#i've said this before and I'll say it again but teddie especially really is a reflection of all the best and worst parts of yosuke

[daily-hanamura]

[thisonehere]

Hiya, i dont really have anything specific but can you write kitana or mileena x afab reader? (mostly kitana but i wouldnt mind mileena) anything fluff or smut plz

Mileena x F!reader

Headkanons

A/n: I love to! This was really fun for me to write. I actually made headcanons for Kitana so feel free to check that out too. Tags: Request, Fluff, Smut, NSFW C/w: Smut, Fingering, oral sex, face sitting, nipple play, mentions of bodily fluids

The thought of you makes the Empress feel elated. You stuck by her through thick and thin. You love her even though she struggles with Tarkat, and Mileena couldn't be more grateful for that.

As Empress of Outworld, Mileena has acted very stiffly and calculatedly. Not too empathetic, but too apathetic. She has to be a mix of mix and it is so difficult. She is happy when she can finally come down from the throne and join your side.

She enjoys it when you lead the conversation, especially when it's about...anything. Mileena just loves to hear you talk.

You two first met when Liu Kang brought you from Earthrealm. Mileena and Kitana were there to greet you at the portal as was the custom. But the moment Mileena laid eyes on you, she couldn't get you out of her head from that point on.

As you toured the palace, you could feel Mileena's eyes drift onto from time to time. Later at the great diner, Mileena would have to build enough courage to sit next to you. She'd ask you to tell her about yourself and she'd listen to you as if was the only thing that mattered in the world. If you tried to tell a joke she'd like it was the funniest thing. A very awkward and stiff laugh to be precise.

"You're a very lovely person, Y/n. If you don't mind...I would like to see you again... if that is okay with you." And just like that the two of you would be inseparable. Whenever you get together, Mileena brings you a gift. Not something normal, something strange, maybe an ancient/cursed artefact, a weapon fresh from the forges, etc. She also likes it when you bring gifts for her, no matter how simple they are. Flowers? They'll do. Chocolate? Sure, why not? The dismembered part of someone's body? Love it! She blushes and gets bashful whenever you give her hem, it is like she was never given a gift before.

Mileena feels safe whenever she is with you, she is free to let out her wild and mad side. She knows you won't judge her, that she can be herself. Though she has been dreading it, she will soon reveal her Tarkat affliction. She didn't want to tell you at first out of fear of you being repulsed by her and fleeing.

She has to come to the realization that she was putting your life in danger by not telling you. So the next time you meet Mileena, she will sit you down. "I just wanted to say...I...I think you're truly a wonder. You're kind and beautiful. You fight no other I've ever seen and I...I...I think your hair looks really nice. Did you just get it done?" she starts to ramble and starts talking about teddy bears for some reason. As you can guess, she's stalling.

"Mileena, what is this about?" You ask confused. Mileena lets out a sigh as she looks defeated. Looking you in the eye, she tells you everything. Her disease, what it is, how she got it, etc. She holds her breath as she waits for your response.

She is surprised when you hug her abruptly. "I'm so sorry to hear that. I promise I'll do whatever I can to help you." Mileena is taken aback by this. You were so accepting of her, more accepting than her mother ever was. A tear trickles down her face as she smiles. "Y/n...I love you....so much."

NSFW

"Ssshhh, be a good girl and relax for me," Mileena said as she had two of her fingers inside of your heat. The first time you were having sex. You were extremely anxious at first, Mileena herself was nervous too.

She did have Tarkat after all, she was worried you'd get infected with one wrong move. She was sure took a good amount of the vaccine before you came over to her personal chambers.

Sensing how anxious you are, Mileena gently kisses you to calm you down. "At ease, my beloved, I'm going to take care of you." She continued to kiss you, slowly made her way down to your clit and began to kiss it as well. You squeal in surprise as you feel the touch of her soft lips between your legs. The feeling was weird but it felt natural at the same time.

Soon she began to plunge her fingers inside of you. You try not to scream as you feel Mileena's fingers slide inside of you and tenderly rub against your vaginal walls. Mileena's free hand trails up your body and it finds its way to your breast.

She loves to watch you squirm and whine with one hand playing with your pussy and the other playing and tips with your nipple. You scream in surprise as you feel yourself orgasm. Your clit explodes all over Mileena's hand.

Retracting her hand, Mileena eagerly places the fingers into her mouth and happily sucks her finger clean of your fluids. She smiles as she licks her lips, "Tasty." She says as she gives you a smirk. she lowers herself down to your ear "I want you to sit on my face." She whispers.

Mileen is on her back, one hand on your hip to slowly guide you into a proper position and keep you steady. You scream as you feel her hot tongue joyfully lapping at your pussy like a dog. Her hand's hand guides her into the smooth and steady rhythm perfect to ride her face. You want to cry with how amazing this feels. After seconds of fighting it, you finally lose and scream at the top of your lungs.

Suddenly, Mileena's hand tightens around you causing you to halt in your face riding and she forces you further to face, closer than you then you thought was possible. A powerful feeling rushes throughout your body as you cum on Mileena's face. You fall off her and lay by her side as you try to catch your breathe. Mileena looks over to you, a wild passionate look in her eyes. " I hope you're not too tired yet. I still want to play." She says. This was n't the end, only the beginning.

[sinningtamer]

Not sure if you’ve answered this before but what are your favourite fics and ships?

Love all your art btw! <3 Thx for all the food!

i might've years ago, so let's go again! i'm gonna answer this question as only NSFW/kink related, otherwise the list would be way too long haha

alright let's start with the obvious: ParviII is and always will be my #1 one ship, even when I dip in and out of the fandom a lot (i feel the term OTP is super outdated these days? but if there was one ship i could use it with it's them...)

so obviously i'm gonna say Talking Body and Payment and Payback by @sparxwrites. because. you know. how can i not. oh yeah, Good Vibrations is also a classic. hiii sparx, i'm sorry for picking your older fics, i just have such a bias. they've written a ton of great stuff over the years though, so go give the account a peak! there's something for everyone, especially if you like darker stuff.

...speaking of accounts with a lot of content who lurk around here, shoutout to @pawpunkao3. lmpᴇarI is one of my favorite ships, and they're still such a rarepair somehow?? anyways I think about Between Bedrock and a Hard Place at least once a week tbh. A New Religion That'll Bring You To Your Knees is fantastic, and i have a soft spot for I Spy (even tho i didn't watch too much empires). again, another author with a whole arsenal under their belt, so don't just take my word for it and check the rest of his fics!

back to lmpᴇarI being a rarepair... @thatstoomuchsoup has Chicken Soup for the Soulbounds (okay it's more pearI-centric but they're both there) and is another blog that specializes in some of my kinks and these fandoms. same with @anon-teddy's content, gotta give a shoutout to full. this is also making me realize i haven't sought out enough poly S0up Group or GᴇmpuIse/PᴇarIgem fics...maybe i'll get back to you on that...

there's a bunch of good explicit trᴇᴇbark fics, but i said i was gonna keep this list concise, so the only one i'll specifically point to is how to deal with your supernatural lust for blood (and other things) in a completely normal and god-honoring fashion. for...reasons. also because it's good!

edit: oh my GOD i realized two seconds after posting this i completely forget to mention @also-an-art. go read (this is) hungry work and honey don't feed it right fucking now. i've read both of these in full (pun intended) multiple times they're that amazing. it's rare that the plot is just as good as the horniness, when i tell you i lost my mind at some of the development in these. also hot and dirty (like the la air) is a guilty pleasure. AND it introduced me to a song that ended up being #20 on my spotify wrapped LOL (RPF warning on that one! trust me tho)

let's get to my other bias, shall we? RᴛSpiff and RᴛS00t don't....have any explicit fics. nor does poly lᴀds. CMRᴛ does, though! I'm kinda picky about how people characterize them, but play it cool and Every Stumble and Each Misfire are lovely (note that the second one is also blatant RPF! don't say i didn't warn you o7)

speaking of lᴀds, if you follow me on main, you know i got into Bᴀnᴀna Bᴜs Sqᴜᴀd just last year (I'M SORRY, OKAY, DON'T @ ME-) you'd think getting into an old fandom late would mean a ton of great smut fics, right? to be honest, i haven't found many that i care for, but maybe i'm just picky... however, i remember your lips, they're the ones i miss, and smoke in your lungs, your lips on mine are SO GODDAMN GOOD i'm not even mad it's only those two i like because i could reread them 20 times. god. such fun characterization. shame the author orphaned them because i badly wanna read more of their stuff.

this is the part where you go, spirit, do you read anything besides (mᴄ)yt fandoms??? and i go, not really.............well, sort of. i like 0verwatch! and M0icy!! Reciprocity is a delightful PWP long fic. i'm also not really an omegaverse guy, but Water Me has such a good take on it i fell in looove.

okay, i'm gonna cut myself off here, enough though i could probably name dozens of more fics if i sat and thought about it. if anyone i tagged wants to be untagged, feel free to reply here or shoot me an ask/dm!!

[mistergandalf]

Essay time!!! yay! here's hoping ask boxes are long enough.....

OKAY!!! to start out i ADORE this chapter!!!! ADORE!!!! I love everyone's interactions and the flow and the flangst (fluffy angst)!!! Once again you have shown yourself an AMAZING writer!!

THIS PART!!! I adore how Thorins first instinct is to touch. just..hus words can be caustic a lot of the time but one thing I've noticed in your fics is that his hands are - for the most part - gentle. it's as if they can say what his words often can't? if that makes sense. And I can picture his touch being hust....so gentle. I L9VE THEM.

Dwalin!! I love that you had him mention that they are kin. I dont often see ot in fics, but they're cousins!!! and it should be utilized. I also like how dwalin is....not gruffer? but his motions while gentle don't have tje same feeling as Thorins though I know both of them adore the boys.

AGAIN WITH THE PHYSICAL TOUCH. I ADORE THEM. And just...Thorin being a good uncle! yes! go Thorin!

I know you were worried about Oins characterization, but I think you got him PERFEFT. matter-of-fact but also concerned and clipped? I love him!

"You have touched but a corner of it" - see? I like this. jo shame. just matter of fact. Dwalin isn't berating him for not knowing. Hes acknowledging that they sheltered the boys as much as they could. and I love that they did. ALSO "That which sustains the life of evil can wreak havoc on the life of Free Folk" is a LINE AND I LOVE IT.

GENTLE THORIN! SOFT THORIN! GIVING LOTS OF LOVE! GO HIM! ALSO YES FAMILIAL PLATONIC TOLKIEN-ESQUE KISSES. MORE!

GO OIN TELL HIM. Kili listen to your cousin!

COMFORT THORIN = BEST THORIN. just AGA SKOANAGAYABAKSKDUSGBW I LOVE HIM SO MUCH YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

okay. yelling done. and this isn't so much an "essay" as me yelling at you. sorry! here's hoping this sends! I can't wait for the next chapter and you're amazing and I'm so happy you're writing again!

I LOVEEEEE YOU EVERY FANFIC AUTHOR DREAMS OF MESSAGES LIKE THIS. I shall respond to all points in order mwahahaha.

lmao I love the word "flangst." I guess that's really what h/c is when you boil it down, huh?

CRYING ABOUT THIS ANALYSIS OF HOW I WRITE THORIN. Like okay really the issue here is that physical touch is my love language so I've GOTTA write this way I guess. But also I love love love the idea that he can say with his hands what he can't with his words?? I guess I do that a lot. I write him pretty gruff a lot of the time, and reticent with what he says, but definitely not reticent with reaching out physically! I don't know what that says about anything but I do love it lmao.

And I think Dwalin is a huuuuge softie. Graham McTavish has my heart because he can slay me with a single expression... like have you ever seen Outlander? He destroys in his role in that show and even though I honestly hated his character a lot, his performance still brought me to tears. He did the same especially in the throne room scene in BoFA and uuughhh he's just soft inside and I don't care how he tries to come off, he's a teddy bear and I'll make sure anyone KNOWS IT.

AND YES. I honestly really really loved writing Oin in this chapter. I know we talked about it before, but I really did keep thinking about how he only starts getting heated when he thinks he's going to lose Kili in DoS, and tried to translate that here. Like he's quick, clipped, and down to business, and he's not going to let people get in his way in order to save a life. He's a good Dwarf and I feel like a lot of other fanfic authors don't make use of him like I do?? He's basically the family doctor in my fics and I don't care if no one else does that because I'll do it forever lmao.

AND: Thank you for pointing out that line Dwalin said, because him saying that and Kili's response was literally the very first thing I wrote of this entire fic and I was so so so excited to finally get to put it in!!! The Free Folk line I came up with while writing but ugh I was really excited about using that one specifically. You know how a writer loves to hear that a darling line really stood out to the readers, too!

YES GENTLE KISSES. SORRY EVERYONE ELSE BUT I'M ITALIAN AND I LOVE PHYSICAL TOUCH. And also this is exactly how I am with my own nephew so I'm just writing from experience here. Family kisses ftw RIP to all the touch starved cultures out there but I'm different.

I'm SO glad you love Oin's yelling! I really enjoyed doing that in this chapter. Kili is SO STUBBORN jsdfhsdg

I was veryyyy excited to write this chapter because honestly the entire POINT of the chapter was to write comforting Thorin. Not gonna lie. That was THE goal.

And the next chapter is gonna be from Fili's POV again... and you KNOW how proud I am of that first part I wrote already but the tumblr babes reading this don't get to know yet ;) I'll keep the suspense!!

THANK YOU LOVELY FOR THIS ASK I ADORE YOU

[impala1967dwinchester]

Sam Winchester: Running Away

Pairing: Sam W. x Reader

Pov: Reader/Sam

Warnings: Panic, anxiety, being scared, mature content, talk of sex, Sam, inner thoughts

Summary: With Y/n and Sam only being together for a short time, when Y/n learns she pregnant she freaks thinking every bad thought about the things that could go wrong.

Word Count: 2.1k

A/N: This is Dominant Sam I'm talking about here, but also a protective Sam. This is for band--pyschos 1.5 followers bingo writing challenge.

Square: First Child

Sam Winchester Master list

Main Master List

TagList: @sweetdetectivequeen @wonderfulworldofwinchester @band--psycho

So, maybe I've been with Sam for a few months, but it's not that big of a deal. We're just a once in a blue sorta thing. Sam and I yes live together alongside his brother Dean, but I don't mean that Sam and I share a bed you know.

Okay well, maybe we do share a room. We share a comfy large bed when a hunt goes bad, or Sam wants to release some tension. We go and let go of our bodies' tension. Together we let everything go, and we sort of become one.

Sam is a giant teddy bear, but when he's had enough put onto his shoulders he needs someone to ground him, that someone for right now just so happens to be me. Bad hunts turn into long, fast, and hard nights.

Nights when Sam drags on, his large hands wrapped my throat pinning me down to the fluffy bed. My nails leaving red marks down his muscled back. His hips snapping against my cervix, his lips leaving bruises on my skin.

The way he'd snap his hips into me as I rode into him. In moments like these Sam was my cowboy, and I was his baby girl. The loud grunts and moans that echoed off the motel, or bunker walls were the most amazing sound to my ears.

The sound of our skin slapping together, and the dominant nature of Sam, his almost animalistic way of fucking me. I wasn't a virgin when I met Sam and Dean, I wasn't a virgin when Sam first came to me with this idea of friends with benefits.

But even without being a virgin, taking Sam for the first time. That made me feel like I had died and came back to life. I know saying that seems probably very odd, but Sam there is something about him that makes him so fucking... fuckable.

