#i'll probably make a day of this tmr

[jigenshat]

anons are back on .......for now

[kuiinncedes]

nvfhjjgdkf

[bingbongsupremacy]

The Letter Pt. 2

Pairing: Ellie Williams x fem! reader

Warnings: She/Her pronouns used, Homophobia

Summary: Ellie and Y/N are in two very different social groups at school. One day when Y/N's crush is cruelly exposed in front of the whole school, Y/N is brutally shot down. Finally, four years later the two run into each other again.

(I changed it to four years so reader could go to college)

High School AU

Next part will probably be the last part. I'll probably upload it tmr.

Pt. 1 Pt. 2 Pt. 3

*Not Proof Read* TLOU Masterlist

*****

Ever since the assembly my life turned into hell. Ellie dropped me as a tutor and I was placed with some random guy who constantly reminded me of what happened. Kids snickered in the halls. Certain teachers would shoot me looks of disapproval. Kids I've never talked to stuffed church pamphlets into my locker or invited me to church.

It went on for the last few months of my senior year. Whenever any major event took place, Vivian was sure to point me out in the bleachers and remind everyone what happened.

It got to the point where I stopped going to assembly's

At least I had Dina and Jesse. They stood by me through it all. I don't know what would've happened without them.

Whenever I saw Ellie in the halls I dodged her. If I didn't, she'd clearly talk about me to her friends who'd snicker and agree.

That stupid fucking letter made my life hell.

-----Five Years Later-----

My car beeps as I lock it. I glance up at the familiar bright sign before quickly making my way into the supermarket.

Things have changed.

With one look around I can already tell they remodeled the place. I have no idea where any of the shit Dina sent me to get is.

I guess that's what I get for staying away so long. I honestly didn't plan on coming back but I miss Dina and Jesse. I fell horrible staying away all these years.

The store is mostly empty. I mean, who the fuck wants to be out at 11 o'clock at night.

I look around for one of the workers. There has to be someone here.

A small laugh catches my attention.

A long strip of smoke floats up into the air. As I walk closer to the register I start to notice a smell: weed.

" Um, hey. Can you help me? " I ask, peeking over the side of the register.

A head jumps up in surprise, bumping against the top of the checkout stand. " Fuck. " They mutter in surprise, rubbing their would with the hand not holding the joint.

" Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. "

The woman shakes her head, shoving her phone into her back pocket. She snuffs the joint out. " It's fine. " She reassures me, not looking up. " Just don't call my boss, yeah? Fuck, I can't get another write up. Fucking Kaylee with have my ass. " She mutters.

I smile at her disheveled appearance. She obviously wasn't planning on anyone coming in. " Chill, I'm not a rat. I don't care what you do. I just need some help finding some stuff. It's been a while since I've been here. " I hand her the list.

I glance over her hunched form. She nods. Her hair is messily pulled back into a half up bun. A light green vest covers some band tee.

I glance down at the the register.

My heart stops.

" Ellie? "

The womans' head snaps up in confusion. The confusion soon spreads to surprise. " Y-Y/N? Fuck, is that you? " Her poster straightens and her grip on my list becomes visibly tighter.

Ellie's face looks much more tired then in high school. She looks much more mature.

My emotions hit me like a brick wall. Every angry and sad feeling I went through senior year comes tumbling back. Every mocking sentence and rude word hits me like a ton of bricks. It feels like I'm going through it again.

At the same time seeing her activates the old crush I had. While my heart feels like it's being torn to shreds, my stomach does summer saults.

My jaw tightens and I reach for the paper. " I don't need your help. " I mutter. I'll be damned if I let her into my life again. Even if it's just for a few minutes. " I'll go to another store. "

Ellie steps back, holding my paper away. With a head shake, she responds. " What other store? It's fucking Jackson. We're the only store here. "

She's right. We both know it.

" Then...then I'll just get it myself. Give me my fucking list. " I hold out my hand.

" Can we please talk. " Ellie's brows are furrowed. " I- "

I roll my eyes. " I have no interest in talking to you, Williams. " I snap. " Fine, I'll fucking find everything without it. " I begin walking away.

" Fine! " Ellie's voice trails after me. " Look, you don't have to talk to me. "

Fuck, what the hell did I put on that list? Why the hell did I give it to her? Fuck fuck fuck.

I think I'm supposed to get mayo? Wait no. Why the fuck would I need Mayo?

" All you have to do is listen. Please, Y/N. I know I don't fucking deserve it after what I put you through-what I did, but please. Just give me a few minutes of your time. " Ellie begs.

I turn to the girl. She doesn't look like the confident girl I knew years ago. She looks...regretful?

I sigh. " Fine. You have three minutes. "

A small smile of relief flashes across Ellie's features. " Fuck, thank you. "

I nod stiffly, crossing my arms across my body.

" I was a fucking asshole in high school. " Ellie swallows. " I let my friends dictate the way I acted. All I wanted was to be popular. During Freshman year, I got bullied so I started playing a bunch of sports. I befriended a bunch of jocks and eventually a bunch of other assholes who hung around them. I became one of them. I was so fucking scared of losing my place in the group. " Ellie blushes slightly. She glances up at the ceiling, obviously not proud of what she's telling me.

" Anyways, I did a bunch of fucked up shit to stay with them. What I did to you was by far the fucking worst. " Her green eyes meet mine. " And I'm so fucking sorry. I really am. The day of the assembly Vivian came into the room and took your letter out of your sketch book. She didn't tell me what was in it. I knew it was fucked up whatever she was planning, but I didn't think it'd be that bad. I thought she'd just...I don't know...Show a not so great picture you drew off to the school-which is still a dick move-but I didn't know what she was planning. " Ellie nervously wrings her wrist.

" I'm so fucking sorry, Y/N. I was so cruel to you. So fucking mean. " Ellie looks up at me. " I knew what I was doing was wrong and I still did it. I could've said something to help but I-I didn't. I was a fucking coward and I'm so sorry. I think about it all the time. What if I was you? What if it had been me? What if I had been outed in front of the school? What if people treated me the way they had treated you? What if I treated me the way I treated you? I was so scared people would find out I'm gay. I wasn't ready for people to know. I guess...I guess I thought that if the attention was on you, I could continue sneaking around without people finding out. I can't hide forever though, Y/N. And these past few years I've realized just how bad you had it. I'm so sorry. I don't know if you can ever forgive me, but I understand if you can't. Honestly, if I were you, I fucking wouldn't. " Ellie's face is red from embarrassment and shame.

