#i'm tired so i don't really have anything else to add in the tags but

[harmonicabisexuals]

X Files Rewatch: Season 7

overall thoughts: I hate to say it but this might be my least favorite season so far? I still really enjoyed it for the most part and there were a few genuinely amazing episodes in here but i gotta admit the blatant flirting was one of the only things that kept some of these more mediocre episodes watchable

msr: the huge debate over when they actually became A Thing is kind of impossible to find a definitive answer for, but I tend to subscribe to the idea that "millennium" was their first kiss (bc it was awkward! but still sweet) and that things progressed quickly from there, bc there is no other explanation for their behavior in "rush" that makes sense in my mind lol. at the same time though, i can see the argument for "all things" being their first time, and i can even make a case for something happening post-"amor fati" or even post-"milagro" if I'm feeling especially silly. in truth though, the main reason why i don't want "all things" to be their first time (even though it makes narrative sense) is that i just want them to have as much time together as possible before mulder's abduction :(

writing: i am still in a committed loving relationship with vince gilligan and i loved all of his episodes with the exception of "hungry", but that was mostly for the lack of M/S interaction and the weird treatment of EDs. but "x-cops" was hilarious and so creative, and "je souhaite" is one of my favorite episodes of the series and honestly a microcosm of the thesis of the show. I also really enjoyed both david duchovny and gillian anderson's solo penned/directed episodes. "hollywood ad" is hilarious and sweet, and "all things" is so quietly introspective with some really beautiful things to say about fate and free will.

directing: one of my favorite sequences in the entire series is the end of "orison" when scully shoots pfaster, it's SO chilling, it makes me literally clutch my chest. rob bowman literally going out with a bang, if i chose to forget about "en ami" (which i'm still mad was his last episode of the series). sigh. "sein und zeit", "closure" and "all things" are also beautifully directed episodes, and i loved vince gilligan's funky directing in "je souhaite" i think his shots and camera angles really add to the comedic bits

hair: their worst hairstyles in the whole series 😭 by the end of the season they've grown out to a better length, but gillian's mid-season hair is especially tragic

favorite episodes: sein und zeit, closure, x-cops, all things, hollywood ad, je souhaite

68% of episodes worth rewatching, and that's being generous...yikes

individual episodes reactions under the cut:

The Sixth Extinction- wtf is happening…scully’s melodramatic letters to mulder tho <3

The Sixth Extinction: Amor Fati- YOU WERE MY CONSTANT, MY TOUCHSTONE

Hungry- the monster guy looks like a young christian bale

Millennium- I forgot the plot of the entire episode once they kissed

Rush- guys stop eye fucking you’re literally at a crime scene

The Goldberg Variation- scully smiling :))))

Orison- choosing to ignore that they made pfaster a demon, otherwise really good

The Amazing Maleeni- silly and smiley :)

Signs and Wonders- terrible terrible awful I hate snakes

Sein Und Zeit- :((( the spiritual successor to paper hearts

Closure- cried like a baby at the end bc I am a sensitive cancer <3

X-Cops- no one does meta humor like the x files

First Person Shooter- a more sexist, more boring kill switch. pass.

Theef- creepy but meh minus the blatant flirting

En Ami- disgusting, was literally dry heaving through the second half 

Chimera- one funny scully monologue but otherwise meh

All Things- beautifully quiet and introspective, also congrats on the sex

Brand X- boring

Hollywood A.D.- so goofy but really funny

Fight Club- terrible, unwatchable

Je Souhaite- amazing, adorable, hilarious, cried real tears at the end

Requiem- this whole episode was just one long Jesse from breaking bad screaming noooo gif

[vincent-sinclair-deserved-better]

hm

thinking of my blorbos but not in a "i love you you love me all is well" way but a "i love you hope you kill me" way lol

[evermoresversion]

For James Beaufort

He has a girlfriend and Ruby tries to ruin it but fail and if you do smut can you add it at the end no pressure to do this.

THE PHOTOS, JAMES BEAUFORT.

A/N I changed Ruby to Elaine because I don't really see Ruby trying to ruin a relationship.

PAIRING James Beaufort x Fem!Reader

TW/TAGS Established relationship, kind of angsty, fluff? at the end. There may be grammatical and spelling errors since English is not my first language.

SUMMARY Despite all of Elaine's attempts to separate you from James, she never succeeded.

REQUESTS ARE OPEN | JAMES' MASTERLIST | MASTERLIST

You and James had been dating for months now.

While most of Maxton Hall considered you both the king and queen of the school, others simply did not accept your relationship.

By "others" I mean Elaine Ellington.

Before, she saw you as a friend or something close to it, someone she could get along with since your father was one of the most important businessmen in the place.

But all thoughts of getting along evaporated the second she saw you arrive at Maxton Hall holding hands with the boy she wanted.

From that moment on she promised herself that she would do everything possible to separate you both.

She went from trying to kiss James in front of you at a party, ending in him rejecting her in front of everyone, to her asking one of his friends to try to flirt with you and making you uncomfortable, which ended in James asking someone to beat the shit out of him, since he couldn't risk his reputation doing it himself, but if he could he would have broken the boy's face.

Faced with several failed attempts, Elaine was beginning to despair, but the idea of letting you and James be happy was never in her plans.

Until one day she had an idea.

Somehow he got a girl quite similar to you from the back and had pictures taken of her kissing another guy at a party.

"Perfect." She muttered looking at the photos on her phone. No doubt James would fall and finally leave you.

She walked through the halls to where James was with his friends, you were in a class right at that moment.

"Can we talk?"

James sighed, tired of the situation.

"No, Elaine, I already told you a thousand times that..."

"It's about y/n."

That certainly caught James' attention. He walked away from the group so he could talk to the blonde.

“What about y/n?”

"I didn't want you to find out from me but it seems fair that you know, I shouldn't play with you like that."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

She took her phone out of her bag and showed the photos to James, watching his every reaction, watching how his jaw tensed and how his breathing quickened.

"When did they take these photos?"

"Friday night."

James simply nodded and without saying anything else, he walked towards where Elaine assumed your class was.

She smiled victoriously and left, believing that James would break up with you in a few minutes.

But the next day all hope disappeared again when she saw you both arrive holding hands and laughing with each other.

As you both passed her, James caught her attention.

"Thank you for telling me about the photos."

"Next time make sure I'm not having dinner with his family when according to you I'm kissing another guy." You smiled with false kindness and both of you continued on your way.

Elaine, on the verge of having a tantrum, decided it would be best to wait until you both break up and be there for James.

Although that clearly didn't happen because you ended up engaged to him sooner than she thought.

disclaimer ── evermoresversion © 2024.

[thecrazyalchemist]

(this post is edited from time to time, some stuff may be outdated) [last edited: Sunday, August 11th, 2024]

---

Stuff to get out of the way:

I am a minor.

I am Israeli. I am tired. If you want Israel wiped away, if you want Jews killed - please get away from my blog and don't come back.

Post relating to my opinion on Zionism and current affairs <- this is a link to the post, please read!

Post relating to fundraisers and charities about the current conflict <- this is a link to the post

I want my blog to be a safe place for me first and foremost, and then a safe space for others. Not the other way around. I just came here to be silly.

This is my bubble. I'll post some stuff about chemistry from time to time (PASSED ORGANIC CHEMISTRY!!!! GOT A 97!!!! SO EXCITED), stuff from fandoms I like, reblog quite a lot maybe definitely too much (as @bettinalevyisdetermined said [I think]: "I abuse the fast-reblog button"), and generally random stuff my dopamine dependant fueled machine likes.

BEWARE: CHRONICALLY ONLINE

You're quite welcome to ask for random hugs! I have plenty - will take ions to run out of stock

Hug gif: (wanted to put it here because it's so good)

Sideblogs:

@randomshowerpoems - poetry sideblog!

@littlegnomewriting - a blog for posting very infrequently stuff I write

@thecrazyalchemist2 - clone if I have been cursed by the post limit

@the-hugger - ✨gimmick blog✨, self explanatory

Not gonna reblog every single post from there to here, don't wanna hit the post limit too often. Wanna know what's in there? Go look!

Also do please express your opinion about what I write! I appreciate it immensely 🥺

Some information bout me:

Current timezone: whatever the time in Greenwich is

Online name: Nick F. but you can call me Nick (you can also call me Crazy Al ;] | or Arsenic/Arsenick if you want - courtesy of @givemeasong-singamelody )

Nickolasnames: Quackamole Ferret (bestowed upon me by the amazing @annotated-catastrophe), alchemy buddy (bestowed upon me by the amazing @alchemicalwerewolf)

Titles: Attraction stealer - beware (bestowed upon me by the amazing @thebookshelflord)

Pronouns: He/Him, although I don't really care

Sexuality: bisexual

Favorite color: blue-green

Favorite molecule: Azidoazide Azide

Taste of my ceiling - chalky

I prefer tea over coffee

Preference order: jackets>hoodies>sweaters

What I think about when I hear the word cozy: sitting on a yellow couch reading a book (preferably next to a crackling fireplace), while thunderstorm, inside a library

If you have anything else you want me to add to here, just ask/comment/message/send in a vision/transport in an ancient bottle/come to me in a dream/however you want, but please be clear about it cause I'm a bit of a dum-dum

My Tag lists: (please choose which one do u want me to add you to!)

