#i was hit by this image while washing the dishes and i had to put into words

[princessmadelines]

i think it would have been really cool if supernatural had used a heavy classic hollywood three point lighting on angels, especially in s4-5 where the overall image is often dark. a strong backlight creating a natural halo around their hair, the absence of shadows on the face that makes the skin almost ethereal, the unnatural glimmer in the eyes — not only it would have given an eerie feeling to them compared to the humans, but framing them in a ‘classic’ way would have given them an ‘out of time’ feel that is characterising of angels, especially early on

[infranuz]

ii. a kiss for u ig || snap out of it

“arisu, don’t you think it’s a bit too early to start the day? It’s barely 8” you groaned as your brother woke you up to get ready for the long day ahead of you. if you were to be honest you were starting to regret dragging kuina and chishiya all day yesterday and coming home so late. but hey, you got to hang out with them for a while.

“not even, usagi wakes up earlier than you and she doesn’t complain” arisu was all ready to go but you could tell he still needed some sleep. “and how would you know that huh?” he stopped dead in his tracks after hearing your words “because.. she told me, yeah, you know the other day she came over” even he sounded unsure of his words.

he quickly changed the topic avoiding your question “anyway, what did you do yesterday since you came home at 1 am..” he walked back to the dining room, setting down a plate on the table for cereal. “not this again, i get it. I need to get home earlier because of how dangerous it is out there, blah blah” you heard it all from yesterday's lecture he gave you about being out so late at night. 

“[name], I’m actually asking what you did yesterday..” he stared at you confused “oh.. well, we went to cafes, malls, specially the ones with bookstores in them, chishiya bought me some books as a welcome back gift” you smiled recalling the events from last night.

“so chishiya was the one that brought you” he could barely be heard as he crunched on his cereal. “yeah, man i should’ve taken a picture of him with his mittens” arisu suddenly spit out his cereal laughing. “YOU GAVE HIM THE MITTENS?!?” arisu giggled at the sudden image that popped up in his head

you could only laugh with him as he almost choked on his left over cereal in his mouth. conversation went smoothly after his little outburst of laughter, “are you done eating? usagi and karube said they’ll meet us at the park” arisu got up from his spot going to place his used plate on the sink to wash later.

or more like for you to wash later since he’ll normally forget and leave you to do the dishes.. “yeah I’m all done here, let’s go then I want to get back early” and truly you did, there was still some studying you had to do for an upcoming final you had for your classes. 

arisu nodded his head and grabbed your apartment keys along with a small bag, a present that you helped him pick out for usagi. it was just a simple $100 perfume that she had been wanting for the longest of time. 

you took the lead in walking out first, the sun's light immediately hitting your face. arisu took his time walking out and closing the door making sure it was locked. “this is why we need a car, sometimes I hate walking..” you silently whined, your legs still hurt from yesterday, sadly you would have to deal with it.

“well can you pay for one?” arisu looked at you with a mocking grin “shut up” you glared at him turning away. he laughed and turned his head forward once again. 

for a couple of minutes it was silent as both of you stepped into the city’s busy streets. sometimes it was kind of overwhelming to be around so many people, yet, knowing your brother was right beside you lessened the feeling a bit. arisu knew this so he handed you his headphones to cancel out all the noise surrounding you. you silently thanked him, taking them and putting them on.

all the peoples talking voices were eventually drowned out by your music “omg by new jeans again?, don’t you get tired of listening to them over and over again..” arisu peeked over at your phone to see what song you played, thankfully you couldn’t hear him so you only gave him a confused look pointing to the headphones.

he realized his mistake and laughed dismissing his question, before you knew it both of you had arrived at the park where you both quickly spotted karube and usagi having a conversation. you could see how usagi turned her head when karube pointed both of you out. 

you took off your headphones as you both approached them, the loud city’s noises were no longer audible. “arisu, name!” karube got between you two and hugged you both with a big smile on his face. you giggled, he would always do this when he had the chance. “hi karube” truly it had been so long since you had last seen the blond man. 

you turned to usagi, which correction was a bad idea because now you had to see arisus horrible attempt at flirting. you pushed him away as you greeted usagi “USAGII” you launched yourself at her, “name!!” she opened her arms wide to receive the hug 

arisu looked at you in disbelief and betrayal to which you stuck out your tongue to him. as you got off of her karube spoke up “so.. where are we going first??” he looked eager to start the day. “well first.. the movie that starts at 10, then we can walk around the plaza near there and lastly dinner..” arisu said as he recalled the plan.

“well then let’s get going, it's almost 10” usagi said as she showed you the time from her phone. great!! more walking.. you cursed at whoever decided to build the cinema so close yet so far from where you were. thankfully, karube noticed and offered to give you a piggyback ride, of course you didn’t refuse. 

not once did he complain through the walk, at some point you got comfortable enough to lay your head on his shoulder, slowly taking in his scent. a small hint of cigarettes and alcohol mixed with cologne was noted. still he did smell pretty good, in fact, it could probably put you to a peaceful sleep if it wasn’t for you fighting to stay awake. 

fortunately (for you at least) it was all in vain since you did end up falling asleep. arisu sighted in defeat when he caught sight of your sleeping figure. once again fortunately, you missed the movie thanks to your deep slumber,  truthfully you didn’t want to watch it either way. 

the only reason why arisu had even picked it was for usagi to get scared and cling on to him. really cliche right? point is by the time you awoke they were already walking by the plaza. karube was still carrying you on his back. 

“good morning [name]” karube spoke up as he felt your head lift from his shoulder and move to the side. “what time is it? I didn’t mean to fall asleep..""oh i don’t know maybe about 2 hours!?!” arisu glared at you “oh well, my bad but in my defense I came back home late and slept around 3 am..” you did stay up 2 more hours after getting home for educational purposes; studying. 

“im kind of thirsty, can we get drinks?” you could tell they had been walking for a couple of minutes now. “im also thirsty, but where can we find a-” usagi stopped her sentence as she spotted a small convenience store. “I’m sure we’ll find something there” arisu pointed out. 

“if you guys want, me and arisu can go get the drinks while you stay here, we won’t be gone too long” usagi turned to both you and karube. you looked over to arisu who now looked nervous, just to tease him you accepted her offer, his eyes immediately landed on you with a slight glare. you gave him your teasing smirk as they both slowly turned around and walked towards the store. 

“you can put me down now karube, thank you for the ride.” you tapped his shoulder to catch his attention. “yeah of course, anytime, you seriously looked like you needed it” he chucked, “yeah, I barely slept 6 hours when I normally get 8..” it may not sound like a lot for many but you truly needed those 2 extra hours.. he slowly put you down making sure you landed on your feet safely.

karube hummed, a second later a sudden question pops up “so, my kiss?” karube smirked at you, who only stared back at him surprised. you let out a chuckle with a smile that had appeared. you had jokingly offered a kiss to chota the day before to which he rejected and now karube wanted to take his place instead and as silly as he is he sounded serious dead serious.

you sighted in defeat “a kiss for you i guess, but only because you gave me that piggyback ride” you reach for karube’s face to bring it down to your own height as your lips land on his left cheek. you slowly stepped back and looked up to him. “i’ll take that as a win for today then” he smiled as he placed his hand over your head. 

you could feel your face getting warmer from that small interaction “dont get used to it..” right on queue arisu and usagi came back with 4 drinks on their hands. “a strawberry for [name] and a mango for karube” usagi mentioned so arisu could hand you your proper drinks. you thanked usagi since she knew what flavor you wanted exactly.

“lastly we have dinner, we can just go to some fast food place around here..” arisu checked his phone to search for any possible places you guys could walk to. karube suddenly nudged your shoulder to get your attention on him, “do you like sanrio?” you stared at him confused for the sudden question yet still answered “yeah, why?”.

without a word he took your hand and walked you to a nearby stand where you could take a notice of.. bouquets? but not just any type of bouquets, they were sanrio themed ones. those bouquets you would always see on Instagram or any social media for that matter. while you zoned out you were quickly brought back by karube as he handed you a cinnamoroll bouquet. 

a pretty baby blue color that matched your current outfit. “arisu mentioned you liked that show once ” karube said as he looked away with evident pink cheeks. this time it was your turn to speak but you felt as if no words could come out, as if your throat was drier than a dessert even after just having an ice cold drink. if you were to speak now you would only stutter like a fool. 

“thank you karube..” it was all you could let out as you turned back to arisu and usagi with the blond following behind you. while it was horribly awkward on your part, you seriously couldn’t find the right words to describe how you were feeling. your heart was beating so fast you could practically have a heart attack right then and there. 

your head turned back to karube, he was staring right at you before immediately turning his head the other way trying to make it seem like he was just looking around. this gave you the confidence to calm down from your flustered state as you giggled and clinged to his arm.

arisu and usagi only stared at the two of you not wanting to interrupt your little moment so they only walked ahead in the direction of whatever restaurant they had chosen.

maybe today wasn’t as bad as you planned it to be after all.

— IM SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO PUT THIS CHAPTER OUT.. my tumblr kept glitching for some reason.. I thought I was abt to loose all my progress at some point thankfully I didn’t. hopefully there are no mistakes, I reread it like 10 times.. + i hope it is to your liking, it’s almost 2k words I think.. sorry for so many words😭 I appreciate all the support I’ve been getting🫶🏼 I look forward to working on more chapters for this smau!! ps. I swear I will bring chishiya scenes soon <3

tags!! ,, tags!! ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝!! | if highlighted purple tag doesn’t work💔

@parkersmyth . @surshica . @spaceshattered-skies . @rainqissedd . @saltysoftgrungeofscience . @captivq . @vernon-dursley . @fishisahappydog . @trinmadol . @elernity . @naegisimp . @4vonly . @sincerely-raine . @yvrikoo . @sicksanji

[yoonlattesworld]

Family

Main masterlist

Husband yoongi x wife reader one shot

❤You find yourself falling for him all over again just by watching him and your son in their own little bubble❤

Genre/warning: married au,husband yoongi, fluff, just some soft yoongi time 🥺, no warnings.

Taglist (open)♡

@rosquilleta @bunnyrhe @creatorspalace @shymagda-7 @raineandskye @yoonaasa @iheartsvt @xmochiloverx @kyojuro-ska @meow-min @kissme-ornot

Author's pov

Humming to yourself softly you rubbed your favorite lotion over your arms, sighing at the fragrance. Wearing a cardigan over your sleeveless top you looked at the time while drying your hair with the towel '9:15 pm' "will mira be asleep?" You mumbled to yourself walking out of the room and a soft smile immediately made its way to your lips when you found your 2 year old son playing on his play mate and crouched down in front of him "hey eunnie" the little boy immediately smiled his father's gummy smile at the sight of his mom and kissed your cheek "hi mama" you giggled and kissed his head whispering "I'll be right back yeah?" Eun nodded already too busy with making something with his blocks and you stood up walking in the kitchen where your husband, yoongi was washing the dishes and hugged his waist, pressing a small kiss on his jaw. He hummed smiling softly and pecked your forehead as you pulled back "yoon I'm just gonna give this cake to hari. Mira loves vanilla cake" you said putting some slices of your homemade cake in a container for your bestfriend's daughter while yoongi nodded, washing his hands "alright doll but don't start talking with her right now. I'm sure joon can't handle two gossiping woman after the long day he had" yoongi teased, smirking when you rolled your eyes and hit his chest mumbling "i don't know what you're talking about. We never gossip" "sure you don't angel" yoongi chuckled when you hit him again and eun gasped "mama are you hitting dada?" "No baby dadda's just being a meanie today" you smiled at eun and pouted at yoongi before opening the front door and walking towards your neighbor's door. "Hey y/n" namjoon smiled opening the door for you as your bestfriend walked out of the kitchen "i bought cake!" You both giggled as mira came running towards you with a large smile.

Yoongi placed the cloth down after wiping all the utensils and looked at the clock Chuckling raspily '9:46 pm' "sure you don't gossip doll" he mumbled smiling as he watched eun babbling and playing by himself when suddenly his smile widened "eunnie?" "Yes dadda?" "Wanna play with bubbles?" Eun's eyes widened with excitement as he nodded rapidly causing yoongi to chuckle as he saw an image of you buzzing with excitement. "C'mon then you" yoongi grunted picking his son up who giggled with excitement, wiggling in his arms mumbling to himself "bubbles bubbles bubbles". After the bathtub was filled with warm water he opened your drawer and took out a tangerine flavored bath bomb, giving it to eun "dadda look!" Eun yelled throwing the ball in the bathtub, laughing and jumping as the bath bomb dissolved in the water "it smells good doesn't it?" Yoongi grinned as he saw eun struggling to take of his clothes and helped him before taking off his own clothes.

You laughed along with hari and namjoon, while mira passed out on the couch after eating the cake and checked the time '10:10' your eyes widened and you said "i should get going now. Yoongi and eun must be waiting " namjoon nodded but hari whined hugging your arm "just sleep here and bring eun too!" You and namjoon chuckled as he pulled her back against his chest "i think you've had too much wine love" "I'll see you both later. Goodnight!" "goodnight!" Hari and namjoon said simultaneously as you waved and opened the door.

Locking the door behind you,you bite your lip not hearing anything "yoongi?" You whispered walking towards your shared bedroom and suddenly, small giggles and laughs hit your ears, causing you to smile to yourself as you followed the sound which led you to the bathroom whose door was half way opened. The sight in front of you caused your eyes to go soft as you leaned against the doorframe carefully as to not make any noise. Yoongi was sitting in the bathtub with eun on his lap as they both played with bubbles, laughing and giggling together. You bite your lips,feeling yourself falling for this man all over again. You smiled as eun laughed loudly when some of the water fell out of the bathtub because of how much he was jumping on yoongi's lap. God you felt like you were the luckiest girl Alive to have such a wonderful family. Him as your husband, and eun as your son. Feeling your eyes getting misty,you softly placed a hand over your still flat stomach, watching how gently and lovingly yoongi played with your son.

Sniffling softly, your eyes widened slightly when yoongi suddenly looked at you,his lips parting when he noticed your teary eyes, but soon his eyes softened when he noticed your smile,full of love. You nibbled your bottom lip as his gaze traveled down to where your hand was. His eyes full of confusion at first before they widened and he looked at you. A soft chuckle leaving his lips when you nodded , whispering "i love you" his own eyes getting teary as eun noticed you standing there and yelled "mama! Come here and look at the bubbles!" You giggled nodding and wiped your tears, crouching in front of the bathtub as yoongi held your hand tightly and securely, squeezing it three times and you squeezed it back four times, as he kissed your forehead, watching you both fondly as eun put some of the foam on your nose,giggling.

You'll never know how lucky he feels, to have a family with you. Because words couldn't describe the overwhelming love his was feeling for his little family. His whole world.

[jaewrotethis]

4- Sleep...

Tuesday

I sit up in bed holding my hurting sides, glancing at the time. 5:13am. I cautiously get out of bed, lifting my shirt and seeing the angry bruises looking worse than yesterday. I’m careful to put on pants. Without brushing my teeth or hair I race, best I can, from the apartment to the newspaper stand down the street. I snatch at one running away before being shouted at to pay for it. I sprint all the way back to the complex, shaking anxiously while I ride the elevator up. I run back to my apartment when the elevator doors part and I don’t stop until I’ve locked my bedroom door behind me.

My entire torso shouts angrily at me for running but I ignore the pain and I rip at the paper, searching for anything on recent murders again. I look for a name, his face, a story but find nothing. I spend hours reading through it over and over. Nothing. Mother didn’t ever walk into my room, even when she got home that evening. I longed all day to go back to sleep. I felt guilty. Every breath felt like a sin. I took a man’s life and here I lay in bed all day long. Exhausted I stay in bed, guilt depriving me of sleep. The dreams I’ve had the passed two days have me wishing I could back. Those dreams are my only peace from the uninterrupted pain and the heavy burden of guilt. The bruises on my neck are clearing up a little bit and my black eye is just beginning to recover. But the thick layer of purple and green still taint my torso. I grow frustrated unable to find anything about the man and I give up rereading the paper.

----- ----- ------ ------ ----- ------ ------ ----- -------- ------ ------

Mother is shouting at me from behind my closed door.

“Jane! Be back late!” Then the front door slams shut.

How did she know we’re here?

I shrug getting up. I now have the apartment to myself for the rest of the night. I’m a nervous wreck. I miss sleep. I miss that feeling of flying. I need to go back to that place that replaced my nightmares. That place that gave me peace and faith for the short time I was there. But mostly I can’t get the bloody images and guilt of taking life to leave me alone. The dream is a distraction from the man with his brains on the cement. But the distraction only worked so well, I know if I can just fall asleep again and dream then all the stress and nerves that are wrecking my insides will be gone. The only problem is that anxiety made it impossible to calm down enough to fall asleep.

So I tiptoe out of my room quietly. I use the bathroom for the first time today and find myself something to eat. I take my time eating, enjoying the quiet apartment. When I finish, I wash my dishes and walk around the apartment turning off all the lights and lock the door, with all the windows. I head back to my room and lay down to sleep, but like the night before, and all day, sleep is absent. I get out of bed again, leaving only my lamp on, and I peek my head down the hallway with an idea. The risky part.

I silently run into Mother’s room. I haven’t been in here since we got the place, but I know where they are. My target is her nightstand drawer. I don’t know if it’s trust issues, or I’m just extra cautious but I’m too frightened to be loud or turn on the lights. I feel for her nightstand in the dark and pull open the drawer once I find it. I slide my hand inside and feel everything slowly, searching for the little white bottle.

When I locate it, I scoop it up and push the cap down quickly. I don’t want to be in here longer than I need to. The lid pops open. Little blue capsules fly out all over. I freeze with the bottle in my hand while they bounce off the nightstand and fall onto the floor, making small ‘binks’ when each one hits the wood. Quickly, and fearfully, I drop to my knees feeling the carpet all over for the capsules. I snatch them up when I feel them and shove them back into the bottle. I’m on the floor maybe two minutes when I’m convinced I got them all. I stand with some in my hand and the bottle in my other. I smash the cap on and throw the bottle back into it’s place. Knocking the drawer shut, I bolt out of the room with my fist full of pills, slamming Mothers door behind me.

I don’t stop running until I get to my room, slamming my door as well. In a series of maneuvers I flick on the light, lock my door, pick up a water bottle, grab my library book, and slide onto my bed crisscross. I open the book to the table of contents and stare at the pills in my palm.

Should be enough.

I separate three. I toss them into my mouth and gulp down water, moving my eyes over to the clock. Nearly 10pm. I sit there thinking and counting the leftover pills. There’s four. I touch the itchy cuts through my sleeve. They’ve turned purple since the other day. I put down the remaining four pills on my blanket and turn my attention to the thick book in front of me, though I don’t know exactly what I’m looking for.

I read through the table of contents, stopping when a title of a chapter catches my eye. It’s labeled ‘Lucid Dreaming’. I flip to the chapter reading every word intensely and I couldn’t stop once I started. It was about steps to manipulating dreams. A technique used to control dreams, to be aware of the fact that the brain is sleeping, and the body has shut down. I read the entire chapter and a little bit of the next one before I begin growing tired. I got the basics of how it works and I’m eager to try it. I need to lie flat and still for as long as I can. I need to ignore itches and any urges to move. After some time, I should slip into sleep and feel some sort of weight pushing down on my check. Eventually, I should reach the REM cycle and that’s where dreams happen. If it works I’ll be aware that I am sleeping and be able to control my dream. And when that happens, I’m going straight back to that land.

I close the book, setting it aside. I snatch the pills off the blanket and put them on the nightstand in a small pile. I throw all my blankets to the floor along with my pillow.

Remember to breathe.

“I do not need your help right now,” I say to my empty room as I position myself flatly on the bed.

I stay there, staring at the ceiling, my arms at my sides. I stay there feeling restless but my eyes burn to stay shut for a moment. I let them close and the room completely flips over onto its side. The entire walls rolling my room over, throwing all my belongings and furniture into the air. I hit the wall furthest to me on my left, gasping out on impact.

I sit up in my bed, yelling out from fear, then again, but this time in hot white pain. I grab my sides, a painful moan dragging in my throat. Eyes wide open looking at my dark bedroom walls. Nothing’s changed. Nothing is out of place. I look at the clock 12:16pm.

Irritated now, I yank the chain of my lamp. I blind myself, just causing stronger irritation. The backs of my eyes burn and ache from the light as I separate two more pills from the pile, blinking angrily. No second thought, no third thought, no second voice chiming in. I pop them into my mouth and swallow hard. I’m craving to be anywhere else but in this room, in this apartment, in this city. I can’t wait for another moment to fly over that island. My eyes hover closed and I practice the slow breathing from the book to slow my heart rate. This helps the brain fall into sleep.

After about ten breathes the room drops down. My bed hits the ground a whole floor beneath my apartment. I slam into my mattress when the legs of the bed break the floor boards. Again I shout out from fear, but this time I don’t feel the aching throbs in my ribs. My head vibrates when I look to the walls again. The scare didn’t send me upward into a sitting position, no, this time I still lie flat. I don’t feel my arms or legs. I look to my body, and try lifting my right arm. Nothing moves. My vision fades black, over and over, in and out, I fail to grasp full consciousness. The panic struck me then. I scream out, calling for help. But my voice makes no sound, in fact I didn’t even phase. My brain tells my arms to reach up and bang on the wall for someone to hear me. But my arms still just lie.

One at a time, one at a time. I tell myself.

I tell my fingers to move. Again and again, I tell my fingers to grab the bed. I tell my voice to scream out, cry out for help, but only small airy groans fail to be any louder than my own earshot. The panic is building around my heart. It’s getting hot, and I’m getting faster and faster at screaming at my body parts. I’m trying and trying to wake up, trying to disturb my sleeping body but the only progress being made is the panic about to explode. It’s getting too hot. I’m hyperventilating. I yank myself from the sleep. Mentally, I pull up away from the dark sleep and into the cold of my bedroom. My eyes finally snap open, my heart forcing out gasp after gasp of fearful dread. Then I sit, groaning over my numb arms, moaning from the throbs in my ribs. I touch my face, my shoulders, my neck, my legs, and of course, my sides. I’ve never felt this before. The control of my limbs again brings gratitude, but the numbing ripples that are tearing through my skin take it away.

“Fuck,” I shiver out a whisper, still groaning and gasping.

I look over to the two pills left on my nightstand.

What does it take to sleep through the night?

I scoot up to the head board and grab the remaining pills in the dark. I look up to my window. My twin stands there in the dark. She doesn’t say anything, just adds to my jump scare. I put the pills on my tongue and take another really hard swallow. I lay down, afraid of waking up like that again. It was a possible side effect of the attempt to Lucid Dream. Being stuck, awake, while my body slept was a sleep paralysis I never want to feel again. It takes longer to fall back asleep this time. Minutes and minutes pass by.

Itches came, I forces myself to ignore. More minutes and my muscles want to twitch and move but I refuse. I resist the urge to bend my knee or twist my neck. I rebel against the need to shift onto my side or turn over completely. I still didn’t see it coming, The drowsiness grows intensely, but unconscious had a tight enough hold to keep the panic away. I feel pressure growing inside of me. I feel lost in the blackness when my eyes refuse to open. My mind falls down into a tired sensation that feels too much like the paralysis. I want to scream again. I feel the fear now. It’s rising up. I feel the fear as if it’s physical. It hits me hard. I wake up completely from the trance. I’m in a cold sweat. Something’s wrong.

Why am I sweating?

I groan out loud as a strong, thick, sick feeling hits me harder each second I wake more.