She was scared. She was scared of what people would think if they knew she was gay.

" I was scared, Ellie. I was so fucking scared. I didn't want anyone to know either. I never planned on giving you that note. It was a stupid crush. Even though I was scared, I never would've done that shit to you. I never would've talked shit about you in front of my friends or mocked you in public or at games. " I'm so torn. I don't know how I feel.

Ellie nods, closing her eyes. " Fuck, I'm sorry. "

" I don't hate you Ellie. "

" You don't? " Ellie's voice is surprised.

I shake my head. " No. I just don't know if I can trust you. You hurt me so much. "

Ellie thinks for a moment. " Maybe there's a way I can make it up to you. "

I cock my head to the side, slightly skeptical. " How? "

" How long are you in Jackson? " Ellie leans against a shelf.

" About a week, why? " I'm supposed to be hanging out with Dina and Jesse all week.

" Perfect. Give me five days. I promise, I'll fix what I fucked up. If I can't, you never have to talk to me or see me again. I swear to god I will never talk to you again if you want. Just give me a week. " Ellie's gaze is unmoving, much more confident then moments ago.

Should I trust her? What if she does something? Well she did just bare her fucking soul to me.

With a sigh I reply. " Fine. I'll give you a week. "

Tag list: Idk if I missed anyone. Sorry if I did. Lmk if I did or if u want to be tagged in the next part.

@octavias-next-meat-bite @ximtiredx

[petrichor-idyllic]

aaaa this might be a really lame request, but would it be possible for a minho x reader where she splits up with him when brenda and thomas go back and instead of brenda getting bitten by a crank it was the reader (maybe she got bitten saving brenda) and how he reacts to seeing her get ill / recover? 🥲 seeing an active tmr blog the delivers such good content in 2023 actually made me gasp so like even if you don’t write this, i will be actively reading anything you write!

Oooo I actually really like this idea, of course I'll write it :))

Also I appreciate your continued support, you guys are the best.

Inaccurate dialogue to the films because I'm too busy to watch the movies for reference, but you get the jist.

IN ADVANCE OF GRIEF

MASTERLIST | MINHO MASTERLIST

SUMMARY: See above. Fem! Reader x Minho. Movie based fic. You came up with Teresa.

WARNINGS: Inappropriate language, you nearly die (again)(there's becoming a theme with my Minho fics)(I'm really putting this man through it), the Flare works differently in the movie vers. and all we get are the visual symptoms so I'm making this shit up, WICKED being WCKD because movie.

This wasn't meant to happen.

You just went after Thomas when he ran after Brenda - you couldn't leave him alone with a stranger.

And look where your kindness has gotten you. Biten by a Crank.

You're not really sure how it happened, but when that psycho tried to attack Brenda, you were the one to dive to her rescue. It's a blur, but once that glass broke and Thomas managed to catch Brenda, and you narrowly avoided death- you didn't even notice the pain in your leg.

It's fine.

It's no big deal.

You're probably immune.

You were in the Maze, after all.

The memories of waking up with an unconscious Teresa next to you are only from a few days ago, but now it feels like an eternity.

Though, you thought you were all immune. And look what happened to Winston.

You managed to hide it from your companions, only checking the injury when they weren't looking. But Brenda seemed to catch onto something not being quite right.

You lose Thomas and Brenda in the daze of a party you accidentally got dragged into, though you're pretty sure you see them kiss, (and Brenda get rejected,) before your body hits the floor.

"Rise and shine, shank," Minho gently pushes you awake as your eyes flicker up to meet his. He smiles at you.

Minho.

Minho.

You don't really know when your feelings for him started, especially since you don't think you've ever actually stood still. But whilst Teresa was unconscious and you were having some kind of mental breakdown, Minho made time to make sure you were alright - even with his ventures into the Maze.

Newt had his hands full running the place with Alby out of commission and Gally was throwing a paddy because Thomas had achieved the impossible. So, Minho and the Medjacks were the only ones around to keep you sane.

Maybe if you arrived at a different point, things would be different.

But they're not.

Thomas and Brenda are already awake. Brenda is sitting in a chair, looking forlorn and anxiously glancing at you. Thomas is talking to Teresa, which is also a bitter sight for Brenda.

"What happened?" You grumble, pushing yourself up on your elbows. You've been lying on a pile of cushions on the floor.

"You got wasted at some Crank party, passed out - the klunk you took was stronger than Gally's special brew," he snickers, offering you a hand to pull yourself up. Your eyes flicker up to his face and you smile.

He yanks you up and you stumble slightly. "Woah, easy, girly," he chuckles, placing his hand on the small of your back, stabilising you.

Your head feels foggy from the drugs, but your main concern is the throbbing sensation in your ankle. It stings and pulses, like something is living under your skin.

Minho notices your hesitance as your stomach drops.

You're not immune.

If you were, your whole leg would feel like it's covered in cobwebs and on fire.

Shit. What do you do now?

You don't want to worry your friends, they have enough on their plate. And maybe your body will take more time to fight the infection. Maybe it's too soon to tell.

You're lying to yourself, but it's all you can do.

"Hey, you feeling okay?" You force yourself to smile at him.

"Yeah, yeah, just a bit shucked up - where are we?" You look around the room as Minho lets go of you. There's a man tied to a chair in the middle of the room as Jorge yells at him.

"We found Marcus," Minho says simply.

"That's Marcus?" You and Thomas say in unison.

It's the same guy that spiked you earlier.

You step forward, a jolt of pain slicing you in two, making your leg twist awkwardly and your stomach flip.

"Shuck-! Christ, (Y/N)," Minho jumps to catch you before you manage to catch yourself. "Are you sure you're good?"

"Y-yeah," you try to push out a chuckle, but it comes out as pained. "Think I twisted my ankle before - nothin' I can't handle."

Minho looks unsure, his eyes flickering to your leg and then back up to your face. He can't show how much he cares.

How much he wants to say fuck this and just figure out a way to survive in the Scorch with you. You were gone for one night and now something's wrong - he knows it's wrong but he can't quite put his finger on what.

He's tired of fighting, of running, of everything.

