#im just making my case on why this subject interests me

[fryandleelasbigfling]

on fry, leela, and the baby carriage (pre-hulurama)

aka “jen infodumps about her freela parenting headcanons for a very long time”

i think about this a lot. other people in the fandom think about this a lot. if fry and leela do get permanently married and settle down... would they ever have kids? could that work in the narrative, somehow?

this is, in my opinion, a complicated question, but one that i think would be utterly fascinating for the show to address. and to explain it, i’m going to talk about leela and fry’s individual trauma surrounding family, the struggles this would cause them in trying to have kids, and whether they would want to give it a shot anyway.

this is going to be a very long post.

leela

i’m gonna be honest. leela has mom energy. i think this is the inevitable reality of any character played by katey sagal, but the show itself has leaned into this characterization several times -- bender sarcastically calling her “mom” in “fry am the egg man,” and of course “2d blacktop” making an entire joke about her suddenly acting like a soccer mom (though her character writing in that episode is a bit weird... i think it’s the Written By Men of it all).

but despite this, leela has a bit of a complicated relationship with the idea of motherhood. there are two episodes where she’s been convinced to conceive a child under the guise of repopulating her species. i obviously don’t count these instances towards her wanting to be a mother because A) it was out of obligation and she never suggests otherwise and B) she didn’t properly consent to either situation. 

her excitement to start a family with adlai gives a bit more credence to the idea she would genuinely want kids. in fact, she even gets the idea to adopt because of her own experience as an orphan.

however, this is complicated by how superficial her relationship with adlai was. was she genuinely excited to be a mother at this point? or was she just happy that her very normal childhood crush wants to start a nuclear family with her? is it about her actual feelings, or is she just doing what she thinks she’s “supposed” to do?

there’s also the fact she has no emotional connection (so far) to her biological offspring with kif, consistently calling them “her DNA” rather than “her kids.” this is because culturally, they’re amy’s kids, and i like that she (and the narrative) respects that they came from kif and amy’s love. it’s almost guaranteed that the tadpoles will return and i think it would be very interesting to address leela’s relationship (or lack thereof) with them. after all, part of her connection to motherhood in several of these situations is that it’s what’s expected from a committed, loving, normal relationship -- if she has a loving husband and good kids, it means she proved that she’s a lovable, capable woman after all. her accident with kif doesn’t mean any of that. 

despite these nuances, it’s clear leela is an extremely caring, dare i say maternal (no matter what her sims 3 counterpart says) person. it’s a core trait that she will do anything to take care of what she perceives as a helpless animal, probably because she spent decades without anybody to take care of her. she coddles nibbler like he’s her own baby boy, and the way he refers to himself as the “object of [her] misplaced affections” is primarily about her lack of a boyfriend, it also kind of leans into him as her substitute baby, especially since she seemingly has this hover pram thing already set up:

she was good at babysitting the de-aged coworkers in "teenage mutant leela's hurdles." she also obviously connects very strongly to the kids at the orphanarium and wants to be a good role model to them. she connects with the young jrrr and even outright says she hopes he always sees her as his mama (before he drops the detail that his species eats their mothers). 

in “the bots and the bees,” she’s the only one who isn’t fully repulsed when bev gives birth, jumps up to help her out, and is generally the most interested in bender’s journey through fatherhood. while this is because she’s a naturally helpful person with a lot of personal hangups about parenthood, i just think it’s worth noting here.

she also gushed over the nannybot back in the fox era!

even in “meanwhile,” despite a later joke that i’ll discuss later, her response to the unexplained glimmer is “if it keeps bugging us, we'll either kill it or adopt it.” literally right after their wedding, i love it so much.

i also have to bring up the futurama comics because, while they are only debatably canon, there are multiple instances that pretty much confirm that leela wants kids. issue #26 (my favorite comic hands-down) sets up leela being forlorn about the fact she isn’t close to falling in love and having a family, playing on the “biological clock” trope.

however, after the harrowing ordeal of raising her own infant and teenage selves (god i love this comic!), she stops obsessing over her biological deadline and just lives in the moment, appreciating herself. i love that! 

even more explicit is issue #62. this comic sets up that leela wants to be a mom despite the rest of the crew not thinking she’s sensitive enough to be one. (personally i think it’s kind of shoehorned dialogue and that fry is OOC to talk to leela like this at this point in their relationship, but it is very, very comics-canon that leela wants kids.)

the plot of the comic is basically she gets amnesia, zapp claims her and convinces her that she’s his wife and they have three teenage robot kids. it’s a bit of a weird plot and it’s a weak zapp characterization imo, but it does establish that leela works well taking care of the kids and they get very attached to each other to the point she wants to have a biological baby of her own. 

she’s not in a fully lucid position though and she could very well just be leaning into the tradwife role because she doesn’t know anything else until later. however, when she does get her memory back, she obviously rejects zapp violently, but she is genuinely endeared to the robot kids to the point of crying. so this probably goes beyond just leela wanting to prove she can do something she was told she can’t do.

(granted the comic does have this as the punchline but it’s pretty clear that as caring as leela is, she’s got a lot on her plate which would get in the way of her being a mother in her actual working life)

there’s also an extremely cute comic where everybody becomes a scout leader and leela leads a bunch of mutant scouts and it gets me feelsy. it’s literally the issue right before the mommy leela one. something on the writers’ minds i guess.

so does this mean leela should be a mom? honestly, i would like to see her accept that she doesn’t have to be a mom to have worth in her life, but she still wants to be, once she feels ready to do so. a lot of leela’s arc is learning that she doesn’t have to fit someone else’s idea of a perfect woman, or a perfect family, or a perfect love life, just to stop being lonely -- she needs to lean into what makes her feel confident and happy. if she feels fulfilled taking care of a child, then she should go ahead and do it. not out of obligation towards the universe or towards the “good, respectable woman” mold -- just cuz it would make her happy. (this is why, if her role as “the other” really is referring to her needing to be a mom to fry’s child for some sort of Chosen One prophecy, i really hope they don’t play that straight, because i very much want leela’s autonomy to be a focus of any arc dealing with her being a mother and i do not want her to be forced into it after multiple other episodes where she almost gets tricked into conceiving a child.)

i can see her struggling with perfectionism about it, though. we see in issue #26 that she struggles to calm her baby self and communicate with her teenage self and i think not knowing exactly what to do would put a lot of stress on her because she’s so used to being the one who has everything together. i think she might have to reel herself in from lashing out and then feel guilty about not being an “ideal” loving mother.

“teenage mutant leela’s hurdles” shows her deliberately trying to live out what she thinks a “normal” teenage youth entails because she never got that as an actual child, and i wonder if she would project these same ideal expectations onto her own child, particularly if she had a daughter. (i do think fry is good at helping her outgrow this desire to fit a particular mold, though, as are her parents.) she’s also really obsessed with being a good role model (”a leela of her own,” “yo leela leela”) and i can see her worrying that any fault of her child is a reflection of her “failures” as a parent.

it’s interesting to think that leela probably never expected to have biological kids due to being the last of her kind (though i do headcanon she once had a pregnancy scare with sean). but i also headcanon that mutants don’t have a lot of kids, as we don’t see many, if any kids in the sewers (barring an issue or two in the comics where mutant kids show up). it would make sense because A) a lot of mutants don’t want to bring kids into their life situation, B) they can mutate enough to live for very long times so reproducing isn’t as needed, and C) i don’t think a lot of them want to or even can have sex with each other, ha ha. i can see there being a lot of pressure from her parents, because they probably also want to live vicariously and actually be able to raise a baby like they always wanted to, especially on the surface. 0′)

i don’t think her being a “strong independent woman” is at odds with this arc, either, as long as it’s not treated as an obligation. bojack horseman has a great example in princess carolyn of a character who still wants to have a family despite being a career woman who is incredibly attached to her work, and she doesn’t have to give either of it up if she has people to support her. i think it helps that we have amy to contrast, as she didn’t want kids (despite ending up with them, though i suspect kif will be the one taking care of them). 

(also, female writers. that goes a long way in making an arc like this not come across as a derailment.) 

fry

there is much more to say about leela than fry because they haven’t done as much with this subject when it comes to him. sure, he has a son, technically, but y’know... it’s his dad, and he never sees that as anything but a weird sexual encounter he had in the past.

but i do think fry would want kids with leela, especially if that’s what she wants. there’s a one-off line that implies he’s not opposed to this in “the cyber house rules,” though this is before he (knowingly) sees leela as anything more than an attractive coworker and doesn’t care much about long-term goals yet. it’s really more a joke about fry just being extremely persuasive (especially given how he gets roped into bender’s mass adoption scheme). 

but the actual biggest thing that makes me wanna see fry as a dad: he is so, so, so attached to taking care of things, usually in the context of animals in need. he saved seymour from starvation, brought the orphaned leelu out of depression, and protected mr peppy at the risk of his own life. creatures are naturally drawn to him for some reason, probably because he’s got such a big heart and lacks the reservations most people have. he connects to animals at their level and doesn’t have the confidence to act superior most of the time. i think this can easily be applied to kids as well. 

“fry am the egg man” is probably the most glaring example of this, because he immediately latches onto the egg when he learns the egg has a chance of hatching. (which kind of raises some “pro-life” questions that aren’t necessarily contradictory to fry’s political upbringing, but i think He Could Outgrow That in the right situation, ideally.)

his initial plan is to eat it but he does genuinely get so attached and protective and it’s sweet to me. he does drop it at the end and quickly detach but i think this at least shows that he has a real sense of love even if his sense of responsibility and focus can slip sometimes. (this is where i remind the audience that leela lays eggs according to “leela and the genestalk” so fry being good at raising eggs could be very useful there)

fry grew up with a very inconsistently-affectionate, often emotionally neglectful family. like leela, he doesn’t have a really clear reference point of what a good family unit entails, but he isn’t self-aware enough to seek it out. he can be reckless and indulgent, and that often puts whatever he’s caring for at risk, but he is loving. we know from his behavior towards leela (and bender, and even a few of his other girlfriends) that he will put his life on the line for what he loves. and i think if he had a baby with leela, it would mean so much more to him, because he loves leela so much i don’t think he would want any child of hers to be in danger. he just needs to be able to recognize what danger is.

one of the comics i didn’t bring up yet is issue #32, which introduces us to the closest thing we have to a canon freela baby: leelan von fry-bot, a hybrid clone mixed with fry and leela’s DNA (so not the result of nookie😔) that also takes over a bender copy’s body and overthrows humans for oppressing him like a boss. anyway my point is that fry’s initial reaction to having a kid isn’t more than “oh cool this means leela and i have sex” (and thus getting slapped bc their dynamic is still kind of like that by this point in the comics), but when leelan gets apprehended, he straight-up forgives the little genocidal maniac. 

i don’t think fry really thought of himself with kids before leela. pre-canon, i don’t think he expected to settle down or have any committed relationship that didn’t exist for the purpose of mooching and surviving. i do think, if he did have a child, fry always saw himself with a son (again, not counting yancy sr). there’s a joke in “the route of all evil” that is analogous to him wanting a son (”i hope it's a lager, so I can take it to a ball game”), and in FATEM, he specifically wants the egg “to blossom into a beautiful young man, like [he] did as a baby.” it’s just easier for him to project that way and i think the culture of his house (i.e. the persistence of the yancy fry name) would put a lot of expectations on the boys to have sons. i think not having a son would surprise him but he’d still get so excited. he’d probably expect his daughter to be an action hero as much as leela does (though i think his expectations are way lower). 

we also see in later episodes that while he represses it, fry really does miss having family and gets very quickly attached to the family he does have ("near death wish," "game of tones") so i think having a kid, especially biological offspring, would shake him to his core in a way he didn't expect could ever happen. it helps solidify to him that leela truly is his family now.

there’s also a gag early in the comics when they need to get more humans on earth and it’s implied fry asks leela to repopulate the planet but otherwise idrk if there’s much specifically with him and kids. 

