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fill-me-with-your-memes-daddy · 3 years

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Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]

So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.

Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad

Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.

STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.

IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.

STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.

Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him

So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.

NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT

The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable

Those husky animation models suck lmao

Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!

God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it

Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that

But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????

Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden

This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh

Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)

THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much

Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)

Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens

On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending

Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other

YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).

Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last

Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!

Oh never mind slavery trollmarket

Bruh titanic camelot

I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things

NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH

STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER

THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN

WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?

Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person

For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues

Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy

Bruh I was grieving

PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference

Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?

NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS

Oh thank God he's okay

NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD

oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))

But I want to see him again

But I'm glad to see vex

Yay they're in arcadia!

But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((

Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)

Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them

Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus

DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE

Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.

BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.

Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.

Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???

And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole

And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!

THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!

BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????

Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭

Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora

HUZZAH

NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????

STAB THAT BITCH JIM

WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED

Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it

SEVEN KIDS?????????

T O B Y ????????????

W A I T NO

N O

IS HE ACTUALLY

OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE

NO THERE ISN'T

F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED

Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS

I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH

W A I T

HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????

HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????

WAIT IS HE

BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON

HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????

BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending

TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all

And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.

#tales of arcadia #rise of the titans #trollhunters #rott #rise of the titans spoilers #rott spoilers #toa #3 below #athena's own original post!#jim lake jr #claire nuñez #toby domzalski

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sgt-paul · 3 years

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FIRST REACTIONS LADDSSSSSSSSS

long tailed: intro feels a bit too long, hmm, actually the whole song?! if it would have stopped after the vocals it would have felt more powerful to me, as the melody ends up being a bit overused in these 5 minutes. but good stuff anyway, i feel like my initial excitement for this song already emerged when i heard it in the trailer

find my way: good vocals oooooh that's a fun bit. love the creativity with the instruments ahhhhhh there it is, the fade out, which was my favourite from the trailers... this part is the highlight of the album so far (yo chill we’re like 7 minutes in) love the bass now this i could listen to forever (unlike long tailed)

pretty boys: step-bro of early days, so not totally my cup of tea okay it gets better this is more like it love his deep vocals!!!

women and wives: OOOohhjhhhhhhh he still has the vocal versatility shit, this is gorgeous the piano bit is also gorgeous. powerful love the drums fave so far???

lavatory lil: hhmmhhm rocky backing vocals remind me of 80s rockabily bands (stray cats?? no idea where that came from) a fun little rock n roll song. "she is acting like a starlet but she is looking like a harlot" yo, sir 💀

deep deep feeling: oh. OH. wWOW. yeah babyyyyy this is what i wanted to hear FUCK THIS IS SO GOOD BRO oh my god (literally had to stop it at 1:45 and take it all in as i was smiling at my computer screen) okay that transition?? unexpected and gorgeous!! the lyrics. “sometimes I wish it would stay, sometimes I wish it would go away, emotion” YEAH beautiful guitar sound ahhhhhhhhhhhh so dreamy. giving me a rushes vibe a this point. long, melancholic and exceptionally beautiful. good vocals all over the song, love the vibe, love the lyrics

slidin: WHOA. HEAAAAVVYYYYY yessssssss (this one has rusty and abe on it right? or??) unexpected vocal style “BUT I KNOW THAT I CAN DIE TRYING” BROOOOOO????!!!!!! would have preferred the vocals to be cleaner but yo this is a jam. love how heavy it is lovely guitar bits ahhhh. he knows his stuff fuckkk

the kiss of venus: soft im also soft his vocals gosh he's so old he's gonna make me tear up "two passing planets in the sweet sweet summer air" .... hoooly thats a good bit this man has an unhealthy obsession with the harpsichord :)

seize the day: fun opening overall fun vibes, playful and uplifting (probably what i would have assumed to the be the single? idk) a pleasant listen

deep down: OKKKKKAAAYYYYY YESS BABYYYY RIGHT UP MY ALLEY BITCH THIS IS SO FUCKING GOOOOOOD literally have the urge to cry. feels like struggle’s chill step-bro FUCK. im so happy deep deep feeling and deep down are so long (i would have loved to hear 1971paul sing this song)

winter bird/when winter comes: surprise bitch i bet you thought you'd seen the last of me OHHHHH, thats the one from 1992 isn't it??? he sounds so young holy shit... this is gonna make me emotional!!!!! tears?????? go back to your place!!!! this is so sweet and beautiful jesus christ okay i am literally crying at this point such perfect end to the album

#AAAAAAAH:)#im so happy i decided to wait for the whole thing #im pretty overwhelmed at the moment and this nonsense is just stuff i wrote down while listening to it for the first time #and so yeah its nothing coherent or meaningful just sort of a documentation of my first reactions #it'll be interesting to compare them later on!!!#anyway my head hurts incredibly as i have slept 3 hours last night #and today's exam was massively stressful #but it went alright #so i passed all 3 exams of this week yay!!!!!!#ill hopefully be able to interact more with the new content in the next few days #but now im gonna try and sleep a few hours #its genuinely a miracle that im still alive lmao #:)#personal

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crimeronan · 4 years

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ik youre not a therapist and i dont want like therapy or anything but im 17 and ive known i was bipolar for 3 years now and i dont know how im supposed to live the rest of my life like this. im so fucking tired. how do you stay alive

you sent this a couple days ago & i’m posting at a weird time so i’m not sure if you’ll see it but.

i’ve been looking at this message trying to decide how to respond

because i don’t know your situation, your symptoms, how you’re feeling, whether you’ve had positive or negative experiences with medication, psychiatrists, therapists, hospitals, all that related shit

the bipolar life advice i give to people is vastly different depending on the individual. it’s not a one size fits all thing. and there’s never even a guarantee that my advice will be the right choice

so since i don’t know about your situation or experiences or what you want, i’m not gonna tell you what to do. i’m gonna focus on the “how do you stay alive” question and try to pen down some personal feelings. and if they help then great, and if they don’t then... this is the most honest i can be

(you can always ask another question to get a better answer. my inbox is a coin slot and i am a vending machine of varied-degrees-of-helpfulness replies offered at varied-inconvenient-too-long-intervals)

how do i stay alive

it’s a 2-parter, actually. i pondered how to condense my thoughts/feelings, and it came down to these two things

1. love 2. spite

1. love

the spite is easier to write about than the love. love is hard to reach when i feel like shit.

spite is where i go when i want to die. love is where i go when i want to want to live.

maybe i don’t want to be alive. but maybe i wish i did. spite doesn’t help me much there. spite keeps me afloat, but it doesn’t make the floating pleasurable. there’s more to life than outlasting everything that ever hurt me. i need a reason to continue when there’s no enemy to fight

so. love

i almost wrote about the spite alone because that’s rawer, realer, more visceral. that’s the shit that CONNECTS when everything feels hopeless. but it would be a lie of omission. spite is only one of the major food groups, you’ll waste away from malnutrition if you eat it for every meal. or at least, i will.

“so you’ve got a bunch of people you love,” you say, “and you stick around for them. cry on them. support each other. like each other. fine.” you’ve heard this story before

nah.

i mean - yes. i have people i love. i live with two partners, i’ve got a third girlfriend, i’ve got a long-distance platonic life partner. i have a support net, i have a family i’ve forged, i have confidence that i’m not alone. i have, in a bare-bones checklist sort of way, fulfilled my physiological human need for connection

but i could live without every single one of them. i’m not dependent upon any of them for my survival. i’m not dependent upon them for love, given or received. (this isn’t a callous cruelty, it won’t hurt them if/when they read this. i’ve told them all this, they know. they’re glad of it.)

so. what the fuck does “love” mean, then?

the short explanation is that it’s my love of life, of things in the world. it’s all the little connections i’ve made. every time i love something, a hook tethers to the universe. hook enough tethers, and i no longer feel the need to float away. no dissolution of self today, sir

the rest of this section is some of the things i love. partially it’s to show how i connect to little things and ascribe magic to the mundane. partially it’s because i like thinking about things i love, i like typing them out, and i like that i could keep going for thousands and thousands of words.

i am laying in bed at 7:30 AM with the lights off and the shades drawn. blue light comes through the slats because it’s the better time of year, the one where i finally get vitamin D, the one where the birds chirp at 4AM, the one where the sky isn’t impenetrably black til 10PM.

there’s a weighted blanket tucked around my legs. my partner rafi bought it for us to share because it’s soothing and heavy and comforting and helps with my physical pain. right now it’s soft on my skin and if i get too emotional as i write, i can pull it over me like a cloak until i’m settled.

the apartment’s walls are blank because we’ve spent eight months intending to put art up and keep forgetting. but there’s a newly-unearthed dining area in the kitchen because i finally shifted around the unpacked boxes that were dominating the space. it’s new and it surprises me every time i walk out there. it’s open and inviting and bright and it’s a sign that we’re making this place home.

we’ll put a cheap IKEA table by the window and we’ll probably never eat family dinners there - why would we sit in hard chairs and make stiff conversation when we could all cuddle on the couch - but my partner dev will create a place to do their art and the surface will be constantly littered with drying watercolor experiments.

we’ll hang our art one of these days, too, when our collective adhd offers a miraculous combo of remembering + having time + having motivation + having inspiration. rafi has the most art because they’ve been collecting it for years. i have to start smaller. i’m not used to keeping physical objects. dev has a few pieces thrifted or bought at local artist events or painted themselves

so we’ll put art up in the living room, my single “you are magic” flower print alongside a naked monster lady that dev fell in love with when we browsed art at a yuletide event months ago, alongside rafi’s monster girls and comic characters and book characters and literature art and quotes and abstract pieces and whatever else they have hiding in boxes.

my head protests that naked monster ladies do not belong in the living room, although the picture isn’t overtly sexual. but then i remember that they do, actually, because it’s our space and we can do whatever we want with it as long as the lease isn’t broken. there isn’t anyone in the local social circles who’d be perturbed by the decor, as far as i know. i don’t have to hide anything from my parents because i live 3600 miles from them, and even though i miss my mom, the distance is good for me

there are two exquisite chairs on the porch. they fold and recline from thrones to nearly-horizontal beds. there are pillows and cupholders and trays and specific spaces for both a book and a phone. i can sit there while the morning sun rises and read or play word games or browse tumblr, cup of coffee beside me, trees shielding my eyes from stabby sunbeams

there are remnants of the last tenant’s garden in one corner of the yard. we’ve done fuckall for yardwork but plants struggle through anyway. some seem to have sprouted by accident. mushroom clusters populate the edges of the fence. the apartment squirrel (there are probably several, but i like to think it’s a single energetic creature) runs back and forth along the fence & i always lose my train of thought & then laugh my ASS off at the “SQUIRREL! XD” adhd moment. birds kick up leaf litter and play on the ground looking for insects to eat, they wiggle their tail feathers and flap their wings and sometimes they disappear and then return with friends

a little more than eleven months ago, i packed all of dev’s and my shit into a uhaul and drove and drove and drove to get to this city i’d never been in before to live with a partner i’d never cohabitated with. we were homeless for more than a month, we weathered some financial disasters, we met some great people and some shitty ones

on the drive i fell in love with the sky. i didn’t know how big it can get - actually, that’s a lie. i’d FORGOTTEN how big it can get. i’ve loved the sky thirty miles out to sea, no land in sight in any direction, just blue water and blue space above. i’ve loved the vastness and the yawning beneath me and the knowledge that everything is BIGGER than i can fathom. the depth of the sea doesn’t frighten me, it’s home. i don’t want to die, but if i had to, the ocean makes a soothing grave

in north dakota i discovered that i’ve been partially blind my whole life, which is a different tale that showed me i’ll never stop learning myself. in montana we struggled up thousands of feet of mountains with the car huffing and puffing at the trailer’s weight, and when we finally coasted downward, it felt like sudden freefall. we ended up in the pitch darkness of night on sheer winding interstates with midnight construction projects forcing detours. the mountains felt hungry, they had teeth. mountain cliffs are much scarier to me than the ocean depths

i bought a red bull and poured a little out the driver’s side door as an offering to hermes, because i’m not particularly religious but i’ll take help where i can get it. slammed that back in a few gulps and shook to bright-eyed alertness and ended up behind a slow-driving red pickup truck that guided us over about a hundred miles of mountain terrain

i thought, that’s just some construction worker driving between sites. the roads are empty at this time of night, but it’s an interstate. of course we’d end up behind someone. this isn’t divine intervention. this isn’t the benevolence of a god

i thought, but it can be a little magic. if i want it to be.

and it was. it stays with me.

god help me but i’ve been writing this stream of consciousness for more than 30 minutes and i’ve said nothing. i haven’t talked about the city, the parks, the people, the conversations, the books, the tv shows, the movies, the communities, the library, the animals, writing, reading, singing, acting, swimming, analyzing, creating, supporting, building. and i can keep going. i can come up with hundreds and hundreds of things i love and i can write paragraphs about all of them

so i’ll stop here. you get the picture. love is the life i’ve made for myself, the surroundings i’ve built, the quiet moments i can capture, the inspiration i pin, the magic i commit to memory.

i had to work so damn hard for every single bit of this.

i’ll be fucking damned if i let it go because my brain tried to trick me into thinking death is better.