But he figured things would be alright because he had you now.

Brenda moves to let you sit down in the armchair. She's seen it before, and if it were her in your situation, she wouldn't want everyone knowing either. And you proceed to completely zone out.

Too many thoughts swarm your head. Minho. The Flare. The state of your immunity. Who this guy is and how the fuck you're going to actually find the Right Arm.

That's a lot of ground to cover.

So, obviously, you steal a car. Marcus' car, to be more precise.

Bastard deserved it.

You all squeeze in the car, and you're stuck between Minho and Aris. Normally, being this close to Minho would send your brain foggy and have you blushing, but your body is literally rotting from the inside out.

The sickness set in pretty early into the car ride. Then the sweating and fever followed. You're struggling to keep your head up, which is less than ideal when you're trying to act completely normal.

But at least you're not walking.

So, you're less than pleased when you have to stop due to a pile of cars in the road.

You try your best to keep going, but everything everyone's saying is like static in your ears. Everything hurts, and it's a good thing Minho is paying attention when the gunshots start.

He yanks you behind a car with him and Newt - and he's not the only one noticing your state as Newt looks at you.

"What's wrong with her?" Newt asks, like you're not even there despite the current circumstances of being shot at.

"I don't know." Minho says bluntly, eyes scanning you as you lean back against the vehicle.

"You don't think-"

"Slim it, Newt," Minho snaps, "I don't wanna think."

"I'm fine," you say, adjusting yourself. "Just shucked up my ankle, that's all."

"Come on, get up! Up!" You jump out of your skin at the voices of two girls breaking your static state.

Who apparently knows Aris.

Small world, I guess.

Sonya and Harriet lead you through the mountains, shoving you into another set of vehicles and leading you to the Right Arm base camp.

By this point, the world is a blur and direction doesn't matter to you. You're just absent mindedly stumbling in the direction of sound and blurred images of your friends.

You hear Minho say something, touching your wrist but you yank yourself away as it feels like you've been burnt.

Harriet and Sonya introduce you to Vince, whose name you don't even catch.

He gives some speech about checking for infection and how he doesn't trust you all.

And that's when your body caves in and you hit the floor.

"Shit! (Y/N)!" Minho snaps, diving forward to catch you. His knees hit the floor, pulling your upper half onto his lap. He moves strands of hair out of your face - your eyes are sunken, and your face is sweaty, your eyes involuntarily rolling back into their sockets repeatedly as you desperately try to regain soke kind of control.

His heart sinks into his stomach. He knew. He knew something was wrong, and he just let it slide because you said so. And now look at you, crumpled on the floor, unable to breathe. You're seriously ill, and he did nothing to help.

"What's wrong with her?" Vince asks as the Gladers swarm you.

"What's wrong?" Frypan asks. "Minho? What happened?"

"I-I, I don't know," Minho stutters out, "I don't know."

The Gladers repeat your name and the world spirals around you. You look up at the boy who's cradling you.

This is it. This is how you die.

Minho's looking at someone else, his blurred face trying to make sense of everything. You reach out, your fingers brushing against his face - which is easier said than done with the awkward angle and your weak arms.

"Thanks, Minho," you whisper as he looks down at you. "You were always my favourite."

"Shit!" Vince snaps, making Minho jump out of his skin. Vince has moved the piece of cloth from your ankle, revealing the bite in your leg. "She's infected!"

The crowd swarms away as Vince pulls a gun out. Minho tries to shield you, shouting something you can't make out.

He's yanked away by some Right Arm members, fanatically trying to break free.

The Gladers, along with Brenda and Jorge beg for your life.

"Please," Thomas begs, "we can do something- can't you help her?"

"Yeah, I can put her out of her misery," Vince points the gun at your dying body.

"No!" Minho screeches. "Don't! Please! Don't!"

"Stop!" An unfamiliar voice says. "Let him go! Now. What's going on here?"

A woman, Mary, walks over, forcing the men to let Minho free.

"She's infected - we can't help her." Vince explains.

"No, but he can," she smiles at the boy, "hello, Thomas."

Everyone is left confused, but Minho is too busy on the floor by your body again.

Mary explains how she knows Thomas, and that he can make you better again, even just for a little while.

"Get your girlfriend up," she says to Minho, "come on, we'll help her."

"She's not my girlfriend," Minho huffs, slipping his arms under yours and pulling you up, before picking you up bridle style.

Mary looks at him, smirking. "Are you sure?"

He looks at Thomas who simply shrugs.

They follow Mary into the medical tent, Minho lays you on the bed, taking a seat on the far side as he gently plays with your hand. She sets up her equipment and takes blood from Thomas.

"Minho's also from the Maze - couldn't you take his blood?" The boy asks.

Mary sighs. "Well, I'm sure you know by now that not everyone from the Mazes was immune. And I don't know the status of your friends. But I know you are because we used to work closely. Minho's blood might work, but I'm not willing to risk waiting."

It makes sense, and Minho doesn't care about that.

She injects your arm with the serum. She rubs Minho's shoulder. "She should be awake soon. We'll leave you be." She gives him a reassuring smile. "Come on, Thomas. Let's give them some space."

She walks out the tent, but Thomas lingers for a second.

"Did you know?" Minho asks. "Did you know she got bit?"

Thomas simply shakes his head. "No, but I think Brenda did. She didn't seem as shocked." Minho doesn't bother looking at his friend, he just stares at you. "She's gonna be alright, yanno."

"Yeah, but for how long? It doesn't last forever." (Little does he know)

Thomas settles into a silence before sucking in a deep breath. "You love her."

"What?" Minho snaps to finally look at his friend.

"You love her, don't you?"

Minho's jaw tightens, his eyelids fluttering. He opens his mouth to speak, but nothing comes out, so he rubs his face with his hands instead.

"You love Teresa," Minho retorts, taking the pressure off himself.

Thomas scoffs. "Yeah - but at least I can admit it."

Minho presses his lips into a thin line. He doesn't exactly like being called out like that.

Thomas exits the tent, leaving him with you.

He looks at you. "He's right, yanno," he mumbles to himself. "I do shuckin' love you. How shucked is that? I've known you for less than a week, and I..." He trails off, not really sure how to put it into words, even just to himself.

So, instead, he leans forward, placing a kiss to your forehead.

