came out.

Y/n turned to Jude, letting some of the fury at her secret being revealed show in her eyes. And then she smiled tightly. "Could you send that list of people and areas where the rebellion is rumoured to be to my room? I need to begin packing."

Jude's eyebrows were high, but she nodded. Y/n bowed, then turned on her heel and strode away, ignoring Cardan and the way he was trying to gain her attention.

As she left the room, she heard him following and calling for her, but she ignored that too.

Just the way she had always ignored her weeping heart, the one that beat solely for Cardan.

The one that was broken beyond repair now.

•○🌑○•

[inumakis-boo]

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ ur text (inumaki toge) ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .

synopsis ␥ you give toge inumaki your phone number, and you become addicted to your phone, and him (for all good reasons). major fluff + friends ↝ lovers.

version one out of three. Enjoy!

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .

When you first started texting toge inumaki, if you were totally honest, you werent entirely sure how it was going to go.

You had only caught the subtle hints of his personality during the rare times you saw him in person- and obviously, it was through tone and face expression, becaude most other ways well were.. not optional.

So.. when you finally got the courage to write down your number on a slip of a yellow post-it note, you didn't know exactly what to expect. Just because you thought he might be a cool guy, doesn't mean he might feel the same about you. He may be cool only around people he is used to training with, or is in the same field-level at him.

But his eyes grazed over the neat handwriting (you mustve written the same note about six different times before handing it over), and his looked back at you with smiling eyes, and a thumbs up.

you tried not to wait up all night for the text- why were you so nervous? it was just a phone number, you had given it to everyone basically on campus. he was just the last one.. because you were too nervous to actually give it over.

the phone had dinged you awake from an after school nap, and you groggily picked it up, expecting nothing more than the student group-chat aruging again, but found an unsaved number with nothing more than-

UNSAVED NUMBER: it's inumaki, you gave me ur phone number the other day

UNSAVED NUMBER: idk if you remember haha srry if this is bothering u but i didnt see u at dinner, did u eat?

you try your best to blink out of the sleepiness from your eyes, trying to gauge what you wanted to say.

YOU: hi, and no i didnt forget 🤙🏻

YOU: no i was sleeping, i mustve missed it oops

He had read it almost immediately, which was.. honestly refreshing.

UNSAVED NUMBER: we thought so, so i hope you enjoy whats outside ur door

What? Outside the door? You climbed out of bed, and slowly creeped the door open-

Nobody was out here? Was someone supposed to be coming?

You look down the hall both ways before looking down. A small bag, tied closed, sitting perfectly infront of your door. When you pick it up, the bag is still warm, so it must not have been there for too long.

When you return to your phone, you see even more messages.

UNSAVED NUMBER: everyone thought it was a good idea so you dont miss dinner cause we be doing too much shit to miss out on food

He was right about that one; the days of training and missions had not gotten any easier, and energy was too important to start losing.

YOU: thank you, but how did you know where my room was?

UNSAVED NUMBER: tis a secret

UNSAVED NUMBER: wait that sounds horrible i promise im not a stalker

UNSAVED NUMBER: i just asked someone if they knew

YOU: that kinda sounds like what a stalker would say T-T

UNSAVED NUMBER: NOOOO IM SORRY forget what i said, eat well pls, gn!!

Ah, so under his collar, he was just.. a normal guy.

A funny one at that, with a personality? Nearly shocking for boys your age. The food was good too, with the

When you tell Itadori about last nights dinner, he raises his eyebrows in surprise.

"Huh, he made you that?" He asks, lips pursed a little. "Thats cool."

"What did everyone else have?" You ask him, as you two both put on your shoes from the school lockers.

"Inumaki made a different dish, a soup."

You had nothing like that- you got salmon and onigiri.

"Huh, thats not surprising." He says after you tell him, "Thats his favorite."

He.. had made you his favorite? and like.. actually made it for you, not just bought whatever from a store. He made something completely different- lighter accounting it being almost bedtime?

So.. he was considerate too.

—

After that, it didn't take long for the messages began to roll back and forth.

What turned from appreciation for his cooking, turned into meme sharing and tiktok sending, then.. into photos, of homework, of a cat brushing up against his leg on the street, a aisle of snacks, asking for what you want. In return, he got imessage games, where he would never lose, opinions on video games and shows, and hypothetical questions about his curse.

YOU: so lets say ur playing a video game

INUDUMBASS: which one

YOU: literally not important, anything competitive

YOU: anyways, ur playing right in a voice chat

INUDUMBASS: yes go on 🙄

YOU: and you start losing, can you say anything

INUDUMBASS: i try not to actively kill people on the mic so no

INUDUMBASS: it will still go through 100%

YOU: nobody said u had to tell someone to do that 😭

INUDUMBASS: clearly you have not been around anybody who is losing in a game before

YOU: god are u rlly that cringy??

INUDUMBASS: are you just finding this out??

INUDUMBASS: and no, i wouldn't ever do that kind of thing, i do have self-control, yknow

YOU: mhm totally

And maybe he did for online players, but he would not hesistate to make the phone drop out of your hands in the lunch room as you two played 8-ball from opposite sides of the table, just to fuck up your aim as you made a winning shot, turning the game over to his benefit.

It's okay, because you got your revenge pulling out the chair from underneath him, and watching him smack his ass on the hard school-floor, and resist not cursing in pain. He would still smile at you- eventually afterwards. He would roll his eyes, but accept the fair play anyways.

It was painfully obvious to everyone else that you two had something going on.

And maybe you didn't realize how much you were admiring him until the personality in his messages shone in him in reality.

Of course, communication was inconvenient but Inumaki wasn't dumb. One eye look told you everything you needed to know. He would snicker at Itadori's occasional mishap while training, then immediately lock in for his own, all the while never sending a mishaped word out of his mouth. And never using more of his curse than needed. Everyone knew he was trustworthy.

Nearly once a day, if he could, he made food (you thought about the first time he made it for you, specially for you, and it makes all his food taste even sweeter) and you watched everyone enjoy it, then noticed as he helped clean up- even though Maki and Megumi urged him to sit. Self-less, kind.

It was really the time on a friday night, after such a long week that everyone decided to ditch the movie theater to instead use the lounges tv (thanks to gojo, was totally decked out for the students), that maybe you start to notice Inumaki- really notice him.

You had been sitting on the food at one end of the long couches, as Toge sat at the other end, his legs draped over the arm rest as he rested his right side against the backrest.

You honestly don't know why you even kept on looking- it wasn't even that serious of a movie, yet he was so intently watching, sweatshirt not big enough to cover the usual half of his face, revealing the thin inky marks on his cheeks, leading to his lips.

He was biting the inside of his lower lip as he watched, probably an old habit back from when he was a kid- he had always been like this, he mentioned once. His arms were lazily crosed, and even his hair had been pushed so strands flicked upwards in tusseled ccondition. His greyish-violet eyes were reflecting all the action scenes, so relaxed but also, analyzing.

For the briefiest moment, you wished it was you that was sitting next to him, not Maki.

Or, the rest of the night, as you tried to focus on the movies, with your arms wrapped around your knees.

It was so odd to think weeks had passed, and suddenly, a boy that you had never known before and were scared to know, had become such a phenomenon in your life. A sustainable source of kindness and excitement that came from a boy that didn't even speak full sentences.

