#im going to lose my mind in two weeks | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

crescentmoonrider · 1 year

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A viper-lizard's tales, chapter 199 "Slow work"

in which Azula doesn't understand the choices she has

read on ffn

read on ao3

#atla #the last airbender #azula #yumi writes #a viper lizard's tales #im kinda tired for some reason...#maybe its the weather ?#we did go from heatwave to Rain Cold #also almost 200 chapters whoa !!!#im going to lose my mind in two weeks #already did when i wrote this future chapter

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cryiling · 2 months

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anyways ive decided if deku doesn't get his ass over to bakugo's corpse in the next 2-3 episodes im gonna cave and just read the manga. bc im sorry but i do NOT care abt any of these other fights right now 😭

#mha #bnha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #mha spoilers #bnha spoilers #izuku midoriya #bakugou katsuki #bakudeku #bkdk #once again my posts abt the two of them will always actually be abt bkdk #also THE FACT THAT WE DONT EVEN GET AN EPISODE THIS WEEK???? SICK AND TWISTEDDDDDDDD #admittedly i do kinda rlly care abt the toga x uraraka fight. and im lowk hella curious abt the whole heteromorph fight that's gonna go dow #HOWEVER. i srsly do not gaf abt any of that when bakugo and deku are RIGHT THEREE #also i have officially lost my patience with the endeavor vs afo and shoto vs dabi fights. oh my godddddddd #afo pls go kys. and dabi im sorry but i actually don't care abt u anymore #i was a HUGE todoroki fam drama enthusiast back in 2020 but now... pls im so done with it 🥱#also we JUST burnt dabi to a crisp and finished that battle WDYMMM he's back and the villains are now WINNING???? WRAP IT UPPPPPP OH MY GOD #anyways. all that's to say im gonna lose my mind #in the wise words of user makeste:#if their names do not start with baku or deku then idgaf what's going on #thank u for coming to my ted talk gn ✌️

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alluralater · 4 months

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hey everyone, i won’t be as active for a while. got home last night super late after being on the road for 20 some odd hours. dealing with some family things and as an older sister, my priority of taking care of my siblings comes first before anything else. being on here is amazing for me but i don’t think i’ll have much time for it. reminder to please treat those in your life who are battling addiction with patience and care. i lost my older brother (sweetest person i’ve ever known and he remained that way up until his last night) to suicide and alcoholism, trauma and ptsd, depression and his feelings of hopelessness. talk with the people you care about. another of my siblings is dealing with the same and i refuse to let it escalate to such a terrifying end twice in less than a fucking year. remind the people you care about that there are beautiful things to live for. show them kindness and love. there is all kinds of misinformation out there but know this, you can make a difference for someone. don’t let them suffer in silence.

#if you have me on snap then you saw the super gorgeous views and such on my way to idaho but what you did not see was me picking #up my little sister. propping her body up with pillows in a hotel room to make sure she didn’t aspirate on her own vomit in her sleep.#pouring out her water bottle of white claw and talking to her about drug use.#i never make her feel as though she has disappointed me or that she should feel ashamed. shame helps nothing. love helps everything.#i’m going to get her back into treatment soon- i just need her to know she has a home when she’s out. detoxing here first and being #positively reinforced for every single step of the process is so fucking important. it was terrifying to learn that if i had not gone to ge #her when i did that she probably would have died there in the next few weeks.#my fear of death for her is not what guides me though and there’s a huge difference between that and doing something out of love. being #there in dire moments is important yes- but being there through the mundanity of recovery is JUST as vital. it’s a process and it’s hard.#she’s moving in with me for awhile so i can help her through this sensitive time in her recovery.#she’s trying so hard and being recognized for that has literally been making her sob. knowing she has people who truly care for her is #everything. now that my stepdad is away from her like across the country i can actually finally help her. she’s starting to understand and #without me saying anything- she is starting to see what he’s done to her and our family. she needs love and support and stability. she need #reasons to live. sorry im kinda rambling a lot in these tags but i just… i can’t lose another one. the love i carry for my siblings is #unlike any other. i’ve treated them like my children since i was a child and those are my own issues but our mother is gone now too so it i #up to me.#losing my brother last september and my mom the year before that- grief has just been back to back.#in the hotel room i couldn’t sleep. she fell asleep so quickly and all i could do was watch her and think about all of the things i want to #do to make her feel like her life has value and worth enough to stay here and not go. my little sister is forever four years old in my mind #yes she’s an adult of 23 but she is a baby to me. she’s so young and she has so much ahead of her. she deserves a happy and fulfilled life.#our lives have been… very hard. 4 out of 5 of us are still standing and i plan on keeping it that way.#this is not the pain olympics or whatever but listen- if i put an adult in any of the situations we were in as children they would not #survive. we only did because there was no other choice. now there are escapes and we are old enough to try them all- every single one of us #has searched for some escape. it spirals and escalates and it doesn’t help but it is an escape. giving her love and affection and getting #her the help she needs and doing it the RIGHT way- it lessens the need for escape. there is nothing wrong with being an addict.#addiction ends one of two ways. life or death. unfortunately there is no in between. she’s going to feel everything- bad and good. i want #her to know there is so much good. that she is good. every move i make right now matters so i don’t think i’ll have time for tumblr or #much socializing.#just a heads up yk. thank you for your patience in advance <3

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cometrose · 1 year

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zhongli thoughts im bored

i am obsessed with the imagery of him holding a golden fan just below his eyes and gazing over the city

highly proficient in all makeup, cosmetics and accessories, you need to dress up nicely for a fancy occasion he can have you looking like a goddess just give him some time

he sits in the sun a lot, when he had the exuvia he would sit on the tallest mountains and sleep in the sun

Unlike the other archons zhongli is closely attached to the sun, he is like the sun in many ways, he guides people, brightens their lives, plants and life thrive under his care

However the sun is still deadly, those who get too close to him burn up in his presence and those who keep their distance are trapped in the shadow he casts and lose themselves, like the sun in the sky he is meant to shine brightly all by himself

i am obsessed with the imagery of zhongli sitting in a bathtub and all of his draconic features just come out one by one, first his arms turn gold and then come his claws. Next comes the horns on the top of his head as his hair grows longer and longer. Last is the tail which flops over the edge of the tub

He can't sing but he has some talent with instruments, a habit he picked up from being around quizhong, ping and venti for so long, he can work with string instruments best

He will pat your head, he can't help it, if hu tao has her hat off and she makes him smile that hand will be on her head

crazy thought of the liyue gang playing hide and seek, like xiangling, xingqiu, yunjin, xinyan, hutao and chongyun playing this huge game and they run all over the city it becomes a huge affair at one point xiangling is "it" and she can't find anyone but she comes across zhongli sitting in his favorite spot at third round knockout and she's like "sorry to disturb you but have you seen hu tao" and he smiles and is like "well i don't know about the director but i saw a blue haired exorcist up at the terrace he might be around the glaze lilies" and xiangling thanks him and goes to chase chongyun down, zhongli whispers behind him "she's gone" and then 4 of them, xingqiu, yunjin, xinyan and hutao just poke out from behind him (they want to keep hiding behind him but with a smile he shoos them away to play the game properly)

zhongli is painfully popular you can take the man out of the archon but you can't take the archon out of the man

zhongli likes to keep the moon by his side specifically the people who are like the moon; guizhong, venti, xiao, azhdaha, rukkha, ganyu the list goes on and on -perhaps they are naturally drawn together its unclear who gravitates to who but even liyue itself is a beautiful moon he can cling to

zhongli can petrify things with his hands, just lightly brushing his fingertips over anything will encase it in stone and with a short breath it will crumble to dust

mr. workaholic the reason why we never see him at work and always on vacation is because he goes crazy and completes all the paperwork and it scares hutao so she kicks him out (but then he spends all his money so he has to come back the cycle never ends)

as a consultant zhongli takes on many jobs if they hire him from wangsheng he’s quite expensive though ganyu tries her best to direct the qixing away from him but some things are unavoidable and they require his assistance

#zhongli #genshin impact #zhongli headcanons #the liyue hide and seek has been in my mind for like two weeks lol #since he was alive at the time i like to believe he knew one of the moon sisters #maybe that is where this moon affection originated!#give me 3 minutes there is too much sun and moon symbology going on listen listen listen why is zhongli the only one associated with the su #why is everyone close to him associated with the moon even liyue is named after the moon listen listen i think its neat i think its great #hes like batman the moons are his robins and he keeps losing them like they just die and shit #we have lost quite a few moons mister zhongli like i'll knock on wood but i have this terrible feeling you will outlive the other moons too #there are so many moon characters just people whose symbols and themes are all connected to the moon #i have seen the theories to some extent but i can't discuss it #i can only be so delusional #sometimes i wonder if im talking to myself #i mean like that’s okay the void can be welcoming i suppose

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widevibratobitch · 5 months

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omw to play emotional support for my mom disguised as ✨fun family bonding time✨ for the rest of the week <3333 there's something so deeply wrong with me uwu teehee

#and i still havent texted my friend back even tho she texted me a week ago and i told her ill text her back this week when i have the time #and i DO have the time. im just fucked in the head and the prospect of having a conversation with another person where i again #have to pretend im not at the very brink of a serious mental and emotional breakdown. is making me lose my fucking mind #ik she's having a bad time rn and she needs the reassurance and jesus fucking christ i tried i had two long conversations with her #that were allllll about her. only her. not a single word about me. that's fine. this is what people need in such moments right #to just get patted on the head and hugged and told their suffering is real and what happened to them is unfair and just made to feel #that for a moment they're the centre of attention and it is all about them. this is normal. this is why therapy exists.#so i try to give this to her but it is fucking draining. and i NEVER get the same treatment back. like she caught me crying at uni last week #and like yes she'll say some nice things but she'll always find a way to turn the conversation back on the topic of ✨her✨#like we started talking about my therapy and i finally got to actually say a word or two about what im dealing with. but then she goes #'yeah im just trying to figure out what's wrong with me when i listen to you haha like i could never cut myself cause it looks ugly.#ofc it doesnt look ugly on you haha but i could never lol'#like thanks haha good to know ill just shut up then and steer the conversation back onto you why dont i. i mean its not like #i spent over an hour a few days back sitting with you and listening to your talk about your childhood and validating you and not saying #a word a single fucking word about myself even tho i was also going through it myself but who cares right. and now im the bad guy again #because im not texting back.#i feel like im finally fucking snapping cause at this point im properly fucking angry. IM having a bad time too. IM going through it too.#I have bad coping skills and had a fucked up childhood and traumas in my life TOO and im allowed to just not be able to handle it #i really wanna break something lol maybe therapy's working after all lmao #oh also this is why i dont eat breakfast. i do it once and then feel guilty and suicidal lol normal behaviour #pojebie mnie zaraz przysięgam na boga mam dość kurwa BASTA

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anawrites3 · 8 months

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Maybe I'll be able to finish that jaydick mommy kink story today hmmm

#i havent written in so long #im actually gonna go insane #im so busy rn you have no idea #(im being dramatic cuz its been like two weeks at most but im slowly losing my mind because of ittttt

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dandyshucks · 8 months

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everyone pray for me that i did not just give myself food poisoning (;･∀･)

#i may have made a bad decision with the meat i cooked shdjdkl BUT I THINK IT'LL BE FINE #it was past the date on the packaging but it didnt smell or look or feel off at all so . i decided to risk it #and now im panicking bc i think perhaps that was actually rly stupid fhdkdl #but it was. so much money. i had no idea the date was so soon on the package when i got it from mum #I would've frozen it if I'd known dhdksl i should've looked #alas !!! i think it'll be fine tbh bc it genuinely did not seem spoiled at all so ... now we just pray #i had a fairly small serving of it and I'll see how i feel to figure out if the rest of it is safe to eat or not #im just fhdjdkl crying a little rn bc the past two days have been so awful and im so tired #i rly dont want to get sick on top of everything else going on #i would like one thing to go well fjdkdl just like. one thing. this feels like divine punishment for having the old lady group go so well #im just kind of losing my mind rn i think actually fhfkdl i have a therapy/counseling appt on monday though so we'll see if that helps #i do not have high hopes fjfkdl #MANNNN. can the universe give me a break PLEASE. I've been trying so hard the past three weeks to do well 😭😭#im putting in so much work and effort fhdksl can i PLEASE have this one thing go okay djdksl i do not want to get sick !!!#if i do get sick then im just. hhhhh. idk djdkdl it's just one more thing to add to my pile of Bad ig djdkdl what can ya do djdkdl #i am going to pull myself together and stop crying and go play stardew maybe idk fjdkdl i feel like im starting to crack a little bit #augh. augh. i would love to catch a break djdkdl #dandy.cmd #vent //

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crescentfool · 9 months

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doing things outside of your usual is such a humbling experience...

#lizzy speaks #to those who are curious what prompted this: my friend and i are collaborating on a video essay together #we picked it back up a week and a half ago after it laid in limbo for a month or two #and we're currently in the phase of editing it together (scripting + recording the VO is done)#and MAN. my respect for people who work on scripted/informative content just shot up through the ROOF #most of my experience with editing comes from footage first and then edit down approach (rather than creating/gathering visuals to uplift-#a written script) and it's. well. they engage with very different skillsets i think #my friend who i am collaborating with is very amused at me because this is not her first rodeo. meanwhile me as a first-timer.#i am telling her about how i am losing my mind over my editing timeline having gaps of footage because i couldn't think of anything to put #for certain portions (or i just didnt feel like looking through preexisting footage on the internet and dl-ing it)#and she compared it to 'telling a kid whos going thru puberty that its normal' EKLHFGLHH #im ngl the way i have spent like maybe 10 hours today off and on looking up footage and fact checking the splat artbook is so. explodes #it makes sifting through an 11 hour batch of footage of me playing big run sound like a cakewalk in comparison LMAOO #anyway if you read this far thank you :D i hope that in 2024 i can continue to be humbled in trying new things #and i highly encourage others 2 do so too! try a new method of approaching something or do smthn slightly adjacent to what you do!#tis a good learning experience and also makes u very appreciative of the things that are out there methinks #im literally only editing an 11 minute segment or so idfk how people make those 1+ hr video essays LIKE HELLO??? ESP IF ITS LICENSED MEDIA #HOW DO U GET ALL THE FOOTAGE FOR THAT. U MUST BE REALLY HYPERFIXATED AND DEDICATED TO THAT. DAMN. anyway. have a good 2023 everyone!

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vcrnons · 1 year

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these men. THESE. MEN.

#mingyu #wonwoo #im so serious dk needs to think about my mental health #because how are you going to drop THIS. drop THESE TWO FINE ASS MFS AND THEN LEAVE #my psychological well-being #is in TATTERS.#look at how soft Mingyu’s eyes are #LOOK AT WONWOOS FUCKING SMILE #AND TELL ME. TELL ME THAT IM SUPPOSED TO BE NORMAL #I feel sick. my stomach actually hurts #i am losing my damn MIND #wonwoo was in my bro-zone for months but i cannot look at him rn without feeling some type of way what is going on🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠#he has broken free the past few weeks. im fine about it. im absolutely not suddenly feral for this man. I AM FINE.#deep exhale #im going back to bed

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interpolationz · 7 months

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any billionaires want to come out of the wood works and pay my tuition? you can feel less bad about probably exploiting people and i'll even draw you some cool little pictures :)

#i continue to be losing my mind #i feel like a haven't drawn in like two weeks #augh #i just wanna be able to go to school :(#parents keep telling me i should just go to community college or at least look at state schools but im grumpy and stubborn

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otogariado · 1 year

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How do you get the motivation to start new shows and not stop a few episodes in? There are so many shows i want to watch (bcs included thanks to your blogging) but even when i have nothing else to do, it just winds up feeling like a chore

it depends on the show really! you have no idea how many shows i've forgotten to watch and/or dropped in the middle of watching them bc my brain doesn't wanna. (answer: most of them.)

in the case of PoI i started watching it mostly bc of my friend christy and bc michael emerson is in it. but it also has an intriguing premise. if you look at the past shows i've completed since last year only like 2 or 3 of them don't have some sort of intriguing mystery/thriller element. i'm mostly curious abt where the show's gonna be headed since the premise itself leaves you open to explore a lot of like themes and topics.

#i also started watching tfprime but i'm only a few episodes in despite starting it weeks ago. i keep forgetting to continue it too #zom100 i started bc i couldn't sleep lmfao #starting brba actually felt like a chore for me too to be honest. but im glad i kept watching it bc its a good show #i dont like it as much as i do bcs though. i think bcs really hit all the boxes for me in terms of what kind of show i would be crazy over #it also helps to be in a state of distress bc i need a show or two to keep going or else ill go lose my fucking mind #(but dont actually go looking to be in a state of distress)#ill also mention fiona & cake bc that one i started watching just now bc adventure time was a HUGE part of my childhood to teen years #ive been with it since day 1 and never got off the ride #oh if youre talking about arcane... i finished it a while ago i just had a caitlyn moment #op #asks #anon

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princelink · 1 year

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#i got a new job finally but they're super weird about scheduling and its driving me up a wall #im apparently basically on call which i didnt realize would be the case when i applied #and so far they haven't called me and i only worked two days this week #its been 4 days off so far and they haven't called yet for tomorrow thats 5 days off in a row if they dont #what the fuck am i supposed to do about rent :)))))))#im too neurodivergent for this shit i need a schedule i need to know whats going on and they dont tell me anything #im absolutely losing my mind i think im more stressed out now than when i was looking for work for 3/4 months #the depression and anxiety is through the roof and growing and i don't know what the fuck to do with myself or this whole situation #i even called yesterday and was like uh??????????? Hello??????#all i was told was that they would call me #im so fuckin nauseous about all of this #im sick of waiting by the phone like a lost puppy wondering if im going to be working the next day #i cant live like this im at wits end #rambles

