#imma fight them deadass

[withgreatpowercomesmyfuckingdick]

Hi! Imma do something rare and actually make content, but its 11 at night and i just had a brain worm

for those of you that don’t know, i work at an accounting office. we do taxes. it is tax season. and now im thinking abt how AGSZC does taxes and what their papers are like and im inflicting it on the rest of you even if its gibberish

Angeal: A godsend. Keeps his forms in order and filed properly, calculates everything else himself like a good man. Papers honestly aren’t too bad, maybe 10-12 just because of his career/insurance plus his doubtless donations to charity, but aside from that. straightforward and done at his kitchen table

Genesis: A fucking NIGHTMARE. no doubt pays someone else to do it. and for fucks sake, i know he invests. constantly and consistently and probably in anything he thinks stands the slightest chance against shinra on the market. his 1099-B is a mess and definitely Not Totaled, so his is the bullshit you have to insert one. investment. at. a time. He’s the type that keeps fucking calling too, I can just tell. but, aside from the 1099-B, he’s probably got simple stuff as well. probably several 1099-INTs from several different bank accounts, maybe a couple 1098s floating around from vacation houses or some shit.

Sephiroth: Does his own. In ridiculously early. Makes almost no personal purchases so hardly has anything to pay. I can’t imagine not having a last name or not knowing his birthday doesn’t end up a legal problem somehow, so he likely has to walk directly into a damn tax office to say hey this is me and this is my shit no, someone isn’t stealing my identity. has one singular document and it’s his W-2. Which is. Fucking astronomical. Like, the number doesn’t even look right. His paycheck as a SOLDIER isn’t taxed, so he doesn’t really get much back on his refund. The only first without a healthcare /insurance form because why tf would Sephiroth have healthcare? What’s he gonna do, get sick?

not getting into how doing his own taxes was definitely a fight between him and Hojo at some point and ended up getting hashed out in a board room. Hojo didn’t like him having the autonomy of filing for himself instead of being claimed ad Hojo’s ‘dependent’. Sephiroth deadass threatened to go to court abt it. The President told Hojo to suck it up so they didn’t have to deal with scandal, Hojo wouldn’t tell Seph his birthday to be difficult, and here we are

Zack: Panicking. Late. Doesn’t know if his forms came in the mail, doesn’t know where he put them most of the time. Scrambles around for a fuck ton of receipts, ultimately has to request Shinra send him his shit again. DEFINITELY pays someone else to do it. W-2, 1095-A, 1099-C(s)(he has several debts i can feel it i love him but he screams bad financial decisions), probably some shit for his bike too. He customs it so I can see him listing some parts he buys for it as work expenses. Jokingly puts some money he gave aerith for flowers and what he spent to make her wagon as donations to charity and it actually goes through because the church is still considered a legal entity. Definitely has to pay late fees.

Cloud: Pays Tifa to do it. Filing for both of them is a nightmare cause all their shit burnt in Nibelheim, so once Edge gets right with the WRO they have to do all their paperwork from scratch and get reassigned SSNs. He genuinely has a fuckton of paperwork from doing the Strife Delivery Service. Luckily, only ‘employee’ he has is Tifa, and even then she doesn’t do things regularly aside from pick up the phone. Doesn’t make his business an LLC until he’s literally forced to due to his number of clients and someone trying to sue him for damages. 1099-NEC for TIfa for sure, then once he’s an LLC, some yearly maintenance to keep legal. Mileage and gas expenses go CRAZY on his self employment form, I fucking bet. I bet Cloud’s handwriting is shit tho. Tifa’s at her desk counting up his gains and losses for fucking ages because his fives look too similar to sixes. Eventually she wrangles him into installing some shit on his phone that counts it up, if only to cure her headache. Funnily enough, he does get veteran benefits from what’s left of Shinra’s shit, reparations of sorts, but he doesn’t keep it. All goes to charity, so that ends up in the books too.

alright, that was unnecessarily in depth and way longer than i planned. good night LMAO

[strawberry-milkbunny]

I have no one to talk to about Tokyo Rev so here r my random hot takes that I need to say:

- Emma and Hina r boring and used as romance plot devices it’s okay to admit that Wakui can’t write women idk I don’t expect shounen/men to be able to write girls well (still cried when Emma died tho bc she didn’t deserve it!!!)

- lol I LOVE Yuzuha and Senju tho

- I actually do like Emma and Draken together but I also firmly believe Draken is in love w/Mikey and was just projecting onto Emma LMAO

- Yuzuha is a lesbian

- Controversial: I don’t think Shinchiro was THAT great of an older brother. Like he was cool but he still introduced Mikey and Izana into the world of gang life/normalizing violence and yeah OG Black Dragons isn’t like that but….what do u expect when u form a gang??? .obviously there’s a high chance that it’s gonna develop into LEGIT gang activity

- As an adult and someone who was basically raised by an older sibling w/a big age gap (my sis is 7 years older) I kinda don’t blame Takeomi for being a bad older brother??? Realistically he’s a 17 yr old in charge of raising 2 toddlers like NO SHIT he did a bad job. At least Shin had his grandfather to help out but Takeomi actually had no one. Doesn’t explain y he’s a brokey LOL buttttt again I don’t FULLY blame him for being a bad sibling still hurt my boi Sanzu 😤😤

- I HC that Mikey is used to having a caretaker (Draken and later Sanzu) bc when Shin died he was so depressed and genuinely couldn’t get out of bed

- Takemitchy is also lowkey boring/typical shounen protagonist and canonically stinky like Hina could do sm better. This is personal preference so I find myself wanting more chaotic/dumb protagonists who are slightly morally ambiguous like Denji, Gintoki, hell even Naruto at times. Takemitchy didn’t get character development until BD arc and that’s just a bit too long for me….

- Koko and Inui r gay and dating 💅🏻💅🏻💅🏻

- the Haitani brothers r the kardashians of the TR universe they’re so embarrassing Deadass show up and pose/do absolutely nothing I LOVE THEM SHKSKSKSK

- I love how it’s universally agreed that Mitsuya and Chifuyu r the best bois

- I have mixed feelings about Izana. I genuinely do like him and DESPISE how he’s whitewashed by fanart

- I get it u genuinely just wanted to not be alone and found out ur adopted in the worst way possible but…..idk how that justifies killing ur own sister but u do u ig 🤷‍♀️ and u have KAKUCHO AS UR FAMILY WTH

- don’t listen to me tho I’m a Mikey and Sanzu stan LMAOO 🤭🤭🤭

- Izana is the definition of mommy issues and 100% had crunchy hair lik mans was homeless

- if I saw Izana IRL I would RUN 🏃‍♀️idk he looks a lil crazy

- also this man does not know Tagalog he didn’t even know he was Filipino until he was lik 12

- idk the Tenjiku arc is so funny to me bc Izana is deadass: imma kill everyone in Mikey’s life for revenge and Mikey is lik: bruh I didn’t even kno u existed until last week and now ur killing our sister UNPROVOKED ???

- Bonten!Mikey is a virgin/no libido mans is DEPRESSED

- wished the Bonten arc was longer simply for the outfits bc Wakui KNOWS FASHION but that shit was DEPRESSION

- 3 Deities Arc was amazing and also funny/serious at the same time. It literally was an all out brawl in an AMUSEMENT PARK

- fr tho wtf was Benkei, Wakasa and Takeomi doing there??? Like they’re canonically 27 GO GET A JOB STOP FIGHTING 15 YEAR OLDS SHKSKSKS

- U cannot tell me that Sanzu WASNT sad when Baji and Mucho died.

- Baji was straight up his childhood friend and the only one other than Senju who knows about the plane incident/Mikey’s possessive side. And In the OG!timeline I’m pretty sure Baji was the only friend Sanzu DIDNT attack. While with Mucho he was pretty much his older brother, Sanzu just decided Mikey was better

- Tbh if the dark impulses/Shin thing wasn’t real I would’ve firmly believed Mikey had DID or something. Which again made only worse by the fact that violence and death is such a regular thing in his life (GET THIS MAN THERAPY LIK WTF IS SHIN AND GRANDPA SANO DOING???)