He made your heart flutter. As embarssing as it is. Would probably say it was embarssing, if he knew. Not like it was really ever that serious, right?

You two were friends, maybe an odd pair, but at the very least, very good classmates, and at the best, two people that loved to bully each other and talk even when words were a non-possibility.

—

TOGE: hey btw, you looked great tn.

YOU: lmao i looked like a bum

TOGE: well even if you did, it looked cute

TOGE: anyways, ima going tobed, im sleepy,, night night

was this really all in your head?

YOU: night night, toge :)

TOGE: :)))

It had to be.

The next morning was going to prove difficult for that insanity plea;

TOGE: i have nothing planned for today

YOU: you should be studying 😭

TOGE: nah, i should be hanging out with you

YOU: this is hanging out with me

TOGE: no like, hang out hang out

YOU: where? its too hot outside today

TOGE: in my dorm then?

YOU: with who?

TOGE: with you??

TOGE: At six, you should come hang with me, itll be fun

You swallow as you look down at your phone screen, and take your bottom lip between your teeth. That same feeling was coming back, but not out of any of the reasons before. This felt different. An excited giddiness with freckles of nervousness.

YOU: as long as you got the snacks, i wont miss it

TOGE: ill buy the whole store for you

Ahaha.. so funny right?

Somehow, it was starting to feel like the real joke was how well you were fooling yourself into thinking this was just friendly banter.

You found yourself showering and picking out a comfy outfit, braiding your hair and carefully selecting a perfume. You nearly caught yourself trying to replay the memory of getting dressed the night of the movie-party.

"hey btw, you looked great-"

You wish he could tell you to just stop thinking, would be doing you a huge solid. Especially as you approach his room, which you had found yourself wondering what was on the other side, when the boy stepped out from the door frame.

"Konbu." He waved, with a warm smile. His hair was pushed back from his face a little, and he had a white sleepshirt on, with some baggy grey sweatpants.

"Hi, Toge." You had never really called him by his first name before, and if he thought negatively, the small smile reaching his eyes disobeyed the thought.

He stepped aside and let you take your first look into the room- maybe you had not thought about it so hard, but it somehow made sense.

Band posters on some of the walls, poor taken photos of the second years and first years all together taped there too, an occasional plant dangling off a book shelf or window sill, a dresser, a little worn with character, sits nearby with a tv angled on its edge, towards the bed for easy viewing. A PS4 sits behind it, along with a headset, with the mic turned away from the front.

He has books sitting on his desk, an old fashioned hand-carry radio sits on one of its edges, and it makes for also a side table to his bed, sitting on a metal bedframe with blankets and infamous navy bedsheets.

Its springing with his character, and the smell of a refreshing cologne is in the air- the same type she would catch sometimes lingering as he walked by.

"Its not what I expected."

He walked by her to sit at his spinning desk chair, turning to face her. "Salmon?" He inquires.

"Well yeah, its just your style. With the uniform and your curse, it might not be so obvious to other people who don't know you."

He leaned back in the chair and looked up interestedly at the ceiling. Was that rude to say?

He takes out his phone, and a quick second later, presents the phone screen to you, opened to the notes app.

/i never thought abt it like that/

/well, i mean, i have but im glad you understand it, kinda impressive that you figured it out/

/or im just easily readable/

"That would be a good thing, right?" You leave the phone screen on, but puts it away from your view. "That your friends get to read you, despite everything. That means youve gotten good at what you do.."

Toge's lips quirk to one side as he thinks, and your eyes watch as his marks follow the corners.

He raises his hand to get a wishy-washy motion, and you furrow your brows. When he types, he stops you from picking up your phone aswell, only to present what hes wrote in the text box.

/Well, kinda. no matter what I do to express myself, its kinda hard to be fully understood. i miss out on a huge part of everyday life, even if people understand what idea im trying to get across, its atypical./

/no amount of tone or facial expression can amount to words and their complex meanings. i think i am actually really lucky that my curse does not extend to messages- i think id be screwed./

"I don't think its too different to what people really feel like though." You explain to listening ears. "Most people felt like they aren't totally understood, that people just don't get them totally.. but I understand that, you don't have much of a choice, and we take advantage of what we can do sometimes."

You watch his face change a little to settle on your features more- and you feel yourself being pulled into his attention.

"I think even if your curse had taken away your ability to communicate in ways you do now, youre still worth knowing, Toge. I think everyone agrees."

His eyes soften, and it nearly strikes your heart into a million pieces. His smile too, could he be anymore cute? He wasn't hiding it this time. He shows how much he appreciates your words in the flush of his cheeks and the way his palms meet together.

He lets out a relaxing sigh, and looks away, then his eyes light up to bags sitting by the bedside.

"Sujiko." He urges to look, pointing to the grocery bag, which seems to be loaded with stuff. You walk closer and grab it, then find yourself sitting down quietly on the side of his bed.

The bag is full of snacks and drinks, some previously mentioned in chats, like he had written them all down, and got them for you to see.

"You bought the whole store, huh?" You raised an eyebrow playfully.

A grin and a happy thumbs up in return.

As promised.

You spend the next few hours bambling about his bedroom, looking through all the semi-decent hidden school papers, and letting him explain all the pictures on the wall.

He explained things thoroughly, like each detail was inside of him, kept for safekeeping. His eyes would light up in such appreciation, and it almost felt natural when you were caught in his gaze. Like he could keep you for safekeeping too.

Of course, his PlayStation was clean and ready for use, and by the time you two had gotten the controllers out and opened Ramune bottles, the sunlight was long gone. Outside was quiet, but you two didn't care much as you two sat together, him letting you sit on the bed while he took the floor. Glaringly bright flashes of action splattered against the postered walls, and more than once, your playful nudge with your foot against his arm to mess up caused much whining and laughter alike.

His laughter was like an entirely different language, speaking of his delight. It was not a rarity, but still a treasure. It is infectious and only serves to remind you that he is just a teenager, and he is having so well-deserved fun.

Eventually, Maki knocked against the wall and shouted through muffled barriers "Inumaki, be quiet, I am trying to sleep!" the sound alarmed them both, but only created further snickering.

But, they turned off the game in a half-apology and instead put on some horror flick that was on a student-shared Hulu account, and you both settle down eating gummi worms and flavored popcorn.

Maybe it was being distracted by having such a good time, it takes the calm before the storm of the horror movie to realize Toge and you have gotten really comfortable on his bed, backs against his pillows. They smell like his shampoo.. or maybe you are just close enough to smell it off of him. It's soft, comfortable, and clean, and something new to your senses.

He is warm, you can tell. His body is close enough, legs crossed as they lay straight down on top of the duvet, but his arm supports his head, and is behind you on the pillow. He seems semi-entertained (of course, you had challenged him to watch a horror movie.. but maybe challenging a Jujutsu Sorcerer to not get scared was faulty logic. There were scarier things than makeup and bad wigs.)

You didn't wanna look at your phone- you didn't want to see the time and be guilty for staying so long, you knew it must be close to midnight. Would he tell you that you should go to sleep? Would he bring you back to your dorm and say goodbye at the door?

Ignoring the time for the sake of Toge's soft cologne and sheets? Sounded pretty selfish, although it made your stomach flutter.