2. spite

there are people who want me to die.

i don’t mean that i have a giant entourage of personalized enemies who curse my name and plan my individual demise. although there have been plenty of people who have not liked me much. probably some of them would enjoy my death. i don’t give a shit about that

there are people who want me dead because i am a dot on a grid they dislike. a faceless anonymous enemy who meets too many bad criteria with numbers and percentages and shrinking majorities and shifting public opinion

because i’m gay. because i’m bipolar. because i’m autistic. because i’m a dropout. because i grew up poor. because my spine curves and my shoulders ache. because i squandered my potential, because i didn’t have enough potential, because i didn’t love god enough, because i love the wrong gods, because i don’t worship, because i worship wrong, because i didn’t seek a husband, because i never wanted one, because i talk too much, because i can’t be controlled, because i chose to leave the fold when i realized it was suffocating me, because i’m ugly, because i’m gorgeous, because my body belongs to me

pick your poison.

this bothered me growing up, a lot. i knew i did not deserve to die. but if enough people tell you that you should, a little part of you will wonder if they’re right. that little part might become bigger the closer they get and the louder they shout and the longer they wear you down

we know the rough shape of this story, i don’t need to tell it. mine was messy and not triumphant and i survived more by chance than premeditation.

i’m older now. by and large i’m still young as shit - i’m 24 - but GOD i am LEAGUES away from 15, 16, 17. i know who i am. i know what i want. i know how to get it. and when i don’t know that, i find out. i tell the truth. i ask for what i want. i use my time how i want. i do what i want.

there are days that i can’t access the “love” side of the equation. no finding poetry in birdsong or sugared coffee for me, thank you, i feel like shit and the world is awful and everything is too big and fast and cruel and everything wants me to die and it wants everything i love to die, too. everyone i love. it’s all garbage. the good doesn’t touch me

trauma is difficult to describe. the difficulty is compounded by the fact that my trauma is influenced by my various neurodivergences, bipolar included. i never know if i’m feeling what other people do. i don’t know if i’m voicing unpalatable feelings others are afraid to express - or if i’m just othering myself, admitting i’m not as human as everyone else.

there is something malevolent and monstrous inside me. i don’t touch it all the time. but i don’t pretend it isn’t there. it sits in my chest and molders or radiates or oozes. it presses at my throat. it curdles in my stomach. it hurts what it touches, whether that’s me or someone i love or someone i hate. it sets things aflame with no regard for the precious or the fragile. it tears down walls and razes shelters and begs for apocalyptic rain.

i can give this thing names, clinical descriptors. i know what it is on a diagnostic chart, in a ponderous article, in an academic debate, in a fiction novel, in a war movie, in a memoir. there are a thousand ways to describe this thing. the descriptors aren’t important. what is important is this - i have learned that most people do not walk side-by-side with a tornado-hurricane-hellfire-weaponized-open-nuclear-reactor. this is not a “normal” expression of human emotion, this is not me trying to ascribe power to “bad bipolar feelings.” this thing lives in me and i know why it’s there and it is not designed to be held/silenced/muzzled/controlled by my body.

it does not help to pretend this thing does not exist. it does not help to try to reason it away or ignore it or tell it to stop. it wants what it wants, it does what it does. possibly if i was better at therapy or stubbornness then i wouldn’t resign myself to that

but it is fucking EXHAUSTING to try to fight something that’s part of me. to try to reshape it, rename it, pare it down, make it consumable for the masses. it’s a war i have never won and it’s a war that i will lose if i keep fighting it. i cannot fight with myself. i cannot beat my monster into submission. if we’re gonna battle like that, head to head, me trying to cut it down, me trying to be the hero, it rearing back like a fire-breathing dragon,

then it’s stronger. it’s always stronger.

so i surrender.

but that’s not where i stop.

can’t fight it. can’t kill it. can’t muzzle it. can’t reshape it, can’t disarm it, can’t contain it.

alright.

so what now.

if the surrender was a full giving-up, this is where i’d passively accept that i’m doomed to hurt and destroy everything precious to me. can’t fix it. will lose everything, will never experience or deserve happiness, will make the world worse simply by existing.

that sure does sound like impending-doom rhetoric. hop skip and a jump from some dire-ass conclusions.

so fuck that, i say.

here’s a better question.

if it has to get out, then what happens if i control where it goes?

here’s the thing.

the monster doesn’t care what it kills or destroys or hurts.

“have a conscience, care about things, remember love, stop yourself, don’t do this don’t do this don’t do this.”

losing battle. lost war.

it’s not the monster’s fault. the monster doesn’t have complex motivations or hates or fears. it exists to protect me through scorched earth. a remnant of a chemical imbalance, maladaptive coping mechanism, bipolar crazy, traumatized injury. it doesn’t know that its job is obsolete.

i can’t change the monster.

but my mind is a separate thing. my mind knows what matters, what my priorities are, what i find precious, what i want to protect. my mind remembers all the things the monster doesn’t.

my mind has learned things the monster can’t.

when i fight it head-on, the malevolence is stronger than me. but as i am, walking with it, sitting in my bed writing this while examining the void and the consciousness, describing it, quantifying it,

that’s when i’m stronger.

and with my mind as the stronger force, i can decide where the monster goes. what it touches. what it destroys. what it burns. where the ashes land.

i do not want to be a destructive person. i want to be someone who builds, repairs, changes. i want to make the world better for kids like me. i want to stop pouring more gasoline onto a fire that’s been burning since long before i was born. i want to believe - i do believe - that positive change is better than negative. i do my best to plant good things and enact that positive change instead of becoming a beacon of wrath.

but there are a lot of kids surrounded by people who want them to die, and not all of them have a protective monster.

so it’s good.

when i’m depressed, my mind loses its battles. my cognizance slips. i forget why i care. i forget what i want. i forget how happiness feels, how to find pleasure in quiet moments.

i don’t get depressed as often as i used to since my meds are adjusted correctly now. but it still happens. it will keep happening for the rest of my life.

my mind weakens and curls up and stops fighting, and the monster is always there.

it’s a very powerful thing when it wants to be.

it wants to survive.

the thing is, it knows there are people that want me/us/whatever dead. it’s been fighting them forever. die like they want? my mind says, sure, what does it matter.

the monster says, nah. our work isn’t done. and fuck them, anyway.

so we get up.

so that’s how i stay alive.

i typed this for 90 minutes and after editing i’d spent two hours on this post. i don’t know if anyone will read it all. i don’t know if it’ll mean anything. i don’t know if these thoughts even make sense, much less if i’ve conveyed the feelings i have.

i love being alive. and when i don’t, i love being a monster. it’s good. all of it is good. i’ve reconciled my uglier pieces. it’s not one or the other, love or spite. it’s symbiosis. i need both, i love both.

no guarantees that this is helpful, but based purely on my own life experience, these are my tips for survival:

you’ll have to find your own roots. i can’t give them to you.

but it’s possible to dig them in and spread them far enough that one uprooted peg doesn’t shift your whole equilibrium.

and when you’re tired, rest, and let yourself be tired, and find the reason why you’re staying in the world.

i’m positive there’s at least one.

figure out why you’re losing your battles and then change the game.

if you can’t win one setup, don’t try to beat the system. adjust your strategy.

you’ll be surprised by what you can love when you stop fighting the disparate pieces of you, and instead figure out how to use them.

#i have several other questions to answer in my inbox if you've asked me st over the past few weeks #im not ignoring it im figuring out how to phrase my reply #replies #bipolar blogging #actuallybipolar #my writing #life advice #long post #REALLY long post #it's under a read more but if mobile deletes it i apologize #c ptsd tag #suicide m #ok to reblog #Anonymous

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thewaitinggamesblog · 3 years

Text

After we collided was worse than After don’t @me

I have thoughts on this movie and Id like to share. Read if you want or don’t. This is a rant, so if you don’t want to hear any negative thoughts on this movie, this is your warning!

You may or may not agree what I have to say, and thats okay. Im just sharing personal thoughts

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After We Collided, in my opinion, was a fucking dumpster fire, I honestly wonder how and why this franchise can still produce movies. I know I'm going to get some heat from this, but in all seriousness, I have no hope for the other films. I think I lost all hope for the franchise after watching this movie.

I read After in conjunction with the first movie. I was interested in how a fanfiction on Wattpad turned into a best selling book and eventually became a major motion picture. That's what sparked my interest in the franchise. Because I in my "teenage youth" read fanfiction and had heard of this particular fanfiction a few times, I wanted to finally see what it was all about. Not surprisingly, it was exactly what I thought it was, a fanfiction.

I did not like the books personally. There were many problems in content/ subject matter and execution of that content that I felt was poorly handled and sent out the wrong message to people at times, but that's for another post.

So going into After we collided, I didn't know what to expect, id watched After, id read the book, and seen promo and trailers and interviews; I knew that the rating had changed. After was rated pg-13 and After we collided is rated R. I knew, along with that, that there were talks about bringing in more book character elements like making movie Hardin more like book Hardin. I was skeptical about that because:

1. That specific change seemed really hard to pull off, especially when you've already introduced the character with different behaviors. I think the transition would have been better if they were more developmental and progressed over time instead of just happening.

and

2. I didn't like book Hardin, I much rather preferred 1st movie Hardin, and his character in the books is a lot, and I was skeptical of the actor to be able to step into that role; after having watched the first movie, which was a watered-down, version of Hardin

In my opinion, it wasn't his acting ability that was lacking in character presence. It was the way his character was written in the script. Book to movie adaptations are really hard, but they're even harder when you have to go back and undo and exchange parts/ feelings/ emotions of a character. The actor who played Hardin (who I'm not naming on purpose) seemed like he was not vibing with this version of his character whatsoever, making the movie so hard to watch. This extends to Tessa as well. Her character development changed, ill say, drastically, and I would have liked to see a smoother transition to that character that we started the movie off with. As an audience member, I was so disconnected from her character and anything that she did because I just didn't believe her character would do that. Being late and cussing in the lobby of her new job, and acting frantic, especially coming off of the first movie where her character acted completely different. I would have never expected her character to do any of that. What's worse about it is that it just happens. There is no explanation as to why it happens and why she does these things, or why she's become more aggressive, she just is, and that bothered me.

Another thing that bothered me to no end was this movie's lack of plot. The book series is very episodic and goes around in circles. I can accept that about the series because knowing the series's backstory that made sense to me. However, a movie should never be like that. There was no overall arching storyline. It was just a bunch of scenes from the book put together to get to the end, which is the "big" but not so big reveal. I felt like there was really no purpose to drive the movie; the goal was just to get from start to finish. This was really sad as a viewer

because there were moments where I felt like the writers could have capitalized on the storyline and made some more diverse and complex scenes that could have given the movie some color. The scenes really do go from one to the other with little to no connection, and they make absolutely no sense.