- Kazutora going a lil crazy is lowkey expected and I hate how we only find out about his home life in the character books. This kid grew up in a physically and mentally abusive household (gaslight to pick between parents and as s/o who has experienced that shit it’s fucked up) and I rlly don’t think prison helped out his mental stability either no shit he tried to kill Mikey

- I don’t ship Mikey and Takemichy (despite the IMMENSE gay ness btwn them) firmly bc I think everyone can see how much power Takemitchy has over Mikey idk it has a weird power dynamic like if Takemitchy tried he could 100% control Mikey (platonically or romantically)

- Baji, Chifuyu and Kazutora r a throuple

- I HATE how Sanzu is reduced to this crazy drug addict. Sanzu is canonically smart, manipulative, and formally trained fighter. He also REMEMBERS the OG timeline, he had to experience Shin dying twice and everyone else die no shit he’s a little bonkers/needs drugs to take everything away. Plus his relationship to Mikey which tbh is a whole separate post

- controversial !!!: I ship Mikey and Sanzu or Mikey and Draken. Sanzu only bc this man has a big ass crush and deserves some niceness for once

- ppl write Kakucho as this shy, nice guy like ur not wrong but mans is also running UNPROVOKED into Yakuza offices like it’s the gym while dragging Rindou wit him 😭😭😭

- the haitanis r the best sibling duo

- It lowkey makes me mad in fanfics where Ran is depicted as cheating w/Rin’s gf like??? This man raised his younger brother himself u cannot tell me he doesn’t love his brother and would actually do that to him

- Ran would 1000% do anything for Rin and i firmly believe he kinda regrets not saying anything in court to prevent Rindou frm joining him in jail. Like saying he forced Rindou to kill someone w/him, abusing his brother at home, etc especially in the Bonten! tl he def thinks about wtf he dragged his brother into

- I also don’t think they’ve slept w/ the same person before. Idk I feel like they have diff types like Ran goes for more motherly/mature types while Rindou goes for sweeter/shy types

- Draken has road rage

- Yuzuha should’ve been taller like AT LEAST 5’7 bitch is related to Hakkai and Taiju for gods sake

- OG BD 100% thought Wakasa was a girl for at least a month. He’s canonically 5’3 and pretty.

- Characters who r 100% bisexual: WAKASA, Senju,maybe Hina, Draken (def in denial), Rindou, Ran (he’s a whore as long as ur pretty he’s down), Sanzu, Koko, Kazutora, Chifuyu

- Mitsuya had a crush on Draken

[zprites]

Rise! Turtles with Sick S/O Headcanons

So, since I am fighting for my life against mono (yet again), I wanted to write out some headcanons on how I think the Rise! boys would care for their sick S/O. Just a silly little list, but I hope ya'll enjoy!

Imma go lay down now.

Taglist: @turtle-babe83, @manduse, @morning-sun-brah, @crazysarah-98, @pacoholin, @iamdefinitelytheratking

Raphael

Look, he loves you with all his heart and will go to the ends of the earth if it would make you feel better

Will make darn sure you don't overexert yourself

Unfortunately this means that he will literally not let you get out of bed and insists on doing everything himself

Which can get a tad annoying, but his heart is in the right place

"Why aren't you in bed?", "Raph, babe, please I need to pee. No-stop! I don't need help, I can pee by myself!"

Will still hover outside the bathroom

Gives you so much water - wants to be sure you're getting enough fluids, bladder be damned

Out of meds? No problem - he will go to the drugstore at 4am to get you anything you might need

Leonardo

Will get you literally anything you need

Spoils you all the time already, but when you're sick? Oh boy, be prepared to be spoiled

However he will still find a way to tease/flirt in an effort to lift your spirits

“Hey, is it hot in here or is it just you?”, "Leo, my temperature is literally 100.4 F.", "Don't worry darling, I have the fire extinguisher ready in case you combust."

Having body aches? He's already drawn a warm bath with a few drops of eucalyptus oil with your name on it

Will also gently massage your body if it's super sore in some areas

Checks your temperature religiously while writing down everything in a little notebook to monitor how you're recovering

Expect to still get full on kisses on the mouth - he is not afraid to get sick too and suffer alongside you

Donatello

You bet your ass this man will show up in that hazmat suit from 'Down with the Sickness' to protect himself from getting sick

"Do you seriously have to wear that DeeDee?", "I love you, but the last thing I want is your germs invading my breathing space."

Will take it off if you're not contagious though

In the meantime, this man will try to narrow down exactly what you have contracted and help you accordingly

Knows exactly what meds to give you for any symptom as well as dosages

Because of this, be prepared for alarms to go off every hour or so

May or may not have invented a 'cure-all' pill when you had a really bad sick spell

It may have made things worse - still feels totally guilty about it and is still making it up to you years after the fact

Michelangelo

Makes you the best soup - the kind that is simmering on the stove for several hours and made with so much love

Best believe that if you're being stubborn about meds he will slip them into your food or drink

“Here, drink this.”, "Ew, do I have to? It tastes digusting.", "That means it's good for you, now drink it all sweetie."

Not above bringing out Dr. Delicate Touch if needed

Will make sure you are comfortable and will deadass try to cuddle your sickness away

Grabs all your blankets and pillows you own and will make a fort on your bed

Snuggles and forehead kisses galore

Lets you pick out what to watch together and makes no complaints

[candeathbereal]

My opinions on some of the Venus signs

(Those included are Aries, Gemini, Leo, Virgo, and Libra)

Here we go folks

Let’s start with Aries Venus. Now I myself am an Aries Venus and I have only this to say really. I love us, like friendship wise love an Aries Venus. Now I can't really say anything relationship wise besides what I am like in a relationship cause I haven't dated another Aries Venus. Now I think I would enjoy dating an Aries Venus simply because we are usually blunt when it comes to the ways of the heart. Deadass I have started dating and broke up with someone all in the same day, but I also have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost four years now. The one thing I have stayed consistent on is that I got into those relationships with a blunt sense of "I like you, do you like me back and if so let's start dating. You are mine and I am all yours. And if you don't want an exclusive relationship tell me exact what you want or else I will lose interest in you." If you don't give me the answer of your feelings about me then...what are we even doing right now? Anyways moving on...

Gemini Venus

Now I have both dated and been friends with Gemini Venuses. I love air placements like my only problem I usually have with them is that sometimes they will allow people invade their space (but I don't know if that has to do with other placements so yeah) I have told some people off for my Gemini Venus friends because one time my friend seemed so fucking stressed with someone so naturally I got a little impulsive. I think I am just proud of myself for not fighting them. Yes that is something to be proud of because honestly I don't wanna fight people. I might get a little carried away with it.

Leo Venus

Imma keep this one short...as a Leo rising and basically a fire dominant person. I love most if not all Leo placements. Leo suns are my only exception and that depends on the moon sign of the person. I wonder sometimes if I have problems with every Leo sun Taurus moon with a Virgo mercury or if it was just a coincidence that two different people have those placements and I wanted to fight and cut them out of my life...

Virgo Venus

I love Virgo Venus like it might be my Virgo moon and sometimes I get a conjunction with a Virgo Venus but ehh. Virgo Venus just tend to be people who don't think they are enough as a person for other people to like them so they will do stuff for you when they really care about you. And when I mean do stuff for you it's more like they will do stuff for others because they might believe they can't rely on others and/or for validation and love from others, but when they love someone they are doing stuff (for love and validation probably still) out of a way to give back to what you have done for them even if you feel like you haven't really done much of anything. For instance, they made you dinner because you gave them toast before they left for work in the morning. It's a odd thing sometimes bruh anyways moving on.

Libra Venus

A libra placement that is all about harmony and balance shocking I know. Anyway I feel like some people assume libra is non-confrontational like Pisces or cancer. Like bruh water signs are just passive and/or non-confrontational because of their possible mommy issues. Libra and Aries are sister signs, and have you met sisters where one is completely submissive and the other is completely aggressive. I like to think of Libra as non-confrontational like Gemini, Aquarius, and Taurus combined. Libras will try to keep up a nice face like the air sign that they are because realistically they try to keep a little bit detachment when it comes to conflict. But they rule Venus like Taurus does...and as someone who has a good amount of Taurus family and friends. Are Taurus seen as non-aggressive? Libra is avoiding conflict because they know it isn't worth it because unlike my Aries ass, they know how much they affect people with their actions and words. Anyways take that energy to a relationship and it isn't too bad unless their Venus is badly aspected and/or other placements in their chart in something like maybe Scorpio or Capricorn (especially moon). Because bruh then they become far more passive aggressive or stubborn about shit bruh...just from my experience Scorpio and Capricorn have issues with conflict from a more emotional standpoint.

