#im just a stupid little idiot that wants to be friends with as many people as possible but also wants really close ones but has problems

[shivermewhiskerz]

.

//Venting in Tags:: TW Sewerslide and shit like that

[post3l]

iam showing symptoms of mental illness!!!!!!!! /vent

[0verstepping]

.

[bamsara]

what are your most favorite tropes? :3c

IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED:

Near death experiences

Emotional revelations due to said near death experiences

Enemies to Friends to Lovers

Mutual Pining but they believe its unrequieted

"you're my worst enemy but you're so important to me"

Drunk chapter where at least One fist fight happens

Bridal carry after someone gets injured

Slow Burn...of course

"i got you this gift because it benefits me and im not telling you how" (the benefit is seeing the other person enjoy the gift)

Force Alliances or Temporary Truces

"I don't like killing but I'll do it for you"

"I prefer to kill my problems but I won't, for you."

Or: "This person has no idea how many people I've killed in order to protect or provide for them and I'm going to keep it that way."

Mean or Villian Character is actaully a really good Sibling/Parent/Child,ect and has someone they care about

Or better, Villian character adopts child AND is a good parent

Everyone knows the pairing likes each other except for the pairing

Temporary (or non-temp)Amnesia

"I learn your favorite things because I plan to use them against you one day" (proceeds to not do that) (proceeds to get them food or items that persons likes just because they like them)

Breaking and Entering. Literally.

Person A is in love, Person B says they're not but they're 10x times worse actaully

Slip-of-the-tongue/Accidental confessions. Doesn't have to be love confessions but just "whoops i was not supposed to say that"

Biting as a love language

One is feral and bloodthirsty but is put in the position of 'protecting an idiot' because the other is also feral and has no self-preservation. Both characters must be badass, just equally stupid

Kiss on the head/cheek while the other person is sleeping

Bloodstained kiss

Heat-of-battle confession about something

Protagonist refusing to become villian or repeat villian mistakes, not in a 'owo i cant do that its bad' and more like 'fuck you you dont get to see what you wanted to make of me'

Signifier of 'this is my friend/family/lover'. Could anything between a ring, a jacket over someone's shoudlers or scent marking, anything

"if im immortal, then you gotta be too or we both dyin"

Knight x Their Charge

Human x Non-Human

Sunshine x Grump

Character that looks sooooo cute. Oh he's a little fucked up actaully

"ahhaha he's such a freak haha. i need him carnally."

They are mortal enemies. They are also best friends.

Hostage / Rescued trope plus Hostage / Doesn't get to rescue because the hostage killed everyone already

Plot info that's missing that's vital to the story and it's revealed that One of the pairing or someone in the group knew the info the entire time

"I said mean things to you because I hate you, so why am I feeling guilty now"

There was only One Bed

Really competent and scary character is really GOOD at a harmless and charming small hobby completely uncharacteristic to their public persona

Nightmares. And then sleeping in the same bed because of nightmares

Cultural differences / Language Barrier

Character gets so surprised flustered they trip over something or break something and it topples and it starts a chain reaction like a cartoon

There are more but these are some of which I can remember off the top of my head. I've written many of these myself in several of my stories and will continue to do so until the end of time, esp my faves

[penkura]

Hi! I saw that your requests are open!

Would you be alright writing headcanons for a GN!Reader(Fem is fine too if it's a struggle) for Sanji and Zoro with an idiot reader? The type to throw themselves in danger, believe people at face value, able to succeed a mission by failing all the instructions ect.

Im a big fan of idiot readers because I am one myself, if you could add some cuddling in there too I would be so grateful

Take care!

Hi!! Gosh, this was fun to write lol. Sanji and Zoro are my boys, they would both def end up with idiot readers lol. I hope you like it! :)

Sanji

You, an idiot?

His precious, darling beloved?

Never, he’d fight anyone who said you were! He’d never call you that himse—

Oh there you go again, throwing yourself in front of Luffy. Haven’t you learned he’ll be fine?

You do it every time, and even after Sanji and the others tell you to stop being so self sacrificing, they get enough of that with Zoro

Its fine, its fine, Sanji knows you just want to protect your friends

Its even fine when you nearly fall for an obvious scam of some woman needing money to pay off debtors, and it just happened to be the same amount in your hand

Thank goodness he was nearby and able to grab your hand to get you away from that, telling you what was going on

You felt really stupid for that, but it was fine, no problems, Sanji kept you from losing your money, Nami would’ve killed you both if you had

Its not fine when you end up injured this time, jumping in front of him when an enemy throws a spear at him

It barely grazed you when you pushed Sanji out of the way, but he’s still horrified knowing it was because you were protecting him that it happened

No matter how many times Chopper tries to Sanji that you’ll be okay, it wasn’t as bad as it could have been, he’s still upset with himself for being distracted by another enemy

Sanji wants to distract himself but you won’t let him leave you alone, dragging him into the bed you’re staying in that night and demanding cuddles since you’re hurt (not that hurt but still)

He’s glad to obliged, holding you close and burying his face in your shoulder while you stroke his hair

“Sorry I worried you, Sanji.”

“You’ve got to stop throwing yourself in front of people…”

He just doesn’t want to lose you

Zoro

He’s the one that calls you an idiot the most

In a loving way the majority of the time, but other times he really does mean it

The day you almost got swept away to another crew because on of their members tried to sell you a sob story about needing medicine for a sick kid?

Yeah you were an idiot for that one

The time you run to protect Nami, shoving her out of the way and receiving a deep gash on your abdomen

Zoro knows you want to protect people, to protect your family

But you should let him handle things sometimes!

He was on his way to protect Nami himself, but of course, you being you, ended up jumping ahead and pushing her away from the Marine attacking her

After all the Marines are taken care of, Chopper has you in the infirmary on Sunny immediately to assess your wounds

You got the worst of it, good job!

Zoro hears you got the worst of it, say your prayers because he’s pissed

Not entirely at you, partially at the Marine that got you, but still at you too

“You’re lucky his weapon didn’t have poison on it or somethin’!”

“I don’t think the Marines use poison, Zoro.”

“That’s not the point!”

You let him go off, telling you everything that could’ve gone wrong

It’s rare for even you to see this side of him, but it’s nice to know he cares this much

Eventually Zoro calms down, taking a deep breath before he walks back over and drags you into a hug

“You’re such a damn idiot you know?”

You nod, but smile, “but I’m your idiot, right?”

He rolls his one good eye and nods himself

“Yeah, you’re my idiot.”

He wouldn’t change a thing if it meant you were his and he was yours

Though he would like you be a little more careful in the future

[enderwoah]

jimmy solidarity is so intrinsically mind-meltingly confusing i love him dearly and i want to squish him with a passion and i want him to win (or lose) the next life series installment and here is why

(this is a very long insanity fuelled rant sorry but if you too are obsessed with jimmy solidarity and the concept of him actually not being pathetic and possibly winning heres the post for you)

jimmy solidarity is the kind of guy that literally has one gimmick and its being the most pathetic person on every server he has the pleasure of being on. he is the wet cat of a man that gets bullied and taken advantage of and nobody listens to him when he complains or objects to anything and yet not once has he truly gotten angry about it because hes just that nice of a guy. sort of.

cause i dont know about yall, but jimmy solidarity is kind of a bastard to me?? i will never forget him swindling joey out of 50% of his gunpowder profits (u think that wasnt swindling?? consider the following: he was earning NOTHING before joey started doing gunpowder on his own. NOTHING. and yet all he had to do was go over and put on his little sad pitiful pathetic song and dance and beg for a cut of joey's profits and suddenly: whats that? a net profit?) i will never forget the sheer amount of times this guy has had to hold himself back from straight up killing or aattacking someone; not because of morals or kindness or goodwill, but out of spite. but out of "i need to be better than this person it hurts them more if i dont kill them in cold blood (in my head)." i will never forget the amount of times he has just straight up punched someone in the nose (/rp) because they were being mildly annoying in the middle of a conversation.

