#idk I just know they’re burned out from writing and it makes me sad they don’t seem as enthusiastic

[petrovna-zamo]

[moody-alcoholic]

Truth

I am not ignorant to the fact I’m writing a gay sex scene and everyone is hanging out in Syria. Resources below.

Guardians of Equality Movement

Syria LGBTQI+ Resources

Equaldex LGBT rights in Syria

I cant stop writing for this series. Every time I say I'll take a break I pump out another outline...

MDNI +18 content

Summary: Ghoap x Reader, throuple. Slow burn (sorry but not sorry). 2.7k words. Reader is female (she/her), army nurse, non descript physical features, names used: Ashe.

CW: MDNI +18 content Mentions of torture, torture, smut, blowjob (male receiving & giving), language. First proper Johnny x Simon scene, IDK it just felt right...

Previous parts - masterlist - next part

Enjoy <3

Johnny was grabbing something to eat in the canteen when he watched Ghost walked over to him. He knew something was wrong, he had that cold look in his eyes. The one he gets when he has to focus on the job and nothing else matters, not even him. Johnny swallowed hard standing up to meet Ghost. 

“Come.” It’s all he says but it makes the hairs stand up on the back of Johnny’s neck. Johnny follows they walk into an observation room. Johnny gasps when he sees you handcuffed the table head hanging down.

“What happened?” Johnny asked looking round the room his eyes falling on Jack who’s stood there arms crossed. 

“We believe she’s responsible for the murder of the doctor.” Jack says. Johnny laughs, looking around at everyone else being serious.

“Christ, what’s the evidence?” Johnny asked.

“Her ID was used to withdraw large amounts of insulin which is believed to be the cause of death.” Johnny looked at Jack shocked then at Price. 

“Has she said anything?” Johnny asked feeling sick. There is no way you did that, this has to be a set up, something… Johnny just knew it in his gut, you were innocent.

“No, she’s not talking.” Price said, Johnny could hear something in his voice. Sadness? Annoyance?

“I heard you are very good at your job lieutenant,” Jack says taking a step closer to Ghost. 

“‘Pends on what you heard.” Ghost replies remaining still, looking through the one way glass you’ve not moved, not wanting them to see your pained expression.

“I heard you can get people to talk, and we really need her to talk.” Jack says. 

“We can try other ways before sending Ghost in.” Price says. Jack scoffs.

“If she’s been trained by the enemy she won’t break.” He says walking to the door. 

“You have 24 hours to get her to talk or you’re out of here.” Everyone looked at Price. He went to sit down.

“You heard him, make her talk.” Price says.

“We don’t torture innocent people.” Ghost’s voice is level, he still hasn’t moved. 

“We’re not torturing anyone just question her you’ve got to buy me some time, look like you’re doing your jobs so I can figure out a solution.” Price sighs.    

“It’s wrong.” Johnny says. Price sighs again getting up. 

“LT, Gaz go to security I want anything you can find, from the moment she wakes up in the morning to the second she’s asleep. She takes a piss I want to know about it, where her card was swiped who has seen her anything, and quickly before Jack can replace staff.” Price says as he walks over to Johnny. 

“Come on let’s go have a chat with her, maybe she’ll tell us something useful” Price says his hand on Johnny’s shoulder. Johnny knows Price is trying to calm him but there is nothing on the face of the world right not that can slow his mind. He looks back through the window, guilt rises up as Ghost and Gaz leave the room. It’s times like this Johnny envies Simon being able to hide his face. Price squeezes his shoulder he looks in Price’s eyes, they look sad understanding. It doesn't make Johnny feel any better.

—————————— 

You can’t look at Simon’s eyes when he’s the room, the caramel eyes you used to lose yourself in, they’re just dark now, dark and uncaring. Johnny’s in sometimes, he won’t even look at you let alone in your eyes any more, the eyes you used to look in for comfort, love, hope. You don’t know what's worse. Price is the one who questions you, always the same questions. 

How did you do it? 

Why did you do it? 

Who do you work for? 

How long have you known about 141? 

Did you get close to them on purpose? 

Did you use them to get information on 141? 

Why?

He never says their names, Johnny, Simon. It’s always just ‘them’ he doesn’t have to say their names, you know who he means. Maybe you did betray them? Maybe this was all your fault? 

By the second day you can’t remember the doctors name, just the fact he’s leaving a kid and a wife behind. You’re moved into a windowless cell, you’re woken up at random times, you’re starting to lose track of time. It’s only after what you think is the third day it becomes violent. Jack is the only one who’s violent, he’s around a lot more, there are new questions. 

Why this base? 

Why now? 

Do you know anything about the arms sales to Al-qatala? 

Have you ever been to Urzikstan? 

Why kill an innocent doctor? 

Why insulin? 

Why are you betraying 141? 

Why?

Jack is the only one who will look you in the eye, he likes to look you in the eyes but he’s not kind. You become numb to the attacks, the repetitiveness of the torture, you hate that word, torture, it makes you feel guilty. You’re not guilty. Or maybe you are. 

“I wouldn’t use insulin.” You say after a particularly rough session. 

“What’s that?” jack asks, his face up in yours but you can still only just make out his features, nose, lips, chin, in your blurry haze he just looks angry. 

“If I was going to kill him I wouldn’t use insulin, too easy to be traced.” He doesn't like that answer, he doesn’t like anything you say if it’s true or not. 

You enjoy Gaz’s visit’s, he’s the member of 141 you had not met yet, he brings you food, soup or rice mostly. He doesn't question you, doesn't talk to you. Just tries to feed you food, or at least swallow gulps of water that burn your throat. He doesn’t need to do this for you, you don’t know him, he makes you feel strangely guilty. You used to spit out the food not accepting anything from him, when he said they would start tube feeding you, you relented accepting the spoonful's of thick soup or rice and beans. He’s got kind eyes. 

You don’t see Simon or Johnny anymore, maybe they’ve given up on you, maybe they don’t care. Jack tells you they don’t care. Price is there sometimes you think, it’s getting harder to tell, the passage of time becoming almost impossible to follow, you think it’s been 3 days, maybe 4, maybe 5. Your stomach growls, you haven’t seen the sunlight in days. Your body hurts from being upright all the time. 

“You should give her a break.” It’s Simon’s voice that pulls you out of your half conscious state. You see him stood in the door way, all black, his face covered. It’s not the voice you know, not the kind voice you’re used to it’s something different. It makes you shiver, makes the hairs stand up on your body. You try not to cry, only letting tears fall down your face after Gaz has been, then you know you’ll be left alone for a few hours. You don’t want to let them break you but it’s becoming harder to think.    

Someone bursts bursts through the door to the room pinning Jack to the wall. The noise makes you jump and you try to lift your head up but it’s too hard, your neck hurts. You blink hearing shouting, then you feel hands on your face, it feels like Johnny’s hands they’re warm he’s forcing you to look at his face. Everything is blurry you try to squint. You feel movement behind you. 

“I’m so sorry it took us so long love.” It’s Johnny’s voice you’re sure, your head is spinning though, you can’t tell. Your eyes move past Johnny, you think you see Simon, you think that’s him, you feel your head slump in Johnny’s hand as your restraints are cut lose. You must of blacked out for a second because the next thing you know is being on the floor. Johnny scoops you up in his arms and you lean up against his chest. 

“it's over now, we've got you.” Johnny whispers in your ears. You’re blinded by lights as Johnny carries you out to the room to the medbay. You recognise the smell, that’s a good thing you’re not totally broken, you can smell the clean sheets, the smell of antiseptic. There are hands all over you now, people touching you, so many lights. You reach for Johnny, where did he go? You start to panic trying to pull yourself up. Is it a trick? Are they doing this to finally try and break you? 

“Johnny!” You call searching for his hands. You feel a sharp pain travel down your arm. You feel your breath catch in your throat, your body being pressed down. Maybe this is the end you’re in too much pain and too tired to tell. You feel your body slump down as ringing grows louder in your ears, it doesn’t take long before everything goes black. 

——————————   

Johnny wakes to Simon’s hands on his shoulders. He looks over at your body still unconscious, still with tubes shoved down your throat. Simon pulls a chair up next to him, Simon’s started caring less and less who sees them together, especially at night. 

“The doc’s say the swelling in her head’s gone down.” Johnny says leaning forward in his chair.

“When was the last time you slept?” Simon asks him. 

“Got a nice kip before you woke me.” Johnny replies. Simon sighs, his hand running up the back of Johnny’s neck. 

“You really should get some sleep, some proper sleep.” Simon says. Johnny scoffs. 

“4 days,” he says, looking back up at you. 

“4 day’s, we let her suffer.” Johnny says quieter. Simon sighs his forehead resting on Johnny. Simon know’s how guilty Johnny feels, he feels the same too, he’s just better at hiding it. 

“Come.” Simon says getting up extending his hand out for Johnny. Johnny looks up at him blinking. 

“Give me five minutes.” Simon pleads. Johnny sighs standing up and following him. He lets Simon guide him all the way to the dorms into Simon’s room. Johnny has never left the bedside since you had been moved to Damascus. Simon had tried to get some alone time with him but he can tell Johnny’s guilt weighs heavy on his shoulders, he want’s to be there when you wake.

Simon pulls Johnny into his room, locking the door. Johnny tries to protest but Simon is too quick, his hands guiding Johnny’s hips pushing him against the wall. Simon’s hand slips under the front of his mask pulling it off over his head, he looks up at Johnny his thumb stroking his cheek. Simon looks almost sad, he can see the pain in Johnny’s eyes, the anger, he feels it too.

Simon presses his lips onto Johnny, forcing his tongue in his mouth as his hands reach under his shirt. Johnny seems to relax for a second enjoying the taste of Simon on his lips, playing with his tongue. Simon pulls away moving to Johnny’s neck planting little kisses all the way down to his collar bones. His head tips back hitting the wall as Simon pulls Johnny’s shirt over his head. 

“Si, we shouldn’t leave her.” Johnny says as Simon is burying his head into Johnny's neck. 

“She’ll be fine.” Simon says his voice low, almost a groan, as he continues to run his tongue down Johnny’s neck, Johnny’s hands moving up Simon’s back eventually running his fingers through his hair. Johnny doesn’t fight Simon, enjoying the feel of his husbands hands on his body as Simon’s hands slip under Johnny’s waistband pulling his trousers and boxers down. Simon is moving slow, slow and gentle working his hands down Johnny’s stomach to his abdomen, Johnny is almost desperate gripping Simon’s hair as he moves his tongue round Johnny’s body. 

“Si..” Johnny moans as Simon’s hands find their way to Johnny’s semi-hard cock. Simon want’s to almost beg Johnny to relax, instead running his hand up and down his shaft. Johnny presses his forehead on Simon’s chest moaning as he pushes his hands slipping under Simon’s shirt. Johnny trembles as Simon uses both his hands to pleasure him, his breathing becoming faster. Simon keeps Johnny’s body pressed up against the wall as Johnny starts thrusting his hips, fucking Simon’s hands. Johnny had felt this many times before, Simon giving him pleasure, but never quite like this, his emotions high, endorphins pumping through his body, Johnny starts to tense again Simon pulls away, a whimper leaving Johnny’s lips. 

“On the bed.” Simon says guiding him over as Johnny blindly follows his instructions laying flat. Simon takes his boots and the rest of his pants off flinging them to the side. Johnny lays his head back on the pillows as Simon licks the precum off Johnny’s tip making him moan his hands desperately trying to grab Simon’s hair. Simon smiles then thrusts his mouth round his cock taking him all the way to the hilt.

The pleasure is almost overwhelming, Simon can feel it, Johnny’s body shaking a mix of pleasure and stress. Simon doesn't stop his hands running up Johnny’s chest as he positions himself in a more comfortably to suck him off. Johnny moans and gasps as Simon’s tongue presses into the underside of Johnny’s shaft, Simon can feel him twitching in his mouth enjoying each one as he get’s closer to the edge.

Simon can read Johnny’s body like a book, Johnny thinks he’s sly hiding his movements, his cheeky side glances, the heavy petting Johnny does when he’s in the mood, the way his fingers move around Simon’s body forcing his attention. He thinks he’s good at hiding it but Simon knows him, Simon loves him and right now Simon knows he needs to make Johnny relax.

Johnny’s hips are thrusting again Simon’s hands grip his waist trying to keep it in place. Johnny moans Simon’s name as he cums. Simon likes that, hearing Johnny call his name in the heat of the moment, Simon feels his own cock twitching in his pants as he rides Johnny through the orgasm making sure that Johnny is well and truly satisfied before pulling his mouth away. Simon enjoys the taste of Johnny’s cum in his mouth, the feel of his hot seed hitting the back of his throat. Johnny is still panting when Simon moves, sliding up next to him pulling his head on his chest.

Johnny moves to rest on his chest his still heartbeat still racing, Simon takes exaggerated breaths and Johnny subconsciously follows him. Simon reaches down pulling the duvet over Johnny, kissing his face running his fingers through his hair. 

“You need to rest,” Simon says wrapping his arms round Johnny stroking his back. Johnny’s breathing starts to steady as Simon lowers his voice.

“You do this on purpose,” Johnny says sleepily. Simon smiles, he does do it on purpose. Johnny needs to rest, he’s no good to anyone if he can’t think straight.  

“I’ll wake you if anything happens, I promise.” Simon says kissing his forehead.   

——————————   

The knock at the door pulls Johnny out his sleep, he jolts awake almost fighting over Simon to get out of bed. 

“Easy.” Simon says as he moves swinging his legs out so Johnny can get up.

“You said you’d wake me if anything happened.” Johnny sounds frustrated puling his trousers and shirt on. 

“This is the first thing that’s happened.” Johnny throws Simon’s mask at him opening the door before he gets chance to put it on. It’s only Price.

“She’s awake, she’s asking for you.” Price says. Johnny shoves his feet into his boots as Simon gets up off the bed moving over to the door. Johnny looks back at Simon smiling and rushes out the room pushing past Price. Simon follows Price stopping him in the doorway. 