God, what hurts so badly? The voice of my twin practically yells.

My insides ache. My stomach churning, I gag and feel hot foam in my throat. The back of my tongue chocks me. I begin panting, trying to push away this sickening feeling. My eyes going to the clock as I swing my feet off the bed. 2:47pm.

What’s happening?

I feel anger. My hopes of reaching the land I dreamed of are shattered. I shake feeling like my stomach is collapsing in on itself. My head swims with a sickness similar to car sickness but stronger and more penetrating. I’m confused, sick, and angry.

We’re dying. She groans, taking it harder than I am.

My eyes are barely open. My lenses don’t focus. Zero energy and my body trying to reject a substance that’s been mixed in my system for hours. Making noises of pain and disgust, I struggle to my feet, my vision dim and blurry. Oh, so blurry. I can’t ease my breathing, and moving only makes it harder.

What’s happening? Why is this happening? We’re dying. Why are we dying?!

“Sh-shut up-!” I try quieting the girl who’s pushing me into panic but a loud gag interrupts me and I vomit all down my chest.

My head buzzes, I can’t exactly feel the rest of my body, just a numbing vibration of limbs. Somehow, I make it to the bathroom. I fall in front of the toilet and jerk my hair back. My lips apart and I shake, trying to relax my insides the best I can. I cough, gag, and burp in a fever like stage. My swallow hard as my mouth salivates and the warm sickness hugs my throat. It erupts from my stomach, missing the toilet. It wakes me up a little more and increases the dizziness when it spills onto the floor. I close my eyes and look away from it, moaning. It comes out violent four times before I loose count.

I stop puking my guts out for a minute when I start dry heaving. Trying to control the tremors going through my body, I reach up yo flush the toilet. My hands slippery with vomit excess. I can’t grasp the handle and give up dropping my arm. I wipe my mouth, using my other arm to hold myself up on the seat of the toilet. I attempt to stand. I weakly get to my feet feeling like I just threw up the life in me. I get a glimpse of the mirror. My face looks pale. Dark bags under my eyes. My lips are trembling. My body being thrown forward and backward. I have little control over myself, only really focused on the pain in my stomach. The drowsiness is mixed with the constant sway of my world. I can’t see straight at all. I clutch my stomach, shaking so hard it hurts. I glance at the floor behind me that I can see in the mirror. The girl who is me sits with her back to the wall and her legs spread out flat. Her head is down, her hair in her face. She’s out cold. I try hard to steady m sight, to calm my moving brain. My vision begins to spin. Everything in sight begins moving I no longer have control over anything I do. My spine fails and my head falls. My entire consciousness is taken away before I hit the floor.

Thursday

I’m in my head. Asleep. Dreaming. I’m at the free land I’ve been trying to get to all night. I made it. Only this time it isn’t peaceful. This time I don’t feel unstoppable and energetic. I’m flying through the air over the ocean as usual. The wonderful island is on cue to come up over the horizon any second, and when it does my heart shudders. Instead of seeing green lands, with healthy mountains ranges and clear waterfalls, I see a red sun. Fire blooms on all along the beach. The once green mountains are burnt black.

Creatures run about in terror as I near the shore. Other beings, thick big ones, are chasing the smaller ones. They are chasing, catching, and killing. Right before my misty eyes I see one after the other get ripped apart by the bulky creatures. Some are on fire, running along the sand and screeching. The trees are set ablaze. The waterfalls are replaced with pouring fire, no animals are visible, only fear and terror in the air. I round the island going left instead of over it. I stay meters above the water. My speed falters. I lose air. I feel the happiness drain out of me. I feel the ability to fly leaving my body. I try pushing upward. I kick to stay lifted. I claw at the air but only sink. Stuttering up and down, using all the mental strength to stay in the air. But I come crashing down. Before I slam into the water my mind wonders to the boy in green. The one from the latest dreams.

Did he do this?

My body hits the water hard. I jolt awake. I went straight through the water onto my bed. Throwing my spine upward my eyes opening, a small cry escaping my mouth. I sit there in the dark room, waking up, catching my breath. I heave in the middle of my bed for about a minute, confused at where I am.

“Oh, shit.” I say boringly.

I look down at the white bed I lay on. White sheets, white pillow. A hospital bed. I sit in the dark clutching my shoulders. My thin white blankets is on the floor. My throat aches terribly. An IV sticks out og my wrist, multiple suction cups connected to machines by cord on my chest. A small white finger clip monitors my heart rate on my index finger. The machines around me beep. The clock on the wall in front of me is broken and doesn’t move. The door is to my left on the far side of the wall. To my right is a large window, taking up the majority of the wall.

Uh, we just woke up mid scream. Where’s a damn nurse?

Oh, good. She’s awake. I think, already annoyed with her.

Some pain killers would be wonderful right now. I mess with my hair a little bit, fingering through it. Ripping off the IV and suction cups, making the machines flat line. I take off the finger clip and lift myself feeling motion sick. Standing is difficult but I manage, giving myself a head rush. I reach for my blanket and feel sore along my sides still. I wrap the blanket around me with the ends in my fist. My mind wonders again, if whoever brought me here and put me in this paper gown saw the bruises.

Did mother find us?

Who else would’ve?

She’s gonna put us back!

I freeze at her comment. Mother will think I tried to kill myself. She’ll call Doctor Link and put me back in the asylum. I wrap the blanket around me to comfort myself but dread and fear make my stomach sick. I have no idea what time it is or when I’ll see Mother again. I walk to the door looking out the small window on it. A bright, white hallway and another door across. I put my hand on the cold knob and turn. It’s locked.

Of course, we’re locked up.

I roll my eyes annoyed with myself. The large window on the opposite wall has a tree top view. Branches and leaves of the top take up the entire window except for a small space in the corner. The city site in that corner, quiet and bright. The moonlight shines through the branches casting shadows on shadows on the floor and walls. The door opens. I flinch at the noise and when I turn back to the door, a nurse is walking in. Her hair up and messy, her eyes tired. She seemed to relax when she saw me and looks to the clipboard in her hand.

“Uhhh...Jaynessa...Saynes. Ah-oh...” her breath trails out with her voice and she looks back at me.

“Jane.” I saw walking back to the bed.

“You aren’t supposed to remove these,” she says while she picks up the six suctions cups I tore off my skin.

“Oops,” I sit on the bed and let her reattach them and stick the IV back in my vein.

“How are you feeling?” she asks me.

“Wonderful.”

“Sweetie, do you know why you’re here?”

Sweetie? Really?

“You overdosed on sleep medication. You were a comatose case. You’re very lucky to be alive.”

“So lucky,” I keep away from her eyes, I don’t even see what color they are.

“You know suicide isn’t a way out, sweetie.” She clips the monitor back onto my finger.

“It was an accident.” I say pulling my hand from hers.

She pulls her pen from her pocket and write on the paper I assume is on the clipboard. I watch, understanding she doesn’t believe me. She eyes the scabbing cuts on my arms and then pulls the stethoscope from her shoulders and places it on my chest telling me to breathe. She plays on the machines pressing buttons for a while then hands me a small cup. Inside are two green pills and a pink.

“The doctor is going to want to hear about this first thing when he gets here, I’m sure. He will explain everything to you in the morning. Are you in any pain?”

“What is it?” I ask with the cup up in the air.

“A dose of pain reliever and the pink one will help you sleep,”

“You want me to take, more sleeping pills,”

“I know you must be very uncomfortable, and maybe scared. But the doctor won’t be here until morning. If you’d like I can put it in your-”

“No, no it’s alright,” she had reached for my IV, and there is no need to go back to the horrid realm of sleep again.

I take the pills and swallow the water she hands me from the table next to the bed. The water tastes so good I want to ask her for more. I wait for her to grab my chin or ask me to open my mouth. She just smiles.

“Sleep well,”

“A bit hard with all the...cables” I tug lightly at them with a sad face on.

“Worry about resting, they tend to come off while patients sleep, it’s alright.” She smiles again and shuts the door behind her.

I don’t hear a lock. I wait to hear her footsteps walk away then I separate the pink pill alone from the back of my tongue. I suppose the time spent in the Bromley institution wasn’t a complete waste. I spit it out on my palm, swallowing the green pain killers.

I don’t want to sleep and go back to the fiery land, The fear and misery I felt was dreadful. The images and memory makes my skin crawl. I don’t understand how the wonderful, prideful, powerful land had burned and succumbed to chaos. I don’t get what changed in my mind to conjure such distressful suffrage.

Funny, ‘cause you spent the last day waiting to and dying to sleep...literally.

Day?

Idiot, her clipboard said it’s Thursday. Comatose case.

I think back a moment. When she leaned over me to grab my finger with the monitor clip., her clipboard was in m view. I saw the date.

August 22, 1966. Thursday, dumbass.

I look down considering why I didn’t remember that until this second, but the pink pill in my hand crashes that train of thought. I look around the room. There’s nowhere to put the pill. No bathroom. No trash. The window has a small opening at the top, but too high to reach even if it was open. I look over to the door. I close my fist to secure the pill then rip out the IV again. I take off the medical gear she placed on me. I get up and walk to the door, feeling an unsettling excitement when it opens. I step out into the cold hallway. It’s lit up very bright. The hospital gown provides no sense of warmth at all.

I jog down to the right until I reach the end of the hall, my feet slapping lightly against the quiet tile all the way down. At the end it divides into more hallways on both sides, a wall of windows placed in front of the hallway I just came from. I look down both way before stepping into the progressing hallway. At the end to the left I see a bathroom. On the end to my right the hall opens into a large waiting room. Turning on my heel I go left to the bathroom. I run to it swinging the door open. I listen. It’s really quiet. Only the wind sounding outside the building.

After I flush the pill I walk down the hall to the large waiting room on the other end. I stare out the line of windows as I make my way down. The city is lit up, and polluting the invisible stars above. I look below, estimating about 15 floors beneath me. I enter the large waiting room that is dark. No lights light it up, only the seeping light that crawls on the floor from the lit hallway I came from. The room is carpeted that my cold feet are grateful to. Cushioned chairs and couches with coffee tables are planted about the room. There is a door to the right that probably goes up. The wall directly in front of the entrance that I just walked through is one large window. No wall at all, just window. I walk to it hugging myself but placing a hand on the cool glass when I reach it.

Below me traffic flows. I lean my forehead on the cold window looking. I wonder if I can make it to the roof. I don’t like feeling trapped in this building. The view from this window is bigger than the one in the hallway. I can see towers and buildings stretch for miles and miles. I gaze down at the traffic lights, the cars, neon signs, and loud people. I search for trees.

The only trees in any urban city are potted in cement and destroyed when they get too big. I stand there shivering in the paper gown and holding one shoulder in my hand. Behind me the lights flicker off. All of them gone black. I look up and around me. The hallways are almost pitch black. The windows on the wall shed blue light. The waiting room now darker than before. My fingers still on the glass, I scan the area. I step away from the window, my fingers leaving cold prints on the glass. The window behind me, light from the window casting my shadow on the floor in front of me. Then I see it again.

The shadow of a person that isn’t me. Or the spirit that I haven’t thought about since the man was on top of me in the alley. Its head comes up slowly on the floor in front of me, It’s behind me. I whip around and see it. It’s floating on the air behind the glass. I freeze feeling as if all the cold air in the room instantly absorbed into my flesh. It throws its palms on the glass slamming it. The loud bang is like a slap to my nerves and I jump gasping, running for the hallway I came from. I run through the hall lined with windows and the shadow follows me from behind the glass. It stops abruptly when I turn the corner down to the hall that hold my door. I book it down the hall in the dark. My arms outstretched I grab the door as I run into it, looking back for one second, I see it pressed against the window all the way down the hall. It’s clawing and kicking at the window, banging it so loudly, it rings off the walls.

Is anyone hearing this?! Where is everyone?

“Shut up right now!” I half yell out.

The spirit hit the window again and I bolt into my room, shutting the door with a hard slam. I hold my hands to the wood. It was a horrid looking, almost demon-like, creature. It was a terrifying dark demon. My heart racing, my lungs breathing, my back to the door now. I’m gasping for comprehension of what I saw.

What the fuck? Jane, what the fuck! What’s happening?

Calm down.

I wasn’t panicking until she started speaking in my head. She rattled off in my head and forces me to feel more than I’m capable of.

What is that thing? It’s true, Jane, we’re crazy. We are really, crazy? Mother was right. We’re insane! She’s hysterical now, sharing her fear with me.

“Shut up!” I shout out loud again, grabbing my hair. The harder I pull the more she dims out.

They’re gonna put us in the chair. We’re gonna be fried, alive!

She’s making more and more sense, and I begin to picture the next short weeks of my life, before they soap that sponge on my scalp. I feel the water from the thought spill down my neck and shout out, jumping away from door. I grab at my neck like something bit me.

“Calm-calm down...it’s the meds..”

The meds are messing with me. I tell myself.

I touch my sides, feeling for the bruises. The damaged skin sores tickled me numbingly when I grazed my hands over them. The medication had defiantly kicked in.

It’s the medication...or maybe I’m still asleep.

Mother’s going to tell Doctor Link, and she’s going to test more treatments on us!

I’m asleep still, it isn’t real right now… I’m seeing the flashbacks now, about to sink into a panic attack.

Then when she’s through with us…I see my malnourished gray skin, chapped lips, dark eyes, missing hair, bones, from the reflection of the glass, of the testing room they used for us.

She’ll hand us over to the police...where they’ll-

“Stop!” A memory of seeing the girls in my dorm snatched away and pinned down to be devoured hits me in the face. I grab at my eyes, crying now.

And you know what comes last. They’re going to fucking fry us!

“Shut up! It’s not real! It isn’t real. It’s not real. I’m ok, I’m ok,” I hit the wall with nearly each word, screaming out tears and anger.

Stop kidding yourself. She’s suddenly calm. You are not sane you never were.

I sink to the floor, gasping. I look to the window on the other side of the bed in front of me. I whisper ‘shut up’ at the voice as I stare through the kaleidoscope of gray shadows that cover the room. Anxiety crawling up my spine like a spider. The tree scrapes against the window like in horror movies.

You’re not dreaming either. You know you’re not. You’re insane and pushing it down will only feed the fear, the shame, the regret-

A flash of the man’s blood on my fingers slips in front of my eyes.

“Shut up.” I say louder.

Accept your insanity if you want the panic attacks to back off. Be glad we’re the ones with open eyes. The disconnection is a power, not a flaw. Embrace it, and make something of your pathetic self. She urges me, pushing me closer to the edge than I should be allowed.

“Shut. Up” I shake my head.

I’m fed up with her voice, her tone, her mood swings, her rudeness. The way she blames, The sass behind her throat. I throw my hands from my hair looking up at the window again. The demon sits off away from the middle. It hovers in the tree looking straight at me. It’s difficult to see in the darkness and in all the shadows mixed around, but I see its figure, out of place.

“I’m so sick of this...” I whisper between breathes, “I am done being afraid.”

My hair falls beside my face and I tilt my head downward and stare up at the spirit, thinking of myself as my own type demon. I stand up and walk around the bed.

It’s not banging on the window anymore but staring. My heart racing I walk in front of the window to face it. It floats to me, rising up and slipping through the now open window up above. My skin shakes as it slides into the room with me. It drifts to me so very slowly, meeting me with a distance of three feet between us. I hold my breath so close to this thing. It hovers over the ground so I have to star up into where its face should be.

“Who-” I’m cut off when it puts it’s hand to where its mouth would be and blows.

The fuck!

It opened its palm and blew a blue sparkling powder into my face. I shrivel back, grabbing at my face. I don’t yelp, or make any noise for that matter, just stumble back with my face in my hands. I squeeze my eyes shut, powder thickening in my eye lids. My nose begins to itch, terribly. It smells like shampoo. I squint up at the demon one more time before it backs up and zips out of the window from where it came. My eyelids squint, blind. But feel heavy. Too heavy to keep open long enough to step to the bed. I collapse on the floor yet again.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - –

I returned from the hospital with tons of medication to take. I woke in the same hospital bed for the second time that morning with a nurse in the room this time. She handed me a white bag full of my clothes I was wearing the night I vomited in the bathroom. Leaving was awful. I panicked when I saw Mother for the first time in the hospital. She didn’t say a word to me untl we fot in the car. The talk with the doctor was awkward and long. He was absolutely positive I had attempted my life. He suggested a therapist and more medication, if not immediate enrollment to another “helping home”. Mother nodded to it all. The doctor had asked me if I had anything to say and this is where I zoned back in.

“I didn’t try to kill myself, ok, this wasn’t on purpose, I just wanted to sleep,” I reply.

He went on to lecture me for another ten minutes when he asked another question, “Why did you feel you needed that many pills just to sleep?”

“I didn’t know. I didn’t know what would happen, I didn’t think about it, look, mom, I saw something last night...” I look at her.

She won’t look back. The doctor, however, raised his eyebrow and studies me.

“I saw something in the halls. When the lights went off last night. I think the medication the nurse gave me was too strong or something-, Mom are you listening?”

She still doesn’t look, just nods like she did at the doctor.

“It was a shadow or something, but just by itself,”

Her eyes met mine for the first time all day. She parted her mouth like she was going to speak, but didn’t

“Ok, I think this has spiraled a bit off track, Jaynessa, the main goal here is treatment,”

My nerves jumped in my skin at the word, and I sent daggers in my eyes his way without realizing. The doctor asks me to leave the room so they could speak. They think I’m insane and the more I spoke the more I buried myself. I squeeze my fists in my palms trying to figure this out, there must be something I’m not understanding. Something that I can’t grasp and apparently can only make myself look worse and worse. They have an adult language I can’t speak. They only hear an insane child on the edge. I begin to feel the nervousness of more treatment. I know he didn’t intend ‘treatment’ to be what I know it as, but the thought of more doctors trying to experiment their new findings brings out a fear I can’t tolerate. I lean against the door to listen in on the conversation.

“She needs more help, her mind isn’t getting the attention it needs, and I fear she’s a danger to herself.” The doctor says. “She needs constant watch and check ups. If you are not willing to commit and watch her through out her day, we can admit her to a new home where they can keep an eye on her at all times. Just until she gets better.”

My heart stops beating and my ears start roaring with hot blood.

“Are you up to supervising her at all times at home?”

Mother nods like she’s been doing the whole time, and I exhale. I just got lucky, I won’t take this chance for granted.

“Alright,” the doctor continues, “I’d still like to continue to see her, weekly meetings, if that works for you.”

She nods again.

“Have you noticed the cuts on her left arm,”

She nods.

“She isn’t to be alone. Not for a minute throughout the day, understand?”

Again she nods. And I begin getting angry.

“The nurse reported your daughter has a thick layer of severe bruising on her laterals, both left and right. I assume you are aware, it is very disruptive. I suggest you take a look at some of these new techniques coming to the public, we’re working with shock as they’re doing in America and the results are astonishing. What does her schedule look like-”

“Did the lights go out at all last night?”

The doctor stammers on his words and a new hope arises in my Mother. I’ve never seen her show this type of interest in me.

“Uh, well the lights are on timers, they shut off when they haven’t been triggered in a while,”

“Oh.” Mother said simply.

I pull away from the door feeling angry and ignored. He’s wrong. They don’t want to hear what I have to say they want to prove their own selves right.

How can they try to tell me whats wrong with my own brain, when they won’t hear what it has to say?

I walk to the car seething and sit in the passenger seat to wait. When Mother finally came out I had decided not to waste this chance. I was lucky to not be admitted this morning, and I don’t plan on ever going back to the asylum. We sit in silence for more than half the car ride home. The first words Mother says to me in the car are,

“I tried, Jane, I tried,”

She still refuses to look at me but she sounds sad. Genuinely, hurt and upset, I might believe she’s actually feeling distress for me.

“What?”

“I tried keeping you here. I tried convincing them your stable. I fought to keep them from putting you back, but,”

“What.”

“You have one month to show improvement. No sightings, ok? No panic attacks, no crazy stories, none of it anymore ok...and they won’t send you back to Bromley.”

I sit there staring at the weak woman that supposed to be my Mother. “You tried,” I feel cold, but hot with anger. It sinks into me, understanding I will have to play nice for a month but it didn’t matter, no one will listen to me when that month is up. “You tried?!” I lost my shit.

She looks astonished at the loud slam of my fist on the door and the raise of mt voice.

“YOU put me in there in the first place! YOU convinced the doctors I’m something I’m not a long time ago! YOU lied about me! You suggested the asylum-”

“It’s not an asylum!” She shouts back, “Stop calling it that. It’s an institution, they’ll help you They did help you.”

I laughed now, “You don’t listen to a word I say. Help?” I laugh again, “They helped us, testing on us...is helpful? They’re the fucking crazy ones! They tested weapons on us!”

“I said no more crazy stories! Do you want to go back? Liquid weapons, Jane, do you hear yourself? You sound-”

“I’m not the crazy one-” I stop myself.

There is no point. I only strengthen her argument when I open my mouth. No matter how hard I tried to explain myself it always ends with that look on her face. I have no control.

I sit back crossing my arms. “I don’t know why I’m surprised. Old habits.”

“What do you mean?”

“You want to put me back so no one sees who’s the real insane one and you can profit of my prescriptions again.”

We pull into the lot of our apartment building. She shuts off the engine and opens her door as she speaks, “I want to help your sick mind, Skitz,” she’s almost shouting, “You’re a danger. To me, to yourself. You are not developed enough to live a normal life,” she shoves the white bag full of my new medicine bottles at me. “It’s not my fault you could never tell the difference from reality and your own imagination.” she scoffs, “You couldn’t even get your suicide right.”

“I wasn’t trying to kill myself!”

But she didn’t hear me. She was already out of the car walking to the door. I get out after her, slamming the door behind me. I take the stairs slowly as she rides the elevator up. When I get to my floor, I don’t see her, nor do I as I walk through the apartment to my room throwing the door shut. My small bag of meds in my hand, I throw them on the floor and change my clothes. These clothes have dried vomit on them. I lie on my bed thinking about the demon, and the dream, and the boy. They’re connected somehow I know they are. But I cant even get a single person to listen to me. I can’t get any help. I look on the floor at the large book. It’s open, face down so the pages are crumpled and on the floor. Everyone is against me. Everyone thinks I’m crazy. They want me locked up for more money. They think I’m insane.

[mee-goweng]

WHAT IF - 🍋 STAYED ON 🦈'S SIDE (🦈🍋)

Warning: abusive relationship Word count: 700+ words

It was a normal day. Taiju walked back to his new place after doing his monthly shopping. That day, he spent more time choosing ingredients because he wanted to try to cook something new for his lover, Aki.

It's been years since the church incident, and now he lives peacefully with Aki, far from his old place. He even opened a restaurant under his name. What a wonderful life, don't you think?

As he arrived at his place, he went to put away the groceries while occasionally looking at the clock.

"Is he still sleeping?"

Seeing the clock showing it was still evening, Taiju sighed. He grabbed his cooking utensils and started cooking dinner for himself and Aki.

Taiju knocked on Aki's bedroom door while his other hand held a tray of Aki's dinner. Without waiting for Aki's reply, he went inside Aki's bedroom.

"It's dinner time."

Taiju said, seeing the older one sitting on his bed, didn't even bother to greet Taiju. But Taiju didn't care. He closed the door behind him before going to the side of Aki's bed. He pulled a chair, where he always sat, then sat there.

"I made a new dish today." Taiju put a napkin on Aki, carefully tying it to Aki's neck. "Your little sister said you like this kind of dish."

Taiju cut the food into tiny bites and then fed it to Aki.

