15 | ONE THING RIGHT
Fandom: Mayans M.C.
Pairing: Miguel Galindo x Female OC Adelaide Lancaster.
Summary: After her crush rejected her for so many years, Adelaide found the love of her life, but not everything is perfect. Not when she fell in love with the devil.
Words: 2,602.
A/N: So... HI. It's been sooooo long and I'm so sorry. I'm not gonna come up with excuses, just so you know, I'm sorry lol. Uh... I don't know if someone is reading this, but if you are... thank you so much. I was sad for the news that the next Mayans season is the last one we'll get and I finished this chapter. I don't know what I'm gonna do once the show is over, but I guess will be our time to keep on writing about them idk lol... As always: English is not my first language, so, sorry if there are grammar mistakes or if the redaction is poor. *gifs not mine*
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| Now |
“Your husband called.”
It was eight in the morning and Adelaide woke up when a nurse walked into her room. The first she told her was that she’ll have an intravenous antibiotic, but she didn’t pay too much attention. Truth was that she barely listened since the doctor told her that they didn’t find her baby’s heartbeat.
Dita got into her room during the night to leave her purse and ask her to let Miguel inside. She just thanked her for taking her stuff and for being there. She completely ignores what she had told her about Miguel. She didn’t care how worried he could be; she didn’t want to see him.
“He said he’s coming to replace his mother and wanted us to ask you if you could let him in.” The nurse says once she pulls out the syringe. Adelaide doesn’t turn to her.
“I don’t want to see anyone.” She repeats and the nurse just nods and walks out of the room.
Adelaide lays on her right side, her back to the door and her gaze to the window. She knows that she has to face Miguel at some point, but she still doesn’t want to do it. She would like to think that he didn’t mean what he told her the night before, but his words keep repeating in her head, and she is not sure she could stop them.
When she started to work after she got married, she had the purpose to leave her work in her office and be completely present at home. Her only job when she was with her son, was protecting him. Make sure he was fine and… she couldn’t do it. With neither. Both of them are gone.
“I said I don’t want to see anybody.” She says when she hears the door being open. She’s not sure how much time has passed by now, but she’s sure it’s not a nurse or a doctor, they would have knocked on the door before. So, she keeps her gaze on the IV that’s on the back of her hand and wipes the tears off of her face.
“And you know how much I fucking don’t care?”
When she hears that voice, Adelaide turns around to see her best friend a couple of feet away from her bed.
“Who called you?” She asks, sitting up as fast as she can ‘cause her back still hurts from the epidural she got. Ez translates that as the chance to get closer to her.
“Emily.” EZ says, shrugging “She said you didn’t want to see anyone, that maybe you’d talk to me.”
Adelaide's eyes start to fill with tears and Ez sits at her side to hug her, letting her cry on his shoulder as much as she wants.
She doesn’t understand why but there is something in Ez that, somehow, calms her down. She had to be mad at him, she had to tell him to go away and not get close to her again, but now that she has him near, his closeness comforts her.
“Emily also said that Miguel deleted our numbers…” She hears Ez say once she controls her tears. She texted Emily Ez’s number once Dita brought her things during the night, and she also told her what had happened. She never thought her friend would dare to talk to Ez that soon “How did you get them back?”
“I called Riz’s sister and she gave me his number, then he gave me yours,” Adelaide explains, but she realizes that Ez doesn’t pay that much attention to her. He looks like he has so many things in his head “What?”
“I don’t like what he did… it’s not right.” Ez says after sighing.
“He knew I saw Angel yesterday…” Adelaide looks at his friend and when she sees the confusion on his face, she realizes he doesn’t know the context of the situation “He always loses his mind when your brother is involved.”
“Why?” Ez asks even more confused.
“Because he hates him.” She simply says.
“Why?”
“You’re not gonna let it go, right?”
“Nope.”
Adelaide sighs and even though she’s not in the mood to tell him about her past with Angel, she does it.
“Before I knew Miguel, I confessed my feelings to your brother. At first, he said that he didn’t feel anything back, but then he did. We started dating, I guess… at least everybody thought that we were but we never talked about it, we never felt we needed to.” She half smiles. “We were like that for eight months or so, and it was everything I imagined since I was a teenager…”
“Ugh…” Ez looks disgusted and all Adelaide can do is hit his ribs with her arm.
“Shut up, you wanted to know.” They laugh for a few seconds, and once their laughs calm down, she continues “Then, one day out of the blue, Angel came and said that what we were doing wasn’t right. That you saw me like a sister and your father as a daughter. He said that the only relationship he wanted to have with me, was the brother-sister one, and he left before I could tell him I was pregnant.”
Adelaide feels his gaze on her, but for some reason, she can’t look at him.
“I was so mad, Ez… I’ve never felt like that before, and… what was I gonna do? He didn’t want anything with me and I didn’t feel ready to have a baby without a father, so, I went to Los Angeles to get an abortion.” She pauses, ‘cause the memories of last night come back to her. She waits until the lump in her throat vanishes and thanks Ez that he doesn’t push her to continue before she’s ready “Two weeks later, Angel came to me to ask me for a pregnancy test my mother found… I had other options; I could have lied to him, but I noticed he was happy and I felt the necessity to wipe that smile off of his face, I wanted him to feel the same that I felt so I told him, and I know it’s your brother but…”
“He’s an asshole most of the time, I know…” Ez says. Adelaide nods and even though she feels she doesn’t deserve it; she thanks the Lord because his best friend’s not judging her decisions.
“I got what I wanted. Angel was so mad, he even told me that he hated me for what I did. We stopped talking to each other until I went to the clubhouse for Coco’s birthday… I just went to give him a cake I baked but Angel asked me to stay, that he didn’t have any problem with that because I was Coco’s friend too, so I did… Angel got so drunk and he apologized for what he said. He told me he missed me, that he wanted us to go back to the friendship we had before all of that, and I missed him too so I pushed my feelings for him aside and I accepted.” She looks at the rings on her finger and she smiles ‘cause the words she’s about to say are forming a memory in her mind. She still can see it all perfectly and the butterflies are still there “A couple of months later I met Miguel…” she says “Angel didn’t like it at all when I started dating him. Even the club tried to convince me to leave him, but I loved him. It just… happened too fast. Then, two months before Miguel proposed to me, I had a pregnancy scare… I was at Lore’s house and I was crying when Riz stopped by. I tried to pretend to be okay but he knew something was wrong and he told Angel… When he asked me, I told him the truth and you know what he said?”
“Bullshit, I guess…”
Adelaide nods.
“His exact words were ‘Well... if you are, you already know how to get rid of the problem’.”
“What the fuck, Angel?” Ez mutters, shaking his head.
“That’s what I said.” Adelaide shrugs “I talked to him again the day after Miguel proposed…”
Ez doesn’t say anything for a moment. She sees him trying to digest everything she said. She also doesn’t add anything. She feels she talked way too much. Probably was way too honest.
“Miguel knows all of this.” Ez doesn’t ask. These few days, she’s been in charge of letting him know that Miguel is the one that she leans in, so he wouldn’t be surprised if she had told him everything.
“I had to tell him because your brother threw a scene at my parent’s house when I was pregnant with Cristobal. He held me in his arms the whole night while I cried.” That’s the moment when she can’t keep on with her words. It doesn’t matter how much she tries to put the events of the night aside; she can’t make them go away “I was thinking about all of that the whole night… that was the first thing I thought when the doctor told me that… that my baby was gone…”
Her hands land on her eyes trying to stop the tears from going out. But the blame she’s feeling for the decisions she made in the past is even stronger than when she made them.
“They told you why it happened?” Ez asks once she sighs and uncovers her face.
“No… they said that sometimes happens. It can be for long periods of stress, ‘cause the baby wasn’t completely fine… but I think it was karma.”
Ez shakes his head, disagreeing with her “You said Miguel loses his mind when Angel is involved… you can trust me, Addie. You can tell me what really happened…”
Adelaide takes her gaze up to him once she understands what he said between the lines. His words take her by surprise but she’s aware that more than one person in her social circle could and would think the same way.
“You think he did this? No… I mean, we argued but he didn’t touch me. He would nev—”
“I have seen him doing things that—”
“That I haven’t, I get it…” Adelaide says, a little bit mad ‘cause out of all the people in her life, she thought Ez would be the one that could never doubt her common sense “I know what he does, Ez, I know who he is. I don’t need anyone telling me about it.” Ez tries to speak, but Adelaide doesn’t give him the chance “I’m not that helpless little girl you met, anymore… you need to understand that.”
“I do… I just… I don’t trust him.” He looks at her and, again, she’s not surprised by his words. It’s not the first time she hears them “The fact that he deleted our numbers because he was jealous…”
“Who said he was jealous?” She lets out a laugh and Ez throws her a glance “Miguel is not jealous of Angel…”
“No… he’s jealous about the life you used to have.” Ez tells her but she can’t imagine Miguel feeling that way “He’s insecure about you wanting to go back to that, after everything you left behind—”
“Why would I?” She interrupts him “I love him, and I know I said shit last night but I’m happy with him…”
Ez doesn’t insist anymore and she’s glad. She’s been listening to a lot of people saying that what she feels for Miguel isn’t love since the moment she started dating him. Even now that they’re married. She was tired of that.
