#i've read the whole brick through twice

[thelawsofdaylight]

also i am attempting les mis letters again this year but i'm not going to be reading closely until we hit book 3 because that's where i fell off last time!!!

[cowyolks]

Ok so I've never actually put in a fic request before. I don't even have a specific idea! I would just love something were the reader is rescued by Gaz. He's our knight in shining armor, literally or metaphorically! Gaz is my favorite and I bet he'd do a great job helping the reader after whatever scary ordeal they went through <3

OUT OF ELEMENT

Pairing: Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick x Female! Reader

Prompt: Gaz didn’t notice the loose Polaroid of the two of you that fell from his vest, focusing instead on not being shot. He didn’t think anything of it, until his whole world came crashing down.

Words: 3.1 K

Warnings: Blood, Graphic Torture, gore, suicidal thoughts, it’s heavy, but Gaz saves us!

He knocked harshly upon the wood of his favorite sergeant’s door, an irritable look on his face. It wasn’t often Kyle was angry at anything, always the level head when it came to his missions and time on the field.

Not the last mission.

It had been a close call, he’d taken a bullet to the thigh, making him stumble despite his Captain telling him to move his arse. He made the team swear not to tell you after he was wrapped and bandaged. Soap had previously let loose about his helicopter mishap, resulting in you not speaking to him for weeks, settling upon giving him an earful when he returned to your shared home.

So here he was, angrily wondering what made Soap think he could flap his jaws after he swore he wouldn’t.

“I know you’re in there, MacTavish!” Gaz called, noticing the faint glow of light shift from under the crack of the door. A loud groan echoed, before the door swung open to reveal a tired looking Scot.

“Why’d you tell the Missus about my leg? I know it was you.”

Soap looked puzzled, already sluggish due to being woken at such a late hour. “Oi piss off, I knew better than to squeal this time.” He grouched.

Unease settled in Gaz’s throat, clogging his esophagus and making the tips of his fingertips numb in loathing shock. Soap didn’t take notice at first, “What? She get cold feet after you proposed or somethin’?”

You hadn’t answered his calls in three days. Which was practically unheard of, especially knowing that you were in fact, oblivious of his previous injuries.

“Don’t know why she’s not answering, mate.” He nervously aired, clenching his fingers into his palms. His phone felt heavy in his pocket, and for the fifth time today, he clicked upon your name and watched it dial.

Soap hovered carefully, his own eyes widening when the phone went straight to voicemail.

“Something’s wrong.” Gaz choked out, barely registering the comforting hand placed on his shoulder. “Did ye’ try calling your neighbor? Maybe they can check in?”

Gaz nodded his head frantically, thankful for the advise as he dialed Ms. Annie, a sweet old widow that loved to bring over cookies after Kyle mowed her lawn in the summer months. Soap ushered him into his room, pushing him into the old wood chair near his desk.

The phone dialed once, twice, before slow breathing picked up, “Hello?”

“Annie, hello. It’s Kyle, can I ask a favor?” Kyle attempted to not let his nervousness show.

“Oh course, what is it, honey?” Her sweet voice clipped with a tad of worry.

“I need you to go to my house while staying on the line with me. I haven’t heard anything from my fiancé in a while and I’m worried.”

“Well, hold on let me grab my slippers.” She mused, a small shuffling coming from the line before she hummed in satisfaction. “I’m sure she’s okay, Kyle. I saw her on Tuesday when she brought me lasagna and discussed the book we read.”

A ghost of a smile crossed his lips at the mention of you, how sweet and caring you were.

“Okay, I’m at your front door.” Annie announced.

“There is a loose brick on the left side of the mailbox, if you lift it there should be the spare key underneath.” Kyle bit his lip, growing even more nervous. Soap nudged his shoulder, signaling him to put the phone on speaker so he could listen. Gaz clicked it without hesitation, thankful for the listening ear.

“Okay, I’m in.” Annie informed, she called for your name. “She’s not home, but her car isn’t here.”

Kyle’s heart dropped to his stomach. You could be out shopping for groceries, or at the local library— yet he couldn’t stop the unease from eating his insides.

“Could you check our bedroom, second door on the left? Just to be sure.” He had blamed his constant paranoia, but he made sure you knew about the safe in the closet, a loaded pistol among the contents.

A loud gasp, “Oh my…”

“What Annie? What is it?” Kyle asked, standing from his chair in a blind panic.

“There’s blood, lots of it, Kyle.” Annie’s frail voice shook in fear. Kyle swore loudly, eyes clouding over that he could barely hear Soap speak.

“Answer this video call, We need to see what’s there.” Soap ordered, kicking chair out of the way to get a better look at the phone. Both men looked down, locking on the video call that shook under Annie’s grip.

His home, a place that had once been such a safe haven, was now destroyed. The walnut stained nightstands you had picked were tilted over and broke, the carpet stained with blood, too much for a single person to not need a transfusion. The closet lay open, bullet shells spilled over the floor, but no gun to be found.

Then, Kyle’s near dead eyes hooked on a flimsy piece of film, the once shiny photo covered with loving smudges of his fingertips. Through the video call, smiling back at him was his girl, your eyes crinkled with a smile, laughter escaping your lips as you beamed up at him. The photograph was so immensely special, a piece he carried everywhere in his vest— away on missions he would often find his thumb tracing across your face, pressing a gentle kiss where your cheek was.

Now the picture haunted him, scared him to his very core. It was always in his pocket, but here in a lifeline connection it made his heart stop.

It wasn’t supposed to be there, corners covered in blood as it mocked him like a biting snake.

“Steaming Jesus…” Soap connected the dots, hand on Gaz’s shoulder.

“Annie, call the police.” Gaz spat, already fleeing with no regard whenever she was calling the authorities. Instead, his feet hurried down the dull halls of the base, making his way towards Captain John Price’s office.

Whoever came up with the theory of an out of body experience must have never been tortured, you had decided.

If you saw yourself in the mirror, you wouldn’t recognize yourself, that was for certain. A deranged smile had made its way across your busted and swollen lips, your clenched teeth leaving sores against the flesh to suppress your screams. Now, you didn’t see the point, you’d rip your own lips off at the rate they were torturing you.

You weren’t sure what day it was, just that you were scared and you wanted Kyle.

Vomit clung to your neck, long dried and crusted, along with the mixture of blood slipping from the many blunt wounds on your head. You were certain you had a concussion, because whenever you saw the masked men come in with a weapon of choice, there was always two weapons blurred together. Or perhaps, they have gotten more creative with the torture.

You couldn’t cry anymore, far too dehydrated and starving for the shed of tears. Now you felt numb, fingers no longer shaking from the several breaks they’d performed so they could get information from you.

Information you had no way of knowing.

Where is the 141? What weapons did they confiscate? Where are they storing them?

You had babbled that you didn’t know, that Kyle never discussed his work with you, but they had taken it with a grain of salt, quite literally.

You were woken from your half conscious state by the absolute burning of salt placed on the infected laceration of your thigh, a knife wound they had produced several days before.

“Wake up, girl.” You didn’t want to, knowing that if you did wake, it would only bring you more pain. You wanted to sleep forever, to dream instead of live in this nightmare. A slap to your cheek startled you further, allowing one eye to open with a struggle.

“You’re little hag of a neighbor found the present I left for the Sergeant. It’s a shame, I wanted him to find it so I could see his face.” Accented English flooded your ears, although it sounded too far away. A retaliating groan worked up your throat, the mere rattle causing your muscles and bones to ache.

“You’re running out of time, so tell me where the guns are.” He demanded, fingers squeezing upon your neck blotted in angry bruises.

“Fuck you.” You hoarsely gritted, eyes falling shut in preparation for whatever pain awaited. The burning pain of electricity was far worse than any burn caused by fire, it singed your hair and the smell of your burnt body had you sobbing with no tears.

“Please. Please, just kill me.” You begged, no longer able to hold your body up, everything was limp, your nervous system shutting down and allowing numbness to take over.

Another shock, and you saw black.

You dreamt of Kyle, the soothing touch of his rough and calloused hands, his obsession with history and the mini dates he’d make out of it, the crewneck sweaters he’d wear around the house. The scent of cardamom, cigarette smoke, and something sweet that had you bury your nose into his neck.

You hummed at the phantom smell of him, the thought blinding the pain as you abruptly entered consciousness again.

Salt rubbed into your wounds. The combined smell of Kyle and the excruciating pain awoken something in you— steel claws, hoarse breath, seeing red.

You screamed, so loud your ears rang. It wasn’t your typical scream of pain, no— this was unadulterated rage. Rage that you were still being tortured for something you couldn’t control, for any Gods in the heavens that would listen— You needed to die, or you needed to escape. If you didn’t, you’d damn the whole world and spit on the surface until it crumbled in wrath.

“Kill me, you bastard!” You screeched as your sight adjusted on the tall masked man from before. How his hand was leant just too close to your bloodied mouth. Without even thinking you leant in like a caged animal, clamping your teeth down on his fingers with all the force you could muster. You bit into cartilage and bone, breaking skin and tasting the irony flavor of blood.

Even more satisfying was the absolute bloodcurdling howl he released, attempting to wriggle his hand out of your jaws, only damaging more.

But nothing good ever lasted forever.

You didn’t catch the sound of rattling until the metal piece of a pipe hit your jaw, a loud crack breaking your jaw with so much force you could only gurgle. Your body didn’t give you a choice, no longer able to clamp your jaw so you had to release him. You let out your own howl in pain, realizing now this was the last straw. If you weren’t saved, you’d bleed out and rot in the cold chair they strapped you to.

Vision blurred, you didn’t see the captor grab a knife with his non dominant hand, little whines leaving him as his hand lay mutilated and cradled to his chest.

He shifted behind you, holding the knife out, looking to strike upon your hunched over spinal cord, a horrific and painful death.

“Drop it, or I fuckin’ swear to god I’ll blow a hole in you.”

You couldn’t bring yourself to look up, knowing if you did you’d likely pass out from the pain. But you knew that voice, and if you were hallucinating, so be it, at least you could have heard Kyle Garrick’s voice one more time.

“She’s already dead.”

Then there was white hot pain, and blackness.

It’d been around the eighty-three hour mark when there was finally a hit on your potential location. Gaz hadn’t slept in days, and neither had any of the rest of the one-four-one. His worry was contagious, and it set a fire under all of them, scorching if the group came close to dozing off.

“John, we’ve got a pin, it’s not 100 percent, but it’s our best chance.” Laswell’s voice broke over the comms, halting Gaz’s pacing for a moment.

“Send it.”

The heli to the frigid frontier of Siberia was far too long, even as the the four had made quick work of the pathetic guard posts and ambushed the barrack. Still, they didn’t find you, and it was taking a toll on his mental health.

That was until he heard the horrific sound of a scream.

He took off fast, the barrel of his gun still smoking from the rapid release of gunpowder. His team followed behind, being his flank and support as they have for the most miserable week of his life.

An anguished cry, feminine—sounded from below a latch under a misplaced rug, his fingers grasped the handle, pulling silently to allow stealth. He’d need to be quick, as most kidnappers killed their victims within the first 48 hours. It’s been long past that.

Oh, how his heart bled when he looked beyond the shadows and into the spotlight where you looked dead. You were disfigured and bleeding, scared and wild. A caged animal subjected to a butcher while still breathing.

Anger was all he felt.

A man, dressed in a Konni uniform, a black shawl covering his face was seething, clutching a hunting knife just above your neck, where spinal cord met the soft skin.

“Drop it, or I fuckin’ swear to god I’ll blow a hole in you.” He found himself growling, aiming his weapon right between the man’s eyes. He’d kill him, despite the orders he’d receive, despite the gurgling of blood that fled your mouth. All Kyle Garrick felt was rage as the blade plunged against your neck, missing the viral artery due to the bullet now in his skull.

It wasn’t enough, never would it be.

“Oh God, Sweetheart.” Kyle found himself mumbling, panic sparking and erupting through every nerve in his body. You were dead, you had to be, so much blood, so much torture.

He rushed to you, catching your limp form that was practically glued to the seat they had tied you to. His hands were sticky with blood in mere seconds, attempting to plug the wound with his own flesh.

“I can’t feel a pulse.” His captain called close, Gaz not even noticing him as his fingers moved from your carotid.

“Med Evac is on the way, Soap start compressions, Gaz keep her airway clean,” Ghost ordered calmly, used to the blood and guts of innocents.

Gaz’s hand caressed your face, his other still securely planted on your wound.

In the first time in a while, he prayed.

“God, take me. Not her, not her.”

It’d been weeks.

Weeks since you’d medically been induced into a coma. They told him you’d go into shock from all the extensive injuries and infections, and it was for the best. He’d left only to shower and relieve himself, the rest of the time Gaz’s thumb drew careful circles on your palm.

Bandages covered your fingers, hard casts forming them back in place where bone had broke. Your cheeks were sunken, nutrition being forced into you through IV. Some of your wounds had healed, bruises now a pale yellow and lacerations now scabbed over.

Still you couldn’t get yourself to wake, even when you regained your sensation and could hear the gentle snores of someone next to you. The beeping of the monitor is what made your heavy eyes peel open— the sound close to that of an alarm clock.

Then you could feel. Fell the excruciating pain beyond your neck, the ache in your fingers, the warmth of the treated infection on your leg. But, the pain all dulled in comparison to the steady hand that rested on your open palm.

You were angry, angry he hadn’t shown up earlier. Angry that you were captured, upset that you now had plentiful scars.

Your eyes opened wider, and when you glanced at him, all the pain and anger and hurt flew away, only replaced with relief. He looked peaceful, eyes shut and soft exhales indicating he was asleep. But if you looked closer you could see the bags under his eyes, the bitten lip that indicated he was anxious, and the grown out stubble he typically hated.

“He just fell asleep.” A deep voice startled you, making you wince before attempting to silently sit up. You attempted to speak as well, but no sound came out. The man seemed to understand, for he was standing with a hmph, extending a pitcher of water to your dry lips. You tried to part them wider, so the straw could be placed, but your jaw burned at the movement and almost made you yelp. Instead, he tipped the pitcher, allowing it to pool. You tapped his arm after a moment, notifying him you were done.

You observed his boonie hat he wore, as well as the famous chops and blue eyes that held so much concealed loss. Kyle’s captain, John Price.

“Glad we found ya’, love. For your sake as well as his.”

