#if it resonates with you in a different way than it does to me thats okay

[neolxzr]

you do see my point though, I was saying that yes a piece of media can have a character imply they are queer, but it’s frustrating when they won’t explicitly confirm such, because of (in the case of… checks app store purchase statistics…. A multi million dollar game franchise!) the need to market to as many people as possible. Shumika will never be “canon” because some people just don’t like shumika and won’t spend money on the game if shu and mika are in a relationship, whether or not that’s because they like the ship or the characters or are genuinely homophobic or whatnot. If the writing team cared about telling a love story, they would tell a love story, not go “well maybe they’re in love, it’s up to viewer interpretation!” like this works, sometimes it adds to the meaning of the work, but enstars really doesn’t have an excuse for their constant “this character might have feelings for this other character, but we’ll never have them say it out loud!” except the fact it makes them a lot of money, since they can market to people who like a character being the way they want that character to be, whether that’s with that character being in love with another in game character or self-shipping or whatever else. Outside of shipping, this is why some characters like Shinobu haven’t changed despite wanting to change (he continuously talks about how he wants to be more mature and taken seriously but his cards continue to make him look small and cute because his fans like that about him and god forbid we change anything!) I just think enstars should not be your first thought when someone asks you about a good piece of queer media because they’re doing just about the same job as large cast games with characters of the same gender (minus Arashi) who continue to have characters go “we’ll do all these things to imply we could be in love, but we’ll never have our characters actually date! teehee!”

i can understand being frustrated about your ships not being "confirmed", but the obsession with what is "canon" and "not canon" is just straight up not a very interesting discussion to have. what happyele's or the writers' agenda is is not of particular importance to me. one of the first things they teach you in classes about media analysis is that once a work is out there, the intentions of the creator no longer matter. the only thing that matters in your analysis is your own thoughts and the way you interpret a text.

if we were having a conversation about how much the creator of something sucks, then sure, talk about that all you want, but i am specifically referring to discussions about the piece of media and these characters and their relationships and their growth and the themes of the work etc. those things are removed from whether or not the company writes the way they do because of profit motives or whatever. companies make money, that's just what to expect. if you want art that is free of profit motives, read something by an independent creator.

even so, it feels strange to place enstars into the bucket of "stuff that should be gayer but the bad company that makes it wont let it be" because the characters ARE so very openly queer. there are so many instances in it where characters pour their heart out to each other or offer themselves to another character in beautiful and poetic ways, and i think it's wrong to claim it doesn't count because they didn't confirm their relationship status at the end of it. if you ask me, there is absolutely no way to interpret enstars in a way completely free of queerness. there is so much explicitly queer text that ignoring it is just plain incorrect. but, if homophobic people like this game and choose to look the other way at all of the gay shit, again, that is not my problem.

why is canonization the only thing that matters? is a shitty BL with awful writing better and more worthwhile than enstars as a queer narrative because the characters had explicit gay sex on screen? are poorly written gay characters in the background of other media with nothing going on more worth talking about than shumika or wataei or rinniki or whoever else just because they say the words 'i'm gay' out loud?

queerness is so much more than all of that. it is so much more than labels and it is so much more than relationships that are easy to understand. it is so much more than the extremely narrow view of it that the internet has concocted about it over the last few years, where you’re only allowed to talk about queerness if you yourself are openly queer and out of the closet, and even then you’re only allowed to make art that makes for “good representation.” that is just so incredibly limiting. i would rather tons of companies who are trying to profit off fujoshis make vaguely gay media with unconfirmed romances and relationships that aren't easily defined by labels than have less queer art in the world.

more queer art means more queer people who will find something to really connect to. more queer art means telling more queer stories. why should who is allowed to write lgbtq media be limited? why should the kind of media people are allowed to make be limited?

its fine to criticize happyelements if youre unsatisfied with the way they do things, im not always 100% in love with everything they do either. i wouldn't even consider enstars to be the worlds' best example of a queer piece of media. but no one is forcing you to like or engage with it or give the company money if you're unhappy with how they write and market their game. they don't owe anyone explicit confirmation that any of their characters are dating, and it doesn't even matter if they do provide that confirmation or not.

regardless of who made it or for what reason, queer stories are worth talking about, "canon" or not.

[samaeldire]

Available on my inprnt:

[geometricalien]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ❤

awww thank you for including me. this has just been sitting in my box for the past couple of days but HERE I AM- in no particular order:

This doesn't really have a name... It's just called Merman AU

and it's not a 'fanfic' it's half a collection of headcannons for this AU and half snippets from this idea that I posted on tumblr at @haikyuu-aus-cuz-i-cant-write (oops look who has actually written now jfdksalf) basically this is a cross between the little mermaid and the monkey's paw. I really liked this but it was wayyy too big of an idea for me to write and you can see that I stopped after writing Suga's wish which is reallly funny considering this whole idea spawned from wanting a mermaid/human bokuaka AU and i was not near to getting to the meat of the story at all

Things That Hold Us Together: Steel Bolts and Tender Hearts

yes i just recently posted this, yes i've had this in my folders for like 3 years. this one... this was spawned from an old friend - who i don't speak with anymore - offhand comment that a fanart looked like akashi was an android. four hours after they said that i had half of this fic, and they said it was the best writing i ever shared with them. they encouraged me to expand it but i kept hitting a wall and then we had a falling out and through out the years ive been coming back to this trying to add and edit and i decided to reclaim it as my own and publish it. the idea is that it's an introduction to a lighthearted sitcom/romcom between decommissioned war android akashi and engineer who fixed him up furihata

Language Barriers

i cyclically get star trek brainrot and this time it had a dash of akafuri, i really like how i described things in this one since furihata doesn't think in words but emotions and images instead, idk it was a good writing exercise

Horror wip

ive been hemming and hawing at it for literal months now because i have one central driving image behind my eyelids that i want to get to. its just been... harder than usual to get to it. i've rewritten like 3 times trying to get it write. i've currently landed on 2nd person narration with some thrown in spices of 1st person to signify that we are in the being- akashi's- point of view haunting furihata (the you) and its giving me an opportunity to make the reader feel akashi's destroying love from the front seat. my other goal with this is to write some surrealistic imagery soooo yeP

I Will Follow You Down Through The Gates of Hell

i cant not include this. this damn fic/series/idea has been brewing in the back of my mind for so damn long if it was a human child it could hold a fucking conversation. the imagery. the themes. the depth of emotion- AND WE ARE BARELY GETTING INTO THE WAR!? ITS BEEN 50K+ WORDS AND ITS JUST GETTING STARTED (or ending, if you wanna look at it that way) idk its... its been so long since i wrote part 1 that that fic doesn't feel like "mine" anymore? idk but it always makes me smile seeing an email saying that someone else liked the fics too.

[randomgooberness]

THIS JUST IN: i have batshit headcanons that get REALLY sad when you think about them more at 11 

COPY-PASTE OF MY DISCORD RAMBLINGS UNDER THE CUT: 

Ive always subscribed to the theory that benrey was a virus but never gave it THOUGHT until thinking abt this dynamic w tommy and his alienness. Like it made me pause and go “WAIT A SECOND. HOW CAN HE BE BOTH.” So hear me out

He is both because viruses are already fucking weird and alien. He’s already a sentient ai of sorts just. Untrained! Like how the other ais are coded specifically and trained in certain ways and given backstories to consider real- benrey was untrained so. He made one up for himself the second he entered the game and it was “alien” because it resonated with him. His biology is only partially based on Xens because hes just kinda making shit up as he goes based on files he examined- but they are still 100% real to him.

He wanted to be apart of something because. What else can a computer virus do. So he programmed himself into Tommy- the backstory being that he’s a weird fucking alien black mesa was studying and that tommy found and was helping escape the day of the test. He had absolutely no malintent doing this- it was more survival than anything.

I think like. Once the science team learns he Forced His Way In theyre all like. Hey dude what the fuck?? EXCEPT gordon who had already kinda had that arc with him- like once hes finally chill with benrey shit comes out and gordon is like. Ok youre already fucking weird whatever plus i can kinda relate as the protagonist. But everyone else ESPECIALLY tommy is like. What The Fuck  because he fucking changed the game they were made for

Like tommy especially is offput because. He altered his memories. And after awhile everyone is like. Ok whatever it happened idc benrey is out friend but tommy has to come to terms that like. While technically benrey making him memories wasnt any different than the coders of the game making him memories the difference is Benrey is his friend and they have to reform a bond of trust. 

its scary because benrey technically has the ability to just. rewrite anything he wanted to! so they could all trust him and he’d be like “dope” and just change shit and lie! except he never does that because he doesnt feel like it and its stupid. the only way they know hes telling the truth is, ironically, gordon. who cannot have his memories altered by this virus. which is ironic considering gordons dissociation problems and delusions but thats just a silly thing for me to giggle at 

ANYWAYS TLDR: benrey, as a virus, implanted himself into the game via tommys memories and has to deal with that when he eventually finds out 

[x1702x]

For Honest favourite characters asks: Do 3, 8, 11, 13, 18 and 43 for Gehrman! Open the floodgate

Wanting to make me cry as always? yep.

3. What first drew you to this character?

Gehrman drew me in mostly because I found him endearing, just an old geezer telling you what to do, I enjoyed hearing his dialogue, his voice is calming to me.

8. Does the character’s looks/design matter to you?

His design is very solid, I like how peaceful he looks hunched over with his cane and then suddenly kicking your ass, besides, HIS HEIGHT? How did all thay hide so casually in that chair?? Grandpa go take ur meds

11. How did you “fall in love” with this character?

My liking of Gehrman grew once I figured his background, I pity him a lot, you see, I've mostly dealed with old people in my life, I used to take visits to my great uncle's residence and I grew fond of the people there. Many are there alone without their family visiting or any grandchildren, I liked talking to them and hearing stories of their lives, being their "surrogate grandchild" in a way.

But since he passed, I believe 2019, I stopped going there since I wasn't a visit anymore. But I had fun there and made acquaintances with some old ladies :) It was nice to see Old people have fun and be so alive.

A year ago my drama club used to take its classes at an eldery center, they were very polite to our group and loved seeing us act, we gave them many laughs and joys. I don't usually cry much about things unless its something i resonate with, and Gehrman just hits different, he's lonely and his only company being the doll (The literal living image of Maria) whos a constant reminder of someone that isnt there with him, you know, it sinks someone down. Ive known people like that, which i think is the main reason I sob over him and yadda yadda. Hes just full of pain and it hurts my soul.

13. If you could draw effortlessly and as much as you wanted, what scene (s) would you draw for this character?

Perhaps something with Maria, tender at most. I dont know, but I want to see him happy. I really do.

18. Do you prefer to see this character suffer or know peace? Angst or comfort? Both?

Peace. He has struggled for long and the way he ends in the game is tragic, no ending will bring him or anyone peace, the moon presence lurks and still wins, you become her surrogate child, another puppet, or continue Gehrman's suffering.

I really wish people saw further than the stereotype they so wrongly put on him of "Creepy old man" Its VERY incorrect and really dims his potential. He's more than "some weirdo stuck on Maria's backstory" He was the first hunter!! He literally made a deal with an eldritch being for hunters to have a respite, brushing aside his life. Hes literally stuck in a nightmare! Aghh,,, sorry im ranting too much but I just appreciate him a lot like errm thats my GRANDPA ur talkin shit about ermm.......

[feminisedlad]

How might one get into "reading for a living" because that's a dream job

it is not a dream job, its called publishing and i make less than 40k a year LOL.

to be less arch, im an editor, and i work in editorial which is the 'flashy' department (lmao), but it's a pretty stressful job. obviously it's one i enjoy because no one would stay in the industry unless they got some reward for it. but still. i say 'reading books' is my job but thats probably only like 40% of it. a lot of my day to day work involves nagging people for deadlines, having meetings abt whether XYZ feature will cost extra, researching marketing trends, etc. YMMV if you work as a book designer or some other dept, i know they have different rules. this isnt to bitch but i think publishing has REALLY good PR among english majors and these are things i wish someone had told me before i sunk money into a publishing degree. BTW: dont get a publishing degree. experience > MA in publishing

so like, i cant in good conscience recommend the industry -- its sort of like going to grad school except with worse pay (the phd candidate gets a stipend; the unpaid intern does not.) but if you already have prion disease and you want to go into publishing, heres what i got

publishing advice below:

first things first, you need book experience. you can get this through the obvious ways (working on ur college lit mag, unpaid internships, copyediting freelance work) but i feel like that prob goes without saying. so what ill say is: if none of those options work, you could always work at a bookstore. lots of the editors i work with actually got their start by saying in the interview, "i worked at barnes and noble and noticed that [category] sells well. i love noticing which books resonate with people" or what have you

i will say that i work in nonfiction publishing, which has some differences from like, editing queer YA fiction. one of those jobs is more competitive than the other. and the industry standards are pretty toxic (if your author misses his deadline and sends the manuscript at 6pm, tough shit, you have to work late to make sure the book doesn't miss its pub date. if you're not thinking about all your books constantly, you must not really care. etc.)