The moment that I came down from my high and he laid on top of me, trying his hardest to not lay all his weight on me, I reveled in those moments. Was this what it was like to fall in love with someone?

Would Sam really want that? Would I be enough for Sam?

Months it went on like this, bad hunts or just wanting to let go. It went back and forth. The deal that we held, was for the both of us, and usually, we needed each other at the same time.

Bumping into each other, cute moments. Moments when I would try to put more effort into it. I learned real quick that Sam had a thing for lace and the color red. Something about the way it felt against his hands, or how it looks against my skin tone.

Nothing's more special than having your boy toy pull off your lace panties with his teeth while he makes direct contact. Again there was that dominating nature of Sam. Sometimes my mind would float to what it would be like with Dean, but I would be very much slapped out of that thinking when Sam would snap his hips into me and ask me 'who do you belong to?' or 'Who owns your body?'.

This of course in my world would only last for so long. Something always had to go wrong. So wrong that everything that I had worked for wasn't worth it. Wasn't worth it, if I would just be crashed in the end. I didn't think any wrong could come from fucking my best friend in a way.

Because that was Sam and I are.. were. We are friends, best friends, who know everything about each other, who know when the other is about to have a break or the other needs space. What happens when Sam finds out about this.

This is a normal fuck up that be taken care of. This is my fuck up, this fuck up is huge. He won't want to stay. No, see I've ruined this for the both of us.

What happens if Sam. What if? That's the big question stop overreacting. You've spent time with Dean, ask your question then act, not the other way around. You need to actually find out if your pregnant.

'pregnant' "FUCK" I said out loud rather loud, louder than I should have said it. "Y/n you okay?" I outside the bathroom door. Panicking I slipped the pregnancy test into my sweater pocket. "Yep, I'm super," I said and unlocked the door, slipped by Sam. Smiling before I casually walked away from him. Panicking on the inside.

"what am I going to do?" I asked myself under my breath. "A Winchester baby, a baby, my baby," I said hushed under my breathe. A tap to my shoulder pulled me from my very important inner monologue.

"Y/n, what's wrong with you?" Sam said wrapping his hand around my shoulder. Mouth left gaped open. "Y/n?" Sam repeated, just my name this time made everything worse. The echo of Sam's voice grunting and moaning my name as he comes down from his high.

"Sam," I said looking up at him. These were moments that I said he was a huge teddy bear. Worry crossed his handsome face. "Y/n what's wrong?" Again he forced his first question.

"Nothing Sam. Just let it go." I said tapping his hand on my shoulder. There was a look of upset confusion on Sam's face. "Y/n don't you dare pull away from me, especially after what we have together," Sam said as I walked away. I stopped and thought about it. 'Don't pull him into it, you just take care of it.' I just kept walking.

I made sure that the pregnancy test was really correct, by going to a doctor's office. "You're about six weeks along." The doctor said. More panic. More anxiety, more questions, more thoughts. That drive back to the bunker I was fighting the idea of leaving.

If I just left, what if I just didn't come back. 'No go back and try to hide it, say you're sick, hide in your room. You won't be able to hide it for long' Sam will question you, Sam will notice, he'll notice your body change, he'll notice everything Y/n.

When I got back Sam was waiting for me in the library. "Where were you Y/n?" he asked me as I passed by him "I was out," I said passing quickly. Trying to stay away from him, the closer I am to Sam the harder it is to not tell him the truth. The grip of his hands around my wrist is so powerful, so strong.

"Stop running away. I just need you Y/n I thought..." Sam paused looking down at my body and then to my wrist. "Sam let go of my wrist. You're hurting me." I said ripping my arm from his grasp. Stomping away and down the louder echoing bunker hallway.

'LEAVE' 'No stop he's right you made a promise, a deal.' "Stop" Fighting with myself was the worst of all of this. You can't run away from yourself. No knock at my door, but I wouldn't have known. I had taken a nap my thoughts clouding my mind. Waking up to a quiet bunker and a note stuck to the coffee machine. "Y/n whatever is going on.

That's what I'm here for. Please baby girl. I don't know what to do. Shoot me a message, or even text Dean. Just let me know you're okay." Signed Sam. Yet another wave of new thought, new emotions. I want to stay, but it wouldn't be good for either of us. Nobody benefits from this.

A normal hunts take Dean and Sam about a week tops so with the letter that Sam left behind I can only imagine that Sam is pushing Dean to hunt a lot faster. Get the hunt over and done with come home and figure out what is wrong with me.

I say I've got two days tops before the boys get back. To toggle with the idea of leaving. Two days doesn't seem like enough time, but I need to not trap them in a situation like this. Sam doesn't need to have another thing on his shoulders, Dean doesn't need the worry or the panic. Of a Winchester baby.

Taking a long walk around the bunker brought memories alive in my mind's eye. The great, the good, and the bad. Most of them included Sam. The night he asked me to start this friend with benefits or the wild night that he took me on the book-filled library table. He fucked me in the middle of the wide open.

Would it be bad to say that I fell in love with him from that moment? He made me feel like the only girl in the world. A few spots in the kitchen early morning breakfast being made, and in the garage washing whatever car Dean would let us wash.

'You need to go' Memories pinging in my head. Hitting all the corners of my head. This is the most stressful thing I've ever had to do. There's a baby inside of me now, every choice has to be for this little one. This choice was for Sam and for this little one.

My hand laid on my still flat stomach. I wish that I could feel Sam's hand on top of mine, or watch his face. But that wouldn't be a good idea and I know that.

"They're going to a Winchester in and out," I said walking past Sam and Dean's rooms. I think I'll just have to write a letter to Sam, a sort of backwards odd way of responding to his letter.

This letter will just be my goodbye. "Hey Sam, by the time you read this I'll be long gone. Let me explain. I'm pregnant, with of course your child. We never got the chance to talk about being parents, never got the chance to even have a normal relationship. Sam, I fell hard for you, so hard that I don't want to hurt you. I know you most likely aren't ready to be a dad, so yes I know I'm taking that choice away from you. I am making so many mistakes and I don't want to be a burden on your shoulders or even a burden on Deans. They'll find out about you, they'll be nosy like you, be hardheaded like you, defy me like you defied your father." I wrote out pausing to let my shaking hand take a break.

"Cowboy, I'm running away, because Sam that's the only thing I know how to do. Don't you dare think... Don't you dare ever for a second think that I don't love you, or that this baby won't grow up knowing who is, who knows maybe I'll come back... I love you, Sam, I love you cowboy."

I read over it once and then twice, Dean stood over my shoulder. His hand lying still against my blade. I swiped the pad of my thumb over my Y/n nicely small handwriting. "Sammy?" Dean questioned. "Hmm?" I hummed fearing my voice would give too much away. "What did she write?" He asked, "Y/n wrote that she's pregnant, and she is running away afraid to put the burden of my child on my shoulders and on yours." I said continuing to look at the page in front of me.

"Dean we.." "I've got you, Sammy. We'll find her bring her home and you wife her up." Dean said, grabbing my bag and racing back to the impala. "She's on foot, and most likely hasn't made it very far, I'll call Charlie, you call her," Dean said, whipping out my phone it tumbled in my hands landing on the footwell of the front seat.

Pulling it out it came with pictures, pictures of the three of us. Sitting on baby's hood, her in the middle of the two of us next to her. I could see it now, a baby Winchester, sitting on her lap and taking that picture all over again.

"Sam, Charlie says that she's gonna try her, see if we can sort of trick her into going with Charlie until we can get to her and bring her home," Dean said.

"Yeah let's hope she wants to come home," I said the mix of different emotions and feelings shoring through me, I felt the revive of the impala's engine. 'There's no running away from the Winchesters.'

Completed on: 05/04/2021

[be-the-spark-flyboy]

Meant To Be [part 1]

A/n: missed last week buT NOT THIS TIME WRITERS BLOCK😤 written for @autumnleaves1991-blog writer wednesday

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Finn (modern au)

Warnings: swearing, pining, BB8 is a snarky 4 yr old, cuteness, some thirty thots, I don’t know how toddlers speak forgive me, barely proofread, age gap (Finn is 25 and Poe is 34)

Word count: 1.4K

—-

Poe was so tired. He could feel the sweat rolling down the back of his neck, the sun beating down on him mercilessly as he slammed the trunk of his car close a tad harder than necessary. A tiny head peaked out from the passenger seat at the noise. Poe grimaced.

He was really looking forward to handing over Beebee to Han and Leia for the evening and get some much needed rest. But now he was practically stranded in the middle of a desert, sand as far as his eyes could see and a flat tire, puncture kit nowhere to be found.

Dragging his feet back to the front, he dropped heavily onto the driver's seat, huffing in frustration. The radio was playing a pop song he may have heard sometime in passing, but hey, at least the air conditioning was unaffected and they had more than enough snacks packed for the trip. The last thing he needed was a hangry kid crying from the punishing heat.

Said toddler turned to look at him and he snorted at her serious expression and his aviators looking comically large on her small face. Beebee smiled back. "Now are you going to call grampa Han?" she asked.

"Looks like I don't have a choice," he sighed, prompting a round of giggles from Bee.

"He's going to be mad,"

"Little lady, do you think it's funny when your dad gets yelled at by that old man?"

"I'm gonna tell him you called him old man," she giggled again.

"No you won't,"

"Yes, I will," she told him with conviction.

"Snitches get stitches," Poe lurched forward tickling her sides making her squeal with laughter.

"I'm gonna tell him!"

---

"You always get the same thing! Try something new," Rey groaned.

Finn smiled pleasantly at her irritation, cheerfully replying, "Nope," as Rey parked her ancient looking pick-up truck outside the ice-cream parlour. "And if you get me anything but butterscotch I'll steal your keys," he threatened.

"And then what? Walk home by yourself?" Rey laughed, slipping out before Finn could issue more stupid threats. He pouted in his seat, watching his roommate happily skip into the shop.

Fridays were Finn's favourite. Classes end early and it was his off day too. More often then not Han lets Rey off earlier at the shop so he gets to spend more time with her as well. It was just perfect.

The phone on the dashboard starts to vibrate not a minute later. Finn recognized the caller ID and picked it up. "Hello, Solo,"

"Rey not there?" came the gruff reply.

"Nice to hear from you too, I've been good, how about you?" He asked cheerfully. Maybe the fact that he wasn’t face to face with Han Solo made him a little more bold than usual. Rey swears he is a teddy bear under all that grumpy personality but Finn was yet to be convinced.

"Not in the mood, big deal," the old man huffed on other side.

"I can take a message," Finn folded. Best not to push him too far.

“My idiot godson got himself stranded out in the desert without a puncture kit. I need Rey to go help him out,”

“Aye aye, captain,”

---

Bee was adorably dancing along to the Peppa pig theme song on her god-knows-how-many episode on the iPad propped up against her knees. Exhaustion was pulling at Poe’s eyelids as he fought to keep them open.

It had been almost an hour since he made that absolutely not fun at all call to Han, who spent fifteen whole minutes lecturing him on the importance of being prepared, especially with a toddler dependent on him. Thankfully Leia had interrupted with an excuse of wanting to talk to Beebee.

Then they had waited and waited. He had already gotten out of the car to stretch his legs about three times, not more than a few minutes at a time, too scared he would melt right into the ground from the heat. One particularly long blink of his eyes later, he noticed a battered looking pickup truck approaching and thought dear lord let them be my savior.

The truck parked on the opposite side of the road and a young woman in a tank top and grease stained jeans hopped out. Must be the one Han called Rey. Poe dropped a kiss on Bee’s forehead, asking to her to stay inside. He pushed the door open and— very nearly tumbled to the ground in his gay panic.

Another person stepped out of the truck, a man maybe a few inches taller than the woman. And goddamn, he was fine. The black band tee stretched just so around his chest and Christ, those biceps.

“You must be Han’s godson,” Rey’s voice snapped him out of his gawking. God, he must have been so obvious. For all he knew, the guy could’ve been Rey’s boyfriend.

Poe slapped on a polite smile before offering his hand. “Poe Dameron. Nice to meet you,”

“I’m Beatrice Dameron, but everyone calls me Beebee,” said a voice in an adorable toddler drawl. When the hell did she get out of the car? Was he really that distracted? “Nice to meet you,” Bee offered her hand mirroring him.

Rey crouched down to take her hand. “That’s a nice name. I’m Rey,”

“I asked you to stay in the car,” Poe hissed after Rey went to get the spare tire.

“I didn’t say yes,” Beebee answered before skipping away after Rey. Are four year olds even supposed to be that sassy? An amused chuckle drew his attention back to the handsome stranger.

“Cute kid,” his smile rivaled sunshine— shut up, inner-monologue.

“You’d think that, but before you know it she would have you wrapped around her little finger and you can’t say no to her,” The handsome stranger laughed again and something fluttered in Poe’s chest at the sound.

“I’m Finn, Rey’s roommate,” Oh goodie, not boyfriend then. “You new to town?” Finn asked. God, even his name was perfect.

“Technically, yeah. But it’s fortunate I got transferred somewhere with people I know, ya know,”

“What do you do?”

“Flight instructor at the airbase,” Poe shrugged nonchalantly. It was a brag, he knew it and judging by the arch of Finn’s eyebrows, he thought it was impressive too. “What about you?”

Before he could hear Finn’s answer, Beebee came barreling into Poe, screaming, “I’m gonna be a mechanic when I grown up!”

“That’s great, honey,” Poe lifted up his kid into his arms. Rey walked up behind her.

“You’re all set,” Poe looked at her on surprise. That was fast. After thanking the her for the help, Rey and Finn departed. He sighed forlornly. If only he still had game or time to date.

“You ready to leave now?” Bee nodded her head vigorously. There’s only so much desert one can tolerate.

—-

Han failed to mention his idiot godson was hot. Quite honestly, ‘hot’ wasn’t even doing justice to the head full of dark, gravity-defying curls either. Finn groaned out loud, tipping his head back into the head rest.

“He’s a pilot, Rey,” Rey straight up laughed at his pathetic whining. But Finn paid her no mind as usual. “Do you think he has those uniforms Air Force officers wear? I bet he looks so sexy in them,”

“I don’t know, you could just ask him,” Rey stated.

“Hell no! He has a kid, what if he’s straight? Or worse, what if he’s married?”

“Don’t say you didn’t see him checking you out! Besides, he wasn’t wearing a ring,” Finn briefly wondered when Rey got so observant.

“He wasn’t checking me out!” Finn spluttered.

“Oh ho ho, yes he was,” Rey exclaimed. “Very nearly drooled, too,”

“It doesn’t matter,” he deflated, crossing his arms over his chest. “I’m probably not gonna see him again after this anyways,” he lamented.

“He’s Han and Leia’s godson, of course you’re gonna see him again,” as if on queue, Rey’s phone dinged again. “See who texted?” Finn skimmed through the message Han sent and groaned again. “What?”

“Han invited us to dinner, apparently Poe’s gonna be there too,” Finn swore Rey’s answering cackle could be heard for miles.

—-

[addictofsupernatural]

Emotions (pt. 2)

Billy Hargove x reader

Summary: Billy and y/n have a fun and intimate day together.

Word Count: 1872

Chapter 1 • Chapter 3 • Series Masterlist

When you got in the car Hopper didn't take off. Instead he watched Billy wave to the two of you before he walked to his car and took off. "Who was that?" He asked. You couldn't see his expression behind his sunglasses.

"A friend." You said perkily.

"A friend, huh? Like, like a close friend?" His tone confused you, and though you couldn't tell, he was both worried and irritated.

You looked out the window happily. "I don't know yet. We just became friends today." You then looked at Hopper, eyes filled with excitement. "He's gonna take me somewhere tomorrow!"

"Yeah?" He was failing miserably trying to sound enthusiastic about this. "Where?"

"I don't know." You couldn't stop the smile on your face even if you tried. "It's a surprise!"

"Yeah, okay, we need to have a little chat when we get home." You asked what for, but he danced around the question. When you did get home, he led you to the couch where he plopped himself down. "So, uh, we need to have a little talk about... certain things."

"What kind of things?" You asked. "Guys and girls things?"

He huffed in aggravation. "Yes. Guys and girls things. See, sometimes there are certain guys that girls have to stay away from–"

You shook your head. "No no no, it's okay Hopper, really. Billy's not like that, I can feel it. He treats me good."

"Um, sometimes people treat other people nicely because they want something from them."

You stood up, going from behind his chair and hugging him, sending calming emotions through him. "Hopper, there's nothing to worry about. If he ends up being bad I'll calm him down with my abilities. Mkay?"

He huffed. "Fine." He slumped into his chair. "Could you stop using that on me? Now I don't want to get up." You giggled.

"Where are we going?" You asked as the school day ended. He led you to his car with his hands on your shoulders.

"That, sweetheart, is a surprise."

As Billy drove down the road, Queen blasting and you looking happily out the window, he thought about the girl right next to him. You. You were getting inside Billy's head. He couldn't stop thinking about you last night. About the way you listened to him when he talked about himself and actually cared about what he had to say. About the way you gave him such high appraisal. About how you continued to be nice to people even when they were all jackasses. About your smile and your giggle. Damn, was he whipped?

Once the car stopped you stepped outside, looking at a huge mall. "Billy, what is this?"

He stepped out of his car. "It's a mall outside of town. You need some better clothes, ones that you pick out. This place has clothes."

You bashfully shook your head. "Um, Hopper only gave me ten dollars and–"

"Y/n, look at me." You stopped talking and looked at Billy. "I'll pay for it, okay? You don't have to worry about anything."

You bit your lip, but still smiled brightly. You grabbed his hand and held it, which he was surprised of. He didn't really hold hands with anyone, especially not girls he takes interest in. But you were different. He felt calm holding your warm hand. He looked from your entwined fingers to your smiling face. Yeah, this was okay. "You really are a good person Billy. Let's go!"

Billy told you that you could go into any store you wanted. You didn't know what you should be looking for, so he took you to a clothing store. He then told you to pick out whatever you like. You tried on some clothes inside the dressing room, then came out in high waisted jeans and a small tight shirt that covered just below your belly button. "What do you think about this? I like it, but maybe it's not good on me."

You looked absolutely fucking hot in Billy's eyes. The outfit hugged your curves perfectly. Your hair complimented your face as it dropped off your shoulders. He went over to you and turned you around to face the full body mirror, with him behind you and his hands on your hips. "You look gorgeous, doll."

You both spent the day at the mall, you excitedly going through stores and him watching contently as he caused this happiness. Afterwards he took you to a diner, which you apparently never been to one before. "You mean this diner, right?"

"No, I mean any diner." You said as you looked around. You then looked at him. "Thank you for bringing me here Billy."

He reached across the table for your hand, grabbing it as he felt your warmth again. "It's no problem sweetheart." He then noticed something on your arm. 005. "You have a tattoo?"

You gasped and yanked your hand away. You then looked down at your lap. He heard you mumble an apology. "Um, this was given to me by the people who had me and my sister El before Hopper began to take care of us. They numbered us all. I've had this for as long as I can remember."

Billy stared at your sad eyes that refused to look up. What kind of life were you living? How were you so nice when all this crap happened to you? He got out from his side of the booth and slid next to you. "Sweetheart, I'm sorry."

"People like to make fun of Hopper because he's sluggish and a little over weight, but he's a good person. He treats me and El like we're his children and he does the best he can. Why do people laugh at us? What's so funny about my family?"

You felt a pain inside of you as a lump grew in your throat. You figured you probably scared him off, dumping your baggage onto him. Maybe this was your problem. You were just too different. Maybe you should–

An arm snaked around your waist and Billy pulled you closer to his side, where you fit perfectly. "Absolutely nothing, sweetheart. People just don't see things the way you do. They aren't as smart as you."

You finally looked up at Billy. You never really paid any attention to looks. It had nothing to do with the kind of person someone is. But looking into Billy's eyes, you found him very attractive. "You're very pretty." You blurted out. "I just wanted to let you know."

Billy chuckled. "What do you find pretty about me doll?"

"Your face. It's beautiful. Your hair. It looks soft. Your body. I don't think I've ever seen someone look as physically strong as you. Mainly your eyes. They're very calming."

You both leaned in closer to each other, though you didn't really know what would happen next, when the waitress cleared her throat, looking annoyed. She then smiled at Billy. She took your order and soon enough brought you your plates. Although she put Billy's plate of food on the other side of the table, he slid it over to your side and stayed next to you.

Once the waitress brought the check, she put her hand on Billy's arm, squeezing it and giving a wink as she left. The bill had her number written on. "Um, maybe I could call Hopper to come pick me up if you want to stay with that waitress."

"Now why would I want to do that when I got you right here?" You smiled and watched as he took out a cigarette, lighting it as he turned to face you again. He looked in your eyes, a small smile on his lips. "Besides, we're not done yet."

You two then went for a walk together, talking about anything and everything. He told you about his plans to go back to California once he has enough money. You told him that you wished to see the world; anywhere outside of Hawkins. You both then made a deal that if the two of you were to remain friends, then you would go together. You were so happy that you accidentally radiated off some happiness, making Billy feel all warm and tingly inside.

As he drove you home you answered the questions you could about your background. You mainly told him about your sister Eleven. He asked you why your house was in the middle of a forest, and you responded by saying that Hopper was just worried for you and El. You were very vague with your answers but Billy didn't push at it, considering you were brave enough to even share some information with someone, especially him. Once he stopped the car he got out the bags from the trunk and knocked on the door. Hopper answered the door with a happy face until he saw Billy.

"He's just gonna set down the stuff and then head back to the car." You said with a smile. Hopper silently opened the door while watching Billy's every move. Billy mumbled an excuse me sir and put the stuff he bought you down. "I'm gonna walk him out and say bye now." And with that the two of you were gone again. "I had a really nice time." You happily said.

"So did I sweetheart." He had his hands in his pockets and flashed you a charming smile.

You threw your arms around his neck and hugged him. Billy again felt a surge of warmth course through his body, only this time it was not from your powers. "Thank you for this day. There's something in the backseat for you." He pulled away a bit and looked down at you, cocking his head curiously. "It was a well spent 7 dollars." Your face radiated with happiness and excitement.

You then gave him one more quick hug and went inside. Billy walked to the car, slightly excited as well, and slid into the drivers seat. He looked back at what was sitting in the back seat, and couldn't help but crack a smile. It was a teddy bear with a leather jacket on and a cigarette in hand. He grabbed the bear and inspected it. There was a folded paper in the jacket pocket. He took it out and unfolded it, revealing a phone number. He chuckled and drove home.

He decided to call the number as he got home. Everyone was asleep, including Neil, so it wouldn't be a problem. Lucky for him, you were sitting by your phone in your room hoping he would call. Once it rang, you picked up with a smile. "You called." He heard your sweet tone.

"Happy to hear from me doll?" You could practically hear his smile.

"Of course! Did you like my gift?"

Billy stared at the teddy bear on his bed. "Yeah, he's cute. Almost as cute as you."

You suppressed your giggle. "His name is Damien, but I was gonna name him Billy if I decided to bring him home with me."

There was a pause on the other end, until Billy asked, "So, what are we gonna do next?"

---

Tag List:

@roxytheimmortal @shane-isa-shame @actuallyazriel @tanovic54321 @chipster-21

[binkysteebnpewter]

Of Paper Planes & Teddy Bears

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem Reader

Words: 2100+

Summary: Wanda has loved you since you trained her when she joined the avengers. However she’s too afraid to confess all because she’s sure you’re dating the Diner guy.

I used a divider a few times, they’re by: @writeyourmindaway 💗

Warnings: TW:Dissociation, TW: Anxiety Implications, explicit (?) detailing, conspiracy thoughts (just to add flavor 🤷🏻‍♀️).

Taglist: @softpeachbarnes @thejournalman

There was so much that I could say about her. So much good, so much praise, so many compliments that'd sound like Shakespeare had possessed my body to write an entire play solely about how her eyes stared into my soul with just a simple fleeting glance she'd give as we passed each other in the hall. There was so much I could say about her to show someone how much I love her and what I love about her, but that would take too long— even though I knew I could talk about her until my lungs failed to take in air and my heart failed to beat.

What I would utter out was that her attitude was what got me up in the morning, other than the fact she always made breakfast for everyone even though she didn't have to— and her cooking is absolutely blissful if I'm honest. However her coffee is downright dreadful. She liked her coffee way too strong for me or anyone other than Tony and Bruce, who refused to drink theirs any other way now. I didn't see how she could drink it, especially not black with just ONE spoon of honey.

There were those days where sometimes she didn't want to cook and everyone would sometimes go to the nearby diner, and today was one of those days. She had dressed down pretty casual and comfy, but oh— she looked otherworldly in her comfort clothes, dressed to no ones expectations as she held her favorite teddy bear

Sam drove while everyone else talked, but her? She sat playing with a few small paper airplanes, making them fly with psychokinesis. Making one fly out of her course, she stops them all and looks to me. She smiles and one of them unfolds suddenly, refolding quickly. Smiling at the blossom flower, my eyes widen when I moved over and rested in my lap. She smiles to me once more and focuses on her airplanes again, leaving me a storm of emotions.

The time passes like it's racing as we all ordered, waited, receivers, and ate. Some of us were still eating, some were just talking and relaxing. It was peaceful and the diner was never busy enough to draw a crowd to us, thankfully.

"How you gonna be like 'she gotta blonde, she gotta be thick, she gotta be tan'?" She asks, standing up to a guy sitting near us as he dissed his own girlfriend.

"You ain't got the right to be picky. All you packing is a tic-tac.. what you gonna do breath mint?" She asks and he flusters.

"What you gon' do Listerine?" She asks, giving him a look full of utter sass and confidence.

Smiling as the guy flustered and began ignoring her, I nodded and gave her a thumbs up as she turned back around. She smiles to me and laughs a bit.

"Yo! You're here today!" I hear and she turns.

"Mattie! What's up?" She smiles, standing and giving the guy a hug.

Him.

The one I wish I was. The guy who gets to call her baby girl, the guy who gets to stay up and talk on the phone with her for hours, the guy who gets to hear her sleepy voice say those three words I so desperately want to hear and say back.

I love you.

Wanda had left my origami flower in the diner, right on the table with her plate. Did she not like it? Was it the wrong color? I purposefully kept my airplanes folded neatly in the colors black and red, the colors I knew she liked. Was I overthinking all the subtle things? Was I imagining them? It was possible, maybe I'm reading too far into things.

I walked silently across the street from the cemetery, a hat placed on my head and tipped low as I faced the ground. My fingers played with the fidget in my hand, the puzzle fidget I had solved too many times to count now. I was long overdue for a new one, there was no combination of moves someone could do to mess up the colors on my rainbow ball fidget toy to make sure I couldn't return each colored ball to its respective hole too quickly. Wind whipped around me and chilled my skin, my thin jacket doing nothing to keep me warm.

The pigeons, I swear, are staring at me as I walk. Following me, I know it, as I took turns and they stayed right nearby with me from the start of my journey. I was a long way from the compound, that I knew for sure. I'm convinced one day they'll begin recognizing individuals, or that maybe they're not even real— robots maybe. Do we ever see them sleep? Do the power lines charge them when they rest upon them? Do they video people and record conversations? Is this how the government truly finds wanted people?

A bus loops around and around, passing through the old streets. The neighborhoods of old tenement houses, public schools, coffee shops, and candy stores. Sidewalks lined with cart shops, their goods ranging from street food to newspapers and tourist spots. I haven't seen the bus stop once as it's passed by one time after another, yet there are always less and less people aboard it with each pass. Has it even stopped? Why come down this road so many times? Is it forever stuck in this route? Is it in limbo— wait, can objects be stuck in limbo?

dO UnITs hAVe a SoUL??

I pass a hot dog stand, the grilled hot dogs looked oddly like fingers to my eyes and I suppress a gag. Do they bleed when you bite into them? Is the juice metallic tasting? Is the texture— Let's stop there, yeah let's stop there.

I head to subway station to realize I had been in the Brooklyn-Queens area, my numb fingers aching as I swiped my subway card. I stand as far from people as I could, the suffocating feeling of the subway closing in. The scent of the train car was musty and pungent, like old sneakers in a gym locker and rotten food found in the home of a hoarder who'd dropped their food and never found it to pick up and throw away. My fingers pause in the motion of scrambling my fidget as I realize the conductor was making an announcement, I caught on too late. Asking the man nearby if he'd heard the announcement, I shuddered when he gave me a simple rat-like smile and said nothing with a shrug.

I guess I'll never know.

I feel as though someone is watching me and Natasha's words play through my head. 'If you feel like someone's watching you, it's because someone is.' Do I look for them? Do I make eye contact and sass them? No, don't. Really don't, never trust a man or even a women on the train this late at night— I have no clue why they're up, or why I'm up even. I had woke with a feeling of dread and left without a single thought about it, the compound had felt too stuffy and small— despite its size.

The compound was... a mystery to me. It was large and spacious yet at times it felt like it closed in on me, suffocating like a 5x5 room. It made me feel like SCP 096 in his airtight steel cube room, watched yet not seen.

I step off the train at a random stop, heading out back into the chilly night air to continue an aimless walk through a concrete jungle shaped like a maze of looming buildings that wait— wait for the perfect moment to swallow me whole like a fly in the air, gone like I had never even buzzed in someone's ear.

Walking off the sidewalk and into a parking lot, I glance around. The parking lot may seem empty but I don't trust it, there are cars here— I know there are. They just don't want me to see them yet. They like to hide, spook me when I'm not paying attention once more. The building seems to expend as I enter with my membership card in hand, I'm sure I'll never understand how everything fits inside this place— just like I'll never understand where all the shoppers in here come from, even so late.

Are they even people?

I don't know how long I've been in here before I begin to become hungry, taking notice of the samples being handed out. Don't trust it, never trust it— you don't know if that person is sick or has done something to the food. Buy something and make it yourself, or buy a packaged snack— some fruit even. I cannot find check out, and the lady I had passed only gave me an eerie smile when I asked how to get to check out.

What is up with people and not knowing the answers to questions tonight?

I sit motionless, vaguely aware i was on the floor in the kitchen. I was also vaguely aware it was some time past 4am, when I returned from my late name wander. However something is wrong, something is staring. I do not know what nor do I think I want to know, yeah... I don’t want to know— I never will want to know.

It feels as if I’m staring at the back of my own head, watching as blurs vibrate and buzz off me and disappear into the air. I was staring, but staring where? At what? What color is it? What shape does it take? Is it smooth or textured? Is it decorative or a utensil?

I want to reach and touch myself, reassure myself that I am, in fact, here— that I am tangible and existing. So I reach up to touch my forehead, but everything blues— freezes. It was like something had stopped me from proving I was tangible, but I didn’t know what stopped me. I can’t figure it out, I’m sure at this point I don’t want to figure it out.

Do not touch my own face, that is asking for trouble. Something has warned me not to do it, and blindly I will take the unseen things advice.

My mind feels cloudy? No, it feels foggy. Not quite... It feels as if someone has steamed it, the moisture leaking out my eyes— I am crying with a dull expression as I sit on the kitchen floor, barely aware I even exist. This skin isn’t even my own, who’s is it? Did I steal it? Did I win it? Did we swap? How do I give it back? It is uncomfortable and suffocating, irritating like a sunburn.

Who am I? Am I a spectator? Am I a player? Am I winning? What am I playing? What am I spectating? Are others here? Is this a competition? Where are the controls?

I’d like to take the controls now.

It was a very faint and ghostly feeling of a hand touching mine that made me obscurely aware my hand had never dropped from moving to touch my own face. How long ago was that? The world was a blur, scratchy and set in black and white like a very old VHS tape. I didn’t know how long it was of those ghostly hands rubbing my upper arms and occasionally wiping my face and eyes, but the feeling of those motions became more prominent— heavier and more tangible.

Eventually, my world came into color and the first thing I could see was red. Brown hair that was lazily held in a messy ponytail, skin adorned with a pair of red pajamas, green eyes that seemed so soft and worried as they met mine.

“You’re with me, miere?” She asks softly and I touch her hand that was cupping my cheek.

She is real.

She’s here, tangible, existing.

So I am real, tangling, existing— because she is talking to ME.

“Miere?”

“Please don’t leave me alone...”

“I am not going to leave, Miere. I am right here, don’t worry.. I am always right here.”

“I love you..”

“Miere?”

Meeting her green eyes, they seemed so bright but so cautious. Why? Squeezing her hand that had been holding mine, the corners of my lips tugged up a bit.

“I love you Wanda..”

“I... I love you too, Miere. I, I thought you were dating... Mattie?”

“Mattie..?” I mumble, confused.

Who is Mattie? Do I know a Mattie? Surely I do, she wouldn’t have mentioned a Mattie if I didn’t and— Oh, the diner Mattie.

“No, I’m not dating Mattie.. He was my friend from school.” I admit, his face now fresh in my head.

“Besides, I don’t like guys.”

“Are you... are you gay?”

“Of course I’m gay.”

[stardust-static]

Puppy update 🥰

So if you didn't know I got to bring this guy home early which was about two and a half weeks ago now. We weren't supposed to get him till 8 weeks which was the 16th of December, but we got a call when he was six weeks saying that he's eating solid food and no longer needs his mama. Bailey and I did research and found that puppies usually still need a mama dog to learn mannerisms from and usually they're still nursing at that age. However since he was eating solids and I have three mature age dogs to teach him, & I'm an experienced dog owner who will pretty much be home with him all the time. I thought that it should be fine. Also he was sleeping outside in a pen.. these dogs are typically farm dogs and sleep outside with the farm animals to protect them at night. I was worried he might get too used to that and not want to sleep in the house.. some people get GP'S that are a little older and they usually won't sleep indoors as they want to patrol at night. We want our guy to be inside at night. These are typically working dogs that want a job, but mostly we wanted him to be a pet and his "job" is to protect my other dogs incase of coyotes and us incase of intruders. So it wasnt such a bad deal to get him when he was still so young and impressionable. We agree to come get him. Took a spur of the moment two hour drive. Got out to the farm in the middle of no where. He handed me the other boy. I knew he wasn't mine because I had been staring at this picture of my puppy for weeks. I set it as my wallpaper.

As you can see my guy had speckled nose (its fading now :( ) so he brings me my baby who was just sleeping and he's holding him up to me by his neck fat and he's crying and I grabbed him and he nuzzled his little face into my neck and that was it. We got in the car and I held him close to me and he shook and shivered half of the way and I just kept comforting him. He flinched everytime I touched him clearly not having much human contact. Half the way home he started warming up to me and was giving me kisses and wagging his tail. Bailey and I fell in love with him. We could not handle how adorable he was. Then we finally made it home. I set him in the garage and he was still so goofy and unsure of me. Then he came to me and let me pet him and love on him. Then one by one I let the other dogs in to meet him. They didn't really think much of him at first. Next we gave him a bath which he clearly never had. He smelled like urine and there was so much dirt in his fur. He was a little angel in the bath. The next day he became more confident and started to play with all his new toys and the eskies were pretty jealous. I've made sure to give them all equal amounts of love so no one feels neglected. Wally as always is a lot of work in that department. He's got his behavior problems which have heightened since the puppys arrival. We're working on that. Fast forward to today and Winston adores him. They play so cute together and Winston will actually let the baby cuddle him. Wally just.. I don't think he knows what a baby is. He's very rough and quick to anger. Bailey and I always say that he would have made a great only dog, but he's definitely not so all we can do is correct his behavior when he's mean to the puppy. The puppy cares very little about Wally's hissy fits though. I just don't want him to learn any bad behaviors from Wally. He hasn't yet. He's honestly just a big goofy teddy bear. Such a happy little guy. He's already doubled in size. Everyday I look at him and notice him getting bigger. Today I noticed that he's getting his long coat hairs coming through. He no longer fits in our kitchen sink that we washed him in the first night. Since we did get him so young he is very attached to me. I can not leave him alone. I've been sleeping on the couch with him when Bailey has to work in the morning and he's a sweetie. He snuggles up to my face and gives me kisses to wake me up when he has to potty. He's perfect. The only difficult thing is potty training. The worst part of raising a puppy for me. Especially now that we have carpet in every room. Luckily my mom gave us her commercial carpet cleaner. I put that baby to use last night. It's coming along though... Anytime now I'll have him potty trained. I had my mom babysit him today while I worked and she said he was an angel and didn't potty in her house once so thats good! I just watch him like a hawk and try to catch him before he goes. I'm always letting him outside and hopefully he'll learn how to use the dog door soon. We just got that set up for him, though we will need a bigger one eventually.

Now let me tell you about the stressful ass day I had yesterday and about how I just wanted to lock myself in my room and cry at the end of it all-- because of my pets.

First we wake up and I let the dogs out, and discover that Wally is leaving our yard. The gate on the back side of our property is a metal bar gate with chicken wire over it. Wally pushed the chicken wire out of the way and slipped his skinny little weasel body through the bars. So we went to buy a heavier duty wire fencing to put over the metal fence. Bailey said we should bring Toby cause we want to socialize him and also get him used to the car. So we bring him and on the way home Bailey says we should put him in the trunk of my suv so he could be more comfortable and because he was scratching Bailey up on the way to home depot with his little puppy claws. So we put him back there and we're on our way to get food and Toby is in the back screaming his head off. Then we go "whats that smell?" And I look in my rear view mirror and I see our puppy Toby with his feet hanging over the backseat, paws covered in shit and he's just jumping on everything back there that he can, just really smearing it everywhere. So I'm like WE NEED TO GO HOME NOW!!! just trying so hard not to puke. Bailey is laughing his ass off. Then Toby jumps over and into the back seat. I don't know with what strength suddenly. Winston and Wally have never managed to get out of the trunk space. So now he's making his way to me and I have to reach back and just hold him in place. Theres shit all over my back seat now. I'm crying. I keep gagging. Then Bailey starts to get queezy. We're both not keeping it together. So we eventually get home. Bailey cleans the car and I clean the puppy. Then I have to clean Winston because he ate my mascara while we were gone and got it all over himself. Then as I'm letting the dogs out my indoor cat bolts out of the house for the third time this week. I didn't even go after her. I just said "so be it!". I was having such an annoying day. Then Bailey goes to get us food and I put puppy in the kitchen because I need to vacuum and shampoo the carpets. Puppy screams his head off the entire time cause he hates being confined. The cat comes home an hour later. Bailey and I eat and get to work repairing the fence. Then puppy pees later on the newly shampood carpet. Then Bailey and I get dinner and put puppy in the kitchen again. We're just there at the dinner table eating our Chili's takeout, Bailey goes to get something out of the kitchen and I just hear him go "oh...no." I just looked at him and go "did the puppy shit in there?" and he goes "yup" I say "is it everywhere?" And he says "yuup..."

There was no peace to be had that day.

The dogs woke up and chose chaos.

So today Bailey went to work and so did I.

It was the first time since getting the fence put up that I let the dogs have free roam without me being there for hours. I've been really afraid to. It my number one fear right now, them getting out or stolen or somehow attacked by another animal, but I left the dog door open and just let them be for the day and took the puppy to my parents house. We're also letting the cat come and go as she wants now, because she has been so determined to leave the house. She's constantly bolting out the door and would even rather be in the garage most days. So we're letting her be and hopefully nothing happens to her. I took the bell off her collar so she can be extra stealthy. She did go into my neighbors yard and their 5 dogs chased her away and after that she's just been hanging out on our property laying in the dirt, soaking up the sun. Theres a little dog door built into the garage door that I'm now keeping open for her.

But yeah.. like I said my parents said that Toby is an angel and they'll watch him any time and I came home to the yard still intact and my dogs perfectly fine after being alone for six hours.

I enjoyed my much needed mini break from them and I'm going to go out tomorrow as well now that I feel confident that they'll be okay if I leave them sometimes.

I guess I'll end this massive post about my animals now.

✌💖

[punkscowardschampions]