there’s the other joke in “meanwhile” where he implies it’s good they didn’t have children because they might get violent with them (and admittedly they have gotten a bit aggressive with kids in the past, i.e. leela trying to hit cubert), but personally i don’t think fry would do that, even if it’s been implied domestic abuse was uncomfortably normalized for him. leela might be tempted but i think she can reel herself in. and the reason i think they didn’t have kids in the meanwhile timeline is just because it would be too risky to bring a child into a universe where nobody else is sentient and able to help them out, especially after fry and leela die. 

so my conclusion is that fry might not be knowledgeable on the traditions and necessities of healthy parenting right away, but i think he would try to learn. he clearly tries to learn for the people he loves, even when it’s hard, and making leela happy is his top priority. he doesn’t want her to get stuck with all the hardship (even if she’s still gonna be better at organization and the like). and i think he has such an earnest, unfiltered sense of love that he can connect to his own children immediately. and i think they’d sense that.

here’s a fry kid dogpile for extra cuteness

the narrative potential

fry and leela having kids has been thrown around the writers’ room a lot, according to commentaries. now most of this information i’ve gotten secondhand as i haven’t listened to most commentaries or read older interviews as much. there is an interview/commentary (i forget specifically which) where the writers joke that fry and leela would not be good parents because they’d either be dragging their kids with them on dangerous space missions all the time or leaving them home for long periods of time. (edit: there's also this 2010 bit where DXC says he doesn't want them to "[have] a baby and [move] to the suburbs" or anything for the show's sake lol)

this is an extremely understandable reason not to give fry and leela kids. it’s already bad enough when you overthink where cubert and dwight are during farnsworth and hermes’ various adventures, and fry and leela both work so this is an obstacle. there are ways around this practically -- get leela’s parents or even nibbler to babysit, or get a hologram or something as a proxy, or even have fry stay home at times. but it changes up the dynamic of the show in ways that might be hard to adapt to, especially if they’re already doing something similar with amy and kif. plus, they probably don’t wanna make fry and leela too domestic -- i know they worried about that back in season 6 which led to all the on-and-off stuff, but i think now their concern is just staying sci-fi and not simpsonsy.

but they’ve also, reportedly, teased the idea before, and i think the changing landscape of adult animation (a bit more room for serialization and more serious story elements, which futurama always dabbled in even before other shoes did). rumor has it that the original plot of “law and oracle” involved fry and leela’s son coming back from the future (and i think talking backwards or something???), but it was scrapped for i believe being too dark. i think a time traveling child is a great way to avoid the status quo shift of raising a child, even though it would be pretty big and tragic for fry and leela to meet their child and then watch them go knowing they won’t exist for several years. it’d be funny to see their child try and ensure their conception, or maybe even prevent it in some sort of twist on the trope. (this is one of my theories for “the temp.”)

we’ve seen hints of them as parents in “the route of all evil” where they both get hype about bender’s analogous pregnancy with beer, though they’re also excited to... have beer, lol. also some of my friends read a lot into the way they look at tonya in “stench and stenchability” and i do not blame them for that.

this concern about the status quo is also where adoption can come up again, as i can totally see fry and leela adding some wayward teenager to their family, someone just self-sufficient enough to not be too much of a detriment to the crew. i know the orphanarium kids are all adopted (though they could easily go back on that) but ideally i’d like them to adopt a mutant kid; i think it would mean a lot to leela for obvious reasons. maybe an alien or a robot, even. it doesn’t need to be formal adoption -- i can see them just picking up some lost little outcast guy because they feel bad he has nobody to raise him. maybe not for the rest of the series but even for an episode it’d be funny.

however, i think the idea of them having biological kids is utterly fascinating. is there precedent for a mutant breeding with a normal human? if leela “occasionally lays an egg,” what other weird stuff happens with her reproduction system? having an egg to carry could be another way to make the baby plot easier without incapacitating leela and fry too much after all. (and like i said before it’d be so cute to imagine fry carrying around an egg all protectively... like the dad in harvey beaks.) i think more people should take advantage of leela’s mutant genetics and give their offspring a bit more of her latent mutant traits, or traits from her parents’ side. more tentacles and tails and sheddable skin! hell, give them three eyes like leela’s grandma!

(but i think leela actually being pregnant would be interesting too. you know she’d be even more emotionally fucked up than usual on hormones, and would get so stubborn about not being incapacitated and not needing help even though fry keeps wanting to dote on her. also i wonder if mutant pregnancy would be different at all? radioactive morning sickness? fun! it would make some aspects of the show harder to work around though, like i do not know if she could fit behind the wheel while pregnant without making weird adjustments, and i also worry about the infamy behind the whole MWC pregnancy arc, but i don’t think that same uncomfortable and traumatic risk translates to animation.)

and what about fry’s genetics? does his child inherit the lack of delta brainwave? this comes up a lot in freela baby talk, especially with the “chosen one” theory, that fry’s brain thing and leela’s mutant thing might combine in some world-saving combination. again, i’d rather this be deconstructed, because nibbler trying to coax fry and leela to have babies for the sake of the universe is amusing but also pretty fucked-up, and we know fry doesn’t like being used and leela has already had this kind of deceptive thing happen to her before. i want them to do this because they want to, not out of some debt to the universe. that’s way too much pressure on them and their kid.

even putting that aside, i can see both fry and leela having insecurities about having a child, especially biologically. leela of course has her mutant/cyclops trauma and aforementioned perfectionism, but i think fry would be worried too about “ruining” their child with his own mental issues. i can see a sitcom type of story where they try to conceive (maybe with some weird sci-fi assistive technology) but start panicking when it doesn’t work and blaming themselves. one of my theories for “parasites regained” is that fry only takes the worms again when he’s trying to get leela pregnant, because he knows leela loves him for him by now, but he still wants to make sure their child is as perfect and healthy as can be. (i could even see a twist with leela also taking the parasites due to having these same issues.) honestly them getting pregnant on accident (and you know fry’s pullout game weak) would also throw them for a loop.

there’s also the complicated drama and fun of bender getting jealous of fry putting his attention towards not just his wife, but some smelly brat he put inside her. bender sometimes has the vibes of being fry and leela’s bratty teenage son so i love him interacting with their kid like a bitter older brother.

even if they don’t give fry and leela a kid, i could see them bait-and-switching the audience cuz they know it’s such a big deal to some people. like leela seems to have pregnancy symptoms but it’s really just some weird facehugger possession or womb horror. or they catch a glimpse of their future and think they see themselves with a kid but it’s out of context. or they knock fry up instead cuz they love making the guys pregnant instead. i have this joke idea for when the kif babies come back that leela seems to get baby fever really bad, but it’s a literal fever she contracted from the amphibiosian swamp and it’s only cured by the insanity of babysitting the kif babies. 

honestly if they decide they’re not ready to have kids, if they’re not emotionally stable enough or they don’t have a good place to live or if they’re worried about bender or their careers, i’m fine with that. i’d actually love them communicating and deciding on that together! i think it’s just an interesting subject to explore and i really hope the revival does something with it. :)

[bulldagger-bait]

Will never forget being a kid and telling someone i was south african only to have them ask:

"Did you have clothes in africa?"

"Had you ever had a bath before coming to Australia?"

"Did you live in a house with walls and bricks?"

Like. Yeah, I guess we were 8... But also i feel like a lot of people's understanding of "Africa" has never really progressed past that point.

[teekays]

hello! if memory serves you are the blog that talked about boy band pretty as a marketing tactic (or something to that effect? the search function does not work so if i’m wrong i’m terribly sorry) and i was wondering if you would be willing to find someone from each team (can include prospects if you want) to create the ultimate nhl boy band. this is not a necessary thing to do, solely shits and gigs and if you ever feel like it doing it. have a lovely day!

HIIIIIII that WAS me and you sent this at the perfect time because i am at the laundromat with time to kill and i LOVE to discuss this.... let's chop it up.... a few disclaimers: this is subjective so don't get mad at me and i will be including prospects and ahl players where i know its applicable BUT for most of these teams i will be going off the main roster + looks alone because if i did a full deep dive vibes analysis on every team's roster and prospects it would take me like two months to answer this ask... you understand. we are being SHALLOW here today in the true spirit of the boy band industry. let's go!!!

carolina hurricanes: i know everyone wants me to say sebastian aho but he is 1) too old 2) too unsettling looking. the elf on the shelf is not boy band pretty im sorry 😭 i do love him but he's just not the vibe here... i will say based on looks either scott morrow or jackson blake and his 90s heartthrob hair. i want to say seth jarvis because he's my special pop pop but that does contradict almost everything i have said previously so i will not be biased but know that if he was a pop star i would be his biggest fan i would kiss his poster. and that's my truth

columbus blue jackets: in the interest of journalistic integrity i went to their roster instead of just saying it's obviously kj as the intimidating aloof one in the boy ("boy") band but actually i do think it's cole sillinger.... teen heartthrob. also i didn't know that he was born in columbus because his dad was playing for the team and his brother is also on the team??? imagine having a whole destiny like that and its for COLUMBUS OHIO 😭

new jersey devils: jack hughes. open and shut case argue with the WALL

new york islanders: NOT MAT BARZAL. HE LOOKS 35. STAND UP LADIES!!! lowkey i do not know any of these dudes and this roster is kind of busted as fuck 😭😭😭 (NOT ANTHONY DUCLAIR who is too old to be a boy band boy but who i do love) bargain bin team... anyway isaiah george YOU! are the only cute person the new york islanders

new york rangers: matt rempe. those pictures of him lounging around on the phone??? wow. no words. diva heartthrob behavior. it's sad what they're doing to him what are we doing to our beautiful queens :(

philadelphia flyers: after much careful deliberation.... i think denver barkey is taking it. denver is such a deeply boy band name tbh he was born for this!!! i know everyone thinks it's jamie (who i still forget is a flyer 😭) but can you imagine him on a stage? singing a song? they are reinventing shoegaze for him. negative star quality (AFFECTIONATE!!!!!!! LOVING!!!!!!!!!!!!)

pittsburgh penguins: well NOW the obvious answer is rutger mcgroarty... not even worth going through that senior center roster when he's there tbh sorry pens

washington capitals: AGAIN. SENIOR CENTER ROSTER. i had to go to their prospects page to find someone suitable and my vote is patrick leonard he's a cutie!!! also im so sorry to say this but my jaw dropped when i got to this guy why are you playing hockey you need to make a children's album RIGHT NOW. i know he could do a banger cover of the We're going on a bear hunt song. but i digress...

boston bruins: matthew poitras is adorable and exudes star quality NEXTTTT. shoutout also brett harrison who looks like a long lost jonas brother

buffalo sabres: JACK QUINNN JQUIZZY HIMSELF partly for looks mostly for vibes... he has extreme "jack dylan grazer vape apology video" energy and also he has that boyish charm... either him or devon levi (hot) not miss owen power for the same reasons as jamie. she could never be a pop star 😔 ryan mcleod used to be the oilers popstar boy but now he's got too much competition he's a little niche for the title

detroit red wings: my gut tells me simon edvinsson but a look at the roster tells me there is some competition in the form of amadeus lombardi... if we were discussing this two years ago mo seider would be the obvious answer but he's too grizzled now 😔

florida panthers: 🙄 here comes another busted fucking roster... i guess denisenko??? panthers are not really representing here....

montreal canadiens: ARBER <3 he's like the bad boy hottie in the boy band. the one that makes your dad shake his head when he sees him on tv

ottawa senators: wow the atlantic division is fucking WACK this was another case of like. okay i guess ill pick one of yous but REALLY? so congratulations jorian donovan YOU are in the boy band

tampa bay lightning: seriously what is going on in this division. jack finley looks like he was the closeted one in a boy band from the early 2000s but he's aged past that now and he has a husband and a wine brand.... so we will bring him back for nostalgia points. welcome to the team. also i have to be honest i thought of myself as pretty well acquainted with the ahl but the SYRACUSE CRUNCH? that's crazy

leafs: JOSEPH WOLL! boyish charm out the ears on that one. a real cutie

chicago: obviously it's bedard. we all know it's bedard. on the surface he has no charisma but he does have a certain kind of shy boy charm and he IS adorable... he's the one in the boy band who makes your mom tut over him like "he seems like a nice boy"

colorado avalanche: wow huge props to matt stienburg for having maybe the single most boy band roster photo i have seen yet... THIS is the guy they get in the boy band because he's already had huge success with his hit single called like, Heart React Girlfriend or whatever. this is jacob sartorius if he played hockey. this is chase dreams. this kid is going places

dallas stars: it's obviously wyjo, joining the ranks with cbedard as The Nice One <3

minnesota wild: okay i was going to say brock faber because every group needs a kevin jonas (SORRY BROCK) but WHO is kyle masters and why does he look like knockoff brendan brisson. budget briss. diet briss. we have briss at home.