Though, he did not expect your eyes to be open when he pulled back. Your eyes flutter, looking up at him. You smile.

"Hi."

"Hey," he chuckles, sitting back in his seat. "You scared the klunk outta me, yanno that?"

"I didn't mean to." You groan, trying to sit up. Your body still feels messed up and groggy, but it's still a massive relief.

"Woah, hey," he shakes his head, pushing you back down. "Take it easy, shank. You nearly died today."

"Yeah, well, it's not like that's anything new."

He glares at you, and you chuckle.

"What did you mean earlier?" He asks after a brief pause.

"Hm?"

"You said I was your favourite," you cringe at that detail. "And you said thank you. For what?"

"For everything," you respond simply. "You looked out for me, so..."

"That wasn't anything special."

"It was to me."

You turn on your side, resting on your arm as you look at him. There's something behind Minho's expression that you can't quite read as be stares at you. It fades as quickly as it came though when he resorts back to his sarcastic ways.

"So, am I really your favourite? Because you seem to like Frypan's food a bit too much."

"What? Fry's cooking is good - you shanks just act too high-and-mighty to appreciate his hard work." Minho fiegns offence, dramatically gasping and putting his hand to his chest.

"Hm, I don't know, there's definitely some favouritism going on there-"

"Slim it," you snort, before dropping your gaze and suddenly becoming serious. "You're my favourite, Minho. You always have been."

He struggles to fight the smirk that crosses his face. "But, I guess I'm yours too, eh?" You grin. "Since you love me, and all."

Minho freezes completely, his face dropping. He blankly stares at you for a good few seconds.

"Ah, shuck," you burst out laughing as his face turns red, his hands coming to cover himself and his embarrassment. "So, you heard me..?"

"Yep, I heard."

"Right, yep, cool - shucking brilliant."

You smile. You've just had a near death experience, so an accidental love confession really isn't fazing you at all. Sitting up, it hurts but you don't care as you throw your legs over the side so you're sitting directly in front of him.

You pull his hands away from his face, taking them in your own. His eyes meet yours and you smile at him. Leaning in, you kiss him on the cheek.

"I love you, too," you mutter, almost into him as you only pull away a bit. He scoffs, and it looks like he's about to say something but his words fail him.

So, he decides to do something else instead. He presses his lips to yours and you immediately kiss him back.

It's short and sweet, and you're both smiling as you part.

"I'm so relieved you're okay," he mumbles.

"I'm always gonna be okay," you kiss the tip of his nose. "I've got you looking after me."

Another cute piece for my main boy.

Requests might be lacking for a bit since I'm away for the next few days but I'm gonna see what I can do.

I hope you enjoyed :))

[shinsou-rii]

HE GETS ME SO HIGH - lee heeseung

summary! it was hard being with heeseung, especially when no one was allowed to know about it. it was even harder to realise that really you didn’t mean as much to heeseung as you thought you did, and it was just embarrassing to know that he had you completely hooked with there being nothing you could do about it.

warnings! toxic!heeseung + probably over use of commas, not completely proof read - let me know if there’s any mistakes

authors note! first and longest fic of the series, i think this one might be my fave? :) for jays tmr i'm actually out during the day so i'll either edit it today + schedule for post tmr or it will be out a little later than intended dependant on what time i get back <3

Hanging out with Lee Heeseung and his friends was said to be a dream come true for many, the seven boys were loved throughout the entirety of the school. Teachers and students alike all had a soft spot for the boys - whether they admitted it or not was a different question. They were all just so charming in their own different ways it was hard not to and really, you were no different.

Well, maybe there was a slight difference between you and the rest.

Lee Heeseung. 

It had all started when he approached you one day, claiming he wanted to hang out so that he could ‘get to know you better’, if you knew it was going to end like this you would have never agreed that day.

The days you spent with Heeseung were fun, they consisted of quite literally everything and nothing. Some days you would go out with the boys and do whatever came to mind at the time and other days you would just spend time with him at his house, watching movies, taking naps, playing games, anything along those lines really. 

You weren’t really sure what it was about heeseung that really drew you in, was it the way he smiled so softly at you? Or was it the way he always made you feel as though you were floating whenever he looked at you? Whatever it was, it was addicting.

The only problem was, apart from his six friends, nobody knew that you and him were close. 

He refused to even acknowledge your presence during schooling hours. During the day if you even tried to look in his direction to catch his eye, the boy already had his back facing you. He made it quite literally impossible for you to get close to him at school, to ensure that nobody knew about the two of you.

You couldn’t even tell your friends about the time you spent with him, with the way he avoids you like the plague there’s not even a single chance that they would ever believe what you had to say.

It was almost comedical how every single time you brought this up to him, heeseung would shut it down straight away with a simple, ‘don’t worry baby, you know you’re my closest friend’ and just carry on with whatever he was doing prior. You knew it was a lie, you knew it was too good to be true, so why every single time did you nod your head with a big grin on your face and leave him be? Why did you let it slide, knowing fully that later on when you’re alone in your room, you were going to sob, realising he doesn’t care about you the way you thought he did?

Your cries weren’t going to change the fact that Lee Heeseung was a pain in your neck when it came to everything apart from the time you spent together. Every time he ignored you it really was like a punch in the gut - he may as well just physically kick you in your side, maybe that would hurt less.

But even so, he was always on your mind. There was no way to explain why this boy was always up there, his name always in your head. Just seeing him could make your mind go blank, only thinking thoughts of him. It was enough to make you zone out whenever he got too into your head.

You needed a break from him, and so you took one. 

“Are you okay?” he had asked when you were laying with him on his bed, just staring up at the ceiling, thinking about how you had even ended up here in the first place as he traced shapes on your arms. “No, I think I'll just come back when I need to see you again, okay?” you had said as you got up and started to collect your bag, “ y/n, you should just pretend everything is fine.”

You sighed as you turned to face him, “I need to know that I actually want you, Heeseung.” 

“You know i’m right, y/n” and he was. You should just pretend everything is fine. It’s not like it would make a difference, he had you hooked on him from the start and you didn’t even realise.

He would never leave your mind, and you still didn’t know why. You didn’t know what it was about him, and you never would. Him as a whole was addictive. He was right, you should just pretend because you know, and he knows, that you would always go back to him. 