Reminder: if you want to be added/removed, just say so! Preferably comment/reblog the tag list you want to be added to/removed from to notify me

Picrews <- this is a link to the list

Quizzes <- this is a link to the list

Tag Games <- this is a link to the list

Making Notes <- this is a link to the list

Other <- this is a link to the list

Anything <- this is a link to the list (this one is mainly for convenience's sake)

Reminder: if you want to be added/removed, just say so! Preferably comment/reblog the tag list you want to be added to/removed from to notify me

---

(this post is edited from time to time, some stuff may be outdated) [last edited: Sunday, August 11th, 2024]

[imbadatwrighting]

Could i get a ryou bakura, y.bakura, yugi, atem, joey and marik(not y.marik) x fem reader(separate of course) when the reader who is not in a relationship with them decides to crawl into bed with them during a sleep over due to not being able to sleep and they both have major crushes on each other but they get overly flustered when they wake up to reader cuddled up to their chest

I just thought this was a really cute idea and haven’t seen anyone do this

Ofc I’ll be happy to do that <3 the only thing is imma change it to gender neutral

I literally love this though

Yugioh boys with an unexpected cuddle buddy

Tags (is that what you call them?? Idk) : gn reader, tired reader, super super short, idk what else to add mb

Joey Wheeler

Listen, I'm not saying he screamed but I'm not saying he didn't scream either

He was so confused

Moves around a lot in bed so when he woke up he was resting his head on your thighs

Refuses to tell anyone about it but is always thinking about it

If you're with him right before he falls asleep, he's super fun

Until he randomly passes out but still

A super big snorer

Like he literally sounds like a car alarm

Super warm on some night but then on other nights feels like an icicle

Yugi Muto

Cutie woke up as soon as you hopped into his bed

Thought you just got into the wrong bed

tried to tell you that but you just screamed and threw a pillow at him

When you told him you wanted to sleep in his bed he offered to sleep somewhere else but you then told him you wanted to sleep with him

Got all red

Joey was still up and overheard it so he thought you two were going to have sex

Told everyone the next day

Anyways

He was very stiff in the beginning but once he fell asleep he was super comfy

Asked you on a date the next day

Yami Yugi

Like Yugi he woke up as soon as you got into his bed

Except with him he didn't say anything to you

Put an arm around you

Let you cuddle up against him

Was so cold that it evened out the warm blankets which is weird considering that in the day he's super hot

escpecially his hands but not like sweaty hot

Didn't say anything about it the next day but couldn't get it out of his head

Lets you come into his bed as much as you want

Bakura

When he woke up he didn't really notice you at first

Cuddled up to you thinking that you were a pillow and dreamed that the pillow was you

Until his pillow started snoring

Eyes shot wide open and he jumped up

Thought he saw the lights for a moment

He had to hold in a scream while his face became covered in blush. Became a nervous wreck

Woke you up by shaking you while whispering in your ear

You kicked him off his own bed

Not that he cared

Thought he was dreaming but when he found out he wasn't, he went and made you breakfast in bed

Y. Bakura

Literally did not care at all

The only reason that he even thought about it was that you kept stealing his damn blankets

He ended up being the one to start the little cuddle fest

Was pissed that you kept stealing his blankets but he thought that you wouldn't be back so he didn't say anything

Oh how wrong he was

Usually wakes up before you and does his own thing

He honestly considered passing you along

Eventually gave up

A good cuddle when he falls asleep but refuses to be close to you when awake

you being in his bed most nights made him super cocky though

Malik Ishtar

Best cuddles known to man frfr

He didn't technically wake up when you came into his bed but he somehow knew that you did

Super chill about it in the morning

Unless you brought it up, he didn't

Said that you could come over anytime you wanted to

Wrote about it in his diary

It's his favorite part of the day

Always smiles and looks forward to you coming over

you two got together after a couple more nights of you staying in his bed

Brags about it with people he's close to

Always ends up with him on your chest or the other way around, no matter what

Bonus

I’m in love with her frfr

Mai Valentine

Already knew you were coming

Don't ask how she just did

If you come before she falls asleep then be prepared to be forced to do face masks, no matter how tired you are and listen to her talk shit about other people

If you come after she falls asleep then prepare to have her involuntary push your head into her chest

Warm cuddle buddy but her room in always cold so it doesn't really matter

Sleeps in so if you don't then be prepared for you to be stuck in her arms for a couple hours

Smirks whenever she wakes up and you start blushing

[bluebelly-sun-serpentine]

Hello! Some info about this blog:

COMMON TAGS:

#bluebellyphotos (original photo posts)

#bluebellytalks (text posts and reblog comments)

#flora (plant and landscape photos)

#fauna (animal photos)

#arthropods (bugs and friends)*

#invertebrates (includes slugs and bugs and other critters)*

#scenes from my father's garden (a little series)

#us politics and #usa politics for your blocklist

*For spiders I also give content and trigger warnings in the tags. You can block spider posts by blocking #cw spiders or #tw spiders. I try to be responsive to reasonable content warning requests so send me an ask if there's anything else you want me to add to my tags.

FAQ:

What camera and lenses do you use?

I use a Sony A7Riv (a mirrorless digital camera) and most often I am using a 35mm prime lens (the FE 1.4/35 GM) or the less fancy but still serviceable 85mm prime (FE 1.8/85). I bought them all used off KEH, which I really recommend for anyone in North America trying to spend less money on gear. The majority of the photos posted here were made using that camera body and one of those two lenses, although I do occasionally use converters and lenses from old analog SLRs. I don't post my film work to this blog, but if you want to know about analog cameras and film photography, shoot me an ask.

Where was this photo taken?

After deliberating for a long time, I made a decision to not share geolocative information with my photos unless I was making a larger text post about the area and its history. I remember the world before geotagging and instagram, and I have really mixed feelings about – on some level – reducing the landscapes and lifeways I cherish to their aesthetics. While I do trust most of you to treat the places you visit with care, I've also seen a lot of trampled superblooms and summit queues for that one perfect shot. So if I'm going to tell you where something is, I also want to include information about why that place is so special. Unfortunately, most of the time I am too tired to write something long enough to do the place justice.

How do you edit your photos? Do you use presets, and if so, which ones?

For years this has been my workflow: I import everything into Adobe Lightroom Classic, which I like for its organizational capacity more than anything else. I built my own presets, each for specific lighting conditions, weather conditions, and landscape types, which I apply as photos come in. Then I do a second pass and make adjustments on each photo. I may share preset packages at some point – I just have to get around to it. I delete a lot of work, because the Sony a7riv files are enormous. I export everything for tumblr at or below 2000 pixels on the long edge, so the file sizes you guys see are comparatively small (want a larger file for some reason? send me an ask). I do work with photoshop as well, but generally not for the photos I post to this blog. I have been considering moving everything over to Darktable, which is open source. Update: Recently I lost access to Adobe CC for financial reasons ( am between jobs). If you want to help support bluebelly, I set up a kofi.

NEW FOLLOWERS:

I get a lot of bot followers. If your blog has a profile pic, a header image, and some text in your info section that was clearly written by a human I’m much less likely to accidentally block you. I don't need you to list identity information or post a picture of yourself (I am glad you protect your privacy). Even just changing your blog’s colors can help signal you are human to other tumblr users, but if you get blocked it's almost certainly because you looked like a bot and I was going through the motions of clearing them out. If I notice your blog posting AI content I will block you even if you appear to be human and friendly. My only real aim with bluebelly-sun-serpentine is to encourage us all to pay attention to the world around us and to celebrate what that attention can do to connect us to all kinds of life, and I feel like ai is just kind antithetical to that, so I do my best to keep it off my dash.

[billowingangel]

Welcome ✧

I've been into hetalia since 2016 and for a while I tried to pretend I didn't like it....And I'm tired of living that lie! So I'm back to thinking, loving, obsessing, and writing about Hetalia.

I also block very freely and I'd rather people be 18+ to interact (since occasionally I may post nsfw/nsft which I will always tag)

I'm currently working on a few fanfictions which you can find on AO3 and FF.net

My favorite character is Canada 🍁 And I ship him with pretty much anyone...and I mean anyone...If that makes you uncomfortable please feel free to block this blog or the tags associated with ships you are uncomfortable with. I may at times reblog problematic ships, I'll add tags for the ship and a cw for the problematic element of the ship. Please take care of your mental health and curate your online space to what is best for you ♡ ˎˊ˗

more information below the canada picture

Wow, you clicked continue reading so here's more annoying stuff about me and this blog (^_^)

I spam reblog, mostly fanart (so many in this fandom are so talented!) and miscellaneous things (memes, random shit, writing tips, etc).

I'll occasionally post some of my own fanfictions (drabbles or links to them)

I also will post my rambling silly thoughts. I have decided to let myself loose and be as annoying authentic as possible here.

