#if the grammar is rough forgive me i wrote this all in like one sitting on my phone pF

[violynt-skies]

Why Leo didn’t truly step into the leader role until the Krang Invasion:

(this is gonna be a bit of a longer post but i’ve just got so much to say on this so plz bare w me for it. i shall include a TLDR at the end tho bc ik i have a tendency to ramble.)

okay so from the beginning of the movie it is clear the Leo hasn’t really taken his leader position super seriously, even after two years we can still see the group seeming to follow Ralph’s lead the majority of the time, with Leo going off plan and doing what he wants.

But i believe that the real reason leo took the role of leader so leniently and didn’t really change his behavior regarding it till the Krang invasion occurred is most likely due to a crippling fear of failure.

Because if he pretends to not care and turn everything into a joke there will always be the excuse that he was never really trying and that’s was why he was a bad leader if anyone ever tried to questioned it

BUT. if he were ever to actually try and really attempt to step into his role, it would mean that if he ever failed at any point during that time, then it would truly mean that he was a bad leader. And Leo wanted to avoid that conclusion at all costs.

His coping mechanism has always been humor, an attempt to cover up true feelings and take away from the seriousness of a situation bc it lessens the impact of any high emotions going on at that time.

It’s the same way procrastination works for so many people. In the way that people will put off doing the work because they’re afraid of failing even after putting in effort. Procrastination is an excuse for doing badly and hurts less than if you actually gave it your all and still failed. His humor and casualness is an excuse for his lackluster behavior as leader.

Leo has been shown on few separate occasions of his insecurities regarding his placement and role in the team, and with the leader role having been pushed on him, the reality of those insecurities becoming true became closer than ever before and he wanted to avoid that at all cost.

Even during the movie when Raph is lecturing him we can see how Leo takes criticism. He deflects all the time and never wants to come to terms with it because he doesn’t want to face his own faults, but he’s also shown to clearly be listening and you can tell the words are sinking in he just doesn’t want to accept them.

And this behavior continues because till that point things have turned out fine for Leo. The way he ran things has always “gotten results.” And it wasn’t until those methods actually resulted in real consequences (Raph getting kidnapped) where he has to become more serious and enforces his position as leader because he can’t afford to be lenient about it anymore, especially with Raph out of commission.

In terms of procrastination, the Krang Invasion was essentially his deadline and the point where he was finally needed to put in the effort.

However at this time he hasn’t reevaluate his behavior or the way he does things because he hasn’t been proven that his methods don’t work well for a team yet, and bc he was dealing with the distress from losing Raph his recklessness worsened.

This is until his brothers get trapped under the subway and he gets the wake up call he needs. And it’s soul crushing because this was a moment in time where he HAD been attempting to be a leader and he ended up failing. He finally had to face his own faults as a leader but this moment was so needed for him in order to improve.

And he does! He learns from his mistakes and takes the time to listen to his team and we can see his true potential shine through as he learns how to rely on his family and how to lead them.

And everything really kicks into high gear once on the Krangs ship as we see him understanding Ralph’s perspective while fighting him and watching his brothers struggle under the Krang as he gives his genuine apology and big motivation speech.

This is the final endpoint where we finally get to see him in action really step up as leader

of course the situation got worse before it gets better (insert entire last 30 minutes of the movie) and god that self-sacrifice scene was just heart-breaking and he’s going to be traumatized for life but that’s a post for another time

TLDR: Leo took his position as leader so casually because of the fear that if he ever actually attempted to lead he would end up failing, however in being lenient about it there would always be the excuse that he was never really trying and that would be the reason for any kind of failure that came his way. It was easier to brush off this reason than the other. However the Krang Invasion was a huge wake up call where he was needed to actually put in the effort and learn how to be a true leader, which he does eventually learn to be and succeed at it.

have some loving family shots cuz we deserve them <3

[mrsdeanwinchester19]

The Interview

Steve x reader

Word Count: 1.7k

Summary: The Avengers have interviews with a news outlet and it doesn’t go as expected

Type: Fluff and humor

Warnings: None

Author’s Note: This was inspired by the Jiminy Glick/Jimmy Fallon interview

The Avengers compound was almost completely quiet, Steve was the only one awake.  He doesn’t normally stay at the compound anymore, preferring to stay at his house, but they got in late from a mission last night and fell asleep after taking his suit off.  The only noise came from the drip, drip, drip of the coffee maker as he mentally tried to prepare for the interviews the whole team has today.  Everyone had been assigned a journalist for a news outlet called The New York Sun.  They were doing a piece on the Avengers, hopefully they won’t try to turn it into an exposé, but it’s not like they would find any information that isn’t already on the Internet after Natasha decrypted and released SHIELD’s files.

Bucky stumbles into the kitchen in a long gray and purple striped robe, looking like he just woke from cryo.  “Good morning sunshine,” Steve jokes.  Bucky glares at him before taking the cup of coffee that Steve had prepared for himself before walking back out.  “FRIDAY,” Steve says to the air.  “Set an alarm for everyone’s room.”  He smiles slightly when the loud alarm starts blaring in all their rooms.  

Sam slams his door open and looks around frazzled.  “What the hell, man?” He clearly woke up thinking there was some kind of attack happening.

Steve simply shrugs his shoulders in response.  “You need to get ready.”

Once everyone had gotten up and gotten ready, they all have a meeting in the common area.  Tony orders them not to say anything the people don’t know about already, don’t say anything about each other, and definitely don’t talk about relationships or family.  

The journalists are spread out around the compound, each in their own room, so Tony tells them where to go to meet their journalist.  Steve goes into the conference room to see one chair turned away from him.  When he closes the door, the journalist spins their chair around and sets their papers on the table.  Steve is immediately struck by how beautiful the interviewer is. Long Y/H/C hair tumbling over her shoulders, bright Y/E/C eyes staring into his baby blues.  She’s wearing a tight black skirt and a white blouse that Steve can slightly see her lacy bralette through.  

“Steve Rogers, nice to meet you,” she says, extending her hand.  Steve grips her soft hand in his rough one and shakes it.  He can’t help but notice the lack of a ring on the hand he didn’t shake.

“Nice to meet you too Miss…” he trails off.

“Y/N.”

“Miss Y/N.  It’s not often we do interviews, just press conferences,” he says, sitting down across the table from her.

“Well, normally I interview celebrities, so this is a nice change of pace,” she answers.  Apparently Steve isn’t a celebrity in her eyes despite the fact that he’s a national icon and has been since World War II.  

“What would you like to know?” Steve changes the subject.

“I want to know about your journey.  I want to know how-” she checks her notes, “-Steve Rogers got to where he is today; but not too much detail because I don’t actually care.  You were born where?”

“I was born and raised in Brooklyn-,” Steve explains, but she cuts him off.

“-Isn’t that wonderful? Poor Brooklyn or Newsies Brooklyn?”

“Uh, it was more poor Brooklyn.”

“Poor Brooklyn, okay. And I’m assuming from the grammar…limited education.”

Steve nearly has to keep his jaw from dropping at her audacity.  To keep his mouth from opening, he clenches his jaw as she continues with the questions.  He may not be a genius like Tony, but he’s smart.  While Tony’s head is filled with ideas for inventions, his is packed with military strategies, fighting styles, and a lifetime of wise advice that the team never wants to hear.  Then, at night, what takes over his mind is how embarrassing the Rappin’ with Cap videos about hot lunches and tooth decay are.

She continues before he has a chance to respond, “There are a lot of words you don’t say.  Rumors are you don’t swear, is that true?”  Steve nods his head in affirmation.  “Why?  Are you scared of saying the words or something?”

Steve sighs, used to this kind of response.  “I just think it sounds unintelligent and unprofessional.”

“Ah, and with your lack of education you want to sound as smart as possible.  So, moving on, you stopped producing weapons.  You said ‘I’m not gonna do it anymore’.  Why is that?”

“Yeah, that uh, that wasn’t me, that was Tony.”

“And you are…?”

“Steve Rogers.”

She gasps, “These questions are not- I’m not prepared for this!  Alright, improvising.  Here’s one, how are you alive?”

“I beg your pardon?” Steve asks, not quite understanding if she’s referring to his age or a certain mission he shouldn’t have come back from.

“You went into the ice. Human cells are mostly made of water. When water freezes, it expands. Your cells should have burst.”

“They think that the serum prevented it from happening.  The doctors said that instead of the water in my cells expanding that when it got cold it clumped together and turned solid.  I’m not a scientist though, that’s something you would want to ask Bruce or Cho, they tried to explain it to me.”

“Bruce isn’t a medical doctor, right?” she asks.

“Right.  But he studied the serum, attempting to replicate it and now that I’m here again he’s trying to learn more about it.  I was basically a pin cushion for him in the beginning, he took so much blood.”

“Alright, last question. I wanna ask you about your relationship with Bucky Barnes.”

“He’s a very good friend-“ Steve begins.

“Lover.”

“What?”

“Is he your lover?” she asks again.

“No, he’s just a friend; basically my brother,” Steve defends.

“Admit it in this interview, he’s your male lover!”

“You’re just trying to get a reaction out of me!” Steve says.  He knows he shouldn’t let her rile him up at all, but he can’t help it when the entire interview has been to hold.

“I’m not trying to get a reaction.”

“Yes you are, you’re trying to get a reaction out of me by saying ridiculous stuff like this!”

“I’ll tell you the reaction that I’m trying to get over, I’m trying to get over the fact that I thought this was with Stark!”

“You gotta be shitting me.”

“Oof, Rogers, you kiss your wife with that mouth?  Or should I say you kiss Bucky with that mouth,” she says.

Steve pulls at his own hair before walking out of the conference room.  She’ll find her own way out.  What the hell kind of interview was that?  The questions were almost nonsensical, followed no pattern or sequence, and apparently she thought she was interviewing a different person.  He’s been angered by interviewers before, especially when they try to work in “gotcha” questions, but never straight up insulted like this with the education comment.  He’s not sure if the others are done with their interviews yet but if he needs to talk to them, he can text.  He’s headed home.

  You unlock your front door and drop your purse after closing the door. Before you even get a chance to turn on the light, a voice calls out.  “Limited education?”

You jump a bit and put your hand on your chest.  You look over to see a dark figure on the couch.  He stands up and slowly walks over until he’s in the light shining through the front windows from the street lights.  “I think you deserved it,” you say.

“Oh really?” he asks.

“Yes.  Texting your wife that you’re getting in and then staying at the compound?”  You walk closer to him.  “I stayed up for hours worried that something happened to you in the last few minutes of the flight and you said I’m not allowed to call you during missions.”

“I’m sorry babe, my phone died and I passed out when I went to go take off my uniform.  Can you forgive me?” he asks, wrapping his arms around your waist.

You look up at him then at his chest.  “I mean, a massage would definitely help…”

He laughs.  “I was about to ask the same thing of you, especially after FRIDAY showed Tony the full recording of my interview and then had an almost two hour phone call with me about it.  He’s gonna kill me when he finds out the interviewer was my wife.  Actually it’s gonna be when he finds out I got married and didn’t invite the team.”

“Well don’t worry about it,” you say, setting your hands against his chest and feel his strong heart beating beneath his skin.  “He’ll understand since you two weren’t on good terms at the time. In other news, I wrote you a shining review about how you’re smart, selfless, brave, kind, and how sexy your ass is.”

He laughs and leans down to kiss you.  The kiss is chaste but sweet.  “We’re having dinner with the team on Thursday.”  

It’s Monday today so that gives me only 3 days to mentally prepare to meet the people most important to him. “Are you sure?” I ask nervously.  

“Of course!  You already know Bucky and he loves you.  I’m sure the rest of the team will too.  Besides, how else will we explain the great article about me when Tony saw the interview.”

“Did you tell them they’re having dinner with you and your wife?” I ask.  I have hung out with Bucky and Steve dozens of times.  He comes over for dinner at least twice a week and he was the best man at Steve’s second wedding.  Because Tony and Steve had been split apart, he really wanted Bucky at his wedding, even though he wasn’t fully recovered yet.  I think Steve would’ve put him in a straight jacket had it meant he could be there.  Bucky also wanted to be there more than anything, he was just terrified he would ruin Steve’s day.  So after telling Bucky, you had a small, second ceremony that Bucky was able to attend, along with Steve’s Wakandan friends. We may end up having a third ceremony that the team can finally attend.

“Nope.  I just told them team dinner on Thursday and they have to be there.  But for now, how about we head to the bedroom and get reacquainted?” he asks, wiggling his eyebrows and biting his full lower lip.

“Yeah, you need to take care of your wife that you left alone for a week.  Otherwise you’ll get an article about your secret addition to glazed donuts and soap operas!”

Taglist: @imanuglywombat​

[elias-veturius-laia-of-serra]

A Sky Beyond The Storm: SPOILERY Review

*!!BEWARE!! A Sky Beyond The Storm Spoilers below. And it’s not just a little of them. It is FULL BLOWN COMPLETE SPOILERS! SO BEWARE! DO NOT READ THIS REVIEW IF YOU HAVEN’T READ A SKY BEYOND THE STORM!*

[CAUTION] This is all my opinion so please don’t leave anything negative. Or send hate or think this is a welcome post to start arguing. I’m only posting this cause sadly my friends have not finished the book yet and it’s been five days since I’ve finished and I have yet to be able to explore how I fully feel about the book. Thankfully writing this tired me out and completely reflected everything I feel! It was the perfect outlet! I also wrote it all in one go just pouring all my emotions out so if the grammar is bad or some things don’t make sense. I’m sorry! I’ll be sure to edit this at some point ❤️

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Wow.

Five years. I had stuck to this series for five years and it’s always given me love, heartache, pain, loss, but most importantly hope. 

I want to start off by talking about how happy I was with how Laia’s arc was handled. Usually when you have a “weak” and frightened protagonist their growth is mainly focused on how quick they can shed that image and because something else entirely. How they can become an ultra badass that is able to hack and slice through their enemies and become this killer warrior machine, but Laia Of Serra is not a killer. And that’s been reiterated throughout the books. She feels too much, cares too much, and loves too much. She mourns the for any lives lost even if it is the enemy. She hates taking lives cause she sees no reason to take one even if it is for the greater good. As shown in Torch and Sky, She cries after she accidentally that man. She’s wrecked with guilt when she accidentally kills that jinn. At the people who fall during this war. Laia Of Serra isn’t a killer. She’s hope. She’s love. She’s understanding. And many people do see that as weakness but I love that Laia is able to harness these emotions that make her human as use it as strength. That at the end of the day she isn’t a badass savage girl who lost everything and is out for blood. She’s still just Laia and I wouldn’t have it any other way! Being a big emotional scaredy cat I am I’ve never been able to relate to the big badass skilled warriors that can take down armies of men. I wish to be like them but the reality is I’m not. So I never thought I could see myself being a hero or doing any good if the time for me to be one ever came, but Laia really conveys that strength is more than just being able to shed blood and kill people. That it’s okay to cry, to be scared, to feel sad, and be insecure. Brown girls are always so used to being silenced and taught to behave in order to survive. That’s been our story for a long time but Laia was able to turn our meekness, our fragility, our fear, and our insecurities into something strong. Into something that moves her forward, that taught her how to fight, and that  ultimately makes her victorious. The Her final scene with the Nightbringer was beautiful and utterly heartbreaking.

Which brings me to the Nightbringer.  I used to hate him so much unable to understand him. I found his anger equivalent to that of an edgy teen that got told “No” too many times. But despite his cruelty book 4 really opened my eyes. Despite all the deaths and rage Sabaa has managed to also convey all his loneliness, his sadness, his hopelessness, his loss, and how all this pain had driven him to believe this was the only way he’d be able to be at peace. To get rid of the world that had been so cold to him. To get rid of a world that made him feel unaccepted and had taken away everything that mattered to him until all he had left was the broken pieces of himself with no one there to help him pick them up. I loved the Nightbringer here. I learned to respect him so much. He’s carried so much pain and loneliness for thousands of years in hopes to gain back what he has lost. I was finally able to sympathize with him and much like Laia - I didn’t hate him anymore. Couldn’t hate him. Of course what he did was wrong but it’s hard to wish more unfortunate things upon someone whose whole life has been nothing but misfortune. I loved his story with Rehmat. Their love though mentioned briefly was a beautiful thing and I found I wanted nothing more than him to be able to be with her again and to be able to feel that love again. I used to cringe and loathe the idea of Nightbringer and Laia being romantic but this book opened my eyes into seeing that that isn’t it at all. I mean yes he is in love with her but that’s just the kind of person he is. He loves. He’s the beloved. He has many loves. As his queen once said, he loves too much. So it isn’t about sparkly forbidden romance. It’s the fact that Meherya had love for all things and to be betrayed because of it had hardened his heart. Laia knows what this feels like. So to see her hold him and tell him it’s okay. That his feelings are valid and the world turned it’s back on him first, but he can’t blame all life for that. That she knows deep within him he still loves, he still hopes, and he must hold onto that. Skies, nearly made me cry. Then by the end when he is able to tell her goodbye with a hand to her cheek and she knows despite everything he still loves her - I nearly started bawling. Because he truly is the beloved and he did not deserve all those who took his love then basically spat in his face. I was happy to finally see him be able to reunite with Rehmat. His one true love and his only queen. Cause I know through her and finally leaving this world - he will be able to finally be at peace.

Now onto the next character. Elias. WHEEEEW! He was as cold as Sabaa promised. So distant and stoic. Reading about him through Laia’s P.O.V. was so heartbreaking. Yet reading through his was ALMOST worse. Where as Laia can’t find her Elias we are able to see little cracks of it. He still looks at her for too long. Lingers at the thought of her for too long. His heart beats faster when she is around when it shouldn’t. He remembers things he shouldn’t. Being around her is too hard because she is everything he had originally fought for. Inner Elias still sees her as his home and his freedom. However his cold demeanor was nearly too much for me! I even almost contemplated unstanning my favorite OTP in the world when he left her to the jinn. Though I think a lot of that mainly has to do with the fact cause we see how much he loves her. He’s risked so much for her so to see him abandon her was like a slap in the face and truly showed how much he has changed, but thankfully there was hundreds of pages left for him to make up for it. And of course in an Elias fashion he did. When the nightbringer had her captive he couldn’t get himself to leave her again. When he saw Laia scratched up after falling into a river and his thoughts immediately thought of ways to defeat this river (I cackled). When he told her he wouldn’t be able to help if she were to get in trouble trying to steal the Nightbringer’s scythe and yet he came in seconds the moment she called to him cause nothing else mattered as soon as he heard her voice. When Elias realized Mauth had completely weakened his first reaction was to run to Laia and while she had been frozen haunted by realizing what she had done it was Elias who ran in front of the storm to get her away from it and nearly sacrificing his life in order to keep her safe. I mean HOW CAN I NOT FORGIVE HIM AFTER ALL THAT!? I couldn’t stop the emotions running through when he was able to finally meet his father. When he was able to see the life he could’ve had if war and pain hadn’t tainted it. Then his final strive to live. Him fully coming back as Elias Veturius and chanting Always Victorious to come back to the world of the living. It was everything! Elias has been a death magnet throughout this series. His whole has made his hands drenched in blood and making him live a life so dirty that he believes at many moments is a life that isn’t worth living anymore. That he’s too damaged. Too callous. Too tainted to be considered worthy of anything, but in the end when the time came he pushed to life. He fought to be more than his mistakes. To be more than a symbol of death. He chose to live. 

I will continue with the characters but here’s a short break to speak about my most prized possession: Elaia. So I already explained a good chunk in Elias’s snippet, but we ALL know they need their own portion for one to get their feelings out more clearly. Elias and Laia’s love as usual isn’t easy and broke me time and time again. One minute my heart flutters and I’m on the edge of my seat in hope and then the next it’s like I get a bucket of cold water dumped over my head. Their relationship was especially rough in the beginning. Elias pulled away consistently and though watching Laia try her hardest to break through was admirable it hurt all the more every time it failed. Yet even through all the hurt my heart still fluttered. The way she purposely said things, or did certain things, in order to get a rise out of him was such a delight to watch. Elias and his rocks ended with both Laia and I sad but I still can’t help how wholesome it felt to see them banter. Laia sitting on the boulder in the middle of his “workout”, him casually hoisting her over his shoulder, putting her down, and just to have her spring back up and follow him to continue the conversation. Who knew seeing two people talk about pets could get a giggle out of me. The last three hundred pages I’d say are the best. Cause this is when the Soul Catcher slowly begins to soften up. He lets himself care about Laia more. Lets himself get lost in her more. I had to put the book down after the mango scene just to catch my breath! I won’t lie and pretend I didn’t enjoy all the steamy scenes. I did and nearly fainted at every single one of them, but it was the soft moments between Soul Catcher and Laia that stood out the most. When she was sad and he’d hold her, the way he was so attached to the armlet that thought that he had lost it made him tear his cabin apart, when he went to find her to tell her to leave the waiting place but couldn’t help but stare at her instead, telling her he prefers being called Elias from her, still putting her first then then disguising it saying he is only doing it for his duty to the ghosts, and the way the old him springs up constantly whenever she’s around. Every little detail was a hit to the heart! Especially Laia telling Elias that he had no right to dictate her emotions. He has no right to tell her how to fell. She loves him and she finds him worthy of it and he cannot take that away. He can’t make her stop loving him. It was everything to see her always declaring how much she loved him seeing as she never got to at the end of Reaper. And now she won’t let him stop hearing it. Won’t let him not know it or forget it. Even their sex scene felt more than just steamy smut. It was so wholesome as they laughed together for the first time in a long time, the way he saw her as perfect, and by the end of it to have Laia speak about how she wanted everything with him forever. It made their ending all the more sweeter. I had made so many jokes before SKY about them finally being able to do it, about them practically being married, the wooden armlet being an engagement ring, and them being endgame and hoping that at least one of these would come true. Little did I know every single one would. Little did I know that the ending I have been hoping for but was 99% sure I’d never get was exactly what I’d get and more. Sabaa Tahir has truly spoiled me and I don’t deserve it but I will thank her a million times for it!

Next Character: Helene. Oh boy. Unpopular opinion but I had a strong dislike for Helene for a long time. I thank Sabaa for giving her a P.O.V. though. Cause without it all I and many others would see is colonizer and oppressor. Evil. Wrong. Wicked. I hated Helene in the first book. Tolerated her in the second. Found her likeable in the third. Then ultimately fell in love with her in the fourth. I found book 4 Helene to be the very best Helene she could be. Her finally letting her emotions break through is what ended up captivating me. Her scene as she slayed Karkauns all the while crying gave me chills in REAPER. THAT to me was strength . THAT was what reminded me as badass as Helene is she’s still human. She falters, she makes mistakes, she cries, she wins, she loses, and it isn’t power that ultimately drives her. For her too it is love. Love for family, love for friends, and love for her people. Her friendship with Laia made my heart bloom. I wish we could’ve had more of it! I also wish we could’ve seen it develop more but I also understand that this is the last book and I’d rather spend it seeing two queens getting along then bicker like they had been in the last three books. I loved watching them tease each other, them grin while talking about blasted men, Helene feeling like she can stand taller when Laia compliments her, and Laia ultimately being the first scholar to hail her as Empress. And all her fighting scenes!? BEST FIGHTING SCENES I’VE EVER READ! Helene is ruthless, she is brutal, she isn’t afraid to be stained in blood, and will defeat anyone in her way. I found myself so excited in my reread when I saw I was approaching those scenes. She is flawless in battle and I found myself completely entrapped by her. Slicing off heads, arms, and striding into every battle with her head held high. I was about ready to fight Harper to let her be with me instead! Her P.O.V.s had actually been my least favorite through book 2 and 3. Book 4 made me so happy that I got to go from chapter to chapter like: Oh yay! Laia! Oh yay Elias! Oh yay! Helene! I was able to be excited throughout the whole thing knowing each character was going to give me something good! Also I found her a lot funnier this time around! And Lord knows how I love my women bossy, sarcastic, and blunt.  I know a lot of people are angry about her ending. I was deeply saddened by it too. I used to think as a colonizer serves her right to lose everything! Why should I feel bad when she’s scoffed at the lives of the scholars and shrugged her shoulders at slavery for the longest time but of course that ended up biting me in the ass. I understand Sabaa’s reasoning. Helene has took for the longest time. So now it has come full circle for her to experience what that feels like for the other side. All those scholars who too lost a sister, brother, mother, father, and lover that she took away without a second glance when oppressing them. I loved that Sabaa protrays it in a way that before as someone who despised her, I can’t even be happy about it. Instead I am empty. Lost. Hurt. It shows all the more how useless war and vengeance is. We think more deaths and kills will make us feel better. It does not. Instead I found myself days later still haunted by what happened between her and Avitas. And now I wish nothing more but Helene to find happiness. To have more days laughing with Laia and reluctantly letting her braid her hair and dress her up. More teasing and reminiscing between her and her once best friend, Elias. And possibly something new and exciting and fulfilling with Musa. (Which I will touch on in it’s own paragraph haha)

Next: Avitas. Hmmm. Here’s the thing. I don’t hate Avitas. His moments with the shrike were meaningful and his presence is what ultimately led to breaking through her hard exterior. He taught Helene how to be just a girl again. How to feel without being weak. How love can be strength. I loved that he was able to bring out a more vulnerable side of her and show to her that it wasn’t a weakness. Every part of her is strong. Every part of her is beautiful. Every part of her he loves. That moment especially when she declares herself as broken and his eyes are wet with tears feeling for her. That he tells her being broken cannot stop her. It just makes her all the more of a force to reckon with. He was exactly what Helene needed in this time of war. Exactly what she needed to stay tethered to the world and faithful to herself. Sadly however I couldn’t get myself to connect with him. He was so reserved, so quiet, and so serious most of the time. It was hard to gather much from him. The little cracks of his demeanor whenever he was around Helene helped soften me. His fierce loyalty to her alone and understanding that a girl like her doesn’t need protection. She can very well take care of herself but it wasn’t about that. He just loved her too much to ever stop worrying. It ached something fierce within me. His death also haunted me for days and still does. Though I think it did hurt a little less cause I wasn’t attached to him. It was hard to considering how little I feel I still know about him and his thoughts and feelings. Plus his final scene with Elias at the waiting place brought me peace. He died for the person he loved and now he gets to reunite with his family. He wanted to leave and so he did. May Avitas Harper rest in peace and never be forgotten.

Next: Darin. His death ruined me. He was the sole purpose Laia went on this journey in the first place. He was the first person to always believe in her. He was the only family she (thought) she had left. He was one of Laia’s biggest fans and nothing else mattered more to him than her. He based so much of his life pushing Laia forward and encouraging her and getting her to laugh again even during the darkest of times. The way he pinched her cheeks before bidding her goodbye, the way he went back to find Laia and fight beside her, the way he teased her about Elias making the both of us laugh, and how even in his final moments before crossing over he wanted to know how his sister was doing. If she had won. Then being able to pass in peace proudly when he found out that she had. And his final words telling Elias that if there’s one person who can make up for all the love she’s lost it’s him. He will be missed greatly. So much so!