"Am I keeping you awake?" It comes out as a whisper, and you lean in closer.

"Bonito flakes." He whispered back swiftly with a head shake no, tearing his eyes from the screen to you. He smiles a little, charmingly, as the flecks of violet in his eyes flash with the TV screen. This was the first time you saw them in all their detail, and it makes your heart skip a beat.

When you both turn away from each other, you can feel his arm shift from his face, and around the pillow you were laying on. It makes you shift inevitably closer.

His shirt bunches towards the side he is lying on, revealing the sliver of skin between the hem and the top of his sweatpants, toned and pale in the soft light. You try not to stare.

It makes you think. Was thing.. flirting?

Was the attraction to the cursed speech user simmering ever since the first message? Since the first time you saw him at the beginning of the school year?

Would anybody blame you? All those times when there was nothing to be scared of when he proved nothing less than just a great friend, kind, playful, selfless, and strong?

You knew that would never change- for as long as he was here and breathing. He wanted everyone to know that's who he was.

Who would blame you, as you let the feeling ride with sliding your hand to the middle of his chest? His white sleepshirt is soft after many rounds of wash, but what is even better is resting your cheek against his shoulder, right at the top where his arm meets, and you can feel his eyes glance at you. It feels like such a relief, although you wonder if this is really normal to be happy about.

"Is this okay?" You whisper.

In response, his hand slips away from the distance on the pillow behind you, and the pads of his fingers rest on your arm, hugging you slightly closer.

"Mhm." He hums in approval quietly, and his fingertips graze your soft skin, up and down slowly. "Salmon."

This tango had endured until the near end of the movie, yet you could barely pay attention to any of the plots because Toge was holding you so securely, and letting you trace circles on the middle of his chest, and the sound of his deep breaths were overtaking your thoughts anyways rather than the fake monster on screen.

You are nearly ready to close your eyes, when you can feel a squeeze on your arm, and when you open your eyes, you can see the same notes app in dark mode, with something written out.

/Are you tired?/

"N-No, not yet." You look at the time at the top of the screen. 12:49 am.

He seems amused by that, raising an eyebrow.

"You're just comfortable." You say as you both totally ignore the last few minutes of the movie. "It's nice being with you."

Toge looks at you like he wants to say something, pursing his lips as he smiles and glances away for a moment.

Is your heart racing? This is the best you've felt in weeks. Why does it feel like your stomach is fluttering?

He presents his notes again, and you honestly wish he could say them himself.

/When we first met, I honestly wouldn't think we would be so close. I am really happy we are. I feel like now is a good time to tell u, since we are alone./

Your cheeks feel like they are burning, and its your turn to look away in feble attempt to hide the flush arising.

"I am happy too." You begin to explain, "You're.. you're fun and kind.. you have always been so nice to me and listen to me snore on about classes and training. You watch all the stupid tiktoks I send you and ask for my opinions. I always feel like you notice everything and youre trustworthy. I can.. only hope that I am half as genuine to you as you are to me."

Toge nods in confirmation. It makes you feel like you're on fire, and the background music with the black credits screen cannot even pull your attention from him.

His chest was rising and falling right below your fingertips, and his face slowly focused on you, the tension feels so good and thick, that you honestly wonder how much longer you will convince yourself that normal friendships feel like this.

He was always honest with you. He deserved it in return, but it might be the most vulnerable you've been in years. He deserved that too- he had never held anything back.

"I think I like you."

The words leave your mouth before you even have a chance to smack yourself into reality. Instead, they sit between the darkness and him.

"More than just being friends."

His grip loosens just a tad, and panic seems to run through your body- he was not interested, you had completely misunderstood the situation.

"I-Im sorry-" You take your hands away and try your best to sit up from practically lying down. You were in a boys room, what were you thinking? You should get some space from him, so he doesn't think you a total freak. "I didn't-"

You can feel a tight bond around your wrist, keeping you right where you sit, and when you whip your head back, his eyes are wide with interest and warmth that you want to melt into a puddle of dumb choices. He opens his mouth, maybe to try to say something, but he considers it over and over again. When he feels sure you wont go, he lets go.

He raises a finger to his eye-

I.

both hands cover the center of his chest, cusping it almost-

Heart.

Finally, one last finger. Pointed at-

You..

Was he trying to say.. I like you?

Your body relaxes finally, and the urge to run away is still lingering, but you can't honestly say you want to. Not with how his eyes are flattering with some kind of emotion, his arms opening.

You can't hold back any longer. Your arms swiftly move around his neck as you envelop him so closely, and he instantly hugs you back, pulling you so close your lips meet the skin of his neck. He sounds like he is humming, his hands rubbing your back soothingly. You sit an appreciate his scent, the feeling of his skin, his warmth, for just a moment or two longer until he slowly departs from you, searching your face for any further comment.

"That's really.. really good to hear." You sigh out, with a bit of a smile, reaching to rub a weary eye; you realize he has taken your hand in the process.

He offers his own hand, letting it rub the corner were some wetness at resided, before letting the rest of his finger skin around you hairline, then through your strands of hair. He follows each motion, as he tries to comfort you.

Your hand reaches to sit atop his, and although its late and if someone knew you two were here together, not only would it at the very least be a detention and school clean up duty and at the very best, be a rumor the other students would talk about, despite this you honestly didn't care when the perfect boy was sitting right infront of you, with tussled hair and red lips, just like that night during the movie-party.

"I know its late." She started to say, but he quickly took out his phone again. "I won't keep you up anymore."

/you keep me up no matter what./

/atleast here i get to hear your pretty voice and see your face./

"What do you think about.. when you think of me?" You needed to know what he had been thinking of you all this time.

Instead of using his phone, his hands gently present themselves, and touch parts of your body chastely.

His hands travel from your palm, fingers skimming past your veins in a kind of silent poetry-

Your scars.. your freckles, your strength, your sunkissed summertime skin.

Then, he brushes past your shoulder to twirl around with your hair-

your beauty, the way you attract people.

Then up your face to your temple-

Your brain, your mind.

Then your cheeks-

Your flush, your sweet smiles.

Finally, the pad of his thumb grazes against your chin, right below your lower lip.

The way you speak, the way you are.

You can feel the urge in him, radiating off his lidded eyes and hesistant touch, quietly as he landscapes your being.

"You can, yknow." His eyes look up towards your gaze, "If you want too. If you are ready, of course-"

"Please," The words stilled you instantly, yet he continued holding your face more tenderly. They were soft and yet thick. "Kiss me."

The curse enacted on you, and although for a brief flash there was some concern in his face that perhaps it was too soon, quickly was dismissed when he saw you come closer by the help of his hand, and for just a moment held the proximity between your pairs of lips before slowly pressing close, your lips gently against his.

It was chaste and quiet on the outside, but it was like adding more gunpower to an already lit firework, the explosion of emotion surging your veins making you never wanting to leave.

His thumb was caressing the side of your cheek, it was making you dizzy with his attention. It was everything you had hoped for the moment you had even thought of him- to be close in every single way, to know every part of the perfect, strong, peaceful boy that you so clearly saw every day.

It felt like a dream, but at the very least, hoped you would wake up on his chest, with the Playstation off and the soft breathing of your boy in the air.

But instead, youre both here, and he is kissing you like he has won the lottery.

You both smile, until you couldn't tell when the kiss ended, and where the laughter began.