“What do you want to tell her about Jack?” Price asks. Simon sighs. 

“Laswell found anything?” Simon asks walking with Price, he shakes his head. 

“Still looking for a connection, he’ll be punished for the way he questioned her, demoted at the very least, depends on what they feel like. Theres no evidence he spoofed her card we’re lucky there were so many witnesses. We’re lucky we could clear her name so quick.” Price says. It still took 4 days. 

“Think he can justify his actions?” Simon asks. 

“Let’s see, we’ve got other things to focus on now.” Price walks into her room Simon hangs back for a second. A wave of guilt washing over him, he just wanted to hold her jump into bed with her, apologise. 4 days we let her suffer, Johnny’s words replaying in his head. Never again, he promises himself. 

Next part

[statelysapphic]

Letters to Emily

Emily Prentiss x Reader

Summary: When Ian Doyle takes away the one person you love, you find solace in writing her letter.

Warnings: Typical talk of Emily being dead. Hurt. Let me know if I missed something<3

A/N: Hi friends! It’s been a while. I’ve been working on this for a while, and idk how I feel about it. I very lightly edited this. Feedback is appreciated as always. Ao3 Link. Enjoy!<3

July 26, 2011

Emily,

I accepted the job. I’m not sure what would piss you off more though: the fact that it’s a desk job or the fact that it’s in Phoenix and I’m leaving Quantico. Leaving the team. I know you’d tell me that I’m making a huge mistake but it’s just too painful.

JJ brings me coffee every morning, just like you did, and even though I know she means well, it’s a painful reminder that you will never bring me coffee again. When I look up from my desk in the bullpen to see the empty one across from me, I’m reminded that I won’t be able to watch you work anymore. I loved watching you pour over files, watching the gears turn in your head. Putting the pieces together and catching the bad guy. You were brilliant.

Emily paused as her vision blurred, the burning sensation of tears threatening to spill catches her attention and shifts her focus. She was angry. Angry at Doyle for forcing her into this mess. Angry at JJ for not telling her that you transferred. Angry at Hotch for even approving your transfer request. Angry at Derek, Spencer, and Penelope; Did they even try to convince you to stay? She took a deep breath, and then another. As she felt her heart rate return to normal, she wiped the tears away from her cheeks and continued reading.

Everything here is a painful reminder of you. Everything. I walk past a framed photo of you every single day and it guts me. Every single time. I can’t keep doing it, so I’m running. I know you’d be so disappointed in me. Virginia isn’t home without you, Em. It stopped feeling like home when JJ told me you “never made it off the table.” I don’t think I’ll ever find your feeling of home again.

I’m not sure how to tell the team about the transfer. Maybe I’ll buy them a round after this case and break the news to them then. Booze and karaoke should soften them up, right?

I don’t think they’re going to take it well. I just hope they skip the guilt trip.

I hate to end this on a sad note, so I will say that I think Arizona will be good for me. Lots of sunshine and wide open spaces. New people, new experiences. I actually think I’m excited, even though I feel guilty for it. I suppose that will get better with time. I don’t know if I’ve told you this, the one item on my bucket list is to go rockhounding out west. Maybe I’ll treat myself once I get settled.

I miss you so much, Em. But I love you even more. Always.

Emily refolded the letter and slid it back into its envelope. As she placed it on the coffee table in front of her, she finally allowed herself to cry. She had done everything in her power to protect you from Doyle and her past. Although you were physically safe, it was clear from your letters that the emotional toll was severe. She was only about halfway through the stack that she found in your bedside table, and she still had three months worth left to read. She knew she wouldn’t finish by the time you got home, but that was okay.

The raven haired woman sighed, picking up the next letter in the pile.

August 12, 2011

Emmy,

Fuck I miss you today. I wish you would’ve been here to ground me though that. Or kick some ass for me. The movers were nice enough to break my bed frame while bringing it up the stairs and then denied doing it. I watched him drop it, babe. I wasn’t even mad until he denied it. Don’t worry, I called the manager and received a full refund for the trouble.

I wish you were here to cuddle on this couch with me. I miss the way you’d hold me. I felt untouchable when I was in your arms. I think you’d like this new apartment though. The master bedroom has a killer view AND a balcony. It also has plenty of south facing windows for my houseplants, and room for many more. My collection has grown exponentially since you’ve seen it last. As odd as it sounds, they’ve helped me through this.

Sorry for the short letter today. Who knew moving halfway across the country would be so tiring? Could’ve fooled me. I love you, Emily. Always.

Emily chuckled lightly at your sarcasm, but soon felt the tears return.

Sadness began to fade within Emily, and anxiety soon took its place. She was unsure of how you would react when you came home after a long day at work to find your not-actually-dead partner sitting in your living room, reading your private letters, no less. Sure, they were technically addressed to her, but she knows you never thought anyone would read them. Maybe this wasn’t the best way to do this, but Emily vehemently rejected all help that the team offered. Hotch offered to call your Supervisor to have them sit you down to talk you through it. JJ nearly begged Emily to help in some capacity, already feeling immense guilt over the situation. Though, she almost let Rossi accompany her when he offered, and she was beginning to regret not doing so.

The regret faded almost instantly as Emily heard a key in the front door. Her heart rate increased and her chest became tight. The reality of the situation had settled in for Emily, and the uncertainty was paralyzing. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, a sorry attempt to calm her nerves, as she braced herself to face you. She heard the door shut, followed by footsteps that grew louder and louder until there was silence. Emily didn’t dare look up. Even as she heard the loud clatter of what she assumed were your keys colliding with the hardwood apartment floor.

“E… Emmy?”

~

[neros-very-first-fiddle]

history of panic! at the disco except I’m only a moderate fan, so it’s not 100% accurate and I had to fill in some gaps with my imagination, so you definitely shouldn’t quote me on any of this

it is currently 1 am and this is the only thing in my head, so let’s go.

have I listened to every p!atd song? yes. do I know the history? absolutely not.

so, Las Vegas, right? there’s a bunch of high school guys who are in a band and everything is going great, but uh oh, they need some back up vocals. local loser teen Brendon Urie comes to the rescue with his mediocre singing skills (he can’t sing) (at least not yet) so the band reluctantly takes him on. they play a few shows, so pretty good for a high school band, then they release an album. did they get signed to a record label first? uhhhh, I’m gonna say yes. its Vegas, they might as well have been.

so they write their first album, “a fever you can’t sweat out”, and it does well! “I write sins not tragedies” does absolutely fantastic in particular. it’s emo, it’s young, and their target audience approves.

riding off that high, they do what any other self respecting cool, hip, emo band would do and they write a psychedelic folk album. because duh. and using my knowledge that the first track states “we’re so sorry we’ve been gone”, the album took a minute to make and produce. Two years to be exact. And that’s exact exact. A whole 24 months. Released it on fever’s anniversary and everything. Also; at this point, one of the band members dropped out. probably a drummer. their name? uhh, idk, probably frank, david, or pete,,

so they write another album. it’s called “vices and virtues” and it uses a bit more tech and it’s a good sound and it goes a bit more back into their rock and roll roots. they continue with their thing of going super heavy into eccentric album themes and where all these cool steampunk outfits in the mvs and on the album cover. then ryan ross leaves. and this makes lots of people sad because he’s ryan ross. but the album’s good, so there’s some consolation. also some of the other members leave with him. the bass player dipped and their drummer flaked again. he didn’t want to go on without ryan ross’s ryan ross-ness and honestly who can blame him? also fun fact! the bass player left for completely non-ryan ross related reasons. his parrot brother passed away and it really took a toll on the family. and no I’m actually not joking because another fun fact! parrots live really long and a lot of the times in families they’re raised along with the children and they become so bonded to the family that oftentimes they’re considered an actual part of it. I found that out from a podcast when one of the hosts said her ex had a parrot for a brother which made me break down laughing, but that’s honestly really neat. anyways.

after that they, you guessed it, write another album. this one’s called “too weird to live, too rare to die”. the album cover is very cool™️ and so is the music. and they have a new bass player! his name is dallon james weekes and he is actually The coolest person ever. lots of fans are upset with the new album because it’s missing ryan ross, but dallon makes up for it. Then he leaves immediately after they finish touring for the album. boohoo.

it’s the summer of 2016. death of a bachelor has just been released. I’m at an outlet mall with my family and am standing under a giant tree trying to catch some shade from the texas heat that burns on my black hair and my brother pokes me in the arm. he’s got apple music opened up to the album Death of a Bachelor by Panic! At the Disco. he asks me if I’ve ever heard of them. I say no. he offers me an earbud and I happily take it . he presses play on a certain track; LA devotee. I’m instantly transported to another world. the sound is like nothing I’ve ever heard before. it’s not like the Spanish music my grandma always plays or christian music or 80s songs my mom sings in the car or the show tunes I sing with my friends or the classic rock my dad always blasts. it’s different. and it sounds so distinctively like me.

suddenly I’m emo. a few weeks later, I’m at a sleepover and we’re singing death of a bachelor and I mess up one (1) lyric and one of the other kids calls me a fake fan. at that exact moment in time I make the decision to religiously listen to and memorize every single lyric off the death of a bachelor album. and I did. so take that, julia. (we’re still friends)(she absolutely does not listen to panic anymore)

oh hey, would you look at that. pray for the wicked just came out. for the first time ever, I count down the days, then the minutes to an album release. it’s really fun.

and uhhh, that’s it. it’s just one guy at this point.

[jakowskis]

Day 15 - Are there any ships you dislike?

alrighty so. there are only rlly four i ‘dislike’, and the first three… it’s more complicated than anything, it’s not entirely utter pure-n-simple disdain. it’s less about the ships themselves (in two of the cases, anyway) and more about how they seem to be perceived by the fandom + how much they dominate everything. other ships exist, guys! the other characters exist! anyway ill try not to be mean but i am gonna be petty, lol

so for starters, yeah, jack x ianto. i have a very specific view of it, that i do enjoy, but the fandom seems to be doing something else entirely and i've developed some resentment despite myself. especially bc it’s overrated as fuck. don’t get me wrong, it’s iconic, as far as being culturally significant gay rep, but if im honest idk how well they hold up in 2024? i thought their relationship in s1 and s2 of the show was lackluster at best. poorly written bread crumbs. and yeah i know it was big for 2006 but im just personally kind of offended that they could show them sucking face but not show the intricacies of why the hell ianto would fall for a guy who shot his girlfriend down?? like, their relationship is inherently dark and angsty to me and im interested in exploring that, bc the show certainly doesn’t (initially) bother to, and a lot of the fan content i see is either fluffy (??????????), or angsty in a Tragique way, or is just kind of… fetishy and whumpy? people slot them into a Specific Kind of Dynamic and it grosses me tf out. so the fandom culture rubs me wrong, and then it’s just… such a bummer to like owen and tosh and gwen in a fandom that only seems to prioritize this one ship. there are 22k fics in the torchwood ao3 tag, and 13k of them are janto. now, all that being said… they do intrigue me and endear me, just a bit. but it took the audios to make me give a fuck about them, which is sad. 

on that same note - i have the same relationship with tosh x owen, but i'm significantly less fond of it, cuz it just plain rubs me wrong. i like them in theory, so i spent months trying to figure out how to make them work and what other people are seeing that they think is so endearing and cute - i just can't find it. owen's treatment of tosh is just about the only thing i can't stand about him. he treats everyone poorly, but most of the rest of the cast defends themself (or even hit back, like ianto and gwen, and thats why i ship them with him! it’s spicy! i love balanced unhealthy dynamics in fiction hfdsjkf i can’t lie) - but tosh just lets him, creating an unhealthy power imbalance where she’s just getting hurt over and over again, and it makes me wanna fucking punch him cuz she does Not deserve that. i want him far away from her lmao. except under certain circumstances, cuz i have written fic about them, and i’ve read like three rlly good ones (and the main link between them is tosh stands up for herself and puts him in his place! i HATE how he walks all over her in canon ughhhhhhhhh). additionally, i do admittedly enjoy the angst of their canon arc. i just think fandom throwing them together and making it cutesy is lazy, uncreative, and an injustice to both characters. i think the SHOW throwing them together was an injustice to both characters, especially tosh’s. they're tragic and compelling, ill give them that, but theyre not sweet, and i don't think they'd be good for each other. 

(also worth noting on a show where everyone has tension w each other, imo barrowman & gareth and naoko & burn pull it off the least convincingly and have little to no chemistry. like every other duo just kind of sparks in some way or another, and neither of those duos do. which SUCKS bc they’re the canon ones. but it’s also heavily poor writing like they were doing the best w what they had. grr. like i still dont know what the fuck ianto likes about jack or what tosh likes about owen 😭 that’s ridiculous!)

the other ship i’m petty about is jack x john hart. i just think it’s far too popular for what it is. idek why that is, do we have a substantial amount of buffy fans in the fandom? don’t get me wrong, i liked john in the show + i liked their relationship as well, but i'll always be annoyed when a minor character gets more attention than the fascinating main ones. 

and lastly i hate john x ianto, because i respect ianto, lmao. i can’t lie, if he was my fav i’d probs ship it HJFKDSHFK i love putting my favs in awful situations. but as is it just grosses me out. get him outta there!! 

tldr: i don’t interact w the john hart side of the fandom, and if a fic is tagged 'jack/ianto tosh/owen gwen/rhys' i probably won’t read it 😷

[thegoldenavenger]

[part 1 here]

Welcome to the Taylor Swiftening Part 2! Where I am listening to Taylor’s albums in release order because 1. i think it’ll be funny and 2. i want to know what my friends mean when they say like, idk “this album makes me insane but i wont turn it off”

Last time I listened to Tim McGraw, Picture to Burn, and Teardrops on my Guitar.  This time we’re starting off with A Place in this World, which also marks the start of songs i’m pretty sure i haven’t heard before!

I don’t know what to say I wasn’t expecting this opening!

It’s really interesting to hear a Taylor song not about a boy! wow! i hope there’s more. i don’t mind love songs or breakup songs, they’re great, but i really want to hear how taylor writes about other things too!

ooh love to have the weather imagery coming in! It’s actually raining right now so what a bonus. I love rain, i love rainy songs. she’s using it as a metaphor for that semi-transitional, liminal time as a kid where’s she’s able to do things by herself but hasn’t experienced much yet so she can’t tell what’s coming. also, i suppose there could be a connotation besides the actual reduced-vision rain brings by having a cinematic association with sadness?

I think in this song the rain isn’t leaning as hard on the sadness trope as it is making a journey less pleasant, since she doesn’t expand on it (rain = sadness). well, i mean the symbolism and the lyrics are a little bit lonely. rain forces isolation sometimes, even if you brave the weather, so i suppose the cinematic association isn’t too far off.

I really like this chorus, it’s simple, but listening to this now I am probably not getting the intended effect as i would have when i was like, still school aged, haha.  I do love the “I’ll be strong, I’ll be wrong, oh but life goes on” that’s really nice to include. I love the message acknowledging the mistakes everyone will make growing up and that it’s okay! especially relevant to younger folks where every mistake and social misstep feels like the end of the world.

Return of the very classic country cues with the blue jeans! Love that. I miss jeans so much... anyways

oh i like the cycle of weather! The rain has cleared up now that she has some of her comforts with her (radio and jeans, which. relatable) she has decided that being open is a good thing and the sun has come out from the clouds! i was going to go on a tangent about how jeans are really comfortable and a symbol of blah blah blah but i decided it wouldn’t be relevant but she’s honestly using the jeans and music as her comfort items. like, yeah, if the last thing we know about her is her little black dress and her old faded blue jeans from Tim McGraw, then now she’s underlining that the blue jeans are like, stability or something.

the last three songs are about breakups and unrequited love, but the jeans survive! whatever partner you have might leave you but those jeans have spent years breaking in and are ready to support you on your journey!!! i miss jeans!!! why are they so expensive now!!!!!

This last part is chorus repetition except for

“i’m just a girl on a mission” is a wild way to phrase this... what’s the mission, i thought we were on a random road to a mystery tomorrow, not targeting a specific thing? i also don’t automatically associate mission and fly as, like, mutually exclusive. in fact, my first association with missions is flying (planes to a location, or parachuting spy-style into, like, a heist IDK), but i guess having a mission is very structured as opposed to the freedom that flying usually symbolizes, which is obviously the symbolism she’s pulling from with the uh.. long.. vocalization on the word

idk anything about music guys OTL this is where i apologize for calling things the wrong name and stuff as i listen through this.

This was a cute song. I can definitely see why it wasn’t a radio-hit like the first three, it’s a little more niche and less broadly appealing? I guess. I don’t know something something about repeating “im just a girl” four hundred times (it’s only 7 times) makes me think of that tumblr think piece that’s like “naming yourself [adjective]-man is the most trans thing a person can do”.  i’m not sure if that means anything to anybody but me, but it feels like there’s an essay about gender performance in this song... even though there’s not barely any type of typically feminine-gender roles displayed here?

i really think the “i’m just a girl on a mission”, and my brain turning that to “james bond????” in the middle fried my analysis brain.

This next song is Cold as You.  Glad that we seem to be carrying on the autumn/winter rainy, cold season metaphors!! I don’t think i’ve heard a Taylor song that could be described as, like, a cozy autumn song but I think one would be nice!

okay the intro sounded super familiar to me but I just looked up Big and Rich’s Holy Water and I think it’s just because of the violin sounds. Just re listened to Whiskey Lullaby’s intro as well and that doesn’t sound the same, but has similar vibes.  is this a sad song?? like a really sad song? i know Teardrops on my Guitar was a more melancholy song but is this a tearjerker? I ask, excitedly.

oh i love this slower tempo for taylor’s voice! i mean, i like these types of songs a lot as opposed to boppier music so that’s probably because i’m biased. this first lyric, “you have a way of coming easily to me” reminds me of the lines “he’s the time taken up, but there’s never enough” and “strike a match on all my wasted time”

it’s not an exact (or even close) thematic match, but the vibes of those lyrics strike me as similar for some reason especially followed by the “you take the very best of me”

adjklsjf i misheard this as “i start a fire cause I need to feel something” and i was going “oh! oh! like picture to burn!” but it’s “fight”...

aww the last song did end on a sunny day and now it’s rainy.  that’s a neat way to tie the song order together!

i’ll be transparent here, i do not know what this means. the first line “just walk away, ain’t no use defending words that you will never say” 

i mean, trying to puzzle through it from start to finish “just walk away” is used to deescalate fights, right.  don’t say things you don’t mean, don’t say anything that could be used against you, just walk away.  but then the “ain’t no use defending words that you will never say”... “words that you will never say” in the context of this song makes me think of like, saying i love you or saying i’m sorry depending on what the fight is about.

if it was something like “just walk away and dont say something you dont mean” that’s a pretty straight forward if vague lyric but here specifically what does “no use defending words you will never say“ mean???

my first instinct is to interpret it as Taylor (or the narrator, i guess, assume i’m using Taylor as a stand in for narrator or song POV from now on) telling the other person to leave, as whatever things they would say, it wouldn’t be the right things to hear and Taylor is done retroactively trying to rationalize those words as being what she does want to hear.

i’m not sure i’m explaining it correctly, because it’s a very complicated concept to boil down into one line.... which is why im so reluctant to go with that interpretation.

i like the inflection she used here.  but this kind of reinforces my first thought of the previous lines... referring to someone as cold is usually meant to imply that person is aloof, closed off, not as warm or as expressive of emotions in general.  so i think i may be right in thinking this “you” doesn’t express enough verbally in this relationship. whether it’s specifically “i love you” or just doesn’t communicate in general, Taylor starts these fights to try and provoke some kind of reaction, but doesn’t get the desired effect (confessions of love, or opening up about whatever topic) and maybe Taylor used to rationalize this as being shy, or scared, but after enough times she can’t anymore and they can’t defend their position of not opening up.

that’s a lot for like, three lines.

wow, so this is further support. putting up walls is a metaphor for being closed-off, painting them gray is reinforcement of the previous (and to come i’m sure) chorus of “a rainy end to a perfect day”.  so yeah, this is about a failure in communication, or at least... a misalignment of needs in a relationship.

“you come away with a great little story/of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you” is a buck-wild line.  it turns the song from something lamenting this fissure of communication to a classic break-up/catharsis song. 

also, it’s kind of awkward? it goes straight into the chorus so that “nerve to adore you” doesn’t have a resolution the way “shade of gray/ all away” does... i guess it serves to make the change very noticeable.

hrm, “you never did give a damn thing” is probably supposed to be more evidence of the uh imbalance in the relationship? the second line in the song, after all, is “when you take, you take the very best of me” so it’s saying that Taylor is the one giving, giving, giving in a very unequal relationship. 

and then straight into, a BUCK WILD “you wouldn’t have told nobody if i died, died, for you, died for you” oh my GOSH that is so intense. like what is going on with that relationship that that is even on the table????

i do like that she didn’t repeat the chorus verbatim three times until the outro... the change up is nice in that it’s reinforcing her previous points, that she’s finished justifying things and presumably seeing the relationship as lopsided and acknowledging the hurt it’s given her i just.. hrm.

i like the song as a departure from the boppy tempos from before. idk, again i don’t know anything about taylor, if this is a fictional song or if she’s singing about an actual relationship, but i’ve definitely been on the other side of this where i’ve been called cold and walled off and uncommunicative, etc, when I know i was trying my best to reach out and engage in the relationship (friendship though, not romantic so maybe different expectations?) so i’m coming at this song from an extremely weird position that i know isn’t that common of one.

I like the song, and love the imagery of “never been anywhere cold as you”. i’m actually surprised i haven’t heard it before, it sounds like one of those perfect teenage angsty songs you’d use in, like, AMVs or something! but it’s not one i’ll probably listen to a lot just for, like, my mental health lol (im literally probably going to draw a lyricstuck to it hahaha)

This next song is The Outside.

It’s nice and upbeat so far...

I’ve noticed that these have all been first-person POV which is why I’ve just been using Taylor as shorthand for narrator so far. I guess that’s because I’ve heard she sings about her exes and stuff, so I just assume this is Taylor-as-POV for all the songs whether or not that’s correct..

so far this is pretty similar to A Place in this World as a song about a personal journey. That’s interesting, it’s neat to see two kind of coming-of-age songs?

oh i know this one! road less traveled by is a Robert Frost reference.

it’s an interesting metaphor considering... is it her career that is the road less traveled by? because that’s a wild claim, though i mean it fits with A Place In This World as well with the lines “don’t know what’s down this road, I’m just walking”.  That road could definitely be the road less traveled as it’s hard to see while walking on it, and as a metaphor for a career i mean i guess she couldve gone to college and gotten a degree and started working retail like the rest of us but she definitely didn’t do that so it makes a kind of sense.

and if she felt type-casted or something by her music or the way those around her perceived her i can see her feeling like she’s stumbling away from being unique and poetic

hm okay so... either the road less traveled by took her so far away from where she wanted to be that now she is... on.. the outside  or the chorus just went in a completely different direction. 

i’m having trouble relating to these lyrics because, like, DUDE.  being on the outside is just. standard.

i really do like the wording of “i’ve been a lot of lonely places/i’ve never been on the outside” though. like, yeah, it’s lonely, and it’s a different kind of experience. 

who is the you who is she looking at? is it a good thing or a bad thing. did she take the road less traveled by to NOT see the you, or did she want to get closer.

oh this isn’t like A Place in this World, I see now.

i, is? is she still talking about her career? is this an unrequited love song? i don’t know, having a song talking about loneliness, outside-looking-in, and “no one notices until it’s too late to do anything” is very specific imagery i don’t think the song is actually going for.

there was such a strong opening, and now i’m kind of unsure and unsettled. is this a song about a career, wanting someone, or suicide? i’m not sure what to think and repeating the chorus twice over to outro isn’t helping.

Despite not being able to really parse the song, i do like the connection with the previous two songs.  The beginning of this song and A Place In This World are really cohesive together. The “outside looking in” and “i would give it all up to be a part of this a part of you / and now it’s all too late” motifs are really strong coming from Cold As You, like. yeah, that probably did make her feel shut out.

also EVERYtime i hear her sing “on the outside looking in” i ONLY hear lauren lopez singing waving through a window as a vampire which is REALLY messing with my perception of this song in the most hilarious way. Cold As You and The Outside vampire POV

okay i was going to try and write up more than three songs at a time but Cold as You was a pretty dense song I’m still reeling from so I’m going to cut this here, get some breakfast, and maybe come back later and power through some more songs! i hope you’re enjoying this little excursion haha. please also take a moment to hydrate or eat if you need to! it’ll be like we’re sharing a meal together.

[chronic-ghost]

Aww that really was such a bittersweet chapter 🥺

It was so nice to see them together like this but also sad because it’s all so wrong. It should be right but it just isn’t with their situation.. with Chloe (even tho I don’t like her, she’s still Dieters partner) and the drug… I just want them to be happy 🥺🥺

Im glad Dieter didn’t immediately regret and pull away from her after the last chapter! I do still expect him to spiral eventually.. I’m also a bit sad that he relapsed but I guess relapse is a part of recovery.. hopefully eventually they can both let the drugs and addiction go and find recovery together! But tbh, you did write their drug trip beautifully!

And he loves her 😭😭😭 him saying it while high af makes me weirdly sad. And that he doesn’t remember if she says it back 😭

Pls don’t ruin him Natalie 😭

Also this moment made me 🥺 “He’s being overtly playful, the low lighting and single burning candle at the center of the table as the only nearby light source making him even more daring. But he knew he’d be admonished – it was too much in public and –“

Because you know he feels like that because of Chloe, because she admonishes him when he just wants to show off his love. And he has so much love and affection to give and I’m so glad he didn’t feel this way with Natalie 🥺

They’re perfect together and I’m so glad eventually it will end well for them. But the road to get there is gonna be rough.

I already can’t wait to read the next chapter!! I loved looooved this one! Thank you (: (also btw, i don’t know how exactly AO3 works but while the chapters are all there, the update date is still June 28? Idk if that’s on purpose or not but just wanted to tell you! Because even tho there’s a new chapter, the story doesn’t show up as just updated on AO3 so people may be missing some updates!)

Much love you you! 💕💕💕💕

Ahhhh nonnie I was waiting for your thoughts!!! 💗💗💗

I'm so sorry I didn't get to this sooner but these kind of long, thoughtful, insightful asks always honestly make me tear up a little and I never know how to respond with the appropriate amount of gushing!

As per usual, your insights are totally dead on -- they finally get what they both want, but at rather big cost to both of them. for now, natalie is a new drug for him, one he has no pre-established tolerance for.

i am SO GLAD YOU NOTICED THAT ONE BIT!!! I was really hoping someone would call it out because yes, while things are trending toward bad things, there is some fundamental connection that these two exist in space that they are their most comfortable in. There is something there, but neither one are equipped to handle it.

This was the chapter that I was probably most nervous for, just because most people are turned off by drug/dream sequences but they were all important to show a different side of their relationship.

As for the Ao3 date . . . I am hanging my head in shame. I cannot believe I haven't noticed that. The original publication date was messed up because I had saved it as a draft, but I definitely didn't realize it was 😳Thank you very much for pointing that out! Since I update on Thursdays, I'll go back and change them to the correct dates.

Thank you again for your weekly comments and fantastic character analysis and let me blather on about my favorite little blorbos 💞 See you next week!

[diabolicalacid]

this is going to be long….but i have to let this out my chest because i am going to combust just thinking about this:

if ms. self destructive is gonna end up mr. sakusa im going to screaaammm !! i don’t think it would be a wise decision if they decide to rekindle when their past barely even has a foundation. it was literally just a fling that happened in their teens, like it’s so petty!! who in their right mind would go to that extent just to have a “sloppy revenge?” also, made my blood boil when reading how she’s just shirking off her responsibilities and goes back to her “woe is me, i‘m the only one suffering in this world so all of you should have sympathy for me and be there for my every beck and call” attitude and mentality, e.g. when she went off in the gc for the first time without warning and put someone on the spot with personal details, when she doesn’t have an ounce of professionalism, passion nor dedication to her career (literally made me scream because the job market is very competitive and she’s just wasting it like she was born with a golden spoon in the mouth, hello!!), when she repeatedly never listens to her friends and blows them off, her constant mean and derogatory comments about reina (calling her a bitch and a wench…it did not ate as she wanted it, just made her pathetic honestly 🫤), and when she turned the situation around and basically told shoyo (non-verbatim) that her feelings were more important than “a bunch of games that’ll never lead up to the future/amount to anything” or something like that. the nerve of her to just say that to a person whose life revolves around volleyball!!! whose career is being an athlete!!! whose income would be determined by whether their team wins or loses!!! how dare she.

literally never hated a reader so much which is a double edged sword because i love when the roles in the story are reversed from the usual, like the character is the one hurting and the reader is the a-hole. your characterization and ability to make a character so insufferable, unlikeable, and hateable is amazing btw. i wouldn’t be surprised if kenma and kuroo leaves her in the dust. i wouldn’t be surprised when she just gets fired because behaving like that and not doing your job properly only because of your personal problems is a big no no in japan, and it will literally lessen your chances of getting rehired in another company once they do a background check on you and find out your incompetence.

the reason why im so fired up with boarding the hate train against reader is because this particular situation hits too close to home, because i know someone like this irl. well, knew, since both my friend who is involved with this particular incident, and me, cut off ties with the messy ex-friend. in this situation i was like kenma and kuroo in one. it was very emotionally exhausting and draining, and it’s really not worth it to save a friendship when you know they’re headed to crash and burn but they don’t want to change because of their singular goal. that, and having tunnel vision, only seeing what they want to see, the whole shebang. i don’t mind telling you the background story behind it, but idk if you want me to blow up and rant in your askbox though lmao.

to reader in the story, only thing i can say is: f*ck around and find out. 🥱 play stupid games, win stupid prizes 🥴

i appreciate the fact that you took your time to write this all down. like wow 😭 i’m really glad that you were able to cut ties with your messy friend and start clean. as for kuroo and kenma, they’re pretty used to yn. they shouldn’t be, but they are.

everyone will get their happy ending, but happy ending doesn’t mean yn and sakusa will end up conventionally. clearly they’re both very toxic in their own ways right now, so there’s a lot they need to work on.

and yn being rude to her friends, saying things she knows she’ll regret— that’s such an everyday thing, it’s truly sad. i hope she gets better, cuz sunshine sho didn’t deserve all that she said to him 🥹😭

[noonaishere]

i just wanted to like tell you that your jaehyun smau was literally my fuel for a couple of days. i didn’t want to like every single chapter or comment a lot ‘cause i didn’t want to spam, so hopefully this makes up for it? shows my love? and how thankful i am?? like this made me happy, this gave me inspiration to get through my day JUST to read this, legitimately had “come on do this assignment THEN you can read” going through my head. it was just, really really nice to read, and i’m happy you posted it 💜 idk maybe this is making a mountain out of an ant hill in a good way, but it genuinely made me feel happier than i already am! i hope your pillow is always cold, you grades (if you’re in school) are always up, your food always the perfect temperature, your hands and feet never cold, your days always good, and the weather always nice, have an amazing day/night 💗

Hold on, hold on, hold on, lemme just 

Do people get mad when other people comment on every chapter of their fic? I have to say - in this instance at least - that I am not people.. uh... those people. (Wait, did I just out myself as not being human or something? What?) I could not imagine seeing multiple likes or comments on something I’ve written and getting mad, my attention-starved ass is like “Yes! Please tell me how much you love it! Shower me in compliments! Like everything! Reblog it so other people see it and do the same!” and then I bashfully teehee to myself like:

(Like when you’re little and your parents hang your art on the fridge or something and you’re all proud but also a little shy from the attention lol)

Honestly, I love when people leave comments as they’re reading, because seeing people react as the story unfolds is really funny. (Like when this was uploading and people were yelling because the slow burn was too slow... babies, I did not come here to fuck around. If I promise you a slow burn I will give you a slow burn lol.)

The only bad effect that results from any compliment at the moment is that I’m like, “Omg! I want to write more!” ...but I can’t until the semester ends 😭😭😭 So right now I’m like this:

So until I can finish my new fic, I’ll be in like... CRY-ostasis (like that? lol) in which I am frozen, but not in ice, in sadness because I can’t write.

But anyway, thank you for the compliments! I read it and was like “teeheehee” kicking my legs (in my mind) because of it lol. And like... you said it helped get you through the day, isn’t that what art is for? To make our lives better or at least more bearable? I’m glad you found so much solace in it. I started writing because I wanted to read stories that I couldn’t find (I know I made a post with my AO3 on here somewhere if you want to read my old fics. Be warned: there’s a lot of smut lol), and seeing people read them for the same reason I read things is cool. We’re all just people who want stories, you know? Anyway, I need to stop philosophizing, or we’ll be here all day. Here:

And here’s a meme I made just for you:

Thank you so much 😭😭😭🖤🖤🖤

[brandnewhuman]

Imagine it’s been a few years since the reader left Michael ( he never got over them ) and maybe one day he’s stalking one of their friends and overhears them talking to the reader, he tries to get as close as possible to hear every word that they’re saying because he misses them and would do anything to get them back. They’re just chatting and stuff and then the friend asks if the reader ever got over their asshole ex boyfriend ( Michael ) and the reader says that they’re completely over him and in love with some other guy and that they’re engaged. And the reader keeps going on and on about how great this one guy is and how lucky they feel. I feel like he’d go ballistic knowing that someone else gets to experience the love he would do anything to get.

Can you imagine the heartbreak??!! Idk why but I live for making Michael suffer

Cilice

Part 2

☆STARRING☆

Michael Myers

CONTENT

Part 1

Tw: canon violence, depression, abandonment issues, obsessive behaviour, toxic relationships

A/n: some of you are about to get real mad with all this multiple part unfinished business but HEAR ME OUT OKAY? I ALWAYS END UP WRITING TOO MUCH PLUS IM NOT REALLY SURE WHAT DIRECTION I WANT THIS TO TAKE SO GIVE ME TIME OKAY? The part 1 was supposed to be a one shot but how could I say no to Michael angst? Exactly, I can't. Until I figure out how to end this, have fun reading about Michael getting obliterated

SONGS RECOMMENDATIONS:

Francis forever - mitski

Ifhy - Tyler the creator

Girl with one eye - Florence + the machine

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Seeing you after all these years was like seeing you for the first time, he felt finally alive again. He has never been the type to do 'poetic' comparisons, so if he says he felt dead you can be sure he's not exaggerating or talking figuratively. Everyday after you left it felt like being on the verge of dying but not quite enough to actually be gone, he felt every single day passing by but at the same time he felt like he was just witnessing everything from the outside. He was just…existing, his body waiting for you to come back to get out of that limbo sort of state. 

These years have been the most peaceful haddonfield has ever had, since their feared boogeyman seemed to vanish from sight. He was losing his mind, he saw glimpses of you everywhere, with the corner of his eyes. He would catch shapes of your form that disappeared as soon as he tried to look at them fully, almost like even them didn't deemed him worthy of even hallucinating about you. If he tried to eat everything tasted rancid and made him sick, if he tried to go outside the faint sound of your voice coming from everywhere would torment him enough to just not let him even breathe without feeling like he was being crushed. Even sleeping was a torture as everytime he closed his eyes he had to live again the day you left, every emotion and all the pain was burned into his brain and as soon as exhaustion hit his mind the wounds were triggered and he ended up always awaking violently and gasping for air. 

So here there was, lifeless and barely breathing as even moving just to expand his lungs with air was painful. Every day was the same and everything was slow when he wished for it to be fast and fast when he wished for it to be slow. Eventually he had to leave your house too and get back to his own old one. 

Nothing has ever been able to break Michael like this, you really were like a disease but at the same time the cure. His mind started to get lost in an ocean of thoughts, some many that he wasn't even sure if they were all his at some point. Everything was confusing, rage and sadness crushed onto each other making his head throb with pain. After a while he was just downright delusional, his own mind collapsing on itself and denying anything that could add to the trauma. 

He kept his head bowed in shame and utter defeat, whispering softly to every ghost of you around him how sorry he was and even begging to be spared from all of this, praying to God (something he has never done) to let him die already. 

When he was about to give up completely, wandering the streets like even less than a ghost, he caught sight of one of your friends. When this whole thing started he used to follow your obnoxious best friend around, trying to get as much information as possible about your whereabouts without any luck. They seemed to be as clueless of where you went as he was so he stopped following them pretty soon, he didn't even consider killing them to justify the wasted time. He just needed to focus on you, on not losing you in his head too since his hallucinations of you weren't that happy about the idea of him slaughtering your friend as an act of revenge against the pain you were causing. The pain made falter his never ending willpower and relentlessness, something no one has ever been able to do. He just completely gave up on trying to exist, to do anything that made him aware of still living a life where you were not with him anymore. 

So when he spotted your friend seemingly very enthusiastically conversing with whoever they were on call he just kind of ignored them, just focusing on his own small piece of hell. That was until he heard it, your name. He knows it wasn't just his mind making up stuff to prolong his agony, it was really you and he knows because he felt his whole core slightly tremble. They were talking with you, talking about you coming back. They were what made it worthy to stalk your friend once again, what woke up his unrelenting determination which overpowered his lack of energy. It was like being alive again and not simply breathing, everything in his body bloomed just at the mere idea of you being near. He almost couldn't restrain his own anticipation, the torturous waiting way more sweet than the grief made prison he has been living in these years. His own delusional mind telling him how obvious it was that you would eventually come back, you would never leave him like that right? You just wanted to make a point, a punishment if you will. He will be the first to admit he deserved it if that's what you wanted, he has learned and he was ready to show it to you. 

His patience never faltered as he followed your friend around until the hour to meet you finally came. He kept himself hidden in the shadows to observe you from afar, savouring each sensation. Just by looking at you, at your smile and gentle gaze, he felt whole again. He was so glad you finally came back, this time he would make sure to treat you so much better. 

Rage or hate never crossed his mind, he couldn't find it within himself to resent you now that you were so close and looked so happy. That until he actually paid attention to what you were saying

"Yeah no…i- I'm getting married soon, that's why I wanted to meet you. I wanted to tell you personally since I kind of left without any explanation" the last part of the sentence was almost a whisper as you lowered your gaze, torturing your fingers nervously while trying to suppress every memory of him. As time went by and as you got far from Michael your view about him and your infatuation changed drastically. You realise how clouded your life felt when he was in it, at first when you left his oppressive shadow you did feel lost without him. Everything was too bright and happy and you didn't know how to handle it, it took you years of patience from your current partner and hard work to disintoxicate from his love corrupting your mind. When that painful veil was removed you became the happiest and healthiest version of yourself, everything about you flourished under the kindness and care of your lover. Your memories about Michael were not ones you looked with fondness or sadness anymore, now they were things that you actively tried to forget. You would never go back to what he was making out of you. You had to admit that you still felt fairly scared of putting a single foot in haddonfield, you knew how Michael was when he set his mind on someone. At some point your partner begged you to come back so he could meet your parents parents friends ecc.. telling you that years have passed and you couldn't keep giving someone so much power. You trust them so much you didn't argued, somewhere in your mind it made sense the fact that maybe after all this years Michael might have find someone else to torture. Besides, you owe your loved ones an explanation. You couldn't keep running away from your old life and just ignore everything and everyone in your old life, you naively wanted to hope that maybe everything would work in your favour for the second time. 

"Wait, you're engaged?? I thought you and that psycho broke up" your friend questioned, stopping suddenly from walking to look at you. "Nono it's not him! Oh god no, it makes me sick just to think about it" you laugh it off, explaining everything to them and generally catching up with your best friend. 

It makes me sick…the sentence just kept bouncing back and forth inside Michael's mind. He had to steady himself against the wall he was hiding behind cause his legs suddenly started to give up. Clutching his chest as he felt like everything inside him was on fire with brutal pain, he felt the ground beneath his feet disappear. You and your friend were long gone now and all Michael could see and hear was a crowd made of visions of you mocking him and chanting all together the same sentence over and over. After all these years of being basically mentally annihilated he was sure there was nothing more for the pain to crush, but he was wrong. He couldn't really tell what was worse, if feeling like the ghost of a ghost or being so alive and aware of everything going on. How could you possibly do this? You who were the one crying for his love, who swore to the gods you would never see him as everyone else has always done. How come that you're this happy and full of life and he's the one who has been imprisoned in his own pain? No, this couldn't be right. He couldn't even cry, he felt so empty but full of bottled up emotions at the same time that he couldn't manage to bring out the tears. Now more than ever he was glad to have his mask cause he didn't want to live this as himself, that would mean that all those things you said and all the damage he has suffered was fair. If he kept on the mask all of this was still the boogeyman's fault, not Michael's, he could still make up for it. 

Without even realising he was sitting on the ground, his mind demanding of him too many different things at the same time. He just wanted some time with you, just enough time to make it right and get back to how things were. They couldn't just take you away from him, he couldn't even consider letting you go, he loves you so much that it feels just really unfair. No he couldn't allow it, not at least without making it right, you would certainly listen to him once he showed how much he has truly changed. 

[helpwhatsthis]

For your most recent post right this is kinda like a general fucked up type if shit so stay with me here. So basically 001 the reader and Eddie were all “working” for Dr.Brenner right and they’re like secretly dating each other type of shit like that. But like that we’re it gets fucked up cuz then mf 11 comes around n shit so that’s where it Lowkey fucks everything up. But then maybe MAYBE later on when 001/Vecna comes back he puts Reader and Eddie under his “spell” and they reconnect. 🤷🏾‍♂️ idk what I just wrote but yea.💀

remember- e.m. / 001

the post being referred to is this one!

thank you sm for the idea, love! i'm thinking of writing one where reader has powers, and they see their childhood friend (from before the lab) in their mind and it's eddie. so henry... kidnaps him for her, bc he wants to see his baby happy.

warnings: angst, vecna, eddie is a lil stupid, lots of blood, lots of death, deep descriptions of pain, it’s fucked, okay? very short but open for part two!

also for the fics sake, vecna is like twenty during the events of s4

you can't think. all you know is that the halls are too dark to see, and your skull is pounding. the hall, that of which are hawkins' lab, a place you hadn't set your eyes on in two years.

"y/n!" you hear it, the distinct sounds of eddies' cries. "y/n! henry! please!" his pained voice echos through the hall. your movement speed up, bringing you through the familiar path that leads to the janitors' closet. you pass bodies, and blood, so much blood. it doesn't faze you though; you've seen it all before, and you keep seeing it more every time you dare to sleep.

"baby-" you whine, finally seeing his trembling form on the cold linoleum floor. you don't have to look hard to know he's bleeding, both from his eyes and his nose. you wish you could forget the odd angle is arm is twisted at. you pull him into your lap, attempting to shush his pained cries.

"i don't wanna die." he sobs, and the words echo in your mind. you'd never be able to get them out of your head, not as long as you live.

"you won't, little one." the deep, grating voice comes from behind you. the soft pricks of claws nip at your scalp.

"who are you?" you whimper, "why do you keep showing me this?" you cry, pulling eddie into your chest. this thing, this grotesque and vile being kneels before you; it adorns a sad smile as is brushes the blood from eddies' face.

"because i want you to remember, my love." it growls, "i need you to remember the night she took you both from me." before you can process the words, its' claws dig into your skull. the pain is agonizing, searing. you can feel every twitch of its' fingers, burning your brain and melting your mind.

"henry!" you scream, sitting up in bed and choking on your sob. your head is still throbbing, making your vision blurry; but you're home. you're in bed, and eddie is beside you. he pulls you into his arms, cooing at your whimpers and whipping the blood from under your nose.

"it's okay, baby. you're okay, i'm here." eddie whispers, picking your body up with surprising ease and carrying you to the kitchen. he places you on the cabinet and begins to fill a glass with water from the tap. "was it... that night? again?" he asks, shuffling on his sock clad feet as he brings the cup to your lips.

images flash in your mind as you drink. the soft touches, the lingering of lips on lips; and then the blood, the way it all fades as eddie spasms on the floor and begs to live.

"it's him." you whisper, eyes finding his. "i don't know... how? or how i know? but it's him." he doesn't speak, just gazes at you tentively. "please... please eds? just say that you believe me?" you beg.

you don't know how much longer you can take this. how much longer can you withstand the headaches, the nosebleeds, knowing that the disfigured creature that haunts your nightmares is the person you loved. most of all; the way eddie seems to think you're losing your mind.

it's been over a year since you stopped going to therapy. you thought you'd accepted it; accepted that the girl, the child, had killed henry and your mother, and nearly killed eddie too. things had been... okay, after the incident. that man, brenner, had taken pity on wayne; had given him a document to sign, given eddie all the medical care he needed (free of charge), and gotten you therapy to deal with it all. to deal with losing your mother, who'd been a doctor at the lab since you were a child. to deal with losing henry, who you and eddie had fallen for all too quickly.

it was inevitable really, the three of you. your mother and wayne had been close friends through his maintenance job at the lab. you'd all been so young and had so much free time before the other children had arrived. it was nearly impossible to pin-point when the twisted form of playground, puppy love between the three of you turned into the real thing.

"babydoll," he hums, hands cupping your jaw. "he's dead." his voice cracks. "i want to believe you. you know that i do, but honey... whatever she did to him... there wasn't even a body left." you cry out at his words, and he lets you hide your face in his chest.

"if you could see, what i see. you would know." you whisper into his hellfire shirt, his own way of coping he'd picked up.

"he will, darling." the deep voice growls, making you sob into eddies' chest harder. "he'll understand soon enough." the dark groan turns into the soft, loving one you know so well. "you'll see, little one." henry hums. the fingers combing through your hair are still sharp, nearly breaking your skin. "i just need a little more time."

just a little more time, you'll both see.

[jikookpancakes]

JIKOOK FIC RECS that no one asked for (2021)

but im giving anyway because THE TALENT IN THIS FANDOM IS INSANE

long post incoming!! this is probably just part 1 because i wont stop reading anytime soon so i’m inserting that link just in case i do make another one in the future

What’s a Soul Really Worth, Anyway? by thisneedsmorefilth - 130k words, fantasy, demon!jm, witch!jk, listen, this and the next one are my top 2 jikook fics of all time, so well-written, plot so exciting legit reads like a book, better than a lot of books tbh, the world-building is INSANE, jungkook and the gang accidentally summon demon!jimin and chaos ensue, especially for jungkook...and you know why!!!, so funny, angsty, cried so much, happy ending but listen to me: you gotta read the sequel too, YOU GOTTA.

Militat Omnis Amans: The Beginnings by edaen - 92k words, fantasy, werewolf!jk, vampire!jm, forbidden love, super slow burn but super worth it, JIKOOK IN THIS IS MY FAVORITE JIKOOK IN ANY FIC EVER EVER EVER, this is the ultimate all or nothing will freeze hell over for the other kind of love, and the way this is written is just so... how do i describe it. like you can just tell the author wanted to be very realistic with their feelings. you’ve seen the word count, this is SLOW burn. like you will legit feel their struggle to just be able to love each other and while it hurts, it’s also SO GLORIOUS. i love this one so much and if you like reading angst with happy ending but like cranked up to 200% then read this. bonus feels if you read the whole series

Until Dawn (series) by edaen - this is the long series where the previous one above is part of. highly rec if you love fantasy and you wanna read about bts being a rag tag group of supernatural beings fighting evil yay. also it makes the above fic more satisfying because you see more of jikook just being tgt and in love (with bonus angst because of course)

7 Signs by NamHyora - 27k words, secret spies au, abo, alpha!jk, omega!jm who is always used as a raven in their operations aka they use jimin and his attractive self to attract people and gather information or acquire targets and all that spy stuff, and his bestie alpha jk is not too happy about it hehe, friends to lovers, iove this one so much i wish it was longer but i think the author is planning to write a sequel!

Drop Like Confetti by annie_vi - 110k words, ceo!jk, age difference, age swap, ahhh i love this fic so much cause jimin smart and mature and has this no bs attitude, and he can keep up with jk despite the age gap and the difference in status/experiences, jk sexy dilf in this one eheh, i love it cause the drama/angst tackles a very real concern for such couples, like there’s no angst just for the sake of having angst, it really makes sense where they’re both coming from, they’re so whipped for eo too so love that for me

Fold it Up Like Origami by annie_vi - 99k words, gamer!jk, model!jm, same author as above and jk is so boyfriend goals in this one and in all this author’s fics in general like wow my standards are so high now i will legit be single forever just reading jikook fics (with no regrets), secret relationship due to their celeb status, well-written as usual, dialogues/banter in this author’s fics are just YES

The Tournament by kinkmins - 34k words, prince!jm, bodyguard!jk, abo, i’ll paste part of the summary here “Prince Jimin gets ready to hold a tournament where 50 alphas compete for a chance to court him, his father the king hires a new bodyguard who is a little too blunt and a little too talkative.“, i really love this oneeeee

Screwed Up and Brilliant by annie_vi - 113k words, escort!jk, jimin needed a date for a work event and in comes jungkook, escort extraordinaire with a no sex rule and jimin is just dasdkjfhasl, a lot of that “is this real or is he just acting” kinda angst, fluff smut angst

Like Everything Glows by annie_vi - 180k words, merman!jm, aquatic vet!jk, ok this is like my 4th rec from this author just read all their fics you’re welcome, this is their first fantasy fic but soso good, i rec’d this to someone who doesn’t really read fics and she really loved it and said “their love is so pure hhh”, she’s right

Track one: I love you by honeydice - 30k words, they’re “just” best friends, lots of pining it hurts, there’s some yoonmin and mentioned past jinmin in this so just noting in case, angst, denial of feelings, siiiiigh

InYou by edaen - 4k words, pwp :), abo, the morning after jikook mating, more sexytimes ensue + fluff

Falling For You Again by Rose_gold715 - 30k words, amnesia au, jk forgets about jimin and idk just something about this hits right in the feels. btw i don’t support the jk hated jm before in real life agenda so i don’t like this fic for that reason but i like this fic because i love me some good painful angst with happy ending.

The President’s Son by AmeliaBedelia - 55k words, bodyguard!jk, president’s son!jm, jk is assigned to shadow jm bc his life is under threat, and things develop :), jm is jk’s gay awakening :) :)

A Touch of Sin by pettey - 102k words, fantasy au, police officer!jk, supernatural!jm, shamanism, LOOK AT THE RANGE OF JIKOOK WRITERS YALL, this is such an interesting concept, so different from every other fic i’ve read, really well-written, sometimes you come across fics and you cant help but go “someone out there rly blessing me with this art for free”

Tears to the Tide by haromame - 65k words, abo, alpha!jk, omega!jm, honestly there’s not a lot of abo elements it’s focused more on jungkook having ptsd as he just came from war, established relationship jikook, he comes back home to jimin and things have just... changed. except their love ok THEY LOVE EO SO MUCH this made me cry so f much ugh so good tho.

Zero Hour by edaen - 5k words, canon compliant, a little drabble based around rosebowl jikook, it’s part of a series/collection of canon compliant jikook so if you’re looking for more canon compliant here you go!!, also if you can’t tell already i tend to like several things from a single author, i haven’t read their other fics im legit saving for sad days but i am confident enough to say their other fics are also rec-worthy.

Wonder by wordcouture - 7k words, im sorry in advance, mcd :( pls take care of yourself, i don’t like sad endings ok i don’t, but this is so popular and i was like, ok let’s see what the hype is all about, i get it now, :((((((((((((((((((((, well-written tho, bc the author will manage to crush your heart in just 7k words ha ha

The Omega Revolution by PinkBTS  - 158k words, abo, alpha!jk omega!jm, dystopian au, the hunger games more specifically mockingjay vibes, angst with happy ending but there’s some...things... lost along the way and i think that’s realistic for a dystopian war au, well-written

Blind Switch - 226k words, jockey!jk, rich spoiled brat!jm, jm gets exiled to his grandparents ranch where he meets jk yeehaw, im sorry for the yeehaw, anyway fluff smut angst enemies friends to lovers hurt/comfort slow burn happy ending, all the good stuff, ugh jk so boyfriend goals, also the amount of fluff in the later chapters thank u writer

Finally by Rose_gold715 - 12k words, abo, alpha!jk, omega!jm, angst with happy ending, jikook mate out of convenience and jimin runs away from jk and his pack feeling unloved and outcasted, but jungkook goes after him :((

Park Jimin’s Guide to Good Housekeeping by Ashlyn17 - 235k words, fantasy au, when i say jikook has the best fic writers i mean jikook has the best fic writers because THE WORLD-BUILDING in this one?, THE PLOT TWIST?, yesyesyes, jungkook is a powerful fae and jimin is assigned to be his housekeeper hehe, listen my entire fic rec has several that could be great netflix shows and this is definitely one of them

A Spell That Reminds Me of Your Name by Chimneycricket - 42k words, wizards!au, enemies to friends to lovers and the development felt natural, well-written plus the author sometimes makes art of their fics and other jikook fics and posts on twitter, both their fics and art are so good, i’ve heard good stuff about their other fics too :)

that’s it for now!

just a quick one about my preferences: idc about tops/bottoms, i read just about anything but i prefer fantasy and multi-chaptered fics, i love established relationship jikook so hmu with recs anytime, i don’t like reading anything with cheating and mcd, i love fics where jk and jm are just so friggin in love they are just IT for eo, and at the end of the day even if there are elements to the fics i wouldn’t normally read, as long as they’re well-written then i’m all for it

[slytherinwh0re]

Dreams

Draco Malfoy x Female Reader

Warning: SMUT (18+ minors dni) and swearing

Summary: Where Draco has a sex dream about his best friend. (I’m such a sucker for friends to lovers).

Masterlist

A/N: I tried a different writing style so it might be a lil funky, idk, lmk.

(Y/n)’s small hand travelled lower, skimming over the happy trail that leads to his trousers. Her lips brushed his neck making goosebumps rise across his pale skin, every touch from her would send a shock of electricity through his veins. She was an addiction, and Draco had no desire to overcome it.

The sounds she made would play in his head forever, he was sure of it. Their hands were everywhere, needing to touch each other’s skin; their clothes long forgotten on the floor by his bed.

“Ready love?” Draco hovered over her, so close to connecting them in the way he always wanted.

“Wake up dumb ass.” Fucking Theo.

He groaned to himself, embarrassed that he’d had yet another explicit dream about his childhood friend. He wondered what she’d think if she ever found out, in his head every scenario ended in heart break.

***

Draco had successfully avoided her all week, every attempt she’d made to hangout he’d shut her down with some bullshit excuse but he should’ve known (y/n) would do something about it. That’s how the blonde found himself limb locked and being levitated to her dorm. He was pissed but so was she, and fuck did she look sexy.

“Why’re you acting so weird Draco?” She asked after lifting the spell. It’s true, he had been acting strange but how could he not? Every time he looked at his the witch he’d think back to the dreams he’d been having. A hard dick is the last thing he needs right now, especially in a room alone with her.

“I’m not acting weird.” He wasn’t surprised when she rolled her eyes, an unimpressed look on her pretty face.

“Yes you are, and you’ve been avoiding me. Did I do something wrong?” He hated himself for turning into such a sappy fucking git over her but that sad pout cuts straight through him. Immediately he’s pulling her into his chest, arms wrapping around her body.

“Of course you didn’t, I’ve just been having these dreams and I don’t know how to feel about them.” He was practically squirming but he knew he had to explain himself to the girl or she’d think it was her fault he was being so odd. Who would’ve thought Draco Malfoy would feel the need to explain himself to anyone, then again (y/n) wasn’t just anyone to him.

“Well why wouldn’t you just say that? I’ve been running around all week trying to hangout with you and you’ve barely spoken two words to me.” He doesn’t answer, instead he gives her an apologetic look that has her eyes rolling yet again. “Go on then, what’re the dreams you’re having about?”

The slytherin can’t look her in the eye, the thought of telling her makes him cringe but maybe talking about it will make them stop. “They’re actually about you.”

“About me? What about me?” She pauses, a shocked look adorning her face, “are they like-” she waved her finger between the both of them, signaling to what she thinks it is and he nods, knowing she’s already understood. “Oh- OH.”

“(Y/n), if this changes everything I completely understand but I need you to know I can’t help it, that’s why I’ve been avoiding you.” The witch was silent, she just stared at him and he was sure he’d lost her forever.

That’s why he was so stunned when she started making her way over to him, not stopping until their bodies were an inch away from each other’s. Her hands went around his neck and started playing with the hair there, Draco leaned into her, deciding that if this is what he could get he’d take it.

“Tell me what I did in your dreams Draco.” He about lost it when (y/n)’s lips brushed across his neck, her nimble finger still tugging at his hair.

“This. You’d do this.” She hummed against his skin, acknowledging that she’d heard him. Her hands moved down his chest and over his stomach until she reached the hem of his shirt. The girl looked up at him, silently telling him to take it off.

Draco immediately yanked it over his head, only to realize in that second she’d taken hers off as well, now her hand was reaching behind her back, undoing her bra. Every inch of her skin that’s revealed to him chipped away at his self control but he wanted to see how far she’d take this.

Her bra fell to the floor, her nipples were peaked and begging to be played with but before he could move, she was pressed against his chest. Skin on skin, and she’s kissing him.

The boy felt as if he were on fire, his hand pressed against her lower back, pushing her further into him, deepening the kiss. They moved in sync, their tongues tangled together and hands touching bare skin.

“Did we do that in your dreams?” She pulled away, her lips a bit swollen.

“Yes.” Her smile was contagious, he was sure she’d stop there and he was more than happy to but (y/n) was never one to do what was expected. Instead, she started unbuttoning his trousers and kissing her way down his chest until she was on her knees in front of him.

He was speechless, the sight of the topless girl on her knees for him was enough for Draco to die happy. She had her eyes fixed on him when she got his pants down, already rubbing him over his briefs. With one last smirk she was pulling them down.

“And this? Did I do this to you?” His dick was already leaking with precum when she wrapped her lips around him.

“Fuck yes.” Her hand moved in rythm with her mouth, flicking her wrist every time. The combination had him throwing his head back but he lowered it quickly, not wanting to miss a second of his dick in her mouth. Draco grabbed her hair, needing something to hold onto, the small moan she let out vibrated through him.

(Y/n) watched him through her eyelashes, the pleasure etched on his face had her rubbing her thighs together, desperate for any sort of friction. The girl was usually bold but even this was a little far stretched, even for her. She knew that if she hadn’t taken this opportunity to see where things would lead she’d regret it and damn is she happy she did.

The control she had over him in this moment is empowering, to watch Draco Malfoy fall apart because of her is beyond erotic. She hollowed her cheeks, running her tongue up the base with every bob of her head.

She let him out her mouth with a pop, stood back up, and dropped her skirt and panties.

“Let me show you what I do to you in my dreams (y/n).” Draco’s voice was raspy, the desire he felt for her made his mind cloudy.

“Show me.” That’s all it took for them to find her bed, lips locked, and his fingers sliding in and out of her sopping cunt. Her walls clenched his fingers deliciously, his thumb rubbed at her clit in a way that made her chest arch into him. The blonde brings his fingers to his lips, needing to get a taste. One day he’d devour her but for tonight just a taste would do.

“Ready love?” He lines himself up at her entrance, the anticipation for this moment was well worth the wait. To see his girl naked underneath him is an image that’d be burned into his mind forever.

“I’ve always been ready for this.” She kissed at his neck, pulling away to watch as he sank himself into her. They both let out an airy moan, her hands were back in his hair, and his were roaming every inch of her body.

Draco hitched her legs onto his shoulders, his hips setting a fast pace, her moans filling the room. The witch gripped him like a vice, her nails ran down his chest, leaving scratches that would be left as a reminder of this night for the next few days.

Her tits bounced with every deep thrust, (y/n) could feel herself getting close but she wasn’t quite ready for it to be over. Instead she lowered her legs and flipped them over, the new position had her screaming his name.

“Oh, Draco!” She bounced on him faster, eyes never leaving his fascinated ones. He looked at her as is she was the most beautiful girl in the world and in his eyes she is.

Her body was on fire, every time the pretty girl sank down on his cock she felt herself get closer to the edge. The blonde felt her walls begin to flutter, his hands that were situated on her breasts moved so one was toying with her clit and the other was wrapped around her throat.

The combination of her riding him and his hands on her was too much for (y/n), with his encouragement she found herself clenching around him as they came together. Their names leaving each other’s lips as their hips jerked and their vision went white.

“That was better than any dream.” He told her as they caught their breath.

*

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[cryingoverafictionalcharacter]

Pinky Promise

Summary: Fred and Y/N have been rivals for a while, but no matter if it was pranks, or quidditch or something else, they always had their limits to not hurt the other. In fact, for the past few months Y/N and Fred have been growing closer, and even developing feelings for each other, but everything changes when one of Fred's pranks go to far, and he needs to find a way to fix it to save their relationship.

Warnings: Swearing, Fred being kind of a dick, Reader getting angry, confrontation, some angst, kind of a lot of angst actually, ends in major fluff though, also humor because I may not not how to spell but I’m hilarious.

Word count: 2.7K

A/N: comin at cha with ANOTHER ENEMIES TO LOVERS FRED WEALSEY FIC??? Why am I so uncreative? Idk, anyways I hope you enjoy!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You were beyond furious. You didn’t think there was a strong enough word to describe how angry you were, and you were pretty sure if you were any angrier steam would be coming out of your ears. And the reason for all this anger you may ask?

Fred Fucking Weasley

You stormed through the hallway, heading straight to the dining hall. It was late, and you barely anybody would be in there, but you knew he would be. 

You stopped in the doorway, scanning over the tables until your eyes landed on a familiar mop of red hair. Locking your eyes on your target, you stomped over, clutching your bag tightly in your right hand.

“Oh shit- what did you do this time?” You heard Lee whisper to Fred, as you got closer, but you paid him no mind, eyes locking with Fred’s, who had that same stupid smirk that he always did. It made your blood boil.

“Good evening love, how’s your night going?” Fred asked nonchalantly, as if you were friends and not life long enemies.

“I have to say, it was going quite well, until I found this” You seethed, slamming your bag onto the table in front of him. “Say, does this bag look familiar to you?”

“Nope, can’t say it does” Fred shrugged, but the glimmer in his eye said differently.

“Really? Why don’t you take a closer look” You insisted, grabbing the bag off the table, flipping open the top, and flipping it upside-down, causing an eruption of water to fall from the mouth of the bag.

The water continued for what felt like forever, pieces of paper and pens falling out with it as the contents emptied out onto the floor, soaking yours and Fred’s shoes, but neither of you made a move.

After the water had finally stopped, you threw the bag into his lap, causing him to look down at it, a thoughtful hand on his chin.

“You know, now that I’m looking more closely at it, it does look a bit familiar” He said simply, and judging by the nervous looks on George, and Lee’s face when they saw you, you for sure had steam coming out of your ears now, but you kept your composure.

“Oh, well that’s good. You see, I’m trying to solve a bit of a mystery of who could have done this. Would you have any ideas?” You asked, crossing your arms in front of you.

By now, most of the cafeteria had cleared out. They have seen you and Fred get into heated arguments before. But this was different.

This was going to be fatal.

“No clue, but I have to say whoever thought of it is a bloody genius” He complimented, giving you a grin.

“Genius you say? So you think, flooding my one bag, and ruining all my homework, as well as my ten page essay that I’ve been working on all month, that’s due tomorrow... is Genius?” You asked, the calmness in your voice adding a coldness to the room that shot straight to everyone's bones.

And judging by the now terrified face Fred wore, he was feeling the effects of your voice as well.

“Oh, I see there's been a mix up, I’m actually George-”

“You are fucking not! Don't get me caught up in this” George interrupted, standing along with Lee to flee the scene 

“So sorry about him, Y/N, he can’t be helped. Try not to go to hard on him-” Lee started, but a quick glance his way shut him up instantly “Actually on second thought, do what you see fit, see ya Fred”

With that, George and Lee practically sprinted out of the dining hall, leaving you standing over Fred, who suddenly felt very small.

“I swear, I had no idea your essay was in there, if I had known I wouldn’t have-” Fred started apologizing, but was quickly cut off when your hand slammed down on the table beside you.

“You see Fred” You said, taking a seat on the bench next to him. “I think you did know. We’re in the same class, you’ve seen me working my ass off trying to get this essay done, and you’ve even asked for my notes, which I refused because of this kind of shit you pull” 

Fred swallowed thickly, his heart beating out of his chest at your anger. He had seen you angry before, and he’s been cross with you a few times as well, but those died down fairly quickly, and most of the time there weren't to many hard feelings. And you were right, he had seen you working on that essay, both in class, and at two in the morning in the library.

“Now” You continued “We’ve had out little quarrels in the past, you prank me, I prank you, you hit me with a quaffle at quidditch, I hit one back at you, nothing too serious. But this” She paused, picking a sopping wet pile of papers off the floor, and plopping it in front of him “Is really really fucking low. Did you know, I was already failing this class?”

The question put Fred on the spot, and he felt his heart sink to his stomach. He had always known you to be extremely smart and quick minded, so to hear you weren't doing so well in that class came as a surprise.

“Yeah, I’m failing because, fun fact, I’m fucking exhausted. I’m staying up till three in the morning every night, trying to get caught up in classes. I’m writing back and forward to my family constantly because they’re going through financial problems again, Umbridge is constantly writing me up for no reason, and on top of all of that, I still need to be worried about this” 

Your voice was beginning to shake a bit, and you both knew you were about to cry, but you were determined to keep the tears in until you were done. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction.

“So... Fred, consider this little rival, or fight, or whatever the fuck this is, over. I’m done, you win, just please, for the love of fuck, leave me alone” 

With that, you stood up and left the dining hall, quickly wiping the stay tear that snuck out on your way. All the while, Fred sat in shocked silence. He had always seen your little back and forwards as friendly competition, and had even thought they were a bit flirty at times. In fact, you two had been getting a bit closer these last few months, and had even started hanging out as friends. But now, he had royally fucked that up, and he needed to fix it.

The next day, you were exhausted. You had spent a lot of the night crying, which you hated but all the pent up emotions just came flooding out. Yes, you were absolutely pissed at Fred, but most of all, you were hurt. In the last few months, you’re arguments had died down a bit, and you found yourselves hanging out from time to time, always accidentally, but you enjoyed his company none the less.

You had even begun to like him a bit, maybe even more than a friend. He was nice, and charming, and wicked funny, and always tried to make you smile, but now, after seeing how careless, and almost mean he had been, you knew you needed to shove those feelings down. So you did. 

Your first class was potions, which of course you had with Fred. He sat behind you, and for a while, he made the class bearable, passing notes back and forward. But now you were absolutely dreading it.

Fred was sat in his usual seat, waiting for you to walk in. He had come in early, hoping to get the chance to talk to you, but when you walked in just as class began, he knew he would need to try a different approach.

Not even five minutes into the class, you felt a piece of paper land beside your elbow on your desk. You looked down, finding a folded up piece of paper, which you immediately knew was Fred's.

You could feel his eyes burning holes in the back of your head, but instead of turning around, you simply flicked the paper off your desk, returning your gaze to the chalkboard. A few minutes later, another piece of paper, this time on top of your notebook. Again, you flicked it off. 

Finally, five pieces of paper later, you smacked your quill down and picked up the newest piece of paper from your desk, unfolding it and looking it over, Fred watching you closely as you did

Can we please talk? I’m sorry

You finally turned around to meet the boys gaze, his eyes instantly lighting up at the change, but his spirits quickly fell when he saw your face, not angry, or frustrated, but sad.

You had had enough, facing the boy, you placed the paper back onto his own desk right as the professor dismissed the class, quickly slipping out of the room before Fred could follow you.

You avoided him like the plague the rest of the day. You didn’t have many other classes with him, and the ones you did share you made sure to find an empty seat far away from him, you even skipped lunch, choosing instead to read in your next class. 

You even skipped the class where your essay was due, not wanting to show up and hand over nothing, you decided to spend the rest of the day alone, and try to redo your assignment, even if you now only had a day to do it.

Fred only saw you again after class by the forbidden forest. He had found you pretty easily, you weren’t in any of your usual spots, so he knew this would be the next best spot to check. As he approached you, he found you had changed out of your uniform and were now in some joggers and a sweatshirt, sitting with your back against a rock as you scribbled in the notebook in front of you.

You chewed your lip as you tried to rewrite your essay, looking to your textbook and back every few second, before messing up on a word. Frustrated, you scribbled out the paragraph you had been working on and threw your notebook and quill to the side, resting your elbows on your knees as you held your head in your hands.

You quickly snapped out of it though when someone behind you cleared their throat, getting your attention and making you jump out of your skin. Panic surged through you, expecting a teacher, or worse, Umbridge, but the fear was soon replaced by irritation when you made eye contact with none other than the very red head you had spent all day trying to avoid.

“What do you want Fred?” You asked, turning back to face the forbidden forest, away from him. 

He didn’t answer, instead you were met with the sound of grass shuffling beneath his feet as he got closer, taking a seat before holding something out to you, causing you to look over at him.

It was your bag from yesterday, but now completely fixed and dry. It looked like brand new. 

You took the bag from him and looked it over, going over the seams and the straps before finally opening it, finding your notebooks, pens, and homework assignments all neatly tucked inside.

“How did you- When did-” you rambled trying to find the words and you shuffled through your belongings, finding them all intact and dry before finally turning to look at him “Why did you do this for me?”

Fred wasn’t expecting that question, but he still answered, looking down at the grass.

“I felt really bad after yesterday, and not just because of that stuff you... anyway, I know I went too far, and I shouldn't have done it in the first place, but I wanted to have a reason to talk to you I guess, and I did it in the worst way possible, and I wanted to make it up to you. I’m sorry”

You looked at him, before turning back to the bag, noticing there was something missing, but before you could say anything Fred continued.

“I was also able to save your essay, it took a while but it was all there. I was going to give it to you in class, but you didn’t show up so I turned it in for you and said you were sick. I got to read some of it by the way, its really good and I would be surprised if you-”

Fred was cut off by you moving your bag to the side and turning to face him, wrapping your arms around him to pull him into a hug. 

Fred was too shocked to move for a second, but quickly found himself returning the embrace, wrapping his arms around your waist and hugging you closer. You sat like that for a minute, your face buried in his neck as a thousand emotions flooded over you. Finally, you pulled away, looking him in the eye.

“I’m not saying I’m not entirely grateful” you started “But you could have just come and talked to me, why did you feel you needed to do that to talk to me?”

At this, Fred’s face began to heat up a bit and he looked back down, fiddling with the grass. He was hoping to fix your friendship and move on, maybe one day growing to be something more, but now he was faced with the choice to tell you his feelings, or lie, and he didn’t want to deny it anymore.

“We’ve always had our little competitions and stuff, ever since we were kids, and for a while we really hated each other. But then, these last few months I got to know you a lot more, and I always knew you were funny, but you’ve got a wicked sense of humor, and you’re super smart, and are always helping people, and you’re always kind to everyone you meet, and I thought I might have had a crush or something. And I didn’t really know how to interact with you in a not competition way, and I didn’t want to freak you out, but after the bag, seeing how it hurt you, it broke me. And I realized that I liked you a lot more than I thought I did”

Fred looked up at you, waiting for your reaction. Were you angry, upset, happy? Your face wasn’t giving him any signs, but then, a small smile crept to your lips, and despite how hard you tried to fight it.

You laughed.

“I’m sorry” You started, trying to fight the laughter bubbling in your chest “I’m not laughing at you, I’m not, it’s just-” Another laugh. “God were just a bunch of idiots aren't we?”

Fred was looking at you like you’d gone crazy

“What do you mean?”

“I like you too dumb ass” You confessed.

“You... oh... Oh!” Fred exclaimed, finally putting the pieces together. “Wow, I really fucked up didn’t I”

“Oh for sure” you nodded, causing Fred to let out a groan, shaking his head before looking back to you, a smile on his face.

Without thinking, you leaned forward, closing the rest of the space between you and pressing your lips to his. Fred returned the action, bringing a hand to the back of your neck to pull you in closer, deepening the kiss.

After a few seconds, you both pulled away, each with goofy smiles on your faces.

“Does this mean I’m forgiven?” Fred asked.

“Only if you promise to never do it again” you said

“Deal” Fred answered quickly, holding out his pinky to you, which you wrapped your own pinky around, shaking on the agreement.

“Wow a pinky promise, that's some hard core shit” You joked in a serious tone.

“Hey, if it means I get to spend more time with you, I’d pinky promise to anything” Fred replied, to which you gave him a feigned shocked expression.

“Anything?! Aww, you like me like me” you teased, laughing as Fred playfully pushed your shoulder.

“Shut up you like me like me too” Fred argued

“That is true” you nodded, before smiling and grabbing the front of his shirt, pulling him into another kiss, smiling as he pulled you even closer.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: Heeey, so I was hit with the biggest surge of motivation today and I literally got two weeks of homework done, deep clean my room, and wrote this, so if I go dark for a few months its probably because I’ve used my adrenaline budget for the year lol.

But seriously, I know this fic gets a bit... deep ig? Idk, I’ve been going through it recently and I wanted some angst that would actually reflect how I would react in that situation if you know what I mean? Like I see a long of angsts where the love interest does something really mean, but a simple apology solves everything and yeah. No hate if that’s your writing style, its just not my thing, and I wanted to express my emotions through here, because nobody directly fucked up an entire month of my work but it certainly feels that way sometimes.

Anyways, rant over, I hope you enjoyed! Feel free to leave any feedback or recommendations you may have.

[nastybuckybarnes]

Of Kings and Beasts  -  Five

Pairing: King!Bucky X Princess!Reader X King!Steve

Summary: Born a bastard of the King of Orlen, you’re thrust to the West to marry the Kings. However, the greeting you get is anything but warm, and your life with the King is far from enjoyable. He knows it isn’t your fault his husband is gone, but that fact alone won’t prevent him from taking it out on you.

Warnings: Language, Kinda Slow Burn, Fluff, Injuries, Kinda Angst

Word Count: 2.7K

A/n: Happy New Year to all you beautiful people. I’m writing this and I’m feeling pretty happy right now but I’m also feeling very drained because I’m working so much and there's shit going on, BUT I wanted to post this because it’s been long awaited. It’s shorter because it’s a rare (Kinda) fluffy chapter and It ends off on a good place to have me starting the next part openly. My brain is mush rn so Idk if this is even making sense.

THIS SERIES CONTAINS SMUT AND DARK THEMES THAT MAY BE TRIGGERING TO SOME AUDIENCES!!! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

~*~

“I need to know exactly what you did to her. She is in there, in pain and agony and you stand here acting as though you are the one who had to endure the hardships.”

James grinds his teeth together, wishing his reunion with his beloved was going better.

“I... I was harsh with her. I told her she would never replace you... that her only purpose was to give me an heir and that she could be easily replaced. She... she angered me and I struck her... I have forced myself upon her in my anger and my haste to consummate the marriage. I know I am wrong for all I have done but I am doing everything in my power to right my wrongs.”

He doesn’t see it coming, only realizes it when his nose crunches beneath Steve's fist.

“You are a coward! A King would not behave like that even if he had lost his entire kingdom! You have treated our wife as though she is a prisoner! And I say our wife because in title that is what she is. However, she is my wife in my heart as well. But anyone can see that she is not your wife in yours. The way you have treated her... you should not be allowed near her.”

He strikes his husband again, his knuckles knocking the side of his cheek as the brunet dodges swiftly.

“I know. I understand that what I have done is wrong but-” “No, James, I don’t think you do! She is terrified of you! She’d sooner seek comfort in me, a stranger, than in you. You are the first face of our kingdom that she met and you...” The blond trails off, beyond furious with his husband.

“You have broken that woman. What can you even say for yourself?”

The brunet backs up a step, his hands raised in surrender as Steve steps closer to him, his hands clenching into fists.

“Nothing will excuse my actions and I realize that. But I will not stop trying to fix the damage I have caused.” 

Steve scoffs, shaking his head at the other man.

“I’m not sure if you will be able to fix it.” They’re both quiet for a long moment before Steve speaks again, walking past his husband and towards the door.

“I think it would be best if you gave both (Y/n) and myself some space. Do not come to either of us unless we have directly summoned you.” The brunet nods, shoulders slumping in defeat.

Steve has to focus on his breathing as he walks back to your chambers, wanting to be there when you wake up and wanting to be in a better space as to not scare you.

When the door opens you’re awake, seated on your bed nursing a small cup of tea.

“How are you feeling?” He asks softly, dismissing Wanda with a nod. You take a deep breath and smile weakly at him.

“Better than yesterday, Your Majesty.” 

A shake of his head at the use of his title.

“Please, (Y/n). You’re my wife. You may address me by my name,” he says while stepping further into the room. 

“Steve,” you test the name, surprised at yourself for liking the way it feels rolling off your tongue.

He smiles warmly at you, sitting at the edge of your bed when you motion to it. You take a moment to really take him in as he sits in front of you.

The second King of Acadia is as gorgeous as his husband. He’s got endless blue eyes that shine with kindness, a kindness that has been shown to you only by Natalia and Wanda since you entered the Kingdom.

His frame is large and muscular, and you find yourself entranced and intimidated by him. Your brows furrow, however, when you see his split knuckles.

“You are hurt?” You ask, looking pointedly at his right hand. He instinctively clenches it into a fist then sighs, shaking his head.

“I’m afraid I let my emotions get the better of me when I learned of what His Majesty did to you.” You frown, looking down at the porcelain cup in your grasp.

Fragile and delicate, just like you.

“My very presence drives a wedge between the two of you. For that, I am sorry.” He shakes his head, fingers coming under your chin and lifting it until you look at him. The way you flinch when he raises his hand has his heart aching.

“It is not you who has created a wedge, nor is it you who drives it between us. James is well aware of his actions and he must face the consequences. He does not get special treatment because he is King. He’s lucky I only struck him for what he’s done to you. He deserves far worse.” You shake your head, grabbing the King’s hand tightly in yours.

“Please do not punish him. I fear he may think his fears are coming true. I do not wish to replace you nor do I wish to replace him. And by punishing him more I fear he may think that that is what is happening.”

Steve’s brows pull together in confusion.

“Do you not wish for him to feel what it is you’ve felt?” You shake your head, a shaky breath leaving you as you choose your words wisely.

“I... I would not wish my treatment upon anyone. But he has made efforts to repair our relationship. I do not wish to anger him with a relationship with you. I fear that us being close may be enough to bring his anger back to the surface.”

Steve is quiet, pondering your words for a long moment before lifting your entwined hands and pressing a kiss to your knuckles.

“If he makes one hostile move towards you I will have him thrown in the dungeon. He will not bring you any more pain. I give you my word.” You nod slowly, not used to someone being so protective of you.

“Now I’m sure you need your rest, so I will not deprive you of it any longer.” He goes to stand up but you tug on his hand, not wanting him to leave just yet. His presence is refreshing. Something unlike anything you’ve experienced in years. And you do not want him to leave anytime soon.

“C-could you perhaps stay with me for a while longer? I... I value your presence. I know that I have only just met you, but you... you are a comfort in a kingdom that has brought only pain.” You don’t mean for your words to hurt him, and the sadness on his face nearly makes you regret speaking.

Until he settles back on the bed, a smile on his face as he squeezes your hand gently in both of his.

“I will stay with you until you no longer want me. This place should be a home to you, not a place of pain, and I will do all I can to ensure you feel safe and comfortable in your own Kingdom.”

The new approach has hope sparking in your belly, and you’re cautiously optimistic about your relationship with Steve. You only hope that you’ll be able to repair the one you have with James before he gets angry again.

~*~

“Is she eating?” Wanda nods, smiling at the blond king from her spot in the kitchen.

“Good. She looks ill. I want her to be healthy again. It is my goal to have her happy in her new home. Undo the damage that James caused.” Wanda sighs, shaking her head.

“They were rebuilding their relationship. Slowly but I’m sure they will have grown to love each other,” she says softly, and then it’s Steve’s turn to shake his head at her.

“It would be nothing more than love built on lies and fear. She deserves more than that.” Wanda nods, her heart heavy. She knows you haven’t been treated fairly, but she had hoped you and James would be able to build your relationship.

“Will you forgive His Majesty?” Steve sighs, not truly knowing the answer.

“I want to, but with what he did... it feels wrong to forgive him.” Wanda nods knowingly, gathering things for your lunch.

“Well, I know that the Queen is well on her way to forgiving him. I think it would do you well to forgive him. However, I have already overstepped. If you’ll excuse me, I need to go tend to my lady.”

She pauses at the doorway, looking over at the King and speaking freely for a moment. 

“I think you would do well to speak to the King with a cool head. Consider all that has happened and all that you had planned for your marriage.” She bows her head then leaves the kitchen, having given Steve many things to consider.

He stays in the room for a while longer, gathering his thoughts and trying to figure out what to do.

As he’s leaving, he nearly bumps straight into his husband.

James averts his eyes, although it pains him to do so. He wants nothing more than to devour every inch of the man before him.

He says nothing, instead, bows his head and waits for Steve to do something.

“James.” His eyes snap up, meeting the endless blues of his lover.

“Steve. H-How is she?” Steve grinds his teeth for a moment, Wanda’s words echoing in his mind before he huffs out a deep breath.

“If you would like, I will take you to see her. However, if she requests you leave, you will leave immediately. Do you understand?” James nods, his shoulders lifting slightly.

As they walk towards your chambers Steve takes a moment to take in the appearance of the brunet.

He’s got deep bags under his eyes and a heeling bruise on his cheek branching out across the bridge of his nose.

His skin is pale and almost lifeless, and Steve feels and for a moment. Until he remembers what his husband did to you.

By then they’re already at your door, far too late to turn back, and Steve knocks softly.

“My darling? May I come in?”

Your voice calls out eagerly, allowing him entrance.

In the few days since his return, he’s spent every waking moment with you, and you find yourself missing him in the few moment’s that he is not by your bedside.

He smiles at the sight of you. You’re far livelier than before, a smile on your face as he walks in.

“Good afternoon,” you say softly, your smile fading slightly as you see the man behind him.

“Your Majesty,” you greet him, bowing your head slightly.

“He is your husband, (Y/n). You may address him by his name. We would prefer it if you did.” You look between the two before nodding slowly, scooting back on your bed to make room for the two of them. 

Wanda smiles warmly at you, handing you a fresh cup of tea before excusing herself.

“May we sit?” James asks softly, motioning to your bed. You nod, taking a slow sip of tea while not taking your eyes off of the two men.

“You look well. You are eating more?” You nod, smiling at James softly.

“The same cannot be said for you,” You whisper, frowning at the bruises on his face.

“It is nothing that I do not deserve. I deserve far worse for all I have done. It is only my hope that we can grow together.” You’ve got a sad smile on your face as you look between the two of them, the tension rolling off of them in waves.

“What is it, darling?” Steve asks softly, reaching out to take your hand. You squeeze his warm hand then sigh, struggling for a moment to find the words.

“I have created a wedge between you. That is not something I ever wanted. I never wanted to come between you, nor have I ever wanted to replace either of you. I... I apologize for all that my presence here has caused.”

They both shake their heads, eyes meeting momentarily, Steve's filled with accusation while James’ are filled with guilt.

“You have done nothing wrong. That is something I want you to fully grasp.” You look at James as he speaks, heart thumping in your chest.

It’s been a while since you’ve had him so close to you and you’re not sure how you feel about it.

“Everything that has happened... it is all my doing. You have not done anything wrong. I am the one who has created a wedge between us... the one who has caused such distance. And I will spend every day trying to make up for that. I know you may not trust me or what I say, but I mean every word that I have spoken today.” You look between him and Steve, bottom lip tucked between your teeth for a moment.

“I want to trust you. I want us to be happy and I want us to have a good marriage, however, I will need time. But I do not want the two of you to be at ends with each other because of me. I fear it will cause far more conflict than it is worth.” Steve looks at you for an impossibly long moment before nodding, looking over his shoulder at where his husband is.

“I do not know how you have forgiven him, but I suppose I will try as well. We will forgive, but we will not forget.”

James nods, wanting to feel relieved but something is gnawing at his stomach.

“Your forgiveness is far more than I deserve. I will not, for as long as I live, be able to ever forgive myself for what I have done to you. The pain I have caused.” His eyes flitter down to your stomach, now devoid of the life that was growing. Devoid of the child that would’ve been his. A child that would’ve been the product of pain and of torment.

“How are you feeling, truly? I can only imagine the pain.”

You follow his gaze down to your stomach then swallow hard.

“If I may be honest with you... a small part of me is sad... but a larger part is relieved. I know it is wrong and horrid of me to think, but I am grateful to not be carrying a child that was forced upon me. It is my duty as Queen to give you heirs, and I shall. But not like that. It is too bold of me and I apologize, but if we are to make this marriage work then it is something that you must know.”

He nods easily, understanding what you mean.

“This marriage... we chose you, (Y/n). Specifically you,” Steve says softly, waiting for you to look up at him before speaking.

“We could’ve chosen any woman.” 

Upon seeing the frown on your face, James jumps in. “When he says that, he means that we had been offered wives before but none of them stood out to us. And then we were presented with you...” You look at him, confusion bringing your brows together.

“The princess of Orlen. A woman with kindness and beauty. From the way your father spoke of you, we chose you. If only to save you from a fate that he promised.”

You’re not sure how you feel about this.

“We spoke of you for weeks on end. We spoke of how we would love you, how we would treat you. How we would bed you...” A shiver races down your spine and you glance down, shaking your head.

“I-I do not think I will be ready for that for quite a while. I am sorry, but I just... I cannot. I can hardly walk without being in pain and Doctor Banner thinks that it may take weeks before I can do anything such as that.” Steve’s hand is on your back, rubbing soothing circles.

“We will wait. Your body has gone through something that neither one of us could ever imagine. We will not be angry with your healing process and we will not rush it. It is as I said before, your health and happiness mean everything to me.”

James nods his agreement but can’t help feeling left out of the tender moment being shared. As much as he may try, he knows he will not be welcomed with open arms. And he doesn’t expect to be. However, it doesn’t lessen the pain. If anything, it amplifies it.

Jealousy and anger simmer deep in his core, and he has to take careful breaths to make sure he doesn’t let them show. The last thing he needs is to scare you further. And although he truly does wish to be on good terms with you, seeing you with his husband the way you are... it brings something monstrous to the front of his mind.

Something he’s only ever taken out on the battlefield.

The good part if him is afraid for your safety if he cannot reel in the beast. But the beast roars beneath the surface, ready to claw its way out and reclaim what is his.

[baroquebucky]

idk if you’re taking requests but if you are could i get a loki one shot where the reader is super shy and quiet and the only person at the tower she really talks to is natasha but the others have tried and failed. but eventually loki comes to the tower and he gets her to trust him and she opens up to him?? or something along those lines lol i’m just in desperate need of some loki fluff🥺 also i absolutely adore your writing 🥰💓

a/n: yup yup ! i don’t write for loki much so i hope this isn’t too out of character !!

in which loki manages to break down your walls, magic free

word count: 2k

masterlist

You sat next to Natasha, quiet as the others laughed at the movie. You leaned over making a small comment to Natasha causing her to burst out laughing, the other looking over to see what had happened.

“tell them!” Natasha nudged you and you shook your head, looking at your hands as natasha repeated your comment, everyone bustling out into a fit of laughter.

“y/n is the funniest person here nobody can change my mind” Tony piped up, smiling at you as your face burned.

The rest of the night went smoothly, keeping to yourself and whispering to natasha, making her giggle.

“you really should try talking to the other y/n, they love you” nat urged you, walking to your rooms to settle in for the night. You shook your head, heart racing at the idea.

“no, i mean they seem nice it’s just i don’t know i get so nervous i don’t wanna make a fool out of myself and plus they’re so intimidating” you chuckled, shrugging your shoulders as you stopped at your room.

“you know you’re an avenger too right?” Nat laughed as you rolled your eyes, waving her off and saying goodnight.

Morning rolled around soon enough and you walked out, steve and Sam saying good morning and you smiled at them, rushing to make a bowl fo cereal and sitting a couple seats away from them.

“so y/n what are you gonna do today?” Steve smiled, trying to make conversation with you.

You thought for a bit before answering, “not much, just train maybe uh, i might go shopping with nat later” you replied, ending the conversation and finishing up your food.

You excused yourself before they could say anything else.

“you know thor is brining his brother today” sam called out and you looked at him confused.

“battle of New York one?” You questioned and he nodded, you raised your brows in surprise.

“he’s good now, nice guy i think” steve added, not wanting to worry you. You only nodded your head and left the kitchen, going to train for the rest of the morning.

“is everybody here?” Thor boomed, a smile on his face as his brother stood next to him, arms crossed across his chest.

“where is y/n? Will she be joining us?” Thor questioned, slightly upset you weren’t there.

“I’ll get her she’s probably sleeping or something” Natasha smiled, heading to your room.

She knocked on your door, letting herself in after a couple seconds and found you passed out on your bed, a book next to your head.

Shaking you gently she woke you up, “y/n, wake up thor brought his brother Cmon” she spoke quietly as you stirred awake.

“what? what time is it?” you questioned, yawning and rubbing your eyes, looking around for a bit.

“3:12, you knocked out after our session this morning” she smirked and you rolled your eyes.

“told you i stayed up late” you defended, getting up and putting on some socks.

Natasha was in a t shirt and some sweats, so you figured your t shirt and shorts weren’t too bad. Surely the rest of the team was dressed casually too.

You entered the living room, still half asleep following Natasha, waving hi to everybody.

“now that everyone is here, this is loki, my brother! he’s a good guy now and since we’re gonna be splitting time between here and Asgard i figured a proper introduction was over due” Thor beamed at everyone.

“well hi loki, nice to uh- meet you, again” steve spoke up, trying to get the others to say hi.

“mm a pleasure” loki gave him a tight smile, you rolled your eyes at his tone. You finally looked at him, he was dressed in an all black suit and dress shoes, you scoffed at his outfit.

“you always dress like that?” You spoke up, upset that he had been rude to steve. Everyone’s eyes went wide, turning to face you and loki looked shocked.

“and you are?” Loki shot back, checking you out.

“y/n, and you should be nicer” you quipped, narrowing your eyes at him. Natasha smirked at loki, knowing how sassy you could be after a nap.

“you’ve got a quick wit, i like that” loki smiled and you rolled your eyes, shifting your weight onto your other leg.

As everyone else warmed up loki you stayed an arms length away, only speaking up when someone talked directly to you.

You slowly moved away from the group, turning to sneak away to your room. A smile on your face as you turned around, only to bump into someone’s chest.

“leaving my welcome party so soon, love?” Loki smiled as you stumbled back, eyes widening.

“how- you were just over there?” You gawked, looking back where you saw another loki sitting and chatting with the others.

“magic, did they not tell you about me darling?” He asked, cocking his head to the side.

“no yeah they did, just didn’t pay much mind is all” you smiled, crossing your arms across your chest.

“you know, they didn’t tell me much about you, why’s that?” Loki asked, leaning against the wall and you fiddlers with your fingers.

“don’t really talk to them much, i- uh I’m pretty reserved” you spoke, a wave of realization washing over you as you fully woke up.

“don’t seem that shy to me” he smirked and you shook your head.

“no i was just really tired I’m so sorry I’m usually not like that I’m so sorry oh god” you spoke, fumbling over your words as your face grew hot from embarrassment.

“don’t apologize, i liked it” he smiled, pushing himself off the wall and moving so the oath to your room was no longer blocked.

“cant wait to see you around y/n” he spoke, letting you walk past him, biting your lip to contain your smile.

And you sure did see him around, telling him good morning when he sat himself next to you during breakfast, sparring with him when he suggested it after walking into the gym.

Loki found himself gravitating towards you, wanting to know everything about you, your favorite color, your middle name, your biggest fears. He wanted to know you.

He was persistent, constantly talking to you and spending time with you, he found himself doing things he never thought he would just to spend time with you. It’s how he was in his current predicament.

“okay just don’t smile or else it’ll crack” you replied, finishing brushing the green face mask on him, letting him use one of your head bands, one with pink fluffy bunny ears (he chose it himself).

“how can i not smile when the most beautiful person in all the nine realms is right here” he replied, making you roll your eyes.

You settled into you before, scooting next to him and turning on your favorite show. Both of you watching attentively as your masks dried.

“can i ask you something?” Loki spoke suddenly, you turned to look at him, a small hum signaling to continue.

“why don’t you talk to the others?” He asked softly, taking your hand in his to comfort you.

You let a couple moments pass to gather your thoughts, finally speaking up.

“they’re just really intimidating to me, i mean i grew up admiring steve and the other have saved the world countless times, I’ve helped them once but i didn’t even play that big of a role, it’s just really daunting you know?” He looked at the way your fingers intertwined and held back a smile.

“how come you weren’t scared to talk to me?” you looked at him, laughing softly.

“oh no i was scared shitless, you just wouldn’t leave me alone so i really had no choice” you replied, looking at your hands connected.

“is that how Natasha got close to you?”

You nodded, remembering the way she pestered you until you two became the best of friends, never leaving each other’s side for a whole week.

“well, i hope you know that I’m not going anywhere” he spoke, moving to face you. Reluctantly, you looked at him, tension thick in the air.

“what makes you so sure?” You asked, looking into his eyes.

Both of you leaned in a little, your breath hitched in your throat as you leaned closer, and closer, and-

ding! ding! ding!

Both of you jumped away at the sound of the alarm, clearing your throats and moving to wash the face mask off.

After you had both washed off the mask you headed back to your bed, sitting down with some space between your bodies. The sound of the show filling the room, neither one of you saying anything.

“what do-”

“why do-”

You both quieted at the sound of the others voice, laughing a little as you both stopped. He motioned for you to continue.

“what do you think about me?” You asked, fiddling with your fingers and picking at your nails, glancing at him for a second before focusing back to on your fingers.

“i think” he trailed off, scooting closer to you, “that you are one of the most amazing people I’ve met, that you are kind, funny and exciting” he finished, your thighs touching as you looked up at him.

“really?” you whispered, dizzy from how close the two of you were.

“absolutely.”

“what were you gonna say?” you asked, giving him a small smile before focusing on the tv show.

“why are you so sure that I’m gonna leave?” He questioned, eyes flickering between your lips and your eyes.

“i- well i never open up to people so they always just leave” you replied, furrowing your eyebrows before continuing.

“when i was in high school and such i used to be really outgoing and loud, everyone would tell me to be quiet when i got excited so i just kinda stopped altogether, no one complained much then” you laughed dryly, remembering the way your friends would get annoyed at how bubbly you were.

“they all left me after i stopped being loud, said i was boring.”

Loki felt his heart fall in his chest, he was angry at you past friends, but he was sad that you had changed so much for people who didn’t appreciate you.

“darling, look at me” he spoke softly, eyes meeting yours.

“i promise you that no one here thinks you are too much, i mean we have that falcon guy and spider boy, i can assure you they won’t tell you to tone it down” he reassured you and you shrugged your shoulders.

“how about we make a deal” loki smirked and you looked at him with narrow eyes.

“what kind of deal” you asked, suspicious of what he would propose.

“you try to come out of your shell more, and I’ll be nicer to the rest of the team” he stated simply, smiling at the way you thought about his deal, he could almost see the gears turning in your head.

“deal” you smiled, turning to look at him and extending you hand out.

He took your hand and pulled you to him, stopping you centimeters away from his face.

“may i?” He asked, eyes focused on your lips.

“yeah” you whispered breathlessly, crashing your lips onto his.

You both pulled away, a smile on your faces, you laughed at the way he immediately pulled you in for more.

You and Loki left your room not long after, knowing the team would be out and about despite it being almost 12 am.

“hi guys” steve smiled and you returned it, walking at bit faster before loki stopped you.

“remember our deal?” he whispered and you internally groaned, nodding and walking over to steve, heart pounding in your chest.

“hi Steve how has your day been?” You smiled, steve was taken back but quickly replied, easily falling into conversation with you.

Loki watched from a far, a smile on his face as you laughed, making conversation with the super soldier. Natasha stood next the Norse god, a smile on her face.

“Glad you could get her out of her shell” she smiled, eyes settling on you talking with Steve and Sam who had joined in.

“she just needed an extra push” Loki smiled, excited to see you become who you really were. Natasha felt her heart grow, she couldn’t wait for the team to appreciate you for who you always have been.