Next: Faris. Faris has been here since the beginning His last scene with the shrike also ruined me. I had to put the book down cause I was so hurt. Faris was a giant teddy bear always spewing jokes and being a clueless but brave boy. To see him go down like that though admirable still broke me nonetheless. Especially despite knowing a lot about them I loved him and Dex very much! I also thought maybe him and Livia could have their own happy ending, but I hoped too hard ):

Next: Livia. I bet you can guess this hurt very much as well. I loved Livia so much. She was such a powerful girl thrust into this world of politics and tyrants and held her own. My love first ignited in Reaper and only shined brighter in SKY. My jaw dropped and once again the book went down when Keris killed her. I was so broken. She was so full of life, witty, brave, sweet, and just as fierce as her sister. I wished she could’ve stayed!

Next: Musa. My FAVORITE secondary character in the whole series. Words cannot describe how much I love Musa and it saddens me to see that he is so underrated. Though I’m happy that even Sabaa says that he is one of her favorites! Musa was a light in every dark moment. I’m always a sap for handsome snarky sarcastic comedic relief characters with a tragic past. I loved that he was the one to always joke first despite how much he hurts. That he was the one always encouraging those around him to fight for love even though he lost his. I loved that he called Laia little sister and how his mere presence around her could make Elias go feral. Surprisingly most of all I loved his relationship with Helene.

Now here is yet another break from character talk to talk about another pair. Musa and Helene. I know it’s wrong. Helene had just lost Avitas and they are two broken people right now. But like said just for a moment, together, they make a whole. I never even thought of a possibility between the two. It felt so random. Awkward even. Though upon my reread I can see the little hints. Musa and Helene practically spend most of the book at each other’s side. They fight together, they encourage each other, they argue, and they see each other. Two people always putting on a brave face no matter how much they hurt. I was surprised to feel myself smiling at their bickering. Helene tends to be an uptight stoic person but around Musa she can’t help but smile and laugh as easy as it is to breathe. The way she endearingly considers him pretty. Around Musa she can’t help but talk about her feelings and him to her. The way she held his hand when they found out about Nikla’s death and how even when Harper went to talk to him he still wouldn’t let go of her. And their final scene together at the end of SKY. SO MANY FEELS! I CAN’T HELP THE FLUTTER OF HOPE I FEEL! Their bickering even cuter! Their vulnerability to each other even more powerful! All the while still respecting their past loves and understanding they can still mourn and yet live and strive for more. Absolutely perfect! Seeing Helene not close herself up after yet again losing in love was such a beautiful thing to me. Her telling Musa she’d like it if he stayed and him obviously happy about it but feigning arrogance instead is so him it only makes me love him more. Makes me love them more. Makes me hope! This could just be Sabaa testing the waters but Helene does still owe him a favor and I hope to the skies above Sabaa will be giving us that tale soon!

Next Character: Keris. I loved how she was handled as well. Learning about her past explained so much and yet erased nothing. I loved being able to learn more about her. I loved being able to see all the suffering she went through that we didn’t know about that turned shaped her into the cruel person she is today. How some of her actions still can’t be fully understood cause Keris herself probably doesn’t understand it either. I love that we are able to see her point of view and understand het and yet it’s plainly obvious that Keris has made her grave. Now it’s time for her to lie in it. It’s such a painful yet satisfying thing to see her reunite with her mother’s ghost. To be confronted by all her misdoings as Karinna looks at her in hope and then disdain upon seeing all the blood on her hands. From then she is unable to see her as her daughter leaving Keris ultimately alone and to confront all the wrongs she had cause to get to where she is. I felt it more fitting that Mirra killed her. Marcus is the one who took the Bloodshrike’s family away from her so it is only fair that Helene got to kill him. While Keris is the one who tortured Cook and her family. Forced Mirra’s hand to kill her own family just so they won’t have to suffer under Keris anymore. So it felt right to me that Mirra finally got to have the last word. I also loved how Mirra was able to take away all of Keris’s pain until she was reduced to nothing but a girl again before she was tainted. Then ultimately passed on. I found this a incredibly satisfying end to her arc.

Lastly: Mirra. I LOVED that Mirra was able to come back. I LOVED that Sabaa wasn’t cruel enough to leave Laia alone. Since Helene had baby Zacharias. Elias has Quin. Laia would’ve had no one. And I loved that Elias and Helene teared up also happy to see that Laia still had one person left. I loved that cook admits to her faults and how broken she herself is. How vengeance took over her and led her astray. But there is no one she loves more in this world than Laia. That she will fight everything and anyone just to ensure Laia will have a place in this world. I also loved her sense of humor. Had me cackling when she demanded Mauth to come talk to her and when she casually calls Elias her son in law. I loved her teaming up with the Bloodshrike! I love the big reveal leading up to it. It was all just so perfect for me!

In conclusion: Do I have my criticisms? Yes. There are a few things I wish to change. I thought Keenan was mentioned too much in the beginning. I found their relationship especially in book 2 very unhealthy so to hear her mention it and him as something to miss made me quite uncomfortable. Though I suppose it’s also just the thought of missing an ally and a friend cause there was a time where she had no one but Keenan to rely on. I wish we could’ve had more Helene and Laia scenes! Seeing her smile in a long time because Elias and Laia had their happy ending did wonders to my soul! I wish we could’ve had more scenes of Elias, Laia, and Helene all working together. I wish we could’ve had more scenes of Elias and Laia fighting side by side. Especially since I’ve always wanted scenes of them fighting together. The ones we got in SKY were EVERYTHING! I just wish we could’ve had more of that instead of them walking in the forest and pages of him being cold to her. I wish Avitas and Elias could’ve bonded more. To see them two be so reserved and yet so happy to be able to meet was such a gift. And yet they only fully spoke in two scenes ): I wish Darin and Laia got to spend more time together. I wish Laia could’ve gotten more scenes with her scythe. Or that we could’ve gotten more scenes of Laia with her bow and arrows. However these are minor things and do not take away much from my overall feeling for this book. 

Which is I am in love with this book. It is my new favorite book of all time. Of any other book ever. I think it is the best book in the series and the fact that Sabaa is so proud of it and says it’s the best book she ever wrote. I can’t help but agree and give A Sky Beyond The Storms a sky full of stars. The ending is everything I’ve ever wanted and so much more. It makes saying goodbye hurt less knowing my faves are alive, happy, and have finally found a place to call home. I love that we end off on Elias and Laia getting engaged and walking off to get ready to start a new life together. I couldn’t of asked for a better ending. Sabaa really outdid herself and I hope she gets all the praise and all the awards for this divine book and her flawless story telling. Truly one of the best Kehannis out there ❤️

[the-silver-peahen-residence]

||Playing a game||

You know why this is here. Yeah, drabble time. However, again NSFW warning. If you don’t like, please don’t read.

Akane akumushi belongs to me

Blanche Santos belongs to @multi-ocs-hangout

With that said, grammar not good but just wrote for fun. Thanks a bunch.

She was just done cracking her knuckles when beating up a thug leader that was bothering Blanche. However, she scared them off with her strength so they were back home.

‘You okay Blanche?’

‘Y..yes, I’m fine. Thank you my queen.’ he sees her smile happily kissing his cheek when he blushes from that.

‘No problem. I just wanna be sure you are safe. Either way, serves them jerks right for wanting to hurt you. I’ll always be here to protect you.‘ she sees him blush but nods while they were walking him.

‘So, to reward you. I wanna do something special for you. Were gonna play a little game.’

‘Special? A game?’

‘Yep. It’s a reward for at least helping me out with the thugs so...you don’t mind do you? It’s just a simple please like game. You ask for something as I’ll do it as long as you say please.’ she said smiling to Blanche that he felt his face flush pink. He didn’t mind if it was with his mistress. He even sees her looking all happily to him.

‘Really? Anything as long as I say please?’

‘Yep. So wanna try?’

‘Well...I don’t mind if it’s with you my queen....I don’t mind.’ he said as Akane smiled sweetly.

‘Thank you Blanche. I even got a cute collar for you too but if the game gets too rough forgive alright?’ he saw her smile that she touches his cheeks looking at her. His eyes meets with her as they gaze upon one another.

‘S..sure....you can do whatever you like with me, my queen. I trust you...’

What he didn’t know is that she plans to. True, the game went well with him getting cuddles, kisses, and head pets. However, the game got hotter when he begins asking for her touch, her fingers touching his hole, even making out. The game indeed shifted to something more...exciting.

Like right now. Akane was in a dark room sitting up while thrusting her fingers into Blanche’s wet dripping hole, watching him sucking one of her Naga length as they swell. He was so precious being a good boy for his queen.

“Such a good sweet precious pet. You really know how to please me so well and your playing the game really good too.” she sees him licking one of her lengths and stroking the other as he feels her fingers thrusting into his clenching hole. He already had some big toys and vibrators inside of his ass leaving him a wet mess. He groans feeling her rub against his cheek seeing him flushed.

“M..mistress....please, it aches. I can’t..” he feels her stroke his head hearing a whine coming from her pet.

“Shhhhh..I know. You need to have something in this hole of yours but you have to make me feel good first. I already helped you my dear gem....it’s already throbbing wanting you too.” he gulps feeling her lengths swell even more as he was slurping and licking against it. He saw Akane already wanting to take him for herself but she remembers the game.

“Now if you want something else, just ask. You have to be sure you say please alright. Now..what else dose my cute little gem wish from his queen hmm?” she sees him licking her again but his eyes was dazed in arousal.