nashville predators: this just reminded me cody glass is a penguin now 💔 anyway the preds have some STRONG contenders here wow.... jeremy hanzel is taking it but i think luke evangelista could pull it off... now if you asked me to be really subjective it would be ozzy wiesblatt who would also be the subject of much poster kissing and rigged "which member of the nhl boy band should you date" tests so i get him as the result but that's just me....

st louis blues: jeremie biakabutuka your radiant smile has charmed me.... welcome to the band....

utah whatevers: MONTANA ONYEBUCHI I AM SO FUCKING SORRY THE SHARKS DIDNT APPRECIATE YOU. BUT WE WILL..... also matt villalta kinda giving off brand kj... you could build a whole off brand version of that umich team just with guys from other teams i bet

winnipeg jets: dylan coghlan you will always be famous to ME but i fear you are a little too old for our purposes here.... other than him they kinda don't have a lot going for them.... brayden yager it is your time to shine as off brand owen power ♥️

anaheim ducks: some strong competition here... tz is the obvious choice but i think we need to think bigger... olen zellwegger please step forward....

calgary flames: matt coronato i am free on thursday if you would like to hang out on thursday when i am free and also join this boy band

edmonton oilers: yet another old ass roster 😭 they're lucky they got so many sabres because matt savoie is saving their asses rn

los angeles kings: angus booth is smizing in every single photo i saw of him so. come on now

san jose sharks: it's so obviously will smith i don't even know what we're doing here tbh

seattle kraken: tye kartye looks like he would be into white water rafting so he can be the nature guy in the boy band.... strong competition from tucker robertson but he's just a touch too gay porn for this vibe

vancouver canucks: JETT WOO... HELLO.... but also shoutout cole mcward for having 2014 gay youtuber phenotype. a connor franta troye sivan type face if ive ever seen one

vegas golden knights: BRISS ‼️‼️‼️ my little tabloid queen... not only is he in the boy band but he's in the news and the media. he was born to be a star. natural ham. child actor energy. alex holtz is also a strong contender for this but i think he's off on his own doing his little pop star solo act thing

this took way longer than laundromat time but it was worth it i had so much fun!!!!! thank you!!!!!!

[phoenix-bleh]

Okay hear me out on this one because I got this idea from strolling down memory lane of the undertale fandom. Headcanons for the ancient heroes at PTA (Parent–teacher association) meeting.

Sadly I don't remember much of the undertale fandom never really got DEEP into it.

Pure Vanilla Cookie

Definitely the most responsible parent in my opinion.

Also happy to meet other parents and makes events to raise money.

Makes sure the kids have a safe learning environment.

Why do I feel like he has something to do with the school cafeteria menu.

He's most likely the one who has suggestion on what the kids should actually be learning.

Doesn't he have his own academy in his kingdom??

If that were the case he's the one operating the pta meetings

White Lily Cookie

Encourages learning outside!

Definitely has something to say when it comes to what the students are learning and how the students are being taught the subject.

She would know she used to be a top star students herself.

I think she would be a bit more old fashion tho.

But she's open to knew ideas.

Probably like Pure Vanilla but less expressive with her plans

Hollyberry Cookie

She's that parent that would come up to you and start showing you pictures of her children and telling you stories of them.

More of the fun parent and always coming up with ideas on how the kids at the school can have more fun with what they do.

Is in charge of those after school clubs and gives more variety of activities so the kids can be open to knew skills.

However being the fun one she's just a tad bit more responsible then Golden Cheese

Golden Cheese Cookie

Just like Holleyberry but she way to chill about things.

Says things like "Oh just let the kids have their fun."

And it could be something relating to preventing the kids from passing notes to each other or something.

Probably not that much involved in the meetings but can be when it's a subject she most interest about.

Loves to make sure that all the students are getting involved in out door activates

Dark Cacao Cookie

Um I feel like their not much to say about him

He's kind of just there

In charge of the schools sports most likely

Makes sure that the students have a safe learning space as well

sorry I can't think much for him 😭

sorry this one a bit short it's late at night and im pretty tired- but hope you enjoy it anyways<3 if not i am terribly sorry-

[shotorozu]

ooh, can i please request "pulling your partner onto your lap" for Izuku?? ty!!

OTHER WAY AROUND — MIDORIYA IZUKU

(send me a bnha character + a physical intimacy prompt and i’ll make something out of it!)

gender neutral reader, reader has an assertive personality, reader is STRONG but no mentions of a quirk, lower case intended 😭

note(s): hey yall 🧍‍♀️ i know im posting these slowly as i could possibly go but something real bad happened at school, so i just had to delay the uploads a little bit (but i am feeling a bit better so expect at least one post per day this week because of valentines day 😭)

»»————-　♡　————-««

midoriya izuku if not rarely— never pouts.

he recognizes pouting as a part of sulking— which is a normal thing. (in fact, he does it a lot)

as much as no one really says it out loud, everyone has done it at least once in their life. a kid pouting because they couldn’t get their parents to buy them that toy they really wanted, a teenager that’s feeling particularly moody that hour, or an adult thats plans just didn’t work out.

he feels lots of things, especially after all he’s been through. at this point, what hasn’t he felt? positive, negative (sulking included) and the neutral. of course he has— it’s all a part of the process, but for some reason, he feels the need to suppress the negative a little (an understatement) more than regular.

midoriya izuku if not rarely— never pouts.

but he’s doing exactly that, and you know it. he’s sulking, pouting over something that doesn’t look worthy enough to be pouting over for the green haired teenager personally. and he knows that you know— so, he just hopes that means he doesn’t have to say it out loud. he isn’t sure if it’s something you’d usually ask or tell someone.

but he knows you— your unofficial ability to pull out any thought out of his mind, so he knows he’ll give in and end up fessing up what’s on his mind. he just knows.

you step in front of him, and he’s pulled out of his trance when you tap his chin and tilt his head upwards.

“why the long face? hmm…” you question, humming thoughtfully to yourself afterwards. if izuku’s pouting— then that’s when you know that something’s really, really wrong.

he cracks an imbalanced smile, “does it bother you?”

“not really,” you bring your unoccupied hand to cup his cheek, “it’s just that my boyfriend’s pouting, y’know? so how could i not ask?”

he brings his hand up to rest against the hand cupping his cheek, “it’s almost as if you see right through me.” he intones, sounding less shocked and more— interested and genuine.

“i mean, you’re not exactly slick.” you bluntly remark, “an open book.”

he goes red at that— “i figured,” and he starts to wonder how many times he’s been obvious on something he was trying to conceal. oh the embarrassment is starting to flood through him—

“so go on, shoot.” but it goes out the window when you start scratching under his chin like he was a cat. a shiver urges to run through him.

but the less embarrassed he becomes, the more insecure he grows. the main reason why he was pouting in the first place starts to come back to him.

“so,” he begins, clearing his throat with a cough, “promise you won’t think it’s weird?”

“i promise,” to him, your eyes look like they twinkled with sincerity. “although, you’ve really gotten me curious. is it actually weird or are you just being subjective?”

an open book, he thinks to himself. you’re so right about him. it’s like you know him like the back of your hand.

“it could be both? depends.. maybe.. actually..? ” he mumbles, genuinely considering which reason was it. you blink— and you become dead silent, as a way to allow him to respond.

he understands, “okay so,” he squeezes your hand cupping his face, “why don’t you want to sit on my lap?”

you don’t respond, like you’re expecting more out of his question. but to find the green haired hero in training not say anything else, and blink back in similar fashion— translated into ‘oh, that was really it’ for you.

“..is there more you wanna say?” you speak after a few seconds of nobody saying anything pass by, “i find it hard to believe that there’s no context to this apparently weird question. because honestly, this isn’t strange. i’m wounded by your dishonesty.”

izuku lets out a chuckle, which was genuine, but ended up sounding nervous. he begins to fiddle with his hands,

“there is context,” he gulps, taking his gaze off of you— being unable to take the extensive amount of eye contact. “it’s just that, i’ve carried a lot of people, so far. because of heroics, y’know? and most of them also sat in my lap— although unintentional. i’ve asked you before, but whenever i do it’s like.. you don’t say no, but you act as if nothing happened?”

you hum, allowing him to carry on— and you continue to scratch under his chin while listening.

“and if you don’t want to, that’s totally fine! but if it’s because you’re worried about crushing me or what not, then i don’t think it’s a concern—”

“izuku,” you cut in, halting all movements to take your hands off of him. he misses the contact already, “don’t you think it’s because i want it to be the other way around?”

he gulps rather loudly.

“what does.. that mean?” he questions, feeling his face already starting to warm up rapidly.

laughing, you poke his cheek. “although i don’t mind your idea, i prefer the idea of you planted on my lap instead.”

he lets out a squeak, and your laughter rings in his ears again.

“oh!” he exclaims, he only wished your laughter would’ve provided physical comfort like how it usually does— but it only managed to make him flush red more. “i.. i see!”

“yep.” your lips make the ‘p’ pop with emphasis.

“that.. makes sense. i never thought of it that way!”

you give izuku a smile, patting your thighs with both hands as a signal. he knows what you’re trying to tell him— he’s done it as a signal to you before. for him, it was done so casually.

yet for some reason, with your assertiveness, it was anything but.

“you want me to…?”

you pat your lap again, “it’s right here.”

“okay, okay. alright,” your freckled boyfriend breathes in deeply. suddenly, he found himself standing up and putting his jittering hands on your shoulders lightly— heart making several steep drops in his chest.

and then, you’re lowering him on your lap, and he lets out yet another squeak as you maneuver him on your lap, sitting him on one leg and spreading his legs across yours in seconds.

you pat his thigh, just to feel what it’s like to have his legs on top of yours, and you shift your hand to rest it against the small of his back.

he wonders if his heart could hammer against his chest any harder. he could hear it in his ears, and he was acutely aware of it.

despite it, he’s clinging to you like he belongs (he does) and he wraps an arm around your shoulder. “i’m sorry if i’m—”

“shh, shh.” you hush him, bringing the hand that’s not resting against his back up to stroke the back of his head— petting his hair and threading through the green, voluminous locks with your fingers.

“hypocrite.” you whisper, but you don’t exactly mean anything malice of it. “telling me not to worry about me being heavy on you, but here you are, worrying about being heavy on me.”

“my bad—”

“no,” you’re almost amazed by the way he could find new ways to apologize, “just, enjoy this, will you? isn’t this nice? this is what it must feel for those people to be sitting on your lap. it’s comfy, right?”

you’re assertive, but izuku could also sense the tiniest speck of nervousness in your voice. he knows you just like how you know him— you’re minding the way you’re coming off right now, and his reaction to all of this, like you’re worried he wouldn’t like it

which is out of the ballpark, because—

“yeah, you’re right.” he whispers, “this is comfy.”

this might start to become his next favorite past time.

»»————-　♡　————-««

[teagballs]

hands! | gob bluth x reader smut

authors note: crawls towards you hi im back. for my fellow hand enthusiasts. this has been in my drafts for like a MONTH finished it today. still taking arrested development requests but now i also that its always sunny and what we do in the shadows and beetlejuice.... yeah. love ya enjoy <3

cw: smut obviously. first person perspective hand kink. gob teases alot because he is an ass. clit play, fingering, hickies. written with fem reader in mind and they have a vagina.

nsfw under cut

-------------------------------------------------------

My boyfriend, Gob, had an interesting hobby. Magic. Not the most attractive or accomplished interest, but it was his and I loved him so I went along with it. Coming to his shows, helping him learn new tricks, even being a stand in for his assistant in some cases. I always tried to support him.