You had so many questions. How long were you gone from home, where had you been, how many days were you in a coma? Then others, had I left the stove on? Stove? I’m hungry. Did the bill get payed this month? Will Kyle still love me with all these hideous scars?

It’s as if Price could hear all your thoughts, see the turmoil and pain laced in your eyes that welled with tears.

“Whatever your thinkin’, it’s going to be alright. Everything’s taken care of. That man hasn’t left your side, lord save em’.” He pointed at Kyle, who wrinkled his nose at the noise of his captain, slowly stirring awake.

“Told ya to not let me fall asleep.” His voice snarked, making your lips curl in sweet affection. It was good to know he hadn’t lost his sass. Your hand slowly trailed to his own, not quite able to close around his fingers.

The movement made him shift, surprise dancing in his eyes as he glanced at you. A million emotions fluttered across his face, but in the end he settled on concern. “Do you need the nurse? Are you in pain? What can I do?”

You barely heard the click of the door as Price left the room.

“Hold…me.” You choked out. If you could, you’d pinch yourself, making sure you were awake and feeling the warm and gentle embrace of Kyle, his forearms cradling your abdomen, and lips gently pecking against your face.

“Thought you… weren’t coming.” You choked again, painfully holding your chest while you coughed. There was a million things you wanted to say, thousands of things you needed to do, hundreds of doubts.

But oh, when he kissed you, you forgot about the pain, the anxiety, the anger for a simple moment.

“I’ll always find you, always.” He held you, knowing he’d have to nurse you back to health. Physically and emotionally. But he would. Oh, he would.

[w3bgrl]

can you be stealthy, agent seo?

synopsis: chan and juyeon endure a mundane schedule by talking some things out before heading home to meet with the rest of the boys. there, the members grow hungry during the early hours of the morning and changbin steps up to save the day, shockingly accompanied by none other than juyeon to the convenience store.

date: early september 2019

era: pre-levanter

word count: 3.1k

featuring: kang juyeon, bang chan, seo changbin, all other members mentioned

warnings: minimal swearing, descriptions of ot10 and former member woojin, reference to jisung's anxiety/hiatus

a/n: recently the more i write the more i feel like i'm not making any sense so let me know if i really am descending into madness on good ole tumblr.com/w3bgrl :) anyways binchu back on their bullshit

the photoshoot studio is cold when juyeon finally gets a text back, shifting from the comfortable position with her hands tucked under her thighs to pull her phone from her pocket, a gust of cool air sending goosebumps up her wrist as she reads the message. the dolled-up girl smiled down at the screen and her eyes flick up to check on chan's shoot progress again before responding.

'at least they're not playing our music. i think that would be torture.'

juyeon looked back up again, this time in search of whoever may be in charge of the music. surely she could request some more upbeat songs, right? — nothing against IU, obviously — but she was sure everyone could use some more pep today. her phone buzzed again.

bin: 'oh definitely. it's torture here. everyone's so quiet.'

'throw on some twice in between takes. heart shaker always does the trick for me.'

bin: 'you know what my song is?'

there, seated at one of the tables to rest between takes that just so happened to be the one with snacks, juyeon smiled down at her phone again despite IU's 'palette' resonating quietly off the brick walls through the camera's rapid-fire. she could already guess along the lines of what he'd say and yet she gave him the opportunity anyway.

'hm?'

bin: 'what is love <3 i wanna know know know know ~’

juyeon now had to set her phone down as she bit at her lip to conceal the stupid smile threatening her nonchalance, stewing in the confusing mix of cringe and affection combining in her chest — which is when she'd notice the absence of the repetitive click that'd been audible for the last 45 minutes, leaving nothing but the bittersweet song to fill the deathly silence in the building. by the time she noticed chan was already leaving the set and making his way to one of the seats beside her. juyeon discarded her phone back in her pocket.

"have you been awake this whole time?" the leader asked once he was in a comfortable-talking range. juyeon shifted to her right while he sat down with a sigh. "yeah?"

"damn, i thought you'd take a nap once you got a break."

chan spoke mostly monotonously, wholly unlike his typical cheerful disposition, and juyeon took this into consideration as she mulled over her response. "i thought about it...but i didn't feel like going back to makeup after drooling." and just as expected; chan simply nodded, closed off and serious despite her obviously playful remark. the younger girl waited for only a moment with a bated breath before sliding her icy hands back under her thighs.

"how you feeling?"

she could see his jaw clench as he looked back over at her.

"honestly?"

juyeon urges him on with a nod. "always."

"hurt." chan states flatly "and mad. and sad. mostly mad, though."

"understandable. do you wanna talk about it?"

his answer is immediate. "not really." juyeon smiles weakly to herself as she nods. "yeah, that's also understandable. i've had enough talking about it."

chan is now the one to prod as he shifts to loosen the arms crossed tightly over his chest. "how're the rappers doing with studio time?"

"jinnie would be hurt" she giggles at the implication and pulls her phone back out to re-read changbin's messages "good, bin said they've been quiet but productive. he said minho's been helpful for hannie."

chan sighs once more, this time much heavier in relation to the other weight reapplied to his chest, and juyeon can't help the way her gaze flicks up to check up on him. he looks exhausted, of course; the stress of these last few days had been agonizingly heavy — for everyone. woojin's untimely departure pulled the rug out from under their feet and before they could even ask any questions they were rushed to start fixing things: re-recording lines and redoing choreo and — chan suddenly spoke up.

"so, you and bin are good again? totally? i don't have to worry about you guys throwing a fit anytime soon?" finally chan grew a little lighter in his demeanor, slightly playful as he earnestly checked in on the former enemies. juyeon would carefully monitor her response.

"nah we're good. honestly, i think we're closer now. we talked it out and said our apologies, so i can kinda understand him better now, you know?"

finally the outline of a smile imprints on chan's lips, the first she'd seen all day, and he teases her with the nudge of his foot. "you guys are like hyunjin and jisung now."

"that's horrible" she remarks in passing and tucks her phone back in her pocket. there is a short beat in their conversation until chan is suddenly prodding again, this time in a secretive hushed tone; "can i ask you something?"

blood running cold upon the question, juyeon whipped her attention back to the older boy in order to analyze each and every feature in search of suspicion, her long nails clinking against jewelry as she tucked her hair behind her ear. "yeah?"

now chan seems apprehensive as he leans back, his thumbs twiddling in his hands clasped over his lap. he starts slowly. "those rumors...they were just rumors — just targeting you for being a girl, yeah?"

he is only half as calculated as juyeon — at least right now, finding his words merely as they came to him. it seemed as though he didn't know how or where to start until that came out which urged him to backpedal slightly.

"just — there's nothing going on between you and changbin, right?" chan adds almost frantically, his eyes reconnecting with her perpetually understanding ones, helping to soften his approach "you'd tell me if you felt that way for anyone, right?"

"of course, chan."

he feels relieved at the ease in her answer; it's apparent in the way his shoulders fall an inch further from his ears, how he subconsciously moves to face her fully, fidgeting hands now still.

"those rumors will haunt us forever," she says "but you don't need to worry about us. you've got enough on your plate."

chan nodded intently and took a deep breath. "well — thanks…that helps…betrayal feels like shit."

juyeon had to dig her nails into her palm as the minimal heat in her body rushed to her face. she pressed her lips together as she gulped, mirroring his nod before nudging him with her foot.

"wanna talk about it?"

chan would release a final sigh-like-grumble before admitting his defeat. "…yeah...i do."

seated in a circle gathered on the livingroom floor the disgruntled members are venturing further into the night when a particularly long lull in the conversation would reveal the audible grumbles of their bellies. they didn't even mean to entirely miss dinner in favor of their venting session, but as felix's stomach voiced its complaints for the lack of attention, seungmin turned to look at the oven clock.

"shit, it's 1."

hyunjin whipped around with wide eyes to check it out himself, mouth hanging open when he verified that it was indeed one in the morning. "dude...i need food."

"me too." jisung, who'd been especially quiet today, spoke in a small voice. from his place beside the glum boy minho would jump to offer the first meals that came to him. "i can make kimbap? or — we have the noodles for japchae?"

chan was already shaking his head "it'll take too long to make a portion for all of us. we should just go to bed, tomorrow'll be even longer."

finally, amongst all the pessimism filling the room in the form of hungry and tired mumbles, changbin spoke up in a light and playful tone with the ghost of a smile on his face. "what if i ran out to grab snacks? it'll only take 20 — 30 minutes."

juyeon's eyes now shot over to chan to watch the disapproval already creasing his brow. "everyone could pick their favorite" she chirped before he could say no in her best mimic of changbin's delicate demeanor. "little 'pick-me-up' before bed?"

soon all heads turned to the leader who sat contemplating with his own gaze shifting between the outspoken pair. he knew them — all of them — well enough to understand he was in the minority on this one, and though he also knew the risk of punishment for 1) sneaking out past curfew and 2) buying unhealthy snacks, chan would simply sigh.

"okay, but be quick, yeah? and please — whatever you do — just don't get caught, okay?"

changbin is already to his feet with a serviceable nod. "all will be well, hyung. now send me your orders!" he shrieks while stumbling his way through the crowd of boys toward his bedroom "i'm gonna grab a hoodie."

"i'll go with you." says juyeon naturally as she mirrors his actions, pushing herself to her feet and carefully stepping through the members closest to the front door. "grab me one, too!" she calls after him. a hand taps her calf once changbin is out of view.

hyunjin, with a hushed tone, has his neck cranked to look up at the older girl with furrowed brows. "since when were you guys cool again?" he asks, and she can feel heat blooming on her cheeks for the second time today as well as the other boys' growing proximity while they leaned in closer to hear the breaking news.

truth be told; after their huge argument bin and chu made amends and fixed their attitudes without ever clarifying what had happened to the members — not that they even asked, anyway. it seemed too tender of a topic; too fresh and too delicate, so instead they kept to themselves and observed from afar. by this point all they knew for sure was that they didn't bicker anymore and that was enough for them! but some of them swore the formerly close pair had begun warming up to one another again. in fact, just the other day jeongin had sent individual texts to tell the members they were taking selfies, so juyeon joining him on a solo trip to the convenience store seemed like a big moment.

reaching for her hair pulled into a bun juyeon's hand falls short to slyly scratch at her neck as she offers an uncertain-looking shrug, and just as her lips part to spit something out, changbin emerges from his room adorned in a sweatshirt with the hood up and one for juyeon in hand.

"ready?"

she hums and takes the hoodie to pull it on. changbin nods at hyunjin still sitting with his head uncomfortably panned upwards, "send me what you want."

"oh! right!"

the hoodied duo now turn their backs to slide their shoes on and the remaining boys all share a look with one another before whipping back to watch them leave. changbin steps out first, holding the door open for juyeon who pauses to wave before leaving, and then the front door closes behind them and the final 7 are left speechless.

"did you bring your wallet?" is the first thing changbin says once it's just them. juyeon's eyes narrow. "...no?"

"well — then who's paying?"

it only takes her a second longer to register the smirk lingering in the corner of his mouth threatening to destroy the act put forth. she can only smile and shake her head at his resumed antics. "come on." she chuckles, grabbing his wrist to pull him towards their destination despite the way her palm began to burn. "we've got 25 minutes to make it there and back."

changbin is smiling now too, the playful facade replaced by a genuine toothy grin, his tone now entirely too fond for the halls of the company building. "what would i have done without you?"

"is that what this is? you just wanted to hang out?"

changbin simply shrugs indicating that yes; this was just a ruse to enjoy her company (or undivided attention) since they couldn't interact how they wanted to around anyone else. it had become somewhat of a game they played throughout the day — to see what elaborate way they could sneak off without anyone noticing, though changbin was usually better at it. the first week after their amends, changbin faked back pain for her heating pad which was conveniently located in her room.

"i wanted to see you, can you blame me?"

juyeon finally releases his wrist and is positively certain of the burn mark left on her palm while she replicates his sly shrug, exuding charisma with her pompous tone "i mean, i am awesome, so that's understandable." she laughs at herself now and drops the act "but i texted you all day and now you've got me walking half a mile."

"i want to see you, though." changbin hums, his eyes on the blush warming her face "plus you left me on read for an hour! what's wrong with my twice pick?"

"nothing! what is love was a great choice! chan got a break and came to talk, that's all."

"oh...and how was that?"

juyeon sighed and shrugged again, this time far more serious and authentic than the last. "i don't know...i think it's just on his mind, you know? these long days give him more time to think about it — and he says he doesn't want to talk about it but woojin just keeps coming up." changbin now pulls his gaze away to open another set of doors for her leading to the familiar elevators that would bring them down to the first floor.

"what did he say?"

"just...you know —" juyeon presses the call button before crossing her arms, trailing off while she recalls their lengthy conversation at the shoot location and omitting the information that didn’t need repeating "he wishes they could've talked before it got to this point. he feels betrayed and on edge right now — especially with how hannie's been recently — not that it's his fault or anything. but he's mad about being left out of the conversation entirely, just kept in the dark until the decision was made."

the elevator dings as it arrives to their floor. changbin and juyeon step inside silently with the same reminiscent memory in their mind, and as their gaze meets again like the pull of magnets, the older girl leans against the railing to tap his shoe with her own. "he asked about us today, too."

changbin waits for the doors to close before he responds in a half-whisper. "and?? what did he say??" despite juyeon's cool manner in presenting this news changbin is nearly frantic, far more intrigued by her response now than the last time he asked.

"well, he wanted to know if we were good again — if he had to worry about us fighting anymore. so i told him no, we're good, and then he asked about the rumors; if there was actually anything between us."

"and you said...?" changbin's eyebrows furrowed at her, now clearly on edge in wait for her conclusion.

and yet, she remained shockingly optimistic, a faint smile on her lips as she spoke. "the truth; no matter how we interact, what's been said can't be unsaid, those rumors will follow us forever."