I think the worst thing for me in the movie is when Tessa goes home. Noah accidentally tells her that her Dad is looking for her. Tessa has this very curt conversation with her mother, and then it's never really talked about after that. Tessa's Dad becomes a vital part of Tessa's story. And I ask, why was that not capitalized on more in this movie? They kind of waited to put back in at the end of the film, which I felt was such a mistake. Like, I know they're saving it for the next movie. Still, I saw no reason not to capitalize on it while they were already setting up for the storyline in this movie.

The writers were trying to capitalize on it being sexier and more like the book that they forget to add a plot. There was so much material to work with. The writers could have easily written and rewritten the scenes to fit the movie's storyline. In return, I felt like that would help push the story along instead of it feeling like this needless pack of scenes.

In addition to that, as the audience, we are missing crucial information that would have helped make sense of the movie. Like we're missing the aftermath of the bet. Like they just scathe over that. The info on Tessa's father, which I see what they were trying to do, but I felt like no one really took the bait.

From a viewer's pov, assuming id never read the books, you start to wonder how this even came to be starting with the first shot.

1.Why is Hardin just asleep in his car?

2. How long has it been since the reveal of the bet?

3. Why and how is Vance able to whisk Tessa away to Seattle to a business deal that we only hear about after she's there?

That last one might be reaching, but still.....

And that's only within the first 15 minutes of the movie.

I also had pacing issues; this was a lot to unpack in such a short amount of time. Yeah, so......

Something I did like!

1. The exchanges between Trevor and Tessa seemed genuine. I liked the chemistry and how they're written together.

And that's pretty much it.

Despite my dislike of the movie, I can appreciate it for what it is a cringe romance fanfiction movie.

I will say overall, some stories should just not be made into movies. In my opinion, I believe the book lost a lot of value when you start adding real-life elements to it. Of course, everyone will have a preconceived idea of what the movie is going to look like. Still, I think expectations fall short when you can't execute the idea properly, which is what I believe happened with After we collided.

So that's my opinion. Just thoughts, like I said you can disagree with me and thats okay, but this this is just my opinion.

signed,

someone with thoughts

#after #after we collided [2020]#movie review #books #after series #hardin scott #tessa young #movie reaction #movienight #after we fell #before #after ever happy #fanfiction #wattpad

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yzngserpent · 5 years

Text

Sweet Pea x (Male!) Reader

Prompt: a little while ago I wrote a two part series called behind closed doors that was inspired by a post I read. I got asked if I was going to do a part 3 so here it is! If you want to read the other parts first (I recommend you do) they’re a little way down my page.

A/N: ok so this turned out to be way longer than I expected. hope you like it! @serpentscvm im definitely doing a part 4.

Warnings: violence, profanity, lite smut.

Sunny Side trailer park was lit from top to toe and full of teenage serpents who had all gathered together for a saturday night party. You were sitting contently on one of the many lawn chairs with a beer in your hand and Toni chatting away next to you. Sweet Pea and Fangs were standing together surrounded by a few other serpents, all talking and shouting loudly. (gif 1) It had been a few days since Sweet Pea took you on your first date, and you two had made it official.

You hadn’t told anyone yet, you thought to yourself how you liked your privacy and that people would find out when the time was right. But you didn’t know that in a few seconds, that would be the said time. just as you were about to reply to one of Toni’s questions, Sweet Pea’s familiar shout of anger interrupted your conversation and your head snapped around to see what was going on. Pea had swung at another teenage serpent, and now the two of them were on the ground in a fist fight. You immediately stood up and ran over, adrenaline pumping through your body.

“Sweets, stop!” you shouted, a few people turning to look at you in bafflement as his nick name slipped from your lips. Fangs retracted from trying to pull his friend away, his actions clearly useless against yours but Pea didn’t listen to you. instead he straddled the boy’s chest and began to lay hard and nasty punches to his face. The look in Pea’s eyes was ferocious and it even scared you a little bit to the point where your body went into shock. but your senses soon kicked back in and you grabbed Sweet Pea’s forearm, holding onto him as hard as you could as he tried to lay his next punch. “Sweets stop, he’s out, you’re going to kill him!”

Sweet Pea sucked in a breath then turned his head to face you, his teeth bared and his cheek bleeding. you tugged on his forearm for him to get up, and as he did so FP Jones strutted over with a look of annoyance on his face. “Sweet Pea, get out of here now and go cool off!” FP shouted, pointing towards the other side of the trailer park. you tugged on his arm once again and led him towards his trailer, your heart still racing in your chest. “sweets, what the hell was that about!” you inquired once the two of you had reached a safe distance away from crowd of people.

The ferocious look in his eyes had faded now, but you could tell he was still angry by the lack of affection he was giving you. “Fucking Fangs asked me about you, then before I could even reply that idiot asked if me and you were together” Sweet Pea ran a hand through his hair frustratedly as he continued to speak, “I said yes, then after that he started calling us names... I couldn’t handle it, I didn’t care about me,” Sweet Pea looked up at you, this time his eyes sad, (gif 2) “but it was when he said your name that I lost it”

You stood there with your mouth open and your eyes wide. one: Pea had told Fangs about you and him, two: now probably everyone knew, and three: you were trying to be annoyed at Pea for telling your personal business but somehow you couldn’t. It made you swoon how protective he was of you, and Fangs was his best friend after all. “(Y/N) say something” Sweet Pea pleaded as he took a step closer to you. You had been standing there for almost a minute in silence with your mouth open in shock, but you quickly snapped it shut then looked at your boyfriend with loving eyes.

“You can’t let people like that make you angry, I know it’s easier said than done but... sweets you could have killed him” you argued slightly, hating seeing him hurt. his right under eye was already beginning to bruise and his knuckles were now sliced open with blood slowly seeping down his fingers. “so? I’m a serpent (Y/N) I would have killed him, I wanted to” Pea replied with a growl, his eyebrows furrowing together in a frown. you couldn’t believe the words that had just come out of his mouth, you were a serpent to but you would never kill someone intentionally. “Sweet Pea don’t even say that!” he flinched at his full name coming out of your mouth, you hadn’t called him that since that steamy night in the truck.

“why the hell not? It’s true!” he yelled back, his hot head getting the best of him. he was now trying to tower you, but being the same height as him was not working in his favour at the moment. “because you can’t go around saying that, you’re a serpent and if the wrong person heard you...” “oh please! do you really think a fucking northsider could take me down? don’t be stupid.” Sweet Pea scoffed, his eyes staring daggers at you. you were from the northside, and his attitude right now was to much. you folded your arms across your chest and glared at him. “you seem to forget that I am from the northside, so yeah a ‘fucking northsider’ has already taken you down, think about that later on when you’re alone.” you snapped, turning around on your heel and walking off towards your house. “fine, I will! run off back to the northside!” Pea yelled after you, causing you to turn around and pull the middle finger as you continued on to the bridge.

It was true, you were a northsider. until your dad decided to run off leaving you and your mum to fend for yourselves. you and your mum stayed with Archie and Fred for a few weeks but it got to much, and you ended up becoming close with Jughead again. that was when you and your mum had to make the move to the southside as it was all she could afford. but it had felt more like home than the northside ever did and you’d loved it until now. you and Sweet Pea were so fresh into the relationship that it made you sad you two had had your first argument over something so stupid. you missed your stuttering boy in your bedroom at 3 am. but right now his temper was getting the best of him and you didn’t want to be around that. your heart began to ache in your chest as you already began to miss him.

• • •

your phone vibrated loudly under your pillow, waking you up from your half asleep state. you rubbed your eyes with a yawn, then as all the events of that night came rushing back into your mind you felt that annoying tingle of sadness in your chest. you looked towards your window expecting it to be morning but it was still pitch black outside. your phone vibrated again, and as you looked at the new text message that lit up your screen your heart sped up a little.

please talk 2 me

the last message of ten read. Sweet Pea had texted you many times before that, all asking where you were and if you were okay. you unlocked your phone and began typing back.

what do you want?

you pressed send and dropped the phone onto your bed. all you wanted was him right now but you were still upset at the way he had spoken to you. ‘ding’

you... where are u?

you smiled down at your phone screen.

I’m at home

I’m comin

at his last text message you shot up out of bed and tried to freshen yourself up. you sprayed on some cologne, pulled on your jeans and a shirt and tried your best to tidy your crazy bed hair. ‘ding’

open ur window

you hurried over to your window and slid it open as quietly as you could. Sweet Pea began to climb, and once he was in your room he stood still and stared at you with puppy eyes, making your heart ache for him. “don’t look at me like that” you whispered, frustrated he was making you cave. Sweet Pea whined and walked over to your bed, sitting down with a loud thump. “I’m sorry... I can’t... control my emotions sometimes and you...” Sweet Pea rubbed at his face, his knuckles now taped up and the first thought that popped into your head was Toni. “you make me feel all these... feelings and I feel...” Pea looked up at you. “I feel like I’m going insane”

his face was sad but his eyes were full of passion, causing arousal and excitement to swirl around in your body. but you wanted to keep your cool for now. “insane?” you inquired, leaning your bottom against the dresser. “yes, like nuthouse insane... I’ve never felt like this b-before, fuck!” Sweet Pea stood up half in embarrassment, half in frustration. he went to knock his fist into your wall but before he could you reached forward and grabbed his forearm, whisper shouting at him to be quiet. “calm down, it’s okay” Sweet Pea looked at you sideways with his jaw clenched. you couldn’t keep your cool anymore, you wanted to hold him again, comfort him from all his worries.

you tugged him against you and wrapped your arms around his neck, burying your face into the crook of his neck. “sweets it’s okay, I understand what you mean with your emotions, and I feel the same to” he gratefully wrapped his arms tightly around your waist, pulling you even closer to him. “you can’t handle your emotions either?” you couldn’t help but chuckle against him. “I was more meaning the ‘going insane’ part, I really, really like you” you half whispered, nervous at what he would say next. “you sure?” he asked, pulling back to look you in the eye. you nodded, a smirk beginning to form on your lips. “want me to show you?” you said as seductively as you could.

Sweet Pea’s pupils dilated bigger and he nodded his head, catching his bottom lip between his teeth. you ran your hands slowly down his neck, then pushed his serpent jacket off his shoulders, revealing his faded plaid shirt. your fingers went to work on the buttons and as you undid the last button, he ripped his shirt off himself and hooked his fingers around the loops of your jeans, pulling you against him. you gasped in delight as his torso was fully on show, and boy did he look good. his dog tags clanged against his chest as he pulled your own shirt over your head, causing your hair to stick up in all different directions. he then leaned down to kiss you, but you turned your head in denial.

“It’s my turn to show you, remember?” you whispered, your lips moving to his neck. Pea nodded then tilted his head to the side and you left slow, open mouthed kisses all the way up his neck until you reached his serpent tattoo, your tongue outlining the faded green snake on his neck. Sweet Pea moaned loudly, his hands squeezing your hips. you pulled away slightly, locked your eyes with his in a lustful stare off, then slowly got down on your knees, causing his eyes to widen in excitement. “remember to be quiet” you whispered, your hands moving to unpop the button on his tented jeans. Sweet Pea bit his bottom lip, watching you with every sense in his body.

his jeans and boxers hit the floor quietly and you wasted no time in taking him in your mouth. you lapped your tongue up his shaft then swirled it around his tip, causing him to throw his head back in pleasure. you sucking him off like this turned him on so much, that he thought he might cum to quickly. his cock throbbed in arousal and his hands moved into your hair as he refrained from pushing himself deeper into your mouth. Sweet Pea looked at you, his eyes glazed over in lust. as sexy as you looked down there pleasing him, all he wanted was to feel you against him again. his heart ached and his hands throbbed to touch you. “(Y/N)” he whispered breathlessly, causing you to look up at him. he grabbed you by your shoulders and pulled you onto your feet, his lips colliding with yours in a heated kiss.

his tongue pushed its way into your mouth and you groaned against his lips, your own cock throbbing with need against your tight jeans. “let me show you now” he whispered, his usual brown eyes almost black in color. a hint of excitement shot through your chest as you decided you weren’t going to make it easy for him. he may be cute, he may have confessed his feelings for you all over again and made you swoon, but the way he talked to you earlier was unacceptable and he needed to be taught a lesson. you pulled away slowly and began to fake yawn. “hmm, but I’m just a stupid northsider” you hummed, smirking at him. Sweet Pea clenched his jaw together and for a moment you thought he was going to spiral into another anger fit, but instead he smirked to, his eyes reading sex.