"Come on. You didn't eat much earlier today."

Aki opened his mouth, took a small bite then chewed it slowly. Taiju sat there, waiting patiently until Aki swallowed his food. After Aki was done, Taiju fed Aki again until Aki finished the whole dish.

"Here, you need to drink."

Aki didn't say anything. He just opened his mouth as Taiju pointed the straw to his mouth, letting the older male drink a little.

"Want me to close the curtain? It's already dark outside."

Not receiving any word from the older male, Taiju sighed, slowly sounding more frustrated. But he didn't want to make Aki mad at him, so he tried not to question things furthermore. He cleaned everything, putting the tray away before closing the curtain on Aki's bedroom.

Before leaving Aki's room to wash the dishes, Taiju looked at him for the last time. Checking everything before leaving the room. Aki didn't even glance at him, not even once.

It was his fault. It was all Taiju's fault. The night of his defeat, he was beyond upset. Way too upset that Aki became his punching bag, venting everything to the older one. And that was far, way more brutal than that time Aki told him about quitting the Black Dragon.

When he got back to his sense, he was late. Everything was beyond broken. It was worse than the last time, way worse.

"Paralyzed?"

There Taiju was, listening to the doctor's diagnosis of Aki's condition in silence, holding all his emotions inside. Hakkai was almost right about him killing Aki. Almost. But Hakkai's words haunted him. What would happen later in the future if he could do this much? The image of Aki dead in his hands was enough to frighten him.

"You… YOU MONSTER! WHAT DID MY BROTHER DO TO YOU!? HE GAVE EVERYTHING TO YOU, AND THIS? IS THIS ALL HE GOT FROM YOU AFTER BEING LOYAL TO YOU?"

He let Aki's little sister yell at him, letting everyone know what a cruel man he is. Allowing the small hands to hit his body. The hit was nothing compared to what he did to Aki. At least, it did nothing to him physically. The anger from Aki's little sister slowly turned into sorrow as her punch got weaker and slower.

"I'm… sorry."

That was the stiffest sentence Taiju ever said. He never apologizes, aside from begging for forgiveness from god. That was the first time for him. Head hung low while kneeling on the cold floor of the hospital hallway. The so-called pride and ego had already been thrown away, all for forgiveness from Aki's only family.

He did the same thing every single night in Aki's bedroom. Not begging. Just simply saying apologies after apologies. Tears ran down as he looked at the older one, who was sleeping peacefully. Way too peaceful, considering his condition didn't get any better.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry… Forgive me, Aki."

He never heard any reply or response from Aki. Never, not even once.

©mee-goweng

[softjakehoon]

My Roommate Who Uses an XL Condom pt. 1

pairing: Jay/Reader

includes: slight edging, deep throat, cum in mouth, rough sex, breeding kink, roommate sex

warning: this is a written smut, if you don’t like reading stuff like this, scroll down for your sake please it’s not that complicated, thank you. 

also, this was inspired by a manga called "Joushi no Asoko wa XL size" and it's the part about the xl condom thingy, which would be on the second part though. and of course, our y'n being a product reviewer. the rest are based on my imagination.

----

You've been searching for a part-time job for a couple of hours now, but most of the jobs available are full-time shifts. You're in your fourth year in college and you're pretty much occupied with all of the school works and activities that's why you resigned from your previous customer service job. You have no choice but to choose a job that will allow you to manage your own time. It's not like you wanted to do this out of boredom. You have to support yourself to afford your tuition fees and daily expenses. Your parents are both senior citizens so you had to work right after you turned 18.

"Product reviewer? No way, this sounds too good to be true."

One-week deadline per product.

Flexible work schedule. 

Salary offer $1000 per review.

You didn't hesitate to submit your application. You have to get this job or you won't be able to pay rent. You don't even have anything to eat for this week. You sighed at your current situation. You went to the shower room to clean up before going to bed. 

---

You woke up around 8 am, starving. You went to the kitchen to find something to eat. You were surprised to see the fridge full of actual food to eat. 

"Am I dreaming? How is the fridge full of food when it was empty last night?" You grabbed a tub of marinated beef and began cooking. 

"Fuck, when was the last time I ate meat? I've only been eating ramen and junk food lately. No wonder I feel like shit." You laughed at your own misery. You were cut off by the sound of the door opening. You don't remember inviting anyone over to your apartment. You don't have a roommate as well so you started to feel nervous. 

"Who is it?" You shouted while chewing on the meat you wrapped with lettuce. 

You turned your head around to see a man around your age wearing all black and a frown on his face. 

"Who are you?" He asked you back. 

"I asked you a question first. Why do you have a key to my apartment?" This time, you went to speak to him up close. You're near-sighted so you wanted to see him up close. 

"I'm Jay. I moved in last night. Are you my roommate?" He kept his cold expression. 

He's handsome as fuck, but cold as hell. You thought to yourself. Too bad. 

"Oh, that must be why the fridge is full this morning. Fuck, sorry I cooked the beef bulgogi just now. I will pay you back once I get paid from my job." You looked down from embarrassment. 

"That's alright." He didn't even bother to ask your name and went to his room. You didn't want to bug him about it since you still owe him a tub of beef so you just shrugged your shoulder and finished your breakfast. 

While eating, you checked on your email for updates. 

"Holy fuck." Your jaw dropped upon reading an email. It was from the company you applied to last night. You got the job, and you're starting today. 

You signed the contract immediately and submitted all the needed requirements. Your first product will arrive in the afternoon so you couldn't help but be excited while washing the dishes. 

After doing the dishes, you decided to do the laundry. You've been going braless in the apartment when you were still alone but you have a male roommate now so you can't do that anymore. You needed to wash them. 

"Fuck, I ran out of shorts as well? What have I been doing all this time to forget doing my laundry?"

You decided to wear an oversized almost see-through white shirt and black underwear. 

While you were putting your clothes in the front load washing machine, you heard him pretending to cough. 

You dropped the clothes upon hearing that and looked around to see him piercing you with his eyes staring straight at your body. 

"What do you think are you doing?" He said, raising his eyebrows. 

"I'm doing my laundry. Are you blind?" You looked to your side, afraid of meeting his eyes. 

He stood in front of you, "I'm not. In fact I'm very much pleased of what I'm seeing right now." You gulped when he touched your chin and forced you to look into his eyes. 

"What are you doing?" You're starting to get nervous, or turned on. You don't know anymore. Is it because you haven't had sex for so long now? Fuck, you know you can't have sex with your roommate. You know damn well how it would end since your ex was also your roommate before. 

"I'm making you look at my face. Ever since we met you've been avoiding my gaze." He smirked at you, turning you on even more. 

"T-that's because you look scary, dude. Geez, get your hands off me or I will punch your face so I won't have any reason to look at it." You tried to push him away only for him to corner you on the wall with his arms locking you in. 

"Don't call me that. Or I will kiss you right now." You knew he wasn't bluffing. But for some reason, you wanted to kiss him as well. So you called him that. 

"Stop playing around, dude. Can't you see I'm busy doing someth-" You were cut off by his lips on yours. It stayed still for a short moment as if he was trying to see how you would react. But when he sensed you closing your eyes, he began to move his lips along with yours.

It was a sweet and passionate kiss as if he knew you all his life. It felt so good, you couldn't help but pull his hair, making the kiss deeper. His right hand holding your face along with your jaw, his left hand holding your waist, keeping you close to his body. You could feel your core starting to get wet from the heat that you're feeling, making you rub your thighs together. Taking the hint, Jay placed his knee in the middle and closed the distance between your body. You're now grinding on his thighs, desperately looking for friction and release. 

"Are we just gonna kiss all day or are you going to fuck me?" You pulled away from the kiss and chased your breath.

"I thought you said you're busy." He smirked again. 

"Well now I'm not." You kissed him again, this time with so much lust and desire. Jay is incredibly handsome, he's tall and has a nice body as well. Normally, you don't hang out with guys like him because you know they're always into pretty girls, but you don't want to think about it for now. 

"Relax, baby. I'll get you nice and ready first." He grabbed your breasts as soon as he removed your shirt, sucking on your nipples while his right hand palming your core. 

"I guess I don't even need to. You're soaking wet already. Is this all for me, babe?" He removed your last piece of clothing and slipped two fingers inside you. 

"Fuck, Jay. Shut up already and put it in.” You can't help but moan as he slips his fingers in and out of you.

“Stop bossing me around, brat.” There was a sudden change in his aura, his fingers thrusting in and out of you now roughly. 

“Damn it, I wanna cum on your cock, please. Fuck me already.” You begged. You’re about to reach your climax under his touch. All of a sudden, he removed his fingers making you bite your lips in frustration.

“What the hell? Why did you sto-” You were cut off when he grabbed a fistful of your hair, pushing you down on your knees. He immediately removed his belt and tied your hands with it. You stared at him with your puppy eyes while waiting for him to remove his clothes.

He pumped his cock a couple of times before squeezing your cheeks, a sign for you to open your mouth. You were taken aback by the size of his cock in your tiny mouth. You can’t even touch him to support yourself, so he was holding you by your hair and fucking your mouth as he wants. 

“See, this is what your mouth is for. It’s not for you to talk back, or be a brat. This mouth is meant for my cock.” Tears pooled in your eyes as the tip of his dick hits your throat every time he would thrust. You were able to get rid of your gag reflex, thanks to your ex.

“Fuck, how are you so good at this? I fucking love your mouth. You’ve got no gag reflex? Fucking insane, ahh.” He’s growling at this point. You can tell he’s close as the veins in his dick are getting more prominent and it’s twitching inside your mouth.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum.” After a couple of thrusts, he came down your throat. You gladly swallowed his cum, making sure nothing goes to waste.

“Shit, brat. You better remember how I taste.” He said, untying your hands from his belt. He helped you to stand, kissing you while placing you on top of the counter. 

He took no time in aligning himself into your core. He gathered your wetness using the tip of his dick and finally pushed it in. You can definitely feel the stretch but the pleasure goes beyond the pain at this point. You were moaning softly against his ear. 

“Fuck, you feel so tight around me.” His thrust getting steady and rougher each time.

“You feel so good, Jay. I’m gonna cum.” You’re finally getting the release he denied you earlier.

“That’s right, cum on my cock.” You moaned in response. Your walls tightening around him even more, making him meet his nearing climax for the second time.

“Cum with me, Jay. Come inside me, please.” You were on birth control anyway. You were on an injectable contraceptive and it’s still in effect ‘til now. You will probably need to ask him if he’s fucking around later on but you really wanted to have his cum inside you. Hearing you beg for his cum was music to his ears. After easing you from your high with a couple of thrusts, he came right after. You felt his dick twitch inside you, his cum spreading heat in your walls. He pulled out seconds after, making his cum leak out of you.

Jay swore he took a mental image of it in his mind. You looked so hot, all fucked out because of him. You, on the other hand, waited for him to help you get off the counter.

Which he didn’t do. He put on his clothes and went straight to the bathroom to clean himself. 

“What a jerk. Did he just leave me here after all that?” You tried not to feel too disappointed. Still, it made you feel angry. He could’ve at least helped you. “I’m never having sex with you again, asshole.” You said just enough for him to hear you in the bathroom.

Author’s note: Jay’s point of view will be on the second part. He’s a gentleman pls.

[bay-did-nothing-wrong]

Tell All (Donatello x Reader)

Synopsis: Don and the Reader had been hiding their relationship from his family but they decide its finally time to come clean.

Genre: Fluff mostly, some crack, literally one sex pun

Word count: 1946

Soft.

So soft.

Wasn't his skin supposed to be rougher all together? How were his lips so soft and smooth then? Just another mystery.

Your mouths split with a tiny wet sound, but neither of you was in a rush to go anywhere.

But you should have been.

"Dinner's ready!" came Mikey's energetic shout from somewhere withing the lair. Probably the kitchen.

A soft longing sigh left your lips, and you felt a warm current of air hit your face - Don felt the same.

"We should go." you state, convincing yourself as much as him.

"Do we have to?" he whined breathlessly.

Yes, yes, you did. And he knew that. You both did. Otherwise his brothers and his very observant father will notice you're acting suspicious. They'll probably figure out he wasn't just helping you study for that AP Statistics exam. That is, if they hadn't already.

Your hands slid down his shoulders in an attempt to separate you two but instead they fell onto the top of his plastron, thumbs running softly over the last uncovered skin there, where you knew he was sensitive.

"Hmmm..." it came out as a low growl and it surrounded you on all sides. "You're not helping."

"Am I ever?"

"DONNIE! (Y/N)! DINNER!" at least Mikey stuck to the strict "No entering during study-sessions" rules. That's good to know that he can be intimidated into compliance. Or blackmailed... Point is, it worked.

Donnie's head falls in defeat, forehead leaning on yours for support.

So glad he took those goggles off. You can see more of him this way.

He sighed again, defeated - he was too smart to not figure out that at some point your behavior will raise suspicion. His head lifted back, and turned to the door.

"Coming!"

And your cheeky ass giggled at that.

"Oh, Donnie." you teased, "I haven't even started."

"Pfft. " chuckle, and a snort.

He really did like your dirty puns.

The man took your hand into his cool giant one, somehow providing comfort like no other, as he pulled you to the lab entrance. But once at the door you had to split. It's part of the arrangement.

His family shouldn't know about you.

You two decided at the early stage of your budding romance that keeping the whole thing on the down-low for a while was the smartest choice. It would prevent his brother's jealousy, it won't incite any fights, it won't change their relationship with you and you'll get to feel things out at your own pace - no pressure or prying eyes.

Just you.

But there was a list of downsides too. For one, neither of you was a great actor, Don was even shit at lying, so you'd had to take extra steps to remain as friendly-looking as possible. Then there was the trying-to-set-you-up-with-Vern thing that April was doing and every time the topic came up you could act regular-disgusted but not in-a-happy-relationship disgusted, and so would your favourite turtle. And then there was the hiding, coveting each other in the lab or in small stolen moments in the lair, and the lying about going topside to do recon or install something somewhere, the covering up - no, of course Donnie wasn't with you at your place, he must have gone somewhere else.

You were quite honestly sick of it. You were ready to tell his brothers. You were ready to tell the world.

"We should tell them." his voice was once again low, quiet as if to preserve the last few moments of the secret to yourselves.

Once again you were entirely in sync despite being vastly different.

He was a genius, you, decidedly, weren't.

He was really into sports, you weren't.

He was a 6'8 ninja turtle raised underground by a rat dad, and you obviously were not.

And yet somehow, you clicked.

"I agree."

At that point you knew that your approval would kick into gear the most destructive process in Donnie's mind - overthinking.

Your hand immediately darted out and grabbed one of his pulling it up to your lips and kissing the knuckles in reassurance.

"We'll figure it out."

But still, you had to split. Even if you did plan to tell them, there would be a time and a place for that.

"What took you so long? The lasagna got cold." Mikey was positively outraged - as much as he could be - by your lack of interest in his usually excellent cooking.

"Sorry, Mikey." you butted in, trying to save the day, "There's just something about Inferential Statistical Analysis that I can't wrap my head around." Bullshit, you knew exactly what it was and how it worked - it's part of the basics but he didn't need to know that.

"Still smells great though!" Don sounds cheerful enough even though you'd just agreed to break the fragile peace in your relationship just a minute prior. He was getting really good at the lying part. Too bad it won't be needed for much longer.

Dinner was as uneventful as it can be around five mutant ninjas. Master Splinter asked about your day, you told him about the nearing finals season and he offered some comforting words after which the conversation bounced around the rest of the family in a natural progression.

Once you were full, and once all of Mikey's delicious food had been virtually inhaled by the four giant men around you, you got up to get the dishes to the kitchen and help clean up. It was only fair, after all.

Apparently it was Ralph's turn to wash dishes and there was no wiggling out of that because Splinter said so. Well, at least you can dry them.

And dry them you did, meanwhile casual conversation about whatever kept flowing and you figured you won't be able to go back to the lab and do some more 'Statistics'.

You were just drying and putting away the last plate when a thiqq arm stretched over your head to reach a cupboard you couldn't even get to in your dreams.

Your head whipped back, eyes landing straight on some hard looking chest plates under a pair of suspenders. And then you looked up and saw Donatello, the cheeky shit, with a pop tart in his mouth and a shit-eating grin around it.

"Oops, sorry, (Y/N), didn't see you there."

Oh, I'll give you Oops, didn't see me, my ass. You'll see.

He was being unusually open about his closeness to you and that was less then an hour after you'd decided to come clean.

He was ready then.

"I was planning on checking out the meatpacking District tomorrow." Leo was going on about that idea he had to check out some building or another, Mikey was wiping down the table, and Raph was finishing up the dishes, and for once Don was just there chilling.

His treat was gone, meaning he ate it all, he seemed relaxed, his shoulders loose and shell leaning on the wall.

No time like the present.

"You guys, I'm gonna head out. I've got work tomorrow and after that I've got a study group to attend so, I should head to bed."

"You need us to walk you home?" Leo asked more out of courtesy, he knew you lived close and would usually decline.

"No, no, that's okay." you replied, looking for your bag and jacket where you'd left them near the kitchen table.

"Aaaw, you're leaving already? Well, at least you ate." Mikey quickly swept you into a hug goodbye and turned back to sorting his ingredients in the cupboards.

"Thanks to you, Mikey Steward." to which he giggled in response.

"See you tomorrow, shorty." Raph waved as he turned to get a beer from the fridge.

"Stay safe out there, okay?" Leo always the guardian, warned you for the hundredth time, again just out of courtesy.

And then you walked to where Don was leaning on the wall, took his chin in your hand and pulled him down.

Oh, shit, am I actually gonna do this!?

Your lips met, your heart pounded, the room became super hot and that wasn't just because of the brilliant piece of man-candy in your hands. You could feel their eyes but then again that was the whole point.

A loud dramatic intake of air was heard, a drop of something metallic and then silence.

Your face pulled away from him, eyes opening slightly to look at him, as your weight fell back onto your heels from standing on your tiptoes. His face had that same dazed, satisfied-yet-hungry look that he usually had whenever you'd had to break apart.

He tasted so sweet, you just had to lick your lips at the memory.

"I'll see you tomorrow." you whispered, that was all you could force out in that moment.

"See you tomorrow." his voice was as soft as yours even though his brothers could probably hear.

You fully pulled away from your man, now certain that there'd be no secrets between you and the ninja clan.

You were not an actor, you quickly got embarrassed with your performance, however brilliant it may have been, and speedily scammed to pick up your belongings and jogged outta there.

You turned one last time, because something in you said you should and what you saw was truly a sight.

All three of Don's bothers with their mouths hanging open and Splinter peeking out of the door to the dojo with his eyes like saucers and then there's Donnie - the image of peace, hands in his pockets, a soft smile on his lips, now shiny from your lip gloss, and looking you straight in the eye as you retreated.

"Bye." you shout to no one in particular and scramble for the exit.

-_-_-_-_-

Phone - charging

Alarm - set

Pajamas - on

What's missing then?

Ding!

Your phone notified you that someone was requesting your attention and you were more than happy to find out it was your man.

'Hey, Laika' Oh lord it so got you giggling like a schoolgirl when he called you that.

'Hey, Tyson' and then he told you that he loved to be compared with the biggest name in astrophysics today.

'How did it go?' you felt super bad for bailing on him but at the same time there was this relief that came with the cat being out of the bag.

'Surprisingly well. No one was mad that we kept it a secret.' well, that's good. You won't have to jeopardize your relationship with the boys. 'Dad still wants to talk to you tho'

Ah, well, that's to be expected. Even though Donnie is an adult, the were still a very tightly knit family unit so, you supposed that something like that would be a pretty big deal.

'That's fine, I'd do whatever'

'I wish I could kiss you rn'

It honestly shocked you how chill about it he was. Probably because he wasn't being grilled for information anymore, neither of you would have to lie anymore, and because he could now tell Vern to fuck right off, with no worry about how it would look.

You were so looking forward to being solely and entirely his.

'Tomorrow we start anew'

He had a point, things would change. But hopefully not between you.

'Can't wait to meet you for the first time again lol' you didn't know if you were being funny or just cheesy but it felt right.

Despite your smile, your eyes started drooping, your breaths slowing and you felt the exhaustion of the day slowly hug you like a blanket.

'Goodnight'

'Goodnight, (Y/N)'

[plaidstiel-wormstache]

Louder

Hello all, I wrote this the other day (yes, I wrote something), hope you enjoy!

Word Count: 1000 Genre: smut Character: RPF - Chris Evans, Sebastian Stan, Anthony Mackie Warnings: adult theme Summary: With long friendships comes in-jokes, jokes that carry on through the years, but sometimes those jokes come back to bite you in the ass!

Chris was a great friend, I loved hanging out with him, loved flirting with him, loved riling him up and loved to see him flustered. 

I was in my early twenties when I stayed with him for a week and overheard him watching porn. To be fair to him, I made a lot of noise coming into the tiny flat, slammed the door, kicked my shoes off, dropped my bag and all that was before I heard the moans. So I went about closed cupboards loudly, washing dishes and stacking cutlery, but nope. He was listening to a screamer!

I put my discman on and plugged it into my ears, made my dinner and was sitting on the couch when he came out of his room, thankfully from behind a closed door. He went bright red, not just a faint blush but the splotchy up his neck, his cheeks and into his hairline kind of red! 

He was mortified.

I made a joke out of it. He nervously laughed, made himself dinner and went back into his room. 

I didn’t see him till the next day. But the damage was done and he was in for a long term joke. 

I pretended to choke on something on my last night while we were having dinner and when he came up behind me to give me the heimlich I moaned as he wrapped his arms around me. 

Again, he went bright red, but I almost did die … of laughter! “Shut up! Like you never watch porn!” He spat at me, gathering up his bowl and heading for his room. “Not that loudly or obliviously!” I called after him. He turned around and hit me a filthy look, but I just smiled wickedly and moaned loud, reaching a hand down my front. “Fuck off!” He groaned as he slammed his door behind him. 

Ten years later and the joke hadn’t stopped being funny. But he’d come to see the funny side and could laugh too. 

I’d call him and wait for him to answer and start moaning down the line at him. I’d leave him a voice message on his home phone, once I even sent him a CD of it. 

But he got me back! One day he was at a convention and on the day of his panel I was hoping to get him on stage, make him go beet red. Alas, it wasn’t the case.

“YNN, hey I’m about to—“ I was already moaning, breathy and wanton, then I heard another voice. “Get it girl!” Anthony’s voice called. I almost choked on my next breath, spluttering, I hung up. I was mortified. Then the thought that made me cringe crossed my mind - what if Seb heard too? My phone started ringing, Chris’s face appeared. “What?” I spat down the phone. It was just laughter. I hung up.

Sorry, I had to! Came the text message a moment later. I glared at the screen but typed out a response. I deserved that… I guess He began typing, the three little dots bobbing up and down, but I typed out another text and hit send before he could. Tell me he wasn’t listening … please don’t let him have heard. The three dots disappeared then came back for a brief moment before… He’s redder than a beetroot! 

I tossed my phone to the end of the couch and went to the kitchen. My mind playing it back, composing the scene at the other end of the phone: Chris standing around, about to go on stage, talking with his friends, my call… I could see him putting me on speaker before I’d even had a chance to start. He’d look at Seb, at Mackie, then just guffaw as they responded. Seb in shock and disgust, Mackie into faux-shock then hysterics, slapping Chris’s shoulder.

I couldn’t get the image from my mind. A run. A run would clear it. Or I’d out run it. Either way. I left my phone at the end of the sofa and pulled on my sneakers before leaving my apartment.

