#im sad we never found out what was going on with elias

[thornswoggled]

okay stream of consciousness thoughts about chapter 103 because that was. kind of a lot

we have to remind the reader that stella still exists

in fact lets remind them that chapter 97 happened at all

some confirmation that the new mage has a similarly aloof and misanthropic world view as other mages we already know. it doesnt matter if humans get eaten because its all toward a desirable end. reminds me very much of kyokos "the familiars eat the weak humans and turn into witches, then we eat those witches" speech. this coldness makes me think chise might be in a spot of trouble if they really earnestly try to recruit her again, or that elias may be able to have some self-satisfaction from knowing all along that their intentions are not pure

who is the "he" the apprentice wants to meet. the dragon???

this is the horniest title page weve gotten in like, a while

"dear chise. we will be running tests on you. <3" can one of them be an autism eval

okay so zoey was feeling bad because he was going birdmode. i guess when titania did whatever she did to him in chapter 99 it jumpstarted a sort of evolutionary process. strikes me as the sort of thing a creature like her would do. i imagine this will cause maximum ride-esque problems for him in public. he will have to wear a trench coat. you look like youre about to tell your friend not to come to school tomorrow. etc.

"atavism, atavism" ... the last time we heard that mentioned was from yori in 98. maybe warming us up for whatever this is? i have to wonder what the point of this small wing growth plot is. a result of heightened chaotic magic in the country?

this chapter takes place on my birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! seems fitting too, this chapter feels like "things are about to change, right fucking now," so having this all happen on the last day of the year feels right

a new scene!! pretty cool, and an allusion that the business with jasper is over and settled. it didnt occur to me until now that hes gone without any mention. gone as quickly as he showed up. SAD! well theres other guys

i dont think ill ever understand why chise is able to turn into a dragon unless its spelled out to me like im five. especially since the type of dragon that cursed her isnt even the same kind

"causes and factors attract and amplify each other" = "the shape goes into a shape press that presses the shape into a pressed shape"

elias is capable of bridal-carrying someone who isnt chise but hes tangentially linked to chise so it doesnt really count

a precious few pages dedicated to the fact that joseph may have at one point known how or why elias was "made." the type of creature he is is a "shadowborn," but this feels like a new translation of something that used to be called something different. elias notes that fae call him "shadowborn" as well. is this a reinterpretation of "half-made" or similar phrases?

also, i like elias' insistence that joseph cough up any information he has. yes, elias, id like to know too, keep shaking that boy

joseph bluntly demanding that chise carry him and her just being like. okay. your honor i love them they are total freaks of nature

confirmation that when chise said "priors...?" it means that she never found out that elias used to throw away her college recruitment letters. that was pretty damn funny

so theres a chance this "beyond the great wall" line did not mean what i thought it meant and now the egg is probably on my face. yamazaki listen to me very closely. what did you mean by that. besides yet another "well well well chise it looks like youre going to finally be cured of your lucky girl syndrome and bad shit will actually start happening to you for real now" line because we have GOTTEN that already

im gonna level with you i dont know who hilda is. are we supposed to know who hilda is? is she the st georges mom? she might be. she probably is. okay i just looked it up and she is

and shes flying to iceland! presumably to consult with lindel about all this dragon business. i wonder if this will be the event that prompts him to appear in london where he has that tense standoff with chise and elias

i have no idea what the bottom half of the last page is trying to communicate, who is speaking, etc

so yeah this all very much feels like a "things are ramping up and heres where all the respective parties we care about are right now" chapter. a lot to chew on

[delusionisaplace]

the taste of vengeance: intro

i just finished chapter one over the course of this past weekend, so i thought i’d share a small bit of it :)))

im not really sure if any of this makes sense out of context though lol, so if you want more information, feel free to ask!!

words: 1,809

From deep within the chamber, I heard the door creak, disrupting my thoughts. 

“Victor?” a low voice called, “Victor?” The voice grew louder and louder until it was directly behind me. “Victor,” the housekeep said firmly, “Faina and Elias request to see you. They wish to bid you farewell before you depart.”

I could feel a bittersweet smile tug at my lips as I continued to stare at the burning coals.“Ah, yes. Send them in, please.” 

The chambermaid left me another word, but one echoed deep my mind: farewell. In forming this decision, I never quite considered the possibility that I would have to say farewell to those that I loved in my search of a more fulfilling life, nor did I prepare myself for the moment that I would have to.

A hand found its way around my waist, a pair of lips planting themselves on my cheek. “Victor. Elias and I have come to say our farewells.”

I turned to face Faina—once I gazed into her amber eyes, a solemn look began to descend over my face. I never once thought I would ever leave the woman I once considered the love of my life, the woman I was to be wed to by the end of winter.

Her brow furrowed at the sight of my slack expression. “What is wrong, Victor? You seem as though someone has died? Are you sick?” She pressed the back of her hand to my forehand, checking to see if my temperature had dropped.

“No,” I said with a wry chuckle. “I am fine, just a bit uneasy. This will pass soon.”

She drew her hand back and shifted her gaze towards the ground. “So…I presume you are packed and ready to leave?”

“Indeed I am.”

“Have you planned on where you will go?”

I shook my head, a mix of sadness and uncertainty growing in my chest with each passing moment. “I haven’t yet, Faina. After all, there are many places, many possibilities, and this life is long. I’m sure I will have time to see all that I desire.”

She went silent for a long while, mustering up the words she had kept buried deep in her heart. “Must you leave us, Victor?” Faina’s lips began to tremble slightly as she spoke, tears threatening to pool in her eyes. 

“Oh, yes. I am afraid I must. I feel as though I am trapped here.”

“I do not understand how you could feel such a way when you are surrounded by those who love you. Is there another reason why you are leaving? Is it me? Have I done something wrong?”

I could feel my heart tear upon hearing the pain in her voice.“No. This is no fault of your own. The issue resides in me. You and Elias know what your paths in life are, but I have spent my life following the one that had been assigned to me from birth. Now, it is time for me to discover how I would like to spend my life.”

She took my hand, holding on tightly as if afraid to let go. “Victor. Be honest with me. Is this because of your father’s refusal to end our engagement?”

“To some degree.” A pang of guilt tugged at my heart. “There are more reasons, but I know that if I stay, we will have to be wed by the end of this winter, and I know I will be suffocated by the expectations and responsibilities that would come with our union. This is not the life I want for either of us. We deserve a love that is born out of choice, not obligation—I don’t want our relationship to be tainted by regret and resentment.”

The weight of my words settled heavily on Faina’s shoulders, her eyes now shimmering with unshed tears. I could not tell what she was thinking at that moment, nor could I tell exactly what her intentions were in what she said next. “I love you, Victor. And I will continue to, even when you stop loving me. I do not care that your heart belongs to someone else, and I do not care that you no longer wish to be betrothed. I will not ask you to stay, nor will I hold you back. I simply ask that you uphold your end of our promise.”

“Thank you, my dear, for understanding.” I smiled to soothe her nerves despite the agony I felt in the depths of my soul. “I think it is time for me to say goodbye to Elias.” 

I could see her lips drop into a frown at the mention of his name. “I…suppose so.” she said hesitantly. She avoided my gaze and tried to change the topic as she ran her fingers through my tangled tresses. “Farewell, Victor. May your journey bring you the peace and clarity you seek. I hope you remain safe in your travels.” With her slender, delicate fingers, she dusted my face and planted a kiss on my forehead. “Alright now, go on.”

I carefully approached Elias: he stood off in a corner where the fire’s light did not reach, his features dark and cloaked in shadows, a scowl evident on his face.

I stood before him, the weight of my decision heavy in the air between us. As I cleared my throat, he turned his gaze towards me, his eyes narrow with mistrust.

“I see you’ve made up your mind then,” Elias muttered, his voice laced with bitterness.

I nodded, my voice filled with remorse. “I have.” I stammered, searching for other words to say other than that. “It…it is time I learn who I truly am apart from the life I was destined to at birth.”

Elias diverted his eyes towards the ground, his fists clenching at his side. “And what of us, Victor? What of the plans we have made? Do they mean nothing to you now?” His voice fell to a low whisper as he continued to speak his mind. “It was not long ago we planned to elope. It was not long ago that you kissed me, and it was not long ago you said you loved me more than anything in the world. So why, Victor, do you intend to leave me?”

My heart shattered into pieces at this question: I never thought of how Elias would respond to the news of my departure, nor did I think that I would be breaking the oath I made to him only a few months prior. At that moment, it dawned on me that I was abandoning him, a man who had sworn his heart and life to me, a man who was devoted to only me, and immediately, a feeling of guilt overcame me. 

“I…I simply want to take a different path in life than the one I was appointed, as I said earlier.” I answered him, trying to conceal the pain in my voice.

“And this, I understand. What I do not understand, however, is why there is no room for me in this new life you seek.” He inched closer, entering the light as he reached to hold my hands in his. “Why? Why must you leave?” He brought his eyes back up to mine—they glistened with water, his face slick with tears. “Can you not take me with you?” 

I felt my own tears well up, threatening to spill over as I looked into Elias’ pleading eyes, begging me to stay by his side. How was I to explain to him that this was a task I had to undertake on my own when he looked at me with those eyes, those eyes which held a depth of desperation and loss?

“I wish I could, but it is necessary I find myself, that I understand my own desires and dreams apart from the expectations that have been placed upon me. This is not a path that can be shared, regardless of how much we wish it were.”

He tightened his grip on my hands, his touch providing a small comfort in the face of our looming separation. “We have been through so much together, and we have conquered countless obstacles together. So why must you face this by yourself?”

My heart ached at the forlorn tone of his voice, and for a brief moment, I wavered. I considered telling him this was nothing more than a twisted jest, and that I had always planned for him to leave with me— a tantalizing thought, I admit. But as much as I longed to soothe his pain, as much as I longed for him to accompany me, I knew I had to find who I was truly meant to be and what my purpose was, even if it meant leaving Elias behind for a while.

“Elias, I began, my voice barely above a whisper, “this is something I must do independently, and you are aware of this. Why try to deny what you are already privy to?” 

Elias finally released my hands, his expression a mix of resignation and sadness.“If this is truly what you need, Victor, then I will respect your decision,” he said, his voice heavy with defeat. “Simply tell me…that you will return one day. This is all I ask of you.”

“I guarantee that this separation shall be temporary. I shall return, and I shall take you with me to all the places I have visited and more.” I reached up to hold his face, combing his dark locks out of his eyes. “I promise I will come back for you one day. Do not take any lovers in my absence.” I said with a light chuckle, jesting to add levity to the situation—still, the joke felt flat and poorly timed.

“I won’t, Victor. I shall remain faithful to you only.” He offered me a sad smile as he pulled me into an embrace, his arms tightly wound around my body, his chin gently resting atop my head. I could feel the rapid beat of his heart, his large hands cradling my head— I wanted to hold on for as long as I could, I wanted to stay in the warmth of his arms—I wanted to cherish this very moment. After what seemed to be ages, Elias slowly released me. 

“Victor…I suppose this is farewell for now. But know that a part of me will always be waiting for you, hoping that you will return to me.” He leaned in and pressed his lips against mine, a bittersweet kiss filled with both love and grief—one that held a lifetime of memories and a promise for the future. As we broke apart, Elias whispered, “Take care, my love. Find yourself and come back to me.”

taglist (ask to added or removed): @fleurtygurl @macabremoons @ember-writer

[venfx]

magnus fic roundup

as tma comes to a close, i thought i'd post some of my favorite fics to come out of this fandom. most of these are classics, listed in no particular order.

A Weather In The Flesh by @cuttoothed​ | 3K | S1-S4 | Jon/Martin | Complete

"There is a span of years where Jon doesn’t touch anyone other than the occasional hand shake. It’s not so bad. He’s never been someone who’s needed physical affection."

Jon has never been any good at making people want to stick around.

↳ this is such a well-done exploration of jon’s character and his relationship with touch, and i’ve re-read it at least five times. sweet and sad and phenomenally well-written.

in the chillest land and on the strangest sea by imperfectcircle, singlecrow | 20K | Safehouse, S1-S4 | Jon & Daisy, Jon/Martin | Complete

Jon remembers a statement he read years ago given by a Jesuit priest, who said that the shortest prayer he knew was, just, fuck it, as in fuck it; it's in God's hands. He takes Daisy's hand and trails on after her.

or; hope is a thing with feathers.

↳ hey, you wanna fuckin..... feel things? read this.

The Magnus Institute vs the 21st Century: a series of emails and IMs by shinyopals | 26K | Series | S3 | Pre-Jon/Martin | Complete

The Magnus Institute hires a Data Protection Officer. He sets about diligently booking in meetings, writing policy documents, and training all the staff in the importance of confidentiality. Now if only he could get hold of the Head Archivist, who seems to have vanished again...

(Jon is only trying to save the world, but apparently some people think he should still be doing his day job.)

↳ i’d be surprised to find people who haven’t read this series, but it’s the definition of “the magnus archives is a workplace comedy”. also, alasdair stuart has actually read some clips of this on Twitch, so that’s a fun bonus.

Bell, Book, and Candle by yellow_caballero | 102K | Series | S3 into S4 | Jon/Martin | Complete 

In accordance with the Ride or Die Pact of 2009, Jonathan Sims can call upon Georgie Barker at any time for aid with no strings attached. Despite their rocky history, their childhood friendship, and Jon’s barely recovered alcoholism, this pact is sacred and must be upheld.

Georgie Barker may regret this. She may regret it when she discovers that the world is full of monsters and eldritch gods and dickhead managers. She may regret it when a punk rocker who should be dead collapses on their doorstep, a teenager again who needs their help. She may regret it when her stupid ex-boyfriend starts selling his soul for knowledge and the ability to keep his new family safe.