“you were once,” he began, then his eyes moved to your serpent jacket hanging on the back of your closed door. “but now?” he placed his hand on the side of your face, his dark eyes reconnecting with yours. “now you’re my southside boy” your insides melted and you bit your bottom lip, completely enveloped with the tall boy in front of you. Sweet Pea ran his thumb along your cheek, his smirk making you weak in the knees. ‘fuck this’ you thought to yourself in your head before you pressed your lips against his firmly, not caring about the way he spoke to you before, all you wanted now was to feel every inch of him and that’s what you would get.

#sweet pea smut #sweet pea imagine #sweet pea one shot #sweet pea #riverdale #riverdale imagines #x reader #sweet pea x reader #male x male #southside serpents #fp jones #jughead jones #betty cooper #archie andrews #toni topaz #imagines #fangs fogarty #lgbtq

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scarletcarerra-blog · 5 years

Text

Cars fanfiction/ What happend after cars 3

Uhhh....I got bored Oof, Plus I love cars so......Why the hell not make another fanfiction?

WARNING.....CONTAINS LANGUAGE AND SEXUAL WORDS...... ETC ACTION

Everyone was gathered up at flo´s sipping on oil. Cruz was glaring and lightning in a flirty way while lightning and sally were talking. Then Doc drove up to lightning and sally.

Doc: Hey kid, Wanna go drive more laps?

Lightning: Shouldn´t you ask cruz that?

Doc: So are you retired?

Lightning: Um, Never.

Sally: Yeah. Until you reach the age 40 you´re going to be whining to me sayin ¨Sally my axle hurts!¨

Everyone starting laughing their hoods off except lightning.

Lightning: I am not.

Sally: Yes you will.

Doc: Mhm.

Cruz: Sure Mr. Mcqueen.

Lightning: Okay, Cruz nobody even fucking asked you.

Doc: Oh go suck it lightning.

Lightning: Wow doc, I had no Idea you could speak that language.

Doc: Oh yeah, Well your old man here is a horny little bitch too.

Sally: Oh boy.

Lightning: Whats wrong my Queen?

Sally: Nothing stickers, Absolutely nothing.

1 Week later.....

Lightning, Sally and the others were on their way to Paris for the next race.

Lightning: Hey sal?

Sally: Yeah stickers?

Lightning: Did I tell you that I put a speaker in docs trailer?

Sally: Why the hell would you do that....

Lightning: So I can hear Doc and sophia jacking off

Sally slapped lightning hard on his fender

Lightning: Sal, whats the matter baby?

Sally: The last time ive seen you be this horny was when I first met you.... *She grinned*

Lightning turned the switch to hear what doc and Sophia were doing in their trailer.

Sally: Wow lightning. Wow.

Lightning started laughing his rear off.

2 Days later.

Sally decided to sleep in lightnings trailer instead of the apartment

Lightning: Sal, are you sure?

Sally: Yes stickers im sure.

Sally did not sleep a minute that night.....

Lightnings alarm went off. It was currently 6am

Lightning: Ugh, I hate mornings *He said groggily*

Lightning went over to his trailer to check on sally but all he saw was her talking to someone on the phone.

Doc and lightning went over to the track to do some laps with cruz.

Cruz: So Mr. Mcqueen.....How is it going between you and Ms. Carerra?

Lightning: Oh....Its fine

Cruz: I see why you like her so much

Doc: Okay you two, Stop getting distracted and actually race here

Lightning: Oh shut the hell up

Cruz: Also Mr. Mcqueen?

Lightning: Yeah cruz?

Cruz: I think you should have had let Sally sleep in the Apartment instead of your trailer...

Lightning: I tried to but she declined.

Doc: I have to be honest here, She hasnt been getting any sleep here lately.

Cruz: Yeah, Last week, I tried to talk to her....She almost called me a faggot

Lightning: Really? Because she hasn´t acted like that around me...

Doc: Well kids, Time to go get some food.

Cruz: Can we go to the Pizza place?

Lightning: Uh, Sure. But first I wanna talk to sally.

Cruz and doc agreed while lightning drove over to his trailer.

Lightning went into his trailer watching sally on the phone. Then she hung up.

Lightning: Hey sal, We were going to get pizza....Wanna come?

Sally: Uh, Sure.

They all went over to the restaurant.

Everyone gulped their pizza down but sally.

Lightning: Whats wrong my queen?

Sally: Nothing.

Jackson: Well she does have a attitude, maybe thats her problem.

Sally: Shut the fuck up!

Lightning: Whoah...

Cruz: Mrs. Carerra chill!

Lightning: Sal, If you don´t want pizza we can always go somewhere else?

Sally: I don´t care about the damn food! *She said furiously*

Lightning: Sally Baby chill!

Sally: No, you chill and leave me alone! *She snapped back*

Flo: Honey, Calm down, Its ight.

Sally revved her engine furiously making a scene

Jackson: I was just sayin!

Lightning: You´re fine jackson.

Cruz: Mr. Mcqueen, Maybe we should just leave or send her home so she can-

Sally: FINE! ILL LEAVE! MAYBE YOU´ll BE BETTER WITHOUT ME!

Sally stormed out of the restaurant Creating a scene

Lightning Paid the bill and drove after her.

Lightning: Sally, Wait!

Sally stormed into the trailer and shut the trailer door behind him.

Lightning opened the trailer door and drove in Angrily.

Lightning: What the hell is wrong with you! Did you really have to storm out like that?!

Sally: Yes, I did!

Lightning: Sally just....What the hell is your problem!

Sally: I DON´T HAVE A PROBLEM!

Lightning Revved his engine furiously at her. Sally started to whine but lightning couldn´t hear her over his engine.

Lightning: Im trying to help you, But you won´t let me!

Sally: Because I don´t need help!

Sally tried to exit the trailer but lightning blocked her ways. Then she started to push him out of the way but then he grabbed ahold of her axle and jerked her back.

Lightning: You´re not going anywhere until we figure this out!

Lightning was still holding onto her sore Axle putting a lot of pressure on it making it want to break.

Sally: Stickers...Please....Let go of my axle.....

Lightning: Not until you tell me what your problem is!

Doc: LIGHTNING!

Lightning let her go.

Doc: WHAT IN THE NAME OF HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU! * He bellowed*

Lightning grabbed her axle once again and pushed her against the wall. Just then Jackson stormed into the trailer to grab lightning and threw him out.

Jackson: SINCE WHEN DID YOU BECOME A WOMEN BEATER!?

Lightning: I WASN´T BEATING HER YOU JACKASS!

Doc: HEY! Hey! Break it up you two!

Jackson: Oh yeah! Well atleast I wasn´t left unsupervised!

Lightning started to have flashbacks of when he was little.. Sally saw lightnings reaction when jackson said that to him.

Doc looked confused

Lightning: I wasn´t left Unsupervised!

Jackson: Uh yeah! If you haven´t forgotten! You were abbandoned by your parents because they didn´t love you!

Lightning changed the subject again....

Lightning: And since when did this have to do with sally?

Jackson: It never did Mcqueen. Not until now. Surely you were bullied when you were younger, Because others figured out you had ANGER ISSUES!

Lightning had tears form in his windshield.

Lightning: Says you!

Doc: HEY! *Doc grabbed jackson but jack hit doc and knocked him out*

Sally started to sob

Everyone was staring at lightning seeing his reaction

Jackson: You lived in a adoption center because you were never loved!

Lightning.....Never loved......Never loved....

Lightning drove away into a dark alley having for flashbacks

Sally: Lightning was never loved?

Then everyone paid attention to sally

Sally: No wonder why he acts like he does! because of you JACKSON!

Jackson: Hey....Heh....Lets not get on the wrong page here sweetheart...

Sally: I HAVENT SLEPT IN WEEKS AND NOW IM JUST NOW FIGURING OUT THAT LIGHTNING HAS PROBLEMS THAT I NEVER KNEW ABOUT!!!! * She bellowed*

Flo: Honey, Calm down.

Sally: THIS IS YOUR FAULT!

Sally Hit jackson so hard he had a dent But it did not knock him out. Just then sally stormed out to find lightning. Then she found him in a dark alley.

Sally: Stickers?

Lightning: Sal, I don't wanna talk about it. If you don't want to be my girlfriend, then don't because I understand.

Sally: No stickers, I want to be. Please don't be mad at me?

Lightning: Lets just go get some sleep and forget this happend?

Sally: Sure. *She grinned trying to lighten up his mood.

Lightning woke up in a horrible mood feeling aches in his body.

Sally woke up feeling miserable.

Lightning Went over to his trailer watching sally as she made her way out of the trailer.

Lightning hasn't seen sally look so miserable in his life, He felt bad for her.

Sally had oilshot (Bloodshot) Eyes and she was very droopy with her eyelids halfway closed.

Lightning drove over to her

Lightning: Are you okay My Queen?

Sally: Oh stickers Ive never felt so horrible in my life *She started to have a emotional meltdown*

Sally drove over crying into his door

Lightning: Shh... Get it all out.

Meanwhile.....

Doc and Sophia were having trailer sex.

Sophia: Oh doc, Ive never felt so good in my life!

Doc: Mhm.....

4 Hours later...

Everyone was sitting at Taco Bell

Lightning was gulping down his food as usual, Cruz eating normally along with the others, Jackson fondling with his dick, And sally was staring at her food.

Flo: Sally, Honey?

Sally: Mmmmm

Lightning Glared at Sally

Lightning: Uh sal...Are you going to-

Sally closed her eyes and drifted off.

Mater Used his Airhorn and got everyones attention And sallys eyes opened so quickly it was like a flash of lightning.

Then the song *Meet me halfway by the Black Eyed Peas started playing*

Sally started drifting off again and lightning moved next no her holding her up.

Lightning: Guys, We need to help her

Cruz: Ugh. Well no Shit Sherlock

Jackson Chuckled

Lightning held her tire driving out of the restaurant with the others until she dropped to her rims.

Lightning: Sal!

Doc: Hey, C''mon kid, wake up.

Sally: Doc......Mmmm....It hurts.....

Doc and lightning: Whats hurts!

Doc Felt her stomach as if it were to be twisting.

Doc: When is the last time anyone has seen her eat?

Cruz: Last time ive seen her eat something was like 4 days ago....

Flo: Yeah.

Lightning got worried

Lightning: Sal, Why havent you been eating?

Sally: I have tank poisoning and Insomnia Okay?

Doc: Now you tell us?

Sally started to cry like she were to be having another meltdown.

Lightning pulled up beside her Nuzzling her fender.

Sally: Its not what hurts though....

Doc looked in confusion.

Then doc twisted all of her axles besides her front left

Sally Shreiked in pain as doc twisted it.

Doc: Sorry!

Sally: Just....stop....*She said Sobbing*

Doc: Seems you have a broken axle. Probably from where Mcqueen grabbed you yesterday. *Doc glared at lightning furiously*

Lightning: Im sorry Pinstripe.

A few hours later.....

Sally: Stickers...I love you

Lightning: Sal, If you don't mind, Maybe I can sleep with you for tonight?

Sally: Sure * They both grinned*

Lightning: G'night My queen.

Sally: G'night my king.

1:02 in the morning

Sally started screaming No....No...No!!!

Lightning: Sally!