Also I will do my best to tag content/trigger warnings but I may forget (memory of a goldfish) so if I do please let me know

Here are some tags I use on this blog to organize (still working on what tags to use) ᯓ★

#art reblog ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡): self explanatory

#hetalia fanart ✨: reblogs of hetalia fanart

#canon tbh: posts that I see as accurate to character's personalities, how I perceive them, and how I think they'd act

#hetalia fanfiction:

#hetalia meme:

#positivity: posts and reblogs that are positiive

#misc: posts that are surprisingly not related to hetalia

#me core: reblogs that I really relate to

#fanfic imagine: imagining a fanfiction and maybe i'll write or finish the idea

#fanfic in progress: my thoughts during the process of writing fanfiction, debating whether I should do this or that, talking about what I plan to do, blah blah

#my fanfic: fanfiction that I have written, usually a link to ao3 but may also be to ff.net

I also mostly tag hetalia characters as hws so if you look up hws canada (for example) you'll be able to see all posts about that character

Some of my favorite posts of mine ┈─★

Now more about me which is why you're reading this (I'm just kidding)

Call me angel or anything really I don't care what I'm called (ᐢ. ̫ .ᐢ)

Also please feel free to message me!! I love talking to people but I get a bit hestitant about initiating. My discord is billowingangel if you want to talk there!

I'm 20 years old and I go by she/her pronouns and I'm a lesbian I love me some boobs what can I say ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I may be a raging homosexual but I'm also a raging hetaliansexual (joke), I am attracted to so many fictional male characters and shockingly a ton of them are from hetalia (shoot me dead)

I love hetalia if that isn't obvious, it's on my brain a probably disturbing amount what can I say I'm mentally ill. I also like other anime (demon slayer <333, jujutsu kaisen, the witch and the beast, parasyte, etc), doctor who (so happy there's a new season), yuri manga!!, and other shit. I love horrors and thrillers! I rarely watch romantic comedies but I love reading romance in fanfiction ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I'm working on my own book (probably my 20th book) but I'm hoping to actually finish this one.

I am also working on multiple fanfictions: red means it's completed

off the grid: canada slightly snaps and goes on vacation lol

???:idk what to call it, america, england, and france are all fighting for canada's love and he's oblivious

unhealthy obsession: another country becomes obsessed with canada

Falling for Canada: multiple rarepair oneshots with Canada

My first omegaverse 0.0

a really stupid horror drabble that I posted

amecan week 2024

And I believe that's it~ Maybe I'll add my favorite ships

[starflungwaddledee]

alright. look, we're going to go into this because i genuinely want to think you didn't mean harm by this, but it's unacceptable to use this sort of manipulative phrasing. especially with strangers, some of whom are kids.

this is not a call-out. i've hidden all names except my own. i just need to address this post i was tagged in, and don't want to add it onto the end of the original post. i could also have done this privately, but i want this to be here for the other folks who were @'d. i won't @ anyone else who was mentioned in this post, but many of us are mutuals, so if you see this post and you're feeling at all stressed out or bad, i recommend just clicking through because i'm going to go into this.

firstly, and i'm going to make this transparent, person who @'d me: i don't think you're being malicious or did anything purposefully bad. i don't think you intended harm or that you are "a bad person". i don't have a single negative thought about you as a person. i don't make this post to be mean. i truly think you made an earnest mistake that could easily have hurt others, and i am stepping in with the hope this can be avoided in the future! per my usual boundaries on reassurance seeking, i will not reassure about this further.

secondly, the post that you tacked this onto IS important and a helpful resource, and it is great to bring attention to it. we should be doing everything we can to not only defend against, but actively fight back against generative AI. many people cannot access the most commonly recommended tools (myself included), so a resource like this is fantastic and i'm glad to learn about it and share it! i don't speak for anyone else, but i've said before that i personally don't mind being tagged in resources that could help me or others and i'm usually happy to share them, especially if i think the latter

but, assuming that you are genuinely well meaning and don't know better, you need to know that this is not the way to go about it. i don't mean mass-tagging, which is fine in times like this imo, i mean your written add-ons that actively guilt trip every single person you tagged.

"if you weren't convinced by the idea of being a good person" and "I do hope anyone I @'d isn't a bad person" in particular.

you may not have realised, but these are profoundly manipulative and cruel things to say. regardless of how you intended them, they are inciting guilt in the reader, and especially in the people who you actively called to come and look at it. here's what it sounds like:

"hey! you! yeah you! come look at this!! come closer! now, do what i ask you to do, or you're a bad person."

there are a million and one reasons someone might not reblog something. being tired, offline, anxious, even needing to run a specifically professional blog with exclusively your art on it for your own financial survival which makes it hard to reblog important posts like this; none of those are bad.

in this case, only one thing makes them a "bad person", and it's "they're pro-generative AI and did not reblog because they want to hide this information to ensure they can continue stealing from creatives".

i'm fairly confident you don't actually think anyone you tagged here has that point of view, or that you really have any doubts about their stances on generative AI. in fact, of the folks i recognise here, they're all independent creatives, sharing artwork with fandom for free on the internet. they are the victims of generative AI, and like most of us, are facing a terrifying future and are already desperate to find a way to defend/fight back.

you do not need to use manipulative language like this to get us to care about this sort of content! this affects us all, content creators and content consumers alike!

in future if you want to direct folks to something like this, which is super helpful and it was good of you to do!, you can just @ them so they see it. you can even say something like "this is important and some reblogs would sure help to boost it!". this is still a call to action, but without the manipulative phrasing, just in case they cannot act for any reason.

in the end, guilt tripping people like this, intentional or otherwise, is dangerous.

at best it will make them feel like shit and they'll feel forced to reblog + share from you out of guilt rather than just believing in the cause. and sometimes it feels like it's most effective, especially when things are urgent; but in my opinion the risk of harm is just too high. because at worst, you could accidentally send someone into a negative thinking spiral. you can never know what people are going through offline, or outside of your spaces, and how something like this will hit them.

[wifey-ohara]

Blood and fire, they burn the same way

Part1

Angsty miguel &teen spider!reader

Notes: mentioned characters death, nothing major, sad, mentiones of threats of violence, this one is just dull really, i should really add to it ,hobie is here!,not proof read

tag list:@mvlanchqly

4:00 am

You woke up the next morning feeling refreshed and well rested, it's been years since you had that kind of good sleep, is this what revenge feels like? Now you understand why villains hold grudges so bad

With a small smirk, you got up and got ready for your day, you didn't have anything to do today, so a day in the lab it is then, your mood got better at the decision you made.

Then it fell back down

There he was, right where you left him, leaning on the wall eyes so puffy you doubted he could open them

Pathetic

With a small huff you entered the kitchen making yourself a drink, hoping that your day wouldn't be ruined

You were almost done when you heared him a take a sharp breath,

It took a moment for him to move, standing up and walking towards you, blocking your exit,, too much for hoping you think

"Good morning " his voice was hourse, raw, painful, how much did he cry

"morning" you replied standing in front of him drink in your hand, waiting for him to move

"..H-how did you sleep?" he asked, almost shy

"good, thanks for asking" you answered

With a slight flinch he backed up, giving you room to move and go to your lab

-

Miguel wantched you leave and then with a click, you were gone

He wondered how hard is it gonna be, if it isn't impossible

So now, sitting in the couch his brain trying to process what happened to him in those last few days

He killed his wife and daughter because he was selfish, destroying a universe in the process

He missed his actual wife's death when she waiting for him to return, he didn't get to say goodbye, he doesn't know if he deserve to do so

And you, with you cold eyes and colder replies, pouring acid into his wounds, he deserves it, he knows he does, but he wants to do right by you, try and fix whatever shattered glass left between you two, and it seems that it'll cut him every step of the way, and he doesn't mind one bit, as long as you don't wish him dead, that's all he wants, not forgiveness, not a relationship, not love, only a middle ground, to live with you without feeling the heavy air around

He was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the lab door open

"thanks Ben, I'll read it and take care of it" you said getting out, a screen showing that you're on a call with ben, another saving a report

"thanks dude! I'm sorry i didnt do it last night, i was so tired i fell asleep so quick!" the voice from the screen said

"don't worry about it I'll see you next time" you said hanging up..

Then a normal door opening and closing again,, the one to your room this time

He sighed, leaning back on the couch, staring at the ceiling above him

What wouldn't he give for forgiveness?

And then the door knocked...

He stood up to open it, and was shocked to find..

"hobart?"

In all his punky glory, with his wide and wild hair, shiny piercings, hobart brown was at his door step

He was smirking a cocky smile, one that fell the moment he laid eyes on the taller man, soon turning into a frown as he looked miguel up and down

Miguel was still confused..

Hobie recovered quick though, pushing past him and into the house, yelling "Ayo, smartass, where you at? You're never late!" into the house, it didn't surprise miguel that much, what did surprise him was you, coming out of your room, a playful frown on your face "I can get too occupied in a project from time to time" fixing you outfit

He stood there in the middle of the living room watching you walking around, collecting your, phone, wallet and anything else someone would need for an outing, hobie behind you talking about something or the other, he didn't really care

He knows he shouldn't ask, that he has no right to do so, but the words leave his mouth, forced.