im not saying hes a mastermind thats manipulating everyone by acting lame but also just a little bit?? minus the manipulation part?? hes proven on multiple occassions that he isnt like stupid idiot baby man. like yeah he can be a little incompetent sometimes but so can scar and by now we have ALL recognised that scar is terrifying and could raze the server by himself if he so pleased. i think if jimmy solidarity's main bit wasnt 'its funny when my friends bully me' he could genuinely cause some serious damage. i think the one time hes like ever made a trap on his own in the life series (the one in his doorway in last life) it worked flawlessly which. like. a trap. in the life series. working flawlessly. hello. sure it was basic but the fact that it worked without a hitch should alone be a testament to his ability

and if thats too obscure for u i mean we can step out of the life series for a little bit and just direct you to the fact that he isnt bad at minecraft like at all?? if u havent had the pleasure of watching his dodgebolt 1v3 i really reccomend it because youd THINK that someone bad at minecraft would be trembling in his boots and being in a total panic in that situation. hell even someone AMAZING at minecraft in that position (grian) literally sounded on the verge of throwing up for his entire time and thats FAIR. thats NORMAL.

all i am saying is that jimmy solidarity rolled up to this 1v3, said 'ive got this,' and took out two people in literally a second and a half. and then just chill-ly said 'ive got this' again. the only time he sounded mildly panicked was when tommy was making him dodge for a ridiculously long amount of time. as soon as tommy missed twice- or, rather, as soon as he dodged tommy's bolts twice, mine brother in craft took one shot after like five seconds and it was over. every SINGLE time i decide to watch a jimmy mcc pov im sitting there like. 'damn. DAMN?? JIMMY SOLIDARITY???? POPPING OFF???????" at like more than one point every single time. there are so many other places that hes demonstrated that he isnt bad at minecraft but its late/early and my memory doesnt work like it used to

which brings me back to the life series. since we all know that his 'being bullied hahaheeheehoohoo' bit is a bit (and hey. its a good bit. im not saying its a bad bit. i think its funny and i think it gets even funnier when jim starts fighting back. if youre gonna have a long-lasting gimmick thats a good one and jimmy does a swell job at making it entertaining and also making it clear that it isnt serious) this means that he can un-bit it for a bit. or at least peel away the bit a little.

im just saying jimmy solidarity has huge bastard energy and hes allowed to let it free in the life series!! he will burn things down he will cheer at traps he will fight for his friends he wil fight tooth and nail and claw for his life (he started last life with two lives. he never got any more. he only died due to a trap and due to murder like COME ON). if he wanted to burn down a base he could if he wanted to set up a huge trap PERSONALLY i think he could hell i think if he went up to someone in 1v1 combat he would at least have a chance (depending on the person of course). i mean look at his dodgebolt performance all the man needs is a bow and some distance and hes APPARENTLY set for life!!

ill say it

if jimmy solidarity played it smart, he could win the life series. easily.

jimmy is good at making alliances with people (coughs and kicks the southlands betrayal underneath the rug Ignore That One he was Desperate he started off with two lives remember honestly it was a justified move) hes a litlte bit silly stupid and oft acts impulsively but he can direct that impulsivity against one person and for another. if he got himself in a squad like he did in 3rd and last life and stopped playing up the pathetic bit and set a trap for once in his life (/endeared) he could actually get himself some kills. some Real kills, not accidentally blowing up ren and skizz with tnt.

i dont even care how he does it. i just want him to win. and if he doesnt win, i want him to come top five at LEAST before getting horrifically stabbed in the back by someone he had been running with for the whole series that is the ONLY loss i will accept and still be happy about. the man deserves a girlboss moment please we're approaching two years let the man LIVE

[kroosluvr]

sorry i feel bad for ranting on """Main"" i guess though i kinda keep this more of apersonal blog than a very polished art blog thing. under the cut

things wld be easier if i was just an oc-centric artist (which i kinda am but only to myself in my head) but it Is how it is at this point (i want to draw my ocs more but they never turn out the way i want) and theres just so much i want to draw for the silly little media franchises that happen to capture my stupid little heart and etc.

ahhhhhhhhhhhh ifeel stupid for loving too much or whatever. i dont want to throw a pity party over this either because in the end its just "who cares LOVE WHAT U LOVE DRAW WHAT U WANT" right but in the moment i feel stupid and it sucks and i hate it actually!!!!!!! and i WILL in fact keep drawing hwat i want and what makes me happy but like idkidkdidkgkhw

sometimes i cant help thinking if i was a better artist.,, like more artistically skilled........ would people really say the things they do about the things i draw

^ (Authors note: no one has been mean about the stuff i draw just. side comments i guess lol. from my friends though and not random people . so its harder to just brush off i guess)

like maybe im just not good enough yet. which is fine. spite is actually a really good drawing proponent. but its also just like . when will it be enough to be worth it? will it be worth being my friend now if im a good artist? if i draw what you want? ...........................

its obviously not discounting the people who really enjoy my art style adn what i draw regardless (which im soooo so grateful for bc i never like expect anyone to stick around sicne my fixations change like the wind) but its like... these r the people i spend the most time with . and it sucks. i have to. second guess what i say and what i type and just. ok like i know its not that serious either but i hate it i really dont like it (<- im also just socially anxious if u cant tell)

and its also like i cant just extract myself from my friend group for a while to kinda cool off (read: muster the courage to be an idiot in front of them again) bc ummmmm um i dont have many friends . they are kind of all i got. (which is nice i like small circles(?) im not good at opening up to people.) and i do admire and like them very much but then i just feel like i get bit in the ass all the time (This past month) with shit like this i guess

and honestly like. well half the reason i keep switching fixations is BECAUSE of stuff like this where i feel self conscious of """"Being obsessed"""" over One thing so much so i just immediately switch tracks so fast but its just a cycle (Which i dont see as a bad thing tbh? it keeps my art moving and things fresh so like.)

And honestly i dont really try to . be too vocal about. fandom? stuff? when im with my friends? unless they bring it up first? i got burnt so many times with my vtuber interests so like lol ive Learned. but maybe it slips out too much? bruh. my bad i guess

i have to stop thinking abt this man.., why has this happened to me so many times this past month lol its kind of ridiculous

(Im sure they dont like. mean it. right? ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, if they actually meant it and want me to shut up then they should just actually say so right.,

i just want to draw . its not going to stop me from drawing but damn does it really like rain on my parade or put a dent in my fender or whatever other sayings that i cant think of right now

in the end i really REALLY appreciate frm the very very bottom of my heart everyone that even remotely likes/appreciates my art (especially the persona stuff nowadays bc thats what im mainly pouring all my mental and physical and emotional into) like i really really mean it. because this stuff like my silly comics and stuff is really stuff i make for purely my own heart and just what i want to see kinda. and so it just makes me feel really warm that people also want to see it and keep seeing it and love it and everything like that. and, with all this kind of negative stuff going on i just go back and reread tags and comments and stuff and i feel encouraged to keep going and draw more and everything like that. so like really, truly, thank you. i really never thought so many people would like the stuff i make. even if its not really artistically good, or really deeply interesting, im really happy it could be something special to people out there

[starlightval]

Hi! I wasn't sure if you took requests or prompt ideas or anything so please ignore this if you dont, but i absolutely freaking love your writing and was wondering if maybe you could so something on what loving Rooster is like or something soft like it?? can be as short or long as you like, i just need some more rooster fluff from the obvious queen of writing it 🥺💕

you. are. so. sweet 🥺 queen of writing fluff?? what an honor, i hope i can do this title justice <3 i haven't offically posted that i take requests or prompts but absolutely send them in because writers block can be such a pain! its super short more of a blurb than anything since im currently at work and wanted to get this out asap but i hope you love it angel

pairing: bradley 'rooster' bradshaw x reader

synopsis: loving rooster is so easy

warnings: n/a, just something super short and sweet

not edited!

masterlist

Loving Rooster was easy.

So, so unbelievably easy.

They said no one was perfect but if anyone were to come close it would be him. 

He was your safe place, your break from all of the worries in the world. Your best friend in every way of the word.

Everything you gave, he gave right back ten fold and he certainly wasn’t shy about loving you. Every chance he had, he openly expressed how much he loved you and appreciated you or showed you through little touches and actions. 

He didn’t care who was around to witness nor did he give a damn about what anyone thought. Not even when Hangman ultimately gave him shit about being whipped or acting like a girl in love, he simply brushed it off with a wave and said that Hangman was just jealous that nobody would put up with his ass. 