The crush you had on him was addicting, even if you couldn’t quite understand it. You just get so high off of him.

taglist @wanna-live-yn-life @hoonieeverse

[thestarinstarving]

gained 1.6 lbs since yesterday 😭 that's what i get for binging. i haven't pooped yet today so im hoping that it all comes out one way or another

fasting today to make up for it. planned for 24 hours but if i feel okay tmr i might do 48, tho im kinda worried bc i have dance both today and tomorrow which i do need energy for. i'll try and water fast but i'll probably chug a monster so i can do my hw 😭 ill stay under 20 cals on liquids if i drink anything else

off to take a walk, i wanna be at least 500 cals in the negatives at the end of the day. wish me luck ✨️

[this-train-terminates-here]

Today was worse than yesterday. I had school, which in a of itself isn’t too bad, I have some of my favourite subjects today. I love history. It just gets so tiring. And I'm sick. Been having a killer headache all day, nurse didn't let me go home. I have assignments due tomorrow. I haven't done them. My dofe login isn't working, deadline is Friday. I probably won't do silver, I cannot be fucked. Some bitch today said that it was ok and good that if you paid more for schooling you get a higher standard. Call me commie but I don't think it's ok. Fuck this. I got physics homework. It's easy but I'm just not bothered to get the sheet out. I have some math that makes no sense due tomorrow, but it doesn't make sense so idk what I'll do. I have a mandarin oral test in two days Andi haven't even got answers to the questions. Honestly just praying I have a sick day tmr.

I got none of my plans done. I need to take down my posters though, fml if Maud and Hanna find out I collect little cards with Korean men on them. Maybe I should just force them to watch Dr Who or Good Omens.

Anyway I have tube maps to out on my wall that are slay I so regret not buying an Elizabeth line roundel. I'll post a pic of my maps when they're up.

On a completely separate note why are people liking my posts like idc if it's just 1 or 2 people how did you find this why is it amusing it's my third day on Tumblr and I'm just using it as a therapist because I don't trust my friends enough so a) how are you finding this shit b) why are you liking this shit but hey I mean if my nonsensical ramblings amuse you then go ahead have fun (???)

[zebee-nyx]

CalmWriMo Day 2!

[11/2/2023]

Update!

Waywards Progress:

Made a bit of progress with one of the character prologues (has been/will be shared, but the prologues are honestly more just for me to get a better idea of writing the characters on their own before dumping them into the story ('^.^)b) Also I have the overall outline vaguely set. It's workable for now, but not sure I'm 100% happy with it. Also have a handful of ideas rattling around in that hollow brain of mine! I have the idea of making Waywards a bit "episodic" so to speak. Gonna play around and experiment with the idea a bit to see if it actually works. Besides that! If anyone has tips, tricks, advice on story structures / planning writing I am all ears! I'm way too use to just going mostly full freeform with writing stories so planning things is proving a bit of a hurdle rn (0^0). Waywards is probably the largest thing I've started to write so I'm a little worried I'll burn a lot of time and energy focusing on somethings that may just end up not fitting later on story wise... ('0.0)

2 Hour Writing Goal: ✅

Blurb: [see below]

Self Care:

Food: ✅ [leftovers!]

Hydration: ✅

Sleep: ✅ [was cutting it close last night (‘-.-), the desire to note take the night away is strong]

Reading: ✅ [Read a chapter!]

Worldbuilding blurb: Meta-Humans

What is a Meta-Human?

A Meta-Human, usually just shortened to "Meta", is simply anyone who has some form of artificially engineered genetics above a certain threshold [haven't quite decided exactly where the line will be and not sure I will tbh].

With breakthroughs in genetic engineered by corporations such as Biotechna and Helix, control over one's genetics can go as far as their wallet can take them. What kind of things could be done these kinds of augs you may ask? Firstly, most diseases and genetic disorders have effectively become curable (no promises it'll be affordable, so most people don't have access). Next, cloning! It can be done, although is still in more of pioneering phase during the time period Waywards is set in and is prone to various setbacks. Usually anyone born via any cloning or "built from scratch" process are technically considered corporate property... Want a designer baby? Trivial!

Although more intresting, at least visually, is people can now adopt some unique characteristics. One could grow a tail, pointed ears, gain inhuman strength, even completely alter skin into scales. The only real limitation is money, imagination, and the outer limits of genetic stability. A generation has gone by since the technologies have become available and now some features have proven to be inheritable. This fact coupled with some ‘back alley’ genetic engineering lead to a small population boom of Metas. While still a minority of the population there are now extremely diverse communities of Metas across the city.

[Thanks for reading! Won't have as much time tmr for writing (>.<), but I promise there will at least be a bit of a blurb of worldbuilding stuff here. Anyways and always, hope you are having a lovely day, peace! (-v-)v]

[ellorypurebloodculture]

Hi Ellory! ✨

For the Asker's Ask Game:

1) Bone of the Father: I love all of your fics so this was really hard to pick... Until I remembered this one and it was a done deal. I adore the way the father-daughter bond was unplanned but they both grasped onto it so desperately. The way Hariana adapts, the way Marvolo instantly switched from murder to protection... I think it's fascinating, frankly, and can only hope that, if the whim and inspiration strikes you, that one day you might do a sequel. Perhaps of them living together as family or maybe TMR's pov, going from an unwanted orphan to an isolated dark lord and wraith... To a man with an adoring daughter of his own 🥺 (and how he'd react to someone interested in his daughter like five mins after he got her, first vassal grandson or no 🤭) even if you never do, my imagination is enough because that fic is just *chefs kiss*, so visceral and urgh-! Thank you for posting it ✨

6) Siriana Black making magical lace to wrap around her cut hair, it's just really visual and romantic in that desperate, slightly dark fairytale way... I also always remember "Siriana shorn off her hair, and James climbed the night-sky stair"...

11) More crossovers probably, I'd read them even if I didn't know the other fandom. My reasons for this are because of what we've seen in the three crossovers you've done: this amazing, electrifying, compelling ability to just... Enfold other universes/fandoms into your style/AU-culture. Like Mycroft plucking at the evidence of Pleione's world and background to piece together a hope for a life together, of how well Wednesday slotted into MoD-Harry's ideal love, how you handled Narutoverse without involving HP and it was mind-blowingly detailed and addictive. I just think seeing you work with crossovers is amazing twofold, both enjoying the content as a reader but also getting to see how you reconcile your style/AU with them!

Thank you, Anon! This put a huge smile on my face.

I have tried several times to write more in Bone of the Father with no luck. If that ever changes, I will happily share the result with you all. 💛

I appreciate that! Maybe I'll consider trying more fusions/crossovers this year.

[lazar-codes]

10/05/2023 || Day 12

Spent today catching up on studying, with today's topic being Big O notation. I was going over some practice problems to make sure I get it when I ran into some errors from the website that showed them, so that's not good. At first I was like "ok, maybe I'm more rusty than I thought", but then I moved onto another question whose answer I knew and it wasn't the one they said it was, so I did some digging and am 99% convinced they had the wrong answer there. So that was fun. Oh yes, and I also did 2 "easy" LeetCode questions to warm up this morning.

In other news, I decided to continue to tackle my Wordle project. Here's how it looks like now, with more details at the bottom of the line.

I spend today getting those buttons to work, as before I only had it where you can only use the keyboard for input. Now, I have both. Again, it was really tricky to get the specific field in a specific row to be active, but I managed to do that using global variables. It's probably not the best way, but it works for now.

I've been having random problems with the accessibility of fields. For instance, when the user hasn't written anything yet, the fields in the first row are active. Ok, that's good. But for some reason the fields in the 3rd or 6th row will be accessible also...? I have no idea why that is, but when I delete the "disabled" property on the HTML element and put it back, that fixes it...? I'll dig into it later.

Also, ignore the funky "enter" and backspace buttons. I will fight CSS over that tmr.

But that's all for today!

[jellyluvr]

I lied I did not post two fics yesterday but I'm packing rn 🥲🥲🥲 but I'll try and see if I'll be able to make fics on my trip. It's like 5 days I think?? Anyway, I have to leave at 8am tmr so I probably won't be able to post anything unless it's today. I'm not pressured or anything, writing is really fun plus the smut I write makes my heart fucking explode. And it's just generally fun so I'll write still lmfao

[friendlyneighborhoodcapricorn]

hii!! okay hi cool sO if it’s not too much trouble could i get a preferably male mcu/tasmv matchup please?<3

m'names hero:) (she/her) and my friends usually call me rosie or ro--and i'm an entp/enfj if you're in the mbti stuff

as appearances go I’m 5’1 and I’m Italian, english, and asian. i’m a bit tan, ‘ve got light brown hair with bangs and considerablyy big, brown eyes. now cough I hope m’not coming off as shallow but I’m really proud of my body? work really rather hard on it and I quite like showing it off from time to time— as should everyone, we’re all hot shit ;) i breathe sundresses, usually wear little bows in my hair, and I wear my grandmother’s pearls 25/8 they make me feel like a pRINCESS

I have the tightest core friend group of 3 including myself— they’re my soulmates, really, we met at a museum and everything. In the literal sense I have no problem with conversation in general it’s my favorite thing I could talk about absolutely anything. if I ever meet a cute boy tho.. dear god it’s over me I’m a blushing mess— moreover my love language(s) are physical touch, words of affirmation, and gift giving (I like things that reflect how proper beautiful I am sue me💅)

I write poems and short stories, and i play guitar and sing, i’ve actually won a few awards for that, and uh I’ve probably read a good couple hundred books in my life time— I like to think I have near perfect vision but my friends say I’m damn near blind— and I’ve only really read the classics.

I’m a huge movie buff too, again I’m a classics fiend *but* my current favourites are Juno and Matilda— unfortunately my parents passed their respective individuality complexes onto me it’s been quite the ride

uhhh what else- i’m the top of my class and my school’s first asian vice president!! yay!!! And oH I don’t really have a type, I just know charisma is so, so painfully attractive, and I love a good height difference but who doesn’t ;)

lots and lots of love please don’t feel any pressure in answering this quickly or at all (i'm so sorry this was so very long) I’m in no rush luv you <33

I love your name by the way, reminds me of Laurie from little women:)

You're the sweetest omg! You mentioned wanting a matchup for the mcu and tmr in a follow-up, so I'll be doing that :) Ro is an absolutely amazing nickname, btw!

This took a while, I'm so sorry for that! I hope you still enjoy it regardless!

For the MCU, I match you with...

Steve Rogers/Captain America

You’re in charge of catching him up on movies he missed while he was busy being a popsicle.

Even though you weren't from the forties, there was something about you that immediately put him at ease. Almost a sense of familiarity in this strange millenium.

The first time he ever hears you sing, his jaw quite literally drops. He goes full goldfish-mode for a few seconds, and it's as endearing as it is funny.

Dates can be anything from going to a museum, getting dinner at some fancy restaurant, or just sitting quietly on the couch together while you both read.

Steve can use the occasional words of affirmation. On a day-to-day basis, he's a pretty confident guy, but during missions he can have a tendency to second-guess himself. It helps having you around because even when he feels like he can't trust his own judgement, he knows he can trust yours.

Newt

Let's say you two met because you were both working in the "gardens". The Glade is only so big, however, so you probably saw each other around before that. But you really started talking in the gardens.

Newt is an easy-going guy, but he does know pretty much everything that's going on in the Glade. He knows how you're always up for conversation, so he tries to take that opportunity.

And then finds it incredibly endearing when you turn into a stuttering mess.

There really isn't much to do for fun around the Glade, but singing happens to be one of them. Well, if Wicked is kind enough to let you remember any songs. In case they do, Newt has definitely asked you to sing for him -and then tried to learn the song himself. He's a horrible singer though.

You can't really go on dates because again: the Glade is pretty small. But Newt will wake you up in the middle of the night to sneak off into the woods, only to reveal he's planned the most romantic moonlit picnic.

This is long overdue, but I hope you still enjoyed it! Thank you for requesting and have a lovely day/night <3

[kiawren]

I don't usually post fics but I really liked this silly chatfic I made of me and the alola squad lol

(fic under cut!)