But she probably won’t. Georgie isn’t scared of anything - not a Clown’s apocalypse, not the apocalypse that Jon is destined to begin, and not Jon’s own loss of humanity.

Maybe she should be.

↳ if you’re looking for an everyone-lives-no-one-dies-happy-ending fic that also happens to be massively chaotic, look no further. 

The Reverb in These Holy Halls by @wolftraps​ | 98K | AU, S1-S4 | Jon/Martin | Complete

Undoing the apocalypse would have been enough for Jon, if all his people survived. Without them, Jon's only recourse is making it so it never happened in the first place. He's going to do better this time.

↳ quintessential time travel AUs. plot-wise, i feel like these can be difficult to write, but op does a fantastic job of tying things together in a way that makes sense. plus, it’s just fun to read.

jon sims v the nhs by @thoughtsbubble​ | 12K | Series | S3 | Complete

Joan Bright has a new patient. He's carrying an old tape recorder and is covered head to toe in scars. Jonathan Sims looks dangerous, but Dr Bright has dealt with all sorts of atypical individuals. She has no reason to be nervous.

Right?

↳ if you’ve ever thought “hey, jon should probably go to therapy”, then 1) you’re absolutely right and 2) this is... probably what would’ve happened. prior knowledge of The Bright Sessions is not required. also, apparently, this fic is written by the showrunner of The Underwood Collection? wild.

Family, Found by Dribbledscribbles | 9K | S4 | Complete

It’s Basira who catches onto it.

The collective shift that seems to come over them when heading in or out of the Institute. Not just the oppressive sensation of being observed, their every move catalogued for the voyeuristic cravings of some unseen Eye(s). That feeling remained with them even when they left the Institute these days, but it was always stronger inside its walls. That wasn’t the change. Nor was it the point.

The point was: making life worse for Jonathan Sims.

↳ i think being part of the avengers fandom circa 2012 has given me permanent found-family-trope brainrot, but you know what. jonathan sims can have a little happiness, as a treat. 

Road to Damascus by @titanfalling​ | 107K | Series | S4 | Jon & Tim | Complete

n. an important moment of insight, typically one that leads to a dramatic transformation of attitude or belief

Or, in which Tim becomes an avatar for the end of all things.

↳ tim dies and then he doesn’t. there is catharsis and world building. just....read it.

Come, Change Your Ring With Me by @backofthebookshelf​ | 29K | S3 | Peter/Jon, Jon/Martin, Peter/Elias | Complete

The Lukases demand the Archivist marry into the family, and the Institute relies on them too much to say no. Peter is smug. Elias is fuming. Martin is suffering. Jon thinks this might be tolerable if only Peter would hurry up and leave him alone already.

OR, the soap opera we call an Archives revolves around Peter Lukas this time.

↳ superb evil-bastards-in-love content, feat. martin pining, tim being obnoxious, and jon being... well, tired, mostly. i will literally never get tired of how op writes peter. 

creatures that i briefly move along by @dotsayers​ | 16K | Series | AU, Post-S4 | background Jon/Martin 

Mr Sims was so weird, was the thing. Miss Grant always said calling people weird was rude, and Anna sort of agreed, but she didn’t know what other word to use to describe Mr Sims.

He’d only been in with the class for a few days, really, and half of that he just sat at the back listening, but that didn’t stop her from making a swift judgement. 5BG had had student teachers before, back when they were 3ST, and they’d been uniformly normal.

Mr Sims was… actually, Anna had a better adjective. He was interesting.

↳ i just.... love teacher!jon fics. this series delivers. 

Once Bitten by @apatheticbutterflies | 1K | S4 | Jon & Daisy | Complete

Jon Sims has always been a jumpy kind of guy. Nervous. Twitchy. Daisy used to think it meant he was guilty. Turns out he was. Just not of what she’d thought.

Daisy learns how to peel an orange.

↳ daisy and jon’s relationship is an example of an instance where i’m happy to say “fuck what you wrote mr. jonny ‘chocolate torte of tragedy’ sims, i want them to be friends”.

pins and needles by mutterandmumble | 13K | S1-S4 | Complete

He’s got a reputation to uphold anyways; an uptight, rigid reputation that dictates the way that he interacts and functions and is such an integral part of him that he can’t let go of it anytime soon. He likes his safety nets. He likes his contingencies. He likes his privacy, and everything around this place right down to the walls seems to have ears, so he’ll stay tight-lipped up to and beyond the threat of death.

He’s good at that.

In which Jon takes up embroidery and bumbles through life the best that he can.

↳ out of all the introspective jon pieces i’ve read (and there are many), this one stands out. maybe it’s the symbolism or the characterisation, or maybe it’s the fact that i have an embroidery kit lurking in the back of my closet along with a hundred other half-pursued hyperfixations. whatever. this is excellent.

sleeping in by @ivelostmyspectacles | 5K | S2 | Jon/Tim | Complete

“Who are you trying to convince?”

Jon gives up, letting his head sag against Tim’s shoulder. “I don’t know.”

aka Elias gets tired of Jon and Tim's bickering, sends them away for a "team-building" weekend trip, and is sure to book them a room with only one bed

↳ this has everything you’d need from a “oh no there’s only one bed” fic. someone please get these men therapy.

if you try, sometimes (you get what you knead) by @ajcrawly​ | 3.5K | S1-S4 | Jon/Martin, Tim/Sasha | Complete

It starts with an abundance of boeuf bourguignon and ends up as a team tradition.

Food and love in uncertain times.

↳ more found family fic, this time with a diverse og!archival staff and food as a metaphor for love. hurt in all the right ways. made me hungry in the process.

[p1nkwitch]

⌘ and ✿ for Lonely Eyes with Elias in pain

Aww you know me so well <3

Little bit of an au where his attempted ritual fails and everything goes wrong, plus Peter lives cause I want him to. Lonelyeyes is the ship that keeps on giving.

So enjoy.

✿: feeling so out of it, they need constant attention

⌘: being picked up

It failed-

No.

No,nonon. His life work-

Jonah Magnus, aka Elias Bouchard has the sudden feeling of vertigo hit him and his body slumps on his office. While he twitches in place, the sheer pressure of being seen is so much that it leaves him completely breathless.

He can't move, or think, only feel the metaphorical eye stare him down like a physical force.

The last time he felt this was when he attempted his ritual in the panopticon so long ago.

Elias feels ill all of a sudden, very ill. So with shaky legs he gets up and manages to run off, Rosie stands up to ask, but he shakes his head and tells her she is dismissed. Then he goes.

His mind was doubling itself trying to comprehend, but as if in a fog, everything slipped away. Elias could not focus on anything, he could see but not understand, as if that was being stripped away. With that he realized he did not know what to do, where to go, his boy was on fire and he must look terrible because-

Because people were staring, whispering, knowing and watching and judging and-

Run-

Where-

Wherewherewherewhere-

Where does he go, where is he, who is he-

His mind was spinning and a person tries to approach him, when suddenly he feels-

Blanketed somehow, muffled. The people stop watching and he is left alone and his mind can think straight for a few minutes before it becomes impossible. He needs to go home, needs to go back and-

And rest.

To plan, to get better and find a loophole or something, he has to, Elias needs to find something. He hasn't come this far for it to fail now, but his body betrays him and his knees give out on him, making him fall to the floor. His temperature raises, and he feels himself start to weep slightly all of it for nothing? Is this how it goes? How it ends…

With him slumped on the street, with his archivist running amok-

Him alone….

Jonah lets a few tears in his feverish state and starts to pass out, when he hears something distorted and familiar.

The impossibility makes his shriveled heart ache. Peter Lukas died, and even if he was alive he would not come back for him, not after letting him go to face Jon.

He manages to mumble his name and knows no more.

Elias wakes up again, a miracle, maybe the police found him and got him to a hospital before sending him back again-

Yet he sees his room. He is in bed, wrapped up in sheets, his sluggish mind cant comprehend fully what is going on, but he latches on the familiarity, latches on the safety of the place and what it means.

So slowly he closes his eyes again and sleeps once more.

The next time he wakes up to someone lifting him in a bridal carry, he tries to move away now afraid, but he hears grunting and his eyes open slightly. He blurrily sees a bearded, pale face stare him down. He sniffles and feels his eyes wet against his wishes.

“Please don't start again, I can't keep watching you cry Elias” He doesn't understand. In all honesty his mind is nothing but syrup, the only thing it latches on is on this man that he is sure is gone and yet he is here looking after him.

“Please” He is not sure what he is asking for, but Peter sighs and just stares at him. He can see his face look uncomfortable, but Elias-? Jonah? Which one is it? Feels a spark of recognition. He wants him to keep looking at him.

His mind slips away again and he presses his cheek to his chest before passing out.

The next time, he still feels lost, he makes a few noises of discomfort and Peter comes out of the door and starts to check on him. Touches his forehead, mumbles something and gives a quick caress to his cheek. Then he moves to go, but he makes a quite honest pathetic noise that if he were in a better frame of mind, Jonah would be appalled to be making.

Still it serves his purpose well, Peter hesitates and he tries to mumble his name, even if it feels like pulling teeth.

“P-ter?” The man pulls his hair back and sighs before sitting next to him, his body aches still, and he feels hot, but he still turns around to press himself closer to him. Peter slowly starts to play with his damp hair and mumbles words that he can't bring himself to understand. Elias just wants him to stay and watch over him, he feels so bad, its impossible to think of anything else than that.

Eventually it lulls him enough to doze off.

And so it goes like that.

Elias just… wakes up and demands for Peter attention to be kept on him for as long as he can. Slowly he gains enough awareness to feel the fear of him leaving him.

Of Peter dropping him due to this and going to the Tundra. His body is wrecked with shivers and his eyes get blurry with tears. The man is holding him while trying to calm him down, even if Elias can't say why he is like this.

“Shh, why? You were doing so well, why did you start to cry again?? What's wrong, Elias I don't know what to do you little bastard-” He cant stop. He weeps.

Its as if he was letting out something he had lodged inside himself and now he could not make himself stop, he didn't know how to do it. It was tearing at him, but it also felt somewhat relieving?

It was unfair.

Peter just held him closer and hushed him. Elias just wept for this surely would make him leave.

So stupid and clingy and empty headed that he was, nothing like himself whatever that meant. Just ill and pathetic like he had never been before.

“Shhh, no, no listen its not just-” His ears are ringing and he just presses his face closer before blacking out.

The next few times he wakes up only to throw up. Peter has to lift him to take him to the bathroom to clean his mouth, he barely manages to catch the black thing he threw up before the man quickly picks him up.

He is dying isn't he?

He is going to die-

“No, no you aren't i swear” He mumbles it and weep and when he tries to lift his hands to clean his face the man stops him and shakes it.

“Careful” Why? What is wrong-

He looks down and sees black spots on his clothes where the tears should have fell. Is he-

“Its ok, it will pass-” He pulls at his arms and draws him closer.

“Sorry-” Elias just presses himself against Peter and keeps mumbling it. Not even knowing what he is sorry for. Only that he feels it from the bottom of his heart.

He refuses to eat, or tries to, must of the time he merely is so out of it, that Peter just offers food and he opens his mouth, but when he is a little bit more himself he refuses. Why? What does it matter-

“Please just a little bit, cmon once you are ok, you can help im sure you will know what happened-” He has no way to know what he means and honestly? He doesn't care.

Leave he wants to say, like always.

What comes out instead is-

“Stay please-” He shivers under the covers and Peter hums while playing with his hair. He is odd, usually he should have left and yet.

“Ok, i don't- there is nowhere else to go Elias. Whatever happened… it left everyone adrift” He feels a tentative kiss to his forehead.

“So please, please get better” His arms tightened and it's so… unlike him and yet its everything Elias has ever wanted from the man. He buries his face on the crook of his neck and breathes. He doesn't know what is happening, but he wants Peter to stay with him, the only person who knows him and yet comes back.

Who came back despite everything.

“How are you here….” A chuckle.

“Took you long enough… I don't know, I remember sort of dying, yet also… not? Sort of like I dispersed in the lonely, almost… would have just disappeared” He nods even if it feels weird.

“But-?”

“But i felt someone-” And he kisses his head “Being lonely and it was enough to appear”

“... mmSo-” Peter shakes his head.

“No, no you're not and i don't want you to, we both tried to hurt the other, lets call it even ok?”

“Kay, Peter i cant… i don't know if i can be better-” His mind starts to slip away again so he grabs onto the man, he seems to be the only thing keeping him together at this rate. He is so dazed he can't notice him stiffening and taking a deep breath.

“You will, im- im sure of it, you are definitely better than when i found you! Can stay, stay awake for longer, so that's ok? We are talking” And they are, yet..

“Don't think it will last… was too much beholding i can't-” Peter sounds more strained.

“You will be fine, you have to. I don't know what to do Elias, i- forsaken left- everything is too much you have to be fine, i don't think i could- could deal with you g-gone” His eyes are already closing so he looks up. Peter looks sick too, less than him, but still he has bags under his eyes, they are red and puffy as if he cried too. He was pale by nature but now its concerning.

“Sorry…”

“Elias?”

“Mm” He can't keep himself up anymore.

He wishes he could stay, he would love to see how Peter would be now.

When he wakes up this time, its to someone holding his hand and the muffled sounds of crying, he blinks up and feels…. ok.

Not perfect, but not terrible either. His mind is far more awake than it has been in… god knows how long.

When he turns around he sees Peter is holding his hand and pressing his face to it.

He is the one crying.

It makes something that he thinks he buried a long time ago surface.

He feels sympathy for him, feels… that he very much would want him to stop crying and be the odd and charming man he married several times.