Anyways that's all I have for now. Sorry if this seemed a bit random but honestly it's just how I talk most times. Especially by myself because oof bruh

[hardly-a-p3rson]

BROTHER I ALMOST GOT KIDNAPPED RIGHT AFTER WE SPOKE ABOUT HOW SHIT LONDONERS ARE WHAT ARE THE ODDS

WAIT DEADASS???? IMMA COME FIGHT THEM FOR YOU HOLD ON THATS FUCKING CRAZY

[bitchkay]

"If I was the court of darkness mc" usually ends with something dissing the mc which I will 9/10 agree with

But let's be real, if I was the mc, if I was actually in that world, in Saligia, in her situation

I either wouldn't take shit seriously, be mentally unstable or a menace to society--

Nah cus you drop me --ploop-- into this new ass world and the first people I see are these mfs, half of them wearing mediocre ass outfits (we're NOT gonna talk about Roy's sleaves-- LYNTS BOOTS- 🤭) and they on my ass bout "who are you", "where you from" WHO ARE YOU⁉️⁉️

Nah yall out here tryna kiss me when I don't even know yall names I'M SWINGING‼SWINGING- FUCK ALL YALL FR--

But on the flip side, imagine I just wake up, don't know where I am, scared cus I don't know where I am, and I'm just approached by literal strangers asking me what's my name, where am I from, how'd I get here, imma start crying- NAH CUS- I'm already confused, more then just lost, literally been transported to a place I know nothing about, and yall crowding me??? trying to interrogate me??? Please back up. No I'm being so serious cus the situation is already an overwhelming one, being an anomaly in a place I'm foreign to, the feeling of being lost, not knowing shit or why it happened, just confused on all levels, and while my mind is already scrabbling cus I was literally transported to another realm yall gonna come up to me like I'm not already having a crisis and start asking me questions??? I will literally have a mental breakdown right then and there. Deadass.

However😏

Shit the mc was like 'this has to he a dream cus ain't no way' imma be like 'bet this a dream? Imma fuck shit up😈' even after confirmation that it isn't a dream imma still act up I'm surrounded by hot guys and pussy tight pussy clean pussy fresh-- the princes fangirls?? I'm either fighting them or entertained like damn I did that, what I do next, I'd have sex with Fenn almost right off the bat just to see what the hype is about, I mean yall bitches so cock drunk over this man you think I wouldn't wanna know why, lemme see what yall talking about, I'D FUCK WITH GUY SO HARD, I talk back. Plain and simple, if he rude imma be rude back, I REFUSE TO SUBMIT, if guy pisses me off one too many times, I'm swinging, prince or not, I'll kick in his testicles, I'd teach Rio curse words and how to use them, I'd take this opportunity to begin my hoe era, no ones safe😈😈

[jujuspams]

Koga

This here is Koga “You gone be my woman today”

Also known as Koga “I don’t give a damn if you got a man. Tell that nigga I want all the smoke

He honestly reminds me of a fuck boy just a bit

I mean nobody has Miroku the fuckboy beat

That nigga was known for trying to holla at everybody, but at least he had a reason

FUCKING LOOK AT HIM

Let me suck ya dick

I mean you gone have to wash that bitch first but hey

I’m ready to have some half wolf babies

Bitch just call me mama wolf in this bitch

Ohhh lord I’m ready

I wanted Inuyasha to have the energy that Koga had

Like my nigga if you don’t stop thirstin after a dead bitch

He acted like it was so hard for him to choose

Oh, ok now it’s all fun and games until Kagome hops on the wolf penis

He gone be looking really stupid then

I hated that he only seemed to show his feelings when Koga wanted a piece

Like noo playboy keep that same energy

I'll be strong for you daddy Koga!!!

Please just give me one chance

You can't tell me this man wont worship the ground I walk on

I just know he'll make sure I have everything i could ever need

I could get lost in those ocean blue eyes

Kagome don't know what to do with that

Like girl these men are trash nowadays you better hop on that

Young me just did not get what was so hard

Like this man clearly has some strong as feelings for you and you want the one that's hung up on his ex

But I can't lie I got friends like that and imma stick beside them cause they my girls

If you see this girl let that trash ass man go sis, he is messing up yo ph. balance

And let's not forget my boy was not scared to fight for some love

he stayed running the fade with Inuyasha

Koga the type of dude that when you tell him you got a man, he tells you to go get that nigga

like sir what

and they stayed calling each other slurs like Koga why are you calling this man a mutt

Like the beef was always on sight

My girl Kagome had them fighting over the pussy

that is until Kikiyo came around then she's on her own

And we not finna sit here and act like Koga wasn't feeding Inuyasha them feet

hit him with a swift kick to the chin

Hit his ass with that sweet chin music

Yall heard it here first if a man ever does this to me im folding like freshly dried laudry

im sorry baby i still love you

but this right here does something to me

Like yea it gets the waters rolling but it also gives that little girl from middle school the romance she always wanted

like look me in the eyes and tell me what you love about me and why you would never leave me

like pls i desevre it

everybody deserves something like this

Koga never had a problem with telling Kagome that he loved her

i honestly think thats what i love so much about his chareter

like yea he was cute and all that, but i really just enjoyed how open he was with his feelings

Now that we passed that babydaddy

HARPO WHO IS THIS WOMAN

like what do you mean you got a whole wife out here

and you just acting like my girl Ayame don`t exist

I was confused as hell when she stepped on the scene

I was like now wait a damn minute sis I called dibs first

like we can be sister wives, but just know I'm the one in charge

like Koga deadass treated her like she was a redheaded stepchild

my boy said no face no case

I was like nobody is safe, all of these men are trash

like God the men you are giving us suck, like can you drop a new update or something please

just when you think you got a good one, here come the wife from the woodworks

like bitch where were you earlier when he was pouring his heart6 out

I then fell for him now bitch, now we gotta share him

I can truthfully say that Koga is the reason that I would fuck a werewolf now

yea I said it, I would 100% without a doubt throw it back for a werewolf call me what you want but a coward isn't one of them

And I'm not talking about some oh maybe if there weren't any other choices no, they the first choice

Look at Kagome yawl see how happy she looks

she loves it over there

I bet he gives good hugs

But in all seriousness, I probably would have folded for Koga

Seeing as how Sesshomaru and I aren't talking anymore

Raggedy bitch

I feel like yea he's a safe choice because I know he'll love me unconditionally but it's nothing wrong with that

I don't always want somebody that I have to fight for

So that's how I feel about my boy Koga

And oh my goodness it's been so long since I've done one of these

Like I almost forgot how I use to do these

But you can never forget the thirst that is forever

You always end up coming back to your roots

And besides I missed y'all

But imma end it there if it's any mistakes I'll just come back and fix them

But it's like 12 in the morning and i just got the sudden urge to do this

But Imma head out ya'll stay thirsty my hoes

[zerobaseonefics]

hii back with another fun question.

bp trainee/zb1 member you'd:

1. trust to break you out of prison (not bailing you out)

2. start a rebellion to overthrow the govt with (they're your second in command)

3. sacrifice to save yourself from a zombie

🐻

you don't understand how i'm the right person for these questions and imma tell you why 😼

1. i always lived in neighborhoods where... well, many ppl go to jail 💀 i don't know how to call it in english, in french we call it "cités'' and it's like low cost housing estate for ppl who are from lower classes, and we're mostly immigrants. when i was a kid, i always thought that was just a random experience every people on the block was gonna live once JDJSJJZJA so i was making plan for when i'll grow older and go to prison deadass 💀 I WAS BORN READY FOR THIS QUESTION

a small woman with a pony tail once said "whoever said money cant solve your problem must not have enough money to solve them'' and i stand by that rich ppl can do whatever THAT'S WHY I'M SAYING RICKY HE'D PAY FOR PPL TO HELP ME OUT OR MAYBE BREAK THE WALL AND ESCAPE WITH ME IN A HELICOPTER ‼️

2. i hate emmanuel macron ofc i wanna overthrow the government and i will do it with takuto 🤭 i know what you're thinking "he's a kid!!!!" HEAR ME OUT HE IS A MENACE. WE SHOULD NOT TRUST STILL WATERS HE CHOKED PHANBIN ONCE

that's right, they would never suspect a child.... might also call gunwook he just smart smart and he was in a debate club so he'll probably help us gain ppl to fight with us in the revolution!!

3. i didn't watch 11 seasons of twd in vain i'm praying for a zombie apocalypse actually. now who i'd sacrifice to save myself..... honestly whoever i'll say sung hanbin cuz mf is getting on my nerves 🤠 NO FR THO i'd sacrifice someone clumsy like someone who's just gonna be a pain in my ass if i want to survive.... yeah i'm sorry taerae i'm sacrificing you you'd be a prettier zombie than i ever would

i'm pretty sure i'm right about everything but i'm still open to debate ^-^

[bananaapplewaffle]

Archon Quest: Chapter III: Acts III and IV: Dreams, Emptiness, Deception and King Deshret and the Three Magi

Not having the same issue as last time and starting this in a doc as well as having my laptop on its charger! 