Now, I sat in his kitchen, watching as my boyfriend performed a card trick. And it wasn't all that enticing, he kept getting it wrong and dropping his cards all over the table. His dedication was cute. I smiled a little and tried to hold interest. But slowly, my mind began to drift. The way his long fingers glided over the edge of the cards, and how they flicked through them to pick out a select amount. I had always had a thing for hands, and it was seemly arising again now.

"Now, watch I'll get it this time, pick a card." Gob said, laser focused on the cards. I hummed in acknowledgement and picked a card. As he ran his nimble fingers over the deck and shuffled once more my mind began to wander. What kind of dexterity would a magician hold in his hands? Trying not to get flustered and attempting to lock this thought away, I crossed my legs as if to hold back my arousal and sat up straighter. 'Sexualising your boyfriend's innocent hobby? Perv,' I thought.

I tried to focus solely on the trick but that seemed to make things worse. God, he had nice hands. Lengthy digits, veins that ran on the back of his hands, was I blushing? Gob looked at me again, ready to ask for my card back to shuffle into the pile, but he seemed to pick up that my focus had shifted. Maybe he had gathered from my upright form and fidgeting that something was off and I wasn't fully present.

"Hey, are you paying attention?" He groaned childishly.

'Yes. Definitely, I am." I replied quickly, tensing a little.

"You're not. You look all distracted." Gob replied. Shit, he had picked up on it. I couldn't tell him the truth - the reason I wasn't fully focused was because his hands were really fucking turning me on.

"No I am really! It's just that, I.. um," I struggled to find an excuse, hoping the ground would swallow me up. If I wasn't flustered before I certainly was now. I settled on just awkwardly looking away from him, hoping he would either move away from the subject or figure it out on his own.

"What's up with you? You're all... oh." The pin dropped. Gob realised why I was so distracted. My hand grazed my face, trying to decide if he gotten there from context clues or if the blood had rushed to my face.

"So, what's got you so riled up?" he teased. The switch from showman to flirtatious dick was fast. He leaned over the table now, lowering his voice and tone.

"Riled up? What are you talking about?" Gob might be a little stupid, but he could still tell I were lying.

"You're blushing, that impressed by my magic?" He questioned. His ego was showing. There was no escaping this. I sighed and gave in.

"No its not your magic its... your hands." I admitted shamefully. Gob raised an eyebrow, confused.

"I've always had a thing for them. I find them, like, attractive, like you'd find ass or tits attractive, they just.. they make me think about what they can do, what'd they'd feel like on me, inside me." I babbled, trying desperately to explain my weird attraction.

To my surprise and relief Gob understood? He hummed in acknowledgement. "I get it." I could feel myself growing wetter.

"I guess you doing a magic trick... it made me think you know, cause your a magician, what else can you, um, do with your hands." I told him, looking anywhere but at him.

Gob smirked at this, filled with pride. "Well, how about you find out?"

I lifted my head to look at him, "...What?" I mumbled.

"Why don't you find out how good my hands are at other things?" His smirk grew.

Gob made his way over to me and kissed me. He grabbed onto my shirt to guide me out of the room. He moved his hands to my face as the kiss grew deeper stumbling out of the kitchen. The whole situation had made us both so desprate, essentially eating eachothers faces now. The pair of us stumbled onto the sofa, pulling away briefly to catch our breath with a string of saliva connecting. This time when we reconnected, Gob began to work the button of my jeans. I whimpered in anticipation. Gob's hand made its way into my jeans. Gently, using his ring and middle finger he felt my wetness through my underwear.

"Fuck. You really must like hands huh?" He chuckled goofily.

To help with ease of access, I began to shimmy my jeans off. Now, Gob was able to pull my underwear down. The cold air on my pussy made me arch my back. Gob hovered above md, hands on either side of my face on the communal sofa, which was about to be desecrated. He ran his index finger up my now exposed slit. He started slow, painfully slow. I twitched and bucked my hips, antsy for more. He repeated this movement until he gathered a sufficient amount of wetness. Finally, he ran small, steady circles around my soaked clit. This caused me to mewl out. I was a little embarrassed at how loud I were for such a small movement, though, this only seemed to encourage Gob. He continued his slow pace, but this definitely wasn't enough.

"Please Gob, please go fucking faster," I grunted out of frustration. Ever willing, Gob increased the speed. I grinded my clit down on his finger. In response, Gob switched to two fingers and started kneading my bundle of nerves an accelerated speed. Fuck. He was gifted with his hands. This new pace was overstimulating. He maintained it as I loudly moaned praises and a string of obscenities.

"Fuck! Gob- so fucking good- m'gonna-" was all I could get out before cumming.

Gob was full of himself now. Shocked at his own abilities. "Wow. And I haven't even touched here yet," he said, plunging his fingers in my drenched entrance. This action caused me to emit another loud sob to Gob's delight.

"Shouldn't waste anymore time." He mused and thrusted two fingers into my pussy. I arched again. A little awkwardly, Gob repositioned us both. Now he was sitting on the sofa with me in his lap, his fingers taunting me by hovering above where I needed them most.

"Please," I mumbled. He smiled before placing his two fingers in and out of my wetness. It was too slow. Not deep enough to feel any pleasure. My hole clenched around his fingers, my body's way of revealing yearning with using my words. He began a pace of moving his fingers. I needed more, needed him to go deeper, faster. Gob found my eagerness all too amusing. Once he reinserted his fingers to my drenched pussy again, he curled them. This action caused me to let out a long moan.

"Fuuuuuck." I groaned. Gob smirked against my neck, growing more and more proud of his ability to please. He attached his mouth to my neck, gingerly sucking love bites and kissing me gently as he continued to guide his fingers in and out of me. Gradually, he increased his pace. He began to pump in and out of my pussy, continuing to curl his fingers. He kept this up until he was fingering me at an excruciating pace, I wasn't going to last much longer.

"Fuck! Gob, m'gonna cum soon." I sobbed. Gob took this as a challenge. How quick could he make me cum? He reached his other hand down to my pussy and began to rub my clit again at a ferocious pace. This, combined with the attention to my neck was more than enough to send me over the edge and bring me to an orgasm for the second time.

I fell against my boyfriend, my head found its place in the crook of his neck. Exhaused. I look up to find Gob, licking the result of his labor off his fingers. I whimper a little at the sight, fuck that's hot. But I'm too tired to go again. Gob chuckles, "Did they live up to your expectations?" He asks, wiggling his hands in a sort of 'jazz hands' motion. I groan. I'm never going to hear the end of this. Cocky bastard.

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

The way substance abuse has been handled on the show thus far genuinely upsets me and reeks of writers who either 1.) don't understand the subject matter they're presenting and haven't done even the bare minimum to research it or, worse, 2.) simply don't care.

Apologies for the slight rant incoming, your comment about how it has been mostly "handled" off-screen got me going because that's 100% true and in that truth is such a missed opportunity for the show. The way it has been handled winds up feeling incredibly shallow and juvenile at the end of the day, especially for a piece of media that is attempting to present itself as "adult" and navigate multiple incredibly sensitive topics. I'll try not to get into my own personal experiences and will speak broadly, but the show uses substance abuse more as a cheap character flaw to poke fun at or something to magically handwave away when it is inconvenient, rather than the life-altering, debilitating illness that it is.

Nothing about Angel's use is ever meaningfully explored. It's so (apparently) unimportant to his arc and development that one rude comment from Husk (a character who ALSO has a problem with gambling and alcohol that is never addressed) is all it takes for him to suddenly "resist temptation" and be shown as "recovered" (unless I'm misremembering). Or was he suddenly going to counseling off-screen too and its just another thing that will be told to us rather than shown? And how does Charlie even handle that at the Hotel (I'd be really interested in this as a moment for her character to have to grow/change too)? Does she even understand substance abuse and the many unaddressed systemic factors that can influence it? Or is the entire recovery process just shame based (because that works so well /s) combined with some more corny trust exercises? Why is this incredibly serious topic relegated to the background as if it's unimportant?

Recovery is hard. It is emotional and exhausting. Withdrawal (depending on what you're coming off of) can sometimes mean excruciating, unimaginable pain and in some cases people literally die. It is not a funny "ha-ha I take drugs because I'm chaotic and wild" quirk to be adored or glorified and it definitely should not be presented as something that can be wrapped up in a month or two off-screen without any development whatsoever. That's just insulting.

When you approach a topic like substance abuse and recovery, I personally feel you need to take in all sides of it. All the missteps that come with it (two steps forward one step back - mistakes are expected and okay), the self-loathing, the guilt and shame, the joy, the sense of freedom, the loss, and the best part of all: the incredibly difficult but liberating journey that is rebuilding your life and learning to love yourself and your body again, once you've chosen to be free and to live life.

Mad props to anyone who has ever battled this disease. You are strong, you are worth it and you are valued. Lol I am so sorry for going off here but I so appreciate you calling out the lack of exploration on this topic in the show. I guess I didn't even realize how annoyed and upset it was making me feel (praying this is coherent...).

This was absolutely coherent don’t worry!! Im really glad to see other people talking about this. I myself have not struggled with drug addiction but I have struggled with other kinds and as someone that studies a bunch of medical junk, I’d say I’m decently knowledgeable.

I’m mainly going to focus on Angel for this since he’s the main character I write for, but I assure you other characters addictions are also handled in my rewrite.

During the actual canon show, we don’t see Angel actually abusing substances that often; there’s a few times, most notably in episode 4, but from the rest of the show onward we hardly see anything. Yes in episode 6 they mentioned relapsing, which, mind you, was done horribly, but I digress. They touch on relapsing; Angel relapses, and then… what..??? What happened from that? I don’t feel upset or second hand guilt of any kind from this scene because we haven’t seen Angel’s attempts to stay sobre and off drugs.

His name is fucking Angel Dust. You don’t, I dunno, think that’d entail a higher dependency on drugs? Why do you think he named himself that?

About his name before anything else, the show has so much potential later on to talk about Angel picking out his drag name and why he chose that specifically. So much potential to explore how he views drugs and himself. He sees them as an escape and something “fun” to take his mind off of his actual life. When you die in a fucking coma and wake up in hell as a spider you’re going to want an escape. You will want to ignore reality. I am fully convinced Angel picked his name once he started performing because thats what he needed at the time. He needs to be like that to survive in hell. Angel is an incredibly mentally ill, troubled, traumatised, and unstable person, and being surrounded by so much intense negative influence only amplifies his current problems. I don’t mean to drag Vox in here but in my last redesign post I mentioned how very mildly bad people can become even worse people in hell because of the environment and this is no different for Angel. He’s been surrounded by crime and drugs his entire life and unable to live comfortably because of his sexuality. He has very likely been struggling with substances since he was a teen. Possibly even younger. He is not going to suddenly get over his addiction because of something like this. It could pave the way to him looking into dealing with it, but things like this can take years. I don’t remember when my addiction started; I’ve been clean for 2 1/2 years now I think, but the amount of relapsing and anguish I experienced while working towards that isn’t something that can be done in a few days or months. I still struggle with feeling like I deserve to say I’m recovering.

I’m hoping they tactfully handle this as they should, but my hopes are low. It’s okay to show a character relapsing. It’s okay to show a character feeling guilty. What matters is that the struggle is there to signify they’re trying. For a character with a song called “Addict” you really don’t see much of it. Drug and alcohol addiction is not a silly thing to just twiddle your fingers with and be like “well I guess thats over!” It’s incredibly insensitive to do so.