Surely, he was smart and kind and self-less and strong and all those things youd toss about in your mind at night.

But the idea that this may have never happened because you were too shy to say hello to the usually quiet and calm boy, made you feel like the stupidest yet luckiest girl in the world.

Maybe it was you that had won the jackpot, just by giving away a simple yellow post-it note.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . . ݁₊

thank you so much for reading! this is only ending one. i have plans for a nsfw verison and an misunderstanding verison. please let me know if any of yall are interested!

see you later pookies!

[the-record]

COWBOYS LIKE ME

SYNOPSIS: youll never stop letting her in.

PAIRING: cowboy!abby x reader

WARNINGS: none??

A/N: yall remember when i wrote some fics and made a ton of ideas and series and then disappeared??? WOOPS!! heres a little holiday present!! maybe there will be more, idk

my masterlist

after that last night, abby hadnt shown at your door again. she knew she was wrong for it, for everything. all you had done was love and care for her, treating her with sweet southern kindness. she hated herself for leaving you.

you couldn’t find it within your heart to hate her. she didn’t lie when she said it wasn’t safe for the two of you beyond the farm. it still didn’t make it hurt any less when she left without a word.

you gave up after three months and she didnt come by even once. you fell back into your regular routine. afternoon tea, church, chores. you even found a bookstore that would fill the quiet hours between tasks.

abby didn’t forget about you though, how could she? she had people all around town keeping an eye on you, ensuring you were never around danger. subtle misdirections and such. just because she couldn’t be there didn’t mean she doesn’t care.

you’d attempted to forget her, and almost had.

but it was cold and snowy out, just days before christmas, and abby found herself close to the only place she could call home.

you werent shocked to hear a knock ok your door so late in the evening, figuring one of the ladies had stopped by with news and a gift. but seeing her at your door stopped your heart.

“can i come in?” you ushered her in, taking in her shivering frame. “im really sorry if im putting you out, but could i stay here? just for a night if thats all you please.”

you nodded, just enough to see, still starstruck. she smiled softly and knocked you out of your state. you grabbed the snowy coat off her shoulders, helping her take off those boots you knew didnt do much in this cold. you pulled her to the fire place, setting her beside it and finding a blanket to wrap around her body.

she laughed as you sat beside her, just staring. “gotta love southern hospitality.” she joked, but you barely laughed. abby sighed and picked at her fingers, “i really am sorry. i feel i cant stop hurting you.”

you merely nodded before getting up. heading to the kitchen, your head clouded as you fell into routine. as you put the kettle on, you couldnt help but wonder why she was back on your doorstep. you didnt stop wondering even as you watched the tea steep, when you brought it back to the now warmer blonde.

but when you held it out to her, you didnt let go. “are you gonna leave again?” her silence was answer enough. your hand dropped and you turned, leaving for your room.

abby flinched when your door slammed.

her boots still sat beneath your bed, gathering dust, fingerprints still visible from the last time you missed her. you listened to her footsteps as your fingers brushed all over the shoes.

she roamed the kitchen, cleaning it the best she could before she made her way upstairs. abby didnt want to hurt you. she loved you, even if she struggled to say it. when she knocked she heard a quiet ‘come in’, yet she still hesitated at the door.

the door opened for her. you staring up at her blank face, a tear stain she wanted to wash away and never see again.

“i love you.”

when the sun streamed in the next morning, it didnt fall on just you. a weight slung over your stomach, one of abby’s arms dead weight across you. you couldn’t help but smile.

when it snowed again the next day, the bed was cold, but the house wasn’t. downstairs, abby had the fire going and breakfast on the stove for the both of you.

and when the sun shown and the birds sang months later, she laid in bed watching your peaceful sleep.

her cuts and bruises had long disappeared. that chill she had that made her shake, warmed. the emptiness she had felt for all those years, had been filled with love and care she yearned for her whole life.

she felt it when she saw you.

[salamanderst]

Part series?? Lmk

One of the girls

{Chris Sturniolo}

Warnings: pet names?? (baby(, use of y/n, mentions of sex (nothing happens yet!!) toxic!chris (sorry 😞 he gets better i swear) fratboy!chris kinda??, also i forgot to say this last smut but English is not my first language so i apologize for spelling mistakes!! lmk if theres anything else.

A/n: Omg I think I’m actually tweaking I’ve been putting off writing this because I think all my writing abilities just got up and left. So I’m so sorry if this is ass {it probably is} but erm let’s go!

Orange; Chris speaking

Pink; reader speaking

“So what do you wanna watch?” I ask Chris.

I came over to watch a movie, every Friday we like to watch a movie after he’s filmed with his brothers, but right now he’s acting off.

“Ehh. It’s what ever, I don’t care.” He replies eyes glued to his phone clearly not listening to me.

“Chris, hello???”

“Yea, yea whatever you say.”

"Chris im gonna fuck other men." i saw with a grin on my face.

he immediately looks up from his phone looking straight into my eyes. no words coming out of him.

"chris im kidding, now will you listen please?" i say laughing.

"yea, im sorry." he give me a smile, he paces me his phone so he wont go on it, i slip into my pocket giving him a kiss on the cheek.

“Thank you. Now what movie do you wanna watch?” i said snuggling up to him grabbing the remote.

“Ohh how about that new one on Disney that just came out”

___________________________________

We’re about half way through the movie and Chris goes to the washroom.

I still have his phone in my pocket, honestly i completely forgot about till i felt it ding. i pulled in out of my pocket to see a notification.

Who the fuck is Olivia?!

I put his phone down on the coffee table as I hear his footsteps coming closer to the couch.

“Hey babe im kinda tried I think ima go to bed, you wanna head home?”

I’m gonna kill this man.

I grab his phone from the table. “Who the fuck is Olivia. Chris?”

at least that’s what i wanted to do. But I’m too tried for drama right now. and me and Chris are actually good, i don't wanna start stuff.

“Yea sure babe I’ll see you later, good night!” i said forcing a smile walking to his front door, as he grabbed his phone and walked up to his room.

___________________________________

i never go to sleep angry, its my number one rule. and i broke it because of this stupid man whore who i'm not even dating, just stupid friends with benefits. but we agreed not to fuck or text other people.

fuck it. im gonna go talk to him.

i get in my car and drive to his place, its 9am but if he wants to fuck other women i can interrupt his sleep. i knock on his door as load as i can, i forgot his brothers also live there.

Nick opens the door, as im about to yell i see his face and step back.

"y/n whats going on??" nick says rubbing his eyes and giving me a look, i felt so bad.

"oh my god im so sorry, i didnt mean to wake you up. im just here to talk to Chris."

"oh uh.. hes in his room." he said gave me a wired look, letting me in as he went back up to his room.

i closed the door behind me and walked downstairs to Chris's room, i was hesitant at first but then i opened the door, i didnt knock i didnt really want to. chris was awake on his phone staring up at me.

"oh.. hi." he said putting down his phone furrowing his eyebrows. "whats going on?"

"are you texting other people?" i said calmly as i sat at the edge of his bed, honestly im surprised i didnt yell, my brain feels like its forgot how to.

"what are you talking about..?" he said sitting up to face me more, acting confused.

"chris, please..." i took a pause, god he was so gorgeous. its hard to be mad at someone whos this pretty. "be honest."

