#incorrect hazbin hotel quotes

[az-roser]

Slang Education Day

Imagining Alastor and his Great Depression ass trying to comprehend internet terms is hilarious to me.

{Part 1} {Part 2} {Part 3}

I used the LITERAL list that Amir Talai posted on his Insta of ACTUAL terms he had to Google bc of the HH fandom 😂😭. (but same bc I also didn’t know what half these terms meant 🫠)

That man is so unhinged he truly is Alastor irl

[this-hazbin-quoted]

Angel Dust: I don’t think we can mansplain, manipulate, or malewife our way out of it this time.

Alastor, cracks his knuckles: Manslaughter it is.

[radvelvetcakez]

Charlie: If I fall… Vaggie: I’ll be there to catch you. Angel: *looks at Husk* What if I fall? Husk: Then I’ll fall with you, never leaving your side. Lucifer: *watches these two interactions* Lucifer, to Alastor: And if I fall? Alastor: I’ll be the one who pushed you.

[fanby-fckry]

I’m coping <2

[hazbin-charlastor-hyperfixation]

[fabuloustrash05]

Angel Dust, about Husk: He’s just so attractive…

Cherri: Really? The bar tender?

Angel Dust: Really?? Sir Pentious???

Cherri: …Touché.

[dog-bat3]

Lucifer: “Al thinks I call him Bambi because he’s a deer”

Lucifer: “but it’s actually because his mom is dead”

[jayz4dayz]

Angel: Hey, Charlie! Tits or ass?

Charlie: You mean my preference?

Angel: Yeah! Which do ya like better? >:D

Charlie: Ohhhhh! Wings.

Angel: No, no, just tits or ass.

Charlie: I like wings.

Angel: That's nice, but-

Charlie: Vaggie has nice wings. I like Vaggie. Vaggie is my preference.

[wolfer13579]

Alastor: Last year, I married my best friend.

Charlie: Aww!

Alastor: Lucifer is still mad about it, but Rosie and I were drunk and thought it was funny.

[radioducky]

Alastor: As the folks would phrase it nowadays; this is going to blow your mind!

Lucifer: Hell yeah, blow me!

Alastor: …your mind, correct?

Lucifer:

[zootopiathingz]

Husk: I love you.

Angel: you literally just told me I was the bane of your existence yesterday.

Husk: that’s an unrelated fact.

[az-roser]

Slang Education Day

“I’m not understanding, dear. Does that mean she ate her husband ?”

At this point these are just too stupid entertaining to stop…. lmao. Leave me suggestions of what else Deer Man needs to learn 😂

{Part 1} {Part 2} {Part 3} {Part 4}

[this-hazbin-quoted]

Angel Dust: We're going to have to split up, like in Scooby Doo.

Angel Dust, to Charlie and Vaggie: You guys are Scooby and Shaggy. You can search the bathrooms.

Angel Dust, to Alastor: Velma, you get the spooky looking fridge in the basement.

Alastor: What? Why am I Velma? And why do I get the... dubious looking device?

Angel Dust: Because only Velma would say "dubious device". Alastor gets the spooky fridge in the basement.

Vaggie: And what does that make you, Fred?

Angel Dust: Bitch, I'm Daphne.

Angel Dust: Husk is Fred.

[radvelvetcakez]

Lucifer: *banging a pen on the table out of frustration* Alastor: Stop that. How would YOU feel if I banged you on the table? Lucifer: I— Lucifer: I don’t know the correct answer to that question.

[fanby-fckry]

Husk: I talked to Alastor, and we’ve got some ideas on how to get you out of your contract with Valentino.

Angel Dust: Do any of these ideas involve murder?

Husk: …

Alastor: …

Husk: …

Alastor: We no longer have any ideas!

Angel Dust: Oh, I’m cool with murder, I just wanted to know in advance.

[hazbin-charlastor-hyperfixation]