"so..." he sighed "we'll have to be like this forever? not to say that i don't enjoy these times with you, but i hate staying so far away all the time."

juyeon would now reach out to make contact once more, her delicate fingers trailing down his arm like she wanted to grab hold while her smile grew into a dazzling grin, eliciting an admittedly confused smirk from him. "actually, i think it's the opposite." she hums "i think if we play our cards right things'll go back to normal in time. i mean — we've always been good friends up until the rumors, right? and then we kinda had a falling out and grew apart, right?”

changbin nodded along to show he was still following as her demeanor became more mischievous the further she spoke. he could almost see the feigned innocence in her doe eyes as she said, “so now we’re just getting back to being friends — little by little every day. at some point we’ll be totally normal again and then any resurfacing rumors can be explained away by our fallout. if we play our cards right no one will even bat an eye — they'll just be glad we're close again."

the crimson-haired boy would merely blink back at her for a moment as he tested her theory in his own head and was shocked to find many of the same ideas pointing him in the same direction. whether her plan would go accordingly or not was still left up to the general public's perception of them — particularly her — which would leave their conclusion in the air until the time came, but this wasn't even the part he was really interested in anymore. instead, changbin's restrained smirk would grow to reveal his teeth before a dry chuckle escaped his throat.

"kang juyeon, you sly devil." he teased in a silky-smooth tone "i think you'd be a great supervillain, you are far more mischievous than you look. how long did you think about this master plan of yours?"

the elevator slows to a stop as they arrive on the lobby floor and she finally pulls away again to tuck a strand of hair behind her red ears with a casual shrug. "i told you i was awesome."

changbin has to bite back a full beaming grin when the elevator doors open and they exit silently towards the front doors of the jyp building. he rummages in his pocket for his id card to press to the reader before pushing the door open for her once again and resuming conversation the moment they were outside.

"and chan's not suspicious at all?" he asks, the cool breeze biting at his cheeks "you really think this'll work?"

juyeon laughs and looks back over at him with her signature beautiful smile (at least in his eyes) "i do. we just need to be stealthy, that's all." she then grabs the neckline of her sweatshirt and brings it to her lips as if talking into a mic, an eyebrow cocked at him. "can you be stealthy, agent seo?"

once again changbin has to fight back the giddy, knee-jerk reaction of a sunny smile at her antics and swallow the urge to remake contact, instead pressing an index to his tragus like he was listening through an earpiece. "actually, i think i can, agent kang."

ju's perpetually flowing giggles indicate utter satisfaction with his response and the so-called agent now nods forward toward the convenience store growing closer with each step. "good answer. now for our first mission; gs25 on yangjae boulevard."

[gellavonhamster]

13 books meme

Tagged by @littlestsnicket (thank you ❤)

1) The Last book I read: One Piece Novel Heroines by Jun Esaka, which I've already been posting about enough not to elaborate here

2) A book I recommend: can I copy your homework plagiarize the answer to this from the person who tagged me? Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell by Susanna Clarke. I know a lot of people find it too long or just not their cup of tea, but it's one of my all-time favourites, one of those books that feel like they were written for me specifically, and I cannot help recommending it to others :)

3) A book that I couldn’t put down: I remember reading TFOTA #2 and #3 (The Wicked King and The Queen of Nothing by Holly Black) in a single day. I was feeling unwell, and it was cold outside anyway, so I just spent most of the day reading in bed. I recall being surprised by how engrossed I was - the first book of this series didn't grow on me until well into its second half.

4) A book I’ve read twice (or more): I have this sideblog on Twitter where I post a quote from Dracula per day (yes, manually, I don't know how to make bots lol). I just move down the text and skim it and pick sentences that catch my eye, and when I reach the end, I start from the beginning again. So, in a way, I am constantly in the process of rereading Dracula

5) A book on my TBR: Chrétien de Troyes' Perceval and a bunch of its continuations, Lolly Willowes by Sylvia Townsend Warner

6) A book I’ve put down: the thing is, if I don't really enjoy a book but still can find a good thing or two about it, I will keep reading and hoping it will improve eventually, and if I don't enjoy a book at all, I forget about it as soon as I put it down. Out of sight, out of mind - unless I particularly hate it. When I try to think of any books of the latter kind, the first to come to my mind usually is A Discovery of Witches. I found the worldbuilding really interesting, but damn, the protagonists were so annoying that I wasn't going to struggle through that brick of a book for it.

7) A book on my wish list: I need to get a copy of The Bad Beginning, The Wide Window, and The Hostile Hospital, and then I'll have the entire ASOUE collected! Would also love to get any other Snicketverse books; I only have Poison for Breakfast - bought it literally last weekend. I could buy them online, of course, but: 1) I prefer to avoid online shopping if there is realistic possibility for me to come across that item offline; 2) accidentally stumbling onto these books in bookshops (especially second-hand ones) when I least expect them feels like such a right experience for this series that I am inclined to continue acquiring them that way.

8) A favorite book from childhood: Winnie-the-Pooh and The House at Pooh Corner... truly formative shit, responsible for at least 50% of my sense of humour

9) A book you would give to a friend: I was at my friend's place recently and noticed she had the exact same copy of Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury as I do. When I told her about it, she told me it was I who gave her that book (I forgot 🤦‍♀️) and that she loves it and rereads it almost every autumn :') So this one has definitely passed the test.

10) A book of poetry or lyrics that you own: I have a whole shelf full of poetry books, in fact. At least half of them weren't bought by me, but by my family members long before I was born, but presently all of them are considered mine :D Those that I bought myself include collections of poems by Christina Rossetti, Emily Dickinson, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Oscar Wilde, and Marina Tsvetaeva, among other things. And Useless Magic by Florence Welch!

11) A nonfiction book you own: I stumbled upon The Republic of Pirates by Colin Woodard in the same second-hand bookshop where I bought all the parts of ASOUE I currently have and couldn't believe my luck - I really wanted to read it after watching Black Sails! It's great.

12) What are you currently reading: Tristan and Isolde. Restoring Palamede by John Erskine. Really enjoying it so far; it sort of demystifies/disenchants Arthuriana but without excessive cynicism, with the narrator being understanding, perhaps even compassionate, when describing the characters' very realistic, human flaws. Technically I'm also reading E. W. Hornung's short stories about Raffles and Bunny through the Letters from Bunny Substack, but it's more like "desperately trying to catch up and failing". The stories themselves are delightful, but I was right to suspect that this way of reading books is not for me.

13) What are you planning on reading next? Dracula in Istanbul (the Turkish translation/adaptation of Dracula), courtesy of @seawilde <3

tagging @afoxnamedmulder, @seawilde, @lefresne, @uupiic, and @snckt; as always, feel free to ignore if you don't want to answer :)

[yrluvjane]

maybe...

a part 2 of go back to your new boyfriend w sirius 👀

The things I hate about you.

Part one

Sirius Black had successfully went from annoying the living daylights out of you to completely ignoring your existence. Every time, since the fight, your tried talking to him he was either:

Suddenly missing something or had forgotten about a class.

In a deep conversation with a very awkward and nervous-looking James Potter .

Having his tongue down Marlene’s throat.

The last one was the one that bothered you the most, Sirius was known for his playboy streak and was almost never seen with same girl twice, except for Marlene. Because of this, many rumors and theories were spread. Each more absurd than the rest, but even then, the sight of them together made a very tight and twisted knot in your stomach.

And the whole thing was making you lose your mind. Sirius no longer bothered you and that bothered you. You had completely lost any interest in any of your studies and the fact he was taking this much of your focus and concentration was embarrassing enough.

You had spent three whole days trying to understand this abnormal rage brewing in your chest, which then you realized was jealousy. You were jealous of Marlene. Because you liked Sirius. The realization hit you like a brick to your head.

You kept trying to push the thought away, trying to simplify as a side effect of all the studying you’ve been doing. And so you did, you took a break and went to Hogsemede.

But every time you saw Sirius and Marlene, you had this urge to punch both of them.

You only realized how stupid you sounded, when you took Madam Promfery’s advice and wrote all your feelings on paper.

You truly sounded like the main character of cliché enemies-to-lovers story, all you were missing was a best friend that would betray you and try to take Sirius away.

And all this led up to this moment right now.

You currently watched the hallway you were standing in waiting for Sirius to appear. It took you three whole days to plan this and you were quite anxious.

You took deep breathes hoping to calm your nerves but they only sky rocketed when the sound of footsteps reached your ears.

Your head snapped up and your eyes met Sirius's, causing alarms to blare in your head. His eyes widened and was about to say something but before he could even get a word in you pulled your wand out and petrified him.

"Oh my God, okay, okay. This is completely fine." You said to yourself as you levitated Sirius's body to an empty class room and faced his frozen body.

"Sorry, I just need you to listen and obviously there are more...comfortable ways to do this but this had the most promising outcome."

You took one last deep breathe and pushed your hair to the back of your ears. "Okay, I like you, like you like you. I know, "What?!" Trust me it shocked me too, but in this past week I realized lots of things. And one of those is just how much I miss your really annoying yet flattering presence. Yea, sure you're condescending, rude, annoying, obnoxious and I could probably go on till tomorrow. But the thing is, I like that stuff about you, or at least some of it but what I've realized I always classified it as hate."

"I hate the way you always flirt with me, it's disgusting, rude and completely inappropriate, but you do it to get a reaction out of me and sometimes it actually nice, it doesn't make me feel alone."

"Of course there are lots of annoying things about you, for example, the hair thing. Y'know the one where you push your hair back with your hands unlike Potter who runs his fingers through his hair. I hate it. And then sometimes you do it to me, whenever I'm studying, and it always ends up distracting. So I end up reading the same sentence fifteen times, and getting absolutely no work done.."

"I hate the way you keep staring at me, almost all of the time. During class, while were studying, at dinner, in the common room, on the courtyard and so on, it makes me feel really insecure."

"I hate the way your uniform is always untidy; your tie is always lose, your shirt untucked, your robe open and how you completely violate the rules by wear those rings."

"I hate how your really good at your studies but never want to show it, I watch you do your work, you have potential to go high places but whenever your in class you put on this "To cool for school" act that irritates me too much."

"I hate the way you follow me around and throw your arm around my shoulders as if were close friends. I hate the way you tell others I secretly love you whenever I brush you off."

"I hate it when you joke and make me laugh, I hate it when you say I'm uptight."

"I hate it when your right and I'm wrong, I hate it when you lie and leave me alone."

"I hate seeing you with Marlene, I hate it more when people make comments of how great you two seem."

"I hate it when you put me on the spot then call me shy, I hate it more when you hurt my feelings and make me cry."

"I hate the way you're not around and you don't talk to me anymore. But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you, not even a little bit, not even at all."

You shakily raise your wand, and cast the counter curse. You swallow as he stands up with wide eyes and looks at you. "I swear if you laugh, I'll punch you in the face." You say threateningly, as your eyes roamed his for any emotions.

He lets out a small laugh, "Did you just attack me, insult me and confess your love for me all in five minutes?"

"Six minutes and forty-seven seconds."

"Merlin, Y/n..." He says with a soft yet tired smile, looking at you silently.

"Say something, dammit!" You shout, completely on edge.

"Well, I was actually coming to find you. Your owl gave me this." He says, pulling something out of his robe pocket with a small chuckle.

He handed you your very-angry-and-emotional-feelings-letter that you must have left on your desk.

Damn you, Mr. Snuffles!

"So, you read my letter, what about the bloody ceremonial speech i just gave."

"You hate 17 things about me." He says walking closer, "And most of these seventeen I do because I like you."

At this point, he is shadowing you with his height, there was barely any space in between.

"What?" You asked with a dazed look.

"I like you too," He clarifies , one of his hands reach up to brush your hair back and cup the side of your neck, stroking your throat with his thumb, making your face heat up.

"The reason I was so angry last week was because everyone kept saying what a great couple you and Hillson made. I got so angry and took it out on you."

He uses his other hand too push a few strands of your hair back behind your ear, playing with ends as he stared deeply into your eyes.

"Then I came back to apologize but I heard some of the girls say, you locked yourself up. I went back to my room to think and thought that maybe it was just best to give up. So I avoided you and ignored you in hopes of getting you out of my head. I only got back to Marlene to get over you. Then I got the letter and came to find you right away."

You stayed silent for a good thirty seconds trying to absorb all this information, though it was quite hard with him tracing his thumb over your throat and collar.

"So you don't like Marlene." You stated.

He laughed and nodded, "You can rest assured, I don't like Marlene, only you."

"Good." You whispered as you laced your hands behind his neck, bringing his head down and attaching your lips to his.

.

[mischief-lies-and-stories]

Reviewing non-Marvel Loki Things (That I've Been Exposed to)

I am certain there's more, but these are all the non-Marvel Loki-related media I could think of that I've consumed. Maybe I'll do a part 2 if I think of some other things I've read/seen. These aren't really full reviews, just basic reactions of what I remember of these pieces of media.

The Gospel of Loki, by Joanne M. Harris

I...did not finish this. It was kind of interesting, I remember. But I'll be honest, one of the lines I remember most clearly is from the beginning where Loki says something like "For some reason on Asgard, I'm not allowed to fuck beasts or men and no one can tell me why." And then he just kind of, goes with it? Like first of all, why, if you can live forever, would you not only limit yourself to one gender (I'm okay with leaving the bestiality alone, but you could probably make a case for this, too, if they can consent), but force everyone else to, also? And anyway, even if Odin is a Puritan prick for some reason, the least believable thing about all this is that Loki stands for it???!!! Why is this the one thing about which he's like 'Welp, guess Odin knows best'? Frankly, it broke my suspension of disbelief for the whole thing. (You know how I was like Kid Loki saying "I killed Thor" made me go 'Oh, okay, the Loki writers don't have a clue who Loki is fundamentally'? Yeah, this is the line that made me do that with Harris.) I didn't even get far enough to maybe (probably) read my favorite myth (Sigyn catching the venom in her bowl).

Norse Mythology, by Neil Gaiman

So much better, holy shit! Leaps and bounds better!!! This is one of my favorite books. I've talked about it a little on here, but he's such a great writer, and I laughed out loud so many times for the way he portrays Thor and Loki especially (it helped that I first read this listening to him read the audiobook). I just love how he portrays Loki as only smart in comparison to the other gods, who are truly dumb as bricks, with Loki only slightly more clever by comparison. But I was still so attached to Loki that when he causes his own downfall in the end (like he does in the myths) I think I genuinely cried. This is one of those books I read at least once a year.

The Bifrost Incident, by The Mechanisms

I'll be real with you, I mostly only listened to the tracks I knew Loki (and Sigyn) were on. But I did also read the synopsis on the wiki, so I know the gist of the musical. And what I'll say of it is this: I discovered the album four days prior to writing this, and I've listened to at least the Loki track at least twice a day since. I'm a little grateful it's just (as far as I know) an album, because if there was a recorded performance somewhere, I could not watch it (even though I obviously would because I like to let myself suffer). Loki's arc is just too fucking painful (which is honestly saying something, given some of the shit he gets put through in other media).

