strayheartless · 1 year ago
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Zack: *writes a poem for Cloud and asks Genesis for his opinion*
Genesis:… it’s- …hmmm
Angeal: be nice!
Genesis: I’m finding it.
Angeal: it takes you that long to find it?
Genesis: it does, it does… it’s just-
*proceeds to tear the whole thing apart, rewrite it and then send Zack on his miserable way.*
Angeal: you are a terrible person.
Genesis: I know, it keeps me awake at night.
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verysmolspams · 6 months ago
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Elyse being sensitive about her height (5’3”) because she wants to be seen as capable as the rest of SOLDIER:
Random cadet: hehe you’re short.
Elyse: And you just fell short of your target; try again.
Genesis, dueling with Elyse: I didn’t know they let elves partake in Soldier combat.
Elyse: oh fUCK off, you walking red flag.
Angeal, watching Elyse try to get something from a higher shelf: you sure you don’t want me to hel-
Elyse: Nope, I got it. *proceeds to climb up the shelf and grab it, before climbing back down.*
Angeal: ….
Elyse: What?
Zack: Elyse? What are you doing up there?
Elyse, hiding the box of cookies that Angeal put on top of the fridge: … nothing-
Sephiroth: You silly, tiny mage. *picks her up from the ground with a sigh after she had just set off an explosion in a mission. (She eliminated the target, but not by his original directions).*
Elyse: that’s meeee— oh wait… I’m in trouble, aren’t I?
She wants to be taken more seriously sometimes; she tries her best. 🥺
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aurora-nerin · 2 years ago
Conversation
Genesis, ranting to Angeal on the phone:
Genesis: So and then Sephiroth said he doesn't love me anymore!
Sephiroth in the background: THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID!
Genesis: What did you say then?
Sephiroth: I accidentally misquoted a verse from Loveless!
Genesis: THAT'S THE SAME THING!
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Zack: *leaning on the counter* Hey beautiful, come here often?
Cloud: Is this the part where I remind you we've been married for four years or do I play along?
Zack: Play along!
Cloud: Alright. Sorry, I'm not interested, I'm married.
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rottenpumpkin13 · 1 year ago
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More Final Fantasy VII Memes On My Phone
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preposterousgreen · 1 month ago
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[in front of a crowded cafeteria]
Zack: Cloudy, I can't believe you would betray me like that!
Cloud: What? I have no idea what you're talking about!
Zack: Oh, don't play dumb with me, mister. You were loving on her right in the open, on a damn street corner!
Cloud: W-who? Zack, everyone's staring!
Zack: That gorgeous blonde? With the floofy pants? Give me a break! She was slobbering all over you! Literally!
Cloud:
Cloud:
Cloud: The dog? That golden retriever?!
[minutes later]
Zack: *cackling like a loon in between Cloud trying to drown him in a toilet bowl*
Cloud: You have the worst sense of humor in history.💢
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crisis-core-madness · 1 month ago
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Lazard: That's it, you're grounded! Sephiroth, no adventures for you! Angeal, no fighting for you! Zack, no stealing for you! And Genesis... oh my god, is there anything that you love?
Genesis: Revenge.
Lazard: No vengeance for you.
Genesis: I was going to say "I'll get you for this," but I guess that's off the table.
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darlingzelda · 17 days ago
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sephirthoughts · 6 months ago
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cloud: crushes are the worst. whenever i’m near mine, i start acting stupid
zack: you always act stupid
zack:
zack: wait...
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anakinh · 2 years ago
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endless ffvii → (29/∞): crisis core incorrect quotes edition
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strayheartless · 2 months ago
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Genesis and Zack except it’s that one scene from BG3:
Genesis: WHAT IN THE SWEET HELLS WERE YOU THINKING ACTIVATING THAT SUMMON?! I WAS RIGHT THERE! GODS! Do you have any idea how much that hurt?!
Zack, cringing: sorry! I’ll be more careful next time I swear.
Genesis: Next time? No no no, if there is a “next time” I’ll be the one wielding the almighty weapon, thank you!
*Angeal glared at him*
Genesis, grudgingly: …although I do appreciate you trying to fix your mistake… just don’t do it again.
Zack: I healed you didn’t I?!
Genesis: excuse me? That was the least you could do after dropping a building on me!
Zack, pushing his luck: I thought your fire powers protected you from getting hurt by heat?
Genesis: well, apparently there’s a limit. Somewhere between a nice summers day, and the FULL CONCENTRATED POWER OF IFRIT!! Next time Zackary, at least warn me before you do something stupid. At least then I can get out of the blast radius.
Zack: …I think I liked you better as a pile of smouldering leather…
*Sephiroth pulls Zack back by the scruff of the neck before Genesis strangled him.*
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verysmolspams · 7 months ago
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CC Crackcanon: Vine Edition.