The sting of embarrassment had worn off by the time I got back to my apartment, but I was still sore. 

I busied myself with making dinner, washing up and cleaning the kitchen. I didn’t wanna see any more texts from Chris, or maybe even Mackie… god forbid Seb. But my cleaning in the kitchen led into the bedroom and by the time my lasagna came out of the oven I had forgotten all about my phone. I plonked down on the couch and put on the TV, kicking my feet up onto the coffee table. It wasn’t until the movie finished much later into the night (than I would’ve liked) that I looked around for my phone. 4 new messages, two from Chris, one from Mackie and a voice mail.

I opened Mackie’s first: ten years of that? Wonder he’s still alive! Then over to Chris’s messages… a series of well chosen emojis; laughing/crying faces, a couple of tongues, winks and an eggplant. Classy! I thought, rolling my eyes. I navigated over to the voice mail and dialed in to listen to it. It was Chris’s number, but he wasn’t speaking. As I listened it was a man’s heavy breathing, then there was a grunt.

My jaw dropped, he was playing the game! But this was hot. This was… Grunting and heavy breathing turned into a gutteral moan. My cheeks felt hot, my heart beat was hammering, and I’m not even ashamed to say my panties were wet. The breathing sped up, another moan, a low growl, the grunting picked up. Good Christ, I might come! Was one of the many thoughts flying through my head as I continued to listen to him climax.

I sat there as the voicemail woman listed options for me: “Press one to call back, press two to replay the message, press three to delete the message, press four to save the message.” I bit my lip and looked around the apartment to the bedroom door. I looked back down at the phone and pressed two, already heading for my room and the bedside draw that held a well-loved vibrator.

***

If you enjoyed it please share the love, leave a comment or reblog with a gif! Tagging the old regulars: @butiaintgonnaloveem @wi-deangirl77 @manawhaat @notnaturalanahi @atc74 @queendragon0614 @gabby913 @ohmychuckitssamanddean @grace-for-sale @mogaruke​ @kristaparadowski​ @blacktithe7​ 

[peachbear88]

The Greatest Love Story

A/N: Inspired by this lovely image I saw. I'm making this into a high school angst AU that takes place in like the 1900's. For the record, I know Steve isn't a bad person but this is an AU and I need one of those... You know, guys for this story so.... Yeah! Sorry! BTW, the second poem is not written by me, it's written by Elizabeth Barrett Browning and I stole some quotes from Shakespeare.

Warnings: Angst, homophobia, swearing, character death.

Word Count: 3.2k

Pairing: Yelena Belova x Reader

----------

You scale the ancient wooden stairs of your small school. avoiding eye contact with anyone. The stares you receive from others are painfully obvious as you speed walk towards the library, seeking shelter from the judgmental glances from your peers.

"Hello dear," the kind librarian greets you as you walk past her towards your corner of the library.

You don't respond, quickly ducking behind the massive shelves, hoping to spend as much time as possible in your safe space before the classes start. Placing back your old books, you scan the shelves, until a particular title catches your eye.

"Love Poems by Women?" You murmur, flipping through the worn pages.

----------

A giant dusty book lands on the librarian's desk, making her look up.

"May I take this out?" You ask, your tone emotionless, cold yet tentative. The librarian smiles gently at you handing you back the book.

"Of course dear. Happy reading." You give her a small, thankful smile before dashing out of the library door. The halls are partially empty, save for the kids that skip class, hanging around in the hallways and dark alleys after school.

You duck your head, avoiding eye contact as you pass the group leaning against the lockers, most importantly, the hazel eyed beauty that could snap your neck in half, Yelena Belova.

"Hey!" Your head snaps up. Big mistake. You lock eyes with the famed blonde and you drop your head immediately, a faint blush creeping up your cheeks.

"Y-Yes?"

"Look at me when I'm talking to you." She snaps. You peek at her from the corner of your eye, her sleek dress pants catching your eye.

"Interesting outfit choice," you note before you can stop yourself.

"What did you say?" She demands and you gulp, backing away.

"N-nothing." She slowly steps towards you, backing you into the lockers.

"Get to class. And don't ever let me see you again идиот (idiot)." You hurry down the hall towards your classroom, tripping in the process as you repeatedly look over your shoulder, watching as Yelena turns back to her friend group.

---------

"She was cute," Natasha points out as Yelena reclaims her spot leaning against the lockers. "Why do you feel the need to tease her so relentlessly?" Yelena rolls her eyes, grabbing the flask of vodka back from her sister.

"She's annoying. I don't like her." Natasha smirks.

"Sure. Whatever you say."

---------

You let out a sigh of relief when the bell rings.

Your classmates flood out of the classroom, jostling each other aside in their rush to get home. You quickly sprint out the door, eager to get home, safe and sound when a hand grabs you by the arm and pulls you into a dark alley behind the school.

"Hello there girly..." A deep voice says. You gulp. The boy steps into the light to reveal Steve Rogers. One of those people that take pride in hurting others, a bully, your tormenter.

"W-what do you want?" He smirks, stepping closer to you.

"Well, a little birdie told me that someone had an encounter with a specific blonde this morning." You flinch when he grabs you by the throat, pinning you to the wall. "You wouldn't happen to be... I don't know, one of those dykes would you?" Your eyes widen and you shake your head vigorously as he laughs. "Oh man," he sputters, choking through his laughter. "Wait till the school gets ahold of this-"

He doesn't get to finish his sentence because a fist connects with his face, sending him reeling backwards.

"What the-" A strong hand wraps around his throat, pushing him backwards till his back connects with the wall.

"Listen to me you маленькое дерьмо (little shit), if you ever even think about coming near her again, I will sneak into your house at night, gut you like the fish you are and paint the school with them." Yelena warns in a surprisingly calm voice. Steve's eyes widen and he nods his head frantically until she lets go.

"Crazy bitch!" He spits, backing away quickly. You shuffle your feet, looking down at the ground as she watches him run.

"T-thank you." You mutter, not daring to look her in the eye. She sighs.

"This better not become a daily thing Y/L/N." You nod feebly. "Get out of here." You quickly pick your bag back up and sprint out of the alley, leaving Yelena by herself,

---------

"I'm home mom!"

"Welcome home sweetie!" Your mom pokes her head out of the living room.

"How's your book going?"

"As great as a woman writing a book can be." She chuckles forcibly. There's an awkward silence before she continues. "Your father came by today." She pauses as you swallow, feeling like something lodged itself in your throat.

"And what did he want?" She frowns at your tone.

"Sweetie, I know you don't like him but he's still your fa-"

"I don't have a dad," you growl, picking up your bag. "My dad died when he chose to abandon us." She watches as you climb up the stairs, sighing and rubbing her temple.

---------

You flop onto your bed, dropping the thick dusty buck onto the bed. You spend the rest of the afternoon reading through the poems until your mom calls you down for dinner.

It's an awkward dinner, quiet, only the sounds of dishes, chewing and utensils filling the room.

"I'm going to bed." You say after washing the dishes, not bothering to wait for a response.

That night, you lay in bed, staring at the ceiling of your room.

"Love poems by women." You mutter, an idea popping into your head. You quickly sit up, flicking on your lamp and pulling out the book and a pen.

----------

"Good morning dear," the librarian greets you like she does every morning.

"I'd like to return this book." You reply coldly, passing her the book once again. She smiles gently at you.

"I hope you enjoyed your reading." She says while passing you, returning the book to its original shelf.

-----------

"Hello hon, can I help you with anything?" The librarian asks the dirty-blonde haired girl.

"No, thank you." The girl sends the librarian a tight lipped smile before returning her attention to the shelves. A ripped leather cover catches her attention. Love Poems by Women. She smiles, pulling the book from the shelf. Flipping open to the title page, a neat cursive catches her eyes.

Love flows between beings Gift from the gods Curse from the demons The missing part of every person Destined to be opposites Love is flexible Yet some seek to objectify love Love is not for the weak willed. - Aristophanes

The blonde haired girl hums, pulling a pen from her jacket's pocket and discreetly writing in the book, right next to the poem.

------------

Terrible.

That's the only way to describe your day. You received your essay back, ecstatic to see that you had received an A. Steve on the other hand had absolutely flunked. Instead of dedicating his time to studying, he decided to beat you up as a way of taking out his frustration.

You ended up limping out of the women's toilet, your leg flaring up whenever you moved, tears threatening to fall from your eyes.

"Hi sweetcheeks," the librarian murmurs, her eyes trailing down your injured leg.

"'Ello." You quickly duck behind the shelves, pulling out the book you were looking for. Your brows scrunch together in confusion as you see a messier scrawl next to your handwriting.

Reality hits hard

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight For the ends of being and ideal grace. I love thee to the level of every day's Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I love thee purely, as they turn from praise. I love thee with the passion put to use In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith. I love thee with a love I seemed to lose With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death.

- Orpheus

You smile letting a light laugh slip from your lips. A sweet titter revealing the little girl underneath your cold, traumatized exterior.

Quickly, you grab your pen from your pocket and begin scribbling.

-----------

The air is knocked from your body as your back makes contact with the floor.

"Listen here dyke. I don't like you alright," Steve growls into your ear as Tony cracks his knuckles. "So here's what's going to happen: Everyday you're going to meet us here and," he pauses, cracking his neck. "Help us relive some stress." He smiles wickedly before punching you in the stomach, making you double over in pain.

Your eyes flutter shut as they deliver blow after blow 'till they finally stop. You tentatively open your eyes to see Yelena tackling Steve to the ground as Tony stares at them, eyes wide.

"I. Told. You. To. Leave. Her. Alone!" She screams, pummeling Steve with her fists. He groans, unmoving. You watch in terror as Tony picks up a trash can lid, sneaking up behind her as she punches Steve in the face.

"Watch out!" You scream, taking Tony as well yourself by surprise. She looks up to see you slamming into Tony sending him flying into the nearby wall of the alley.

He crumples, unconscious.

"Are you okay?" You mumble, limping towards Yelena, who's clutching a blood gash on her arm.

"'M fine,' she grits out. You shake your head, grabbing her wrist. She flinches but doesn't push you away.

"You're not okay. Let me help you." You plead. She stays silent and you quickly take her silence as a yes, leading her to the front steps of your home. You rummage through your back pack, finding a large wrap of bandages that you kept after your daily beating from Rogers and his friends.

She winces as you wrap her wound swiftly.

"Gentle!" She growls and you stare back at her defiantly.

"Well maybe if you would stop moving, it'd hurt less!" You retort and she shuts up, staring off into the distance. You dab the cut with a small bit of alcohol before wrapping the bandage all around her arm.

"Thank you." She whispers, giving you a small smile. Reaching out, she gently tucks a strand of hair behind your ear as you flinch back. You quickly, shovel the bandages and medicinal alcohol back into your pack, not noticing the hurt look on her face.

"No problem. The least I could do since you saved me." You reply bluntly, swinging the bag over your shoulder and slipping through the door.

"Wait-" She sighs as the door slams shut in front of her.

You exhale, leaning against the door as you try to catch your breath.

-----------

Yelena sighs exasperatedly, tugging at the collar of her dress shirt.

"What's wrong little sis?" Natasha smirks, plopping down next to her.

"I got hurt and Y/N patched me up." Natasha jumps up, eyes wide.

"You stained your new shirt?" She groans shaking Yelena violently. "God I'm going to kill you!" Yelena grabs her sister, stopping her.

"You're missing the point!"

"Oh yeah? And what's that?" Nat challenges, flopping back down on to the couch.

"She patched me up!" Nat's eyes widen.

"Oh. Oh." She inches closer to her sister, nudging her playfully, much to Yelena's dislike. "So are y'all like," she winks at her sister insinuatingly. "A thing?" Yelena scrunches her brows in confusion.

"A thing?" Nat rolls her eyes, sidling closer to her.

"Yes. A thing. An item? Lovers?" She shrugs, missing the way Yelena blushes.

"In her dreams," Yelena snorts, leaning back into the couch.

"If you say so..."

-----------

"Morning pumpkin!" The librarian chirps.

The blonde girl ignores her, breezing past her towards the the shelves at the very back, peeking over her shoulder quickly before pulling an old, leather bound book from the shelf.

She flips the leather cover aside to reveal the title page. Next to her messy, distorted scrawl was a neat, distinctive cursive once again.

Speak low if you speak love

- Aristophanes

She smiles gently, chuckling as she shakes her head.

"Shakespeare of all people," she whispers, her accent thickening. Pulling a forgotten pen from the shelves, she begins writing,

-----------

The highlight of your day became going to the library and reading the little messages scrawled in between the margins of the book by Orpheus. Like:

If music be the food of love, play on

Or

Her passions are made of nothing but the finest part of pure love.

They made you smile on a daily basis, sometimes even eliciting a rare light laugh.

"Good morning sweetpea." The librarian greets you, not expecting a response. To her surprise and yours, you muster a small smile and a wave.

"Hello." You can feel the librarians shocked eyes following you as you round the bookshelf corner to find Steve, eyes wide, mouth open in shock as he stares down at something in his hands.

Your heart plummets. A book with a soft leather cover, yellowed pages. The book of poems.

You lunge for it but he step sides you swiftly, raising the book above his head.

"Speak low if you speak of love huh? I'm not surprised you know Shakespeare, you're such a nerd." He sneers, waving the book above his head.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about." You stutter, backing up. He grabs you by the collar of your shirt, lifting you into the air.

"Don't fuck with me!" He growls, dropping the book and kicking it to the side. "Who's Orpheus?"

"G-Greek hero. Musician." You stutter and he slaps you, hard. You can feel your cheek swelling under his fiery gaze.

"Don't even try me. Who. Is. Orpheus?"

"I don't know, I swear!" You mutter, wincing when you accidentally bite your cheek.

He drops you, watching as you scramble to your feet, backing away.

"This isn't over you little shit. I'll be back for you," he warns, giving your book one last kick for good measure before storming out of the library with Tony and Bucky on his heels.

You fall to your knees, silently sobbing as you crawl over too the book, dusting it off and hugging it to your chest.

Yelena sighs, her heart breaking as she watches you curl around the book protectively, lying on the floor.

-----------

"Where are you going?"

Yelena turns to find Nat, leaning against the school stairwell doorway, watching her.

"Just up to the roof. Need some fresh air," she lies, avoiding Nat's gaze. Nat lifts Yelena's chin up, staring into her eyes, boring into her very soul. Yelena squirms under her gaze until she finally lets go.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay." She smiles sadly at her little sister. "Just-" Her voice cracks as she pats her sister's shoulder. "Don't do anything stupid."

"Don't worry. I won't." She gives Nat a brief hug before hiking her pants up and starting up the stairs.

-----------

"Ah, well look who decided to join the party!" You look up from the ground to see Yelena, your eyes clouded with pain.

"No..." You croak but Steve pays no attention to you.

"Come to save your love Yelena?" He sneers, dropping you to the ground. "Or should I say... Orpheus?" Your eyes widen as you watch him advance towards her, pushing her closer to the edge of the roof.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She deadpans and Steve chuckles.

"Sure. If you won't admit, I'll just have to settle for destroying you from the inside out instead." He grabs her by the arm. "I haven't forgotten what you did to me." He points at a long thin scar along his jawline.

You watch as Tony sneaks up from behind Yelena, striking her with a metal bar. She crumples, falling to her knees.

"Hold her." Steve directs and Bucky dutifully grabs you by the arms. He holds Yelena's chin in between his thumb and forefinger, forcing her to look at him. "Now you watch as I destroy the one thing you love the most." Tony tosses his the metal bar and Steve prepares himself before swinging it like a baseball bat.

There's a sickening crunch followed by your scream as the bar makes contact with your ribs.

"Stop!" She struggles, her eyes never leaving your broken body as he hits you over and over again. "Please! Leave her alone!"

Steve smiles evilly, locking eyes with her before swinging the bat again. Another scream. Blood trickles down your face from your nose.

"Is that right? Did the famous Yelena Belova just beg me?" He smiles cruelly before pushing you down on your back, his foot on your chest. You scream as he increases the pressure, your broken ribs digging into your lungs.

Yelena screams, kicking Tony's legs out from under him before punching Steve in the jaw. She grabs the iron bar before it hits the ground, clobbering Bucky in the stomach before kicking Steve in the stomach.

"ты сука (you bitch)!" She steps on his face swiftly, taking satisfaction in the groan of pain he emits before turning to you, gently cradling your face.

"Wow... That was pretty badass," you mumble and she laughs, tearing up. You reach out, wiping the tears from her eyes. "Don't cry." She frowns.

"I'm not crying."

"You are too." You smile, wincing in pain. "I didn't know you knew Shakespeare."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let this happen." You frown, caressing her face, forcing her to look at you.

"Hey, hey. It's fine. Don't worry. I'll be fine." You attempt to smile reassuringly but it comes out as more of a grimace. "Listen, if I don't make it-"

"Don't say that! You can't leave me!"

"Shush, listen you thickheaded poet. If I don't make it, go back to the book." You instruct her. She frowns but you can her off. "Promise me."

"But-"

"Promise me."

"I promise..."

"Good." You smile at her, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead, your eyesight blurring. "Wait for me okay?" Your eyes flutter shut.

"No! No Y/N! Come back!" She shakes you roughly, sobbing when you don't respond.

----------

Yelena watches as your body is carted off under a white sheet. Nat stands to the side, watching as her sister stares off into the distance, all life drained from her body.

Go back to the book.

She stands, slowly trailing towards the library, her eyes bloodshot, cheeks caked with dry tears.

"Hi dear," the librarian greets her, discreetly wiping her eyes with a handkerchief. "What a shame. She was a lovely girl."

"She really was the best." Yelena agrees quietly, giving the librarian a small, comforting pat on the back before moving to the back of the library where she finds the book, lying on the floor.

Yelena,

I believe that we are the greatest love poem ever written. I love you always,

Y/N

A choked sob escapes her lips as she stares at the page. You knew. You knew the whole time and you didn't even say anything. A pair of soft arms wrap around Yelena's stomach as she lets go of the dam, her cries echoing throughout the library.

"I'm sorry..."

I'm sorry...

----------

Taglist: @username23345 @musicinourlips @gingerbreadcookieforlife @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @trikruismybitch @ima-gi--na-tion @nicole-rayleigh-hot @olsensnpm @peabrain112

[parkers-gal]

Heyy, i hope you are amazing and getting enough sleep and drinking enough water. But for the sleepover Can you have Tom and his brothers or cast mates reacting to readers (Ariana Grande) new video “34+35”. It doesn’t have to be smut seeing as how you don’t want to write smut.

i have a blurb where this is included in it, but if you want me to rewrite it you can send in the request again <3

requests are open

—

wc: 1.1k

Though Tom had helped you on some of the lyrics for the current tracks for your new studio album, he'd yet to hear any finished results or melodies (which was probably a good thing considering he started humming "needy," during a comic con event). 

You, as well as several of your friends from the studio, were gathered in Tom's living room, everyone spread out on their own seats. You were slightly nervous, worried about how the boys would react from your sudden switch from pop to R&B. 

"Ten minutes!" Harrison hollered from the kitchen, and a series of cheers went around as everyone continued what they were doing. It was a ritual, basically, to be together on release night like it was a New Year's countdown. Every new release meant the boys had something new to hear, so you also spent time going through each track and letting them decipher it as they pleased. 

An album was no different. 

Now, they'd already heard your leading single "positions," and you had to admit, their reactions when the words left your mouth were absolutely hilarious. 

You recalled the memory:

"Wait- what?" 

"Jesus Christ, Tom, you've turned her into a sex addict," Harry concluded. 

"I have- I have not!" 

You giggled, patting his shoulder while he processed the information. 

"Okay if it's not about sex then what's it about?" Harrison asked. 

You rolled your eyes, "I never said it wasn't about sex." 

"Oh," they concluded, each of their eyes widening. 

"I swear to god, Y/N, if you name drop me like you did Pete and Ri-'

"I didn't name drop anyone!" you laughed at him, hoping to relax him a little. "Tommy it's not like you're explicitly mentioned to be the inspiration. You just happen to have caused the lyrics, 's all." 

"That's gross," Harry interrupted. 

"Yeah, we don't need to hear about how much you love Tom's web shooter." 

___

"Five minutes!" Harrison shouted again. 

Tom had just returned from the kitchen, a fresh beer in his hand. He was coming over to you, sitting down softly and pulling you into his side, kissing your temple as you hummed. You intertwined your fingers, and he chuckled, giving your knuckles a kiss too. 

"You ready, love?"

"I think the question is 'are you ready?'" 

The two of you laughed just as Harrison and Harry had finally sat in their seats. They'd connected three wireless speakers to your phone, where you'd play the album for them for the first time. 

"Two minutes."

Tom looked down to you with a proud smile, and you pinched his cheeks. You found out later that Harry had captured the moment on film. 

Now, everyone was counting down the seconds, you included. Everyone was shouting excitedly, and you couldn't help but smile at the entire image. 

"Okay, okay," you quieted everyone. "Track number one: shut up. Are we ready?"

"Hell yeah," Harry raised his beer. 

"Hit it muchacha!"

You laughed, clicking the song. 

As the intro started, you saw each of their expressions. The beginning was sort of Disney-like, and quite easy to reminisce about childhood films. However, their expressions quickly changed once your voice rang through. 

You looked to Victoria with a satisfied grin, Tom's mouth agape and Harry's eyes wide as he tried not to spit out his beer.

"Guess it fuckin' just clicked one night," you sang along perfectly. 

Sam barely swallowed his drink before he spoke first. "Holy shit," he laughed. 

When the song ended, you paused the music, glancing to their faces in anticipation for one of them to speak first. 

"Well?" you smiled nervously. 

"It's quite.. Disney?"

"Yeah.." Harrison agreed with Sam. "But also very straight forward and holy shit you weren't playin' around."

"I quite like it," Tuwaine admitted. "It's very catchy."

"Okay, time for track two: 34+35."

"Oh man," Tom replied to you, putting his drink on the coffee table. "I've been dying to hear this one."

"Or at least know what it's about," Harry added. 

You rolled your eyes with a knowing-grin, clicking the track. They were quiet just as it started, but by the fourth line of verse one, they had finally figured out what it was about. 

"Fuck me till the daylight!" You sang, and Tom looked like he'd just wet his pants. 

"Baby you might need a seat belt when I ride it," you laughed with Tayla. 

Tuwaine seemed thoroughly amused by their reactions, playfully dancing along to the song. When the track came to a close, the realization seemed to have struck them just as you hummed out:

"Means I wanna 69 with ya... noooooo, shit." 

As you paused the song before the next track, Harrison was turning towards Tom with an open mouth, finger pointed to you. He wasn't forming words, and you giggled at them, encouraging them. 

"C'mon! Tell me what you think!" 

"I believe you when you said Tom is kinky," Harry deadpanned. 

Tom jutted his lip out, scrunching his brows together. "I am not! I have normal kinks!"

"I don't think 69 is a kink," Harrison concluded. 

"Or common," Sam pointed out. 

You laughed again, interrupting them. "It's not about Tom," you confessed. 

It was Tom's turn to look at you with wide eyes. "Are you just doing 69 with other gentlemen then?" 

"N-no," You spoke during laughs. "It's not from personal experience."

The five of them "oh'ed" and you laughed again with a nod. 

Forty minutes later and you were listening to the last track of the album, sad that it came so soon. 

"Ready?" 

"Let's do it," Harrison chugged the rest of his beer. Tom snuggled closer into your side and you kissed his cheek before pressing play. 

During this track, the boys didn't talk at all, which was peculiar to you. They didn't even react until you spoke once it ended. 