Sometimes you’d ask yourself if it was all good too good to be true. Burned too many times by guys of the past who played with your emotions making you feel stupid for wanting to cuddle up on them or even something simple like hold their hand in public.

But Rooster lived for things like that. He lived for your habit of kissing him every time you two parted even if it was just to go up the bar to grab another beer or how you always leaned into his side when you stood next to each other which prompted him to wrap his arm around your shoulder and the thousand watt smile you give him everytime you catch his eye? To. Fucking. Die. For.

Don’t even get him started on dancing with you, if he could do it forever he would. Everything from slow dancing and it feeling like you’re the only two people in the world to flailing around like idiots together nearly doubling over with laughter at the ridiculousness of the others move is his favorite.

And your affectionate nature works out well for him because this man can’t go two seconds without having his hands on you honestly and needs at the minimum three kisses a day from you to be able to function properly but thats a whole other thing. 

If you’re walking together your fingers are interlaced, never just holding because that’s not intimate enough 'I’m your boyfriend not your friend honey' or his hand is at the small of your back leading you through whatever crowd you may be in.

If you’re sitting next to one another and he can’t wrap his arm around your shoulders then you bet your ass his hand is at least on your thigh and he’s pulling your chair as close as he can to his. 

If he’s seated across from you? You guessed it, he’s going to try and play footsie under the table with you or at the very least have one of your legs pressed up against his.

And good god do not even think about leaving him when he’s sleeping. Man turns into a grumpy child and will one hundred percent drag himself out of bed to come find you, that is if you could even manage to break free of his bear grip in the first place. 

Bradley Bradshaw was truly a dream come true and you thanked whatever higher power had sent him into your life for him everyday.

[marcusagrippa]

Hey, what was inaccurate about Domina? I want to watch it but I’m unsure on the characterizations

(oh this got quite long, sorry in advance-)

it's not that it's *super* inaccurate, it's just that (in my opinion) some of the choices made were a little, well. they could have been more interesting. guy who only ever thinks about agrippa all the time voice i am going to talk about agrippa first. i do love how they did agrippa but i also feel like his character was sort of flattened? like we see him for the most part as either a violent warmonger or then flip it entirely to this (i'm going to be mean here, but i don't care) pretty pathetic man who just kind of rolls over and does whatever gaius and livia want, and there's not really much nuance - no mention of the whole quote unquote 'exile' situation in 23, or negotiations with herod or parthia or anything like that.

(this is very much a personal thing, but the [spoilers] sort-of-but-not-really romance plot with him and livia definitely irked me. i think they did it well for what it was, but - they did come close, but when are they going to make a show where him and octavian are as insane about one another as they were historically? the emphasis on his relationship with livia over octavian lessens the effect of his death - and the whole death thing really did piss me off. they show his death, they show his funeral, they focus on how sad LIVIA is in that funeral shot (and not his, you know, childhood best friend other half of my soul etc etc) and then immediately cut to a sex scene with livia and gaius. yay. i haven't seen beyond this episode, so correct me if im wrong, but it kind of feels like people just... forget about him immediately? even gaius. there's not really a mourning or grief sort of thing. it's weird.)

the show also often skips out on events that, in my opinion, could have been more interesting than inserting some kind of weird little random subplot in instead. like - without too many spoilers, they give livia this ex best friend who's now a vestal virgin who was also in love with her as a kid which could have been really interesting! and done really well! but it's. not. it glossed over characters who's stories i think are really intriguing - like octavia adopting and raising antony's children (cleopatra selene isn't in the show at all, which i think is pretty sad) could have been interesting to focus on, but instead after a point in season 1 they just kind of reduce her to her grief over marcellus.

i think the show has a little bit of a problem with girlbossifying livia, but to the point where it sort of comes full circle and goes right back to portraying her how people like tacitus might have portrayed her. despite all the reasoning and motivation the show gives her, it still comes across like she's picking off and poisoning octavian's possible heirs one by one (because, well, she literally is) to protect her and her family's power. i think the whole 'restoring the republic' thing COULD have been really interesting! but they don't really explore *how* they'd do that or anything, they just kind of... bring it up every time there needs to be some kind of dramatic secret scene and never expand on it. i understand the show is the livia show but i think the focus on her sometimes makes the other characters (eg gaius) seem stupid or idiotic when we KNOW they weren't historically.

i am not very knowledgeable about the historical julio-claudian 'kids' (for want of a better word), so i can't really speak on a lot of their portrayals, but the whole 'bad tiberius' thing irritated me. unsure of how grounded in history this is but they give him some slightly odd butchered form of doctor-jekyll-esque did where he has an evil fucked up version who comes out and kills people sometimes. i really really love the portrayal of tiberius for the most part in the show, but this bit... eh. he also wants to kill his mum and have sex with his mum, so that's a thing.

side note but it does feel a little weird that two of the main slave characters (antigone and tycho) are both Black, especially in a setting where slavery wasn't influenced by race.

not sure if this is coherent or what you were asking at all, but here are some slightly disconnected thoughts! but despite all of this i do genuinely enjoy the show, if nothing else i think it's very fun. thanks for the ask :]

[bonefall]

can we have some random trivia for HeatherHareBreeze? Im weirdly attached to that ship now tbh

Behold. The thems. A summary of the Hare/Heather/Breeze polycule.

Something overlooked about canon is that Breezepaw begged Crowfeather to let him say goodbye "to his friends" and was shot down

So I have interpreted this to mean that Breeze is actually a total ride or die little fella for his buddies

That was the reason why so many WindClan cats were in the Dark Forest. He was the RINGLEADER

By the way-- I am writing Breezepelt with BPD in mind. Him, Cinderheart, and Squirrelflight. He often sorts people into broad, unhealthy categories-- BAD or GOOD

But anyway I could talk about BB!Breezy-P all day

Bottom line is, these three were TIGHT. They're the three warrior apprentices of Lake WindClan in Po3 and were always getting in trouble together

Heatherpaw got them into digging holes. Normal stupid teenager shit "let's make the deepest hole ever"

Harepaw got buried OOPS. Get tunnel'd idiot

Brushblaze was nearby enough to hear someone scream and helped pull Hare out

After three sets of teary eyes BEGGED him to not tell Onestar, he made them promise to come get him when they were digging deep enough that they couldn't dig back up.

He's an ex-solver from BloodClan and can help them make sure they don't make an unstable hole

Bottom line is, the three of them go back a very long time, but I don't imagine it was even romantic back then. It was Heather And The Boys.

The Dark Forest drove a wedge between Heather and the boys, as she quickly realized that they may not have started with bad intentions, but cats like Mudclaw, Tigerstar, and Hawkfrost were BAD news and they were going to drag them all down too.

It wasn't worth it. Training with a REAL tunneler was the bait to lure her in like Tunnelbun crumbs for a hunted bird.

The wedge between Heather and the Boys became a wedge between the Boys when they all got their Dishonor Titles. Harespring --Darkseeker-- was working to atone. This meant disavowing his training, focusing on how he could help people, and seeking the things he could learn in his own Clan.

Breezepelt --Dodderheart--, took that badly. How dare Darkseeker start pretending like there was something to disavow! Onestar sucks! Crowfeather sucks! StarClan sucks! He'll do whatever it takes to get power and change things around here, get the respect he wants, but Breezepelt didn't learn his lesson at all

Darkseeker lost his Dishonor Title first, back to Harespring. Rottenheart decided he wasn't his friend anymore, just like Heathertail.

Dodderheart: "Everyone hates me except Furzepelt and Sunstrike! I'll bet they're all sitting around plotting against me right now!!"

Harespring: "aw this tunnelbun has a grumpy face like breezepelt lol"

Heather: "lol"

And so, as soon as he learned The Kin was looking for any cats who felt like the Clans had wronged them, misfits and rejects, he brought himself and his two supporters there. BIG mistake.

Mistake he spends the rest of his life regretting

Heather rightfully calls him on this when she ends up joining the Kin to learn more about her brother Darktail. "This is all garbage you put in your head! Crowfeather is a dick, and so is my dad, but you shoved me, and Hare, and even your stupid half siblings or whatever into some ridiculous narrative about how evil and hated you are! We LOVE you, can't you see that?!"