"where are you going?"

-

You paused midway through your quick search for your stuff, looking at him, hobie also quieted down behind you, you know it a big deal when that happens

Hobie Brown was your closest friend,(he might say that someone earns such label when you have a bunch of friends, and then choose who you let in or not, which you don't, but you'll roll your eyes every time at it anyway) knows about your fathers, rather nostalgic trip he had for 12 years, only he and lyla do, he found out when came to loot in on your snacks and found you crying, rare, yes, but possible, he asked you what was wrong and you told him, what was a talk about your mother turned into your life story, he listened the whole time, only commenting after, he had alot of choice words, still does but you convinced him out of going to the universe your father was in and beating the crap out of him both for cheating and abandoning you

So now, the fact that he didn't have a "talk" with him is impressive, what's more so, is that he didn't answer miguel at the moment

Is he being funny?

No way he thinks that i must answer

Did he hit his head, is he insane?

Taking a breath, you look in his eyes, red irises, red and puffy "out." you said, continuing your tour around your house, then heading to the door where miguel stood, going past him and leaving, you could swear if you had a knife you could cut the tension he caused, as if he ever caused anything else to you

"be safe" he said

"as if they needed to hear that from you" hobie scoffed, slowly reaching his limits

"Come on we're gonna be late" you said, already out the door

sorry for not posting, just can't seem to write lately,but i promise to get them doe eventually!

[frenziedslashers]

You Drive Me Crazy

A/N: Self-indulgent Rick fic, whaat-- @joelsgeetar tagging you because I brought it up to you while we were chatting lmao

Pairing: Rick Grimes x GN!Reader

Warnings: Jealousy, Language, Spencer is a DickheadTM, Alludes to sexual themes but it's really only making out and slight grinding/dry humping whoowhoo, lmk if I need to add anything else

REQUESTING INFO || TWD MASTERLIST

Alexandria. A place of new, a place of light. This was your new home now - much to Rick Grimes' disapproval - everyone felt so much safer behind these walls. There were other people. People who were clean and neat. People who had friendly smiles. People who were old and young. Women, Men, Children. This had to be your new start. It had to. If it wasn't, you weren't sure if you even had faith in any other community. In the future.

Rick was the only one who seemed on edge with the whole situation. Everyone else was enjoying the scenery. The kindness of everyone within the walls. The safety. The house.

"I don't trust 'em," Rick spat, fingers pushing the curtains back so he could peak out the window. "Rick," you sighed, reaching out to rub his shoulder blade. Standing beside him while peaking through the blinds yourself. Just you didn't pry them open like he did.

You felt his muscles tense and then relax under your touch. A soft sigh left his lips before looking down and over at you. Waiting for you to continue. "Let's just give them a chance, okay?" He scoffed, shaking his head while looking back to the window before pulling his hand away. Crossing his arms over his chest. "What if they turn out like with the Governor. Or Terminus? What if we get hurt?" You shrugged, you had thought about that. That crossed all of your minds. "We're too tired to keep running, Rick. Just a couple days? That's all we ask, okay?" He sighed, looking back down at you. He hated how you could convince him to say anything with just that look in your eyes.

"Isn't it your turn? For the interview," you nodded with a sigh at his words. You knew he was just trying to get you to leave him be for a little while. He needed a moment to think. You didn't blame him. You watched as Carol walked up the steps to welcome herself into the house. "Yeah, guess it is." You muttered, letting your hand fall to your side.

Rick reached his hand out in order to brush his fingers against yours. The both of you stare with a needy glint in both of your eyes. "Don't let me lose you, I can't," He nearly whispered, and you chuckled, reaching up to give his shoulder a light punch. "Mr. Grimes, you ain't losin' me anytime soon. Who else is going to make sure you don't do anything stupid?" You snickered, and he laughed back. Light and breathy while his head dipped down to look at the floor. "Yeah," you hummed, patting his bicep with a sigh. "I'll meet you here after I'm done. Maybe we can check the place out together, yeah?" He nodded, "Yeah, I'd like that." And with that, you were heading for the door. Walking off to the building you were instructed to go to in order to speak with Deanna.

The interview wouldn't take too long, and Rick knew that. You weren't the most open person when it came to discussing your past or present. Hell, Rick still had a lot that he didn't know about you. He opened up to you like a book, telling you all about his past. Yet, you didn't. It worried him that something may have happened to you, but truthfully. It was just due to the fact that you would rather focus on the present rather than the past.

Rick took the time that you were away to tidy up. Taking a shower, shaving. It was like looking at a whole new man when he looked in the mirror. He was excited to see your reaction when you got back. See how you would react to seeing him without his unruly beard. He loved it when you seemed to notice a change in him. It always seemed to ignite this flame deep within him. A flame that he thought died with Lori, but you proved that to be wrong.

The knock on the door is what grabbed him from his thoughts. Stealing him away from memories and fantasies with you. Nothing sexual, not right now anyways. Just thoughts of you and him, being together.

He opened the door with a cautious gaze. A hand resting where his knife was tucked into his holster. He could never be too sure these days. A friendly-sounding knock could turn into a shit show in no time flat. Yet, to his surprise, once he opened the door, he was met with a friendly face... A woman that he recognized from the streets when he left the interview with Deanna.

"Hi," She spoke. Voice light and sweet - nothing like yours, though. All that he offered was a low "Can I help you?" Which only seemed to make the woman smile more. She continued her spill. She offered hospitality and a haircut, and he turned it down. Shaking his head with a sigh. "Look, you don't know me," "But I'd like to," she spoke, "I just want to cut your hair. We don't have to talk." He hummed, thinking. "Just a trim, nothin' too short." He muttered before allowing her to enter the house.

"So, anyone special in your life?" Rick didn't answer, only shooting her a glare before sitting in the chair. "Right, just the cut.."

The door opened and his head lifted, eyes scanning the doorway until you slipped through the frame. "Honey, I'm home," You called out in a sing-song voice, and he smiled, a small chuckle escaping his throat. He knew the term of endearment was only a joke, but he couldn't help but ponder if you meant it. It was sure to fuel his fantasies later. "In the kitchen," he called back out to you. Jessie was thankfully finished, running her fingers through Rick's hair once more before pulling the apron off of him. "All done." She smiled, and he nodded, standing to his feet while thanking her. "What do I owe you?" He asked, and she shrugged, peeking over at you as you stepped into the kitchen. Looking her over with weary eyes. "Nothing, I told you, Rick, it's my welcome gift." She added, cleaning up her workspace before leaving. Shutting the door behind her with a 'click'.

You watched her leave, but your attention was quickly drawn back to Rick. A soft smile graced your lips. "You clean up nice," he smiled back, feeling that familiar warmth within himself. "Yeah, ya think so?" You nodded, leaning against the frame of the entrance to the kitchen. "Yeah, now you don't look old enough to be my dad." He scoffed, rolling his eyes with a sigh. "Oh shut it, I'm only eight years older than you." You snickered, shoving his shoulder playfully as he approached you. "Uh-huh, anyways, you ready for that walk around town, Mr. Clean?" He sighed once more, nodding his head. You were always so mouthy, but he wouldn't have it any other way.

The two of you left the house together. Rick followed close behind until the both of you were down off the porch and on the sidewalk. The man towering next to you, sturdy frame walking close beside you. Both of your steps are in sync with one another. As if he were still protecting you from whatever monsters could lurk around the corner. You always felt safe next to him.

"Deanna told me about a party they're throwing for us." Rick's knuckles brushed the back of your hand, electricity shooting through the both of you. "Oh yeah?" He asked, looking over at you with a brow raised. "Yeah, I think it'd be nice if we went. For a bit at least. Maybe we could get to know the people better." You commented, and Rick nodded with a hum.

He licked his lips as he thought. Sucking his bottom lip between his teeth. Chewing it a little before allowing it to slide back out. "Maybe," you let out a soft grunt at his words, Rick smiling a little at your noise. "Come on, it won't be that bad. You could be my date, and we could get to know them. Maybe if they have anything worth taking if we do leave." He liked every word that fell from your mouth, but hearing you talk about being his date? God, he felt sick to his stomach, but in the best way possible. A nervous and giddy way. Like the words excited him more than your fingers that would ever so lightly brush his.

"Fine, I'll go," he said, and you cheered. "Sweet! I hate drinking alone anyways," he raised a quizzical brow once more. "You? Drink? Please, I don't think you'd last a shot." You scoffed, "I'd like you to know that I could drink you under the table any day, Rick." You spoke, and the way you hissed out his name in such a teasing manner had the hairs on the back of his neck standing on end. A light flush crept up the sides of his neck that he would definitely blame on the heat if you questioned it. He despised how you affected him, yet, he couldn't get enough of you. He never could and probably never would be able to.

The days that passed weren't as horrible as Rick thought they would be. Everyone seemed to get along well, or so he hoped. He was trying, but he just couldn't feel like he fit in. If it weren't for you and his kids, he'd feel like a total outsider. Plus, Spencer Monroe was slowly pissing him off the more he saw him, especially the way he looked at you.