"Well? You guys were awful quiet? Do you like it-"

"It's really pretty," Tom confessed, a blush adorned on his cheek. 

"Yeah," Harry agreed. "It's almost soft compared to the rest." 

You nodded along, "Yeah, I'd think so too." 

"Who's it about?" Sam asked.  Your eyebrows went up, and he 'surrendered.'

"Well then," Harry stood up. "Congrats Y/N/N," he moved in to give you a hug and you returned it. "I'm gonna hit the sack." 

"Yeah same," Harrison said, repeating Harry's movements. 

By the time they'd all left, you and Tom were left alone cleaning up everything and washing dishes at one A.M.

"Can I ask who it's about?" 

"Which one?" You asked, scrubbing the bottom of a plate before handing it to him to rinse and dry. 

"The, uh- the last one." 

"Oh," you looked at the sponge in your hands. "It's about you." 

The tips of his ears reddened, and you had to will yourself not to laugh at it. 

"I really.. love it," he admitted almost bashfully, avoiding your gaze. 

"Well," you grabbed his hands despite the suds. "I really love you." 

[elianaroselight]

PEOPLE OF TUMBLR, I HAVE COME AT YOU WITH A STORY UNLIKE ANY YOU HAVE SEEN FROM ME!

@winterpower98 has just posted some beautiful images about CherryPie dates and I feel it is time to reveal a fic I wrote about these pics a while back. I love this couple with all of my heart. So enjoy!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cherry watched with a look of sweet amusement on her face. She had been out running errands with Ju Jing and Rascal so they could restock on some supplies for Ju Jing's bakery when they paused in front of a window to a fancy clothing store. Hanging on a mannequin was a beautiful silk hanfu. The under dress was a soft lavender with a white overcoat that was held closed by a light purple sash. The arms of the mannequin were posed to not only show off the wide sleeves of the overcoat, but to hold a long, lavender purple scarf that had been draped over the arms and circling behind the outfit. Delicately embroidered into the scarf and along the bottom half of the white coat were wisteria blossoms. Ju Jing had stopped to admire the hanfu and had been staring at it with a sweet smile. He lifts Kai Hu off of his head and holds him against his chest as he leans in to get a closer look at the outfit. Kai Hu was now looking at the dress as well and asking questions about it, to which his father happily answered. Cherry can feel a sweet warmth bloom in her chest as she watches the exchange, before they continue on their way. Her mind begins to wander a bit, thinking back to the amount of times he stopped to look at something that had an intricate design or details. It could be on clothing, a pastry, stonework or even woodwork. She couldn't help, but get the sense he enjoyed looking at the artistic details of the world around him. He really could find beauty in everything, couldn't he? 

Now that she had realized this, the desire to do something or give him something beautiful came barreling towards her. The two of them had begun courting recently and she had been working on designing and carving a courting bracelet for him to wear either on his horn or wrist. It would not be ready for some time though and she really wanted to do something sooner. As she was putting away the supplies they had gotten, an idea hit her. Ju Jing had asked if she would like to go on a date, to spend some time alone and get used to being in a relationship with one another. She definitely appreciated that he was wanting to take this slow for them both, him-healing from a devastating and traumatic tragedy and her-having never been in a courtship before. The plan was to meet in a beautiful field up the mountain a bit and stargaze with a few desserts Ju Jing was planning on making. She would have several hours to kill as it was barely past midday and they weren't meeting until later tonight. Having made her decision, she takes a deep breath and turns to Ju Jing with a soft smile. "I'm going to talk to my fuquin about something. Are you going to be okay making the food for tonight by yourself?" The tall oni looks at her with a grin. "Don't worry about me. I've got this. Kai is playing with your baba and his shadow, so I should be all good. Have fun with your fuquin. Meet you at the field later, okay?" She nods, happily. "I'll be there." He chuckles and kisses the top of her head before turning away to work on something, completely missing her blush.

After watching him for a moment with her cheeks warm, Cherry turns away and heads towards her parent's home. She chirps as she opens the door, receiving a response from the kitchen. She walks over to find the golden monkey she had been looking for at the sink as he was washing the dishes. He looks up at her with a warm smile. "Hello, my cherry blossom. How are you doing?" He says as he dries his hands before pulling her into a hug. She chuckles, hugging back. "I am good, fuquin. Actually, I have a question I was hoping you would be able to help me with." He pulls away with a happy grin. "Why, of course! Ask away!" She takes a deep breath. "So, you know that Ju Jing and I are courting now. Well..we have a date tonight. Our..f-first date." "Ooooooo! What are you planning on doing?" He asks excitedly, pulling out a chair at the table to sit while gesturing for her to join him. She giggles, blushing while sitting down as well. "Weelll. We plan on going to a nearby field and stargazing while eating a few desserts Ju Jing is making. And...well..I realized earlier today that Ju Jing seems to enjoy looking at intricate things and since this is my first date ever and the first one we are having together, I figured I should do something nice. Well, I guess it is more that I want to do something nice for him and I, but he has already said he was going to make the food, so I was trying to figure out what to do for it. But I didn't know what-" "Ri Shi. Ri Shi. Deep breath, sweetie. You're rambling."  

Wukong cuts in and lays a hand on her's. She takes a deep breath. "Right. Sorry." "No need to apologize, flower. Now what was your idea to make tonight a bit more special?" Cherry takes another deep breath, looking at their hands. "I want to wear something special tonight. Something fancy or intricate, but all I have are costumes for my dances. You like to dress all fancy, so I was wondering if you could help me find something to wear.." She looks up at Wukong as she finishes speaking, not all that surprised to find him grinning in excitement. He stands and pulls her towards his bedroom, tail wagging in excitement. Cherry lets out a soft giggle as she gets pulled along. Soon they were in the golden King's room. He lets her go and heads towards his closet, opening the door with a bit too much force. It was a hidden walk-in closet, which was odd by how massive it is. Clothes lined the walls with boxes of accessories on a shelf above. 

She lets out a gasp, looking at the amount of clothes her fuquin had. Wukong turns around to face her. "Choose whatever you want." Cherry looked at him, in shock. "You have so many!" He nods, grinning as she continues. "Is any of this women's clothing or is this all men's?" "No, No. The left side is all women's, the right holds all men's. You want a dress? A hanfu?" Wukong begins to ruffle through the garments as his daughter stares at him in pure shock for a minute more before snapping back into the present and walking over. She looks at the clothes, touching them gently as she feels very overwhelmed. "Uh-m.. I don't know where to begin..." He smiles softly, eyes reflecting an expression of understanding. "We have time. For now, let's look at each outfit and pull out the ones you express interest in. Okay?" She nods.

After searching through the clothing for next hour or two, they narrowed in on a hanfu that had caught Cherry's eye. Wukong quickly had her go try it on and a few minutes later, Cherry was looking herself over in the full length mirror back in her fuquin's room. The silk under dress was a soft yellow white that transitioned into a blush color towards the neckline. It had a turtleneck style neckline, was sleeveless and looked like it would extend down to her feet. On top of the dress, she wore a willow green silk robe that extended down to her knees and had an off-the-shoulder neckline. The sleeves poofed out before being cinched by a hem around her elbows. The hems of the jacket was made from a strip of a dark apple green fabric and along the bottom of the robe had delicate embroidery of cherry blossoms. Holding the Jacket closed was a large cherry pink belt. A light coral sash was tied around her waist and laid over the belt. A light melon colored sash draped down the front of the skirt until it hit about her knees. her wrists held golden cuffs with cloud like designs around the top edge of the cuff. It was attached to a soft silk satin sleeve that was the same blush color as the top of the dress and attached to the inside of the sleeves of the robe. She almost couldn't believe it was herself being reflected back from the mirror. A sweet smile appeared on her face as she looked herself over.

    Cherry is pulled out of her thoughts by a soft sniffling sound behind her. Turning around, she watches as Wukong wipes a nonexistent tear from his eye. "My precious baby girl is all grown up into a beautiful woman." She flushes and laughs at his words and actions. "Oh, hush." She grins at him before turning back to the mirror as Wukong steps closer. "What are you thinking, my sweet cherry pie?" He asks as he looks at her in the mirror and wraps an arm around her. She hums for a second. "I really like the outfit...Do you think Ju Jing will like it?" He raises an eyebrow at her. "You kidding? He is going to LOVE it!" Cherry laughs again at his enthusiasm as he grins happily. He pulls her towards the chair by a vanity table. "Now, sit. You want to make sure tonight's special, so let's make sure you feel like you look special." She nods and sits down.

    Wukong looks towards the door, speaking in a normal tone. "Macaque? Mango? Would you do me a huge favor? I know you are watching the little rascal right now, But would you please pick some flowers for me? I want to use them in Cherry's hair. Cherry blossoms might be best. Or any soft pink flower. Thank you! Love you!" He grins as he hears Cherry giggle at the declaration, both knowing full well the shadow monkey was probably blushing. He begins to groom her hair before brushing it out with a gentleness one would never expect to be possible for the strong monkey. Cherry begins to hum a song that got stuck in her head. Of all the songs, the fact it was a love song was quite amusing for her. Wukong smiles as he listens and soon finishes brushing before coming around to face her. He grabs an extra eyeliner and begins to draw the perfect wings to add emphasis to her eyes. Her tail waves back and forth happily before curling around Wukong's as the Monkey King pampers his daughter. 

    As Wukong finishes, both monkies hear the sound of walking coming towards them. They look towards the door as Macaque walks in with Kai on his hip and a basket of flowers in his hand. The shadow monkey pauses in his steps when he sees Cherry. Rascal squeals once he sees her as well, reaching out to her to be picked up. She smiles and reaches for him once Mac was able to get himself to walk closer. Rascal cheers happily, hugging Cherry tight. "Mama! Mama! You so prettys!" He giggles and grins up at her. She smiles, her tail letting go of Wukong's and wrapping around Kai's waist. "Why thank you, honey bun. Remember how your baba and I are going to go look at the stars tonight all by ourselves?" He nods, excited and intently listening. "Well…" She tucks some of his hair behind his ears. "I decided to dress all nice to surprise him. So don't tell him, okay?" Kai nods enthusiastically. She smiles and kisses his head before beginning to groom him. Macaque watches them in awe. It takes Wukong brushing his tail against the shadow monkie's to snap him out of his mind. 

Mac looks over at Wukong to receive a soft, knowing smile before the basket is taken from his hands. "Thank you for getting these for me, Mango flower." The golden monkey kisses Macaque's cheek, who gives him a warm smile back. "you're welcome, Peaches." He watches as Wukong moves to stand behind their daughter and set the basket of flowers on the table by him before speaking up again. "Actually, Rascal helped me pick them." Cherry and Wukong look up at him before looking back at Kai. Cherry smiles. "Really? Did you help Ye-Ye, Kai?" Rascal looks up at his mama and nods with a wide grin. She kisses his head. "Good job, my little cinnamon roll. You are such a good helper!" His grin widens and he snuggles into his mama's hold, listening to her soft purrs and humming as Wukong works on Cherry's hair. He braids it and tucks the cherry flowers into the strands after he ties the braid off with a green hair tie. Soon enough, he finishes and lays the braid on her shoulder. Cherry smiles up at him, cuddling a sleeping Rascal close. 

Wukong smiles warmly and reaches down to take the child into his arms before helping her up. He leads Cherry towards the mirror and watches as she stares at herself in shock. "That…. That's me?" She reaches up and touches her cheek gently. Meanwhile, Macaque reaches over to take Kai so Wukong could finish up with their daughter. Before he leaves, he comes over and kisses his daughter's head gently. "You look beautiful, Cherry-berry." She smiles happily at her Baba as she purrs happily at his words. Wukong comes up to her other side and wraps his arms around her. "I agree. Ju Jing is going to love it. I know I do and you know what? Keep the outfit. It suits you better than it ever did on me." Her eyes widen as she looks at him in surprise before giving him a tight hug. "Thank you, Fuquin! Thank you!" She whispers loudly into his chest, her purrs mixing in with his joyful ones as well. "Always, sweetheart. Now. It's about time for your date, yes? Let me take you there, so you are on time." "What about-" Macaque cuts in. "I will put Kai Hu to bed. You go and have fun with your new mate, okay?" She nods and kisses his cheek in thanks before hurrying out with her fuquin following behind once he gives his mate a kiss of his own. 

Wukong summons his cloud and helps her up before heading towards the field. Once they arrived, he helped her down. "Will you be okay here alone?" "Yes. Thank you for helping me, Fuquin." She kisses his cheek as Wukong smiles. "Of course, sweetheart. Have fun, but not too much fun." He laughs as he speeds off leaving her a sputtering and blushing mess. Cherry takes a deep breath to calm her nerves before she moves to sit down in the field of flowers, the Moon bright in the sky. She smiles and soon begins to sing the song she has had in her head all afternoon. 

A bit away, Ju Jing looks up when an angelic voice and beautiful melody hits his ears. He pauses, listening before smiling and heading towards the voice. He recognized the voice as Cherry's. "Ni wen wo ai ni you duo shen, Wo ai ni you jifen. (You asked me how deep my love is for you, I love you to the utmost). Wode qing ye Zhen, Wode ai yezhen: Yueliang daibiao wode xin. (My feeling is also true, My love is also true: The moon represents my heart)." 

Ju Jing smiles as he listens. He was closer to the voice now. He readjusts the basket in his hand, which held a blanket and several pastries that Ju Jing made for Cherry and himself to snack on tonight. The voice rings out again as he gets closer to it. "Ni wen wo ai ni you duo shen, Wo ai ni you jifen. Wode qing buyi, Wo de ai bu Bian: Yueliang daibiao wode xin. (You asked me how deep my love is for you, I love you to the utmost. My feelings will not waver, My love will never change: The moon represents my heart)."

Ju Jing rounds a tree and pauses in his walking. Before him a gorgeous monkey demon in a beautiful cream, blush and green hanfu outfit, was kneeling and looking up at the moon. Her hair was braided down the side of her head with cherry blossoms woven into it. Her fur was a beautiful white color, as if the color of the Moon and very softly glowed in the moonlight. Her face marking was a bright red and was quite similar to his dear girlfriend's mark. Ju Jing felt his breath leave him and his heart still when the beautiful maiden in front of him opened her mouth and an angelic voice rang out. "Qingqing de yige wen, Yijing dadong wode xin. Shenshen di yiduan qing, Jiaowo sinian dao rujin. (A gentle kiss Would already move my heart. A period of deep love Makes me long for it till now). Ni wen wo ai ni you duo shen, Wo ai ni you jifen. Ni chu xiangyixiang, Ni chu kanyikan: Yueliang daibiao wodexin. (You asked me how deep my love is for you, I love you to the utmost. Why don't you think about it, Why don't you take a look at it: The moon represents my heart).

After finishing her song, the gorgeous goddess, (for Ju Jing couldn't believe she wasn't a goddess), looks around her. Her eyes land on him and Ju Jing can feel his heart speed up. She looked just like Cherry, but with white fur. She smiles shyly and stands before calling his name. Ju Jing hesitates for a moment before it hits him. She looks like Cherry because she is Cherry. His jaw drops at the realization and a sweet giggle escapes her lips. She calls his name again and reaches out for him. He begins to walk over, gently setting the basket down nearby before reaching over and cupping her cheek gently in his hand. 

"Ri Shi? Is… is it really you?" The beautiful goddess in his hold chuckles softly as she reaches up to hold his hand that was cupping her cheek. She moves her head over and kisses his palm after answering him. "Of course it's me, silly." She said in a happy and light tone that pulled a smile from the tall oni. He pulls her face up to look at him as he leans in to give her a soft kiss. It was their first kiss and the moment couldn't have been more perfect for it. 

Nearby, Wukong stopped the recording he was making on his phone. He had secretly returned to film the moment Ju Jing saw his beautiful daughter. And was he glad he did. Now to leave the lovebirds he and show the video he caught to his mate. Giving the couple one last glance, Wukong smiles as his heart was filled with a warm joy at his baby girl, his Cherry Blossom, having found love and a family for herself. 

[smol-and-grumpy]

To Be Free - CH01

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Summary: Escaping and hiding away, that’s what she wants to do. Her parent’s remote cabin in the mountain sounds like the best place for it. There, she meets someone from her past — a green-eyed mountain man.

Chapter Warnings: A little back story, cheating (not Dean), language, threats being made, car accident

WC: 2481

Beta: @winchest09​ <3

A/N: So, this is the beginning of the Mountain Man!Dean AU. I hope you’ll like it!

Read ahead on Patreon!

Series Masterlist ~ SPN Masterlist

The phone buzzes on the seat next to her. Again. 

It hasn’t stopped ringing since Y/N had gotten into the car and drove away. She’s so close to just throwing it out of the window but then again, the rational side of her brain tells her that she would endanger the automobiles around her on the highway, and she doesn’t really want to cause any damage, or accidents, if it can be avoided. 

“You’re a goody-goody.” Mick always used to say, “It’ll get you in trouble if you don’t toughen up.” 

Perhaps Mick was right. She probably was not made to work in that firm where she has to help fucking criminals. But then again, he made it seem so plausible and she can’t believe that she fell for it all. Y/N had fallen for the prestige, for the fame, and most of all, she had fallen for Mick, and that was the worst fucking mistake. 

The events of that night flash before her eyes once more. 

It’s 9 PM. Mick usually doesn’t have a reason to work so late unless he has a meeting with the mob family that they have under their wings. She never liked to go to their meetings, always found an excuse to opt out. The way the men always stare at her like she was a piece of meat rather than a woman with a brain, always sent a chill down her spine. 

When she stepped out of the elevator, the floor was dark. There’s only minimal light coming from the reception area that’s vacated at this time of the night. Y/N never liked to be here after hours but it’s the only place she thought she could find Mick. He didn’t pick up his phone when she called him which was highly unusual. Somehow, she was a little afraid of what she would find. It could be him just laughing and joking with the mobsters, but it could also have been him bruised and beaten beyond recognition because the Family wasn’t happy with his work, or it could be worse. He could be dead. Today was his birthday too and she even ordered catering for the both of them to enjoy at home. She guessed that she would have to pop the dishes into the microwave because by the time she decided to check here, it was already starting to turn cold.

Walking further along the hallway, she noticed that the lights in Mick’s office are still on and a sense of relief washed over her, while the sense of dread built up in the pit of her stomach at the same time. 

“Oh god, Mick.” 

There was a faint moan that carried through the hallway of the offices. It made her blood freeze, but it forced her to walk faster.

“Mmh,” she heard Mick humming. “Always so fucking tight for me, Eve. Such a good pussy.” 

“Better than Y/N, I’d hope.” 

Mick chuckled, “I’d rather you not talk about her while I fuck you. You know you’re my best girl, baby.”

The dread in Y/N’s stomach intensified and something began to churn inside of her. She had to clutch it so as not to just hurl out the whole contents into the next pot plant she could find. 

Eve was her friend. Her best friend since she moved into the city two years ago. She was even the one who helped Eve to get a job at her boyfriend’s firm. 

Well, not her boyfriend anymore, she guessed. 

She reached the door, fingers clutched around the frame for purchase as she took in the image before her. Eve was bent over the table, Mick half undressed, fucking into her from behind. 

He threw his head back as he closed his eyes. When he opened them again, he turned his head and their eyes met. 

For a brief second, she thought she saw a smirk twisting at his lips when he noticed her. He kept on pounding into Eve, though, his pace never faltered. 

Y/N retreated, tears pooled in her eyes and she moved on autopilot. Before she knew it, she found herself in her office, packing the things that she needed into her laptop bag. 

‘Stupid! So fucking stupid!’ she thought. She should have seen it. Why hadn’t she seen it? The red flags were always there. Mick always gave her assignments that would see her traveling all over the country for a long stretch of time. She would find receipts of hotels laying around in the apartment, or when she did laundry, but he always had a good reason. They hadn’t been intimate for a long time, too. Mick was always too tired and if he wasn’t then she would be. And if that happened, he would get out of bed and said that he needed a drink and was out of the apartment before she could even say anything. She was so engrossed in her work and too oblivious to what was going on, that she ignored all the warning signs. 

She was crying now, the tears not stopping. But it’s not over Mick. She would never cry over a man who had treated her like this. She cried for herself, for being dumb enough to let someone play her. 

Bending down to pack the remainder of her things, she opened her last drawer, revealing a little safe that was neatly tucked inside. Without hesitation, she punched in the combination and it sprang open. It contained a single USB stick. 

Picking it up, she clutched it in the palm of her hand. She had forgotten about the small device and now she knew why Mick kept her around. She was the only person who had a copy of the shady business his clients are doing, because she was involved as much as Mick. He was never going to give her up because if the information got leaked, he'd be taking the fall. 

There were footsteps along the hallway, the thumping sounds getting louder as someone rushed to her office and she quickly let the stick slip into her jean pocket. 

“What are you doing?” he asked too casually but with a bitter undertone, acting like he hadn’t just fucked her best friend. 

“What does it look like?” she snarled, patience wearing thin. “I quit. And don’t even come by my apartment anymore.”

He walked in further; his hair was ruffled and the buttons on his shirt were hastily done up, the material lopsided as he had fastened them wrong. She was so disgusted by his appearance.

Mick rubbed his hand over his chin, carefully thinking about his next words. “I need the USB stick before you leave.” 

She snorted. That’s typical. All he could think about is his fucking business. “I don’t have it.”

“Liar!”

“Oh, look who’s talking.” Maybe, just maybe, she shouldn’t anger him but screw that.

“Y/N.” Mick rounded up around her desk and came to stand right before her. The scent of sex hit her nose in waves. It made her nauseous. “You’re going to get into so much trouble if they know that you have it and believe me, if you walk out of here, they will find out because I will tell them.”

“I’m not scared of those men.”

Mick laughed. Fucking laughed. 

“They’ll come for you, Y/N. Those men are not to be fucked with.” He was still chuckling when he said, “They will find you and they will kill you.”

She cocked her eyebrow, and maybe she should have been scared of Mick and his threats but she’s still got the upper hand. If she got to expose him first, she has bargaining leverage. Maybe she’d get to be in a witness protection program. By the time it hits the fan, she will hopefully be long gone. 

“I don’t have it,” she said again as she bumped her shoulder against his on her way out, shoving him to the side. 

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you!” Mick called after her, his voice echoing in the almost empty hallway. 

With her head held high, she descended the stairs, too impatient and not to say scared to wait for the elevator.

 The phone buzzed again after having only stopped for a short time. It actually hasn’t stopped ringing since she drove back to her apartment to pack her duffel with enough clothes that should last her for a couple of days. She wanted to get out of here, clear her head, think about what to do next. 

It’s after she stopped for gas that she remembered the remote cabin that belonged to her parents. They hadn’t been up there for a while as the health of her father was deteriorating but she knew where they kept the spare key, and it’s the only place she knew nobody would come looking for her because she hadn’t been with Mick long enough to let him in on the existence of the cabin, nor on the memories the place held.

Buying enough food that would last her a couple of days, she drove towards the foot of the mountain. 

It was February and the roads were icy as it had snowed just last night. She hoped that her car would have enough power to get her up there, as she didn’t have snow chains with her. Not that she knew how to put them on in the first place. If worse comes to worst, she’d have to abandon her car and hike up the last bit, which was totally fine with her too. Anything to get away from civilization.

As she made her way up the snowy road and rounded up the twelfth bend in the street (There were fourteen - she had counted them from the drive up there every winter), her phone buzzed again. 