Elias does not like to see him sad, what a weird concept.

So he squeezes his hand and Peter jolts as if shocked looking up at him. He smiles tiredly.

“You look like shit captain” It startles him and for a second he stares with his mouth slightly open until he snorts and starts laughing.

Soon it turns into more tears but he kind of ignores it since he feels his own start to come out.

“Hey”

“You miserable excuse of a watcher” He grins.

“I love you too” Peter gets up from the chair he was sitting on, lifts the covers making him curse him and picks him up easily before kissing him. He clumsily reciprocates, but soon starts to kiss him with little pecks making the taller man nuzzle his nose.

“I love you” Elias freezes waiting for the yet, however there is nothing. Peter just lowers him slowly and gets in next to him.

“Why?” He did not mean to say that, yet he sees him smile amusedly and that fits far much more on his face than the sadness.

“Because- if you didn't notice our gods dropped the ball on us and i think… I think it would hurt too much if you were gone. Far more than I could bear with. I thought it would be fine before, but i… was wrong. The past 3 weeks proved it”

Elias parses through all of it. He hates that he knows. That he can feel the hole in his awareness. That he has spent 3 weeks purging 150 years worth of power. Its frightening and he is sure that the terror will settle later on, But now…

Now he wants to stay like this longer, to remain in this little bubble for a little bit longer until he has to face this new reality.

“I felt relieved when I thought you survived before passing out the first time. It felt… good to think you were still there, even if I didn't understand why you would help me” Peter traces shapes on his arm causing goosebumps on his skin.

“Did not know either, figured you would have answers, thought i could be angry later. But you were so out of it… kept crying in your sleep it was terrifying. So pale and sick… did not want that at all. Then you-” He seems to be at a loss of words.

“Peter?”

“You stopped breathing.” Elias blinks and has a moment of pure distilled panic.

“I-”

“That's why I was holding your- you stopped breathing I thought you were…” He swallows.

“Clearly you were wrong huh?”

“Yes… yes i was i guess” He pulls him closer and he rests against him.

“We will figure it out” Peter just nods. “We will Peter, just… just trust me on that” A deep breath, he is asking for too much-

“Just this once” But it's enough it seems.

“I'm still- i don't feel perfect, but i feel better…” They tangle their legs and Peter talks.

About having to look for medicine, making sure he was well, feeding him, calling Simon to asks what to do-

And Elias eats all of it, but especially all the moments where he was semi lucid and Peter seemed to do everything to keep him happy, to make him stop crying. Apparently if he ever wanted for Peter to just do as he said he should have just cried, it seems he can't deal with it at all.

Some things in bed make far more sense now in retrospect. Smiling he listens and when he is done asks for something to eat. Nodding he gets up, but before Elias can attempt to try and go with him, Peter merely picks him up and takes him to the kitchen.

“Hey-! I can do it on my own Peter!! What are you-”

“You will probably face plant, quicker like this, plus… I sort of…” He sees him blush and he raises an eyebrow.

“Yes…?”

“You will mock me!” He starts to smirk slightly.

“Depends on what it is love” That makes him flush brighter and Elias looks amazed at it, Peter hardly ever blushed let alone at any of his terms of endearment.

“I missed having you look at me cooking” He mumbles it so slowly he can barely hear it but it settles snugly somewhere near his heart.

“Oh”

Once seated Peter goes to make food and he starts asking questions until three animals jump to the table and his lap asking for attention.

“My lovelies!” Duchess and Empress purr and rub themselves against him while the captain sort of plays with his hand.

“Yes, had to keep them away from the room, they would cling to you and mewl like crazy. It was… sort of sad to watch” He can imagine it. So he holds his cats and kisses their little heads while cooing.

They eat and Elias wants to take a bath, he asks the man to prepare it and take him there.

“You know i feel like you are now abusing this”

“Not one bit, i'm still ill, keep me well, love, and i will be up in no time” He sees him hide his flustered face slightly and Elias chuckles.

He has no idea what to do now, but he will figure it out like usual, for now he has Peter looking over him and the cats. And.

If he is not wrong, a bunch of ex avatars are very pissed off at his archivist and associates for ruining things, so at least he can get rid of them at the very least.

Recovering the institute after the whole fiasco with the hunters will be a nightmare, along with technically escaping prison, but Peter said he already looked into it a little bit. So it could be worse. For now he will rest and ask for his husbands caretaking for as long as he can get away with it.

And Peter seems to be rather happy now that he can fight him back a little bit and he is no longer on the verge of death.

Elias… Elias thinks he loves him. More than he ever did before.

Wonders about it, however… for now he is ok with not knowing the why’s. Happy with just enjoying the moment for what it is worth.

[dripkingpetey]

love-e.pettersson

ive been working on this for a few days and im kinda proud of it! would love some feedback from you or requests for other story lines, i promise i’ll stop doing the friends to lovers storylines haha. i also accidentally deleted this and i was so sacred i couldnt get it back but here it is! i hope you enjoy.

*lowercase intended!*

2.2k words

he loves you, you know that right?

“why did you drag me here, i really don’t like hockey and you know that.” you said as you sighed to your bestfriend lucie while she pulls you down to your seats in rogers arena. 

“i know you don’t.” lucie said with a bright smile on her face. “but, you’re gonna learn to like it.” you look at her in confusion. “so, this is your way of torturing me as if you don’t already torture me enough by bringing me to parties.” you said while sitting down and looking at the players who are starting to get on the ice. “maybe.” lucie said with a wide grin and a mischievous look on her face before puck drop starts.

you’ve never been big on hockey, which is surprising considering you have lived in vancouver your whole life and your family is super big hockey fans. you also aren't the most extroverted person. sure, you’d go out to bars sometimes but mostly just with your close friends.

“what part of this sport do you even like?” you said as the game is going into the third period the canucks are now up 4-1 against the opposing team which you don’t even really know who they are. “well, if I’m being honest some of them are really hot but mostly cause of the sport.” you scoffed at her response. “none of them are hot from where i can see.” lucie looked at you with a shocked look. “oh you’ll get it once you get to know the players more.” you give her a confused look and put your full attention back to the game.

-

canucks ended up winning the game 5-2, lucie was very happy about it and you could tell cause she wanted to go out for a couple drinks and you didn’t want to say no so you agreed to go.

you had been at the bar for about twenty minutes and lucie was already gone which isn’t surprising, she was probably sleeping with some guy right now.

you started to panic a little when a creepy old dude came up to you and started hitting on you. “hey pretty girl, want to come home with me?” he started putting his hand on your arm which was resting on the table. you look around for lucie in panic but she’s no where to be found. 

you then feel a pair of arms sneak around your waist and you get even more freaked out. 

“hey babe, sorry i was gone for so long.” elias says to you with a smile but then proceeds to give the creepy dude the alien death stare which worked. after the dude leaves elias faces you and starts speaking. “sorry i touched you like that, it looked like you were alone and that guy was creeping you out so i thought you could use some help.” he shoots an apologetic smile at you. 

“its okay,” you give him a smile back. “thank you a lot actually, i have no idea where my friend went.” you take another look around the bar before looking back and him. 

“i’m elias by the way.” he smiles at you while holding his hand out for you to shake it. “y/n.” you say before shaking his hand. 

“so elias, what are you doing in this bar on a thursday night?” you gesture for him to sit down next to you. “if i told you, you wouldn’t believe me.” elias lets out a soft laugh while sitting down across from you. “tell me, i wanna know.” elias sighs lightly before he starts speaking again. “i’m with them,” he gestures over to brock, jake, quinn, thatcher and troy. you look over to see them all waving at you and laughing at elias, you laugh softly and wave back at the before turning your attention back to elias. “ah, so i’m guessing you’re on the canucks?”

elias lets out a nervous laugh. “yeah, why don’t we go somewhere else where the boys aren’t up my ass?” you take another sip out of your drink. “i would love to.” he holds out his hand for you and as you guys walk out you can hear the guys chirping, but when you look over to elias you can see him giving the death stare to the boys and it makes you laugh. “you have a scary death stare jeez.” elias leads you to his car. “that’s surprisingly what the fans love me for.” he smiles at you before opening the car 

door for you.

-

“…and that’s all what led me to being on the canucks.” elias said to you while eating a chip out of the chip bowl you had prepared. it had been a couple hours since you guys left the bar and went back to your apartment, you don’t know why but it felt like you and elias had such a strong bond already that you both felt like you can talk for hours and hours and never get tired of each other, he felt the same way too. “jeez, i kinda sound like a douche. i’ve been talking about myself all night, please tell me more about you.” elias said to you while you laughed at his words. 

“it’s all good, i’ve been the one asking questions anyways.” you smiled while responding to him. “no seriously, tell me something about you before i have to go which i really don’t want to by the way.” 

you look at the time and realize its almost twelve am so you proceed to give him a quick response. “well, i’ve lived in vancouver my whole life. and i’m currently going to ubc as a nursing student.” you smiled at his now very amused face. 

“see, that’s something i wouldn’t have known if you didn’t say it,” he laughs a little before he finishes his sentence. “can i get your number? i have practice early tomorrow morning but i’m free for the rest of the day if you want to hang out.” 

you smile at his words and take his phone from him. “of course you can, i’m free tomorrow too just give me a call.” you said while handing his phone back to him after you’ve entered your number. elias gives you a wide grin and you both get up so you could walk him to the door. “goodnight elias.” you look up at him with a smile as he’s standing in the doorway. “goodnight y/n, sweet dreams.” he said and then started to walk down the hallway towards the elevator. “pettersson!” you called out at him and he turns around confused. “text me when you get home.” he gives you the thumbs up and you close your door and head to bed. 

no ones ever shown this much attention to elias before, at least no one he’s truly cared about. 

he smiled to himself on his drive home cause he was excited to text you again.

*contact name changed to “y/n<3”* 

text message to y/n<3:i just got home, thank you for the awesome night :).

-

it’s been a couple weeks since you and elias had met at the bar, you basically hung out with each other anytime you could. 

you were each others best friends at this point, sure the guys would make fun of elias for being in love with you but you couldn’t see it, elias knows he has some feelings for you but he wasn’t sure about it yet. he also didn’t want to risk the amazing friendship you guys had started.

“hey, are you coming to the game tonight?” elias asked over the phone to you.

you let out a sigh before you start speaking. “i’ll try, schools been really hard lately but i should be able to finish studying tonight.” elias could hear the tiredness in you voice and it hurt him to see you like this. “y/n, its okay. you don’t have to try and make it, focus on school its way important. you have many more games of mine that you can watch.” he left out a soft chuckle at the end of his sentence. 

“i’ll still try though, i’ll give you a text if i can make it.” you said to him as you looked at the last large text book you had to read through and look at the giant pile of coffee cups surrounding your desk. 

“okay, love you, i gotta go.” “love you too e, good luck.” you both quickly exchanged goodbyes as you started reading your last text book. you knew there was no way you were going to be able to make it to his game tonight and you felt really bad, you sighed it off as you put your attention back to studying and occasionally looking at the canucks game that was now playing on your tv.

-

the game had ended, canucks lost by one but petey is a sore loser so obviously he was sad, which made him show up at your apartment, he brought pizza from your favourite place downtown.

you were passed out on the couch though, which resulted in elias having to pull out his spare key and sneaking into your apartment.

“elias?” you mumbled out as you felt him sit next to where you were laying on the couch, he motioned for you to lay you head on his lap and you did.

“hey sleepy girl, i brought our favourite pizza.” he said to you with a smile. no matter how bad of a day elias was having, you could always make him smile.

you positioned your head so you’re now facing up at him and you give him a big smile. “thank you, can we snuggle and watch a movie?” elias starts rubbing your cheek softly. “of course we can y/n.”

the night ended with you and elias falling asleep on the couch together while watching a movie he had picked out, you both forgot about all the stress from today and just enjoyed the moment.

-

“he loves you, you know that right?” brock said to you as he came by and sat next to you.

it was the start of summer, tanev decided to host a little barbecue for the whole team before everyone left vancouver and went back to their home towns for the summer.

you were sitting in the backyard watching elias talk to huggy. “what?” you said to brock with confusion. “no he doesn’t.”

brock scoffed at your response. “dude, you can’t be serious. how do you not see it.”

you thought about what brock said for awhile before you gave him a response. “does he talk about me?” you looked at brock while taking a sip of your drink. 

“does he talk about you? of course he fucking does y/n, all the time. especially when you don’t show up to our games, it’s worse when we’re on the road.” 

you smile to yourself at what brock said.

-

you were quite tipsy by the end of the night and elias didn’t want to let you go home alone, so you spent the night at his place.

“elias?” you said in your sweet drunken tone as you both settled into his bed, and you faced your body in his direction. 

“yes?” he said while playing with your hair softly. 

“brock said something to me earlier,” you said while pulling your body close to his.

 “of course he did,” he said with a sigh. “what’d he say this time?” 

“apparently you talk about me a lot?” you said with a soft laugh and your fingers now tracing up and down his back.

“yeah, yeah i do. i talk shit about you all the time.” he says sarcastically knowing where this conversation was going.

“hey!” you said as you playfully punched him. “i was going to do something but i guess not anymore.” you said with a huff.

he lifts your chin up to face him. before you knew it you guys were kissing each other, it was a soft, long and sweet kiss.

elias pulled away with a big grin on his face and you did too. you talked to each other for the rest of the night, you ended up falling asleep before elias did but he did too shortly after.

you woke up to the smell of elias making waffles, you hugged him from behind and he didn’t even notice you were awake until you did that.