Whenever I write about Angel’s struggles with addictions, I focus on how small they can feel until you realise what’s actually happening. Just me talking about my rewrite again, but to get my ideas out here: Angel smokes often. He smokes at the studio when he’s stressed, he smokes at the hotel when he’s stressed, he smokes at in alleyways when he’s bored, there’s almost no location he won’t, but sometimes he tries to smoke less. His lungs aren’t the same as humans and technically he has 2 pairs of lungs, but smoking causes him to cough. This is painful in general and especially painful for Angel since he has barbs going down the back of his throat. Imagine choking on sandpaper, kind of like that. It’s painful, he doesn’t like the sound, Fat Nuggets REALLY doesn’t like the sound, and it’s an overall inconvenience, so he tries to stop smoking as much. Periods like this usually go fine for him until the stress returns or he starts to feel the withdrawal. Withdrawal from any sort of addiction is terrible, and in Angel’s case, just from not smoking it worsens his mental state further. He becomes irritable and stressed and that stress leads to wanting to smoke again to calm down. He may resist a few times and those times should be praised, but he gives in eventually. One cigarette to calm down becomes two, then three, and before he can process himself getting carried away, the entire pack is gone. It’s things like this that make addiction horrible. It’s something that deeply scared me when I was struggling. When I was struggling I was still in the mindset of “I can stop when I want to” and then being so suddenly hit in the face with the realisation that I’m not longer in control of this is terrifying. I could not stop when I wanted to. There were even points where I didn’t want to stop. Even just getting the smallest glimpse of this in an incredibly serious manner with Angel Dust would surprise me. To think the bar is this low on a show that seemingly prides itself on tackling such sensitive topics like you said is appalling. Your show shouldn’t have to be told how to write itself.

[bitwynn]

so i was talking with my friend abt like-- genshin lore and it got to the subject of forbidden knowledge and stuff

and she used this analogy of it being a computer virus or a corrupted file that cant be processed properly

which then made me think "ahaha yes SAGAU IDEA--"

so what if... the forbidden knowledge was the fact that the world is a game/simulation? and since the world of genshin is a computer program, it wasnt built to handle the realization of the nature of its existence and like-- processed it as eleazar, and "forbidden knowledge" and its other effects on the world

eleazar is the system like-- turning it into the safest thing the program can handle and leaving it to the gods (rukk and desh) to try and fully put a stop to it like anti-virus-- the program is only running the world, not the beings and people in it, so itd make sense for them to stop it since when the world is ending and you can do something about it, youd probably do something about it--

since rukk and desh were gods and therefore much "closer" to the games code/programming (closer in the sense that they were much more directly tied/connected to it-- esp rukkha because of irminsul), they were able to handle the realization in a sense-- like... they knew that they werent "real" in some sense and knew that this knowledge is slowly killing them and their deaths to the knowledge that "they werent real" is inevitable and that-- in a way, the eleazar is one of the safest ways for people to handle the knowledge-- that even the world is protecting them from the ruin of it

i imagine the way the two gods processed the information was like-- thru the "corruptive qualities of forbidden knowledge" and in fragmented parts. its why i said that they only knew that they werent "real" and not that they knew that theyre a video game world-- kind of in the same vein of practically every harbinger going "the sky is fake let me tell you about it" (proceeds to not tell you about it) (dottore i love you but im still mad about it)

but if the "forbidden knowledge" is knowledge about how youre not real because youre a video game and youre not supposed to be self aware of it, how then can the harbingers handle that information without going mad or constantly dying of eleazar? i mean-- in the both the manga and in the game its pretty explicitly said that like, dottore fully stopped colleis eleazar and practically cured her of it.

so... you know how they manage to keep altered information in the form of stories in scaramouches archon quest? i think a similar case happened here-- an allegorical story about people living in a fake reality, be it a dream or a story or something, was made to preserve this information. and since it wasnt the pure unadulterated truth about the nature of this worlds existence anymore, the program could handle it and keep anyone from reading it suffering the negative effects of forbidden knowledge

pierro probably did it tbh-- in the archon quest, it was said that the events of khaenriah and the events leading to the deaths of king deshret and rukkhadevata are similar, if not exactly the same.

so how can we then tie this into SAGAU? are you still with me? did you completely forget that this is about me bullshitting the games lore so much to fit this really specific genre of genshin fandom stuff so you can make content about it? have you forgotten i write SAGAU fics? ...honestly i cant blame you for that last one if you did, i havent been writing SAGAU fic in a WHILE LMAO

ANYWAYS--

the concept of "forbidden knowledge" being used in SAGAU is really interesting which is why im writing abt it in the first place lmao-- and the concept is uber fun so this is just me helping you fit this into your own fics and fanworks

since the "forbidden knowledge" is literally just like "youre a computer program and youre not supposed to know that", y/n would DEFINITELY be able to handle it without the adverse effects. and i know that y/n is basically the equivalent of a mary sue at this point and it physically hurted me when i started writing y/n fics but-- if you think abt it, it makes sense

i am trying so hard rn to like-- not turn this into a discussion about mary sues-- just watch OSPs video on the subject and youre golden lmao

it makes sense for y/n to be able to handle it because number one: y/n is literally us. y/n is not lines of code in a program. y/n is never supposed to end up inside a program or software, and is DEFINITELY SUPER AWARE OF THE FACT THAT GENSHIN IS NOT REAL.

y/n is a human, or at least was a human before they got isekaied or whatever plot thing you decide to do to put y/n in the genshi world. y/n is human, not programming and can definitely handle the thought of "youre not real, youre a game". (lmao it could also really make for some good introspection and/or angst moments where they could philosophize about themselves now that theyre in the game, and the nature of pataphysics and all that fun stuff lmao)

i feel like-- you could also use this as like, a sort of leverage thing? to prove that you are who you say you are and, if this is impostor au, you could use it to your advantage as well in more aggressive ways-- not just as a "prove that youre the one above us all" situation but as a sort of self defence thing-- like when scara and dottore were both talking about the sky being fake thing

obviously youd be immune to eleazar and the madness of the forbidden knowledge caps and the other adverse effects-- BUT you could also inflict those things to the people and the world around you. while other characters like the fatui and the gods could say "youre fake, the world isnt real", they wont inflict the bad stuff since its like they heard the info from a friend of a friend of a friend-- the knowledge has been filtered and purified and fragmented so much that it wont do anything-- its not the full unadulterated truth

but when y/n says it, thats when it inflicts the adverse effects. its the difference between knowing something happened because you were there when it happened and witnessed it, and knowing something happened because you heard it happen from a friend who found out thru the internet. y/n fully knows the truth and intricacies of that statement on so many different levels than the characters can comprehend which is why they can do that.

i feel like it could depend with the volume and amount of people that heard-- like, if you scream it and a whole crowd hears you, the ones closest to you suffer the worst cases of eleazar ever recorded or EVEN DIE, and the severity just decreases the further it gets away from you. itd also be an instant withering zone or become something like the mud from the chasm

i also wanna say that you can "control" the spread in a way but like-- i dont see a way of making that happen tbh. if youre reading this and are getting inspo, go wild babes-- i believe in you, but i personally dont believe that y/n can control it. using the "computer virus" analogy, youd probably have to go into the essence of Teyvat itself to "delete that information" similarly to irminsul but different in the sense of like-- irminsul only put it in the recycle bin but youre going in the recycle bin, selecting all instances and deleting it. maybe you can bullshit it via leylines and abyss mage drops since they carry around leyline branches but i personally think that you just spew out forbidden knowledge, and have to go to irminsul itself to delete it

but yeah! thats my thoughs on Forbidden Knowledge in SAGAU and how it could fit into the world of the AU! making this actually like-- inspired me a bit to write again lmao-- theres just like, so many cool ass concepts in genshin that i dont see in this AU (probably because i havent been there in a while ;vjklldxfg) and i really hope you guys get inspired too :))

[toulouse21]

REASONS WHY I KIN LUZ NOCEDA SO MUCH (and maybe you do too, just didn't realize it)

(from minor things until deep things)

- first of all she is a huge geek nerd that likes cosplay and anime, like the main audience of this show

- spontaneous and easily excited with anything

- her friends probably call her "the sun of the group"

- latina

- she likes otters!

- she loves shipping

- gay panicks to all the genders

- she likes fantasy books with complicated side stories

- she became a writer at the end of the show

- a simp.

- she falls in love with a cute witch with colorfoul hair, honestly who wouldn't?

- Luz uses fiction to scape reality, and that's like SO OBVIOUS that even her must realize it too, but if you notice it, at human realm that is what keep her going without drowning in a possible depression. She had no friends there, she had nothing other than her mother (wich she was very lucky to be an amazing one) and her fantasy books. Yeah she probably knew her obssesion with fiction was too much, but she had no other thing to focus

- I think the owl house was the only piece of media I ever seen that pictured the feeling of "growing up as the weird kid" so perfectly. Generally the main characther is a nerd who has no friends and is bullied, but it never has a reason for them to not have any friends (not a reason like "oh they are so irritanting, that's why they don't have any friends", no, a reason like "they are seen as weird because they are VERY different from the rest of school, wich scare people away, and that's why they don't have any friends. It's not their fault at all". The second case is literally luz' case).

You see, Luz always had so much imagination, and she tried to show it the most she could to other people, I think she did it because she thought "Im gonna be myself, and someone will like me.... Probably". That scene in third season, of Camila remembering things, when little Luz shows the snake's pajamas to the other kids, she clearly did that because it was a subject she was SO interested in, she wanted to share it with the other children, they would find it interesting too and would want to be her friends, right? And then the kids ran away screaming, and she didn't get why

- When Camila wanted to send her to that camp, oh my titan my girl was so sad. When she dropped azura's book on trash, honestly I think that was so.... Meaningful. That book is so important to her, obviously because it was her father's gift, BUT it's even more than that, it's the whole symbol of her personality, the one little thing she loves so much, she stayed on boiling isles only to have a chance to live something slightly similar to what she always dreamed with.

When she throws Azura on the trash in front of Camila she is basically saying "don't worry mom, I will finally stop. I will stop trying to make friends by being what I am, because that clearly didn't and will never work out. I am going to throw all that I am away, so I can be normal like everybody wants". Getting Azura back isn't JUST for the plot, it symbolizes how Luz isn't ready to gave up from herself yet.

- In boiling isles Luz feels like she is in home, we all know that, but if you look closer, you will see it was there she become a people pleaser. In my interpretation, Luz is so happy she finally find a place where she has friends, a second mother figure, a brother figure, and people LIKE her (well most of them, except for bosha and stuff), she is so not used to it, she doesn't know what to do. People liking her so much as she likes them is so perfect she wants to do anything to not change that, that's why she sacrifices herself in a lot of situations in a lot of different ways for the people she loves.

If you dont think she is a people pleaser, let me remind you: when she made Amity loose her job at the library, Luz came back to there, faced all the challenges that creepy boss had for her, just to get Amity's card back. Eda told her explicity to not do any mess with the house while she was out, but Luz invited Gus and Willow to there anyway, only because Willow was too excited about that moon ritual, she prefers face the consequences of desobbeing eda than make her new friends slightly disappointed (probably because she thinks that if she commits any mistake, they will abandon her).

- In my point of view, her obssesion in befriending every enemy that crosses her also relates with the fact she is a people pleaser. I can be projecting (like all the rest of this text lol), but I have a strange wish that everyone on earth likes me, not only the people I like, but also the people I hate, I want everyone to find me at least a little nice or else Im not happy. Wich means I am never truly happy, because that is Impossible to happen

For what Im concerned, people pleasers think like that generally, so Luz probably thinks like that too

- Ok the puppet scene of the third season, I saw a lot of people joking with "Luz realized that wasn't amity because she wasn't autistic enough lollll", yes I know, but that scene is so deep for me oh lord. Her worst fear is to be abandoned by her friends, the people she would die for, when she sees it happening in front of her, she doesn't even think "wait this looks weird, this doesn't look like my friends at all...", no, her head doesn't even suggest that, because in Luz' mind, that scenario it's what she deserves, the "weird" situation is the actual reality, where none of her friends hate her, she doesn't understand why they don't.

Luz realized they were all puppets because Amity mistoke an Azura's quote, not because all that incredible people were being mean to her, because she thinks she doesn't deserve any of them.

- Also in third season, my favourite scene of all time, the one that made me cry, when I heard Luz saying that, I finally realized what I needed this whole time: "The only thing I've ever really wanted.... Was to be understood"

(YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH THIS TOUCHED ME, SERIOUSLY, AHHWHWHWHAIAJAHAHAHQBWH)

This quote is SO SO SO SO SO MEANINGFUL, OH MY TITAN. Not even Luz understood herself, do you guys get that? She didn't know why she just couldn't be normal like all the other kids on school, she didn't understand why she insisted so much on being herself when all that did was to cause her suffering. But when Camila said "my biggest mistake was trying to change you", she finally realized why she never gave up of herself: because there was nothing wrong with her.

She is not a bad person, she is nothing like belos or whoever, she deserves to receive as much as she offers to everyone, she doesn't need to think inside the box, she can continue to be weird forever and there is nothing wrong with that. For us that's all pretty obvious, but for her it's like a dream that came true to finally realize that.

The main reason why this cartoon is my favourite is because of Luz. I feel really connected to her (if that makes sense), that's why Im so obsessed with her. At the finale, she ends up capable of balancing her "boring life" of human realm with boiling isles, that makes me fill up with hope that maybe one day I find happiness at my "boring life" in here, while balancing it with fiction in a healthy way.

Luz is the best main characther of all time and I will never be convinced otherwise.

[dozingzzz]

these are @robbie-lee-zombie 's tickle questions! (sorry for the tag! ik you dont know me haha)

i thought id answer them because why not! also its a fun way for yall to get to know how i am tickle-wise since my blog is so new ☺️

1. What’s your favorite tickle tool?

honestly, just hands. but feathers and paint/makeup brushes are fun too. i just dont like the harsh/scratchy ones

2. Favorite Ler? (Tag them if you dare~)

im not super close with really anyone on here just yet, (totally feel free to change that, send me a dm lets be friends!!) so im not sure! i dont wanna tag someone i hardly know lol

3. Favorite Lee? (Tag them to call them out~)

same as #2!

4. Opinion on blindfolds/restraints? Why or why not?

not really my thing! they scare me like a lot haha. like im okay with maybeee my arms up or being pinned if i trust someone, but that's as far as ill go.

as a ler, ill pin a lee if they want it, but big bondage is still not my style. whatever the lee prefers other than that ☺️

5. A spot that gets you squealing?

this question is so cruel 🥲

lower back n back ribs

6. How long do you estimate you could last before calling mercy?

not sure. ive never been tickled for an extended period of time before, but id estimate maybe 2 minutes? before I need a break.

7. Ever have tickle fantasies?

if "fantasies" is being used non-sexually in this case, absolutely. haha i think about lots of cute little scenarios of either me tickling someone or them getting me.

8. Why did you make your tickle blog?

ive had a few before this that i abandoned, and have lurked for like 2 years since my last one, but i joined again because i love interacting with this community and having tickle friends makes me soo happy

(again, dm me!! id love to be friends)

9. Does anyone irl know of your interests?

nope! farr, far too scared haha

10. Can you say the t-word?

i think i can, ive never actually said it in front of anyone before because it never comes up, but like ive said it just fine sitting in my room or while reading aloud

11. Verbal teases, yes or no and why?

depends. some of the stuff i see is awkward and corny, i guess i would have to really experience it myself because most of what i see online doesn't appeal to me. im not sure if that would change if it was an actual interaction haha

this also is the reason i dont rp online as a lee, because its just awkward to me lol. i dont actually feel anything lol 😭

12. Upper body tickles or lower body tickles?

i like both, but probably upper body if i had to choose.

no, definitely not because my belly and back are there shush

13. Neck or ear tickles?

i dont think my ears are very ticklish, so probably neck tickles haha

14. Pinned on your back, or your stomach?

i dont think i could choose haha both make a bad spot super vulnerable 🥲

15. What do you love about the lees you know?

they're SO tooth-rottingly adorable oh my goddess. they make me wanna hold them in my lap and just gently tickle them silly you literal cutie pies.

16. What do you love about the lers you know?

one, they're also so adorable, and two, they're so nice about tickles 🥲 they make me feel so safe and nice

17. Feathers or Paint Brushes?

this question.. 🥲

i dont think i could choose i love them both

18. How long have you known about your interests in the community?

since i was young, like maybe 7-8 years old, i had that feeling about and fixation on tickling, and thats also when i became a little scared and very shy about the subject on top of being a very reserved child, and only just secretly watched yt tickle compilations in my bedroom. i didn't find out about the community until i was more like 11-12. it was huge to me since i thought i was just.. weird haha, and while i was very dumb and didn't put up proper boundaries, i engaged with tickle content for a while. when i was 14, i believe, i had this like year-long phase where i wanted to not be like that anymore, deleted tumblr, and tried to completely push it out of my life but surprise surprise haha! at 15, i started lurking again and here i am now at 17 with my current blog!

19. What’s your favorite way to be tickled? (As in provoked, teased into asking, etc.)

surprise tickles or having someone straight up ask if they can tickle me would probably be my favorites because i feel its SO cute, and also doesnt involve me asking.. also the second one usually means gentler tickles like we're cuddling on the couch or something and those aaa are for sure my favorites

20. Are you/Do you like Polite Lees or Bratty Lees? (Asking for tickles vs Pissing someone off for tickles)

i love all lees because all of you are adorable and i will never say anything different, but someone coming up to me and asking for tickles will always hold a special place in my heart because AA its so incredibly cute it makes me so happy

i myself am a polite lee, im very shy irl in general and that kind of bleeds into how i am about tickles, so while it would take like a whole day of hyping myself up and figuring out how to ask and i would almost 100% chicken out, if i could ask i would. i don't like making people mad either haha

if you have any other tickle (or just normal!) questions you want my input on, my asks are open! ask away!!☺️

[kkbardd]

hi! popping in quickly.

I absolutely adore your artstyle and your ocs. their personalities and stories are always so interesting, and I look forward to seeing any type of art you post.

If you take a break from drawing asurei, that's completely okay!! doing things with joy is more important than just doing them. I will enjoy whatever you draw regardless— in fact, I regularly go back to that drawing of the unnamed pink haired girlfailure OC and her "friend" daily. i am mayhaps their number one fan.

please continue sharing your stories and ideas!! I adore your characters and designs so much. I am very excited for your toxic yuri freeloader/assassin story.. they are very interesting!!

also saw you did some dialogue in japanese.. do you speak it ? im quite interested in any language so.. apologies if this is off topic ><!

In any case, thank you for continuing to create. I love your art and hope you continue to draw what makes you happy and what you feel motivated to do. I love all your art regardless of subject matter!! in fact it convinced me to to start watching madoka magica :}

best wishes !! hope you're well!!

wahhh isopod !! u always send me the nicest asks when i need them most!! i hope ur doing well ~ although my last post sounded pretty depressing im actually doing pretty well too! im going to the aquarium next week w some friends so im looking forward to that more than anything >:D

I've been reading a lot of short yuri stories by Toyo Totan & Iwami Kiyoko lately and I'm excited to use that inspiration to improve some of my own OC stuff too! (I recommend 'Last Summer Vacation' !)

And yes I'm fluent in Japanese !! I'm actually an officer in my college's JP language community & I used to translate manga on the side !! I'm completely self-taught through videos though, so while my listening and speaking are fluent I actually suck at reading LOL I'm so bad that when I translated manga I'd use my camera's text to speech to do everything...

I'm a huge language nerd too! I watch a bunch of scientific videos/TED-Talks on how our brain learns languages and tips to learn things more efficiently! For example, apparently when you first start learning a language you should never try to speak it right off! If you try speaking before listening for a very long time, your brain just kinda solidifies your verbal pronunciation and it can have long-term effects on not only how you sound, but also how you HEAR sounds! This is also why some think that children learn languages better, because they spend a long time exposed to it while being non-verbal. I love this fact bc I kinda experienced it myself!

I spent about 2 years just watching JP translated videos of people speaking naturally (not videos aimed at foreigners, nor shows that have acting, more like vlog-type stuff!) and only started speaking when exposed to others who could speak it too ! Especially during COVID, I think I was pretty much spending ~80% of my day listening and thinking in Japanese so I was very immersed! And because of that, I'm a little famous in my community for having the best pronunciation 😤 Going to on a trip to Japan & translating for the people who went with me also boosted my confidence a lot! I'll never forget this guy at an izakaya who asked how many years I've been living in Osaka LOL ("three days actually!")

I think the biggest downside though is that once u learn another language, ur first language skills get bad.. i often think up half-sentences and sayings/metaphors in Jap that just sound wrong when you try to translate it back into Eng ;;; i sometimes trail off when i speaking because i forget the english word for certain things, but my friends are now just used to my weird metaphors so!

I went on such a long tangent!! But anyways!! Thank u for always sending me the sweetest asks, I always save them to my phone and I'm pretty sure all my friends know abt u bc I always show them the nice things u say 😭!! And yes!!! Madoka is so good, especially the movie so im excited ur gonna watch it!! I hope u like it!

and finally for their #1 fan <3 :

[inkdemonapologist]

Do you ever think about how Nathan Arch is canonically Joey’s sugar daddy?

YALL HAVE A WILD DEFINITION OF “CANONICALLY” SOMETIMES

What we know (assuming there's no exciting new nathan lore im gonna discover when i read FtB, in which case don't tell me lmao), canonically, is that Nathan gave Joey a lot of advice about starting his company, some more advice while JDS was running and looked over the land for the Bendyland park with him, and that when things got real bad for JDS, Joey wrote to Nathan, hemming and hawing about how he normally definitely wouldn’t do this, to ask for a specific amount of money to help with the bills. We also can assume he’s a little older than Joey, since they were in the military together when Joey was too young to be in the military. 

What is not hard AT ALL to read between the lines is that Nathan had a big crush on Joey Drew, source: every footnote in the Illusion of Living, several audiologs in BatDR. 

What is certainly possible to believe is that Joey would never mention if Nathan was giving him consistent financial support, and that Nathan would similarly gloss over it, because he likes the image of Joey as a clever self-made man who deserves his success and wants to preserve Joey’s good name. 

We actually don’t know if Nathan gave Joey any money, we just know that Joey asked for it, and that everything we know about Nathan suggests he would’ve been happy to help (and everything we know about Joey suggests he would’ve downplayed how much he really needed and thus the studio going under anyway does not mean Nathan ignored the request.) So it’s quite reasonable to suspect he did, but even THAT isn’t canon confirmed.

And, like, not to be That Guy except that this is my blog and I can That Guy to my heart’s content — giving someone money does not make you a sugar daddy. SUGAR DADDY IS A TRANSACTIONAL RELATIONSHIP and gay relations between Joey Drew and Nathan Arch are the realm of headcanon. LIKE, A HEADCANON THAT CAN BE VERY STRONGLY SUPPORTED AND ARGUED FOR, if someone told me "wow joey and nathan DEFINITELY had something going on" I would laugh and agree, but it's an interpretation nonetheless. You could make an equally strong argument that Nathan is closer to what the kids call a simp, praising Joey’s brilliance and helping him with his problems and eagerly paying his bills because of a huge unrequited crush that Joey took advantage of but never returned. There's several ways to read it. 

But... I do think a lot about how these two stayed in contact, stayed friends, even though Joey always seemed to be playing a role around Nathan, never quite felt comfortable explaining the things he felt most passionately about. He tells him about Bendyland, but clams up when Nathan doesn’t understand why it matters so much to him. It doesn’t seem like Joey ever tells him about Audrey; even though Nathan can hear the joy in his voice and notes that his old friend sounds more like himself than he has in a long time, he never knows why. Nathan is so so so taken with Joey, but there’s something about Nathan that Joey doesn’t trust. 

Interesting that Joey never does brag about Nathan investing in him as proof of his own business acumen, though he doesn’t mind bragging about the investment of a grief-stricken mother who only regarded him as a polite young man. What’s threatening, then, about the idea of Nathan supporting him? It’s interesting the way Nathan is fascinated with every part of him and Joey always holds himself at arm’s length. Interesting how Joey enjoys his company, but gets uncomfortable and changes the subject whenever Nathan regards him, positively, as someone who pulled himself up to success out of nothing. Interesting to compare Nathan to Kyle, the other rich friend of Joey's who gets called a “sugar daddy” by the fandom (despite being younger than Joey), how Joey is uncomfortable when Kyle prods him about his status and tries to take credit for him, and then the way Nathan doesn’t do this but Joey still shies away whenever he hits the edges of those topics. ...It’s almost more interesting if Joey was trying his absolute hardest to avoid Nathan funding him, despite the fact that Nathan was clearly taken with him and probably would have been happy to help. What strings were attached to Kyle that Joey was afraid to find in Nathan?

[cerealmonster15]

IM GOING TO TALK ABOUT ALHAITHAM AND KAVEH AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!

i love this fuckin argument kaveh and alhaitham have on the port ormos bulletin board

it's one of those instances where kaveh and alhaitham are arguing and alhaitham is saying that like, while he disagrees with kaveh lol, he also doesnt deny theres truth to what kaveh says.

but i also think it's funny how alhaitham is like "end of conversation. ALSO-" like bitch you kept going IMMEDIATELY fkjsjfklds and then that stupid bit where theyre like "he said this" "he did not fucking say that" "he did" "no he didnt fuck you" "he did give me a month ill prove it!!!!" THEYRE FIGHTING LIKE CHILDREN ON A PUBLIC MESSAGE BOARD😭😭😭

also i have this one bit stuck forever in my mind from kavehs hang out

[video source i screenshot from]

MAYBE im reading into it way too much bc i have terminal haikaveh brain. maybe. BUT!!!! art is subjective i can do what i want :^) anyway i think a lot about this part because TO ME it sounds like kaveh keeps assuming the worst from alhaitham - makes sense, they argue all the time and they def have a turbulent relationship. HOWEVER!!!!! while alhaitham does like poking fun at kaveh and gets annoyed with him dskjfdsklf i FEEL LIKE theres an implication that he like, does not enjoy seeing kaveh suffer the way kaveh just assumes he does.

like here, kaveh is like oh, youre not hoping to see me make a fool of myself are you >:(?? just bc alhaitham was like. in a location unexpectedly. lol. and then alhaithams phrasing is just so specific where he like, doesnt say yes but doesnt say no either lol. hes like "oh so you think i get joy from seeing you in pain day in and day out? well if that were true id be entertained always because youre always in distress"

but like. I DUNNO MAYBE IM BEING STUPID BUT JKSDLFJDKL to ME it felt like he was deflecting the question. to be fair it was a silly question so maybe alhaitham didnt think it worth answering lololol but like "are you here to watch me struggle" "why do you assume i enjoy you struggling" is the vibe i get. but then with bullying also bc alhaitham is still poking at him and his distresses lol jdkslfdskl

and then like the moment the traveler is about to be like "kavehs feeling sad" and kaveh tries to deflect it, i personally think alhaitham managed to come up with a distraction to get kaveh to walk away for a minute so he could hear about kavehs troubles bc hes IMMEDIATELY LIKE

ok now that hes gone tell me about kaveh and his issues. and then goes on to explain kaveh and his behavior

and there are SEVERAL INSTANCES i mean this is an obvious thing lol but like, many such cases where kaveh and alhaitham will be like "yeah this guy is incredibly smart but his personality is fucking unbearable" i just enjoy that as much as they rag on each other theyre still like "no he is a genius though im not gonna deny that" AND ALSO [help]

alhaitham says stuff like this a few times, i think hes got a teapot line or so where he says similar things 🤔 but hes like "yeah people go about their lives doing different things and thats fine everyone should stay in their lane as long as theyre not disrupting the lives of others" AND YET!!!!!!!!!!!! he and kaveh endlessly fight with each other on how they go about their lives. trying to get the other to see their way of thinking even though i think they both acknowledge [or it says somewhere in the lore that they do] that it is a losing battle bc theyre both really set in how they see things and their methods of doing things. I JUST FIND IT REALLY INTERESTING that alhaitham is like, "mind your business and ill mind my business what ever bye" but when it comes to kaveh hes like. no actually i have to debate you. the way you feel isnt wrong however your actions make your life really hard for yourself and you could be living better if you changed" like he cannot stay in his lane when kaveh is involved!!!!! and like the whole reason he's even IN the parade of providence event at all was bc he was pursuing a thread of research that he figured out was connected to kavehs dad and his disappearance!!! mister "i dont want to get involved if it doesnt disrupt my life" got involved to give his boy some closure on the haunting of his dead father!!!!!!!!!! I am going to explode now goodbye!!!!

[starkjoy]

it’s insane how disappointed i am with this season… like i don’t even know how to deal w this lmao. i just feel like i’m being gaslit into believing all the stuff i previously thought about tomshiv’s dynamic and even tomgreg’s (in terms of the nero/sporus subtext) isn’t true. it’s a weird decision on the writers’ parts.

the whiplash is so odd to me that i can’t help but wonder if they’re intentionally misleading us for some late-in-the-game twist. that’s probably delusion though—simplest explanation is that they changed their mind or it’s shitty writing. seems to be a trend with hbo final seasons. let’s see how it all ends before we make any final decisions, though.

unlike failed internet darling mlm ships of the past, tomgreg isn’t a case of fandom creating a narrative and setting themselves up for disappointment—the writers intentionally implanted homoeroticism into their plotline. the actors knowingly played around with it. jesse literally called them homoerotic a few weeks ago. it’s really sad to think succession may fall prey to every other queerbait-adjacent (adjacent for now since the season isn’t over) curse, leaning into the queer undertones until they’ve written themselves into a gay corner with the internet convinced something is gonna happen, only to backtrack and pretend the vibes were never there at all. it’s too early to say if that’s the case here, but it certainly feels that way at the moment. i mean, what else are we supposed to think when the writers go from nero and sporus gay marriage as the through line of season 3, to disgusting brothers hetero sex tour comedic relief background noise with tomshiv redemption front end center? am I supposed to be enjoying this?

all that being said, on a positive note im glad we’ve seen how much closer tom and greg have gotten as partners, and that they’re scheming together and on the same page. i’m glad they’ve had at least one interaction each episode. i’m glad greg seems much more into tom than previous seasons, quelling any unrequited friendship accusations. i’m glad we got insane homoerotic undertones in episode 1, even if they’ve dropped off since then. but where we’re sadly lacking is depth—what was once the hallmark of tomgreg’s deeper connection in contrast to tomshiv’s emotional constipation. now greg makes sexual quips while tom rolls his eyes…end scene. and again. it was funny and cute at first, but now it’s getting boring. don’t they deserve a more interesting arc in the final season after years of build up? why are we subject to tomshiv rehashing the same shit we’ve seen for 3 seasons instead?

also, one of the most compelling arcs of season 3 was tom’s vengeance, especially because we saw it play out from his perspective. outside of his plane convo with greg, tom’s pov has all but been erased. even the tomshiv moments are from the lens of shiv’s experience. and as much as we may sympathize with shiv’s heartbreak over his betrayal and her dad’s death, it feels almost wrong that the show is trying to make me feel bad for her? we saw how awful she was to tom for three seasons, we saw from tom’s perspective how much she hurt him. i don’t feel bad for shiv on the tom front at all, the fact that she kept his baby feels wildly out of character, and frankly it’s a little insulting the amount of time the final season is spending trying to convince the audience otherwise.

hey, maybe my feelings will change in a few days. maybe the final episodes will change all of our minds. i’ll always have some hope for tomgreg, but right now it’s not looking promising given the treatment they’ve received so far. anyone with any positivity to share hit me up because I could use it!!

[sanjisblackasswife]

(NSFW) “He Watches Us” Part 2 Sanji x Black Fem Reader

First part here.

Bad Summary: You and Your Captain always had a close bond…a little too close and your boyfriend Sanji notices this and confronts you about it, but as you two make up Luffy sits behind the shadow and watch.

CW: Uhhhh…kinda the same as last time except it’s sex in a bath tub.

“You..wanna sleep with me?” You cocked your head a little unsure if that’s what your captain actually asked. It was odd because his questions are usually very confident and to the point but now it’s almost as if he’s embarrassed.?

“OF COURSE YOU CAN’T SLEEP WITH HER ANYMORE I SLEEP WITH HER!” Sanji growled in Luffy’s face nearly ready to kick him again. You laughed lightly and sit back as they argued a little.

You and Luffy actually had a very…touchy friendship before you and Sanji came in the picture. It was always platonic between you both, but so many thought otherwise.

You’d let Luffy cuddle you when taking a nap, you’d let him lay on top of you when he’s tired, you both slept in the same bed together a lot, hell you both have even taken baths together and due to this Sanji never really pursued you like he wanted because he believed you were more interested in Luffy, but that wasn’t the case at all.

You never really minded being nude around Luffy, or anything because he was probably the only guy in the world you could trust back then to be completely vulnerable with. Even a few times you’ve caught Zoro staring at your body, but never Luffy.

HE WAS LUFFY!

So being touchy feels with him wasnt an issue you thought, but that was until Sanji out right told you he was uncomfortable with how your behavior was with their captain when you both got together so you stopped the baths, cuddling, and even sleeping together.

“WHY CANT I SLEEP WITH Y/N YOU HAVE YOUR OWN ROOM ANYWAYS!?” Luffy and Sanji’s face were so close you could swear one wrong move and they’d kiss.

“BECAUSE SHE’S MY WOMAN AND I CAN SLEEP WITH HER IF I WANT—“

“YOU BOTH DON’T EVEN SLEEP TOGETHER YOU GUYS JUST HAVE SEX!”

The tension was now replaced with embarrassment filling your face as your eyes widen.

Sanji’s grumbles off to attend to his cooking with his cheek dusted in pink. Luffy pouts crossing his arms to sit beside you, but you felt so uneasy now.

“How um….how you know that?” You tried masking your embarrassment with a faint chuckle.

Luffy just shrugs. He rather not tell you he watched you both have sex last night and just want to forget he even asked.

“Well um…Luffy remember I told you we can’t sleep together like we used to anymore…im with Sanji. So—“

“But you guys don’t even sleep. Once you both are done I can sleep with y—“

“YOU CANNOT SLEEP WITH Y/N!” Sanji yelled slamming his spoon down growing tired of hearing you both say “Sleeping together.”

It irked him.

“Sanji and I do sleep…in the same bed …after um…after having sex so..you can’t.”

You pat his head as he side eyes you with a small pout around the lips. “You okay?”

“Yeah…” Luffy hoped you aren’t going to ask how he knows again. He didn’t even want y’all to know he knew, but it kind of slipped out. You continued to apologize if your captain ever heard or seen anything, but Luffy just laughed it off to change the subject.

He didn’t mind it.

He just wanted to see more of it which is why he asked to be in your room tonight.

Luffy didn’t know nor understand that sex between two people is typically a private thing. You’re not supposed to just go around having sex in front of people (unless that’s like your job or something), he just seen it as social activity, but the amount of embarrassment Luffy felt watching he probably had a faint idea of you having sex wasn’t supposed to be seen.

But OBVIOUSLY to Luffy if you didn’t want him to watch your door wouldn’t have been unlocked!

So no harm no foul right?

Later that night, everybody has gone to bed or on the watch tower so it was time for you and Sanji to take a late night bath together, but as you’re laying in between Sanji’s legs playing with the rings in his hands, you felt relaxed in the water but you knew he wasn’t.

Sanji began to mumble words in French and so that’s how you knew he had to be upset about something.

“What’s wrong pretty boy?” You asked moving your wet curls out of your face but still looking at Sanji’s pretty hands. “Why you so mad?”

“I…” Sanji was hesitant with his words. He knew he wanted to speak on what’s been bothering him, but he was afraid of getting into an argument with you. “I just—..oh.”

You turn to face him and lean your body over a bit to where he is now having to look up at you. The bubbles he put in there for you started to slowly slide off your breast teasingly nearly exposing your erect nipples to the cool air and Sanji’s hot mouth. His cigarette nearly fell out of his mouth until he quickly caught it back with his tongue, his nose threatening to bleed with his face as red as an apple.