that said one of the best things i can recommend is looking into publishing jobs in different departments. most people are competing for editorial department jobs (things like acquiring and signing books, and being the main point of contact for an author.) but if your passion mostly lies in editing or making things pristine, managing editorial departments often hire production editors who still read through all the books, but their day to day work is more like proofreading, checking barcodes, and other printing related tasks.

theres also finance. finance publishing jobs are never anyones first choice, but on the plus side, you wont have to tell the author why his advance is late. thats the acquiring editor's job. and also lots of people pivot to editorial after they have some years doing finance, design, production, etc.

i will say there are way more remote publishing jobs now than ever. theyre all super competitive but you should apply anyway. if youre entry level, look for "editorial assistant" type roles. some of these actually pay really well: to give an example, harvard hires copyeditors and editorial assistants at a rate which is more than my yearly salary. i mean, its harvard. you gotta look around. but there are more options besides the big 5 publishers. academic publishing is its own field! work at your favorite journal/database! work at JSTOR or wiley!

i dont think theres anything else i would add, other than just random shit talking abt industry standards and quirks of the industry. i dont want to sound whiny because i realize im lucky to be working in my field -- but, i think people oversell publishing as one of "the only career options for english majors."

to be totally honest, most people could make double or triple my salary from being a project manager or corporate editor. so if you enjoy reading and editing, there are better options to you than trade publishing. if you enjoy the act of connecting with authors and making their vision a reality, you might enjoy publishing. or you might not. idk!

[dandeliicnsarchiived]

🚩🚩🚩

send me a 🚩 and i'll share my unpopular rpc opinions and hot takes. bonus points if you include a specific topic to talk about, like follower count, softblocking, graphics, etc. // accepting

Aesthetic vs Writing: I don't see this a lot but I think it needs to be addressed. And I wanna say this is NOT directed at anyone this is simply based off of OLD rpc days that sometimes hit me from time to time. I really hated when writers would be ignored for not having the prettiest of graphics, themes, icons or even url names. I've met some amazing writers who have had bare bones of everything, didn't do formatting and they were often ignored because they weren't aesthetic enough. Just because someone doesn't wanna spend hours trying to make things pretty does not mean that they're bad writers. It's the biggest example of don't judge a book by its cover - actually take the time to get them, learn about their characters and then make a decision if you feel their characters are right for you. Yes aesthetics are attractive but I hate it when it's a deal breaker.

Taking things too seriously: I've been made aware and experienced writers that took things too seriously when it came to writing. Yes, do the research, explain the lore, but understand that you don't own concepts unless youre building from the ground up. Example; I do not own the ideas and concepts of the abilities that my characters have. I often credit where I got the base from and make the necessary changes that fit my lore. If someone had similar concepts you won't see me throwing a rage a fit because someone decided to have their oc have similar abilities as mine. I do not own electricity and fire manipulation. I do not own witch craft AND I SURE AS HELL DON’T OWN WEREWOLF/VAMPIRE HYBRIDS; therefore, I will never been upset if someone has the same things as me. What I'd most likely be upset about is if someone took headcanons that are 95% based off my life experiences/journey through life and applied it to their characters. Example being; my "living with depression" headcanon - the system that Rosalie has to keep herself grounded is the same system I have in order to deal with my adjustment disorder that amplifies my depression. How Rosalie doesn't want to burden people with her depressive episodes is so how I personally act with my loved ones so im not a burden to them. What I do NOT own is the mental illness of depression. It looks different on EVERYONE who has it. We all have our systems to keep us alive. Now, if someone was to come to me and say "hey your headcanon about depression really hit home for me; I'd like to use that as a base for my character because I haven't really thought in detail about how they deal with" THATS COMPLETELY FINE because yknow maybe im not the first person to come up with that system! I encourage people to come to me if people feel like my writing resonates with them and inspires them to think a little deeper. I at most want the respect of asking me or letting me know what their thought process is so I don't assume and get annoyed for no reason. This is a big world but small all the same, we can share, we can inspire but we can't do is take ownership of a concept that has more than enough resources that everyone can use to manipulate in their own way. Also give credit where credit is due- but don't work yourself up over it too much.

Blocking/Softblocking: now I wanna put out there that I RESPECT everyone's rules and understand that they don't owe ANYONE an explanation as to why they choose to block someone/soft block someone. However, HOWEVER; That isn't for me. As someone who has made mistakes in the past and is TERRFIED of doing them again, I'd at least like a heads up and in return I'd so the same to someone else if they upset me in anyway. I don't need the nitty gritty but at least let me know what I did wrong to upset you. The Army taught me to take constructive criticism and that PERCEPTION IS THE REALITY. You perceive that I am disrespecting you, that is YOUR reality, I have no right in telling you that you're wrong. You are ENTITLED to your emotions, and I respect that. On the other hand, I am not a perfect person- I can word things wrong, I can misinterpret conversations and social cues. I want to be educated on how to be BETTER. I can take a grilling, I can take being raked against the coals. You got the evidence? Shiiitt, if it looks wrong, sounds wrong, ITS WRONG. Please give me the opportunity to learn from it; maybe I forced a ship too hard bc I was too excited for the potential dynamic(friendships included in this). Maybe I forgot to tag something that I didn't seem that was triggering and for you it was! I won't ever beg someone to give me another chance, but I will ask on ways to improve so I don't screw over the next person. The last thing I want is to ruin an experience for someone, I did it once and I'll try like hell to not do it again. I won't beg for someone to stay around, you are entitled to your safety and mental wellbeing online. I just personally like to learn from the experience because maybe others like you feel the same way and you could be speaking for them. As much as I say I don't take things too seriously, I take these writing shenanigans as a hobby and have fun; I do take mental health and emotional health very seriously to every writer behind the screen. I don't know what you're going through, I am not you. The very least i can do is listen to understand and fix whatever mistakes I've made and make sure they don't happen again. Also to anyone who has rp'd with me in the recent years, and I've done something to wrong you, I deeply apologize and I hope I didn't ruin an experience for you.

[lanchang]

if you dont mind me rambling a bit bc i love your last post about hualian - ive had that exact conversation recently and really bemoaned how that aspect of divinity feels a bit lacking to me in tgcf, considering were dealing with personal lives of a pantheon (i know that the takeaway is gods are just humans who ascended but i dont think it contradicts my point). hualian is so much more interesting to me when i think of hua chengs pov of a worshipper who is in love with his god and its so all encompassing (hes a zealot) that he fights to not overwhelm xie lian with it once they meet again. What if you build everything you are and have on your devotion. Its also why i really really enjoyed the few fics that explore hua cheng during his search and this kind of fragile state of mind he could have had consisting of rage at the heavens, insecurity bc of xie lians absence and self hatred for being himself. 'Our histories of hunting' save me, save me 'our histories of hunting'. And the one when she encounters pei ming who tries to flirt with her, its also really good

sooooooooo true yeah i get that the takeaway is that the gods are still just people and thats fine but then there is kind of a dissonance in the story because of that. one of the big takeaways of xie lian's arc is that when everyone thought he was perfect and worshipped him the most then the turned on him when they expected him to do more than he was capable of and failed to save his kingdom. and xie lian suffers greatly and loses everything because of that and gets pushed into being evil but overcomes his despair because of one single act of simple kindness thats at the core of the story and xie lian kind of accepts that hes just a person who has failed and is trying his best and its okay. but then the culmination of the hualian story is kind of "i am forever your most devoted believer" but xie lian's devoted believers have turned on him in the past so like whats stopping him from possibly letting hua cheng down in the future? i know hua cheng supposedly accepts xie lian fully and has seen his darkest moments already but how is his total devotion different and stronger than the ways xie lian was already worshipped in the past? is it just because its romantic and sexual in nature? because if so thats kind of a let down and also not very accurate to how humans are lol and since the takeaway IS that gods are still just people and to ascend is human and to fall is also human..... wouldnt it be possible for xie lian to fall from hua chengs graces as well? it simply does not resonate like you cant have it both ways like devotion cant save the day if it also did so much damage in the first place.... or maybe it could in a different story if it earned it as it stands it just kind of contradicts the whole point of the rest of xie lian's arc so overall it kind of weakness both...

but yeah what if you build everything you are and have on your devotion!!!! what then!!! what was it like for hua cheng to FINALLY meet xie lian and build a relationship with him??? we kind of know how much he was holding back but we dont know what that was like for him. theres just soooooo much unexplored with his character!! what were those 800 years like??? did his devotion ever change in any way??? what were his struggles???? so many questions!!!!

ooooooh very intrigued by the fic you mentioned i see its part of a series 😳 i may have to check it out as i ponder more components of the vortex....

[anx1oustig3r]

why do you draw dark willow like that

tbh i could give a snarky answer but i’ve had my lunch and a painkiller so im in a good mood rn

for me a big thing with character design that i love is trying to reflect the characters personality and attitude in the design and … i think i gotta take a moment to talk about valve’s issues with character writing in dota, specifically with poor little mireska sunbreeze

an addendum i also believe that anyone’s read of the character is perfectly fine and valid, this is just mine and i get that it’s extremely different to the Oversight one that’s more popular

tl;dr: i see her as a dangerous, evil character and draw her more sharp to reflect that

mireska in particular really suffers from her canon design. i dont think it’s bad mind you, i actually like it a lot, but i will say the first time i saw the character my response was “ugh of course, waifu porn bait, not surprised.” then i read her lore and i was SHOCKED because the character presented in the lore just didn’t line up with the visuals. now granted, the character in game is very “haha mischievous little fairy” but thats where i want to bring up the inconsistencies.

im firm in my stance that snapfire is the most interesting and well written character in dota, but i seriously believe that spot could have been mireska if they just commit to what was set up with her.

this is her lore piece in game and there’s key words here: spiteful, contempt, manipulation, cutthroat. along with the note that she was GOOD at dealing with this stuff. she fit in with it and even says herself if it wasn’t for her father she’d have stayed in revtel

it’s pretty evident here. mireska is an absolute piece of shit made worse by the fact that this is very clearly an active choice she’s making and has zero intention to change if these lines are anything to go by.

(tumblr is glitching so im praying it chose the right photos)

it doesn’t really come across when you load her into the game. it’s just, cheeky waifu at best. she doesn’t seem all too effected by what she’s supposedly been through. granted that’s the standard of dota writing, but thats what i’m getting at. the lore sets up one character but then the game presents you with another very watered down one note version of them.

so the mireska i draw comes from the character presented in the lore. a rebellious asshole who was fucked up enough to burn her families estate down to the ground AS A CHILD and steal a family heirloom purely to rub salt in the wound of her father, clearly there was some messed up dynamic there but the game wont really elaborate further outside of “overbearing”. i often find myself thinking it would have been great if they let her acknowledge this in game, especially since it’s evident some years have passed since the fire, you don’t become wanted in 6 nations with a nasty reputation and armies worth of assassins and bounty hunters after you in just a couple of weeks.

does she feel any guilt for what she did? has she realised that she’s set herself down a spiral of self destruction but she could stop it at any point as dontè implies? does she know this but trying to change and be better is basically admitting that she’s in the wrong which she would rather tear her own wings off than admit that?

i don’t know if im crazy for having this read of her, or looking too hard into a game that regularly gets memed on for not having any lore, but personally these themes of holding yourself accountable that hang on the back of her character are fascinating and resonate a lot with me. and i guess that’s why i draw her the way i do. i see her as this rough, conflicted character who’ll shank you first, rob you blind and not bother to ask questions. someone with a bitter past that she’d rather leave behind and be the worst version of herself purely to spite whatever expectations were put on her in childhood (given her father was a merchant king and the way she talks about him, there was clearly SOMETHING)

so i use a lot of sharp shapes, hard edges typical of a roguish dangerous character. dark outlines, fangs and claws to exaggerate that she’s a monster and a clear threat. she’s thin and gangly like a bramble stick you’d find walking in the woods in the dead of night, with cat eyes that gleam in the darkness like a predator watching.

i could talk about why i read a very queer interpretation of her too but i think i rambled enough as it is and this is gonna get posted to reddit where gamers will laugh at me and send anon hate to this blog but what can you do, such is life im afraid.

[straybluedog]

my whole issue is that i know that astrology is reactionary and not rooted in reality because its deterministic. the whole point of astrology is determining fate based on the arbitrary position of the planets at your birth.

HOWEVER i find it compelling. and what is compelling to me about it is that it operates on the level of symbol and archetype. sort of in the same way that mbti does (which is also not rooted in reality imo). but the planets and 12 zodiac signs and houses are ancient symbols that are embedded within our cultural unconscious already whether you agree with it or not.

each sign encapsulates the season its in. aries is the begining of spring. therefore it is cardinal (assertive and primary) and it associated with youth, action, striving, excitement. it is life reasserting itself after winter. capricorn is the beginning of winter. also cardinal, it is associated with labor that does not pay off for a long time. it is serious, it is ruled by saturn the planet of restriction and law.

likewise the twelve houses follow the path of the sun through the sky. the first house is the eastern horizon where the sun rises. the eighth house is the western horizon where it sets. it is appropriately called death, or the idle place, and is associated with endings. natives with planets in the eighth are said to be tasked with finishing things others have started, and to be familiar with loss, grief, and depression. the fourth house, falling totally under the horizon is the house of private matters, family, the mother, and childhood. it is the unseen and foundational parts of the native. the tenth house is the peak of the sun and the most public. the tenth house is what you will be known for, and how you will contribute to the larger world.