“You said you saw Angel… what did you talk about?” He asks.
“You really don’t know?” She lifts an eyebrow and can see his regret for asking that crossing his face in less than a second.
“You know it…” Ez says and sighs “Listen, I didn’t know that she was trying to take Cristobal, if I knew, I would have warned you, I wouldn’t have—”
“Ez, I don’t care anymore.” Adelaide interrupts him, shaking her head no and making Ez turn to her “Cristobal’s fine and he has to come back tomorrow.”
“Adelita said something that I didn’t understand…” Ez says after a couple of seconds. Adelaide doesn’t say anything back ‘cause she knows Ez hasn’t finished talking “She said that she didn’t understand how could you marry one of the responsible for your father’s death.” At this point, Adelaide freezes. She doesn’t speak not because she doesn’t have anything to say, but ‘cause she doesn’t know how Adelita knows that “I thought your father died in a car crash…”
“I thought that too.” She finally says.
| Then |
| ONE YEAR EARLIER |
“Your abuela made it…”
She wasn’t her grandmother, but Alonso’s mom loved her as her granddaughter and she almost threw a big party when Adelaide and Miguel told her they were expecting their first child.
Adelaide was almost six months pregnant. She could no longer hide her bump and that only made her and Miguel even more excited about starting their own family. The nursery was almost done; Adelaide and Bridget designed it and Miguel was also being part of the process it didn’t matter how tired he whenever he got home. Sure he had more money than what they needed to hire someone so his wife wouldn’t have to work, but he was enjoying so much being part of creating the place where his child would spend the first years of his life in.
“It’s beautiful, thank you.” Adelaide smiled as she looked at the white knitted sweater that Alonso gave her. She was so thrilled to know her son would be loved by many people and she couldn’t wait any longer to have him in her arms, but she couldn’t say anything else ‘case her parents’ doorbell ranged. “I’ll go…” Adelaide said and still with the sweater in hand, she went out of the kitchen towards the front door. There, she found someone unexpected “Angel…” Adelaide said surprised and the smile that was forming on her face, disappeared immediately when she noticed Angel’s gaze was on her bump.
“You were the one I wanted to talk to…”
With those words, she confirmed that he was drunk. She took a glance at the jeep outside and saw Gabriel about to walk towards them, but she shook her head to let him know everything was fine.
“What happens?” She asked looking down at his hand, he still had a bottle of beer.
Angel looked at the bump on her belly again and didn’t say anything, as if he couldn’t do something else than look at that spot on her body.
“I was about to tell you, it’s just that Miguel and I decided to keep it between us for a couple of months…” she started to say. The moment she told Miguel she was pregnant, he said the news had to stay in their inner circle, just family and very close friends like Bridget and Emily knew. But Angel didn’t seem to be listening to her words. He just shook his head and looked up at her face slowly.
“You’re a piece of shit…” He said. Hatred irradiated out of his eyes as she gave a little step back not understanding what he was talking about.
“Angel…” She whispered looking back to see if anyone listened to his words but there was nobody near “What are you saying?”
“You…” he repeated slower “Are. A fucking. Piece of shit.” Angel gave a step towards her, and leaned to be closer to her face “That’s what you are…”
“You should go, you’re drunk.” Adelaide asked giving another step back to close the door, but he didn’t let her by placing a hand on it “Angel…”
“Why?” he asked raising the tone of his voice “Who’s in here? Here’s your husband? I didn’t see his lap dog outside…”
“Angel…”
“No, it’s fine.” He said lengthening his last word and stepping into the house “Let’s tell him what kind of woman he married…”
“It’s everything all right?” Amanda asked coming out of the living room.
“Yes, mom,” Adelaide said nodding and about to ask her to go back to the kitchen. She didn’t want anyone to hear ‘cause at that moment she knew exactly what Angel was talking about.
“You never told her, right?” Angel said laughing under his breath “You didn’t have the guts to…”
“What’s happening?” Adelaide’s mom asked again but she only shook her head.
“He’s drunk; he doesn’t know what he’s saying…”
“The fuck I know!” He shouted, “You… you’re walking around, really happy, showing your bump, so proud for Galindo’s baby, but… what did you do to the other one?”
“Angel, please…”
“You… you killed it!” Angel shouted again.
Amanda looked at her daughter, but Adelaide only could look at Angel. Now, both of them had tears in their eyes. She pressed her lips together and tried to hold back the tears.
“You didn’t tell me shit!” Angel continued getting angrier “I would have been there for you and him, or her… I wouldn’t have run!”
“Angel…”
“Angel! Angel!” He said laughing “Is that everything you know how to say?” Angel looked at her, both of them forgetting about the fact that Amanda was there and now, Alonso too “You let some doctors kill my baby… our baby.” He pointed to her and then to himself, and that was the moment when neither of them could hold their tears “And that’s something I’ll never forgive you for.”
“You should go, mister.” Gabriel tried to grab Angel’s arm but the Mayan moved.
“I hope you remember what you did every time you see that kid’s face.”
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Taglist: @glimmerglittergirl @calif0rnia-lovers @scapricciatello @keithseabrook27 @rosey1981 @piccasoe @ntlmundy @dirtynerdy98 @mheart27 @enamouravecleslivresetlechocolat @luckyharley1903 @thejulietfarciertlove
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WIP Weekends!!!!
Hey everyone! I'm back after a very long hiatus, but in my defense I have been consumed by writing this story. That being said, I felt my motivation waning and thought it might help to get some feedback.
This is from a modern Inu/Kag AU that I have been working on. It is the story of a miserable puppy who screwed up pretty bad when he found out that his band's new manager was his fated mate. Resenting destiny and it's cruel sense of timing, Inuyasha tries his hardest to push Kagome away in every way possible. He takes advantage of her kindness and realizes too late that he is head over heels in love with her before he chased her away.
Now, six years later he is doing everything possible to win her back. Kagome comes to his home in Vegas, hoping to reconnect with her old friend Sango but shocked to find the whole band waiting for her. Inuyasha is ready to start a new album and needs her help, but she is less than eager to jump back into a partnership with them. After a very tense and public argument, Kagome leaves with Sango and promise to make a decision after listening to the music.
Inuyasha feels slighted and decides that the best way to get her undivided attention is to follow Kagome home to LA... on the same flight. Not creepy at right?
This picks up after the plane lands. Kagome has fallen asleep on Inuyasha's arm after they talked out a few things on the trip. In her half-conscious state, she doesn't realize when or where she is and makes a few off hand comments that, while true, still hurt Inuyasha's feelings.
Sooooo... whew! That was a very long summary. Thanks for sticking with me, but I think that's enough context, for now. Please let me know what you think. This story has been so self-indulgent; it would be nice to know if someone liked it as much as I do.
HERE WITH YOU
Kagome felt a gentle shake to her knee and grumbled, nuzzling deeper into the warmth at her side.
“C’mon, baby,” Inuyasha’s deep voice rumbled before soft lips brushed her cheek. “You gotta get up.”
She groaned and squeezed her eyes tighter, unwilling to break from the pull of slumber. She was comfortable dammit, and she could feel by the heaviness of her body that she hadn’t slept long enough.
Why did he always do this?! Every damn time!
In the afterglow of their love making, when her muscles were liquid and sleep started calling for her, Inuyasha would rouse her and send her on her way before morning. It hurt. She just wanted to fall asleep next to him and pretend for just a moment that they were a real couple—not whatever this was.
“’Gome,” he prompted again with another shake to her knee.
“Oh, come on,” she whined. “Why do I always gotta go? None of the other girls leave before sunrise.”
She felt him stiffen beside her and braced for his cutting response. Instead, he released a soft whine, nuzzling his nose against hers.
“Baby, there are no other girls,” he whispered, voice tight. “And I swear, I’ll never let you leave before sunrise again,but you need to wake up; we’re here.”
The entire morning came back to Kagome in a rush. She sat straight up in her seat, blinking at the plane and it’s slowly deboarding passengers. She was home, in LA, with Inuyasha. Her eyes snapped up to meet his golden gaze; he looked so sad and resigned.
Her half-conscious words surfaced in her mind as her cheeks grew hot. “S-sorry, I didn’t mean that.”
“Well, I did,” he replied, flicking open his seatbelt and moving to stand.
Impending tears pricked at her eyes as she lurched forward and grabbed his arm. “Wait! Inu, please don’t be mad.”
He turned back to her with brows furrowed, grasping her chin between his thumb and forefinger. “Don’t worry about me being mad, okay? I’m not; I’m just grabbing your suitcase.” He leaned down and planted a swift kiss to her lips before moving into the aisle.
Kagome sat back in her chair and pushed a hand through her bangs, still so disoriented from sleep that she forgot to chastise him for the overly familiar action. She couldn’t drum up her earlier resentment anyway. It was difficult when he was being so sweet and attentive.
She gathered up her purse from the floor, hiked it onto her shoulder, and scooted towards the aisle, reaching to take her suitcase from Inuyasha’s hands. She frowned when he didn’t pass it to her and instead stooped down to grab his duffle.
He turned towards her with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Ready?”
“I can carry that,” she replied while motioning to her bag.
Inuyasha shook his head. “I got it. C’mon.”
He made a space for her in front of him and allowed her into line. They filed out behind other passengers.
“Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
They scooted forward a few inches at a time, ignoring the accidental jostles they received in the process.
Someone still in their chair mumbled something as they passed.
Inuyasha snarled from behind her, “Shut up and mind your own damn business.”
“What did he say?” Kagome asked, looking over her shoulder as they trudged forward.
He scowled. “Nothin’, just another asshole tryin’ to be funny. On this flight they’re a dime a dozen, apparently.”
She shook her head and giggled at the slight dusting of pink across his nose when Inuyasha’s eyes widened. He dropped his bag and reached forward to wrap hand around her arm, pulling her back against his chest and saving her from face-planting into a suitcase wheel.
Kagome was shell-shocked for a moment before warm breath tickled the hair against her ear.
“Careful, baby. Eyes forward,” Inuyasha whispered before releasing her and grabbing his duffle once again.
She nodded and waved off the apology from the man in front of her while trying to steady her fluttering heart. She had never received this kind of attention from him before and it was throwing her off. Every ounce of his focus seemed attuned to her; she could even feel his aura enveloping her like a protective blanket. It was overwhelming.
She slid forward when the line started to move, fanning her flaming face; it didn’t help. Kagome rose on tiptoe and glanced to the front door. Only a little longer and she could take a free breath without him towering behind her and saturating every molecule of air with his delicious sandalwood scent. It was making her head swim.
“Anxious to get away?” Inuyasha purred into her ear.
Kagome tripped over her feet, bumping the person in front of her. They tossed a glare over their shoulder. She mumbled an apology as they neared the cockpit and blessedly the front door. She could hear the cheery voices of the flight attendants just a few people ahead of her.
Inuyasha leaned closer and whispered, “Breathe, ‘Gome.”
“I’m trying,” Kagome hissed, glaring over her shoulder. “It’s not my fault you smell so damn g—”
“Thank you for flying with us today,” one of those cheery voices interrupted.
All the color drained from her face as she whipped around and stumbled over a ‘thank you’, rushing out the door and into the open air. Kagome took a deep breath and almost choked on the scent of exhaust. As long as it wasn’t ‘throw your underwear at me’ sandalwood, she was fine.
She turned to face the no doubt mocking expression of her companion, but Inuyasha didn’t react beyond setting her suitcase on the floor and rolling it it behind him up the ramp.
Kagome blinked. Was he just going to ignore all that?
She caught up to his side and glanced at his face. As she stared a corner of his mouth began to twitch upwards.
Kagome frowned and waved a hand at him. “Go on. Laugh it up.”
“What?” he replied with a chuckle. “You nearly hyperventilated because I smell so damn good. What’s funny about that?”
“You don’t know that I was going to say good,” she snapped.
Inuyasha tossed her a smug smile. “You’re right; you were probably gonna say great.”
“Or gross,” she grumbled, stomping ahead of him towards the terminal.
She turned around just inside to give him a piece of her mind but lost her ire as she looked him over. Although he was laughing, the mirth didn’t reach his eyes and even his ears were hanging lower than normal.
Kagome’s gaze found the white toes of her Chucks, wrapping her hands around her purse strap. Some matching shoes in red invaded her line of vision.
“Hey,” he said, giving her arm a nudge. “What’s wrong? I was just teasin’.”
“It’s not that,” she said, peeking up at him through her bangs. “I was just wondering, do you have somewhere to stay tonight?”
“Not really,” he replied with a shrug, but his ears perked. “Figured I would deal with that once we landed.”
Kagome cleared her throat and looked away, squeezing the leather between her hands. “Well, you can stay with me, if you want. I don’t have an extra bedroom, but I have a couch that’s pretty—”
Inuyasha reached forward and tilted her head up until she saw his sparkling golden eyes. “That sounds perfect,” he purred, rubbing his thumb along her bottom lip.
She was momentarily stunned but managed a nod.
“Was it gorgeous?” he asked with a fangy grin that lit up his whole face.
Kagome’s brow knit, not understanding his meaning until the light finally dawned. “No, it was grody!” she shouted while whipping around and storming off.
“Nah,” he replied, following a step behind. “It was probably glorious.”
“It was grimy!”
“How about grand?”
“How about gag me!”
Inuyasha stumbled and coughed before Kagome registered what had flown past her lips. She slapped a hand over her mouth in horror.
He shook the dazed look away from his face and smirked. “If you insist, baby.”
Kagome flushed. “I didn’t mean it like that!”
Inuyasha laughed and leaned down to press a kiss to her cheek. “You’re cute when you’re flustered.”
“S-stop it,” she stuttered.
His brow furrowed, turning serious. “Maybe it was a phrase instead. Something like ‘good enough to eat’.”
“Ugh,” she groaned and turned on her heel, stomping away at a good clip. “Will you drop it already? Geez, you’re like a d—" Kagome sputtered out a laugh mid-sentence.
“What?” Inuyasha asked from behind her. “What is it?”
She turned around to see him staring at her like a very curious dog, head tilted to the side and ears perked to her amusement. Kagome doubled over, giggling until there were tears in her eyes.
“’Gome, people are starting to stare like you’ve gone nuts,” he whispered. “What the hell is so funny?”
Her laughter petered out to a slight chuckle as she shook her head. “Nothing, it’s just in your nature, I guess.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
She offered him a coy smile and stepped forward, taking her suitcase handle from his hand. Inuyasha huffed in protest but was soothed by the way she intertwined their fingers.
“C’mon, Puppy,” Kagome purred while pulling him to the doors. “Now we just need to figure out where I parked.”
“You didn’t take a picture of your spot?” he groaned.
She laughed. “Do I ever?”
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I've recently discovered Pinterest, and I am very mad I haven't sooner. I have discovered so many things of amazing fanart, but this one caught my eye and gave me ideas for this sooooo enjoy.
Don't be surprised if I end up writing more fics on the other fanart things I find hehe
♧♡◇☆ Royalty Must Live On ♡◇☆♧
Pairing: Prince!Hwang Hyunjin x Prince!Reader
Warnings: Forced marriage, a tiny bit of violence, toxic behavior from Hyunjin's mother, some mentions of homophobia, this gets pretty sad and dark at some points, slight dom/sub dynamics, sub!Hyunjin, dom!Reader, unprotected mlm sex, soft sex, tension, virgin!Hyunjin, nipple play, small handjob, REALLY LONG
English is not my first language; this is not proofread so beware grammar mistakes and spelling errors.
I DID NOT CREATE THIS, I FOUND IT ON PINTEREST.
A soft knock echoes through your room as you button up your shirt. You look up towards the door, and give the person a response. "Who is it?"
"It's me." Your mother responds. "Are you almost ready? They're to be here soon."
"Almost. I just need to finished getting dressed. I will be down in a minute." You respond, looking back down at your shirt. "I won't be long, mother."
"I trust you won't." You then hear her footsteps slowly descending down the hallway. You close your eyes and let out a breath. The people you and your parents were meeting with was a family from a near-by kingdom. Your parents and them had made a deal with them, and that lead to them coming to your kingdom to stay for a few days to see how things work with your family and your kingdom. Also, to attend your annual Christmas ball. So, it was important for you to look your best.
You open your eyes again and continue with getting dressed. After finishing with tucking your shirt into your trousers, you put on your overcoat and your crown. You give yourself one last look in your large mirror, and make sure you don't have a hair out of place before nodding to yourself and exiting your room.
As you descend down the stairs to where your parents stand, you look out the window and watch as their carriage arrives in front of your home. Perfect timing.
Your servants are quick to open the large doors for the three to enter. You stand behind your parents with your hands holding each other in front of you, in your best posture you can manage as they all walk in.
"Hello. Welcome to our home." Your father says as all three of you bow. As you stand up straight again, they're then the ones to bow. Your father then introduces himself and your mother, not breaking his charming grin.
He steps forward so he's in front of his parents, and gives a small bow.
"Pleasure to meet you." The woman says before introducing herself and her husband. "And this is our son, Hwang Hyunjin." Her and her husband step aside to reveal a rather handsome boy. He had long, black hair that was tied up mostly, by a red ribbon, besides the little side bangs he had, with these beautiful dark brown eyes and a pair of light pink plump lips to go with it. His skin was a light honey sort of colour, and looked to be soft and sort of silky-like. He also had a little beauty mark under his right eye.
"Ah yes," your father steps aside to reveal you, "this is our son, L/N Y/N."
This time, you step forward so your in front of your parents. You return the bow to him and his family. When you stand up straight again, you put on your most charming smile that you can manage as you look between the three. "I would like to say how pleased we are to have you here, and I hope that you all will enjoy your stay." You pause for a moment, taking a breath. "If you'd follow me, I could give you a tour of the place, and show you to where you all will be staying."
"Yes, that'd be lovely." The woman responds, giving you a smile.
After the tour, you showed the king and queen to their room so they could settle in and get some rest--if needed. Meanwhile, you decided to try and get to know Hyunjin a bit more. "Would you like me to show you back to your room, or, if you would like, I could so you around my personal garden?"
Hyunjin looks at you with a bit confusion. "Why would you do that?"
You give a small shrug. "It's been a long while since someone even remotely close to my age has been here, so I want to take a bit of an advantage of your company. You don't have to go if you don't want to."
Hyunjin thinks for a moment. It was odd to him. Usually the princes and princesses he meets aren't normally as friendly as you are being. Most of them are very snobby and full of themselves. He must admit, it was quite nice how friendly you were being. And so, he gives you a nod. "I wouldn't mind seeing it."
You give him a small grin before motioning for him to follow you. He quickly does, and you begin to make your way to your garden.
The walk there was a rather short one, and was made in silence. It wasn't a necessarily awkward, nor bad silence— it was more a there's-nothing-to-be-said silence. Once arrived, Hyunjin was quickly blown away.
Your garden was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Not only were there gorgeous flowers, but various fruits and vegetables that looked delicious. There were also astonishing trees that grew in just the right way to make an arch around the cobblestone pathway. There was a thin layer of snow covering everything, that only added to the beauty. The flowers varied in many different colours and sizes. Hyunjin couldn't even name more then five of the flowers he saw, there were just so many.
The flowers were pretty cluttered, but that only made them appear more astonishing to him. The many colours mixed with the dark wood of the trees somehow seem even more appealing to the boy, and with the snow on top of it all—Hyunjin had felt like he was seeing Heaven right in front of him. "What do you think?"
Your voice brought him back to reality. You almost chuckled when you looked over at him. His mouth was slightly agape, and his eyes were wide. He closes his mouth as he looks over at you. "It's. . . beautiful."
Hyunjin walks over to the little apple tree that displayed the most delicious-looking dark red apples. He looks back at you, as if asking permission to take one. You give him a single nod, telling him he can. And so, he grabs one and pulls it off the branch. The other branches shake a bit, and a small bit of snow falls off them at Hyunjin's feet.
"Are they safe to eat?" He asks, turning around after doing so.
"Of course." You smile. "All the fruits and vegetables are. Take what you'd like."
Hyunjin grins back in response before taking a bite of the apple. He closes his eyes as the flavors flood his mouth. The apple was the perfect combination of bitter and sweet, with a tinge of salty-sour mix. To top it off, the skin of the apple wasn't that sort of paper-y that you find on regular market-bought apples—no, this one had the perfect type that doesn't get stuck in your teeth after chewing it for a bit. The texture of the apple itself was just the right mix of soft yet crunchy. Hyunjin had never had something as ravishing as this. His eyes open wide and his mouth curves into a wide grin. "This is the most delectable fruit I've ever had!"
You couldn't help but chuckle at his reaction. "I'm very glad you enjoy it."
His grin widens as he takes another bite. He makes a little noise that sounds a bit like a moan as chews the apple. "How did you get them to be this good? I've had hundreds of apples before, but none of them are even close to being as good as this one."
"You know, I'm honestly not quite sure." You respond. "I've just always had a sort of green thumb."
"I would say so." Hyunjin responds as he licks his lips, some of the juice dripping onto his chin.
"Oh, you got a little juice on your chin." You tell him, pointing to your chin at the spot where a bit of it lays. He lifts his thumb up to try and wipe it off.
"Did I get it?" He asks. He didn't.
"Uhm, no you didn't." You mumble, grabbing your little handkerchief from your pocket. You them walk over to him. "Would you mind if I got it?"
It was an awkward thing to ask, and you have no idea why you did—but Hyunjin shook his head. So, you stepped forward and raised your cloth and wiped his chin.
Hyunjin couldn't help but feel a bit flustered at your action, and he wasn't sure why, but he couldn't stop himself from looking you in the eye while you did your action. You looked back at him after you finished getting the little droplet off his chin, and you both just kind of paused.
Neither of you weren't quite understanding of why you held that eye contact for as long as you did, but it just felt like the right thing to do. That was, until you decided that it was getting a bit to, dare I say, warm between you two. So, you step away from him and clear your throat as you put away your handkerchief. "Uhm, there are many other fruits that you could try, as well. Vegetables too."
Hyunjin gives you a grin, nodding his head a bit. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't get the weird little warm and tickly feeling out of his stomach. What was this? It felt like butterflies in his stomach. But why? "How many different types do you have?"
"Normally, I have many dozens of plants. Due to the cold weather, the numbers have shrunken, but there are still plenty." You explain to him as he walks around the other plants.
Hyunjin pauses for a moment before turning around to look at you. "May I ask something?"
"Go ahead."
"How come you didn't bring my parents here on part of the tour?" He asks, taking another bite of the apple right after.
You think for a moment. It seems as though he doesn't know yet, so you better not tell him. "My garden is something I don't really like showing to people often. To be perfectly honest, I have no idea why I decided to show it to you." Yes you do. "I think I just felt like you would like it. I'm not to sure about your parents, though."
Hyunjin laughs, nodding his head in understanding. "I can tell you now, my mother and father would have no interest in anything of this sorts. At least, not like I do."
You tilt your head. "What is it you mean?"
Hyunjin frowns a bit as he thinks. "Well, my parents aren't the type to really enjoy beautiful things such as gardens. I've always wanted to grow my own, but my mother and father forbid it. They think that things like gardening, cooking, and such are for women and women only."
You nod, quickly understanding. "Do you think that?"
He shakes his head. "No. I don't really think that people should have a specific role to stick with just because of their gender, but I did think it for most of my life. Only recently have I learned that nothing should be assigned to one gender only." He lets out a sigh. "But, due to my parents beliefs, I was never really able to do all the things I wanted to do." Hyunjin looks back up at you, cringing a bit. "I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have talked so much-"
"Oh, no, no! I don't mind! Talk all you want. I'm a good listener." You smile at him. "What are the things you've always wanted to do?"
Hyunjin can't help but blush a bit at your response. He can't remember the last time he was able to talk to someone the way he is now. Safe to say he's enjoying it. "I've always wanted to learn to cook and bake. It seems fun. Along with painting, and making clothes."
You give him a smile. "I know how to cook, bake, and paint. And I am actually trying to convince one of my maids to teach me to sew."
He looks up at you with hopeful eyes. "Really?"
You nod. "Yes. I can teach you if you'd like?"
Hyunjin grins at you, but then he frowns. You look at him confused. "Are you alright?"
He nods. "Yes, perfectly fine. It's just, we won't see each other after this, so when would you have time to teach me?"
You bite your lip. So he doesn't know. "I'm sure we can figure something out. We're both adults, we should be able to take a carriage to each other without our parents permission."
Hyunjin shakes his head. "Maybe with your parents. Mine would never allow such things."
You shake your head. "Maybe, maybe not. We'll never know unless we try." You say. "Let us talk about other things, now."
Hyunjin nods. "May I ask you a few things about yourself?"
You smile at him and give him a nod. "Ask away."
"I'm sorry, mother but what is it you want me to do?" Hyunjin asks in disbelief. He wasn't sure how to process the news he had just received.
"It's not want, darling, it's need. We need to get our family connected to theirs, and the only way for that to happen is through marriage." His mother responds, managing to keep her composure. He blinks at her, expecting her to say that it is some sort of joke, but no, she remains still.
"Yes, I understand that, but why me? Why not a cousin or other relative to us be the one to marry? Besides, he's a man! I can't marry another man!" His mother closes her eyes and lets out a breath.
"Hyunjin, no. It must be you. No one else in the family is able to do it." His mother responds as she opens her eyes again. She then begins to walk over to him, placing her hands on the side of his face once in front of him, making him look down at her. "You must do this for your family. It is the only way for us to continue this life."
Hyunjin lets out a breath, reaching up and gently grabbing his mothers hands and pushing them off his face. "My family has done almost nothing to help with me, why should I be the one to suffer through this marriage if they have done nothing for us?"
The sound of his mothers hand colliding with Hyunjin's cheek followed by the sting is the response. His head turns to the side as he closes his eyes. "Don't you dare disrespect your family like that! We have done so much for you, and this is how you repay us? By saying we've done nothing?" His mother lets out a scoff. "I expect you to be better then this!"
Hyunjin sighs, turning back to look at his mother. "I-I'm sorry, mother. I'm just a bit shocked at the news. I didn't mean any disrespect."
"Well, compose yourself, Hyunjin. Even if you didn't mean it, is still came off that way. Learn to control what you say and how you say it." His mother responds. Hyunjin bows his head, closing his eyes as he does so. "I know the news is sudden, and a shock to you, but you'll need to push through it. You're a man, act like it. Understand?"
Hyunjin nods, continuing to keep his head down and his eyes closed. "Yes, mother. I understand. I'm sorry for my actions."
His mother nods. "Good. You should be." She then turns around and walks to the door of the bedroom he was staying in. "Now, you better be ready in time for the ball tonight. I won't accept you being late."
"Yes, mother." Hyunjin is quick to say. His mother begins to exit his room before he stops her. "Is this the reason you brought us here? So we would get married?"
She turns he head to the side, looking at him over her shoulder. "Yes, Hyunjin."
He nods and looks down for a second before speaking again. "Does Y/N know about the plan?"
"Yes." His mother takes a breath. "This plan has been in place since he, Y/N, was born. Our families both agreed to have our only children marry, no matter what."
"May I ask why?"
"Because our royalty must live on. And all the other kingdoms around here are not nearly big enough to even consider us binding with them." She takes a breath and closes her eyes as she turns back towards the door. "There is no discussion about this, Hyunjin. It is going to happen, whether you want it to or not."
Hyunjin hesitates a moment. "But. . ." he lets out a breath. "We won't be able to have kids. How will the royalty live on if we are not able to reproduce?"
"A child is going to be given to you years into your marriage."
"How?"
"Someone from our village will bear one up, and whoever the child is will be given to you both to raise. Everything has been planned out, and has been for your entire life."
"Won't we be looked down on for us both being men?"
"You will."
"What will we do about that?"
"Nothing. There is nothing to be done. It will happen, nothing to stop it. Only the important people will understand the situation."
"What about-" His mother cuts him off.
"Enough, Hyunjin. No more questions. Just, get ready and be downstairs in two hours." Hyunjin slumps down.
"Yes, mother." His mother nods and exits the room, closing the door behind her. After he hears her footsteps fade away, he lets out a breath. He closes his eyes and sits down on the edge of his bed before placing his head in his hands.
'Why me?'
After he managed to bottle up what he was feeling, Hyunjin put on his best outfit—a royal blue button-up blouse, black trousers, his homeland sash, and his black overcoat with his home-village pins attached to it. He tied his hair back into a bun with some chopsticks holding it together. To tie it all together, he placed on a few of his rings that he only wore for special occasions, and put his crown onto the top of his head.
He takes one last look at himself in the mirror before taking a deep breath.
'You got this.'
Hyunjin then hears a knock at his door. This one was a gentle knock, and he immediately knew it wasn't his mother or father. Before he can ask, your voice rings out. "It's um, it's me. May I come in?"
Hyunjin looks down for a moment, swallowing before he responds. "You may."
He quickly turns back to the mirror, adjusting his sash a bit as he hears the door open and close, followed by your soft footsteps. "I'm guessing that you were also told?"
"About the marriage?"
"Yes."
"I was." You nods, looking down at your shoes for a moment before looking back up at him. It was then that you fully took in his outfit. He looked. . .breathtaking, to say the least. The way his trousers hugged his waist and upper thighs in just the right way, mixed with the slightly loose shirt that seemed to accentuate his biceps perfectly, and with the way his trousers showed off his little behind- no. Nope, you are not noticing that. You clear your throat and look up at his face. "You look nice."
Hyunjin nods, failing to hide the small flush that creeps onto his cheeks. "Thank you. As do you."
"Thank you." You respond, clearing your throat a bit. "So, our parents want us to enter the dance together, linking our arms."
Hyunjin furrows his eyebrows, looking over at you in confusion. So, you explain. "They are also using this event to announce our marriage, so they need us to enter in at the end of their announcement with our arms linked."
"Oh." Hyunjin responds, giving a small nod of his head. "When is the announcement starting?"
"It will be starting in a few moments. Your mother sent me up here to get you." You respond. "We should probably get going, if your ready."
"I am.'' You nod.
"Let's get on then." You respond, stepping aside and motioning for Hyunjin to go first. He gives a small bow as he passes by you before exiting the room, you following him. You shut the door as you exit.
The walk to the ball room was met in awkward silence. Neither of you could really think of anything to say. Really, what could you say? Hyunjin just found out that he's going to be married to you, a practical stranger to him, and another man at that. Then again, he knew he would be forced to marry another royal child, but he didn't think it'd be another prince. If he's being perfectly honest, he can not remember a single time in history of a prince marrying another prince. Nor of a princess marrying another princess. It's barbaric. But. . . why does the thought of marrying another man seem not as bad as he's making it out to be? Hyunjin couldn't find a reason why he thought this.
Finally, Hyunjin couldn't take the silence anymore. It was intoxicating. He clears his throat before speaking. "How long have you known that you were to be married to me?"
You think for a moment. "Really, ever since I was a young child. I was told at a very young age that I already had a partner for marriage."
He tilts his head. "Why were you told at such a young age?"
"I'm not sure. Maybe it's because when I was a young boy, I made friends with this one girl and we thought that we were in love, so I told my parents that I had found my wife. They told my I didn't, and I got confused, so they explained it to me that I already had someone to be married to." You explain. "However, they didn't tell me that it was going to be to a man until I was and adult. Safe to say that it was a shock."
"What happened to the girl?" Hyunjin asks.
"She, um, she died." You pause, gulping a bit. "He- I mean, she, got pneumonia, and sadly passed."
"Oh. . ." Hyunjin trails off. "I-I am truly, very sorry."
You shake your head. "It's alright. I was ten when it happened." You take a breath before continuing. "Did you ever have a woman you loved?"
Hyunjin shakes his head. "No, my parents never allowed for me to even think about being with someone. I always wondered why, up until I found out. . . you know."
You nod. Just then, you arrive in front of the ball room doors, just in time to hear the beginning of the speech.
'Here we go.'
It was around the middle of the ball now, and Hyunjin was no where to be seen. You weren't even sure when he disappeared, but it had been a long while since.
"If you'll excuse me, my lady, I must go find my fiancé." You say to the woman you were talking to. You give her a kiss on her knuckles and a bow as you leave. After you do, you look around a bit to try and see if you can spot Hyunjin. You can't, and so, you try and wrack through your brain to think of where he could've been. Maybe his room? So that's where you decided to head first.
Of course, when you got there, he wasn't there. So, you try to think of somewhere else he may be. But, anywhere you though of, you went only to find nothing. You felt like you had just gone on a wild goose chase. You tried to think of any other place he could be, and that's when it hits you; your garden. The only place you had not looked. And so, you began your journey to there.
When you finally arrived there, you didn't spot him right away. But you could tell he had been there recently, due to the fresh footprints in the snow that covered the path. You noticed that they lead through the arch and into the dark oak gazebo that you had. You follow them and find Hyunjin standing there, in the middle of the small build looking around it with astonishment. The walls, roof, and pedestals were covered in vines with roses blossomed among them in such a perfect way that it looked overgrown but not in the normal plants-covering-everything way. The floor was clear of the vines and full flowers, but still had fallen rose pedals scattered about to make it seem. . . romantic, almost. There were also candles scattered about on the floor, none lit, with little glass plates under them to catch the wax. If they were to be lit, this place would look like the most romantic place on earth.
You had forgotten to show him this part.
You were about to try and grab his attention, until you found yourself getting distracted. He looked absolutely stunning. The moon and starlight bounced off his skin and made him seem glittery. The light also reflected in his dark eyes and caused little sparkles that only made him look like he had a little galaxy in them. He seemed to be glowing from the night lighting mixed with the little snowflakes that rested in his hair. And from the light drizzle, more gathered while the others melted and caused more light to shine from him. A few rose pedals had fallen onto him as well; some landing in his hair and some on his shoulders, and somehow making him appear even more attractive. The crown on his head, silver with red ruby's on the tips of every mound, somehow made his eyes pop even more.
You take a breath before catching his attention. "Hello." Hyunjin jumps a bit at your voice, spinning around quickly. "Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to scare you."
He shakes his head. "No, it's okay. I was just distracted."
You nod before beginning to walk over to him. When you arrive next to him, you look around the building. "Breathtaking isn't it?"
Hyunjin nods, following your eyes to look around at the place. "It truly is."
You think for a moment before biting your lip slightly. "I know how I can make it even better."
He looks over at you. "I'm not sure if it can get any better. It's just so. . . wondrous. How can it get any better than this?"
You can't help but grin a small bit. "Just watch."
You pull out your pack of matches and begin to light all the candles on the floor. Slowly, the area begins to come to life, almost, even more then it seemed to before. Hyunjin feels silly now. Of course it could get better. He never should have doubted it.
By the time you finished, Hyunjin was already in awe at how much the gazebo changed from just a bit of lighting. It was then that he noticed the roof was covered in paintings. It must've been too dark to see them before. The paintings on the roof was a field filled with butterflies, caterpillars, a fox family in the distance, and a person Hyunjin didn't know. It was a man who looked to be around yours and Hyunjin's age, maybe a bit younger, and looked to be smiling widely at a butterfly that was on his finger.
There was something about the way the person was painted that Hyunjin couldn't quite place his finger on. The person who painted this clearly had some devotion to this man, with how perfect he seemed. And with how detailed this painting was, this didn't just come from a simple thought.
It was a memory. And it looked to be a very important one.
"Did you paint that?" Hyunjin asks, looking back at you after you had finished lighting the candles. You look up at the painting and almost tear up. You gulp as you look back down at Hyunjin. Lucky for you, he was still looking at the painting.
"I did." You say, trying not to let the lump in your throat altar your speech.
"Who is that in the painting?" Hyunjin asks, looking back down at you. "Is he your friend?"
You hesitate for a moment. "It's. . . best I do not say who that is."
He tilts his head. "Why is that?"
You shake your head. "You wouldn't understand. Nor would you ever look at me the same way."
You then turn around so your back was towards him. Hyunjin thinks for a moment, trying to think of who the man could be. A thought crosses in his head, and it seems to be the only explanation; "Was he your lover?"
You freeze, not sure how to react. You slouch in defeat, letting out a long sigh. You pause for what seems like hours before you respond. "He was."
He wasn't sure why, but Hyunjin didn't feel any confusion on why you had another man for a lover. It was almost as if he understood it, almost as if he knew why you did, almost as if he knew exactly how it felt. In all honesty, he probably did know exactly how it felt to fall for another man. "The story you told me, about the girl, that's not true. Is it?"
You shake your head. "None of it was."
Hyunjin nods even though he knows you can't see it. He nibbles on his lip as he debates the next question. But, in the end, be decides to ask. "Can you. . . tell the real story?"
You look back over your shoulder at him. "Do you actually want to hear it? It doesn't have a good ending."
Hyunjin nods. "Only if you are okay with telling it."
You turn back and let out a sigh. "The man in the paintings name is Jeongin. Yang Jeongin. He was our stable boy, and we became very close friends after many years of him working for us. After a few more years, I started to feel. . . differently about him. I wasn't sure what it was at first, and I couldn't think of any valid explanation for my feelings for a long time. That was. . . until I invited him on a picnic and somehow ended up kissing him.
"It felt so right, and neither of us could understand why it did, but after that, I think we both made the realization that the thing we were feeling for each other was love.
"We kept our relationship very private and in secret for almost two years, until my mother walked into my room and saw him and I making love. She fired him immediately and sent him back to live in the village. I cried, and begged, and screamed at her not to, but to no avail. When I asked her why she did it, she told me that I was to be married to someone else and I couldn't have a relation with anyone else.
"Him and I continued to send letters to each other, despite my parents orders not to, until one day, his letters stopped. I snuck out of the castle in the middle of the night and went to his house in the village. I found it empty and asked around." You take a shaky breath as the memory of it comes hitting you. No matter how much you tried to stop them, tears formed in your eyes as you continued on. "His father had found out about us and beat him to death."
Your voice cracked at the last sentence and you sniffled before continuing. "The village people weren't sure what to do with his body, so I took it and buried him in a secret area in my garden. I painted this," you motion to roof, "the first year we were together.
"The painting is from one of the first romantic nights we ever had together. I showed him to this field that was always full of butterflies, and we had one of the most wonderful nights either of us could ever ask for.
"After I buried him, I couldn't even come close to this building without tearing up. The pain was so much and so unbearable. It took me close to a year before I could come in here, and when I finally did," you walk over to one of the roses that was in bloom and run your finger along one of the pedals, "these roses had grown all over this place. And when I looked up at him, the roses formed a heart around him." You point up at him. "It's still there."
It was only then that Hyunjin noticed that there was in fact, a heart shape around Jeongin's head. He looks back over at you, noticing the single tear that fell from your eye as you stare up at the roof. You quickly wipe it away though. "He did leave me with something. A letter. A final letter that he wrote while in the healers. I still haven't read it."
Hyunjin looks down at his hands, unsure of what to say. He has this overwhelming need to try and give you any of the comfort he can offer. He hesitantly begins to walk over to you, and once he arrives behind you, he gently places his hand on your shoulder. "Y/N," he begins, "I know that I can't give you much comfort, but I want you to know that I truly am utterly sorry that you had to go through that."
You begin to rub your fingers with your thumb, debating in your head whether you should or shouldn't. In the end, you decide to. You raise your hand and place it on top of his, giving his hand a light squeeze. "Thank you, Hyunjin. It. . . means a lot."
Hyunjin looks down for a moment. You hear him let out a sigh before feeling his hand leave your shoulder. You allow for your shoulders to slump and your head to drop, until you feel Hyunjin wrap his arms around your waist and hug you from behind. You tense up at first, shocked by his action, before you relax again. You turn around so your facing him and you hug him. It's a bit odd, since you are a bit taller then him, but you bury your face into his shoulder. You can't stop the sob that escapes your mouth as you finally allow for the tears to fall now.
"Thank you. . ." You whisper before the sobs take over again. Hyunjin isn't sure what goes over him, but his instincts cause him to hold you a small bit tighter. His instincts just told him that he needed to show you he was there for you. And he wasn't sure why, but he didn't mind it.
That night, when you got back to your room, you started pacing back and forth. You weren't sure what it was, but something was eating away at you. Something was keeping you restless. You just had this feeling like you needed to do something. And you had an itching suspicious that you knew exactly what it was. You needed to read Jeongin's letter.
You were awake most of the night, sitting on your bed and chewing on your nails. You really didn't want to read the letter, but you knew you had to. You knew that you would always have the dread of it hanging above you the longer you put it off.
It was around three in the morning when you finally pushed yourself up and walked over to your desk. You open the drawer that you kept all of Jeongin's letters in, and grab the unopened one at the top. You're about to open it when you hear a voice in your head say: 'No. Not here.'
You close your eyes and take a deep breath before placing the letter in an inside pocket of your overcoat—you had not changed since the ball—and quietly exit your room and walk to your garden. You make sure no one is following you on your way to your destination.
Once you arrive at the place you knew you needed to go—Jeongin's grave—you then get down and kneel in front of the headstone you had for him, not caring about the snow. You take a breath before speaking. "My love," you swallow, "I know I haven't been to see you in a while, I've been busy. But, I'm here now, and I'm going to finally read your letter."
You take a shaky breath as you take out the letter. "I probably should have done this a long time ago, but I just haven't felt ready. I hope you're not too mad at me for it." You can practically hear him: 'Of course I'm not mad at you, silly.' He would say in a teasing voice. The teasing voice you missed. "Okay, I'm going to start now."
Your hands are shaky as you open up the letter. You close your eyes and let out a breath before opening them and beginning to scan your eyes over the words.
My dearest Y/N,
I am in the healer right now, after my father got a bit too angry at me. He found out about us, I'm sure that can tell you enough about that.
The healer told me that I should make a full recovery, but I know that's not true. I can feel it, Y/N, I'm dying. It's something with my head, I'm sure. I can barely sleep, my ears are always ringing, I constantly feel like my stomach is going to come up, my neck feels stiff, light is torture, and nothing is seeming to make sense anymore.
By the time you are reading this letter, I will be long dead. I know that it is going to take you a long time before you do, and before you ask, no, I am not mad at you for it.
When you read this letter, you probably met your future marriage partner that your parents have set up for you, and you are maybe married by now. If not, well, I'm not sure. But I want you to know this: you will mourn, you will grieve, and that is perfectly fine. Take as long as you need, but don't let my death hold you back. Don't let my death stop you from falling in love. I know that I will probably cause you to be hesitant, and that is okay, but don't let it stop you from finding someone.
Do you remember our first picnic together? Where we shared our first kiss? I hope you do. Let that, and all of our other memories together bring you comfort in your darkest days. Let the gazebo with the painting of me be the place you go when you feel the need to escape your life.
I just want you to know, Y/N, I love you, and I always will. And I want you to know that, no matter what, I will always be by your side, even in death. You may not know it, or feel it, but I will be there. I promise you.
Your love, forever and always,
Jeongin
You cover your mouth as the tears blur your vision and the sobs wrack through your body. Your body shakes as you cry, holding the letter close to your chest as you curl over on the ground. You didn't bother with trying to hold back your loud sobs, seeing as though no one would hear you anyway.
"Jeongin. . . my love. . . I'm sorry. . ."
When you had gotten back to your room, it was probably around five in the morning. Your clothes were soaking wet now, and you were shivering. But, on the somewhat bright-side, you felt like a huge weight was lifted off of your shoulders after that.
As you were making your way back to your room, you failed to notice Hyunjin peaking his head out of his room after being woken up by the sound of your footsteps squelching with each step you took. He popped his head out of his doorway and spotted you entering your room.
You placed the letter in the drawer it was in before and quickly change into your sleepwear. As soon as your head hits your pillow, you fall asleep.
It was a dreamless night for you, something that is normal for you at this point, and when you were awoken by someone knocking at your door, you couldn't help but groan as you push yourself up from your, seemingly more, comfortable bed. You yawn and stretch as you make your way to your door. When you open the door, you find your personal maid standing there. "So sorry to wake you, sir."
You shake your head. "It's alright. What is it?"
"The queen has requested for you, your fiancé as well. I have already informed him." You nod.
"Thank you. I'll be right there." She nods and turns to walk away. You close the door and take a moment to try and wake yourself up more before putting on your daywear.
It takes a bit longer for you to walk to where you assume your mother is awaiting, as you are still incredibly tired, but you somehow manage. When you arrive, you find your mother laughing at something Hyunjin had said while he was chuckling along. Hyunjin's mother was also there. When she spots you, she stands up. "Ah, Y/N darling. Perfect timing."
You nod. "What is the trouble, mother?"
She chuckles. "Oh, silly. No trouble. I brought the two of you here to discuss your wedding plans."
"Isn't it a bit early for that?" You ask.
"Of course not." Hyunjin's mother interferes. She stands up as well and moves to stand next to your mother. "You know that it won't take long for everything to be prepared, so why not get it done and over with as soon as we can?"
"I. . . suppose." You respond shuffling your feet a bit. "What I really meant was, isn't it a bit early in the day for this?"
"What ever do you mean, darling? It is the middle of the day." Your mother responds, laughing a bit. "Is the clock in your room broken again?"
You shake your head. "No, I just didn't look at it and I thought it was much earlier. My apologies."
Your mother waves it away as if it were an insect of some sort. "I was thinking that we could hold the ceremony in that little gazebo you have in your garden. It'd be the perfect place for a small little event." Your mother says. "Of course, you'd have to get rid of the flowers and painting that are on it, but once you do that, it'd be just right."
That grabs your attention, your head shoots up and you have to stop yourself from leashing out. "Mother, I am not quite comfortable with that."
"Why not? It's about time you cleaned that place." That only causes you to clench your fists at your side. "Besides, with all those beautiful flowers you have growing there, it would be very romantic."
"I am aware of that, mother, but I don't believe we have to have the ceremony there. Don't we have any other places it could be held?"
"Of course we do, but that place would be the best place. It could also give the painter an even better background when he is painting you both." Your mother pauses for a moment. "Why do you insist on keeping that place the way it is?"
That catches you off guard. You open your mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. You can't think of a response to her, so instead, you look down at your feet.
"Great! It's settled then. Y/N, I want you to work on cleaning that place up as soon as you can, and-"
"Wait!" Hyunjin is quick to butt-in. You look up at him to find him moving to stand next to you. Your mother turns towards him as well.
"Yes?"
"Uh, well, here's the thing," he begins as he stands next to you, "my father, the king, has allergies to most flowers, and I don't think anyone would like to hear him sneezing every few seconds during the ceremony." Hyunjin says. "Besides, at my castle, we have this perfect little area that we normally use to host weddings. Right mother?"
Hyunjin's mother nods. "Right, I completely forgot about that. It is true, he does have severe allergies."
She then begins to talk about the area they have at their kingdom. Meanwhile, you reach out and grab Hyunjin's hand and lean down to whisper in his ear, doing so neither your mother or Hyunjin's will see. "Thank you."
Hyunjin squeezes your hand in response, as if saying, 'You're welcome'
"Oh, that's unfortunate. Ah well, maybe it's for the best." The conversation then begins to be about what the preparations are for the wedding.
It was now after dinner, and you were on the balcony on the side of the castle, facing towards the village. The sky was dark and littered with thousands of stars and a large moon. You weren't sure why you had decided to go out there. Maybe because you needed a break from everything inside.
You look down towards the village, seeing some of the people outside on the square exchanging conversations while walking around. Smoke was coming from the chimneys of every home, and the street lights were still lit. Every little bit, you saw a carriage roll down the street towards the stables. All the people down there looked to be enjoying themselves. You envied them. They got to make their own choices, love who they want, and don't have to worry about getting their parents approval on every little thing they do.
It wasn't fair. Why did you parents have to control everything about your life? Why couldn't you live freely? If you had it your way, you and Jeongin would be living in a cabin in the woods. All alone and secluded from everyone and everything. Maybe you'd have a pet of some sorts. You'd go out with him and your pet everyday to hunt, gather wood for your fires, play in the snow during winter, go swimming in a lake during summer, play in the leaves during autumn, and have picnics in spring. You'd do anything you felt like doing. You wouldn't need anything else, just you, him, and maybe a pet.
But that was just a fantasy. Just a part of your imagination. And that's all it'd be.
A hand being placed on your shoulder breaks you from your thoughts. You look behind you to find Hyunjin. "Oh! You scared me."
Hyunjin retracts his hand. "So sorry. I did not mean to." He says, putting his hands together and giving you a bow. "I was walking around the castle and saw you out here, so I decided to join you. Is that alright?"
You nod. "Yes. I wouldn't mind some company."
Hyunjin smiles. You turn back and lean down against the railing. He moves to stand next to you. He reaches out and grips at the railing as he takes in the view in front of him. "What are you doing out here?"
You give a light shrug of your shoulders. "I felt the need to get away from my parents. This place never fails to help."
Hyunjin nods. You two sit in silence for a few moments, until you decide to ask him something that has been in your head since earlier today. "Why did you step in for me when my mother wanted to use my garden?"
Hyunjin turns towards you, even though you had not moved from your spot. "Because my father has allergies."
This time, you turn your head towards him. "You know what I mean."
Hyunjin nods. "I do." He then sighs. "I would be some sort of monster if I were to allow for you to destroy something you care so much for. No matter the reason. That place, I know it means a great deal to you."
You don't break the eye contact you hold with him. "Why would you do that for me? We hardly know each other."
This time, it's his turn to shrug. "Doesn't mean I'm supposed to let someone force you to do something so cruel as to make you destroy one of the things that brings you comfort."
You look down for a moment before turning back towards the village. "Do you think differently of me after finding out that my lover was a man?"
"No."
"Why not?" Hyunjin thinks for a moment. Why didn't he? It was a question he wanted to believe that he didn't know the answer to. But, he did. No matter how much he wanted to think otherwise, he knew the answer.
"Because I am also attracted to men as you are." His voice was in a quiet whisper. You turn your head to look at him, noticing the slight flush of his cheeks. You turn your body towards him soon after.
"How long have you known?" Hyunjin then turns towards you as well. The distance between you two seemed to have gotten smaller, by just a small little bit.
"Not very long."
"Are you ashamed of it?" The distance between you seemed to be only getting smaller slowly.
"No."
"What helped you figure it out?" Both of your voices have began to drop even quieter.
"Learning more about you."
"Learning that there are other people like you?" Both of your voices were just above a whisper now.
"Yes." You raise your hand and place it gently on the side of his face. Hyunjin leans the smallest bit into your touch. You use your other hand to tuck a stray strand of hair behind his ear before placing it on the side of his face as well.
"Do you wish to be different?"
He was breathing a bit heavier now as you stare into each others eyes, slowly leaning in. "No. . ."
You and him close your eyes as you lean down to whisper in his ear. "May I kiss you?"
Hyunjin's breath tickled against your neck as he responded. "Please. . ."
It was like a plea. Just a simple breath of air. It's all you needed before you moved and gently pressed your lips against his. He immediately kisses back, a bit unsure on what to do. It was clear he had never kissed anyone before, and you clearly had. But that didn't matter now.
He raises his hands and places them on your waist as you tilt your head to deepen the kiss.
The kiss was wonderful. A little awkward, sure, but amazing to the both of you. His lips felt like they matched perfectly with yours, like they were made for each other. Just like Jeongin's used to.
It was a slow, and meaningful kiss. One that would be remembered by the both of you. One that you both wanted to salvage, and continue for however long you could.
You part your lips slightly, and press your tongue out to lightly poke at his lips. He, hesitantly, parts them and allows for you to slip your tongue into his mouth. He isn't sure what to do, and you are able to tell. So, you try your best to show him.
You weren't the most experienced, as you have only been with one other person, but you at least knew enough to help guide him.
Your left hand slowly slides down his back until you reach his lower back as your right hand moves to hold the back of his head. You pull away from his mouth and begin to press light kisses onto the underside of his jaw and lightly trail down his neck. He tilts his head to the side to allow you more room.
"It tickles. . ." Hyunjin whispers out, his breathing heavy. You press a light kiss under his ear.
"Do you want me to stop?"
"No. Please, no." You can't help but let out a light chuckle before going back to pressing the light kisses on his neck. His hands move up to grip your shoulders lightly as your kisses begin to be a bit more open-mouthed.
When you place a bit of a more harsher kiss on a certain spot on his neck, you hear his breath hitch a bit and his grip tighten on your shoulders. Both actions aren't too noticeable unless someone were to pay very close attention. Lucky for you, you were.
However, before you could do anything else, a voice rang out, not to far from you both. "Y/N, Hyunjin, darlings. Where are you?" It was your mother.
You pull away from Hyunjin, much to both of your dismay, and take a step away from him. Both of you turn towards the railing and stare off at the, now very quiet, village. "On the balcony, mother."
It was now your wedding day, and you and your parents were riding your carriage to Hyunjin and his families kingdom. Hyunjin had left the day after you two shared your first kiss. It got boring quick without him.
That was a week ago. But, at least you would be able to see him today. In fact, you'd be seeing him a lot after today. Today was the day you both were getting married, and it was decided by both of your parents that Hyunjin would be moving in with you and your parents. Apparently, at his kingdom, the village people threatened to start an uprising if Hyunjin was to continue living there. With no other choice, they decided to send him with you.
Neither of you were too terribly upset over this, as you both enjoyed your time together; so, it was decided that after the ceremony, you both would take a carriage home together while your parents stayed at his kingdom for a few days to give you both a little sample of what ruling would be like.
The carriage ride to the other kingdom was many hours long, and seemed to only carry on more and more. You had fallen asleep for most of it before being shaken awake by your mother when you were merely minutes away.
When you had arrived at the castle, it was the middle of the day. You were met by a man by the name of Felix, and he guided you to where you were needed to be. Your parents went and sat in the front of the many rows that were already filled with people of different ages. You were then guided to a room that had your outfit awaiting in so you could change and get ready.
It doesn't take you long and by the time you finish, there's someone waiting to bring you to where you need to be. When you arrived at the place, Hyunjin wasn't there yet. When he finally did arrive, you were blown away.
Gorgeous, stunning, beautiful couldn't even begin to describe the way he looked. He wore a black overcoat that had gold swirl designs running along the collar, waistline, and front by the flaps. The undershirt was plain white and was tucked into his black trousers. The overcoat covered his neck as well. His shoes were black boots with gold laces. His hair was down and reached down to his shoulders. His crown resting atop his head, and he seemed to be wearing a small bit of gold eyeshadow?
You had to stop your jaw from dropping when you saw him. He just looked so amazing. He soon arrived in front of you, and you took the opportunity to whisper to him. "You look astonishing."
You don't miss the small blush that grows on his cheeks. "As do you."
The ceremony starts right after, and feels like it goes on for hours. It feels like relief when the priest finally announces; "I pronounce you husband and wi- uh, husband."
You share a quick peck in the lips, knowing that no one there wanted to see anymore than that, and exit the altar.
After that, you Hyunjin got into your carriage and made your way back to your castle. "You look absolutely ravishing, Hyunjin. Words cannot describe how exquisite you appear."
The man next to you smiles and looks down at his lap. You sure were a charmer. You hook your finger under his chin and bring his head up to look at you. "I am only speaking the truth."
He blushes a bit, but never stops smiling. "Thank you."
You smile in response and give his nose a little peck before letting him go and facing forward again.
The rest of the ride is met in silence. Hyunjin rests his head on your shoulder and soon falls asleep. Your head then rests on his and you follow in suite.
The carriage driver informs you when you arrive at home, and you thank him. You awake Hyunjin and help him get out of the carriage. It was dark now, and the castle seemed to glow a bit brighter then normal. You guide Hyunjin through the castle and up to where your room is. That's when you motion for him to go first. "After you."
He doesn't question it and enters into the room. When he does, however, he stops in his tracks. There were rose pedals sprinkled all over the floor, candles lit all over, and the bed seemed to be twice the size with red silk bedsheets and thick, soft comforters covered on top of it. There was also a dark red cheese-cloth curtain around it.
Hyunjin steps into the room further and you follow him, shutting the door behind you. You remove your crown and set it on it's stand before turning back to the awestruck Hyunjin. He turns around and stares at you. "Did you do this?"
You nod. "I uh, I did it before we left and I had my maids light the candles when we arrived." You scratch at the back of your neck out of nerves. "What do you think?"
The man in front of you continues to look around the room for a second before looking back at you. "You did this for me?"
You nod again. "I wasn't sure if you would like it or not."
He makes a small scoff noise. "Like it? Y/N, this is. . . amazing. I can't believe you would do something like this."
You smile a bit as Hyunjin continues to look around the room in astonishment. After a few more moments of him looking around, you begin to walk towards him. When you arrive in front of him, you hook your finger under his chin and turn his head towards you. You stare into his eyes for a few moments before leaning down and pressing your lips against his. He quickly kisses back.
This kiss was slow, and you both could tell that it held something different, this time. Both of you knew what it was. Before the kiss could get too drawn out, you pulled away and moved down to begin placing the same light kisses on his neck that you did the time before. You find the spot where you got the reaction out of him last time, and focus your attention on said spot. Only this time, you started to gently suck on the spot.
Hyunjin tilts his head as his hands move to grip at your waist. You gently drag your teeth over the area before slightly nibbling on the skin—not enough to hurt or cause any discomfort. This causes him to tighten his grip on your waist and let out a quiet whimper. "That- feels really good."
You move your hands to begin to gently run down the sides of his body and rest at his lower waist. You pull away from his neck to look him in the eye. He looks up at you, a bit of confusion written on his face. "I need to know if you want to continue this. I won't do anything you do not want me to do. If you want to stop, let me know at any time, and I will stop."
Hyunjin nods his head, understanding what you meant. "I've. . . never been with anyone before." He gulps. "In. . . anyway. I don't know what to do."
You nod. "I can show you. . . but I need to know that you want me to. Do not feel that you need to just because I want to. Okay?" Hyunjin nods again. "Do you want to continue?"
He thinks for a moment. He doesn't know why, but he feels like he can trust you. And so, he looks back up at you. "Yes. . ."
You smile at him before leaning in and connecting your lips with his. Your hands then move down and slowly push off his overcoat. The coat pools to the ground as your hands begin to unbutton his undershirt.
Hyunjin's hands move you push off your overcoat, a bit hesitant and unsure. Once you finish unbuttoning his shirt, you pull it out from where it was tucked into his trousers and push it off his arms. Your hands then move to run down his back lightly, causing him to tense up. You pull away to look him in the eye. "Everything alright?"
He looks down at the ground. It was only then that you look down at his torso and notice that he had a few scars littered on his chest, and probably more on his back. Most of them were faded, probably a few years old, but some looked to be a slight pink-ish colour, like they were recent. You run your hand down the front of his chest, the action being a soft and slow motion. "Your body causes you shame." Hyunjin nods very slightly. "You do not need to feel that way. A few marks do not make you weak, nor does it make you any less beautiful. Beauty is in the soul, not on the body."
You place your hand on the side of his face, gently lifting it so he looks you in the eye. "Remember that."
He nods, looking up into your eyes. "Thank you."
You give him a light kiss on his lips before pulling away and locking eyes with him again. You then push off your shirt to reveal your torso to him. "You have no need to feel shame. Everyone has their own scars—whether they are visible to the world or not." You move your hand to run along one of the scars that rests on your stomach. "Scars is what makes us human."
Hyunjin looks up at you with curiosity and admiration in his eyes. You seemed so wise to him, it was odd, but it somehow comforted him. You weren't going to judge him for the way his body is. In fact, you weren't going to judge him for really anything.
He leans into the hand you have resting on his face, giving you a soft smile. He raises his hand and places it on the back of the one on his face. You give him a small grin in response before leaning down and connecting your lips with his again.
Your hands move down to slide down his back, lightly dragging your fingernails along and causing goosebumps to rise on his skin. His hands move down and rest on your lower waist.
When your hands reach his lower back, your move to the front and your fingers move to slowly begin to undo his trousers. Once they are undone, you push them down below his hip and he pushes them off the rest of the way. He kicks them to the side and moves his hands to rest on your shoulders. You then hook your fingers into the waistband of his undergarments and lightly push them off his waist so they pool on the floor. You wrap your hand around his cock, giving a gentle stroke and causing Hyunjin to pull away, keeping his eyes closed, and tightening his grip on your shoulders. "Does it feel good?"
"Yes. . ." He is quick to respond, his head slowly falling back as you give another stroke. A quiet and breathy groan falls from his lips. You give one more stroke before pulling away. He looks back at you, breath heavy.
"Lay down on the bed." You say. "Make yourself as comfortable as you can."
He does as you say, moving to go and lay on his back, his legs folded up so his knees are in the air while his feet rest on the bed. He closes his eyes as he hears you begin working on removing the bottom part of your clothing. To say he was nervous was an understatement. He was terrified. Is this going to hurt? How is this supposed to work? He knew how men and women had intercourse, but. . . how do two men do it? He was about to find out.
Hyunjin feels the bed shift ad you climbed onto the bed. He opens his eyes to look up at you as you hover over him now. He gulps a bit, letting out a breath. "How will this work?"
"It's. . . difficult to explain. It will seem odd, and it will be uncomfortable at the beginning, but it won't hurt. I know you're scared, but you don't need to be. I will take care of you, and remember; if you ever want to stop, tell me and I will. Tell me to slow down, and I will." He nods. "Do you trust me?"
It was a question he had to think about. You were the most kindest person Hyunjin had ever met in his life, and you had only proven yourself to be trustworthy. There really was no reason to not trust you. Besides, all he needed to say is 'stop' or 'slow down' and you would. So, he looks up at you and gives you a nod.
You lean down and press a kiss onto his lips. You then begin to push yourself into him, going as slowly as you can. Hyunjin squeezes his eyes shut and begins to tense up at the feeling. You reach up to where one of his hands rests and interlock your fingers with his. "Relax. It'll feel much better if you relax. Squeeze my hand as hard as you want to help."
He nods, trying his best to relax. He squeezes your hand tightly as you finally bottom out. It was severely uncomfortable, but it was slowly getting better, until eventually, it started to feel a bit good. "You can move. Go slowly, please."
You nod, leaning down and beginning to trail kisses from his neck as you slowly move to pull yourself almost all the way out before pushing yourself back in. Hyunjin lets out a quiet groan, like it's a breath of air. "It-It feels so good. . ."
You hum in response as you trail your kisses down from his neck, and onto his chest. When your lips wrap around his nipple and you flick your tongue over it, he sucks in a sharp breath and throws his head back. This was the best feeling Hyunjin has ever experienced. He has touched himself before, but this was nothing close to the feeling of that. "Faster. . . please. . ."
You speed up just a small bit, enough to please him. You gently rake your teeth over his nipple, causing him to arch his back and let out a small moan. Your free hand moves up to flick over his other nipple, making sure to give attention to both. This causes him to let out a quiet whine.
It was a wonder how you knew so much after being with only one other person. It seemed like you had some sort of magic ability. Whatever it was, Hyunjin was incredibly grateful. You made him feel the best he's ever felt before, both emotionally and physically. He never thought he would ever be able to feel as good as he does now, and he doesn't want it to change in the slightest bit. But it was only about to get better.
He felt as if there was a heavy stone in his lower stomach. Or like some sort of knot that only got tighter with each thrust of your hips and every flick of your fingers and tongue. What was this? Why did it feel this way? He did not know, but he enjoyed it so much to complain. With a few more flicks and thrusts, he feels like the knot break and a wave of pleasure comes over him. He clenches around you, causing for you to gain a wave of pleasure as well. Hyunjin lets out a long string of whines as the pleasure causes for his mind to go fuzzy.
His thighs tense and untense as he feels his cock spill out onto his stomach. He tries to close his legs, only to be held open by your body. His breath becomes ragged as his high slowly fades, as does yours.
You stay in the position you were in as you both try to catch your breath. Hyunjin whispers something quietly. "Thank you."
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