#if you need me I’ll be hiding in my little writer’s bunker for the next month

[forever--rain]

.

[mediocre-writerr]

almost [toni shalifoe]

toni shalifoe x reader

requested: You’re an amazing writer! I had this promt for a while now where reader is Shelby’s best friend and Toni’s gf and once they get to the bunkers they find out about everything and try to escape the building but get followd by agents from all sides and the girls are scared for their lives and once they get the oppurtunity to escape the reader offers herself (maybe an agent was about to catch Shelby) and Toni and Shelby (they both don’t want to let go and are in hysterics) as well as the other girls lose it when readers screams and begs them to leave her and get to safety. Pretty heavy angst that you write so amazingly, it would be so nice to see you bring this idea to life.

*not my gif*

The walls started to be the only thing you can remember seeing. The weird wooden paneling in what felt like a fucking holding cell for prisoners’ on death row. You can’t remember what the sky looked like or the stars. All you can remember is this stupid quarantine room that you were put in after you got, quote on quote: saved, from the island.

You haven’t seen any of the girls since you’ve been saved. And you really wished you could’ve, you’ve missed their personalities. Rachel’s determination. Dot’s sarcasm. Fatin’s inappropriate jokes. Leah’s intelligence. Shelby’s kind heart. And lastly, your girlfriend Toni’s protectiveness. All of them, everything about them, you wish you had with you right now.

All of a sudden the entire power went out. The lights shut off and the camera that watches you 24/7 was down. There were footsteps echoing throughout the hallway until it stopped right in front of the door. You waited for the door to open, but it didn’t. It was like there was a moment of hesitation before something was slipped under the door and the footsteps echoed away.

A small piece of paper, written in a handwriting that was quite familiar. You’ve seen this handwriting in Nora’s notebook. From the one and only Leah Rilke, saying: We were right...

All of the conspiracy theories that we once thought were crazy, were actually true. After the shark attack that made us lose Nora and Rachel’s hand, Leah told us everything. From her finding Jeanette’s second phone to seeing Nora talk to a camera in the trees. You all thought it was crazy, until the questions that Dr. Fader and Agent Young asked could’ve only been known if they were on the island.

You flipped the paper over, seeing that there was something else written: Escape plan ???.

The next few days were quiet. You didn’t quite know what to do with yourself. Until finally, your door swung open. Fader and Young were both standing there with hands in their pockets, “You ready to see the girls?”

Your eyes lit up for the first time since you got there. Happiness overwhelming your body at the chance to see the only people who have been keeping your mind sane in that Hell hole.

You shot up from off the bed and followed them into the corridor. But not before trying to examine each hall, to find some sort of exit plan. Then it all came to a view, your favorite people in the entire world.

“Toni?” you whispered and she turned around to face you. A huge smile formed onto her face before she wrapped her arms around you.

You let out a sigh of relief. Your whole body seemed to relax at the slightest touch, “Hi love.” she whispered, holding you tightly.

The two of you let go and you see your best friend. Her long lucious blonde locks no longer there, but rather a buzz cut replacing it. You know you shouldn’t have laughed, but c’mon it’s your best friend. The two of you make fun of each other all of the time.

“You like it?” she asked, pretending to flip her hair over her shoulder.

You bursted out laughing, “Oh yeah! Getting a little bit of Caillou vibes from it.”

She pushed you back softly, before grabbing your shoulders and ultimately bringing you into a hug of your own, “I’ve missed you.” she whispered.

“I’ve missed you too...” you begin to say with seriousness, but you couldn’t help the nickname that popped into your head, “...Shelbald.”

Everyone in the coordior seemed to have busted out laughing at the nickname, “I hate you.” Shelby said.

“Mhmm, I hate you too.” you said, pulling away from the hug. Going around the room to hug all of the other girls.

Once all of you realized that you were alone, without the two agents watching your every move, you decided to catch up on the plan.

“How is this gonna work, Leah? I mean how did you get the notes out to us in the first place?” you asked. A question that has been flooding your thoughts for quite some time now.

She had a small smirk on her face, “We have an ally on the inside.” she said, bringing her voice to a whisper, “I have these napkins for all of you. We’re gonna put them in our door before closing. It’ll give us a chance to not allow it to close.”

Leah handed everyone a napkin. All of us clenching them in our fist, trying to hide it as much as possible.

“Our ally is gonna cut the power like they did when they slipped the note to everyone for me. We’re all gonna run and meet here at the corridor. He told me where the secret exit is and we’re gonna get out through there. The rest of the plan from there is a little fuzzy, but escaping is the most important part.” she explained.

There was a tense silence between everyone for a little bit. Before we all broke out into smiles, “Leah,” Rachel began, “Thank God for your craziness. It’s gonna save our asses!”

“Hell yeah it will!” Fatin exclaimed. All of you laughed along with each other. A sudden weight being lifted from your shoulders, like for once in the past few months everything was gonna be okay.

God, how you were so wrong.

“When is this happening?” Dot asked.

Leah’s lips quirked into a smirk, “Tonight.”

After a couple more hours, the two agents came back. Escorting us one by one to our rooms. We bid each other goodbye before walking into our rooms. As our doors close, all of us stuffing a napkin into them. The slow sounds of footsteps slowly fading away down the hallway, you pushed the door open a little and low and behold...it opened.

You pretended to act the normal the entire rest of the day. Lying in bed, pretending to be upset with the world. It’s not like that part changed, but at least now there was a glimmer of hope at the end of the road. You didn’t know what time it was, it could’ve been 10pm or 2am or 4am, but all of the lights shut off again. And you watched as the cameras fell, like they have been disarmed.

You let out a deep breath, trying to calm your nerves, “Let’s do this.”

Slowly, you stepped out of the room, looking up and down the hallway. The coast was clear. You ran out of your room, trying to not make a lot of noise. When you reached the cooridor, everyone was there and you could tell that nervousness hung over the group.

“We ready?” Dot asked and all of us just nodded, “Let’s fucking go!”

All of you walked out of the cooridors, making sure the coast was clear. Toni intertwined her fingers into your hands and the tension in your shoulders seemed to have fallen away. Shelby was right behind you guys and you made sure to look back every now and then to make sure she was okay.

“There they are!” you heard a deep voice yell.

All of you stopped in your tracks, looking at one another. Then reality hit all of you like a truck, before you took off running. Toni practically dragging you along with her and every second you looked behind you to see Shelby keeping up. But when you do, you can see a butt-load of agents, the distance between you and them growing smaller and smaller by the second.

“Guys! They’re gaining!” you yelled. As time went on, your energy and adrenaline that the group once had was slowly diminishing.

“Well run faster!” Rachel called back. Both her and Leah leading the charge.

“I didn’t sign up for a marathon!” Fatin exclaimed.

Dot shrugged, “It’s either run a marathon or get captured by them.”

Fatin looked back at all of the angry men. And somehow, someway, she started running faster, “Yeah, yeah. Marathon it is!”

You reached the exit Leah was once talking about. Shutting the door behind you guys, locking it just before they could get in. You did a mental head count...Rachel, Leah, Dot, Fatin, Toni...that’s only five? That’s only five! You scanned the two way hallway frantically.

“Love? What’s wrong?” Toni asked.

You shook your head, “Where’s Shelby? She wa s right behind us. I should’ve...I should’ve kept watching her. I should’ve make her run in front of me.”

“What?” Toni questioned, her voice a little softer.

“Where’s Shelby?!” you practically screamed. Your voice echoing throughout the hallway.

You heard footsteps coming towards you. Shelby in the hands of Agent Young, you released a shaky breath. All of you were surrounded, the door to escape right there in front of you. A middle aged lady that you recognized from the Dawn of Eve video appeared from behind the two agents.

“Relax darling. She’s right here. Now how about we all get you back to your cells?” she asked.

Everyone shook their head, “No, this is insane! You can’t keep us here forever!” Dot yelled.

“Well we need one of you to explain to us what happened. So if you’d like to escape, go right ahead, but we keep Shelby. Easy peasy.” she explained.

You looked at Toni, sending her an apologetic glance. Her head tilting to the side in confusion. You leaned forward softly, placing a small kiss to her cheek, before letting go of her hand.

“Y/N? What are you-“ she began to ask, but you stepped towards the woman and the two agents.

You let out yet another shaky breath, “Take me.” you said sternly.

An echo of “What?!” rang throughout the hallway. And you tried not to focus on the fear that laced, each and every one of their voices.

“You let them go, let them go back home. And I’ll switch places with Shelby. I’ll cooperate and tell you the entire truth.” you negotiated.

Shelby stared right at you, “Are you insane?” she asked, tears pooling at your eyes.

“Please. Let them go. I’ll tell you everything I know. That is your best bet of trying to get yourself out of whatever sick game you’re playing. Because if you keep all of us here, we will not cooperate and you’ll know nothing.” you explained. The middle-aged woman pondered your negotiation for quite a few minutes.

And with one snap of her fingers, she was released and you were in the grasp of Agent Young and Dr. Fader. You finally brought yourself to look at the girls who were all crying. And you couldn’t bear to look at them anymore as you heard sobs course throughout Shelby, Leah, and Fatin’s body. Then there was Toni, Dot, and Rachel who were trying their best to stay strong, but you knew they couldn’t.

“You can’t do this!” Toni yelled.

You shook your head, “We don’t have a choice. I need you guys to leave. We’ve lost 2 already! No one else can get hurt anymore.” Everyone went silent, “Can I say goodbye first?” you asked, softly. The three adults all looked at each other before nodding.

You stopped first at Rachel, pulling her into a small hug. And you could feel little tear drops fall onto your shoulder, “I’m sorry we couldn’t save her.” That caused Rachel to sob even more.

You rubbed her back softly, “I’m sorry we couldn’t save you.” she whispered back before pulling away.

Then there was Fatin. She immediately crashed into your arms, holding you tighter than she ever has before. You ran your fingers through her hair, trying to soothe her as best as possible.

“I’m still holding you to your plans for when you escape.” you mentioned, out of the blue.

“What?” she asked, pulling away a little.

You smiled widely at her, “You still gotta fuck the rowdiest guy with biggest dick ASAP!”

And for once since the great escape happened all of you finally laughed and smiled. She sniffled before nodding, “I promise. I’ll dedicate it to you.”

Then Dot. You could tell she was trying her best not to cry, but a few tears slipped out. She hugged you tightly, patting your back in the process, “Do me a favor?” she just hummed in response, “When you get back home to Texas, watch after Shelby. Live in your old house together, something...anything! She can’t go home, she’s not ready for that yet. But you need to protect her and make sure that she stays the same person she is jow. Not the person we knew before, can you do that?”

“With my life.” Dot promised and you look back at her to find a determined nod on her face.

Leah’s turn was next. Her piercing blue eyes looked like the ocean when it rained. The glossiness of the raindrops hitting the water. You smiled at her softly, pulling her into a hug.

You were right by her ear when you whispered, “When we get out of here, you need to tell our story. Tell the truth the whole truth. Don’t let these bastards win. Sue them if we have to. Just get our story out. I trust you more than anyone to do that. Do it for Jeanette and Martha and even Nora. The ones we’ve lost and the ones who are lost in the trauma.”

“I’m on it. You come back to us okay? We need you here too to tell our story.” she said.

You smiled at her sadly, “I’ll try.”

Then there was Shelby. You look at her and she looked at you shaking her head, “No no you can’t do this. You can’t sacrifice yourself for everyone else. I’ll stay here with you! I’ll follow you always!” she pleaded, sobs following her spoken words.

Tears finally fell from your eyes, “You can’t stay here okay? You have to go home.”

“You’re my only family!! Why are you doing this??” she practically yelled.

You sniffled, smiling softly, “You know how we always wanted to be the hero? We would go on missions for church to help people’s lives.” she nodded, “I’m gonna be the hero today and save the people I care about the most.”

Shelby grabbed you forcefully, holding you into her arms. The two of you shaking, as sobs coursed throughout your bodies. You placed your hand on the back of her head, holding her unbelievably close. Until you finally let go.

“I’m not gonna let you do this.” Toni said sternly.

“You have no choice-“ you began to say, but she cut you off.

“Fuck that! I do have a choice and I’m gonna swap places with you! You took Shelby’s place so easily, so why can’t I do that with you?!” her voice echoing, causing everyone to flinch back.

You took your hands in her face, rubbing circles along her cheekbones. Something you did on the island to calm her down when she got too angry or stressed. You placed your forehead on hers and you could see her lips start to quiver.

“You can’t stay here.” she pleaded, “I can’t-what am I gonna do without you? I don’t have Marty or you, what am I gonna do?”

You placed a kiss to her forehead, “I’m gonna find my way back. Find all of you again, okay? I’m never leaving you as cheesy as it sounds I’m always gonna be right here.” you pointed at her heart, “But until then I have to go darling.”

“No, please!” she practically begged. You kissed her softly, but with so much emotion to let her know how much you love her. Not knowing when the next time will be.

“I love you Toni.” you placed one more kiss to her forehead before taking a step back to look at all of the girls.

Again, with one snap of the fingers, you were back in the agents arms, “Escort them to the exit.” the middle-aged woman stated, “You’re coming with me.”

Ear piercing screams rang through your ears. You were about to be dragged off when Shelby and Toni tried rushing towards you. They grabbed your hands trying to pull you back, but the agents were stronger. Not to mention the other agents holding them back.

“We’re not leaving you!!” they yelled.

You didn’t want it to end like this, “Please just go! We lost! You can’t stay here! It’s not safe for you! So please just get out!” you screamed before everything started to break down in front of you, “Just go.” you kept mumbling over and over again between sobs.

Dr. Fader and the middle aged woman escorted you away from the girls and to the interrogation room. While Agent Young escorted the bawling girls towards the exit, probably to drive them to the airport on wherever the hell we are.

“You promised! I trusted that you would keep all of us safe!” Leah spat at Agent Young when they were all alone. She started banging on his chest, “I trusted you! And you-you made us lost Y/N!”

He just let her go at it, before grabbing her wrists as softly as possible, “I tried, but Gretchen watched all of you run from her office. She figured you were going there. And called for everyone to surround you. I tried Leah. I tried for all of you and I failed!”

“You were the ally?” Dot asked and he nodded.

“You girls don’t deserve this. You’ve already been through so much. It’s time for you to go home.” he said sadly, “I’ll take care of her, I promise.”

///

tag list: @hstoria @greysky22 @shalifoestilinski @yourssincerelyj

[mersuperwholocked-lowlife]

Only Temporary

Word Count: 3,289

Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Reader, OC Characters

Pairings: Dean Winchester x Platonic!Reader; Sam Winchester x Platonic!Reader

Warnings: angst, some fluff at the beginning, death; TW: slight panic attack

A/N: okay writing with writer’s block and just writing in general is giving me way more anxiety than before cuz I already know it’s not good but I haven’t posted any content in so long and i feel really really bad, and i know its really long but I just could NOT tie it up n e wayz here it is sorry don’t h8 me plz

Masterlist

You pressed your hand against your stomach, over your bleeding wound as you bit your lip, holding in your cries. You whimpered softly, hearing footsteps, hearing footsteps as clutched your gun tightly, pushing yourself up.

You only counted one vampire, a maximum of two. You never expected a full nest, which surprised you when you first made your plan.

You bent over, holding yourself up as you cocked your gun, shooting at the man who walked in front of you.

“What the hell?!” you heard him yell, watching the bullet go just past his head, hitting the wall behind him.

Damn it

You could see everything getting distorted as the two men ran into the room, both pointing their guns at you.

“Drop your guns,” you pointed your gun at one of them.

“Dean, she’s bleeding,” Sam whispered.

“I said drop them!” you raised your voice, pushing yourself up as your bloodied hand gripped your gun.

“Look, we’re here to help, okay?” Sam started, putting his hands up as he put the gun down next to him, motioning to Dean.

Dean looked at you, then at Sam before nodding, putting his gun down.

You could hear your ears ringing as you scrunched your eyes, falling against the wall next to you.

“You’re gonna bleed out,” Dean said.

“Let us get you help,” Sam gave you a worried expression, as he took a step forward.

“How do I know I can trust you?” you clenched your jaw.

“Either you trust us or you die,” Dean replied.

You could see your vision blurring as your gun slipped through your fingers. 

Sam immediately ran to you, before you collapsed.

“You’re bleeding a lot,” Sam pointed out.

“No shit, Sherlock. You’re not that bright, are you…” your voice faded as you closed your eyes, your body going limp. 

---

You gasped loudly, jumping up in your bed, startled as you looked around the room. You scrunched your eyes, trying to remember what happened, and where you were.

You found yourself laying on a bed, in a dark, empty room. You stood up, wincing softly, looking down at your stomach, which was covered in bandages.

You grabbed your knife out of your pocket, slowly walking out of the room.

“Who are you guys?” they both looked up, tending slightly as Sam stood up.

“We’re hunters. I’m Sam, and this is my brother, Dean,” he explained.

“Where are we?” you asked.

“A bunker. We live here,” Dean said.

You put your knife back into your pocket, taking a few steps forward.

“Thanks for helping me,” you said.

“(Y/N),” you shook Sam’s hand as you gave him a quick smile.

“Nice to meet you. So, what were you hunting, exactly,” Sam motioned for you to sit in a chair next to him as you nodded.

“Vampires. I thought there were only two, maybe three, but there was a whole nest. And if memory serves, there should only be four left,” you explained.

“Wait, what? That means… how did you go against all of them?” Dean frowned as he turned to you.

“Uhm, I cut their heads off? Look, I gotta get going,” you started.

“Do you need help?” Sam asked.

“Nope,” your voice drifted off as you got a phone call, your face dropping.

“One minute,” you got up from your seat, walking away as you answered it.

“Don’t even think about it,” Sam immediately whisper-yelled, turning to Dean.

“What?!” he whispered back.

“Don't even think about eavesdropping,” Sam said.

“I wasn't going to,” he rolled his eyes.

---

“What the hell? What’s the one rule I have? Don’t call me,” you raised your voice slightly.

“I’m sorry, you haven't called for two days and I was getting worried,” your brother's voice wavered as he spoke.

“I’m sorry, kid, something happened. I’ll see you in a few hours,” you said, crossing your arms.

“Okay, I’ll see you later,” he replied as you hung up the phone. 

You ran your fingers through your hair, sighing as you shook your head. Your parents died when you were only 15, leading you into a life with hunting, and taking care of your younger brother, who was only five at the time.

You tried your hardest to keep him safe, meaning keeping him far away at any hotel room you could find. His current home was a hotel in Kansas, seeing that wasn't too far from where you were currently. You felt slight guilt, leaving a 13-year-old on his own, but you made sure to check with him whenever you could.

“Is everything okay?” Dean asked, walking up to you.

“Yeah. Uhm, thanks for all of this, but I have to get going now,” you gave Dean a small smile, about to walk away before he called for you once again.

“Wait, so are you just gonna go after them alone?” Dean asked.

You raised an eyebrow, before nodding.

“Yeah, that’s the plan,” you replied sarcastically.

“Well, if you need backup,” he started.

“I don’t typically work with other hunters,” you interrupted him.

“Neither do we. If you need any help or anything, here are our numbers,” he handed you a sheet of paper before you hesitantly took it.

“Thanks, it was nice to meet you,” you waved to the two of them before leaving.

---

“Jackson? I’m home!” you called out, walking into the hotel room.

Before you had the chance to flip the lights on, he ran to you, wrapping his arms around you tightly as he buried his neck in your arm.

“Hey, I missed you too,” you smiled softly, ruffling his hair.

“Look, I’m almost your height,” he looked up at you.

“In your dreams, kid. Come on, how was this week of school?” you asked, walking with him as the two of you sat down on the small table in the room.

“Same as usual. I hate being the new kid all the time, got bullied a little. Oh, and I made a friend,” he exclaimed.

“A friend? Interesting. By the way, if someone messes with you, just flash them your knife,” you kicked your feet up on the table as you laid back into the chair.

“Uh, no. I’m too scared to do that. That’s how I got my friend, by the way. They picked up my knife after it fell out of my pocket. They were surprisingly chill with it,” he replied.

“Huh,” you shrugged.

“Also, (Y/N), I finished all my homework, so can we watch a movie or something?” he asked.

You looked at the time before sighing, it was only 8. Fine, but, we’re not watching The Untouchables again, okay?” you raised an eyebrow.

“Fine, can we watch Tombstone?” he asked.

“How did you watch that?! It’s rated R!” you scolded.

“It was playing one night,” he shrugged.

You playfully wrapped your arm around his neck, dragging him to the bed as you ran your fingers through his hair, playing with it.

Your brother struggled with anxiety, and you tried to do whatever you could to help him or keep him safe. He felt most at peace when you would play with his hair while he laid his head in your lap.

“I missed you a lot,” his voice was barely above a whisper.

“Yeah, I missed you too, kid,” you sighed.

“I wish things were different,” he looked up at you.

“They will be. This is only-” you started.

“Only temporary, yeah, I know,” Jackson finished your sentence.

You kissed his forehead softly. 

“Come on, smart ass, let’s watch.”

---

“Okay, I’ll try to call you when I can. Remember, don’t be dumb. Bye,” you hung up the call from your brother, putting your phone in your bag.

It had been a week since your encounter with the Winchesters, and just like you’d expect, there was another murder, a woman found with her throat ripped out. It was still in Kansas, 3 hours from your hotel room. 

“Hey, I’m Agent-” you began.

“Agent Willis, I’m aware, your partners are waiting for you inside,” you frowned, tensing up as you rested your hand on your gun, staying alert as the officer led you in, only to see Sam and Dean in front of you.

You let go of your gun, tensing up as you clenched your jaw.

“Agents, I wasn’t expecting to see you two here,” you controlled your glare at them, not wanting to make a scene.

“Yeah, well, the director sent us to meet you here,”  Dean quickly lied.

He stood next to you, whispering.

“Don’t cause a scene,” he said,

“I told you I didn’t need any help,” you smiled, whispering to him from the corner of your mouth.

“Well, I’ll leave you three alone,” the officer walked away from the body, as you turned to Sam and Dean.

“Hijacking my hunt? Seriously?” you glared,

“What? Dean told me you called and asked for help,” Sam frowned, as the two of you turned to Dean.

“I didn’t feel good about you doing this alone,” Dean said.

“I’ve been hunting alone for as long as I can remember, I am fine,” you snapped.

“I’m sorry about Dean’s action. Maybe we’ll just leave,” Sam said.

“Well, now it’s too late. If you two leave now, it’ll look suspicious to the entire department. As much as I hate you, you have to stay and help me,” you rolled your eyes.

Sam’s face dropped slightly, feeling guilty, while Dean tried to hide his joy.

After being almost left for dead by hunters one too many times, you decided you would rather stay on your own. It was also better and safer for Jackson. The fewer people that knew him or knew about him, the less danger he was in. 

“You with us?” Dean snapped his fingers in your face as you rolled your eyes.

“Don’t do that ever again,” you glared at Dean.

This was going to be fun

---

“That’s what I call a successful hunt. You’re a great shot, kid,” Dean wrapped his arm around your shoulder, the three of you entering a diner.

You smiled softly, slightly annoyed but dealing with it. The Winchesters were unlike any hunters you'd ever met, they were empathetic, they weren't just machines. They began to grow on you. 

You sat down in the booth in front of Sam and Dean, while Dean quickly grabbed the menu.

“How long have you been hunting anyway?” Sam asked.

“Ehhhh, 8 years? Give or take some time,” you shrugged.

“8 years?! I thought you were in your 20’s,” Dean raised an eyebrow.

“My parents died when I was younger. It was a kitsune,” you replied.

“Oh, I’m sorry about that,” Dean’s face dropped slightly.

“Well, I’m fine, I mean it was a long time ago anyway,” you shook your head.

“So you’re just on your own?” Sam asked softly.

“Well, yeah,” you started.

Well, no

“But honestly I prefer being on my own anyway,” you said.

“Well, if you ever need any help or anything at all, don’t be shy to reach out to us.”

Your mind began to race to all the negative outcomes of what could happen if you let people in. You simply nodded your head, keeping your thoughts to yourself. You kept thinking about Jackson, trying to make sure he’d be safe. That was your only priority, to keep him safe.

The three of you went back to eating fries, laughing, and celebrating together before you made your way back to the hotel.

---

Over the course of the next few months, you found yourself getting closer and closer with the Winchesters. You felt slightly bad about lying to them about your brother, but from what you gathered, anyone close to them was in danger, which included yourself. They invited you to live with them multiple times, while you shot them down every single time, thinking about Jackson. 

One day he would have to meet them, and they would have to meet him, but that day wasn't going to come soon. Dean reminded you of Jackson a lot, having many similar traits. 

You walked into the hotel room, noticing all the lights off as you raised an eyebrow, looking at the time. It was midnight. He was probably asleep.

You walked to the bed, noticing it was empty as you tensed up.

“Jackson?” you called, feeling panic growing in your chest.

“Jackson,” you flipped on the lights, running to the bathroom to look for him, only to find it empty.

“Jackson!” you yelled.

You ran outside, getting into your car quickly as you dialed his number one more time. There were only a few places he would go, and you intended on finding him, no matter what.

---

It’s been over a day since you got back, still receiving no phone call from him, still unable to find him. You went to his school, asking people around, you went to the library, asking anyone if they’d seen him in the last two days. 

No one had.

You could feel your heart aching, as you closed your eyes, biting your lip as you held in a cry. You sat in your car, rubbing your fingers through your hair, trying to rack up any place he would possibly be.

You jumped slightly, hearing someone knocking at the window before furrowing your eyes, seeing Dean standing at the window.

You got out of the car, wiping your eyes as you looked at him.

“H-Hey, I didn't know you were in town,” you said.

“Yeah, are you working the case here too?” he asked.

“C-Case? What case?” you tensed up.

“The kitsune case? Are you okay? You don’t look too well,” Dean frowned, as he put his hand on your shoulder.

“I need to tell you and Sam something,” your voice wavered as your eyes watered once more, looking up at Dean.

“O-Okay, come with me then.”

---

“I’m so, so sorry I didn't tell you guys before. I-I just thought the fewer people who knew about him, the safer he would be, b-but now I-I can’t,” you stopped yourself, letting out a shaky breath as you rested your head in your hands, trying to keep yourself from breaking in front of Sam and Dean.

“Hey, it’s okay. We’ll find him, (Y/N),” Sam held your shaking hand, squeezing it gently.

“He’s all I have left,” your voice was barely above a whisper.

“Well, what can you tell us that can help?” Dean asked, sitting in front of you.

“I don’t know. I looked everywhere he goes, and he wasn’t there… wait, Dean. Y-You said there was a kitsune case in town?” your heart stopped slightly.

“Yeah…”

“What if it’s the same kitsune that killed my parents? I-I was never… I could never track her down. W-What if she’s back for him? What if she kills him?” you began to breathe heavily, your vision blurring as you looked to the floor.

“(Y/N),” Dean started, frowning slightly as he gave you a look.

You could feel your chest tightening as you squeezed Sam’s hand tightly, your body shaking. You let go of Sam’s hand, holding your head in your hands as you clenched your jaw, closing your eyes.

“(Y/N)? What is it? What’s wrong?” Sam looked at you worriedly.

“I-I don’t know…” your voice faded out as you inhaled deeply, finding it hard to do so.

“I think you’re having a panic attack. (Y/N), you need to breathe,” Dean squatted down, looking at you softly.

“I-I’m trying,” you wheezed, feeling your tears streaming down your cheek.

“Sam, go get a blanket and some water. (Y/N), look at me,” Dean put his hand on your shoulder, lifting your head.

“I-I…” your voice broke as you opened your eyes, looking at Dean.

“(Y/N), we are going to find him. He is going to be okay,” he stroked your cheek softly, wiping away your tears as you nodded your head softly.

“Come here,” he wrapped his arms around you tightly, rocking you, calming you down.

---

“Where’s (Y/N)?” Dean entered the bunker, looking around.

“In her room. She’s been in there for a week,” Sam sighed, looking up at Dean.

“We need to help her,” Dean sat down in front of Sam, sitting at the table in the war room.

“There’s nothing we can do, Dean. We were too late. We found his body. She just needs some time to process.”

Dean looked at your room, seeing the door closed as he sighed. It was something no one could ever forget. Finally tracking down the kitsune, finding Jackson’s body.