Let’s go, Travelers!

She said like a liar. She had to finish Tignarhi’s quest first. 

AAA ALL THE QUESTS ARE STARTING 

I HAD THREE QUESTS WITH KATHERYNE AND ALL THREE OF THEM STARTED BACK TO BACK

Wait so if we cure the root of the Writhing 

Then we can save both Dunyazard and Collie?

Jasper from Tignhari’s quest just made me feel like I had a stroke good god

HELP I GOT LOCKED OUT OF TIGNARHI’S QUEST BECAUSE NAHIDA IS KATHERYNE RN

Bro I deadass want to write rn wtf is wrong with me lol

Like the Dear Mammon ‘21 doc is open and the YT tab

Just waiting for me to start going

Divine my prospects in love

GIRL NO NOT THE HAREM 

HE FELL FROM A ROOF AND JUST BROKE HIS LEG

Wait no not that important

Who the hell is this? Akim sounds

IS THAT FUCKING TODD HABERKORN???

Is that not literally what Nahida said, Paimon?

Setaria is really pretty 

I really love her voice

Damn she’s suspicious as hell.

We just talking about this shit in the open

Akasha on

Nahida please I need Kathryne

Aw shit

It's about to go down

BITCH THE LOCKED TELEPORTING 

THE HOES

Missed some dialogue

OH SHIT

A CUTSCENE

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I SCREAMED FORREAL

ITS FUCKING HIM

DOTTORE

I SCARED MY DOG

They really just let that man come back in here

Anyway!

Lisa slide through

Sidebar: Kathryne for one of my World Quests is available, but not for Tighnari’s quest. Also Tighnari who is currently in a domain is now available. 

BRO AND NOW THEY’RE SAYING KATHRYNE IS BUSY WHAT THE FUCK

OOOOO THE WORLD QUEST WAS TO UNLOCK SUMERU COMMISSIONS 

OMG 

IT WAS HIM

IM SCREENSHOTTED THE FUCK UP

NO ONE TOUCH ME

FUTURE SCARA MAINS ONLY

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ANOTHER CUTSCENE

PERIODT LUMINE FUCK’EM UP 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I AM NOW SHE?????????

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOWING AWNNNNNNNNN

Okay

I’m fine

Tighnari’s just standing to the side and piecing it all together while we stand here and devise. 

Imma be real

Scara needs to have a moment with someone. 

Whether it be Venti or Ei, I need some tear jerking dialogue. 

WE’RE GOING TO THE DESERT 

I LIED I'M FINISHING TIGHNARI’S QUEST PLEASE HOLD

LITERALLY JUST TWO CONVERSTATIONS

BACK TO THE MAIN QUEST 

???????

What the hell are you doing here, Alhaitham?

ANOTHER CUTSCENE

AW SHIT

ITS CYNO

AW GIRL THOUGHT WE WAS BOUT TO HAVE A BOSS FIGHT

Pause

This close up on Alhaitham’s chest

That green bit looks like its in his skin and not like a necklace or something

Interesting.

DEHYA MY WIFE

CANDACE IN THE DISTANCE 

SHE SOUNDS SO BEAUTIFUL 

WHAT

Cyno stop being so dramatic

And this is where Act 4 begins!

:)

I’m losing the will to concentrate on this

So! I’m moving on to writing and will be back on this tomorrow!

And we’re back.

I did not do much writing lol

Did catch back up with Eaternal Nocturnal and Suitor Armor tho lol

(FORGOT ABOUT HOMESICK LOL)

The girls were sharing a moment

Love to see it

Yeah where the hell did he go

OH SO YOU’RE LISTENING IN EH

JUST STANDING

The Wall of Samiel got me like

:/

Oh baby its a trap

NOT THE TUMBLE WEED

Dehya depending on where they slot you I might pull for you.

Am I done? 

No I just wait until tomorrow

Welp! Let’s get to unlocking waypoints!

Eavesdrops

Candace I apologize for not pulling for you now. 

I will wish for you every standard/character pull after I get Scara and Albedo.

What if I told you

I was back

Back again

Wow, Dehya basically saying: 

Reasons Why You Should Pull For Candace

OH!

While I was exploring I learned that you can shoot the Ajilenakh Nuts from the trees!

O-oh…okay, Cyno

Shout out to Engur’s Eng VA for this line in particular. 

Girl I either just got chills from it being so cold

Or from Candace

Oh good heavens!

Violence

Oh look who it is

If we’re not a team—why am I wasting my time talking to you?

An old hospital?

Y’all already know what’s going down

WAIT

IT'S THAT HOSPITAL

Bitch

THIS MAN READING A PHYSICS BOOK

Uh oh

Not us having a little heart to heart with Paimon

HOW THE HELL DID WE NOT SEE THAT OBVIOUS CELLAR

That blanked out name could possibly be 

Checks webcomic 

I THINK IT STOPPED RIGHT BEFORE WE LEARNED WHO IT WAS

Ah we got that Scarlet Nexus pussy now

Looks like this was written by Dottore

YEP

The achievement basically confirms it

Mister sir man with his Aksha still on

Damn got by a damn AI

Dehya?

WHERE IS EVERYONE GOING

FUCK THIS IS WHY WE DON’T BRING THE CHILDREN

DAMN

GET HER ASS, DEHYA

Ion man I just saw the moon set and the sun rise in this one cutscene alone. 

Bro everyone is just acting

OH GOD

WE OFFERING LIVES AND LIMBS

GIRL WHAT

Well that was dramatic for no reason.

Finally releasing Candace from the Aaru Village Catacombs

Oh we’re going behind the big pyramid

ANOTHER CUTSCENE

DEHYA IN ACTION 

NAHIDA IN ACTION 

Everything in Sumeru is underground

Its needs a whole secondary map

Cyno is like CoM Rikuc I swear

GIRL WHAT

OH GIRL HERE COMES ANOTHER BIG ONE

The Greater Lord is beautiful 

And there’s the big reveal I was spoiled on lol

The truth.

They were never enemies.

Of course Cyno would feel some type of way.

So Candace never came

Stuck in the catacombs

And Isak and his grandpa are just gone.

Oh! I like Judar’s voice!

Just busting it wide open

The Sages have a whole god full of knowledge 

And yet they’re trying to stuff Scara with knowledge instead

Mans literally wants to kill y’all but continue I guess

The next time? 

Then I will see y’all in about a month.

I have a Mondstat Festival to get to

Toodeloo! 

[eottoghe]

Little Boxes - Eleven

A Jeonghceol Domestic AU where they live in suburbia with their six year old son Chan. Jeonghan is an active member of the PTA, a soccer dad and chauffeur, and a supportive parent all around. His loving husband cares deeply for his passions and will follow him to the end of the world if it keeps him and his family happy. Follow their journey as they get caught up in fun and zany adventures when they fall outside of the guide lines of your average neighbor. Don’t really know where I’m going with this, but I want to see how many different domestic prompts I can get out of this AU before I run out of steam.

First Chapter

Previous Chapter

NOTE: This takes place before all the holiday stuff. I just can’t plan for shit and write too slow lmao.

Autumn begins to settle in quickly. Warm sunshine accompanies a light breeze. The leaves start to change color and ever so slightly dangle from their branches, ready to fall. It’s sweater weather and warm tea time, but not quite cool enough for fluffy coats and mittens yet. With the sky being so clear and the temperature being just right, Jeonghan decides to take Chan to the park. Other parents in the surrounding area have noticed the scenic day and have brought their own kids to the playground as well. It’s relatively full. Not too much so that he couldn’t easily keep an eye on his kid, but enough to where the other kids could keep Chan company. Once too many has Jeonghan gotten stuck on a slide because Chan just insists on racing with him. He watches from the sidelines and lets him be a rowdy six-year-old for once.

Of course, it doesn’t take long for Jeonghan to garner some unwanted attention, so he puts on a fake smile to greet a parent that frequents this area. She’s rather distracting and he couldn’t remember her name if he tried, but she doesn’t seem to notice. He doubts she even realizes how annoying she is. Or if she does, she probably finds it charming. Apparently, she is in the PTA too but is a little more reserved so maybe that’s why he doesn’t remember her. He cuts his eyes between her and Chan (they call him overprotective, but he says its just diligence). She mentions something about saving pictures in her phone about some hot dad from the bake sale. Before Jeonghan can effectively pry into her gallery, he hears a shout that sounds all too familiar.