He hated to admit it, but he was jealous. He didn't worry about you going out with the guy. He could tell you only interacted with him to be nice, but he hated the way he still seemed to try and get closer to you. The closer he got, the more of an urge Rick had to throw him up against a wall and tell him to leave you alone. He didn't have the authority to do that, though. You weren't his to make that decision for. His luck, he'd be reading your emotions and body language wrong, and you would have liked Spencer if he did something so stupid.

He didn't dare take his jealousy out on you, though. If anything, it only made him clingier.

The night of the party he tried his best to look decent. Wearing a nice outfit with his hair styled like it used to be. Before the apocalypse hit. His ring was still snug on his finger, but it meant nothing to him. Other than a reminder of the man he used to be.

When you came out of the bathroom, his reaction was priceless. He glanced over at you, looking back to the door, before turning his head to quickly look back at you and what you were wearing. You looked so... "Gorgeous," he murmured, and you tilted your head, unable to hear what he said. "What was that?" you hummed, approaching him. "Shit, uhm, nothin', I was just sayin' you look nice. You clean up nice, too." He muttered, wetting his lips again before his eyes wandered down your body. Taking in everything that he saw. Before they reeled back up to your own. You smiled, but before you could say anything Rick was quick to intrude. "We should get goin', we're gonna be the last ones there," he chuckled, and you nodded, motioning to the door with his head before the both of you left.

Rick couldn't explain how nervous he felt walking beside you. He wasn't used to the formality of this all. It was weird, unusual, and intimidating for the former sheriff's Deputy. He was so used to being covered in dirt and blood, being unshaven while wearing week-old clothes, and you looking just as disheveled and homeless. He had completely forgotten what dates were like. He forgot what feeling clean and nice felt like. What it looked like, even.

"Rick," you called out, noticing how he stared off into the distance as the both of you walked closer and closer to the house. He was so good at getting lost in that head of his that you often had to call him back to earth. "Rick," you spoke, voice more stern. Finally drawing him out of his trance. "Yeah, I'm here," he sighed, and you frowned, "If you don't want to go, we can go back to the house." You added, stopping in front of the porch with the man that you grew to love. He shook his head, reaching out to grab your hand with his fingertips. "I want to go, though." He assured you with a gentle grin, motioning to the door. "Now come on, before I do decide to take you back to the house," He spoke, eyes darting down your figure with a hungry gaze before tugging you towards the door. You didn't even have time to react to his statement before the door was opened and people were greeting you from all around.

It was easy to get separated from Rick. People pulled you left and right in order to get to know more about you. How you survived that long, where you were from... If you and Rick were dating. The last question was only asked by one individual. The man standing in front of you that seemed to have you blocked from the door and Rick. "Why does it matter?" You asked, trying to keep up a friendly demeanor, but it was running short with the Monroe. "Just curious is all, trying to figure out who all is on the playing field." The analogy he used had you scoffing. Your eyebrows furrow while crossing your arms. "Excuse me?" He opened his mouth to explain, but quickly closed it, chuckling before holding his hands up to show he meant no harm. You hardly took it that way, though. The way he seemed to stare at your body more than he did you. It made you sick.

"I just meant you're very intriguing. I'd love to get to know you more." You nodded your head reluctantly, giving him a cautious gaze. You hardly doubted that, but you hated being rude when his parents were so kind to you all. "I may not be dating Rick, but I don't want a relationship with you, I know nothing about you. Why would I trust you?"

Even if you were blocked from Rick, he could still see parts of you past Spencer. Your crossed arms and defensive posture. It had him clenching the glass in his hands. Staring at the both of you with a clenched jaw. The conversation he was holding with Spencer's father was long gone, and Reg could tell. He wasn't about to interfere though. If anything, he was rooting for Rick when he saw the way his son continued to pester you. Maybe the former cop could teach a lesson or two to his son. He was an adult now, he could care for himself without his father's help.

"See, I want you to trust me. I wouldn't hurt you, I could take care of you. We all could," He spoke, reaching out to place a hand on your shoulder, to which you flinched away. "Don't fucking touch me," you snapped, going to shove past the man. A hiss left your throat when he grabbed your arm. Slight panic settled into your eyes as you jerked back towards him. "Wait!" "Let go of me you asshole!" You snapped, people turning heads to look towards the two of you. "I just want to talk," he started, but he was quickly shoved away from you.

"They said don't touch 'em!" Rick snapped, pressing Spencer up against the wall. Breathing down the man's face with his chest puffed out. A hand gripping tightly at the collar of his shirt. He'd been wanting to do this to him since he met the guy. His ego only infuriated him more and more with each passing day he saw him. You watched, unsure whether to feel amused and honored that Rick was still protecting you. Or worried and scared with the way he clenched onto Spencer and the murderous intent you caught in his eye before he had the man pinned.

"Hey! I wasn't doing anything wrong!" "You grabbed 'em, they wanted to leave, don't do that shit," He snarled, "They say leave 'em be, you leave 'em be," He snapped, and Spencer only glared. "Who gave you the right to come into my house and tell me what to do?" "Spencer!" Deanna was quick to interrupt the quarrel between the two men. "I didn't-" "Spencer, you need to respect the newcomer's boundaries just as well as they need to respect ours. I raised you better than this. If someone asks you to leave them alone, you leave them alone." Spencer was quick to look back to Rick. Glaring while waiting to be let go, but Rick wasn't backing down. Hands lightly trembling out of frustration.

"Rick," God, the things he could do to this guy right now. All he could see was red. What gave him the right to be touching you in the first place?

"Rick..." He could snap his neck just as easily as a baby. Bite out a chunk of his throat, dig his fingers into his eyes so he couldn't even look at you.

"Rick," You raised your voice a little, but not too much. Hands gently settling on his broad shoulders. He flinched, head jerking around before he caught sight of you. His gaze softened and his grip released from Spencer's shirt. "Sorry," he spoke to you, but his gaze was quick to land back on Spencer. Hardening once more. "If I so much as catch ya lookin' at them. I'll make ya wish ya never did," he snarled, and Spencer didn't move. Only falling more against the wall when Rick let him go.

Rick was quick to grab your hand, looking you over with worrisome eyes. "Are you?" "Rick, I'm fine, thank you." You smiled warmly, and he did the same. Motioning to the door before looking around at the others. Everyone's eyes were on both of you. "We're gonna head back to the house. I apologize for the scene," Reg shook his head, smiling over at Rick as he approached the both of you. "No need to apologize, Rick. I'd do the same for my Deanna too if some other guy was making her uncomfortable." His eyes drifted over to his son with a disappointed scowl.

You and Rick felt your bodies go warm at what he was inferring. His hand squeezed yours while parting his lips. "Oh, we're not-" "Sure you aren't, Rick," Reg added, motioning for the door. "How 'bout you both leave now? Get some rest, we can finish our conversation tomorrow." You both nodded, thanking the family before departing out the door.

Spencer didn't seem to be done with what he started with you and Rick, though. Moving for the door after everyone went back to what they were doing. No one was watching him - or so he thought. "I'd reckon you stay back unless you really wanna find out how elastic those balls of yours are. They gotta be pretty big, at least, if ya think you'd get away with a go at Ricky." A voice chimed, and Spencer looked up at the ginger that blocked his path. "From now on, you got a problem with Rick, you come to me, yer ol' pal Abraham, at your service," he muttered, leaning down a little in order to get more in the brunette's face. Spencer was definitely nervous now.

Rick's hand didn't leave yours the whole walk back to the house. The both of you walking in silence once more. It wasn't unusual for the man to grab your hand, or keep you this close when he was worried, but it felt so different right now. Like the tension between the both of you was stronger than ever. Able to cut it with a knife if either of you really wanted to try.

You finally let out a sigh, breaking the tension between the both of you. "So, what do you wanna do when we get back? I think Daryl's with Aaron and Eric." You added with a light shrug, and Rick smiled, giving your hand a light squeeze before glancing over at you. "Are you suggesting something?" It was your turn to feel flustered, looking over at Rick with raised brows before furrowing them. "What? No! Of course not, I wouldn't suggest sleeping with you like that," you scoffed, and he smiled even more in amusement. He'd blame his overly flirty attitude on the whiskey coursing his veins at the moment.

"How would you initiate it, then?" He asked, climbing up the porch with you. Not letting go of your hand even as he opened the door and led you inside. "Not like that," you added, eyes avoiding his icy blue stare. "Too shy to say, huh? Y've never been this bashful before." He added with a light chuckle, and you gulped. Keeping your gaze away from his. Until you couldn't help but peek at him when he moved his body directly in front of yours once the door was shut behind you two. "You wanna talk big games, Grimes, how would you initiate it?" You asked with a lopsided smirk, and it only caused his mischief to grow. He was just happy you were playing back with his flirting. Glad he was receiving back what he was giving you.

You took a step back towards the couch when he stalked towards you. Noticing the way his pupils dilated the closer he got to you. One of his hands held at your waist when the backs of your legs hit the sofa. "Like this," he muttered, letting go of your hand in order to grab the side of your face.