“it smells really good,” you said to elias before kissing his cheek and begging for him to hug you. 

he pulls you into his grip and whispers in your ear. “do you wanna go to sweden with me for the summer?”

you look up at him with slight shock. “yeah, why not.” you said to him with a smile and he gets very excited and spins you around, you kiss for awhile until you smell something burning and you pull away.

“shit.” elias mumbles as he deals with the burnt waffles and you’re both laughing your asses off.

[spiralesbian]

ALRIGHT

here’s my full Stranger Avatar Sasha Archivist timeline:

(also, thanks to @artbyblastweave for being so interested in my lil au!)

SEASON ONE

sasha james is hired as the head archivist of the magnus institute!

her assistants are jon, tim, and martin

tim takes the thematic role of martin (aka getting tormented by my worm wife jane, and stays in the archives)

sasha reads thru statements and is a skeptic! she really does not believe it’s real until jane comes along.

“tim……………………..did you die here?”

“no, but every time i come to work i die a little more inside.”

cute timsha moment in the supply closet tho.

until martin kool-aid-mans through the door and gets them out of there

jon used to work in artefact storage so he hides in there. he’ll be fine

i actually can’t remember how they all get out but they do it KKJSDGFJHD

sasha takes everyone’s statements. tim is fucked up, martin is also fucked up, jon is actually fine though he seems pretty normal about this whole situation most definitely.

sasha realizes this is a bit more than a regular archivist job.

SEASON TWO

sasha gets paranoid of course. she learns more about gertrude because she never got the chance to meet her

she takes a statement from a guy named michael shelley. weird dude. then helen shows up :)

jon is most definitely himself he is just a normal regular grumpy jon i swear :)

sasha starts to manifest her powers a little bit. she doesn’t know it, but she is an avatar of the stranger, and a prisoner of the eye.

she starts to notice more things about jon? similar to this comic but with jon

eventually she + tim + martin help get jon out of the grip of the NotJon. this is my au and i get to choose who dies (it’s no one because i miss the s1 archival assistants too much).

jon is pretty fucked up from this though and at like a season-3-tim mindset already.

fucking goddamn leitner avatar of the fucking whore shows up to trap the NotJon in one of his shitty fucking novels. fuck this guy tho

he’s like Sasha We Must Talk and shes like okay but stay 8 ft away from me at all times you bitch

she leaves the room for 10 minutes and pipe murder occurs. good riddance

wait are the cops in the season i genuinely can’t remember. if they are, their roles don’t change very much. melanie and sasha feud, battle of the bi queens

SEASON THREE:

uh oh! girlie’s be framed for murder! she crashes at her ex gf georgie’s flat. also the admiral is there don’t think i would EVER cut him out of this story

(also jon is georgie’s ex too because i think that would be fun JDHBFHS)

sasha learns abt an upcoming web ritual (mirroring the unknowing), all that shit. gets kidnapped a ton of times, as usual.

helen is like “i am going to kill you because i hate gertrude <3 i was that dumb bitch’s assistant for too long” but michael busts out of the door like Hi Guys and traps her in the hallway.

sasha also gives her statement about a leitner she found as a child that marked her. its a stranger book and we learn her edgy orphan origin story how her parents were both murked by the stranger. fucked up if true!

back at the archives jon is like so fucking tired of this shit honestly and now martin is also pretty paranoid. also jm romance subplot is still very present!

tim is just trying to protect sasha at all times and he’s pissed she keeps leaving the country and getting fucking kidnapped

(remember when jon persuades the traffic cop?) sasha starts to fill her archivist role in a different way. she can shapeshift into the subject of a statement and uses her affiliation with the eye to coerce statements or info out of people. (example: if she needed a live statement from the guy in #90 Body Builder, she could temporarily make herself look like jared hopworth to the guy and ask “what happened to me?” or “what did i do?” and the guy would be like well he built some fucken bodies i guess let me tell you all about it) while reading the statements in america that refuel her, she fully shapeshifts into the statement giver while reading out loud.

once again i truly can’t remember daisy + basira’s roles until the end of the season. also melanie get shot by the ghost at some point

anyways sasha gets kidnapped by trevor and julia and they gerry lays out all the shit for her and she’s like ah! i’m fucked

tim offhand mentions the web ritual to martin and he loses his shit cause he’s marked by the web blah blah this isn’t a web!martin thing i swear i just need someone to fill tim’s role in the ritual and a lonely ritual would be fucking boring as hell as we learned from ass man peter lukas. i hate that man

so they make the plan to stop the web ritual (which is fucking hard when the offense knows your every move) so sasha, basira, daisy, jon, and martin go.

tim stays back at the institute to burn shit and distract elias. elias does some fucked up shit as usual and it makes me sad

the ritual starts! they have a plan to blow it up and run but like. u know how it goes

instead of the unknowing-stranger-dream-sequence, we get everyone kinda mixed up in a huge spider’s web on the big stage and its still quite confusing because this ritual not only manipulates the prey, but also the prey’s perceived reality. the web is also in current control of the buried coffin cause they think that shit is kinda fun. they yeet daisy into it.

hard to describe what happens, but basira keeps her cool, jon is a bit lost in his own mind, sasha tries to use her powers to escape but fails. she manages to get through to martin through the strings and mounds of spiders and she tosses him the detonator.

[squishing spider noises]

SEASON FOUR:

martin doesn't die, i told you i can't kill the og archival assistants! he does lose most of one leg though, he took the blunt of the explosion.

sasha in da hospital in da coma. tim is mad he can’t wake her up and then my man ollie says “ur fucked up mate” and she wakes up

(and because coma jon has such wild hair controversy, i’m establishing that her head was shaved when she was in the coma. it grows back thru s4. it she keeps one side shaved cause she’s cool)

meanwhile tim is recruited by that dumbass man you know who i don’t even wanna say his stupid fucking name

sasha gets daisy out of the buried. they become avatar pals!

(there is the biggest blank in my memory where all of season four should be. at this point i should just relisten to the entire fucking show but i would literally just forget it all again)

melanie says hm. fuck this! and blinds herself. she goes to live with georgie (and that’s the moment jon and sasha realize they are both georgie’s exes FHFHDJD)

tim continues to fight the lonely pull. he thinks that since p*ter l*kas is tied to the institute, he can blind himself out cause melanie was successful. he is wrong. he is also interrupted by elias midway, and only blinds one eye, and loses most of his sight in the other. elias’s hold on him is weak, but this just drives him way farther into the lonely.

gotta be honest i remember the end of season four but like i couldn’t visualize what was happening at the end so i like don’t understand what happened JGDKFJGD but sasha intervenes (???) and peter yeets tim into the lonely (???) and sasha jumps in (??????) after him. elias is just there i guess?

instead of “look at me martin,” sasha finds tim and at this point her form is warped and hard to recognize because of stranger powers, and tim is almost 100% blind, so she says “don’t look at me, see me. see me tim, it’s me.” and finally creates a clear image of herself. “it’s...it’s you. you’re my sasha.”

they break free and go to scotland i guess KHSDDKDSF

idk what happens with jon and martin im losing continuity at this point. fuck it, they smooch <3

“ah these are the statements.”

“yes. basira said last week she’d send some up as soon as the archives weren’t a crime scene. and she wasn’t sure which ones you’ve read already, so she, she just said she’d send a bunch.”

“.........Hello Sasha.”

(alternate ending: personally i think sasha would read through each statement before speaking them aloud cause that’s what i would fucking do, so she would get this statement and be like “lmao tim come look at this elias trying to prank me dumb bitch think i’ll start the apocalypse for him. fucking little puny bitch boy. anyways what do you want for dinner?”)

SEASON FIVE:

“just. listen.”

“...i’m dead. and you have been chosen to be my replacement as head archivist. hopefully, this means you, jon, but if someone else is hearing this, and elias has made a different choice for some reason, then these words are still very much intended for you.”

sasha in full stranger avatar mode and is like 8ft tall and her faces shift a lot as they go through the realms. except the stranger is the second to last one (the panopticon is last obviously).

helen and michael actually talk shit out in the spiral hallway and now they are mlm wlw solidarity and both like tim and sasha are such bi and trans icons <3 this is so fun don’t you love the fearpocalypse <3

oh daisy n basira trapped in the hunt, and jon and martin are trapped in the stranger. wtgfs + the admiral are like in space or some shit idk but they are ok :)

not much to report other than she is my monster wife <3

i really don’t have many theories to how everything in s5 is gonna pan out, and i would like to closely mirror the actual show, so maybe as we get closer to the end i’ll build more on to this! thanks a lot for all the notes on my first sarchivist post!! also if u wanna make art this specific au DEF tag me in it i’d love to see!!

[anakinskywalkher]

Palpatine raises the twins and accidentally activates Anakin’s dadmodus - An alternative Star Wars plot.

@jasontoddiefor: Palpatine raises the twins & angst w/ Vader not knowing who the two are @dlegohargreeves: im gonna fuck shit up

written together on WhatsApp while listen to crack music.

------

(Barbara) Palpatine has long before he declared himself emperor abandoned the ways of the Sith. He uses them to create utmost loyalty to himself but he will not abide to the rules of his predecessor, one Palpatine would’ve defeated had he been around at that time.  People, be they sith, jedi, or other are all moldable to whatever he wants them to be.

He tricks Padme with sugar and soothed spun words, manipulates Anakin with spice and presses on his rage ("the jedi forbid you from loving your mother thats why you couldnt save her. i would never")  -- Palpatine is aware of the long game, but he has eternity. He’s a god, no one will be able to withstand him.

What Anakin never realised was that he wasnt the actual chosen one, Palpatine had seen in his vision that Anakin's children were in fact the chosen ones, and so when confronted with the soft boy he molded him into this shell to avoid his vision from happening,.... and yet these damnable children are still born. Palpatine is terrified that he wasn’t the only one with the true vision and firmly believes that owning the twins would be the least risky choice. (like he owned anakin, who long ago posed a risk)

He hunts them down, -- while anakin/Vader is completely crippled by his mental breakdown about "murdering" Padme and his child. Palpatine smiles and lets him wallow, for what Vader doesnt know is that Palpatine the God poisoned padme once he found out about her pregnancy.

Palpatine finds them, born hours ago and already pulsing brightly with the power of the force. Obi-Wan puts up a fight but Palpatine strikes him. He gloats to Obi-wan, brags about killing Padme, about manipulating Anakin (”I have taken everything from you, and now I will take your life) and takes the children. He leaves Obi-wan to bleed out by his stomach wound a faraway galaxy          (Palpatine reasons that Obiwan deserves it for this is how he left Vader to die. )

And so Palpatine at the rise of his galactic empire ends up with a crippled sith boy (not a man no matter what anakin thought), and with two babies who are most powerful force users in history. (now were shifting to meta instead of story telling lmao)

Palpatine has a god complex, he doesnt actually believe he would ever die, such petty thing is only for the unfortunate. even if his body would succumb to age, his mind through the force would rule forever -- he is unstoppable. To rule however even a godlike emperor needs tools, and while Vader is to be his guarddog the twins he believe can be shaped and molded into his personal hands, amplify his reach across galaxies.

So to mold them into his tools, Palpatine believes in starving them for love, only ever receiving ounces of recognition and pride. always craving his acknowledgment -- and it works, the twins once old enough to have actual brains (according to palpatine) he removes their wetnurses and gives them teachers, makes their training cruel and harsh and make them compete for his gaze. And it works till a certain extent, but Palpatine’s god-complex makes him blind to things he deems unneccessary, And thus he misses how the mourning of Vader for his family, turns him into a guilt-ridden man who believes giving these children some form of attention and care as penance for his own misgivings. And thus without meaning to Vader gives the children the love Palpatine tries to deny them (accidentally shifting their loyalty on the long run)

Elias: Vader hates the kids at first, with them reminding him of everything he lost and could have had, but at the end of the day, after some aggressive introspection, he gets that they’re just kids and probably starts projecting a lot the longer he’s exposed to them -- Vader, guilty, sneaks them candy and gives them stuff that’s kinda useless (like books that are not about politics or war or economics and and and) and he doesn’t think it’s much but the two would kill a man for him and probably have done so. ((Palpatine tries to break apart the codependent twins, forcing them apart for weeks, but the Force, unlike anything is a tool in hands of desperate children with a bond so strong it connected their mind)) This is not healthy, Vader thought, recalling decade old lessons from the Jedi. The twins rarely spoke, never mind both at the same time. They’re asked for their opinions, echoes of the Emperor’s wishes, and only one of them replies. They always moved at the same time, terrifying weapons of perfect synchrony, constantly aware of the other’s presence. They were living at least half in each other’s mind, even when the Emperor depraved them of contact for weeks. They were clingy afterwards, holding each other’s hands and wrists until they bruised, but Vader knew their minds were never separated. Luke slammed their teacher’s (victim’s) head to the ground as Leia kicked away his feet. They didn’t need any call signs, or training in coordination, one moved and the other followed. During battles, the twins’ dependence was a huge advantage. “Again,” Vader called out and the two of them fell back into the first Kata, the bleeding teacher still lying on the ground.

Barbara: However once the twins are older they need to learn through missions, so Vader has to take them along for missions  (once Palpatine believes they wont connect with Vader) - it starts normal but Vader slowly starts to make the missions longer, gives the kids downtime, lets them free and just engages small talk with them, he can’t face himself if he doesn't let them be actual children. But the twins are suspicious believing theres a catch but Leia, the master mind realises that theres none and so they accept reluctantly, and slowly but surely they learn how to be children under Vader’s tutelage. It takes time and dulling a sharpened blade, but the moment, that first time when the twins laugh and seem actually happy, its that moment that Vader decides, he has to become Anakin again, because these children are his second chance - And so he starts planning.