His heart stops, stomach drops, and he hurriedly hops over some children just to get to the source of that scream. He starts panicking once he sees his son on the ground in front of the swing sets. He’s got a skinned-up knee and a bloody palm and his crying echoes through the park achingly. Jeonghan runs over and immediately picks up the boy, checking his face for any life-threatening injuries. He sighs when he sees none. A flurry of questions and hushes come out of Jeonghan, instantly soothing the boy.

“What’s wrong baby? What happened?” He’s bouncing Chan on his hip and through broken cries and hiccupping he hears him say something about a girl pushing him. He connects the dots and sees some long-haired child around his kid’s age swinging merrily back and forth. Once Chan sees her again, he begins to cry more, burying his snot covered nose into Jeonghan’s shoulder. The dad knows he should just take the younger home to get him all cleaned up, but not before giving this brat a piece of his mind.

“Excuse me. Can I speak to you for a moment, sweetie?” It’s clear Jeonghan is a bit upset but tries to keep a calm demeanor so as not to trigger the parent that is sure to be lurking. If they are not monitoring their child like they should be, he’ll take that step for them. If they won’t discipline them, he will. A good scolding is necessary otherwise they’ll never learn. The girl continues to swing but does at least look at him with a bored expression. Kids can be so rude these days. “Now I know you probably didn’t mean it...” Even though Jeonghan knows damn well she is old enough to know better, “ …but it’s not nice to shove others aside to get what you want. Pushing someone off a swing is unacceptable behavior.” She has the nerve to yawn, “I’m sure you wouldn’t want your mom or dad to know what you’ve been up to, but I think it’s best if I talk to one of them.”

Before Jeonghan can even ask for the kid to point out their parent, he hears a vicious voice bark out, “Why are you harassing my daughter?"

Jeonghan is so offended because he’s not the one doing the harassing! “Harrassing?” he begins to tell them off, but when he turns around, it’s like the whole world comes to a full, screeching halt. Fate is on some fuckshit today.

 Jang Doyoon. Age 28. Number 19 on Jeonghan’s hit list.

Don’t be fooled. Just because he’s 19, does not mean there’s any less of a loathing for him. In fact, Jeonghan’s list is quite long so he’s still somewhere around the top 20%. It’s just Jeonghan’s luck that he runs into him after so long. It’s a small world (and at this moment he wishes he was on the opposite side of it).

Once, long before, Jang Doyoon seemed hellbent on ruining his whole life. He’d transferred to the same university as him and maybe it was some kind of territorial defense mechanism that had Doyoon making every encounter absolutely terrible. Jeonghan almost fought him once the other “accidentally” bumped into him with a freshly brewed cup of coffee in his hands. Even more, he didn’t even say sorry after staining his blouse and causing minor burns. Oddly, Jang Doyoon vanished after that. Jeonghan never questioned it, just closed that chapter in his book. Jeonghan hadn’t thought anything else of the boy.

That is… until now.

The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree. He mentally rolls up his sleeves, pulls up his big boy pants and prepares to stand up to the bully he never had the chance to.

“When my son was using the swing, your kid pushed him off.” His tone remains polite yet challenging. Jeonghan is a cordial man with a short temper. His soft exterior shields unsuspecting people from his true wrath.

But Jang Doyoon has accepted the challenge. “Well did she have reason to do so?”

Jeonghan is like a cauldron of molten lava now. His brain stutters, not believing the audacity this man has to ask a question like that. “What did you just say?” He raises an eyebrow.

“If your kid is hogging the swings, don’t you think it’s only fair to take turns?” Jeonghan can tell his cattiness has remained intact all these years later.

“I guess delinquency runs in the family.” Jeonghan leans in real close and his voice gets real low. “If you or your spawn of Satan ever comes anywhere near my child again, I will personally hand your ass over to you on a silver platter.”

Jeonghan makes sure he has a firm grip on Chan, the six-year-old still clinging tightly in his hold. He makes a dramatic exit, not once glancing back at the man who triggered his inner Mama Bear. There’s a cloud of dust in his wake and a couple stunned parents fishing for new gossip. If Jeonghan were to retell the story, be sure to expect explosions in the background, fire—lots of it, and a man quaking in fear.

On the walk home, he’s speaking sweet words to the child easily winding him down. Chan’s still shaken up, never really having been the focus of a bully’s rampage. His bawling has now turned into slight sniffling. He’s just too kind for this world. Jeonghan feels awful that someone so mean could target his precious baby. He hopes Chan never has to see her again (and that he never has to see her father).

He sits Chan on the counter of his bathroom once they get home. Chan knows how it feels to get cuts cleaned. It makes him want to cry all over again at the memory of it. It was too similar to his bike accident a few months ago. He never wanted to go through that again, but here he is. His dad reaches toward him with a cotton ball. He knows it isn’t water soaked through it because water doesn’t burn. And the smell is never that strong. He flinches each time it gets closer.

“I need you to be still, baby. It’ll take longer to clean if you keep moving around.”

“But it huuurts…” The pout is so much like Seungcheol’s that Jeonghan has to refrain from rolling his eyes.

“I know. I know. But it’s the only way to make it better. Can you be a big boy for me?” That seems to do the trick as Chan stops fidgeting on the counter and sits up a little straighter. His eyebrows flatten out into a line as he mocks what he thinks determination should look like. He’s already cried so much today. He wants to be a big boy who doesn’t have a fit when the stinging, burning water like thing gets too close. He nods.

But the contact makes all of that go out the window. He yelps and kicks his leg in surprise. His pout has returned and his wide eyes swell with brimmed tears. Thankfully Jeonghan catches his leg before he gets kicked. Holding it in place, he dabs the wounds a few times and fully cleans up any remnants of pebbles and blood. Even when Chan starts crying again and trying to shy away, he holds fast and tries not to let it affect him as much. It’s hard though. Seeing Chan cry and knowing he’s the one causing the pain makes his own heart wrench. He feels so guilty that he wasn’t able to protect his baby in the first place.

“I’m almost done. I’m so so sorry.” Jeonghan croons. The six-year-old’s fists come to tighten in the collar of Jeonghan’s shirt, an attempt to distract himself.

Jeonghan finishes up with Spiderman decorated band-aids. It’s the only good thing of this whole ordeal because Chan finally smiles seeing one of his favorite superheroes. They don’t have any plans for the rest of their day so Jeonghan thinks it’s a perfect time to watch cartoons and let Chan eat snacks and ice cream before dinner for once.

Next Chapter

[epithmia-moved]

@battlethrill​ :       ✿     [ 𝙿𝚁𝙴 - 𝙴𝚂𝚃 𝚁𝙴𝙻𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂𝙷𝙸𝙿 ]

FRIENDSHIP.     childhood friends  /  work buddies or coworkers  /  family friends  /  friends with benefits  /  smoking buddies  /  adventure buddies  /  fake friends  /  recently friends  /  party buddies  /  friendship of need  /  dying friendship  /  circumstantial friendship  /  partners in crime  /  old friendship  /  [ your muse ] is the good influence  /  [ your muse ] is the bad influence  /  [ my muse ] is the good influence  /  [ my muse ] is the bad influence  /  opposites attract  /  ride or die  /  frenemies  /  roommates or flatmates  /  penpals  /  exes to friends  /  enemies to friends  /  other

ROMANCE.     childhood sweethearts  /  [ your muse is mines ] childhood crush  /  [ my muse is yours ] childhood crush  /  exes  /  exes to lovers  /  forbidden lovers  /  highschool sweethearts  /  secret relationship  /  opposites attract  /  long distance  /  unrequited [ from your muses side ]  /  unrequited [ from my muses side ]  /  unrequited [ from both sides ]  /  skinny love  /  friends to lovers  /  enemies to lovers  /  spurious relationship  /  power couple  /  newly entered  /  soulmates [ metaphorical ]  /  soulmates  [ literal ]  /  awkward  /  turning toxic  /  toxic love  /  cheating [ on your muse ]  /  cheating [ with your muse ]  /  other

FAMILIAL.     siblings [ half ]  /  siblings [ step ]  /  [ my muse ] is an older sibling figure to your younger sibling figure  /  [ my muse ] is a younger sibling figure to your older sibling figure muse  /  [ my muse ] is a parental figure to yours  /  [ my muse ] is a child figure to your muse  /  guardian figure  /  legal guardian  /  adoptive child  /  foster child  /  [ your muse ] is taken under mines wing  /  [ my muse ] is taken under yours wing  /  other

ANTAGONISTIC.     dangerous to each other  /  dangerous to others  /  unpredictable  /  rivals  /  petty  /  developing into sexual or romantic tension  /  based off family matters  /  based of off circumstance  /  based of professional matters  /  based off misunderstanding or lies  /  conflict of ideology  /  betrayal  /  hero - villain dynamic  /  enemies  /  fight club  /  friends turned enemies  /  lovers turned enemies  /  exes turned enemies  /  other

[riotlain]

Jason Voorhees, Michael Myers, Brahms, Vincent Sinclair, and Bo Sinclair, Thomas Hewitt, and Bubba Sawyer with someone who can have visions about the next victim how they will fight, how they try and run away, and the exact time they come?

i added jesse bc i love him

! only did 4/8 so imma do a part 2 later

Fem aligned readers dni

Jason Voorhees

You were a chill person to Jason

Which is why it scared him when you stated how a group is gonna come by and you state what each of them will do

He thinks youre joking at first

“Then a blonde girl will tryin to hide in here.” You say calmly.