James & Ava

James: [so obviously all through this party whenever we can we're saying thanks/love you/sorry etc at relevant points via little touches but there hasn't been much time with all the kid chaos & we gotta use our words now] James: Thank you Ava: Don't mention it, I had a good time Ava: think the girls did too 😌 James: because of you James: which is why I had to mention it Ava: It's okay, making cupcakes and crafts was bound to be more fun than my history essay Ava: easy choice, really Ava: how are you now? apart from exhausted James: still astonished that Teddy helped to clear up, even though your cousin did most of it Ava: it's amazing what a boy will do to keep a girl happy, right James: whatever you're hinting at, I'll do it Ava: 😱 do you think I'm that sort of girl?! 😂 James: I don't think I'm exhausted enough to fall into the trap of such a clearly trick question Ava: Then maybe you didn't party/clean hard enough 🤔 James: I'll happily send you evidence of me scrubbing the bath until it's less blue if you like James: but somehow I doubt that is what you're contemplating Ava: An interesting proposition Ava: but who decided baths had to be white anyway Ava: I say keep it James: hopefully whoever rents this place after we've gone will agree with you Ava: I'll bring 'round the spare bicarb, that'll work James: there'll be some in the cupboard, from all the baking recipes Jay's school sends insisting she needs it Ava: I guess I'll have to think of another excuse to come see you soon then James: wanting to is enough Ava: I'd have to be a fool to not want that James: though after today, less so James: I'm very sorry about my family Ava: They aren't your fault James: nevertheless James: & speaking of excuses, my sister told me she's pregnant again as one for her behaviour before I could properly challenge her for it Ava: Oh that's a shame, I could have implied she was just fat by asking Ava: but no, really Ava: I can handle it, it's not as if my family are particularly supportive about us either James: you'll have other chances before her official announcement, I'm sure Ava: not my style Ava: it'll be nice, for the girls to have more cousins their age James: but to hear her speak, there's already a very distinct possibility that this child has surpassed every single one of their age appropriate milestones whilst in utero Ava: 🙄 Ava: if anything that just means more pain on the way out, no Ava: not that underdone is the preference but you know James: she'll have scheduled the caesarean the moment there was evidence of a pink line Ava: guess she's confident in her ab-building post-baby workout then James: confidence has never been lacking as far as she's concerned Ava: I can tell Ava: like your dad, like you said James: yes Ava: I'm sorry Ava: that they tried to...whatever they were attempting to do, or if it was even intentional behaviour Ava: but I think the party still went well where it mattered James: there isn't a single thing for you to apologise for James: it did go well Ava: I'm not trying to add more tension or friction to proceedings when it already comes so naturally James: you didn't, in fact, by being there you managed to diffuse it James: I would have been a lot more stressed had you not been Ava: Good Ava: and she didn't show up Ava: so what more could we ask for James: my parents & sister following suit perhaps James: but that won't be much to ask once we move further than a stone's throw out of their shadow Ava: leaving the postcode for less than Monaco? Ava: unlikely Ava: I keep looking at places Ava: everything goes so fast, it's crazy, by the time I go to send the link, it's gone James: I've secured a viewing after work for the day after tomorrow, if you're free you're more than welcome to come James: [sends her a link] Ava: Wow, that's so exciting Ava: are you excited James: I'm cautiously optimistic Ava: That's such a you way to put it 😊 James: oh is it? Ava: Yes Ava: I like it James: I like that you're unabashed in your excitement Ava: You deserve exciting things to be happening Ava: there's nothing better than a new place for a fresh start James: if it were that simple, I'd agree with you that nothing could be better Ava: No, I know Ava: new floors and four walls doesn't fix everything Ava: but it is something you CAN do Ava: along with all the things you already are, and continue to do James: I want you to be right, but I can't help but feel that it's just a new location to hide in, because of all the things I can't change Ava: You aren't the one that ran away Ava: and no one can say that Ava: but you're better, even without the comparison to her which leaves you looking practically saint-like James: only because there is no amount of distance I can put between your brother & I which would alter the facts or the future as it is shaping up to be Ava: he's being so Ava: stubborn and stupid James: all day my thoughts kept circling back to the idea that this time next year everything could be different James: she might not be here James: I don't know what to do Ava: That won't happen Ava: we won't let it James: you wanting it to be a promise you can make or me wanting what you're saying to be true might not be enough James: I know how stubborn he is Ava: that doesn't mean that he can make a judge agree with him Ava: neither does the fact he's training to do as much Ava: you've raised her, you're her dad James: that alone doesn't mean I can guarantee anything either James: while raising her I've made a lot of mistakes Ava: no Ava: not nowhere near enough or the type that warrants anyone taking her away James: you didn't know me before rehab Ava: neither did my brother Ava: who's he going to call as a character witness, Chloe? James: he did, but I'll admit that the past is less of a pressing concern right now compared to the struggle of the present James: & the ease of getting wasted Ava: Hardly Ava: what kind of friend was he by that point Ava: he didn't tell you that Chloe had told him he was the father before you, did he? Ava: he has no room to judge, on any level Ava: he still does worse James: regardless, I can't blame him for judging me James: because I don't think there's worse than the things I consider doing whenever there's the briefest moment such as this, when they're asleep James: recovery is constant & truly exhausting Ava: Maybe you can't, but I can Ava: exactly Ava: it shows strength of character Ava: I'm just saying, if he takes it there, which, I'd hope not but no, I can't even pretend to promise that right now Ava: he can't be throwing around those sort of accusations like he's got nothing that would look worse under scrutiny James: it's a weakness of character James: & I don't want my flaws to extend to driving any kind of wedge between you & your brother James: or to have to expose any of his, irrespective of what they are James: being free of her finally means I no longer have to play any of those games Ava: admitting and dealing with it isn't Ava: I know Ava: it's horrible to think about, especially when it is so soon after she left, and how that has barely registered Ava: but if you have to, you'll do whatever you need to, right Ava: I mean, as long as it doesn't hurt her, then you have to James: I don't want to do anything that hurts you either Ava: It's not about me though James: he's your brother Ava: That doesn't mean I'm going to endorse his bad choices Ava: not for an easy life Ava: and not at the expense of yours, or Jay's, of course James: they aren't choices any of us should have to make Ava: no, we shouldn't Ava: but he has to be on board with that too Ava: he can't rush and force what he thinks he wants, without any regard for the rest Ava: just because the whole situation was fucked from the start James: he wants to meet her, I keep saying no Ava: Have you told her anything yet? Ava: Not saying 'yet' like you need to or there's a timescale here, you know what I'm trying to ask James: if there were a right time, it wouldn't be now James: she's coping well with her mother's absence but she's nevertheless having to cope James: I'm not going to give her something else to contend with until circumstances change, whether that's because of your brother or a more positive development Ava: Totally Ava: it's a lot already Ava: he should be thinking the same way James: he seems to, when we speak about it James: I can't blame him for wanting to get to know her though James: clearly that's my dad bias but anyone who doesn't is missing out Ava: she's a good kid James: you're good with her & for her James: I can't remember the last time she was as happy as she's been over the last few days Ava: that makes me happy too James: oh good, because I haven't yet asked how you are James: I'm sorry Ava: don't be James: it's important James: my family believes I see you as an unpaid problem solver & I have no desire to prove them right to any degree Ava: you know that I know that that's not how it is though Ava: I understand, you've got way too much going on in your head right now to be too concerned with the pleasantries Ava: I can do without James: just because you can doesn't mean you should James: this matters to me, you, us James: we're not an us if it's just me using you as a sounding board Ava: You don't Ava: and I know it matters because you wouldn't trust me with any of this if it didn't Ava: you've been there for me whenever I've needed you too, my problems are just smaller scale, on the whole Ava: doesn't make it one-sided James: okay James: as long as you know Ava: I promise Ava: I wouldn't hate some alone time with you soon though James: how soon can you do? Ava: I have to go to Dublin this weekend Ava: but Thursday I don't have any afternoon lessons, so if you could do something then? James: I'll pick you up James: if necessary I'll do extra work when you're in Dublin Ava: you're so lovely James: no, I missed you the second you left, that's all Ava: I missed you too Ava: not being able to talk properly Ava: I hate that about parties James: me too James: but you were a vision in your party outfit Ava: you think so? Ava: you can be a monster again any time you like 😋 James: yes, I very much think so James: you looked beautiful Ava: you'll make me blush James: I hope so, despite not being there to see it Ava: in terms of photographic evidence, definitely more fun than the clean bath James: unless I were in it, alas I'm not sure I'd fit Ava: Oh babe that's so sad Ava: the world doesn't cater to people your size, how rude 🥺 James: I'll try if you promise to drop whatever you're doing & help free me should the unthinkable occur James: & thankfully hotels do, so I won't have to see that face on Thursday Ava: Of course Ava: we have to protect your modesty and decency at all costs 🤭 Ava: hotel, you say? James: yes, that way we'll both fit James: without any kind of farce or firefighters getting involved Ava: I did say alone time Ava: no 🚓 🚑 🚒 allowed James: not in this chapter, I promise James: it's not that kind of book Ava: It doesn't have to be tasteful Ava: I don't think the readers will mind James: I'll bear that in mind Ava: Please do James: while I've got things under consideration, would you like to stay over? James: I can arrange taking you to school on Friday morning Ava: Um, yes Ava: of course James: okay, I'll ask Diana to watch the girls James: after today it's the least she can do Ava: Is she usually better when I'm not there? James: no James: she'll happily find a grievance with whoever is Ava: well, at least it isn't personal Ava: don't know if that's worse, actually James: plenty were tailored to you personally if that makes you feel any better Ava: it's understandable, I suppose Ava: if I was who they thought I was James: my ex wife was everything they thought she was & it did nothing to help me Ava: yeah James: I have my opinions on my sister's husband & I keep them to myself Ava: he wasn't there, was he? James: there's a slim chance you'll be able to meet him at her baby shower, but he wasn't at the last one Ava: I'm sure the chances I'll be invited are even slimmer Ava: sounds delightful though James: oh she'll invite you, if only to show you how a party should be thrown Ava: 😏 Ava: it's a good thing I already know baby shower etiquette then Ava: been to enough James: you'll have to teach me what it is Ava: Very modern of her to want any men there Ava: usually they object on the fact of it being 'women's business' and it's like a hen party with no alcohol James: Matilda's & Jay's were both like that Ava: Yeah, I can see that James: there was obviously champagne though James: I assumed that was why I wasn't invited Ava: Oh yeah, the other guests can get hammered Ava: and the mum has to lowkey cry about it the whole time, but all the gifts and attention you get should really make up for it Ava: they're weird, honestly, another excuse for all of the above James: the horrific flashbacks of said crying & attention have returned to me, thank you for that Ava: 😬 Ava: you can have a baby shower now if you would like Ava: I'll look up all the ridiculous games Ava: you earnt it James: you're the one who has earned anything you'd like James: there wouldn't have even been a party today if not for all the work you put in Ava: all I like is being with you Ava: it was worth it James: you know I don't want you to leave, it upsets me that you're not here now Ava: Same Ava: I wish I could be James: did you finish your homework? Ava: not quite, my parents wanted to talk to me for ages Ava: which really goes against their concerns being my schoolwork but there we go James: well, I'm very concerned about your schoolwork & ensuring you don't have to go to Kings after all, so if there's anything I can do to help Ava: I'll tell them Ava: that will no doubt but their mind at ease Ava: it's not even that hard, I'm just lacking motivation James: of course James: I went there too, none of the work was ever that hard Ava: they'd like you to believe the oxbridge admissions day others but Ava: we know the truth James: I'd like to know what would motivate you Ava: Well Ava: maybe we could do lunch or something before Thursday Ava: that is forever away James: it certainly does feel like it Ava: or we can walk Frank or I'll come 'round for dinner Ava: just say I can see you before then and I'll get it done James: we can do every single one of those things once you have Ava: 😍 Ava: Okay, I'll do it Ava: as you're so inspirational James: as we've discussed, I don't want things to be one sided James: & you're the most encouraging person I've ever met James: I've never found someone to be this stimulating before, it's a remarkably unfair contest for my capabilities James: thus I'm motivated to keep motivating you Ava: I love being with you so much James Ava: I can't wait for your life to be exactly what you want it Ava: it is going to happen, I'm so sure of it James: before you I didn't even know how my life could hypothetically be bearable, never mind thinking about how I may have wanted it in its ideal James: you build character, Ava James: I love you so much, but also I can stand who I am now, with you Ava: you're doing all the work though Ava: to totally restart, that's amazing you know Ava: and I love you too James: because you prompted it Ava: as long as you're taking your credit too, I can deal with that James: I need you to know that I couldn't do this without you, back then or now James: & how much I appreciate you is in line with that Ava: Good thing you've got me Ava: and good thing that's what we both want Ava: everything else we can work out together James: it's the most perfect thing James: hence I'm still working out how to do any of it justice with a novel Ava: Words are your speciality Ava: even if it takes a lifetime, that's time we have James: & if nothing else it puts your current writer's block into perspective James: you definitely won't be forced to do homework forever Ava: 😅 very true James: because of course my struggle is consistently greater than yours, darling James: there's a long line of people waiting to tell us, lest we forget Ava: but of course Ava: only have to worry about when my next assignment is due and how to wear my hair, thank god 💁 James: thank god Jay didn't insist you turn yours blue as well James: getting you sent home for violating the dress code wouldn't endear your parents to me Ava: I don't think I'd look anywhere as near as cool Ava: talk about a real party faux pas James: as far as she's concerned you're incapable of committing one, or any wrong at all Ava: no pressure 😅 Ava: she's so cute Ava: and funny James: she wants to get her hair cut next, as long as you say you like it when I eventually take her, you'll continue to be her favourite person Ava: Ooh, that's a big one Ava: how is dad feeling about it? James: hypothetically less hair to fight to get a brush through sounds like a fantastic idea James: but actually, I don't know Ava: she'll love it Ava: you will too Ava: though it'll be a total shock James: I'll be the sentimental fool, frantically trying to catch a lock to keep before it hits the floor, undoubtedly Ava: 🥺 You're adorable Ava: at least Mattie has a way to before her first haircut, a reprieve for you James: it'll make her happy, that's what I should focus on, I know Ava: you're still allowed to feel a type of way about it Ava: that's what dads are for James: mine isn't the demonstrative type, unless disappointment is what he wishes to convey, but yes James: I don't look to him for parenting advice Ava: You're already better Ava: and that can be a comfort now, instead of how he is being detrimental to you James: thank you James: all I ask is that you don't also decide to change how you wear your hair in the near future please, there are only so many changes I can endure regardless of whether they're positive or negative Ava: Okay, I can promise that Ava: just for you James: well in that case, just for you, I'll ignore the weather forecast & walk Frank tomorrow Ava: 😁 Ava: I wish you could come to Dublin too Ava: we'll be having bonfire night James: one day, I can promise that Ava: I know, it's too soon Ava: I'll buy sparklers, when I get back James: I look forward to it Ava: I won't bring back a jacket potato even though they're so much better off the fire James: true, I remember it being one of the main merits of scouts Ava: you were a scout? 😊 James: yes James: I did my D of E as well Ava: That tracks Ava: you're always prepared James: I don't know about that Ava: Are you suggesting that the D of E was in fact a massive waste of time? 🤔😱 James: I'm not suggesting anything until they approach me with whatever package they deem appropriate in order to secure a glowing endorsement James: King's have certainly benefited from having me on side, in spite of losing you to more worthy rivals Ava: Smart 😏 Ava: You did almost convince me, and in a way, you still did, just not to their benefit James: I can't in good conscience take credit for the persuasive charm of The Vault James: or pretend as though I wasn't the one being utterly convinced by you Ava: Of course, those dizzying highs are unparalleled and cannot be replicated anywhere else Ava: and just as obvious is my conniving seduction of you, as pointed out with pointed looks and silences James: it is a relief to hear that high school wasn't in fact my peak, I'll make sure to really emphasise my superiority in the book's acknowledgements Ava: If you thought it was possible to peak in that school, I'd have no interest in gold-digging you, would I James: nobody is professing that you're good at it, darling James: you'd have been more likely to target my father's bad marriage if so Ava: I'm so sad for myself Ava: tragically bad at it, really James: unfortunately we can't both be figures of pity & I've already been typecast in said role Ava: I'll have to get better at it and be more worthy of scorn James: regardless, there's very little chance they'll improve enough to be worthy of where they've put themselves James: though the mock trial is a kind consideration given that your brother is vying to put me before a real one, I suppose Ava: Thank God they don't know James: my father has already baulked at the idea of us moving, if I have to go to him cap in hand to pay for lawyers James: I dread to think Ava: I still hope they never need to be told Ava: maybe that's foolish at this point but James: if it is, it's a folie à deux James: but once I tell Jay I can hardly swear her to secrecy James: & she does need to be told, my delusion isn't that far reaching Ava: No, true Ava: kids are bad with secrets Ava: and obviously, not the kind of thing to encourage anyway Ava: they won't treat her differently at least, right? Ava: as long as they can keep their talking about it out of her earshot too, I feel that's the best we can hope for James: I'd love to say no, of course they wouldn't Ava: I didn't want to be the one to suggest it Ava: even if slagging off your family might seem like the appropriate course of action right now, not that bitch either James: there's very little you could suggest that my imagination hasn't beaten you to Ava: I know darling Ava: I'm sorry James: I try to console myself with the knowledge that there's a degree of inevitability anyway, look how differently I am treated, without any question of being his flesh & blood James: my family have & always will have their favourites, set in & as immovable as stone Ava: and she does have Chloe's parents, who clearly adore both girls Ava: I only have one set of grandparents Ava: you're right, they're going to act however they choose to act, and they can blame it on what they like but as long as Jay knows it isn't her fault and she is loved by lots of people, then that should be enough, and I'm sure it will be Ava: you've found happiness despite them James: & she will too, I'll make sure of that James: do your parents know? Ava: Yes Ava: he told them at the time, as well Ava: so they were less shocked but obviously still James: I definitely won't be welcome at the bonfire then Ava: It's not your fault Ava: they can't blame you James: it wasn't the first time I'd heard it said that I wasn't her dad either, I could've done something when it was Ava: She's the only one that knew the actual truth Ava: the only one that could say or do anything for definite James: I didn't want to know, that's my fault Ava: Neither did my brother James: we're as bad as each other Ava: It's more complicated than that James: it won't be to Jay Ava: I don't think Jay is going to understand it like that James: what I mean is, all of this should & could've been sorted out a lot sooner Ava: Maybe Ava: but none of you can go back James: no, we can't Ava: All either of you can do is go from here Ava: God knows what Chloe's next move will be James: as yet she isn't making any James: there wasn't even a card Ava: It's insane Ava: it's like she's dead Ava: playing dead, anyway James: that would be preferable James: at least I'd know what to say to Jay if she were Ava: It's so unfair Ava: that she thinks she gets to do this Ava: that she owes them nothing James: she does get to, neither I nor her parents can stop her Ava: If her parents know where she is though Ava: they could take the kids to her Ava: but then, I suppose all that would result in would be trauma for them Ava: for fuck's sake James: precisely, I can't blame them for being terrified of the scene they'd stumble into Ava: the parent that stays always get shit on Ava: it's not right, this is her mess and she's doing nothing to fix it James: I'll gladly fix it for their sakes, that is what's right James: they've been through enough with her Ava: and you'll do a better job than she ever could Ava: it's just frustrating Ava: but I know you know that more than me, and do not need telling remotely just Ava: I feel angry on all your behalves right now James: you don't know what it means to me, how much you care, even if it is distressing & distracting for you right now Ava: I know you want the best for me Ava: but in the grand scheme of things, me fluffing one essay is not actually the big deal any of my family would like to make it so we don't have to have a bigger conversation Ava: this is important, you are James: an assignment isn't the issue, it's that everyone believes you're consistently putting my importance above yours James: & maybe if it's that glaring to all but me they have a point & I am asking too much of you James: leaning on you too hard through this Ava: No, they don't want to see it, because this whole thing, us, makes them uncomfortable Ava: it'd be my business if I did anyway, every person in a relationship I know does that Ava: but it isn't at the cost of me and my importance anyway James: okay Ava: I promise, James James: I'm doing my best Ava: You're doing amazing James: it doesn't feel that way Ava: no Ava: but the girls are gonna grow up happy, and then it'll be worth it James: are they? Ava: Yes James: I want to believe that Ava: You'll get to see Ava: that doubt, of whether you're fucking it all up, is just part and parcel isn't it Ava: but things will get easier too, day to day like James: whether I fuck it all up again you mean, because I actually have for so long Ava: but you're fixing it Ava: that's what really counts James: but it doesn't erase my past mistakes, they count as well James: every slight against Chloé is also one against me because I stood by & let them happen James: I knew where she was, where she could plausibly still be James: & here I am, continuing to do nothing Ava: at the end of the day though Ava: all anyone really wants from their parents is love Ava: knowing that you love and care about and for them, put in that work, that's what counts Ava: she isn't good for them right now, clearly Ava: maybe she does get to just walk away, regardless of it being unfair James: you're right, clearly James: I'm sorry, it's been a really long day Ava: It really has Ava: what are you doing to wind down? James: I don't know James: what do you suggest? Ava: Depends Ava: you could try to fit in your blue bath Ava: cook yourself your favourite food Ava: we could watch a movie or some really mindless trash TV James: Beautiful Creatures or Beastly are supposedly a must for Twilight fans James: if you've seen those, there's also The Mortal Instruments but I'm not sure how many of those books got made into films James: it feels unwise to risk getting invested in a neverending cliffhanger Ava: I think they made that one into a bad TV series too, after the films bombed Ava: could be an exercise in how not to do it Ava: as well as relaxing James: really? James: well that's settled Ava: I bet it has such a sub-par soundtrack too James: compared to what we're used to, what wouldn't be? Ava: Precisely Ava: after the day we've had, can't be dealing with that level of excitement James: enough that I don't immediately fall asleep after pressing play will be fine Ava: I'll fill you in on the travesties if you do James: no, after the day we've had, I want to spend time with you Ava: I love you James: I love you too

[imagineseclipse]

TWNG 4- Introductions are overrated.

<<<Part 3 Part 5>>>

So it turns out you did in fact survive your first couple of days at Beacon Hills high, though you would never admit it to your father. Deep down you knew that you wouldn’t have made it past the first day if it wasn’t for Phoebe and the Stilinski siblings.

No one really payed much attention to you and it seemed that had you worried all for nothing. You were now successfully on your third day, Seb and Ally had tried their hardest to make you feel welcome and if you ever needed anything you knew that they were now on the list of people that you could go to. However that didn’t shift the uneasy feeling in your stomach every time you walked through the entrance doors.

You had become friends with the Stilinski’s within hours of you first meeting and now on a cold thursday morning the four of you were sat huddled together on the bleachers watching as Lacrosse practice was being cancelled due to the weather.

You sat with a Stilinski sibling on either side of you, Phoebe sat one level below the three of you, her legs resting on the bench.

“So, you’re a banshee like your mom?”you turned to Ally, who nervously tugged at her leather jacket.

“A pathetic excuse for one anyway”she mumbled to herself.

Phoebe reached over, squeezing Ally’s knee supportively. You furrowed your eyebrows questioning Ally’s sudden mood change.

“A bit of a sore subject for her”Phoebe answers your mental questions.

“I mean, how am I supposed to be a banshee if I don’t scream?! If someone’s dying nearby I mean, I definitely can’t tell”she exclaimed angrily brushing her hair out of her face as the autumn wind started to pick up pace.

“My mom got her powers so early on and I’m just, maybe I’m just not functioning maybe there’s something wrong with me, I haven’t had one premonition, not even a tiny little hint that something is going to happen”she continued to rant.

“Maybe that’s because nothing is actually happening Ally I mean, nothing like that has really happened in the whole 18 years that we’ve been alive”Seb tried to calm his sister down.

“Or maybe it has, and I just wouldn’t know because I’m useless”Ally wailed as she slapped her hands down by her sides.

“Ally, look, everyone’s different everyone develops at different times, one thing I can guarantee is that you’ll be just as good a banshee as your mom is”you reassured Ally, playfully nudging her arm.

“You really mean that?”she smiled over at you, running her hands through her hair.

“One hundred percent”you answered, beaming back at your new friend.

“Apparently I was a nightmare as a child though y’know with all the screaming and stuff”Ally started to reminisce about her childhood whilst you turned to Seb who was stuffing his face with chocolate.

“And you, what are you?”you enquired, trying to stifle a laugh as chocolate fell out of his mouth as he spoke.

“I’m Seb”he replied a little too quickly, you blinked a couple of times wondering if he actually took the time to think about the question being asked.

“No, I mean like what are you, do you have any supernatural abilities?”you asked again, this time slower.

“Oh me? No, I’m just human although I do have a sick whip”he smiled proudly.

“Interesting, what car do you drive?”you questioned, intrigued.

“Roscoe”he answered as his mind wondered dreamily. Your eyebrows knitted together. Confused.

“What brand is Roscoe?- oh so you got the jeep”your mouth formed an ‘O’ shape, thinking about all the stories Derek had told you about the blue jeep failing the pack. You rotated to face the field once more. Not wanting to have a debate with Seb about his ‘not so sick whip’.

“Oh shoot, we’re gonna be late to our next lesson”Phoebe pushed herself up from the seat in front of you. You all said your goodbyes for the time being, all splitting up to go to your different destinations.

Phoebe dropped you off outside your lesson, which unfortunately was Chemistry. You hadn’t yet experienced a Beacon Hills chemistry lesson but you were about to find out what it was like.

“I’ll meet you outside of the nurses office so we can have break together”Phoebe pinches your cheek before disappearing out of sight.

“Great tour guide you are Pheebs I don’t even know where that is”you muttered as you made your way into the classroom.

“Ah, here she is”the teacher ushered you to the front of the class.

“Everyone could I have your attention please... and that doesn’t mean put your earphones in and pretend to listen to what I’m saying” the teacher started to complain.

“If you haven’t met her already this is y/n Hale, she’s new here so please make her feel welcome”he spoke out to the whole room, getting no replies except for some grunting and whispering.

“So this year we're partnering everyone up because last year the grades that were submitted just weren't good enough so as a school we're hoping that if we team you up it will make it easier for the work to be completed on time"He informed you.

You nodded in response, not that your grades would help anyone you hated Science. Your eyes focused on his name tag. Mr. Harper scanned the room searching for a empty seat.

"Ah, perfect"he concluded his search as he lead you over to the right side of the class.

"Teddy"he called out trying to get a students attention.

A boy with platinum blonde hair turned to face you, his mouth parted slightly as his eyes roamed up and down. You shuffled around on your feet uncomfortably.

"This is your new partner, try not to set her on fire like you did to my classroom"the teacher rolled his eyes leaving you with the male.

"That was a funny one Mr.H, you really just won’t let that go will you?”The boy you assumed to be Teddy retorted before flipping his middle finger up at Mr.Harper who had his back turned to the class.

"Aren't you going to introduce yourself?"Teddy watched you as you perched down in the seat next to his. You figured that if he was asking that question then he definitely was not listening when the teacher had introduced you to the class.

"Introductions are overrated"you shrugged, pulling out your empty book, you really didn’t have the energy to spark up conversation about your last name. Especially as you still weren’t sure as to who was supernatural and who wasn’t. You had to be cautious.

"I guess i'll go first then, the names Teddy Dunbar"he ignored your previous comment, leaning forwards whilst chewing on his pen lightly.

Your eyes sparkled at this revelation and it seemed as if Beacon Hills really was a Beacon for the supernatural.

"As in, Liam Dunbar?"you asked inquisitively.

He frowned.

"Look I know, it really does suck my dad being the lacrosse coach and all but please-

You let out a laugh.

"Wait, Liam Dunbar is the coach here?!"You gawped. Excited that you'd be able to meet another one of the original McCall pack members.

"You didn't know did you? So I really did just drop myself in it"Teddy facepalmed before pinching the bridge of his nose.

"How do you know my father?"Teddy stopped rambling for a second.

“Let’s just say our parents are acquainted”you sighed, not wanting to get into the hundreds of stories you had heard about Liam and his days as a beta.

"You're Y/n Hale?! The new girl who wolfed out the other day in the quad I knew I recognised you!"Teddy grew excited, slapping his pen down on his page.

You didn't understand why he was working up a fuss about this, it really wasn't one of your best moments.

"Thanks for bringing that up"you muttered, finding yourself chewing on your own pen.

“It's okay you know, I've lost control so many times during school hours”he tried to comfort you.

“And no ones seen you?”you asked.

“Not that I know of, I’ve kinda picked up some tips and tricks I’m getting better with my anger”he nodded slowly.

"You do know about the McCall pack right?!"you checked, hoping that you hadn't revealed any secrets. You also had successfully found a way to change the conversation subject.

“Of course I do, I know about everything my Dad never stops talking about it"he shook his head.

“So you know the Stilinski's and the Mccall's?"you quizzed.

“More than I'd like to, our parents are literally stuck to the hip, especially recently”he grumbled out the last part , jotting down some notes before pushing them toward you so that you could catch up. You were just about to ask another question when Mr.Harper announced that you would have to go library to do some research.

Teddy offered to stay behind so that he could take notes from the lesson for you since you would have to catch up, making sure that he wrote down the names of the books you'd have to retrieve.

“"Are you gonna be okay finding the Library all by yourself?"he queried as you began to back away from the table you now shared.

"I'm sure I'll find it...eventually"you sent him a not so convincing thumbs up before disappearing back into the corridor, realising that you didn't have a clue where to go.

Following the signs to the library had made it much easier for you to navigate around, taking mental note of the different directions you had been taking. After what seemed like hours you finally stood outside of the library doors.

When you entered the library you immediately had visions of your father telling you about the shelf where everyone had engraved their names. You used the labels to guide you around the maze filled with books.

You sighed to yourself, knowing that it would take you hours to find the books you needed. As you approached your destination it seemed as though someone had already done the job for you, all of the books were scattered around on the floor and a girl with deep black hair sat in front of the shelf flicking through the pages of a textbook.

Her hand tracing over some initials that even your amazing eye sight couldn’t read. You slowly approached the girl, not wanting to alarm her. She glimpsed up at you, nodding to herself as if she was having a conversation, the girl pushed herself up from the floor picking up another book resting it carefully on the metal shelf.

The girl looked up at you, her eyes narrowing as she reached up, taking out her earphones.

“I’ll call you later”she spoke quickly and she presumably hung up on the person at the other end of the line.

“Hi, sorry if I was interrupting”you apologised sincerely. The long haired girl stayed silent, just watching you.

“You’re new here”she stared forwards at the writing on the shelf. Was it really that obvious?

You stared down at her satchel, her name neatly written out on white tape.

Lottie Yukimura

"You're Kira Yukimura's daughter?!"you blurted out excitedly. You knew she was a kitsune, from the way her eyes burned bright. You fell silent, not wanting your statement to come out weird, like you were being intrusive.

Today really was just getting becomimg more interesting by the second, however something had crossed your mind many times.

“Do I know you?"she asked bitterly as she snatched up her bag.

"No-no sorry, not personally but our parents knew eachother"you enlightened her, offering her a small friendly smile. Usually you would have given an equal amount of attitude back but you really didn't want to be attacked by a moody Kitsune on your third day.

"Second name?"she bluntly asked.

“Hale”

“Derek and Braeden?"She enquired again, relaxing a little.

"That's my mom and dad"you answered. Suddenly the conversation shifted and she became very uneasy. As if she had caught onto something.

“I'm sorry I have to go"she mumbled at a fast pace before briskly disappearing into the library.

"Nice to meet you too"you shook your head disappointedly as you bent down to start picking up the books she’d left behind.

[spicycreativity]

Soft-Shoe Shuffle - Ch 9

Chapter: 9/12 Additional Notes: See Ch 1 for more information. Read on AO3 under "WizardGlick." Any formatting/italics errors are holdovers from AO3 that I was too lazy to fix. Chapter Content Warnings: N/A; ask to tag Excerpt: "You don't think he's in love with you, do you?" Roman asked in a strained tone. Silence. "Do you?" Roman demanded. "Oh my god," Virgil said through gritted teeth. Janus could practically hear his jaw creaking. "Virgil!" Roman whisper-shouted.

That's my story and I'm stickin' to it

That's my life and all that I've got

Call me a liar, call me a writer

Believe me or not, believe me or not

The sound of a door open and closing startled Janus out of his dreams so violently that he jerked and gasped before falling still again.

Silence followed, but he kept his eyes closed and tried to orient himself. He felt like Remus had used him as a training dummy and remembered very little of the reason why .

Roman's voice broke the silence. "It's not your shift yet, Smoke on the Water."

"I thought you could use the company," Virgil said. "And maybe I missed you."

"Oh, don't lie." Roman sighed and his breath ghosted over Janus' cheek. He was close, then. "That's his job."

Virgil scoffed. "Not anymore, apparently."

Janus focused on keeping his breathing even. It wouldn't do to get caught now of all times.

"You don't buy it?" Roman asked.

"I don't know!" Virgil exclaimed, loud enough to make Janus flinch. In a softer voice, he continued, "I guess people can change. I mean, I did. But it was gradual, and this seems… It seems awfully sudden for a change of heart, especially for someone as stubborn as him."

"You don't think he's in love with you, do you?" Roman asked in a strained tone.

Silence.

"Do you?" Roman demanded.

"Oh my god," Virgil said through gritted teeth. Janus could practically hear his jaw creaking.

"Virgil!" Roman whisper-shouted.

"Have you noticed Patton calling him 'honey'?" Virgil whispered back.

"Wait… You don't think--"

"I don't know!"

"But Patton wouldn't--" Roman tripped over the end of his sentence. "Not him-- "

"You don't just fall in love overnight. What if this some… some campaign for Patton's love?"

"Like a quest?" Roman asked.

Janus nearly laughed. Leave it to Virgil to land three steps to the left of the correct conclusion. And leave it to Roman to spur him on.

Despite the ache in his joints and desperate dryness of his mouth, Janus could feel his mind sliding back toward sleep. There would be no fighting it unless he moved, and he couldn't move without giving up the game.

Oh, well.

"It makes sense, doesn't it?" Virgil asked. "Janus doesn't apologize. Janus doesn't do anything unless it serves some sort of end."

"And where does collapsing in my room factor into this master plan?"

"I don't know," Virgil said. "Maybe this part was just bad luck." He sighed and pulled the covers higher up Janus' chest. "It's weird seeing him like this?"

"...Asleep?"

"No, genius. Vulnerable. He doesn't show weakness either."

"Ah, Virgil," Roman said delicately, after a moment's silence. "Not that I'm the best at math, mind you, but something isn't adding up."

"What do you mean?"

"According to Logan, Janus knew he was sick when he came to visit me. Nearly fainted in the kitchen, from what he said. If he's so averse to showing weakness, as you say, why wouldn't he just, you know, wait?"

"...Huh."

"And why would he apologize to me in private? If he wanted to look good in front of Patton, surely he would have found some way to confront me in front of Patton. Janus is still a part of Thomas; he likes an audience. "

Virgil let out a short puff of air through his nose and said nothing for a few moments. "Well… Maybe I shouldn't jump to conclusions like that."

"It's good that you want to be careful," Roman said with undisguised fondness in his voice. Janus almost frowned. Roman and Virgil, really?

"I guess I'll have to wait and see. I really want to know why he keeps calling my name. Rem-- Uh. Okay. Remus said he did it a bunch yesterday."

"He's not Voldemort; you can say his name around me."

"I don't want to make you upset, that's all."

Virgil's words spun lazy circles in Janus' mind, and whatever Roman replied was lost in the rolling fog.

He had expected Virgil to be mistrustful of him; he had every right to be. Janus had expected him to make conspiracies out of nothing and it didn't hurt his feelings.

It also didn't make him happy, not at all, that Roman had defended him with nothing to gain from it.

Sleep came languid and slow, and for once not accompanied by tongues of fire.

--

Maybe it was luck or maybe it was Virgil's sense of duty, but the next time Janus opened his eyes, it was Virgil that he saw.

Virgil's eyes widened almost comically and he froze.

For a moment, they just stared at each other. Then Janus regained his wits and said, in a tone like they were coworkers who had just passed each other in the hall, "Good morning, Virgil."

Virgil opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again. "It's afternoon."

"Well. Forgive me for not counting the hours when I was unconscious," Janus said with venom. Because he was scared.

Virgil scowled at him. "Whatever. Glad you're not dead. I'll go get Patton now."

"No, wait." Janus tried to sit up, hating how his arms shook. He brought out another set to assist, as Virgil seemed disinclined to help, or do anything other than just stare at him. "Force of habit."

"Yeah," Virgil said. "I heard you were on an honesty campaign." The disdain in his voice was almost painful. "Let me guess: You're so sorry for how you treated me in the past. You were jealous because I got what you always wanted and you didn't know how to handle it so you lashed out like the snake you are. And then you couldn't apologize because you were trapped in the image you'd created for yourself, only now, now it's falling down around you and you don't even have your precious pride to stand on, and now there's only one thing left to do." Virgil broke off, a little out of breath. "So you come crawling on your belly to me. The last item on your little 'good person' checklist."

Janus shook , and no amount of blankets could melt the ice that crawled down his veins. Virgil's image blurred, cold tears threatening to spill over. And really, what did Janus have left to lose? Hadn't he earned this? At the end of the day, he was the architect of his own demise.

"For what's it's worth, Virgil," he said, his voice so cracked and rasping he barely even recognized it, "I am sorry. I was jealous. And… I tied my own hands. I see that now."

"So you're saying…" Virgil straightened a little. "You were wrong?"

"Yes, Virgil. I was wrong."

Virgil laughed.

He doubled over, shoulders spasming, and laughed until his face turned red and tears ran down his cheeks. "I can't-- I can't believe this…"

"Um, Virgil?" Janus' humiliation gave way to concern as Virgil's breaths became more and more erratic.

"You have no idea how long I've been waiting to hear you say," Virgil said. "I had so many ideas for how I was going to throw it back in your stupid, smug snake face." He wiped his eyes even as more tears fell.

Janus just stared at him.

"Here's what's funny," Virgil continued. "Now… Now that it finally happened and I have you right where I want you, I don't want to do it ."

"You--" Janus' heart leapt. "You believe me?"

"I believe you." Virgil looked at him, eyes still shining. "But only because you look so sweet holding that teddy bear."

"What?" Janus looked down and realized with a jolt that he did indeed have a stuffed bear tucked under his arm. It was pale brown with white felt on the paws and ears, and was wearing a little T-shirt with 'get well beary soon!' printed on it. "Patton."

"Patton," Virgil said with a nod.

Janus looked around properly for the first time and he realized that Patton was not the only one who had left a gift.

A magnificent bouquet of white roses dominated his nightstand, nearly overshadowing a smaller bouquet of baby's breath and hydrangeas in a Mason jar. Behind the vases stood a 6-pack of blue Gatorade, and balanced on the lids was a small, handmade book.

Virgil noticed him staring and passed over one of the Gatorades, breaking the seal on the lid so Janus wouldn't have to struggle with it.

"Um, Virgil," Janus said, taking a shaky sip and realizing he wasn't wearing his gloves. He grit his teeth and tried not to mind. "I do understand if you don't want to be around me right away."

Virgil shook his head. "I'm done being mad."

"...Just like that?"

"I…" Virgil bit down hard on his lip. "I'm making the choice to forgive you. And maybe I'm being naïve and maybe you'll sink your fangs into my neck the second my guard is down, but… Well, you know, maybe for once the best-case scenario will happen and we'll all be best friends and Thomas will never have problems again."

Janus smiled. "You've changed, Virgil. A lot."

"Yeah, well." Virgil shrugged. "So have you, I think."

Janus raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

Virgil leaned in, his grin wolfish and wide. "You're still holding the teddy bear."

Janus' face burned, but he for once made no effort to hide it. "It was a gift, Virgil, it would be rude to--"

"Stop snuggling it and put it with your other gifts?"

Janus closed his eyes and let his head rest against his headboard. "Yes."

"Airtight argument," Virgil said, but the laughter was gone from his voice. "I should get Logan. And you should finish your Gatorade. You probably feel pretty shitty, huh?"

"No, Virgil, I feel fantastic."

"I'm gonna let that slide because you're half-dead."

"Mm." Janus slid further down, gently aware of the Gatorade bottle tipping in his hand.

"Okay." Virgil grabbed the bottle. "No spilling. I'm gonna leave this here with a straw in it. You'd better drink some."

"Okay," Janus said, though he had no intention of doing so. Exhaustion washed over him, a rising tide promising to drag him under.

"You know, once word gets out that you're… not, like, delirious anymore, everybody's going to come running."

"Then don't tell," Janus mumbled, rolling over and pulling the covers up over his head.

"Are you really going back to sleep? You just woke up!"

"Just readjusting."

"Sure."

Janus sighed and wriggled so just his face was poking out from underneath the covers. "Happy?"

"I just don't think you should go back to sleep without drinking something. And no, one tiny sip of Gatorade doesn't count."

"You want to talk to me." Janus was too tired to properly revel in his information, so he settled for a smirk. It was difficult to do with half his face smushed into the mattress, but he was well-practiced.

"Keep pushing and I'm gonna start reading to you from Remus' book of dirty limericks. He hand-wrote that for you, by the way."

"What?" Janus fought to keep the nervous edge out of his voice.

"He said it was an inside joke."

With a concentrated effort, Janus sent the booklet to the top shelf of his closet. He doubted even Remus was reckless enough to expose Janus'... total lack of romantic feelings for Patton in such a careless manner, but still. Better safe than sorry. "Virgil?"

"Hm?"

"What did you get me? I assume the roses are from Roman and the Gatorade is from Logan."

"And the blue flowers are from Patton also."

"Surely they guilt-tripped you into livening up my deathbed as well?"

"My gift was more... abstract."

"Not smothering me to death with Patton's teddy bear does not count as a gift."

"Oh, no." Virgil smirked. "I told Patton how you really take your coffee."

The uncomfortable feeling of being not only seen, but known made Janus hide his face under the comforter again. "You didn't."

"Oh, I did. He knows all about your whipped cream addiction."

" Virgil."

"You're welcome, honey."

Janus went completely still. Half-formed memories of Roman and Virgil conversing in his room swam around his head and oh. Virgil had guessed it. Part of it, anyway. Janus had thought he'd let it go with the rest of his little conspiracy theory, but… And now he'd just completely missed his chance to bluff. He tried anyway. "If this is your way of calling me sweet--"

"Busted," Virgil interrupted.

"Go back to being scared of me," Janus muttered into the blankets.

"Look," Virgil said, voice deadly serious. "I can't tell you what to do, but I swear to all things dark and stormy, if you break Patton's heart, I'll break you ."

"I don't--" Janus tried. "I-- We're not…" He made an exaggerated, high-pitched coughing sound. "I'm going to tell Logan that you antagonized me while I was trying to sleep."

"Oh, please."

"And Patton and I aren't-- He doesn't-- He doesn't feel that way about me."

"That fever must have evaporated some of your brain cells," Virgil said.

Janus was inclined to agree, although for different reasons-- He couldn't think of a single way to change the subject. He settled for a long, drawn-out hiss.

"Just talk to him, okay?" Virgil said. "Or don't. Actually, don't."

"I don't need your permission to start dating Patton," Janus spat, forgetting himself.

"So you do want to date him."

"...No."

"I believe you."

"I'm going back to sleep now."

"Gatorade first." Virgil drew the covers back and held the bottle up to Janus. There was a straw in it now, a purple bendy straw that poked Janus in the lip. He fixed Virgil with a death glare and was privately relieved to see Virgil shrink back under its intensity. Like a river changing course, the parts of Janus that made him who he was were still there, even if his direction had altered.

That was good enough for him.

But he still wasn't going to let Virgil nurse him like he was some kind of helpless baby animal.

Careful not to drop the teddy bear, Janus sat up and took the bottle from Virgil. He drank half of it before his shaking hands gave up on him.

"Go to sleep," Virgil said, setting the bottle on the nightstand. "I'll tell the others not to crowd you." He turned to leave.

Janus almost let him. "Thank you, Virgil. And…" He'd had quite enough of showing his belly, and yet…. "I really am sorry. For everything."

"I know, Janus. Get some rest."

[punkscowardschampions]

Ava & Grace

Ava: Hey Grace: 👋 Ava: How'd it go with gym boy? Grace: 🤞 he's got the hint 👻 Ava: That good, huh Ava: how about the rest, you know, not boys? Grace: we so aren't here to talk about me Ava: Come on Ava: Give me some normal conversation right now Grace: !!!!!!!!! Grace: 100% not gonna be that bitch, talk to ME about what's going on in your oh so dramatic life! Grace: are you okay? Ava: Okay, okay Ava: I'll just come out with it Ava: no sugarcoating Grace: Duh 🚫🍫🍬🍭 Grace: it's not a cheat day Ava: 🤫🤫🤫 Ava: You wanna hear this hot, hot tea or nah Grace: obvs Ava: You'll be the least surprised so there's that Grace: 🚫😱😱😱 Ava: You know when you came here and then married guy couldn't come and then everything fizzled out? Ava: well, it actually did, for nearly a month Ava: but then he came back Grace: OMG Grace: it's literally the MOST 💖📽🎞 like FORGET before Ava: It really was Ava: remember when I got hit by that cyclist? Grace: that was so wild! OH was he the 🚴??? Ava: 😂 Ava: Imagine Grace: your otp Ava: But no, my parents were out of town Ava: and he came to the hospital, to make sure I was okay Ava: and he took me home and looked after me Grace: I'm like about to cry???!!! that's so Grace: 😍😍 Ava: Me too Ava: and of course, I had to go on Holiday like immediately after so that was shit but since then we've been talking and Ava: he's divorcing his wife Grace: I TOLD YOU HE WAS PURE Ava: I know Ava: and I'm sorry I had to kinda lie to you Ava: but I accidentally let slip I had talked to you and he freaked and that's why he first left so Grace: Oh please, if I filmed a storytime about this ALL the comments would be calling me out as #fake Grace: I get it Ava: It does sound pretty unbelievable Ava: even more so if I actually tell you who he is Grace: are you GOING TO???!! 😱😱😱 Ava: May as well, I've had to tell Nancy Ava: Parents and Buster to go Grace: Ugh! so sorry babes Ava: I couldn't tell you before 'cos they kinda know him Ava: knew him Ava: he was one of Buster's friends from School Ava: and his crazy wife is the main girl who bullied Nancy so Ava: that was fun Grace: Really?! wtf Grace: Chelsea is like Grace: so weirdly small Ava: That's why we call 'em villages, even though you're in a big city, the actual communities are ridiculously close-knit, for better and worse Ava: oh and Ava: make it weirder still Ava: you remember that boy from my party, Teddy? Grace: UM obvs I never forget a 💋 Ava: Well, that's his brother Grace: !!!!!!!!!!!!! Grace: do they look alike cos 🧸 is 😍😍 like 🙏🙏 Ava: Kinda Ava: [sends a cute photo he would've been able to send to the fake profile] Grace: oh Grace: my Grace: god Ava: I know Ava: 😩😍 Grace: did he edit his 👀??! I'm so shook 💙 Ava: No, I've seen them up close Ava: they're actually that unreal Grace: I can't even Ava: Guess what Grace: ?? Ava: He said he loves me Grace: NO WAY Grace: 😭😭😭😭 Ava: I know, I know Ava: I can't even Grace: so are you like a thing™ now? Ava: Yeah Ava: that's why I'm telling everyone Grace: Your parents are gonna be so Ava: Ugh Ava: it's going to be a whole thing Ava: with all of them Grace: mhhmmm Grace: like I feel like I know the answer but how did Nancy take it?? Ava: She just Ava: does my head in at the best of times and this was no exception, sadly Grace: at least Buster can't be telling ANYONE how to live their lives Grace: especially 😍💖 Ava: Watch him try though Ava: I'm expecting it though, they'll have to get over it on their own time Grace: 🙄 Grace: I feel that, Ri always thinks she can tell me something Ava: It's so Grace: IKR Grace: full offense babes I'm gonna listen to Janis before you & like no Ava: It's gonna be hellish but they can't do anything about it Grace: 🙏💜🤞 Ava: unless they do in which case bye and feel free to go through my wardrobe 🤷 Grace: duh Grace: but watch me also take your man Ava: 😏 cheek Grace: my crazy would look 😇 next to his ex's Grace: love that for me Ava: 'Til I haunt you crazier Grace: so scared obvs Ava: 😒 Ava: I only just got him, you can't be stealing him Grace: so sorry but like gotta get the full set on that fam now Ava: You better 🙏 my parents take it that personal Grace: 😇🙏💜 Grace: Jesus is totally my bae so Ava: and God's favourite son Ava: leave mine alone 😉 Grace: 😂😂 Ava: So you're not mad at me now, yeah? Grace: lowkey 💔 but not mad Ava: awh please Grace: ILY bitch you know it Ava: ily too 💙 Grace: & now I don't have to 👻💔 his brother so Grace: no way he'll be hitting me up after this Ava: Oh yeah, you're welcome for doing your dirtywork Grace: 💜😂💜 Ava: Has he hit you up then? 👀 Grace: 🤐🤐🤐 Ava: After I just poured my heart out? Ava: Rudeness Grace: you're in a 📽🎞💖 I'm in a 📽🎞😱 starring my crazy Ava: Girl, please Grace: I'm so serious Grace: & so over it Ava: You're not crazy Grace: I'm not not Grace: ask gym boy, but like don't Ava: I'm not gonna sleuth on you, don't worry Grace: if you had you'd see 🧸 on my pics hitting the 💜 Ava: Cute Ava: he must like you or he'd air you Ava: it's not unheard of Grace: like I said, thanks for putting that work in for me babes Ava: 😒 why not talk to him Ava: you don't have to see him 24/7 Grace: well duh I'm not about to move in with you Grace: but that's not why I can't Ava: ? Grace: he's like Grace: & I'm like Grace: It's not gonna be a thing Ava: You can't be friends? Grace: 😂😂 no Grace: that's as terrifying OMG Ava: 🙄 he is NOT scary Ava: though he is gonna hate me now probably so loyalties Grace: UM yeah he is Grace: he's nice & so I'm scared of him Grace: @ gym boy too Ava: 🤔 Grace: ugh whatever Ava: You're a nice person, you should hang with other nice people Grace: 🙄🙄 Grace: I've got friends he doesn't need to be one Ava: Okay Ava: not my otp, not gonna push that hard Grace: or ours its fine Grace: he won't be 😭😭😭 Ava: 'Course Ava: gonna have bigger problems to deal with, lbr Ava: 😬 Grace: yeah exactly Grace: maybe we can bond when the wife murders you but like Grace: black isn't my fave tbh can't 🤞 I'll serve my best look Ava: Funny 😏 Ava: she's actually 'out of the country' rn so you should probably watch your back 🔪🔪 Grace: you're so not gonna come visit me now you're 😍😍😍 are you? Grace: are you even doing holiday 2? Ava: time is getting away from us Ava: summer holiday standard Ava: it lowkey has not been organized so god knows now, I wouldn't be mad if it didn't but I wouldn't not go, I guess Grace: depends how they take your homewrecker status Ava: Yep, cheers 👍 Grace: people are shady Ava: Sure Ava: but my actual friend friends will know what's up Ava: everyone else chats about us anyway Grace: true Grace: shoutout to the fam for that one Ava: at least this one is something I actually did so Ava: oh well Grace: anyone who has a clue about his ex will know it's not even you Grace: like sorry hun you killed that 💍 yourself Ava: I'm not too fussed, it's my last year 💁 Grace: #priorities Ava: Exactly Grace: still so triggered by the idea of going back though thanks Grace: school is the WORST Ava: tell me about it Ava: won't miss that place Ava: Chelsea in general moreso but it isn't like I'll be a million miles away Grace: unlike me always a ✈ away Ava: Do you reckon you'll stay in Dublin? Grace: I guess Grace: where else would I go? Ava: You aren't going to make like Billie and Nancy and bounce then? Grace: being a or sleeping with models isn't very likely for me, babes Ava: Models are usually weird looking anyways Ava: oops accidental shade at your sister 🙊 Ava: don't tell Grace: thanks? I think Grace: shade her all you want, I'm about it Ava: How many times have you seen her kid? Grace: Like none Grace: we might get christmas but Ava: this family is messy Ava: watch me get lectured like it ain't Grace: preach Grace: maybe I shouldn't stay here Ava: you could stay or go wherever Ava: everywhere needs beauticians Grace: not Chelsea though, I'd run into your boyfriend's wife Grace: obvs can't escape anyone there Ava: 😂 truly Ava: I don't wanna be far away from the fam Ava: cracked as they are Ava: but that's just me Ava: I guess it isn't automatically selfish to move yourself halfway 'cross the globe hmm Grace: same though, I even miss Junie & like ?? why Grace: never saw him when we lived in the same house Ava: yeah Ava: that whole situation still fucks me off I Ava: idk Ava: I know it's not the kid's fault but I can barely even look at pictures of her Grace: Ri never should've done it Grace: like he didn't need a kid that bad Grace: obvs he didn't actually need one at all but nobody NEEDS one Ava: If they'd been together any amount of time Ava: Junior wasn't 20 fucking years old Ava: it was really stupid Ava: Buster said but oh well Grace: Demi is so Grace: I can't Ava: This family can't seem to help but add more fucked up people into its sphere Ava: like Ro hadn't just brought Drew back, AGAIN Grace: Getting pregnant by accident is one thing, like it's stupid but okay Grace: they planned that Ava: This family has way too many baby hangups dating back to nan Ava: can't blame her for all of this but break the cycle, someone, damn Grace: literally had my contraception on 🔒 since I was 13 thank you Ava: 'Accident' is some bullshit 9/10 times tbh Ava: you knew it was a matter of time, even if you don't know you knew it Grace: @ my mum & dad so hard Ava: and mine, they say the twins were an accident but they probably would've broke up if they hadn't have had them at that time so Grace: mhmmm Ava: ugh Ava: I'm just heated knowing how hard I'm gonna have to defend this Ava: like I've got myself pregnant Grace: don't even joke, she trapped that poor boy so hard like Ava: seriously, he probably never wants kids again Ava: not that I've asked because it's been like a month or so and I'm not psychotic, thanks Grace: do you? not now obvs Ava: I don't know Ava: like, don't tell my mother but I don't actually meticulously plan every aspect of my life Ava: if I ended up at a place and time in my life where it felt right, I could see it Ava: but if I ended up living a different life where they wouldn't fit, I wouldn't and I wouldn't be 💔 about that Grace: 😂🤐 Ava: Do you? Grace: girl, I'm too freaked out to let a boy date me, I don't think it's gonna happen Ava: you won't be 16 forever Ava: and if Ro can manage it Ava: your mum and Drew are probably the only people to see her vaguely undressed in her life Grace: idk sometimes it's all I want & sometimes it's the WORST thing I could think of Ava: I get that Ava: I don't think its a thing you can overthink, 'cos it's not usually right or wrong Ava: so people just do it and have to deal, better or worse Grace: Yeah Grace: maybe I'll get like that with dating Grace: or you know, get so lonely that I won't care that people always leave Ava: 😔 Ava: You'll get there, whether there is living your best life with or without Ava: I'm defs getting left after this fiasco so I'll come 😭 to you in a few no doubt Ava: we're walking Frank rn, so gonna enjoy this whilst it lasts 👌🥰 Grace: UM no! He LOVES you remember, you'll come at me with your 😍 more like Ava: 🤞🤞 Grace: 🙏💜