(insert a bit of crack:

Elias: Firmus: Lord Vader, are we to expect you and the Operatives back tomorrow? Vader: we haven’t finished the mission yet -Leia and Luke like 12 or so, in the background yelling in excitement bc idk they got a game, neither are in uniform- Firmus: Of course )

Barbara: Anakin: "i made sand castles when I was young" Leia: “that structure seems awfully unstable for a house”

But ever since Vader mentions the sand castle, the usually more mature one Leia clings to the idea and while he wishes he could show her, but his suit and wounds cant handle the sand. And when he explains Luke goes " well lets get u a proper suit then" and vader goes " im a moron" (leia in the back: yes duh) So Anakin looks into the treatment he’s still receiving to see if he can make it so that his breathing machine could withstand the sand and realises that Palpatine is actually keeping his body weak, he has no need of the breathing machine because its that actual machine thats poisoning his lungs. So of course Vader does a lowrisk experiment and turns off the machine and he can actually breath fresh air in 12 years (the rage controlling Anakin is one different than those before, for it is ice in his veins instead of fire. And it makes him tactical instead of foolish for once). Soon after that Vader catches some rebel transmission and  finds out that Obi-wan is alive and looking for the twins and its that moment that Anakin 'kills' Vader, believing that Obi-wan can save the twins in a way he can't.

Anakin takes the kids to fight the rebels on Palpatines order but he seizes the chance and instead he shows them his face without the mask (lets ignore the idea that hed be bald bc i hate the uglification of ani) and Leia goes: You look an awful lot like luke Anakin who hasnt actually seen his own image for 12 years, realises that luke is a spitting image of himself as a child, and leia who is glaring at him, he realises, is a carbon copy of Padme. BUT anakin thinks hes projecting and doesnt follow up with it.

Instead he asks them (and for leia this will always be the most important part), he asks them if they wish to stay with Palpatine and do his bidding or to dissapear with him -- and well the choice is easy right, Luke&Leia don’t actually like Palpatine, because despite everything, the force made them sensitive and they feel so much (the despair of the people, the sadness of Vader, the greed of Palpatine)

So they leave for Tattooine, the one place where Palpatine would never look because he never found out that Anakin realised his suit was a boobytrap. The wanted pictures of the twins (both bald shaven and in uniform) nor the one of Anakin (known as Vader, with the helmet)  soon dont match the long haired white dress wearing twins and the blond haired bronzed man.

and so Anakin and the twins go into hiding, but guess whose on Tatooine? Thats right -- ObiWan

[iamalivenow]

👩: ଘ꒰ ๑ ˃̶ ᴗ ᵒ̴̶̷๑꒱و ̑̑ 🕸️: already 🧑🏻: \ \ \٩(๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و/ / / 🕸️: im only doublechecking cause I asked you an hour ago 🧑🏽: ヽ/❀o ل͜ o\ﾉ 🕸️: is that one more aggressive intentionally 🧑🏿: ⁽⁽◞(꒪ͦᴗ̵̍꒪ͦ=͟͟͞͞ ꒪ͦᴗ̵̍꒪ͦ)◟⁾⁾ 🕸️: okay jesus

Tim: ready champ? Martin: I just want to check one more thing, and then I'll tell him. After I hand the report in. Tim: sure sure, full faith. Martin: You think I'm going to not do it. Tim: I Mean, it's  not like its the first time we've had this talk is all Martin: I'll tell him. It's not even that hard, really. Tim: uh huh Martin: Just a quick- Hey Jon, drinks tomorrow? Really like your company. And that's it. Tim: how long did you practice that in front of a mirror last night. Martin: I'm going to do my research now. Tim: sure martin. Martin: You know what! Tim: ? Martin: Ten quid says I'll ask him. Tim: i never say no to free money. Martin: >: ( Tim: good luck with research.

👁️: God, he's so sad.   : The Archivist? 👁️: No. Jon's fine. Better then fine.   : Do we have to do this every time Elias? 👁️: I'm talking about his assistant.   : Funny way to spell cannon fodder. 👁️: Wow.   : What? 👁️: I forgot you can be funny on occasion.

🕸️: hey ⚰️: Yes 🕸️: i need a favor ⚰️: What favor 🕸️: hmmm idk if i should ask you for it tho ⚰️: You already texted me 🕸️: im indecisive ⚰️: You're really not 🕸️: hmmmm 🕸️: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm 🕸️: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ⚰️: I know we both have all the time in the world, spiritually, but I personally would like to get on with my day 🕸️: you're not friends with desolation right ⚰️: not personally no 🕸️: so if i asked you really nicely to make a delivery would you ⚰️: do it yourself 🕸️: this is why you dont have friends

👨🏻:  (๑ ؔؖؕ◉͠ ◡͐ ◉ؕؔؕؖ͠)ノ 🐛: BBBUUUSSSYYY 👨🏽: 。：゜(；´∩｀；)゜：。

🕸️: could you do me a favor 🥩: WHAT 🕸️: could you give the cult something 🥩: WHICH ONE 🕸️: desolation 🥩: NO 🕸️: can you tell oliver to give desolation something? 🥩: FINE 🕸️: good boy

🕸️: correct me if i'm wrong but you owe me a favor 👁️: You're wrong. 🕸️: hows the husband 👁️: You were invited to the divorce. 🕸️: must have got lost in the mail. 🕸️: hey while I have you on the line 🕸️: could you find something for me 🕸️: someone rather 🕸️: i want to make someone cry 🕸️: and i feel like you're into that 🕸️: spiritually 🕸️: or sexually 🕸️: i don't judge 👁️: And the point? 🕸️: where is desolation hiding these days 👁️: We both know they don't hide. You know better then I do that they don't Hide. 🕸️: well where are they that its hard for me to find them 👁️: Oh losing our touch? 🕸️: you're hilarious. 👁️: Up north, running favors for the mannequin. 🕸️: danke 👁️: Funny.

🥩: SHE WANTS A FAVOR ⚰️: She already asked me I said no 🥩: AND THEN SHE ASKED ME TO ASK YOU ⚰️: So I'm being threatened 🥩: SHE JUST SAID TO ASK ⚰️: I noticed

⚰️: Where do you want your delivery 🕸️: how did i know you were going to come around ⚰️: Where do you want your delivery 🕸️: so tense all the time 🕸️: loosen up oli ⚰️: Where 🕸️: just up north a little ⚰️: Why are you hounding me for this 🕸️: because jude can't kill you when she finds out ⚰️: Great

  : Elias, just letting you know I'm going to be out of port soon. 👁️: Oh and then I'll have to agonize all on my own is that what you're saying?   : Just letting you know I'll be out of range for a while. 👁️: That's fine.   : Right. 👁️: I wouldn't want you to think that I wanted to have conversations with you regularly.   : Of Course Not. 👁️: Considering the divorce.   : Yes dear.

Tim: how's research going?

⚰️: Hey 🌩: Hello. ⚰️: Could you give Jude something 🌩: Sure? ⚰️: Thank you 🌩: I don't know where she is? ⚰️: In the North probably closest fire 🌩: That's. I mean, yeah. Sure. What's the delivery? ⚰️: Don't know yet 🌩: Ominous ⚰️: On brand if nothing else

Sasha: Jon, do you know where #0150409 's supplemental material is? Jonathan Sims: I returned it into the box it's meant to be in after recording the statement, why? Sasha: Can't find it and wanted to cross reference something. Do you still have the recording? Jonathan Sims: Let me check. Jonathan Sims: Sasha? Sasha: Yeah? Jonathan Sims: Why didn't you just come one door over and ask me in person? Sasha: Walking's really hard boss.

👨🏿: ( ⓥωⓥ) still busy??? 🐛: YYYEEESSS 👩🏼: (⊙.☉)7

🕸️: its a negligee ⚰️: Excuse me 🕸️: the thing im making you deliver 🕸️: it's a negligee ⚰️: Why 🕸️: cause I found it while digging through my basement and I figure jude would want it back 🕸️: really if anything i'm doing her a favor ⚰️: Is this Agnes' 🕸️: lmao 🕸️: yeah obvi 🕸️: why do you think i'm making you do it ⚰️: And I'm the one with out friends? 🕸️: i've got so many 🕸️: i'm practically drowning in them ⚰️: you're not funny 🕸️: like that one time you drowned 🕸️: get it ⚰️: I was there 🕸️: <3

⚰️: Are you going to think I'm weird 🌩: Depends. ⚰️: It's a dead girl's nightgown 🌩: Then yes. ⚰️: Figures

Tim: that deep in the research huh? Martin: Sorry. Got distracted. Feeling sick- Might miss work. Tomorrow. Tim: hey, that's fine. you don't have to pay me. I wasn't going to make you. Martin: Thank you. I am sick though. Fever. Tim: oh uh okay. that sucks. feel better soon. Martin: Yes.

🌩: Weird dirty deed done. ⚰️: Thank you 🌩: Is it a you thing or? ⚰️: No not really 🌩: Oh. You should have told me. ⚰️: Would you have done it 🌩: Hey, fair. ⚰️: Sorry for being vague about it 🌩: It's not the end of the world. I am sending her in your direction, if she gets mad at me.

⚰️: She will 🌩: That's rough buddy.

⚰️: Done 🕸️: thank you oli ⚰️: And if she asks 🕸️: thank you for that too bud 🕸️: real team player 🕸️: real sport ⚰️: Ugh

Martin: Sick. Jonathan Sims: Stay home tomorrow then. I'll let Elias know. Martin: Thank you.

Martin: [Sent Location] Martin: WWWAAANNNTTT TTTOOO CCCEEELLLEEEBBBRRRAAATTTEE??? 👩🏾: ¿(❦﹏❦)? Martin: :::))) 👦: omg (╯✧∇✧)╯omg Martin: :::DDD 👧🏻: i'm so proud!!!!!!!!!! ~(≧◇≦)/ﾞﾞﾞﾞ Martin: TTTHHHAAANNNKKK YYYOOOUUU 👧🏼: you're really starting yours! I'm so jealous!!! (ٛɲ˃ ˑ̣̮ ˂ٛɳ) Martin: HHHAAAHHHAAA 👧🏽: i'll be over really soon ♬♪♫ ヾ(*・。・)ﾉ ♬♪♫ Martin: ♬♪♫♬♪♫♬♪♫ 👧🏾: ♪₊(˘ᵋॢ ˘ॢ⌯)*·♫

🌀: wHaT dO yOu CalL iT wHeN wOrMs TaKe OvEr ThE wOrLd? Jonathan Sims: Wrong Number. Again. 🌀: it's really hard to type with my hands please play along with my joke its all i have Jonathan Sims: [Is Typing] Jonathan Sims: Fine. What? 🌀: gLoBaL wOrMinG ! Jonathan Sims: I'm blocking you. 🌀: D:

[notenoughmuses]

S8:

I will watch it (and will be spoiler free unless you wanna talk about it in IM or Discord) at this point I’ve decided D n D are doing their own thing and while the writing may be shitty and have done a disservice to many a character, it’s in a way like a filler episode for me, before you get to the meaty real stuff (aka the next fucking book Martin!) It’s a chance to see what someone else can do with the characters and what we already know. Now, I know they’ve fucked up storylines and omitted huge things but, I want to see how they end it.  I know they talked to Martin and they discussed certain book things and thats how they got the show yada yada...An it’d be interesting to see what characters come out on top and who doesn’t. Even if I don’t agree with it or the storytelling.

You know what’s awesome about the show? The music. The actors. Sometimes the lines from the show. I mean....There are some good things in there even if it’s hard to see sometimes when you have the massive storytelling issues and plot points that the show does. Despite what I feel for the show  (which mind you started to sour when I started rp in this fandom and i realized just how they were butchering some characters....) Some of my favorite moments...not gonna list all but...under this cut:

Benjen being fucking alive! Basically coldhands. Like fuck yes. Bad moment: When he sacrificed himself for Jon. It was horrible and sad and I miss him, but, was I glad to see Benjen again? Course.

The Light of The Seven  scene. From start to finish.

Hordors death scene. Never knew I could cry so much over Hordor.

Battle at Hardhome. BOTB. Amazing shots and great battle sequences.

Daenerys taking all the Dothraki basically.

KITN scene. Just...the music, the lead up. LYANNA STARK and BBY Ned. Seeing Rhaegar...even if it’s not what we all had in mind....and well wtf about Elia ? (but even in book canon it’s like wtf about Elia?) Lyanna Mormont’s speech about No King in the North but Stark...like Yessss

Sansa’s speeches this last two-three seasons...just Sansa’s development in general...Hoping to see something similar in the books. Not going to be of course since DD had Sansa take Jeyne Pool/ Arya’s place....

Cersei. I used to loathe her. But the season of her walk of atonement and up to her last scene in S7...something clicked and I found I loved her. Made me notice more things when I went back to watch it over with some friends who were still trying to catch up.

Arya. Leaving the faceless men. Not killing the Lannister soldiers. Arya Stark coming home.

Brienne, Pod scenes. Just love them.

THEON GREYJOY. I cheered for him so hard when he fought and kept getting back up.

Yasha, Dany and Olenna. Women being like fuck u I don’t need a mans help to do what I want cause i’m powerful. You’re a dragon, be a dragon. Not to mention Olenna dying and just confessing all she did to Jamie..like...damn.

Jamie Cersei and Tyrion in S7...the tension in the room when Cersei interacted with her brothers...amazing acting from all three.

Anytime we see the army of the dead marching in mass numbers. Hardhome being the first of holy shit westeros is fucked. Moments.

Gendery and Jon meeting and Jon and Theon reunion.  Can’t wait for Sansa and Bran to meet Gendry and Dany and all the others that came with. Gendy/Arya reunion. Sansa/Tyrion reunion (still kinda holding out hope that they’ll get together again...but if Sansa’s alone that’s cool too.)

more things that happened in S1-3 but they were still kinda following book canon at that point so...

[isakvaltersen03]

Dear Diary

23.06.2019 - I miss home more than ever, i miss being me

New York is a beautiful pace, I cant deny that without lying. Yet I cant help but miss Oslo. I like how Oslo is smaller, its still big to me but not nearly as big as here. I have now been here in New York for 2 months and I have met a lot of wonderful people. Time flies by but I have to admit, i´m homesick. I was scrolling through my phone a few minutes ago and found so many pictures from back home

My homeies. They are off to amazing adventures, some on their own some together and i´m sitting here wishing I could join them. Thinking back to all the good times we had through out the years. What I wouldn’t do to be with this silly gang right now. People might not see it, they might not notice, i´m good at hiding feelings, But I feel so small and alone in this extremely huge place. Sure I have made a bunch of good friends, but it doesn’t compare to those you have grown up with, those who know every single thing about you and can read you like a book. Sure not all my friends do, but Lucas does. My best friend, we have been through thick and thin throughout the years. We grew up on the same street and played together every day. We went to our first football practice together… or should I say soccer like people in the USA call it? We fell in love with the sport together and have practiced together on the same team ever since… until I moved away. We went to soccer camp every year together from the age of 6 till last years… think about it, 10 years of summer camp together. When I doubt myself, he always puts my head on strait. He doesn’t take my bullshit, he calls me out on things and I might not have appreciated it back then, but I really do right now. I miss just being able to walk into his house and sit down on the couch and watch a movie on his big tv just because I feel like it or go grab a kebab with him or watch a good soccer game. Fuck, i even miss calling soccer football. He is like the brother I never had and I miss him so much. I miss all the weekend trips we, the whole group, used to go on, long nights with a fire and everyone getting drunk while me and Lucas just laughed our asses of at how crazy they got when they got drunk. I miss having to be the “dad” in the group, making sure we got everything when going on trips and such, I might be far from the oldest of the group but not to brag, I am the most organized and responsible in the group. Guys, I miss you all endlessly and I really truly hope that this summer we can all gather and do something fun, either in New York or back in Norway.

I have really been struggling emotionally and I don’t know how to deal with it. I´m not good at talking about emotions and as much as I hated it back then, I miss Lucas getting me to in his comfortable way, he never pushed me to explain or tell min anything, he just made sure I knew he was there and somehow it always made me talk. Things in New York move so fast. One day i´m alone wandering the halls searching for my class, the next I got myself a boyfriend… How did that happen? I´m not saying I regret it, cause not in a million years would I ever. He has my heart. He is so kind and caring, beautiful and funny. Elias, my Elias. Hes perfect…. Almost… He has some stuff to deal with…Some stuff I have to deal with as well and it scares me. It really terrifies me. Last time, it made me feel so lost and alone, I don’t know how to help him, what to say and do and how to act. I really want to help, that’s all I want really but I feel like I cant and it scares me. His family is fantastic. As amazing as this relationship of ours is… i´m so scared of him one day saying its over. I don’t know what I would do. I would be totally all alone in this big world. But I cant talk to anyone about that really. Its his thing to talk about, his life. I cant really talk to him about it either… Usually i  would tell Lucas… but I feel like this is something I cant even tell him, or can i? I don’t know how this boyfriend thing works…. In stead I end up in bed googling and making myself more confused by the matter.

Moms daily bible verse and our family drama really hurts. We used to be so close, I used to trust them with everything, tell them everything and we used to do everything together. I don’t get why things have to be like they are between us. Why cant they just accept and move on. I havnt changed other than just growing up a bit. I’m only 16, I still need my parent, I may be living in New York, but I still need my father, I need fatherly advises right now more than ever and I need my moms calming and comforting words. But no, that’s not a possibility. Im not saying they have to be okay with everything I say and do and what I believe in and how I feel, we can have different opinions, but I just need my parents to be there for me. I thought they always wold and it hurts more than anything to know they do not at all. I am completely on my own in a foreign country, everything is foreign and so new.

Most of the time, I just wanna be with Elias all day every day, I don’t really want to leave his side, but then I would just suffocate him, and we would get tired of each other I think. Its not good for a relationship to be with each other 24/7, but I hate being alone. That’s when I think about how tough everything is and that’s when I feel sad and alone. That’s when I miss my parents, my friends, my team, my house, my neighbourhood, and even the crappy store that was always out kvikk lunsj. That’s when I start doubting myself the most and my decisions. That’s when I break down and cry myself to sleep. Or end up whining in my diary like a little bitch. I used to think life was perfect, but turns out, that’s not how it is. Nothing and no one is perfect maybe that’s a good thing… but right now, i´m not a fan. I miss the days of being excited for practice, being excied to go to class and learn with my friends, I miss being smiley all the time without faking it a least bit. I miss my friends calling me out on things and making fun of me, I miss bossing my old team around and them not taking me seriously. I miss the water fights after practice, I miss feeling 16 and dumb and wild. I miss being me.  

[absyoung55]

It's Not Worth It

Part 2 

Part 1

 A/N: I threw the Scottish accent out the window sorry.

The jeep ride was silent both Stiles and Y/N seething with anger. “Aren’t you supposed to be at a party?” Y/n glared at Stiles “I saw you leave Heathers Birthday party. Why were you there?” Stiles kept his eyes on the road but was gesturing spasticly “I was there to protect You” Y/N mumbled propping her elbow on the window ledge and putting her hand in her face “protect me from who!? My friends?!” Stiles screamed at you “Your friends weren’t the only ones there!” You snapped at him. “Yeah I know YOU were there” Stiles looked at you for just a second his expression one of hatred. His comment boiled your blood your fists heated and glowed red hot you held them up to not burn anything. You had saved that fucking girls life. You had allowed Heather to live you could have let the Darach take her. But she was Stiles friend.

At Heather’s party: Y/N had followed Scott and Stiles trailing behind out of ear shot so Scott couldn’t hear you. Or smell you. You observed a short blonde girl kiss Stiles you nearly burned the front door down peeking through the side window. Then they left Scott and disappeared into the house the girl reaked of lust. You could smell Stiles a mile away his chemo signals off the charts. Y/N rounded the corner of the house to peek through a window and there it was. A hideous human being no lips to cover her teeth nor eyelids to cover her bright blue eyes her face mauled and scared. Power rolled off her, supernatural Power, a power you had felt before a long time ago. She was a Darach. Once a druid but was now on a dark path. She started messing with the girl alone in the cellar. A growl ripped through your chest and the thing turned you couldn’t tell if she was shocked at your presence. She waved her arms about; to use her power on you. Y/N crouched and your own power burned bright your eyes glowing violet locked on the hideous thing. Springing forward on your heals you tackled the disgusting thing, wrestling her to the ground straddling her you gripped her forearms and shoved your knee into her wind pipe and incinerated her. Within minutes the Darach was a pile of ash. The blonde girl was released from its spell. Just then Stiles returned with something, and the girl screamed at him and stomped away. Stiles followed after her trying to understand what happened in the 5 minutes he was gone. You kicked around the pile of ashes to make sure there was no evidence of murder. Then you looked around for witnesses thankfully there were none. That’s when you heard it. An Alphas howl. Loud and strong really strong. Curiosity consumed you, Scott could protect the Stiles right? With that comfort you headed to the source of the Alpha cry.

Back To Now:

 “Stiles pull the fuck over NOW” I was furious. My fists burst into flames as Stiles swerved to the side of the road “ What are you gonna do WALK home?! woah.” Stiles was just as furious until he saw my blazing fists. “A-are you okay whats happening?” my eyes glowed violet and I stared at his heat signature “ I dont have control” what is happening I’ve never lost control. Black stripes zig-zagged across my body. I slammed open the Jeep door and fell into the gravel on the side of the road. My claws dug into the cool rocks charring them upon touch. My tail whipped wildly around my legs. I felt pressure on my back and I looked up, Stiles had gotten out of the Jeep and was in the ditch besides me. “ Y/N look at me” I met his eyes “Calm down” like a well trained dog I obeyed, the glow left my eyes and slowly the black stripes receded. God damn what is this boy doing to me? I collapsed on to the gravel, earning a laugh from Stiles. “I have a way with calming out of control werewolves” Stiles looked at his finger nails and pretended to shine them on his hoodie, I rolled my eyes and rose from the gravel. “Im not a werewolf, I’m part werewolf part werelion with a whole mess of complicated” I put my hand on my hip and z snapped my fingers. It was Stiles turn to roll his eyes, I smirked at him. We both got back into the jeep, “Hey um so whats with the flames I mean Scott doesnt have flames… and Malia definitely doesnt have flames..” I looked down at my lap playing with my fingers, I peeked over at Stiles, He was looking at the road then me then the road then back to me. “well its a long story” we just then pulled into his drive way. I pretty much lived at the Stilinski house the sheriff, even though I was thousands of years older, treated me like a daughter, I loved Stiles, I tried to love him like a son, considering our age but its difficult, so right now I’m settling for friends/ roommates, It wasn’t hard to convince the sheriff and Stiles to let me stay with them, I cleaned, cooked, did laundry fixed things, and worked on the jeep. In return I slept on their couch. Stiles shut off the jeep and turned to look at me “Well we have all night” I looked at him in disbelief that he wanted to know. Stiles hopped out of the Jeep and opened the door for me. “Thank you sir” I sarcastically hopped out of the jeep “M'Lady” Stiles pretended to tip a hat. We walked side by side up the side walk and I shuffled to the side so Stiles could unlock the front door. Once we were inside I felt awkward, “I dont know where to start…” I plopped down onto the couch and Stiles sat quietly next to me. “I guess start at the beginning” Stiles shrugged his shoulders. I let out a long heavy sigh “well my father was a bitten werewolf and my mother was a purebred born Lowenmensch- er werelion. My mom was an alpha but she died giving birth to me so I was actually born an alpha. My mother’s sister; who was not a werelion, but a banshee, raised me because my father hated me for killing my mother and wanted to kill me to become an alpha. Anyway Lowenmensch are different we um this is kinda bad, but most Lowenmensch only live on a diet of pineal glands,” I looked over at Stiles to see his reaction but he had a neutral expression “its a part of the brain Stiles..“ I searched his face for disgust but there was none. “I’ve heard of worse Y/N” Stiles slowly reached over and took my hand in his and began running his thumb over my knuckles. “Don’t worry about what I think it doesn’t matter” Stiles attempted to comfort me “ Stiles what you think means the world to me ….” I couldnt look at him so I looked at the floor memorizing the pattern of the wood. “But why?” Stiles sounded concerned “it’s a part if my story if you want me to continue…” I looked up at Stiles and he raised his eyebrows and nodded his head for me to continue “I lived with my Aunt until she passed away when I was 20 years old, she died from a mysterious disease at the time but now I know it was a vitamin c diffidence. Anyway she wanted me to have her pineal gland be my first and it was, after eating it my senses were heightened, my roar was more powerful, and my eyes glowed purple and I came to learn that I could heal the sick and wounded. After she was gone for a few weeks my father came looking for me. When he found me his intentions were clear, he was going to kill me. He never even laid a finger on me my roar scared him into submission, and I never saw him again. I stopped ageing at about 18 so when I turned 50 and still looked like a teenager I knew I had to leave my village before they lit the torches” Stiles laughed and let go of my hand and relaxed into the couch “I left Scotland and traveled to Europe, my first stop was to help the tribes build Stonehenge. Then I made my way to Rome, I fought in the Colosseum and became an undefeated champion. They moved me to Greece to fight their gladiators and beasts. Thats where I met Plato and Aristotle and started studying to be a philosopher. Eventually I had to leave Greece because of the apples.” Stiles looked confused “apples?” He lifted an eyebrow at me and I laughed a little “at the time to throw an apple at a woman was a propose of marriage, I was young and beautiful then so I was constantly bombarded with apples” Stiles looked like he wanted to say something, he opened and closed his mouth a few times searching for words “you still are young and beautiful” Stiles mashed his lips together and looked at the ground “thank you Stiles” I leaned over so my face was under his as he looked at the floor a huge smirk plastered on my face. He thought I was beautiful. “No problem” Stiles smiled crookedly. “After Greece was the renaissance so that was horrible, I spent weeks painting with artists all over Europe specifically I was an assistant to Michelangelo painting the Cappella Magna - er Sistine Chapel. I was the one who would bring him meals and more paint and other disgusting things I don’t want to talk about.” I shuddered and Stiles gave me a look “Chamber pots” and that’s all I had to say for his eyebrows to shoot up. “Anyway I moved around a lot, I never really connected with anyone until my first visit to Beacon Hills. There was a Phoenix here at one time, phoenix are evil creatures they set anything the touch on fire they look pretty much like burnt crispy zombies, I murdered one of the last ones in front of a little boy it was going to kill, after the phoenix died I took its pineal gland. Since then I’ve had a problem with my temper and my animal transformed into a tiger, and I have an affinity for fire.” Stiles hand had settled on my clothed thigh. “You saved someone? From the phoenix?” I felt a sadness weigh on my heart “I only wish I had been there sooner to stop others from loosing their lives, I only saved one boy” Stiles stood up “One boy can make all the difference that one boy could have grown up to do amazing things” you thought about Elias …. Elias wow I am so stupid Elias was the man from your squad in Vietnam “Elias Stilinski” the name left your lips the same time the front door opened. “Hey dad how was work” Noah entered the house “Boring but I’m not complaining” I stood suddenly startling both of them “Noah, … were you named after anything?” The wheels kept turning in my head pieces clicking into place “My father named me Noah after his sergeant that lead him through Vietnam untouched He said he was the most noble and selfless man he had ever met and hoped I would be like him his name was Noah..” “O'Mally” both boys looked at you “the men always called me Ma'am” both boys faces were shocked and their jaws fell slack “Elias. How is Elias I know he’s not dead” I looked at Noah hopeful “He’s.. He’s… growing old effects everyone different” I nodded my head slowly a tear escaped and rolled down my cheek and I wiped it away and sniffled. “He is a good man I ran into him a few times in life, Stiles he was the boy I saved from the phoenix.” Stiles looked at his dad and his dad stared at Stiles. “My father named me after You?” I laughed really hard so hard I crumpled to the floor clutching my gut. I heard Stiles snicker and I looked up to Noah with a grin plastered on his face. 