Ragnarok, Netflix

I watched the first episode. I felt like it ended stupidly and way too dramatically for even the pilot. I know it's called Ragnarok, but it's a modern retelling, and Thor and Loki are kids, so it doesn't have to go so hard from the word Go. And Laurits did not make a good first impression on me either. Can't remember exact reasons why, though. I watched this a long time ago.

[serena-darrin]

Well, this sucks. After watching someone else struggle with the PC version of Jedi Survivor (they -still- can't get the game to load due to the issues!), I decided to do some technical digging to see if I could help them.

And in doing so I found out that my computer can't run the game at all.

I'm below minimum specs - my Graphics Card is unsupported for Survivor. Even if I upgrade my RAM, I very likely won't be able to play. I knew I might have a RAM issue (I only have 8 GB rather then the 16 GB that's recommended), but I never even thought to check my Graphics Card, as it's a solid-if-slightly-older card and this has never come up! I thought, worst-case, I'd be upgrading my RAM, not having to buy a whole new computer! Fallen Order lagged sometimes, but it ran decently - and the lag, I'm pretty sure, is a RAM issue. It runs Mass Effect Andromeda quite nicely without complaint (a teeny bit of stuttering if something else decided to run in the background is the only trouble I've ever had). And Baldur's Gate 3, which Isn't Even Out Yet, is also well within my Graphics Card specs. The only game that my computer has actually 'noped' out on is a Modded City Skylines Build, and that's clearly a RAM issue, and it might even be a Mod issue - I haven't had the patience to go through my modlist after the newest update. It runs my Absurdly Modded Skyrim build and my slightly-less-modded Fallout 4 build without issue, and overall, has had very few problems running most games, up until now. Yes, computer technology has advanced, and developers want to take advantage of it. But, I purposely bought a powerhouse of a machine when I bought this a few years ago and it's already out of date - and on components that are much more difficult, if not impossible, to swap out? This feels like planned obsolescence, and I'm very displeased. I'm actually really annoyed that an older-but-still-solid piece of hardware is now below the minimum specs for Survivor - and that I'm going to have to get a new computer to run the game - something that a) I don't nearly have the money for, and b) why do I need to replace a perfectly good machine? Sure, it's always been cranky about Windows Updates, but that's a software issue. (Broken Windows Updates have bricked this machine twice, thank -God- for backups!) Hardware-wise, though, it's still in good shape beyond one stuck key on the keyboard that I haven't really been bothered to fix yet! And, this sucks even more because, if I want to be active here on Tumblr, or in the JFO Fandoms over on Ao3 - well, I've already hit some spoilers, even just by virtue of stuff in the Ao3 tags, and not everyone is tagging their stuff as spoilers here on Tumblr, either. (And because I'm an artist in my Day Job, I can't just log off and walk away, I have 'work' accounts on a bunch of the socials where I'm also seeing Survivor posts, thanks to the joys of the various algorithms, even if I'm not subscribed/following/etc).

Most of my mutuals here are being very good about tags and/or putting things under the 'read more', but it's hard to avoid spoilers if I still want to be active in the JFO side of the Fandom, which, I do - I mean, I've still got a JFO era fanfic that needs more chapters!

Now, I can -try- and run Survivor on an unsupported graphics card and see what happens, but, odds are, it won't work. And if it doesn't, I'm stuck either getting things spoiled for me, or, watching a Lets Play and getting things spoiled for me, because there's absolutely no way I'll be able to afford a new computer any time soon. I guess this at least means I'm avoiding the Drama that has been the PC launch? /sigh/

[griefpersevering]

the ripples they cause

Read on AO3 🕷 Playlist 🕷 Buy me a cup of tea ☕

Chapter Nineteen: You Know Where to Find Me

Notes:

Hii everyone!! I hope you're having a lovely tuesday <33 This chapter includes the brilliant Jen from She-Hulk! There's very minor spoilers for the series if you haven't had a chance to watch it yet (you absolutely should, it's so good!) but I mostly wanted to say that we're sticking to all the canon of the show, except for her and Matt being a couple. They're cute, but unfortunately for canon, Matt and Foggy are cuter :D

Sneak peek:

Peter has only been sitting in a cell for twenty-two hours and he already regrets his decision.

He's made the right choice — he would sacrifice himself a thousand times to save his friends — but he didn't realise how boring prison would be. All the movies make it look dangerous and exciting, but when you're the only superhero in a block of cells designed for enhanced people, there isn't anyone to chat to.

If there wasn't a power dampening collar around his neck, he would literally be climbing the walls by now.

Peter will be the first to admit that he's never been the best at sitting with his thoughts for extended periods of time. But after explaining the plot and production history of all twelve Star Wars films to a brick wall, he's losing his mind.

When the metal door at the end of the corridor screeches open and Matt steps through, relief courses through him.

"Mr. Murdock!" he exclaims, walking up to the reinforced glass at the front of his cell. "I'm so happy you're here. I'm so bored."

Matt chuckles, but his expression quickly turns serious. "Are you alright?"

Peter sits down on the edge of his metal bunk. "I'm fine. They took the suit, but only a handful of people know my identity. The food's kinda gross."

"They've announced a trial date for you," Matt says, dragging a plastic chair over and taking a seat. "Monday."

Time has lost all meaning for him, but... "That's less than a week away!"

Matt folds up his cane. "I know. I imagine it's not the only thing they'll rig against you, but Foggy and Karen and I are doing everything we can to help."

"I know," Peter says. Foggy must be somewhere important if he isn't here with Matt, because the two are attached at the hip.

"Your friends are helping as well," Matt adds. "MJ has set up a campaign, and she has someone else your age financing the whole thing. He even offered to pay us."

"Ned?" Peter guesses. He has no idea how much a lawyer costs, but he's pretty sure Ned doesn't have that kind of money. The only thing he saves for is buying new LEGO sets.

"I believe his name was something ridiculous, like Flash," Matt says.

Peter groans. Of course Flash is inserting himself in this whole catastrophe. After finding out that his hero and the nerd he bullied were one and the same, he'd been insufferable. How on Earth he'd published his book so quickly is beyond him.

"I don't have much time," Matt says. "I need you to tell me every detail of what happened with Mysterio, if that's okay."

"I've been thinking about it, but I can't figure out the hole in his plan," Peter says. "The guy was clever. Even though he lost, he still managed to get his revenge."

"We're smarter. All we need is one piece of evidence, and the entire case starts to unravel." Matt rifles through his bag, pulling out a sheaf of papers covered in braille and a small recording device. "Remember, this is confidential. You need to tell me everything, even if it paints you in a bad light."

Matt insists on talking him through the entire school trip twice, including all the embarrassing moments. Peter lies a few times to omit MJ and Ned from the story, but tells Matt every other detail that he can remember.

"One more time," Matt says, pressing the button on his recording device again.

"Do we have to?" Peter groans. "There's nothing new to say." And he'd rather not keep relieving one of the worst few weeks of his life.

Matt lowers his voice. "Peter, I can tell when you're lying."

"What?"

"So either tell me what really happened, or we can sit here in silence until someone throws me out."

Peter swallows. He trusts Matt, and he understands why he's frustrated that he isn't telling him the whole truth. But how does he begin to explain what really happened? 'Oh, sorry for lying to you, but you see, Mysterio revealed my identity and then I nearly broke the multiverse. By the way, we've met before.'

Matt folds his arms and Peter sighs.

Continue reading on AO3!

[dmclemblems]

ajsdhgjkh yeah sorry shinon! he's good but i don't remember him ever being top for me, though i've probably done por 4 times and rd twice. i started using oscar because the nintendo power strategy guide said to plug the one bottleneck in the map on the chapter shinon and gatrie leave, because he's a brick wall. and they were right. he would never let me down etc etc. i think i gave him a custom forged lance called the BadGuyKiller. Kieran got the OscarBane, which was hot pink.

YEAHHHH SHISHI!!!

For some reason no matter how much I love other FE games, I always keep replaying the Tellius ones. I guess maybe in part it's because growing up I took to PoR a lot more? I started with FE7, but 7 and 8 weren't as strong for me and didn't keep me as interested. Also, I was kind of the shy nice girl growing up who stayed out of trouble, so I kind of grew up really admiring Ike. Even if I don't play either game for a year or two straight, I always come back to them and end up playing at least one of them once or twice through before taking a break again. Even though 4 is my favorite FE game, I guess between Tellius' gameplay, the characters and how I felt about those games growing up ends up pulling me back to them all the time.

NINTENDO POWER LITERALLY SAID USE OSCAR? Damn, I didn't give them enough credit. My sister subscribed to that magazine and I never read it. They're RIGHT though, I love plugging bottlenecks with him and Shinon. Chapter six is a pain in the ass but I rely on the two of them to cover the front, and in chapter eight I similarly have Oscar handle the front. Oscar dodges enough and he takes very low damage if he gets hit. My strategy was to keep a javelin equipped for most of chapter eight since a lot of the enemies used them as well, so he was always able to hit back and he took out the enemies in the front all by himself (which is pretty impressive at that point in the game considering how many enemies he'd be fighting by himself).

It's actually funny to me because he has no trouble at the front, but meanwhile Titania and Boyd are handling the right side of the map and kinda having trouble. Soren and Ike handle the left side (and eventually Ilyana if she even makes it down there in time to do much of anything lol), and I have Rhys run around healing as much as he can with Mia using her turns to shove him out of harm's way if he's in range of an enemy's distant attack when he's behind someone. Mia's too weak at that point for me to use her for anything else, so she's kinda just Rhys' support to keep him safe while he heals.

Agreed, Oscar never lets me down. IN FACT, IT'S ALMOST ALWAYS BOYD WHO LETS ME DOWN LMAO. Last run I did with a friend watching was fun because we were picking on Boyd lovingly. He was actually pretty damn for me in that run but whenever he screwed up we'd poke fun at him.

THAT'S SO FUNNY LOL. I love giving Oscar forged weapons. Actually, since they're so expensive if you want them to be really unique and not super close to an existing weapon that I don't make forged weapons that often at all. Generally Oscar is one of the few if not the only one in a playthrough who gets one. I always make it insanely OP, like, as OP as you literally make it lol. I make it green for him and give him all sorts of names for his weapons.

KIERAN GOT THE OSCARBANE AND IT WAS HOT PINK JUST LIEK HIS PERSONALITY. Kieran no you're supposed to fight the enemies, not your allies. SIR.

My friend in the playthrough I played with them watching tried to convince me not to use Oscar in chapter 28 and I firmly refused LOL. He basically handles the whole left side of the map by himself or has like, one other person with him helping out a little bit while Ike, Soren and Ranulf take the center and everyone else takes the right side.

Also this has nothing to do with Oscar but LISTEN. Have you ever put Vantage AND Adept on Ranulf? They behave differently in RD so it won't work the same, but in PoR Vantage always activates so your unit will always attack first if they're attacked by an enemy. Combine that with Adept and it's literally so broken because the sheer number of times I had Ranulf attack first and use Adept, attacking first twice and killing the enemy just for initiating combat was so bonkers it was like easy mode lmao.

It's kinda like when I discovered that putting Gamble on Shinon was stupid broken because he'd keep getting a 100 percent crit rate with a killer bow.

Oscar and Shinon are already broken and I somehow always seem to find ways to make them more broken. Then I got to add PoR Ranulf to that list... and honestly, once RD Ranulf gets Rend, he's basically as much of a monster as those two (especially if you're playing the endgame parts and you give him a Laguz Gem to be transformed for the entire battle LEL).

[jjmaybanksbaby]

Where It Leads (Rafe Cameron)

Summer IV

Part 07: Crashing Down

series masterlist | previous part

summary: A jarring family emergency forces you to consider the future of your relationship with Rafe Cameron.

a/n: I'm a little bit emotional about this series ending because I've had so much fun writing it! Enjoy the last part and, as always, please come share your reactions with me in my inbox. Okay, that's all from me!

word count: 2.1k words

Rafe Cameron knew how to text. He was somehow witty, charming, and hilarious all in less characters than a single tweet. Texting with most boys was like talking to a brick wall: single-syllable answers, unironic uses of punctuation, asking “What are you wearing?” before even listening to how your day went. Though, to be fair, Rafe had asked that same question a few times, which always earned him a sarcastic answer in return. Well, except for that one time.

You’d been forced to spill the beans about your dreamy summer romance to Alice and Kensie after one of Rafe’s funnier texts almost made you pee yourself laughing at the lunch table.

“Oh, so he’s a stud muffin,” Alice announced, peering over Kenzie’s shoulder at the photo on your phone.

“Please god don’t call anyone a stud muffin ever again Al,” Kenzie replied.

“What? The 80s are like making a comeback.”

“Yeah, not that,” you countered and Alice huffed.

“He’s totally hot though,” Kenzie said, handing the phone back to you. “And I kinda hate you for not telling us about him.”

You looked down at the picture. Rafe was kissing your check while you grinned up at the camera, the golden hour lighting made the whole thing look rather enchanting. It was your favorite picture of you and him.

“Oh shit,” Kenzie said causing you to look up from the phone. “You’re like in love in love with him.”

“What? No,” you protested. Yes, your brain corrected.

Kenzie glanced over at Alice for backup.

“Besides, I wasn’t hiding him. I just didn’t know if there was anything there to...tell,” you finished.

“I wish I had a handsome summer fling with spectacular cheekbones,” Alice sighed.

“Don’t let your boyfriend hear you saying that.” Kenzie chucked a fry off her tray at Alice who dodged it expertly.

“Oh, please. Matty knows I would dump his ass for someone who looks like a young Chuck Bass any day of the week. Gimme your phone. I wanna see the photos again y/n.”

“I seriously don’t know how you and Matthew have been together for two years,” Kenzie replied.

“Are you kidding? They’re practically made for each other,” you added.

“The phone, please,” Alice interjected. “I wanna thirst over your mans while my boyfriend is sucking up to his English teacher so she doesn’t fail him. Of course, I told him he needed to actually read Wuthering Heights and not just sparknotes it. But did he listen? No. I picked a real winner y’all,” she finished, taking the phone from your outstretched hands. “You sure Rafe doesn’t have any brothers? Not even like a half-step brother?”