"baby, i am being honest." he said cupping my face with his right hand. i cant fall into him, i told myself repeatedly.

i brushed his hand off my face. "chris, i saw a text on your phone last night. from someone named, Olivia."

he was taken aback he knew what i was taking about. a part of me wanted him to deny it and say its some friend. but no friend asks if a girl is still at some mans house. it wasnt a friend, and we both knew that.

"i-im sorry.." he said in a very quiet voice, i was hurt that it was true. but im thankful he was honest. "its this girl i met at a party, but i swear we only fucked once." he kept talking but my mind went blank after the word 'fucked', was i not enough for him? was i bad, that he had ti get other women to satisfy him? i started to over think everything. what does this bitch do that i cant??

tears started to well up in my eyes when i heard his words. "woah, woah. y/n whats wrong??" he said putting his hand on my shoulder.

"No! dont chris! this is fucking bullshit, we agreed not to fuck other people!" i said in a shaky voice standing up.

"c-can we just talk, please...?" he said softly standing up. i didnt wanna fucking talk? who the fuck would want to talk??

"no. im leaving you're a fucking whore. i should've left before anything started." i said scoffing grabbing my bag and stomping out his room running to the front door, out to my car.

i started my car a drove home, i sat in the parking lot of my apartment for at least 20 minutes before getting out of my and heading inside. i sat on my couch, ill talk to him in a couple of day. at least it was only one girl right...?

[mythicmanuscripts]

weird idea but aegon x vampire reader. reader feeeing of hil etc.

thx xoxo

So I went all the way to the bottom of my askbox and I discovered this absolute masterpiece of a question. I love this, 10/10. I'm tag this with 'Aegon x vampire!reader' so that we can discuss it more under the same tag and also so if you arent interested then just block that tag. I think I'm also going to make a larger tag of 'hotd supernatural!au' so that we can possibly discuss other stuff about this? (Sidenote: both aemond and rhaenyra/daemon would LOVE to be with a witch)

Anyway, NSFW sub!aegon with vampire reader below the cut

So firstly, you know how some people say they don't get the dear over vampires because if a hot person wanted to suck their blood and fuck them then they'd love it? Yeah that's aegon, absolutely zero reservations he realises he's caught the attention of a very attractive vampire and he drives in headfirst.

I think this makes the most sense if the supernatural were normal in this au, but I think vampires would still have a pretty bad rep? They're known for being lone wolfs who use people and can easily hurt others and generally dont tend to be seen very often.

You notice Aegon for the first time at a pub, and of course he's surrounded by people because he's the king. He looks around the room at one point and spots you in the shadows. He's not sure what makes him do it, but he decides to go over to you.

You know who he is of course, but you don't address him as 'your grace' and instead just chuckle and call him pretty boy. Which... from that moment he's hooked.

You end up in his bed at the red keep, and you don't even feed off him that night, instead it's just sex. Which... you may have just ruined Aegon for everyone else because he's pretty sure he saw god during his third orgasm. You completely wreck him, turning him into a whining, shivering mess who cant even speak properly.

You dont leave then of course, because he's far too sweet for that, and you stay to give him aftercare. You intend to leave once he's calmed down, but then he falls asleep in your arms and you can't bring yourself to risk waking him up by leaving. So you end up sleeping with him for the night.

He's awake when you wake up the next morning, but he's still in your arms.

Vampires are known to be very strong and very dangerous, and logically Aegon knows he should feel scared being this close and vulnerable with one, but it's actually the opposite. He knows how strong and dangerous you are and he feels so much safer for it? He knows you'll protect him, even though he's just met you he's certain of it.

Once you wake up, you quickly realise you have a slight problem. You hadnt intended to spend the night, and you should have fed at least a little last night (instead you just fucked the king, which, fair enough).

Aegon is worried when you push him out of your arms, and he's looking at you with these wide puppy eyes and batting at your arms, trying to get you to open them again. He's just very needy little thing.

You tell him that you loved the night before and he was perfect, but now you have to get going because you haven't fed in a while. You expect this to be a good enough reason, but it's not to him. When he hears that, he simply holds his arm out for you, wrist up.

You push it away and look away from him, not wanting to lose control but he's insistent. You rocked his world the night before, and he wants to help!! I knows you won't kill him, so he wants to help!

You give in, even though you know you shouldn't, and end up drinking from him. If there's one thing Aegon didnt expect, it's how good it felt? It feels insane, so so so good.

You don't drink much out of fear of hurting him, but you drink enough and the moment you pull away, aegon is moving forwards and back into your arms.

Needless to say, you return to the castle very often.

(Sidenote: what about the reverse of this with Aemond? He's the vampire and he pretty much just follows the reader around like a lost puppy. He won't feed from anyone else, he'd rather starve than feed from another)

[riddlessecretss]

My dorm room dalliance - Part two (enemies x lovers)

Based on this photo^^ (aftecare)

“Fuck baby you did so well”

You smile from Mattheo’s praise, you’ve never felt so normal after sex. You get up to set yourself a shower. “Mattheo” “Yes?”

“Stop staring at my ass.” You hear him groan and light a cigarette. You roll your eyes, when is he going to stop with that?

You set a temperature and step in. You start washing your hair when it gets quiet, too quiet. “Mattheo?”…

“MATTHEO?”

You think to yourself that he probably just left. You carry on brushing through your hair and humming to yourself. Having a dorm all for yourself is great!

You finish in the shower and walk out to feel a breeze seep through the balcony door. You grab your wand and walk over to be not so graciously greeted with Mattheo smoking with his headphones on.

You snatch them and place them on your head to be met with Don’t by Bryson Tiller. Not bad Riddle. “You’ve been here this while time?”

“Well where else would be on a friday night if there’s not a common room party?” He scoffs as you give him his headphones and walk back into the room to get changed when Mattheo follows you back in.

“Are you staying here tonight?”

“NO.” He shot back.

“What do you think i am, homeless?”

“No I just thought youd want some nice company since you also have a dorm to yourself.” -Silence- “Aww y/l/n you get lonely?” He teases.

“Shut up Riddle.” You button up your pyjama shirt.

“Ill stay, but only because i’m tired.”

You let out giggle and settle in bed. Mattheo gets in after you and cuddles into your waist.

”It does get pretty lonely by yourself, you know?” He looks into your eyes, hoping for a sense of peace. “I know how you feel, i have to occupy my silence with reading, although it gets quite boring at times.”

“Hm my occupation is all this.” Mattheo holds up a book which at first looks like just doodles but holds some of his heartfelt feelings.

Turns out we are more alike then we thought.”This feels normal. Mattheo do you feel this as well.” You felt your heart skip a beat as Matheo answers with a simple yes. He holds you tighter as you two fall asleep together.

————————————————————————————————————————

~At around 3AM~

You wake up with a headache and as soon as you get up you instantly know why.

“Do you have to smoke that shit in here?”

“Someone’s cranky.”

“I’m not I just have a headache.”

“Here.” He hands you a box of a strange looking pill. “And what is this?” “A pain relieving pill.”

You take it without question and look over Mattheo at an empty can, a lighter and an ashtray. Where did that come from? But out of everything, even the spliff in his hand, you notice his notebook on his chest open on a specific page.

“What did you write?”

“What?”