She glanced over to the passenger seat to catch the caller ID. It could be her mother for all she knew and that one, she would pick up. Y/N would maybe tell her that she was on the way to the cabin so that they wouldn’t be too worried if they can’t get a hold of her, because the reception could be pretty spotty up there.

But no, it’s fucking Mick again. She rolled her eyes upon seeing the name flash on the screen before turning her gaze back to the snow-covered street in front of her, but it was already too late. Out of her periphery, she caught it. The deer that ran out of the woods, its eyes wide when it saw the headlights of her SUV. Her foot hit the break immediately, but it was too late. The car swerved on the icy ground and she hoped she didn’t hit the animal before her vision goes black.

  Dean was sitting in his recliner in the cabin while he enjoyed his glass of bourbon. It’s his downtime, one of his favorite pastimes, next to spending his days out with Stevie, his Bernese mountain dog.

He had been coming to this cabin since his early childhood, having only missed one Winter out of the many. There were times where he would only spend a week up here but also there were times where he would be there for the whole winter. It’s his favorite place, always has been. 

The cabin is not as big as the ones that surrounded it, but it’s enough. It has only one bedroom, yet it was cozy. He remembered back to when he was younger, when he and his younger brother would sleep on the fold-out couch while his parents took the bedroom. Sometimes if Sam was upset with him, Dean would spend the night on the rug in front of the fireplace instead, and it was the best thing. He almost felt bad for wanting to get into a fight with Sam more often so that his sibling wouldn’t look at him funny when he wanted to spend the night on the floor instead of on the worn-out couch.

Once his parents stopped their annual visit up there, and they wanted to sell the cabin, Dean had saved enough money to buy it from them. There were just too many memories tied to the little property, too many of them that he wasn’t willing to just forget. 

While he took a sip from his tumbler, Stevie lifted her head and twisted her ears. 

Dean noticed, and immediately reached down to pat the dog's head, “What's wrong, Stevie?” 

The dog ignored him to get up and walk over to the door, letting out a whine as her nails started to scratch at the wood. 

“Easy, girl,” he soothes the agitated dog. “You wanna go out for a walk again?” 

Stevie whined some more, her scratching becoming more frantic. 

“Right,” Dean sighed as he got out of his seat. He took his time to empty his tumbler before setting it down on the coffee table. “Let’s go then.” 

The snow had started to fall again as they got out of the cabin, and he ducked inside once more to grab his hat that’s hanging on the hook right behind the door. Stevie was not impressed that it was taking Dean so long to get ready and started to bark.

“Easy, Stevie,” he chuckled as her wet nose nuzzled against his palm. He reached down to scratch behind her ear, a motion that seemed to calm her down. “Good girl.” 

They made their way down the street. The old snow crunched underneath his boots. Fresh layers of the white powder would cover over it soon enough, erasing their prints when it settled. He thought about doing their usual nightly walk around the perimeter, wondering if maybe they’d see a deer or two. Stevie had a way with deer. They love to meet her and Dean’s always mesmerized by the unusual bond they had. Stevie was always good with other animals and people, the dog’s sense to protect everyone is highly admirable, and Dean really couldn’t wish for a better companion.

As they rounded up the second bend in the road, he saw the car. Its headlights were still on but the front was wrapped around a tree which was the only thing standing between the car and the abyss. It was not a strong pine and the wood was already creaking under the weight.

Stevie rushed forward and Dean followed suit. The tree was going to give in at any minute, he just knew and if he couldn’t save the car, maybe he would be able to save whoever was stuck in there.

Dean thankfully reached the vehicle in time, yanking the driver’s door open and the sight of the girl slumped over the steering wheel made his blood run colder than the icy road he was standing on. 

“Y/N?” 

CH02

Please share your thoughts with me, I’d love to hear your feedback.

​

[ikeromantic]

Bonding

A Mitsuhide Akechi fanfic, approx. 1800 words. This scene takes place well after the events of the Romantic Epilogue as part of my post-route headcanon storyline.

First: Mitsuhide and the Maiden

Previous: In the Spotlight

Mitsuhide sat on the edge of a stuffed chair, a ‘sofa’, across from his little one’s father. Minoru, for his part, didn’t look any more comfortable with the company. Neither of them said anything. Mitsuhide found that his usual silver tongue had run out of witticisms when faced with the twin challenge of a world 500 years in the future and the need to impress the father of his beloved.

In the kitchen, the chatelaine and her mother Youko were making dinner. Their lively chatter was the only sound as the two men studied each other.

Finally, Minoru cleared his throat. “So. How did you two meet?”

“The answer to that would require additional explanation. Suffice it to say, I met her in the course of my work. Initially, she was a responsibility of mine. To train her so that she knew enough to stay ali- ah, safe.” Mitsuhide smiled. “She was quite a handful.”

Minoru frowned. “Safe? Safe from what? What kind of business are you in?” He leaned forward.

“Intelligence and information gathering.” He silently thanked Sarutobi for the modern words to describe being a spy and torturer.

“You work for a government?”

Mitsuhide nodded. “That is a good way to put it. Yes. For a government.”

His little mouse poked her head through the door. “Everything going ok, you two?”

Both men cleared their expressions and smiled over at her. “Yes,” they replied, almost in unison.

Her bright smile lit up the room. “I’m so glad. I wanted you two to get along. Anyway, dinner is almost ready!” She disappeared again and the smiles the two men wore faded like snow under a noon-day sun.

Minoru turned back to Mitsuhide. “How did my daughter get tangled up with some government agent? She designs clothes. She left for a job in fashion.” His voice is strained, half a year’s worth of worry and frustration pushing at the seams of his soul.

Mitsuhide nodded. “She is amazing at making clothing. That is a career she continues to pursue. But I met her the night she pulled my superior from a burning building. Had she not arrived when she did, he would have died.”

“My baby girl . . . pulled a man from a burning building?” Minoru’s eyebrows shot up, his expression one of incredulous disbelief.

“Yes, and after, he thought she should stay with our forces. For her protection and because he believed there was something special about her.” Mitsuhide’s thin smile reappeared. “He wasn’t wrong. She is very special. A wonder.”

Minoru coughed. “Well, yes, but . . . a burning building? She isn’t, that is, she wouldn’t just -”

Mitsuhide leaned forward. “You know her from her childhood. If she knew someone was going to burn to death and she had a chance to save them, would she leave them to die? Is it so unbelievable?”

He shook his head slowly. He knew his daughter was exactly the kind of girl to put herself at risk for another. “I should not be surprised. When she was five, she ran out into the street to stop traffic for a kitten. Almost got hit by a car. And it wasn’t until after the cat was safe that she even realized how close she came to dying.”

Both men chuckled.

“That sounds exactly like something my little mouse would do.”

Minoru scowled. “Your what?”

“A nickname,” Mitsuhide waved the comment off.

And then the call came for dinner. They all sat down around the table. A spread of familiar and strange foods that piqued Mitsuhide’s curiosity. He wondered which of these his beloved had made, and which her mother. To be safe, he thought, it would be wise to compliment every dish.

“So,” her mother began after everyone was served. “My daughter tells me you’re a warlord working for Oda Nobunaga?”

Mitsuhide choked in surprise, the bite of food sticking in his throat. He glanced at his little mouse for confirmation.

“It just sort of popped out while we were talking.”

With effort and a glass of water, Mitsuhide swallowed and cleared his throat. “I didn’t expect to bring this up until after dinner, but yes.”

Minoru scowled. “You’re telling me you work for a man 500 years dead?”

“I don’t know, he seemed pretty lively last time I saw him,” Mitsuhide quipped.

His little mouse grinned. “Papa, be nice! I told you, we will tell you everything.” She took a deep breath. “It started the day I arrived in Kyoto. I went sightseeing . . .”

Mitsuhide listened as attentively as her parents, this version of the tale filling in gaps and details he hadn’t known. Her timely rescue of Sasuke Sarutobi, her run-in with the forces from Kasugayama. It appeared his little one was better at keeping secrets that he’d credited.

Through the story, her mother made little sounds of agreement or surprise, but Minoru was deathly silent. His expression turned darker at every part until he couldn’t hold back anymore. “This sounds like some ridiculous cartoon! You can’t expect your mother and I to buy this. Tell the truth! What is he, some mafia? A gambler? What?”

Youko frowned at him from across the table. “Now you just hush and eat your food. If our little girl says this is what happened, I believe her. She has no reason to lie. She knows we support her no matter what. Don’t we, dear?”

Minoru’s brows lowered. “You can’t be serious. This, this man shows up with our daughter after months with no word! Not a letter! Not a post card! With this crazy story and we’re supposed to just -”

“Accept it. You know as well as I do that if our girl didn’t write or call, it’s because she couldn’t. When you think of it that way, it makes perfect sense.” Youko nodded to emphasize her point. “Besides, when have you ever known her to lie.”

“She’s terrible at that,” Mitsuhide added drily.

Minoru’s scowl deepened. “Don’t talk like you know her. Maybe you drugged her or something, and now she thinks all that is true.”

Mitsuhide sighed. He’d expected this kind of reaction after Sasuke and his little one explained what ‘meeting the parents’ entailed. He was beginning to wish he could have simply sent some gifts and a contract, or better yet, left that to Nobunaga and simply married the girl. “We did bring some proof with us today, and we have friends tomorrow who can vouch for everything.”

Youko gave Mitsuhide an encouraging smile. “Why don’t you go get it? I’m sure it will make Mino a little less grouchy.”

“I’m not grouchy,” Minoru grumbled.

“You are, papa. But it’s ok. This is really all my fault. I wish I’d been able to call you both. I missed you so much.”

Her father swallowed whatever he’d planned to say, touched by his daughter’s affection.

Mitsuhide went to their bags and grabbed his sword and the clothes he’d arrived in. He carried them back to the dining area. These were unlikely to be enough, he thought, but it wasn’t as if they’d planned to be swept to this time that night.

“Our clothes -” he set them down, “and my sword.”

Minoru poked at the clothing, unimpressed. The sword, however, got his attention. “This . . . it isn’t just some decorative piece . . .” The words were quiet, said more to himself than anyone.

Still, Mitsuhide answered. “No. That blade has taken many lives.”

“And saved some too,” his little mouse added. “Mine included.”

Minoru looked between the two of them. “Maybe you’ve both lost your minds. This thing -” He pointed at the sword, “is clearly an antique, but that proves nothing.”

“You are so stubborn,” Youko huffed.

Mitsuhide was beginning to see where his little one got that quality. Sweetness from her mother, stubbornness from her father. It made him smile.

***

Miyake and Sasuke sat at a nearby bar, drinks in hand.

“So this is called karaoke?” Miyake eyed the screen with words that moved and then emptied his sake cup. “And I can sing whatever I want?”

“Not whatever. I doubt they have any songs you know on file. But I think the enjoyment quotient will still be high.” Sasuke began tapping through the song selection, his expression focused. He stopped when he came across one with the image of a pink-faced girl. “This one.”

Miyake shrugged. “Alright.”

The music started. It sounded nothing like the instruments Miyake knew, or the rhythms and beats that were familiar to him. Still, he could pick out the melody, and it was nice - if strange.

The first word on the screen lit up and Sasuke started singing. His voice was surprisingly pleasant, even though the lyrics were senseless.

Miyake joined him on the next verse, nodding to the beat. It was a cheerful tune, he thought. Perfect to drink to. He poured another glass for himself and the ninja.

They emptied that and another as the song ended. The next pick was Miyake’s. He chose one based on the picture, a cute girl in a ridiculously short skirt.

“This is the theme song for my favorite anime,” Sasuke grinned.

“Then I picked a good one?”

Sasuke patted his arm. “A great one.”

Two hours later, both of them were too drunk to walk straight. Their singing got louder as their ability to pronounce the lyrics dwindled.

“Todokete atsuku naru omi . . .” The song dissolved into drunken laughter.

Miyake threw an arm around Sasuke. “Y-you’re my besht - besht fren.”

Sasuke leaned into the hug. “N-now I have two! Two besht frienz - friends.” He grinned but the expression slid into a sad frown.

“Wha - what ish it?” Miyake peered at the ninja’s face. “Need more sake?”

“I - I wish my other fren wash here,” Sasuke hiccuped. “An Shingen. I wash goin- going to take him to a hoshpital.”

Miyake nodded, though he didn’t understand. “Maybe nexsht time?”

“If he livesh,” Sasuke sighed.

“To Shingen,” Miyake poured them another round of sake. “And nexsht time!”

They drank to the toast.

Sasuke poured another. “And to friendsh we lef-left behind.”

They drank to that too.

After several more toasts that grew further away from the original point - to short skirts and lady’s stockings, to coffee, to the karaoke bar - the two men finally paid their tab and stumbled to the hotel.

Miyake nearly puked on the elevator, as the movement made his stomach flip. He would have taken the stairs, if he thought he could find the steps. He leaned on Sasuke as they walked down the hall. It felt like their room was miles away.

Sarutobi fumbled with the lock, and when the door opened, they fell inside.

Between leaning on each other and the walls, they managed to stand again.

“I’m go-gonna shower,” Miyake mumbled.

“Me nexsht,” Sasuke agreed. He tripped toward the beds and fell into the nearest one, face first.

Miyake made it to the shower, but didn’t manage to turn it on. He slumped to the floor and leaned his head back on the cool tiles, falling into a deep sleep.

Next: Middle Ground

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Pull

Sequel to Push

Warnings: noncon sex, oral, violence, abuse, and death.

This is Lee Bodecker (who is already dark!af) and explicit. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: The sheriff keeps coming around.

Note: Okay, so probably a three-parter. I didn’t intend for this to go beyond a one shot but same old story, eh.

Hope you enjoy it. Thank you. Love you guys!

Please leave some feedback, like and reblog <3

“Oh what the hell she says I just can't win for losing And she lays back down”

-Her Diamonds, Rob Thomas

🚔

You stared out the window. The trees along the edge of the yard were pale and barren, a sheet of frost laid over the ground. There was a wailing in your head. The tears blurred your vision and your fingernails curled into the lip of the sink.

"Goddamn it, girl," you flinched at your father's voice. "The kettle's fucking screaming."

You pushed yourself away from the sink and shook away the haze. You turned the knob and moved the kettle to the front burner. You took off the lid of the percolator and poured the piping water inside. You left the coffee to brew and turned your back to the stove.

"Are you alright?" Will asked as he cut up his eggs with his fork.

"She's fine. She just ain't wanna do her work." Your father growled through a mouthful. "Way she's been draggin' her ass lately like the rest of us ain't work a lot harder than rinsing a pan or sweeping a dang floor."

"I've been doing all that, daddy." You cringed after you spoke. Not just because you knew you're father wouldn't like it but because that word, 'daddy', tickled that memory in the back of your head.

"Try to do it without makin' a bigger mess," he snarled. "Your ma raised you better. She was still here, she'd be shakin' her head."

Not just at me, you thought but kept it to yourself. You turned and filled the four cups lined up with coffee. You set each before the men at the table. Your brothers thanked you, your father grumbled for the sugar. You set the dish in the centre of the table and backed away. 

You would eat after them. A bowl of porridge with cinnamon as your daddy went to his shed and the boys drove into town. Your only peace for the day although you hadn't had any since that night.

Six days. You counted each in your head. Laying in your bed, sleepless. Even after almost a week, you still felt the Sheriff's intrusion. You were still sore; bruises on your ass and thighs, a hole deep in your being. You closed your eyes and you were bent over the chair or the table. Your skin crawled and your stomach flipped. You couldn't shake the terrible shadow from your mind.

They left without ado, the boys in an argument over Mr. Calver's new car and what year it was. You cleared the table and sat to make yourself eat. It was hard but after a two day fast, you'd almost passed out against the burning stove. So you ate without tasting and washed the dishes.

You found yourself gazing out the window again. Snow began to fall and you shivered. You looked down, your hands mindlessly in the dishwater that had long turned cold. You pulled the plug and dried your pruned hands. 

The gravel crunched outside as the wind battered flakes against the window panes.

Your heart dropped. It used to be weeks between visits, sometimes a whole month. As of late, Sheriff Bodecker had taken to visiting more often. You were never very vain but you suspected it might be on your account. How could it not be?

You went to the door and peeked out the tall window beside it. It was him. The lights atop the cruiser and the emblem painted across the door. It was early but every visit was unexpected.

He looked at the house and you let go of the curtain. You pressed yourself to the door and listened. His footsteps trailed away and he knocked on the shed door. Your father answered in his usual gruff demeanor.

You felt brittle as you pushed away from the door. You walked to the stairs and looked up. The carpet was worn away by years of steps taken up and down. You leaned against the railing as you climbed. Don’t think about the man below and perhaps he wouldn’t think of you.

You took a cloth from the linen closet at the end of the hall and began to wipe down the plates that decorated the wall. Each was painted with a landmark; Niagara Falls, the Eiffel Tower, the Statue of Liberty, the Pyramids in Giza. You focused on cleaning each, even as your hands shook and your legs threatened to crumple.

His hands on you, his sickly sweet breath, his body crushed against you. You gripped the plate with the image of the Coliseum. You stared at the hundreds of windows, the falling facade. Your eye overflowed and the door below slammed.

You sniffed and set the plate back in the hooks. You wiped your eyes with the sleeve of your sweater and wiped the top of the side table. Thick soles climbed the stairs and a figure stopped in your peripheral. You turned as Lee peered down at you, fingering the heel of his gun as he neared.

“Your pa said I could use the facility,” he said.

“Behind me,” you said quietly as you picked up the vase and wiped the inside. 

“What’re you doin’? Tryna hide from me up here?” He tapped two fingers on the table.

You shook your head and put the pot down. You looked at the old sepia picture of your parents beside it.

“You know, I was wanting to come back sooner but… duty calls.” He lowered his voice as he leaned close, “There’s not much to do sittin’ around in the cruiser. I end up thinking of you. Wishin’ it was your hand down my pants instead of mine.”

“Sheriff,” you breathed. “Please, don’t--”

“You mad ‘cause I been gone, I get it. Not right of a man to be with a woman than just leave her waitin’,” he touched your cheek as you looked away. “You smell nice.”

“You better do your business and get goin’, sheriff,” you uttered. “I got laundry to do.”

“No point in actin’ all coy anymore,” his hand stretched over your jaw and he forced you to look at him. “And I can’t hold out much longer. You remember the river, where I take my break, you meet me there at midnight, after your pa’s asleep.”

“It’s snowing,” you argued.

“I don’t care if it’s a goddamn blizzard. You come find me or I find you,” he snarled and his hand slipped down to the top of your dress. He undid the top two buttons and squeezed your tits together as he watched them with a lewd leer. “I gotta pay more attention to these… but that ass is so nice.”

“My daddy--”

“Half drunk, as usual,” he huffed, “I could fuck you on his bed right now and he’d be none the wiser.” He purred and admired your tits as he bounced them. “Midnight… I’ll keep the car warm for you.”

He winked and dropped his hands, his palm brushing over the front of his pants and causing him to groan. He turned away and unbuckled his pants as he entered the bathroom. He kicked the door closed and you whimpered.

If your daddy found out what had happened, even if it was the Sheriff, he’d string you up by your knickers.

🚔

You found the flashlight under the stairs and waited until the house was filled with snores. The old standing clock ticked as you counted down the hours sat on the stairs across from the front door. The snow wasn’t thick but enough to make it slippery. With the night, the temperature dropped and seeped in around the windows. It would take you a while to get through the woods.

You opened the front door carefully. You wore the old hand-me-down coat and your heavy boots. You hated the forest after dark. When you were kids, your older brothers like to tell tales of grisly murders and other atrocious acts there. You’d since learn much of those were fantasy but it didn’t make them any less sinister.

You flipped the flashlight on as you neared the trees. You hit it twice to get the bulb alight. You pointed it ahead of you and followed the glow like a beacon. If your daddy knew what you were about, if your mama was alive to know it… you could hardly bear it yourself.

Your teeth chattered as the bitter wind swept under your skirt and you crossed your free arm over your middle. You hunched against the cold as flakes began to fall once more. You heard the river ahead of you and came out onto the dirty shore.

Bodecker’s cruiser sat waiting, his flashlight on the dash as it lit up the interior. You saw him in the yellow haze as you neared. He got out as he spotted you and rounded the car. His breath fogged before him and he rubbed his hands together.

“Got the heat on, not that you’ll be cold for long,” he said, “Come on,” he opened the back door and reached for the flashlight. You handed it to him as he waved you into the car. “On your back.”

He was out of pretense, out of patience. You sat and shimmied back on the seat. He got in behind you and pulled the door closed as he huddled on his knees on the seat. He was bent awkwardly as he grabbed at your skirt.

“Common, let’s get these off,” he reached up and grabbed the waist of your wool tights and jolted them down your thighs. “It’s so fucking cold. I don’t know we can keep to the car through the winter.” He left your tights at your knees and tore down your underwear. He pushed your legs up so they hung around him, the wool stretched across his stomach. “There’s a hotel in town. We can drive in…”

His voice trailed off as he fumbled with his pants. He grunted and planted a hand beside your head as he bent over you. He slapped the tip of his cock against your cunt as you turned your face away from him. You pressed your lips together. Better to have it done with.

“What’s the matter, girl?” He grabbed your chin and turned your head. “Open your eyes…” he rubbed his nose against yours and pushed against your entrance. “Look at your daddy, girl.”

“Please--” You opened your eyes and begged. “Please, don’t make--”

He impaled you and let out a long groan. You yelped and as you curled beneath him and he sank to his limit. It hurt just as much as before. He hit the same bruises as he began to thrust.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he said with each tilt of his hips, “You don’t know how I’ve been thinking about you.”

He pushed himself up as he continued to move against you. He unzipped your coat and unbuttoned your blouse with some difficulty. He ripped your jacket, shirt, and brassiere strap down your shoulder. He grabbed your tit as it fell loose and toyed with your nipple. He flicked with his thumb and circled the hard nub.

“You need to dress yourself up, girl,” He purred between thick breaths. “Show off what you got. Just for me, no one else.”

“I can’t-- I can’t--” You squealed as he sped up and sent a pang up your spine. “Ow, ow, ow.”

“I ain’t care about your pa,” he murmured, “I’ll buy you something nice, hmmm? Then I can fuck you in that.”

You blinked away the tears as they threatened. This man could use your body but he wouldn’t see you cry. You hadn’t truly done that since your mama’s funeral. 

The car rocked with him. He crushed you into the seat as his feet hit the door. He was too tall to be crammed in the back of the cruiser atop you but it barely seemed to matter. The leather of his coat squeaked as he hammered into you and the scent of his sweat permeated the air. 

He dropped down on you, smothering you as his hips kept going. He nuzzled your ear and gave a throaty grunt. He came and slapped the seat beside your head. He slowed and went limp over you, out of breath as he shuddered.

“Mmm, can I use my cuffs on you next time, girl?” He lifted his head and tickled your temple. “Hmm? You can be my perp?”

You stared at him, mortified. You nodded, unable to speak.

“Tomorrow,” he rasped, “I won’t wait another week.”

🚔

Your nights belonged to the Sheriff and the days had never truly been your own. Two weeks of his sick game, trekking through the dark, cold woods to his cruiser by the frozen river. Face down on his seat, cuffs behind your back, him behind you, on top of you.

That day, he’d been by to see your father. He found you in the kitchen before he went. “Forget the underwear tonight, girl.” That was all he said before he left you to dread him again.

The same path, the same bobbing light before you, the knot deep in your gut. You were as sick with yourself as you were with him. You let him use you. Maybe you didn’t have a choice but you didn’t fight. You just laid there and waited for him to finish.