 I made spaghetti for supper the whole time I was cooking Stiles and I talked I told him all about little Derek and Vietnam with his grandfather how I left the Hales and came back and they were gone and what I had done after to cope then I got to the part with Lydia “Stiles something happened to me that night,” I let out a heavy sigh “have you ever heard of an imprint” I stirred the noodles “You mean like a baby duckling when it hatches?” I giggled “well sort of, a werewolf imprint works differently, it’s kinda like you’ve found your soul mate you would do anything for them you would die for them, it’s an extreme kind of love.” I looked at Stiles he was looking down lost in thought his bottom lip trapped between his teeth with his eyebrows mashed together. “It’s very rare and only happens every thousands of years… It’s happened to me… I- I imprinted … on you.”

[theculturalvacuum]

A Dance with Fan Fic Ask Round Ups

I have a confession: I was a little terrified that everyone would be mad at me for going to a cliff hanger with the groom storming out to a pretty unrelated chapter involving middle-aged ladies and repression, not least because it took me two months to get it out. But the feedback on this chapter has been so sweet. Thank you.

Now that the next chapter is out, I’ve finally decided to catch up on all of these….

Anonymous said:

I don't think your buying into stereotypes with your dornish women, they aren't all identikit, they're all just reflective of a place which expects women to be a bit more involved in everything. From outside of Dorne you've got Sarra who was assertive in her own way by telling eliott how to behave with his new wife, it was a gentle type of assertiveness but she took control and had that conversation no matter how awkward. Lady Darklyn too certainly seems not lacking in confidence.

Well, good. I sometimes worry about women who are less assertive and how they cope in this society. With Sarra, what I was more going for was more encouraging her son to be gently assertive about his marital rape license.

Anonymous said:

Elliot, you are my sonion, and I understand that you're upset, but you're acting like an asshole. Stop being an asshole.

I’ll pass this on, but I’m not sure El will be able to hear me over the sound of his raging hangover right now.

Anonymous said:

Your fic is so much fun, I find myself going yeah oh poor Eliott's he's going to marry a whore, and then im like, wait what the fuck corret man. I get so into each chapter that by the end of it im agreeing with these twits. that's when I know im hooked and your good at your thang.

Thank you? POV bias is a bitch, though.

Corret has a very logical brain, and he’s very normative. He just doesn’t question the assumptions of his society. And he didn’t say Loree was a “whore”! He said she was “little better” than one. Big difference, dude!

Anonymous said:

A few ask rounds ups ago, someone mentioned Dylan having high hopes that Ellaria Uller will get a prominent job in KL, oh my god I need this. I need Corret to just have no clue what going on and why is buddy would want such a thing when he has a second son to put those hopes onto. Maybe Dylan thinks Ellaria is his cleverest kid or something and he's excited of her progress report from the water gardens/tutors at Hellholt or something, and Corret is just so uncomprehending.

Lil’ Ellaria aces all the math tests.

I can’t think of any reason why Dylan would stop hanging out with his old buddy Corret or why he wouldn’t be one of the famous Dornish Proud Papas.

Anonymous said:

Hey my Jeyne Swann love is perfectly reasonable and normal!!! Sorta. I just feel bad for her she went to a place where she could have done anything (within reason) and shiteros had screwed up her view of herself and marriage and life so much that she was never able to take even one second of advantage of it then she got a disgusting growth in her body and died. I feel much better now and zen knowing that she as some fond times with her girls to give her happy memories as she wasted away.

I’m sure she thought she was the luckiest woman in the world.

Anonymous said:

I kind of feel sorry for eliott and how unprepared he is for the world he's walked into. I mean there are limits to my sympathy given his attitude and his opinion on stuff, but if someone (ADWIN!!!!) had just given him a few more facts from the start or they'd journeyed through Blackmont and he'd been able to see Meria and Simon and have a little chat with him, it wouldn't have fixed everything but he'd have at least been more like a good little scout and been (a bit) prepared.

I mean, Adwin threw a pile of books at him. Was that not enough?

Eliott’s problem is sometimes connecting theoretical knowledge to the real world. He can know things about Dornish culture, or even that some historical Princess So-and-So had half a dozen paramours in her life or something, and still not have it occur to him that it would apply in this situation.

Anonymous said:

Something I sort of noticed as the Rowan caravan was journeying was they never stayed anywhere where there was a marriage like Eliott was about to enter into. Manwoody, Fowler and Vaith there is no spouse in residence, Allyrion the dude is the Lord, so everywhere they went of the big houses he's not getting the chance to really see the role he'd have which probably keeps the shackles on for even longer.

I suppose that’s true, I didn’t plan it or anything. But the most important thing keep the shackles on is Eliott and his Brain Virgin. I’m not sure if swinging by Sandstone would have helped him much except maybe that he would think that Allin ain’t a real man or something.

Anonymous said:

Given everything that happened between AWiS and the present, would it be fair to say that Edgar Yronwood was right, or at least had a point when he said that the Martells trying to win the favour of the Northerners wouldn't yield the result they wanted? A bit rich coming from the man who backed the Blackfyres, but still...

Well… ask Elia how it all worked out. Though, to be fair, the amount of autonomy they seemed to have under Robert is a little ridiculous.

Anonymous said:

I'm excited and sad for the upcoming Alysanne chapter. Excited because she's a brilliantly written character; sad because she's spent her whole life getting shit on and thanks to patriarchy brain, thinks it's all her fault. Which makes me sad.

I feel guilt about how long it took me to get this round-up out. Like, that was two chapters ago… I hope it lived up to your expectations.

Anonymous said:

On your favourite subject of Jeyne Swann, whats the age gap between her two girls? did Allyster try and get two kids on her relatively quick so they'd be able to stop making appointments? Must have been a bit weird for her not to have anyone pushing for the her to birth the prodigal penis, even with huge amounts of pb that must have been kinda nice, even if she did probably think she'd failed or some crazy shit like that.

The gap between them is maybe five years or so, and Jeyne (the younger) didn’t marry as early as Rebanna did, so her kids are quite a bit younger than Maron. There may have been some infant mortality between them, or even after as well. I’m not sure, I don’t want to pile on. Allyster stopped making appointments because he could tell how not into it she was, and that got weird after ten years.

Anonymous said:

why is alyse ladybright not tagged for your fic? she appears plenty and yet the poor Lady doesn't get a tag.

Ha. I think I only tagged people who already had tags.

Anonymous said:

Is Lewyn's paramour someone we've already met in a AWiS? Jennelyn Sand mayhaps?

No and no.

Anonymous said:

If Casson had married Loreza would that mean that Ellaria would have been Lady Vaith one day?

I suppose so. Unless it prompted Vanella to bite the bullet and get hitched.

Anonymous said:

Speaking of trophy consort, I always thought he'd be younger but not young enough to be her son. More in the vain in your fic verse of Emerik Qorgyle or Trebor Jordayne if he wasn't heir. that way he's very much a man grown when they marry and has plenty of life experience so he has something to offer as a ocassional advisor. But he's still a younger hottie too.

Okay.

Anonymous said:

I like owain a lot. He seems like a real good guy. Plus he's got Tully links too which makes him dynastically well linked along with his Reacher and married Martell links. Alyse is going to be all over that, but I imagine there might be a queue.

Owain is the pragmatic one. Marq is a mini-Corret with all his ISTJ-ness. Lymen is the racist one. Jon the Green is also there. Maybe he’s the funny one.

Yeah, Eliott’s peeps aren’t as cool as Loree’s.

Anonymous said:

I have sympathy for Jeyne Swann lover anon because I'm actually drawn to your background characters more than your POV's. I like all your POV choices and they're a nice spread but its the unknown with the background characters that interests me. I like Deria, Deneza is someone I really wish for more of, Adwin's a professor in another life, Owain is just perfect, Sarra/Aelora are just the cutest, I need more Dylan, Simon Leygood's life intrigues me even if he's only a name, Alyse is a dream.

Alyse has dreams.

Anonymous said:

How do Rebanna and Allyster feel about the fact that Maron is almost 30 and not married? I get that the Dornish don't push marriage as hard as some, but they still do succession through bloodlines. Would the fact that he hasn't married make them question if he's responsible enough to rule Wyl?

Well, he had his heart broken once.

They’re probably in Wyl right now talking about how they’ll totally bring it up as soon as he hits thirty. Also, keep reading.

Anonymous said:

Does Lenelle have ladies-in-waiting, or is that a right reserved for Martells proper? Similarly, does Jenny have ladies, or is her status low enough, and scandal that she caused great enough, that no knight or lord wants his daughters to serve her?

Lenelle does have ladies of her own, I just haven’t really thought about who they might be or had cause to mention them. Emelyn was one, once upon a time.

I have no clue about Jenny. She would probably ditch them if she did have them.

Anonymous said:

This is a bit of a random comment but I loved your response to my asking about where the Fossoways were. It just highlights how different peoples minds work. once I read who the groom was on the Dramatis personae my first thought was who were his cousins on the other side of his family and thought they must be young or female for him not to have any of them as his little group of companions. When I saw none were there I just immediately jumped to conspiracy theories like a normal person...

I mean, we can weave a tale about how Sarra doesn’t get on with her family ever since they found out that she doesn’t like apple pie, or something.

Anonymous said:

Besides GRRM, who would you say the biggest influences on your writing are?

Jane Austen is kind of obvious. Especially in the dialogue, probably.

Actually, Martin doesn’t influence my style nearly as much as I would like him to. My descriptive passage are always very, like, functional.

Anonymous said:

Whether or not it occurs in on page, I'd imagine that, at some point during the events of AWiS, some Reach Bros got drunk and decided to loudly sing The Dornishman's Wife. They couldn't understand why their Dornish hosts didn't find the song amusing.

I think their Dornish hosts just find it dumb. And it will be quite the wedding feast, I’m sure. Literal wine fountains.

Anonymous said:

Will AWiS feature anything like Martin's weirder, trippier passages? Either a character having a fever dream or ingesting a hallucinogen of some sort?

I’m not sure if I’m up for that. I did once write a dream for Eglies, though.

I’m not sure which pov character is most likely to eat a magic mushroom. Probably Ormond.

Anonymous said:

Aside from Loreza being dornish and set to be ruling Princess of Dorne, I can't help but feel like anther problem Eliott may encounter with her is she's very much a grown woman. Whereas there seems to be so many really young brides elsewhere, some criminally young but even 19 year olds like Olenna haven't really lived, they're in a lot of ways children in women's bodies due to the way they get infantilized. Loreza isn't any of that and that is a new experience even before the political stuff.

I think that’s quite insightful. And Loree has this confidence about her sexuality that I don’t think Eliott will know what to do with.

Anonymous said:

Love Deria, she sounds like she has a bed warmer and wants to find someone for her new friend, lol.

Deria’s a classy lady. She doesn’t kiss and tell.

Anonymous said:

I volunteer to kill Tybutthole, it would be my pleasure, I'd even pay you for the honour. As realistic it is, I hope there can be something positive to come out of this even if it only sadly Marigold getting out.

I suppose that all depends on how you define “positive outcome”. As I believe I’ve said before, this society is tailor made for men like Tybutt, but I think Alysanne is starting to realize that that may be problematic, so I would say not all hope is lost.

Anonymous said:

Princess Trystana and Lord Gargalen totally seem like marriage goals for the setting. they've found a way to function as a couple, communicate and raise their kids together with respect and support.

I mean, maybe they seem like that now. You should have seen them in the old days.

Anonymous said:

Daenella seems kind of Targ to me, like she inherit all the privilege like a Martell has but without any of the dutiful nature that goes with it, which seems Targ-ey. By the time she was born her dad was gone/or almost, so her mother had to help Rhodryn in his new role, and child bearing problems and grieve and adapt so Daenella probably just got to have all the fun of being born into such great position but without any of the lessons in duty.

All the best royal families have that “only two kinds” thing and in the Martells’ case it the whole “hot and cold” thing I made up for The Princess and the Septa. It was kind of, like, institutionalizing the contrast between Doran and Oberyn, (a contrast so obvious that even GoT noticed it...) And Daenella is kind of this generation’s Oberyn. Though, so is Arion, so…

But, of course, the sharp contrast is also an oversimplification. Like, which one is Lewyn, for example?

Anonymous said:

Linette!!! nice to hear about her a bit. I wonder if a tiny bit of Duran's appeal to Alysanne, as she gets to know him better, if his obvious pride in his daughters, and the fact he's ''satisfied'' with them.

Tiny bit?

Linette’s a pro. She has charts.

Anonymous said:

Daenella and Trystana seem like they just don't understand each other at all. they try in their own ways to connect but they're so different that the other just doesn't see these overtures as being meant to be kind or loving. Little Trystana might momentarily unite them when she's probably likely to be born at the most inopportune time. They're sisters, they clearly care for one another they just have no clue how to communicate with each other.

Anonymous said:

The princess of the breeze seems to bring the worst out of her sister. I think Trystana just has no idea how to relate to her, and as she's so used to being in control and knowing what she's doing she can't quite function as she wants to around her sister and they just end up having this escalating back and forth, that Trystana seems to know if ridiculous but can't quite break the cycle.

Deanella always has the best intentions for things, but she just gets overwhelmed by her emotions and can’t focus on things enough to actually follow through. She wants to be a good mother and a good sister but… omg, that dog has a fluffy tail! No one sane would trust her with any actual responsibilities.

And Trystana is very dutiful, but she also wants to make sure everyone knows how dutiful she is. Specifically that she’s more dutiful than Daenella. That being said, she would drop everything to help her sister in a crisis, even after the twentieth time.

Anonymous said:

Whilst I'm enjoying the little romance Alysanne has going on, I'm particularly enjoying her simple joy at having people notice her and making a few new friendships and how she just seems to spill to these people because she's probably never had anyone to really talk to for years aside from her daughter, and you can't tell you child any of this sort of stuff. I could see her and Deria becoming great friends, and Trystana too if Alysanne's world continues to open up.

Female friendships are important for women.

Anonymous said:

Someone needs to engineer ''accidents'' for certain assholes so that Daisy and Marigold can be left the fuck alone.

Anonymous said:

LMAO, Alysanne thought she was in for an earful and instead she was being set up with her dreamboat again. Honestly when this is all over however it goes or doesn't go she's going to need a good neck massage from all the whiplash she's getting trying to get her head around all these dornish ways.

Those mysterious Dornish ways of, like, consent and stuff.

Anonymous said:

On a scale of 1-10, how concerned should we be for Alysanne's safety? Tybutt doesn't seem the type to take his wife showing agency lying down.

If Tybutt gets on Trystana’s wrong side you should be more concerned for his safety.

Anonymous said:

Trystana girl, you looked in the mirror lately, Daenerys is wilful? lol. Maybe their wilfulness comes out in different ways but they've both got bucket loads of it. I did enjoy her chat with Alysanne in general though, she likes her husband and wants him to have some happiness and joy. the fact the lady he likes is the biggest sweetheart that ever sweethearted is a big bonus though.

How dare you! Dany is nothing at all like Trystana!

[p1nkwitch]

Originally two parts, but i want to finish the mini saga and go back to the hijinks. One last serious bit left and we are into crack territory again!!

@nonbinaryeye

YOU ARE NOW PETER LUKAS

He starts the scratch.

Using his wind powers he lifts the Quills of Echidna and starts to cut the mechanism in Oliver's land that should send the signal to skaia to start another game. It's not exactly easy and a bunch of giant imps appear to try and stop him. Most of them he can send away with forsaken the others he has to kill manually, which is rather annoying.

Still he is half way through with it when the imps start agonizing out of nowhere.

Looking around he sees something start to come out of their shapes, it looked almost like-

Well if he was being philosophical? It looked as if someone was sucking their souls out of their bodies and putting it in a bunch of small boxes that fall around him.

Their bodies remain still and empty.

Oh no.

“Oh yes” He has seconds to dodge a hit to the head with that fucking 8Ball question cane, before Elias tries to beat him up again.

Peter hides in forsaken thinking that it was strong enough to keep him out of sight of Elias, but just like his own powers got a boost, Elias did as well, because the next thing he feels is searing pain in his head and the lonely being torn apart around him pulling him out.

I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW YOU

Fine. If Jonah wants to start a strife he will accept.

Peter is done with this annoying little man.

They spend quite the long time just trying to hit and hurt each other as much as they could, Elias even attempted to use his heart powers to steal him too like he did with the imps, but Peter merely uses the air to shove him around making it impossible to focus.

In the end its merely tiredness that wins, Jonah slips and Peter who has always been bigger, and now with the other in his original body, was even more so, knocks him down keeps him in the ground while he struggles and tries to fight him off.

He merely pushes him back and grabs the stupid cane from him.

“You know, i just asked for one thing only and that was for you to leave me alone. To finally get out of my life and to never see you again. But no, you can't do that cant you? You have to come around to try and be the biggest pain in my ass to my very last moment!!” Peter doesn't feel much when he punches him in the face, beyond the indignation at him for denying him his last request.

“Go to hell!! If you think I'm letting you get the best of me you childish-” He looks at him.

A bruise is already forming on his cheek from where he hit him. Jonah was still throwing venom at him and he was exhausted, he had to focus on the fight so he left the needle still almost at the end of scratching the whole thing.

Peter's head is foggy and everything seems so pointless and loud.

This man more than anything.

Shining bright in fury and indignation and if he was right, fear too. Jonah was a fire, if you didn't watch it it would get you.

It churns his gut just seeing him.

Clutching the cane he ponders it for a second, but decides to finally do what he should have done a long time ago.

“And-”

“I don't care Jonah, I really don't. You had a shot by leaving me be, but I suppose I ought to do this if I really want to achieve peace” Taking a breath he raises the cane upwards so he can beat his head with it to finally shut him up for good, to finally make it end between them.

Peter doesn't even care if he dies.

Perhaps before he did, he recalls the actual feeling of terror when he asked him to help him die faster because it hurt so much on his quest bed, the bleeding stab wounds were making Elias dizzy and the pain was unbearable. Peter recalls the bout of fear at snapping his neck, but now? Now the fog was making it impossible to matter. To care about finishing this disgusting little man's life.

“Goodbye” He sees the terror reflected in his eyes.

“Peter- wa- wait we can talk-!” He was about to hit him when something knocked him out of the way and he slid across the floor.

Lying in his back he stares at the sky and the black roots that are moving around it, while reality starts to crumble.

“I can't believe I turned into such a bloody mess!! Did you honestly try to kill each other??!”

Ah the fake one.

“What are you doing here!” Jonah is scrambling up. Peter is measuring his chances against the two of them, but knows it would be futile. So he remains there.

Why can't he ever get what he wants? Why won't they leave??? They did before so many times!! They all have walked out from the other, why is this any different.

“Oh god you are a mess for real, aren't you Peter i can't believe this”

“Elias-”

“You can't hear him, but he is!! And he is my husband, get your own-”

He tunes them out and focuses on finishing what he came to do even while lying on the floor.

YOU ARE NOW ELIAS BOUCHARD

“And- Oh Peter fuck off!” Jonahsprite goes to grab Peter’s face while apparently the man starts again to try and finish the job.

Elias tries to not shudder at the memory of the empty expression he made when he tries to kill him. He compares it to when he asked him to help him die faster in his quest bed, because the stab wounds while waiting to bleed out hurt a lot. The stark difference between those two moments and the expressions he got were enough to make him want to hurl.

Peter had not wanted to hurt him then, he did it the fastest way possible and only because he insisted, Elias had to track him down afterwards with JonahSprite and actually reassure him, even if it was a thinly veiled effort, to not let him know he was sort of happy he was so worried about him.

He had thought at the time that he found something else to have an upper hand on him. But now he realizes that it wasn't.

“Let us finish talking first!” His double is trying his best to keep the man in place. But he hasn't realized like him that it was sort of late. Annabelle and his own weapon had been right, he was too far gone now.

“Why should i-” Dropping next to him he feels sore, hurt and tired.

“You are an idiot” Peter merely watches him and after a few seconds says the thing that really nailed the fact that it was all over.

“I really did think I loved you” Reading it was one thing, seeing him say it with such a blank expression was another. Locking his jaw in place and swallowing he tries.

“You do, you still do, you are just being dumb and letting your god get the best of you” He has to believe it.

“I dont think so” He makes a pained sound and looks down at him.

“Im- did you actually throw them away?” It takes him a second to realize he meant the rings.

“I dropped them yes” That's it, he tries to get up and go, but his double keeps him there giving him a furious look.

He is angry and now he is the one that's upset.

“You are a thief of heart and you have beholding, think” What does he even want from him?

“So what? I steal his soul? Keep it as a companion in a doll or something? what else can i do with this??”

“Oh my god, feelings! You deal with feelings too”

“But they are gone if you haven't noticed! There is nothing for me to take or use or-!” He doest understand, he didn't see him, the emptiness as he tried to kill him.

“Forsaken doesn't take them away you know this. It just… makes them dull, makes you think you don't care. He thinks- no, we made him think he had nothing else!” Peter has never needed an anchor, he could walk the perfect line between his god and their relationship.

But here? Here it was so condensed that he sank and he never noticed happen.

So just this once… JonahSprite doesn't have his memories, he remembers up until he was James, but in the amount of time he accompanied Peter the man got him to care too.

Guess they do have a type and it's lonely. He owes Simon money then.

He doesn't want to steal his feelings, but he wants to bring them forth.

But first, he grabs his face and leans down while the man tries to get him off. He rebuffs him.

“I love you, you giant sap, I do. I did not cheat! Neither of us did. So get that out of your thick head, we just had fun talking with a friend. It's been so long, but thats all, we could not ever even go back to that again. Barnabas is good but he is not that good to forgive us for it”

“Not like you, or well not good per se, but you certainly put up with me far more than anyone has before and that is something”

“So please big man just this once…dont fight me on this ok?” He kisses him. Peter goes still under him, and he can feel him start to try and slip away, but he holds him tighter and bites his lip making him go back to being solid.

Elias doesn't push further merely kissing him over and over again in little presses of their lips, one of his hands goes to caress his cheek and he lets their foreheads touch.

He just needs a spark and he can take care of the rest, afraid of opening his eyes and seeing a dull stare he can't help but to let out a small sniff, he will not cry, he refuses. Getting up he watches him and Peter looks at him with the same empty stare. His lips wobble and he shakes his head. Beholding then? He tries to shove memories of their time together, but the man looks more and more angry rather than moved.

“Peter, c'mon you have to-” Jonah is trying, but if it didn't work with him-

“I don't, really can you both please stop touching me? Its making me uncomfortable” He hits him in the chest.

“You bloody sea weaded excuse of a sailor i cant believe how much of a fucking bastard you are, i cant- I… i can't”

“Almost 30 years and you do this to me, you are the worst husband in existence, you leave me for months, make awful puns and nicknames, fight me over the petties things ever-” He doesn't stop he has to let it out, along with the tears that finally are slipping through his eyes, but now they are out of sheer indignations rather than sadness.

“You snore, you keep putting my stuff on high shelves just to make me ask you for help or get a chair to get them-” A sob breaks through.

“make me cake, buy me things you know i would like, let me sleep on top of you when i get home and let me unwind if work was hard-” His hand grips his stupid godtier hoodie.

“-Kill the spiders, because you know i actually hate them even if i pretend they don't bother me-”

A hand wipes his tears from his left cheek and he stiffens. Hoping for a small chance.

“Awfully weepy of you Lias” His voice is cracked and when he looks he has the barest hint of a flush on his otherwise pale skin. And a glint of amusement in his expression.

Oh.

He falls forward while Peter tries to catch him, but Elias merely goes to kiss him. He latches onto him and to make his point across he uses his heart powers. Peter lets out a startle and pained sound, but he doesn't relent, bringing forth all his feelings, but not actually stealing them, just letting them simmer there. He could.

Elias could just as easily steal him away to keep forever in his grasp.

But when two pair of hands grab him back and tug him closer he knows he can't.

He loves him like this.

Eventually they break apart.

“Don't ever do that again” Peter gives him a peck and nuzzles him.

“I can't believe i will say this, and if anyone asks it never happened, but- Please don't ever stop giving me a glance from time to time. It felt like i was going on autopilot, i couldn't even enjoy my own loneliness”

“I won't”

They hear a tiny mew and Jonah is looking at them with what he knows is envy in his own face.

Peter looks up at him and his face goes from entertained to guilty and then a grimace. Lifting a hand towards him the sprite hisses. His husband nods and sits up before grabbin Jonah and putting him on his lap, while he lets out a bunch of noises of protest and actually scratches his arms.

“Im sorry, i didn't mean it, i do think you are real-”

“No, you dont. Its fine, you are right i'm just a copy, now leave me be-” Peter gives him a look and then at Jonah as if asking permission.

He considers it, but...he knows that he can't say no. He nods.

The taller man lifts the chin of the sprite and kisses him, while the other freezes in place. Peter actually deepens the kiss and it was fascinating to see, like seeing a distorted mirror. He would admit it was exhilarating to see himself in that position. So sneakily he goes next to his husband and kisses his neck too making him pull apart to sigh against his doubles lips.

“Insatiable aren't you?”

“Maybe, maybe i just like to see you both”

“Narcissistic then” His husband was a little shit.

“I would say voyeur” But apparently he wasn't even better. Still JonahSprite looked at the two of them with a calculating look, that Peter stops by merely bopping his nose.

“I'm tired, and you are both the same bastard, same eyes after all. What does it matter where they are? You could both steal as many bodies as you want and i would still marry you anyways”

Funnily enough both of them blush at the comment.

“Sap”

“Idiot”

“Yours?” He is definitely exhausted if he was that soft.

“Yes… always” Elias is just as tired, so he is permitted to say it just as softly.

Before he could attempt to sneak into his lap too and start what could possibly be the best make out session in the history of paradox space involving the three of them, Peter gives him an apologetic look.

“ Elias… I already started the scratch, i can't not finish it. The game is busted beyond relief, both of you said it, by now it's impossible to win” He takes a deep breath.

“Can you finish it and make it out to where we are supposed to meet up with the rest?”

“No, we don't have the time” Before he can answer him to curse him for following Annabelle’s plan he sees Jonah press his cheek against their husbands chest and gives him a smug look.

“Finish it”

“Excuse me??” He startles at him.

“You heard me finish it”

“We can't make it in time to the others-”

“Oh i wouldn't be so sure…just trust me, both of you” Well, if anyone would want to survive is him, no matter the situation.

“Fine”

“Are you- of course you both are. Great”

“Ok, let me up then”