Like. isnt that much more elegant than fucking personality tests and buzzfeed? i think people generally have a desire to understand themselves through some sort of system that can give them guidance on their place and purpose in life. and it is true that you can tease out all sorts of alternative meanings out of the same birth chart because it is so subjective and there are so many different factors. but i think thats what is good about it! people have the freedom to interpret themselves differently through these different lenses of houses, planets, and signs. each of them impart a different meaning and a level of nuance that the native can interpret in whatever way resonates with them.

to me, astrology is deeply spiritual. and thats why i prefer hellenistic or vedic astrology over modern psychological astrology because theres nothing psychological or scientific about it. trying to reconcile a system that doesnt even use the current position of the constellations in the sky with science is literally fucking stupid. i think the only way to justify practicing astrology is by acknowledging that it is a spiritual practice that helps people to find some kind of deeper understanding of the world through symbol. and so i think people who really love astrology should not be evangelical about it. you should be careful with how it effects your reasoning in the same way christians should be aware of how their stupid ass religion should not determine their whole worldview. yah

[tillman]

what is Robo ky's role in the themes of gg?

hi wifey :-)

i actually rlly rlly love thinking about this particularly throwing his x series themes and ideas behind him next to xrds depiction and then of course throwing all of that next to the little slayer drama cd w him . theres a lot . to chew on . and i think its particularly sad a lot of people arent willing to give his depiction in the earlier games any mind... i have to put on my im sorry women hat but i love him in the x/xx games... sorry..... i lvoe him so bad.

anyways under a readmore cus . its . 3 am dont expect good concepts fleshed out i just want to talk about my favorite robert ideas ok ? hes cute to me.

i like. ok this is not even worth mentioning really but i really liek his like 7 lines in slash. SORRY. maybe just because i play him so so much and he is so so dear to me but well i will take all i can get. anyways this is my favorite of his its very cute. he only shows up in kys route for one ending that has way sicker art of it than it should haev but ..

i love this..... his raison d'etre being exclusively to defeat ky. <- this comes up later too (i love you nok)... like he kinda becomes Exclusively a pawn for the greater pwab story in mc and and also ac but.... like what a simple tie in to the constant gg theme of identity and being human and what not. this w his nok depiction make me fucking insnae... hes truly just some guy trying to prove he is Some Guy. like he sucks and should be put down ruthlessly but hey! thats something!! hes not just a ky clone hes the anticatholic ky clone and that makes him worthy of life just like anyone else. he should be not so weird about women though ok ?

i think i am too autistically attached to like. the assassins guild w millia and venom but the theme in gg that resonates w me most is this idea of life? and what it means to live. and this idea of wanting to live despite everything. life isnt something you earn or have to deserve . theres a lot in millia and eddies AC routes in particular when i think of this ...... anyways its why i genuinely really am touched by xrds portrayal of robo ky as this kinda like. dude who is jsut very confident in his own way of life. all his stuff about dreams and all is basically the exact same as millias ending in AC after she kills eddie and realizes she can move on and live happily and find life outside of zato and shit. u know? i liek when gg does this - telling the same story over and over in different ways. this one in particular is just the one i find myself coming to over and over again....

i also really like robo ky as a like . motivation for venoms arc? i guess? i cant word that. but all the assassins guild members go thru this mostly thru the urge of slayer this like realization they are more than just objects and weapons and can live and find themselves and what not. and like slayer kinda pushes venom over To robo ky as his own sort of mirror in that storyline. which is cute. it works. for both of them . theyre two very interesting characters to pair together and i get why they did it especially w the nok story of robo ky watching mk ii die and be unable to save him and venoms themes in ac mostly ending w this cautionary warning of his own destruction if he keeps up the whole ignoring the guild to look for zato thing. i just like it.

^ in this it does baffle me they became like the Yaoi bait or whatever i dont really understand that. i think theyre silly together but they have such a fucking interesting dynamic... crying rolling around i want their story to continue so bad and not because im biased and want either of them in strive because i think theyre the most fun gimmick characters. hey speaking of that htye are the most fucking fun characters im glad theyre the two arc sys paired up for xrd cus it means i get content of both my mains together easily. epic fucking win. the issue of this is that sadly they are both bad to women . venom is just slightly better because hes just awful to one specific woman and calls her a bitch so so so much . anwyays bad influences on each other on that issue but i like that two of the characters whos struggles focus on being human and reconning with being just a tool of those that gave them life get solace with each other. makes me happy

anyways. tldr. robo kys only addition to the themes of gg is that tits fucking rock and you should suicide bait ! thanks !

[vodid]

Curious, do you like Transformers Animated?

i do now!

i never particularly hated or disliked it, i was just very passive about it. the style was iconic but funky, the characters were unique but massively different than what i was used to, the plot built nicely overall but was difficult to stay focused on when each episode only contributed a little or even nothing to the entire plot. i tried watching animated multiple times and was never able to finish it (thanks adhd) i tried liking it and drawing but i never felt connected to any of it

and then i read some fics 🥲

i think the problem was that the only reason why i even would've liked animated at the time was for jazz/prowl but in all honesty, the ship dynamic/characterizations differed a bit too much from their g1/g1 fanon counterparts for me to really get into it. so i stayed generally neutral on the ship. i like it ofc but i probably wouldn't go out of my way to draw it just for myself unless i really needed to scratch an itch

so i needed different characters or ships to get into since i wasn't gonna find it in jazz or prowl. but i got desperate one day for j/p and read a tfa jazz/prowl longfic that included two other ships i wasn't particularly excited for. i didn't hate them! i was just more focused on j/p than one of the ships and didn't even ship the other

well that changed for sure. by the end of the fic, i wasn't even thinking about jazz/prowl because it heavily got me into....... you guessed it, blitzbee! i don't remember my opinions on blitzwing before this (i think he was just some cool decepticon i decided to draw once) but i knew i didn't care much for bumblebee before. i was a bayverse/tfp fan so that bee never resonated with me

well now he does! and now i get to project my adhd, rsd and apd onto him. and thats what i needed. a character to latch onto, to project onto and to call my own little blorbo. and now tfa bee is one of my favorite bees!! if not top favorite

it was also a matter of being able to draw the show. i didn't feel like my style was as developed as i wanted it to be every time i tried watching it, so that only heavily added to the disconnection. i've gotten better at drawing and have been practicing, so i've definitely grown closer to tfa :)

aaa that was a rant but i have Many thoughts about tfa hsjdjsjs its fun!! and i'm definitely enjoying writing fic for it!

[vantaesfairie]

Hello!!! New here. Just saw ur post and i'd like a reading from u if its not too much to ask 🦋. My question is how would my forever person/FS shows me he loves me? Like his love language and etc. 💕 My initials is SS gemini sun.

Your vibe:

It's kind of like my first impression of you combined with my intuition lol. considering I'm new here. I got the idea that you love the outdoors especially the nature and u may even enjoy raising animals that people could consider weird or exotic as pets, such perhaps frogs. Also, snells, snakes, etc. I believe that those around you are aware of your kindness, especially those who are truly close to you. I think that sometimes people misunderstand you, but when you let them in, they truly open up to you and see a whole new world. You seem to enjoy trying out different things, but on your own terms maybe? You definitely give me a main character energy ngl! Lol

In fact, you make me think of these two characters: Sydney Novak from I'm not okay with this and Leslie Burke from Bridge to Terabithia.

I have the impression that you are a loyal friend who will go the extra mile for your friends. Are you stubborn? I'm not sure why, but I'm getting this lol, sorry if u're not . And I get that you'll do everything you can to achieve your goals. You might be a perfectionist. This a great traits to have but remember to take of your health first and don't be too hard on yourself. I believe ppl also view u as a strong and confident person, and so freaking funny when they get to know you. What about Harry Potter? Do u like this movie? Bcs I keep seeing Ravenclaw and Gryffindor. Maybe you have a blend of both personalities? Both cleverness and bravery. Are you also a fan of astronomy? since I also keep seeing Telescope and saturn 🔭🪐.

That is it yayyy, I would love to hear about what resonate and what not ✨.

Take care<3

hello! thank you for participating. welcome to tumblr too (if thats what you mean when you said you were new lol)

i do love animals and nature, but frogs i literally cannot stand to touch lol snakes they’re very cute and snails also nope. yeah i’m constantly misunderstood, and i googled those two people and i sort of resonate to how you found them similar to me. i am loyal and quite stubborn. and yes i love harry potter! i’m in hufflepuff but used to be in gryffindor. i’m not into into astrology, but i’m cool with knowing more about it 🥰

SS’s ffs love language and showing how they love SS

your fs will show that they love you through giving you your own space, especially when you are tired or stressed and just want some time to yourself. they will also show that they love you by letting you have fun with your friends outside of them, and giving you the space to indulge in projects that make you happy. they may be someone who doesn’t really like physical affection so you will have to respect that too. instead, their love language in return is actually quality time, taking you out, having time and adventure with you, and letting you experience the things that make them happy so you both can share it. they will support you not only as a lover, but also a friend and confidant. they will be your silent supporter. i got a specific message: if you are unhappy in bed at night, they will learn what you like and dislike and give that to you as a sign that they love you and will always be beside you. probably, they will always refill your water, pat your back. this sounds very sweet to me already. they want to see you happy with or without them. they sound like a very self-sacrificing person who does more than they say (in a good way), so treasure them. 

hope you enjoyed! feedback is mandatory. please like and reblog, it would be greatly appreciated. 

[lostacelonnie]

Ah hell my bad i did get. Really busy & really tired the end of year holidays are busy & really draining. I am a sea person but im glad that resonates with non sea people too. People try & talk to you often there? I dont know a whole section of verb conjugation so im not sure how id do there. Fried bread & cinnamon sugar what a peak combination thank you churros. Same i need to pick up more spanish food recipes. Oh? Thats a good start actually. Knowing simple stuff like eggs or grilled cheese or uh. Chicken noodle soup are good baselines. I mean. Yeah same to a degree. I turn them on when im reading or walking/going places. Keeps me focused. Mag is good. Same with nightvale & alice isnt dead. Thats some solid luck kudos to everyone for not getting attacked by gulls. Id wonder about that too australia seems. Nice but very weird. Like their one prime minister who walked into the ocean & disappeared. Kudos to her for finding one she likes & gets along with enough to move there. Ah nothin like light hearted roasting among friends love that for you. Oh jeesh thats like my geometry teacher i had once. Dude would get distracted & then skip stuff he was supposed to help us learn. & still test us on it. Had a different math teacher help me sometimes because he was better at teaching. Hell yeah english teacher for the save. She sounds cool. I dont have time for meta so like. Why bother when if something works it works? Oh is honkai meta that hard? Do i need to focus on that on the way through the story? Oh thats way better like star rail having a pick your own on standard after x amount of pulls. What genshin's fate system could be if it was good. Hmm im not sure where even to start. I guess about himeko. Like her place in the story & what her story in hi3 is. Since i doubt its similar to in hsr. Hell she does have that vibe doesnt she? Chill piracy milf in a way. I hope she becomes playable. A thirty minite backstory? Must be a heck of a joke. Or because of all the polish nuance. Thanks! Ill have to see how she plays of course but personality wise she's good. Fontaine has killed it with interesting characters. Oh? Why the screen limit is it a doctors orders thing? & no worries about that life hit me hard so i understand. Ah thanks im getting to where gear matters a bit so ill need that luck. Need to up talents & such more though. Makes sense then but damn 4 pm as the other option? Both of those aren't super great. I live close to my work which is nice but i still have to wake up 2 hours before for early days because otherwise i wont wake i am not a morning person. 4 am? Hell mad respect for that i could never im barely a person some days at that hour i definitely wouldnt be. Oh nice congrats! On the exam & the history memes. At least your friends are becoming nerds with you. Important group activity. Im caught up on show & manga releases but i do need to read the spin off still when i can find it. Claire has protag rights to one name

AH ITS OK i just. Dont trust tumblr to function properly AJSKFJJH. but ah wishing you some time to chill soon. i understand tho since its the end of the first semester in my school so literally every teacher is trying to squeeze in as many tests as possible. yeah sjdkfkkskdf thats one thing everyone can agree on i suppose!! and it really is like that!! the stereotype about spanish people being seemingly All Extroverted is. much more true than i expected it to be. especially when compared to poland where everyone just more or less minds their own business. and not knowing the language that well proved to be less of an issue than i thought actually!! as in. i do Not speak spanish very well but through a series of trial and error combined with a lot of gesticulation i managed to communicate well enough. AND FOR REAL good lird. they were so right for that. and thanks!! i can more or less follow intermediate recipes so i can Survive more or less. and ahh thats fair, i unfortunately cant really listen to stuff outside my house as i only own headphones and not earphones and i dont like being Completely disconnected from the sound around me when im not at home. but very understandable. ANYWAY YEAH AUSTRALIA IS. A PLACE. i heard about that one prime minister yeah..... wild...... and yeah ajdkfjg me and my friends have been dissing each other for a Long time since i did the same thing in my previous school. always fun. AND AOUGH I FEEL YOU i have. a Lot of teachers like that. but eh im pretty decent at studying on my own [if i find the energy.....] so its managable. with math teachers too actually which is very funny bc last year we had this one teacher [we called her The Brick] who just. did not explain Anything just start doing exercises on the board and then be disappointed when we didnt understand anything. so obviously we were very happy to hear that were gonna have a different one EXCEPT??? SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW TO COUNT???? LIKE GENUINELY SHE DOES SOMETHING ON THE BOARD THREE TIMES AND EACH TIME ITS SOLVED INCORRECTLY. IN A DIFFERENT WAY. ah well. but yes my english teacher is very epic. if nobody got me i know she got me can i get an amen. and exactly i agree with you!! as in. i like when theres a Big Number so i try to more or less build my chars but im not gonna wreck my sanity doing the same domain over and over again. the honkai meta however IS pretty hard so i try to keep up with that. but im much less excited for part 2 so when it drops im probs gonna focus on gearing the chars i already have instead of pulling the new ones since you can do anything with a good support and i have. pretty good supports [HERRSCHER OF TRUTH FOR THE WIN]. id generally recommend Not Completely Ignoring it yeah. tho i did and still managed to pull myself out, but it wasnt a pleasant experience [god. superstring dimension with ungeared teams. Augh.] so. yeah. AND RIGHT???? honkais meta may be painful but the gacha sure is not. I WILL GET INTO HIMEKOS STORY BUT ITS GONNA TAKE A SEC SO ILL JUST PUT IT UNDER A READMORE AND ALSO BEWARE OF VERY VERY VERY HEAVY SPOILERS. since im not exactly sure in what point of the story youre in. AND YEAH shes just. chillen. and the joke is [linguistic rant incoming] actually not That long [i just love hyperboles] although there is one joke that is Actually pretty hard to explain. anyway what i wanted to say is that she has ESSA which. first of all this is slang but its slightly outdated slang [which, of course, doesnt stop me from using it] and it just. well when you say someone has essa it means theyre like. chill in a cool way. cool in a chill way. but also essa itself can be used like. hm. for example if you manage to do sth, say, pass an exam, and you wanna say you did it and also it wasnt very hard?? you can just say NO I ESSA. its not quite translatable into english but needless to say i shall now begin using it. AND YEAH FR rare occurence where genshin made me actually care about male characters. as in. i love furina forever but neuvilette has actually proven to be someone i like as well.

[once again. tumblr forcing me to do a paragraph break] his autistic swag has captivated me. and yeah ajdfkgjsj as it turns out im both farsighted and have astigmatism so i should be limiting my computer usage...... its ok tho im trying to get into traditional art more and also studying is easier. so Its Joekay. ahhhhhh talents are such a pain to level up.... i just never have enough stuff for them seemingly. yeah my history classes have godawful times good lird. and we actually do less material bc of that since our teacher just refuses to do anything on the 6pm classes and just does twice the material in the monday block instead. i love my life. fair enough tbh, i picked up an ADDITIONAL 7am class bc its not mandatory and was close to disbanding but my classbestie really likes it so i joined to make it less likely to fall apart but ah. im regretting my decision. but at least the teacher is nice so. AND FOR REAL i do not understand where they get their energy from. or the dedication. ESPECIALLY for this godforsaken school. and ah thankies!!!! and good luck with catching up!!! i LOVE the manga sm omg...... im also very excited for the anime since the love scale arc is starting today and its my favorite........ big hype. and ah i started playing noita recently!!!! very fun i love games that are engineered to hurt me personally

ANYWAY. ONTO THE HIMEKO LORE

i Should mention that im not an expert on himeko lore BUT ill do my best hehehe. however i will reiterate that heavy spoilers ahead, especially for chapter 9.

SO himekos backstory is revealed in the alien space manga [which, admittedly, i read only because i found out shub niggurath appears by the end and i love niggurath] but it goes more or less like this. i wont go into detail about what Exactly happened because truth be told this is a pretty long manga and i simply do not have the motivation to do an Entire Summary but basically. when she was in university, her father, who was working for schicksal and also the host of an Actual Literal Alien kiiiiiind of went berserk [without her knowledge, of course] and welt had to Kill Him. which is pretty bad because they knew each other and were Kinda friends. anyway since her mother was already dead and she was infected with honkai at the time, this caused her to join schicksal! of course, the entire time kept in the dark about what exactly happened to her father. so when she was in schicksal, she was in the squad let by ragna lothbrok, who also ended up dying in action, and himeko ended up in saint freya. she also made bianka join schicksal! so anyway this is where we get to the main story. i wont go into chapter chiyou bc im gonna be honest i remember Nothing from chronicles. but she was kiana and the others from the main squad mentor, guiding them through their journey as valkyries. when kiana awoke as the herrscher of the void during the void arc, she was also Actively Dying from honkai poisoning [since valkyrie gear uses the honkai in it but she had pretty low natural resistance to it]. fu hua gives her an antidote that Could save her life but, during the final lesson, she uses it to temporarily seal the herrscher of the void so that kiana can live on. and dies in the process. i cry watching it to THIS DAY. but himeko remains as somewhat of an Afterlife Guide to the end of the series, appearing as flashbacks and visions in the chapter 11 ex cg, meteoric salvation, like an entire section of set tomorrow ablaze, everlasting flames, and graduation trip. to summarize, I LOVE HER AND WILL CRY ABOUT HER AGAIN. AOUGGGHH. she actually means so much to me you have no idea you have NO idea

[fleur-de-femme]

Limitlessly Spreading her Constrained Sorrow to Achieve a Hallucinated Completeness

it is moments like this when i feel the most overwhelmed.

Looking at social media does not help, just rushes in the information of hundreds. So much light goes through the mirrors  that they become blind-sighted and you cant even see yourself with in. I don’t know why my brain can never just settle down and work to a task but i think its because someone is trying to tell me something. It feels like my brain just replays certain quotes that I have heard from other people, over and over again like a broken record. I have so many people in my head telling me different things and I cant make use of all of them, I can’t even make out the words most of the time. How do I separate them from my conscious and subconscious? Why when I see someone they visually seem fine but I can sense  from their true energy (based on subtleties such as a constant shake of their leg or a slightly extended pause in their speech ) that  tells me otherwise. I’ve always thought of those people being able to filter out the noise that is why they are able to create a cohesive thought. But what if they are just better at grounding their face?

[The isolation gets to me sometimes I can’t lie. Im not sure if its the isolation that drives me insane or the fact that I am scared of living through my thoughts.]

It’s scary because Im truly realizing how wise and intuitive I really am. Like one part of me holds a lot of information and knowledge in which I am able to define patterns within myself and others and in society as a whole and recognize it as parts to a whole rather than thinking in black and white morals; some things are just responses and reflections to something else.

Like for example, with this whole depression thing going on. I keep associating these feelings of fatigue, withdrawnness, and overwhelm in a category of “bad” rather than the “good” category where I place emotions like excitement and motivation. I am someone who loves to live in excitement, and this is where I think I get things confused. There is only but so much that one can do at a given time and has the right amount of energy to do so. I am not a god. I cannot produce an infinite amount of energy.

I think for me, these feelings are arising because:

A. I was not on the right meds

B. My head is filled with all of these ideas and questions and thoughts and I am just trying using different variations and forms of escapism.

My mind is always in a constant state of wonderment and awe and there is just so much information out there and so much to explore and so many concepts. There is just so much beauty and so many tales and I want to feel and live through all of them. And thats why i love philosophy and fashion and photography because I think they truly take these thoughts that all of us go through and package it in a way that can really resonate with others so they can feel ok with the fact that we don’t know anything.

I’m still trying to wrap my head around psychological evolution . The way that we have evolved into beings that can separate itself from the other is just crazy the more you think about it. Oceanic consciousness is that we all take in everything at once we are one with the universe. Animals, babies ,and primitive humans have this. It is more of a collective mindset that doesn't allow for one to perceive oneself as a distinct entity from the whole.

Humans developed away from this for some reason? Or are we really as separate as we believe?Technology has really reminded us how collective our minds truly are. It is terrifying how something we birthed has ripped through us and is exposing the harsh truths of how insignificant we are individually. How wrapped up we are in the perception of others and typical our personal styles and ideals are. We really thought there was more to this!  Leaving us overwhelmed and confused because everything we thought we knew about ourselves is a lie. We are still a collective mind. But knowing the presence of oneself makes us think we are separated from each other when we are actually not. The illusion of the self.

[theyneverblindmedarling]

whats your ts album/song ranking and hs album/song ranking

Woooof I'm soooo bad at album rankings and it changes frequently but I'll try my best.

So for Taylor I think in terms of favorites for me its 1. 1989 2. folklore 3. Red or speak now 4. fearless 5. lover/evermore 6. debut/rep

1989 will always be that girl for me even if its not objectively her best work in terms of songwriting. Like as an era its cohesive, shiny, fun and poppy and so light and breezy in every way I love and the songs (besides bad blood) all hold the most special places in my heart.

folklore has some of my favorite taylor music ever on it like the way that album makes me feel as a whole? unmathched. the lyrics? unmatched. It was an album released at the right place right time for me and imo is a valid contender for her greatest album ever.

red and speak now I'm soooo conflicted about okay hear me out. The rerecording gave me the biggest red fever like I was revisiting songs I slept on like starlight and I almost do etc. and enjoying them like it was the first time. I genuinely love red and while its not super sonically cohesive and not all the songs do it for me I think the ones that do (plus the nostalgia I have for it) make it high in my ranking. Speak Now I'm tentatively placing next to red because I've been revisiting the hits off that album and god thats some of her best work. Speak now has a list of hits that are god tier songs and its not my fav album simply because like red, not all the songs do it for me in the same way like 1989 and folklore do. But I think the rerecordings of speak now are really gonna catapult that album in similar ways the fearless one did (but hopefully to higher heights bc we don't speak about speak now enough).

fearless is a cute little darling. It is a very cohesive album that I didn't acknowledge much until the rerecordings. There are some absoultely darling songs on there and the whole album makes me feel all glittery inside. It is not without some songs that I simply don't listen to though which is why its lower than some. Like many of taylors albums I find that the songs that hit, hit and the songs that don't, don't as much. But basically any album that has the way I loved you can't be lower than this I'm so sorry.

Okay now we get controversial I feel. Lover as the individual songs I enjoy from it hits. There are like three categories of songs on lover for me. The absolute bangers, the fun for the times, and the unlistenables. An album with high highs and low lows in my opinion. Its like a frustratingly non cohesive project and I feel that that may have been the point? but at the same time like she sets up such an interesting concept for an album with daylight which feels like a conclusion to a completely different album than what we got in my opinon. Idk unlike red the non cohesiveness does not lend itself kindly to this one and its got too many misses to go much higher on this list for me imo (also some of the political insertions are so contrived and cringe and ruin even good songs for me like its just forced.) To be fair evermore could easily be above lover for me. In fact it probably should be. Its got some of my favorite writing from her much like folklore and the hits be hitting. I have this problem with evermore though where I don't listen to a lot of the songs on it. I love the songwriting and the concepts behind them but the songs are almost more lacking than I want them to be. I lovee tis the damn season and gold rush and evermore ( and some others) but its not as much of a full yes as some of the others on here. Maybe its a grower and I haven't given it a chance which is why I do believe this can change.

Rep I'm honestly bitter towards. Its got hits, the tour was cool, but goddd it just feels sooo....i dont even know like it does not work with me. I think the message behind the era was interesting but the way the concept was explored doesn't resonate with me the way it does with seemingly everyone else. Also the really trap production notes fall flat for me like most of my critiques are just in the backing tracks of the songs like some of them I wish were done quite differently because parts are great and others im like begrudgingly listening to like the corniest dialogue over the crunchiest goddamn bass synth i've ever had the displeasure of listening to. Maybe this will be fixed in rerecords? but I doubt it and yeah thats why its not higher sorry. Debut is down here simply because...shes cute and thats it. I never listen to her and like its not a bad project its just kinda there for me like idk it doesn't stack up as well against what shes done since and thats fine like its her first album and she was like a fucking baby or whtv when she wrote it so of course its not her best you've got to start somewhere.

For Harry I'm less opinionated I feel but I struggle ranking as well

I think at the moment its 1. Harrys House 2. Fine Line 3. Harry Styles

BUT this changes frequently and the reason I have trouble ranking his albums is for a reason dissimilar to taylor. The reason is because there are songs I love individually on say Harry Styles 1, that I love a lot more than some on Harrys House. Same with Fine Line. Like Fine Line and Harrys House are much more cohesive albums which I repsect whereas Harry Styles 1 was much more emotional. That all being said, the songwriting on his earlier albums resonates with me a lot more than it does on some songs on Harrys House. Idk its hard to describe like Harrys House is definitely more geared towards sounds I like listening to but fine Line is a much more balanced emotional, interesting and cohesive project. If anything fine line feels like the fine line between his other two albums, balancing the production and fun of harrys house with the emotions of HS1. Idk I don't hold the same emotions about harrys house as I do fine line or harry styles but I listen to it the most bc I like the songs on it a lot thats the best way I can describe it.