As you walked through the woods, you still jumped at every snapped twig and every rustle. It all seemed louder that night. The wind was wild and the branches shook above, no leaves left to block the moonlight.

He took your jacket off that night. You shivered and he cuffed your hands behind your back. He bent you over the hood and hiked up your skirt. Your thigh highs began to sag as he entered you. Your cheek nearly stuck to the cold metal of the car as he pushed your head down.

“Fuck yeah, girl, you like when daddy fucks you?” He snarled as he slapped your ass. The open zipper of his jacket brushed your skin and his pants scratched the top of your thighs. “Hmm, you like being a whore?” He tugged on the cuffs as he fucked you harder. “That’s it.”

He snorted and slowed. You sensed a disturbance and he reached to his loose belt.

“Who’s there?” He called out as he slipped out of you.

“I fucking knew you was sneakin’ around,” Your father’s voice cut through the air. “Might be with a policeman but it don’t make it any better, you tramp.”

You tried to stand and Bodecker pushed you back down. “She’s a grown woman and times are changin’, Rhett. Why don’t you go back home? You know I’ll get her there safe.”

“Home? Uh uh, she can stay out in the cold. I won’t have no whore under my roof.”

“Now, let’s not be rash, Rhett, I’ll take care of her. You won’t have to. I was just--”

“Everyone knows about you, Lee,” your father barked, “This where you take your other whores?”

“I’m a changed man,” Bodecker insisted and you heard a subtle snap. You watched as their shadows got closer in the dark lit up only by the flashlight thrown onto the ground. “She’s--”

“You can keep her. Maybe you can find a man who will buy or sell her when you’re done.”

“Don’t be sayin’ that--”

“You fat fuck, don’t you--”

You were deafened by the sudden bang and your ears rang as your father’s body slumped to the floor. You stood with some trouble and stumbled back. You heard your father gasping as he twitched in the dirt. Bodecker turned and caught you before you could stepped away from the hood.

“I didn’t tell you to get up,” He growled as he bent you over the hood again.

“Daddy!” You cried out. “What did you do? Daddy--”

“I told you,” he pressed the gun to your head and poked around until he slid back inside you, “He ain’t your daddy no more.”

Your boots kicked in the dirt as he fucked you. The cold metal of the gun had you frozen, your eyes on your father’s body as the life slowly drained from him. You closed your eyes as his last, moist breaths escaped him. You bit down; you couldn’t cry, not even then.

You didn’t even notice as Bodecker finished and backed away. As his cum leaked from you and your legs folded. You fell onto the cold ground and he hauled you up into the back seat. He slammed the door and got in the front.

“Daddy…” You muttered.

“Pity. You never know what scoundrels are hanging out in the woods after dark,” Bodecker said as he started the car. “That’s some bad news to wake up to, isn’t is, girl?”

“Wh-why-why?” You stammered.

“Shhhh, you gotta be quiet, girl,” he coaxed, “‘Specially when drop you off. Better not wake any of your brothers, right?” He was quiet for a moment and cleared his throat loudly, “Right?”

“Right,” you whispered as your sticky thighs rubbed together, “Right, right, right…”

🚔

“Now, girl, you go inside and put your clothes in a bag and wash yourself up.” Those were Bodecker’s instructions as he dropped you off. 

You didn’t remember doing it but you awoke with damp sheets and a bag by your bed. You rolled over, stiff from the night spent tense and rolling back and forth. It hadn’t really been sleep. More shock.

You laid there. Numb. You heard the gurgling again. Saw the lifeless black form of your father’s body in the dirt. It wasn’t real. You’d go downstairs and he’d be there. Once you put on the coffee he’d get up and demand a cup. It couldn’t be real.

You sat up and kicked the bag under your bed. You wore the grey dress with the pleats, a black sweater over it, with black stockings, and your mary janes. You descended the stairs one at a time and put the kettle on the stove. You stared out the window. It had snowed more in the last hours of the night.

You got out the tray of eggs and the sausages. You searched for the large skillet and Will walked in with a yawn. He was always the first up. You stared at him as he sat at the table. You tried to say something, maybe you said ‘good morning’, and then you went back to your work.

Arn and Cal came shortly after. None of the three mentioned your father’s absence. It wasn’t that unusual. Sometimes he drank too much, sometimes he had been up for hours or hadn’t slept at all. You served them and added the bacon grease to the jar of lard.

Where was he? He couldn’t be there. In the dirt. In his own blood. Dead. No, he was going to come right through that door.

You heard the tires before the knock. Your heart raced as reality closed in around you. Arn got up to answer it and came back with the sheriff. He didn’t even acknowledge you as he nodded at the men around the table.

“Pa’s not awake yet,” Will said and chewed the edge of a strip of bacon.

“Well, I think…” Bodecker hooked his thumb in his belt, his stomach sticking out awkwardly, “I think we need to talk about your pa. Can I sit?”

“Course, sir,” Cal said, “Should be enough fixins if you want some.”

“No, no thank you,” Bodecker sat heavily and sighed. He was an effective actor. “Look, your pa… well, we don’t know exactly what happened but… we all agree he must’ve been drunk.”

“What’s goin’ on?” Arn snipped, “What do you mean? Pa is here--”

“You remember when he went to bed last night?” Bodecker asked.

“Well…” Cal frowned and looked at his brother. “Well, I think I laid down before him.”

“Me too,” Arn said.

“I’m always the first asleep,” Will added. “Same with my sister.”

You gulped as the sheriff finally looked at you. “Well, you know we had them flyers around town for the longest time about the woods. About the criminals we got hangin’ around these days and there’s really no easy way for me to say it but it looks like your pa ran into one of them last night.”

“All the way out in the woods? But why?” Cal asked.

Arn’s nostrils flared as he shook his head. “Because he got no sense. You remember last summer. We found him face down in a bog out there. Took the three of us to get him out.”

“Yeah, but so late…”

“You know how he’s been since ma.” Will intoned.

You were dizzy. You grabbed onto the counter as your legs turned to liquid and you cried out. “No!” You fell to your knees and touched your forehead. You knew it was real, you’d seen it, but you had wanted so badly for it to have been a dream. A nightmare.

Will was the first at your side. Bodecker helped him lifted you back to your feet and get you to a chair. Arn and Cal watched in concern.

“You sure it was our pa?” Arn asked.

“I’ll save you the sight. I can assure you it’s him.” Bodecker said as he rubbed your shoulder and Will stood over you. “She should be fine. Get her some water. It’s the shock. You know the ladyfolk and their temperaments. They aren’t so equipped for things like this.”

“Any idea who? Why?” Arn prodded.

“Don’t think your pa had the sense to take his wallet but his belt buckle was gone and we can’t be sure what else they took,” Bodecker took your hand and caressed the back of it, “Honey, you drink tea? You want your brothers’ get you some?”

“I-- I--- You--You--” You stuttered.

“Come on, boys, let’s get her laying down,” Bodecker said as he stood. “She’s just havin’ a moment.”

Will and Cal lifted you out of the chair and carried you to the sofa in the front room. You were stiff as a board as they angled you onto the cushion and you could only babble at the ceiling.

“Go get that tea going, Will,” Bodecker ordered, “Cal, you go get her something to keep her warm.” Arn stood in the doorway and watched. “And Arn, get some wood for the fire. We should get it going.”

The boys dispersed as you laid across the couch. Bodecker touched your shoulder and you latched onto his wrist.

“You--” You hissed.

“Shhh, I only did what I had to. What you made me do,” he whispered, “‘cause you weren’t careful.”

You turned your head back and forth and squirmed. “No, no, no! You raped me! You killed my daddy!’

He covered your mouth and leaned over you. “Shut up! Shut up!” He sneered and his other hand went to your throat. “Now you got your clothes in a bag.” You nodded with wide eyes. “Good. I’m gonna take your brothers into town and you’re gonna burn them. Got it?” You nodded again. “And you’re gonna shut up.”

He released you roughly and stood as Cal came in with a blanket and tossed it over you. Bodecker helped straighten it and looked around.

“Think y’all should come back with me. We can get you sorted at the station then see about the caretaker.”

“All that already?” Arn asked.

“I ain’t rushing. Bodies don’t keep long, though. Investigations neither. We’ll get some statements from you boys and you’ll be free to choose what you wanna do from there.”

🚔

Will stayed home from school to keep watch over you. You didn’t know what was wrong with you. When your ma died, you didn’t feel this empty. You had cried for her, mourned for her. But now all you could do was sit there. Was it your fault? Even if Bodecker had pulled the trigger, you had brought your father there. You had been so concerned with keeping the sheriff from telling your secret, you had failed to hide it yourself.

Bodecker stopped by almost daily. He claimed it was to ask more questions or check on the family but you didn’t miss the way he looked at you. The way he made the excuse to be in the same room when he talked to your brothers. The way he shifted on his feet and peered around the house in silent triumph.

On the fifth day, you made Will go to school. He shouldn’t miss class because of you. He was the only one out of the boys who had ever read a book full through. So you saw them off, a proper breakfast for them for the first time since that horrifying morning, and you went about the list of undone chores.

You looked out the window at the shed. Your daddy never said much to you but you were used to his presence; the noise of his activity just outside. You couldn’t blame him for his faults, he’d fought a war, he’d worked hard, and he’d lost a wife. And now he was dead because of you.

You were scrubbing the floor when you heard the engine and the rubber treads on snow. You didn’t stop as you tried to scour away the salt stains and layer of dirt from the hallway. Boots clambered up the stairs and you kept your head down. 

No knock, no warning as Bodecker opened the door. You looked up at him as he kicked the snow off his feet.

“You’re up and about today,” he said in a pandering tone.

You said nothing and focused on your work. He took off his jacket and hung it on the rack in the corner. He wiped his boots on the mat and watched you. He hummed as he tapped his toe.

“I like that. You on all fours.” He taunted.

You sat back on your heels and dropped the rag in the bucket. “I got cleaning to do, Sheriff, and if you don’t recall, my daddy’s gone… for good.”

“Oh, I know it,” he said as you lifted the pail and he followed you to the kitchen. “But do you? Do you really know it?”

You dumped the water down the sink and plunked the empty bucket on the floor. “I know it and I know who done it. I saw you. How could you?”

“Your brother Arn’s gonna get the house in the will. He’ll be lookin’ for a wife soon. Means Cal’s gonna have to get his own place, take Will with him or get a wife of his own. And you? Where does that leave you?”

“There’s jobs for me out there, I can clean, I can cook,  I’m sure I could waitress,” you argued as you crossed to him. You grabbed his arms and tried to shove him. “Go. You don’t need to worry about me. I’d prefer it if you left me alone all together. You got what you wanted, Sheriff.”

“Not all of it,” he smirked. “You gonna drive yourself mad with all this.”

“What do you care?” You slapped his chest with both hands. “You don’t care about no one but you. You killed him!” You hit him again, “You killed him!”

He grabbed your upper arms and shook you. “You shut up about that now. You say anything again and you’ll be lyin’ beside him. If that ain’t enough, I’ll put your brothers there first.”

You reeled as if he’d slapped you. Your lip quivered and you sucked it in to keep from sobbing. “What do you want from me? I never wanted any of this.”

“You can’t know what you want, girl,” he wrenched you back and turned as he dragged you through to the living room. “So let me show you what you want. What your new daddy can do for you.”

“Get off of me!” You wrestled with him as he angled you around the couch. He shoved you and you fell back onto the cushions. “Leave me alone!”

He forced you back as you tried to stand and grabbed your chin. He squeezed as he looked down at you.

“Take them bloomers off now,” he ordered. “And hush your mouth.” You gaped up at him. He turned his hand and rested it against your cheek. “There’s one sure way to knock some sense into a woman,” he slapped you lightly, “You can decide if this lesson is an easy one or not.”

You sat back as you shrugged away his hand. You winced and lifted your pelvis and slipped off your underwear. As you did, your stockings bunched at your knees. Lee watched you with thick breath and purred. He knelt down and pushed your legs apart.

“Put your arms up. Just across the couch. Relax.” He directed as he got closer. “I wanna show you somethin’ makes the girls happy.”

“What are you--”

“You stop asking questions before I make it so you can’t. Now,” he squeezed your knees and his hands slipped up your thighs as he urged them further apart, “Just don’t think. Just sit there.”

He lifted your skirt over your head, one hand still on your legs. His warm breath tickled your pelvis and you squirmed. He pinched you and you exclaimed. You stilled and he slid his tongue down your cunt and poked between your folds. You choked on air as he dragged the tip of his tongue around your bud and your legs tense as your feet tried to arch in your flats.

He delved more firmly into your pussy and you grabbed onto the sofa. Your heart sped up and you pushed your pelvis out without thinking. You looked down at his head draped in your skirt as his mouth made sloppy noises. You felt a strange tingle as he kept on and your neck was pricked as you filled with guilt. It should feel good, whatever he was doing.

“Stop, please, Sheriff,” you begged.

He lapped hungrily as he ignored you and his hands gripped your hips. He pushed you into the couch as he devoured you and drew your pleasure to a point on his tongue. Your breath hitched and you moaned without thinking. You wanted him to stop but more, you wanted him to keep going.

And he did. He seemed to enjoy it just as much as your core pulsed. Your fingers dug into the cushion and your toes curled. You cried out, a voice that didn’t sound like yours, and rocked your pelvis against his face as you were overcome with delirium. You’d never felt so delicious.

Every ounce of strength drained from you. You panted as you slouched against the couch and he pulled away. Your skirt slipped from his head and his lips shone with your juices. He rubbed your legs and watched you writhe as your nerves were overwrought.

He stood with a grunt and unbuckled his belt. He licked his lips and tilted his head. “I knew you wanted me and now you know it too,” he said, “Now you show me that ass. You know I can’t resist.”

[daddynegandesires]

Secrets chapter 2

Summary: negans jealousy and temptation starts to escalate when he starts coming around trying to fit his way back into your life while also showing jack who the man of the house is but jack may also have secrets of his own no one knows about.

🛑Warning: fluff, major smut, saddness, jealousy, cheating,fighting 🛑

@jazzy1118

18+

Sitting on your bed with mascara tears streaming down your face holding onto old pictures of you,negan and ellie. Jack walks in and you quickly wipe your tears and shove the pictures under the pillow before he notices.

"Hey baby...whats wrong?" Jack slides in next to you

"Oh nothing haha" you sniffle and play it off all cool

"You looked beautiful lastnight...i realized i forgot to tell you" he said brushing a strand of hair behind your ear leaning in to kiss you softly. Jack resches inbetween your skirt automatically causing your legs to spread apart inviting him in. He reaches his other hand up your shirt grabbing your boob gently squeezing it in his hand you begin to quickly unbutton your blouse breathing heavier when the front door opens. You frantically pull your shirt back together terribly and tugging at your skirt when you exit the room to see negan and ellie standing in the living room.

" have you ever heard of calling or sending a text!!??" You cross your arms over your chest with a few buttons still loose allowing your black lace bra to peak out

"Well....looks like youve been busy" negan takes off his glasses sliding them ontop of his head

"I just thought id come by and cookout for ellie.." He grins pulling out steaks and ribs from a grocery bag.

"Oh! I brought wine too...your favorite"

"Cook out!?...wha" you followed behind him outside to the patio slamming the door behind you.

"So you think you can just walk into my house acting like you own the place saying you want to "cook out" for ellie!!??" By now you are almost inces away from him

Negan flicks on the grill and then grabs you gently by your face.

"I believe its my house too.....my name is also on the deed" he relases his hand and then walks past you back inside

You scoff to yourself as you stand there trying to process what is going on when jack comes outside.

"Im heading out for work...also whats up with him?"

"I..uh...he is cooking out for ellie i suppose" you said running your finger's through your messy hair

"I see.....well ill see you later, message me!" He gave you a quick peck on the cheek before hopping into his car and driving off. You sigh to yourself opening the door walking back into the kitchen seeing negan rubbing up the meat with spice's and ellie downing a bowl of chocolate ice cream.

"Negan! Seriously you gave her ice cream before dinner" you quickly took the spoon and bowl away from ellie before she could cram another spoonful in her mouth

"Whaaat let the kid live alittle...." He looks at ellie giving her a goofy face

You go over to dump out the ice cream in the trash can before dropping the dish in the sink next to negan you caught yourself looking at him his jacket was off and his sleeves were rolled up exposing his toned arms and rough hands. His black glasses resting on his face and his perfect salt and pepper hair. You always have had a thing for men a bit older than you and negan fit that image perfectly...jack was much younger than negan which you never would of guessed going for a younger man would be good for you.

"Mommy!!"

"Huh..yes honey?" Causing you to snap out of your thought's

"Can daddy stay the night we can stay up and was scawry moviessszz!!?" Ellies face lit up with excitment

"Oh. Sweetie im sorry but daddy cant stay the night" bending down to her level caressing her cheek

"Uuuuggghhhhh!! No fair!!" Ellie screams at the top of her lungs and starts flailing her arms

"Ellie! Do not act like that towards your mother!" Negans deep strong voice boomed in the kitchen almost making you weak at your knees. Ellie ran off to her room and slammed the door.

"That sassy girl" negan said looking at you through the top of his glasses

"Thank you...." You sighed exhaustedly while popping the cork off of the wine bottle and filling your cup up

"Mmmm...." Swallowing the sweet red wine feeling it flow down your throat

"So....you and younger guys huh?" Negan chuckled while washing his hands

"Something new...nothing wrong with that" you said taking another sip of your wine

"thought you had a fetish for older men....whats it called? Daddy issues"

"I guess you could say that...." Pouring more wine into your glass

"Sure sure..." Negans voice died out as he walked off to the bathroom

Negan came back into the kitchen grabbing the tray of meat outside and slapping it on the grill. You followed behind him wine glass in hand.

"So...was it you that told ellie to ask me if you could stay the night?" Raising an eyebrow

"Shouldnt you go get another glass of wine" negan chuckles

"Ya know...your cooking was always the best" chugging down the rest of your glass

" i think the wine is starting to talk haha" negan closed the lid to the grill folding his arms over his chest

---------

I was cleaning up the mess in the kitchen while ellie and negan were snuggled up on the couch watching friday the 13th together. Hearing negan be playful and caring with ellie really makes your heart happy. A part of you wishes things could have been diffrent between the two of you that is your babygirls father of course you love the both of them but being with negan just isnt in your future right now.

"Mommy come in here!"

You finished putting dishes away when you walked in there and sat down by negan he kept looking over at you grinning while ellie jumped at the scary scenes with jason Voorhees.

"So...hows the team going?"

"Good...good the boys are a handful" negan chuckled

"You were always a great coach you really pushed those boys to do great things" giving him A sweet smile

Talking about school with negan was always a touchy topic. He runs a basketball team at the local highschool......thats also where he was cheating on me with one of the english teachers.

"She is out like a light... My sweet girl." Negan was running his fingers through ellies long red hair when he looked over at you realizing you had fell asleep on his shoulder too. Negan picked up ellie and took her to her bed and tucked her in when he came back you were slightly awake.

"Thank you..." You said tiredly

"For what baby..." He said in a low deep voice

"For dinner and taking ellie to bed...its hard doing it alone sometimes..." You began to feel really vulnerable and kinda felt unsettling with negan calling you baby

"Jack should be home soon he gets off late.." You raised up off the couch

"You want me to leave...." Negan asked with puppy dog eyes

"Negan....you have to go im sorry"

"Baby....you know i never meant to hurt you" negan pulled you back down to sit on the couch

"But you did.....what were you thinking....you ruined everything" you were a bit tipsy from the wine and your emotions were just flowing out of you

"I love you negan! And you threw it all away for some fucking teacher at your school!!" You began shoving him

"All you care about is yourself you are so fucking full of yourself...you think you are so fucking amazing!" Now gripping onto his shirt hitting him in the chest he quickly pulled you into a tight hug and you began crying uncontrollably onto his shoulder soaking his tshirt.

"Shhh....im here now i promise you i will do anything..i want to be back in ellies life full time again i miss my girls" negan started to get all choked up holding back tears

"I...i cant right now negan its too soon im still hurting so bad.....im trying to move on from this" wiping the tears away from your eyes

"I understand.....im never going to let you down again all i want is for you and ellie to have a good life even if im not in it"

He stood up pulling you with him he took you to the bedroom and layed you down in bed taking your shoes off for you and tucking you in before jack got back.

"Goodnight" he kisses you on the forehead and leaves

---------

You woke up to ellie jumping and screaming on your bed you looked over to see jack sleeping next to you rubbing at his eyes.

"Good morning beautiful" he leans over and kisses you

"Goodmorning" you chuckled

"Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!" Ellie jumped onto you

"Hi sweetheart mommy sees you" you squeezed her tight in a hug before getting up out of bed

Jack had already gotten up and hopped into the shower when his phone began to ring on his bedside table you eagerly went over and looked at who it was. A girl named Melissa was calling him you just brushed it off and joined him in the shower.

"Hey...." Slipping off your panties and hopping into the shower with him

"Whoa...hey" jack said shocked

You grabbed him by the face and began kissing him hard feeling the hot water stream down your back. He moved his hand down between your legs taking one finger and slowly slipping it inside of you moaning out gripping onto his dick starting to slowly pump it back and forth feeling it grow long in your hand. Before you knew it he flipped you around ramming his cock into you pumping back and forth into your dripping wet pussy. His grip grew tighter on your hip as he started going faster and faster untill you felt an emptyness from him pulling out.

"Im hopping out im gonna let you finish up in here" he slapped your ass and then hopped out and closed the bathroom door behind him

"What a disappointment....." You whispered to yourself as you scrubbed shampoo through your hair knowing that negan would of never left you hanging like that and would of lasted way longer. Turning off the water you coulf faintly here jack laughing and talking to someone over the phone you quickly dried off and opened the bathroom door.

"Who are you speaking to?" You asked slipping on some clothes

"Ohh just a coworker nobody really" he said putting his phone into his pocket and sliding his tie on leaving the room

"Okay then....." You said to yourself

Slipping your shoes on you walked into the kitchen to make yourself a cup of coffee before jack headed off to work. Jack seemed super eager to leave for work today you just brushed it off assuming it was going to be a busy day for him at the office. He kissed you goodbye and took ellie with him to drop her off at daycare. It was just you alone in the house today which meant housework....gross.

You tied your hair up in a bun and began gathering your cleaning supplies you connected your phone to the bluetooth speaker blasting old rock songs. You were down on your hands and knees scrubbing at the floor in your short shorts when you were greeted by two feet infront of your face. You slowly looked up at who it was and it was negan with a huge dirty smirk on his face.

"This all for me doll?" He bit at his lip

"Oh....uh i planned on cleaning house today while everyone was out" you said shyly not realizing you were still on your knees

"I like you down there...on your knees" he slwoly chuckles

"Oh! Sorry....you cant just keep letting yourself in negan..." You quicly shot up to your feet

"You need me to help with anything?" He walks into the kitchen pouring himself a cup of coffee

"Ugh....The grass needs mowed......" You answered while wiping down the living room table

" jack doesnt mow grass?" Negan began laughing

"Negan...dont" standing there with your hands on your hips you sprayed him with the water bottle

"Hey!.....im just saying i figured young business boys couldnt mow grass anyway" negan walked outside and started up the pushmower.

An half and hour has passed and you finally finished the housework inside. You peaked out the window to see negan finishing up yard work...his shirt was off and he was all sweaty then jack suddenly pulls up causing you to stop gawking at negan.