“In your book. Can I see?”

“No.” He turns a cold shoulder and puts his cigarette out and his book in his bag. I mean i am curious but a no is a no.

You turn away too and try to get some sleep.

————————————————————————————————————————

~At 7:30AM~

You wake up and notice Mattheo gone. It doesn’t surprise you at this point. But what surprises you is to see his book open on the same page it was last night with a note that read:

Since i can’t let you read it when im there…

You laugh to yourself and you pick up the book to see:

I can’t possibly contain my feelings for her trapped in a box in a corner of my heart, she deserves more. Even the way she sleeps, she looks mythical. She needs to be mine…

… Decorated in blue ink doodles confessing his love for me.

“Oh Mattheo if only you knew how i really feel about you…”

Im so so so sorry i didnt post this yesterday, I suddenly got so ill and tired and fell asleep early. I hope this makes up for it. And thank you guys so much for all the likes on the Slytherin boys react: aftercare post. This is part two so I recommend to read part one first which can be found here. I dont know if there will be a part 3 tell me if you guys want one. Navaiah 💘

[wonbin-truther]

too nice haechan x reader - 791 words angst, mentions of drinking and bars, reader fumbles the bag (haechan) again

haechan watches across the bar as you down your 10th shot of some clear liquid that another man had bought for you. he watches as your lips that were once his move against the lips of another man. mark walks up to his side and groans, "dude she's not worth it. i don't even know why she's here." he was right. you lived on the other side of town. a part of him wonder and hoped you were here because you knew he would be too. mark nudged him to get his attention, "how about we go to karaoke." haechan broke his gaze away from your figure, walking out the door with a mans hand in your back-pocket. "sure," he downed the last of his drink. it seemed as if you followed him everywhere making haechan wonder which god he pissed off in a past life. the next time was in the rain. there you sat on the swing of the old playground as the cold pellets hit you, looking down at your feet. hyuck also wonders in that moment what magnetic force is in him as he walks up to you, placing his umbrella over you. the rain hits him and soaks through his sweater but he doesnt care as your eyes looked up and met his. even as the rain beaded down from your hair onto your face he could tell you had been crying. he put his hand out to you and you took it, following him to his house. you sat with your head down as he lifted the wet top over your head, replacing it with a dry out. you let him dry your hair with a towel and lead you too his room. you sat on the edge of his bed and the tears flowed again, "i'm so sorry." he didnt say anything as he gathered a pillow and blanket for himself. "hyuck im so sorry. you're too nice for me," you continued. he paused to look at you before retreating to the couch for the night, "i know". when he woke up the next day you were nothing but a fleeting memory and crumbled up bed sheets at the foot of his bed. he expected a little more from a girl he dated for nearly 4 years, maybe a note or a text. he looked at his phone to no notification. he wondered for a moment if he blocked you again but remembered you remained unblocked after he drunk called you 5 times last month (none of which you answered).

he hated this run around he always did with you. here he was, drunk in your car as you drove to your apartment. he blabbered in the passengers seat about how he missed you and you sat in silence as your eyes were locked on the road. you swore you had mark's number saved. you paced around your living room as haechan was asleep on your couch. you couldn't have him here. nothing good ever came of haechan in your close proximity. you had broken it off with him last summer. you can't place why it happened. when your close friends asked you what happened you shrugged and just replied "the spark burned out". it was a lie. even as he laid on your couch drooling on a pillow, smelling like cheep wiskey and another girls perfume, you felt nothing but pure love. it was something inside you that you could never tell anyone about. a little voice saying he was too good for you. you never deserved him. why would someone like you be with someone like him? you let the little voice win. no matter who you made out with at bars or who walked you up to your doorstep and made sure you got in safe, they would never be lee haechan. you thanked everything when you finally found marks number. he picked up on the second ring. "uhh who is this?" his voice was sleep deprived "hi sorry it's yn. um can you please pick up haechan" "yea give me a second" and he hung up mark lee was just as you had remembered. he had a certain boyish charm you could never quite put your finger on but pulled you towards him. he walked into your house and slung haechan's arm over his shoulder, hoisting him up. "thank you for keeping him safe." "please dont mention he was here in the morning" mark gave you a soft smile as he bid you goodnight and left. he was true to his word and you didn't a text or call from haechan in the morning. the disappointment settled in your gut as you reminded yourself he was too good for you.

[ohmtoff]

could i request a fic of reader and nick having a friends with benefits type of relationship, reader is in love with nick but doesn’t realise nick is in love with reader too so they have a mutual pining situation?

Mutually Exclusive

Summary: You can’t handle being just friends with benefits with Nick, not when you’re in love with him.

WC: 1.6k

Contains: angst, pining, misunderstandings, friends with benefits (or is it?)

a/n: heyyy!! so sorry for taking so long to write this😭 hope it’s okay that i didnt write any smut even though it’s a FWB prompt lol i just wasnt feeling to write smut sorryyy anon. hope you like ittt <3

——————————————————————————

Your head was pillowed on Nick’s chest, your fingers skimming over Nick’s soft stomach, occasionally trailing it across his chest hair which makes him giggle, and you were trying to figure out how to tell him you’d been asked on a date. Nick was running his fingers through your hair, occasionally placing a soft kiss to your temple, and your head is racking on how to explain that this will be the last time you will ever be in bed with him. You both had just finished a particularly sweet bout of intimacy, you felt utterless boneless, and you needed to somehow tell Nick you couldn’t keep doing this.

When you had first met Nick — at a party thrown by Larray — you’d immediately been drawn to him. How could you not be; Nick was cute and soft, so handsome in a way that still somehow felt comfortable and approachable. Eyes so blue and piercing that your heart immediately fluttered at the first eye contact. And Nick had apparently been drawn to you as well, at least that was the impression you got when you both ended up making out in the corner of the party a mere hour later.

After that first time, you both just kept… hooking up. Initially, it was only at parties, both gravitating towards each other and ending the night entangled in some way. Soon, after Nick had insisted you and him exchange numbers, it morphed into scheduled hook-ups, no pretense of a party required. And then you both started hanging out afterwards, trying a new restaurant or watching a movie or just talking. You’d catch meals together and facetime each other before going to sleep.

You weren’t sure when you both transitioned from random strangers hooking up to hook-ups who occasionally hang out to inseparable friends who also happen to hook up with each other, but you didn’t want to question it. Nick was maybe the best thing to ever happen to you, and you weren’t about to complicate that with logistics.

A finger ran over your face, smoothing out the wrinkle that had appeared between your eyes, snapping you out of your thoughts and into the present. “What’s got you so stressed?”

I thought I was okay with us just being friends with benefits but someone else asked me out and I’ve realised that I don’t want to go out with someone who isn’t you but that’s not what this is and I don’t know what to do about it because this isn’t enough but I don’t want anyone else.

“Mm, nothing.” You nuzzled into Nick’s chest.

“I know you. You don’t get that little crinkle between your eyes unless you got something on your mind.” Nick kissed the area in question, featherlight and soft.

“You know that guy, Curtis?” You focused on the tattoo of Nick’s arm, smoothing over them lightly, marveling at the goosebumps he left in his wake.

“Um, I think? That one guy that’s stalking you?” Nick chuckled, and the vibrations in his chest shook you just a bit. Just enough to remind you how physically close you and him were in that moment, as if neither boy existed without the other. Something panged near your heart.