“What’s…” You kiss his forehead cupping his cheeks. “Wrong.” Another kiss to his nose before your thumbs rub his stubled face and leaving a bit of bubbles on his face from your hands. Sanji felt so weak against you, your pretty body kneeling so close to his and to being wrapped around him and how he can only see your pretty teeth since your eyes were covered by your fro.

Sanji knew you’d never cheat, you and him shared so much about y’all past to each other he would rather die than assume you’d do such a thing, same goes for his captain , but you and Luffy’s relationship always worried him just a tad.

“I…are you and Luffy..still…”

You wanted to get mad, you really did but you automatically sighed before resting your forehead on his. You knew Sanji had his insecurities so you knew what you’d have to put up with when he had his fits.

Kissing his curly brow you lowered yourself so you’re eye to eye with Sanji. You take his cigarette and put it out which is something you rarely do but it’s usually only when you’re about to speak to him seriously.

“Luffy and I never had anything. He’s my friend, our captain, that’s it. We never had feelings for each other but I always did feel close to him. You should never worry about him sweetheart or any guy for that matter because it’s YOU that I want….you’re mine Sanji…all mine.” Your words were as sincere as they could be looking into his pretty blueish eyes. They were in complete awe looking at you so close they turned into little hearts, with a tint of lust as he lowered his lids. He knew you meant it, he just likes to hear the confirmation every once in a while.

“Now…” you adjusted yourself on top of his lap, legs spread with the help of Sanji’s strong thighs and now grabbing his semi hard dick to slowly stroke and whisper in his ear, “Why don’t you show me how much I’m yours….please.”

His nose began to trickle out some blood which you were used to so you giggle and quickly wiped it with the wash cloth still slowly stroking his cock, thumb applying pressure on the tip making Sanji hiss with pleasure as his head was thrown back.

He moaned softly as you peppered his neck with kisses moving up and down, bucking into your hand for harder friction, you then had to stop since he was squirming so much and held him still by his shoulders.

“I don’t think the water is enough to prep me for your cock, pretty boy.” You slowly rose up not breaking eye contact with your soapy pussy now eye to eye with Sanji. You grabbed the other wash cloth and rinsed out the water from the towel to fall down you pretty lips and clear it of any soapy bubbles.

Sanji licked his lips at the sight and how pretty your pussy was being revealed to him. He looked back up at you with a flustered face before sticking out his long tongue to give you a long lick. You shivered at the contact making Sanji moan inside you throwing your leg on his shoulder and one hand cupping your ass. You knew he’d never let you fall as he sucked at licked inside you, but you leaned your body on the cold wall of the steamy room for extra support.

“Sanjiiiii…” you clenched around the two fingers he added inside you scissoring you lapping your cunt like he was trying to milk it. “Riiiiiight th—-“

You ended up choking on your words feeling a new presence beside you. You turn your head the opposite way still leaning on the wall to see a familiar shadow from the bathroom door window. You couldn’t see clearly since your hair was in the way but you knew who it was exactly who it was.

And honestly it turned you on a little bit.

You knew it was wrong, but you managed to catch a glance of your Captain watching from the window and his eyes weren’t even alert as they usually were, they were lowered and dazed almost as if he were unfocused at what he was staring at.

Your thoughts were cut short when you felt Sanji nibble at your inner thigh.

“What’s wrong?” He asked in a slight pant. You knew if you told him Luffy was looking he’d probably stop everything and beat your captain to death so you just shook your head pressing your pelvis closer to his face.

Sanji smirked and finished what he started.

“That’s…so…uh…”

Luffy began to moan softly with one hand in his pants and the other fondling his balls. He shouldn’t be doing this.

He shouldn’t be watching his friends have sex. Let alone touching himself to it, but he was moreso focused on you and your faces. They looked so hot.

This was completely out of character for Luffy which is why he felt off doing it, but after hearing you whisper to Sanji to take a bath with him tonight during dinner it was almost as if you WANTED Luffy to watch.

“Common..Go inside her already!”

Luffy thought to himself seeing you standing in the tub riding Sanji’s face. It was so lewd how you were acting; you back was arch, head thrown back with your chest and hands on the wall. If Sanji wasn’t holding you you’d definitely be falling backwards by now.

Your leg began to twitch, your mouth started to gape out as you began to buck your hips a bit faster in your pretty boy’s face. His beard now soaked from your arousal and tickling your pussy he sucked harder.

“YES SAAANNJ—!!” You didn’t even have time to ride out your high as you came when your favorite Blondie grabbed your hips to push you back a little so he can get up and bend you over the tub.

“Need you!” Sanji groaned after growing so impatient and slapped his cock on the back of your clit making you hiss.

You still Seen Luffy’s eyes on you both. You’d think it would look creepy, but he had a very tired look on his face, granted though you couldn’t see his whole face.

“Wait wait baby….” You moaned out, your boyfriend stopped rubbing his cock against you and looked over your shoulder. “I want you to be rough with me…please. Make me yours…”

You wasn’t really sure if your idea was ganna help or worsen the situation but you wanted Luffy and more importantly Sanji to know that your body is his and only his for the taking.

With a warm smile, he bent down to suck and kiss on your plump lips and smiled against them before saying;

“Anything for you mademoiselle.”

His cold lips touched your spine making you arch further, his cock was painfully hard and ready to go inside, Sanji used one hand to grip your hip and the other rubbed against your worn slit before sliding in.

“Finally.”

Luffy thought, he started to stroke his own cock at a similar pace of Sanji’s strokes. It didn’t take long before his thrust began to knock the wind out of you.

The lower vein Sanji had under his dick was gliding so deliciously in your gummy walls you began to feel tears forming.

“Say it.” Was all you heard Sanji strangle to say gripping with both hands on your hips and eyes focused on how your ass jiggles on his cock.

“S-say..what…?” You moaned, and then grunted lowly as he gripped your hair still thrusting inside you pulling you back so the side of your face can reach his mouth.

“Say I’m the best and only man to make you feel this good.”

“Y—Sanji y—AH!”

Sanji let his back hit the cold wall and he started to thrust upwards and fuck you standing. His hand let go of you hair and reached to your clit rubbing messy circles and the other hand lifted your thigh for easier access.

“Say it.”

“Sanji babyyyyy..!” The pace was getting unforgiving now, almost as if he were trying to prove a point that nobody could even see to be proven.

Except to Luffy.

“Sanji You’re the best!! Yes! You’re the only one to make me feel this good only you! Only you!” This new position felt so painful, but so good. Water was more on the floor than it now was in the tub.

The cook pulled out of you for a second to change positions and lift you up against the wall now.

“I’m really the best?” His eyes not leaving yours and filled with so much innocence despite pushing his dick deep inside you. You felt light headed with all the steam and sweat your both managed to produce in a few minutes. Your eyes flew uneven and your mouth gaped making Sanji chuckle a little before finishing his pace.

“You’re..the best…” You whispered out in between thrust. He was fucking up into you on the slippery wall making you dig into his strong shoulders as he sucked your neck

Your praises kept Sanji to keep thrusting while holding you up by your ass. You nearly forgot Luffy was even there but you looked back up from Sanji’s shoulder and seen Luffy’s eyes now wide and open watching you both.

Luffy and you made eye contact and he quickly moved away from the window, heart beating and now stained underwear and pants. He felt a bit of guilt..and possibly envy? Luffy wasn’t sure, but now after hearing you give Sanji that kinda praise he didn’t really want to watch anymore. He sighed picking up his hat and heading back to his room.

You and Sanji kept going for a few more minutes cumming twice in the process. He still held you up after stopping with his head buried in your neck as you both catch your breaths.

“Sanj..I—.”

“Is he gone?” He looks back at the door to see nobody there. You look back at your lover as he walks you over to the counter, slowly pulls out, and wraps a robe around you and a towel over himself. “Good.”

“…You knew?”

“I knew he was watching us…” Sanji grumbled pushing his hair back for a moment giving your a glimpse of both of his eyes. “I know he was watching us but…if he does it doesn’t matter…because he’ll never get the real thing. Not if he wants his ass kicked.”

“You’re not mad?”

“I was at first but seeing you…and you telling me I’m the only one…I …got over it…”

He pouted in your shoulder and rose his head up to give you a short lived kiss “You okay? I didnt hurt—“

Your arms were thrown over his shoulders, reaching your tongue down his throat and gripping his wet hair, your boyfriend got in between your legs and rubbed them softly with his thumbs moaning lightly in your mouth. Something about Sanji being so protective over you turned you on so much.

“I love you, Ji….”

“I love you too…and these peeping toms out here.” You both chuckle as Sanji picks you up and heads back to your room for the night to cuddle.

“I guess we have to perverts on the ship.” You smiled in Sanji’s neck.

“Yeah….wait hey!”

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

i love when the subject of modern au for the arcana comes up cause my only metric of judgement for it is What are you gonna do with Muriel. is he still. you know. practically homeless

cause it can be done well i believe it!! but i mean its interesting to me cause theres so many um. cultural differences i guess i can call it, and ramifications and implications and fucking more thesaurus words we get it to consider in comparing our "everyone has to have a document about *Everything*, whats your assigned number at birth, let me record you with 50 cameras at all times just in case, gimme your PapERS HOW OLD ARE YOU WHATS YOUR GRANDMAS MAIDEN NAME NO IM NOT SELLING YOU THIS CARTON OF EGGS UNTIL YOU TELL ME" society (Admittedly! not every single place in the world today is like this necessarily!!! so you can just put them someplace else and work from there!!! but youd have to know how life there actually looks like And also wait whats the point of this au if everything ends up the same lmao i wanted asra to have tiktok and work at starbucks what are we doing here) vs the old timey fantasy world presented in the game where its just "yeah sure you can go live in a forest theres no fences here lol bye dont get dysentery" which is how the world used to be i guess and thats so fun to ponder for me lol we really were just monkeys fucking about with sticks huh. good times

man this is why i dont actually write fanfics i get too lost in four different trains of thought and dont finish any of them lmao and i guess also cause of the "i Cant POSSIBLY write this story about kissing a dude if i cant describe the sociopolitical climate in this neighbourhood in the netherlands after the Batavian Rebellion and how it influenced the contemporaneous fauvistic arT MOVEMENT with UTMOST ACCURACY cause THATS WHAT HIS FAVOURITE PAINTING WAS THE ONE THAT SHOWS UP IN THIS THREE SECOND BLURRY BACKGROUND CLIP OF THIS SCENE IN HIS APARTMENT AND IS CRUCIAL TO HIS CHARACTER AND I HAVE TO NAIL IT WHAT DONT YOU GET" type personality i got going which i guess writers deal with by just going full "lol whatever i am god here and i make law" mode

i just started thinking about this cause of the new story on dorian in a modern au i got pretty hype about it teehee but yeah muriel hasnt shown up yet so i got into that whole spiral about wHERE ARE THEY GONNA PUT ME BOYE AAAGJHFN i hope he gets a good outfit lmao i love jules' vibe but i looked at asra n went aw Hell naw hed be way better dripped out you done my boy dirty cmon man. pashas hawaiian shirt tho fucking we're so back lets go lesbians hkdyyifulj Anyway they made lucio a wholeass bilionaire which had me shook a lil for some reason but i can see him as a total ~Musk-esque~ archetype lmaooo like that is literally so him, just barges in and makes people have good ideas for him gikgststnv oh god i hope theres not any elon fans reading this cause theyre not gonna appreciate that oh fudge ok lets get back to the point which was uuuuhhhhhhhhhh oh yeah i liked your muriel lives in a van concept i thought its good! yeah thats what i wanted to say. what a tumultuous journey i just had to invent to arrive here.

Oh yeah, I've been seeing a lot more posts and questions about the arcana's modern au, and it's why I was so happy to dig up all those old ask arcana posts! I'm so glad we have all that canon content from way back when, it was so sad that I could only put ten images in one post T~T

And Muriel definitely lives off the grid - I also remember another ask arcana that said in modern times he'd wear a cable knit sweater on top and leather pants and demonias on bottom and that works so well for him XD

Here's the screenshots since the links haven't been working: