#im going to reread. all three books soon

[punmster]

i've come to accept that i'm bad at writing romance, but at least i'm not as bad as the source material

[yelspyder]

˚‧⁺.- Nah, just killing the boredom

↳summary: basically Miles having a (big) crush on his classmate (you ofc)

↳characters: Miles Morales

↳Gn! Reader

↳notes: i finally posted something after so long 💪 im not posting as often here on tumblr because of my lack of motivation, but I promise to try to post as much as possible 😼 i swear i'll try to avoid disappearing again and work on my asks. this one is short but i hope you like it

MILES peeked to the side, seeing the book you were reading hidden from the math teacher, which he didn't blame you for doing since this class was super boring.

You were a transfer student who recently joined the school. The first time he saw you in the halls, Miles froze for a few seconds. It wasn't his fault you were pretty. Since then, Miles has tried everything he can to interact with you, but to no avail. He absolutely hated his shyness in those moments when he was prevented from having any interaction with you.

Miles tried to recognize the book by its cover, only to read the title and stumble upon a book he's never heard anyone talk about. Tearing a piece of paper from his notebook, Miles quickly grabbed a pen, writing the name of the book you were reading. Just in case, he thought. He then took the piece of paper and folded it, putting it in his pocket so he don't lose it.

Also bored with all the equations the teacher was writing on the blackboard, Miles surreptitiously grabbed his sketchbook and opened it to a blank page, making sure the teacher didn't see him. Pencil in hand, he began making small squiggles on the page. Absentmindedly, Miles ended up being quite entertained with the drawing, detaching himself from the class while focusing on drawing.

This didn't last long, until the bell rang, indicating the end of the last class of the day. Miles didn't take long to pack up his stuff and get up, ready to go home.

Three days later, again in math class, Miles spied on you. He felt his heart flutter, watching you absently chew on the tip of your pencil as you looked around the room, looking for something to entertain yourself with. How can someone look beautiful without even trying?

Miles then gathered all his courage, and threw a crumpled piece of paper on your desk. Your attention returned to the crumpled piece of paper on your desk. Looking at Miles, you could see him nervously motioning for you to unfold and read the paper. As soon as you opened the paper, you saw impeccable handwriting on it.

I see that you like to read books, and that book you've been bringing to school recently is one of my favorites! The protagonist is definitely my favorite character, even more so after chapter 20, not to mention that the turnaround in his personality in the third book of the saga is incredible 0>0

When you read what was written, you smiled, without delay to scribble something on the paper and crumple it up again, throwing it to Miles' desk. He eagerly unfolded the paper, and read what you wrote, before writing back - in a not-so-pretty, more hurried stroke this time - and throwing the paper back to you.

At the end of the day, Miles had the dumbest smile on his face as he read and reread the notes exchanged during class.

Little did you know that he had spent all of his allowance and the last two whole days dedicated to reading those books to get a good first impression.

[seeingivy]

bsfs older brother sukuna asks!

OUCH like you're literally crazy thank you so much. random side tangent that no one asked about but basically my mom has a masters in english literature and likes to read/write a lot (which is where i think i get that from) but basically we were talking about books that are meant to me read as books or other writing that is more like cinematic? if that makes sense.

like some people on here write fic that's really prose based and beautifully written. like truly I think the talent lies in how they choose to string the words together that always leaves me in awe. another irl author that does this a lot is celeste ng (ronnie book rec! everything I never told you is one of my favorite books ever)

but then some books are very very plot driven and kind of have plot as the main thing that kind of draws me in. I definitely think i'm this type of writer more where I know that my talent isn't necessarily in how I string the words together (not that I think it's bad, I just think that the way I build something up and make a plot out of something is kind of where I have the most fun and think I do the best in terms of the stuff I put out) an irl book that does this is the seven husbands of evelyn hugo - where it's very jam packed and driven by the actual events of the book as opposed to the actual wording and sentence structure of how they're written.

anyway this ask just validated what I was thinkiNG LOL bc I do think I tend to write some thats more like sucker punch yolo as opposed to really working on writing that's more prose like (and I admire people who can do that because I literallly fumble with normal words, like @/theragethatisdesire and @/neptuneblue are SOOO skilled at this that it always leaves me speechless. anyways.)

thank you again pookie 💌

literally that's emotional whiplash. I reread the entire thing myself (which is crazy, because I rarely reread my own works after writing them, but I do find myself reaching to read this one sometimes) and LORD like i actually kind of forgot the stuff in the beginning so PROPS TO YOU and it's so sweet that you felt all the feels that were going on that makes my heart so so warm.

heavy on the poor weird child me. mind you that both of these characters internal monologue/and somewhat of their backstory is based on me in real life and heavy on loving little weird child you and knowing that they're still in you somewhere fighting in whatever way they can (for me its fanfic....which is very on brand when I think about it)

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!! 💌 idk where that all came from in three days but it did and im actually very very proud of it so it makes me so so happy that you enjoyed it!

anyways! idk I hope to write some more soon but someone in my family is having a five wedding events week business going on so i'm like out of capacity all weekend (and already overstimulated from so much interaction)

[andyxcds]

babel rant

okay so i read babel by r.f kuang and i really cannot stop thinking about it.

like i wrote a long piece of my mind and anyone can read it but it might uhm, ruffle some feathers...

anyways im going to reread this soon, if anyone wants to talk literally dm me or reply.

Babel by R.F. Kuang is a literary masterpiece which explores the concepts of racism, and the consequences of elitism, and can be compared to the likes of the Secret History.

“That's the beauty of learning a new language. It should feel like an enormous undertaking. It ought to intimidate you. It makes you appreciate the complexity of the ones you know already.”

To some extent that seems to be the issue I face when I begin learning a language. There is often some battle in my mind because I am made up of only one tongue. When I speak in English, I think in English. Therefore, when I am told something in the tongue of another, I have no choice but to turn it into something I understand. There is hope that some underlying knowledge is made clear to me when faced with a foreign tongue.

“That's just what translation is, I think. That's all speaking is. Listening to the other and trying to see past your own biases to glimpse what they're trying to say. Showing yourself to the world, and hoping someone else understands.”

When Kuang takes it out of the context of speaking, translation becomes something of objectivity. It is transformed into a means of understanding in which topics such as feelings, emotions, ideas, and values are given a new perspective. I could elaborate on my feelings to a stranger in hopes they can understand how I feel. I could express my observations to a friend and hope they have observed the same. I could share my ideas to a classroom and pray that they can easily grasp and memorize them. I could proclaim my opinions and values to the world hoping they may be able to act in the same way as I.

“How slender, how fragile, the foundations of an empire. Take away the centre, and what’s left? A gasping periphery, baseless, powerless, cut down at the roots.”

This is where Kuang revealed her prowess. Her plotting was ever so brilliant in the sense that she decidedly recreated the falling of Jericho, Babel, and Egypt. Three of the most influential venues in the Bible. She begins to paint Robin as Joshua, the soldier of God who was an important part of bringing down the walls of Jericho, in the context of bringing down the British empire from striking against those of China. However, she also creates a contrast between the Babel of the Bible and the Babel of the Great Empire of Britain. Finally, she paints Robin, not as Moses, almost rather close to God inflicting plagues upon those of Britain.

As all these come toward the end of the book, it should be observed that Kuang has a habit of inflicting tragedy as a form of hooking the reader. From the beginning of the book, our main character, Robin has already gone through many hardships, although very little of his life before Lovell was reduced to nothing short of a bad memory he prefers to hide from himself. Even his name, his birth name, was something he did not seem to have much reverence for, seeing that he rarely mentioned it to his friends. From my understanding, his personality was extroverted but shy, and level-headed and could walk away when he knew he was close to anger. Careful but painfully addicted to and obsessed with the idea of punishment and being punished. The abuse he faced in Lovell’s home could frankly be blamed for the violence he displayed towards the end. His anger towards his father, himself, and his friends impacted who he chose to become in the face of inevitable death.

“English did not just borrow words from other languages; it was stuffed to the brim with foreign influences, a Frankenstein vernacular. And Robin found it incredible, how this country, whose citizens prided themselves so much on being better than the rest of the world, could not make it through an afternoon tea without borrowed goods.”

Back to the context of Britain, Kuang refers to English being Frankenstein vernacular, imposing that English is a language made of many other languages. Some of these languages include the romance languages– Romanian, French, Spanish, Portuguese, and Italian– which originally stem from Vulgar Latin, a language most to all scholars were required to fluent in to work in Babel. She later goes on to establish through the mind of Robin that the Britons were nothing short of hypocritical or rather ignorant to the actions of colonialism. But just as she lets Robin have these opinions of the British, I was equally struck when she wrote further about Robin’s addiction to survival. That was when I tried to put the two together. Robin’s need for indulging in the splendor Babel had offered to him, while understanding that what they were doing was wrong, was almost similar to the British scholars and citizens being aware that they were exploiting resources and knowledge they desperately needed from places they believed were below them. It could also be seen in contrasting tones being that Robin was already self-concious in the way the Britons were greedy and selfish.

“So, you see, translators do not so much deliver a message as the rewrite the original. And herein lies the difficulty - rewriting is still writing, and writing always reflects the authors ideology and biases.”

Here, Kuang brings her story out of a page and into life. She is tackling the understanding that often, pieces of fiction written in foreign languages is more than often given new meaning when translated into another language. This often is impacted by current world issues or bias and the ideologies of the translator. Take the Bible for example, so many editions have been published in English from the original Hebrew; the KJV, NIV, NSIV, and the rather blasphemous Gay Bible (I despise this one personally.) Most people love to argue (some atheists) that the Bible was altered so many times for any of the words in it to be true, and some believe that regardless of what it says, the meaning still stands the same. However, in all the versions I have listed, one doesn’t particularly sit right amongst the rest because it is said to go against some of the principles the other Bibles uphold.

Another example would be the Illiad which I am currently re-reading! I have tackled two different versions of it and somehow one makes more sense than the other, but I feel as though the other is somewhat closer to the original Greek version. Altogether, I mean to say that Kuang has addressed what she may have found to be an issue she may have faced when writing. She states in her Author’s Note that the issue with historical fiction and written history is tht some writers get dates and important things wrong. Imagine how bad that would be when translated fiction was brought into play.

[stellewriites]

questions about books! thanks for the tag @mikichko @pricegouge 🫂

1. the last book I read

i’m glad my mom died by jennette mccurdy

so fucking tough but i really enjoyed it

2. a book I recommend

the martian by andy weir

i’d previously struggled with first person in books and i was never into science but this changed my whole view on both,, mark is so funny and down to earth (badum tss!) you can’t help but get invested and the science is so easily explained - also i liked that a lot of it could genuinely be done except the initial sandstorm like it wasn’t bullshit for the plot. if you’ve seen the film then still give the book a go bc it goes a different way and it’s worth it imo

3. a book I couldn't put down

the book thief by markus zusak

it’s been a fair few years since i read this (ten i think? shit) but i remember coming back from college and reading it every day as soon as i got home and absolutely bawling all the way through. it’s on my reread list

4. a book l've read twice or more

despite watching things over and over i struggle reading things twice even when i really want to - but!! if graphic novels/comics count then ive read the watchmen a few times

5. a book on my tbr

my family and other animals by gerald durrell

one my grandma recommended years ago that i never got around to but im determined to read at some point. only short but it’s meant to be funny

6. a book l've put down

the first harry potter - tried before all of the author’s bullshit but i really struggled to enjoy it as much as people said i would. didnt even get halfway

8. a favorite book from childhood

a lot of these have been from my childhood lmao that’s when i did most of my reading but ill go further back into my niche zombie phase as a young teen and say world war z by max brooks (also loved his zombie survival guide,, it was like a special interest pls don’t ask)

9. a book I would give to a friend

i don’t really read anything similar to my friends? they either like practical craft books or band biographies,, i recced im glad my mom died to a co worker if that counts?

10. a fiction book I own

my best friend’s exorcism - i couldn’t tell you if it’s any good, ive not yet read it. a lot of my books are bought for me and it takes me like at least five years to get around to them

11. a nonfiction book I own

battersea’s a cat a day

a book where this pet charity has put together 365 tiny true stories about different cats to read every day 🥲🥲 it’s very cute

12. what I am currently reading

none atm - need to get on one i’ve been recommended soon

13. what l am planning on reading next

the one i’ve been recommended as mentioned above! it’s a romcom so a lil new to me for books,, i usually stick to fics for this type of thing and go more sci-fi/horror in published books but i think ill enjoy it

14. my shelfie

not an accurate shelfie on the left because it’s about 5 years old but i wanted to include my cat here

the covers are so sun bleached now in comparison on the right ahsjajkls - got maybe three shelves for books and one for art books/comics?

no pressure tags: @jackrabbitem @sentientcave @madstronaut @valkyri @boolger @noicedog @w00lgathering @xxdrixx @ohlawdthebirds

[gleasonlovesjasontodd]

GIRL, I WAS IN CLASS WHEN YOU POSTED SO I COULD ONLY REACT BUT DAMN CONGRATS!!!!! The lunar new year is coming up, so guess who's gonna go buy and eat some grapes as redemption for the New Year? HAHAHAHAHA. IDK if it's gonna work or not. Hopefully, it does. HE IS REALLY IS A IRL VERSION OF JASON TODD PHYSICALLY AND THE VIBE IM GETTING ITS ALSO PERSONALITY WISE. Does he do sports or martial arts or just gym? If yes, it's like he really is Jason. I have a feeling that maybe some siblings or a best friend/s may come in soon to the updates. (unless he wants you all to himself) HAHAHAHAHA

I love the updates. I get giddy and so excited when I read them (and reread them again). I shared it with my best friend, who said she completely agrees with me that he is Jason and is so happy for you. We called you the Jason girlie.