He stood up, walking to your room as he knocked at the door.

“(Y/N)? I’m coming in,” he opened the door, finding you sitting up in your bed, wrapping your arms around your legs as you buried your head in your lap.

“(Y/N),” Dean put his arm around your back, pulling you close to him.

You sighed softly, keeping your tears at bay as you rested your head on his shoulder.

“Is there anything I can do for you?” he asked.

“I just wish I could forget all about it,” you replied, your voice low.

“I know,” he started.

“Can you call Cas?” you asked softly.

“What? Wait, you’re being serious? (Y/N),” Dean warned, giving you a frown.

“I can’t live like this, Dean. I’m trying so hard not to give up,” you whispered.

“Why would you… (Y/N), the only way to deal with this is to deal with it. You can’t just forget about your problems and move on. You need to grieve, you need to process.”

“Not forever, just for now-”

“(Y/N),”

“Dean, please. I need this.”

Dean paused, running his fingers through his hair before exhaling softly.

“Fine, I’ll call him,” 

You let out a breath of relief, thanking Dean as you held onto him.

---

You smiled at Sam and Dean, walking down the hallway in the bunker before sitting next to Dean, kicking your feet up.

“(Y/N), my books,” Sam rolled his eyes.

“Then you can move them,” you shrugged innocently.

Sam glared at you, pulling his books away from you before raising an eyebrow to Dean.

Dean only glared back.

“Do grandpa and grandpa need a moment? Seriously, what’s going on? Dean, did you throw away Sam’s smoothie? Sam, did you eat his pie?” you raised an eyebrow, eyeing the two Winchesters.

Sam closed his book, standing up and walking away from the two of you.

You sat up, looking slightly concerned as you looked at Dean.

“I just need to talk to him, give me a minute,” Dean quickly stood up, running towards Sam.

“Hey, what the hell is your problem?” Dean whisper-yelled.

“This is such a dumb idea, Dean. People can’t just forget and move on,” Sam replied.

“It was her choice, and as her friend, we should respect that, okay?” Dean tried to keep his voice down.

“We should've convinced her not to,” Sam shook his head.

“It’s only-” Dean started.

“Only temporary, I know. You keep saying that but it’s been two months, Dean. It's not temporary anymore. Instead of trying to convince her to remember, we just pushed it away. That’s not what we’re supposed to do. We’re supposed to be her friends and we’re supposed to be there for her, not encourage her to push it away,” Sam said, frustrated.

“I know, just give it some more time,” the two of them turned to you, watching you smile softly at yourself, thinking of whatever you thought of.

Dean knew that they had never seen you as happy as you were these past two months. He turned to Sam once more, shaking his head.

“It’s only temporary.”

[bakubitch-minusultra]

Not Alone: Chapter Eleven

-> an apocalyptic series with bnha characters but without quirks because im the writer and i can do whatever the fuck i want :P new character unlocked

-> Word Count: 2.1k

-> Warnings: none(?)

-> Taglist: @5sosfckss @laudthingcat @zphilophobiaz

The sun set as they reached the top of a hill she never climbed. It was in the opposite mountain range from where she had been and she was nervous of it. She didn’t know what lied on the other side. Her feet hurt and she was tired.

He layed a bunch of bows on the ground and gave Y/n a very appealing look. It made her stomach hurt.

She walked to where he had chosen to sleep and smiled at it. There were branches on the ground which made a mat for sleeping. He had chosen a huge tree with great bows to protect them in case it rained. He was like her father, more than she expected him to be. Not that she ever expected to meet him.

“They think you’re dead.”

He put the last bow down and sat on it. He took the jacket he had brought with him and put it down, patting it for Y/n to sit beside him. Her steps hurt her feet now that they had stopped walking. She dropped onto the ground beside him and watched his eyes sparkle as darkness took over the night sky. She tucked her bow and quiver next to her, always close.

“I was taken to the work farms. We were hiding in this old house like your farmhouse. I wasn’t smart like you though. I never thought about bunkers or having a few different houses and traveling between them. I was an idiot. Anyway they came. I hid Mina and Kirishima and let them take me.”

His face was stoic. She wanted him to kiss her again. She started to wonder if he was going to.

“How did you get away from the farms?”

“I met some people while I was there. Doctors who were forced to work the breeder camps and other scientists. They convinced me I needed to start a revolution from the outside. I escaped with some of him.” He shook his head, as if his thoughts entertained him and brushed his hand through his hair again. He looked at Y/n and smiled, “You know a good spot to clean up around here?”

She shook her head, “Never been here before. You’re starting a revolution?”

He nodded, “The camp we were just at is one of our peace camps. It’s like a retreat. The children and young and old stay there. We have people coming and going constantly. Didn’t you notice how easily you were welcomed?”

“I guess. I just thought that’s what people were like when they live in a camp like that. Aside from the machine gun escort that is.”

He laughed again. She liked the sound of it but it reminded her of Kirishima.

“Well that was a big wolf Y/n. How’d you end up with him?”

“His mother gave birth and must’ve gotten sick shortly after. Hades was waiting for me at the door of the cabin one day. He was tiny then. I could hear his brothers and sisters in the woods. I found the mother dead and half eaten surrounded by the other cubs who were weak and sick. It was awful. I shot them and burned them. It’s the closest the infection ever got to my cabin. He was immune anyway so that’s helpful.”

“He’s immune? Naturally? Maybe he never ate any of the mom.”

Y/n shook her head, “Nah, she wasn’t the only sick thing Hades has eaten. He likes the infected.”

He grimaced, “That’s disgusting. Disgusting and lucky all at the same time.”

“It is.”

“What do you know about the start of the infection?”

Y/n shrugged, “People got sick and some died but others lived and went a little crazy.”

His eyes looked dark as his expression lost its humor and the sun set completely. “No Y/n, people didn’t just get sick. The infection was spread on purpose. Everything that’s happened has been a plan all along.”

“That can’t be true.”

“I wish it weren’t. There was something called the United Nations. They did all of this.”

Y/n felt sick, “They were evil?”

“Not evil, just detached. The world was running out of resources and everyone was constantly putting a hand out to them and asking for aid and food and money. The UN had been warning us forever about global warming and the ice melting and the ocean becoming acidic. Anyway in 2012 all of Greenland's ice and snow melted in a week. The earth started to enter a drought. We thought it was a cyclical event but it wasn’t. It was man made. We had pushed it too far. The same time all this was happening, a conference was held in Rio about the environment. Canada, the US and China pretty much pulled out and admitted they had no intention of slowing their pollution to the recommended level. It would be too hard on their economies. That was the final straw. Apparently the UN had a backup plan for a worst-case scenario such as that. They had a plague. It had a vaccine, which made it easy to spread and then control. The problem was it mutated. They spread the virus at the same time they had bombs placed deep in the ocean along the Japanese coastline. They bombed the shelf and pretty much wiped Japan off the face of the earth and made the west coast of North America a target for huge tidal waves.”

It felt like a movie to Y/n. It didn’t feel real. It felt like the ramblings of her father, before.

“How could you know all this?”

“The work farms. I met people who had been part of the initial plan. The plan was to reset everything. Instead the UN decided they wanted to start humanity over but set it up to succeed this time. The breeder farms were built where only the fit and healthy were allowed to reproduce."

She shivered just imagining it.

Bakugo laughed, “It isn’t what you think. I know what everyone thinks happens but it’s not. The girls only breed every three years and only up to three times. The pregnancy isn’t the result of rape, it’s done using science. The baby is made in a lab and then inserted into the woman’s womb.” Y/n gagged and Bakugo laughed. “The religious had the same reaction. The UN never mentioned this plan to anyone but the very high ups. It never went well.”

“The girls are still taken against their will and made to make babies against their will.”

She saw his head nod in the dark, “Yup and the babies are not God’s children to the Christians. Anyway the UN runs the military but again, they sit in their closed office and plan using numbers and facts and data. They don’t leave it to see what the world looks like or how corrupt the military is. They’ve built six cities world wide from the ashes and rubble of previous cities. They plan on cleaning every inch of the world.

Y/n’s head was spinning, “What about the borderlands?”

“They can’t use anymore bombs without affecting the weather and pollution again, so the plan stands at leaving us to our own devices until they have this part of the world cleaned up. Then they’ll come round us up.”

“Why?”

“They want the diseases and illnesses bred out. They won’t allow those people to live and breed.”

“Oh my god it’s like a nightmare.”

“It is. On that note, we need sleep. You sleep first and I’ll keep watch.”

“That’s some bedtime story.” She liked Kirishima’s better. He laughed and Y/n watched his silhouette in the dark for a moment. He didn’t lean in to kiss her. He was watching the hill they climbed. “How long have they been breeding science babies?”

His outline turned to her and she saw the shine of his eyes in the dark,”A long time.”

“Are the babies different than the rest of us?”

“Yeah.”

The broken branches led them to a camp in a valley on the opposite side of the mountain where her farmhouse sat. The size of the camp was disturbing. Bakugo smiled as he saw it and walked directly up to the man holding the gun amid the trees.

“Halt.”

“Oi dunce face!” Bakugo shouted.

The gunman smiled, “No shit, Bakugo you’re alive. I heard they caught you.”

Bakugo laughed, “They think they did. Is Monoma still in charge?”

The man Bakugo called dunce face pointed to the camp, “He’s still in the smallest tent, you know what he’s like. Still paranoid they’ll bomb us.”

Bakugo laughed and pointed towards Y/n, “This is my friend Y/n.” She felt hurt when he called her his friend. She didn’t know why but the word stung.

“I’m Denki,” He put a hand out and Y/n noticed he had a nice smile. She met his golden eyes and smiled back, “Nice to meet you.” His eyes flickered to Bakugo and an even bigger smile crossed his lips, “So where’d ya two meet?”

She looked at Bakugo.

“She walked up to the mountain retreat the other day with a huge wolf for a pet and an unruly teenager.”

Denki’s eyes grew wide, “You have a wolf?”

She nodded. She wanted to find Mina and Kirishima. She didn’t understand why Bakugo wasn’t busting inside to see them. She felt herself fidget in place,

“Well I’m gonna go see Monoma and see what’s new on this side of the hill.”

They walked toward the camp as the sound of birds squawking filled the forest. The gunmen lower their weapons as they hear the sound and they walk past them. The camp opened as the forest spread thin. It looked like the camp they were at before except that everyone was wearing a firearm or knife. At one point Y/n swore she saw a sword. There were no children here.

“Bakguo! You’re alive!”

A girl with long blonde hair and cut off shorts ran and jumped into his arms. Y/n’s heart stopped as she watched the girl kiss his lips. The lips that only just kissed Y/n the day before. She felt heat radiating from her cheeks. She heard about men who weren’t tied down in romance novels and felt sick thinking that she had fallen for one. All the years of reading the novels and judging the ladies who seemed strong and smart and then fell for a jerk. Reality hurts. She wanted Kirishima and Mina and her cabin and Hades and Jirou. She wanted to let the world kill itself and hide up in the mountains. She never wanted to kiss Bakugo again. She couldn’t believe she was so reckless.

“Camie what the hell. You know me better than that,” He twirled her around and looked sheepishly at Y/n, “This is Y/n.” Y.n nodded and gripped her bow.

Camie beamed at her, “Wow nice find Bakugo, He save you from the farms too?”

Y/n raised an eyebrow, “I don’t need a hero.”

Camie looked at Bakugo, who was staring at Y/n. Y/n walked past him and started to look around. If he didn’t want to find his friends then that’s his problem. Y/n would be damned if she would let them live another moment without the knowledge that their asshole of a friend was alive and well.

“You pissed at me?” Y/n didn’t turn and continued along, eyes desperately searching the crowds of people.

“Bakugo.” He shook hands with a very tanned man with the whitest smile Y/n had ever seen. People continued to greet him, but she couldn’t hear them anymore. She saw what she was looking for. She saw a tall guy limping with shaggy red hair. She broke into a run and dived into his arms when she was close enough to him.

As she made contact he turned. His face was exactly as she remembered it. He had her in his arms before she could speak a word.

“Y/n oh my god. Y/n it’s you. Holy shit I thought they got you.” He was planting kisses everywhere across her face.

“Where’s Mina?”

Kirishima’s kisses stopped but his grip on her face was still strong, “They took her.” Y/n felt her heart drop and wanted to collapse into his arms and sub.

“Shitty hair.”

Kirishima dropped to his knees in front of Y/n. His hands left her face and fell onto the tops of his knees.

“Bakugo? Bakugo is that you?”

Bakugo rushed at him and lifted him up. He pulled him into his embrace. The friend’s hug was fierce but all she heard was the sentence ‘they took her’ repeating in her mind.

Kirishima looked back at her, “You found him?”

Y/n shook his head, she had no words. They hug and cry and laugh but she was stunned. Finally able to speak, she muttered, “Where’d they take her?”

Their reunion no longer meant anything to Y/n.

[jawritter]

Twelve Days Of Christmas

Chapter 4

Summary: Dean never realized that Y/N missed Christmas until he turned off an annoying Christmas song on the radio on the way home from a hunt, now he will make it his personal mission to give her the Christmas he misses so much, and if he plays his cards right, maybe he will give her what he has wanted to give her for so many years, himself.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Written For: @spnchristmasbingo​​​

Square Field: Donna

Word Count: 1513

Warnings: Fluff, hint of reader insecurities. I think that’s about it.

A/N: This is to help me catch up on my SPN Christmas Bingo card lol Chapter 5 will post tomorrow! I knew chapter will post every day until Christmas! I know I’m insane lol. This is a real time fic collection and all mistakes will be my own! Please do not copy my work! Hope you all enjoy these!!

**SERIES MASTERLIST**   **MASTERLIST**   **BECOME A PATREON**

One thing you learned about living with Dean Winchester in the time you’d spent living in the bunker was that there was always a chance for random, crazy antics to happen, and it was best to just roll with it; because once Dean got something in that pretty head of his there was no changing his mind. It was best to just let it happen, no matter what it was, no matter how crazy it was, just let him get it out of his system. 

When he came bounding into your room like a small, overly hyper child on Christmas morning, pounced on you like a tiger and then commenced to shaking you until you woke up with a start, proclaiming that you needed to get dressed so that the pair of you could get on the road, it was very obviously one of the times you just needed to roll with it. There wasn’t a chance you could sour his good mood. You would never forgive yourself, and he was evidently very excited about this trip. 

It was freezing of course, and if you had your way you would have been happy to just stay in bed, but it was something about that sunshine-filled grin of his plastered across that freckle dusted face that pulled you out of your warm bed, and into the Impala without much of an argument. The more awake you became the more contagious his evident excitement was, and by the time the pair of you had stopped for breakfast outside of the Minnesota state line, the anticipation was killing you, so you asked him again that morning for what seemed like the thousandth time. 

“Dean, what are we doing in Minnesota, and just where are we going? Did you find a case? If so I could have packed my own bag, you didn’t have to sneak into my room at some unlawful hour in the morning to pack for me before waking me up.”

Dean just grinned at you over his coffee mug, mischief written all over his face, and his eyes lighter than you had ever seen them. Maybe it was the shirt he was wearing, but they just seemed brighter this morning. 

“Not telling sweetheart, you will see in just a few minutes, we have to meet someone here, and then we will be on our way, but I will tell you that this is not a case.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but before you could get a word out Donna’s distinct accent pierced the air from behind you, “Hey you two,” and Dean was on his feet engulfing the woman in a bear hug.

Donna laughed and swatted him off playfully, reminding him she had a gun in the process as you greeted her with much the same enthusiasm as Dean. It had been a long time since you had seen Donna, and it wasn’t under the best of circumstances the last time you all had been together. 

“How the hell have you been, woman?” you asked as she slides into the booth next to you, and the waitress brings her over a cup of coffee for her. 

“Great! Doug asked me out about a month ago, and between the occasional small hunt, my day job, and him I’ve been pretty busy. How have the two been? I admit Dean’s phone call at almost midnight the other night surprised me,” she said, smirking at the elder Winchester like they were sharing some great big secret. Dean just chuckled into his pancakes as they were sat down in front of him, the waitress setting an equally large platter in front of Donna. 

Donna was clearly a regular here.

“So, Doug finally coming around to, ya know, all this?” Dean asks with a mouth stuff full of pancakes, waving his fork around the table as if to state something obvious to anyone but listening ears from other patrons. Clearly he was trying to deflect the subject from Donna’s previous statement. 

“Yep, surprised me too let me tell ya, but he seems to be coming around. It’s always shocking at first ya know.”

“Well what about Jody and girls?” you cut in, cutting your omelet with one of the plastic forks in front of you. “I haven’t seen them since that hunt in Georgia last summer.”

“They’re doing great! I think Kaia and Claire will end up at the altar before long, and Jody isn’t excited about the new hunting couple talking about taking the big leap, she thinks they’re too young, but I think it will be good for them.”

“That’s awesome,” Dean quipped, whipping his mouth with his napkin, his eyes meeting yours for a moment before going back to the female version of himself who was stuffing her face with equally as much food as Dean. 

You personally had no idea how the hell she did that, you’d be sick for days if you ate that much sugar in the morning. 

The conversation flowed easily between the three of you, catching up on hunts, friends you haven’t seen in a long time, and just life in general. It was normal, it was nice. Things like this were a  luxury a hunter rarely ever got in this life, just a breakfast with friends, and if Dean had driven all this way just to do this with you, you would have been grateful, but when Donna stood from the table to hug Dean goodbye after hugging you, she handed him a set of keys, and said, “You two love birds don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” with a wink that made Dean blush, DEAN, and walked away, leaving you confused and staring at Dean with mouth agape. 

Your eyes met his with shocked amusement as he stuttered on the spot and Donna walked away cackling. When he saw you staring at him he recovered, clearing his throat and throwing his arm around your shoulders, leading you towards Baby, apparently determined to act like nothing had ever happened. You let it go. You knew you could really poke fun at him about it, but it was better to file it away under later blackmail.

“So, what’re the keys for?” you asked Dean, as he continues deeper into the frozen state, humming along with the radio as if he didn’t have a care in the world, it was an amazing sight. 

“For this right here,” Dean states proudly, pointing to what you quickly recognized as Donna’s cabin. Your eyes traveled between him and the cabin. 

“Really?”

“Yup,” Dean said, getting out of the car and you followed him, letting him take your hand and lead you into the cabin Donna had eventually warmed for the two of you once she knew you were coming. “This is day 10. We’re gonna be staying here, just the two of us until after Christmas.” 

You turned to him in utter disbelief at what you were hearing. You and Dean, just the two of you, for ten whole days? Could this be real?

“I thought you could use a real white Christmas, and what better way to experience that than a snowed-in cabin in Minnesota; lucky for you I just happened to know a friend who had one to spare.” 

You closed the distance between the two of you, throwing your arm around his neck and hugging him tightly, which he returned without hesitation. 

“Oh my God Dean! This is perfect!” you tell him, releasing him from your grip and beginning to look around the cabin. It was perfect, and with a little decorating it could be very pretty with some Christmas decorations, and if you could talk him into it, a tree. 

“Only thing is there’s only one bed in the place, but if you're uncomfortable sharing then I’ll take the couch.” 

Your throat closed up for a moment, and you swallowed hard to get your voice to work again. Dean Winchester in your bed was something you had always dreamed of, the question is could you survive it actually happening? 

You couldn’t make him sleep on the couch for ten days, and the bed was plenty big enough to share. 

“I’m okay with sharing Dean, It’s not like you got cooties are something,” you play, hoping to hide your racing heart and the fact that your mind had suddenly turned to mush. 

“Oh sweetheart, I think you like my cooties,” he said, winkie at you. 

Suddenly it was your turn to blush as a wide victorious smile spread across his face. 

“I’m gonna go grab our bags so we can get settled,” he announces before turning to disappear out into the cold. 

You look around at what was going to be your little slice of Heaven for the next ten days with excited apprehension. There was so much that could happen in ten days, but if you didn’t get your feelings under control for a certain green-eyed hunter, you didn’t know how happy of a Christmas you would be able to have when he flat out rejects you.

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Twelve Days Of Christmas Tag List: 

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[storytellingfandom]

It Had to be You ~ Part Nine

Summary: Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world she walked into hers.  Lin Beifong saw the world in two colors; black and white. That changes though when she meets the siren working with one of the largest gangs in Republic City.

Azami never had a choice. Didn’t have a way out. But she could destroy things from the inside. She could move information around. She could lie and smile with the best of them.

Neither needed anyone. Neither needed love. So what happens when fate ties them together? Can they save each other? Or will a smoking gun end something before it begins

A/N: A 1930s/40s LOK AU. Note that there will be themes that were present during this time including smoking, drinking, underlying homophobia, and potentially smut later on down the line. Writer’s views are not that of the characters.

Word count: 4613

They’d fallen asleep together, Lin’s head on the pillow, half on the bed and half kneeling between the chair and the ground. Azami’s face resting near her own, hand resting over Lin’s to keep her close and feel it when she got up or moved. Both exhausted from the conversation they’d had, from the emotions that both had worked through and processed. 

It was how Tapeesa found them when she came to get them for dinner. A soft smile crossed her features seeing the soft looks on both their faces. Walking towards them, she placed a gentle hand on Lin’s back first, watching the chief jump out of instinct but relax when she recognized the older woman. 

“Supper’s ready, and you’re going to want to get out of that position before you ruin your joints. See if she feels up to trying to get up at all.” Tapeesa murmured, patting the younger woman’s back. 

Nodding tiredly, Lin rubbed her face before turning to Azami. The worried lines that had been forming on the other had smoothed out in her sleep, dark hair fanning out across her pillow. Her hand clutching her own tightly, as if afraid she’d disappear. Bringing Azami’s hand up to her lips, Lin pressed kisses to each knuckle before shifting to sit on the bed. 

“Azami, darling, it’s time to get up.” Lin murmured, fingers reaching out to brush against her cheek, moving the strand of hair that had fallen there. “Tapeesa came in and said it was time for supper.”

Shifting in her sleep, Azami hummed and pulled Lin’s hand closer to herself. “I’m not really hungry.” 

“I know.” Leaning down, Lin pressed her lips to the other’s forehead. “But you need to eat, you’re still healing and need the strength. Come on, if I have to eat, you do too.”

Groaning gently, Azami’s eyes slowly opened to reveal the forest green eyes. Blinking a couple of times, she smiled slightly seeing Lin. “Alright...alright. You win.” 

“Good, now, Tapeesa wants to have you try to stand for a bit and come to the table. If you need to sit or can’t do it though, I want you to tell me immediately. Deal?” Lin asked, her stomach clenching at the idea of it but knew that if they wanted to get out of there, Azami was going to have to be able to move. Too many people helping them would attract attention. 

“Arlight.” Azami agreed, carefully moving to sit up. Once in that position, she took Lin’s offered hands and managed to sit on the edge of the bed. Closing her eyes, she waved away Lin’s fussing before getting herself slowly to her feet. 

Knees wobbled and collapsed to start with. Lin was there to catch her, holding her firmly and steadily against her chest. 

“That’s it, you’re getting back into bed. I’ll tell…” 

“No. I’m just light headed. I just need to stand here for a minute.” Azami murmured, leaning her head against Lin’s shoulder. “Just hold me here a minute.” 

She let Lin hold her a few minutes longer before taking her arm and managed to start walking towards the dining room table. A hand wrapped around her stomach, the pulling and sharp edge of pain still there to remind her of that injury. 

June noticed her first and was quick to her feet, hurrying over to wrap her arm around Azami’s other side. “We’ve got you, darlin’. Just lean into us.” 

Taking the full weight, both women helped her to sit, Lin moving in to gently dab at the sweat on her brow from the exertion. Tapeesa came into the room next with an easy noodle soup for Azami. She’d made it with just enough hen to give the woman some protein, and fortified the rest with different vegetables that would go down easy. She brought a pitcher of fruit juice over a moment later and poured some for the woman, something to bring her blood sugar back up again. 

“Here we are, dear. Let’s get this into you.” Tapeesa murmured, making sure she ate some before bringing the rest their dinner. 

June thanked her wife with a kiss to the cheek as she tucked into her dinner, turning to Lin. “We have a safe house for the two of you. Outside of the city, hiding you in plain sight. Takao will expect us to be moving her further into the mountains. We’re going to head west, wind around, then go east to the lake. We’ve got a place there for you.” 

“But what about you? You can’t stay here.” Azami asked, a frown crossing her features. 

“Don’t you worry your pretty head about us, you know I won’t let anything happen to Tapeesa.” June reassured her, reaching across to squeeze Azami’s hand. 

“We’ll go underground, back into the old bunker we used to hole up in when the gangs first started to move in. No one knows where they are, and only those who know us will know how to contact us.” Tapeesa said, smiling at her partner. “We’ll have a runner to check on the two of you though. And bring you supplies.”

“When do we leave?” Lin asked, one eye watching Azami to make sure she continued to eat, gently pushing the bread towards her. 

“Tonight. You’ll ride in the backseat of a truck. We have a crate we’ll put Azami in, line it with what we can to make sure she isn’t jostled too much.” June explained and reached for a map. “Go this route to get you out of town. Shouldn’t be too many checkpoints. You speak with your men?”

“Sent a code to someone I trust. I should be the one to ride in the crate though.” Lin frowned, setting her spoon down. 

“We need you out of the crate. You’re not injured and can handle a gun faster than most. If something goes sideways, they need you.” June answered, her tone firm and leaving no room for arguments. “We’ll make it as safe as we can for her. Need to trust me on this one, chief.” 

Azami reached out gently, hand resting on Lin’s reassuringly. “It’s alright, love. I’ll be fine.”

“There’s checkpoints to switch trucks along the way. You’ll be able to check on her while traveling to the location. I have a bag of medical supplies for her ready to go with you.” Tapeesa reassured Lin, offering her a smile. “I know it’s hard, I’ve been in your position one too many times myself. But it’s the safest option for both of you.” 

Nodding, Lin sighed, and brought Azami’s hand to her mouth to kiss. “How’d I let you drag me into this?”

“My winning personality.” Azami teased, a tired smile crossing her features. 

Rolling her eyes, Lin released her hand and turned back to her food, muttering about damn songstresses. 

Chuckling, June looked Azami over, assessing her strength before turning to her wife. “We should get her onto the couch to rest some before we pack her up.” 

“Put her back in the bed, they’ll both need sleep.” Tapeesa answered, eyes flitting over to Lin. If how she’d been acting the last few moments were any indicator, she wasn’t going to let Azami out of her sight while she was still in these early days of healing from her wounds. 

Inspecting the bowl, June nodded when she saw Azami had eaten a little over half of soup and a small portion of bread. Coming to her side, she waved for Lin to stay seated and finish her supper. The taller woman easily helping Azami up to her feet, a firm arm around her. 

“I��ve got you now, baby girl. Let’s get you to bed.” June murmured, taking slow steps towards the bedroom. 

Tapeesa waited until June was in the other room before turning back to Lin. “She’ll never admit how scared she was that night when they brought Azami in. She...we thought we lost her a few times on the table. She wants to get a new one when this blows over, won’t be able to sit at this one.” 

Lin watched the older woman’s fingers pick at the blood stain that had seeped into the wood. Azami’s blood. Reaching her own hand over, she touched the stain before she took Tapeesa’s hand in her own. “I’m not going to let anything else happen to her, I swear that to you both.” 

“I know, we both know.” Tapeesa squeezed Lin’s hand in her own. “But it’s hard, when you raise them and then see them dying in front of your eyes even when you’re doing everything you know to save them. That doesn’t go away quickly.”

Nodding her understanding, Lin looked over towards the door before turning back to Tapeesa. “Let me help with dishes. You’ve done enough.” 

“I’ll dry ‘em and put ‘em away for you. Spirits know June never puts anything away in the same place twice already.” Tapeesa answered, standing and followed after Lin into the kitchen. 

********

June helped Azami into the bedroom and sat her gently on the bed. For as large as the woman was, her touch had always been surprisingly tender when it came to those she cared about the most. The older woman walked into her bedroom and pulled out a dress of Tapeesa’s, it was a little old in style but a younger look than some of the others she wore these days. And the dark, burgundy red would always be a color that looked good on Azami. Coming back to the bedroom, she smiled. 

“Brought you something to wear for the ride over. I know you’d prefer those trousers, but you’re not going to be able to wear them while that incision on your stomach heals.” June announced, hanging the dress up. “You want chief to help you get dressed, or me?”

“You, I know she’ll see it taking care of me but if I could avoid the whole nurse part of her seeing me naked longer, that’d be great.” Azami answered, her voice betraying how tired she was. 

Nodding, June moved and helped Azami out of the nightgown they put her in, very carefully pulling it up and over her head. It was in those moments, the younger woman could really study the woman who had helped to raise her. Black hair had long faded into a dark, steel grey with streaks of white beginning to weave in as well. Wrinkles at the corner of her eyes, frown lines, smile lines, lines that told so many stories scattered across her face. A sharp jaw, a once straight nose that had been broken once or twice. What had always remained the same were the whiskey colored eyes that were watching her for any signs of pain or infection in the wound. Eyes that could warm you from the inside out, or cut you down where you stood without a second thought. 

Her tall form was just broad enough to make her imposing, but slender dips in her hips marked the femininity that she used to show off in high waisted trousers for her wife. And still would. Tall enough to intimidate any man that tried to get in either of their faces. Height that Azami could only wish she had. 

With the dress over her head, she carefully maneuvered her arms into the sleeves that sat comfortably at her elbows. The scoop neck of the dress offering a modest view of her neck and down to the tops of her breasts, hugging gently before flaring out into a skirt that would touch below her knees. Taking June’s hands, she stood and fixed the skirts around her before sitting back on the bed. 

“‘Peesa will hate that I’m having you sleep in this, but it’s going to be easier on all of us if we do it this way.” June murmured before helping her to lay back in the bed. 

“She can add it to the white hairs you’ve given her over the years.” Azami teased, sinking into the soft pillows. 

“Hate to give her more than I already have.” June answered, shrugging her shoulders. She didn’t deserve her wife, or everything she’d put up with over the years, but here they were. And there wasn’t a better woman she could ask for to be at her side. Some time alone together, even if both wished it could be different, would be cherished. “Besides, gotta keep her on her toes.” 

Chuckling gently, Azami took June’s larger hand in her own and squeezed it gently. “Thank you, for everything.”

Frowning gently, June sat in the chair that sat beside the bed. “Now don’t you go saying goodbye to me. This is just for a little while, we need to move Takao into our own trap before we can put this to bed. And we’ll set one, don’t you worry. You just use this time away from all of this to get to know that lady of yours, you hear? Make sure she’ll treat you right.” 

A smile crossed Azami’s features and she nodded. “She will, June.” 

“She better.” Was all she answered, brushing some of Azami’s hair back. “Only the best for my Nightingale. Now get some sleep. You both have a long night ahead of you.” 

**********

When Azami woke up next it was the middle of the night to Tapeesa’s gentle nudging. Lin was asleep next to her, hand on her stomach to feel for her breathing. 

“Easy darlin’, but it’s time to get moving.” Tapeesa murmured, seeing Azami’s eyes open. 

Nodding, she turned to Lin, reaching a hand out to gently touch the police chief. Watching her shift and wake after a few moments, she offered Lin a small smile. “Morning sleepy head.” 

“Morning to you too, how’d you feel?” Lin asked, moving to sit up. 

“Sore, but I’ll be fine.” Azami murmured, resting a hand over her injury as she sat up. 

Letting Lin help her to her feet again, the two of them walked to the living room where the older two women were waiting for them. Both were bundled up, Lin’s hair hidden under a cap and makeup dabbed over her scars to hide them. Lin dressed in some of June’s old clothes, rolling the sleeves and ends of the pants up just enough to get by. They could worry about it more later. Tapeesa gave Azami something for the pain, something strong enough to help her sleep through most of the ride they hoped. 

“You take care of yourself, do you hear me? I’ll be very upset with you if you let that wound get infected or push yourself too hard.” Tapeesa announced, cupping Azami’s cheeks. “You’re catching up with June in the white hairs you’re both giving me.” 

Smiling, Azami leaned into her touch, pressing a kiss into the deep brown of the older woman’s palm. “I will, I’ve got someone to make sure I do.”

Nodding, Tapeesa pulled the woman into her arms and held her close for a long moment. “I may not have given you life, but you’re still my sweet daughter. Do you understand? And I love you for it.” 

“I love you too, mama.” Azami murmured, pressing her neck against her neck. 

Clearing her throat to hide the tears that threatened, June wiped at her eyes and turned to Lin. “Take care of her for us. She’s the world to us.” 

“I will, I promise you that.” Lin answered, offering her hand. Surprised when June pulled her into a hug, she returned it stiffly at first before sinking into it. “Thank you for trusting me with her.” 

June nodded before letting Tapeesa hug Lin herself. “Take care of yourself too, you’ll need to so you can take care of her.” 

“I will.” Lin promised and looked over when a very specific knock sounded.

June moved to the door, answering it, she nodded to the man and motioned the women over. “This is your ride you two.” 

Lin was at Azami’s side, supporting her and helping her to the door. Letting the man get on the other side of her, both of them helped her down the stairs and to the truck. June followed after them, jumping into the crate, her seventy plus years not hindering her a bit, she helped Azami to where the bed had been laid out for her. Settling her there, she kissed the top of her head. 

“I love you, Azami.”

“I know, I love you to mama.” Azami answers, squeezing her hand. “Be safe, for me.”

“Always am. We’ll get word to you soon.” June promised, one last hug given before she forced herself to climb out of the crate again. Nodding to the other two, she slipped back into the apartment building, fading as if she’d never been there. 

*********

When you looked at the floor of the truck, it was covered in what would appear to be show gear: costumes, boxes of sheet music, the occasional instrument or two that were too fragile to write out in the bed of the trunk in the crate. No one noticed Lin’s form hidden amongst the rest of the clutter. Still, she hardly dared to breathe as they drove along. 

They’d been stopped once leaving the city and that had gone smoothly enough. No real questions and no one wanted to unload a crate full of drums and other heavy instruments just to peer inside. Still, she breathed easier once they were past the guard and headed into the winding roads. 

One had remained on the hilt of her revolver, ready to pull it and defend herself and Azami with it. The ride had been mostly silent except for the jazz playing on the radio until the man spoke up.

“Hey chief, what kind of car should we be worried about following us?” 

Lin’s heart stopped and she lifted her head up. “Describe it to me.” 

“Black, real fancy looking. One of those new sport--” 

The shots rang out a second later. The driver cursed, swerving in hopes to keep the flying bullets away from their tires. Lin was out of her spot in a flash, climbing to the window, she rolled it down and hung out of it just enough to get her own shots in. Jade eyes were sharp and her steady hand meant that one of her shots struck home on the car. The fluid now pouring the car proved it. Radiator had a leak. 

“They’re not letting up!” 

“Idiots will blow the damn car if they don’t.” Lin answered, climbing back inside the truck. Remembering Azami in the crate, she was looking behind at it and cursed. “We need to get off the road. Now.” 

“But--”

“Do it!” 

The driver cursed and turned the wheel sharply, heading into the woods. The other car was able to follow them to a point until the hill made a sharp turn and the incline was too much for the car. They left them behind and didn’t stop until they were far enough away, making enough turns to confuse anyone who tried to follow them. Jumping out of the truck once it was stopped, Lin took the crowbar and immediately busted the crate open. Finding Azami curled in the corner, she breathed a sigh of relief when the other woman looked up. 

“What’s going on?” Azami asked, waiting for Lin to come to her. 

“Takao, his men came after us. We lost them.” Lin answered, not bothering to get Azami to her feet and instead lifted her into her arms. 

Walking to the truck, Lin cursed when she saw the flat front tire. “Well now what…” 

“My friend will be waiting for you, two miles up the road. You get there, don’t you worry about me.” 

“We can’t just leave you here alone.” 

“Oh yes you can, get her to safety or Miss June will have my head. Now go.” 

Lin wanted to argue, but the look on the man’s face told her that it was going to be in vain. Nodding, she started out again on foot, following the path. The path led her to a cave where she saw another car waiting for them. 

“Who goes singing off in the treetops, and only in the mornings do they come call in the city?”

“The nightingale.” Azami answered without hesitation. 

Smiling, the older woman put her cigarette out. “Good to see you again. Let’s get you ladies out of here, heard the gunshots earlier.” 

“They won’t be going anywhere anytime soon.” Lin reassured the other, putting Azami in the back seat. 

“Good, because we’re not stopping anymore. Ain’t safe, word’s gotten out.” The woman answered and climbed into the driver’s side. 

*********

Both of the women in the front seats kept close eyes on the road. There were cars that followed them, but the woman seemed to know which roads to take to get them cleared of the men that tried to tail them. 

“Drove June’s cars for years.” She explained, backtracking a ways before moving forward again. “Know these woods and roads better than anyone else.” 

“I thought what she did was mostly legal.” Lin asked, watching one care for a moment before it turned off. 

“It was, but smuggling’s smuggling, darlin’. Not everyone’s gonna like what you do. Had to be able to get away fast.” She answered, handing Lin some coffee. 

The three of them drove further into the mountains, turning off when it was cresting to head towards the lake June had mentioned. The woman turned down a road that the car had no business being on, but she managed to ease it through, trying to be careful of the bumps along the way. Lin turned to look worriedly at Azami when a groan sounded from her. 

“Almost there, baby doll. Then your lady here can tend to you.” 

The house that they arrived at was small, a simple cottage that would house the two of them comfortably enough. Jumping out of the car, Lin hurried to the backseat and helped to ease Azami out of it. The woman came around with their bags and led the way into the house. Flicking the lights on, the small woman nodded to Lin. 

“Turned the water on for you, and the heat. Should be good to go for baths. Food’s in the cupboards and the ice box. Garden has some vegetables in it too. There’s some wood out back for you and you can chop more if you need it. I’ll be by in a few days to check on you and bring you more food. Clothes are in the closet for both of you. Take care of our nightingale, chief.” 

Once alone, Lin walked to the bedroom and placed Azami down on the bed. Hurrying to the bag with the medical supplies, she found the tablets on top to help with pain and hurried to the kitchen for water. Bringing both back to Azami, she helped her take some and eased her down onto the pillows. 

“There’s some sandwiches and fruit in the bags for us. I need you to eat some of that for me.” Lin murmured, brushing hair from Azami’s face. 

Nodding, Azami leaned heavily against the pillows. “Okay, and then can we just lay here?��� 

“Of course we can.” Lin answered, going to retrieve their food. 

The sun was going down, and both would need sleep soon. She would light the fireplace in the bedroom first though once they ate and got out of these clothes. Removing the cap, she pulled the pins from her hair to let her hair down around her shoulders. Coming back with their food, she handed some to Azami before both ate their fill of it. 

“I’m going to get a fire going, and then we’ll get you changed into something more comfortable, okay?” Lin asked, smiling when Azami nodded struggling to stay awake. 

Moving to where the wood was, she brought it in and found old newspapers for kindling. Coming back to the bedroom, she knelt down and stacked the wood, slipping kindling in before lighting it. Blowing gently, it took a few attempts, spirits when had she become so rusty at this, before it finally caught and took off. 

Smiling, she looked back at Azami expecting a smart remark when she saw her asleep instead. Chuckling gently, she walked to the chest of drawers and pulled out a long flannel shirt. 

“Alright you, I need you to wake up so I can help you change.” Lin announced walking towards her. 

“Not how I imagined the first time you taking my clothes off would be going.” Azami answered, not opening her eyes, but a slow smile crossed her features. 

“Wasn’t how I imagined it either.” Lin answered, before realizing what she said. “I mean…”

“Oh ho, so you have imagined that have you?” Azami teased, taking Lin’s hands to sit up. “Which dress did it for you, chief? Or was it the pants?” 

Lin leaned in and kissed her to shut her up, groaning as she playfully as she tugged at Azami’s hair. “Shut up.” 

Helping her get the dress up and over her head, fingers skimmed over the skin, eyes drinking in the form but she forced herself to allow herself only a peek. There’d be time enough when Azami was healed. Pulling the shirt over her head, arms were in before Lin helped her to lay down again. 

Grabbing her own pajamas, Lin slipped into the bathroom to go through her nightly routine the best she could with not being at her apartment. Washing her face, she ran fingers through her hair before changing into the long shirt herself and made her way back to Azami. Gun was moved from its holster and placed on the bedside table next to her, just in case. Walking through the house, she made sure all the doors were locked, the windows were barred, and curtains drawn. She checked behind furniture, and looked inside cabinets. Assured they were alone and safe, she allowed herself to head back to the bedroom. 

Climbing into the bed, she laid on her side looking at Azami. The other couldn’t lay on her side at this point, but she did turn her head and smiled at the police chief.

“Are you going to come over here and hold me or just stare all night?” Azami asked, reaching a hand over for her. 

Smirking, Lin stayed put at first. “Thought I’d stay here and enjoy the view for a minute.” She answered, chuckling when Azami tugged on her night shirt and finally scooted over towards her. “Spirits, patience woman I’m coming.”

Carefully, Lin came up beside Azami and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close so that she could bury her face in her hair. Pressing small kisses to the top of her head, she let out a contented sigh. 

“I’ve got you, beautiful. Try to get some sleep.” Lin murmured, fingers running up and down the length of her arm. 

“There’s no one else I’d rather be here with.” Azami answered, nuzzling closer the best she could laying on her back. Managing to get her head over Lin’s heart, she allowed the steady beat of it to lull her into sleep, her arms allowing her to feel the safest she had in more years than she cared to ever admit. 

Was it love for them? The songs would say it was. But their minds told them to wait, to see, and to simply exist in that moment together. And so, slipping off to sleep, they did. 

[waywardnerd67]

Let Me Go

Summary: Dean has a huge revelation that may have come too late. Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Reader Pairing: Dean x Reader Warnings: Angst/Attempted Suicide/Suicide Note/Mention of Self-Harm/Depression/Fluff Word Count: 2405 Prompt: “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.” A/N #1: This is for @amanda-teaches​ 2K Writer + Reader Challenge A/N #2: As always this is unbeta so all mistakes are mine. Likes, comments and reblogs are splendid and I will love you doubly for them! Enjoy!

The vamp case went without a hitch. Dean was washing off his machete before placing it back at his side. Sam was placing the last body on the pyre, the heat warming his skin. Even if it was a pyre full of dead vamps the flames were mesmerizing to Dean.

“I wish (Y/N) was here?” he whispered.

Sam stepped next to him, “Have you noticed she’s been isolating herself from hunting?”

Dean nodded staring at the flames whipping higher into the air. The way the swayed shades of red and orange brighten the dark night. It reminded him of (Y/N). Her vibrant personality, her warmth towards those who were hurting and the fire that burned when she would hunt down evil.

“Dean?” Sam placed a hand on his shoulder bringing him out of his daze.

“Yeah Sammy, I just think after everything she’s lost this past year it’s understandable for her to distance herself. Maybe we all could use a break.” Dean began to walk towards Baby.

They had twelve hours before they were back at the Bunker. Twelve hours for Dean to shallow the ever growing feelings back down in the dark depths of his soul. He did not know exactly when these feelings started but one day he saw her in a whole different light. Her hair seemed to always flow behind her, her eyes shined bright like gems and her laugh was like music to his ears. He found himself always wanting to be next to her or listening to her talk about lore.

Exhaustion was hitting Dean hard as he pulled into the Bunker’s garage. He shook Sam awake before getting his bag from the trunk. When they walked into the hallway Sam went towards his room as Dean walked down to his. He paused for a moment before opening his door as his chest ached slightly. The familiar tug to walk down to (Y/N)’s room had him taking a step away from his door. His eyelids fell heavily changing his mind about checking in with (Y/N).

“I can talk with her in the morning. Even make her favorite pancakes.” he whispered before falling onto his bed drifting off into wonderful dreams where there were no monsters and he could be with the woman he loved.

There was a loud crash from outside his room that had Dean jumping out of bed. Rushing out his door he found plates broken just down the hall.

“DEAN! Help me!” Sam cried out kneeling down at the end of the hallway.

He rushed to Sam’s side when all the air in his lungs evaporated. Lying on the ground was (Y/N) in a pair of sweatpants and one of Dean’s flannels. One of the sleeves was bunched at her elbow revealing line after line of scars healing from recently being etched in her skin.

“Sam, is she…” his heart was pounding in his ears awaiting an answer, “Sam!”

“She has a pulse but it’s faint. We need to get her to a hospital now,” Sam gathered her up in his arms, “Check her room to see if there is a hex bag or anything to tell us what happened to her.”

Dean stood there for a moment watching Sam carry her towards the garage. He rushed towards her bedroom immediately looking in the most likely places a hex bag would be hidden. He noticed her sleep meds were out on her nightstand the bottle opened. His stomach sank as he picked up the bottle.

“No, no, no, no.” He mumbled looking into the empty bottle that was refilled two weeks ago.

The next thing he saw was a letter next to the bottle with his name on it. Picking it up, his hand began to shake seeing her handwriting and vile rose into his throat at the realization of what he was holding. Grabbing the bottle, he stuffed both of them into his pocket running out of her room towards the garage.

As soon as he was on the road he pulled out his phone, “Sammy, she took all of her sleeping meds. S-She tried to…”

“I know Dean. The doctors have taken her back now. How far out are you?” Sam cleared his throat then sniffled, breaking Dean’s heart.

“I’ll be there in ten minutes.” He pressed his foot down further on the gas pedal.

When Dean arrived at Jewell County Hospital, he found Sam sitting in the emergency waiting room with his head in his hands. He lifted his head revealing bloodshot eyes and tears running down his cheeks. Dean’s heart stopped as Sam walked over to him.

“She’s unconscious but they have her stabilized. They’re not sure what kind of damage has been done since we don’t know when she took…” Sam paused running his hand over the back of his neck.

“W-When can we see her?” Dean swallowed the large lump in his throat.

Sam waved his hand to follow him, “We can see her now.”

The brothers were outside her room when Sam paused, “I… I can’t go in there. It’s too much.”

He patted his brother’s shoulder before stepping inside the room. Dean grabbed a hold of the door handle to steady his weakened knees. (Y/N) was lying there with tubes and wires coming from all around her. Slowly, he made his way over to the chair next to her bed sitting before he fell to the ground. Her normal glowing porcelain skin was now the same color as the hospital bed sheets. (Y/N)’s full lips were pale and cracking. The only sound giving him hope was the strong beat of her heart on the monitor let him know she was fighting.

“(Y/N/N), why? Why would you try and take your own life?” he whispered feeling a jab from his pocket.

He pulled out the letter, his hands trembling once again before he opened it.

Dean,

I love you. You’re an amazing, strong, selfless man who would sacrifice himself without thought to save those in need. You saved me. You saved my life from the monsters of this world. I want you to know that what I’ve done has nothing to do with you or Sam. This was my decision. I’m not strong enough to fight off the demons within me. They’re overwhelming me and I could not live with myself if something happened to you or Sam because I was not strong enough.

You’re going to be angry. You’re going to be sad. You’re going to blame yourself and drown in whiskey. Please, for me, don’t do that. You couldn’t have done anything to save me this time. Don’t hold onto my memory. You are the only person on this earth that could keep me tethered to it. I love you so much. I know you will move on from this and find someone who is strong enough to be by your side.

Promise me, Dean… promise me that you will let me go. I can’t fight it anymore. You have to let me go.

Love, (Y/N)

Tears dropped onto the paper making the ink bleed. Clutching the letter to his chest he grabbed her hand resting beside her pressing it to his forehead. A painful sob escaped his lips as a wave of fresh tears flowed down his cheeks.

“(Y/N), I didn’t know. I-I didn’t know how much pain you were holding in. I should have seen it. I should have been there. (Y/N), I need you with me. Sammy needs you. We don’t want a life without you. I can’t… you need to wake up because I can’t do this without you. I love you, (Y/N) (Y/L/N). I’m in love with you and I need you by my side.”

His eyes snapped up when he felt her squeeze his hand. A soft groan escaped her lips as her eyes slowly opened. She tried to speak but only a hoarse breath came out.

“Hold on (Y/N), I’ll get a nurse.” He kissed her knuckles before rushing out into the hallway.

Six Weeks Later

Dean was leaning against Baby waiting for (Y/N) to come out the familiar beige door. The last six weeks had been difficult for them all. Sam was working cases with Jodi and Donna while Dean stayed behind at the Bunker. (Y/N) was admitted to the Behavioral Health Unit for seven days of intense therapy before being released into an out-patient program.

Everyday, Dean visited her in the hospital listening to her talk about her sessions and taking home the drawings she had. While at the Bunker, he cleaned up her room making sure it was ready for her return. Every drawing or poem she gave him was placed in a notebook for whenever she was ready to see them. During her first day home, they walked throughout the Bunker for every hiding place she had with a sharp object.

I want to make sure I’m not tempted to do anything stupid. She had said as they placed a lock on one of the cabinets in the kitchen.

Each day was easier than the next. Dean gave her space even though his body urged him to be next to her at all times. He knew she did not need a babysitter but each morning he woke up in a cold sweat rushing out to see she was still there. Every morning he found her safely in her bed sleeping peacefully. They would eat breakfast together and work on finding information for Sam. Thursday was deemed movie night and they would curl up on his bed to watch whatever movie she picked. They found a new normal for them.

Never once did he bring up her letter saying she loved him and she never said if she heard him in the hospital finally saying the words his heart always felt. When the time was right then the conversation would happen. No matter what he was thankful for her being alive and well.

He looked up when he heard the door opening to the behavioral health center signaling (Y/N)’s last group had ended. Dean’s lips curled into a wide grin as she hugged the few friends she had made before running over to him. She jumped into his opened arms hugging him tightly while he spun her around.

“How was it, pretty girl?” he asked opening the passenger door for her.

(Y/N)’s smile never failed to brighten his day, “It was great and a little sad.”

He quickly got in Baby bringing her to life, “Well you know it’s not goodbye, just see ya later. It’s important for you to have friends outside of hunters.”

She nodded, “Yeah, I know and I will still see Tabby for my weekly sessions. Just a new step to go up but I have a great support system.”

“Yes you do. Now, we go to celebrate with burgers and shakes.” Dean pulled out from the parking lot heading towards their favorite diner in town.

Once they put in their order, he felt the table shaking from (Y/N) bouncing her leg beneath it. Dean reached over placing his hand on top of hers, “Are you okay?”

(Y/N) chuckled, “Yeah. Sorry, there’s just something I want to talk to you about and I’m kind of nervous.”

He smiled softly at her masking the fear tightening around his chest, “Don’t be nervous. I’m here for you no matter what.”

She took a deep breath squeezing his hand, “One of the things I have been working on with Tabby is learning how to express my emotions. I have been burying some emotions for so long that I didn’t know how to tell anyone especially to the person I needed too.”

Dean’s felt his heart beating against his chest as each word flowed from her lips. Keep breathing. Keep calm. Be strong for her. Be here for her.

“See I have feelings for someone and I didn’t feel it was right to tell him until after my program was done.” (Y/N)’s cheeks were turning a beautiful shade of rose and she was biting her lower lip.

He took a deep breath, “S-So you told him your feelings today?”

“Not yet…” Her bright eyes connected with his, “Dean?”

“Yeah?” he squeezed her hand showing he was there for her even though the pain in his chest was agonizing.

“You know I love you.” There was a brief moment of silence between them.

“Yeah, I know.” Smiling for her as his mind screamed from his heart breaking.

(Y/N) shook her head, “No Dean, you read my letter and you know I love you. I understand that you don’t return the feelings since you’ve never brought it up and that’s okay. I want you to know it’s okay that you don’t love me back in that way. I’ve worked through it while in group and I don’t want you to think you have to be on eggshells around me.”

His eyes widened before his body was sliding out of his booth and sitting next to her. Both hands came around her face as his lips pressed against hers. (Y/N) sat still for a moment before she started to kiss him back. Her fingers clenching his jacket pulling him as close to her as possible.

Someone cleared their throat catching their attention as their waitress brought their meals. Dean felt his own cheeks turning the same color as (Y/N)’s as the waitress laughed softly walking away.

“Dean…” He placed a finger on her lips.

“I love you too, (Y/N). I’ve been in love with you for awhile now. I’ve never acted on it because…” now she placed her finger on his lips.

“It doesn’t matter. There is nothing we can do about the past. All we have power over is this moment right now. I say we enjoy our first pancake date and then go back to the Bunker to marathon All Saint’s Day.”

He leaned over kissing her again, “That sounds perfect to me.”

As they were walking towards Baby, hand in hand, he twirled her around wrapping his arms around her waist, “By the way, I’m never going to let you go.”

“I’m thankful for that.” she whispered as he pressed his lips to her temple.

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[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching SPN 15x04 “Atomic Monsters”

in which Jensen’s directing blows my mind a little bit?? holy shit. also Dean is only eating phallic things... and the writer in me is reeling. SOMEONE TELL ME THAT WAS JENSEN SINGING THAT SONG PLEASE

--

07:01pm

mostly what i wanna do right now is eat and watch queer eye buuuut i guess i should watch this first. hopefully it’s fun?? i do not want my heart ripped out or to be squicked right now

-

07:04

oh no........ becky

i like her as a character but ew ew ew all of her life choices and the way she treats sam

fingers crossed for character development

PLEASE DON’T DIE

i mean .....i don’t LIKE her but still

-

07:08

i can’t tell if the audio on my video file is fucked up or whether there’s supposed to be a voiceover here while dean’s shooting people while wearing a very nice beard

because it’s very much drowned out

-

07:10

oh hey benny

soooo this is some kind of au fic maybe

-

i uh.... fully expected dean to kiss benny right then

-

07:13 

definitely a voiceover drowned out on purpose

vaguely heard “title” as the titlecard came up

okay, interesting

-

07:15

DEAN GOT VEGGIE BACON

yee

-

sam: YOU GOTTA STOP CALLING YOURSELF THE MEAT MAN, IT DOESN’T MEAN WHAT YOU THINK IT MEANS

OHHHHH SAMMY No i think he knows exactly what it means, and what it sounds like

-

dean: yeah it does

TOLD YOU. bi baby

-

07:18

real bacon

DEAN YOU VEGETABLE-HATING ASSHOLE

-

07:22

dean and his flask this season..... guess he’s gone back to quiet alcoholism

-

07:23

wow........ becky has not aged a DAY

-

07:27

becky: they just sit around and do laundry and talk

okay NOW i relate to becky

thank youuuu davy perez for letting her grow and recognize her awful awful awful mistakes

-

chuck: eeeeeeh, people like monsters

becky: meh

HELL YEAH

i mean i love monster stories but i love laundry more

-

07:29

there’s a tall cas doll in becky’s bookshelf, yay~

which.... honestly looks like a white tennis ball on a roll of paper with wings attached but still

-

07:33

cas is gone and dean is eating SO MUCH

> meat man bacon (textual penis euphemism)

> pretzels (twisted, salty rather than sweet, metaphor for Not Straight)

> alcohol (DESPAIR)

> hot dog (phallic)

-

i can’t put screenshots on my posts anymore bc tumblr sucks BUT

as dean’s sitting with the hot dog, in the shot that contains sam, there’s BISEXUAL BICYCLES

-

07:40

sam holds a hyponeedle behind his back

i’m wondering if they’d become a little out of character if chuck is writing them again

-

07:42

i’d say the orchid is significant

there’s a pink one in the house of the dad/mom/son, and the speech-making cheerleader mentioned ghost orchids

edit: nah

-

07:44

aww there’s a lil cas pop figure thingy!!! yay team free will!!!

-

07:45

chuck: fan..fic. it’s not really the same

becky: writing’s writing!!

YES BECKY

-

07:52

becky: no-one even mentions cas

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS BECKY

-

07:54

flashback to the son biting the girl’s neck, the music kind of halfway there

the directing of this is fascinating

like a music video, it’s ethereal

and... you know when you hear JUST enough of a good chord from a song but you don’t hear the rest and it’s like MMM but just an inch away from satisfying but not in a bad way?? like breathing in a meal you’re not going to eat. like walking past a bakery and not going inside. you want it but you can’t have it, IT TEASES

AND I JUST LOOKED UP THE DIRECTOR AND IT’S JENSEN

WOW. OKAY DUDE 3000 KUDOS TO YOU

this isn’t a tv show, it’s art. like. he just made art. wow 

wowow

-

there are SO MANY LAYERS HERe, particularly in the audio

the kid talking, chuck’s voiceover, the music in the truck, the heartbeat and roaring sound effects, the kid and the girl breathing and grunting in the flashback

it’s like... sensory overload but at the same time it’s delicious

.....you know what?? this scene is beyond incredible, because not only is is beautiful for what it is, but also for what it represents

because i was just thinking that this feeling, this blast and blur of ALL THE THINGS ALL AT ONCE AT THE APEX OF EMOTION feels exactly like the part where i’m writing a story and everything’s happening so fast and i gotta type AS THINGS ARE HAPPENING and words just flood from my fingertips and my heart is pounding and the world no longer exists, i’m kind of out of my body but no longer have a body

and

like

that’s literally what’s happening. all of this. is chuck writing in that exact moment, unresponsive to becky, WRITING THINGS INTO EXISTENCE

i told my family a while ago, there are some stories only a Writer can write. when they write about being a Writer and you can tell it’s so personal and would be related to the most by other writers. and davy perez has done exactly this here, with becky being us, the fandom, but then there’s THIS

that flood of Everything All At Once is illustrated PERFECTLY, not just in the text, but the way jensen obviously understood the feeling and illustrated it in such a way that i didn’t even remember the layer of this story where chuck’s writing until i was all “hey this feels like that writer thing” and IT’S EXACTLY THAT

this is mind-blowing a little bit??? i really really love this

goddamn

-

08:09

ooooooh a vampire trying to save the winchesters from humans

-

08:11

.....who’s singing this song? kind of?? sounds like jensen???

it’s probably not jensen but 100% chance he picked the song

that long note as the girl’s taken out on the stretcher. oh man it REALLY sounds like jensen

....i listened again and....... the word “SOUnds”

no, yeah, that’s jensen. the way he kind of hurls a big note up through his chest yet it comes out soft with just that teeeeny touch of huskiness?? that’s gotta be jensen

if it’s not jensen i’ll be v surprised. might be a friend of his maybe. but there’s a personal connection there definitely

edit: NO IT HAS TO BE JENSEN. IT IS RIGHT??? SOMEONE TELL ME IT IS

*misha at jibcon voice* we get a tingly feeling when we hear it so we know it’s you

-

08:17

becky: it’s AWFUL. HOPELESS. you can’t do this to the fans

i can’t tell if that textual awareness combined with my dread about the upcoming ending of the show makes me glad the writers understand, or worried that they understand but are gonna give us a dark, hopeless ending anyway

-

08:20

did the voiceover just say “bexy becky”

-

08:23

dean: now that chuck’s gone... we are..... finally free

oh no baby

oh no

-

08:26

laughing bc the ending was just “next to him sit dean and sam bobbleheads”

the end

guess it’s kind of a cause-and-effect thing. chuck types, they wobble

-

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MAN

at least becky’s not dead right?? at least according to chuck talking about her family

CHUCK IS THE ABSOLUTE WORST.

i’m so glad becky is a stable, healthily creative human who obeys consent now and is repulsed by what she did to sam

i probably don’t need to say it again but the directing in this was phenomenal, if highly unusual compared to other episodes. there was a lot of... force in it? actually now i think it about it, it had jensen’s energy. smooth and flowing with smacks of Hell Yeah and some twangs of discomfort thrown in.

also dean’s food was phallic, fight me

i think the bicycles thing probably meant less than the food did, jensen’s way more straightforward with his dick jokes. like, if he’s gonna be gay, he goes for it, doesn’t hide it in the background. someone else put those bicycles there, and he was probably like “ok sure”.

(also? dean’s “nice beaver” quip, followed by the fact that THE PERSON INSIDE THE BEAVER FURSUIT IS A GUY)

i bet i’m gonna get on tumblr after this and someone’s gonna be like “hey here’s the song that was in this episode and yeah it’s off jensen’s new album”

i’m interested to see where this story goes next. but also WOW, i’m not into the fact chuck is manipulating the storyline again and the winchesters aren’t aware of it. curious flip regarding consent issues, with chuck and becky. now chuck’s the violator and becky’s the voice of reason

anyway this was 10/10, and i’m happy to report that after i got past the scene with the red lights in the bunker, and made it to the brothers eating bacon, i’d completely forgotten i wanted to be watching something else and began to fully enjoy this episode~ yay

[bakubitch-minusultra]

Not Alone: Chapter Ten

-> an apocalyptic series with bnha characters but without quirks because I'm the writer and i can do whatever the fuck i want :3 yo im so sorry for not posting this yesterday i had two softball games and when i got home i just wanted to relax so i hope this makes up for it <3

-> Word Count: 2.1k

-> Warnings: the infected, thas bout it lol

-> Taglist: @5sosfckss @laudthingcat @zphilophobiaz

Y/n woke up to a wolf paw in her face. Hades kicked slightly in his dream and scratched her cheek. She pushed it away and looked around. She was more comfortable than she had ever been, since before.

Jirou was passed out with her arms around Hades. He loved to snuggle when he slept. Y/n smiled, knowing that he was getting more comfortable in the new space.

The light of day was filtering in through the canvas of the tent. It was small and cozy in the tent and the air had grown stale with the three of them breathing in it.

She stretched and realized what she was wearing. It was a loose t-shirt with the word ‘hide’ on it, the shirt was black and too big for her. She was also wearing jeans with tears and holes on the knees. She felt a bit of a breeze in the back felt around her but to discover holes back there as well. She frowned. She needed her pants back.

“You’re finally up.”

Y/n turned around to see Bakugo smiling at her. He was beautiful. She couldn’t stop herself from gawking at him in his black t-shirt with a skull design and his dark gray sweatpants. His eyes met hers and he noticed the way her eyes traveled his body.

“How come you get pants with no holes?”

He laughed, “We only have so many clothes. The last trip to a mall was three years ago. We share everything.”

Y/n glanced at Mary who was snuggled against a guy holding the little brat, “Everything.”

He turned to see what Y/n was watching and he laughed again, “Not not everything. She’s just really friendly Y/n. She’s like that with everyone. But if you’re interest we have a few girls who’re single.”

“What?”

“If you’re interested.”

Y/n shook her head, “I don’t know what you mean.” Bakugo laughed at her. He was in on a joke that she was not.

He sighed, “So want to go over the map with me?”

“I told you last night, I don’t know maps. I know where I’ve been by remembering the woods.”

“What?”

Y/n pointed to the tent, “I need her to stay here and be protected. She’s sixteen. She’s lived a hard life.”

Bakugo made a face that made Y/n laugh, “Yeah I figured she was staying.”

“Her mom and aunt just died, Her other aunt was taken to the breeder farms.”

His red eyes sparkled, “She’s just our kind of girl then.”

She was confused by him, but she didn’t have time to figure him out. She couldn’t get the picture of him playing the guitar in the firelight out of her head. It was almost like there were two of him inside of his body. Sweet Bakugo and Business Bakugo.

Mary came over carrying the monster.

“Andy, what do you have to say to Y/n?”

The boy looked down at the ground and pouted, “Sorry.”

He fidgets with her blouse and looks up to meet Y/n’s frown with a smile.

“Okay thanks.” Bakugo and Mary laughed. “Mary, will you watch Jirou until I get back?”

She leaned up and hugged Y/n, “Be safe Y/n and hurry back.”

Y/n hugged her back. She still hugged like an iron rod. She noticed the waay Mary hugged like a person and she hugged like a robot. She hugged just like Mina and her heart hurt thinking about them.

She turned and opened the tent, “I’m leaving Jirou. You need to stay here and help out okay. They need the extra hands.”

Jirou woke up and instantly gave Y/n a snarl, “No. I’m coming with you.”

Y/n shook her head, “No you need to stay and hang with Mary. I’m taking Bakugo to the farmhouse. I’ll be back in a couple days.”

She layed back down, “Fine.”

Y/n looked at Hades, “You coming or staying?” He stretched out on the sleeping bags and snuggled into Jirou who laughed.

“He likes me better.”

Y/n rolled her eyes, “Traitor. She zipped the tent back up and walked back to Bakugo, whose eyes sparkled in the morning light. “What?”

Bakugo shook his head, amused by Y/n for something, “You’re funny Y/n.”

Xxxx

The walk back down the mountain was less painful and considerably faster than the walk up. Her feet didn’t hurt and Bakugo kept a fast pace. Unlike Jirou, he never spoke.

When they made it back to the meeting tree, they both paused and listened. She led across the open field with a sprint. They made it to the edge of the field and crouched down to look for any signs of life in the driveway. The barn swung open and shut. They’re back. She knew that she sealed the barn door completely when she left. She could hear Bakugo’s breath on the back of her neck as she watched the house silently.

She turned and whispered, “Let me go look first.”

He shook his head and pointed to the barn door. She turned and looked again.

She almost jumped when she saw them. It felt as though they were watching her. As the barn door swung open and shut a pair of eyes watched from inside. Stains of bloody tears streaked the gaunt cheeks below.

Her stomach twists and turns and she backed up but Bakugo put his arm on her to stop her from running away,

“Stay still.” His words made her skin shiver, as his hot breath landed on the back of her neck. Y/n didn’t move. The barn door opened and closed several more times. Then suddenly it opened and the eyes were gone.

She looked up at the loft window to see the thin figure pass by it. The window overlooked the field perfectly. They would be seen. Suddenly she was on the ground, in the hay and wrapped up in Bakugo’s long body. He held her close to him.

The wind played with the hay around them, it whispered to them.

She could feel his heart beating against her chest. They were face to face but her eyes darted around them. She heard footsteps. She heard something else, it was the way an exhale sounded when your throat was a ragged mess.

The infected were near them. She wanted to pull her shirt over her face. She wanted to run. She needed her mask but she had left it behind. Another rule she had broken.

Bakugo stroked his thumb along the back of her neck, where his left hand lay. He was trying to calm her nerves, before she gave away our location. In the gusts of warm wind and the calm silence of the ragged exhales, she heard a sound she didn’t expect. It was the hollering of men and the high moans of the infected.

The footsteps left the hay around us. The moaning and ragged breath became harder to hear, as distance was put between them.

Bakugo whispered into her forehead, “Oh my fucking god.” They laid in silence for a moment. He peeked his up to look around but she pulled him back down.

“One more minute.” He frowned but as she spoke the barn door closed several times hard. A raucous noise filled the air, different types of commotion began after it. “We need to leave now.” She whispered into his throat.

He pulled back a bit and looked at her, almost looking through her with his intensely red eyes. He tilted her chin with his free hand and lightly feathered his lips against mine. His kiss wasn’t intense like Kirishima’s was or soft like Mary’s. It was somewhere in the middle and filled with more of everything. He kissed beside her mouth and whispered into her cheek, “We’re going to crawl from here and then make our way to the forest on the other side from where we came. We don’t want to lead them to the camp.”

He kissed once more just along the side of her lips and let her out of his firm grip. He moved away from her and slithered backwards, away from the farmhouse. She followed him. The hay slicing along her skin gave her small cuts. When they got to the halfway point between the forest and farmhouse, Bakugo stood and hunched over. She did the same, listening intently to every sound.

They made their way into the forest where he broke into a run. She followed him until they reached the bigger trees. He climbed one of them quickly. She looked around and started to feel uncomfortable. She didn’t like to be on the ground without Hades. She climbed the next largest tree and scrambled up the branches until she was as high as he was.

The farmhouse, her farmhouse, was nearly entirely in view. She could see the field she had crossed too many times to count. Pain crept around inside of her as she imagined her bunker and rations and her clean little spaces, all torn apart by the infected.

“So Mina and Kirishima were here with you?” His voice betrayed his lack of hope.

She nodded. She saw a small cluster of men fighting the infected like fools. They would get sick. They would become infected and maybe they would die because not everyone was able to live with running sores and bloody tears.

“God, they should have run.” She recognized one of them. He was the man who shouted the loudest when the man with the evil grin peed on the fire. The man who pulled down her pants.”

“Those men held me captive. They’re the others.”

“Do you know where their camp is?”

“Yup. I’d like to avoid it.”

“What if they have Kirishima and Mina?”

The pain in his eyes hurt Y/n somehow, “I never said I was going to avoid it. I said I’d like to. I’m betting they have Kirishima and Mina.” She took one last look and knew it would be a long time before she ever came back,, if she ever did. She took her last look at the white siding and the small windmill in the front yard waved goodbye to her. As her feet made their way back down the tree, she saw something that made her feel the smallest amount of fear and hope simultaneously. On the ground is a small bandage and above it was a broken branch. She looked deeper into the forest and saw another broken branch. “They got away. They’re this way.” She pointed.

Bakugo looked at the bandage and scoffed, “Y/n that could belong to anyone.”

She shook her head,”No it’s not. It’ll smell like tea tree and the branches,” She pointed to them, “I told Kirishima it was howI always found my way through the woods.”

He bent his face to the ground and sniffed the air around the bandage, “It’s tea tree.” Y/n turned to run, but he grabbed her arm as he stood and pulled her into him. “One thing first.” He put his hands on the small of her back and lifted her into his arms. His lips met hers with desperation and excitement. His tongue slipped into her mouth, caressing hers. He sucked and nibbled on her lower lip as his hand rubbed her back. Suddenly his hands made their way lower and didn’t feel uncomfortable as he cupped her ass and lifted her into him/ He wrapped her legs around him. She was feeling the way she used to when she read the romance novels stored at the cabin. She felt a heat rising low in her belly.

He let her slide down his body, till her feet touched the ground again. Air rushed between them. She opened her eyes, not realizing she had closed them, and looked up into his face.

He grinned, “I’m going to have a hard time staying focused.” Y/n giggled like a schoolgirl. It was the first time that sound had left her lips. He kissed her softly one last time and walked away toward the broken branches and Y/n followed. “I never imagined they were alive. I went back to where they were when I got taken and I couldn’t find them. I knew Kirishima wasn’t very responsible- well neither of us were.” He ran a hand through his blonde shaggy hair.

“Mina told me you guys were pretty bad at paying attention.”

He chuckled and Y/n caught herself staring at his butt. It was round and firm and when he took a step, it moved in a way she enjoyed. She realized when she watched him, that she felt a small amount of guilt. Kirishima kissed her too. Kirishima made her smile and made her laugh.

Bakugo made her scared of him but safe against the world, where as Kirishima made her feel the opposite.

[kdfrqqg]

Left alone

Dean x Reader

Warnings: SMUT, PWP

Word Count: 1.5K

A/N: This was written for @hopes-archer Dice challenge.  My prompts were massage wand vibrator, kitchen counter then floor and “I know for a fact you can be a hell of a lot louder than that.”

No beta, all mistakes are mine.

---

The bunker was quiet, Sam had left yesterday morning to go to some film festival and no one had heard from Cas in a about a week or two.  You and Dean were more than happy to walk around like you were on permanent vacation in your underwear with only a loose robe to cover up.  The two of you would take your meals together but spend the rest of your time in your separate bedrooms since not much else was going on.

There was only so much Netflix you could watch before boredom took you over.  Stripping out of what little clothes you had on, you told ‘Alexa’ to play something sensual, and grabbed your favorite toy from the bedside drawer.  The massage wand was a life saver not just during your personal times but also after particularly difficult hunts and your muscles were sore.  

On top of the sheets, your body slivered to the music as you ran the wand over your shoulders and chest while your other hand wandered over all your delicate parts.  Imagines of the sexy damn hunter down the hall filled your brain.  The way he licked his lips, his strong large hands, how he winked at you when he was little drunk.  You let the recently remembered smell of gunpowder and coffee completely intoxicate you as you daydreamed about Dean taking you in the backseat of Baby and him talking dirty to you.  Small fingers dipped into your core feeling your perfect wetness, the wand drifted over your clit, making you pant and squeeze your eyes tightly together.  Your whimpers and whines were low, you had never been particularly loud in bed.

Everything was feeling right, the pads of your fingers dragged juices up over your lips and to your clit making the perfect friction, the vibrations were making you start to see stars as all your sweet spots were being hit.

The handle to your door turned,  “Sweetheart, I’m going to go out and get a drink.” The door flung open, “You wanna join?”

You eyes opened in complete shock, “Oh shit!” You body clinched and seized up as your climax hit you just at the same time he walked in.  

His eyes raked over your form, it was clear he walked in on an intimate moment but you looked beautiful coming from your own touch.  Legs flailing, you couldn’t do anything but ride it out, you couldn’t move, in your embarrassment, you reached out for the bed spread pulling it over your form before sliding, ok, falling off the bed to hide your shame. “Dean, what the hell?”  A loud noise was coming from the vibrator as it still remained on after it hit the hardwood floor, you turned it off to try and end the humiliation faster, chucking it away from you.  Frustrated huffs and puffs came from you which only made Dean chuckle. “Seriously, whatever happened to privacy and knocking?” You yelled as you moved the blanket out of your face to glare at him.

His held his hands up in defense, “I know, I know. I’m sorry but damn that was hot.”

“Dean Winchester, get out!”

“Oh come on.  I just think I found my entertainment for the evening.” He looked at your beautifully flushed skin and sucked his bottom lip in his mouth showing off his top pearly whites.  

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

He moved closer to the bed and reached down to grab the discarded sex toy. “This thing looks like fun.”

“Hey!” You tried to move but kept getting tripped up on the blanket. Dean slowly backed away from you then made a mad dash out the door.  “Dean, you ass.” You made it to your feet and followed him tightening the sheets and blankets around you as you chased him down the hallway.

He laughed like a child, turning the device on and off while running to the kitchen.

“You are so gross, you know that right?  That’s used vibrator.  It’s not even clean, dude.” The sheets dragged on the floor as you picked up the pace to catch him.

Two firms hands grabbed your waist when you crossed the kitchen threshold, “What if I want to use it on you?” He purred. Blinking in total utter disbelief.  “I think I found my play toy for the evening, why would I want to go out now?” Dean continued moving his face closer to the nape of your neck.  “Who were you thinking about?”

“That’s private, dumbass.” You pushed him back but you didn’t get very far before he was pressing you gently against the counter.

“Private!” He scoffed, “That means it was someone I know. Was it Sammy?” Your titled glare told him no. “Ok, not Sammy, then Cas? Women really do like him.” You crossed your arms, trying not to tell him anything but he read you like a book. “Well Darlin’, that means there is just one person left.” His lips came closer to yours, “If you were thinking about me, you could have just slipped into my room because I know for a fact you can be a hell of a lot louder than that.”  A timid kiss was placed on your lips. “Tell me, you were thinking about me?”

You nodded finally your voice caught up. “Yes.” It was but a whisper.

He moaned, pushing you closer to him, “I knew it.” A warm hand touched your chin before wrapping around into your hair, his kiss was all teeth and tongue. The sheets feel to the ground, your hands reached up pulling him down to you in complete passion.  Dean moved his hands over your naked body, a firm grip on your waist lifted you up on the counter with a grunt from him and a yelp from you.  “I want to hear you.” He nestled himself between your legs and turned the massager back on.

You gulped, “Hear me?”

“Yes, Sweetheart.  I want to hear you.” He pressed the toy to you mound just above your clit.  “I think I just had a taste of what you sound like.  I’m going to need more now.” Dean continued to move the massager down now touching your sweet spot and kissed you deeper as you hung on still not sure that you weren’t dreaming.  

You were overly stimulated already from your alone time but the way he was kissing and touching you had you whimpering quickly trying to hold back your second release of the evening.  Arching your neck back you head landed against the cabinet door, “Shit, shit Dean. I-I-I can’t…”

His mouth captured yours, “Sure you can, just let go.  You’re so gorgeous.” He kissed down your neck and chest encouraging you to cum again.

“Ahhhh Dean,” Your nails dug into his shoulders, “oh my God!” A loud moan was forced from your belly as all your muscles contracted while you closed your eyes seeing a bright lights.  Dean watched you in awe and kept talking, working you gently through your orgasm.  Your body slumped forward, “I got you.” He caressed your back as he pulled you from the counter making sure you were ok to stand.

“Dean, I want you now.” You growled, working his layers of shirts over his head.

“Yeah so soon?”

“Yeah! I want to ride you.” He kicked quickly out of his boots after your admission making you giggle at his excitement.

“Darlin’, I’m all yours.” Stripping as fast as he could.  

Legs and limbs tangled rolling to the floor on top of the plush blanket and sheet.  Dean laid out gazing up at you as you straddled him.  His heavy cock was hard pressed next to his stomach your slick teased over his length, enjoying the feeling of him before you fucked the shit out him.

Taking ahold of his manhood, you lined up his shaft with entrance feeling the delicious burn of him stretch your pussy.  “Fuck, (Y/N/N)! Damn, you feel good.”

“You ready?” You asked.

“Ready!” He moaned.

Hands pressed firmly to his chest as you lifted yourself up and down over his cock, taking a little bit more of him each time you came down on him.  “You’re really good at this.”

“You ain’t seen nothing yet, Baby.” The smirk on your face told him he would be sore in all the best ways in the morning.

“Dean! (Y/N)!” Sam called out from the War room. “I’m back.”

“Ah shit!” You cussed and Dean also said a few choice words as you dismounted and covered yourself up. “If we run, we can make it back to your room before he finds us.”  Both of you grabbed all your stuff off the ground and made a run for it.  Laughing and smiling the whole time down the hall, Sam had rounded the corner to the kitchen just in time to watch your sheet wrapped bodies making a sprint from the room.

The makeshift coverings were discarded quickly as soon as he and you made it to his bedroom, “Now where were we.” Dean pulled you into a rough kiss.

“You were about to give me orgasm three or maybe four of the evening.”

“That’s right, Sweetheart.  And tomorrow, I’ll give you just as many.”

You smiled knowing that he was a man that always kept his promises, “Dean Winchester, I think you may have just ruined me for other men.”

---

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Dean only

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[gii-heylittleangel]

Hey guys, I’m back with another Weekly Words for the Writers of Destiel Discord and this week’s was “I Wish”. I hope you like it because this one was very good to write, I got all of it in a few hours. 

Read it on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19139998 or keep reading here

Dean hasn’t been feeling like himself these last couple of days—no, scratch that—months, he hasn’t been feeling like himself for months. A few weeks ago, Dean thought he would finally begin to feel like himself again, because they had finally found Cas after spending so much time worrying and looking for him. Dean really believed they would be together after that and that they could go back to the routine they had before Cas left him—that they could go back to how they were, no matter what happened before. But fate, as always, had other plans, because, only a few hours after Dean finally saw Cas again and they were able to simply be together and hold each other’s hands, real life came in, knocking down everything in its way—Mary, Kelly, Crowley, Cas.

Dean lost everyone on that day, saw all of them be taken away from him. He lost his mom because she walked right to Lucifer and punched him in the face to save him and Sam; he lost Crowley, who sacrificed himself to help them keep the Devil away from their world; he lost Kelly, who spent so many months suffering, with everyone wanting to get between her and her son. And then he lost Cas, who went to hold Lucifer so Dean and Sam could get away from the apocalyptic world, so they could have a shot of getting out of there alive, even if that meant Cas himself could die. Dean saw Cas being stabbed through the back, his life being burned away from his body, leaving only the empty shell on the ground, the shell that Dean loved for so long and that he had to burn. And, as he watched it burn, it made him realize that this time was the last time he would see Cas, that his angel would never come back.

He doesn’t know how he managed to keep it together after that—or if he even did— how he was even able to stand up, walk, drive, speak, eat. He doesn’t even remember most of the things he did after he knelt beside Cas’s lifeless body, his heart breaking into a million pieces. He only knew he had to keep the facade up so Sam wouldn’t know how much he was suffering inside. He also had other things to worry about, so he boxed all of his feelings up until he could morn all his losses without anyone knowing.

After they finally went to the bunker, Dean broke down as soon as he entered his and Cas’s room, and saw the little notes Cas left for him when Dean wasn’t there, always saying something that made Dean smile, even if it was a simple ‘Hello, Dean’, that was enough to brighten up his day. Dean never found the courage to take them off, especially after Cas left. Some of them had lost their glue and fell on the floor, and Dean would only take it and put on his nightstand, reading them every time he missed Cas—which was very often. But even with all the good memories, those notes only made Dean feel worse.

Dean doesn’t even know how long he spent knelt, crying, after he closed the door. He punched the floor, breaking the skin of his hands; he prayed to Chuck to bring all of them back, saying he owned them for leaving them; he cried even more when nothing happened. After all of that, every time he thought he would be able to finally stop crying, he would look around and see something else that reminded him of Cas, until he couldn’t take it anymore—he knew he wouldn’t be able to stay in their room, not at that moment at least.

He grabbed some clothes from his closet and went to the room they used for movie nights, deciding he wouldn’t be able to sleep in his own, even with his so loved memory foam. He couldn’t stay there, remembering all the silly moments he had with Cas, the confessions they had late at night when Dean couldn't sleep and the tiny little things that Cas did there to make it his room too—to make it their room.

Dean had been avoiding his room the most ever since, only going there when he needed to get clothes or some book he forgot there, but, otherwise, he kept his distance from it, doing his best not to even get close to it if he could help it. He keeps the spaces he can go in the bunker low, going to the kitchen, the garage, the bathroom, the war room and the room he has been sleeping in, and also doing his best to keep his mind occupied and not have to think about anything that may make him break down.

He spent his time uploading Men of Letter’s files to the server Sam created for them, so it would be easier to find whatever they could want; he cleaned rooms he and Sam had never been and didn’t know existed; he fixed all of the cars in the garage, taking them for drives every week; he has also been cooking a lot, hoping that, even if it reminds him of Cas, it’ll be enough to keep his mind focused on only one thing.

If Sam noticed anything strange with Dean’s behavior, he didn’t comment on it, leaving his brother to mourn the way he wants. He took Jack on hunts, knowing he couldn’t leave him with Dean and that Dean would probably feel better if he was alone in the bunker. Sam sent Jody, Donna, Alex, and Claire to keep an eye on him or just stay a few hours with him so he wouldn’t feel so lonely. Dean appreciated it, especially for having comfort and the knowledge that there are people who still care about him, no matter how much he tried to isolate himself.

This week, Sam and Jack are out on a hunt on the other side of the country, which means Dean has plenty of days alone—or at least until one of the girls come to check on him. Sam and Jack left a couple of days ago and Dean promised he would do some research to help them with their hunt, so Dean walks to the kitchen with some books and his laptop, so he can do what he needs for Sam and still get overdosed with coffee.

Dean manages to find and send all the information Sam may need about everything that has happened n the city before he finishes the coffee pot. He thinks that maybe he should have taken longer because now he doesn’t know what to do to keep his mind busy and not let it start throwing memories at him—memories he doesn’t want to see because he knows it’ll only make him suffer more. He decides to stay in the kitchen, looking at news and trying to find any strange deaths, until he finishes with his coffee pot.

He finds two different mysterious deaths, one on the south and one in west-center of the country. He sends each for different hunters to check on it and see if it’s anything supernatural or just the normal freaks things that happen in the world. He puts everything in its place after he’s done, walking to the war room and sitting on one of the chairs.

He rests his elbows on the table and buries his head on his hands, trying to think what he could do to get busy now: there's nothing to cook, all the cars are clean and running smooth, the rooms that need cleaning he needs to wait for Sam and Jack to make sure there's nothing cursed there and that it's safe to go in and there are no documents to put in the server. Dean sighs and does his best not to think about Cas or anything that may be related to the angel—Dean has suffered enough on the first days after Castiel’s death, he doesn’t need more of it.

After he takes a few deep breaths, he raises his head, looking around the war room, even though he knows that there’s nothing to occupy his mind at the moment. He turns his head to look the path that leads to the bedrooms and thinks that maybe he should gather enough courage to face whatever is hidden behind the door to his room—he can’t keep hiding forever and sooner or later he’ll have to face it and it’s better if it’s when he wants, when he knows he’ll face it and not when he’s taken by surprise.

He doesn’t know how long he stays in that position, just staring at the hallway that leads to the rooms and trying to decide if he should or if he shouldn’t go. He gets startled when his phone starts to ring, breaking the trail of thought he was in. He blinks a few times and sees Sam’s name written on the phone, so he picks it up and answers it.

“Hey, Sammy. Everything okay there?”

“Hey. Yeah, yeah everything’s fine. Jack and I just got back to the motel after interviewing the witness and families of the people that got killed.”