Sally: Huh?

Sally was breathing rapidly

Lightning: You started screaming no....

Sally had tears form in her eyes and lightning saw it

Lightning: Sally, You don't have Insomnia, You're still having this dream of my wreck....Aren't you?

Sally shook her hood Nodding.

Lightning: Well its okay, Because Im right here. Okay?

Sally Nuzzled him.

Lightning got in front of her checking her Axle

Lightning: Alright. You should be good for now, Just get some rest...Okay?

Sally: Alright stickers.

12:30AM

Everyone was in a good mood except for lightning. He was in the horniest mood ever and so was doc. Storm was in a playful mood, But not as much and lightning and doc.

Cruz, Storm, Lightning, Sally, Doc, And Sophia were in the livingroom playing truth or dare *Dirty version*

Doc: Okay, Mcqueen Ill start with you. Truth or dare?

Lightning: Mmmm. Dare.

Sally: Ooh.

Doc: Okay. I dare you too.....Have a make-out session with sally right now in front of us.

Sally: Oh for the love of Chrysler.

Lightning drove in front of sally making eye- contact.

Sally: Okay stickers, First Of all I-

Lightning was locked in a deep kiss with sally then it turned into a Make-out session.

Cruz: Wow Mr. Mcqueen

Lightning: Impressed?

Cruz: Actually Im jealous.

Everyone started Laughing

Lightning: Okay doc. Now your turn, Hehe.

Doc: Oh you devilish little Bastard. I choose dare.

Lightning: Mmm. I dare you too...Uh...Call Jackson a Slut.

Jackson: WHAT?

Lightning was laughing so hard he was crying

Doc: Jackson you are a slut. There!

Doc: Okay cruz, Your turn but this time we can't choose. Only the person who is telling you can.

Lightning: Oh boy.

Cruz: Okay, Mr. Mcqueen. Im giving you a dare

Lightning: Why me?

Sally Started to chuckle along with the others.

Cruz: I dare you to Uh.....Kiss Ms. Carerras Tattoo.

Lightning: Oh thats easy.

Lightning went behind her and Kissed her Tattoo several times.

Jackson: Okay. My turn. Now I choose sally.

Sally: Oh wow. What a suprise.

Jackson: Sally I dare you to have sex with lightning

Sallys windshield Flashed over and so did lightnings

Sally: Uhm....

Cruz: I have an idea. Why don't we all just have sex right here right now.

Lightning: Im cool with it. Sally?

Sally: Oh why the hell not.

Lightning mounted sally. And the other did the same.

Doc and sophia were doing the same pose as Jackson and Mcqueen.

Lightning: OOOH......

Sally: Oh god lightning! Harder!

Meanwhile.....

Cal and bobby drove in.

Cal: Hey mcqueen I wondering if-

Bobby and cal were in complet shock watching 3 males Jack off with their Girls.... Chapter 2-

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morriggan · 5 years

Text

kh3 comes out in a week (!!!!!) and i have some kh hottakes and kh3 predictions/wishes bc im emotional and ive been playing this series since i was 5 years old lmfao but feel free to chat w me about them!!!!!!!

i love xion just as much as the next person but why would they waste the BEST character theme and battle music on this tiny tiny character that showed up for 5 seconds compared to the series in total lol.

if they dont confirm that riku and sora love each other as more than friends (even if they dont end up like, together) then im lowkey callin queerbaiting. is that a stretch? idk

i really want for the end of kh3 that some characters dont go home, and at least three of them stay back (rebuild the land of departures?) and become fulltime masters and take on kids to train

i want sora to GO HOME AND STAY HOME (for a while at least) at the end

i want kh3 to be the last real game (they can make spinoffs all they want idc but they should End It for good here)

i know this is the end of the xehanort saga but according to nomura, he said kh3 isnt the last of soras story but like..... why not. it should be tbh

kh would be more accessible if they just modeled it more after ff i think. it doesnt need to be dark or mature or anything but if they handled the crossover thing better i think a lot more people would be down for this series (even w the complicated plot)

speaking of, they have to clear up a million plot holes in kh3. was sora the only chosen one and then the keyblade just required more people later on? never explained. how can roxas be “saved” when sora is alive? makes no sense, based on everything dictated in kh2 and days

mickey should not be one of the 7. his role shouldve stayed super limited and mysterious like it was in kh1. his inclusion as a major character in kh2 and onward is..... awful lol.

they shouldve introduced a new original character as one of the 7 and tied in khux at the same time (we know time travel is do-able bc idk young nort was able to do that)

i fully know this would make the plot more wild but if we tie in an original character from daybreak town, it would come full circle and make khux like, idk, worth it

i want the FORETELLERS TO COME BACK AND BE IMPORTANT TO KH3

also i need an explanation for why larxene and marluxia cant wield keyblades when they are nobodies of keyblade wielders..... like thats why roxas was unique right so... why squeenix

overall i think khux was a huge mistake but its so fun to play that i almost dont care anymore lmfao

aqua better be saved or im throwing the whole game in the trash lol

AQUA KAIRI BONDING MOMENTS TOO OH MY GOD

i want many more cutscenes explaining all the drama happening between ansem the wise and xehanort and the other apprentices. what was the lead up to xehanort going from seeing AtW as a father figure to then betraying him and stealing his research and identity? like throw me a bone here that shits interesting!!!!

pls no more drive form grinding for upgrades just to reach treasures and collectables (see: kh2.5 and the stickers, and the cavern of remembrance)

let me be clear, i love hidden dungeons that are challenging. just let me rely on leveling my base stats over relying on my drive form upgrades and abilities to finish these dungeons

mad that everyone got cool new outfits (except kairi sweet girl im so sorry they made u look younger than u did in the first game i hate it. u deserved better baby) but lea. lea is still in the black org coat and there better be an explanation for that at the very least (or they just did trailers w him in the black coat and he does get an outfit that they didnt want to spoil??? i highly doubt this but i can hope)

i caved in and watched the leaked kh3 intro and a few things: 1) it really doesnt spoil that much and if u want to watch it but ur scared, literally dont be its fine. 2) its good, but squeenix has REALLY lost its touch w intro movies nowadays. they cram every second w symbolism and they dont take their time to just.... show us something good. like i couldnt blink at all during this intro lmfao. its a little annoying but despite all that, its alright. 3) the first minute of face my fears is CHILLING, WIG-SNATCHING, LIKE UTADA IS A LYRICAL AND MUSICAL GENIUS, but then the rest of the song is objectively awful im sorry its true and im gonna say it

last hot take: i usually hate remasters and re-releases, but im glad squeenix released all the kh games on one platform eventually. that being said, kh1.5 and kh2.5 dont have shit on the original ps2 titles. i completely realize i sound like a bitter old man but i dont care, the original numbered titles are better on ps2.

#p #i wanna talk about kh more but like literally no one in my life knows what the fuck i'd be talking about so this is my only outlet lmfao

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i-jus-wanna-writehappy · 6 years

Text

As Old As Time [2/?]

Pairing: teen!Richie Tozier x black!fem!Reader

Warnings: cursing, hateful act towards reader racially

Author's Note: I love writing this piece, and I can't wait to get further into the story. I hope you enjoy this addition :)

Part 1

Masterlist Black Girl Insert Series

* * * * *

Stan groans as he looks at his watch for the tenth time, "Richie, it's 1:45! She isn't coming, can we just go do what we had originally planned?" Richie throws his head back in a dramatic groan, "Fine! Fine, you guys go, I'm gonna catch up in a minute." Richie begins pushing his bike towards the main road with a scowl on his face.

"Where are you going now?" Ben asks, voicing what they were all thinking. Richie doesn't look back at them as he answers, "I'm gonna go ask Y/N who the hell she thinks she is."

You're shimmying to the music coming from your radio as you place more of your clothes in your wardrobe when your mom knocks on your bedroom door. Holding the pile in one arm, struggling to keep the clothes from hitting the floor, you pull the door open with your newly free hand. Before you can say anything though, your mom is speaking, "There's some boy I've never seen before pounding on our door and yelling your name."

Silently cursing Richie - it has to be Richie, unless that Stan guy is here to try and push you around - you set the clothes on your bed and grumble all the way to the door.

As soon as you pull the door open, you're face to face with an aggravated Richie Tozier. "What the hell, Y/N!" Before he can curse anymore, you push him back onto the porch and follow him out, closing the door to hide him from your parent's prying eyes.

Once you're safe from any eavesdropping, you remove your hand from Richie's chest and wrinkle your eyebrows at him in question, "What the hell, you! What did I do? And how do you even know where I live?"

Shaking his head, Richie crams his hands in his pockets, "Listen doll, you're gonna have to actually show up for our dates if you ever expect to get in my pants." Richie feels his stomach flutter a bit when you snort a harsh laugh at the line and mentally reminds himself to ask Eddie if he has any meds for fluttering stomachs, because surely it isn't natural. "Really though, no shit, we waited for over an hour."

You can't help but rub your face as you respond, "Richie, I told you I would try to come out. I just moved in yesterday, I'm still unpacking." Richie sighs dramatically, throwing his head back before looking at you again, "Well, have you gotten any unpacking done?"

When you nod, Richie smiles widely, "Great! You can come down to that awful parade with us and be back home in time to put the rest of your stuff away." Instead of letting you answer, Richie grabs your hand and begins pulling you off your porch, "Whoa, Tozier! Give me a second. I still have to tell my parents I'm leaving." The boy groans, but he releases your hand to let you run back up your porch.

"Fuck, that took forever. Can we go now?" Richie pressures as you return with your notebook and pen in hand. Shaking your head in amusement, you begin following Richie down the sidewalk, "And, just so you know, the next time you pop up at my house and don't want my parents to kill us both, introduce yourself and try not to yell fuck or shit while banging the door down. I almost got slapped on both our behalf."

Richie laughs, throwing his arm over your shoulder and pulling you close, "Well, baby doll, I can't make any promises until you stop standing me up."

You and Richie stay this way until you get to the cinema. All of his friends are standing outside, seemingly waiting for the two of you. Once you reach them, Richie jostles your body beneath his arm, "Y/N, these losers are the Losers. Losers, this is Y/N, the reason we all waited in fiery heat for two hours."

A tall boy with a handsome face shakes his head, "I'm Bill." Nudging Richie's arm from your shoulders, you hold your hand out to Bill, "I only told Richie I would try to make it." From there, everyone else introduces themselves, all with easy to remember names. And heaven knows that when you saw Mike it took everything in you to not throw your arms around him. You were positive that there were no other black people in Derry, so his rich brown skin is a welcome surprise.

Once everyone else has finished talking to you, Richie throws his arm around your shoulder, pulling you to his left side and with his other arm, he pulls Eddie into his right side, "Are you losers ready to see the coolest thing you will ever witness?" Breaking away from you, Richie starts screeching in Eddie's ear and clawing at him, "Jurassic Park!"

Eddie's arms flail as he attempts to push Richie away from him and the sight makes you laugh. Mike notices you writing quickly in your notebook as you look from the page to Richie and Eddie, "So, are you a writer?" He asks, making sure to stand across from you so he doesn't seem as if he's trying to invade your privacy, a luxury you haven't gotten im Richie's company alone.

You nod as you finish your note and put your pen back in your pocket, "I like to think so. Derry and the people here have already proved to be more than enough inspiration." Mike laughs as you sigh dramatically, "Hopefully nothing too bad. The quarry is beautiful, I would definitely recommend getting some inspiration from there, even if you don't go with us."

Richie notices you and Mike talking and inserts himself in the conversation immediately, "Alright then, Mike. Leave all flirtatious banter up to me, that's my role here." The comment makes you roll your eyes as you gesture to the Jurassic Park poster on the door to the cinema, "Sure, Richie. Are you all going to see Jurassic Park before the parade?"