Jason just stares at you like “Deadass? fr? just like that?”

He looks at his mom and Pam was also confused.

Then when he was looking for a girl he remembered what you said. In the cabin.

He goes to the cabin to see the girl tugging on your arm trying to keep you inside.

“Goood…” you groaned as the girl tugged you more. “Please we have to get out of here!” She cried before Jason slashed her

You just stared at him blankly.

“So… What took you so long?” You joked

Jason learned to start listening to you when you start talking about a victim

“Damn Jason this guy is gonna give you quite a problem today.”

Michael Myers

He never listened at first

Your little oddly specific things about his victims never gets in his head

How would you know about that? Hes the one who stalks people

At first !t was small stuff

“The guy will probably try to punch you.”

So what? !Ts just a guess

Every guy tries to attack The Michael Myers

Then !t was more specific

“The girl with blonde hair !s gonna hide and try to strike you with a fire hydrant.”

What??? Well !t happen and now its stuck in his head for a while

He started just standing in front of you for a bit before he goes out

He wants you to say something interesting

But !t comes off as just him standing there like usual

“What do you want Michael?”

You eventually get what he wants and have to explain how you can’t do it all will yet

He just walks away and goes killing

He doesnt need your little advice hes fine

No he isnt

Please help him out

Brahms Heelshire

Mf what??

He didnt believe you at first

You knew he was !n the walls? You must’ve caught his hints

Malcom will be late today? Well !ts a bit cloudy so it’ll probably rain.. makes sense

A guy is gonna break in today so be ready?? Are you ok?

He’s pretty skeptical until that night he sees you with him !n the walls

You had yet to come !n the walls with him so th!s surprised him

“Why are you in here?”

“Remember what I said earlier about a break in? Should be around this time..”

As if on queue a window broke and Brahms was startled

He ran through the house and killed the guy

Now hes gonna bother you about it

“Are you having a vision? What are they about? Am in it?”

God you better be prepared for a never ending stream of questions

Vincent Sinclair

You’ve been together for a while and he started picking up on the small things you do

Like Drawing someone that ends up being a victim

You knowing how victims will attack or where theyre hiding

So one day he asked you about it

“Oh I have these like… visions where I can see the victims that’ll come.”

You explained it nonchalantly

He was… pretty confused

Like you fr 😨???

He gave you a sketchbook so you can draw them and show !t to him

He also shows your drawing of victims to Bo and Lester

You have to also tell Bo and Lester whats gonna happen

Lester will probably be the most chatty of the 3 and will ask alot of questions

Vincent or Bo will have to make him get back to his work !f you get overwhelmed by the questions though

Jesse Cromeans/ Chromeskull

He was always intrigued by your abilities

All the time before he went to “work” he would either ask you what this one will do

Or you just come along with him

“Careful Jess, this one is a kicker.”

He never lets you by his victims, that did happen once though

It was before he really grasped your visions

He just thought it was you guessing

You told him how one will run to the car and try to get out

So when he was working and you were in the car it did infact happen

He walked out to see you struggling with the victim

You managed to stab her with a pocket knife Jesse gave you

And then Jesse finished it

He started listening after that incident

[bluewinnerangel]

Did you do a predictions list for lt2?? Do i need to scroll down a bit? I loved reading your list for hs3 haha

Didn't yet but now I've slowly been adding to this list. Again I'm just having some fun here and none of this is very serious, but here it is, my LT2 predictions:

Still a lack of pronouns

But loads from a "we"/"us" perspective

Insecurities. Not necessarily about him being insecure, but a song processing and looking at insecurities and uncertainties in a broader sense, very DLIBYH-like.

Return of the (little) black dress

A diss track. Things or people being fake, but not like Fearless, more.. punk? More punk.

“Moon”

Just having a pint with the lads

hella obvious queer anthem. And I mean obvious level: ripped off some pride flyer.

Some fking hippie ass flowery love and peace man dude just relaaaaxxx everything's gonna be fiiineeee bro peace on earth song, which he'll be trying to mask it with some heavier sounds but yeah no lyrics are what they are and they're not hiding from us man we see your make love, not war bs babe keep going

Something about not being seen. Easily applicable to covid isolation times.

"Darling", "love".

One song of which none of his fans, no matter what we think we know about what he's like, what his life is like, what he's about, etc, can figure out. I mean, not even the subject. No clue. Many wildly different interpretations follow and somewhat of a common consensus will arise per corner of his fandom followed by a bunch of "unpopular opinions" and "no but I figured it out"'s and none of them will be right and this mfer will just be crackling in a corner somewhere.

Still being a kid at heart (there's Change already so is that even a prediction I guess not)

Ok fine one sappy love song. Romantic lil shit settled ridiculous us against the world kinda forever we're a team everyone else can fuck off you and me you and me baby you and me byeeee.

Water splashy sound goes splash splash

"love is a drug" analogies, or at the very least a bunch of lines that seem pro substance use.

I think he's still gonna play it safe but lemme dream so much more raw sounds. Unpolished all the way.

And combining the previous 2: something that sounds a LOT like The Beatles' Tomorrow Never Knows.

And another one like George Harrison's What Is Life (both lyrically and sonically but with a ✨modern twist✨)

Ok third gamble add Paolo Nutini's Iron Sky as well.

Oh look up at the stars my boy they shine

"This is who we are and together we stand strong" and like idk if is this about your relationship, artists fighting for their rights, the LGBTQ community, your fanbase, or your football club, but imma take it with both hands and cherish it.

ANGER. Just gimme the damn anger Louis pour it out into music please god just. do it.

One that's just fucking clownmusic istg just straight out of Yellow Submarine

Clear continuation of a song on LT1 by reusing a line or a play on it from that song in a new one, that will have the same theme and vibe.

One or more songs that are obviously not a direct response to any songs on FL nope nah most definitely not.

But also one song that responds to NIL bro deadass cut the cameras

"Faith In The Future" will be a line in one of his songs, one that may or may not entirely parallel John Lennon's Mind Games.

something that can be translated to we’re both just little shits really (yeah LT2 can have some of that as well)

"Reflect(ions)", "Mirror"

you're my baby such a good girl/boy. Let's just say it's for Clifford and move on.

H O M E. Always home, away from home, finally never home, home again, home is whenever I'm with you, always in my homey heart. So many options.

Official or alternate album cover (like special edition vinyl or whatever) being the most cryptic ass illuminatispiracy looking assholery? Just? wtf am I looking at? What even is that??? Just get out? Go away? fuck off louis but keep going

And/or some black and white album art / promo shoot / etc.. you know what happened with one of the pieces of fan art used as Spotify backgrounds on the 1yr anniversary of walls, where the art had a rainbow on it but it showed up in black and white on his Spotify? That.

A very fucking beautiful, lovely, honest, smart, perfect punch in the feels album imma cry to forever.

HS3 predictions

[socheckitout-mikey]

aaaaa!! i lov ur work sm ,... can u do hc for enjoying colder weather with dallas?

heya birdie! i love dally sm. he's a big shit but he's highkey hilarious dfjsfjs i hope you enjoy these! - mae

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Enjoying Cold Weather with Dallas Winston Hc's:

° Alright imma say it- stiff nip central™ on Dally's side of things asujfsdfghjsdfsj

° He's freaking mean, man! Deadass destroys your ass with snowballs djfjsdfjsd

° But you're no pussy! You hit him straight back!

° Your snowball fights are intense! But if Dally hurts you, he actually feels so bad-

° This one time he whipped a chunk of snow at your face and busted your lips. He ran over to you to wrap you in his arms whilst he tried not to laugh sjfdfjhds he kissed your lips after cleaning them up. he teased you about that for awhile, but all in good fun! he never whipped snow at you again.