So yeah, going great. Against the odds of three thousand miles, the whole thing was somehow working. Long-distance friends with benefits? Check. Well, except for those moments when that nagging feeling in your stomach came back and you’d start overthinking everything. His texts would sit, unread in your phone for days or even a whole week, slowly sinking to the bottom of your messages.

Then came the call from the Kildare Country Hospital in the early hours of a foggy April morning. You should have gone to sleep hours ago but were still up, desperately trying to cram Maria’s lines into your brain while also texting Rafe. The Sound of Music opened in three weeks and your director had already chewed you out twice for not being off-book, something about being an upperclassman and the lead, and what kind of an example were you setting for the rest of the program. Big speeches were kind of your director's thing, you learned to just ride them out.

Around 1 a.m. your phone ran with an incoming FaceTime call from Rafe. You pressed the green acccept button, a smile spread across your face as Rafe’s own filled the screen.

“Hey Broadway Star.”

“Hi Rafe.” The dim lighting of his bedroom made his feature especially striking. “What are you still doing up?”

“Can’t sleep. Plus you’re up too so. How’s the memorizing going?”

“Shitty,” you replied, closing your binder with a sigh. “I’m too tired to do anymore of it tonight anyway.”

“You know, I was thinking I could come to Oregon for your opening night?”

“Really?” The possibility of Rafe sitting in the audience made your heart race.

“Yeah, why not? I’ll ask Ward if I can borrow the plane that weekend and I bet Sarah’ll want to come too. I wanna see my girl kill it. I miss you.”

“I miss you too, Rafe. You know my friends think you’re hot.”

“Oh, do they?” Rafe replied, rolling over onto his back in his bed.

“Don’t let it get to your head, Cameron.”

The home phone ran but you ignored it, much more invested in your conversation with Rafe. The second time the hospital left a message. Your Nonna’s heart had given out. The prognosis wasn’t good. She had barely any time left.

Your heart dropped as the words echoed over the speaker of the answering machine.

“Rafe,” you said, cutting him off momentarily. “I gotta go. I’ll call you back later. I gotta-” you ended the call before Rafe even had the chance to respond. You dropped your phone on the kitchen table, dashing up the stairs to your parents’ bedroom. Your father was booking a flight for your mother back to the Outer Banks minutes later.

The end had come so quickly, so unexpectedly. It was almost like that made it harder. There'd been just enough time for your mom and uncle to get to the Outer Banks, sitting on each side of your Nonna as her final breaths passed through her lungs. Now, everyone was there to say goodbye one last time. Uncle Austin and his fiancé. Your mom and dad. Both your siblings. The entire population of Figure Eight.

☼☼☼

Rain drizzled down from the dark, gray clouds looming overhead. It was as if Mother Nature was mourning your Nonna too, hiding the sunshine away.

Three baby ducks followed their mama into the man-made pond at the edge of the cemetery. You watched their tiny feet kick up small waves disturbing the peaceful water and the tears silently slipped down your face.

The cars were waiting to take you back to your Nonna's house for the wake. The same house with the for-sale sign now stuck in the front yard. The for-sale sign with Rose's patronizing grin that you were starting to really hate. Your dad had handled that. Listing the house. He'd handled most of the funeral arrangement's actually because your mother had been too sunken into her grief to make any decision. Sending out the invitations, picking out your Nonna's casket, choosing the flowers. Your mother clung to him during the entire funeral, weeping into his shoulder.

“Y/n?” Rafe's voice called out from behind you and you turned to see him walked toward you. He’d stood at the back of the church with his family during the funeral. You had longed for him to be sitting in the first pew next to you, to have had his hand to hold onto to ground you, but it hardly would have been appropriate. Your Nonna would have sooner risen from the dead than have had a Cameron front row at her funeral.

As soon as he was close enough, Rafe reached for you, pulling your body tight into him. Your head landed on his chest and the sobs came moments later. God, he always smelled the same. He just let you cry, holding you close, smoothing his hand over your hair.

“I know you’re selling your grandma’s house but I was thinking you could stay with me for the summer," he said as your tears began to slow. It was hard to imagine that you wouldn't return to the Outer Banks once school let out. It was the first week of May already and you could feel the tourist-attracting town waking up. But selling the house just made more sense. Your older sister was already living her life in New York, a real adult life. Next summer, you'd be moving out too, headed to college. The house would sit empty for eight months out of the year, your family couldn't keep it and your uncle certainly didn’t want it. Selling it just had to happen.

You stepped back, slipping out of his embrace. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Rafe.”

“Why not?”

“Cause we’re like Romeo and Juliet.”

“I copied Cleo’s notes for that unit," he joked, trying to lighten to damp mood. “Plus I was never a fan of Leo DiCaprio so I didn’t finish the movie either.”

“It means we’re not supposed to be together, you and me. And whenever we try, the universe rips us apart. We hurt each other.”

Rafe shifted awkwardly on his feet, clearly wanting to reach for you again but stopping himself from doing it. “But I can't lose you.”

You reached your hand out, brushing away a strand of hair that had fallen in front of his eyes. “Oh Rafe, don’t you get it? You never really had me.” You stood up onto your tiptoes to kiss him just like you had the first time three years ago. Rafe barely parted his lips, kissing you back gently. Your hand cupped his face, your thump stroking over his cheek. It was a goodbye. Both of you knew it. It was an ending and this was your closure. You pulled away, your hand falling away from his face.

You couldn’t bring yourself to say the actual words. Your eyes fell to the ground. You needed to walk away now. You side-stepped Rafe but he grabbed your waist, turning you back around to face him.

“So that’s it? You’re not even gonna try to fight for us?”

“What even is there to fight for, Rafe? I’ve been fighting for us for the past four years. If we were supposed to be together that car wouldn’t have crashed into ours, I wouldn’t have fallen for Evan when I did, we wouldn’t be having this conversation at my Nonna’s funeral. What? Are we supposed to do long distance for all of college? I hardly know who I am right now. I have no idea who I’ll be in the next four years. Our future selves might not even like each other. I’m not gonna wait around for you Rafe and I would never ask you to do that for me.” You twirled the small, star charm between your fingers, a nervous habit you'd developed over the past year. His eyes dropped down to your neck momentarily and his adam's apple visibly bobbing as he swallowed his next weeks.

“You were it for me, you know. I tried to give a fuck about anyone else but I couldn’t get your gorgeous, stupid face out of my mind. I only wanted you.” Rafe paused gauging your reaction “I was falling in love with you.”

Your eyes wandered over his stoic expression. “The feeling was mutual, Rafe Cameron.”

He dropped your wrist but you both stood, not moving or saying anything. “Do you wanna walk me back to the car?”

“Yeah.” He reached for your hand, interlocking your fingers. Your other hand held onto his bicep so you walked together through the graveyard back to the parking lot.

The moment felt precious and delicate, like the fragile china your Nonna used to collect. You wondered what would happen to all that china.

Rafe placed a chaste kiss on your lips before opening the door of the car.

“I’ll miss you,” you said, the words hanging in the air meaning so much.

“Me too,” Rafe agreed.

You wanted one more kiss, one more passionate declaration of how much this all had meant but that would make leaving Rafe so much more impossible.

You climbed into the car, dropping Rafe’s hand in the process.

“See you around Cameron.” You knew it wouldn’t happen but it felt better than a goodbye.

He smiled back. “Maybe so.”

Perhaps Rafe was right and you’d both end up at a small liberal arts college in California taking the same second-year Econ class with a professor who always smelled like weed. Perhaps the stars would align and two of you would realize the universe wasn’t trying to keep you apart. It was just waiting for the right moment to show you that the love you had for each other was the soulmates, forever and ever kind of love. Perhaps you would get married and Sarah would be your maid of honor, of course. You’d buy back your Nonna’s house to raise your troubling-making kids in. Perhaps, you would find your way back and wake up each day and choose each other again and again.

Or perhaps, he'd always be your right-person-wrong-time. And, in the end, the passing days will steal away your memories of the blue-eyed boy from the Outer Banks.

taglist! @oreoenthusiast13

[daisybeewrites]

Sorry, I’m Married

word count?: 3.5k

warnings: canon-typical violence, i don’t describe it graphically tho, just a minor skirmish. happy ending :)

requested? no

ship: dousy/daisy johnson x daniel sousa & dad!coulson

hey guys! i wrote this on a whim after hanging out in a dousy group. i was inspired by the chat at the end of the fic. as always, thank you for reading!! and drink some water ;) fic under the cut!

Neon lights reflected off rough concrete walls as Daisy’s combat boots walked down the steps to the underground club. Light up signs glowed and glittery heels flashed as crowds of people surged and stepped on the technicolour dance floor. The sequins of her dress reflected spotlights that roved the entry area. There were booths with cushy red banquettes lining the walls near the bar, giving college girls a place to rest their feet and hotshot businessmen a table to sip beer. Currently, the club was full, young men and women crowding the bar and dance floor. Decades night, Daisy deduced, as most of the inhabitants were wearing flashy dresses or denim bell bottoms. Deke would’ve loved this, she thought. I wonder how Deke is doing…

Daisy’s mind drifted as the light up jukebox in the corner switched songs. She didn’t spot the target anywhere, so she pushed in a quarter, chose her favourite 80s hit, and watched as the jukebox queued her song. The vibrations of the speakers were reverberating through her, pumping her adrenaline up. Good, more energy for a fight if I need it. 

Three leather stools were open at the bar—one by itself, and two side by side. She nodded at the bartender and sat in the single empty seat. Her comms crackled in her right ear, reminding her of why she was here in the first place. 

“Dais, can you hear me?” She located where Coulson was speaking across the room, sitting in a wooden booth near the side exit. He casually leaned back and sipped his drink. 

“Loud and clear,” Daisy mumbled. 

“New intel from HQ just came in. The weapons the target is dealing? Alien tech.”

“Great, she said sarcastically,” said Daisy, clearly annoyed. 

Coulson laughed. “On your 3.” 

Daisy rested her elbow forward on the bartop, scanning the selection of alcohols as a premise to look down the row of people to her right. She noticed two young lads dressed in all black suits, carrying briefcases. There was no way these guys were in charge of the illegal operation. Well, at least they won’t be a problem if it comes down to a fight, she thought.

As Daisy’s eyes roamed the club, she locked eyes with a muscular, bodyguard-type with a small, raised scar over his eye. She smiled then turned around. She recognized the uniform he was wearing as standard bouncer garb, but his side-piece was not. CF380, Princetown standard issue. Daisy signaled his presence to Coulson. 

“These guys? Again?” 

Princetown was a group of rich, privileged sons of international diplomats and of heads of large corporations. They slipped through the FBI’s fingers like sand. Now, they had alien tech. No diplomatic immunity would allow them to get out of an arrest now. 

Coulson nodded behind her. She subtly turned her head and glanced in that direction. Wearing an overly expensive silk suit and holding a glass of champagne, stood Luca Casagrande. Son of the Italian Minister of foreign affairs. Notorious for his parties, wealth, and lack of self-control. He winked at a blonde waitress who slipped him a piece of paper, which was very obviously not a bill. Daisy rolled her eyes. Criminals these days are so stupid, she thought. 

Coulson bit back a laugh at Daisy’s reaction. “Alright, Daisy, you’re up.”

“Remind me again why I was chosen for this part of the mission?” she murmured while sipping her drink to hide her words.

“Because, you’re good at it.” Coulson went quiet for a second then added, “And I'm not Casagrande’s type.”

Daisy flashed her eyes in Coulson’s direction, frustrated. She mentally went over the calming exercises May taught her. Deep breath, exhale. Let’s do this.

Daisy slid off the barstool, and approached Casagrande slowly. He only looked her direction when she sidled up next to him. 

“Hey, sweetheart. What’s a beautiful girl like you doing out here all by yourself?” A smooth, accented voice inquired.

Daisy bottled up a sarcastic remark and stocked it on the shelf for later use. Only Daniel is allowed to call her sweetheart. 

“Well, I was hoping,” she blinked up at him, batting her eyelashes. “to find some product. Heard you had all the good stuff. I'm lucky I even caught you here, considering your reputation.”

“Geez. Laying it on a little thick aren’t we?” Coulson couldn’t help it. The snort Daisy covered up as a cough was too hilarious.

Luca smiled. It was charming, but unsettling. “Oh? And what reputation would that be?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Daisy countered. She looked around before continuing, “Look, I've got pressure on me to deliver. I’d appreciate it if we talked business before pleasure.”

 “Hard to get.” Luca’s eyes sparkled. “Alright. Let’s talk business.”

He leaned over the bar and signaled the bartender to bring him two glasses of whiskey on the rocks. Once a glass was in his hand, he gestured to Daisy’s. “You don’t drink?”

“Not when I'm on the clock. My employers frown upon it.” 

Casagrande nodded. “I see. So, what type of product were you looking for?”

“Anything I can sell. Uncle Sam called and said they need a next gen advantage for soldiers. Weapons, maybe?” She ran a finger down the lapel of his suit. “They pay generously.”

“You work for the US military.”

“We have a... mutual understanding.” Daisy flashed a brilliant smile. It was kind of fun playing an undercover persona. 

Luca studied her face. “I don’t get details?”

Daisy scoffed, “Of course not. Son of a foreign diplomat, it’s a risk the US can’t take. If other countries found out…”

“Yes, I understand," He responded carefully. 

“And I understand that you also do some dirty business with governments.”

A menacing half-smile rose on his face. “Only the beautiful ones.”

Looking up into his eyes, Daisy felt the same disgust that had been worn by everyone at the mission briefing. Au contraire, Luca seemed to find Daisy extremely attractive. 

“Why don’t we—”

“No.” Daisy internally cringed, but on the outside she seemed relaxed and blasé. She risked a glance at Coulson, to see his reaction. His entire body was rigid. She didn’t blame him. Hearing some douchebag proposition your daughter...yulgh. She wished Daniel was here to watch her back, too... this guy was getting under her skin. Everything about Casagrande pushed her buttons. 

“No?”

“No,” Daisy affirmed, tilting her head. “Business first. We can talk about any other deals after.” 

“But there is a possibility?” He cheekily remarked. 

Not a chance in hell, Daisy thought. “Maybe. But for now, I need to move product ASAP.”

Luca mulled thos over and sipped the burning whiskey. “I may have some contacts that could help you. In return, what will you give me?”

Though the question was innocent, his intentions were obvious. That was exactly what she wanted. 

“Depends on how good the product is.” She stepped a little closer “It’s a little crowded in here, don’t ya think?”

He pushed off the bar, inches from her. He smelled like overly expensive cologne, and not the good kind. “I'm meeting some business associates out back in a few minutes. We’ll make a deal after that.”

“Would they happen to have anything I could—”

“Sorry, sweetheart, I do business privately.”

Daisy faked a sweet smile and resisted the urge to punch him. 

Luca took two steps toward the back door, then turned around and strutted back. He tilted his head towards her. “A good luck ki—?”

BRing. BRing. Bzzzzz. 

Best. Timing. Ever. Daisy shot Luca an apologetic look before picking up. 

“Hello? Oh, Dad! One sec.” Daisy took the phone off her ear, and whispered to Luca, “It’s my Dad. He’s in the hospital. Doesn’t know what my real job is.”

She brought the phone back up to her ear as Luca irritatedly glanced around. 

“Dad? Yeah... No, I'm fine, how are you feeling?... That’s great, Dad.” She winked at Luca and held up a finger. Daisy was glad he didn’t notice Coulson over her shoulder, also on the phone. 

“I'm with some friends…” Luca raised his eyebrows. “Luca Casagrande... He does business with my marketing firm.”

Daisy waved Luca away after noticing him checking his Rolex twice in ten seconds. He nodded and headed out back. She made sure he was out of earshot before alerting Coulson.

“Coulson, he’s headed out.”

“Yup, QJ-6 is on the way. I’ll stay to watch his lackeys.”

Daisy gave the bartender a tip and walked towards the back door, grabbing her gauntlets from behind the bar. He dipped his chin and continued wiping down the counter.

As she walked into the chilly night air, Daisy was greeted with silence. Droplets of water dripped onto the leather of her boots from the rooftop. The concrete crunched in the darkness of the alley. Light from the streetlamps was scarce, melding shadowy corners with the dim alleyway.. Daisy could hear faint music through the brick walls of the club. A smirk formed on her face as her pick from the jukebox played. Walking towards the street, she checked behind the moldy trash bins for a sign that Casagrande was hiding. The opening guitar grew louder as the safety of a gun clicked off behind her. 

“So,” Daisy raised her hands up. It was a trap. “what happened to your business associates?”

Luca chuckled behind her. 

“You’re not stupid. You can figure it out.”

Daisy slowly turned around to face him. 

“You bluffed to see if I would follow you.” She wasn’t surprised. She had counted on this. “You’re a decent liar.”

“So are you.” Luca lowered the gun a bit. “Who are you? CIA?”

“That’s classified.” 

Luca laughed, haphazardly slinging the pistol to the side in a grand gesture. “Of course it is.”

“I wasn’t lying when I said that the government and I have a mutual understanding.”

“But that isn’t the whole truth, is it?” 

Daisy smirked. “Of course not.”

Technically, this was true. Her status as a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent was protected knowledge, no one but people inside her agency and a handful high-ranking world intelligence officers were aware.

Daisy decided he might as well know who she was. He was going to be locked up in a max-security cell pretty soon, anyway.

He fell against the wall as Daisy hit him with a small quake, just enough to get her point across. His expression was one of pure shock.

“You- Y- You’re…”

“Mar—”

“Daisy, what’s going on?” Coulson must have felt the vibrations. She didn’t think she had hit Luca that hard. Daisy could hear the quinjet approaching, the comforting vibrations of the engine helping to calm her nerves. She stepped toward Luca.

“You have two options: come peacefully with me, or I call the cavalry to take you in by force.”

Luca stayed on the ground, silent. He reminded Daisy of a pouting toddler. 

This toddler had a few tricks up his sleeve. 

Coulson’s voice came through her ear. “Daisy, do you ha—”

Daisy’s blood ran cold as she received static from the other line.

“Coulson? Coulson?!”

Wide brown eyes turned to watch Casagrande’s smirk grow. 

“Problem?" He said smugly. 

Daisy quickly knocked him out with the mini-ICER she kept inside her boot and ran back inside. Opening the solid metal door to the inside of the club, she registered the panicked screams from the main room. As she hurtled through the plain hallway towards the crowds, she wished she had a way to tell the backup team that they were flying into trouble. He must’ve known we’d be here. How did he know we’d be here? 

The walls were a blur as the confusion and fear from the civilians in the club became palpable. The door squeaked on its hinges as Daisy threw it open. She didn’t see Coulson anywhere. Actually, she couldn’t see anything at all. An EMP. Cool. Fun. Alright. That’s fine. 

It’s all fine.

Wandering the crowds, Daisy tried to find a way to contact the team. Surely they had a landline in here? 

The bartender pulled her aside as she passed him. He silently pointed to the jukebox. It was the only thing still on and functioning. Of course, Daisy didn’t know how she hadn’t seen it before! 

She walked to the jukebox and searched the sides for a dial, a button, something... Aha! She unlatched the panel and bent down to dial Piper’s number. She pressed the call button while her vision grew blurry. Her eyelids drooped. A sluggish head turn towards the dance floor gave a view of unconscious bodies asleep next to each other. Daisy tried to stand, to walk to the nearest victim of the sleeping gas. A burning zap that seemed to travel through her veins rendered her unconscious. I have to find Coulson…

Daisy knew she probably shouldn’t have left Casagrande in the alley by himself. She was playing right into his hand.

Coulson was more important.

Coulson. What would he do?

Daisy slowly tried to open her eyes. She felt like she had a hangover. The light was dim, the floor beneath her cold as ice. Her hearing slowly came back as she took in her surroundings. A pair of black dress shoes blurred into her frame of vision. 

“Hey, you’re awake.” Coulson’s voice flooded her with relief.

“What happened? Where…?”

Coulson helped her sit up against a rough stone wall. “I have no clue. Best guess? An Italian castle.”

Daisy was suddenly very awake. “We’re in Italy?”

“Hey, I said best guess.” Coulson pointed his fingers to the ceiling. “I heard footsteps up there earlier.”

Daisy just nodded. Last time she was in Italy, she had a hell of a lot better time. For starters, no one zapped her with— wait, what was she hit with?

“What was that weapon I was hit with? It felt like it was melting my insides.” The thought scared her. The only other time she had felt that type of pain was when... she didn’t like to think about it. 

“You know the alien tech that Casagrande was running?” Daisy nodded. “Yeah, it was that.”

A loud groan solidified Daisy’s frustration. Her eyes closed while she tried to concentrate. She tried to feel any vibrations near her, to soak up anything that could signal where they were. Instead of feeling the vibrations of a mountain or a plane, she felt footsteps. Coming closer, closer... Daisy opened her eyes. 

Luca entered the chilly cell through the thick steel door. She would have quaked him back about a hundred feet if it weren’t for Coulson’s hand on her arm. 

“You two seem comfortable. Can I get you a drink? Water? Coffee?” His smile was smug and irritating.

Coulson replied before Daisy could. “No, we’re good thanks. How about instead, you give us some answers. Starting with: where are we, and who’s your source?” His voice got harder and colder as he went on. Luca acted unfazed. 

“No. You are insurance. You have physical evidence of my illegal trades. I was going to leave you on the curb, but then this guy,” Luca pointed over his shoulder at a soldier then slapped the short lad on the back. Daisy recognized him as one the short lads with briefcases at the bar. “This guy had to go and shoot you with the Widow’s Bite!”

Coulson's eyes grew wide in recognition. Daisy could connect the dots herself.

“You stole Black Widow’s weapons?” They said in unison. Coulson and Daisy looked at each other and fell silent. By Daisy’s profile, if they kept acting surprised and in awe, he would keep giving them answers. 

“Yes, I did. Amazing right?” Luca stared off into the distance. “Last month I hired a thief to get into the Avenger’s Compound. She got a copy of Stark’s old hard drive, picked up some old relics, modified them with alien metal stolen from Hydra. But every time I tried to open it, it would corrupt my servers. I took the damn thing to every hacker I knew, now they all want to kill me because I crashed their servers. Some of them used to be part of the Rising Tide, when they were still young and hotheaded. They told me about a hacker named Skye. She disappeared, never heard from again. She has no information on her. She has no records. Not even in the top intelligence departments of America. She doesn’t exist.

“But Daisy Johnson does. Daisy Johnson, a hacker who rose in Skye’s place. Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.”

“And you need us to get to her,” Coulson finished. “I hate to burst your bubble, but we’re expendable. You’re better off throwing us in the ocean than you are waiting for her to come.”

Luca seemed to be seriously considering this. Then he nodded. You’re right, I need to up the ante. Raise the stakes a little.”

He jerked a thumb over his shoulder as he turned on heel and swaggered down the hallway. “Bring them.”

Two soldiers came in to get Daisy and Coulson. They reached down to grab Daisy, and she swiftly brought her head forward to hit theirs. Stunned, the soldier took a step back, giving Daisy time to stand up before she gave a hard kick to his stomach. The other soldier was similarly impaired, having taken a startlingly strong punch to the jaw from Coulson. The crack! of the bone echoed off the stone walls. Daisy quaked them against the wall for good measure, realizing they hadn’t taken her gauntlets. Coulson was waiting by the door. 

“Let’s go.” 

They ran through the halls, following where they thought Casagrande might have gone, stopping in several rooms on the way to hide from Casagrande’s soldiers. They ran into him at the front of what was, indeed, a stone castle. He stood on the uneven steps gazing out at rolling hills and cottony clouds hung high above a choppy lake. The wind blew hard, just enough to make you wish for a sweater from someone warm and comforting. It was all quite picturesque. 

Except for the criminal standing in front of them. 

“Congrats, you escaped! I’m so glad.” Luca smiled and opened up his arms. 

“Somehow this guy still sounds smug. We just escaped from his prison and this guy still thinks he’s won.” Coulson turned to Daisy. 

Daisy shook her head and shouted, “Hey, Luca! The fight’s not finished yet!”

“Really, sweetheart? Because it looks to m—”

He was interrupted by a violent quake in his direction. She strided over to where he was struggling to get up. 

“It looks like what? I can’t hear you.” Daisy rested her hands on her hips. 

“It looks as if you are lost. Even if you escape, you have no way to get home,” he wheezed. 

Daisy rolled her eyes. Coulson walked up behind her, squatting down beside Luca and using a hand on his shoulder to keep him in place. 

“We’re resourceful. And while we were hiding from guards in some of your fancy tech rooms, we found an old sat phone. They’re easy enough to use, all we had to do was phone a friend and tell them exactly where we are,” Coulson explained. 

“Ah, but you don’t know where we are, sweetheart.” His rebuttal was pointed at Daisy. She decided it was her turn to prove him wrong. 

“See, that’s where you’re wrong. You counted on us not being able to crack your hard drive’s encryption and get past your feeble firewalls. That took less than five minutes. The only remotely hard part about hacking you to find our coordinates was trying to read everything in Italian.” Daisy laughed. 

Luca tried the wiggle away from them. “If you have my hard drive, then you know there isn’t anything of importance on there.”

As she pulled a pair of handcuffs out of her boot, Daisy exchanged a look with Coulson. 

“You’re right, there isn’t anything of value on that hard drive,” she said. “There are about 100 other files I downloaded from your personal computer that do have important intel, though.” 

Coulson pulled a face and sucked in a breath. “Yikes.”

“So, I guess if you’re arresting me, there isn’t any chance we could ever do business, if you know what I mean?”

Daisy mentally pulled that bottle off the shelf and dusted off her sarcastic remark. 

“Sorry, I’m married.”

Daisy locked the cuffs into place and stood Casagrande up. Two quinjets touched down thirty minutes later, one with a team of agents to search the castle, and one to take Daisy and Coulson home. Agent Piper met Daisy on the ramp of QJ-6, something metallic and glittery in her hand. 

“Thanks for holding onto it.” Daisy hugged Piper before taking her ring back. 

“No problem. Wouldn’t want this rock to get lost in the field!” she laughed. 

Daisy slipped the smooth metal on her finger and sagged into the jump seat next to Coulson. She rested her head on his shoulder, softly gazing at her hand. 

“I can’t wait to be home with Daniel.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: heeeey! this fic was inspired by @starkmaiden ‘s post in a dousy group i’m in. thank you!! if you have a request, question for me, or want to be added to my taglist go visit my ask box! i love each and every one of you :)

[somersetmummy]

(A/N) This is a TNA one shot, taking place immediately following book 1 chapter 12 (the gala balcony scene). Characters, some storyline and some dialogue property of Pixelberry.

Story told from point of view of MC Katie Hide. Internal character thoughts are written in italics.

I tried to think about how they would get through the rest of the gala after their little extra curricular activities on the balcony….so here it is!

Original characters: Katie Hide (MC), Sam Dalton, Vivienne Dalton, Mason Sr Dalton, Carter

New characters: Laney, Ryan

Content warning: Some light adult language

Summary: Nanny Katie Hide and her boss Sam Dalton finally take their relationship to the next step on the night of the gala, but just when they should be feeling elated, things spiral quickly. Can they get through the rest of the evening together now that things have changed for good?

Word count: 3462 (I’m out of control!)

- Bonus social edits at the end -

Alone on the balcony, looking out over the city's twinkling lights, she should've been basking in the afterglow of the best sex of her life but instead she feels empty. Her resolve held strong in front of Sam as he skulked off seemingly full of regret but now, her mind races through every minute detail of what had just happened.

Instead of taking the time to carefully ingrain every delicious detail of their time together into her memory, she painfully second guessed every move, every touch, every whispered promise. Once her exhausted mind began to fray she decided to sweep the whole thing under the carpet determined to save face, for now. Collecting herself, she absentmindedly ran her fingers up and down her arms, goose bumps standing proud, finally giving in to the cold night air.

On her way back towards the ballroom, while wondering how the hell she was going to get through the rest of the evening, she prolongs her return to reality by ducking into one of the lavish bathrooms to freshen up.  The room is quiet, an older lady leaves as she enters, another younger girl, probably around her age, is refreshing her makeup by one of the opulent vanity's. She sits down on the plush velvet ottoman in the middle of the vanity area with a sigh, not really sure what to do next.

"Well you look like you've been through the ringer!"

Turning towards the kind voice, the girl who was doing her makeup, a warm glow pours out to her as the stranger looks her up and down with genuine concern. Her face is one of those which feels familiar, like someone she could’ve known her whole life. It is enough to encourage her to open up a little and feels like a relief to have someone to talk to after feeling so alone out on that balcony.