"YOU'RE the one who's blind! I killed Firestar, I tried to kill them, and only now with Darktail am I finally-"

"Being used AGAIN. He's using you. Just like Tigerstar when he wanted to get rid of Firestar."

"...thats not true you're l-lying"

"You're always being used, Breezepelt."

"No I'm not! Darktail's my friend and my leader! He sees the value in me, he says I'm going to do a lot for him, and without me the Kin wouldn't..."

Heather stares, unimpressed, before shrugging, "I'll still be here when you realize it. Will he?"

In the big breakout, Harespring is there to secure a tunnel for them all to escape with

I think it makes a good idea that it was a backup plan Heather had all along, and Hare was entrusted with making sure it was done by this day. Just in case Darktail turned out to be the lunatic they expected him to be

Brushblaze is going to go out here, too, collapsing the tunnel so they can't be followed. It's a really good end for him.

When Breezepelt comes back to WindClan, it is on their grace. Hare and Heather are both vouching on their honor that they will he responsible for his actions.

I imagine Harespring looked Onestar in the eyes when he did this. FULLY expecting to have to defend himself for working on a secret tunnel, losing Brushblaze, possibly losing his deputyship for LITERALLY undermining

But... Heathertail was saved. Breezepelt looks bedraggled and humbled, unlike what happened just about a year ago. Brushblaze made the ultimate sacrifice. Now is not the time to discuss this.

AVOS is just about to hit its climax; where Onestar steals Breezepelt's plan to drown killing Darktail.

But anyway, enough of the plot of Better Bones AVOS. Fluffy trivia time

Harestar eats his tunnelbuns like a beast. He bites clean through them, Heather and Breeze are always screaming about this

Harespring's personality is very mild, level headed, and thoughtful. He moves slowly when he's not in a hurry.

He can be pushed around under stress though. He doesn't like being under pressure for that reason, and tries to minimize situations where he's put on the spot.

In Clanmew his name is "Hare Will-Jump Up", it's a hare that thinks before it leaps.

Breezepelt appreciates how Harespring will reword things for him, when they work on communication together.

If Hare worded something in a way that set Breeze off, Breeze can just ask what he meant and Hare will say it a different way

When Harespring becomes Harestar, I like to think there are cats in the Clan who feel like Breeze is only here because of his wife and husband. And maybe he is, what're you gonna do about it? Cry?

Heather has an honest, curious personality. She likes to be respected for her intelligence and insight, being a smart person is something she values about herself.

She is not easily tricked and can be cutting if she smells bullshit. She will be rude if she thinks you're lying to her.

"Did you eat, Breep?" "Ye-" "no you fucking didn't go get food"

I don't see her as "nurturing" like others think, she's a militant carer and outgoing about what she believes to be the right thing

She's definitely the head of one of the patrols, probably Construction.

When kits come through in TBC, Breeze is the primary parent. Villain to mom pipeline

He doesn't hold a high rank in WindClan because he spent the majority of his life Being Breezepelt, and is accepting that he probably never will

And that's okay because he's currently the loyal Kitchen Head of MeadowClan and the kits have just gotten back from the harrowing death of Honeysucklestar but it's lunchtime

"Honeysucklestar too, being a corpse doesn't make you stop being hungry. Come on, up up up" Woodkit jumps up from her deathbed

Turns out he's better at caring for others than he is at caring for himself

He doesn't feel like he deserves this. Like love and happiness isn't something he should have, after everything he did and the people who are not here because of him

Yet, he persists. He's still here and, somehow, people think he's worth saving.

And maybe that's what matters. Making life better from this point forward, for everyone. In the ways he can.

[welcome-to-my-bullshitery]

Things that i've noticed that no one ever talks about in LoTR

This is a huge post by the way so im putting it under a cut

you have been warned

TFotR - Book 1

'A day or two later a rumor (probably started by the knowledgeable SAM) YES. SAMWISE GAMGEE. OUR LITTLE CINNAMON ROLL STARTED A RUMOR. idk it's so funny to me

The entire paragraph about hobbits and gift giving is too ADORABLE.

Bilbo put INSTRUMENTS in PARTY CRACKERS. AND LIKE NEW ONES.

Bilbo calling Gandalf 'an interfering old busybody'

Bilbo: "You'll keep an eye on Frodo, won't you?" Gandalf: "Two eyes as often as I can spare them."

All the gifts Bilbo gave out and they all had meaning AND ITS ADORABLE

Lobelia, to Frodo: "...you're no Baggins - you - you're a Brandybuck!" Frodo: "Did you hear that Merry? That was an insult if you like." Meriadoc (Merry) BRANDYBUCK: "It was a compliment, and so, of course, not true."

Gandalf, shoving his head through Frodo's WINDOW: "If you don't let me in, Frodo, I SHALL BLOW YOUR DOOR RIGHT DOWN YOUR HOLE AND OUT THROUGH THE HILL."

That one Hobbit who had seen Ents IN CHAPTER TWO. HAL. HAL SAW ENTS AND IT WAS MENTIONED IN CHAPTER TWO. TWO.

"Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them?" GANDALF. WHAT THE FUCK.

Sam, freaking tf out about just being caught 'dropping eaves' by Gandalf: "DON'T LET HIM HURT ME MR. FRODO!" Frodo, hardly able to keep from laughing: "He won't hurt you."

Sam being all excited about being able to go on the adventure and then he just. bursts into tears. like.

Gildor (AN ELF) calling Frodo ELF FRIEND. ITS TOO CUTE.

Frodo, in elvish: Thanks for the food :). The Elves: HERE IS A JEWEL AMONG HOBBITS

Pippin just flat out saying he didn't want to leave Frodo any food but Sam insisted.

Frodo, about who's taking a bath first: "Eldest or Quickest first? You'll be last either way PIPPIN." GEE

Pippin, talking about Sam: He would jump down a dragons throat to save you, if he did not trip over his own feet." GEE

The ridiculous bath song. And it's Bilbos favorite. Of course it's ridiculous if it was Bilbos favorite.

Gandalf, writing in a letter to Frodo: If he forgets, I shall roast him. Frodo, four seconds later: He deserves roasting.

Sam getting mad at Ferny or someone and throwing an apple at him. AND AFTER IT KNOCKS THE IDIOT FERNY SQUARE IN THE FACE AND HE FALLS DOWN CURSING SAM JUST GOES "Waste of a good apple." AND KEEPS WALKING.

Sam, an intellectual: "What do they live on when they can't get hobbit?" AND REFUSED TO CALL THEM THEIR ACTUAL NAME AND JUST CALLS THEM 'NEEKERBREEKERS' BECAUSE ITS THE SOUND THEY MAKE

They found the trolls from The Hobbit. About the middle of Chapter 12, Flight to the Ford. The whole group thought they were real until they saw they were actually stone.

Frodo, after discovering more about Sam: "He'll end up by becoming a wizard - or a warrior!" Sam: "I don't want to be neither." OF COURSE YOU DON'T YOU JUST WANNA LIVE IN THE SHIRE AND GARDEN ALL YOUR LIFE. OH SAM.

TFotR - Book 2

At the very beginning of chapter 1 - PF COURSE SAM WAS ALWAYS THERE AND OF COURSE HE HAD TO BE TOLD TO GO AWAY AND REST. YOU ADORABLE LITTLE SHIT.

Frodo calling the Big People 'Big and rather stupid' Accurate though.

Sam holding Frodo's hand and then blushing and thEN JUST SAYS 'It's warm! Meaning your hand, Mr. Frodo. It has felt so cold through the long nights!" SAM YOU GAY LITTLE SHIT I LOVE YOU.

Aragorn: Gollum is safely kept by the Elves of Mirkwood. Legolas: *sweats*

Elrond, to Sam: "It is hardly possible to separate you from him (Frodo) even when he is summoned to a secret council and you are not!" Sam, blushing (ITS SAYS IT IN THE BOOK THE LAST SENTENCES OF COUNCIL OF ELROND): "A nice pickle we have ourselves in, Mr. Frodo!" Me: Does Samwise is gay? Does SamwISE IS GAY??

Pippin, hasn't even done anything remotely wrong yet: "There must be someone with intelligence in this party!" Gandalf: "Then you most certainly won't be chosen, Peregrin Took!" Pippin: D:

Gimli: "His (Sauruman's) arm has grown long indeed if he can draw snow down from the north to trouble us here three hundred leagues away." Gandalf, channeling his inner sassy bitch(bilbo): "His arm has grown long."

>TBC im not even close to being done yet< ^^

[hargreevesd]

an eternity without me

Summary: y/n, a she-elf who lived on her own, was sent by Saruman to join the Fellowship and learn everything she could so he could win them. Y/n was neutral on the war because after the death of her parents she promised not to help in any war ever. Instead of being completely loyal to Saruman she helps Gandalf to revenge him. She is tired of being the puppet and wants a small adventure, but she ends up feeling something for an elf prince. Little did she know the prince would test her loyalty but he ended up catching feelings too.

Based on the Masquerade episode of Dangerously Yours.

I had forgotten how beautiful Rivendell was because I had so many years to visit it. Well since my family was killed actually. I now know how to live on my own, at least I think so... Im here for a mission, yet I only want the adventure, to make friends, live this life of mine. But I guess I can not try those, what was I even made for?

Suddenly I hear something not really far away

The senses of mine tell me it must be an elf and I know exactly which one. So what if I play a little?

I grab the closest book I find and I try to ran as close to him as I could, when we finally met face to face.

"That's it, get your book back I do not want it, you thought I was an idiot before?! "

"Wait, I do not know you, who-" I didn't let him finish and I quickly ran on my chamber. I did not remember the young prince like that... My memory stops from the day my family died and I can't remember if I saw him again or not since then, but I would say he is quite charming. As I'm ready to go to bed and wait for tomorrow to come, I hear a knock on my door.

"Sorry, I think you gave this to the wrong person, I do not know you and I did not give you this book!"

"Oh, I know Legolas"

"Wait you know me?"

"Well, of course, you are the prettiest elf here, and I was pretty lonely so I thought tonight I'm going to have an adventure!"

"Uhm, thank you Lady... "

"Y/n!"

"Y/n... How did you know I would not ran away with your book? "

"I took the chance, it is not mine anyway! Are you angry?"

"Hahaha, no I am not angry, I can only be grateful!"

We were now the Fellowship of the ring. Even though it was not my intention in first, I feel I belong here. We lost Gandalf though... Gandalf knew everything about me, my plans and my family. We had a small idea of how I could escape Saruman. Turns up I'm destined to destroy this team. We next went to Lothlórien. We spend many nights there, I could not count. But one of them stayed in my mind...

"Look y/n, a shooting star! Did you wish?"

"Oh I did not have time..."

"I know there is something you wish for!"

"Yes..."

"What did you wish for?"

"I was wishing we were two other people, people who did not have to say goodbye..."

"We do not have to, you know."

"Maybe..."

And then we wasted the whole night searching for other shooting stars, as all the others were sleeping. But deep in my mind I knew I started to love him and that would be catastrophic. The wish that I did earlier was absolutely true. I know one day I will say goodbye to him, but I do not want to. I want to spend my eternity with him, just us two. But this is only a stupid dream. I know it will never happen, maybe in another life time.

Time passed and we lost Boromir. Frodo and Sam went alone on Mordor, Merry and Pippin got kidnapped by orcs, thankfully they were saved. Now it's just me Legolas, Aragorn, Gimli and Gandalf. He was alive and well. I still had my hopes for our small plan since Saruman never reached for me. When the moon was shining and I was reading a book outside of the castle of Rohan, in a wood, I received an eagle with a letter. Saruman. The plan has changed as it seems, but I could not do that. I just couldn't. I-

And then Legolas found me, like he always do.

"Hey y/n!"

"Hey Legolas..."

"Is there something wrong? You seem skeptical. Why are you all alone here?"

"No, well yes, you see I just wanted some clear air and..."

"What is it?"

"I'm just stressed you know after everything..."

"Well do you want me to make your mood?"

"It's okay Legolas, I will get over it, you can go inside."

"But I want to say something to you, something I have been holding a long time now..."

"Look I can not right now-"

"Y/n I offer you the three things most dear to me, my heart, my homeland and my dream.."

"You are too generous!"

"Y/n you must listen to me, since the very first moment we met I've been completely yours!"

"Please, say no more, there are wars between us, wars that can't be stopped by words."

"You said one night you wished we were two different people, i think you may have that wish y/n."

"What do you mean?"

"When we will be close to victory, they won't need my service any longer..."

"Close to victory?"

"Im going to tell you something tonight y/n...something that will put my life in your hands."

"Then don't tell me, how do you know you can trust me this much..."

"I love you and I believe you love me!"

"You are quite wrong, this has been only and adventure to me."

*This is not true y/n."

"It is true. You smiled at me and I was flattered, it was an adventure for me to feel better."

"You may as well take my heart y/n it's already full of you! You walked in it, the day we met."

"You are a fool Legolas!"

"Isn't anyone who falls in love? You know what you are to me? A reason to believe again, an elf that exists for me, a fine and honest elf."

"Oh my god you are such a child Legolas, take your dream and please go..."

"What is it, what's wrong my dear?"

"You know nothing about me! You know me only 6 months!"

"6 months? Y/n I've known you all my life!"

"All your life?"

"It's true! I've read about you on a thousand stories about one of the most powerful she-elves out there, the old friend of mine... When I've heard beautiful lyrics I thought she would like that, I've talked to flowers about how stunning you are..."

"Oh stop! You must listen to me, I'm not that elf, at least not anymore, I might once was, but not now. You see you were wrong... You can not trust me."

"Are you telling me a person's name that I can't say but we both know send you?"

"What are you saying?"

"You see I have known all along, we talked about you since the first day of the trip."

"And it... It did not make any difference?"

"It did not make any difference. You see I trust you. You came here to betray me, and to betray our country. That is your mission. And yet I'm so sure about your love, that I will trust you with my life and what is far more valuable, Middle Earth."

"I will betray you Legolas, you can still go..."

"If you do, you betray yourself at the same time."

"Yes... Yes I know."

"Then you should know my secret. As we are talking, Isengard is falling and in the end the man who send you will lose. If you stay with us just one more night, tomorrow we will all together destroy him."

"Destroy him?"

"He made many mistakes, he betrayed us. But the greatest of all was sending you here, y/n."

"Why?"

"He guessed I would loved you, but he did not guess you would fall in love with me."

"No... He did not. If I betray you, I betray myself. If a betray him, I betray my safety and my new home. All I want is a new home and peace and that is very dear to me."

"I can give you a new home y/n, so is that dearer that I?"

"No... Not dearer than you."

"Then, would you help us defeat him?"

"Help you? De- defeat him?"

"By telling me his plans! That's the only way we can get him, we will both win and what you seek y/n will be yours!"

"I see..."

"Then you will help me!"

"By giving you any information I may possess of his plans?"

"Yes."

And with that yes, something changed. I felt so betrayed. He made me think I loved him just so he could only get the information he wanted.

"Ah.... You are very clever are you not? Oh I can read you like a book now. You thought I was easily wayed, that you could make me love you, that I will throw up the only chance I have to build a home, for you?"

"That is not the way to look at it y/n!"

"You were not so wise after all... Because you have lost, you hear me? Lost. You guessed wrong, you forgot how hard it is to love as an elf."

"You do not know what you are saying y/n!"

"You never loved me! You knew that I loved you and you used that!"

"Y/n stop talking like a child. Are we playing over wars now?"

"Yes! We are, aren't we? I have my bow Legolas. I advise you to be careful of what you say."

"Well, rather melodramatic are you not? Do you mind if I write down some things?"

"Write down...?"

"I always do that when things get difficult. It helps you understand the situation."

"You can do everything you please Legolas, you have a little time anyway."

"You mean you actually going to kill me?"

"I mean just that!"

"Well go ahead!"

"I do this my own way. Look, you already know my purpose of being here, tell me where Frodo is."

What that was not planned, I did not say that, I could never, this is not me, how do I stop that I can not help it.

"I will not because I simply do not know. You can not kill me, you can not, because you love me. It takes a very brave and a very cold elf to do that y/n, I do not think you can, is it not true? Is this not why you are waiting?"

"It's not true."

"You want my heart, striked with agony! My hands to shake, you want me to please for my life so you can make a generous move to spare me. Sorry y/n I do not think I'm in the mood for prayers tonight."

"You do not think I will do it? That is why you are so brave, you would not be otherwise. You lied to me, you deceived me."

"You tried to deceive me."

"I'm tired of listening to you!"

Saruman has taken over me and I can't do anything. How can I stop this madness...

"You gave me your heart y/n. You would like me to hand it back, whole again, but I will not. You will live a long time y/n, an eternity without me, you will look into the faces of passers by hoping for something that will, for an instant, bring me back to you. You will find moonlight nights strangely empty because, when you call my name through them, there will be no answer. Always your heart will be aching for me and your mind will give you the doubtful constellation that you did...a brave thing."

"You dare to talk of bravery."

"What else do we have to talk about y/n? For me there will never be another elf, but you. But to my heart there is another love that must come before you. Middle Earth. You are so still... Your face is like ice? What are you thinking y/n?"

"What can anything of what you are saying matter? You betrayed me with words. If I fail now, I deserve to die." I truly want to die now, I can not control what I am saying. "You tricked me into loving you." I keep saying things I don't want to. I truly love you Legolas. Please stop this madness.

"Did you forget that you came here for the same thing?"

"I could not betray you. I tried to tell you and you said you already knew. I was as honest as I could."

"You think I wanted to love you? Knowing where you came from and what your mission was? Do you not suppose that every hour we were together I was thinking "she is just pretending"?"

"I was not! I loved you."

"And I loved you so much I let you pretend! Because you brought something to my days, I could not stand the thought of loosing... Listen to your heart y/n... Feel it pounding."

"Your time is up!"

"Then my last words? I love you y/n."

"Are you determined to die with a lie on your lips?"

And the bow sang. I did not mean too, I did not do it, I swear I was controlling it...until I did not.

"I- love you y/n. Since we were little kids... Do you remember it? In my homeland's trees that we were dancing and dancing..."

I came to my senses, Saruman won. Why did I let that happen. I felt a hole on my heart, like you grabbed it and picked it out. There was no heart there anymore, I could not feel anything.

The bow fell to my feet and I also fell to my knees. We was trying to breath but the arrow on his chest did not let him. You know, elves are not meant to die, so when one is about to, it's shocking for everyone including him. I could not do anything. I could not move, speak, do something at all. The one and only love I had has just died, by my hands. It's all my fault. I said yes to that stupid wizard so I could have an adventure. I helped Gandalf so I could have finally, a family. But I screwed up. I lost a new family I could have and the love of my life. I do not deserve to live. I do not deserve anything at all. Maybe that is my purpose. Why was I made for. To die all along.

He looked cold, I ran and hugged him.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, Legolas, please, come back to me. It wasn't me, I could never do that to you. How I'm I suppose to live an eternity without you? I can not. I surely can not. I wanted it to be with you, spend our immortal lives together, be forever! Of course I remember that day at your homeland..." Suddenly my tears started to ricochet. "We were both like 50?. I also remember your first words to me. What happens if we die?" Why would you even say that you were too young, too immature. An immortal elf. I just wanted to look at moonlight nights together, call your name to the stars and say you were mine. Tell me why your hands are now cold...I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry I-"

I stopped talking because I couldn't speak anymore. All I could do was sob.

"I've killed so many soldiers, orcs, trolls yet I could never thought I would kill the love of my foolish life."

I felt every cell on my body suddenly turn off. Like it was not there. They say elves can die from pain and grief. This is what I deserve. I want to go and meet him. My home, my love, my soul. My everything.

Y/n died hugging the person she loved but killed moments before. The rest of the Fellowship could not handle the loss of the most powerful and yet cheerful members they had. They mourned them forever, as the right lovers of wrong time and place. Now they will get their eternity together, with no wars to keep them apart.

[sharkchan12]

Sitcom au fanfic were Eyes, Moloch, Dexter, and Bob go do crazy stuff together

Fanfic Eyes, Moloch, Dexter, and Bob go to Walmart

Sitcom au

*intro plays with iconic music*

*it starts*

Eyes hasn't been fed yet so he's crying like a baby and it's starting to annoy everyone

Bob: We ran out of human sacrifices to feed

Dexter: "One isn't enough for him we need like at least 100 to keep him full"

Dexter said while covering his ears over the crying of Eyes

Moloch: "Well where the hell do we go to find that many people"

Bob: "I might know a place that has a lot of people in it"

Dexter and Moloch turn their heads towards Bob

Bob: "LETS GO TO WALMART, it has a lot of people, especially because it's a Sunday"

Moloch: "That's a stupid idea, everyone will run away from Eyes immediately after seeing him"

Bob: "Not if we give him a disguise"

Bob then proceeds to pull out baby clothes

Bob: "A cute baby will attract more people and therefore, more sacrifices"

Moloch: "I need a disguise too I can't just stay here all day"

Bob: "Don't worry I got you covered"

Bob then proceeds to pull out a pair of sunglasses and a Miley Cyrus T-shirt

Dexter: "Is that my shirt?"

*a laugh track plays*

Bob: "I'm not comfortable giving him my clothes so this is best I got"

Dexter: "Don't give that idiot my shirt, it wouldn't even fit him"

Moloch: "He does got a point though"

Bob: "Do you want to come with us or not?"

Moloch: "Fine fine"

Moloch puts on the Miley Cyrus T-shirt and sunglasses knowing it'll annoy Dexter for the rest of the day

Eyes starts to get excited over the thought of getting to eat more sacrifices

They all get in the car while Bob drives them to Walmart

Bob: "We're here!"

Dexter: "I'm not really comfortable doing the whole killing people thing so can I just stay in the car while you guys do your thing?"

Bob: "Well we're already here and we need more help with this so it's either that or we sacrifice you"

Dexter looked disappointed in that answer

*laugh track plays*

Dexter: "Sure, whatever"

The group gets into Walmart and Eyes is in a stroller. Once they get into the entrance they put Eyes in the cart

Bob: "I need to get some things, Dexter you take care of Eyes while I'm gone"

Dexter: "WHAT?! BUT YOU DIDN'T SAY-"

Before Dexter can complain as always Bob is gone and he is stuck with both Eyes and Moloch

Moloch isn't tall enough to be holding the cart :(

While they were walking three troubling kids noticed Moloch with his stupid ass Miley Cyrus T-shirt and decided to be little shits about it (well only one of them to be exact)

Roy: "OOOOOOOO LOOK WHAT WE HAVE HERE"

Ross: "Roy we're not doing this shit again"

Roy: "BUT LOOK WHAT HE'S WEARING"

Robert: "Come on man he looks old and he has no legs leave him alone"

Moloch started to take offense and tried to call for Eyes but Dexter left with Eyes already so boo hoo

Moloch thought "Fine I'll do this myself"

Before he can do anything he felt something behind him IT WAS ROY'S MOTHER

*crowd gasping sound effect plays*

Carmen: "REYNOLD WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO STRANGERS AGAIN"

Before anything serious happens we cut off to Dexter taking care of Eyes

Dexter was searching for random strangers until he heard

"I didn't know you had a kid" a familiar voice

It was Lila with her son Skid

Dexter: "OH UH HI MA'AM I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WOULD UH-"

Skid looks at Eyes and remembers the time he and Pump hung out with him

Skid- "I REMEMBER PLAYING WITH HIM HE'S MY FRIEND"

Lila: "Oh really, that's the kid you were talking about?"

Dexter was confused how this little boy can hang out with a creature like Eyes without being eaten

Eyes: "OH RIGHT I REMEMBER YOU, YOU'RE ONE OF THOSE LITTLE PILES OF FLESH"

Eyes said in his deep demonic voice

Lila was confused and concerned

Lila: "Oh wow…your son's voice is very… different…"

Lila said without trying to sound rude

Dexter: "OH HE'S NOT MINE IM JUST ummmm…BABYSITTING YEAH YEAH BABYSITTING"

*laugh track plays*

Dexter is very 50/50 if he should sacrifice Lila or not, he doesn't want to kill humans but he also needs to feed Eyes

So Dexter tries to make this conversation quick and just ends up looking like an awkward loser doing it

Lila: "Maybe you can try babysitting my son one day"

Dexter: "Well I am a very busy person so I don't think I can do that ma'am"

Lila: "Oh well it was nice talking to you Dexter"

Skid also said bye to his bestie as both Lila and Skid left. Dexter never felt more embarrassed until he heard crying from someone familiar…IS BOB CRYING?????

Bob is in front of the meat section, on his knees crying because of the animals that were killed for meat. There was also a bunch of candy wrappers all over the floor

Bob: "THESE POOR ANIMALS, THEY DON'T DESERVE THIS KIND OF TREATMENT"

Dexter: "YOU'RE NOT FUCKING SERIOUS"

Dexter said out loud in anger

Dexter: "YOU'VE BEEN SITTING HERE CRYING OVER MEAT INSTEAD OF HELPING"

Bob: "I would not stand for animal cruelty, you would never understand you Exterminator"

Dexter: "Animals don't have feelings unlike the humans you eat"

Bob: "HAVE YOU EVEN FED EYES YET"

Eyes started to get angry he hasn't been fed any sacrifices yet and started to also get mad at Dexter

Dexter: "FINE IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE IT, YOU TAKE HIM I COULDN'T HANDLE IT ANYWAY"

Before Dexter can leave there was a crowd of strangers around them hearing the argument he just had. Everyone started to judge Dexter while he walked away and went around Bob and his "child" to comfort them

Bob knew what to do and started to fake cry to in hopes maybe get more sympathy from more people

Bob: "That yellow suited son of a bitch was always so rude to me and our child, did you know that 37% of marriages end in divorce in the U.S"

Before things could get violent let's cut back to Moloch

Carmen was getting angry at Roy for wondering around again

Carmen: "Why are you even talking to this…thing anyway?"

Moloch now even more offended: "A THING?"

Carmen: "I mean you sure do look like one but I can't put my finger on it, but whatever"

Moloch then proceeds to smack her in the face with his big ass hands (he could've just killed her but whatever)

One of the hatzgang members then pulls out his phone to record this (to post this on vine or YouTube or whatever was popular in 2013)

Carmen didn't want to deal with this anymore

Carmen: "REYNOLD, WE'RE GOING HOME, AND I DON'T WANT YOU TALKING TO ANYMORE PEOPLE LIKE HIM AGAIN"

Before they walked away they heard a bunch of people screaming, Eyes finally got his meal

We then cut to the Walmart being destroyed and all non spooky month characters being killed

Eyes, Moloch, Dexter, and Bob are back in the car

Eyes: "Well that just happened"

*laugh track plays*

Bob: "How about we reward ourselves with some ice cream, EXCEPT DEXTER!"

Dexter: "I WAS GOING TO PAY FOR MY OWN ICE CREAM ANYWAY"

They drove to the ice cream store, got their Ice cream

They all sat down together laughing along (except Dexter) as the credits roll

*iconic outro music plays*

The End

[munamania]

bitch post time!!!!!! many revelations ok last night's vibes were HEINOUS but it provided so much for me and lydia to talk about and now i am gonna share with you yippee storytime

k so we plan to go to this valentines day showcase thing that the college radio is putting on last night. mind you at my place of work where i pretended that i had a family emergency and had to go home cause i didnt feel like going into work yesterday morning lol idiot... i was so paranoid my boss was there in disguise or some shit it was stupid. sorry um. yeah so ok i was largely like this could be a chance for friend groups to come together and maybe ill be able to talk to sams roommate and also like i do want to see more live music and it's free! so. anyway ok wait let me tell u abt the first part of the day

so me and lydia drive over some wine bottles to sam for him to use as props in a film. and sam and the roommate are sitting on their porch and we chat a little bit acc sam said as i walked up 'you always look so suspicious' and i was like 'ok u guys were literally just staring at me' cause they WERE and roommate was actually really nicely like 'oh no you're okay' and generally was just kind of inserting into our convo which well i had fun with naturally. um anyway and then who comes running up but teko! our buddy teko. and sams like have yall met and im like Of course and teko gives me a hug and i cant lie it was actually so sweet. i am also extremely touch starved but it was a nice hug. anyway. then i had to help roommate pick shoes alongside teko's fit and then i was like um Ok Bye. when i got back in the car lydia was like so i saw a neon sweatshirt... and i was like yeah <3 that's my man <3 sorry ok vibes get worse as the night comes

me and lydia end up getting to sam's late to 'pregame' this show and ig it was supposed be like. it was encouraged to dress formally. and i was wearing a dress that was too small and my chappell red tights and docs. kind of a serve but me and lydia were serving much more valentines day than formal. anyway. roommate does swing around to be like hi! and THEN i see my girl chloe i looooove her shes so fuckin funny and weird and we made this weird little short together in class last semester and i was kinda intimidated by her so i was so happy shocked when she was like I was so excited to see u :D WEEE shes so cool guys and has the funniest fuckin laugh and well honestly the high points of the night were us and lydia fucking around and dancing and being weird and offputting wallflowers cause again this thing SUCKED. ok

we did also smoke beforehand and i accidentally took this huge hit and then thought id be fine w a little more but brother was i feeling funny. did not eat enough and didnt take water it was atrocious. so. we get there and let me tell you if I WAS WORKING i'd have been able to fix the fact that it was soooooooooo fucking loud in there like bad bad bad audio distortion etc i wanted to kick this dude off the mixer but like what ever... it hurt so bad. and the lights were mostly on until chloe and sam duped this guy into dimming some of them but even still it was giving middle school dance. without the fun cheesy music. some of my instagram gay people are there. um but sorry there was simply no way i was going near that dance floor like the bands lowkey highkey sucked (i mean it was just a bunch of white college dudes and they did not slay. shocker. sam kept being like 'they're so good' and we were like um haha... straight face emoji)

we acc disappeared for a while to another floor for the br and just chilled for like half an hour (and security came to find us lmfaooo but ended up just leaving) and i was feeling odd and out of body and too aware of how i looked and it was just not great i was like we're the only bitches serving cunt here... um. anywho. so like later theres a slow dance and roommate is dancing with this other girl i only know from instagram till this point and i suppose if i was really feeling myself i could have tried to make a move but i was not. once again. vile vibes in this place. like i dont mean to be a pussy i typically would be much more charming and fun if i wanted to flirt and kinda felt the vibe from them but i was not really enjoying myself LMAO

then some more of the friend group shows up at the end and sam's like 'drama is actively going down' and im like Wuhhhh the fuck and i feel like a few of them r looking at me and i was just like get me OUT of here but for some fuck ass reason was still like nooooo we should go over and have pizza w sam and them. forgive me for thinking they had like frozen pizza or smth and i could get some free food out of this no we had to sit there and wait for dominos or whatever

AND THE MOST ANNOOOOOOOOOOOYING AWFUL TERRIBLE GROSS MEN YOUVE EVER MET SAT THERE AND JOINED THE BRIEF SMOKE CIRCLE AND THEN WERE JUST THERE AND LIKE YOU COULD JUST FEEL THEM TAKING UP SPACE AND US 'GIRLS' WERE MADE TO FEEL SO SMALL ON THE FUCKING COUCH I WAS SOOOOOOOO TIRED. had to get a sweater cause i felt so uncomfortable. girl i really was only there in case i could have a saving grace moment with roommate im so serious. well and for chloe but otherwise me and lydia shoulda been outta there

literally chloe was so excited to show our little video to people and sam cut us off from getting there to show us the fucking fidget spinner game he has on his tv. girl get out! oh my fucking god. finally lydias like Cool anyway so - like sams misogyny jumped out in previously unprecedented ways. it was bad. these boys were truly making me want to kill myself im sorry like it was so bad i have curated my experience so as to be away from that for so long it was really jarring. and what you need to understand about sam is that he's almost died twice and kind of has a funny little gender vibe going on and so for a while now yeah we've gotten along through silly odd things we relate through but holy shit....... that was so offputting i cant even wrap my brain around it

also sam very much walked me into like yaoi-fying him and his best friend and then was like haha noooo why r u calling us gay ur so weird bitch just fuck him already im tired and also dont care.. hes so attention seeking and not used to um not being the center of attention. sorry! oopsies anyway so

so then im like ew like i kinda need to reassess um. the people im around. and again cant stress enough how gross and judged and just kinda old i felt surrounded by these ppl even tho theyre all like within a year of age? and like roommate still seems maybe cool but since we didnt actually talk and they were off w the other roommate/other ppl i cant help but associate them w the odd vibes but like. honestly idk i might just try to uh slide into their dms rlly casually. bc. well idk how the friend group is fracturing and it wouldnt surprise me if they were annoyed with sam esp living with him but obv i dont really know. but again let me stress this friend group has been friends since their freshman year like what r yall doing yeah u do need to break up....