“He’s not… He’s not stalking me.”

“Oh, so he just happens to appear everywhere you are? I don’t think we’ve gone anywhere in the last month without him ‘randomly’ showing up. He’s obsessed with you.” Nick pushed back your hair from your forehead and kissed you there. “Can’t say I blame him, though.”

Your chest ached. You weren’t sure when you’d fallen in love with Nick, but you were now firmly in the throes of it and every delicate gesture from Nick, every word of affection, every tiny touch, twisted something deep in your stomach. When Nick held you like this, naked and sated and warm, and looked at you with those adoring eyes, touched you like you mattered, You found it almost impossible to hold back all that you was feeling.

“You obsessed with me, Nicolas?” You hoped the joke would defuse some of the tension, maybe make Nick believe you too could be cool and casual about all of this.

“Yeah,” Nick whispered before cupping your face like you were something precious and pulling you into a kiss, small and slow and perfect.

You wanted to cry.

You needed a moment to gather yourself after Nick pulled back, eyes closed and lips still puckered.

“What did Curtis do?” Nick’s fingers returned to your hair.

“He, uh, he…” You thought it may be less painful to pluck out his own eyelashes than continue. “He asked me out.”

You hadn’t known how you thought Nick would react, but laughter had not been anywhere on your list. But Nick did just that, laughing boisterously, shaking them both. “Oh, wow. Poor Curtis.”

Poor Curtis. What did that mean?!

You frowned and sat up, needing to somehow find a way to put space between yourself and Nick. You turned to face the wall and crossed your arms, fighting back tears.

“You don’t have to be cruel, Nick.”

“What?” Nick sat up too, placing a tentative hand on your shoulder, which you shrugged off. “I just meant—”

“I know what you meant!” You looked down, concentrating on Nick’s white sheets. “Just because you don’t want to date me doesn’t mean no one else does.”

“What?! What are you talking about?!” Nick almost sounded angry, as if you were the one mocking him.

“People can like me, Nick! People can find me attractive and compelling and worthwhile.” Tears formed in the corners of your eyes.

“Babe, I know that—”

“So why did you laugh? Why did you pity Curtis for liking me?”

“What are you talking about?!” Nick sounded on the verge of tears as well, which finally made you turn to look at him.

His face was flushed red, his eyes glassy and wet, and he almost looked scared, as though your words were wounding him somehow.

“I’m worth someone liking me like that. I deserve that.” Some of your resolve was slipping at Nick’s expression, but you still managed to choke out a self-defense.

“I know that. You think I don’t know that?!” A tear slid down Nick’s cheek.

“You don’t get to cry, Nick. You’re the one insulting me.”

Another tear fell down Nick’s perfect face, splotchy and red, but still perfect. “I don’t get to cry when my boyfriend seems to be trying to break up with me by accusing me of not liking him and talking about another guy asking him out?”

“Wh–what?”

“I’m gonna cry over that, baby.” Nick’s voice was thick, his face now covered in a steady stream of tears. “I’m gonna cry over you breaking my heart.”

“Boyfriend?”

“Don’t make fun of me.”

“You have a boyfriend?” Since when did Nick have a boyfriend?

“Apparently I don’t anymore.” Nick’s voice caught at the end, a sob escaping his mouth.

“I— I’m your boyfriend?” Were you an idiot? Had you been dating Nick this whole time? You reached out to grab Nick’s face, wiping tears with the pads of your thumbs. “Nick. I am genuinely asking you: am I your boyfriend?”

Nick gaped at you. “I— yes? I thought so.”

You floundered for a moment, surveying Nick’s face for any sign of insincerity. Instead, all you found was wide-eyed hope. In lieu of any verbal response, you pulled Nick’s face to your own, kissing him with all you had, all the twisted aches in your stomach, all the blind hopes in your heart. You guided Nick back down, settling on top of him as your kiss deepened. The only thing you could think was NickNickNick.

“Mm.” Nick lightly pushed you back, separating your lips so he could talk. “You really didn’t know?”

“You never said anything. I don’t even know if you liked me like that, I thought we were just… hooking up.”

Nick stroked a thumb over your bottom lip, blowing a soft breath of laughter out of his nose. “Baby, I’m almost embarrassingly in love with you.”

“I didn’t know. You never… I didn’t know.”

“I guess I could have been clearer. But I thought when we started actually going on dates…” Nick trailed off, cheeks flushing.

You groaned and dropped your forehead to his chest. “You know damn well people now go on dates and have sex casually. How was I supposed to know we were serious? I thought we were friends who hung out all the time and then had sex.”

“Yeah, my love, that’s what dating is.” A beautiful laugh bubbled out of Nick, a bit watery from his crying, but still so lovely and bright.

“Okay, well, that makes it a lot easier to turn Curtis down.”

“I may not like that he went after my boyfriend, but without him, you may have just assumed we were platonic best friends who kiss for the rest of our lives. Our grandchildren gather round to hear our love story and you’re like ‘he’s just my friend, he doesn’t like me like that.’”

You raised your head and grinned wickedly. “Grandchildren?”

Nick smiled back, soft and glowing. “Oh yeah, we’re ride or die besties. May as well go in on one headstone, purely for financial purposes. And one last name too. Again, for financial purposes.”

“You proposing?” Just joking about it made your stomach do several backflips.

“Nah, not yet. We have to at least buy our own house first.”

You chuckled. “Hey.”

“Hm?”

“I’m embarrassingly in love with you too.”

You settled back onto Nick’s chest, resuming your skimming of his stomach, listening intently to Nick’s heart race. Despite having been in this exact position ten minutes prior, you felt lighter now, none of the trepidation and insecurity remaining.

Nick wanted you — loved you — as so much more than a friend with benefits, and you had never been happier.

[fipindustries]

the first lesson

"belief" chuckled the old man as he turned a delicate glass that contained some opulent limonchello "let me tell you something about how wizards trade in belief"

he was bald, with wild curly hair growing to the sides like the branches of a bonsai tree. he was also rather fat, not in a way that made him look flabby but rather round as a whole. his body could be easily drawn as a circle from which his head poked out, if some leeway for stylization were allowed to the artist. he wore a dark suit and dark round glasses as well as a simple goatee.

"do you lock your doors at night with a key?"

"uh... yes, teacher"

sitting in the small round table at the bar, across from him, was his student. a nervous lady, taller than him and far thinner, with a suit similar to his, dark and antiquated. they looked like undertakers. maybe they even were.

"wise thing to do, given your residence"

The student pursed her lips at this but made no comment. for reasons she could not understand her teacher was fond of making fun or criticizing her economic situation. and for sure there was a lot to complain about, she would do as much regularly, but her teacher seemed to be weirdly fixated on this. he would drop comments about it, cheerfully and casually and she would not respond to any of them and little by little the grains of sand would keep accumulating in the back of her head.

"so every night, before you sleep, you lock the front door of your room with a key, you put the key in the locke and you turn it once, and then twice, and you make a habit out of this, so much so that you do it unconciously, it is an automatic gesture with no thought put into it at all. you dont think to yourself 'now the door is locked', is just a truth of the universe, unacknowledged and yet all the same internalized"

"is this a story or is this your speculations about my life?"