[punkscowardschampions]

Ava & James

Ava: I've told all my family James: oh Ava: Maybe don't oh that hard Ava: thinking you've changed your mind and that's going to be very difficult to do a 180 on tbh James: I'm actually thinking about Bella's dad's reaction Ava: As far as I'm aware, my dad doesn't have a shotgun Ava: or an excellent moustache Ava: definitely not James: Mine does, on both counts, but the mentality simply isn't there James: war of words is as far as things have so far escalated Ava: That's a good visual Ava: what about your mum? James: she's very busy lining up every single woman she's aware of between the ages of 20 to 30 within a mile radius or so Ava: Very Mr Darcy Ava: I'll gatecrash James: I look forward to the dramatic dance scene during which we only touch palms & exchange looks Ava: I bet Lizzie Bennet didn't 😳 Ava: shame my sister isn't around to push over so your parents are forced to take us in whilst she languishes James: 😂 James: I'll happily push my sister over or let her fall through an iced over pond to further our romantic narrative Ava: 💘 Ava: I know it's less about me but I can swoon nonetheless James: if you're 😳 then you'll have my full attention regardless Ava: Promise? James: yes Ava: even if the single ladies have really good period costumes? James: well, I hadn't considered that Ava: 😏 Ava: rude James: before I decide, what are you going to be wearing when you gatecrash? Ava: Obviously something unexpectedly knockout Ava: am the protagonist, need I remind you James: okay, what I'm hearing is anything you already own or could pick out from anywhere given a few moments Ava: You're adorable Ava: how did it go really then? James: does that mean I'll get to see you before there's a seasons changing montage? because I really want to Ava: Providing you don't need to exile yourself, of course James: I'm sure there's now several people in both our lives who would like me to, but I won't Ava: They were as receptive as I expected but I've made it clear I won't be stopping seeing you, hopefully put to bed the concerns I can James: in my case, the only concern is outward appearances so there's very little I can do even if I particularly cared to James: & Teddy isn't concerned so much as shocked & appalled Ava: Of course Ava: at least I'm an addendum re. the main issue of the whole divorce, in that case? Ava: yeah, do you think I should make a point of talking to him or give him space? James: will you? as far as he's concerned I haven't made a good decision within his living memory, but you two are friends, or were Ava: I'll try, definitely Ava: if I can make him see it's as much my decision as yours, it might help, in the end Ava: and I can handle another person having their say James: thank you James: I meant what I said, I'm more than willing to discuss this with your parents, at any point James: I can handle that Ava: Thank you Ava: I think it might help Ava: but I also think I'm gonna give them a cool-off period or it won't be at all helpful and that won't be at all your fault James: understood James: I'm currently having to employ a similar situation with Jay's playdates because her friend's mothers cannot possibly keep their nose out of my business or their mouths shut about where hers is and every other single detail they believe to be fact Ava: Oh lord Ava: I wouldn't have envied you having to socialize by-proxy with the self-professed yummy mummies before but now Ava: I can only imagine Ava: Poor Jay Ava: I can't offer a human child for playdates but Frank is always down Ava: and my lips are, naturally, sealed James: I was hoping to take them away for a few days but it's as though my dad has decided that in lieu of my failings in other areas I need to suddenly become the hardest worker in the history of this company Ava: Of course Ava: Hmm James: because obviously what my children require most in their mother's absence is to also see me less Ava: Well, yeah, that's not potentially traumatizing Ava: thank God for School being right 'round the corner Ava: and Matty still being portable James: I've been bringing them both to the office & the bulging vein in his temple is honestly such a strong contender for the book cover Ava: 😏 That's how you do it Ava: risk his health and wellbeing so you get the time off for yours James: King's didn't teach me everything I know, I've got a few tricks Ava: When are you giving me that tour? James: When can I see you? Ava: When is your dad not working you to death? Ava: I can make it work James: [A pause while he figures that out] James: he's out of the office all day on [a date in the foreseeable to make this office hookup a thing] Ava: No offense but if your brother shows up again you need to send him on a really long coffee run James: as you said, school is right around the corner, meaning my parents priorities have shifted back to making sure he'll go Ava: In that case Ava: 😈 James: 😇 for saying yes Ava: I have ulterior motives, I promise you James: oh really? Ava: really Ava: it's very unfair I've yet to see you in your work clothes James: [sends her a pic because nobody can stop him] Ava: um hello 😍 Ava: you're really going to be away from me looking so good Ava: unfair James: I'm sorry James: I really, really am Ava: Me too Ava: I've not seen you enough to warrant how badly I want to right now James: [a casual essay about how much he misses her and wants her and everything he wishes they could do, in a saucy way but also just in cute ways like] Ava: James James: Ava Ava: I really love you, you know James: I love you too James: what I most wish is that we could go away for a while Ava: That would be Ava: so good Ava: maybe we could in like the Christmas hols, when everything has calmed down Ava: hopefully James: it would be indescribable Ava: I have no doubt you would do your best Ava: and it'd be impressive James: the subject matter lends itself to nothing but my best Ava: I'm honoured🙇 James: so am I, especially by that visual Ava: Gutted I'm out rn and can't immediately fulfill that wish for a visual like you did Ava: when I get back though James: [sends her an even better visual] James: until then, there you are Ava: oh, well, you aren't distracting at all 😖 Ava: definitely gonna get you back when you're so hard at work James: 😈 James: I so badly hope you do Ava: I intend to Ava: every day of the week Ava: but especially when I get to come see you James: you know, the things I intend to do to you on this desk drastically shifts the audience we're going to be able to pitch this book to Ava: You'll have to restrain your imagination in the write-up so the audience can use theirs to fill in the blanks Ava: because there's no way we're leaving your office 'til we've done everything you've thought of James: finally some overtime I'm not upset about Ava: It's all about balance, right? 😇 James: & I'm aware that you've got very good balance Ava: Will that help me be the best good luck charm on your best I can be? 🤔 Ava: intriguing 😋 James: absolutely, but if you need any more help, I'll help you Ava: You're very helpful, baby James: I try to be Ava: I've never met anyone like you James: I don't think I'll ever meet anyone else that comes close to you either James: I certainly haven't before Ava: Good Ava: I don't need to think about competiting so soon James: you don't need to think about it, full stop Ava: not 'til the dance, anyway James: even then, I'll only have eyes for you, that's the cliche Ava: Of course Ava: doesn't mean I'm not gonna do everything within my power to ensure it's worth your 👀s while James: I don't want to dance with anyone else, Ava James: I don't want to do any of this with anyone else Ava: I know Ava: you know I feel the same too James: you know I couldn't have done this without you though Ava: You did it all though, all the hard conversations and hard decisions James: a lot of those decisions were made for me, so there's limited credit due, & a lack of conversation with her just cements that Ava: Yeah but the ball is in her court on that one Ava: you're if not ready at least willing whenever she is James: of course, because that's not a decision, to not act, not any more Ava: yeah, and that's going to be a good thing Ava: even if it is not good all the time James: I'll be interested to see if she gets in contact before school starts because that's unlikely to be a good thing Ava: Yes, I wonder if this is just a summer holiday or Ava: makes you wonder what she's even doing that could keep her so 'busy' James: whoever cleans the pool, probably, not that she'd ever admit to such a cliche Ava: 😬 Ava: definitely not getting paid enough James: 😂 Ava: I'm just glad that right now you don't have to deal with her on the day to day, even if it's only a momentary reprieve, it'll never be that bad again James: me too, I can't & won't pretend that I didn't know how bad it had become but actually getting a break from it makes me wonder how either of us dealt with that for as long as we have Ava: I bet Ava: she must've been as sick of it, even though she was the one not letting go and doing the fucked up shit, that has to be exhausting to live like that Ava: full level hell beast all the time, like 😈 Ava: sorry, I'm not fully sure where the line is re. her Ava: but I've been hearing great things from Nancy and Buster today so, that's in my head James: it's okay, you're not wrong James: & neither are they Ava: Okay Ava: if it's ever weird or like, not up for discussion though, just say the word Ava: or several, as you're especially loquacious James: there's a fantastic word Ava: as far as safewords go Ava: I can think of a few situations where it might be hard to get out but isn't that half the fun James: I'll make a note of it, because yes, that's definitely a large percentage of the thrill Ava: I wish you were here Ava: I only am to get away from my parents for a bit James: where are you? Ava: My friend's house Ava: Her sister is called Stasia, think she was your year-ish? James: I remember her, whether she would me, favourably or otherwise, I can't possibly comment James: I'll take you home when you want to go Ava: Really? Ava: well, I'll go at whatever time means I get some extra with you James: okay, I'll take that as my cue to leave now, not only because any reason to get out of here is welcomed though Ava: Please do Ava: talking about you so much has only made my need to be with you even greater James: I can absolutely relate & admit to having had the same urge all day Ava: Oh good Ava: we're on the same page James: that said, a necessary note in the margin would be that in actual fact I've felt that way much longer, because whatever I'm talking about, I'm thinking about you Ava: Sometimes I think I think about you too much Ava: but then I remember I'm the protagonist in this romance so it's not just acceptable but necessary James: you can do whatever you like, darling, it's your story Ava: In that case Ava: read on James: voraciously Ava: 🤤🤤 James James: I'm just making sure we're still on the same page Ava: You're gonna have trouble keeping me on the page Ava: and making me go home James: & the driver's eyes on the road, we may need more than the Twilight soundtrack on this occasion Ava: Pride & Prejudice 2005? Ava: gotcha, honey James: 😂 James: yes, exactly Ava: 😊 Ava: I love you so much James: I miss you so much James: if I could take you home with me, I very happily would Ava: I know Ava: one day James: after the move to the other side of the river, because we both know there is a line Ava: It's pretty exciting, isn't it? James: I'm glad to hear you think so because I was going to ask you if you'd like to come house hunting with me Ava: I'd love to! James: [a possible date soonish] ? Ava: That should be good for me Ava: I'll let you know if otherwise Ava: it'll be nice to look at some actual decent places, let's face it, I doubt my student digs will be all that inspiring, like 😏 James: barely room for whatever hazing pranks they have in store, I'm sure Ava: I'm still not convinced that particular visual doesn't just come from a certain type of movie, babe James: you'll have to let me know 😏 Ava: I'll make it good for you James: my faith in you remains unwavering Ava: 🙇 James: have you reconsidered your stance on spoilers? Ava: That does depend James: oh? Ava: have you dumped fake girl? James: she was very slow to accept her fate, but yes Ava: I can't blame her Ava: I wouldn't wanna lose you either Ava: [picture, assumedly in her friend's room or somewhere not just in front of them like oh hey] James: Ava Ava: Make traffic move faster please James: I'll do the quickest rewrite possible & see you at your friend's door Ava: I'll be waiting so patiently James: & I'll be waiting impatiently James: 😇 & 😈 Ava: I think you deserve to be 😈 right now Ava: been a long day, yeah? James: yes, though it feels longer now, stretching out with the queued traffic Ava: 🥺 Ava: we'll just have to see it as motivation to not waste a single second James: it's a promise, in or out of traffic Ava: I'm so lucky James: if you think you are, then I need a better word to describe my own fortune right now Ava: I'm just really happy Ava: in spite of anything else, everything else, right now James: good, me too Ava: 🥰 Ava: you deserve that even more James: you deserve more than I can possibly give you, however patiently you wait Ava: nuuh James: yes you do Ava: 😣 Ava: no Ava: and I want you James: I want you, I'm well aware that it doesn't mean I deserve to have you Ava: How could you possibly not James: because James: the reasons I lack words to describe you aren't even close to the reasons I lack them to describe myself Ava: but I can't describe you either Ava: not just because I'm no writer James: but you do, all the time, in both words & actions I can vividly see myself the way you think of me Ava: I'm glad Ava: keep looking, okay Ava: we'll work on the believing bit James: okay James: if you'd like to get in the car, we can start immediately