You held your breath the moment his lips met your own. He was soft at first, testing the waters before he cocked his head to deepen the kiss. You both felt like you were on fire. Bodies heated up as his hand on your hip pushed you down to the couch. Maneuvering you so he could climb on top of you. "Rick," you muttered against his lips and he let out a soft grunt. His tongue ran against the bottom of your lip before sucking it in his mouth to bite on your lower lip. "Rick, what if someone walks in," you spoke. You wanted to move him to the bedroom, but your hands portrayed a different story. Your fingers hooking on his belt loops, pulling his crotch down to meet your own. Soft hums leave both of your throats. "Shit, no one's coming'," He muttered, head dipping down to kiss your neck. Slowly making your worries leave as he hungrily continued his action.

His hips continued to rut against yours here and there. Soft noises escaped your lips as Rick ran his hands under the dress shirt you wore that was now untucked from your pants. Calloused hands mapped out every inch of skin he could feel. A low chuckle left his throat when you scrambled to undo the buttons of his shirt. "Need help with that?" He asked, kissing over a mark he left under your ear. A shudder running down your body at the feelings. "Please? I can't get these damn buttons," you breathed, and he nodded, leaning back after pressing a chaste kiss to your lips once more.

He took his time undoing the buttons on his shirt, until there was only four left.

Three... Your breathing sped up as you watched his body expose.

Two... You'd seen it so many times before, but it left you in awe each time.

One... Then it was shrugging off his shoulders. Rick smiled as he leaned back down to pull you in for another, loving, kiss. His hands roaming, your hands roaming. You were both so lost in each other, it was intoxicating.

His hips lurched forward once your fingers danced closer to his buckle. He was aching for you more than he ever had, and he prayed that you would undo his belt fast, or else he might have to do it for you. "Dad?" Carls voice caught you both out of your act. Rick shooting up from the couch, you doing the same.

Both of you were disheveled and it was obvious what both of you were up to. The boy's smile only grew as he looked between the both of you with a raised brow. "I was wondering when the two of you were going to do something," Carl added, Judith cooing in his arms. "Next time, maybe go to the bedroom though. I support this, but I don't want to see it.." He added with a cringe before walking past the both of you to head up the stairs to Judith's room to get her ready for bed. The little girl was already nearly asleep on his shoulder.

Rick stood there, dumbfounded. Staring where Carl used to be. "I told you the couch wasn't a good idea," you muttered, fixing your shirt to look more presentable if anyone else came home, but with Rick standing beside you shirtless. Anyone could put two and two together. "Yeah, I know you did," he muttered with a sigh. Leaning down to pick his shirt up before slipping it back over his shoulders, looking over at you with an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, I was just... Happy you reciprocated the kiss and all." He added with a light chuckle, and you chuckled back. "Rick, I'm not mad at you. I wouldn't button up your shirt if I was you, either." He furrowed his brow, watching as you stepped closer to him. Your hands resting on his chest. "We've still got the room option if you're willing to be quiet," you muttered, kissing the side of his throat. His eyes fluttered shut as he leaned his head back a little. "God, you drive me crazy, you know it?" "Rick, you've driven me crazy from the moment I met you back in Atlanta." You mumbled against his skin, and he smiled. "Now, room?" He nodded, "Room," grabbing your hand before leading you up to his bedroom. Both of you smiling like idiots.

[psychesetra]

NO REPOSTING OF MY ART PLEASE!!! ANY PLATFORM DONT DO THAT!!!!!!! REBLOGS ARE HIGHLY APPRECIATED THO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALSO CONSERVATIVES DNI!!!

study alt: @setra-studies

hiiii !! i literally just got tumblr yesterday and from how i remember old blogs i used to scroll on anonymously (w/o an acc) people have posts with info right...?

so this is mine :3

my user is psychesetra, but you guys can call me setra/stella or harti :)

i like (to):

• write original stories

• draw

• perhaps write fanfic

• read fanfic

• psychology (if it wasn't obvious haha)

• philosophy

• history (I AM SO ADDICTED TO HISTORY CLASS ‼️‼️‼️)

fandoms?

• op (one piece)

• dcst (dr. stone)

• hh (hazbin hotel)

• mp100 (mob psycho 100)

i do have knowledge of other fandoms, but i just don't participate / do a lot w them :)

tags if i got any?

• setrawrites - writings/stories :3

• setraquotes - quotes from my ocs/show

• setradraws - my art :D

• setrastories - either history stories, or stories that actually happened to me :3 probably won't post abt these often but when i do it's gonna be LLOOOOOONG (ph history tho >>>)

may add more, who knows?

like i mentioned earlier (and in the blog description i think) i write original stories! but the stories are actually more like mini-stories from a show i help produce! to explore our characters, i make oneshots in a google doc :) i will post them here too though !!! (esp the ones about my ocs bc they were originally a standalone story)

i might also occasionally post about fic recos (ofc only for the fandoms i listed) because ao3 is my life at this point

thanks for reading and bye bye !! see ya if you choose to read my writing or see my art !!

for the stories i write, for better context, this is the summary of the show they're from:

lily, a normal woman who had never really achieved anything amazing or world-shifting, dies in a car accident. panicking in her last moments about how she was never able to make her ambitious wishes come true, death gives her a choice -- die and reincarnate with no memory, like everyone else, or reincarnate into a fantastical world where she could attain her ambitions. choosing the latter, she is tossed into a war-torn world, and despite her lack of skills, she gathers a group of outcasts to help her stop the impending war.

masterlist

fanfics:

child of red - hh fanfic based on a prompt by @/6esiree

p1; rotten roses -

p2; pitter patter of petals falling -

the untitled luci fanfic i'm working on - :( nothing yet

the other untitled luci fic i'm working on - :( nothing yet

clashing universes / none-standalone stories:

NOT IN ORDER!!! THERE IS NO SPECIFIC ORDER IN WHICH YOU SHOULD READ SO THEY'RE NOT IN ORDER

and the tires came to a screech; pov lily

to my love unrequited;

bet a dollar, worth a mil

(i wish you weren't) not too tired to please; pov lily

please, please let me cry; pov setra

mother is (not) home; pov surna

familiarity; pov surna

standalone / random oneshots (not linked since i can't put links anymore D:) :

these are unrelated to clashing universes

and the sun went down

life's exp (the game) (STORY CONCEPT)

use, use, make yourself of use (poem)

rouge-stained letters (but is red not the color of love?)

[lilbittymonster]

holds up a very tired peace sign

Final roundup thoughts are that Dawntrail was a nice expansion. It wasn't amazing. It wasn't awful. I won't be up at night thinking about it. I won't be calling it the worst expansion ever. It was just....nice.

It told the story it wanted to tell very neatly. The writing has really bounced back from the nightmare of pacing issues that Endwalker had. The stakes were raised in a gradual and believable way. All it's loose threads were woven together neatly by the end. Wuk Lamat had a strong positive character arc without sacrificing her core personality. Koana had the necessary growth to realise that innovation and progress are not at odds with tradition. I think they compliment each other's weak points well.

Most of my nitpicking about the expansion lies in how the writers seemed to be trying to make a WoL x Wuk Lamat....thing happen, and I very much did not care for it At All. It's the same problem that I have with how the Exarch is written in ShB where we cannot say 'no' to him at any point. And frankly, being able to say 'no' is not something that would make the story come to a screeching halt. That's just lazy writing. I would have preferred if we were given dialogue options that gave us more agency in how we interacted with Wuk Lamat. Because the whole forced "we're family now :) you can call me Lamaty'i :)" was REALLY rubbing me the wrong way because, again, there was no way out! I could not at any point say "no, Wuk Lamat, I do not see you as family, you are assuming a level of relation here that just doesn't exist." Kitali wouold have flat out told her "no I'm not calling you that, we aren't family" and no amount of sad wet kitty eyes from Wuk Lamat could make her budge.

Kitali did not want to be here in the first place. She didn't sign on to be a participant in yet another political struggle. She was here with her husband on vacation and to keep an eye on the twins. That's it. And that's what she does for most of the early succession arc. She only gets called into the MSQ when the kidnapping happens, and she and Thancred are off doing their rogue shit together. She and Aymeric stick with the group until the end of the Valigarmanda trial, and after that she goes back to ignoring the political machinations.

It was Aymeric who dragged them along to Yak T'el, and Kitali wound up spending more time with the vipers than anything else. I haven't been bothered to actually level the job, but it's yet another dual wielding job to add to her repertoire, she'll be fine at viper day camp while the MSQ happens. And making sure Aymeric doesn't die of spice while they're there. He's gotten better but he is still very Ishgardian. Kitali would have been more interested in exploring the Ja Tiika forest and wallowing in her nostalgia for Rak'tika than anything else. They aren't there for the blessed siblings lore dump, but they tag along for the Skydeep Cenote dungeon as backup.

There is not nearly enough Estinien in this expansion for my tastes but at least I know what he's doing once he leaves Sunperch, so that makes my job easier.

I'm sure I'll waffle back and forth a bit on it by the time I actually get around to replaying it and writing out fic for it, and by the pace I'm going at it'll be several years from now, but it makes the most sense to me for Aymeric to remain behind in Tuliyollal following the attack. He isn't there for a lot of the Solution 9/Heritage Found stuff and they wouldn't see each other again til the final zone. He and Estinien would be sharing guard duty at the gate waiting for Kitali to come back through.