Also, you're a bow girlie, too? and agreed on how some athletes (not all I know decent ones as well) are just not worth dating. For context, I'm a figure skater, and some hockey players are just waiving red flags.

so he did baseball once and never again would he do because he is so mature like me he couldn’t stand being on a team with immature people so now he just does the gym which i think is very hot he does have three brothers and they each remind me of dick, tim, and damian i feel very honored to be called the jason girlie and yes i am a huge huge bow girly have been before it was cool to be a bow girl i always wearing something that has a bow on it and my room is very bow core i personally have never seen a hockey boy i’ve only read them in books because where i live we don’t have hockey as a sport but definitely only be around someone who likes you and won’t judge

[familyvideostevie]

📚LET'S READ

congrats on one year lovely!! im a little late to the beach but im hoping to sit away from the water and get some reading done 🤔 i am a SUCKER for murder mystery of any kind, i love anything where all the pieces come together in a satisfying way and of course a good twist reveal!! buuuut that being said I am also a lover of anything written by neil gaiman, always a go to for me

i hope you’re having a wonderful day, no worries if none of this is up your street!! this is pretty much just me popping in for a chat as well 🖤

hi mavis!!!!! im so glad to see u!!!

i've seen that you really like richard osman, is that right? i don't read a ton of thrillers/murder mysteries because i am boring but am trying to read more of them!! i also adore neil, so hopefully a few of these are things you'd be in to!!

-The Locked Tomb series by Tamsyn Muir. I recommended this on another post but it's really one of my favorite series. It's got mystery (like, so much mystery, honestly I didn't know what the hell was going on most of the time) and it's really brilliant writing and it has the logical and emotional layers that I feel I get from lots of Gaiman's work, too. It is def hard sci-fi/fantasy, but it's got literally countless twist reveals that are so entertaining I am going to be rereading the first three books soon (the fourth comes out in October).

-You might have read him, but anything by Phillip Pullman! His Dark Materials was my favorite series as a kid and I re-read it a few years ago and it holds up very well. Again, much closer to Gaiman than a murder-mystery, but really so good. And it's got a new series in the same universe called The Book of Dust that is more adult than the original trilogy!

-A few other authors like Neil that I've enjoyed are Alix E. Harrow and Nnedi Okorafor.

-A coworker of mine loves mysteries and she really enjoyed Anthony Horowitz, who I have no doubt you've heard of/read. I wish I had more murder recs for you, I am going to endeavor to read some!! Please let me know where to start <3

join the celebration!

[acefaun]

My hectic day was ok for me and i am super tired right now. But guess what, i open tumblr, my most beloved lady posts and i see someone has requested the exact thing i wanted 😲.

And my sweet, kind lady is fulfilling ours wish by writing two endings ❤🤧 I'm so happy!!!!!! 💋

I sympathize with you, love. 🤯I hadn't realized how tiring a hectic day could be since I haven't had one in a while. But since I started work Saturday I haven't been able to touch any of my fanfics! AND I HAVE AWESOME IDEAS TOO! Curse my current 7-days-a-week schedule 😩 no time for fics.

I took brief notes at least so when I finally stop running around like a chicken with my head cut off I'm not going to have forgotten the horrible things Tauxolouve is going to do. ✨ If only work wouldn't be murdering me then I'd be able to CAUSE CHAOS.

~On the bright side, I'll get a day off to write all the fanfics I want because I need to get my last wisdom tooth out soon. 😙 It's my last one... So after the surgery I'm going to be stupid. 🤯 I'm only running on 25% wisdom right now. By next month I'll have 0% wisdom left!

(I think the last time I got three wisdom teeth out I feel asleep writing a fic about Zyglavis taking care of me... I'll have to find it! 😝)

And I promised Huedhaut's yandere piece last week, but then was rereading it and decided to add more Huedhaut drama because he wasn't getting as much drama as the other guys.

I have Hue at 9.6K right now which is better, but I'm not sure if adding a murder mystery this late in would make it too long. 💀 But I really high key want to. Because I'm digging the idea.

Shadow Dui gets framed for murdering your best friend. Of course, it could be no other god but the god killer himself! After all, Shadow's already killed one best friend. He could easily kill someone else's.

BUT. This answer is too simple isn't it? Later on, Dui is finally able to contact you through his telepathic powers and he tells you everything he knows. By all means, you can't trust ANYONE in the mansion. The murderer is one of the 12 Zodiacs and is hiding amongst you!

Sadly, this means you can't go to your loving boyfriend Huedhaut with this information because be is sadly ALSO a suspect! You have to find the killer on your own. Leading to interrogations and questions like "Where were you on the night of the murder?"

Huedhaut's going to get so edgy and pissed when he finds out you're investigating the murder and actually succeeding in finding out clues. But... It honestly just makes him love you more becuase you're such a smart goldfish. He knew you were worthy of having the soul of his goddess.

While he doesn't want you to see him as the bad guy, at the same time, he wants to see if you can actually put all of this information that you're gathering together. And if you do find out it's Huedhaut... Well, that's troublesome.

Ever since I found out the moon is an apple, I've been in a hardcore detective mode. I need detective books to read so I can ease my desire for mystery solving.

IM STILL GLAD WE'RE ALL MATCHING THE ENERGY FOR AN UNHINGED TAUXOLOUVE. I CAN'T WAIT TO RETURN TO MY CHAOTIC FANFICS! 💖💖💖

[spider-man-2o99]

what are your favorite comics?

as tempted as i am to just say “i’ll give ya three guesses, and the first two don't count,” and leave it at that for the sake of The Funny, lol—

im not gonna let myself keep going on and on and on for too long, or else this post’ll never get made, but this isn't. like. Everything. brain is just scrampled egg rn so these r a little all over the place but. w/e here r the first “favorite” books that’ve come 2 my mind:

(under the cut because i Ramble*) (*let us also proceed knowing that classic spider-man/spider-man in general goes without saying b/c i am Not typing that much.)

- Spider-Man 2099 (1992) big surprise, i know. lay off! it was my first comic! looking back on it, i probably shouldn't have been reading it as, like. a 9-10(??) year old kid. but. y’know. pish-posh. when the chips’re down, sm2099 was what i had during a real rough time that spanned years without letup, and as a result sm2099 has been a Really Important Thing for me ever since. has the relative decade’s worth of Enrichment ultimately also been worth the requisite Nigh-Obsessive Brainrot? 🤷 i’unno. i’m predisposed to say “well, duh, dude, no shit it has been,” so that's that.

- Spider-Man 2099 Meets Spider-Man (1995) duh. (in seriousness: fun romp of a one-shot, nd i really like that mig and mj were kinda-friends,., .,,.,)

- Moon Knight (1980) MK v1 was the run that REALLY got me into comic books as something more than just a passive casual interest, back in, uhh-- early-early 2020, i think? it definitely... shows its age in not a great way, at times, but otherwise i can’t help but feel a fond affection for the first volume of MK. (Plus, on the art side of things, it’s really cool to see Bill Sienkiewicz developing his iconic signature style over the course of the run!!!)

- Immortal Hulk: The Threshing Place (2020) .......and tbh, every other Immortal Hulk one-shot, as well, but. Threshing Place especially has some just gorgeous art. I can’t stomach visual body horror very well most of the time, but I otherwise really like what I've been able to read of Immortal Hulk.

- Ms. Marvel (2014) genuinely a really good book and also the only Inhumans thing i like (in no small part, im sure, because there is not a lot of Inhumans stuff in it). starting to run out of spoons at this point so i’m just gonna be blunt if u hate kamala khan Fuck You

- Unbelievable Gwenpool (2016) unbelievable gwenpool is Good it’s a Good Comic marvel has just been absolutely massacring the character ever since it ended. in 2019 the Defiler leah williams took poor gwennie out behind the barn and basically just shot her in the back of the fucking head. we will probably never see the character in any significant or serious capacity ever again :(

- Superman’s Girlfriend, Lois Lane (1958-1973) culturally important to the medium of superhero comic books As We Know Them Today. also generally batshit insane to an objectively hilarious degree ❤️

+ honorable mention(s): that one green lantern story where hal jordan slipped on a bar of soap and bumped his head so hard he not only  was immediately rendered unconscious but then also fell promptly into a coma.

ALSO Blue Beetle (2006) it's been so long that i barely remember what happens in it but i Do Remember that it was Good. i really need to reread the run sometime soon...

[hyunjinspark]

Hi Jade, this is Ciel ~ How are you doing, dear?

I hope adressing you by your name isn't uncomfortable for you. It's been quite some time since I sent my message, right? I don't always read every ask, since I mainly go on tumblr past midnight, reading helps me fall asleep. But I do read some of them, and I'm overjoyed to see so many people enjoy your writing. It is, indeed, quite the find among the sea on tumblr (not to lesser anyone else's work!).

I'm sure I told you already how I find your way with words so enchanting. It's always a pleasure for me to read you, one day, I even went back and reread everything of Only Fools. I know I am not most interactive reader, I apologize for that, but do be sure I always pay attention to your updates. As of now, I've read part 12 thrice, and will read it one last time before the next chapter comes out. I love every details and how diligent to your book you are. Even with angst, I feel a certain warmth and comfort while reading. Once again, I find your words and feelings pure in your chapters, and the love you express for Hyunjin is enamoring in itself, as we can feel how much attention and care you have for him behind those words. The way you characterise him is beautiful. I'll lay down my words for part 12 in a reblog, soon enough, after a fourth read!

Now, my thought on deadlines. I demand, stop apologizing, and don't force a deadline on yourself. We, as readers, only want your well-being first and foremost. We enjoy your work, because you enjoy writing it; it's when you pass your emotions and thoughts to us that we enjoy it the most, even if we have to wait a long, it doesn't matter. Waiting is part of the game; I believe the more fidgety we get to know what's coming next, the more we are to feel ecstatic all throughout the reading. It even sparks the need to go back to it numerous times, you can't grasp every details in one.

As well, I want to share on university. I'm on a year-break right now, after three years of attendance, I know how it gets, even if our educational systems are quite different. What I can say is, try to stay healthy, if you feel burnout take a step back, and don't force work on yourself, sometimes going back to it later is worth more and easier.

I'm unsure I've said everything I wanted to, but the main ideas are here. Take care of yourself, once again, waiting is part of the deal, and we are happier knowing you're doing well, instead of trying to do so much at once and stress yourself. I hope my words don't seem too uptight, I believe a wonderful writer deserves charming words as well. As well, english isn't my first language, and I may lack vocabulary to make it shine the way I'd like to.

Oh, one last thing! Last time, I forgot to ask to be added to the taglist, if you kindly will, I'd love to be notified too. As much as I love the suspense when I hop on tumblr and find a new chapter for any fanfic I follow, the fear of missing one is also there!

With care,

Ciel

oh my god ciel, you always make my day with your messages !! this ask is so sweet and i love you. its been quiet a while since ive seen you around and i missed you, im so glad people enjoy my writing too 🥺

you’ve read it thrice ? thank you 😭 for dedicating so much time to my story and im very glad i can make you feel warm even amongst the angst.

thank you so so much, i feel like this reply is just gonna be me saying thank you, but thank you for thinking the way i write and view hyun is enamouring. creating his character has honestly been so fun and exploring that personality is so comforting. i can’t wait for your thoughts on part 12!

and honestly, im used to this kind of university sustem since i had it in my undergraduate as well and usually was able to balance my life, uni and other things but everything is so much harder now since every art project we produce has to be a certain level 😫 i know what you mean about burnout, and im wary of that definitely because for studying art i feel like i have to stay inspired all the time to produce good projects, and then keep that inspiration throughout everything. it can definitely be stressful.

you’re so kind, don’t worry that doesn’t sound uptight at all. its very caring of you and im genuinely surprised you care so much☹️ take care ciel, and i’ll definitely add you to the taglist !

[trans-axolotl]

starting to think about what i want to do for new years resolutions this year! i love making new years resolutions and reflecting on things and ill probably write up a silly pretentious list of new years resolutions in my journal soon but. i think one thing i want to do is just make a list of every book that's been on my radar or that is half complete or that i want to reread in 2023 and make a nice long book list!

another thing i want to do is commit to getting my writing on another platform then tumblr. thinking about posting stuff to medium and also making some instagram accounts to publish stuff in regards to my antipsych research project. i love tumblr for social media but it is not the best for building up a portfolio of work to be able to share with people in my real life!

i have a lot of goals for 2023 lmao. i think they can sort of be seperated into three areas. one area of goals is about my continued eating disorder recovery and overall mental wellness. one set of goals is about my day to day life and like social life and university/neighborhood community life. other set of goals is about my community organizing--i think for the first half of 2023 it's going to be pretty focused on my antipsych community project and getting all that set up. probably reevaulate halfway through the year and try to keep getting involved in some other things.

idk! feeling really motivated and also coming to terms with what reasonable goals were. i was feeling really burnout the past couple of years and feeling like i wasn't doing anything bc a lot of the things i feel most passionate about are community projects that don't exist yet in the area where i live, so if i wanted those things to exist i would have to create them myself. and although i really think that i can create those things--I needed to take care of myself and get my life established enough so that i wasn't getting burnout. it's not worth much to commit myself to causes if i can't actually commit myself to it because i'm burnout and crying all the time. also remembering that not every part of my life has to be about other people--it's okay that part of my life is taking time to do things that bring me joy like ballroom dance. i also am coming to terms with the fact that i might not be able to get as meaningfully involved in things as I would like while im at university because like. school takes up so much fucking time! and in many ways the things i am most qualified and able to do in terms of activism are things that i am not qualifed in able to do in a location where i don't actually live and know the people in that community and know that the people in my community actually need. so i think i'm going to change some of my focus from trying to start things and instead just consistently commit to showing up in smaller more consistent ways for other orgs and let myself get into my passion through my antipsych research project. also i think half the reason i couldn't get as involved in community things as i wanted was because the past two years were also moving to a new place during Covid and having everything be shut down or not accessible because people weren't masking.

idk. long ramble that is just my journal entry for today LMAO i really do treat tumblr like a diary group chat

[iantimony]

tuezdai

i was thinking about crossposting this to dreamwidth and THEN i remembered that ive been looking for an excuse to make. a neocities website. so. :3 i am going to make a neocities page for weekly roundup hehe

relatedly look at this bizarre captcha i got when i went to make an account. like. any of these fools could be robots.

listening: not a lot of music this week but ive been listening to rangedtouch's just king things podcast! i'm listening in order from the beginning and im at about halfway through ep 8 (the dead zone). i really enjoyed their homestuck reread podcast so when that finished i was like. well. i want to listen to these clowns (appreciative) hang out more. time to peruse their back catalog. and ive been enjoying it so far! i wouldn't call myself a huge king-head, i've read carrie, salem's lot, the shining...pet sematary? cujo? a few other misc king stories. there's a short story about a cat that crawls its way down someone's throat i think was stephen king and that one lives in my head rent-free. so definitely a lot of books ive never even heard of in here, and i definitely haven't read the Big King books (the stand and dark tower, mainly) but it doesn't matter too much for podcasting :)

sidebar, i told my roommate about the podcast and she misunderstood the premise and thought it was like. audiobook style. like they were reading the books out loud. i was like babe the stand episode is less than 4 hours long. do you think it's on like 10x speed. lololol

music-wise, @delta-orionis has some DELICIOUS synthwave playlists that ive been working out and studying to. it's like 40 hours long. go nuts

reading: i went to the library with the intention of wandering the nonfiction section until i found something that looked fun but they're remodeling soon so a ton of the stacks aren't open for wandering rn...i can reserve stuff and pick it up but they're not accessible to the public :( the fiction section is though so i grabbed "the birthday of the world", a short story collection by ursula le guin! i thought short stories would be nice because of my lack of time to properly get engaged in a Book and i was right, it rules. i read the first three or so last weekend when i took myself to brunch at a new tea place on main street (3/5 for the brunch, the restaurant is brand new so there are definitely some things that went wrong - food took forever to come out, i was frequently forgotten, after i was seated i waited for like 10 minutes to be noticed by waitstaff, when i finally got my food the rice was crunchy, etc. i would go back to eat there but not any time soon, maybe in a few months after theyve been open for a while. the tea RULED though. their gimmick is like...travel? airplane? so all the staff introduce themselves as flight attendants, and their rewards card is formatted like a passport book where once you get a row of stamps for a certain continent you get a free tea, and once you fill out the whole book you get another free tea........it's so cute.......) actually now im not sure if it's the location the tea came from or the Type of tea? because that top column goes from japan to england which is not exactly a Region. eurasia????? idfk. still cute

anyways. the short stories. i read the first three ("Coming of Age in Karhide", "The Matter of Seggri", and "Unchosen Love") and really enjoyed them! i never finished Left Hand of Darkness (i will return to her one day i promise) but it definitely wasn't required reading even though the first story was set on that same planet. the next story is "Mountain Ways" which is actually available online for those interested :)

watching: more evangelion, and my roommate put on "cunk on earth" for me and it rules it's so funny. obsessed with her.

making: embroidery progress! about halfway done filling in the headphone cord.

as a self reminder, the task list for finishing this is:

fill in headphone cord

words along the side

fill stitch for hair

color in eyes

add misc hair flyaways

misc: quantum midterm thursday......it's open note so im not as frantic as last semester's exams but still. ah. ahhhh. :(

[my-hands-hurt]

hi, here from your zombie fic...too nervous to comment on it but maybe once its done i'll reread it and leave a comment every chapter on my specific thoughts. but for now i will leave you with: thank you for writing something that lets my emotionally constipated self cry. i read all 42 chapters in roughly three sittings, i love it, and everytime something happened that i called was going to happen, i got so giddy about it that i had to step away for a second to squeal. even if it made me cry harder in the end [ ie the marriage proposal thing. i dont think anything even made me think it would happen, i just know this fic is misery itself, and i went "lol, wouldnt this make it even SADDER." and then it happened. ] ty favourite anon fic writer

ty for enjoying the fic! i completely get the whole beig too nervous to comment on stuff i do it all the time dskfhlksdghj

hopefully soon ill have more time to write but i have been super busy lately L

anywho sdfjhdfg im really glad you like the fic and i cant wait to hear your thoughts if you do comment when the book is done :>>>