"everything is a story if it's not meant to be literally true, maybe it is true, but that is not my intention"

"very well continue, teacher"

"so the next day, when you wake up and need to step out into the world, before doing that you unlock the door. now this is very important, you don't have to take a few moments to collect yourself and wonder if wether you locked your door last night, you dont have to take stock of your memories and recall that indeed you put the key there before going to sleep and locked the door tight, you just unlock the door because it is a deeply accepted truth that the door is simply locked"

"and the only way to unlock it is with a key"

"the only way indeed! very good!"

she didnt need to add that comment, and if it had been simply up to her whim she would have remained silent and let the man continue his lecture. but she had learned that her teacher enjoyed these interjections, however superfluous they might be, he always recieved them with joy and enthusiasm, as if she had solved a mystery or shown a deep insight. this was another of his weird quirks that she entertained simply because they seemed to make her interactions with him more frictionless.

"and now," he continued "imagine one day you go to a party and drink copious ammounts of alcohol, quantities large enough to make you dispossesed of your wits, not that i suggest you would actually do such a thing, at least not on the regular" the teacher gave her an unwanted wink "so your friends carry you back home and you stumble your steps up to your front door and once inside you are so out of sorts that you simply forget to lock the door, after which you fall into your bed and go to sleep"

"is this something about how my compromised state makes me believe for one night that ill be safe even though i havent locked the door or something?"

"not at all, you sleep soundly all night without being attacked, who knows, maybe burglars and robbers were busy in other houses or other parties, getting themselves merry and drunk, whatever the case may be you wake up the next day with no memory of last night, with quite a hangover, sadly there are no pills or medicines that can aid you with your malady at your home, so you will have to go to the corner drugstore to get something to let you handle your headache"

the student pursed her lips once again. there was a drugstore at the corner of her street, so this story not being about her seemed just a fraction less likely, but then again, there were drugstores at the corners of many streets.

"so you unlock your door and step outside, it's a lovely day with the birds singing and the sun shining and you go to the farmacy and buy the medicine you need to handle your hangover, end of the story"

"but how could i have unlocked the door if the door was already unlocked?" she said mechanically, knowing that this was the obvious question the story was baiting.

"exactly! very good my student!"

an overstated praise for a trite question. maybe her teacher just enjoyed being humored.

"for you see, to you it was not a matter of assuring yourself that the door was locked, to you it was simply a truth of the world, as profound and unquestionable as that things fall down"

"i see, and that is the level of belief i have to master in order to do magic?"

"more or less, yes" said the teacher sipping the limonchello.

"seems difficult to achieve without extensive use of manipulation, doublethink, brainwashing or psychodelics"

"hmm? what do you mean?"

"that...to internalize a belief that profoundly, seems hard to do without a lot of mental effort, without a rather strong amount of self deception and psychological trickery"

"i really dont know what you're talking about, you just have to believe, is the easiest thing in the world"

"it's... not, it's very much not, to believe, to truly believe, to actually thoroughly change one's mind about the nature of reality, against proof, against evidence is basically impossible"

"is that what you believe?"

"is-" oh, that was the trick. she had to internally stifle a groan. her teacher had pulled another of his dumb rethorical tricks. he seemed to be just as delighted when she failed to catch on as he was when she stated the obvious.

"that is the first belief you have to change, indeed is the first belief that all wizards have to change when they start" he said, chuckling again.

"that is the first spell that every wizard casts" she said, completing the thought.

"now" said the teacher, pulling out a small box with a large lock on it from his cape. he placed it on the small table, in the middle of the glasses, and then he pulled a key from a pocket. he put the key on the lock and turned once, and twice. then he put the key back into his pocket. "i want you to open this box"

the student looked at the box. so that was her challenge, to find the way to believe in her heart of hearts that this locked box was actually open. no, not even believe in hear heart of hearts, not even to know, really. this had to be something that trascended awareness.

she took a big gulp from her beer. she was going to fail the test so she wanted to steel herself to be embarassed.

obviously it was impossible for her to rewrite her brain right there and then and she was not even going to try. there was going to be no clapping while saying that she believed in fairies. that was just not how actual beliefs about the world were formed.

if it was a trick that all wizards had to master, she didnt have the instruction or the tools for how to do it. she looked at the box a little more. her hands hovered over it, hesitating. the moment she placed her hands on it and failed to open it, the test would be done and she would have failed and the was no circumventing that. she just wanted to delay the pie to her face a little longer.

of course, because she was her, she couldnt help but actually pause and still try her best to find the answer to the conundrum. she covered her mouth with one hand and scratched her mane of curls around her head with the other, like she did whenever she was deep in thought. her brow deeply furrowed with concentration.

And then she realized the true nature of her test. how dissapointing. it was a dumb trick of course. she placed a finger on top of the box and said "abracadabra"

She then opened the box.

"marvelous! marvelous! exceptional! very good my student! not even i did better than that when i was faced with the test!" exclaimed the teacher while clapping enthusiastically.

She was well and truly tired of her master's condescention.

"you didnt lock the box when you put the key in, you unlocked it" she said, rolling her eyes "the box was unlocked all along"

"exactly! precisely! the box was unlocked all along, just like the door in my story was locked all along!"

"no! no that is not the same thing!" insisted the student banging the table with her fist "in your story, someone believing that a door is locked changes reality retroactively to make it so that the door was always locked, but in my case the box was actually unlocked all along!" the ruckus made one of the waiters show up with a confused look in his face

"well yes, that is the point, that is what changing reality retroactively is supposed to look like, like it was unlocked all along" the teacher turned towards the waiter "thanks for showing up, what is the cost of these beverages, garçon?"

"that would be 30 in total"

"ah! very well, now you see i am a magician, so allow me a bit of flair" said the master waving his hands around in a very theatrical way "your fee is inside that box being held by my lovely assistant, my dear girl would you hand the box to our waiter?"

She rolled her eyes and gave the box to the poor confused man. who grabbed it and tried to pry it open. but he couldn't.

"um... is the box closed?" asked the waiter, out of sorts.

"oh? it should be opened, try again" said the old man.

the waiter struggled a little more but he could not open the box in any way. finally he turned to the teacher with forlorn expression.

"i give up, what's the trick?"

the old man reached behind the waiter's left ear and pulled out the key.

"here why dont you try with this"

"that is a really old trick" said the waiter while he unlocked the box and pulled out the money from inside it. he returned the box by forcefully pressing it against the old man's chest.

"what i nice lad!" said the teacher, while putting the key into the lock again and turning it once and then twice again. "anyway, where were we?"

the girl was just looking at he teacher, a mix of confusion, annoyance and a little bit of fear on her face.

"ok, how did you do that" she asked.

"i didnt do anything, you did, you opened the box"

"no, that... that was a trick, the lock is a clever mechanism or something"

"you are thinking like a magician, and i am asking you to think like a wizard, you opened this box, my dear girl, because you believed that it was opened, you already did this trick once, now all you have to do" said the man, placing the box back into the table "is do it again"

she hesitated.

"this is still a trick, right? you rigged it somehow so that if i try ill be able to open the box?"

the teacher laid back on the chair, very satisfied with himself. he crossed his fingers over his belly. she somehow felt that this, out of everything he had done that night, was his most sincere display of pride in her.

"what do you believe?" he said

she reached for the box.