"I'm sort of having the best night of my life as well as the worst. And to top it all off I've left my purse in the main room..." She gestures towards her untidy hair and slightly smudged makeup by way of an explanation.

The stranger offers a knowing look in reply.

“So are you here with someone? Your dress is divine by the way."

Smoothing the front of her dress, Katie replies absentmindedly, "Oh no, I'm just here with my boss, filling in an empty seat at the last minute." Hesitant to share more with someone she'd just met, she kept the more intimate details to herself.

"Me too, well sort of. I'm a stylist, one of my clients insisted I join them to make sure they look perfect all night long, god forbid her dress creases when she sits down for dinner!" She waves Katie over to the vanity and the open make up case. "Here, use whatever you need." She continues watching as Katie gratefully grabs a brush and some powder. "I'm really just starting out but figure these sorts of events are great publicity if I can dress the right people. I mean they're all living on another planet of course but they love to be in the spotlight and gush about their outfits, which is great for me!"

The pair chat easily together for a while before Katie glances at the time on her phone screen realising she'd been gone much longer than anticipated. She’d enjoyed having an ally and getting her mind off the car crash of a moment with Sam, truth be told, she’d much rather stay here in the safety of her mirrored cave and the kindness of a stranger than plaster a smile on her face and return to the Dalton’s table. With a wistful smile she turns to the stranger.

"I suppose I should be getting back, although I can't say I'm looking forward to it."

"I'm Laney by the way." She holds her hand out to Katie and they share a gentle shake.

"I'm Katie. I've really enjoyed hiding out in here with you, thanks for everything." Leaving Laney to pack up the overly large purse full of beauty treasures, Katie heads back towards the bustling ballroom. Barely making it into the room, Laney breathlessly catches up to her holding out a business card.

"Hey, I thought maybe we could meet up for a coffee sometime, you know if you want to have someone in the real world to spend time with!" She points over to someone across the room and continues animatedly, "You said you went to NYIT right? I'm sure my friend Ryan would love to meet you too, he did his Grad course there and always loves a trip down memory lane!"

Taking the card, Katie’s eyes are drawn to Sam over Laney's shoulder. He looks just as he did before the balcony, the ever professional businessman, as if nothing had ever happened. He gives a slight tip of his head in Katie’s direction, motioning for her to join him back at the table.

The new friends share a quick hug promising to catch up soon and she makes her way over to Sam who won't quite meet her eye. Despite the frostiness between them, he's a gentleman at heart and doesn't think twice about pulling out her chair, tucking it in gently as she sits. As the bustle of dinner being served continues around them, the thorny silence between them grows thick with unspoken feelings.

After a whirlwind of Sam and his parents catching up over the exploits of various family friends and tales of the boys, Vivienne turns to smile at Katie.

"Now dear, we're being rude talking around you as though you're not here. Sam tells me you're quite the budding scientist yourself?"

She looks to Sam to see him offering a helpless smile and shrug of the shoulders and can’t help but wonder whether he’d shared anything about his previous employees with his mother, or if she was the first. As Katie pulls her eyes away from Sam’s, she pushes down all the feelings which bubbled up inside her and plasters on her most professional smile.

"Yes, Mrs Dalton, I have a Masters in Chemistry and up until recently was managing projects for Panacea Labs."

Being the expert that she is at reading people, Katie astutely notices how Mr Dalton’s ears prick, he clearly didn't know that there was more to her than being 'just a nanny', whatever that means.

"Please dear, you're practically family, call me Vivienne."

A warm glow fills her body at the thought of being accepted into the fold of the Dalton family. Smiling back at Vivienne, she continues to share stories of her experiences in the industry, her passion for science and her love for exploring through the twins eyes.

"Mickey and Mason are such a brilliant example of how a love of science can be developed at a young age. They're so curious and passionate about exploring, it's such a pleasure to be a part of."

Next to her, barely able to disguise the pride he feels for her, Sam tries his best to remain outwardly impassive while watching the rest of the table listen attentively, completely captivated by her storytelling. He'd meant it earlier on the balcony when he'd agreed that she was meant to be by his side, a partner not a secret he had to hide his feelings for. He just didn't know how to make it a reality, trapped within his own life. But in this moment, his feelings bubble to the surface and it takes everything he has not to take her in his arms in front of everyone and let them come flooding out for all to see.

After all, it wasn’t Katie’s fault that his true feelings for her hit him like a tonne of bricks earlier that evening while he watched her effortlessly talk Selene into keeping her shares. In front of his parents no less. Right there, everything he loves about her shone out for everyone to see and he realised he was deeply and helplessly in love. It just wasn’t with his fiancée. Hell that's the reason he took Katie out to the balcony in the first place, to steal a moment to share how he really feels but as always he was too much of a coward to do anything about it in fear or letting everyone else down and jeopardising his sons future.

He knows that the only way to try to push through it all is to detach himself from Katie as much as possible, even if it means becoming the bad guy. In his mind, she deserves better, she deserves the damn fairytale and that's just not something he's able to give.

As they move through the plentiful courses of dinner, Mason Sr continues to interrogate Katie on her knowledge and opinions of various scientific and business theories, although his directness falters as the meal goes on and they both seem to enjoy the lively debates. Vivienne occasionally interjects with questions of her own about Katie’s family, her life back in England and whether it's difficult to be far from home. To Katie, it almost feels like she’s on a 'meet the parents' date which in her mind could be going a lot worse.

When coffee is finally offered, Mason Sr stands abruptly, eyes focussed on Sam.

“Ladies, while this evening's discussions have been...interesting, I think it's time we get down to some business." He nods curtly at Sam before gesturing towards a quieter bar area off the back of the room.

Sam stands to follow him but not before turning to Katie and instinctively placing a hand on her shoulder. She involuntarily shudders at his touch as her mind races back to the last time they touched on the balcony.

"This shouldn't take too long, will you be ok here?"

"Of course she will darling, I'm not going to bite her!" Vivienne cuts in before she can reply. Sam nods in approval towards her and lingers for a moment before walking away to meet his father. Katie's shoulder still tingling at the memory of his touch.

Katie looks across the ballroom taking in the general splendour and jovial atmosphere while Vivienne takes the opportunity to really look at her, contemplating how much to share with her. After taking a few sips of coffee, she turns herself to fully face Katie and offers a warm smile.

"I can see why the boys are so taken with you...all of them."

The honesty of her comment takes Katie by surprise. Unsure how to respond, she slowly turns to meet Vivienne’s eye, raising her eyebrow slightly in question.

"You're all the things Sam said you were. He was right when he told me we'd get on well."

The intensity of Vivienne’s gaze is so strong Katie daren't look away.

"I want to thank you for everything you've done for them all. They've come alive again since having you in their life. Poor Sara was taken from him far too soon, from us all really...it was all so hard on Sam and the boys." She trails off clearly lost in memory. "I know he cares for you and wants you to feel part of the family."

“Shit” she thinks to herself. Feeling like a rabbit caught in headlights, Katie's mind races. Does she know? How can she, they've only met once before, surely that's not enough to make her suspicious?

"I think Sam's just taken pity on me because I'm so far from home and he knows I don't have any family around. He and the boys have been so gracious in making me feel welcome."

Hoping she sounds convincing she takes a sip of coffee, relishing the opportunity to hide her blushing cheeks behind the cup. Vivienne suddenly looks up with Katie follow her gaze over her shoulder. Behind her, Laney is standing with a cowboy-next-door handsome man in tow, a welcome interruption. His dirty blonde hair is slightly unkempt, his frame more lean than Sam's but he still carries an athletic look, he smiles charmingly at Katie.

“Excuse me" Laney directs to Vivienne before turning to speak to Katie. “This is my friend Ryan who I was telling you about earlier."

Katie reaches out to shake his hand which he is already holding out towards her.

"I hear you're a fellow NYIT grad? You look far too respectable to have hung out in the sort of dives I used to find myself in!"

"Try me..." she challenges with a twinkle in her eye.

Laney rolls her eyes with boredom and escapes, business card in hand, to fawn over an awkwardly dressed woman at another table.

"Would you like to dance? I promise not to break out the old NYIT match day chant moves!"

She can't help but laugh at his natural charm. After looking to Vivienne, who waves her hand in approval, she lets Ryan lead her out to the dance floor where they sway together at ease in each other's company reminiscing. It’s a far cry from the intimate dance with Sam earlier that evening, instead Katie could relax into it knowing that she wasn’t trying to hide anything, and it felt freeing.

As Sam's discussion, or more accurately argument, with his father comes to an end he heads back to the table where he notices his mother is sitting alone.

“Where's Katie?" He asks forgetting to hide the panic in his voice, worried for the second time that evening, after she had disappeared to the bathroom for half an hour, that Katie had thought better of compromising herself for him and fled the gala.

Vivienne nods towards the dance floor, Sam's eyes follow and a bolt of jealousy hits him right in the heart as he sees her in the arms of another man.

With a steely glare he starts towards her but is stopped by Vivienne's hand firmly holding him back by his arm.

“Leave her be, she's enjoying herself."

Letting out an almost inaudible sigh he sits down next to his mother but can't pull his eyes away, so enthralled that his mother's voice is almost a whisper in the background.

"She really is wonderful darling, I know even your father is impressed, of course he'll never say it." Her arm still resting on his, she studies Sam's face before continuing, "What a shame you’d not met her sooner.”

Allowing himself for a moment to hope that his mother's glowing reference suggests she is in approval of his relationship with Katie becoming something more, Sam smiles and leans forward ready to gush even more. He catches himself just in time as the ever repeating voices in his head remind him of his responsibility and everyone else's expectations of him, instead he brings it back to the boys.

"Yes she's brilliant with Mason and Mickey, they're lucky to have her."

Dancing and talking together with Ryan, Katie had almost forgotten about Sam and their earlier tryst on the balcony, grateful for the distraction and if she was being honest the attention. It's not every day that she goes to the effort of dressing up at the last minute and schmoozes the un-scmoozable to help her sort-of-boyfriend look good, it's nice to have someone sweep her off her feet and put her first for once.

"Your boyfriend doesn't seem too happy about us dancing together" Ryan nods towards Sam who is trying to get their attention, his parents behind him appear to be getting ready to leave.

"He's not my boyfriend."

Ryan's eyes widen sensing an opportunity. “Well I guess that's good news for me...can I call you sometime, take you out for dinner?"

She drops her gaze, shaking her head slightly.

“I'm sorry, I don't think it's a good idea..." trailing off, he gently lifts her chin to look up at him.

"But you're single...?"

"No, I...it's...it's complicated" she stutters while looking over his shoulder at Sam, who looks less than thrilled.

"Well, if you change your mind, Laney has my number." With that, he kisses her hand and watches the silk of her gown cling to her hips as she walks away.

Returning to the table, Mason Sr takes Katie’s hand and shakes it almost warmly.

“Pleasure to see you again Katie. Excellent damage control with Selene earlier...very impressive."

He moves to Sam, impassively shaking his hand as Vivienne envelopes her in a hug, kissing each cheek.

"Wonderful to see you again dear, give those grandsons of mine one of these from me!"

Katie smiles tenderly back at her, nodding in agreement.

After the Dalton's leave, Katie and Sam remain at the table, sipping their drinks in awkward silence, steadily interrupted by acquaintances of Sam's wanting to talk business. Finally, noticing Katie’s arm propping up her tired head, Sam stands.

“I think that's enough shop talk for one night, let's get you home."

Waiting for the limo to pull to the front of the building Sam notices her shiver in the cold night air. He takes off his jacket and wraps it around her shoulders, the most contact they’ve had all evening since being intertwined on the balcony together. His gaze lingers on hers, neither able to look away. She tries to read his thoughts as she looks deep into his eyes but all she sees is a muddle of pain, confusion and longing. It doesn't make her feel any better.

"Mr Dalton..." the driver says with a small cough as he stands by the open limo door.

Sam pulls away and walks her over to the limo with his hand hovering behind the small of her back, not daring to touch. Once settled in their seats it doesn't take long for the gentle motion of the car to send Katie to sleep, her head lulling and dropping onto Sam's shoulder.

It takes everything he has for him not to wrap his arms around her, his mind conflicted thinking of the nights events. The incredible connection they shared on the balcony, the fire within him burning hotter and brighter than ever before, his mother's glowing review, hell even his father had been impressed and suggested during their conversation in the bar that Katie’s role within the Dalton empire might be wasted as just a nanny. But none of these thoughts could quite suppress his feelings of guilt at falling for another woman, his responsibility to his sons, the business and their legacies. At least not in his mind.

Back in the penthouse, Sam makes his way into the open plan living area to find, thinking him for his help with the boys. Katie hangs back, not wanting to make small talk in front of Carter, who is incredibly astute and would no doubt piece together that things were not as they seemed.

"Miss Hide, you're a vision!"

Walking towards the elevator, Carter beams at her like a proud dad seeing his daughter on her wedding day.

“I didn't get the chance to see you before you left, my my..."

"Thank you Carter. And thank you for watching the boys, I hope they weren't too much trouble?!"

He taps his nose, keeping secret whatever mischief they got up to that evening. She smiles back at him knowingly as he steps into the elevator and the doors close.

As she turns back towards the living room she is halted by Sam standing right in front of her, so close, she almost crashes into him. Sheepishly she hands him his jacket as he offers a bottle of water in exchange.

‘You should never go to bed dehydrated" he blurts out, trying to fill the gaping silence.

“Sam...."

"Goodnight Katie, thank you for your help this evening, I appreciate you coming."

Unable to muster up enough energy to argue push any further, Katie drops her gaze to the floor as she shakes her head disappointedly. She walks away without a word, her heart aching more than she thought possible.

TAG List: @shewillreadyou @chemist-ana @txemrn @silma-words @thefrenchiemama @secretaryunpaid @sfb123

- Bonus - photo posted by Katie the morning after followed by a conversation with Jenny (before Sam drops the Italy bombshell and she was supposed to have the day off!)

[hopeless-lovex0]

I HAVE A DREAM (PART 14)

Kim Hongjoong Fanfic

Warning: Angst. Cheating. Heartbreak. Cursing. Fluff.

Hello fellow atiny’s and kpop stans 👋🏼 Part 14 of I Have A Dream is here and it's a roller coaster. For anyone confused by the timestamps, I'll give a brief explanation.

(Y/N left for 3 months which would be 3 months into her pregnancy. Ateez moves into the small village for a month and by the time they leave Y/N is already on her 4th month. Throughout her 4th month all the way to the start of her 8th she stayed in the village till finally she moved back to Seoul with her brother to spend her 8th month there till she finally entered her 9th month.)

It's all a little confusing but I hope you guys are still able to understand. With that explained I hope you guys like this weeks update, and I promise next weeks is gonna be wild 😉 Without further ado here's part 14 of IHAD

5 months later...

Various colorful lights and music played all around the city of Seoul, groups of people gathering all over the place. Multiple banners hanged all over the streets, some promoting different idols others promoting food or drinks.

In the middle of the bustling city stood a very pregnant woman, her big belly covered by a light pink thick sweater and black jacket. She waddled her ways towards a small cafe located a couple of ways away from her brother's apartment.

Y/N felt too exposed, the amount of people around her was way more than the people back in the village. To her that small village miles away was considered home, the small brick house holding so many meaningful memories in such a short time.

After the guys and her brother had left, Y/N continued her life as normal or as normal a 4-month pregnant woman could get. She continued to go to work, Mrs. Park pestering her 10x as much since she didn't have someone to care for her like her brother. She could take care of herself, but once in a while she missed her brother massaging her ankles, or wooyoung and Jongho trying their hardest to make her laugh.

In the time that they were gone, Y/N had managed to make more friends. She meet Kyung Mi’s girlfriend, the two of them complementing each other perfectly. She also meet the rest of Mrs. Park's family, Mr. Park accepting her into their comfortable home with open arms. She felt so at home with them and she honestly doesn't know how she'll be able to be away from them while in Seoul.

During her 6th month, Y/N made her way to Seoul to visit the hospital she was planning on giving birth in. She only stayed for a week, and that week was the best one in her life.

She reunited with the guys again, swarming her in a group hug the minute they visited her in her brother's apartment. They took her out to eat that day, as if they were celebrating something enormous. Thinking back on it now, she laughs at the memory.

She talked to each one of them whenever they could, San calling and texting her almost every night. Sometimes they would talk about meaningless things, other nights they would talk about their future. He asked her if she considered having more children after the first one, to which she answered just one more. She asked him if he ever wanted children, to which he answered 2.

Every question they asked each other seemed to compliment each others answer. San wanted a small wedding in his home town, something that Y/N encouraged. Y/N wanted a honeymoon in Venice, wanting to visit the Rialto Bridge. San fully supported her, agreeing that it was a beautiful destination.

In whatever one of them desired, the other one would agree 100% or have the same in common. It's as if destiny desperately said they belonged together, and slowly they started to believe they did.

After her visit, she went back home to the little village far away. She continued to daily routine, going to work and occasionally going to her clinic appointments. From her 4th month leading towards her 8th month, she stayed in the village with Mrs. Park and Kyung Mi both of them doing their best to help their pregnant friend.

After her third trimester came, Y/N and Mrs. Park started to pack her hospital bag. Mrs. Park packing tons of baby clothing, pink and blue for when Y/N finally figured out the baby's gender. They keep the bag in Mrs. Park’s car for when they both traveled back to Seoul.

When she entered her 8th month, they packed Y/N’s suitcase and started their commute to her brother's apartment. That's where she spent her whole 8th month until she finally entered her 9th month.

That's where she was now, 9 months pregnant and standing in front of a little cafe. Entering the dimly light establishment, Y/N quickly scanned the place before she finally found who she was looking for.

Walking up to the older woman, her back towards her Y/N brings up her hands and covers her eyes. “ Guess who~~~~” she sings out, the older woman letting out a small laugh in return. “ I could be wrong but are you perhaps my annoying daughter?” she says, causing Y/N to gasp out in fake shock.

“ ANNOYING!? If anyone is annoying its Youngji!” Y/N yells out, crossing her arms and pouting like a little kid. “ You are right about that, Youngji does take after your father.” Her mother says as she gets up her seat and grabs Y/N by her shoulders.

“ Let me take a good look at you, I haven't seen you since you moved away darling.” She says, giving Y/N a once over before bringing her in for a hug. “ Oh how much I missed you, my princess.” She mumbles into Y/N’s shoulder, having shoved her whole face in the crook of her neck.

Returning the hug as much as she can with her big belly, they both relish in the comfort of their embrace. “ I missed you too mom.” Y/N says, getting emotional over not seeing her mother for such a long time. “ I missed you more.” her mother mumbles back.

Pulling away, her mother leads her towards the opposite seat from hers. They both sit together in silence just reading the menu and then placing their order to the waiter walking by. Her mother examines her, the sight of her only daughter about to have a child of her own causing her to get choked up. “ How have you been? How’s my grandchild treating you?” She asks, watching as Y/N rubs the bottom of her swollen stomach.

“ They've been super active recently, I guess it's because I'm already close to my due date. I've been good as well, other than the swollen boobs and not being able to see my feet anymore everything else is going well.” Y/N chuckles out, her mother snickering at her in return. “ Oh honey I know exactly how you feel. Youngji and you were so hyper during my last month, I swear I thought you guys would be great soccer players in the future with how hard you guys would kick me.” She laughs out, Y/N smiling at her mothers carefree behavior.

“ How's Youngji by the way? I called him the other day to see if he could join us today but he never answered back.” Her mother asks, playing around with the fork in front of her. “ Youngji has been really busy lately. The company he works at is growing fast and they are keeping him busy since he is the best worker there. He also asked me to tell you that he's sorry he couldn't answer, and that he loves you.” Y/N says, leaning forward and grasping one of her mother's hand.

“ Oh my poor baby, they are probably working him down to the bones. I hope he takes a break soon, his friends as well.” Her mother says, eyebrows furrowed in worry for her son and his friends. After their little conversation, their food gets to them causing them to eat in a comfortable silence.

Halfway through their meal, Y/N’s phone pings with a notification. Quickly picking it up, she checks her phone and starts to giggle to herself typing out a quick response then putting it down after. “ Who was that, darling?” Her mother questions, her curiosity peeked once she saw the big smile on her daughter's face.

“ It was San, he wanted to let me know that he'll be busy with his group's promotion today and that he'll call me later tonight.” Y/N carelessly says, missing the questioned eyes her mother gives her. “ Are you guys a thing?” She questions, causing Y/N to choke on her drink water snorting out of her nose from the question she was just asked.

Patting her chest, she shakes her head furiously while a bright red blush creeps up her face. “ OF COURSE NOT MOTHER!!! What makes you think that?!” Y/N exclaims, fanning and patting her face to get rid of the hot feeling covering her entire face. “ You got a glow in your eyes when you mentioned him. I know because your grandfather used to get the same look too when he talked about your grandmother.” She says, watching as her daughter avoids her stare by playing around with her food.

“ I don't know what you mean by that. I don't love him mother.” Y/N snaps back, feeling way to vulnerable for her liking. “ I never said you loved him. I just asked if you guys were together.” Her mother quickly defends herself, Y/N still refusing to meet her eyes. “ I- I won't date him mother... ever.” Y/N mumbles out, appetite completely gone by that point.

“ You won't date him? Or is it more like you can't date him ?” She questions again, receiving silence in return. “ Baby.. Are you scared that whatever happened with Hongjoong will happen with San?” Her mother asks, reaching forwards and taking her daughter's hands in hers.

Swallowing down a lump rising up her throat, Y/N clears it before finally speaking. “ It would be different this time if that happened. I'm scared to open up my heart like that again. What if he gets tired of me like how Hongjoong did? I'm about to have a child, what if he decides that he doesn't want my kid because it's hongjoong’s and leaves me for someone else. I can't go through that again mom, I can't put my child through something like.” Y/N says, watching as her mother rubs soothing circles on her hands.

“ Oh my poor baby, that will not happen with San. You want to know how I know that..? Because from that single smile and glow in your eyes I see that San makes you twice if not more times happier than Hongjoong ever did. Don't think that because that good for nothing ex wasn't able to keep his dick in his pants that San will do it as well. From what your brother has been telling me, San is trying his best to gain your attention. Knowing that you're pregnant, but still trying to gain your love I'll say that he's already better than Hongjoong will ever be.” Her mother rants on, voice hardening when she mentions Hongjoong’s name.

“ You really think so mom...That someone like him would even look at me that way..?” Y/N questions, voice small with insecurity. Her mother lifts up her head to look at her, giving her a heartwarming smile. “ I know so baby. You deserve so much more than Hongjoong and I can tell that San can give you that. You just need to open up your heart darling, you'll regret it if you don't. That child that your carrying might not be his, but he still stuck around to take care of you and my grandchild. To me that's a real man, and that's exactly what you my darling daughter need. An amazing man to love you and your baby unconditionally.” Her mother continues on, watching as her daughter breaks out in a small smile.

Y/N shakes her head, smile stretching out more as her mother comforts her. “ How do you know what to say every time I'm feeling down?” she chuckles out, bringing her mothers hand up to her lips and kissing them.

“ Oh darling it comes with being a mother! You'll know once that little bundle of pure joy is born.” she laughs out, tapping her pointer finger on her daughter's head.

They both continue to chat throughout their lunch date, laughing and reminiscing on old memories they had while still living together. Her mother talked to her about the time she spent taking care of her and her brother, giving her tips on how to take care of a new born as well.

Sooner than later, their little lunch date came to an end. They both stood right in front of the cafe, bidding their goodbyes’s as well as her mother giving Y/N’s stomach a kiss. Walking her mother up to her car, they both bid each other one final goodbye before her mother finally drives away.

Turning the opposite way, Y/N begins to make her way to her brothers apartment.

Halfway through her journey, she started to feel small sharp pains start up towards her lower back. Y/N stopped walking for a second, placing a shaky hand on her abdomen rubbing it slightly. “ You really are ready to come out huh?” She whispers to herself, standing there for a couple more seconds before finally continuing her way back home.

Standing in front of her brothers apartment building, she bids the front desk person a hello then makes her way towards the elevators. Getting in the small space, she begins to ascend towards the 6th floor continuing to rub her abdomen lightly as she still feels some discomfort creeping up.

Arriving to her floor, she walks out the elevator and quickly makes it into the apartment. Closing the door, she carefully leans against it as another sharp pain strikes against her back. Feeling short of breath, Y/N makes her way towards the sofa and drops her entire body on it. The pain last for a couple more seconds before finally going away, her back tingling from the previous pain.

“ It's probably because I'm so close to my due date already.” Y/N mumbles out, staying on the sofa as she caresses her stomach, feeling the rise of her flesh due to the baby kicking more and more.

Struggling to get up, she grabs her phone and checks for any missed calls or messages but is meet with nothing. Usually around that time her brother will call her to make sure she had eaten, and San will usually text her but she's meet with neither of those things. She figures that her brother must be backed up in the company and that San is currently busy with the rest of ateez.

Dropping her phone on the sofa, she makes her way towards the kitchen to grab something to eat. Before she can even make it there, she gets a sharp pain on her lower abdomen the pain so intense it causes her to double over. Huffing out, she walks up to the dining table and drags a chair out fumbling with it for a couple seconds then finally sitting down.

She stays there as the pain continues to increase quickly, coming and going a couple more times. There's no way I'm having this baby now! I still have two weeks before they get here! Y/N panics in her mind, wincing when the pain only seems to increase more and more.

Turning her head towards the clock hanging over the stove, she notices that her brother doesn't get out for another 4 hours. Debating whether she should call him, another pain (which she now begins to think are contractions) shots through her back and towards her stomach. Nodding to herself, she stands up with shaky legs and makes her way towards the living room where she left her phone.

Halfway through making her way to the living room, a sharp pain more stronger than the others causes her to cry out. Hunching over, she pants out multiple times before she eventually notices the small puddle under her feet. Staring at it in panic, she realizes the severity of the situation and as fast as she can makes her way towards the sofa and snatches her phone laying on it.

As fast as her fingers can type, she immediately dials her brother's number only to meet with the voicemail option. Cursing out she continues to dial her brother 4 more times before finally giving up and dialing San instead.

She prays that he'll answer right away, but is meet with the same results. She lets out a small sob from how scared she is, then takes a deep breath in order to calm down her racing heart and shaking hands. Redialling San’s number, she's once again meet with the monotone voice requesting her to leave a voicemail.

Finally breaking down, she sobs into her hand from how fast everything is happening and all without help from someone she knows and trust. Giving up on calling her brother and San, she turns to the only other person who she knows will help her without a second thought.

Trembling fingers hurriedly press a serious of numbers on the phone, bringing up to her ear when she's done typing in the phone number. The other line rings two times, before a shocked voice answers the call.

“ H-Hello..? Y/N is this you..?” the person questions, voice cracking when they call out her name.

Y/N can only cry out once another contraction hits her, body curling in with pain.

“ Y/N?!?? ARE YOU OKAY?!” they question, mind on high alert the second Y/N cried out.

“ H-Hongjoong.. Where's San.?” she hisses out through clenched teeth, trying to hold in the rest of her cries.

“ SAN? San’s with the rest of the guys in the practice room. The manager made them stay extra hours for slacking off and took their phones away.” Hongjoong explains, getting up from his work chair and making his way towards the door of the dorms.

Hearing that, Y/N sobs out again both from pain and knowing that she can't depend on him in that moment.

“ Y/N..? Hello? Please tell me your okay?! Did you just call me to ask from San..?” he questions, waiting for Y/N to answer back.

“ Hongjoong please listen to me. I need your help right now. Can you pick me up from my brother's apartment? You know where Youngji lives right?” Y/N fires questions left and right, not giving Hongjoong time to question her.

“ CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!? WHY ARE YOU SUDDENLY ASKING ME TO PICK YOU UP?!” He screams out, mind all over the places from everything Y/N is throwing at him.

The line stays silent for a couple of seconds and Hongjoong is about to apologize in case Y/N got mad at him for screaming at her. Before he can even open his mouth, Y/N screams back at him. The words she utters out causing Hongjoong to freeze in shock.

“ MY WATER JUST BROKE ASSHOLE! NOW CAN YOU PLEASE PICK ME UP CUZ I REALLY DON’T WANT TO GIVE BIRTH ON A DIRTY OLD CARPET!” she screams out, wincing after when a contraction hits.

“ W-what...?” Hongjoong whisper out, soul completely leaving his body.

“ The baby is.. Coming..?”