[papermachedragons]

you can tell me to buzz off if you like but it sounds like you could use taking a step back from fic ideas, or trying to get a handle on them at least. sometimes putting a lot of pressure on yourself to write and produce fantastic works can kill off creativity more than just not writing at all. if something sticks, then that's brilliant and you can give it a go. if it doesn't get finished because something else sticks instead, that's okay! half a fic at least means you've got something to come back to or pilfer from for other fics. equally, if nothing sticks and ideas continue to come in tidal waves that you can't break through, then let them wash over you. it's alright to take some time to reset, especially if it's stressing you out a lot. sending virtual hugs if you like them and hoping your sleep schedule gets less out of whack soon 💛

Hey <3 <3

Yeah, you pretty much hit everything right on the head.

I think this came about because I tried to take a step back from fic writing, but not a big enough step? Like I got top surgery in march and in the week leading up to that and the two months following post op, I very deliberately took a break from writing. Did not write at all. Barely even thought about it and forced myself to not even read anything I'd written previously. To take care of myself and my chronic illness and give myself the best chance at recovery without excarbating my chronic illness or aggravating my healing scars.

Now on month 3 of not writing, I'm in this hell of not being able to focus on the long fic I'm writing. Like I can't get my mind to focus at all on this baby. So I go, well, I could work on my other wips and maybe they could get me out of my writing slump and my brainfog unfocus hell. But I don't pick just one fic. I just sorta,,, muddle about all of them. Not that I'm coming up with new fic ideas, just bouncing between old wips all the time (and one, just 1, new fic idea for a new fandom that came unpromted) but then in the middle of that muddling about, my brain goes, "hey hey hey you want to write original stories too, right? Like you want to be a published author and write books and all that?? Have you worked on those original ideas lately? Well, shouldn't you be doing that, then? Hey hey hey what about taking a break from all that fanfiction and trying to work on these plots to these original stories? Wouldn't that be so fun???" And that's where this tsunami of fics and stories come from. It's just this massive wave of fics and original story ideas overwhelming me because I'm trying to work on all of them, and it just paralyses me, so I can't write at all

But yeah, you're definitely right. I'm definitely putting pressure on myself, too. I especially get really stuck on pressuring myself to write when two or three (or more) months pass where I'm unable to write/don't write anything. So you're right on the nose that I'm pressuring myself. Which also just excarbates the issue of tsunami fics and ideas without me just picking one to focus on

I also haven't read an actual book in months. Mainly because of aforementioned pressuring myself to write. It's like I'm pressuring myself to the point where I can't do anything else, because if I'm spending time reading books, then I'm not even trying to write and that's not allowed and im wasting time, and i can't do that, i have to write, i have to write, I can't just spend all my time reading or watching movies even though I need to take an actual break and my body needs to lay back and relax because my chronic illness is screaming at me today but I can't do that because I need to write

And it's so severe and all-encompassing that it makes me feel guilty for picking up an actual book, even though reading is a vital part of writing. So I think I'm gonna force myself to chill out with writing and read some books. I've been wanting to reread Perry Jackson the last while, so I think I'll read that series. It's nice and easy for me to read because of the writing style and I've read it before, which is exactly what I need when I'm in unfocus brainfoggy hell. And hey, this time I can even wear my camp half-blood t shirt because I chopped my tits off, it's a win win.

And thank you for the virtual hug! I'm sending the warmest of hugs right back to you! 💛🌻

[livingasaghost]

just want you all to know what my brain has been doing this week

wow everything is expensive OMG IM MOVING SOON i have to start packing sometime MY BIRTHDAY IS IN THREE WEEKS julia's taking me to meet the red pandas for my bday IM SEEING TAYLOR SWIFT TWICE i should change my address soon HOW AM I GOING TO GET A COUCH INTO MY NEW APARTMENT oooh therapy is actually good I SHOULD SHARE MY FEELINGS MORE how am i supposed to share my feelings FUCK SAM HUNT IS SOOOO GOOD i miss the bromance book club I SHOULD REREAD SARAH J MAAS remember black sails I LOVE FLINTSILVER FUCK hmmm should i start mythic quest I AM FUCKING OBSESSED WITH MYTHIC QUEST i love found family shows IAN GRIMM IS SOOOOOO HOT when should i watch yellowjackets GOD I NEED TO CLEAN MY ROOM why clean my room when i just have to pack it all up in a month anyway OH MY GOD IM GOING TO HAVE MY OWN APARTMENT WHAT THE FCUKKKK

[megatraven]

UGHHHHH I FINISHED READING LOVE BURNS BRIGHT AND UGH UGH UGH SO FUCKIGN GOOD FUCK