"You always mow peoples grass" jack called out to negan getting out of the car

"Well, today i do. And maybe even next time...your girlfriend asked me to" negans jaw begins to flex

"Oh really...well" jack rubs at the back of his neck annoyed

"Dont think for a second that you have this all figured out......just setting some ground rules" Negan leans in towards jack and sternly says

Jack glared at negan as he walked past him to go insdie the house.

"Hi sweetie!" You greeted jack with a peck on his cheeck before stepping outside to speak with negan.

"I think you need to go...." You softly said to him trying not to stare at his sweaty toned bare chest

"Cmom doll.....things were getting fun. Jack is really starting to take a liking to me" he chuckles sliding his tongue across his bottom lip

"Negan....this isnt a game" you said picking up the gardening tools and taking them to the garage

"But i like games....and i always win" negan said in his cocky voice following behind you

You slammed down the shovel on the work bench in the garage before you knew it negan flipped you around lifted you up and and sat you ontop of the bench crashing his lips into yours he slid in between your legs grabbing a fist full of your hair yanking your head back as he began biting at your neck.

"Negan...." You moaned softly

"God i miss you moaing my name..."

"N....negan stop" it was so hard to resist him

"I want to have another kid with you....i want to fill myself insdie of you.....please baby" he tugged at your hair harder causing you to moan louder

The hairs on the back of your neck shot up after hearing what he had just said to you. You wrapped your legs tight around his waist and pulled him into you kissing him roughly biting and tugging at his bottom lip. You couldnt control yourself your body was weak negan always knew the right things to say. Negan took his two fingers pulling your yoga shorts aside to his surprise you weren't wearing any panties his finger began to play with your now swollen sensitive clit causing you to whimper out. He sucked on his finger making it wet before bringing it back to your clit gently flicking it faster and faster.

"Negan...im gon-

"(Y/n)...are you in here" jack called out from around the corner of the garage

"Oh shit!" You whispered to yourself before hopping off the work bench approaching jack

"Hey...im going to be going out of town on a business trip soon"

"Oh....well how soon?" You asked curiously

"Like...tonight soon" he quickly stated

"Oh...i see" your voice lowered

"I have to go baby i will keep in touch with you!" He kissed you before slow jogging to his car and leaving

A part of you didnt feel good about jack leaving for a "business trip" if thats really what it was.....something seemed off with him like he was hiding something. You stood from the garage watching him drive down the road untill you couldnt see his car anymore.

"Business trip huh....." Negan questioned walking up beside you

"Yeah...i suppose so" you said zoning out

Negan begins to chuckle and walk past you to his car.

"Wait were are you going!?" You yelled out to him

"Have to go pick up our daughter from daycare" negan calls out from the driver side

"Wait up im coming with you!" Jogging up to his black 1969 camero and hopping in the passenger seat

-------------

You,ellie and negan were back at the house when you were in the bedroom freshening up when you noticed jack had left his laptop on the dresser. Curiously you walked over and popped it open the screen automatically came on to his emails the very top email read from Melissa.

Hey jack we have that meeting tonight dont forget!😊 im also wearing that little tight dress you love.

You read the message over and over again the words ringing in your head making you feel sick to your stomach you slammed the laptop shut your body shaking full of rage and a adrenaline not knowing what to think or how to feel anymore. You just lay back on your bed zoning out up at the ceiling.

The door to the bedroom opens and its negan with a dirty smirk on his face looking at you layed out on the bed you just want to forget everything you want to feel numb you want to be made to feel dirty...

"Hey..." His deep tone giving you goosebumps

"Fuck me.....i want you to fuck me like the slut i am" you sternly said to him

Negan swiftly ripped his shirt off and yanked down your shorts spreading your legs apart bringing his tongue to your pussy licking your sweet folds brining his tongue down to your opening and all the way back up to your clit teasing you. You begin to grind up against his face while he pumps his cock hearing him moan only made you even more wet. He pulls his mouth away and flips you over slapping you on the ass hard the sting of it felt amazing he spanks you agains and a again before he enters his tip inside of you. Gripping onto the the bedsheets you have almost forgotten how big his cock is streching you open to fit perfectly insdie of you.

"Oh fuck.....god its so tight! You dirty fucking whore" he grunts slowly sliding more of his cock into you pulling your head back by your hair

"I miss you....i want you to fuck me hard..." You begin to rub your clit

Negan starts pumping his cock in and out of you his cock slowly swelling up inside of you and you squeeze down on him feeling all it all. He begins to move faster and faster leaning his face down to yours grabbing onto your throat squeezing it to let you feel that perfect high.

"Fuck...i...i cant keep going much longer" he starts fucking you faster and faster

"I want you to cum in me....please..i want your cum inside of me"! You beg

He lets out a load moan as he finishes inside of you and kisses you hard on the lips before pulling out letting his cum pour out of you all over the bedsheets. Negan pulls up his jeans as he hands you a towel to clean yourself up. You havent felt that amazing in awhile so relaxed and burnt off some built up rage

"All you have to do is ask and im here...." He whispers to you before leaving the room to go check on ellie. You get up from the bed to go take a shower.

"What am i doing......." You say to yourself

"Im so fucking stupid...." You begin to cry and sit with your knees pulled up to your chest in the tub feeling like a peice of shit after what you had just done. You are playing with negans emotions and stabbing jack in the back...what kind of girlfriend and mother am i.

[qianinterprises]

WayV Reaction: finding out their S/O has Borderline Personality Disorder

Pairing(s): WayV x Reader Genre: angst, fluff Warnings: mention of mental health, depression, anxiety, symptom's included in BPD. Trigger Warnings: depression, anxiety, hostility, mention's of self-harm, self-doubt, low self-image Word Count: 3.9k

Author's Notes: I'll be honest and say that I had to research Borderline Personality Disorder. I knew what it was/had heard of it before, but in order to write something accurate, I tried to educate myself. If you believe that you have BPD, please don't be afraid to go to a doctor or a trusted friend/family member. Your mental health is important.

Author's Note 2.0: I also want to mention that (as per earlier request), I am also working on a YangYang fic that features a reader with Borderline Personality Disorder. I'm not entirely sure when it will be posted (soon hopefully), but it is in my WIP's.

Author's Note 2.0: Kun's is a little different, I apologize for the difference and the shortness. Tagging:@treasuretaeil

Kun:

Kun was in the middle of dance practice when his phone began to ring. At first, he let it go to voicemail, but by the third ring, Ten paused the music and Kun grabbed his phone out of his coat pocket, expecting to see your name popping up on the screen. You were at home today after a particularly rough week at work that had left you feeling spent. Kun longed to be home with you, holding you tight in his embrace. As his eyes met your next door neighbor's name on his phone screen, his stomach dropped. Mrs. Huang only called when it was really serious. "Hello?" he asked into the receiver. "Oh thank goodness!" she cried, voice laced with anxiety enducing agitation. "What's wrong?" "It's (y/n)! They've brought me five big tins of muffins! I can't possibly eat all of these! And they've gone to the store twice with ingredients! I think something's wrong! Kun sighed. This morning, you had been so happy. You were practically singing to the birds. He knew it wouldn't last though, especially with the week you'd had. "I'll be there soon!" Kun left practice without another word and when he got home, he found you in the kitchen, covered in flour, vigorously mixing a creamy liquid in one of your metal mixing bowls. The kitchen was covered in ingredients; flour puffed on the counters and floor, broken egg shells on the table, a half empty measuring cup of milk teetering on top of the fridge. It was bad this time. Kun knew you had borderline personality disorder. It had been something you'd told him in the beginnings of your relationship. He had seen you at your worst, and at your best, but it still broke his heart every time he witnessed you at a breaking point. "(y/n)?" You paused in your vigorous mixing, eyes glancing up to meet his. He didn't say anything, eyes locked on yours, but his eyes held no pity. Instead, they held pure, unfiltered love that had you putting the whisk aside. "Do you love me?" you whispered. A small wisp of a smile reflected across his face as he crossed the room, arms wrapping around your body. "More than anything," he whispered.

Ten:

You and Ten had only been together for a short amount of time; three months to be exact. It was an exhilarating three months. Time you wouldn't give for anything in the world, even though you didn't get to see each other often with Ten's very busy schedule. However, after the "Kick Back" album released, WayV was allowed to take a break as SM turned their attention to the scheduled release of NCT Dream's first album. Normally, Ten would then be whisked away for some SuperM promotion, but with Baekhyun's enlistment, SuperM was also allowed to take a break as the company decided what to do. Which ultimately meant you got to spend more time with your boyfriend, which, most would deem as a good thing and, you were happy he was there, however, it became a lot harder to hide your little secret from him. Your best friend, Kun, had introduced you to Ten (and the rest of the members), when Kun officially became a member of NCT. Kun and Ten had immediately hit it off as friends, which meant you also spent a lot of time with Ten, thus leading to a blossoming friendship and later attraction. So Ten lying in your bed snoring softly wasn't that far of a stretch from a common day encounter. The difference was, today, you didn't feel like yourself. Being in a friendship with Ten meant that, yes, you saw him often, but not often enough that you couldn't keep parts of yourself private. Which is exactly what you did, especially as your tiny crush on Ten grew into something mutual, eventually leading to a relationship. The truth you were so afraid of revealing was your disorder. Borderline Personality Disorder. A disorder you'd been diagnosed with since you were a your teenager. You'd been teased and bullied for it when a classmate you'd once called a friend announced your disorder to the entire school. This, in turn, had terrified you of ever telling anyone, which you had gotten away with. Ten didn't know and, if you had it your way, he'd never know. He was an idol. What did he need with a girlfriend with this disorder. However, with him hanging around a lot... "Hey? What's wrong?" Ten's voice snapped you from your thoughts. You'd been so distracted you hadn't realized his soft snoring had ceased. "Nothing," you said softly. His lips pursed, perplexed as he softly reached a hand up to brush across your cheek, something he'd done several times. But today, you didn't want it. You shied away from his hand, curling yourself up on the opposite side of the bed, cursing yourself for acting different than usual, but you couldn't help it. Ten didn't bat an eye. He simply gave you a soft smile and sat up in the large bed, but he didn't try to touch you again. "Feeling sad today?" he asked. You nodded meekly. "Would you like to talk about it?" he asked. You paused for a moment to think it over. You truly didn't. You wished you could keep it a secret forever, because Ten might leave you. But you also knew that the stress was taking it's toll on you. "I have Borderline Personality Disorder..." you whispered. He didn't say anything at first and you were preparing yourself for him to call you a freak and leave. Instead, he stretched his arm out and softly wrapped his pinky around yours. "I don't know much about it. But I promise I will learn," he whispered. Tears brimmed your eyes because finally, someone wasn't going to leave you.

WinWin:

You had never been much of a touchy person. Holding hands was one thing, and even then, something you weren't wholly comfortable with, but hugging was completely different. You didn't care much for hugs, especially from complete strangers that often found you rude for rejecting their hug. You barely even hugged your own family, let alone a total stranger. This was possibly what spurred on your relationship with Sicheng who, also didn't care much for physical affection, despite the fact the other members of NCT practically drowned him in it. Your relationship was just... different. At least in the minds of society because you didn't cuddle against Sicheng's chest constantly or plop down on his lap just because he was sitting down. Instead, you preferred wrapping your pinky around his or draping one of his sweaters over your shoulders. This worked for the two of you though others found it strange. However, there was an anomaly that Sicheng, though you had been together for a little over two years, had no idea about. This anomaly included the fact that sometimes, you liked hugs. Sometimes, all you wanted to do was drape yourself over your boyfriends lap and let him hold you until your mind screamed at you for the overload of affection. Sometimes you wanted him to wrap his arms around you in bed and fall asleep with you on his chest. That's what happens when you have Borderline Personality Disorder, and it wouldn't have been that big of a deal if Sicheng had known, but he didn't. It started out you longing to keep it a secret in the early days of your relationship. It wasn't something you advertised very often. However, as your relationship progressed, you knew you should have told him, but as five months turned into six, it became a crushing weight of guilt for not telling him in the beginning. Sicheng had already invested a lot of time and love in the relationship when you had not been wholly honest with him. And the more time that passed, the harder it was for you to get the words out. At this point, it wasn't even your fear of rejection because of the disorder, it was a nagging fear that your dishonesty about the disorder would drive him away from you. That would truly be a crushing point. However, as Sicheng began spending more nights at your apartment, it was getting increasingly harder to hide, especially as your mood dropped or when you suddenly began to crave affection. Times like today. The moment you'd rolled out of bed, you knew you needed some type of affection, but as Sicheng made no advance to give it to you throughout the day, your mood dropped. It really wasn't his fault. He had no idea how you were feeling, but as you finally had had enough and wrapped your arms around him from behind while he was washing the dishes after dinner, you felt him stiffen before grabbing a towel to dry his hands. "What's up with you today?" The question was an honest one, but it still felt as though you were making him uncomfortable by touching him. As your arms slacked from around him, a tear sprang to your eye but you were quick to wipe it away as he turned to face you. "I need to tell you something..." Your voice was wavering. You had no idea how he would respond. He nodded for you to continue, one of his hands gently taking hold of yours, playing with your fingers as a soft sense of relief washed through you. "I have Borderline Personality Disorder." His once blank face morphed into one of confusion. "What's that?" he asked tentatively. You sighed. You had been expecting the question but that didn't make it any easier to define. "Its like having mood swings. One day I feel happy the other sad... Sometimes anti-hugs, sometimes super affectionate." You could tell he was still confused, but as he nodded and wrapped his arms around your body, drawing you against his tall frame, you let out a shuddered breath, body relaxing against him.

Lucas:

Books were never Yukhei's strong suit. He preferred numbers and basic information plotted out clearly in front of him. Books were too all over the place with too much information. He wished they could be like websites that gave him the briefest of explanations with a "read more" feature. Yet here he was, flipping through slightly crinkled pages because he wanted to truly understand, and books were always credited with having the most information. "I have Borderline Personality Disorder," you had explained earlier that day when you had ducked out of the way of one of his mega bear hugs and proceeded to slump your shoulders and beg him to give you time alone. You'd locked yourself in your shared bedroom after that and, although you had texted him to apologize for your behavior, you added that today was just an off day, your disorder really affecting your mood. "Well how can I help?" he had asked. It was your response that prompted him here, pouring over books in the local library hoping to find anything that would help him understand Borderline Personality Disorder in the best way possible. As he flipped through pages and learned, he had begun to feel several different emotions. On one end, he felt sorry that you'd had to go through the disorder alone, but on the other, he questioned why you'd never told him, even after a year of being together. However, a big part of him wondered if maybe you had been telling him, just without words, especially because you'd never tried to hide any of your mood swings. He'd just always assumed you were on your period. As the hours ticked away, Yukhei's eyes remained glued to the startlingly dry books stacked up around him, but as he learned more about the disorder and, by default, more about you, he couldn't seem to stop. At least not until his phone vibrated in his pocket and, as he fished it out, your smiling face met his eyes. He answered the facetime request and gave you a tired smile that quickly morphed into concern when he noticed your bloodshot eyes. "Baby? What's wrong? Did something happen?" "My boyfriend left me! That's what happened!" Were you... pouting? "I didn't leave baby, I'm at the library." Confusion flashed across your face. "Why?" "To learn more about Borderline Personality Disorder." A giggle erupted from your lips and Yukhei sure was glad to hear it, especially after reading texts about BPD leading to depression. "Why didn't you just google it?" His mouth gaped open as he dramatically clutched his chest. "Googling something so important in my significant other's life?! That's scandalous! I should do enough research to write my own 20-page essay!" This time, it was a full blown laugh. "You're a dork!" "I'm your dork!" "Well come home, dork! There's a lot we have to discuss!" Your smiling face alleviated any fears that may have been swirling around Yukhei's chest. With a nod, he slammed a book shut so hard it send a loud, slamming bang throughout the library, prompting nasty looks sent his way. Sheepishly, he waved them off and stood up. "I'll be home soon," he promised, blowing you a kiss before hanging up. Yukhei had taken the hastily thrown news a lot better than you'd expected. You knew he couldn't have learned everything, specifically because it varied person to person, but you knew that he would be there for you, even on your bad days. And that was all you could ask for.

Xiaojun:

Dejun was incredibly perceptive, even if he was incredibly dumb sometimes. He could tell when you weren't quite feeling yourself, even though he often didn't know what was causing it. It was at those times that he did everything he could to put a smile back on your face and make you feel "normal" again. He didn't understand how counter productive that actually was. It was really your fault. You were the one keeping secrets, but as the smile fell from your face the second Dejun traded the couch for the shower, you couldn't help but think that maybe he simply preferred you to be happy rather than deal with you when you weren't. Somewhere in the back of your head, you knew he was just doing what he thought would help, but now, especially in your state of mind, you couldn't shake the aching feeling in your head. "Hey, are there towels- are you crying?" Dejun's voice yanked you out of your thoughts and you brought your hands to your cheeks, rapidly trying to wipe away the clear droplets painting your face, but it was too late. Dejun had already seen. He was shirtless when he perched on the couch beside you, face etched in concern. He opened his mouth, likely to retort off some lame dad joke or tell you some funny story you'd heard a thousand times. "Can you not?" You hadn't meant to snap. The words had simply flown out before you'd had the chance to them. His face fell into a pout that you knew you often fell for, but today, it only upset you more. "Stop Dejun!" The pout fell away. "Stop what? I'm not doing anything!" "You're trying to make me smile!" He blinked, staring at you for a moment. "That's a bad thing?!" You sighed, slumping against the couch cushions, resigning yourself to the fact that he didn't understand. Then again, you didn't let him understand. "Just tell me why I'm upsetting you," he begged, all traces of bad humor gone, replaced with sincerity. "I have Borderline Personality Disorder! My mood fluctuates! And when you try to make me smile when I'm sad or mad makes me feel like you don't like me when I'm not always happy. But I can't always be happy." He stared at you in shock for a moment, mouth opening and closing as if he didn't know how to respond. An appropriate response, you supposed. You'd been friends for a while now and dating for several months, yet this was the first time you'd told him. You were about to get up from the couch, sighing as he didn't respond after several minutes, when he placed a hand on your thigh to stop you. "Why didn't you tell me?" You shrugged. It wasn't that simple. "Can you tell me the best ways to comfort you?" Again, you shrugged. A sigh released from his mouth and your head hung low. "I'm going to do some research. As your boyfriend, I want to make sure I'm making you feel better, not worse. So, while I'm doing that, I also need you to tell me if something I'm doing is making you feel worse. Can you do that for me?" His words were sincere, his intentions true. Another tear fell from your eye, dropping against your cheek, but a smile broke out across your face. "Thank you for caring," you whispered. He pulled you onto his lap and pressed a soft kiss to the nape of your neck. "Always."

Hendery:

Waking up this morning had been such a struggle, even as the delightful scent of your boyfriends cooking wafted under the cracks of the door, greeting you. Usually, this would rouse you from your slumber, prompting you to creep into the kitchen and sneak a taste of the delightful breakfast. Today, however, you rolled over in the blankets and pulled the duvet over your head. Today was a lay in bed day, you just hoped your boyfriend would accept that. "Come on sleepy head! It's time to wake up!" Kunhang's annoyingly chipper voice spouted, pulling you from the confines of sleep in a less pleasant way. "No," you groaned, rolling over, burying your face deeper into the pillow. "Come on! Breakfast is ready!" He pulled the blankets off your body and you let out a loud hiss, eyes turning to bore into him. "I said no!" He dropped the blanket and backed off, lifting his hands in surrender, but you could tell he had questions. You never acted like this. "What's wrong?" You grunted, not responding, turning away from him, but he wasn't having it. "Yah! I asked you a question!" he pouted at being ignored. A growl whipped it's way from your throat. "Go look up BPD," you snapped. You could tell that he had more questions, but, after a long moment, he seemed to think better of asking them and, instead, made his way out of the room, leaving you to fall back asleep. It had to have been a few hours later when you were waking up on your own this time, the anger you had felt earlier completely gone now, replaced with your normal, chipper self. You turned over to look at Kunhang's side, releasing he wasn't there and the memories came flooding back to you along with a strong wave of guilt. You shouldn't have treated Kunhang the way you did. There was nothing out of the ordinary with the way he'd reacted to your sleeping for. With a sigh, you threw your legs over the side of the bed and stood up, padding over the floors to the door. You made your way out of the bedroom and down the hall, finding Kunhang sitting on the couch, television with the volume turned down, playing some movie he didn't look too interested in. As the floor creaked slightly under your feet, his attention shifted from the television to you and he was quick to shut off the device. "How are you feeling?" he asked. Your heart dropped into your stomach. Had you really affected him? "I'm sorry for how I reacted..." you mumbled. A sigh rolled past his lips as he patted the couch next to him. You made your way to him, flopping beside him, but keeping your distance, at least until he pulled you against his side. "I understand why you did after looking up Borderinel Personality Disorder," he said. "But you couldn't have expected me to know without knowing." With a nod, you hung your head. "Why didn't you tell me?" "I thought you wouldn't like me if you knew I had a disorder..." you mumbled. Saying it out loud, it felt ridiculous. You knew he loved you. The fact that he waited for you to wake up even after how you'd treated him proved that. But it had been a fear nevertheless. "Now that I know, I can help you rather than making things worse. But in the future, please let me know. I hated watching you so upset without knowing how to help." You leaned against him, burying your face in his chest as you nodded.

YangYang:

(full fic coming soon) YangYang's youth was what truly scared you the most. He still had so much to learn. He was so naive, about some things at least. He could make you feel so good, so loved, when he'd hold you in his arms and kiss your head or when he threw himself across your lap and begged to be pet. You were scared that the second he knew the truth about you, he'd leave, or worse, treat you differently. Your older brother, Kun, had advised you to just be honest with him. To let him know when you had bad days. Yet, here you were, hiding out in your brothers bed, hoping practice would run late so YangYang wouldn't see your crestfallen face. It seemed luck wasn't on your side that day, not entirely anyway, because the door to the room opened and Kun walked in half shirtless, belt unbuckled. "Please don't strip anymore," you'd begged. The boy nearly jumped out of his skin at your words. "(y/n)?! What are you doing here?!" "I missed Yang..." "So why didn't you come to practice? You know you're welcome." Your silence was his answer and he sighed, sliding on another, not sweat-soaked shirt, and sat on the bed beside you, reaching out to gently stroke your arm. "You really should tell him," he whispered. "But what if he rejects me?" "He won't. Sis, I know him. He's not like some dirtbags you've dated in the past. And he might just be able to help you better than I can," he whispered. You knew he was right. He was always right (as annoying as it was). "Will you send him here? I don't want to get out of bed..." "Of course," he said, patting your arm one more time before getting out of bed and making his way out of the room. It was a few minutes later when a sweaty YangYang walked in, searching for your figure before sitting down beside you on Kun's bed. "You wanted to see me?" he asked. "I have Borderline Personality Disorder..." The words just rushed out before you could stop them, but you were thankful. This saved you from yourself. For a long moment, YangYang didn't say anything and you were beginning to think Kun had been wrong for once. "So that's why Kun had me do all that research..." Ok, that definitely wasn't what you were expecting. "Not long after we started dating, Kun made me do all this research on BPD. He even quizzed me once a week! I just assumed it was punishment for dating his sister!" A loud laugh fell past your lips. That was absolutely something Kun would do!

"Are you mad I didn't tell you?" you asked.

"Well, why didn't you?"

"I was afraid you'd leave me like my exes..."

"Then yes, I'm mad!" he said.

Your face dropped.

"I'm sorry..."

"I'll just have to teach you a lesson!"

With that, he threw himself on top of you, pressing his sweaty clothes against you as you shrieked, attempting to get away.

"Guys... not on my bed..."