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*Elyse experiences a mako bath for the first time. She’s explaining the story to Zack when someone walks in*
Elyse: so I’m sitting there, mako on my titties-
*Sephiroth walks in at the last sentence*
Sephiroth:
Zack:
Elyse: *trying to play it off*… oh hi Seph-
Zack: *bursts out laughing*
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foreststarflaime · 3 months ago
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ff7 dialogue boxes but I made them do vines pt 2
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Prev part
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*at Vincent's coffin *
Aerith: Hi everyone and welcome to another unboxing video!
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rottenpumpkin13 · 6 days ago
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Out Of Context Shit Heard On The SOLDIER Floor #7
Genesis: SEPHIROTH, STOP MEOWING AT ME.
Kunsel: Any loser twink can be a fem-boy, but it takes a real badass to be a fem-man.
Sephiroth: Did I "yee-haw" with joy, or did it convey depression?
Zack, holding up Cloud: BEHOLD.
Sephiroth, stealing a fry from Angeal's plate: A most generous offering. You will be spared. Angeal: FROM? Sephiroth: You will be spared.
Genesis, wearing sunglasses and holding a cappuccino: So there I was, gelato on my breasts—
Cloud: Aww, that's such a cute Halloween decoration. *pointing at Genesis sobbing in the corner*
Angeal: Who put a hotdog in the candy bowl?? Zack, in the background: Halloweenie.
Sephiroth: I could've sworn "motherfucker" was a compliment.
Angeal: IF YOU EAT THAT WEEK-OLD SUSHI PLATTER, YOUR INTESTINES WILL BECOME RADIOACTIVE.
Sephiroth: Zack, can I enjoy this steak dinner without you explaining A/B/O to me?
Lazard: I think we ALL need to beat our fathers with shovels, Sephiroth, you're not special.
Zack: NO! THAT'S MY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT BANANA!
Genesis: He manspreads to assert dominance, I manspread to create a barrier between myself and heteronormativity. We are not the same.
Sephiroth: I just sent Angeal an email describing my feelings for him. If he doesn't reply, I'll show up at his apartment and superglue myself to the door.
Zack: Give me a pen, paper, and three Adderall, and I'll write something better than Loveless in one hour.
Kunsel: Everyone is subjected to failure, but at least I'm not Roche, who thought the plural of ninja was ninji.
Sephiroth: I have exactly three crayons on my person right now, and they're all stolen from Zack.
Angeal, chewing with his mouth full: Don't make psycho-sexual comments in front of my cheeseburger.
Zack, narrating what he's seeing: 🎶 Look at Angeal 🎶 beating Sephiroth with a frozen chicken because he forgot to take it out the freezer. 🎶
Sephiroth: Please refrain from analyzing my deep-seated fear of abandonment linked to my mother's absence and its impact on my emotional regulation, it's seven in the morning and I still haven't had coffee.
Cloud: I'm about two mental breakdowns away from resorting to gang affiliation.
Genesis: COUNTER SPELL! *flicks his wrist* TRAUMA!
Roche: I often have nightmares about Sephiroth attacking me with a spork.
Sephiroth, in the presence of a spider: I feel anti-at peace.
Zack: Dear diary, today I committed tax evasion, and felt great. Tomorrow I'll try embezzlement and eventually vandalism!
Sephiroth: Can you read this death threat note and check if my handwriting is recognizable?
Zack and Genesis: *Loudly arguing over who gets to be the ring bearer at Sephiroth and Angeal's wedding*
Angeal, laying on the floor: Good luck trying to find my will to live, gang.
Genesis: I'm flashing you a tit to maintain our friendship.
Sephiroth: If I had a gil for every time someone compared me to a cat, I'd have enough to purchase that expensive human cat bed that has been on my wishlist for ages.
Roche: Is my discount wig a joke to you, Zackary?
Cloud, placing an "I miss you" letter from his mother in Sephiroth's line of view: Yeah, that's right. Fuck you.
Lazard: Someone pinned a death threat on my office door written in glitter gel pen.
Genesis, flirting: I own an air-fryer.
Angeal: T-shirt that says "I survived Zack's power point presentation on aliens that included a photo of Sephiroth on the fourth slide"
Roche: Cloud Strife's evil twin…Grass Peace.
Sephiroth: *Showing Zack pictures of baby cows while Zack sobs into his burger*
Genesis: PUT. MASAMUNE. DOWN. No one is stealing your crayons.
Sephiroth: Genesis, I feel inspired to compliment your ass.
Lazard: Take a good, hard look at Sephiroth wearing flip-flops and tell me I shouldn't be stressed.
Sephiroth: A most efficient weapon to add to my arsenal *wielding an entire streetlamp*
Zack, talking to Angeal: My insecure trooper and faceless info guy, versus your 6'7 cat and walking red flag.
Kunsel: Is the cure to male loneliness *incomprehensible screeching* ?
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