Usernames:

Kiawe: FIRE0FALOLA

Sophocles: EpicGamer777

Lana: icaughtkyogre

Mallow: pinaptart

Lillie: ❀ Lillie ❀

Wren (my s/i): woolooloo

(for context, kiawe is wren's (my) romantic f/o and the rest of us are all friends)

—

woolooloo added FIRE0FALOLA, icaughtkyogre and 3 more to Alola Squad!

woolooloo: I thought a gc would be nice for us to talk when we're not together

icaughtkyogre: yooo a gc 🔥

FIRE0FALOLA: Why do we need a group chat? We see each other every day

woolooloo: Oh ok i'll just delete this then

FIRE0FALOLA: NO WAIT DON'T!!! SORRY WREN DON'T DELETE THIS COME BACK

EpicGamer777: KGjfgwQ639?&Pfhg9

EpicGamer777: sorry

EpicGamer777: togedemaru rolled over my keyboard

icaughtkyrogre: lmao

❀ Lillie ❀: oh hello everyone (*^▽^*)

woolooloo Hi lillie :)

icaughtkyogre: hi lillie :)

FIRE0FALOLA: Hi Lillie :)

EpicGamer777: hi lilliEQg8fhg2w

❀ Lillie ❀: what's everyone doing now? (^o^)/

icaughtkyogre: [lyingonthesand.jpg]

FIRE0FALOLA: How long have you been there? The sun is already setting

icaughtkyogre: 4 hours

woolooloo: Average lana activity

woolooloo: How's the sand?

icaughtkyogre: wet

woolooloo: Hey wheres mallow?

EpicGamer777: @pinaptart

❀ Lillie ❀: I think mallow is baking dessert (´⊙ω⊙`)?

FIRE0FALOLA: It's already dark outside, Lana are you still on the sand??

icaughtkyogre: yeah it's nice

pinaptart: Hello everyone! I see you guys made a groupchat

❀ Lillie ❀: Hi mallow! (*^▽^*)

EpicGamer777: hi mallOW7

woolooloo: hi mallow :]

woolooloo: what were you doing just now

pinaptart: I was baking dessert

icaughtkyogre: can we see

pinaptart: [honeyglazedberrycupcakes.jpg]

woolooloo: That looks so good??

icaughtkyogre: save us some for tmr or else

pinaptart: Yes sir :salute:

FIRE0FALOLA: Hello

FIRE0FALOLA: Hello

FIRE0FALOLA: Hi

woolooloo: Hi kiawe

FIRE0FALOLA: Yes I m kiawe

FIRE0FALOLA: I love wren

icaughtkyogre: lol I don't think that's kiawe

FIRE0FALOLA: Sorry everyone!!!!

FIRE0FALOLA: My little sister took my phone when I went to the bathroom!!!!

woolooloo: I love you too kiawe

FIRE0FALOLA: Huh

FIRE0FALOLA: Shit

FIRE0FALOLA: How did she

EpicGamer777: he went offline lol

icaughtkyogre: kiawe.exe stopped working

❀ Lillie ❀: haha mimo is so cute (´▽｀;)

pinaptart: Quick question guys, does pinap belong on pizza?

woolooloo: Yes

icaughtkyogre: no it does not

woolooloo: Are your tastebuds okay do you need them checked

woolooloo: How could you not like pinap on pizza :(

EpicGamer777: that's disgusting

icaughtkyogre: see

woolooloo: Why are you all against me

woolooloo: @❀ Lillie ❀ does pinap taste good on pizza say yes

❀ Lillie ❀: I have no preference (＾ω＾)

icaughtkyogre: say it's ass

❀ Lillie ❀: don't make me choose please (╥_╥) I like whatever mallow cooks

pinaptart: How did you know I asked that because I was gonna make pizza for you guys?

icaughtkyogre: all 6 of us are connected by telepathy

woolooloo: It's the Power of Friendship™

EpicGamer777: holy shit you're gonna make pizza for us

EpicGamer777: we love you mallow

woolooloo: We love you mallow

icaughtkyogre: we love you mallow

❀ Lillie ❀: we love you mallow (⌒▽⌒)☆

pinaptart: I love you guys too

pinaptart: But could you pick a side 😔

woolooloo: Add the pinap 🔥🔥🔥

icaughtkyogre: don't add the pinap 🔥🔥🔥

icaughtkyogre: wren you're uncultured

woolooloo: hey

woolooloo: @FIRE0FALOLA kiawe please back me up

icaughtkyogre: he's probably still recovering from just now

woolooloo: @FIRE0FALOLA @FIRE0FALOLA

FIRE0FALOLA: Yes Wren? 🙃

woolooloo: Hey kiawe 🙃

woolooloo: Could you tell them pinap tastes awesome on pizza

FIRE0FALOLA: Oh

FIRE0FALOLA: But I prefer pizza without pinap

woolooloo: .......

icaughtkyogre: BETRAYED

woolooloo: We're breaking up

FIRE0FALOLA: WHAT

FIRE0FALOLA: WHAT

FIRE0FALOLA: WHAT DID I DO

FIRE0FALOLA: WAIT ARE YOU BEING SERIOUS

FIRE0FALOLA: WREN

FIRE0FALOLA: WREN???

FIRE0FALOLA: WREN???? 😭😭😭😭

FIRE0FALOLA: I take it back

FIRE0FALOLA: Pinap on pizza is the best food created. Top tier gourmet food. Culinary perfection. Gastronomical genius.

woolooloo: THANK YOU

woolooloo: ILYSM <3

FIRE0FALOLA: I LOVE YOU TOO 🥺🥺🥺

icaughtkyogre: CORNY LAME BOOO

icaughtkyogre: 🍅🍅🍅👎👎👎👎🍅🍅🍅

icaughtkyogre: that's cheating

woolooloo: No it's not

FIRE0FALOLA: No it's not

icaughtkyogre: those who agree it's cheating say kiawren cancelled

EpicGamer777: kiawren cancelled

EpicGamer777: romance cancelled

❀ Lillie ❀: I don't think it's cheating (＾_＾)

icaughtkyogre: shut up lillie

icaughtkyogre: WAIT

woolooloo: LANA WHAT DID YOU SAY TO LILLIE

icaughtkyogre: WAIT

woolooloo: YOU PROBABLY MADE HER CRY

icaughtkyogre: I DIDNT MEAN IT

icaughtkyogre: I WASNT THINKING WHEN I WAS TYPING THAT

EpicGamer777: lana cancelled

woolooloo: lana cancelled

pinaptart: So

pinaptart: Pinap on pizza yes or no 😑😑😑

pinaptart: If you guys don't decide in 2 mins I won't be making lunch for you

EpicGamer777: NO

woolooloo: WAIT

woolooloo: Lillie we need you to pick a side so it's 3:2

woolooloo: (pick pinap)

EpicGamer777: she's still offline

EpicGamer777: cause you upset her lana

icaughtkyogre: lillie i'm sorry

icaughtkyogre: how on earth should I make it up to you

❀ Lillie ❀: you don't have to (*´・ｖ・)

❀ Lillie ❀: but I vote for pinap on the pizza (★ω★)b

icaughtkyogre: this is cuz of just now wasn't it

❀ Lillie ❀: no, you're completely forgiven, I don't know what you're talking about (⊙︿⊙)?

EpicGamer777: yeah it's cause of just now lol

woolooloo: lol

pinaptart: So sorry guys

pinaptart: I realised we actually don't have pinap at the restaurant now

pinaptart: I thought I was keeping track of how much was left but I guess I've used it all up :,)

icaughtkyogre: LMAO

icaughtkyogre: I guess we're having pinap-less pizza B)

icaughtkyogre: get rekt

woolooloo: :(

FIRE0FALOLA: It's okay Wren! If you're ever craving pizza with pinap I can take you to have it together :)

woolooloo: You're the best

woolooloo: Are you busy now kiawe

FIRE0FALOLA: No, why?

woolooloo: If it's not too late, can you come pick me up to have waffles :]

FIRE0FALOLA: NOW????

FIRE0FALOLA: FUCK YEAH

FIRE0FALOLA: I'M ON CHARIZARD ALREADY ILL BE THERE AT YOUR PLACE IN 5 MINS

icaughtkyogre: cringe + L + #cancelromance

❀ Lillie ❀: I think it's cute <3

❀ Lillie ❀: okay bye guys, rest well tonight, I'm going to spend time with snowy! (*＾ワ＾*)

woolooloo: Bye lillie :)

icaughtkyogre: bye lillie :)

EpicGamer777: bye lillie :)

EpicGamer777: wheres mallow btw

EpicGamer777: she's like never online

icaughtkyogre: restaurant things i assume

EpicGamer777: maybe she just finds us annoying

icaughtkyogre: that makes a lot of sense

EpicGamer777: so everybody's offline except us

icaughtkyogre: yeah kiawe and wren are enjoying their waffles so it's just us

EpicGamer777: aromantic solidarity

icaughtkyogre: aromantic solidarity

[sablesalem668]

How-goes-its? This would make log #5 if I'm correct, I'm tired of going back and forth just to un-remember everything lol.

Some new stuff happening, the first log including sable with all of her abilities is being downgraded into something more believable to a wider audience, or less overpowered (Mary Sue?). I only had her like that because it was to match the other characters made by my friends, but we are no longer friends anymore. But instead of losing sable to that era of my life, she's grown on me rather a lot, so I've decided to keep going with her lol.

On a note continuing with sable, I'm currently mentally mapping out a storyline that I hope to actually become a book one day (Part of the reason I'm downgrading sable). The only abilities sable has now are shapeshifting, teleportation, and I'm still debating on the levitation bit (might include it but only under certain circumstances.).

I kinda really want her fire to be implemented into her design, and dgmw, fire is definitely gonna be a part of her story. But I was just absolutely enthralled with her "sentimental blaze" as I called it, it felt like a cool little way to express myself. But now I don't even know if I should, because idk if it would stir up anything ugly with re-using stuff from a past friendship. I came up with the idea for sentimental blaze, but it was a divergent from a different ability inspired by one of the friends. I don't know, I'll probably figure something out.

But enough about that, I've also been learning how to draw humans after- what, like forever of drawing? I've always only drawn animals, but surprisingly humans have been coming along pretty well. Not awfully great, but I've got the basics of muscular anatomy down from my time with animals. I'm not too great at hair, or faces like at all, but I'm o k a y at drawing bodies. I just kinda wish I were able to draw humanoids with bird legs, I need it for something development wise.

That's almost everything, I'll probably remember more tmr and edit the message, but today I did the first anima(tion?)tic since that split up I mentioned. And just in case this does become a book, nothing in this is canon, everything will be kept a secret (I like my secrets).

Im also in the progress of making human sable in a Lucario onesie (courtesy of the drawing on the right, I couldn't find the credit, but if I do I'll edit the message.) I haven't drawn the hands yet or color yet, but I'm getting to that lmao.

Added a bird pic too, have a good day/night 💙

[thestarinstarving]

helloooo tumblr

mostly successful fast today! chewed and spat my dinner + a little bit of chocolate, some of it might have gone down but i don't really mind

gonna try fast until 12 tmr, aka extending this 24 hr fast to 28. i get tempted to make it even longer but ik i'll just binge so oh well, better not. will do a strawberry mono tomorrow instead!

taking sunday as a meta day bc i'm going out to eat and just wanna enjoy it honestly. i get a lot of exercise on saturdays and sundays so i'll probably still be under my maintenance seeing as its still pretty high;;;;;

i reaaaaaaally hope i'm at 160lbs tomorrow morning 🙏🙏 would make my day to be at my gw1. ill try to get my w31ght it as low as possible for sunday so i don't go over it again after my meta day

i did some working out earlier but idk how to count it, i kinda calculated some of it bur it wasn't that much so i'm just counting it as like 20 lol. i'm starting to doubt how many cals i actually burn with them honestly

cals in: 0

cals out: ~390

☆8.9k steps, 370 cals

☆ short workout, 20 cals

net cals: -390

sw: 173lbs/78.5kg

cw: 161.4lbs/73.2kg

gw1: 160lbs/72.6kg

ugw: 110lbs/50kg

68 days until summer

[akilice]

Well that's sad, but it was good while it lasted, I guess I can only honor hakurin by saying something silly: Kirei once compared the Tohsaka to vampires, he even said that he cured Rin by burying her all day under the earth of her mansion.

I'll need to finish my fics first, right now I am feeling really down, so dont take my word for it

But its just that I feel like i am not good at things. My art isnt good, and my extra fics are bad in the eyes of the lore experts, and i get some comments that actually make me cry and i delete them, i dont know why they feel the need to interact with a fic they dont like

Sorry for answering you with a vent answer, but i wanted you to know i'll probably wake up fine tmr or something and post a chapter because no matter what i love the ship, I just dont think my work satisfies people