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neeturnal · 11 months

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i'm actually so stressed about money it's not even a joke like oh my god

#frugal-ness + guilt about food do not mix #i eat a meal and i'm like #'oh so not only was it EXPENSIVE it's also BAD FOR ME IM RUININGMYSELF #etc etc #like i worked less this week and normally that's fine #but my paycheck i just got oh boy.#not NEARLY enough to cover all my stuff #like literally my paycheck only paid for half of my fuckass groceries it's ridiculous #and i meab i havé a (moderate) amount of money saved like i won't actually be unintentionally going hungy just #ugh #it makes me soooo fucking guilty like #i had two portions of dinner tn and my brain was losing its fucking mind how not only should i feel guilty for the amount of food it was but #now the amount of MONEY each serving is probably costing #i'm losing my mind guys #i didn't even buy much unhealthy food i thiught for thé most part i bought cheap vegetables and staples that last a while like eggs and stuf #but ughhhh #UGHHH #WHY ARE WE HERE #JUST TO SUFFER #🥯.txt

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dannysboi · 2 years

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The horrors are NOT neverending, in just two weeks I WILL have different problems! They are always changing and there's beauty in adventure like rosethorns and leg breaks

#my torture ends in a week #it was gonna be two months but only one week now #im still losing my mind and crying every 6 hours when i think too hard but now only for a week!#sorry im like #the difficult part of trauma therapy just got moved up from two months away to just a week #im excited cause ill stop worrying about it afterwards #ill deal with repercussions but im tired of yhe anxiety of anticipation of hurt #wanna go straight to the bruise that rises to the surface and fades

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orcelito · 1 year

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genuinely tho me jumping right into reading volume 9 of trimax and then volume 10 (and then most of the rest of the manga) on the night before i had a presentation at 9:30 am (that was entirely not prepared) was literally one of the most unhinged decisions ive ever made

this is what a hyperfixation does to a person

#speculation nation #like that experience was transcendent. i will NEVER be repeating it again but it sure was something #crying 5 times in a night chugging my monster perusing the wolfwood tag tearfully as i listen to the same sad song on repeat for an hour #struggling to get myself to work on the presentation but continuously going back to the manga bc it was SOOO GOOOD #me being like 'im gonna need a few days to process and heal' after reading volume 10 but then after an hour just. starting reading more.#gettign only 2 hours of sleep bc i was like 'ok i need to recover from crying Five Times and then i will focus entirely on this'#literally what is wrong with me lmfao. this sure was something.#this was literally just last week. i can hardly believe it.#this happened on tuesday/wednesday. i spent wednesday recovering. then on thursday i was like 'ok time to write'#there was hardly ANY wait time before i jumped into my next writing project #bc i had the idea after volume 10 but waited until i finished the manga to see where would be the best time to implement it #& that shit with the plants was the PERFECT time. i knew as soon as it happened that That was what i was gonna use.#wrote chapter 1 within a day (while working) then chapter 2 within a day (while working)#then chapter 3 within 2 days (while working AND doing family stuff)#guys i havent had a proper day off of work in over a week bc i covered on tuesday and came in on wednesday and covered on sunday #uhm. sunday before yesterday. i think my last day off was actually uh. the thursday before? a week and a half ago.#and im not getting a day off until thursday. two whole goddamned weeks. i am having a fucking time for sure.#and what do you know that coincides with The Time. oh i dont think it was even thursday. when the fuck was my last day off #uhmmm. oh haha it was that tuesday. aka the 18th. i havent had a goddamned day off since the 18th.#head in my hands. i am losing my fucking mind.#literally unhinged. and it makes sooo much sense now lmfao.

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philzokman · 2 years

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NWVER TAKE PHILOSOPHY i have never felt more pain and agony in my life i’ve had to condense 80 pages worth of notes into my memory for tomorrow so i can discuss. checks palms. utilitarianism and arguments in action losing my mind

#flashback to last week when i had to write two essays on whether god exists or not at. 8am. EIGHT IN THE MORNGIWNDBEKDHD #losing my mind a little bit fellas pray for me #JHDLABDHSSN #IM GOING YO WIN THOUGH ITS FINE !!!!!!!#real #not fake #lea.txt

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