° He called you fish lips for the next two weeks

° You kinda play dirty too, like the amount of times you've just shoved snow down the back of his shirt and the absolute SCREAM Dallas let's out- It's magical haha!

° You make the two of you hot chocolate and Dally loves it because you make it the best. Buck's hot chocolate tastes like ass, according to Dally.

° "Where's my candy cane? This thing usually comes with a candy cane."

° "Up your ass, Dal-"

° "What was that you little shit?"

° Y'all go ice skating istg it's actually cute- Dally holds your hands and it's one of the most mushy things you guys do in public.

° Rip to the guy who called you guys a bunch of pansies- Yeah... he doesn't have any teeth left dfdsjfsjfs

° When y'all go on walks and you're alone, he'll take your hands in his, rub them and blow hot air on them. He even let's you put your hands in his pockets it's so wholesome oml :'(

° In private Dally will cuddle up to you, especially when it's cold in his room at Bucks. He literally puts his cold ass feet on your calves and he laughs so evilly wtf

° "DALLAS!"

° "Damn babe, we haven't even gotten to the good stuff yet and you're already screamin' my name! If you keep at it we'll get our asses thrown outta this dump."

° This one time you wanted to make snow angels with Dally. He obliged, but only if you sat on his lap whilst he did one lmaoo

° You always put your cold hands under his shirt and Dallas hates it despite being from New York. He deadass get's so mad about it and won't let you near him till your hands are warm again. You're crying of laughter, chasing him around the house. It always ends up making him crack a grin.

° "Eh, stupid! Quit chasin' me around- I'm tryna stay mad at you!"

° "You do this to me when you wanna grab my ass, Dal. Pay back's a bitch."

° "Try that again and I'm gonna rip your teddy bears head off-"

° "YOU TAKE THAT BACK!"

° Y'all have so much fun istg but the cold makes Dallas even more cranky than usual.

° But lucky for him, he's got you to warm him up!

° Istg I can't believe I actually wrote that... fuck that was super cringe-

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

please like, reblog and follow for more!

requests: closed!

[written-beyond-the-grave]

Elija Mikaelsaon Dating a Black S/O Headcanons

Did anyone ask? No, did I deliver? Yes.

- Alright, so Elijah and the Mikaelson’s have been alive for a while. Never got a specific date, but we have vikings. And as Elijah has been alive for a minute, he’s had flings, situationships, lovers, and at some point out knight in shinning armor was probably a fuck boy… don’t @ me.

- What I’m trying to say is man probably did it all, Asian, Latinx, Caucasian and African American and maybe even African and Caribbean… Maybe even fucked around with his sexuality for a second because he got it like that and the writers were too pussy to put this shit on

- Tbh probably the originals tried all the genders and non-genders, change my mind. But elijah strikes me as a free for all who loves something refreshing that’ll take him out of Klaus’s bullshit for a minute

- But here’s were this shit gets spicey… Elijah… with a black s/o….. Just hear me out poc who been waiting for someone to give them good fucking food on poc x tvd/ the originals, I got y’all… unless college comes back.

- OK so, I feel like if you’re rocking with Elijah he’d dress you up and ice you out because he can. Nothing under $5,000 for his s/o… We talking furs, diamond, real leather, snake skin, hell even a whole ass snake if you wanna be on your Bruce Wayne shit一 better yet, your T’challa shit with a whole ass panther (black panther ain’t real soooo y’all can get a black puma and call that bitch a panther lmfaoooooo)

- He’s asking you to a dinner date and then you say you’re ready…. Wearing pretty little things…. Missguided… honey. (Nah ain’t shit wrong wit those brands, they be having bangers tbh and sales like a bitch) Let him upgrade youuuuuuu. You only wear Givenchy, Yves Saint Laurent, Burberry, Balmain, etc. Try walking out there looking a damn mess and distasteful… just try it sis 

- Speaking of which… my mans got you with hair too! Fuck you mean ?1?! 

- He had a black s/o in the past, even though her hair had loose curls… we won’t discredit her. He has some knowledge on how curl hair works, and if he’s lacking, he as a whole library and might fuck around and ask Bonnie in exchange for some witchy ingrdients (im cdfuuuuuu)

- Name, braids, twists, locs, finger waves. Wanna shave bald??? He’s for it, let him get you his barber. Fuck it, he’ll get you Marcel’s barber. Lined up and all that shit, throw in a fade too

- And coming in for wash day, he’s sitting behind you days in advance helping you take down your hair after a month or two. Grey sweatpants, scissors in hand, spray bottle to the side with Netflix as background music…. Fuck with it. You’re all tired after doing like 8 and he tells you to take it easy, with vamp speed and the deterixty of those fingers…. *chefs kiss*

- He sets up a lil wash day station for you, or if he’s on the clock just books a whole salon for you alone already paid for. But if he’s doing the work, best believe he spent the coinssss COINS for the organic shampoo shit you have the refrigerator and the deep conditioner, AND THE FUCKING LEAVE IN. He’s keeping your shit moisturized in the winter. His big hands and gentle fingers helping detangle your hair, you in a fluffy robe, enjoying being loved on….

- Y’all didn't even get me started on him doing twists… or plaits, or the bantu knots, the concentration on his face

- IDK why I gotta say this… nails done too, he loves the feel of your nails gliding on his scalp and down on his back when he’s giving you those slow strokes. 

- This doesn’t have to do with anything, but the fact that the originals were set in New Orleans which is mostly BLACK BLACK BLACK BLAAACCCKKKKK and I saw like 3 black people in that bitch, ong….. Julie Pleck, you basic bitch

- Anyways, I feel like Elijah in a trench coat coming to pick you up from work would be such a vibe and a mood. Like, he knows when you get off and you might just take public transportation or something to have some sort of independence. But he shows up after work when you’re leaving with some friends from work…. Nigga shows up in a dark blue cadillac, trenchcoat with the collar up, leather gloves… and a fresh cut

- Who tf let him out the house??

- And ik you’re friends trifling too asking who is he, a damn fine tall glass of milké

- And he’s just leaning against the door waiting for you and once he sees you, he waits for you expectedly and kisses your forehead in greeting and gets the door for you

- Speaking of driving, Elijah be too damn serious, and that’s were you come in. 

- I need him and the Miakelson’s at a cookout doing line dancing, the electric slide, cupid shuffle (and give Rebekak some goddamn friends shit, she everyone stay chasing love and shit but have 0 friends and boundaries, they drag family though the mud) 

- Like I need him out his suit and in some dark jeans, a solid white v-neck, rolex on his wrist, and white air forces

- Sitting there, kinda out of place until he settles in. Like I deadass see him asking where the tables are at the cookout and like… you break it to him he’s gonna have to do the table legs for that shit

- And the plastic cutlery! LMFAOOOOO his soul is slightly quaking

- And its finna be a whole ass test when an uncle comes up and grabs him by the shoulder in a greeting and tries to fill in the seat for spades or even worse…. Dominoes…. That’s it. It’s over. Elijah been alive for too long and knows every play in the book and can bluff his ass off

- But if we talking dominoes… we gon have the boondocks animation version of a nigga moments cuz y’all fights will be started, money will be lost…. To Elijah. In the end he gives it back bc he’s a good sport and bc humiliation is a greater victory 

- Lmfaoooo and the quiet drive back, you’re exhausted but the music station is playing throwbacks and Usher’s climax comes on and bitch… the high notes, the lamp posts that give you both a glimpse of each other’s side profiles. And for once Elijah is relaxed and coming down from his amusement. No one is trying to kill him or his siblings, and good food albeit greasy in his stomach.

- Dare he say he felt human for a moment

- You staring out the window and softly singing along enjoying what the day was, Elijah loving the ambiance created. Mmmmmm such a mood

- THAT BEING SAID imagine you and Elijah on a long drive and “I Mean It” by G- Eazy comes on and you start singing along bc data is expensive over long ass drives and being stuck in traffic. And Elijah is giving you a bemused look, you in all your glorious wonder and you just make the lyrics more dramatic ashit trying to be a heartbreaker and all that. But, the true heart breaker is Elijah

- He comes in on the verse and gives you all eye contact, lips completely sync but your can kinda hear his voice keep the tempo…. Bitch this makes me feel some type of way… and as he’s going on he grabs your face and tilts your chin up OOOOUUUU gets up all close and personal and finishes the lyrics which is perfectly timed with when the light turns green and turns back like nothing just happened. There yo are aping like a fish bc tbh if anyone could rap it’d probably be Kol, he’s like the emnemin mixed with busta rhymes type, but tone it down….

- Bitch imma go fantasize rapping Elijah, y’all been slept

- And for those asking yes, I do write for black readers, mor specifically female but I can try male

[chasseuses]

reasons why i love jade leech part 3

I don't know why I'm doing this again I am a big fool goodbye ☠️ but ahhahahwhahjwhsjfhfjfnfkbdsjbdkdbjd im a doormat for him so. haha. I'll just. fukcignvkjgknv everyone pls look away this is the last post i swear 🤩

Part 1, 2

So.... 🤡 Hi I'm back again with another simp post I'm your local Jade simp and I'm here to point out reasons why I'm an absolute doormat for this eel and why I'm staying as one.

I'M FUCKIFNCGD. SCRVEN AMWIANAJWBAJVWKQVWKAGAKAVDKFBYKDGSKEIANSJAMEINSLENDKEBEKSBEKSHEKDJEKSJRKDJRKDHSKDHKEHSKEBSKEJDLDHDKDBDKHRKDBEKSHEKSUSMS

Ok so, URGFKFHDKDUDKSJSKFHDKGDKDHD if you've been here long enough or something i think i posted something about his initial birthday suit up illustration here which i wrote while i was sobbing and being overly emotional over him.

BUT BASICALLY. IT WAS ABOUT HIS SMILE. I MEAN RTHGJKHJGK JADE LEECH..... SMILING.............N N .VJV.JV. WITHOUT ANY ULTERIOR MOTIVES...... IM FUCKFING DEAD YO!!!!!

HEAR ME OUT. I JUST GJVKJGKVNGKV ... dont u think there's just something about someone as shady as jade who looks shady 90% of the time look like he's not shady for the first time ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ

idk if that made sense but yeah.

ALSO IDK IF ANYONE WAS SIMPING HARD ENOUGH TO NOTICE BUT LIKE 😭 IF U COMPARE HIS HANDS TO FLOYD'S THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.

and now if you've known me long enough to know that i am a big fan of his hands, you'll know that i went absolutely crazy over this detail!!!!!! THEY WERE ROUGHER THAN FLOYD'S AND THAT WAS JUSTHGJJGKGKFNKFKGNGKGNFKDDJFKGNGKFJF A DIRECT HIT TO THE GUT WHAT THE FUCK DISPLEX YOU CANT DO THIS TO US 😭😭😭😭😭

do u see the fork he's holding?

yeah

i wanna be that fork so bad

im not even kidding

i legit want to be that fork.

why?

.

haha.

you dont need to know

ANYWAYS. ONTO THE STORY 🥰

we got a lot of lore for the twins this time around and i am tHRIVING :BIBBEK:

"However, and this is unusual for me, but so many people wishing me ‘Happy birthday’ has made me rather embarrassed." HELP?????????&(&!4(£;#(-__8-##(-_(£+£(£ I II I I I I HUCHJWNWISHEJDHWOHSKWGSKSYAKGSKA HI KAUAKSGKAGSKSGSJAYJAGSJAGAJSYSIGSJGSJSHSJAHsks

Their mother!!! Uses!!! -san!!!! At the end of their names!!!!!!! Which got me going 🧐 that is not usual at all!!!!! wtf is going on in the leech household

a lot of ppl theorized mafia stuff and all of that which honestly makes sense imo and also because i find that hella hot HAHSMDGSKDHKSJS mr leech...... 😳 mafia.... HELPGKFJKGJFKF

wait. won't that mean he's rich.

bonus points eyy /j GFJFHFJDHJFNF

"Well, they do say that married couples take after each other… It’s good that they get along well." MR LEECH YOUR HAND IN MARRIAGE RFNJVJKHKGKGKOGJGKVJKFCKIJGKTJKFFJKDHDKXHFFHFJ

guys im losing it

if that wasn't already obvious RHUFHGUF

HELLO????????? ONE OF THE REASONS WHY HE LIKES TERRARIUMS??1?"!"!'! HELPFKVKV CONTROL IT'S CONTROL

"Whether they live or die is also up to me…" i just think.

no i dont think but you get what i mean why the fuck is that line lowkey hot lmfao something is wrong with me

i dont knwo why the fuck but the fact that he likes unpredictability is also kinda????? lmao how boring was ur life that everything u did went exactly your way 😭 how does that bring u amusement i cant relate gomen mr leech

or am i completely wrong idk 🗿 mr leech tell me more about you onegai

Ok honestly, before the birthday card came out, I thought their earrings were like,,, from their parents or something. like heirlooms!! i thought they were precious in that aspect but what i rlly didn't expect is for them to fckinghgkgngknfkf FIGHT A DAMN STURGEON FOR ITS SCALES 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

deadass why would a sturgeon challenge them anyways 🧐 and the twins were just like, "ok sure but can we have your scales if we win" and they rlly did 😭 just how strong were you guys before middle school wtf!!!!

and they turned the scales into earrings 🧐 which is now what they wear!! p cute

they're apparently popular to use as amulets in the coral sea so i. i fucking rotted over this AHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA hrufhfigjofhckfbcjc should i delve deeper into this? no. but perhaps you can find out what my rot is about just by reading this single bullet

"Floyd and I have gone near beaches on nights with fireworks as well." HELEPEHLEPDFKLEGSLDOSODB EGHFKCNDKMCURLDHLDGSMX

WATCHIFNFG FIREOEKSKF WITHHF JADE AJFNJFVJFHKDHF

ohmigod this is getting way longer than intended 🤡 should i continue

yeah fucj it HFJVHFJHCJFHJCJ everybody pls ignore my rot 😌

as all of you know, jade wears purple eyeliner. that's right.

Purple eyeliner.

Why does this matter, you ask? Oh sweet summer child, it may not matter to you but to me—eyeliner is super fucking hot I kid you not I started crying at night when I thought about this and wrote a mini essay about it like a fool so I'm just going to.

I am legitimately losing my shit over this like-?? Who allowed you to fucking put on eyeliner? You're already deadly without them and more so with them.

It honestly makes me wonder if he puts this on his own or not but seeing how deft he is with his hands, it's not a stretch to assume that he puts it on his own.

And I find that really hot since look at those clean strokes..!! He's better at applying them than me. I have this desire to let him do my makeup but when I think about it I start making incomprehensible noises and bury my face into my pillow. Purple eyeliner just-? Looks so good on him?

It should be illegal at this rate he looks so tempting I hate it. Sometimes I just have this urge to ruin in, I don t care how I just want to smudge it for some reason. Like deadass, I just want you all to appreciate how good his eyes look!

HELP HIS EYESDHFHTKHEKFHDKFHDMFHKDHFKSGDK IM FUCKFINDG LSOING IT

WHY DO I LOVE HIS EYES SO MUCH I DONT FUCKING KNOW I'VE NEVER BEEN A FAN OF CHARACTERS WITH MISMATCHED EYES BUT WITH HIM IM JUSTHGJJFJG KG NVM

His eyes are fucking beautiful, man. 🤡💞 Could stare at them for hours and never get tired!!!!

Need I say more?

BRO IM FUVKGIGNVJKGVKNGKFHFKFFJF HIS TEETH IM CRYIGGN WHAT THE ACTUALLY FUCK I KNEW THEY WERE SHARP BUTJGKVJGKGJFKGJCKFJKCFJKFFHKCJFKGJDOFHKDHFKDHDKDHDJ BARKBARKBARKBARK

I mean what 🗿

guys displex is insane because they literally made jade have two ssrs in a row with banners that were available at the same time do you know how painful that was for me

when jamil bday card dropped all i lost ebg because i panicked over the thought of a jade bday card and started saving!!! and i did!!!! i managed to save up 100 pulls and i was so fucking chill after that but then,

abema stream happened

i was asleep when that happened so when i woke up i had like 283628 pings in discord telling me that he has an ssr for the halloween event and i was just 🗿 yo say sike his bday is soon displex must be joking

haha nope! they were dead serious.

that shit was painful i started crying 🤡 what the fuck because i didn't have enough gems for both ssrs and his halloween card was just absolutely beautiful.

so i went insane and saved 200 copies of the same jade card in attempt to make him come home before pity so i dont have to whale

I mean,

Black nails.

The bandages.

The harness.

The hat is kinda ugly but that's ok.

THE BELTS AT HIS WAISTFJTKDJRKFBFKFHOFHDKDHDKSGDKSHSKXHSKJS

SO I WAS REALLY DESPERATE AHHSHDHFJFGHJFJF THANKFULLY THEY BOTH CAME HOME BEFORE PITY SO TYSM JADE I LOVE U FOR THAT AHAHJAHDJ

oh shit this got long so imma just end this here 🐬 if you read this far, congrats HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA