#i’m only fucking human

[girl4music]

So I’ve just watched ‘I Will Remember You’ for the very first time. Oh boy… where do I even fucking start?

I thought I would never have to endure Bangel in this show at any point. But there was Bangel alright… Bangel and all of what that tragic dynamic entails. I really shouldn’t be surprised since I’m sure a Buffy/Angel crossover was highly anticipated at the time. But almost every issue I have with them was pretty much supersized to the max. I don’t even know where to begin in trying to explain all of what I want to say.

Let’s start with the one-sided decision making because that’s the thing that’s bothering me the most right now. Couples in a loving relationship full of trust and respect and maturity do not make decisions for their partner without consulting their partner. Doesn’t matter what the reason or circumstance is - full awareness and informed decision from both partners is required before any decision making that affects the both of them and their relationship happens.

Cue my Angel/Willow parallels: *after wiping her memories of fighting so that they wouldn’t fight* (actually this a very similar situation. Ugh. Least the sex is consensual this time. This is a plus I guess.)

WILLOW: “I just wanted to make things better. Better for us.”

TARA: “But you don’t get to decide what is better for us, Will. We’re in a relationship. We’re supposed to decide together.”

Angel made 2 - TWO - major decisions in this episode without informing Buffy. Without talking to her once, without even leaving her notice that he would be okay or why he wasn’t in bed when she woke up yet again!

He told Cordelia and Doyle. But he never told Buffy. Madness. And the fact he claims it’s out of love and that she is important to him why he didn’t do it. It may just be the woman in me talking that’s feeling sympathy for Buffy but this dude truly is infuriating.

“How can we be together if the cost is your life, or the lives of others?”

HELLO … that’s every fucking day! You both will eventually die and so will the rest of the world. This idiot is so consumed by his self-sabotaging guilt that he can’t even see for one second how that is such flawed logic. He was human and he was happy. She was still the Slayer but she is human and happy. I mean what the fuck? And excuse me…, but why is it he is the only one who was allowed to remember it? Framing it as some kind of self-sacrificial heroics when it really was just plain stupid and selfish. There wasn’t even a guarantee anything would go wrong. There was just a chance it might. Which it would anyway. And he took that as fact like the impulsive act-and-ask-questions-later brooding sad boy he is.

I understand the risk but the risk doesn’t outweigh the reality because the risk will always be there regardless of what they do or don’t do together. I wanted to root for them now that Buffy is an adult but it’s evident Angel just isn’t good for Buffy either as a human or vampire just because he says and believes it. In much the same way as Buffy does not allow herself love or happiness or normality or forgiveness in her own show, neither does he in his own show.

I don’t know if I’m articulating any of this well. I’m just so fucking frustrated by what I’ve just watched. I’m just venting my emotions on it at the moment. My perspective might be subject to change once I’ve got passed the emotional stage and processed my thoughts and got full information on the details.

The rest is just too much for me to analyze right now. Why put me through that? That was bloody painful! They could have had a life of happiness and freedom and humanity together. An actual future with each other. And he chose to full speed reverse out of it without a word to his girlfriend he loves oh so much.

[noknowshame]

why is religious Christmas imagery all so joyful and pleasant? where is the inherent horror of the birth of Christ? A mother is handed her newborn child, wailing and innocent. Her hands come away sticky. Red. Simply by giving her son life she has already killed him. He is doomed from the beginning. Her love will not save him from suffering. Because the thing cradled in her arms is not a baby, it is a sacrifice: born amongst the other bleating animals whose blood will one day be spilled in the name of what demands it. the night is silent with anticipation. Mary, did you know? That your womb was also a grave?

[scooterscoob]

a man and his bestie

[they just killed a man]

[onceandfutureheartache]

it’s just. it’s HIM okay??? i just- (*clenches fist*)

[crippled-peeper]

it’s literally so funny how whenever I talk about my cis ablebodied friend the biggest saddest fucking losers alive on this site start sending me hate anons like “so you literally love cis men more then trans women? wow disgusting” with absolutely 0 self awareness

[lovelesslittleloser]

Alien: what are human’s instinctive reactions to danger?

Human 1: fight or flight!

Human 2, deadpan: run, hit, talk shit

Alien:

[manitapaleta]

ep 26 doodle page tag ur fav moment mine was “roll for ethnicity”

[emotinalsupportturtle]

Crowley came up with this, Crowley came up with that, whatever… Crowley and Aziraphale came up with biodegradable paper straws together.

[godblooded]

just an fyi, and it feels like it needs to be said here: your blog is your own space and you should be able to say whatever the fuck you want. if you’re sad? vent. get sad. maybe put it under a cut, definitely tag it, but get sad. if you feel like you need someone to talk to? drop a freaking message about how you’re feeling like you could use a buddy, or anything randomly engaging. if you’re having a hard time, you should feel safe and okay to talk about it in your own space. we’re writers and we’re people and while there’s a lot to be said for how engagement outside of oneself is necessary in rp (and really really needs to improve), i think there’s a lot that must be said about people reaching out to others. it’s become so solitary here — the whole ‘reblog from source’ thing when it comes to shit like about and musings is absurd. the whole refusing to like things is ridiculous. yes, curate your space, that’s important, but curating your space into a studio apartment only you live in doesn’t make this a community anymore, it makes it a studio apartment you live in.

just be yourself here. do whatever you want. but i’m always saying: remember you’re not alone, and don’t let yourself feel that way.

[lornasaurusrex]

I miss you Lorna… this is such a mess

This is an old message and I had several other similar messages, but I miss you guys and hope you’re all doing well!! I’m sorry to see nothing has improved.

I saw I was kindly mentioned by @awesomefringey and some other commenters the other day, so just wanted to log in and say hello and log back out for a few more months. 💕

Sending so so much love to all of you. Take care of yourselves and each other, please.

The video is still on YT.

[veganymph]

at a certain point some people need to realise it’s not enough. they need to realise that they should feel some slight guilt for how much useless things they consume or how much plastic they throw out or how much meat or dairy they eat. at a point you have to look in the mirror and actually ask yourself if it’s necessary. capitalism is an evil system that thrives off of your human condition to feel guilt for your actions. it wants you to feel like the problem. however, that doesn’t execute individual responsibility. that doesn’t mean you don’t have to try. you are responsible for your actions and frankly if you don’t feel a bit bad about wasting money on something harmful, that’s concerning. you don’t get to say ‘no ethical consumption under capitalism’ and then do exactly what capitalism wants you to do. you should feel bad for unnecessarily consuming unethical products because you have a responsibility to be kind to others, not because you’re responsible for climate change and so on. you have a duty to give a fuck about others

[stuckinapril]

I think I realized how severely humor infects all spaces when I witnessed two of my coworkers at the neuro clinic I’m interning at laughing at putting in a patient as deceased

[vampiresfromxenon]

I’m so unsure of how I’m supposed to go on living my normal day when all I can think about is my baby girl. My girlfriend. LOOOOOOKKKK

the soft looks he gives Tav makes my heart melt, how fucking dare he /pos

[starlystudios]

I haven’t done Star Wars in a fair bit so,,, I have returned, I guess. Have my favourite trash grandpa.

Was originally gonna draw a biblically (canonically) accurate outfit, but then I was upset at the lack of contrast to see his clothes properly and it all spiralled down from there – so have him with a bit of a lightning motif and more silver

[oneknightlight]

The biggest lie they tell you when you’re growing up is that in order to be an “adult” you have to abandon every single childlike habit you have and that’s such bullshit

If having your favorite stuffie in your lap and wearing pajamas while you put together a book shelf helps you get it done, that doesn’t make the fact that you built a big ass shelf any less adult. The shelf isn’t not a shelf. It just means you made the task enjoyable and didn’t force yourself to be uncomfortable for no good reason.

[mymitochondriaforpresident]

Excuse me???????????????????????