Dean rubs a hand on his face. “That’s great, Sammy. Did you get my email?”

Sam hums. “Yep, I’m gonna go through it after we eat something. How are things there?”

“Fine, as always. Found two hunts and sent them to the hunters close to it. Just some vamps causing trouble.”

“That’s good.” Sam stays a few moments in silence like he’s thinking about what to say next. “Did you leave the bunker?”

Dean bites his lip, wondering if he should lie or just tell the truth. Sam will probably know if he lies so the truth may be better. “Nope, I’m waiting for the grocery list to grow a little more.”

Dean hears his brother sigh and knows he’s probably running a hand through his hair and trying to find a reason for Dean to get out of the bunker. “You should at least drive around, Dean. Being cooped up in the bunker isn’t good.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll leave sometime, don’t worry. I’ll let you get back to your research now. Call me if you need anything else.”

Dean hangs up before Sam can say anything else, holding the phone tightly between his hands. Dean takes a deep breath, raising his eyes again to the hallway, and decides to go to the room and face everything he has been running from for weeks before he can lose the little courage he has.

He stands up, putting his phone in his pocket and starts walking towards the hallway—dragging himself may be a better description but there’s no one there so Dean thinks it's okay to lie a little to himself. He slowly walks to his room, stopping in front of the closed door, staring at the five little letters carved on the top of the door—Cas and D.W. They decided to carve their names there after Cas finally moved into Dean’s room. They made the letters really tiny so only they would know they’re there, kinda like a secret that only they would know.

Dean stares at those letters for a while, his eyes tearing up as memories flood his mind. He raises his hand to the doorknob, closing his fingers around it and taking a deep breath before turning it and opening the door.

The room is exactly the way Dean left on the day he found Cas—the sheets on the bed are perfectly neat, there are some research papers on the bedside table from a hunt Dean had found and some clothes that Dean had separated for Cas when they came baçk on the chair.

Dean takes a deep breath, closing his eyes as his mind start to show him more images of the great memories he has with Cas in that room. But, for once, Dean doesn’t try to fight them, instead accepting them. He opens his eyes and gives the last steps until he is fully inside the room, looking around it, almost being able to smell Cas’s scent—something that resembles ozone and rain, but also a mild scent of cinnamon and coffee, two things that Cas always loved.

Dean walks to the bed, sitting on the edge of it, with his back to the door. He grabs the pillow that Cas uses, burying his face in it and inhaling deep. He can’t stop the tears that come with it and the dam inside of him breaks, all those weeks of trying to hide his feelings coming out all at once. Dean cries, sobbing into the pillow that still has Cas’s smell, thinking how he’ll be able to get through this or if he’ll ever be able to miss Cas just a little less.

He doesn’t know how long he stays sobbing into the pillow nor when he lay down on the bed. He just knows that his head started to hurt and that he feels exhausted like he just spent hours running. He turns on the bed until he’s facing the ceiling and tries to keep his mind blank, hoping that crying so much will make him feel better.

Unfortunately, the memories keep coming to him, making him feel worse than he was before. He remembers when he first said that he loved Cas, when they were fighting about something so stupid that escalated to an argument and Dean just blurted out that he loved Cas. He thinks that he never panicked so much before, as Cas’s eyes widened and his whole body stiffened. Dean thought he had screwed everything up that day, until Cas threw himself on top of Dean, crushing their lips together, making both of them fall on the floor. They didn’t even remember what they were fighting about after, laughing of how a fight could end up in a confession and then in sex.

Dean also remembers how many time he woke up to Cas staring at him with a soft smile on his face, saying ‘Hello, Dean’ as soon as the hunter’s eyes opened. Dean’s days always started better when that happened, leaving him with a smile all day long. Dean remembers the post-its Cas would leave around the room when he needed to leave before Dean was awake, or how he sometimes would wake Dean up with a cup of coffee or pancakes or bacon, especially after Dean came back from long and stressful hunts.

Dean cleans up the tears that start rolling down on his face, not wanting to cry more. He sniffles and stands up, going to the radio he keeps in his room. He turns it on and the last music he heard in it starts to play—Pink Floyd’s Wish You Were Here. Dean closes his eyes, listening to the first chords of the music, and remembered how Cas was head over heels by the band when Dean showed him and that his favorite song was this one. It was the last music they listened together before Cas left. Cas said that the song reminded him of them.

Dean sits on the bed again, singing along the song, with his eyes closed and focusing on how much he misses Cas. “I don’t think you can hear this, Cas, but I miss you so much that I don’t even know how to handle this empty feeling inside of me. I can’t even think about you that my heart tightens and I immediately start crying. I've never felt like this and I don't know how I'm supposed to deal with these feelings inside of me. You have no idea how much I wish you could come back, how hard I would fight if I knew just where to start looking for you.” Dean takes a deep breath, biting his lips to stop himself from crying. “I love you so much, Cas, I—” Dean’s voice break as a sob comes through his throat, stopping him from saying anything else. He buries his head on his hands, trying to stop himself from crying more.

For a few minutes, the only thing Dean hears is the last beats of the music, until it stops completely and a voice comes from the door. “I love you too, Dean.” Dean sits straight so fast that he almost falls from the bed, staring with big eyes the figure standing between the door frames.

Dean squints his eyes until he recognizes the man standing there and he just can’t believe his eyes. “Ca-Cas?”

Castiel smiles softly, entering the room. “Hello, Dean.”

Dean jumps from the bed, throwing himself on top of Cas and hugging him tightly. “You really are here, you’re not just a manifestation from my mind.” Cas nods, hugging Dean back. “How? How did you get back? We-we burned your body.”

Cas chuckles softly and shrugs. “Well, I managed to piss a cosmic entity so much that it decided to send me back to Earth.”

Dean lets go of Cas, putting his hands on the angel’s face. “I can’t believe you’re really here.”

“You should because I truly am here. And I don’t plan on leaving you again so soon.”

“You better not leave me, Cas, or I’ll piss off a cosmic entity and I don’t think anyone wants that.”

Cas smiles, putting one hand on Dean’s cheek and caressing it with his thumb. “I’m so sorry, Dean.”

Dean’s eyes tear up. “You don’t need to be sorry, it’s not your fault. Just promise me you won’t go out looking for the Devil so he can stab you again. I can’t lose you again, Cas.”

“I won’t, I promise. I just want to be with you now.”

Cas crushes their lips together, putting his arms around Dean again and tightening his embrace until all of the hunter’s body is touching his. Dean kisses him back, with the same intensity, like he needs Cas’s lips to be able to survive. And after everything he felt during these weeks, maybe he does need Cas’s lips, just as much as he needs oxygen to be able to survive.

[travllingbunny]

The 100 rewatch: 3x01/3x02 – Wanheda Part One and Two

My rewatch will have to be sped up so I could finish it before the season 6 premiere. I’ve seen up to 3x08, but from now on I have to watch more than one episode a day. I hope to be able to finish season 3 by the end of this week. Which means I’ll have to try to make my next posts shorter than this one, which I’m pretty sure is my longest rewatch review so far. Maybe I could try covering several episodes in one post to try not to repeat myself in the following reviews?

Season 3 is definitely my least favorite season of The 100, and so far, having rewatched half a season, I haven’t changed my mind on its quality. But, except for one instance of really lazy writing (which will, sadly, turn out to be something the writers like to do, since they did the same but in an even worse way in season 5), this two-parter was a solid opening to the season, which, unfortunately, started going downhill right after it.

Also, I only realized this on rewatch…. Clarke is Rapunzel?! Or anti-Rapunzel.

*These rewatch posts have spoilers for everything up to the end of season 5, and I may also mention stuff from the season 6 trailer. No spoilers for 6x01, and please don’t mention any if you reply or reblog with comments, I’m trying to avoid them (good luck to me on that).

3x01 Wanheda, Part One

Timeline: This is one of few episode reviews where it makes sense to start with this, because it’s the show’s first time-jump – it starts almost 3 months after the season 2 finale, or specifically 86 days,. In most other shows, this wouldn’t be considered a time jump, but most of The 100 episodes take place just a day or a few hours later (which was the case with the time that passed between the season 1 finale and the season 2 premiere), sometimes just a few minutes later (season 3 finale/season 4 premiere). It’s even notable and relatively rare when there is a week, or just two days between episodes. Although this is obviously nothing compared to the time jump in the season 4 finale (and, to an extent, season 5 finale – which was technically much bigger,, but only really counted for three characters), this time jump is still twice as long as the entirety of seasons 1 and 2, which lasted less than a month and a half.

The starting sequence is great, with Murphy with long shaggy hair and a beard, in a state of desperation after being locked up in the bunker for 86 days, to the point that he almost decides to shoot himself in the head. Similar to how Clarke almost shot herself in the head in the flashbacks in 5x01. Even the greatest of survivors come to the point when it’s just too much for a human being to bear. Clarke reached that point after a month of being not just all alone on a desert, radiation soaked planet, but likely to be all alone for at least 5 years, and even more likely to die of hunger, thirst or exposure. Murphy took 3 months, but was in situation where he didn’t lack food or drink or comfort – but isolation, without any human contact or entertainment, other than videos of a guy committing suicide because he felt responsible of the end of the world, has to be unbearable.

Introduction of Becca In one of the videos is good as we get more crucial info practically at the beginning of the season (and at the same time, not so good, because I can’t stand Becca and I’m really not fond of the entire storyline about the chip/Flame/Commanders).

Scenes in the mansion with Jaha and ALIE are really creepy, as we see just how much Jaha has become removed from reality and immersed in the City of Light. When Jaha explains the concept of COL, the prospect of getting rid of pain, hate and envy,  Murphy has maybe his best ever line, and pretty much his defining quote: “Pain, hate, envy… those are the ABCs of me. Take that and there’s nothing left.”

Getting thrown right into Camp Jaha, now called Arkadia, after 3 months, to see how much everyone’s lives have changed, works well for the most part (with one exception – see below). Jasper’s new look and attitude are shocking, but make sense. I don’t know if this is an unpopular opinion, but I think Jasper’s storyline was one of the best things in season 3 and even season 4, and I think it’s great that the show, for once, didn’t shy away from showing the consequences of emotional trauma (these people are teenagers who have been through terrible things in an extremely short time, it’s hard to believe everyone would soldier on and no one would break), and that they didn’t try to make a depressed person be more “likable” by being nice, even if it resulted in so many fans calling Jasper “annoying” and now showing any understanding for his mental health issues just because he wasn’t depressed in a nicer, more palatable way.

Raven’s story in seasons 3-4, which is also pretty good, also gets set up with a conversation with Abby about her pain, where Raven refuses an operation and they end up saying bad things to each other, as those two sometimes do. Raven calls out Abby on trying to hide from her own pain, too (over losing Clarke), which is a major theme this season. She also tells her she’s bad as both doctor and Chancellor, and much as I used to love Abby in S1 (and still like her) I’m afraid that this is least half-true since she’s sucked at politics most of season  2and 3. As a doctor, she’s good at healing people, but her bedside manner leaves a lot to be desired.

The show gets rid of the Raven/Wick romance plot (which had to be jettisoned due to Steve Talley being a terrible person IRL and tweeting racist “jokes”) in the best way it could, by referring to it in one line (according to Abby, Raven pushed Wick away) and never having him appear again.

They used “Add It Up” by Violent Femmes! And even Shawn Mendes’ cover worked well – his was a sad and plaintive ballad, as a contrast to the original, which is an energetic rock song. (I had no idea who Mendes was when I first watched this, but his cameo didn’t feel weird or out of place).

A huge plus because Emori makes a return. Also, Otan is introduced, who actually is her brother (it’s not just a classic thief/swindler thing where partners in crime are like “I’m an innocent damsel in distress and this dude is totally my brother…” thing).

There are several character introductions of characters that are varying degrees of interesting or not so interesting. Roan’s is especially intriguing right from the start, and there’s also Niylah, Becca and Gideon, and Gina. Speaking of…

My biggest problem with this episode is how weird and jarring it always felt that we just get introduced to Bellamy’s new girlfriend, a random character we’ve never met before and who doesn’t get developed at all. We know she’s nice and really into him, and he likes her fine enough, but there’s very little about their relationship that goes beyond very basic relationship-establishing stuff. This was all the more jarring because Bellamy had never previously been shown to have an actual girlfriend (rather than friends with benefits/fu*k buddies, which he had quite a few in season 1), and by what we know of his backstory and what we was like in season 1, I had always assumed he had never had a serious relationship or even a serious friendship, because he could never allow himself to trust people on the Ark, and he was too focused on protecting Octavia and keeping that huge secret. So for him to be a real relationship was a new development that I would have loved to actually see. And in general, how weird is it that the show seems to treat the love life of a major character – second protagonist as an afterthought, to the point that his relationships get developed completely off-screen and just get a few perfunctory scenes to establish “there was a time jump, it happened, this is a thing now, that’s all you need to know” (which was all the more jarring when Gina then got fridged just 3 episodes into the season). Hey, and just how weird would it be if the show did this TWICE? I have an idea why this happens – because neither of his relationships with Gina nor with Echo was ever treated by the show, as genuinely important or something we need to be invested in, but If I ever believed that Clarke and Bellamy were really totally platonic BFFs (because one major platonic relationship is not enough for Bellamy, who is one of the very few characters on the show who actually has a sibling, and his relationship with Octavia is also a major one the show focuses a lot..) and that the show wasn’t doing something else, I’d be really puzzled by such weird narrative choices.

·Raven teases Bellamy that Gina is “too good” for him. That may be because she is aware that he was “never as devoted to Gina” (compared to Clarke), as she taunts him as ALIE!Raven in 3x11.

Gina gives Bellamy Iliad as a gift, because his mother used to read it to him… an epic whose main theme is a warrior hero’s rage and all the mess it causes?

The Ice Nation aka Azgeda, after being referenced before, finally gets introduced (though Echo will get retconed revealed to be one of them), and I have very mixed feelings about this, because the oversimplified way the show tried to suddenly establish “Trikru=good Grounders, Azgeda=bad Grounders” in season 3 was kind of grating.

·Everyone is still bad at dealing with people with PTSD and mental health issues in general – as seen in the fact that they made the mistake to bring Jasper with them on a mission. This time, Bellamy had an inkling it was not a good idea, but Monty thought it would do Jasper good… and again, it didn’t end well.

Indra has changed her views a lot and is now the liaison between Trikru and the Arkers and o very friendly terms with Kane.

The relationship between Trikru and Arkadia is at this point kind of a mixed bag – they have a truce and cooperate, but there’s a problem of limited trade routes and ability for Arkers to get food, the Grounders are not happy with the prospect of them using Mount Weather, and Lexa has issued a kill order on Lincoln (which is why he has had to stay in Arkadia even if he didn’t want to – though it seems he does want to) just because he went back to help Arkers against Mount Weather (any disobedience of Commander’s orders, no matter how justified, is apparently punishable by death).

Something that’s annoying, but expected and in character: Octavia complaining about Lincoln wearing an Arkadia uniform and trying to integrate into the Arkadia society. It’s like she was so happy to be rebellious and have a cool Grouder boyfriend, and now she’s disappointed.  She tells him he will never be one of them (oh, the irony of this coming from Octavia, who says “I’m a Grounder” every second episode – which I don’t get, does she think being a Grounder is a lifestyle you can choose?) and even lectures him about the culture he grew up in: “At least you still speak our language” (meaning Grounder speech). LMAO

Octavia suggests they go off on their own and find Luna and her people – one of the many, many references to Luna going all the way back to season 1. No character has been set up so much long before they appeared.

It takes quite a long time for Clarke to actually appear in the episode, right after the revelation that she’s the titular Wanheda everyone is looking for.

About the nickname itself: Clarke herself hates it, of course (though she will kind of ‘reclaim’ it in 5x12) – because she feels deeply guilty and hates herself, but I’m sure that, for Grounders, “Commander of Death” an expression of awe and fear, not any kind of judgment, which wouldn’t make sense – we’ve seen multiple times that Grounders take the “kill them all If we can’t kill their leader” approach to their enemies, so I can’t see them being bothered by her killing all the Mountain Men. It’s the fact that she was able to destroy their old, powerful enemy that gives her a mythical aura. If you can kill the Mountain Men, you must be able to command death itself. They would also assign it all to Clarke, because, for starters, they weren’t there to know about Bellamy’s or Monty’s role, and secondly, Grounders tend to give all credit or blame to the leader, and they perceived Clarke as the sole leader of Skaikru during season 2.

This mythical status, however, merely makes Clarke a symbol and prize, due to the belief that killing someone means taking their power. (Which should also mean that she took the enormous power of Mount Weather in the eyes of the Grounders?) Does Queen Nia actually believe that she would literally take Clarke’s power if she killed her? I don’t know, but she probably just knows that people would perceive her as more powerful if she managed to do it.

Indra also explains that another reason the Ice Nation feels bold enough to make another move against Lexa/Trikru is that Clarke made Lexa look weak – which makes perfect sense, of course that’s what people would think after Lexa walked away from the battle and Clarke went in and killed the Mountain Men.

Seeing Clarke’s new look and persona was weird as hell the first time, but I don’t know how to feel about it as a plot point. I like it when characters’ traumas are not ignored, and it makes sense that, in her state, she wants to be anonymous and leave all she was behind. But Clarke as a great hunter after 3 months, making a living out of killing large animals? That’s a bit hard to believe. It’s not the first time the show is giving her unrealistic or, rapidly learned skills (overpowering an experienced warrior like Anya in a fight, apparently learning to ride a horse off-screen in a day, being such a good shooter to kill the MW sniper through Lincoln’s shoulder – after the short training she got from Bellamy in S1..) I complain about that with Octavia, so I should about Clarke, too (though it bothers me a lot more with Octavia since her being a great warrior  – with her few months of training -  is such a big part of her arc, while these skills are never supposed to be Clarke’s main strengths and don’t get much focus. But I like that she tells the panther “Your fight is over” while killing it.

Niylah, looking at Clarke’s back: “No kill marks”. Clarke: “My back is not big enough.”

Clarke sees Niylah has a wristband from one of the Delinquents, which is going to be a plot point in 3x11.

It’s nice to see someone expressing gratitude to Clarke for defeating the Mountain Men – Niylah says she appreciates it because her mother was a victim taken by Mount Weather. It would make sense if many more Grounders actually felt like that, but we don’t ever see many ordinary Grounders say anything about it. Usually it’s just Grounder leaders trying to make Clarke feel guilty over Mount Weather to manipulate her or excuse their own actions.

Clarke’s one night stand with Niylah is the first f/f sex scene in the show. It’s also, as far as we know, only the second time Clarke has had sex with anyone (the first one was way back in 1x04). At this point, Clarke can only bear to have physical intimacy, or any kind of human contact, if it’s not with anyone she has any stronger feelings for (and asks Niylah to stop talking before initiating sex, because she doesn’t want to risk any real intimacy). But at least Niylah is really nice and helpful, doesn’t cause drama and treats her better than any of her romantic partners have.

The first time I watched this, I found it funny that Clarke’s f*ck buddy got more screentime and development than Bellamy’s supposedly serious girlfriend.  But I didn’t know that the latter would die in two episodes, while the former will remain on the show into season 6 and get to have a role beyond that of Clarke’s occasional friend with benefit.

This turned out to be much longer than I wanted it to, but that’s because this episode juggles so many storylines and characters (and a bit of nice blatant fanservice, too – like the scene of Bellamy and Lincoln sparring shirtless, or a celebrity cameo).

But how about the one plot point that was completely ignored in this episode and the rest of season 3 (and 4, and 5, and we can assume will be ignored forever)? WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THE REAPERS?? Did they get cured, as the plan was originally? Abby was supposed to cure them when the alliance was still on. Did they get killed – and how, and by whom? Were they still roaming around in season 3 and 4? Why is there not a single word about any of that after season 2? Indra even recognized one of the Reapers in 2x15, it was obviously someone close to her, maybe a family member, maybe her husband/Gaia’s father? The show dropped that plot like a hot potato as soon as season 2 finished.

Body count: 

3 Ice Nation scouts killed during the confrontation (2 shot by Raven and Miller, one shot by Bellamy in the arm and then killed by Octavia)

Rating: 7/10

3x02 Wanheda, Part Two

This episode benefits from focusing on just a few storylines and characters and not featuring any of the poorer storylines.

Most of it is an exciting and intense action-adventure episode that revolves around Roan kidnapping Clarke ad trying to bring her to Lexa, as it turns out in the twist ending (after both Clarke and first time audience thought he was taking her to the Ice Nation Queen Nia), while a group from Arkadia including Bellamy, Kane and Monty are trying to rescue her.  

More new characters are introduced, including one with a huge role this season: our group (including Bellamy, Monty, Kane and Indra) has a surprise encounter with a group of survivors from the Farm Station, including Charles Pike and Monty’s mother Hannah. It was a weird meeting as it started as an ambush, before they recognized each other. Who did Pike’s group think they were ambushing and capturing? Some Grounders who stole clothes and weapons from dead Arkers? It doesn’t seem they were aware that there were any other survivors from the Ark, or else, they’d have tried to reunite with them. But it also can be seen as a sign that their terrible experiences on the ground and almost 4 months spent in the woods as guerrilla fighters have made them inclined to see enemies everywhere and mistake friends or allies for enemies.

We get the immediate “trouble ahead” warning moments when Pike calls his people “Grounder killers, all!” and they cheer, and our group looks uncomfortable because Indra is there, and then when Pike looks at Indra with animosity as soon as he hears she’s a Grounder and expresses distrust when hearing that they’re allies. But really, there’s nothing surprising about his attitude, at all, and I’ll never understand fans who are like “but why is Pike such a dick”? The show told you why, right from the start. Most of our protagonists had a similar attitude to Grounders in season 1 and early season 2, when their experiences with people on the ground consisted mostly of those people attacking them and trying to kill them. And Indra (just like many other Grounders) had the exact same attitude towards Sky people in early-to-mid season 2, as Pike has to Grounders now – when we first met her, she was constantly asking for all Sky people to be killed and trying to dissuade Lexa from an alliance, especially after Finn killed 18 unarmed people, mostly civilians, in a Grounder village. But these characters all got to have different kinds of interactions with each other and have character development since. Well, Pike and the rest of the Farm Station people have had only terrible experiences – being attacked by the people on the ground right after they landed, seeing over a hundred of their people killed in front of them, including 15 children, and they’ve spent all the time since fighting in the woods, with zero positive interactions with any Grounders. It’s really not surprising that they’re the ones with most extreme views.

Kane, however, tries to convince them that it’s all Ice Nation, they’re the bad ones, Trikru are their allies. When Pike asks for details about how that alliance happened, Bellamy gave him the shortest and nicest-sounding possible version: “We had a common enemy” – “What happened?” “We won”. Bellamy obviously doesn’t want to talk about any of it, since he’s tormented over Mount Weather even though he may not be showing it the way Clarke does. But we see that Monty later told Pike about everything that has happened, though we only see the end of that story, how they got out of Mount Weather. We can assume, however, that he did tell him all including Lexa’s betrayal, because Pike later references both that and Finn’s death in 3x08. Somehow I don’t think that hearing “well, Trikru tried to kill the kids in our camp, so we burned 300 of their warriors, then we made an alliance with them to fight the people from Mount Weather who were trying to kill us all, but they betrayed us and left us to die and we had to save ourselves on our own” helped change Pike’s opinion on the Grounders in general.

Having Zach McGowan on the show is always a good thing, and his screen presence helps make Roan an intriguing character. At this point he’s a mysterious kidnapper with a backstory about his banishment from Ice Nation which I really wanted to learn BUT THAT WE NEVER LEARNED (what the hell was up with that?) and (twist!) we learn in the last scene that he’s the Prince of Azgeda. Clarke and Roan had quite an interesting dynamic throughout the show – thank god for once that the show didn’t try to do an “Enemies to lovers” storyline (though I bet that’s just because the show already had two popular Clarke ships to juggle) but rather “Enemies to allies who are not exactly friends, definitely not romantic at all, who kind of bond and respect each other but are constantly trying to politically manipulate each other”.

Bellamy wanting to immediately run to save Clarke, the moment he saw that she had been kidnapped, and then dressing himself as an Azgeda warrior and going into enemy territory to rescue her, is a far cry from his behavior in 1x12 when he was able to be calm and rational about Clarke (and Finn and Monty) being kidnapped and presumed dead. It shows how much his feelings for her had become stronger since. In season 1, only the concern for his sister’s safety could make him have such a reaction. But he typically doesn’t make his best decision when he lets his emotions completely rule him and acts that impulsively, and in this case, his unsuccessful rescue attempt only made things worse, as it alerted Roan he was being followed, and made Clarke stop fighting and let Roan take her to his destination.

But it’s not just Bellamy who would “do anything for her, to protect her”, Clarke is equally determined to protect him at any cost, and we’ve seen evidence of that many times, including this time – when she begs Roan to spare Bellamy’s life and promises to do anything and stop fighting if he does. At the time, she believed Roan was taking her to Queen Nia to be executed, so she was basically ready to offer her life for his.

When I first saw that scene, I thought “Oh wow, show, you are really doing this? This must be the most romantically-coded scene in anything ever.” Before even starting to binge the show, I was always spoiled on the fact that Clarke and Bellamy are not a romantic couple to date and that people debate whether they’re just friends or not, and I always knew people shipped them, but that didn’t mean much since fans will ship anything (Broadchurch fans even ship the leads from that show, and they are genuinely nothing but platonic partners). So one of the bigger surprises of my initial binge was that the show is so blatant about this romantic subtext (which is more like text, a lot of the time), and has been since season 1, but they were relatively subtle with it at first and then more and more obvious as seasons went by. Maybe it jumps at you more when you’re binging it. In any case, this scene – the soft music, Bellamy touching Clarke’s hair, the way they look at each other after meeting for the first time after 3 months, Clarke begging for his life – it all looked like it was straight from some epic medieval-themed romance. I later heard people compare it to Tangled, but I’ve never seen that movie (it’s been a very long time since I’ve seen any Disney cartoons). But I’ve recently happened upon gifsets that compare that scene to a scene from Tangled: 

` Woah, they really did this. They modelled that scene after the scene where Rapunzel’s love interest tries to rescue her. And it’s not the last time they keep doing that and have used every goddamn romantic trope for the Bellamy/Clarke relationship. Is Jason Rothenberg for real? How do you do stuff like this, over and over, and then go in interviews: “Weeell, it’s Rorschah test, you can see this or you can see that, I mean maybe, but maybe they are just best buddies, ya know?” LMAO

Knowing about the Tangled reference suddenly makes me realize, they’re kind of doing this whole story as Rapunzel in reverse. We have our golden haired heroine who’s a target for her supposed special powers, and. Clarke finds herself as a literal Princess in the Tower at the end of this episode, and remains that for half of season 3. But while Rapunzel was trapped in the tower to begin with and wanted to escape and be free to see the world, Clarke was running away from the world, then got kidnapped and brought to the tower, and then decided to stay there.

 And what a freaking huge tower it is – I didn’t know the full significance of it (that it’s the former Polaris space station) when that reveal was the last moment of the episode. This thing must have been a great strategic asset, you’d have seen any army approaching from miles away.

I love the last scene, which is the first meeting Clarke and Lexa after season 2, because Clarke’s rage – spitting into Lexa’s face and yelling that she’s going to kill her, while she’s dragged away – is such a fitting and relatable reaction to the betrayal at Mount Weather, and, maybe even more, to the way Lexa starts talking to her without apologizing or even mentioning their history, being all business instead and talking about the current political situation and how Clarke can help her in that department. I didn’t even notice this before, but while Clarke just glares at Lexa at first and stays silent, it was when Lexa said “I need you” that Clarke spat in her face and went ballistic. It’s interesting to compare that to 3x05, when Bellamy had a bad reaction to Clarke telling him “I need you” in a similar context. It’s not the same thing, of course, because Clarke had not betrayed Bellamy (even if he may have kind of felt otherwise), but it’s a similar “I’ll just ignore our history – there’s nothing personal and painful to talk about here, la la la  – let’s instead just talk about how you can help me stop the war” approach.