“My queen, I wanna s..suck your hot length...I need to please you..”

“You didn’t say the magic word dear..”

“*panting* P..Please....fuck, please I wanna......suck your cock...”

“Heh, good boy..go ahead. If you do well, I might let you have your reward.” Seeing Blanche whine, he adjusted him self and slowly takes her length down his mouth hearing a loud moan from her. It felt so big but he didn’t stop pleasuring her. Anything for his queen. She heard his lustful slurping noises that he was stroking her as well. Blanche wanted to make her feel good so she would reward him for being a good pet.

He kept his eyes shut, making sure not to cut her with his fangs while hearing Akane moan happily in her Naga form. “MMmmm good boy. Such a good boy...”

His face heated up hearing the praise that he keeps going leaving them wet and ready in case he would get his present. He keeps moving his head, pleasuring his queen to his best ability that he feels it throb ready to burst. Before it could, he feels her pull his head back as her load hits his face. He gasps hanging his tongue hanging out but Akane smiled pulling Blanche into her lap so he could see her throbbing cocks wanting him. He squirms where she held him but adjusted him to have one rub against his hole.

“M..My queen?”

“I think it’s time for your reward. You been so good to me, I figure why not? I think I’ve teased you enough..don’t you think?” she grinds against Blanche’s ass cheeks hearing him moan when it felt hot. He knew it was be good but grips the sheets resting in his hands.

He even spreads his ass for his queen to show her. Licking her lips, Akane stops to have one of the tips poke his hole before getting ready. “Alright love. Take a deep breath and...” She saw him breath in before slamming her cock inside. He moans out with eyes widen tongue hanging out as he came hard on the bed. It felt so big that he shook from under her.

“So tight my dear gem. You really are so good.” he feels her nuzzling into his shoulder while she hears him moan feeling how big and swollen his stomach was.

“S..so big. My queen, your stretching my h..hole so much~”

She smiled seeing his lustful expression before starting to thrust into him. The sounds of the room changed with the bed squeaking and Blanche’s moans of pleasure. It felt good to have his queen fill him up. Even more with the other length rubbing against his back. He wanted to make her feel good but himself as well.

He moans drooling on the bed but he felt his face covered while she moans herself making her pet feel good. However, the heated sensations grew that she suddenly hard thrusts to grab his hips making him cry out.

“My hole. It’s getting destroyed from my queen’s cock. It feels way too good. I don’t want to pass out but..she’s showing no mercy towards me. I might break~” he feels her holding him close still he gasps feeling his chest rubbed and pecs squeezed.

“W...wait, my queen not my pecs..p..please their..” she didn’t listen to him but kept going on, leaning his head back moaning out to the night that she wanted to hear. She wanted him to feel pleasure unlike anything he’s felt before. He panted feeling his body move and his cock twitching ready to cum. He tries to warn her but she held him down still quickening her thrusts.

“I’m close my gem. No worries, I’ll be sure to fill you up good. You want your queen to fill you up with her love?”

“Ahh y..yes. I want my queen’s love. Please fill my hole with every drop of your love! Please!!!”

“Alright love...I’ll fill you so much, you’ll be filled to the brim.” his tone changed rapidly feeling her hitting deep but she hears him moaning and screaming out in pleasure curling his toes.

“It feels too good. I’m gonna cum...cumming cumming cumming....” he grips onto her arms feeling her pounding away before he feels her slam him down hard filling his hole with her cum. He screams with tongue hanging out, cumming himself over his chest and face as she was bloating his stomach.

He twitches feeling himself full with his eyes half way open and tongue hanging out. Her cock was still inside of his hole but she carefully lifts him up feeling her cock slip out. He gasped when her seed dribbles out of his hole to feel her kissing his neck.

“Good boy. So good..” she praises him while Blanche panted feeling his body full with hot love. “You know, you really are amazing dear and for another reward. I’ll let you have a turn with me. You better be sure to punish me well alright?” he blinks blushing from the new reward that he groans feeling stroking his stomach.

“Y..yes my queen. I’ll be sure t..to enjoy my reward w..well..” he said that they shared a kiss but she was careful with him. As she always was.

[yawninginf]

Fade: Childish Ch.1

Summary of series: Wind feels he doesn’t fit in because of his age. He just needs an oportunity to prove his worth to the others, and himself.

Notes: Look at that I wrote a second fanfic! I’m sorry it’s not the sequel ti Instict cause I just couldn’t get it flow. Let’s just hope I manage finish this series. Expect grammar/vocabulary mistakes cause English is not my native language, typoes etc. If you bother to read this and spot a mistake while doing so, please correct me.

Warnings: blood description, death (but not death), very little minor angst

Universe by @linkeduniverse

◇•◇•◇•◇•◇

Wind is upset.

He feels burried under a ton of worries, questions troubling his mind and lots, lots of anger. He can’t seem to stay still. He wanders around the camp, picking up random rocks and throwing them into the campfire that is slowly turning small branches as well as large pieces of wood into ashes.

He prefers not to look at Hyrule, or his glare will fall onto the head wound he carries and is still pulsing pain into him because of Wind.

The injured hero is sitting on a fallen tree log covered in wild mushrooms and dark moss, surrounded by plenty of ancient, towering oak trees. A bandage stained with mud is poorly wrapped around his scalp and the dried blood makes his tuffs of hair glue together in an unpleasant way. His hairstyle is messy, there are hairs dyed red from the blood that has fallen onto them and mixed with dirt and dust. His expression gives out the rough day he’s been through, but that doesn’t stop a faint smile from forming on his face when he sees the youngest hero.

Wind sighs in annoyance, trying to get away from the guilt and nausea stiring up his stomach. It isn’t his fault the rest of the group always assumes he needs to be pampered.

◇•◇•◇•◇•◇

“Wind watch out!” An ambush. Nothing more than a few bokoblins and even less moblins. Piece of cake. It should hage been. “I’m fine-I’m fine I swear!” Wind is in the middle of a bokoblin gang, three or four of them staring aggressively at him and softly but threateningly tapping their wooden clubs on the back of their ugly hands. Wind doesn’t wait for them to strike.

He sprints towards the biggest of them who seems to be their chief and lets out a loud clear battlecry. With his increased speed he raises his sword and is ready to stab the flesh of the vicious creature but it turns to the side just before the fatal strike lands at it’s target. Wind stumbles upon the gap in front of him and uses all of his strengh to keep his balance, dangerously leaning to the front. He is about to sigh in relief when he hears the floppy footsteps of the creatures a breath away from him. A raised bokoclub, he turns to try and reflect the hit but he knows he can’t manage on time.

Hyrule is nearby. He doesn’t hesitate to try and protect his younger friend. He runs, not being aware of his surrounding, not hearing Wind’s unfinished protest against his action. Time stops as he falls to the ground, drifting a scared Wind below him.

The bokoblin lowers it’s weapon and it’s mark is now Hyrule’s head. It goes down with a hollow thud and red blood starts to ooze from the wound.

Hyrule feels dizzy. The world beside him starts to shake and he can’t keep his eyes open. He feels stinging pain pulsing from the side of his head and a sudden heat has taken over the upper side of his body. His lips are trembling and when his look falls on the scratched but unharmed Wind, he fades away, closing his eyes.

“Please….I won’t forgive you if you die on me” a whisper and Wind’s terrified, panicked face meets with his injured friend’s. He doesn’t have time to care for the injury since the monsters are still threatening their lives. He turns his head up and realises with terror that he has lost his sword.

Warriors is the nearest to them and as Wind sends his glare up to him, he is already pulling his blade out of the dead body of the last bokoblin. Everyone pays their attention to the badly injured Hyrule quietly sleeping on Wind’s lap. Blood is everywhere; on Hyrule’s hair, on Wind’s clothes, even on the ground and the club that did the damage.

“QUICK!…..HELP HIM!” shouts Wind with a cracked voice and immidiately looks down at his friend, then at the vast amount of blood on his hands, feeling terror and a glimpse of disgust at the same time.

Warriors kneels down by them and checks Hyrule’s pulse, the rest of the heroes running towards them, showered in worry. “Is he…” Legend says with a low tone, afraid to let out the words.

“No. But he will if we don’t get him a red potion right now. He’s lost a lot of blood.”

Sky rummages through their stuff and relievingly takes out a glass bottle with a red liquid inside. It has something…magical in it and you can tell by giving it a simple look. You can’t explain it. As you watch the liquid flow in harmonic circles inside the bottle, form assymetrical waves and move like a dancing fairy, a creature made by pure magic, ready to take away all of your pain. Observing it feels like the soft soothing by a mother to her child, it’s gentle movements wash away every worry, they relax every tense muscle of your body.

Hand by hand the bottle is passed down Time’s grasp and with the help of Four he pours the healing potion into the limb mouth of the fallen hero. He subconsiously gulps it down his throat and his breathing immidiately becomes easier.

He mumbles something like an ancient saying in his sleep, then suddenly opens his eyes wide and stares at Wild. His eyes become slits from the pain as his palm touches his wound. He makes an effort to get up and before he can collapse to his knees, Wind pusses him up from his armpits and along with Sky they support his weight until he is ready to count on his own legs. “I’m okay” he says “I just need to wash the blood off, and a bandage…”

◇•◇•◇•◇•◇

Wind ignores the gesture politely ment for him because the back of his mind is always returning to the morning battle. He sould have been quicker. And they should have let him take the blow. Why was acceptable for Hyrule to be injured and not for Wind? “Like I haven’t been hurt before” he murmurs under his breath and soon the cook of the group catches his attention.

Wind watches as Wild makes their lunch, a soup made of garlic, boar meat, carrots and….other ingredients he isn’t able to identify. He looks so absorbed into what he’s doing, and the way he lovingly stirs the soup in the pot gives out his passion for cooking. This is the only time his characteristics seem to be relaxed and his muscles not tense. He expertly knows exactly what to add in the pot, when, how and the right amound of it. After a while Wild notices the young pirate’s soft glare pinned on him. He feels confused for just a second, then gifts Wind with an akward, yet pure smile, coming right from the depths of his finally calm soul.

The pirate continues walking around the place their camp is set. On the corner of his eye he can spot Time and Twilight practicing with their swords further at the nearby glade, showered by the light of the midday sun.

A peacefull feeling, able to break into the hearts of the coldest soldiers. A gentle breeze softly moves the leaves to the direction of the dense forest, all tints of green mixing together in a feast of nature. Bright and long grass turns golden under the sunrays randomly falling onto the petals of the prettiest flowers one has ever seen. They say an image is worth a thousand words. A pity Wind doesn’t care for words at this moment. He lets the two related heroes bond together without being interrupted and walks away, taking his moody disposition with him.

Every occasion the other heroes had shown their disbelief that he can manage what they can, comes to his mind as a blury memory, for his brain has found the perfect time to mess with him and play games. He can’t control it.

He tries to get his attention elsewhere–ah, Four is just coming back from the deep of the forest, carying a bunch of cut tree branches that will be used to keep the campfire lit for Wild to cook.

The weather surrounding their camp may be all nice and lovely, but their destination is covered in thick fog and dark mist, so they aren’t moving forward yet.

Four is struggling under the weight of the wood on his hands and is tilting right and left while he’s walking, as if he is about to fall every second.

Wind’s eye shines, the thought of being helpfull washes his pondering away. He starts walking towards the shortest hero, eager to help as he can. He is cut midways by a running Sky that offers a helping hand to Four. “No thank you-I-I don’t need help but it’s kind of y–” he trips over an anomaly on the ground and the hero of the sky grabs him on time to not fall face flat on the dirt.

Unfortunately or not, the branches he was carrying don’t avoid that fate and slip off his hold with a loud thud. As Four turns to face a bright-smiled-Sky and thank him, Wind is brought back to his misery.

◇•◇•◇•◇•◇

“We need more wood to last us until we start venturing again” Time announces, “any volunteers?” Wind felt more excited than ever to bring the resources back to the camp. He raised his hand up, feeling restless as he put his weight on one foot then the other playfully, imperceptibly hopping from his desire to make himself usefull.

Time looks around in unsatisfactory. Everyone has an excuse to not take the task and so far Wind is the only one available, his eyes faintly screaming “me, me!”. Time sighs and is about to announce Wind the responsibility of the chore when Four puts himself in. “Wind can keep his rest. I’m sure he is tired from the fight.”

“But I–”

“It’s okay, I’ll go. I don’t have anything important to do either way.”

Wind crosses his arms and huffs in annoyance. His breath blowing out of his mouth drifts some of his bang hairs out of the way but they come back at their original place right after.

He accepted it. Partially. Although now, it all makes sense to him. In the back of his head, he always has a suspicion that the others find him too young and a fear that, maybe, they’re right. Now he considers it’s all clear. But he will prove them wrong eventually.

“Right?”

◇•◇•◇•◇•◇

Dawn. Everyone is gathered around the campfire, its light seemingly becoming brighter as the colours of the sky begin to fade, taking their last form before nightfall. The majority of the clouds are dyed in a breathtaking way by the setting sun; shades of pink, like the petals of a young rose, darker in some parts and even velvet red in others. The whole sky has surrendered its light blue colour to an orange tint that makes you feel as if you were living inside a dream you wish you wouldn’t wake up from. It feels like observing the life of another being from a far away realm, like dwelling on a parallel universe.

“Technically, we are” Wind points out to himself in an imaginary, sarcastic tone and he feels nausious out of a sudden. He feels moving in all directions, as in a mysterious dance that shakes every bit of his existence. Glaring at a wide eyed Warriors swallowing earlier than he should have done, at Wild tripping over nothing and his bangs moving like choochoo jelly when he manages to get up, at Four as the sword he was inspecting slips through his hands, at Legend cursing under his cut by the seizures breath, at Sky supporting his body by pushing his belly and looking ready to throw up any moment now, at Time and Twilight sending looks of agreement to eachother, he knows he is not losing his mind. It is shaking, just not in the way an earthquake would. Not in the way the sea would move his ship, had it wanted to shake the life out of every member of his crew. No, the place around them still seems as peacefull as a graveyard near the time the sun should start its journey to the top of the morning sky.

They’re changing worlds.

Again.

The beautiful view of the sunset changes to that of the pitch dark, starless night, earlier than it should have, the colours fade more quickly than normal. The trees fall even though they are still proudly standing skyward, the ground is on fire even though the grass and wildflowers remain unharmed.

And suddenly, it starts to rain. Peacefull are the salty droplets, they follow gently one another until they reach their landing spot and meet with falling petals of the blooming nature that were lifted to the sky by the whole process. Wind looks around in surprise. His mouth opens widely, slowly, without being ordered to, as he realises they are still at the same Hyrule. He directs his head to the others and their expression is as troubled and surprised as he feels. “Is it over yet?” the younger hero thinks and a tint of hope brightens his eyes.

He of all people should have known.

It’s calm before the storm.

There’s a fallen tree log covered by various mushrooms, a lot of them could kill you if you attempted to make them your next and presumably last meal. They all subconsiously look at it like they have just witnessed the destruction of the most precious treasure to be guarded in the deepest and most secure place in all of Hyrule.

And just when their eyes are settled on the log, it happens. The sky seems to tear open in a deafening sound not easy to be defined and starts to pour all the mass of water Wind’s Hyrule would offer for the fish to live and the sailors to travel.

Thunder strikes right on the tallest tree in the whole forest, cracking it open just as an apple would be torn in two pieces after you cut it with a decent knife. The Links all flinch back at the sight and their shocked gasps can be heard echoing all over the place.

Wind tries to gulp his fear away but he just can’t escape the panic forming on his face, he can’t slow down his ever increasing heartbeat. With his eyes he searches for a way out of the storm, a way to stop the shivers running down his spine.

Another sharp lightning tears the sky. It doesn’t fade in the horizon, it travels all the way to the more and more unstable ground, it lands a breath away from a hyperventilating Wind and the sock makes the pirate fall to the earth.

“WIND!” He hears a worried cry from one of his friends, he is too afraid and shocked to find who the voice belongs to.

The youngest hero crawls a few steps back and with panic he turns his head, realising the others are slowly turning into dust. Wild is layed on the ground, his hands reaching out and slowly vanishing and leaving a hole where they should have been. Twilight is kneeling beside him, staring at his trembling fingers, slowly turning into dust soon to be caried away with the raging gusts of the wind.

Four glares at the little left of him, his arms and legs are gone, his torso starts decaying as well, the spots his parts once started are covered in mist and dust, spreading all over his body like an infection. He looks up to Hyrule running towards him. His eyes have nothing left of the courageous hero he thought he was.

“FOUR!!” Hyrule screams in despair watching as the last bit of his friend’s existence fades away. “No…no no no, NO!” This can’t be happening. Not to them, not now, not so quickly.

He looks around. Time is now starting to go through the process. Twilight is gone. Wild, Four, gone. Wind is still on the ground when finally he gets up seeking for help and decides that Warriors’ protective arms are the closest to safety.

Wind is sobbing now, not because he is afraid to go, he is just afraid to let go of his new friends, his family.

“Why..?”

The rest?

They fade too.

◇•◇•◇•◇•◇

The pirate feels like falling.

He is falling and he lands hard as well.

He looks around him. He sees the others. They have some bruises and scratches and most are rubbing their head.

“Are we…dead?” He mutters seemingly confused and scared.

Wouldn’t they not feel pain if they were dead though?

“I–I don’t think so.” Twilight replies.

Wind stays silent and makes an effort to get up. He shoves the dirt off his pants ignoring the stinging he feels from the various scratches all over his body.

Just like everyone else, the youngest hero looks around in awe and tangled emotions. They haven’t died, they have just moved to another world. Nobody seems to recognise this place and address it as his Hyrule. It doesn’t feel like Hyrule at all. The trees are few and odd, they look like none the heroes have ever seen, or every one of the species combined.

The Links are trying their best to understand what has just happened, without success. Whispers and theories are exchanged but the pieces do not seem to stick together.

“Anyhow, wherever we are at the moment, we can’t be assured that the inhabitants are not hostile nor that there aren’t monsters lurking in the corners of this world.” Time lectured, implying they should not be caught off guard. At the sound of the eldest’s voice, everyone stood quiet.

“Now, check your stuff and what we lack. Cherish your wounds and ready yourselves; we have some exploring to do.”

[ahiddenpath]

Seven Years of Writing Fanfics

I’m being a little premature- I’ll celebrate seven years of writing as ahiddenpath in September- but I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what I’ve learned.  Please read on if you want to hear about the writing habits I wish I had when I started in 2012, and about the habits I wish I didn’t have back then!

I’ll also be talking about my writing plans in general.  Check it out below the cut!

1.)  Make a story bible.

A story bible is a reference document for your story.  Before you post a new fic, I strongly suggest creating one.  For digimon specifically, this means making some choices before you begin:

Which version of the character names will you use?  Do you intend to remain consistent with this choice?  For example, I’ve seen a lot of writers use Japanese character names and English digimon names.  Will you use official honorifics?  Custom honorifics?  Will you use terminology from one translation of the show, or a mashup?

Make these choices upfront, create reference charts, and remain consistent.  

After that, you can also keep references for topics such as characterization details (if you say that Bob’s favorite drink is coffee in one chapter and tea twenty chapters later, be prepared for a flood of comments pointing out the inconsistency), setting details, and anything that you don’t want to forget.  Spending half an hour hunting down a silly detail instead of writing is a huge bummer.

Growing Up with You is my worst offender of ‘problems a story bible would have fixed.’  It’s got... every issue you can imagine, lol!  For example, pairing Hikari with Gatomon (instead of Tailmon), using ‘digitama��� and ‘digimental’ interchangeably in the 02 arc, using the English terms for evolution stages while using Japanese names for other things, confusing Bakemon and Bakumon, it’s a mess.  It’s so bad that a complete, painstaking edit is the only thing that can fix it...  Which is enough to make me weep, given that the story is over 400K words long.

Organize yourself before you start.  Here’s a link to some printable Digimon Adventure and Digimon Adventure 02 references.

2.)  Avoid Longfics.

I know I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating.  NEVER PUBLISH A NEW STORY WITHOUT HAVING AN ENDING IN SIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING.

I’m not saying you can’t write huge, epic tales.  God knows I’m unlikely to stop doing that.  But, if I could go back in time, I would separate Growing Up with You into four fics.  It would be something like this:

Growing Up with You I: Childhood

Growing Up with You II:  Digimon Adventure

Growing Up with You III:  Liminal Space

Growing Up with You IV:  Digimon Adventure 02

I’m sure some arcs would be longer than others, but this way, I’d have four stories that are roughly 100K words long.  

A lot of folks just... don’t want to read a 400K story.  It’s intimidating, man!  Although it varies by genre, the average word count for a fiction novel aimed at adults is 80K words.  That 400K fic is like FIVE NOVELS, DUDE!!!!  That’s a commitment for readers!

Shorter stories are more reader friendly, but there’s also a huge benefit to you, the writer.  Separating your longfic into multiple stories allows you more opportunities to write towards an ending.  Breaking your story into digestible chunks decreases the writing paralysis that comes with being nowhere near the ending.  It also cuts back on meandering chapters that don’t carry the narrative closer to that ending.  Furthermore, thinking of the story in arcs before you start writing forces you to plan more...  Something I never did in 2012!!!!

Best of all, once you reach the end of an arc, you can take a break before launching the next one.  It’s hard on a writer to continue endlessly producing without a break.  It’s hard on a reader to hit the final available chapter in a fic and wonder if it will ever update again.  But if you complete an arc and take a break to plan and write a few buffer chapters, the tension and impatience is gone for your audience, and you get to breathe.  It’s a win-win!

3.)  Avoid long chapters.

Back in 2012, I often posted chapters that were 10K words and longer!  Here are some benefits to posting shorter updates more frequently:

-Shorter wait times between updates.

Let’s say your planned chapter is 15K words long.  I could update my story once in the span of a month, or I could break the chapter into three parts and update three times in a month!  This keeps readers happy and interested in your work.

Over time, you’ll develop the ability to create sub arcs/movements, finding spots to break them up into separate updates.  This also creates natural moments for cliffhangers, tension, and mini resolutions.  It’s a great way to insert more moods and movement into your narrative.    

-More exposure for your story.

Every time you update your fanfic, it gets pushed to the top of the update list on fanfiction.net or AO3.  The more you update it, the more hits your story will receive, thanks to all the extra time it will spend on the first page of newly-updated fics.

-Easier editing.

I do my best editing when I’m working with 5K words or fewer at a time.  Personally, I can only focus on close editing for about 90 minutes before I start missing mistakes and forgetting details.  I could edit a 10K word update in two sittings, but then it’s possible to forget about details and moods from the previous editing session!  So, unless your story bible is really hardcore, your editing process could benefit from shorter updates.

-More feedback/support

I have a few amazing readers who leave some form of feedback/appreciation for me whenever I post a new chapter.  A supported writer is a happy, productive writer!  More updates means more chances for feedback and support from your readers, which in turn can fuel and direct your writing!  Again, everyone wins!  (Thanks, guys, I love you!).

4.)  Publish your story on both fanfiction.net and AO3.

Why reach one audience when you could potentially reach two?  There are plenty of readers who only use one platform or the other.

At this point, it would be ridiculously difficult to post my 70+ chapter fanfics to AO3...  Do yourself a favor and post to both from the start!

5.)  Remember: writing and editing are two separate processes.

Guys guys guys guys guys.  Lemme be real here.

I used to painstakingly write a first draft, check for spelling/grammar errors on my word processor, and then post it.

Here’s what my process looks like now: word vomit a first draft, do an edit in my word processor, print the edited draft, make edits on paper, transfer edits to word processor, print new draft, make edits on paper, transfer edits to word processor, final read through, post

If my new method looks more time intensive...  In a way, it is, but in a way, it isn’t?  I bang out that first rough draft without a care in the world, where I used to agonize over every word.  Agonizing is not fun.  Word vomiting can produce some, ah, discouraging results, but it feels like creative play.  It’s fun, it’s flexible, it’s fast...  And you can fix it later through the magic of editing.  And if you’re having fun, you’ll keep writing.  If you’re agonizing, you’ll find yourself making excuses to avoid writing.

Plus, my current method produces tighter, more deliberate prose, while maintaining the freedom and energy of word vomiting...  And avoiding the angst and doubt.  This is my best defense against writing paralysis and my greatest weapon in the battle of producing words.

My method can’t be right for everyone, but I do encourage you to try it out, especially if your writing hasn’t been joyful lately.

6.)  Don’t run too many fics at one time.

I encourage writers to have one longer fic open and one shorter fic, preferably of different tones/settings/main characters.  This gives you a way to keep writing when you’re sick of one project without bogging you down.

You will likely have some readers who love everything you do (god bless), but many people have particular genre, character, and setting preferences.  If you have three fics open, then readers of any one story have to wait much longer for the next update while you alternate updating each fic.

And more importantly, having a ton of open stories just...  It feels heavy, guys.  It’s a weight, a pressure.  Trust me.  Forgive me, fanfic gods, for I have sinned.

7.)  Maintain a buffer

Okay, so my Nanowrimo project for 2018 was to write 50,000 words for After August, my current open fic.  By the end of the month, I had a roughly 80% complete first draft of the entire fic.  

Guys!  Guys!  It’s so cool to know exactly where the story is going, from start to finish.  My editing is so deliberate on this piece!  I can spot repetition and inconsistencies, since the draft is printed and sitting in front of me in a binder.  I can tweak emphasis and maintain more balance between character appearances.  It’s a whole new ballpark for me, someone who always wrote one update at a time and posted it upon completion (or worse, wrote ahead and lost the material when I changed my mind about the plot before reaching that future point).

Plus, even if my life gets extra busy or hard, I can still maintain my updating schedule.  I can print out a chapter, take it to work, and do hard edits during my lunch break (I realize that makes me antisocial, but have you ever endured coworkers telling you all of their problems while you try to eat a sandwich in peace?  The editing is much more fun.  I am antisocial, is what I’m saying.  Born into it, baby).

Regular updates are a big part of maintaining steady readership, so having a buffer both increases the quality of your work (since you know where the story is going for sure) and ensures that more people read it.  Awww yisssss.

Okay, well, my concentration is gone now, so that’s the end of my advice!  If I think of anything else, maybe I’ll add it?  

I do want to touch base with my writing plans, though.  Currently, of course, my goal is to complete After August.  If I can post one chapter per week, it will be compete in early March, but I’m going to aim for completing the story in May, to allow for any issues that might come up (for example, Kingdom Hearts III is coming out soon!).

After that, I want to complete Seeking Resonance...  Although I have no idea how long that will take?  I just know that the heavy atmosphere was really starting to weigh on me.

After that... Well, do you remember that survey I made a while back?  It looks like my next project should probably be completing Four Years.  

I might simultaneously work on one of these two stories and Tales of REM, or maybe I’ll alternate between SR and FY for a while?  To be honest, though, I would really like to wrap up SR as soon as I can.

Either way, completion is the name of the game this year.  Please look forward to it!  Let me know if you have any ideas for future fics, or if you have a favorite from my list of potential future projects!

[srawesleyghuewrites]

More Than Anything - Chapter One

For desktop users: masterlist

For mobile users: mobile masterlist

Pairing: Zig x MC(Samantha Davis)

Faceclaim: Santiago Segura as Zig Ortega, Shay Mitchell as Samantha Davis, Cheddar as their puppy and Charlie as their cat

Book: The Senior

Word Count: ~ 1,800

Rating:  M for language

Prompt:  

They talked about traveling, made big plans while tangled in bed and even wrote an itinerary together but an opportunity presents itself and Zig finds himself with a decision to make. 

Samantha’s life has been a mess the last few weeks, her anxiety always getting the best of her, the thesis slowly becoming something so stressing to even explain, her parents spliting up, Zig’s sudden interest in traveling to Japan and her own mind playing tricks with her. So maybe that’s not a very good time for him to tell her? Or is the hard truth always the best option?

Author’s Note:

HI GUYS!!!

BTW I KNOW I’M LATE BUT I HAD REASONS(MY THESIS)

How are you? SOOOOO, this is a new series where the whole Japan thing is trated in a very different way but don’t worry, the drama is still here! I don’t have much to say about it because I honestly don’t know how many chapters and stuff but anyway..I can only say:

ANGST ALERT!

I don’t know exactly who to tag so please tell me if you want in or out of this taglist, and I hope everybody enjoys it!!!! As always, forgive my mistakes since english is not my mother language

@zigortega4life, @lizeboredom , @debramcg1106, @drakewalkerstan, @the-everlasting-dream, @christopher-powell, @pilitella, @easyobsession, @countrymusicandncis-blog, @tacohead13, @maxwellsgang, @ziggypop, @agent-bossypants, @angstymarshmallow

Disclaimer: The characters don’t belong to me,  I just borrow them from Pixelberry! 

Wine and Insomnia

Zig's been working since the early morning, his white shirt painted with a bunch of coffee stains showing the distraction overwhelming his senses, reminding him of when she asked him why the choice of such a bold color in a place where you're bound to get dirty. He remembers the dilated pupils of Samantha with his answer and a smirk, hoping to see her in this happy and light state soon enough. But the news he has to tell her might have the opposite effect, making her sink even more in the anxiety she’s currently fighting.

After his shift ended and the last stubborn client walked away at 1:34 in the morning, he said goodbye with a wave to the poor manager who was still closing some tabs and rushed out of the coffee shop. The streets were not completely empty, to his surprise, many students passed across the campus, heading to what seems to be parties or late night bars. It's a comforting presence, even if most of them are already drunk morons, it reminds him of how funny Sam gets when she’s drunk and all the stories they share in this very campus.

Meanwhile

Samantha typed fastly on her computer, the words already blurring together as the night extends for hours and hours. There's a big sigh coming from her as soon as her relentless fingers stop working, reading the nonsense crap she just wrote.

She's been feeling like that for a while, the inspiration coming fast in the middle of the night and escaping through her fingers before she can type anything useful. Samantha believes this might have something to do with everything that's been happening in her life lately, but Cheddar stops her from thinking any further in the subject by sitting next to her in the couch. He rests his paws on her exposed lap, calling out for attention as his puppy eyes shine over the almost dark room.

It's impossible for her not to scratch behind his ears and say in the most ridiculously dorky voice:

“You're the cutest dog in the whole world, did you know that? Who's the cutest dog in the world??”

He makes a confused expression by raising his ears and Samantha chuckles while scratching his jaw affectionately.

“Yes, you are!!! Cheddar is the cutest dog eveer!”

She feels better just with his presence, as if the emptiness he left in the apartament disappears for a moment. However the white document open in her computer brings her back to the task at hand, making her head pound heavily again.

Cheddar seems to notice the weight on her, laying his head lazily over his paws quietly as if not to disturb her. Samantha writes a full paragraph this time, full of grammar mistakes and gibberish but still feels better than nothing, that is until her eyes shift to the opening door and then nothing else seems that important anymore

...

The apartment is quiet and from the street he saw the living room fairy lights were on, which could mean that she left those on because she thought he was coming home soon or that she's still awake. Zig knows it's more likely the second option, with her insomnia crisis getting worse every week into the semester, but he still wishes badly that it'll be the first option.

When he opens the door his eyes find hers right away, the amber gaze softening under his chocolate one and then a sharp pain cuts through him as he thinks about not having her to come home to. He uses a smile to hide it and closes the door behind him with his foot, holding the bags with chinese food against with one hand and the key with the other.

“Hey babe.”

Samantha grins, watching him drop his bag near the door and realizes how just his presence already lifts a weight from her body. Zig goes straight to the kitchen, his stomach growling loudly to indicate how hungry he actually is, but he also admits to himself that he’s not ready to tell her yet, and being around her means having to say it.

She puts the notebook aside and gets up, Cheddar happily following her to the kitchen, sniffing and wiggling his tale to Zig.

“Hi.”

As expected he smiles at the dog, bending down to pet him and even allowing some cheek licks as his hand travels around the furry ears. Sam enjoys his distraction to step closer and examine what he brought, her mouth watering at the sight of the spring rolls but before she can pick anything Zig hugs her from behind. His scent invading her senses as he kisses the spot under her ear, and then her neck, finally planting a soft kiss on her shoulder.

“Wow. Miss me that much?”

Zig smirks and twists her around, making her face him while his hands caress her small back.

“Spending the day away from you is basically torture Sam, you should know that already.”

He brings their faces closer and Samantha closes her eyes, waiting for one of his ‘I missed you kisses’, the ones that are full of necessity and passion but that usually end with a bunch of other sweet caring pecks over her swollen lips. She gets her heart racing just with the memory of how he kisses her, even after all this time, he’s still shakes her core with any love demonstration. But the kiss doesn’t come and she snaps her eyes open, finding a longing expression in Zig’s face that quickly dissolves into a cocky smile.

“Are you waiting for something Samantha?”

He lets his lips touch just the corner of her mouth, his nose brushing against her when he breathes slowly over her yearning mouth.

“Teasing much, Ortega?”

Then he closes the inch distance between them with a kiss, capturing her lips in a hungry movement that she welcomes by parting her lips to give him more access to her mouth. They explore each others tongues, Samantha’s fingers play with his hair and Zig pulls her even closer by the grip of his hands on her waist. The kiss ends with both of them short of breath, lips swollen by the hot and roughness of the act and cheeks lightly flushed pink.

He pecks her cheek before turning back to the food behind her, leaving Samantha to wonder what’s wrong. After all this time together Sam knows what his kisses mean and it scares her because it sounded more like a ‘I’m sorry’ kiss than a ‘I’ve missed you’, mainly because he’s avoiding her gaze strongly. She’s been feeling weird for a long time so she thinks it’s just her normal paranoid-self, shrugging the dark thoughts and moving to get a a wine and two glasses.

“Why did you stay so late?”

Zig gives her a thankful smile when she pours red wine in a glass and hands it to him. She helps him take the food to the coffee table in the living room, sitting comfortably at his side and waiting for the response.

“There was still some customers there and as much as I wanted, I couldn’t just tell them to get the hell out.”

She chuckles and takes another sip of her wine, using her hand to caress his nap in an attempt to make him fully relax since she can see the tension present in his shoulders.

“You could’ve called me, I don’t have any problem telling people to get out so that I can have my man home earlier.”

Zig laughs and pets Cheddar’s head, who’s sitting between him and Sam. Soon Charlie joins them, getting out of her well deserved nap on their bed, she walks stretching and comes to rest on his lap.

“I guess I’m not the only one who missed you.”

It doesn’t take longer than 3 seconds for Charlie to start purring, brushing her head against his hand in search for more love. Sam smiles with the vision of their pets giving Zig all the love she knows he deserves, it warms her heart to know that even when everything is falling apart, their home is always standing strong.

He takes another sip of the wine and it’s the perfect combo with the food, perfect with this moment, with the perfect woman sitting next to him and staring at him with such longing.

“I missed all of you, especially you Sam, as always. I usually would go for a beer, so how did you know that I today what I wanted was wine?”

“Because I know you babe.”

She answers fast, the words so real that triggers something inside him, something that makes him lower his gaze to Cheddar or the couch beneath him. ‘She knows me better than anyone’ and he can’t look at her without blurting the words out loud, words that might change everything.

He drinks more of his wine to gain courage and tell her the news, all the time avoiding her gaze, that’s when he sees the notebook laying beside her and asks:

“Were you working on something before I came or just waiting for me?”

She sighs, the pressure of the blank document beside her gets back and even though she’s not even looking at it, it already consumes her thoughts again. It’s her time to drink more wine in order to keep from spiraling.

“Yeah, working on my thesis.”

The words are rispid and she half-smiles, trying to hide the desperation surging on her from thinking about that damn thesis. He knows how much it’s consuming her and his way of making it better is by sliding his hand over her shoulders, scooping closer to her and giving her a long forehead kiss.

“Insomnia again?”

She simply nods as he puts both of their empty glasses on the table, turning his full attention to the woman in front of him.

“I wish I could’ve been here earlier to take care of you.”

“You’re here now. That’s what matters.”

Samantha lays her head in his shoulder, closing her eyes and breathes deeply as relief fills her chest. Zig fiddles with her hair, pressing his lips to the top of her head, she snuggles her head into his body until her own lips are touching his neck in a sweet care.

“And I’ll always be here.”

His words are strong and full of meaning, yet he’s not that sure it’s true anymore.