so i figure since they're hot (and kinda tiny i cant tell if they're shorter than me or just right around my height) (but also they kind of scared me by giving Instagram face while posing for a pic last night i cant do any more people giving off dorian gray rn. but i was also under the influence so um that didnt help) i could just yeah be brave see how it goes and worst case scenario it's not a vibe yk. and best case scenario i get to hang w them and teko. teko so gives francis. anyway

OH also sam and the friends insisted on listening to this ai generated… thing like idk guys i think i was in hell fr

also had several men yell out of their cars at me and staring at me as we walked to the bus stop :/ so men really do ruin everything btw

um. so. that was the night! thx for reading if u did. i am excited to be around other fun silly cool queer people god bless fuck these people

[disasterbijamietartt]

It hurts my heart how excited and happy Jamie was to go for a beer with Roy and whennRoy said how proud he was of him. I'm preferring to ignore the following part, but it did make me happy them realising they were being stupid and going for a kebab so Im hoping that was just a stupid lapse of sense. Although it is making me side eye Roy especially for behaving that way knowing Jamie's past.

Ugh, yes, the latter half of the bar talk really didn't sit right with me.

It started out so great, but then it made a u-turn …

You know, I understand why they brought up the love triangle with Roy and Jamie, since their feelings for Keeley was something that was still standing between the and that they needed to talk about, but I didn’t like the execution of them getting needlessly sexist about it (bringing up the sex tape, really? And Roy’s whole “stay away from her, we are talking again so she is clearly mine — although, women, who understands them?”).

I could even accept the fist fight as some sort of necessary catharsis for them, if it wouldn’t be for Jamie’s history with abuse and him just two minutes earlier saying how Roy gave him something positive he didn’t get from the other older men in his life. (I’ll assume Simon wasn’t that much into football, so he wasn’t as motivational and didn’t train with him etc., otherwise just … ouch.) And the thing is also, all of Roy’s jealousy aside … they never actually fought over Keeley, which was the part I found so refreshing about the way the love triangle was handled. But, yeah, I can see how there was some lingering animosity that had to get settled before they truly could be best friends. But they could done that without actually fist fighting …

The whole asking Keeley to choose thing was … quite arrogant of them and icky, but good for them to realise they were being idiots and that it apparently didn't mess with their friendship.

Still, I would have preferred if they hadn't come to the conclusion, that Keeley should chose (with her choice being neither for good reason), but that they had used this opportunity to talk with her about their feelings for her and that they needed to know where they were standing with her to find closure. And then them having an actual conversation adressing their conundrum and how it would be best for all of them to stay friends, yadda yadda.

Like, the thing that annoys me most is, that we didn’t get a follow up, no apology to Keeley for acting so stupid. She kicked them out, which was the right thing to do, but I'd wished they had actually talked things out.

It is nice to have it so open that you can interpret it whichever way you want, but after seeing the trio's blooming friendship last episode this felt like such a step back in their relationship. I just would have loved to get a little bit more resolution, to have them properly established as friends.

Especially if you read the montage as something only happening in Ted’s dream—like, that is the only way I can excuse Beard’s and Jane’s wedding (with Ted not being present on top?) and Jamie visiting James and laughing with him. (I saw so many people on reddit being moved to tears by Jamie reconciling with his “dad”, like, yeah, applause for years of abuse and trauma being ignored in order to get a sappy ending. Like, if the show had at least acknowledged the abuse and shown James taking accountability, BEFORE Jamie decides to reconnect, but yeah, no one has to ever be accountable to Jamie, soo … And it is especially upsetting considering they added sexual abuse to the long list of James’ crimes just to … completely drop this, as if it didn’t matter. They could have made Jamie’s first trip to Amsterdam traumatic in other ways, if the contrast between bad trip with dad and good trip with mum was all they wanted to accomplish …)

On a side note: Jamie enjoying and missing drinking beer threw me off, since he never seemed to be too fond of alcohol, but they probably wanted to get the Darsteiner callback in. Way more important than consistent characterisation.

[skeletood]

OHHHHH SO MANY THOUGHTS TO SHARE

Holy shit. Probably the hardest I’ve laughed at any of the new seasons releases so far. Absolutely speechless

Hellhole:

- SOOOOO HAPPY to see them riff again it’s so corny and silly

- Beavis gets to hell and his first thought is where all the biker dudes are? interesting interesting *puts this in my notes

-oh my god already some amazing facial expressions

no wonder this dude ends up with so many cracked teeth in the future

- the boys being inexplicably immune to death never gets old to me

- THE DARKNESS PART HAD MY HEAD IN MY HANDS SHUT UP. THANK **GOD** IT WASN’T ANOTHER ESCAPED SNAKE SITUATION DEAR GOD IVE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER FOR A BAIT AND SWITCH

-hehe :] sillies

Overall thoughts: Another great ep this season good job guys, gave me a lot of good little laughs

The video segment was whatever but Arianna’s eye candy so like. All good :]

Take A Bow:

My god. I had absolutely no idea what was going to happen on the way in to this episode and I was NOT prepared for what it gave me and put me through

- already starting the ep strong with some GREAT facial expressions

so fucking real i used to do this to my guy friends when i was their age. not quite enough to put them in the hospital but like. yea lmao

- (monotone) “Take a bow” HAD ME DYINNNNGGGGG

- knowing about all the flavors of mountain dew what a goddamn nerd (knows everything about the different monster flavors)

- “Cherries don’t taste red at ALL. They taste all barfy” little kids complaining about foods they dont like is so silly, thank you for being your childish self its so refreshing

oh man. fuck. its butthead characterization time! finally some good fucking food. oh man here come the waterworks IMAGINE me getting stupid over an emotionally stunted idiot with a big head:

- “not until youre better beavis” first of all shut up. second of all shut up.

- “It’s like, I didn’t mean to hurt him. Feeling bad sucks.” WE KNOW BABY. WE KNOW. SO PROUD OF YOU FOR ADMITTING IT HUN :((((( the fact that bro cant even acknowledge he HAS feelings unless he’s alone. the volumes that speaks to me. man

if you had told me a week ago these were real screenoshots i wouldnt have believed you. at all. cant wait to see the looks on the faces of all the “ohh stop looking so far into it its just a stupid lowbrow cartoon” people like shut the fuck up!!!!! youve clearly never experienced real friendship before and are so pissed off cause u dont know what it looks like

- not pictured here is where they had to forcefully remove butthead from the room bc he was freaking out after thinking he killed beavis. If you disagree youre just wrong sorry!

- not only is this a funny as hell angle but man. we already know damn well he doesn’t want beavis to die but its nice to hear him say it. also he’s right, it was really funny. take a bow :]

- a lot of really good beavis screams this episode too

- BOY. HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT “COVID” IS. MR JUDGE IM STRIKING THAT FROM THE RECORDS BUT YOURE ON THIN FUCKING ICE AKJSDSNA

- “-and his friend would have died of grief shortly there-after” I’m- I need a minute. LIKE WE ALREADY KNEW THIS BUT. THANKS FOR ADMITTING IT. 

- also, god is a whiteman i guess kasjndsajkd

In conclusion: both fucking great episodes. I am always EXTRA excited for Butt-Head characterization moments, it just makes him so much more human. Not to mention how happy I am to see that they toned down his cruelty JUST a touch. I honestly didn’t notice how bad it had gotten last season until i compared it to how this one is going so far, it feels more like older seasons butthead again :] Like dont get me wrong i LOVE it when he’s mean its just who he is but it should come more out of a place of stupidity/no real self awareness than like. idk wherever it was coming from last season. These boys are goin soft on us and to that i say: thank god. It’s nice to see them act human. Take a bow has EASILY taken old man beavis’ place as my favorite ep so far and ngl its going to be tough to beat. Funny episode that had me chuckling throughout the whole thing AND nice Butt-Head moments? Oh Mike, you shouldnt have u///u

Anyways lemme know your thoughts :]