I now love that scene even more because it’s the last time Clarke shows anger for the next two seasons. Or rather, she shows the same anger early on in the next episode in her conversation with Lexa and then when she was planning to kill her before changing her mind, but from that point on, there’s a shift in Clarke’s characterization that I’ve never liked. She was always smart, pragmatic, caring, vulnerable and good at using her words to convince people, but she also used to be vibrant, edgy, held grudges before finding a way to forgive people, and could be very impulsive. But in season 3, after the first couple of episodes, she kind of became a lot mellower and blander, and remained that way throughout season 3 and in season 4 (even though there’s otherwise a lot I like about her arc in season 4), where she would do ruthless things and feel sad about it and say “Sorry” a lot while other people told her she sucks, she would cry and look sad, but never ever show any anger herself. I really found myself wishing for her to finally show some anger at some point, at anyone, for any reasons, or go off and stop repressing her feelings and scream about her pain, break things, do something. I finally did get some of that – in 5x01 when she screamed at fate for taking everything away from her, and then, boy, did I get what I was wishing for in 5x09 – her slapping Bellamy and her silent but deadly rage/heartbreak at what she perceived as his betrayal, was the first time she had that kind of reaction to a person since her rage at Lexa in 3x02/3x03. (Unpopular opinion: I prefer season 5 Clarke to season 3 Clarke. Sure, season 5 Clarke was a total mess and reached rock bottom in many ways, but she was a more interesting and edgier mess. )

The B storylines were good, too. This is the first time we actually get to see what “the City of Light” looks like and learn about how it works. After Gideon, the big dude with a facial disfigurement, is killed by Emori in self-defense, we see him again in the “City of Light”, where he’s removed his disfigurement and can be a “normal” person rather than a “freak”. In later episodes, we see that Otan has done the same, but only Emori will not change herself physically, because she doesn’t have a problem with her body, just with the way others react to it, making her an outcast over it.

Nice to see Nyko again, one of my favorite minor characters. Unlike so many other people in this show, he’s always both nice and rational. When Abby, Jackson, Lincoln and Octavia took him to Mount Weather to find resources to cure him, and Lincoln was concerned because Grounders could have a problem with Arkers moving into Mount Weather because of their history with the place, Nyko pointed out “Places are not evil, people are.” The whole idea of the Arkers not being allowed to move into Mount Weather is stupid, knowing that the place had all those resources.

The show tried to give us bad vibes about Arkers moving into Mount Weather (which they absolutely had right to – they conquered it, so by the very rules of a warrior culture like the Grounder one, they could lay claim to it) with the talk from Octavia and Lincoln about how Grounders would have a problem with it because of bad memories. But that was just a red herring. Moving into Mount Weather turned out to be bad for a very different reason. We now know that at least the leaders of Ice Nation didn’t give a damn about their bad history with the Mountain Men, since they were working with Emerson.

What the heck was Abby thinking when she took Jasper to Mount Weather? She’s not a psychiatrist (did they even have psychiatrists on the Ark?) but I don’t think taking him back to the place of his greatest trauma is a good way to help his mental health. At least we get a nice scene for the Octavia/Jasper friendship, where she is comforting him while he remembers Maya, looking at her favorite painting, Second Circle of Hell by Dante. (The second circle of hell is for those guilty of lust... Is that why Jasper said it was ironic? Because he and Maya just kissed once and never got the chance to have sex?

Timeline: It seems that Parts One and Two lasted a little less than two days – Part One started during the day, Clarke spent a night with Niylah and immediately left in the morning, and Part Two took place during the following day.

Body count: 

Three Ice Nation warriors killed by Roan

A bounty hunter killed by Bellamy to save Niylah

Gideon, killed by Emori– but still “alive” in the City of Light

I don’t know if this counts for this episode, since it actually happened after the Farm Station landed on the ground, so somewhere around the season 1 finale and early season 2, but we only learn it now: about 120-130 people from the Farm station were killed since they landed (there are 63 Farm Station survivors, but Kane said the station initially had three times that number). A lot of them, including 15 children, were killed by the Ice Nation right after they landed, and Monty’s father, who saved four children, was killed when trying to save another one. I assume that some of the Farm Station people died fighting the Ice Nation in the woods, and that they also killed an unknown number of Azgeda people during that time. (Technically, this all happened during the timeline of season 2 and between the seasons.)

Rating: 8.5/10

[comicgeekscomicgeek]

Their Hero Academia, Chapters 5-8

Presented raw and unedited.   Edited versions will eventually be added to Ao3, where chapters 0-4 can be found here

Their Hero Academia – Chapter Five: Toshi Midoriya and the First Heroics Class

The next morning found Toshi rising early, as he usually did.  It was a habit he’d picked up from his dad years ago.  They’d go for a jog or another workout and then make it back home in time for breakfast.  He always looked forward to it and intended to keep up his exercise program while he was at U.A.  It was good for the mind and the body.

It was nearly seven by the time he returned to the dorms and most of the Class was already assembled in the common room, eating various combinations of breakfasts.  They were still in the process of developing a chore wheel for the dorms, which would end up including some light cooking. Sitting at one of the tables with Asuka and Izumi, Shinso gave him a sleepy wave, then beckoned Haimawari over to join them.   Good. That meant his efforts yesterday were being rewarded.  Not that he’d have expected anything less of his friends.

He returned the wave and headed to the small kitchen, where Takiyo Aoyama was preparing complicated looking omelet with the help of Akaya Koda.  He gave both of them a polite nod, while he searched the cupboard for his power bars.  “Smells good, guys,” he told them.

“Of course it does,” Aoyama said.  “I’m the one making it.”  

The blonde boy’s illumination was barely noticeable, but definitely growing as he spent more time in the light of both the lamps and the sunlight filtering in through the windows. Toshi understood that he kept his room totally blacked out while he slept, so that some of the light he absorbed throughout the day could bleed off.  By the end of the day, he’d be nearly too dazzling to look at, unless he burned off some of the power.  

He also understood that, like his adopted father, Aoyama’s Quirk was not entirely under his control, requiring multiple support items to use the light he absorbed for much more than glowing brightly.  Toshi couldn’t imagine what that was like.  Sure, he’d accidentally launched himself into the air when he was surprised, but to have that much trouble with a part of yourself…

Koda gave him a gentle nudge.  Despite her size (both the tallest and widest in the class), she was possessed of one of the gentlest demeanors of anyone Toshi had ever met.  “Arrogance ill becomes anyone, Aoyama,” she told him.  Her voice was especially incongruous with her build and size, soft, like the wind whispering through the grass.  “Especially after I convinced these peppers to grow, that they might season our meals.  Do not dishonor their sacrifice with your pride.”

The large girl had an… interesting perspective on things sometimes.  But to each their own.

The point seemed to be made with Aoyama, though, even if he didn’t seem to completely buy the idea of dishonoring the peppers’ sacrifice.  “As you say, Mademoiselle Koda,” he said, reluctantly.  “I...appreciate your help in these culinary matters.”

Not exactly a thank you, not exactly an admission of fault.   Of all the children of Class 1-A, Toshi knew Aoyama the least well. He hated to think badly of anyone, but he couldn’t exactly say he liked what he had seen.  Maybe he’d grow out of it?  Especially once they all really started working together?   Toshi could only hope.

Koda held Aoyama’s gaze for a moment, then decided that was probably the best she was going to get.  She helped him begin to plate the omelets.  “Would you care for any, Midoriya?” she asked.  There was clearly only enough for two, but he appreciated the gesture all the same, especially since Aoyama was making a rather unpleasant face behind her.

He shook his head, already biting off a piece of one of his power bars.  “I’m good,” he said.  “You two enjoy.”

Toshi  walked out of the kitchen, taking in the rest of the room.  The Iida twins were absent, probably at spending their pre-class hours in one of the workshops in the Support building.  Sero was busy filming Sato with his phone, no doubt streaming his friend’s eating of a cactus for all the internet to see.  Ojiro was pointing out something in a magazine to Shoji, who appeared to be doing his best to feign polite interest in whatever celebrity gossip the invisible girl was sharing and to Mineta, who was mostly drooling over the models on the cover.  Chihiro absently munched on a breakfast sandwich, lost in whatever music she had streaming through her phone.

That only left Katsumi unaccounted for and she was likely still up in her room, getting in her morning workout.  Where Toshi’s leaned more towards running, Katsumi’s involved more weight lifting and punching.   Probably nothing to be worried about.

His phone buzzed, letting him know he had a text.  

Dad: Hey, champ!  Ready for your first real Heroics Class today?

I sure hope so!  I can’t imagine what Grandpa Might has planned!

Dad: Just so long as he doesn’t have you fight Katsumi.  I don’t need to hear from Bakugo about that!

He wouldn’t really do that, would he?

Dad: Probably not on purpose.  But you know Grandpa Might!

Do I ever!   He keeps following me around!  They had to kick him out of the classroom four times yesterday!

Dad: I’ll talk to him.  And if that doesn’t work, we’ll get Grandma.

***

Their table of four looked like it was going to become a permanent table of five.  When they’d gone to the cafeteria, he’d made sure Haimawari knew he was welcome to join them.  It was good having someone else around who clearly had the same kind of appreciation for Heroes that he and Shota did.  Granted, it made more sense for someone like Haimawari to be into them, since he wasn’t from a heroic family.  Katsumi had frequently pointed out that being such fanboys when their families were already Heroes didn’t make that much sense. But neither of them cared.

“Anything interesting in Pro Hero news, Shinso?” Izumi asked.  Like Toshi, she had seen that their friend was practically vibrating with something to share.  Izumi was polite enough to offer him an avenue to let it out.

“Only the coolest!” Shota bubbled.  “Red Riot and Real Steel fought Diamondhead!”  He pulled out his phone, showing them video of the two Heroes fighting against a Villain who could turn his skin to diamond in a very similar way to how their Quirks worked.  As they watched, they saw the two Heroes land a punch against Diamonhead that caused a shockwave big enough to shatter all the nearby glass and knock loose objects over.

“The news report said you could feel the impact for miles away!” Shota added

“Oh, man,” Haimawari said, “that was one hell of a punch!”

“Yeah,” Shota said. “They’re both so manly!”

“Shinso,” Asuka began, “that was a lot of property damage…  Maybe we shouldn’t be cheering that.”

“But it looked so awesome!”

Toshi shook his head. “Red Riot and Real Steel are good at what they do.  They wouldn’t have done that if they had another choice.  Judging by his Quirk, I don’t think anything else would have knocked Diamondhead out.”

“Think Kirishima-Bakugo’s seen it yet?” Shota asked. “Bet she’d love to see her dad in action!  He’s all, like, “Pow!  Bam! Take that, evil doer, for my manly heart is pure!’”

Toshi had to laugh at that, catching Izumi politely chuckling and even Asuka trying to hide a laugh behind her hand.  “Okay, yeah, Uncle Eijiro does kind of talk like that.”

Haimawari frowned for a moment.  “Keep forgetting you guys are all pretty much family.  I can’t imagine what it must have been like growing up around that many heroes.”

“They’re just people,” he told him.  “If you’re only seeing them when they’re being Heroes, you’re not getting the full picture.  That’s part of who they are, sure.  Some more than others.  But that’s not all of who they are either.”

There were all kinds of things the public didn’t get to see.  Like the way Dad could cry at the drop of a hat or the way he still geeked out when he talked about working with other Pro Heroes (not that Toshi didn’t join him in the geeking out, mind you) or the way Mom obsessively checked their bank account or had their shopping cart total figured out to the penny before they got to the check out, even though financial insecurity was a thing she’d long put behind her.

“Trust me,” Asuka said, “my father’s “Darkness” speeches don’t work nearly as well when he’s telling you to pick up your room.”

Toshi knew from experience that Asuka’s mother could be far scarier with as single look of disappointment than her father could in full “warrior of the night” mode.

“What do your parents do, Haimawari?” Izumi asked.

Toshi could swear there’s the tiniest moment of hesitation before Haimawari answers, but he has to be imagining it.  

“Nothing as cool as yours,” he says.  “Dad owns a convenience store in Naruhata.  Mom’s a writer for a Pop!-Weekly.”

“The music magazine?” Toshi asked.  He’d seen Chihiro reading it from time to time.  When Haimawari nodded, he added, “That’s pretty cool!”

That got the skinny boy laughing a little.  “Guess it all depends on your perspective.  They’re just my parents to me.”

“Seriously though,” Toshi said.  “It is pretty cool.   You should tell Chihiro.  She’d big into music.”

“Sorry,” Haimawari replied, “still learning everybody’s names.  Chihiro is…?”

“The blonde girl with the ear-Quirk,” Izumi told him.  “Chihiro Kaminari.”

“Mineta’s friend,” Asuka elaborated.

“Ooooh,” Haimawari said.  “Her.   She’s got, ah, interesting taste in friends.”

“She’s not as bad as Mineta,” Toshi assured him.  “Try and talk to her.  Couldn’t hurt.”

“Yeah, maybe I will.”

***

For their Heroics Class, Mr. Aizawa and his grandfather had taken them to Training Ground Epsilon.  Unlike most of the Training Grounds, which were designed to replicate specific kinds of environments, Epsilon was essentially a long open field, with an observation bunker at one end.  It was a warm day, the sun shining, and the sky clear, though their gym uniforms were comfortable enough in it (apparently, the costume department was significantly behind this year).   Toshi was a little bit surprised that Mr. Aizawa could stand that much direct sunlight.

“Normally,” Grandpa Might said, “we’d start Heroics off with the Battle Trials, pitting Hero against Villain in a death-defying race for control of a bomb which might very well destroy the entire world!”

He waited a moment for a reaction from the class.  When no one other than Shinso (who cheered, of course) responded, he looked a little deflated, but he went on.  “Unfortunately, due to a… ah, Quirk misfire with Class 1-B, the Training Grounds for that is currently unavailable and undergoing repairs.   So we have prepared an alternative exercise.”

Okay, Toshi was definitely going to have to pay more attention the other Hero Classes.  If someone in 1-B had a Quirk powerful enough to do that kind of damage…!

Grandpa Might went on, “We’ll be splitting you into teams of four.  Your job will be to defend the Observation Bunker, where the rest of us will be.  Your job will be to defend the bunker from waves of robots that will be attacking!”

“However,” Mr. Aizawa said, “if even one robot makes it to the Bunker, then your team loses, no questions asked.  Because it means everyone inside is dead.”

Ojiro shot her hand up.   “Do we get to pick teams?”

“No.”

“As Heroes,” Grandpa Might explained, “you’ll often find yourself working with other Heroes you’ve never met before.  You’ll need to improvise working with a wide variety of Quirks on the fly.  This will help with that and help you get acquainted with your classmates’ Quirks!”

“And,” Aizawa added, “I don’t trust any of you to make good decisions about teams.  The teams will be as follows.   Team One: Midoriya, Aoyama, Sero, and Tensei Iida.  Team Two: Kirishima-Bakugo, Shinso, Ojiro, and Mineta. Team Three: Todoroki, Haimawari, Sato, and Sora Iida.   And Team Four: Tokoami, Koda, Shoji, and Kaminari.”

Okay, he could work with that…  Pretty good Quirk spread on his team.  Pretty good spread on all four teams, actually.  At least Aizawa and Grandpa Might were giving them a fighting chance.

“The hell?  You losers better not make me lose!”

…He honestly hadn’t expected anything else from Katsumi.

***

In general, Toshi thought he was pretty good with his Quirk.  He could lower his personal gravity until he could bounce off the walls. And with split second timing, he could increase it until he turned into a cannon ball and then bounce back away. He’d sparred with his dad and trained more than a lot of people his age probably had.  Being all second generation heroes, they definitely had some advantages going in, though they hadn’t all worked together much.  This would still be a real test.

He slowly adjusted his gravity, bringing himself back down to the ground.

“What did you see, Toshi?” Tensei asked.  While he could actually fly rather than float like Toshi, he was more like a rocket, needing to keep moving, which was not always as ideal for observation.

“Three one-pointers and two two-pointers,” he said.  “About 50 meters out, coming quick.”

Aoyama was glowing in the afternoon son, difficult to even look at directly.  Reflective wristbands likewise glittered in the sun. “Should go out after them?  Show them what we’re made of?”

“No,” Toshi said. “Our mission is to protect the Bunker. We need to stay close to it, but not let them get too close.  You and Sero need to hang back.  You’ve both got long range Quirks.”

“Aye, aye, Captain Midoriya!” Sero said, tossing off a little salute.

“Are you sure you and Iida don’t just want to grab all the glory for yourselves?” Aoyama sneered. “Keeping me on the bench while you get to be the heroes?”

“I don’t like your tone, Aoyama,” Tensei said.  “Toshi is no glory hog!”

“And perhaps I don’t like yours!”

Toshi’s bad feelings about Aoyama returned.  But now was not the place to get into it.  “Uh, maybe we should just…”

“They’re here!” Sero shouted, interrupting any further argument.

And indeed they were, three one-pointers rolling along on their treads, and a pair of floating two-pointers.  According to the further explanation Grandpa Might and Mr. Aizawa had provided, the waves would only get stronger.  They ten minutes.   Either they held the line that long, or one of the ‘bots got through and they lost.

He didn’t want to lose.  Especially not with his grandfather watching.  He didn’t want it to be this haphazard, he’d wanted some kind of plan. Dad had drilled into him how important having a plan was.  Now…

“Let’s get ‘em, guys!”

Toshi concentrated, bringing his gravity to near zero and took a jump, bouncing up like he had springs under his shoes.  It carried him up and over and then at the right moment he increased it three fold. He immediately fell like a stone, crashing into one of the one-pointers, smashing in its head.  Quickly, he switched back to low gravity again, bouncing off and landing on the sand.

Already, the blood was rushing in his head.   He couldn’t do that kind of rapid switching for too long, not without getting a killer headache.  Not to mention the effects of all that gravity on him.  He was tougher when he amped his gravity up, but it put its strains on him.

Around him, the others were tearing into the rest.  Tensei had flown through one of the other one pointers like a battering ram, propelled by his jet engines.  “As suspected!  They still have not fixed the structural flaw!  Quite disappointing, but good for our Team!”

Sero was quickly wrapping up the remaining one-pointer in his Acid Tape, this time making it as acidic as possible.  It was a good combination of his parents’ Quirks, really, the ability to create tape like his dad, but with all the different and variable properties of his mom’s acid.  “Die, evil robot, die!  Hey, with a dry, cool wit like that, I could be an action hero!”

And Aoyama… was staring down both two-pointers.  His glow intensified until it was blinding.  “Let’s see how these ruffians fair against my Dazzling Beam Blaster!”   Both of his arms snapped up and his wrist bands flared, each unleashing a powerful golden beam of light that punched holes right through the two-pointers. His overall glow was diminished after that, still lending him a bit of a sparkle and getting brighter by the moment, but it was clear he had spent a lot of energy.

He gave himself a small clap.  “That’s how you do it, boys.”

Okay, so Aoyama was powerful.  But that didn’t mean Toshi had to like working with him.

And then, just like that, a buzzer split the air, signaling failure.

“What? How?  We got all of them!” Sero said.

“Probably something you lot did,” Aoyama snapped.

“An unseen variable, perhaps?” Tensei mused.  “Some x factor I did not anticipate?”

“Uh, guys?” Toshi said, pointing behind them.  A one-pointer was already at the bunker, and others were moving in from the sides.

Mr. Aizawa’s voice came over the loudspeaker.  “Perhaps next time you’ll know to watch for all directions.  I expect all the rest of you to have learned something from their failure.”

“DO NOT WORRY, YOUNG GRANDSON!  FAILURE IS BUT THE FIRST STEP TOWARDS VICTORY!  I MEAN, AH, DO NOT WORRY, YOUNG HEROES!  YES, I WAS TALKING TO ALL OF YOU!”

…Maybe he’d be better off just floating away.  He could get a job as a parade balloon.  Anything sounded better than being here right now.

Their Hero Academia – Chapter 6: Isamu Haimawari and the First Big Mistake

He wasn’t hurting.  In fact, he felt like he was past the point of pain.  But he could hear people yelling, screaming.  Strange, he could swear he smelled something burning…

“Go!” he heard Aizawa yelling.  “Get them to Doc Clock!”

And it had been going so well…

***

Well, if the son of the Number One Hero could mess up on their very first real Heroics exercise, maybe Isamu didn’t have to feel so bad about how he was probably going to fail too. All four of the first team had had impressive powers, but they hadn’t been watching their backs.  Plus there was the whole thing where they’d been too busy arguing to pay attention to anything.  Still, he’d done his best to congratulate Midoriya on at least getting to smash one of them.  The green haired boy looked pretty down from his failure.  He would be too.

After the first group had returned, the second group had set out.  The absolutely terrifying Kirishima-Bakugo took the lead, with the other three following her.

She looked around. “Loud Kid,” she told Shinso, “you’re on lookout.  You two, you’re with me.  And for fuck’s sake, look around you!”

There wasn’t any arguing this time like there had been with Midoriya’s group.  Kirishima-Bakugo was simply too frightening for the rest. Ojiro looked the most like she was going to say something (Maybe.  You could only read so much body language on a floating gym uniform), but chose otherwise.

The robots were quickly upon them.   Kirishima-Bakugo raced out to meet the first one, letting out a scream of “DIE!” as she did so.  When she got close enough, she gave it an open-palmed slap on the two-pointer’s side and seconds later, a massive explosion rocked the robot, destroying it.

“That’s how you do it!” she screamed.

“Whoa!” Isamu yelled. He remembered how she’d made the spoons explode like firecrackers in the cafeteria yesterday, but he hadn’t know she could do anything like that.  

“Yeah,” Midoriya agreed. “her Quirk is pretty powerful.  She can release this liquid from her hands that does… something to whatever it touches and makes it explode.  The more she lets out, the bigger the boom.”

“…Remind me never to make her angry.”

“Trust me, Haimawari, when I say ‘good luck with that.’”

Kirishima-Bakugo had already destroyed another two-pointer, while the rest of her team were making short work of the rest.  Ojiro stopped in front of the one of the one-pointers and then simply… disappeared.

“Wait,” Isamu asked. “She can get more invisible?”

“Uh-huh,” Midoriya explained.  “What she’s really doing is bending light.  Her skin’s always doing it, but she can extend it to anything she’s touching, like her clothes.”

The one-pointer suddenly jerked and bucked, like something was trying to climb it, and then its head suddenly disappeared!  It stopped completely, staying still on the sand.  With the one-pointer distracted, Mineta gave it a powerful kick with one of her hooves, knocking it down.  The robot’s head reappeared as Ojiro returned to view, jumping off of it.  

“Oh, that’s good,” Midoriya said.  “She made its head invisible so its camera couldn’t detect anything!”

Mineta was doing a decent job of her own as well, even without team work.  She lowered her head, aiming her horns at one of the remaining one-pointers.  From the tip of teach horn, a stream of purple spheres fired forth, starting the size of a pea, but rapidly growing to the size of a baseball.   They stuck wherever they hit the robot, jamming its joints and obscuring its vision until it could neither move nor see, at which point she rammed it, knocking out its control panel.

“Hey!” she called out, “if I do well enough, do I get a kiss?”

“I thought I told you to stop hitting on me, horse-legs!”

“Sheesh!  You’ve really got no sense of humor!  Besides, maybe I was talking to Ojiro!”

“In your dreams, Mineta!”

The remaining one-pointer was demolished by a shrieking Kirishima-Bakugo, blowing its treads off with a pair of powerful explosions.  “More!  Bring ‘em on!” she yelled.  “Keep fighting, all of you!”

And the second wave was on them.   More two-pointers this time, but still a few one-pointers.  Like last time, some of these started coming in from the sides.

“From the left!” Shinso called out.   As one drew close, he took in a deep breath and then let out a long, low tone.  Isamu could see the air between him and the robot ripple and the ripple slammed into the robot, knocking it over as though it had been punched.  Shinso kept up the tone until the rippling wave punched a hole in the robot’s chest.

That was… that had definitely been a thing.  Isamu remembered how Shinso’d made the ground flow like a wave yesterday.

“What,” he asked, “what exactly is his Quirk?”

“Beats me,” Midoriya said. “They call it Vocal Harmonics.  He does a sustained pitch and stuff happens. Different things for different pitches. Nobody’s really figured out any logic behind it.  Trust me, they’ve tried.”

The others leapt into action too.  Kirishima-Bakugo exploding them, with Mineta and Ojiro slowing them down for her and Shinso.

It was in the fourth wave that things started to go south for them.  The one-pointers were gone, two-pointers making up the majority of the wave, along with a single giant three-pointer.

It started when the two-pointer had Ojiro down, one of its massive arms pinning her to the ground. Her clothes flickered in and out of visibility as she tried to squirm away, but to no avail.  “Argh!   No fair!”

“I’m coming, Ojiro!” Shinso called out.  He took in a breath again and started coughing.  All the explosions Kirishima-Bakugo had been setting off had stirred up a massive amount of smoke, smoke he sucked into his lungs.  Another two-pointer pinned him, face down on the ground.

Kirishima-Bakugo lashed out, heading for the three-pointer, causing explosions along every two-pointer between her and it.  Mineta fired off more sticky balls from her horns, but panic was throwing her air off, not to mention that the smoke was also interfering with her ability to aim.

Kirishima-Bakugo reached the three-pointer, sliding under its reach and tapping its arm.  But she was also clearly running out of whatever liquid she generated to make things explode, because the explosion she created was clearly much less powerful than she had expected.  She stared at her hands like they had betrayed her.

And then the failure buzzer sounded, as the three-pointer had reached the bunker.

“Well, you lasted longer than the first team,” Aizawa said, his voice ringing from the loudspeakers. “We’ll review everything tomorrow. For now, get back to the Bunker. We’ll let the smoke clear out before Team Three goes.”

“Good job, Team!” All Might said.  “Though you might want to learn to take it easy, Young Kirishima-Bakugo!  There’s a time for going all out and a time for caution!”

The robots released Shinso and Ojiro, the former of whom offered Kirishima-Bakugo a hand up, but she batted it away, getting up on her own and stomping towards the Bunker, her face set in a deep scowl.

Isamu finally remembered to close his jaw.  If his team lasted any time at all… it was going to get intense out there.  He was pretty sure his Quirk wasn’t going to be any good for smashing robots, but maybe he could be a distraction for some of the others?  Or get a couple of the robots to smash each other?

Midoriya gave him an encouraging grin.  “Hey, you’re up next!  You’re gonna do great, I know it.”

He returned the grin, maybe a little sheepishly.  “Maybe. Gotta try, anyway.”

Okay, deep breaths. He could do this.

***

When the smoke had cleared, Team Three was finally able to step outside the Bunker.   “So,” Isamu said, “how do we want to do this?”

They’d already seen the first two teams.  They definitely wouldn’t devolve into in-fighting like the first group, but hopefully they wouldn’t mess up the battlefield like the second either.  

“I’ll guard the rear,” Sato volunteered.  “My Quirk’s no good unless they get real close.”   Isamu remembered catching sight of him a few times during the Entrance Exam, tearing into a robot with his teeth.  It wasn’t something he was going to forget anytime soon.  

“Good,” Todoroki said. “Sora, Haimawari, you both have mobility-based Quirks.  Do you think you can control the left and right edges?”

“I’ll give it my best,” he assured her.  Hopefully that would be enough.

“Just leave the driving to me!” Iida said.

Todoroki nodded. “Then I will do my best to hold the middle.   Remember to support each other when you can, and try not to make too much of a mess.”   Her lips twitched slightly when she said the last part.  A smile, maybe?  Isamu didn’t know her well enough to know.

Really, Todoroki was quite the puzzle.  There was the strange power she seemed to have over the ginormously scary Kirishima-Bakugo.  And Torodoki herself was so reserved, quiet, but firm.  It was hard to know what to think of her.

And then the first wave of robots was upon them, the same mix as the other two times.  Two two-pointers, three one-pointers.  Iida went right, so he dropped to the ground and went left, his Quirk pushing him along like a bullet shot from a gun.   Maybe a little too fast, as he was coming up on the one-pointer faster than he expected.

He didn’t have nearly the power to go with his speed to ram his way through it like he’d seen Tensei Iida do in the first round… but maybe he had some skills they didn’t!  Instead of trying to dodge, he kept going and when he got close to the one-pointer jumped on the robot and kept going, sliding over it as easily as he had over the ground.  The nearest other one-pointer took a swing at him and he added an extra burst of speed, carrying him over the robot’s shoulder and down his back.  The second one-pointer’s blow hammered home on the first, smashing a hole in it and bring it down, giving him just enough time to hit the dirt and slide away.

He skidded to a stop. “I…  I did it!”  He’d managed it a couple times during the Entrance Exam, but he really hadn’t been sure he could do it again.

“Good job, Haimawari!” Todoroki cheered.  “But keep alert!’  

A two-pointer was nearly upon her, but she pointed a pale hand at it and frost began to appear along its surface, until its skin was frozen solid and it started to crack under its own weight.  Todoroki grimaced with the exertion of it, her pale features flushing.  She pointed at one of the one-pointers, this time unleashing a blast of flames that quickly took it down.  As she stopped the flames, her condition improved.

Weird, actually. Every time he’d seen her make ice, she made fire right after.  He didn’t know what that meant.

But he needed his head back in the game.  He saw Iida taking down the last one pointer, her jet engines giving her more than enough power to knock its head clean off.

“One more two-pointer,” he said.  “Heading towards Sato!”    The thick-lipped boy took up a defensive stance, but he wouldn’t last long against that.

Isamu threw himself forward and saw Iida keeping pace with him.  “There’s a design flaw,” she told him.  “Lots of them, actually.  But the leg joints are especially weak.  If we both hit it at the same time in a different leg, we should be able to take it down.”

“Got it!” he said, squinting against the dust their speed was kicking up.  He was definitely going to need goggles and a mask if he was going to keep doing this kind of thing.

He concentrated, pouring on the speed, kicking himself into a higher gear.  Iida kept pace, both of them racing to towards the robot.  Sato, to his credit, held his ground, bearing his teeth at the machine.  He and Iida reached the robot at the same time, both of them striking a leg joint. The joints buckled and the robot toppled over.  Sato pounced on it, opening his jaw wider than Isamu would have thought possible, taking a huge bite out of its head.  

“Blegh,” Sato said. “It’s stale!”

Yeah, he wasn’t going to ask any follow up question about that.

And there wasn’t any time. The next wave was already starting.

***

By the fourth wave, they were running out of steam.  Iida was down, having run out of fuel from overusing her Jetpack.  Sato was curled up on a ball, his belly bloated, moaning.

Todoroki looked dead on her feet, and even Isamu was exhausted.  This was the longest and hardest he’d ever pushed his Quirk continuously.  At least during the Entrance Exam, he’d had spurts where he could rest, catch his breath for a moment.

“You… okay?” he asked Todoroki, as the next wave came towards them.

“No,” she said.  “I do not think I can keep fighting much longer.” A hard, determined look set itself on her face.  “But I will go down fighting.”

She brought up both hands and Isamu could feel the temperature dropping.  A massive block of ice incased every last robot in the fourth wave, two and three-pointers both.

“Whoa,” he breathed.

Quickly, however, he noticed that Todoroki had gone even paler.  Her knees buckled and she began to fall.

He found himself moving before he could even think.  Even as he heard someone yelling, telling him no…

Too late, he remembered about the flames.  As he caught Todoroki before she could fall, her body erupted in flames and his world turned to pain.

***

He sprung up with a gasp, only to find he was no longer on the battlefield.  Instead, he seemed to be in… a hospital bed?  He had to be in the medical building. How was that possible? He’d taken a blast of fire that could melt steel to the face.  Isamu was pretty sure that he should be dead, or at the very least, severely burned. But his hands were unblemished and as he felt his face, he realized that was too.

“What?”

“You’re awake,” a voice said, as he heard the curtain around the bed part.  “Good.  You gave us all quite a fright when you were brought in.”

At the foot of the bed, he saw a woman in thirties, wearing a white doctor’s coat over a black and purple costume with a clock insignia on her chest.  She had blue-white hair down to her shoulders, but what was most noticeable was the horn growing from her head.  

“How…?” he began.

“Are you not dead?  Or at least not more severely injured?  That would be my doing.”

“I thought I heard someone say something about a… Doc Clock?  Is that you?”

The woman smiled.  “I never did like that name very much.  A friend of mine called me that when I was a student here and it stuck.  I am Doctor Eri Izumi.”

“Ah, nice to meet you, Doc. So do you have a healing Quirk or… Because I didn’t think there were any like that that were that strong.”

She shook her head. “Nothing like that. I can rewind living matter back in time.  It’s best if I have an idea of exactly how long.  But on the plus side, you’re now about twenty minutes younger than you used to be.”

Well, that was a new one.

“Are you feeling up to visitors?  A few of your friends are waiting on you.”

He nodded and she turned to a very elderly woman that he now noticed was napping in an electronic wheelchair at a nearby desk.  “Recovery Girl!”

The old woman’s eyes snapped open.  “Just resting my eyes!”

“Of course you were,” Doctor Izumi assured her.  “Do you think you could go get Haimawari’s friends?”

The old woman smiled. “Of course, dearie.  Just leave it to me!”  She threw the wheelchair into motion, nearly clipping a wall on her way.

Realization hit him. “Todoroki!  Is she okay?!”

Doctor Izumi nodded. “She’s fine, just resting like you. It was a brave thing you did.  Or as my father called it, “A damn fool heroic stunt.”  That’s practically high praise from him.  I’ve told him to have you take it easy for a few days though.  Rewinding can be stressful on the body.”

Wait.   What?  She couldn’t have been talking about All Might, so she had to mean…

He was going to file that under things he wasn’t going to think about.

“What do you mean I can’t see Izzy, you shriveled old crone!”

“Who’re you calling shriveled, you whipper-snapper!  Why, when I was your age, I knew how to talk to my elders!”

“That was my foot you just ran over, you senile old fool!”

“Young Kirishima-Bakugo…!”

“Katsumi, please…!”

Eventually, the noise died down and Recovery Girl brought Midoriya, Shinso, and Tokoyami, along with All Might.   The former Number One Hero, here to see him.  His heart was suddenly pounding in his chest.

“Young Haimawari!” All Might beamed.  “Quite the display of heroics out there!  Though I really would ask that you not do anything like that again!  This old heart of mine isn’t as good as it used to be.”

“Oh, really?” Doctor Izumi asked him.  “Did I not do a good enough job the first time?”

“What?  I, Eri!  You see…”

“Relax,” she told him. “I’m just teasing you.”

“Oh, of course…”

Doctor Izumi chuckled and shook her head.  “Just a few minutes, now, all of you.  Haimawari needs his rest.”

As his new friends gathered around his bed, Isamu thought he might actually be doing all right after all.

Their Hero Academia -- Chapter Seven: Izumi Todoroki and Trying to Make Amends

“Mama!  Daddy! Look!  Ice!  Ice!” She had been so happy the day her Quirk had come in, showing off her power to her parents by making ice cubes.

“Oh, wonderful, darling,” her mother had said.

“That’s good,” her father had said, smiling.  He smiled so rarely, always seemed so lost in thought, but he always smiled for her and her mother.

And then she had started feeling warm.  Too warm.  “Ow! Hot!  Hot!”  And little flames danced from her hand…

***

Under normal circumstances, Izumu would have been glad to see her parents.  But these were hardly normal circumstances.  Not when she was lying in a bed in U.A.’s medical building. Not after what had happened on the Training Ground. She had pushed herself too hard and had collapsed during training.  That too, would be cause for concern, but not as much as she was facing now.  If she’d had more endurance… maybe she wouldn’t have collapsed.  

Maybe she wouldn’t have injured Haimawari.  Her memory of the event was fuzzy, but she knew she had seen him racing towards her as she had collapsed.  He would have been at ground zero when she had ignited.

Mr. Aizawa had been direct, but not unkind, when he had told her what had happened.  She had badly injured the young man, burns over most of his body.  If it had not been for Doctor Izumi (He was injured by one Izumi, saved by another. The irony was not lost on her), he very likely would have died.  And only the doctor’s unique Quirk had saved him from a lifetime of permanent injuries.

He had told her, had not tried to tell her that she should not feel guilty.  Instead, he had told her to use that guilt to motivate herself, to make sure it never happened again.   She would.

She should never have tried to absorb that much heat at once.   Unlike her father, she couldn’t just lower the temperature to make ice. She absorbed the heat into herself. And that had to go somewhere, manifesting as flames.  She could hold it in for a little while, but the amount of heat she’d absorbed, coupled with having already reached the limits of her endurance during the training exercise, had overwhelmed her.  And when she had passed out, all of it had come racing out at once.  

“We’ll just bring you home for a few days,” her mother said, “so you can recuperate properly.  You’ll be feeling fine in no time.”

She hadn’t wanted her parents called in at all.  Students got hurt all the time during training at U.A.  It was to be expected.  They had a fine medical staff, even beyond Doctor Izumi.  And students pushing themselves too hard were nothing new either.  

But it had been a fight to even allow her parents to let her attend.  Her mother in particular had been extremely against it, worried over her health.  They had settled on a compromise, one suggested by her father.  She would be allowed to attend, but they were to be called if anything disastrous went wrong with her health.  And pushing herself to exhaustion definitely counted for that.

“I do not wish to return home,” she said, looking to her father for support.

“You collapsed, Izumi,” he said.  He looked over to her mother, then back to her.  “We need to look out for your health.  If you push yourself too hard…”

She could make her already fragile state even worse.   “But if I do not push myself,” she said, “I will not improve.  The only way to surpass my limitations is to push them.”

“We’re not asking you to drop out,” her mother said.  “Just to take a few days off from more intensive training.  You can keep up on your regular studies still.”

It sounded perfectly reasonable.  But she understood her parents, understood their caution and worry.  It would be a very short journey from coming home for a few days to staying longer to not returning to U.A. at all.  The arguments would be logical and well-reasoned.  And if she was forced to endure them, she could see her resistance wearing down.  

Which was why it could not be allowed to happen.

“Doctor Izumi already recommended the same to Mr. Aizawa,” Izumi said firmly.  “So I am already excused from active Heroics training for the next week.  Here or home changes nothing about it.  So I would prefer to stay here.”

In spite of the seriousness of the situation, her father let out a small laugh.  “Such a stubborn girl,” he said.

Her parents exchanged a glance and as one, both said to the other, “She gets that from you.”  This, in turn, prompted them both to laugh. Her father’s short and sharp, her mother’s longer, fuller.

“My health is always my concern,” Izumi went on.  “I am aware I cannot last as long, run as fast, or work as hard as some of the others. But I am where I want to be.  I want to be as good a hero as either of you. And I cannot do that if you treat me like a fragile flower.”

Her life had revolved around her health for as long as she could remember.  Long doctor visits, the best specialists an absurdly considerable fortune could buy, enough medications to fill a large truck.  Constant reminders that she just couldn’t keep up with her friends.  And even the bullying that Katsumi had protected her from.  But she truly was getting better.  Getting stronger.  Even months ago, she wouldn’t have been able to absorb that much heat fully rested, let alone exhausted.  That had to be proof of something.

She took in a breath.   “Please.”

Her mother looked like she was going to disagree, but finally managed a nod.  “All right,” she said.  “But I want you to have a visit with your regular doctor.  Doctor Izumi has my utmost respect, but her primary training is emergency medicine.”

“Probably as good a deal as you’re going to get, Izumi,” her father said.  

That was… better than she could have hoped.   She unclenched a hand she didn’t realize she’d been clenching.

“I can agree to that,” she said finally.  “Thank you.”

“Get back here, you hooligan!”

“Screw you, old woman!”

There was the sound of running in the hallway, until Katsumi appeared where the curtains parted, frantically looking behind her.  “Crazy old lady didn’t think I could jump over her, but I showed her.  Got halfway down the hall before she could even get turned around!”

She seemed to realize that it wasn’t just Izumi in the room and had the self-awareness to look slightly sheepish.

“Ah, hello, Mr. Todoroki. Mrs. Yaoyorozu.”

Her eyes widened, then narrowed with anger as she drew her own conclusions.  She dropped into a fighting stance.  “You’re not taking Izzy!  You can’t!  I’ll… I’ll fight you!  You’ll have to go through me first!”

She really didn’t mean to—Katsumi looked so serious—but Izumi actually burst out laughing.  Her parents just looked confused, looking back and forth between the two girls.

“Katsumi,” she said. “That was never an option under serious consideration.”  Not the whole truth, but it would prevent Katsumi from getting angrier.  “And we have reached a further agreement to allow me to stay.

“But thank you for your support.”

“Oh,” Katsumi said, deflating slightly.  “Well… good.”

A shriveled hand suddenly gripped Katsumi’s wrist.  “Got you!” Recovery Girl said.  “And I told you, no more visitors!”

The ancient Hero used her free hand to put her wheelchair into reverse, dragging Katsumi with her.

“Hey!  Let go of me, you crone!  You can’t do this!  I’ve got rights!”

When they were both gone, her parents both looked over to her, incredulous.  Izumi just shrugged.   “Katsumi is always watching out for me,” she explained.

There was another shared glance between the two of them, the meaning of which she did not fully grasp. In point of fact, her father’s expression was quite confused, while her mother seemed to be trying to communicate something she couldn’t even guess at.

“I see Bakugo and Kirishima’s daughter is the same as ever,” her father said.

“Your… friend is quite devoted,” her mother observed.

“She is,” Izumi agreed. “I am quite lucky.”

***

Once she was back at the dorms, Izumi sought out Asuka Tokoyami.  She could have gone to any of her closest circle of friends about this, but what she needed right now was the kind of bluntness only the bird-headed girl could provide.  Toshi would try to soften the blow and Shota would inevitably get derailed into telling her how awesome she’d been prior to that fateful moment.  So she needed someone who would tell her like it was. She just counted herself fortunate enough to have made her way back without having run into Haimawari.  That was another good reason to avoid Toshi or Shota as sources of advice.  They shared a floor with Haimawari.

She found Asuka in her room, the door open.  Her friend’s room was tastefully decorated, with bright, floral prints on the walls. Asuka was at her desk, where she was typing on a green computer, the monitor of which was shaped like a frog’s head. “Asuka?” she asked.  “May I come in?  I need to talk to you.”

Her friend stopped typing and looked to the doorway.  “Sure,” she said.  “Come on in.”

“Thank you,” Izumi said as she stepped inside.  Asuka gave a slight nod to the spare chair in the room and she took a seat.

“How’re you feeling?” Asuka asked.

“Well enough,” she replied. “I am on several restrictions as far as Heroics go for a time, and I must see my doctor, but I am being allowed to stay.  How is Haimawari?”

“Physically fine.  Doc Clock fixed him up.  We brought him back as soon as she cleared him to leave.  Toshi and Shota got him to bed.”

“And mentally?”

“Harder to say.  He was more concerned about how you were. But he did almost die.  Who knows how he’ll handle it when he gets time to process it.”

Not exactly what she had wanted to hear, but also exactly why she had come to Asuka in the first place. Bad enough that she had potentially damaged her own career, but if she had waylaid someone else’s as well…

“I would not know how to begin to apologize to him,” Izumi said.  “A simple “I’m sorry” does not seem sufficient for setting someone on fire.”

“Probably not,” Asuka agreed.  She placed a finger on her face, near her beak.  “But you should still try.  I’m sure he knows you didn’t mean to do it.”

“Would… would some kind of apology gift be appropriate?” Perhaps that was it?  Certainly, money was no object in that regard.  

Asuka shook her head. “Definitely not.  Don’t make it look like you’re trying to buy his forgiveness.”

There was a brief flash as Frog Shadow appeared, manifesting over Asuka’s shoulder.  “But if you’re throwing money around, we could use a new phone.”

“Really?” Asuka asked her familiar.

Frog-Shadow just shrugged. “Your phone’s boring.  No games!”

Green-feathers ruffled with irritation.  “I can’t take you anywhere.”

“You never go anywhere fun, anyway!”

Izumi got the feeling she was now intruding on something rather personal.  “I, ah, I shall leave you to your discussion, Asuka.  Thank you for your honesty.”

***

Izumi stepped into the hallway, closing the door behind her to give Asuka and Frog Shadow their privacy. She had known the bird-headed girl nearly all her life and considered her one of her closest friends, but she still could not even begin to understand the relationship between the girl and her Quirk.  Granted, there was much about most of her classmates and friends she did not understand.

Kaminari was outside her dorm room, sitting on the floor, occasionally looking down at a text book or scribbling something on a piece of paper.  She looked up.   “Get the advice you’re looking for?” she asked.

Izumi raised an eyebrow at that.  “How did you…?”

“I’m not that dumb, Todoroki.  I was there and I saw what happened to Haimawari.  And you’re probably one of the kindest people any of us knows.  So yeah, you’re probably worried about what to do next.  And everybody knows Tokoyami won’t sugarcoat anything.”

“I hurt him, Kaminari. I am not sure how you walk back from that.”

Kaminari shrugged, but it wasn’t a dismissive one, as far as Izumi could determine.  She brought up both of her Extension Cords, sparks dancing from the tips, then pressed the double-prongs of each together, setting off a spark that set her twitching for a moment, before she pulled them apart.

“You and me, we’re not that different,” Kaminari said.  “Your flames got out of hand, I can electrocute somebody or fry my own brain if I’m not paying attention.  See, I did that on purpose just now, but it doesn’t take much to set off a spark if I’m not careful.  All our Quirks can be dangerous if we’re not careful.  Yours, mine, even Shoji’s.”

Her right Cord pointed at Izumi.  “The real important thing is learning and not letting it happen again.  We all came here knowing it was going to be a rough road and we might get hurt.  Just gotta make sure it’s never the same way twice.”

Izumi nodded. “I…  Thank you, Kaminari.  I shall keep that in mind.”

The sound of hooves cut off any further discussion, as Mineta ran down the hall and into her room.   The door reopened for a moment and she stuck her head out.  “If anyone asked, I was here all night!”  The door closed again.

Yes, she was never going to completely understand all of her classmates.  But she especially was never going to understand Mineta.

***

It was not until the next morning that she was able to speak to Haimawari.  Though exhausted by the day, she had slept poorly, replaying the events of the previous day over and over in her mind, trying to figure out what she should have done differently and what she could say now.

She let him eat breakfast with Shota and Asuka, eating hers instead with the Iida twins.  They were too distracted with sketching something to bring up the events of yesterday.  It brought her a little respite, at least.

Finally, though, she had to approach Haimawari and the others.  “May I,” she began, finding her voice faltering.   He did not flinch from her, but seemed slightly uneasy in her presence.  That… that had to be something.  Something she could hold onto, build up from.  “May I speak to you, Haimawari, privately?”

“Come on, Shota,” Asuka said, rising. “I’ll help you with that homework problem before class.”

“What homework….” Shota began, until comprehension dawned on his face.  “Right.  Homework. Gotta go.  See you in class!”

It left the two of the alone.  Everyone else in the Common Room was busy enough.  Everyone had seen what had happened.  They would likely not be disturbed.  Even if Haimawari looked like he would rather be anywhere else.   “Ah… sure,” he said.  “We can talk.”

She took the seat opposite him and took a deep breath.  “I’m told you tried to save me yesterday.  Thank you.”

At this, he did smile. “Just doing what heroes do.  Felt like I was moving before I could think.”

Izumi nodded.  “I’m told many of us have had a moment like that.”

The silence hung before them like an uncomfortable cloud.  

“I hurt you,” she said when she could bear the silence no more.  “Badly.  You could have died because I pushed myself beyond my limits.  Because I was not strong enough to control or contain my Quirk.”

He looked down at the table and folded his hands in front of him.  “I definitely didn’t think I’d come that close to dying on my second day,” Haimawari said after a moment.  “But I’d do it again.  Even when I caught on fire, all I could think was “at least I went out doing the right thing.’”

“I am sorry,” Izumi said. “You should never have been put in that position.  Never should have had to face that.”

“Isn’t that why we’re all here?” he asked.  “Because we can’t help racing into danger?  You don’t have to apologize to me, Todoroki.”

“I must,” she said, now looking down herself.  She realized she was crying.  “If anything more sever had happened…  If Doctor Izumi had not been able to…   I do not know what I could have done.”

He reached across the table and took her hand.  “P—p—please,” he said.  “Don’t cry. I said you don’t have to apologize to me, and I meant it.  But if it means that much to you, I accept your apology.  And I forgive you.”

She looked up.  He was smiling and there was not a hint of malice or fear in his eyes.  “I was afraid you would hate me,” she said.  “Or fear that I might hurt you again.”

“Don’t really have it in me to hate people,” he said.  “Got plenty of room for friends, more than I’d like for fear, but no fear for my friends. I’ve got plenty of doubts all on my own. Like what I’ll do when my back’s to the wall.”

“I would guess you’ll probably rush in and try to do the right thing again.”

He laughed.  “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

“So,” she ventured. “We are… all right?  Things are “good” between us?”   Why did people have to be so complicated?

“We’re good, Todoroki,” he said.

“After everything,” she said, “I must insist that you call me Izumi.  It only seems right.”

“Only if you call me Isamu.”

“It is a deal.”

***

“See, Izumi?” her father said.  “You just have to make sure you let the fire out.  Careful where you put it though.”

“I know, Daddy!  I know!”

“Just keep it balanced,” her mother had told her.  “And you’ll do just fine.”

“We know you’ll make us proud.”

Their Hero Academia – Chapter Eight: Katsumi Kirishima-Bakugo and the Need To Woman Up

Katsumi’s fists pounded into the heavy bag hanging from her ceiling, letting her vent her anger and frustration.  At least, that was the theory.   As of right now, it didn’t seem to be doing her much good.  The events of the previous day kept playing over in her mind.

It had been one shit show after another.  First, her team had fallen in the fourth round.  She’d exhausted her reserves and run out of explosive power and the rest of her team had let her down to boot.  Some people might have said that lasting four rounds was good.  But not her.  She was aiming for the finish line.

And then Izzy…  She’d always known Izzy was powerful.  But she hadn’t realized just how powerful she was. That girl truly was silk hiding steel. Even if she’d pushed herself too far. But Katsumi did the same thing. She could hardly blame Izzy for that. Even if her heart had seized up in her chest when Izzy went down.

In some dumb way, she was grateful to the Newb.  If he hadn’t caught Izzy…   Dumb Newb had damn near gotten himself killed for it though.   Maybe she really could ease up on him.   A little.  She had a reputation to uphold.

But her thoughts lingered longest on what she’d said in front of Izzy’s parents.  She’d threatened to fight two Pro Heroes, one of them the Number Three Hero.  She’d threatened to fight them for Izzy, to keep them from taking her away.  Who knows what she would have done if that withered old crone hadn’t dragged her off?

Well, Dad probably would have laughed and encouraged her.  So that was something.  Papa on the other hand…

“You are a mess, girl,” she told herself, pausing to catch her breath.  “And you’ve got it bad.”

There was a series of knocks at her door.  Three short taps, one hard tap, a pause, then two more hard taps.  Go Beyond!  Plus…ULTRA!

Katsumi shook her head. “What do you want, Toshi?”

“Can I come in?”

“Before I answer that, do you have Loud Kid with you?  Because I cannot deal with him before I’ve had coffee.”

“Shota’s having breakfast with Asuka and Haimawari.”

“Then you can come in.”

Toshi slid the door open awkwardly, as he was carrying a pair of coffees and a pair of those Pro Hero branded power bars he liked so much.  “Thought you might like some breakfast,” he said, offering her one of each.

She eyed the coffee mug suspiciously.  “What kind of coffee is that?”

“It’s coffee-flavored coffee.  Black, no sugar.”   Toshi made what she was guessing he thought was an imitation of her scowl.  “Like my heart.”

She gave him a blank look. “Was that supposed to be me?”

His eyes went wide. “Ah… that depends on whether or not you liked it?”

Toshi could be annoying sometimes, but he did know how to make her laugh.  And whether she liked it or not, he was always looking out for her. For all of them.  Even if they didn’t want or need it.  She took the coffee mug and gave him an affectionate punch in the arm, nearly causing him to spill his own coffee.   “You’re all right, Toshi,” she said.  “Thanks.”

She accepted the offered power bar and took a bite out of it.   “So what’re you really doing here?”

“Why do you assume I have an ulterior motive?”

“Because you only bring me food and coffee when you wanna talk.”

“Well, you do get kind of hangry…”

She rolled her eyes. “Out with it, Toshi.”

“Just checking up on you,” he said.  “After everything that happened yesterday, I was worried about you.”

Her pride flared.  Who did he think she was?  Some kid who needed a babysitter?  She wasn’t somebody who needed looking out for, like Loud Kid.  “I’m a big girl,” she said.  

“I know that,” he said. “But yesterday… yesterday as rough.”

Sometimes, Toshi had a real talent for understatement.

“I mean, you and me, we know the risks.  Our parents are Pro Heroes.  We’ve seen them get hurt sometimes.  Sometimes badly.”

That was true.   Dad got hurt all the time, mostly minor scrapes, cuts, and bruises.  But she was still haunted sometimes by a memory from years ago, when Papa had been badly beaten by a Villain named Strongarm. She remembered seeing him broken and bandaged in that hospital bed, she remembered hanging onto Dad.  It was one of the only times she could remember seeing him cry…

“You don’t have to remind me,” she said.  “I know getting hurt’s a possibility.”

“You know you getting hurt is a possibility.”

She paused, coffee cup halfway to her mouth.  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I saw you, when we were watching Izumi’s group…”   He trailed off, as she began to glare at him.  “I didn’t mean to!  But you were getting kind of loud and everything! But, every time Izumi nearly got hit or had to dodge or when she collapsed…  I saw your face.”

“Probably the same kind of face you were making,” she snapped.  “It’s Izzy.  We all care about her.”

“Yeah, we do,” Toshi agreed. “And maybe I’m not a really great judge about this… but maybe you care about her as more than just a friend.”

She had him pressed up against the wall, one hand on his neck, before she knew what she was doing. Both coffee cups had clattered to the floor, spilling their contents on the carpet.  “The hell did you just say, Toshi?!”

His eyes were widening as he struggled against her grip.  “Can’t…  can’t… breathe…  Katsumi…”

With a growl, she let him go.   “I’m sorry,” he said.  “I shouldn’t have said…”

“Is it that obvious?” she asked.  Did the whole freaking school know?  How the hell was she supposed to make people quake in fear of her if everyone knew she was soft over somebody?  …Did Izzy know?

Toshi shook his head. “I don’t think so.  I mean, I haven’t talked to everybody about it, but Asuka noticed it even earlier than I did.  But I don’t think most of them know.  Shota definitely doesn’t.  And we’re not going to tell him.”

Okay, that all added up. And she could definitely cross Ojiro off the list of people who maybe knew.  If the invisible teen knew, the entire school would have known.   People in America would have known.  Theoretical evil twins from an alternate universe would have known.  No gossip was safe from invisible lips.

She jabbed a finger in Toshi’s direction.  “You tell no one about this.”

Toshi backed away from her finger, up against the wall.  “Is this… is this because you like girls?” he asked.  “Because we’re all okay with that.  Sero’s gay too, you know…”

“It’s not that, you idiot!”  She threw her hands up in frustration.  “First off, I like guys and I like girls!  And that’s still not the point!  It’s… it’s an Izzy thing.  I don’t know if she’d feel that way about me.  I don’t know what a girl like her would even want with a girl like me.”

Toshi held up his hands. “I don’t know what to tell you, Katsumi. I really don’t.  But I think you’re going to have to do something. You can’t just keep circling like that.”

He offered her a smile. “What I do know is you’re a pretty amazing person.  And you and Izumi have been friends a long time.  That’s not going to change, no matter what else happens.  And I’m your friend too.”

“…I really hate it when you make sense.”

The silence hung over the room for a moment.  “This isn’t the part where we hug, Toshi.   Get outta here.”

He laughed as he exited her room.  “Okay, Katsumi.  I’m… I’m rooting for you.”

***

When she stepped into the Common Room, Katsumi was a woman on a mission.  She was going to find Izzy and she was going to talk to her.  An actual talk, with words and everything. The kind of mushy, touch-feely talk Dad derided and tried to substitute grunts for and the kind that Papa was so good at.

Step One: locate Izzy.

Actually, Step One turned about to be: Dodge the Chaos.

“You take that back, Frenchie!” Mineta snapped at Aoyama.

“I just call them like I see them, Chéri.”the blonde snapped back.  “You prance around here, trying to seduce everything with a pulse.  You know what that makes you.”

“Okay, that’s it!”

“Bring it!”

What happened next… couldn’t exactly be called a fight.  Not with both of them just standing at arms’ length, flailing their arms and slapping them hands against each other.

And then some of the others started cheering them on.  Sero was recording the whole thing on his phone, Ojiro was cheering on Aoyama, Kaminari was cheering on Mineta, and the Iida Twins were yelling at everyone that fighting would not be tolerated…

Yep, she just sidestepped that whole thing, passing by Koda, who was watching the whole thing rather helplessly.

There.  Izzy was at one of the tables… with the Newb.

Great.  Just great.

Maybe she could try the whole “being nicer” thing?

Yep.  She was going to walk over there and ask to talk to Izzy. She wasn’t even going to threaten the Newb into moving.  She was going to put on her friendliest face, go over there, and talk to Izzy.

So why weren’t her legs working?

She was Katsumi Kirishima-Bakugo, the wo-manliest Hero-in-Training in the whole school, daughter of two of manliest and most awesome heroes on the planet.  She didn’t back down from anything.  Not from a fight, not from a challenge, and definitely not from a girl she’d had a crush on since she was eight.

One foot in front of the other.  She could do this.

So why… was the Newb… holding her hand?  And grinning like an idiot?  And Izzy was smiling too…

She ran.

***

Izzy was back in school finally, having been gone for a long time because she’d been so sick.  She’d ended up in the same class as Katsumi.

There’d been three of them.  She didn’t remember their names.  She just remembered what they’d done.  

She’d fallen on the playground, while they were running, playing tag.  She wasn’t as fast as anyone else, panting and out of breath.

“Why don’t you just stay down?” one girl had sneered, all three of her eyes cold and cruel.

“Nobody wants to play with a sick kid like you!” another had taunted, her spiked tail swinging behind her.

“Can’t believe somebody like her has Hero parents!” a third had said.  “They must be so embarrassed!”

“All of you, shut up! Leave her alone!”  She’d picked up a handful of rocks, letting her explosive power seep into them.  She wasn’t supposed to use her Quirk while at school or on the playground, but they just made her so mad…!   She threw the rocks, where they exploded at the mean girls’ feet, all bang and no flame, but more than enough to scare them off.

“Fine!” the three-eyed girl had snapped.  “You want her, you can have her!”

She offered Izzy a hand-up.  “It’s okay,” Katsumi had said.  “I’m here.

Slowly, Izzy’s sobs stopped.  “Thank you,” she’d said.  “I didn’t… I didn’t know they’d be so mean.”

“Don’t worry, Izzy,” she’d said.  “Anything happens, I’ll exploderize them!”

Izzy had pressed her hands to her face.  “I… I wouldn’t want anybody to get hurt…”

“Aaaw, maybe I can just exploderize them a little?”

“Maybe just a little, Katsumi.”

“Don’t worry,” she told Izzy again.  “I’ll take care of you.”

And Izzy was hugging her and she had never felt more like a Hero than she had right then.

***

Katsumi hadn’t gotten far, just under one of the trees in the courtyard.  She wasn’t going to cry.  She was not going to cry.  She was Katsumi Kirishima-Bakugo, and she definitely did not just go crying over anything.  

She was… she was happy for Izzy.  Yes. Izzy absolutely deserved all the happiness in the world.  She couldn’t be mad at her for finding happiness…

“ARGH!”  She let out a scream, releasing some of the rage she felt burning up inside her.  Katsumi was well aware that she had what some might call “anger issues.”  And sometimes, yeah, she let it out at the wrong times.  Usually when someone pissed her off or did something stupid.   But she had rarely been as angry as she was right now. Angry at the unfairness of it all, angry at missed chances, angry at herself for waiting so long.

She needed something to punch, something to explode.  But no targets presented themselves.  And she was smart enough not to just unleash random property damage.  She didn’t need the headache or the detention that would come with that.

Problems she could punch were so much easier to solve.

“Katsumi.”

She looked up and blinked rapidly, because she had to be dreaming.  It was Izzy.  But why would Izzy be out here?

“Katsumi,” Izzy repeated. “In all the time I have known you, I have never seen you run like that. What’s wrong?”

Words left her mouth before she had the chance to stop them.  “You came running after me?  You break up with your new boyfriend already?”

Confusion worked its way across Izzy’s face.  “My… what?”

She struggled to remember the Newb’s actual name.  “Haimawari. I saw the two of you.   I’m…  I’m happy for you.  Much as I hate to admit it… he seems like the Hero-type.  And you deserve the best, Izzy.”

“Katsumi,” Izzy said, still looking very confused, “Haimawari is my friend.  That is all. I don’t know what would lead you to believe otherwise.”

“I saw the two of you!  Smiling, holding hands…”

“Ah.”  Izumi nodded.  “We were just speaking to each other.  I apologized for setting him on fire.”

Only Izzy could have delivered a statement like that.

“He forgave me,” she went on.  “I was… grateful for that.  I was so ashamed of what I had done to him… I feared he might hate me.”

No one could hate Izzy, that much, Katsumi was certain of.

“So you don’t… like him, like that?” Katsumi prompted.  “You’re just friends?’

“Just friends,” Izzy assured her.

Relief washed over Katsumi like a wave, quieting some of the flames of rage within her.  Those flames were quickly replaced by icy, cold dread gripping its way around her heart.   Izzy might not have been involved with the Newb… but she still seemed blind to how she felt about her.

“I am sorry if I upset you somehow,” Izzy told her.  “I know… I am not always good at knowing how other people will react.  But I truly do not understand why it would upset you so.”

Katsumi looked away, the words dying in her throat for once, instead of escaping before she could consider them.  How could she tell Izzy how she felt?  What if she didn’t feel the same way?

“Katsumi.   Please.  Talk to me.”

It was now or never. Time to Woman Up.

“I’m in love with you, Izzy. Been in love with you for a long time.”

And then the dormitory exploded.

[starry19]

Long Nights and Brighter Days

AN: Just when you thought I had utterly abandoned the ship! This is entirely from the second deleted Lyatt scene our wonderful writers released (that was absolute catnip for me, sheeeeesh)…and I changed a few things. Like the ending.

Long Nights and Brighter Days

He had seen many men practically dead on their feet from exhaustion before, even members of Delta Force. When the mission was over, when the adrenaline left the system, all that was left was exhaustion and a haunting desire to lay down and never get up again.

Lucy had reached that point.

He could tell by her eyes, by the way she was hunched over into herself, by the way it looked as though she was going to fall over without warning.

Agent Christopher had sent her to bed, and then had held him back for a quiet discussion of what his assessment of Lucy was.

How badly she was damaged.

He honestly didn’t know.

Physically, she was sound. Mentally, emotionally…that would take much longer to figure out.

He’d paced around the bunker after Agent Christopher had dismissed him. It had been a hell of a day. Just twenty four hours before, he had been climbing the walls. Now…now they’d brought Lucy home, safe, if not entirely sound.

He was having a little difficulty with the adjustment.

At the moment, there was nothing to fight, nothing to work towards. No need for him to stare at the ceiling at night and torture himself with ideas about what could be happening to her, visions where she screamed his name, begging him to come save her.

But there were worse things than the physical.

Without quite deciding he was going to move, he found himself in the doorway to her room. She had a lamp burning, and he wondered if she was trying to avoid the darkness or if it was pure accident.

He hesitated, but she didn’t move. Was she asleep? It would be the best thing for her, along with actual food, but he knew she hadn’t eaten since her return.

As narrow as the bed was, it still looked too large for her. He had never seen her this delicate, this…broken, maybe. He felt his heart fracture, just a little, as he looked at her sleeping form. There was no color in her cheeks, not at all.

Carefully, he drew the covers up to her shoulders.

She was here, he reminded himself. Right there, right in front of him. He brushed a wayward strand of hair away from her face. Gave into an impulse and kissed her temple.

It’s okay, he promised silently. I’ve got you now.

He made to leave, but then her small fingers wrapped around his wrist.

He crouched down again, slightly embarrassed to have been caught.

“Hey,” he whispered, “I thought you were sleeping.”

Her expression didn’t change. “I want to be,” she said quietly. “I just can’t.”

He understood that as well. “Want me to go find a couple shots of bourbon?”

She gave him the ghost of a smile. “Do you think that’d work?”

He shrugged, shifting his weight. “Maybe. But I should probably tell you that I have no idea if we have bourbon in this hell hole or not.”

Lucy turned a little, the stark lighting accenting the edges of her cheekbones and the hollows below them. He was going to force feed her tomorrow if it came to that.

“Can I get you anything that isn’t liquor-related?” he murmured. Her fingers were still on his wrist.

Her face was very solemn, and her voice, when she spoke, was a little shaky. Afraid, even. “Maybe you?” she asked, so softly he had to strain to hear her.

His heart felt like it was in a vise. He hurt for her. But what he felt didn’t matter, not now.

He worked hard, managed a smile. “All yours,” he said.

“Wyatt,” she said, and he couldn’t help but remember the nights when his mind had betrayed him, had dared to think that maybe she was gone, that he would never be able to hear her voice again, “will you come here and hold me for just a little bit?”

Unexpectedly, tears sprang into his eyes. “Yes,” he said, trying to hide them from her. “Of course. For as long as you want.”

She moved over, and he slid into the bed beside her, arms going carefully around her as she burrowed into his chest. When they were settled, she sighed, deeply.

“I missed you,” he breathed into her hair.

She was very still. “I grieved for you.”

He wanted to cry. Instead, he tightened his arms. “I’m so sorry it took us so long. I’m sorry you had to go through six weeks of hell. If it was up to me, I would have kicked down every door in this damn state to try and find you.” He was not exaggerating.

He wasn’t sure if she was listening, however. “I’m not entirely convinced this isn’t a dream,” she went on. “Although I think my brain would have come up with something better than an army bunker.” Her fingers closed on a handful of t-shirt.

“You’re not dreaming,” he told her.

She looked up at him abruptly, dark eyes lost, haunted. “How can you be sure?”

Jesus. She was going to be the death of him. And he…he was going to be the death of all of these people who had done this to her.

“Lucy, sweetheart,” he whispered, the endearment slipping out without conscious thought, “I swear this is real. You’re safe, I’m not dead, Rufus isn’t dead, and your mind isn’t cruel enough to come up with an alternate reality where you have to share a bathroom with four other people.”

A strangled chuckle escaped her, and he felt very slightly better. He ran a hand down her back, alarmed that he could feel her ribs so distinctly.

She had a long way to go before she was her old self, if indeed such a thing was possible. Long experience told him it probably wasn’t, but he wanted more for her.

She curled closer to him, and he squeezed her as tight as he dared.

“Don’t let go,” she breathed.

He shook his head. “No,” he agreed.

The glare from the lamp was almost directly over his face. “Can I shut this thing off?” he asked, gesturing at it.

There was a second of hesitation, which told him a lot.

“Yeah,” she said, quietly. “Just…just as long as you’re in here, it’s fine.”

He reached up with one hand and flipped the switch. Felt her let out a shuddering breath.

“Tell me,” he murmured, one hand tracing down her back.

She was silent for so long that he had almost given up. “I know it’s stupid,” she finally said, “but I had this idea that if I turned the lights off, all of this would go away. That it would all disappear, and I’d wake up back…wherever I was. And you’d be gone again.”

He swallowed back what felt alarmingly like heartbreak. Kissed the top of her head. “What can I do to make this real for you?” he whispered.

She shook her head. “I have no idea,” she breathed back. “Give me time, maybe. I’m sure it’ll help a lot when the sun comes up and I get to use a World War II era shower.”

He appreciated the attempt at humor.

Lucy absently hooked her fingers into his his belt loops, reminding him that was he was fully dressed, shoes and all. It didn’t matter. He’d slept in much worse conditions, and for much worse reasons.

“Let’s try for another attempt at sleeping,” he gently suggested, tucking her further into his side. “I’ll be here when you fall asleep,” he promised, “and when you wake up.”

She dubiously agreed, and he wondered if either of them were going to sleep at all. Still, if she wanted to be held all night, by God, he was going to be there to hold her.

Lucy shifted a little, and he could have sworn she pressed a kiss over his heart, but perhaps that was just wishful thinking on his part.

He had no idea how long he laid there, Lucy’s insubstantial and precious weight against him, keeping track of her shallow breaths. Eventually, they became deeper, and he relaxed a little. She was actually asleep this time.

He didn’t move for the next three hours, eyes fluttering shut eventually, half-dozing, half keeping a quiet vigil over the woman he loved.

Toward morning, Lucy rolled to her other side, and he followed, his nose almost touching the back of her neck.  

An hour later, with dawn rising, she turned to face him, looking sleepy and vaguely surprised.

“You’re still here,” she whispered, one hand gently touching his face.

“I’m still here,” he agreed.

“Good,” she told him, then closed her eyes again.

He smiled. They would get through this. If he had to fight every day for the rest of his life, he’d bring her back.

But right now, in this moment, he could almost believe that the worst was behind them. Nothing ahead but brighter days.

Oh, how he wished.

[theprojectatedensgate]

"I didn't know you could talk" with a deputy who finally quits being mute :D and John

Warning: Swearing and mild Violence.

“I didn’t know you could talk.” 

Rook scoffed at John, shaking their head. He never even gave them a chance to speak until now, they had to interrupt him to get a word in. God did the man love the sound of his own voice but it paused when the Deputy spoke out, giving them a tinge of satisfaction at finally shutting him up. He was mid monologue, pacing around the bunker room in patiently, knife in hand, when Rook had cut him off

“Can you keep still? You’re making me dizzy with all that walking around.”

 Blue eyes contrasting against the low light, turning to face them perplexed. Rook couldn’t help but smirk at his confused expression, the man who had been so in control of everything now knocked off balance. Maybe they could’ve raised a voice sooner but they were so astounded by the whole scenario they just had to watch it all unfold, satiated at his reaction. They shifted against the ropes binding them to their seat, attempting to copy his nonchalant style, leaning their head back with cockiness. 

“Well, I could never get a word in edge ways, eventually I had to disrupt your speech. You know I would be able to pay more attention if you actually gave me time to reply.”

John narrowed his eyes at them, brows furrowing. He stalked over to them, pressing the tip of the knife into their chest. Rook held strong, meeting Johns intense gaze, not daring to show any sign of pain. He hummed at them, looking over their body, tensing his jaw. 

“You never said a word. Not once until now, I admit I thought there was a possibility you were mute. But now I know you’re just ignorant, now that I’ve heard your voice I will make you say “Yes”. You will confess all of your sins and you will scream for salvation.  I’m going to make such good use of your words, Deputy. You’ll cry for an expiation you never knew you needed.”

Rook couldn’t help but grin at him. Perhaps they shouldn’t, the blade so close to their Aortic Arch, one stab could mean the end. But it wasn’t the first time their life balanced on the edge of a blade and John had had plenty of chances to kill them but Joseph wanted them alive and John would never disobey his brother’s wishes. 

“I’m not doing anything for you John Seed. I won’t say shit.”  They sneered at him, causing John to slam a tatted hand around their throat, the letters of “Eden” lining up with their jugular. Sure he couldn’t kill them but why would he want to when got to torment them as much as he desired? And God did it feel good to hurt them, they were so infuriating. The way they denied atonement, the ignorance of the Father’s word, their resistance of the power of “Yes”. But now he finally heard them speak and they were using it bite back at him, he wondered if he would rather them they stay silent after all, but the discovery of their voice opened up many doors. What would they sound like? As he would ink their skin and tear at their flesh? He craved to hear it, he would make them if they refused him, he found himself wanting nothing more than to hear them cry.

“Oh you will. You will atone for your transgressions. At first it will be scary and it will be painful, you’ll struggle, you’ll beg and you’ll cry but I will drag you into the light, I will make you kneel before Eden’s Gate. And you will thank me for it all.”

Tears pricked at Rook’s eyes at the force of his fingers digging into their neck. He squeezed their windpipe, their face flushing red with the lack of Oxygen. Finally he released his grip and observed them as the coughed and spluttered at the rush of air. John smiled a self satisfied grin at their discomfort. The Deputy’s brain buzzed with near suffocation, adrenaline pooling into their gut. They wouldn’t let him get what he wanted so easily, they wouldn’t break without a fight. Regaining their composure (and confidence) they eyed him again, tensing against the metal of the chair.

“I won’t thank you for anything. The only thing I have to say to you is just two little words.” 

John cocked his head curiously, irritation glinting in his eyes, he said nothing as he anticipated their words.

“Fuck you.”

The words came out sweet against the vulgar syllables. Rage overwhelmed him. He turned to the work bench, launching the knife across the room, flipping it over with a mighty bang! Tool box tumbling with it. Rook jumped at the sound, failing to stifle the giggle that fell from them. John looked at them like they were crazy, like they were the crazy violent sadist. He braced his hands either side of Rook on both handles of the chair. They held their breath as he leered closed to them, faces near touching, scent filling their senses, The smell of blood and cologne mixing together in an metallic strong concoction. Blue orbs flickered over their face, examining every feature.

“You’re such an insolent, naive, little sinner. I’m going to make you cry far much more than that. Your true self will be laid bare for me to witness, I will deliver you to Edens Garden with my own hands. Whether you want it or not, it shall be done. This is the will of the Father.”

Rook hissed at him, baring their teeth in defiance. They would not go so willingly, they fought tooth and nail against the cult, they wouldn’t falter just because John sunk his claws into them. The Deputy remained silent, reverting back to their previous state of quietness. The lack of reaction to John’s threat made him venturesome, more desperate to cause suffering. Suffering brought you closer to God after all. However the youngest Seed was not a selfless man, he never did anything unless it benefited him in some way, his main ambition now was to drain them of their belligerence. Nobody lasted long John’s bunker, nobody lasted with his tools.

John let go of the chair, moving towards his now toppled tool box, picking it up and placing it on the table next to them. He whistled as he searched through his toys. He picked up a larger, serrated knife, making a small noise of approval, grinning as he looked it up and down. He slowly stalked back round to their seat, holding the handle up by his chest. Fear flooded through Rook’s body at the sight, eyes widening and goose flesh rising at the impending torture. Thoughts of lacerated skin and streaks of blood causing a nauseousness to churn in their stomach. John stopped in front of them, his knee’s now pressed against theirs. He looked down on them, savouring each suspenseful second with a look of blood lust and hunger. Rook couldn’t hide the rapid rise and fall of their chest, the fluttering of their eyes as they travelled along the teeth of the blade. John could barely contain himself, he fantasied about this moment ever since he saw them at the Church. He lowered the knife to press against their neck, red beading at the edge.

There was a faint knock at the door, causing John to snarl at being yet again interrupted. He swept away from Rook, towards the door yanking it open, knife still in his fist. The cultist on the other side flinched at John’s sudden appearance, yelping as the door swung open.

“What is it?! I’m in the middle of the Deputy’s confession!” he snapped, making the nervous man jump again at his voice. 

“The Father asked for you, he says it’s urgent.” The man stammered, glancing from John to the restrained Deputy, the knife and back to John again. He sighed, his weight shifting in irritation.

“Fine. Tell him I’m on my way.”

“Yes, brother John.”

John shut the door with such ferocity the frame of the room shook. He sighed again before turning to face Rook with a grimace.

“It looks like we’ll have to carry on our informative conversation later. Don’t think I’ll forget I heard you speak, I’ve been waiting for so long. Tonight we can catch up on all the things left unsaid, everything you’ve thought about, every secret no matter how petty, no matter how small, I will force out of you. I’ll see you soon Deputy, don’t you go anywhere.”

With that, John was grabbing his jacket and out the door. The Deputy’s voice was something he had longed for, now he had heard it he was being torn away. It wasn’t fair. He wanted to toy with his new play thing, to watch them squirm as he hurt them. It would have to wait, his brother demanded his presence and he would not be one to deny him. 

Rook watched after John, fixed on the door long after he walked out of it. After waiting until they were sure he wouldn’t return they shuffled in their seat managing to shove forward with a scrape. Eyeing the staircase, they started the gradual push towards the top. They had a plan now, they could escape his clutches and lay low in a different region. They knew what would happen next, once John found out they had left he would hunt them down, tearing up Hope County as he searched. 

John had heard them speak and he would kill to hear them again.

Thanks for requesting, this helped my writers block a lot. Enjoy!

[frejahertziswritingthistime]

Color

A/N: This was a request from an anon, and later expanded by the sweet @sherlockstolemyname – thank you both for being awesome and requesting/expanding! Prompt: Can you do a Dean x Reader Soulmate AU? Expanded prompt: What if it was the one, where the world is monotone (like all black/white etc.) and when you meet them, you see color. What if you wrote when they meet, and they see color, but one day you’re home at the bunker, and the world goes back to black and white?

I love this request, and I think it turned out really good – it’s probably not nearly as angsty, as some might have hoped, but I’m in looooooove with it, jus the way it is!

It is going to be a two-parter, because I thought it would be rushed if I just threw everything together in one one-shot, so it’ll be a miniseries. Hope you guys will stick with it!

Remember, I always say yes to requests, and feedback feeds the writer!

MASTERLIST

Genre: Soulmate!AU

Pairings: Dean x reader

Warnings: a lil’ angst, language, a lot of fluff

I was wandering around the streets of the small town, I had recently moved into, a smile on my lips and my clothes probably mismatched as shit, to anyone who could see color. I didn’t mind though, because when you don’t see color in the world, you simply decide that anything and everything is matching, and therefore, I was wearing a perfectly wonderful, well put-together outfit for this late spring day.

I meandered a little, looking around me as I walked, my heels clacking gently against the sidewalk. I didn’t think I’d ever live in a small town, much less in a house (albeit rented), considering my line of work. I never actually hunted for shit, because I was the biggest clutz, but I was sort of a hail Mary to all hunters in the US – they could call, I would research and help with anything IT, if they needed that. No payment necessary, as long as they stayed alive. I had talked at least once with every hunter, but the Winchesters were calling almost every day with new questions. Sometimes I wondered if they were lonely, since our conversations often lasted well over an hour.

I wish I could see the colors of flowers, I thought to myself, as I passed the flower shop on the main street. The whole soulmate-thing was a pain in the ass if I was being honest. I liked the idea in theory, but in reality? It sucked not knowing if the roses were red or lilies were white. Everything was in a gray-scale, at least until you met your soulmate. I didn’t believe I had one – sometimes it happens, I’ve been told, that you can go an entire lifetime, never meeting your one, true love. Of course, they were a lot of people on the earth, and not all of them located in the US, so my chances of having a soulmate in Sweden was just as big as it was a soulmate in the US.

As I turned a corner, I blanched; I had spotted something, I didn’t think I would ever see in this small town. A goddamn Wraith. Shit. I quickly backtracked, my heart in my chest, and pulled my phone out. The last number, that had called, shone brightly from my screen, and I pressed the redial-button, moving the phone to my ear.

“Dean.” His gruff voice came from the speakers. I shivered lightly – I might’ve never met the guy, but his voice was enough for me to want to marry him.  “Uhm, hey, it’s Y/N.” My voice was cracking in odd places and I sounded like a little schoolgirl talking to her crush. I could almost hear his smile.  “We’re not on a case right now, so are you just calling to… Talk?” He asked incredulously. I rolled my eyes.  “No. Uhm, I think that maybe I need you guys here. I just spotted a wraith in my town.” I could sense his attention peaking, listening intently to my voice.  “How do you know it’s a wraith?” He asked, as a sound of fingers snapping rang in the background. He must be calling Sam over.  “Uhm, I saw the reflection in a storefront window. Do… Can you guys get here, before my town starts to fall apart around me?” I asked. An engine was already rumbling in the background.  “Give me the address.” His voice simply stated.

 At 01.30, my phone rang again. The familiar number popped up on the screen, and I quickly answered. “Dean?” He groaned a little, probably in pain.  “We’re good. All fixed.” I released a breath, I had been holding.  “Thank you. So much.” I said, relief evident in my voice.  “Uhm… Okay, we might need a little help here. I may or may not have gotten nicked just a little, and I could use a little stitching.” He said, hissing slightly as he moved. I looked around my small house. It was a mess, I hadn’t cleaned after dinner, my everyday clothes were strewn across the floor, and even in gray-scale, it looked horrible. I looked down at myself. So did I – I was in my pajamas, and I had taken my makeup off earlier to make myself more comfortable.  “Y/N?” His voice brought me back to the conversation. Fuck it, if he needed stitches, so he could probably live with a little mess.  “Sure.” I gave him my address and hung up, scooping the piles of clothes up from the floor, dropping them into my bedroom, before trying to fix my kitchen and myself, so I looked like I actually had my life together; a feat, that definitely would require several years of practice, but a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do.

Fifteen minutes later, my doorbell rang, and I ran towards it. A tall man stood my doorway, his long hair hanging down to his shoulders, and a pained expression on his face. He was supporting another man, who was slumped against his brother’s body, clearly passed out. I ushered him in.

“Thank you, Y/N.” He said – I recognized the voice with no problem, even though it was strained, while he tried to keep Dean standing. Sam.  “Don’t worry about it. Put him here.” I pointed to my dining table as I ran to my bathroom to pick up the essentials for stitching a human being together. When I returned, I didn’t even look at Dean’s face – he was moaning in pain, and a dark spot was spreading way to quickly from his stomach, spotting his light shirt.

“This… You’re sure you don’t want to go to the hospital?” I mumbled to Sam – the blood was spreading fast, and way too fast for my liking, but Sam shook his head.  “It’s just the placement. If you just stitch him up, I’ll go..” He gestured to himself. I grimaced. I hadn’t even looked at him properly, when he stepped inside, but he was covered in goo and dark spots (blood, I guessed).  “Bathroom is at the end of the hall.” I simply said, before I went to Dean. I pulled his shirt up, and gasped a little; this was a big fucking wound. I furrowed my brows as I took it in. Cleaning is step one. I took the bottle of antiseptic and poured it over his wound – he groaned, and his abdominal muscles tensed in pain. I almost forgot what I was doing, because holy shit, he was ripped.

I worked over the wound for thirty minutes, before I took a step back to look at my handiwork. It wasn’t my best, but it had worked – he wasn’t bleeding anymore, and even in gray-scale, he looked way better, clean and stitched up.

“Are you all done, sweetheart?” His voice sounded, and I looked upwards. He still hadn’t lifted his head from the table, but my stomach surged with something unknown, as he talked. “All done. You’ll be just fine.” I said, crossing my arms over my chest. He moaned in pain, as he sat up to look at his stomach.  “Thank you. It looks way better than Sam’s work.” He said, and he looked up at me, catching my eyes with a smile.

The world exploded into vibrant color. I gasped loudly, and I almost fell backwards on my ass, as I was being pounded with colors and emotions, everything happening all at once. Dean’s eyes were wide and shocked as he took it in as well.

Everything seemed so bright and the colors sprang into my vision, every single thing being more beautiful than the next. My house walls were a soft beige color, and the table, he was on was a deep, rich wood. The rest didn’t matter – all that mattered was the beautiful man in front of me. He was wearing a white t-shirt, spotted with crimson red, and a red flannel on top, ripped a few places. A pair of dark jeans covered his legs, and I briefly wondered how much muscle was hiding under there, before I found his face again.

Light stubble covered his chin, a shade lighter than his dark-blonde hair, which was tousled and perfectly in place, even after a hunt. His nose was covered in light freckles, and his lips was a perfect color of pink. The most breathtaking part of him was his eyes. Green and vibrant, as a forest in the summer, and they were shining with shock and wonder, as he took me in as well. His eyes reminded me of summer and of home – it was as if I had come back to my childhood home, and he was careful and measured, so I wouldn’t be scared, but all I wanted was to feel him around me. He was an enigma, bursting from a kaleidoscope of color and life, his eyes being the center, that would keep me grounded to the earth, or I would disappear into the colorful void.  

This was my soulmate? I was floored by the realization. He was my soulmate. He pushed himself off the table and walked slowly towards me, his eyes bright with wonder – there were flecks of gold and brown intertwined with the vibrant green, I noticed – and his big, warm hand came up to rest on my cheek, his thumb rubbing gently against my soft skin. I was on fire – he had sparked something in me, as he had turned my world into color.

I leaned into his touch, and a soft smile fell on his lips, as his eyes roamed my face.

“Y/N. You’re beautiful.” He said gently, and I blushed. At least my pajamas matched somewhat, I dully noted. 

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