#i've never been to a sermon in my entire life

[utilitycaster]

Is there any like. Real lore based reasons ppl treat pelor as an analogue for the Big Honcho God or is that a false connection ppl who are already deadset on projecting their religious trauma with monotheistic Christian god onto fantasy pantheon make because something something "Father" and/or "Sun deity"

I think the fact that the people buying up the land in and around Hearthdell and putting in temples were doing so in the name of the Dawnfather is a big factor. It's quite honestly the only justified reason, but this was also extremely present before there was even a hint of that plot. Nothing with regards to his interactions with Deanna is anything untoward; he is arrogant but if you can't appreciate arrogant characters then skill issue; and this post (and OPs excellent reblog down the chain) covers his portrayal in Campaign 1 better than I could.

Otherwise? I'm not Christian and never have been, so personally Jesus Portrayals do nothing for me because that guy is way too nice, honestly, and it weirds me out. So while I suspect the hatred of Pelor is in part a projection of negative feelings about Christianity, for a number of reasons, particularly the fact that almost all the people dead set against him and other gods write arguments that sound like they learned rhetoric exclusively from fire-and-brimstone sermons, down to the presupposing their conclusions as part of the initial premise (they call it preaching to the choir for a reason) and the almost exclusive reliance on appeals to emotion in the absence of any logic, I do not want to say so definitively. I cannot say for sure why people came in to Campaign 3 deciding the gods had three strikes against them already and then proceeded to put on a Church Lady act of being Shocked and Sickened when people looked at the collapsed heap of unsupported presumptions they called an argument and said "no thanks" but they do. It is rather tedious.

I don't want to attribute to disingenuousness and a secret taste for the boot provided the "correct" people are wearing it what I think (and hope) is just being really, really, really stupid and incapable of considering perspectives other than one's own (though both of those can very easily be swayed towards dangerous beliefs), but there's one "argument" against the gods that I've mulled over since I first saw it. It boiled down to the idea that it was unjust for some people to have powers and some to not, and was phrased something like "if my friend got spells from their god and I didn't, I'd want to kill the gods" and that sounds like an abjectly miserable experience. I don't want to rest my argument entirely on emotion, though I'm trying to counter one resting entirely on emotion and it's pretty difficult, but man. To see your friend put in effort (perhaps not as concrete and material an effort as that of a wizard, but still an effort) and get something for it and feel only jealousy because you didn't get the same? Like not just a twinge of jealousy, which we all get, but to be so full of it as to be moved to violence? To have no joy for one's friends? That sounds like a life that would suck ass.

I think a lot of the Prime Deities in Exandrian lore, Pelor very much included (and he is perhaps the like...least nice about it, and some people get REALLY weird about a Lack of Uwu Soft Gentle Niceness even though as previously discussed I find it a turn-off) are very much about hope, and making good faith attempts, and responsibility and obligation to others, and keeping one's promises and I think that message sits very ill with people who would prefer a narrative of despair and nihilism. Ultimately that's kind of the split between the Primes and Betrayers that we see in Downfall. I think that while much of the Pelor hate is just a convenient scapegoat for a general hatred of all the gods (which is why I get general in the above paragraphs), some people hate Pelor, essentially, the way one hates sunny days when one is extremely depressed, and see them as a deliberate, cruel, and targeted affront when the sun is simply a thing that shines independently of one's mood.

[aishangotome]

Alfons Sylvatica: [Mad Love] Chapter 24

Chapter 23

♡———♡

(Happiness that will one day turn to tragedy…)

(What’s the point of giving such a thing?)

The warmer the memories, the greater the disappointment at their loss.

It is precisely because there is such a thing as love that we despair when we lose it.

(Wouldn’t it be much more accurate to say that I loved her properly if I were killed here and now?)

Before we make more memories.

Before I devour her love any further.

Alfons: ...............

I put my black gloves back on and confront the man aiming a gun.

"Go ahead, hero of justice. Try shooting me."

I tried to spit those words out, but---,

**flashback**

Kate: No… Please don't die.

Kate: My love, my feelings, they're still…

Kate: Please don't let them become an illusion…

**flashback over**

Alfons: ----......

The words caught in my throat.

(... This is no good.)

My past self, who threw my life away in front of her, would laugh at me now.

I couldn't even bring myself to lie and say, "Go ahead and kill me."

(I'm different from those adults. Because I have love.)

The "love" I whisper is always a lie.

I am an illusion, who you may never see again, who you may never meet again.

Even so, "there may be a moment of salvation."

That kind of hope is necessary to crawl through this bleak reality.

... Shallow, pitiful, and yet, lovely, isn't it?

I whispered empty words of love and sought only a convenient relationship without love.

I was about to disappear without loving or being loved—-.

(—You ruined everything.)

Kate: Why do you reject me like this, when all I do is love you…?

(You appeared before me,)

(and foolishly, directly, tried to shower me with love.)

My body is heavy with the love I've consumed,

and I can no longer simply vanish like an illusion.

I still don't know if we can love each other properly.

Just then---,

Kate: Put the gun down—!

Her trembling voice fell into the darkness of the night.

Alfons: ....!

Over the man's shoulder, he could see Kate aiming a gun.

Kate: If you move, I'll shoot.

(... What are you doing?)

Before he could be surprised, he was exasperated.

(Are you going to become a murderer for me?)

(If I die, you'll forget who you pulled the trigger for.)

(Only guilt will remain in your hands.)

Even though you know you might be thrown into the abyss someday, how can you love so openly and straightforwardly?

Frankly, I don't understand.

(Come to think of it, you've always been like this.)

(So serious, so stubborn, so straightforward.)

--That's why I want you.

I want you to keep looking at me straight on.

(So much that it burns into my retina.)

(Even if I die and everyone in the world forgets me--I want you to remember me vividly.)

If proper love doesn't seek anything in return, then what's nesting in my heart must be something else entirely.

(But... love doesn't need anything in return, right?)

I don't believe in those useless sermons I've heard somewhere, but seeing her throw herself into love like this, I can't help but believe.

I still don't know if I can love her properly.

(Love doesn't seek anything in return... if that's true,)

(then it's okay if I devour that proper love and drive you crazy, right?)

-

(Back to Kate's POV)

Kate: I'll go buy something. Wait here for a bit.

Alfons muttered that he was a little hungry, and I wanted to eat something delicious with him,

so I ran alone through the night to a sweets shop that was open late.

(I hope Alfons likes it too.)

(Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever asked him about his taste preferences.)

The bag was filled with the sweet smell of crumbly fudge that melts in your mouth, cupcakes with cream, and the shop's popular sweets.

(I didn't buy it now because it's hard to eat, but the apple crumble cake at that shop is also exquisite.)

(I want Alfons to try it someday.)

I'll invite him to the café next time.

As I smiled at the thought, I saw a figure in the place where I had parted with Alfons.

Kate: Al---, .....?

(There's someone else there...?)

The paper bag I was carrying fell onto the cobblestones at my feet.

The sound seemed strangely distant.

--A gun was pointed at Alfons.

Kate: …… –– !!

The moment I understood, the scene that had seemed like slow motion flashed back.

His body slowly tilting.

The memory of his shoulder collapsing on the floor, stained with blood, came back to me, and fear rose from the pit of my stomach.

(Alfons …… !)

My fingers trembled with agitation, but I managed to move them and fumble for the leg holster under my skirt.

(Who was that—no.)

(More importantly, I have to save Alfons now ……!)

Man: Then I'll kill you--and we'll become justice!

Alfons: .................

I shivered, not because I felt murderous intent from the man's back—

but because the way Alfons was looking at him with a very calm expression told me that even this was commonplace.

This must be the price of their creed of "fighting evil with evil."

If I want to stay by his side, this is the reality I can't turn away from.

And for me, who doesn't want him to disappear yet—,

I have no choice but to block the murderous intent directed at him.

Kate: Put the gun down—!

Man: ––Eh !?

I pulled my gun from the holster and aimed it from behind.

Kate: If you move, I'll shoot.

Man: Tsk…!