I kind of enjoyed not having Kitali be the main character of the expansion the same way she wasn't the main character in Stormblood. I really don't feel like it had to be the Warrior of Light with Wuk Lamat for the trials of succession arc. It just needed to be a strong adventurer. And even once the plot twists kicked up, we still weren't the main character, but being the WoL and our past experiences did end up being important enough to necessitate our presence. Compared to the previous two expansions, it was such a weight off Kitali's shoulders. Still, again with the "the whole world depends on me to save it" exhaustion, but lighter in comparison.

And Wuk Lamat ended up being the one to actually save it with the power of friendship. Love that for her. I'm glad that they kept her characterisation solid throughout the whole expansion.

I don't have any true investment in the expansion. I enjoyed it, but I'm more interested in the little bits and pieces about the future of interdimentional travel that they've been poking at since ShB ended. And if I'm being honest I think I'm starting to burn out on the game entirely. I've been meaning to replay some other games for a while now, and I think I need to take the time to do that and recharge.

I'll end this post with the best screenshot of the game.

He's gonna be a great dad some day.

[dribs-and-drabbles]

Thai BQL Favourites List Tag Game

Thank you for tagging me @feralmuskyscentedhoepran (I think other people have also tagged me but it's been a while and I don't remember, so apologies for that! - There's also the '9 favourite tv series which two people tagged me to do, so that's also on my to-do-at-some-point list!)

Favourite bl:

I mean, it's obvious if you've been following me for a while (but Be My Favourite is coming close!)

Favourite pairing:

Look. There are SO MANY good pairs, so instead of choosing between them I'm going to go a bit left-field and name a pairing who I can't wait to see together again because I ADORED them in 10 Years Ticket (not ql, I know, but they'll be in 23.5 so I think it counts).

Most underrated actor:

I know most people already know of his magnificence but I don't think he's properly led a show as a lead pair and he absolutely could. And I want to see it.

Favourite character:

I love so many for so many reasons but the depth of love that I have for Pran is hard to beat. He pined for so long and finally got his man. And I see so much of myself in him.

Favourite side character:

I'm going to cheat again and say a favourite side pairing. I loved these two, more than the mains in Golden Blood.

Favourite scene:

I mean, it has to be. It's impossible to express how much impact this scene had on me.

Favourite line:

I'm tired. Tired of pretending to hate you while your face has taken over my heart.

*chewing glass* There's something so unbelievably romantic about this line and how Pat is using it to confess that I can't articulate properly. It just hits me deep, deeeeeep in my feels. Watching it/listening to it the first time was an incredible moment. I don't think Pat could have said anything else here, nothing else could reach this level of perfection.

Most anticipated bl and why:

I was SO impressed by Jimmy in Vice Versa (compared to Bad Buddy), and I also really liked Sea in the series (my first time watching him in anything), so I'm excited to see how they've developed in Last Twilight. I'm also very excited to see what Aof brings next and especially because the show is dealing with a disability.

Healthiest relationship in a bl:

They love each other. They respect each other. They know each other so well. They communicate seriously when they need but also can tease and play with each other without damaging their relationship. They're there for each other when they need to be and will support each other above all else.

Most toxic relationship in a bl:

I don't even want to add a gif but, yeah, Tharntype probably. Or PrapaiSky (sorry LITA lovers).

Guilty pleasure series:

I'm not sure about the 'guilty' part (that implies I feel somewhat 'bad' liking it??) but maybe the guilt is loving the pain and angst that Vi and Mark go through.

Bonus! Most underrated series:

I'm finding it hard to think of one because most of the series I really like, a lot of other people also like... Oh, I know... What Zabb Man. It didn't seem like a lot of people watched it when it came out. It was a good little show, not outstanding like others, but decent anyway (I don't quite remember the end though...) and worth checking out.

Thanks for the tag Vi! This was fun to do (even if it took longer than I thought it would!). I think a lot of people have been tagged already so I'll choose a few who may not have from my recent notifications: @sparklyeyedhimbo @callipigio @incandescentflower @spicyvampire and @vegasandhishedgehog

[idunnowhattowriteheretbh]

Hello welcome to another part of "Amari is doing anything else but study" and today I thought about HIVE uniforms because I really don't want to study history skksksk

Also imma pray that tumblr is going to be nice to me lmao

Anyway

I was thinking about how the uniforms could look like and rn I can't remember if Captain said anything about em or nah

Cryo is inspired by Bear I guess? Brain not braining rn but I think it was inspo for the fluff because not everyone is capable of handling cold temperatures. Also it looks cool. +longer coat because that makes sure there's more warmth and I bet the fluff is soft

For medic I thought about giving the uniform Leanders colours but it looked a bit funky so I went with the default colours and added pink/red?? Not sure what kind of colour that is tbh. The bags could be filled with bandages n stuff amd I think it would be cool if medics had like some sort of vehicles to get to someone that got injured

Oh wait I forgot those arm patches noo-....I'm gonna leave this be-

Also now that I think about it it would be cool if the uniforms looked different in other parts of jobs like maybe scouts or something aaand I got another art idea- I'm gonna leave it for tomorrow because I'm too tired rn to draw it lmao Anyway

I also had a idea to like base of another uniforms from COL and Insomni and maybe Captain but for COL it's just different colours, with Insomni I didn't know how it would look like when I was drawing it and ofc rn as I'm typing it I get a idea for it could look like- and with Captain I decided to go nah cuz cmon it's Captain

And I may have been thinking about how the HIVE could be like real bee hives and I think it would be cool if there were bee themed guards n stuff because like there's a robot that Bear drew and also that backpack pollinator stuff (apolocheese that I'm not putting the link in here might add it later)

Now I'm not sure if I had more thoughts about this or nah....eh if I remember something imma add it later

But uh yea I had the uniforms idea for few months now I think but I was nervous about sharing it cuz anxiety I guess I dunno lol

Hmm might draw some more ideas tomorrow

Gotta speedrun tags now

[teaveetamer]

I am curious, I've been watching the discourse going on for a bit without getting involved and at this point I feel like I have to ask.

What is the desired result here? Why are you engaging in the discourse at all? Clearly this is not a discussion, so what do you gain from interacting at all?

(I will send this to several people, just out of curiosity)

Alright anon allow me to explain what's been going on with me on my end.

The year is 2019 (yes, we're doing this). FE3H has just come out. I play it and rather enjoy it actually. I've got a couple of ships that I'm into, some fanfic I want to write, etc.

I go onto Reddit to chat with people about the game. Now I don't really like Edelgard, but I'm chill, I'm open to discussing the game and getting alternate viewpoints. Initially it's more or less fine.

Then some posts start coming up. People start getting really aggressive about this. I'm trying to have a conversation, but it feels like their goal is just to shout me down. I get in arguments, I get in fights, I get misgendered, I get called a bigot, I get frustrated, I get ablest rhetoric spewed at me, and I waste my life.

Stop. Take a look at myself. I'm literally sitting here arguing about Edelgard von fucking Hresvelg for hours of my day. I'm annoyed, I'm irritated, I'm always in a bad mood. Ugh.

Now it's 2020, early times I think. I resolve to stop looking at Reddit so much with regard to this game. It's not worth the hassle and the frustration. I should be, like, out doing things and having fun not wasting my time arguing with a bunch of weirdos on the internet. I want to have fun again, not be angry. I delete the Reddit app from my phone and install a blocker on my web browsers, even.

Start using Tumblr for more than just shippy stuff, and find people who agree with me, who are saying the things I've been saying. I stop feeling crazy for liking the game the way I like it. I make a few posts on my main blog but you know what, I don't really want my main blog embroiled in this shit, though I want to add my voice to the conversation. So I make this side blog.

Make some posts. I get flooded with asks from other people about the game, saying they agree with me and they're thankful that they aren't the only ones who think the way I do. I think within like a month of existing this blog had double the posts of my main blog (which has existed since 2016, so for four years at that point), most of them from asks.

The blog was initially for me to vent and throw in my two cents here and there, but I figure I'll keep it around in regular use because people seem to be benefiting from it.

Early on I tried to establish a rule for myself that 1) I wasn't going to go looking in any main tags (e.g. the Edelgard or Edelgard Positive tags) for stuff to reblog or talk about, and 2) I wasn't going to go into any Edelgard specific spaces looking for stuff to talk about (e.g. r/Edelgard or even Dimitri-critical tags). However, anything maintagged that was looking for a fight (e.g. a Dimitri-critical post in the main Dimitri tag) was fair game.

I'm not perfect, but I did try to stick to that rule. I talked about things that happened on the main FE Sub or FEH sub. I did my best to encourage my anons to not go seeking out stuff to bring back to me from Edelgard spaces. After all, this blog was meant for venting and having my own personal space where I could talk about my views without getting accosted. I thought it would be petty for me to go bring back stuff from other places.

Moving into 2021, I was kind of done with 3H. I was still getting like dozens of asks a day about 3H discourse. I'd answer one and five more would pop up in their place. By now we're like, well beyond 3x or 4x the amount of posts I have on my main blog. I'm getting kind of tired of it. It's a lot of the same points over and over and over. We're in pandemic times, so I can't even walk away from it and do something else IRL for a while before coming back to it. I feel like I'm wasting my life again. I feel like I've said anything and everything I could have possibly said about the subject. I ask people to stop talking to me about Edelgard. Eventually, everyone mostly obliges.

I still chat about it here and there, but I'm chatting about other stuff too. This blog is still about venting just about venting about more than 3H. A lot more petty fandom shit in general.

Now we're in, like, 2022. I don't remember exactly, Pandemic Time makes some of this a bit of a blur. I notice a new kid on the block, doing basically what I'd noticed happening on Reddit. Going into the wrong tags. Picking fights. Posting things in the wrong tags. Picking fights.

I'm over it, I'm done, I don't want to deal with this shit anymore. I block the dude. Most people I know block the dude or ignore him. We figure he's new here, he just hasn't learned the etiquette.

He gets increasingly hostile. I'm not really paying that much attention, just getting info about it from the fringes. Again, we figure eventually he'll just go away if we ignore him.

Then Nilsh gets harassed off the platform.

My mutuals are getting increasingly hostile anons and combative reblogs.

At this point I'm relatively unaffected. I guess because I don't tag anything, so he didn't find it.

And you know what? I'm still like "he'll get bored. He'll leave eventually." We were all like "just ignore him, he'll leave eventually."

People try to explain tags to him. Try to help him curate his experience so he quits arguing with people who don't want to talk to him all the time.

Then Moonlitboar gets harassed off of the platform. They take the URL. He's bragging about having done it. He's spreading this vitriol to other platforms and convincing others to join in on the harassment.

And I'm like. Okay. This dude isn't leaving. This is what he wants. His goal isn't to talk about this game—his goal is to hurt us.

I unblock him and respond. We go back and forth. He stops... for a time.

Here's the thing. I didn't re-block him after that, and I didn't do that for a couple of reasons. First, because at this point I'm still hopeful that he's just unaware of what he's doing, and that he'll acknowledge how messed up it was and apologize. I'm all for second chances. The second, because he's dangerous and I'm worried that if I don't keep tabs on him, he's going to try to hurt me.

It's not long until he's doing the same shit again. He tries harassing BWIIDT, he tries harassing FantasyInvader, he tries harassing Ezra, he tries harassing RandomNameless, he tries harassing Emblemxeno, he tries harassing Gascon, he tries harassing people I've literally never even heard of. I keep calling him out, and he tries harassing me. He calls me hysterical, accuses me of acting like a victim. Tries to make me feel stupid and small by saying I don't have anything worth his attention to respond to.

(By the way dude, my point about that was that you were being misogynistic but treating discourse like it was only worth responding to if it came from a man. See, I noticed that you only liked to attack people you thought were cishet white men like yourself, even if we were saying basically the same things at times. The fact that you continue not "debunking" any of my posts doesn't upset me; it proves my point)

He blocks me. I can't say for certain why, but my bet is that he realized people were actually listening to what I had to say, and having a queer woman question the actions he purported to be for the benefit of queer women wasn't a great look for him.

He's still trying to harass me. He's taking screenshots, he's using my name, he's @ ing me. He's casually lying about me. He's using sexist rhetoric implying that I shouldn't be listened to because I'm just too ~in my feelings~ and he's the true victim of my hysterical victimized martyr complex (geez, you sure a a feminist ally for that one, aren't you?)

You know, I did actual research when one of my anons accused him of being a trump supporter and tried to lie about him? I burned an entire evening on that, because I didn't want to be spreading lies about people. Meanwhile he lets his anons casually and repeatedly misgender me without so much as a passing correction, and he hangs out with people who spread lies and slander accusing others of heinous crimes.

And you know what? If I knew it was going to be like this? I'd still waste that evening and correct that anon. It's not about getting a petty win or convincing people he's a bad person for me. It's about being respected.

So to get back to your question. Why am I doing this? Because I have to. Because I know that if I don't he's going to hurt someone else, just like how he hurt Nilsh and Moonlitboar. The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior, after all. We ignored him and he didn't leave, so now we have to say something.

What's the desired result? I want to be respected, like I've tried to respect them for almost the entirety of this blog's existence. I want my boundaries acknowledged. I want him to stop hurting people for no other reason than to hurt them, because they don't agree with him.

When will I stop? When he stops.

[hotluncheddie]

20 Questions For Writers!

Tagged by @puppy-steve, @scoops-aboy86 and @steviewashere ty ty !!! :3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

40!!!

2. What's your total AO3 word count

78,658 which is honestly insane to me - it still feels unbelievable when I write like 1000 words comfortably.

(For a long time writing was something I could do but had to do, never wanted to do or enjoyed. So, I never ever imagined it being my main hobby - I honestly get insecure that everything I write is so short, especially compared to how people seem to bang out 10,000w like it's nothing)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Steddie!!!!! so Stranger Things

And I have dabbled in Fargo for Gator Tillman :) Pillow

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Tiny Green Shorts 

Seasons change, but people don't. 

Stimming

Wherever you go, thats where I am.

unmasking 

(Two old ones but the fact that both autistic Steve fic's are on there makes me SO happy!!)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yesssssssss but sometimes I really don't know what to say other than 'thank you' - which feels lame, but I love comments so I always answer

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

It's more of a drabble but maybe thats when boys kiss ? I wrote it with the idea of the end being hopeful, but I had a couple comments and it's very easy to read it in a more angsty way - basically if you read it with Eddie dying like canon, then it becomes pretty sad

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

uh - all of them

But gonna go with Softly just because the whole thing is super soft - ooey gooey horny daddy kink my kryptonite

8. Do you get hate on fics?

nah

One day I probably will however - my first cyber bully :]

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

YA!! - all kinda - lots of freak kinks in this house - and a lot of love

I just think d/s is fun, you can play with so many kinks within the dynamic and its just cool and hot. And then you add established relationship on top, so like, that knowledge and love and like just being into stuff because your partner is - so good!

I explored a lot of kinks in my SubEddieWeek and definitely want to do more - need to write some sub Steve!

10. Do you write crossovers?

No but I do have notes for a Gator Tillman / Steddie fic so might write that at some point...

And have been dabbling with my lovely 🐶anon in some Gator Tillman / Kurt Kunkle ideas - as silly as that is lol - it's fun! - dunno if it'll ever turn into a fic though

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Don't think so!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Don't think so! But would not be against it!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Ye kinda!!! me and @scoops-aboy86 have our Office AU series :)

Oh and the Milk fic here on tumblr heheh - its a classic

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Steddie!!!!

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you will?

Ugh my "Steve has known he’s bi for years and is more knowledgeable than Eddie. Eddie is queer in a kinda vague nebulous way and it stresses him out sometimes. Bruce Springsteen born in the USA album. Coming of age, dealing with change."

I love it and I do want to write more of it but it just doesn't have the sauce yet - haven't quite figured it all out. What's it's purpose you know? Or figured out how to use that album effectively for like, themes and stuff

16. What are your writing strengths?

Uh well, right in this moment NOTHING bc I feel EMO and I'm too TIRED to write ANYTHING...

But I am happy with the sentence structure in my autistic Steve fic's - I tried to use very short and very long sentences to help express his thought processes when he's in different emotional states, and think I did it, effectively ?

Also I sometimes write stuff only bc I think it's funny - idk if it's funny for anyone else but I guess it means I have a lot of variety in my content... and silliness... which is good... (?)

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Never knowing how much information to give. Sometimes i like to keep is sparse to keep the vibe going, like the tension or emotion. But sometimes I think I miss out on key descriptions and added context without noticing. Loosing more information about place and sometimes key movement and descriptions of the characters. What I lack is ✨world building✨

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I only speak little baby English so probably wouldn't do it personally - I have, like, nothing against it though?

19. First fandom you wrote for?

This one!!!!!

20. Favorite fic you've written?

hmmmmmm... I'm gonna go with three just because I wrote them all pretty recently and think they show some improvement, like I was able to express what i wanted in them. So;

Hug - Autistic Eddie my love - I like the pacing a the structure in this, I think I maybe do actually do some world building here, which gives nice context to this Eddie and where he is mentally in the moment of his meltdown.

Love in a safety pin - I think it's one of my favourite feedist kink fic's that I've written, just because I think it's a good mix of the kink and their developing relationship. Like it's not all just horny, there's plot and character development, along with being hot. Like, I think it does a good job of showing what the kink can be, because it maybe gets a bad rap. It's a lot of different things, and it's hot when its pleasurable for both parties, and it's still just people with the same emotions as any other kinks, still pining, still insecurity... ya idk :)

Bi Freak - I just really wanted to do a good degradation kink, like some straight masochism you know? And I think I did an okay job. Also this is a dom Steve that I think is very actually fitting for the character but I haven't really read before, so, I wanted to explore that too.

-

Not gonna tag bc I don't have the capacity too right now but i'm seriously not joking if you want to do this - here, you're tagged.

Tag me and I WILL shout in the comments about it