Ben nods, but before he can ask if you want to watch it with them, Richie throws his arm back over your shoulder, "Why? Worried you'll get scared, baby doll? If that's the case, we could always just sit in the back and make out the whole time." With a snort, you move Richie's arm and turn to face him, your hand shielding your eyes from the sun, "No, I already saw it, I'm gonna watch The Good Son the room over."

The boys all stop, their eyebrows raised, "The one with Macaulay Culkin?" Ben asks you with his face scrunched up. You smile widely and nod, "Yeah. I've been wanting to watch it, I love those kinds of movies." Eddie just shakes his head quickly and reaches into his fanny pack for a piece of gum, "I don't know why. That looks creepy. I hope I never have to watch it."

Everybody seems to agree, so you just chuckle and make your way into the cinema, "Okay then. I guess I'll see you guys on the other side." Richie feels his fingers twitching anxiously before making his decision, "Fuck." He mutters, as he makes his way beside you at the ticket booth, "Make that two for The fucking Good Son."

You can't help the chuckle that passes your mouth when Richie groans at having his money taken and trudges behind you to the candy counter. Once you're equipped with Twizzlers, slushies, popcorn, and Milk Duds, you and Richie find two seats in the room together, his leg bouncing the entire time.

"Come on, Tozier," You whisper as the trailers start, "What's the big deal?" Richie doesn't appreciate your teasing tone, though, scoffing as he wipes a hand full of popcorn grease onto his shorts, "I just don't like the idea of seeing sweet little Kevin McCallister creeping people out and killing kids. Fucking sue me."

Sighing dramatically, you rearrange your snacks in your lap so you can lean closer to Richie, "Look, Rich, if you get too scared, you can hold my hand. I'll keep it free, just in case." This seems to snap Richie from his fearful sulking as he sits up in his seat and turns to you with a shit eating grin on his face, "Jesus, Y/N, if you wanted to hold my hand, you could have just asked. You didn't have to force me to watch this creepy ass movie with you."

Richie is satisfied with your silence at his line when he sees you pull out your pen and scribble in your notebook quickly.

For the rest of the trailers, you sit quietly. You are stuffing your face, watching the terrifying scenes intently, but Richie has decided to make staring at you his incredibly valid reason for not watching the scary previews to movies he'll pretend won't give him nightmares for months. Your braids are pulled into a ponytail today, probably for unpacking. He wants to ask a thousand questions about your hair, but knows that even for a guy that can't keep his fucking mouth shut, that's something he doesn't yet have the privilege to do.

His eyes wander from your ponytail to your neck. The brown skin there is tantalizing. Richie nearly falls into a trance thinking of burying his face there for days, hours, seconds, an eternity. His emotions are effecting him so strongly that Richie is suddenly hit with the wonder of how any of the girls in town can resist Mike. Surely, for his attention to be so solitary, so focused, just on the beauty of your skin, it has to be magic. And if you have this magic, then doesn't Mike?

Richie finds he is actually about to vocalize his question, but your excited squeal notifies him that the movie has indeed started, and Richie's bravery tucks itself safely into the salmon pocket of his Hawaiian shirt. "Hey, doll, you know, my offer to suck face and ditch the movie still stands." Richie says, quite unable to not watch the screen, despite his anxious nerves.

When you just snort softly and grab Richie's hand in yours, he's glad, not only for his awful job of hiding his fear, but also your observant nature. Yeah, Richie still crouches low in his seat, but if you let him tell it, he's pretending to still be creeped out so he can keep your hand in his.

By the time the movie is over, Richie is sniffling hard and his hand is squeezing yours tightly. "That was fucking intense." Richie says, still not standing from your seats. The movie wasn't scary, so you know his hand isn't shaking from horror, but maybe some different kind of fear. "You ready to go to the parade with your friends, Richie?" He nods at your question, but still doesn't move. Instead, Richie turns his head to you with a look so different from his usual boyish one that you have to remember to write about it once he lets your hand go, "Can we just sit here for a minute?"

Richie pulls himself together after two minutes and when he looks to you again, all traces of fear, all traces of internal crisis are erased. "Let's go see if the guys are out." Richie says, standing and tugging at your conjoined hands gently. If he can pretend nothing happened, then so can you, for now.

"You know, Richie, the scary movie is off now. You can let my hand go." When you say this, Richie just lets out a quick laugh and stops walking so he can push his face close to yours, "Oh no, on the contrary, Y/N. I watched that scary movie with you, so whenever I see you, I'll be scared all over again. I will need to hold onto you, it's all up to you if it's your hand I'm holding, baby girl."

The cheeky comment is one of many you've heard from Richie, so you just shake your head and push him back, "Your friends aren't out here, go see how much time they still have left of Jurassic Park." When you release Richie's hand, his eyebrows jump up, "Okay, and where are you going?" He reaches for your hand again, but you slap his before it can reach you, "Settle down, Richie. I'm just gonna start walking to the ice cream parlor, okay? Hurry up and meet me, then you can hold my hand all you'd like."

Richie chuckles and tells you to walk slowly before racing to the ticket booth. It's a beautiful day, so you pull out your pen and take a quick note of Richie's shift of behavior in the theater while you meander down the sidewalk. You don't make it very far before Richie steps out and spots you just down the way, head down in your notebook.

He's about to tell you that the rest of the Losers will be approximately 45 minutes, but then time seems to slow when the car beside you slows down. Richie sees you look up, and he grudgingly thinks that maybe you know the guys, but when one throws a cup of pop out of the window and the other calls you the n-word, that thought is dismissed and his grudge is a pit of fiery anger in his stomach.

The guys drive off, but not without Richie rushing after the car, "What the fuck!" He yells after the guys, his hands raised high so they can convey a similar message. Getting his wits about himself, Richie rushes over to you, "Holy shit, Y/N, are you okay? Did they hit you?"

Fortunately, the douche bag had awful aim, so you missed the brunt of the hit, the cup exploding at your feet and spraying pop onto your bare legs and light grey shoes. Sighing heavily, you nod, "Yeah, just a little - do people pull shit like that all the time?" Your anger is evident and growing the longer you look at the soda on the pavement. "Let's go get you cleaned up, okay? We can go get you cleaned up, we can get ice cream, we can forget all about those stupid fucks."

Before you can deny for the option of following those guys and kicking their asses, Richie grabs your hand and pulls it gently, "Come on. The guys have almost another hour, and now you'll have an excuse to sneak me into your bathroom while you get undressed."

Richie effectively takes your mind off your frustrations as you snort and let him tug you along.

#richie tozier #richie tozier imagine #richie tozier x reader #black!reader #black!fem!reader #black reader insert #bgis #black girl insert series #it 2017 imagine #it 2k17 #the losers club #bwwm imagine #losver

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jeongincore · 6 years

Text

Shit i really liked and kinda didn’t like about Ragnarok

I recently saw ragnarok and became so rejuvenated that i brought my marvel blog back but i wanted to seriously talk about like things that i liked and really didn’t just to get shit out there.

Things i really liked (like so much that i am obsessed)

-Thor’s new hair cut/outfit, i think its actually super suitable. Gives that sort of cool ass warrior refugee look. Plus, Chris Hemsworth is beautiful.

-The humor, oh god it was hilarious, i’ve never laughed so genuinely and so much in my life and it made the movie so charming and relatable. It was also such a departure from The Dark World and the first Thor, which dealt with so much emotional baggage for not only just Thor, but for Loki, who basically suffered throughout both movies.

-Hulk being an actual toddler/Bruce Banner being so fucked up and anxious because WHEN DID HE GET ON AN ALIEN PLANET.

-”You’ve been on other planets before i assume” “Yeah, one!” “well now it’s two”

-Valkyrie. Her entire everything gave me so much to love and adore. Tessa Thompson has stole my heart yet again.

-TAIKA WAITITI AS KORG WAS ACTUALLY SO FUNNY

-The little tiny glimpses of Loki and Thor’s childhood, aka the snake story, get help. It really showed how much time Loki and Thor had spent together, which i assume is a lot because age in Asgardian years work differently probably? Like imagine that, Loki and Thor spending time together and being inseparable for 100 years. It showed that they were always close despite loki feeling different or alienated, which explains why its so hard for Loki to just leave thor for dead.

-”You’ll always be the god of mischief, but you can be so much more” See that shit destroyed me. Thor acknowledges that Loki is not like him. He’s a trickster, manipulative, and selfish. But he also acknowledges that Loki is so much more than his tricks and lies, which shows so much character growth in Thor, who sees loki as more than just an asgardian prince that was raised the exact same way opposite of Thor, but as his own fucking person.

-Thor actually not being stupid and falling for Loki’s tricks, aka his magic projections of himself/his petty, stupid betrayals. Tom mentioned that Thor was evolving and that Loki was finally starting to realize that he’s the only one not growing. Scenes like the betrayal scene and the snake scene, although meant to be hilarious, point out that Thor isn’t that idiot that just was too trusting of his brother, he sees through Loki’s tricks, he’s seen them for years, and it really shows that Loki’s getting predictable with his fake deaths and betrayals, which might hint at him changing?

-IT FIXED THE INCONSISTENCIES. The main reason i didn’t like Dark world, though i did see it as amazing for its ability to mix the emotional darkness between Loki and Thor along with the humor throughout the movie, was because it pointed Loki out to be the type of cold blooded monster that would murder his own father. I mean I’m no Loki apologist, i love the kid but he’s killed, he’s manipulated, he’s hurt everyone around him, but i doubt he could ever kill Odin, no matter how much of a shitty father he is. Also low-key hated the whole “Loki if you betray me, ill kill you” Thor bullshit. We all know thor wouldn’t be able to do that, he still hopes Loki is his brother.

-AGAIN, THE SNAKE SCENE WAS SO FUNNY.

-”I thought the world of you Loki.” Ouch.

-Hulk and Val’s bromance.

-The entire Valkyrie v. Hela scene. It was so beautiful and ethereal i actually nutted.

-LOKI DIDN’T NEED TO COME BACK. HE DIDN’T NEED TO GO BACK TO THE SHIP WITH THOR. HE DIDN’T NEED TO GO BACK TO ASGARD. HE COULD HAVE NOT. BUT HE DID. BECAUSE SOMEWHERE IN THERE UNDER THE SELFISHNESS MAYBE HE CARES.

-Loki’s face when odin called him his son.

-Loki’s face when Hela told him to kneel.

-Loki refusing to let Thor go back to Asgard. “Are you serious? you can’t be thinking of going back there, that’s madness!” is that? Loki cARING?

-Loki’s character development.

-thor in a jean jacket and hoodie in new york.

-Thor spilling beer everywhere.

-Loki letting Thor take the orgy ship.

-Jeff Goldblum. Thats it.

-LOKIS FACE WITH THOR AND ODIN ON THE ROOF OF THE CASTLE I SCREmed AFTER ALL LOKI DID HE WAS STILL PUT THERE AS A PRINCE OF ASGARD BYE.

-”Hello father” “OH SHIT”

-The entire play. Loki’s rule as a benevolent god/king in which, before everyone feared him for a dictatorship militaristic form of ruling he could have, but in reality he just like ate grapes and watched plays.

-Thor wanting to be a Valkyrie. The crowned prince of asgard, wanting to be an elite team of woman warriors.

-VAL IS GAY AND IN TESSA THOMPSONS WORDS, HAD A GIRLFRIEND THAT SACRIFICED HERSELF TO SAVE HER.

-Val kicking Loki’s ass.

-THE RETURN OF THE DOUBLE BLADES OUT OF NOWHERE.

-Loki in a suit.

-HEIMDALL I LOVEJWIFHTGE.

-”I thought you didn’t want to talk about it” “heres the thing”

-”Hello!” “Hi” *blasts everyone in room with giant laser guns*

-”What are you? Thor, god of hammers?”

-IMMIGRANT SONG.

-”i swear i left him right here” “where? on the street? Or in that nursing home thats being torn down?”

“I’m not a witch” “Why do you dress like one then?”

-Loki rolling his eyes when thor is approached by fans.

-Loki calling stephen strange a shitty sorcerer and going at him with stabby hands.

-Confirmation of loki’s love of stabbing.

-Confirmation that Loki is a snake, and also Thor’s favorite snake.

-Loki reciting Thor’s prayer to odin with him mY SON.

-The avengers parallel. “He’s my brother!” “adopted.”

-”mbLERG ITS ME”

-”AGH LOKI!”

-’DIRECT ME TO WHO’S ASS I HAVE TO KICK”

-”Where? the devil’s anus?”

-Bruce fighting evil with fireworks. Good job sweetie.

-Bruce flopping like a fish on the bifrost.

-Thor and his sparkles.

-Lightning eyes.

-Odin finALLY DYING. THANK GOD.

-*Loki on a death trip* ‘this is a terrible idea”

-Loki somehow reciting a spell to bring surtur back. what a weirdo. how did he know that.

-LOKI COMING BACK.

-im here.

-Loki

-Brodinson.

-Thor and Bruce’s bromance.

-Jane not being there. I mean it makes sense she dumped him, he left her for two years chasing down infinity stones and constantly almost dying while she had no way of contacting him because Thor’s ass didn’t know how to use fucking email. Also i just really honestly never liked her character to begin with, i mean sure i love that Jane is a strong, smart woman but tbh i just wanted to Fast forward every time she was on screen.

-The cute death wolf.

-”THATS HOW IT FEELS!” “sorry i just really like the sport”

-THOR ACTUALLY BEING PORTRAYED AS LESS OF A JERK WITH CACTUSES SHOVED UP HIS RECTUM AND MORE LIKE THE SWEET, CHARMING, CHARISMATIC AND SLIGHTLY ARROGANT BUT MEANS WELL MAN HE IS.

-Val being there as a cool as member of the team rather than just the love interest of Thor. Protect her at all cost even though she probs doesn’t even need it.

-”I’VE BEEN FALLING FOR THIRTY MINUTES”

-Stan Lee’s cameo as the dude who cut Thor’s hair. Thank you for doing all of us a giant favor. Please do the same to Loki.

-loki beating someone up with his horn hat.

-Loki twirling his horn hat.

-Loki being such a self serving, extra asshole that he came from the fucking fog screaming “YOUR SAVIOR HAS ARRIVED”

-Bruce asking where tony was and then complaining about his tight crotch pants.

-LOKI’S COSTUME CHANGE GOD I HATED THE OLD ONES BLESS UP.

-Loki’s costume being mainly blue, black, and gold :-)))))))

-Loki being 100% done with everything that happens.

-Val knocking Loki out when he makes her relive her trauma why do people ship this you go honey that was a dick move

-Thor throwing various things at Loki to make sure he’s not a mirage.

-he’s a friend from work, something a kid from make a wish that met chris suggested, being in the film and all of the trailers. I hope that made that kid smile.

-”In return, i wish to be granted safe passage through the anus”

-LOKI FINALLY ACCEPTING THAT HE DIDN’T WANT THE THRONE WITHOUT A FAMILY. THAT HE’D RATHER WATCH HIS BROTHER TAKE IT AND STILL HAVE A BROTHER THAN HAVE A THRONE WITH NO ONE TO SHARE IT WITH.

-LOKI SHOWING UP ON SCREEN DURING THOR’S CORONATION.

-Loki being genuinely worried about and double checking if Thor really wants to bring him back to earth after what he did kill me honestly that would probably hurt less.

-Loki’s face when thor said that going their separate ways was what Loki always wanted bc in reality that is the opposite go back.

-Hela not being Loki’s daughter because 1) it proves that ya’ll should stop hoping that a comic soap opera about rich petty alien boys with daddy issues would be anything like classic norse mythology, and 2) when the fuck and how the fuck and why the fuck

-Loki suggesting that he and Thor both rule over Sakaar together lmao ouch.

-Loki just being really cute and quirky.

-Thor being so fucking amazed by Val all the time.

-”You’re late.”

-”I saw you coming” “course you did.”

-THE GUNS NAMED DES AND TROY I WANTED TO FUCKING DIE.

What i didn’t like much;

-Hela. I loved her character, but honestly here is where i think there might’ve been some failure despite how much i loved that movie. She seemed so out of place as a villain, and i feel like the whole related shit tried to mimic Guardians vol. 2, but honestly the fact that Thor didn’t care much about her made her feel so out of place. But i did like some parts, like how she was so disappointed about not being remembered or what her existence and disappointment did to how loki was raised.

-Dr. Strange? Ok that was weird. It makes sense and it was funny to see him but to be honest i wasn’t into it.

-tHE SCENE WITH VAL AND A GIRL BEING CUT. WHYWHYWHY

-tbh was not fond of frost master, don’t hate me.

-Loki possibly taking the tesseract????? And hinting that he might turn evil again??? don’t do this to me marvel.

-loki possibly being turned into the quirky sidekick of his brother. Loki is Thor’s equal, not his annoying little brother/wacky sidekick. I didn’t get that vibe often, but sometimes i did honestly.

-RIP thor’s hammer.

-ODIN BEING A PIECE OF SHIT YET AGAIN.

-Hela’s entrance. it was so quick and like out of place i was like what wait, Loki and thor didn’t even have time to prepare or even mourn.

-the comedy. It was its best and worst part of the movie. Sometimes it was tasteful. Other times it was too much. Thor and Loki didn’t even get to mourn for their dad who tbh was an asshole but still their dad before there was a annoying joke about kneeling. It took away from the story sometimes.

-the lack of hugging between thor and loki.

-The way they glossed over the warriors three’s death like they weren’t Thor’s closest friends and the only ones there for him when Odin tried to banish Thor to earth :-))))) I mean after all that shit he went through I’m pretty fucking sure it probably hasn’t caught up to him but ya bitch still pissed.

-The way, Thor, who basically admitted that Loki actually meant the world to him and was the only family he had left, didn’t ask where he was after asgard exploded? Like tbh i get it, he trusts Loki, his brothers capable and strong and most of all really fucking smart, but i’d still be like :-) the fuck is Loki. I think this is a directing error though rather than like the characters fucking up but i was freaking out, i mean asgard was literally pebbles and everyone was out BUT my son.

-No sif, i mean i get it Jaime Alexander was busy but like y'all could’ve explained smh.

-Loki not getting a hair cut. When will his emo phase end.

-Not getting that one flashback to 80′s asgard with mullets and emo loki.

Overall it was pretty fucking cool, one of the best movies of the trilogy. I fell in love with the marvel cinematic universe all over again. But it wasn’t perfect.

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2djdanger · 7 years

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RAMBLINGS OF AN ANIMATION STUDENT ON THE BOSS BABY AND THE INDUSTRY ITSELF AND WHY I LOVE THE BOSS BABY WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL:

Words cannot describe the love I have for The Boss Baby. I saw an advanced screening of it a few weeks back with the director there & it blew my mind it’s like 3D animation meets 2D along with gorgeous art & so many opposites attract motifs like the baby acting like an adult & the graphic bold bright comic book feel type scenes that also meet this almost soft pastel 1950s/1960s vibe going on. AND THE EMOTION IN EVERYONES FACES AGH IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY AS AN ANIMATOR!!! It’s such a fast paced movie & everything happening at once & throughout all this everyone’s showing a variety of different emotions in a few seconds & the writing is amazing like not many animated films these days go back to the roots of traditional animation & just making it for a wide variety of an audience from all walks of life instead of making the same movie over & over again with great animation but a story line that seems rushed & choppy & not thought out but they keep making sequels anyways whether we wanted them or not just because m o n e y. I’m looking at u Disney with almost everything & Illumination with Despicable Me. It’s not to say that I don’t like sequels bc those companies have made some I enjoyed but it makes me disappointed when they could be putting their talents towards something fresh & new & original. This movie was o r i g i n a l in every sense of the word. Go take your kids to see it, yourself, your parents (I took mine & im a fully grown adult as are they & we loved it), your grandparents, your grandparent’s grandparents!!! It’s so great!!! It’s literally what the 3D animation community needed. I’m a traditional/2D animator myself & it seems more of the 2D movies out there recently have been trying to keep it original and don’t even get me started on the amount of work the animators do in not only 2D but 3D as well. But like recently 3D animation seems obsessed with the technology realizing they can make anything look more & more realistic nowadays then say when Pixar created Toy Story & their shorts in the 80s. These big companies keep churning out these movies not putting much thought into it & spending everything to make it look as real as possible. But that’s not the point of animation at all! They’re losing touch with why we animate in the first place!!! As my old storyboarding teacher once told our class on why we animate, we animate because it shouldn’t be possible in the real world. When you make anything animated you should stop & think: why am I making this story animated? Does it really need to be animated? Can I do this in live action? If you can make a story in live action then why are you animating it at all in the first place? It doesn’t need to be animated! Literally animation is just beautiful. You can do anything with it. And more & more especially with the technology in 3D films they’re slipping away from those values & ideas & making things that can be replicated in live action. So to see The Boss Baby really utilize the original concept of animation to tell that beautiful crazy impossible story & to top it off tell it through the bright eyes of an over imaginative child make it all the more better because it gives way to these big brilliant imagination sequences with these bold graphic designs that I’d die for. The editing and the animation in this movie is literally perfection it’s one thing flows into another into another into another & it works ANNND THERES EVEN GOOD COMEDIC TIMING!!! Sometimes movies live action & animated just can’t capture that kind of fast paced back to back tension followed by good comedic timing so to the writing team on The Boss Baby I say bravo to you & to the animators as well because God knows how difficult it is to draw out a normal sequence of actions but to follow the writing & get that vision out there in the open & follow it & draw it out so every detail works that’s just insane. This movie just inspires me so much & it’s relatable. My childhood was like Tim’s where everything was perfect & I was happy until my baby sister came along & we went at it for years. Another thing back to the genius writing in the film is this style where it forces you into Tim’s shoes because when they first introduce Boss Baby & for the first half of the film you’re made to hate him & he acts as the villain of the film until about halfway through Boss Baby really comes out of his 1 dimensional evil villain shell & just sees Tim in distress & reveals why it’s not only bad for Tim the current situation but why it’s bad for him too & then proceeds to give Boss Baby this insane narrative & beautifully tragic multidimensional backstory. Tim as the first main character has already been developed as a multidimensional character with different feelings & emotional expressions because he doesn’t know much about the world except for his imagination since he is a kid but by showing this then completely flipping everything on it’s head & giving Boss Baby real flaws & strengths that balance out Tim’s strengths & weaknesses it makes them seem a lot more like real relatable people & more so like siblings who depend on each other. As an older sister I can say some of my weaknesses end up being my sisters strengths & vice versa. Then by the end of the film,Boss Baby is this character you can't help but love & root for hoping he wins & can get out of the bad situations like when his formula was stolen so he kept going baby again it's like you feel panicked because you don't want Boss Baby to be normal you want him to be his crazy quirky self. Also this whole tragic narrative really hit me like it just stuck with me because I’m a sucker for these kinds of dark/sad stories layered in a brighter happier story & they coexist in harmony like that’s when you know a film’s really working. So SPOILERS AHEAD even though if you got this far there have already been some light spoilers I couldn’t avoid talking about but these get right into the grit of it. So the idea that Boss Baby was never really born fascinates me. In this world in the movie it makes sense. It’s also really sad as Tim points out as we’re finding out more about Boss Baby that he never had a childhood & how Boss Baby even says himself he was “born” or more so created (in both the universe of the movie & if he was self aware ((which he isn’t but for the sake of explaining this just humor the thought if he was)) that he was created as a character to work in this movie world realm plane of existence whatever you want to call it) all grown up as an adult in a baby’s body. Just think about that for a minute. What if you were born an adult & never went through childhood, never had a family, no one ever loved you or played with you or anything, all you knew was co-workers & business stuff. You never had fun or imagined things. That’s a really sad life if you ask me personally. He never had a chance to be creative or find himself all he knew was what the cold adult business school taught him from day 1. Most adults these days forgot what it was like to be a child & have fun & I think that’s what they were trying to get at with this backstory especially when Tim’s on the plane to Vegas with Boss Baby & just trying to teach him in small little ways how to use his imagination & just be a kid & not be so serious & black & white all the time. Also, I feel like that’s the issue sometimes with my own parents. As an animator I see animated movies as just another way of telling a story whereas people like my parents who don’t understand much from my line of work see it as a children’s media with no substance & pretty pictures. I want to break that barrier because the first animated pieces were NOT made for kids they were for other adults. I feel like it shouldn’t matter anyways if the movie’s marketed for kids because it could always be a good movie regardless of that & people like my parents forget what it’s like to have fun & see a good kids movie. They were kids once, we all were. As with many animated films before it, The Boss Baby brings subtle tasteful adult humor to the film as well as some just downright outrageous adult humor like Boss Baby running around butt naked with a censor bar over his nether regions. When you can marry adult & child humor together in a movie & make it work nicely it’s always a sign of a good movie. So tonight’s the opening night of The Boss Baby in cinemas everywhere & because I have so much love for this movie after seeing the advanced screening & listening to the director, producer, & designer from the movie speak about it & their own experiences they put into this film, like I stated before I dragged my parents out of the house on a Friday night when they would normally be in bed sleeping really early & shared the joy & beauty of the animated feature film with them. Normally my dad’s the one who will give almost any film a try & watch it & really like it. My mom however is extremely picky & if it doesn’t please her in the first 10 minutes or less she will zone out & fall asleep taking a nap through over half the movie. Both of my parents were on the edge of their seats tonight paying the utmost attention to the movie. It was a really beautiful moment to see my parents actually giving this animated movie a shot & they both ended up loving it as much I did on my second go seeing it. I’m not gonna lie I saw the trailers for this movie late last year & it caught my interest but I had this nagging thought that it wasn’t going to be a fresh new story it would just be typical & only made to make some money & keep Dreamworks in the game another year. I was happily proven wrong & this movie just takes everything about these money making no story movies & flips it on its head entirely. I even bought the art book for The Boss Baby because the artwork alone is enough to inspire me while working on my own projects. And that my friends is why you need to see The Boss Baby

TL;DR: The Boss Baby is an A+ gorgeously animated film with a breath of fresh air new story told in a way that’s really interesting & new & takes you back to the old days of 2D animation classics despite being a 3D film so disregard Rotten Tomato’s obviously wrong ratings & go see it for yourself because as an animator this movie makes me happy & I want to live in it forever ❤️❤️❤️

#the boss baby #the boss baby spoilers #animation #3d animation #2d animation #classic animation #animation student #movie review #new movie 2017 #give all your money to the boss baby bc the good people at dreamworks who worked on this film deserve it all #dreamworks #dreamworks skg)

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letters-iwillnevergiveyou · 5 years

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New Years Eve Bulls7$*t

Dec. 31 2018

So you did the unthinkable, the unimaginable. You actually left me on New Years Eve at home by myself. I knew there was a big possibility this would happen. You said you had business to take care of but after I asked you not to leave me alone on New Years you ended up telling me you were staying home because I couldn't go with you to take care of this business. I don't understand you. You always tell me that but then I find out you pick up D.J. and she goes all over with you. So you leave me home alone constantly and take someone else with you, all while telling me you are alone. And you wonder why I can't trust you. You also said you were alone yesterday and couldn't call me. Come to find out that too was a lie. D.J. was with you. You could have called me all along you just didn't.

Anyway getting off track. Tonight. We go to the post office to send off records I'm selling. My dead husbands records I might add. To help us fund this trip to Belize. You didn't get tracking numbers, or a receipt. I'm totally screwed. All these people are expecting a product and by a certain time. I'm already a month late because of you. You couldn't go back in and get the numbers because they closed. Then you take me to get food. Finally. I told you I was hungry at 12. It was after 6 by this time. Then we go home. You took your apartment key off the ring so I could get inside, telling me you were going to finish hooking up your stereo. I stupidly listened and believed you. After I went inside you took off. The only reason I knew is because I was using your mobile hotspot and when it disconnected I looked outside and you were gone. Now here I am with no phone, my boyfriend ditched me, my car that you have been using while yours has been broke down is now broke down, and I'm fucked again. How can you not see how fucked up this is? I should have taken your car and left you here to sit a couple days with no phone, no transportation and no money. I bet you wouldn't like it. What is wrong with you? How can you treat any human being like this let alone someone you supposedly love? I don't understand. I keep thinking maybe you just went up the street to your buddys house. Maybe you just needed a minute away. Maybe you will make sure to be back before midnight and kiss me, bring in the new year with me, the woman you love and want to do life with. But honestly, you don't do life with me now. You lead a triple life. There is the life you have with me. The one where I am like this secret. You talk a little, have sex with me, then immediately take a shower and off you go. You either stay in the bathroom on the phone or getting high, or you leave. There is the life of the drug dealer. You hang out with your friends and get high. You drive all over the place and do favors for people if there is money or drugs in it for you. Then there is the nice sweet man you pretend to be to the rest of the world. The man you tried to trick me into thinking you were. The one who says the right stuff and pretends to care about you and what you have been through. The guy who anticipates your needs and is there for you when you need him. He is a good dad and just misunderstood. He doesn't exist. He only exists in the 16 dating apps he is signed up in. You know the ones you told me were a "hobby" that you would give up when I told you it hurt me for you to talk to other women that way. Yeah those. I wonder if Sandy ever even cheated on you or if it was you that cheated. I have her number I should find out. Oh who cares I guess. It doesn't matter. You have hurt me more emotionally than I have ever been hurt in my life. I read an article online about signs that you are emotionally abused. Check it out. It's eerily familiar....

10 Brutal Signs Your Man Is An Emotionally Abusive Jerk

By Dr Annie Kaszina

How do you spot an emotional abuser? Most likely when a guy first comes a-wooing, he won’t be carrying his, “I’m an emotionally abusive man” placard. So how do you identify him before you get hurt?

Here are the tell tale signs that he is an emotionally abusive man:

1. He shows a lack of respect. Not all emotionally abusive men will show you a lack of respect from Day 1. Some will turn on the charm for a while — others won’t. But how do they behave toward other people and speak about them? If your boyfriend is critical or contemptuous of other people, be very aware that you have a short shelf life before you become those other people.

2. He always tells incredible hard luck stories about his past. Every emotionally abuser worth his salt has a great hard luck story about his tough past — and, boy, does he tell it well. Telling you his hard luck story is a neat ploy. You only have to respond like the uber-caring, empathic, trusting person you are for him to know you are his perfect… prey.

3. You notice worrying back stories about women. Yep, he’s the one who’s suffered at the hands of women who didn’t understand nor appreciate him. He’s been let down, treated badly, exploited, and robbed blind by past wives and/or girlfriends. His bitterness about these predatory b**ches sends a clear message about how he wants you to behave: no demands, no expectations, just 100% commitment to healing his hurts.

4. He has a bad behavior — or three — that needs to be fixed. That could include drug taking, alcohol abuse, leering at women, tight-fistedness, or anger issues. He’s a little bit broken, but hey, your middle name is Ms. Fix-Him.

5. He’s domineering, and/or jealous, controlling and self-centered. You can tell yourself he’s just “being a man,” but the reality is that he is establishing a power (im)balance in the relationship. It works on the principle that he has the lion’s share of the power, and you get the lion’s share of responsibility.

6. He gets star billing in the relationship — with all that, that entails — while you get to play the bit parts. He gets most of the airplay, and the limelight, etc. as befits the star. It won’t be too long before he lets you know that your job is to keep his trailer nice and tidy.

7. He has a short fuse. “Slow to anger,” “quick to forgive and forget,” and willing to own up to his own mistakes, are NOT accurate descriptions of him. He’s easily upset, he overreacts, and as he tells it, the problem was not of his making in the first place — so, he rarely has to get his head around the “S” word (that’s “SORRY” to you and me). He may well be a “potty mouth.” He certainly doesn’t react in a measured, adult way when he feels peeved and aggrieved.

8. He’s not 100 percent reliable, consistent or predictable. “Something comes up” or he’s feeling too tired or he’s been really, really busy. Showing consideration for you, your wishes, and your feelings is not his top priority.

9. He doesn’t let you have boundaries. He asks inappropriate personal questions early on. He rushes you and the relationship. He sets himself up as the authority on every area of your life — including family, friends, your working life, and even your finances.

10. He sets off warning bells in your gut. There was that moment right at the start when, from somewhere deep inside you, there bubbled up the awareness: “YUK. This guy is bad news.” Sadly, that feeling didn’t come with a 20-page PDF report, a government health warning, or even banner headlines anywhere you looked. So what did you? You ignored that feeling. “Listen, if it can’t give me a chapter and verse, why should I pay attention to it? It’s making a lot less noise than he does. Besides, he might be my last chance at happiness, right?” Your intuition doesn’t obsess about the past, or worry about the future. It simply comes to the right conclusion in the present moment. Its predictions are far more clear-sighted than yours are.

If you want to keep yourself safe from emotionally abusive men, you have to learn how to spot them. Emotionally abusive partners create massive mental, emotional and financial havoc in their victims’ lives. This article is here to spare you heartache and disappointment. Don’t be too blind to see them.

.............................................................................Wow. All I can say is wow. So lets break it down.

1. Lack of respect. I don't think I have ever seen you show anyone respect except when you talk about Charlie. Which comes from abuse of your own as a child.

2. Tells hard luck stories. Oh my god I won't even go there. You have a poor woe is me story to excuse every bad behavior.

3. Worrying back stories about other women. Yep! Helloo! The most horrible stories about the women from your past.

4. Bad behavior. Do I even need to go there?

I'll use short answers. Lying, cheating, manipulating, drugs, etc. etc. etc.

5. Domineering and/or jealous controlling and self centered. 150% yes yes yes. You make it very clear you are the boss. All these rules for me that just don't apply to you.

6. Star billing in the relationship. Umm ya. It's all about you. Always is.

7. Easily upset, overreacts, doesn't take responsibility. You get mad at me when I simply tell you how I feel. Or how your actions hurt me. You never apologize. You don't ever take responsibility. It's always someone elses fault or my fault. You will do something fucked up to me and it somehow is my fault. Every fucking time.

8. Not 100% reliable consistent or predictable. This is you. I never know what you are going to do. Even when you try to do better it might only last a day, a week, a month maybe an hour even. Point is, I never know what you are going to do. And you don't show you care about my feelings or needs no matter how clear I relay them to you. I am last on your priority list if I'm there at all. i.e. TONIGHT FOR EXAMPLE

9. The first part of this one eh not so much but the part about you being the authority on every area of my life is spot on. You don't let me have boundaries. You will tell off my entire family if you don't agree with them and my relationship with them. I have ostracized my entire support system because of you. I had it pretty good. My mother in law and I had a great relationship, so did me and my mom and sister. Now I have no one but you. Thanks for that.

10. Sets off warning bells in my gut. Yes, you did. From the very beginning. There was just something always nagging at me telling me you were full of shit. Like how anytime you did something shitty and I would try to talk to you about it, before I could say anything you would distract me by telling me something I wanted to hear. In fact the night you told me you were falling in love with me was one of those times. I was mad at you and said we needed to talk. I was about to tell you whats what when you blurt out you're falling in love with me and that i intimidated you and you didn't know how to act around me. Very fucking smooth.

So there you have it. I am officially the victim of emotional abuse. I never thought I would ever again be in a position to be abused ever again. Yet here I am. The stupid part is that if you were truly remorseful and made an effort I would stay. I would try to make this work. But who am I kidding? You don't love me and I'm not sure you are even capable of loving anyone. J---n lives to love and look after J---n. Ugh I'm fucking done with this entry. Worst New Years Eve I have ever fucking had. If you loved me you would want to be with me.

#alone tonight #new years eve #liar #shitty boyfriend #drugs over me #im done

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