The man froze, then slowly lowered the arm that was holding the gun.

(... Good, it looks like I won't have to shoot.)

I relaxed a little.

At that moment—the man suddenly turned around.

Kate: ---Huh!?

The muzzle of the gun was pointed straight at me.

(No...!)

I instinctively tried to squeeze the trigger without even aiming,

Immediately after---.

Man: Ugh …… gah …… !!

A red, wet blade protruded from the center of the man's chest.

Kate: Ah …… Alfons ……

Alfons: Oops, my bad. I accidentally created a grotesque object in such a conspicuous place.

When the saber was pulled out of his body, the man collapsed on the spot.

Alfons: I need to ask Victor to clean this up as soon as possible.

Kate: ……!

He quickly sheathed his blood-soaked saber, surely to keep me from seeing it.

Exasperation and affection washed over me at his thoroughness in trying to shield me from reality.

Kate: Alfons, are you... alright?

Alfons: Of course, as you can see.

He spread his arms wide, then suddenly gave me a reproachful look.

Alfons: That aside. You were about to shoot randomly, weren't you, Kate?

Alfons: What if the trajectory had been off or the bullet had gone through and hit me?

--CHOICES--

I felt like I wouldn't hit you

I practiced, so I thought it'd be okay

I didn't have time to think

----------------

Kate: …… I didn't have time to think that far ahead.

Alfons: Oh my, how scary.

Footsteps approached, and the gun was taken from my palm.

Alfons' hand gently enveloped my empty hand.

Alfons: …… Hey, Kate.

Alfons: Please use the gun only to protect yourself, not for me.

Alfons: I'd rather not be accidentally shot by you.

Alfons: …… Besides, I've learned that I can't die so easily anymore.

The whisper echoed sweetly in my ears as "truth" –

Kate: .....!

The fear and tension I had felt a moment ago suddenly overflowed in my chest, and I collapsed on the spot.

Alfons: Oops.

The hand that had been supporting me now wrapped around my waist.

Clinging to him with my weakened hand, I raised my head and met his gaze directly.

Kate: You absolutely promise...?

"It's not so easy to die"...... It's true, that's what Alfons said.

(But, when he rushed to my side just now......)

For a moment, it seemed as if Alfons had given up on living.

With his eyes wide open, if I wasn't there by his side, holding his hand,

He would easily sway between life and death again –

Kate: You absolutely, absolutely, must not die somewhere I don't know......

Gripping his chest tightly, his eyes fell to my hand – and he laughed.

Alfons: Well, as you've seen, I'm often in life-or-death situations, so "absolutely" is difficult, but I'll do my best.

He answered so nonchalantly and cheerfully that I got angry.

Kate: This is where you're supposed to say "absolutely," even if it's a lie......

Alfons: Hehe, you're right. How unlike me, to accidentally tell the truth.

Alfons: I even missed a perfect chance to die naturally and saved you.

Alfons: Can't you trust me for the time being?

"For the time being" is too uncertain a time frame to be satisfied with.

At the very least, I want compensation for the strain on my heart when I saw Alfons being held at gunpoint and my breath almost stopped.

Kate: ......Next year.

Kate: If you promise to go to the pie-throwing festival with me next year, I'll believe you......

Alfons: .....

Alfons: Heh...... Ahaha! You're really such a fool, aren't you?

Kate: You won't promise?

Alfons: Yes, yes, I will. Let's get messy together next year too.

But the trouble is, promising next year makes me want to be with you even more.

Kate: ......What about the year after next?

Alfons: Well, you see, we can promise that next year if we're still alive, right?

Kate: You're saying things that make me uneasy again......

Alfons: Hehe...... I can't help it, I want to see that pouting face.

Kate: ......

He poked my lips, and the corners of my mouth tingled.

Even if reality is a cruel darkness.

His gray eyes reflect me.

Just that makes me believe that the light of hope continues to shine.

Alfons: Well then...... I think I've come to somewhat understand this "proper love" you speak of.

Alfons: ......Shouldn't we end this wholesome date about now?

-

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Mad Love Chapter 24 Premium Story

If you’d like to support my translations, feel free to buy me a coffee here! :)

[explosionshark]

Your turn!

It's halfway through the year! Got any favorite albums/books/tv shows/whatever to recommend?

thanks to you @badwolfwho1 who both asked me!

music:

right off the top i'm gonna recommend 3 pop albums bc i almost never have this many TO recommend. but tei shi's valerie, empress of's for your consideration, and shygirl's club shy EP have all been on constant repeat for me this year.

big year for metal also - in particular crypt sermon, job for a cowboy, darkest hour, gatecreeper, aborted and tzompantli were all incredible. i feel like between seeing them live and the release of cure, this is the first time erra has really clicked for me and i'm loving it.

for post-hardcore i've loved the debut LPs by with sails aheads and your ghost in glass. the EP lonely people by love rarely was on repeat for me for weeks also - really great stuff.

i got heaven by mannequin pussy slaps too. and i also really, really want to recommend you could do it tonight by couch slut - if you love the queasy, depraved noise that chat pile make, you absolutely should be listening to couch slut.

i threw a couple little playlists together to roundup some of my faves:

(extended version here)

honorable mention: as was really apparent from my charts this year, i spent A LOT of time listening to the saosin s/t again. but also got really back into grouper this year - especially her 2021 album shade, which i missed entirely when it came out.

books:

okay for music i focused mostly on 2024 releases but for books i won't be so strict.

shirley jackson: a rather haunted life by ruth franklin was REALLY good and provided a lot of great insight into jackson's work and also just had some really interesting history in it. really enjoyed it.

hit so hard by patty schemel a rock music and addiction memoir by the drummer of Hole. very dark and upsetting at points, but compelling. was very illuminating re: the 90s seattle music scene and the drug culture around it, provided a lot of context and detail to some stuff i thought i already knew about. really great stuff.

penance by eliza clark - this is a fake true crime book that REALLY got under my skin. it's a meta commentary on true crime as a fandom and an industry and the exploitation inherent in it. it's a mirror to make you stare at your own internal biases. it's SO fucking 2014 tumblr. i've gotten like three other people to read it and they all went insane like me. highly recommended.

hex by thomas olde heuvelt - very late to the party on this one but i loved it. translated AND localized from dutch, with very interesting results. almost goofy to start and ends up totally bleak. i adored it.

magic for beginners and white cat, black dog by kelly link - REALLY falling in love with kelly link this year. read these two and currently re-reading stranger things happen and i just adore her style. weird but SO heartfelt, surreal and dreamy, as often horrifying as it is sweet. she's so talented, i'm really excited to read the book of love later this year.

between two fires by christopher buehlman - FINALLY read this and i loved it. absolutely deserves the hype. kinda wild that dark ages horror isn't more of a thing? i re-read buehlman's the blacktongue thief too and really loved it, definitely cemented it as one of my favorite fantasy books. i'm reading the daughters' war now and enjoying it a lot.

i also re-read the golden enclaves by naomi novik and had such a great time with it.

tv shows:

finished my buffy re-watch! been watching a ton of xena with @holdsteady and @nataliving this year too - we just finished s3 and it was insane and i loved it soooo much.

i watched under the bridge and thought it was very good, but i'd recommend people learn a little about the real reena virk case before engaging.

hacks season 3 was INSANE it made me crazy i loved it so much.

haven't watched much tv aside from that!

[lulu2992]

I've been doing an introspective RP with a friend and I've become very attached to Deputy Hudson. It feels like the game doesn't actually give us much info about her, since you have to dig through files and triggering her dialogue naturally is somewhat difficult.

Said friend recalls hearing a piece of dialogue somewhere suggesting or flat-out stating that John didn't actually "do much" to torture her. That she was even allowed to walk the halls of the gate and that her fear/isolation were what took the biggest toll. That John did torture her violently at least once, (the audio of which was turned into a sermon that you can hear at outposts), but other than that he mostly stuck to threats.

I was wondering if you had any thoughts on this? If you've heard the files or had any ideas about the methods of torture used. Just trying to paint a picture, since she and Staci deserve more justice than what they got.

We indeed don’t know a lot about Joey Hudson… Apparently, she and Pratt were originally supposed to be Guns for Hire, which probably explains why they have more combat lines than they need. However, I don’t remember anyone in the game saying that she was (relatively) well-treated or free in John’s Gate.

While she’s in the bunker, the Resistance and civilians are worried and hope she will be rescued soon. They say that she’s tough, but they think it’s not necessarily a good thing because “John loves a challenge”. As for cultists, one comments that Hudson is one of John’s “special projects” and another that he spends a lot of time with her. I suppose it’s because she was stubborn and therefore hard to break, so she required more “work”, but also because, as the Junior Deputy’s partner, she was bait. If they didn’t want to come for him, John hoped they’d at least want to come for her.

I believe she did receive “special treatment”, in a way, but that mostly included being broadcasted across the entire valley either looking in danger or screaming in pain so her colleague would want to save her. John often threatened to hurt her in retaliation, but in the end, I don’t know if she was tortured significantly more than the other captives. That’s clearly what he wanted the Deputy to believe, though.

I looked through oasisstrings and found what Hudson says about her time in John’s Gate:

That hell hole of a bunker -- I was trapped in it but my mind was somewhere else. I sorta just went through the motions, gliding along… Like you would in a nightmare. It never ended. I can't remember all of it… Just flashes… I begged people for help, but they just… smiled. I've never been around that many Peggies in one place, and every single one of them just smiling.

When you escaped the bunker… John didn't say it… but you could see it in his face. Failure. Things got worse from there… Like he was trying to make up for something. Prove to his brother he could… I never thought I'd make it out of there.

This is all surreal to me – being alive I mean. When I was in that bunker, all I could think about was the ways I would die. Think about who I was leaving behind. How every moment in my life came together and drove me to this point – this… end… You prepare yourself to die, because everything is telling you you're about to… But I'm not, and I just feel… numb.

She doesn’t talk about being able to walk freely in the bunker, so I’m not sure she (or any other hostage, for that matter) was allowed to do it. In comparison, it seems Pratt had more freedom, in the sense that he could walk around a bit in St. Francis and wasn’t always in a cage. That said, his mind, like the Marshal’s, wasn’t free at all…

As for what exactly John does to people, it’s unclear because the game doesn’t really give details, and neither do the people who had to Confess or say “yes” to him. What’s certain is that they still seem affected by what happened, ashamed of what he managed to make them say (even Jerome), and that most of them don’t want to talk about it.

In the Confession room, there’s a blowtorch…

…but how (or if) it was used, we don’t know. And it appears his toolbox only contains a screwdriver, a tattoo gun, and a stapler.

According to Sharky, John “knows all these pressure points and can make you feel pain beyond anything you ever imagined”. Another NPC, who Confessed, says he “messes with your head, asks you questions, makes you say shit you don’t wanna be saying”, but then refuses to elaborate. John knows how to hurt people physically, but it seems he doesn’t always need to do it. Sometimes, as we saw when he made Nick say “yes”, a few well-chosen words are just as effective, if not more.

Narratively speaking, I think it was a good idea not to tell us what John does or says to make people comply so easily. That, plus the fact that those who Confessed are too uncomfortable to talk about their experience, makes him an impactful villain. Players can only guess what his methods are and, given the circumstances, tend to imagine the worst. How exactly he tortures people, physically or psychologically, is a mystery, and that makes him look more threatening.

[lucifersimp]

Lucifer Morningstar - favorite quotes

When he's TiredTM

"They talk of me going around buying souls, like a fishwife come market day, never stopping to ask themselves why. I need no souls. And how can anyone own a soul? No. They belong to themselves … they just hate to face up to it." :)

"Why do they blame me for all their little failings? They use my name as if I spent my entire day sitting on their shoulders, forcing them to commit acts they would otherwise find repulsive. 'The Devil made me do it.' I have never made any one of them do anything. Never. They live their own tiny lives. I do not live their lives for them." :))

"A message written in blood. Everyone involved in this drama seems compelled to overact." 😒

"Been there, Remiel. Done that, wore the tee-shirt, ate the burger, bought the original cast album, choreographed the legions of the damned and orchestrated the screaming…"

(Amenadiel: "I am told that you will name your price.") Lucifer: "That I may name my price or that I will name it?" (Amenadiel: "Will.") Lucifer: "You'd think part of being omniscient would be knowing when to stop." 😑

When he reminisces:

"I had the hubris originally to regard myself as a collaborator, as a co-author. Very rapidly I found myself reduced to the status of character, following something of a disagreement in the fundamental direction of the Creation."

"You use the word "Infinity" very glibly.... Have you ever been there? Time and space are extensions of the mind, the will. Which means that infinity is a purely local phenomenon. You can turn over a stone and find it crawling there. Or you can make it yourself out of whatever materials are at hand."

When he means business

"I'm the paid agent of the Triune Godhead, The King of Heaven. I will not relent. Unless you want to make me a substantially higher offer." ;-) ;-) ;-)

"I am the Resurrection, and the Life. In this instance at least."

"I am my own army. A million times more numerous than yours."

"You'll have to rise above your individual hatreds and mistrusts. Otherwise you will die. Or else you'll live, but come back unsuccessful. In which case I'll kill most of you myself. Good luck." :D

When he can't help being a smartass

[to Michael] "I always think of you when I think of harps. They make a sweet sound while their own internal stresses tear them apart in slow motion."

[Remiel: "You come here with all your old arrogance – like a visiting head of state, when the truth is you've evaded your responsibilities. You resigned. You resigned, Lucifer." 💢 ] Lucifer: "Your grasp of current affairs is as keen as ever." 👏👏

[Jill Presto: "Well … just speaking for myself … and I'm going out on a limb here … I'd like to say that you're an arrogant, ungrateful son of a bitch on a permanent power trip." 😒] Lucifer: "Ha! Excellent. Accurate on all counts." 😈

Michael: "Was it not Buddha who heard a sermon in the thunder?" Lucifer: "Actually, it is in the Upanishads, but I applaud your ecumenical impulse." 🤓 Michael: "And the words the thunder said were Datta, Dayadvam, Damyata. Give, sympathize and control. I've always thought of that as one commandment rather than three." Lucifer: "Why do I feel that this particular sermon is being preached at me? I can do control. Nobody is good at everything." 🤷 Lucifer: [later] "A sermon in the thunder, Michael? Thunder only has one thing to say: it tells us how close the storm is."

[Bergelmir: "You've done a terrible thing, Morningstar. I still believe that you'll be brought to pay for it. One way or another."] Lucifer: "Well, belief is meant to be a great consolation. Take it with you when you go" :3

[God: "You've been unhappy because you've desired things that cannot be." ^^] Lucifer: "That's what desire is. The need for what we can't have. The need for what's readily available is called greed." 🙃

Amenadiel has poured a glass of brandy across the table and set it alight] Lucifer: "That's an eighty year-old Janneau Armagnac. If I'd known you were going to waste it on melodrama, I would have given you the '78." 🙄🙄 Amenadiel: The World is on fire, Lucifer Morningstar. I wanted to make that point forcefully. Otherwise we could squander the evening in stale repartee. Lucifer: I've no desire to trespass on your evening at all, Amenadiel. I'm sure there are many places where your company would be almost welcome.

When someone puts him in his place

Lucifer: "The million lords of hell stand arrayed about you. Tell us, why we should let you leave? Helmet or no, you have no power here — what power have dreams in Hell?" Dream: "You say I have no power? Perhaps you speak truly. But — you say that dreams have no power here? Tell me, Lucifer Morningstar... Ask yourselves, all of you, what power would Hell have if those here imprisoned were not able to dream of Heaven?"

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

By: Ryan Burge

Published: Apr 29, 2024

Sometimes I write a piece and a few weeks later I completely forget that I published it. I am not going to point out any specific examples on this Substack, but rest assured there are numerous occurrences where I've Googled an answer to a question and stumbled upon an article that I wrote at some point in my career, only to have forgotten about it entirely. As one of my homiletics professors said during my undergraduate studies, "not all sermons can be home runs." The same goes for public writing, I suppose.

But there are some little threads that I have exposed in earlier work that I just can’t shake. Sometimes, this is a result of giving a talk that goes really well and drives a lively Q&A, which then gets my mind spinning with possibilities. This was certainly the case when I was at Asbury University a few weeks ago, presenting some graphs from two posts that have run on Graphs about Religion.

They both circle around this idea that I have been exploring for a while—that religion doesn’t mean what most people think it means. Increasingly, it’s not some kind of theological ascent where people come to a clear understanding of Jesus, Mohammad, nirvana, etc. I just don’t think that’s how religion works in 21st-century American life. Instead, I believe that religion has been reduced to little more than a tribal marker, much in the same way that people say they are a fan of the Yankees, or they are Irish, or graduated from Stanford. It’s a way to create an "us vs. them" dynamic.

But there’s more evidence for this theory, too. There’s an increasing number of people who say that they are evangelical, yet they go to church less than once a year. Or, there’s a growing phenomenon of non-Christian faith groups like Jews, Muslims, and Buddhists who will tell survey administrators that they too are evangelicals. As I have shown, it’s pretty easy to predict why this is happening—it’s much more prominent among Republican non-Christians than among Democrats. Religion is not about a sense of the Divine; it’s about what tribe you associate with and what kind of cable news you consume.

So, consider this another entry into that larger discourse. This time I wanted to zero in on a small subset of people that I just can’t stop thinking about. Here’s the setup:

There are a handful of religion questions on mainstream surveys. One is, “How important is religion in your life?” Responses range from "not at all important" to "very important." They are also asked, “aside from weddings and funerals, how often do you attend religious services?” with response options that go from "never" to "more than once a week." Let me just show you how the sample breaks down on these two metrics in a heatmap.

It should come as little surprise that the top left is sparse. Not a ton of people are high attenders but don’t think that religion is very important. That would be completely nonsensical. The most populated square is the bottom left—those who say that religion is not at all important and they never attend religious services—about one in five Americans fall into this box. In fact, the bottom left four boxes comprise about a third of the entire sample—that’s low attendance and low importance.

In contrast, about 7% of folks attend more than once a week and say that religion is very important. The top right four boxes equal about a quarter of the sample—those are the more religious folks.

But look at the bottom right, that’s where I wanted to focus my attention for this post. Specifically on people who meet two criteria:

They say that religion is very important.

They report their religious attendance as seldom or never.

In the sample from the last couple of years, that equals about 9% of folks. That’s not nothing. In fact, if you extrapolate that out to the adult population of the United States, that might mean 20-25 million people are high importance/low attendance.

Is there a growing trend, though? Are more and more people saying that they think religion is important, then just not showing up for a weekend service?

I’m not sure if that’s the case or not. There may be an increase in the trend line, but it’s not a huge one. Between 2008 and 2012 (let’s exclude 2009 as an outlier), I’m pretty confident in saying 7-8% met this criterion. But that figure has slowly crept up over time. Now, since 2019, the share who check both these boxes is likely in the 8-9% range. So, I think it’s fair to say that it’s a growing phenomenon, but not a rapidly growing one.

But I had to look under the hood of this one just a bit. Are there certain factors that seem to be driving this phenomenon of cultural religious people? Obviously, politics was the first thing that came to mind. So, here’s the trend line for Democrats, Independents, and Republicans between 2008 and 2022.

Okay, now I think we can see a clear shift. Among Democrats, the share who say that religion is very important but don’t go to church is stable over time. It was about 6% of them in 2008, and it’s essentially the same share today. For Independents, it’s probably a modest increase. It hovered around 7.5% for a while during Obama’s first term, then began to slowly creep up. Now, it’s probably the case that 8.5-9% fall into this camp.

But among Republicans, there’s no mistaking what is happening here. The share who are culturally religious has risen quickly. It was about 5% of all Republicans in 2008 who said that religion was very important but they attended services less than once a year. The trend line in 2022 was just about 11%. So, today, a Republican is twice as likely to be culturally religious compared to a Democrat.

I had to take a look at age, but I really had to think about how to visualize this in a way that is not deceiving. Because there’s a big problem when you combine two metrics like this: a lot more older people say that religion is very important compared to young adults. In fact, it’s 50% of those in their seventies, versus just about a quarter of college-aged young people. So, of course, more older people are going to be culturally religious, just based on that criterion.

So, I had to switch it up a little. I restricted the sample to just people who said that religion was very important, and then I calculated the share who described their religious attendance as seldom or never. This gets us closer to the actual reality.

About 15% of younger folks place a high value on religion but just don’t go to religious services, but the share begins to climb from that low point. Among 40-year-olds, it’s just slightly more than 20% who are in the seldom/never category of attendance. It really peaks among people in their fifties. Among 55-year-olds who say that religion is very important, a quarter go to church less than once a year. It does decline a bit beyond that point, but it’s still north of 20% even among folks in their seventies.

I wanted to put a little bow on this post by putting all this to a more rigorous test—a regression analysis. The dependent variable is identifying as culturally religious (religion is very important + I attend less than once a year). I threw all the basic suspects into the model—age, income, gender, race, education, and political conservatism. This model is awesome because everything is predictive in one way or another. That’s not usually the case.

There are four factors that predict a lower likelihood of being culturally religious: income, education, being white, and being male. The one with the largest coefficient is race. A white respondent is significantly less likely to be culturally religious compared to people of color. This is followed by gender and education. The least predictive is income, but it’s still statistically significant. All drive a lower likelihood of cultural Christianity.

There were two factors that make someone more likely to say that religion is very important but they don’t go to church: age and political conservatism. All things being held equal, older people are more likely to be culturally religious. The same is true for being a conservative.

I don’t why but I can’t stop conjuring an image in my mind when I was thinking through this data - this is Andy Griffith Show fans. It ran for eight seasons in the 1960s. In many ways it’s the most wholesome show you can get. No sex, no drugs, no swearing. Just good morals. Ted Koppel went to a small town in North Carolina that was Griffith’s birthplace. It’s revitalized it’s economy by becoming a haven for tourists to revisit a bygone era.

They like the clean, wholesome nature of Mayberry. They watched the show as kids. They want to go back to that earlier time. But they just can’t manage to make it to church. They want to recreate the era of Andy Griffith, but not expend the actual effort of sitting in a pew on a Sunday morning. It’s just another example of people who like the idea of religion, but not the actual religious part.

[mipwrites]

WIP TAG GAME

Thanks @isahorcrux for the tag!! I love WIP games, and it is nice to check in and let everyone know where youre at in terms of writing! I have a lot in the pipe I haven't even hinted at for writing lmao

Guide:

1. List the titles your top five priorities for WIP updates (link your fics for new readers!)

2. An upcoming scene, event, or detail in each fic that you're looking forward to writing

3. Bonus: make a poll for your followers to vote on which top 5 WIP they are most excited to see an update on!

4. Then tag 10 writer friends!

Titles

A Court of Snow and Shadow Chapter Four -- ACOTAR, Azriel/OFC multi-chapter.

2. Sermon Chapter Eleven -- Batman, JasonEra!Robin Jason/OFC multi-chapter.

3. currently untitled Teen Wolf fic -- Derek Hale/OFC multi-chapter

4. ACOSAS Sequel A Court of Song and Flame -- ACOTAR, IC!Children fic, multi-chap

5. currently untitled Reacher fic -- Reacher (TV series), Reacher/Roscoe whatif! fic - possibly a one shot, more likely short multichapter.

Spoilers Abound Ahead! Turnback now!!!

Upcoming Writing

1. I've been incredibly sick for the last few weeks, so my goal to get chapter four out by the end of February likely will not happen, but I am so excited for this chapter. We're getting into Nyra's POV here, and diving deeper into Winter Court dynamics and her feelings on everything that happened. Her internal monologue has consistently made me laugh while writing, she's hilarious lol.

2. Sermon has been my white whale since 2017 lmao. I took two years (!!!) off because it stressed me out so much just staring at that document, plus everything else going on in my life. But I'm determined to finish it!! and now that actual plot is happening and all the exposition is over, I think that will be a lot easier. I love my lil babies cannot wait to finish their stories lmao.

3. So this one came to me once the Teen Wolf movie came out and uh....I had some issues with it. Namely how this entire series treated Derek. But I also was really interested in the idea of Derek being a parent, and all the questions around that - like who was Eli's mother? Where is she? What would rebuilding a werewolf pack like the Hales *look* like? I delved into it and sadly never found anything concrete enough to plan around, but I may rewatch the series again to get some inspo if there's enough interest.

4. Okay, so yes, I haven't even finished ACOSAS yet, why am I thinking about a sequel lol. Honestly, I just got really interested in what the Inner Court's children would be like, and quickly found myself pulled under lol. A Court of Song and Flame focuses on [SPOILER] Azriel and Nyra's daughter, Aella, and her relationship with a certain son of an Autumn Court Prince. It sort of turned into a buddy cop/romcom/mystery and I really, really love the idea. Just gotta finish ACOSAS!!!

5. I. Love. The. Reacher. TV Show!!! I found the first season so fun and compelling, and just absolutely fell in love with Roscoe. I had this idea of "what if, after leaving Margrave, one day a blonde teenager comes calling to find a father her mother only had stories of. Chaos ensues. I only have the first threads of it but I hope to expand it later.

Tagging a whole host of people that I'm sure might have already been tagged: @thequibblah @clare-with-no-i @emeralddoeadeer @sunshinemarauder @noneedforbloodpressure @acourtofwhatthefuck and anyone else who'd like to do the wip tag!

[bandedbulbussnarfblat]

sometimes, i really wish i didn't live in the bible belt.

i've been atheist my whole life. or at least, once i got old enough to question things instead of just blindly accept what my parents told me. though i was never good at that either, i was one of those kids that had to know things. i never bought into the tooth fairy or easter bunny, and i thought santa was just a game we all played and pretended to believe it. the idea of god felt the same to me, like some thing we were just pretending to believe in

except the grownups (and even some of the kids) actually believed it. so i went along with it, because my mom made me go to church with her, so it wasn't like i had a choice. but it never felt true to me, though i tried to make it feel real

i was 11 when i realized i never would and never could. i had tried to force myself to believe, but it never worked. i knew, deep inside, that there was no higher power. more so, i knew i couldn't keep spending my life living a lie. i knew i'd never be the believer i pretended to be.

and that scared me. not because the idea of hell or anything, but because i'd sat through more than one sermon and heard about how non-believers would burn in hell with the sinners. and my church 'family' seemed to agree. so that let me know that these people who called themselves my friends would be fine with seeing me burn in hell for all eternity, just because i didn't believe in the same invisible man in the sky as them

i didn't even believe in hell, but just imagine that. knowing that the people you've known your whole life believe you deserve to be punished forever for not believing what they believe. i'd already spent my entire life feeling like an outsider (multiple undiagnosed mental illnesses/disorders) so when i realized i could never be what these people wanted me to be, that i would never be able to convince myself to believe, it terrified me.

so much so that i got 'saved' in front of the congregation the next sunday. i pretended to believe as hard as i could. hell, i even wrote fake entries into my diary just in case anyone found it and read it

i was so afraid to admit i didn't believe. but so angry that i had to pretend. so i questioned things and made people uncomfortable. eventually, i had enough and said i was atheist. i was more angry than scared by then, fueled by teenage angst and hormones and the undiagnosed depression/anxiety disorders

in the end, I stopped going to church when my mother stopped forcing me. but the damage had already been done. i'd spent years trying to shove myself into a box i didn't fit it, for people that frankly didn't deserve that kind of sacrifice on my part

and there are still people who hear that i don't believe and judge me. who try to convert me. who think of me as less than them bc i don't believe what they believe.

i don't know why i'm thinking of this today. maybe bc my country is hurtling into evangelical christian fascism and that scares me. but i think growing up like that gave me some low-key religious trauma

and now I'll have to go back to work soon. where i'll have coworkers who ask me about where i go to church, who try to invite me to there's. to students who sometimes ask me questions about religion, and I have to say i'm "not religious" bc if i say i'm an atheist there's a good chance parents will complain about me teaching their child

i've literally heard a coworker being gossiped about and mistrusted bc he's openly atheist. people blatantly admitting they don't want to work with him. so i stay in my lane and stick to myself and try not to engage with these people beyond a professional level

i have to sit in anger, when we're forced to do something like pray in school, something that isn't supposed to be legal. hell, our superintendent makes us all pray with him when we have our yearly meetings

add to that i'm pretty far left when it comes to politics, i'm queer, and neurodivergant i don't feel like there's a place for me here. i live in a very conservative area. i'm talking majority trump fans conservative. but i'm trapped, too poor to escape. and it eats at me sometimes, being around all these people who if they knew me, would condemn me. even if i believe in letting people believe or disbelieve whatever they want and minding my own damn business about it

sometimes, i really wish i didn't live in the bible belt

[maeve-is-annoying-about-books]

Iron Widow, Chapters 1-5

Wu Zetian is a vicious woman and I love it. I adore it.

I can appreciate a main character that's a little bit feral. It's hardly like she's wrong to be so, either. She lives in an extremely misogynist society, her feet have been broken and bound into "lotus feet", and her sister was killed. Used as energy to power a giant mech that fights alien bugs. I think, though, that while these all might be reasons for her attitude, I don't think they're the end-all be-all, as though she were a perfectly docile women enriched in feminine manner before. No, I think her internal drive, her anger, all of it are intrinsically herself.

Important because these are nominally masculine traits that I haven't often seen depicted in a female lead. Usually I tend to see the modern-typical example of fantasy womanhood, that of competence, coolness, a collected attitude over a mental storm. It's anecdotal, I totally admit, but my experience so far with our heroine has been so refreshing for my personal reading life that I can't help but bring it up. I wonder, a bit idly, if Author Zhao's editor often argued with them about Zetian's character. If whomever was overseeing was worried that Zetian would come off as "bitchy" or "unlikable". Something I've seen a time or seven when a lady character expresses herself in any way that is less than perfectly "reasonable".

In a book so steeped in gender and its roles, it's hard not to talk about its parallels in the real world. I expect I'll have much to say about it down the line, as well.

For the rest, the substance of the story, I want to say that I appreciate the kind of earnestness Author Zhao presents their world with. It's a bombastic, vibrant, up-front world. The last thing I would expect from a book is a type chart that shows the five elements' strengths and weaknesses on the front page. The mechs transform in response to spiritual energy, and their forms are shown int he first pages. Ah! It tickles me how unapologetically fucking radical it is. So far there have been no long sermons on why having animal mechs that become bipeds are tactically the best choice for humanity's defense, and I hope there never is. I'm with you, I am along for this ride, my disbelief is liberated from my body by sheer force of my love for giant robots.

For the meat of what's happened, as I've said, Zetian's sister has been killed. Her spiritual energy was used up by Yang Guang to pilot the Nine-Tailed Fox. This is seen as business-as-usual by everyone in society, even Zetian's own family. And it is frustratingly heartbreaking that it's so, everyone seems to be on the page that this was the best possible thing she could have done with her life. To be fuel. Because isn't it? Isn't it better to give up a life to the Prince-class Pilot than let the Hundun threat breach the wall?

No. No, not in the slightest. Not even a little bit. Because the truth is that she never gave her life willingly, the society around her told her, her entire life, that it was all she was worth. That's not a choice, nor a noble sacrifice. It's a tragedy that these women are all doing this, clinging to the faintest hope they'll be a Balanced Match when they're given over as Concubine to a pilot.

Yizhi, ah you sweet boy. He wants nothing more than to save Zetian's life. There's no way she'll ever assassinate Yang Guang and come out alive. But the fact of the matter is that Zetian doesn't want to live under this system anymore, doesn't want to deal with the inevitable pile of bullshit that would fall on her and him. She's poised, hairpin in hand, to strike at everything shes grown to hate. Yizhi can do nothing about it at this point, even if they could have had a quiet life. But of course they can't, and not just because of Zetian's decision, or because Yizhi didn't "fight hard enough" for her. Their entire society set this split into motion, and it's all the more sad for it.

And all the more gross when we meet with the selection process for a new Concubine Pilot. It's exactly what you expect. They're all told to, in essence, be emotionally responsible for Yang Guang. To comfort him, to give him anything he wants, even their bodies. Even their minds. Seeing as how piloting is a melding of minds, after a fashion. Be meek and submit, they all say. I find it no surprise that the very picture of this "ideal submissive woman" was Zetian's biggest obstacle to getting picked. Xiao is everything Zetian isn't, all her fierceness is in guarding the system built to use her, and she folds to the words of authority in moments. It's why Zetian is ultimately picked, she'll be interesting for awhile and then, like all the rest, she'll be gone. Sooner the less fun prettyboy Yang has, I presume.

It might be the very battle that starts now.

[reiarcher]

So, I'm nonbinary and gynesexual (attracted to feminine features, not just females) and I grew up in a very religious family. The first ten twice years of my life were spent going to church every Wednesday and Sunday. I never realized how little and how much it affected me at the same time. I've always struggles with being the "weird" kid, or the "interesting" one. Weird taste in clothing, food, music, entertainment, you name it, I was the weird one for liking the stuff I did. But, growing up in that environment, it tempered that strangeness. Everyone complimented me and focused on me when I dressed a certain way, acted a certain way.

I liked it, who wouldn't, but it just didn't feel like me. I didn't realize exactly why until recently, but, I'll get to that in time. For a while, my family stopped going to church. The one I'd grown up in was falling under. Sermons were lacking, the youth group was in shambles, and there were less and less events every year.

Of course, me being the idiot I am, have been, and always will be, I asked if we were going to church one Sunday morning. That's how I ended up being dragged to church every Sunday morning no matter what, unless I was sick, until I was eighteen. So far this is all normal, happens to kids everywhere in the U.S. Nothing special. It's just indoctrination, after all. Then, when I was about fifteen, I figured out that I'm not straight. And that's where everything went out the window.

Now I was suddenly that much more different, that much more strange. So I leant into that image is built up for twelve years even harder. Cowboy boots, jeans, zip up hoodies, "cool" t-shirts, face constantly in a book. Then I started listening to the sermons. Really listening. And I started seeing just how stupid it all was. I has never been a devout christian in any way, but, now I was finally starting to see how morally bankrupt religion really is. Purposely making people dysphoric. Purposely making people uncomfortable with their sexuality. Treating women like objects, men like gods, and marriage like a way to control women.

One of the girls in the youth group, who, at the time, I had a crush on, shared her confessional (basically a conversion story, for those not in the know) one night, and... Well, I couldn't bring myself to even talk to her after it. It took her one sermon to go from a bisexual with a long time girlfriend that she was in love with, to being "straight" and homo, bi, and transphobic. After hearing that... Something in my mentality shifted. At the time, I thought I was pansexual, and I promised to myself that I would never leave someone over something as stupid as religion.

Fast forward a bit, to when I was seventeen, and the LGBTQ+ community was starting to grow in both size and volume. Of course, my parents being who they are, started to make nearly every conversation they had involve the community somehow, just so that they could bash it over the head with whatever stupidity they could muster. And that's a lot. Then more and more people started coming out as trans, and they couldn't leave that alone.

Of course, with how horrid my parents were being, I had to vent quite a bit to my friends. And, through that, I realized that I couldn't remember a single verse of the bible. And yet, a single line, from a song if only heard a couple times was stuck in my brain on repeat everytime my parents started talking about the LGBTQ+ community. "One page of the bible isn't worth a life." Such a simple line, yet, every time I hear it, it hits just as hard as it did the first time I heard it. That single line had a bigger impact than an entire book of bigoted, disgusting ideas.

About seven months ago, I figured out that I'm nonbinary, and it just made listening to my family so much worse. Now that I'm nineteen, and I've got a job, I'm trying to get as far away from my family as I can as quick as I can, but, I think we all know how that usually goes.

Tldr: Religion is stupid, parents are stupid, I'm an idiot, but not stupid, surprisingly, and I'm bad at trying to keep my stream of thoughts in any way readable.

[varjopeura]

13, 27, 47, and of course 61 for tomu and/or glimmer! :3

13. what are some motifs you associate with them? did you intentionally bring in those motifs, or did it happen over time?

Tomu: For Todenmukaisuus, there is the recurring theme of Running Away that just keeps resurfacing over and over again. There's the obvious and intentional instance of it in her backstory (running away from her past and starting her life as an adventurer), but the amount of escaping various situations her current party does took me entirely by surprise. Just on the top of my head I can list five separate times the party went "okay, time to leave this place very quickly, and we're all in agreement that we can't come back here ever again, right?". I've been immensely enjoying playing with this theme and can't wait to see if she and her companions ever learn to not run away from all their problems. (also, nowadays every song about messy breakups and abusive relationships remind me of Tomu, so I guess that's a thing too)

Glimmer: Glimmer's got the fully intentional fire motif going on. At first it's all gentle light and candles, tiny friendly flames that need protection, and as the campaign kept going and Glimmer's powers grew greater, so did the flame imagery grow into a blinding, scorching wildfire, burning everything around it in order to change the world. I really like the idea of light as a both gentle and destructive force, and wanted to explore both aspects of it with Glim's journey.

There's also a surprising amount of eye imagery that I associate with her, especially in regards to blindness. This one I didn't even realize until late in the campaign, when Glimmer got blindfolded for a while and it just felt… important. The blind eye motif has just crept its way into the art I draw of her, into her playlist lyrics, into the npc:s that are close to her. It just was always there, waiting for me to See it, I guess :D

27. how do they usually dress? why do they dress the way they do?

Tomu: Todenmukaisuus usually wears what I like to call "pirate clothing": poofy deep-cut linen shirts and duster coats, things that look good but not too flashy, and are somewhat gender neutral. You never know when you need to disappear into the crowd or slap a fake moustache on your face and pretend to be someone else entirely, so the clothing must reflect that. (I'm still not sure if this will change in the light of recent events where she acquired a Hat of Disguise and is thus free to dress however she likes without worrying about the disguising aspects of any given outfit. Personally I'm fond of her current looks as they are!) In terms of color, she favors deep mahogany browns and wine reds, accented with gold and cream details.

Glimmer: Glimmer sticks pretty much entirely to her cleric robes, though in a very mix-and-match fashion that is not necessarily endorsed by the clergy of Dawnfather as a whole. I imagine the vestments consisting of layers and layers of separate pieces, and donning them is supposed to be a half-meditative process where the cleric thinks about the different aspects of faith the garments represent (I recently learned this is actually very similar to how christian priests dress for sermon, too). The process of dressing up while deep in prayer is of course a whole ordeal when the robes in question are your everyday clothes, so Glimmer tends to just… skip it entirely. It's not like she'd remember the Correct Parts anyway, as the formalities of being a cleric aren't exactly her strongest suit. So in her case, the robing situation tends to wildly differentiate between each day. Today's warm, so maybe just the light lacey undershirt and an embroidered vest over that to make it look decent. Or, no one's going to mind of she just takes the hem of the robe and reworks it to a pair of trousers, that's just the sensible option deep in the woods or on horseback, right? (I actually really want to draw a full Glimmer dress-up chart, there are so many fun options and so many pieces to figure out. Maybe I will, I'm inspired now.)

47. what could they talk about for hours on end?

Tomu: Tomu would probably explode from excitement if someone asked her about her process of the fake potion crafting. These things take skill and thought, you know, it's not just randomly slapping ingredients together like you're a child playing with mud. You need to know all the differences between how different types of oils, alcohols and inks work, you need to know the right quantities of ingredients that will make or break the potion. It would be catastrophic to slip any of this to her customers, obviously, so she has taken a habit of not really speaking about her "trade secrets" to anyone. But she is very proud of this skillset, she desperately wants to spill the beans on it! So if someone she trusted would ask about her potion-crafting, they would definitely get a lengthy rundown about the different properties of all the things you could feasibly sell in a bottle. (I think Tomu would love to have an apprentice for this stuff, now that I think of it. She's SO not ready to teach anyone, but she'd love it nonetheless.)

Glimmer: Glimmer is not much of a talker, really. She can listen to other people talk for hours, completely enraptured by their words, but she often hesitates to join in on a conversation for fear of saying something Wrong. I think the closest thing to a hours-on-end talking for Glimmer were the (not necessarily entirely canon) side conversations she was having with the party bard, Harmonia. Those were basically in-character therapy sessions that sometimes got very long. The tieflings in that campaign had a lot of baggage between the two of them and we as their players were happy to drag every horrible bit of backstory into scrutiny between the actual game sessions. :D

61. is there an in-game moment of theirs you think about and just laugh?

Tomu: I love most of Tomu's attempts at deception, she's an absolute mess if she doesn't have the time to properly plan things. My heart holds a special place for the time the party was sneaking in the fields of some noble family in order to do some Nefarious Deeds there. Unfortunately they were spotted by a group of guards, and Tomu, reacting quickly, disguised herself as a noblewoman and tried to claim that she's just traveling to the nearest town with her group of servants and got lost, and no, she does not need to be escorted back to the road, and no, she does not need any directions, she's going to figure this out all on her own. Obviously this raised some suspicions in the guards. The party ranger also decided that this was the perfect time to sneak away from the group and do their intended sneaky business now when the guards' attention was elsewhere, but he got noticed right away and the situation started to escalate rather quickly. There were arrows shot and swords drawn, though the situation never broke out into a full fight. Tomu never broke character and kept complaining about bad servant material, asking the guards if there was a place in town to hire some better ones, and criticizing the confusing road design that leads people wandering on some random field, and hey, young man, you almost hit me with that arrow, watch it now! Finally the party was able to just walk out after Tomu offered the guards a rather sizable bag of coin "for ruining their field". Like, it was a mess. I still don't know if she even succeeded at whatever she was trying to do, but all of it was hilarious anyway.

Glimmer: The one Glimmer moment that nevel fails to make me laugh happened very early in the campaign. The party had found out about some suspicious cult activity in the small town they were staying in, and decided to investigate it. The characters split their ways and tried a different approach each, Glimmer's thing being just straight up trying to spot some of the grey-robed cultists on the streets. After a botched perception roll, she ended up spending hours wandering around the town, not finding any cultists but following around various innocent people she had deemed "suspicious looking" for wearing things that would maybe look grey-ish if you squinted. When she finally got back, the rest of the party were already sharing their findings with each other. And Glimmer busts through the door into the middle of their conversation, urgently and confidently sharing her news to everyone else: "There are no cultists here, but everyone else in this city is being shady as hell, we should go." The line was just delivered straight from her heart, so passionately that I can't but laugh when I remember it. I think that was one of the first moments where Glimmer took over and I could just watch her do dumb shit and enjoy the ride, too.

[kuuyandere]

Do you ever try to distract yourself? Lately I've been working on my art for like 10 hours a day. I've been sleeping like 5. As soon as I put stylus to tablet, my mind won't stop thinking of drawings or story ideas or sketches or studies or whatever else. I am the sort of person who can get lost in their work, but never to this degree. And I took it easy today for the first time in a while, and I realized why.

As soon as I stopped working, I felt lonely. I started missing my Darling again... She's my best friend, but she's really busy lately. And although we are still friends, slowly and painfully I'm beginning to realize we'll never be as close as we used to. She's just moving onto a whole new stage in life, and I don't think it'll have room for me forever...

I kept trying to lose myself in my work, but as soon as I'm too tired to continue the hollow, empty feeling of life without her sets in again. It's not fair... Do you ever try to distract yourself from your feelings? Have any tips on how to make it last longer, before it starts hurting again?

That sounds really painful, I am sorry you're going through that. I imagine mourning the intimacy you used to have with your darling is a heavy type of loss, and adding that to fearing for the future of your connection is intense. I am in a similar situation, so I kind of understand the feeling. It is especially difficult when you are dependent on your beloved for happiness and meaningful interaction. She becomes more of an emotional need than a want, and the thought of losing her from your life completely is terrifying.

I do tend to distract myself with classes or work and occupying every second of my spare time with editing. Here is the thing about escapism though: it never lasts forever. You could work yourself to the bone, but at some point you will get tired and be back where you started because the feelings are still there, still simmering on the backburner. My tip is to distract yourself with something that directly counteracts the feeling you are trying to avoid, rather than trying to avoid feeling entirely, if that makes sense. For example, I often self-isolate and feel that I can't be happy without my darling, even though that is not true in reality. So I try to force myself to interact with other people or hang around friends I have been neglecting just so I am not dissociating and missing her alone in my room. Sometimes it is ridiculously hard and I am dragging my feet out the door, but it can help with the loneliness a tad or at the very least serve as a reminder that there are things outside of ruminating over her. I don't know if that helps any, sorry for the sermon. I truly hope things get better for you.

[roy-dcm2]

Theory - Why No One "Remembers" the Jedi

I've made this argument before, but this is the first time I'm putting it out on Tumblr. Everyone always asks, why no one seems to remember the Jedi in the Original Trilogy when they were around during the Prequel Trilogy.

Here's my fan theory - most people never knew the Jedi.

Let me digress for a moment and ask you an unrelated question, how many people do you know from Gary, Indiana? (I'm not asking the people who actually live in Indiana, btw)

According to Google, there are 73,886 people that live in Gary, Indiana.

I live on the same CONTINENT as the city of Gary, Indiana, and I've never met one person in real life that I know is from Gary, Indiana.

Here's a second question - how many Buddhist do you know?

I know 0, even though there are 4 Million Buddhist living in the United States.

Officially, there are only 10,000 Jedi across the Star Wars Universe, a universe of TRILLIONS.

Most people would never meet a Jedi in their entire life. Some people might have heard that some guy with a glowing sword was part of the Republic Army, but those people were too concerned with surviving the war to actually care if those Jedi had powers or not.

To sum up: People don't "remember" the Jedi, because they never KNEW the Jedi to begin with.

Now, let me talk about some extra background stuff with the Jedi.

After Revenge of the Sith, the Empire painted the Jedi like the Jesuit Priests.

The Jesuits (in their original incarnation) were a branch of Catholicism that did many good deeds, but they also positioned themselves as the "confessors of the powerful." They managed to weasel themselves into the royal courts of Europe to bend the ear of the most influential men on the continent for 200 years.

Eventually, the Jesuits were so pervasive amongst the Elite, that they had to be BANNED and dissolved across all of Europe.

Here's something people don't talk about any more: America used to openly distrust and discriminate against Catholics.

From the outsider's perspective, Catholics look very weird.

They have large ornate temples, and lots of rituals. (Church sermons were conducted in Latin up until the 1960s). Plus, there are the common practitioners, but then there are special members of the Catholic Church - Monks, Priests, and Nuns that are easily identifiable by their unique clothing.

So, just like the Jesuits, the Jedi had positions themselves right next to the Senate, with Chancellor Palpetine often meeting the members of Jedi Council. They are secretive and removed from society like catholic monks.

It was easy for normal people to believe that the Jedi had been secretly plotting to gain control of the Republic since they had already position themselves so close to the people in power, and had been leading the military for three years. It made Palpetine look like a hero for fighting them off.

Of course, the events of Revenge of the Sith were followed by the Purge, as Darth Vader and the Inquisitors sought to eliminate all remaining Jedi.

The Inquisitors are based off the Spanish inquisition. The Spanish Inquisition were religious zealots that were hunting down Muslims and Jews inside of Spain in the 1500s. Just like these Inquisitors are hunting the Jedi.

Like the real world inquisition, the Inquisitors are likely not a branch of the actual army of the Empire. The Inquisition was an extension of the Vatican/ Catholic Church inside of Spain.

The Emperor serves as a Dark Pope that has created the Inquisitors to carry out the purge of the Jedi, those people that tried to assassinate him long ago.

The Spanish Inquisition saw themselves as keeping Spain PURE, while these Inquisitors are maybe convinced that the Jedi really were a threat to the Empire/ Republic. So, the people of the Star Wars Universe tolerate the Inquisitors because they're main goal is to prevent the reemergence of the Jedi, who had plotted to take over everything.

[carniscrubs]

Does anyone truly care, or is it just an illusion?

Throughout my life, I have faced numerous challenges. However, I don't mention this to join the ranks of those who constantly emphasize how difficult their lives have been. You know the type—people who incessantly complain about the hardships they've endured, their myriad problems, and the troubled nature of their childhood or adolescence. We all encounter obstacles and difficulties at various points in our lives. Sometimes, all we desire is for someone to lend an ear and listen.

Guess what? I'm that person who is willing to listen! No judgment, no sermons, and no entanglement in controversial topics like politics or religion. None of that. Just a compassionate ear. If you're struggling and feel like nobody cares, I care. Give it a try! I may not be able to solve your problems or find the perfect words to say, and at times I might just sit here, staring at your text. But I will listen, I will respond, and I genuinely care. Why, you might ask, would I care about a complete stranger? Well, despite my attempts to deny it, I am human. I have experienced pain and found myself in situations where it felt as if the entire world had turned its back on me. I've had moments where I contemplated ending my own life, where I ran away (and actually did!), where I harbored ill feelings toward others, and where I wished to spend my life sleeping, avoiding the world outside my bed. I have ventured into some dark places without anyone to extend a helping hand and pull me out.

I never want to miss an opportunity to prevent someone else from feeling that way. That's why. That's why I would care about a complete stranger.

[anangelofheaven]

Sermon 18

Usually, I'd refer to a specific Bible quote to kick things off. And today was a pretty good one, Romans 8:15, which reads "The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption." 

The message there should be clear. In case it isn't, it's that God's laws empower you, not render you powerless. I've touched on this subject many a time. 

Yet life provided too superb a situation for me to pass up opining about, just yesterday in the Serpent's Tavern. So, rather than explore a subject in abstract by drawing on random scripture, I thought I'd touch on those recent events.

A group of mortals in the Serpent's Tavern were talking about forming up and targeting angels and demons. They were discussing who they'd go after, how they'd amass power, and how it was going to be their time to rule down here.

The notion was laughable. As the saying goes, in fact, "man plans and God laughs." And we angels laugh with Him.

Mortals will never have power down here. For one, they've been sent to Pandemonium for torment. For another, any power they wield comes from us. And lastly, as mortals, they're fundamentally flawed.

This isn't to say the angels have power either. We may be perfect instruments of God's will and aware of that fact, but we're fallible when He needs us to be. We can be slain, have children that turn into evil giants, even cry and get things wrong. Besides, we're down here in Pandemonium. This isn't our turf.

It's the demon's territory. But do they have power? No. They have the least power of all. Sure, they make the mortal souls down here their playthings. And yes, they've got supernatural abilities. But the entire reason demons fell is because they were jealous of mortals. And there are few clearer symptoms of weakness than jealousy.

No, there's only one power in Pandemonium, and it isn't the Lord of Lust, Asmodeus. It's plain, old 'deus'. It's God. He's the only power in Hell. He's the only power in heaven. He's omnipresent and omnipotent. He's all things that were, are, and will be. And only He has any true power. The rest of us, we're just kids at His table, able to feel nourished only when we follow His example.

The mortals' discussion of how they'd rule hell literally made me LOL. And it reminded me of one of my favorite philosophical and theological conundrums, posed by Saint Augustine. Augustine, who is one of my favorites for many reasons, particularly his youthful attitudes toward sex, asked, "if God is all places at all times, but is also all powerful, does He have the power to create a box big enough to contain Himself?"

Augustine couldn't really come to a conclusive answer. That is because, with an infinite system, all things are possible. That fundamental definition is referenced by the practice of Zen Koans, the little puzzles put forth by Zen sages to evoke both a logical notion and an illogical notion simultaneously, giving forth an experience of the paradoxical and the divine.

For the answer to whether God can create something bigger than infinity is "yes." Much like, within infinity, all answers are, ultimately, "yes." Limitless possibility multiplied by limitless time and space equals all things being true. That's God.

Yet things are as they are, aren't they? You're reading the writings of an angelic tavern dancer, sitting in your bathrobe with spots of Ben & Jerry's on it, listening to Halsey waft in from your neighbor's apartment. They are exactly as they are to you in that moment, and will never be different. And that moment, now that you've experienced it, is gone, never to come back, just like this moment is gone, and the next, and the next. That's mortality.

Follow God's example. Be the sound of one hand clapping, the diamond on the muddy road, the one hand clapping. Be as infinite as you can be, and enjoy it while you can. Soon, just like this moment, you'll be gone too.

[leonbloder]

Holy Meteroa & A Lesson In Community

One of the most dramatic locations I visited during my recent visit to Greece was an area known by the locals as Holy Meteroa, near the village of Kalabaka. 

The word meteora means "suspended in air," which essentially describes the six monasteries built on top of the impressive towers of stone that rise majestically from the foothills.  

These monasteries were all founded from the 12th to the 14th centuries, but there had been Christian hermits living in caves on the side of the cliffs for centuries.  

Each community that occupied these isolated and largely inaccessible monasteries chose the locations because they were isolated and inaccessible.  They wanted little to do with the outside world and desired only to focus on worship, work, and devotion to God. 

But over the centuries, villages and communities began to spring up beneath them, and the monks and nuns began to serve and be served by the people in them.  

Now, their primary source of income is drawn almost entirely from tourism.  Hundreds of thousands of pilgrims and curious visitors journey to Meteora every year to tour the monasteries, attend worship, pray, and buy artifacts, icons, and publications from their bookstores.  

Even so, many of the monks and nuns who live in these monasteries patrol the grounds and the chapels with dour expressions, policing what people are wearing, shushing any talk above a hoarse whisper, and chastising guides who allow members of their group to laugh.  

As I gazed at all of these beautiful sites high above the world, I thought of how they were a sign and symbol of the very Church itself in our current culture. 

The monasteries of Meteora learned long ago that they needed the communities around them, but they still seem to find ways to set themselves apart.  It's easy to look down our noses at the nuns and monks there, but we often do the same in our own contexts.  

Far too many faith communities have fashioned themselves in such a way that they imagine they are high above the culture and the communities that surround them.  They become isolated and inaccessible because of their inward-focused practices and their inaccessible theological location. 

Those of us in the Church can easily begin to see the world around us as something to be separated from and can fall into habits that keep us from welcoming others, serving our communities, and existing for the sake of the world. 

Or we will say that we welcome everyone, but when people with different backgrounds come through our doors, they often find that though they might be welcomed, they are only included if they become just like everyone else. 

We use insider language in liturgy and sermons without acknowledging that there are people in the congregation who may not get it and feel unseen when we do.  

Our worship services can become too focused on our preferences and comfort, and, more often than not, we never imagine what they seem like to the uninitiated who visit.  

Far too many faith communities adopt a Savior complex when it comes to their ultimate mission, losing sight of the fact that it is Jesus who rescues, Jesus who redeems, and Jesus who saves, not the Church.  

Throughout my life, I've heard countless Christian preachers proclaim that Christians should "be in the world, but not of the world," or spout the out-of-context missive to the Hebrew people from the Old Testament, "Come out from among them, and be separate." 

Through his teachings and his example, Jesus taught that any kind of "ivory-tower" mentality was not something God desired.  Jesus ate meals at the houses of those that everyone else avoided.  He proclaimed the Court of the Gentiles outside the Temple as "My father's house."  

Jesus taught his followers to be among the people and act as salt and light in the world around them.  In other words, he taught them to enhance the God-flavors in the world and help others see God better.  

You can't do that from a perch on top of a rock above the world below.  

May we follow Jesus' example and resist the urge to withdraw into our own safe little worlds that we often create in our faith communities.  

And may the grace and peace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you now and always. Amen.